#I think he's gonna stop flying to countries now and start running across oceans

[lewishamiltonstuff]

Lewis Hamilton wherever he goes: 🏃🏾

[straydawg-writing]

𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐞𝐞'𝐬 𝐚 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐦.

- 𝓚. 𝙯𝙤𝙡𝙙𝙮𝙘𝙠

• hunter x hunter series

⋯✰⋯

Chapter 2–

You knew that if anyone outside of this car saw you right now, you might just pass away. To put it simply: You were sitting on Killua's lap.

All because Kite's truck only fit seven people.

The way this predicament came about would have been comical if it weren't for your burning embarrassment. Unfortunately, you could remember very clearly how it all unfolded:

"Hmm, it seems that there aren't enough seats for all eight of us, so one person will have to squish in," Kite said, opening the car door to check the seats.

"Who's the smallest one here?" Gon asked. All seven pairs of eyes turned to look at you.

Great. The benefits of never having had your growth spurt.

Killua was the one to open his mouth, snickering, "Obviously it's Y/N. She's like a midget!"

"Killua, you are literally an entire 2 ½ feet shorter than Kite over there," you defended yourself.

From a distance, you had guessed Kite was around 6'3. Once you got a closer look at him, you discovered that he towered over you like a skyscraper. Your curiosity got the best of you and naturally, you had asked him what his height was. The man was a whopping 7 foot 10.

"It's okay Y/N, you can squish with me," Gon offered.

Killua shook his head. "No way. Squishing will just make everyone uncomfortable. It's better if only one person suffers. Y/N, you can sit on my lap."

He had left no room for argument. Sighing, you knew that even if you tried, you had no say in this anymore. You would just have to suck it up for the next 4 hours.

Now you were here, sitting on him, worrying about whether you were cutting the circulation off to his legs or not. Or perhaps you were too bony and it was hurting him.

You could feel his warm breath on your neck, and it sent goosebumps across your entire body. This was beyond awkward.

"Stop it," Killua muttered, right in your ear.

Oh, you'd done it now, hadn't you? Killua was gonna push you off onto Gon instead.

"Stop what?"

"You're so stiff, just...relax," he paused, "I don't mind sitting this way."

Hearing his voice so close to you sent butterflies fluttering in your stomach.

Maybe this was okay.

You untensed, trying to adjust yourself to a more comfortable position, but the bumpy car ride wasn't making it very easy. Kite ran over a rock, and without a seatbelt it sent you jerking upwards. Thanks to his fast reflexes, Killua gripped your waist, holding you tightly to his body.

"The seatbelt won't reach over the both of us, but this'll keep you from flying."

"Heh, thanks Killua. I think we should reach the beach in a bit..." you said, hoping that the thought of it being over soon might offer him some relief.

It doesn't matter who it is, being this close to someone could send anyone into a frenzy. You were hyper-aware of every one of his fingers grasping onto your waist. He wasn't lying. He was keeping you right there.

You'd just have to stop thinking about it, you told yourself. Or else you'd go crazy.

Trying to relax back into Killua like he had asked, you let your mind wander to the reason you were driving in the first place. The day before, the three of you had decided to stick with Kite and help him investigate the Chimera ants. The beach you were headed to now is supposed to have a clue about where the ant queen is located, so you could bring an end to the destruction before it starts. During the car ride, you had learned they were a truly deadly species. One bite of an innocent passerby, and they had the means to bring the entire human race to extinction.

You felt like something was starting. And your intuition was rarely wrong.

Gazing at Gon who had been talking with Kite for a while now, you noticed how his eyes crinkle into little smiles whenever he talks. You knew that having Kite around, his father's best friend, surely excited him to the bone. Gon was just oozing with optimism, without even trying. You could tell that just by being himself, he was keeping the spirits up of all eight in the group, not allowing any room for doubt or fear to creep into anyone's minds.

At that moment, you swore that whatever happened, you would be there to protect Gon and Killua. Even if it costs you everything.

Hopefully, this wasn't one of your friends' last few moments of tranquility. But if it was, you were determined to spend it well.

Resting your head against Killua, you hoped that he wouldn't mind if you indulged in this for just a moment. You were tired, having not gotten much rest since completing Greed Island and meeting Kite.

It didn't take much time for you to fall asleep to the rise and fall of Killua's steady breathing and his sweet vanilla scent. If you'd been awake, you might have even heard his heartbeat racing beneath you.

⋯✰⋯

You had finally reached the beach.

Killua had nudged you awake once you'd gotten there. You remembered how his blue eyes stared back at you as he poked your face, calling you an idiot for falling asleep, and you chuckled.

There was one thing you were clueless about; Killua had made sure not to move even once the whole rest of the car ride. He was nervous that he might disturb your peacefully sleeping form.

You were still pretty groggy as you looked out at the sea, the bright sun reflecting on the ocean's surface. You wanted to wiggle your toes in the sand, but you were there for a reason. To find anything that might lead to the Queen.

You searched in bushes, behind rocks, under seashells, and even used your nen to sift through as much sand as you could. So far, the group had ruled out the forest and deemed it difficult to know if the ant even ended up on the same island. That's when they decided to release the hellhound. Well- it wasn't a hellhound. It was the little dog you played with yesterday. Along with Gon.

Gon was following behind the dog on all floors, sniffing the ground as he went.

"He can do that?" You asked no one in particular.

"His nose is as sharp as a dog's," Killua responded, watching Gon with an amused look in his eye.

A couple minutes went by with no luck. The only thing the dog had found was a tree to pee on. It looked like the ant wasn't going to be on this island, though Kite had an idea.

"It may have washed ashore somewhere else. Which direction do the currents flow here?" Kite asked the two that had brought us down to the beach. One was short with brown skin and grey hair that sprouted up like hay, while the other had large glasses and two front teeth poking out from his mouth.

"The direction is reversed between day and night. And it also changes with the seasons. I've even heard it's different on certain days. So it'll be tough to pinpoint a location..." said Chipmunk Teeth. That's what you'd call him, since you hadn't gotten his name.

So basically, no one had any idea on how to find the Chimera Ant Queen.

"Continuing to search blindly is pointless. We should return to YorkNew and see if we can find any new leads there."

You heard the group around you agreeing with Kite. He and his friends began walking back to the truck already, but you stayed put. You would catch up to them later.

The ocean reminded you of your home. You thought you should say goodbye to it first.

Ripples of water lapped gently at your feet. You always had a connection with nature. Having lived in a small village located in the middle of a jungle most of your life, the earth had become your dearest friend. One of your earliest memories was from exploring the coves back at home. You stretched out your arm across the water, and watched the liquid softly rise to your hand as you called it.

That's why you chose this nen ability. It tied you to the elements. When you fought with it, together you were one body.

"Y/N, come on! Kite's threatening to leave without you," Gon waved you over. Taking one last look at the sea, you turned away.

The sun was already setting by the time you left for the city.

⋯✰⋯

Going back to YorkNew was the right decision. Now you all knew where to look.

Kite had discovered that the possibilities of the Chimera Ant landing in NGL were the highest. Apparently, NGL was a country populated with people who wanted to get away from machine civilization and live in nature.

You loved nature too, but you thought that was a little extreme. There was a reason you had to leave your beloved jungle behind.

"There may very well be a giant swarm of Chimera Ants already hunting humans down. If that's the case, my top priority will be saving them. You must be able to protect yourselves," Kite warned us.

"And if I am the one in trouble, you should escape without me."

At that, Gon and Killua looked unsettled. But backing down now was not an option.

"Got it," you said, breaking the silence and offering a kind nod to Kite, "and until the very last moment, the three of us will have your back."

"Yeah!" The other two boys concurred.

Now, you sat with Gon and Killua on an airship to NGL. The three of you were sitting on a bench, looking out of a window that framed velvet-peach clouds displaying brilliant silver linings.

Gon was reflecting on their last conversation with Kite.

"You said that Ging had a reason for bringing me and Kite together," he rested his arms and head on the window-frame.

Killua broke his sight from the clouds and looked at Gon.

"Yeah, I did."

"You're probably right. I don't know the reason, but I can't give up halfway, no matter what's going on. Otherwise, I'll disappoint Ging... And I'd never be able to forgive myself either. So I won't run away," Gon continued, resolved with his decision.

There was a moment of silence as the three of you let his words sink in.

You admired Gon's determination, but you hated that Ging had a son risking his life just to avoid disappointing a dad he's never met.

"Man, you had this totally serious expression, so I was expecting something big. But it's just business as usual," Killua smiled.

"Huh?" Gon's mouth hung open. "I thought about this a lot, I even ran a bunch of mental simulations! And I liked what Y/N said earlier, about having Kite's back until the very end."

"Think all you want, but you'll still be Gon. If someone said to abandon them, you'd never do it," You lightly punched his shoulder.

He pouted, cradling where you hit him, and you rolled your eyes.

"Drama queen."

Gon chose to ignore that and turned back to Killua. "Then what would you do?'"

"I'm a spontaneous guy, so I'd think about it once the time comes."

"So, you'd run away?" Gon questioned.

"Depends. I can't say until it actually happens."

"Say for instance..."

Killua threw his hands up, beat, "I can't tell you what I'd do in a hypothetical situation!"

"Then, what about you Y/N?"

"Gon!" You whined.

Truth be told, you hadn't thought about what you would do. It depended like Killua said. But you did know one thing...

"I would never leave you two behind. Even if that meant I'd have to die."

⋯✰⋯

[petri808]

@fuck-yeah-nalu Naluween week 2020 Apocalypse prompt

Lucy POV

The further I run, the softer the screams become, dying away into garbled choking and haunting ripping sounds as the zombies tear away at the flesh of their hapless victims. I wipe away the tears that cloud my vision, don’t look back Lucy, I cry a mantra in my head, don’t look back and see your family... it’s too painful to know you are the only one who made it out alive. I can only be grateful that my mother never lived to see this day or become one of the undead. Oh god, please don’t tell me corpses will reanimate too! I shake the thoughts away. Don’t you do that!

How did this happen? I have no idea what is going on because it came on so suddenly. A plague that washed across our town, the state, is the world like this? Where do I go? Is there anywhere safe? Is there anyone I know that’s still alive? I call these creatures zombies because it’s like a horror movie come to life! I saw with my own two eyes a servant killed by one of the creatures, literally her throat ripped out and blood spurting everywhere, suddenly come back to life! Then they both went after our butler...

It was only by the grace of skill that I escaped with my life. Years of running track and a conditioned body allowed me to out pace these ravenous beings. They weren’t slow nor fast, yet deadly focused on their unquenchable hunger. Is that all we have left for our futures? Whether today or 60 years from now to turn the moment I die into a zombie? I have no idea. Is it just in the bite? Was it an airborn virus unleashed into the world? Has Mother Nature forsaken us? And can we blame her for it?

All the sounds of carnage have ceased and I’m left to my own thoughts as I walk the back roads from our country estate. I have no clear direction except to avoid areas of population. It was a good thing that we lived outside of the city itself where there are less people. The heart of town must be crawling with zombies by now. Yet distant gun fire or explosions, and occasional screams remind me to stay focused at least until I find somewhere safe to hold up in.

I hear a car approaching from behind and turn to look. As it gets closer, the vehicle looks awfully familiar... It grinds to halt a few feet before reaching me and I hear the best sound I’ve heard all day!

“Lucy!”

“Natsu!”

I run to his open trucks door and launch myself into his arms. “You’re alive!” The tears stream down my cheeks as I bury my face into his chest.

“I’m so glad I found you baby! I went past your house looking for you, but it was over run.”

“Everyone’s gone!” My sobs increase. Dead or undead, no longer the people I cared about.

“At least we’ve got each other.”

“But... your family?”

“Gone too,” he grits out.

His voice tells me he’s trying to hold himself together for my sake. “I’m so sorry Natsu.”

“Can’t be helped at this point. Come on,” he ushers me, “let’s get out of here.”

I jump into his truck and we take off again. “But where do we go?”

“No idea. Right now my main concern is doing what ever I need to keep us alive.”

Ever wished you’d watched more horror movies when you had the chance? Before today, it’s not something I would have ever considered. But it sure would be handy! As Natsu drove, different scenarios ran through my mind. Would this be like a 28 Days Later type zombie that eventually starves? Or more like a classic George Romero, never dies type, that finally stops because their body has completely rotted away? But let’s just hope it’s not a Resident Evil plot line with mutant zombies and a corporation behind the whole thing. Government... maybe... The current President does have a screw loose. Anyways, I guess the cause could be irrelevant at this point. We needed to figure out ways to survive this, however long it would last.

What are the common ideas in the movies? Find a secure building, preferably easy access for scavenging food and water. Avoidance as much as possible... Oh! And weapons! Guns, ammo, a big knife. Hmm, tactical clothing, comfortable and durable. But wait?! What if the outbreak came from contaminated food?! Ugh! This is so frustrating!

“Do you still have your cellphone Natsu? I wasn’t able to grab mine.”

“I do. Sent out a group text but so far no one’s answered.”

“At least that’s still working... for now.”

We drive and drive searching for supplies if we’re lucky enough to come across them. Gasoline, food, water, weapons, clothes, and bedding. Natsu’s truck is a blessing to have in times like this to use less travelled dirt roads or even no roads at all. These zombies are everywhere! How did it spread so quickly?

I use his phone to Google what’s happening and sure enough this pandemic is sweeping across the Americas but has not yet jumped across the oceans. The world’s response was to immediately shut down borders. Planes were turned around and grounded and ports grind to a halt. Military vessels from Asia and Europe were on their way to create blockades to stop boats from leaving either American continent, and fighter jets in the sky ordered to shoot down any planes...

“Oh my god...” my hands fly up and cover my mouth. “Natsu were trapped.” The world has turned its back on us. “This really is an apocalypse for our country.”

So many theories and stories about the cause of this infection fly around the internet. Best anyone can tell it started somewhere near Maryland and quickly moved across state lines. Several articles mention a government research hospital called Walter Reed as a possible link. We’re they working on something that caused this outbreak? Why doesn’t this surprise me?

“Why? What are you reading Luce?”

“In order to keep the pandemic from jumping continents, the world is basically cutting us off. I mean I can’t blame them, but what about survivors? Is no one gonna help us to escape?”

Damn! It could be like the 28 Weeks Later scenario! Are they going to bomb us, try to eradicate us! Oh look, at least the President is confirmed dead. That useless fat bastard was a plague of his own on this country.

Ping.

“Omg Natsu, Gray answered! He said he and Juvia made it out of the city, as well as Erza, Jellal, Levy, and Gajeel too! Right now they’re holding up at an abandoned warehouse in Clover. Natsu that’s the next town from here!”

“Should we go?”

“I think so, there’s safety in small groups.”

Natsu takes my hand and kisses the back of it. “Then we have a plan.”

What the future will hold is still to be seen. Will we survive it? You know what? I shut off Google and realize no one else is going to protect us but ourselves. We have to work together if we hope to live another day, but at least we have each other and our friends.

I smile back, he was right. “We have a plan!”

[smolthealmighty]

Spinaraki Week Level 2 Day 1: Chase

Give Myself To You

When Spinner had the idea to visit his hometown and show off his old hideaways to Tomura, he thought it would be romantic. He could turn these sad places where he went to cry into secluded havens where he could spend some quality alone time with the love of his life, and do something he's wanted to do since their third date. He was not expecting a neon orange pickup truck to interrupt the date by hurtling towards them at high speed.

In which Spinner's old bullies want to run him over with their truck, Tomura wants to beat the shit out of them for daring to try, and Spinner just wants to pop the question.

~~~~~

This was not how this date was supposed go. Spinner just wanted to show his boyfriend around his hometown, give him a tour of all the isolated spots he would hide away in before he eventually shut himself up inside the Iguchi house. It was gonna be a nice romantic getaway, where the places he associated with some of his worst memories could be re-contextualized as he turned them into secluded little havens where he could woo his boyfriend –and eventually propose to him– in peace.

There they were, sitting together at the edge of the forest that semi-surrounded the town, watching the sun start to set over the hilly meadow that lay below them. Tomura was fully relaxed for once, leaning heavily on his boyfriend as he reminisced about the utter disaster that was the one time they tried to go clubbing, while Spinner was mustering up his courage and fidgeting with the rings in his jacket’s pocket. Just as he turned to face Tomura and was about to start the speech he had been revising in his mind since –admittedly– their third date, he saw the unmistakable neon orange pickup truck that belonged to Spinner’s worst nightmares, Nōtarin, Iyaga, and Rase, speeding in the background. And the truck was gunning straight for them!

“Oh no.”

“Hm, what do you mean ‘oh no’?” asked Tomura, who also uttered an “oh no” once Spinner pointed towards the truck that was now only a hundred meters away. With reflexes that were still etched into his bones after years of dealing with the trio, Spinner clutched his boyfriend close and launched the both of them down the hill in a barrel roll, barely missing the thick tires of the truck as it blew past them.

“What the hell was that shit?” yelled Tomura, as Spinner shot up, grabbed his hand, and lead them towards one of the few trees that dotted the meadow.

“Those are the assholes I told you about, the ones who always went after me. One of them must’ve seen me and recognized me, and now they’re picking back up from where we last left off!”

“You last left off with them trying to turn you into roadkill?!”

As they ducked into the hollow, a chorus of brash voices with heavy country accents boomed across the meadow.

“Shuichi, you purse designer’s wet dream! Why don’t you let us mount your lizard head to the wall like the hunting trophy you are!”

“Nōtarin, I saw someone with him, hey gecko geek, do you mind if we mount your friend too?”

“Damn Iyaga, keep it in your pants. Though to be fair, compared to talon-hands you’d probably be a better fit!”

At this point Tomura was already struggling against Spinner to march out of the hollow and wreak vengeance. “C’mon Spinner, I’ll mount their heads on our base’s wall!”

“Would you just gimme a sec to cool down a bit?!” Tomura relented and stopped squirming, letting Spinner hold him as he tried to stop trembling.

“Ugh, I swear, they always know how to get under my skin. And I really thought I’d be over them by now.”

Tomura turned to face Spinner and squeezed him back, taking his boyfriend’s scaly beak and pressing it into his scarred neck. “You’ll be alright. You’re just a little stuck, I’m right here if you need a push you know.”

Spinner sighed as he nuzzled the curve of Tomura’s shoulder. “I know I’m not the pinnacle of dating material but damn, people can have different tastes.”

Tomura snorted, “Oh please, as if those hillbilly bitches know anything about ‘good taste’. If your loyalty and empathy for empty husks like me aren’t enough to prove ‘em wrong, then you having the muscles to be able to wield a giant ‘fuck you’ sword should’ve done the job. The fact they can’t see any of that just shows that their IQ scores are all in the negatives.”

Looking up and seeing Tomura’s self-assured smile, the smile graced his face whenever he was so sure that he was right, knowing that he truly believed that his boyfriend was really all that, melted Spinner’s heart into a puddle of goo.

“Marry me.”

Maybe melted it a little too much.

“Huh?”

Realizing what just came out of his mouth, Spinner blushed violently and tried to start some damage control. “Uh shoot I mean um-”

“Hey Nōtarin, let’s ram into that tree! I think I hear them over there!”

Hearing that brought Spinner back to his senses, and he dragged Tomura out of the hollow, Nōtarin swerving just enough to only nick one of the headlights off the truck before resuming the chase.

“Son of a bitch, I had it all planned out and I messed it up!”

“Had what planned out?” asked Tomura, still in a whirl from what he was pretty sure he heard Spinner blurt just seconds ago.

“You know what, it’s fine, I’ll just do it on the fly. Follow me!”

They booked it across the meadow, Spinner weaving them around the hidden hills and valleys camouflaged beneath the waist-high grass. The truck kept slowly gaining on them, but the constant bangs and thumps of the truck bouncing against the uneven ground and the arguing between the driver and his passengers betrayed how little the tormentors knew about the terrain.

“Dammit, stay still you lizard-fuck!”

“Nah, let him keep running. Makes the chase more exciting!”

“Maybe if you’d gotten your driver’s license, you’d actually be able to hit him Nōtarin!”

“Fuck off Rase!”

Jumping over a particularly thick mud puddle, Spinner finally began the speech that had been previously interrupted.

“I’m sure you already know that I fell for you pretty fast-”

“Understatement of the year, but I’m not one to talk.”

The neon orange paint was splattered with mud, with the new coat of brown getting bigger as the wheels spun, sluggishly making its way through the puddle.

Spinner laughed breathlessly as he continued, “-yeah, and I don’t think I’ll ever be able put how much the love you gave me in return means to me into words. I couldn’t do it even if the ocean was made of ink and the earth was paper, it just wouldn’t be enough.”

“Shuichi…”

“And, well, since I can’t use words, I thought I’d show my devotion with some kind of gift, but I don’t really have much to give you except myself. Still, I’ll give that to you for the rest of my life if you want it.”

By this point they had stopped just a few feet in front of a moss-covered boulder, one that blended in with the green grass and was in the direct pathway of the truck that continued driving towards them at top speed.

Ignoring the oncoming truck, Spinner took Tomura’s other hand into his own, and softly asked, “Tomura, will you marry me?”

The truck hit the rock, skyrocketing up and over the couple. The screams of the driver and his passengers fell on deaf ears as Tomura gazed into bright, cherry-petal eyes and answered the proposal:

“You’re more than enough for me, you’re more than I could ever dream of asking for. Of course I’ll marry you.”

Not even a moment after he accepted, a loud crash echoed across the meadow as the truck collided with the ground, flipping over as it did so. The bullies were quick to exit the wreck and make their way towards the still lovestruck duo to attack them. It was a farce from the start, the newly established fiancés barely paying them any attention as they began to brawl.

“Look at you all smiley and shit,” said Tomura as he kicked Rase across the field.

“Why wouldn’t I be all smiles? I’m gonna get to marry to the love of my life! You should see your face right now, looks like your smile’s gonna split your face in two with how big it is!” exclaimed Spinner, dodging Nōtarin’s sluggish punches with ease.

“Touché, fiancé. I bet you’ve already got a plan for everything that comes next, you gooey romantic.”

“Well, I was thinking we could have a small ceremony, just us and the league. Nothing too fancy, we’d just do the vows, ring exchange, ‘I do’s’, and sealing it with a kiss, all within fifteen minutes tops. That way we can splurge on the reception, the best music-” Nōtarin screamed as his arm was sliced by Spinner’s hunting knife.

“-the most delicious food and drinks-” Nōtarin gurgled as the knife ran through his neck.

“-and a cake so big that’ll make everyone sick. We’d just have to grab someone to officiate the thing and make it official.”

“We can get Giran to do it, he’s got just enough connections that he could make it happen.” Iyaga howled as his chest caved in.

“And for the honeymoon, I was thinking about taking a joyride on the coastline. We could stock up the van and make stops at all the beaches, and maybe get rid of a few heroes along the way if we’re up for it.”

“That sounds good to me, I’m certainly looking forward to having some fun alone time to ourselves!” Tomura cried happily, as Rase joined Iyaga in the pile of dust that lay at his feet.

~

By the time they came down from the high of the fight, the sun was dipping below the tree line, Tomura and Spinner sprawled out next to each other on the bloodstained earth.

“Ah shit,” said Tomura, “I just realized that there goes my future date idea of murdering your hometown bullies.”

Spinner chuckled at his fiancé’s annoyed tone, “That’s okay, we only murdered a couple of them. Next time we can take down the town leaders who encouraged everything, make a day out of it.”

“Hmm, alright, but I’m planning it. It’s only fair.”

Satisfied, Spinner let out a sigh before suddenly sitting up. “Oh right, I gotcha these,” he said as he pulled the rings out of his pocket.

“It’s just a pair of those plastic rings from the arcade we went to a while back, but I figure we’re not gonna wear these for too long because they’re just engagement rings. We can rob a jewelry store together to pick out the wedding rings.”

“Sounds perfect,” said Tomura, as they each took turns slipping the rings onto each other’s fingers. Taking a second to let the presence of a ring on his finger sink in, Tomura smiled and said, “I don’t think I’ve ever been more grateful that Re-Destro only snapped off my first three fingers.”

“Well, that’s one way to say you’re happy to be engaged,” Spinner joked.

“Hm. Then I’ll say it more romantically, just for you.” This time, it was Tomura who took Spinner’s hands into his own as he spoke his piece:

“Shuichi, you are one thing in this world that I could never hate, and the only person I will ever promise myself to. I’ll do whatever it takes to give you the life you want to live. I love you, and I’ll continue to love you until the stars grow cold, and even after that.”

If that speech hadn’t already swept Spinner off his feet, then the deep kiss Tomura initiated sent his heart skyward with how much it fluttered. When they both came down to earth, they went about flipping the thoroughly beat-up truck right side up, and as the last rays of sunlight disappeared beneath the horizon, the newly engaged couple drove off into the ink and lavender sky.

[ugly-crying-over-bucky-barnes]

Blue Eyes Epilogue

Summary: After the Garrison is shot up, the youngest Shelby daughter finds a new home in London. She strips herself of her last name and tries to live a peaceful life far away from her brothers’ chaos in Birmingham. But fate leads her right back into it after she runs into Alfie Solomons.

          “Alf?”

           “You alright, love? I heard you getting a bit heated over the phone.” Alfie was at the sink, gently washing the sand off Ezra’s feet. Father and son had been out on the beach that morning watching the waves and the sea birds overhead.

           “I was on the phone with Tommy.” Ella set Sofia down so she could go to Alfie.

           “I figured that much.” He replied sympathetically.

           She walked around to stand by the sink. Ezra gave her a gummy smile, squirming a bit because of the cold water on his toes. Ella grabbed a towel to give to Alfie so he could dry Ezra off. “I just don’t know what to think anymore.”

           “About what, love?” He asked, shutting off the sink and taking the towel from his wife.

           “Just…everything. Tommy was going on and on about how things used to be. I mean-I understand where he’s coming from. He spent all that time looking toward the future, looking at what he could have instead of appreciating what he did have. Now he regrets it because look at everything that’s happened. We’ve lost so many people. But…I like what I have now. I can’t look to the past anymore.”

           “I hate to say it, but your brother’s gone and dug his own grave, hasn’t he? He wanted power and this is what it gave him. The man doesn’t know when to quit.” Alfie wiped off Ezra’s feet even though the toddler gave him a bit of a hard time, kicking his legs and giggling like mad.

           “But we know when to step away, right?” Ella asked quietly.

           Alfie set Ezra down so he could dry his hands off. “What’s the matter, love? Talk to me.”

           Ella wrapped her arms around herself, thoroughly shaken by the world around her. When once she had been so fearless, she was becoming aware of how chaotic things could become. “I’m scared that we’re going to lose everything we’ve worked for.”

           “We’re not gonna lose anything. What are you afraid of losing?” Alfie wasn’t looking to ridicule his wife, he saw the fear in her eyes, and in turn, it worried him. One of his primary jobs was to comfort her.

           “I’m afraid of losing you, I’m afraid of losing the twins, I-I’m afraid of losing my sanity, Alfie.” Her voice broke. “I never expected any of this to happen. Th-this has all gone too far and I can’t take it anymore.”

           “It’s alright love.” He embraced her, pulling her to his chest.

           “It’s not alright, Alfie. I’m not going to give you up because of the things Tommy does. But there are things in this world that I can’t stop.”

           Alfie was starting to pick up on the root of her worry. After all, Mosley was just one man. They could deal with individuals, gangs even. But when there was some sort of movement, with an unknown amount of people following? Well, they couldn’t exactly fight off the world, could they? Even if Tommy Shelby liked to think he could. “The world we’re living in, s’not ideal, is it? But there are more people who are willing to fight this than are willing to stay quiet.”

           “How do you know that?” She asked.

           “Because I fought in a bloody war for the sake of this country.” He reminded her. “I don’t doubt that we’d do it again if we’re threatened again.”

           “But they’re here, Alfie. There are people in Britain who would rather see you hung than fight for you.”

           There were things that Alfie could brush off. He could brush off her brother’s disdain for him. He could brush off the slurs that Darby was so fond of calling him. He could even brush off that he was shot in the eye. But he couldn’t brush off his wife’s concern for him. “What would you suggest we do then, love?” He asked softly, gently petting her hair.

           “I think we should just go somewhere else.” She whispered. “We can go to America, we can put this behind us.”

           “There are fascists in America, El. There ain’t a place on this Earth that’s pure.” He told her truthfully. “America might be further away, but it ain’t much different.”

           Ella couldn’t argue with that. She knew that it didn’t matter how far she went. It didn’t matter if she changed her last name from Shelby. She would always be involved in Tommy’s game. It was her birthright. Something would always bring her back.

           “Mumma.”

           Ella drew away from Alfie so she could scoop Ezra up. “I won’t lose them.” She whispered. It had been painful enough to lose her twins before they were even born. But to lose Ezra and Sofia after she had bonded with them? Ella knew she would never be able to come back from that.

           Alfie nodded. “Well, we’ve got more than enough money to retire. We can sell the bakery, sell the flat in Camden. We can stay here for the rest of our lives.”  

           “I’m scared.”

           “I know. It’s a scary world, but you know we can make it work. It’ll be alright. I promise.”

~~~~~~~~~~

           For the next few years, Ella lived her life very removed from her family. That wasn’t to say she never saw them. She made a habit to keep in touch but wouldn’t involve herself in any business matters. She was vocal about Tommy’s mental state but there wasn’t anything anyone could do. It was all in his hands. And he continued on as the soldier he was.

           Lizzie and Polly confided in Ella often, if only to make sure they weren’t going crazy because of Tommy’s behavior. But they also respected that Ella was raising her own family and had more than enough good reasons to keep her distance.

           For the most part, she and Alfie remained at Margate with the children. Retired and happy to be retired, Alfie was content staying by the ocean. They returned to Camden for special occasions or to see friends and family. But Ella felt much more comfortable at Margate. Going back to London was just another reminder of the trouble brewing. There was unrest, not just in the city, and not just in the country. It was across the continent and Ella felt like everyone was just holding their breath, waiting for the powder keg to explode again.

           Outside of the city, however, she felt much more removed from it all. She could truly enjoy her life as being a wife and mother. She had gained the peace she had always looked forward to.

           As the twins grew, their personalities started to blossom and it was such a lovely thing to see.

           Sofia was a rambunctious little girl who loved the outdoors. One of her favorite things was to trawl the shoreline with Alfie by her side so she could find little sea critters in tide pools. Or sometimes she’d crouch in the garden, hunting for bugs and earthworms. A day without getting her clothes stained with dirt or covered in sand was not a day well spent in Sofia’s eyes.

           Ezra was on the shyer side. He became very bashful when talking to people he didn’t know well and would cling to Ella when they were visiting others in Camden. But he was curious in his own way. Often times, he would have long discussions with his father, simply asking endless questions about how things worked. Where the sun went at night, how did clocks know the time, how did the record player work, why did Cyril have a tail and he didn’t, how come birds fly, how big is the moon. Any little thing would pique his curiosity and he would rush to Alfie for information.

           Trouble was, Alfie wasn’t too sure how to answer his questions most of the time. There were some things he could explain, but most of Ezra’s questions were beyond his expertise. It was a blessing, then, that Ezra learned to read at a very young age. He absorbed books like a sponge and it was hard to get him to stop reading and go to bed.

           Their differing personalities positively enchanted Ella. Despite how difficult motherhood was, she was so happy to take the journey. Every day, her children surprised her and gave her another reminder of how blessed she was.

           It was a difficult balance, trying to keep her children safe while still allowing them to have a relationship with their kin. It was easier to have them around the people from Camden. They grew up with the other children of Ella’s friends and came to know the people they would consider like aunts and uncles.

           But with Birmingham, Ella was very cautious. She understood how easy it was to be swept up into the Shelby Company Limited. Her cousin Michael was a great example. Although raised outside of the family, once he was back in, there was no going back. Ella refused to allow her children to be roped in. Perhaps she was being over-skeptical of her own family. But she was willing to be over-cautious rather than let her guard down.

           Still, she allowed her children to attend parties and holidays with the Shelby family. It was tense, at least in Ella’s shoes. She watched her brothers like a hawk whenever they were around the twins.

~~~~~~~~~~

           One bright summer afternoon, while celebrating Finn’s birthday at Arrow House, Tommy came over to his sister.

           She was sitting in the shade, watching her children play with their cousins on the lawn. Cyril and Anthea were running around with them, just as happy. Alfie was talking with Polly a bits away. The two had grown a well-formed relationship of respect. Polly liked that he had taken care of Ella all those years and Alfie appreciated Polly’s sanity.

           Tommy took a seat beside his sister and pulled out a cigarette. He coughed a bit as he lit it.

           “Y’know, some people are saying smoking is bad for you.” She said. “Maybe you should cut down.”

           “Lots of things in life are bad for you.” He replied and took a drag from the cigarette anyways.

           “Charlie looks so much like Grace now.” Ella did everything in her power to avoid arguments at family functions. She knew there was no point, nothing she could do would change anyone’s minds especially Tommy’s.

           Charlie was kicking a football back and forth with Karl, trying to keep the ball from Anthea. He was so grown from the little toddler that he once was. He was nearly a teenager, had grown like a weed, and indeed was nearly the spitting image of his mother.

           “He’s been asking about her,” Tommy told Ella. “He knows Lizzie isn’t his biological mother, so he’s been asking about Grace.”

           “What did you tell him?”

           “That we lost her before he was old enough to remember her. I gave him all the photographs I had of her. I don’t know what else to do.”

           “I don’t think there’s much else you can do.” Ella shrugged.

           The siblings went quiet for a moment. Tommy smoking and Ella watching the children play.

           “Do you trust me, El?” He asked out of nowhere.

           “Trust you?”

           “Yeah.”

           She glanced over at him to gauge whether he was trying to get a rise out of her or not. But he seemed genuinely interested in what she had to say. “Why are you asking that?”

           “Because it seems like anytime I’m near Ezra or Sofia, you’re looking at me like I’m about to kidnap them or feed ‘em to a lion.”

           She rolled her eyes. “Don’t even say that.”

           “So, you completely trust me, then? I’m just overthinking things, aye?” He challenged.

            Ella crossed her arms over her chest and shook her head. “I don’t want to have this conversation with you.”

           “You’re kin, Ella. They’re kin. Fuck it, even Alfie is kin by now. You really think I’m going to bring them harm?”

           “I trust that you want what’s best for everyone. I trust that all those years ago, you made a conscious decision to help this family. I trust that maybe you didn’t anticipate all of this, and if you had known maybe you never would’ve done any of it. I know you’re a good man, Tommy. I know the person you were growing up. I just…I wish you would quit this. I thought so many times that this would be the one thing that would make you stop. But every time, no matter what happened, you kept at it. I know that if you don’t stop, you’ll be killed. And if that’s something you accept then…there’s nothing else I can do.” She sighed heavily. “But I have to protect my children from that fate. I know you don’t want this for our kids. You said so many times that if we had children, they would never grow up the same way we did. We were supposed to be the ones to stop the cycle, Tom.”

           “I know.” He said in a rare tone of assent.

           “I’m scared,” Ella admitted, trying to keep her composure for the sake of the party. “I’m so fucking scared of everything in this world now, Tommy.”

           Tommy had always known his sister to be fearless. Now it seemed that motherhood had brought up new fears in her. Maybe because she knew what it was like to grow up poor in a dangerous neighborhood. She was familiar with guns before she even went to school. She’d seen death and violence at an early age. It was only a natural instinct to want better for her children. But it didn’t mean she had to have such a crippling fear of everything. “Things are gonna be alright, El.”

           “That’s what Alfie says, that’s what everyone says but I’m not blind!” She exclaimed. “I know that it’s only a matter of time ‘fore…”

           “Before what?” He asked gently.

           Ella shook her head. “It’s a cycle, Tommy, it’s always a cycle. Do you know what I prayed for every night while you and Arthur and John were in France?”

           Tommy could only imagine. She was so young back then. “I don’t-tell me.”

           “I prayed that you three would all come back home safe. And when you did, I prayed that you’d all find nice women and settle down. I prayed that you would all have good lives and be at peace. But then I saw you at the train station and I knew that would never happen. The things you saw over there, the things that happened…I know why you three changed, I get it. But I never anticipated what would happen after that.”

           “I know.”

           Ella looked down at her hands, almost too tired to continue going around in circles with him. Facts were facts and the past was the past. “Do you think we’re going to go to war?”

           Tommy nodded. “Yeah.”

           She swallowed and chewed on her lip. “And that doesn’t scare you?”

           What else could he say? His nightmares were growing more severe, the shovels were getting louder.

           “It terrifies me.”  

~~~~~~~~~~~

           After Finn’s birthday party, Ella felt a little more forgiving toward her family. Maybe if they understood her anxiety, she could trust them a bit more. She also knew that there was no use arguing with Tommy. Both of them understood what it felt like for their sanity to slowly trickle away. They understood what it felt to have the world on their shoulders. They were too alike to blame one another.

           One night, back in Margate, Ella was coming in from bringing Cyril and Anthea out. She shrugged off her coat and hung up the dog leashes. Anthea bolted to Ezra’s bedroom while Cyril hobbled down the hall. The bullmastiff was getting up in age but still had the same docile demeanor he had when she had met him for the first time in London as a pup.

           Ella gave the old dog a pat. “Good boy.” She said softly and followed him into Ezra’s room where Alfie was reading a bedtime story to the twins.

           “My armor is like tenfold…”

           “No, Smaug is still talking so you’ve gotta do the voice!” Ezra protested.

           Alfie chuckled. “Alright, alright.” He cleared his throat and began to rumble in a deep, menacing voice. “My armor is like tenfold shields, my teeth are swords, my claws spears, the shock of my tail is a thunderbolt, my wings a hurricane, and my breath…death!” He read from The Hobbit dramatically.

           Sofia and Ezra laughed, delighted by all the voices their father did for every book he read them. It was commonplace. Alfie always read to them even if he struggled with the strain on his one good eye and often got headaches.

           The eight-year-old twins were always insistent that he read to them, and Alfie wasn’t exactly complaining. He loved their rapt expressions as he read. Sofia often laid on the bed, petting Cyril or Anthea as she imagined the scene her father was describing. Ezra cuddled up close to Alfie in the crook of his arm so he could try and read along with his father. Sometimes he’d stop Alfie and point to a word he didn’t understand, asking for the definition.

           Sometimes, Ella would sit in just to spend those last few moments of the day with her family. But that night, it had grown too late.

           “It’s late, my loves.” She interrupted.

           Sofia looked up and pulled a pout. “Nooooo, mummy it’s not that late!”

           “It’s summer!” Ezra chimed in.

           “It is quite late.” Ella walked into the room.

           “Mum’s right.” Alfie dog-eared the page in the book and began to untangle himself from the children, Ezra on his arm and Sofia sprawled over his legs.

           “But dad hasn’t finished the chapter,” Ezra whined.

           “S’a long chapter, mate.” His father stood and helped him under the covers. “We’ll pick up on the rest of it tomorrow.” He promised. “Not much left of this book anyhow, don’t want to go storming through the rest. Best we take our time ‘n savor it, aye?” He scooped Sofia up so he could bring her to her bedroom.

           Ella tucked Ezra in and kissed his forehead. “Goodnight my love.”

           Cyril took his place in his bed on the floor of Ezra’s room. It was remarkable because the old dog liked sleeping in the little boy’s room. Ella guessed it was because Ezra spent so much time inside reading with Cyril snoozing beside him on the sofa. Meanwhile, Anthea chose to sleep in Sofia’s room. She was very fond of the little girl who always took her out for adventures outside.

           So, Anthea followed them as they brought Sofia across the hall. She hopped up on the bed and curled up by Sofia’s feet.  

           Alfie and Ella kissed her goodnight before retiring to their own bedroom.

           Ella sank into bed as Alfie got ready for the night.

           “Y’know, I like the voices you do too.” She commented.

           “Aye?” He chuckled.

           “Your dragon voice is very nice.”

           “Nice?” He grinned and tossed his shirt to the side. Striding over, he grabbed his wife’s ankles to tug her down the bed.

           She stifled a squeal and giggled. “Alfie!”

           “Hush now. Don’t go waking up the whole house.” He murmured in a low voice and began to creep up her body until they were face to face.

           “Or what? You’ll eat me up?” She teased; her heart started to flutter in her chest. After years of being together, Alfie still never failed to make her swoon. It felt like every night she fell in love with him all over again. Whether they made love or she simply just fell asleep in his arms.

           He laughed and captured her lips with his. One hand pressed into the bed while the other lightly grazed down her side before resting on her thigh.

           When he drew back, she wove her fingers into his hair and pecked his lips a few more times. “I love you, Alfie Solomons.” She murmured.

           “And I love you too, Ella Solomons.” He replied, looking down at her with so much adoration in his eyes.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

           August 1940, the Solomons family traveled out to Small Heath. The twins’ birthday had been a few days earlier but they were now going to celebrate with Ella’s side of the family.

           It was a strange time to be celebrating anything. The continent was at war yet again. It had been almost a year since Britain declared war and started to mobilize. Ella got horrifying flashbacks off the time her brothers had been at war. It was so difficult to fathom that they would live through a repeat of the Great War. But this time, eyes were turned to the next generation. The generation that had been too young to fight, now they were ready.

           Ella urged Polly to do everything she could to keep the Peaky boys off the front lines. But it was futile, not with how headstrong they all were, and not with the draft initiated.

           Now they could all only hope this war wouldn’t last as long as the first one did. They could only hope it wouldn’t be as gruesome and wouldn’t claim as many lives.

           “Erdington then Castle Bromwich,” Arthur muttered under his breath as he stood by the kitchen counter, drink in hand.

           “They’re trying to get a better target.” Tommy agreed with a grim look.

           “Enough.” Polly shushed the men, pointing a cake knife at them. “No talk of the war, not tonight. Let the children be children.”

           “Sorry, Pol,” Arthur mumbled.

           Of course, the war was on all of their minds. It was nearly impossible to ignore it.

            Polly brought the two cakes over to set in front of Sofia and Ezra. As she lit the candles, the family gathered around the table and began to sing Happy Birthday.

           Ella was ready with her camera to take a picture of them as Alfie stood behind them, with a proud look on his face.

           But the moment didn’t last long.

           A loud explosion rocked the very ground and was almost immediately followed by a high pitched siren that had become so common to hear in the cities.

           The men who fought reacted the quickest. Alfie grabbed Sofia and Ezra by the hand and hurried them to the cellar doors. Polly gathered the rest of the children as Arthur hurried them all along. Ella set her camera down on the table and blew out the birthday candles so they wouldn’t catch anything on fire. Tommy shut the lights off in the house, making sure everything was off upstairs as well.

           Once dark, he glanced out the window.

           “Tommy, c’mon.” Ella urged and grabbed her brother by the arm.

           The two headed downstairs where the rest of the family was hiding out from the air raid.

           They knew it was a possibility it was a false alarm. There had been dozens. But there was no telling either way.

           “Mummy!” Sofia wailed.

           “I’m here, I’m here.” Ella hushed her softly and gathered her into her arms. Alfie held her and the twins close, gently soothing them.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

           It wasn’t a false alarm. Bombs shook the city with such intensity that everyone in the cellar was praying silently or out loud. It felt like they were down there for days when it was mere hours.

           No one could sleep that night. In the morning, Ella left the house, she couldn’t listen to the radio anymore. She walked down to the Bullring and found it in ruins. The buildings had been gutted and ash was covering the ground.

           It was nearly impossible to fully comprehend. People around her stood and stared at the scene in shock as well. Some were crying, others were too lost to react.

           Ella was in such a state that she didn’t notice Tommy standing next to her for a good while. When she did, she glanced up at him.

           He saw the same scared little girl who asked her older brothers not to go to France. She was too afraid they wouldn’t come back. She was still there, the scared girl who was afraid of what war would bring her family.

           “I’ve got a few leads on houses in the countryside. Plenty of space for you and the kids.” Tommy said quietly.

           “We have Margate.”

           “Alfie wants to stay away from any city or town. Anything that might become a target. The country is the best option.”

           “You spoke to him?”

           “Last night.”

           Ella’s stomach was in knots. “Okay.”

           He nodded. “Stay in Margate until then.”

           “We will.”

~~~~~~~~~~~

           Alfie was still at the flat with the rest of the family when Ella returned. He was sitting by the radio with Arthur, both of them silent. Ezra was laying on the carpet, drawing while Sofia sat on Alfie’s lap.

           Arthur turned the volume down a bit when his sister came in. “Alright, El?”

           “Yeah, I think we’re going to go back to Margate.” She said quietly.

           Alfie nodded. “Sof and Ez go get your things, yeah?”

           The kids got up to gather their things as Alfie stood up from the armchair. “Did Tommy talk to you about our plan?”

           She nodded. “Yeah, he did.”

           “That’s okay?”

           “We need to keep them safe.” She concluded. “Anyway, we can.”

           “Okay.” He kissed her forehead and rubbed her shoulder.

~~~~~~~~~~

           It didn’t take long before Tommy bought the Solomons a place in the countryside. A lovely little home with a sprawling garden and plenty of space for the twins and the dogs.

           He saw them off at the train station. Most likely, it would be some time before they saw one another again. Knowing Ella, she would keep her children in the safest possible place until they were guaranteed safety in the outside world. Tommy knew he had to respect that.

           “Bye Uncle Tommy.” Ezra and Sofia chimed off, each giving him a big hug.

           “Be good for mum and dad, aye?” He said gently. “Make sure you give everyone a call once and a while, okay?”

           “Okay!”

           “Tom.” Alfie gave his brother-in-law a hearty handshake. “Thanks, mate.”

           “Of course.”

           Ella swallowed her tears as she hugged Tommy next. “Thank you.”

           “I should’ve done this for you when you asked all those years ago. When you wanted to be free and safe.”

           “I never would’ve met Alfie if you did.” She pointed out with a tearful smile.

           “I guess so.” He chuckled and let go of her.

           “Right, ready then?” Alfie helped the kids up into the car of the train then held a hand out to his wife.

           She nodded. “Ready.”  

-The end

//Thank you to everyone who stuck around for this long! It was so hard to end this but I leave the rest up to season 6 and see how things go from there. Huge thanks to my tag lists. If you’re interested my masterlist of all my oneshots and series are pinned to the top of my blog and my requests are open.I’m currently working on a new Alfie series so stay tuned. In the mean time I have a lot of Alfie one shots with more on the way as well as plenty of Tommy content. 

Thank you again!

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Masterpost

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[joezworld]

Sentient vehicle headcanon - The Falklands war

Normally I try to tell these headcanons in a manner similar to Wikipedia - only keeping the relevant details. However, this one is so insane that even in my head, I feel it needs to be told differently. 

So, for the purposes of this headcanon, pretend that this is being told to you by your friend, who is desperately trying to appear normal while telling you about a Wikipedia article he just read. 

So, this entire story is fucking insane - there’s so much that goes on, lemme just start at the beginning. 

So, the UK owns these little islands off the coast of Argentina in the middle of goddamn nowhere. The Argentinians really don’t like this because the islands are much closer to them and they say that they own it - but it’s like that one Eddie Izzard bit - do you have a flag?  - And the brits did and the Argentinians didn’t, so everybody said that england had the islands.

Naturally this made Argentina very mad, but they didn’t do anything about it because they had shit goin’ on. Because like, all of South America had really bad shit happening to it between the 30′s and the 90′s - so nothing happened. 

Until in the 80′s, when Argentina had a military dictatorship called a Junta - which led through the very nice and normal way of ‘taking anyone they didn’t like and throwing them out of helicopters’ - the government had basically spun up their propaganda mill to the point where they actually believed that they could take the Falklands and the British wouldn’t do anything!

And they did this in 1982, which is like the exact wrong time to piss off the UK, because they used to be the biggest empire the world has ever seen, and then in like the last 20 years they lost India and Pakistan, had to give Canada their constitution back, and they were about to do the same to Australia and New Zealand, and they had basically signed Hong Kong back over to the Chinese. 

-And you know *spoiler alert* they didn’t give Hong Kong back, but at the time they thought they were gonna! - 

And so this means that the UK is feeling really bad about itself going into this whole thing, and then this punk-ass little country with like two ships in its navy tries to start shit because they think that The Queen won’t do anything. 

Except, they aren’t dealing with the Queen, they’re dealing with Margaret Thatcher - who will kill you, your dog, your family, and anybody who ever sold you a cannoli if she thinks it’ll make England strong.

So - even from this point, the Argentinians are gonna die, but what happens next is so out-of-left-field that it’s astounding. 

-

So, let’s roll back the clock a few weeks and The USS Montana is about to get involved. 

So, Montana is this pugnacious old man of a heavy cruiser who’s been with the navy since before World War 1. He has this amazing history going through every war the US has been in - and he’s amazing: when they tried to retire him after the first world war, he told them no, and said he’d raise a pirate flag and follow the sixth fleet around if they didn’t let him stay. So they did, and he served in every war and conflict the US was in until the 80′s. 

And this is kinda important, because when he was built, it was before the wars - everything was a bit slower, a bit more laid back, and he actually got a lot of family bonding with the other ships in the Navy and in his class, and it meant that he wasn’t like, sad and miserable and scared when the war happened. 

Flash forward to 1946, and the US has just built like hundreds of ships to kill the Axis with, and they did it so quickly that most of these guys went from the drydock to the battlefield with no real training or anything - so they were really fucked up when they came back. 

So, when Montana sees this, he decides that he’s basically going to be the father figure that everyone didn’t have - and basically makes most of the navy his kids - like straight up his sons and daughters, no questions asked. And he did this for almost every ship the Navy built between 1950 and the 80′s.

Which means that basically the entire US Navy loves him unconditionally. 

Like, I can’t stress this enough - he was their dad - he taught Iowa class battleships how to go fishing, he gave the birds and the bees talk to submarines, like, everything he did was for his kids or for his country. 

And so, one day in 1982, he gets a call from one of his kids who’s moved down to Argentina - which I need to point out that a lot of US ships went down to South America in the 40s and 50s, but a lot of them did that because they were fucked up from WW2, and most of them didn’t get to know Montana very well - so they weren’t ‘his kids’. 

But one of them was, and he calls up his dad and says “Hey dad, uhh, my bosses have really started to believe their own BS and they think that they can take on the UK - and I think that I’m gonna die, because I work with these people and we are not gonna be able to win this. Please help me.” 

And so Montana tells him to calm down, and he’s gonna get him out of this. And then he goes to his bosses at the navy, says he’s using some leave time to go rescue his kid, and the Navy realizes that they’re never gonna be able to talk him out of this, so they call up the chain to Washington and cut him some orders that say that he’s a ‘neutral observer’ so that nobody shoots at him. 

And this seems like its all going to go just fine, except that several ships in the Argentinian Navy were made by the West Germans, and have NO IDEA who this guy is - because even the American ships who aren’t his kids still know him, because how can you not.

And so he makes it almost all the way to Argentina when one of the Argentinian submarines - who was German - sees him, has no idea who he is, doesn’t know about the neutral observer thing because the Argentine Navy is a clusterfuck, and sinks him! And he dies!

And I can- I- This is so bad!

Because now, the US NAVY is involved. 

And They. Are. Pissed. 

Because Their DAD JUST GOT MURDERED!!!!!!

And the Argentinians have no idea what’s happening - they have no idea that this guy is important or that he even got sunk! Because the submarine just assumed he was English and called in that he’d sunk a British advance party or something, and it takes like a week for the Americans to put two and two together, so for a while, nobody knows what’s happened - it’s like they’ve stepped on a land mine and it hasn’t gone off yet. 

-

But because no one knows the enormity of the shitstorm the Argentinians are gonna be facing yet, the British are still mobilizing - they didn’t do what the Americans did and set up a network of navy and air bases all over the world in case they need to kick someone’s ass in the future - and all the countries around the south Atlantic either hate them, or are former colonies who really hate the English. So they have to schlep everything they need to fight a war alllll the way down from England to Argentina - which is like the furthest distance you can go without running into the British Empire it’s so far why. 

And so the Royal Navy has to call in the civilian reserve fleet, which is a bunch of ocean liners and container ships who really would rather be flagged under any other nation right now, but they’re not!, so they have to go basically become war-adjacent for a while - just hanging out in the frigid North Atlantic until the Royal Navy finishes kicking ass and taking names and then they can go home. 

Except. 

Except. 

EXCEPT THAT 

The Argentine Navy is a bunch of suicidal morons!

Because they saw that the British didn’t have enough logistics vessels and was requisitioning ferry boats and ocean liners and had a brainwave: 

¡ Hey !  ¡ If we shoot at these unarmed ferry boats and container ships, not only will the Brits not have any logistical support, but they might get scared and go home!

Which sounds like a good plan, until you realize that the Royal Navy is not pleased that they have to bring civilian ships into battle - like the aircraft carriers and the destroyers see this as ‘a stain on their character’ for having to ‘endanger civilians unduly’ because they’re posh and they’re English but also they’re right - this is not a place for civvies - Exocet missiles are gonna be flying around, it’s not safe. 

Also, the Royal Navy had a very dim view of this whole conflict, because they thought it was pointless to sail halfway across the ocean just to fight over a tiny island with 3 people on it - if they wanted to expand the empire just invade Ireland or something. 

- Now, that sounds bad, but this was the 80′s - The Troubles were ongoing, and in the Royal Navy at least, they liked the Irish a lot less than the Argentinians! -

Also, Ireland was closer. 

But anyways, the RN ships at least had a rather dim view of the whole conflict, right up until the SS Atlantic Conveyor took an Exocet to the fuckin’ face.

And he dies. 

And this is almost as bad as sinking Montana, because Atlantic Conveyor had this really unique ability to make friends with anyone, and had spent most of the voyage down basically being the flotilla’s morale officer. 

So when he dies, this stops being a token effort to restore British Sovereignty, and starts being The Royal Navy Wants You Dead. 

Which, on its own, would have meant that Argentinian Navy would have been wiped from the face of the earth - because the Royal Navy wasn’t leaving until everyone was dead. It didn’t matter if it was a tugboat with a handgun - there would be no more Argentinian Navy when they were done. 

-

Now. 

Now.

Meanwhile in America, while the Royal Navy is still steaming down to the Islands, words starts to get around that someone killed Dad.

And this went over exactly as well as you think it would. 

The ships of the US Navy reacted calmly and coolly, and didn’t cry or scream or plot revenge. 

They totally didn’t. 

Except that they totally did, and spent a few days gathering every bullet, shell, round, and torpedo they could find, before leaving with the intent of finding and killing everyone in the Argentinian military. 

Now, that might sound like a generalization, but it wasn’t. 

There were somewhere around 370 ships in the US Navy at that time, and about 280 of them were capable of reaching Argentina without leaving the US vulnerable to an attack  - plus about another 200 or so that had retired from the navy or transferred to other nations but still kept in touch. 

So that’s about 500 battleships, destroyers, submarines, amphibious assault ships, support vessels, aircraft carriers, tankers, oilers, troop transports, guided missile cruisers and the Presidential Yacht. 

All of them went to Argentina. Every last one of them.

And no-one believed it!

The British thought it was a joke, and the Argentinians thought it was counter-intelligence!

The ENTIRE US NAVY just up and left to kick someone’s ass! That doesn’t happen! That didn’t happen in WW2! This has never happened before or since in US history! Even when the US Navy was a bunch of sailboats in Philadelphia nobody did that!

-

And So, that’s how it was - the US Navy was steaming down en mass to fuck up the Argentinians, the Royal Navy was hopping mad, and the Argentinians didn’t even know anything was going to happen!

Also, before I forget, also on top of all this - Atlantic Conveyor was friends with a bunch of ocean liners, and because they’re all fucking insane - Normandie spent WW2 fucking up U-Boats in the Caribbean, and the United States sailed into a Cat 5 hurricane, and Olympic is one of the reasons that Singapore got kicked out of Malaysia - so, they all decided that their friend dying was worth fighting for, and they got together and steamed down to the South Atlantic at the same time the Americans were, and set like 9 speed records in the process because of course they did. 

-

So, now that there’s essentially three giant navies coming down to kick their asses, the Argentinians finally  begin to clue in on something being wrong - like, there were a couple of Soviet Trawlers that were parked offshore, and they claimed to be fishing but in reality they were spying - and they had these giant radio masts that they’d put up whenever orders came down from Moscow. 

And one day, the Argentinians watched from their spy planes as the masts went up slowly, then got taken down very quickly, and then they watched as the two spy trawlers went racing off towards Africa. 

And they wondered why they were going towards Africa, because the soviet union is the other way - you need to steam around the edge of South America, until they called down to Ushuaia - in Tierra Del Fuego, and heard that what looked like half the US Navy was coming round the tip of South America. 

And it looked like that because it was! Because half of the US Navy had sailed down from the pacific to cut off any way of escape! 

It was only now, at this incredibly late time, that the Argentinians realized exactly how Fucked  they were. 

-

Now, at this point, a smart man would have given up - but Galtierei was not. 

So naturally the Argentinians kept fighting for a whole week before they all just died. 

And it wasn’t in normal “get shot with a missile and sink” ways either - like, one of their cruisers fired on a ship, and it turned out to be the USS Missouri, who was right next to the other three Iowa Class battleships, and they all targeted this ship, and made him disappear because that’s what happens when the four biggest battleships on earth shoot at you at once. 

Or, the Submarines - the one that sank Montana got chased by 4 Los Angeles class attack subs and ended up getting pushed beneath his crush depth - not hit with a torpedo, PUSHED. The other one, meanwhile, tried to shoot at one of the Ocean Liners, and ended up getting sunk by them! Which is incredible, because Nobody expected that to happen, least of all the Liners, and yet they just totally went in and contributed - which actually means that there’s a third “belligerents” column for the Wikipedia page for this, and it’s just them. 

So the war actually ended on kind of an anti-climax, because after the US just steamrolled the Argentinians, there wasn’t anything left to do. The Brits landed more troops at Port Stanley, and then they just sort of went home. 

Most of the Americans did too, but they also went and installed a new government in Argentina! 

Which, as the rumor goes, the Navy did that without asking anyone, and BOY O BOY was the State Department Upset - I think a lot of people got fired or demoted for that. 

But it did turn out well in the end, because unlike every other time the US tried to install a leader, it actually went rather well, and the guy they put in charge left when he lost his re-election, and now Argentina is a democratic ally and a partner in Peace! 

Who still claim that they own the Falklands

[flamingo-writes]

A Little Crazy — Tendo Satori x Reader [drabble]

Since I am posting this from the app, I cant keep the usual format my posts have, but fuck it. This is a drabble after all and I wrote it in like a single hour

A/N: so, I'm really projecting myself here. This drabble was inspired by the few fanart and official art in which Satori has a hoodie with something written in katakana. In the official art, I can't fully read the entire thing, but I am pretty much conviced its メキシコ (as the only thing I can read is the キシコ part) which translates as Mexico. And those who know me/have chatter with me can tell you I am Mexican so 🤣 the fact that Satori has a Mexico hoodie made me live him more than I already did.

Summary: Pursuing a career in professional volleyball had led you with a proposal to join a team in a foreign world. However, its not easy to give up on your life as you know it. Specially after spending your highschool years next to your boyfriend, who you loved dearly, but hadn't addressed the elephant in the room just yet.

Word count: 1.1K words

Posted: 07.06.2020

Warnings: a little bit of angst, but with a fluffy ending.

"So...professional volleyball, huh?" Tendo's voice broke the silence, as the anxiety twisted your gut as he addressed the elephant in the room. 

Earlier that day, after receiving the news, you ran to tell your friends, as well as your boyfriend Tendo. Wakatoshi congratulated you, blessing you with one of those rare smiles that felt like finding a four leafed clover. At the time, Satori got excited and hugged you and jumped like an excited dog yelling along with you. 

However, you knew there was something more to address with Satori. You'd been dating for most of your high school years. After meeting in your first year, the instant chemistry and both your impulsive natures led you to start dating three months after meeting each other. 

"I'm a bit scared you know?" You giggled awkwardly. "Flying across the Pacific Ocean, moving into a country I barely know a thing about. I don't even know Spanish, and my English is the worst, I don't know how I'm going to survive" you admitted, only adding to your own fear. 

"I've been there once, it's nice" Satori said leaning against the balcony from the viewpoint as the night city glowed in neon lights. 

"I can tell. You always wear your Mexico's hoodie underneath the uniform's blazer" you giggled. 

"So, this is it?" He said bluntly as your heart shrunk painfully. "Y'know, it's been the best two years and a half of my life" 

"Tendo…" You whispered as tears began filling your eyes.

"Thank you for not treating me like a weirdo. And thank you for putting up with my fangirling about Shonen Jump, and even for giving in to my endless nagging about you reading One Piece and Kimetsu…" 

"Stop that" Your voice broke "You make me feel like I'm dying or something" you chuckled bitterly, as tears began falling down your cheeks. 

"Oh, I'm sorry. I really pulled a Wakatoshi there, didn't I?" He looked at you, noticing the tears as you silently wiped them away with your sleeve.

"Yeah, you did" 

"[Name]?" He said in a gentle voice.

"Yes?" 

"I love you" hearing him broke your heart instantly, as you sobbed silently and looked up at him "Don't forget that when you move to Mexico, okay?" 

"I love you too, Tori-kun" you sobbed, hugging him and burying your face in his chest as you kept crying quietly. "You're my favorite part of my whole high school experience" 

"Am I? More than volleyball?" His voice became more playful than earlier.

"From the moment I started high school at Shiratorizawa, I was already aiming for professional volleyball. You were a pleasant surprise, I never thought I'd meet someone like you here" Looking up, you met his eyes, reflecting a tender stare that only shone through his eyes when you were alone.

"Someone like me?" 

"A yokai boy, an actual satori, you know? A playful spirit with mind reading skills that likes to creep people out, but doesn't harm them" 

Satori chuckled amused by how you described him.

"That's how you see me?" He smirked trying to hide the pain he was feeling at the time.

"I see a weirdo, and a nerd, a smartass. I also see someone who's kind, and gentle, and funny. I see you and my heart still goes all crazy everytime I see you" 

"Baby, if you keep going I'm gonna puke from how cheesy you sound" He giggled leaning down and stealing a kiss from you. "I'm always thinking what I'd do without you, I never thought it'd come the day I'd have to answer that question…" 

As much as he was happy to see you achieve your dream, he still felt bitter about the idea of letting you go. He even fantasized about convincing you to stay, but he would never be able to do that in real life. Even when he didn't like volleyball enough to pursue a career, he knew you did. And he was not going to ruin your chance of actually going to join a professional team.

"Don't" Your voice broke him apart from the sour series of thoughts that were making him feel more and more miserable as your time together seemed to be running out.

"You said something, baby?" He said looking at you, as now it was.him who was trying to keep the tears from falling down his cheeks. 

"Don't" You repeated.

"What?" 

"Come to Mexico with me" Your question left him speechless. Not just that, but his mind simply turned off.

"What?" He muttered barely making a sound.

"I'm serious" You said.

"I know you are, baby!" Satori chuckled. "I-I...whoa, for the first time I don't know what to say…" A few tears escaped from the corner of his eyes as he tried to stay composed "Congratulations, you left the mind reading yokai completely blank" He joked.

"You can go to college there, I don't know if you can buy Jump there, but worst case scenario, you can ask Goshiki to send you the weekly jumps…" you shrugged before locking eyes with him "Why are you giving me that look?" 

"I-I…I don't...know…" Satori's voice broke slightly as he tried to mask it with an awkward chuckle. "Not to get all sentimental and psychological but…" 

He stopped as he took a deep breath, thinking how he was actually very close to breaking down. Overwhelming thoughts running in all directions in his head. 

"It's hard for me to believe sometimes how much you love me. I-I mean...Yeah, growing up I was the weirdo no one wanted to befriend. And here you are, wanting to export me across the sea…" He chuckled at his own joke, trying to cope with everything he was feeling.

"Export" you giggled "what are you? A package?" 

"One of the finest quality" He answered as more tears fell down his eyes and he looked away, wiping them with his fingers. 

"I love you, Satori, I really do" You whispered "I-I mean, if you don't want to go to Mexico, I get it. It's not...easy…" Upon your realization of what you'd asked him, you suddenly felt embarrassed "One thing is moving from one city to another, and that's already hard...moving countries must be…" 

"I do" He interrupted you with a soft voice.

"What?" 

"Whoa, that sounded as if I was answering a marriage proposal" Satori laughed. "Which isn't so different from asking your boyfriend to move in to Mexico with you, if you ask me—" 

"Wait, you mean that?" You cut him off.

"Is it a crazy idea? Yes, yes it is. But we're both a little bit crazy for agreeing into dating each other, aren't we?" He shrugged.

"Tori-kun!" you giggled, hugging him once more, as he brushed your hair, kissing your forehead. 

[multifandomhoodies]

. Here’s a. bit of a write up on corps life. 

my big number one? I wanna go back lmao. I’ve been home for a few days and I’m already to go back out there. 

Anyways. I spent two months camping and working in the pacific northwest and. honestly it was the most incredible experience of my life. I was on a five person crew (four members and a lead) and of that group there were only two people that hadn’t already done a session of conservation corps either at this corps or a different one. This was my first time doing a corps! I was like. deadass shitting a brick before I left. I was so nervous to fly across the country (I’d never even flown before!) and go do something I’d never done for two months. I’ve been camping. I’ve been hiking. I’d worked outside for the last nine months and had two seasons of outdoor work in park maintenance. but this was living out of tent for TWO months. I was super excited but I was. so fucking nervous too. And god to fly? Airports seemed scary and busy and I was scared I was gonna miss a flight or not be able to find where to go. So the weeks leading up to my trip I was so goddamn nervous. But I did it lmao. 

And then. corps life. We spent the first day doing orientation where I met my crew!! and then left to head to our campsite where we’d do saw training the next three days. We left the parking lot of headquarters to Colter Wall’s “The Devil Wears a Suit and Tie” and headed to an area in the Willamette National Forest. The drive there was incredible. I’d flown into Oregon the night before and really hadn’t seen much because it was 9:30 when I landed and had only taken a short lyft ride to headquarters p early in the morning so. This was kind of my first time getting to see more than the freeway of Oregon. It was so beautiful. The big ass trees and the river and the mountains were just. incredible. And then that night two of my crewmates made entirely too much spaghetti which we had for two nights. We then had to use the leftover sauce for another meal. Fun fact! We only had spaghetti once more after that. In two months. Spaghetti is usually a staple on corps. Not on Red Crew. We were scared. Also the crewmember who doled out the pasta portions for that very first dinner of too much spaghetti was banned by our crew contract from doling out grain portions. After that, we went into saw training. Three straight days of saw training and evaluations on the last day. We were starting at seven I think? Like, meeting a five minute walk away in full ppe with saws ready to go at 7am. I think I wrote that I woke up at 4:45 the one morning but honestly that may have been the jet lag. Saw training was exhausting but it was so much fun too. There was a lot of information to take in and I’d at least run a chainsaw before. There were people that hadn’t run saws before at all. On the third day of saw training, we loaded up into our rig (by the way! 2021 ford f250. super duty cab. extended bed with a truck cap. gigantic. massive. imposing. it also had no labelling. it was not marked with anything corps related. it did not even have license plates. it was probably a little intimidating when we were bass boosting driving around in that thing. but whiplash inducing bass boosting because like. notorious big to mumford and sons back to back. can you believe that we never got pulled over in driving almost 5,000 miles). anyways. we did saw evals in a burned zone. I got my bar pinched. I know what I’d do differently now but I have a lot more saw time. But I passed! My whole crew passed and are now USDA National Sawyer Certification A Class Sawyers. Or Feller 3s depending on how you wanna say it. I’m super happy because I got my first professional certification at 19. Although my card says I got it after my birthday but I did my eval before I turned 20 so I’m gonna take it. 

After saw training, we went up to a suburb of Portland to. sigh. move sticks for Karens. The area we were in SCREAMED homeowners association. in the name of “fuels reduction” they had us pick up sticks and hike them down to the road. The sticks were down because the trees were dying from this shitty little park. The first week was cold and rainy and we moved sticks. We cleared out an area close to the road the first day and then the rest of the week we had to swamp (move/clear) sticks up a hill onto this narrow trail. Everyone had blisters because no one was used to walking up and down a hill all day. Carrying wet and occasionally rotting sticks. We’d hike it up the hill to the trail and then load sticks into shitty wheelbarrows and then take those down this narrow path on a steep hill when it was fully loaded with sticks. By the end of the week we were walking a good quarter/half mile to the the road with heavy wheelbarrows. It was miserable. NO one wanted to complain because it was our first project but. eventually we all came to the conclusion that it was bullshit. It had nice views tho. Still my least favorite project. Even thought it was miserable I still like. had fun?? 

After that we went into Washington and planted trees. We actually did this for two weeks but with another site in between. This site uh. did not have bathrooms. Learned how to use a cathole. It hailed the first time I used a cathole. That was exceptionally miserable. But we planted trees! I wasn’t a huge fan of the site our first time there but I warmed up to it. We planted over 3,000 trees in our two weeks. One of our project partners stayed out with us, which mad respect. He was so sweet. We all joked that we were a little in love with him. He wound up hanging out with us during a few of our campfires. He told us about this trip he’d taken back in college to Peru. At this site we coined the phrase “meat plate” which would stay with us until the end of session. Meat plate is dinner that is just, assorted meats that need to be gotten out of the coolers. Also on this site a crewmember got his hand in stinging nettle while taking a shit. The first week was cold. It was rainy and shitty, mostly on the weekend. We did check out the ocean though!! I’d never been to see the ocean and we took the 101 north from near the Willamette to where we were and stopped actually at Fort Stevens State Park and that’s where I got to see the ocean for the first time. In march! It was sunny but actually super nice. We all waded in and one of my crewmates jumped in. It was march. IT was cold. This is the Pacific Ocean. Anyways he’s built different. The second time at the site was a week later, and it was super pretty. It was much better weather. We planted more trees. 

Third week was further in Washington like an hour drive from Olympia. This was my first time seeing snow covered mountains that were massive in the distance. We cleaned up 195 trashbags of plastic plant protectors. Also kind of a shitty project but hey. Wasn’t hiking stuff up hills so. Our partner for this had people come talk to us for educational stuff which was okay, bad, and fantastic in order lol. The partner sent people from their org to be with the speakers (who weren’t part of the org) and we told the one lady what we’d been doing and she started LAUGHING and she was like “I’m sorry they gave you that project it’s because no one else wanted to do it” thanks. it was a shitty task but our partners were so nice that it made up for it. they even got a portapotty on site for us. no but they were all super nice. oh god they’d told us not to yell/slam doors/make loud noises because there was an owl in the barn on the property. we all were loud people and kind of forgot but it was okay we didn’t scare the bird. the bird scared us. one of my crewmates got up to go pee in the middle of the night and it swooped at him. this place was great for birds. We had a very angery killdeer beep at us!! we pulled out scotchbroom from the corner of the property and every time we walked near where it must have had its nest it would very angrily beep at us. It was so cute. We all loved it. My crewlead would always yell back at it. “What!! What do you want!!” I love that lil bird. Pulling out scotchbroom was a trip. To pull out scotchbroom you should in theory be ale to use a weedwrench to pry it out. Right? No. This was old growth scotch broom. This stuff was two inches in diameter as the smallest. It wouldn’t always fit in the weedwrenches. At one point it took me, my crewlead, and a crewmate to pull a scotchbroom with as much force/bodyweight as we could put on it. A couple times my crewlead put his entire bodyweight on to it and wound up falling into blackberry lmao. There was so much blackberry there too my god. It was so painful. We all kept joking about letting our crewlead just burn the area in a prescribed burn to get rid of the invasives. In the parking lot of a different preserve from the same partner org I found a red dinosaur who became one of our crew mascots.

After our second week back planting trees, we headed back down to Oregon to work on a fuels reduction project. We were all so excited for this one. We’d gotten certed for saws at the beginning of the session and had been told that we were gonna be a saw crew doing mostly fuels reduction which our lead had specifically asked to do because he had experience with it. But this was our first real saw project with fuels reduction. The weather this week was amazing. It didn’t rain at all, which on the West side of the Cascades in Oregon in April is pretty weird. It was nice for us but Oregon was and maybe still is in a drought. yikes! anyways. this is when we went on a hike to Blue Pool in the Wilamette National Forest. We camped at a little municipal park with another crew! It was weird being around another crew again because we’d spent so long just on our own that we all starting to lose it a little. But the other crew was super nice and we played frisbee in the dark with them the first night we were in the area. The project? was amazing. We worked on private project with a conglomerate of partners in doing fuels reduction. This conglomerate of partners did a whole bunch of other stuff but we only did fuels reduction. That was a week of working in a burn zone moving sticks. Moving sticks and swamping and making sure piles were neat to be able to be chipped. We learned about dispersing and how to remove ladder fuels and where to leave small logs on the ground for ground fuel. My crewlead showed us hazard trees and took a few out. I really loved this project. I loved the “grab stick go” part of it. It was so much fun. I also got to run a lot of saw which was nice. And this property bordered a parcel of BLM land which wound up being the spot we went to go pee at. If you’ve never been West of the Mississippi river, which I hadn’t(!) you’ve never had the opportunity to be on BLM land. There is no BLM land in the East. I wanted to go on all five of big public land holders in the US and that’s the one I don’t have access to here at home. We actually wound up taking a “nature appreciation walk” because we finished our work early around this little nugget of land and it was so cool. It was right on the McKenzie river and it was beautiful. I found our second crew pet/mascot there, a large palm sized egg shaped rock named “Egg.” We were so filthy there. Four 10s in a burn zone makes ya pretty stinky when you dont get to shower. Actually, we weren’t as stinky here because we just smelled like ash. I had ash everywhere. We went out to eat after the last day and my crewlead hadn’t washed his face in four days and was completely covered in ash. 

Our last project took us 8 hours back into Washington. It was a long fucking drive. We stopped at Voodoo Doughnuts in Portland tho which was incredible. We rolled into our spot in Washington at 12:40. We slept with our sleeping pads and sleeping bags under a pavilion and were woken up by a ranger the next morning who thought we were homeless or illegally camping. This last project was also kinda bullshit. We were working with the Feds who kept telling us to slow down. We were at this project site for three weeks. The first week we cleared trails of downed trees and brushcut. The second and third weeks we helped General Maintenance take down trees and did so many runs to the dumpsite. We moved a lot of sticks and logs and my arms still look super scratched from moving branches. This spot was in the high desert of Eastern Washington and it was actually super pretty. I didn’t think I’d like the desert all that much but there was definitely a beauty to it. There wasn’t shit out there other than the dam. From there tho we were able to go to Leavenworth, this funky little Bavarian themed village up near the Cascades. We also went to Lake Wenatchee, which wasn’t as fun because we had to go move a fridge for the office staff. We spent about seven and a half hours on our last weekend doing this. I’m not salty. But it was super beautiful so. It’s okay. And we passed a prescribed burn on the way back to our site. 

There’s still so much more I want to write and talk about. I have to say I’m overall. just so glad I did this. I had the absolute time of my life. I have never had so much fun. I learned so much. I learned how to really put out a fire with a pulaski from my crewlead. He taught us how to use the Incident Response Pocket Guide to cross reference and look at the probability of ignition. I learned how to use a chainsaw decently well. I did a lot of things that were far beyond my comfort zone. To fly literally halfway across the country, from Ohio to Oregon, for two months and to live in a tent and work on a conservation corps, it was super beyond my comfort zone. I did things with a saw that were beyond my comfort zone and I had to trust in my ability to saw and trust in my crewlead to let me do something he felt comfortable with me doing and thought was in my capability. And it was it was so fucking cool. I really bonded with everyone on y crew too. I made some good friends. And just like. The things I was able to see and do were amazing. And it was so nice to spend so much time outside. I didn’t spend more than an hour or two at most in a building in two months. I worked in 50s and rain wearing rainpants and chainsaw chaps and I worked in the 80s and sun in chainsaw chaps. I was able to lift a full 5 gal of water (40lbs) onto my shoulder and I’m still super proud of it. I watched a ton of movies in the rig with my crewlead and one of my crewmates. I got to use my crewlead’s chainsaw which was a lot cooler, sharper, and bigger than our corps saws. I cried about trees a lot. I celebrated my 20th birthday in a state park with people I didn’t really know too well who surprised me with homemade rice crispie treats and snacks from the Chevron we were regulars for that week at. I hiked some really pretty trails. I gave a lot of hugs and got a lot of hugs. I became not as terrible at hacky sack. I realized that There Are People In My Life Who See Good Things In Me and I Just Want To Keep Making Them Proud. I realized that I’m incredibly hard on myself. This whole thing furthered my belief of goddammit if I wanna do it by god I’ll do it. It’s been a dream of mine since I was 15 to go be on a conservation corps. I got interested in corps life at 15 because of Youth Conservation Corps posting in Wayne National Forest in southern ohio and since then had just. Always wanted to do it. And that literally changed my life - because of just hearing about corps I got super into parks and researched it and was like “oh i wanna be a park ranger” and I started working at the park doing maintenance and went to school briefly for parks and rec management and then dropped out to work more in parks. but then this year, after five years of wanting to do it, I finally did a conservation corps. Not a youth corps but an adult corps. Five years! The biggest dream I had was to work on a conservation corps. I just wanted to use a pulaski on a trail once. And I did at our last project site, even just removing invasives. But just. This experience was something I’d wanted to do for so long and to finally do it and have it be as amazing as I thought was just amazing. My crewlead saw me taking pictures in Washington along the Willapa bay and was just like “corps is a slippery slope. You either hate it or you get addicted to it.” Tragically I’m addicted to it. I can’t wait until next January and March to get back out there. It was such an amazing experience and I feel like I learned a lot of really good soft skills and really good hard skills. I can’t possibly explain to anyone the full extent of what this meant to me and all the fun I had but. This is a long post and I have to go replace my phone so this will be it for now. In the off chance anyone made it this far, thanks. 

[ilguna]

Tacenda - Chapter Thirteen (f.o)

Summary: you’ll never truly be free from the Capitol.

Word Count; 3.8k

Warnings; swearing, DEATH MENTION

NOTES: i give reader a last name to fit the world.

–

The wall finally breaks, and you’re sent flying forward. You toss the knife off of you as you throw yourself at Finnick, pulling him against you as tight as you possibly can without hurting him. His hands had long since been removed from his ears.

He meets you with the same amount of enthusiasm, but you don’t see it that way. You wanted to cry the entire time the hour was going on, watching as his facial expressions turned from okay, to bad, to worse. It has taken its toll on him, and it’s so painfully obvious.

Finnick buries himself into your neck, and you can feel the tears. You put your head against his, brushing his hair back as you try to rock him slightly, “It’s okay, I’m right here. I’m right here, Finn.”

His arms are tight around you, and you look over to see Johanna. She’s in pain too, watching as he holds onto you. You can feel him trembling slightly in your arms. All you want to do is scream at the gamemakers for purposely trapping him into something like that.

“It was you,” Finnick says, his voice is amazingly even, “And the rest of your family with Mags.”

You tilt your head slightly, “How did they…? Don’t jabberyjays copy?”

“They can.” Beetee says, “But they can always fabricate the sounds. Computer generated.”

You look over, “I understand how they got myself, but how would they get Mags, and my siblings? Mags hasn’t spoken in years and my siblings have never been on television, ever. I’ve made sure that they haven’t because I don’t want them to have the publicity.”

“Same goes for Prim.” Peeta says.

Beetee shrugs, “It’s not far off to think that they might have taken them speaking to other people and changed it to fit.”

Your arms tighten around Finnick a little bit at the idea that they would have recorded your families voices without permission.

“They won’t touch Prim.” Peeta tells Katniss.

You don’t move off of Finnick, because his arms are still tight around you. Instead, you carefully play with his hair, and sink down a little bit lower on his lap. When you’re completely sitting on his thighs, this is when you rub his back gently.

“Your fiance’s right, the whole country loves your sister.” Johanna says, you don’t move from where you are against Finnick, “If they tortured her–if they did anything to her, forget the districts. There would be riots in the damn Capitol.”

There’s silence for a moment, and then Johanna starts yelling, “Hey, how does that sound, Snow? What if we–what if we set your backyard on fire? You know you can’t put everybody in here.”

You laugh a little bit, and Finnick does too.

“What?” she asks, quieter now, “He can’t hurt me. There’s no one left that I love.”

She says that she’s going to go ahead and get Katniss some water, walking off.

It’s a couple of minutes before Finnick lets you away from him. You help him to his feet, and even then he looks distant. He looks as distant as you felt when you had just woken up from the nap that you were taking. Regardless, he holds onto your hand tightly, and doesn’t let it go no matter what when you all start to move back to the beach.

He stabs his trident into the sand, but it eventually falls over. His hand also lets go of yours, and he heads straight into the water, sitting down.

You stand almost helplessly, clenching and unclenching your teeth. Seeing Finnick like this makes you want to cry, just like you had wanted to cry, seeing him inside of that wall. Alone, and watching him turn numb as time went on.

It was the longer hour of your goddamn life, watching him like that.

“Go sit with him.” Johanna tells you, nodding her head forward.

“I think he needs space.” you say, but you make no move to sit down next to anyone. Instead, you cross your arms and stare at Finnick’s indifferent body.

The Capitol will pay for this. They’ll pay for all of this as soon as this is over. There’s going to be hell, and you’ll be at the front lines with it. Because in no fucking life of yours, will this be acceptable.

“He’ll be okay.” Peeta says.

You ignore him, finally deciding to go and join Finnick in the water. You don’t touch him at all, wrapping your arms under your thighs as you lean forward. You let Finnick come to you, so you’re not overwhelming him with being on top of everything that he does.

He puts his arm around your waist, pulling you to his side, “Thank you.”

“For what?” you ask, watching as another wave comes over to you guys.

“For volunteering.” he says, and you look over in surprise, “For telling Elysia to call boys first so you would know to volunteer.”

“Finnick…”

He shakes his head, looking back out to the water, “What if you had been at home? And we all still came across those jabberjays, and I was hearing your scream? I wouldn’t have known that you were okay. Not even after the birds stopped, I would have no clue.”

“I love you.” you tell him, moving one of your hands to place on his knee, “And I would literally go to the ends of the earth for you, you know that, right?”

Finnick nods, “I would do the same for you. I would have volunteered just the same. I don’t think I ended up telling you that.”

“I know you would.” you lean your head against his shoulder.

You guys sit here, watching the waves in silence. You let your legs down, fully submerging them and settling for sitting criss-cross for a while.

It’s at least fifteen minutes or so before it’s interrupted by Johanna yelling for you guys. Finnick gets up first, and helps you to your feet. The both of you go over to stand over everyone.

“Where do the careers feel safest? The jungle?” Beetee asks once you get there.

“Jungles a nightmare.” Johanna says.

“Probably here on the beach.” Finnick answers.

“Then why are they not here?” Beetee asks.

“Because we are.” Johanna leans forward a bit when she talks, “We claimed it.”

Beetee looks around you guys, “And if we left, they would come?”

“Theoretically.” you shift on your feet a little bit, not liking how the sand feels under the boots very much.

“Or stay hidden in the treeline.” Finnick adds, Johanna nods.

“Which in just over four hours will be soaked with water from the ten o’clock wave.” he looks around you guys, “Then what happens at midnight?”

Katniss answers this time, “Lightning strikes that tree.”

“Here’s what I propose,” Beetee starts, “We leave the beach at dusk.” he points, “We head to the lightning tree, that should draw them back to the beach. Prior to midnight, we then run this wire–” he motions to it, and then goes back out to pointing, “–from the tree, to the water. Anyone in the water, or the damp sand, will be electrocuted.’

You watch as Beetee and Peeta both feel the sand in their fingers.

“How do we know that the wire’s not going to burn up?” Johanna asks.

“Because I invented it.” he says, “I assure you, it won’t burn up.”

He looks around at you guys, clearly looking for input.

You look at Finnick, raising your eyebrows somewhat, and then the both of you look to Johanna. She has the same look at you do, the one that says ‘it can’t hurt’. What else are you guys going to do?

You can see Katniss is staring at you three curiously, almost like she can’t believe that you all just did that. That not only can you share a look like that with Finnick and completely understand what he’s thinking, but you can do it with Johanna too. You all think alike here, Katniss and Peeta just haven’t reached that level of friendship just yet, you suppose.

“Well, it’s better than hunting them down.” Johanna says.

“What else are we gonna do?” you cross your arms, shifting in the sand again.

Katniss turns to look at Peeta and Beete, “Yeah, why not? If it fails, no harm done anyway.”

Peeta nods, “Alright, I say we try it.”

“So what can we do to help?” Finnick asks.

Beetee pauses for a moment before answering, “Keep me alive for the next six hours? That would be extremely helpful.”

Beetee lists off the rest of the plan, and since you guys are waiting until dusk, it seems like there’s a lot of time to pass. You all sort of split up, Peeta and Katniss sit farther away, Beetee sits on his coil of wire, talking to Johanna about the plan.

You decided to go for a swim in the water after you pulled off your boots. The second you did when you were deep enough was pull out the hair tie that’s holding your ponytail in. You got all your hair wet, and scrubbed your scalp even if there’s no soap. When you were satisfied, you tied all of it back as smoothly as possible, right back into a ponytail again.

Finnick spins around his trident. Above his head, around his back. You eventually got bored of swimming and sat next to him while he messed around. To fill the silence, you two talked about what it would be like to be back home right now, watching. If neither you or Finnick had been an option for the games.

“What would you name our baby?” Finnick asks, slowing down his spinning.

You look over to him, “Depends on the gender.”

He gives you a certain look for that answer, “Okay, a girl?”

You shrug, “I don’t know, I haven’t given it much thought. Have you?”

Finnick smiles a little bit, “Ever since you brought it up.”

You nod a little bit, “It would have to relate back to the ocean in some way, or at least sounds like it belongs to the water.”

“So, Finn?” he suggests.

You laugh, “That would be a nightmare to deal with.”

“Oceana?”

“Classic, real classic.” you stand up, tired of sitting in the water, “I’ll put that right up there with ‘coral’.”

Finnick stops spinning the trident, placing it down in the sand. You go over to him, wrapping your arms around his chest while you give him a quick kiss.

“What about Delmore?” you suggest.

“Delmore?” he asks, almost like he’s about to tell you that your suggestion is ridiculous.

“It means ‘of the sea’.” you tell him, moving away.

Finnick nods, thinking about it.

“Beetee says it’s time we start heading to the tree.” Johanna says to you two.

“Sounds good to us,” you look at her, and then your eyes flicker to Katniss and Peeta, “Good luck with those two.”

She laughs, a small smirk coming on her face, “Alright, lovebirds!”

You all start heading back to the sand. You slip on your shoes in the water, making sure that no sand gets inside of them. Finnick goes back to spinning his trident in the meantime.

Peeta and Katniss get up soon enough, and you all start heading across the arena, walking through the beach, rather than the cornucopia. Along the way, Beetee will occasionally ramble on about his plan, but it’s mostly quiet.

The jungle is when the real problem starts, since you’re climbing over rocks, going nothing but uphill. Finnick leads the way on this one, and you follow just behind him. It seems like none of you realize how late it is, until the anthem begins, showing off the fallen.

You stumble to catch your footing when you turn to see, and Finnick saves you before you end up on your ass.

The first two are Cashmere and Gloss, respectively. Wiress follows, and then it’s the girl from District Five, the girl morphling from six that had saved Peeta apparently, Blight, the guy from ten, and then Chaff.

The anthem ends there, and you all turn and go back to making it up the hill in silence.

When you finally get to the tree, you all stop to stare at it, with Beetee up front.

“Minimal charring, impressive conductor. Let’s get started.” he goes towards the tree, and you guys loosely follow.

He starts to wrap the wire around the tree. In the meantime, you all just kind of stand around and wait. Every now and then, you’ll find a place to pace, not really wanting to be huddled up next to everybody. However, paranoia creeps back onto you, and you’ll head back over to Finnick.

It’s a while before Beetee’s even cracked a dent on the damn coil, “Typically, a lightning strike contains five billion volts of energy.”

You spin the knife in your hand, trying to keep your mind entertained. You don’t really want to be the only one here suffering of boredom or sleep deprivation. Considering that none of them have slept in a good while, either.

“We don’t want to be anywhere in the vicinity when this hits.”

You all begin to move away from the giant tree, Beetee pulling it in the direction you guys came. Then, he looks to you, Johanna and Katniss.

“You girls go together now, take this.” Beetee hands off the wire to Katniss, “Unspool it carefully, make sure the entire coil is in the water, you understand? Then head to the tree at the two o’clock center, we’ll meet you there.”

Katniss looks completely confused, looking between you and Johanna. You stop spinning the knife for a moment, waiting for her to protest what’s going on.

It comes from Peeta first, “I’m going to go with them as a guard.”

“No, you’re staying here to protect me.” Beetee then adds, “And the tree.”

“It’s an even split.” you tell Peeta, “Johanna and I have it covered.”

“No, I need to go with her.” he shakes his head.

“There are two careers out there, I need two guards.” Beetee argues.

“Finnick and (Y/n) can protect you just fine.”

Katniss now butts in, “Yeah, why can’t Finnick and (Y/n) protect you, and Peeta, Johanna and I take the coil?”

“You all agreed to keep me alive until midnight, correct?” Beetee moves in closer.

“It’s his plan, we all agreed to it,” Johanna says.

Finnick is next, “Is there a problem, here?”

“Excellent question.” Beetee tilts his head, waiting for an answer.

It’s a moment, before Katniss answers, “No, there’s no problem.”

As Katniss goes to say goodbye, you look to Finnick, “I’ll be back soon.”

“Don’t get yourself hurt.” he says.

“No promises.” you smile, and then head towards Johanna, ready to go.

“Alright, let’s go.” Johanna tells her.

You follow Johanna down the path, still playing with your knife. Just as you predicted on your first day here, the jungle is an absolute nightmare during the night. It’s dark, it’s hard to see, which means that you won’t know if something dangerous is around you.

You barely have the moon to thank for the stuff you can see.

Every now and then, you’ll take Katniss’ bow for her so she can step down a particularly steep spot, since she’s the one pulling the wire. You hand the bow back to her.

“Come on.” Johanna says, stepping onto a rock that overlooks the beach, “I want to put as much distance between me and this beach as possible. Frying is not how I want to go.”

“Not a fan of being scrambled?” you tease.

You and her stop when you don’t hear Katniss moving anymore. This is when you can see that the wire is pulled tight, obviously stuck on something.

“There’s something…” Katniss mutters quietly, tucking on the wire.

The wire tugs back, and it snaps. You move out of the way for Johanna, keeping an eye on the careers. Brutus is the first to pop up.

Johanna hits Katniss over the head with the wire. Katniss falls on her back, clearly out of it now. Johanna moves in with the knife, cutting open Katniss’ arm as planned to get the tracker out. Katniss screams in pain, and normally that wouldn’t be very helpful, but in this case it is.

It’s making it look like Johanna just hurt Katniss, which will throw Brutus and Enobaria off of her. They won’t think to go and kill off Katniss, especially if she’s supposed to be ‘suffering’ at the moment. They’ll expect her to die off in a couple of minutes.

Johanna lightly shushes Katniss, and places her bloody hands against Katniss’ neck, “Stay down.”

Johanna gives you a look, and you extend the sword, staring straight at Enobaria and Brutus. Johanna throws her spare axe, hitting the rocks next to them, and then takes off. You watch and make sure that they don’t come towards you, and instead they chase after Johanna.

Once you’re sure they’re gone, you collapse the sword again. Katniss stares at you with wide eyes, clearly not knowing what to take of the situation. You press your fingers to your lips to keep her quiet as you listen for any footsteps.

You then take off to go up the hill but not where the rocks are. It’s hard for a moment, but you stab and pull your way up the dirt with the knife.

“(Y/n)?” Finnick yells.

“Here!” you yell back, and he comes out of the trees to see you.

He helps you up the rest of the way.

“Enobaria and Brutus are after Johanna.”

He leads the way as you two look around for Johanna. However, you guys come upon nothing. The sound of a cannon worries you slightly, as you know that’s signaling someone’s demise.

At the sound of Katniss screaming, you and Finnick begin to head towards where it’s coming from. Finnick is much faster than you are with running, but you manage to just barely keep on his heels.

You nearly slam into his body when he stops so suddenly, “Katniss, where are you?”

You find her in the bushes with an arrow pointed at Finnick. You move in front of him. He realizes where she stands after that.

“Katniss,” he starts, holding out his arms like it’s a surrender, “Remember who the real enemy is.”

Your eyes are locked on her arrow, and you’re instantly relieved when she begins to lower the bow. The midnight storm brews above you, causing her to look at it suddenly. You relax, moving out of the way of Finnick.

Katniss turns to look behind her, staring straight at Beetee. He’s just laying in the dirt, you take a step forward.

What happened?

The lightning overhead begins to get a little louder, “Katniss, get away from the tree.” you tell her.

She wraps the wire around the head of the arrow, and Finnick takes off to grab her, “Katniss, get away from that tree–!”

Just as the lightning comes down, Katniss sends the arrow flying up towards the ceiling of the arena. When the lightning hits the tree, she’s sent flying away from it, the same time you and Finnick are.

The air is static. The type that makes your hair stick up, The electricity is lingering in the air around the tree.

The arrow hits the dome, sending the facade of a blue sky to black, as it slowly starts to spread throughout the rest of the arena with a fire-like border in front of it.

Your ears are ringing from the sound of the blast. You’re just barely able to move yourself around, not completely paralyzed by the electricity that had flown at you. You watch as the ceiling begins to fall apart, and the greenery around you turns to flame.

The ground shakes with each part that hits the arena, almost like an earthquake.

It’s a minute before the hovercraft appears, lowering a bit into the arena. It sends it’s claw down, heading straight for Katniss. You watch as it scoops her up and brings her in, and then it��s sent down again.

You’re curious on who it’s going to next, you, Finnick or Beetee. But then you realize it’s Finnick, and you can kill two birds with one stone by joining him.

You drag yourself over to him, trying your best to crawl but it’s not working just yet. Your muscles seem to have turned to jelly from the electricity, they’re absolutely useless.

You throw yourself on Finnick. He looks awake, and he tells you that he isn’t able to move. You position yourself on his chest the best you can, telling him that it’s okay.

The claw picks the both of you up, bringing you to the hovercraft. You place your head on Finnick’s chest, squeezing your eyes shut because you don’t want to look down. You don’t want to see how far you are into the air.

It’s quickly over though, you’re greeted with Haymitch, who helps pull you, and then Finnick off of the claw. You tell him that Beetee is down there too, but you don’t know where Johanna and Peeta are. Or if they’re even alive, because of the cannon.

“Use that knife and get out the trackers.” he tells you, motioning to your belt.

You look down, confused on what he’s on about. Staring right back at you is the knife that was sponsored to you. You hadn’t even realized that you had put it there.

You focus on getting Finnick’s out first. You roll up his sleeve and place your knee on his upper arm to keep him from moving. Then, with your left hand, you hold down his wrist.

You quickly dig the tracker out, which causes a commotion with Finnick, and then hand it over to Plutarch so it can be stomped on. You do the same to yourself, closing your eyes and taking a deep breath before you stab, and twist. You don’t stop on that arm though, you go ahead and do it on the other one, too.

Both trackers are out, and you push it towards Plutarch, watching as he steps on them. Haymitch then pulls Beetee in, and they call it a wrap. Peeta wasn’t the goal of this, it was always Katniss.

Finnick is able to feel his legs again soon after, and you all move to the back. Where Finnick changes into a robe, and you do too. The both of you stand around a table with Haymitch and Plutarch.

“So, where are we heading?” you ask, looking between them.

Plutarch answers, “District Thirteen.”

[fromcrossroadstoking]

Timid Hearts

Sisk and Roe throughout the war. Because I`m very soft for them.

(This is probably the longest thing I`ve ever written.)

Tags: @gottapenny @itisjustmethistime @indigosandviolets 

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Right now some lucky bastard's headed for the South Pacific. He'll get billeted on some tropical island. Sitting under a palm tree with six naked native girls helping him cut up coconuts so he can hand feed them to the flamingos."

"Flamingos are mean. They bite."

"So do the naked native girls."

I wonder if Cajun boys bite too.

With that thought, Sisk stole a quick glance towards the dark haired man sitting a few cots down, reading through a small field medical manual for what Sisk thought must've been the thousandth time. A small shiver shot through his spine as he considered what it would be like to have the other man's teeth drag across his skin, nipping at all the most sensitive spots.

Unfortunately, before his imagination could get much further, a fight broke out right in front of him between Liebgott and Guarnere.

~

Roe could swear he felt a pair of eyes on him. It had become a strangely familiar feeling and he was certain that it was almost always one man. He had caught Sisk staring several times already; his eyes would be locked on Roe like he was trying to study him, figure him out, memorize him. Roe usually brushed it off, only offering a polite smile in return. If he thought about it too much he might have to admit to feelings he didn't have time for. 

He dutifully tried to ignore Sisk, tried to concentrate on the slim medic manual he had been given back in Toccoa. Roe hadn't asked to be a medic. When he joined the paratroopers he had done so expecting to jump out of a plane, gun in hand, to fight Nazis. But then the army had taken his gun and handed him a crisp white armband adorned with a blood red cross. And just like that he was a medic, responsible for saving lives, not taking them. A small bubble of fear that he wouldn't be good enough, that he would let his company down, that men would die because of mistakes he made, began to rise and Roe did his best to swallow it back down.

A commotion a couple bunks down near Sisk (of course it had to be in that direction) forced Roe's eyes away from his book and his thoughts. Liebgott and Guarnere brawling, what a surprise. Roe rolled his eyes and tried to refocus. He had a feeling Easy Company wasn't going to make his job as a medic easy and he wanted to be as prepared as possible when they finally met the enemy face to face.

~

Most men enjoyed their time in England and the small bits of freedom and fun they had exploring a new country. Roe, however, seemed indifferent to the whole thing. Or at least that's the impression that Sisk got as he watched Roe do almost nothing but continue to study that damn book every chance he got. I bet I could distract him from that goddamn book real good. If I had the guts to actually do anything.

While he harbored some secret fantasy of ripping the book out of Roe's hands and dragging him in to a quiet dark corner where he could show Roe just what he was missing out on, it was never going to happen and Sisk knew it. Truth be told, Sisk had hardly managed to get beyond the occasional "Hi Doc". Oh, he had come up with a thousand ideas of different ways to get Roe's attention, or start a conversation. But in all this time, he had only implemented one, admittedly lame, plan: place himself in Roe's line of sight frequently enough that Roe might actually notice him.

The plan was dumb as dirt, but Sisk stuck to it. After all, he hadn't managed to gather up enough courage to do anything else yet. Part of him liked to think he was getting very good at his ridiculous plan, almost making an art out of it. He always made sure to never be more than one or two people away from Roe during formations, always found a way to snag a seat at a table in front of Roe during meals, always happened to find an excuse to be in the same area as Roe. Still he had been unable to hold Roe's attention or induce him to start a conversation and with their impending jump in to the war looming ever closer, Sisk worried he was running out of time. 

He was right.

~

In some ways, Roe was glad to finally be jumping in to Normandy. The waiting had been its own kind of torture. It gave him too much time to think. It seemed all he did in England was think about what was coming - the blood, the screams, the deaths, the men relying on him to keep them alive. Now that they were finally on the plane, flying over the cold, dark blue of the ocean, Roe found that his mind was miraculously only occupied with the thought of his chute, silently praying for no malfunctions.

As the plane began to soar over Normandy, the sounds of war became very real and very loud. The plane shook as antiaircraft fire exploded all around them. Roe squeezed his eyes shut and begged his mind to think of something else, anything else. His mind complied by offering up, of all things, Skinny Sisk. Sisk, who always seemed to be where Roe was, who always offered up a "Hi Doc" full of enough warmth to seem like he was genuinely pleased to see him every time. Handsome, quiet Sisk who Roe had been so careful to keep his distance from, who now sat in another plane somewhere in the explosion filled skies of Normandy. An ugly ball of fear and regret began to form in his gut and Roe's eyes snapped open. Just in time to see the light flick on, signaling for them to get ready to jump.

~

With the adrenaline of the jump and the initial fighting wearing off, Sisk found he was exhausted in a way he had never been before. It had been several sleepless days battling his way through Normandy`s hedgerows and Sisk was now so tired that even his fingers and toes hurt. Curled in a shallow trench between Liebgott and Smokey, Sisk was just barely conscious of his eyes slowly drifting closed.

~

Roe finally found the rest of Easy. After stumbling around fields and forests with nothing but a prayer and a small pair of scissors to defend himself, he had made his way to a small aid station set up in a church by a couple of other medics. He had stayed there for a couple of days, diligently helping the wounded, before the itch to find his own company had become downright overwhelming. He had set out immediatley and reached Easy Company not long after. He could feel the flood of relief as soon as he set his eyes on his company. They were scattered about a makeshift camp, exhausted and dirty looking. He quietly took a visual inventory of everyone, those who were there and their injuries, and made a mental note of those who weren't there. As his eyes scanned the company, they fell on Sisk and a second, unexpected, wave of relief hit Roe. Sisk was fast asleep, head leaning on Liebgott's shoulder, seemingly uninjured. Roe couldn't help the small smile that flicked across his face.

~

Sisk was pretty sure the last time he had seen a genuine, full of honest-to-goodness happiness, smile on Roe's face must have been at the very beginning of the Holland operation. He was having a hard time pinpointing a single time he had seen that brighter-than-the sun smile since then, as he sat there in his cold dirt hole in the woods of Bastogne.

Oh wait. Spina.

Roe’s face had lit up like a goddamn Christmas tree when Spina had joined the company. And although he understood why Roe had been so excited to finally have another medic around, that knowledge did nothing to smooth out the knot of jealousy suddenly lodged in Sisk's heart. The knot grew tighter every time he saw Spina effortlessly command Roe's attention, every time he saw them chatting like old friends, every time he saw Roe settle in to Spina's foxhole for the night. He was being an idiot and he knew it. He had no reason to be jealous, it wasn't like he and Roe were together. Hell, they had never even really talked to each other beyond polite conversation. And besides, Roe more than deserved to finally have a friend in this godawful war. Sisk just really wished it had been him.

It's my own damn fault. I coulda just talked to him when I had a chance. Coulda been friends.

Sisk crossed his arms over his chest and huffed. He was cranky, hungry, cold, and absolutely miserable. He was also damn tired of Perconte's never-ending teeth brushing. His eyes darted over to his foxhole companion, who was vigorously brushing away. Again.

Swear to God, I`m gonna steal that damn toothbrush while he`s not looking and smash it into a million goddamn pieces.

His thoughts were interrupted by a third man suddenly jumping in to their hole, half landing on top of Sisk's legs. Sisk watched, speechless, as Roe upended Perconte's things and stole the pair of scissors Perconte had squirreled away. Perconte's feathers were incredibly ruffled by the proceedings and he made no attempt to hide it. It was one of the most satisfying things Sisk had witnessed in a while. He attempted to say something clever to that effect but before he could get a single word out, Roe had already leaped out of the hole and headed back on his way.

~

Roe raced towards the call for a medic. As he neared the source, his heart stopped as his eyes took in the sight of a bloody Sisk writhing in pain. He jumped down next to him and, calmly as he could, examined Sisk's wounded leg. It didn't appear to be all that bad and he tried to reassure Sisk of that fact as Perconte called for a jeep. He must have done a half decent job of being reassuring, because Sisk seemed to relax a bit and even refused morphine. The briefest of pauses followed Sisk's refusal where Roe had to fight back the sudden overwhelming urge to plant a kiss on Sisk's forehead and wrap his arms tightly around the other man. 

He quickly blinked and refocused on the task at hand.

~

The aid station was far more crowded than Sisk had imagined it to be. But it was relatively warm and there was alcohol. So, not all bad. He even managed to make a joke about it that pulled a brief smile from Doc. Sisk felt a small bubble of pride and satisfaction at his small accomplishment, that was quickly, viciously, popped as Roe walked away without a single word.

~

With the war in Europe over, Roe found he unfortunately had plenty of time to think again. But instead of being preoccupied by thoughts of war like he had been before Easy had entered the fray and during the subsequent months, Roe was now unable to turn his mind away from one particular man. As he sat in the sunshine next to Spina, who was babbling away about something or other, Roe quietly tried to shove down another wave of remorse.

Guilt had been chewing at Roe's conscience for weeks now. It had plagued the back of his mind through the rest of Bastogne, straight through Hagenau, right on through to their present position near Hitler's beloved Eagle's Nest.

I didn't say a word. Not even a goodbye. Just left him there. Goddammit.

The puddle of regret Roe had felt when he first wordlessly left Sisk at the aid station, had deepened into an ocean when Sisk rejoined the company. He had returned only a few days later but nothing had been right after that.

Roe had noticed it immediately. Sisk, who had always been in the peripheral of Roe`s vision, was suddenly nowhere to be found. He was no longer simply popping up wherever Roe went. The warm "Hi Doc"s were replaced by quiet nods of acknowledgment whenever they happened to pass. Roe's world suddenly felt empty in a way he hadn't expected and it hurt in a way he couldn't describe in words.

Without being fully conscious of it, he began to mimic Sisk's former behavior. He kept trying to catch Sisk's eye, he sat across from him at meals, attempted to start conversations but never really got past "Hey Sisk? Doing alright?". Roe began to feel desperate.

~

Sisk had resolved to give up that day at the aid station as he watched Roe walk away. The resolution was painful but necessary. He couldn't be lovesick forever over someone who clearly had no interest. And now here he was, heartbroken and stuck in a jeep with a bickering Liebgott and Webster.  How he wished Webster would just shut up and get over it. One way or another, the Nazi that had been holed up in the little house was dead and there was nothing Webster could do about it now. Besides, there was no arguing with a pissed off Liebgott. Webster really should know that by now.

Silence fell between the men as they reached Easy Company. Webster jumped out of the jeep before it had even come to a full stop and Sisk moved to follow him.

"Hey!"

A hand grabbed Sisk`s sleeve just as he was jumping out of the vehicle, almost knocking him off balance. He shot an irritated look towards Liebgott who maintained a firm hold on his shirt.

"I wanna talk to you. Come on."

Sisk let out an irritated sigh and rolled his eyes for the millionth time that day but obediently followed the older man as he walked over to a quiet garden area behind one of the houses.

"What's your deal?"

"What?"

"Don't be an asshole. Something's wrong with you. Has been for a while. You went from a bouncy little puppy to a puppy that looks like it's been kicked around. So what is it?"

"Nothing. The war. You know how it is."

"Fuck you. Don't lie to me. You're fucking bad at it." There was a brief pause before Liebgott added, "It's Roe, ain't it?"

Terror filled Sisk and he froze like a deer caught in headlights.

"Fuck. Calm down. I'm your best goddamn friend. You think I wouldn't fucking notice? Fuck. Sit your ass down. We're gonna talk."

Sisk sat, his mind still trying to catch up with what was happening. Before he knew it, he was telling Liebgott everything, every last detail. Because Liebgott was right. He was his best friend and if Sisk couldn't tell him, then he couldn't tell anyone. And it felt good too, to finally let someone in on his years long secret. 

By the end of it, Liebgott was close to kicking Sisk's ass.

"Of course, nothing fucking happened between the two of you! Doc ain't a fucking mind reader! You can't stare him into having a fucking crush! Fuck!"

~

Roe was quietly organizing supplies in a small room he had claimed as his own. The war was over and Roe finally had enough medical supplies. Hell, he was damn near drowning in medical supplies! Anger flared up as he thought about just what he would have done to have these supplies only months earlier. Roe took a deep breath and tried to calm down. What had happened, had happened, and there was nothing to be done about it now. Just as his emotions were starting to smooth back out, a familiar voice filled the room, and Roe's heart was back to doing somersaults.

"Hey, uh, Doc? You have a second?"

Roe's words escaped him for a moment as he looked at Sisk shifting nervously on his feet in the doorway.

"'Course. You alright?"

"Yeah, yeah I'm alright. I just need to talk to you about something."

"I'm sorry." Roe blurted out the words before he could stop himself. Sisk stared at him for a moment, seemingly caught off guard by the sudden apology. "I didn't say goodbye or anything back at the aid station and I should've. I should've said something. And I didn't. I mean, there was a lot I wanted to say but I didn't know how so I didn't say anything and that ain't an excuse but I`m sorry." 

Roe could feel himself starting to ramble, nerves getting the better of him, and managed to stop talking.

"Oh. Well. I have a lot I've wanted to say too. For a long time. Just didn't know how either."

The two men stood in a silence that seemed to stretch on for too long. Roe had never been good at expressing himself with words and after everything that happened during the war, he had only become worse at it.

"Fuck. Okay. Look, Gene, I like you. A lot. More than a lot. Fuck. I just, fuck... I want to be more than friends and I'm really hoping you feel the same. And well, I don't know, that's it I guess. Jesus. Fuck."

~

Roe was staring at him, eyes wide. 

When did I start saying fuck so much? Maybe I`ve been spending too much time with Lieb. Dammit.

An odd mix of panic and relief began to set in after his less than smooth confession. Relief that it was finally over with, panic that his feelings wouldn't be reciprocated.

His alarm slowly melted away as he watched Roe's face soften and the corners of his mouth turn up.

~

An honest to God smile spread across Roe's face as a weight he didn't realize he had been carrying for so very long lifted off of his shoulders. He covered the space between himself and Sisk in only a couple of steps. Grabbing the front of Sisk's jacket, he pulled the other man in to an intense, hungry kiss. He broke off the kiss only long enough to get out a soft "me too". He gently lead Sisk in to the room, closing the door behind him. Leaning forward to press his lips against Sisk's once more, he could feel the other man smile into the kiss, as the two stumbled further in to the room. They had three years to catch up on and both men wordlessly decided they had no more time to waste.

[caroline18mars]

A Man On Fire - Chapter 41

He was professional enough to tease and play with the crowd, but also naïve enough to try and look for her in that same mass of people in front of him, he couldn't find her, he kept looking to the side of the stage, no, nothing..the only thing waiting there for him as he got off stage was depression, she was gone, she had meant it, she couldn't be far, this was her country, the place she was born in. Maybe he should contact her parents? Or maybe she'd already killed them..oh god, what a disaster, all day he had felt like he was missing a limb, a vital part of his body, being without her was unbearable. There was a knock on the door, or was it just her imagination? Go away, whoever you are, just leave me alone, I'm not interested..she closed her eyes again and somewhere in the distance it sounded like a door was opening. “Coco..” she heard a gasp and running footsteps. She felt icecold and barely alive, he felt her pulse, slow and a little erratic “Coco? Hey? Harper?” he pushed her hair out of her face and tapped her cheek, thank god, she blinked a couple of times. Harper looked up and saw the face of a man doom up in the darkness above her, “S..Sean?” she stammered with a gasp, “how..what..are you doing here?”, he knelt down and pulled her upper body on his knee “I've still got your key, remember? I heard a noise in your apartment and came to check it out”. She kept shivering but when he wanted to put his arms under her to pick her up, she protested “go away..just go away..I don't need you”, but despite her protest she felt herself being lifted and carried over to her couch. “Stay put, I'll get you something to drink” he ignored what she said as he put her down and walked over to the fridge, ok water was all that was left, it would have to do. “Here..just sit up” he held the glass to her lips and let her take a few sips, “now..wanna tell me what happened? Where's Jared?” he put the glass down and let her sink back into the cushion. Harper's eyes burned dangerously “still in Europe, what do you care?” she closed her eyes in pain, “Harper..I care, alright? I care about you” he put his hand on her forehead, she was feverish. “Oh of course you do, you care so much, you tried to kill me! You were gonna destroy all my paintings, yeah you care alright” she huffed and swatted his hand away, “I did not try to kill you, it was a stupid accident! And did I destroy any of your stuff? That was just talk, I was angry” he rattled as he pointed at all her paintings that were all still intact. “Oh I get it, I should be grateful that you didn't trash it then? Just get the fuck out of my apartment” she growled, “no” was all he said, refusing to move, “Sean, I'm jetlagged, I'm miserable, and I refuse to let you stay and gloat, you can go and do that at your own place, so just leave and save me the wrath of your lovely girlfriend, look at it from the positive side, maybe you can call Leto and both of you can get your job back”.Sean sat down and his voice dropped “Shayla..and I..we're not together anymore”, why was he sitting down? Just go away, loser! “and what? I've got to feel sorry for you now? D'you know what? You go feel sorry for yourself in your own place and I'll feel sorry for myself right here on my own! How 'bout that? JUST LEAVE, Sean!”

Not in the crowd, not backstage, not in this stupid fuckin' hotel, not with her parents, not out somewhere walking the empty, nightly streets, what time was it? One second closer to utter despair, that's what time it was. GODDAMMIT! He jumped as his phone started ringing, huh? Anonymous call? If this is a marketing call, I swear I'll rip someone's head off. “Hello” he barked, “Jared?..it's Sean..”, fuck, what did that asshole want? “I'm sorry Sean, now is not the time, it's early here” he brushed him off, “no..wait..I'm calling 'cause..well, it's Harper”. Hearing her name stopped his heart “where is she? Is she ok?” he breathed, please don't let her be with that fucker, please no, nonono, didn't matter where that asshole was in Europe, he would be there in a heartbeat to come and snatch her away from him. “New York, home, and she's far from ok” Sean sighed in his ear, WHAT? NEW YORK!? God no! “Are you with her now? Let me talk to her!” cold sweat ran down his back, it was over, really over, if she felt like they had a chance she would not have gone back to the States. “I just left her apartment, she basically kicked me out, she doesn't want to talk or see anyone, I found her curled up on a cold floor, she lashes out at everything and everyone she sees..”, just thinking about Sean reaching out to his lover, which she still was and always would be, was nauseating. “You listen to me, Sean, if you lay one finger on her I swear I will hunt you down, you hear me?!” his voice deep and thunderous, “Jared, come on man, I know I did some stupid things, but I would never hurt her, alright? I know what you both think, but none of that is true..I love her”. Those last three words made his breath hitch in his throat, “I did not just hear that” he groaned and pinched the bridge of his nose, this was getting way too much, “as a friend, Jared..I love Harper as my best friend..I think it's fair to say we both have her best interest at heart” Sean lied, of course he was still in love with her, he had always been and that would never change, but if he put up a front now and looked after Jared's number one, then he might just give him his job back. Getting his job back, meant getting back on the road, meant being around Harper again..win-win, right? And so what if it took time to get close to her again? He had time, he had lots of time and in the meantime he would be his own serial dating self again, simple really, throw up a smoke screen and wait on your prey, perfect plan. “I'll go back over in ten minutes, when she's calmed down a bit” he had to trust Sean, he was his only option to get hold of her, “ok, just call me when you do, and let her talk to me, alright?”, Sean tried to sound all serious and understanding, but deep inside he didn't give a flying fuck about Jared's feelings, that fuckin' dickhead deserved every single bit of misery he was in. “Count on it, you try and calm down a little as well, alright? I'll take care of everything here” he softly said with a big grin on his face, I know how to handle her, which button to push, just one step to the destruction of this stupid alliance between you and her at a time.

”What the hell are you doing?” Shannon watched his brother push his stuff in one of his duffel bags “you're leaving? You can't leave..”. Jared just shrugged and dove into the bathroom to get some of his toiletries without even looking at his brother “Yes I can and I am, we've got a gap of two days, I've got a flight to NY in an hour, I'll be back in time, don't worry”. Shannon knew that no matter what he said, he wouldn't be able to change his brother's mind “you always put your job first, you would never let anyone come between that, what changed?” he sighed and leaned against the doorframe. Jared stopped with what he was doing and turned his head, locking eyes with him “Harper happened, that's what changed, she's more important to me than..anything! I don't care about the fame or the money..I'd give it all it up in an instant..I just need her”. Shannon quickly looked at his feet, so Jared wouldn't see the dramatic eyeroll “fine, you do whatever you please, but if you're not back in time, I'm never talking to you again! I never thought you would let some girl sabotage our dream” he shuffled towards the door “she's not sabotaging..” but his words got caught in the slamming door “..anything”. Thousands miles across the ocean, there was another knock on the door before she heard her name “Harper?” come right in, why don't you? “I told you to stay away, Sean” she slowly blinked another tear away, stop showing that fucker how you feel. “No can do, sorry!” he casually walked in with a few pizzaboxes and plopped them on the table, before he dangled a six pack of beer in front of her, “pizza and beer will always mend a broken heart”. She eyed him until he sat down, who the hell gave him permission to even be here? “No, it won't! Take all that stuff and get the hell out and stay out” she growled at him, she no longer had  the strength to be polite. He completely ignored her, opened the first pizzabox and pulled open a can of beer “if you get hungry or you want to talk or both..I'm right here” he slurped up the string of cheese as he took a bite from a pizzaslice “this pizza is absolutely delish, funghi, your favorite”. No reaction..ah well he had time, he had all the time in the world, what better way to spend your evening, pizza, beer, a comfy seat, and all the time in the world to admire her, she was the most gorgeous, sad little sulker, she was almost as yummy as this pizza.

Check-ins, boarding passes, flight attendants, thousands cups of tea, water, safety instructions, clouds, miles and miles that disappeared under him, the older he got the more he dreaded traveling but whenever Coco was concerned, he would fly around the world twice and go through all this shit all over again, if it meant that he could be with her then he would do it all. The 'fasten seatbealt' light above his head went out with the typical 'ping', finally, he unclasped the belt and reached for his phone in his jacket, opened a new mail and his fingers started whizzing over the screen.

From: BJLCubbins

To: HCDeRobiano

Subject: 'Love letters of great men and women'

Remember that book you were reading when we first met? I was just thinking that you and I were in the middle of writing a beautiful love letter ourselves as well, and we both know we're not finished with it. I don't ever wanna finish it, I want to keep writing the letter with you every day, this is a phase, a rough patch, nothing permanent, I made a mistake and I'm willing to rectify it, as long as you let me. I love you, and I always will, like the song goes: I knew I loved you before I met you, and that's not some stupid cliché, it's the truth.

Take a deep breath, try to see things in perspective, accept my apologies and call me, for crying out loud, just call me, I NEED YOU!

Yours for eternity

Jay

He hesitated for a second, no he wasn't gonna tell her that he was on his way, he didn't want to run the risk of her not even bothering to open the door or slamming it in his face..no, not an option, so he quickly hit 'send'.

Harper kept eyeing Sean as he stuffed a second slice of pizza in his mouth, so he wasn't leaving, not even after a couple of threats..and she was so hungry..slowly she tried to sit up and reached for the box before curling up into fetal position again, taking a slow bite, tears didn't stop rolling, they wouldn't stop anytime soon she knew that, she just needed just a little bit of energy...for the biggest blow that was still to come, she dreaded tomorrow morning when she would wake up and realize that it hadn't been a dream, that the nightmare was real.

[bangtaninink]

another summer day 

two eight year olds grasp flowers tightly in their fists. it’s the middle of july, and they’re running around the field, watching petals fly off, trailing behind them. 

“yoongi!” one cries out, laughing as she calls out to the boy running ahead of her. “yoongi, i’m getting dizzy!” 

yoongi falls to the grass, clutching his stomach as he laughs heartily, the sky above him spinning. 

“these are for you,” he says, holding the remnants of the flowers up above his head, now just petal-less stems. 

“you’re an idiot.” 

“what’s wrong? what happened? who hurt you?” concern is written all over yoongi’s face, watching as tears leave tracks down your cheeks, drops falling from your chin. 

“i’m... i’m leaving,” you say, words interrupted by sobs. 

“what? what do you mean, leaving? where’re you going?” 

“far.” 

“far, like... like, seoul?” he asks. 

“no, far. like, over the ocean,” you say. it hurts to say it out loud, to let it manifest into fact instead of letting it remain as an idea. 

“wh-- no. no, you can’t go. you can’t leave me.” 

a hand calloused from numerous basketball drills holds one of your own tightly, squeezes around your fingers, eyes glazed over with sadness. 

“dad, he... he got a new j-job, and... now we... we’re all going.” yoongi, stubborn, shakes his head before you even finish. 

“no. no, i’ll... i’ll talk to your parents. i’ll tell them t-that you can stay here. with me. you can’t go, _____. we planned everything out already, remember? we... we’re gonna finish high school together, go to the same college. we’re gonna live next door to each other forever. remember?” 

your sobs get louder, and by the time yoongi is finished, you feel like you can barely breathe because of how hard you’re crying. you lean over to throw your hands around him, hold him close, and gradually, you start to feel the back of your shirt start to dampen, and not because of the heat of this summer night. 

silently, you watch your dad put your suitcase into the trunk of the taxi, standing on the sidewalk with yoongi beside you. you’ve kept a firm hold on the hem of his shirt since you’d stepped out of the house, and he holds an umbrella over the both of you to shield you and him from the summer rain. both your mothers are talking to each other; they’re looking very emotional -- they were childhood best friends too, after all -- and wordlessly, yoongi reaches for your hand, entwining your fingers together. 

“i think that’s about everything,” your dad says, reaching out to shake yoongi’s dad’s hand, bidding him goodbye. somewhere off to the side, you hear your mother and yoongi’s sniffle softly, and you can see them embrace out of the corner of your eye, but you pay no attention to either of your parents because you’re too busy staring at yoongi’s profile, desperately trying to memorise every curve and line of his face because you have no idea how long it’ll be before you see your best friend again. yoongi stares forward, too afraid to meet your eyes, because the both of you have shed too many tears because of this, and he doesn’t want to cry anymore. 

“you’ll stay in touch, right?” you ask, hating the way your voice shakes. 

“always.” 

yoongi is almost knocked over by the force of your embrace, but manages to catch himself in time to save the umbrella from tilting. he can feel you trembling when he wraps his free arm around you tightly, face hidden in your shirt, eyes shut tight as he wishes for this all to be one sick dream. 

your father calls your name, and instinct makes you tighten your hold on yoongi just a little more. 

“love you, cub,” you hear yoongi whisper in your ear, loud enough for only you to hear. 

“love you too, cub,” you return, teeth digging into your lip hard enough that you almost draw blood, desperately trying not to cry. 

you and yoongi lose contact. 

it’s inevitable, what with international calls wracking up crazy phone bills over time, letters getting lost in the mail, and too many changed addresses to keep track of. 

it hurts, it really fucking hurts to lose your best friend, to have no idea where or how they are. and in the deepest recesses of your mind, you still keep a piece of yoongi with you, where he lives as a part of your conscience, that little voice in the back of your head that helps you out when you need it most. 

it’s been over a decade when you’re travelling back to korea, to your homeland, but staying in seoul. it’s close enough, you think, seoul is closer to daegu than the myriad of countries you’ve had to bounce around, and this is a step forward you’ve been wanting to take for a long time. 

quiet whispers and vague conversations have told you that yoongi is here too, and he’s in the limelight now. ( you remember finding that out, the quiet chuckle you’d let out that night, knowing that he hated being the centre of attention, and how ironic life turned out to be; but then, you found yourself wondering if yoongi had changed since you’d last seen him, if maybe, somehow, he’d come to learn to love it. it scared you enough to lose sleep for a few days. ) 

it’d been by chance that an old classmate had found you online, linked you to the facebook page for the high school reunion for your class. you hadn’t gone, stuck on the other side of the world, but you’d refreshed and watched the page like a hawk long enough to know that yoongi hadn’t gone either. you’d searched the uploaded group photos for any signs of him and come up empty. it had taken two beers and a vodka cranberry for you to muster up the confidence to ask someone what yoongi was up to; they’d told you that no one had been able to contact him since the end of high school, when he’d left for seoul to pursue his music. it was hard, they told you, now that he was a big deal, a celebrity of all things. ( you shed happy tears after the conversation ended, overjoyed to learn that he’d still kept at it. ) 

your new job as a director’s assistant has you here, now, in your home country, and damn, does it feel good to be back. it’s been too hectic to find time to look yoongi up; you’ve spent too many late nights with director yang, helping him prepare for his up and coming project, a lot of overtime and extra hours under your belt that were dedicated to helping the crew get ready to leave los angeles. 

you have twenty minutes to set down your personal belongings in your hotel room before you’re being driven to the set; apparently, things are happening immediately. you’ve got folders in your arms, chatting away with director yang, going over memorised details and learning new ones. 

you know this: the crew will be filming a music video over the next three days. you’ve sat in with director yang for back and forth video calls with this band’s managers and bosses for the last three weeks. the band is made up of seven members. bangtan sonyeondan is their name, and you know nothing else about them except that the entire country loves them. this is, then, a big deal, having an international director be flown across the ocean to film a local act’s new video, and you’d be nervous if it wasn’t for the fact that you had no time to be. 

the crew has been given a short time frame of no less than five days to have the music video filmed, and a primary edit to be done and ready for presentation to the band and their management. it’s tough, and accounts heavily for director yang’s stress and unnatural snarky attitude, fuses too short to stay calm. even now in the hired car taking you to the set, you’re forced to repeat details you’ve already gone over with him because the crew is paranoid they’re going to mess something up. 

“pardon me. we’re arrived to the set,” the driver’s voice cuts in, interrupting a steadily escalating conversation over the camera equipment. 

“alright,” director yang says. “i’m sure i don’t have to remind you all of how big this is. our reputation rides on this. let’s be professional. let’s be good. let’s show the world what soleil productions can do.” 

the entire ocean of people on set turn their heads towards you where you stand frozen, folders and papers strewn across the floor where you’ve dropped them. 

“what the fuck?” one of the sound guys whispers harshly, elbowing you hard in the side. you barely even notice the pain because... 

“yoongi?” 

your old friend stands not even ten feet away from you, wearing the exact same look of shock and surprise as you. you hardly register the mix of scolding and hasty apologies around you because you’re walking forward, steps getting more urgent the closer you get; you watch yoongi shove someone aside ( you’re not sure if that’s a staff member or a band member yet ), hear him whisper a, get out of my fucking way, and it’s disgustingly cliche how it feels as if time stops the moment you both meet, arms wrapping around each other without a second thought, exasperated gasps leaving the both of you. 

“shit, shit, fuck, shit, fuck,” yoongi says, words rapid fire, holding onto you, your shirt held in his fist. “this is fucking real, right?” 

“holy fuck, it better be,” you say, laughing with disbelief, completely unaware of the tears that fall down your cheeks. 

“god. jesus fuck. god.” 

“hyung?” comes a nearby voice.

“fuck off, taehyung,” yoongi says, voice muffled by your shoulder. 

“hyung, you’re crying.” 

“cool. leave me alone.” 

“uh... okay.” 

with a soft chuckle, you pull back, but only just enough to get a good look at him. his eyes are rimmed slightly red, but he’s smiling that old gummy smile of his that you’ve so fucking missed. you don’t know where to look first, your hands with a mind of their own, reaching up to run the pads of your thumbs across his cheeks, his jaw, everywhere. his hair is dyed a deep shade of pink, and his makeup ( he wears makeup now? ) is starting to smudge and run because he’s crying. you probably look a sight yourself. 

“eleven y--” 

“don’t,” yoongi interrupts. “don’t remind me. not right now. god, i...” 

“excuse me, miss. i’m gonna have to ask you to step aside.” the both of you turn to look at the man who’s approached you, one hand firmly wrapped around your arm, thankfully not enough to hurt. yet. 

“what the hell, hyung? let go of her,” yoongi says, and it might have been eleven years since you last saw him, but you can still recognise his anger when you see it. “don’t touch her. don’t even talk to her like that. what the fuck?” 

“min yoongi, have you forgotten where you are? what you’re doing today?” 

“listen. that can wait. i haven’t seen _____ in fucking forever, okay? no one’s ripping her away from me again, understand? go micromanage jimin or something. i know he’s your favourite.” 

the muscles in the man’s jaw shift as he clenches his teeth, lips pressed in a tight line before he’s turning around to walk off, but not without a stern look over his shoulder directed at the both of you. 

“you’ve gotten angrier, i see,” you say, snorting quietly. “oh, yeah. i’ve embraced my inner hulk since we’ve been separated,” he replies. 

“that guy though... he was kinda right. we’re supposed to be working right now.” 

“pfft. no, screw that manager. he’s just salty because i beat him at poker the other night. don’t worry about him.” 

“but we do need to work.” 

simultaneously, as if to prove your point, both your names are called out from different ends of the room. yoongi sighs, and hangs his head, rubbing your arms gently. 

“fine,” he says. “the lunch break though. you’re all mine. we’re sitting together, okay?” 

“like i’d say no to that,” you reply, rolling your eyes and smiling. 

“cool.” yoongi leans forward to give you another hug. “god, it��s so fucking good to see you again, cub. you have no idea.” 

“i think i do, cub.” 

it’s no surprise that neither of you can keep your eyes off each other. 

it doesn’t take long for you to figure out who else is in yoongi’s group and who is a staff member under their management, but for the most part, you’re glued to director yang’s side most of the time as his right hand man. the day is filled with fleeting glances, weird expressions and funny faces from a distance, shy and apologetic smiles woven in between when you’re caught not doing your jobs. it’s interesting and entertaining to watch yoongi ( you learn his stage name is suga. how cute. ) completely change demeanour in front of the camera, and you take the brief opportunities to breathe to pull your phone out and do lightning fast google searches on his group. 

as it turns out, bangtan sonyeondan is a really big deal in korea, and their growing fanbase seems to expand every month, week, day even, with international prospects becoming more and more possible by the minute. 

“hey!” you’re quick to snap your head up, suddenly face to face with... jimin? “are you _____?” 

“uh... yeah, i am. jimin, right?” you return. 

“yeah! nice to meet you! like, really nice to meet you. yoongi hyung hasn’t shut up about you since i met him, and it’s nice to know you’re, like, an actually real person, and not just someone that lives in his head.” 

“oh... uh...” you have no idea how to reply to that, but it turns out you won’t have to because before you can think of something to say, jimin’s name is being called. 

“oh. i need to get back. but, yeah! it was nice meeting you, _____.” 

“y-yeah. you too, jimin-sshi.” a little confused, you watch him walk back, slinging his arm over another band member -- the one called v, you think -- and vaguely, you think you hear him say, “dude, that’s her.” you can’t be too sure, but the way v turns around to look back at you seems to confirm your suspicions. 

the first half of the day passes in a weird blur of too much information and things to take in. it isn’t long before the set is being filled with the scent of freshly cooked meat as the caterers start to set up along the far wall, ready to feed everyone. 

“oh my god, food,” someone says, running past you -- you’re almost eighty percent sure that was jeongguk. other band members call out after him, running too, ready to grab plates. 

“hey,” yoongi says, sidling up beside you. 

“hey yourself,” you reply, wrapping an arm around him as he wraps his around your shoulders. 

“that kid eats so much. you better get your food quick. jeongguk wolfs down, like, two plates of food -- and then leftovers if there are any.” 

“he’s young though.” 

“the youngest, yeah. but still. a man’s gotta eat, and he makes that hard sometimes,” yoongi says, giving a small bow of his head when he’s handed a plate, easily handing it over to you. 

yoongi snorts at the noises you make as you eat. 

“calm down, cub,” he says, chopsticks halfway to his mouth. “the food’s not that good, is it?” 

“do you know how long it’s been since i’ve eaten real korean food? i’m dying right now. this is so fucking good, i’m gonna cry,” you say, pouting, cheeks stuffed with rice and bulgogi. yoongi rolls his eyes and shakes his head, but is quick to eat another mouthful before he can be caught smiling. 

“tell me everything, cub. what’ve you been doing for the last decade?” 

“getting dragged all around the states and europe. life sucks when your dad’s a travelling doctor, y’know? it was so fucking hard, and like, i’d get so damn angry when our calls cut out, or letters wouldn’t get to me, like...” you don’t even realise how hard you’re holding onto your chopsticks until yoongi’s nudging your thigh with his knee gently. “sorry. i just... i just hated it so much, cub. i hated not being with you anymore, i hated wondering if you were mad at me for leaving--” 

“no, what the fuck? no. no way,” yoongi interrupts, putting his food down to grab your hand. “hey. listen to me. i wasn’t mad. i never will be mad at you. shit happens that you can’t control, and it was pretty shitty that you had to leave, but we’re here now, aren’t we? we found each other again, didn’t we?” you sigh before looking up at yoongi. 

“i guess so. it just sucked, cub. that was eleven years of hell.” you suddenly aren’t hungry anymore, resorting to just numbly pushing your food around with your chopsticks. “what about you though?” you ask. “how the hell did you end up here?” 

“god. okay.” yoongi pulls his seat closer to you, further blocking the both of you off from the rest of the staff and crew. “so, after you left, i kind of couldn’t stay in daegu anymore because everything just reminded me of you, you know? it was hella gross and shit, like, you would’ve laughed at me for how much i cried.” you snort but let him continue. “so, like, yeah, i decided to move up to seoul to become this ‘big and successful music producer’, but you know me. i never think things through properly. so i’m out here, selling my music for free--” 

“that’s not exactly selling anything, cub.” 

“don’t i know it. i’m working three part time jobs, highkey dying without my best friend, and life is just t-o-u-g-h. anyway. on some weird whim, i go audition for this company, somehow fucking get in, and... yeah. that’s about it. here i am. writing pop songs and shit.” 

“god, i bet you love being in front of the camera, huh.” 

“oh fuck, i adore it,” he says, sarcastic. 

“how’re your parents?” you laugh, changing the subject. 

“they’re good, yeah. they come up here every now and again, but they’re still in daegu for the most part. they were very against everything. but now that i’m makin’ bank, your boy is suddenly the golden child.” 

“i’m glad you stuck with your music. might’ve cried when i heard you did, but you didn’t hear that from me.” 

“you cried?” he asks. you shrug, embarrassed. “cute. but, hey. you’re a director’s assistant now, cub. guess all those movies we stayed up all night watching actually fucking paid off.” 

“hey.” 

the both of you turn to watch jimin pull his chair up beside the both of you, carefree smile on his lips. 

“get lost, jimin,” yoongi groans. “me and _____ are talking.” 

“uh, we had to listen to you constantly yap on about your long lost best friend for years. i think we deserve to talk to her too,” jimin replies, getting comfortable. 

“yeah,” another voice calls out, and then suddenly, another chair is being dragged closer. “we practically know her too with how much you talked about her. i’m v, by the way! but just call me taehyung.” 

“nice to meet you. i’m _____,” you say, chuckling. 

“listen. _____ is too nice to tell you guys to fuck off, but i’m not,” yoongi says. “so fuck off.” taehyung scrunches up his nose in distaste. 

“i hope you’re not as mean as yoongi hyung is,” he says, looking at you. 

“nah,” you say. 

“coo--” 

“i’m worse.” 

“rest in peace, lee jumin,” yoongi says, dramatically crossing himself. “you will be missed.” 

“who’s lee jumin?” jeongguk asks, sitting up, eyes wide with curiosity. 

“some kid _____ cussed out in our sophomore year. it was quite the sight, man. you guys should’ve been there. she really ripped him a new one.” 

“wow, okay. first of all, he deserved it,” you say, pointing a finger at yoongi. he holds his hands up and shrugs, feigning innocence. “second of all, he chose to move schools. i had nothing to do with it.” 

“you made a kid transfer school? savage,” one of the group members says. “i’m namjoon, by the way.” 

“nice to meet you. and, no. i didn’t make a kid move school. but it was a good thing he did, because if i caught him peeking into the girls locker room after basketball practice one more time, i swear to god...” 

“but that’s the only thing that made high school bearab-- never mind. hi! jung hoseok. also known as j-hope.” 

“and i’m seokjin. i have a question,” one of the members -- seokjin -- says, raising his hand. “why does yoongi call you ‘cub’?” 

“oh. that’s a secret we’re taking to the grave.” 

the rest of the day goes by smoothly, and by the end, everyone is ahead of schedule. 

it’s crazy how easily you’re able to talk to the rest of yoongi’s bandmates, and suddenly it makes sense why he seems so comfortable with all of them when you feel the exact same way, even after a single day. 

as the rest of the crew are busy packing up the equipment, yoongi comes up to you, looking like he was halfway in the process of changing. 

“cub, where’re you staying?” he asks, voice lowered slightly. 

“like, which hotel? the four seasons. it’s actually so cool, from what i saw when we dropped our stuff off. why?” 

“let’s hang out, just the two of us. i mean, i love the guys, but i also haven’t seen you in over a decade.” 

“sounds good to me, cub. pass me your phone. i’ll give you my number. surely you’re rich enough to afford international phone calls now, right?” 

yoongi snorts, grinning. 

“the phone plan is company subsidised, so you can thank bighit for all our future conversations.” 

at around a quarter passed midnight, there’s a quiet knock on your door. so close to falling asleep, you stumble off the bed to get up and answer it. you know it’s yoongi, he’d texted you five minutes earlier to tell you he was on his way, but you can’t help the nervousness that rises, as if it’s the first time you’ll be seeing him after a long time. 

“hey,” he says, smiling softly once you’ve opened the door. “sorry for stopping by so late.” you shake your head, opening the door wider to let him come in. 

“it’s fine. i know you’re busy,” you say, holding back a yawn. 

“and i know you’re probably tired.” 

yoongi shuts the door behind him, walking over to hug you tightly. you hum softly at how warm he is, at how nice it is to be able to do this again after so long. 

“god, i missed you,” he whispers, hiding his face in your hair. 

“me too,” you reply. “i’m sorry we lost touch.” 

“don’t be. it’s in the past now, cub.” 

without letting go of you, yoongi waddles the both of you over to the bed, letting you both fall and hit the soft mattress together. he shuffles you both up until your heads touch the pillows, and this is dangerously comfortable. 

“have you been happy, yoongi? in the eleven years we were separated?” 

yoongi chews on his bottom lip, contemplating. 

“i’ve been... content. but, no. never happy. not properly. not without you.” 

you look at him wordlessly for a moment, nothing but the sound of you both breathing filling the space between you. 

“me too,” you reply eventually. you shuffle forward, until your face is pressed up against the crook of his neck. “i feel like... like i never even got used to being away from you either.” 

“yeah,” yoongi replies, nodding. “like i was just... constantly waiting to just run into you again.” 

“and... it worked.” 

you tilt your head back to look up at him, smiling back when he looks down at you. 

“yeah. it did.” 

you’re both woken up by the shrill ringing of a phone. yoongi groans before rolling over to grab his phone off the bedside table. 

“hello?” he answers, voice still rough with sleep. 

“uh... hyung? you should probably get back now. like, i’m just assuming you stayed with _____, but manager hyung just called jin hyung to ask if we were ready,” jimin says. yoongi sits up, panicked. 

“oh fuck.” 

“oh fuck is right, hyung. we got you covered for like, twenty minutes tops, so you better get down here. quick.” 

with all the commotion, you roll over, rubbing your eyes as you start to wake. 

“g’morning,” you say, mid-yawn. 

“mornin’, cub. uh... i gotta go before i get my ass beaten.” 

it takes a while for yoongi’s words to register, but when they do, you’re bolting upright too, now wide awake. 

“shit.” 

“it’s alright. jimin just called. the guys are covering for me, but, uh... i need to go,” he says. 

“yeah, of course. yeah. fuck. go. i’ll see you in an hour anyways,” you reply, already climbing off the bed, yoongi right behind you. 

things run just as smoothly as yesterday on day two of the music video shoot. 

everything is infinitely more comfortable now that everyone knows who is who, and having left off yesterday ahead of schedule, there’s less tension in the air, and noticeably less stress floating around. 

as easy as everything is today, however, you do notice that yoongi’s been acting a little... funny, not enough to raise concern, but enough that you can notice. the rest of the group seem to be fine, and nothing else seems to be out of the ordinary, so, for the most part, you think nothing of it. maybe he was still feeling a little nervy after almost being caught this morning. ( you make sure to discreetly whisper words of thanks to yoongi’s bandmates when you get the chance. ) 

“lunch later?” yoongi asks, a little out of breath as he takes a swig of water, having just finished a dance sequence. 

“of course, cub,” you reply, looking up from the pile of papers on your lap. “as if you even had to ask.” 

“hey, i’m just making sure, okay? wait. i gotta go change. i’ll see you later.” 

you watch yoongi run off with little shake of your head. 

at lunch, you notice yoongi constantly looking at you, trying to be discreet and failing. 

“what? is there something on my face? god, you used to do this all time, making me paranoid as hell in the middle of eating, making me think there’s, like, sauce all over me and fucking messing with me. you’re the worst.” 

yoongi chuckles softly, reaching out to grab your wrist to stop your hand from wiping your face. 

“you’re fine. you don’t have food on your face,” he says. you narrow your eyes, not entirely convinced. 

“taehyung, do i have food on my face?” taehyung looks up, eyes wide, cheeks stuffed with food. 

“you look fine to me,” he mumbles. “why?” 

“nothing. just checking. don’t worry about it.” yoongi lets go of your wrist with a smile, turning his attention back to his food. “why do you keep looking at me, cub?” he shrugs. 

“just making up for lost time, i guess. haven’t seen your face in eleven years.” 

you’re confused, but... it kind of makes sense, and yoongi’s always had his own way of going about things after all. you shrug, and go back to eating, trying to resist the urge to look back at him every time you catch him looking way in the corner of your eye. 

“okay. yoongi. for real. i know we haven’t seen each other in ages, but you looking at me all the time is starting to get creepy,” you say, packing up director yang’s papers. “like, take a pic or something, cub.” 

“can i?” he asks. 

“can you what?” 

“take a pic.” 

with furrowed eyebrows, you look at him, surprised to find that he looks dead serious. 

“oh, uh... sure? i mean, if you want to, i guess?” 

“’kay. gimme a sec.” 

you’re still confused when you watch him run off to the dressing room, where you assume he’s gone to get his phone. eventually, however, you realise you still have work to do, and rather than fussing over yoongi, you go back to doing your job, thinking you can talk to him later about his weird behaviour. 

your head lifts immediately at the sound of a camera shutter. 

“wh--” you look up just in time to see yoongi lowering his phone, grinning down at his screen. “yoongi!” 

“nice. new wallpaper,” he says, lifting his phone once more. “gotta take one for the lock screen though.” 

“wh--” he snaps a photo before you can say anything else. then he takes another photo. and another. and another, until he’s repeatedly taking photos rapid fire, thumb frantically tapping at his screen. “yoongi, for fuck’s sake,” you cry out, reaching forward to try and grab his phone, but he’s looking at you through the screen with one of his gummy smiles that you can’t help but start to laugh every time he dodges your grasp, ending up in weird positions every time. “yoongi!” 

“wait! i haven’t taken one from a good angle yet,” he laughs, holding the camera under your chin. 

“you fucker!” 

heads start to turn towards the both of you at the ruckus, staff and crew watching you jump onto yoongi’s back, phone still out of reach, half laughing and half yelling in protest at all the photos he’s taking. 

“oh, you look good in that one,” he says, holding his phone up so you can see the picture of you: blurry, your face contorted in a weird expression of half amusement-half anger, taken from a very unflattering angle. “asshole. stop taking such ugly photos,” you groan, making one last attempt to try and grab his phone. 

“one more. just one more. together this time. and then i’ll stop.” 

it’s a tempting offer that you’ve already agreed to in your mind, but you huff out a sigh for show. 

“ugh. fine.” 

yoongi grins, adjusting your position on his back before raising his phone in front of you both. 

“alright. say reunited, and it feels so good,” he sings, thumb tapping at his screen in time to catch the way you laugh, hiding your face in his hair. definitely lock screen material. 

“hyung, you like her, don’t you?” yoongi’s thumb freezes on his screen where he’d been busy scrolling through the photos he’d taken of you earlier, smile faltering when he turns to look at jimin, confused. 

“the fuck are you talking about?” 

“your friend, _____. you like her, don’t you?” jimin repeats. 

“she’s my best friend, you brat. of course i like her.” 

“no, i mean... you like like her. like more than a friend. romantically.” 

“what the f--” 

“i mean, he’s not wrong,” seokjin says, turning around in his seat to face yoongi. “you’re weren’t exactly subtle about the way you kept looking at her today.” 

“hyung, we haven’t seen each other in over a decade. and what’s wrong with looking at my best friend?” yoongi asks, putting his phone down. 

“nothing. until you’re looking at her like you’re in love with her,” seokjin replies, shrugging. 

“in love with her?!” 

“dude, you’re totally in love,” namjoon says, pulling out an earbud. “jeongguk’s usually completely oblivious when it comes to girls, but even he could tell something was up between you two.” yoongi glances over at where the youngest sits, lips slightly parted in his slumber, head resting against the window. “did you guys have sex or something when you slept over at her hotel room last night?” 

“dude, what the fuck? no, we didn’t have sex! we just fell asleep together while talking. she just got off a goddamn plane from america, for fuck’s sake,” yoongi says, hostile. 

“i mean, you’re being awfully defensive right now, hyung.” 

“don’t you throw that psychological warfare shit on me, namjoon. you don’t know what the hell you’re talking about. none of you do.” 

the car falls into a heavy silence, the members who’d turned around to tune into the conversation turning back to face the front. 

yoongi huffs, reaching for his earphones, ready to ignore the world. his phone chimes with a notification just as he plugs them in. 

[ sms: 진형 ] what’s wrong with falling in love with your best friend, yoongi? 

with furrowed eyebrows, yoongi looks up and stares at the back of seokjin’s head in front of him, the elder looking calm, acting like he hadn’t just texted his own bandmate in the same car. 

[ sms: SUGA ] um. nothing? 

[ sms: 진형 ] then why’re you so  [ sms: 진형 ] idk  [ sms: 진형 ] offended? or at least acting like you’re offended by the idea of being in love with _____? 

yoongi looks back up at the back of seokjin’s head, willing his gaze to bore holes into his hyung’s head. 

[ sms: SUGA ] i’m not. 

yoongi watches seokjin turn his head slightly, a subtle suggestive gesture. yoongi exhales out from his nose as calmly as he can ( read: not very ). 

[ sms: 진형 ] if you’re scared or something, you don’t have to be. if she’s as great as you tell us she is -- and we KNOW she is, now that we know her personally -- then shouldn’t falling in love with her be the best case scenario for your friendship? 

yoongi reads the message. then, he rereads it. then, he rereads it again and again, until he’s practically memorised the words, thumbs moving of their own accord before he can stop himself. 

[ sms: 진형 ] hyung. [ sms: 진형 ] i’m in love with my best friend.  [ sms: 진형 ] fuck. 

you’re frozen in the doorway of your hotel room. 

you’d just opened the door to let yoongi in when he’d leaned forward, crossing the threshold to cup your cheeks and kiss you without warning. even after pulling away, his eyes are still shut tightly, forehead pressed against yours. 

“y-yoongi?” you ask, voice nothing more than a mere whisper. 

“fuck. fuck. fuck, i’m so sorry, cub,” he whispers back, shaking his head. you carefully shut the door behind him, before letting your hands find purchase on his arms. “i just... i...” 

“i know.” 

yoongi’s head snaps up, eyes opening immediately. 

“wh-- how?” 

“i know how to put two and two together. i did it on the drive back here. and i hate to break it to you, but you’re not very subtle, cub,” you say, smiling softly. “i wasn’t too sure if i was right but... i guess i am.” 

“fuck,” yoongi sighs. “are you mad at me?” 

“of course not. when have i ever been mad at you?” 

“seven years old. i drank the rest of your apple juice without asking.” 

“that was nothing, cub,” you reply, chuckling softly. 

“you still got mad at me.” 

“because i left to get you a glass just before you drank mine, remember?” 

yoongi sighs again, hanging his head low. rubbing his arms, you bring him over to the bed, sitting down on the edge and patting the space behind you, inviting him to join you. 

“i don’t get it,” he says, sitting down. “i thought i got over you years ago, cub.” 

“yeah, me t-- wait. what?” now it’s your turn to be surprised. “you... all this t--” 

“yeah.” yoongi furrows his eyebrows. “wait. you too?” you nod. “what the fuck? since when?” 

“the school summer festival in freshman year of high school, when we stayed behind to watch the fireworks together. you?” 

“middle school graduation, when we went to go eat jjajangmyeon and fried chicken. you burnt your tongue on the noodles.” 

“what the fuck?” you say, sighing. “you mean we could’ve been having this conversation before i left daegu?” 

“wow. i hate us,” yoongi scoffs. 

“yeah, i fucking hate us too.” the both of you sit quietly, taking in the new information. “well... what do we do now?” 

“i dunno.” he turns to look at you. “can i kiss you? again?” 

“yeah. hell yeah. fuck yeah you can,” you say, already leaning over. 

yoongi meets you halfway, one hand reaching up to hold the back of your neck gently, thumb stroking your skin as your lips touch. it’s a kiss that’s filled with relief, soft and sweet, with a gentleness that not many people get to see from yoongi. you don’t know if you kiss for five minutes or five hours, but when you both inevitably pull away for oxygen, it feels like hell, like yoongi is way too far away from you the second your lips aren’t touching anymore. 

“_____?” he says, and there’s an underlying hesitation in his voice. 

“yeah?” 

“have you... ever... y’know...” 

“um... this?” he nods. “no, never. i... i couldn’t, knowing it wasn’t you.” nervously you play with your fingers. “how about you?” 

“uh... a couple times, in, like, shitty attempts to try and get over you.” 

“did it work?” you ask. 

“nope. didn’t stand a chance. honestly, i almost said your name one time and i was this close to getting kicked in the balls.” the both of you chuckle, but when it dies down, you look up at him shyly. 

“i mean, not that i don’t trust you, but... be gentle with me, cub.” 

“of course. fuck. of course, cub. the last thing i want to do is hurt you,” yoongi replies immediately, reaching up to cup your face in his palms, stroking your cheeks with his thumbs. “you have total permission to kick me in the balls if i do.” you smile and roll your eyes. 

“idiot.” 

“your idiot,” he corrects. “if you want me to be, that is.” it’s your turn to cup his cheeks, smiling as he lowers his hands down to rest on your hips. 

“of course i do, yoongi.” 

“i... i love you, cub.” 

“i love you too, cub. i always have.” 

yoongi smiles, unnaturally shy, before leaning forward to kiss you again, with more urgency than the last, and just like before you have no idea how much time passes before the kiss is broken briefly for breaths of air. yoongi uses his hold on your hips to hoist you up onto his lap, and you gasp with surprise against his lips when they reconnect. you’re both impossibly close, a desperation that only a decade a part can create in your body language, the way you both wrap your arms around each other as if you’re afraid the other will leave again. 

you feel his hands slowly reach under your shirt, stroking the bare skin of your back, and it’s like electricity runs up your spine at how warm his fingers are. he takes his time in pushing your shirt up higher, and for the moment, the both of you forget that there’ll be work early tomorrow morning, acting as if you both had all the time in the world. 

“may i?” he asks, just as his tongue brushes against your bottom lip, your shirt bunched up just under your bra. you nod, helping him pull it off of you, throwing it off to the side. his gaze falls to your chest, watching as it rises and falls with each breath you take. 

your nervous when he reaches up to cup your breasts in his hands, thumbs brushing over the lace of your bra. you’re about to say something, complain about his staring, but the words die on the tip of your tongue when yoongi leans down to press kisses to the curves of your breasts, humming quietly at how soft and supple the flesh is. 

you shut your eyes with a soft sigh when his hands squeeze you gently, still peppering butterfly kisses all over your skin. you don’t know how many times you’ve dreamed of this night happening, but everything is exceeding your expectations, all because it’s yoongi. 

“can i take it off?” he whispers, warm breath tickling you. 

“yeah,” you say, voice airy and light. 

yoongi reaches around to work on the clasp of your bra, clumsy fingers struggling until you reach back with a soft smile to undo it for him, letting the straps fall off your shoulders. he presses a kiss to the corner of your lips just as he pulls your bra away to join your shirt, and when he pulls back, he feels all the wind knocked out of him when he takes a look at you. 

you don’t miss the way yoongi’s eyes widen slightly at the sight of your bare chest, fingers taking their time to touch every inch of exposed skin, leaving goosebumps in their wake. you shiver a little when his fingers brush against your nipples, watching them tauten under his ministrations. 

and then, just like that, something snaps, and yoongi is quick to bend down and wrap his lips around your nipple, sucking without warning. you gasp, your back arching at the sensation, pushing your chest out closer to him. 

“oh,” you sigh, hands gripping his shoulders as he continues to touch you, taste you. he hums against your skin with approval, squeezing your other breast gently. “yoongi.” 

“okay? do you want me to stop?” he asks, lifting his head to look at you. 

“no, don’t you dare,” is your hurried reply. 

yoongi chuckles as he presses a kiss to the underside of your jaw, suddenly standing and turning around with you still in his embrace, lowering you down to lie on the bed. he goes back to sucking on your nipple with sporadic flicks of his tongue that don’t fail to have you squirming beneath him. one hand smooths down the flat of your stomach, nimble fingers undoing the drawstring of your shorts with ease. 

letting go of your nipple with a lewd pop, yoongi sits up on his knees to allow him to pull your shorts off, throwing them off the bed. his fingers graze against the garter of your panties, and god, you curse yourself for not putting anything sexier than plain white cotton panties on earlier. he casts you a concerned gaze, making sure you’re still giving him the go-ahead; you nod when your eyes meet. 

yoongi is agonisingly slow when he starts to pull your panties off, smiling when you lift your hips off the mattress to help him. your underwear doesn’t even make it off the bed like the rest of your clothes do because instantly he’s been stunned silent by your naked body. self consciousness sweeps over you, and instinct wants you to bring your legs together and cover yourself. yoongi stops you before you can. 

“don’t. please don’t,” he says, not taking his eyes off of you. “you’re beautiful, _____. fuck, you’re so beautiful, cub.” 

your cheeks flush red as compliment after compliment spills from yoongi’s lips as he looks at you, all of you, completely exposed. with his hands on your knees, he gently pushes your legs apart, situates himself between them, fingers skirting down the length of your thighs. you glance down, noticing the bulge that’s grown in his jeans, and you flush a deep shade of crimson at the thought that you are the cause of that. 

“tell me, okay? tell me to stop if i hurt you, and i will. i promise.” you nod, unable to find your voice, watching as yoongi shoves his jacket and shirt off before laying down on his stomach between your legs. 

the feeling of his warm breath brushing against you is enough to have your legs shaking a little, but nothing can prepare you for the feeling of yoongi’s tongue licking at your clit. you gasp and moan at the sensation, mouth open in a wide o, your legs torn between closing shut and opening wider. yoongi seems to sense this, however, placing his hands gently but firmly on your thighs to keep you still. 

the flicks of yoongi’s tongue are a little sloppy and uncoordinated, but they don’t fail to have you moaning quickly, sounds escalating as he continues to pleasure you. he stops for a moment, pulls his mouth away, curling one arm around your thigh to rub his thumb against you as he sucks on his fingers. this sight is so embarrassingly lewd when you look down to watch him, but you don’t even get a chance to cringe before he’s slowly pushing his now-wet finger into you, eyes snapping up to watch your expression shift, cautious of any signs of pain. 

you moan and arch your back off the bed, the heels of your feet digging into the mattress as your hips buck upwards. 

“yoongi!” you cry out, biting down on your bottom lip. 

“does it feel good, cub? or do you want me to stop?” yoongi asks, leaving a trail of kisses along your thigh. 

“yes! i-i mean, no, i don’t want you to st-op! ah!” 

your legs are well and truly shaking now, so overloaded with pleasure that you don’t really know how long you’re gonna last. yoongi is careful to take his time, to be thorough in stretching you out, keeping you calm and relaxed with each finger he pushes into you and each swipe of his tongue against your clit. 

you almost want to cry when he pulls his fingers out, all three of them now slick with your juices, suddenly hit with this new feeling of emptiness. you watch through half lidded eyes as yoongi pushes himself back up onto his knees, undoing and unzipping his jeans, groaning softly at the loss of restriction on his crotch. he’s quick to push his pants off, thumbs hooking on the garter of his boxers to tug them off right after. 

his cock is red and hard, leaking precome and looking sensitive from the lack of attention given to it this whole time. you watch him wrap his fingers around it, giving his wrist light jerks, and you marvel at the way the muscles in his stomach tighten at the sensation, hips giving an involuntary thrust forward. 

“god, you’re so beautiful... so fucking beautiful, baby. i love you,” he says, looking once more down at your body before throwing his head back with a quiet groan. 

“yoongi. please, baby, i want you. i need you,” you whine, reaching up to grab his free hand. 

yoongi presses his lips together and suppresses another groan, giving your fingers a gentle squeeze as they entwine with his. he shuffles closer on his knees, holding the base of his cock to help guide it into you. he’s barely pushed himself into you when you arch your back so high off the bed you almost sit up. 

“o-ohh!” he moans, voice shaky as he lets go of his cock to slam his hand flat on the bed to steady himself, resisting the urge to push right into you. “ohh fuck, fuck, fuck, baby, fuck, you’re so... y-you’re so...” 

“o-ohh my god, yoongi, baby. god, you’re so big,” you moan, squeezing his hand tight. 

yoongi lets out a breath that comes out too shaky to be called controlled, gripping the sheets in his fist because you’re so tight and warm around his cock, he’s going to go insane because of how fucking amazing it feels. 

you give his hand a tug and pull him down suddenly, and he just barely manages to catch himself before he crushes you under his weight. he’s close enough that you can reach his lips, but all hope of kissing is lost when it’s something akin to panting against each other. yoongi continues to push himself into you slowly, stopping periodically to let you adjust, and it might take longer than usual, but yoongi promised not to hurt you. he’s not breaking that promise. ever. 

when yoongi bottoms out, the both of you lie still, attempting to keep all semblance of self control intact for as long as you both can. it proves to be a feat, when all these new sensations make you want to just burst, but it’s comforting to know that you don’t seem to be the only one feeling that way. 

“a-are you okay?” yoongi asks, pressing kisses to your jaw, hoping to relieve you of any pain you might be feeling. “am i hurting you?” you shake your head frantically. “then w-why are you crying, cub?”

oh. you hadn’t even realised you were. 

“b-because,” you say, taking a shaky breath. “it feels so good. y-you feel good, yoongi. i love you. god, i love you so much.” 

“i-i love you too,” he replies. “so much. i always will.” he groans softly, hiding his face in your neck. “c-can i move?” 

“please.” 

the first thrust has you both crying out with surprise. your legs seem to act of their own accord, immediately wrapping around his waist as if your body is so desperate to keep him inside of you. you thrusts into you again, and again, each more powerful than the last, until you have to let go of his hand to press up against the headboard and stop yourself from hitting your head. 

the way you sob, frantically asking for more in his ear has yoongi’s head reeling with arousal, because he’s always loved the sound of your voice, but the way you’re saying his name right now is on a whole other level of satisfying. you’re holding onto him so tightly, it’s going to drive him crazy -- you’re going to drive him crazy. 

before long, the pleasure starts to build with every thrust, and a tension starts to accumulate in your stomach, begging to be released. 

“y-yoongi... baby, i-i think i’m gonna...” you say, pressing your lips to his shoulder. 

“i’ve got you, cub,” he whispers. “come for me. god, i bet you’re so pretty when you come.” you shut your eyes tightly, the pressure building and building as yoongi covers your face in butterfly kisses, until you can’t hold back any longer. something seems to burst inside you and all of a sudden, everything goes tight. 

you don’t even realise how loud you’re crying out yoongi’s name until he’s pressing his lips against yours in an attempt to quiet you down for the sake of the people in the neighbouring rooms ( though, truth be told, he can’t say he hates the idea of other people knowing what you two are doing right now, and there’s no denying the pride that swells in his chest, knowing that you are his, and he is yours ). 

he whispers soft words of praise in your ear as you start to come down from your high, his thrusts slowing enough to avoid overstimulation. but he can’t hold back any longer, and though you whine in protest at the sudden loss, yoongi pulls out just in time to paint your stomach in streaks of white. 

you don’t know how long you lie there with yoongi, legs entwined, come drying on your skin as he pets your hair as you both try to catch your breath. you can feel your eyes start to grow heavy with fatigue, and yoongi coos in your ear, assures you that he won’t be going anywhere any time soon. 

the last thing you hear before you drift off to sleep is a soft, i love you, cub, whispered in your hair, and if that’s how you’re gonna end every night for the rest of your life, you’ll take it.

[jesbakescookies]

Too Hot To Handle: Chapter Thirty

So I kinda wrote a different kind of fanfiction. It’s nothing as in depth as my other fics so I am going to post it here. ENJOY!!***Actor, Real Person Fanfiction, Walking Dead RPF***Featuring: Jeffrey Dean Morgan X Original Female Character, Norman Reedus and others.. (FYI this is total fiction, as in I know nothing about JDMs life or that of his real SO and son etc. Because of this, for this work of fiction, they don’t exist. Jeffrey’s been a typical actor playboy dating fellow stars etc. This is written for sick daydreaming pleasure.)

Aria St. James is a busy woman with a thriving restaurant. She thought she had everything she needed until a few famous faces visit her dining room. A tall, dark and handsome actor decides Aria’s just what he’s been looking for.

Rating: Mature : NSFW **dirty dirty**

I don’t have a masterlist for this fic yet but if you go to tags and choose Too Hot To Handle, it will pull them all up. Thanks!

Jeffrey and Aria landed in Georgia in the afternoon, their flight too short for both their liking. Standing at the baggage claim the couple stood with the security team that met them as planned. Jeffrey signed autographs and took pictures with fans as Aria stood to the side. Soon paparazzi were surrounding them and the couple was inundated with questions. Aria ducked her head and walked with Jeffrey as the bodyguards escorted them to their ride. "Aria! Jeffrey!" Their voices shouted as the dark tinted vehicle pulled to the curb. "Is that an engagement ring?" "When's the wedding?" "How did he propose?" Aria grit her teeth as the climbed into the backseat, Jeffrey scooting in and avoiding the questions with a grin and wave. "Fuck." He huffed after the door shut. "I'm sorry sweetheart." Rubbing her temple, she gave him a shaky smile. "It's fine." "No it's not." "Well, it was bound to get out. I should've taken the ring off.” “No you shouldn't.” He spoke firmly, his hooded eyes staring at her until she nodded. “That's the only part of you, I don’t want to see fucking naked.”

Aria chuckled at his teasing, the man breaking the tension. Kissing her knuckles, he leaned back and smirked at her. 

Jeffrey's phone began to blow up with calls from his publicist and managers as they received calls for statements. He started fielding questions, while their driver took them back to his place. Aria could hear his publicist nearly yelling into the phone about not informing her of their engagement, the man avoiding telling her the reality of the situation. Rolling his eyes as he listened to her, Jeffrey reached out and held Aria’s hand, his thumb brushing across her ring absentmindedly. The sight and sensation of his gesture had Aria calming down. She wasn't sure what was to come but having just run the gauntlet at the airport, she was dreading everyday life. The idea of locking herself away in the kitchen and never leaving, crossed her mind.

Jeffrey leaned his elbows on his knees as he listened to his manager and publicist argue about how they should announce their engagement. He was slowly growing angrier as they both seemed to insist the newlyweds go on a daytime talkshow. Pulling out his phone, he texted Aria despite having just left her in the safety of her kitchen, he missed her presence already. Jeffrey couldn't stand the thought that soon he would start filming a movie on the other side of the country. "They want us to do it on daytime tv." "Fuck that." She wrote a minute later. "Please tell me you don't want that." "Oh come on, you'll love it." "Jeffrey Dean Motherfucking Morgan. You better be kidding or else..." "Or else what?" he wrote, smirking at her words. "I will never do that thing with my tongue you love." "Fine, no tv." He replied with a chuckle. "Are we boring you Jeffrey?" Katherine asked haughtily. "Yes." He grunted, while typing a question to Aria. "Shall we boycott everyone's fucking opinion and announce it our way?" "Like how?" "Do you trust me?" "Obviously, I married you for a reason." Opening up his twitter app, Jeffrey typed out a short succinct message to his fans. "Went to Florida and all I got was a beautiful fucking wife and best friend forever. #bestvacationever.” Sending the link to Aria, she replied with a picture from her rarely used account. The shot was of the little church near the beach, the preachers wife having caught them shortly after their ceremony. They stood in the gazebo, Jeffrey holding her hands upon his chest as he stared down at her. Aria was smiling, her tan skin popping against the cream dress. The ocean stretched out behind them, the crystal clear azure waters so vibrant, it seemed fake. He remembered the exact moment and knew at that second he was thinking, “How the fuck did I get this stunner?” Jeffrey grinned at the picture and waited for his phone to start ringing. The women sitting in front of him however, were the first to lose their minds that not only had he announced it, but hadn't told them they'd actually gotten married, not just engaged. When his phone rang and flashed Norman's name, he answered it immediately. Anything was better than the two enraged women before him. Stepping onto the patio, Jeffrey lit a cigarette and took a long drag as his surrogate brother started in on him instantly. "What the fucking fuck man? Were you not even gonna tell me?" Norman barked into the phone. "Shit man, I would've thought you'd fucking mention it, or hell I don't know.. invite me." "Look, it wasn't planned. I'd been thinking about asking her and we just... ended up doing it. I got a ring and then she said yes and we figured we knew what we wanted and is wasn’t a big media fiasco wedding." "So you guys are like.. actually fucking married?" "Yeah, man. Official as shit." Jeffrey laughed, "I don't have a ring yet, we didn't have time. This weekend we're picking one up for me." "Fuck man." Norman huffed, the sound of his lighter flicking before he inhaled deeply. "Can't fucking believe you guys. Crazy fuckers." "It feels fucking right. Never been this..." "Happy?" "Yeah but it's more than that. I feel like I've been waiting for her. Fuck I don't know, it sounds goddamn stupid but she's like a limb I didn't realize I was missing. Now that I have her, I'm not letting her go." "You didn't have to marry her, to do that." "No I didn't, but I wanted her to be my wife. I wanted to be her husband. Come on man, don't be like all my handlers. Can't you be like, fucking happy for me?" Jeffrey growled in frustration, sucking on his smoke until the burn was too much for even his blackened lungs. "Shit, I am brother. It's awesome, I'm just surprised is all." Norman replied, his tone changing at Jeffrey's anger. "Is everyone giving you shit?" "Yeah. Apparently I'm not allowed to make any fucking decisions about my life. I wouldn't have announced it that way if they hadn't been pushing us to go talkshow hopping. Fuck that, I'm not putting Aria through that shit." "Wow, yeah I can't see her saying yes to it." "The fucked thing is, she would. If I asked her too, she'd do it, but I know it would just eat her up inside. She's so down to earth, she doesn't give a flying fuck about being famous. She just wants me and I'm not ever pushing it onto her." "Well, congrats man. I am happy for you guys. Would she be okay with having a party? I mean you've gotta celebrate, brother." "Yeah, we were talking about doing a reception or something. Nothing huge but to get all our family and close friends together. We could do it at her restaurant." "But she'll just fucking cook then." "Nah, well probably all day before it." Jeffrey replied with a chuckle while grinding his cigarette out in an ashtray. "I am happy for you, bro. I'm sorry, I didn't start out with that." "Thanks, Norm. You're literally the first person to congratulate us besides the preacher and his wife." "Shit, I'm sorry." "Don't be. It's not your fault everyone else sucks dick." "Speaking of sucked dick, I gotta tell you about this blonde I met the other night." "Jesus, I don't wanna hear about you getting your dick sucked." "Oh, come on man, I listened to you ramble about how awesome your old lady is." "Fucking hell, okay tell me all about it."

Aria looked at Jeffrey’s post again, a smile curling her lips at some of the replies. Of course there were the upset fans, the people who thought they would eventually get into bed with the man. Scoffing at the idea, Aria went back to work until Javier strode in with a grin. "You got fucking married!" "Yes." "That's fucking insane." Nodding, Aria waited for him to start yelling but instead he wrapped his inked arms around her tightly. "Congrats boss lady. Seriously I'm fucking happy for you." "You're not mad?" "No, why the fuck would I? I mean.. yeah, a wedding invite would've been nice but it's your guys' fucking wedding. Do what you want, fuck everybody else." Smiling, she let him look at her ring, her grin growing as Javier began rambling on about how amazing it was that she was Mrs. Morgan. She had expected anger and was pleasantly surprised that she wasn't dealing with the backlash everyone else was giving them. 

The night prep went fast and soon the restaurant was bustling. Aria wasn't surprised to see paparazzi camped out in front of the restaurant but was upset that they seemed to be staying there permanently. She received a few bouquets of flowers with congratulations cards, as well as quite a few calls from friends. Megan was the most upset, the idea that Aria was married before her, upsetting the bride to be. "Look, it wasn't planned." "So. You totally cut in line!" Aria laughed, while packing her bag for the night. "Don't be pissy with me, bitch." "Fuck you, you dirty whore!" Megan snapped, "I was supposed to get married first. You know it." "Oh my god, Megan stop or I'm hanging up." "Fine." She huffed before demanding, "tell me everything about your trip and your wedding night." "I'm not telling you about my wedding night." "You are. To make up for stealing my limelight." Meagan demanded. Rolling her eyes, Aria replied, "Oh Jesus, you can have your limelight. I just wanted the husband." "I can't believe you're married. I literally didn't think you would. Not to anyone but your restaurant." "Well, I did and I'm fucking happy." "Good. You deserve it." Sighing, Aria looked outside and saw a few camera men still hanging out for a picture. "Damn it." "What's wrong?" "Fucking vultures still outside waiting for me." She answered, her lip firmly chewed between her teeth as she talked herself into leaving the restaurant. "Hasn't Jeffrey given you any security?" "We talked about it. I didn't want to have the hassle but I may need to. At least until everything dies down." "It's never going to die down, stupid. You married the sexiest fucker alive." Rolling her eyes again, Aria replied, "I agree with you on half of that statement. It's gotta die down eventually. I'm not that exciting." "I don't know, I wouldn't bet on it." "Ugh." Aria grunted, hiking her bag higher on her shoulder. "Okay well I've gotta go brace for the outside world. We might have a party to celebrate. I'll let you know when it is." "I swear if you schedule it, like the day before my wedding I'll scream." Laughing at her, Aria replied, "Your wedding isn't for a six months. We were thinking in a couple weeks." "Fine. Be that way." "Fine." They both laughed before saying their goodbyes. Aria took a few steadying breaths as she approached the door leading to her escape.

"Smile and wave. Don't punch anyone." She muttered under her breath before opening the door. 

"Aria! Congratulations." "How'd he propose?" "Was it planned? Did you go to Florida to get married?" Smiling tensely, she thanked the man who congratulated her and kept walking towards her car. The group followed her, peppering her with questions and begging for an exclusive. Biting her lip, she tried to keep her mouth shut, but couldn't stop the words from spilling out. "Look guys, we're very happy to be married and I appreciate everyone's interest but I'm going to keep those memories to myself. Now if you don't mind I'm going to go home to my husband.” Reaching her car, Aria unlocked the doors and slide inside. Breathing in slowly, she turned the car on and pulled out, her eyes flicking to the rear view mirror to see the group finally dispersing. "How the fuck am I gonna do this?" She muttered. 

Find Chapter Thirty-One here:

http://jesbakescookies.tumblr.com/post/164647877776/too-hot-to-handle-chapter-thirty-one

I started posting this fic over on AO3 also. I will probably post in both places since I’m still figuring out AO3 formatting etc.

Let me know if you’d like to be tagged for updates. I’ll try my best to remember!

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[yourkeeperoftherunners]

I’ll Be Your Merman Pt. 2

Summary: AU He’s a merman who is being pushed by his parents to find a suitable mate. You were enjoying a day at the pier skateboarding when you met. “I’ll play Ariel if you’ll be my Princess.”

Rating: PG-13 (Minor language)

Characters: Reader x Merman! Baekhyun, Merman! Chanyeol, Merman! Xiumin, Merman! Chen

Notes: Slightly inspired by a friend’s fictional mermaid drabble and an idea I came up with. You asked for a part 2 – hope you guys enjoy!

Shout outs to @listenthemoose and @bubblehobi for reading and reblogging the first part – Thank you!

Part 1 –> link

“Baek...mmph! It’s...oh you’ve got to be kidding me,” you grumbled as you stared at the digital readout on your alarm clock, “4:52 in the morning! Can’t – yawn! – can’t this wait a little?”

“No, it’s almost sunrise and I wanna watch it with you!” Baekhyun said as he pressed his shell phone closer to his ear. “Can you come now?”

You muttered a string of complaints and a few swear words under your breath as you sat up and threw back the covers, searching for shoes and your skateboard. You rubbed a hand across your face and sighed. “Okay I’ll be there in...10 minutes. Oh and I’m not getting in the water for this – it’s too fucking early to get in a freezing cold ocean!”

He pouted, jutting his lip out as he began to swim back and forth. “But how are we gonna enjoy it together? And P.S. the water’s not that cold, Princess!”

“Ha, for you it isn’t!” you snorted as you slipped on a sweatshirt and quietly reached for your smartphone and keys. You put them into your pocket and closed the door to your house behind you, walking a short distance from your neighborhood before dropping your skateboard to the ground and stepping on. Secretly you were glad it was too early for anyone to be up – if they had seen you holding a shell to your ear at this hour, they’d think you were nuts.

It had been a few weeks since the adorable merman had tossed you his number and struck up a conversation about trying to hold onto your youth before you were both forced to be adults. His problem was his parents wanting him to find a mate soon and settle down, while you were trying to wrap things up on your studies and figure out what you wanted to do with your life. You had talked a lot over shell phone but it had been a while since you hung out in person.

“Baekhyun-ah, are you hanging out with her again?” Chanyeol asked as he watched his friend swim back and forth, shell phone in hand.

Baek nodded as you told him that you’d see him soon. He stuffed the shell into his messenger bag and gestured for Chanyeol to swim with him to the surface. Chanyeol tilted his head and glanced up at the surface.

“You sure?” Chanyeol asked.

Baekhyun rolled his eyes and grabbed his friend’s arm, dragging him along as he began to ascend. “It’s not like you had anything better to do! Come on, Y/N’s really great and I know you’re gonna get along great.”

“Baek where are you?” you called out in a hushed voice. You had skateboarded to a dock where a few private yachts and small personal boats were tied up. Just as you were starting to take a seat at the edge, you felt a wet hand tug on your ankle and you jumped at the contact. Baekhyun popped his head up from the water and smirked, raising his other hand in greeting. Chanyeol came up beside him and shyly waved at you.

“Y/N, this is my best friend Chanyeol,” Baekhyun said as he gestured to the other merman. “Chan, this is Y/N.”

“Hi, nice to meet Baek’s best friend,” you said with a smile.

Chanyeol returned the smile and shamelessly eyed your legs, starting from your ankles and ending at your thighs. “Nice to meet the girl Baek’s been calling a lot…nice legs by the way,” he murmured with a wink.

You ducked your head, feeling your ears burn at the compliment and Baekhyun pouted, nudging Chanyeol in the arm.

“Yah! Stop flirting with her!” Baekhyun whined.

Chanyeol snorted as he placed both hands on the dock and hoisted himself up so he could take a seat next to you. “Like you haven’t checked her legs out Baekhyun-ah.”

Baek opened his mouth to say something while you giggled, watching as his face flushed pink. He gestured to the remaining space on the dock between you and Chanyeol before pulling himself out of the water and sitting down. He wrapped his arms around you and your eyes widened at the sudden action.

“She’s my friend – no flirting with her!” Baek declared as he squeezed you. “And no looking at her in that way!”

You laughed as you stroked the top of Baekhyun’s head. “Aww, is my little merman getting jealous?”

Baekhyun started to pout at the comment until he felt your fingers running through his hair and brushing his ears. His eyes fluttered and he let out a little sigh, his cheeks warming. Chanyeol pretended to look disgusted and he nudged Baekhyun’s arm.

“Ugh, get a room hyung!” Chanyeol said with a shake of his head. “I’m an innocent merman who hasn’t been mated!”

“Please, you know what happens when mermen and mermaids mate! They teach this to us in school!” Baekhyun snorted, rolling his eyes.

“Hey guys, I thought we were gonna watch the sun come up,” you interrupted them, not wanting to hear the rest of the mating talk. “Look!”

Baekhyun snapped his head to the horizon and straightened up when he saw light starting to peek out. You stopped stroking Baek’s head and turned toward the horizon as the last traces of the dark sky began to give way to pinks and gold. Chanyeol stared with wide eyes as the sun slowly began to slip up into the sky and he sighed with a smile on his face. You couldn’t help but smile too as light began to spread out and up.

“I forgive you for waking me up so early Baek,” you murmured. “This was definitely worth getting up for. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” he said as he looked over at you. He scanned your outfit and huffed. “But I was hoping you were gonna come swim with me after!”

“I told you! Too. Fucking. Early. To. Swim,” you stated, crossing your arms over your chest. “So how are things under the sea?”

“Life is the bubbles!” Chanyeol joked. “Just like that movie you humans watch!”

Baekhyun groaned at Chanyeol’s pun and grumbled that he was spending too much time around Suho. “Aish, you’re gonna start sounding like a dad with bad dad jokes like him! He’s not that funny!”

“He tries! I think he’s funny!” Chanyeol shot back.

“Yeah, just you and Xiumin though,” Baekhyun snorted. He shot you an apologetic look and rested his palms on the deck, leaning back. “Ah...my mom and dad won’t stop asking me to find a mate. They’ve named some of the worst matches possible and I don’t know how much more I can take of it.”

“By worst, how bad are we talking?” you asked.

Baekhyun straightened up and pretended to flick imaginary strands of long hair around while making faces. He took on a high-pitched voice and mimicked many of the potential mermaids he dated or met at his parent’s request.

“You’re…a boy Baekhyun – I need a real merman! Aish, you’re too skinny, you need to do more hard work! Your family’s rich right? Ah that’s probably why you’re asking me – Mommy’s rich boy needs a girl and no one would look at him unless he had money!”

Chanyeol doubled over laughing as Baekhyun adopted a snooty look for his last impression and you shook your head at hearing some of the things said to him.

“Were they really that bitchy to you?” you asked.

Baekhyun nodded and you stared at him in disbelief. Sure Baekhyun wasn’t an overly macho bodybuilder of a merman but the guy had nice biceps and he did have abs. You loved his long lashes and the way his lips would jut out when he pouted or smiled cutely at you. Plus he understood your struggles and you sympathized with his.

“Umma wants me to be happy but I don’t wanna rush things,” Baekhyun sighed as he cupped his chin in his hands. “Our friend Xiumin went into an arranged mating and that didn’t end well. She left him before they could have kids – said he was too clingy but I know she had her eye on someone else for a while.”

“Poor guy,” you murmured.

Chanyeol cocked his head and looked over at you. “How about you Y/N? What’s up with you and the human world?”

You scrunched up your nose and pulled your knees up to hug them. “Oh I just finished my second to last year of college. Need to start thinking about my senior thesis, but not sure what I want to do it on. My mom isn’t forcing me to find anyone yet, but I think she’s worried about what I’m going to do with myself after graduation. My sister went off to the Air Force and she’s already been given several higher ranks and better pay. Plus it feels like a lot of my friends are already getting married or having kids.”

“Air Force?” Chanyeol asked. “Are those the things I see in the sky that look like faceless birds but not quite?”

“Um sort of Chan,” you admitted. “I think you saw regular airplanes – those take people to faraway places in a short period of time. The Air Force is part of a protection squad that the government relies on if there are any threats to the country – they are trained to fly small planes and to look for signs of threats or trouble from the skies. It’s hard to get into and it’s very rigorous but people like my sister love challenges like that. She’s away from home a lot because she has to live on a base close to work but she’ll visit sometimes.”

“You miss her?” Baekhyun asked.

You nodded and replied that it had been a few years since you saw her since she was unable to go on leave. “I know my mom is proud of her like I am, but she also worries about me doing something productive with my life after school.” You looked over your shoulder to make sure no one else was coming onto the dock to try to take a boat out early. Luckily, it was still early enough that even the elite was sleeping in.

“How much longer are you guys allowed to be up here before they notice?” you asked.

“Eh we have some time,” Chanyeol replied with a shrug of his shoulders. “As long as we don’t get caught by humans and cause a scene, we can do just about anything we want.” He yawned and stretched his long arms out, wincing when his stomach growled. “Sorry guys, I’m hungry.”

“I could eat too,” Baekhyun admitted. “Wanna catch our breakfast?”

“Hyung, Y/N doesn’t wanna eat raw fish,” Chanyeol groaned as he slapped his forehead. “Or I dunno, maybe you do.”

You shook your head and tried to think of something nearby you could grab. Then it hit you.

“Hey, you guys have pancakes down there?” you asked.

You were greeted with identical confused looks and you giggled as both tilted their heads, trying to figure out what you were asking about. “I’ll take that as a no then? Well I know I shouldn’t encourage unhealthy eating habits but I know a place not far from here that makes amazing pancakes – I’ll just grab some and we can split. Sound good?”

“Is she back yet?” Chanyeol whispered from his position under the dock.

“I think I see her,” Baekhyun said as he peeked up at the sound of a skateboard rolling towards them. Both had returned to the water, Chanyeol hiding under the dock while Baek kept a look out.

You picked up your board and held out the takeout box containing 9 fluffy pancakes cooked to golden brown perfection. “Brought syrup too in case. Oh and I like to put Nutella on mine – sorry, it’s a weird habit I picked up from my sister,” you said as you sat down and opened the box. You doled out three to each of them before tearing a piece off one and dunking it into a to-go packet of Nutella spread.

Chanyeol took one, studying it and taking a small bite. He chewed thoughtfully before ripping a larger piece off to enjoy. “It’s like a cloud!” he whooped with a goofy smile. “So soft and not too sweet! Oh can I have some of that syrup please?” You passed over the plastic cup with the maple syrup and explained what it was to him.

Baekhyun was slowly eating his and he tapped your knee, pointing to the Nutella. “I wanna try some – what is it?”

You held out the container and he scooped a small glob of it onto his piece. “It’s a chocolate hazelnut spread,” you explained.

He took a bite of the Nutella covered piece, small smears of the spread ending up on the corners of his lips. He licked them and polished off the piece with a smile. “I really like that! May I have more please?”

You pulled out another to-go packet and opened it for Baekhyun to use. You held one out to Chanyeol but he politely declined, saying he was enjoying them with the syrup or plain.

“Best morning ever,” Chanyeol murmured as he finished. “Saw the sunrise, ate pancakes, met Baekhyun’s cute friend.” He grinned widely at you and Baekhyun puffed his cheeks out.

“Waeeeeeeeeee! I said no flirting!” Baekhyun complained as he threw a piece of pancake at Chanyeol. The latter caught the piece before it could land in the water, smirking as he popped it into his mouth.

“Hey no fighting! Don’t waste pancakes!” you protested as you held your hands up.

Baekhyun huffed as he finished his pancakes and you bit your lip when you saw he still had a little smear of Nutella at the corner of his lips.

“Baek, you’ve got a little…”

“Get it off then,” Baek teased with a smirk.

You blushed before digging around in your pocket for a napkin, leaning forward to wipe the smear off. Baekhyun pouted slightly and you tilted your head.

“Aish, hyung!” Chanyeol murmured with a shake of his head. He slapped his forehead and then it dawned on you.

“Oh...” you said as you looked at Baekhyun. Your face felt warm and you nervously tucked a strand of hair behind your ear. You leaned forward, hands gripping the edge of the dock when you froze hearing someone whistle a sea tune. Taking that as their signal to leave, Baekhyun and Chanyeol quietly slipped under the surface of the water and you started cleaning up the mess from breakfast.

“Excuse me, do you have a boat here or are you waiting for one of the owners?” a voice asked as you straightened up. You turned and saw it was a fisherman who must have had one of his boats tied to the dock. You ducked your head and apologized, stating that you liked to come down to the docks to sit and eat breakfast.

“I didn’t know this was a private dock – I’ll leave sir,” you said.

The fisherman shrugged and waved it away as nothing. “Easy mistake to make lass,” he said. “You can stay as long as you like. I just need to know in case someone asks.”

You showed him the trash from breakfast and excused yourself with a smile, board in one hand and trash in the other.

“That was close hyung!” Chanyeol hissed as they swam back to their village.

“He was far away – I heard the whistle!” Baekhyun insisted. “By the way, why were you flirting with Y/N?”

Chanyeol shrugged and raised his brows. “Kinda hard not to – she’s really fun to hang out with and it doesn’t hurt that she’s pretty to look at.” He tilted his head and smirked. “Wait, is she…the one?”

“Waeeeee?!” Baekhyun sputtered with a shake of his head. “I mean, I really care about her and I could tell she was uncomfortable! You shouldn’t have continued to flirt with her – you saw how she reacted!”

“Uh huh, sure,” Chanyeol snorted as he crossed his arms over his chest. “You know that she could join us someday if she wanted.”

Baekhyun groaned as he began to head toward Chen and Xiumin’s place. “You and your movies – aish Chan, there’s no sea witch to make her a mermaid!”

Chanyeol rolled his eyes and followed after him. “Baekhyun-ah, that’s not what I meant! If you paid attention to the textbook, you would have seen a passage on binding promises between mermaids and humans.”

Baekhyun froze and lingered back, glancing over his shoulder in disbelief. He scrunched his brows up as he tried to recall where that section was in their texts and bit his lip.

Chanyeol smiled smugly as he drew himself up and recalled the content, “If a human locks eyes with a mermaid or merman and they ask a favor or make a promise in the form of a question, they are bound to fulfill it.”

“If they don’t?”

“Actually…no one knows,” Chanyeol replied as his shoulders sagged. “The humans try to hold up their end of the bargain in the end. I mean, I don’t know if that could make her into a mermaid but maybe if she felt the same and kept her promise…”

Baekhyun paused, rubbing the back of his neck as he recalled your first meeting with him, specifically the moment he asked if you could keep his tail and species a secret. Wait, had he actually made you swear to a binding promise without realizing it?

“How’d the recent date go?” Chen asked Baekhyun over drinks.

“New topic please.”

“You’re being too picky Baekhyun-ah!” Chen whined as he swirled his glass around.

Xiumin leaned over and rested a hand on Chen’s arm, shooting him a look. Chen bit his lip and ducked his head, muttering that he spoke too quickly.

Xiumin glanced over at Baekhyun and leaned his arms on the counter. “Baekhyun-ah, don’t rush into it,” he murmured before picking up his glass. “Learn from your hyung’s mistake.”

“See any cute humans to steal more bikini tops from?” Chen teased.

Baek shook his head and swallowed the rest of his drink. He chewed on his lip and debated whether he dare tell them about you. Chanyeol he could trust because they had been best friends since they were kids. But these two…

“I didn’t,” Baekhyun admitted. He kept his eyes on his glass as he continued, “But I met a cool human girl who rides a skateboard. She gave me some pancakes for breakfast.”

“What is a pancake?” Chen demanded as he put his glass down a little too loudly.

“Does she…?” Xiumin asked.

Baekhyun kept his eyes glued to the glass and Xiumin took his silence as a yes.

“She promised to keep my secret,” Baek added. “She looked me in the eye when she made the promise.”

“Ah binding promises – I’ve only read about them,” Xiumin said with a nod. “She sounds cool. I’m guessing she’s not very girly or into frills then?”

Baek shook his head and smiled fondly as he recalled your outfit from this morning – hair was messily pulled back, oversized sweatshirt with a faded logo on the front, shorts, and sneakers without laces. Nothing was fancy or shiny about your look but he could tell you looked comfortable and he liked that about you.

“She’s…very casual but comfortable with what she does and looks like,” Baekhyun said. “Thoughtful but a little unapologetic at times. Not fond of facing responsibilities head on but she knows they need to happen or be done.”

“So she’s a female version of you?” Chen concluded with a smirk. He yelped when Baekhyun smacked him in the arm and Xiumin shook his head at them.

“Anyone else know about her?” Xiumin asked. “Correction – aside from us and Chanyeol?”

Baekhyun shook his head and Xiumin nodded.

“Probably for the best,” Chen added. “Last thing you want is to have something happen like that human movie with the redheaded mermaid.”

“Aish, why must we talk about that?” Baek sighed, shaking his head.

“You were up early,” your mom commented at dinner that night.

You nodded and reached for the pepper shaker across the table. “Sorry – a friend of mine wanted to watch the sunrise today and I thought I’d join him. It was really beautiful – I’m glad I went.”

Your mom smiled and relaxed her shoulders, your answer giving her relief. It was better than you staying cooped up inside on your phone or computer doing hell knows what like other young adults, but she had to worry like a good mother did.

“Sounds like this is a good friend,” she replied. “Have I met them before?”

You shook your head and replied that you happened to meet by chance. It was kind of true but you told yourself to not tell her about the merman part. Your gut told you it would be a bad idea if you did.

“New friends are always good,” your mom replied, letting it slide. “Oh I forgot to ask – how is Sam doing? Did you guys have fun when you saw him?”

You paused from stabbing a piece of asparagus and bit your lip. You had forgotten all about Sam and you slowly put your fork down.

“Um…I didn’t skateboard with him,” you said. “Turns out he forgot all about our hangout and he was going to have lunch with his fiancé.”

“Wow already? Sam must really like this girl,” your mom mused as she raised her glass to take a sip. “Although it’s very unlike him to forget – I thought I remembered him as being very punctual and good with schedules.”

“People change Mom,” you muttered as you continued eating dinner. “May I please be excused?”

She nodded and you thanked her before clearing your plate, kissing her on the forehead.

“Yah Y/N! Didn’t anyone tell you it’s not wise to swim at night?” Baekhyun scolded you as he swam up to the secluded area of the beach you asked him to meet you at. He leaned on a rock and studied your expression. “Everything all right?”

“I just could use a friend if that’s ok,” you admitted as you put down your skateboard. You slipped off your sneakers and socks before tugging your sweatshirt off to reveal your bathing suit.

Baek’s eyes widened and he parted his lips in surprise, a faint blush crossing his cheeks. “Wae? Are you going to come swim with me?”

You nodded as you tied your hair back and began wading into the water, wincing as you tried to adjust to coldness. “How can – FUCK! – you stand thhhhhhiiiiissss?” you asked, teeth chattering.

Baekhyun tried not to laugh at you and he moved away from the rock, trying to swim as close as he could without stranding himself in the shallow waters. He held a hand out to you and you clenched your teeth as you pushed ahead, ignoring the freezing sensation of the water.

“Awww Y/N, come here,” he said as he pulled you close to him in a hug, trying to warm you up. “Is this helping?”

“Mmhm,” you mumbled as you wrapped your arms around his body. “Geez mermen are really warm!”

“I think you mean…hot,” Baek teased.

“Shut up!”

“Okay, okay I’ll stop,” Baek sighed as he rubbed your arms to try to warm them up. “Is something wrong though?”

“I think I’m just stressed about everything,” you murmured. “Everyone’s growing up too fast and I feel like I’m not. Like I’m a failure at being an adult. I mean, I’m still living at home but it’s only because it’s cheaper than school housing and I haven’t worked a real desk job before but –”

“Y/N I still live at home,” Baekhyun interrupted as he took your shoulders and turned you to face him. “I’m one of the youngest in my friends and I haven’t taken any of the mating stuff seriously. I’m not working because my parents aren’t letting me until I find someone. They don’t even support me singing because they think it’s a waste.”

“But Baekhyun you have a beautiful voice,” you said. “I wish others could hear it too.”

“I’m just glad you heard it,” he murmured with a smile. “You’re not alone – remember that. I’m here for you okay?”

You closed your eyes and smiled as you squeezed him in another hug. “I’m here for you too.”

[intergalactic-garbage]

The Eleven Questions

I was tagged by @chocolate-and-fandoms​ and kept procrastinating, so here it finally is!

What would be your perfect Saturday night?

I will obviously not be using any real names of my real life friends in this, though the relationships are very real. Bonus: since I live in a country that is far away from speaking English, I also took the opportunity to create accents.

 Rose’s heart was beating faster than the TARDIS flying through the vortex. She was enormously exited. She checked herself in the mirror for one last time. Her golden hair was styled in a style inspired by one of her favorite actors, Matt Smith. She was wearing a black sleeveless top and skinny jeans, going perfectly together with her black converse. She took her keys from the dusty key box, closed the door and locked it. She turned around, facing the street. She could feel her hand shaking, and wondered why. She was just meeting up with a friend on a weekend, what was the big fuss all about? Rose took a deep breath and when her hands were shaking a bit less, she started walking to the intended place.

 She walked in silence, without headphones. For some reason, she didn’t like to listen to music when walking somewhere. Rose didn’t listen much to music in general, and if she did, it was unbeatably instrumental soundtracks from her favorite shows or movies. She used to listen to twenty one pilots and Melanie Martinez, but she stopped after a while. Their songs were nice, she still liked them, but they weren’t exactly her thing. The soundtracks, on the other hand, spoke to Rose more than any other type of music. With the soundtracks, she was able to recall the exact moment when the song played in an episode, and she could feel the happiness or pain or loss just as the character in it.

 After consulting with herself why Amy Pond was or wasn’t a good companion, she realized that she is almost in her final destination. And then, after more than two long weeks, she saw her best friend. “Amelia!” she called her name as she started running towards her. When the girl with purple glasses and a blonde-ish fringe heard the familiar voice, she looked around herself, and at the sight of Rose, she also started running towards her friend. “Rose!” she called. At last, they’ve met each other in a heartwarming hug.

“So, how have you been?” almost yelled Rose out of pure excitement. “Good?” replied Amelia in her american accent. “AaaAaa and now! I’m gonna tell you about what happened on scouts camp!” said Rose in her British accent. Amelia facepalmed. “Ugh, fine,” she sighed, a little smile appearing on her face. The two girls started making their way to the nearby ice cream stand.

 “So, it was aBSOLUTELY AMAZING!” started Rose. “There were five groups, instead of four, like we have every year, aND I WAS LIKE A LEADER OF ONE OF THEM!” “How much did you suck?” Amelia asked, teasing Rose. ”Surprisingly, not much! I thought that I was really going to suck as a leader because when I’m on scout, I’m always sort of quiet and people can’t understand what I’m saying because I keep muttering, but actually, I didn’t suck as much as I expected! Which is good!” said Rose, waving her hands around herself, gesticulating as she spoke. “And, I actually sorta stopped being shy! And enjoyed it! as much as I could! Wow!”

 The two gals stopped at the ice cream stand and ordered. Vanilla and peach for Rose and chocolate with blueberry for Amelia. They took a walk to the park. Meanwhile, Rose kept talking about scouts camp the whole way. It meant a lot to her. The people, the places, and most importantly the memories. “...Log is like, the gayest person in existence? He and Corn just gotta have some sort of tragic backstory! Corn literally calls him ¨Maty’ which is like the thing only Log’s ex-crush Sara does. Getting that connection there?” continued Rose. She kept talking about all these people from scout. Amelia has heard of them so many times. In her friend’s stories of how Log got her into a show that ended up giving her hope, how Corn and Fiesh wanted to tell her spoilers of that show, how they were on rafts and she fell into the water, how Tuzexx gave her hope when she most needed it. Whenever she told one of those stories, her eyes were gleaming with the passion she spoke with. Amelia loved that sparkle of those eyes.

◇

 “Aaand I guess that’s it!” said Rose, finishing her stories from scout. She looked around herself. The sky was full of so many shades of color. Violet, pink, orange, yellow, blue, and in the middle of it all, a red, burning sun. The grass that the two of the girls were sitting on was starting to get wet. Rose checked her phone for the time. 20:13. She was rambling about scouts for two good hours! “Well, those two weeks, I was just home!” said Amelia in response to Rose’s two week scout camp. She placed her head onto Rose’s shoulder, watching the sky.

◇

 “Amy?” said Rose, breaking the silence. “Did you bring the nachos like we agreed? It’s your turn this time,” Amy opened her bag and after some searching, pulled out a bag of nachos. “I forgot the salsa at home,” she said, opening the nachos. “Nah, it’s okay, I don’t really like salsa that much anyway,” replied Rose. “WHAT? HOW CAN YOU NOT LIKE SALSA?” screamed Amelia. “Dunno, I just enjoy nachos without salsa,” said Rose. The girls then stayed quiet for a bit, watching the stars pop up on the sky, one by one. Amelia’s head was placed again on Rose’s shoulder, who enjoyed this position very much.

◇

 Amy’s phone lit up because of a notification, showing the girls the time. 21:21. Rose noticed this. “It’s 11:11,” she said. “People sometimes say, that if you, you know, make a wish right now, it’ll become true,” Rose said. She closed her eyes and so did Amy. Rose took a deep breath and wished. She opened her eyes and saw that Amy was still wishing. She looked at her and admired her. Absolutely everything about her. She was clever, funny, sarcastic and very sassy. Rose couldn’t have wished for a better companion. Finally, Amy opened her eyes and noticed her friend staring at her. She stared back, and got lost in her beautiful, ocean blue eyes. Rose smiled at Amy. It wasn’t her typical smile, the one she had when she talked about scout or Doctor Who. This smile was different. It was a smile that was shy, yet brave. Rose was always either showing too much of her emotion or barely any. This time, she was breaking the fence holding her emotions back, and finally showed some emotion. All of that emotion, everything she felt was projected onto this smile. And Amy knew it. And so she smiled back.

i hope that wasn’t too bad. I tried my best, hope that was obvious. If you have any negative feedback, you can tell me, I will most probably agree with you.

What’s one thing you want to do this summer?

I would like to watch a lot of shows, mostly Doctor Who, and finish up atleast the seventh season of it. I also wanna read a lot of books, because I don’t have much time for that during the school year.

Who do you admire most? What is it about them that inspires you?

I don’t currently have an idol in that traditional sense of way. But if there’s someone I do admire, it’s three people.

The first is John Barrowman. For those who don’t know, John is a fifty year old actor who I came across when watching Doctor Who, where he plays Captain Jack Harkness. Barrowman is a gay man, but not the stereotypical. Oh, thank god he isn’t the straight person stereotype of a gay person. You see, John is sometimes called “one of us” as the who fans. And that is beyond true. He watched Doctor Who as a small child, and when he, as an adult, got to meet Elizabeth Sladen, he pissed himself out of excitement. I have seen so many recordings from panels featuring Barrowman that I know how wonderfully he treats his fans, how confident he is, how absolutely sassy he is towards the homophobic and sexist comments he or his friends sometimes do get. Just how right his self-esteem is and that he literally doesn’t care if he’s rocking shorts and a t-shirt or a TARDIS dress. John Barrowman is a wonderful man, and without those panels I’ve seen with him, I can for sure say that I would not be who I am.

The other two are Russell T Davies and Steven Moffat. These men, these two extraordinary men have inspired me to write. I am very and fully aware that if I actually want to write quality content, I have an extremely long way to come. Yet still, these two !!! What they’ve created is absolutely mindblowing. Stories, loved by so many and so much and by no one more than me. I love every second of them, every quote, every character, every arch and plot twist. I’m still learning to write, and my grand thanks to people inspiring me to write would go to these two men.

What are your favorite things about your current main fandom?

Even though that Doctor Who is what I watch mostly, it isn’t my main fandom. That will stay to be Steven Universe.

With Steven Universe being Universally known as a fandom full of discourse, it might seem a bit tricky to find positive things about it. But I think that out of those few positive things about the fandom, my favorite is probably the theories. I, for a short time, also used to write theories, but then lost the motivation to make them. But honestly, tHE THEORIES! We make theories about absolutely everything! We get told that Pink Diamond is dead? Well guess what! According to this theory, she’s not! No, wait, she is, but Pearl killed her! We get told that Steven isn’t able to heal corruption, yet we make content everyday on how Jasper gets uncorrupted! I just really love that.

If you could take one trip anywhere in time and space and then safely return, where would you go?

Well, to be honest, I would just go anywhere where I could meet the Doctor. Help him while he’s passing through and maybe become a companion!

If not that, I would probably visit some ancient Rome.

What tradition in your country do you regularly partake in?

We do have these Celebrations (that’s literally what they’re named). It’s a big event in a small part of the country of Czech Republic in which you wear all these fancy clothes like this

and you dance and drink wine and stuff. They also play terrible music.

tip: do not ever try to wear those things. they are uncomfortable as hell

What is one thing that you love about your family?

(It would be much easier to make a list of things I don’t like about them.)

Lots of things! They are great emotional support if they know what the flip is going on, they try to help me with school if I accidentally get in trouble by breaking a toilet during the beta test of my pocket rocket model.

What is one essential trait of a good friendship?

Loyalty. I have only like three very close friends, and we are all people who have been targets of shit talking in the past. (I like that phrase. Shit talking. I should use that more often!) So I expect that if I tell one of my close friends something I want to be just between us, because I maybe aren’t ready to tell everybody else, I assume that the friend will be loyal and not tell anybody. I don’t mean loyalty as the “who hangs out with who” loyalty. I mean “can I trust you with this” loyalty.

Do you have a tattoo? If no, do you want one?

No and no. If you have a tattoo or would like one, please, carry on! I just personally don’t want a tattoo.

What is the one song you currently listen to on repeat?

The Tenth Doctor’s theme. Here’s a link:

https://youtu.be/F2ZX42jK_s8

What is the one song that makes you happy? Tell me about it.

https://youtu.be/3MjdbjONR8k

The Westminster Bridge. You see, Doctor Who means a lot to me. The first time I was watching it, it was magical. Not only did I overcome my fear and finally speak to a person from scout, which I was very scared and shy to do. I also got into a brand new show by talking to them. So the first episode, Rose, was something I adored. I felt great, and that great, fantastic feeling is always getting back to me whenever I hear the soundtrack.

So, that’s it. I just figured that I was actually using the wrong questions, but I’m so tired that I don’t give a damn anymore. I’m tagging @dustdivision​ @heyparadiamonds​ @lapis-of-the-day​ @peridot-of-the-day​ @meepamorphesis​ @squishable-amethyst​ and anyone who would like to participate

[secretagentspydetectiveninja]

The Misadventures of Prince Kim - chapter 14

(aka the royalty AU story)

Not sure how I’ve managed to keep up with this for two whole weeks in a row so far...

[1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13] [AO3]

It was the start of the winter holidays, and most of the students would be going home to their families for these few weeks while the school was shut for renovations and upkeeping. Kim had been asked by his parents to come back home, but he instead wrote them a quick letter informing them that he would be going to stay with Max instead, and left before he could receive a reply. He knew they wouldn’t be happy, but so what? As a prince, surely it was his duty to visit other countries and learn about new places, getting to know other leaders in the meantime!

The journey to Kanté only took two days, unlike the slow week’s travel time it took to get to Lê Chiến. First there was a short trip on an ocean liner, then an overnight maglev train. It was the smoothest kind of train Kim had ever been on in his life.

“Maglev stands for magnetic levitation,” Max informed him while Kim was looking around the sparkly clean insides of the train in wonder. “The train is actually suspended slightly above the tracks using magnetic repulsion, leading to less friction and therefore much faster speeds and smoother travel.”

“Wait a second – do you mean to tell me this train is flying?”

“Well, hovering, yes.”

“That is the coolest thing ever! We need these cool train things in my kingdom too!” Kim ran up to the window and pressed his face against it, looking at the blur of green and yellow outside, passing by too quickly to focus on properly. “How fast are we even going?”

“300 km/h, though there are trains that have exceeded those speeds before.”

“Do you think it’s possible for a human to run that fast too? If they practised really, really hard?”

Max laughed. “Definitely not, Kim, though I know you can certainly run very fast by human standards.”

Reaching the capital city the next morning, Kim was first of all stunned at how tall the buildings were. Not only that, but they seemed to be made out of all sorts of shiny metals and glass, giving a very unique and unconventionally beautiful skyline.

As the train slowed down and made its way through the vast city on little suspended monorails, Kim was able to see that these were not the only types of buildings. There were smaller ones with beautiful architecture, painted in bright colours with mosaic patterns all over them. Max pointed them out and talked about them as they passed.

“That one is the Kubdel Embassy, it has a very stylistic design. That one over there is the National Theatre House, where you can see all sorts of traditional plays and shows. On your left you’ll see the Museum of Modern Art, it’s a very interesting place though I feel like you’re not the sort of person who would be enthusiastic about going there…”

Kim looked down at the street below, which the monorail tracks towered over like a long bridge, and saw that there were cars. Endless rows of cars, in all sorts of bright colours, and people walking around in bright, clear, patterned clothing. He had never seen anything like it. A group of small children looked up at the train and waved, so Kim happily waved back.

“Dude, your kingdom is awesome,” he said to Max. “Like, it’s actually the coolest place I’ve been to, and I thought Bourgeois was nice.”

“You’ve barely even seen this place yet!”

“But it’s so futuristic! You’ve got all these huge skyscrapers, and these magic flying trains, and so many cars there’s traffic, and a city this big it would take days to walk around, and…”

“If you think this is advanced, wait until you see Alix’s kingdom. They’ve got plants growing up the sides of their skyscrapers there. Which is impressive considering that most of her kingdom is desert.”

“You two are the luckiest ever.”

“Not necessarily, I mean, everyone’s kingdom has something special about it. I’m sure your kingdom is a lovely place too. You just like it here because it’s different.”

“Nah, it’s not just that. It looks so… you know, clean. Organized. Like a really nice place to live. Whereas sometimes back home when I’m travelling around by horse carriage I see places that don’t look so good, like I wouldn’t want to live there if my life depended on it. And I want to do something about it, because everyone deserves to live in a cool place like this country.”

“Yes, everyone deserves a nice place to live. Unfortunately this kingdom isn’t without its problems too. Poverty exists everywhere, though we can do our best to help lift as many people out of it as possible. Crime exists everywhere too, and all we can do is try to stop it and prevent it.”

“You seem to be doing a much better job than most other places I’ve been to. Everyone here looks rich.”

“Well, I suppose the city is quite affluent, though I’d say the vast majority of the population are just middle-class…”

The train pulled into the station and slowed to a halt. Kim and Max were ushered down a long red carpet from the train to a waiting vehicle, while porters carried their luggage for them.

“This is such a cool car,” Kim muttered in awe as the chauffeur opened the back door to let them in.

“It’s a limousine, or limo for short,” Max said. “They’re longer than usual cars. As royalty, we get to ride in these by default.”

“Whoa… neat…”

The ride from the station to the palace was fairly short. Stepping out of the limo and into proper daylight, Kim realized that the temperature here was incredibly warm for December, despite being well into the northern hemisphere. He rolled up his sleeves, regretting packing a lot of warm clothes. He wouldn’t need them.

The palace itself was big and painted mostly white to keep it as cool as possible, and the inside was huge and filled with marble pillars, with tiled marble flooring everywhere too. Kim was immediately introduced to Max’s family (who he had met a few times before), then shown to the guest quarters where he would be staying.

Wow… not only did this big, airy room have a brilliant view overlooking this incredible city, but it had an electric ceiling fan. An actual, adjustable, spinning fan that could be controlled by a dial on the wall. Kim spent at least 15 minutes playing around with it, watching as the blades moved quicker and quicker until they were an undistinguishable blur.

Wait, there was a microwave oven in here too??? He had only ever seen pictures of those! He pulled a half-melted chocolate bar out of his pocket, put it in, then closed the door and pressed a few numbers. It started making a whirring noise, and after some seconds it beeped. Opening the microwave door again, the chocolate bar was now a sticky puddle. How awesome!

Over the next few days, it was like living a dream. Max showed Kim all sorts of incredible things that could be seen in this kingdom – electric refrigerators and freezers, sunglasses, clothes made from a strange material called “nylon” (which was somehow a type of plastic, supposedly), and of course, helicopters. There was a helicopter pad on the roof and Max took Kim up to show him this magnificent machine, though they weren’t permitted to fly in it.

It wasn’t just all the modern inventions that made this country interesting. Max also made sure to take Kim sightseeing, though with an armed guard to keep an eye on them and make sure the paparazzi and fans didn’t get too close.

The city had some of the most splendid architecture Kim had ever seen. Many of the more historic buildings, especially the mosques and other places of worship, were so stunning that Kim was tempted to spend all his money on a camera just so he could take pictures of everything and remember it forever. Not just any camera either, but a colour camera, since everything here was so colourful, especially the beautiful robes most people wore.

Max explained while showing Kim around that although most people here spoke French, there were so many other languages spoken too that most people knew at least two or three different ones quite fluently. He also told Kim about how most of this country was either arid or semi-arid, but the rainier areas to the south were used to grow cotton and collect water, while the other areas focused more on scientific research and technology advancements, often collaborating on projects with Kubdel to the northeast.

A few days into the holiday, when Kim was finally getting used to being here, Max sent for him to be woken up fairly early.

“I have a surprise for you today,” he said, as a butler led them to the limousine. “You’ll get to see something really, really cool today.”

“What is it?”

“If I told you then it wouldn’t be a surprise!”

Kim watched out of the tinted windows as the limo set off. They seemed to be heading away from the city, as there were fewer buildings around here and the roads were wide with cars going at high speeds over multiple lanes.

He observed the signs on the sides of the road, and… wait a second, did that one say “airport”?

“You’re taking me to the airport!” Kim gasped. “Oh my gosh, you’re gonna show me what real aeroplanes look like!”

“Yep, that’s it,” Max said, grinning. “You’ll get to see them taking off and landing and I could even show you inside one if you want. And there’s another surprise in store too.”

“I can’t wait!” Kim could barely sit still anymore, bouncing around on his seat and fiddling with the seat belt impatiently.

They arrived at the airport and were immediately taken to the VIP lounge, where there were comfy sofas and a big bar to get drinks and snacks from. Kim, however, ran straight over to the window and stared out of it in amazement.

Those were planes. Those were real planes, right there, parked outside, the ones that flew through the sky like birds. They were huge, way bigger than he had imagined. They had big noses and wings and tails, and hundreds of little round windows dotted across the side, and colourful logos painted onto them…

He watched as one of the planes on a distant runway suddenly accelerated forwards, going faster and faster, tilting upwards slightly, until –

“Max! Max look! That one over there! It just started flying! It’s actually flying oh my gosh –”

“Magical, isn’t it?” Max said, coming to stand beside Kim.

“Yeah! It didn’t even need to flap its wings or anything, it just went WHOOSH and then zoom and then… MAX THAT ONE OVER THERE IS LANDING, ARE YOU SEEING THIS, IT’S LANDING ON TINY WHEELS –”

He couldn’t even express in words how incredible it was. These huge, bulky machines, could actually carry people through the sky! Wasn’t that just the most amazing thing ever? He could stand here for hours, his breath misting up the window, watching the planes going up and down the runway, defying gravity in the most magnificent way possible…

Not too long later, Max tapped him on the shoulder saying, “It’s time for the other surprise now. And, I guess, if you want to see the inside of a plane – a private jet, to be precise – you’ll get a chance to, since it’s just landed.”

“That would be awesome.”

Kim and Max followed one of the airport staff members down a few corridors and then outside. There was a smaller plane here now, with the side of it opened up to reveal cargo crates that were being carried out and put onto transport wagons by staff members.

A portable set of steps had been wheeled over to the door of the plane, providing a pathway to the ground. The door opened and out walked Pharaoh Alix and her pet snake. She quickly waved at Kim and Max and then ran down the steps to see them.

“What are you doing here?” Kim spluttered, suddenly wondering if his hair was okay, was he wearing something sensible, did he have any spots, oh wait of course she wouldn’t care about any of that, but still…

“I flew over with a trade shipment!” she said. “I’m always doing that, I love planes and it means I get to meet up with Max. And you too, this time.”

“Good to see you, Alix!” Max said. “Is your brother here too?”

“Yeah, he fell asleep even though it was only about an hour flight. It takes him like a year to wake up. I mean same, but like, how can you fall asleep on a one hour plane journey?”

Sure enough, Alix’s older brother was just exiting the plane and walking down the steps. He had plastic glasses too, just like Max, and for some reason was wearing a scarf despite the heat.

“This is Jalil,” Alix said. “And Jalil, this is Kim. Kim the Second, I mean.”

“Oh yes,” Jalil muttered, “the one who lost the race.”

“Oh come on, that was ages ago! Give him a break… Anyway Kim, have you ever seen the inside of a plane before?”

Kim shook his head. “Never even seen one in person before today.”

“Seriously?” said Jalil. “Wow Alix, you were right, they are really backwards…”

Alix elbowed him. “Shush, be nice to my best friend!” She started climbing back up the stairs. “Come on, Kim! Take a look at our private jet! Not that all planes look like this on the inside, but the good ones do at least.”

Kim followed her up the steps and into the plane. The inside looked like a modern lounge, with comfortable seats and tables that could be pulled out or stowed away. There were cabinets overhead to store things in and some kind of music was playing, though Kim couldn’t figure out where from. There must be speakers hidden away somewhere.

“Whoa, this is so cool!” he said, looking around at everything. “And what does it feel like when the plane is actually flying? Does it feel like you’re going really fast?”

“Nah, it just feels like normal,” Alix replied. “Unless you get turbulence and it’s a bumpy journey, but otherwise you forget you’re even on a plane.”

“Turbulence?”

“Yeah, like when you’re flying over mountains and stuff and the air is weird and it makes the plane ride bumpy… I don’t know the science, ask Max about that. Or Jalil, he’s an absolute nerd, by the way.”

Kim was barely listening, too busy messing around with the reclining settings on the chair. “Oh yeah, okay. Hey, what sort of trade shipment things were you transporting?”

“Just raw materials this time, nothing too interesting. The good stuff usually goes by train. Speaking of good stuff, they’re working on getting actual televisions installed on aeroplanes next so you can watch movies while you’re flying!”

“What? That’s so cool, and also so unfair.”

“Don’t worry, we’ll get televisions to the rest of the world someday too, okay?”

“I hope so…”

Once Kim had finished having a good look around the plane, they went back outside. Alix and Jalil were accompanying them back to the palace for lunch, and leaving to go back home later on in the day. The limousine was easily big enough to fit them all for the ride back to the city.

“So, do you think you ever want to fly in a plane someday?” Max asked Kim.

“Heck yeah! It looks so fun! When will I get to do that?”

“You could always come to visit my kingdom next holiday, you’ll get to fly in a plane then,” Alix said. “I usually just take the ocean liner from Bourgeois to the northern port and then catch a short flight from there back to where my palace is. If you came along I could show you.”

“Wait, you mean in the spring holidays? Stay? With you?”

“Yeah, if you don’t have to go back home, that is.”

Kim tried not to read too much into that. She was asking him to stay with her for the holidays, it totally wasn’t like that meant anything, of course…

He put on his most casual tone and said, “Sure, that might be, like, a cool idea or something, I guess… whatever…”

“Awesome!”

“Not awesome,” Jalil corrected. “Do you really think dad’s going to be okay with you randomly inviting a friend over for several weeks? He barely let Max stay for two days that one time, remember?”

“It’s fine, he’s warming up to Max so he’ll warm up to Kim too. And plus, that last time was before I was crowned pharaoh. Now I’m in charge so I can do whatever I want.”

“You know that’s not true.”

“Yeah, but I like to pretend it’s true.”

“Are you annoyed that the throne went to your little sister instead of you?” Kim asked Jalil suddenly, but then regretted it the second he’d said it. How tactless was it to ask something like that? Ugh, why did his brain just not work whenever Alix was around?

Luckily Jalil did not seem annoyed at the question. “No, it’s better like this. Ruling a country is a stressful job. At least this way I can choose to pursue careers I’m actually interested in instead. Like studying ancient history.”

Ah, yes. That did sound nerdy. Was that why Alix always got along so well with Max? Did he remind her of her brother somehow? That would explain things.

It was already lunchtime when they reached the palace, so they had lunch together, and then it was time for Alix and Jalil to go back to the airport to catch their flight. Apparently the planes all ran on strict schedules and if someone didn’t turn up in time, they would simply miss the flight. Of course, since Alix and Jalil were royalty their flight would just end up delayed if they weren’t there on time, but it was better not to let that happen or it would mess up the timetable completely. And there was always the possibility of getting caught in traffic in a kingdom like this. It was better to leave early rather than late.

“It was nice to meet you,” Jalil said to Kim. “I guess if you’re coming to stay in spring then I’ll see you then.”

“Yeah, nice to meet you too,” Kim said, though Jalil was already walking off out of the room.

“See you at school, Kim!” Alix gave him a light punch on the arm (or rather, she thought it had been light – it actually did hurt, though Kim would never admit that) and started to leave too.

Kim suddenly remembered something. Was anyone else in here? No, it was just the two of them… well, and that snake on her arm, but Kim the First didn’t seem so scary these days…

“Alix, wait a second,” he said, taking her hand and trying to ignore how flustered he suddenly felt. “I just remembered, um… well you told me to remind you, so… Wait, you don’t still have a cold, do you?”

“Nope.”

“Okay good… so um, remember at the winter party? When there was that mistletoe, and you were ill so we didn’t kiss? I mean, since there’s no one else around I guess we could just do that now… if you want…”

She looked up at him, frowning. Kim started wondering if he had been too obvious that he liked her. What if she was annoyed or something? What could she possibly be thinking about?

“You’re too tall,” she said finally.

Oh, was that it? That wasn’t a big deal, Ivan and Mylène had a height difference too. “I could just–”

Before he could even react, she had somehow hooked her foot round and tripped him over backwards, catching him just before he landed on the floor.

“There we go, that’s better. Now I get to be the tall one for once.”

Kim lay perfectly still, barely even daring to breathe. She was literally holding him in her arms, her face barely a few inches above his own, strands of her pink fringe dangling over his forehead…

She leaned down to kiss him –

– and promptly dropped him just a millimetre away.

“Hey, what was that for?” Kim said, sitting up and rubbing the back of his head where it hit the floor. But then he heard footsteps. Oh, no wonder she had suddenly stopped, but come on! Did someone really have to come along and ruin this right now?

It was Jalil. He popped his head around the door and said, “Come on Alix, what are you waiting for? We have a flight to catch!”

“Yeah, I know, sorry,” she said quickly. “I was just, uh… fighting Kim. And I totally won.”

“That’s not true!” Kim said, jumping to his feet.

“Anyway Kim I’ve really gotta go now so goodbye, I’ll see you at school, just remind me about that other thing some other time, okay?”

“Okay…”

She hurried out of the room and Jalil closed the door.

Kim sighed. He had been so close. He was so sure it was going to happen that time. But still, he just couldn’t figure out her opinion on all this. Did she even want to kiss him? She didn’t exactly seem enthusiastic, but she didn’t seem annoyed either, just… apathetic. Almost as if she didn’t even care one way or another. But how?

He was still thinking about it when Max came to visit him in his room later.

“Max, I was this close to kissing her,” Kim said straightaway, holding his fingers up just a tiny bit apart. “But then her brother interrupted us, so she had to leave…” He lay back on the bed, staring up at the ceiling fan. “Maybe this was what Master Fu meant when he told me not to get my hopes up. That it’ll take a hundred years for it to finally happen.”

Max sat down on the bed beside him. “Kim… why don’t you just tell her how you feel? Ask her out?”

“I still don’t really feel like asking anyone out, Max. Not after Chloé. And anyway, it’s okay, Alix is my friend and I like it that way. I don’t mind. I’m just glad she likes hanging out with me.”

“Trust me, I can definitely understand that feeling,” Max said, chuckling a little. “That’s fair enough. Anyway, I was going to ask… do you want to go bowling? We have plastic skittles.”

“Plastic skittles!” Kim sat up so fast the blood rushed out of his head. “Yes please, that sounds so awesome!”

“Alright then, let’s go!”