#I used to give my (prescribed) adderall to druggies for free in high school because it made them like me more š¬
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wilson is like one of those bitches who puts nicotine patches on their partner in their sleep so that theyāll subconsciously crave their presence and associate their time together with the gratification of it. except instead of doing it sneakily, he openly (even reluctantly) exists as the main source of houseās vicodin prescriptions, not only providing him with the high but maintaining this pavlovian dynamic where he actively contributes to houseās pain relief & survival. heās essentially his lifeline. and for the most part, he doesnāt even do it on purpose!!! because aside from the literal drug connection, thatās what his friendship is to house, too. what bonnie said about how wilson just tries to be a Good and Normal friend but āonce youāre the subject of all that attention, itās addictiveā. in season 8, he says āI cannot be responsible for the happiness of gregory house.ā and then has the audacity to look shocked when foreman replies, āYou are responsible, though.ā itās like heās painfully aware of their fucked up codependency but simply turns his face away from it. heās even in denial until the very last moment, until itās not only his upcoming death on the horizon, but the knowledge that theyāre both free. I always found his smile after āIām dead, wilsonā a little chilling. because it feels like he knows what that means ā the larger, lethal implications of house disregarding any worry about his own future ā and only then is he done fighting it.
#sorry if this is incoherent#house md#hilson#house/wilson#james wilson#greg house#gregory house#I can see house doing the nicotine thing fr but I canāt see wilson doing it covertly#simply because he can never keep it quiet when he pulls off a covert little manipulation#heās too proud of himself#most of the insane boundary-violating things that house has done heās only done to satiate his own curiosity#but wilson does them specifically for houseās validation#like the antidepressant thing or the healthy eating#he knows house loves it when heās a manipulative bitch#so heād never keep it a secret#whereas house has probably violated every law of privacy towards him w/o ever mentioning it#I need to study them under a microscope etc etc#also can you tell that my personal experience is bleeding into this a little bit#I used to give my (prescribed) adderall to druggies for free in high school because it made them like me more š¬#and I gaslit myself into thinking I was doing them a solid / doing a positive thing#as if I wasnāt just depriving myself of medication that I needed as well as feeding the addiction of unhealthily high-reliant kids#processing my own issues via james wilson meta >>#Iām also now realising that this teeters into the horrors of mortality a little bit more than just doomed old man yaoi#iām sorry iāve spent a year in the hannibal fandom I forgor weāre not meant to casually drop references to percieved suicide pacts#between our blorblos
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