#I want to put the past behind me
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My page for @kairizine. It was such a huge honor to be part of this wonderful book with everyone, I had so much fun!
[id in alt!]
#kingdom hearts#kh#kh kairi#kh xion#kh namine#i don't really feel proud of my own stuff usually but#i really think this is the drawing i'm most proud of from this past year!! it made me think 'oh maybe i can draw' haha#i'm still kinda bad with colors but something clicked with this one. and i feel like i got the sentimental feeling i wanted!#ooh but this project's about flower symbolism so ramble incoming:#protea symbolizes resilience transformation and diversity; hollyhock means 'please remember me.'#so my general theme was finding a sense of self.#these 3 have struggled with finding their own identity; they tend to get left behind both in-universe and in general plotwise#and naminé and xion both resemble kairi and were overshadowed by her memory. but i feel like all 3 have transformed into their own people#xion and naminé have their faces covered partially by hollyhock to show their wish to be remembered for who they are-#instead of the parts that they share with someone else#and the protea bouquets show how they each held on and resiliently grew into their own person despite it all#i put a little swervy path on the hill behind kairi to give that hopeful sense of growth and moving forward. it's a little hard to see#hopefully that makes sense! i really love symbolism but i think in visuals so i'm really bad with words#but gosh working with everyone on this project was so fun. it was like impossible not to get swept up by the team's hype for this zine#i need to hunt down everybody's work and rb it#ohh and everybody's flowers are so crisply drawn it's insane!! i think if i lined all these flowers and leaves i'd die haha#fan art#my art#project stuff
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Tumblr already showed me twice a post where OP implies that Bruce made the choice to not help Jaybin when he was attacked by an angry mob in Legends, so I had to check, and look at that, they were lying.
Context: the general population has been turned against superheroes.
An angry mob does attack Robin, and what is Batman's reaction? To come to the rescue! He even immediately calls him "son", switching to an endearing term to reassure him. However, Batman is hit in the eyes with a bottle of perfume and blinded, as his attention was on his boy. Gordon tries to get him to leave, but he refuses because he can't leave his boy behind, and when Gordon tells him that his men will take care of Robin, Batman is like "I don't trust your men with my son". Batman is forced out of here, he is so pissef, and he is called "arrogant" by the cops there.
This man trusts ONE cop, and it's Jim Gordon, that's it. And people dare to tell me Bruce isn't an acab believer. He grew up in Gotham and his parents were murdered when he was 8, of course he believes in acab. That's why he was so against his son becoming one.
Anyway, later on, Jason is in the hospital (Bruce was right, Gordon's men didn't do shit), and Bruce is pissed at the situation. However, Jason feels guilty and ashamed, and Bruce immediately goes to comfort him, reminding him he isn't at fault for getting beat up, that Bruce is proud of him and that he is a great Robin. And when Jason compares himself to Dick, Bruce stops that too, bringing up that Dick also had less glorious moments like this. And again, Bruce switches to "son" and "Jay", which convey affection in the goal of comforting his boy.
In the end, Bruce leaves his son safe at the hospital, resolved to not obey the president and get to the bottom of this. Later, Jason decides he cannot stay there and must help, even if it kills him. And people dare say that he wasn't reckless.
Anyway, the other thing about this, apart from Bruce didn't walk away WILLINGLY from Jason being attacked by an angry mob, is that as awful this is, the writers never intended this to be a traumatic experience for Jason. Of course, it would be normally, but it's just a plot point here to get Robin away from Batman while he works with the other heroes. Damn, there isn't even a follow-up to Jason leaving the hospital, he doesn't show up in the next issues to help.
Sometimes, especially with older stories, comics' events don't matter as much as you think they do. If you want to re-imagine them as impacting for the characters, that's your choice, but let's not act as if they were intended to be. Because I saw that moment being used as a comparison to Under The Red Hood, to be like "see Bruce keeps abandoning Jason", and like, calm down with the shortcuts. Because you are making that up, on your own, with what was given to you by different writers over the decades that didn't communicate with each others or agree on the characters.
#bruce wayne#batman#jason todd#robin#dc comics#my ramblings#a pet peeves of mine in this fandom is how people cannot understand that the writers' intentions are and how they matter#like they blame everything on the character as if they are a constant and/or make their own decisions#they are people behind the media you consume think about them for two seconds#I'm tired of posts bashing Bruce for saying or doing something that could easily be put on the writers#like Bruce yelling at Damian for skipping patrols to help at the hospital as if Bruce hasn't shown time and time again#that he wants those kids to stay safe more than anything and if they don't want to be vigilantes that's great#But no let's bash Bruce instead of the PEOPLE WRITING HIM#they want conflicts so they create conflicts and the bigger picture doesn't matter but it exists#I don't feel like I explained myself well words are so hard#op had already blocked me anyway probably because I criticized Jason in the past
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he just wanted to be a farmer :C
#hermitaday#hermitblr#vintagebeef#vintagebeef fanart#my art#i dont talk abt him much on here but i rlly do love beef#poor guy who desperately wants to leave his dark days behind but keeps getting roped into being a mafia boss#nho are just various different degrees of trying to put the past behind to me and all of them are rlly funny#anyways i think beef should be allowed to hit pause with chairs#cw blood
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Jaiden: Cucurucho, you have a lot of power, right?
Cucurucho: ...I don't know. Maybe.
Roier: Ah... Yes, you know, don't act like a dumbass, you have it. You have it, man. Eh?
Jaiden: Is there a way for us to protect all the Eggs? Do you know? I don't want anything to happen to the Eggs that happened to Bobby.
Cucurucho: Ha ha ha
Roier: WHAT? [Smacks Cucurucho]
Jaiden: [Bops him] Headpats.
Cucurucho: Maybe.
Jaiden: [Continues to bop him] Headpats. C'mon, I can get it out of you! Headpats! Chin scratches! Belly rubs!
Roier: [Joins Jaiden in bopping Cucurucho, chuckling and laughs]
Jaiden: Yeah? He's comin' around!
[Jaiden and Roier both laugh]
#Jaiden Animations#Roier#Cucurucho#QSMP#Jaiden#Animations Family#There is. So much I could say about these three#and so much I could say about their relationship / interactions with Cucurucho and Osito Bimbo#Cards on the table... I really would have loved it if Cucurucho / Osito genuinely cared about Jaiden#I mean I know they DID care about her to some extent that much is clear#But they / the Federation were also ABSOLUTELY using her. I'm not arguing that they weren't#But how could anyone not be charmed by Jaiden? The boba the tea parties the head pats–#The empathy and kindness and everything that made q!Jaiden who she was–#Cucurucho and Osito were tools of the Federation but I do want to believe they cared about Jaiden. Albeit in their own fricked up way#I dunno. I know this sounds like massive copium probably but I watched all of her and Roier's streams interacting with them#and I personally think that conflict and duality makes for a more interesting story#But that's just me and my own personal biases. I dunno how to properly put it into words but I am cradling them all close to my heart#I loved Cucurucho / Osito and I thought they were interesting and I'm SO SAD we'll never know what Jaiden did for them in the past#Anyways. For anyone who's read this far into my rant– you know how Cucurucho saved the Eggs and Jaiden said she died in Purgatory?#I like imagining that she survived the bomb and wound up finding the Eggs in the aftermath#and she helped them survive until Cucurucho found them#I imagine that Jaiden was the reason they were able to escape from the Island / The Watcher / ElQuackity#She stayed behind to slow down their pursuers. And Cucurucho rescuing all the Eggs fulfilled his agreement with Jaiden—#A promise to protect the Eggs#Like I said a lot of this is copium but that's what I like imagining#TLDR: Cucurucho / Osito did care about her in a weird way but that doesn't mean they weren't manipulating her#May 31 2023#Idk man I got a lot of emotions about q!Jaiden#Roier too but I feel like I've done way more analysis posts about him and Cucurucho. Jaiden needs time in the spotlight#Anyways there's my monthly tag rant
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It’s really interesting to me how elusive Kipperlily Copperkettle has been throughout what is now the first half of the season.
She’s the closest thing we have to an identifiable Big Bad. She gets established in episode 3 to be constantly vigilant, capable of eavesdropping on anything and everything.
And then she’s physically MIA (iirc) for seven episodes, barring her scene with the food trucks at the start of episode 7. I think she’s said to be present at the assembly this most recent episode (ep 10) but she doesn’t appear to be an active participant in anything. That inaction is eating away at me… bc I know she’s doing something.
Talk about haunting a narrative… I’m constantly aware of her nonexistence. I’m paranoid. With every episode that we don’t hear from or interact with KLCK, she grows more terrifying to me. Brennan made sure to establish right away that she could be listening at literally any point. Riz tried to keep that at the forefront of his mind initially, but even he let that idea fall to the wayside as stress built up and time passed.
I think we’ve settled into a false sense of security in this respect. I think that at any point Brennan can and will drop a KLCK bomb on us and oh boy it’s gonna be deliciously messy.
#dimension 20#fantasy high#fantasy high junior year#fhjy#kipperlilly copperkettle#brennan lee mulligan#fhjy spoilers#fantasy high spoilers#I didn’t even mention that Aylwen is somehow working for her???#KLCK is clearly pulling threads behind the scenes and I can’t tell how or to what extent and it’s fascinating#yknow that idea that like if someone went back in time to change the past no one would notice bc to them that’s just how it is?#it’s like that to me. she could just a That Bitch at school or she could be the Mastermind behind the curtain and I Don’t Know Which!!!!!#she fascinates me#I want to put specifically her character’s influence under a microscope
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of where [ ] [ ] used to be
#Library of Ruina#Roland Library of Ruina#... would this count as spoilers. it is rather vauge. uhm. just in case?#library of ruina spoilers#i couldnt find adequate words to fully capture the ache and sheer void loss leaves behind. of what isnt There. thats short at least#so... i left i blank? because the mind would fill it. fill it with Multiple things than just one word i could place. for it is Multiple#aspects. stripped away.#of where my light used to be. my love. my heart. my 'self'. my Life. my dreams. my hopes. my dear. my everything#her warmth. her touch. her laugh. her strength. her face#void of where ones heart used to be. whos heart is cold as ice (haha snow queen). tomorrows seen as gone the moment that light was stripped#away from the heart. the Home. the room that used to be a home. the room that was going to be a home. scattered with small yellows in the#corner that only serve to spiral further into memories and moments of the past cruely and coldly torn awah#ahh glad i put the spoiler tag? yappin. anyways ive only completed realizations for middle but. uhm. erm...#iireally realt wanted to draw. for it#roland lor#i think thats the other tag. just in case for more navigation#i fet distinctly Empty when it happened. when reading. when seeing. when Hearing. i wanted to make something that sorta had that#also his mask looked like a void. left an impression on me
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You know what, I expected that they would have Chloe not mention Chad at all. We already know they do not care about continuity.
But I'm going to tell you my problem with not having Chloe mentioning Chad.
Just throwing it out there, it's not that the fandom really cares about Chad like that. I don't really care about Chad like that. (They could have done better with his writing. As for a lot of other characters.)
It's not that the fandom is like "oh, how dare they take away our favorite white boy". It's not that. No, scratch that. It's part of this following reason.
It's that the OG VKs and AKs were done dirty before and it continues. Oh, but it's not just that. See, them leaving most of them out is an "excuse" for something else that I'll talk about later.
Just follow with me here.
Not too long ago they released the Red version of Uma's song, What's My Name. In the song there is this part...
This is Red's part, just so we're clear. They had her make remarks that the VKs are "middle-aged". Mind you while on a song belonging to UMA. The VKs would just be reaching their 20s at this time. Just their 20s!! If you're including Celia, Dizzy and the Smee Twins as VKs (because technically they are) they would probably still be in school.
What's makes this part worse is the "cradle to the grave" lyrics. The songwriters obviously were not thinking when they put that in. They didn't register what fans might they think when hearing those lyrics. Do I have to say it? Like, really think about it.
With this part of the song and no mention of Chad in Chloe's video, it's them saying "well, it's not like the AKs and rest of the VKs are important anyways!"
That's the problem right there. And that's a problem that leads into a bigger problem.
Let's think about the Sea Three. It's like they're already trying to replace them with Uliana, Hook and Morgie.
"But Uma is there!" They knew damn well that Uma would bring in more fans to watch that movie. Uma is a beloved character, why wouldn't they include her? It's the same reason Brandy and Paolo are back playing as Cinderella and Charming.
See, Disney will market off Black and other people of color. They'll be like "oh, we can give this character this, but not this". They can have some good traits, but they still have to get some bad. (Example, Tiana could be a princess!! But she had to spend most of her movie as a damn frog!)
Let me start with Uliana.
What sucks about Uliana and her crew to me is that it seems this time they really want fans to hate on a Black girl... again.
See, I bet in 2017 they didn't anticipate on fans adoring Uma and actually sympathizing with her. And it helps that China is a damn good actress and singer.
They made Uma the "big bad" in the second movie, continuing the "let's make the Black girls and women antagonistic" (Audrey, being played by Sarah Jeffery who is half Black, being mean to Mal and Cruella being played by a Black woman, Wendy Raquel Robinson).
Again, though, that shit didn't work so they're trying it again.
Don't believe me?
Here's the thing. If they wanted Bridget to have this sad backstory who was bullied... why did they make it a Black girl? And why is this character just so happen to be Uma's aunt and Ursula's sister? They couldn't have made another villain character be her bully? To be the reason as to why Bridget aka Queen of Hearts hates Cinderella? In fact, how about Maleficent? She's right there!!
From the looks of the trailer, it may be Uliana did something that made Bridget hate Cinderella. So they couldn't have Maleficent be manipulative and do that then? Why come up with a whole original character related to one of the most other notorious Disney villains (who is Black in the Descendants universe, by the way, Whoopi Goldberg) for just that? Hm?
No, Disney said "let's make trick the fans, make them think that Dara will be playing a sweet, innocent princess and then reveal she'll be playing this bully who we made up".
See, they couldn't use Morgana from the second Little Mermaid movie because one, there's her name. We have Morgie in the movie and his mother's name is Morgana. Two, when the first Descendants movie came out, Disney made it a point to make it seem that the first films of the animated films were canon. Meaning that, yeah, sequels were ignored.
In the case of Chloe and Chad!
As I mentioned before, it comes off that the AKs and VKs are being brushed aside. And yes, it's a problem.
The problem isn't having a new generation. I personally am not upset seeing these new characters, let alone new actors. I hate how they (not the actors, not them) went about this.
They could have easily announced Malia Baker playing Chloe from the start. But no, they didn't do that. On top of that, no mention of Chad??
Disney didn't have Chloe mention Chad because they want to play off him being an OG AK and white and have the fandom feel some kind of way towards Chloe who is of color. They want people to be antagonistic towards and annoyed at Chloe. See, they let this Black girl be a princess... but they'll probably have her be annoying in the movie, some perfectionist, oh and no mention of her supposed brother.
When you think about it... while Uilanna is the Uma here, Chloe is the Audrey.
Hm, a girly princess who wears blue, who is the daughter of a beloved Disney princess whose race was changed for the Descendants, played by an actress who looks racially ambiguous but happens to be Black, who has some connection to Chad (or lack of), who also comes off as some perfectionist, an often annoying character trait.
Now, don't that seem like Chloe is the Audrey here? Just this time, our princess is nicer.
Like with Uma, Audrey was meant to be disliked, but come the third movie fans grew to like and sympathize her.
This time around with Chloe, it's like Disney is trying to be sneakier about getting the fans to hate her.
Again, it's the "they can have this but they can't have this" with their Black and other characters of color.
"It's not about race." Disney made it about race. If it wasn't, they wouldn't have done previous antics with the other characters. If wasn't, Disney would have easily kept Cinderella and her family white from the animated films, if they still wanted fans to dislike her, just as they could have with Aurora and her family, but they didn't. They made fans believe Dara was going to play a princess and just knew fans would be like "Brandy could be Cinderella" because of that, and once they had Brandy be Cinderella? Well, you see what happened.
Simply, just my opinion, Disney has the intentions to make Chloe hated or at least less popular. They're just not trying make it not racist, but still still are racist about.
Now, I'm not saying the movie is going to be oh so terrible. The thing is, a fourth movie could have been a more excitable thing for fans if Disney stopped doing most of these characters dirty with their racism and favoritism.
#may be a reach but given the past with these movies??#i already want to put chloe behind a shield#that's just how i feel and if you disagree alright then fine#i don't care but this is just me don't care to argue with anybody#truly i think it's unfair to chloe and her actress#just kiya's thoughts#descendants#disney descendants#descendants rise of red#the rise of red#chloe charming
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Kit do you not rep Charles anymore 😭
Of course I do he’s prime I just need a break from his team and that fucking dog
#ask#binottos gone. his bones are gone. sainz on his way out. the evil has been DEFEATED#we did it. we found everything that was wrong wid Ferrari and put it in a box and sent it far far away where it cant hurt us anymore#finally a clean slate for elkann and a blank cheque for vasseur to rebuild il cavallino the way enzo wanted. pure italian excellence#and a semi italian boy to lead it all. vasseur FINALLY recognizes leclercs potential as n1 and turns him into the central piece of a new er#they get him hamilton. biggest media event in f1 history#a proven winner. an upgrade in every way. bigger than ferrari? that wont be a question he'll need to answer#binotto is bones. f1-75 is dust. next year sainz will be nothing but a bad memory and the rusting crux of all their PAST problems#this is vasseurs vision now. his holy plan. his sf-24. his personnel. wid elkanns blessings and his deep. deep pockets.#2 years later. the monster's gone. vasseur is here.#and what has vasseur done?#the garages remain the same. no big poaches from rivals. nothing to prepare for hamiltons arrival.#maranello follows a dev path that comes from the same wind tunnel as haas. haas' data correlates. their upgrades work. ferrari's dont.#last 2 upgrades failed because the very concept of the car was wrong. 2 months behind at least.#((took merc almost 2 and a half years to deal wid the damage of an incorrect baseline and correct course))#ferrari came into the triple header 2nd in the standings and left wid 50 points TOTAL. baby mclarens-first-wcc run behind by 7#out of those 50 points none was sharls#sharl has scored 1 point in 4 fucking races#vasseur's ferrari has turned a generational qualifier into a kid whose idea of making pole is running experiments in q3#because who cares anyway if the car is setup for races except it aint setup for that shit either#so quali has to work ((it doesnt)) sunday has to be flawless ((never is)) but to point fingers is a worse crime than this approach to gp's#last gp. silverstone. as representative as it gets. sharl fails to make q3#bouncing around in a setup that hadnt been previously tested on either fp but wud surely make it worth their sunday#sunday: sharl gets lapped#ik sharl better than this#but idk what im looking at rn#I ignored the influencer milestone special helmet because I expected a performance that wud make me forget it#I need him to be a racing driver#he says 'he cant find the words anymore' bro I rlly need him to find them#I'll always ALWAYS root for sharl but to keep it 💯 idk what I'm rooting for anymore
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a few Carlos moments from the 2024 Azerbaijan GP
#carlos sainz#charles leclerc#autumn posts#so many insta moments saved!! and most this quality hehe#not HQ but still I fawn!!#the middle especially AHHH his lap 😵💫 ok!!!!#hoping to do this more to share what I have in the backlog that I haven't seen here yet tho totally could've missed someone posting these!!!#I know I talk about it a lot in the tags but ahhhh I'm usually at work 🙃 kinda have a super unbalanced relationship with my job#but it means I'm usually so behind on the dash and there are so many incredible fics I cannot wait to read!!!!!#so many things I miss#thank you everyone for sharing what you create ❤️#and thank you for your patience with me as I catch up!!!#like literally no one is putting pressure on me haha but I do it too much to myself!!#always feeling like I'm running behind but I know that's not how fandom works!!#it's wonderful to pop in and share whenever feels best!!#anyways tl;dr I'm hoping to catch up more soon and just hella thankful for all the kindness here ❤️#I worry way too much (as evident!!) and slowly finding balance where I can have more time to do what I love in life#anyways it means a lot to ramble here!!#I'm a single pringle usually alone in my office or the apartment (except blessed weekends with friends! and stressful work events hehe)#so having this space means so much to me!! and to all the online spaces where it can feel like a little respite#and there is still so much to see!! (I've not even seen dts or Carlos and Daniel's vlogs like!!!! woah!!!! so much!!! 😵💫 but also 🥳)#I've only seen a few of the Don't Blink episodes!! and some races from the past so far!!#and cannot wait to be yelling over fics soon omg the premises I've seen!!!!! AHHHHHH I always want to comment so you'll be hearing from me!!#but now back to work (for just a little longer!!)#hoping everyone is well ❤️ and hope you have a restful evening morning and afternoon too!! 🌃🌇🏙️❤️
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(face in hands) (again) men will simply feel the walls closing in around them
#my brother got covid from hanging out with his boyfriend. again.#and by the sounds of it they want to quarantine at our house.#ih his room which is. you know. directly adjacent to my room.#aaaaa and we have a trip coming up in two weeks and then my job starts in full and just#if he comes here i’m literally leaving to go stay at my partner’s instead#but it’s killing me because i’ll have to leave my pc and tablet behind and just#aaaaaaa i feel stressed i feel stressed#i’ve been in an exhausted fog for the past two weeks and it feels like i can’t get anything done#it’s like time has just been slipping by me and it makes me So So Upset#like what do you mean we’re more than halfway through august!!!!#and yet also: FUCK!!!!! I TOTTED THROUGH AUGUST!!!!!#i’m coming dangerously close to feeling the way i did during spring semester#when my brain is craving a release like crack cocaine but it’s not coming#every other day i’m dealing with work crap and hassling with irl things#and when i’m not doing that i’m rotting at my desk fatigued out of my mind#trying my best not to pass out until 9pm when it’s reasonable to do so#just staring at whatever video i can put on and blaring it loudly so i don’t fall asleep#aaaaa…………..i want out of this………. i’m on my break and yet i still want out aaaaaa……..
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#ive been thinking about myself being aroace but also dating and other stuff#like i want to date#but ive had such bad experience with men / creeps in the past and i dont even know how to go about it#everyone around me is all married / in relationships / engaged etc#and i feel like im behind#ive even tried tinder to kind of put myself out there? but i dont know how i feel about that#or what dating sites are safe#or ones you dont have to pay ridiculous amount of money#like it doesnt even have to be sexual...it would just be nice to have a hand to hold#im certainly aroace but maybe on the grey scale#idk...#maybe im just destined to be alone lmao#aroace#personal stuff#about me
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I've gone so far down the kazui mukuhara rabbit hole that I'll listen to any fucking song ever and it'll still remind me of him. FOR EXAMPLE
DO YOU SEE MY VISION....
#like yk the way he wears a mask for the majority of half and the mask is meant to represent his lies and like hiding his true self#yk like putting on a mask becoming someone else on stage actor shit yada yada#SO LIKE. “i know you've been hiding secrets in your past” and kazui mentions thoughts on his mind that he “gave up A LONG TIME AGO”#“whats behind the mask” like asking him to tell the truth and !!! be his true self !! to stop acting !!!#AND THEN LIKE... “curiosity killed this cat/sorry i ever asked” because kazui talks about how hinako would still be alive if he kept lying#it just . reminds me of him#ALOT#and i wasnt expecting it man i was just doing my sphe cba#i cant listen to music normally anymore and its all milgrams fault#milgram#kazui mukuhara#sorry for the ramble im procrastinating having a shower and going to sleep and i also just wanted to share this. discovery#Spotify
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Hey bestie, no need to answer this, but I saw u reblogged something from roach - works, and I just wanna let u know that she's a major terf
oh!!! thank you for this fr. i'm answering this bc i just wanna say that i don't have shinigami eyes and i'm on mobile most of the time, so these pointers are much appreciated <33
#preemptive soury for the rant. guess my meds finally kicked tf in. and im at my computer so keyboard access vvv#caveat i WILL say that i have a sideblog that specifically reblogs terf-specific rhetoric but it is an archival blog for research purposes#archival bc in the past i've been looking at blogs that end up being deactivated or change to a name i dont know#and research bc i've been interested in understanding the sociology/psychology behind it for a while and how other bases of discrimination#(eg acephobia and anti-pornography) tie into their sets of beliefs. as well as having the privilege of a strong foundational academic#background in these topics that i am perfectly capable of disputing each argument point if need be#this also provides me with a set of dogwhistles that may not be as obvious to the larger tumblr population (eg i have a strong suspicion#that 'natal female' is a dogwhistle in the context of academia. yes this comes from reading actually published articles. if that sounds#familiar to anyone. yes this is heavily rooted in that one that tries to propose 'rapid onset' gender dysphoria but used an insanely biased#sampling population for their statistics. which was the basis of the entire paper. i want to ask how some of this shit even gets published.#but then like. there's the AI rat penis so. anyways)#saying this bc i occasionally DO have anxiety that i will accidentally reblog something to the wrong blog. and it's moreso the concern of#not wanting to spread misinformation and bigotry without a critical deconstruction behind its rationale.#that sideblog is there and tucked away for storage purposes only. please let me know if ive accidentally reblogged smth to this blog#ask#Anonymous#edit damn wtf. i dont even follow them whhh. tumblr's GOTTA stop just. randomly putting shit on my dash. god
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AGENDA:
enter hellsite app with sole purpose
ignore dash/feed in case it triggers some weird stuff
immediately go to profile
click on palette button to edit profile
erase description cause it was cringe anyway
update my age to correspond as I did with every other social media profile of mine just minutes ago
post this post for whatever reason, only on this hellsite also for whatever reason
leave hellsite app, probably never to return for the next few months
X
#personal#happy birthday to me i guess#22 years of my mother telling me to my face I'm her greatest regret#her extra luggage that's too heavy#her child born from her past sins#born on the winter solstice#the darkest night of the year#after i almost died in utero#and I'm here now with a brain that will never be normal#with my mother still telling me what to wear and why i can't sing out loud in the house#and with a blissfully ignorant younger sister to protect#and a father who might put me in danger if he knows I'm trans or I'm atheist or I'm leftist or I'm a multiple time suicide attempt survivor#the list goes on#sigh#i am tired#22 years of just existing#barely living#always surviving#behind everone in my age group#no chance to catch a break#with too many disabling diagnoses to count#a family that will never understand#and too much self-sabotage to ever heal without backtracking and ruining everything#I'm sorry#i don't want to be negative or self-absorbed or any of the things i am#i promise i try so hard#but who will see this and care#too weak to live too weak to die#just being pushed around by life's forces like a plastic bottle with the ebb and flow of the stormy tide#too many dark and cloudy thoughts too few tumblr tags allowed per post
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Also in the replies of the Steph concept art on twitter announcing she was gonna be in a new project at DC (posted by Travis Mercer), there were at least 3 comments saying "will Tim be there?" I don't care how hard you ship timsteph I'm exploding you with my eyeballs if you do that on my girls post again
#ramblings of a lunatic#taking a step back to acknowledge that my stanning may be getting overzealous#but then again I'm not in ppls quotes or replies I'm vagueing on an entirely different website with no relevant tags. it could be worse#anyway I know tims had it rough these past couple of months ever since zdarsky shifted focus of the batman title to have less tim#but it still feels. idk. just a wee bit uninspired to act like steph can't go two steps without tim being behind her#im ngl i like timsteph when they're cute but timsteph twitter has been. pissing me off a tad lately#the refusal to acknowledge the sexism in dixons robin run and how it impacts stephs writing and their relationships writing#the refusal to acknowledge tims occasional condescension and hypocrisy when it comes to stephs vigilantism#seemingly only wanting her to be spoiler when he wants her around and telling her to give it up most of the time#also the constant disrespect of stephs batgirl era on there weirdly enough?#I've harped on about this on main and in drafts but despite it's flaws it's a good turn for stephs character#she's the focus she gets development (an upward trajectory! which had previously been unheard of for her! bc she did have flaws as spoiler-#-its just that both writers and characters alike seemed to arbitrarily decide she didn't have the capacity to grow past them! but she did!)#hell i saw a BIZARRE take today i just have to bitch about#which was them saying that Batgirl was a ''heteronormative mask'' steph put on#with spoiler being her more authentic self (and this being paralleled to gender expression with stephs isolation from the batfam as spoiler-#-showing how she ''wasnt like them'')#which. I'm not denying you the view that spoiler has a certain genderific swag to her but the needless dragging of her batgirl persona#steph got treated badly as spoiler bc she was A Girl. it's genuinely that simple dixon felt batman and robin would never stand for a girl-#-running around doing the things they did and would need to chivalrously stop her. he's gone on record saying this#she's constantly getting belittled by mostly men (cass also dismisses her but it feels distinctly less gendered)#and in the end it's barbara who learns to give steph a second chance despite her mistakes and they have a positive relationship#something ppl are quick to dismiss as being in and of itself sexist bc they're pairing the two girls off together#as if batgirl isn't a legacy and as if babs and steph don't have parallels in their resilience and refusal to accept when ppl tell them no#for better and for worse!!#like. idk how you took the strongest feminist element in that comic (bc there are elements of sexism here and there! 2009 n all)#and somehow turn it into ''heteronormativity'' YOU PPL ARE JUST SAYING WORDS AT THIS POINT!!!#anyway. someone take away my internet access
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Listen if you're gonna send me an ask about why I shouldn't interact with a person, can you at least do it off anon so I can request actual proof privately? I'm not replying to these since the only way to respond to them is publicly and I don't want to contribute to an unsubstantiated rumor about someone. That's not fair.
#Also I checked and I don't even follow them! So don't worry about me not interacting I've been doing a bang up job already#Maybe I did in the past because there were only like 4 of us in the Tr/ig/un tags at any given time#But I don't now so I have no clue how or why you dmed me about this random person I don't even follow#The only mention of them I can find on my blog via search (granted it's a gamble cuz search sucks but) is a tag on a gifset from 2014#I mean if you're browsing posts from 2014 on my blog all the more power to you I had good taste#But also I don't really know this person. I vaguely recognize the username but again. Only 4 of us at any given time for years#It just feels Weird.#If ur going thru the trouble of sending asks abt this person then put your own reputation on the line since you're trying to tank theirs#Like if you believe these accusations enough that ur willing to send asks to randos then u should be comfy putting your name behind them#I'm giving u the benefit of the doubt here anon#I want to believe ur heart is in the right place and u think ur helping#But being on anon with 0 proof is not helping your case at all#Cruddy rambles#Ask
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