#I was also super indecisive on what to draw for todays prompt

[stupid-newt]

Cringetober day 6

Neko? Wrong, gator.

[morganaspendragonss]

Hello, fic request coming through if you are still doing them! Okay, Carlos has not been feeling well so he stays in and doesn't go to his shift. TK still has his shift, so he wants to stay with Carlos to keep an eye on him but Carlos says he is fine. TK is uneasy at work just wants to go back home, he calls Carlos but he is not answering. Tommy says TK can go check up on Carlos, while he is at home, he finds Carlos in bed and when he goes closer, Carlos is not breathing. Paramedic!TK coming through. Super angst ensues but Carlos makes it in the end after some time in a coma.

holly's august extravaganza day 25: heaving through corrupted lungs

thank you for the prompt!

thanks also to @noxsoulmate for the beta! 💚

ao3 | 2.9k | major character illness, angst with a happy ending, hurt/comfort, brief references to past, canonical character death

“Strand, I know we’re not on a call right now, but you could at least pretend to be focused.”

TK flushes as Tommy’s somewhat less-than amused voice reaches him from the back of the ambulance. He hurriedly locks his phone and shoves it in the glove compartment, though not before checking every messaging app he has for word from Carlos.

There’s none, of course, just like it’s been all day. Logically, he knows Carlos is probably sleeping—god knows he needs it—but that isn’t going to stop him from worrying, or from sending check-up texts every ten minutes. It does, however, stop Carlos from answering, which isn’t very conducive to TK’s ability to concentrate on work today.

“Sorry, Cap,” he says. “It’s just—”

“Carlos is sick and you’re being paranoid, as usual,” Nancy chimes in, audibly rolling her eyes from the driver’s seat. “Look, dude, if he said he’s fine, then he’s probably fine.”

“Well, I’m the paramedic in the relationship, and I say he’s not fine.” TK sighs and forces himself to resist the urge to pull out his phone again. “Carlos likes to lecture me about hiding injuries, but he’s exactly the same when he’s ill; he could be on death’s door and still saying he’s okay. But he hasn’t said anything today, so I’m worried.”

“You’re always worried about him.”

“Welcome to relationships,” Tommy comments. “Seriously though, TK, are you going to be okay to finish this shift? There’s still ten hours to go and we cannot afford for you to be distracted out there.”

TK doesn’t answer right away; on one hand, he’s itching to go home and check on Carlos, to make sure he’s still breathing and actually resting like he’s supposed to be. On the other hand, Carlos would probably kill him if he left work, illness be damned. It’s just… Carlos had looked so ill that morning, skin ashen and voice all but gone, and it had taken a lot of convincing for TK to still go to his own shift. He’d insisted on making sure Carlos had all the blankets and water and snacks and anything else he could possibly want, but even so, he’s still uneasy.

His gut is telling him that something’s wrong, and TK doesn’t think he can ignore it for much longer.

He’s staring out the window, considering his options, when he realises that he knows these streets. Like, actually knows them. They’re right around the corner from his and Carlos’s home, and an idea strikes TK like a lightning bolt.

“Hey, Cap?” he asks, twisting around in his seat to look at her. “How about we take a lunch break now instead of driving all the way back to the station? There’s a great place nearby, and it’s less likely that we’ll be interrupted by a call before we get food.”

Tommy eyes him suspiciously, clearly not buying his innocent act. “What are you talking about, TK?”

“Mine and Carlos’s place is literally two streets away; we could drop by and I could check in on him and make sure he’s okay. Plus,” he continues, already spotting the argument on Tommy’s face, “I’m not lying about the food. Carlos cooks in bulk, so we’ve got loads of leftover casserole in the freezer.”

Tommy pauses, indecision clear in her expression. She narrows her eyes at TK, scrutinising him. “Will this mean you’ll stop being so distracted?”

“Absolutely.”

“Alright.” She sighs and nods, and Nancy switches directions to head towards their home. “I’m holding you to that, Strand.”

TK spends the entire drive, short as it is, drumming his fingers on his knees and trying to keep the ever-growing panic at bay. Carlos is going to be fine.

He has to be.

He jumps out the ambulance before Nancy’s even fully stopped it, cursing himself as he fumbles with his keys. Tommy pats his shoulder soothingly; it doesn’t really calm him down, but TK appreciates the effort and her unconditional support. When he gets inside, he simply waves a hand in the general direction of the freezer, hoping Tommy and Nancy get the message, and barrels upstairs, Carlos’s name bursting from his lips.

“Carlos, babe, you here?” It’s a stupid question; TK had seen the Camaro in the driveway and Carlos is far too ill to want to walk anywhere—or so TK hopes—so he has to be home. But the silence draws out, and TK’s heart is pounding a mile a minute by the time he reaches the door to their bedroom.

“Carlos?” He pushes open the door, sighing in relief when he sees his fiancé sprawled across the bed, dead to the world. It’s a little weird that he hasn’t woken up yet given how loud TK was shouting, but it’s probably just because his body needs the rest. TK would bet that the apocalypse could happen outside the window and Carlos wouldn’t so much as stir.

He tip-toes towards the bed, a soft smile spreading across his lips as anxiety gives way to fondness and love. It’s not until he’s within touching distance of Carlos that he registers just how still he is; just how silent the room is.

This morning, Carlos’s breathing was loud and harsh, punctuated with periodic sniffs and coughs.

Now, he’s not making a sound.

And, as TK drops to his knees and bends over his fiancé’s body, he realises that his chest isn’t moving.

Carlos isn’t breathing.

The panic is back in full force as TK frantically presses his fingers to Carlos’s pulse point, praying for something—a flutter, anything—to indicate that Carlos isn’t… That he’s not…

There’s nothing.

Instinct takes over, TK linking his hands on Carlos’s chest and starting compressions even as his vision blurs with tears and he chokes on the sobs building in his throat.

“Cap!” he yells, not taking his eyes off Carlos. “Cap, up here!”

A minute later, Tommy and Nancy burst into the room, both halting in shock for a moment before jumping into action. Nancy moves to the other side of the bed, already pulling out the ambu bag, while Tommy comes to stand by TK.

“What do we have?” she asks, professional as ever, though there’s a clear worried undertone to her voice.

“No pulse, no respiration,” he manages, voice thick. “Skin is warm to the touch. No clear cause, but patient was congested and moderately feverish during the past few days.”

Tommy nods and gently pushes at TK’s shoulder. “Alright, you did good, TK, but you should let us take over now,” she says gently. “Come on, Nancy and I can handle this.”

TK ignores her, continuing compressions with renewed force. “I have to help him, Cap. I have to.”

“And you have, but now—”

“No!” Later, TK will be ashamed of the way he lost control like that, and he’ll have to apologise to Tommy, but the only thing he can really, truly focus on now is Carlos. He keeps pushing, feeling Carlos’s ribs give under his hands, and forces himself to keep going even though his stomach turns at the idea of causing him any pain. “Come on, baby,” he mutters. “Come on, Carlos, please.”

Time is running out; TK can tell by the way the silence is starting to feel heavier and heavier, by the looks he knows Tommy and Nancy must be exchanging over his head. Carlos’s time is running out, and TK is staring down a future he doesn’t know he can survive, and—

“I have a pulse!” Nancy shouts, and the words don’t register in TK’s head until Tommy’s hands are forcibly pulling him back and Carlos’s chest is moving and his eyelids start to flutter.

Tommy slides into the space left by TK, practiced hands checking Carlos’s vitals. “Carlos, can you hear me?”

She gets no response save for a weak groan, then Carlos’s body goes slack again and his head lolls limply on the pillow. TK takes a panicked step forward, but he’s just as quickly pushed back as Tommy secures an oxygen mask over Carlos’s face.

“Nancy, get the backboard and the gurney ready. Heart rate is arrhythmic and respiration is laboured; radio Austin Memorial and get their cardiac unit on standby.”

Nancy dashes out of the bedroom, and Tommy grabs her own radio. “Dispatch, this is RA 126 responding to a cardiac event at 2204 Allred Drive. Patient is unconscious and breathing, however at the time of arrival, he was in cardiac arrest. Duration unknown.”

“Copy that, RA 126.”

Nancy arrives with the backboard, and TK feels like an invisible observer as he watches his two teammates work. He’s stuck, barely breathing, as he watches Carlos struggle and fight for his life; he doesn’t know what he’s going to do if he dies, here and now.

TK moves as if in a nightmare as they get Carlos down the stairs and into the ambulance, eyes constantly locked on his fiancé. He thinks Tommy might say something to him, but he doesn’t hear it and he doesn’t bother to ask—terrible as it is to admit, he doesn’t care right now. He can’t care; there’s no more room inside him for anything else but Carlos.

He wraps a hand around Carlos’s wrist, two fingers resting on his pulse point, and prays that he’ll never have to feel that absence again.

*

Tommy sits beside him in the waiting room, a silent show of support while they wait for news on Carlos. Or until they catch another call; whichever comes first. Nancy is…somewhere. TK thinks she might have gone to grab some coffee or a snack, but he honestly has no idea. He’s kind of lost track of things, the hospital’s plain white walls turning time into water as they wait, and wait, and wait.

“I know how you feel, you know,” Tommy says, unprompted. “The night that Charles died, I… I spent so long blaming myself. I wasn’t there, you know? And I just kept thinking that if I had been there, if I hadn’t stayed out at Grace and Judd’s, then I might have been able to do something to save him.” She levels him with a firm, yet motherly look, and TK drops his gaze to the floor. “I know now that there was nothing. It kills me to admit it, but what happened would have happened either way, and it’s the same here. Carlos is young, healthy—there was no reason to suspect anything might happen. Certainly nothing like this. You did everything that you could, TK, and you have to hold onto that, no matter what the outcome.”

TK squeezes his eyes shut and shakes his head, giving up on keeping the tears at bay. Tommy reaches out to wrap one arm around him, but he jerks away, curling in on himself. “It’s not the same,” he whispers, voice thick. “It’s not— I knew, Cap. I knew he was ill and I still left him.”

“You said you guys thought it was just a bad cold.”

“No, I knew. I’m a paramedic, how could I have missed this?”

“These things happen, TK,” she says softly. “It’s cruel, and it’s senseless, and, more than anything, it’s unavoidable. We can go in circles blaming ourselves for it—and I know it’s worse for us; we think we should be able to see everything because it’s our job, right?

“The thing is, we’re the most blind when it comes to the people we love. We think we see everything and we always worry over them, but ultimately we just want to believe that everything’s going to be okay. That they’re going to be okay. It’s hard to accept when they’re not.”

“I should have done more.”

“You did all you cou—”

“No, I didn’t.” He lets out a sob, twisting away from Tommy’s touch once more when she tries to comfort him. “I should have insisted on staying home; I should have thought about going to check on him earlier. We have no idea how long he was lying there, dead—he was dead, Tommy—before we arrived, but if I had been there then I could have gotten him help.”

TK takes a shuddering breath and looks up at his captain, meeting her eyes for the first time since they were in the ambulance. “Tommy, if he dies, then I swear I’ll never forgive myself. Never.”

Tommy looks like she wants to say more, but just as she opens her mouth, her radio crackles to life. She sighs regretfully but stands, clasping TK’s shoulder gently.

“He’ll be okay, TK. Believe in that.”

*

Looking at Carlos, TK has never believed in anything less. He’s so still and pale on the bed and TK keeps having to check that his chest is still moving, despite the steady beep of the heart monitor and the constant thrum against his fingertips. He hasn’t let go of Carlos’s wrist since he was allowed into the room, and he doesn’t intend to let go until Carlos is back with him, awake and alive and okay.

He’s trying to believe in that outcome as a certainty, but he knows better than that. Carlos might be young and healthy, but the fact still remains that his heart stopped—coming back from that is far from guaranteed.

It’s been three days since the incident, and Carlos’s parents have been in and out, always bringing TK food and trying to engage him in conversation. He tries, for them, but it’s not easy and the attempts always fizzle out before long; TK just doesn’t have it in him anymore to talk and pretend to be positive. Any hope he ever had has abandoned him, the only thing keeping him afloat his grip around Carlos’s wrist.

A tupperware container drops into his lap, and TK looks up to see Andrea standing over him. She reaches across to caress Carlos’s cheek, then sinks into the chair beside TK, giving him a pointed look.

He sighs, attempting a weak smile for her. “I appreciate it, Andrea, but—”

“No,” she interrupts, shaking her head firmly. “No more buts; I won’t hear them. My son might not be able to make sure you take care of yourself, but I am more than capable of taking over for him. I am very strict about food, ask any of his sisters.” Her stern look softens and she pats his arm gently. “Venga, mijo. You’ll feel better for it.”

TK looks down at the dish in his lap, doing his best to keep a grimace off his face. It looks and smells delicious, like all of Andrea’s cooking, but the sight of it makes his stomach turn, his gag reflex activating at the very thought of putting any in his mouth.

“Andrea, I…” He shakes his head and picks the container up with his free hand, handing it back to her. “I can’t.”

And it’s not just that TK can’t handle any food at the moment, though that certainly plays into it.

But they’re tamales.

The Reyes family recipe tamales, passed down through generations, which Carlos has been slowly attempting to teach TK. Which Carlos always makes on special occasions, and sometimes just for the hell of it.

Which Carlos made the night he proposed.

Andrea looks set to argue, but TK forces an end to the conversation by making her take the container and turning back to Carlos.

“I’m sorry,” he says quietly, knowing he’s disappointed her. “It’s just hard.”

She sighs and rubs his back. “I know. Just don’t come to me when Carlos wakes up and realises you haven’t been taking care of yourself.”

That almost gets a laugh out of him, and TK looks over to smile at Andrea. It’s a brittle thing, but it’s a smile all the same, which is more than he’s managed in three days. She smiles back at him, and it helps him feel not so alone in all this.

A weak groan is all the warning he gets before, “Are you turning down my mother’s cooking?” reaches his ears, and TK gasps, whipping around to stare at the bed.

Right into Carlos’s eyes.

“Oh my god,” he gasps, tears springing to his eyes. “Oh my god.”

“Hey, baby.” Carlos’s voice is rough and rasping, his eyes fluttering closed again a second later, though TK can tell that he’s still awake. He reaches to the table and pours a cup of water, encouraging Carlos to lift his head and drink through the straw.

“Slow sips, that’s it,” he murmurs, rubbing his thumb gently along Carlos’s wrist, still holding on tightly.

Once Carlos has drunk his fill, he opens his eyes again and looks up at TK, gaze searching his face. “I love you,” he rasps, smiling gently, “but did you really just say no to my mom’s tamales?”

TK splutters, but he can’t keep the smile off his own face, shaking his head fondly at Carlos. “I love you too, idiot,” he says. “And tamales don’t taste the same without you there to eat them with me.”

“Good thing I’m here now, then.”

TK hums. “Guess it is.”

(Later, after the nurses and doctors have come and gone, TK will pick up the tub of tamales, left behind by Andrea when she went to tell everyone the good news.

He and Carlos will split one, pressed close together in the bed to avoid getting crumbs on the sheets. Carlos will be smiling at him the entire time, and TK will kiss him over and over, relishing the sensation of Carlos kissing him back.

And it’ll be the best damn tamale TK has ever eaten.)

[welikeitspicyreviews-blog]

Pista ng Pelikulang Pilipino 2019 Essay (Open, Panti Sisters & Lola Igna)

The Pista ng Pelikulang Pilipino (PPP) is a seven-day in length festivity of Philippine Cinema where new quality genre Filipino films are screened for seven days in every single normal film across the country. No foreign films will be screened during PPP with the exception of in claim to fame films to give the open door for the entire nation to commend its very own local films. This occasion is sorted out by the Film Development Council of the Philippines in partnership with the National Cinema Association of the Philippines. PPP’s mission is to recognize Filipino artistry in films, promote our country and its talents globally, protect our film cultural heritage, and empower every Filipino through film development and education. Over the most recent years, PPP has made a culture of help from the crowd and FDCP tends to proceed with this custom to persistently draw in film buffs across the country to belittle local films. The Film Development Council of the Philippines (FDCP) advances and supports the improvement and development of the local film industry as a medium for the upliftment of the aesthetic, cultural, and social values of the nation for the better understanding and appreciation for the Filipino character.  A portion of the main Filipino movies to ever be produced using a century prior may feel totally exquisite, however its subjects do not: family, friendship, and love keep on resounding with many. What's more, with the 100th anniversary of Philippine cinema practically just around the corner, the coordinators of the Pista ng Pelikulang Pilipino (PPP) disclosed their choice with featuring those components and to celebrate what these topics mean for us.

Romance is one of the most popular genres to watch, read and binge on. It is usually a genre where the story revolves around the love between two characters as they experience the highs and lows of love. Although most romance films end up with a happy ending ( e.g. guy gets girl, ends with a feel good 80s music and the like ), there are some that will leave you crying. Films like, Richard Linklater's ‘Before series’, Wong Kar Wai’s ‘Happy Together’ and Abdellatif Kechiche’s ‘Blue is the Warmest Color’ are one of my top picks. In Philippine Cinema, the most talked about romance film is Cathy Garcia-Molina’s One More Chance.  The film became very iconic for its painful narrative and dramatic cheesy lines that gained a cult following in social media and are still very relevant today. It shattered the hearts of Filipinos because of its sad concepts about long-term relationships, self-worth and second chances. In this year’s Pista ng Pelikulang Pilipino, there is one film that stood out for me because it reminded me of the iconic love story of Popoy and Basha without a clichè happy ending and the concepts of an open relationship.

Open by Andoy Ranay is a film about two lovers, Ethan ( JC Santos ) and Rome ( Arci Muñoz ) who have been in a relationship for almost 14 years until their relationship has gone stale so they both explored the idea of going open. But for me, the film is really about Rome trying to get out of a toxic relationship where she thinks love is enough for her to stay even if it means that person is going to disrespect and hurt her. But mostly, it's about finding one’s self-worth. The film introduces a controversial concept of a relationship where couples are allowed to see other people which I think the writers did great. Apart from introducing the concept of open relationships, they were able to show a form of emotional abuse seen from JC Santos’ annoying character. 

The film didn’t focus on the open relationship a lot but I think it's a nice way to introduce it by giving the audience a disclaimer that this isn’t for everyone. When Rome starts to realize her worth, she was able to find her happiness. She finally was able to go back to her art and make a life all by herself. This cuts to Ethan realizing how toxic he was as a boyfriend through close-up shots of a wine bottle written “Rome” on it. Looking at the camera from the beginning till the end, its like going through a journey with her and from that, we were able to ask ourselves the same question, “Is this really what happiness feels like?” and in that moment, we are able to make that decision for her and for ourselves also. This cuts to a beautiful close up shot of rome, a few seconds before the credits start rolling. And finally, she is free. 

The film starts with Rome and Ethan arguing about getting into an open relationship or breaking up. In here, we are introduced to the idea that their relationship is not going to end well. Since every time the camera cuts to a close up shot of Rome’s face, she appears as if she’s indecisive and unsure. This concludes that Rome’s selfless character enables Ethan to allow the toxicity of his character to worsen. Comparing this to One More Chance, the film starts with the same kind of set up without the idea of an open relationship. But the only difference is that the dominance lies in Bea’s character, Basha. She already knows what she wants while we are being introduced to the toxic behavior of Popoy. They both have similarities in their cinematic universe. They show the same concept of friendship, the realization of one’s self worth from a toxic relationship and lastly, finding happiness in a workplace. But looking through past films by the same production and Star Cinema, they share the same formula. What makes the two different from each other? Work wins over love while the other, the same cliché ending — guy gets girl. Maybe why I couldn’t stop comparing it to One More Chance because of the obvious similarities. Hopefully, time will come for Philippine Cinema that we will get to see new things rather than the generic formulas given by these productions. In the end, all we can do is hope, be patient and support the local independent films.

Another film-in-competition is entitled, Panti Sisters. It is a film directed by Jun Lana and its about a terminally ill father offers P100 million inheritance to the first of his three gay sons who can give him a grandchild. Starring Paolo Ballesteros, Martin del Rosario and Christian Bables. Alongside veteran actors, John Arcilla and Carmi Martin as their parents. It is obvious that the movie looks like its other predecessors since most of the cast are Jun Lana’s frequent collaborators.  Jun Lana is known for making LGBTQ + themed films like, Ang Dalawang Mrs. Reyes, and Bakit Lahat ng Gwapo may Boyfriend? This director is the most youthful beneficiary of the Palanca Hall of Famer and champ of 11 Palanca Awards for Literature. Named the group top pick, he then won the Audience Choice honor, Best Production Design and Martin del Rosario won the Best Actor. 

This film is something that the filipino masses should go and watch. Despite that there are scenes in the film which doesn’t feel necessary to the narrative of the story and there are some lines felt pushed just to prove a point but so far, all the sad passionate lines worked as a mainstream film. It explores a host of social issues that are especially timely and need to be addressed such as the worsening or increasing discrimination and hatred against people who are part of the LGBT community, whose sole purpose is to receive basic human riights and to be treated fairly, that they should still fight for their rights because they are also people who should be respected and viewed as equal to all of us. There is no requirement for them to change with the goal that they can be treated as animals and can't be viewed as a plague in the public arena. May everybody comprehend that the issues that happen in our general public are not simply in their locale. The greater part of us make issues little or enormous, they really add to the social issues in which we live. We should inquire as to whether we are a piece of the arrangement or would we say we are simply adding to the enormous issue? The film's story also discusses the devastating effects of the patriarchy that John Arcilla characterizes as their father, Don Emilio y Panti. They perform well and post-character improvement will see every one of the principal characters.

Inevitably accomplishing the foreseen acknowledgment and regard they ached for from their dad prompted enthusiastic or energetic goals of the issues in the story, these scenes were deliberately terrible because of their magnificent exhibition or featuring John Arcilla. We can contrast this work with movies at the Metro Manila Film Festival with similar formula. Much the same as the films that Vice Ganda has starred in, for example, Fantastica, The Super Parental Guardians, Beauty and the Bestie, Praybeyt Benjamin and other celebrities who are for the most part worked with Wenn V. Deramas who is known for these movies. These ‘Funny portrayals of LGBT films”  are modest and you can't deny that they earn a place in all the blockbuster office since they have a huge part in mainstream films. Yet, when I contrast these movies with each other, The Panti Sisters is definitely has more substance which is why I think it deserves to be a part of the Pista ng Pelikulang Pilipino, despite the fact that it takes after Wenn V's works. It gave the audience a lot of good points about social issues that most FIlipinos are afraid to talk about and it's something that we won't see in a Wen V. Deramas film. Regardless of how genuine or surely understood the primary characters are, interestingly, they offer equity to the character and they perform well. We trust that individuals comprehend and comprehend the significance of examination, that the film isn't only for the solace and happiness regarding an individual, it suggests generally for the good of one's own, it might have been made in the general public in which we live. 

Lola Igna's movie is one of the films released at this year's Philippine Film Festival. It is directed and written by Eduardo Roy Jr. Angie Ferro is known for being the popular actress in the film industry as Lola Igna, with Yves Flores as Tim, Maria Isabel Lopez as Nida and Meryll Soriano as Ana, the main characters in the film. The film begins with a very mysterious and intriguing scene in which she performs her usual tasks. As she goes on with her daily activities, it is notably seen that flies were swarming around and she speaks to someone that isn’t shown by the camera. Lola Igna lived a simple life and could see her life alone in that cottage near a farm she owned. The film further showed that she had a family, Nida her granddaughter and his great-grandson Bok, the son of Nida. It is interesting to see that these are the only relative she has. As the story progresses, viewers are informed that Lola Igna's character may have earned the title of "the oldest living grandmother in the world." Lola Igna was so distracted that she didn't even understand why, all of a sudden everyone was paying attention to her. Lola Igna does not speak at all and often hurts people who visit her for the same reason that she does not know it. She is not used to this attention and she is very distracted. Lola Igna became an instant tourist attraction when the news of her being the oldest grandmother in the world was released. Merchandises of Lola were released due to her popularity. These merchandises were managed by her granddaughter, Nida. 

As viewers, we could not help but feel that they were using Lola Igna in a wrong manner, to the point that her little house became a tourist attraction. It's sad to think that this is happening in the reality that there are people who will actually use you for their personal development and often these people are near you or your own family. But we also came to the realization that Nida's family would never have had enough income if they had just grown their crops and kept watch over the store. However it is not right that they are forcing Lola Igna to entertain those that visits her. In the first place, Lola Igna doesn’t want the attention she was receiving. Until a surprise came, her other great-grandson, Tim came who was Anna's grandson. Her eyes were full of happiness and it was wonderful to think that of Lola Igna’s age she would not forget about who were relatives were even after a long time. Tim is an aspiring vlogger. Amidst Tim’s visit, it’s not hard to think and doubt him for only using Lola Igna’s current popularity as clout. If one would ponder, why would Tim suddenly appear in the midst of this popularity and didn’t come before Lola Igna’s recognition as the “oldest grandmother in the world”. Our anguish and doubts over whether or not he was really a grandson were even more apparent when the only subject of his videos were the ones of Lola Igna only. As the story progresses, we discover Lola Igna's thoughts and feelings. With each passing day that she spent in this world she became increasingly depressed. To live this long is considered a blessing and a great curse. We thought at that moment that we did not want her to die not because of the title she could obtain but for the reason that she was loved in their village.She is not difficult to love or to understand but we know for ourselves that we are being selfish because of that request but do we realize in ourselves that she should not live for someone else? Especially, if Lola Igna wants to rest in peace and take away all the pain she feels in the moment. How many friends and loved ones did she witness being alive and eventually buried death? How many times would she feel this so much sadness? If you place yourself in her shoes, it is only natural to ask God to take you and rest in the suffering she has been feeling for so long. No matter how difficult her family is to accept her wishes, they know that her situation is not difficult to understand. This feeling of Lola Igna was confirmed by the scene where she wept as she invited her guests in for a chance to see and take pictures with her. Amidst entertaining the tourists, Lola Igna then collapses due to fatigue. Nida realizes that Lola Igna can no longer get the title and with this money, it is more important for Lola Igna to wake up and be with them. Following this incident, Ana had returned after a long period of time when she ran away from their village resulted in her sister Nida campaigning and planting resentment. Ana is currently pregnant and seems to be giving birth due to the size of her stomach. Ana took care of Lola Igna in addition to resolving her personal issues with her son Tim and her sister Nida. Lola Igna woke up in disbelief at what she was seeing. Because of their long absence of communication and news of Ana, they had come to their senses that Ana might be dead. Anna asks for forgiveness from Lola Igna and her sister Nida. Grandma Igna says no one should apologize, these scenes are emotional because they highlight the importance and essence of having a family. It seems like the events in the movie will signal the end of the movie but the scenes that follow are truly sad. Ana unintentionally gave birth with her son at the middle of the fields near Lola Igna's house. Viewers were supposed to be happy with the new family member but Ana did not make it alive after she gave birth. As one added to them, there was also a retraction. Lola Igna assisted Ana giving birth. When she has since refused to do it because for her it only increases her life when she helps give birth to babies. Her new great-grandson was born with a broken heart and mourning the loss of one of her grand daughter who previously came back after running away. The situation is so sad that everyone is settled and for the first time they are a whole family with Lola Igna still with them but now again the pain and loneliness of the old woman will be felt again. Anna died in the arms of her son Tim, it was hard to see your mother being at her last dying breath, with the thought that you could do nothing more to prevent it. Death is inevitable and a part of human life. Some might want death to just arrive and take them, like Grandma Igna. Is there anything she has to do in this world that she is not allowed to lose? The very last scene in the film is really attention catcher in a very effective way to ponder or think deeper to understand Grandma Igna's passionate and emotional expressions. She just stared at the audience and said nothing but her eyes spoke for her. What might be the thoughts inside her head? But the real question is, “what would you feel if you were in Lola Igna’s place?

A realization has come to mind that Lola Igna isn’t all about the title of being the oldest grandmother in the world. Lola Igna ponders on the topic of life and death. Rarely do we see films that swims through the simplest reality of life. This film had portrayed that aging can be very terrifying yet mighty. Lola Igna is an old woman who is so close to her last days of life but death seems to avoid her. She had witnessed people’s growth younger than her like the petals within a bud starts to grow to the point where after it blooms, it is withered. Lola Igna’s old age makes her rant about how death seems to have forgotten about her. She was in her time of life when she had surpassed almost every relative she knew. It is heartbreaking when things start to get closer to you, that’s when you most understand and accept it. This is death for Lola Igna. Death is not something that is a grievous end. For some, it is something to honor for death is peaceful and after that you have nothing to worry about. In the last scene where Lola Igna is seen holding a baby, the look on her face carries powerful emotions that strikes the heart of those who looks. It is the face of someone who is tired and afraid, but had no choice but to live and wait. 

After watching all these films part of this year’s PPP, we came  to ponder and commend the directors behind it. It is difficult to tell stories not quite the same as what is typically portrayed. It is difficult casting new faces and hope they’d be more effective than the big stars existing. It is hard and not easy as anyone had said. Having the opportunity to produce films is a privilege and not a right. Furthermore, with that privilege comes the test to make it well as other existing films. It's anything but difficult to state something significant, to get recognition and yell it out and you would already be able to advise the world what they need to hear. It is hard to state something important through the medium of cinema, set aside some effort to figure out how to utilize each component of film to state what you mean better. A complete film that doesn’t simply beat the cutoff time. This privilege comes with a big weight to produce films with substance and without shallow meaning. 

For the future of Philippine cinema, we wish that the public audience would take risks out of their comfort zones in the movies they go out to see. How about we watch lighthearted comedies all we want like Panti Sisters or a love story like, Open. But at the same time, how about we also  watch something different. Documentaries, thriller movies, sad movies, unusual movies, stunning motion pictures. Something that isn’t mainstream or the movie that is not the first choice of the general public. One example of this is Lola Igna. Movies are not just about feeling better or being enchanted or beginning to look all starry eyed at. Movies are also about feeling agitated, feeling startled and disappointed. It is likewise about sentiments of misfortune, of vulnerability, of rushes and amazement. Movies are about such a significant number of different things, as well, other than simply fun and love. We wish that you let movies make you something and not simply give you what you generally expect of it.