#I thought too hard about what/who exactly the winter fairy/time devil is and made up a whole headcanon about him and what he stands for

[white-weasel]

Writing something about Zirk. Meant for it to just be a quick “Fia and Henry find out about Zirk’s deal with the fairy.” I have instead written 2k and we’re just getting to the part where Fia comes in and is going to start the conversation

[onthevirgeofdestruction]

Tied in Green

Words: 5,858 Content Warnings: Food, Lonliness, Magical S//H in a weird way?  Characters: Remus (POV), Roman, Virgil Ships: Dukexiety Rating: T Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort

FFN Mirror - Playlist 

   Remus isn’t ashamed of himself. He agrees that sometimes he doesn’t like the things that suck him in. The things that he can’t get out of his head and make him feel horrible for even thinking. Those things upset him, too. But ultimately, he’s not ashamed of who he is or what he likes. But he’s pretty certain everyone else is. 

   He doesn’t keep friends for very long. His mom pushes him aside more often than not. Remus can be himself in private, but not here, she says. It’s what she always says. People will laugh at his jokes in school, but they never actually want to hang out. Remus is alone again, listening to his brother and friends laugh in the other room. They sound like they’re having fun and he’s jealous. But he knows better than to ask to join. He would do something to ruin it for Roman, anyway. Remus knocked twice at his desk.

   Roman gets all awkward and weird and it’s clearly just a pity invite even if Remus did ask to join. They don’t make fun of him, but there’s not much of an effort to include him either. Roman and his friends don’t let him in on inside jokes, don’t ask his opinions, and sometimes talked like he’s not there. They acknowledge him if he talks, but that’s it. Remus doesn’t get included, which hurts more than sitting alone, sometimes.

   Remus only wanted to spend time with his brother. His friends are always over and Remus never has the chance anymore. He’s too busy with his homework when they’re not over. He missed Roman. And Remus couldn’t deny that it hurt that Roman always seemed to make time for his friends, but never for Remus.

   They used to be inseparable. His mom used to joke that they were twins because Remus never acted his age and they looked so alike. They weren’t supposed to grow apart. When they were kids, they planned on having adventures together. But this was the third time this week alone that Remus is stuck listening to Roman playfully bicker with his friends the next room over.

   The headphones weren’t enough sometimes, and tonight was one of those times. Remus sighed and dropped his computer headphones on his desk. He wasn’t paying any attention to this book, anyway. They were playing a four-player game with three players and kept lamenting that the game was too hard. But they never asked him to join. He kept hoping they would. He considered just going over and inviting himself, but he didn’t feel like being pitied today. And what if he said something? What if he did something? Remus rapped his knuckle on the desk again.

   Remus slipped on his boots and a windbreaker and headed out of his room, glancing into Roman’s open door as he passed. They were laughing at a TV show together. He headed down the stairs with a sigh. “I’m going for a walk, ma,” Remus called into his mother’s office as he passed and she held her finger over her lips while she was on the phone. Right. Remus headed out the front door and locked up behind himself.

   The fall night was enchanting. It was somewhat chilly for a windbreaker, but Remus welcomed it. Remus enjoyed having sleeves to play with, so he liked fall and winter. This windbreaker has a zipper on the cuff that Remus fiddled with while he walked down the street. He didn’t have anywhere in mind to go, honestly. He just wanted to get out of there. It didn’t feel right. 

   He could go to the corner store that was near his house that had a great selection of weird gummy candies. He could also go for some pizza-flavoured chips. This was a stomach ache waiting to happen, but Remus wasn’t exactly known for self-control. He was known for taking dares from strangers and getting suspended for scaling the wall of the school just to see if he could.

   He kicked at an acorn as he walked down the sidewalk with his hands in his pockets. He was going to eat an entire package of pizza chips and he knew it. And they always made his breath smell like throw up, which Remus thought was incredibly cool that the flavourings could taste so good and smell so bad as soon as they got wet. 

   No one else liked his pizza-chip breath, though. Actually, he was the only one he knew who liked those pizza chips. Sour cream and onion sounded good, too. He liked to eat them with the pizza chips. If you got the right brands of chips, it was like eating pizza and ranch. His mom might get mad at him for just leaving to buy snacks at the corner store, so he’d need a way to hide the bag from her.

   Remus wished he knew how to reign himself in, he honestly did. He was always running his mouth and getting himself in trouble before he even knew what was happening. He knew he could be unpleasant, too. And he was worried about what he was capable of. Remus had some bad thoughts and dark knowledge and he didn’t want to act on them, but they were there. He knew how to do lots of bad things. In a weak moment he could, right? He didn’t want to… but…

   He tried his hardest, but he wasn’t soft and cuddly. Roman’s friend Patton was sweet and nice and Remus would give anything just to sit with him and watch a movie sometime. Patton talked through movies, too. They could whisper to each other and split a bowl of popcorn. It would be amazing. Patton smelled like fabric softener and made Remus feel bubbly with delight.

   But Remus unsettled Patton. He was too nice to say it, but Roman asked him to dial it back for Patton’s sake more than once. Logan at least was interested when Remus brought up interesting things that popped into his head. But Remus had seen Patton recoil before. And Roman would sigh and roll his eyes and tell Remus that they shouldn’t talk about that. Patton would apologize sometimes. 

   That generally made Remus feel worse because it’s not like he intended to freak out Patton, but it wasn’t Patton’s fault for not liking the subject matter, either. They just came out of Remus’s mouth and it was his inability to not run his mouth that was the cause. Remus pulled at the zipper a few times, feeling bad all over again for it. It had been a while since Remus’s last fuck up with Patton, but Remus never forgot. He knew he should stop pining pointlessly.

   Someone was coming up on the sidewalk drew Remus’s eye and out of his self-pity pit. It looked like there was a fellow weirdo out tonight. Someone in a stylistic fox mask and a trench coat was coming down towards Remus on the sidewalk from over the small hill Remus had to walk up to get to the corner store. The outfit reminded Remus of a comic book villain. Actually, if they flipped the fox mask for a kabuki one, they’d basically be Yokai from Big Hero Six. Remus wondered what a cosplayer or whatever was doing on a nighttime walk, and also if Remus could join them. Remus had a mostly put-together Deathstroke cosplay in his closet he could go put on.

   “Hey, can I ask what the costume is? It looks great,” Remus waved when he got close enough for the stranger to hear.

   “Thanks, but this is just me,” The stranger shrugged, walking up to Remus. “How would you like to be someone else, though?” The stranger asked out of absolutely nowhere.

   “I’d give anything,” Remus replied before he even considered it.

   “Even your soul?” The stranger asked, and Remus stopped to weigh his options. What was Remus doing with his soul, anyway? “I kid, you don’t actually have to think about that,” The stranger chuckled out a deep rattling noise that shook their whole torso while they shook their head. “Nothing so permanent. How about some time?” They offered again, an amused smile barely peeking out from under the mask.

   “Like sitting through a seminar or something?” Remus asked, shifting his weight on his feet and furrowing his eyebrows.

   “No, that’s so dreadfully boring. Just a bit off the end for as long as you use what I’m offering. It’s a very fair trade,” They reassured him dismissively. This was red flag central for some grade-A weird, dangerous shit. Awesome. Not awesome? Remus wasn’t sure. He still wanted to be someone else.

   “Oh, is this some deal with the devil shit?” Remus hummed curiously, still not sure how to parse this situation.

   “No, no. Not affiliated. Just someone that gets called the devil often. I’m sure you can relate,” The masked stranger waved their hands.

   “Boy, do I ever,” Remus agreed and crossed his arms. Remus’s stupid suggestions often got him in the hot seat. Not that he didn’t deserve it, but… “The exact amount of time? Not some stupid equation where I’m getting screwed like a prom date?” Remus did the smart thing and double-check for once instead of his impulsiveness taking the wheel.

   “Damn, who are you dealing with usually? No, the exact amount of time. Second per second off the natural lifespan. If you started taking better care of yourself, you’d barely lose a thing,” They shrugged, speaking as if they didn’t understand the distrust.

   “What’s in it for you?” Remus furrowed his eyebrows at the masked stranger, tapping his finger on his crossed arms.

   “I get the time and the entertainment value of it all. The paranormal gets boring without doing this kind of thing every once in a while,” The stranger twisted their hand in the air and leaned on one leg. They put their hand on their hip and looked Remus up and down. 

   Remus was still suspicious about the whole thing. Something-something and deals with the fae? Not that this looked like a fairy or anything. Actually, how would Remus know how to identify the fae? The fae could look like anything, and Remus doesn’t have any iron on him. 

   “Iron does nothing to me, anyway. Soft and cuddly, right? Something Patton would like? I’ve got just the thing,” They held up a finger and a bright green ribbon materialized around it.

   “Ah, didn’t realize you were listening,” Remus chuckled to himself. The stranger clearly knew what Remus wanted. He hoped that was the only thing they heard, though. “You know what, fuck me up, fam,” Remus declared, holding up his hand in the air triumphantly. The ribbon appeared in Remus’s hand and he gripped it enthusiastically.

   “Just tie it onto yourself. Take it off to be human again, so put it somewhere easy to reach. And if it goes more than a small distance from you, it’ll show up in your hand again. This is only yours, so don’t bother trying to use it on someone else or giving it away. It’ll never work. If you try to show it off, it also won’t work, because that’s a fucking headache. You’ll have to change somewhere private. Have fun and try not to get yourself killed, please. That sucks for the both of us,” They sounded delighted while Remus looked at the silky ribbon. It was a bright green, like fresh leaves in spring and not subtle at all. Exactly his style. Remus shoved the ribbon in his pocket and bowed deeply, twisting his hand in front of him and stepping one leg to the side.

   “So what does it do?” Remus asked, looking up to the masked stranger from his bow. They had lifted their mask just enough for Remus to make out a sharp-toothed grin as they faded from existence. Well, that was delightfully creepy. “Oh, points for style,” Remus hummed, and he made out the faintest deep cackle that also faded away. 

   What a nice… whatever that was. Mysterious entities that could read thoughts and create things from nothing were good in Remus’s book. He felt the ribbon between his fingers in his pocket. It felt pleasantly warm. He could find out what it did by putting it on. But this probably wasn’t private enough to use it. He was out in the open. Maybe it only mattered if people were looking at him? Well, he still had his chip-acquisition duty to get to.

   Remus resumed his walk down the street. He couldn’t have anticipated a depression walk resulting in a deal with a demon or whatever, but it certainly was a better outcome than usual. He continued to feel the toasty ribbon in his pocket as he walked down the road. The possibilities filled his mind as he trekked on. Soft and cuddly, huh? Another Patton? That would be weird. A bear? Bears probably aren’t cuddly for very long. Remus would love to be a bear, though. Remus, but capable of fighting his impulsiveness? Unrealistic, even for magic.

   Were there… weird magic people always listening to his thoughts? He really hoped not. Remus had some awful thoughts. Terrible, horrible, sickening thoughts. Thoughts he was always thankful that at least no one could hear. And someone heard. Magical beings probably wouldn’t listen all the time, right? If they were listening to all of his thoughts, they never would have talked with Remus. Or they would have treated Remus way worse. He also couldn’t imagine some weird magical entity wanting to listen to Remus thinking about what cooked stink bugs might smell like and what he would look like with a giraffe neck even when he wasn’t having shitty thoughts. Maybe they only listened out for random wishes. Was that a genie? No, there weren’t three wishes and the fox mask demon got something in return.

   He should be more concerned about literally cutting his life short with a magic ribbon, but he wasn’t. Remus couldn’t think out that far. Every time he questioned if it was the right idea, he wondered what he got to turn into. It was something non-human, and it seemed like the random magic stranger didn’t like things that would make a big kerfuffle, so it was probably something that would blend in. It made the most sense with what they said. Unless it was all a trick, anyway.

   Remus opened the convenience store door and made a bee-line to the snacks aisle. He grabbed some gummy brains and rats and examined the shelf for anything else. Candy moustaches? Sure, why not? Remus turned aisles to grab chips and headed up to the register, also tossing up a bottle of soda from a cooler near the register. 

   The cashier kept one eye on the TV while checking Remus out, not even acknowledging him. That was normal, at least. Remus waved after he picked up his bag of snacks, but the cashier was staunchly watching the TV again. He cracked open the bags of chips to snack on as he walked down the sidewalk, taking a handful of each flavour and shoving them all into his mouth at once.

   It was a tasty combo. If Remus ate them down enough, he could roll the bags and make them easier to sneak past everyone, and since they were open, he’d have to eat them evenly, anyway. It was a win-win. Maybe not for Remus’s life span, but that was years out and Remus didn’t know how to even conceptualize that. He could start jogging or something. That’s healthy, right? Probably not enough to cancel out eating an entire bag’s worth of potato chips on the way home. But he already planned on doing that and just because he got a magic ribbon didn’t mean he needed to go changing his very important impulsive plans.

   How did his lifespan work, anyway? Mm, chips. Remus decided he didn’t care. Was that an awful thought? Well, maybe as long as it was only Remus’s life span. It’s kind of like deciding to only eat fast food or something. He could ask the mysterious fox mask person if he ever saw them again, but otherwise, there wasn’t much else to do about it. He had more important things to do, like make sure he ate the same amount of chips from each bag.

   The walk back to his house went much faster as Remus gorged himself on chips. He rolled up the remaining chips bags so they wouldn’t stick out of the shopping bag. Perfect, now he shouldn’t have to share if Roman saw and his mom won’t see and he won’t get in trouble. He still had a random grocery bag, but maybe luck would be on his side. He didn’t want to share any of this. It would throw off the balance of the bags.

   The front door unlocked with a click and Remus stepped in, locking up behind himself. He glanced at the wall clock and realized the trip took a solid forty-five minutes longer than it should have. Does talking with weird demons warp time? He hoped he wasn’t in trouble. He could legally be out, but his mother didn’t like him wandering around at night getting in trouble. Remus walked down the hall, waving to his mom in the office. She didn’t even look up from her computer. What was she doing working that late, anyway? 

   Roman’s bedroom door was closed as he passed it. Remus sighed as he stepped into his bedroom and closed the door behind him. He had no reason to worry; it seemed. Nobody cared that he came home safe. Remus kicked off his shoes, which thudded on the floor, and dropped off the snacks bag on his desk.

   Remus looked around the room and reached into his pocket. Well, it was the moment of truth. Did Remus hate being perceived in the manner he was so much he was willing to literally shorten his lifespan to be something else? He stared at the ribbon. Finding out what it was he could turn into would help him decide, right? This should be an important decision. Or something. He didn’t care anymore. Remus put his foot upon his desk chair and tied the ribbon into a bow on his ankle. As soon as the ribbons pulled into place, Remus felt overwhelmingly dizzy. Like he did a backflip into another dimension and out again.

   His brain wasn’t working at first. There was so much new input he didn’t expect that it took him a moment to settle into even comprehending. Things were brighter and louder and stronger smelling. And… taller. Or he was significantly smaller. He did not know yet. Remus stumbled and fell over, reaching up for his head. There were no fingers, though, only a paw pad pressing into a damp nose. Huh. Remus closed his eyes and tried to get his bearings. He swore he had better senses and spatial awareness. Remus wobbled over to the floor-length mirror after he pulled himself up.

   That was the largest cat he’d ever seen, staring back at him with bright spring-green eyes in the mirror. It was not a cat breed he’d recognized. He was thick with fluff and had tawny grey fur spotted with black tabby markings. Remus swished his tail and spun around, looking at himself before turning back to the mirror. A big fluffy cat certainly fit the bill. Remus wanted to pet himself, even. 

   Walking on all fours didn’t take any adjusting to after he gained his bearings, and there was no pile of clothes where he was, so magic must have been helping Remus to adjust. His tail was weirding him out, though. He could only control it if it consciously focused on it, but otherwise, it swished about without his input.

   He licked his paw and ran it across the top of his head to make the big gray tuft there stick straight up. Other than being probably three times the size of his nana’s house cat, Remus was pretty cute. He sat on the floor and examined himself. He should turn back, right? No, he should check stuff out to help him decide. Remus headed around his room.

   Things were bizarre at this height, but it was an interesting type of strange. Remus weaved under his desk chair and went under the desk. It was a nice hidey-hole as a cat. He disliked small spaces less; it was comfortable under here. He pushed his head on the corner of the desk and his eyes widened. Fuck, that feels nice. No wonder cats do it all the time. Remus pushed his head against the side of the desk a few more times.

   Remus looked up at his loft bed. Could he get up there? Remus backed up across the room to get a running start and had to swerve to dodge the bed frame. Fuck, he was faster than he expected. He backed up to jump on top of his dresser instead and made it easily in a single leap. Remus primed himself for the wide gap at the edge of the dresser and bounded, landing easily in the middle of the bed. Wow, he could leap farther than he thought, too. It might have helped that he was big. He dug around in the sheets and curled up. Being a cat wasn’t the most fun possible choice when magic was involved, but he was loving every second of this.

   He hopped down with silent ease off the bed and jumped up to work the knob. It took him multiple tries to grip it, but he got the door open and walked next door to Roman’s room. The door was closed, but that was no match for his monster kitty paws now that he knew the trick. Remus opened the door with ease and strutted into the bedroom. Roman was doing homework with his headphones on at the floor-height table. He bounced his knee while he sat bent over the textbook and his notebook, humming along to the music.

   “Yeah?” Roman’s eyes moved to the door after a lag while he finished writing something. “Oh!” Roman chuckled to himself. “Did Remus bring you home or something?” Roman asked, holding out his hand. Remus walked up and sniffed Roman’s hand to keep up the act. It smelled strongly of pencil graphite and notebook paper, but there was a faint hint of some sugar cookies under that. 

   Remus bumped his head into Roman’s hand and Roman pet him. Remus thought it would feel more like a massage, but it was mostly that the motion was soothing. It made Remus feel safe and comfortable and loved. The petting was smooth and made his brain tingle in the best way. Remus flopped down on the floor next to Roman, who kept petting him. Roman leaned to look into the empty hallway.

   “Re?” Roman called out, and Remus meowed in reply. “Hm. You’re very smart to get the door open, but stay out of my mom’s office. She won’t mind if you visit us, but she doesn’t like pets,” Roman warned Remus. He was well aware. Can’t please everyone. Remus laid his head against Roman’s leg and started purring. It must have been reflexive because he couldn’t stop even if he wanted to.

   Roman continued petting Remus slowly while he went back to his homework. Remus’s ears twitched at the small noises the pencil made against the paper. He wouldn’t mind just sitting here doing homework quietly with Roman as a human, either. Maybe he could try again. But not right now. He couldn’t describe how happy he was to relax with Roman and get affection like this. It was honestly worth any minutes he lost off the end of his life. 

   What were minutes, anyway? They didn’t make a difference in the long run. Remus wasted minutes of his life on absolute shit. This was worth it. Remus closed his eyes and relaxed, listening to the muted sounds of Roman’s music and the rustling of pages while Roman worked. The time passed and Remus never second-guessed the use of his time again.

   “Hey, kitty. I’ve got to get ready for bed. C’mon, let’s get you back to Remus,” Roman alerted him, standing up. Roman stretched out his legs. Remus meowed in objection and rubbed against Roman’s jeans. Roman moved past Remus and headed out his bedroom door into the hall. Remus followed, rolling his eyes. Roman pushed open Remus’s door the rest of the way and stuck his head in. “Remus—” Roman stopped talking and looked around the bedroom. 

   “Huh. I wonder where he is,” Roman hummed. He squatted down and signed, picking up Remus. “I guess I’ll take you back out myself,” Roman told him, and Remus meowed in objection again. “Sorry, kitty, we don’t have food or a bathroom for you. You can come to visit again, though. I don’t know exactly where Remus found you,” Roman explained evenly and headed downstairs. He unlocked the backdoor and dropped Remus outside. Remus spun around to glare at Roman before bolting back into the house.

   “Cat, no!” Roman shot quietly, holding out his hand. Remus bounded up the stairs and rushed into his room. He couldn’t pull the door closed, so he rushed under his loft and yanked at the curtain before pulling off the ribbon with his teeth.

   That dimension-hopping sensation overwhelmed Remus again, and he fell against his desk while the world did a triple somersault and took him with it. Remus ran his hand through his hair and exhaled hard, the air hissing through his teeth. He held his head with both hands and filled his lungs completely. The world didn’t smell as strong as a human. He let out the air slowly.

   “Kitty,” Roman whispered, sticking his head into Remus’s room. “Kitty, where are you?”

   “I’ll handle it, Ro,” Remus informed him, pulling open the curtain on his loft bed to look at Roman.

   “Oh! I didn’t see you in there. Cute cat. It’s almost bedtime, so hurry,” Roman waved and stood up straight.

   “G’night,” Remus waved back.

   “Oh. Yeah. You too,” Roman sighed and turned into the hall. Remus slowly pulled himself up to his feet. The dizziness was all gone, but he was still disoriented from the missing senses and the height. Remus was so tall. How did he never notice?

   Remus needed some contingency stuff. He pulled a fashion scarf out of his dresser and tied it onto the doorknob so Remus could pull his door closed. Well, there was still the potential of getting locked out if he left and couldn’t turn back… Remus glanced at the window. It’s the second story, so it’s not a big deal if he left it unlocked, right? Remus didn’t know how he’d get up there just yet, but maybe he could jump from the tree? The gap was wide for a human, but as a cat, he should be okay. Maybe he could change back and move some stuff around in the backyard. Remus unlocked the window with a small nod to himself.

   He started to get ready for bed but ended up glancing at the window again. Maybe he should make sure he can make the gap, right? Remus kicked off his socks and opened up the window enough to get out, pulling out the screen and leaning it against the wall. He crawled through and sat on the slanted roof and closed the window again. He took a deep breath of the night air and looked up at the moon. 

   A good night to prowl. He tied the ribbon on his ankle and turned into a cat again. It was much easier this time, though it was still extremely disorienting. Remus waited to regain his sense of up and down before standing up and walking along the ledge of the roof towards the big honkin’ American Elm in the backyard. Roman and Remus’s tire swing still hung from a low, thick branch.

   Remus primed himself and took a running leap of faith towards the Elm. He soared across the gap easily and ended up overshooting just barely able to sink his claws in another branch in time and avoided hitting one that was on his lower left and tumbled to the ground. Remus scrambled to pull himself up and took a deep breath for his pounding heart.

   He looked down, and it looked like he was miles from the ground. He suddenly understood how cats got caught in trees because this was freaky. Remus knew intellectually that he could hop down to a lower branch or jump for the tire swing. The branch he was on didn’t allow for much mobility, so he made a hail-mary for the tire swing, landing in the net over the hole and getting his paw caught while the tire swing swung from the motion. Remus hissed at the net and pulled his foot out carefully before hopping down to the ground.

   Well. That was scary-awesome. But Remus was a free cat right now who happened to be able to jump farther than Remus could even comprehend. Remus made a run for the fence and used his back claws to propel himself up the fence and bounded over easily. He jumped down into the grass and ran for the sake of it. 

   All the fun of running away without actually doing so. There was a playground they used to go to as kids that Remus wanted to check out. It was long since not fun anymore, but as a cat, who knows? Remus wanted to feel like a kid again. He was too amped up to sleep anyway, and he was once again at a height he could enjoy a playground at and it was all he could think of.

   He bounded across yards and down the lane. The public park was between Remus’s neighbourhood and the apartment complex next door, so Remus had to make two blocks on much smaller feet. He was moving much faster, though, and had more endurance. He enjoyed the wind in his face as he ran down the lane.

   The playground’s parking lot was lit, but the playground itself sat shrouded in darkness. That was no problem for Remus’s cat eyes, though. They adjusted almost instantaneously as he stepped into the shade and walked into the park. The playscape was probably not comfortable on his paws, but there were other things to check out, still. Remus walked past the play structure. The web might be fun. That was still kind of fun as an adult. The park was technically closed, though, and he couldn’t play on it while kids were here. He could hurt one of them or someone would think he’s a pervert, and he’d get in trouble and go to jail.

   Remus wasn’t alone out here. There sat a person who looked Remus’s age sitting on the swings. Their head hung limply, and they held onto the chain at eye height. They were barely swinging at all. It was more like a minor despondent sway. They looked really miserable. Remus couldn’t swing as a cat, but he also was curious about the other stranger. One stranger tonight gave Remus magic powers, so random night strangers were much more interesting now. 

   That fact alone made Remus also wanted to return the favour to the universe if he could. The fox-masked being cheered Remus up. Maybe Remus could cheer up the sad person who appeared to be 70% hoodie by volume and kicking at the pebbles under the swings. Remus walked up in front of the person and sat down, meowing. Their head was down and their hood was up, so Remus couldn’t see their face.

   The stranger didn’t look up from soundlessly staring down at nothing. Remus stepped closer, meowing again. He looked up at the stranger’s face from the ground. They looked empty. Their eyes were unfocused and their expression was somewhere between numb and desolate. Remus meowed louder, and the stranger blinked. They recoiled their head and rubbed their eyes, blinking a few more times before their eyes focused enough to notice Remus.

   “Oh. Hey,” The stranger greeted Remus. Remus rubbed against the person’s legs. He hoped they weren’t allergic. They watched Remus weave around their legs for what felt like an eternity, but they never sniffled, so it seemed okay for now. “You’re really friendly, huh?” The person reached down their hand and Remus bumped into their hand right away.

   The sad person let out a weak chuckle through their nose and scratched at Remus’s chin. Remus froze for a moment and pushed down into the stranger’s hand to help them scratch harder. That was better than pets. That made Remus feel like his entire body was tingling with elation. The stranger stopped scratching and sat up on the swing. But Remus wasn’t having that. He jumped up and deposited himself right on the person’s lap.

   “Woah,” The stranger seemed amused and went back to gently scratching behind Remus’s ear. Remus purred like a motorboat idling on a lake. One that might explode and kill twenty bystanders and sink a dinghy named Frank. Remus’s back leg twitched automatically as he settled down. He was probably vibrating the entire stranger he purred so hard.

   When the stranger stopped again, Remus meowed and licked at their hand, sitting limply next to Remus again. “You’re kind of needy,” The stranger sounded amused, switching to petting Remus with their other hand instead. Remus carefully laid down and licked the stranger’s hand again. 

   Remus liked it when cats did this, so he hoped this person would, too. They reached up to rub their eyes again and paused, sniffing the air. They sniffed again and tried smelling where Remus licked them. 

   “Fuck, cat, that’s noxious. What the hell did you eat?” They snickered, putting their hand back down. Remus tried to say ‘chips’, but a weird meow came out instead, so he rested his head on the stranger’s hand.

   “Do you belong to someone?” The person asked curiously. They sat up more and looked around the area. They dug around at the thick fur on Remus’s neck and hummed in dissatisfaction. “A nice cat like you deserves a good home. It’s not safe out here for you,” They shook their head and went back to petting them. “But thanks for visiting,” They smiled down at Remus. “I’ve got school, I should get going,” They sounded sad, but Remus jumped off and spun around to sit and watch them get up.

   The stranger dragged themselves off the swing and waved to Remus. Remus meowed and waved a paw back, which made the stranger give a small smile in return. Remus had school too, so he should probably get home. But he got them to smile, so it satisfied the need to do something nice for the world in return as he bounded down the street back towards his house.

---

personal taglist: @elizabutgayer @ollyollyoxinfree 

The Taglist Repository (ask to be removed): 

Everything: @katelynn-a-fan @dwbh888 @royal-stormcloud @thefivecalls @awkwardjester @intruxiety@brain-deadx0 @the-grounded-raven@just-your-typical-trans-guy

Remus-Centric: @thatgaydemigodnerd @aceawkwardunicorn @hekking-happy-nonsense

Dukexiety: @a-fandom-trashdump

Hurt/Comfort:@callboxkat @nonasficcollection @supernovainthenightsky @evoodo123 @idont-freaking-know @hekking-happy-nonsense @cottonwoolsocks @aceawkwardunicorn @somehow-i-got-an-account @enby-ralsei

Cuddles: @idont-freaking-know @aceawkwardunicorn @enby-ralsei

[deltaengineering]

Winter Anime 2019 Part 4: That’s all, folks.

Over already? This is a pretty thin season with not a lot of shows, so it’s not that surprising that there’s not many good ones either. Still, a weak showing. Oh well, let’s get it over with. There were a few decent ones in the last batch.

Circlet Princess

What: Dimwitted schoolgirl is good at some vaguely defined virtual fighting sport, changes school based on it, finds out relevant club has been abolished. Forecast says: 5 member plot incoming.

❌ I think it’s already clear this show isn’t very ambitious, and not very well written either. A game adaptation at its laziest.

❌❌ Man, this girl is STUPID. What the hell.

❌ The rest of the cast are less stupid (which isn’t hard), but that just means they’re so forgettable they might as well not exist.

❌❌ It looks cheap, and by that I mean really really cheap. The character design is ISO standard anime and it’s mostly on model, but that’s as good as it gets. The animation just sucks. That’s a death sentence for an action/sports show with terrible characters.

Bermuda Triangle - Colorful Pastrale

What: Japanese Spongebob, as in cute mermaids. Doing things optional.

❌ To make this quick, this is almost exactly Pastel Memories, only every problem is just a little less extreme. It has fewer characters, it’s looking slightly better, there’s a tiny bit more going on, the setting is mildly more interesting. That still means it is:

❌❌ 1. A boring mess in which a handful of samey girls do nothing of much interest in a location that should be unique, but isn’t.

❌❌ 2. Conspicuously cheap. It even has the same sightline problems.

❌❌ 3. Featuring a character model sheet that is “off” even under the best circumstances. This time due to the very offputting decision to give everyone blobby triangular irises.

❌❌ Unlike Pastel Memories (which was an ad for a mobile game) this is an anime original, so it really has no excuse being this lame.

♎ I find it amusing that Pastel Palettes are providing the OP for an anime, and it’s not the one currently airing that they’re actually characters in.

Endro~!

What: Kiraralike comedy thing in a generic JRPG setting.

♎ Namori character designs, so it’s like Spyce in that it just seems like the Yuru Yuri cast cosplaying a genre. But hey, Namori character designs do look good.

❌ I’m not as done with generic JRPG settings as with generic isekai settings, but it’s still a real problem since the former is now a subset of the latter. Mildly making fun of it does not improve things much either.

✅ The tone is cutesy and pleasant. I find this much preferable to something like Mahoujin Guru Guru, which is pretty much the same thing but with abrasive, high-intensity slapstick instead.

✅ It’s backing that up with generally high-quality, agreeable pastel looks.

❌ Not being annoying is a start, but beyond that this seems very middle of the road and predictable. I don’t get much out of the genre “parody” and simply being cute is still not an unique selling point in anime.

Grimms Notes The Animation

What: Did someone say JRPG? This is a mobile one, vaguely based on fairy tales as the title implies.

✅ This universe runs on the idea that every NPC’s fate is controlled by a preset story they’re aware of. You could make a good story about that if you took it seriously. It even does that somewhat, but only to the degree that you’d expect from a throwaway sidequest in a moderately well-written JRPG.

❌ And the reason for that is that it has to make room for being a JRPG, of course. Read: It’s irritatingly mechanics- and combat-focused. Stuff like the characters changing form when in fights just seems overly complicated and adds nothing.

❌ Said combat looks competent, but not good enough to make up for detracting from what could have been an interesting setting. Merc Storia did this aspect far better (by usually not doing it at all).

❌ So it ends up being better than expected, but then that only amounts to a disappointment.

Kaguya-sama wa Kokurasetai / Kaguya-sama: Love Is War

What: Kaguya and Miyuki are in the student council of a prestigious school and HATE HATE HATE each other. Specifically, they hate the part where the other one won’t just finally admit their love.

✅ The joke here is that it’s operating on full intensity at all times, over the most simple matters. It’s pretty much Kaiji, only about dating - complete with hammy narrator. This is another one of those shows where I can’t say with certainty that it’s solid, but I had a blast during the first episode.

✅ Regarding Quintuplets, I made it clear that I love me some sparks in my romantic comedies. It doesn’t get much more explosive than this.

✅ The characters are comparable to Quints too: Smart scheming upstart vs. rich scheming ojou, with a simpleminded girl in the middle that ends up winning more often than not simply by not overdoing it.

✅ The visuals are just as over the top as the proceedings depicted. Occasionally a filter massacre, but mostly cool.

♎ The long-term viability of this show depend entirely on whether they can consistently come up with scenarios that work, which isn’t a given. Also, this is so intense it might become tiresome - I already felt some fatigue towards the end of the first episode. We’ll see, I guess.

Kakegurui ××

What: Some weirdos think they can crash the party at Hyakkaou with an intent to scare the daylights out of Yumeko and Midari, of all people. Let’s just say they were not as prepared as they thought.

✅ As you might have guessed by me watching the sequel, I liked Kakegurui. It has its problems, but if you’re down for some crazypants madness, this show delivers.

✅ This is one of the better episodes of it too, because it gets right into it and the game they play is dead simple. Kakegurui was never about smart moves or strong characters, so not having anything detract from our girls deriving the entirely wrong sort of pleasure from danger is a plus.

♎ Sadly, the OP is a step down (though still great) and the ED is simply an inferior, overcomplicated version of the magnificent original one. They seem to know this too, because they play the OP cut of Deal with the Devil in its entirety for a montage. The rest of the production is on par with the original though, so it’s fiiiine. Oh well.

❌ It got Netflix’d again and the subs situation is dire. Since this is one I actually like, I might have to wait for the official release.

Kouya no Kotobuki Hikoutai / The Magnificent Kotobuki

What: Piston-engined fighter plane pornography.

✅ This delivers where Girly Air Force failed: Close to zero exposition, the majority of the episode is just planes dogfighting with barely any talking either. And that part is executed really well. I think the plane startup sequence alone is as long as the total of Girly’s airtime.

✅ Guess what, it’s Tsutomu Mizushima, previously known for unbridled panzer (und girls) pornography, and boy can you tell. However, this cuts out a lot of GuP’s bullshit: A plane doesn’t have the cast of K-ON in it, it’s not over-the-top zany, and whatever this universe is, it can’t be as insipid as GuP’s. The classy milwank exists you guys, we found it.

✅✅ The music really helps here, sky pirates vs zeppelins just wouldn’t work without some classic swashbuckling orchestra background. Fat sound mixing on the dakka too. It’s great.

♎ Can’t really say much about the narrative because we kinda skipped that in this episode aside from the obvious, but Mizushima’s Shirobako collaborator Michiko Yokote is writing it, and that’s a good sign.

❌ Now we’re getting to the elephant in the room though: There’s no way the planes wouldn’t be CG in 2019, but the characters are CG too, and their animation is mediocre. Also, they did the KADO thing where they 2D-animated the side characters that aren’t important enough to model. This has the funny side effect that you can tell who’s going to die real soon by them looking better. It’s far from great, but probably a worthy tradeoff if the mechanical side is this extensive and also delivers.

✅ This is definitely not for everyone, since you have to have more than a casual appreciation for those magnificent girls in their flying machines. I do, though.

revisions

What: A chunk of Shibuya gets teleported to the dystopian future, local doomsday prepper gets handed a large robot because he’s special.

❌ A Goro Taniguchi joint being a poorly conceived scifi mess? Say it ain’t so! I especially dig the tryhard English jargon (mecha: “String Puppet”, monsters faction: “Revisions”, particular monster, I think?: “Civilian”, tacticool operetah: “Balancer”).

❌ Works very hard to characterize the main character, to the detriment of everyone else. A for effort, but you made an unlikeable asshole though.

❌ This is another full CG show, with the quality of the animation being curiously variable. Sometimes it’s well above average and sometimes it’s painful. There doesn’t seem to be much method to it.

✅ Tries to establish stakes by being mondo edgy and graphically murderizing some poor bystanders. It’s adorable.

❌ If you’re really jonesing for some mecha, you can watch all of this on Netflix right now. It’s not like you have any alte- wait, Egao no Daika has mecha too. Well there you go then. That’s a better show.

[grayzaweek]

Prompt 8: Fairy Tale

“Daddy, will you tell me a story?”

“Sure. But you’re gonna hafta try and sleep after this, okay?”

“Okay.”

“Promise?”

“I promise.”

“Good girl. Now then. There was once a tiger. One day, it grew wings and flew away. It lived happily ever after. The end. Go to sleep.”

Pouting, the little girl kicked her feet up against the blanket. “That’s not a story! You cheated!”

“Alright, alright, calm down. Sheesh. You have your mom’s spirit, alright. So what kinda story d’you want?”

“A fairy tale.”

“Huh. Well then. I can do that.”

“You can?”

“Sure. Who d’you think I am?” He grinned proudly, watching the child’s face light up in joy. It was worth it. Just for her. “Okay. So. Far away, in a distant land-”

“What’s it called?”

“Hmm? Well. Let’s call it Ente Isla.”

“What’s it like?”

A wistful smile graced his features. “It was… magical. See, it consisted of five islands. One in the centre with the other four to the north, south, east and west of this central island.”

“Have you seen it?”

“D’you wanna hear the story, or d’you wanna ask questions?”

“Story, story!”

“Okay, then.” He gathered his thoughts. “Now on the western island, on a farm, lived a girl. A little older than you, and a little younger than me. She lived there with her father. We’ll call her Knightwalker. So-”

“Didn’t she have a mommy?”

“Who, Knightwalker? Sure she did. But her mommy was an angel, you see. She fell in love with the farmer, but Heaven didn’t allow this, so she couldn’t stay.”

“I don’t like Heaven.”

That made him laugh. “Good girl. Neither did I. Anyway, one day, some people from the Ente Islan Church arrived at their farm. They wanted to take Knightwalker away.”

“Why?”

“To train her to be a hero. Since her mommy was an angel, she had some sorta weird angelic power. She was the only one of her kind that the Church knew of.”

“Girls can be heroes?”

“Oftentimes the best heroes are girls. You’ll see one day.” He grinned and ruffled her hair. The girl giggled.

“But why did they need to take her away?”

“You see, the King of the Demons had raised an army and wanted to take over Ente Isla. A few days after she left, her farm was attacked and her dad died.” The girl’s face crumpled. He gently took her hand in his. “So Knightwalker was the only one who could stop these demons. So she trained and trained and trained. She trained really hard and became a Hero. She freed the western island first, then north and east and south before marching on the middle island.” He paused and lowered his voice. “To fight the Demon King himself.”

Her eyes widened. “She fought the Demon King?”

“She did, she did!” He nodded for effect. “Kicked his butt too.”

“She beat the Demon King?”

“Not exactly.” He smiled. “She would’ve. She cut off one of his horns. But before she could finish him off, he created a magical portal to another world and ran away. The Hero went after him, however.”

“What happened next?”

“No idea. Nobody knows.”

The girl pouted again, and he laughed and patted her forehead. “Now go to sleep.”

“Okay, okay. I hope she kills him though.”

“Hmm?”

“I hope Knightwalker kills the Demon King.”

That gave him pause. He was quiet awhile as he stroked the girl’s hair until she fell asleep. When she finally drifted off, he rose to his feet and clicked off the night lamp.

“Yeah,” he said quietly in the darkness. “I hope so too.”

He made his way out of the room and closed the door as silently as he could. It’d be a shame if the girl woke up after all his efforts to put her to sleep.

“I gather she’s asleep?”

Despite himself, he jumped. The hallway was unlit, just like the kitchen cum dining room it led to. Hearing a sudden voice in the darkness would fuck with anybody.

“Gosh dang it, Erza!” he exclaimed in a whisper, hand over his chest in an effort to stop his heart from leaving his ribcage. “What in the frick frack snick snack are you doing sitting in the dark?”

“Firstly, hearing the Great Demon Overlord censor his language never gets old.” He heard a chuckle and glared into the darkness.

“That’s only because you told me to watch my ‘barbaric, demon tongue’ around our daughter!”

“And secondly, I’m having tea.”

“In the dark?”

“Electricity is expensive in Tokyo.”

That, he knew. Though he had a small fan in his own apartment, Lyon suggested they use hand-fans during the day and only turn on the fan to sleep at night. They wouldn’t need it during winter, anyway.

Having pinpointed her location, he walked carefully to the table. Activating his demonic night vision would expend magical resources he couldn’t really afford to waste. She sensed his approach for she asked, ”Is Violet asleep?”

“Yeap.” He pulled out a chair and sat across from her. “I gotta say, I wasn’t expecting to get a call from a frantic you, begging me to-”

“I did not beg.”

“Begging,” he repeated and was rewarded when he heard her click her tongue. “Me to come over and put Violet to sleep. The Great Hero Erza Scarlet, Bane of the Demonic Army, conquered by a five-year-old! Ah, how the mighty have fallen!”

“Shut up,” Erza snapped. He imagined her huffing and snickered. “You may be absolutely horrible and beyond all hope of redemption, but you are good at some things.”

“High praise. You goin’ soft?”

A chuckle. “Hardly. I am simply being practical. Anyone could see that you are a great father.” The disdain in her voice was palpable and he grinned. Then she softly said, “And Violet needs you. No matter what I think of the matter.”

He said nothing for a while. The silence continued until he heard her slurp her tea.

“That may be true, but don’t think for a second that she doesn’t need you or you’re a bad mom.”

Judging from the sharp intake of breath across him in the darkness, he knew he’d hit the nail right on its head.

He continued, “Look, there are things only you can do. Okay? You are giving most of your time to her, and yet you’re handling your job and social life well. I think that’s awesome. You’re the one she sees when she wakes up and I can sleep well at night knowing you’ll be the best influence on her.” He shrugged. “Me, I just take her out to amusement parks and stuff. I can’t do what you do. Maybe if you’d let me bring her over-”

“There is no way I am letting my daughter sleep in a one-room flat inhabited by three bums. You’re lucky I even let you breathe the same air as her.”

The snark was back in her voice. She’d be okay. He smirked.

“I’ll have you know that Lyon’s turned it into an amazing bachelor pad. Be jealous.”

“Yeah, right.” There was a smile in the way she said it. He nodded to himself. “Say, Overl-”

“I. Have. A. Name.”

“Just so you know, I’m rolling my eyes at you.”

“I hope they fall right outta your face.”

“Fine, fine. Gray, then.” A pause. Then she hesitantly asked, “How do you put her sleep?”

He wanted to turn on the lights just to smirk victoriously at her but thought better of it. It was best not to screw around with Erza when she was having a self-doubt episode.

“It depends. Tonight I just told her a story.”

“A story, huh? What about?”

Humming, he said, ”Oh, the conquering of Ente Isla by the Demonic Hordes.”

A sharp clang rang out as the cup was placed on the saucer with much force. Fingers shot out of the darkness and curled into the collar of his shirt. Gray experienced being jerked around like he’d never been jerked around before. It made it harder to concentrate on Erza’s hissed words.

“You did what?! Are you trying to sell my daughter Demonic propaganda to win her over to your side?! Oh my God, you’re trying to take her away.”

“Dude, calm down,” he forced out, grabbing her wrists and trying to free himself. “It’s not like that!”

The jerking around stopped. “I shall give you half a minute to explain yourself.”

So he did. “It was just a story, jeez. It was about a Hero defeating the Devil.”

“You expect me to believe that?”

“Wake her up and ask her.”

She let go of him. “I’ll ask her in the morning. If I get any indication that you lied to me, I will summon my sword and skewer you right then and there. I don’t even care if I can’t get back afterwards.”

 “Yeah, but then you’d hafta clean up all the blood, which is mighty hard to do. You have no bleach, last I checked. Bloodstains really tank resale value too.” He shrugged. “Besides, if I bleed, my personality will leak out.”

She huffed. “What personality?”

“Excuse you.” Gray leant back against the chair. “You really have a dim opinion of me, don’t you?”

“I wonder whose fault that is.”

“Touché.” He closed his eyes and sighed, facing the ceiling. “I won’t do anything of the sort to her. Of that, I give you my word.”

“That means about as much to me as used sanitary napkin.”

Gray barked out a laugh. “Nice one. But yeah, I wouldn’t worry. D’you know what she told me when I told her that the Devil escaped to another world?”

“I do not. Unlike you, I don’t make a habit of eavesdropping.”

“Hey, man, that was just one time, okay? I hadta know what that Sariel guy’s sales pitch was!”

“I remain unimpressed. You were saying?”

“Oh right.” He hummed. “She said that she wishes that the Hero kills the Devil one day.”

Silence. Gray was interested to see how she would take that. When she responded, Erza didn’t disappoint.

“I’m glad she knows her priorities,” she said, sipping her tea.

Gray chuckled. I’m glad she does, too. He rose to his feet. “Well, I’m off.”

“You’re leaving?”

“Yeah. Lyon will start crying if I don’t show up soon.” He sighed as he went to the front door and slipped on his shoes. He knew her apartment well enough by now to navigate flawlessly in the dark.

Erza didn’t get up from her chair. “Let the door hit you on your way out.”

“G’night to you too,” he replied as he stepped outside and closed the door behind him. Gray pocketed his hands and walked up to the edge of the balcony to look out at the city sprawled out before him. Erza’s apartment was on the fifth floor of the complex, so it afforded a good view.

It reminded him of home, somehow, this weird place inhabited by humans. It was a different battle they faced, the people of Earth, but it was a battle nevertheless. He smiled to himself and headed for the stairs.

He was halfway down the first flight when he heard a door being thrown open. Moments later, he heard footsteps rushing towards the staircase. He stopped on the landing when he heard Erza’s voice.

“Gray! You forgot your damn umbrella - kyaahhh!”

He saw her round the bend, umbrella in hand, and in typical Erza fashion, she slipped on the stairs on her way down.

Gray was already expecting this. She always fell down the damn stairs everywhere. He’d already made his way up the stairs by the time she slipped, so he had no problem in catching her. It was hard not to, for as soon as she’d seen him, Erza had aimed for him. Perhaps he was just used to catching her. Perhaps she was used to it, too. It was just something they did.

Except this time, she had her arms around his neck and her face burrowed in his throat while he had his arms around her waist.

“When will you learn to use the fuckin’ stairs?” he breathed into her hair. Even her shampoo smelled of strawberries. Thank goodness I didn’t get slapped by her braid.

“-again,” she said in response.

“Don’t just keep going like nothing happened!”

“Sh-shut up!” She looked up at him, a blush spreading across her face. “It’s not like I wanted to fall into your arms or something, you idiot!”

For the first time that evening, Gray had a good look at her. He’d rushed to rescue her from Violet and had spent most of his time with the girl. Then they’d talked in the darkness to save electricity, but now that wasn’t the case.

She was beautiful, he couldn’t deny that. Her flustered and embarrassed face just made her look adorable, all red like that. Her deep brown eyes were sharper than usual in contrast, filled with the intent to seriously maim, if not kill. He chuckled.

“No, I suppose you wouldn’t.”

 “You’re an ass.”

“I’m an ass at the top of my class.”

She started to wiggle out of their awkward embrace and he let go. Erza handed him the umbrella. “Here. Don’t just leave it randomly somewhere.”

“Don’t worry. I’ll look after your gift.”

“It was not a gift! I was paying back a debt!”

He grinned and turned to leave. “Whatever you say.”

“Gray?”

He stopped. “Hmm?”

“What did you say when Violet said… y’know.”

Ah, yes. “I said I hoped the Hero got the Devil, too.”

“Why?”

Looking over his shoulder at her, Gray was somewhat surprised to see her glaring at him. She appeared… displeased. He blinked. “I thought that was what you wanted?”

“Yes, but, it’s not what you want!”

“Shows what you know.”

“You want to die?”

Gray sighed and turned to face her. “Since when do you care about what I want?”

“Why are you answering a question with another question?”

“Well, why shouldn’t I?”

“Ugh. I give up.” Erza pinched her eyebrows in frustration. ”I don’t know why you’re being so evasive, but it’s suspicious.”

“I’m the Devil. It’s kinda my job to be suspicious.”

“I hate you.”

Gray chuckled as he turned to leave, twirling the umbrella in his hand. “Don’t let the stairs get you on your way back.”

“Shut up. It gets really tiring, being saved all the time by you.”

He smiled to himself. “I’m the same way.”