#I truly miss when the holidays were actually festive and fun and not just whatever the hell it is today

[louisianimal]

It's Christmas Eve and its grey and rainy outside, not even cold to want to be cozy. I'm just happy I'm off today and can spend the day just laying around lazily with my babe and watch Christmas movies.

[ellowynthenotking]

Apr 22

Dear Dad,

There wasn’t much to do to make money at the festival. Like, at all, really. I don’t even think I saw any money-trading hands. It seemed mostly just goods were being traded for other stuff. Which is, I suppose, more normal than all cash trading. Selling stuff, that is. And it seemed like most people in the area knew each other. They all greeted each other by name, and they kept asking who my group was related to. It was odd, I mean, you’d think they knew we weren’t related to anyone there, but they all asked anyway. Zunair started throwing out random names, and people seemed to believe him. 

Odd situation. Very odd. 

But there was a lot of dancing, lots of it. All the time, even when there wasn’t music, there was dancing. People danced, set up stalls, walked down the street, and danced to talk to their friends. 

It was more standardized than most of the dances I’ve seen throughout this kingdom. They all had specific steps, and it seemed like everyone, and I do mean everyone, knew them. But I feel like I knew many of the steps to many of the dances at the end of the day. No one thought twice about teaching us to play when they saw that we didn’t know. And I wasn’t afraid to ask for help. It was a fun way to meet people, actually. They were all very excited about the festival and what was going on and wanted to share all about it and all about whatever they’d made. 

I learned a lot while here! It is mostly about art and the like of the area and the very fancy and fermented food they make. They make a kind of drink out of absolutely terrible potatoes, but they drink it for celebrations. They also make a few other drinks that are apparently common to trade. I didn’t try any of them because I’m pretty sure it’s all alcoholic, but it was cool that they traded drinks and stuff as part of the celebrations. 

Riley talked to the people in charge here to see if they knew anything to help us, but they won’t talk business on holidays. Business is really anything related to magic, cults, transportation, or anything that would require them to do a little heavy thinking on their days off.

Festival days, I mean. But it’s probably basically their day off. They probably don’t get to celebrate very often. But then again, maybe they do, and it's just that this whole world seems to constantly be in some state of party. Not that it’s good luck, but we keep stumbling into places with various festivals and holy days. 

It’s still kind of good luck, even if it happens all the time. It’d be bad luck if we kept narrowly missing them and could not get the free food and stuff that people seem to hand out in droves during festivals. 

We might stick around a bit if they won’t talk business but will feed us; well, that’s a pretty good reason to stay. I mean, we are being magically hunted, so we need to deal with that sooner or later, but really, at this point, we’re a bit stuck no matter what we do. If we leave, we won’t be able to get whatever help these people can provide. If we don’t go, we are giving the donkey cult people a better chance of catching up with us. All around, these are not great options, and while I really hope that the cult doesn’t find us and would like to continue having them not see us, I think being able to rest properly for a day or two is what I want more than anything. 

We’ll figure it out. 

The spring festival is all about welcoming the new, new people, new growth, new changes, and new stuff. According to one guy I was talking to, they don’t accept money during the festival. You’re not welcoming something new with it; it’s the same old. But when there’s something truly new, everyone profits and gets something they want. He said it’s also the time of year when people announce the births from the last year, plans to wed, and plans to travel. 

Another big part of this town’s traditions is encouraging people to travel somewhere new when they’re young. Spend a year or more out in the world, see the good and the bad, and then come home, maybe with a spouse if that’s what you’re into. It helps bring money and such back to the village while also getting that wild youth out so you can settle down properly.  

It's a funny tradition to me, but if it works, it works. It also explains why everyone is asking who we’re related to. Even though the village isn’t that big, it makes sense that there’s a good chance I’m related to someone somewhere here, and I’ve either come back from my trip or am here on my trip.  

There isn't a lot of free food everywhere, though. That’s the only thing that’s a little bit of a struggle. We don’t have a lot of stuff to trade for food, so we’re mostly coasting. 

We’re going to help a little bit in exchange for food and board; it still fits into the feeling, the goal of the festival, and then we don’t starve to death or eat all of the rations we managed to capture on our way out of the city. It is a little bit of an issue, though. We don’t even know what needs doing, so we’re just hoping for the best and the chance to rest. Even if it’s not exactly resting cause we’re still doing stuff, it’s better knowing I can go back to the inn and rest a bit if I want to. And maybe the slight sea-sick feeling will go away if I’m on blessedly solid ground for a while without needing to get on the cart. 

It had gone away when we were in the city, but I don’t remember how long it took.

The food is usually my favorite part of the festivals. Most of the time, people seem to avoid adding flavor to their meals, but when the festival times come around, everyone does. And everything smells fantastic here, so I know the food will be great if I get some. I did get some bread that was actually really tasty to help set up this morning, but it was still just bread. Although the bread had fruit inside, it was really, really tasty. I don’t know what the fruit was, though; maybe it’s another local fruit or local delicacy or something. 

Who knows. 

We did get to see some of everyone’s cool winter crafts. There’s not much to do in the winter but make, so there were lots of new clothes and decorations. It was amazing to see it all and know that all these people have worked so hard on some of these things for months. I found the cooking pots and stuff We’d wanted to buy in the cart, which was a win. I had nothing to trade for it, so I asked Reese to figure out something we could trade. No idea what I ended up giving them, but when I went to get stuff out of the cart later, they were there. So I hope he didn’t steal them, but we have them now! 

Most of the evening was spent watching the dances they performed—the very cool, very good, very complex dances. There were tons of them! And all kinds of people were taking part. 

Sometimes, it looked like people were doing it for fun or to show off, which, if I could do these dances, I would show off with, too. 

Riley was asked to take part in a dance; I think she only agreed because the guy who asked her was kind of cute, but boy, did it not go the way I think she wanted it to. 

Because she was terrible at it. Like, two left feet bad. Like accidentally knocked herself and the guy she was dancing with over. It was really, really bad, actually. 

She stormed off because she was embarrassed, which I understand, but I also think that was worse than if she’d just laughed it off. She returned to the inn, but I wanted to stick around and enjoy the party. I hope she’s not too upset about it. 

I mean, it was funny. Obviously, she and the guy weren’t hurt, but storming off was a lot worse than if she’d just stayed and laughed. But having everyone laugh at her couldn’t have felt good. And we were all laughing at her, too.

I’m going to try to talk to her later. I should have probably gone and talked to her when it happened or when she stormed off instead of sticking around. I’ll talk to her in the morning; she was asleep when we entered the inn again.

I’ll write to you later, maybe tomorrow or maybe after. I don’t know how long the festival will last or how long it’ll be until we can get out of here. So if we’re still here tomorrow, then I’ll probably write to you tomorrow. 

Are there any festivals like this back home? Where it’s all just trading? Or dancing. I mean, new years is kinda like embracing the new portion, but this feels different from that. It’s not about the new year new you, but it is about the new everything. Everything is new for it. 

This might be a better way of celebrating than making a bunch of promises to yourself that you and everyone around you know you’re going to break. Which is kind of dumb. Why do it in the first place, then? 

It’s probably dumber since I actually did it, and I don’t think any of the resolutions I made are actually up to me. So, I’ve probably already broken them by not trying harder to do them.

Oops.

Anyway, I’ll write to you when I can. I hope you’re doing okay. 

Love, Jack

Read the rest of the series here: 

Or read more by this author here: 

[lifeofkaze]

An Art of Balance #12

 Word Count: ~ 2.400

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Chapter 12: Secret Santa

December had come around, bringing with it the heaps of snow Hogwarts had been spared from so far. Within days it buried everything in sight under a thick white blanket, transforming the landscape outside into a powdery winter wonderland.

Peeves had took it as his personal assignment to dump a heap of snow on every unsuspecting passer-by from questionable heights until Professor McGonagall publicly threatened to turn him into a Christmas cracker if she saw him with so much as a single snowflake in his unsubstantial hands again.

And as the castle was slowly but surely covered in ornaments and twinkling lights, the festive spirit spread into even the most remote corners of the dungeons.

It had become tradition for the Hufflepuff team to celebrate the holidays in their own way. Even back when Orion hadn’t been captain, the team used to gather after the last practise of the year for a small get-together in the Common Room, including a game of Secret Santa.

Whereas the idea of material gifts had never posed much of an interest to him, Orion couldn’t deny the astounding effect the game had on the rest of the team. The excitement of receiving a present from someone unknown positively electrified his friends. Consulting the ones closest to your assigned person for a suitable gift never failed to knit their team closer together.

So he had just continued entertaining this ritual after he had stepped up into his position. Especially this year, they could do with a little bit of festive unison.

The snowfall had increased again just as they were wrapping up their last manoeuvres. Everyone practically jumped off their broomsticks to retreat into the comforting warmth and light of the Common Room.  

McNully was already waiting for them as they entered through the narrow passageway, a trail of melted snow dragging on behind them. A small jute pouch adorned with an embroidered Christmas Tree rested on his lap. Fully immersed in the festive spirit, he was sporting a particularly nasty sweater picturing a badger dancing with a raven instead of his usual white shirt and tie. His golden snitch was still pinned to his chest, however.  

He wiggled his eyebrows in anticipation as they all got changed into their yellow and black team sweaters and settled down around him. A pot of hot chocolate was passed around, the warm smell spreading in the Common Room as each player poured themselves a cup, glad for something to put their freezing hands around.

McNully reached into the pouch and started mixing up the slips of parchment he had prepared in advance while reminding them of the rules.

“It is time for our annual Christmas draw, ladies and gentlemen! As we have some new faces to join in on the fun this year,” he inclined his head towards Everett, “I will present to you the rules once again.”

Orion shook his head with a chuckle. Murphy McNully, forever the presenter.

“Everyone is to draw a name of another member of the team. You have time until Christmas Day to buy, craft or create a suitable present for your assigned person. You may not reveal your identity to them unless they guess correctly. You are not to reveal your draw to another person unless your un-festive mind can’t think of anything to gift and needs creative assistance. If you fail to deliver on your task, I will brand you a Christmas troll and announce it publicly on your next friendly.”

Orion bit back a laugh at Murphy’s newest addition to the rules. His friend took the holidays very seriously.

They all took their turn lining up and dove their hands into the pouch, pulling out a neatly folded piece of parchment. The reactions to the names written on them ranged from relief over confusion to horror when it was a particularly difficult person to find a gift for. Orion found it fascinating to observe.

Laughter erupting from one of the armchairs drew his attention. Skye slumped in it while Lizzie was sitting on the floor with her back against the yellow armrest. Lucy had just showed her parchment to them, looking more chagrined than anything. Upon reading what was written on it, Skye had whispered something to them, prompting the girls to burst into laughter.

“You are not supposed to show who you got just yet!” Murphy scolded the girls. Spreading Christmas joy was a very serious business to him.

“Sorry!” Lizzie tried to appease him while still shaking from suppressed laughter. “Just go on!” Skye muttered something into her ear, drawing another set of giggles from her.

With an indignant huff Murphy returned to monitor the drawing while Orion quietly observed the scene. There were still some stray snowflakes hanging in her hair which was curling around her face as it dried in the warm air of the room. Her cheeks had turned red from laughing at Skye’s joke, a smile lingering on her lips, reaching up into her eyes.

He hadn’t seen Lizzie as carefree since what had happened back at the concert a few weeks prior. Everyone but McNully had left Hogsmeade soon after she had suddenly disappeared. They had found her in the Common Room, curled up in front of the fireplace, nose buried in a book and Mouse snuggled up on her lap. She had retreated to her dorm almost immediately after their arrival.

Neither of them had mentioned what had happened with so much as even a word. It wasn’t like Orion had a problem with that. He wasn’t entirely sure himself in what direction they had set their steps that day, or why he couldn’t get a hold of the reason everything had gone out of hand. It was like smoke, evading his grasp as soon as he tried to set his mind on unravelling what had taken place between them.

But he had noticed how Lizzie had started avoiding his company. Where she had been perfectly comfortable around him before, she now made sure someone was with her at all times, positively clinging to Skye when they had practise or her friend Rowan during their tutoring lessons.

It was this change of atmosphere Orion felt truly sorry about. He considered his friends his family and Lizzie actively seeking her distance from him unsettled him more than he cared to admit. It had never been his intention to cross a line. Like  a fool, he had let himself get carried away in the spur of the moment. He should have known better by now.

He missed chatting with her in the greenhouse the most. Lizzie was one of the few people seeing beyond him being the captain of the Hufflepuff team. She was actually listening to what he had to say. Instead of tuning out when she didn’t understand his point, she gave his words a thought until she had figured it out.  

As much as he longed to equilibrate their friendship again, he would have never forced her to talk to him if she clearly did not wish to do so.

Perhaps it was a good thing the Christmas break was so close. For the first time in years Orion was glad almost everyone was returning home for the holidays. Having the Common Room mostly to himself was the perfect occasion to take a step back and regain the balance he had been struggling to maintain as of late.

He wasn’t the only one watching the chuckling group of girls, however.

Everett seemed to be oddly interested in their conversation as well, his intense gaze trailing Lizzie’s every movement. Sensing Orion’s attention shifting to him, he suddenly perked his head up. His grey eyes narrowed as they made contact with Orion, an unspoken challenge hanging in the air between them.

Orion had no interest in a fight with him, so he merely held his gaze with level eyes. It took Everett a moment, but eventually, he broke the contact and turned away.

“Why is he looking at you like that?” McNully had finished monitoring the draw and came over to him. Everyone else was chatting excitedly about gift ideas and the upcoming break by now.

Orion’s eyes followed Everett as he got up and strutted over to the boys sharing their dorm. Maybe choosing him for the team had not been the wisest decision after all.

“People with strong characters like him often feel the inherent need to establish a hierarchy between them and others they deem a threat to their dominance,” Orion responded, half lost in thought.

“A threat, you?” McNully chortled.

He had to smile at his poor choice of words. “While I may not portray a dominant character, as captain I do fill the most prominent position in this team,” he explained his meaning. “I consider every one of us a vital piece of the greater picture and I find rivalries within our team to be unfortunate; we should always strive for unison. Because without unison, how can we reach a common goal?”

McNully stared after their roommate, silently calculating. “Whatever this is about, if he happened to have drawn your name, I’d like to inform you that there is the small possibility of 9.2 % that a present from him might be really unpleasant.”

His face suddenly lit up again and he shoved the almost empty pouch in Orion’s face. “Speaking of which, there’s only you and I left now.”

Not being half as enthusiastic as his friend, Orion waved him on. “Go ahead, I’ll take the last one.”

McNully pulled one of the two remaining slips of parchment out of the bag. A grin spread on his face when he read the name written on it. “Oh, that’s a tough one,” he mused, grey eyes sparkling. “Brilliant! I like a good challenge.”

He upended the pouch into his hand and handed the last parchment to Orion; he always took the one that was left.

The corner of his mouth quirked up in a wry smile as he read the name written on it. Apparently, the universe had his own twisted sense of humour.

“Who’d you get to make you grin like that?”

Skye had suddenly appeared by his side, craning her head to catch a glimpse of the piece of paper between Orion’s fingers. He shifted his arm slightly to block her view and folded it up again.

“Skye, are you coming? We need to finish that Charms essay before the library closes,” Lizzie called over to her friend. She had gotten to her feet, her hand resting only lightly on the back of the armchair. She seemed very eager to leave the scene.

“Go ahead if you don’t want to wait, I’ll catch up to you.”

Lizzie hesitated for a moment before stepping back towards the group. She rubbed her hands against her arm and joined them, albeit subtly standing as far away from Orion as possible without it looking suspicious. He noticed it anyway.

Their eyes met for the briefest moment as she caught him looking at her and she immediately dropped her gaze, suddenly very invested in pulling on a loose thread at the hem of her sweater.

Skye tried to use his distraction to her advantage. With a quick movement she attempted to snatch the piece of parchment he was still holding between his index and his middle finger out of his hand.

“You are not supposed to know!” McNully shooed her away as Orion tucked the paper into the pocket of his pants.

“Don’t violate the rules, Skye Parkin, I’m warning you!” McNully scowled at her. “Lucy shouldn’t have shown you her parchment either. What was so funny about it anyway?”

Skye stuck her tongue out at him. “Of course, now you want to know.” She snickered again. “Lucy got Everett and has no idea what to get him. I told her maybe a braincell or two wouldn’t hurt.”

Orion tried to suppress his grin in vain, while even Lizzie started giggling again. Everett really didn’t seem to be the most popular member of their team.

“This is not what this game is about!” Murphy scolded, but he was grinning at Skye’s suggestion all the same. “Don’t ruin the Christmas spirit with your bad jokes.”

They were the only ones left in front of the fireplace. The other members of their team had one after the other filed away, now minding their own business. Skye sat down on the armrest of the sofa, resting her feet on the cushions.

“Speaking of Christmas, what are your plans this year?”

“I’m with my mum and grandma of course ,” Murphy told them while pointedly pushing Skye’s feet off the seat again. “Orion is going stay at the castle, I presume?”

Orion inclined his head. He always stayed at Hogwarts if he could.

“I’ll be with my family as well,” Lizzie added to the conversation. “We haven’t had a family Christmas for two years in a row now. My parents have been visiting my brother Jacob in the States.”

“I remember; you were at Weasley’s place for the past two years, weren’t you?” Skye mused. “That was when you and him- “

“Exactly; I’m really looking forward to being home for a bit,” Lizzie shut her friend up hurriedly.

Orion could see her cheeks blush slightly. He wondered why she was so intent on silencing Skye.

“It’ll be great to spend a bit of time with my family,” she quickly continued, brushing over Skye’s protest. “I’ll probably meet Penny some time as well; her family doesn’t live far from us.”

Skye had stopped protesting at her words; a sad expression shone in her eyes. The relationship between her and Penny was still strained, as far as Orion was aware.

He watched the girls chatter on about Christmas in silence. He saw Skye lean in to Lizzie. Although he didn’t mean to overhear their conversation, Skye was talking too loudly for him not to hear her words.

“You’re meeting Penny?” she asked silently. “Do you think you could talk to her on my behalf? Things are still so weird and I just want this to be over with,” she pleaded.

Lizzie shrugged. “Sure, I can try.”

“Smashing!”

Orion was still thinking about Skye’s request after the girls had left for the library and he and McNully had started a round of Wizards Chess. The Christmas break came at exactly the right time. It was an opportunity to look at things from a healthy distance and to get things back to order.

Apparently, he wasn’t the only one who was desperately in need of it.

[oceanselevenism]

If you're still doing them maybe number 12 with both the ocean's siblings and their partners?

hell yeah!! i’ve put it under the cut :)) it is Very Tangentially holiday-sweater-related but it is too long to not post now! hope you enjoy, and happy holidays :))

It’s the first Christmas they’ve spent together in... nearly a decade and a half, actually. The years had flown by, blurring into a mess of run-ins and arguments and you stay on your side, I’ll stay on mine, but hey, Danny can’t fault his sister for wanting to make up for lost time. No, he can’t fault her (after all, if she had been the one to fake her death, he’d probably have moved into her house for a week, just to make sure she didn’t do it again) but he can make fun of her, so that’s what he does. “Aw, you really did miss me,” he says when she gives him and Rusty perfunctory hugs on her way into his house (Lou just claps them both on the shoulder, and he’s not sure whether to feel snubbed or relieved). “I can’t believe my dear sister actually cares,” he tells her when she brings him a mug of cocoa, ingredients nabbed from some billionaire in Germany. “Pure family bonding for the whole family,” he remarks when she goes off on a drunken, expletive-filled tangent about the Met Gala’s security over a game of poker (they’ve given up on trying to enforce the no-cheating rule, and he’s pretty sure Lou takes the opportunity to peek at Debbie’s cards). But in all honesty, he can’t keep up the ribbing; it really is good to see her, even if she definitely gets along better with Rusty (she’s told him as much, and right to his face, too) and the third day ends in a bitter, wine-fueled not-argument about their mother and their father and they themselves. But on the fourth morning Danny gets up early (it’s five in the goddamn morning, why the fuck has Lou already left a note on the counter saying gone on a run) to make latkes, and when Debbie comes downstairs she scoops out a dollop of his favorite sour cream instead of her usual applesauce, so unless her latke preferences have done a complete 180 since the last time he’s seen her, they’ve forgiven each other.

She and Lou volunteer to go on a grocery run that evening, and Danny’s glad; he hasn’t had the chance to jump Rusty’s bones in, like, five days (turns out cleaning up for houseguests takes up way more time than anticipated) (hey, the only people they’ve had over in years have been the crew from the Benedict job, and he’s heard Reuben threaten to shit on Turk’s feet, they don’t need to clean up for them). And for a minute, as Rusty pins him up next to the to-be-composted bag that is currently overflowing with potato scraps, the only thought in his head is the usual why didn’t we do this sooner. But then Rusty pulls back-- “Rus,” Danny complains-- and he tilts his head in that We Need To Talk manner. Which would be hot, if not for the fact that Rusty probably wants to talk about Debbie.

“You’re good, right?”

“We were never on bad terms.”

“Liar.”

“Well, hostile terms, maybe,” Danny amends. “But never bad.”

Rusty shifts, adjusting his forearms so it’s more like they’re just two good pals having a conversation three inches from each others’ faces instead of two good pals about to do very unsanitary things in a kitchen, and says, “I think you’re putting too much water under the bridge.”

“What am I, a Dutch engineer?”

“You’re very funny.”

“I know I am. Now, are we gonna--”

The door opens. Danny swears. “We were gone for twenty minutes,” Debbie says. “Are you that desperate?” Danny regrets going for the open-concept first floor, and he regrets it even more as Rusty pushes himself off with an air of utmost nonchalance.

“Here,” Lou says, lobbing a ball of fabric at Rusty. Her aim is remarkable, and Danny almost asks if she ever played softball before deciding he likes his well-being more than teasing his sister’s motorcycle-riding, brass-knuckle-owning girlfriend. It’s fine; next to him, Rusty huffs an amused laugh at the unsaid comment anyway. “Happy Christmas Eve.”

Rusty unfolds the fabric to reveal a truly hideous (and possibly offensive) Christmas sweater. It’s got red sleeves, a green torso, and a large, colorful fruitcake emblazoned on the stomach. Above it, in red and yellow, is text that reads FRUIT CAKE. “I love it,” Rusty says, pressing his lips together in that way that says he’s trying his damndest not to laugh. “It’s perfect.”

Lou opens her coat to reveal her own sweater, hers saying Ho Ho Homo. “I thought the theme was appropriate.”

“And for you, dearest brother,” Debbie says, pulling an atrociously-colored wad of wool out of a paper bag and chucking it at him, “you get the best of both worlds.”

With a mounting sense of horror, he recalls the year that he insisted on putting teal and orange streamers across the house, because it’s Hanukkah and Christmas mixed! That was the last year their parents had lived in the same house; Danny used to joke that it had been the final nail in the coffin for their mother. He pinches an edge of the cloth between two fingers and lets the rest fall open. It’s a Miami Dolphins holiday sweater. A teal-and-orange, festively-patterned Miami Dolphins sweater. Oh, his Boston-bred father would be frothing at the mouth. “We’re in Canada,” Danny says, equal parts shocked and awed. “How the hell did you get this here so quick? We were supposed to be meeting in Quebec until three days ago--”

“Danny, please learn what priority shipping is,” Debbie says. “Now c’mon. Wear it.”

There’s no way he can back out of this. If he refuses, she’ll just play the I thought you were dead card. He’s never regretted a decision more.

He puts on the sweater. Rusty-- his partner, his right hand, the love of his life-- wolf-whistles.

“I’m divorcing you,” Danny announces.

“Don’t worry,” Lou says with a grin, and is that her phone oh fuck she’s got a picture-- “Debbie, take off your coat.”

With the air of someone who has suffered the weight of the world, Debbie shrugs off her jacket. She’s wearing a matching sweater, and the dolphin on this one has a lovingly-embroidered smiling mouth stitched into it. Danny tries very, very hard not to laugh. “Shut it,” Debbie warns him.

“Oh, I’m not saying a thing,” Danny replies.

“We actually did get groceries,” Lou says, turning back to the door, “so--”

“Lemme give you a hand,” Rusty says. “Let these two bask in the joy of their new sweaters.”

“Fuck off,” Danny and Debbie say in unison. Rusty grins, cheery as ever, and leaves Danny’s side to follow Lou out the door.

“Great gift,” Danny says. “I’ll be laughed at by Reuben for the rest of my days.”

Debbie snorts, walking into the kitchen and rooting around in his cabinets. “Well, actually he’d-- wait, please tell me you didn’t, like, have gross old people se--”

“Shut up, Deborah,” Danny replies, feeling his neck heat up. “I’m only two years older than you. And no.” He refrains from adding on a “not this time.”

“Thank God,” Debbie says, pulling a glass out of the cupboard. “Anyway. Reuben’s not gonna laugh at you, he’s just gonna talk about your embarrassing baby stories in whatever groupchat you people have.”

Danny wonders how his baby sister got to be cooler than him. It’s very distressing. “That’s worse.”

“Yep,” she says, putting the pitcher down and picking her now-full glass up. She leans on the wall across from him, sipping her water, and narrows her eyes at him. “Are we, y’know... good?”

“Why wouldn’t we be?” Danny says. Besides the thirty years of vaguely pretending the other didn’t exist.

“I’m not gonna answer that,” Debbie says. “But... I’d just like to make sure. ‘Cause you’re the only not-completely-insufferable blood relation I have.”

Neither of them say anything for a moment; Danny picks at a loose teal thread, trying to think of how best to phrase the thoughts rattling around in his head. “I don’t hate you,” he finally says. “And I don’t dislike you, either. You’re a pretty good sister. And a great thief.”

“I know,” she replies. “I’m not gonna say it back, ‘cause then you’re gonna get an inflated ego.”

“Works for me,” Danny says, grinning a little.

“I guess it’s just... I mean, I let all the old resentment get in the way of, y’know. Having a decent relationship, personally or professionally.”

Danny nods. He’s still got the scar from the time they both went after the Ruby of the Isle; he’d won, but just barely, and only because he had Rusty and she hadn’t found Lou. But at the end of the day, neither of them have tried to kill the other, and they still did grow up together, playing in Atlantic City casinos and building sand castles under the boardwalk. “I think we’re too old for that now.”

“You’re the old one here,” Debbie replies, no bite in the remark.

“Only two years,” he reminds her. “But I did the same thing as you, letting petty grudges get in the way of family, and for that I’m sorry.”

“I am, too.”

“Thanks, Debs.” He frowns. “They’re taking a really long time to get the groceries, aren’t they?”

As if summoned, the door opens, and Rusty and Lou, each with a measly two bags in their hands, walk in. And Rusty has his phone in his hands. “Rus, I swear--”

“Too late,” Rusty grins, as the shutter sound rings out through the living room. “That outfit has already been immortalized.”

“Have I already said I’m divorcing you? I’m divorcing you.”

“Does it count as fratricide if he’s your brother-in-law?” Debbie asks.

“Disproportionate reactions,” Rusty accuses. “Besides, I’ve already sent it to Linus.”

Danny’s eyes widen. “Not Linus.”

“You heard me.”

His phone vibrates in his pocket. It’s a text from Linus Caldwell himself, consisting of a single thumbs-up emoji and two grinning cats. “You’re all terrible people. Terrible, terrible people.”

(the sweater rusty is wearing is real) (as is lou’s) (and the ocean siblings’)

[milkygcf]

UNDER THE MISTLETOE

Pairing | knj x gender-neutral reader

Genre | tooth-rotting fluff i think, established relationship

Warnings | just a tiny bit of cursing, the boys are a chaotic mess

Summary | ❝ Nothing can beat a holiday spent with Namjoon.❞

Word Count | 4.1k

Author’s Note | THIS IS AN ABSOLUTE MESS I’M SORRY 😭🙏 i rush wrote this so i could put up something for christmas. nonetheless, i hope whoever reads this enjoys it! also, big thanks to @youarejesting​ for the banner! i love it, it’s so cute :( another little side note is, this is also part of @btscreatorscorner​‘s Crystal Snow Event! make sure to take a look at all the other works :] happy holidays!

Christmas with Namjoon is always a wild ride. From hectic decoration shopping to disastrous baking, to actual decorating and singing Christmas songs together. However, it's not like you're complaining, because as rowdy as Christmas time can be with your significant other, nothing can beat a holiday spent with Namjoon.

Every year is an open door to new shenanigans, handmade gifts and memories that embed themselves warmly into your heart. This year isn't any different, except for the fact that the rest of the group were joining for dinner - along with the chaos they always brought along with them. As close as you are with your boyfriend, not even your connection could beat theirs. It's heart-warming - as much as they argue, nothing could possibly tear them apart. Nothing could bring you any more serotonin than the jovial smile that attacks Namjoon's handsome features whenever they're around.

Now, you’re all nearing your thirties - except for Jungkook, he was still bearing life without early back problems - and you suppose you all look the part as well. Unless it's Christmas season and the young man himself proposes they all compete in a Best Decorated House competition between themselves. The winner earns himself an extra present from every participant - which you find rather amusing because you're pretty sure they were willing to buy each other the world in a blink of an eye. The loser, however, gets to wash every dish used during dinner. Ouch.

"Deal!" Namjoon hollers, finger pointed up in agreement, his chest puffed out in pride. You know he's going to stress about it later on because as much as you love the man, he's absolute shit when it comes to decorating. If it weren't for you, his house would be a shit-show. Sorry, Namjoon.

"Can't wait to beat all of your sorry asses!" Seokjin yells even louder, an arm hooked around Yoongi's waist. The energy he radiates astonishes you because even if he's the eldest from the lot, he's always the energetic one. Seokjin might as well be your icon.

And that's how it all began - the calm before the storm. But then again, them proposing this very idea wasn't exactly calm.

You feel a shy tap on your shoulder while you're busy scanning through your fifth isle. Namjoon holds out a tiny Christmas tree to you, his eyes round and shiny. You already know you won't be able to refuse. "Can we get it? Please - my bonsai needs a new friend."

"I think your bonsai would be sad to know their friend is made out of plastic, Joon."

"Well, they wouldn't be sad if they didn't know, right?"

His grin is brimming with mirth. He knows what you're going to say - there was no need to even ask you in the first place because he knew you could never resist his puppy eyes. "Fine," you sigh softly, offering him your sweetest smile. "Make sure Mon doesn't swallow it whole. That dog is a menace."

"He has a restless soul. We'll buy him reindeer ears on our way home."

"Yes!" It elicits giggles from both of you - Namjoon had introduced you to Rapmon just two months into the relationship, claiming you must meet your competition because it's only fair. Frankly, you think the dog himself is competing with your boyfriend - the second you set sight on his silky fur you’ve vowed to never leave his side. Rapmon was an absolute gem. From then on, he was a big part of the events you celebrated together - the main character in your little shenanigans.

Once you've both paid whatever you needed for the day, heaving a ton of shopping bags, you step out of the shop in a fit of giggles. As sophisticated and stern as Namjoon may look, he's quite possibly the clumsiest giant you've ever met. Unfortunately for him, he had accidentally ripped one of the bags you had brought along and as he readied to lift it, all contents came tumbling out as he gawked in terror. Red instantly rushed to his cheeks and you found it hard not to burst out laughing in his face. He wouldn't want to become more flustered than he already felt.

"Every day I wake up to the face of embarrassment," he mumbles ashamedly, shaking his head in dismay. You could only continue to chortle before leaning in to place a tender kiss on his cheek. "It's okay dummy," his cheeks redden even more, "Would some hot chocolate fix your mood?" The second the words slip out of your lips, his face no longer holds a grim expression.

Getting hot chocolate from Pixie’s Magic! is like a tradition between you and Namjoon. Not only was it where you both had met, but it served the most delicious brews you’ve ever tasted. Nothing could possibly beat this little shop in the corner of the mall you were currently in. 

Although it was usually calm and quiet, it seemed to be bustling the day you both go out to buy Christmas decorations. There’s a myriad of people piling up in plan of buying themselves the warmest cup of cocoa - a cup of happiness that would complete their own Christmas. Within that queue of people were families, couples and even people who spend their time alone during the festive season. Pixie’s hot cocoa never failed to brighten days.

You scout through your newly bought items for anything that might pass time. Namjoon stands beside you with his phone in hand, thumb clumsily scrolling through whatever he’d missed from the boys’ usual spam session. “Hoseok’s already got most of his decorations up. Something tells me we’re not winning this so easily.” 

“We’re literally up against Seokjin and Jungkook.” 

He pulls his lips in a taut line - going up against those two was a one way stop to instant loss. Nothing, absolutely nothing could beat either one of them. The competition was and will always be between Seokjin and Jungkook because both were as dense as a brick and would stop at nothing to earn themselves a victory. Frankly, you found it entertaining, even if they were constantly at each other’s throats and threatening to burn each other down - jokingly, of course, you’d never condone violence. Brotherly love if you’ve ever seen it. 

“They’re out of the question. We’re up against the rest, those two idiots can eat an egg.” His bluntness makes you burst into fits of giggles, earning the clear attention of those either ahead of you or waiting (im)patiently behind. Namjoon always had a rather poetic way of saying things. “An egg? You’d be doing them a favour.”

He doesn’t quite realise what you mean until a few seconds later when he breathes out a dejected sigh and massages his temple soothingly. “They’re a whole mess.” 

And he’s right, because when you’re back in the comfort of your humble abode with a warm cup of cocoa waiting for you in the living room, Namjoon’s phone keeps endlessly buzzing. 

“You can’t keep ignoring them forever, you know.”

Namjoon sometimes thinks about how difficult his life would be without you. Go figure that there was no way of avoiding them, right? If you hadn’t told him, he would’ve never guessed so.

The couch sinks underneath his weight as he plants himself beside you, placing a mushy kiss onto your cheek. He’s quick to hand you his beverage once Mon literally hops onto him, wagging his tail like the euphoric little rascal that he is. And there’s peace and quiet, the sound of the crackle of the fireplace, until Namjoon’s thumb slides over the tiny green button making his phone constantly vibrate.

“Namjoon! What took you so long?!”

Seokjin’s voice comes booming out of the device nestled in your boyfriend’s palm. You must admit - it startled you just a bit, but it’s not like you weren’t used to their rambunctious behaviour. “We thought you died. Almost worried us for a while there.”

“Actually,” Jimin so pridefully interrupts, “He was just about ready to forget about you. Don’t act like you didn’t see cloud nine when Tae suggested Joon backed out.” It was all fun and games, affectionate brotherly love between the lot until suddenly, it was a trademarked apocalypse. Truly mind-blowing. 

“You tattletale-!”

“Don’t worry Seokjin,” you snort, “He’s still up and running.” 

“You say that like it’s a bad thing!” Offence washes over Namjoon’s face - perhaps it really is him against the world. Kim Namjoon could trust no one. You could only poke your tongue out at him, earning yourself a blissful smile. “Not at all.”

“Ew. Stop flirting - this isn’t about you, this is about the progress you’re doing.” Seokjin scoffs, making the latter silently giggle to themselves. He has absolutely no filter - nothing could get in the way of the man’s priorities. “Tell that to Yoongi.” His boyfriend was sitting right beside him - and poor him, because Yoongi has to be the strongest man to ever set foot on earth. He’s been dealing with Seokjin’s shit for over a good year or so now. 

“Believe me, I might just knock him out.”

“No way - who’s going to peel your tangerines for work then? Ungrateful imp.” 

Their bickering continues to produce light laughter from the lot of you until you decide it's about time you update each other on your progress. Surprisingly enough, Hoseok was much farther ahead than you all anticipated, and it earned you another fifteen minutes worth of competitive yelling between the youngest and the eldest.

But that was nothing out of the ordinary.

"Move it a little bit to the left," you instructed stringently, hands planted firmly on your hips as your boyfriend does whatever he's told. The tree jiggles with every waking movement, making Namjoon groan at the heavyweight it settles upon him. "Is this alright?" He mumbles tiredly, eyeing you from the depths of its branches.

You could only nibble on your lip, your eyebrows furrowed in thought. "Maybe a bit to the right."

Even when he's exhausted, even when he's sick and tired of turning a piece of mere decoration to countless directions, he doesn't complain. Namjoon wasn't exactly fond of religious festivities, but spending Christmas with you is always something he looks forward to. Setting the deal aside, it was always enjoyable bringing a little life to the house with someone he adores and his heart beats for. "Perfect! Could you grab the baubles? I'll get the ornaments."

Teamwork makes the dream work. An idiom he liked to say on the daily - it always worked between the two of you. Six hours worth of work put into four and the mess that bested every nook and cranny of your house now lessened. You hang the last bauble and sigh in content. "Doesn't it look pretty? I think this is our best one yet."

"Well, technically speaking, I couldn't expect any less from you, bun." His tone of voice resembles that of a young boy in love, his eyes sparkling under the colourful Christmas lights nestled comfortably in the tree's branches as he looks at you with a bashful smile. It's moments like these when you're so caught up in the things you do together, these blissful moments that you realise just how grateful you are for Namjoon. You love him, you love him so much. Nothing could be a better present than spending time with him. He's your bundle of pure euphoria.

"The tree's feeling a little bland, don't you think?"

It takes you a moment to take notice of what he actually meant before you feel extra weight added on top of your head. He teasingly hangs the finishing piece away from you, puckering his lips in hopes he'd earn himself something sweet in return for the star. You could only roll your eyes, but nonetheless, nothing stops you from latching your lips onto his and giving him your love.

Without hesitation, Namjoon scoops you up onto his shoulders, he guides you towards the crest of the tree and watches with bright eyes as you ecstatically plant the finale to the first phase of your decorating. Monnie scratches at the latter's legs in pure joy, barking at you both to signal his presence as well. It elicits laughter, and as Namjoon gently sets you back down, you let your fingers ruffle his fur as he licks at your face.

However, your hours upon hours of decorating doesn't end there, the tinsel messily spread underneath you is a clear indication of this.

With an exhausted huff, you look at Namjoon with hopeful eyes. There's still much to be done.

---

Looks tend to be deceiving when it comes to Kim Namjoon. People tended to deem him as a friendly giant, however, when it came to snowball fights, he was far from that. Like a devil crawling out the pits of hell.

The day you decide to pamper the outdoors of your house, snow starts dribbling from the skies above you. A miracle, because it’s never really snowed so early in December. 

You’re busy setting up mistletoe in front of your front door until you’re barreling forward from the force of something wet on your back. It couldn’t have been Mon - he was sleeping soundlessly inside. But your boyfriend wasn’t - instead, he was childishly running around the front lawn bearing snowballs. 

“Namjoon!” You shriek in utter disbelief, turning around only to face a devious grin. Pure evil dripped from him - Namjoon was no longer the soft bear who insisted you play with his hair. He was now a foe. “You’re going to pay for that!” As quickly as you could, you bear your own weaponry to pay back his foolish actions. 

His giggles echoed across the small space you’re in and before you could even comprehend what was happening, he was already aiming another shot at you. Unfortunately, you were too slow against him. 

Splat!

Three points for Kim Namjoon!

At your absolute suffering, his laughter only gets louder over Mariah Carey’s gorgeous singing coming from inside. “You’ll pay for this, you evil man!” However, your threats are only drowned out by his boisterous laughter. “I’d like to see you try!” 

And you do. Because while he’s busy laughing his ass off at your misery, you earn yourself the rightful chance to aim a snowball right into his face. Three points? You just scored a whole seven. 

He’s baffled - completely, utterly speechless at what’s happened. Well, you definitely weren’t going to stand there and let him conquer victory, he knew that for a fact. He just didn’t think you’d be so blunt. Now you’ve earned him a pink nose. But was he going to let you get away with it? No, Namjoon’s a Virgo. 

He charges towards you like a clumsy child. You almost screech in surprise, instead, busting out in fits of laughter as you tumble and trip away from him. “Hey-! Get back here!” He cries out, almost face-planting into a hefty pile of snow. That would’ve been outright hilarious. 

“Just try and catch me, big man!”

It’s light-hearted, it’s all lively and pleasant. You were both adults, but nothing stopped you from feeding into the fruits of life and feeling youthful sometimes. You both did it for the hell of it because you knew that with each other, you could be anything. 

You’re too busy laughing to actually take notice of where your feet were taking you, feigning into the mess beneath you and tripping in your own feet. A loud thud leaves your descent, and with that, your boyfriend tumbling down on top of you because he was too clumsy for his own good. It was cute, really. Namjoon lets out a terrified shriek, his arms landing just beside your head - luckily because you’re pretty sure you would’ve earned yourself a long-surviving black-eye. 

“Got you,” he says rather flusteredly. There’s a hint of panic in his eyes that almost seems as if he’s seen God himself. Had the fall really taken the piss out of him? 

“No,” you state, shaking your head as best as you can. “Technically speaking, I got you.” You place a quick kiss on his pretty pink nose just for good measure, because in truth, you really did get him. He was on three points while you were on a steady seven. Namjoon pulls his lips in a taut line ever so shyly, hiding the growing smile planting itself on his face. No longer was he your arch-nemesis - your boyfriend was back to being your friendly neighbourhood giant. “Shouldn’t we get back to decorating? I thought you wanted to beat the others.” Perhaps it slipped through his mind because the second those words slip through yours, he’s already hoisting himself up and pulling you along with him. Kim Namjoon does not give up in the face of competition, that much is clear, even when he’d previously been working off a snowball fight.

“I couldn’t help myself!” He defends nonetheless, his palm scratching shyly at his mess of a mane. “But now that I think about it, we can have as many snowball fights as we want when we kick ass. A win-win situation, if I do say so myself.”

A win-win situation indeed. 

When the boys call later on in the evening, it becomes clear that Namjoon was second in lead - Jimin taking first place. While the rest were busy taking things easily, he’d effortlessly managed to get things done in only a short matter of time. He definitely wasn’t there to play. 

“No way. You’re cheating!” Taehyung accuses, astonishment evident from the little you could see of his face. His lighting was absolute crap. Despite his belief, Jimin easily shakes off his accusation with a mischievous grin. “I don’t know Taehyung, maybe if you hadn’t been slacking off at Taco Bell you would’ve been catching up.” 

“Wha-! What a heathen - I’d choose Taco Bell over this any day!”

“How dare you! This is Christmas decorating you red-headed scoundrel!”

“This isn’t about you Seokjin!”

“Might as well be,” Yoongi mumbles from beside him, lazily scrolling through his phone as a yawn escapes his lips. You might just think he’s aged by a couple of years because of this ordeal. “You’re all complete losers,” Jungkook comments, face completely mushed against his phone as he nibbles on whatever was in front of him. The kid feared absolutely nothing - the wrath of a butthurt Kim Seokjin wasn’t any different.

Namjoon squints at his phone. He clearly wasn’t wearing his glasses, nor his contact lenses, and you knew he’d face the consequences later on. You’ve spent countless days by his side tending to his colossal headache. “Are you… Are you eating raw pop tarts?”

“Yes.”

“Raw. Aren’t you supposed to toast them?” There’s confusion laced in his tone, and in between, intense fear. “That’s like, a felony.”

Jungkook lets out a scandalised gasp. “No way! I’m not letting this piece of divine heaven be tainted by modern technology! I don’t even have a toaster, and there’s no way in hell I’m touching the microwave.”

Hoseok snickers. “He thinks it’s going to explode.”

“Don’t test me! I know the evil that sits within that thing.” 

As complex at it was, you’ve come to the conclusion that there’s no explaining what these men are made out of. They’re simply built differently. In fact, you’ve grown out of trying to comprehend them, because you could be on your death-bed and they’d still be saying and doing things that would make you sigh and shake your head. 

---

Alas, the day has come, and so have the boys, who just wouldn’t stop rambunctiously banging on your door. You’re busy setting up the table, Mon at your feet wagging his tail excitedly. “Namjoon!” You call out, balancing a few plates on the palms of your hands. “Namjoon! Could you get the door?”

However, as much as you yell, Namjoon doesn’t respond. You suppose it’s because he hasn’t come back from wherever he had gone earlier during the day. Odd. 

Nonetheless, you set a few plates down on the dining table, hurriedly skipping over to your front door only to be trampled by none other than your special guests for the night. “Finally!” A rather over-dramatic Seokjin sighs, patting away the invisible sweat dripping down his forehead. “Waiting for you to open was like running a marathon. I swear!” 

You could only laugh as Jimin pulls you in for an embrace - it was in his habits to do so whenever he saw you. It’s not as if you mind, his hugs were by far the best you’ve felt. They were full of love and warmth, something that perfectly describes the man himself. “Don’t mind him,” he tells you, rolling his eyes at the dramatics his friend was making. “He really needed to piss.” 

“Sorry for taking so long - Namjoon hasn’t gotten back home from this morning.” 

“He hasn’t?” Yoongi neatly sets his shoes by the door, unwrapping a thick scarf from his neck, dangling it on your coat hanger. “That’s pretty unusual, he doesn’t like being out in cold weather.” 

“He probably got into some traffic,” you assume, “Hopefully he’ll be back soon. Until then, make yourselves at home. We’ll order take-out soon!”

All of you were like a proper family when it came to celebrating Christmas. Each year, sleepovers are taken in turns going from eldest to youngest. This year just so happens to be Namjoon’s turn - it’s not as if you mind, the house seems more lively when they’re around. They had that thing about them, that wherever they went they tended to make things brighter. Not once have you felt gloomy or perhaps left out. The seven of them all had qualities in contrast to one another, all showing you different ways of happiness. You’re lucky to say you have them in your life.

The wait for Namjoon continues. You all settle with playing board games, for the time being, the living room turning into a whole battleground because Yoongi can’t go by without cheating once in a while. He was really cunning, you could see Taehyung trying to pick up on his tricks. 

“Uno!” Jimin yells, shoving a proud middle finger in Seokjin’s face. The man could faint from the amount of disrespect he was receiving. “Try beating that, old man.” 

“I’ll tell you I’m more than an old man! I want a rematch. You’re all cheats, all of you.”

“You’re just a sore loser.” Jungkook was on thin ice. His nitpicking on Seokjin was getting him nowhere but pure, utter hell while he was sleeping. You admire his courage - he was fucking insane. “Sore losers don’t win, old man.” 

Seokjin almost gets up to throttle him for his constant bullying when the door swings open and you’re all met by layers upon layers of clothing stomping inside. He’s carrying a bunch of bags you can’t seem to decipher, and you could see his nose poking out from his scarf. 

Finally, Namjoon’s back home. 

“Hey __, I’m back. I’m sorry I took so-” 

“Joon, you idiot!” Before you could even bat an eye, Taehyung and Hoseok were on the man like hungry beasts. He was already eaten up by whatever garments he was wearing, the only pieces missing were the duo for him to finally disappear. “What took you so long? We were worried sick! Jimin can’t DJ for the life of him.” 

“Hey-!”

You hoist yourself up and dust off whatever remnants of gingerbread cookies were left on you. All the concern that had been building up over time of Namjoon not being home had now diminished. Sudden relief washes over you because you hadn’t really noticed how worried sick you’ve been until he’d stepped into the house. Namjoon can be really impulsive sometimes. 

“Joon,” He wraps his arms around your smaller figure and places a gentle kiss on your forehead. “Where have you been? Had me really worried for a second there.”

There’s this cheeky look in his face that makes you swoon. He’s so lovely, in all his ways, you just can’t help but be filled with so much love. You love him. 

“I kind of… I kind of forgot to pick your present up. Sorry - Didn’t want to worry you, just a clumsy move.” 

He’s all you’ve ever imagined. 

“Get over here you two - we’re ordering take-out!” Your little moment is easily interrupted by the guys hollering you over, to which you oblige because you wouldn’t want to waste another second. You could hear Namjoon’s stomach grumbling a bit. “Have I been out for that long?” He queries, looking at you with a raised eyebrow. “Dummy, it’s six in the afternoon. It’s already dark.” 

“Well, I’m finally back home now, right where I need to be.” 

You don’t notice it, but there’s a little mistletoe just above your heads. And Namjoon knows this because he points up towards it with mirth laced in his pretty eyes and a pretty smile. “Merry Christmas,” he tells you before he leans in and gives you what you rightfully deserve.

[punkscowardschampions]

Janis & Jimmy

Janis: [So, the night before this friendmas, which is probably the next day from the nativity moment, like this is the first day of the holiday vibe] Janis: We're still on for their friendmas bullshit? Jimmy: can't 😭 off Janis: It's still worth it Janis: for the amount of damage that can be done in one sitting Jimmy: it were my 🥇💡 don't need telling Janis: Checking you were still up for it Janis: and we have to make the food to bring Jimmy: 👍 Janis: Helpful as that is, what do you want to make and where do you want to make it? Jimmy: Where are you? Janis: my grandparents Jimmy: nearer yours or mine? Janis: yours Janis: mine is near nothing Jimmy: come here then Janis: alright Janis: just trying to think of ways to sneak calories into shit without pouring butter onto a salad Jimmy: look up thanksgiving recipes, they're known for that bollocks Janis: okay Janis: and you'll be...? Jimmy: cleaning my kitchen, that alright with you? Janis: Fine Jimmy: 👌 Janis: My sister thinks Mia might invite her boyfriend Jimmy: 💰 on him not showing up Janis: What I said Janis: in case he does though Janis: she was useless with any other info Jimmy: 💔 her and this group chat Jimmy: not actually that bothered what Asia might wear Janis: 🙄 Janis: how much freedom is there with a fucking jumper Janis: she said they don't eat fuck all sustaining but no shit there, hence the plan Jimmy: [sends her a pic I saw of a real jumper that has the tit cut out and like a red reindeer nose over the person's nip or something I can't remember] Janis: Oh Janis: 🤢🤢🤢 Janis: distract from the teeth but nah Jimmy: Dunno who's got her for the 🎁 giving but 🤞 for invisalign Janis: budget kit that ain't dentist-approved I saw on insta Janis: 🤞 it'll fuck her up harder Jimmy: all teeth to no teeth Janis: fit in with 💀👑 and 💀#2 Jimmy: mash 🥔 or 🍠 it is Janis: 🍠 is too vom-inducing as is Janis: hide 💊s in it like 👶🐶 Jimmy: is that marshmallow thing bollocks or what? Janis: nah, that's legit Janis: we could do that Janis: cultural Jimmy: 🤢 Janis: you can cover everyone's plates in gravy Janis: not a euphemism Janis: #northern Jimmy: I'd have a job if you were expecting the euphemism Janis: you're alright Janis: amusing, but suspicious when I'm not touching my plate Jimmy: very trusting of you to crack on with any of it as is Janis: I doubt they're wasting laxatives on me Janis: skinny enough Janis: it'll just be gross Jimmy: weren't where my 🧠 went but alright Janis: ? Janis: oh, very Agatha Christie Janis: not gonna kill themselves to kill me, I'll watch the plates and serving up Jimmy: nowt rich lasses won't monogram, theirs'll be safe and sound Janis: what about yours? Janis: you might get roofied Jimmy: take my chances downing the gravy, too northern for owt else, you said it Janis: that'll be nice Jimmy: 😍 obvs Janis: I meant for me when I inevitably have to 💋 you Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Janis: it's at #2s Janis: odds on a 👑 shrine somewhere? Jimmy: near her 🛏 Janis: under it when she's about Janis: in it when she ain't 💔 Jimmy: we don't have to sleep there in a bit, do we? Janis: oh bollocks Janis: I'm sure we can get out of it, as we technically were not invited Janis: pretty sure they do a sleepover too though Janis: any excuse Jimmy: 🙄 Janis: I know Jimmy: I'm going down the shop, what bollocks do we need? Janis: [a list I'm not committing you to but we know the vibe] Janis: I've already got [shit we're stealing soz mcvickers] Jimmy: alright Jimmy: if you get here before I'm back, my sister'll let you in Janis: did she come to the nativity with yous? Jimmy: dragged kicking and marding, weren't that what I said? Janis: right Janis: apologies for doubting you Jimmy: tah Janis: what about the kid? Jimmy: what about him? Janis: where'd he end up on the scale Jimmy: we don't have a scale for him Janis: 😭 to 😁 Jimmy: near ☹️ Janis: no tears, at least Jimmy: can sign what we like without being those dickheads shouting out 🦻 perks Janis: that is useful Jimmy: and the 🐕's got somewhere new to sleep an' all Jimmy: 🏆 Janis: totally worth the money we didn't spend then Janis: can have these jumpers too after Jimmy: ain't yours itchy? Janis: feels like I'm wearing a barbershop floor Janis: but I didn't reckon your dog would be that fussy Jimmy: meant to be your specialist subject Janis: like ☕ is yours? Janis: not my passion, it's easy money Jimmy: there ain't much to know about ☕ don't need passion Janis: 🤫 Janis: you 💘 every bean Jimmy: it's only 💕 for your sister and her mates Janis: anything but getting a personality Janis: I know Jimmy: gotta put something in their bio Janis: 'IM AN EMPTY VESSEL' comes off desperate, even on tinder Jimmy: as 🤰 pact's go Janis: don't even Jimmy: very festive Janis: messiahs aren't being popped out 5 at a time Jimmy: they'd never be satisfied with 3 🎁s any road Jimmy: full baby shower or nowt Janis: yeah Janis: no doubt Grace will be torturing me with as much any time soon Jimmy: 🍾🍾🍾 Janis: 🔨🔨🔨 Jimmy: 👶👶👶👶👶 Janis: have to smash the poor bastards and all Janis: not worth thinking about Jimmy: ⚰️⚰️⚰️⚰️⚰️ Janis: yeah funerals are much better craic Janis: have as many of them as she likes Jimmy: matching the shades of black'll do her head in Janis: 🤞 Janis: the breakdown will give her a personality Janis: got there in the end, babes Jimmy: @ me Jimmy: be on the edge of my seat waiting to find out Janis: if your details don't get lost when you change back to your real identity Jimmy: 💔 I can't be @ing you on the off chance, be coming off as desperate an' all, me Janis: doubt she'll be so bombastic herself she'll turn down a DM request Janis: have a go, like Janis: dare to 💭 Jimmy: just pop in using my 👻 form, can't I? Jimmy: keep it between us Janis: my lips are sealed Janis: how you use your afterlife is your business Jimmy: got nowt else on Janis: optimistic Janis: you might be moving to 🥳 central Jimmy: Go on, where's that? Janis: Ian in the know, not me Jimmy: dare to 💭 Janet Janis: I don't care where I end up Janis: just not here is fine Jimmy: weren't talking about you, big head Janis: Not too fussed where you end up either Janis: not gonna lie Jimmy: What did you bring it up for then? Janis: You're moving Janis: you said Jimmy: and? Jimmy: 🥳 central were what you said, not me Janis: I don't know what you're getting at Jimmy: if you're not bothered, what are you getting at? Jimmy: no need to 🗨 bollocks were something else you said Janis: I was just messing about, both statements Janis: I didn't know everything I 🗨 had to be deadly serious Jimmy: I didn't know there were 1 rule for you and another for me Janis: it's a bit different from you calling me a slag but fine Janis: you've made your point Jimmy: nah, the point were that I were never calling you a slag Janis: you were joking, okay Jimmy: but go on and take it to your ⚰ Janis: I'm trying to have a normal conversation with you right now and you're the one being moody Jimmy: you're the one who said we don't need to have a conversation Janis: well we clearly do when we have shit to do Jimmy: we've sorted the 🍽 Janis: right, so tell me to piss off then Jimmy: and have to piss about cooking on my own? You're alright Jimmy: nowt like the threat of a good time, that Janis: then what Jimmy: then come here Janis: [do that] Jimmy: [this won't be awkward at all] Janis: [the tension and the kids are home so that'll not be remotely getting dealt with] Jimmy: [cos I'm evil like that hahaha, we're gonna both be so extra at friendmas, love it] Janis: [it also makes sense like if school is out now where you gonna be hens, truly idk what you're gonna say though girl] Jimmy: [like you could've hooked up on the trampoline but you would probably freeze to death and also Twix wouldn't allow it soz lads] Janis: [not on my watch Twix says, at least you can focus on making this side dish the weirdest most calorific moment] Jimmy: [having fun in spite of yourselves as per] Janis: [I want you to apologize but also not but that is difficile hmm, probably later if you get vaguely tipsy at this event] Jimmy: [and get swept away by the emoshness of fake gifting] Janis: [we know there will be plenty of time for moments abound then] Jimmy: [you'll be bored rigid otherwise] Janis: [mhmm and this is far from over hunnies] Jimmy: [whatever you do don't let Twix eat that while you're shamelessly distracted acting like it's all nbd] Janis: [or the kids lmao lowkey gotta hide this monstrosity when you're done] Jimmy: [hide it when you go 🚬 boy because we're stressed by the fact that whenever we try to have fun rn we then remember she said it was a mistake] Janis: [oh this misunderstanding, 'cos we only said it 'cos we thought that's what he was saying basically, lordy, also hate being left in his house like excuse me do I go now or] Jimmy: [what a time to wish you weren't alive] Janis: [coming out 'cos fuck just waiting or leaving, 'is there anything else we need to do?'] Jimmy: [automatically passes her a  🚬 because that bitch] Janis: [takes it like true, can't hurt] Jimmy: ['what time's the last bus?' cos he's assuming she's going home and that she's probably missed it] Janis: [shakes head 'I'll stay at my grandparents, no need to go home now'] Jimmy: [a look around like alright where's that because the ankle is still a thing and we're still worried about it] Janis: [a genuine oh-you kinda smile 'cos honestly 'literally a couple of streets from here, actually] Jimmy: [nods like okay, we'll go when you're ready cos obvs he's walking her whether she likes it or not] Janis: ['don't need an early night for friendmas, do we' like excuse you, I might have plans] Jimmy: [shrugs 'bit of a ball ache to get the chains of the bed and bring 'em with'] Janis: [😏'you could have a night off'] Jimmy: [makes a point of putting her leg on him to rest and elevate that ankle like no I cannot] Janis: [just looks at it and sighs 'I can't not walk, there's shit to do'] Jimmy: [just looks at her and you know they haven't made eye contact this whole time SO THERE'S THAT 'I know it hurts' in a soft way] Janis: [we gotta look away 'cos byeeeeee, shrugging and mumbling like 'it was just a stupid accident, I'm fine'] Jimmy: [nudging her, not hard obvs like 1. look at me and 2. don't be shrugging at me rn and shaking his head 'a stupid accident that were my fault' like LET ME HELP YOU!!] Janis: [shaking her head for all the reasons and then blurting out 'I'm embarrassed!' then being even more so like ffs] Jimmy: [cupping her little face in his hands the gentlest EVER 'what for?' because she literally has nothing to be embarrassed about] Janis: [looking at him like where do I start lol 'cos this has been so fast and so messy, not to mention the fact you now wanna kiss him and that's one of the things you think you need to be embarrassed over 'I don't need help, that's not- I'm not used to that'] Jimmy: ['it's alright' spoken like it'll be true if he just says it soft and with enough feeling, but then obvs we gotta recover ourselves a bit because vulnerability who is she 'I only were offering to take all them dogs out for a piss for you, not a kidney' but we're still not giving it full pisstake in how we're saying that or being] Janis: [pushing him but gently too, because likewise trying to get back to this more pisstakey energy without going too hard too fast 'not my fault you're like top nurse without even trying then' 'cos you're doing and have done way more than that, we know boy] Jimmy: [lowkey 😳 but we're hiding it with 😏 and the wintery darkness as we nudge her back but turn it into a feelsy lean for a while then giving her his phone like put that dog walking schedule in there girl I mean it] Janis: ['I ain't gonna be able to take your CG shifts, like' and mimes murdering all the customers in various ways but we do lean back too, even if momentarily 'you could meet me for the ones you can and do the hard work, and I'll sit on the bench, yeah?' and puts hand out like deal?] Jimmy: [does a 💔 mime because we would love to see that murder spree but obvs shaking on that legit suggestion with a legit little smile cos we're chuffed she's actually accepting a hand in any way] Janis: ['I can do more hard work with the plan' like all the socials whilst I sit there honey and mimes taking creep shots of him] Jimmy: [OTT 😍 to hide the realness, then he remembers that speaking of, he obvs won't have done a doodle for her today so gesture for her to stay put while we run and get a pen and paper right now immediately but as we're going we turn back like oh! again 'do you want the bag  peas chucked back for a bit?'] Janis: [going to shake our head automatically but then checking ourself like oop 'might freeze to my skin out here, like' shrugs 'but go ahead'] Jimmy: [does bring a blanket with all the other shit because we just wanna be out here away from kids and dogs soz] Janis: [day #1 of this hol and we're done lmao, little kids do be feral when it's this close to xmas, even good ones like bobby] Jimmy: [yeah and don't even start me on how all the pressure for having a good christmas is on him because Ian isn't that bitch and Cass is highkey hoping their mum will appear even though they've moved and that ain't happening babe soz] Janis: [mHMM thank god Ian is a buy your love type so he will get them presents, it's just the rest] Jimmy: [what are you doodling today boy, obvs some kind of domestic af cooking moment but no #spoilers gals] Janis: [just get snuggled in these blankets and make sure he is too] Jimmy: [can't and won't stop the happy sigh because we've been so stressed] Janis: [some joke about art being his 💘 but we're glad obvs] Jimmy: [🙄 but 😏] Janis: [tryna peep at what he is drawing though, obvs x2] Jimmy: [will playfully get you with this pen like oi] Janis: [offended like where's my pen 'play fair' accidentally saucy] Jimmy: [we know he'll give you that pen and just write on you/tickle you in his fave manner, drawing a 🏆 like we're playing to win not fairly hen] Janis: [just loling like get off 'cos ticklish af 'we're meant to be a team, dickhead' and draws her own 🏆 with 'worst sport' in the plaque thing] Jimmy: [draws the JJ 💘 really big and deliberate to really tickle and also make a point like okay] Janis: [a question mark when we've stopped squirming like do you really get it though, also a throwback] Jimmy: [a LOOK like do you] Janis: [just nods and gives the pen back like okay, finish your drawing] Jimmy: [does and again signs it like a big nerd before giving it to her] Janis: [we love it hun but we never know what to say 'tah for not giving away the poison plot in your art like an idiot' and putting it away to photo later in an indoor light moment] Jimmy: [a noise like not an amateur tah and going to make tea because 1.northern 2. it's cold 3. he doesn't know what to say/is awks about his art too] Janis: you're in the wrong profession Jimmy: ? Janis: 1. artiste 2. only old ladies order pots of tea, yeah? Jimmy: 1. why be starving when there's loads of 🍪🥐🥪🍰 going at the job I've got 2. bit sexist to the 👴 Janis: 1. 🐷 2. tell me they ain't always with their 👵 Jimmy: 1. Only 💕🐕's you, I get it 💔🦝🗑 2. sounds fake, so obvs I'll 🗨 it to you, mate Janis: 🙄🙄 Jimmy: miss you an' all Janis: You could see me from there if you really wanted Jimmy: [peeps from the kitchen window like hey] Janis: [waving like oh hey you fool] Jimmy: [signs something feelsy because she won't understand it we're safe] Janis: [big ? in the air} Jimmy: [just loling like nope as we mime confusion like idk what you mean or want rn soz because we're taking that to our grave] Janis: [shouting 'bring me my fucking tea' manners and decorum] Jimmy: [does and a box of some kind of festive biscuit selection that the children have already got at so there's only shit ones left lowkey but still] Janis: ['you know how to treat a girl' when we're saying it like we're joking but not really lmao] Jimmy: [shove a biscuit in your mouth boy so you don't say anything you wish you hadn't and also because we're making a bants point like yeah so romantic me] Janis: [wipe the crumbs from his bottom lip like he did 'oi, I've had an idea' softer than that oi suggests, we're not shouting now lol] Jimmy: [shamelessly looking at her lips once she's touched his like is that your idea, focus please sir 'go on'] Janis: [failing to pretend we didn't notice that but still carry on tah 'well #2 and every fucker on her street is gonna have excessive lights and decorations about, what do you reckon to shrinking their energy bill? if we go out when they're asleep, they'll not notice, and we could get back here and do your house before your brother and sister wake up' like how magical even you will love it don't lie cass] Jimmy: [when you can't help genuinely grinning because that's such a good idea we're falling in love rn okay like he's gonna have felt so bad about not having the time, money or energy to decorate, gotta recover ourselves again quick so does an IRL 🤞 'all her pink glittery baubles'll really get Ian in the christmas spirit' but really we're not thinking about him and it'll look epic Janis: [grin back 'cos it's infectious ''cos no way am I sleeping in a room with that lot in' and shrug like, we may as well, as if you remotely had to suggest anything of the sort] Jimmy: ['give us nightmares if all them calories don't' never miss a opportunity to shade the flatwhites honey] Janis: ['I can protect you from them, but not the calories, I'm so sorry' 😏] Jimmy: [eats another biscuit like I reckon I'll live] Janis: [an impression of a Mia shade face like you fat bitch] Jimmy: [an impression of Ella being 😭💔 DEVASTATED] Janis: [snatching the tin like no more for you, and getting one all smug like delicious] Jimmy: [OTT Jimothy pout because always] Janis: [flippant 'deal with it, babes' 'cos mustn't linger LOOKING at him again] Jimmy: [cringing in a way that is OTT but not that fake because she's too good at these impressions and chucking the blanket over her head like begone] Janis: [had enough years of this hoe being present to be an expert, just pulling the blanket down and around our shoulders like ha ha more for me, but gesturing that he should move closer and get under to keep warm too] Jimmy: [does because any excuse to snuggle and likewise play with her hair like it's so in my way rn lemme just] Janis: [hence I got you the present I did honey heheheh, know we're likewise here for this] Jimmy: [just having a moment ™] Janis: [one of the kids should need you or Twix should start wildin' soz boys] Jimmy: [yeah realistically it could be time for Bobby to go to bed depending what time she came over/he could have woken up] Janis: [either way honey, you better skeddale so he can sort this] Jimmy: [we know you're both fuming but especially him because he was gonna carry you to mcvickers gaff] Janis: [soz boy, you can be the most tomorrow though] Jimmy: [we both know he will LOL] Jimmy: [also gonna say he opens up at the CG because putting in a quick shift and doing any dog walking he can for the bae all before this friendmas has even started is just the difference between him and the gals, with the exception of Grace] Janis: [wig tea sis] Jimmy: [tired before you even get there] Janis: [we are that sick of y'all so it's a mood, frankly, but for now] Janis: night Jimmy: Oi Jimmy: you better be hopping back, dickhead Janis: [video of her hopping like don't fall] Jimmy: 🥇🏆💪 you Jimmy: 🦩 goals if nowt else Janis: 🤔 not not a compliment Janis: I'll take it Jimmy: the first bit were Janis: True Janis: pretend I didn't see the rest Jimmy: 🙈🙈🙈 Janis: I've learnt my lesson with blindfolds, tah Jimmy: 💔 Jimmy: and here's me with no chance to find out if sir's gonna be more receptive to my kinks Janis: find out if he's alright with broken bones Janis: gonna say unlikely, he flipped his shit over some cut ties Jimmy: @ something about virgin school girls Janis: mhmm Janis: he'd much rather injure you than the other way 'round Janis: it's alright, maybe tomorrow Janis: don't need to be blinded by the decor tbh Jimmy: should've got you a onesie to zip over your head, up for that challenge, massive though it is Janis: oh yeah, the gimp range Janis: 🙄 Janis: you have to pretend to be pleased to see my beautiful face, remember Jimmy: tah for the reminder, would've forgot and done full Home Alone 😱 Janis: yeah, you're about as annoying as that little fucker Janis: tracks Jimmy: rude Jimmy: you'd be chuffed if I had his house Janis: what for? Janis: so I could get you tenants and take the cash? Jimmy: 'cause what's fake mine is fake yours Jimmy: and you must have a bigger 🧠 in that MASSIVE head than the robbers he had to see off Janis: if I was worried about that, I'd let Mia make the moves she wants to Jimmy: so ominous, that Janis: 💋 not 💀 Jimmy: I'd rather 💀💀💀 Jimmy: but you crack on Janis: that's why I said IF I gave a fuck Jimmy: if as massive as her 😍 for her daddy, I get it Janis: thank god it's at Ella's Janis: wouldn't be getting away from hers unmolested Jimmy: can't move for mistletoe, I bet Janis: Baby, it's cold outside Janis: 😈 Jimmy: What IS in that drink? 😏 Janis: me checking yours tomorrow so they don't do my job for me Jimmy: Bill's 👻'll only let us have owt off each other's lips, it'll take fucking ages to 💀💀💀 Janis: you're just an actor on his stage and a player in his 🌍 Janis: have to suck it up and deal with the torture Jimmy: 👍 Janis: No enthusiasm needed 'til tomorrow Janis: 👋 then Jimmy: don't need an early night, you said Janis: your brother seemed like he did though Janis: not trying to get in the way of that top brother 🏆 Jimmy: 🍪 sugar crash did him before us Janis: fair Janis: feeling it and all Janis: still buzzing though Jimmy: yeah? Janis: 😵 🥴 🤢 🤮 scale Janis: I'm solidly 🥴 Jimmy: lightweight Janis: I don't work in a cafe Jimmy: and what? Janis: 🍪🥐🥪🍰 Jimmy: never pull your weight, you Janis: just 'cos you eat yours in baked goods Janis: one of us has to be 💪 Jimmy: hang on, who's been carrying who? Janis: I would carry you Janis: you monopolized it by crippling me Jimmy: convenient excuse that Janis: okay, you aren't 💀👑 daddy don't try it Jimmy: 🎻💔😭 Jimmy: rudest bollocks you've ever said to me Jimmy: how dare you TBH Janis: come back when you've got your law degree and fathered a demon Janis: then we'll talk Jimmy: I'll chuck 'em both at your window, Juliet 📜👶 Janis: 😍 Janis: just don't break it Janis: my window, that is Jimmy: any 👶 of mine's gonna be a right fat bastard, nowt I can do about that, soz Janis: soft landing Janis: all's well that ends well Jimmy: do what you like with the broken glass, so crafty, you Janis: depends if you're gonna come in Janis: obviously Jimmy: it's how it's written Janis: ? Jimmy: I get your attention, you give me it Jimmy: hang your head out or Bill will be fuming Janis: unfortunately there ain't no pool under my window Janis: but that's probably not an original feature of the play Janis: just an excuse to see Leo all bedraggled Jimmy: get him wet to do the same for all the lasses 👀🍿 Janis: poetic Jimmy: IKR Jimmy: 🥇 or nowt baby Janis: Shame it's not festive or I'd suggest it Jimmy: fucking hell, if they're gonna force us to watch Elf, sod the plan, I'll 💀💀💀 myself Jimmy: another poem for you Janis: 1. hot 2. I refuse, think it's gotta be illegal to force us to watch it, it's in the geneva convention, yeah? I'll ask daddy Jimmy: @ him Janis: @litigationandtitilation Jimmy: 😂 Janis: she helped him come up with it Jimmy: DUH, nowt they don't do together Janis: 💕 Janis: dead jealous Jimmy: me an' all Janis: we'll all get to bond over our daddy issues Janis: can't wait Jimmy: #realgoals Janis: obviously Janis: I ain't got them any gifts, have you? Jimmy: I'm working, I'll bring 'em a latte Jimmy: menu full of 🎄 bollocks they ain't bothered to work through yet Janis: how disappointing they'll literally be thrilled Janis: too 😍 to handle, you Jimmy: you gonna meet me there or what? Janis: 🤔 Janis: probably the most #goals if we arrive together Janis: and fuck knows how far they can see from her tower Janis: I could come to your work Janis: pick you and the lattes up 💪🏆 Jimmy: alright Janis: 👌 Janis: just lemme know when you're finishing up then Jimmy: I'll make you something that ain't poisoned Janis: that a threat? Jimmy: more #goals to call it a romantic gesture Janis: 'course Jimmy: get your head in the game, girl Janis: it is Janis: just working out if there's any ways we can fuck it up before even arriving Jimmy: what, like get 💀👑 hopes up and then piss on them even harder? Janis: yeah, like that Janis: or get all the rest on our side, somehow Janis: that'd fuck her off no end Jimmy: so go on, what would it take? Jimmy: other than 💀#2 there's no challenge in it Jimmy: piss easy it were to get Asia to invite us Janis: you're probably more of an expert than me then Janis: like, we've got to make it actually a decent time, the kinda party they wanna have Janis: instead of what 📸s well Janis: and what Mia allows Janis: but we can't just fully steamroll in and be blatant about it Janis: or 💀👑 & 💀#2 would pull ranks Jimmy: what kind of party do they wanna have? Janis: they never look like they're having fun Janis: they're dead in the eyes Janis: even if it ain't my exact idea of, sure we can come up with better, right? Jimmy: easy when we put our massive heads together Janis: Asia is the easiest, we could basically ask her and she'd tell us without clocking Jimmy: hang on then Jimmy: Grace were #livingherbestlife when she punched you with a beauty blender, I'll let her 💄💅 me if it pushes 💀👑 off the scale Janis: I'm sure that's just pent-up anger issues Janis: but maybe you've messed up her order one too many times 🔪🔪 Jimmy: deliberately Jimmy: my only joy, that Janis: 😂 Janis: might have a tiny bit of respect for you now Jimmy: 🤏 Janis: pretend to be her boyfriend for a change and you can do one of those tag videos Jimmy: you're alright, my CV'll survive without that oscar Janis: 😏 Janis: fair Janis: don't need the rumours Jimmy: if she wants footage, WE'LL get her some, as a team, dickhead Janis: she will be 📽 Janis: so alright Jimmy: always ready for a close up, me Jimmy: and you do alright keeping up an' all Janis: wait 'til I ain't hopping, like Jimmy: that's her, what does the big one want? Janis: you haven't 👀 her about doing this weird dances? Jimmy: steady on, she WEREN'T having seizures? Janis: yeah, I know Janis: it's shocking Jimmy: you'll fuck your other ankle, I ain't having that Janis: you volunteer then? Jimmy: there's gotta be something else they do on that app Janis: are you interested in miming the lyrics to a shitty dance song? Jimmy: POV: your 👻 fake boyfriend Janis: you can go for that oscar Janis: I hope she doesn't try to be funny, or if she does, then I need to watch all her content rn Janis: welcome for the view Jimmy: might win 💀👑 over with the one where I play her dad Janis: 💀💀💀💀💀 Jimmy: or better yet 💀#2 when I have a go at 💀👑 Janis: the plan isn't you seduce everyone Janis: friends not 💦💦 boy Jimmy: it's a fucked plan then Jimmy: 💔💔💔 Janis: you're that insatiable or irresistible? Jimmy: I'll be that itchy Jimmy: jumper's coming off any road Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: *😍 Janis: I'll bring it tomorrow, babe Jimmy: UGH FINE Janis: put your tits away Janis: honestly Jimmy: SO jealous, you Janis: Ha Janis: SO original, you Jimmy: your tits can have 🥈 Joanne, nowt wrong with them or that Janis: Piss off Janis: 💀👑 tell you it don't count if it's just fat Jimmy: 😱😱😱 OMFG! 😱😱😱 Jimmy: should've said you wanted to get her hopes up with a fake breakup Janis: would be well triggering, no doubt Janis: only talk to argue, her lot, you can tell Jimmy: #relatable Jimmy: gonna have to 💀💀💀 myself now Jimmy: been nice fake knowing you, my dear Janis: oh no you don't Janis: not being a fake widow Janis: can't pretend to be that 💔💔💔 for the rest of my life Jimmy: @iantaylor8 with your 💔😭🎻 Jimmy: can't have owt in common with that lot for a day in my life, tah Janis: I'll feel sorry for you when you're fucking twins with one of them Jimmy: So you want my pity? Don't sound like you but alright Janis: nah, just won't be giving you no 🤗 and 😘 Jimmy: What then? What's my 🎁? Janis: 🕞👀 Jimmy: Come on, I'll fake the surprise Janis: don't get too excited Janis: I haven't nicked you no 💎 Jimmy: bit rude but that's probably my fault for not sitting on your lap and telling you what I want Janis: not too late Janis: see what her ma has lying about Janis: but yeah, if you'd have been more prepared, maybe I woulda been too Jimmy: just the odd 💍👑💼💰 or 🐴 nbd Janis: you're demanding now but you've missed your chance Janis: gutted Jimmy: not too late, you said Janis: you might get A 💎 Janis: can't do the full list now Jimmy: [pouty face 🥺 selfie, we're coming for your life Savannah, soz] Janis: what's in it for me if you ain't gonna sit on my lap? 🎅 Jimmy: never said I wouldn't Janis: 🔊 is cheap Janis: 🐴 are expensive Jimmy: what were it you said, tomorrow, babe Jimmy: giving someone a bell to install a pool or a balcony as I 🗨'd expensive an' all Janis: I've got patience to 🕞👀 Jimmy: good Jimmy: we're just that starcrossed, girl, nowt to be done about it Janis: or lots to do Janis: depending on your point of view Jimmy: lots of 🕞👀 'cause that's your #kink Janis: must be Jimmy: and mine's doing owt for you 💕 Janis: what more could I ask for Janis: ❌🎅 Jimmy: what more do you want? Janis: 🤔 Jimmy: ? Janis: ? Jimmy: ⏲ Janis: You can surprise me Jimmy: alright Janis: is it? Jimmy: isn't it? Janis: alright, alright Jimmy: 🤞 Janis: it'll be good Janis: tomorrow Jimmy: 🥇 Janis: [picture to prove you are at mcvickers] Jimmy: [a picture back of Bobby and Twix snoozing all over you] Janis: looks cozy Jimmy: *uncomfortable Jimmy: speaking of, I'll bring you the 👑 back tomorrow, you can chuck it on instead of a cracker hat Janis: Bless Janis: 🤞 there's no one sleeping in my bed Janis: 💡💡 Jimmy: 🐻🐻🐻 Janis: sounds like a party in theory Jimmy: 🔑's [wherever there is a key hidden] if you need to come back Janis: be even weirder for your poor brother if I got in his whilst you're all 🥳 Jimmy: not like he'll hear you come in Jimmy: you or the 🐻🐻🐻 Janis: don't tell him that as his next bedtime story Janis: should be good though, but cheers Jimmy: 👍 Janis: though it's tempting as it's the furthest you've wanted to let me walk in ages Jimmy: want's pushing it Jimmy: but I've seen your top 🦩 impression now Janis: I get it Janis: you wanna see it more Janis: well attractive Jimmy: #kinkunlocked Jimmy: 🎪🤹🤡 you Jimmy: dead chuffed to see your trapeze next Janis: suppose freak can be a compliment Janis: in the right context Jimmy: [puts it in the right context for a pisstakey 🔥 sext] Janis: yeah Janis: like that Janis: 🥇 asshole Jimmy: 🥉 more like Janis: why's that Jimmy: a 🥇 dickhead ain't that easy to ✔ off as a dickhead Janis: you wanted 😳 Janis: it's not not happening but I don't need to admit it Jimmy: if I wanted 😳 I'd get it Jimmy: with no need for you to admit owt Janis: alright then Janis: take your 🥉 Jimmy: you're alright Janis: time for bed then, dickhead Jimmy: as a piss off goes, I've heard worse Janis: I've done better Janis: but it must be the sugar crash Jimmy: I can do better with compliments an' all Janis: so you say Jimmy: and 🖋 Janis: I'm not doubting your fake boyf ability Jimmy: that weren't what I said Janis: or your 🎨 Jimmy: weren't bringing that up either Janis: come on Jimmy: what? Janis: 🤯 Jimmy: I dunno what you're on about Janis: it's mutual Janis: don't worry Jimmy: you heard, I can do better, nowt to be 🤯 or do a 🥁 for Janis: You can't tell me what to do or not to do either way Jimmy: that ain't what I'm trying to do Janis: that's good then Jimmy: 👌 Janis: I know you have a dog and a kid kicking you right now Janis: but you really need the beauty sleep Jimmy: rude Janis: you're ruder Jimmy: how am I? Janis: you're just Janis: I don't know Janis: but worse than me Janis: sure of that Jimmy: I were just trying to be less of a twat right then Janis: 😂 Janis: you just confuse me Janis: you aren't like 😡 🤬 rude right now Jimmy: it ain't my fault you can't take a compliment or apology attempt, dickhead Janis: I tried to take a compliment and you said it barely was one Janis: that's what I mean Janis: you're just weird and it's SO rude that you're letting Mia be right, tbh Jimmy: 'cause it weren't Jimmy: a pisstake's a pisstake, a compliment's a compliment Janis: then where have you tried to say sorry or anything not a pisstake Jimmy: what the fuck else does I can do better mean? Janis: Alright, God Janis: don't act like I'm thick Janis: you ain't speaking English Jimmy: bit racist Jimmy: this ain't even a voice memo Janis: yeah, you're well oppressed Jimmy: tah for recognising it, mate Janis: annoying, that's the word I was looking for Jimmy: funny'll do for you, oh hang on, nah Jimmy: meant to go the other way there Janis: yeah the sign of a proper jokes person is cracking yourself up Janis: 👌 babes Jimmy: piss off to bed, babes Janis: don't be jealous of all the space I've got Janis: gonna proper stretch out Jimmy: like I said, well unfunny you Janis: you can't escape when he's proper asleep? Jimmy: to where? Janis: your bed? Janis: his, if that is where you are Jimmy: his is a little kid bed, not stretching out in there Jimmy: 💔😭🎻 Janis: You poor thing Janis: bunk bed sharing would almost be preferable Jimmy: yeah Janis: at least your brother don't vape Jimmy: #ultimatesilverlining Janis: ☀ Jimmy: tah Jimmy: proper cheered now Janis: have only got a single here Janis: not living that luxurious Jimmy: and a 🐻 bear either side, you'll be fucked when the 3rd one comes through after having a piss Janis: better off taking my chances in the park? Janis: still time for that as well Jimmy: never nursed a dickhead with hypothermia before, decent way to pad out my CV Janis: 😒 Janis: yeah, go on Janis: just a neverending case study, me Jimmy: 🥇 muse in every way Janis: real or pisstake Jimmy: reckon I'd be able to 👀 you from here, could be a real inspiration Janis: you probably could anyway, nearly Janis: live pretty close but not giving any more away Janis: gotta keep the privacy and mystery, like Jimmy: brb gotta start a new 📷 IG Jimmy: @longlens Janis: 😂 Janis: if I've got a stalker I'm definitely 🥇 Janis: #madeit Jimmy: you do now Jimmy: 👋👀 Janis: get in Janis: mum'll be so proud Jimmy: got nowt else to do but crack on looking in windows til I find yours, mine'll chuffed to bits an' all Janis: Bill's 👻 will be Janis: unless you get distracted by some other random, then he'll be raging Jimmy: it's his script, I'd just be sticking to it Janis: that's going off script Janis: the other girl is before Janis: don't just get the wrong balcony and change your mind Jimmy: spoilsport Janis: it's Bill's 👻 not me Janis: he don't like improv Jimmy: harder to please than Lucas, him Janis: I'm doing alright 😇 Jimmy: he reckons your tits are 🥇 no accounting for taste Janis: nothing wrong with 🥈 Jimmy: when it's around your neck Janis: the view helps, yeah Janis: #toptits Jimmy: 😏 Janis: not your fault I'm exactly his type Janis: don't feel bad Jimmy: we can both wear the white 👰 but it don't make us exactly his type Jimmy: he'd be the one to call you a slag Janis: you have defiled me Janis: told you that's why he's so pissed off Jimmy: you gonna take an apology for that then? Janis: be a bit weird if you apologized Janis: was the plan Janis: just unfortunate collateral, him Jimmy: it weren't actually Janis: 'course it was Janis: nothing #goals about celibacy Jimmy: you know what I mean Janis: was just a joke Janis: I don't need an apology Jimmy: don't you? Janis: no Janis: why do you think I do? Jimmy: why have I got it in your own words loads of times that you reckon it shouldn't have happened if you don't? Janis: No, I only meant it like Janis: it's made things awkward now, is why we shouldn't have Janis: not in a, I didn't want to at the time way Janis: it's not like you did anything wrong Jimmy: and what, it weren't awkward for you before? Janis: What, like I've got loads of past experience with how to navigate a fake dating scenario? Jimmy: exactly my point Jimmy: it were weird as soon as I suggested it Janis: granted Janis: it's just weirder now you don't want to but we still have to fake shit Janis: if we'd not gone there, that wouldn't factor into the overall headfuckery Jimmy: I don't want to what? Janis: not fake it Janis: sometimes, like Jimmy: we've not talked about what I do or don't want Jimmy: so that's bollocks for a start Janis: it ain't Janis: I can read a room Jimmy: so can I, don't be putting it all on me like I fucked it Janis: I weren't but you clearly are so cheers for that Jimmy: you said me, I ain't speaking for you Janis: I haven't said you've fucked anything up Jimmy: I've made it weirder is what you said Janis: no, it IS weirder Janis: 'cos of decisions we both made Jimmy: that's a cop out Jimmy: I can also read between the lines and that's you reckoning the decisions you're making now are right and mine are bollocks Janis: all I'm trying to do is not be a massive twat here Janis: it's not right or wrong Janis: I can't help if I still wanna but I'm not gonna whinge about it like some nice guy or something as lame Jimmy: nicely done then Janis: fine Janis: fuck this Jimmy: I don't get what your problem is Janis: what do you mean? Janis: how do you not get that I'm accepting what you want and dealing with it and you're just taking the piss Jimmy: I've never said I want that Janis: What? Jimmy: when or where have I? Janis: that you don't want me to just do what I want and not give a fuck about what you do? Janis: it's just a given that I won't be a total cunt like that, surely Jimmy: you heard me, you don't know what I want Jimmy: dunno why it's a given that you'd just guess Janis: then tell me Janis: why am I guessing Jimmy: you've got some bollocks 💭 in your head that's nowt to do with me or what I've 🗨 Jimmy: that'll be why Janis: tell me Jimmy: It didn't feel like a mistake to me Janis: that's the opposite of what I thought you thought Janis: alright Jimmy: you were being a massive twat, keep up, we've done that bit Janis: no, great Janis: actually got to go bludgeon myself with a big rock now Jimmy: don't Jimmy: it's a job to talk to you when you ain't brain damaged Janis: I'm serious Janis: and I'm sorry Janis: jesus fucking christ Jimmy: me an' all, dunno if it's safe for you to go to this friendmas 'cause you obvs CAN'T read a room, sweetheart Jimmy: could be deadly serious, that Janis: I know I deserve it but please shut up Jimmy: 🤐 Janis: why haven't you done anything about it then Jimmy: what kind of question is that? Janis: if you can read a room, allegedly Janis: works both ways right Jimmy: you said it shouldn't have happened, how else would you like me to read into that? Jimmy: a mistake is what I heard Janis: I said that when you called me a slag Jimmy: but I didn't Jimmy: and what works both ways an' all is that you haven't done owt since then either Janis: yeah, because from my point of view, you called me easy, I made you apologize for it and then you ain't come near me since Janis: I'm not killing myself for no reason Janis: you've never said bullshit when you're fuming? Jimmy: I ain't the baby Jesus Jimmy: 'course I have Jimmy: and will do again, might be to you Janis: There you go then Janis: I said it was a mistake 'cos it sounded like you reckoned as much Janis: we may as well be on the same page Janis: didn't want to be that twat but that worked out well Jimmy: it just Jimmy: touched a nerve, alright Janis: yeah Janis: alright Janis: clearly so did the easy thing so not gonna judge Jimmy: our lives are headfucks, that's why we need this to make it easier Janis: that was meant to be the idea Janis: we just need to Janis: replan Janis: maybe? Jimmy: we just need to talk to each other Janis: easier said than done Janis: but yeah Janis: not wrong Jimmy: if I have to spell it out and stick my CAPS on, I can do Jimmy: I work in customer service, like Janis: that's lovely Janis: really wanna be compared to one of your customers Jimmy: hey, you know you're way too fit and mysterious Janis: barely at this point Janis: I've come across as a total fucking state Jimmy: Oi, we can do this ☀ girl Janis: I'm up for listening Janis: and I won't infer the rest, that much is a deal Jimmy: 🤝 Janis: 🩸🖋 Jimmy: We going to the park then or what? Janis: we don't have to speak when we get there, do we? Jimmy: bit rude you ain't gonna recite a sonnet to me, Jules, but I'll live Janis: maybe another night Janis: but I'm still pretty fucking mortified right now so you gotta promise Jimmy: we're doing alright if you're promising me another night Jimmy: and I'm clearly on fine form for giving you more accidental poetry so Janis: shame to waste it? Janis: I guess you can but don't expect me to because I'm better when I keep it shut Jimmy: you're Janis: don't finish that before I've had the chance to change your mind Jimmy: as promises go, I reckon I can keep that one Janis: and I can promise it'll be worth it Jimmy: go on Jimmy: before you stop saying owt to me Janis: I promise Janis: that you're gonna have even more to say about me and even less idea how to say it Jimmy: I Jimmy: there, you're managing to stop me going on already Janis: I don't mind when you go on Janis: just not what I want right now Jimmy: time and a place to be on script, I get it Janis: exactly Janis: and you've gotta be off the clock sometimes Jimmy: @ my manager in a bit Jimmy: just not right now Janis: not invited Jimmy: and you can't hop and @ Janis: don't challenge me Jimmy: nursing kink ain't gonna go away when your ankle stops being the size of your head Jimmy: gotta plan ahead Janis: you could just look after me Janis: I'll fake whatever injury you fancy Jimmy: how many oscars you after? Janis: 🥇 or nowt Jimmy: get a hop on then Janis: Am Janis: not trying to get caught mid-hop though so 🤫 Jimmy: 🤐 Jimmy: you could just tell me where you are and have a hand, I ain't allowed to be the one who 💀💀💀 you Janis: I could Janis: was mainly arsed about getting caught in the gaff but still Janis: be quicker Janis: [location] Jimmy: if I get there and there ain't no nan or granddad I'll chuck you the log ins for the stalker account Janis: like I've made 'em up Janis: and I've broke into a house just to be close-by? Janis: I don't reckon I'm that dedicated Jimmy: dunno about that, all I know is I could spit and you'd be hopping on a wet foot Janis: 🤤 would've been more romantic, Romeo Jimmy: Oi, I deliberately didn't say piss to be more romantic Janis: erm, talk to me!!! 😤😤😤 Janis: #ultimatekinkunlocked Jimmy: alright fine, I'll piss on the side of the house you're squatting in, stop begging Janis: 😂 Janis: good luck Janis: it's freezing Jimmy: sounds like some weird ⛄ challenge, I'd better film it for Tammy's tiktok Janis: SO thoughtful, babe Janis: just giving her that clout for free Jimmy: just that kind of dickhead, me Janis: I'll @ you in my glowing review later Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: [show up boy it's really not far] Jimmy: which window am I climbing up to with a 🌹 in my 🦷🦷 Janis: you mean, which bit of pavement am I gonna be scraping you off of when you slip to your 💀💀💀 Jimmy: challenge accepted Jimmy: your nan'll love the 💕 if you don't bother directing me Janis: I'll remember to pick up your 🦷🦷 and all Janis: [but flashing the light of the room you in like sup] Jimmy: wrap 'em up for Asia and it's job done on winning them all over Jimmy: [get your bae Jimothy] Janis: 💕🎁 Jimmy: [please don't actually die lol] Janis: [at least there is a genuine ladder up lmao, just don't wake the child or mcvickers] Jimmy: [now isn't the time for you to recite shakespeare, another time nerd] Janis: [you gotta be quiet, which is why we're not staying 'cos we know the vibe] Jimmy: [likewise why we're not going to his house either even though it's cold af] Janis: [soz about it but not, you're young and you'll be warm af soon enough] Jimmy: [gotta do what you gotta do lads and the park has those good mems and the graffiti you did so] Janis: [enjoy ladies] Jimmy: [until you have to go to work live your best life] Janis: [at least you have reconciled to totally boss this friendmas] Jimmy: [soz I ruined the tension but it would've been hard to concentrate on ruining Mia's life with that hanging over you] Janis: [we go with the flow honey] Jimmy: [we can totally skip to friendmas if you want unless you wanna have a CG work moment] Janis: [like you could but you probably shouldn't sleep out here again all night so yes, we could do a little CG moment] Jimmy: [gotta go there for the first time at some point, get that off menu smoothie and some food that's actually vaguely edible] Janis: [have cute moments, even though we know none of the flatwhites will be there] Jimmy: [we can post them to annoy Mia before we even get there because we all know Pablo isn't coming] Janis: [try one of calebs other kids hen, might be easier to use] Jimmy: [teach the bae how to do festive latte art they'll be jealous af and the manager is never there either] Janis: [do have some funny latte art pics, along with whatever we invariably actually bring yous] Jimmy: [#fated] Janis: [I kinda want you to go out and get them something pisstakey but I really cannot think what] Jimmy: [it would be funny, hmm what could we do?] Janis: [some kind of game/drinking game/or forbidden food vibe, actual fun Mia would not be happy about is the point] Jimmy: [things should totally get said during these games that they have for more blackmail potential to add to her cheating on the school trip] Jimmy: [I'm just debating whether Asia should have a bf who comes like we did at that sleepover that time or if we wanna save that for another time] Janis: [spill that tea ladies, we all know it don't take much for you to turn on each other so] Janis: [and I vote no, I think, plenty of opportunities to do that later though] Jimmy: [fair, Mia probably is hoping Asia'll seduce Jimothy so can't have a bf in the way] Janis: [and it's just BFF goals vibes, like you aren't allowed boys because they aren't important, soz Asia you hoe] Jimmy: [mhmm] Janis: [can't let lads know how weird you all are] Jimmy: [the scolding tea] Janis: [pretending to be normal is for real xmas with your fams hens] Jimmy: [I don't need to be thinking about you gals at christmas thanks] Janis: [teenage xmas is the worst tbh] Jimmy: [agreed] Jimmy: [do you think there's any decorations they could steal out of the CG or are they too hipstery?] Janis: [I think we could probably get decent indoor ones from there, steal a lil tree moment] Jimmy: [do it while the flatwhites aren't there because Mia and Ella are snitches and he don't need to get fired this close to christmas] Janis: [do it at the start of your shift and hide it, who's noticing this close to xmas, no hoe except them so stay away] Jimmy: [we need this christmas cheer excuse us] Janis: [kids would do it anyway or they'd get broke, get a life gals] Jimmy: [we're trying to save christmas for Bobby here so bye] Janis: [it'll be magical and we're stealing your lights bitch bye] Jimmy: [Ella doesn't need them, not sorry] Janis: [also, not related but meet Pete too] Jimmy: [not in a way that makes him 😒 and jealous though we've only just reconciled] Janis: [my boo says give me my fluff] Jimmy: [defs gonna draw JJ and Twix tangled up in christmas lights for today's doodle once they've decorated so there's my fluff] Janis: [that's cute af get it boy] Janis: [we can go through lowkey and then stop whenever we wanna fully do something, so, should we be one of the first to get there or last what's the vibe] Jimmy: [I think first like it's just Mia and obvs Ella cos it's her house LOL there because they'd hate that and I said Grace was late, it makes sense Hollie would be too because she's even more done with them] Janis: [that's a mood, oh gals, how welcome are you gonna make them feel] Jimmy: [can't even do the gift exchange until everyone gets here, how awkward, good thing Jimothy will shamelessly request a house tour] Janis: [the casual side-eye you're gonna have to hold in, like lemme pretend to be so uninterested in your house which is undeniably big without coming off as salty] Jimmy: [he'll carry you through this gaff gal, nothing will annoy Ella and Mia more than when you're more into each other and being coupley af than the rich gal flexes in every room] Janis: [at least we can play up how bad the ankle is again, get me ice ho] Jimmy: [Ella never did get any sympathy she'll be fuming, play up that nursing conveniently like when you get to Ella's room like oops gotta just rest here for a bit soz] Janis: [just regaling how much he's looked after you like that bitch] Jimmy: [as he fusses over you, god bless, we're literally gonna do all we can to make Mia storm out and back downstairs haha] Janis: [ergo asking where Pablo is, like oh, thought he'd be here] Jimmy: [Jimothy is so amused he's gonna hide his face in the bae] Janis: [just lowkey ignoring her to be subtly all over him when she rants about the importance of gal time or whatever like mhmm interesting] Jimmy: [literally why wasn't he banned if that's true hun, hence he'll be even more unsubtly all over her until we're genuinely ignoring the gals] Janis: [we all know it's one rule for you and another for them but that didn't pan out lololol, awkward when you'd wanna watch for an uncomfortable amount of time Mia, make Asia show please so you can't] Jimmy: [go answer the door to her so they can have a moment but also snoop through Ella's shit thank you] Janis: [just like where it the shrine honey] Jimmy: [shame it's so far in the future that she wouldn't have a paper diary for them to find, unless like they used to have those kid ones and Ella kept hers because the golden age of this friendship obvs] Janis: [imagine how 1. gay it'd be 2. all the goss on them all, have a read of that lads] Jimmy: [take 📷 because you'll never know when you might need them] Janis: [get that relevant tea 'was her sister the donkey?' 'cos Asia is here and we remembering] Jimmy: [a little lol as we forlornly shake our head because she sadly was not and they missed a trick 'Mary' because why not 'makes sense why Joseph was having none of her' just calling a child ugly here nbd] Janis: [makes a face like she's so appalled like oh no 'your brother's year must be a real bunch of uggos' 'cos we're on the same wavelength here] Jimmy: ['not saying the director's onto something but as top casting for a homeless virgin who looks like she's had her head shut in a door goes..' trailing off with a shrug like we haven't just dragged a little girl to within an inch of her life] Janis: [violently shushing him as they come up, as if Asia would ever clock it, god bless, but then it just looks like you've got an amazing in joke 'cos it's like omg babe] Jimmy: [love that cos we've gotta actually be nice to Asia as she's the first person here you can actually get on your side, so use your barista charm boy] Janis: [compliment her jumper or something girl, can't let him do everything Jimmy: [and take some selfies with her that you can easily but subtly exclude the other 2 from cos 3's already a crowd huns] Janis: [love that, and Asia should have a boyf that she wanna talk about 'cos then you can actually let her gal and she'll be buzzing] Jimmy: [yassssss encourage her in all the ways those 2 don't and won't ever] Janis: [at least you can pretend you're throwing 😍 at him when really it's pained looks lmao] Jimmy: [and we can talk about the nativity and younger sibling christmas bs because those 2 bitchy only children could never] Janis: [mhmm, hopefully you love your sisters more than just accessories gal] Jimmy: [there's no way to know but JJ are slaying this so well done lads] Janis: [honestly need some kind of award 'cos it can't be overstated how hard Mia & Ella would be trying to bitch you both out] Jimmy: [hence I'm like is there anything else you can do while it's just shameless stealing Asia tactics before the others get here because we know it's not hard to get those two on side] Janis: [Hmm, what's a stupid bitch want what's a stupid bitch need] Janis: [you'll want your latte before they go cold tbf] Jimmy: [I hope he's brought like some christmas ugly jumper biscuits from the CG because getting her hyped up on sugar will only make her more annoying] Janis: [she's basically a child, just let her live in the ways they don't tbh and she'll be thrilled] Jimmy: [literally talking to her about what she wants for christmas like she is a child LOL] Janis: [try not to cackle, but we are 1000% getting on his lap to make a sneaky point like easy 🎅} Jimmy: [never have to fake how into that we are and it's a great segue to tell her all the #goals shit we've been up to and all the festive coupley plans we have] Janis: [when you truly have like it sounds like so much, y'all will be jealous] Jimmy: [as if you aren't fuming enough by how touchy feely and loved up they are before they've even said a word] Janis: [trying to separate them but also don't want their help with anything, we see you] Jimmy: [at least when JJ have had enough they can go 🚬 and on a christmas lights scouting mission because it's #goals to go have a wander and look at lights and it gets dark early af so you can] Janis: [that is goals, don't lie, you probably need to get through dinner first my loves, just be overly helpful with the food prep so you can lowkey fuck it up and they'll be raging] Jimmy: [Grace will be buzzing when she gets there cos not only is Pablo not but she's the only one who has gifts for jj out of these gals] Janis: [thank god he ain't there, we would simply throw hands lmao, lord knows shit nan and the extra ex will be making an appearance soon] Jimmy: [Grace would have straight up walked in and straight back out again if he was and you know it Mia so good luck chatting shit about friendship then] Janis: [get to getting this starter everyone try not to actively vom at the table] Jimmy: [at least that would taste nice cos it's literally brie and cranberry and walnuts and honey so you're welcome everyone] Janis: [looking at y'all 💀💀 why do I feel like JJ need to go to the toilets immediately after like you two cannot, the shade of it all] Jimmy: [LOVE that] Janis: [sure you have more than 2 but we know what's being said huns] Jimmy: [the point has been made] Janis: 😈💩🤮❌ Jimmy: 🎻😭💔 Janis: oh no, is this the group chat? Janis: sorry Jimmy: *😱😱😱 Jimmy: if it were Janis: 😱😱😱😱😱 of 'em Jimmy: soz, you're dead right, babe Janis: though I don't think the big one is doing it right Janis: awks Jimmy: she'll be getting her bollocking now Janis: poor cow Janis: if I were to cast her in a nativity Janis: but I'm just seeing what meds they've got Jimmy: @Helena Janis: ugh, I wish Janis: what back problems is this flat-chested 💀 gonna have Jimmy: you're alright though, yeah? Janis: of course I am Janis: just potential dirt Jimmy: 👍 Janis: you alright? Jimmy: nowt wrong with my 🦶 Jimmy: might end up with back problems of my own if you ain't 💩🤮 in there but Helena'll sort it Janis: fuck off Janis: negging me, dickhead Jimmy: I get it, you're gutted there weren't no 🦒 at the birth of Jesus Jimmy: no need to take it out on me Janis: only elves in the christmas story, so you're no better off Jimmy: your 👂 kink is blatant, Jennifer Janis: psh Jimmy: not gonna stick that 💎 you owe me in mine if that's the best comeback you've got Janis: you're very annoying, I'm pretending to 💩🤮 Jimmy: no 👂's pressed against the door, putting you off? Janis: you tell me Janis: can I perform without an audience? Jimmy: we've not done 💩🤮 Janis: #kinkstillonlock Jimmy: [another pisstakey 🥺 selfie because gotta kill time in this bathroom somehow] Janis: do you reckon that's 💀#2 thing? Janis: 💀👑 is obviously killing people slowly Jimmy: bit weird you having that in common Janis: oh no Janis: have to speed it up Jimmy: ready when you are Janis: come here? Jimmy: [does] Janis: [have a little makeout moment because we're swagging this and deserve it Jimmy: [pick her up and sit her on the sink so she doesn't have to stand up and because it's a #mood] Janis: [so shook that we gasping but in a good way, like] Jimmy: [you can have a noise back gal because we're into it] Janis: [IRL 🥺 'cos we have to go back, even if we're purposefully taking ages here] Jimmy: [just doing the MOST to make her forget that we have to go back because we don't want to either] Janis: [at least there's a perfect excuse to be loud and extra so you can go 'til you get caught and someone is like excuse me get out lol] Jimmy: [the joys] Janis: [will definitely be Ella or Asia] Jimmy: [we know Mia sent you whichever one it is, probably Ella cos it's her house so she can be that bitch] Janis: [I mean, at least we didn't break your sink hun] Jimmy: [or fuck in your bed which we easily could have] Janis: [nights still young but yeah count your blessings xoxo anyway, the main meal, we probably know the vibe?] Jimmy: [you know Mia and Ella were in charge of that bit cos clearly giving Hollie pudding to call her a fat bitch and not trusting Asia with basically anything so it's not gonna be 🥇] Janis: [it's gonna be so bland with like low-fat everything and ew] Jimmy: [gonna have to start a cute little flirty food fight moment like Tony and Effy had, skins we see you and your incesty energy, when they made those faces then that spoon got flicked etc, so you don't have to eat this] Janis: [their energy was so strange lol, like they did go out so it probably didn't help but we see you, also doing a fake like you're going to eat it and you're trying to be polite but it's so gross soz we cannot] Jimmy: [everyone be pushing that food hardcore around their plates,, can't even do a feeding each other romantic moment because it's too grim] Janis: [like ladies, you can't binge and go to town for one day, not when the others can see, we get it] Jimmy: [save the day with whatever pudding you've brought Hollie thank you] Janis: [bitches be ravenous, at least we eat at the CG] Jimmy: [jimothy got your back gal, can and will eat again when you're decorating too so] Janis: [and it's time for presents] Jimmy: [I literally can't stress enough how happy and shook he's gonna be because feelsy gifts are not a thing in his life rn it's all on Bobby to make a cute card or whatever so his thank you hug will be very genuine and emosh and he'll write 'you're' on her back for that throwback because we are speechless and a ! for emphasis] Janis: [when you're lowkey thinking he's faking most of that at least but then he writes on you so you know it's real so then you're smiley af, enjoy that guys, you can't even shade 'cos it's personal and shit he wants and what do any of y'all know about that, and writing 'you' back] Jimmy: [the gals can't be shading anyway because they'll too busy DYING when he puts this necklace on her because it's intimate af, gotta gently move that hair out of the way, kiss the back of her neck in a soft way, the whole 9] Janis: [just fully ignoring them all and it ain't even fake, gotta be SO grateful excuse us] Jimmy: [we're in the moment and our feelings bitches] Janis: ['I can't even deal with you' talking more like them but where is the lie] Jimmy: [we gotta just kiss her because 1. what are words even fake words 2. you know exactly how to deal with me cos we're 🥇] Janis: [just ignore the 😒😒😒😒😒 you're getting for AGES then be like oh, please, open your presents] Jimmy: [just being couple goals casually in the background while the gals pretend to care about each other's gifts] Janis: [I live] Jimmy: [highlight of the day tbh] Janis: [you know they wrapping up and putting that shite film on so fast honey, like oh yeah, give them an excuse to cuddle under a blanket] Jimmy: [literally Mia is this close to kicking all of y'all out and it ain't even her house] Janis: [it's so funny how easy it is to piss y'all off, do have to remember to keep the rest vaguely on side though] Jimmy: [you've done well lads and we all know none of the gals actually wanna watch this film they probably do the same one every year, just on their phones super bored] Janis: [you gotta lowkey suggest you play a game instead like come on this is BOOOOOOOORING] Jimmy: [he's a boy he's allowed to hate rom coms so it's easily done] Janis: [you two 💀 can protest but clearly we're over it so you outnumbered even if Asia was like I don't mind or whatever] Jimmy: [get that tea, especially if it's a drinking game because they are all lightweights] Janis: [we know this could get passive-aggressive fast lol] Jimmy: [it will blatantly which is how we can bring this friendmas to an end without it looking like JJ's fault] Janis: [hohaha just like this is awkward gals] Jimmy: [run away and look at aka steal some lights lads, your work here is done] Janis: [you can go decorate his now and make the kids day] Jimmy: [though we might have to kill some time and do it when they're asleep because I doubt we were at Ella's that late] Janis: [true hen, we know we killed this party before tea time honestly lol] Jimmy: [walk some dogs together first of all] Janis: [get that cash babies] Jimmy: [they should come back and eat some actually nice christmassy snacks and watch a christmas film that doesn't suck and play a game with Bobby that doesn't end in murder like this is how easy it is to do better than you gals] Janis: [yes, 'cos 1. real 2. all they'd have to do was a couple of pics and everyone would know the flatwhites was a flop] Jimmy: [exactly and she hasn't met Bobby yet so I thought that'd be a nice chill way to do it cos not trying to make it a thing™] Janis: [yes, this is true, rip to not seeing your marvellous sheep performance hen] Jimmy: [and he can talk about wanting to see Santa to put that idea in jj's heads] Janis: [easy] Janis: Oi Janis: use your elf connections Jimmy: 🎅 or nowt, me Jimmy: [takes off that ugly christmas jumper in a pisstakey way like I've got the body for it] Janis: [😏 and pats his tummy like yeah] Jimmy: [fakes like he's gonna put a cushion up his top but then chucks it at her head] Janis: [whispers the obscenities behind Bobby's head] Jimmy: [signs something at her which is obvs 6 year old level insults to make Bobby lol and join in] Janis: [just getting dragged, fake cry so Twix comes to support you gal] Jimmy: [we'll teach you gal it's always useful] Janis: [love that] Jimmy: [at least if Cass comes back we can bribe her into walking some dogs for us because don't need the 😒 when we've just escaped the flatwhites] Janis: [at least you'll get some spends gal, because that age you can't even get your own job so it's pocket money purely] Jimmy: [win her over as well lads nicely done] Jimmy: 🏆🥇💪 us Janis: I'll be waiting for my card, like Jimmy: 🐾 an' all Janis: awh Janis: you don't need to sign it Janis: got the doodles Jimmy: subtle Jimmy: I ain't forgot I owe you one Janis: 🕥 Janis: gonna be THAT bitch 🙄 Jimmy: nowt more #goals than nagging a lad to 💀💀💀 babes Janis: except that friendmas, AM I RIGHT Jimmy: [IRL LOL because] Janis: [😏] Janis: kinda sad how easy that was Jimmy: [a shrug because we see them all the damn time at the CG we knew how easy it'd be] Jimmy: alright, I'll give you a challenge, girl, stop begging Janis: just saying Janis: BFFs it ain't Jimmy: and you'd never know from the group chat Janis: yeah Janis: the performance they put on would be almost impressive if it weren't tragic 'cos no one cares Jimmy: [chucks her some gingerbread house kit like there's your challenge babe because they always suck and never stick together and taste gross 'make that look goals and you'll impress me']] Janis: [obviously we're gonna do it 'cos can't turn a challenge, also roping Bobby into helping by letting him eat some of the sweets which are the only nice part of tbh, just LOOKing at him like 'why would I need to do that?' like is it don't care to or is it already have, we know] Janis: *down Jimmy: [Twix not helping but getting involved god bless her, we're giving her a LOOK back because always will hen 'might just be worth it' cos remember when she made that promise before they went to the park last night, he does] Janis: [God loves a trier Twix, lowkey feeding one of the gingerbread people to her and doing mini screams of terror as it gets its head chomped off lol, then having to hide our 😳s 'cos of course it will be and of course we do] Jimmy: [just watching this and falling in love nbd] Janis: [when you've inadvertently done them a solid there 'cos there's usually a mummy and a daddy and then 2 kids so like, fuck you Ian we're just making Jimmy and Cass and Bobby and there's no awkwardness over missing mum] Jimmy: [I didn't even think of that goodbye] Janis: [like thank you girl for swerving that lmao, also putting the shades on him and holding it up like eh, eh?!] Janis: likeness is uncanny Jimmy: Oi, where's my 🚬? Janis: there's nothing festive about throat cancer Jimmy: Dickens 👻'd disagree Jimmy: he's 💔 it got cut in the edit Janis: there's still time for your manager to show up with a goose Janis: and if you get me some crutches, you won't have to do so much heavy lifting Jimmy: more of a 🐷 you but we'll crack on regardless Janis: you're so rude Janis: if I WAS Miss Piggy, I'd kick you down right now Jimmy: one good trotter an' all 💕 Janis: it's important I keep you under it Janis: Kermit is the ultimate cuck Jimmy: #ultimategoals Jimmy: 💀👑 can't even get a text back Janis: she's the rat Jimmy: keep it between us 💀#2 is gonna be gutted they ain't ⛓ together Janis: for all eternity Janis: being judgy af Jimmy: her only kink unlocked Janis: there's fuck all 🧠 or 💪 energy left to have any other passion Janis: it's 💀👑 and nothing else and that's the way they 💕 it Jimmy: [sends her his fave gayest pages of the diary like LOL cos they only had time to skim read at the time] Janis: [trying not to actually lol out loud 'cos still doing this house and watching this film] Janis: imagine 💬 that and not faking it Jimmy: [nudges her because we wanna hear that lol soz if we knock you when you're building] Jimmy: imagine 💭 that BEFORE you were 🧠 dead Janis: [a face like HOW DARE, don't sabotage me, boy but we grinning] Janis: maybe she was WELL lovely before my sister started hanging about Janis: she will do that to you, like Jimmy: [😘 like ILY babe I would NEVER] Jimmy: Puberty'll do that when you wanna fuck your daddy an' all Jimmy: not to snatch away your 🏆 or owt, Gracie Janis: [dangling gingerbread him over her tea like I'll do it, bitch, try me] Janis: she's used to it Janis: 🏅 participation Jimmy: [a look like do it because death wish 5ever] Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Janis: [acting like we really considering it, before putting him back and getting to work on a frosting Twix 'cos tah for being the right colour and texture lowkey lol] Janis: death march more appropriate after today Jimmy: kill bill siren sound Janis: love to take a samurai sword to 'em                                                                                                                         ' Janis: 💔 my christmas ruined Jimmy: more 🏆 than them tiktoks with the 🍏 🍎 🍐 🍊 🍋 🍌 🍉 🍇 🍓 🍈 🍒 🍑 🥭 🍍 🥥 🥝 Janis: but not more 🏆 than this gaff Jimmy: 🤞 Janis: yeah, reserve your judgment 'til I'm finished Jimmy: til we're finished, dickhead Janis: I will have to do the high ones though Jimmy: [another playful nudge like piss off and the gingerbread house wall will be falling] Janis: [lowkey pissed off haha not majorly but attacking him with this frosting like STAPH] Jimmy: [playfight because always] Janis: [being like, Bobby, please protect the castle, I'mma fight off this monster real quick] Jimmy: [that sweet boy gonna take his job so seriously god bless] Janis: [as are we you're going down jimothy] Jimmy: [until we use distracting tactics like picking up the pendant part of that necklace like oh hey remember this and how much you love me] Janis: [looking at Bobby like you have to play fair when there's other people about] Jimmy: [draws a 🏆 on whatever bare skin there is, obvs taking our time to be flirty af cos we're always playing to win honey] Janis: [at least you don't have to worry about calling him a dickhead right now 'cos we must lest we say anything else] Jimmy: [likewise can say 'you' back and not worry about how his voice shamelessly sounds, ah deaf brother perks] Janis: [write 'later' on him 'cos we can promise that] Jimmy: [just as well because Cass can't be out walking dogs forever and she will charge in all snowy and cold like make me a cuppa bitch and obvs Jimothy will] Janis: [and she would not be happy at this scene because grumpy tween life, so focus you two] Janis: you know how I like it Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: [jimothy just shouting through like a fussy dad @ Cass like if you want a warm shower or bath go after this cos I'mma be starting Bobby's bedtime routine soon] Janis: [probs not at all mortified you did that in front of Janis, nice one boy] Jimmy: [she hates him so much during this time period I lol Janis: [poor boy, you're doing you're best, we all are] Janis: [at least you can clear away this gingerbread carnage] Jimmy: [join him in the kitchen gal but not in the flirty way he hoped would be happening a bit ago] Janis: [just subtly helping without being asked always, love that for yous] Jimmy: [she's so caring in a way that he is not used to at all, it kills me] Janis: [just coming up behind him in a fake-out trying to scare you but not actually way 'you want me to clear out of here for a bit?' like, come back later when they're asleep vibes] Jimmy: [just saying no before he can stop himself and then it's like well now I wanna die] Janis: [just nodding like okay, 'cos not gonna make a big deal even though that was obviously a speedy reply] Jimmy: [doing his own nod towards the window like the weather is the reason we don't want her to go even though we know now how close mcvickers gaff is and that she'd be fine] Janis: ['I'm fine with staying cosy' and takes half the teas in] Jimmy: [shit like this is why we're falling in love with you gal] Janis: [like we are gonna feel slightly awkward whilst he's sorting his siblings but we know the drill from our own back in the day so we can deal] Jimmy: [we'll be sending Cass upstairs for her long bath like my boo used to have because being a tween is the worst okay, good thing Ian isn't here for how long she'll be in there and the music blasting but we're gonna be stuck with Bobert for a while cos he won't wanna go to bed] Janis: [when you partying, live your dreams babe, can't fight you, put on a slightly more chill xmas movie maybe, like idk, polar express or something, he'll fall asleep eventually] Jimmy: [Twix and Bobby falling asleep between you on this sofa like an adorable cockblock] Janis: [just looking over at him like, mission accomplished] Jimmy: [taking them upstairs to bed when it's safe to without waking them, the bae can take a snoozy Twix for you, nodding at Bobby's bed like told you I wouldn't be able to stretch out on that] Janis: [mimes measuring the bed and him like hmm, idk] Jimmy: [playfully pushes her out of the room] Janis: [at least you can take your chance to push him back and have a kiss in this corridor] Jimmy: [glad Cass' music will cover up how loud Jimothy is because of how badly he's wanted to kiss her for what would feel like an age] Janis: [you'll be so glad you didn't hear that, gal, well done, just like 'some santa' though 'cos where is your sneakiness] Jimmy: [looking at the necklace and back to her like excuse you I'm a great santa] Janis: [looking down and then touching it 'it's not totally shit, actually' obvs we were 😍 earlier but that was in front of the gals] Jimmy: [a shrug like it's all so casual and we don't give a fuck either 'did the job' because obvs it was all about impressing the gals and not her] Janis: ['glad I don't have to bin it' 'cos we actually like it and it's not basic just because we had to do a #goals gift moment] Jimmy: ['weren't where I got it out of' because we clearly did buy this there's no way you could've stolen it feasibly as it's jewellery] Janis: [raising a brow, 'you don't want it back, do you?' like are you saying it's too expensive or something] Jimmy: [shakes his head 'my tits'll never pass for yours' like I can't take #goals pics for the gram pretending I'm you so there's no point] Janis: [turns like good, 'cos I'm not giving it back, good day] Jimmy: [go put these decorations up and Jimothy will play the I saw mummy kissing Santa song to make the point like he ain't sneaky either so] Janis: ['that's because it's the dad, not the real santa, dickhead' like get ur facts straight hun] Jimmy: ['never said I were the real santa, Janet' like I'm just good at it like I am at everything thank you] Janis: [mime a 💔 and also a 🤫 'you are tonight'] Jimmy: ['sounds like I'll be going to see him in a bit' cos Bobby wants to, an unimpressed face like lucky me 'don't reckon he'll be fuming about the roleplay though, we're alright'] Janis: [😍 like LUCKY YOU 'there's one in [a place I've not looked up but I'm sure exists lol] that's meant to be pretty good'] Jimmy: [gets his phone out and has a look before giving her an IRL 👍 like a nerd because it looks decent enough] Janis: [bows like ya welcome] Jimmy: ['you coming?' cos she didn't do the nativity and the reason that would've looked #goals is the same here] Janis: [is thinking 'can I bring someone?'] Jimmy: [is a bit like whomst but nods because yeah obvs you can] Janis: ['alright then' like not gonna elaborate lol ok] Jimmy: [says it back and we're cracking on with these decorations] Janis: [get it gals, make it look magical] Jimmy: [at least his house isn't huge so it won't take you forever] Janis: [though it is a house so don't die doing an outside moment, make it work, like] Jimmy: [#teamwork but do take a break when you are outside to piss about with the snow even though there isn't loads you can still chuck it at each other and then get each other with your cold hands] Janis: [no more park for you gals, looking in the general direction of thinking as much] Jimmy: [looking where she's looking and thinking the same things, it was nice while it lasted lads, when he REALLY wants to tell her to stay here but we already embarrassed ourselves in the kitchen being like DON'T GO so we can't say anything] Janis: [at least this will keep you busy for a while, before you have no obvious reason to stay] Jimmy: [could feasibly take hours because it takes ages just to do a tree sometimes] Janis: [mhmm honey bunny, this is still gonna be awks though, at least you can say that you wanna bring your niece and work out those logistics like are we going tomorrow orrr 'cos not long now sweaty] Jimmy: [we probably are realistically, ew I hate to imagine how busy it would be] Janis: [my boo say disgusting lmao, at least you can make this goodbye more natural now like gotta get up for that hens, just being like, hope Bobby loves the decs 'cos we do] Jimmy: [gotta be in the morning so he can work in the afternoon because busy time and we need that cash honey, the greatest and best hug goodbye because it's been such a feelsy day] Janis: [trying not to linger and failing lowkey, we see y'all] Jimmy: [will offer to walk you home as if you haven't just been putting decs up with that ankle, we know you just are trying to keep this going] Janis: [do we reckon it's too late for public transport, like you don't wanna go home and you are just gonna come back tomorrow, soz mcvickers showing up again] Jimmy: [mcvickers are used to it and she needs Libi early that's our excuse] Janis: [let him walk you back then gal] Jimmy: [🚬 break during this walk back because there wouldn't have been enough of those today] Janis: [chance to breathe hens, you been busy, ruining lives, making days] Jimmy: [let it hit you boy how close christmas actually is] Janis: [we're all shook, like your mother must be hitting you up gal, what's the tea this year] Jimmy: [gonna ask her if she wants to go for breakfast tomorrow before this santa appointment because he wants Bobby to have a nice time, like we know we have to work a lot soz little man] Janis: ['as long as you aren't suggesting going in to work early' like you love your job SO much babe but obvs, we are down] Jimmy: [such an unamused noise and face because I can only imagine the hell that the CG is on the daily never mind at festive times] Janis: [😏 'cos we've literally been in ONCE at this point and we're like yeah, I know, y'all can go somewhere decent] Jimmy: [somewhere these bubs will love and think is so swag but you won't hate every second of] Jimmy: [when you wanna be like THANKS for today post friendmas but it's awkward so you just pull her back a little bit and then you're just there like -] Janis: [Dublin looks like there's loads of cool places in general so I have faith, doing the signature ?] Jimmy: [just looking at her like if you could read my mind rn that would be great] Janis: [so rude you cannot tbh, just pushing him gently like what though, like don't freak me out] Jimmy: ['tah for-' gestures back in the direction of his house 'our kid'll be chuffed to bits when he has a look'] Janis: [shrugs like nbd 'won't pass it on to #2' 'cos lots of those decs were hers but fuck you gal 'take a pic if he looks cute' 'cos we blatantly wanna see his reaction but not gonna outright say that so we just pretending it could be #goals content] Jimmy: ['should work in a grotto or some bollocks next year, you' not even a pisstake because she's great with kids and swagged that but we'll pretend we are, nods and mimes that he'll record his 😱 reaction, again we probably will but we can pretend we're taking the piss out of Grace's vlogmas vibes] Janis: ['you're the elf' and a face like lord no, do your own 👍 and go inside bitch] Jimmy: ['yeah and I'll have a word' heart hands like love you gal] Janis: [blow a kiss like you're buzzing at the prospect] Jimmy: [catch it as you watch her go boy]

[inklingleesquidly]

Yo-Fest

Chapter 6

Lee Squidly gets a special call by the headpriestess of Knifefish Shrine to take part in special preparations for one of the biggest holidays celebrated by Inkopolis’ ghostly neighbors, Yokai. Yo-Fest is only a week away and it’s up to Lee to make sure the fesitivies go off without a hitch.

He’s not alone though; joining him is his pals Guist, Juddinyan, and his many Yokai friends who are just a dial away via his Yokai Smartwatch.

Featuring the characters of @askvincent

Chapter 5 available here

Word count: 6,208 words

Lee jolted up with a sharp gasp.  From the sheets pooled around his lap, he recognized where he was. He wasn’t home but instead was in the common room of the main pavilion of Knifefish Shrine.  

Through desperate pants for air he wondered if what happen to him really happen? Was it a dream? He touched his face and then his chest as a cold sweat rolling down his cheek.  Did he really, truly go to the Yokai Realm?  What happened after? By now he was desperate to collect his frantic, fragmented thoughts.  

Clutching his Yokai Smartwatch, there was something amiss; there was an unshakable feeling that dominated his mind. Before he could give it a moment of thought, the room’s door slid open.  

The startled Inkling screeched and squeezed his eyes shut from the light of the outside flooding into the solemn room.  Standing there was Lyra, the shrine's head priestess who greeted him with a deep sigh of relief. “Thank goodness you’re finally awake.”

“Miss Lyra?” He groggily questioned? “Miss Lyra!” Suddenly remembered everything that had transpired, he darted up from his futon bed. Without sparing a thought he threw his arms around her waist, elated to see the shrine maiden unharmed. “Miss Lyra are you okay? What happened to us? I-- I—where is everyone? Guist? Juddinyan? A-and--.”

Stern and pragmatic as she always was, Lyra informed him of the grim news. “--They're all gone.” As she politely pushed him back, he got a look at her remorseful stare. “I can’t feel any sort of spiritual presence anywhere. I don’t think King Inkma was kidding around; I believe every Yokai on earth has been called back to the Yokai Realm.”

This feeling Lee had. Everything around him felt so—still, so lifeless, so strangely dismal. Was this a result of all the Yokai being gone?  His thoughts raced a mile a minute so he could only babble out his words. “B-but they have to come back! Yo-fest! T-The-They can’t miss it, we--.”

The holy woman silenced him with a hand on his shoulder. “With or without them we'll continue with the ceremony and boffer—ahem, excuse me, offer the bamboo feast as we always have.”

“B-But—But--.”

“No buts.” Her hand fell from his shoulder to her side. “Everything else is out of our mortal hands now. We can only keep going as we always have.”

There were hundreds of things Lee wanted to say and questions he wanted to ask. There was so much he didn’t understand and so much more that troubled him.  

In the end all that he could say was, “What do you need me to do today?” The brooding in her voice told him all they could do was accept the outcome fate had dealt to them.

Lyra said, “Today is the harvest. You've done the job I asked you to do so today I'd like you to dake the day off—I mean take the day off.”

“Are you sure?” Lee asked? “Can’t I help you with it at all?”

His offer was expediently declined. “The harvest and preparation of the bamboo is only to be done by the women of the cloth.”

“But--.”

“Lee,” she countered with that firm and strict voice, “You've done more than enough. You risked your life for this shrine, for your friends, and most definitely for me. It’s high time you did something for yourself so do whatever you want before the festival starts. You've earned it.”

As she spun around to leave, that signified she wanted the end of the conversation but Lee couldn’t just leave it at that. “But what about you though?”

The priestess stopped at the door's threshold. It took her a moment to analyze and reply to that question. “Returning to my duties will help me.”  

Lee believed her, he really did; she had so much pride in the work she devoted her life to. He kept that in mind yet he couldn’t shake that there was a startling sadness in her voice.

Whatever I want? As much as Lyra suggested he relax, it just wasn’t in Lee to sit around doing nothing. To alleviate this, he resolved to take a stroll around the property.

Making his exit, the first sight he encountered was the normally empty plot of land across the street from the shrine. It was already filled by early rising vendors. The vacant lot belonged to the shrine and was used for events such as tonight's festival. Yo-Fest may have been the main event for him and Lyra but Olden Days, the celebration of Inkopolis's history was also to take place. From here he could see all manner of trucks, trailers, and currently bare stands readying to dispense food and fun.  

Food, Lee thought.

He thought back to the first time he came to Knifefish Shrine.  “Both fests going on at once is how I get double Tofu Takoyaki,” Juddinyan had said. His shoulders sank when he thought about that so he walked away.

He didn’t get far before coming upon a dry divot in the soil. Days earlier it had been filled with water, making it the sight of one of Leakina's tricks.  He thought back to how she made him step into puddle with only his socks on. That moment had previously made him furious but now…

“Huff.” The troubled teen could only let out a sigh. The rest of the day was exactly like that. No matter where he went his mind was flooded with memories he had made during his week at the shrine.

There's the sunflowers the Moleymoreys really liked.

The shrine of the Misty Maiden. It looks so empty now.

That's where Leakina and I both talked.

Everything was so quiet, and so lonely. If not for the gentle lapping of water from the stream it would've been completely encompassing. He wanted to hear Guist cheerfully blather about how good the weather was, to see Juddinyan hop and bound through the tall grass, or even for Leakina to flick water in his face.

Anything...

Maybe some food would help clear his mind? A trip to the convenience store just a block away was in order. With a bag of sour cream & onion chips and a bottle of cola, the smallest of smiles found its way to his face as he returned to the shrine.

RRROOOOOM

A bus rolled by him, coming to a halt at the weathered wooden bench just below the stoop leading up to the shrine. That was the same stop where Kakkonyan and Wanderzan arrived.  

Seeing that made Lee weakly toss his half-empty containers of food in the trash, his appetite gone. That pit in his stomach just couldn’t be filled by junk food.

Being so preoccupied with his thoughts, he failed to notice how the collection of the bamboo had been proceeding. At first he wondered how long ago were the morning prayers? No matter how much time had passed he was still impressed at how the entire field was almost completely cleared away by all of the shrine maidens.  

There was one particular scene that caught  his eye. It  was two Inkling girls, the youngest of the priestesses in-training that he was familiar with. From his distance, Lee couldn’t tell what they were talking about but he could see one of them holding something out in her hand for the other to see. She then threw whatever it was up in the air with a hearty laugh.  

Seeing that made him hang his head low; remembering Guist haphazardly throwing seeds everywhere when they first started. Heaving another heavy sigh, he solemnly brushed his tentacles out of his face.  No matter where he went it was just impossible not to think about them, and miss them.

“Ohh Lee.”

ACCCK!

He failed to notice someone had approached him. “Wha--? Oh Kaitlyn,” he breathed with ease, “I'm sorry I was just kinda, umm, thinking.”

The quiet anemone aologized cordially. “I'm so sorry for scaring you.”

“Nah,” Lee interrupted with a wave of his hand, trying to play it off like she didn’t actually startle him.

“Sister Lyra has a special surprise for you.” She grabbed his hand and jerked his arm, hurrying him along to follow her. “Come on, we can't keep her waiting.”

They found the head priestess at the rear of the base of the shrine where she was giving directions to other maidens. “Fantastic, we have even more than we did last year.” She said, pointing to the harvest crop piled high in plastic buckets. Tapping at a tablet computer’s screen she then gave further instructions. “Okay, take them to be boiled and don’t forget which batch is for frying and which is for stewing.”

Turning around, Lyra jolted at the sight of her trainee with the high-strung Inkling. “Ohh! Oh it's you two. Kaitlyn what have I told you about sneaking up on people? It's rude!”

“Forgive me Sister Lyra.” Kaitlyn said in that hushed voice of hers, bowing her head, “But I found Lee just like you asked.”

With a modest wave, Lee asked, “You have a surprise for me, Miss Lyra?”

“Yes actually,” she confirmed, “And here it is.” He never would've expected her to slide an apparel box into his arms.  The priestess exclaimed, “It's a token of thanks for everything you've done. Go ahead, open it.”

Lee was rather hesitant at first; due largely to how beautifully wrapped the rectangular package was. The paper was a smooth muted brown color that hadn’t a mark or blemish on it, and the whole thing was secured with a green ribbon tied in an ornate bow. When he looked up to see Lyra giving a hurrying gesture, he tore the packaging apart to unearth his gift inside.

It was some sort of cloth; colored black and gray with what he noticed were pieces of silver speckled material stuck to the gray portions. He removed it from the box to watch as it unfurled within his hands. He marveled at his gift with an awestruck “Oh my stars,” only to dumbly ask, “Is it some kind of bath robe?”

That managed to get Lyra to snicker. “What, that? Well you’re close, it's a yukata like they wear for festivals in the east. The girls all pitched in to help sew it for you.”

“I made the collar.” Kaitlyn declared.

Lyra clarified, “You helped with the collar.” She then revealed, “We each gave our own blessings when we were making it so keep that in mind. Every time you wear it you carry a little bit of all of us here at Knifefish Shrine with you.”

With an inquisitive smile and a twinkle in his eye, Lee breathed out. “I love it.” He did inquire after slipping it on, “Is there a special way that you're supposed to wear this?”

How he tried to cross the right side of the garment over the left got another little chuckle out of Lyra. “No,” she said, covering her mouth with her palm. “Kaitlyn, please take him and show him how to do it right.”

Kaitlyn quickly agreed, confirming with a submissive bow. “Yes ma'am.” She said, grabbing at Lee's wrist again in spite of protests he gave.

“W-wait, isn't there a guy who can show me how?” His modesty against the opposite sex fell on deaf ears as Lyra returned to her work. In that moment he really analyzed how she conducted herself with him and her subordinates. Maybe it was true what she said; returning to her normal life really did do the trick for her. She was back to normalcy despite such an unfathomable event. Or so he thought…

It did not take long for him to be fitted into his festival garb and he was quite relieved when Kaitlyn suggested he could wear his clothes underneath. With a feel-good spring in his step he rushed to meet Lyra again to show her only to be informed that she had retreated to the bathhouse. Sure enough he did find her there, alone and mysteriously crouched on the faux-stone floor.

“Miss Lyra?” Lee whispered.

Whipping her head around, Lyra gasped. “Ohh, Lee!” She stood up sharply, a handful of rubble from the statue clutched in her hands. “I was just,” she sputtered unsurely before clearing her throat, “I can’t believe I've been gone less than a day and nobba—ahem, not one girl here comes to clean up this mess. I'm going to have them all spit shine the entire shrine from top to bottom for this.”

Her shortness of breath, the somber look in her eyes, the way she so tightly held the statue’s broken pieces; despite her best attempts there was no hiding how troubled she was. The priestess was quick to realize he saw through her façade with the downtrodden stare he offered her in response.

Carefully approaching the subject, Lee inquired, “What's on your mind Miss Lyra?”

“We went to the Yokai Realm, Lee. No living mortal is ever meant to pass into that world.” He failed to comprehend the true weight of their experience as the grave look in her eyes shown. “We both saw things not meant for mortal eyes and yet here we both are. It makes me think. Who am I? Where am I even going? I know my purpose is my faith,” she clutched her chest, “I know that with all my heart but deep down I feel there's so much missing.”

Confused, uncertainty, utterly lost; we had felt those exact feelings before, himself.  Due to very recent events in his life he was making greater strides to find himself on his own terms. As for Lyra had been marinating in those thoughts longer than he had so what could he hope to do to even attempt to help her? The only thought he had was to extend his hand, literally reaching out to her to signify their common ground.  

Just as he tried, the bath water suddenly  began to drain away. Lyra panicked but watching as the rising steam gathered together, Lee knew precisely what that meant.

The portal to the Yokai Realm was opening!

YA HA HA HA!

A laugh echoed from beyond; a mirthful, mischievous laugh one might mistake for malicious.

YA HA HA HA!

It sounded again, that ghastly laugh ringing louder in their ears as it drew closer. Whatever this mystery was it was solved in an instant as none other than Leakina herself came soaring through the open gate.  

Both Inklings were utterly astonished to see her, so much that neither could follow her movements as she twirled her ghostly body around Lee.

“Heeeey Leeker!” She squealed with boundless joy.

His eyes spun with dizziness in trying to follow her, so much that he could only stammer out his response. “Wha-bhu-ahh, Leakina?”

“Lyra!” The watery specter fastly turned her attention to the priestess; uncoiling herself from Lee and circling her arms around the young woman's neck. Their eyes met, Leakina grinned from ear to ear as she hovered closer and closer within Lyra's space.

Her sudden proximity caused the maiden's cheek to become flushed. “Leakina,” she whispered. “Water you-- whudder—what are you doing here?” Her brow furrowed, remembering the damage she had done and how she was furious with her. “You're supposed to be ban—UMMF!”

Was it the spontaneous, unpredictable nature of Yokai? Perhaps it  was the feelings Leakina held deep within her heart? Whatever it was, Lee lurched back in surprise as he watched  Lyra be silenced with a kiss right on the lips. Was it as much a shock to her as it was to him? He was unsure because she didn’t appear to offer even a hint of resistance or displeasure from it.

Before he knew it someone else came barreling through the portal. “Cowabunga dude!”

“Guist!” Lee gave a joyful gasp as he watched the squid spirit soar toward him.

“Cus!” Guist cried through emotional, misty eyes.

Neither needed to exchange any more words; Lee held out his arms to the pint sized poltergeist as he flew straight into a squeezing hug.

That wasn’t all though;  an excited MRROW sounded from the coolest cat in the Yokai Realm and the Mortal World as he came bounding into the bathhouse.

Lee called out breathlessly. “Juddinyan!” The agile feline jumped onto the teenager, climbing his way under his shirt, and up his body. Though those razor sharp claws painfully dug into his flesh again and again, Lee could only laugh to the point of tears from his happiness.

Popping his head out through Lee's collar, Juddinyan inquired, “Did you me'iss us?”

“Only a whole lot!” Lee answered straight away, shrugging Juddinyan off his back but catching him in his arms in order to embrace both him and Guist and never let go.

There was so much happiness and most especially love in the bathhouse as the Yokai and mortal Inklings were reunited. It didn’t last long as one more entity stepped out, the very aura that they emitted causing every eye to be upon them.

Lyra was the first to point them out. “Lord Inkma!” She threw herself to the ground, followed by everyone else in observance of the arrival of the Yokai sovereign.

As he made his approach he declared, “Arise. I have important matters to discuss, and they have to do with you.” He pointed an accusatory finger to Lee.

“Me?” Lee pointed to himself.

Inkma began to explain. “It is forbidden for mortals to enter the Yokai Realm.”

“But I--.” Lee tried to start.

“—I know you came to rescue your friend.” Inkma finished for him, “But good intentions do not excuse breaking the laws of our world.” Glancing around at the other occupants of the bathhouse, nobody had an argument to offer, especially not with  what Inkma said next. “You are also guilty of multiple counts of a crime of harboring escaped criminals.”

With a snap of his fingers three clouds of black smoke appeared beside him, dissipating away to reveal all three of the Yokai criminals along with those attached to them.

Boss Moley spoke on behalf of himself and his assembly of Moleymoreys. “We had our fun but we got a bone to pick with that skunk.”

With a hand on Tropicanna’s shoulder, Dehydreaded said, “I just wanted my little flower back. I’m ready to serve out the rest of my time.”

“I’ll come visit you every day, Daddy.” Tropicanna added with a hug around her father’s waist.

Finally, Paranumbra complained, “There’s too much light here, even at night! I want to go back to my dark prison cell.”

King Inkma walked forward, speaking directly to Lee. “The law of the Yokai Realm is that fate should fit one’s character so this will be your punishment.” He stopped in front of him; despite their similar appearances, King Inkma’s firm, statuesque stance trounced Lee’s nervous and hunched demeanor. The Yokai King gave his judgement. “Because of your kindness and ease of friendship towards others you will become the Ambassador of Mortal and Yokai Affairs. Whenever there is trouble between worlds you will be the one to answer the call.”

The Ambassador of Mortal and Yokai Affairs? Lee could only stand there, dumbfounded as question after question arose in his mind. There was one in particular that King Inkma seemed to answer of his own accord, leading Lee to wonder if the monarch was psychic?

“If you refuse then look into the celestial mirror to see what will become of you.” He held up the mirror that hung around his neck. “What do you see?”

“Mm-Myself,” Lee answered. It was a mirror after all.

“What else?” Inkma replied.

He peered closer. Was there something he was missing? “I don’t see anything.”

“That’s right,” revealed Inkma. “If you refuse then you will spend eternity in purgatory. You will not receive judgement for your deeds in life, and you won’t even become a Yokai.”  

This ultimatum brought about a stunned silence to everyone present. Even the Yokai criminals were at a loss for words.

The king asserted, “What’s it going to be?”

Now all eyes were on Lee. How was he possibly going to answer? The vague weight of such a responsibility placed upon him by the most intimidating Yokai of both worlds was unfathomably insurmountable  

“That sounds fair, I’ll do it!”

Nobody had known the frustration this last week had brought him; how he felt so miserable that he contemplated dropping his smartwatch in the river. He wanted to be done with Yokai forevermore. In spite  of that that though,  the mere hours not knowing what would become of the friends he made felt so much worse. He didn’t want to go through again.

“Do I get a badge or something?” The eager boy queried while shaking his clenched fists.

Inkma answered with a stern, “No.” He folded his hands behind his back and lifted his head in contemplation. “Now that that’s settled there’s the matter of this new portal being opened. We’re going to need to find a guard to watch it.”

Straight away, Leakina pushed Lee aside, eagerly waving her hand. “Ooo, me! Me! Pick me! I’ll do it!”

“The job is yours,” Inkma decided without a second thought. “There’s also the problem that our new Ambassador needs a chronicler; someone to be in charge of receiving and recording all of your assignments.”

This time Guist was the one to rush in. He cried out excitedly, “Dude! I’ll do it!”

“Done, you’re the Ambassador’s Chronicler.” Inkma tapped his chin, puzzled by one last order of business.  “Now you just need a savvy partner knowledgeable of both worlds to shadow you on each endeavor.”

“Meow?” Juddinyan raised a single paw.

That was well enough for King Inkma who said, “Excellent, glad we could make this easy.” It was all happening so fast, Lee could barely keep up. What’s worse was the Yokai monarch decided their business was finished. “Now then, I’m returning to the Yokai Realm with these criminals. We’ll be in touch for your first assignment, whenever that will be.” With that, he returned to the three convicts, all disappearing In the same puffs of smoke as they arrived.

He might have strong armed into the job but what did Lee really get himself into? That thought was shaken out of his head as he suddenly felt Leakina leaning all of her weight on his shoulder.

“YA HA HA HA, isn’t this great Leeker?” She laughed right into his ear.  “We’re gonna see even more of each other than ever.”

Guist hovered in front of Lee, happily wiggling not only his tentacles but his whole body. “This is mondo cool Cus, we’re gonna be chillin’ so much too!”  

Finally, Juddinyan hopped up excitedly, eager at what was to come. “We’ll be able to go to the Meowkai Realm whenever we want. Isn’t that great?”

“Yeah,” Lee readily agreed, “That’s all great!” He meant that sincerely, he wouldn’t want it any other way. However, he had something to address with the Yokai. “If we’re going to do that though I think we need to set some ground rules first.”

Later that night...

The time had come at last; with the sun setting and the shroud of night rolling over the city, the celebrations were ready to begin. Creatures all throughout Inkopolis  gathered at the humble Knifefish Shrine for Older Days Fest. Unknowingly, they rubbed shoulders with their invisible poltergeist neighbors who were assembling for their most beloved holiday of all, Yo-Fest.

Paper lanterns and fiery torches decorated the shrine, a clash of old-fashioned aesthetics against the modern trucks and carnival rides a mere walking distance away. Acting as a makeshift stage, everyone turned to the main pavilion as Lyra stepped forward to address the crowd.

“Welcome one and all.” She spoke into a microphone that amplified her voice into speakers arranged around the main hall. “Thank you for coming to Inkopolis’s annual Olden Days Festival. Now, Olden Days as we know it is a celebration of our city’s long and wonderful cultural heritage. From the very first settlers who came from the east, our history is rich with the stories of many different species but there is another side to today’s celebration.”  

The head priestess extended her arms outward, elaborating further. “Today we honor the spirits that coexist in our world and impact our lives in ways we can’t possibly imagine. Whether they be the souls of the dearly departed or even the spirits of the smallest pebbles beneath our feet, tonight is the night to remember our connection to the world that neighbors our own.”

With that, her subordinates and even Lee filed in with the prepared bamboo. One by one they settled down plates, bowls, and baskets filled with prepared meals in front of main hall. As they did, Lyra continued with her address. “To guide and appease the spirits we offer this sacrifice of bamboo as a testament the longevity of our union to each other.”

Spirits? Neighboring world? Sacrifice offering? To many in the crowd she was speaking utter mumbo jumbo, old-age religious nonsense that they boredly awaited her to finish. Onlookers in the crowd thought the priestess to be crazy as they watched her look to her side and hold out an open hand to nothing.

Of course, those like Lee and Kaitlyn could see that she wasn’t reaching out to nothing. Leakina had been standing beside her the entire time and when Lyra stretched out her hand, the watery wraith silently but tenderly rested her hand in the young woman’s palm. Only they could see the two turn to each other as Lyra enthusiastically stated, “As head priestess of Knifefish Shrine I declare Olden Days started!”

The crowd dispersed and the festivities went into full swing with Lee joining the collection of hundreds of mortals and yokai with Guist and Juddinyan at his side. Over the music and merriment, they finally had a chance to inform their friend of what had happened after the battle with Goredinator.

“The king-dude was seriously cheesed off about the whole thing, he was totally about to blow his lid but then we reminded him that it was almost time for Yo-Fest.”

Juddinyan added, “He was meowly excited bout the bamboo feast.”

“But not nearly as hyped as getting to see his Pops like he said.” Guist let out a laugh as he bobbed in the air. “How d’ya like that Cus, Yo-Fest totally saved our bacon!”

Lee could help but join them in chuckling at such happenstance. “Heh-eh, you know what, I do like that.”

Even though he did laugh, Lee couldn’t help but dwell on that thought about King Inkma and his pops. He had wondered this entire time what was Yo-Fest all about and he was starting to figure out what.

Yokai as he knew them always caused trouble for mortal creatures. It was in their nature to cause mischief yet all around him he saw them calmly hovering over them. From families to single visitors, some had yokai that stuck to them like glue, even if they couldn’t be seen. Those visiting the nearby cemetery  were a sight to see.

The young Inkling had a strong feeling he knew why and he suspected it had to do with what Lyra said about the unity and harmony between yokai and mortals. As joyous as it was to see all kinds mingling together, and for him to be back with his best pals there was a longing in Lee’s heart that he couldn’t shake. It was something that seeing all of this made him yearn for even harder.

“Lee! Lee! Oh Honey, there you are!”

Was his mind playing tricks on him? That voice he heard, it couldn’t have been who he thought it was? He focused forward, searching through the crowd. There was; waving her hand above the crowd, eyes twinkling with delight as they spotted each other.

“MOM!” Lee nearly screamed. He took off, dashing the short distance into a waiting hug.

Squeezing her son with all her strength, Janine happily greeted him. “Ohh Sweetie, even though it was only a week, I missed you so much.”

“I missed you too Mom.” His grip around her did not loosen, even as hers did.

“Everything here looks great,” she said, finally managing to peel him away. “Of course it would be with you helping out.” He modestly shrugged his shoulders, unable to take the praise knowing all of the preparations weren’t his doing. His thoughts were shaken by her brushing his tentacles out of his face and dusting the front of his robe. “That yukata makes you look so handsome, is it really handmade?” She continued inquiring.  “Did you have a good time while you were here? I bet you're itchin' to come home, huh?”

Honestly? “I had a great time!” That wasn’t untrue but he decided it would be best to omit all the details about his numerous brushes with death, and going to a parallel dimension. “Actually,” Lee added, “Could I stay one more day? Just to help clean up when the festival is over and hang out with my friends a little more?”

Janine's face gleamed with a shining smile as she replied, “Of course Honey. I'll swing by and pick you up tomorrow, but before that I brought a nice picnic dinner for us.” In his excitement, Lee didn’t notice the wicker basket cradled in the crook of her arm until she slid it into his grasp.  

Gingerly opening the basket, he let out a dramatic gasp upon inspecting its contents. “Haa-- heh-- h'oh my stars,” he stuttered. “Salmon Bagel sandwiches, mom’s macaroni & cheese, and-- and--,” he was too taken in by one other thing to pay attention to the plastic container of steamed greens. “I-is that chocolate cake?”

Janine anticipated he would be fonnd of that as she clarified, “Baked it this afternoon. I even brought your favorite ice cream too.”

Hearing that couldn't stop his lips from quivering and his eyes from watering. After a week of delivered dinners and gas station ramen, one of his mom's home cooked meals was like a gift from heaven. “Ara ara,” she giggled, “I’ll be right back with it, I left it in a cooler in the car. We'll find a nice place to eat and you can tell me all about this week. Love you, Sweetie.”

“Hiff, love you too Mom.” Lee tried his best to control his sniffling, unable to believe he was so emotional over food.

As she walked out of sight, Leakina hovered over with a look of awe on her face. “Whoa, is that your Mom, Leeker? Good choice, you picked a real pretty one.”  

Her inquisition made Lee chuckle. “Heh-eh, I didn’t choose my mom.”

“Really?” Leakina wondered. “I did. Yokai pick their own families and speaking of which, my sisters are coming right now.”

“Your what?” Lee repeated.

Right before their eyes, he watched as a bevy of yokai that looked just like Leakina rise out of drinking cups strewn about the festival area. His eyes darted all around as he watched  them appear. There was a pink Leakina, then white, orange, and finally cola colored one that appeared before them.

“THERE'S MORE OF THEM?!” One was more than enough. And the prospect of several Leakinas made Lee scream. “AHHHHHHHH!” He ran in the opposite direction but not before reflexively hurling the picnic basket up in the air.

It was safely caught by Leakina who curiously asked Guist and Juddinyan. “What's wrong with him?” Their answer was an unknowing shrug of their shoulders.

The rest of the night went on without a hitch for mortals and yokai alike with fun, food, and frolics. It was soon time for the midnight fireworks. Janine had already gone home to Shee-Booyah for the night , leaving Lee to his devices at the shrine. He exited the main hall after setting his phone down to charge only to have Guist spiral in front of his face. “Sup Cus! Peep this, the whole crew is here to watch the fireworks tonight with us!” There on the stoop was Juddinyan laying on his back, Leakina, and surprisingly Kakkonyan and Wanderzan to.

“Hiiii-nyah,” Kakkonyan waved a candied apple he held in his paw.

Meanwhile, Wanderzan coolly greeted, “Sup Homie.”

Lee grinned, “Heh-eh, glad you guys could make it!”

As he sat down, Guist eagerly danced about in the air. “Woo-hoo, this is gonna be the raddest, most excellent thing ever! I never saw fireworks before.”

As the pint sized spirit babbled, Lee felt a nudging at his arm. Leakina offered a candied apple, whispering, “Psst. I snagged the last one of these for you Leeker. If I didn’t then the fur ball would have gotten them all.” Upon closer inspection, Juddinyan was soundly sleeping with a satisfied smile on his face, holding his swelled belly with four discarded sticks at his side.

“Hey thanks,” appreciating the gesture with a nibble on the sweet, crunchy treat, Lee took a seat on the wooden veranda. It felt so oddly quiet despite all of the activity going on at the festival grounds. To Lee, this silent stillness was a reprieve from the craziness he had endured the entire week. However  what should have been relaxing was blanketed by a sudden strange feeling though.

The unnerved boy caught Leakina sitting beside him out of the corner of his vision, and she was oddly staring at him.

“What?” He asked curiously?

She swiftly answered, “Oh nothing, nothing.” After a momentary pause she added, “It's just pretty amazing how you came through for everybody and saved Yo-Fest.” Lee could only throw her an unsure look so she elaborated further. “You helped out Lyra, all those bad guys who gave us a hard time, and you kicked that big red jerk's butt!”

Ever modest, Lee replied with a shake of his head. “I didn’t really do a whole lot, you guys are the ones who did all the heavy lifting.”  

That answer made Leakina tap her fists against her hips and grimace at him. "Well Mr. Modesty,” she snapped back, “If there’s one person you did a lot for its me.”  

“What?” He muttered.

“Yeah, I mean look at me now; I’ve got my own home to haunt, I got a job, and I even got a girlfriend!” Leakina proudly proclaimed all of the things she had achieved.

“Girlfriend?” Lee repeated with keen interest.

There was a moment of backpedaling. “Well-- Lyra’s not quite there yet with the whole idea but she’ll come around. Why wouldn’t she? Who could say no to all this?” She made a gesture of presenting herself, the act of which made Lee unable to keep from eyeing her with a scoffing smirk.  

Once she finished, she returned to the main topic.  “Don’t even try to deny it.” The watery woman leaned toward him, her weight on one arm. “You did a lot for me, and it means a lot that you did,  so thanks for everything Leeker.”

That genuine appreciative tone in her voice; it seemed as though she really meant what she said. All he had to do was give a simple “you’re welcome” but instead it came out as a nervous stutter. “W-well, it wasn’t anything really, ee—really I--,” he was then left at a complete loss for words. He felt a gentle, damp sensation on his skin as Leakina leaned in to give her hero a kiss of gratitude on his cheek.

Though he was stunned by that act, he was somehow able to find the words he was looking for. “Gosh Leakina, it was nothing, really, but uhh, watch where you're putting that water bottle.”

“What water bottle?” She asked with a sheepish grin, pulling her hand away and discreetly trying to hide a leaking bottle of water.

That battle ended before it began; segued by a series of explosions signifying the beginning of the long-awaited fireworks show. Guist gave a roar of a cheer as he pumped and wiggled his pale tentacles with so much excitement, almost stealing the show himself.

As Lee reclined back on one arm, he found his mind wandering as he really took in everything around him. To one side he could see Kakkonyan circling his arm around the shoulder of a glaring Wanderzan. On the other side was Juddinyan, wearing away the time in a peaceful, gluttonous slumber. Above him was Guist who served as a beacon of wonder and excitement as he fluttered about with so much earnest joy in his heart. Finally, right beside him was Leakina; someone he had endured variably endless, cruel bullying and humiliation from. Now, according to her he completely changed her afterlife around for the better.

He had heard a mantra once before; “When a Yokai enters your life, it will never be the same ever again.” For Lee he didn’t want to fathom what life would be like without the friends he had right here, the friends he was glad to stay with forever.

[thequeenofcronuts]

Secret Santas Part 2

Four Part Series

Catch up! Part 1

Choices: THe Royal Romance

Characters: TRR Gang (MC is Kristina, horse is Enchanting Fate

Type: Fun Fluff, Christmas Related, Game

Word Count: 1,854

A/N: In this four Part series play along with the TRR Gang and see if you can guess who their Secret Santa is along side them.

Pixelberry Studios owns these characters, I just have fun with them.

—————————————

Friday morning Liam makes his way into his office. Opening the door he sees a festively wrapped box on his desk. An excited grin crosses his face. Liam studies the gift before picking it up. The wrapping paper is exquisite, but there wasn't a ribbon or bow, it’s just elegant. A card type and printed out is addressed to him from “Your Secret Santa”. Already Liam was enjoying the mystery. What would it be and from whom. He gently picks up the box and feels its moderate weight. Not really getting any clues, he opens the gift to find a gorgeous bocote wood and bubinga wood chess set. It's obvious that this chess pieces are hand carved and the board is beautifully inlaid wood.

He immediately sees that the Cordonian Crest has be carved into the middle of the board. When he picks up a piece and turns it in his hands to admire the craftsmanship he sees that the bottom of the piece has also been carved with the Cordonian Crest. The same is true for all the pieces. Liam sits down in his chair and looks at the set which is a work of art its own right. He imagines a game with one of the guys as he has a glass of scotch. He thinks that maybe it won't be too hard to figure out his Secret Santa.

—————————————

Kristina has had a very, very long Friday. She’s extremely tired, and wants a glass of wine and her husband. As she walks down a long hall to her and Liam's royal apartment, she sees something on the floor at the front door. With caution she begins to move forward to see a plain green wrapped present with a bright red bow. She looks to the guard who nods as if to say it's safe. She picks up the gift and reads the tag which is in handwriting she doesn't recognize, which simply reads, “Your Secret Santa”. She had been focusing on her hectic week and finding the perfect gift for her secret Santa gift she hadn't even realized that she didn't receive her gift yet.

She takes the square box, which fits in her hands, into the apartment and excitedly sits on the couch. Not one to contemplate the whole “What could be inside thing” or “How the person wrapped the gift” she rips it open. She finds a beautiful blue leather box that is obviously for jewelry. This just keeps getting better, she thinks. She opens the box to see a striking vintage Art Deco Hamilton cocktail watch. The white gold is as bright as the day it had been originally purchased. The beautiful bracelet band rested at the top and the base of the unique and distinctly Art Deco square watch face. Where the band and face of the watch met, there were three delicate scrolls of white gold each with a round diamond in the center. Kristina couldn't take her eyes off it. Finally she see a note in the box, “A vintage working watch from a renowned American watch maker given to the new Cordonian-American.” She simply cannot wait for the next Christmas event.

—————————————

Hana had been waiting for her gift form her Secret Santa all week. She loves this time of year and every aspect of it. She loves giving more than receiving, but this game is too much fun not to get into. Since it's Christmastime she was more than happy to accept Kristina's invitation to stay at the palace so Hana wouldn’t have to travel between there and Valtoria for all the holiday events. It was late in evening that Friday night when she hears her phone ping. She looks at the screen and the message is from “Secret Santa” telling her to look outside her door. She cracks her door to see a package in gold glittering wrapping paper with a matching gold glittered ribbon and bow. She cannot contain her excitement, and picks up the gift bouncing her way to her bed.

Leaping onto the bed she places the gift down and studies it. Every side, every bit of ribbon and bow. She notices the seams meet perfectly and how the tape is virtually invisible. She really doesn't garner any other information or clues from her assessment. Either one of the ladies wrapped it, or one of the guys had it wrapped for them. If it was one of the guys, she wasn't sure that Drake would pick the wrapping even if he didn't have to wrap it. Of course, she knows every aspect of the wrapping and the gifts she will receive tell which friend is her Secret Santa. Hana never guesses, she figures out all puzzles.

She opens the gift so delicately, really only the way that could be done by Hana. After unwrapping and opening the box she sees matching glittering gold tissue paper as the wrapping. She thinks to herself if this is one of the guys they obviously had a lot of help, or is an extremely thoughtful person. Once she pulls back the tissue paper she knows from one glance she loves it. She pulls out a shimmering gold tee length, A-line dress. The sleeves are three quarter length and the neckline is a perfect V-Line. It was designed by the Parisian designer Lancelin St. Claire! She tries it on, and it fits perfectly. The bodice is slightly formfitting, but just right for Hana tastes. She feels like she just stepped off the screen of a 1950’s movie, and she adores it! It’s a beautiful, tasteful dress which is perfect for the holiday season.

—————————————

Drake is heading out to the stables to check on the temperature for the horses, and checks in on Kristina's Enchanting Fate. Out of the corner of his of his eye he sees a large, but not skinny, long box wrapped simply in brown paper and tied with twine. He goes over to it and takes it out of the stall and sees written directly on the paper of the package, “From your Secret Santa”. Drake knows the writing, it's Leo’s. Leo has come for a holiday visit and he seems to have gotten himself roped into some Secret Santa’s antics. It's too obvious for it to be Liam. He guesses it could be Hana, she would know the perfect way to wrap a gift that fits his personality. He stops, and thinks to himself what the hell is he even doing. I’m not at all interested in this crazy Maxwell FriendFest or whatever this thing is. He goes on to do what he came to the stable to do.

Before he leaves he sees the box and can't help remember his birthday at the western themed bar with his friends. He still kinds hates admitting it, but it was nice to have them to celebrate things with. He sighs and goes to the box. The twine is tied in a plain old bow that he easily undoes. He unwraps the gift to see another “Leo note” taped to the top of the box which has written “Brown paper packages tied up with string, here's something new for your favorite things.” He opens up the box and sees a brand new fishing rod, line, a full tackle box, and a set of fishing tools. All top of the line quality. This is the nicest fishing equipment he's ever owned, and the gift wasn't whisky, so someone really took the time to figure this all out.

—————————————

Olivia received a note from her Secret Santa to be at the boutique at 4pm. She saunters in at the appropriate time only to find it empty. She waits for fifteen minutes, which was fifteen more minutes than she intended to. Oh, real funny Secret Santa, she mutters out loud. As she turns to leave something near the changing rooms catches her eye. She walks over to the red package with a black bow and sees on it, “Yours truly. Secret Santa.” She thought it would be smaller. This is too big for jewelry. It's the size of a shoe box. She rips the paper and opens the box to find a ton of tissue paper. So much that while she pulling it all out she almost missed the red velvet pouch. This is more like it she thinks to herself. She opens the pouch to find a bracelet with the most brilliant black and red stones. The bracelet is an intricate horizontal sword. Engraving on the back reads, “Never underestimate the power of Olivia, fools.” The clasp is easy and she as the bracelet on immediately. Her face is absolutely beaming, until she steps out of the boutique composing herself.

Walking down the hall she is amazed that her Secret Santa actually did a semi decent job. Ok, she admits only to herself, they actually did a damn good job. Definitely someone who knows her well, isn't a screwup, and has taste almost as good as her own. She looks at the tip of the blade of the sword as she admires the bracelet again. Hmm, this is actually sharp, I can use this as a weapon and a piece of jewelry. She smirks as she continues down the hall.

—————————————

It’s late and Maxwell needs a snack. Everyone knows, of course, that his go to late night snack is ice cream. Mainly because he tells everyone. When he gets to the palace kitchen and moves toward the freezer he sees an eight and a half by eleven envelope taped to its door. On it is purposefully written chicken scratch which simply reads, “Maxwell - S.S.” Maxwell is now completely fired up. He snatches it and opens it as fast as he can. He pulls out all sorts of paperwork and some pictures which he can't look quick enough. He reads all the pamphlets, certificates, and looks at each picture.

He can't even begin to contain himself and yelling at the top of his lungs, “BEST.SECRET.SANTA.GIFT.EVER.” He looks at the certificates again, each one reading the same way, “We thank you for your love of one of the world’s most amazing creatures, the hippopotamus. We are delighted to let you know that a hippopotamus has been adopted in your name and will be protected by the support of you and others like you.” Each certificate has a different name for a different hippo, five in total. Maxwell scoops all of it up while he runs yelling, “My Secret Santa is on Point!!” He stops running, spins around, and goes back for his ice cream, then heads out with a bounce in his step.

—————————————

Next week, Part 3 is the second week of gift giving. Do you, dear readers, have any guesses as to whose Secret Santa is whose yet?

Go to Part 3 here!

—————————————

Series Tag: @jyreusser85

[bangtan-spells]

Namjoon Scenario: My Secret Santa.

Request: very busy CEO Namjoon who focus only work Y/N  is secretary who has a crush on him. Despite he let everyone takes break and enjoy holidays,he stay late to work and stress. So you take holidays opportunity to cheer him up,give him gift anonymously from dec 1st til Christmas Day. After he received present he seems less stress. Namjoon caught u left him his present one morning n happy that secret admire was u. So he surprised u on Christmas Eve to ask u out for a date on Christmas Day❤️❤️❤️            

Genre: Fluff

Your boss was about to arrive, you knew his schedule, his times and whatnot and it was a little crazy how used you were already to him, but well you supposed that being his secretary had a lot to do with that, having the biggest crush on him too. You giggled to yourself while sneaking into his office, sometimes you felt like a teenager in front of him, Namjoon was just so handsome and he got your heart rushing everytime.

You had to be quick with this, so you left the small and shiny red bag in the center of his desk so there was no way he would miss it and then went back to your own desk satisfied.

It was just a little present since today was the first day of December and he deserved it more than anyone, you knew he wasn’t that big in sweet things but you had gotten some fancy liquor infused chocolates and what better way of starting the holiday season with some festive chocolate?

You looked at the hour when you heard him arrive and busied yourself with some documents.

-Y/N, good morning- he said while walking past your desk with a side smile and you smiled back like a total lovestruck, hoping it didn’t show on your face.

-Good morning Mr. Kim- he laughed and went by, sometimes you used the honorific but he’d told you already you could call him simply Namjoon and it would still be alright.

You waited for a bit, excited and in silence until Namjoon was peeking out of his office.

-Y/N?- he asked and you turned to look at him.

-Yes?-

-Has anybody been in my office? - he looked confused and you laughed internally,your gift had a little card but it only said “enjoy the start of the holidays” and nothing else, it didn’t even said something about you being the one giving it to him.

-I haven’t really noticed, why?-

He smiled widely, his dimples showing in full display. -I got a present-

-Good for you boss, what is it?-

He opened it in front of you and he looked delighted, so you were happy for having that small detail with him, now you were going to do it every day if you were going to get him looking at you with that excitement in his eyes.

Namjoon was thoughtful, tapping his pen against his lips and moving side to side on his chair.

-What is it?- you asked softly and he focused on you, you had been helping him with some paperwork on his desk and he shook his head.

-Nothing I just…- he smiled, shrugging. -I think someone is really out to make my Christmas these days-

You smiled softly at that and Namjoon had to remember himself not to stare.

-Maybe that person is just grateful and wants to make you smile- you looked at him with your face on your chin. -You have been really good giving everybody breaks and days off for the holidays but you always stay here-

-Well someone’s got to do the work- he laughed out loud, lacing his hands over his stomach. -You have stayed here too Y/N, you’re the only one who hasn’t asked for a day off yet-

You shrugged. -I don’t really need it yet-

-But know that you can have it too alright? it’ll be hard without you but I’ll try to manage-

-You’ll try? That doesn’t sound too encouraging-

Both of you laughed at the comment and then fell into a comfortable silence.

-I feel like you know who this person is and you just don’t want to tell me- he accused you and you just laughed, denying with your head.

-I don’t… but why are you so eager to know? Don’t you like having an admirer?-

You laughed again and Namjoon couldn’t help but do so.

-No it’s not that, I don’t know, I’m just curious it has nothing to do with receiving the gifts-

-So you actually do like them- you stated with a smirk and he felt the need to pick on you right then, but that wouldn't be that professional right?

The thing with you was that you were the most efficient at work, always diligent and on time for everything but at the same time you messed with him, you treated him close and Namjoon liked that about you because then he could let go a little with you.

-It’s sweet I guess- he said with a shrug, he definitely suspected there was something you knew since you were always of the first people to arrive at the office everyday and if there was someone sneaking to his desk you should know who this person was. -Anyway I have kept you through the whole lunchtime Y/N, I’m sorry I didn’t notice-

He remarked after taking a look at his watch and you did the same.

-Oh I didn’t notice neither…-

-Let me order something for you to eat, what do you want?- he asked while taking his phone to order something for both of you.

Your relationship with your boss was mostly platonic, you were certain about that but you also noticed how he looked at you sometimes, how he had little details with you that could go unnoticed to someone else but not for you, he was a caring man and you were too gone, too into him and with each new gift you left at his desk you could notice his mood lighting up, he seemed less stressed and way happier, he would often come to your desk to show off what he’d gotten and comment on it with you.

It was actually so much fun whenever he did that, you were able to admire his true reaction and feels about your gifts and that was just so good you were growing addicted on the feeling of complicity with him.

It was going to be Christmas Eve tomorrow and you were still debating on what to get him for Christmas, if that slick silk tie you had seen that reminded you of him, or something more exciting.

You sighed, opening the office doors and checking there was no one else around, this time you had a blue bag with you containing Namjoon’s favorite brand of coffee, so you went to his desk and closed the door behind you just in case.

Namjoon supresed a smile and made his way back outside carefully and fast, to give you enough time to do whatever you had to. It was so satisfying to know the one leaving gifts to him was you, it got him so excited out of nowhere. He laughed to himself because he’d seen you walking to his office with the gift bag and somehow he had to have known this was something so you to pull off and he was glad he had chosen to go to the office earlier that day.

He decided to wait for about ten minutes before going back inside, he greeted you like usual knowing the secret that you kept and made his way to his office. As every other day your gift was placed at the center of his desk, the same blue bag he’d seen in your hands so he did the same he had been doing and took the gift to open it with you, now that this time it would be so much rewarding than the previous ones.

-Oh Y/N let’s see what I got today, shall we?- he smiled and rested his hip against your desk, you eyes were attentive on him and he took out the content, a selection of his favorite coffee, of course you’d know that. -This person must know me so well, I love this thing-

You laughed at that and nodded. -You’re a lucky man boss-

-You really think that? - you nodded at his question and smiled. -Well I just hope I get the chance to make the same thing for this person, since they are taking so much time and thought into these gifts-

-And what would you do?- you asked curiously and he moved away from your desk.

-I guess that would be a surprise for when I find out who this person is- he smiled and went back to his own desk.

Today was Christmas Eve and you had to make some time for work, Namjoon had been overworking himself and you offered to help him that day since you were going to have Christmas day free anyway, when you reached the office he was already waiting for you and you worked for a while until sunset when you were finally done with all the extra work and taking sips from your coffees.

-I have something for you- Namjoon said, taking out a pretty little box from one of his drawers, it was obviously a gift and your heart raced. He gave it to you with a big smile and you laughed.

-You didn’t have to do this Namjoon…- you were dying to open it but he stopped you.

-Save it for tomorrow-

-Why?-

He shrugged. -Because you’re supposed to open the gift in Christmas of course, even if I have been opening your gifts since December started - he said simply.

You giggled a little shy now, you didn’t even wanted to know how he found out about your gifts but you weren’t about to deny them.

-I hope you liked them- you said softly and he moved closer to you

-I did, and I liked them even more after knowing they came from you Y/N- he was looking at you in a way that made your heart race even more. -So thank you, it was truly special-

You were madly giggling by then, if Namjoon wanted to make you feel all flustered and floaty, he was achieving it.

He was closer, looking down at you with that smirk of his that you loved and you hoped you weren’t turning any color.

-I really want to see your reaction when you open my gift, and I really, really want to spend tomorrow with you, so… would you mind spending Christmas with me? We can do something together, if you feel like-

You had never felt more like it as in that moment, so you nodded enthusiastically, already excited by the idea of a date with him.

-So you’ll be my Christmas date?- he laughed biting in his lips and nodding.

-We’ll be each other’s Christmas date and I think that’s pretty exciting-

You both smiled in complicity and eager to know what tomorrow could bring to you.

[anotherdayinchuckletown]

Happy Halloween, Mr. Wonka!

(A/N: Hello, and Happy Halloween!! Now, Halloween is my favorite holiday, so y’all know I had to whip up a little something for my favorite muse who definitely hates this day with a passion! Full disclosure, this was drafted, written, and edited all in the span of about two hours, so I’m a tad self-conscious… But hey, I was on time! I wanted to give y’all something festive, even if it’s my saddest Wonka piece so far.

Thank you so much for reading, and have an amazing (and safe) Halloween!

-Katherine <3)

_________________

Heavy machinery whirs quietly all around. Some gadgets emit soft clouds of vapor, which float listlessly toward the high ceilings of the Inventing Room like restless spirits. Phosphorescent light filters through the haze, making long shadows dance in the corners of the room. Since the sun has already gone down and factory operation hours are over, the Oompa-Loompas are absent, meaning that there is no music, no dancing—only the droning hum of technology.

An eerie combination, indeed, thinks Wonka sourly. Such a nuisance.

Charlie is preparing to leave for his annual trick-or-treating expedition, and when he asked earlier if Wonka would join him, Wonka had excused himself. I just need to tie up a few loose ends in the Inventing Room, he had claimed, pointedly ignoring his teenage ward’s crestfallen expression. You go and enjoy yourself, Charlie. A boy your age shouldn’t be stuck working on Halloween, of all nights!

The Halloween season is always a busy one for the factory. That much should be obvious, given the long-standing tradition of trick-or-treating. A tradition which allows even kids who normally have nothing to indulge in an overabundance of candy for one glorious night. A tradition which Wonka himself took part in as a child, in his family’s own unique way…

His gloved hands twitch, and he remembers what he is supposed to be doing. Well, pretending to be doing, really. He reaches for the spoon to his right, and stirs the mixture before him with more force than necessary.

The tradition of trick-or-treating expressly demands candy production be at an all-time high for the year. He has already met his surplus production goal, and the sales numbers reflect that this is a wise investment. Things are truly going swimmingly. All things considered, he thinks he should be in a great mood. He should be kicking back and relaxing, instead of throwing together this…whatever this is, just so that he has something to keep his hands and mind occupied with anything but Halloween.

“Milk powder…where is the milk powder?” he mutters to himself as he scans his table of various ingredients.

“Here it is, Mr. Wonka.”

Not expecting any sort of response, Wonka lets out an embarrassingly shrill scream. Brandishing his cane and spinning on his heel toward the source of the voice, he comes face to face with…Eliza Weber, his assistant.

Free hand clutching at his heart, which is now racing faster than a hummingbird’s, Wonka desperately attempts to get his breathing under control. He lowers the cane warily, leveling the young woman and the container of milk powder she offers him with a scowl. Finally, he stretches out his arm and snatches it from her.

The whole time, she has the audacity, the absolute gall, to look completely unaffected by his outburst. “I apologize if I startled you. I did knock.”

Eliza is not only Wonka’s assistant, but she is also Charlie’s teacher. She has only been a part of factory life for a few months, but has already proven herself to be his finest employee. Some of it can be attributed to her height advantage over the Oompa-Loompas, although she is exceedingly petite herself. She is wildly intelligent, adept in mechanical design, and regimented as all get out. In addition, her loyalty and perseverance are unmatched, to the point where it’s a bit unsettling.

“Were you planning to use your cane as a weapon just then?”

Her ability to get on his nerves at times is also unmatched.

He takes in her costume, consisting of a hooped skirt with an apron, tightly-buttoned corset, and short lace gloves. Her hair is pinned into a neat bun at the nape of her neck. “And what are you supposed to be, Nanny McPhee?” he retorts.

“Mary Poppins,” she corrects him, the insult either sailing right over her head or not bothering her in the slightest. “Charlie invited me to go trick-or-treating with him. I’ve never been, so I agreed.”

Wonka sets the powdered milk down hard enough that some of it puffs up and over the sides of the bowl, coating his gloves in the white substance. “Well, isn’t that just peachy!” The smile that accompanies his statement is too pinched, even by his standards.

“Incidentally, that’s why I’m here,” she continues. “He requested I tell you that we’re leaving shortly, and it’s your last chance to join us.”

He lets out a long sigh,  summoning up all the patience he can. “Goodness, I certainly would love to, I’m just so gosh darn busy!” He gestures to the mess on the table behind him. “You know how it is this time of year. You two go on without me, have fun!”

Eliza scrutinizes him. “You seem tense. Do you not want to go because you don’t have a costume?”

Wonka simply squints at her, confused.

“I have a contingency plan, meaning I can throw something together for you in a matter of minutes. Your facial structure bears a striking resemblance to Johnny Depp’s Edward Scissorhands.”

“It does not!” He pouts, not appreciating her sneaking up on him and making wildly inaccurate comments about his facial structure. If he bears a resemblance to any Johnny Depp character, it’s Sweeney Todd, for goodness sake!

She looks at him like he’s taken the wind out of her sails, a small victory. “Very well. I will let Charlie know that you’re busy.”

She starts to leave, and Wonka visibly relaxes, turning away. Except she lingers at the door, and he can feel those eyes on him. Those big, glassy eyes that seem to pierce through him, all-knowing, like a particularly astute goldfish.

“Permission to speak freely?” she asks suddenly.

“Denied!” he responds right on the heels of her question. He is treated to a few moments of feeling the irritation radiate off of her before curiosity gets the better of him. “…What is it?” he asks weakly.

“According to my data,” she explains, “sales are much higher than normal, but it’s nothing to warrant the rate at which you’ve been working the last few days.”

Of course, the woman who handles his accounting would call him out on his lie.

“Therefore, I can only assume this has to do with some sort of personal aversion.”

Wonka feels his skin prickle. Facing her once more, he asks, “What is your point?” The question comes out even colder than he meant it to.

Eliza at least has the decency to shuffle nervously, breaking eye contact in favor of watching the vapor circling up toward the ceiling. “My point is…at the risk of breaching the parameters of my job description…I am a very good listener as well.”

Leave it to Eliza to choose the worst possible time to display some emotional intelligence for a change. The chocolatier stares at her long and hard, choosing his words carefully. “Eliza…why have you never been trick-or-treating before?”

She looks justifiably taken aback. Tilting her head, she says, “My foster parents never allowed it. They believed Halloween was…Satanic.” Wonka nearly blinks and misses the subtle roll of her eyes at the notion.

Wonka thinks that there’s something to be said for her never knowing what she’s missing out on as a kid. Never having that false hope that this year, things will be different. Still, he latches on to his opportunity.

“Well, they’re not here to stop you now, are they?” He grins at her in a way that he hopes is reassuring and not as melancholic as it feels, even though his face is starting to hurt from smiling so much. “Yet, here you are, worrying about me instead, silly! You just take Charlie and get out there, okay?”

Looking anything but convinced, Eliza blinks slowly. “…Okay. I’ll see you tomorrow, Mr. Wonka.”

Satisfied that she will actually leave this time, he turns his back to her again. He does not answer her, nor does he let his expression drop until he finally hears the sound of heels clicking farther and farther down the hall.

Wonka has had his day in the sun. Or, would it be his night in the moon? At any rate, he no longer has need to go trick-or-treating. No need to celebrate the ridiculous holiday at all, for that matter.

He’s all right with that. Sincerely, he is.

Now, to get rid of that mixture he had been working on. He won’t bother tasting it—he can already smell how it is disgustingly, revoltingly, irreparably bitter.

[juliajoybell]

Home for the Holidays

Today a bit later than usual, my review about the Christmas Special !

This is just happened in * Murdoch Mysteries *  

. The Murdochs  are travelling . 

I like the idea to let William and Julia having a trip, “let’s go for an adventure. “

My God, six days to cross the country… 

. Oh yes Brack too good to be true. 

Things I have learn in life : When it’s an “easy money”, it’s too good to be real. It’s a bit like magic “ Magic always has a price “ ( I’m lot into quotes it seams today, this one is from “Once Upon a Time” ) 

.  William knows  how to make Julia happy . 

I need someone like this man, seriously, he is super cute with his wife and what a gift he makes to her, too bad the family ruined it. 

. Jasper and Daphné .

I am soooo glad to see William’s brother back. I am a bit less with his wife Daphné and these children? Oh poor Julia, no champagne for you my Dear. 

Kate Hewlett is Daphné Linney. I knew her from Stargate Atlantis, she is so cool ! Daphné definitely less… 

. Ruth is still dating Higgins . 

They are cute together and I am glad they are both in this Special. And Higgins didn’t always wanted to improve his life? Now he sees what is like to try to satisfied a true Lady ;) 

.Ruth and Nina are friends.

I have to say they are so funny together 

. Still want children Julia ? .

Oh Rudolphina and Georgina  are two little devils and sure makes you regret to want children… 

. Mrs B. obsess with money .

Nothing new here. 

. Julia doesn’t like family .

I have the feeling there is a bit of the Grinch in Dr. Julia Ogden. A perfect christmas for her sounds more like; staying in bed, William, only a dinner with civilized people and champagne… We can”t blame her ;) 

But if I found her more into the chrismas spirit in the two first movies, I must say in this one she is not really into it. For me she is the kind of people that doesn’t really hate christmas, but whom are not happy to endure all the festivities…especially family! Who never wish to not spend time with one of their relatives and the endless dinners… 

- Dr Julia Ogden .

- Pleased . * Absolutely don’t care * 

I have laught because yes, this is happened to everybody once in a lifetime ;) 

. Megan Follow . 

If you don’t know her it’s perhaps because you haven’t watch enough Canadian shows. She is awesome. Go check her work. That’ all. 

. The place is beautiful on Vancouver Island .

I’ve planned to visit the Canadian West Coast in 2019. This movie confirmed my decision to do it. These landscaps are breathtaking! I’m glad to see them outside of Toronto and particulary this year they found beautiful spots. 

. Ho-ho-ho a corpse .

It’s not Murdoch Mysteries without a corpse. 

. Yes skiing is stupid I agree with you George . 

For the record, I have never skiing in my life, and I’m not really ready to try. I dislike snow, I dislike cold and spending my whole day to go up and down of a mountain with cols feet, is clearly not something I would do, add the fact I’m clumsy and I will probably be more on the ground than on my feet…. so yes George, I understand you. 

. Nina and Ruth BFF . 

George and Henry are friends, Ruth and Nina are friends…. 

. Oh william you have to save Julia . 

William is her hero, especially when he saves her from spending time with his family. 

. It doesn’t sound good for the Brackenreid I mean this is a new lifestyle….

I see the troubles coming about the Brakenreids spending their money without thinking. 

. William’s snowflake . 

That’s our William. 

. Oh no Higgins .

Oh poor Higgins, I felt so sorry for him. Actually I felt sorry right after I laught out loud. 

. At least William and Julia are living in a hotel . 

And they are together , that’s the matter right ? It’s just a less luxuary. 

. I like the (sad ) historical facts . 

Because it’s true, but it”s a part of the History they enlight and that is great.It’s sad too, unfortunetly each country has its dark side. 

. Auntie Julia is the best . 

Aaaw I knew Julia will be a great aunt. She is always great with children. It took time, but these two little girls became her friends. 

. Oh George telling lies . 

We see he is good at telling stories. Ou pas. 

. Brothers time . 

William and Jasper reunited in the woods was a good moment. I truly liked that scene. 

. Indiana Julia . 

SHE IS BAAAACK in pants “Let’s go for an adventure “ indeed. 

. Oh miss cherry ? . 

I didn’t see Miss Cherry coming back. I’m not sure how I feel about her. I was glad to see her tho. 

. Ruth is awesome . 

Don’t you never see that Newsome is close to “Awesome”? That she is Ruth. 

. William’s humour about jasper children . 

I’m glad Julia’s humour became a bit of William’s humour. Because the joke about the children in the woods was fun. 

. Robert Carli is playing jiggles bells it the cabaret .

Just in case you missed it ;) 

. Brack the bear . 

When Bracks fight, he fight for the win. He is the Lion King of the Station Four, but honestly he is a Teddy Bear too. And we love him for that. 

. Daphné’s story. 

I knew there were something behind the characer of Daphné. I believe a lot of women at that time turned like that. And sometimes it’s sad to see it’s still happens today. I like how Julia speaks with her. And I like how the story of Daphné is the opposite of the Indians women that was actualy the Chef behind the men of the band. How in a same country people considered as “ Civilized” shout down women voices, as if they were men property, (even if it wasn’t the case from Jasper), and in front of that the people from this native land were totally the opposite. I found that great to show us that, that way. 

. Oh Thomas . 

There is any Murdoch Mysteries episode without Margaret calling Thomas “OOOH THOMAS ! “ 

. Higgins being  friend with Thomas Brackenreid ?! .

No, Henry, don’t dream too much ;) 

. Julia and Daphné being friend after all . 

Of course they are, it’s Julia. 

. “The important is to who we are with and not what we have.” . 

I believe I’m close to the quote said by George at the beginning of the episode. And I believe that’s true

. A skeleton !!! . 

BEST. PRESENT.EVER 

I hope one of these girls will become a great Doctor one day ! 

. The last scene is beautiful . 

I have nothing more to add. It’s powerful and hopefull. 

So, that’s what I thought about the Christmas Special this year. I’ve been a bit quick and late, sorry all. I have enjoyed it. It was quite different from the others and clearly not like a traditionnal Christmas Movie like we can see on screen every year from November to January. I believe we are so much used to see all the same kind of movies at that time that this one is not like “one of them”. I believe this was the choice they made. To be honest, it’s not my favourite. I had good laughts, and I will re-watched it again, for sure. I may be wrong but I feel like this one has the approach to begin with what people clearly hate in the Holidays time : Find the right gifts, see that our budget is tricky, spending time with people we don”t want to, travel during hours, days for a traditionnal reunion, games and all, trying to makes others happy even if it’s not making us happy… And at the end of the movie, the only thing that matters is knowing who we are, what we love, giving not expensive gifts but just our time, spending it with people we really want to, knowing from where we come from. It’s respecting others, and their beliefs. Christmas in the real life is not a Christmas movie ! 

This movie show us “ the other side” and the one we see more often.

Well, that’s what I have feel. Feel free to comment below and share what you think about that special Christmas Special. And I wish you all a happy day, whatever you like christmas or not, because every day should be an happy one ;) 

JJB 

[magpiewords]

Family for the Holidays

@hanukkahprompts​ inspired me to write this idea I’ve had for a while. Basically, all the Avengers are Jewish, but due to miscommunication, assume the others want to celebrate Christmas. So this first prompt fill is mostly set up for that. I promise the rest of the prompt-fills will have more legit Hanukkah content.

Also, fun fact, the menorah ornament I wrote about at the end is something my family and I actually do with our decorations.

“Tony, isn’t it a little early for a tree?” Sam asked, having been bewildered by the massive tree in the Stark Industries lobby at the entrance of the building.

“Well, the next true holiday is Cyber Monday,” The billionaire winked at Jarvis’s nearest camera and Natasha almost choked on her coffee. “but it’s officially the holiday season. Aren’t you excited?”

Falcon tried to smile, he really did. The holidays weren’t all bad. Frost decorated the windows in the morning, everything was peppermint flavor, and families came together. Except for him. Now that he was a full time Avenger, going home in the middle of December to celebrate was out of the question. He tried not to be bitter about it, but years of school holidays then army leave times not matching up with the calendar brought up something Grinch-like inside him. At least he got to visit his mom for Rosh Hashanah this year. And it’s not like Dr. Doom would take a break just because a few bells were jingling.

“Yeah,” He finally said, “holiday season.” He gave Tony a pointed look but the other man just stared at him.

“Uh, yeah. But Christmas is everyone’s favorite, right?” The statement lacked his usual bravado and, for a second, Sam thought Tony might be genuinely asking the question. There was a long silence in the kitchen.

The question went unanswered as the Avengers alarm went off. The Red Room had sent assailants and Natasha cut them down with no remorse. She was always vicious but this was something especially terrifying. The Red Room had taken so much from her, so much she had to claw to take back. Years of studying and laughing with her mother, memories faded from the ruthless training she endured. The second she was free, she relearned every verse, every scrap of her broken faith even if she didn’t believe in it anymore. She reclaimed a small, secret part of herself in the sands east of the Dead Sea, with a rabbi who she met for only moments but would defend with her life.

The way Tony talked about the holidays brought that goofy smile to his face, a smile she would defend with her life too.

When the fighting was over and Sam walked back into the communal floor to see Natasha setting up a small tree next to the couch, he couldn’t really bring himself to be annoyed.

The fight hadn’t needed Bruce to get involved. The doctor would never say he was disappointed not to have hulked out, but he was already grumpy and it would have been nice to let off some steam. He was annoyed at the obnoxious tree in the lobby and more so at the tiny one that had snuck in closer to home. The smell of pine sent him miles and years away, back to the nightmares in a tiny house in Ohio. He doesn’t want to hate winter holidays, but he’d give anything for the smell of candles burning low instead of all this mistletoe garbage.

“That stuff is poisonous, you know.” He grumbled as he walked past Steve setting it up over a doorway.

“I’m told it doesn’t get eaten, it gets kissed under. It sounded fun.” Steve teased, but didn’t push further. He could tell Bruce wasn’t in the best mood, taking his supplies to decorate another part of the Tower.

A few days later, with December barely started, Tony gave everyone red hats with white trim. Bruce had stared at the gift, then looked up to see Tony staring at him. “They sounded fun.” The billionaire had an elf hat, jingling the bell with a tilt of his head.

With a sigh, Bruce put on the the ridiculous hat. He put it on every morning when he woke up, wearing it in the lab, wearing it to meetings and dinners, wearing it because Tony and Steve and even Natasha smiled when they saw him wear it. He’d give anything for those smiles.

The hats had been given out on a Saturday, and Bucky was no where to be found to receive one. No one knew were he went on Saturdays, but no one was bold enough to ask.

Steve had woken up in the 21st century, defrosted then shocked by how the world changed. Bucky woke up like he was still crashing through ice water – maybe that was when he woke up, in the chill of the Potomac as he remembered enough to rescue Steve from drowning under the crashing helicarriers. Even after that, it was endless ice and gasping for breath as he relived the horrors of what he had done. The guilt was overwhelming. He knew breaking away from Hydra was a blessing, but in the darkest days of his recovery, he sometimes missed the empty-headedness of being the Soldier.

The first time he told Steve about this, the blond had looked so lost. Despite being a full foot taller and with at least a hundred more pounds of muscle, his face looked just like the one from that scrawny kid in Brooklyn who had lost his mother right before the holidays. It was that look that told Bucky exactly what to do. Stevie had moved in with the Barnes just a few weeks before Hanukkah that year. Family brought together in the oil lamp light, that had kept Stevie from going over the deep end.

The synagogue three blocks south of the Tower was more than happy to welcome him into their family. The Avengers were becoming his family, but being in a temple with his people, even if it was a people decades younger than him, was the instant family he needed. The instant familiarity of tradition. He taught school on Saturdays, his Hebrew rusty with an accent at first, but it was a language he’d never truly lose. The rabbi was endlessly patient with him. The kids asked him all sorts of questions, from if they had chocolate gelt in the 1940s (they did) to if he had seen the latest Star Wars movie (he hadn’t when they asked, but suggested it for the following Avengers movie night. Finn was his favorite character).

It was their endless chatter about movies that had gave him an idea for how to participate in the Avenger’s holiday decorating. Clint was the first to see it, cackling so hard over the sexy lamp from A Christmas Story that Bucky had to step in to keep the egg nog from boiling over.

“No one in this tower knows the holiday spirit as truly as you do.” Clint said seriously once he regained his breath.

“You’ll shoot your eye out, kid.” Bucky winked at him. None of the kids at temple had known any Hanukkah movies, but every single one of them had tried sticking their tongue to a frozen pole at some point. Bucky was pretty sure he had tried that as a kid too.

Clint wasn’t sure how he had become the egg nog master chef, but it seemed like he was making a batch at least once a day since the first tree had gone up. He didn’t mind, it was delicious and he was waiting to see if any of the team would notice it was kosher, but he was pretty sure he’d never had the drink before this holiday season. It just seemed like the thing to do.

Coulson had never even touched a tree ornament before, but decorating the small thing Natasha had brought in seemed like the right thing to do. He’d found designs featuring all of the Avengers, had gotten different molecules made of metal for the scientifically inclined in the house, and the collection of multi-colored string lights gave the room a homey glow late at night when those who couldn’t sleep ended up in the living room. No one would expect Coulson to care about the commercialized holiday, least of all Coulson, but he hadn’t expected his family of super heroes to care about it either. And if they were happy, he was happy.

“Wait,” Sam had walked in as Coulson was putting up the latest round of ornaments he had bought. Hallmark had a sale on snowflakes and the agent was surrounded by tiny boxes.

Sam had a tiny box of his own and walked right up to the tree. Whatever was inside was placed on a branch right in the front. Stepping back to stand next to Coulson, they looked together at the small clay menorah that decorated the tree.

“Now it’s perfect.” Phil said, doing little to hold back his smile as Sam grinned next to him. Maybe the Avengers didn’t care about being festive, so much as they cared about being festive with each other.

<next>

[wiremagazine]

IN MEMORIAM: HENRIETTA ROBINSON. A LIFE WELL LIVED

By Rafa Carvajal Photos provided by Henrietta’s friends

It is with great sadness that I write this In Memoriam about Henrietta Robinson, a beloved member of our LGBTQ community who lived in South Beach for over 60 years and passed away last week from COVID-19. I was in my office at Q Link Wireless when I heard the news about Henrietta’s passing, and I could not help but to start crying. Once I was able to compose myself, my thoughts shifted to that day I sat next to Henrietta for three hours at the "Cheers" bar downstairs at TWIST and listened attentively, over cocktails, to her wonderful and fascinating stories about her life and the history of South Beach. I will treasure those memories for the rest of my life.

As soon as she turned 18, Henrietta ran away from a very unstable family life in Boston and came to South Beach. Henrietta knew she was gay as a kid and was ostracized by her family and friends, but once she left, Henrietta never looked back. It actually took her family a full year to realize Henrietta was living in South Beach.

What better way to honor Henrietta’s memory and celebrate her life than to let some people who knew her well tell us why she was such a special person – in their own words.

Rafa Carvajal: What is your fondest memory of Henrietta? Peter Morales: My fondest memory of Henrietta was meeting her in the early-mid ‘90s at the Warsaw Ballroom where she would usually stand on the second floor overlooking the people dancing on the dance floor and enjoying life. She would always say hello to me when I walked by, with a huge smile, and always was full of compliments, and had a positive outlook on life about everything and everyone. She was such a happy and content person. Nathan Smith: My fondest memory of Henrietta would have to be the times she spent at my bar every Saturday and Sunday night. She would always come early, always have the same seat, and she had a special cup. I bought her many throughout the years, but it was always so important to me that she had a different glass than everyone else. She deserved to feel special and honored. She was an icon and having her sit at my bar was an honor. David Johnson: One of my fondest memories of Henrietta is how she made her birthday a true celebration of life. It felt as though we were all part of her family there to share in the fabulous festivities! Every year, she made us all feel connected to her life by bringing us together. Mario Trejo: My fondest memory of Henrietta is from back in 2009. She and Don Chung came over to my house and cooked a special dinner for me and my then boyfriend at the time. She had been asking me to come over and cook for us, when it finally happened Henrietta was so excited and happy to do it. She made us a lobster and pasta dish that was out of this world. I felt honored that she wanted to come over and do that for us. The true essence of a giving heart is the joy they receive from giving and seeing the reaction and appreciation on that person’s face. That was her reward, her joy and her love.

RC: What made Henrietta such a special person? Joel Stedman: Simply her being her. Henrietta was a constant in many of our lives in nightlife. We attended almost every White Party together, she never missed a TWIST anniversary and every year was a feature in our float presentation for Miami Beach Gay Pride. I enjoyed her immensely. Her smile, her laugh, what amazing stories she would tell. She was that one person you could always walk up to and had nothing but sweet things to say. It is the end of an era, losing both her and Richard within the same year. When it is safe for all of us to get together again, we will have a mad celebration in her honor. Somebody will have to bring the cookies. PM: Henrietta always glowed and shined wherever you saw her. She was a beam of light with a bright aura. Everyone always wanted to say hello to Henrietta, speak with her, and, of course, have their picture taken with her! NS: What made Henrietta so special is that she always lived her truth. Henrietta did what made her happy and gave no apologies for who she was. She was and always will be an example for us all to be our true authentic selves. DJ: Her unique style set her apart from all the rest! Henrietta always had a warm and loving smile to share with everyone. Her iconic personality lit up any room and made everyone feel happy and at ease. MT: Henrietta loved to give. She was a true giver and she did it better than anyone. She gave from her heart whether it was your favorite dish, favorite dessert, or a Christmas gift wrapped in an envelope. This woman prided herself not only on wearing the best Bob Mackie ensembles and finest diamond, gold and platinum jewelry (all custom made), but also in her giving – and I can’t stress that enough! I remember for Christmas she would give everyone $100 bill in an envelope, and she went to all the gay clubs in South Beach. She made it a point to go to TWIST, Palace, Score and Mova, and give everyone an envelope. You could see the joy on her face as she gave it to you. That was her reward, to see you get excited and happy made her happy. On that she was consistent until the very end. The last thing I remember her making for Nathan, myself, JD, Michael, and many others at TWIST before it closed from the coronavirus pandemic, was brownies (not the fun brownies lol). They were so delicious! We ate them with a fresh cup of coffee from Nathan’s coffee maker. She always cooked or baked weekly and had that, “I can’t wait to give it to them attitude.” She would walk up the stairs in bar 4 with her big Saks Fifth Avenue bag filled with all the dishes she was going to hand out that night, and she did that almost every Saturday without fail! She lived to give. It was who she was.

RC: What else would you like to share with Wire Magazine readers about Henrietta? PM: Henrietta was always so thoughtful throughout our years of friendship, especially during the holiday seasons with her beyond amazing and delicious lasagnas, baked goods and pies. Several years ago she gifted me a 21-piece "Temp-tations" Ovenware Kitchen Bake Set for cooking and serving since she knew I loved to cook, and that I always cooked for my entire family during the holiday seasons. I cherish and love this cookset so much and think of her every time I use it.

I will miss seeing Henrietta and speaking with her, but I will never forget Henrietta, and especially how she made me feel every time we saw each other. NS: She loved you all. Nothing made Henrietta happier than when people would approach her for a picture, and she loved hearing your life stories and telling you hers. She loved helping anyone and everyone out, whether it was with a plate of her food, advice or guidance. She wanted the best for everyone. I know she would have wanted all of you to take away from her passing to be safe and stay at home until this virus is under control. Henrietta would also have wanted you to always love each other, but love yourself first and be yourself proudly. RIP Henrietta. I will always love you and your place at the bar will always be there. Sending everyone lots of love and good energy. Xoxo. DJ: Henrietta loved to check up on me. I must admit I will truly miss the call I received once a week when Henrietta called just to say hello. MT: Henrietta touched my heartstrings even deeper than her coming over to my place to cook, bringing us delicious desserts and dishes. It was when my 21-year-old nephew Andrew came from California to stay with me in 2010. He and Henrietta had this incredible instant connection/bond when they met at TWIST, and they would go out to different places like Palace, Score and, of course, TWIST. Andrew would go get Henrietta and take her to whatever bar she was in the mood for that day, and they would have fun. My nephew even convinced her to go to Wet Willie‘s, of all places, and that’s when Henrietta back in the day would drink her rum and Coke with lemon. Andrew always had a blast with her and he would say “OMG uncle Mario, Henrietta is too funny,” with her quick and amazing stories. As you all know, she had great stories to tell. So for all of her great qualities and attributes, her taking my nephew under her wing and vice versa, I will always love her mostly for that!

I also want to share some excerpts from the Wire Magazine interview of Henrietta by Thomas Barker from June 2011, when Henrietta was celebrating her 50 year anniversary in South Beach. Visit wiremag.com to read the extended version of Henrietta’s In Memoriam and the full interview from 2011.

At age 19 Henrietta saw her first drag show. At age 22, she dressed up as a woman for the very first time (other than when she was 10 or 11 and dressed up in her sisters' clothes). She won Miss Florida in 1969 singing, not lip-synching, "On a Clear Day You Can See Forever." Then, after her favorite uncle died in the early '80s, she never wore men's clothes again! Her outfit became permanent.

"When my uncle passed away, that's when I said that's it," Henrietta recounted. "I started living that way from then on – it was permanent drag from then on! I was gay, of course, and wasn't ever interested in a sex change or anything." And nothing Henrietta wears when she dresses like a woman is fake. Her chinchilla outfit, lace or silk gowns, large-carat diamond rings, gold bracelets – they're all real, just as real as Henrietta.

Thomas Barker: When and how did you arrive in Miami Beach, Henrietta? Henrietta Robinson: I came to Miami Beach in 1958. My uncle, my mother's brother, had a restaurant here. I was 18-years-old and never was on my own in my life until then. I lived a pretty sheltered life in Boston. My mother died when I was born. I was raised by my grandmother, my father's mother. I couldn't go out and play with other kids and was kept in the house all the time.

TB: How old were you back then? Did you realize you were gay at an early age? HR: Oh, I was 10 or 11-years-old. I knew I was gay since I loved playing with my sisters' dolls! I loved dressing up. When my sisters dressed me up, my grandmother would go through the roof! My sisters were a lot older, they were 18 and 20-years-old. I was the baby in the family.

TB: Did you ever imagine the Beach would come full circle to where it is today? HR: I never thought in my time the gay community would be so free to be who they are and not be hassled by the police. In my day, if you walked down the street and if the police thought you were gay, they had the right to beat you up. They always said you looked at them the wrong way or you touched them. They had no hesitation in throwing you in jail. Now, I love it! Gay life has always flourished here – whether it was underground or above ground; or whether it was 23rd Street or 12th Street. Gays were everywhere and in every profession. Today, I feel so free and it's such a pleasure! A lot of these young gay kids don't know what somebody like me has gone through. And they don't have too many people to learn about the history since all the old-timers are gone.

This was originally published in Wire Magazine Digital Issue 2.2020

[kingfallstranscripts-blog]

Episode 15: Stormy Weather, More at Eleven

(King Falls AM Theme plays)

Ben: Can we please play it again, Sammy?

Sammy: Oh, will you stop it?

Ben: Think of it as my early Christmas present! Just one more time!

Sammy: You are way too happy about this, Ben.

Ben: It’s like watching Van Gogh paint Starry Night, Sammy. But backwards and then exploding like fireworks right before our very eyes.

Sammy: Or ears, in this case.

Ben: Well, yeah, of course ears. You get it, people.

Sammy: So, is this on your schedule, Ben?

Ben: You know that it isn’t. Just give me that one tiny sliver of happiness. I need this! It completes me.

Sammy: You are evil. And that is why we get along so well.

Ben: *laughs*

Sammy: Roll the damn tape!

Ben: Yes!

(Channel 13 Tape Starts)

Storm Sanders: Are we f**kin live, yall? I got sh*t to – (in professional voice) Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. This is your friendly neighborhood weatherman, Storm Sanders. And boy do we have some interesting weather here in the next *hiccups* few days.

Maggie: Storm are you feeling alright?

Storm: Maggie, you bet your motha (censored) ass I’m alright. Let’s just get to the forecast on yours truly today. Storms feelin’… partly cloudy with 100% chance of makin it rain down at the Red Rock bar. Holla at cha *hiccup* boy, Chet! Stacks on deck.

Maggie: Umm, we’re live Storm. If you could just get to the actual weather report –

Storm: F**k yo weather. You got a brain. Open the window and see if it’s hot. If it’s hot? I can’t change that s**t! If it’s cold? Put some more clothes on! If Steve will let you cover up those big ol’ t**ties!

Maggie: Storm!

Storm: Maaaaan, f**k it. Who the f**k even needs a weather report these days? It’s on ya phone! It’s on ya twitter! If I say it’s gonna rain it ain’t gonna change a f**kin thing! Mannnn, my skin feels weird.

(Tape cuts out)

Ben: *laughing hysterically*

Sammy: You are taking way too much pleasure in this.

Ben: Channel 13! Giving you all the news and weather you can handle.

Sammy: He isn’t wrong.

Ben: Ladies and gentlemen, if you missed that on your local news this evening, his words were only bleeped on King Falls AM. I’m sure if you YouTube it… *laughs* oh man. How long before somebody auto-tunes that?

Sammy: Moving forward, what’ve we got in store this evening?

Ben: If you or somebody you know knows how to do those talking music things, give us a call or tweet us @KingFallsAM.

Sammy: Ben…

Ben: I’m sorry. It’s just that we don’t get to win much around here, Sammy. We should enjoy these moments.

Sammy: If this were any other news station would you be this happy?

Ben: No, but Channel 13 is the hub of all evil. If you told me -  

Sammy: AGAIN, moving forward… what do we have on tab for the rest of the evening?

Ben: Ahem… can we do a weather report?

Sammy: You’re a child!

Ben: *laughing* Okay, folks, we’ve actually got some good stuff coming up in the next hour. Mr. Ron Begley from Begley’s Bait & Tackle will be visiting the show and talking to us about the 5th annual Bare Back Bear Festival.

Sammy: *laughs incredulously* Wow, uh, ya know, I guess I shouldn’t be that surprised.

Ben: I don’t get it. W-why are you laughing? You think riding a bear without a saddle is easy?

Sammy: Ben…your naivety brightens my day.

Ben: Whatever…Sammy. Anyway, coming up at the 5 o’clock hour, we’ve got Linda Miles over at King Falls Gazette calling in to give us the weekly Tim Jenson update.

Sammy: And hopefully filling us in with some good news. It sounds like we have a hell of a show happening, so stay tuned kids. We’re gonna pay some bills and hear a few words from our sponsors. We’ll be right back, King Falls.

(Jazz Music Plays)

“Ah, yeah. You’ve got the one and only Chet Sebastian here wishing all y’all out there the happiest of holiday seasons. This time of year you’re always on the lookout for a gift that’s gonna get ya a little something extra, and old Chet is here to deliver “Chet Sebastian’s Honey Pot of Horns”. A classy lady can’t so no to a man that knows his smooth jazz. With my newest album “Chest Sebastian’s Honey Pot of Horns”, you’ll look like the damn Albert Einstein of the brass section. Whether you’re a-givin or receivin. “Honey Pot of Horns” is a surefire way for a happier Hanukkah, a crazier Kwanza, a kinkier Christmas. No downloads here, cause a real man only spins vinyl for his lucky lady. Be Merry, you sexy thangs”

(Welcome to 660 theme plays)

Sammy: So, have you picked up Chet’s new album for that someone special in your life, Ben?

Ben: *chuckles* Dude, no. I love Chet, like you love a creepy masochistic uncle, but I can’t give that record to Emily.

Sammy: I hear classy ladies -

Ben: Don’t

Sammy: *laughs* Alright, folks. We’re gonna take some calls here while we wait on Ron to make his way into the studio. Give us a call 424-279-3858.

Ben: Or tweet us over at twitter @KingFallsAM. We gonna go with any particular topic or –

Sammy: We aren’t talking about Storm if that’s what you’re getting at.

Ben: Dammittttt. Line 5! You’re on with Sammy and Ben.

Cynthia: Ben Arnold! You ought to be ashamed of yourself! Making fun of poor Storm Sanders tonight.

Ben: Oh, come on! Channel 13 would jump at the chance to destroy us. One of their stupid “For the King Falls Community” investigations. Serves them right!

Cynthia: You’re just so much better than all of us, aren’t you, Ben? Why don’t you just move out of King Falls and go do your radio show in some metropolis or something!

Sammy: Cynthia, while I understand your frustration with Ben’s…giddiness, I –

Cynthia: Don’t give me any of your mumbo jumbo, Sammy. You’re high salutin, too! You’re probably doing this for “Make a Wish” kids or some sort of tax evasion scheme.

Sammy: What?!

Ben: Cynthia, I don’t understand this anger, even from you, tonight.

Cynthia: I just think you need to think before you poke fun. You of all people should know this isn’t as cut and dry as it looks.

Sammy: What are you getting at Cynthia?

Ben: *from the side of his mouth* She’s probably on the sauce that Storm is on…

Cynthia: He said his skin felt weird, idiots! Or did you miss that with all your jackass laughing, Ben?

Ben: Wait, are you sure about that?

Cynthia: 100%, because I wasn’t acting a fool when a man was having a crisis live on the television!

Ben: This isn’t good…

Sammy: What am I missing here?

Cynthia: Guess they don’t teach that kind of stuff at the Connecticut School of Broadcasting, do they, Sammy?

Sammy: Okay, first off, Cynthia, I did not go to that school. Second off –

Ben: His skin felt weird, Sammy.

Cynthia: Maybe if you paid attention in Simple Possessions and Hauntings 101 –

Ben: I’ll take it from here. Cynthia, have a great night.

Cynthia: Oh, of course you’re hanging up on me! High and mighty King Falls AM. You’ll see…

Ben: I didn’t hang up, Cynthia. But we gotta put the wheels in motion here.

Cynthia: Oh, please. You don’t have to sweet talk me. *hangs up*

Sammy: What’s the deal, Ben?

Ben: I should’ve seen this before. DAMMIT. I let my hatred from that terrible excuse for a news organization cloud my judgement.

Sammy: Are you gonna tell me what’s going on, or should I just make up my own thing here?

Ben: Sorry, Sammy. Legend has it, when certain types of spirits take a hold of a person…

Sammy: Uh-huh… “legend has it”…I see.

Ben: Don’t look at me like – forget it! It’s like a possession.

Sammy: Oh, like The Exorcist.

Ben: Kinda like it, but actually scary.

Sammy: Have you seen The Exorcist?!

Ben: I’m being serious! We need to get ahold of Storm. Folks, if you know Storm Sanders personally or can get us in touch with him, please dial in to the show- 424-279-3858.

Sammy: This is for real?

Ben: I’m a little worried. Cynthia, if you haven’t turned off the show in a blind rage, THANK YOU. Thank you for point this out to us.

Sammy: Okay, we’ve got some phone action. Line 12 you’re on King Falls AM.

Troy: Hey, Sammy. Ben.

Ben: We can’t do this right now, Troy.

Troy: I’m callin’ to make peace, Ben. The SS Friendship is ready to dock. All aboard.

Ben: *disconnects call* Not now, Troy! We’ve got a situation!

Sammy: Did you just hang up on Troy?!

Ben: Sammy, this is life or death! Line 5, this is Sammy and Ben.

Herschel: Alright listen you two dumbasses. This Storm fella looks like he’s about a medium build, maybe a buck 180. You get yourselves a gunny sack, some come-along straps, and a roll of duct tape. You meet me 19 clicks from Old Rose’s café at 0400 hours-

Ben: *disconnects call* Sorry, Herschel. You can cuss extra at us later.

Sammy: Oh, he’s gonna.

Ben: Line 10, hello?

Caller: *Native American inflection* Ben is right to be worried.

Sammy: And who are we speaking with?

Ben: Have you seen him tonight, sir?

Caller: I watched his outburst on the television.  I have been driving around downtown and around the station for the last few hours. No luck.

Ben: So, you’re out actively looking for him?

Sammy: Have you tried the Red Rock bar, perhaps?

Ben: Not now, Sammy. I’m sorry – who is this?

Caller: This is Walt. That is all you will get.

Ben: Fair enough. So you know the legend?

Walt: I know the truth. Saying “legend” makes it seem like people haven’t seen it with their own eyes. Or lived it. I have done both.

Sammy: Can one of you two please explain what we are so worried for myself and for the listeners?

Ben: Legend has it – ah sorry- uh, the story goes that…well, I said it was like possession, but really, it’s like a hostile takeover of your mind, body, and soul. Is that right, Walt?

Walt: My people tell stories of men with evil hearts living outside Hatchineha lands. Their only purpose on this earth is to claim others as they once were claimed.

Ben: They call them skinwalkers, Sammy.

Sammy: Not…the best sounding thing to hear on a late night, but… please continue, Walt.

Walt: These men, if you can call them that, tampered with things they should not have tampered with. They became things one should not be. They have the ability to go in one form and out to another as they please. All while searching to make more of their kind.  

Sammy: Okay, well as much as I don’t like this or hardly believe it, what does this have to do with Storm Sanders?

Ben: That’s the interesting part, Sammy. When confronted and converted, I guess you could say, victims start to act in certain ways.

Sammy: Certain, drunken way. If every guy I’ve seen hammered in a bar who sing-cries his way through an 80’s love ballad is a skinwalker, then we are all in deep trouble.

Ben: Not the drunken thing. An uneasiness in one’s body.

Walt: They begin to exhibit signs of outer sickness: fever, sweats, an itching.

Ben: An itching so bad that…they try to peel their skin off.

Sammy: So they’re the werewolves from Route 72?

Walt: No!

Ben: No way!

Sammy: Guys! I’m just trying to grasp this. I’m a pretty piss poor cryptozoologist and let’s be honest, skinwalker sound like it’d be a term for a naked zombie.

Ben: Whatever, Sammy. Keep cracking jokes.

Walt: I need to pay better attention to my tracking, gentlemen. I’m going to let you go. Be well, be safe.

Ben: Thank you so much for the call, Walt. Stay in touch, please.

Walt: Only if I have to. *hangs up*

Sammy: So, you heard it, kids. If you should happen upon your local weatherman… *sighs* You know, I had a joke here. What should I say if they do see him?

Ben: *flustered* DO NOT LOOK HIM IN THE EYES. Stay calm, get to a phone, and call us at the station.

Sammy: Or a dog catcher. We don’t need a ton of guys to go pick this guy up. He’s dangerous, if not to us, then to himself.

Ben: Call the sheriff’s office, guys. Be safe and be aware of your surroundings.

Sammy: Okay. Let’s take another caller, Ben.

Ben: Let’s do it. Line 9, welcome to King Falls AM with Sammy and Ben.

Troy: Ben, don’t you hang up on me. I’m growin real tired of hearing your little pity party every night. I’m tryin to make this right. Now listen, I’ve got an idea…and it is a good one.

Ben: Ho! That’s a first. Is this you trying to get in my good graces by finding the weatherman?

Troy: I don’t give two shakes of a lambs (censored) about a weatherman, Ben. I just want things to be right with us again.

Ben: There is no us, Troy.

Sammy: Let’s just calm down fellas.

Ben: I’ll make this quick, Sammy. You gonna avenge Serendipity the sugar glider, Troy?

Troy: Oh come on, man. You know I can’t.

Ben: Then this conversation is over. AGAIN. For the last time.

Troy: It’s Christmas time, Ben…or Hanukah, or Kwanza…can’t you find it in your heart to forgive?

Ben: YEAH, I don’t think so. Put me on the naughty list. Bye, Troy.

Troy: There ain’t nothin but friendship goin in your stocking at my house, Ben. I’m gonna fix this, future buddy. You’ll see. *hangs up*

Ben: Don’t look at me like that, Sammy. Let’s take another call.

Sammy: I just think you’re being a little harsh, that’s all. You’re amped up, you’re hanging up on friends of the show, you’re hanging up on listeners.

Ben: Okay, Troy is not a friend of the show…. He’s a friend of the you.

Sammy: Ben…

Ben: Don’t “Bennnn” me, Sammy. Can we just get back to the task at hand?

Sammy: Yes. Folks, if you’d like to get hung up on by us, please give us a call 424 –

Ben: Lucky Line 1! You’re live on the air.

Caller: *talking very fast* Yeah, uh, thanks for taking my call. I’d like to talk about city ordinance 44812-36. Uh, these politicians think they can pull the wool over our eyes again! But some of –

Ben: Sorry to cut you off, sir, but we’ve got to a station emergency happening. Give us a call back next week when councilmen Davidson is on.

Caller: Media Puppet! …. bye.

Sammy: Storm isn’t gonna call in himself, Ben. Maybe we need to take a break and re-group here.

Ben: I’m just worried, man. I don’t think you get how bad this is.

Sammy: I don’t ever get how bad any of this is. Does… skinwalking happen a lot?

Ben: Well, the Hatchineha Indians believed it did. It’s just a scary bedtime story to the King Falls kids I guess, but for the first time I feel like this might be a real thing.

Sammy: Are you sure it’s not just the clowns down at Channel 13? Like, you really believe this?

Ben: I believe that they believe it… and I believe they know more about it than we ever will. Think about it. Just crossing paths with one of these evil ass beings, animals, spirits, what-have-you…and you’re toast. If you look it in the eyes it locks eyes with you then there is no more you.

Sammy: It’s an unsettling thought.

Ben: Skinwalkers, man. Wicked spirits taking the form of different things i.e – news reporters! Looking to just suck the soul right out of you! It’s like pure frickin’ evil! I just want everyone listening to be safe.

Sammy: And I think that’s the main point tonight. Stay safe out there, King Falls. I just don’t like this…

Ben: Yeah, I don’t either!

Sammy: Okay, I’m just trying to grasp this – why do you want to find him?  And more to the point, why do you want us to find him?

Ben: Same reason Walt was out there searching for Storm. They say if it’s caught in time, it can be reversed. Not by me, obviously, but if we can of service to the community, why wouldn’t we do what we can?

Sammy: *admired silence* You’re a good dude, Ben Arnold. Folks, sit tight. We’re just gonna take a quick minute or two to get everything- *sudden knock at the door* WHAT THE (CENSORED)

Ben: NOT FUNNY, SAMMY.

Sammy: That wasn’t me! That’s the studio door.

Ben: Uhhhh- RECORDING LIGHT IS ON. GO AWAY.

Sammy: *whispering* Oh yeah, I think that did it. *more loud knocking* Dammit. You wanna get that?

Ben: No!

Sammy: Ben! Okay let’s cut to commercial and we’ll answer the door –

Ben: Do not go to commercial! I want whatever happens to be broadcast out to the masses, man.

Sammy: Oh, that’s a great idea. You gunning for the posthumous Pulitzer?

Ben: I’m just gonna dial up Troy… ya know, just in case.

Sammy: You know what, I’m the new guy. Let me answer the door.

Ben: Probably nothing…Oh, uh, maybe it’s Ron! He’s coming in, remember? Good ol’ scaring-the-bejesus-out-of-us Ron.

Sammy: Somehow, I don’t think this is Ron Begley at our door. Be right back…

Ben: That’s the spirit…take the portable mic with you. Hey, um, Sammy?

Sammy: Don’t. *sounds of Sammy walking and opening the door*

Storm: I ain’t the repo man, General (censored). Not answering the door? That’s some way to treat your brother in news reporting.

Ben: Sammy?!

Sammy: *clears throat* Uh, ladies and gentlemen, I’m standing in the parking lot now with Mr. Storm Sanders, Channel 13’s weatherman –

Storm: Ex-Channel 13. Get it right, Sammy.

Ben: *whispering* Don’t look in his eyes, Sammy.

Storm: What’s that?! Why ain’t you lookin at me, Sammy?

Ben: I’m coming, Sammy. Don’t look, man! *sounds of Ben running to Sammy* Don’t look him in the eyes, Sammy!

Storm: Well, hello to you too, Ben.

Ben: Avert your eyes, Sammy!

Storm: You are a rude piece of work, Ben. Look at me!

Ben: *laughs nervously* Yeah, uh, I’m not gonna do that.

Storm: What the (censored) are you two up to?!

Sammy: Ya know, okay *sighs* after seeing your outburst –

Storm: Is it cold out here to you?

Sammy: Ben – I, uh, we… King Falls, uh… we’re all a little worried that maybe, uh -

Storm: That what?! I ain’t got all night.

Ben: Well… it’s not like you’re gonna make the morning forecast *light laugh*

Storm: That’s uncalled for! But true. Spit it out, Sammy.

Sammy: Well, Ben, me, we…uh, we? We think that –

Storm: Phew, where’s ya thermostat boys?

Sammy: … We’re outside.

Storm: It’s hot as fire out here! Like ya junk once you landed one of Chet’s old ladies. Know what I mean? Are y’all feelin this (censored)?

Sammy: Storm! Focus! Ben thinks that, uh –

Ben: FACE IT, STORM! You’re a skinwalker! You’re a goner, man! Get outta here before you pass your soul eating virus on to us!

Sammy: What he said.

Storm: A skinwalker? A SKINWALKER?! You been lookin for my ass all night in this rinky dink little station just to call me on some voodoo (censored)?! I don’t like the cut of your jib, Ben. And - *faints*

Sammy: He- he just died, right? Is he dead?

Ben: He’s still breathing. What the HELL was that?

Sammy: I’m guessing Storm was going off the reservation and passing out, ladies and gents. *sounds of distant footsteps approaching* Not completely sure what we – WHAT THE- WHO ARE YOU?! What are you doing here?!

Walt: *sighs* Saving your lives. Thank me later. Now, grab his feet.

Ben: Walt?

Walt: That’s all you’ll get…

Ben: If Storm wakes up, don’t look in his eyes, Sammy!

Sammy: You know, I think I’ve got it now. Will you just stop standing there and give us a hand, please?

Ben: (censored) damn Channel 13, man!  

[rue-by-another-name]

“Home remedies” - h.s. Part 4

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3

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When you woke up Christmas morning, you instantly were thrown back to your grade school years. You were resting up against Harry with him on his side facing you, and you were curled up facing him, fitting right against his body with your face against his chest, legs tangled with his, and using his arm as a pillow. The rich and expensive Tom Ford smell you’d been used to around him these past couple of weeks was gone, and the smell of just Harry, a smell you were so familiar with, was evident.

It was so comforting, and you nuzzled right back up to him, regardless of the sun starting to stream through the windows. You were so at peace, feeling completely and utterly at ease as his arm that had been lazily slung over your waist slowly started to hold you a bit tighter. It was easy for you to fall back asleep, now knowing the source of the well-rested night you'd had.

It was about an hour later when Harry slowly started to wake up. He felt your presence before he knew where you were, and looking down at your body tucked up next to his, he couldn’t help but feel a smile start to spread across his face. You were asleep, and you weren’t going to see his reaction so he felt no shame in the wide smile that completely overtook his face and the small giggle that escaped from his giddiness at your cuteness and the comfort of being by your side.

Seeing you again, and Kat, had really hit him in a way he wasn’t fully expecting it. You were suddenly so present and so all-encompassing for his life that he wondered how he’d gotten along the last couple of years without you. He missed the cheeky side of Kat that came out late at night when everyone was tired but she was ready to go on another adventure. He missed the way he’d never felt alone around you, and how sometimes you’d be in his bed asleep having crawled through the window for the night before he’d even go up to bed. He missed having the support system of the three of you all together, and having that once again he knew so strongly that he couldn’t let it go now that he had it back.

And there was just something about you that Harry was so caught off guard by. You’d always been the most level-headed of the three of you. Claudia had kept you in check constantly, and so you were always on top of your game not only to get your work done, but also to make sure whatever you guys were doing wouldn’t get you all in a lot of trouble. You were still the same person now, just with more confidence and working with such a purpose that Harry felt soothing. All his troubles melted away whenever you were around, and the more time he spent with you the more he was reminded of just how comforting of a friend you had been. You’d been with him through so much, and you’d helped him become the person he was today without even realizing it.

Rolling onto his back, Harry slowly removed his arm from under your head. It was completely numb and he shook it out a bit before it started to regain feeling. Rubbing his eyes, he looked down to see the small furrow between your eyebrows at the loss of body heat you’d been sharing together. Slowly, and without any guilt for his actions, Harry pulled your body towards him a bit and allowed your head to rest on his stomach as he sat up a bit with his back against the headboard. The feeling of your cheek against his skin, the warmth emitting from your body as you clung to him in the early hours of the morning, was a feeling Harry hadn’t realized he’d missed so much.

He and Kat were close, they’d always had a special bond considering they went out and partied a lot more together when they were younger, but Harry had always found such a peace and confidence in you that he had yet to find anyone to replace. He’d always been looking out for Kat - making sure she didn’t date any losers, making sure she didn’t get too drunk at parties, making sure she was passing all her classes. But he had never had to worry about you. If anything, you just constantly had been the one worrying for him and always pestering him to be doing his best. It had felt good to always know there was someone worrying and wondering about you, and being with you every night had been the one constant thing he was usually able to rely on.

The door to your bedroom flew open and Harry jumped slightly, his hand clutching your shoulder when he’d been absentmindedly running his thumb along your skin as he held you.

“MERRY CHri -” Tilly and Kat were at the door, dressed in footsie pajamas and with Santa hats adorning their heads. But at Harry’s quick waving of his arm to grab their attention and then by bringing his finger to his lips, the two girls quickly quieted due to your sleeping state.

“It’s early,” Harry whispered, holding you a bit tighter as you stirred slightly.

“It’s Christmas!” Kat shot back, jumping onto the bed on her knees and bouncing up and down. “Come onnnnn,” she whined, shaking your leg under your duvet.

Sleepily, you came to, only to find yourself slouched against Harry and Kat towering over you. Tilly was standing at the end of the bed, looking a bit uncomfortable as Kat jumped up and down on top of you and Harry.

“MERRY CHRISTMAS,” Kat yelled, pulling out her phone and blasting All I Want For Christmas as she danced along your bed. You quickly pulled you legs in, afraid she would jump on them, and Harry did the same.

“It’s early,” you groaned, turning your face into Harry’s chest as he chuckled. The deep vibrations of his laugh made you shudder, and Harry took that as a sign for your chilliness and pulled the duvet up a bit.

“Oh come on,” Kat groaned, “You’re a morning person. You’re made for mornings. This is the morning of all mornings! Get up!”

“We made breakfast,” Tilly said quietly, smiling as Harry threw his fist in the air at the mention of food.

“Yeah. While you two were canoodling and sleeping in, we actually got some work done,” Kat said, sticking out her tongue at the two of you. “What’s wrong, H? Didn’t fit on the love seat?”

“I was feeling in the Christmas spirit and just let him sleep here,” you mumbled, not even feeling embarrassed that you were so intimately wrapped around Harry right now. This is how things always used to be, and just because you were older you didn’t feel the need to change that.

“It’s just like old times,” Kat sighed, “Going to Harry’s house to find Y/N out cold in his bed.”

“Did you guys used to date?” Tilly asked, coming over to sit next to where Kat had plopped down on the bed. It was a little comical, considering you and Harry were still half asleep under the covers and your two children were sitting on the bed waiting for you to get up. You couldn’t help but picture it in your head, if Kat and Tilly were two small little kids - one girl and one boy with dark chestnut hair as curly as Harry’s and eyes as bright as yours. But you quickly blinked and brought yourself back to the present situation at hand.

“No,” Harry chuckled, “We were all just friends. Really close. Y/N was just an insomniac who couldn't sleep in her own bed.”

You could have fought it, considering it truly was the other way around. But considering it was Christmas and you didn’t feel like talking about it, you just rolled you eyes and sat up, stretching before rubbing your eyes. “So do we have plans for today, or are we getting up early to do nothing but sit around?”

“I have the whole day planned out,” Kat said excitedly, jumping up from your bed and looking to her phone. “We’re going to have breakfast now because Til and I slaved away in the kitchen and it’s not going to go unwanted. Then, we’re going to watch whatever Christmas movie we so choose for the rest of the afternoon and open presents. We’ll have lunch which Harry and Y/N will prepare considering they did absolutely nothing this morning and after lunch we can chill, call family, check emails, you know ... adult things.”

Harry chuckled at that before sitting up next to you, both of you still coming to grips with being awake. “Anything else?”

“And tonight we’re going to party,” Kat nodded, “We’re going to club it up. We’re going to drink as much as we can, gorge on Christmas cookies, and then come home and sleep it off.”

“Tilly can’t drink,” you reminded everyone.

“You’re literally no fun,” Kat pouted, “But I knew you were going to say that which is why I invited Tilly’s boyfriend to come and hang out with her.”

“He’s not my boyfriend,” Tilly grumbled, “And you forced me to text him. He hasn't even texted back.”

“But you’re hot and sweet and so totally interesting so he’ll come,” Kat nodded.

“Well I’m game,” Harry yawned and stretched up a bit. It wasn’t long before Kat had herded all of you into the living room where the Christmas festivities commenced. 

“Do you think you’ll hear from your parents today?” you asked Harry as you all lounged around eating Christmas cookies and watching movies. Kat had recently received a call from her parents, excusing herself to her room to talk with them, sparking your interest with Harry.

“Probably not,” Harry shrugged, “They’re traveling home all day today so I’m sure they’ll be super busy.”

“What about Gem?”

“She’s probably going out of her mind at Charlie’s house. She’s never spent so much time with his family.”

“Well, I’m sure she’ll be seeing quite a bit more of them once they’re married,” you chuckled.

“I’m sorry you couldn’t spend the holidays with Claudia,” Harry mumbled softly, his arm coming around to wrap around your shoulders as you two sat on the love seat.

“I miss her,” you nodded, remembering the fun Christmas traditions you and your sister attempted to keep alive from what Claudia could remember of the holidays with your parents. “But I’m in good company,” you smiled, watching as Harry eyes lit up at your compliment.

“Todd texted back.” Tilly suddenly stood up from where she’d been sitting on the floor and looked at you both panicked. “He said he’s free tonight.”

“He’s free on Christmas?” Harry whistled, “He must like you quite a bit.”

“He’s staying with his aunt and uncle for the holidays because he didn’t want to spend money on train tickets to go home,” Tilly explained, “Holy shit he’s actually coming out tonight with us.”

“You’re going to be fine,” you chuckled, “Relax.” You felt Harry’s thumb massaging your shoulder as you both watched Tilly anxiously pace, and when you turned to look at him, he was smirking at Tilly’s hot mess instead of even paying attention to what he was doing. Goosebumps started to rise on your skin.

“You cold?” Harry turned to you, feeling the goosebumps under his warm had as you shook your head. 

“No no I’m fine,” you nodded, “Just excited is all.”

Kat was quick in getting the girls all into shape for clubbing. But what you all soon came to realize was that “clubbing” for Kat meant a chance at some business interactions, and so you grumbling non-stop as you found yourself sliding into yet another dress to go and sulk at a party.

“This is ridiculous,” you mumbled, “I look ridiculous.”

“You look fine,” Kat snapped, “Now we’re going to go out and have fun. Tilly is going to get laid, I’m going to land a movie contract, Harry will probably get laid as well -” You all heard Harry chuckle from where he was scrolling through his phone on your bed, making you all glare at him as he shrugged, “And you ... there will be champagne probably!”

“What?” you huffed, “Don’t think I can get laid?”

All eyes turned to you as silence overtook the room, then everyone burst out laughing. 

“Sweetheart, it’s not that we don’t think you can get laid,” Kat laughed, “It’s just that you never attempt to get laid ever. You put absolutely no effort into flirting with absolutely anyone.”

“Jeremy at work has been flirting with you for weeks and you haven’t even noticed,” Tilly chuckled, “Not to mention both Adam and Eric have asked you out and you turned both of them down. That new intern Henry has had a crush on you since he started working.”

“Damn,” Harry whistled, “Got a lot of suitors there, Y/N.” His cheeks were a bit flushed, his eyes larger than usual, and you wondered if maybe he’d started pre-gaming a bit more than the rest of you.

“I haven’t noticed,” you rolled your eyes, “Don’t get all protective brother on me.”

“I’m not getting -”

“Yes you are. You’re doing that thing again where you speak in a condescending tone and then you next comment will be something about being a lady or whatever and then I’ll say, ‘You’re right Harry, Trevor Ingles is an asshole and I should be single for basically all of my school career.’”

“Trevor was a jerk who only wanted to get into your pants because he heard from Barry Greidan that you were a good kisser in the locker room,” Harry said defensively. “So I’m sorry for saving you from a horrid date that would have ended in you having to punch him.”

“Maybe I wouldn’t have punched him.”

“You would have fucked Trevor Ingles? The lad that made fun of me for almost three years?” Harry raised an eyebrow. “Your morals were a lot lower than I remember.”

You groaned and stomped your foot, “No! I obviously wouldn’t have fucked Trevor. But I’m just saying, if I wanted to, I would have.”

“Yeah but remember that time Mason Banks asked you on a date and when he kissed you you just kind of burrowed away and slinked back into your house and then forced Harry and I to come over so you could rant about how chivalry is dead?” Kat chuckled, “Face it sister, no man has ever met your standards and that’s why you’ll never even bat an eye at anyone for a one night stand.”

“I could if I wanted!” you huffed, “I’ve had one night stands in the past.”

“You have?” all three of the people in your room asked, making you blush as you turned to check your phone.

“We should go,” you mumbled, “I don’t want to be in this dress any longer than I have to.”

“Then we all have plans to get laid tonight,” Kat nodded, “This should be interesting.”

“Oh you’re planning on it as well?” Harry smirked, nudging Kat as you all made your way to his car.

“Might as well,” Kat sighed, “It’s the holidays. I’m feeling generous.”

What Kat had failed to tell all of you when she’d suggested going out, was that this was a holiday party put on by her network, and it was merely business for her. She was on a mission to rise above where she was, and you commended her for her hard work ethic as you watched her march right over to the producers she’d been chatting with the other night and address them with a warm smile.

You could tell right away that the producers and actors she was talking with were interested and pleased with her presence. Who wouldn’t like talking with Kat Kapoor? She was gorgeous, smart, humble, and a strong force and breath of fresh air. You were sure that even though Kat was new to her TV show, new to the network, and new to this whole business, that wasn’t going to stop her from getting what she wanted.

Especially not when she dressed in clothes that demanded attention and oozed a regal quality about her.

“She’s something, huh?” Harry stuffed his hands in his pockets as you both watched Kat laugh at something one of the group members had said, placing her hand on his arm and smiling at him. 

“She has very good qualities that people are drawn to,” you nodded, “She’s going to have no problem getting laid.”

“You’re still on that,” Harry chuckled, shaking his head and turning to face you. “Were those comments really bothering you that much?”

“I work out,” was your response. “I take my time choosing what I wear and doing my makeup and I take pride in all of this,” you said gesturing to yourself. “I tell myself I’m hot quite often in order to exude the amount of confidence I feel I should carry with me. I’m pretty famous in my own right, you know.”

You didn’t realize how flustered you were until you felt your cheeks burning and Harry raising his eyebrows at you. “Are you done?” he asked.

“Yes,” you mumbled. “Sorry!” You couldn’t help but groan and place your hands over your face. “I don’t know. I just always felt like such a dud compared to you and Kat growing up and I just feel like it’s all happening again. I mean, Kat always had a boyfriend and boys were always in love with her. And you definitely have no shortage of girls running after you - both back then and now. I know it’s juvenile, but I just always felt like I couldn’t relate to something you and Kat shared and that was your relationship experience.”

“You’ve had plenty of relationships,” Harry squeezed your arm in reassurance. “You dated Tom Dillon for like, two years.”

“I can’t believe you remember that.”

“Worse two years of our friendship,” Harry shrugged, “How could I forget?”

“You really think so?” you winced, thinking back to the pre-teen years.

“He didn’t like me,” Harry shrugged, “We still all hung out, but that was two whole years of not sitting with you at lunch, not getting to hang out with you just the two of us, and especially two years of not being able to sleep by your side. That killed me.”

“I didn’t know you felt that way. I’m sorry,” you said softly.

“I’ve felt a lot of things I never shared,” Harry shrugged, “The more people know about me, the more I try to be more of a private person.”

“Well,” you not rested your hand on his arm. “If you ever need to tell anyone anything, I’m here now.”

“I know,” Harry smiled at you as you couldn’t help but smile back. His eyes drifted to behind you before he pressed his hand to yours. “Look at Tilly.”

You both turned to see Tilly dancing and smiling with Todd, her dress swishing around them as they danced closely and talked. You watched as Todd leaned in, pressing his lips to Tilly’s as the two of them started to make out.

“Young love,” you sighed, “She looks gorgeous.”

“Kat’s closet is coming more and more in handy,” Harry nodded. 

“So what about you?” you asked, turning back to see Harry still watching as Tilly and Todd shared a smile. 

“What about me?”

“Well, why aren’t you scoping out the room? You don’t want to lose this whole bet thing, now do you?” you joked, “It would be embarrassing if I got laid and you didn’t.”

Harry didn’t say anything for a moment, before he reached out and let the material of your dress slide through his fingers. “I don’t know,” he said softly, “I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately.”

“Yeah?” you cocked your head to the side and pressed your hand down on his chest, smoothing out a wrinkle absentmindedly as he gripped the skirt of your dress and pulled you to him. “What about?”

“Do you think things would be different now, if we hadn’t lost contact?” Harry asked, “Do you think we’d still be close.”

“I think losing contact was the best thing that could have happened,” you said truthfully, “We were all free to go and do what we loved and explore new opportunities without feeling tied down to anything. And now being here with you again, it’s like having the chance to meet you all over again.”

“You think I’m that different?”

“The smell is off,” you admitted, smiling up at Harry as he gave you a confused look. “You used to smell different, without the fancy expensive cologne.”

“Noted,” he chuckled.

“Besides,” you shrugged, “Kat would have never realized her love for theater and you probably wouldn’t have pursued singing as much as you did. It’s good we all grew apart and were all able to grow back together.”

“Yeah but I’m talking about you and me,” Harry stated, his arms wrapping around your waist now as you had to arch your back to look up at him. “Do you think we’d be any different?”

“I don’t know,” you said truthfully, “And we never will.”

“I woke up this morning really happy,” Harry admitted, “Happier than I’ve been in a while. Probably because of you. You were there. Back then that was all I needed.”

“We were really good friends,” you nodded, “Like family.”

“God Y/N,” Harry took a step back from you and let your dress fall from his hands. “Is that really all I am to you?”

Harry raised his voice a bit, leaving you to look around worriedly before pushing him back into the hallways, shooing him away without drawing much attention. “What is going on with you?” you asked, “Why are you so strung up?”

“I don’t know what’s going on with me,” Harry pulled at his hair, pacing a bit before looking up at you. “It’s just, I have all these amazing memories from when we were kids. I think of you whenever I think of all the great memories. You’re so engrained in my mind that your impact still dancing across my skin it’s just ...” Harry sighed, “I can’t help but wonder - to think that ...”

“That what?”

“What if we were meant to be more? What if finding our way to each other’s bed wasn’t because we were friends, but because our bond was that strong that we couldn’t be away from one another? I see you now and I just ... you’re all I’ve been thinking about since I saw you again.”

“What are you saying?”

“I’m saying I don’t want you to try and get laid tonight. I just want to go home and cuddle you and celebrate Christmas with you and maybe, if you really want to get laid so badly, then maybe we should just do it because I can’t even fathom the thought of you going home with anyone else.”

“I don’t -”

“I’ve always loved you Y/N, obviously I have. But I’m thinking there’s a difference between loving someone and being in love with someone and I haven’t felt like this in a while and you’re so oblivious.”

“I’m ... I’m not,” you felt your cheeks heating up as you cleared your throat, your palms sweating and your neck feeling itchy. “I’m not oblivious.”

Harry looked up at you, nibbling on his lip as he gave you a bit of a shocked look. “You’re not?”

“I mean, no. No how could I be? I loved waking up this morning. I’ve loved seeing you around whenever I look up. I get a weird uncertain feeling when I think you and Kat are flirting. I want to spend the holidays with you and I’ve always wanted nothing but the best for you.”

“But what? I’m sure you’ve thought this through then considering you aren’t kissing me,” Harry gave a weary smile.

“But I don’t know who you are anymore. I haven’t seen you for so long. I don’t know what you need anymore. I used to know you better than myself, know how to care for you, know how to love you the way you would need it in every circumstance. I used to breathe for you when we were younger and friends. And now ... now I don’t even know what you do during the day when you have time off. I don’t know who your friends are, or what you’ve done in the past years. I don't know if you still have asthma whenever you work too hard or get stressed out. I don’t know if you still need someone to rub your back after you’ve cried or you’ll get awful hiccups. I don’t know if you have the same quirks, nervous habits or daily tendencies.”

“Do you need to know those things?” Harry asked, “Can’t we just grow back together like you were saying moments before?”

“I don’t ... I don’t know. I haven’t allowed myself to even think that way.”

Harry was silent for a moment before nodding, stepping forward with his hands in his pockets as you stood mere centimeters away from one another. “Would you like to get to know me?” Harry whispered, “Because I’d really love to get to know you.”

You couldn’t stop yourself from nodding, biting your lip as you looked up at Harry, your arms wrapped around yourself as you shared a hesitant look. It was merely just a taste as Harry leaned in. It was casual, as if you’d done it a hundred times. His hands were still in his pockets and you kept your arms wrapped around yourself as your lips touched, the feeling of warmth spreading throughout your body as Harry pressed a bit harder against your mouth. 

His hands flew from his pockets, knocking your arms from your body as his hands clutched at your hips, pressing you against the wall as your hands hesitantly but then firmly wove their way into his hair. You gasped at the feeling of Harry against you, his tongue sliding into your mouth as you inhaled the scent of him. 

You were broken from your daze by the ringing of his phone, the sound shrieking through the empty hallway as Harry cleared his throat after pulling away, mumbling an apology before furrowing his eyebrows at the screen. “It’s Robin.”

“You should answer it,” you nodded, placing your hand over your heart in an attempt to help it settle down.

“Hey Robin,” Harry said, smiling softly at you as his hand came to rest on your collarbone, running down your arm and admiring your soft skin. Suddenly, his hand froze and he stepped away from you. “What?” 

He looked worried, his fingers coming up to fiddle with his lower lip as he stepped away again and turned to face the doors to your left. “Is she okay? How bad was it?”

You suddenly got a bad feeling, your hand coming up to rest on Harry’s elbow as he flinched and turned to you, a worried look in his eyes. “Okay. Yeah. Yeah I’ll be home as quickly as I can. Okay. Yeah. Bye.”

“What’s wrong?” you asked immediately as Harry grasped your hand and started walking quickly towards the exit.

“My mum is in the hospital,” Harry mumbled, “There was ice on the road and they were in an accident on their way home.”

“Oh my gosh,” you gasped, following Harry outside without even questioning it, your hand still in his. “You’re going home then.”

“Yeah I want to be there when she wakes up.”

“How much do you know?”

“Some broken bones. Possible concussion,” Harry mumbled, “Shit!” he cried, bringing his hands up to his face, “Shit.”

“Harry.” You quickly were in front of him, the snow falling around you both as you grasped at his hands and pried them from his teary eyes. “Anne is going to be fine. Everything is going to be okay. We’re going to pack our bags and we’ll be home in a couple hours to help take care of her, okay?” You waited for Harry’s response but he just sniffled. “Okay?”

“Okay,” Harry nodded, “Yeah okay.”

“Let’s go to my place first. I can pack a bag quickly and you can grab your stuff and then we’ll go over to yours and you can get your things.”

“You don’t have to come,” Harry sniffled, grasping your hand again as you made your way to his car.

“I’m not leaving you to drive by yourself,” you scoffed, “What kind of friend would I be? Besides, I love Anne and owe so much to her. If she needs help, I’m going to provide it.”

Harry was quiet for a moment, just admiring you before leaning in and pressing a chaste kiss to your lips. “Okay,” he nodded, “Let’s go.”

-----

-----

I can’t thank you all enough for allowing me the time to take after my mother’s death. The holidays were pretty rough, much more than intended, and I needed to take a bit of time just to compose myself. I promise that in now way am I planning on any character dying in this one shot, and Anne will be absolutely okay. But this is merely a plot point to get Harry and Y/N back to Holmes Chapel for more character growth. I hope you all had the best of holidays and I can’t thank you enough for all the kind and loving messages I have received! 

Part 5 HERE. 

[scenestertv]

BeBe Zahara Benet Plus BeBe & Other Winner’s Fest Diaries.                                                 

Revry’s Out Web Fest Closes with Awards and Exclusive Performance by BeBe Zahara Benet Plus BeBe & Other Winner’s Fest Diaries.

Los Angeles – Premier queer global streaming network, Revry, celebrated the closing night of its 3rd annual Out Web Fest (OWF), the first queer web festival celebrating the best in independent LGBTQ digital storytelling.    After opening the fest at YouTube Space LA with the West Coast premiere of the acclaimed HBO documentary film, BELIEVER and celebrating the annual Revry Visibility Awards honoring YouTube sensations Ingrid Nilsen, Miles McKenna, Miles Jai and LGBTQ advocate organization LOVELOUD, the festival rocked on through the weekend at The London West Hollywood hotel with screenings, panels and two Powerhouse Industry Pitchfests.  But the Closing Night Awards was the party not to be missed.  With a diverse group of international winners including DragRace icon, BeBe Zahara Benet for her world premiere video, “Jungle Kitty”, the party went into insanity as BeBe then performed live for the first time her hit “Jungle Kitty” (see Winner’s List below with their Fest Diaries).

“It’s rare to have so many passionate, talented LGBTQ+ international content creators in one space,” said Revry CEO, Damian Pelliccione.  “Over the fest, everyone became a family.   With the stories we share from around the world, truly, it makes you realize how our stories resonate with whatever part of the globe you are from.  That is the reason for this festival and for Revry – sharing our authentic stories from every corner of the globe!”

Out Web Fest asked the international winners and attendee’s to share their experiences at the fest in these Fest Diary Entries.

Out Web Fest Jury Award for Music

JUNGLE KITTY

BeBe Zahara Bebet (from Cameroon)

“It was an amazing weekend.  I was doing other press in NY and then flew to LA to perform at Revry’s Out Web Fest and world premiere my newest video “Jungle Kitty”, very exciting.  I loved how inclusive the experience was at the festival.  It’s important to show more visibility, and there was such a diverse group of artists with so much struggles, different kinds of walks of life and allies.   It was great to see other voices being represented and not be the only one to carry the torch.

There were creators from many countries – artistry is very universal, it is not a nationality thing. I love that fact.  So many amazing stories that need to be shared and the community needs to get behind these stories.   I’m humbled to work with Revry.  With their quality of the content, they give my work a platform and voice.

When I was writing “Jungle Kitty”, the bridge, it’s a frame of mind.  It’s that color of me that is unapologetic, ferocious, not allowing negative energy around me, but about being free and fun.  I don’t want to apologize, not for how I walk, talk or what…this is a universal message of owning our power.  People relate to that, and I’m happy people can feel that way.  To sing my song live on stage at Out Web Fest and see that reaction was really encouraging.

Revry and Out Web Fest have shown such incredible support for the work, and as artists, it is all about the support!”

  Out Web Fest Audience Choice Award

INCONCEIVABLE

Rachel Kirkpatrick (from Canada)

“I just had the best weekend ever. It started at 4:44 am Friday morning when I woke up to take three trains, two flights and a cab ride to get from Vancouver, BC (Canada) to L.A’s 3rd annual Out Web Fest.  After 15 hours of travel I pulled up in my basic yellow cab wearing chucks and a hoodie to the swankiest hotel I had ever seen.

I left my toddler at home with my baby daddy (thank God for co-parenting) so more than being excited for a festival I was excited to only have to clothe, feed and bathe one person for the weekend (me).

I had a number of fantasies about what it would be like to be on the red carpet with cool celebs like Katie fucking Stuart. But none of those fantasies, had me being friends with everyone I met and had me feeling like I left a part of my heart in LA.

I felt like I was going to be a kid in a candy store around so many amazing collaborators and content creators that were way out of my league. But what I didn’t expect was to feel like a celebrity.  I was mostly just grateful and amazed that I got to actually talk to the organizers of the event, and that everyone already knew who we were.  That was utterly surreal.

I got to pitch to 22 Hollywood execs, a story about my life story, and some of them really loved it and gave me their contact info before I could even get through my pitch. I have about 6-7 execs now that I’m excited to establish a connection with.  That’s what I feel the weekend was about; connection.  There is something about sharing your story that is such a vulnerable experience, and when you are around others who are doing the same thing, you automatically meet each other at a level that is just really honest and raw. No one is trying to hide anything.

In this industry, things can be really cut throat and hard, but there was such a sense of humanity at the festival in the stories that we heard and the characters that we witnessed together which made the event have so much HEART. I feel nothing but gratitude for the weekend I just experienced and the LGBTQ2IA community at large. There were so many experiences that were represented on screen that I didn’t realize were shared.

I could not believe that Inconceivable won the Audience Choice award amidst such a talented line-up of series’. Winning was the icing on top of the cake of a perfectly balanced weekend of work and play. It really truly was an honor to be a part of this event. I can’t wait for next year! Thank-you so much Out Web Fest and the Revry team for making this happen and bringing this community of vibrant, and open individuals together. It was such a freaking blast.”

   Out Web Fest Honorable Mention

SEPTO

Alice Carvahlo (from Brazil)

“Being at Out Web Fest was a memorable experience from start to finish. My journey began in December 2017, when Revry CEO Damian Pelliccione announced on the stage of the City of Arts during the Rio Web Fest that SEPTO had been chosen to participate in the Out Web Fest with all expenses paid.

Hollywood is the center of the audiovisual industry.  It is where any creator dreams to be. The name itself, “Hollywood”, attributes like a stamp of quality. It is the reflection of approval in a global seal.  SEPTO participated in festivals in Asia and South America, but the United States was still a closed area for us, unimaginable (precisely because it is everyone’s dream).

From the region in Brazil we came from, it is not common to dream so high. In addition to the discrimination of race, gender and sexual orientation, we also face a daily kind of xenophobia against the culture produced in the northeast of the country. How to dream so high, living so far in a country so full of discrimination and having only two reais in the pocket?

The cold weather we felt throughout our stay was counterbalanced by the warmth of the people, the respect, the kind words and a festival full of diversity in every way. SEPTO was displayed on Saturday and the reviews were very positive.

Sunday, I was asked to announce the fest’s Audience Award (which includes an all expense paid trip to Rio de Janeiro for Rio Web Fest), it was as if I were living that December day again. The internet has brought people together and made dreams possible, whatever their size, and that is beautiful to watch…and to stream.

SEPTO was given an Honorable Mention at the awards.  And after all this, SEPTO returns home with a certainty: the strength of the cinema is really in the collective.  SEPTO will debut in June on Revry. This is the biggest prize!”

  Out Web Fest Powerhouse Industry Pitchfest Winner

Timothy Chesney (from UK)

  ”My journey to LA from the UK nearly didn’t happen. On the way to the airport, me and my partner lost our luggage with our passports and tickets. Looking at each other in horror at the train station, our dream holiday to Los Angeles seemed impossible.  Skip forward a week and I’m in The London Hotel West Hollywood, pitching to industry execs that have been a huge inspiration to me and my career. Thanks to Revry and Out Web Fest, I had the opportunity of a lifetime!

In the U.K, I have recently been commissioned by Sky to write and direct a comedy called Charity Shop Sue along with my twin brother Matthew Chesney and longtime collaborator Stu Edwards. The show features an incredible all female cast starring Selina Mosinski and produced by Spool Films, and BAFTA winners Vicky McClure and Shane Meadows.

This is a really exciting point in my career and I feel extremely lucky that OWF Pitch Fest just so happened to be scheduled during my trip to L.A. The stars were very much aligned.

The top-level industry execs gave me some really valuable feedback on my project. My pitch was for an LGBTQ+ animated comedy show set in a dystopian fantasy world. An important strand of the show looks at non-corporeal identity. I brought business cards, a 1-page pitch, a 10-page pitch book and a 1-minute sizzle reel. You never know what people will think of your ideas. I did feel that they all understood how important this show is to me and my passion and drive to make it happen.

I also got chance to see all the other talented content creators that are part of the Revry’s Out Web Fest programming. It was moving to see such inspiring, brave and authentic work being created across the globe and brought together by Revry.  I can’t deny some pieces made me howl and others choked me up!

At the Sunday evening awards ceremony, me and my boyfriend were chatting with some other guests when I heard my name called out. I was knocked for six and completely didn’t expect to win. I am really looking forward to using the prize of a studio day at Shamrock Productions. I visited the studio recently and can’t wait to return to L.A and utilize the impressive facilities. My mind will be ticking until then to figure out making some magic in that space.

The whole experience has been fully empowering. This is a really important time for LGBTQ+ voices!  I can’t wait to see how we populate the film, TV and music landscape in the near future, with our original, and bold stories.”

  Drama Competition Attendee

STAGE FRIGHT 

Levin Hübner & Fabian Wallenfels (from Germany)

When we received the invitation for Out Web Fest we didn’t hesitate to book our flights – for us small town boys from Germany, an invitation to Hollywood doesn’t come every day!

It always seems a bit boring to state the obvious. Anyway: First Night in LA. Of course we’re standing up there at the Griffith Observatory. And it’s magical: It’s our first time up here, yet we’ve seen this hundreds of times before, together with some of the biggest stars and directors out there. On first sight, LA is just a gigantic, shiny waste of electric power. But looking closer, you start to realize that it consists of millions of smaller lights, and almost all of them are on the move. What an adventure to be one of these small lights wandering through LA for some days!

We always felt that our web series Stage Fright is a universal story and it was great to see that notion confirmed by the American audience appreciating the show. This makes the LGBTQ subculture so special – it’s a community that overcomes borders and language barriers.

Watching the program of Out Web Fest was a tremendous joy – it really striked how the niche has been growing up in recent years and doesn’t have to shy away behind mainstream media. Digital queer content is all about good storytelling and interesting characters, providing a positive representation of LGBTQ life in our society. We were really honored to be selected in such a strong competition with our own web series Stage Fright, and to be part of the Revry family in this shiny city called LA!

It was a crazy trip, coming to LA from Germany for just a weekend, but it was worth every single one of five thousand miles (and even more in kilometers).

Other winners include:

Jury Award for Drama – Jade of Death (Taylor Litton-Strain)

Jury Award for Comedy – Femme (Benno Rosenwald)

Adam Milano

Billie Lee

Austin Rhodes, Aaron Rhodes

Gigi Gorgeous, Nats

Dark Pink Stars AKA Dustin Bochek

Ashlee Marie Preston

Antonio Soto, Leon Wu

Ariana Madix

Gigi Gorgeous

Assaad Yacoub, Dominique

Chris JacobX

Ariana Madix, Tom Sandoval

Chris Rodriguez, Damian Pelliccione, Gigi Gorgeous, Alia Daniels, LaShawn McGhee

Blaire White

Damian Pelliccione, Lance Lowry

Chance Calloway

Billie Lee, Jesse Montana

Giovannie Espiritu

INA_Sheylla, Goncalves

Nor, B Danielle Watkins, Erik Dillon, Serrita Coleman, Onyx Keesha, Dee Hysaw

Charmaine Bingwa

Jacob Dunford, Adam Milano, Lance Lowry

James Butler

Jody Steel

Jesse Montana

Michael Varrati

Lance Lowry

Luciana Bollina, Fernando Belo

Jay Spruell, Mikey Boyd

Jade Hilliard, Jayce Baron, Sampson McCormick

Matt Alber, John Garcia

Nor

Miles Jai

Miles McKenna

Katie Stuart

Noelle Messier

On Mekahel

OWF and Revry Co-Founders, Chris Rodriguez, Damian Pelliccione, Alia Daniels, LaShawn McGhee

Katie Stuart, Rachel Kirkpatrick

Shira Lazar

Rachel David

Ricky Rebel

Shannon Beveridge

Parson James

Alia Daniels_Ryan Mitchell, Damian Pelliccione

BeBe Zahara Benet, Assaad Yacoub

Alice Carvahl, Timothy Chesney, Damian Pelliccione

Alia Daniels, LaShawn McGhee, Katie Stuart, Rachel Kirkpatrick, Chris Rodriguez, Damian Pelliccione

Damian Pelliccione

B Danielle Watkins

Dancer_INA, Dancer Dark Pink Stars

Katie Stuart, Rachel Kirkpatrick, Alice Carvalho, Damian Pelliccione, Dominic Segatti

OWF and Revry Co-Founders Damian Pelliccione_Alia Daniels, LaShawn McGhee, Chris Rodriguez

OWF Buffer Festival Panel_Corrado Coia_Rachel David_Nicola Foti_Shira Lazar

OWF Buffer Festival Panel_Corrado Coia_Rachel David_Nicola Foti

OWF Revry Screening, TBD, Jon Garcia, Matt Alber Colby, Cote Onyx, Keesha Nor, B Danielle Watkins, TBD, Alice Carvalho, Ana Popowicz, Damian Pelliccione

OWF Revry Screening__TBD_Jon Garcia_Matt Alber_Colby Cote_Onyx Keesha_Nor_B Danielle Watkins_TBD_Alice Carvalho_Ana Popowicz_Damian Pelliccione

OWF StartOut Panel: Jade Hilliard, On Mekahel, Lorenzo Thione

OWF StartOut Panel_Ryan Mitchell_Jade Hilliard_On Mekahel_Lorenzo Thione_Jon Brence

The Empress

Bebe Zehara Benet

Alice Carvalho

BeBe Zehara Benet

Tegan Quin

Shira Lazar, Ryan Mitchell

Fabian Wallenfels, Levin Hübner

  About Out Web Fest (OWF)

OWF is the world’s only digital festival dedicated to celebrating web series, short films and music videos by and for the global queer community. OWF’s mission is to provide the opportunity for all queer content creators to connect with the global community and celebrate the progressive evolution of LGBTQ+ entertainment. OWF breaks the mold of other festivals by giving prominence and a voice to the honest and unfiltered digital short-form storytelling that does not rely on access to resources, lofty budgets, or elite “movers and shakers” in the industry.

In the 21st Century short-form content leads as the hottest and fastest growing category in digital entertainment and we believe it is the perfect forum to share multiple perspectives of queer culture that make our stories some of the most innovative, ground-breaking, and unique in the world. OWF introduces international and local digital content creators, producers, and fans to inclusive programming that acknowledges the cultural significance of this revolutionary intersection of medium and storytelling.

This festival will feature screenings, panels with industry experts, and a pitchfest which will allow creators a chance to speak one on one with working industry professionals. The festival will conclude with an awards ceremony and closing night party.  For more information, please visit http://www.outwebfest.com/

About Revry

Revry is the premiere queer digital media network for the inclusive 21st century LGBTQ+ community.  As the first-ever global queer streaming service, Revry offers a uniquely curated selection of domestic and international entertainment that includes iconic, award-winning narrative and documentary films, cutting-edge series and originals along with the world’s largest queer libraries of groundbreaking podcasts, music albums and videos.  Revry is available worldwide on seven OTT, mobile, and online platforms, and hosts an exclusive linear channel on Pluto TV with a reach of over 10 million people in over 100 countries.  Headquartered in Los Angeles, Revry is led by an inclusive team of queer, multi-ethnic and allied partners who bring decades of experience in the fields of tech, digital media, and queer advocacy.  Follow on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram @REVRYTV. Go Online to: www.Revry.com.

Revry’s Out Web Fest PICS + RuPaul DragRace's BeBe Zahara Benet and Other Winner's Fest DIARIES #OutWebFest @Revry #OWF2018 BeBe Zahara Benet Plus BeBe & Other Winner’s Fest Diaries.                                                  Revry’s Out Web Fest Closes with Awards and Exclusive Performance by BeBe Zahara Benet Plus BeBe & Other Winner’s Fest Diaries.