#I treated it as a character study of this woman and how her mind worked otherwise it wouldn't have been enjoyable at all

[artemismatchalatte]

I didn't go online at all yesterday. I self-designated a reading day and finished a book for class (The Good Solider) and one book on my owned TBR (Convenience Store Woman). It bothered me that I didn't have any books done yet for this year. I'm in the middle of three others, with a mind to start maybe one or two more, but still, it feels like very slow going.

[bigification]

Prom King

"We want to welcome you back to Fairway High for your ten year reunion. Come catch up with some old friends and share all the amazing adventures you've had since you graduated! And stick around for a special speech from our Prom King and Queen."

Dan shuddered as he read the email. He had completely forgotten about the stupid reunion. It's funny, he thought, he used to imagine how he would show up to the reunion in a sports car with a perfect bod and high end clothes hugging his muscles. But that was back when he was the most popular football player in his town. Parents adored him, popular teens idoled him, and nerds feared him. Things have changed a lot for Dan since then.

He stared at his half naked body, ravaged by the bad habits of an ex jock. His appetite stayed after he graduated high school, but the exercise didn't last long. He went off to study business in college, as any high school jock did. His time spent at football practice turned to frat parties and junk food, which quickly showed on his waistline. It really put a dent in his once untouched ego, especially once people nicknamed him as 'freshman' fifty. It wasn't quite fifty pounds, at least not in his first year. It sure was well over that by the time he graduated though. And in that time, his clean shaven body had been buried in thick dark hair from head to toe. Although he didn't entirely mind the more mature look, especially once his beard grew in, it complemented his growing gut. Though Dan took another sizable cut to his ego when he started to go bald at the ripe age of 20. Comb overs only lasted him so long, so he started shaving it when he was in his senior year.

He always said it built character, which to be fair, he was far less awful after graduating college than he was in high school. The email only made him remember how awful he was back then. He was the typical jock with his possy of suck up football players who had no personality and the most popular girls. He would torment anyone who was even slightly chubby, or even just smart, they were all beneath him in his mind. How were people gonna react when he shows up to the reunion looking 9 months pregnant and about to burst. It horrified him at the thought of them treating him how he treated them.

Then the horrifying thought hit him, "I'm the Prom King!" He shouted out loud at him in the mirror. Not only would he have to show his face, and gut, he would have to stand on stage in front of his entire graduating year and say a speech about being Prom King. He would be a laughing stock.

"I have to do something about this." He thought.

The reunion was still two weeks away, he could workout, or diet, or maybe buy some clothes that hide his fat. He did a frantic search online but everything just seemed like a scam. He scrolled through page after page of scam supplement and intense workout regimen until he found something interesting. A witch who lived nearby. A witch who specializes in body modifications. It was drastic, but could be crazy enough to work.

Dan contacted the witch with a request to make him into an absolute jock, the kind of man his high school friends would expect him to be 10 years later.

After a bit of back and forth, an appointment was set, and Dan went to bed happy.

The day of the appointment came in a flash. Dan threw on his classic base ball cap to cover his balding head, and dressed in some gym clothes that he thought would look sick on his new hunky body. He excitedly hopped in his car and drove down to the witches house. To his surprise, it was just a regular apartment in a regular apartment building. He was expecting some evil looking house, but seemed less intimidating anyway. He knocked on the door, and he was met with yet another surprise. A petite and nice looking woman wearing all black opened the door.

"Come in darling." Her voice was enchanting. "Sit." She continued in a soft but commanding tone.

Dan sat in a small chair in front of an antique looking table. The raggedy wooden chair creaked under his weight as the witch sat across from him.

"So... You say you want a strong, manly, and attractive appearance?" She asked.

"Yeah."

"Well for what it's worth, you're much more attractive than you used to be." A cold breeze blew past Dan as she spoke.

"Oh... Thank you." His cheeks reddened at the comment.

"I do have to warn you, there are some... dangers to this spell." Her tone darkens.

Dan just raised his eyebrows.

"There are people who feed off of a witch's magic. Now I know how to avoid them, but I will be imbuing this magic into you. So you may have a target on your back from people trying to steal your magic."

"I'm sure I'll be fine."

"Just don't draw too much attention to yourself." The witch warned. "Anyway. I'll get on with it."

She dipped her hands in a small bowl that was laid on the table. "Stand up." She commanded, and Dan followed. She walked around to Dan's side of the table, fingers wet from whatever was in the bowl. She pressed her fingers into his forehead, and it felt like all the tension in his body vanished in a split second. In fact, all feeling seemed to vanish in Dan's body, leaving him stood exactly still. Something about being frozen should have scared him, but he felt a strange sense of calm in the moment.

The witches fingers traced down Dan's face, through his beard and over his soft man tits. She lifted the finger and firmly pressed it back down into his chest. It was like the air was pushed out of his chest as the fat on his moobs collapsed in on itself, leaving his chest completely flat. She then pulled her finger outward, and his pecs grew as she pulled. The muscle swelled until two juicy pecs pressed hard against his tang top. Dan was shocked, he couldn't believe it actually worked, although he still couldn't move.

The witch then traced her finger down to his gut. She laid the palm of her hand against it and pushed, causing his belly to vanish in a second. And once again, she pulled her hand back to form a defined six pack over his flat stomach. She moved her finger around his side, melting away his love handles and giving him a thin waist.

She then suddenly sped up, as if she hit her stride. Her hands gripped Dan's soft arms, and suddenly definition appeared on his rapidly growing biceps. They grew to the size of melons as his shoulders broadened to match. Good thing he wore a tang top or else his sleeves would be in shreds on the floor. Her hands slid down his forearms, doubling their size in the process, and she held his hands, making them so massive they could completely cover his face.

She then bent down and grabbed his thighs, causing them to thicken to the point that Dan couldn't separate them anymore. She thickened his calves as she moved to his feet, making them burst out of his shoes as they grew to a monstrous size 20. As she stood back up, Dan realized the witch stood at eye level to his pecs when they used to be the same height.

The witch then wrapped her arms around Dan's hulking body and cupped his ass cheeks, making them expand into two thick globes of fat that threatened to rip through his shorts. One hand then came back and gripped Dan's dick, making it grow and thicken until it was a massive 10 inches and hanging down his pant leg.

Finally, her hand lifted up to Dan's face, making a few adjustments to match his body. A thicker beard, a sharper jawline, a slightly bigger head to match his much bigger body, and thick brown hair on his head.

Dan gasped as he regained control of his body. He teetered back and forth as he tried to get used to his new body. His legs felt strong, holding up his immense muscle mass with ease. He even struggled to move his arms around at first because it was difficult to move that amount of mass. His meaty hands took a moment to explore his expansive body; bouncing his pecs and his ass, gripping his cock, and even rubbing through the short brown hair that now covered his head.

"How are ya feeling handsome?" The witch broke the silence.

"Are you kidding me, I feel amazing!" Dan flexed, as if to show off his body like a new toy.

"Well I'm glad you like it, now we should talk abou-" the witch was interrupted as Dan basically ran out the door.

"I'll be fine, thank you!" The sound of his voice got quieter as he shut the door behind him.

On his way home, Dan excitedly stopped by a retail store to grab some clothes that actually fit. He confidently strolled in with his tang top riding up his hairy six pack, and shorts that were clearly too small for him. He picked up a few clothes that were big enough to fit him, but small enough to leave little to the imagination about his physique. The clothes weren't exactly pretty, but nobody would care about the clothes when his hunky body was the one wearing them. He even flirted with the cashier on the way out, making his cheeks flush red.

He swiftly made it home and passed out like he had just had the workout of his life.

He woke up the next morning, feeling like he was still in a dream. He shot out of bed as if he'd had three cups of coffee already. This was how he spent every morning leading up to the reunion. Dan was more productive this week than he had been in years. His looks quickly got him a modest following on Instagram, and even on onlyfans after his followers pestered him enough. He reconnected with a bunch of his old friends from high school, just to build a rapport with them before the reunion. And he spent most nights partying and staying the night at some strangers house. By the time the reunion rolled around, it was as if he was the same person he was in high school. Hot, athletic, cocky as hell, and maybe just a bit nicer than he was back in high school. So much for 'building character'.

Before he knew it, it was time to leave for the reunion. He had been prepping for this all week, there was no way he could mess it up now. Dan was meant to be the Prom King. He wore a snug pair of jeans that hugged his ass perfectly, and a grey shirt that showed off his juicy pecs, and finally threw on the letter jacket he wore when he was Prom King ten years prior.

He pulled up to the reunion in his shitty, half broken down car and parked as far out of the way as possible just so no one could see the piece of shit he drove. He pushed open the door to the venue and walked past the crowd of people as if all eyes were on him, because they were. Everyone who was anyone knew who the Prom King was.

He strolled to the back of the stage, so he could get ready for his speech. He stood alone, in silence for a moment, trying to hype himself up. Even after the amazing week he has had, it was the same insecure fat ex jock under there who was scared that everyone would laugh at him onstage. But his moment of silence was interrupted when loud footsteps approached him from behind.

An older man strolls into the backstage, walking right past Dan as if he wasn't there. Dan grimaced as the man got close, seeing the man's large ball belly hanging out of his shirt, which seemed to have multiple buttons popped off. "What is this pig doing here?" Dan couldn't help but think of the old man. The old man promptly sat down in a chair near Dan, leaning back and pulling the shirt up his gut, as if to show it off.

"Who the fuck are you!?" Dan yelled as he got fed up with the old man's antics.

"Oh, you don't know who I am?" The man said as he continued to adjust himself in the seat.

"Why would I know some loser like you, are you the Prom Queens dad or something." Dan scoffed.

"I thought the witch would have warned you about me." The old man's demeanor became more serious.

Dan felt a jolt of fear run down his spine. How does he know about the witch?

"Oh I bet she did." The man started to laugh. "But all the attention online and the sex and the porn, oh the porn was so good." The man grunted as he rubbed his crotch. "You just couldn't resist being popular!"

Dan only grew more afraid as the man monologued.

"I am going to enjoy this." The old smiled as he got up from the chair.

"Enjoy what?" Dan questioned as he tried to back away, but couldn't. Why couldn't he back away. The old man grew closer and closer, but no matter how much Dan wanted to run, he remained frozen in place. The man placed his finger on Dan's forehead, causing a blue light to escape from his body and enter the man's body.

Dan watched helplessly as the man's arms grew to the size of melons, his biceps bursting through his sleeves. Meanwhile, all Dan could feel was his sleeves becoming looser as his arms deflated. The man's moobs shrunk into a solid pair of pecs as Dan looked down to see his chest swell until he was left with two soft man tits. The man's ball gut got smaller and smaller as fat piled into Dan's stomach, leaving him with a heavy gut that spilled under his shirt. The man's pants grew tighter and tighter as thick muscles filled his thighs and juicy fat perked up his ass. Dan felt weak as his legs became more fat than muscle, he even felt the bulge in his pants shrink as he watched a thick bulge appear in the man's pants.

As if that wasn't enough, Dan watched on in horror as the man's face ages down from 60 down to 30. His wrinkles melted away as Dans became dry and wrinkly, his face thinned out as Dan's became rounder and chubbier, and his hair gained a light brown colour as Dan's thinned out and became white. The man pulled off his shirt to reveal a forest of dark hairs sprouting all over his body as a bushy bread covered his face. Meanwhile Dan can feel his face go cold from the much thinner facial hair.

As the transformation came to an end, the man flexed as he felt the energy course through him.

Dan once again let out a gasp as he regained control of his body, though this time his voice was much deeper and gruffer. Dan panicked as he ran his hands through all of the new rolls of fat on his body. He even stumbled back as he adjusted to the weight of his gut.

"What did you do to me!?" Dan yelled.

"Oh you did this to yourself buddy, y'know how easy it was to find you." The man responded, sounding almost exactly like you used to.

"You made me fat." Dan's voice breaks.

"Oh I did so much more than that, check the camera in your phone old man." The man smiled, as if he was containing his excitement.

Dan dreadfully pulled out his phone and opened the camera app.

Dan shed a tear as he saw the fat old man staring back at him through his phone's camera. His gut was bursting out of his jacket and his hair was nearly as thin as it was before his initial transformation.

"And if you don't mind I'll be taking that." The man grabbed the letter jacket off of Dan and put it on himself.

The man confidently strutted towards the stage, ready to give his speech as Prom King, but Dan wasn't ready to give up that easily. His footsteps were heavy as he followed the man onstage and grabbed his arm.

"You're not gonna take this away from me!" Dan yelled.

This was followed by a moment of silence as the crowd went awkwardly quiet. Everyone's eyes were once again on Dan, but it didn't feel like before.

"Ooohhh, that was embarrassing old man." The old man whispered to Dan before approaching the mic. "I'm sorry everybody, my dad is just a bit jealous that I'm in my glory days and he's not." The man says to the entire venue, then turns to you once again. "Isn't that right, dad? " He said as he pressed his finger into Dan's chest.

Dan froze once again. This time, memories flooded into his brain. Memories of him growing old, never reaching the happiness and popularity he had in high school. He even had a son, and named him Dan jr. after himself of course. Though his son would grow to top him in all of his achievements, including becoming prom King back when he was in high school. Dan Sr. finally decided to swallow his pride and let his son have the spotlight. He slowly waddled off to the side and watched as his son gave his speech as Prom King.

[valentine-cafe]

God- I need to be that touchy feely ass bestie to the 781 trio 😩

The bestie who:

Finds Rishen in the ECU Library, sneaking behind her, arms wrapped around her pretty waist, and pressing a light kiss on her ear as we listen to her explain a few problems she needs help with. Like the besties we are, we help her with some of her uni work, with a hand gently rubbing on her hip before pulling away to go find Talisen, unaware of the beautiful blush on her cheeks

Finds Talisen just arriving to his shared dorm, tired from rehearsals. He invites us in, plopping onto his bed as we make him some relaxing tea. Then we give him a little massage, hands caressing every tense muscle, so soft and intimate. Lips brushing against the edges of his ear oh so slightly as we whisper praises about how hard working and creative he is, before kissing his cheek as we left for the last boyo, his body growing oh so slightly warm as we depart.

Finds Alessio in his apartment, grinning up at us as we sit on his lap, happily recounting our encounters with Rishen and Talisen. Hands playing with his black, wavy hair before we suggest making something for the other two. Pulling him by his belt loops to the kitchen as we make snacks.....and as he bends down slightly to get something from his fridge......💥🤚 SMACK AGAINST HIS ASS! Shock momentarily fills him as he looks upon us, a challenging smirk on our lips before we run. He quickly regains his composure, before letting out a hearty chuckle as he tracks us down. Ready to give us a taste of our own medicine.

Just a lil sum Ive been thinking of 👉👈

-🌕

˖⁺. “ we're just friends right? ” : 

﹙ preppy nerd, literature poet & punkgoth x gn reader ﹚.𖹭 ݁

. . . verse 781 rishen, talisen, alessio x gn reader !! 🍓 :  ﹙ rishen: hero ˖ preppy nerd ˖ moth-spider-mantis character ˖ talisen: poet ˖ grim reaper ˖ naga character ˖ alessio: antihero ˖ immortal ˖ mercenary ˖ punkgoth character ﹚

you're the best friend of the trio - just friends right? even when you get touchy with rishen at the library, give talisen a little massage and crawl yourself into alessio's lap . . . 

﹙ cws ﹚: none ! | wc : 3.3k

﹙ receipts ﹚: this request ended up being so sooooo long but you know what it was necessary because GIIIDDDD YOU GIVE US SOOO MUCH INSPO !! here it is !

꒰  other treats : guidelines ˖ m.list ˖ characters ˖ our lore  ꒱

She sat there across the hallway, all alone. Why not join her? See what ails her.

Those were the exact thoughts that drove through your mind as your footsteps click behind you. Other people who were busy with their own studying look up from their books for a moment to watch you walk over to the woman by the end of the library hall. Before they look back down into their homework like she is doing.

She seems quite frustrated with it. One hand by her forehead to support it, while thick, dark brown brows knit and curl at the qustions on the sheet.

Rishen loves when the homework gets complicated. Usually — Because it makes her mind work. However when she’s struggling to stay focused, the answer to the question is usually overstimulated senses. Mind disturbed by the packed study in the library. The heat emanating from the bodies all around.

A groan of anger cuts through the murmurs and whispers of people conversing or reading aloud to themselves. The pencil that previously laid in her hand flung across the roundtable. Hands instead finding her head to support.

“Oh Rishen.” You sigh out, watching as her head shoots up from the hands it had just comforted itself in. The dark circles beneath maroon hues are clearer than day. What other action can you take, than to gently wrap your arms around your friend and pull her and the homework away from the table. To find a quieter space.

The two of you would walk together, in search for a place peaceful enough for the distressed student to sit.

You pass by shelves full of books that reach the ceilings of the library. Tall and proud. As librarians make their way around them, in search for books or spots for books to be returned to.

Fortunately, after much investigation, you would find a spot. Secluded from noise and people, smells and uncomfortably straining light. The area itself feels protected by a soothing aura of sorts.

Settling down, your ears catch a pair of lungs inhaling, before exhaling a very heavy and tired sigh. As another body slumps against yours and eases.

Rishen’s hands hold the homework she was previously trying to do in them once again. None of her fingers are clenching around the sheet for dear life anymore, though. Now they only rest on the slight crinkle of the paper they had previously caused.

Taking a moment to shift into her sear, she runs tongue swipes across her top teeth for a moment, the fanged ones biting down on the pink muscle gently, before it clicks. “That was a mess,” she laughs, shaking her head.

Soft eyes scan away at your features, and in turn, you put your hand upon her hip and rub gently and press a kiss to the shell of her ear, nuzzling your head against hers as your return your gaze to the homework.

“What are you studying?”

“Just biochem,” The room goes quiet for a moment, as she observes it. Peaceful it is indeed, dark oak wooden walls, with the marble floor that the entire university is covered in. The windows only let in a bit of light, with green hues and softer yellows thanks to the trees that cover the sun from outside.

She guesses the two of you have found one of Talisen’s beloved spots, none would tend to the flowers and plants scattered around the room. It is incredibly comforting and it brings smiles to your lips.

“Usually I’d get this done quick, but the surroundings were frustrating me.” She murmurs, to break the short beat of silence.

“I’m just trying to figure out the last few questions here on enzyme kinetics. It’s the latest topic in the class.”

With a reassuring squeeze to her hip, you smile in wonder, trying to read through the sheet and find the answers to it.

“Need some help?”

“Honestly? I wouldn’t mind.” She chuckles, while she tries so hard to not clear her throat at the feel of your body against hers. The way your hand feels as it rubs soothing circles on her hip has her flaring up. Yet you notice nothing.

Or maybe you do? She’s never too sure with you.

Though after a while of help, she finally found the conclusive answer, and sighs out in relief as homework is finally done.

“Thank you, this means I can go do my research again.”

You laugh in response to her words, tilting your head with a grin plastered on your face. “Not even gonna take a break for some food?” Immediately after the words left your mouth, a loud, grumbling sounds from her stomach. Indicating that she does indeed need something to eat.

Sheepishly she looks at you, while her hand moves up to rub at the back of her neck. “Ah— ahh hah, I guess you’re right.”

As the two of you get up from your seats, you inform her that you will be going again. She tries to call out for you, wanting you with her to the cafeteria, but within the blink of an eye, you are well on your way again to find the poet that you both love so dearly.

Hallways are a blur to you. As you quickly beeline your way through each and every one of them, exiting the university grounds to get to the dorm.

Like a snake, you slither around and about students to get to your destination. Something inside of you knew where you would find the man, after today’s literature class was cancelled because Prof. Lene had to call in sick.

Which meant he had probably rehearsed an extra few hours in the day to make sure that he has everything pitch perfect for the upcoming musical the university is hosting. Moulin rouge, having the hefty task put into his hands of playing the male lead.

Indeed, you find him in the dorm, after knocking onto the door and awaiting response from the other side.

Slow footsteps drag across the floorboards, as the door suddenly swings to the side after Talisen placed his tech-key against it. He tiredly meets your eyes with his, lashes fluttering as he processes your presence.

“You over rehearsed again.” You huff and as you look up at him for an answer, your hands find your hips to try and make it a bit clearer for him that you are actually here and it isn’t one of his daydreams again.

Realisation doesn’t take too long to hit the man. Like a slap across the face, he wakes up at the sight of you. Well— somewhat, at the very least. Yet, enough to draw a loud laugh out of him, that sends warmth through your system. The familiar sound a lovely one. Like soft bells chiming in the evening, playing with the wind.

“Now, do not be huffy with me, mooncake.” He chuckles, running a hand down his face, before waving it at you to follow him inside of the dorm. Shoulders creeping upwards as a quiet yawn escapes into the room.

It is ever contagious, as you yourself open up your mouth to yawn and close the door behind you. Greeting your beloved little fluff-ball Beauregard as he runs over to you. Tail high in the sky and shaking excitedly, as he meows enthusiastically at the sudden appearance of your presence.

Meanwhile, the grim reaper that you have come to visit seems to only find his way back to the bottom bunk he sleeps in. Little noises of exhaust leave him, before he takes in a deep breath and stretches.

Has he made sure to drink today? You ask yourself, while looking around the dorm. The walls carry a softened tone of melancholy, as if his emotions has been sucked up by them like sponges that needs to be wringed. So that the sadness may be drained in the wash.

Fortunately for the poet, you know just how to help him. If a floating lightbulb was above your head, people would watch it blink and glow

“. . . Some tea?” You ask quietly.

With the small turn of his head, half of his face meets yours, eyes droopy and full of sleep. Talisen musters up the best response he can. A simple one more than anything: “Please?”

The little smile he recieves after his plea has his slow-beating heart stuttering. Good thing you don’t have super hearing, you might have caught the hitch in his breath.

It only took a few minutes to finish off the tea for him. Yet you hope he has not fallen asleep by the time you exit the kitchen — ah, regardless, he needs the sleep.

Once you had exited the kitchen, you find your way back to his bunk to place the freshly brewed cup of tea down on his elaborate bedside table.

Maroon eyes open to watch as you put it down next to him, and suddenly, he begins sitting himself up.

“Ah wait just a bit Tal, it’s still piping hot.” You attempt, gently helping him back down on the bed. “Let me give you something as it cools a bit.”

Confusion strikes his expression at your words, pulling a small hum of amusement from you, while your hands find their way on his back and slowly begin loosening any of his tense spots. It causes him to groan out with relief, his back flexing in response to the touch. While he buries his head in his arms.

“You are too sweet for me.” He whispers quietly, enjoying the feel of your hands smoothing out any knots that he has collected from the last few days of hard work and training. If only you knew how much more the gesture meant.

“You deserve it,” You whisper. Leaning down against his back, while your hands move down to massage at his hips and the sides of his thighs. The feel of your lips against his cheek brings his heart to a race with his mind. Whether or not turn and meet them with his. It would not be appropriate would it?

“Hardworking, so good at your little rehearsals Tal.”

Oh the things you do to him, it isn’t fair. You watch as he hides his face away in his arms. Face redder than a tomato.

“Oh come on,” you laugh softly, while moving your hands up to his arms, massaging at the aching biceps that flex slightly whenever you hit a point it almost hurts to be massaged. You pull small sounds and whines from him. “Come on Tal, say it. Hm? What are you?”

“I’m good at what. . .”

“You’re good aaaat?” You encourage, grin widening than it has been for a while.

“I am good at what I do. . .” The sound almost sounds like a little cry, as his body relaxes. A shy smile twitching at his lips.

Eventually, the two of you take a little break, where the poet can have some his tea to sip on, while you get a glass of water and some more lotion for his back.

The fresh taste of strawberries covers his tongue and soothes his throat after all of the strain he has done on his voice. Nevermind the warmups that he had done, it always got a bit sore after all of the practiced lines and notes he has to shift his voice to when he sings. But he loves it.

You notice the small shifts he makes once your hands reach the small of his back after smearing out the lotion to help you massage properly, an eyebrow quirked at the small noises he so clearly holds back.

“Is it tickling?” The question sounded a bit more teasing than it was supposed to, but it was genuine.

“I have a very sensitive back.” He sighs out in response, clearing his throat to apprehend a shiver that rudely threatens him to make its way down and up his spine. “You— You have done so much for me today already dear, I feel better now, thank you.”

Watching as he sits up, you smile and tilt your head in a small nod of acknowledgment.

“You need some sleep?” After your question, the man yawns and nods. Your gaze softens as his arms wrap around the pillow that supports his head and his cat jumps up on the bed. Dragging the blanket over his body before snuggling close to him.

Soft lips find his skin before the departure, warmth against ice cold skin that results in long fingers slithering up your arm to pull you close and press a kiss to your own cheek. You smile lovingly and brush his hair back and trace your thumb over his brow.

“Take it easy, yeah?”

“Mmm. . .” He hums, watching as you grab your belongings and make your way out of the dorm, turning off the light. Making your way to your last spot for the day.

The city streets are swept from people this day, you assume most have gone to see the annual opening of the ice skating festival for the year.

Walking felt shorter than usual, as you found yourself standing by Alessio’s apartment door already. You suppose it was the quiet of the streets and the music in your ears that took away the attention of the usual duration of the walk.

He opened up the door quickly after you knocked on it.

Though. . . he wasn’t standing in the doorway, rather laying a few feet away from it. Pressing on the button of his phone to unlock it. As he sat and played his video games, locked in, trying to defeat the boss plaguing him in his dark souls play through.

“Aye— AYE!! AYE C’MON MAN!” He yells out in frustration, his noise of anger followed by a groan and then laughter, as he throws his head back and sighs. Looking over at the door where you stand, ridding yourself of your jacket and scarf, shoes placed next to his.

Emerald eyes move along your movements towards him, his legs spreading a bit to let you straddle him.

“Lookin’ pretty today huh?” The whistle reaches your ear before his words do. What else can you do but roll your eyes at him with a grin spreading across your face for the third time this day. You would be getting smile pains and aches at this point.

The same controller that had previously been in his hands was discarded of quickly the moment you sat in his lap and looked down at him with a smile. They instead found purchase on your waist, giving it a little squeeze that has you squirming and delivering a small dash to his chest with the back of your hand.

“Then you haven’t seen Rishen and Talisen, today.” His eyebrows raise at your words, looking for more answers clearly. Why not tease him a bit by remaining silent until he asks further on what you mean?

A second after noticing what you are doing he sends you an unimpressed look, sighing out dramatically and grinning: “What do you mean by that huh?”

“They were both so tired, but sooo pretty.” You sigh and slump your shoulder. Looking down at him with your head tilted to the side.

“Rishen was frustrated and in need of a calmer space in the library, where he could finish his studies,” Taking a break, you lean down against Alessio and rest your head on his chest. “And Talisen was tired after rehearsals, so I helped him with a nice massage and some tea.”

“You could massage me a bit.” The mercenary jokes, poking at your forehead and grinning. Earning another dash before you grab him by the loops of his pants and pull him up from the couch.

“My hands are tired unfortunately, but not enough to make some snacks.” You chuckle, folding your arms as the man saunters over to you with a big frown on his lips. He’s giving you those fake puppy eyes again, you know Talisen gave him a massage the other day.

You decide to play around with the man and coo at him, tell him he has it sooo hard. Before tugging at him once more, dragging him with to the kitchen to make something good to eat.

To your luck. Talisen had refilled Alessio’s fridge to the brim, veggies and tofu, meats, fruits that have been cut out for cooking. A darling, he was. You sometimes wondered when these two were gonna get married. Every time you teased them, they’d proclaim loudly and clearly of their frienemyship.

They were no lovers. The two were with Rishen, and not the other! Rishen would be just as tired as you were each and every time there was any mention of it. The word: frenemy, specifically.

With a swift pull of the drawer in the fridge, you pull of some of the silken tofu and veggies, bringing it onto the kitchen island. Eyes shining at Alessio, as you begin cutting up some of the onions to caramelise on the pan.

The two of you work around one another, as he begins preparing the tofu for the air fryer, applying the last bit of crumbs to the fried chicken replica tofu. And just as he reaches and opens up the fridge once more to reach down and grab some milk for the dipping you’re making in the pan, you cannot help yourself. . .

Slap, the sound of your hand coming to contact with his ass reverbarates off of the walls. His eyes blown wide and jaw slack.

Slowly, his head turns, for his gaze to meet you over his shoulder. Lips thinned together as you restrain yourself from bursting into hard laughter. And you watch as he turns off the heat on the pan and nods slowly with a small smile of warning on making it’s presence on his features.

“Oh yeah?” The silence fills the room once more, as he begins power walking towards you. While you run out of the kitchen and away from his as fast as possible. Until his loud footsteps thump against the floor, chasing after you.

And when he has a grasp on you too. You feel the soreness creeping up on you the second his hand has whipped across your cheeks. A loud yelp and whined laugh leaving you.

“Alessio!”

“Don’t start, you began this!”

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[eatmeandbirthmeagain]

hello! a little fic request I’ve been thinking on, not pressuring you to write it or anything, just wanted to share.

the y/n is a hot tempered foreign princess who got married to Baldwin when they were both children. she’s very energetic, straightforward, man-like in her character, but has to adapt to fit in the court of Jerusalem and also to „suit” her husband’s calm manner and the fact that he’s ill doesn’t help.

she’s unhappy about it; maybe even tears a little during the wedding, but doesn’t let anyone to think she may be vulnerable (mostly because she understand that that can be used against her in the future after Baldwin dies). but over the time she finds herself drawn to Baldwin because, well, unlike her teachers, he lets her study and play chess with him. he cares about her desires and interests. he also respects her, not just like a woman but as a friend, and a clever one. maybe some of her advice on the politics is used by him at some point (which would be absolutely unrealistic, but really, we’re talking historical romance with a leper king here…). a cute detail would be him gifting her a weapon of some sort to protect herself because he knows how she doesn’t like being treated like she’s helpless. bonus points if he says something romantic and or pathos’y about it.

did I write this whole oc story as a multiple chapter fanfiction in my head? yes, I did. am I going to finish it? absolutely no. but I’d love to read your interpretation!

♧ "Princess" - King Baldwin x Reader ♧

♧ Angst ♧

A/N: Hello Anon! So sorry for taking so long to write this, ive had so many requests. I'm not sure if this is what you had in mind but it was my interpretation and I hope you like it! I dont really like how it turned out as your request had so much detail and my writing does that no justice, but I hope its okay ☺️! As always, this is based on the film Kingdom Of Heaven, not the real historical figgures. This is also set pre-film. Enjoy!

TW: Leprosy

At thirteen years old, marriage was the last thing on young y/n’s mind. But yet, here she was. Soon to arrive in the city of Jerusalem, to be wed to a boy she had only ever met a handful of times.

Baldwin the fourth. The leper, who's mother just so happend to be ready to find him a wife at the same time her father was ready to find her a husband.

She sat in silence for the entire journey, this was uncommon for her. She usually always had something interesting to say or something to observe with curiosity. But as per request by her father, from now on she “had to act like a proper lady. No more of this ridiculous 'masculine' behavior”.

“You will be wed to a king y/n” he had told her. “You must stop acting the way you do. No king will be allowed such behavior from his wife”. 

Her attempt to keep to herself for the journey had been successful so far. She remained silent and still. Just as her mother taught her. “Just how a lady should be”. 

As the city came into view, y/n felt tears begin to burn her eyes. She would never again be allowed to explore the wilderness on her fathers land, or read every book she was allowed to have from the library. She surrendered herself to a life of boredom and suppression. 

Once exiting the carriage, she was greeted by the royal officials as well as the king's mother.

“I am so pleased to finally meet you young lady" she greeted her with a smile "you shall make a fine wife for my son” . Y/n thanked her and was ushered off quickly to prepare her for the hour of the wedding.

Y/n held back tears as servants worked busily around the room. Dressing her in beautiful garments, jewelry, and makeup. She was distraught. But she dare not cry. They could not see her so weak.

----------------------

The events proceeded and y/n barely even looked at the boy she was marrying. She could not bring herself to make eye contact with the man who would rule her life forever.

They told her to smile. “No man wants to see a lady disappointed on her wedding day” the king's mother had told her before they entered the church.

Baldwin himself was nervous about this day but just enthusiastic. Unlike y/n, he was looking forward to being wed to a young woman. He did not want just a wife to serve him, but a companion too. Someone who he could speak to about all kinds of things. Someone who would love him as much as he loved them. When he saw her, she looked beautiful, but sad. Very sad.

He hoped she was not sad about marrying him. Perhaps his illness deterred her from wanting to even be near him.

But she was still beautiful. She was 14, just like him. He could not take his eyes off her. He had met her a few times before, and she interested him deeply, even though they barely spoke. He more so just watched her play and talk with the other young people from his bedroom chamber window, longing to join them if it was not for his illness.

She played more with the young boys than she did with the girls. Always full of energy and life, always talking and laughing. But now, she looked different. As if the light had been drained from her. 

--------------------

When the wedding was over, the young king and queen got acquainted in the boy's chambers. She still seemed very quiet and unsure about his presence.

“Are you alright?” He asked her the second they were alone. “Yes your highness” she replied in a small voice, very different to the excitable tone she used to have. She sighed and lowered herself onto the small couch, turning away from him to look at her hands.

Baldwin thought for a moment, but then remembered that his mother requested he chose a wedding gift to present her after the affairs.

“I have a gift for you,” he said happily, lightening the mood.

He noticed her eyes light up a little at the comment. “You do?”

“Yes, would you like to see it?”

Y/n nodded excitedly, a smile forming on her face for the first time all day. The boy stood and disappeared behind the red, satin curtains that covered the large windows. He returned a few seconds later with something behind his back and a wide smile.

"I had to hide it, so my mother did not see what I chose for you" he explained. This peeked y/n's intrest greatly.

“Alright, close your eyes, '' he told her, the smile still plastered to his face. Y/n shut her eyes with anticipation. When he told her to open her eyes, she was lost for words. In the young king's bandaged hands, he held a shining silver sword with a pale pink ribbon tied around the handle.

Her eyes widened and stared at the sword for a long time before taking it in her hands to admire it. “Do you like it?” he asked, cautiously, hoping he had not offended her.

“Baldwin.. I love it!!” she exclaimed with a grin, jumping to her feet and wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him into a tight hug. The smile returned to his face and he put his arms around her waist.

“Now you can defend yourself my love. No wife of mine will be left vulnerable, even if there are men to protect her. She will defend herself, because she is strong.” His words filled the queen with happiness and hope. Perhaps her father was wrong after all and she could remain as herself. At least in the presence of her husband. 

-------------------

From that day on, they were inseparable. Unlike y/n’s tutors and parents, he allowed her access to his entire private library so they could study and read together. He allowed her time to herself, so she could do the things she loved without anybody telling her how to behave.

He quite often went as far as to seek her out for advice on political issues, not allowing her straightforward intelligence to go to waste.

Overtime, y/n became used to her duties as queen, but as much as she learnt to fit the role, she treasured her time alone with Baldwin. He cared about her interests, her desires. He respected her, more than anyone else ever had. They played chess together as well, each game being a delightful battle of the mind.

He saw her as not just a wife, but as a companion and an intelligent one at that. And for this, she would be forever greatful.

[z-and-the-space-child]

my head is all currently midnight burger podcast so here's everything i like about this wonderful piece of media:

it's pretty fun and very funny!! i smile like an idiot on public transport and on my way to class at least once a day listening to this.

the characters are so. idk how to describe them but theyre so full of life and you can tell that they are loved greatly by the creator(s)

the WRITING. i could seriously pluck a quote from damn near every episode to carry me through the day. i don't need affirmations i need gloria to talk me through my problems.

i was doing a lil analysis of the themes in this show and i came up with "the best thing you can ever do is the best thing you can do right now" and it is FUEL, babey.

The el triste monologue. also just gloria being a POC and being proud of herself and her culture. there's a lot of cultural mish-mash in podcasts, so this is very refreshing.

It's very, very sweet and heartfelt. kind of like wolf 359 if they communicated more instead of dodging their issues until they came to a peak (love them for it.)

the PHYSICS of it all. i'm a physics/astrophysics major because i think space and looking at the stars is my lifeblood so i won't shut up about it. i don't want ava and leif (certainly ava) to shut up about it ever. HOW much reasearch did they have to do to get this kinda grasp on it. im in awe, i'm LEARNING actual things from them. i could go on. the gravity waves, the stellar nuclear fusion, the time dilation of it all. and all without using over-flowery language!!! i can actually follow a good chunk of the time. are we sure ava didn't take one of those science communication seminars. maybe 5 phds does it. when she and leif talk i vibrate like an electron in a lazer. wonderful.

star sequencing??? stellar nucleosequencing??? right up my alley. thats my kinda stuff. the romanticization of space, i've seen. the romanticization of physics, however, is not something i haven't seen in such a beautiful modern fashion. (Ie, not oppenheimer or even richard feyman)

and it's not too science-y to the point that they think they can't have fun. yes they discuss the implications of gravity waves and wax poetic about space and pulsars. (it beats for you, berts) but they have FUN! they meet their parents because they can. they get a plant drunk. there's an atmosphere(?????) around the diner that allows them to fly around and mind-numbing speeds and look at the curvature of spacetime and also sit on the roof. (I imagine the entire place is the temperature of a summer night.) they have a whole wild west planet. leif builds things inexplicably. how? where does he get the materials??? shhhhh don't question it just let him have the gravity wave detector. nobody actually knows what engineers do, not even engineers. let him be. also time crystals??????

ALSO ava being a woman in stem and being so blunt yet covert about it. she's been dealing with it for so long. why are all (recognized) physicists a)white b) men c) both. it's such a sucky thing to work into because of the outward appearance. ava is a proud mad scientist which i aspire to so much. i am keeping her in my little arsenal of people to think about when i don't want to study. (picture the do it for her meme but it's pics of ava) I don't think i aptly put how much i love her. i'm not all the way finished yet but i've heard she was forced to marry someone? i think it would be a thing for sure if she cheated on him. so many physicists cheated on their spouses (wives ): ) and i think ava should also do it. as a treat. if that's what she'd like.

when people have done bad, bad things but show/are capable of redemption upon reflecting on their past/current shortcomings is just something that gets me so much directly in the heart. the hiddenness of people. the tragedy. we contain MULTITUDES and this show demonstrates that so well. how they support each other! they are everchanging and that's good for them. Leif the engineer the ex criminal the diner cook.

leif exploding a man in cold blood. if i could draw i'd draw that. maybe i will anyways.

food as a form of affection/way to bond. grief. doing your best. making amends. using the time you have. death is inevitable but that's okay.

And if time and tide roil you too harshly, or diurnal courses leave you with no safe havens, just remember we’re out there, somewhere, lookin’ for ya’

they open at six

[natasha-in-space]

Thank you for your previous work. I was wondering if you could write a headcanon of RFA (excluding Saeyoung, as you have already done him) and Saeran with MC. In this scenario, chaos follows MC everywhere without any logical reason, but REMINER IT DOESN'T HARM MC, ONLY THE PEOPLE AROUND HER. This ability also runs in her family, so if they have a gathering, chaos happens without fail. Additionally, I have a funny scenario in mind where Saeran kidnaps MC to Mint Eye, and as a result, chaos ensues, but MC casually escapes. I search Kofuku and I see some similarities but the idea of MC having this "ability" is actually come from an Disney Show called Milo Murphy's Law

Yoosung

I feel like the poor guy will get rather spooked by this strange ability of yours. He's already prone to getting into some very embarrassing situations without any external force pulling the strings. Do you mean to tell him that he'll have to deal with even more disasters in his daily college life!? It's more humorous than serious, though. He may act a bit startled by it at first, but he's definitely the type to get very curious despite his initial reservations. It baffles him how such a thing could actually happen in reality, and not in fiction. Is it appropriate for him to call you a superhero...? He'll also probably want to try and use this ability of yours for his advantage. Not anything bad... But, hey, maybe, just maybe... you could make his professor miss his bus today? He has no desire whatsoever to study for the philosophy test tomorrow morning.

Zen

Zen is able to take it all in stride. He won't be shocked by this revelation of yours, as he has a few unique abilities himself. It's actually kind of exciting for him to meet someone in a somewhat similar situation to his own. Though, your little quirk is far more chaotic than he would expect. It's a good thing he has supernatural healing powers and prophetic dreams on his side! He will be able to avoid most adversity coming his way, and, even if he does get injured, he will probably be strutting down the street without a fuss after a day or two. He'll also be very fussy about you not blaming yourself for anything. He actually finds your bad luck kind of cute! At any rate, that's what he asserts to you.

Jaehee

To put it simply, she is stumped. Since she's the most logical person in the group, she'll have trouble believing you at first. Not until she encounters the undeniable proof of your ability with her own two eyes. Out of everyone in the RFA, having bad luck following this poor overworked woman will probably make you feel especially bad for her. Much like Yoosung, she'll get rather spooked once she accepts it as reality. I could see her beginning to steer clear of you even. She's already so incredibly stressed... the last thing she needs is even more trouble on her hands. She does mellow out once she sees that you are a genuinely good person, though. She'll even apologize to you for acting rashly with you. It's possible that you and Jaehee could find ways to overcome this cursed quirk of yours.

Jumin

Without a doubt, the most enthralled among all. You might think he'll be the most skeptical one of the bunch, but no. This is a man who has a huge infatuation with the occult we're talking about here. Once he sees actual tangible proof, you have a real annoying observer on your hands. Will ask you dozens and dozens of questions, do his own research in his free time, maybe even ask you to provide him some of your blood samples or something. With your consent, of course. It may become too much to handle for you. But, what you don't need to worry about is Jumin avoiding you or treating you as a threat. He makes it a point to let you know that he will not judge your character based on factors that are out of your control. With his resources, you might even come to learn more about your abilities!

Saeran

He'll be anxious. Much like his brother, but in a more subdued manner. I feel like your constant bad luck would be one of the factors that pushed Ray into choosing you, believe it or not. He can relate to bad things happening around you, while all you can do is watch helplessly. He will also take the effects of your bad luck in stride. Almost to a fault. You'll have to remind him to please take care of himself and not put himself in harm's way because of you. Suit Saeran, on the other hand, will curse you and your ability. He'll definitely think that you are doing it on purpose. That you want him to suffer. He'll ensure that you understand your position beneath him. He hates the feeling of losing control, and that's exactly what drives him mad about you and your stupid bad luck that he can't control, no matter how hard he tries. He will apologize to you for blaming it all on you, though. You can expect him to tell you that he has come to the realization that you had no intention of harming him, and that you possess a good heart. A heart that is too great for someone as dark and rotten as he is. GE Saeran will be way more balanced about it all. It'll take you two some time to figure it out, with him not putting too much pressure on himself, and you not worrying too much about harming him. Maybe you could develop a working system between you two that will help you keep disasters to a minimum, while also having a reliable plan for any accidents that may inevitably occur.

[asordinaryppl]

A3! Main Story: Part 4 - Act 16: Crossing Paths - Episode 18: Someone I Used To Know

Tsumugi: Good morning.

Staff: Good morning.

Director: Good morning.

Tsumugi: I look forward to working with you today as well.

Director: I’m so glad you accepted, Tsukioka-kun. I look forward to watching your acting today too.

Tsumugi: I don’t have much experience with acting in films. I’m still feeling my way around, but I’ll do my best.

Ryota: Tsumugi-san, good morning!

Tsumugi: Good morning, Ryota-kun.

Ryota: Look, look, I got up to here on the problems I couldn’t solve yesterday!

Tsumugi: Woah, that’s amazing.

Ryota: But these exercises just take so long…

Tsumugi: Then let’s try to find a different way to solve them later.

Ryota: Okay!

Tsumugi: Good for you, it’s impressive how you can study in between takes.

Ryota: Meh, I like doing both, so I don’t mind!

Tsumugi: That’s amazing. I have to follow your example and do my best, too.

-

Staff: We’re filming now. Aaand, action!

Tsumugi: “Do you have proof?”

Ryota: “... Will you believe me if I show you this? It’s Mom and Dad’s wedding ring.”

Tsumugi: “… Then, you really are my kid from the future?”

Staff: Cut! We’re checking it now!

Tsumugi: (Maybe I should have done this part differently.)

Staff: OK!

Tsumugi: (Ah, I can’t run through it again. But I wonder if it’s good the way it is?)

Tsumugi: …

Tsumugi: (It really is different from how a play comes together. I wonder if this is how Tasuku felt, too…)

-

Tsumugi: Thank you for your hard work.

Director: Good work. We’ll be counting on you tomorrow too.

Tsumugi: I will be in your care.

Ryota: Thank you for your hard work~ Tsumugi-san, see ya~!

Tsumugi: See you.

-

Tsumugi: (Filming ended early today. I still have some time until the time I asked the Director to come pick me up…)

Tsumugi: (That reminds me, there should be a gardening store nearby. Maybe I’ll go check it out.)

[Someone falling]

Woman: Urgh…

Tsumugi: !?

Tsumugi: Are you alright?

Woman: I-I’m sorry…

Tsumugi: Ah–

Woman: ——

-

[Car coming to a stop]

Izumi: (The place Tsumugi-san asked me to meet him at should be around here, but–)

Izumi: Ah, there he is. Tsumugi-san–

Tsumugi: Oh, good. Over here.

Woman: …

Izumi: Oh? Who is this?

Tsumugi: It seems like she suddenly started feeling nauseous, so I was keeping her company.

Izumi: Wha!? Do you want us to take you to the hospital?

Woman: Oh, no, no. I was just feeling a little bloated. I felt better when I sat down.

Woman: My husband will be coming to pick me up soon—

The woman’s husband: Heeey!

Woman: Ah, there he is. I’ll be fine now.

Woman: Thank you so much, Tsukioka-kun, really.

Tsumugi: It’s no problem. Take care of yourself.

Woman: I’m sorry for troubling you.

The woman’s husband: Thanks for all your help. We'll be going now.

-

Izumi: Was that woman a friend of yours?

Tsumugi: She’s someone I used to date, actually. It looks like she’ll be giving birth soon.

Izumi: !? W-Wasn’t that a little awkward?

Tsumugi: Huh?

Izumi: You even met her current partner…

Tsumugi: Ahh… I was surprised because it all happened in the blink of an eye, but she seemed happy, and neither of them seemed to mind too much.

Tsumugi: She always wanted to get married quickly, so I’m glad she found a good guy to settle down with.

Izumi: I see…

Izumi: (That’s pretty in line with Tsumugi-san’s character. They were talking to each other so casually back there.)

Tsumugi: I’m sorry for making you come pick me up.

Izumi: Not at all! I was just out on some business myself, so don’t worry about it. Besides, this place is a little inconvenient to get to without a car.

Tsumugi: It’s gotten a little late, would you like to get curry together on our way home? It’ll be my treat as thanks for picking me up.

Izumi: Are you sure!? Thank you very much!

-

Tasuku: “Stop! You’re wrong!”

Tasuku: … We got told off about this part pretty often, huh?

-

[Flashback starts]

Reni: This final performance gets a “passing grade”. Reflect on the meaning of these words well.

Reni: A safe result is not befitting of GOD-za. You must always aim for perfection. There won’t be a next time.

Tasuku: Yes, sir.

Haruto: Yes, sir!

[Flashback ends]

-

Tsumugi: I’m back.

Tasuku: Hey, welcome back. How did the filming go?

Tsumugi: It’s really different from being on stage. Honestly, I found a lot of things difficult.

Tsumugi: But it’s because of that that I found it interesting. Thinking of how to improve for next time is fun, too.

Tasuku: It’s just like you to be able to switch between theater and filming so flexibly.

Tsumugi: Oh, right, I met someone I used to know today.

Tasuku: Someone you used to know?

Tsumugi: The girl I used to date. She got married and has a baby on the way. She’ll be giving birth soon, apparently.

Tasuku: HUH!?

Tsumugi: Is that so shocking? I mean, I was surprised at first, too.

Tasuku: No, rather than shocked… I feel weird because you never talk to me about these things.

Tsumugi: Right, I didn’t have much experience in that field until university.

Tasuku: Right…

Tsumugi: More importantly, is that the script for your upcoming drama? It’s pretty messed up already.

Tasuku: No, this is… A script from my time at GOD-za that I dug up.

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[anonymouschishiyaimaginesandmore]

[Scrubs_MD]

Minors, do not read! Contains mentions of smutty behavior!

MASTERLIST (up-to-date)

This is Part 1 !!HERE!! is Part 2

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Alice in Borderland/Imawa no Kuni no Alice characters or original stories, only the plot of this fanfic. Alice in Borderland/Imawa no Kuni no Alice characters and original storyline belong to Haro Aso, who made the Manga the Series is based on.

Trigger Warning: Explicit Smut Summery: Chishiya x female OC that I gave a Name for this Story

Asana was a good kid when she grew up. She came from a good family with a good background and good parents that just happen to be, you guessed it, good.

And all that stuff stayed that way until Asa, how she preferred to get called, was old enough to start Uni and it just happened to be in Japan’s most populated City, but hey it wasn’t her fault, like her siblings tend to treat it.

It was just that the stuff she wanted to study could be nowhere better archived than there, tho Asa didn’t mind not having to share her room and privacy with the younger ones, so of course she moved. Sadly, the country bumpkin soon had to find out that living in the big City, especially the fancy part of Shibuya was one hell of an expensive place.

Everywhere she looked, prices were bambooing into the sky and Asa didn’t even put the cost of each university year into account. She was constantly running low. Her wallet was dry and empty and the times she did got her twitching fingers on some coin, groceries and other necessities pulled them out again almost instantly. Damn life but meh.

While she did find a cheap place to stay, sharing an apartment with 5 other roommates, money still was tight and the chances to get a job outside of school and work, since all the time she wasn’t spending inside of a lecture hall, was taken by patients in the hospital, running around and demanding her attention while constantly dying, nonexistent.

But Asa didn’t mind it. She loved medicine, it has always been her dream of becoming a doctor so a parttime job had to fill the same gaps of her free time hours and what would be better than Camming right?

One of her Roommates, a girl that already left since she made a good amount of money on the side and didn’t need to share her space anymore, brought up the Idea, splitting the tea and telling poor naïve Asa about all the adventures she had online by showing off her body and moving in sultry ways that were meant to attract horny guys with too much paper in their pockets. And she did.

Since the girl showed Asa the numbers on her account, that just seemed way too unbelievable to be true but didn’t look horrendous enough to forget and asking her if she wanted to join her in a session, things kind of got out of hand fast.

So before Asa could really say what happened, the roommate has left the apartment and Asa picked up where the girl left with her own show, dancing and jumping and flirting on demand.

The roommate has shared some knowledge and Asa was already kind of introduced after a few accompanied sessions, so things did start off smoothy and after a few of her own shows, the young girl has gotten completely used to share her privacy anew. This time with strangers and showing off a lot of skin.

Thirsty Lorelay just started her newest session, come and join her!

Chishiya read the popped-up message at the right side of his screen, while scrolling thru pictures with links to boring Cam shows he already tried but didn’t thrill him in any way.

None of them attracted his lingering desire to get entertained for the night. Not since he dived into the erotic part of the darknet, watching woman undress and moan on his command.

It did have a lot of interesting advantages to tell someone exactly how to behave in front of him, instead of watching already filmed movies where he had no say in how things could possibly turn out and more importantly turn him on. Chishiya has found himself drawn more and more to the forbidden entertainment of online girls.

He was a man after all. The want to get off in a thrilling way came from time to time and it was also a good action to blow off pent up steam.

His dads credit card was the best way to get it and soon Chishiya found himself among other horny people, cheering and promising good money to see more and more of a person, tho he was rather of the silent lingering in a corner type, that overwatched the situation and the people’s reaction to every bit of falling clothing and exposed skin.

The VPN he created at the very beginning of his dive into adventurous streams, made sure to hide his location and that was a precautionary measure he just didn’t want to miss.

In case some hacker would try to trace back his location to frame or blackmail him for payment, Chishiya was safe at least with the newest and best software he could get for his money. No way he would let that happen. Chishiya was too smart of a guy to risk such measures, so he always made sure to hide his IP Adress as good as possible with the newest program and all his might.

However, this action also gave him the wonderful opportunity to watch and explore Cam shows that have been restricted for his location. He knew that some of the girls he watched weren’t dumb enough to pose half naked and then share their identity online, so they could be blamed and found out as the hot but dirty girl the husband or boyfriend or whatever man watched the show, blamed them to be.

People had things to lose. Reputations, their name and their face among family and friends, so, on some occasions, Chishiya turned all other locations off just to see the cam shows that were normally hidden from him.

It gave him the extra kick to know that the girls he enjoyed had no idea he could be their Neighbor or collage or maybe just the guy standing next to them in the underground train.

The show of Thirsty Lorelay asked for 3 000 yen as an entrance fee, but the first 5 minutes were free of charge, so Chishiya decided to take a look what this sinful siren could offer him for his money. His day has been boring. His supervisor didn’t like how much more Chishiya knew about certain aspects the man had to learn more then 10 years ago, so he let him run lap tests instead of joining in on examinations.

What a looser, Chishiya thought. Jealous of a guy half his age. It wasn’t the blond mans fault he was smarter than this old saggy balls neighbor whose wife was probably fucking the pool boy while he had to teach med students how to not kill people the first seconds they entered the ER.

Chishiya taped on his tablets screen that he carried with him everywhere, so he could work and study from the small bistro he liked to enjoy his coffee, all to the library he spends most of his free time in.

The chat took a while too load. Apparently, his newest addition to the list of possible strangers from the street, moaning for him on demand, had a good sum of visitors and Chishiya immediately knew why.

The way the girl, surely not older than him, swayed her hips while laying down on the bed in front of the camera to greet everyone and thanking them for joining her, spoke of someone who was used to this kind of behavior online.

Surely not an amateur and Chishiya smiled to himself, when she read his username, commenting on the nice choice of avatar. It was his upper body, aside from his face. Nude and almost completely hairless with light hints of muscles and a chiseled V-line pointing towards his groin like an arrow.

Chishiya was just not the type to work out constantly, he had to time for it, nor the ambition and his body was showing that, but he was lean, and his skin had a healthy and nice tone with a slightly raised chest and a flat abdomen.

The happy trail showed the dark trimmed hair of his and led down to the black hem of his confinements. That was all he was sharing of himself and with small delight, the blond med student watched the girl bite her lower lip, chewing on it for seconds before releasing it and blowing him a kiss.

One, just for him.

She then went on telling everyone how her day went, unbuttoning her plain boring floral shirt that she probably used to wear all day.

Thirsty Lorelay: “I was shopping” she retold the happening “And there was this guy an isle behind me, watching very obviously how I bend over to get something from the lowest part of the shelf. I felt his eyes on me and I swear I could hear him lick his dry fucking lips.”

She giggled amused while one button followed the next one revealing more and more skin too slow for his liking, but okay, she just started, so the blond man forgave her for teasing him.

Thirsty Lorelay: “Then I thought maybe he was one of you guys and you know what? That totally got me creaming my panties.”

Me too, Chishiya thought, imagining the good-looking patient his collage had today could have been thirsty Lorelay. His flaccid dick twitch under the stiff cover of his pants and the blond man took in a deep breath.

Thirsty Lorelay: “Just thinking one of you could be watching me right then and there, doing my every day and thinking nothing bad could happen”

The last button popped, and the girl slid open the fabric, offering a good view of red lace lingerie that was in no way on the same level of practical clothing like the ugly shirt.

Thirsty Lorelay: “That turned me on so much, I would have loved to know what he was thinking”

“Sure, you did” Chishiya said to himself, scoffing a little too sarcastic. He knew all the girl told him right now, was probably a lie. Maybe she did go grocery shopping this day, but her kind doesn’t tend to view creeps in the wild the same way they did online. After all, why else would she hide her identity if it would be different. The black cotton mask around her eyes wasn’t there to cover possible wrinkles she sure didn’t possess.

No matter, her sultry spoken words indicated something else and the way she turned from a boring no one to a hidden gem right in front of him, was enough to pull him into the fantasy.

Thirsty Lorelay: “The guy sadly did nothing, thought a small bump here and a nice grind there would have been very welcomed.”

The girl winked suggestive and Chishiya slid deeper into his chair. He was at home. The tablet on his lap, hold up by angled legs, watching Fullscreen how an everyday girl told him about fantasies while undressing in the slowest way possible.

Thirsty Lorelay: “What would you guys do if you would met me outside and you knew who I am but I have no idea who you are?”

The shirt slipped over her shoulders while the girl arched her back, titling her head to the side and giving everyone a nice view of just how charming she was.

Thirsty Lorelay: “Would you come over and speak to me?”

Fabric lowered more and more, until her arms were trapped behind her back, hold in place by the ugly shirt she wore moments ago. The round lines of her breasts ended where the fabric begun and even tho it hit so much of precious skin, its tight hugging features also revealed more and more of her wonderful appetizing curves, turning her into an erotic wanking remedy he just couldn’t reach.

Thirsty Lorelay: “Would you tell me how beautiful I am?”

Her chest rose while her voice lowered to an electrifying tone. Dark eyes fluttered shut while her back kept arching towards the camera and she sighed in a hopeless frustrated manner that instantly shot a sign from his brain to his defined dick, still caged between layers of fabric.

Thanks to her behavior, goosebumps raised all over Chishiyas body and he became painfully aware how stiff his neck has gotten over the day, as he leaned forward to get a closer view of the stream unfolding in front of him.

Thirsty Lorelay: “How much you want to drag me out of here and find the next place to ravish me?”

Chishiya watched how her set up posture, sitting back on legs and kept up by knees, parted shameless thighs, promising guilty pleasure but not showing anything besides small pieces of skin he already discovered. He wanted more. Needed it.

To see demanded it now. Growing more and more impatient with every oh so small move the girl far away from him did right now, Chishiya panted now so close against his tablet, fog was building up on the plastic screen, making him realize how much off a fool he was making of himself and sitting back, slightly annoyed at his own want.

She was obviously not willing to let the man in him see what he wanted. Yet. But Chishiya knew that all streams eventually went the same way, and he could wait. Just for now. While a tiny bit of hope raised in him that maybe, just maybe he would have a wonderful evening today after that terrible work he had to endure.

Thirsty Lorelay: “I would have loved that”

With those words, the girl bit her finger and fell on her back, giggling like crazy and wiggling her spine, while her ass slightly raised from the sheets under her, swinging left and right in a playful matter. Then, said finger started its own adventure down her upper body, making every watching person oh so aware of how fast her breath was going.

It begun at her chin and Chishiya gulped, as she drew the outlines of her lips before the small digit withed lower towards her chest and between soft hills of untouched land, to her navel where she drew some rounds, before parting and stopping at the hem of her plaid flat skirt that hid all too well what so many man craved right now.

Thirsty Lorelay: “Where would you have taken me?” she asked further “Your home? To your bed? Or would the situation make you so impatient, that the next ally would have to do?”

The Chat went nuts. Chishiya watched how man after man wrote down sentences of locations, offering way too much of their own information, while explaining what they would do to her if they could get her into their hands.

[SelflessLover69]: I would take my time with you and get you home.

[BigBratThatLovesItHard]: You deserve some nice cock

[HornyDudeNextDoor]: Damn Lory you look so hot

[Masturbator666]: Tie you up and give it to you hard

[Arouse_Me_Mommy]: I bet that sweet mouth knows how to suck good dick

[NaughtyBoy_123]: Shit I could come right over that belly

[AnnonymousGuest]: Be a good girl and you get what you want Lory

[FriskyMe78]: What a sweetheart you are

[RideMyFace]: Baby girl knows what she wants

Chishiya saw plenty of these comments appear. They all tried to outdo eachother and get the girls attention, while she did nothing but tracing her exposed upper body with lost fingers.

Thirsty Lorelay: “Tze tze tze you guys are so dirty” the performer said, shaking her index finger in front of the camera “So impatient” her tongue was pressed against the front of her lips while she moved her head from left to right, smiling all devilish “Your lewd comments alone could make me cum” hips raised to meet the oncoming touch.

Lorelay rose back to sit on her legs. Knees dig deep into the white sheets of her blanket while she sighed in played frustration again, before suddenly her face shifted into a devilish grin with mischievously glinting eyes.

Thirsty Lorelay: “But not today bad boys” she said, reaching for something behind the camera, retrieving it with a purple something in hand and giving the new toy a long, wet and tonguely lick “Today…I want you guys to ravish me with your looks. You think you can do that?” kissing the tip and winking at the lens and everyone behind it.

Again, the Chat went berserk, answering with so many yes’s and pleads, the smaller comments on her appearances got drowned in seconds.

Chishiya watched with raising impressment how the girl that barely undressed in any way already had her crowd cheering in madness, dropping money with wishes and asks for a private chat. But Lorelay ignored them mostly, turning on the vibrating function of her new purple toy and letting it explore her body.

Thirsty Lorelay: “I think” she said reaching her navel anew, the upper part plunging into the way too tiny hole, what made her abdomen flex and retract and forced small gasps out of her sinful throat “Today, there won’t be any penetration.”

[Masturbator666]: Oh no

[AnnonymousGuest]: Why?

Thirsty Lorelay: “I have been such a bad girl, you guys should have seen me at work”

[XXX_SmexyMe_XXX]: Work sucks

[NaughtyBoy_123]: What happened?

[BabyMaker53]: I would have fucked you on my desk if we met at work

[MilfPounder_XX]: You would look so pretty on my cock

[RideMyFace]: Baby girl can ride me all day

Thirsty Lorelay: “My supervisor told me to do something, and I was soouuu bratty” the vibrator moved lower “I didn’t move a finger” right over her hidden cunt “Not a single one” pressing hard against the flesh and eliciting a long desperate mewl “I have such terrible manners” she gasped and Chishiya parted his legs go give his growing bulge more space.

[BigBratThatLovesItHard]: Such a selfish baby

[Ass_on_Me]: So spoiled

Thirsty Lorelay: “He should have spanked me, maybe then I would have listened”

The vibrator went along her thighs and Chishiya saw the goosy flesh pimpling all over her otherwise so smooth skin. He was already addicted to count each one of them, probably hard before he reached even half.

[BabyMaker53]: I forgive you

[HornyDudeNextDoor]: I would ruin you instead

The girl giggled again, letting out a long mhmm as the toy disappeared under her skirt and Chishiya went back to huff and puff against the screen, fogging it all over again.

Thirsty Lorelay: “But we can still have so much fun”

[ProneBoner]: Take off the skirt!!

[RickSpanks]: Show me some skin

[BabyMaker]: Yeah take off the skirt

[Sir_ Cum_a_lot]: We wanna see some good pussy

[BiggusDickus]: Let the London bridge come down!

Thirsty Lorelay: “You guys want me to take off my skirt?”

The chat started cheering, chanting words repeatedly that told her to yes, take off the skirt. Pleads over pleads all begging for the same thing while all she did was snicker all giddily.

Chishiya, under the username Scrubs_MD couldn't help but chuckle at the desperate commands some man did. His eyes followed the toy as she set it aside carefully, then back to her fingers grabbing the zipper on her right hip, pulling it down agonizingly slowly.

Thirsty Lorelay: “You want me naked so fast?”

Again, many yes toppled the chat.

Thirsty Lorelay: “Greedy boys. So impatient”

But Lorelay did what the chat asked her to do and pulled the zipper down, revealing more lingerie in red scandalous lace. Until now, only her thin waist promised what could await a man if he got lucky enough to do meet her in real life, but now it peaked and giving the cheering mass hope for a glance all over. The skirt fell and Chishiya bit his lip, chewing on the sensitive skin as his cock jumped in joy.

What a tease this girl was. Other performer would have already taken off all their clothes, leaving maybe a bra on or just the panties, but Lorelay was still wearing too much for the blond mans liking. He couldn’t wait to see more and so Chishiya tapped the screen, typing a number that he knew only the girl could see.

And she saw it. The message of Scrubs_MD popped up on Asa’s screen, offering her 7 000 yen if she took of her underwear. It made her smile to herself, knowing how much this guy was thriving to see her most inner parts. To have her all on display and enjoy her looks, while telling her how beautiful she was. Back in her hometown, no one ever told her that.

She was nothing more than a Daisy among others. She was called cute and sweet and on some occasions lovely, but never has any man craved to see more of her, obsessed at the thought what she could hide under baggy hoodies and washed out jeans. This Chat was different. All those men wanted her. Begged for her attention and paid money for the tiniest bit sinful skin that only she could offer.

The blissful moments she gave herself were all situations that those man hoped to see more and more of and here she was, depriving Scrubs_MD of a way too soon end, knowing damn well that it would only make him want her more if she kept playing with him.

Thirsty Lorelay: “Nice try, scrubs, but you gotta have to wait like everyone else”

The skirt fell nonetheless and exposed more delicate slick skin, pristine and unspoiled.

No I don’t, Chishiya thought, typing another number and sending away the offer, sure this time he would get what he paid for.

Asa read the new number looking directly into the camera and cocking her head while flashing a seductive discreed smile only for him.

Thirsty Lorelay: “Nah ah, what a stubborn boy you are”

The blond doctor was sure he had her where she wanted. After all, the numbers had doubled and if he was honest, it was the highest he ever paid to have a girl undress in an open chat, but to his surprise, the girl refused again, what weirdy made him proudly puffing his chest up.

Now that he didn’t get what he wanted, Chishiya couldn’t wait to see what was worth more than 14 000 yen. His eyes scanned the girls body up and down. There was a scar on her waist right above her appendix that obviously has been taken out years ago when she was younger and one on her left side, right where her strongest muscle was beating steady, so Chishiya indicated that she also had a heart surgery long ago, since the scar tissue had paled to a nice ivory tint.

On her left thigh there was a collection of small reddish dots. 5 Moles so close to eachother forming the oddly close form of the constellation Cassiopeia. Chishiya narrowed his eyes, squinting while almost faceplanting on his tablet. It looked exactly like the constellation.

It can’t be, Chishiya thought, leaning back into his chair. No way this was a natural birthmark. The blond man was sure it had to be tattooed on her skin, but the fact that at least 3 of them looked a little frayed, told him differently.

He observed now with higher interest how the female camgirl grabbed her toy again and fell to her side, laying completely down and giving everyone a good look of how Leonardo Di ’Caprio would have drawn this not so french girl.

The Vibration made a comeback and disappeared immediately between her legs, hidden by her thighs side that had the 5 small dots playing with Chishiyas mind. Her back arched upwards as the tip likely traced the clothed part of her folds, maybe even dipping in? Who knows.

The crowd could only speculate on it and so could Chishiya. Looking for signs of her body that could indicate that the pleasure she displayed to have, was real or faked. His eyes took more and more of her every move in, making his own heart race with anticipation.

Then it happened. Her free hand reached for her chest, opening the front clip with skilled fingers and Chishiya catched himself holding his breath, while wait for the cups to pile away, but the fabric stayed where it was, not revealing anything and Chishiya groaned annoyed at cursing the stupid designers of this erotic piece of clothing that again deprived him of the least bit of fun he could have set his eyes on.

[piracytheorist]

Hellooo

Okay so a thought came in my mind....the first thing twilight does is get anya(a kid from the orphanage) for operation strix, right?? But what if instead he entered a marriage of convenience with a woman who has a kid who wants to go to Eden?? Twilight would play the part of the second husband lmao

Do you think that could have happened?? How would that turn out?

Hi! Long post coming!

That's an interesting concept, and there would be ways to work around making it happen. But I think it would make for a completely different dynamic and story overall.

In this case, the child's role in the story would be greatly undervalued; the main reason Anya has a main role and influence in the story is her telepathy, which allows her a deeper knowledge and understanding (a bit) of the things happening around her, and she acts on the stuff she learns, making her a more active participant than the average child character in a story.

Also, Anya's main reason to stay with Twilight even after she found out how dangerous it can be (after she got kidnapped by Edgar's goons), and how emotionally detached he is from her, is because she heard his thoughts about how he wants to make a peaceful world where children don't cry. She admires him and is inspired by him because of that.

A child that doesn't know Twilight is a spy or his reasons to be one would be more of a plot device than a character with agency and control. Anya chooses to be a part of Operation Strix (albeit probably not understanding the full weight of that responsibility), a non-telepathic child would actually be what Twilight wanted to make out of Anya; a tool to be used for his mission. That would make for a darker story, and fewer people in the audience would be willing to forgive Twilight's coldness because here a child is 100% used. Anya having agency makes it more palatable and easier to see a potential for relationship development.

As for the mother. In the current story, I feel that Yor is way more tolerant of Loid's strict methods because she thinks that, as Anya's father, he knows best. She does speak up when she thinks he's being too strict, but overall she accepts it because she feels it's not her place to speak, even though Loid has made it clear that she has an equal role in raising Anya as he does. This also raises an interesting question about identity reveals; how will Yor react when she realizes Anya only knew Loid for a couple of days before meeting Yor, and thus Loid had no actual paternal advantage over Yor when it came to how to treat Anya? I think she'll be furious and super protective of Anya.

In a story where Twilight married a woman with a child she raised, I can see two options: one where she would not tolerate him being stricter than her, and one where she would marry him because he could be stricter than her.

In the first scenario, she'd be the one to say "I know best" and Twilight wouldn't have a lot of control over how well the kid does at school. He wouldn't be allowed to pressure the kid to study harder, and it's a question how willing and prepared the kid would be to even study in the first place. Twilight would need to resort to altering the kid's grades at school. Since the kid has no telepathy, they wouldn't know about Twilight's motivations, they wouldn't be touched by that, and combined with Twilight's emotional distance, I don't think they'd ever build a connection that would resonate with the audience the way Twilight and Anya's relationship has. If the kid ever got a Stella, Twilight would simply see it as a mission progress and not a moment for him to be proud of them.

The kid might grow to see him as a father and want to make him proud, but they'd never know any real parts of Twilight. Anya came face to face with danger because she messed with Twilight's equipment, which she knew how to access because of her telepathy - and her being in danger is what kickstarted Twilight's feelings of protectiveness and reminder of his "a world where children don't cry" motivation. The kid in this scenario wouldn't be as likely to get in danger, and if they did, it wouldn't be directly because of Twilight being a spy, so he wouldn't reach the point of thinking "A kid was put in danger because of my job, when the very reason I have this job is to protect kids." So overall, it would be a story with much fewer opportunities for emotional moments, and frankly, a little plain and boring. Without Twilight's core realization, there wouldn't be an opportunity for interesting conflicts to arise and to force either character to develop.

And as for his relationship with the mother, he might unintentionally start connecting with her due to her want to give her child what she considers the best there is to give, but without the equal standing that Loid and Yor have when it comes to raising Anya, I just don't see this Twilight ever opening up to his fake wife. There would always be a bubble of "mother and child" that Twilight would feel a stranger to - and would keep reminding himself it should stay this way. It would be a more distanced case, compared to the actual story where there's a fake "father and child" bubble that Loid expands to include Yor in, because Yor is willing to be part of it.

In the second scenario, the mother would be exactly what Eden secretly wants; a snotty elitist who sees her child as an extension of her ambitions rather than a person of their own. And she would go as far as to have a marriage of convenience with a guy she barely knows to further that goal. In that case, it would be to her benefit to have the fake husband be even stricter than her, so Twilight would go all out like he's training a rookie spy.

Needless to say this would be the darkest scenario. The child would be very emotionally repressed, and for them Twilight wouldn't even be a father figure, he would be a commander standing above their head and making sure they study all of the time. Reminder here that Twilight is so distanced from human emotions and connections that at least at first, he didn't realize children have a different psychology and aren't just small people with the intellectual capacity and emotional stability of an adult. He needed to read about child-rearing to understand Anya's behaviour; he needed Yor's intervention to remember that Anya is young and may not have the ability or willingness to study as much as he does. So Twilight in such a scenario would have no single opening to grow emotions because he would be too busy making sure the child studies and excels and gains Stellas. Probably what Nightfall imagined herself doing with Anya, though I think he's above disciplining a child via physical violence. Not that that saves him; I'm sure he'd be super willing to discipline the child with harsh words, threats to take away things they like (which he did with Anya in episode 7, even though he relented later), and with emotional or psychological punishments. And the child would just accept that, because they'd already grown up with a very strict mother, and the mother would approve of Twilight's methods, and had learned that they just have to accept whatever kind of abuse life threw at them. The child may have learned to swallow their tears and never cry in front of their parents, which wouldn't force Twilight to have his realization and thus he'd keep pushing the child without understanding just how against his own morals he's going.

His relationship with the mother would be very distanced, and it would never touch the real person hiding behind the Twilight persona. As we see in the actual story, Twilight appreciates Yor's strength because it makes Anya feel safe and protected and happy, and it reminds him of how his own mother made him feel that, and how he treasures those memories even after all those years of loss and pain. The mother here does the complete opposite; she'd be willing to practically crush her own child's psyche all to satisfy her egotistical need to be seen as an elite. She'd have the emotional coldness and distance that Twilight the actual spy has, and it would only cause him to fall deeper into that pit and have even fewer chances of ever connecting with his own emotions again. And of course, the audience would be fully unwilling to forgive him and to root for him to become better and grow a relationship with the child.

So TL/DR; it would either be a boring, soulless story, or a dark story following a child being abused and Twilight completely losing himself. Not a story that shouldn't exist, but certainly not a feel-good one.

[selamat-linting]

My year of rest and relaxation is pretty good though. i read it a couple of years ago and a lot of it stuck with me. the narrator's mom described as a fish, not only its her internalized sexism at play its a parallel to her who is currently doing the same thing. sleeping to pass the year, living moment to moment, try not to remember or be cognizant of anything. she is such a terrible, privileged person and she's so deeply alienated from everything. its compelling. i feel sad for her. i do wonder that since the book is set pre-9/11 its a commentary from otessa on how the nostalgic past has always been a rotting facade all along, that even the privileged class of society is simply trucking along trying to find joy from Product! Advertisement! Mind numbing ways to spend time because you made yourself unable to care for anything outside of your self-centered bubble!

Another bit that stuck with me was the final chapter of the narrator seeing her friend jump from the towers. Here she is, alive, wide awake, jumping to the unknown. That really sums up the point of the book. Sleeping is dying, the narrator has a beating heart but she was (or is still) dead because she is avoiding to acknowledge the change of her life from adulthood and loss of her parents. Living is facing the unknown, and all this time she is dead because she's stuck in the shitty art scene filled with purposeless trust fund babies, sleeping and drugging her way through life. Her friend is alive, and the narrator will always see her as a part of the living, because her last act is bravely risking it all in hopes she won't burn to death.

A blind spot the narrator has though, was in matters of race. She was especially dismissive to the brown men who worked at the shop near her apartment. The narrator did get badly treated by men in a lot of occasions, but I wonder if this (edit: by this i mean the men in the shops acting too friendly to her, not the guys who used her for affairs and such) is a case of unreliable narration. There is also this part where she, a white woman, was locked in a room for the rest of the year, taken care of by some guy who uses her as a muse. The paintings he made showed her wearing a kimono, in a japanese inspired art style, posing in ways she can't remember doing. I feel like that should be discussed more. I feel like I'm stumbling upon something I should understand but couldn't when I read that. What do you mean? Am I reading too much into the blindspot of an author or is this an intentional writing choice?

All in all, this is a sad girl book where nothing happens, the narrator is super navel-gazey and everything is excessively a spesific type of usamerican. But I like the character study. It's a fascinating piece of writing

[victorzhuzhakin]

If there are more people here who are interested in robot/human couples, then I want to show you my characters!

                                           HENRY AND MAGNUS!!!

Henry is a robot butler who lives with a woman he helps (she's a lesbian btw) He has the personality and demeanor of a stereotypical old grumpy British man. Many people consider him to be a defective robot because he doesn't follow commands and has a personality. He is also annoying and chatty.

Magnus Farrimond is an old scientist who has devoted his life to creating robots and studying their life. To be honest, he's kind of obsessed with old robots that don't look humans...

They met by chance thanks to Janko (the woman Henry lives with). Henry was a long-time fan of Magnus (Henry has been around for about 200 years) and his scientific work, so when he first saw him live he was delighted. 

Janko thought that Henry would bother Magnus with her presence, but Magnus wanted to continue communicating with Henry after their first meeting.

After a while, they realized that they were in love with each other. But Henry found it hard to accept, because he doesn't quite understand what it means. And also because he denied that he was gay, although in his entire "life" he had never been attracted to either women or men (robots or people).

In sum, hey found each other. Magnus was the first person in 200 years who didn't treat Henry with disdain and accept his queerness. Henry is glad that Magnus treats him equally and sees him as something of a human being.

God they really are husbands

Bro horny...

Magnus also has a son, Archibald, who is also a robot, but looks like a human. He and Henry are on neutral terms because they just don't know how to treat each other.  (Archibald was created 30 years ago and mentally he is also an adult, never mind he looks like a teenager lol)

Thank you for your attention to my characters, tell me what you think of them (please)

[jayalma]

Hi! I was wondering if I could get a matchup with a male character from hsr, please?

My name’s Rachel, I’m 19, and my pronouns are she/her. My zodiac sign is Taurus and I’m an INFP. 

For my personality, I’m really bad at initially talking to people and definitely more introverted. I opt to spend my time alone rather than with people. I do think I’m creative and more enjoyable to be around after knowing me for a while. I zone out a lot and don’t pick up on conversations sometimes. I’m also impatient and very stubborn. 

I’ve played piano for 12 years, so that’s a big passion of mine. I love getting the opportunity to play and I definitely thinks it helps me better express myself. I also know how to figure skate. I’ve been skating since I was a child, and it’s another big passion of mine. I’d like to think I’m good enough to be in the olympics but definitely not. :) Other just general things I like doing are baking, and sewing. I’ve found that I try out new hobbies a lot but get tired or forget about them pretty quickly, so the ones that stick are pretty important! I wouldn’t say there’s much that I dislike, but I absolutely hate any bug ever. I’m also not a big fan of fish or seafood at all. 

I honestly feel like my appearance is pretty boring. I have dark brown hair a little longer than my shoulders. It curls up into waves at some parts but is straight in others. I honestly hate how it looks but don’t really have the materials to do anything about it. I have dark brown eyes, and fairly long eyelashes. My skin is pale, I’ve tried to tan before but it doesn’t really work. I’m 5’7 and pretty slim. I have been told by strangers that I could be a model though, so that definitely helps with my confidence. I feel like if I was a color, I would be a muted lavender color. My favorite is pink though. Total contrast to my style/aesthetic, which is very streetwear and kinda grungy. I definitely admire more coquette styles, I just don’t think they suit me well.

Hope that was all good, thank you so much!!

OMG MY FIRST REQUEST I’M SO HAPPY HIIII!!!

The fact that surprised me is that we are pretty much alike in terms of appearance and personality 😯 And I’m reeeeeeeeeeeally into coquette style!

When I finished reading your ask, instantly popped into my mind two mens, and then I decided to study each of them better to give you a more precise result!

Now without further waiting, let’s go to the matchup, I hope you like it! 😁

I MATCH YOU WITH…

🥀ᴀʀɢᴇɴᴛɪ.ᐟ

I hope you like receiving compliments…. Because this man…

Your appearance is pretty boring? NO. No no no no no, not a chance, he will do anything possible for you to change your mind!

He finds you the most beautiful woman in the world and treats you like a princess;

And he will do his best to scare any bugs away from you;

Often gifts you with roses, chocolates that he made ( YES I THINK HE BAKES WELL AND NOTHING CAN CHANGE MY MIND!!)

I believe his love language is words of affirmation and giving gifts!

I see him as a really calm and patient person, so there will be an equilibrium

And I believe, depending on the situation, he will see your stubbornness as determination and he will admire it a lot!!!

WAIT WAIT WAIT!! You said you have piano skills right? I have some headcanons on him about musical instruments, and I can imagine you having a duet together🥹;

He is a really respectful person, so he will understand and respect the times that you like to be alone;

About the skating, he supports you a lot and often says that you should try participating in competitions (and if you do, he will be your number one fan and always be cheering for you);

He thinks that you’re really stylish, and often makes you company when go for shopping;

[yanderes-galore]

May I request a romantic or romantic/platonic yandere concept or alphabet for Julie Langford from Bioshock? - 🍂 For a concept, I was thinking it could be with a darling who's some combination of sheltered/innocent/spoiled and in for a VERY rude awakening when Rapture starts falling apart - but a general concept with a less specific darling is competely okay ^^ I remember you saying that alphabets are actually easier to write most of the time, so I would be equally happy with one of those instead!

Uhh... hm, sure. I can't say there will be much detail as her character isn't really threatening at all but I can try.

Yandere Alphabet - Julie Langford

Pairing: Platonic/Romantic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Kidnapping/Isolation, Drugging/Poison, Gassing, Manipulation, Unhealthy power dynamic, Dubious/Forced companionship, Mostly tame.

Affection: How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?

Julie is an older woman who has dedicated her life to botanical studies. She spends most of her time in Arcadia studying. As a result she doesn't have many close to her.

However, maybe you could be her assistant in her research. That would be a way for you two to share a connection. Plus it incorporates her line of work.

Julie would be one to bond through her love of botany. Her obsession is rather tame and soft for the most part and she isn't that intense. Yet she's still very capable.

Blood: How messy are they willing to get when it comes to their darling?

Not very messy. She feels killing to keep you beside her makes her like those problematic Splicers.

Maybe if she'd have to she could make a poison to remove unwelcome guests around you, but she prefers to keep things non-lethal.

Cruelty: How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?

If she did abduct you she'd treat you with care. She doesn't appear to be a violent person and is probably one of the most sane ones in Rapture.

If she "abducted" you in Arcadia she would claim it's because of the Splicers. She would also not mock you as her assistant.

Darling: Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?

She tries not to yet she is someone you work under. If she asked you to do something you'd probably do it. If not... she'll try to convince you it's for a specific reason.

She uses subtle manipulation.

Exposed: How much of their heart do they bare to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

She cares for you quite a bit be it platonic or romantic. She's a bit vulnerable about you yet not much.

Fight: How would they feel if their darling fought back?

She'd think it's irritating, upsetting, and pointless. She isn't hurting you in her mind. If anything she's caring for you.

Would you rather suffer at the hands of Rapture's Splicers?

Game: Is this a game to them? How much would they enjoy watching their darling try to escape?

Not a game and she certainly does not like it when you try to escape.

Hell: What would be their darling’s worst experience with them?

Julie doesn't do much to make her a yandere other than some manipulation and distaste for other people.

However, the worst thing she'd do is drug you in some way to lock you in Arcadia. She has an extensive knowledge of plants so she most likely knows what does what.

Maybe she drugs your food or gasses you with some sort of plant based knock out drug. By the time you wake up she's locked you in her lab. That would be the worst thing she'd do to you.

She betrays your trust and isolates you... yet tries not to hurt anyone.

Ideals: What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?

It depends on how she feels for you.

Platonic: She plans to keep you her most treasured assistant. She'll keep you in Arcadia as long as she's there and teach you all she knows. You'll become her protégé.

Romantic: Very similar to the platonic version except this time she sees you as a potential lover. She wants to bond with you through botany, maybe even planning dates around it. She'll keep you in Arcadia just like the other version, except this time as her future spouse.

Jealousy: Do they get jealous? Do they lash out or find a way to cope?

Not really. She's a bit too mature for vocal jealousy yet she does appear annoyed when others speak to you. She blames it on them ruining potential research time.

She copes but will appear annoyed.

Kisses: How do they act around or with their darling?

I imagine Julie would be very caring towards her assistant while being colder to everyone else. She adores you and is very attentive to what you do in Arcadia. Everything from passing around notes and research or just speaking with her is enough to make her happy

She isn't very physically affectionate yet if you needed comfort or were affectionate yourself, she'd indulge because you like it. She's caring and it's hard to tell there's anything wrong.

Let alone that she's a yandere.

Love letters: How would they go about courting or approaching their darling?

It would be slow and not very planned until maybe the very end.

You two meet in Arcadia due to a shared interest and work with one another. Then things would develop from there. She isn't a big one for stalking, just keeping you with her. That's how you'd meet... later on she would most likely get a little bit worse.

Mask: Are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?

She's softer with you because she genuinely cares about you.

Naughty: How would they punish their darling?

She doesn't really have to/need to. But if a time comes where she does have to make you comply... she may try to make a plant solution that would make you calmer.

Oppression: How many rights would they take away from their darling?

Not any if she doesn't need to.

Patience: How patient are they with their darling?

Very patient.

Quit: If their darling dies, leaves, or successfully escapes, would they ever be able to move on?

Probably would with time but she'll try to prevent it in any way she can.

Regret: Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let their darling go?

A little and she may let you go, unless it's dangerous.

Stigma: What brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc)?

It's unknown for her, but it may be because you're one of the closest people she knows.

Tears: How do they feel about seeing their darling scream, cry, and/or isolate themselves?

She'd comfort you the best she can and offer any remedy she thinks will help.

Unique: Would they do anything different from the classic yandere?

You can barely tell she's yandere as she isn't really violent.

Vice: What weakness can their darling exploit in order to escape?

It's not hard, if you say you'll accompany you somewhere she may let you. She isn't very strict.

Wit’s end: Would they ever hurt their darling?

No.

Xoanon: How much would they revere or worship their darling? To what length would they go to win their darling over?

She cares for you but isn't a worship yandere.

Yearn: How long do they pine after their darling before they snap?

A long time, maybe until Rapture falls.

Zenith: Would they ever break their darling?

No.

[amemenojaku]

Akyuu for the ask game!!

General opinion/How much I care about them: She's a girl she's a boy she's neither she's 1400 years old she won't live past 30 she can remember anything she sees she can't remember her past lovers she's the most influencial person in the human village she writes silly Agatha Christie fanfics!!! I LOVE her!! Easily a top 5 for me. Everything that surrounds her is fascinating, from the lore to her duty to the window on the world of touhou that she opened for the fans. I like that she's a tragic character yet she has such a strong personality, both that of a noble and of a woman who just wants to live her life and have a little fun As A Treat.

A ship I love: Akyuu/Kosuzu is so so so important to me as a tragic best friends enjoyer. I can do literally anything I want with this ship, tragedy, fluff, comedy, historical study pieces, bad ends - it always works. Their interactions are one of the reasons why I loved Forbidden Scrollery so much, the little moments when they just chat together around a cup of tea, when they do research on youkai, the ceremony under the sakura to extend Akyuu's lifespan, the Agatha ChrisQ chapters, the excellent "youkai are the enemies of humans" moments…

why does the panel on the right look like it's from a shoujo manga OUGHHH!! anyway um. I'm also really fond of Reimu/Akyuu (the longing and the parallels toi même tu sais) and Marisa/Akyuu (they'd be so funny together). As a whole I think every variation of Reimu/Marisa/Akyuu/Kosuzu works really well either as platonic or romantic.

A non-romantic relationship that I love: Probably with Yukari. There's definitely something fun to do with the guardian of Gensokyo and the reincarnations of its beloved chronicler. I like to imagine Yukari's existence has become almost reassuring to the children of Miare despite the fact that she's still a dangerous youkai. She'll always be there after all! In my mind it's also like the relatonship between a writer and an artist.

The NOTP: Don't have any!

My biggest headcanon about them: I've got a lot of headcanons for Akyuu which I'd like to do something with in the future, one of them is that she's really into flower language and personally chooses the flowers in the Hieda house. Each of Are's reincarnations also have a flower linked to them :) I love flowers myself so I'm projecting a little haha

An idea for a fanwork I would like to make/see about them: I have this idea for a mystery story on the Hieda family with lots of scheming and backstabbing but I am not very good at writing so it's only a silly dream for now. If someone on ao3 goes insane over Akyuu and a million different Hieda ocs one day that'll probably be me just saying

Something that makes me think of them: April Come She Will <3

[valentinsylve]

For @countdowntotwinpeaks fan exchange, here is my gift fic for @littlestsnicket --

It turned out to be the fluffiest thing I've ever written, which is terrible, since you didn't want fluff, but this is what came out. I hope it's good anyway!

(Characters: Bobby/Shelly; Leo/Shelly; Norma.

CW for domestic violence allusion because Leo.)

Jack Rabbit's Palace

Leo took Shelly to a midnight movie back in high school when such pastimes were daring and Leo was still just a bad, older boy, older and badder than that cheating Bobby Briggs. She found the picture horrifically violent, but gripping. The tag line was, “Who will survive, and what will be left of them?” 

Shelly could never have anticipated how later on, daily life in Twin Peaks would seem branded with those words. 

Leo had been quite persuasive in his courtship, but the line which caught her was deceptively simple. 

“You’re a grown woman, you’ve got a full-time job at the Double R, what are you doing going to geography class with a bunch of kids?” 

He didn’t seem wrong about that. Three weeks later, they were married. 

Home life was tolerable. Norma was basically her mom already, so Shelly wasn’t exactly leaving anyone behind. Leo made plenty of money driving the truck and selling drugs. Shelly liked a bit of nose candy herself, no reason to judge him for being the candyman. If only he didn’t lose his temper so often. The coke helped her feel better, at least. Gave her plenty of energy to keep the house up to Leo’s standards. 

The nights when Leo brought his coke-dealing buddies home were unpleasant, especially because she wasn’t allowed to get high when they were over. Shelly didn’t like playing waitress to handsy old creeps like Jacques Renault; but Leo told her to accept his little gifts and smile. A wife should be a proper hostess with her husband’s business associates. 

He finally laid down the law when the crystal bottle of scent from Horne’s Department Store came with a suggestion that Shelly quit the diner to take a job at the perfume counter, “with room for advancement, if you don’t mind working late.” Laying down the law took the form of some looming and growling at Jacques, which would have been fine if Leo hadn’t slapped the hell out of Shelly afterward when she had an armload of beer bottles. For “encouraging him.” Shelly hadn’t even known yet about the perfume counter, and where the girls who worked there wound up. Of course, she was stuck cleaning up broken glass and cigarette butts soaked in beer with a wrenched shoulder, which wasn’t a glamorous life either. Such a fucking mundane sort of horror.

After Leo hit her, he always seemed to end up crying in her lap. She’d pet his hair, wipe his snotty nose, and comfort him like a kid who’d fallen down on the playground. 

That particular night he sniffled, 

“I’m just trying to protect you, babe. Don’t you fucking dare take that job at Horne’s. I don’t want Jacques Renault talking to you again.” 

Since Leo didn’t bring Jacques over anymore, he was spending more late nights out. Shelly didn’t care where he might have been going. He tended to come home red-eyed and staggering, but less volatile, like the coals in his furnace had been banked for the night. This was all right, since at Norma’s coaxing she had begun studying to get her G.E.D..

One or the other of Leo’s high school errand boys would drop by on occasion, usually when Leo wasn’t at home. Shelly was inevitably bored, but that didn’t make her want their company. However, one Saturday, she got a surprise: the errand boy was Bobby Briggs. Shelly treated him with cool scorn the first time he came by, but he was persistent, and he was being nice to her. It didn’t hurt that he was handsome as ever, tall, with the most delicious wavy brown hair. 

It started to be fun seeing Bobby again. She’d share all the gossip from the diner, and he’d do little stunts to impress her: kid stuff like climbing the tall vine maple in the yard and gently pelting her with pocketfuls of the starlight mints he sucked on to counter the taste of cigarettes. He usually had a joint with him, too, so they’d pass it back and forth on the back porch and get giggly on the piney smoke. 

Bobby was officially dating Laura Palmer. Laura Palmer was basically Miss Perfect, too, aside from the whole helping Bobby cheat thing, so Shelly wasn’t sure why he was so eager to flirt with a dropout waitress. But her marriage was sorely lacking in romance, and she was young, and Bobby was very, very cute. Leo would’ve killed them both if he found out, even though nothing was happening. Yet.

It was only a matter of time. One afternoon, Bobby and Shelly were pleasantly stoned and enjoying the gloom of a late, mild winter day, sheltered from the misty drizzle by the back porch roof. 

“I love to listen to the whispering of the trees,” murmured Shelly. “Don’t they sound like they’re whispering?” Feeling very daring, she leaned her head a hair’s breadth from Bobby’s shoulder on the pretext of gazing dreamily at the branches which still had most of their brown leaves that warm, warm February. 

“What are they whispering?” asked Bobby, shifting casually so that his shoulder cradled her neck. 

Shelly slowly smiled, tilted her head to look up at him, and said, “They’re sending us a secret message. Can you hear what it is?”

“Tell me what they’re saying,” Bobby urged, teasing. 

Shelly nestled her head firmly on Bobby’s shoulder and said, “I can’t tell you, it’s a secret. Can you guess?”

Bobby wrapped his arms around her bit by bit, as if he were blanketing her in moss. 

“I can hear them now. I know what they’re telling us.” 

Shelly held still and took a deep breath. Her eyes grew very wide. 

“Yeah?”

“Yeah,” he said, with a tender, husky voice, and drew her up to face him. 

She felt weightless. Her heart seemed to have floated up into the trees. When they kissed, it was like the moment in a movie when a plane lands and the passengers all applaud. Then they both burst out laughing, and tugged at each other’s hair, growling like tussling puppies. 

He took her hands in his, jumped up from the porch, and twirled her around in the drizzle while she let out shrieks of delight. 

Bobby’s blue eyes had taken on a quality which Shelly could only describe as mesmerizing, and when he set her on her feet he looked at her like she was a precious jewel he’d found at the top of a mountain. 

“I want to take you to my favorite place. It’s... Maybe you’ll think it’s stupid, but I don’t know, the way you get so poetic about the trees. And you’re my best friend, and the prettiest girl, and I want to share it with you, even if you’re married and I can never kiss you again.” 

Shelly had never experienced a moment so playful and solemn at the same time. Every word they spoke to each other felt like a promise. 

The drive held a sacred hush, just the rumble of the engine. Bobby held Shelly’s hand whenever he wasn’t shifting gears. 

Bobby parked inside the entrance to Ghostwood National Forest, held the door for Shelly, and took her hand again. 

“I feel like you should cover your eyes on the way, you know, to make it more mysterious, but I don’t want you to trip and fall.” 

“It’s OK,” said Shelly, with a shy smile. “I’ll just pretend I’m not staring at you the whole way.” 

Bobby’s face lit up with one of his wild grins, and he said, “OK, then! Let’s go.” 

He led her along paths she wasn’t sure how he could find, and they ended up at a bit of a clearing. There was a gigantic stump of a tree that had been splintered long ago, and fallen parts of the trunk settled all around. 

“Here we are. Tell me what you think.” 

Shelly took in the secluded scenery. It felt majestic and eerie. 

“It looks like a throne. A big, rugged throne.”

Bobby exclaimed, “Yes! I knew you would see it.”

Bobby led her to the giant stump and hopped up on the fallen log leaning against it.  

“This is Jack Rabbit’s Palace. I used to come here with my dad when I was a kid. We’d play imagination games. They were some of the best times I ever had.” 

Shelly beamed up at Bobby. There was something melancholy in his voice when he talked about his dad, but it was just a cloud passing over the sun, just like Twin Peaks weather. The afternoon was dismal, but Bobby felt like sunshine, with just that hint of shadow. Shelly wanted to sweep all the clouds out of the sky for him. 

What sorts of imagination games Shelly and Bobby thought up at Jack Rabbit’s Palace remain a secret kept by the trees. Above all it was a time of untainted joy. The last one to be had for a while; for that was the February when Laura Palmer died. 

Shelly thought she knew everything dark and weird about Twin Peaks. Some of it wasn’t so bad. She liked mysteries and secrets. But after Laura died, it was like a great machine ground past a bit of metal which had been locking it up, and it unleashed a roar from deep inside. Leo was a suspect. He had a bloody shirt. And he’d been having sex with Laura. Shelly felt it like a dull thud inside. Her husband had been having sex with Laura Palmer, and might have killed her. And she hid the bloody shirt he’d told her to wash, and he beat her and beat her. Meanwhile Bobby’s heart was open and screaming, a gaping wound, and Shelly was there to mend it. 

Back when Shelly had told Norma she and Leo were getting married, Norma screwed up her mouth and huffed as if she were preparing to say something, and then she shook her head and smiled a bit sadly. 

“Shelly, I hope you will be very happy. I also hope you’ll keep your job here and not just stay and keep house for your husband. You’re important to me. I guess you know that. I should probably tell you not to throw your youth away or something like that, but when I was your age I wouldn’t have listened. My mom used to say that trying to talk a teenager out of a romance was like trying to screw the lid off a jar the wrong way.” 

Oh, Norma. There were so many things that Shelly couldn’t tell her about, she’d be disappointed and that would hurt so bad. They told each other plenty, of course – Shelly knew why Norma’s husband wasn’t around anymore, for one thing, and Norma was one to talk about teenagers when she and Ed Hurley had been making eyes at each other and probably way more than that.  They’d been high school sweethearts. Then they had to go and get married to other people. 

Shelly was pretty sure she understood Norma now, because there was no way she was going to stop loving Bobby Briggs. The more she found out about Twin Peaks every day, the surer she became that just about everyone was at least a little bad. She could be bad. She wasn’t going to wait around for anything anymore. They were going to give each other the entire world and feed it to each other like a big slab of cherry pie. She'd kill for it.

[floweringgodhead]

Caspar David Friedrich, "Seashore by Moonlight"

"I am, I thought, a tragedy; a character that he comes to see act: now and then he gives me my cue that I may make a speech more to his purpose: perhaps he is already planning a poem in which I am to figure. I am a farce and play to him, but to me this is all dreary reality: he takes all the profit and I bear all the burth."

-- Mary Shelley, Matilda

Percy, cmon bro cmon your kids are dead, you haven't reared one, and your wife's feeling like this, this?

A couple years ago when I read Charlotte Gordon's Romantic Outlaws (I think there are accuracy issues with the book but I still really enjoyed reading it) at the point where after Percy's death Mary struggles to sift through his journals, his papers, his scribbles, his drawings, so she can produce a critical edition of his work; Gordon mentions how this was likely the first time Mary read the poems Percy wrote following the deaths of their children (but particularly after William's death, his favorite and thus the more pained ones); some of them were more specific to the children but many were about the larger scale of the experience of mourning and underscored Mary's emotional withdrawal from him. The indication is that Mary must have felt not only anguished at discovering the thoughts their relationship was too strained for her husband to have voiced to her but that the poems made her regretful (Richard Holmes made similar claims in The Pursuit during one of his strange, anti-Mary interpretations of Shelley's life: "oh that thinking woman's going to rue being mean to poor Percy so bad") for how she treated him, andddd this quote has got me thinking about that.

I have two thoughts: (1 even if scholars enjoy analyzing her work contextually with her life -- to the same utmost degree they study other romantic writers this way -- Mary herself viewed biographical interpretation of her work as futile, that such readings were incompatible with her purposes. In a letter she says, "I am a great enemy to the prevailing custom of dragging private life before the world." Given that, it's perfectly reasonable, and respectable, to read this as more a beautiful example of the aesthetics of grief and suffering than a personal revelation, and she was one of the greatest stylists of our time so there's no arguing that that would've somehow been beyond her power. But that doesn't stop us from speculating and (2, I'm wondering if maybe this passage could reveal another possibility of Mary's reaction to the poems than what Gordon offers. It had to have hurt. She lost almost everyone she loved at a heartbreakingly young age and would mourn Percy for the rest of her life, but I wonder if she might not have felt so much shock (which is what many suggest) as her expectations met. If we do read this quote biographically, it shows that she knows how Percy worked, how he processed his emotions -- she wouldn't have been surprised to discover then that he's using his personal experience, and hers, to write poetry. I.e., she's grieving so that means that "perhaps he is already planning a poem in which I am to figure."

But it could also just show that, as an artist, she knows how the mind of one works and the lengths they go to for inspiration -- who knows

This has all mostly been to say that Matilda, like all of her non-Frankenstein works, is painfully underappreciated and everyone should go read it right now