#I wanted the fleshiness. the feel. textural experience of holding her hands and being like oh that's a human

[b4kuch1n]

siren

[insertmesoftly]

Equius x Same Blood Troll Oc

An Equius simp, Ysalia Noctil's of the same blood as him but with the sign of a Sagio. She holds pedigree and the caste system in high regards and is always looking for an excuse to either lord her status and power over the 'lesser beings' or to suck up and mingle with 'exceptional blood'. She lives alone in a huge ass hive in a snowy mountaintop, isolated. For all her showmanship and big talk, her power is very little, and her place is constantly falling apart and/or getting outages. Her lusus, a big and floating Jellyfish, is usually her light source.

She got lost in her hive a lot in her childhood but now she knows the layout by heart. She read every 'respectable' romance imaginable, and when she came across Equius in the chat rooms, decided that him being so close to her in color was D E S T I N Y. She's never seen the man but his eloquence and respect for the caste along with his sharp mind and love of the high-ranked bowmen make him perfect in her mind. She will begin to obsess and modify herself to fit him.

The Sagi trait of having many interests they're passionate about stuck to me when I read it and so now I'm attaching to her multiple interests and goals like an obsession with 'the perfect tea combination', making 'the coziest blanket', and plays embarrassing to look at, but soothing to listen to instruments. She plays a version of the theremin that’s a fleshy bug creature and the sounds are its screams as her hands get closer to touching it. She also has a giant handmade armonica she built with Equius’s guidance. She’s very proud of it. Most if not all of these started out of some want to help Equius when they'd finally meet and live together.

See, she would patiently listen to all he'd say when he'd infodump, and even try getting into robots and archery a bit to be able to talk about things, he'd somewhat try to do the same but it never really clicked with him what her intent in all these things were. And it's dumb because she'd literally be like 'What's your favorite tea? What are other flavors you enjoy? How do you take it? What textures give you the best feeling? What smells are the nicest?' And he'd just be annoyed at all the questions, always her having questions, thinking she was using him as an experiment for her interests, not considering that they were born out of wanting to help him. Before taking up these extra hobbies, her main interests were the romance novels she'd read, learning new etiquette and perfecting it, polishing her lovely little hidden daggers, learning new tricks with her whip (it has jellyfish poison in it and barbed wire), and decorating/fixing her hive after these sessions (lol). Once she gets really into Equius I think she stops fixing it because she thinks she'll just move in with him. She made it pretty too, all things considered. She made the hive so big and elaborate because she was too excited when she was younger, but nowadays, she only frequents the same few halls. These are very lived in with glow in the dark stick-on trinkets used like lamps, vases filled with (paper) flowers, and ornate furniture she steals relocates from trolls that have died.

So, she keeps clinging to him with very clear intent, and it gets to a point where she confesses in a VERY roundabout way like,

'Aven't vve so gveat togethev? As the only tvvo that veally undevstand ouv positions! Couldn't vve... oh so easily slip into a... possible matespvitship? VVouldn't that be something?'

And Equius, confused and sweating just goes 'Oh... yes I suppose that could be a thing that could happen...' And that solidified it (wrongly) to her.

The whole idea she was born from came from the realization that Equius's tag for self shipping things contain mostly the more interesting combinations of lower/higher blood, and humans. Because those dynamics are what's interesting with him. And I thought, if he met someone actually on his level it would BORE him. He’d always be like 'This is fine. This SHOULD be fine. We are compatible in every way. Why ISN’T this fine??'

I got really into the dramatic thoughts of, despite them not OFFICIALLY CONSENTUALLY being together, him never telling her off from the idea and letting her believe they are (partly because he's trying to convince himself to like her, also because he's come to like her as a friend and does NOT want to hurt her feelings), his interest slipping noticeably into other people and especially his rambles about his dumb kinky thoughts eventually leads to her assuming, and I am PUTTING THIS IN QUOTATION MARKS, "he’s cheating on her" and she goes BALLISTIC. Needless to say, he breaks it to her as she explodes that… he never said yes to their relationship. It’s always been a sham. This. Will break her. She knew of his peculiarities but she was so sure he’d logically pick her, the best option there was! And yet… His heart clenches as she cries in front of him for the first time.

‘I hate you. I hate you for making me wish I had lower blood.'

Once the 'break up' occurs, she wears a black dress and veil for a good chunk of time because, in her words, "Vou don't like my outfit? I just decided it would be apvopviate fov the occasion. Vou see, I'M GVIEVING." *pathetic loud sobbing into a handkerchief*

Making her a Sagio means her focus is on the heart, ergo, on herself and her identity. So something that made her mad about learning the truth of his feelings was, she was so sure about the idea she built up over who she was... and his rejection shattered it to a million pieces. She started realizing more and more she’s not the troll she thought she was. She's not irresistibly beautiful, he left her. She's not collected and smart, she flies into fits of rage that leave her looking dumb. She doesn't have a certainly bright future, it's. In. Shambles. And more than any of her concerns for status-

She hadn't realized how much she actually liked him/depended on his love until he left. Neither of them did. Part of Equius not really taking her love seriously and seeing her as just a friend was how she talked about him to his face and how she would only bring up the 'pros to their relationship' so logically like social status and how they could support one another. Nothing much on the way of emotions, just made it sound like a business proposal if anything, albeit friendly. Nepeta, knew better. As his moiral, she got to talk to Ysalia a lot and the way she could endlessly praise him, see the good in everything he did even when it was stupid, wave off his 'quirks' as making him special, and idk, always bringing him up like a proud wife showing off her prized husband, it was annoying to the other trolls. Nepeta shipped it but stayed quiet and hoped for the best...

There’s a moment I think where Equius has his moment of realization that 'Oh. Maybe she DID really like me?' when Ysalia had 'given up', started her grieving and just moping, and had to work with a person of interest of his (I hesitate putting Aradia in this position, I’m so sorry Aradia hrrrg but you’re my best bet). Aradia says something, assuming about Equius, like how maybe he'd like them bringing back something that smells nice that could help him with a headache, but it’s the wrong thing and Ysalia stops. Ysalia had assumed this person had 'beat' her, because of her smarts. But she knows nothing about him. 'Lavender.' She chokes out. 'Lavender is his favorite scent. It the best for soothing him.' She gets very defensive suddenly, standing up from where she slumped. 'He likes to crush metal in his fist when he feels anxious, he prefers his milk cold but warm in the night after a nightmare, he doesn't feel like he deserves to touch soft things but he adores them.' She glares at Aradia. 'And he has a thing for forbidden romances. Things that can make him feel ashamed. But it's ok.' She walks away from her. 'This fad of his. I'll make sure it passes.' And all this was in some sort of comms he had installed on Aradia that he used to spy on her.

I have no ideas for what happens in the future, just her getting more and more out of control in her 'attempts to win him back.' I don't know what exactly they'd be but consider her as violent and getting more and more hilariously and pitiably delirious.

I cannot state this enough how adorably sad I’m picturing their scuffles. Equius genuinely likes her as a friend, holds her so close, almost like Nepeta. She never shunned him once, always listened to his infodumps, even actually retained the information he’d share, and was so encouraging to him whenever he’d falter. She was his biggest supporter in making his dreams come true too as an archer. So, it hurts seeing her cry. And it hurts seeing her sanity dissolve. He tries so hard to control his strength to just stopping her when she starts punching or kicking at someone, tries so hard to avoid hurting her even as others demand him to make her stop.

He started with his pity for her, trying to ignore her. Over time, without signs of her stopping, he begins getting annoyed. Then she catches him at the WORST TIME, and he gets ANGRY. He becomes careless with his actions, almost hurting her badly but she gets away with bruises. The look on her face as he almost crushed her has him feeling like shit for a while. When he's calmed down and is back to feeling pity, she surprises him in a moment of being so mad and deranged, she manages to get the better of him in a physical sense, actually finding a way to leave him powerless. Bound in the ground and unable to move. He's on the ground, wide eyes as she holds her heel to his chest, insulting him and going on about how he wasn't worth his blood. Needless to say, this was the first time he felt a lil something for her and it scares the fuck out of him. She's stopped by the others before she can kill him ‘to be rid of him once and for all’ but she promises she will. She hates him… This… is interesting to him.

Equius always saw her as his equal, and yeah it’s what bored him, but when she starts going full-on venomous, seething hatred on him.... he’s ashamed with how much he's sweating. This isn’t the friend he knew. he shouldn’t be enjoying this. Fuck. He should be trying to reconcile things. He should be telling her sorry again. No, he's not thinking about the way she dug her heel into him. Or the threat she whispered into his ear. And he definitely didn’t daydream about how she knows him so well she’d probably know how best to monopolize and bully him too if he was stuck in a hive with her as her husba- fuck shit what happened, he needs to stop he's pathetic.

Stuff happens, yada yada, it's a constant push and pull with some moments in between of them reminiscing their lost friendship, and idk how but I fabricated this scene where it all ends with her almost killing someone innocent. And after so much of his being careful around her, making excuses as to why the ones that hate her couldn’t get rid of her, and his fighting off ever having to actually fight back. He does.

He kills her. And her last words to him were accompanied by a laugh and a sputter. No accent. Just heartbreak. "You did it... haha….” She choked on her blood, some went past her lips. Still, she smiled.

"You broke my body and heart."

Oh, to give this boy more pain. Only once she’s gone does he accept that they could have been matesprites.

Some miscellaneous stuff:

- Ysalia putting out an entire table full of wine glasses out of nowhere in the middle of a battle to make fucking battle music because she refuses to fight out of spite so she'll just 'set the mood.'

- Eridan hates Ysalia. He saw her for what she was, a kiss-ass to higher blood, and he has no problem talking shit about her to her face. Even through being insulted, Ysalia would just smile and accept his harsh words like the dumbass sucker she is like o/vv/o 'Theyre talking about me hehe. I can’t believe I’m going to be friends with a sea-dweller!' His distinct hatred for her is hilarious to be because they’re in the same fucking boat. They’re idiots that were broken up with and their love interests got into trolls of lesser blood. It was such an insulting and humiliating experience for both of them. Even with his disdain, imagine moments where he drops his guard to shit talk about the others with her. He’d never admit it, but their catty talks and her sudden clinging to him once they’re both ‘outcasted’ by the others (and because there’s no one else worthy to talk to surely), they are friends.

- In a future where they reconcile and do live together, Equius is her bitch and loving every second of the 'married' life. Goes to work and his coworkers who don’t know him too well keep seeing the bruises on him and ask how he lets his matesprite of all trolls treat him like that and he just has the biggest dopiest face and replies 'They were my kismesis too'and that just explains it. This dude got together with his black romance. He’s clearly a freak. He's always glad to come home and see what new things Ysalia has to complain about, to see how many ways she can build him up with genuine affection only to tear him down and use him for the night.

[erekiosuncreativeideas]

Painfully Pointless (AHIT oneshot)

A birthday gift for @habijob, the creator of @queens-nightmare. (I'm so late, I should have posted the rest of the gifts way earlier hhhhHHH)

Summary : "A while ago, Snatcher had given the Queen the task to unfreeze everything, and of course she vehemently agreed. However, what he hadn’t planned was that she was also just as stubborn when it came to unfreeze the numerous corpse all around Subcon.

It wasn’t part of the original task, and the shade made sure she had understood that… But she kept telling him she wanted to do it. Although, unsurprisingly… She didn’t seem to want to be alone when doing it. Snatcher had an idea why: deep down, she must have realized how pointless it was too. However, denial was a powerful thing, just like hope was."

Also available on AO3 : https://archiveofourown.org/works/32162935

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Snatcher knew it was pointless, and of course he had told Vanessa about that– but she hadn’t listened to him. Sure, she was determined, but while it all started with that, the ghost knew it would end in sobs and cries. Still, there they were, in front of the manor.

A while ago, Snatcher had given the Queen the task to unfreeze everything, and of course she vehemently agreed. However, what he hadn’t planned was that she was also just as stubborn when it came to unfreeze the numerous corpse all around Subcon. It wasn’t part of the original task, and the shade made sure she had understood that… But she kept telling him she wantedto do it. Although, unsurprisingly… She didn’t seem to want to be alone when doing it. Snatcher had an idea why: deep down, she must have realized how pointless it was too. However, denial was a powerful thing, just like hope was.

-“I already asked you that, but,” he paused, looking away with a frown that showed how conflicted he was about the whole thing: “Are you sure you want to do this?” he glanced back to the Vanessa, who nodded decidedly.

-“I have to,” was what she merely replied, before pushing the doors open. The ghost’s frown deepened as he followed her inside, his mind still full of terrible memories of this place. In any case, he kept his mouth shut. Without a word, she and Snatcher gathered all the statues in the same place: the entrance. Once they were done, the Queen moved closer to one of them.

Not a human’s, but a bushcat’s.

It was terrifying to think that all of these statues used to be alive, used to be actual people walking and talking… A long time ago, Snatcher had made sure to do his part in Subcon, unfreezing the children’s corpses and burying them respectfully.

And that was why he knew why Vanessa’s hopes in that regard were all pointless. Dead people never came back to life, and he knew that from experience. However, he hadn’t been that direct with Vanessa, which… Was a bit cruel, in its own way. Yet, he wasn’t sure if that would discourage her anyway. It hadn’t when he himself unfroze the poor children, and if she was as stubborn as he was…

Slowly, Vanessa knelt in front of the frozen bushcat and brought her trembling hands to it. She was hesitating, and the ghost was sure that she was afraid of what was going to happen. He wasn’t really surprised… He had been in her shoes years ago. But despite that, the woman took a deep breath, readying herself for what was to come. She closed her eyes and frowned, visibly focused on the task at hand. Soon enough, the ice started to melt and water drops fell to the wooden floor, staining it. It didn’t take so long for the Queen to unfreeze the poor animal, the texture of ice on her hands replaced by the soft touch of leaves… But as soon as said animal was free from its ice prison, it fell down to the side, unmoving and not breathing. Its eyes were lost into space and it was clear that life had been gone from this small and frail body for a very, verylong time.

A shocked gasp left the woman’s mouth as her mind was forced to realize that yes, it was too late, way too late. All of these statues, these people… They were dead. The only thing that was left of them was their fleshy, icy shell of a body.

Horror spread on the Queen’s features as she leaned closer, her hands shaking hard. She didn’t want to believe it, he knew that, he had been there too- but there wasn’t anything they could do anymore. Still, tears filled her eyes and she lightly touched the animal, sobs leaving her mouth as she muttered a series of “no, no, no, please, no…!”

The sight was a difficult one for Snatcher. It was like re-experiencing something he wished he could forget… But it was also hard to see Vanessa feeling so guilty over something she did while being controlled by a merciless entity. He wanted to tell her it wasn’t her fault- and it wasn’t, but he was aware that wouldn’t help. All of these ice statues… It was a chilling reminder of how dangerous her powers were and how deadly they had been to so many people, even if she hadn’t been herself when doing it. No matter what he’d say, she wouldn’t listen, just like she hadn’t when she decided to unfreeze everyone. And so… Without saying anything, he just put his hands over her shoulders, trying to comfort her the best way he could- but then, as if woken up from her trance, she span towards him and hugged him tightly. He could feel her icy tears touching him as she sobbed, crying and screaming how she was so sorry, how she wished she could just go back and avoid the freezing… The shade hugged her back, frowning more as he glared into space:

-“It wasn’t your fault,” he told her, patting her back as she cried against him: “you know that.”

-“I did this! It is my fault!” she protested, and he kept brushing her back. No words would help her to feel better in this moment. What she had witnessed had deeply shocked her, reminding her of the Subcon tragedy. And while she hadn’t caused the freezing out of her own free will… It wasn’t so surprising she blamed herself so much for it.

… While there was actually a person responsible for the murder of the villagers.

“I’m going to make him pay,” Snatcher thought with determination, holding Vanessa tighter: “I won’t let him hurt anyone.”

His eyes glanced back to Vanessa and his expression softened at the sight.

-“You can go outside if you want,” he offered, his voice a bit calmer: “I’ll take care of everything.”

He felt her shaking her head and, slowly, she stepped back, breaking the hug:

-“… No,” she retorted, her voice breaking from all of her crying: “I want to do this. I have to,” she insisted and Snatcher didn’t push the argument further. Maybe this was her way of coping… Though it was a very painful one, he had to admit that much.

One by one, she unfroze the statues, holding back her tears as she recognized the people she had known in the past. The ghost had offered to unfreeze some of them himself, “to be done with that whole thing faster”, but she had refused. Surely she had guessed this was his way of saying he could help, but it seemed like she was really determined on fixing what she had done years ago.

Well… Is this could be considered as “fixing“.

It took them a good hour to finish unfreezing everyone and soon, there were several rows of corpses on the floor, all lying down with their hands crossed over them. Vanessa remained silent for a moment and, before Snatcher could say anything, she crouched down next to each corpse, closing their eyes as gently as she could.

-“I’m sorry,” she whispered to them: “I’m really sorry,” before going to the next person and repeating the same words and gestures. The shade watched her without saying anything, knowing she was trying really hard to apologize for what she had done- but then again, it hadn’t been her fault. It was someone else’s.

When she was done, she stood up and took a few deep breaths, probably resisting the urge to cry again. The ghost hesitated, not really sure if he should say anything. After what seemed to be a few minutes of respectful silence, the Queen turned around and looked at him, tears still in her eyes:

-“Will you help me bury them?” she asked him softly. The answer was obvious and Snatcher nodded his head, floating closer to one of the corpses:

-“Yeah,” he murmured, picking up someone who used to be a servant of the Royal Family. He carried the person to the door and glanced back at the sorrowful woman: “We need to get them outside first.”

Vanessa nodded dutifully and picked the bushcat from earlier, the first being she had unfrozen. Holding it tightly against her chest, she joined the ghost and opened the doors, her face full of regrets and sadness.

-“Let’s do it,” she concluded before making the first step outside, one that was the continuation of her attempt at “fixing” things as much as she could given the irreversible circumstances. Then again… This was her way of coping.

A painful, pointless way of coping, but one nonetheless.

[darkhymns-fic]

A Little Too Sweet

Lloyd gets a bit obsessive when making Colette's favorite meals.

Genis never wants to see another piece of strawberry ever again.

Fandom: Tales of Symphonia Characters: Lloyd Irving, Colette Brunel, Genis Sage, and the rest Rating: G Mirror Links: AO3 Notes: It was Tales of Symphonia's anniversary on August 29th! (Which I forgot about!) I had nothing for it except this short fic from a while ago that makes no sense. Have fun.

Getting through Latheon Gorge was both frustrating and confusing (especially when the weird wind gusts from the vibrating flowers that dotted the landscape just didn’t seem to work) but after a long trek, the whole party decided to settle down for both rest and sustenance.

Unfortunately, almost (and key word, almost) no one was looking forward to it.

“Hey!” Lloyd shouted from the side of the glade they all sat in, his face beaming. “Just got lunch ready!”

Genis, seated by the grass, gave a deep sigh. “Is it fruit salad agai-”

“It’s fruit salad! Everyone dig in!”

The boy in red had a huge platter held in his hands. It was stacked with rows of neatly cut slices of pineapple, strawberries, apples, lemons and oranges, and was sprinkled with a wide assortment of blackberries here and there, with occasional almonds to add in some more texture to the softness of the meal. Some of the group gave weak smiles, some looked to the ground tiredly, but only one had her eyes lit up at the sight.

“That looks so good, Lloyd!” Colette sat neatly on the ground, just before the dining cloth. “Oh! You even made part of the salad into a cute little doggy face!”

“Heh, yep!” Lloyd set down, admiring his own handiwork in the culinary arts. “That’s what the blackberries were for! To make the nose and eyes!”

“…Is this why you sent me out into the woods to search for those?” Zelos asked incredulously. His clothing looked a little frayed. Even his hair sported the occasional twig. “That took me like two hours!”

“Yeah, but it was important!”

“Lloyd…” Genis started, looking at his bowl that Lloyd was happily dumping some of the fruit into. “Do you think you can like… I don’t know… let me cook next time?”

“I don’t mind making stuff for you guys!” Lloyd proclaimed.

Sheena had to intervene. “Yeah, but, we’ve only had fruit for the past three weeks.”

“Fruit is very healthy for you,” Presea commented. She dumped some kind of sauce onto her bowl that no one really knew what it consisted of.

“And also very sweet!” Colette smiled with happiness after each bite. “Oh! Maybe we can make fruit sandwiches next time?”

Lloyd gave her a thumbs up. “Yeah, no problem!”

“That is not a thing.” Genis glared at both of his friends. “That is not a thing that you make. I don’t care.”

“Presea is right however.” Regal had his bowl very close to his face, courtesy of his shackled hands just making everything difficult for him. “Fruit is healthy. It provides your daily value of fiber.”

“We’ve had plenty of fiber!” Genis tried his best not to shout, but that was the result of being force-fed all assortments of fruits for an extended period of time. “Too much fiber! Sis! Say something!”

Raine was munching pleasantly on her share. “There are lemon wedges. I suppose it’s satisfactory enough.” She gave her little brother a frown. “Even if Lloyd stops making us food, it’s not like I would ever have a chance to experiment with meals of my own, according to everyone’s complaints.”

For Genis, it was either food boredom or actual death. He wasn’t sure what was worse.

“Well, I’m not complaining. My bud is a master at this stuff! And-” Zelos squinted at his bowl, mussing it around with his fork. “Um, no uh, no melons?”

A familiar groan from a familiar ninja. “Of course you miss your damn melons.”

“Oh! I forgot about that, Zelos! Don’t worry. I made you your own dish!”

Zelos was close to having tears in his eyes. To think that his friend would do that for him. The venture out into the woods to collect ingredients for Colette’s doggy portrait was completely forgotten. “Aw, Lloyd!”

“Here you go!” Lloyd plopped the prepared dish in front of Zelos. “Eat up!”

It was fried octopus. A really big one. A really big, fleshy looking, eye bulging octopus.

The dish also had with it some tuna and red snappers to the side, but… the tentacles of the octopus were… touching them…

“Oh, that looks pretty good.” Sheena pointed at the plate, her mouth full. “Got your own seafood platter there.”

Zelos sat there in dejection. “…Yeah.”

Genis saw how it was. He could always see through his best friend, and these past three weeks had made it all the more obvious. But this didn’t mean that Lloyd should subject the others to constant fruity meals just to impress a girl that didn’t even need impressing!

He scuttled close to Lloyd, trying to drag him away from his conversation with Colette with all the force his little arms could muster.

Lloyd turned to him with confusion. “Genis? What is it?”

“Lloyd, you need to stop,” the child stated. “The fruit cocktails were pretty cool at first, until you kept making them four nights in a row. That fruit sculpture was honestly neat, but it took you like half the day to make it and you didn’t even sleep because of it! Also, you can’t make sandwiches, Lloyd. We all know this. Don’t try to make fruit sandwiches. I don’t care what the Wonder Chef told you, he’s completely wrong. Don’t you miss eating beef, Lloyd? Like actual protein? We can’t live off fruit for the rest of this journey!”

Lloyd blinked. He gave a brief glance to Colette, who looked to be in heaven with her meal, then he turned back to Genis. “But I gotta.”

“No. No, you don’t.”

“Colette likes it.”

“She can handle some beef stew once in a while! If this is about making up for not getting her birthday present on time-!”

“Hey, Zelos!” Lloyd shouted suddenly, looking past Genis’ head. “How do you like that dish?”

There was the distant sound of Zelos sobbing.

“Great!”

“Lloyd,” Genis pleaded. “Please listen to reason. I don’t think my digestion can take it anymore. I don’t know how the heck you and Colette can.”

Lloyd looked back down at his own fruit share, already half-eaten. To the side of it, some lemon wedges and apple slices were pushed to the side, looking like someone’s face and long hair. Oh no.

“But I gotta,” Lloyd said, more to himself than to Genis.

Genis put his face in his hands. “I want to die.”

A week later and they were finally back at Altessa’s after some important events happened, but honestly, Genis was past both caring and remembering what they were. He had been pushing through fatigue the entire time, having had no iron intake in the slightest.

Even his sister was looking paler than usual, leaning on her staff as they all stumbled into the house carved into the mountain. “I’m going to take a long nap,” she muttered.

Tabatha greeted them at the door, her robotic motions having long gotten used to by everyone. “Hello. I was. Just making dinner. Roast. Beef. With potatoes. And garnish. Would you like-”

“Please,” Sheena uttered, falling to the floor in a heap. The malnutrition was finally catching up to people. Even Regal and Presea could barely hold their taciturn composures, their eyes lighting up on the thought of actual cooked food on their plates. Zelos was not technically starving, but he was suffering plenty, choking on his octopus-fruit cocktail that Lloyd had insisted on him eating on the way back for some reason.

Of course, Lloyd and Colette were perfectly fine! Just peachy! They were both eating actual peaches at this very moment that Genis was so tempted on burning up with his fire magic. “I’m full now, but thanks Tabatha!” Lloyd told her.

Colette nodded. “Me too! Oh!” She stood up straight after thinking up a… oh no. “Lloyd, do you know how to make peach cobbler?”

“Do I?” Lloyd said to her eagerly. After a moment, he emphasized his answer when she still waited for it. “Yeah, I do.”

“What if we make some for everybody for dessert?”

Lloyd pumped a fist in the air. “That sounds great!”

Usually such a treat would be enough to make any mouth salivate. But all Genis wanted to do was hurl. No more fruit… please…

When Genis failed to convince Lloyd to stop with the meals, he just fell to fate. After everything Lloyd did to save Colette, it made sense that he would try to make up for lost time, to make Colette feel happy, despite the hardships of the journey. When one thought about it, it was rather sweet and romantic. Making her favorite dishes whenever he had the chance to, and as luck would have it, Colette never getting sick of it once! Not! Once!

Genis kinda hated Lloyd a little right now.

Watching his two dearest friends make their way to the kitchen with Tabatha, a dark thought burrowed in his mind.

Once this journey is over, Lloyd, I’ll make some fruit dishes for you all right. It’s your favorite thing now, isn’t it? I’ll sneak in some grape tomatoes for you. Colette likes those, but you’re going to hate it. And you can’t hate it because it’s a fruit. You’ll have to gulp it down for Colette’s sake! Then you’ll be sorry!

But even Genis knew he would never follow through on his revenge plan. In the end, he was just tired. Besides, if he was getting a real meal today, he supposed more fruit in his already fruit-saturated diet wouldn’t be too bad.

He could just send a fireball Lloyd’s way in their next battle anyway. Say it was a mistake. Maybe singe Lloyd’s hair a little. That was good enough revenge for Genis, and he would take it gladly.

[heartslogos]

seas who could sing so deep and strong [92]

Kore wakes to the sound of something familiar, something that pulls at something deep in the recesses of her mind. Not like a new memory - and old memory, being made new again, and being made fresh with its unfamiliarity - resurfacing and coming over her like a wave that she needs to brace for. This is not a memory, this is something pulling at a memory. There is a difference.

Kore wakes, the heat of one of her numerous companions steadily breathing against her back - based on the size and lack of snoring she’s going to guess it’s either Valencia or Alpha - and her Djinn cuddled up against her stomach and chest, its fleshy body warm against the palm of her hand as she absently runs her thumb over one of its ridges.

She looks around, blearily looking for the source of this sound.

And she sees Umbra sitting next to the somachord, hand raised over it.

Umbra’s back is to her as he quietly interfaces with the machine.

She begins to register the actual sound, now.

A woman’s voice. Singing. Not words, just sound. Slow, simple.

She knows what comes next.

A pause.

A chorus.

Her throat and chest close and she croaks out, “Stop.”

The sound is swallowed by the chorus of voices, children’s voices, repeating back the notes.

Memories shake inside of her, a rumbling and a clattering that stirs up the dark and the dirt and the forgotten and the lost and the willingly consigned, obscuring everything else as she quickly untangles herself from Sentinel, kubrow, and blanket. The Orbiter floor is cold beneath her knees and palms as she drags herself out of bed, sheets tangled around her ankles, pinned by her heavy dog - Alpha, based on the color - and she grunts when she’s pulled back by his weight.

“Stop,” Kore repeats, as the voices was over her, high and young and gentle and so very unaware of what they are about to become. The memories rise around her, pulling her down and into them.

Is the Orbiter floor cold, or is it just her hands?

Margulis. Would-be-mother-Margulis. Mother of all Tenno. Mother of every single child on that fucking ship.

Memories.

Margulis and her kindness. Margulis and her empathy. Margulis and her courage. Margulis and the Jade light.

Margulis’ outrage. Her fear. Her disgust.

Margulis and her smiling face even after she was blinded.

Margulis’, “It is not your fault,” after they found out that she was condemned.

The songs. The books. The stories. The comfort that never quite reached her, but the sentiment and the effort did.

Kore never believed in the things Margulis told them - that they were gifted, that they were alive for a reason, that they are children and Orokin and should be protected and held precious, that they weren’t monsters or tools or things to be experimented and studied and built upon. Kore didn’t believe it when they were muzzled and kept in chains and prisons.

But Kore believed in Margulis’ intent. And she appreciated it. The kindness. The attempt to make them people instead of things again.

Kore appreciated it, even if it was not for her.

“Stop,” Kore repeats as the song begins to crest, to evolve, to complicate and change. Umbra hears her now, or maybe decides to pay attention to her, and turns over his shoulder.

Kore reaches out and gets her fingers around the tail end of his ragged scarf, clenching the black material in her fist.

“Stop,” She repeats.

Umbra flicks his wrist and the song changes to an ambient thing that fades from her attention as she lies on the floor, half tangled in bedsheets, fist clenched around Umbra’s scarf.

Umbra’s hand moves over her, running fingers through her hair. The texture of his hands catches on her hair a little. Kore closes her eyes.

Alpha, awake now, quietly chuffs. She doesn’t hear him move - he really does live up to his namesake - but she feels it when he noses at her side, and then places a paw on her back, gently nudging her.

“I miss her, because I feel sorry for her,” Kore tells Umbra.

Umbra, who has known her mind as she knows his, Umbra who she cannot lie to. Umbra, who is part of her soul and therefore can tolerate no lies.

(Every warframe she has been in, every single body she has piloted, all of them become part of her and she a part of them. Empty slates that bear the faintest ghosts of her hand.)

“She was not my mother,” Kore says as Umbra untangles her from her bedsheet and helps her stand up. “But she wanted to be. For all of us. And I can appreciate that. And hen they took her away for it. They took her away from the ones that did need her, that did rely on her, that did want the connection she offered.”

Kore sits back down on her bed, Djinn immediately slotting itself into place in her lap, like a very fleshy toy, and Alpha lies back down along her side, a quiet and warm bar of heat.

Umbra kneels next to her, silent. She reaches over and puts her hand on his shoulder, and she feels the warmth of transference between them. She imagines a single gold palm print on his shoulder as energy flows from her to him.

There is a sea of empty calmness, and the faintest touch of sympathy.

“What were you looking for?” Kore asks. She knows Umbra wanders her ship. Sometimes he just sits in the transference chamber, or he stands on the observation deck and just looks out into the darkness of space. She hasn’t really come across him actively doing anything, not like today.

She feel-remember-hears the sound of drums. The sound and beat of them familiar. The ceremonial drums for summoning the guardians. The Dax, the Tenno.

She wonders if he misses the familiarity, the formality, of being summoned. The drums, and then the war.

“Ordis,” Kore says, “The drums.”

“Of course, Operator,” Ordis replies, instant and clear, and the soma chord switches once again. Umbra’s chin tilts up, as he refocuses on the device and his posture seems to relax just a little.

Kore lets her hand fall from his shoulder, and he turns to look at her.

“It’s okay,” Kore says, “You don’t need permission to remember the things that hurt you.”

Umbra shakes his head, just a little, after a pause. He holds his hand out and Kore takes it. She feels the wash of a faint and lingering emotion.

Pride.

Kore understands this too.

“You don’t need an excuse or permission for that either,” Kore says. “You can be proud of what you once were.”

Umbra’s fingers curl around her hand and he turns back towards the somachord.

Kore slowly lies down, and goes back to sleep.

[tipsycad147]

How to make your own chakra stone set

by Michelle Gruben

A chakra stone set is a small collection of gemstones, in which each stone corresponds to one of the body's subtle energy centers. You've probably seen them for sale in metaphysical shops and online.

Chakra stones are used in energy healing and meditation. Witches and Pagans may also use them for spellwork or divination. To the well-practiced crystal user, a chakra set is like a painter's palette. Handling the chakra stones allows the practitioner to focus on a particular vibration (or "colour" of energy), quickly accessing it to achieve his or her aims.

Making your own chakra set is an easy and fun exercise, even for crystal beginners. It's a way to create personalized tool for healing and contemplation. As you assemble your chakra set, you'll learn lots about the various stones and their energetic properties.

In this article, we'll look at how to put together your own set of chakra gemstones. We'll also share some instructions for getting your chakra stones ready to use.

The Colour Method

The concept of chakras, or psychic energy centers, originated in ancient India and is part of the discipline of Yoga. But Western magick workers have thoroughly adopted the chakra system, thanks in large part to New Age writers in the 1970s and 1980s. The most widely-read book on chakras is probably Wheels of Life, which has sold over 200,000 copies since it was published in 1987.

In New Age thought, there are usually seven chakras. Each chakra corresponds to a different color on the spectrum, with red at the base or Root Chakra, and violet (or white) at the top of the head. The colours represent different frequencies of vibration, from low to high. The idea of a "rainbow" of chakras has been so influential that it shows up in most modern writings on psychic energy.

Making Your Set

While not everyone agrees whether the colours of the chakras are literally true, the rainbow is indeed a handy metaphor for different types of energy. So we'll use the rainbow concept to help put together our bag of chakra stones. (Bonus: Choosing by color helps you remember which stone goes with which chakra.) We'll also stick with the usual seven chakra system—though you may feel free to adapt your kit to a system with more or fewer chakras.

One more note: For each chakra, I've included a list of suggested crystals or stones. Choose your favourite stone from each category, and end up with a chakra set that's truly unique.

Tumbled gemstones are the most popular for chakra kits, because they're relatively inexpensive and hold up the best to being handled. But crystals can be found in all sizes and shapes. Crystal spheres, wands, discs, pyramids, jewelry, uncut rough stones—any of these can be assembled into chakra sets.

I've tried to balance rare and expensive gemstones with ones that are readily available at most crystal shops. (A few stones appear in more than one list. Choose the attribution you feel is most appropriate.)

Root Chakra

Associated with the colour Red, the Root Chakra sits at the base of the spine.  It allows one to connect with Earth energy, and is strongly linked to instinct, survival, and the physical body. Many Root Chakra stones, like Red Jasper and Hematite, contain a high concentration of iron.

Just about any red or earth-coloured stone can represent the Root Chakra in your kit. Black gemstones—often associated with protection—are also suitable Root Chakra stones.

Suggested stones for the Root Chakra: Red Jasper, Hematite, Garnet, Black Tourmaline, Obsidian, Mahogany Obsidian, Ruby, Red Tiger's Eye.

Sacral Chakra

The Sacral Chakra is located near the navel, lower back, and sexual organs. Its color is Orange and it governs passion, pleasure, and creative force.

Since the Sacral Chakra rules appetites, look for stones in bright, mouth-watering colours and pleasing textures. Our favourite Sacral Chakra crystal has got to be Carnelian—a vibrant red-orange gem whose name means "fleshy."

Suggested stones for the Sacral Chakra: Carnelian, Amber, Pink Moonstone, Citrine, Orange Calcite, Sunstone, Gold Sandstone.

Solar Plexus Chakra

Located in the middle of the body (just below the rib cage) the Solar Plexus Chakra is the center of personal power. Strength, charisma, confidence, and willpower are attributes that it controls. It's linked to the colour Yellow. When shopping for Solar Plexus stones, look for a yellow-gold colour, and/or stones with sparkles and rays.

Suggested stones for the Sacral Chakra: Tiger's Eye, Citrine, Yellow Calcite, Ametrine, Rutilated Quartz, Yellow Aventurine, Yellow Jasper, Yellow Sapphire.

Heart Chakra

The Heart Chakra allows one to experience love, generosity and empathy. Its main functions are processing emotions and connecting with others' energy.

Green is the colour usually assigned to the Heart Chakra, and there are many, many green stones that are excellent for Heart Chakra work. But some stones on the list are pink or mixed colours. Not to worry. Remember: The earliest texts on pranic energy don't mention chakra colours, so it is likely that chakras of yogic and tantric traditions were colourless. Pick a stone that screams "heart energy" to you, regardless of the colour.

Suggested stones for the Heart Chakra: Green Aventurine, Jade, Emerald, Rose Quartz, Pink Sapphire, Peridot, Unakite, Green Calcite, Green Fluorite, Rhodonite, Malachite, Chrysocolla.

Throat Chakra

The Throat Chakra is linked to colour Blue, and it governs communication, self-expression, and truth. Situated between the head and the heart, it helps to mediate between thought and emotion. It's no big surprise that most of the stones on this list are in shades of blue.

Suggested stones for the Throat Chakra: Sodalite, Lapis Lazuli, Blue Kyanite, Blue Tiger's Eye, Blue Goldstone, Amazonite, Turquoise, Blue Apatite.

Brow Chakra

Also called the "third eye," the Brow Chakra is located just above the eyes, between the eyebrows. Its color is Purple, and visualization, dreaming, and intuition are some of its functions. Working with the Brow Chakra helps to awaken psychic gifts (and perception in general).

When choosing crystals that vibrate with the Brow Chakra, deep blue or violet stones are recommended. Stones with iridescence or moving patterns are also very stimulating to the light-sensitive third eye.

Suggested gemstones for the Brow Chakra: Amethyst, Lapis Lazuli, Purple (or Rainbow) Fluorite, Shungite, Labradorite, Moonstone, Opal, Kyanite.

Crown Chakra

Located just above the head, the Crown Chakra is the body's link with celestial and/or Divine energy. Just as White combines all the colours of the rainbow, a fully-functioning Crown Chakra blends all of body's diverse energies into a unified being.

Crown Chakra gemstones tend to be clear or white in colour. They are though to be the stones with the highest and purest vibrations.

Suggested gemstones for the Crown Chakra: Clear Quartz, White Moonstone, Opalite, Selenite, Angelite, White Sapphire, Apophylite, Milky Quartz, Celestite, Moldavite.

Putting it all together

Pretty soon, you should have collected seven (or five or nine or ten) stones to go in your chakra set.

If one of the stones doesn't feel right, or doesn't appear to be playing nice with the others, then kick it to the curb. (I mean, gratefully place it somewhere to be re-purposed.) Keep shuffling rocks around until you have a set that represents the chakras to you.

Next, you'll want a home for your stones. A dedicated bag or box keeps the set from accumulating physical and psychic dust when not in use.

Depending on what stones you've picked out, some of them may need to be stored separately from the rest. Softer materials can pick up dings and scratches from their pokier neighbors. Selenite and Fluorite, for instance, are fragile divas. To avoid the problem, choose gems that are close on the Mohs scale. Or, work out a way to keep them in separate bags or compartments.

Finally, as with any magickal tool, it's a good idea to cleanse and bless your chakra stones. Use your favourite crystal cleansing method. There are several effective methods: Smudging, sunlight or moonlight, water (if it won't harm the stones you've chosen), other crystals, visualization, and breath. Set your intention that these stones will be your partner on your journey of learning and healing.

Attuning chakra stones

If you like, you can follow the cleansing process with an attunement exercise. This is definitely recommend if you've made the chakra set for your own personal practice. Basically, attuning your stones allows each one to get acquainted with the energy center it's going to represent.

To attune your chakra set, dim the lights, light some candles or incense--whatever helps you get into a meditative state. Take a few deep breaths and let go of any energy build-ups or distracting thoughts.

Starting with your Root Chakra stone, place each stone in turn over the chakra that it corresponds to. You will be adding the stones one by one, until you're "wearing" all of them. (Unless you have a lot of hands, the easiest way to do this is lying on your back.)

You can use a diagram of the chakras to help you place the stones—but remember chakras can be in slightly different places on different individuals. You will know the first stone is placed correctly by its feel. Some people experience the feeling as equilibrium, or heaviness, or a light tingling vibration. I like to describe it has a ball settling into a hole in the ground—once it's in the right place, it tends to stay comfortably settled.

Once the stone is placed on the chakra, gather some of the energy in that chakra and send a little pulse outward. This is similar to directing energy with your hands, but the energy starts in and exits directly from the chakra center. It may take the form of a beam, or a ball, or small petals of energy reaching outward.

Wait for a reply. You may feel the stone either absorbing the energy or reflecting it back to you (or a little of both, or nothing at all.) Take another breath, and try it again. Let the stone and the energy of your body "talk" until they feel as if they are in harmony. Do this until the stone can't possibly accept any more energy, or you sense that the dialogue has stopped.

Leaving the Root Chakra stone in place if possible, move on to the Sacral Chakra. Repeat the stone-charging process. Though you will be focusing on attuning only one stone at a time, you will have a gentle awareness of all the tones you have charged so far. Remove the stones in the reverse order, starting with the Crown Chakra and working down to the Root Chakra.

To check your work, put the chakra stones in a bag or on a table and gently run your receptive hand over them. Do you feel a difference in energy between the stones? Some may feel warmer or cooler than the others, or appear to vibrate faster or slower. (That's good!) If you did an exceptional job of attuning the stones to your body, you may even feel sensation in one of your chakras when holding the matching stone.

Your chakra set is now ready for energetic healing, divination, and meditating on the chakras. Chakra stones may need to be cleansed and re-attuned periodically to keep them working their best.

https://www.groveandgrotto.com/blogs/articles/making-a-chakra-stone-set

[riting]

Body Bags by Jmy James Kidd

devika v. wickremesinghe on Body Bags

My belly bottomed out when TJ hit the bass, and the floor of PAM sunk 200 feet below-down beneath the building, the concrete, the dirt, and I peered off the edge of the bench to get a look at the deep crevice below. I braced myself for vertigo and almost fell off my perch, but the deep sluice filled with a fluid that somehow refracted the bodies of the two yellow creatures, so that while I was looking into the depths I could see their slippery skins in clear detail and they seemed somehow larger and closer. 

I was curious to see how they lived and moved. They crawled, backstroke, ate up space with butts and bones. The deep fluid sloshed back and forth, PAM lilting like a ship, and as the waves got bigger the bass resounded.  Not at the will of the tides, nor directing the flow, but expertly riding the curves, Perin and JMY’s incessant traversing propelled forward by hunger and desire, mouth and buttholes reaching, had a rhythm that my cells recognized. Their thin transparent fabric hugged and sagged and my subdermis nodded. My cytoplasm was seduced and cells serenaded-only to be suddenly surprised by the evolution of a flicker of an emergent limb. Some sense in me remembered growing my limbs. In this way this tide pool was an exposition but also a reflection.  

I was not perceiving JMY and Perin dancing “like” anything. Metaphors and anthropomorphic descriptions are tempting me (Yes, salamanders yes snakeskins, cidacas, anenomes, sure, but… ) but a description of an animal has a delayed separation to it, and the experience I am talking about had no separation. On hands and knees, backs and bellies, JMY and Perin generously carved out rivulets of timespace to show an expositionmeditation on layers that dance dynamically Inside Of Us. Masterfully wild movements rose out of the depths. Perin’s arms flung out like tentacles, shattering the glass of the windows and knocking out the traffic light on Figueroa. JMY’s legs grew three times the size, whipped around three times and kicked off the roof. That giant chicken statue ran for cover. It was then when the floor started to bounce and breathe like a giant fleshy trampoline, and I realized they had been dancing on PAM’s pelvic floor, resilient and rebounding. 

Tag from Jmy:

Oh devika! My time life in Los Angeles is laced with devika dancing, teaching, living, being, friending, eating. She came to this place and went feral. This is our life. dev is my community.

devika v. wickremesinghe is a los angeles expressive.

Brian Getnick on Body Bags

COMPLAINT: All dancers practice but do all dancers have a practice?

Most dance that I see in Los Angeles on largish proscenium stages are dances of achievement: medleys of dance representations which reference a dance history that ends prior to the conceit that dance can be any intentional movement. In Los Angeles, this conceit has long been taken up by performance artists in gallery spaces, artists for whom the rehearsal process is anathema to the representations of the so called real, and whose work is more often than not, evacuated of the displays of strength, flexibility, and precision that are the privileged qualities of the ubiquitous dance of achievements. At Pieter Space, founded in 2009 by dance artist Jmy James Kidd the ethos of training the body to be physically skilled and the possibilities of receiving all movement into ones dance making, are invited to merge. What happens then, when a dancer, with years of training, takes “any intentional movement” as an invitation to see all impulses towards moving, all the reverberations in the body that movement causes, and all the staggers, falls, misses, (often discarded inelegant movements) as their crucible? This fine-tuned looking and trying takes more than practice, it requires “a practice”.

BODY BAGS AT PAM

Outside PAM's largest window, palm fronds could be seen sailing down in the wind. Inside the room, the movements of the two dancers were overlarge, outsized, extra, decadent; a massive dance in a bedroom. The audience sat between these two storms. Dressed in gauzy ochre jumpsuits and shot through with an alternately storming and oceanic base composition by Tara Jane O’Neil, Body Bags, created by Jmy James Kidd and performed by Kidd and Perin McNelis, was a dancer’s practice on display. Body Bags is broken up into five or six large passages of movements that Jmy or Perin initiate and then layer in staggered time. I will analyze two of them and recount where I began to see a practice emerge.

After an initial crawl in from the bathroom (Perin) and the hallway (Jmy) the first passage explores space by bullying the thin envelope of air between dancer and witness. It called for delicate unfurling hands, giant steps countered by arched backs that harkens to the melodrama of Isadora Duncan. In the dance of achievement this would be enough, the dance signifier would remain a citation, but for Kidd and McNelis, the formal and associative qualities of Duncan (arms outstretched and leading / high minded elegance) are overcommitted to: They relish in the absurd beauty of the Duncan-dance-artefact to the degree that it decays in front of us. In other words they commit themselves to repeating and re-interpreting in real time an earlier dance signifier until the tiny stumbles, the near misses, and broken patterns switch from being the precarious details of a imperfectly achieved representation to the thing itself. This is where “the practice” first starts to show itself: a perceptual switch from recognizing and thereby judging the achievement of a form into being present to concretely executed material. The hick-ups and near misses are the chosen texture. Smoothness and symmetry are, for the time being, out the door.  

In the next section, Jmy broke from the enormous steps and ponderous elegance and began a slow decline, her legs pumping at the knees, her arms outstretched, her gaze fixed on a lucky witness. She lowered down until she was finally squatting on her calves, her arms still in a "T". It takes about 2 minutes and she holds it there, her body quivering with focus and teetering on collapse. Yet she stays. Jmy once said to me something to the effect of "Failure is boring" and yeah, failure is a boring thing to put on a pedestal when succeeding means showing off a fine tuned exploration of energy, elevation, sexuality, a hearty feminine energy and connection between performers. Perin for her part while seeming to follow and look to Jmy for cues also is a free operator, you see her make choices that are distinctly hers: where Jmy’s expression is interior and placid, Perin stares wide eyed and ferocious, where Jmy transitions from shape to shape in bows and curves, Perin’s transitions are quickly angular. You see that this practice highlights difference. Their contrasting inclinations are their distinct modes of thinking, they’re of two minds about how to move and yet remain adjacent in a game of chasing shadows.

This basic structure of one dancer falling into a task, then the other picking it up again before moving on has the effect of a distorted echo, it gives you time to see the  "how" of the task and it clues us in that the work that came behind it a thing of value. The process of looking into what happens in the leg joints during a transition up or down shows the witness that these large phrases are also stages for much finer, small motor dances: the quivering lending a dramatic tension to hydraulic lift while the delicacy of the fingers, floating in space, perform a sly weightlessness. The practice on display here is that every part of getting into the conditions of the phrase have both a boastful engineering and an element of fantasy.

Between the 6 big passages are six or so sequences where Jmy and Perin flatten themselves to the floor. Sometimes they wriggle on their backs up and down the corridor like eels, or kick their legs up in a slow motion jog but mostly what these events on the floor feel like is a brief respite into an image. Most of this dance does not allow images to be apprehended and stabilized because the proximity of their bodies blurred our vision and the staggered, refracted score keep us constantly shifting gaze from one dancer to another, enthralled in the procedure.

CONCLUSION: A dance practice is an ongoing research into the possibility that movement produces its own, sometimes prelinguistic meanings. The intensity of discovery, association and affect are greatest in the studio and the public showing is a glance down a well into the depths of an ongoing exploration. When dancers, and other artists who use movement in their work witness dance, they hunt for information to absorb into their creative process. Since artists of all stripes comprise the majority of the public that witness dance in spaces like Pieter, and PAM the performed practice is as materially important in reading a live work as the costume, language, sound and extraneous media. The “how” is therefore also the “what”.

END

Tag from Jmy:

Brian Getnick is PAM. PAM is residencies. Residencies are people. Brian makes puppet sculpture beings that are meant to be touched, grabbed, cuddled, tossed because they want to be alive. 

Brian Getnick is an artist, curator and writer about contemporary performance in Los Angeles. He is the director of PAM Residencies, a showcase and residency program for performers making long form work (30+ minutes). He is the founder and co-director with Tanya Rubbak of Native Strategies, a journal documenting performance art in LA since 2011.

Anastasia Baratta on Body Bags

Contemplation of containers, ephemeral nature of such a capsule meant to hold something temporarily. Reminder that most things must be held, suspended within something else.  

Beyond that, is there....there?  

I think about these bags…the holder of things precious or not, kept safe or instead, cast away.  

I used to put people in rich leather body bags. I would zip them up and reinforce it with ties, ropes and belts. They were captive and at my mercy. A package of flesh within flesh, waiting for connection.  

Now, I contemplate the bags we live in such as the skin bag, the muscle bag or the ultimate fascia bag, that encompasses the corporeal and possibly the essence of us. The body bag we carry is maybe just a vessel to contain the spirit on this temporal plane. A package of flesh within flesh waiting for connection.  

These highly organized bags that contain us and at times distort us. When I move my body bags, it can feel cumbersome or exuberant. My gut bag, my bone bag, my mind bag…is that your bag?  

Sometimes, its all I can do to get my bag out of bed and other times the bag carries me in swirls and twirls and laughter. It’s just a bag to be eventually discarded…and when I die, I want to be put in a mushroom shroud bag into the soil bag and then maybe, free of containers. 

Tag from Jmy:

My friend and pilates teacher Anastasia Baratta says she was a dancer in a past life. "Pilates" is just a container for the work she does. for me she senses the beyond of bodies. Her work is a huge influence in the organization of my Now body (bag). I make dances and live with and within this body which I inhabit. "Body Bags" is a regurgitation of the things I put in it, like other people and their questions and ideas. I am a subjective creature.

Anastasia Baratta is a self defined body geek, movement coach and witch. Her background is in Education and has multiple certifications in various modalities of movement and healing. She lives in LA and philosophizes about bodies, life, death and healing more than most.

Body Bags by Jmy James Kidd happened at PAM Residencies on April 12 & 13, 2018.

Body Bags was performed by Jmy James Kidd, Perin Hailey McNelis, and Tara Jane O’Neil.

Jmy James Kidd (b. San Francisco, CA) designs dances and clothing and makes watercolors. Her dance history includes ballet and RUG Cunningham technique. Over the last decade she has developed a healthful studio practice with a spiritual body in Los Angeles, where she founded the nonprofit dance studio Pieter as a response to her repressive dance training.

Perin Hailey McNelis is a dancer and restoration horticulturist based in Patagonia, AZ. She holds a BFA in dance from NYU’s Tisch School of the Arts and her work has been presented by the Fourth Arts Block’s FAB Festival (NYC), Machine Project, Home LA and Pieter.

Tara Jane O’Neil is a musician. Since 1992 she has released 9 solo albums and collaborated with musicians, dancers, filmmakers and artists. She performs in rock clubs, festivals, DIY spaces, museums, and wilderness areas. Her visual art hangs on walls and sits in stacks or bookshelves. She makes salve.

Film stills from footage shot by Angel Alvarado.

[tipsycad147]

How to make your own chakra stone set

Posted by Michelle Gruben on May 25, 2017

A chakra stone set is a small collection of gemstones, in which each stone corresponds to one of the body's subtle energy centres. You've probably seen them for sale in metaphysical shops and online.

Chakra stones are used in energy healing and meditation. Witches and Pagans may also use them for spellwork or divination. To the well-practised crystal user, a chakra set is like a painter's palette. Handling the chakra stones allows the practitioner to focus on a particular vibration (or "colour" of energy), quickly accessing it to achieve his or her aims.

Making your own chakra set is an easy and fun exercise, even for crystal beginners. It's a way to create personalised tool for healing and contemplation. As you assemble your chakra set, you'll learn lots about the various stones and their energetic properties.

In this article, we'll look at how to put together your own set of chakra gemstones. We'll also share some instructions for getting your chakra stones ready to use.

The Colour Method

The concept of chakras, or psychic energy centres, originated in ancient India and is part of the discipline of Yoga. But Western magick workers have thoroughly adopted the chakra system, thanks in large part to New Age writers in the 1970s and 1980s. The most widely-read book on chakras is probably Wheels of Life, which has sold over 200,000 copies since it was published in 1987.

In New Age thought, there are usually seven chakras. Each chakra corresponds to a different colour on the spectrum, with red at the base or Root Chakra, and violet (or white) at the top of the head. The colours represent different frequencies of vibration, from low to high. The idea of a "rainbow" of chakras has been so influential that it shows up in most modern writings on psychic energy.

Making Your Set

While not everyone agrees whether the colours of the chakras are literally true, the rainbow is indeed a handy metaphor for different types of energy. So we'll use the rainbow concept to help put together our bag of chakra stones. (Bonus: Choosing by colour helps you remember which stone goes with which chakra.) We'll also stick with the usual seven chakra system—though you may feel free to adapt your kit to a system with more or fewer chakras.

One more note: For each chakra, I've included a list of suggested crystals or stones. Choose your favourite stone from each category, and end up with a chakra set that's truly unique.

Tumbled gemstones are the most popular for chakra kits, because they're relatively inexpensive and hold up the best to being handled. But crystals can be found in all sizes and shapes. Crystal spheres, wands, discs, pyramids, jewellery, uncut rough stones—any of these can be assembled into chakra sets.

I've tried to balance rare and expensive gemstones with ones that are readily available at most crystal shops. (A few stones appear in more than one list. Choose the attribution you feel is most appropriate.)

Root Chakra

Associated with the colour Red, the Root Chakra sits at the base of the spine.  It allows one to connect with Earth energy, and is strongly linked to instinct, survival, and the physical body. Many Root Chakra stones, like Red Jasper and Hematite, contain a high concentration of iron.

Just about any red or earth-coloured stone can represent the Root Chakra in your kit. Black gemstones—often associated with protection—are also suitable Root Chakra stones.

Suggested stones for the Root Chakra: Red Jasper, Hematite, Garnet, Black Tourmaline, Obsidian, Mahogany Obsidian, Ruby, Red Tiger's Eye.

Sacral Chakra

The Sacral Chakra is located near the navel, lower back, and sexual organs. Its colour is Orange and it governs passion, pleasure, and creative force.

Since the Sacral Chakra rules appetites, look for stones in bright, mouth-watering colours and pleasing textures. Our favourite Sacral Chakra crystal has got to be Carnelian—a vibrant red-orange gem whose name means "fleshy."

Suggested stones for the Sacral Chakra: Carnelian, Amber, Pink Moonstone, Citrine, Orange Calcite, Sunstone, Gold Sandstone.

Solar Plexus Chakra

Located in the middle of the body (just below the rib cage) the Solar Plexus Chakra is the centre of personal power. Strength, charisma, confidence, and willpower are attributes that it controls. It's linked to the colour Yellow. When shopping for Solar Plexus stones, look for a yellow-gold colour, and/or stones with sparkles and rays.

Suggested stones for the Sacral Chakra: Tiger's Eye, Citrine, Yellow Calcite, Ametrine, Rutilated Quartz, Yellow Aventurine, Yellow Jasper, Yellow Sapphire.

Heart Chakra

The Heart Chakra allows one to experience love, generosity and empathy. Its main functions are processing emotions and connecting with others' energy.

Green is the colour usually assigned to the Heart Chakra, and there are many, many green stones that are excellent for Heart Chakra work. But some stones on the list are pink or mixed colours. Not to worry. Remember: The earliest texts on pranic energy don't mention chakra colours, so it is likely that chakras of yogic and tantric traditions were colourless. Pick a stone that screams "heart energy" to you, regardless of the colour.

Suggested stones for the Heart Chakra: Green Aventurine, Jade, Emerald, Rose Quartz, Pink Sapphire, Peridot, Unakite, Green Calcite, Green Fluorite, Rhodonite, Malachite, Chrysocolla.

Throat Chakra

The Throat Chakra is linked to colour Blue, and it governs communication, self-expression, and truth. Situated between the head and the heart, it helps to mediate between thought and emotion. It's no big surprise that most of the stones on this list are in shades of blue.

Suggested stones for the Throat Chakra: Sodalite, Lapis Lazuli, Blue Kyanite, Blue Tiger's Eye, Blue Goldstone, Amazonite, Turquoise, Blue Apatite.

Brow Chakra

Also called the "third eye," the Brow Chakra is located just above the eyes, between the eyebrows. Its colour is Purple, and visualisation, dreaming, and intuition are some of its functions. Working with the Brow Chakra helps to awaken psychic gifts (and perception in general).

When choosing crystals that vibrate with the Brow Chakra, deep blue or violet stones are recommended. Stones with iridescence or moving patterns are also very stimulating to the light-sensitive third eye.

Suggested gemstones for the Brow Chakra: Amethyst, Lapis Lazuli, Purple (or Rainbow) Fluorite, Shungite, Labradorite, Moonstone, Opal, Kyanite.

Crown Chakra

Located just above the head, the Crown Chakra is the body's link with celestial and/or Divine energy. Just as White combines all the colours of the rainbow, a fully-functioning Crown Chakra blends all of body's diverse energies into a unified being.

Crown Chakra gemstones tend to be clear or white in colour. They are though to be the stones with the highest and purest vibrations.

Suggested gemstones for the Crown Chakra: Clear Quartz, White Moonstone, Opalite, Selenite, Angelite, White Sapphire, Apophylite, Milky Quartz, Celestite, Moldavite.

Putting it all together

Pretty soon, you should have collected seven (or five or nine or ten) stones to go in your chakra set.

If one of the stones doesn't feel right, or doesn't appear to be playing nice with the others, then kick it to the curb. (I mean, gratefully place it somewhere to be re-purposed.) Keep shuffling rocks around until you have a set that represents the chakras to you.

Next, you'll want a home for your stones. A dedicated bag or box keeps the set from accumulating physical and psychic dust when not in use.

Depending on what stones you've picked out, some of them may need to be stored separately from the rest. Softer materials can pick up dings and scratches from their pokier neighbours. Selenite and Fluorite, for instance, are fragile divas. To avoid the problem, choose gems that are close on the Mohs scale. Or, work out a way to keep them in separate bags or compartments.

Finally, as with any magickal tool, it's a good idea to cleanse and bless your chakra stones. Use your favourite crystal cleansing method. There are several effective methods: Smudging, sunlight or moonlight, water (if it won't harm the stones you've chosen), other crystals, visualisation, and breath. Set your intention that these stones will be your partner on your journey of learning and healing.

Attuning chakra stones

If you like, you can follow the cleansing process with an attunement exercise. This is definitely recommend if you've made the chakra set for your own personal practice. Basically, attuning your stones allows each one to get acquainted with the energy centre it's going to represent.

To attune your chakra set, dim the lights, light some candles or incense--whatever helps you get into a meditative state. Take a few deep breaths and let go of any energy build-ups or distracting thoughts.

Starting with your Root Chakra stone, place each stone in turn over the chakra that it corresponds to. You will be adding the stones one by one, until you're "wearing" all of them. (Unless you have a lot of hands, the easiest way to do this is lying on your back.)

You can use a diagram of the chakras to help you place the stones—but remember chakras can be in slightly different places on different individuals. You will know the first stone is placed correctly by its feel. Some people experience the feeling as equilibrium, or heaviness, or a light tingling vibration. I like to describe it has a ball settling into a hole in the ground—once it's in the right place, it tends to stay comfortably settled.

Once the stone is placed on the chakra, gather some of the energy in that chakra and send a little pulse outward. This is similar to directing energy with your hands, but the energy starts in and exits directly from the chakra centre. It may take the form of a beam, or a ball, or small petals of energy reaching outward.

Wait for a reply. You may feel the stone either absorbing the energy or reflecting it back to you (or a little of both, or nothing at all.) Take another breath, and try it again. Let the stone and the energy of your body "talk" until they feel as if they are in harmony. Do this until the stone can't possibly accept any more energy, or you sense that the dialogue has stopped.

Leaving the Root Chakra stone in place if possible, move on to the Sacral Chakra. Repeat the stone-charging process. Though you will be focusing on attuning only one stone at a time, you will have a gentle awareness of all the tones you have charged so far. Remove the stones in the reverse order, starting with the Crown Chakra and working down to the Root Chakra.

To check your work, put the chakra stones in a bag or on a table and gently run your receptive hand over them. Do you feel a difference in energy between the stones? Some may feel warmer or cooler than the others, or appear to vibrate faster or slower. (That's good!) If you did an exceptional job of attuning the stones to your body, you may even feel sensation in one of your chakras when holding the matching stone.

Your chakra set is now ready for energetic healing, divination, and meditating on the chakras. Chakra stones may need to be cleansed and re-attuned periodically to keep them working their best.

https://www.groveandgrotto.com/blogs/articles/making-a-chakra-stone-set