#I used to watch his vines all the time as a kid. I loved his vids with the SU actors

[black-salt-cage]

Bet. Sanders sides.

I don't know anything about sanders side, sadly! but I can tell a funny story involving thomas sanders

one time just after my bf and I got very serious we had the longest makeout session just to slowly stop in the middle of it because we realized mid-smooch that youtube on the tv had autoplayed a thomas sanders vine/skit compilation that we didn't notice til like an hour into it 😭

[thekissofaphrodite]

I Grew this for you, Ives.

Luke Castellan X Daughter of Demeter! Reader

Summary: Your secret meetup with your boyfriend, Luke, might have been interrupted by Percy Jackson.

Warnings: MakeUp...MAKEOUT- I MEAN. Language (Tell me if i missed one!)

Author's note: It might be kinda weird that the title doesn't match the summary but trust me, it's worth reading. + If you saw a fic from another blog the same as this i requested it and decided i wanna make the fic myself.

___

New kid, New responsibility. You were known as being motherly towards every kid that stepped in Camp Half Blood. And Maybe, Just maybe, Percy Jackson considered you as his Camp Mom, It wasn't new for older campers seeing a new 12 year old boy follow you around and look up at you with big puppy eyes along with Grover's confused look, but oh well.

Ever since your Godly Mother, Demeter has claimed you, Luke has called you Ives since then. It all happened when three years ago, you ended up in Camp Half blood after your mortal father has been killed by a chimera, much to his sacrifice, You might have offered some small offerings to your Brother In Law, Hades, to watch him in the underworld. Your first week into camp half-blood, Chiron had announced that Capture the Flag will be the first game for the day, you were teamed up with the reds (Much to your disappointment) you were near the cabin fire when two boys from the blue team had cornered you (One of them was luke) you raised you hands to cover yourself but then, Two ivy vines sprouted out the soil and blocked them, horror washed over you when one of the vines that you 'accidentally' summoned strangled one of the boys, Luke was able to escape and still..Blue team one.

While they were celebrating, The red team started ranting angrily about how you made them lose, You sat in a corner, your head leaned against an oak tree as you sobbed, then, a bright greenish-yellow light appeared with gold sickle with a few sheaths of wheat above your head, No one was there, not until a group of campers saw you, they ran and moments later, almost dozens of campers were in front of you, including chiron.

"All Hail Y/n Y/L/N, Daughter of Demeter"

Bunch of flowers started sprouting near you, The forest and plants looked much more healthier in your eyes as every one knelt down, Including Luke, Who gave you a mischievous wink.

"....And this is the mess hall, You're always designated to sit with your cabin mates but that depends, most unclaimed kids just sit with their friends" You said, Glancing at Percy, The young boy just nodded shyly and coughed,trying to hide his blushing cheeks.

"Looks like someone has a crush on you" Luke appeared behind you with a grin, Percy's eyes immediately went wide, making you chuckle.

"Crushes don't hurt, it's admiration afterall" You whispered before giving percy a light kiss on his cheeks, leaving luke shocked.

One of you halfsiblings, Althea, called you over. Apparently, another one of your half sibling's EX boyfriend from the Dionysus cabin used a lard grapevine to ruin the bathroom door inside the cabin while you sibling is showering out of rage and jealousy.

Now, As head of your cabin, It's either you spent one whole hour being lectured by Mr. D out of his favoritism or...Plead with one of the Hephaestus kids to fix it for you.

What a day.

Giving Luke and Percy one last smile, You left.

__

"C'mon Felix! This is the only time that i've asked for a favour out of all the favours i've done for you, You'd do it for me" You pleaded as you followed him back and forth inside his cabin's workshop.

"Look, Y/n, I love you as my friend, but i can't do it, not right now"

"What if i give you a 25$ gift card from burger king and......" You scouried your pocket hoping to find something, Your eyes lit up as you felt a bill in your palms "50 dollars...and...." You then went to pat your bra and pulled out a coin. "A Peso"

You then placed it in his soily hands, Felix's face remained calm, he then took the money.

"It's warm..." He said kinda horrified...You pulled the peso out of your bra for the gods sake!

"Take it or leave it."

He then rolled his eyes and grabbed his toolbox.

"Lead the way"

You squealed and hugged him before pulling him to your cabin.

As you watched him repair the door in silence, Felix broke the silencce by purposely dropping a hammer to the ground, the loud clattering sound made you flinch a little, he smirked "Thinking about Luke?"

You snorted, as if tho you weren't actually thinking about him, "No, i'm thinking about Percy"

"The new kid who broke Clarisse's spear? he's badass"

"mhm, Son of Poseidon"

"Speaking of, How's Luke?"

There was a moment of silence before you replied.

"Fine"

"Just 'fine' ? No ungodly things happening?"

"No" You could've bursted out laughing.

"I don't believe you, C'mon tell me some elaborate details"

You raised your brow, a mischievous glint appearing in your eyes.

"Actually, if you finished that, i'll tell you"

The Hephaestus boy huffed and went back to work

After an hour, Felix finished repairing the door and bid you a goodbye (Along with a side-eye)

__

It was now 11 pm, the Campfire sing-along ended almost an hour ago, and you were in your cabin, re-arranging your stuffed toys for the 5th time, (Making one plushie lay beside you will cause chaos among the plushies)

"Carrie..You go here and..Princess should be right....here, Done!"

All of your plushies were in order when you heard a knock from the window near your bunkbed. then, you saw luke, still in his usual camp shirt, unlike you who was in your rather inappropriate pajamas.

His eyes first landed on you, he then grinned before groaning and landing on your soft bunk bed.

"Hey ives-"

"Luke, what're you doing here?!" You hissed, afraid that your half siblings might caught you two.

"Can i not see you?"

"You can, but not at this time" You huffed, But he was still grinning before pulling a flower pot, with a rose.

"I grew this for you, Ives" He whispered, His eyes carefully scanning you expression before you chuckled.

"You know i can grow this in seconds?"

"Mhm, But still, I love you 'till the very last rose in this entire world wilt into ash"

A smile graced upon your lips before luke grabbed your cheeks and kissed you, the flowerpot fell into your bed, the soil staining your new bedsheet, You couldn't care less.

You deepened the kiss by pulling Luke by his neck, and a groan escaped his lips, his calloused hands then slowly went up your shorts making you moan a little, His hands became closer and closer and closer until-

"Luke?"

You two pulled away, Luke's hands were still in your inner thighs, he took a peak into your window and saw Percy, in his cute pajamas with messy blonde hair.

"Percy" Luke breathed.

"What's up?"

"The Apollo cabin seemed to be having a party, the noise is too loud and i can't sleep, i was wondering if you could go see it "

You then peaked into your window, your cheeks were pressed against luke's

"Y/n? Wait..what are you guys doing? and...why are you in her window?" Percy asked, his drowsiness seemed to have vanished.

Luke couldn't even answer percy himself, he started chuckling softly before burying his face into your neck and smothered it with kisses.

Percy then stood still before realizing, he cleared his throat, but before he could leave you called him.

"You know what? I think Luke could actually take a look at those Sun Brats" Luke immediately groaned and looked at you.

"Seriously?"

"Seriously. Go help the poor boy"

"Yes Ma'am"

He then got up and just as he was about to climb down your bunk bed you stopped him.

"Nah uh, You can leave where you entered"

The dark haired boy chuckled, and and started climbing down the window, before he could jump back to the ground you kissed him one last time, But this time, the kiss was much more passionate. You could've sworn percy made a gagging face before turning around.

"I love you Ives"

" 'Till the very last rose in this entire world wilt into ash" You said, Luke's eyes soften.

You watched as he and Percy went to the Apollo cabin to resolve the chaos.

The flower potted rose sat in your bed, You took it, and glanced at the beautiful red beauty, You sniffed the fragrance before placing it near your window as you felt Hypnos' warm palm caressing you to sleep.

__

The next day, The first thing you did was bang into Felix's cabin, Giving him every detail from last night as Luke, along with percy watched you from afar.

A/N:

Hey Guys! I've been gone for too long and i just watched the new PJO series and i have to be honest, I fell in love with Charlie as Luke so here's a little treat for you guys while i finish my other fics, i do hope you guys like it!

[ddaz3d-and-cc0nfused]

fem plus size mutant!reader, wc: 664.

a/n: OH ME OH MY!!! i haven't written for a new character in so long! it's so refreshing!! forgive me if logan is a bit ooc and a lot of things probably don't make sense, i'm still in the process of watching the movies so i tried to keep things as vague as possibly aside from the spoilers i've been given! i have fallen so deeply in love with this man so he will definitely be making an apperance on this acc more! ty for your request! @hicanivent

You never thought in all your years of living, you would be the one thing that managed to scare away Logan, and all it took was a kiss.

Maybe it was your fault or possibly the tension that had surrounded the two of you since you had joined the mutant school as another professor.

Either way, what was done is done, and you couldn’t sleep.

You stared up at your roof which was decorated with all sorts of plant vines. Though you were a mutant as well, your ability was minor. You were able to manipulate plants; you could make them move, grow, or wilt. It was nothing too impressive, but the children enjoyed your gardening class.

Gardening wasn’t the only thing you taught, there was also the history of different herbs and species of plants and how they were used throughout time. 

That’s where your dilemma of insomnia lies. With an aching heart and an active brain, essays sat delicately on your desk in your classroom, and you were contemplating on whether or not you should just grade them. The kids weren’t expecting them back anytime soon, but what else were you to do?

A part of you is afraid that maybe you’ll run into Logan stalking through the halls like he does sometimes when his brain gets too loud. It was like he always had something to run from, and somehow he’d always find himself knocking on your door at all hours of the night. Sometimes he wouldn’t even talk, just sit there and find comfort in your presence.

You weren’t ashamed to say that you’re worried about him, but Logan was probably the most stubborn man you had ever met, so if he didn’t want to do something, you couldn’t force him. Sometimes you wish you could.

You threw your blankets off of your body, sitting on the edge of the bed and held your head in your hands. You felt the exhaustion seeping into your bones and you let out a prolonged sigh.

A hesitant knock on your door pulled you out of your tired stupor, your head shooting up in alarm.

You honestly thought it was one of the kids, definitely not a very shaken up looking Logan.

A very bitter part of you wanted to turn him away, but a very extremely soft part of you – the part that was in love with him – led you to open up the door wider with a small encouraging smile on your face.

He looked unsure for a moment before breaking through the threshold. 

“I’m sorry.”  Was the first thing he had said before you even had a chance to turn around after shutting the door.

He was standing in the middle of your room, the midnight glow shining through your window casted an enchanting shadow against the naked skin of his arms that was exposed by his classic plain white undershirt. 

You don’t know how you managed to speak through the dryness of your throat.

“It’s okay.” You spoke quietly, looking up at him through tired eyes. “No it’s not.” He denied. You approached him slowly before you cupped his cheek. “But Logan, it is.”

Your words had a plethora of meanings behind them, that you forgive him, that you were waiting until he was ready. 

You stare at each other for a moment, his large battle worn hands rest on the plumpness of your hips, and the supernatural warmth of his body sends a pleasant shiver up your spine.

“If I kiss you, are you going to run away again?” You joke, breaking the intense atmosphere. 

A small smirk tugs at the corner of his lips ever so slightly. “Nah, I think I’ll stick around this time.”

Logan doesn’t give you time to retort because he had already found himself kissing you, the scruff of his mutton chops scratching at your cheeks ever so slightly. It tickled and you giggled, smiling into his mouth.

You felt him smile too.

[bonesandchalamet]

predictable - c.fisher

masterlist

requested: y- “Can you do a conrad fisher x reader where the readers family has a house next to theirs so they grew up going to cousins for the summers (cons age), and they are in love w each other but don’t want to admit it and everyone notices it around them/teases them. maybe a flash ward to their wedding in a couple of years and everyone’s speeches are like “yeah i won the bet they would be married by now” or smth like that?“

pairings: conrad fisher x fem!reader

warnings: fluff + jokes

a/n: I hope I did this justice anon! xx there are NO spoilers of book 2 or season 2!

you can hear his voice. it’s muffled, he sounds like he’s in your kitchen, a blessing of having the bedroom right above it, but you can hear him talking to your mother.

you don’t have time to think, you just fling your legs over your mattress and rush down the stairs at an appropriate pace. you’d just woke up, maybe not your best state to be in, but you couldn’t wait to see conrad fisher. the boy next door.

he’d gone to Princeton, smart cookie if you say so yourself, and you hadn’t seen him since last summer. in fact, you only saw him maybe once or twice outside of the neighborhood and that was getting ice cream and groceries. other than that, you live by the fence that separates your yards waiting to hear the laughter and conversations from the Conklin and fisher kids.

“just tomatoes? are you sure? I can go pick out some basil—“

“no, no laurel will kill you if you do any more yard work! I can get it.” you hear conrad protest. the fisher family was used to your parents generosity, the beautiful vegetable garden grew right on the fisher/y/l/n house line, the family was more than welcome to eat and take whatever they wanted, but it didn’t stop them from being kind enough to ask. Susannah raised those boys right.

“are you sure?”

“what’s going on?” you ask, it’s like the words floated out of you when you saw him. his brown hair a little longer than normal, his t-shirt a bit smaller on him, and he’s wearing small navy blue swim trunks. a sight to make any girl swoon for a fisher.

“oh, y/n, do you think you can help conrad get some more tomatoes from the vines? it seems to be the fisher-Conklin clan has run out.” your mother hands you Susannah’s woven basket that conrad was once holding. your mother looks at you with pleading eyes but she knows you’ll do anything that has conrad fisher involved.

“happy to.” you take the basket in your hand and gesture for conrad to follow. he thanks your mother once again and follows along out the back door. you can hear not only just your heartbeat, but the blood rushing to your ears.

being alone with Conrad was sometimes awkward. at least to you it always felt that way, because you never knew how to be around him as yourself. you were so deeply in love with him that just being in his presence was enough to make you fumble over your words.

“here I can get the tomatoes.” conrad pushes past you, his shoulder brushing against your body, you could smell his cologne, the salty ocean in his hair, and the mixture of the laundry detergent Susannah uses. it was an intoxicating smell, one to make your world spin.

“you sure? they are kind of all over the place.” you chuckle setting the basket down into the grass. you start picking the beautiful blush red ones and gently place them in the basket along side the ones conrad was picking. every so often your hands would brush or you’d about pick the same tomato. you both would blush and apologize instantly for the connection.

“would you guys just kiss already! you’re making me nauseous.” Jeremiah calls over the fence line from the pool, he’s watched about every embarrassing second of you and his brothers interactions.

“come on, con!” Steven hollers, it’s loud enough for the neighbors on the other side of their house to snicker at the boys energy for far too early in the morning.

“I don’t know what their problem is.” Conrad says and it’s only for you two to hear. he’s picked up the basket from the grass now, you’re stuck with holding a few more tomatoes that he claims would be more than enough for everyone.

“no seriously, just keep those ones.”

“we have enough inside, just take them—“

“fine,” he huffs out an annoyed sigh and watches you dump them into the basket, “can I at least make you breakfast with them?”

“sounds like a plan to me.”

that day, he made you more than breakfast. he made you feel the most indescribable feeling of love and excitement. he left you walking home as beat red as those tomatoes you picked. you could thank Steven and Jeremiah for their pressure and tease, because conrad fisher did in fact kiss you that morning.

—

FUTURE

“I’m so happy for these guys because today I became twenty dollars richer,” Jeremiah pauses, the laughter of friends and family make you both blush, “so thank you Steven for believing they would never get married. here’s to the bride and the groom!” Jeremiah holds his champagne glass up, others in the room follow.

“you really bet we would get married?” Conrad turns to his brother who passes the microphone to belly before sitting down beside him.

Jeremiah’s hands clap his brothers shoulder, “we also made a bet that you’d kiss her that summer. belly also made a bet that you’d have tomatoes on the menu, looks like you guys are the most predictable couple ever.”

[greenunoreversecard]

HEYYEYHEY CAN I REQUEST LLOYD (ninjago) HEADCANONS PLEASEEEE (ty :3)

A/N: Ofc!I'll do general character ones, as well as x reader ones :) hope ye likey likey:pp

Lloyd, The Greenest and Geekest mf.

General character headcanons:

Half Japanese half Chinese

His hair is box blonde dye and you cannot change my mind.

Left handed

Severely dyslexic and hands off all scroll reading and just reading oriented tasks to kai.

Def gen z vibes. Like, the others give off more inbetween z and millenial, so they dont always get his humor. And sometimes he uses that to his advantage and "Speaks in code" (uses as much slang as possible)

Has LED lights in his room set to forest green.

Has given himself a smiley face tattoo.

Cried over a dead goose once.

OK, just to preface i see cole as a stoner of Sorts and uses the excuse "it gets me closer to my element"

With that in mind cole let lloyd try it and now sometimes when he is told to unwind, of feels like he needs to take a chill pill he and Cole spark up

in the beginning of his leader ship role, he used to Say;"kick ass and take names" and if things went wrong he had the fuck it we ball mindset, but got better with time. There are still times they wing it, though.

if he isnt in his gi he almost exclusively wears his pajamas (aka a Hoodie, tshirt and sweats)

Vv tired, and now has a raging addiction to energy drinks due to his lack of Sleep.

He used to eat worms as a kid bc he Thought he it was evil.

Has a eyebrow piercing, and wants a tongue piercing.

Wears "reading" glasses, that he should technically wear all the time because he can't see up close and has a astigmatism,, but he says yolo. Zane then make him contacts after he almost ran into a moving blade and got his head severed.

Adhd and OCD, as well as the normal line up (anxiety, depression, cptsd)

Lloyd in a relationship:

Hes very distant in the beginning, it'll take time to warm up to you.

He tends to be orage cat vibes.

On the cat trend, he gets close for a bit Before becoming distant. Going through waves of affection, kinda.

He hasn't had like, any good relationships in his life so he tries to "protect" himself when he feels he gets to close to you, and so he pulls away.

He does the fuckboy face when your sad bc it makes you laugh, as well as That weird dice roll

He actually does the face/dice roll combo whenever he Sees you as he walks over, it's an inside joke now

primary giving love language: acts of service and quality time

Primary receiving love language: gifts and words of affirmation. But physical touch is also high up there.

Also, not expensive gifts. He hates those. Give him a stick you saw on a walk that made you think of him. He'll cherish it forever. And maybe cry.

He will cry.

will make noises at you and expects a noise in response or he'll be sad.

Also randomly bites you. He's a nommer

also sends you memes throughout the day.

As well as random pictures with the caption;"BABY LOK THIS IS S. US IF WE WHERE *insert whatever item here*

Called you babe, baby, love, shitface, asshole.

Expect kind and loving gentle bullying.

Doesnt know how to express his emotions to just expect him to come up to you, lightly shake your shoulders and aggressively say;"I love you bitch.i ain't Evea gon stop lovin you. Bitchhhhhhh" (vine reference)

Sends you .5 of everyone, himself included. He's addicted to Taking them. You will not get out of it.

Also sometimes just walks around in nyas stilettos for fun.

You two have fashion shows.

You also take over the Living room sometimes and build giant ass forts to watch shitty reality tv in and make fun oF The people

Overall, once he realizes you won't leave he's the most funniest loving chaotic guy.

But expect it to take a hot minute for him to realsie this

give him time,, but also have some deep talks..

Let him vent

and for the love of God don't hurt the baby's heart.

Expect inside jokes

[ipostwhatiwant1202]

Headcanons for all 4 TMNT:

• they all love kids but they collectively agree that babies aged 0-2 are the best

• can any of them handle spice? absolutely not. does it stop them? no.

• the only thing can all collectively agree on without much arguing is music

• all are surprisingly pretty good dancers

• they have all said "suck my dick" at some point (raph uses it the most)

• they all manspread

• nothing triggers any of them more than a spider

-raph won't go anywhere near the spider and refuses to be in the same room with it

-mikey's okay with the spider but doesn't want it touching him

-donnie will move the spider without killing it but won't touch the web

-leo will touch the spider to take it outside but the feeling freaks him out

• don't say the words "i bet you won't" cause boom there they all go

• at some point they have all referred to april as mom just to piss her off

• they all agree smores poptarts are superior

• they play with april's hair if she's sitting in front of them on the ground

• shark week is a whole thing

• thanksgiving and christmas are the turtle's favorite times of year

• they will all devour the deviled eggs and cranberry sauce

• mikey and raph will shamelessly walk in the bathroom when their brothers are showering

• leo and donnie are very guilty of leaving cupboards open in the middle of the night

• raph and leo have similar facial expressions when shit hits the fan

• mikey and donnie freak out if wet food touches them when they do the dishes

• leo and mikey both really like dr phil

• donnie and raph can't stand the taste of bananas

• do any of them truly enjoy horror? no. do they suffer through the movie anyway? yes.

• april has sat on their laps when there's been no seats

-leo is the most calm and just settles his hands where she directs

-raph is a bit more timid and keeps one hand on her waist

-donnie tries to keep his hands off her because he's awkward

-mikey just wraps his arms around her like it's a normal thing

• splinter still tells the boys stories when they can't sleep after a tough patrol

• splinter also checks on the boys every night when they go to bed

• the guys can all shotgun like it's no ones business

• they're all very protective of april and casey's child(ren)

-one time one of the kids came home crying saying another kid pushed them down and all 4 of them were fully prepared to go to war

-if the kid is taking a guy to homecoming or prom, the dude gets threatening texts and blocked phone calls

• when april and casey's child(ren) was born, all the guys cried

-leo very reluctantly let someone else have a turn holding the child(ren)

-raph has made the child(ren) a blanket as a gift when they're born

-donnie handles all the medical care for the child(ren) and april during and after birth

-mikey decorated the child(ren)'s nursery and baby shower(s)

• april gets random texts to settle dumb arguments between the brothers

• they all love adele

• they all sing in the shower

• don't bring nerf guns into the lair for the sake of splinter's sanity

• vine references are frequently thrown around the lair

• they've all watched 90 day fiancé and they all hate ed

• mikey is the only one who can get any of his brothers to cry from laughing

• leo may suck at comforting his brothers but they all seek him out for comfort anyway

• donnie's sleep schedule is the worst so when he falls asleep in his lab his brothers have each carried him to bed

• raph can't sleep properly unless he knows that his brothers are close by and he's seen them go to bed

• splinter will still sometimes tuck the boys into bed if he knows they've had a rough time

• all of them have cussed out casey and vern for saying the wrong thing about a brother

• they all hardly swear around april

• splinter has banned legos in the lair because the boys were using them as revenge against each other

[starrynights-sunnyskies]

as the flowers bloom, my heart does too ⋆*·ﾟmisa x putellas!femreader, social media au, (13/17)

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when your relationship ends and all you want to do is hide and cry, flowers suddenly start to appear on your doorstep.

or; misa hating to see a pretty girl cry and suffer and going out of her way to cheer her up while staying anonymous

fic: see my masterlist 🤍

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tagged: friend1, marisabel_rguez, re-inc yourusername: 💋 liked by re-inc, christenpress, laiacodina5 and 4,389 others

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re-inc Looking good! 🤙✨

friend1 masks, manis and movies 💆‍♂️🕺 ↳ yourusername 💃💅🏽

christenpress Loving the outfit!

albaps9 fuck you, why do you keep stealing my sunnies? 😤 ↳ yourusername hahahaha ↳ albaps9 no it's not fucking funny anymore yn 😫

marisabel_rguez Vroom vroom 😎 ↳ yourusername im in me mums car ↳ marisabel_rguez Que??? ↳ bff1 what did i say? grandma! who tf still quotes vines these days? ↳ yourusername cool people

alexiaputellas Two arms around Misa next time, por favor. Don't want a repeat of you falling off a bike again 😆 liked by marisabel_rguez

salmaparalluelo I miss you!! ↳ yourusername i miss you too! text me! 🤗

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↳ 8h ago: yourusername added to their story

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↳ 18h ago: yourusername added to their story

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tagged: bff3 yourusername: finally an auntie. ready to smother this little boy with all the love i have for the rest of his life. liked by bff3, marisabel_rguez, albaps9 and 2,380 others

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albaps9 wait, did i push out a baby im unaware of?? ↳ yourusername god you're so dramatic

bff2 The most beautiful and healthy little baby boy 💘

bff1 already waiting for the day he'll get to watch paw patrol with his paw-nties 🐶

alexiaputellas Congratulations, @/bff3 ❤️

username1 Oh dear god, for a second I thought this baby was hers before I read the caption 😅 ↳ username2 OMG ME TOO. i was like... but how-when-where?! ↳ username3 can you imagine though??? misa and yn as mommies? 😱 ↳ username4 i kind of can't, not for a while at least 😂

marisabel_rguez Adorable ☺️😍

bff3 He took to you so easily, and you to him. He's lucky to have you all in his life. I can't be happier that he'll get to have you to look up to 🥺

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↳ 55min ago: marisabel_rguez added to their story ↳ 51min ago: marisabel_rguez added to their story

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tagged: yourusername marisabel_rguez: Life is good 💛 liked by ona.battle, sofie.svava, laiacodina5 and 13,589 others

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albaps9 was misa stuck singing kid songs again while babysitting? 🤣 ↳ marisabel_rguez How do you know about that? ↳ yourusername 😳😛 ↳ albaps9 also, i can't believe our cousin lets you babysit over ME, i literally WORK with children?!? ↳ yourusername he's just letting us practice <3 ↳ marisabel_rguez Wait what?? 😅 ↳ albaps9 👀 ↳ alexiaputellas 🤨 ↳ yourusername to watch the little angel @/bff3 has blessed us with! ↳ albaps9 ok, gotcha!!!! ↳ marisabel_rguez 🙂 ↳ bff3 😘

sofie.svava 😍

ingridengen We miss you two 😙

yourusername i love you ↳ marisabel_rguez 😘

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tagged: yourusername bff2 Found this strange lady sitting at the gate. Think I should approach? liked by 320 people

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bff1 no, best to leave her there if you like your life. just turn around and pretend you didn't see her. trust me on this. ↳ yourusername 😦

albaps9 that's just her default mood. give her some snacks or bring her her gf and she'll be fine

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tagged: bff2 yourusername: oui are having a great time liked by alexiaputellas, ona.battle, marialeonn16 and 3,435 others

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marisabel_rguez Eiffel for you 🤩 ↳ yourusername holy crepe, i am in-seine-ly in love with you!! ↳ marisabel_rguez I louvre you too! ↳ yourusername i never want toulouse you ↳ marisabel_rguez ❤️ ↳ alexiaputellas You're perfect for each other 😐😂 liked by yourusername, marisabel_rguez and 56 others

bff2 Crossaints as big as my head!! 🥐☕️ ↳ bff1 so that's the size of a small country then? ↳ bff2 Fuck off 😂

bff3 Stay safe and have fun! Kisses from the three of us. And I want a debrief with all your photos after you get home! 😘 liked by yourusername

albaps9 the lara croft glasses make their return

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Text Messages

14:31 Misa 🤍 Hey, gorgeous. How's your day going?

15:56 you love!! it's been really sweet. we had brunch at the classiest cafe and did some shopping. went to an art gallery too. strolling the streets a bit now and going to the moulin rouge tonight! 💃

16:03 Misa 🤍 I can't wait to see all the photos! Watch out for pickpockets!!

16:04 you seeing as i wear my heart on my sleeve and all, that's great advice. thanks, chula

16:04 Misa 🤍 😊😘

16:56 you and i'm thinking of you. always. good luck with your match tonight. i'll try and catch some of it through stream when we're back in the hotel room. i love you.

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↳ 18h ago: yourusername added to their story ↳ 12h ago: yourusername added to their story ↳ 10h ago: yourusername added to their story ↳ 2h ago: yourusername added to their story

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tagged: bff2 yourusername: riviera shenanigans 🇫🇷 liked by salmaparalluelo, ingridengen, begovargas and 2,389 others

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alexiaputellas Double trouble ❤️

bff3 I'm so jealous right now!! Can hardly get a night out nowadays hahaha. ↳ bff1 well you decided to pop out a baby, you have to live with those consequences now 🤪 ↳ yourusername baaabe!!! 😔let me know if you ever need us to look after your little boy. misa and i would be glad to. ↳ bff3 Definitely going to take you up on that offer once he's a little older! ↳ bff2 As soon as we can, we should schedule a trip with the four of us again! ↳ bff1 YES PLEASE ↳ yourusername i'm down <3 ↳ bff3 Sounds amazing 😘

marisabel_rguez Ladies!! ☺️ liked by yourusername and bff2

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Text Messages

10:03 Misa Hey Alba, are you free and up for lunch today? 😁

10:45 Alba Putellas flattered, but yn really is the only perfect putellas for you

10:53 Misa Shut up 😂

10:53 Misa It just feels like we haven’t done anything together in a while.

10:54 Alba Putellas tempting… what’s really behind this tho? you can't fool me 🧐

10:54 Misa Nothing, just want to chat and catch up.

10:55 Alba Putellas hmm sure... will you pay?

10:59 Misa Fine

11:12 Alba Putellas time and place and i'll be there! 😚

Delivered

13:04 Misa Maybe don't tell YN I'm in Barcelona to pick her up from the trainstation. I want to surprise her. Her friend's already in on it.

Seen

13:14 Misa Alba, don't tell me you've already told her 😅

13:18 Alba Putellas SORRY. how was i supposed to know to keep it a secret when you texted me earlier?????

13:26 Misa No worries, it's okay. I'll see you in a bit! I'm stopping by the florist first.

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↳ 2h ago: marisabel_rguez added to their story

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↳ 2min ago: yourusername added to their story

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tagged: yourusername and 6 others bff2: Libertas perfundet omnia luce!! UB reunion!! Let's go!! liked by 493 people

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friend seconds before the real fun started!

friend Night's a complete mess already and it has barely even begun🤣

friend Bold of you to post a pic already when I'm sure we'll make plenty better photos during the rest of the night ↳ yourusername this is her 'before the damage' photo ↳ bff2 Caught!! 🙈

friend hey i'm not even there yet!! don't let the fun start already 😭

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↳ 2h ago: bff2 added to their story ↳ 2h ago: bff2 added to their story ↳ 2h ago: bff2 added to their story

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Text Messages

23:56 albaquerque 🌼 is that who i think it is in your friend's story?

00:34 you you got that right! crazy huh?

00:38 albaquerque 🌼 yn fucking idiot?? you don't put your ex gf on your lap and then pose for a picture, puta madre

00:38 you 😟

00:39 you jesus alba. chill. i'm at a university reunion. someone from our mutual friend group set it up. it's not like i texted her to meet up. we scooted our chairs together for the photo, that's all. she wasn't on my lap.

00:39 you and you know our breakup was chill. she's cool. it's been a couple of years. it was actually really sweet to catch up again after all this time, see how our lives changed and how much we've grown. it was sweet! we had so much to talk about 😭

00:39 albaquerque 🌼 that's exactly why it was such a bad idea omfg do you hear yourself? you're such a bimbo sometimes

00:46 you alba, we're both mature women and respect and understand that we were a part of each other's lives and past but that's that. there's nothing there. we parted as friends and we're still friends now. that's all. reuniting with her won't resurface my feelings. all that there is, is platonic now. i care for her in the sense that i want her to do well in life, but not with me by her side.

00:46 you but i can see why you'd think it's a little tasteless, but we only did that silly picture. we sat around a table with all the others the rest of the night. i told her about misa!! then the guys heard she was a footballer and we talked more about how we got together and such. everyone thought it was the sweetest story. frankly, i don't think i stopped bringing her up whenever i could 😭

00:46 you but wait ew why am i even defending myself to you

00:46 albaquerque 🌼 with all due respect, she was your first love, your first everything. and i know that things didn't work out, but i know you've always kept a soft spot for her because of that. you haven't talked since uni and now you're close again? i just don't want you to make a mistake.

00:51 you you're trying to find drama that isn't there, alba. she is a friend. and she's an ex for a reason.

00:53 albaquerque 🌼 who you used to kiss and fuck like you were energiser bunnies. that's a line you can't uncross. you're not being very respectful to your girlfriend. you can't mix those worlds with a clear conscience. imagine how misa will feel?

00:55 you oh so you consider me completely unable to be a mature woman and think i can't have a normal conversation without jumping into a woman's pants?

00:55 you and you're so disgusting, why did you have to say that. that made me really uncomfortable.

00:55 albaquerque 🌼 truth hurts

1:02 you why are you even lecturing me and why am i even listening to you out of all people?? i don't care what kind of shit date you had tonight but you don't go and lash that out on me.

1:04 albaquerque 🌼 because i know what i'm talking about when it comes to that. i made mistakes so i could learn and tell you what not to do. that's what older sisters are for.

1:07 you yeah, they're to look up to, not to pull you down

1:07 albaquerque 🌼 yn listen, where are you now? how much did you drink? do i need to pick you guys up?

1:07 you you didn't have to say it like that

1:07 you clearly not enough bc the headache i have rn is bc of you and not bc of the booze

1:07 albaquerque 🌼 where are you. drop your location

1:12 you fucking hell, go and annoy someone else.

1:12 albaquerque 🌼 i just don't want you ruining this good thing you finally have

1:23 you why do you think i ever would? do you really trust me so little? do you really think i would throw away what i have with misa, something i have waited for my entire life, something i've dedicated love and passion and dedication and energy to for almost two years? do you really think i would hurt my partner? the woman i want to propose to? you putting the thought in my head of her not being in my life makes me even more sure i want to stay by her side forever. do you really think that i would put her heart and her happiness on the line for an ex with whom i was never this in love with as i am with misa? do you really think i could hurt my favourite person like that?

1:23 albaquerque 🌼 goddamn yn, you're taking this out of proportion. i didn't mean it all like that.

1:23 albaquerque 🌼○○○

1:23 you no, my reaction is fair, and i think you meant it exactly that way. and you know what? don't even reply to what i asked. i'm afraid of the answer, seeing you also don't trust me having an ex around. if you wanted me to have an as shitty night as you, then you have succeeded, thank you very much

1:23 albaquerque 🌼 ○○○

1:24 you and you had no reason to attack me like that over a photo. you should know me better than what you're implying i was up to. and it really fucking hurts that you think i would do such a thing. i fucking love misa and you should know that. and you obviously doubting if i do, is making me feel really anxious if misa really knows how much i love her.

1:24 albaquerque 🌼 ○○○

1:24 albaquerque 🌼 ○○○

1:24 you stop typing. fucking fuck off, alba. and don't text me. i'm really mad at you right now. leave me alone.

1:24 you and don't even try and contact me through mama or ale. or misa. or any of my friends.

1:25 albaquerque 🌼 ❗️Not delivered - yn i'm sorry, of course i trust you. i panicked. i shouldn't have said the things i did. sorry sorry i regret it. can we talk about it? i know you are in love with her. she's your entire world and you are hers, i can see that, don't worry. i never doubted that. but i panicked that maybe your ex would still be interested and would say just the right thing or bring up a memory and would put seeds of doubt in your mind or tempt you. i shouldn't have thought so. that was very low of me. and i know you would never do such a thing. im sorry.

1:25 albaquerque 🌼 ❗️Not delivered - where are you rn tho? im worried. but sorry again. im so sorry laelia. i just panicked, like i said, i don't want you to ruin what you have and also because misa-

1:25 albaquerque 🌼 ❗️Not delivered - oh great, of fucking course you blocked me.

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Text Messages

2:01 Alexia Hey, what's happened? I'm rooming with Misa at camp and YN called her in absolute tears. It's the middle of the night??

2:09 Alba fuck, okay, well i really didn't mean it the way i did but i guess i was a little too harsh about it??

2:09 Alexia About what?

2:09 Alexia And a little? You don't say. I couldn't even understand a word she said 🤨

2:09 Alexia I want you to tell me everything. And you have to do damage control the second you wake up tomorrow.

2:09 Alba yeah and i will, tho im not sure i'll be able to catch a wink of sleep now. but we also might have another problem

2:09 Alexia And you didn't think the one you created was enough? What is it?

2:11 Alba i don't know how serious she was about it or if it was a spur-of-the-moment thing, and how short or long term her plans are, but the idea of proposing to misa is there...

2:11 Alexia Oh! Oh, wow.

2:12 Alba yeah oh

2:12 Alexia I thought we had to worry if she was ready, not worry that she was this ready.

2:12 Alba what should we do?

2:12 Alexia Change her mind, obviously.

2:14 Alba are you insane??!??!?

2:14 Alexia No, of course not, idiota!

2:14 Alba well woohoo, fucking forgive me but sarcasm doesn't hit the same way through text, alexia!!

2:14 Alba but what are we to do??

2:14 Alexia We'll come up with something.

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Text Messages

2:19 Misa Hey, Alba. I know what happened. YN called me. The intention behind wanting to protect our relationship was really sweet, but in doing so, you really hurt her, and by extension, me. I know what you meant and that you had only good intentions, but I trust her. She is an independent lady who can go out and have fun with friends and I'm absolutely not worried about her loyalty, because I can feel how much we love one another and how devoted she is to me. She told me there was a high chance that her ex would be there, and we talked about it. There was never an ounce of doubt in my mind that she would even think of either physically or mentally cheating on me. So what I'm trying to say is, don't worry about it. And don't doubt her. I don't either. She's mature and responsible and she's my person. YN is really upset thinking that you think so low of her, and worried that she was disrespectful towards me and is now actively overthinking even the most insignificant little things and interactions she's had in the time we've been together. She's worrying if she's told and shown me enough how much I love her. I know that behaviour of her will resurface now and then, it's her trauma response, but I'm really worried about it all because I can't calm her down through a phone the way I would want in real life, you know? Especially now that I'm out of the country. Once again, I know you meant well and it feels really sweet that you value our relationship and would fight for it and want it to last as much as we do. She probably doesn't want to talk to you right away, but can you please go and make it up soon? Just let her come to you first. She's staying with one of her friends now that she's in Barcelona, by the way. She's there now, she's safe.

2:45 Alba im sorry im sorry im sorry, i feel like a total ass and probleme starter and for what? ive read our chat back and i realise my mistake and my hostility to her messages. i was just panicking that all your effort would've been for nothing and that all she learned to overcome and the behaviours she grew out of with you and because of you, would be for nothing. i know you told me that she was growing quiet lately whenever you brought up the future and i know my sister. she's always had the worst coping mechanisms and it always starts with quietness and distance, so i was just afraid that she was chickening out of the commitment and that seeing her ex would be the perfect escape. i know i shouldn't have thought that about her. because that's the old her. the new her has you to hold on to in difficult times, and tonight has definitely proven that again. but the doubt and worry was a split second thought that i fed while i should've binned it the second it came up. but i've had a shitty night and seeing that photo just made it all worse. i shouldn't have taken it out on her. and i'm sorry for stepping on your toes. i just don't want you guys to ever break up. she's so happy with you. the past two years we've seen a version of her we've never seen. in a good way!! more bright and cheery and just carefree. and she can feel like that and let go of her troubles and stress because she's so loved, protected and cared for by you. once again, i'm so so sorry.

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tagged: bff2 yourusername: felt like we were young and stupid again. university reunion... check! next one we'll all have wrinkles and grey hair 😭

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friend just as fun and wild as the old days liked by yourusername

albaps9 glad you had a sweet night, ily yn. i really do ❤️

bff2 Uni gave me a massive debt but also you, so hey, that evens it all out! 😘 liked by yourusername

friend(ex) Don't you even worry about it, you'll age gracefully! friend(ex) But it was so fun to catch up again! Can't wait to support you in what life blesses you with next!! Wishing you and your loved ones all the best x friend(ex) And keep me updated on how it goes!! You got me all excited for you now!! 🤭🙈 liked by yourusername

friend you're still a real hoot! 🤙😂 liked by yourusername

friend u.b. para siempre 💙 liked by yourusername

marisabel_rguez 😘 ↳ yourusername 😙

friend And an extra 10 kgs on us 🤣🤣🤣 liked by yourusername

friend So good catching up with you again!!!! liked by yourusername

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albaps9: i love you. i’m proud of the woman you’ve grown into. you saw the hurdles life put up for you and didn't back down, but tightened your ponytail and went off running to tackle them by yourself. i wish i were a little bit more like you (only a little, i can only handle so much annoyance jajaja 🧡). you're the only little sister i'll ever want and i can't wait to stick by your side to see how much more rewarding and beautiful life will get for you.

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Direct Messages

yourusername i love you too. and i'm sorry.

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a/n: have the sweetest day, my loves! 🌼

[atimeofyourlife]

A family Thanksgiving

This was supposed to be up yesterday, but it took on a mind of its own and instead of the few hundred words it was supposed to be, its nearly 3k. Happy belated Thanksgiving to anyone who celebrates! rated: t | wc: 2847 | cw: period typical homophobia, Steve's asshole parents

The offers from everyone to have him over for Thanksgiving had been great, any other year he would have loved such a choice, but for the first time in a long time, he was spending the day with family.

"But you hate your family." Dustin pointed out when Steve had told everyone about his holiday plans.

"No, I hate my parents. It's my grandma that asked me to go, and I want to see her and my cousins that I haven't seen in like five years. I'm driving myself to Chicago, so I won't be stuck in a car with my parents for hours on end." Steve explained.

"But you're working a late the day before, and I'm not going to cover you so you can drive up early" Robin replied.

"I'm planning on leaving by six on Thanksgiving morning. It's less than four hours to drive, so I'll be there before ten, well nine because of the timezone change. I took the late shift the day before so I had an excuse to drive myself, and my parents wouldn't have any reason to come by Hawkins before. And I drive home either the Friday or the Saturday, ready for our Sunday shift."

Come Thanksgiving day, Steve was somewhat regretting his decision. It had been nearly midnight before he'd gotten home, after a number of people came in just before closing insistent on needing a selection of movies ready for the next day. Then hadn't been happy when the movies they wanted weren't in stock, so they left the place a total mess, causing Steve to stay late to tidy up ready for the opener the next day. Then having to get up around five, so he could get ready and be on track to leave as planned. In an attempt to wake up, he was mostly surviving on a large cup of incredibly strong coffee. He was just counting down the minutes until he could get there.

When he walked in the door, he was immediately wrapped up in a hug from his grandma. "Stevie, it's so good to see you."

"It's great to see you too, Grandma." He returned the hug, melting into it a little. Exactly what he needed after the year it had been.

"Let me take a look at you." She stepped back slightly, giving him a once over. Her hand came up to trace the scar still on his neck from where he had been strangled by the bats and vines. "What happened here?"

"I. It's nothing. It looks a lot worse than it is." Steve replied, trying to get out of the awkwardness of the conversation.

"Oh, if you're sure. If you want to help with dinner, you can join us in the kitchen. But if you just want to rest, anyone who's watching football is in the living room, and the Macy's parade is on in the den."

"It's been a long drive, and I had a late finish last night, so I think I'm going to take a bit of a break. I might come out and help a bit later." He offered.

"Oh, honey. If you don't feel up to it, you don't need to help at all. Take it easy, and we'll call you once everything is ready." She kissed Steve on the cheek, before going back to the kitchen.

Steve made his way through the house, glancing into the living room as he passed. He could see his dad in one of the recliners, and decided against joining them. Wanting to delay the inevitable "you're a disappointment" lecture. He knew his mom would likely be in the kitchen, not actually helping, just drinking wine and gossiping. He moved on to the den, where most of his cousins were. He hovered in the doorway for a second, unsure what to say. So much had changed since the last time he had seen any of them.

"Wait, Stevie?" One of them, Lizzie, said as she looked up to see him.

"Uh, hey?" Steve replied, a little unsure, before he was being swamped in a group hug.

"Jesus Christ, when did this happen? Last time I saw you, you were like a little kid. Now you're a whole grown adult." Another, Mark, said.

After a long catch up, bringing Steve up to date on everyone else's lives, and him giving an abridged highlights of his last few years, they then got into more serious topics.

"Was everything okay after the earthquakes? I tried calling a few times, but I don't know if I had the wrong number because it never went through." Alice, the oldest of his cousins, asked.

"The phones were down across the whole town for a while after, then it was patchy for weeks after that. It was hard to get five or ten minutes without it dropping out. It took me like two weeks before I was able to get hold of mom and dad to let them know that the house was still standing, and that I was still alive." Steve explained.

"Wait, they weren't in Hawkins for the earthquakes?" Harry cut in.

"No, they've not been in Hawkins since February? Like over a month before it happened."

"Oh. They were telling us last night about how awful and hard it had been during the earthquakes, and how they were scared for their lives." Alice replied.

"That's such bullshit. They weren't in the country when it happened, they were in London. They didn't even know that it was Hawkins that was affected until I called them, because all they'd seen on the news was a freak earthquake hitting the Midwest. It hadn't even specified the state. And then they didn't care how I was, if I was hurt or anything, all they were interested in was if there was damage to the house, and how the earthquake could affect the resale value."

"Okay, I call dibs about bringing that up over dinner. I just want to see what shade of purple Uncle Dick can turn." Becca, the closest cousin to Steve in age, piped up. "But were you hurt?"

"Uh, minor injuries. Nothing serious." Steve lied, not wanting to worry anyone. "I was able to start volunteering within a couple of days. You know, helping out at the relief center, helping search for missing people. And when everything calmed down I was helping rebuild and stuff. Just trying to do my bit. But I'm fine now."

"That's good. But thinking of Uncle Dick turning purple, who gets to bring up Fuck Reagan?" Mark asked.

"Stevie's been through the most, I think he should get the chance." Alice replied.

"Uh, I think that would go down about as well as if I told him that my best friend is a dyke and I've spent most of my free time in the last six months sucking off the local drug dealer, who was accused of being a cult leader and murdering three people." Steve said quickly, unsure if he wanted anyone else to pick up what he'd said.

"Was that for drugs, or for fun, or what? Like a hook up?" Harry asked.

"He's my boyfriend. I mean, it helps that I get free weed out of him, but I'd do it anyway." Steve admitted.

"That is something you missed out of your round up. But I love that all of us are some variation of queer."

Dinner was...interesting, to say the least. After saying Grace, they went round the table to say what they were thankful for that year. Steve had to bite his lip to keep himself from laughing as his parents waxed on and on about how they were thankful for their lives and being able to escape the earthquake unscathed. He couldn't keep from laughing when Becca spoke up against them.

"Really? Because Alice asked Steve how he found it after the earthquakes, and he said that he couldn't reach you for two weeks after it happened because the phones were down and you were in London. And you didn't even know that it had hit Hawkins until he called you."

"Steven, why are you telling lies about us?" His mother demanded.

"I wasn't? You weren't in Hawkins when the earthquake hit. You've not been there since February. When I was finally able to call you, you only cared about how the house was, not if I was hurt. And you were pissed that I hadn't called you sooner, despite the fact the phone lines were down for the whole town. I could have died or been injured in hospital, and you wouldn't have known."

"How dare-" His father started, only to be cut off by Steve's grandmother.

"Settle down. There's no need for arguing. I am inclined to believe Steve, because I do remember you telling me that you were going to be spending a few months in Europe at the start of this year."

Both of Steve's parents were visibly unhappy, but they didn't push it any further, allowing the rest of the family to talk about what they were thankful for.

Many small conversations broke out over the table, Steve loving the feeling of being surrounded by family for the first time in a long time. He got pulled into talking to different people, but he did his best to avoid his parents' eye. Not wanting to get trapped by them telling him all the ways he had bothered them since he'd last seen them. But he knew they were up to something, when his father got up before dessert was served.

"Before we have anything else, we do have a big announcement about the future of our family." He said, using the voice he always used when talking to the most important clients.

"You've sucked enough political dick to get what ever tax exemption you were after?" Lizzie asked, before anyone could take it too seriously.

Steve's dad just spluttered in anger as a call of "Elizabeth." Came from at least four different people around the table.

"Ignoring that horrible interruption. What I was going to tell everyone is about Steven's imminent engagement. He is going to be proposing to Melissa Downey, the daughter of my business partner, at Christmas, they've been seeing each other for nearly eighteen months now, and it is going to mean big things for our family."

Steve couldn't respond, processing what had just been said, as everyone started speaking, some offering congratulations, others in confusion.

"That's news to me." Steve said loudly, to get over everyone's voices, once he could form the words. "I'm not planning on proposing to anyone."

"Well, Arthur and I have been discussing it, and it is the only thing that makes sense now, the two of you have been together for long enough, the logical next step is engagement."

"I'm not dating Melissa. We went on one date over a year ago, just after I graduated. It was awful, all she was interested in was if I made enough money to bankroll her spending addiction. I made up a fake emergency to get out of it, and I would rather stick forks in my eyes than suffer through that again." Steve got to his feet, bracing his hands on the table. Knowing he'd been right not to be optimistic that the holiday could pass without incident.

"You will if you know what's good for you. If you don't, it could destroy our business. You wouldn't want to be the reason we go broke, would you? You could end up homeless. Where would you live?"

"First, I have plenty of friends who would be happy to take me in if I had nowhere else to go. It's something we talked about after the earthquake, because some people I know did have damage caused to their homes and I let them stay with me until they could move back in. Second, I don't really care about whether or not you go broke. You don't provide any money to me. You haven't since I started working at Scoops. I pay for all my food, gas, clothes. If you go broke, my financial position won't change at all. And third, I can't propose to her. I'm in a relationship, and we're both very happy."

"Is it that Buckley girl? Or did you somehow manage to convince that Wheeler girl that you're actually worth something? Because I can tell you now, you are going to break up with whatever little slut-"

"His name is Eddie." Steve shouted before he could think it through, and a silence fell across the room. "That's right. Your son is one of those awful queers that you keep campaigning against, to keep them illegal and get them locked up. And you know what? He's easily the best sex I've ever had. Especially when we get high first."

"Why you-" His father roared, his face turning a dark red in anger. "How dare you do this to us? After everything we have done for you. You'd better hope that those friends of yours would be willing to take you in, because you are not living under my roof any longer. You will have until the end of the weekend to collect your belongings, anything left will be burned."

"Except, it isn't your roof, is it Richard? If I remember correctly, I was the one who paid the mortgage. My name is the one on the deed to the property in Hawkins. I just allowed you to live there, rent-free might I add, because it made sense for you to live somewhere close to Indianapolis when your business was taking off. I had been planning to sell up. So I think maybe you should be the one to collect your belongings from that house, because I'm not sure if I want you living under my roof any longer. It sounds life you're almost never there, anyway." Steve's grandma replied.

"But, mother-" His father started.

"But nothing, Richard. I don't know where you learnt your hateful attitude, because I know I did not raise you to be the sort of man that would kick your own son out over something as minor as who he loves. I really thought you were a better man than that."

"It's disgusting." Steve's mother added. "So unnatural, and that disease."

"What is disgusting is your bigotry. I think I want you both out from under my roof, now. So, if you would both kindly leave. And I expect you to move your belongings from the house in Hawkins, as that is now Steve's house, not yours. And you better not touch anything that isn't yours, or cause any damage, because I will take legal advice." Steve's grandmother stood up, anger radiating from her tiny five foot frame. "And, unless you change and apologize for your outdated beliefs, you can forget any inheritance. I will not have any of my money going to support hatred."

"Mother,"

"Leave, Richard. Now. I'm not afraid to get the police involved here."

Steve's parents looked at him with their faces filled with utter disgust, before they turned and left. His grandmother escorting them off the property.

"Are you okay, Stevie?" His grandmother asked after the end of the meal.

"I. I think so. I think I need to make a couple of phone calls." He replied.

"Use any of the phones, dear. Maybe if you know someone who can keep an eye on the house."

"Yeah. I babysit for the chief of police sometimes, so I might call him. He'll make sure nothing happens."

"Good. And, if you're talking to that boy of yours, tell him that he's got to come up here for Christmas. I want to meet him, and make sure he's good enough for you."

"Grandma." Steve protested.

"I'm just saying." She replied before walking away.

Steve shut himself in one of the bedrooms, for a little privacy from the still crowded house while he made the calls. The call to Hopper was quick, just outlining what was going on, and Hopper agreed to keep a check on the house until Steve was back in Hawkins. Then it was the call to Eddie.

"Baby, I wasn't expecting you to call. How's your Thanksgiving?"

"Interesting. My parents decided to announce that I was going to propose to dad's business partner's daughter. They wouldn't accept that I wasn't interested in her so I accidentally came out."

"Shit, I hope that didn't go too bad?"

"Uh, it could have gone worse? Somehow me coming out got my parents removed from the will and kicked out of the house. Because my grandma wasn't happy with them being assholes about it."

"Oh, badass grandma. I kinda want to meet her now."

"I was hoping you would say something like that. Because she has told me that you have to come here for Christmas. She wants to make sure that you're good enough." Steve couldn't help smiling as he talked, somehow the day had gone so much better than he'd ever hoped.

[macfrog]

birds of a feather | joel & ellie

y'all listen to the new billie eilish album? there's a song that reminded me of a couple of someones.

pairing: joel miller & ellie williams summary: joel surprises ellie on her sixteenth birthday. warnings: nada. just me loving hard on this pair. word count: 1.5k

main masterlist | follow @macfroglets w notifs on to be the first to hear when i post 🤍

Oh, my god, it is a dinosaur.

She didn’t actually believe it would be. I mean, it was her first guess – but where the fuck is he going to find a dinosaur way the hell out here? She was kidding.

Wasn’t a convertible, wasn’t a puppy, wasn’t even a lotta kittens. A litter. Whatever. It wasn’t a new pair of sneakers, nor a comic book collection. She’d almost run out of ideas, when she spotted the tail through the bushes.

Is that–? Is he seeing this, too?

It’s, like, three times the size of her. No, wait – five times the size of her. Ten? She’s gotta ask Joel.

Two thick, stocky legs planted firm into the earth. Draped in ivy and spattered with moss – the thing actually looks prehistoric. Head lifted to the canopy; teeth bared in a silent roar. His little arms – alright, they’re actually kinda fuckin’ cute – frozen, reaching for something.

It’s right fucking there. Right in front of her. A motherfucking dinosaur.

Her hands fly to her head.

“Joel!” Ellie cries, and she can hardly feel her legs with giddiness.

Joel lingers a few steps behind her. He kicks a heel through the mucky grass, just watching. Smiling like an idiot, letting the ripples from the kid’s glee wash over him. It’s like the zoo all over again, or that time he found a Savage Starlight poster while out on patrol.

Ellie’s laughter is ticklish, vibrating through his veins. She pumps her fists and sizes up the monster. She says holy shit, Joel three times before she takes a step closer.

The sun trickles through the leaves, haloing over the Rex. It’s warm, but not too warm – and the swim on the way helped cool them down. It’s a bit of a hike to get here. He’s just glad it’s a nice day.

He was, truthfully, a little nervous about it. About bringing her here. He’s never had a sixteen-year-old to plan shit for. What if she didn’t like it? Hell, what if she thought it was fucking lame?

But Ellie wades waist-deep into the moat instantly. She pulls herself through the murky water straight to the plaque, and whips out her journal.

And Joel knows he’s fucking nailed it.

“King of the tyrant lizards,” she announces, making sure she gets the spelling right. Her tongue pokes from the corner of her mouth as she sketches.

Joel wanders over to her side, hand combing through the tangles of leaves drooping from the dinosaur’s belly. He swats fluttering flies away from his face.

The water sloshes around her feet as she rounds the tail. It’s slippery with slime. She crawls over threads and vines, soles scuffing up the spine.

“What are you doin’?” he asks, a chuckle patching over cracks of sudden fear.

“I’m climbing a dinosaur!” Ellie yells. She hesitates on the snout – though only for half a second, because fuck it, how many times am I going to jump off a motherfuckin’ dinosaur? – and then she’s plummeting.

Joel’s stomach flips. He staggers into the water, breath clamped in his throat until she resurfaces again.

She’s still wearing that dumb as shit smirk. It probably didn’t flinch, the entire fall. “Did you see that?” she gasps.

Jesus. Yeah, he saw it. He pulls a hand down his face.

It’s been a year, little less than. They’re used to it by now – the slow turn of life in Jackson. Breaking bread in the dinner hall, calling the woodland creatures by whichever ridiculous names Ellie christens them with.

It took a few weeks, but eventually, their heartrates settled. Their fists loosened. They relaxed into the quiet, found respite in the negative space.

Tommy joked for the first little while that Joel had a shadow he couldn’t shake. She’s five-three, red hair, and she carries a switchblade everywhere she goes. Following him close enough that she felt more like a phantom at his heels.

Joel never minded, and he still doesn’t. He’s long forgotten the feeling of being alone – as quickly as he acquired it, it seems. These days, he waits at his kitchen table for the kick of the backdoor, the slump of a still half-asleep teenager opposite him.

He wonders how he ever got by so long without it.

He leads Ellie into the museum.

Everything looks exactly how he left it. A jungle of a building; shattered glass and overgrown grass, a muggy smell lingering in every dim corner. The stuff he deliberately left for her to stumble upon when she got here: a Giants of the Past brochure, the stupid hat he knew she’d force him to wear.

A marshland wasteland, and she still sees the magic in every square inch.

She throws fact after fact at him. Fruit flies and moon landings, gunpowder and Yuri Gagarin. She knows a shit ton, if the stacks of books on her desk are anything to go by. And when Joel tells her how smart she is, Ellie smiles smugly to herself and thinks up ten more facts, just for him.

He thinks of her books and their awkwardly long titles, the faded pictures on all the covers. Astronauts and nebulas and faraway suns. He offers the one thing he remembers from school back at her: My very educated mother just served us nice pizzas.

She’s never even heard of it.

But she’s impressed, and she repeats it to herself as she explores some more. Turning back at every new artifact she finds, beckoning Joel over with a flapping hand.

He wanders after her, thinking up questions he’s sure he already knows the answers to – just so she can tell him again. Just to see her face light, to hear her ramble as she explains.

And nine times out of ten, she corrects him, anyway.

The space shuttle is spotlit under a dome roof, more ivy spilling over the top. A little heap of machinery, succumbed to the nature around it. They crank the door open together, and a springtime heat floods from the cockpit.

Joel stops Ellie from climbing in. “You’re goin’ into space,” he says, leaning on the warm metal. “You’re gonna need a helmet.”

Her eyebrows lift. “Oh, right. What was I thinking?”

They’re too big for her – all three helmets. They’re clunky and clumsy, the visors a little grubby and distorted. But she pulls one over her head and jogs back to Joel, hoisting herself into the shuttle.

It’s cramped inside; stifling even with the door wide open. Joel feels his back twinge as he settles into the seats. But he doesn’t mind, and neither does Ellie.

She flicks button after button, her elbow knocking against his. Explosion sounds rumbling from her lips. Her breath clouds the inside of her helmet.

He could lie here all day beside her. In this quiet corner of the world, where time stands still. Guarded by the Tyrannosaurus Rex out front. Just him and his kid, listening to her mimic engine noises and pretend to lift them both into space.

But he’s hellbent on timing it perfectly. So just as she sounds the roar of a seamless takeoff, he slips the tape from his chest pocket.

“Happy birthday, kiddo.”

Ellie blinks at the cassette. “What is this?”

“This…” Joel says, pinching it in two fingers, “…is a thing that took a mighty effort to find.”

His handwriting is carved into the label. It’s the first gift – real gift, birthday gift – she’s ever been given. Thought out and made up, addressed to her and placed in her hands for keeps. All hers.

She clicks it into her player and hooks her headphones in, thumping her helmet back over her head. She jams a thumb into the play button, and –

He did remember to rewind the tape, right? It’ll play from the start, won’t it?

Joel’s heart begins to thud. He shifts uncomfortably.

Shit, what if it spoils the surprise? What if she hits play, and the first thing she hears is –

Ellie’s head lifts. Her eyes are wide. She grins, and so does he.

He fucking nailed it.

She closes her eyes, the staticky babble of mission control in her ear. His voice tickles, pulling a wide grin across her face. 10, 9, 8, 7…

The shuttle shudders as it shoots into space. She’s holding her breath, holding until he announces liftoff on Apollo 11. The naked sun stretches over her visor, red under her closed eyelids. It disappears somewhere in the distance.

Ellie lands slowly, carefully, back in Wyoming. She blinks her eyes open.

Joel’s still right beside her, hands clasped on his chest. He waits for her to turn, waits to check her expression. He asks it softly, earnestly.

“I do okay?”

Her cheeks ache with smiling. She clutches the tape player tighter, replies through a giggle.

“Are you fucking kidding me?”

There might be nothing outside of this shuttle. Perhaps there was nothing to begin with. They might’ve shot straight past the earth’s atmosphere, might actually be among the stars. And it might not even matter, if they are.

Everything is right here. The sun and the moon – the entire universe between them.

Joel breathes a relieved laugh. His chest loosens, his heart settles back into place behind his ribcage.

“You’re welcome, kiddo.”

[envysparkler]

Dick had fucked up.  Dick had fucked up big time.

“Robin?” Dick tried, creeping through the gloom of the abandoned warehouse.  Machinery loomed out of the darkness like dusty jumpscares and there was a chilling, crawling feeling up the back of his neck.  “Robin, are you there?”

No sound.  Not even a whisper.  Demons were always very good at blending into the shadows.

“Robin, come back,” Dick called out into the darkness.

The crippling sensation of abandonment was his only answer.

Really, this whole thing was Bruce’s fault.  Not only had he replaced Dick, he’d replaced him with a demon.  A baby incubus that Dick was supposed to call brother.  Dick was justifiably wary of humanity’s greatest predators, never mind that his little brother had chubby little cheeks and an adorable scowl and a pout that Dick had to resist cooing at.  He was dangerous.

And doubly so under the influence of mind tampering chemicals.

Incubi under fear toxin could induce a heart attack with a touch, overloading people’s minds with fear until they died.  Dick had never met an incubus under the use of cuddle pollen, since Ivy mainly reserved that for the Bats, but he shuddered to think of what an emotion-sensitive demon would do when faced with the draining hunger for succor.

Luckily, Dick had met enough villains with mental manipulation to develop strong mental shields.  They’d snapped into place the moment he’d felt Robin’s clumsy grab for his mind, protecting him from mental intrusion.  He could’ve gotten Robin back to the Batcave and in a containment cell with no one—especially Bruce—the wiser.

Instead, Robin had bolted the moment Dick had cut him free of Ivy’s vines and Dick had no idea how to find him.  It was becoming increasingly likely that he’d have to call Bruce from his shift on the Watchtower and deal with the Disappointed Look that still made Dick cringe.

He could already hear Bruce now.  I asked you to watch over Gotham for one night, but I see that was beyond your capabilities.  The sneer was clearly visible in Dick’s mind.  I should’ve never called you back—you’re useless, pathetic, weak—

Dick froze.  “Robin?” he called out, barely a whisper.  The dread and terror hanging over his head weren’t his own.  The fear of being kicked out wasn’t his.  “Robin, are you there?”

The feeling of dread intensified.  Lurking behind it was hurt, a miasma that seemed to grow with every breath.  Pain and fear and abandonment and loneliness, all of it battling together in a spiral that tightened around Dick’s chest and sunk deep.

“Robin?” Dick called out again.  It was an old-fashioned game of hot-and-cold.  The thicker the emotions were, the closer he was getting.  Dick kept the mental block and slipped further into the warehouse.

The darkness seemed especially concentrated in the shadows behind an old conveyor belt.  Dick rounded the edge and headed for the corners, feeling the ache as the emotions pressed against his barrier.

He caught sight of the cape as the emotions solidified into specifics.

hates me hates me can’t stand the sight of me no one can they all hate me

I don’t want to be a demon I don’t want to be alone I just want to be loved why is it so hard why why

please please please please please please please it hurts please it hurts make it stop please please it hurts make it stop I can’t breathe please please please

I’m so hungry

it’s so cold

please help help please it hurts please please please please

“Oh, kid,” Dick breathed, crouching as he crept closer.  Robin was huddled into a tiny ball, cape tucked around him, shuddering violently.  “It’s okay.  It’s going to be okay.  C’mere.”

Robin didn’t move, but he didn’t jerk away at Dick’s careful touch at his shoulder, and Dick moved to envelop him in a hug.  He used slow, cautious movements and only relaxed when the kid was tucked up in his lap.

Robin was still rigid, not bending the slightest amount, breaths harsh and shaky.  Before Dick could figure out a more comfortable position for them both, something poked at his mental barrier.

Dick mentally reared back, reinforcing the block.  But it wasn’t an attack, it was…questing?  It slunk forward again, a wary little thread reaching out.  For an instant, Dick felt hurt please help big brother please?

Then the thread curled away, sagging at a lack of response, and the feeling of abandonment surged.

It was a stupid idea.  Dick was just compounding the bad decisions that had led them to this point.  He could already imagine Bruce’s lecture—did you seriously allow a demon access to your mind because you felt sorry for it—but he’d already made the decision.

Dick dropped the mental barrier.

It felt like cracking open a door he was trying to hold shut, warring with his own instincts as he deliberately lowered his guard.  The thread came back and, upon finding an open path, slithered inside.  Dick resisted the urge to kick it back out.

Dickie? came an inquisitive thought—it didn’t feel like a word mentally spoken, it felt like an impression, and when Dick reached out it, it was accompanied by a dazzling network of memories and emotions.  He was looking at himself from the outside, from the point of view of a little boy that wanted nothing more than his approval, that had placed Dick on a pedestal so high Dick was getting dizzy just experiencing it.

Jaybird, Dick tried crafting his own impression in response, shoving the resentment and irritation as far down as he could in the hopes that Jason couldn’t find it.  He bundled up all his hopes and wishes for a baby brother and flung it across the mental space.

One moment Jason was on the outside, peering in, asking for entry—and the next he was in, tangled up thoroughly with Dick’s emotions, rifling through his head like it was a flipbook.  Confusion and panic and fear flitted across Dick’s mind, slow like molasses, and were easily batted aside.  Comfort rose out of the tangle, and contentment, the lazy purr of a cat slumbering in a sunspot.

It felt good. Dick was…Dick was supposed to be doing something.  They were in a warehouse.  They…they had to get home?  But the warehouse was empty and everything was quiet here.

[slimybeth69]

Such Small Hands

unbeta'ed, cross posted from my ao3.

mean/dark!joelxreader (no physical descriptions girthy age gap--no actual age mentioned but reader could be in her mid twenties- early thirties, no use of y/n. No physical descriptions but reader has an extensive background. Canon to the last 3 episodes of the series.) Rating: Explicit Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence, mentions of potential SA, graphic depictions of blood, reader brings up her past and shitty family (if it ain't for you, sorry). This takes place after the events of Crybaby With as much smut as this has, this is an angsty fic and it's building bonds and falling in love (maybe). And Ellie!! Little Baby Ellie is in this one!

Chapter 2- Killers

“Are you sure you’re going to bed okay? You know what medicine you need to get? How do I know when to come looking for you if you don’t come back? What happens–” Ellie is rapidly firing these questions at you as you walk out of the house the next morning. You turn and put your hands on her shoulders. Ellie stares up at you, her eyes are so full of fear but they're scanning your face, hoping you'll have the answers. You do. For the most part.

“Listen– you’re gonna stay here. No matter what. You do not come looking for me. Under any circumstance. You stay here with Joel. You do not leave his side until he’s able to come with you. Do you understand?” You talk to Ellie in the most stern voice you have. “I know where to go. I know what to look for. I can take care of myself. Please, take care of yourself and Joel.” You hand her your pistol and show her how to use it quickly. 

Ellie watches intently. 

“It’s easier to aim. Point and shoot. It’s got kick to it though. It’s gonna knock you on your ass if you’re not prepared for it. Got it? Lock your arm when you shoot and don’t flinch. Do not use this unless you absolutely have to. Understood? I mean thing’s coming through that door kind of need to, do you hear me?” 

Ellie looks terrified. You give her a hug. 

“It’ll be okay. I’m not taking the horse because it’ll draw too much attention. It'll take me a while to get there and back but I’ll be back tonight, okay? I promise, I’ll do everything I can.” You squeeze her tightly and you feel her still holding on so you let her hug you as long as she needs. The sun still hasn’t even come up yet, so you have time. She needs it.

“Be careful.” Ellie says as she’s pulling away. “Please.” Her eyes look so wide and scared and almost full of tears. 

“I will be. You need to be careful too. Barricade this door when I leave. I’ll knock six times when I’m back.” 

The walk into the city is long and cold with only one glove but you’ll look for more in the department stores. You wonder if any of the medicine is still even good by now. It’s a stressful thought. You need more alcohol and some antiseptic. Anything that will make sure Joel doesn’t get an infection if he doesn’t already have one. 

Joel slept through the night and was still sleeping when you decided you couldn’t sit around any longer. You got changed into clothes covered in Joel’s blood. You’d look for a new outfit while you were in the city. You needed them anyway. Might as well. You loved going into the city– not this one; you were in New Jersey when the outbreak happened. But the Big City. NYC. You loved going there when you were a teenager. 

This didn’t feel like that though. There was something so ominous about the buildings towering overhead. Everything was so eerily quiet. Not like a city at all. A ghost city. An abandoned one. All the buildings were overtaken by plant growth on the first and second floors. It was starting up to the third now. You could barely see the signs over the doors of each store. The moss and vines and leaves covered it all up now. 

First place you found was a department store. Inside was dark, you had to use your flashlight to see anything. The first floor was mens and kids. You look for anything that might fit Joel and toss it in a bag you picked up on your way into the store. It’s just a simple backpack, nothing special but it was empty. You’re holding the flashlight between your jaw and shoulder while you look through sizes. You’re as quiet as you can be. Checking to make sure there isn’t anything under your feet before you step. 

Upstairs is for women and home-goods. You grab as many t-shirts that will fit you and Ellie both in the bag not caring if they’re cute or what they say. You look for jeans that will fit. You’re stuffing this bag as full as you can make it. This place hasn’t been picked too bad. There were no knives when you checked the home-goods department. 

You do end up looking for another bag, a duffel bag, a bigger one in the camping section. You find it and just toss the book bag into the bottom and wrap the strap around your back so you can just throw things into it without having to carry it in your hands. Cooking things and camping gear. Whatever you really need. You still have to carry it to the pharmacy and try to find something for Joel. 

As you make your way down the stairway that leads to the first floor you hear it. Clicking. You close your eyes and hope your imagination is just getting the best of you in here. It is really dark and fucking scary as hell. Fuck. You were hoping to avoid all this. Hoped they had all cleared outta the city by now.

Staying quiet, trying to hear where it's coming from you slowly keep moving down the stairs. Your flashlight is pointed to the floor so you don’t step on anything. The clicks continue to echo softly. The sound can’t really be placed as it bounces off the walls and back at you from every direction. 

Shit. Shit. Shit…fuck. Okay. Stillness. You stay as still as possible and with your flashlight scan the room below you very slowly. You don’t move too fast, just try and see if anything down there is moving. Time feels like it is standing completely still. More clicks but now it’s evident that they are coming from upstairs, from behind you and you take off quickly down the stairs, still as quiet as you can be. 

You have to walk so slow, there’s metal camping gear in your bag and one wrong move will send everything scattering around in there and you’ll be fucking caught. No way out. Your feet move with grace. Like when you walked through the woods to meet Joel. You need to get back to him…back to Ellie. The clicks are still behind you, maybe closer than last time but you tell yourself that it’s all in your head and you’re just freaking the fuck out. 

Okay, you’re out the door and across the street and you watch the entrance with your revolver aimed at the door you just came out of. You breathe steady and wait. You wait for so long until you’re convinced that it wasn’t following you. The revolver drops down to your side and you sigh loudly. You wait, still watching with your finger on the trigger just in case. Just in case it pops out and starts fucking barreling after you. 

Okay. You’re possibly in the clear. There are so many stores lining the street. While you walk you adjust the metal camping gear so it shouldn’t clang together should you have to move hastily. You spot a drug store and struggle to open the door with all the overgrowth. It’s a good sign. No one’s been in here for a while. 

Inside is picked through. You find a bottle of rubbing alcohol though. A big one. The makeup section is untouched. You grab Ellie two compacts and a nicer hairbrush than the one she had. There isn’t anything else inside. 

There isn’t anything else on this main street. You dip off into a side street and find an actual pharmacy. You walk inside, no overgrowth covering the door. You find Neosporin. Unopened. You could cry. Tears actually spring to your eyes. You open it out and squeeze some out onto your finger and smell it and it smells like Neosporin. Like your childhood. This is what you came here for. 

You tuck it into your front jacket pocket because it s precious and you leave this God fucking forsaken place. 

You’re running. As fast as you can with the duffel bag still strapped to your front which isn’t fast at all but you need to get back. You’ve been gone so long the sun is already up high in the sky. The sun shines off the snow and hurts your eyes. You never did look for new gloves. Completely forgot. 

When you get back the sun is lower, not dark but getting there. You’re glad you left as early as you did. You knock on the door six times and wait for her to answer. Nothing. You knock again a little louder. Nothing. You push on the door gently and it gives to your touch. Fucking kid . You enter the house with your gun drawn. Setting the duffel bag down next to the door, you check around the corner. Clear. 

The hallway is clear too. The door to the basement is shut. You open the door and whisper her name but get no response. What the fuck? Okay. Maybe they’re both asleep. You take the steps downstairs and check on Joel who is still asleep. Ellie isn't in either of the rooms down in the basement.

She’s not fucking here. God fucking dammit. What actual fuck kid? You gave her one fucking instruction. You wonder is she doesn't listen to Joel either. Ellie is a teenager, she doesn't listen to anyone.

The door upstairs opens and you hear heavy footsteps above you, they're frantic and running across the floor. You aim the gun at the door as it opens and put your finger on the trigger. You drop it immediately as Ellie stumbles down the stairs, missing three on her way down.

“Where the fuck where you? Huh? I told you to stay put!” You shout at her. She holds up wrapped up gray cloth in her hand and pants softly.

“I got it.” Ellie smiles wide at you.

“Got what!? Someones fucking underwear? Ellie where the fuck did you go?” You're shouting at her because you were scared and frantic about her not being there just two minutes ago.

She recants her time in the woods. Explains she went out to try and hunt so we could all eat tonight. She actually shot a deer but two men in the woods traded her medicine for Joel for the deer meat. You stare at her as she talks. You can't believe it.

Ellie hands you the bottle and the needle. You hold it in your hands, still unable to talk. The bottle of antibiotics is cold in your palm. 

“I don’t know how to do it.” She kneels down to Joel and puts a hand on his shoulder. "He needs it though. He has a fever." You knew he did. You checked him earlier and he was burning up. 

Joel is worth figuring it out for. Poking the needle into the top of the bottle you pull the liquid into the syringe until it looks like enough. You don’t know! You wanted to do hair for God's sake! Not be a nurse. 

Your hands are shaking as you inject him with the antibiotic. You lean down and whisper into his ear.

“You get better soon. Don’t leave me with the kid. She doesn’t listen to me.”

You and Ellie go and sit with your backs against the wall. She mirrors you when you pull your knees and rest your arms on them. You sigh deeply and try to pretend like none of this is really happening. This is what happens when you think with anything other than your brain. You were thinking with your pussy and this is what you get. Bloody clothes and a near dead man on the bed across the room and some new teenage girl who’s looking at you for answers. 

“These guys with the medicine? You know where they stay?” You’re whispering to Ellie while Joel rests. She nods at you. “You could tell me how to get there?” If you can get there and scope things out you might be able to see what you’re up against. You wonder if Ellie did a good job hiding her tracks back here or not. 

“I could show you.” Ellie raises her eyebrows. She wants to take you there. You frown at her. What is she thinking? Leaving Joel here all alone? Obviously she wasn’t thinking, she’s just a kid. Trying to prove to the two adults she’s with that she can help. That she’s grown too. Not just a kid.

“Do you think this is an adventure? Is this fun to you? Those guys are probably looking for you right now.” You keep frowning as the small smirk disappears from her face. “Good. I’m glad you know I’m serious now since you didn’t seem to know earlier.” You’re so angry. You know she was just trying to help but it’s just made everything so much harder. Even if she did get the medicine. 

“I got the medicine that you couldn’t get.” She growled at you angrily, like she was reading your mind. Ellie had that comeback ready before you even started talking to her. She knew what she did was wrong but she was trying to justify it. 

“I hadn’t even left before you went off hunting in the woods, doing exactly what I told you not to.” You snap at her, pointing to the door. This is what your mom must have felt like when she’d find out you snuck out with your boyfriend to go into the city for a show or for dinner without asking or telling. You know why she was so scared now. The world was not a nice place for fourteen year old girls. You didn’t know that then. Ellie doesn’t know that now.

“He was going to die without it.” She keeps growling. The face she’s making at you is similar to the ones she’d make when Joel and her picked you up before you all left Wyoming. You got on the horse he brought for you and you’d catch her giving you looks just like this one out of the corner of your eye. Her face would be pressed right into Joel’s back looking at you like you were a clicker or a bloater. Or something worse. A threat to her and Joel’s plan.

“What you did was very helpful. Yes. But it doesn’t change the fact that you still didn’t take me seriously. Ellie. Those guys could have done so much worse than just kill you.” You shake your head because you don’t know if she gets that. “I just want you to be safe so that when he wakes up, he doesn’t kill me for losing you.” You point to Joel in the bed across the room. He’s kind of scary, you’re not going to lie. You’d hightail it out of here and back to Jackson before he woke up if anything happened to her. You did not want to be on his bad side. You were already on his good side and look at the things he did to you.

“I’m not going to get lost. Or killed. Or worse. ” More growling like she’s tough. “I’m strong-” You snort in a short burst of chuckling because she sounds just like you did. It’s insane listening to her talk. Listening her argue; saying she’ll never let that happen to her– she has no control over those things and you’re surprised she thinks she does. It makes you embarrassed for how you used to talk to your mom or your aunts growing up. You’re just trying to help her. 

“I’m so glad that you know exactly what’s going to happen out here. I’m so glad that in your fourteen years of life that you just know everything you need to know. I’m so fucking happy.” It’s a whisper. “I was your age once. I get it–but you have no fucking idea what’s going to happen when you walk out that door. You need to remember that you’re not un-fucking-touchable. You can get hurt. You don’t know.” You glance over at her, because you haven't looked at her once. You’ve been too upset and frustrated and worried that if you looked at her you might cry.

“And you do?” She snaps back now. 

“I have no fucking idea what’s going to happen. But I know what can .” You do start to cry because you’re overwhelmed. The last however many hours have passed are finally catching up to you. “I know what will happen to little girls like you and women like me if men who are fucked-” You tap your head. “Or desperate-” you tap between your legs. “-could do if they wanted. You better hope your aim has gotten better since the other day.” You push yourself off the ground and walk away from her. You can’t look anymore. You don’t want to say anything you’ll regret.

“I know what you’re talking about and I would never -” You spin around so fast it makes you dizzy.

“I hope you never have to try and overpower a man who is holding you down.” You whisper it even though you want to scream at her. “I have to sleep now. Please for the love of God, don’t fucking leave.” 

You lay down in the bed Ellie had slept in the night before. It’s soft. And it has blankets and it’s perfect. You think of living here. Forever. With Ellie and Joel. It would be nice to cozy up and relax and play house. You always wanted to do that. Imagining the idea of giving Joel kisses as he walked into the kitchen as you helped Ellie with her homework are the thoughts that lulled you to sleep. You slept for fourteen hours. 

Ellie is fucking gone when you wake up. Of fucking course. You should have never fallen asleep but whatever. You’ll go get her. She can’t be too far, right? Joel is still asleep. Fuck.

Fuck. It’s fucking bitter cold and now you regret not going back for a new pair of gloves. You run out into the street and look in both directions. She’s running from the right and pointing to get back inside. You shake your head and motion for her to get her ass over here right the fuck now.

“We– yo– we– they’re coming.” Ellie stutters. “They’re coming to look for us.”

Fuck! You press your hands into your eyes and hold back a shout of frustration. Hands fall to your sides and Ellie is gone again, she’s running up to the garage. 

“Where are you going?” You follow her as she opens the door. 

“I can get away. I’ll distract them. You gotta stay here and keep Joel safe. Please. I won’t be able to do it myself. Please just keep him safe and the horse will take me far away and then we can-” She’s already on the horse and you don’t know what else to do. 

“How many?” You ask, pulling your revolver from your holster and checking how many bullets are in there. It’s still full from this morning. 

“I don’t know, maybe six or seven.” She’s whining looking out the open garage door. 

“Okay. Okay. Fuck. Okay. Yes. Go. Run Ellie don’t fucking stop please don’t stop. Run and get as far away from here as you can. Run until the horse won’t fucking go anymore.” You’re pleading with her. She looks down at you with fear in her eyes again. “We’ll come for you. I promise Ellie no matter what happens we will come for you.” 

You slap the horse's ass and she takes off. 

Shit shit shit shit shit. You shut the garage door as fast as you can and run inside. Fuck. Everything inside of you is shaking. You need a knife. They’re probably in pairs. You can fucking do something, right? Ambush them, something. Fuck. You’re by Joel’s side now and you’re crying. 

“Please wake up. P-Please wake up. I’m so fucking scared right now.” Your head turns to the door leading down to the basement. You forgot to shut it. “Joel!” You exclaim and his eyes open just a little. “Joel, they're coming, you need to w-wake up.” You leave your revolver on his chest and grab the knife off his belt and run upstairs. You get to the top step and you peek around the corner. You never shut the front fucking door when you ran inside like a dumb fucking idiot. 

You step up into the hallway that leads down to the front door and as you go to shut it you see someone step right outside, looking in at you from the screen door. 

It makes you jump and he’s got the door open before you can shut and lock the big wooden door in your hands. He pushes back against it with force and you stumble back two or three steps and he opens the door fully. His boots thump loudly on the ground. 

“No. You fucking stay away from me or I’ll cut your fucking throat.” You warn him, holding up the knife. The man in the hat with the long beard and hunting overalls takes a couple more steps towards you. He’s holding a hunting rifle across his chest. 

“Oh baby. My brother’s right outside. He’ll be in before you know it. Then that knife won’t mean shit.” The man grins at you. You go to reach for your revolver but it’s fucking downstairs on Joel’s chest. “Aw, you lose somethin’ important?” His grin widens and he’s got dirty yellow teeth, almost brown.

“Your brother as ugly as you are? If so, damn, I’d hate to see your mommy.” You frown at him. “Unless daddy is the ugly one.” You sass him, looking him up and down. 

“Oh you got a mouth on ya, huh?” The man finally smiles and nods at you. “Love a cunt with a mouth.” His smile drops and he starts coming at you with force. You hold the knife close to you and as he gets close you swing it around and try to connect with his ribs. He holds his arm out and tries to catch your wrist but he misses and you end up slashing across his chest. “Fuckin’ dumb bitch.” He growls.

“You sound like my daddy.” You smirk and he lunges at you, pinning your arm with the knife between you and him. You still try and wave it around wildly and can feel it slashing and cutting at your own stomach so you stop. “Fuc-” All the air in your body leaves. All the air that was about to enter your body suddenly has somewhere else to be. You don’t even remember past air that you have breathed before. The man knocked you to the ground and he’s on top of you.

“You’re gonna get it from both of us.” He snarls in your ear. “Gonna fuck you all night long then bring you back to all the other hungry men that we know. Let them all have their way with you. Just like the girl. She yours? She your little one? We caught her. We’re all gonna rape her.” The man whispers now. “Gonna rape your daughter.” He sings it to you now sweetly like it’s a tune on the radio.

You’re fighting with everything inside of you. Your boots slam on the floor under you, attempting to push your hips up to knock him off of you but he’s got his whole weight on top of you and the rifle pressed across your chest. You feel him start rocking his hips against yours and everytime he does the blade of the knife digs deeper into the soft flesh of your belly. You start to scream but one of his dirt stained hands stops you.

You see his brother walk downstairs and that's when real fear starts to hit you. Joel is going to die.

“Ohh no. You gotta be quiet. You have to be quiet. You don’t wanna get me too excited now. I love when they fight back. It’s my favorite. You’ll embarrass me. Make me come too quick. We don’t want that now do we?”

There is no way this is happening. You were tucked away safely in your little cabin in the woods when the guy you were fucking invited you to escort a young lady to Salt Lake. Now you’re about to be passed around and watch Ellie suffer while Joel dies in a basement. What the fuck. You start to cry because this is not really happening. No fucking way. You clench your eyes shut.

His hips start moving with meaning and the knife just digs in deeper and deeper. It’s pressed sideways, not stabbing into you, but with every movement it’s cutting into you like a saw. You whimper in pain and fear and acceptance that you’re probably going to die. The guy on top of you is dry humping you and there’s nothing you can do about it. You keep trying to push up with your hips to move him, despite the pain, despite the blade. You don’t want to die like this. 

“Just gotta wait for my brother to get up her–” His voice and his weight is torn from on top of you and your eyes shoot open and Joel is standing there, holding the man by the back of the neck with your gun to his head. 

“Let’s go.” Joel growls. You jump up and grab the rifle from the man and hold it close to your chest. You follow them as he leads the man into the front room. There is snow piled up in front of one of the open windows. You hold the rifle to him as Joel sits him down in a chair. “Your brother is in really bad shape downstairs. I’m gonna go get him. I need you to stay here.” Joel brings the butt of the revolver down hard on the front of the man's skull and you wince, watching him go limp.

“What are you doing?” You ask as Joel walks past you. “Where are you going?” 

“Were you not listening?”Joel grunts as he makes his way into the basement. “Stay!” He exclaims. “Don’t take that fucking gun off him for nothing, do you hear me?” He demands you the way you tried to demand Ellie to stay put earlier. You nod and turn the gun back to the unconscious man in the chair. 

Joel is struggling bringing that man's brother up the stairs. You can hear him grunting and you just know you’re going to have to restitch him. You hear a loud bang, like something or someone fell into the wall at the top of the stairs. You hope it’s the man’s brother. Joel drags the across the room by his feet. He’s got duct tape around his wrist.

“Okay.” Joel sighs, he used an entire roll of duct tape to tape them up. Once they were nice and secure Joel took the hunting rifle from you. “Where is she?” He asked, he was angry. 

“She took off with one of the horses. Tried to distract them away from us long enough that I could get you on the other horse and meet up with her.” You try to explain but Joel clenches his jaw.

“You let her go alone?” He yells at you.

“What did you want me to do? Leave you!? She’s got my gun and the horse. You were fucking knocked out! ” You yell back at him. You knew he was going to be mad at you. “It was her fucking idea! I didn’t know what else to do, okay!? I just wanted you to be safe and get her the fuck out of here.” 

“Go outside. Make sure no one else gets close to this house. You shoot whoever walks up near here unless it’s Ellie.” He gives you the hunting rifle. Okay Joel. Fuck you, too. You’ll go outside and walk back to fucking Jackson. Almost died trying to protect him. Protect the girl. Fuck him. 

You take the rifle from him and as his hand leaves it he snakes it around the back of your neck and pulls your forehead to his lips. He holds you there for such a long time. It feels so good because he’s warm and has a fever, also because it’s nice to know he doesn’t hate you. 

“Go. Eyes peeled.” You wait outside for him. 

You hear everything from the open window. Joel is asking them where Ellie would be. The men admitted to him they had captured her after Joel shoved a knife behind one of the mens knee caps. You heard him do it and then explain he was going to “pop it off’. The sound the knife made when it left his knee was something you’ll never forget. The sound the man made too.  

“What were you gonna do to the lady once your brother got upstairs, huh?” Joel speaks quieter now but not quietly enough that you can’t hear him. 

“Nothin’ man. I promise. Nothin’ we were just going to bring her back to the town.” The man sounds so nervous. You would look if you weren’t afraid of Joel doing the same thing to you. 

“That's why you were already halfway done when I ripped you off her?” Joel shouts. It makes you jump and there's a commotion inside. It sounds like someone fell. Someone’s being beaten. Someone else is screaming bloody murder. You run inside to make sure that Joel is okay but you’re greeted with the sight of him towering over the man he had taped to the chair, stabbing his knife into his chest repeatedly. His brother, who Joel had taped up and sat down on the bench of a piano. 

The man in front of the piano was screaming and crying and you’re terrified watching the scene unfolding before you. 

“Make him stop!” The man who wasn’t getting stabbed repeatedly in the chest screamed at you. “We told him where the girl was, make him stop!” The man wailed, watching his brother unable to fight back. Joel ripped the knife out of his chest cavity with a squelch and started towards the other man, looking at you over his shoulder.

“I said outside!” It was shouted at you loudly. You nod and turn; feet shuffling in place for a moment before you ran back outside, not wanting to see what Joel was going to do to him. 

You make your way to the garage, looking around to see if anyone else was coming to look for the brothers but you didn't see anyone. The horse in the garage snorts loudly as you pet him. The bitter cold nips at your cheeks and forehead. Your exposed fingers. You stand in front of the garage, waiting for something. You don’t know what exactly. 

“When I fucking tell you something, you better fucking list-” Joel’s voice from the front porch makes you whip your head around. It takes you less time for him to step down off the porch to get angry. Spitting and screaming and yelling angry at Joel.

“Shut the fuck up!” You shout, interrupting him. “Shut the fuck up right now. You don’t get to boss me around like I’m fourteen years old. Fuck you.” You spit at him. “I almost died trying to fucking keep you safe, we both did!” You’re holding the rifle close to your chest, your other hand pointing out behind you somewhere in the direction that Ellie could be in. “Don’t fucking yell at me like I’m a little fucking girl! Go, go and find her. By yourself! I'm not staying here. I didn't sign up for this! I’m going home.” You push past him and start back into the house.

Joel grabs you by the upper arm and pulls you back so you’re standing in front of him again. His eyes are so angry. They're so bloodshot like he should still be sleeping. He really should be. He’s not ready to travel, he definitely shouldn’t have been exerting himself so much inside either. 

“You stay.” He growls. “You wanna go back? I'll take you after we drop the kid. You’re not going without me, are you fucking thick?” Joel leans in and tries to kiss your forehead again but you pull away. Joel grips you tighter. “I need you.” He whispers now. “I need you to help me get her back. I can’t fucking go get her like this by myself.” His voice has a hint of desperation to it. You look down and see that he’s bleeding through his shirt. 

“Fuck.” You whine quietly

“You went into the city by yourself?” Joel needed you to stitch him again, he stayed awake for the whole thing. You gave him another round of antibiotics and you gave him some clean clothes you picked up from the store. Joel shook his head as he pulled the new shirt on carefully. You nod and hand him the new flannel as well. They both fit. 

“Yeah. I did.” You look at Joel who is buttoning the flannel. He looks so tired. So worn down. You feel so bad for him. This is all your fault. If you had just stayed with him in the room at the university none of this would have happened. 

“You two always wanting to run off by your fucking selves.” Joel grumbles as he sits down on the side of the bed that you and Ellie had slept in. “You okay? You’re covered in blood.” He nods to you and you look down. You haven’t changed your clothes yet at all and you're still covered in his blood. 

“Yeah, I’m fine. It’s yours. I got some new clothes for me and Ellie in the bag.” You sigh and rub your hands down your face. “This is so fucked. What is going on? What are you doing with her? She’s clearly not your daughter and you’re taking her somewhere, right? Tell me what’s going on or I’m out. I’ll take my chances alone on the way back, man, I mean it.” You’re talking quickly, nervously. All you want is some answers and your warm cottage in the woods. What the fuck is going on?

“It’s too difficult to explain right now. I will though, when we get her back, ok?” Joel isn’t telling you the truth. You can hear it in his lying ass voice. You roll your eyes. “You just have to tru-” You chortle and shake your head at him. 

“No. I don’t. I don’t have to do anything right now. I want answers. I want you to tell me where you’re taking her and why we couldn’t all just hang out at my house outside the compound. Why is she so important to you? She your niece or something?” Joel shakes his head at you. “Okay. I’m leaving. I can’t fucking do this anymore.” 

“She’s fucking immune. I’m taking her to a hospital so they can try and find a cure.” Joel grumbles it out, defeated that you’re serious. Calling his bluff. You think for a long time before you turn around to look at him. 

“You’re gonna let them kill her?” You ask in horror. You can’t believe that the man you’ve been fucking is going to help an innocent girl right into her own coffin. 

“They’re not going to kill her. They need her DNA.” Joel waves you away with his hand dismissively.  “Not gonna kill her, are you stupid?” He scoffs at her like he hadn’t thought about it once. You’re dumbstruck. 

“It’s a disease that controls your fucking brain, Joel. If she’s immune, where do you think they’re going to want to look!? Do you think they give a shit about one fucking girl when it comes to the rest of us? Everyone else they could save? They’ve sacrificed so many people already who they claimed to be immune, a teenage girl isn’t going to be high up on their list of people to keep alive.” You’re yelling at him. You can’t believe that those thoughts didn’t go through his mind. Maybe wishful thinking on his part that he’d be able to keep up whatever weird fantasy they were both fulfilling in this journey. 

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.” Joel waves again at you, dismissively like you’re stupid and couldn’t ever possibly know what you’re talking about. You smirt at him and nod your head. 

“You’re gonna be sorry when you walk her into wherever she wants to get to so bad and they don’t let her come out, Joel. Really fucking sorry you didn’t listen to me. She knows? She knows the people where you're taking her are going to experiment on her?” You go for your bag on the floor and start packing all the things that have spilled out over however many days you’ve been here. 

“Yes. She knows.” Joel says quietly, like he’s processing what you just said finally. You nod and grab the hunting rifle that’s leaning against the wall. “Where are you going?” 

“To get her, and fucking keep her away from wherever you’re going to take her. They will kill her dude. You don’t get it.” You shake your head and make your way to the stairs. 

“If you’re going, I’m coming with you. And she’s going to the hospital so that we can find a c-” 

“We won’t ever see a cure in our lifetime, Joel!” You scream it at him. “Probably not in her lifetime either, so why– this girl you’re so attached to– why take her to a place that’s going to hurt her?” You don’t get him at all.

“We’ll go get her. Together. While we’re on the way you can tell me more about why you think they’re going to kill her.” 

As you walk, you explain to Joel how your dad used to work for animal control back in Jersey before the outbreak. You tell Joel about how scientists would have to look inside an animal's brain to check for rabies. He explains he knows how they check for rabies. You ask how he would expect them to do any sort of tests or experiments on Ellie for a disease that affects the brain? They need to look at your brain, and you can’t be alive for them to do that. We don't have the equipment now for scans and images. They'd have to kill her, you're sure of it.

Joel says nothing as you walk. What the man on top of you had sang while he dry humped you rings through your head.

“We’re gonna rape your daughter.”  

It makes you sick to your stomach. You quicken your pace even though Joel is the one who knows where to go. You don’t care, you want to get there as fast as you can. You think about Ellie and what she’s dealing with all alone with whoever the fuck has her. 

“Listen to me,” Joel grabs your face with his hands and makes you look right into his eyes. “Be. Careful. Watch your back. Stay quiet and calm. You get back to me as soon as you can. Check every room in that building, then you come back. If you can’t find her we will go look together.” Joel gives you very clear instructions that feel a little condescending but you’ll explain how calm and cool and collected you stayed while he was stuck like a pig.  

“I will.” 

The building behind you has smoke coming out of it. Joel tried to insist on coming in with you but you threatened to punch him in his stitches and explained he would just slow you down. You could get in fast and hopefully find her before the building got anymore engulfed in flames. 

You run into it, revolver drawn. It’s quiet but you can hear fire crackling down the long hallway. The place must have been a rec center or a nursing home or something. So many rooms and so many places for Ellie to hide. 

You don’t have to look in more than three rooms before you hear her–screaming. Crying. She sounds like she’s hurt. You bolt out of the room you were in looking for her and run down the hallway as fast as your feet can carry you. 

“Ellie!” You shout as you enter what looks like a dining hall, a giant room with tables and chairs for everyone to gather around and eat meals together. The whole place is engulfed in flames but you don’t see her anywhere. “Ellie!” You shout again and finally as your eyes scan the room you see her, on her knees, slamming her fists into… a man on the ground below her. She has a knife and she’s driving it into every soft part of him she can find. 

You run to her; as soon as you put your hand on her back she brings the blade back down into your calf. The knife sinks into the muscle and it sets fire to your brain. Shooting electric, white hot pain in your calf, unlike anything you've ever felt in your entire life.

“Fucking cunt bitch! Fuck!” You scream and push her away from you. She rips the knife from your calf, it makes you scream again in pain and you drop to your knees. “Ellie it’s just me.” You choke it out through sobs of pain. But she’s back to stabbing the man below you. 

You push yourself up to your feet again despite your leg telling you to lay down and die in this fire. Waiting until her arms are down to her sides you lunge forward and you wrap your arms around her. She screams and tries to fight you, she pushes back with her legs and sends you both tumbling back to the ground. She’s on top of you but you have her pinned and are squeezing her tight. The wind got knocked out of you when she landed on your chest and you're wheezing now. 

“Ellie, shhhhh, Ellie it’s just me. Me and Joel. Shhhh Joel is here, he’s okay.” You try to wheeze calmly in her ear but she’s still fighting you. She cuts your outer thigh with the blade as she slashes around. “Ellie! Joel is outside!” You scream now and something about your voice or what you just said calms her. She goes limp in your arms and is sobbing now, just shaking and weeping. You let her go and roll her to her side. She goes fetal. 

You grab her but now your entire leg is on fire. Your calf is bleeding so bad you can feel the pool of blood in your boots pooling up around your sock with every step you take. The slices on your thigh are deep but not stab wounds but they still fucking hurt. She lets you pull her to her feet. Ellie takes off, starts to quickly head for the exit but you can’t move as fast as she can. You're moving slow, having to hold on to the backs of chairs and tables to move along the dining hall. The flames are getting bigger and hotter and now you're starting to sweat. Ellie notices, she comes back for you and puts her arm around your waist. You lip out of the burning building as quickly as you can. The smoke is so much thicker now than it was when you came in. You’re almost choking. 

Once outside your hands and knees hit the snow. You can’t help it, everything in your right leg is absolutely screaming at you to stop. Ellie tries to help you up, screaming words of encouragement to you through sobs. You’re crawling along the ground, trying to get away from the building, from the smoke but it’s slow going. You can barely move your leg. Smoke pours out of the open door behind you and you can hear the structure start to creak and groan. 

“Please come on. We have to go. Please come on.” Ellie cries softly. She’s in front of you, pulling you by the shoulders of your jacket, away from the building. You move your arms and your one good leg to try and help her pull you away. She's yanking on your jacket as hard as she can, dragging you into the snow. 

You lay on the white snow as she falls down in front of you. Ellie is content with how much distance you two have put between yourself and the fiery hell behind you. You’re panting, face in the snow, you don’t care. You curl your fingers in the white powder as you close your eyes. You could die here, right now. It'd be okay. It’s pretty here. Very pretty. Lots of trees. Like the woods kind of. Like where your cabin used to be. You think you are dying. You've never felt weak like this before. Or so tired. 

There’s a hand on your back and you’re fighting for your life again, someone's got you. Someone's coming to get you, rape you and make you watch as they kill Ellie slowly and burn Joel on the stake. You're scrambling, trying to get to your feet, crawl away, anything. Just move. The only thought in your head is to move. Get away. Ellie is in front of you with her hands on your cheeks, shhing you. Trying to calm you. You rest your head in her hands and sigh softly. 

“It’s Joel. He’s gonna help you.” She whispers in your ear. You let Joel get you to your feet. You can only hop on one foot. You stumble and trip but Joel stays glued to your side.

Joel has your pants off inspecting all of the wounds you received or inflicted upon yourself today. The worse one by far is where Ellie stabbed you in the calf. She sank it fully into you. She apologized so much as you guys made your way back to the house you had been sleeping at. Ellie and Joel packed up everything while you sat in the living room staring at the two dead men. Joel moved you three to another house two streets over. Ellie was in a bedroom down the hall asleep already.

“How’d you get these?” He asked as he cleaned the cuts and slashes on your stomach. You chuckle at him and lean against the headboard. 

“Did it myself when that asshole was on top of me.” You laugh quietly. “Thought I could cut him but I ended up just cutting myself.” Joel smirks at you and then frowns. He’s got something he wants to say but he’s stopping himself. You let him bandage you, without pushing it. Why push something you don’t really want to hear. 

“Sorry for bringing you out here.” Joel finally sighs. “I never should have asked you to come.”

There it is. 

Not exactly what you wanted to hear but it’s fine. A thank you would have been nice. A good job. You did good, girl. He gives you nothing. You chew at the inside of your lip and think about Ellie. What will happen to her if Joel says you should go back to Jackson? She dies. That’s what happens and you’ll never forgive yourself. 

“I’m staying. Whether you like it or not. And in the morning I’m telling her what those doctors might do to her. I’ll do that even if you try to stop me.” You look at him very seriously as he pressed gauze to your stomach. He starts to tape it to your skin as you speak to him. “I don’t care. I’m gonna tell her. She deserves to know.” You continue to watch him as his hand slide down your stomach to your exposed mound. 

“Oh I’m not going to try to stop you.” Joel whispers. “I’ll let her decide. You have a point. Spread’em.” He tilts his head to one side as his fingers slide down into your folds. You obey mindlessly, spreading your legs slowly. “You can be the good girl…this time.” He smirks at you and slides the two fingers into your entrance. Your jaw drops open as he curls them upwards. “Yeah, you’re a good girl.” He whispers. “C’mere crybaby.” 

You lean forward and Joel meets you halfway, exhaling loudly against you as your lips touch. It’s perfect. His tongue slipping into your mouth while he furls and unfurls his fingers against your g-spot slowly. One of your hands wraps around the back of his neck, holding you up to him as he leans between your legs. You part your lips and let his eager tongue start exploring your mouth. How did you go from scolding him and being mad at him while he cleaned and bandaged you, to now letting him get you off with his fingers? 

“When I’m done, you can ride it, if your legs are strong enough.” Joel whispers into your mouth. “I want you to. Wanna see you naked. Touch you.” His tongue slides back into your mouth as his fingers strum against your spot. “Wanna see you come on top of me.” He’s still whispering gruffly into your mouth, speaking around the delight filled gasps of pleasure as he strokes one out with each curl of his fingers.

It would feel so nice to have him inside you. The feeling he’s giving you right now is numbing the pain in your leg. You nod and he kisses you again, long open mouthed kisses that leave you wanting more when he pulls away. 

“You wanna come?” Joel whispers again, moving his fingers quicker inside of you. “I’ll let you. I’d let you do whatever you want tonight for taking such good care of me. For keeping her safe.” He murmurs again. Joel is moving his fingers with such grace inside you. Each movement presses or grazes something inside you that draws a moan from your throat. You hush them, but you don’t hold back. “Yeah, lemme hear you. Little bird, pretty girl, lemme hear you moan.” He’s kissing you as he speaks. You can barely think let alone kiss him back.

It’s building, you can feel it deep in your belly. Your hips start to rock against his hand. Something about the way he’s talking to you is making your head spin. 

“I do wanna come.” You whimper, your feet locking onto the bed, and pushing your hips up into his fingers. You don’t care that your leg is on fire, his fingers feel too fucking good. “Yes. Yes, please don’t stop.” You beg him quietly. You clench your eyes shut and your walls start to tighten around him. “Please please.” It’s said mindlessly because he isn’t stopping, and didn’t have any plans to until you came. 

Thing you don’t know about Joel is, you coming is his favorite thing. It’s why he became so enamored with you after your first meeting. He’s never met anyone who can do what you do. Not come the way you do. The way you gush against him. He had heard stories, from Tommy and other guy friends he had before the outbreak but you’re the first and only one he’s ever been with. Joel loves when you come. 

That feeling; pressure in your belly and in between your legs is about to spill over the edge. You can feel it. You let your head fall back against the pillows again. Your hand falls from the back of Joel’s neck and you grip the sheets below you. Your back arches and your walls clenched tightly. 

“Oh fuck.” You pant. “Oh Joel, yes.” It’s so breathless as he draws the orgasm out of you with his fingers. It’s light behind your eyes and breath hitching in your chest. All the good feelings you could ever have are flowing through you right now and they’re all because of Joel’s fingers. You give him exactly what he’s waiting for as he continues to move his fingers through your orgasm. The gushing. He can watch it from here, see it happen as it splashes out against his palm and wrist. It soaks the blankets below you

“That’s a good girl.” Joel smiles, looking up at your face now. His fingers are still working inside of you. “You wanna sit on it? You want me to fill you up?” Your eyes snap open and Joel’s nodding at you. “I will. I’ll fill that pretty pussy all night long if you want me to.” He’s cooing at you, his fingers finally withdrawing from you. He laps up everything you’ve given him this time. He doesn’t even offer you his fingers like always. 

You watch as he stands up and undoes his belt. His pants fall to the floor and he very carefully crawls over you. This bed is big enough for the both of you. Unlike the mattress on the floor in the basement at the other house. Joel sits up in bed and pulls his shirt off carefully. You see his bandages. He’s bled through them but not terribly. Joel turns to you and takes your shirt off after you’ve sat up. Now, besides your bandages you’re both naked. 

“You are so fucking beautiful.” Joel pants out in between more long kisses. Tongues swirling as he gropes your breasts with his strong, calloused carpenter hands. “Such a pretty little crybaby. C’mere. Come sit on it. I gotta be inside you.” He breaks the kiss and lays back on the bed.

You’re unsure how you’re going to do this. Now that you’re not orgasming, your leg does hurt again. 

“I’m not gonna be able to do anything up here. I’ll just be scooching. I can’t bounce!” You look down at him as you test sitting on your knees.

“ Crybaby . Scooch on me. I’ll come. You’ll come. We’ll sleep.” Joel’s hands are on your waist as you straddle him.  He moves one hand between you two and keeps himself standing straight up as you move the head of him across your slit, trying to line him up with your entrance. Joel’s never let you be on top before. You’ve never really had time like this. You feel him slip inside of you and you sink down into his lap. You can watch how his jaw falls open a little this time. You feel so full like this. You relax and sink down a little further and now you’re both staring at each other, slackjaw. 

“Fuck. Good girl.” Joel places his hand back on your waist and starts to slide you back and forth. “Yeah, just like that.” His head falls back as you lean back, supporting yourself on his thighs. “Move those hips, little bird.” He coos at you as you begin to roll your hips back and forth against him. “The best sluttiest fuckin’ pussy I ever had.” 

You close your eyes, a mixture of pleasure and pain as you feel him move against every inch of your pussy. 

“Jesus Christ.” You whisper, your own head falls back as he pushes his hips up into yours. “Yes. Do it again.” You hold yourself still and quickly, Joel hammers himself into you from below. Nothing comes out of your open mouth, you’re just frozen on top of him. He sheathes himself to the hilt every time and groans loudly. 

“Fuck little bird, that pussy is so fucking perfect.” He’s panting softly after exerting himself. You go back to rocking yourself against him, hips gyrating slowly. “You want it, really? Come inside that slutty little cunt?” You nod, everything he’s saying sounds so fucking good. You’re close to another orgasm and he can tell the way you’re clenching down around him with your pussy. 

Joel’s ready, he wants to feel you come on him first before he lets go. But with this angle he can see himself sliding in and out of you, your slickness is coating both of you and it’s making his legs shake softly. 

“P-please, lil crybaby.” Joel moans softly. “Lemme fill you up.” He’s begging you. He’s never done that. You don't know if he’s ever said the word please to you either but you’ll think about it later. You’re going to cum again. Joel grips your waist tighter as he feels you getting ready. Your hands grip his thighs tighter, your walls clench around him. “Oh fuck. Yes. Come on me, baby. Come on this cock you filthy little slut.” Joel growls as he begins pumping inside of you. You feel it with every throb of his cock. 

It sends you over the edge, knowing he’s coming inside you. You come again, all over his lower stomach as you sink yourself down into his lap and ungulate your hips back and forth, his cock rubs and grazes across your g-spot with each movement. It makes you shiver and moan his name softly as your hands move up to his chest.

Joel’s hands are still on your hips, holding you down onto him as he gives you the last of him. You know he’s finished when he shudders underneath you and lets his head fully relax on the pillows below him. 

“Joel.” You whisper down to him in his post-coital bliss. He responds with a throaty humm, his eyes closed. “I’m stuck up here.” Sure are. Your leg is on fire and you’re cramped up and don’t know how to get down. Joel opens one eye and smirks. He holds you firmly under the breasts and sits up carefully due to his own wound and gives you a small kiss before he lifts you so you can swing one leg over him. 

“Crybaby.” Joel teases you as you crawl onto the bed. It’s so cold but you know he’ll be warm and he’s laid out his sleeping bag on top of the bed and now he’s zipping yours together with his to make one big sleeper. You smirk and snuggle in as he gets behind you. “My crybaby. Don’t you forget it. Forget about going back to Jackson. You stay here. With me. Got it? Don’t say dumb shit.” He’s growling as you fall asleep.

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

A Guiding Hand 3

No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as noncon/dubcon, age gap, parental neglect, depression, inference of self harm, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: your online academics are affected by your personal struggles but your professor won’t let you give up so easy.

Characters: Raymond Smith, Lee Bodecker in the background

Note: happy sunday.

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Please do not just put ‘more’. I will block you.

I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖

You stop in the openness of the library. Just ahead is the long counter that arcs in front of the windows that look into an office space lined with desks. There are monitors facing away from you, those meant for the librarians and their assistants, and along the far edge, a sign denotes the stations meant for self-checkout.  

You always thought of coming down but never found the energy. Besides, you wouldn’t want to borrow books that could be ruined at home. Beyond that, venturing into public has never been a simple task for you. You go for biweekly trips to spend the food credits on groceries and that’s about it. 

Your eyes skitter around frantically. You hear the babble of children in the kids’ section with its bright colourful chairs and couches and a table of toys for the tots. You quickly surpass it and wander into the stretch of tables and chairs by the reference section. You put your bag down on a chair and sit next to it, folding your hands on the table then pulling them back into your lap. 

You look over at the wall of tall windows that look out into a narrow strip of foliage. The brick walls are covered in thickly woven vines and birds flit in and out of the leaves. It’s pretty. You feel entirely out of place here. 

You check the time on your digital watch. Almost ten. You can at least tick the early box, even though you might fall short of everything else.  

You twiddle your fingers and keep your head down. Your toes tap in your sneakers and you fidget as the time ticks on. What if he doesn’t come? What if you’re not worth it? Should you check your email? 

As you reach your bag, a figure approaches the table from the other side. You retract your arm and peer up at the man as he sets a leather briefcase on the wooden surface. Professor Smith nods at you and greets you by name. You feel like you should stand to greet him. 

He offers his hand as you struggle to get to your feet. You tremble as you hesitantly accept the gesture. You don’t touch people and they certainly don’t touch you. It’s only a handshake. His grasp is firm and his skin slightly rough. Your hand feels weak and tiny in his confident grip. 

He let you go as your fingers tingle, “good morning.” 

“Morning, Professor, er, sir,” you stutter dumbly. 

“Please,” he pulls out the chair on his side and you lower yourself back to the seat. “How are you today?” 

“Mm, okay...” you swallow dryly, “er... you?” 

You almost cringe. It must be rude to forget that. You’re not so use to interaction and you’re certain it shows. 

You cross your arms over the table as his cheeks twitch and he smooths back his blond hair, “good, good,” he answers in his edged accent, “lovely sunshine today.” 

“Erm, yeah, uh...” you don’t know what to say or do. 

You close your eyes and reproach yourself. You must look totally lost. You drag your bag into your lap and unzip it. You take out your notebook and fish around for the chewed bic pen. You flip back the cover and flutter the pages, looking for a blank one. Your conscious of every single move you make as you feel his gaze on you. 

“Right, so, I suppose you’re eager to be done with it,” he begins, “was their particular activities you found challenging? Maybe a formula in particular--” 

“No, I... I think I got it but...” you twirl the pen and try to look at him. You get as far as the knot of his tie, the rest of it tucked beneath a sweater that seems rather much given the weather. “I just... fell behind. I’m s-sorry.” 

“Well, that’s fine. It happens. So, if you can do the work, I can wait on it,” he assures you. “I’m not here to reprimands, that hardly fruitful for either of us. I want us to come to an accord. Let agree on a course of action.” 

“Oh, alright,” you answer stuntedly, “well, I guess if I start Coursebook Four tonight I could have it done by—by Monday?” 

“That’s a good first step,” he encourages as he pushes his glasses up his nose, drawing your eyes up to his. They are icy blue but not cold. “I like it. Setting your own goals. I find for some, it’s more effective than tossing a bunch of dates at them.” 

“Thanks, professor, I... I really appreciate you... doing this,” you can’t help the shame that seeps into your voice. He pities you, you know it. You can see it in his face so you put your focus back to the table. 

“Mm, given your...situation I think it’s understandable,” he says, “not easy to work in a racket.” 

“Professor,” you put your hand to your forehead, dipping your head to hide behind it. 

“Very concerning to hear,” he says, “and to think of a young woman in that environment.” 

“Just my mom and her boyfriend. They don’t bother me.” 

“Seems they do with all that yelling.” 

“I-- I guess but—I—I need to use the bathroom,” you stand up and sway, “sorry.” 

"As you will," he allows lightly, "I'll be here." 

He sits back and checks his watch. It's much nicer than your plastic casio. You nod and sidle out from between the chair and the table. You shuffle away, only looking for a sign as you come out next to the front counter. You have to turn back to get to the bathrooms, your clueless meandering adding to the heat in your cheeks. 

You lock yourself in a stall and try to muster the strength to come back out. Why did you come here? You feel so much worse sitting across from that man. Look at him. How could he not judge you?  

You take and breath and try to shake away the anxiety. Someone else comes in and you make yourself leave. You wash your hands and steel yourself for another delve into the general public. You emerge and stop before the room of tables. 

Professor Smith sits patiently across from your things. You round the table and close your notebook, sliding the pen back in the spiral. You chew your lip and slide it into your bag. 

“I will have Assignment Four done like I said,” you speak barely above a whisper. 

“Sounds great,” he stands as well, “I must thank you for going to the trouble of meeting me here today. I do find virtual appointments hardly have the same... effect. Might I buy you a coffee for the inconvenience?” 

“A coffee? I... no, that’s--” 

“Or a tea?” He suggests. 

“Professor, um, no, that’s okay.” 

“I insist,” he says, “I saw a cafe on my way in. Just on the corner.” 

“I didn’t... bring my wallet.” 

“As I said, my treat,” he intones, “don’t worry, we won’t be talking business.” 

“Erm,” you sniff and slant your mouth one way then the other, “well, I...” you hate to keep saying no, it’s starting to feel rude. “Sure, er, okay, thanks.” 

“My pleasure,” he gestures you ahead of him, “ladies first.” 

You sling your bag on your shoulder and step past the table. You cross the library floor and tread by the curved counter. As you come to the doors, he quickly gets ahead of you and pushes the door open, holding it for you. He’s polite, almost to a stifling degree. 

The sunshine you casts a yellow haze, warming the dark fabric of your hoodie. You descend the steps and he catches up to you, keeping pace as he stays at your side. He points you to the left, “this way.” 

You obey and feel the brush of his sleeve against yours. Pedestrians across the street seem to stare at you. No doubt they can see how you don’t belong with that man. Him in his prim outfit; his sweater pulled over a tidy collared-shirt and tie, and his glasses denoting and air of professionality. But you, in your wrinkled hoodie and jeans, must make a paltry contrast to the man. 

“Right ahead,” he nudges the back of your arm gently before you can veer in the wrong direction, “would you like to sit outside? It’s beautiful out and I see a free table.” 

“Er, if you like,” you shrug and cross your arms, “you really don’t have to...” 

“I want to,” he assures as you come up to the patio area before the corner cafe, “please, you find a table and I’ll go inside. What would you like?” 

You stop just beside the short wooden fencing that block off the seating area. Tea is usually cheaper. You’d rather not stretch his pity past a few dollars. 

“Black tea.” 

“Milk?” He asks. 

“No, thanks.” 

“Sugar?” He arches a brow. 

“Just tea.” 

“Ah, got it,” he dips his chin, “I will return. Please, have a seat.” 

He turns on his heel and as he struts up to the front door, you search the patio. You find a table for two near the wall. You won’t be centre stage there. You put your bag under the chair and sit with your back to the street. 

What are you doing? You could leave now. You could just go home. You came to talk about your schoolwork. So why are you here getting tea with this man? You need to go home and get started on it. You hang your head and lean back in the chair, arms folded as you gnaw your chapped lip. 

The voices of the patrons around you buzz in the air. You catch snippets of conversations; excitement over a date they just had, or complaints about their work life, and even the low murmurs of intimate partners cooing at each other. Life is all around you, happening to other people but you remain in your corner. 

You wince as Professor Smith returns. He places a porcelain cup before you. One you can’t just run off with. He sits across from you as you look up. 

“Thank you, sir,” you utter as you sit up. 

“Not at all,” he blows over his mug, a dark coffee with a thin layer of foam around the sides. You can smell it. “I do get curious,” he sets the steaming cup own, “about my students. Teaching from a screen can be rather disconnecting. I meet all sorts in my work but you... I didn’t see your name in the introductory forum.” 

You look evasively at the brick wall. You untangle your arms and pinch the tag of the tea bag dangling over the brim. You shrug. 

“I must’ve forgot to post.” 

“Ah, never to worry, I won’t dock marks for it,” he kids, “so, you live with your mother.” 

You nod and your eyes drop to the table. 

“She must be proud.” 

You tear the tag from the string and it recoils and falls into the tea. 

“Proud?” 

“Yes, well, you’re going to school. It’s not nothing.” 

“Yeah, but...” it goes without saying; you’re not doing very well. 

“Like I said, you’ve shown you can do the work, so do it,” he intones. 

“I know.” 

“What made you choose this program?” 

“I don’t... know.” 

“Well, you seem to have a natural affinity for numbers. Did anyone ever mention it?” 

“I guess,” you lift the cup by the handle and blow over the top. You cautiously taste it and burn yourself nonetheless. You put it back down and cover your singed lip, the tip of your tongue pulsing. 

“You alright?” He asks. 

You nod furiously. 

“Mm, well, I must admit, I am rather bad at subterfuge. This is a bad ploy,” he sits back, one hand on the table as he taps his index against his thumb, “I’d rather you take your time with the tea and not only for the sake of your tongue. I... hoped to keep you busy so that you needn’t return home so quickly. To that.” 

“That?” 

“What I overheard,” he says. 

“Oh, I told you--” 

“It may be usual for you but it doesn’t make it any safer,” he interjects. “I don’t know if you saw the email but I sent some resource you might look into. Grants. Some for housing. You could extricate yourself. You should.” 

You’re breathless. It’s humiliating. How pathetic you must be in his eyes. 

“I didn’t come to embarrass you,” he leans forward and slides his hand across the table. 

You turn your head and gulp, the lump in your throat suffocating. Your nose tingles as your face scalds. You shudder and push your shoulders up. 

“You’re a bright young woman, I only thought I might...” he struggles to find words, “well, I did not begin as a professor. I did not even start as some high and above pupil. No, I was a miserable lad. Barely made it through my first year but... all I’m saying is I might not have been where you are, but I get it.” 

Your lashes flutter as you fight back tears. You’re so tired of crying. You’re exhausted of feeling this way. No matter what you do or where you are, you just feel like you don’t belong. 

You look at your watch, “I’ll have to go soon.” You won’t even come up with a lie. You need to go before you break down completely. 

He sighs, “right.” 

[pedrointofolklore]

Rosebud

pairing: joel miller x f!reader

summary: carnations bloomed when you saw joel. too shy to admit your feelings, but too overcome to not, you began leaving flowers at his doorstep. 

warnings: very brief but graphic depictions of violence, mentions of death/grief, tragic backstory, emotional processing, reader is a loser who falls in love in two seconds, lots of metaphorical language, swearing, mostly just self-indulgent fluff, joel is soft, big age gap (reader is in late 20s), no smut, no use of y/n (reader has a nickname), jackson era.

word count: 6k

a/n: hey y’all. i’m delving into the world of fanfiction writing and i’m tentatively posting this as my first story. this story by @army-author is what inspired me here—i read it years ago and loved the concept ever since. i also super don't know much about flower gardening so apologies for any inaccuracies.

Your earliest memory was sitting in the garden with your mother one September. You were small then, no more than three years old, covered in soil and some residual stickiness from whatever fruit you’d just devoured, watching with a curious eye as your mother pruned her roses.

When you thought of her, you thought of that garden. In your memories, it was a labyrinth. Flowers, shrubs and vines overflowed the yard. You used to fear getting lost in the brambles, but at some point, you started to crave their thorny embrace.

It was a pink rose, so bright and intense, like a painting come to life. She shed the thorns, tucked it behind your ear and pinched your chubby cheeks. That was the first time she called you ‘Rosebud.’ Nobody ever called you anything else.

You couldn’t have known then that you were just a few Septembers away from losing her.

She died on the first day, in the centre of the garden. Your lasting memory of her was your father driving a pair of garden shears into her jugular. She collapsed to the ground, blood as dark as a crimson rose pooled around her as your father wept over her lifeless body. You sprinted inside and threw up.

She died a stranger. You didn’t understand what was happening to her then, but you understood that she was gone before the shears even entered her neck.

It haunted you for the next twenty years—but that person was not your mother. 

Whenever the wound opened, and that memory came flooding back, you closed your eyes and thought of her as she truly was—kind, gentle, passionate. You recalled her soft smile, her musical laugh, the books she read, the flowers she loved.

When you were a kid, you thought of her as the sun that kept those flowers alive. As you grew older, she became the sutures that kept you from falling apart.

You knew your father had no other choice, but you could never quite look at him the same. Still, he was all you had, and he kept you safe until the day he died.

It was your mother’s leather-bound notebook that kept you going. She listed every flower she could think of, and wrote the meaning next to it. That notebook went with you everywhere, all across the country. Every new species you came across, you found it in the book, memorised its meaning, and crossed it off your mental checklist.

Flower seeking had to be the most frivolous thing one could do at the end of the world, but it kept you close to your mother, and gave you some semblance of purpose. Each new flower felt like something blooming inside you—your own secret garden that grew from the depths of your soul.

Carnations bloomed when you saw Joel.

He first came to Jackson in December with a girl by his side. They were gone by the next morning, but you saw him. He was coming out of the bar, tugging his coat back on when you spotted him through the crowd of carolling townspeople.

Even from a distance, you noticed the pain in him—a pain similar to yours. There was a wistfulness in his face, a longing for something he missed, and a fear so intense it seemed paralysing. He clutched at his chest, holding in the marigold that grew where his heart should have been.

You wanted to know him.

He came back that spring with the same girl, and this time, he stayed.

It was a while before you spoke with either of them. Everyone who arrived in Jackson had a tendency to be closed-off at first, and you couldn’t fault them for that. You didn’t know where they’d been or what they’d done, but you knew they’d gone through hell.

You met Ellie first. She came by the greenhouse one day, arms crossed and face vacant. Her reticence might have been mistaken for hostility if you didn’t relate so much.

You tore your soil-covered gloves off and wiped a hand over your cheek, probably just further smudging whatever dirt was caked on there.

“Hi there!” You did your best to sound cheerful, to come across as someone who was definitely okay with unexpected visitors. “What can I do for you?”

“Maria told me you might need some help around here.”

You didn’t think you needed help, and it seemed like the girl wanted to be anywhere but here. But as you pondered her, you started to recognise what she was actually getting at.

She didn’t know what to do, but she needed to do something.

“What’s your name?” you asked.

“Ellie.”

“Nice to meet you, Ellie.” You held out your hand, which she stared at for a good couple of seconds before shaking. “Call me Rosebud.”

“You’re a florist named Rosebud?” She was incredulous, and you didn’t even care that she was making fun of you—it was the first time you’d seen her smile during this entire interaction.

“It’s a nickname,” you told her, “and I'm more of a floriculturist. If you want to help me out, grab some gloves and a trowel.”

“What the fuck is a ‘trowel’?”

You spent the next few hours with her digging holes in the soil, un-potting flowers and planting them in the ground. As apprehensive as Ellie had been to begin with, it didn’t take her long to warm up to you.

The first thing you learned about her was that she asked a lot of questions.

“Why do we have to move these?”

“It’s spring. They’ll do better in the ground.”

“Why didn’t Maria show us this place when we first came here?”

“It was winter. Half the flowers had gone to shit, so there wasn’t much to see,” you replied, flattening the soil around a sunflower plant.

The greenhouse had been established before you got there. Nobody ran it, it was something for everyone to tend to, but nobody cared enough to do so. The gardeners of Jackson preferred to focus on crops that could actually feed them. But then you arrived, and you knew how to grow a thriving flower garden, and with all the bees it brought, it only helped the agriculture. It also meant that Jackson had honey.

“This one’s cool. What is it?” Ellie asked. You looked over at the plant she was settling into the ground—a grassy little shrub with white flowers blooming at the ends.

“Starwort. It means ‘Welcome to a stranger.’”

“Appropriate,” Ellie said. “I didn’t know flowers had meanings.”

“It’s called floriography,” you replied. “I have a book all about it.”

Ellie stayed until the sun began to set, leaving in much better spirits than she arrived. You were used to working alone, and you thought you preferred it that way, but she turned out to be good company. You sent her home with a starwort blossom and a jar of honey as a thank you, and told her to come back any time. You really hoped she would.

You met Joel the next morning. 

There was a knock at your door, which you expected to be Ellie back again. Instead, you opened the door to find her guardian standing on your front porch.

Your eyes flicked shamelessly over his form. He was broad, strong, with plaid sleeves hiked up to his elbows—you didn’t know it was possible to be attracted to someone’s forearms. His features were beautifully angular, especially his nose. But it was his eyes that really got you. They were dark like coffee, deep and intense. You could fall into them and never stop.

The garden you carried in your soul had never felt more alive. It was weird you hadn’t spoken yet, but you worried if you opened your mouth, the brightest, reddest chrysanthemums would come bursting out.

“Good mornin’. Sorry to bother you,” Joel finally said, with the rehearsed politeness typical of a Southern man. There was still an earnestness to him, like he didn’t quite remember how to do this but he was determined to try. “I think Ellie was here yesterday?”

“That’s right.” You internally cheered when your voice didn’t fail on you. “Is that okay? I know I didn’t get your permission. She just kind of showed up.”

“No, that’s okay. I just came by to thank you.”

“Thank me?”

“She's been struggling to…adjust, I guess,” Joel explained, “but she was in a good mood when she came home yesterday. I think being here helped her, so thank you.”

You weren’t quite sure what to say. People silently appreciated what you did for the commune, but nobody had ever gone out of their way to thank you for anything. It was a little overwhelming.

“Well, she’s welcome here any time.” You didn’t think Ellie was particularly interested in gardening, but you could see that the girl just needed to feel busy, and maybe needed some company. You were just glad she could find that with you.

“Thank you,” Joel said again. “What was your name, darlin’?”

“Just call me Rosebud.”

You expected a laugh, a mocking jab of some sort, but instead he just tilted his head and looked at you with complete sincerity. “Pretty. It suits you.”

Your cheeks were embarrassingly warm.

“Well, I won’t keep you any longer,” Joel said. Your heart fell. “It was nice meetin’ you. And, uh, thanks again.”

He started to leave, but you weren’t ready for him to go. Before you could think it through, you called after him, “Wait.”

You might have imagined it, but for a split second after he turned back around, you could've sworn you spotted an eagerness in him, like he was hoping you’d say that.

“You can come inside,” you offered, “if you want.”

He did.

Five minutes later, Joel was standing in your kitchen, leaning against the counter. You could feel his gaze on you as you moved, getting the water ready and setting out two mugs.

“How do you like your coffee?” You were already sure of the answer.

“Black. No sugar.” Yep.

You poured the coffee into a mug, absent-mindedly blowing on it as you handed it to him. He didn’t wait for it to cool down before taking a sip, not even flinching at the heat.

You opted for tea with a generous amount of milk and honey.

“Thanks for the honey as well,” Joel said. “Ellie loves it. She’s never had anything so sweet.”

“That doesn’t surprise me if she grew up in a QZ,” you replied, turning to face him with your mug cradled in both hands. “I think I cried when I first got here and they actually had sugar.”

“When did you get here?”

“Around two years ago. My dad knew Seth—you know, from the bar—got in touch with him, and he told us how to get here,” you explained. You truly hated Seth, but he did save your ass and that left you obligated to be nice.

“Your dad’s not here, is he?” Joel spoke without any particular sentiment. It was an observation, plain and simple. You didn’t mind, you just shook your head. It felt normal to talk about your dad. You missed him, but his death wasn’t horrifically tragic to you—the man had a heart attack.

“What about you? I mean, how’d you end up here?” You were nervous about prying, or accidentally chasing him away before you really got to talk, but Joel had fascinated you since December. You needed to know more.

“I was in the Boston QZ for a while, left to look for my brother, found him.” He wasn’t going to get more detailed than that. Too much had happened that was difficult to talk about, and you could see that, because it was the same for you.

No matter how much you wanted to, you didn’t let yourself ask anything more. You didn’t ask why he’d been here in winter, why he left so soon, why he came back, why he didn’t come sooner if his brother was here, how Ellie fit into all of it. You didn’t ask, and you wouldn’t ask. All you could do was hope he’d open up in time.

It occurred to you just how different Joel looked now than he did in December, and not just because you were actually seeing him up-close. His whole spirit had shifted. Back then, he’d been like an open wound, barely being held together by exposed, bloody tendons that threatened to snap at any moment. He was different now—still wounded, but no longer in pieces.

There was something else in him too. Something dormant, but always on the verge of springing back to life. A quiet guilt.

“Flowers always been your thing?” Joel asked. You were grateful for the subject change.

“Pretty much. I used to know someone who loved them. Made me love them too.”

He nodded with an unexpected softness in his expression. It wasn’t pity, or even sympathy, but a warm kind of understanding.

“I know the flower stuff seems silly,” you said, looking down into the milky beige of your tea, “but it really is useful.”

“I know that,” Joel said. “I don’t think it’s silly.”

You could practically feel your chest split open that very second. Flowers sprouted from your heart, and they bloomed for Joel. They longed to reach out, wrap him up in their stems and vines and pull him into you.

Carnations. Chrysanthemums. Vervain.

You kept your composure until Joel left. You said your farewells, waved him off, shut the door, and immediately collapsed on your couch in a lovestruck heap. It was all so dramatic, the sofa may as well have been a bed of roses.

It wasn’t just that Joel was attractive—and fuck, he was attractive—it was the way he wholly and truly respected you. Respect was something you’d had to earn from everyone else around here, but Joel didn’t need any convincing. He saw your worth right away.

He was all you thought about for the rest of the day, the evening, until you went to bed that night. Even then, your mind wouldn’t stop racing.

These feelings were big, too big. Keeping them inside hurt, but you feared letting them out would be agony. They were safest with you, blossoming into flowers in your soul, where only you knew about them.

But still, you were wide awake, consumed by the urge to do something, say something.

So you got up, pulled your shoes on, went outside and picked a flower from your garden.

Jackson was desolate as you wandered down the street. The only residents awake at this hour were those on patrol. It might have been eerie if you weren’t so wound up. 

You scanned each house as you passed by, looking for Joel’s. Your heart pounded in your chest when you found it. You didn’t need to be so nervous, the lights were off, but you kept imagining someone walking out and catching you in the act. But you’d come this far, and his front door was just a few yards away.

You climbed the stone steps with a quiet urgency, twirling the flower between your fingers one last time before dropping it just outside his door.

A single gardenia.

You were going to leave it at just one flower—you didn’t want to be weird and scare Joel off before you really got to know him. But then Ellie came by the greenhouse again.

“Did you leave a flower on our front porch the other day?” she asked, watering a yarrow seedling.

“What? Why?” You felt so lame, and so stupid for forgetting that Ellie lived there too. Your gesture was bound to get intercepted.

“There was a white flower out there. I showed it to Joel, and we figured it was from you.” It was a very reasonable thing to figure considering it was from you.

“What did Joel say?” you asked, trying not to sound as desperate as you felt.

“He said it was for him.”

“So he took it?”

“Yeah,” Ellie said. “Don’t know what he did with it.”

Ellie wasn’t nearly as invested in this as you were, but it still sounded promising. Joel had accepted the flower, maybe even liked it. The thought made your stomach feel strange, like a bunch of petals were flurrying around in there.

“Well, it was for him…” you mumbled.

Ellie glared at you in feigned outrage. “I’m insulted.”

“What are you complaining about?” you laughed. “I gave you a flower.”

“It’s wilting.”

“Fine then”—you handed her a pair of pruning shears—“go cut yourself a new flower.”

She wandered around the greenhouse for about five minutes and came back spinning a flower between her thumb and index finger. It had pure white petals and a bright yellow pistil. “I chose this daisy.”

“That’s a cosmos,” you corrected. “It represents harmony and balance.”

Ellie assessed the flower in her hand, genuinely mulling over the meaning of it, and you realised how much you appreciated her. She saw value in something you cared about. 

“What did Joel’s mean?” she asked.

“I’m actually not sure about that one.” It was a total lie, but you sounded convincing enough that Ellie shrugged it off and carried on watering flowers.

You couldn’t help yourself after that. Knowing that Joel accepted your gift made you want to do it again. And again.

So you did. Every few days, when you were sure he and Ellie were asleep, you sauntered down to their house and dropped a flower outside the door. An aster, agapanthus, camellia…

Joel never mentioned it, and you never really expected him to, but the nods and soft smiles he gave you when he saw you around were enough to let you know he appreciated you.

But Joel would never know the true meaning of your flowers. It was better that way.

Maria and Tommy’s son was born later in the spring, and your garden had never seen so many visitors. The new parents were practically drowning in congratulatory flower arrangements, and eventually Tommy had to tell you to start turning people away.

One of these visitors happened to be Joel, and he was the one person you couldn’t turn away.

Unlike everyone else, Joel came to your door first. The slight nerves he’d had the first time he came over were gone, but so was the facade of sociability. Maybe this uncouth version of Joel should have irked you, but seeing him comfortable enough to drop the pretence just made you like him more.

“I need help with something,” he said, not even bothering with a hello.

“What is it?”

“A gift for the happy family,” he spoke bitterly, like he was actively trying not to grimace as the words came out.

“Flowers?”

“Flowers seem appropriate.”

Joel was strangely upset for someone who was welcoming their nephew into the world. You didn’t know the story between Tommy and Joel, just that they hadn’t seen each other for years before Joel and Ellie arrived in Jackson, and that Maria really disliked him.

But despite his sour attitude, it was clear Joel was trying. Whatever was weighing on him, he was pushing it down and choosing to be thoughtful for the sake of his family. Tommy could deal with one more bouquet.

You walked down to the greenhouse with Joel trailing behind you, his hands shoved into his pockets the entire time. On a better day, you would have tried to make conversation with him, but he obviously didn’t need that pressure right now.

He finally spoke up when you arrived at the greenhouse. “This place has seen better days.”

It wasn’t the flowers he was talking about, it was the structure itself. The contractor in him must have noticed the rusted metal pipes holding everything together, the holes and tears in the plastic sheets, and the fact that there was almost no room to walk.

“I know it’s bad,” you said with a nervous laugh. “It was built before I got here. I don’t think they used their finest materials.”

It was always cramped in here, but Joel being so broad and having such a presence made it even worse. He was closer to you now than he’d ever been. He smelled warm, like fresh coffee and leather and musk. It made your head spin.

“So, what kind of flowers are you thinking?” You needed to change the subject before you threw yourself at this man.

“Uh...pink?”

You laughed—you couldn’t help it. He couldn’t have been more vague if he tried.

“Why’s that funny?” He wasn’t mad, but he did seem impatient.

“Sorry,” you said, fighting back a smile. “Maybe you could elaborate on that?”

“I don’t know,” he groaned, running a hand over his prickly beard. “This is why I need help.”

You felt bad for laughing when he was so stressed out. He was overthinking something that should have been simple, and it made your heart ache for him. He was looking for guidance.

“We’ll do peonies for good fortune,” you told him, “and daffodils for new beginnings.”

His shoulders relaxed as some of the tension left him. Whatever was weighing on him was still there, but this was one thing that made it bearable. 

You walked back to your house after cutting the flowers, where there was actually space to work. You expected Joel to leave then, go home and wait until the flowers were ready like everyone else did, maybe even have you deliver them on his behalf, but he stayed by your side.

“How do you know all this stuff?” Joel asked, sitting across the table from you as you worked. “About flowers, I mean.”

You never got into this with anyone, but your inexplicable attachment to Joel compelled you to open up. Whatever pain resided in him reminded you of your own. He understood you.

“My mom had this book. She wrote down the meaning of every flower she knew of, and I guess I’ve memorised it all over the years,” you explained.

Talking about her didn’t hurt like you thought it would. It was actually a relief.

“When did it happen?” You knew what he was asking.

“First day,” you replied.

He nodded solemnly. “Me too.”

This wasn’t the first time you had seen through the gaps in Joel’s armour, but it was the first time he’d made the choice to let you. You didn’t know his limits, if those two words were as deep as he could get, but you wanted to see what would happen if you just asked.

“Joel?”

“Hm?”

“You don’t seem happy about this,” you said, straightforward but still cautious.

“I guess I’m not,” he admitted, looking down pensively.

“Why is that?”

“Just don’t understand bringing a kid into all this.”

You agreed with him. The people of Jackson were as safe as they could be, but outside the walls were infected, raiders, FEDRA, and a multitude of horrors too awful to speak of. It would only take one mistake for Jackson to be completely wiped out. You wouldn’t want to bring a child into a world like that either.

But you also knew that most people who had kids post-outbreak hadn’t done it by choice.

“It’s not as if people have access to birth control,” you pointed out, stacking peonies onto a piece of tissue paper. “But I don’t disagree.”

“It’s just a lot for me to wrap my head around,” Joel continued—or maybe he was starting on a completely different train of thought. “Tommy’s the uncle. He’s always been the uncle. I’m…“

He couldn’t say it. He didn’t have to.

“You still are,” you told him. “Tommy’s still an uncle.”

Joel was silent, letting your words sink in. It was cold comfort, and maybe you shouldn’t have said it, but it was what you believed.

“Why do people call you Rosebud?” The question took you aback. It was completely unrelated, yet felt so important. He was the first person in twenty years to ask you that question.

“My mom came up with it when I was little. It’s what everyone’s called me since.”

“Doesn’t it hurt?” Joel asked. “Seems like a constant reminder of what you lost.”

It was hard having to live without her, but you never wanted to forget what you lost. “I guess I like the reminders.”

His hand absent-mindedly fell to the broken watch on his wrist, and for a fleeting moment, you were seeing the man you first saw in December. An open wound. Marigold.

“She didn’t stop being my mom,” you said quietly. “I didn’t stop being her daughter.”

And as quickly as the wound opened, it was once again sewn shut. He even managed a smile. “You’re wise, kid. You know that?”

Kid.

Ouch.

It felt like a kick to the stomach. In an instant, the carnations that bloomed when you first saw Joel all those months ago, that had been so red and vibrant, faded into yellow.

You held yourself together until he left. You finished arranging the flowers, wrapped them up, handed them over to him, said goodbye and wished him luck, then trudged over to the couch and flopped down onto it—this time in a dejected heap.

It wasn’t as if you thought you had much of a chance with Joel, but this just felt so awfully final. It didn’t matter that you were basically thirty years old—in his mind, you were a kid.

It was embarrassing. You thought about the flowers you left—a quiet admission of feelings—and prayed the couch would swallow you whole and suffocate you. 

You’d gotten it all wrong. Joel never appreciated it. He probably thought it was weird and pathetic but didn’t have the heart to tell you. You wondered why he even accepted the initial flower, and if you weren’t feeling so spurned and humiliated, it might have dawned on you that you were overreacting.

You still left a flower that night, if only to get some closure. It would be the last one you ever left him.

A red tulip.

Joel came to your door one day in July.

You’d come to expect Ellie on your front porch at least once a week, but Joel wasn’t a surprise either. You were friends now, even after such an embarrassing rejection.

Joel still never mentioned the flowers. He was probably relieved when you stopped leaving them and wanted to pretend it never happened, and that was fine by you.

Being friends didn’t help matters though. He was always rough and grumpy in his Joel way, but he was sweet too. So sweet. It felt impossible to move on.

“Hey, Joel,” you said. “Need help with something?”

“I wanted to help you, actually.”

“Me?”

“I can’t keep lookin’ at that greenhouse,” Joel said. “It’s a piece of shit.”

You had to laugh at his honesty. “You want to patch it up?”

“Was thinking of taking the whole thing apart and rebuildin’ it.”

The offer stunned you. It was so generous and so out of nowhere. Your first instinct was to say no, that it wasn’t worth the trouble, but something stopped you. It was Joel coming to you in earnest and saying he wanted to help. It felt like an insult to deny him.

You smiled warmly and nodded. “Okay.”

“When can I get started?” he asked.

Shit. You had dozens of flower pots you didn’t know what to do with. “Uh, I’ll have to empty the greenhouse first. I guess I'll bring the flowers here in the meantime.”

“Ellie and I can help with that,” Joel said. “I’ll go get her.”

You blinked at him. “Now?”

“You got other plans?”

You absolutely did not. “Ah, no. Now is good.”

“Great.”

That was how you spent your day, lugging flower pots from the greenhouse and unloading them in your front yard with Joel and Ellie in tow. It was so lovely it bordered on being painful—pink roses unshed of their thorns pierced your heart.

You let yourself imagine for a moment that this was reality. That you, Joel and Ellie were a weird, happy family. The carnations in your soul had never been more yellow, and you instantly regretted indulging in that particular fantasy.

Joel was already at the greenhouse when you went there the next morning. He was up on a ladder, and half of the structure was already torn down. Rusted metal pipes and discoloured, ripped up plastic sheets were piling up a few feet away.

“Need any help?” you called out.

He looked down at you and smiled—a real, wide smile you hadn’t seen on him before. “You know what you’re doin'?”

“Not really.”

“Then, no,” he replied. “Don’t want you droppin’ anything on that pretty little head.”

Huh?

You flushed all over, wishing your couch was here so you could collapse onto it. Less than two months ago he was calling you a kid, and now he thought your head was pretty. The thought crept in that maybe he was purposely messing with you, but you liked Joel too much to entertain the idea.

“Well, I probably can’t help with the physical labour,” you said, cursing how nervous your voice sounded. “But if there’s anything else…”

“You’re a sweet one, Rosebud,” Joel said. He had to be doing this on purpose. “You just let me do my thing, and we’ll leave it a surprise.”

You laughed. “In other words, you’re telling me to get lost?”

He grinned at you fondly. “Just trust me.”

It only took one exchange for that hope to come back to life. You tried to stop it, tell yourself he was just teasing, that he didn’t mean it that way, but it was too late. Those carnations were already morphing back into a searing red.

You wanted to come by everyday and watch him work, but you stayed away and waited for him to come to you. It only took a few days for him to show up at your door, looking infuriatingly hot covered in blotches of sage green paint.

“Is it ready?” you asked.

“It’s ready.”

You followed along behind him, keeping your eyes down so you didn’t accidentally spot the new greenhouse before he was ready for you to look. You ended up just ogling his ass, which was a decidedly better and much more pinch-able sight than the ground.

“Look now.”

You lifted your gaze, and your hands flew up to your mouth as you let out a dramatic gasp.

It wasn’t just good, it wasn’t just an improvement, it was beautiful—masterfully pieced together with timber and painted the same sage green that Joel was sporting on his clothes. And it was bigger. There would actually be space for you to walk around inside.

Joel started to panic from beside you, and you realised you were crying. “Is it the green? I can repaint it if you hate it.”

You seemed to have lost the power of speech to reassure him, so instead, you threw your arms around him and held tight. The suddenness of it shocked him, and his hands found your waist. You weren’t sure if he was about to push you away or pull you in.

“So, you like it?” he asked.

“I love it,” you snivelled into his shoulder. “Thank you, Joel.”

He hugged you back then, caging you in with his big arms and making you feel so safe. You felt a prickly sensation on your temple as he brushed his lips against it. 

Red tulips were threatening to burst out of you in droves. You didn’t want to let go, but you were seconds away from making a confession you couldn’t take back if you spent too much longer in his embrace.

You pulled yourself away, and even with the sun beating down on you, you missed his warmth.

He walked you back home, came inside when you offered him iced tea (you were out of coffee), drank it all even if it was too sweet for him, and all you could do was thank him repeatedly for what he’d done.

“Don’t have to thank me,” he said. “I wanted to do this for you.”

What did that mean?

“I’m sorry I never said anything,” Joel continued, a pink flush apparent on his cheeks.

“About what?” You knew exactly what.

“The flowers. I wanted to thank you, but I didn’t know how. I’m not used to it.”

“Used to what?”

“Kindness.” He almost winced, like it hurt to say.

“It was weird. I’m sorry.”

“It wasn’t weird,” Joel assured you. “It was…nice. Bummed me out when you stopped.”

“Sorry.”

“Don’t apologise. I get it.”

You didn’t know what to say at this point. You didn’t want to be talking about any of it, and you were about to tell him that, ask him to move on from this, until he decided to put you on the absolute spot.

“What did they mean?”

Fuck. “Hm?”

“The flowers,” he said. “You said flowers have meaning. What did they mean?”

“I actually don’t know those ones.” That harmless little lie worked on Ellie, but Joel saw right through it.

“Why are you lying to me?” He didn’t even sound angry or annoyed, just genuinely curious, and a little sympathetic.

You considered doubling-down, insisting you didn't know, but you couldn’t do that him. It was a vulnerable conversation for not only you, but Joel as well. You understood how hard this was for him, and you cared for him too much to shut him down.

But you couldn’t say it, not verbally. Instead, you grabbed the notebook that was laying on your coffee table and held it out to him. There was a split second as he was reaching for it where you imagined yourself tugging it back out of his reach, forgetting about this entire thing, but then it was in his hands and it was too late. Nothing would ever be the same.

You held your breath as he flipped through it, his eyes flicking over the words. His face gave nothing away, but his finger was tracing over something.

Red tulip - declaration of love. 

He gently shut the book and set it down, and your eyes stayed firmly on the floor, hoping if you stared at it long enough it would split open and consume you.

“Are you surprised?” You couldn’t project your voice above a whisper.

“I guess not,” Joel said. It was the honest answer, and the one you most expected. “I thought you were just bein’ nice, then Ellie kept insisting you were interested.”

That girl was smarter than you gave her credit for—and you already thought she was very smart.

“I thought there was no way,” Joel continued. “You’re sweet and young and so pretty. I’m just an old man.”

“I don’t care how old you are,” you replied.

“I’ve done a lot of bad things...”

“I don’t care what you’ve done. I care who you are now.”

You were looking at him now. He looked moved, rapt, and not at all like someone about to deliver a devastating rejection.

“And you want me?”

“Yes.”

There was a pause where neither of you said anything, but the air was thick with an unspoken question: Where do we go from here?

“Can I kiss you, Rosebud?”

You nodded, and he did. It felt like dozens of chrysanthemums, camellias and carnations all springing to life under your skin.

He was gentle in a way you never could have imagined, cupping your cheek with his palm and holding your waist with the other. It was reminiscent of the hug you’d shared earlier, and you wondered if he’d wanted to kiss you then.

His lips were rough, a little chapped, but soft in the way he moved them. This wouldn’t be how he always kissed, you were sure of that. Someday it would be messy, frantic, all-consuming. But this careful, slow movement of his lips against yours was all you needed right now. 

He wanted to be gentle with you, because he cherished you like a rosebud.

flower translations:

rose (pink) - perfect happiness

rose (dark crimson) - mourning

carnation (red) - admiration

marigold - grief, despair

starwort - welcome to a stranger

chrysanthemum (red) - i love you

vervain - enchantment

gardenia - you’re lovely

yarrow - healing

aster - symbol of love

agapanthus - secret love

camellia (pink) - longing for you

peony - prosperity

daffodil (bunch) - new beginnings, hope, good luck

carnation (yellow) - rejection, disappointment

tulip (red) - declaration of love

rosebud (red) - pure, lovely

[rocksibblingsau]

Love love love ur ideas!!!!

Do you have any more headcanons for Mount Rageon Branch or Adopted by Bergens Branch?

In Mount Rageon Branch, Velvet and Veneer are still a lil self absorbed and looking for the easy way out of things. They don't wanna do any hard work, meanwhile Branch is all about hard work and doing things for yourself.

Branch sees them fighting over wanting fame and it reminds him of his brothers, so he makes it his goal to help them realize their dreams AND remain close. Since they'd be training from childhood, they'd have a better shot at learning how to sing thanks to Branch.

I can't decide if they actually do end up good singers but if they do, Branch is their manager and there would be a moment where post BroZone reunion they see Branch managing and have JD flashbacks. Branch doesn't get bad like John did about controlling their image, but the sight of Branch taking charge and giving orders for show prep really reminds them of a less than happy time of their lives.

Branch: Alright guys, we're gonna open with 'Fame' and close with 'Watch Me Work'. No, wait. Open with 'Sweet Dreams' and close with 'Fame'. Now go out there and make Mount Rageous history! Bruce: Clay I hope you're also an EMT because I think I'm having a heart attack. Clay: I'm with you bro, this is disturbing to watch.

If they don't go the singing route, Branch helps them discover SOME sort of skill they can make it big with.

They don't call him 'Branch'. Velvet decided his name had to match theirs so they call him 'Vine'. They think it's a funny name since he's always on them 'like a vine'. Branch doesn't really care what they call him as long as they stop rubbing his hair trying to suck out his "singing magic".

When Velvet and Veneer found out about Bergens, her solution was "Just stay with us at all times. I'll hold onto you like the last designer handbag at a flash sale."

If they did encounter a Bergen, Velvet would hit them in the head with her purse that weighs 10 tons.

In Bergen Branch AU, Gristle is ironically the excitable kid while Branch can barely muster any enthusiasm for anything. Some people joke that it's like Gristle's a troll at heart and Branch a Bergen. Gristle doesn't go as apathetic and listless as he does in canon since I believe the catalyst was Gristle Sr telling him nothing would ever make him happy. Since in this AU he was given Branch, he was told that Branch would make him happy, so he still has hope.

When they're older, Branch is a sort of sarcastic adviser to Gristle. Everyone's kind of figured out that even if you can get one over on Gristle, the troll on his shoulder won't be fooled and he does NOT show mercy. Gristle also takes his opinion in pretty high regard about pretty much anything.

Branch also gets pretty comfortable with his concept of mortality and he makes jokes about being eaten by Bergens constantly.

Gristle: I got another letter asking if they can buy and eat you. Branch: At this rate I'd be tempted to tell you accept all of them and watch their faces fall when they realize fifty other Bergens also get a piece. Gristle: Branch. Branch: A peanut sized serving of grey troll. Gristle: Branch. Branch: That'd probably be the one thing that could make a Bergen more miserable than you already are, if that's possible. Gristle: Branch. I'm not selling you to get eaten by fifty different Bergens. Branch: You'd be doing me a mercy and ending my suffering.

Gristle: Branch I need you to help me with the audit. Branch: *lays on his palm* Eat me. Gristle: Later. For now you have to help me. Branch: F***. Branch: Is this how you derive joy? Making trolls do your paperwork? You're the only Bergen in the world who would make me do taxes instead of eating me. Gristle: You complain too much and it ruins my appetite. Branch: Has any troll ever not complained? Do you think on Trollstice we were all jumping for joy? 'Yippie! Death!' Gristle: I dunno, try it next time and we'll see if it works.

This trait scares and unnerves other trolls. Poppy asks him to stop once they befriend Bergens because she's worried they'll take offense and "They're our friends now, not troll-eating monsters. That's in the past."

"I'd like it to be in the present so I don't have to listen to another musical number."

[leopardusk]

Making headcanons for all of the brush gods because I like them and wish they got screentime. Some Japanese mythology has been applied here, but most of it is working within the lore of the actual game and just me having fun with animals.

Yomigami (dragon, rejuvination)

While we find all of the brush gods through constellations, they mention hiding in different places. I believe Yomigami was the only one who actually became a constellation to hide after Amaterasu’s first death.

The rest of the brush gods were once animals who later ascended to godhood, but Yomigami actually came from the celestial plane. He’s related to Orochi, perhaps brothers, but rejuvination and destruction soon came into conflict and Yomigami sided with the celestials. He was afraid to fall to the earth after Orochi did and stayed in the sky, choosing to maintain the underworld instead.

Tachigami (rat, power slash)

You’d think that the tiger or boar would be the bravest and most fierce of the brush gods, but that title goes to the rat. He is unbeatable with his sword, and most of the gods have learned that accepting his challenges are a fool’s errand. Most great swordsmen have a shrine dedicated to the rat, though someone not aware might find this ridiculous. A rat, really? Such a small creature? They soon learn that even the smallest warrior should not be taken lightly, and even your most treasured friend is not to be trusted. Kabegami would tell you that.

Hanagami triumvirate. These are the greensprout monkeys, and brothers, Sakigami (bloom), Hasugami (water lily), Tsutagami (vine).

They act as sort of Sakuya’s advisors, helping maintain the plant life around Kamiki village and also heading out to further lands where she cannot go. They also play music, and teach the konohana shuffle and all its variants to anyone in Nippon.

Sakigami is the calmest of the three, enjoying luxury and serenity. He takes his duties as a god the most seriously, and will frequently visit farmers and guardian saplings to make sure everything is in order. His brothers call him lazy and uptight, but he thinks of it as smart and collected. Two traits those monkeys could use more of.

Hasugami is immensely curious, and actually the closest to Sakuya out of the three. He loves hopping from place to place, although never straying too far from home. His clumsiness gets on Sakigami’s nerves, but Tsutagami finds it endlessly entertaining, which Hasugami finds weirdly comforting.

Tsutagami is constantly brimming with ideas, very few of them subtle. He loves making up games that are probably extremely stupid and dangerous, but hey, they’re gods now, might as well make the most of it! Hasugami is his partner in crime, and they’re both constantly working to get Sakigami to lighten up and join them in their ridiculousness.

Bakugami (boar, cherry bomb)

When you first meet Bakugami he seems intimidating and angry, constantly seconds away from exploding and catching anyone in his wrath. But spend any time with him and you’ll learn the truth: he’s just a goofy dad, and he’ll adopt you too if you aren’t careful. He loves his kids to pieces and cares a lot for their safety, but his idea of safe is “blow yourself up and I’ll keep watch.” The Hanagami triumvirate is at their wits end trying to keep him away from destructible things, like houses and sacred trees and people. The triumvirate, however, usually means just Sakigami, as the other two are much more likely to get swept up in his heedless adventures.

Yumigami (rabbit, crescent)

Okay hear me out on this one. Yumigami is Amaterasu’s ex-wife. HEAR ME OUT.

They were together before the destruction of the celestial plane, and Yumigami was actually the one who convinced Amaterasu to visit earth more and see what life was like for humans. Yumigami, who used to be someone’s pet rabbit before ascending, taught Amaterasu about mochi pounding and all the yummy foods humans make.

She was really close with Waka, and was much more interested in learning about his people than Amaterasu was. The moon tribe was gone now, Yumigami was only the keeper of their graveyard, but she promised she would keep their memory safe, the good and the bad.

Orochi had sent one of his minions to lure Yumigami away from the celestial plane with delicious food. Yumigami was so disgusted by its preparation, however, that she chased the demon all the way out. Wrong formula, but the right result anyhow. With only half of the celestial bodies committed to driving out Orochi, the serpent succeeded in his attack and all the gods were forced to flee to earth. Yumigami was horrified to learn what happened and hid on the other side of the sky, away from Amaterasu, afraid she would blame her for not being there to help.

Two hundred years later, Amaterasu finally finds her, rescuing her from the belly of the Whopper. Yumigami apologizes for not helping her fight and tries to leave, but Amaterasu doesn’t blame her, she never did. They make mochi together just like old times, and Yumigami lends the goddess her power, finally letting go of her guilt.

(Also, wolf/rabbit? Eh? Eh?)

Nuregami (snake, waterspout)

Nuregami has been working with the Dragonians since even before she was a god, slithering in the shallows but unable to truly enter their kingdom. She ascended to godhood after helping in a daring mission to save the water dragon when it became trapped on land, bringing it water so it could stay alive and make it back to the ocean. She’s an important figure to the Dragonians, maintaining the mermaid ponds throughout Nippon and making sure life-sustaining water reaches every part of the land (since the water dragon takes care of the actual ocean).

The reason she was in a jar in her encounter with Amaterasu was due to Ninetails’ meddling in the capital. Blight’s sickness and the water dragon’s rampage made the water there sickly, so she was forced to remain in a jar of pure water so she would not lose her powers.

Kazegami (horse, galestorm)

Kazegami used to be a racehorse belonging to a resident of Kusa village. He ascended to godhood after losing his life to win a race for his master, who needed the prize money to save his family’s life. His body was buried under the Gale Shrine, which allowed his powers to be at their strongest there. A giant windmill was later built to take advantage of this.

Kazegami is confident, but not as arrogant as one might expect a racehorse and a god to be. He is deeply loyal to Kusa Village and humanity as a whole, maintaining the wind because he knows how they depend on it. However, he was tricked by Crimson Helm, and unwittingly made a deal which allowed the demon to assume full control of Gale Shrine. Amaterasu’s presence allowed him to come to his senses and find the confidence to break the deal, offering her his power so she could rid the shrine of the demon permanently.

Moegami (rooster, inferno)

One of the proudest gods by far, Moegami is easy to ruffle and will rarely back down from a challenge (a fact that Tachigami often takes advantage of). He’s the most passionate out of any of the gods about destroying evil, perhaps taking a bit too much joy in the “destruction” part. Nuregami often has to keep him in check while Kazegami tries to egg him on.

He was absolutely furious at Amaterasu’s first death, charging right into the moon cave for vengeance. Most of Orochi’s minions had survived, and Crimson Helm had just risen, and Moegami was ill-prepared. The demons lured him deep inside the moon cave and cast a spell on him to trap him (since truly killing a god is something only a greater demon or another god is capable of). He was trapped in those cold dark caves for many years, seething, but also keeping a close watch on the demon’s plans.

Kasugami (sheep, veil of mist)

Kasugami is a wanderer, never staying in one place for long. She’s not a great fighter by any means, preferring to avoid conflict when she can. She’s a bit ditzy and often confused, and nobody is sure if that’s due to her use of time manipulation or the alcohol. It’s probably both.

The sheep used to live in Kamui, and was good friends with Itegami. She was a follower of the twin gods of time, Nechku and Lechku, studying beneath them and learning how to manipulate time herself, to a lesser capacity. She was a loyal follower, but was slowly becoming disillusioned with their plans, and realizing that the gods were not gods at all.

Kasugami helped them create the Spirit Gate, which was her proudest creation and the culmination of all their plans. Creating this powerful relic allowed Kasugami to ascend to godhood, with power over time itself. If the role was open, that meant she had allied herself with demons after all. Lechku and Nechku, realizing their follower had grown stronger than them, sealed her away in a gourd and left her to wallow in regret. Keeping her mind fuzzy by slowing time and alcohol helps her keep her mind off the knowledge that she had helped demons spread their darkness.

Kabegami (cat, catwalk)

Kabegami is a playful deity, always down for a game of chase or a competition of acrobatics. She feels exposed on the ground, preferring to climb to any height possible at every opportunity. Multiple gods have been stood upon in her never-ending quest to avoid the terrible ground.

She and Tachigami were close friends as mortals, but during what was supposed to be a friendly competition ending with a race across a river during a storm, Tachigami betrayed her, pushing her off their raft and nearly killing her in the process. She was swept downstream for a long time, being spat out in the ocean and managing to swim to an island with a large tower. With the storm, being anywhere near the water level was unsafe, so she climbed all the way up the impossibly tall tower, something no mortal before her had ever accomplished.

Tachigami earned his godhood for his ruthlessness, and Kabegami earned hers for her resilience. She would be worshipped for hope despite everything and escape from any situation, and statues of her are erected whenever someone feels a farther reach may be necessary.

Gekigami (tiger, thunderstorm)

Oni Island was once ruled by Gekigami, and populated by many animals. Hotheaded though he was, Gekigami was a great leader and warrior, and kept the animals safe and protected every time the island shifted places. Once he became a god, he continued to watch over the island, striking down any human who tried to claim it.

One day he was approached by another god, a nine-tailed fox. She made a deal with him, allowing her to build a fortress on the island, and keeping the god of lightning enshrined so he would never lose his place. He was tricked, and the fox revealed herself to be a greater demon, but the deal had been made. Gekigami was forced to allow her followers to take residence on the island, and in return a single statue was made to enshrine the god. However, the statue was immediately broken, the lightning crossbow bolt being destroyed, which trapped Gekigami within the statue until Amaterasu restored it.

Also in my specific story Ninetails was able to harness Gekigami’s power and give it to my OC Husko but that’s not what happened in game by a long shot lol

Itegami (ox, blizzard)

While Kasugami was manipulated by demons, Itegami was not so easily fooled. He distanced himself from her (though it broke his heart) and buried himself in his work, helping the Oina survive in the harsh weather. He achieved godhood through firmness and duty, and he learned soon after of Kasugami’s fate. He was furious with himself that he had not stayed by her side when she needed guidance, but he had no idea where she had went, so he remained in the mountains to maintain the weather, harsh but predictable, always able to weather if the Oina stayed true to their customs.

One night, Itegami stood stoic on the side of a mountain, sending down blizzards as was expected of him. He was lost in thought, so full of bitterness and anger that it drew in the demons Lechku and Nechku. Sensing the god was distracted, they trapped him with a curse, sealing him inside his own shell horn. Then, they built a machine that would allow the demons to harness the god’s power. Itegami was forced to use his destructive power nonstop, burning Kamui in a blizzard that should never have happened.

Unbeknownst to the god and the demons alike, Kasugami had been freed from her prison and, sensing Itegami’s presence, ventured through Wawku shrine alone and found him. She did not have the means to free him, but she managed to contact the angry god, and tell him that she forgave him. She was never her responsibility, and he should not blame himself for her mistakes. She told him that Amaterasu was on her way, that he would be the final brush god. Itegami still did not have full control of himself, but her words calmed him somewhat.

Once Amaterasu arrived, he nearly attacked her, but Kasugami’s words finally got through to him, and he ceased attacking. He gave Amaterasu his power, but he knew how dangerous that cold could be. So, he called upon all of the celestial brush gods, and they all came, to bestow upon her the ultimate culmination of their strength and love: the solar flare.

Itegami is still of a cold and bitter disposition, but reconnecting with Kasugami and having the support of the other brush gods is helping him move on from his regret.

[dellalyra]

Imagine the continue of your latest family formation where reader has high fever and starts crying in her sleep because she's seeing satoru get killed by toji again

The kids getting worried aick because "when did gojo die?!"

And satoru not knowing how it still haunted you even after so many years

A/N: I’m sorry this took so long!! I wanted to think it through but I hope u like it bc I loved writing it!!

CW: hints at ptsd, mentions of blood and canon typical violence and sickness, angst but not really? Soft soft soft soft

Family Formations • Kind

You were tossing and turning in your sleep, fever from the flu still wreaking havoc on your body. Satoru was worried, but luckily, he had Shoko on speed dial – and she would never let anything happen to her precious best friend. You had kicked the sheets off long ago, and the mumbling had started rather funny.

“Satoru you can’t take home a seal from the beach.”

“Megumi let go of Satoru’s hair.”

“Get that stick outta your ass Nanami – you used to smoke blunts on the school roof.”

He was loving it; it was like a free stand-up show!

But then, you started to whimper. He had fallen asleep, and it took some time to rouse him from his slumber but what woke him up was you sobbing in your sleep.

“Please no, please don’t take him from me. Please, not him. Not again. I can’t watch ‘Toru die again, please god NO NO NO NO!” At this point he was kissing your head, whispering your name to wake you from the fever dream, tears in his own eyes because he knew what you were dreaming of.

You gasp awake and bolt upright, wrapping your arms around him.

You stay sobbing in his arms as he consoles you.

“It’s okay, Princess - I’m here. It was just a dream, I’m safe, you’re safe, and the kids are safe. Nothing gonna happen again, okay? He’s gone. Nothing can take me from you again.”

You had been there; you had seen the father of the kid in the next room over. You had heard the burst of the blade through your love’s pale throat, the ivory skin turning crimson red in an instant as he gasped and choked. He had died in your arms. You had screamed and cried and managed to lodge a vine through the shoulder of the man who had done.

But he was here. He fought his way back to you.

You ran your shaking hands over his face and torso – as if checking for injuries.

“I saw it all again, he came back. He had you and he did it again and I couldn’t move and then you were dead again.” You sobbed into his shoulder. He hated seeing you this way, he still had nightmares of the day himself – sometimes the true events, sometimes reversed.

As your breathing steadied, he unwrapped himself from you.

“I’m gonna make you a hot chocolate, okay? I’ll be right back.”

You nodded, sniffing into your Kurama plush.

Satoru opened the door to your room.

And he wasn’t prepared for two wide eyes faces on the other side looking up at him.

“Shit.” He spoke. He knew they’d heard, they’re faces told the whole story.

“You died, papa?” Tsumiki whispered.

Your head perked up at the voice.

“Shit.” You agree.

Megumi’s wide eyes and uneasy stance mirror his sisters.

There was no avoiding this conversation, even at 2am.

Satoru looks at you, you echo his panicked look. Fuck, you two are only 21! How do you explain all this.

“C’mere, come sit on the bed for a minute.” You were past the infectious stage now, so it didn’t matter if they got close. They did as say. Tsumiki crawling up to sit facing you and Megumi dragging his frog plush up to sit beside you. Satoru takes his own side of the bed.

“I’m sorry you guys heard that. I was having a really bad dream which made me feel a bit scared.” You pet their little heads.

“Did you really die?” Megumi pipes up, eyes focused on Satoru.

“Yeah, kid. A long time ago. I got pretty badly hurt and I died for a minute, but I used my technique to bring myself back.” He softly says, and these are the moments that you realise how great a father he really is.

“How did you get hurt?” Tsumiki asks, quietly.

You lock eyes with your boyfriend. They’re too young for the truth right now.

“He got hurt trying to keep a little girl safe.” You add.

They’re silent for a minute.

“Who hurt you?” Megumi asked.

“A really, really strong man. I wasn’t as strong as I am now – and I was tired.” Satoru adds.

Another bout of silence.

“Will the man come back?” Megumi asks again. At this point, there’s fresh tears on your cheeks.

“No, baby. He’s never coming back.” You pet the boy's hair. You’re not going to tell him the man in question was his father, 8 years old is too young for the truth.

“How can, you be sure?” Tsumiki’s voice wavers, and she moves closer to Satoru. She’s worried, you can’t appease her worries by just saying he went away, a grain of truth will do.

“Because he died, sweetheart. He can’t hurt anyone anymore.”

“Are you sure he died? Because Satoru died but he came back.” Megumi questions, ever too smart for his age.

“Hey! I’m unique little man, only the strongest can do that.” He winks, but humour won’t work now.

“We’re sure he died honey.” You nod at the boy.

“How are you sure?” Tsumiki interjects, Jesus you’re getting the fifth degree here at 2am.

You both quiet for a second.

“Because I’m the one who did it, ‘Miki.” He grasped her little hand.

Funnily, that seems to ease both their worries. What these kids have been through, it astounds you – not that you or Satoru had it any easier.

However, it’s a testament to their trust in you both. They know that Satoru would kill for them, and you would too. They feel safest when you two are the ones handling the issues, because they will forever be safe with you both.

“And it makes you sad, because you were there Mama?” Tsumiki asks, petting your hair, as if she’s the one to comfort you.

“I was, angel. I was very scared, and sometimes when bad things happen your brain remembers them, and that’s why sometimes we have nightmares.”

“Were you hurt?” Megumi asks.

“No honey, I was just very scared and very sad. You see, I love Satoru so much that I felt like I was dying too, because of how much my heart hurt. Him and I are made of the same star, and that’s why we love each other so much. So sometimes I get bad dreams of it happening – but I promise you both. We’re all safe now.” You pull all three of them into you, whispering ‘I love you’ to Satoru.

After a minute of family hugging, Satoru leaps up.

“I’ll be right back, 4 cups of hot chocolate with extra cream for Tsumiki, extra cinnamon for Megumi, extra marshmallows for my princess and extra sugar for me!” He does a silly walk out the door to make the kids laugh – well, Tsumiki laughs, Megumi rolls his eyes.

They snuggle in between your pillow and Satoru’s.

“Does everyone get someone made of the same star, mama?” Megumi asks.

You smile at him.

“Some people get lots of people, some people get friends, some get boyfriends or girlfriends. There’s matches out there for everyone, in all ways. Some people know them forever, some people only meet when they’re really old. Your papa and I were lucky to reunite when we were so young.” You muse.

“I hope mine is a Prince, or a handsome King!” Tsumiki says.

“You’d make a great Queen, ‘Miki.” You giggle with her.

“I hope mine is kind.” Megumi quietly muses. Your sweet soft boy, so much more sensitive than he pretends.

The other half of your star walks back in at that moment, holding a tray of mugs – steaming and overflowing with cocoa.

You all curl up in your California King Bed that night, you and Satoru holding hands over the heads of the kids between you – Tsumiki by Satoru, and Megumi by you. You lock eyes and smile as they both fall asleep.

“Goodnight, Princess.”

“Goodnight, ‘Toru.”

7 years later, Megumi’s other half of his star came barrelling into his life, all smiles and pink hair and chaos – but as he had hoped, completely and utterly kind.

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Matilda - Harry Styles