#I think after the kira case Near just starts trying out a whole bunch of different hobbies in addition to his already many existing ones

[numbuh424]

Near is so unbothered because he has hobbies. literally solved the biggest murder case in human history all while crafting, playing, building, and collecting. actual king of having hobbies. reblog this with a hobby you think Near would have.

[omegawolverine]

idk anything about death note but wanted to send an ask so, uhhhhhhh, what's it about/favorite part? - 🐝✨

okay so "short" answer to what its about: high school genius light yagami finds a notebook that gives him the ability to kill people as long as he knows their name and face (they can be killed in basically any way possible but light specifically kills people using heart attacks, unless he doesn't want their deaths linked to all the other ones). at first he uses his powers to try and rid the world of all criminals but eventually he develops a god complex and just starts killing anyone who gets in his way as well, no matter how innocent they are. pretty early on the smartest detective known to man, L, figures out its light but has no real proof of it bc 1) the proof would be a supernatural fucking notebook with names of criminals in it and 2) light is actually fucking smart and is far too paranoid to just get caught lol. so basically the first half of the anime is just light and L being gay for each others big brains, having questionable if not straight up horrid morals and investigating Kira (the name light was given by fans of the unknown killer) together despite L straight up telling light he thinks he's Kira. 2nd half is more complicated and a lot more spoilery when explained "in short" so I wont really say anything about it, just in case u wanna watch it at some point. all u really need to know about the 2nd half is that at first it seems unsatisfying and kinda bad, but after a few rewatches you come to the realization that it actually Makes Sense and was a very fitting ending for both the show and characters like Light, L, etc.

now for favorite part, theres a lot, but I'll just name a few that I either find fucking hilarious or just think are actually good story wise. warning, theres big spoilers on the first three lol

for starters, L deadass came from an organization of orphans who were essentially picked up by two old rich men—with, again, some questionable pretty questionable morals—and then groomed to be a bunch of tiny geniuses that could carry on as L if and when the real L dies which raises a lot of questions like. okay so did watari and roger (the two rich orphanage runners) just decide to ONLY pick up orphans with off the charts test scores or whatever or did they just fucking kill peoples parents when they found out they had a genius child? and if it was the first, how did they find so many genius fucking orphans who were just willing to stick around and play into the whole possibly becoming L thing after the age when they can legally leave? bc like, they're fucking geniuses, they have to realize how not only dumb it is to just waste away their lives thinking they might someday make it, but also it's just like,, THEYRE GENIUSES AND THEY CHOSE TO BECOME A GLORIFIED COP? THEY CHOSE TO IDOLIZE A MAN WHO THEY KNOW NOTHING ABOUT EXCEPT THAT HE IS SMART AND ONLY DOES CASES THAT HE FINDS ENTERTAINING? HELLO????

um. moving on, I like that basically all the characters are either morally grey or just straight up have bad morals but since they're Smart Detective Man, people act like they're good. Like, L straight up says he only does cases he finds interesting and entertaining, which is fucked up. he also has shown multiple times that he straight up prioritizes being right over the lives and wellbeing of others. but bc hes a super smart detective man who every once in a great while shows some empathy, people just act like he isnt deadass a Bad Cop With Brains. on the other hand tho, we have Mello, my sweet fucking angel, who people only see as anger issues and inferiority complex when like. while he does enjoy being right and will be majorly pissed when somebody else wins over him, he also put aside a long time grudge he had against near to help him solve the Kira case, literally providing him with everything he needed in the end to wrap things up. near literally says that without mello sacrificing himself for the case, he wouldnt have caught light, but people just saw that he kidnapped sayu yagami, or that he killed a few people along the way, and decided he was Only Bad when he literally did all that to further the case which would ultimately stop the greatest serial killer of their lives.

oh, I also personally think its fucking hilarious that a huge reason why L could never catch light imo is bc he was too busy being horny on main for lights big brained plans. like I dont think that's what the author was trying to make it seem like but the more times i rewatch it, the more it just kinda seems like "hm, maybe if L DIDNT add light, his prime suspect, to the investigation and then KEEP HIM AROUND UP UNTIL HE DIED, AND THEN NOT PICK A SUCCESSOR SO LIGHT BECAME THE NEW L BY DEFAULT, maybe this wouldnt have all happened :) just maybe tho :)"

annnnnnd lastly, I like how basically all the characters are (in my opinion) either queer or neurodivergent coded. and also that just basically all of the fans now are queer neurodivergents as well. really feels like home :>

[excorcismic]

ALRIGHT SO HERE’S THE DEAL ; if misa is my first favorite death note character , this angy kid right here is my second - i adore mello to pieces and he’s very close to misa in terms of how much i love him , but ultimately does she remain queen . but ! the cool thing is that in the series they never actually interact ( the closest being mello spying on her for a brief period of time ) which means i could play my two blonde fashion icons and voila , here they are . so here’s the gist on mello in canon & alucard and most importantly the plots i am digging bc my muse for him rn ?? is off the charts . LESGO !

IN A CANON NUTSHELL ( HUGE DEATH NOTE SPOILERS ) : So Mello’s introduced during the latter half of Death Note ( or maybe it’s more the final third but either way there’s a part where it significantly breaks in two ) - or , the very end of the first half , takes center stage during the second . He’s from the original home of the detective L , an orphanage of gifted children known as Whammy’s House - and essentially , the goal of the children is to maybe one day live up to L , one person taking his place . Mello !! Is one of the candidates . But he has a permanent chip on his shoulder since Near - the other candidate - always managed to beat him at everything . So when Light Yagami gets his way & L dies , Near and Mello are told that L didn’t choose a successor between them . When the idea that they work together to do just that is brought up , Near ( who honestly really liked Mello ) is like ‘hey! let’s do it’ and Mello ( still angy that Near is always right in front of him ) is like ‘FUCK you I’m gonna catch Kira myself’ and leaves the orphanage . Five years later , he works with the mafia , even getting his hands on a Death Note & with the help of a shinigami ( that he scared the living piss out of ) concludes that a rule that states a human will die if they haven’t written in the notebook in thirteen days is fake . He also like , blackmails the president and orchestrates an explosion that Soichiro Yagami dies after but he gets a wicked ass scar afterwards so it’s okay . Now working with L’s third potential successor , Matt , he spies on Misa Amane and makes connections between the second L ( Light Yagami ) & Kira , deduces that Kiyomi Takada is an accomplice , and kidnaps her to try and expose Kira as Light Yagami - but . . . he dies in the process , and so does Matt . The cool thing is though his discoveries led to Near’s breakthrough in the Kira case ( as he and Near met one last time , where he gives Mello the photo he has here in Alucard ) and Mello kind of gets the last laugh post-mortem . And also a kind of neat thing , his last appearance is as the narrator in the Death Note prequel , the Los Angeles BB murder cases - I’m gonna quote the whole thing in my eventual intro but ! It’s an awesome book and Mello is an awesome narrator . ( dn spoilers end here tyvm )

IN AN ALUCARD NUTSHELL - So Mihael Keehl ( his real name in canon , mind you ) is a twenty year-old runaway from the foster system - also sometimes lived in an orphanage but when he wasn’t , the constant tossing around because of his rebellious tendencies wrecked him . He isn’t employed , not does he actually have an actual home - living in a beat down truck most of the time if he can’t get a motel / hotel room for a night or a few . He makes basic expenses and fills his basic needs by doing odd jobs in exchange for money or favors - stuff like ‘if I do this for you for x amount of days or I get this for you you’ll pay for my phone bill for the next two months’ and that stuff . Basic arrangements . And he knows he can like , maybe try to commit to a job or a home but he’s actually . . . way too fucking scared of being tied down or in a worse situation that’s somehow more stable so the nomad life is kind of what he sticks with . But he’s homeless & it’s not good for him . At all . He’ll never flat-out admit that though which is why he calls himself a drifter . His main reason for being on his own , and refusing any extensive help from anyone outside of these favors , is because he has a point to prove - because that inferiority complex kicks in because the other kids he grew up against are doing amazing things and he wants to do better , and not receive any large amount of help . He just ,,, doesn’t understand he’s not doin’ any good for himself .

BUT OOOOOOOH YOU WANNA PLOT WITH MELLO SO BAD OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

so the biggest connection in the sense that it’s the most open , i mentioned that mello mainly pays for his own expenses ( or more so , gets other people to pay for them ) by doing favors or small jobs in exchange for either money or other forms of payment . so obviously , people he has these arrangements with - they can range from anything , mello is extremely smart ( a thing that comes up is that he has a shit ton of wasted potential ) in the books , technology , the streets and has a bunch of small talents he’s picked up over the years of living on his own ( saving money , sewing and mending / caring for clothes how else is he gonna keep that amazing fashion , cooking with very little ingredients , cleaning with little tools , fixing the kinks / souping up automobiles , ahem sexual stuff , tutoring , sometimes even mild illegal shit , you name it . ) so he can offer these talents / skills / etc . to other people who could use them ( most of the time repeatedly ) and in exchange , the other muses will pay him in cash or by doing things like paying his phone bill , car insurance , health insurance , food / groceries , hotel/motel room for a few nights , or even just offering him a place to use the shower or bathroom or even a bed for certain days of the week . This can also lead to many of the other plots I have listed here in the sense it’s a start , and it can happen with anyone , anywhere , for any reason .

literally the thing w/ mel is that he knows no limits and will do anything for anyone and is hardheaded as fuck about it because he’s got a point to prove and things to do and he won’t waste time refusing but the moment you offer your help in exchange for nothing or you’re trying to hold his hand a little too much and he catches on , the arrangement’s over and you’ll be lucky to see him again .

okay so uh . in that sense ?? maybe ppl who kind of helped him out and he did like . one thing for them and once he got his payment for that one thing he kinda bounced n they never heard from him again for whatever reason . nothing against them but he rly isn’t gonna make a habit of staying in one place for too long . 

obviously , those people that really think he’s gotta give up the ghost of trying to survive like this bc it’s wearing on his health & he doesn’t wanna admit it . and he’s tried shaking them off but he won’t leave and sometimes he’s forced to give into the help they offer but tries making them take a payment back .

old peers that felt whatever way about him back then but feel pity for his wasted potential ( at the moment ) , bc this dude was like . . . a straight-a student and was rly good at a bunch of things and now he’s living the way he is . whatever they wanna do and however they felt about him and how he interacted with them back then Differs but . there’s kind of like ‘damn u live like this’ now . gimme some kids who had crushes on him , kids he was rivals with , kids he got into fights with and maybe socked in the jaw a few times , kids who always admired him , kids who hated his guts - it always comes down to what life is like now vs. what life was like then .

i’d like some friends who were formed from the favors - and maybe they’ve stopped whatever they had with him but they still regularly hang out or something , maybe offer a place to stay for the night . 

just in general ?? people who keep their home open for him and whether he takes them up on their offer on a rare basis .

pls some folks trick him into accepting their help like leave him basket of chocolate candy and trap him or something like just . make it ‘wait what’ deal bc they all know he’s stubborn .

also uh . he’s been arrested for minor offenses a few times so some ppl who’ve bailed him out pls and he’s tryna repay him back .

mentor figures . mentor figures pls he’s trying not to accept their mentor-y guidance from .

so maybe the hero  . . . maybe the one person who was like the l to mello of alucard ( maybe even the Man himself ) that he just . looked up to forever and probably still does .

. . . favor idea ?? maybe he’s a stand-in boyfriend or date for events or somethin’ like mello kinda has that bad boy reputation but maybe he dated them for show on their whim at some point or they have that kinda thing ‘pls pretend to my boyfriend and i’ll let u use my shower every weekend for the next month’ or so .

also , one night stands or friends with benefits he uses only for the bathroom / a place to sleep . folks he’s dated for a period bc he did feel something and therefore he had them as an outlet but then broke up with them ( most likely ?? he was the one who ended it bc he has never known love stability & got spooked on it ending and just - did it on his own accord before he could further get hurt BUT THAT NEVER WORKS and he has hella commitement issues ) and tried to shrug it off as ‘ just another fling ’ even tho he’s highkey sad over it . ppl he’s slept with and then disappears with only a ‘thank you’ note as the evidence he was there . and do they accept it ?? are they pissed over it ?? that is up to You but it’s probably gotten around that mihael keehl has never had a stable relationship and never , ever stays . 

lots of ppl he probs has the above two arrangements or scenarios with bc again , gotta get shit done somehow .

enemies . . . he has an endless grudge with for some reason like maybe they screwed him over , 

i want . . . folks he can eventually get soft with and maybe actually seek that comfort in even tho u gotta chip at the five thousand concrete walls to get to that stage . i want to see him become better and that’s an ultimate goal for him in alucard ( even though it’s gonna be a bit more difficult with his memories returning ) to get better , commit to something , accept stability and get his life on a better track .

and yes , that includes an eventual ship ! really it can build off of any of these dynamics just . give me sneaking in through windows late at night , soft words and gentle kisses and protective hugs and please stay i know you never stay but please stay with me and the thought that maybe he should leave but he doesn’t and they wake up with him after a night and he’s still there and maybe there’s a scare he left like he always does but he made chocolate chip pancakes and he feels safe & alright which is . . . a rare occasion in his messy ass life . maybe something like friends to lovers , fwb to lovers , an old flame , anything this could be fun to do !! end goal though , i’d like something on the softer side that’s healthy and loving because that’s really what he needs . 

( some notes tho bc he’s only twenty i’ll sayyyy max i’ll do the more romantic / spicier stuff with in that aspect is . . . 23 - 24 ?? bc he’s almost 21 like if we put the fact we’re in october into account and his birthday is december 13th that isn’t too far away so . That’s That . he’s also pan as fuck . )

BUT , yes . the main connections / plots there are what i can think of . ik a lot of these are so wordy and i’m sorry bt as always ! i will take literally anything i love plots and i think with what i have for mello there is so much potential in what we can do here .

and as always . give me other death note characters . near or matt specifically would fucking make me cry and i’m here for it .

[harriet-tuttle]

Highlights from Mark Watches Death Note

Episode 1

Ryuk is… well, he could be on a friendly baking show, and I’d still be terrified of him. HE LOOKS LIKE WHAT I THINK ALL CLOWNS LOOK LIKE: ENDLESSLY FRIGHTENING.

Episode 2

I mean, word of advice, Light: stop acting like an arrogant teenager who discovered Ayn Rand or something. FREE ADVICE FOR YOU, DUDE.

Episode 3

Watari stands by the laptop that’s connected to L, which has to be the most boring job imaginable.

Episode 4

He stops viewing these people as humans and instead seems them entirely as pawns. They’re good for nothing more than his goal: to rid the world of all criminals and create a utopia. What utopia that might be is left unsaid, not because the show is trying to hide it from us, but because Light probably hasn’t even decided what it’s going to be.

Seriously, Light is the worst. (That is an odd sentence to type. Makes it sound like I hate electricity or something.)

Episode 5

Initially, I was convinced that he just wanted to misdirect Penber. That was easy to do, and after Penber got off the bus, I figured that was it.

But no.

Nope.

NOT AT ALL.

Episode 6

L ACTUALLY SMILED. (That was my single favorite moment in the whole episode.)

Episode 7

When we’re not focusing on how Light is THE LITERAL WORST PERSON IN THE UNIVERSE, Death Note gives us more of the relationship between L and the police officers who have won his trust.

Episode 8

So how will the future of this anime look? I don’t think you can sustain this kind of back-and-forth for nearly thirty episodes, especially since Death Note is already barreling forward as it is. Will Light slip up and reveal something about himself to L? Is there a third party I haven’t met yet that will mess things up? And what of the very strange subplot involving Ryuk’s withdrawal from apples? Was that there to drop a hint about the shinigami, or was it weird just for the sake of it? (I realize I’m asking for background information on a floating reaper who looks like a clown, so… whatever.)

Episode 9

I honestly thought that L and Light wouldn’t meet until well past the halfway mark because… well, that’s why all the tension existed! Neither of them were ever in the same physical space, and they were exacting a war against each other from a distance.

That’s why L’s actions are so fucking flagrant and brilliant. No one expected this. Not me, not Light, PROBABLY NOT ANY OF YOU.

Episode 10

Even if he has Light investigate himself, it only means that he’ll eventually lead them straight to him anyway. It’ll happen either through his fantastic deductive work, or Light will give away something to the team. But does that mean that L will have to introduce Light to the other officers on the task force? That seems like a bad idea

Episode 11

Somehow, Kira had killed Ukita without knowing his real name. Understandably, EVERYONE FREAKS OUT. THAT INCLUDED ME. How? How had Light been able to do this while standing in his bedroom? He couldn’t have possibly known who would show up to the police station. But let’s say he did. “Assault” takes things a step further when Light’s father drives a bus into the station. Will Light risk killing him if he discovers who drove the bus? Oh, but let’s take this a step further: two random cops who show up to deal with the police bus that sits in the lobby ARE KILLED. There is a 0% chance that Light knew their names, so how? HOW???

Episode 12

There’s so much going on in this episode that I was positive the show would cut away right before Second Kira’s shinigami revealed how to kill him. Why would they reveal something this huge so early into the show? Because Death Note doesn’t give a shit about me, and I was shocked to watch an extended flashback sequence play out.

Episode 13

In the thirteenth episode of Death Note, I will repeat myself endlessly while reviewing this: HOW DOES IT KEEP ESCALATING.

I just have to expect this show to throw me into an abyss every episode. I just have to do this to survive.

Episode 14

At the very least, I don’t think Misa will last much longer because she’s too much of a risk to Light. IT’S GONNA HAPPEN, I’M CALLING IT.

Episode 15

I get that catching Kira is a big deal for all of these people, and I’m happy that they all believe that Kira’s murders are 100% wrong. Does that mean they should be allowed to do something like this to a teenage girl??? No, not at all!!! It’s horrifying! Did they feed her? Anything???

Episode 16

NOW I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHO THIS SHOW IS ABOUT. WHAT THE FUCK.

Episode 17

As for Light? Well, he’s now handcuffed to L. FOR TWENTY-FOUR HOURS A DAY. (Major BOOOOO to that weird-ass line where Misa calls them gross because boys shouldn’t be handcuffed together? Yuck.)

[N.B.: This is the first and only remark by Mark Oshiro, Gayest Reviewer on Planet Earth, that in any way acknowledges subtext between Light and L. Behold the glory of this non-barking dog, my psychotic fandom.]

Episode 18

At this point, does L even suspect anyone else aside from Light and Misa? No, not really, even when he guesses (correctly!) that Kira’s “power” can jump from one person to the next. I don’t think L will ever take his eye off of Light for the remainder of the show.

Episode 19

In the nineteenth episode of Death Note, I really loved this, and MATSUDA IS GREAT.

Episode 20

Yet this is where the main schism happens. L, unsurprisingly, wants to follow the option that allows his theories to be proven. That’s who he is. He’s nearly as averse to being impulsive as Light, so he doesn’t want to move ahead with an arrest UNLESS he can prove every bit of his hypothesis. In this case, that means letting people die, despite knowing that these men are going to use Kira to kill them. There is a tragic irony in the fact that Light finds this plan abhorrent because DUDE, YOU HAVE KILLED MORE PEOPLE THAN ANYONE ELSE IN THIS DAMN SHOW.

Episode 21

However, then she stated that she wanted to do something to get even closer to Light and impress him.

HOW WAS A DATE WITH HIGUCHI GOING TO HELP HER DO THAT? Oh, Mark, YOU DON’T GET IT.  Look, the very nature of Death Note means I’m always going to act like a fool whenever someone tells the truth.

Episode 22

Look, I kept thinking that EVERYTHING was going to go wrong. When Light called the Yotsuba men, I was certain they’d spoil the plan. Then I thought that Higuchi wouldn’t actually go through with murdering Matsuda. And then, as each piece fell into place, the tension got worse because WHAT IF HE ACTUALLY REVEALS HOW HE KILLS? How is Misa going to react to that?

Episode 23

How the hell are there fourteen more episodes??? HOW???

Episode 24

I’m so nervous about this development, though, because it allows Light to be completely free of the investigative team. Oh, sure, he’ll probably stick around so he can monitor everything, keep these people from getting close to him, but now? He’s won, hasn’t he? At least for the time being. However, there are now a bunch of variables and chaotic factors just sitting around. All these detectives and cops and investigators all know the truth of the Death Note. (Well, except that Light lied about one of the rules that governs the notebook. HE IS SO EVIL, Y’ALL.) How are they going to approach this case knowing the truth? I bet that Light will start killing criminals in the next episode, and I don’t know how this will progress from there. Don’t they all know way too much? Can’t they use the knowledge they have of the Death Note to be better detectives? How many red herrings will Light give them to keep them busy?

I am comfortable stating that something like that can’t last forever. Something will have to come crashing down. What could that be???

Episode 25

What the hell is wrong with this show.

Episode 26

Y’all, Death Note doesn’t even fuck around when it comes to CLIP EPISODES.

Episode 27

WELL, THIS IS HOW THERE ARE MORE EPISODES OF THIS SHOW. THE DEATH NOTE IS INTERNATIONAL NOW, AND LIGHT IS GONNA GET FUCKED UP. Episode 28

The elaborate, complicated, and utterly ridiculous means that Mello and his men go to in order to obtain the Death Note is significant because, as I said before, no one had been able to truly best Light. Ever. Ever. L tried, and LOOK WHERE THAT GOT HIM. (I miss him.) But Mello comes out of nowhere, concocts a truly absurd method to get what he wants, and executes it flawlessly. Seriously, let’s go over this. He:

orchestrates the quietest hijacking of an airplane ever, all so that it can land somewhere in the middle of the desert in America and then continue on to its final destination of Los Angeles. (Can you imagine how fucking terrifying that must have been if you were on that plane? IT LANDED IN THE DESERT!!!! Good lord, they’re probably all traumatized now.)

is fully aware that Soichiro will be monitored by satellite, so the entire swap is UNDERGROUND IN A SECRET BUNKER THAT SOME GANG OR MAFIA ONCE USED.

has his man utilize a revolving door that is so deviously brilliant that I can’t even believe a human thought of it.

has that same man making the trade test out the Death Note before accepting it

then has two separate “vehicles” leave the compound at the same time so that those surveilling him don’t know which one has the Death Note on it.

makes one of the vehicles a missile. I cannot even remotely exaggerate here, y’all. A missile. A MISSILE.

I THOUGHT LIGHT WAS RIDICULOUS AND OVERLY-DETAILED ABOUT HIS PLANS, BUT HE HAS CLEARLY MET HIS MATCH.

Episode 29

(Does that mean he gave up half his life AND HE ONLY HAD A FEW HOURS LEFT ANYWAY? Good god.)

Episode 30

In order to subvert what Near is doing, he turns the President against the SPK and has him PUBLICLY DECLARE THAT THE U.S. WILL NOT PURSUE KIRA. He knows that everyone is afraid of him, so the threat against the President’s life is easy. It’s a no-brainer. But when Near gets a little too close to the truth, Light takes matters a step further, unleashing Demegawa’s dogma as a weapon. He stokes the flames of anger and resentment, and he lets this man loose on the airwaves, and A GIANT CROWD OF PEOPLE ARE BREAKING INTO SPK HEADQUARTERS TO OSTENSIBLY MURDER EVERYONE THERE AND HOW IS THIS A MORAL, PEACEFUL WORLD, LIGHT? PLEASE ANSWER THAT.

Episode 31

But how? How does Light slip up so terribly after meticulously constructing this entire existence meant to protect him?

I think the answer to that can be found in the way that Near behaves. It’s so much clearer now that Near is NOTHING like L, and his brash, aggressive manner speaks to that. I believe Light composed his master manipulation with L in mind. There was a code of sorts that L followed. Near, however, doesn’t give a shit. He really doesn’t.

Episode 32

WELL. I said that I wasn’t sure why Mikami had been introduced to us so suddenly and without a real sense for who he is, AND THUS, I GOT THIS EPISODE.

Episode 33

She then requests five pages of the Death Note and tells him to continue killing people with a “fake” notebook. Which makes no sense to me! How can Mikami kill anyone if his notebook is fake? Perhaps I misunderstood this, and Mikami scheduled out deaths in order to cover himself. But what did he do with the real Death Note? Hide it? Give it back to Light? Of course, all of this is useless to talk about if Mikami didn’t actually do as he was told. HOW THE FUCK DID MIKAMI KILL THAT MAN ON THE TRAIN? How?????? I DON’T GET IT.

Episode 34

Credit for that goes to Gevanni, who was given one of the most difficult tasks on the whole team. Surveilling Mikami had been bad enough, but he’s asked to break into the man’s locker at the gym and touch the Death Note. IT’S SO TERRIFYINGLY RISKY, ISN’T IT. Yes, it’ll give him the power to see a shinigami, but Ryuk could be RIGHT THERE. Watching him. READY TO WARN MIKAMI ABOUT HOW CLOSE THE SPK ARE.

Bless that man’s heart. That whole sequence was terrifying.

Episode 35

I’m still struggling to understand why he did it. Why kidnap Takada? If his goal was to catch Kira before Near did, then I suppose he was trying to draw Kira out by kidnapping someone associated with him. As Kira’s spokesperson, Takada was the only person that Mello had access to who could make this goal of his a reality.

Lord, does he underestimate EVERYTHING, though. Kidnapping a high-profile media personality was bad enough. Did he think no one would follow him or figure out a way to locate Takada? However, it’s Takada’s resourcefulness that ends up taking Mello down. I still don’t know how this fits in with Light’s plan for Mikami. Does he have a fake Death Note or not? We do see what Takada does with one of the pages that Mikami gave her, but I’m also a little confused by that, too. As far as I understood it, Light genuinely did not expect her to have that page, nor did he think she would use the Death Note to kill anyone if she was ever captured. Indeed, that’s part of the conversation that they have over the phone near the end of the episode. Light refers to a vague “plan” that he had discussed with Takada about what should happen if she were captured. Which was???? We don’t ever find out because she made her own choice.

Episode 36

The show drags this moment out to an impossible length, and even if it’s seriously unbelievable (WAY MORE THAN THIRTY SECONDS PASSED, COME ON), it’s compelling and nerve-wracking. This is it. There’s no leaving that room unless one side wins. You know, Death Note has been fairly cynical along the way, so if it ends with Light’s victory, I wouldn’t necessarily be surprised. But I want Near to reveal that he knew this would happen because… well, I want to see Light pay for what he’s done. I want to see him fall from his unnatural height because he’s played with human lives as if they are nothing more than pieces of garbage to be discarded as he saw fit.

I want Near to bring justice to this world because Light has no idea what justice is.

Episode 37

I found it incredibly powerful that after thirty-six episodes of this man proudly and defiantly claiming that he was at the head of a moral mission to protect the world from evil, Near called him a murderer. IT IS ABSOLUTELY THE BEST SINGLE EXCHANGE IN THE ENTIRE EPISODE, PERHAPS THE WHOLE SERIES. In just a few sentences, Near obliterated Light’s logic. He called him a serial killer and a murderer and refused to accept a single shred of this man’s terrible logic. I LOVE IT SO MUCH, EVERYONE. I think it’s a perfect lead-in to what comes next: Matsuda’s reaction. After Near so brilliantly dissected what was wrong with Light, I believe that Matsuda broke. And honestly, I don’t think there was a better choice of a character to finally go up against Light and to fatally harm him. Look at his transformation! He went from the goofy, underused investigator to the man who wanted desperately to be seen, to be respected. Then, as L was killed and Kira became an undeniable part of the world, he turned into a fanboy. He began to support the idea of Kira, perhaps not totally, but enough to be entertained by the drama that unfolded around him. He couldn’t take the case seriously because… well, did anyone take it seriously?

So when he found out that he’d been played, that the killer they’d been searching for the whole time was right next to him, he snapped. This story belonged to Matsuda, and it’s about the best closure I could ask for.

This was a fun journey, y’all, and now I know why people had been recommending me this show for so many years. I UNDERSTAND.

[sakura-warrior]

Instead of Glass, There Was Ice: Chapter 3

So after nearly a year of not updating (yikes), I decided to work on the next chapter of this fanfic. 

In case you need a bit of a refresher or are new to the story, here are the links to the previous chapters:

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3:

Hinamori barely got any sleep that night. Whenever she’d try to close her eyes, flashbacks of the last 24 hours would jolt her awake. Memories of the Aizen’s letter… the trial… and of her childhood friend, surrounded by a bunch of unconscious bodies with an indifferent look on his face…..

That last one hurt the most.

When it was finally time for her to get up and get ready for the long day ahead of her, she did so with little enthusiasm. In fact, her body seemed to move on its own out of habit, her mind elsewhere. She barely even heard the repeated knocks on her door, confirming if that she was ready for the day’s journey. And when she finally mustered up the courage to open the door and face the day, she was met with two unfamiliar faces who looked like they’d much rather drag her to the Maggot’s Nest then escort her to the world of the living. And Hinamori was pretty sure that they were only the first set of unwelcoming faces that she was going to have to face before the day was over.

Without so much as a word, the two guards abruptly turned around and began to walk back along the corridors of the 5th division. They didn’t even bother to look back once to see if Hinamori was actually following along behind them as they made their way to their next destination. Though the idea of simply not following them did cross her mind, the lieutenant was quick to shrug it off and join her escorts. As rude their behaviour was, at least they didn’t try to handcuff her like the criminal they assumed she was.

During their walk to the gate, Hinamori couldn’t help but notice the looks she getting. Although she tried her best to resist the temptation to look around, she still managed to catch the odd glimpse of people stopping and whispering to each as she walked by. And although she couldn’t hear what exactly they were saying, it didn’t take a prodigy to know that it wasn’t anything nice.  

When the gate finally came into view, Hinamori was shocked to see two faces that she actually recognized, both of which were shooting reassuring smiles her way.

“Hinamori-kun, you’re finally here!” Kira yelled as he waved her over. “I was starting to think you weren’t going to show!”

“Um, Kira, I don’t think she had much of a choice” Abarai replied with a quick sigh before turning to face his newly arrived friend. “It looks like you’ve had one hell of rude awakening this morning” he added as he shot a quick glance at Hinamori’s escorts. “Don’t worry, you don’t look that terrible”.

Before Hinamori could respond, she was tackled from behind and pulled into a hug. “Don’t be rude, Abarai” a feminine voice said. “Even with only a few hours of sleep, she still looks much better than you.”

“R-Rangiku-san?” Hinamori stuttered. “You’re coming too?”

“Yup!” Matsumoto happily replied, giving the fifth division lieutenant quick squeeze before letting her go and facing her. “You didn’t think I was going to let you guys go on a trip without me, did you?”

Hinamori didn’t know what to say. For the last few hours, she had felt so utterly alone. Her world falling apart around her. And now, she was surrounded by nothing but warm and welcoming faces… Surrounded by people who truly cared about her and believed in her...

She then thought that maybe, just maybe, things might be okay.

“Oops, looks like we missed the heartful reunion, Kuchiki-san” a playful voice stated, breaking the loving atmosphere in the air. “And here I was so looking forward to it. Oh well!”

Hinamori suddenly felt a pit in her stomach. Turning around, she saw Ichimaru and the younger kuchiki sibling walk towards them. All it took was one look at the 3rd division captain’s face to be reminded of the situation she was in and how she had gotten into it. Out of all the available captains of the 13 court guard squads, why did their supervising captain have to be him? Could her luck get any worse?

“Looks like we’ll be relying on your human expertise for this one, Rukia” Abarai said with a smirk as he broke the tension in the air and greeted his childhood friend. “Try not to screw it up, okay?”

“Oh, please, Renji. We all know the only screw up here is you” the short girl quick replied with a smirk of her own. “Trust me, no one understands humans better than I do.”

“Alright, everyone, let’s get moving” Ichimaru stated as he ushered everyone towards the gate. “We have a long day ahead of us, after all.”

With one last look at the word she was leaving behind, Hinamori joined the rest of her comrades and stepped through the gate to commenced her journey to the world of the living.

Once they got their gigais at Urahara’s shop, Kuchiki informed them all of the cover story she came up with for their mission. In order to blend in with normal human society, she suggested that she, Kira, Abarai, Hinamori, and Matsumoto should pose as high school students at the school Kurosaki Ichigo and his friends attended. Ichimaru, due to his older looking appearance, would pose as the school’s new teacher. This way, not only would they be able to blend in, but it also meant that they would be constantly near the substitute shinigami, who Kuchiki assured would gladly help out if anything happened.

Hinamori wouldn’t have described Kurosaki as “happy to help” when the group of them dropped by his school unannounced, but that was just her opinion….

When the lunch bell rang to signal their one hour break, Hinamori was quick to try and get out of the stuffed classroom. With the chaos their busy morning getting settled into the world of the living, she needed some down time to herself. But when she tried to leave the classroom unaccompanied, she was stopped by a chilling voice.

“Now, now, Hinamori-kun, where do you think you’re going?” Ichimaru called as he approached her with one of his infamous smiles. “Don’t ya know you’re not supposed to be on your own? We can’t risk anything bad happening to our lovely little hostage- I mean comrade, now, can we?”

“Ichimaru-tai- Err, I mean, Ichimaru-sensei is right!” Kira was quick to add in before Hinamori could reply. “What if he hurts you when you’re alone?! There’s no way I’m letting that filthy traitor get his hands on you, Hinamori, so don’t you worry about a thing!”

It took all the strength Hinamori had not to snap at Kira. How could he possibly suggest that Hitsugaya would hurt her!? Not to mention, last time she checked, Kira had nearly gotten himself killed the last time he faced the former tenth division captain. So what made him think he could possibly stand a chance against him?

“Hey, Hinamori, how about we grab lunch on the roof, okay?” Matsumoto chimed in with the hopes of diffusing the situation before it got any worse. “I know we aren’t supposed to go up there, but I’m sure we can find a way!”

Not trusting herself yet to speak, Hinamori could only nod in response before being dragged out of the classroom by voluptuous lieutenant. The 10th division officer seemed quite eager to get out of there before either of the 3rd division officers had a chance to object.

Once on the rooftop, the strawberry blond let go of her friend’s arm and commenced to walk towards the railing. Taking in the view of the sky above her, she let out a sigh.

“I can’t believe Kira…” she spoke with a shrug. “You’d think that with all those brains of his he would have an ounce of common sense, but I that’s just too much to hope for.”

“...What do you mean, Rangiku-san?” Hinamori asked as she joined her friend, choosing her words carefully along the way.

“I mean exactly what I said” Matsumoto replied. “Like taichou would ever hurt you of all people! God, ever since this whole thing happened, it’s like everyone has forgotten everything they ever knew about him… I mean, sure, he could have faked some of it, but I doubt he faked everything… Taichou is still the same person he always was. He’s just… Well…. Sigh, I don’t know...”

“So… You still believe in him, then?” Hinamori timidly questioned, shocked to hear that someone besides herself didn’t think that her childhood friend was a total monster.

“...I want to” the 10 division lieutenant replied with another sigh. “I want to believe that all those years together weren’t just lies, you know? You spend so much time with a person… It’s hard to believe that they’re suddenly not who they said they were…. That they never were who they said they were… I don’t know what’s going through his head right now, or even why he’s doing all this, but… There must be a reason. There’s no way taichou would do all this… Put us through all this… if there wasn’t a good reason for it. There’s just no way.”

Hinamori felt a single tear start to make its way down her cheek. Hearing someone else say the words she desperately wanted to hear washed over her as a tidal wave of relief. If someone else, someone who really knew him, also couldn’t think of him as a traitor, then maybe there was still some hope left…

Some hope that maybe, just maybe, her childhood friend would come back to her.

“Oh, Hinamori…” Matsumoto whispered as she rubbed the crying girl’s back in support. “It’s hard, isn’t it? Hearing people talk about him like that? They just don’t know him like we do… or, at least, how we thought we knew him.”

“R-Rangiku-san…” Hinamori muttered as she let out all the emotions she had bottle up in the last two days. “He wouldn’t just leave, right? Leave me… leave us… without a reason, right? There has to be a reason!... There just has to be…”

“There’s no way he would ever leave you, Hinamori. You should know that by now” Matsumoto said with a comforting smile. “I mean, if it was just me he left behind, then maybe… but… For him to leave you… Well, there’s no way he would do that willingly, that’s for sure. Hell, if the rest of the Seireitei thought he didn’t care about you, then they wouldn’t have us under constant surveillance, now, would they?”

“...Us? What do you mean us?” the fifth division lieutenant asked in confusion.

“Wait, you didn’t seriously think you’re the only one they’re keeping an eye on, did you?” Matsumoto replied. “Sure, you’re his closest friend and all, but I was his second in command. They’d be total idiots not to be suspicious of me. So by having the two of us along on this mission, they’re killing two birds with one stone.”

“So I guess that just makes us a couple of caged birds… huh?” Hinamori joked with a weak smile, her tears long since dried up.

“Looks like we’ll just have to flock together, Hinamori” Matsumoto answered with a laugh.

By the end of the day, Hinamori was exhausted and could have collapsed on the spot. She forgot how tiring it was to be in classes all day, especially when she was desperately trying to understand what was going on. Sure, it wasn’t as though she needed to pass the classes for her mission, but she had always been one who enjoyed learning new things regardless of how trivial they might be. And she also gladly welcomed the distraction the lessons provided her from the current situation.

It had been decided earlier that day that she, Matsumoto, and Ichimaru would be staying over at Inoue Orihime’s house during the course of their stay in the world of the living. Abarai and Kira were to stay over at Urahara’s and Kuchiki was to stay over at Kurosaki’s, despite the substitute Shinigami’s many protests. Although Kira had initially objected to the idea of them separating at night, which he argued to be the ideal time for Hitsugaya to make an appearance, Ichimaru was quick to silence him on the matter. And for the first time that day, Hinamori was grateful to the third division captain. As much as Hinamori liked Kira, she couldn’t handle another second of him constantly bearing over her like some sort of guard dog.

When she reached the Inoue residence along with the others, Hinamori was glad that the day was finally over and she could be alone with her thoughts. So when the opportunity presented itself, Hinamori was quick to exit out of her bedroom window to relax on the rooftop. She thought that as long as she didn’t go far, there wouldn’t be any harm. Besides, with the window still open, the people down below would be able to hear anything if she was loud enough. So Hinamori figured she’d be safe.

Having heard earlier that day that Matsumoto harbored the same doubts that she did was a huge weight off her shoulders. Even if she was no closer to uncovering the answer as she was the day before, just knowing that she had someone else she could confide in was enough. It was one more thing that she had that she didn’t have the day before. And maybe tomorrow, she would take another step forward in figuring out the secret behind her childhood friend’s sudden betrayal.

“Oh Hitsugaya-kun….” Hinamori muttered to herself as she stared at the starry sky above. “Just what are you doing?”

“I’m stood here talking to you, what else would I be doing?” a familiar voice suddenly spoke, shocking Hinamori to the core.

[bibliosexxual]

the valentine’s day showdown

Alternately titled: “A Mistake of Epic Proportions (With a Happy Ending)”

Sterek high school Valentine’s Day AU, a little over 4k words, rated T. :)   

So Stiles and Erica have this competitive flirting/wooing thing going. This totally-mutually-agreed-upon-to-be-platonic competitive flirting/wooing thing. Every Valentine’s Day Eve, Erica gets him good, and every Valentine’s Day, Stiles gets her back, thoroughly.

It started out pretty tame back in middle school, but with every passing year it's gotten gradually more explicit and cheesy as they try to out-embarrass each other. It's kind of like gay chicken, except hetero and strictly no-touching, and without any of the UST...

Okay, so maybe it's not that much like gay chicken, but it's definitely something. Something Stiles always relishes.

He's pretty sure he and Erica have a better time every Valentine's Day than a lot of the actual couples at their school.

It probably only works as well as it does because he and Erica have known each other since they were little kids, so they've grown up pranking and teasing each other at every opportunity and seeing each other in a bunch of decidedly unsexy moments. Like that time they were kicking around a soccer ball in Erica’s backyard and Stiles face-planted in the mud and chipped a tooth. Or that memorable afternoon when Erica's pyromaniac phase after watching Avatar: The Last Airbender culminated in her accidentally setting her hair on fire. (She had to get a buzz cut shorter than Stiles'.)

It also works out pretty well because at this point they really have no boundaries and no shame.

Oh, and because Erica is very, very gay.

(Stiles, meanwhile, is bi. However, he's never even for a moment thought of Erica romantically, which is fortunate because he's pretty sure that would be extremely awkward, not to mention unreciprocated.)

They got the idea for the competition around the hundredth time someone around town asked them, in all seriousness, if they were dating and when the wedding was going to be. (They were thirteen years old. Thirteen. Stiles wasn't thinking about romance at all at thirteen. He was thinking about Star Wars, and curly fries, and whether his and Scott's latest unintentionally disastrous science experiment was going to get them grounded and, if so, how to get out of it.)

He and Erica still get asked if they're dating on a regular basis, by the way, even though Erica has been very publicly out ever since she kissed Heather on the playground back in elementary school.

In short, the temptation to play off people's heteronormative assumptions is overwhelming.

This year, Stiles opens his locker the morning of February 13th with absolute wariness. It's a good instinct to have, because when he does, a cloud of pink and red glitter explodes outward all over him as a singing card buried deep within his locker starts belting out "Careless Whisper" by George Michael. All down the hallway, everyone bursts into mingled laughing and clapping and cheering.

Covered head-to-sneakers in glitter and probably being recorded by several phones, Stiles turns to face his audience and grandly takes a bow.

Mentally, he promises Erica that he's going to get her back so hard for this tomorrow.

That's not the end of it, though. Of course not.

He opens his pencil case in Econ and a generous handful of XXL condoms spills out all over his desk. There's a chorus of whoops and wolf-whistles from around the room, and Stiles is never, ever going to be able to look any of these people in the eye again.

He goes out to his Jeep that afternoon to find it practically buried under red streamers and balloons and heart-shaped graffiti in pink paint. It's completely garish, and if Stiles were actually dating someone who pulled something like this, he'd probably be scrambling for a restraining order.

Stiles loves it.

After Stiles cleans off the windshield (gathering a bit of an audience of curious students in the process), he heads straight to the Hallmark aisle of the drugstore, where he spends close to half an hour reading every single Valentine's card in stock. Let it never be said that Stiles is not thorough.

The one he settles on is museum-worthy levels of terrible, in Stiles' opinion.

"You've been on my mind a lot lately," the outside reads, innocent enough. The inside finishes, "And you wouldn't believe what you've been doing up there. ;)"

Stiles buys it on the spot.

Back at his house, he puts on some Stevie Wonder and smooth jazz for inspiration and gets down to work, filling in practically every blank space in the card with flower doodles and cartoon hearts and the kind of lurid, overflowing love letter that would make poets weep.

(In horror, that is.)

He makes sure to mention the XXL condoms, too.

On the back, just under the card-maker's logo, he leaves a generous square of blank space, then goes back and fills it in with the pièce de résistance: huge bubble letters in pink highlighter that spell out: "PROM?"

At the bottom, he signs it in shaky cursive with, "Lots of <3 from your not-so-secret admirer, Stiles."

Then he texts Scott, Kira, Boyd, and Isaac: dudes, I will literally pay you if you serenade Erica tomorrow at lunch for me. I'll bring the boombox.

He specifies “at lunch” because he figures that's when there'll be the biggest audience. Public humiliation, or at least public lighthearted embarrassment, is after all a cornerstone of this tradition.

Extra money if you dress up as cupids, he adds on impulse. Extra EXTRA money if your costumes are so ugly/cheesy that people can barely stand to look at you with a straight face.

There's a bit of haggling, but it turns out all of them except Boyd can be bought. (Boyd was a long shot anyway, but he had to try. That would have been comedy gold.)

As for the song, Stiles picks Marvin Gaye's "Let's Get It On."

What can he say, he likes the classics.

Okay, so he was sorely tempted to choose Boyz 2 Men's "I'll Make Love to You," which in his opinion is one of the most cringeworthy love songs ever recorded in the history of time and therefore perfect for this, but he didn't want to run the risk of any teachers cutting his singing troupe off mid-serenade for inappropriate lyrics. Erica isn't going to get out of this that easily.

So Marvin Gaye it is.

No rehearsal necessary, he makes sure to specify. The more off-key the better!

You're so weird, Isaac texts back.

Stiles elects to take it as a compliment.

*

Valentine's Day dawns bright and full of promise. Stiles gets to school a whole thirty minutes early (it's a personal best), hands off the boombox to an amused Kira, and then heads straight for Erica's locker.

The thing is, Stiles knows in general where Erica's locker is: down the hall from Mr. Harris' classroom on the second floor. But he always relies on the "Save the Wolves" magnet on the locker to the left of Erica's to guide him to the exact spot, and today that magnet is gone. Probably stolen. Or maybe Erica temporarily stole it to throw him off his game? If so, it's definitely working. Erica's locker is lost in a sea of bland sameness. He knows it's somewhere towards the middle of the row, but... Crap.

Stiles closes his eyes. Think.

The number was definitely in the late teens; Stiles would bet his Jeep on it. He thinks a little more. He's getting an 8 kind of vibe from his subconscious. Boom. 118. Yeah. 118 it is. Totally. Crisis averted.

He shoves the card through the vent in the locker and heads off to his first period class, whistling.

*

Stiles waits and waits through one class after another for Erica to text him about the card. There's nothing. Either she hasn't been by her locker yet or she's been rendered speechless by the card's sheer perfection. That would be a historic moment. Usually Stiles hears about it at length the instant a prank goes off. Stiles is getting kind of antsy, to be honest.

Stiles means to tease her about it in Chem, which they have together right before lunch (and, his brain adds gleefully, right before the serenade). Before he's even fully sat down, though, and definitely before he's had time to say anything, she's smirking at him and saying, "What, did my public displays of affection yesterday leave you speechless? I thought for sure you'd retaliate."

"Uh, but I did." That's about when the foreboding really kicks in. "Haven't you been by your locker today?"

"Yeah, several times. Nothing amiss," Erica says, with apparent total sincerity. “I was kind of disappointed in you, to be honest.”

"But..."

There's a panicked moment of silence just as Harris is starting class, and then Stiles hisses, "What is your locker number?"

Erica says, "117," and Stiles feels all the blood in his body turn to ice in an instant. Oh god.

"Who the fuck has 118, then?"

Instead of answering, Erica doubles up laughing so obnoxiously that Harris kicks her out of class.

Not good.

***

“I swear people get ten times more predatory than usual on Valentine’s Day,” Derek mutters to Cora as they near a group of freshmen girls in the hallway.

A hush falls over the group, and every single head turns in their direction. Most of them seem to be watching Derek, but he suspects a few of them are eyeing Cora, too. They’re like piranhas, Derek thinks uncharitably.

“Tell me about it,” Cora agrees. She shoots a withering glare at the freshmen, and they hastily scatter and regroup and move away as a pack down the hallway. “It makes me just want to punch something, you know?”

Cora is the only person Derek knows who hates Valentine’s Day as much as Derek does. (She subtly protests it every year by wearing her PIZZA IS MY VALENTINE t-shirt.) But they hate it for admittedly very different reasons.

Derek hates it primarily because it stirs up all his usually-repressed hopeless romantic feelings. Especially his hopeless romantic feelings about Stiles. That’s inevitably a bad idea.

Every single year, Derek gets assigned the locker next to Erica Reyes’. That means that practically every day of Derek’s high school life, he’s had to endure watching his crush hang around in Derek’s general vicinity while completely failing to notice Derek’s existence. It stings. Derek gets asked out all the time, so he knows it’s not like there’s something inherently uninteresting or unappealing about him, but it doesn’t do any good when the one person he wants to be asked by just... doesn’t care.

Derek has mostly accepted that Stiles isn’t into him, or at least he’s trying very hard to accept it, but every Valentine’s Day he can’t help the little flutter of hope that follows him around all day until it’s inevitably crushed for another year. Fuck any holiday that makes him feel like that.

Cora, on the other hand, does not have a Stiles of her own, at least not that Derek knows of. She hates Valentine’s Day for the simple reason that she’s exasperated by everything to do with romance. She can’t even watch people kissing in movies without rolling her eyes and making barfing noises.

(Her favorite holiday is Halloween because it’s “the least touchy-feely” and it centers around scaring the bejeezus out of the neighborhood kids.)

They stop off at Derek’s locker, and Derek sighs because someone has stolen his magnet again. The people at this school have no boundaries.

Speaking of no boundaries... There's an unmarked red envelope sitting atop his pile of textbooks when he finally jimmies his locker open. Did someone break into his locker? Do people not understand the concept of locks existing on lockers to keep people out?

“Ooh,” Cora says, filled with apparent schadenfreude. “Looks like somebody got a valentine.”

“Shut up,” Derek grumbles, tearing it open. A shimmery cloud of pink and gold glitter falls out of the envelope and all over his hands. Great. He yanks the card out, ignoring Cora’s amused snort.

It’s a Hallmark card. Derek reads aloud incredulously, “You've been on my mind a lot lately, and you wouldn't believe what you've been doing up there… winky face.”

Behind him, Cora laughs so hard it sounds like she’s in danger of spraining something. “Oh my god,” she wheezes, “that’s so awful.”

Derek skims the rest of the card. It’s covered from top to bottom in tiny scrawl bordered by meticulously hand-drawn hearts and roses, and on the back the word “PROM?” stretches boldly across the page in an eyesore of vivid pink.

It’s signed… it’s signed from Stiles, holy shit.

“Stiles? Who is Stiles?” Cora asks, hooking her chin over his shoulder. “Is that a girl or a boy?”

“Boy. I thought maybe you would know him. He’s in your grade.”

“Nope. How do you know him?”

“I don’t,” Derek answers absently, because now he’s actually gone back and started reading what Stiles wrote, and “holy shit” doesn’t even come close.

It’s kind of rambling. There’s a lot about the unparalleled beauty of Derek’s eyes and his “stunning physique” and how many years Stiles has longed to kiss him, which is kind of mindblowing considering that Derek has never so much as seen Stiles glance at him before. There’s also a flattering little limerick about Derek’s intellect and good humor to balance out the physical stuff. Under the part where Stiles asks him to prom, the note ends with a detailed list of all the places they could make out around school and—Derek blushes—then there’s a “P.S.” mentioning that Stiles will “bring the XXL condoms” if Derek will “bring the love.”

“Ew,” Cora says. “Whose dick are those condoms supposed to be for, anyway? Yours or his? No, wait, I don’t want to know. Please tell me he’s just making some kind of joke.”

“Probably,” Derek says. He finally manages to tear his eyes away and shut the card. “I mean, it’s probably some kind of pop culture reference. Stiles is always making pop culture references.”

“I thought you said you didn’t know him?”

Derek winces. “I, uh,” he fumbles. “I don’t? But I see him around a lot. I overhear him talking to Erica.” He opens the card again, just to confirm to himself that this really exists. It’s almost too over-the-top to believe.

Maybe that’s because it’s both a valentine and a prom invitation? Derek knows prom invites can be pretty elaborate sometimes. Still… “Do you think this is a prank? I mean, who writes this kind of stuff to someone they’ve never even talked to?”

Cora looks doubtful. “Why bother pranking someone you don’t even know? Half the fun is seeing your friend’s reaction to being pranked.”

That sounds reasonable enough. There’s no reason for Stiles to target him specifically for this kind of prank, if it is a prank. Unless, that is, he’s somehow found out about Derek’s crush. But Derek can’t see how he would. Derek’s been careful. He hasn’t told anybody about it or written anything down. He’s just pondered it in private. Extensively.

“Besides,” Cora goes on, “if it is a prank, then it’s a little mean, don’t you think?”

“Yeah.” If it is a prank, Derek is probably going to spend all weekend in bed, morosely eating peanut butter cups and rewatching the entire Star Wars series, even the prequels, from within a blanket burrito.

If it’s not a prank, though…

As a declaration, it’s definitely more than a little weird, but he’ll take it. Fuck, some of the things Stiles says about him, and says to him, in this letter… It’s so outrageous it almost comes back around to charming. It’s like Stiles is flirting with him through the words.

The more Derek thinks about it, the more sense it makes. As far as Derek has seen, Stiles is playful and never does anything by half measures. This note just represents the kind of person Stiles is—attentive to detail, funny, sweet, unique, creative, the kind of guy who goes all out for someone he likes…

Maybe someone else would be turned off by a card like this, but it just makes Derek like him that much more. Most people, in Derek’s experience, would never have the guts to do something like this to ask Derek out. They’d never take the risk. They’d never try to make Derek blush or laugh like this.

The bell for first period rings, interrupting his thoughts. Cora shoulders her bag and says, “Gotta go, but tell me how this works out. I’m intrigued now.”

“Okay,” Derek says, and focuses on carefully stowing away Stiles’ card in his homework folder so it won’t get bent before he heads off to Spanish class.

***

So Locker 118 is Derek.

And not Derek Greenberg, either. That might’ve been survivable. Derek Greenberg is the lacrosse team waterboy as well as one of the stupidest and most irritating, but also least threatening, people Stiles has ever met. Stiles could probably just stride up to him, snatch the card right out of his slack, sweaty grip, and walk off with his head still attached to his body, no sweat.

But nooo, it had to go and be Derek Hale’s locker.

Derek Hale as in, one of the gorgeous yet aloof Hale siblings who all give off practically identical back-off-or-I’ll-eat-you vibes.

In the past, Stiles has adopted an avoidance strategy with the Hales, and it’s worked out pretty well for him; his high school experience so far has been happily free of any maiming or marring or good old-fashioned terror. That’s all going to end today. The worst part is that Stiles has no one but himself to blame.

Stiles can’t even fully appreciate the gloriousness of Erica’s serenade at lunch, or the fact that the cafeteria ladies have scattered handfuls of Valentine’s candy over the lunchroom tables in an attempt to be festive. He’s too busy scouring his brain for every shred of knowledge he has about the Hales and about Derek in particular.

It’s not much.

He knows Derek is on the lacrosse team, and by lacrosse standards (which Stiles knows very little about), he’s really good.

He’s pretty sure Derek is a senior.

He knows Derek is a whole other level of attractive and owns a lot of leather jackets.

He’s seen him and his sisters driving around in a black Camaro that looks like it would be a better fit in an action hero movie than in a high school parking lot.

And according to Erica, Derek has a bit of a reputation for turning down every girl who asks him out, but that doesn’t stop them from trying. In fact, in a bizarre twist of logic, it seems to encourage them to keep trying.

That’s about where Stiles’ knowledge runs out. He doesn’t know, for example, if Derek is into guys. That suddenly seems like a very important thing to find out. Giving a horrendous romantic declaration—a horrendous, signed romantic declaration—to one of the scariest-looking people at Beacon Hills High is bad enough; Stiles is willing to bet it’ll be even worse if it turns out he’s given it to a straight guy.

*

Stiles doesn't manage to catch up to Derek. Instead, Derek catches up to him.

It happens like this: Stiles is headed to his Jeep after a truly harrowing day of quietly freaking out when Derek suddenly appears in front of him from between two cars and corners him against his Jeep. It's pretty terrifying.

"Derek!" Stiles squeaks, flailing and whacking his hand on the side mirror of his Jeep. It's not his most dignified moment.

Derek takes a step closer, looming right up into Stiles' space, and softly (dangerously softly, Stiles thinks) says, "Hey, Stiles. I got your card. Happy Valentine's Day to you, too."

Stiles whimpers.

He'd kind of been hoping that if he didn't manage to get the card back from Derek, then Derek at least wouldn't know who "Stiles" was and wouldn't be curious enough to find out. A lot of people don't know who Stiles is. It's great. But of course Stiles isn't that lucky.

Derek is actually smiling now, which is a facial expression Stiles didn't know Derek was even capable of. It's admittedly a small smile, but it's there. He smiles at Stiles and says, "My answer is yes."

"Your answer... to..."

"Prom?" Derek prompts, raising an expectant eyebrow. "My answer is yes. I'll go with you." He ducks his head, then glances up at Stiles through his eyelashes almost shyly, which is the weirdest thing yet. "You know, I thought your card was really bold and creative..."

As Derek talks, Stiles tries to subtly glance around to see if he's being punk'd, but he can't see any cameras or even any onlookers anywhere. There's just the occasional student hurrying past while shooting them a confused look—probably wondering why Derek Hale, Lacrosse God and Gorgeous Human Being, is talking to some nerd nobody.

As far as Stiles can tell, Derek is serious.

Which doesn't explain anything, really. Why the hell would Derek say yes? That's, like, social suicide.

"Okay, look," Stiles interrupts, "I think you might've gotten the wrong idea here. I wasn't actually, you know, um..."

He expects Derek to look relieved, maybe. Instead, Derek's face goes startlingly blank, and his whole body visibly tenses up. He suddenly looks a lot more like the familiar, menacing version of Derek that Stiles sees in the hallways, complete with the signature Derek Hale Death Glare(TM). Crap.

"It was a prank, then," Derek says flatly.

"Yes!" Stiles says, glad Derek gets it. "It was a prank. But not for you. For my friend Erica. I made a slight mistake. She has the locker next to yours? Blonde hair, brown eyes, wears a lot of corsets and lipstick—"

"I know who Erica is," Derek snaps.

"Oh. Okay. Cool. Very cool."

Derek turns away, scowling. "I should've known it was too good to be true," he mutters, so low Stiles barely catches it, and oh. Wait. What?

"You wanted it to be from me to you?" Stiles blurts, incredulous. "You wanted me to say all that creepy stuff and ask you to prom? Seriously?"

Derek doesn't say anything, but his jaw clenches and his Death Glare(TM), which is currently aimed at the asphalt by Stiles' feet, intensifies.

"But—but why?"

Derek rolls his eyes with his entire head. It's pretty impressively sassy. "Why do you think?"

"Wait." Stiles holds up a hand, trying extremely hard not to burst into shocked, inappropriate laughter. He feels like that wouldn't go over too well. "You're saying you—you, Derek Hale—have a crush on me."

Derek hunches his shoulders. "Why are you acting like that's so funny?"

"How about, because people like you don't get crushes on people like me."

"Says who?"

"Uh, the laws of the universe? The laws of society? The laws of the high school pecking order? Take your pick."

"That's stupid."

"Did you even know my name before today?"

"Yes," Derek says.

"Oh."

Derek looks uncertain, and maybe a little hurt. "Did you... did you not know my name?"

That's the moment it really sinks in. Derek likes him. Derek has feelings for him. Derek Hale like-likes Stiles Stilinski and wants to take him to prom. And, against all odds, it actually matters to Derek whether Stiles of all people knew who he was.

Wow.

This has never happened to Stiles before.

"Of course I knew who you were," Stiles says, and Derek's shoulders relax minutely.

"Oh," he says. "Okay."

They just look at each other for a minute then. It's kind of awkward but also kind of... not, somehow. Stiles has never really looked at Derek up close before. He has beautiful hazel-green-blue eyes and beautiful cheekbones and beautiful everything, really, but he also has kind of cutely small stick-out ears and a cowlick and kind of adorably buckish front teeth, and he's blushing harder than Stiles has ever seen outside of cartoons. He's gripping the straps of his backpack so hard it looks painful, like it might be cutting off the circulation to his fingers. He looks nervous, and unsure, and out of nowhere Stiles gets hit with a wave of... something. Tentative affection, maybe. Derek suddenly doesn't seem so unapproachable.

"Do you want to go on a date with me?" Stiles blurts.

Derek eyes him warily. "I thought this was all just a prank for Erica?"

"Well, yeah, it was, but... Listen, I don't know you that well, but I'd like to try. I mean, I'm game if you are." And he's pretty sure Derek is.

"When would this date be?"

"Well," Stiles grins, "are you doing anything right now? It is Valentine's Day. Perfect time for a date. I know for a fact the diner has a special on strawberry milkshakes."

"That sounds good," Derek says cautiously. He relaxes his grip on the straps of his backpack. He smiles.

Something fluttery starts up in Stiles' stomach at the sight, and, well. That's new. "Okay, then. Let's go."

"One thing first," Derek says, stopping him with a hand on his chest. "I think we need to clarify a certain claim you made in your letter."

Oh no.

Derek grins evilly. "Do you really need to wear XXL-sized condoms?"

"Oh god."

"Because I'm going to be very disappointed if that part wasn't true, Stiles."

Stiles groans and hides his face in his hands. Derek is never going to let him live that down, Stiles can already tell.

*

The day after Valentine's Day, Derek's wolf magnet mysteriously reappears on his locker.

(end)