#I swear to goodness I haven’t been this hyped for a game in a long time

[roscolate]

I AM 💥 GOING 💥 INSANE 💥

I’M SO FREAKING HYPED FOR THIS GAME AND FALLING MORE IN LOVE WITH IT WITH EVERY NEW PROMO 🥹🥹🤩🤩

This game looks so cute AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[mayaflowerxs]

hi hun, if you dont mind can you make a fic of jaemin being all crazy for y/n but it starts off with them just sexting n dry humping till he goes all crazy for her. btw! i loved the affair series would love to see dream ver. :)

CRAZY IN LOVE

Synopsis: It was stupid really, you were bored and treated the app as a joke. You just never would have thought the man you began sexting would be your best friends boyfriend and at that an obsession beginning to develop.

Warning: Smut / Fluffish? / Angst . Swear word usage, Serious!Jaemin x Shy!Reader. Toxic relationship, pick me best friend, cheating,TW! mention of suicide, conflicted feelings. Reader is a bit of a push over + character development. Takes place in college. Blue: Jaemin, Pink:Reader

A/N: Hi love! Hope you enjoy and thank u sm! I haven’t considered making one for dream but maybe after I’m done I may think about it!

Pairing: Jaemin x fem reader

You felt like a shit person. You hate fake people, players even and yet here you are doing the very thing you despise. Being bored isn’t a good enough justification for it, your interest was peaked the second you scrolled by the app in the App Store. A cold rainy day that left you alone, cold and in the dark of your dorm. Roommate was out doing god knows what, your best friend could never really be cooped up for long. The cold rain drops fell on your window that laid beside your bed. Tiktok wasn’t interesting, no movies on any movie platform seemed to catch your focus. Wednesday playing in the background for the sake of keeping the room completely dark and silent.

‘HEARTSTRING, the best most popular app for young adults ready for a relationship!’

What harm could it be if you tried out the app right? It’s not like anything bad could really come out of it.

“And so I was like, Beverly you have to stop shitting around and like fucking cut the chord. He’s not interested in you anymore. I mean yeah have we been having a bit of flirty banter here and there, sure but-“

The chitter chatter of his girlfriend talking his ear off began to muffle as Jaemin focuses his attention on his cell phone. He wasn’t exactly in the best mood, it’s fucking cold outside. His thick jacket he brought with now currently wrapped around his girlfriend because of the refusal she had to bring her own. Currently sitting inside a vegan restaurant and a $50 dish that isn’t all that appetizing and fulfilling. With an hour worth of talking of all the boring shit his girlfriend has to ramble about, he feels it’s the least bit understandable he’s decided to do something he wants to do. Be on his phone.

His social battery only down by its last percentage, a small frown on his face as he scrolls through his feed. Boring and bland, only a small story of Jeno’s in which him and the boys were currently playing the newest game. Months and months of hyping it up, waiting for its release and Jaemin is wasting his time on his 30th date. By now, his bank account is about ready to burst. A cry for help he swears he hears each time he picks up his wallet. Stopping midway scroll when an ad appears, ‘HEARTSTRING!’

Taking a quick glance up at his girlfriend and sees she’s still rambling on about girl drama as she continues to take pictures of her salad and posting them online. To say his relationship with Nayoung was perfect would be the furthest from the truth. If anything, he still doesn’t quite understand how he managed to get in the relationship in the first place. What was suppose to be a quick fling, resulted in Nayoung telling the entire school they were together. Her parents were quick in wanting to get to meet him, a very serious talk from her father had chills running up his arms. “Don’t you even dare hurt my little girl. You don’t know what I’m capable of son.” He’s tried to think of ways to get out of that situation but it’s only gotten worse when Nayoung got in touch with his parents. The thrill look on their faces when they were told their oldest son was finally in a committed relationship. Jaemin felt that maybe he would always be stuck.

And if that was the case, he might as well still have fun if he can’t walk away from her.

Setting up your account came to be really easy. You plan to delete the app by the end of the night, you’re not looking for something seriously and so far the app itself doesn’t look that serious either. It seemed everything was anonymous for the most part. With only using real descriptions and names, not personal pictures are to be added and instead icons. An app for anonymous chatting. For a while it seemed it was a scam, nothing good was happening other than the constant liking of each profile that propped up for you. You weren’t looking for anything specific, you just wanted to have a conversation and just as you were about to log out and delete it. A notification popped up.

na.jaemin0813 is typing…

Hey

Hello…

Did you get the app out of boredom as well?

It’s like we’re one mind

Guess we were meant to be ;)

Haha cheeky

You know it babe

So tell me, what’s your favorite conspiracy theory you can discuss for hours

Ooh getting serious are we?

Chatting with Jaemin didn’t seem so bad. In fact, you’ve come to enjoy your conversation with him, you didn’t expect it to go on longer than anticipated.

“Y/n im home!” You hear your best friend say as she closes the door behind her. Turning off your phone before you can receive the next message Jaemin was about to send you, a figure appears by your door way. “I’m fucking exhausted.” She huffs as she drops the many bags of clothes. A pout on her face as she slumps her shoulders. “Can you make me food, i am in a serious need of a bath.” “I still have some of my left over chicken Alfredo in the fridge-“ “You know I don’t eat left overs.” She makes a disgusted look, “Please! I’ll owe you.” She smiles before wandering off to her room. “You already owe me.” You mumble before getting out of bed and into the kitchen. The running water is heard a few minutes later with the sound of music playing soon afterwards. As you let the water boil for the pasta, you get back on your phone.

Where have you gone darling?

Already missing me ?

Given you’re someone who isn’t all that dry, who wouldn’t be?

So am I safe to assume you haven’t had great chats recently?

You’re the only one who hasn’t made the entire conversation about themselves and the many inconveniences in their lives

Ugh, those people are the worst.

The loud obnoxious singing of your best friend is what interrupted your conversation with him. Focusing back on her dinner as she spent the next hour an a half in the bath.

A sigh escapes Jaemin as he waits for the three dots to appear before exiting out of the app and moving on. The loud yelling of the guys are heard as he enters his dormitory. Busying themselves on whatever video game they’ve bought lately, “On your right!” Haechan exasperates. Taking the seat next to him, Jaemin had kicked off his shoes and rested them on top of the coffee table. “Oh you’re back!” He hears Jisung’s voice as soon as he entered the small living room. “Were you in my room?“. Shrugging his shoulders, he lifts up the cup of ramen in his hand. “You stash them in your room, finally found them.” “Yeah it’s exactly why I stashed them.” He shakes his head, hearing a notification from his phone he lifts it up only to frown when he sees it was Nayoung.

“I’m guessing the date didn’t go well?” Jisung asks. “She’s so high maintenance.” He sighs before closing his eyes and rubs his temple. “Why don’t you break up with her?” Haechan asks him, half of his attention on the flat screen tv. “Because if I break up with her, her father will break my face I thought I told you already?” “Oh right- move you fuck!” Getting off the couch, Jaemin walks over to the kitchen table and takes a seat keeping the maknae company.

Lets go out tomorrow!

Shutting his phone off, Jaemin doesn’t bother responding back. Mentally and socially drained to respond. “I’ll be in my room.” He murmurs not bothering to get a response back. The door to his room gets closed behind him, falling on his bed as he feels himself about to drowse off until he hears another notification go off.

So do you study?

Third year in college :)

Really? Where?

Seoul National University.

No way really? I go there too!

We should get together sometime.

Already desperate to get to know me?

Yeah well, I’d like to be able to see the face I’m talking to instead of a screen.

Mm I don’t know…

Oh come on, are you gonna make me work for it?

Yep

Meanie :(

As the days went by the two of you have constantly texted the other. To the point people began to notice, “why are you always on your phone?” You best friend half heartedly asked one day, on her own as she busies scrolling through her feed. Eyes rolling when she sees one of her ‘friends’ post a picture. “Told her she looked ugly in that photo, can’t believe she still posted it. Eh, A+ for confidence i guess.”

Peeking over her screen she frowns when she notices you didn’t even bother answering her question. Instead, a smile on your face as you continue to text Jaemin. It’s been an entire week since you downloaded the app, an entire week since you began texting Jaemin and a week since you’ve been this lonely looking person. It made Nayoung wonder, you were never this preoccupied with your phone. If anything you never used it mainly because you didn’t have much going other than movies and tiktok. But this, no this can’t be a romcom or TikTok’s doing. “Oh my god!”

Jumping back startled, you look at her shocked face. “You’re seeing someone!” Scoffing, you shake your head and set your phone down. “Am not.” “So why did you set your phone facing down. Mphm?” “I always do that.” Stopping momentarily, Nayoung can’t tell if you were telling the truth. Unlike you, she isn’t that observant, she can’t even remember your birthday and only hopes she hasn’t missed it yet. “Don’t change the subject! Now tell me, who is it.” “No one-“ Poking you with her chopsticks, she leans closer. “Now, now it’s been AGES since your last relationship and we both know how that ended. Just want to see how this one’s like” A small pang was felt in your heart, you didn’t like to remember it. Your last boyfriend only used you to get closer to Nayoung. It hurt to know he didn’t even like you not once throughout your relationship. Broken up with him and getting the reassurance from your best friend is what got you through it.

“He’s not like that-“ “Aha! So you are seeing someone!” Sighing, you smile shyly at her. “Not really seeing if I have never met him. We only started texting each other. It’s only been a week.” You say with a small smile. A ding is heard and you were quick to check, a small chuckle escapes you and you’re entire focus was now back on your phone. You miss the small scowl your best friend has on her face. She wondered who this boy was, how is it that you didn’t tell her when all of this was happening? A bitterness began to bubble inside of her but she keeps it on the low and instead grabs the dishes and puts them in the sink.

“I’m going out, me and Jaemin got a date.” She says loud enough for you to hear her. “K have fun.” You say lowly, eyes still on your screen. Giving you one last glance, she makes her way out.

“Jaemin, are you even paying attention to me?” She huffs annoyedly at her boyfriend. “Of course I am.” He quickly typed out his last text before looking up at her. Rolling her eyes, she huffs and crosses her arms. “Is this how you’re gonna be when you visit my parents?” “Visit?” “Of course, mom has been wanting you to come visit and so I promised her the next time I fly out I’d take you with me! My friend will be coming too of course, poor thing can’t see her parents. It’s this whole drama thing she’s got going on.” She shrugs. Great another weekend ruined.

“Alright see you then.” A grin forms on her face, leaning in for a kiss before she was long gone to do shopping with her friends. Rolling his eyes, Jaemin sits back on his bed and unlocks his phone. His finger hovered over the contact. He wondered what you were up to, he was bored and a little moody that you haven’t texted him yet. Scrolling through your last few messages that he’s noticed have gotten more flirtier over the course of time.

Whatcha doin?

Why, you miss me? :(

Don’t be a brat.

You love it

And you love teasing me smh

Still mad…?

You sent a pic of your boobs while I was in the middle of class

I had blue balls for the rest of the hour

So you don’t want more?

I want you.

Aw what a cutie

I’m not cute I’m hot

Would you like to see?

Photo Sent

The text messages progressively got more flirty, from pictures of abs and cleavages. You made sure your face was no where in view of the camera. You don’t know where this confidence came from. You never sent such pictures before, and yet never would you have thought to begin sexting a stranger you met online.

Fuck y/n, I need to see you.

I’m sure your hand can keep you company

Fucking meanie

;)

“Y/n! I need help packing I just bought new clothes and I need your help making an outfit out of them!” You hear Nayoung enthusiastically shout as she enters the dorm. Slamming the door behind you, opening the camera app you take one last pictures of your chest down, wearing a black corset with a push-up bra you notice Jaemin swoons over. Sending it before shutting your phone off.

A huff is heard as you watch Nayoung drop down all her bags filled with clothes. “Okay tomorrow morning we should be heading down to my fathers cabin alright?” Nodding, she leads you to her room. Two large suitcases are taken out of her closet as she begins taking down all her clothes from the hangers. Looking at herself through the body mirror as she makes distasteful noises each time she comes across an article of clothing she no longer likes.

Do you like torturing me?

Are you fisting yourself rn?

Kinda have no other choice…

Good, go faster for me will ya?

It’ll send you another picture of me. Maybe something more revealing…

“Y/n? You listening?” “Yeah!” Looking from her bed, a large pile of clothes as she poses in the mirror. She peeked through her mirror to see how engrossed you were with your phone. A small frown as she still doesn’t know much about this guy you’ve met. “Beige or cream?” Showing you a scarf she plans to wear, she pretend to think. “Cream, doesn’t wear out your face.” Smiling, she turns around and continues to check herself out. “So who exactly will be going?” Hearing the sound of another text coming from Jaemin, you take a peek to see he had sent a picture of his own.

“Oh just my parents, some childhood friends and my boyfriend. “ “Speaking of boyfriend, will I be meeting this boy you’ve been messaging?” She wiggles her brows. “Nope, I still haven’t met him yet.” You chuckle. “Huh..” she breathes out before posing in front of the mirror. “So how are things with your boyfriend?” you ask. “Things are great! I’m so happy to be with him, he’s so sweet look he even got me this necklace.” Showing you the Diamond necklace you nod, you didn’t know much about this guy. If anything you never met him. It’s ironic how much she’s mentioned him and yet has never said his name. You don’t know how old he is, how he looks. Just that he goes to the same college as the two of you. Nayoung has even tried her best to keep him from entering your dorm. For whatever reason it is, she doesn’t want him coming over. A bit secretive with him really.

“Okay are you packed?” Nodding she smiles. “God you’re so lucky, you don’t have a lot of clothes to choose.” She sighs “ Well, I better get to finishing you don’t have to help me anymore thanks.” Grabbing your phone you close the door to your room behind you and lock it. A gasp escapes you, eyes widening at the nude he sent.

You don’t beat around the bush do ya?

Gotta show you how much you’re affecting me

Cute

My dick is cute?

Your dick looks delicious actually

Then how about you come over n suck it

Yeah but I love torturing you so keep fucking your hand for now.

Damn woman

Jaemin shut off his phone after he seen you left him on read. He was frustrated. Sexually frustrated, it’s humiliating knowing how affected he is by you. He doesn’t care he’s currently humping his pillow pretending it’s you. Chest heaving, a sweaty forehead as he chases after his release. Never has he had to work for someone this much. He would’ve given up and moved on but how could he, something about you entices him. Makes his want more, to go after you no matter the cost. He loves your banter, he loves how much you tease it keeps him on his toes. His hand going faster and faster until finally he felt the warm white liquid fall on his fingers. In the corner of his dark room, he catches his breath. Receiving another message but only groaning when he sees it’s Nayoung.

Can’t wait for tomorrow!

To say you weren’t cranky would be a lie. You knew you’d be getting up early you just underestimated how early. Nayoung isn’t a morning person and to think she would be demanding you to get up at 3 in the morning was the last thing on your mind of possibilities. Sitting in the back of the car as Nayoung claimed she would be picking up her boyfriend on the way. You didn’t mind, if anything you’d be taking the time to catch up on some needed sleep. A large blanket over you, you don’t hear the door to the passenger seat open and close. A smack of lips kissing and a cheerful voice greeting him.

“Is this your friend?” Nodding, she looks back to see you asleep. “Yep, she went back to sleep. She spent all night texting some guy. Kinda starting to think he doesn’t exist.” Raising a brow at her as she whispered the last part. “Whys that?” Shrugging her shoulders, eyes on the road. “She hasn’t mentioned his name, refuses to let me meet him and anytime I ask about him she tries to change the subject.” Jaemin only hums before looking out the window, dark eye bags beginning to become apparent as he too wasn’t exactly in the best mood. His hair was still a bit disheveled and he was only running on two hours of sleep. Guess his girlfriends friend wasn’t the only one up all night texting.

By the time the three of you arrived, you woke up abruptly by the slamming of a door. “Come on y/n we’re here!” You hear Nayoung shout from outside. Stretching and getting out, you’re left with carrying in the rest of the stuff. The cabin was large, only visited a handful of times. Loud voices are heard from the kitchen as Nayoung busies herself greeting the family. Huffing when you drop Nayoung’s heavy luggage inside you bump into someone on accident. “I’m sorry!” Tall and standing before you, Jaemin props his glasses up. Dropping down his bags and sending you a forced smile. “It’s alright.”

“Oh y/n! This is my boyfriend Jaemin!” The two of you freeze. Watching as she walks over to hook her arm around his. A grin on her face as she cuddles close to him. It couldn’t be right? Looking over and seeing he as well seemed tense but he kept a calm face. “H-Hello.” Giggling, she shakes her head. “Always so shy. Jaemin?” Nudging him, he seems to snap out of it. Clearing his throat before doing a quick half assed bow. “Hey.” Looking between the two of you, she makes a face. “Well that wasn’t awkward, anyways. Mom and dad wants to see you so shall we get going? Oh and y/n sorry we didn’t have enough rooms you don’t mind crashing on the couch right?” Shaking your head she smiles. “Great! You can leave your things in my room, you know where they are right?”

Not waiting for a response she drags him into the kitchen where it erupts in greetings. Laughs and giggles are heard, taking a small peek you see her friends are also in there as well. Gawking at him as he respectfully greets them. Sighing, you grab your things and go up the stairs. “Hey y/n do you mind carrying the rest of our luggages? Please, thank you!” Nayoung shouts as you were half way up the stairs.

You felt left out you weren’t going to lie. But then again, when haven’t you. Nayoung has always made it easy to fit in, to make conversation even though most of the time the topic always shifted over to her but overall, it was easy for her to get involved. Not you, it took a while for you to barely start lowering your walls. Just the idea of forcing yourself out of your shell sends shivers. How can you? You get the feeling Nayoung’s childhood friends don’t really like you as they always stare and mutter things under their breaths. And like all the other times you visited, you spent your time on the couch petting the family cat. “I’m so happy he likes you. He hates people, if anything he still isn’t quite fond of Nayoung.” Her mother giggles as she takes the other couch. Staring lovingly at the two of you. A warm smile forms on your face as you continue to pet the cat sitting on your lap. Her husband walking over to sit next to her, a mug in his hand as he nods.

“Toby hates Nayoung for some reason. Even before she went off to college he’d always hide from her.” By then everyone has shifted themselves into the living room. The group surrounding Nayoung, the smile slowly drops when she sees her parents conversing with you. “You must be a gem if Toby trusts you that much.” Her mother claps her hands. Jaemin takes a seat across from you, fighting back the look of boredom on his face. He can’t help but analyze you. Can it be the same y/n he’s been texting? Since he’s arrived, he hasn’t had the balls to text her. There’s no way the chick he’s been sexting is his girlfriends best friend. If that’s the case, he’s screwed.

A scoff is heard from beside him, looking up and see Nayoung enter the living room. “He’s just a dumb cat. I’m sure he’s only using you as a cushion.” “Well if that’s the case, I’m honored.” You smile down at the cat who purrs. Jaemin notices the scowl on his girlfriends face. He wonders why, it’s not like she particularly likes Toby. Every time he’s come over she’s always going on and on about how the cat terrorizes everything. “You should be, and Jaemin too! Toby loves him!” Looking up and meeting eyes with Jaemin you gulp before looking down. A silence is met before Nayoung speaks up. “Well it’s still pretty early and I’m tired. Jaemin lets go to bed.” One by one, everyone walks off to their bedrooms which leaves you on the couch with the grey and white cat. Head butting your hand, a few hours go by and you haven’t gotten the heart to move him. The sleep drowsiness has disappeared and you made due on being on your phone for the time being. A notification is sent from your phone, Jaemin.

It’s you isn’t it?

I don’t know what you’re talking about..

“Yes you do.” Jumping up, you see him standing at the bottom of the stairs. “Holy shit you scared me.” By the sudden jolt, Toby has taken it upon himself to get off your lap and plop down on his cat tree. Walking closer to you, you shift uncomfortably. You don’t know what to do, what can you do to make things better?

Silently getting closer, you open your mouth to explain yourself but he cuts you off. Instead he takes a seat besides you and smashes his lips on top of yours. A moan emits from you, it was quick and needy and you liked it. You liked it so much you even climbed on top of him. His arms coming around your waist to pull you closer. He smelled nice, his cologne hitting your nostrils and lips were soft and plump. Cupping his face to keep his lips on top of yours. A smile forming on his face before pulling away, “So you were the one teasing me huh?” A blush began to form on your face before awkwardly laughing. “So you’re my best friends boyfriend huh.” Clearing his throat he looks down uncomfortably. “Listen, I’m not the type to cheat okay? It’s just that I kinda had no choice but to be in a relationship with her and-“

“She trapped you yeah I know, she has done that with all of her exes.” Raising a brow he looks up at you. “Really?” Nodding, you sigh. “She can’t keep a man for the life of her so she forces one on them by using her father to get them to agree. He’s rich and powerful, wouldn’t be surprised he’d have you kicked out of college or have you be fired from your job. Blacklisted for any future opportunities and more.” “If I’d known earlier I would’ve tried avoiding crossing paths. Why are you friends with her?”

“I don’t know, I guess she was the only one who stayed.” “Stayed? What happened if I may ask.” “I don’t know, one second I had tons of friends who could rely on me and the next, I was hated.” You look down sadly. Startled when he plants a kiss on your cheek, a grin on his face as his eyes adoringly stare at you. “I’m glad I finally met you.” “I’m glad too-“. Reciprocating his kiss, you begin to grind on top of him. A groan from him only has you doing it again and again. Pushing him down on the couch as his hands roam all over your body. Piece by piece, clothes are scattered on the floor and heavy breathing gets louder. Your head is thrown back when you feel yourself stretch around him. A large hand going to cover your mouth. Leaning in, his mouth attaching itself onto your nipple and sucking. Sensitive, you begin to bounce on his lap. Hands on his chest as he guides you to go faster. Trying to keep the slapping sounds at bay. The feeling of him deep in your snatch had your head spinning, it truly has been a while since you’ve had sex. It was wrong that the first person you sleep with is your best friends boyfriend but you just love it so much.

And it seems you’re not the only one. For the remainder of the weekend the two of you have gotten closer. Sneaky glances thrown and secret meet ups. When in the kitchen alone, he smacks your ass before leaving a kiss on your cheek. A shit eating grin on his face when he meets with the others. Content he’s finally getting you back for all the teasing you’ve done. “Are you alright y/n? Your face is super red?” Nayoung’s mother says. “Probably a bad reaction to one of her creams. I keep telling her she doesn’t have to keep putting on so many products. Going natural is just as pretty.” Nayoung sends you a smile. Speaking up for you, a strong grip on your fork, you don’t bother to explain yourself. “I’m okay.”

Jaemin certainly didn’t like it. And he certainly didn’t like how easily you let her comment slide. “I try to say the same thing to you as well Nayoung. No reason you need fifty bottles of foundation. A day or two without it wouldn’t hurt babe.” He sends her a smile before taking a bite from his food. Tensing, Nayoung is left without words. Embarrassed by the looks her friends sends her. A scowl on her face as she desperately tries to change the subject. “So! Should we hit the beach later on?” “Yes!” Her friends clap. “Okay good! After we’re done we’ll pick out our bikinis!”

Bikini’s? Nayoung never mentioned there would be swimming involved? You didn’t even pack any clothes to get wet in. The closest thing you had were shorts and even then they weren’t comfortable to get wet with.

“It’s a bummer you can’t get in.” Nayoung pouts at you, watching you set your towel on the sand. Sunglasses on as you send her a reassuring smile. “Eh it’s okay, I’ve gotten too much sun anyways-“. “Yeah you’re looking a little dark, how about you stay under my moms umbrella for the time being okay? Hope you don’t get too bored!” She says before scurrying off to her friends. Clenching your jaw, you try to not let her words affect you. Has she always been this snakey? Or is this you trying to justify your actions for hooking up with her boyfriend. Surely she must’ve always been this terrible to you from the beginning.

“Come on.” “Huh?” Looking over and seeing Jaemin has his hand extended you raise a brow. “Where?” “Less questions and more walking, come on.” Allowing him to drag you away, he takes you to a near by store. “Bikini’s?” “Get one, it’s on me.” “You don’t need to-“ “I want to, besides I need to get sunscreen.” He wonders off for it, and as he does so you look around the store. Eyes straying on a red two piece, you go to the fitting rooms and liking the look of it on you. Getting out, Jaemin freezes when he sees you. “How do I look?” Checking to see if anyones watching, he pushes you inside and closes the door behind him. Dropping the bottle of sun cream and picking you up. Leaning you up against the wall he desperately connects your lips with his. Running a hand through his hair, he begins to dry hump you. A moan comes out of you that he muffled with his mouth. A hand coming to wrap around your neck and lightly squeeze. “Fuck you’re so hot.” His pupils dilated as he leans in and press kisses to your chest.

Pulling the top down to reveal your perky tits. Sucking and fondling with them, looking to the side and seeing the mirror reflecting the lewd actions he’s doing. “We should get going, don’t want to raise suspicion.” You tell him with heavy breathing. Reluctantly detaching himself from you and setting you down. “Don’t change.” Grabbing your clothes and lotion, the two of you walk out and make your way to the counter. Ripping off the tag and handing it to the cashier as he pays for it. By the time the two of you make your way back, you hear shouting. “Babe where have you been?” Nayoung gets closer. “Needed sunscreen and got y/n a bathing suit.” Eyes turning to look at you, the plastic smile ready to falter. “Oh! How nice..well come on let’s get in the water feels nice!” She goes for his hand but he takes a step back.

“Yeah I will in a bit, you should join the others they seem pretty lost with out you.” Looking back and seeing her friends looking bored without her. “Oh okay. Glad you can join us after all y/n.” She sends you a smile before going back in. Feeling a tug, you look down and see Jaemin had taken his shirt off. “Help me put sunscreen on yeah?”

You can practically feel the daggers being thrown at you. But you ignored it, you liked making her jealous. A part of you felt proud you had the upper hand than Nayoung. Even more that it’s with her boyfriend. Turning around, you put some on his chest. Running your hands over his abs, his eyes looking directly into yours. “I really badly need to fuck you.” Rolling your eyes, you go to walk away but he stops you. “Now y/n.”

“Are you seeing this?” One of Nayoung’s friends says as they all watch Jaemin slowly put on sunscreen on you. Going up your leg and too close to your ass. “I knew it was a mistake to introduce them.” She scoffs. “Come on hun, do you really think he’ll do anything with her?” “It’s not him I’m worried, poor girl is so deprived I worry she’ll do anything for attention.” She pouts. “Don’t worry, Jaemin’s too smitten for you. He’d never be unfaithful to you.” Smiling she turns over to her friends. “Thanks guys, besides we’re really strong.” “So strong that should we assume he’ll pop the question anytime soon?”

Nodding they squeal. “I’m sure he already has the ring set out for me.” She claps her hands.

“Jaemin anyone can walk in on us any second!” You smack Jaemin’s bicep, currently in a dark small closet the cabin had he had managed to cramped you two inside. It was loud outside, music blasting as the others conversed with one another. Luggages were being packed and dinner was being cooked. In a few hours you were meant to be making your way back home and instead, have a clingy boy stuck to your side. A grin on his face as he leans in and kisses you. “Need you…” he pouts as he nuzzles his face in the crook of your neck. Hands beginning to roam down your side and to your back. Biting your lip when you feel him squeeze your ass, gasping when you feel his bulge after he pulled you closer to him.

“No one will hear us mhm?” He breathes in your ear as he peppers your neck. Massaging your cheeks as he has you pinned against the wall. You can’t ignore the arousal in your pants but it didn’t stop you from worrying of being potentially caught. “No sir.” Pushing him away, you reach for the door knob. Feeling him pull you inside again roughly when Nayoung’s faint voice was heard going up the stairs. “I have no idea where he went.” She tells her friends. “I bet he’s with y/n again. They have been way too close.” “I’m sure he feels bad, I mean she is the odd one out.” Nayoung reasons. “She’s a loner Nayoung, girls like her use that to reel men in.” Clenching your jaw, you don’t notice Jaemin wrapping his arms around your waist.

“Ignore them.” He whispers into your ear. Once you were sure they had left, you don’t utter a word and merely walk out. Leaving him in the closet by himself.

Nayoung always assumed she’d be the first to seal the deal between the two of you. The first to have a boyfriend, to be engaged and to start a family. Unlike her, you didn’t grow up with a lot so she always had more than you. The advantages like starting her own independent life. You had to start from scratch, lots of hours working for you to save. It’s what the world admired about you. It’s what they respected you for, many could relate to you. And even through all the hardships you still smiled. You stayed optimistic and it’s why you had so many friends, why so many guys wanted your number instead of Nayoung’s.

“I’m sorry I’m not interested.” “Actually I wanted to see if you can give me your friend, y/n’s number.”

For a while it seemed like Nayoung was the forgotten one. It was all about her friend Y/n. What you were up to, how you were doing. She just wanted to see what the fuss was about in having so many people care about you. So the cosmetics came in, then the surgeries, the hard diets. But when they weren’t enough, the lies came in.

“Oh sure, but I have to say she’s currently going through something. Chlamydia actually.”

She didn’t mean for the lies to keep progressing but she just wanted to take some of the attention off you and divert it over to her.

“She thinks you’re a freak.”

She did feel bad though when people eventually began to hate you. And before she knew it, she was the only friend you had left. Boys avoided you and girls despised you. Your last boyfriend only cheated on you because Nayoung lied to him saying you had cheated on him.

“I guess she thought you just weren’t good enough, I don’t know what to tell you. But, if I were her I would know I made a big mistake. You’re a catch.” Her hand lays on top of his, a reassuring and innocent smile plastered on her face before leaning in and kissing him.

For years now she was finally on the other end, the one who everyone praised and idolized. And a part of her liked how she can control you, it felt nice to be better for once. And seeing how close you and Jaemin have gotten definitely hasn’t been putting her at ease.

During dinner she made sure Jaemin sat next to her and away from you. Served him and kissed him at unconventional times. By the end of the night it seemed she was utterly in love with him, which is why she just had to rub it in just a little deeper into your face. “I’m going to tell him I love him.” Taking you by surprise, you suppress any distasteful emotion. “That’s great! I’m sure he’ll feel the same.” He won’t. You’re sure of that. “I want to live with him y/n.” Widening your eyes, “Live together? But what about dorms? It’s still mandatory to be in one and you can’t exactly room with a guy.”

“Only for a few more months.” Sighing and sitting back on the couch she smiles dreamily. “I’m telling you, he’s the man of my dreams.” You didn’t have much to say. Which only made you more guilty with how you’ve been treating her behind her back. It seemed she really did like him, after all she has been stuck by your side when everyone else turned against you. “Then tell him how you feel.”

“We can’t keep doing this.”

It’s been three months since the visit to Nayoung’s parents. Three months since you said you’d stop hooking up with him and finally today you’d be calling it off. “Like hell you are, what the hell y/n. Where is this coming from?” A duvet wrapped around your body, you sit up on the bed. Messy hair with smeared makeup as you don’t even dare meet eyes with Jaemin. With only briefs on, he gets out of bed. Disheveled hair, muscles more prominent and the red marks you left on him still apparent. Lip stains on his neck with dark love marks going down his collar bone. A frown on his face as he demands an explanation, even when he’s upset he’s still breathtakingly attractive. “It’s not right.” A sarcastic laugh falls out of his mouth as he searches for his clothes.

“You’re finally realizing that after months?” Looking at you for any other answers, he drops his shirt on the bed and climbs back on. Cradling your face, he looks at you worriedly. “Talk to me baby, what’s wrong?” Feeling the tears beginning to form, you shrug him off. You don’t trust your voice, there’s a ball beginning to form and you know if you dare speak a work you’ll only sob. About to get out of bed, he grabs you by the waist. “No, you’re not running way again. Talk to me-“ “Jaemin you’re in a relationship with Nayoung! She loves you and even wants to live with you and here we are having sex!”

“She’s not you!” Looking away, he huffs and wraps his arms around your torso. “I love you.” Taken by surprise, you turn to face him with wide eyes. “Come again?” “I’ve never said that to any of my exes, and it sucks that this is the situation that we are in but, im not lying. I love you, not Nayoung. It’s why I didn’t say it back when she said it to me.”

“Really?” Smiling, he nods and leans in for a kiss you grant him happily. “I still think it’s wrong. Maybe if we confess then she will let you go. Yeah it will permanently ruin our friendship but you at least deserve your freedom.” Shaking his head he sighs. “It’s her father i’m worried for.” Feeling dejected, you let him pull you into a cuddle. Back under the sheets as he peppers your face in kisses. Until there’s a loud slam on the door, eyes widening Jaemin lifts a finger to his mouth. Your door was locked thankfully.

“Let me check if she’s home…hey y/n! You home?!” Knocking on the door and trying to open it but to no avail. Shaking his head, he covers your mouth. “Guess she’s not home.” She says, she must’ve brought someone. Getting up to change, you can’t but overhear her speak.

“Can’t believe you’re still friends with her after everything she did.” Confused, you lean your ear up gassing the door. “Well I mean, she’s my best friend-“ “Yes but she cheated on her boyfriend.”

Cheated?

“She didn’t know what she was doing.”

Why the hell is Nayoung agreeing?

“Yeah well what about her bullying you?”

You looked back at Jaemin in shock as he as well seems surprised.

“That was years ago, she’s getting better.”

You didn’t understand why Nayoung was agreeing with such false claims. You have never cheated on your boyfriend nor have you ever bullied Nayoung.

“Well at least she got her karma right?” The girl snorts. “Getting chlamydia, having all the guys lose interest in her and having no friends- well except you. I must say I admire you. I don’t know how you put up with such a mess.”

“I try my hardest.” You hear her giggle. “She’s a loner and a social freak, the least I could do is make sure she has at least a companion or who knows she might just end it all.” “Are you saying she’s suicidal?” “I’m saying who knows! You never know what people are thinking now a days.”

Your heart broke. All those accusations weren’t real and to think more people thought they were true hurt even more. You didn’t even realize you began to cry until you felt Jaemin wipe a tear away. They chatted for a few minutes before leaving and by then you have sat yourself down against the door. “Why would she lie?” You ask to no one.

Jaemin stayed quiet. Arms crossed and a clenched jaw, he immediately understood what Nayoung had done. “Isn’t it obvious?” Looking up at him with red swollen eyes you shake your head. “She spread false rumors about you!” “What why?”

“Come on baby.” Crouching down, he pulls a strand of hair behind your ear. “You’re gorgeous, sweet, smart. You’re everyone’s type.” “Are you saying she did it out of jealousy?” Scoffing you shake your head. “No, Nayoung is the pretty one. Everyone wants her.” “I don’t. I want you.” “You’re just saying that to make me feel better.” You scoff. “Okay then let’s talk to your ex.” “What why?” “Because we both know the cheater in your past relationship wasn’t you.” The memory still hurt. You never did find out who he cheated on you with only that he was ‘much happier’ and that you weren’t shit to him anymore.

“You’re wasting your time.” Shaking his head, he pulls out his phone and begins to search for his account. “What are you planning to do.” “We’re going to pay him a little visit. Come on let’s get dressed.”

“I don’t think this is such a good idea-“ Cutting you off by giving you a kiss, he gives you a smile. “Just hold my hand, he does anything to hurt you I promise I’ll kick his ass.” Walking into the cafe, you immediately spot your ex. Deep eye bags adorned his face, his hair was longer and dead. He looked much scrawnier and almost exhausted even. Taking a seat in front of you, you don’t have the words to even greet him.

“Y/n. Jaemin.” He speaks.

“What can i do for you.”

“The truth.” Jaemin cuts to the chase. Quirking his brow, he leans forward. “The truth?” “Who did you sleep with?” Jaemin tells him sternly. Scoffing, he chuckles dryly and shakes his head. “Why am I hearing an accusingly tone. Shouldn’t we start with who y/n slept with first?”

“I didn’t sleep with anyone.” You speak up.

“Right. Like I believe that-“

“Did Nayoung tell you anything.” Jaemin cut him off. “Nayoung helped me realize I was wasting my time on her.” He glares at you. “Did she tell you she was cheating?” Staying quiet, his face falls. “Why do you care?…wait aren’t you her boyfriend.” His jaw clenched and he sits up straighter.

“So you’re the guy she dumped me for.” Eyes widening, you look at him. “Nayoung was the girl you slept with?” Scoffing he shakes his head. “I didn’t sleep with her we only kissed.” He huffs. “She told me you cheated on me, she comforted me and we kissed. She had me to believe she wanted to be with me but when I broke things off with you she ghosted me.” The two of you send each other looks, “Why? Was that not what really happened?…”

You felt betrayed. You wonder how long has it been since she’s been a snake to you.

“She told me you kissed my boyfriend.”

“She said you had chlamydia.”

“I heard her say you were mentally unstable.”

You wanted to believe it was all a lie but it made sense why everyone suddenly avoided you like the plague. No one daring to befriend you or ever ask you out. You were sure you’d die a loner if it wasn’t for Nayoung and now you come to find out you were put into this situation because of her.

You couldn’t stop your heart from squeezing in agony. The friend you considered a sister you cared for so deeply had ruined your life out of what? Spite? Jealousy? Fun even?

The guilt you had building in you disintegrated almost instantly. You don’t have quite the perfect idea as to how you plan on getting even with her, how you’re going to help Jaemin get out of his god forsaken relationship with her, how you’re going to let the world know just how a trashy person she really is but you do know one thing, if you’re going to keep sleeping with her boyfriend you’re going to do it without a care in the world. Holding hands together literally behind her back when the three of you go out for ice cream, his subtle hand on your thigh when you go to the movies. The glances you give one another when you two had no other choice but to be dragged by her at a fancy restaurant with friends. Having sex in the parking lot after making an excuse to leave early. Making out while she’s showering and even sexting each other with her around. You no longer cared, and instead it made you just a tiny bit better knowing Nayoung no longer had it all,

“They completely cut me out and I don’t know why! Can you believe that?! After everything I did for them they have the audacity to treat me like dirt? And that’s not even mentioning the weird looks I’ve been receiving from guys. It’s like I’m infected or something.” No but rumors are you caught a case of syphilis

BUZZ…

Come over, I need you now.

Photo Sent

You were finally taking your life back from her. Piece by piece.

[warden-melli]

I remember how excited I was for X and Y to come out. I’d dreamed of a 3d pokemon game for as long as I could remember, and the hype leading up to those games being released was some of the best of any pokemon game ever. Fairy type, sylveon, character customisation and we all got to play it together for the first time. My favourite Pokémon of all time, Mewtwo, got TWO new forms via the most exciting feature I’d seen a Pokémon game add at that point, mega evolution! I couldn’t have been more excited

I saved for months and bought my 3ds (which I still have and use to this day. It’s pink a colour chosen specifically to be Sylveon themed) and went to the midnight launch. I picked my starter (A chespin I named Rook. Yes, I still have him too) and set off. X and Y was the game that got me into shiny hunting (chain fishing and the friend safari lol), and the meta. It was the first game I ever found pokerus, and it was so much fun relearning Pokémon types after the fairy shake up. Pokemon amie, the ghost girl, and whatever Sycamore and Lysandre had going on, I loved these games so much. They were even the first Pokemon games I got to use my new name in after coming out.

I played the game together with my friend, and as embarrassing as it is I actually cried at the end when Az was reunited with Floette. I remember feeling so overwhelmed (in a good way) during the end credits. I swear I’m the only pokemon fan who was glad that they never distributed Az’s Floette (even though it was found in the code) because I couldn’t stand the thought of the two being separated again

Tbh I even wonder if I’d have gotten so attached to Melli if not for X an Y and my fondness for Az. When I first saw him Melli’s hair reminded me a bit of Az’s, and with his height and flower theme I couldn’t help but think of Az more, and then I just kept finding more connections between the two. I may never have really paid much attention to him if not for Az, and that’s so funny to think about

I always felt like X and Y’s story wasn’t finished, and for years I’ve hoped they’d someday finish or expand on its story. There was so much left unexplained (ghost girl, letter, Zygarde) and I’ve spent a ton of time thinking about it over the years. I really hope that some of these questions finally get answers, and that just maybe we’ll get to spend some more time with King Az again. Up until now I thought it was me reaching or wishful thinking, but Kalos legends is real and it’s really happening and I’m so excited I haven’t stopped shaking since the announcement

[ryuichirou]

Replies

Some replies! Starting with the one about the Azul sketch from yesterday, Trey/Deuce (briefly), Azul/Malleus and some other stuff.

Anonymous asked:

Yes, my absolute octobaby. You’ll make them pay, we’ll show them. We’ll show them all.

(This is the start of my villain arc because Azul and his big eyes can have whatever they want. 😩)

Hehe thank you Anon! <3 Becoming a villain because of Azul’s big eyes is one of the most valid reasons that could exist…

Anonymous asked:

The legs are so beautiful in peak male performance, I want to DEVOUR THEM ALL.

(this is about this post)

Thank you so much, Anon!! Feel free to devour them! I am glad they look tasty <3

Anonymous asked:

Womb Tattoo Anon here. When I noticed how long it was taking for you to reply I knew I was in for something good! You never fail to deliver. But now you're teasing us with a potential Trey/Deuce ship?? How could you!

Womb Tattoo Anon, you’re back! I am happy you finally got your post after waiting for so long… and I am very glad you liked it <3

And yes indeed we are teasing you with a potential Trey/Deuce ship~ We’ve been thinking about them for a while now; they’re like a faraway land that is very wonderful, but we haven’t fully reached it yet… I still hope that we’ll dive into it at some point in the future.

They have some very fun interactions, but I hope to see more, plus to be honest one of the reasons they became a thing to us is their seiyuu working in BL together lol

Anonymous asked:

It's been a while since I've been through your blog, and I just saw your Azumal Fanart?! Omfg! I loved it! Are you and katsu shipping Azul x Malleus now?! Do you have any headcanons about these two??

I swear Azul has a thing for strong/powerful people with connections, lol.

(this is about this post)

Thank you, Anon!! <3 Like I mentioned in the other reply, I drew this particular fanart because of the random character kissing game that Katsu and I did, and Malleus got to smooch Azul. Both Malleus and Azul are twisted (heh) in their own way, and with Malleus being a tease and Azul not wanting to miss out on the opportunity to gain great connections with powerful people (+being enamoured because who wouldn’t be if Malleus smooches them), it could lead to some shenanigans.

That being said, this isn’t really a ship for us, we’re just entertaining the idea for now. So I don’t really have a lot of headcanons in my head... but I did mention them in this post about heat-of-the-moment hookups!

Here is one headcanon though! Azul doesn’t like dancing, but if he was to try dating Malleus (even if it’s just going on a singular date with him), they will absolutely dance. Malleus knows that Azul isn’t the best at it, but would dedicate all his free time to training to impress him (he did dance well in the Glorious Masquerade, after all), and knowing that, Malleus wouldn’t warn Azul beforehand that he is planning to dance with him. He just wants to see poor Azul stressed and constantly looking down at his feet while still trying to look like a proper gentleman, leading in a dance with a man 30 cm taller than him. Malleus would chuckle and say that his eyes are up here…

Anonymous asked:

Funny story, I actually went to AXCON in 2019 when they were hyping the release of Twisted Wonderland the next year and so I got to see the booth and such. I remember thinking that it looked good and that I was interested in playing it. When it came out, I downloaded it….and proceeded to not play it until last year. And that was only because my sister had seen stuff of Idia at another con, told me how his design looked neat and I suddenly remembered then game I got 958384972 years ago.

I’ve been hooked ever since. Incidentally, Idia’s my favorite.

Anon, I am so happy you found love. I am so happy Idia is your favourite lol I bet it’s very cool to be aware of twst from back in 2019, and then witnessing how it evolved over the years, even if you weren’t interested at first.

It’s like you look at the clock and decided one day… it’s time.

[yorgilord]

XENOBLADE Chronicles 3: One Year LATER

Or: one man’s unhinged ramblings on a game that may be one of their favorites of all time.

A few disclaimers before reading this:

1: this is an enormous wall of text. This is 11849 words long and by far the longest I’ve ever written, just as a heads up.

2: This will contain spoilers for the entirety of the Xenoblade series, not counting other Xeno games because I’m from Europe and I am someone who loves having physical copies, so it’s going to take a while before I get the chance to play those.

3: there will be minor to major grammatical issues and faulty sentence structures because I’ve started writing this on this on the 26th and I suck at grammar and don’t have the time to proofread the entirety. So, uh no beta we die like Hackt.

4: This is going to be mildly unhinged, filled with swearing and is highly subjective you’re allowed to have your own opinion nothing I say is a fact as I’m just as much a fan as you hopefully are.

5: if there is anything that I say in this text that may or may not be considered to be offensive please tell me and I’ll try to fix it.

As of today, it has been about a year since Xenoblade chronicles 3 first hit store shelves, and for many of us our home. Although it would be wrong to say that this game hasn’t been without its controversy the overall reception towards the game has been relatively positive. With people praising the characters, the music, the revamped combat system, etc. To me this is the first game in the series that came out with me being fully caught up in the hype cycle (I got introduced around 2016-17 through Chuggaaconroy his lp of XC1, the date may be off but I remember watching the lp either during or just after my burnout and that was about the time of my burnout, but wasn’t as of yet fully converted, that only came after playing the first game for myself on the new 2ds I bought specifically to play it, despite owning a Wii meaning it would be cheaper for me to buy a used Wii copy as I’m from the Netherlands and we actually had Wii copies of the game and they weren’t too expensive on the local version of e-bay, which is called Marktplaats (lit market place) but tbf I also really wanted to play that new fire emblem Musou game so yeah choices were made, I don’t know if they were great ones but they certainly were choices. Despite taking a bit to warm up to the game when watching the lp it was eventually love at first sight. Eventually I bought a switch in 2018 got xc2 and loved it, (not sure if in or despite of) its differences, managed to snag myself a collectors edition of DE where I played up until after the metal face fight on day 01. I really enjoyed my time with every game in the series, even picking up a Wii-u specifically for X late last year and despite the difficulties in adapting to its take on the game also loving it. So, you can probably guesstimate my reaction to the game being announced on the of February 2022. The hype cycle was amazing, watching every Luxin vid that came out learning more details about the game salivating over the first trailer, giving myself the habit to regularly check my mail multiple times a day in order to see if the pre-orders for the Collectors Edition were up yet (I still haven’t kicked it), fantasizing about the potential of the game and just in general good vibes. I did have some doubts about the game, wasn’t really feeling the clock theming and really hoped that the gameplay was more akin 1 than 2 (to put emphasis on this the last few times I played 1/de I played the entirety of the ether mine as Sharla and I enjoyed it, needless to say I really like the first game) What I really didn’t expect was for this game to become one of my fav games of the year and most likely of all time, up there with the golden cow that is XC 1 and joined by titles such as dark souls 3 (after I played it earlier this year), Shin Megami Tensei V, DMC V and Halo: Reach. To put it briefly, I love this game. Now to finally get to the point of this introductory piece: a few months ago after reading on reddit someone claiming that to fully get the game you should play it a few times I came to a realization, there were some things that I wasn’t too sure about, so you know what I decided I’m going to replay the game. And I’m going to write a piece about it, and you are reading that piece right now. So, without further ado these are my lightly structured and sorted thoughts and feelings on this beautiful game.

Ok so now before I get to praising the game for the way too many things it gets right, I do have a few gripes with the game itself. Gripe number 1: now this is more of a petty complaint but why can’t you level down before beating Z that’s a weird choice imo and makes it kind of annoying to return to older areas if you’re over leveled.  Gripe number 2: while I am glad that the game kind of returns to a more rigid style a-la xc1 when it comes to arts and such, I am kind of miffed by how they are implemented. I prefer my RPGS with characters that have rigidly defined roles and while I think that versatile parties can be fun to play around with, i.e. I love the challenge of putting together a party to specifically counter bosses in Megami Tensei games, I still in a sense prefer the games that force you to be creative in the constraints you’re given. And if I’m going to be real here this game plays, at least to me, a bit too fast and lose with those constraints, which annoys me but only mildly and not enough to detract from the joy of playing this piece of perfection. Gripe number 3 whose idea was it to not put location names on the map? I want to talk with them not hurt them, just talk. Gripe 4: the tutorials are way too overbearing. Gripe 5: I would prefer if there were more quests to be found on the world map instead of through idea bubbles, i.e., give me more X less the worst segments of persona 4. Gripe number 6: I dislike how relatively speaking the Agnian trio has less focus put on them in comparison to the Kevesi trio, at least when it comes to the main story. I have more but those will come up when I feel its necessary. Those are just however gripes and not anything major just minor annoyances, ok some are not so minor, but they don’t ruin the game.

Chapter 1: Ouroboros

“Fighting to live and living to fight” Those were the first words we heard in the first teaser trailer on that fateful day and those are also some of the first words we hear used in the game. And they describe the vibes that Aionios gives at first glance pretty well. The first chapter of the game is a bloody violent introduction to the world of Aionios it tells us in plain simple language hey, you there, welcome to hell. It introduces us to the colony system, to the flame clock and how it enforces a constant need for bloodshed, and it showcases how this affects the soldiers. A neat thing about this chapter is in how it directly showcases the power the flame clock has over its victims through integrating the flame clock as a mechanic that the player has to deal with. The opening of the game swiftly introduces us to the sheer brutality of this world by showcasing the battle between the Kevesi colony 9 (not that one) and the Agnian colony Sigma (male) which is shown in brutal bloody detail. What I love about this opening is the sheer sense of scale that is seen in this battle, which has, to my imperfect knowledge, only been seen in e.g., the battle of sword valley, the defense of NLA and the assault on / defense of the life hold core. The aftermath of this battle also showcases the mundane evil that the war makes the soldiers commit, i.e., the Kevesi soldiers casually trampling over the Agnian husks. This is also the first showcase of the sheer level of dehumanization that both sides employ on their enemies, which will come up later.

The section in colony 9 is also a good showcase of how despite the ever-present war and the constant violence a simulacrum of normal life is still possible and ongoing. Which in a profoundly fucked up sense is beautiful if you ask me. That despite the horrid dehumanization of the soldiers, the abuse that the consuls lash out, the ever-present threat of death. Life is still ongoing, no matter how shallow or how much of a simulacrum it is. I like this. In a sense it’s the idea of the indomitable human will when faced with the horrid oppressive cards that they are dealt. Which makes the position of Off-seer a small mercy granted to the soldiers, a sense of comfort to the warriors, a sense of peace not permitted to those who die on the slaughter fields of Aionios. And I love this section, the sense of atmosphere it has is unparalleled in my opinion and only rivaled, at least to me, by the Li Garte Prison Camp section. Also, as an aside I really fucking love the highly distinct uniforms that the Kevesi and Agnian forces have. Each uniform just looks so good. The black colors, almost skintight suits and visors found in the Kevesi army. The borderline Wuxia white robes, kabuto helmets and Japanese inspired aesthetic of the Agnian army. God, I just love those designs.

The introduction of Moebius D&J, although its mainly Dirk in control for this part as a misdirection, is masterfully done. Give the player what looks like a standard assignment, make it become more shifty by introducing the first hints of the lost numbers, through the automatons and later Guernica, and then pull the rug completely by revealing a monster which just doesn’t fit in with the local fauna and flora, which as an aside I have to say I really like, and by that I mean REALLY LIKE, the character designs of the Moebius and Ouroboros, (I guess I should thank CHOCO for this one huh), that are found in this game. They just feel so wrong, so unnatural, so borderline mechanical, like they saw the idea of the uncanny valley and decided to hike right into it. Their designs are, at least to me, perfect, which makes the fact that every single moebius, not counting FR, has a unique design personality and powerset especially amazing. And I really like how they sell the difficulty to beat and sheer power of the Moebius.

The introduction of the ouroboros into the story is also beautiful and one of the more wonderful scenes that is found in the game. And I really like the speech that D gives when the transformation takes place is amazing.

(Credits to the Xenoseries wiki for the script.)

“Noah: What...? This hand...

Noah & Mio: Is it...mine?

Noah & Mio: Huh? H-how are you inside me?!

Noah & Mio: Inside...? Hold on... Are we...?!

Moebius: (chuckling)      Well, you sure catch on quick. So you got yourselves an Interlink going, eh? Guess I've gotta give the old fool credit where it's due.

Noah & Mio: Interlink?

Moebius: Well, whatever. That form you just merged into? It's called "Ouroboros". Sear that into yer skulls.

Noah: Ouroboros?

Moebius: Oh, and... Me, I'm Moebius. We look a bit alike, don't we? When Keves and Agnus come together in unity, you're practically one step away from being on the same level as us.

Noah: So we're...

Mio: one being...?

Moebius: Ehh, to put it bluntly, you're failures. Fact is, the two of us are mortal enemies.

Noah & Mio: Enemies?

Moebius: You got the picture? No further questions? Then let's get back on the dance floor!”

The fact that the ouroboros team are not immediately friendly with each other and there’s still some minor hostility among them is Imo pretty good. I really like that. Because their lives as of that point have been spent fighting each other and it is only through this incident that they become friends and teammates. Which at least to me feels somewhat realistic, only joining forces after being forced to abandon their own colonies due to the influence of Moebius and their weird mind control censor powers. Also I am mildly annoyed by the fact that it is jingoistic Gigantus instead of Rotbart, I mean I know that bombastic Rotbart jr is a thin but still. I’d really just prefer it if it was Rotbart.

So that was chapter one of the game, and I’m going to end it with a bit of a hot-take. I feel like this first chapter is one of the best introductions in the entire series. It has the atmosphere, it has the vibes, it has the beautiful music, it has a very engaging hook, and in general I really like this. I mean yes, the battle of sword valley, Mechon assault on colony 9 and Shulk’s vow for revenge from 1, destruction of earth and waking up on Mira from X, and the awakening of Pyra from 2 are fucking iconic, not counting any dlc here just the full games. But yes, I really do think that the introduction to this game is the best one in the series. This is however only an introduction, the real fun is just about to begin in.

Chapter 2: Moebius

This chapter of the game is when the story really gets going as it details the journey to the Aetia region, through the Eagus wilderness and leads to the confrontation with Colony 4, the resolution of that conflict and their departure for the Ribbi Flats. You know I really like the chapter transition screen which are formatted like entries from Mio’s diary which I feel like is a nice touch. This chapter also introduces us to one of the most important characters to the story Ethel. And I really like Ethel. The presence of Ethel in the story is used for some fun stuff.

One of the first scenes in this chapter shows us the beginnings of the friendship between Lanz and Sena and I really like this. Sena and Lanz are just best muscle buddies, can be interpreted as both romantic and platonic could go either way. But yeah, I really like how despite Lanz being the one most adverse to the team-up, next to Taion, he’s also the first one to actually befriend his Agnian counterpart. Also, since I haven’t mentioned this anywhere, I’ll mention this here. CHARACTER DESIGNS ARE FUCKING PEAK. THANK YOU, MAGATSU SAITO-SAMA, FOR GIVING US THESE CHARACTER DESIGNS AND OUTFITS. But yeah, I really like those designs and their characters, just heads up but Eunie best girl I will not elaborate. But yeah, the first section of this chapter is pretty good. What follows is the “water” and the Eagus wilderness, one of my favorite regions in this game when it comes to the aesthetic, Maktha is the best I will elaborate on this later, also as an aside but think that Mio’s entire bit with having difficulties with heat is a reference to the Japanese concept of “ 猫舌” which roughly translate to cat’s tongue, or rather to quote Wiktionary “(idiomatic) being incapable of drinking or eating anything hot (high temperature) due to having an overly sensitive tongue” This makes the fact that someone from Gormotti descent such as Mio, assuming that Nia has passed the Gormotti genetics she acquired from eating the flesh of her sister down, a bit hilarious and most likely highly intentional. The introduction to Chain attacks is logical and it is interesting to see how they come upon the idea of working together to kill that one really hard to kill Aspar. What makes that one Aspar so difficult to kill? But that gets us to the battle with colony 4.

I really like the conflict that the battle with colony 4 imposes upon the members of Ouroboros, and it is a great expansion upon the ideas shown in chapter 1 with the mind control abilities that moebius has, and the power of Moebius in general. Speaking of which, I love how Moebius are fully introduced in this chapter, and specifically the hierarchy, of Moebius, or rather lack of hierarchy among Moebius. In a sense the ranks of Moebius are egalitarian, each of the Moebius are only loyal to Z and the freedom that is granted to them by Z. It also introduces us to the apparent true nature and behavior of the members of Moebius. And it does this through the presence of K. The moebius are in this game childlike to say the least. They are constantly pursuing the joy and ecstasy of the highest order. They do this through the pursual of their twisted desires, whether this is through slowly orchestrating the demise of their own colony, taking to the seas as a man of the sea, acting like the director of a stage play, being a wannabe tactician or in the case of K just the childlike pleasure of killing your foes. I also think that K has a few of the best one liners in the game.

“Hahahahaha! My dear boy... Your vaunted intuition... is shit!!!” or “It's the big bad boss. Boo!”

K also leads us to the first true battle with a Moebius and the first use of the second Moebius battle theme. And hoo boy this fight is truly a banger like for real I love each and every single moebius battle and the music that accompanies it. I thought about doing a ranking of my favorite battle themes from the game, but I’m going to be frank here EVERY. SINGLE. VARIATION. OF. THE. MOEBIUS. THEME. WOULD. WIN. I really like bombastic faux opera ok, God Shattering Star is one of my favorite boss themes sue me all right.

It also features the full awakening of the Kevesi Ouroboros and I have to say I really like each and every first transformation, the mindscape the foreshadowing through shards of fragmented memories and the unity of Keves and Agnus in what I now realize is foreshadowing of what happens when they combine for too long as the animation is pretty similar to the annihilation event we are shown in the first scene of the game. And now we move on to the next part.

Chapter 3: Saffronias

This chapter, at least to my opinion, is peak Taion. Like this is his chapter.

The aftermath of the battle is also pretty interesting in how it shows the difficulties of overcoming the programming and hatred of the soldiers and how they try to adapt to life outside of the flame clock system, while also showing through that one asshole Homs that some are not so willing to overcome their prejudices. And then we get the first hero quest and the introduction to the class system. I have my gripes with the class system like mentioned earlier but overall, I like how it is presented in the game and I also like how the full customization of the heroes is locked behind beating the game, due to the aforementioned reasons.

This is also the point where the game really begins opening up to the player and granting them the choice to begin on the abundant, to put it extremely lightly, side content of the game. And hoo boy is it meaty. We first get multiple colonies to liberate and heroes to recruit with every colony also having quest lines of varying length associated with them and every colony questline delving from a differing perspective into the question of “What now?” and I do love how this varies for each colony depending on their situation. 9 has issues with acquiring food and therefore eventually turns to the farming of spongy spuds, while also reorienting the entirety of Zeon’s character around them. Gamma goes on with Teach upholding his role as a mentor to his soldiers, 30 is finally free to pursue the special interests of its commander and goes full ham on the construction of Levnises. Etcetera etcetera. Another point I really like is how the presence of gray gives hints to the involvement of the city in the larger politics of Aionios, which the player might pick up upon, but could also easily miss. I’m going to talk about each hero when they first become available, skipping ethel due to her being locked off for a large part of the game.

So first off, we have Valdi I like the goober. Like some may have picked up from the earlier word choice I choose to interpret him as being at least somewhere on the spectrum and having a fascination with Levnises. But I like him and specifically how he grows to detest the use of Levnises as weapons of war, eventually becoming more pacifistic. The fact that gruff Lanz is also acting like a brother to him is extra fun and cute. His class is reasonably useful in the early game but sadly becomes overshadowed the further it goes.

Zeon. I like how he has difficulties with reconciling the fact that ouroboros abandoned the colony and how he tries to somehow accept their help. I also really like how his entire arc is about attempting to wrangle his colony unto the path forward, I remember the colony 9 storyline being one of the darker ones and really showing the difficulties of life without the support from the castles. It’s a shame then that I only really used his class to get topple on some characters due to it being the only source of master arts that make one able to topple until you get Cammuravi.

Teach his quest is fun in how it in a sense is the complete opposite of Zeon’s quest. Where the ouroboros were welcomed with hostility in 9, Gamma opens them with wide arms and Teach at first seems friendly. And then we get his maelstrom of power speech which I find truly fascinating, I like teach. He’s cool. And I especially like how he chose to be a teacher when granted the choice by G. Also, his class is extremely useful due to his ability to both remove debuffs and grant atk up to party members in the area.

As I am also discussing the available dlc, not Future Redeemed cause I haven’t got the time to do so even if I wanted to, I’m also going to talk about Ino. She’s really interesting in how she basically acts upon xc2 rules with her being an artificial blade and like Poppi a Nopon in a humanoid body, although she acts more like a stereotypical Nopon than Poppi ever did. But yeah, I like Ino I do however agree that her voice is a bit difficult to get used to and can be a bit grating the first time. But overall, I like her character and gimmick of having to collect ether to level her. Which is fun at least to me as it gives you a long-term goal to work towards. Her class is also really good in chain attacks to increase the damage.

Gray. I like him, he’s mysterious. I like his fatherlike bond with Eunie. I like the gameplay of his class, especially the positioning pro skill which oh god yes that is so fucking good, especially when combined with unsheathing lucky 7 because it shortens the rotation to get that to cooldown. But yeah, I like gray and how he leaves a bit of a mystery to the story while also hinting at the presence of lost numbers even more than Guernica and co. Also, he’s basically fucking Kakashi but with guns.  His quest is also interesting and is the first hint at the larger significance of the mysterious items we later learn to be origin shards.

Seeing as this is where she first becomes available, I’m also going to talk about Alexandria. Mythrakid suspect number two here is interesting. I like how you can fight her early but have to wait until chapter 5 to truly have a fair chance to beat her hero quest. But yeah, hers is in a sense the most traditional liberation of a colony due to the fact that you actually have to fight your way to Iota and have to beat both dame Alex and E before actually talking with Alexandria and liberating the colony from the clock.

Whew that was a detour now back to the plot. The conversation at the foot of the Saffronia tree is the first insight we as players get into the mindset of Taion and the trauma he endured, besides from the fragmented memories shown in his fusion with Eunie. And I have to say that I really didn’t expect much from him when the game first released, he seemed to be the calm aloof tactical guy whose aloofness would be used for comedy more than would be interesting. But he really surprised me, especially the scene with him recognizing the fears that Eunie has and thinking of a way he is able to help her. And thus, leading to the beautiful tea scene and one of my favorite deep bonding conversations while beautiful music plays™ that are found all over the game.

Riku and Manana’s hero quest is interesting as it takes up almost the entirety of the Urayan caverns which I have to say are just kind of sad to look at, recognizing the ruins of a once great society now crumbled to nothing, due to years of war and thousands of years without maintenance. But going back to Riku and manana I like them. They’re both “common variety Nopon” although manana is way more common variety Nopon than Riku I feel like. But yeah, I like both of them. Especially the fact that they provide a different type of humor from the main Nopon of the past few games. And I admire how in certain parts manana tries to keep spirits high despite the circumstances. But yeah, they are good. I also really like the fact that they contextualize the food bonuses and gem crafting found in this game, xc1 gems are better sue me these are just worse aux cores, and their hero quest is wholesome goodness, with minor angst about R&M being unable to fight, nothing more to add.

The section of being pursued by the forces of lambda has an amazing atmosphere and I love the effect of the smoke appearing on the floor. I mean I get why we couldn’t have something like the poisoned sections from ps4 Spiderman, but this is still pretty good for the limitations. I also really fucking love the effect of the red moebius eyes cutting through the fog. Then we get to the battle with Lambda, and I have to say hats off to mister Ian Bouillion he’s pretty good and it is amazing that he plays both the seething hatred of the mud clone and the calm gentleness of the normal Isurd. But yeah, this battle is one of the larger spectacles in the game with you actually fighting the Ferronis itself which is if I’m correct only beaten by the battle with Zu Pharg in X in regards to the scale of a fight in this series. And yeah, this entire part rocks and the culmination with the awakening of the Agnian ouroboros is amazing. Seeing Taion & Eunie lift up from the water and cloning themselves, Sena taking the lead and Lanz & Sena tipping the entire colony and the Mio & Noah dodging all those attacks. I also love the aesthetics of these ouroboros and feel like I actually prefer their general aesthetic over that of the Kevesi ouroboros, to add to this Sena & Lanz is my favorite ouroboros design.

The J reveal is one of the more impactful reveals in the game and one that some maybe saw coming from a mile away. But I was fully taken by surprise by this reveal. It is, however, a great reveal. And adds a lot of drama to the mix with Joran’s death being the catalyst for Lanz’s growth he now has to face a version of Joran completely unlike whom he remembered. And just wow Despite this being mainly Taion’s chapter, and thus mainly Olivier Huband his time to shine, Jack Bardoe absolutely kills it as Lanz iirc.

And then we get to the ending scene of the chapter Noah and Mio sending off the mud husks that were killed by J. and I feel like many moments with the weight of life playing that it is a profound moment of just wonder and sadness.

Overall whereas chapters 1 and 2 are more introductory I feel like chapter 3 really gets the ball rolling with the main conflict and themes, but that’s just an opinion. So next up is.

Chapter 4: Life

This chapter is amazing and may just be my favorite chapter in the game, yes, I know end of 5 and beginning of 6 is amazing but I feel like I prefer chapter 4’s content as a package.

However, I must interrupt the journey deeper into the Pentelas region with a minor distraction to talk about Isurd. Isurd as a character is one of the less remarkable Heroes, I think he’s cool with his tactical behavior and his skills are just amazing to use. But his class is mostly a mainstay in large parts of my playthrough, I do however feel that he’s a at some times a bit unremarkable, I do however like his grown interest / obsession with hot springs in his ascension quest.

So, we begin with the jolly walk from the falls into Maktha with the conspicuously placed Umber Drague. I don’t know why it’s there, I have no explanation for why it’s there it’s just there to give the characters a convenient excuse to experience the time limit of their interlink, as an aside if you’re really desperate for an explanation but can also enjoy some comedy I’m just going to leave this https://archiveofourown.org/works/45594703 here cause its hilarious and y’all should read it.

Afterwards we move past the falls and into my favorite (aesthetically) area of the game, the Maktha Wildwood. In order to explain why I’m going to give an example using the last of us. There are two types of people who play the last of us. Those who enjoyed the series and want to try the game, those who like / dislike the game, and then there’s me who plays it to enjoy the overgrown modern city aesthetic. And that is why I love Maktha. This beautiful fusion paradoxical of the Bionis region with the highest density of plant growth animal wildlife and overall jungle vibes, mixed together with the lifeless desolated hellscape that is Morytha. I love this place from an aesthetic point of view. However, from a level design point of view, from the perspective of this layperson who has never touched level editing software and whose opinion is therefore factually wrong, it sucks and is too confusing. I prefer the level design found in the Fornis region over this entire region. Pentelas has just a few too many bottomless pits for my taste, same for the Keves castle region and upper Aetia.

The they/them person of royalty and holy they/them agnussy themselves Juniper is fucking based. I like their character a lot and think that it is interesting how their colony lived a low sustenance lifestyle and had some sort of survival of the fittest mentality. What makes it more interesting to me is how this all apparently planned out by U, which makes me feel like U may or may not have known Juniper in their original life and that U has somehow done this more often. I do like colony Tau though. It is a pretty cool colony, the Ferronis makes me think of Nopon. But yeah, I like it. It is cool, it’s a shame though that I almost never play as Juni or their class because it is slow, and I do not understand it due to my brain being a bit too smooth and preferring arts spammy builds. (/s)

The flute scene is one of the more beautiful scenes in the game and I feel like this entire chapter has loads of introspective conversation and speeches about you know life the meaning of it the value of it. The flute exchange scene is just one of many that I feel are extremely profound.

This is followed up by the duel with Cammuravi and Ethel while the fight in itself is one of the best this game has to offer, I feel like the story revolving it is even worthier of being one of the coolest and best character driven parts of the game.  The fact that Cammuravi and ethel have this realization that they can make their own choices, that Cammuravi rips out his own eyeball in order to remain in control of his own actions. And then their shared murder suicide is just wow, it is a beautiful scene, being one of the most profound scenes in the game imo, being a beautiful scene that showcases the themes of the game pretty fucking well. And fuck dude. It’s just beautiful.

The following action scene with O&P is also pretty amazing. Mio’s sheer rage over the behavior of O&P, the following part wherein every member basically joins Mio in solidarity and the 6 of them all give O&P a piece of their thoughts and really just fucking go off on them. I love this scene. The action scene following this is also a beautifully choreographed scene where I really love the beautiful choreography. Especially that first uninterrupted scene, with the female ouroboros constantly assaulting O&P with the first notes of weight of life playing in the background is just so beautiful. The sheer power that exudes from O&P just seconds before the annihilation effect starts, and then Noah and Mio REMOVING A PIECE OF LAND USING LUCKY 7, just to get them away from the annihilation event. This revelation also sort of allows me to think a bit deeper about the nature of the ouroboros time limit. Cause I feel like this time limit can be explained simply by thinking through the effects of an annihilation event. So, like an annihilation event is simply a reaction similar to the idea of annihilation we can see in quantum mechanics. Matter and antimatter collide and vanish. So, like ouroboros and moebius grow from their core. So, I feel like their core is the fused state of the interlink. So, Noah and Mio, Eunie and Taion, Lanz and Sena, D&J etc. This core is an overlap between Agnian and Kevesi matter and sustains a construct, the sustaining of this construct takes energy, energy which would be needed to keep the core stable and an annihilation event at bay. But then it gets too much. The energy is expended, and then it gets too much. Which leads to it drawing in the fog and an annihilation event taking place. Or at least that’s how it feels like. I mean I do not know quantum mechanics, but I feel like this is a possible explanation for the time limit that I have thought way too much about.

The seeing off of Cammuravi and ethel is also beautiful which is great imo just another beautiful way of life performance.

Kevesi castle region is cool, I like the castle, too many bottomless pits, but yeah, I like it. Also, it contains my favorite hero in the game Ashera. I love her colony and her story. Hell in the one piece of fanfiction I’ve written as of today in this fandom is partially about Ashera, or at least contains her as a perspective, and I really like her character. Especially how her entire persona is a bit of a façade for the truly damaged soul that lives behind it, especially her fear of dying at her homecoming.   Which wow, I’m also going to be frank she’s the main hero I’ve used throughout the game. Cause you know I am a sucker for the big damage numbers that she brings. But yeah, Ashera is one of my favorite characters and I really like her relationship with Eunie, I am not sure if I consider them a friend or relationship, but I just really like their relationship in general whether it be romantic or platonic. Also, like said earlier, I really just like her character and the references she makes to imo the best character from XC1. I really do hope that she’s a good sister to panacea outside of Aionios.

The castle infiltration is imo pretty cool, especially the getting in, the fighting through the soldiers and then. A second encounter with DJ. I like the second DJ fight, it feels cool. And I love how Eunie tries to overcome her own trauma and fears, or more specifically how she utilizes her trauma and fear and behavior that D expects from her as a weapon to make DJ underestimate her and how she eventually manages to overtake him. I really like this fight ok. Also, Mythrakid suspect number one is just a villain I love to hate.

I love the bait and switch of the annihilator seeming to be the climax of the chapter, but then pulling the rug from underneath you and then throwing you into a battle with the Kevesi Queen, best girl of the first game MELIA motherfucking ANTIQUA. And wow, just wow. I remembered being panicked and having a feeling of holy shit we’re fighting her now. Last year when I first played the game, keeping in mind that I expected there to be 10 chapters instead of 7, but now I can recognize it as the midpoint of the game and in that sense, I love the battle. And the music the fucking music. I remembered reading around release that people compared it to the music from souls and now having played the games and defeated gale in 5 attempts, I do have to say that yeah it fits. False queens are one of the most foreboding and intense battle themes in the game.  This combined with the first in many revelations about the true nature of the cycle of life in Aionios is just wow. I love this game. But that’s it for this chapter and just like the ouroboros escaped the Castle I will now be escaping to.

Chapter 5: Eclipse

This chapter contains some of the most iconic moments that are found in this game imo. First off, we get the reveal of the city and the reactions that the party has to the “true nature of the world” or something like that. And wow the scene with the baby is just so moving it’s so cute and adorable, I love how Taion just fucking melts, and I like the comedy that comes from A Eunie’s afterward seeming obsession with babies and B knowing that Riku most likely got a bit lost in character during that scene, or he has never seen a Homs birth and Nopon births are even weirder than we can possibly imagine.

The city also can be a bit shadier I feel like than it at first seems to be. Cause I really feel like that’s important to take in mind. This is a society in which the fact of life is that procreation is expected and necessary, cause Shania’s whole deal is definitely an example of the shit that the city would likely put people through, or at least the people who live there put others through. Cause I feel like you know the city is but one place, and less populous than it was in its first incarnation. And as can be taken from the fact that everyone looks like a baseline human / homs implies that a lot of “breeding” has taken place to make everyone so homogenized. Especially because of the diversity that can be seen at the liberator base in FR.

Speaking of FR, we due to that have also the confirmation that the lady Masha, the second dlc hero, is descendent of the one and only ZEKE VON GENBU BRINGER OF CHAOS WIELDER OF THE PURPLE LIGHTNING DREAM SMASHER GRANTED TO HIM BY HIS BELOVED LIFE PARTNER AND COMPANION PANDORIA AND THEIR PET TURTERS. So yes, we can therefore sort of confirm that being a theater kid may or may not be genetically hereditary, in spite of how serious and borderline dour Linka can be, I haven’t completed every quest in FR yet shame on me indeed. But yeah, I like the gameplay and behavior of Masha she’s a very fun borderline ojousama archetype, which is one of my fav archetypes, who’s also skilled in her craft. Also, I really like using her class, and her model is just amazing just wow. Also, it hits a few of the archetypes that I like. But yeah, I enjoy her character a lot. And like said earlier I love playing her class because it can be a lot of broken fun, I mean not as broken as an l7 based flash fencer build, I used it I do not apologize. But still very fun.

Another hero I gained access to at this point was Monica, she gave me one of the final keys necessary to fully break the game. Smash as an art. Usable in chain attacks. After this I just managed to break the game.

But yeah, the Cadensia region it’s pretty cool, lots of water so yeah there’s that. We need a boat. Like stated earlier, I dislike the boat controls, but I do love the overhaul that this game has made to water based combat by actually allowing the player to fight while submerged in water. But yeah, the Cadensia region, being one of the largest single maps in the entire game is fucking enormous and imma be real I like it. It feels nicely balanced between the marshes of the great sword base and the large open Erythia sea with its many islands. Only real issue I have is that some islands are a pain to navigate, e.g., Daedal Isle. But overall Cadensia cool, also I like the upgraded ship theme, but the original ship theme is better.

I do enjoy the steps involved in getting to the Li Garte Prison Camp and I like that it is not as easy as 1 2 3 boom completed. Such as infiltrating the radar base and having to attain some more geological data.

While drifting, maybe at night and while being carried by the waves, one may encounter an island where one can see the mighty colony 15 stride across. I like the pirate theming of colony 15 it feels different from the other colonies, although this has to do with the dementia grandpa that’s T(riton). I like how this quest shows the playful and childlike nature of Moebius from the perspective of the one good consul who is so old that he has grown past his murderous and childlike glee and is now just looking for equals. And I really like how T chooses to aid Ouroboros despite them being natural enemies. I’m even more confused as to why Z allows him to still use his powers, although that’s likely explained by him making that so because it amuses him. Anyways I like t and I prefer his create your own op class mechanic over the complicated tiger tiger addiction inducing mess that is Poppi qtπ, even though I do have my own minor gripes with the skill upgrading system, more specifically the borderline ludicrous requirements to fully level every art and skill. I also, however, love the fact that Eunie has to ask permission to punch him and the fact that Noah grants it.

The other colony with an unusual moebius would be colony Mu, I do love the minor mystery revolving round the identity of the consul and where the flame clock is placed. Also, I love mu’s Ferronis design and how it harkens to Raijin, I think? But yeah, I like mu and Fiona’s class is also broken as fuck. Also, mu contains the best NPC Nico, who is the girl that I am referring to in this sentence yup that is her Nico, she’s cute. Or well one of the cuter characters in the game. Just like Fiona. I like how her entire story is revolved around both: oh god Irma’s the consul and oh god how will I deal with the fact that Irma is dead. Also, if I’ve read it right there are also some self worth issues involved? I���m going to be frank I don’t have a really good grasp on her character, I like her dynamic with Lanz however it Is very cute, just like her nicknames.

Also this is where the first side stories and ascension quests really start opening up, I think at least with the ascension quests, which I am going to cover, not going to deal with the ascension quests, because I only completed like 4 of them and I can quickly summarize my views on them I think.

Ethel: see Cammuravi.

Valdi: I remember thinking it was fun but am also somewhat confused as to why they didn’t make the completion ­of Dorin the ascension.

Zeon: Spongy spuds. That is all.

Teach: I like the reveal of his past as Oleg and it recontextualizes his speech about maelstroms of power.

Riku & Manana: Manana gets a better pot, I mainly remember it because you need to complete it for the 7 legendary Smithpon.

Gray: like how this quest shows more examples of dissent in the city, the role that gray plays in keeping the peace and his bond with his wife Rozana.

Alexandria: I like how this entire quest is about the secrets that Dame Alex has while also adding some complexity to the mix.

Ino: This quest Is just sheer Nopon hilarity, and I love the Xenoblade 2 callback, also as an aside I am highly disappointed that it wasn’t a red pollen orb. I was actively saddened by this, and this impacted my day very negatively.

Isurd: I like his quest also I feel it is interesting how the entire quest is basically Karōshi prevention. Dude needs some hot springs.

Juniper: I like how this quest deals with the manipulation of the consul of the colony. Also, I like Juniper. Hope Kite at least has the chance with them.

Ashera: Depression hidden behind a layer of suicidal aggression. One of the beset side quests for one of the best heroes imo.

Monica: That one dude is a Milf hunter, and I appreciate his dedication.

Masha: I like how this gives more insight into the somewhat more depressing lives of the lost numbers and their desire to be remembered or leave memories behind.

Fiona: This one deals with the secrets of Irma and how Fiona struggles to reconcile with them I like it.

Triton: dementia grandpa has dementia, it is not funny, it actually is kind of funny, but also just somewhat sad. However also “…Just one.”

Ghondor: this one’s ok, not much to it. I do like the Tirkins, I actually really like how this game tries to humanize the Tirkins way more.

Miyabi: cooking. It is fun. Nothing to add really. Oh yeah finding the ingredients is a pain if I remembered it correctly.

Cammuravi: this is not a quest, this is 4-5 cutscenes stitched together.

Segiri: I don’t remember too much from this one, but I am sad that you have to kill her sister.

But leaving those behind we get to the first side stories.

Eunie is an interesting inspection of the system of colony ranks and gives more insight into how much the system is rigged to kill the soldiers in Aionios and allow the Moebius to harvest their life. I also like how the game uses this quest to follow up on Eunie finding her own husk on the ruins of that battlefield, and also explains as to why that happened. But yeah, this one’s cool and I also like that it gives a part of the spotlight to Brolearis.  What I don’t get however is why the spark is this required to fight X in origin. Like seriously why? That does not make any goddamn sense. Monolithsoft, I love the games that you develop but its choices like this which keep me up at night.

Lanz his side story is also excellent in that it allows him to deal with the demons of his past while also foreshadowing the clock fuckery that Y commits later I the game. I also feel like it is an excellent showcase of his character growth up until this point, with him realizing that there’s more to life than just fighting.

The Li Garte Prison Camp section and Ghondor. I do like this section and feel that it is interesting in how it uses frustrating and repetitive quests to keep the player in a constant state of numbness and boredom in order to simulate the experience of being imprisoned there. As for Ghondor I wonder could you call the quests surrounding the camp her hero quest by technicality because you get her after completing the quests. Idfk. But back to the topic I do like Ghondor. Yes, she’s a foul mouthed midget who could punch my lights out for saying that, but I do like her softer moments such as the fondness she has for her mother’s cooking and her friendship with sena and the way in which she forgives Shania. Yeah, she’s a little bastard, but I feel that her heart’s in the right place. Her class is ok, I don’t mind playing it, but I don’t agree with the talent art, due to me preferring spammy builds. 

When it comes to the escape portion of the chapter, I do not think that I have words enough to describe just how perfect this entire piece is. The constant tension regarding M & N the mystery they present, the beautifully executed foreshadowing, the beautiful and amazing M remixes of the moebius themes, the beautiful choreography in one of the most impressive long takes I’ve seen in a game, and the sheer despair of the prison. The fact that the vocal song is used to display the sheer hopelessness of the situation and how almost everything Mio says takes on a double meaning when you realize that it is M speaking. The excruciatingly tearjerkingly beautiful tones of a life sent on blaring as M is coming home and the amazing voice acting from Harry McEntire. I cannot put into words just the sheer excellence of this sequence which once again brought tears to my eyes and left me distraught in ways I seldom experience. I have no funny jokes or quips here, just hats off to the sheer excellence of this section.

Chapter 6: Choices

I’ve also got nothing but praise for the beginning part of this chapter. The reveal of n’s past the fact that he destroyed the city to revive Mio, Future Redeemed makes it more complicated but sticking to the main game here, the turning of the tables, n’s breakdown, the battle against N, the unsheathing of lucky 7 leading to even more brokenness, the battle against the Agnian queen, the bait and switch with he city, Shania’s suicide, hopes rest the destruction of hope’s rest. Just wow I have so much good things to say about this part that I feel like I can’t even put it into words, so I’ll leave it to holy fuck this is impressive.

Captocorn peaks are ok in comparison to the peak of the other snow areas, Valak, Tantal, the black mountains Captocorn is ok, not excellent but ok. What I do like however is the hero quests that are found in this region. So, let’s talk about them.

First off let’s get going with Mio’s side story / the Miyabi fun hour. This infodumps the information that we could glance from the first Kevesi and Agnian ouroboros fusions, A Miyabi was once Mio’s friend, B Miyabi is dead. I also like the presence of Y in this quest and how the thing that beats him is the flutes. BECAUSE FLUTES RULE BABY, in this case at least. A thing that however confuses me is the fact that only at this point do they introduce the burst mechanic through a tutorial which is weird seeing as the player could have used burst way earlier in the game if they got Teach. But anyway, that’s besides the point, I also however like that this is another point I can add to the reincarnation cycle is imperfect agenda.

Cammuravi’s hero quest is somewhat interesting in how it is somewhat about the revival of Cammuravi and showcases the consequences of his resurrection. Also, him remembering Ethel, having his left eye damaged and still hurting from the self inflicted harm. Also, I really like his mantra and how he calms himself using it. Also, his fear of heights is extremely relatable.

But with those done I can now deal with the most complicated to access hero quest in the game which is of course Segiri’s inhumanity.  While I do have to say that I love the fact that it is payoff from something that happened most likely 25 hours ago. But I do feel like however that the fact that it is so confusing to access is annoying, and dislike how it is so easy to miss this quest. Because of that This is the only, non postgame exclusive, hero quest I did in the postgame the first time around.

The entire Cloudkeep section is pretty good. I got emotional when drifting soul started playing, I was surprised by the fact that they actually had the balls to kill Nia so soon after she was reintroduced, I liked the final brawl with DJ, the first time we get to fight D and J separated, the conclusion to Joran’s tale and Lanz’s arc, the reveal / reminder that Nia’s a Flesh Eater blade and therefore unkillable except if her core’s damaged. While I do agree that the later parts of Xenoblade 3 are weaker than the earlier ones I still feel that this is as good as the earlier parts.

Chapter 7: Time Moves Again

The same can be said for chapter 7, except when it comes to the fetch quest, I fully agree that almost every part of the fetch quest is just not that great. Except, for the final part. Noah’s side story is an interesting look into Noah and Crys. What makes this side story so interesting is at least to me very interesting in how it approaches the fact that Crys became a moebius. What I find the most fascinating however is his disconnect from Moebius as a whole. Whereas most did it to venge on those who harmed them or to simply enjoy their new lease on life to the fullest, Crys choose to reincarnate because he wanted to meet Noah once again. And I love how in a sense Crys is just testing Noah to see if he’s right in his points. Or at least to hear his song once more. And I feel that that is interesting, especially with the implications that he’s so miserable in the cycle that he chooses to commit suicide either through self harm or by cop. Which is just wow. This is pretty interesting stuff.

And now the other side stories which I completed around this point of time. Taion’s side story is pretty good in how it follows up to the earlier mentions of Isurd wanting Taion to bury the watch of Nimue there. I also like how this shows how like colony Tau there can be nontraditional colonies even though this one’s only nontraditional due to the defunct flame clock. I also like how he uses his tactics to beat the moebius and I think that his choice not to reveal Nimue that he knew her at this point. Overall, a great side story.

And now we get to side story Sena Ghondor, sorry that was not a funny joke. But yeah, Sena’s side story is one of the shorter ones and one of the darkest I feel like in how it fully deals with the character of Shania her becoming S and the trauma that led to her becoming S. I think that Shania’s character truly is intriguing. Especially in how the emotional abuse committed by her mother leads to her breaking down and eventually betraying the city. I think that Shania truly is a fascinating character and I’m sad for her that she never really had anything that gave her even the remote possibility of a good upbringing, with a mother who’s like the nightmare tiger mom, Ghondor not having the best tact in trying to encourage her, and the fact that she gets brought back as a Moebius. This last part is truly depressing to me. The fact that Shania who joined the side of Moebius in order to have a chance to enter the eternal now as a soldier, to be able to have multiple shots at life, to be free from the shackles of expectation, becomes a creature imprisoned by even stricter constraints than her old life. I lowkey feel like her choice to assault the city was not one made to appease her new master Z, but one made because she knew that it would fail. What I’m implying here is then is that like multiple other characters in the story I feel like this is Shania attempting suicide by cop. And she succeeds. It also adds another point to my “the city is actually not such a great place” agenda which I will discuss later. Ultimately every single one of the side stories is interesting and fun in how it further explores the messed-up corners of the hellscape that calls itself Aionios.

The assault on Origin feels like, at least to me, a way better worked out version of what the assault on the life hold could have been, except in this case it is to destroy a place instead of defending it. But yeah, Origin is in a sense an even more over the top version of the Lifehold core. The aesthetic of the area the length, making it feel like a true journey to reach the core, and THE MUSIC. All combine to make origin at least to me the best final dungeon in this entire series. I will not elaborate on this further because I feel like I’ve already made my point as to why I feel this way.

The showdown with N in the prison of eternity is amazing. The removal of his Moebius title, the fact that one of the most beautiful battle themes is playing during this fight, the sheer beauty of Harry McEntire’s voice acting here and just wow. I fucking love this fight so much. The sheer beauty of it is just amazing. Really a shame that the chain attack theme interrupts it. Really wish we would’ve gotten that toggle, oh well.

The battles with X and Y are just there, I find it weird how you can just walk away from their dissolving corpses. They should’ve at least had a cutscene commemorating their defeat and death, or were they too inconsequential to receive one despite this being their final outing? I do not get it, these are the choices that befuddle me Monolith soft.

And now at the end I’m going to give some of my thoughts on Z and moebius. Maybe a hot take but Z is a great antagonist and the fact that they lack any depth and are uninteresting and shallow with their motivation and how they interact feels at least to me like a stroke of genius. Because they are not human, they do not have any motivations, they are just a blob of emotion, and what destroys them is not killing them but rather two moebius, two of his victims, creatures that are made as the fear of the unknown future manifest, choose to accept the unknown future and the unpredictability that it brings. And to be frank I love this. And just moebius in general what others may see as complaints I feel like are choices that have been made intentionally to showcase the sole facts of their existence. They are cruel, they only want to have fun, and they enjoy the fleeting pleasure of pursuing their ephemeral fun.  Not planning for what comes ahead, just eternally living in the moment, unsustainably pursuing the pleasure of ending lives and the joy that comes with snuffing out flames. And that makes them, at least to me, just terrifying, at least when you think about it a bit. They are a group of man children who have been given near omnipotent powers by their demiurge leader, and all they do with it is torture and play with those they once may have considered as friends. Or to put it shortly “Absolute power corrupts Absolutely.” Also, as an aside I think that thematically they are a better demiurge than Zanza, might elaborate on this later down the line if I ever feel like it.

And now we get to the final battle. And in my opinion one of the most spectacular final bosses that this entire series has seen up until now. While yes alpha has an amazing fight, Lao Chimera is a brilliant horrifying design, Zanza, is iconic and the final duel with Malos at the end of Torna is just amazing with how it recontextualizes the chain attack mechanic. I do have to say that I prefer the showdown with Z. Their entire presence in the game Is just exquisite and amazing and I love how they don’t go down like a chump. Their fight is comparable to the final boss of p3 and like that boss I love it for how long it is. Because it makes achieving victory feel like a true test of both your skills and endurance while it also makes the fight more memorable. I love that when they are beaten in the first phase, they just become this abstract face and mess of emotions because that is cool and an interesting way to showcase their personification of fear, how they change their face to reflect facets of the protagonists, I love this fight. I, however, do agree that it is complete bullshit and that it is annoying that they can just one-shot you at certain times. Due to time constraints related to me writing this piece I eventually just used the bonus Exp I had accrued to boost myself by 10 levels and just gank them just to get done on time. It wasn’t that easy, but it still really alleviated the stress of the fight.

But that was Z the Omega to Alpha’s, uhm well Alpha. The end to this trilogy. And wow. I’m going to be frank here when I rewatched this entire ending section for the first time in a year just a few days ago I was just shocked at rewatching this beautiful piece. I love how Noah throws away lucky 7 figuratively declaring his intentions to never fight again, I love the reveal of that one picture, I cried when I saw Poppi emerge from the ether furnace, I feel like that was an ether furnace, and the beauty of where we belong. Which like many other things in this game is I feel like the best version in the entire series, in this case being the ending credits songs. Its just so hauntingly sad while also being so fucking heartwarming so filled with hope and so filled with sadness. I don’t have any words to fully describe the beauty of this ending. I just love it. God, I love this game.

And then the post credits scene comes along. Which is a great return to, and continuation of, the first cutscene and then the first hint that all will be alright. Which FR will eventually confirm. But that is not something we will discuss today. However now we will continue to.

Chapter EX: assorted thoughts.

As I’ve hopefully already made clear in this piece, I really fucking love this game. I have a few issues, but I still feel like it is one of the best experiences I’ve ever had while playing a game. I do also have a final headcanon and some small insights to make which I here now wish to share.

First off you may have noticed that I have avoided saying certain things relating to Z namely I feel like Z has no gender, which is due to a certain hypothesis I have let me explain. First off X Y and Z feel like mirrors to the trinity processor units. The idea here is that because Z was the first, they based themselves on data they could find and what was the architecture of origin based around: The Ontos core. Ontos was meant as the balance between Pneuma and Logos, therefore Ontos has no gender, thus I feel like if Z did indeed base themselves on Ontos that they would also not have any possible gender. Then in that same sense X and Y could be based on the idea that Ontos was meant as a mediator between Pneuma and Logos and thus they created X and Y two moebius that while not acting as the balance to, do feel like polar opposites, one seeming to be a young girl who enjoys fighting, the other being an older man who talks in almost Miltonian cadence and style. There’s also what the TV tropes page puts on their page which could, at least in my opinion, strengthen these parallels between the trinity processor and the true moebius, which I will quote here.

“Suspiciously Similar Substitute: The original three Moebius, being born from Origin itself, share similarities to the three Cores forming the Trinity Processor that powers the Conduit:

X is one to Pneuma, a.k.a. Mythra. The two of them have the personalities of Bratty Teenage Daughters, serve as a foil towards whoever they're working alongside, be it Rex or Shania, and of their trios, the two perform the most direct work in the frontlines, whereas the rest of their trio take more of a backseat.

Y is one to Logos, a.k.a. Malos. Both are incredibly hammy villains, rely on technology to get their jobs done for them, and cause the most direct damage to their respective worlds of Alrest and Aionios, especially when compared to the people they directly work for.

Z is one to Ontos, a.k.a. Alvis. Although Z isn't actually a god like Alvis is, they were both the central Cores of the devices that created them, have absolute control over their worlds without anyone but their closest subordinates realizing it, and often get people to work for them simply by having conversations with them.”

And now for some overall points about the game.

This game has some of the best combat in the series, only being surpassed by Future Redeemed which is also amazing but I also feel like simplifies the combat too much, I do prefer the bond points system to the soul points or level based unlocks of the main game.

This game’s Ost is just amazing. I have many songs I really enjoy but I feel like every song with the moebius leitmotif, not counting the moebius battle themes because those are on another level entirely, almost automatically becomes one of my favorites due to how creatively and just great each variation is. If I had to rank my 5* (*way more than 5) favorite songs they would prolly be 1: moebius battle (all variations) 2: all songs containing the Moebius leitmotif, 3: carrying the weight of life, 4: the false queens, and 5: Kevesi battle.

The eclipse homecoming is one of the most well executed scenes of pure fucking despair I’ve ever seen in a game.

The art style and world are just amazing, and it truly feels large, in a sense even larger than X at least to me, that game feels kind of small after obtaining a Skell.

The challenge mode is ok and while I haven’t played too much of the gauntlet mode, I do feel like it could be pretty fun.

Also, as a final aside I like the detail of filth and grime buildup on clothes which can both be erased through washing your clothes and through swimming in water, but I also like that certain regions have higher buildup of dust and resin and such. This is way too detailed for a game like this and I love it, I mean by this that this is an amount of detail that you normally don’t see in JRPGs.

And I feel like that’s all there is to say about Xenoblade 3, within the constraints of having written this in 3 days due to my own issues with managing my time and having to compromise on my original vision in which I would have attempted a 100% playthrough. But yeah, I hope that if you did read this entire almost 12000 words long piece you at least enjoyed it. This is the first time I’ve actually written such a piece, and also the longest piece I’ve ever written, and the first time I’m posting something on this platform. But I hope that you’ve enjoyed reading this. Also, if I’m allowed a minor bit of shameless self promotion, I’ve also uploaded a fanfic today to celebrate the 1 year anniversary of the game which you can find here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/48958873. You don’t have to read it, but you could. Anyways thank you for reading and have a wonderful day.

[idiocyonaplate]

My thoughts on The Ssum about a week into playing it:

(This will probably be kinda long and a big mess, lol. Prepare for word vomit. Slight spoilers until day 8!!)

I’ll be completely honest right off the bat; I’m having quite a bit of trouble staying engaged. My 2 friends who are also playing are having a similar experience so if anyone is having a splendid time I’d love to hear about it (no spoilers tho, please!)!

(Also disclaimer, I will be comparing TS to MysMe here and there but bare with me please.)

To start off, is it just me or is there a higher paywall than before?? I can’t believe I’m not allowed to see certain images unless I use batteries! That feels a little ridiculous, no? You start off with barely any batteries and they go by so fast.

Then you go to look at the prices, and it’s just about 3 dollars for 30– compared to 99c for 30 hourglasses in Mystic it feels like a pretty big leap. And then the “private account”???? What is that? 64 cents a DAY? That’s almost 20 dollars a month and for what? “Unlimited calls, battery answers and image download.” WHY IS DOWNLOADING IMAGES BEHIND A PAYWALL??? In Mystic you make a single purchase of $25 and you get like 5000 calls per person. Why is there a daily fee for this instead of a one time purchase?

Speaking of “special replies” that you use batteries for— I’m not loving that some of the decent replies you can make cost batteries. One of the best features about Mystic is the freedom of choice. They don’t lead you to a response, you get to pick for yourself and make your own decisions. I will say, it does seem that batteries don’t always lead you to the “good” answer, but it just feels like a ploy to get you to use more batteries lol. There’s also 2 billion pop ups and often an ad for in game purchases that you can’t skip for 5 seconds? This isn’t a video, it’s a game, why are you giving me an ad I can’t skip for a game I’m already playing? And it’s not like only when you open the app, it’s like every other action.

The Story:

What… is the story? I’m so confused, lol. Again, I will say I’m having a lot of trouble staying engaged so I haven’t been as thorough as I could be being BUT— I did not have trouble staying engaged with Mystic, lol. Even replaying now, after all these years, I can play through Mystic eagerly and I look forward to the chat rooms. Did anyone else feel like they were just plunged into The Ssum without anything to back it up? I do want to add I was HYPED about TS, I’ve been waiting since like 2018 for the game and I can’t help but feel disappointed but I swear I went into this with a positive mindset.

Game starts, a bird tells you you’re going to fall in love, and then you start talking to this random ass guy who broke all his bones lol. I just feel like in Mystic, even though you’re thrown into the middle of a random and chaotic situation you’re immediately given context. You talk to a stranger > Go to a random house > Get into a chatroom with 5 strangers > They all introduce themselves and what they want you to achieve in the RFA > You wait for the next chatroom.

Maybe I’m just stupid but I have no clue why we’re supposed to be so engaged with this game. WHAT IS THE POINT OF THE EMOTIONS? WHY ARE WE STUDYING THEM? Who is our character? Why do they stay engaged in the chats? I don’t understand the whole space part of the game—and yes I know I’m only 7-8 days into the game— but I just feel like we’re not given enough context??? You get all these emotions and you can study 3 at once OR pay SEVEN DOLLARS for a fourth? What does incubating the emotions even do???

The way I see the ��emotions” you gain is like the hearts in Mystic, and in Mystic you can convert hearts to hourglasses since you get so many of them. However in TS, you can crunch batteries for more emotions? Why? How would that feel worth it when the only way to get a decent amount of batteries is by paying for them?

Teo:

Teo. Is. So. Boring.

I’m sorry but don’t get me wrong! I love him! He’s adorable and his voice is very cute. But like… what is there to him? He wants to produce films and likes that sort of thing but with all the talk of his hospitalization did he ever even say what the film he was in was about? I get so bored in our conversations. And he takes so long to type for what??? 😭 In Mystic, even without having Max Speed, you can speed up the chat to 9x but in TS you can skip forward using— you guessed it— batteries. Albeit it’s only 1 battery per minute, but again, you barely get any batteries to begin with so it’d add up quick if you chose to use that option.

I understand that there’s like 200 freaking days of content lol, but I’m not feeling motivated to stick around for it. 8 days in and NOTHING interesting has happened except for the fact that he’s leaving the hospital. Yay? Now what? Is the plot finally gonna happen once he’s out?

I get the feeling that they want this to feel more natural and like you’re talking to a real person, but at the end of the day this is a game and I need some plot, lol. The little bit of activity I get with the emotions doesn’t do much for me considering I don’t even really understand what they’re for, unlike the emails in Mystic which are for the party.

Finishing thoughts:

At the end of the day, The Ssum isn’t like horrible. It’s just boring so far, and the paywall is a little ridiculous. I’m gonna stick with it and hope things get interesting but I’d love to hear other people’s thoughts! I know this was long and pretty much just me complaining but I’m honestly not enjoying it as much as I had hoped I would, lol. I love Cheritz and I still have high hopes for the future of TS but again, having a lot of trouble staying engaged. Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk. 🙇🏻💀

[troubatrain]

set it up - a. beauvillier

a/n: i started this idk 9000 years ago with three different hockey boys but i’ve never written for tito and this could be 6k words of absolute garbage but i think you guys will like it?? it was inspired when i watching the Netflix movie Set It Up, which I absolutely love because who doesn’t love a romcom. I wanna thank @nazdaddy​ for giving it a quick read like halfway through to hype me up you’re a real one!!

You felt sick.

Your feet hurt, your head was pounding and you were absolutely soaked. It started in the morning, waking up late for and having to sacrifice your morning coffee so your boss wouldn’t kill you. Then there was the workday from hell, skipping lunch to work on a project because your boss’s son had a brain the size of a raisin. By the time five rolled around, a storm had sweeped into New York, soaking the city streets on a day when you didn’t have an umbrella on hand. The subway packed, and by the time you’d gotten back to your apartment you were absolutely exhausted. You were looking forward to a night in, a glass of wine and ordering take out.

Then you were met with the sight of a pink scrunchie, sparkling against your door and stopping you dead in your tracks.

Rose was your best friend, and that was the sole reason why you haven’t murdered her yet. You’d lived with Rose since you were freshman in college, randomly paired up as roommates and you got lucky she turned out to be your friend. In all of those years, she’d been with the same guy who she met approximately four hours after you moved into your dorm. Cam was great, until one day he just wasn’t. Rose still didn’t know what happened, but after grieving the longest relationship she’d ever been in for months, she was finally ready to start dating again. Turns out, dating again, was going to ruin your life.

You furrow your eyebrows, rubbing your hand over your eyes and trying to remember if she mentioned having anyone over. You open your phone, remembering how you turned on do not disturb sometime after she sent you her tenth meme of the day while you were working your ass off.

Having Kyle over for dinner - among other things, can you stay out for a bit?

You lean your head back, letting out a small scream in frustration. You hear a laugh behind you, and you turn around to be met by your neighbor. Anthony Beauvillier was an okay neighbor. He was quiet, usually giving you some sort of heads up that he’d been having a party which was rare. You knew he was gone most of the time because of hockey, but you never cared to ask any questions further than that. One thing you did notice about your neighbor, was just how handsome he looked in a suit on the rare occasion you caught him in the elevator.

“You okay?” Anthony asks, turning his head to the side, “Are you locked out?”

“No,” You sigh, debating whether or not you really needed to drop this on him, “Rose has a friend over, and I missed her text to tell me to stay out.”

“But you’re soaked,” Anthony points out, pointing to the water that was dripping off of you, “Come by me.”

“Oh you don’t have to do that, I’ll just-” You start to decline his invite, but his eyes were kind while they were staring at you, an amused smile on his face.

“C’mon Y/N, I’ll get you some dry clothes,” Anthony smiles, opening up his apartment door and insisting you came in, “And I’m not going to cook all of this for myself.”

Anthony holds up the grocery bags in his hand, soft eyes and a smile to match staring back at you. You nod, taking the invitation inside because it beat sloshing around in your heels, “Thanks Anthony.”

“You can call me Beau if you want,” Anthony shrugs, pointing down the hallway of the apartment that was identical to yours, “My rooms down there take whatever you want.”

Anthony moves around his kitchen, his mind wandering about why he felt compelled to invite her neighbor inside. Really he felt bad, you looked like you were having an awful day and getting sexiled from your own apartment probably would have been enough to break you. Anthony was tired too, his body was sore from a rough practice earlier that day. Not to mention the team was on a five game losing streak and while Anthony knew he could be doing more himself, he knew Mat wasn’t playing up to usual standards either.

Mat was a mess, and it was starting to drive Anthony absolutely crazy. He thought he was in love, a random girl he followed on Instagram who he took out a few times. Mat thought it was something, turns out she thought it was something casual. Now, his usual cocky and charismatic best friend was just a sad shell of himself. Selfishly, Anthony wanted him to get over it because if he did then they’d probably win a few more games and Trotz wouldn’t have them skate until someone threw up.

Then it hit him, the second you walked back into the kitchen with his clothes hanging off your frame while you pulled your hair back an idea came to Anthony’s head. If you wanted peace and quiet, he could give it to you, “Does Rose do this a lot?”

“Lately,” You sigh, sitting at the barstool next to the island, “Her boyfriend broke up with and after she cried for a few months she decided to be single and that’s ruining my life.”

“What if I could help?” Anthony asks, raising his eyebrows at you.

“You don’t need to let me into your place because Rose is-” You go to tell him no - whatever idea he had couldn’t be a fix all solution for your current problem.

“My teammate Mat, he’s single, and honestly sad, but he does have his own place where Rose can spend all her time…” Anthony suggests, dragging out his last words to give you a minute to think.

“What if they don’t even like each other?” You ask, stating what you thought should be the obvious.

“We’ll just set them up on a few dates, I’ll give Mat advice that you give me and it’ll all work out,” Anthony argues back, “We’re in complete control here.”

“But then it’s not real,” You remind him, that if you told Mat exactly how to date Rose it wouldn’t be Mat dating Rose at all.

“Does it matter?” Anthony asks, “You get a quiet apartment and my team gets a few wins, “What's the harm?”

“The harm is our friend's feelings,” You say, your hands in the air while you continued to talk. You were stopped by a ding on your phone, a text from Rose giving you a fair warning that her friend was staying over. You roll your eyes, “You know what - fine.”

“Really? You’re in?”

“Don’t make me regret this.”

***

You didn’t know why Anthony had you meeting him at the coffee shop just a few blocks away from your building, but judging by the all black outfit he was sporting, something told you that it was because he was taking this set up thing too seriously.

“Are we spies now?” You ask, slipping into the chair and crossing your arms, “Because if we are you aren’t doing a very good job.”

“I’m not doing a good job? You’re wearing yellow,” Anthony says, “You could not be any more obvious.”

“Whatever, when’s Mat going to get here?” You ask, grabbing the coffee Anthony had waiting for you.

The plan was simple, Anthony knew that Mat knew who Rose was to some capacity, because Mat had told his friend on more than one occasion about how hot his neighbors were. So, you were both going to force them to actually speak to each other. Anthony suggested just telling them that you were setting them up on a date, but you insisted that if this was going to work they would have to think this happened without the will of the two of you. So you both invited them to the same place, and after you both conveniently miss your plans they would have to run into eachother.

“He should be here soon, I tipped the barista $40 to mix up their coffees and let us watch from their kitchen,” Anthony explains, holding up to his end of the plan, “Which by the way, was way more than I think they would have taken.”

“Oh I’m sure you’ll be okay,” You roll your eyes, reminding him that you were living with Rose to keep your rent down while Anthony could live alone comfortably, “Shit, I see them.”

You both got up, sneaking into the back where the barista who was working just shook her head at the two of you. You peek out, watching the scene unfold in front of you. Anthony wraps his arm around your chest, pulling you back into him, “I swear if you get caught.”

You try to push the thought about how good Anthony smelled, or how nice his arm felt around you while you tried to focus on Rose who just grabbed Mat’s coffee by accident. Mat tells her it’s his, a joke about how familiar she looked following shortly after. Their conversation was brief, and for a minute you thought maybe it wasn’t going to work. Then you saw Mat slip his phone out of his pocket, holding it out for Rose to take.

“Oh my god, it’s working,” You exclaim, Anthony’s hand flying over your mouth immediately. He mumbled something in French, and there was no way you were going to be able to make it out. Anthony’s phone dings, and he pulls it out to show a text from Mat sent promptly after Rose was out of the cafe.

I think I just asked your neighbor out.

Anthony was beaming, pulling his hand off your mouth while you both watched Mat leave the shop, “This date needs to be perfect.”

“It will be as long as you listen to me,” You say, turning around to cross your arms at him, “Because if this is going to work-”

“You almost blew our cover, I’m in charge here,” Anthony scoffs, “You’re like the worst sidekick in the world.”

“You’re the sidekick here.”

“No it’s you, you’re Robin and I’m Batman.”

***

“Here?”

“No.”

“How about this one?”

“God, no she hates seafood.”

You’d been trying to figure out where you were going to set up Mat and Rose’s first date for hours. Every restaurant Anthony mentioned just wasn’t enough, and Mat was dying for some help from his friend. Anthony was frustrated, mostly with you for not just choosing something and calling it a day.

“This is why you’re single, by the way, because these places are just meh,” You argue, pulling his laptop from his hands, “Where’s the romance?”

“I’ll have you know I’m very romantic,” Anthony scoffs, not having any of your shit, “Ask any girl I’ve ever dated.”

“Seems like they’re all gone, wonder why,” You hum, scrolling through the Google search.

“Fine, how about this? He takes her to a show because you said she loves musicals,” Anthony suggests, pulling the laptop from your hands, “After Mat sets up a dinner by his place because he’s got a sick rooftop and if all goes to plan Rose will be there all night.”

You whip your head around to look at the man next to you, a grin on his face because he very well may have nailed it when it came to a first date. It was simple, yet fancy enough to keep Rose interested, “That just might work.”

You kept your mouth closed about why keeping Rose out all night was going to work for you. You had a date with someone you matched with on Hinge who seemed nice enough and the opportunity to take him home at the end of the night didn’t seem like a bad move. You didn’t want to let that information slip to Anthony, and you didn’t know why. You didn’t like him, and you were pretty positive he was only putting up with you because you were both trying to set Mat and Rose up.

“It’s a date then?” Anthony asks, pulling out his phone to give Mat all the details about the date he should be taking his neighbor on. Anthony made it clear to Mat he’d know, despite the fact that before the other night Anthony hadn’t had so much as a conversation with Rose or yourself. However, he had you and you knew Rose better than anyone.

***

You sat across from your date, twirling the glass of wine in your hand while he talked about his family. Ben was nice, and honestly you were enjoying his company. The restaurant was almost perfect, because knowing it made your rejection list for Mat and Rose’s first date location wasn’t something you could shake. Ben had to be oblivious to it, a delighted smile on his face from across you. Your phone rang on the table, and Anthony’s number popped up for the third time that evening. You knew Rose and Mat were well into their date at this point, and you had the night planned so perfectly nothing could possibly go wrong.

“You can take that if you need to,” Ben suggests, a gentle tone to his voice. You nod, feeling a little bad for stepping away from your conversation to answer the call.

“I’m on a date,” You grit out the second you were out of Ben’s earshot, “Someone better be dead Beau.”

“We’re about to be,” Anthony huffs out, “The chef Mat hired canceled and I have all of these ingredients and I know how to cook three things and they aren’t steak.”

“Beau,” You whisper harshly, “Figure. It. Out.”

“Absolutely not, if this tanks you’re coming down with me,” Anthony begs, “Please come to Mat’s and help me.”

So you did. You loved Rose too much to let this blow up in your face because of Anthony’s inability to cook a meal. Ben was understanding, accepting the excuse that you weren’t feeling well and even offering to pay for your cab back home. You declined, because you didn’t have the heart to tell him you had to bail out Anthony.

By the time you finally got to Mat’s, you could hear a string of curses on the other side of the door and the smell of something burning. You walked in and a pan was practically on fire while Anthony turned around frantically.

“Oh my god, move,” You demand, grabbing the pan and turning down the stove, “You really can’t cook anything?”

Anthony was dumbfounded, standing in Mat’s kitchen letting his eyes wander down your bare legs. You looked good and if you weren’t about to chew him out Anthony might have said something. But you were standing in front of him, arms crossed while you waited for him to say something. When he didn’t you sighed, pushing him out of the way and getting to work.

“Make yourself useful and set the damn table,” You demand, pointing a spatula in his direction. This dinner had to be perfect if this was going to work. You relished in the silence, getting to work on the dinner that you were left to save.

“So how was your date?” You hear Anthony’s voice float back into the apartment, and you turn around to give him a dirty look, “Or did I ruin that?”

“You didn’t totally ruin it, Ben was nice,” You shrug, not really wanting to get into it. The thing was, Ben was nice and that seemed to be a rare thing to find. Sure, you could have done without the boring work talk, but it was better than some of the other dates you’d been on lately.

“Hm, just nice?” Anthony stifles a a laugh, closing his mouth immediately when your eyes narrowed at him, “Sorry. I’ll leave probably boring but nice Ben alone.”

“I used to think you were nice, you know?” You snark back, plating the dinner just as Mat slipped in to grab the food.

“Dude you’re a lifesaver,” Mat immediately thanks Anthony and you had to roll your eyes at the sigh, “Wait aren’t you-”

“Rose’s roommate, uh yeah, she cooks all the time so I called her,” Anthony rushes to explain, the idea that Mat would recognize you going right over his head in a panic.

“Well, thanks you guys really saved my ass,” Mat says, grabbing two plates and heading up to the roof where you knew Rose was probably checking her teeth in nervous panic. 

It took forever to clean up the kitchen, Anthony’s sad initial attempt to cook was disastrous. You probably didn’t help, and by the time you were done cooking you had used every pan in Mat’s apartment. You could hear Rose’s voice in the hall and you both looked at each other in a panic. Anthony grabbed your hand, pulling you into the nearest closet to the kitchen.

“Quiet,” Anthony whispers, your mind far too distracted by your head pressed against his chest to care about just how small this closet was. You were trying to steady your own breathing, the closet was small and when Anthony took up most of the space you could feel a bit of anxiety creeping in. You wrap your arms around his waist, your fingers digging into his sides to grab a hold of quite literally anything. Anthony can feel it, how nervous you were so he took a chance and carded his fingers through your hair in an attempt to calm you down just a little bit, “Just wait until they’re in his room and I’ll take us home I promise.”

You nodded against his chest, closing your eyes and just letting Anthony provide you with any comfort he was willing to give. He was a bit snarky and definitely a little too bossy but he was the best you were going to get for the moment. You hear a door click and with Rose’s giggle on the other side you knew you were in the clear.

“So you really went through all of this just for a few wins?” You break the silence in Anthony’s car, looking out the window while he drove you both home.

“I mean, yeah, when Mat plays his best so do the rest of us,” Anthony shrugs, “Don’t tell me I could be playing better, I’ve heard it enough.”

“I wasn’t going to,” You defend, your voice small, “Do you think we could get them away for a night next weekend?”

“Hot date? Boring Ben doesn’t seem like he’d sleep over until the third date,” Anthony jokes, tapping you on the thigh.

“Sort of, I have my boss’s birthday party and I just want him to hate me less,” You admit, plus the office gossip always seemed to revolve around the fact that you never brought a date anywhere.

“I think you’re impossible to hate, trust me I’ve been trying.”

“You’re an ass.”

“Do you want my help or not?”

***

Everything was going wrong, like very wrong. The bigger plan was actually going the way it was supposed to, Rose and Mat were off to an Airbnb in the Hamptons for a night that Anthony just happened to mention to Mat during practice the day after you cooked them that dinner. That, however, was the only thing going well for you. You were dressed up, the black dress you were wearing looked absolutely killer on you. Your leg was poking out of the slit that was appropriate for a work event and the date you were supposed to be on, but your date was nowhere to be seen. Turns out Boring Ben wasn’t boring at all, or he was just a total douche and you never realized. Regardless, you were dateless yet again, and you had to admit it was a bit of an ego killer too. You thought about not going, but after telling a few of your coworkers that not only were you going, you were bringing a date.

You take a deep breath, bracing yourself for the passive aggressive comments from the newlyweds who seemed to litter your office. You had ten wedding invitations last summer from your coworkers alone, and now you had to show up dateless for what felt like the millionth time in your life.

“Woah,” You hear Anthony’s voice as soon as the elevator opened, a low whistle escaping from his lips until he realized you were without your date, “Where’s that Ben dude?”

“He didn’t show if you really need to know,” You complain and Anthony could feel his heart break just a little.

Anthony sighs, taking a look at his watch and then back at you. You looked hurt, despite the smile plastered on your face that he could see right through. He was going to have a night in, maybe even invite over the girl he’d been hooking up with but in his heart he knew what the right thing to do was, “Give me five minutes to change?”

“No Beau you really don’t have to come, I got stood up, it's on me,” You rush out, stopping Anthony dead in his tracks.

“It’s not your fault that dude was an asshole,” Anthony scoffs, “And you look too good to not have a date.”

Anthony didn’t say another word, unlocking the door to his place and coming back out less than five minutes later in a freshly pressed suit, “No tie okay?”

“No tie is fine,” You squeaked out, watching Anthony fix the cuffs of his shirt. Everyone thinks a man putting on a suit is hot right? It wasn’t just that he looked damn good in it, “You can still back out.”

Anthony didn’t back out, in fact, he was a better date than you thought he could be. He was being a good sport, especially when you came to the realization your boss was a huge Islanders fan. He had Anthony by his side all night, no doubt pestering him about the season. You felt awful, and while Anthony had a smile on his face you couldn’t help but feel guilty for putting him in the situation in the first place.

“I met that boyfriend of yours,” Your coworker Stella says, nudging you with her elbow, “He seems like a keeper.”

“Oh he’s-” You went to deny any indication that Anthony was your boyfriend but you knew Stella better than that, and just like she did at everyone Monday morning team meeting, she was interrupting you before you had a chance to finish your sentence.

“And don’t even tell me it’s not serious he couldn’t stop talking about you,” Stella grabs your arm, and you raise your eyebrows and look at Anthony. He catches your eye, sending you a wink while he goes back to listening to whatever your boss was rambling about, “See? So cute.”

The night was going smoothly, and by the time dinner rolled around you were done for the night. One too many glasses of wine had your head resting on Anthony’s shoulder while your boss's wife made a toast. His hand was resting on the exposed skin on your thigh and if you weren’t convinced you were overthinking it - you may have thought Anthony was putting in a little more effort.

“I’m sorry my boss was chewing your ear off,” You whisper, catching Anthony’s attention, “I don’t want you to think I brought you because you’re you and he likes your team.”

“I don’t think that,” Anthony assures you, his lips just inches away from kissing on the forehead, “And he doesn’t hate you, he told me liked you.”

“He likes you, seems like everyone does,” You muse, after having gotten compliments all night about what a joy your boyfriend was you were sure Anthony was a better date than he was an actual companion.

“Better date than Ben?” Anthony asks, and you nod with a grin on your face.

Anthony wasn’t sure what he was doing or why. In the short time since he invited you into his place he only learned how annoying you can be, but he’d be a liar if he didn’t think it was cute. It was cute that you thought Mat and Rose could actually fall in love. It was cute that you never kept quiet when you were both sneaking around because something got you excited. And it was downright adorable to watch you laugh at your boss’s wife who was teasing her husband in her speech. He liked you, and he never thought about it until he saw the heartbroken look on your face when you told him your date stood you up.

“Ready to go home?” Anthony whispers, your eyes were getting heavier from the wine, and he wasn’t sure how much longer you would hold up until you fell asleep on his shoulder. Not that Anthony would have minded at all, he might even have preferred it.

By the time you’d gotten back to your apartment building, you made it clear why you limited yourself on wine at events. Anthony kept refilling your glass before you had a chance to stop him, and now he was practically chasing you down the hall because you insisted on running away for no reason at all.

“For a professional athlete you’re pretty slow,” You poke Anthony in the chest, who was currently fishing through your purse for your set of keys. He finally finds them turning them into the lock and opening the door, “Beauuuu.”

“Yes?” Anthony asks, grabbing your waist while you tripped over your heels.

“Do you think Mat really likes Rose?” You ask, the question wasn’t really for Anthony at all. It was coming from a guilty feeling that had been stewing inside of you for a few days. Rose seemed smitten, and a part of you knew a lot of those dates were just planned by you.

“He does, it’ll all work out,” Anthony assures you, because the frown on your face told him that if he didn’t he was about to have a crying Y/N on his hands and he didn’t want to be the one to make you cry.

“Promise?” You ask, finally slipping off your heels and leaning against the doorframe. You wanted him to stay, use the age old it’s late excuse for a few more hours where he was close to you. His apartment was across the hall, and asking him to stay would be silly. You watched him head out the door, turning around to give you one more look and answer your question.

“Yeah I promise.”

***

This entire thing had gotten out of hand, and Rose and Mat’s relationship was becoming a chore. You had stopped them from killing each other twice in the past week, texting Anthony almost exact directions on how Mat was going to fix whatever stupid he said. Mat didn’t know, or maybe he did and he didn’t care to say anything about how with your help his relationship with Rose would be over before it started. Now, you were hiking across the city for flowers so Mat could apologize to Rose for forgetting her mother’s name as if she didn’t talk about her family constantly. You finally got them to Mat’s wiping a bead of sweat off your forehead when a text came that rocked your world.

I think I love Mat, he literally had these delivered after I got mad at him.

Attached was a picture of the flowers, and a guilty feeling churned in your stomach while you made your way back to your place. You stopped in the hallway, looking at Anthony’s door biting your lip and thinking about what the consequences of this all really was - and it was eating at you.

You were fucked, completely and utterly fucked. It seemed wrong, like everything in your best friend’s love life was a lie you created because it was. So you panicked, and snuck away to Anthony’s without a second thought. You knocked twice, a sleepy hockey player appearing on the other side. 

“Rose is in love with Mat,” You state, pushing Anthony into his own place and walking past him.

“Isn’t that what we wanted?” Anthony asks, watching you pace through his apartment.

“It’s not real, everything Mat knows about Rose is because you told him,” You explain, stopping in the middle of the room, “We planned their dates, we did everything, and when they realize they might not as much in common as they think Rose is going to be heartbroken and-”

“So, you got what you wanted? She’s always over there,” Anthony counters back, not mentioning the hot streak his teammate was on.

“You don’t see anything with this?” You ask, furrowing your eyebrows at the man you thought you knew in front of you, “That your friend is going to be with someone when their relationship is built on a lie.”

“You act like he’s going to marry her,” Anthony groans, not even realizing until after the words left his mouth about how awful that sounded. Your jaw had dropped, your eyes wide while you look at Anthony, “Wait Y/N-”

“I’m telling them the truth,” You say, a stoic robotic tone to your voice. You thought about telling Rose just minutes before you left your place, but you stopped yourself before you ratted out your friend. Now, it seemed like it didn’t matter. Anthony was going to be a selfish asshole regardless of what you did and you weren’t going to let that sham of a relationship continue, “I shouldn’t have listened to your stupid idea to begin with.”

***

You walked out of Anthony’s life after that, and in the week that’s passed since, he was miserable. He didn’t know what you told Rose, but he definitely heard the arguing you were having with her from across the hall. He knew he should have stepped in, but the way you looked at him when you left was the only reason he didn’t. You looked at him with such disdain, like the mere indication that he didn’t care about his own friend’s feelings were the most awful thing he could have done.

Maybe it was, either way the guilt was eating Anthony alive. He called, but you never picked up. He texted you, using some dumb excuse about needing to grab a package outside his door while he on a road trip but an answer never came. Hell, he even tried to email you. The only thing left to do was walk across the hall and knock on your door, if you were even still there.

“Dude you’re doing it again,” Mat says, tossing a chip at his teammate and catching Anthony’s attention, “Just go over there and apologize.”

“Did you apologize to Rose?” Anthony huffs, annoyed with Mat’s attempt at giving him any advice.

“I didn’t have to because this was your fault,” Mat explains, reminding Anthony of exactly what happened after you left his place. You told Rose everything, and after what Anthony heard as a nasty fight - Rose and Mat spilt up once they realize they actually had nothing in common, “And fuck you dude because I still apologized to Rose after that.”

“Fine, I’ll go over,” Anthony budges, stomping out of his own place and across the hall to yours. He knocked twice, hearing some shuffling on the other end. The door finally clicked open, and when Anthony was met with Rose’s face, his shoulders slumped.

“She’s not here,” Rose leans against the doorway, her arms crossed at Anthony, “We’re, uh, taking some time away from each other.”

“This wasn’t Y/N’s fault it was mine,” Anthony rushes to explain, the reality of ruining someone's friendship settling in.

“I know it was,” Rose assures him, because she’d forgiven you just three days after you told her the truth. That wasn’t enough for you to come home, because your own guilt was eating you alive, “She feels too bad, and she doesn’t want to see you.”

That was it, Rose’s words were enough to have reality really settle in. Anthony Beauvillier was a massive asshole, and the reason you weren’t back in your own apartment. He did that. He was going to have to live with that guilt. And he didn’t know how to fix it.

***

It had been a month.

You didn’t know why you knew exactly how many days it’s been since you stomped out of Anthony’s apartment and into your own to tell the truth. But, you did know that exactly thirty days prior that’s just what you did. You told Rose everything, from the stupid plan to your own stupid feelings that seemed to

cloud your judgement. She was upset, and she had every right to be. You knew that she could have kicked you out of the apartment and told you to fuck off, and she did. Three days later, a much calmer Rose was on the phone telling you everything was fine and you could come back home.

You didn’t want to, because you knew Anthony was across the hall living his life just the way he had been before you stepped into it. He was going to go out on dates with girls that weren’t you, and go off on road trips for games he needed to play. He could set Mat up with someone else if he really wanted to, but none of those things would ever involve you again. You packed your stuff, and moved into a new place after couch surfing by a few of your friend’s places.

“You’re depressed,” Rose kicks your leg from the other side of your new couch, a movie night to celebrate your new place was in full effect, “I told you I’m not mad about the Mat thing.”

“I know,” You sigh, staring at the glass of fruity pink wine Rose had brought over, “I just-”

“You miss him,” Rose muses, a knowing look on her face, “It was never about Mat and I, it was always using us as an excuse to see each other.”

“It was about you guys at first,” You defend, staring at the blonde across from you who was looking at you intensely.

“He came and looked for you, after a week,” Rose says, holding onto the tidbit of information she’d been saving for almost a month, “I think he wanted to apologize.”

“Well he didn’t so it doesn’t matter anymore,” You snap back, Rose melting back into the couch to avoid being the next stop on your rage tour. You didn’t want to care about Anthony or his stupid biceps again, but you never stopped thinking about him.

***

Anthony wasn’t doing much better, in fact, he was doing a whole lot worse. He felt like shit, he was playing like shit, and he seemed just like Mat was when he came up with that stupid plan. He tried to throw himself into hockey, push his body where it had never gone before because then he wouldn’t have to think about you. He wouldn’t have to think about how much of a romantic you were or how you helped with even if he didn’t deserve. Most importantly, he wouldn’t have to think about how heartbroken you looked when he told you he didn’t want to come clean because it didn’t matter.

Anthony was doing the same thing he’d been doing all month, stalking your social media profiles in an attempt to see if you were doing okay. He knew you moved, and if he wasn’t on the West Coast maybe he would have stopped you. A text from Mat came in, one that had him rolling his eyes.

My rooftop in twenty it’s an emergency.

***

What Anthony didn’t know was that the same text was sent from Rose’s phone to yours just a few minutes prior. You rushed over Mat’s, absolutely terrified about what you could have been walking into. Except, when you got up to the roof there was nothing. No Mat. No Rose. Just yourself and-

“Fuck,” Anthony whispers, opening the rooftop door to reveal you on the otherside. It was just you, standing there just as confused as he was by the cryptic text from his teammate, “Uh Mat texted me to come?”

A grin threatens to break out on your face, just as the gears were starting to shift in Anthony’s. You were being set up, of course not as well as you would have planned, but it was a set up nonetheless.

“You know what they’re doing right?” You ask, breaking the silence. Anthony just nods, running a hand over his face without saying a word, “I’m going to go-”

“No,” Anthony rushes out, grabbing your arm and intertwining his fingers with yours, “I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry? You made me cry for weeks and almost blew up my longest friendship and all you have to say is sorry?” You questioned him, waiting for Anthony to come up with something better than that.

“What do you want me to say? That I didn’t want to stop doing this because I didn’t want to stop hanging out with you?” Anthony exclaims, “Because that’s the truth. I was being a selfish asshole, and I know that I don’t deserve your forgiveness but I feel awful for what I did to you. I was so scared to come and apologize because you have every right to tell me to go fuck myself and never speak to me again. The problem is, I want to talk to you. I want to listen to you talk about why you were a hopeless romantic, and take you home after you drank too much at a work thing. I-”

Anthony couldn’t finish his rant, because you pressed your lips against his before he had the chance. His hands were on your face, pulling you as closely as he could because he needed this kiss to show you that he wanted you. You finally pulled away, breathless while Anthony’s hands snuck down to your waist. His forehead was against yours, your noses bumping together while he whispered his next words.

“We’re not telling Mat this worked.”

“Oh definitely not, no more set ups?”

“Unless it’s me setting up our first date, consider it a promise.”

[riacte]

MCC 9 Blue Bats is simultaneously overrated and underrated.

One thing that I find interesting is how the Blue Bats/ Lime Liches bias on the MCC subreddit appeared 3/4 months after MCC 9. It’s almost like after MCC went on hiatus, people start asking for POVs, people recommend Blue Bats, and suddenly everyone starts to realize how good they were. And the fun thing is that the Blue Bats didn’t even do anything. No reunion, no new analysis video popped up. The bias naturally happened. And to be fair, the OG Blue Bats/ Lime Liches fans have been around since Sep/ Nov, and they’ve always been fairly vocal, but now the bias suddenly comes out of nowhere.

The favouritism grows. Blue Bats is no longer just the special underdogs team for a small circle of fans. Blue Bats became Reddit’s new fav team following MCC 4 Purple. So people start hyping them up until some people admit Blue Bats wasn’t as good as a POV because it was overhyped, and people started voting for the Bats no matter what polls they were in. I’ve seen Blue Bats be rated better than several very strong teams, and it vexed me even as a mega Bats fan.

Because the point of the Bats is that they were (rightfully) underrated before MCC 9. They weren’t meant to be the strongest team. They were the underdogs.

MCC 9 Blue Bats is overrated because their performance is not the most technically impressive. Yes, they were good, but not THAT good. The subreddit said they had potential, but put them 6th only because there were better teams (I noticed this was the same reasoning Reddit had for MCC 13 Purple Penguins). Their raw PvP skills were nowhere near as good at the MCC 13 PvP teams. For team games, H is a good team leader, but I understand why people doubted the hermits (they hadn’t played competitively).

MCC 13 DB had more clutches and more excitement, so objectively, MCC 13 DB is the more “entertaining” reverse sweep. MCC 9 DB is slower paced, there was a back and forth between False and Green that went on for quiet a while. For the individual games (eg. TGTTOS, Parkour) even though the hermits improved a lot, Fruit and H were still ahead of them significantly. This is no one’s fault of course, everybody did their best. The Bats were doing decently (and tbh that’s enough to get them into DB), but their real breakthrough was Survival Games, which I think is NOT overrated. People like to use SG as an example of how the Bats got to DB unfairly, but the funny thing is, Blue Bats would only have HIGHER points with the new scoring. You literally can’t hate on the Bats for this. You just can’t.

Blue Bats POV is good, but there are more technically impressive POVs. Blue Bats POV is not exactly “mainstream entertainment”, since they don’t scream loudly or swear (which seems to common in current gaming content). False and Fruit are relatively quiet. And besides, if you watch the POV while knowing they’re going to win, it ruins the excitement and pure joy a little. Blue Bats OGs have long raved about how unexpected and amazing their win was, but if you’re a Bats newcomer, you know they’re gonna win. So I understand why people say Blue Bats is overrated.

BUT-

The whole point of the Blue Bats is that they’re not meant to be technically impressive. They’re not expected to win. They’re not a team of the best; they’re a ragtag team of a Dodgebolt loser, a speedrunner who skipped a MCC, and two non-PvPers who got ninth three times in a row. I’m pretty sure Scott wanted to nerf H, and that’s partially why he put him with the hermits.

You see, the backstory is essential for the Blue Bats experience. H lost MCC 8 despite his team getting first in coins. People were doubting Fruit after MCC 7. The hermits’ teams never got 5th place or above. I’m sure newcomers know this, but maybe they haven’t really felt it, and I don’t blame them one bit. That’s why the OG fans, who followed them before MCC 9, who watched their practice streams, were so freaking excited.

The Blue Bats were strong because they were strong together. This is best displayed in Survival Games. Not all four of them need to be superb in PvP or movement. Not all four of them need to have amazing technical skills. Yes, maybe H and Fruit did “carry” False and Ren as much as I hate that term, but the hermits pulled their own weight, and honestly? That’s more important than having four individually great people but with poor communication and tactics. Imagine having four great bowers but no one to loot chests. That team will fall apart. Maybe the Bats were lucky with SG. But I’m pretty sure with their chemistry and synergy, they’ll power through any team game.

One interesting thing about the How the Blue Bats Won MCC 9 video is that Frostbyte talked about the story, the interaction between the players rather than the technical skills of the players. In fact, Blue Bats were not very strong on paper compared to the other MCC 9 teams, and they kinda won through protagonist armour. The way their team is set up caused the hermits to depend on the other two, so they didn’t have a lot of arguments on tactics. Ren in particular was very eager to act as support, which he excelled in for SG and SOT under the leadership of H. Ren’s skills mattered, but what mattered more was his willingness to follow H.

That’s how the Blue Bats won. As cheesy as it is, it was through friendship and plot.

The story behind the Bats POV is what compels people to this day. They weren’t the strongest, nor were they objectively the most impressive POV. If you weren’t emotionally invested in them, you probably would just go “Oh cool. Survival Games domination. Neat.”

But they were a funky little team that vibed well together. They spectacularly won the game they most feared. Their POV is made dramatic by their fans, but in the end, it’s just four people having good time.

Sure, they’re currently overrated by Reddit. Even I think they’re a little overrated. But the MCC 9 Blue Bats are one of the most beloved MCC teams for good reason, and it’s not because they’re strong. It’s precisely because they weren’t the strongest, yet still somehow won.

[bbyboibinnie]

comfort zone

synopsis: all your life you’ve tried your best to maintain a regular routine and comfortable life. during your last year as a senior though, everything changed and suddenly you were pushed out of your comfort zone. pairing: bang chan x fem!reader genre: high school au, strangers to lovers, angst, fluff, romance, little cliche but you gotta have some cliche stories in your life sometimes warning: mild swears wc: 11.8k a/n: this has not yet been proofread so my apologies for any errors! hope you enjoy nonetheless!

The hand on the clock was ticking excruciatingly slow. You’d been eyeing it for the last 10 minutes, trying to count down the time before math would finally wrap up and you could speed your way towards the cafeteria before everyone else began to flood in. It’s been like this for the last three, ongoing four years. You and your small group of friends had managed to secure a table in freshman year and that had been the hang out spot every day during the forty minute lunch period, which was frankly way too short. On most days, you spent half of those forty minutes waiting in line for the overpriced food that was barely considered edible. 

Nonetheless, right as the bell rang you were already out your seat and past the door. Other students were scrambling into the cafeteria and you picked up the pace to reach the line. You were squished between the person in front and behind you and if it weren’t for the massive backpacks acting as barriers, you’d be disgusted by the close contact. 

“I was wondering what took you so long.” Seungmin noted as you reached the wooden bench. 

“I know, it took even longer than usual to get this plate of god-knows-what,” you poked at the crusty pile of what looked to be pasta on your plate. “Those idiots kept cutting and of course the principle who stood there didn’t bat an eyelash as it happened right under his nose.” 

Seungmin shook his head and popped open the bag of chips he got from the vending machine. “The joys of high school right?” 

“Thank gosh this is our last year here.” 

“Amen to that.” You clinked your juice box with his and munched on the mediocre pasta, joining in on the card game the others had started. 

“Oh I forgot, we have that rally thing today don’t we?” Your other friend—Lia—brought up. 

“What rally?” You put down a queen and relished in victory as the others reshuffled the deck. 

“The one for the football players or something right? We’ve been going to this school for the last three years and we don’t even know.” What Lia said was very true. Before you had started high school, your parents and basically every adult you talked to said to ‘make the most out of your high school years’ and ‘get the full experience.’ Frankly, you just had your head set on getting that diploma at this point because after a while, everything has just felt more draining and repetitive, including today’s rally. 

“I guess there will be less class time then.” You shrugged, reaching out to grab the cards and continue the next round.

———

“I don’t get it.” 

“Don’t get what?” Seungmin said, turning to face you. 

“Why football is so hyped at our school. I mean at other schools I get it because they actually win, but haven’t we just been losing all season?” The rally had been going on for over half an hour and another yawn escaped your lips. 

“Yeah, I’ve been to every game and the best we got was a tie. Anyways, there’s only a handful of games left before this season ends. You should come.” 

“And remind me why I should?” The two hosts of the rally were trying to hype the crowd up and you had to stifle laughter as the person in the mascot costume came out from behind the bleachers. Did they ever wash that costume? It must’ve reeked of sweat in that thing; yoed at the thought.

“Because you’ve never gone before? I know sports isn’t really your thing, or any after school activity for that matter, but it’s high school. You gotta experience it at least once.” Seungmin reasoned, pulling at your arm. 

“I mean, you said they’ve been losing. I’m not going to pay and spend like two hours watching our school lose for the nth time.” The person in the costume was making rounds around the field now, starting a wave with the crowd. 

“Okay, what if I pay for your ticket then?” 

“But those two hours of of precious time will be wasted—“

“They have snacks there. Popcorn, churros, corn dogs, and your favorite and mine—fried oreos.” Events always sounded more appealing when food was involved, but you were hesitant. “C’mon please y/n? For me?” Seungmin was doing those puppy eyes with the pout to your dismay. Out of all the years you’ve known him, you could never turn him down whenever he gave you that look. 

“Fine! But you’re paying for the food too.” 

“Deal.” 

————

Seungmin had arrived at your house at six thirty on the dot and you slipped on your shoes before shouting to your parents that you were leaving. When you had told them that you were going out, especially to attend the football game, they had been surprised then elated. Your parents were the kind that always tried to encourage you to get out of your comfort zone and enjoy new things, and considering you were a major homebody, this was a pretty big step out the bubble of comfort if you had to say so yourself.

“Wow I’m impressed, you even wore the school colors.” He said as you got in the car, eyeing your outfit. 

“I mean if I’m going, might as well go all out right?” You ended up wearing the school hoodie with a white pleated skirt, the best part were the streaks of eyeshadow—red and gold—you had on your cheeks (no face paint because you didn’t have any on hand). 

“Exactly, now let’s go, I want to be there early so we get good seats.” He stepped on the gas and you were on your way back to school, something you’d never thought you do after hours. 

“Y/n pick it up, I can see a spot in the front row but someone else is gonna to snatch it if you keep you with that snail pace.” He looked back at you from atop the stairs of the bleachers. 

“Well it’s not my fault you won’t help me carry all of this food!” You gave him an exasperated look as you tried to balance the drinks, snacks, and napkins all in your hand. 

“Listen, I bought it so you do the heavy lifting and labor alright? Now let’s go.” He pulled on your arm and the corn dog nearly slipped out your hand as you tried to keep up with Seungmin. 

You gave out an annoyed huff as you sat down, right in the front row just like how Seungmin wanted. The feeling of the cool metal bleacher sent a chill up your spine and the bitter autumn wind wasn't helping ease the cold. You were starting to regret wearing that skirt. 

“We’re here, happy? Now take your food before I eat it all myself.” You rolled your eyes and handed him his share of the food while he excitedly starred off towards the field. The players were warming up and the opponents were off to the side, huddled with their coach. 

You looked back at the people in the stands and the seats were packed. To be honest, you were just shocked that this many people showed up to watch even though the team had a losing streak. There were adults, schoolmates, little kids, and —someone even brought their dog. It seemed like everyone was eager for the game to start and although this wasn’t something you ever thought you’d do on a Friday night, you were one of the eagerly anticipating spectators in the stands too. 

From beside you, Seungmin kept looking around the field, as if he were looking for something. You were puzzled at this but didn’t bother questioning him because wow, the fried oreos were delicious. 

“Aye Chan!” Your friend shouted; he was sitting so close that it felt like he had screamed directly into your year. His loud voice managed to catch the attention of one of the players on the field as the boy with the number 97 on his jersey turned around and jogged towards where you and Seungmin were seated. 

“Seungmin, you made it today!” The boy reached out over the fence that separated the crowd from the field to greet Seungmin and you were both confused and surprised at the sight. Seungmin knew one of the football players? Not just one of them but the football player Chan? Team captain Chan? You were with Seungmin five days a week at school and it had never occurred to you that he knew anyone on the team, much less the captain.

“Why are you so surprised? I come to every game.” He was leaning on the fence as he talked to Chan. 

“Did you come alone again?” You tried not to eavesdrop but it was impossible when they were speaking directly in front of you. 

“Nah, I actually convinced a friend of mine to come with me today for once. Y/n!” He shouted your name which made you look up in shock while in the midst of stuffing your face with fried food. Seungmin shook his head and grimaced at the sight. “Sorry, she usually isn’t this uncollected.” 

You gave a slight wave towards the two and swiped the crumbs off your cheeks. This was so embarrassing, Seungmin was going to get an earful from you after this. 

“Nice to meet you!” Chan shouted, smiling at your direction. You nodded and awkwardly tried to return the smile before giving up and going back to all the fried goodness that the snack stand had to offer. 

They probably talked for another ten minutes before Chan jogged off to join his teammates and  Seungmin came back to his seat where you immediately proceeded to throw questions at him. 

“You know Bang Chan? How do you know him?” 

“Yes, I do know him and we’ve known each other fo—“

“I’ve been your friend for so long, how come I didn’t know you were friends with the captain of the football team?!” 

“Well, I do have other friends outside of our friendship grou—“

“Wait, I’m still your best friend though right?”

“Oh my god, y/n yes. We have been friends since elementary and nothing changes tha—“

“Seungmin, answer my questions!” 

“I’m trying but you keep cutting me off.” He said which shut you right up. “Anyways, yes I know Chan. His mom and my mom are super close so we just started hanging out when our parents were together, that’s why you never saw me with him at school. And you’re my best friend and will continue to hold that title. No football player is going to take that title away from you.” You smiled in relief at the last part. 

“Is that why you go to all their games?”

“Well yes, but I also genuinely enjoy the atmosphere of these events.” 

“Ahh, as expected from the extrovert himself. I’m truly amazed how we’re best friends.” This thought had come to your mind on numerous occasions. Seungmin had that happy-go-lucky type of personality, always smiling and being the social butterfly while you were on the quieter, more pessimistic end of the scale. If it weren’t for the fact that you guys were assigned seats next to each other in the third grade, you don’t know if you two would’ve ever crossed paths otherwise. You’d have to thank your third grade teacher someday for doing you a massive favor with that seating chart. 

“They say opposites attract y’know?” Seungmin threw an arm over your shoulder and annoyingly ruffled your hair—you felt like he was an older brother you never had sometimes. You swatted his hands away and tried to fix your hair. 

“Can you stop doing that? You know I actually tried putting effort into my hair today righ—“ 

“Y/n shut up, the game is about to begin.” He shushed you as the band began to play and you begrudgingly stopped talking.

After the dramatic applause and cheers died down, the teams got into position and soon enough the game had started. You had never actually seen a game before, only seeing snippets of them in television dramas or in books, so you didn’t understand the penalties or all the ins and outs. Regardless, you watched silently for the most part and clapped when others did. 

It was halftime and the scores were not looking so hot. You had finished your drinks and snacks long before and was starting to wish you’d stay home because this game was turning out to be another bust—-as you had expected. 

“Seungmin, I’m getting bored. I tried being optimistic and hoped for a win but we are down by so many points.” You pouted as you looked at the scoreboard—five to twelve. 

“Aw c’mon y/n, it’s only half way through. Anything could happen in the other half.” He made a good point but it was not making you have any more hope than before. “Hey, why don’t you try cheering for them in the next half? Maybe if we cheer louder and give them even more support, they’ll do better. I gotta say, your half hearted clapping is not very effective.” You playfully elbowed him in the stomach for that remark. 

“If you say so, but if I scream at the top of my lungs and they still end up losing, I’m never going to another one of these games.” 

————

The game had continued on after the short half time break and it seemed like your school was finally gaining points. It was neck and neck and everyone was on the edge of their seats by the time the last quarter of the game rolled around. 

You had been so enticed with the game that you didn’t realize how late it was getting. You had arrived at six thirty and it was almost reaching the two hour mark. The sun had completely set by now and the field was being illuminated by the massive lights and whatever little light the stars and the moon  in the sky were giving off. 

“Not going to lie, we are doing better than I had expected.” Seungmin commented during the break session in between the quarters.

“Really? Are you telling me this is the team on a good day then?” You asked incredulously. The scores were so close but the opponents were still leading by a few. 

“Sadly, yes this is a good day for us. Let’s just give it our all with the cheers for the last round and hope they win.” And almost as if on cue, the whistle blew and the players were back in their positions. 

“Wooo!! C’mon guys!” You hollered as loud as you could. Then the ball was tossed and the clock was counting down the final quarter. 

——— 

“YES CHAN! C’MON YOU GOT THIS!” You and Seungmin weren’t even sitting anymore, you had gathered near the fence and your eyes followed as number 97 was speeding down the field. 

“Oh my god.” Your eyes were getting dry and you felt the need to blink but you forced yourself not to because you didn't want to miss this moment. 

“Holy shi—.” You heard Seungmin barely whisper from under his breath. Heads were turned as everyone watched Chan pass the goal and into the end field right as the clock reached zero.

Before you knew it, the audience around you had erupted into laughter, applaud, cheers, and everything in between. Meanwhile, the football players had circled on the field and were all congratulating one another. 

“Did we just win?” You looked at Seungmin and he turned to you with a gaping mouth, nodded rapidly. 

“You just witnessed the first win of the season!” The two of two started jumping up and down like little kids, smiling and shouting excessively. 

“My throat is so dry from all that screaming, but it paid off.” You smiled and felt light headed, unsure if it was because you were overjoyed or because of all the screaming and dehydration, probably all of the above. 

“Let’s go find Chan and congratulate him!” Seungmin grabbed your arm and pulled you down the steps of the bleachers, past the track and onto the grass. You spotted him from a few feet away but the two of you waited for the crowd to disperse a bit before reaching him. 

“You finally did it man! First win of the season!” Seungmin gave Chan one of those ‘bro-hugs’ and you stood back a bit to give them their space. Chan was just a friend of a friend so you felt awkward approaching him, but still you said your congratulations to him.

“Seungmin said it was your first time coming to one of our games right? Quite a show we put in tonight for you then.” He looked past Seungmin and directed the conversation at you, smiling like he had earlier. You didn’t notice this the first time but he had a dimple on one of his cheeks. His brown hair was tousled in every direction from wearing the helmet and the fringes of his bangs were matted to his forehead with sweat, undoubtedly you still thought he looked quite cute.

 “Yeah, I don’t know anything about football but I think you guys were great tonight!” You said, trying to project your voice so that he could hear you amongst all the other chatter and commotion. 

“She thought you guys were going to lose.” Seungmin noted, making you glare in his direction, silently telling him to shut up. Chan just laughed at the response, which made his smile grow wider. 

“It’s okay, I know we usually don’t do so hot. I’m glad you guys could come and watch us succeed today though. What a relief I exceeded your expectations then.” You smiled and awkwardly chuckled in response, feeling guilty now that you’ve been exposed by Seungmin for being a pessimist. 

“Well it was great seeing you again man, you gotta come over soon. My mom keeps asking where you are these days.” Chan turned back to Seungmin and they exchanged some more words before he focused back on you. “Also, thanks for coming tonight y/n to watch the game, and for accompanying my friend here, he usually goes solo and I pity him sometimes seeing him in the stands alone. Hopefully you’ll come back for our next game.” Honestly you had no plans to, but looking at Chan with his dimple, warm eyes and being convinced by his charming words, you felt like the urge to clear your schedule for it. 

————-

“What do you mean you’re not coming?!” Seungmin spun around in your desk chair and rolled towards your bed where you sat, surrounded by an innumerable amount of paper and textbooks. 

“It means I’m not coming, what words are you not understanding?” You replied without looking up, flipping to the next page in your calculus book. 

“But why not?” He was starting to sound like a whiny toddler and you were already getting frustrated with trying to solve this stupid math equation. 

“Seungmin,” you said firmly, looking at him in the eyes, “why can’t you just find someone else to go with? Can't you see I’m busy? This project isn’t going to finish itself.” You gestured towards the loads of work scattered everywhere. “Go ask Lia or something.”

“No, the last time I tried to bring her along she just kept talking about how pretty she would’ve been as a cheerleader and started to sulk over the fact that she didn’t make the squad. Anyways, you missed last week’s game too! Plus, you had so much fun the first time around.” Seungmin whined, saddened by your blatant, harsh rejection. 

“Right, but like I said I have to get this done. You know I’ll prioritize school work over a sports event any day. Plus, that was a one time thing. I just went for the experience. And now that I’ve experienced it, I can check it off my high school bucket list and move on.” Your focus ripped away from your friend and back to your notebook which was filled with scribbled and incorrect math solutions. You’d been working on this project for what seemed like an eternity and the light at the end of the tunnel was not showing itself. You wanted to scream in frustration. 

“Please come, it’s so much better with you there! Whenever I go alone I feel so… alone.” He watched as you crumpled up another piece of paper and threw at the trash, completely missing. “Plus, take it as a break from all your hard work and studies. You’re clearly stressed and need to unwind, treat yourself!” You eyed him from where you were sitting, going over his words. Maybe he’s right. You did have a lot of fun the first time you went and this project wasn’t due for a few more days.

You sighed, “I don’t know. Perhaps I do need a break.” His eyes lit up at your response and he quickly reached over to shut your textbook and push your notebooks to the side. 

“What are you waiting for then? Those first row seats are going fast.” After a moment, you caved into his words. 

“Alright, grab me the hoodie in my closet.” You ordered and he happily complied. Quickly you threw your hair into an updo and put streaks of gold and red on your cheeks. Slipping on the hoodie, you turned towards Seungmin who gave you a thumbs up. “Okay, let’s go.” 

Right as you guys were about to step out the room, you pulled him back. He gave you a questioning look. “By the way, you should consider being a salesman because sir, you really have a way to convince people with your words.” 

“Please spare me of your corny jokes y/n.” You punched him for his lack of appreciation for your humor as he led the way to his car. With that, you shut the door and the two of you were once again on your way to the school. 

———

“Oh sorry.” You apologized as you bumped into somebody as you tried to squeeze through the crowd and to the bleachers. 

“It’s oka- oh, y/n! Hey, you came back.” The person talking had a familiar voice so you looked up and Chan’s grin came into view. 

“Chan, what are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be on the grass like warming up or something?” Over his shoulder, you could see the rest of his team mates stretching and whatnot by the field. 

“Yeah, but I had to run back to grab something from the lockers. Guess my timing was impeccable because now I’ve run into you. I noticed you didn’t come to the last game so I wasn't expecting you today either.” In last week’s game, Chan had thought you’d tag along with Seungmin like the other time but when he noticed you weren’t there, he felt a slight tinge of disappointment. “Is Seungmin with you too?”

“Yup, he went to grab some food. Sorry about missing the game last week by the way. I was busy.” It sounded like a pathetic excuse but it was the truth, you were caught up trying to study for exams and prepare for a presentation so there was no time in your agenda for a football game. 

“Ah, no worries. You’re here now right? Plus, you didn’t miss anything last week anyways. We ended up losing, pretty badly actually.” He rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly and you felt bad for him. Before, you had always made jokes and poked fun at the team for constantly losing but if you were in their shoes, you would’ve felt so discouraged and perhaps even frustrated. At that moment, you sympathized for him and his teammates. 

“Don’t worry Chan, that was last week so it’s the past now. Focus on today and have hope that you’ll win! Go out there and give it your all. I believe in your and the other players.” You gave him two thumbs up and a cheeky smile and he couldn’t help but laugh at your attempt at a motivational speech. 

“Thanks for the vote of confidence.” He genuinely meant this. Lately, he’s been getting at himself for all the losses this season. Was it because he was an incompetent player? Was he a bad captain? Was he even good at football? All these questions swirled in his head and kept him up at night but having recently won, hearing your cute speech, and seeing you beam sweetly at him, those doubts vanished. 

“Chan! There you are, come over here so we can take some pictures for the school yearbook together!” One of the cheerleaders approached Chan and you watched as she clung onto his side. For a moment, you had forgotten he was the popular team captain. 

“Uh, maybe in a bit Tiffany. I’m busy right no—“ 

“Come on Chan, the photographer for the yearbook club is already here. Plus we look good together.”

You felt like you were intruding on something here and felt so uncomfortable as you witnessed the girl flirt with Chan. You had to get yourself out of the scene. 

“Well I’m going to go grab a seat, good luck Chan!” You hurriedly fled to leave those two alone. 

“Tell Seungmin I said hi. Also, cheer loud for me! I need the support!” He shouted as he was dragged away with the girl. You made your way up to the stands and sadly, you hadn’t made it in time to grab the front row but thankfully, you spotted an empty area not too far back and sat down. 

While you were sitting there waiting for Seungmin—what was taking him so long to get the food?—a realization struck: you just had a full on conversation with the captain of the football team and it was completely void of any awkward tension. You had only met the guy once before and merely exchanged a few words with him. You’d never thought you’d even attend a football game much less two, and now suddenly be on speaking terms with Bang Chan. Senior year was something else. 

“Earth to y/n?” A hand waved in front of your face and you snapped out of your thoughts. You realized it was your best friend—he had finally gotten back with the food. “You good? Why are you spacing out?” He sat down and started munching in the kettle corn. 

“Just thinking how weird it is that I ran into Chan of all people and managed to have a full on, not-awkward conversation with him.” You left out the last bit where the cheerleader came in though, because that was beyond awkward. 

“How is that weird?”

“I don’t know. I just never thought I would be this far out of my safe little shelter. I mean think about it. I’ve stuck with the same handful of friends since freshman year and it wasn’t until like two weeks ago when I finally went to a school event. Now, I’m suddenly chatting up a storm with the captain of the football team and am sitting here sipping on hot chocolate waiting for the game to start, thanks for the hot cocoa by the way.” You blew glenty on the drink and observed the steam dissipate into the night air before taking a sip, pure instant mix hot chocolate flavor, just the way you liked it. 

“Well, when you put it like that, I guess it is sort of odd.” Seungmin nodded in agreement before continuing, “But as long as you’re enjoying yourself, then there’s no problem. Sometimes stepping out of your comfort zone to experience new things has its benefits.”

“You’re right, I guess I’m just finally realizing that now.” You smiled to yourself and watched as the two teams raced around the field. You still lacked knowledge about football, but watching this time around felt even more exciting than the first time. 

———

The team ended up winning again and of course you and Seungmin were so proud of your school for taking home another victory. Just like last time, you two waited around after the game to approach Chan and shower him with compliments and words of praise. 

“I didn’t think we’d be able to do it but we did it.” Chan was still dripping sweat and catching his breath, but his eyes shone brightly with joy. 

“Of course you’d be able to do it! You’re Bang Chan! The one and only.” You bobbed your head in agreement with Seungmin’s words. You had to give it to him, he was the best hype man a person could ask for. 

“Thanks. Anyways, the team and I were planning to grab some pizza at the local shop nearby as a mini celebration, do you guys want to come?” Immediately you shook your head while Seungmin on the other hand had accepted the invitation without a second thought. 

“I know this is a lot to ask of you and you’re probably going to say ‘sorry, I have to go finish my math project’ but please y/n. You’re already here and the night is still young.” Seungmin was clinging onto your right arm like a koala and you rolled your eyes at his antics. 

“If you knew I was going to bring up my math project then why bother trying to beg? Now let go of my arm you big baby.” You tried to wriggle your arm from out of his clutch but then someone grabbed onto your other arm.

“Please y/n.” You looked to your left and Chan was acting like koala 2.0. You expected this from Seungmin, you’re long-time best friend, but you had just met Chan on one other occasion and yet he acted like you two were the best of pals. You were taken aback by this but couldn’t manage to get either of them to let go, and the close proximity to Chan was starting to make the blood rush to your cheeks. God, you had to get them off of you before your face grew any redder. 

“Yes, okay! I’ll go!” They instantly detached themselves from your arms and high-fived each other, you let out a breath of relief. “One of you has to pay though, I don’t care who.” 

So there you were, sitting in the red and white colored booth stuck between Seungmin and the football team captain himself with a slice of piping hot pizza in front of you. This is not how you thought things would turn out. 

When everyone had arrived at the pizzeria, it was chaos. People were throwing out their orders and topping preferences and others were fighting to grab a table. You quickly told Chan your order, as he offered to pay, and pulled Seungmin to a booth before all of them were taken. Luckily, there was one last one that was unoccupied at the corner. When Chan had came to the table with the pie in hand, you thought he would take the other side of the booth but someone had spilled sticky soda all over the seat so that’s how you found yourself in this current predicament, squished between two teenage boys in a stuffy old booth, on a weekday night.

The three of you were eating and mindlessly talking when a group of girls drew closer towards you guys. You figured they must’ve wanted to talk to Chan so you continued eating quietly. 

“Chan you were amazing tonight! You really led the team to another win, I knew you could do it.” You recognized her, it was the same girl from earlier—Tiffany? 

“Thanks, hope you enjoyed the game.” Chan responded politely. 

“Of course I did silly. Anyways, do you want to join me and the others over there?” She pointed towards the other side of the pizzeria where most of the players and cheerleaders were gathered. 

“I’m good here, thanks for asking though.” She looked shocked at his response and for the first time, she averted her attention away from Chan to focus on you and Seungmin. Her eyes rolled right over Seungmin but stopped at you. Her gaze made you feel all ansty and self-conscious, but you tried your best not to show it. “Okay, well call me then.” She said before turning back and moving back to the other side of the room. 

It was silent for a while before Chan broke the tension. 

“So you like pineapple on pizza?” Chan said, biting into his own slice.

“Well yeah, it’s the superior topping.” The combination of sweet and salty was the best.

“Do you perhaps like mint chocolate ice cream too?” He asked, handing you a napkin as he noticed the smear of tomato sauce on your cheek. You nodded in thanks. 

“It’s not my favorite but I wouldn’t pass it up if offered.” You shrugged and grabbed another slice of pizza. 

“Seungmin,” Chan said, which caught the attention of the boy on the other side of you. “I like this girl. She had good tast–” Your eyes nearly popped out of their sockets at his words and he didn’t manage to finish his sentence before you started coughing, almost choking on your food. 

“Y/n, are you okay?” They simultaneously asked in alarm and you silently gave them the  ‘ok’ hand signal while inhaling down your drink, trying to wash down the pizza and calm yourself.

“All good.” You were not all good. You were just about to choke on pizza while some guy you barely even knew proclaimed that he liked you out of the blue. 

“Anyways, as I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted by someone choking.” You slapped his arm and he laughed in response. “She’s got good taste and quite the sense of humor. I see why you ditch me at school to hang out with her now.” He joked, was he teasing you already? This guy seriously warms up to new people fast.

Thank gosh no other light-hearted confessions were made for the rest of the dinner, you didn’t think you could handle anymore heart-stopping jokes for the night.

“Wait.” Seungmin said suddenly, just as you guys were about to start wrapping this up and leaving.

“What?” You looked at him, waiting for a reply.

“I think y/n is our lucky charm.” He said with too much confidence. You whipped your head to look at him.

“What nonsense are you sputtering now? I am no one’s lucky charm. Do I look like that tiny leprechaun on a box of cereal to you?” You asked, feigning offense. 

“Well, I think you got the tiny part down.” Chan pointed out, and for the nth time you smacked him on the arm. Sure you were on the short side but there was no need to rub it in.

“That’s not what I meant y/n.” Seungmin gave you a deadpanned look before carrying on. “Anyways think about it guys, the first time y/n came to the game, the team won. Then she didn’t go to last week’s game and we lost. And today, she attended and we won again. Seeing a pattern?” He looked at you two expectedly, waiting for you guys to catch on. “I’ve connected the two dots.”

“You didn’t connect shi-” You started but Chan cut you off.

“You’re right!” His face brightened and turned towards you. “Y/n, you are our good luck charm! . You facepalmed yourself, these two shared the same three brain cells. 

“Right, and you’re Santa Claus.” You said with thick sarcasm dripping from your voice, “You guys are ridiculous. Now help me clean up please.” You referred to the table which was covered in dirty napkins, crumbs, and parmesan cheese packets everywhere. Thankfully they obeyed and started clearing the mess.

“No seriously, we have been losing all season and the moment you show up, it’s like all that is erased and we win!” Chan tried to reason, but you weren’t having any of it.

“It’s just a coincidence. It’s you and your teammates that are doing the work and bringing in the luck. I am merely just an audience member, an observer.” You shook your head at them and continued wiping down the table.

“Don’t take our word for it then, but you have to go to the next game!” Seungmin announced as he tried to reorganize the condiments on the side. You had just gone to the game and no time had passed before you were urged to go to another one. 

“I’ll think about it.” You peered over at Chan and he was smiling uncontrollably while Seungmin was happy dancing. What did you just get yourself into?

–––––

Ever since the spontaneous pizza meeting and the half hearted promise to attend the football games, you’ve been seeing Chan more and more at school. Sometimes you’d just notice each other in the halls and mouth “hi” or other times it was passing period and he’d see you and ask  “how are you?” before the seven minutes were up. As the days continued, he just increasingly  appeared in your frame of vision and it left you confused.

Both of you had been in the same grade year, at the same school for the past four years but you swore you’ve never even noticed him before and now he was everywhere. He’d be near your locker in the morning tagging alongside Seungmin, greeting you with a sunny smile and fresh look that contrasted greatly to your own glum expression and ‘just rolled out of bed’ appearance. It was seven am, you had an excuse to look like this you reasoned, making yourself feel better. 

Lately, he even sat with you and your tablemates at lunch. Your group of friends was shocked at first. Questions like “why is a football player sitting with us?” and “why is the football team captain sitting with us?” were exchanged amongst the table and you didn’t know how to answer because, why was he sitting with you guys all of a sudden? Eventually everyone got used to it though; he came around so often and no one objected. Initially, your friends had thought he was the stereotypical jock that acted all mighty and superior, but soon enough they realized he was the complete opposite of that. He was nice, funny, intelligent, and easy to get along with. He’d help your friends whenever they were struggling to finish their homework last minute, and he’d join in on the games of uno, go fish, and whatever else. 

Frankly, you didn’t mind his presence either and Seungmin was absolutely basking in delight because both of his best friends were now with him at school, playing the same card games and eating the same shitty school food together. You didn’t know when or how, but Chan just eased his way into your life and you had accepted it for the most part. However, there were moments when you still questioned him though, and one day you figured you might as well clear the confusion in your head. 

“Hey Chan.” He was currently teaching you how to play poker. 

“What’s up buttercup?” 

“Don’t call me buttercup.” You fixed a glare at him. “Anyways, I hope this doesn’t come off as a weird question but, why have you hung out with us everyday at lunch?” He didn’t say anything for a second and you regretted asking.

“Hm, I guess I just like it here. Your friends are nice, Seungmin is here,” he pointed towards the boy who was on his third pack of vending machine chips. “And you’re here.” You tried not to make anything out of that last comment and brushed it off.

“What about your other friends?”

“Other friends?” He raised an eyebrow at you and continued shuffling the cards.

“You know, the people you normally hung out with before you started hanging out with us?” 

“I didn’t have any friends.” He said and you scoffed, not believing it for a second.

“You? Captain of the football team. Mr. Bang Chan himself didn’t have any friends until you met us?” You said incredulously. 

“I mean I had Seungmin.” 

“He couldn’t have been your only friend.”

“No, I guess he wasn’t–”

“I knew it.”

“You didn’t let me finish. He wasn’t my only friend but I felt like he was my only true friend.”

“What do you mean?” 

“I mean, it all felt so fake, so forced. Like I have my teammates and they’re chill, but we were just teammates, we didn’t hang out much besides practice or games. It’s like, just because you’re classmates, that doesn’t automatically make you all friends right?” You understood what he was saying and agreed. “And everyone else… well, it just felt ungenuine. I know many of them just tried to befriend me for the connection and to have the ability to say ‘I’m friends with the football captain’ but it wasn’t anything more.” At that point, you had wished you never pried. You felt like you had just pushed him to open Pandora’s box and that’s not what you had intended.

“Look Chan, I’m sorry I got nosy. I didn’t mean to ask you that and pry–” The apology started spilling out your mouth but the smile on his lips made you stop. “Why are you smiling? Shouldn’t you be offended and mad at me?”

“No, of course not. I know you must’ve felt weird that I randomly started hanging around you and your friends and I’m glad we got to clear up any confusion.” He said softly, looking at you from across the table. “I genuinely enjoy being around everyone at this table, especially you, so you don’t have to question it anymore. Okay?”

You kept replaying the words in your mind, ‘especially you.’ How could he say these things so easily and not realize how fast it made your heart pound or how sweaty your palms got? You couldn’t focus for the rest of lunch as he tried to teach you the ins and outs of poker. 

————- 

Weeks had passed and you, Seungmin, and Chan were like three peas in a pod—inseparable and going everywhere together. 

One day, you guys had planned on a hang out with three spots on the schedule planned. First was to hit up the arcade—Chan’s idea—and then grab dinner at Olive Garden—Seungmin said he was craving their breadsticks—-and lastly the cherry on top would be ice cream—-your suggestion. 

“Ready to get your ass handed in air hockey big shot?” You teased Chan as three headed to the arcade. 

“Oh, you’re so on.” He narrowed his eyes at you in the rear view mirror and you laughed from the backseat. 

“Woah, we should make this more exciting. Make it a wager.” Seungmin proposed from the passenger’s side. 

“What do you have in mind?” You stuck your head in between the two seats and looked at him. 

“Whoever loses...has to dress up as a fanatic at the last game of the season.”

“Isn’t the last game next week?” You asked, and the boys nodded in confirmation.

“Anyways I was thinking big fluffy tutu, face paint, a colored wig.” Seungmin listed out.

“Oh, and my jersey!” You made a disgusted face at Chan.

“Your jersey? You mean the one you sweat in and get both mud and grass stains all over?” The image of it alone was already disturbing, you couldn’t imagine actually putting it on.

“You know I wash it right?”

“Well regardless, what are we going to do if Chan loses though? He can’t do any of that, he had a uniform code to abide by.” You pointed out.

“Good point, if he loses he has to wear all of that to the after party then.”

“After party? Isn’t that only thrown when the team wins? What if the team doesn’t win?” You pointed out.

“The team will win.” Chan said with full confidence.

“No offense, but how are you so sure?” 

“Because, you’re our lucky charm.” 

________

“This is so unfair! He is an athlete! His hand eye coordination is way better than us common folk!” You shouted in disbelief as the last puck went into your goal, signaling that both you and Seungmin lost. 

“Don’t hate the player, hate the game.” Chan teased as he proceeded to do a victory dance as you and your other friend stared at him unamused. “Oh wait. I only have one extra jersey though, so only one of you can wear it.”

“All yours Seungmin!” 

“What, no way! You should wear it, you had the least amount of points between the two of us.” 

“I– you– ugh!” You couldn’t argue with that. You had to accept the fate of wearing that dingy, stinky, jersey now.

“If it makes you feel any better, I’ll do my best to wash it before then.” Chan added, finding it cute how you scrunched up your nose and pouted.

“Great, how reassuring.” 

“Ok that’s enough arcade for tonight. My pocket is running dry and those breadsticks are waiting.” Seungmin stated before making it towards the door with you and Chan following behind. 

The night was coming to an end and you guys were at the last stop–the ice cream shop. The three of you ordered a sundae and took turns scooping from the mountain of frozen dairy, chocolate syrup, whipped cream, and rainbow sprinkles. 

“Are you nervous for the last game? You're going against the toughest school right?” You asked, looking at Chan who sat on the other side of the table with Seungmin. 

“A little, but for some reason I just feel really confident in the team so I think we will be fine.” 

“No doubt you got this in the bag man.” Seungmin said through a mouthful of ice cream.

“Nasty! Shut your mouth while you're eating Seungmin!” You tossed a crumpled up napkin at him.

“You’re one to talk, you’re quite a messy eater yourself.” Chan mentioned, reaching over to swipe the chocolate syrup off the corner of your lips. Regardless of how close you two had gotten over these last few weeks, his little gestures like these always caught you off guard, like wiping the corner of your mouth, guiding you somewhere with his hand on the small of your back, walking you to every class period. You’ve known Seungmin for years and he never did these things! Was it because he wasn’t chivalrous enough? Or was Chan too chivalrous? You shook your head of those thoughts and helped the two finish up the sundae.

–––––––––-  

This had got to be the worst outfit you ever wore you thought to yourself as you looked at your reflection in the mirror. The tulle skirt was actually cute but everything else was simply hideous. Seungmin had brought over the accessories in the early evening and you two had spent the last hour or two dressing up and getting ready for tonight’s game. You wore a wine red wig with gold stars painted across your cheeks and of course you kept your end of the deal and had Chan’s jersey on too, which surprisingly smelt of fresh linen. Seungmin on the other hand wore a bright yellow mohawk wig with half his face painted red, adorned with his very own tutu, which was layered over his pants, as well. You two looked awful but extremely hilarious.

“If I don’t get accepted into a college. I could go to the circus looking like this.” 

“Clown college is always an option.” Seungmin joked and you two laughed at your appearances until there were tears in your eyes. 

“Ready to go?” 

“Yup, let’s blow Chan’s socks off with these outfits.”

While you two were busy getting ready for the game, Chan was trying to prepare himself too, but mentally. It wasn’t that he was nervous about the game or the team losing, he had total confidence tonight would bring in another victory. The team had been doing well so far and everyone had been practicing extra hard for this final event. What he was really nervous about was seeing you. 

It had been weeks since he had first met you and the more he had gotten to know you, the more feelings he developed and the harder he fell for you. He had first seen you in the stands when Seungmin introduced you to him and he thought it was funny, yet adorable how your cheeks were stuffed like chipmunks with fried oreos. As time passed, he realized that you weren’t just cute, but so sarcastic, funny, and clever. He loved the way you made him laugh so easily and seeing your eyes turn to crescent moons whenever you smiled affected him more than you would ever know. 

He was planning on confessing to you today, to finally say the words ‘I like you.’ He had tried to do it multiple times before, but he never had the courage. Today was different though. Today you’d be wearing his jersey to the game and he was going to win, afterwards you’d meet him on the field and he’d run to you to say those three words and you guys would gaze into each other's eyes under the twinkling stars before going to the after party together, officially as a couple. That’s how the scene played in his head anyways. 

It was hard to not notice you when you had arrived. Both you and Seungmin stuck out like sore thumbs with the extravagant wigs and tutu combination. He couldn’t keep in his laughter and approached you two, meeting halfway. 

“You guys look amazing. Stars of the show tonight.” He looked at Seungmin before switching his gaze to you. Although he admitted the outfit had some clashing elements, he still thought you looked cute and pretty as ever. Seeing you in his jersey, which was just a bit too big on you, made his heart flip. There you were smiling at him with the light shining on your face, rosy cheeks, and his name written on your backside. How could he stop himself from falling for you?

“Thanks man, if we didn’t lose that game in air hockey, we would’ve never had the excuse to dress up like this. Like the mohawk?” Seungmin pointed to his hair.

“Love it. It’s a great look on you.” He looked at Seungmin before switching his gaze to you. Although he admitted the outfit had some clashing elements, he still thought you looked cute and pretty as ever. Seeing you in his jersey, which was just a bit too big on you, made his heart flip. There you were smiling at him with the light shining on your face, rosy cheeks, and his name written on your backside. How could he stop himself from falling for you?

“We’re going to the party after the game too right? I told my parents I was going to be home late today.” You asked. 

“Yeah, that’s the plan.” Chan said. 

“The game is about to begin, you should get going Chan, we will be in the stands cheering for you.” You reassured him before moving towards the steps to the bleachers, he grabbed your wrist to stop you though. 

“After we win tonight, meet me down on the field right after okay? Don’t wait, I have something important to tell you.” 

“Okay, now go before you’re scolded by the coach!” You ran up the stairs and assumed Seungmin was right behind you, in actuality he had stayed back for a second to talk to Chan. 

“Are you ready man? After you win you gotta use whatever adrenaline left and build up the courage to tell her.” Seungmin reminded Chan, hoping he wouldn’t back out of the confession again. He had been the wingman for weeks now and every time he thought Chan would do it, he didn’t. When his best friend first told him that he had a crush on your other best friend, he was momentarily appalled at the idea. However, after hearing Chan’s explanations on why he likes you and his feelings, he figured third wheeling you two wouldn’t be too bad as long as the both of you were happy, so he went along with it. 

He thought you’d catch onto Chan’s hints and subtle flirting, but either you were too dense or intentionally ignored it. Regardless, he and Chan had been planning this night for too long and he could not let his friend fail again. 

“Don’t worry. I’m going to do it.” 

“Okay, I’m really rooting for you.” 

Then Seungmin joined you in the bleachers and shortly after, the game commenced. 

———- 

It was intense. The opponents were just as good as the rumors made them out to be and your school’s team wasn’t leading, but they weren’t far behind either.

The other team had called for a time out and so the game was on pause. You were nervously eyeing the scoreboard and looked around in the field to find Chan. Was he feeling more pressured now? Hopefully he still had the confidence from earlier. You spotted him, with his back turned, but it was as if he knew you were looking at him because he circled around and locked eyes with you. You gave him two thumbs up and he returned the gesture. 

The whistle blew and everyone got back into their positions. The time was running again and the crowd was cheering nonstop. 

They had to win. 

It was the first game you’d ever gone to over the last few weeks that had gone over time but surely enough, the school reigned victorious. 

“Y/n, remember you had to meet Chan at the field right?” Seungmin reminded you, and thankfully he did because you were so caught up with the win that you’d forgotten for a second 

 “Oh, right. Are you coming?” 

“No, I’ll catch up with you guys in a bit.” With that you left Seungmin and hurried down the bleachers. You had made it to the track and was halfway to the field when you noticed Chan, but he wasn’t alone. 

You stopped mid-step and watched as the unknown girl wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him. You couldn’t see her face form here but you had a feeling it was Tiffany again. Your eyebrows furrowed at the sight and there was a sinking feeling in your stomach. 

He said he had something important to tell you. When he said that, a big part of you was looking forward to the end of the game. Not because you wanted to see them win, but because you wanted to hear him tell you what was so important. Was it that he liked you just as much as you liked him? When these feelings first developed, you tried to bury them. Not only was he Seungmin’s friend, which would make things weird, but because you weren’t sure if he was single, and  even if he was, why would he like you when there were so many other girls at the school? But you were bad at burying feelings and it didn’t help that you saw him everyday at school and even more so when you hung out. 

You had been hopeful though, perhaps by some miracle he had a crush on you too. But from the looks of it now, you had been wrong. So you stood there staring like a fool as the girl continued to kiss him. It must’ve been only second but it felt like forever. You snapped out of it when you realized hot tears were running down your cheeks, so you turned to leave through the school gates. 

————-

Chan pushed her off and immediately put distance between himself and the girl. “What are you doing Tiffany?!” 

“Why do you keep calling me Tiffany? You used to call me Tiff or princess.” She said, stomping her feet out of frustration. Chan wanted to roll his eyes at her childish behavior. 

“That was before.” Before was when Chan and Tiffany were together and known as the ‘it’ couple amongst the school. She was the head cheerleader and he was team captain, it was just like all those cheesy teen rom-coms. At the time, he had never dated anyone before and thought what they had was fun, but there was no real chemistry. It had lasted for almost a year but Chan had broken it off. “We’re not together anymore.” 

“Then let’s get back together.” She reached out to him but he stepped back. 

“No, there’s no chance for us anymore Tiffany. I gotta go find someone.” So he left the flabbergasted girl in the middle of the field as he ran off in search of another girl who was in a brightly colored tutu and the jersey with his name on it. With no luck he saw Seungmin and went up to him. 

“Where is she?” Chan asked anxiously.

“What do you mean? I thought she was with you.” Seungmin asked in a wary tone. 

“What? No, I haven’t seen her.” 

“Chan, she left right after the game ended to look for you. How can you possibly be telling me you missed the girl in a bright ass wig and a tulle skirt?” He asked in disbelief. 

“Oh shi—“

————

Thankfully the walk home wasn’t too bad, besides having the cold air nip at your bare skin, it wasn’t a very long walk and before you knew it you were already on the front porch unlocking the door. 

Your parents were already fast asleep and you didn’t want to wake them so you gently closed the door and made way to your room. Your reflection in the mirror revealed the streaks of eyeliner that were smudged around your eyes and the face paint was no longer intact. Washing your face, you tore off all the ridiculous clothes and slipped on your oversized t-shirts and sweats. 

This was so stupid. You felt like a protagonist in one of those typical romance films which is the last thing you had wanted. There you were wrecked in tears, crushing over some guy on a Friday night and he didn’t even realize it. The game was over so he was probably at the after party with that girl right now, meanwhile you were sulking under the covers in bed. 

The phone on your nightstand was chiming non-stop and it dawned on you that you just left Seungmin without a single word. Quickly you swiped your screen open and went to your messages.

Over thirty-two texts–twelve of which were from Seungmin and the rest were all from Chan. You disregarded the latter and tapped on your best friend’s name.

(8:42 pm)

[ seungminnie ] hey, wya?

(8:45 pm)

[ seungminnie ] r u in the bathroom?

(8:46 pm)

[ seungminnie ] wait, did u leave already?

(9:04 pm)

[ you ] yeah, i was feeling tired so i left. sorry, hope you have fun at the party tho. 

You hit send and shut off your phone for the rest of the night. The rest of the night was uneventful as you laid awake, running through everything that had led you up to this point. From the first football game, meeting Chan, befriending him, falling for him, then being crestfallen because of him.

This is why you always stuck to the things you knew, the things you were comfortable with. It had been like this for so long and the one time you finally tried to live life a little bit carefree with less restraints, it backfires. You wanted to blame him for causing this pain in your chest and the waterworks, but at the end of it all, it was your fault for thinking things would be different. Meeting Chan made you optimistic; perhaps those stereotypes about football players and high school kids were wrong. It was your fault for stepping outside of your safe little bubble and expecting things to be okay. You were naive.

————

The afterparty was a bust. After Seungmin had received the text from you, he informed Chan and the two of them were no longer in the mood to go, but everyone else was still in a celebratory mood and the team ushered Chan to join. How could the team captain not go to the party? 

So there he was, sitting on the couch while Seungmin was off trying to grab more sodas. He had plastered on a fake smile when people greeted him. Sure he was happy that they had won, but he didn’t feel like dancing, or mingling, or whatever else teenagers did at parties. All he could think about was how he messed up again at trying to confess to you. You must’ve seen what happened, there was no other reason for you to leave so abruptly like that. He had sent so many texts, sporadic apologies mixed with incoherent explanations. All left unread, unresponded. How was he going to fix this? You clearly didn’t even want to talk to him.

Seungmin came back with two cans in hand and Chan thanked him before popping it open with a satisfying fizz. His friend joined him on the couch and for a while, they just sat quietly, occasionally sipping on the sweet drink while the room around them continued to move to the music and muddled conversations filled the atmosphere. Finally, one of them spoke.

“What am I going to do?” Chan asked, defeat lined his voice.

“Do you really like her man?” Seungmin already knew the answer, but he had to ask.

“Yeah, I really do.” He said without a moment’s hesitation. Chan didn’t have much wisdom or experience when it came to relationships. He’s had crushes on different people before and many have tried to get his attention but none of them had the same effect on him as you did. 

“Then wait until she’s ready to approach you again and fight for her. It’s going to take time but if you want to make it happen, you have to try.” 

Seungmin was right. This wasn’t going to be simple, but he had to try. For you, he would.  

————

You tried to recover over the weekend and Seungmin sent you some texts, checking up on you to ask if you were alright. You were grateful for his concern and reassured him that you were okay, and in a way, it was a half lie, half truth. It was going to take more than two days to get over heartache, but you were prepared to let it go and move on, especially when you realized that it was your mistake to begin with and that even if Chan didn’t like you that way, you still enjoyed having him as a friend. All these weeks you spent with him brought you happiness and you didn’t want to erase all of that just because of some silly feelings. 

Coming to that conclusion, you finally opened the texts that he had sent but you had been ignoring for the last three days. 

(Friday 8:50 pm)

[ chan ] seungmin told me you left, i hope you made it home safely

(Friday 8:51 pm)

[ chan ] he told me u were going to meet me after the game. u must’ve seen us. im sorry

It was difficult to continue reading as your eyes began to blur but you swiped away the tears that threatened to spill and kept scrolling. 

(Friday 8:53 pm)

[ chan ] i really wanted to talk to u. Ik what you must be thinking but it’s nothing, i promise. she isn’t my girlfriend. we used to date but that was a long time ago. it's over now. 

[ chan ] please reply. 

[ chan ] im sorry y/n. seriously, im so sorry. 

(Friday 9:27 pm)

[ chan ] i’ll wait for u until ur ready to talk to me. gn 

That was the last text he sent you. It was just a few sentences but you let out a shaky breath and tossed your phone to the side. He wanted to talk to you, and you wanted to talk to him too. Was it just a big misunderstanding? He said the girl wasn’t his girlfriend, but rather an ex. That didn’t automatically guarantee he was single though, did it? Also, if she was an ex, why did he kiss her then? You groaned and fell into your bed, face planting into the pillows. 

This was so confusing. You should’ve never developed feelings for him. Whether he was single or not shouldn’t matter to you anymore, you just wanted to joke around, make sarcastic comments with each other, and be platonic friends like before. It was less stressful and complicated that way. 

————

Monday rolled around and you gave yourself a mini pep talk before walking through the school doors. You were determined to face him and not break down. This was going to be fine. You whispered to yourself as you spotted Seungmin near your locker, Chan wasn’t with him. Both a little disappointing, yet relieving. 

“Morning gorgeous, you doing well?” Seungmin leaned against your locker door as you grabbed your belongings.

“Well hello to you too gorgeous.” You joked, no matter how bad your weekend was, having your best friend nearby always cheered you up. “I’m doing alright this morning, woke up on the right side of the bed.” 

“That’s good, um, are you going to talk to him today?” He asked cautiously, hoping that it didn’t come off too pushy or nosy.

“Yeah. He said he needed to talk to me after the game right? Might as well see what he had to say.” You shut the metal door and together, you and Seungmin walked to first period. 

Half the school day had passed and the bell rang, signaling that it was lunch. This was it, you were going to face him now. You were afraid he’d avoid you because he didn’t sneak up behind you in the halls or walk your classes today like he usually did, but you saw his figure sitting at the lunch tables through the glass windows. Slowly you made your way to the bench. His back was turned to you so you gently poked his shoulder; he turned and looked up, a gentle smile spread across his face when his chocolate brown eyes locked onto yours. 

“Hey.” 

“Hi.” He breathed out, standing up to match you. “Can we go somewhere to talk?” His hands were shoved in his pockets and he looked at you nervously.

“Yeah.” 

He led the way and you stuck close behind him. Soon the school’s garden came into view and thankfully most people didn’t come here, it was sort of hidden behind all the buildings, so you two had the area to yourself. It was so quiet and mellow here, there weren’t many flowers in bloom due to the recent season change, but it was still very beautiful. 

You sat on the little wooden bench that was placed in the center and he did too, leaving some room in between you two.  

“So, what did you want to talk about?” You started, looking down at your lap to avoid looking at him.

“I’m sorry. That’s the first thing I want to tell you.” He had all his attention on you. Chan paused for a moment before continuing, “You saw me with that girl the other night didn’t you?” You nodded your head wordlessly. His shoulders slumped at your confirmation but he figured you did.v“I know what you saw must’ve been really bad and you probably came up with many assumptions but I’m here to tell you that none of that is true. We aren’t together.” He said firmly.

“Then why did you kiss her?” Your voice was a mere whisper.

“I didn’t kiss her, she just came onto me and I was shocked. Once I had realized what was happening and who it was, I immediately stopped it and told her that she and I were completely over.” Some of the pain in your heart eased hearing this but you didn’t want to be too optimistic.

“Why are you telling me this?”

“Because I need you to know that I am not with her. I am not with anyone.” He said vehemently, leaving no room for doubts. “Y/n, please look at me.” When you didn’t, he gently grasped your chin and turned your head so he could finally meet your eyes. You had a dejected expression and your eyes were glazed over with trapped tears. He cupped your cheek with the palm of his hand; the warmth and closeness made your heart flutter. 

“Y/n.”

“Mmhhm?” You didn’t have the ability to form words at the moment. His touch made you lightheaded and you couldn’t think straight. 

“I like you.” His gaze never tore away from yours. 

“What?” Your forehead wrinkled in puzzlement.  He liked you? Bang Chan, captain of the football team. The boy everyone wanted to be friends with and the guy nearly all the girls swooned for. Bang Chan liked you?

“I. Like. You. Not just as a friend. I like you as a person that I want to go on dates with, hold hands with, make happy memories and experience the highs and lows of life with.” He was so close to you now that you could feel his breath on your cheeks. “You are the girl I wanted to hold in the middle of the field that night and say these words to. I’m sorry that didn’t happen but it’s better late than never.” The words were slowly processing through your head but unconsciously, a grin formed on your lips and red was rushing to your cheeks. 

“Chan, I like you too.” The words came out so easily and the boy immediately broke out into the brightest smile you’ve ever seen.

He leaned in close but before your lips connected he whispered, “Can I kiss you now?”

“Yes.” If someone were to have told you a few months back that you’d be kissing Chan under the cloud-dotted, blue autumn sky after he just confessed his feelings for you, you would’ve guessed they were insane, but there you were now doing exactly that and nothing could’ve made you happier. 

You had always been afraid of trying new things and straying from your typical routine because you didn’t know what challenges life had in store once you’ve ventured too far. Undoubtedly, stepping out of your comfort zone was difficult. Nevertheless, it was worth it because it led you here to this very moment. 

also here is my masterlist in case you want to read my other works!

[splendidly-secret-sick-fics]

That last fic was really sweet! Would you possibly be willing to do a continuation with BokuAka and KageHina perspectives? x

Why So Mean? 

Pairing: sick Kageyama, caretaker Hinata

Word Count: 5,625

Warnings: vomiting, swearing, meanie kageyama :(

————————————————————

Hello hello! Long time no see :)

ABSO-FREAKING-LUTELY I WILL DO THIS. You and another asked for this and I’m SO HYPE ABOUT IT. So thank you!! I’ll answer the other ask with the Akaashi part :)

My timeline w the Kuroo chapter (& most likely the Akaashi one once it’s fully written) do not line up with this one at all. Please just ignore that and pretend it all makes sense. Thank you much appreciated.

If you prefer reading on ao3, check it out here!

Kuroo Part

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Kageyama was being a jerk today.

Well...a bigger jerk than normal anyway.

Things were fine up until about the middle of afternoon practice. In fact, Kageyama was almost unnervingly nice to Hinata until that afternoon.

When Hinata woke him up, he didn’t grumble or swear at him (he was almost pleasant!). He pecked the top of Hinata’s head in a cute sleepy haze on his way to the bathroom (PDA? Even with the risk of someone catching them?!). He even let Hinata pick off his plate at breakfast (without smacking his hand away or swearing!).

However, something must have set his boyfriend off. He was being cold, ignoring Hinata’s complaints and questions. He was almost completely silent while they were playing. It was freaking Hinata out.

During their practice matches, Kageyama was consistently flawless as usual, Hinata was really on his game, and the other spikers were in good form as well. His foul mood couldn’t be because they weren’t playing well.

It also couldn’t be because anyone picked a fight with him either. Kageyama got along with most of the players at these training camps. He even did serve practice with some players from Shinzen and Ubugawa last night when Hinata went to practice with Bokuto and Kuroo.

So when Hinata couldn’t figure it out himself, he marched up to Kageyama during a water break and demanded to know what was wrong.

“Hey! What’s up with you today?”

“Hah?” Kageyama asked sharply, glaring down at Hinata.

“You’ve been really quiet for the last two hours and you’re being a butthead right now!” Hinata snapped back. He wasn’t backing down when he knew he was right. He knew something was bothering Kageyama. He just had to find out what it was and then he could try and make things better for him.

Kageyama blinked at him for a few seconds before his face melted into a deeper-than-normal- scowl. It was more...confused than angry though. Hinata thought that he was about to relent and finally tell him what was wrong.

Instead he scoffed and walked away.

Hinata’s jaw dropped as he watched his boyfriend walk away. How dare he?

He clenched his fists and scoffed as well.

For the rest of their practice matches, Hinata and Kageyama avoided any non-volleyball related interactions. However, by the end of their last game, Kageyama looked so pitiful that Hinata couldn’t find it in himself to be angry anymore.

Instead, he sat beside Kageyama who plopped himself heavily onto the floor as soon as they finished their penalty lap. He was leaning against the wall, panting.

Hinata turned his head to observe him. He was sweaty and breathless as to be expected. Hinata was also trying to catch his breath and wipe away the sweat before it dripped in his eyes. What was unexpected was the pale tint to his skin, probably barely noticeable to other people. But Hinata, who spent an exorbitant amount of time studying Kageyama’s face, noticed.

His eyes scanned Kageyama’s face and saw the near imperceptible blush rising to his cheeks as well. Was it from the running? Or…

Hinata’s hand moved towards Kageyama’s forehead but before he could touch it, Kageyama’s hand slapped it away.

“Ow! What the heck? That hurt, Yama!” Hinata cradled his hand against his chest.

“What are you doing, dumbass?” Kageyama snapped. Hinata took a moment to be utterly flabbergasted at the malice laced in the reply. It felt unwarranted, given that Hinata was a) his boyfriend and b) just trying to help.

“I’m trying to figure out why you’re being such a freakin’ asshole today, Jerkyama,” he narrowed his eyes and glared up at Kageyama. The setter’s lip curled and he clicked his tongue.

“I don’t know why you’re so in my fucking face today, idiot,” Kageyama spit back so venomously that Hinata almost instinctively recoiled.

“Cause I know something is wrong and I don’t know why you’re hiding it from me!” Hinata yelled back. What the fuck was his problem?

Hinata could feel the eyes of his teammates on them now, probably wondering what was causing their dynamic duo to fight this time. Thankfully, they kept their distance. He knew they’d step in if they needed to, but he and Kageyama have gotten a lot better at resolving things themselves. (And that has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that they are secretly dating. Nope.)

“I don’t have to tell you everything. You’re not my mom,” Kageyama shrugged sharply. “Just back off okay? Fuck. You’re so clingy. Let me breathe,” he exhaled and turned his head away again.

The words cut through Hinata’s chest painfully.  He gaped at Kageyama for a moment before standing up quickly and glaring down at Kageyama.

“Fine. What the fuck ever, Shitty-yama. I don’t know what crawled up your ass today, but I’m sorry for caring. Come find me when you’ve got your shit together and you’re ready to be my boyfriend again,” Hinata seethed and walked away.

If Kageyama was going to be such a jerk, he would go practice with Kuroo and them again until Kageyama decided to not be a dick.

“Hinata,” Suga called out to him. Hinata inhaled and slowly turned to face his upperclassmen.

“Yeah?” He asked as calmly and normally as possible.

“Is everything alright? Looked like things got pretty intense. You guys haven’t fought like that in a while,” Suga asked and put a hand on Hinata’s shoulder. He squeezed, eyes wide and a concerned frown on his face and Hinata’s anger melted. They hadn’t officially come out as a couple to the team or anything yet, but it’s not like the team didn’t know how close the two were recently. Even if they believed it was only as friends.

“Yeah,” he huffed, “I don’t know. Something’s bothering him, but he won’t tell me. I almost thought for a second that he might be sick, but if he has enough energy to be such a huge buttwad, then that’s probably not what it is.” Suga nodded in understanding.

“Want me to keep an eye on him?”

Hinata peered over Suga’s shoulder to where Kageyama was still sitting. Yachi was sitting facing him on her knees, clearly trying to get him to talk to her. If he was responding, Hinata couldn’t tell. Kageyama’s knees held his knees to his chest, his head resting loosely on his arms. He was about to say yes, absolutely, please, until he remembered that they were just friends in the eyes of the team and he therefore had no reason to be as concerned as he was.

“Uh pft, what?” he tried to cover, “if you want--I mean--I don’t care--it’s not like we’re dating or anything. If he wants to be an idiot, that’s his problem.” Suga raised his eyebrows at him.

“I’ll have him practice setter switches with me then,” Suga said with a soft smile.

“Okay. If you want to… it might help him...,” Hinata replied, grateful that Suga wasn’t questioning his weird reaction. Suga ruffled his hair before prancing over to the rest of the team to coerce them into more practice.

Hinata inhaled slowly and exhaled away his frustration. Then he turned and skipped over to where Kenma and Kuroo were chatting quietly.

“Kuroo-san!” Hinata called and ran up to them, “are we practicing again today?? I want you to show me that cool wha-BAM block again!!” He jumped up and attempted to imitate Kuroo’s cool kill block.

“Shoyo, Kuro was actually just saying that he was—“ Kenma started. Hinata thought that Kenma almost looked worried about something? Kuroo cut him off before Hinata could figure it out.

“On my way to look for you Chib-chan!”

Hinata grinned at him. He loved practicing with such amazing players. He learned so much and it was a sure way to take his mind off his grumpy boyfriend for a few hours. Hopefully, by the time they met up for dinner, Kageyama would be in a less crappy mood.

“Let’s go grab something to eat and then we’ll round up the others,” Kuroo told him and Hinata nodded and ran off. Now that he knew Kuroo was coming, he should convince Tsukishima to join.

***

Extra practice was absolutely not going the way Hinata thought it would. In fact, it only reminded him about how completely useless he was trying to help Kageyama earlier that day. He was still completely useless. Tsukishima already yelled at him and Lev to be quiet.

“You’ve got a fever,” Akaashi said and Hinata’s anxiety spiked. Maybe Kageyama was sick after all. He might’ve caught whatever Kuroo had. And Hinata was such an asshole to him. He would have to apologize after they took care of the current situation.

Hinata watched helplessly as his upperclassmen slowly broke down, trying without success to think of some way to help. Akaashi and Bokuto seemed to have it covered, but Hinata was tired of feeling useless.

When Lev mentioned Kenma, Hinata was more than happy to retrieve the setter. He knew exactly where he should be too.

“Kenma!” Hinata yelled breathlessly as he entered the Nekoma sleeping quarters. He scanned the room for the familiar brown-blonde hair, ignoring the curious eyes of the other Nekoma members in the room. Kenma was nowhere to be found. He locked eyes with Inuoka who blinked at him in shock.

“Hinata? Is everything okay?” He stood up and crossed the room.

“Uh,” Hinata quieted down a little, he wasn’t stupid enough to blurt out the situation. That might only cause panic. “Kuroo-san is sick and I came to get Kenma.” Inuoka’s eyes widened.

“It hit Kuroo-san? Already? Damn,” Inuoka sighed, putting a hand on his forehead.

“What are you talking about?” Hinata asked.

“A few players from Shinzen and Ubugawa got a stomach bug. They just told Nobuyuki-san. He went to go talk with the rest of the captains and vice-captains about what to do. He took Yaku-san and they figured they’d just tell Kuroo when he got back. I guess he knows…” Inuoka explained and Hinata’s stomach dropped to his feet. Kageyama practiced with a bunch of Shinzen and Ubugawa players last night, so he most definitely was sick. Shit.

He wanted to run to find his boyfriend, but he had a job to do right now. He trusted his team to take care of things until he could find Kenma.

“Where’s Kenma?” Hinata pressed.

“He’s in the shower,” Inuoka said and Hinata cursed.

“Okay. Thanks, Inuoka!” he called as he sprinted towards the bathrooms.

Kenma was very unhappy with Hinata when he burst into the bathroom shouting his name and throwing the curtain open. After he explained the situation with Kuroo though, Kenma sighed and said he’d be right out. Hinata waited impatiently outside the bathroom for Kenma to finish. When Kenma emerged from the bathroom with his hair tied back and dripping and his Snorlax slippers adorning his feet, Hinata quickly led him to Gym Three.

“Kuroo- san! I found Kenma!” Hinata yelled as soon as they got there. Kenma immediately went over and took Akaashi’s place beside Kuroo.

Hinata watched for a little while, but when Kuroo started gagging more he remembered that his own boyfriend might be in a similar situation.

“Uh, I’m gonna—I’m gonna go,” he stuttered and ran out of the gym to find Kageyama.

He had no idea where his boyfriend might be at this point. Was he even sick? Was he angry at Hinata? If he was sick, would he still be in the gym anyway? It wouldn’t be surprising at all if he blatantly lied about being sick in order to keep practicing.

“Hinata!” Kiyoko ran up to him, “there you are. We’ve been looking everywhere for you. I ran to Gym Three earlier, but as soon as I saw the situation and that you weren’t there, I just left. Please come with me,” she said quickly and turned back the direction she came from.

“Is everything okay?” he asked. Kiyoko looking for him so urgently couldn’t be anything good. She shook her head.

“Kageyama almost passed out while he and Sugawara were practicing, but he refuses to leave the gym.” Hinata’s chest squeezed. He was right. Kageyama was sick.

“What a freaking idiot,” he said, picking up his pace a little.

When he got to the gym, Kageyama was standing on the court, swaying on his feet. Yachi was hesitantly tossing balls up for him to set. Before each one, she tried to say something about how Kageyama should sit down, but Kageyama cut her off with a glare. Asahi, Yamaguchi, and Kinnoshita were all practicing half-heartedly, keeping an eye on their stubborn setter. Noya was the only one who looked angry. Hinata imagined that he tried to get Kageyama to leave and was quickly shut down.

“Where are Daichi and Suga?” Hinata asked Kiyoko. She shrugged.

“They were called away for some captain’s meeting.” Hinata nodded.

“Shinzen and Ubugawa players have a stomach bug. It’s probably about that.” Kiyoko’s eyes widened and she shot an anxious look in Kageyama’s direction. Hinata grimaced and steeled himself.

“Hey! Bakayama!” Hinata shouted and the ball Yachi tossed fell to the ground untouched. Kageyama turned to him and Hinata gasped.

He was paler than earlier, almost ashen, and positively dripping in sweat. Hinata’s feet carried him over to his idiotic boyfriend and he immediately cupped his flushed cheeks. His fever was immediately evident. Kageyama registered the movement a little too slowly (incredibly concerning) and grabbed Hinata's wrists and weakly tried to pull his hands off his face.

“Stop. You have a fever. You need to go to bed.” Hinata said, not leaving any room for an argument.

Of course, that didn’t stop Kageyama.

“I’m fine,” he said. The crack and complete lack of bite in his voice made the statement incredibly unconvincing. Hinata pursed his lips and dropped his hands.

“Fine. Let’s do some passing drills then,” he shrugged and walked over to Yachi to get a ball.

“Hinata, I don’t know if that’s the bes--” Yachi started.

“Get a bucket and some water ready.” Hinata cut her off with a whisper. Her mouth immediately dropped into a frown, her eyes wide, but she nodded and ran to the store room.

“Fine. You suck anyway,” Kageyama muttered. He moved into position.

They started passing and things were going smoothly for the first few minutes. As time passed, however, it was more than clear that Kageyama was unwell. There was an obvious sway to his stance, and he was panting even though they’d only been at it for a few minutes. Hinata was uncomfortable with putting his boyfriend through all this, but if the idiot wasn’t going to admit he was sick, there wasn’t anything else he could do.

Without realizing it, Hinata let out his frustration on the ball and spiked it down. Kageyama jumped to try and reach it when it bounced back up, but just barely touched it. When his feet slammed back onto the floor, his legs gave out and he fell to his hands and knees. Yachi and the remaining Karasuno players gasped and tried to run to his side, but Hinata beat them to it.

“Kageyama!” Hinata ran over to him. He swiped back his sweaty hair and cringed at the heat he felt.

“That was a shit move, boke,” Kageyama wheezed.

“I didn’t mean to spike it, really, I was just so frustrated because you’re being so unnecessarily stubborn about this. You’re clearly sick, idiot.” Hinata replied. He couldn’t keep the concern out of his voice. Kageyama seemed way worse off than Kuroo.

Kageyama thought about his words for a second before he looked at the floor and nodded. Hinata sighed in relief.

“Can I take you to bed?” Kageyama met his eyes. Hinata frowned. Kageyama’s eyes were fever-bright and glassy (Hinata secretly thought it made the blue of his eyes even more beautiful, but he kept that to himself. For now, at least).

“Please,” Kageyama croaked. His bottom lip trembled and if there weren’t other people around, he would’ve kissed Kageyama’s sweaty forehead.

Instead, he stood up, extending a hand down to Kageyama. The setter took his hand and Hinata helped him stand slowly and carefully. As soon as he was upright, Hinata pulled one of Kageyama’s arms around his shoulder and wrapped his own around his boyfriend’s waist. Kageyama leaned a little too heavily on Hinata.

Hinata bit his lip. If Kageyama did catch the same bug, he needed to get him somewhere away from people sooner rather than later. It was unlikely that Kageyama would be okay spewing his guts up in front of everyone.

“Here, I’ll help,” Yamaguchi said and Hinata shook his head before he could make his way over to them.

“It’s okay. I don’t want you to catch this,” Hinata said and sent Yamaguchi a grateful smile. Yamaguchi nodded and took the bucket and water from Yachi.

“I’ll follow you. I want to find Tsukki anyway.”

They made it about 3 feet out of the gym before Kageyama pushed himself away from Hinata and careened off to the side. He put a hand on the wall and doubled over with a painful sounding wretch.

“Crap,” Hinata muttered and grabbed the bucket from Yamaguchi. He walked over to Kageyama and put it down in front of him and put a hand on his hunched back. A second later, he heaved again unsuccessfully.

“Can I do anything?” Yamaguchi asked. Hinata glanced at Kageyama’s scrunched up face and watched his throat bobbed up and down as he swallowed. He turned back to Yamaguchi and shook his head, sending him another thankful smile.

“It’s okay. I got this,” Hinata said. Yamaguchi hesitated, but nodded and placed the water bottle on the ground before turning and walking away.

“Relax, Yama,” Hinata soothed.

“Go’way,” Kageyama replied. Hinata for the umpteenth time that day, took a second to compute his boyfriend’s response.

“As if, stupid. It’s fine. It’s not like you haven’t seen me puke.”

“That’s not,” he hiccuped, “that’s not it.” Kageyama said.

Hinata stared at him for a second and tried not to be hurt by thoughts that hadn’t yet been voiced.

“...you’d rather be alone?” he asked softly. Kageyama looked up at him, his eyes big and his mouth in a tight line, but an apologetic look on his face. He nodded. Hinata tucked his lips into his mouth and took his hand off his back.

“I’ll just be over there then,” he chuckled pathetically. If Kageyama didn’t want him around, it didn’t mean that he didn’t love him or trust him, Hinata tried to remind himself. It was just a preference. This was a new situation for them as a couple and Hinata had to remember that he was still learning things about his boyfriend.

“Hina—“ Kageyama tried, but was cut off by another gag. It was wet and gurgling.

“It’s okay, Yama! I know it’s not cause you don’t love me. It’s fine. Come get me when you’re ready,” Hinata assured and walked around the corner of the gym.

He sat down against the wall and took a breath. It was stupid for him to feel so hurt. The only reason he was this upset was because they fought earlier and never really made up.

Around the corner, Kageyama gagged harshly and Hinata winced. He resisted the urge to run around the corner and help.

For the next several minutes, Hinata sat by helplessly, uselessly, and listened to Kageyama wretch and gag and hiccup and gasp unproductively.

Finally, a harsh cough brought with it the sounds of vomit hitting plastic and Hinata felt some relief on behalf of his sickly boyfriend.

From there, it was almost like someone turned on the faucet. Hinata winced everytime Kageyama heaved. He was about to run to Kageyama, whether the setter wanted that or not.

“Sh-Shoyo,” he heard Kageyama whimper and with that Hinata’s resolve to sit by patiently broke and he got up and sprinted the short distance back to his boyfriend.

Kageyama was squatting with the bucket between his legs and his head in his hands, panting.

“Yama,” Hinata said at the same time that his heart broke. He knelt by Kageyama.

“Hey, I’m here. What do you need? Want me to rub your back? Want some water? I can tie back your hair or —“

“Sho, please,” Kageyama breathed. He looked at Hinata with the biggest, saddest, wettest eyes and the cutest, smallest, most adorably pitiful frown.

“Please jus’ shuddup ‘n hold m’hand,” he said and held out a hand. Hinata gladly took it and squeezed. Kageyama’s shoulders relaxed briefly before jumping back up by his ears when he heaved.

Hinata sat by quietly while Kageyama continued to throw up seemingly everything he’s ever eaten. He wanted to do more, but didn’t want to overstep any boundaries and make Kageyama uncomfortable. Just being able to offer even the most minute bit of comfort to Kageyama made him less anxious. He hoped Kageyama felt the same way.

Kageyama spit in the bucket and breathed heavily.

“Water?” He choked. Hinata nodded eagerly and handed him the water Yachi brought him. Kageyama used it to rinse his mouth out first and then fell onto his butt and took a few more sips, opting to sit cross-legged against the gym wall.

Hinata fiddled with his fingers, trying to figure out what to do with them now that he wasn’t holding Kageyama’s hand anymore. He decided to move the bucket away and await further instruction.

Kageyama looked...bad. And it made Hinata’s whole body twitch. He’d never seen Kageyama like this, weak and sweaty and vulnerable. On the one hand, he was glad that Kageyama trusted him. On the other, it hurt his chest to see the guy he loved in such a state.

A quiet sob broke him out of his thoughts and his head shot up to look at Kageyama.

“Yama?”

Kageyama shook his head and brought his arms up to cover his face. Hinata crawled over to him and waited for him to calm down.

“I’m sorry, Hinata,” he whimpered behind his arms. Hinata’s face softened.

“It’s alright.”

“No,” Kageyama said quickly, dropping his arms and meeting Hinata’s eyes. He was flushed, pale and sweaty, his hair matted and sticking up in all directions. Hinata smiled at him sympathetically.

“It’s not alright, Hinata. I-I was such an ass-asshole,” he wheezed between sobs. Hinata bit his lip.

“And you were on-only trying to h-help, and I was so mean!” He cried, his chest heaving. “You should break up with me.” Hinata furrowed his eyebrows and widened his eyes. How did he fall for such a freaking drama Queen?

He threw his head back and sighed, “Kageyama.”

“Don’t forgive me, Hinata! You’re not clingy! I’m sorry,” the setter continued to cry. His raspy breaths and choked sobs were quickly devolving. Hinata could see where this was going. He felt bad because Kageyama was probably way too out of it to realize that he was working himself up.

“Yama, please listen to me for a second you big idiot,” Hinata tried again. Kageyama continued to sob, hiccups sprinkling themselves in now.

Hinata needed to calm him down. Could he touch him now? He wasn’t sure. He didn’t want to make Kageyama more uncomfortable.

Kageyama made up Hinata’s mind for him when he lurched forward with a dry heave. He planted a hand on the ground in front of him but his whole arm was trembling. Hinata wrapped his arm around Kageyama’s heaving chest quickly to keep him upright.

“Tobio, calm down. Breathe,” Hinata soothed. Even he was surprised, but very proud, at how calmly he was handling everything. He’d brag to Kageyama about it when he was feeling better.

Kageyama shook his head quickly, eyes squeezed shut and dry heaved again.

“There’s nothing left, Yama,” Hinata tried to reason. He used his free hand to rub gently between Kageyama’s shoulder blades.

Kageyama grabbed Hinata’s arm around his chest and squeezed. His body continued to betray him and after a few more heave, he choked on a small stream of bile onto his legs.

Hinata cursed and pulled Kageyama up to a standing position. It only served to aggravate his stomach more and he belched up a larger wave. At least this time he didn’t get it on himself.

He kept an arm firmly across Kageyama’s chest and the setter leaned heavily into Hinata. It was concerning to say the least. His throat gurgled before more bile spilled from his mouth.

“Kageyama, hey. Breathe,” Hinata said more urgently.

“Hinata!” Suga called and Hinata’s head snapped towards his upperclassmen. Suga was jogging towards them with a few medical masks in hand.

“Shit, it hit him hard, huh?” He winced.

“Yeah,” Hinata replied with a grimace. Kageyama gasped. He squeezed his eyes shut and spit before moaning pitifully.

Hinata, getting past his own disgust, used the end of his own gosh dang shirt and wiped off Kageyama’s mouth. His boyfriend’s lip trembled when he made eye contact with him and Hinata’s mouth quirked up in sympathy.

“You’re okay,” he said. Kageyama turned and wrapped his arms around Hinata’s head and collapsed onto him in a heavy hug. On instinct, Hinata’s arms snaked around Kageyama’s waist.

Hinata managed to bring his face out of Kageyama’s chest and found Suga again. The older setter had an eyebrow raised and subtle smirk on his lips.

“Seems you guys made up,” he said, crossing his arms.

“Yeah,” Hinata blushed, “is there somewhere he can rest?” Suga chuckled.

“Yeah. Come on. They’ve set up a room for the fallen,” he joked. “Do you need help?”

“Uh,” he glanced at the giant buried in his neck and smiled softly.

“Nah. I got it. Just lead the way.” He said and maneuvered Kageyama onto his back.

“Try to keep your insides inside for a bit, okay, Bakageyama?” Hinata teased. Kageyama just groaned and nuzzled further into Hinata’s neck.

Suga covered his own face with a medical mask before handing one to Hinata. Then he led them to a classroom set up for the sickies. While they were walking, Kageyama whispered repeated and delirious apologies to Hinata.

“Hey, it’s fine,” Hinata insisted after a bit, “I was a jerk too. I’m sorry. I just wanted to help. It was stupid of me to think I could fix everything if you just told me what was wrong.”

“I should’ve just told you,” Kageyama replied quietly.

“Yeah probably,” Hinata shrugged as best he could, “but this is new for us. We’ll figure it out.”

“Still. I was so mean,” Kageyama mumbled into Hinata’s neck.

“I’m not mad,” Hinata reassured. He looked ahead at Suga who was very obviously trying not to listen.

“You should be.”

“You’re sick, Yama. It’s no surprise that you’re grumpier than usual. I’m just grateful you’re letting me help you now.”

“I don’t want anyone else to help me,” Kageyama admitted. Hinata’s chest warmed.

“It’s you and me, then.” He smiled. Kageyama nodded.

When they finally made it to the Designated Sick Room, Suga left the room to tell Daichi what was going on while Hinata took Kageyama to a corner futon away from the majority of the others.

“Alright, I’ll come check on you in a bit, okay?” He said once he was satisfied that Kageyama was sufficiently comfortable. Kageyama nodded and turned onto his side and shivered. Hinata frowned. He didn’t want to leave his boyfriend, but he didn’t want to stay in that nasty, germ-filled room longer than necessary.

He turned to leave, resisting the urge to give Kageyama a quick kiss. Right before he stepped out of the room, Suga stopped him with a hand in his face.

“Where do you think you’re going?” He asked, one hand still up to stop Hinata and the other on his cocked hip.

Hinata raised an eyebrow and said, “I’m going back to practice?”

“As if,” Suga scoffed before noticing Hinata’s confusion at the response.

“Hinata,” he sighed and turned away, “listen,” he met Hinata’s eyes, “we were trying to wait for you guys to be comfortable enough to tell us yourselves, but we all know you and Kageyama are dating.”

Hinata blinked up at him. Suga’s hidden meaning was not immediately apparent to him, but eventually he realized what his upperclassman was implying and he felt his cheeks heat up in embarrassment.

“What— no— I mean we don’t— I don’t—“

“Cut the crap, Hinata,” Suga chuckled, a crooked smile and a raised eyebrow telling the middle blocker that there was no getting out of this one. He immediately deflated and dropped his head and shoulders with an exasperated sigh.

“How’d you guys find out?”

“For real?? It’s not like you guys were subtle at all!” Suga laughed fully this time. “You’ve been fighting less and you stare at each other all the time. Also, take it from me, the storage closets are not as private as you may think.”

Hinata flushed in embarrassment again. No way could he meet Suga’s eyes right now.

“Now. Get back in there. If Kageyama is sick, there’s no way you’re not at least carrying his germs.” Suga pushed Hinata gently back into the Sick Room, despite his many sputtering attempts at protesting.

Kageyama’s bleary eyes peeked up at Hinata in confusion when he unceremoniously plopped down beside his sick boyfriends. He huffed sharply and crossed his arms, pouting.

“What are you doing? You shouldn’t be in here. You’ll get sick,” he mumbled groggily. Hinata let out an exasperated sigh.

“Apparently,” he drawled out, “we aren’t as good at hiding as we thought so there’s ‘no way’ I’m not carrying your germs. Suga’s making me stay here.”

“Wha—“ Kageyama’s eyebrows squished together cutely while his foggy brain tried to interpret what Hinata said. As soon as he did, his already flushed cheeks deepened in color before he quickly buried his face in his pillow.

“Stupid, Shoyo,” came the muffled insult, “you’re too obnoxious.”

“Me?” Hinata gasped, a hand flying to his chest and his eyes widening. “You’re the one that insists we make out in the storage closet!” Kageyama turned his head and frowned up at Hinata.

“I’m sorry,” he croaked, “I just really like you. Please don’t yell at me. I don’t feel good.” Hinata’s heart constricted from the sheer adorableness behind Kageyama’s wide glassy eyes and tiny little pout.

“Gah,” he squeezed his eyes shut and grasped at his chest. “You’re so freaking cute, Yamayama. I’m sorry! You’re right! It’s my fault.” To show his remorse, Hinata flopped onto his boyfriend and snuggled into him.

“Ah! Shoyo, stop! We’re in public, dumbass,” Kageyama cried through giggles. Hinata laughed and peered up at Kageyama with a smile. He pecked his flushed cheek and sat up.

“Guess since everyone knows, you’re really stuck with me, Yama,” he sing-songed. Kageyama smiled up at him softly.

“Good. Now let me sleep.” He rolled over and Hinata settled himself against the wall beside his head.

“Sure. I’ll be here in case you need to puke again. Let me know if you feel bad and I can get you some medicine or some water. Or hey! If you feel up to munching on something, I can run to the vending machines and—“

“Shoyo?”

“Hmmm?”

“Please just shut up and hold my hand.” Kageyama snaked one hand out from under his blanket and Hinata took it in his own as a smile tugged at his cheeks.

[i-write-boop-spoops]

what pokemon games have you played? (Emerald and Platinum are best imo.)

Yall better buckle up, this is basically the history of me and Pokemon istg

In order, here are the games I’ve played: Platinum, X, Alpha Sapphire, Sun, Let’s Go Eevee, Shield and Brilliant Diamond.

As you can see, I totally skipped the GB/GBA generation, even if we did have an advance spinning about at home. I was probably a bit too young then for Pokemon anyways, so the DS was my first proper taste of Pokemon. I spent a lot of time in Platinum, even if my brother completed the story for me. Much nostalgia.

Noticeably, I haven’t played any Gen 2 (original or remakes) or Gen 5, because I was a dumb kid and never got them/borrowed my brother’s copies of them. I am highkey considering playing them someday though, since they’re both highly regarded.

How do I write for Silver or N since I haven’t played their games? I’ve absorbed a lot of N through other people, breakdowns, and his anime appearances, and for Silver, I basically write him as Felix from fire emblem because they are THE SAME GUY basically and his generations episode is so good.

Why do I write for them? 12 y/o me stumbled on fanart and fanfic of them on Deviantart and I’ve never been the same.

X was what really got me into Pokemon. I remember giving money to my older cousin to buy me a 2DS and X with an employee discount at the shop he worked at. I loved it so much! Even if my team was shit, I had such a good time. I had such a huge crush on Calem, but obviously my tastes have matured and I’m a full on Sycamore stan now.

I wanna say I got Alpha Sapphire in 2015, and then I think I got stuck in Meteor Falls looking for the Dreamboat during the delta episode, and I didn’t finish it until either 2018/2019, and it was so good that I immediately replayed it. Steven might be my favourite Pokemon character, I swear it was love at first sight. Ugh, I wanna play it again, and I wanna give Steven a kiss.

SU/MO were the first Pokemon games I was actively hyped for. I watched every trailer, and I was big into a lot of Poketubers at the time (specifically Birdkeeper Toby). I got Sun for Christmas 2016, and played it for an hour and didn’t pick it up until 2019.

Some context is, my eyesight is extremely bad, reading small font is super hard for me and doing it for a long time really hurts. It’s a progressive condition, so I was able to fairly easily play Pokemon on the DS/3DS when I was a kid, but by that time, my sight could not handle Sun’s tiny text.

When I got my switch I got it with Let’s go Eeevee, and it was just wholesome and fun. I did not like the Go-style catching mechanic BUT my Eeevee was a dote and it was nice to see where it all started. Also I could play it on the TV, with the switch’s zoom if I needed, so it was much nicer on my peepers

Luckily, in 2019, I got my hands on a 3DS XL and with a 4x magnifying glass, I finally was able to play Sun and I loved it. First off, it has Togedemaru, the best Pokémon, and secondly the region is so FUCKING GORGEOUS! And I’m a 2015 tumblr bitch, I love galaxy/space shit (another reason why I love ORAS actually). And the characters were just great (stan Lillie for clear skin) and obviously we got big bug daddy Guzma who I owe most of my notes too lol

So yeah I got Shield at the end of that year, loved it (specifically Leon, I am so horny for that man oml). I didn’t care about the national dex really, but yeah that game has some story problems, and the areas aren’t super flushed out. I love the Isle of Armour and the Crown tundra though. I will also protect all the chatacters with my life.

Most recently I played Brilliant Diamond, and by most recently I mean literally today. I love revisiting Sinnoh but this game… is a choice…

Anyways anon, thank you for this question, sorry for all this info lol.

[scottfuckingreed]

It’s a Pogue Thing - Part Two

This is a JJ Maybank story :)

Requested

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Warnings!: swearing and it gets sexual (SMUT)

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“That’s disgusting,” Ki grunts as we watch JJ spit into an impressively far distance. Today we sailed to a small piece of island in the middle of the ocean. Between the blue sky, and the slightly green water it’s quite beautiful. Not a cloud in sight either, which is a somewhat odd thing for the Outer Banks. Some would call it peaceful, except we seem to hang around with complete animals. The JJ smirk spreads across his face. “You know you love it,” he winks. With a laugh, I sigh. “That’s even worse.”

You’d think it was awkward. I mean, how can you go from being friends, to sleeping together, back to normal again? I don’t know. Over the past week it’s been indifferent. Sure, it was a bit weird the first day. Maybe even the second. I’m still in shock that it happened. Once we cleaned up my house after the party, the ice was pretty much broken. We know where we stand with each other.

“Are you seeing Sarah today?” I ask John B. I notice Kiara roll her eyes so I flash her an ‘I’m sorry for bringing it up’ look. He clears his throat. “No... why would I be seeing Sarah today?” His tone comes off slightly defensive. I imagine it’s because Ki’s here, and he once had a thing for her? Maybe he still does. “I don’t know. Was she any help at the party?” We haven’t spoken much about the party; any of us. I, for one, am a bit relieved. “A little, but Topper started following us around,” of course. I’m not sure if she has him on a leash, or the other way around. “Still a good party though,” he nudged. If he thinks that’ll get me to throw another one, he can think again. “Thank JJ, I didn’t even wanna be there,” I laugh jokingly. “You can definitely thank me, you seemed like you had a good time in the end,” his words send shivers down my spine. I’m thankful for the concealer on my face as I feel my cheeks redden at his husky voice. “I don’t know, maybe it was the alcohol,” my head turns to his. “Maybe.”

We sail straight back to John B’s house. “You guy’s can crash here if you’d like,” he shrugs. With his dad gone, it’s a pretty empty house. I know we all fantasise about a parent-free life sometimes, but I can’t actually imagine the feeling of someone never coming home. “I’ve actually gotta go. My mum’s cooking dinner tonight... you guys hungry?” I ask. John B sends a warm smile my way. “Thanks, but I got left over pizza inside.” “Nice,” I laugh. I shift my eyes over to Kiara. “I think I’ll stay and help John B tidy up a bit.” If you visualise a teenage boy’s room, his entire house looks like that 24/7. Beer bottles, left over takeaway boxes, smelly ass clothing thrown around. “Suit yourselves.” I lock eyes with Pope, and I already know the answer. “You know my dad’ll kill me if I don’t get my ass home and check in.” A smile spreads across JJ’s face. “I’m not stupid enough to turn down mama Y/L/N’s cooking,” he chuckles.

As soon as we walk through my front door, my mum is all over JJ. She loves him. Usually the parents despise the boys like him. He’s the bad boy! But no. She still sees him as this cute, cheeky boy. “Mama Y/L/N! Long time no see,” JJ exclaims with a cute smile on his face, bringing my mum in for a hug. She squeezes him back in a tight embrace. “It’s been too long, how are you?!”

The conversation flows smoothly throughout dinner. It’s actually nice, not that I’d ever tell my mum that. She needs to think I’m embarrassed, when in reality I love that it’s so chill. “Did you guys enjoy the party the other night?” My mum asks as if it hasn’t been playing on her mind throughout the entirety of dinner. She’s asked me, but I won’t tell her anything. So, of course she asks JJ; he will answer. “Oh it was great! Y/N and I had a great time!” He smiles greatly. In a quick moment that my mum isn’t looking his way, he winks subtly at me. “Really? She hasn’t said much about it.” This is one of those moments where you wish you could send a telepathic message to someone. It would scream ‘stop before it’s too late’! “It’s probably because Rafe turned up.” There it is. I immediately just want to shrivel up and crawl away. My mum’s eyes widen. “Shit, I hate that guy.” JJ sends an agreeing nod. At least we’re all on the same page here. Like with other things, I’ve kept Rafe as much to myself as I possibly can from my mum. She knows he was nasty, but not in much detail. She knows he hurt me, but not in any specific way. In a very vague way, she knows everything she needs to. Just to hate him. “He’s a dick.” “This is why I like you JJ,” my mum pauses. Her face as she processes her possible next words. I raise my eyes brows in a warning manner.

After dinner, JJ offered to help my mum clean up. You may think it’s cute, but I know this boy’s games. He can’t fool me. “Are you staying to watch a movie JJ?” She asks, passing the boy a plate to dry. Before he can answer, I interrupt. “Can you give us a second actually, please?” I smile innocently towards her. Her eyes widen and she wiggles her eyebrows at me. “Sure.”

“What are you playing at?” I giggle. Recently, although I hate to admit it, JJ’s company has honestly been what I’m craving. Somehow a he’s so predictable, yet he surprises me every time. “I’m not doing anything Y/N, you’re reading into things.” He dries his last plate and puts the pile into a cupboard. Of course he knows exactly where they go. “You’re not staying for the movie,” I warn him. Even with my mum there, I don’t trust him. I don’t even trust myself. “What are you watching?” He asks. “I don’t know. I think my mum was on about watching ‘Now You See Me’ or something.” His face lights up. “Come on Y/N! I love that one.” I shake my head. I don’t want to want him here. “Please,” he sticks his bottom lip out. Because of my lack of reaction, he brings his head closer. He was so close that I could feel his breath on my face. A feeling that took me straight back to the party. A moment that I am trying so hard to not think about.

Unfortunately JJ has something about him. He’s painfully hard to say no to a lot of the time. So, here he is, helping bring down some blankets from upstairs. Despite the fact that our friendship should be ruined at this point. I’m starting to think that this may just be an exception. Why should it ruin everything? It was nothing. Before going back downstairs, I change into an oversized hoodie and some shorts.

My mum makes popcorn whilst we get things set up. Some soft blankets and even comfier pillows are arranged on the couch. I sit myself in the middle, with JJ on my right and my mum on my left. A part of me wanted to have my mum split us up, but that would’ve just looked strange. My eyes light up when I catch a glimpse of the popcorn bowl. “Let’s get started then.”

As the movie starts, I begin to get more excited. “I’m excited,” I smile massively. The more I think about it, the more hyped up I get. “I didn’t know this was your sort of thing,” JJ mutters with a smirk. Of course it’s a great movie, but that’s not what it is. “I watch it for the plot,” I smirk back. The plot being Dave Franco and Jesse Eisenberg. I express my love for the two beauties, only for JJ to simply state “I am so much better looking than them.” I snort at his words. “Whatever.”

20 or so minutes go by. My mum has already started nodding off, and I am beginning to get myself comfy. Without thinking, I nudge myself a bit closer to JJ. I didn’t even have to look at him to notice the growing smirk. The best thing, I thought, was to pretend I didn’t notice what I was doing. I bring my feet up, and lean them against his leg. A small noise exits JJ’s mouth, which sounded like a small chuckle. “Sorry I-” I start. My words pause at the touch of JJ’s fingertips. Even before they touched my bare thigh, I could feel their presence. “JJ,” instead of being a warning, my voice let’s put a wobbled whisper. “It’s fine,” he presses his lips together in a smile. I couldn’t tell his to move his hand away. I didn’t want him to. So I let him sandwich his hand between my thighs.

His hand, large and warm, sat nicely. It felt like an average thing. Every now and then he gently squeezed against my bare skin. Whirlpools. That’s the only way I can describe the way my stomach flipped. I thought, stupidly, that with my mum inches away it would turn everything off. Of course, that is not the case. JJ tries to be slick as he moves his hand further up my thigh. The first time, I do nothing. I’m not sure what to do. But the second, I cup my hand over his. Just as I’m about to tell him off in a whisper, my mum yawns. My heart jumps. “Shit guys, I should probably go to bed,” she stands and stretches. I try and make it look like JJ and I aren’t sitting so close. “You can stay over though JJ, finish the movie.”

My mum wanders out the room. We’re silent as we hear her footsteps all the way upstairs. Until her bedroom door shuts. “You’re not sleeping over,” I try not to smile as I say those words. The truth is, these little flirting games, send rushes through my body. Just like shockwaves. Now we’ve acted on it and I’m not sure how to resist my current urges. “Sure,” and he slides his hand up a bit higher. I grunt, accidentally making it sound slightly like a moan. Oops. That’s embarrassing. “I- uh- we-,” There’s no getting out of this one. I have no choice but to stop myself from uttering another word. I cannot even find the words to sort into a fully functioning sentence. The tension in the air was thick. So thick you would struggle to cut it with any knife; it would simply be too blunt. There were seconds of silence that just dragged on too long. As the tips of his fingers on his right hand trace along my jaw, guiding my head to turn to face him, I find myself lusting for him. “Give in to me Y/N.” Some things are just too hard to resist. Especially when it’s purely sexual. It’s as if my silence screamed for him to continue. Maybe it was radiating through my body. Even if I did speak, I couldn’t hear myself. The only noise was the dangerously loud thumping of my heart as his fingers continued on the trail. My heat was throbbing. He isn’t even doing anything. At this point, probably doesn’t need to. Am I wrong if I just let him? It feels that if I give in, I’m not only betraying the other Pogues, but maybe even myself. This was the deal. Then again, a promise that I made years ago. I was younger then. I’ve changed since then. I don’t care about that shit anymore.

That’s it. I start leaning in. To feel my lips against his, and finally give in to him. Then...

“Are you fucking kidding me?” He grunts, rolling his eyes back into his head as his phone goes off. Facetime. My body leans back in a mix of defeat and relief. I rub my eyes and my face, and hear the sound of JJ answering. “What’s up?” I pretend to shuffle up to JJ, although our legs were still touching anyway. “You’re interrupting-” “The movie,” I rush, feeling the need to cut JJ’s sentence off. “So you don’t wanna come over?” Ki erupts from the background. With a piece of pizza in each of their hands, I realize I do. Being with them, and their cock-blocking asses sounds perfect. A glace comes from the boy next to me. His eyes screamed no. Every part of my body agreed with him. My brain, however, disagreed. “Sure.” His eyes widen. Another eye roll. “We’ll be there in 30.” And he hangs up.

“Why do we need 30 minutes?” I laugh, standing up and gently folding the blanket poorly. I turn down the tv before turning it off. Like a child, I notice JJ with a rather grumpy look on his face. “Come on, you’re not that upset are you?” I ask, trying to hold in my laughter. “I’m pretty pissed Y/N I’m not gonna lie,” he says with a half smile creeping. “We still have time... 30 minutes to be exact...” His hand reaches over to my arm. His soft fingertips slide from my elbow, down to my hand. With that comes a pull. I land perfectly on his lap. A leg either side of his. I try and contain my thoughts. I cannot control my hands as they sit on his face. It’s hard to keep my head straight when JJ’s hands run up and down my thighs. All I can think about is the thin clothing between our crotches. So little, yet way too much. I close my eyes for a second. Just to absorb the sensation. Then it’s time for reality. “Not now.” I whisper. A heavy breath leaves him. “Fine, but you owe me.” As much as I’d love to deny it, it’s promise I’m more than willing to keep. I pull my head away from his, presenting my pinky finger to him. A smile, isn’t cute to me at all, gleams; it radiates. So much so that its contagious. Our pinky’s lock. “Yeah?” The blend of his smile and tone screams extreme excitement. “Cross my heart Maybank.”

John B’s house was now clean. I don’t think I’ve seen for the floor for months. Although I don’t blame him for the way he’s lived for the past few months, It was beginning to get a bit much. He very persistent. I know he’s still waiting for his father to come home. That being said, Kiara clearly was the one who cleaned. “Wow, the shitty smell has faded,” I hit JJ as those words fall from his mouth. That boy has zero filter. “It looks great, I’d love to know how much you helped though Johnny,” I assure him with a smirk, nudging John B on the shoulder. 

“So, what are we doing?” I ask. As soon as the words left my mouth, I realised that I probably didn’t want to know. John B says nothing, just simply forced a smile. Jesus Christ. Instead I look at Kiara. “He said Sarah’s information gave a lead. He wants us to follow it.” I look down at my outfit. I still have my fucking nightwear on. I should’ve known. I’m the stupid one here. Damn. I actually thought we would maybe just sleep for once. 

With John B in the drivers seat and Kiara in the passenger, it left Pope, JJ and I in the back. I found myself staring at the stars flying past as we drove. The Outer Banks is a totally different place at night. It’s beautiful. It’s also scarier and creepier, but we cross those bridges when we get to them. “Hey,” JJ nudges me gently with a whisper. “You alright?” I nod slowly. I wouldn’t say this to John B, but honestly it’s worrying. This whole thing has become an obsession. I know it’s his dad, and I know he misses him like crazy, but is there really a chance he’s alive? And why has this whole thing been so mysterious and chaotic? “What’s up with you two?” It’s only when I hear Pope’s voice that I remember that we’re back as a group right now. “Are you feeling left out?” Is JJ’s response. I try and keep my smile contained. He just has this tone, and facial expression, where you can’t take him seriously. “I didn’t know you felt that wa-” 

“What the fuck John B?” Kiara snaps in an angry mumble. Before the van even stops Ki opens the door and hops out. We haven’t been driving for long, so we can’t be far. Kiara, with an extremely miserable face, hops into the back with the rest of us. I go to ask, but I see Sarah Cameron climb into the front passenger seat. What is this boy playing at? “Oh shit,” I whisper in JJ’s direction. A slight chuckle comes out, purely amazed at the balls on this boy. “Hi guy’s!” Sarah smiles enthusiastically. I feel somewhat obligated to respond. As I’ve mentioned previously, I’ve never had a massive problem with her. “Hey Sarah.” I feel bad for both sides. John B shouldn’t put Kiara into these situations as he knows she doesn’t like her. Then again, I think Ki needs to not be so rude sometimes. Right now, that’s not going to happen. Might as well just enjoy the awkward car journey. 

Sarah and John B giggle away in the front as if they have been life long friends. The rest of us, not including Kiara, sent awkward eyes each other’s ways. Ki sulked silently. So I go back to staring outside. It’s hard not to imagine what it would be like to be free. The Outer Banks area is all I know. My family may ‘have money’, but our trips have always been within an hour’s drive. There’s a world beyond this. There is so much more to see and explore. Maybe that’s why we’re all so hung up on these mini impossible adventures. We’re craving something more.

John B’s plan, he said, was simple. A clue has led us to an area of green. “There has to be something here. We’re close. I can feel it,” his words sound hopeful, despite the wobbly tone to his voice. “Can’t we do this in the morning? We’re not going to find anything in the pitch black,” Pope was right. But John’s desperate. I would be too. “We’ll just have a quick look around,” he promises. He wanders to the back of the van, and takes out some torches. “I think we should split up into three pairs,” when Sarah speaks, I can automatically feel the rage coming off of Kiara. With an excessive eye roll, she might as well have just said something. Everyone else must’ve seen it, but it get’s ignored. Probably best not to fight in the darkness, in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by trees. I send a quick smile Sarah’s way. “Okay. So... I’ll go with Sarah. You and JJ, and Kiara and Pope.” 

“Don’t look so smug,” I warn the smirking JJ as we separate from the others in our direction. It’s pretty typical for us to be paired, but we also do make the best team. With a torch, I look around as if I know what I’m looking for. “This is going to be impossible,” I grunt already in defeat. I really want to help John B, but I don’t even think he’s helping himself at this point. How long is this going to go on for? “Do you think he’s alive?” JJ asks in a whisper. It’s a question, I think, we’ve all been too afraid to ask. John’s answer is simple. We wouldn’t be searching for clues in the middle of the night if he didn’t. I hesitate. As I shake my head, my heart breaks a little. I wish I did. It would make things a little easier. “Me neither.”

Although being surrounded by trees at night is usually the scene of a horror movie, it’s rather beautiful. Scary, but beautiful. Around 15 minutes has passed since we split from the others and no one has found anything; I assume anyway. There is zero service on our phones, so really we have no idea, but my gut is telling me that there’s nothing to find. “I spy with my little eye, something beginning with G,” I smile. For about 5 minutes, we’ve been playing I-Spy. Perhaps at the hope of us ‘spying’ something we usually wouldn’t spot. Unfortunately, that has not been the case. I’ve been the one annoyingly asking, and he’s just been playing along to humor me. “I swear to god Y/N if it’s grass...” He warns. Like I said, we’ve seen nothing but the wilderness. “My turn.” 

As someone who pretty much refused to play, I was interested to see what better he could do. There’s nothing to see. “I spy something beginning Y.” Okay. I immediately start looking around, into the darkness. This is only I-Spy, but I need to win. JJ is one cocky mother fucker. I turn to him and frown. “Y? You know you have to actually be able to see this thing right?” I finish my sentence. Two hands go to my waist, guiding me backwards. “It was “You up against a tree, naked.” And I was. Well, I was pressed against the tree. My heartbeat went from a normal pace, to almost having a sudden heart attack in seconds. I open my mouth to speak, but no words seem to come. What is wrong with me? “I make you speechless,” he leans down to my ear and whispers. I still say nothing. As I finally feel words ready to be released, I get interrupted. And no, not by JJ. 

We walk back to the van in silence. Trying to hold everything in, I restrain my need to smile and let out a giggle. I’m thankful to see the others. “How did the searching go?” John B asks as we finally become a group again. “We didn’t find anything,” A big part of me wished we would’ve found something. Not that me and JJ were properly looking, but it would’ve been nice to come back with some hope. “I’m sorry guys. We should’ve waited until the morning to look around,” Unsure if anyone else saw what I did, I glance around. Sarah - only for a second - nudged her hand against him. I can’t help but find it cute. 

Once we dropped Sarah and Pope home, we all went back to John B’s as planned. “You two can take the bed,” he, the gentleman he is, gestures towards the bedroom. John B’s dad’s room is locked. “I don’t mind sleeping-” “Just take the bed,” his voice, which was quite assertive, was joined by a smile. Without even thinking, I wrap my arms around John. “We will find something,” I assure him. He need to believe it, whether I do or not. I kiss him on the cheek. “I love you John.” In true JJ fashion, he joins in on the hug. “Wow I love you guy’s too.” “Hey! I wanna join,” I chuckle as Kiara swerves herself into the huddle. “Okay, that’s enough!”

So I lay there; just staring at the ceiling. Kiara is already asleep. I’m jealous. I’ve tried. It’s hard to sleep with all these thoughts going through my head. There’s too much going on. 

‘Are you awake?’ I text JJ. Within seconds I get a reply.

‘Do you need some company ;)’ I roll my eyes, more at the fact that he knows I do. 

‘You gotta get your mind out the gutter ;)’

My stomach turns at the response. I read it over and over, just to get it to stick. The picture those words paint in my head should be illegal. Words like that should be a crime. I’ll just read it once more.

‘I’d rather have my head between your legs’.

How does he expect me to sleep after that? I try and keep my eyes closed, but the only way they do is if I squeeze them shut. I hear quiet footsteps. When I let my eyes go, I see JJ tip-toeing into the bedroom.  My body sits itself up. “What are you doing?” I ask with haste. His face becomes clearer as he gets closer. “Didn’t you get my text?” He smirks, making my stomach flip just like a gymnast on a trampoline. I refuse stay speechless like earlier. He does not have this affect on me or my body. “Yeah but-” “It’ll help you sleep,” He shrugs, lifting the blanket slightly. “JJ.” I whisper, stopping as soon as an index finger starts trailing up my leg. I want to resist. I’m sure I can. It would be so much easier if I actually wanted to. He gets closer to the top of my thigh. I start asking myself, what if I just let it happen? Just one more time? It can’t hurt. “Y/N.” I was so caught up in my thoughts, I didn’t notice how close JJ’s head was to mine. When our eyes locked, I knew; I knew there was only one way this was going to go. 

I pull his lips down onto mine. I hate admit it, but the main thing that came to mind was ‘finally’. JJ doesn’t hesitate to start lining kisses from my lips down to my neck. Forgetting where I am, more importantly forgetting the fact that Kiara was inches away, I let out a slight moan. I immediately cover my lips. He lets out a deep but quiet laugh. “Shit,” I feel my cheeks begin to redden, and I’m instantly thankful for it being dark. “I have that affect on people,” shaking my head, I push him gently. “Yeah yeah.”

I hardly realized at first, but I was pushing his head lower. If I’m being honest, I was getting desperate now. I need him. Now. The tips of his fingers hook around the outsides of my shorts, smoothly down my thighs in the process. He didn’t hesitate removing my underwear quickly after, placing it next to the bed on the floor. 

A soft kiss gets placed on the inside of my thigh. I was already wet. Possibly the worst thing would be for him to know that he now has this hold over my body. A temporary hold. It won’t last. Another kiss, closer to my heat now. I wished to shout at him. He’s a teasing asshole. One more, the last one, gently exactly where I desired him. “Fuck,” he whispers, so attractively. His hand grips both of my thighs, pulling me closer to him. He attaches his lips to my throbbing heat. A deep breath exits my mouth. My hand goes straight to his hair, scrunching my fingers and pulling. Every fiber of my being wanted to moan. The pleasure shooting through my body was immense. As his tongue swirls with skill, he sends my body into a growing frenzy. Perhaps it’s the build up. Whatever it is, it feels amazing. His tongue starts concentrating mainly on my clit. Between every suck, every nibble, my stomach started building a tight knot already. My thighs clamp around his head, which he opens back up without interrupting his work. If I’d have known how good he was at this, maybe I would’ve given in a little sooner. “Oh my,” I whisper as quietly as I can. My breaths were loud enough. His arms hook a tighter hold on my thighs to keep my in place, as my body moving uncontrollably. I was so close. I knew he could feel it too. The knot begins to tighten, excitement growing more and more. And I let go, bringing a release that - although was only growing for a day - was much needed. I press my mouth against my arm to contain the majority of my moan. He gracefully lets me ride out my high, until I’m even more of a heavy-breathing mess beneath him. 

He unhooks himself. I can’t help but smile massively at him as his face comes into view. “Don’t,” I stop his words with a whisper. His eyebrows raise. I do wish he wouldn’t always have that fuckboy smile on his face. “Go back to the couch,” I nudge him on the shoulder. As quietly as he can, he gets up off the bed. He comes close to my ear once more. “Bet you can sleep now.” 

And I did.

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@nevinna

If you are interested, here’s the link to Part Three :)

[neutron-stars-collision]

The Art of Inversion

Neil x Reader 

Chapter 2 - ‘You’re inverted, the world is not’

Previous Chapter - The Life Changing Offer 

Summary: Neil leads you into the world of inversion and sometimes it might be a little bit too much to take in...

Warnings: Curse words. I’ve decided to bring up rating to T (just to be safe).

Author’s Notes: This came out incredibly long so sorry for that. Hope you enjoy and feedback is always welcomed! Thanks to my fellow Neil enthusiasts for inspiration and hype, you know who you are <3 

You have been following Neil through the crowded streets of London City almost breathlessly. He was walking fast and the shoes you chose were far from comfortable. Neither of you have spoken a word for the last fifteen minutes and you began to wonder whether this was a good decision. After all you have agreed to be lead to some obscure destination by a perfect stranger and did not even know his full name. But before you could voice any of those concerns, he has stopped in front of a grey building with a rusted metal door. He held them open, motioning for you to come in. Inside there was a darkened stairwell and an antiquated lift. As the door closed with a creak the only thought you had was that you were about to be killed. You turned to Neil with an arched eyebrow. The flashing lightbulb above made the shadows on his face stand out and drowned the blue of his eyes. You could only see the outline of his strong jaw and cheekbones. He was looking at you as well with that thoughtful gaze again. After a beat he spoke:

“Don’t worry you aren’t going to be murdered” the hint of smile was playing upon his lips “I have parked the car here” he explained and continued down the staircase not waiting for you.

You rolled your eyes and followed. His enigmatic attitude was starting to annoy you. But then all you could do was hope that you will receive some answers soon.

You found him waiting by a black BMW series 7. He was looking at you expectantly as though he was anticipating your reaction.

What did they use to say about not getting into cars with strangers?, you shook your head slightly.

“I really don’t have a choice but to get in the car, do I?” you asked rhetorically while contemplating the absurdity of the situation you got yourself into.

He flashed you that sly grin again and just got into the driver seat.

Lord help me, you thought while joining on the passenger side.

You scanned the inside of the car with interest.

Tenet certainly isn’t on the budget, you noted while taking in the complex displays on the dashboard and the touch screen.

Neil started up the engine and soon you had left the underground parking. You tried to follow the road signs to guess where you were headed but quickly got lost amidst the different exits and turns. You were both silent. Sometimes you looked at Neil and would swear you felt him stare as well. Only once you have reached the highway, he asked:

“Do you have any questions?”

“Many” you glared at him, and he laughed at your deadpan expression “You haven’t told me your last name” you noticed after a few seconds of thinking.

“You have to be really interested in me if that’s the thing that bothers you most” he replied with a playful smile and you glared at him, stifling the sudden urge to punch him.

“You wish” you retorted under your breath.

Still, you felt your cheeks warm up with embarrassment and decided to stare intensely at the road ahead. Neil bit his lip and glanced at you though you could not see it. He was really enjoying teasing you, probably more than he could have expected.

***

You have arrived at your destination fifteen minutes later. Neil parked the car in front of an old warehouse with no signage or marked entries. You looked at him quizzically and he shrugged:

“Told you it’s a secret organisation” with that he got out of the car.

There were only three other cars parked in front of the building and the area was largely deserted. A high fence was separating the acres of land from the fields around and whoever was entering via the gate had to show ID to the small camera. Neil opened the door with that same ID card, and you followed closely, looking up into another micro camera that was guarding the entrance. He went straight to the desk that you assumed was some sort of reception area and after a small hesitation you joined him. There you came face to face with a smartly dressed woman seated behind the desk with a smile on her face:

“Good afternoon Neil” her grin got even wider as she stood up and beamed at him.

“Hello Anna” he replied with that charming smile on his lips.

God, she’s blushing, you noticed while looking at the receptionist. She has turned a lovely shade of pink and was trying to hide it by looking down at the keyboard. This was embarrassing. You had to admit that Neil is incredibly charming, suave and all but… seriously?! But your train of thought was interrupted by the man in question mentioning your name to Anna and adding: “Our new recruit”

You smiled politely at the woman and shook her hand.

“It’s nice to meet you” she beamed at you as well, but it was lacking that ‘looking at Neil’ spark.

You could not blame her for that. You could feel Neil’s gaze, quietly studying you and briefly wondered if he did that to all the new recruits. The silence has now stretched way too long for a normal social conversation, so you cleared your throat and answered:

“Mutually” you started praying for the awkward situation to end.

“I’ve got some papers for you to fill in” Anna handed you a small pile “It’s for the system and so that we can get you the ID card” you nodded and moved to the side, grateful for something to do.

You got absorbed in filling in all the obscure medical information they wanted. It was hard to suddenly recollect what vaccinations you have had in your late teens and whether you have already had chicken pox. Hearing some high-pitched giggles coming from the desk you glanced in that direction. Neil was leaning over the counter and ostensibly flirting with Anna if her flushed cheeks and sparkling eyes were anything to go by. You rolled your eyes for the second time today and went back to the form.

What you have not noticed was that Neil has glanced in your direction just as you have been expressing your annoyance. He smirked and went back to entertaining Anna whose blind devotion was quite cute in his eyes.

Once you have finished filling in the papers you quickly got up and joined the two ‘lovebirds’. Anna took the pile without a further word and you could only await Neil’s instructions. He threw one last sly smile towards her and focused all of his attention on you:

“So are you ready to see what we are dealing with here?” the playful sparks contradicted the serious tone he spoke with.

“I’ve got nothing better to do” you flashed him your cheekiest smile and was pleased to see him slightly surprised.

Well two can play the game…

***

He led you through the maze of corridors into a small laboratory. Although surprisingly it also had a shooting station and a cabinet full of artillery and arms. Neil headed straight for the case and took out an ordinary looking Glock. He handed you the gun and you automatically checked the magazine to find it empty. Neil only motioned for you to join him by the shooting station.

“Just aim and pull the trigger” he instructed, and you glared at him.

“With an empty magazine?”

“Yes exactly”

You shrugged and adjusted your stance, constantly feeling his gaze boring into you. Letting out a long exhalation to focus, you aimed the gun and pressed the trigger. What came next took you completely by surprise. The moment you released the trigger, a bullet flew into the barrel with a little more force than you were used to, and you stumbled, nearly falling into Neil. He caught you with one hand on your arm and grinned, seeing the dumbfounded look on your face.

“Wasn’t expecting that, huh?” he let go of you after taking one last look at your expression and took the gun back “That was an inverted bullet” he explained “So you catch it instead of firing”

That was a lot to take in. You slowly nodded, trying to process it all.

“Are you ready for inversion?” he asked after giving you space to think for a short while.

“Nope” you grinned “But lead the way”

He stared at you for a little longer then, scanning your face in search of something. But this time you stared right back, facing him with determination. After thirty seconds, which felt like much longer, he turned away and opened a heavy door on the right side of the laboratory’s wall. You followed, not knowing what to expect at all. What you did not anticipate was to enter a darkened room with the lights tinted red, where one of the walls had a massive glass window inserted into it. On the other side of the glass you could see a very similar room but with the light tinted blue. At the opposite end from where you came in there was a massive barrel-shaped metal structure with a doorway and complex mechanisms around it. You noticed that there was the exact same thing on the other side of the room.

“Any questions?” Neil was casually leaning on the wall with his hands in the pockets, observing you with a small smile.

“What’s that?” you pointed at the machine.

“That’s the turnstile. We use it to get inverted” he pushed himself upright and walked over towards you “They’ll explain how it works in technical sense during the training. But I can show you the practical side. Ready?” he run hand through his hair, ruffling it in process.

“More than ever” you took another deep breath of the day.

“Okay, so we’ll go through the turnstile once we can see ourselves entering it on the other side of the proving window” he gestured towards the glass panel.

You noticed with a start that in the other room you could see yourself and Neil. They were moving backwards. As they entered the turnstile on the blue side, Neil quickly took your hand and pulled you inside the machine. You felt the machine screech with the years of use and after a few seconds you were being led out of it and into the blue side of the room. Before you could process what just happened, Neil let go of your hand and continued his explanation:

“The air here is sealed but once we go outside you’ll have to wear an oxygen mask because your lung membranes are now inverted”

You nodded and looked at the other side and the scene playing out there. One that just happened for you mere minutes ago. You started feeling a bit dizzy by trying to understand but attempted to focus on Neil’s briefing:

“They’ll tell you all this in training but normally we wear those protective suits to avoid accidentally touching our forward selves”

“What happens if we do?”

“Annihilation” he winked, and you could only stare in shock.

“Don’t worry about that for now though” he reassured while moving towards the rack filled with respirators and hazard suits.

He handed you a mask with a small oxygen tank attached and you put it on, while he continued:

“Once we exit the airlock, you’ll feel a bit weird at first. You’ll have wind at your back and the gravity will appear reversed for the world around you. But we’ll be within a restricted area, so you’ll be safe” he put on the mask and started to open the door “If at any point you stop feeling alright, let me know okay?” he looked at you intently and you got surprised by seriousness of his gaze.

You just nodded and tried to prepare for what was about to happen. As the airlock opened and you stepped outside, you scanned the scene. The area you have entered was separated from the outside world with a tall fence and was very much like a small training zone with sparring equipment and shooting range. Carefully you took a few steps forwards and suddenly felt a gust of strong wind hit you on the back with force. You stumbled and felt Neil look at you worriedly. You took a deep breath, trying to remain calm despite feeling the familiar chill of anxiety creeping in. Usually in those moments you would try to focus on something mundane so you looked up at the sky, hoping that it would do the job. The moment you looked up, a pigeon flew by, cooing and diving near the fence. Only it was inverted for the way you perceived it. Panicked, you looked at the street visible on the horizon. The cars were running backwards too. That was enough to make the anxiety kick in.

Shit… you gasped and tried to take a deep breath but found that you could not. The respirator made you feel as though you were beginning to suffocate. Every breath was not enough. It felt as though you were stuck in an airtight container, slowly losing the precious oxygen. You turned away from Neil, hoping he won’t notice your distress. You started to hyperventilate with increasing speed. Suddenly you felt Neil’s hand touch your arm, trying to make you face him. You did not want him to see you like that, so you shook it off:

“I’m fine” your voice came out breathless.

You heard him huff out a few strong curse words before he forcefully made you face him.

“No you’re not. You’re hyperventilating” he glanced at the small barometer on your oxygen tank and frowned “Okay, look at me”

Grudgingly you forced yourself to meet his gaze, aware of your tear stained cheeks and ruined mascara. His blue eyes were steady, focused on you. He took one of your hands and placed it on his chest. Your eyes widened in slight confusion, but your mind was too busy panicking to think right now.

“You have to slow down so breathe with me” his voice was soothing; the cockiness was nowhere to be found.

He began to inhale slowly, and you tried to match his tempo while forcing yourself to calm down the racing thoughts. After a few deep breaths synced up this way you felt the wave of anxiety die down. Neil was still looking at you with concern.

“Think I’m better now” you muttered, feeling embarrassed at the scene you just made “Sorry, didn’t know it will be that bad…” you admitted shyly.

With a start you realised you still had your hand placed over his heart and that Neil was keeping it in place, looking at you with an unreadable expression. When you awkwardly tugged at your hand, he released it and asked:

“You really don’t like to ask for help, do you?”

“Not really, no” you smiled slightly, and he mirrored your expression.

Your eyes found his again and you both froze, unable to look away. After another minute, which once again felt much longer, you heard someone clear their throat awkwardly. There was someone else in the training zone. That sobered you up. You quickly took a step away from Neil and glanced at the newcomer, feigning calm and composure. It was a young man with a very anxious expression on his face. You briefly wondered how long he stood there.

“Patrick” Neil greeted him with a handshake “Everything alright?”

“Yeah” Patrick looked in your direction quickly “They need you for a mission”

“Now?”

Patrick just nodded. Neil walked back to you:

“Apologies but as you see I’m needed” he squeezed your hand quickly and you just gaped at him.

Only once he started walking back into the building, did you sober up:

“And you’re just going to leave me here?! I’m bloody inverted!” you shouted, ignoring the terrified look on Patrick’s face.

“Well… yes” Neil shrugged and sent you that annoying roguish grin “Patrick here can help you with the turnstile. I’m sure you two will manage”

You really wanted to punch him.

“Oh and your training begins tomorrow” he added “Anna will tell you the details” and with that he was gone.

Fucking hell… you groaned and looked at Patrick who stared at the ground, clearly hoping that the earth would consume him any second now.

You felt very tired.

[jiminrings]

the volleyball shorts

pairing: jungkook x y/n

wordcount: 5k

glimpse: coach koo’s just dying to know what his present is, you’re panicking because you can’t think of a present, and jimin and the gang tolerate jungkook a little bit better because it’s his special day :D // contains smut + gif isn’t mine!!

notes: happy birthday jungkook!!! i baked brownies irl for you u should come over sometime!!!

if you’ve read most valuable, the piece that started it all, then you knOw what i’m alluding to with jungkook and his relationship with y/n’s volleyball shorts!!

you swear,,

you could even really SWEAR on the brand-new refrigerator that you need to knock twice on to see what it contained that you split the price with jimin

and forcibly with also jungkook because he stays over so much at yours and jimin’s place that he’s basically a roommate now

and alsO forcibly with taehyung and yoongi because apparently your apartment is now everyone’s gathering place and they raid and inhale ur fridge atleast 72 times per day that the electricity bill’s gone up

that yesterday, it was just a month away from jungkook’s birthday!! you swear!!

and two hours ago, it was two weeks away!!

AND NOW

you can’t really digest the truth

that it’s just f i v e days away now

and you have zero thoughts to how you’re gonna throw jungkook his birthday bash :D

the guys probably figured that out too lol because they have an idea to how you’d be all over the place for even something miniscule

like one time you and jimin bought two rugs you couldn’t decide upon then you just agreed that you’d fit it underneath the coffee table and whichever looks ugly, you’ll return it later

but then the two rugs ended up being too pretty that you couldn’t decide nOW

and jupiter barked out of the blue and it was a eureka moment because :D aHA jimin what if we just let jupiter pick out the rug?? then that way it’s fair???

but then jupiter ended up lying on bOTH the rugs and now you were distraught

jimin was reassuring you like eH it’s okay let’s just go about our days and not spend y’know :D all our time trying to figure out what to pick :D

and then you obviously refused and you stayed up the whole night picking a goddamn rug and jimin was so close to toppling over in fear when he went to grab water at three in the morning

anyways

that’s why they’re here!!! even before you could call and gather them up when jungkook had to leave by himself to settle some things because he’s the coach,,

even before you could text tae and yoongi to take the elevator, they’re already knocking at your door

“...”

“......”

everyone’s just looking at each other in this makeshift circle you’re all in around the coffee table

even jupiter’s stopped barking and he’s been barking for the past five minutes at the new cactus succulent that jimin bought!!!

they’re waiting

waiting for that —

“I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT TO DO FOR JUNGKOOK I’M SUCH A BAD GIRLFRIEND A-AND-“

aha

meltdown

“not to stir the pot, but jungkook always zones out at practice and even during games then gIGGLES to himself!! and when i ask him why, he says that he’s just thinking about what you’re getting him for his birthday!!”

jimin shudders at that too because whew

like he knew that koo sometimes talks to inanimate objects but man his superior (albeit younger) is out here imagining his birthday present in the middle of a neck-and-neck game

he’s conversing with himself like he’s talking to you and that just makes him speechless

“kook buddy i haven’t played volleyball competitively in like two years but i sUGGEST you focus or else i will spike you haha jk but no really ahaha :))”

“not to stir the pot too, but jungkook asked me to play happy birthday. on the snare. happy birthday. ON THE SNARE.”

this time, it’s taehyung’s turn to shudder

because he got a new head that’s louder and more tear-resistant and he wanted to try it out ok

and what better way to try that than when it’s in one of your practice games??

he has his drumsticks already lifted but then out of nowhere jungkook pOps out with a cheeky grin on his face and tae almost pokes him in the eye

“how many syllables are your name, tae?”

“... are you really asking me this?”

“yeah!! how many?”

“... three, jungkook. what, do you need ME to count yOUR syllables for you??”

oh my god that is such a stupid question

but it’s coming from jungkook so lmao tae isn’t all that surprised

“what’s three plus twenty?”

“i get that you’re an athlete but don’t you kNOW how to count???”

“hyung what’s three plus twenty??”

“... twenty-three....”

tae’s so close to narrowing his eyes because if this is another one of jungkook’s lame pranks then he’s gonna whack him in the head for this

but then all of a sudden jungkook jUMPS and squeals before clapping his hands

“twenty-three days before my birthday!! quick quick play happy birthday for me nOW :D”

that’s so... chilling

“now not to stir the pot even further, but y/n,,, baby,,, why didn’t you brainstorm earlier??”

yoongi goes straight-in for the kill and it’s his version of “i told you so” but that does not make it better whatsoever

that’s the thing you don’t know either!!!!

and it’s totally your fault and you shouldn’t have been complacent because now you’re paying the repercussions of cramming AND panic-sweating!!!

it’s okay!

you got this! :D

“how about some more black shirts??” tae pitches in and it’s a resounding no from you and the assistant coach

“jungkook has enough of those,, even jimin and i can take a dozen from his stash and it won’t even make a dent!!”

jimin’s racking his brain and he hasn’t thought about something this hard but ok fine anything for you

“new chunky shoes?? but uGH he already has too many of those-“ that makes him groan even harder because buying another pair for kook means him tripping over them

not to mention that the shoe rack is now taken over by jungkook atleast 50%

and once again jimin reiterates <3 this is the y/n and jimin apartment and nOT the y/n and jimin and this dude that dOESN’T pay rent apartment

yoongi’s in deep thought as everyone around him throws ideas around

okay dOn’t tell anyone but yoongi’s now getting into bullet-journaling :D

tae just gave him a dotted notebook one day because he accidentally bought a dozen instead of one from amazon so lol here hyung u like writing right???

by writing, yoongi meant scribbling haphazardly and waking up the next day and trying to decipher his own handwriting

but then he came over to your apartment and you bought pastel highlighters because they were on sale and nOT because you needed them and you wanted to try them out!!! but jungkook was sick that time and you needed to make soup :((

“yeah ok leave it to me,, i’ll swatch it for you or something.,.,.”

one thing led to another and :D AHA

yoongi blackmailed everyone to not say a single word to anyone that he now loves bullet-journaling and he had to whack tae one time when he kept teasing him

also he now has a bujo account on instagram and it’s nearing 5k followers omg and he will d-word when someone irl finds out that it’s him

“boxers.”

yoongi says seriously and it makes everyone shut up because he sounded sO sure

he just has this certain authorative aura around him that you wavered because oH right yes boxers,,, will buy,,,, thank you

lol but you snapped out of it

“jungkook already has too many boxers!! he likes basketball shorts more nowadays and-“

“what? who said the boxers were for jungkook??” yoongi scrunches his nose at your ridiculous reply

your eyes are squinted so hard as you try to decipher the flow of thoughts of everyone in this circle

“oh. i want boxers. want them for christmas!! take note, y/n.”

oh

okay

cool

good news: you now know what you’re gonna give to yoongi on christmas

bad news: you dON’T know what to give to your boyfriend on his birthday five days from now

there’s something somewhere in the middle of all the banter that you’ve tuned out though

something that just makes your eyes bulge and hit whoever’s lap is beside you repeatedly (first of all it’s jimin’s for the record and second oW THAT HURTS) with a grin on your face before you hurriedly stand up and they equally as hurriedly do after

“i know what to get!!”

jungkook’s stArting to get antsy if he’s being honest

it’s not because he’s in his own apartment with you after so long he’s stayed over at yours

he really doesn’t mind that bit, no

jimin, tae, and yoongi were all staying over at your apartment instead as they make the last bit of preparations for jungkook’s birthday the next day!!

they all insisted that you rest because you’ve been so frantic the last couple of days and tbh even taehyung hyped of tWO cups of coffee can’t keep up

no — jungkook’s so antsy because he doesn’t know what you have in store for him :((

for the last five days you haven’t touched him nor did you let him touch you :((

a heated makeover that’s cut too short is as far as it could only go and he’s just so????

like is that a part of your birthday surprise or nOT

he has a love-hate relationship with surprises now because first of all,,,

he kNOWS that there’s gonna be a surprise and that excites him

but the worst of it all is that he knows there’s a surprise but he doesn’t know what it is

that’s like uhm

standing fifty feet away and being forced to pick between a lifetime supply of sugar and salt that’s placed into jars but u don’t know which is which

that is such an odd example to compare it to but that’s only what jungkook could process this now oKAY

you still let jungkook cuddle you so he guesses he could still touch you

he could rest his hand on your tummy!!!

but riGht when he’s about to sneak in a lil squeeze at your boob over your shirt then that’s when you slap his hand away and he frowns

just some hOURS left and it’s finally his birthday!!! he’ll just nuzzle to your neck and all would be fine :)

the lil party’s gonna be thrown in jungkook’s apartment anyways because as you’ve all come to known:

his apartment’s bigger than the one you and jimin share and that irks him because!!!

“yOU have the bigger and better aprtment why are you still cramping at ours???”

“i like staying with you guys!!!”

“nO you like staying with y/n and i come in handy when you need to steal someone’s pasta from!! i bought you tupperware and wrote your name on it but you still eat from mINE!!”

now everyone has their designated roles

jimin’s in charge of making the lasagna and he takes great pride in arranging the layers neatly and not half-assing the amount of cheese

taehyung had the great idea of wAIT what if they don’t like lasagna?? (jimin was offended by that omg who wouldn’t like my lasagna are u kiddinG)

so what he did was bring over this foldable table :D lay cups of ramen neatly :D decorate jungkook’s kettle because he realized that it looks like dOlphin when you tilt it sideways :D

and it’s now tae’s ramen station and so far the party-goers are LOVING it and it’s a close tie between him n jimin

yoongi’s in charge of food that the other two didn’t bother to think about basically

you locked jungkook in his own room lmao and had to bribe him with a kiss or two to stay there and not leave until you tell him to

you’re in charge of the decoration and not to toot ur own horn or anything but you did a pretty damn good job :D

there’s foil balloons you had to blow up and decorate meticulously

lol jimin accidentally bought the wrong ones so now it’s JUNGK00K instead of JUNGKOOK

you even learned how to fold paper cranes so u could fold the quantity of them to jungkook’s age for yoongi to stick them up to the ceiling

you EVEN bought blackout curtains and a lil disco light!!! that’s how well-put you were despite cram-planning!!

it was time to let out jungkook because the guests were starting to come in

and oh my gOD jungkook does clean up well..,.. wow

he’s dressed himself in just a white button-up but with the sleeves folded and some buttons left alone

thEn it’s the same black jeans but with a fancy belt he only pulls out whenever he goes to prissy parties!!!

and oh god

oh my

it’s his slicked hair that’s showing his forehead and tHAT’S when it sinks in you that oh.,.,. right.,.. jungkook’s growing his hair out and he’s been in a cap this past week and OH

it only hits you that oh.,.. jesus christ.,.,. jungkook has a mULLET

it’s a mullet-type of situation and it’s part-straight and part-wavy and wOW

you want nothing more but to pounce on him and it makes you audibly gUlp

jungkook’s as surprised as you were of him because w-wait a second

ok you’re wearing your favorite white shirt with the print on it that you wear at home!! he isn’t surprised

but are you wearing vOLLEYBALL SHORTS.,.,..

like as in the same volleyball shorts... that he..... adores..... a-and fantasizes over

oh my god everybody shut up

is that-

is that hIS OLD VARSITY JACKET????

the one with Jeon embroidered in the back and the one he wore to death that it still has his scent on it even if you washed it clean???

.... oh

that uH that makes jungkook put a hand over his chest

god im coming up

the party was an absolute bLAST!!

you and jungkook would stray from each other time to time because you’re each whisked away to talk but you’d always find each other after

you cAn’t contain yourselves at the sight of one another

kook keeps putting his arm around your waist and you keep squeezing his forearm

over-all it was such a great party 20/10

the girls chipped in to buy their coach jungkook (u put the idea in their head and they were amazed because they didn’t think of it) a smartwatch and he was so :D upon receiving it because wOah!!! omg he’s now a smartwatch owner sUck that kim namjoon

kim wears these fancy analog watches still and that makes jungkook roll his eyes because yEa that may be a rolex but my team did obliterate yours lmaOoo what about that huh

jimin’s gift was very heartwarming no matter how much he denies it to be

first he bought jungkook matching slippers with him because he’s so irked to see jungkook in chunky sneakers aLL the time

then uhm

an official key to the apartment and a written letter that when the two of your drive back,,, you could all do a handprint at the picture frame with the four of you and that’s jupiter’s paw included

you’re not gonna lie that dID make you tear up a little bit because wow :((( jimin used to be hesitant of jungkook at first but nOw he’s officially welcoming jungkook in with no anger whatsoever

kook also did cry a lil bit and they hugged it out

taehyung hand-knitted a blanket for jungkook with lil dolphins on them

he missed some stitches but he did his best oKAY and koo was so excited because wow omg this is so good!!!

yoongi bought jungkook a guitar because yeah.,.,. u dO get into my nerves sometimes but i care for you and i guess you’re my little brother now :)) i don’t make the rules

and as for your gift

... well

everyone’s already left and it’s just the two of you now finally

jungkook’s sat at the edge of the bed patiently because you’re fishing for the paper bag you’ve hidden and he’s sO on edge alright

he’s closed his eyes and you didn’t even tell him to so he’s THAT obedient

“you can open them now,” you’re sat on jungkook’s lap and it’s quite the tease for you to be perched near to his knees instead of his crotch but oK he won’t complain yet

it’s a box??

oh

... oH

“that’s for me??”

jungkook awes immediately when he opens to box and sees shiny silver gleam right up at him

it’s the matching thick necklace and bracelet he’s been eyeing for quite some time now yet refUses to buy

and here it is!!!! right in his hands!!!

“yes and they dOn’t allow refunds so please just wear them and don’t make yourself guilty!!”

you’re taking it from his hands and he’s smiling giddily when you clasp the cool jewelry around his neck and on his wrist

cute

and now it’s time for —

“i’m sleepy. are you sleepy yet?”

you do your part in messing with jungkook as you stifle a yawn, pretending to arrange things around the room before settling near him at the edge of the bed

he almost gives himself whiplash to look at you because you can NOT be serious

“no you’re not. you aren’t sleepy. your eyes tear up when you wanna go to bed.”

it’s endearing for you that he knows thay but you just continue to deadpan for the time-being

“i do? well i think i’m tearing up now.”

jungkook scoffs and crosses his arms across his chest because nO your eyes are dry!!!! look at them!!!! not a single tear!!!!

he’s looking at you so pointedly that it makes you chuckle, finally sitting down on his lap properly like he wanted you to that it makes him grunt

jungkook hasn’t had any decent action for a week now and even the slightest contact of you sitting on him, still-clothed, already makes him cRUMBLE

the thought that you’re in your volleyball shorts doesn’t help at all

it’s nice seeing him so flustered and willed right now,, his pupils already blOwn out and you haven’t even done anything

jungkook’s beautiful and that isn’t up to debate but even more-so up close that you could hear his labored yet trembling breathing

“you wanna kiss me?”

that dOES it for him and he almost leaps at the question but that’s when you pull back to which he audibly whines

:D

you come back again but it’s you who initiates it and jungkook practically melts at the taste of your mouth, already getting handsy as he squeezes at your thighs

he’s the one who’s gaining the upper hand and that was nOT the plan so that’s why you pull away right when he’s getting drunk on you

he’s chasing after your lips and you practically tut at him condescendingly that makes him huff again

“say please.”

aHA

jungkook’s eyes widen at that and he scoffs in disbelief because oh my god so tHIS is what you’re doing

now this is what he makes you say

and you never got him to say please because whenever you urge him to he just laUGHS upfront and it makes you pout

no jungkook’s not gonna do —

his giggling’s cut short when you let your mouth wander to his neck and right on to his sweet spot, immediately sucking on it harshly to paint your mark on

there’s slow kisses on his jugular nexy and you won’t do the same as what you did to him the first time and it’s frUstrating

add on to that with how you remind him you’re still on his lap with you grinding on him tOO pain-achingly slow

ok jungkook might say please after all

you’re coming back up to his jaw again and kissing everywhere but his lips that it’s starting to make him cave

“pl-“ he stops himself because oh gOd is he yielding but that’s when you snap too smoothly right on him, the intimate yet clothed feeling of you enough to make him moan in distress

“please?”

it’s instant relief when you’re back to kissing jungkook again and he might just bURST at this point and you’ve only been kissing him

tasting your lips is his first priority and breathing’s his second that it makes you chuckle with how needy he is, having to push him off because you know he’s getting light-headed

jungkook’s regaining his breath and he still wants mORE unsurprisingly

you’re taking off his shirt and stripping off his pants that leaves him with his boxers but on the other hand, you’re sTILL fully-clothed sans the varsity jacket

he’s about to do something with that which explains his grabby hands trYing to take off your shirt

but his hands not only get slapped away again, you’re pINNING them down back to the bed

“y/n i swear-“

he’s growing restless because he needs you right here and right now but you’re just tOO stubborn and bossy which is definitely a switch of roles

you grind on him a little too roughly than you intended to but the feeling’s more than welcome because you feel so fULL already and it makes jungkook unintentionally thrust into you

your shorts are feeling more than damp and his boxers are being a little tOo tight now

that’s when you lift yourself up from his crotch and let go of his hands, your face dangerously near his as his pupils shake

jungkook’s clearly looking at your centre and he whines when you still (purposely) won’t get what he’s trying to say

he’s always clearly had a vision of eating you out in your volleyball shorts that’s for sUre

but he didn’t imagine it like this and you know what he’s not complaining his hips try to buck up but to no avail, your finger hooked underneath his chin to make him look at you again

jungkook looks sO fucked out and he knows that far

he cries like a lost puppy with how you press your thumb to his bottom lips, your other hand making soothing circles on his chest

“you want a taste?” you ask ever so gently and that makes kook nod more than eagerly, about to pull you by your thighs and his mouth’s wAtering just by thinking about it

it’s the tut you give him again that makes him succumb, throat strained as he trains his pleading eyes on you for permission

“p-please?” jungkook’s too impatient to wait for an answer as he roughly grabs you to position your clothed core right above his face, immediately pressing his nose to inhale the scent of you with his lips ghosting your already-soaked folds — something so obscene about it that it almost makes your knees buckle, “that’s a g-good boy.”

he’s rELISHING on the slip of your tongue and he wastes no times in taking off your shorts, diving in with an eager tongue that takes you off-guard

now this is the real deal

jungkook takes mUCH pleasure in giving you yours and the unhinged and dirty moans you’re giving him are egging him on further

you taste so sweet and it’s enough to make him dizzy with how you’re opened up to him and for him only

he has a death grip on your thighs because you keep twitching and on the other hand he’s cravinG for you to take everything he’s giving you

he slips his hand to thumb at your clit in desperate circles and god the countdown to when you’re gonna reach your peak becomes alarmingly too near

jungkook doesn’t stop when you’re tugging at his hair roughly or when you’re yelling out his name like a mantra

jungkook doesn’t stop either when his face from the nose down is starting to get messy with the taste of you

doesn’t stop either when he’s starting to see your eyes become glassy and your lip trembling

absolutely doesn’t stop when you snap suddenly and gush over him because in fact, he still continues with much more fervor

jungkook was messy and kept lapping up at what you were giving him that’s enough to drive you into anoTher orgasm with how sensitive you are

holy fuck

jungkook’s laughing against your neck as you’re draped over him, making flowers bloom on your neck with his tongue as he makes you catch your breath

“there’s still another gift i haven’t showed you.”

okay nOW you’re nervous

kook stops pressing kisses and your words obviously make him perk, trying to hide his fascination and excitement but that’s poorly-done with how he’s trying to hide it

“you have mORE?? think y’already gave me heaven if i’m being honest”

he wouldn’t be opposed because honestly speaking his stamina as of the moment would last him aLL night and he’s on a high just from eating you out!!

oh my god you can’t possibly fall in love more with jungkook

you’re tracing the sweat that’s going down on the necklace and it makes you go lightheaded with how perfect he looks

the imprint of his bracelet’s marked snug on your left thigh with how hard he was gripping you earlier

he’s patiently waiting and waiting on you, drumming his fingers on your thighs in anticipation

here goes nothing!!!!

you take off your shirt and aHH jungkook visibly moans at the sight of a bare you

he’s right you are the present

but nO that’s not what you’re trying to get at

jungkook has his wandering hands taken down for the nth time this week but something about this feels a bit more special and reserved

he’s a little lost when you get off from him and instead sit beside him against the pillows, still kneeling on the bed so you could be higher than how he’s sat right now

he is mORE than lost when you smile at him gently and take his hand to —

oh

oh my god

oH MY GOD

it’s a tattoo

it’s a tiny and dainty tattoo on your rib in black ink

JJK

“jjk? that’s-“

holy fucking sHIT

everybody shut up!!!

everybody pLEASE be quiet jungkook needs a moment rn

it’s his initials

in his handwriting

on your skin.

oh my god

you’ve always adored jungkook’s tattoos i mean it’s nOt a surprise for anyone

they peak from time to time but sometimes they get covered with his coach jackets and his hoodies

and it’s at home where you can see them all

there’s a little inkling in the back of your head that oOH you’ve always wanted one like what he has

what was holding you back was that maybe it would affect your career or whatever

you and jimin read the guidelines for a whole hour and it wasn’t illegal for players to have tattoos!!!

as long as it doesn’t go against the rules and it won’t hinder your play

tattoos on the wrist or in between the fingers or in the forearm were a little risky because it’s always in direct contact with how you play

jimin was all thumbs-up on your idea because he himself has a couple of tattoos and was all wOah that’s so sweet!!!

taehyung was very warm with your idea and he swears that he’ll get one soon just give him some tIME to conceptualize what would his first one be

yoongi agreed and he alsO has tattoos himself and he was the most realistic (?) out of the four of you going “well you and jungkook better not break up lol”

he thought of it more and honestly?? he doesn’t see you and jungkook breaking up because there’s just sOMETHING alright??? something so unbreakable

jimin and taehyung and yoongi made a bet when you were getting your tat cleaned up that lmao what year would jungkook propose in

it’s your first tattoo and like you didn’t want to dive in head first and have a whole sLEEVE tattooed on the first occassion ya know

so why not the one you love?

and like it’s hidden by a shirt and obviously not a LOT of people would know about it and —

oh wow

uhhhh

jungkook’s.... crying?

he loves you sO much you have no idea

you’re tasting the salt from his tears when he kisses you so tenderly but it’s okay you don’t mind

he’s the one pinning you down this time and well he used to swear that he’s nEver the one for giggly sex

but oh god look at him now

mAYBE THAT’S WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU’RE HAPPY AND ON CLOUD NINE!!!

he has your hands flat against the mattress before he holds them :D

this is jungkook’s best birthday eVER 

“wanna spend all my birthdays with you.”

you instantly giggle to his neck and that tickled him a little bit okay

“you wanna marry me??”

you’re feeling everything at once and you have never grinned sO hard and laughed

jungkook rolls his eyes but that’s only because he might burst if he keeps looking at you

“well i don’t have the ring yet dummy but yEs i do want to marry you!!”

mrs. jeon!!!

wow that sounds hEAVENLY

you raise your head to whisper to his ear, leaning down for you instead so you wouldn’t strain yourself, “say please.”

“i hATE you,” jungkook cackles and it should be illegal to how warm and content he feels!! 

“you love me!!” there’s a lil sing-song voice and of cOURSE he does!!

he’s so whipped for you and he might go to the ends of the earth just because you insist

“solid facts.”

“my god—“ jungkook stills, laughing at you who’s underneath him before he breaks out into a grin

a little tiny ᵏᶦˢˢ on your nose

“what was life before you?”

[suchalonelysunflower]

“One of the Boys” (M.C)

Pairings: Michael Clifford X Reader

Summary: College!AU ~ Friends to Lovers. You and Michael are best friends since forever, that’s why you feel the need to hide your crush on him. But when he makes a hurtful comment, you are determined to prove him wrong. Could that be enough to make him love you?

Warnings: The reader uses she/her pronouns, I’m sorry if I make anyone uncomfortable with that, it was not my intention. Angst with fluffy parts. Language, low self esteem issues, cheating (a little bit, it depends on how you view it) one sexual reference and some grammar and syntax errors (English it’s not my first language, I’m sorry)

Word Count: 5.5K

Author’s Note: My first Michael Fic! I waited so long and it’s finally here ✨ This is slyghtly based on a personal experience (mine didn’t have this ending) I hope you like it! Feedback, reblogs and comments are always welcomed, I love to hear from you guys 💕 You can read my other works HERE 🦋

You had to admit it, you weren’t exactly a very ‘feminine’ girl. But that the hell was wrong with that? Yes, you preferred leggings and big hoodies over skirts and tight dresses. Yes, you skateboarded everyday to school and hanged out with boys all the time, drinking beers instead of fancy little cocktails. Yes, you never really cared about boy bands or artists like Justin Bieber or Drake. And yes, you would rather die than have high heels on for more than 2 hours straight. But that’s just who you are, how you’ve always been. His comment shouldn’t have hurt that much, but why are you crying about it?

You have been roomates with Michael since you two started college. You always joked about how you were going to live together someday and have a fridge full of junk food and soda. Well, now you do (except from the junk food part, that proved to be an awful experience)

To be honest, you didn’t have that many friends besides him and your other four knuckleheads you know and love from your early school days. Luke was the youngest of all of you, and maybe that’s why everybody thought he was the innocent one (even though he was the mastermind of almost every prank you ever pulled) Calum was the shy one, as people would put it, but just get to know him a little bit and you wouldn’t be able to shut him up. Ashton is supposedly the mature one, but his quick-witted mind and his inability of staying put in a place gives him the same amount of energy as a five year old. And then there was Michael, your best friend, there isn’t a time in your life where Michael wasn’t by your side, weather it was for pulling a prank on someone, skipping school or just playing video games in his basement, he was always there. So moving in together was a no brainer.

The friendship consisted on having the same level of confidence as an old married couple, trusting each other with everything, nothing being off limits, well, except for one thing…

You and Michael were friends and nothing more. That was clear for both of you. For years you both ignored the teasing and assumptions of you guys being a couple. Just the idea of it seeming so absurd to even imagine. But there’s a fine line between love and friendship.

Over the last few years, you began to think that the idea of being Michael’s girlfriend didn’t sound so bad after all. It was impossible to pin the pivotal point of that thought, but somehow somewhere along the road, you started to feel more flustered every time he leaned into a hug, felt butterflies in your stomach with each look he speared your way or how he said your name with such a caring tone. You found yourself thinking of him more often than not, especially on how his arms would look around you waist, how it will feel to be loved by him, to kiss him…

But you couldn’t think like that, not about your best friend. So it’s better to keep it hidden in the deepest part of your soul, praying to whoever’s above that it will go away soon, but when does that ever work?

Maybe that’s why his comment hurt so bad.

It was a lazy Monday, you didn’t have to work today and that meant you could spend your afternoon beating Michael’s ass in video games. But you couldn’t concentrate with your thoughts wandering over the man who owns your heart. It was the third time you let him win in Mario Kart when he caught on your mood.

“You really suck today, huh?” Michael asked as he watches Mario celebrate yet another victory.

“Or maybe you’re finally getting good” You replied, resting your head lazily in one hand, not taking your eyes from the screen.

Michael furrowed his brows, worrying as he heard a light sigh come out of your lips “Hey, are you okay?” He asked, but you don’t seem to hear him, so he accommodates himself on the couch in order to look at you properly and puts a hand on your leg, just right above the knee “Y/N?”

“Huh?” You say, finally lifting your gaze in order to meet his and oh, how you wish you didn’t. Lost in the sea of those green eyes that consumed every thought of your mind, you felt yourself blushing under him and trying very hard not to think on his hand touching your thigh “What? No, yeah. I’m fine.”

“Liar. You let me win, that never happens. Tell me, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong”

“Y/N,”

“Nothing’s wrong, Michael. I swear”

His eyes scanned you, knowing damn well something was up.

“Well,” He said, patting your leg, softly “If you’re not gonna tell me… Then I will make you”

Before you could even comprehend what he meant by that, he was already leaning over your figure with a devilish grin as his hands traveled to your sides and started tickling you mercilessly.

Tears formed in the corner of your eyes as you couldn’t contain the laughter that came over you. Begging him to stop, you tried to escape his grip, but it wasn’t the first time this had happened and you know this is a fight you can’t. Michael joined in laughter as he came closer to you, pinning you under him on the sofa.

But suddenly, his movements stop as he becomes very aware of the position you’re in. You give one last laugh before turning to face him, only to find him already staring at you. You shudder under his gaze as you realize the way his legs are intertwined with yours, wondering if it’s his cellphone on the pocket of his shorts or something else is brushing up against your lower body.

Michael’s eyes never leave yours as your breath becomes even. And he couldn’t help but notice the way that your lips parted slightly, almost inviting him for a taste.

“Hey, dude, sorry to bother you but.. Oh shit, you’re fucking on the couch?” A voice came through the door, making you push Michael onto the floor before getting caught in that position. Raising your head over the sofa, you were met by Ashton and Luke’s grin disappearing from their faces as your face came to view “Oh, it’s just Y/N. WAIT, Were you fucking Y/N?!”

Rolling your eyes and giving them the middle finger, you stand up from the couch, regretting ever giving them a key in the first place, and went straight to the bathroom, trying to hide the red of your cheeks.

But just before you could close the door, you heard Michael say “What are you talking about? It Y/N! She’s practically one of the boys!”

He didn’t mean to hurt you. He had good intentions with that comment, of course he did. But you couldn’t stop overthinking it, crying at the thought of you being so unattractive in his eyes.

“So he wants a girly girl?” You thought, already planning a strategy “I’ll show him, then”

That’s how it started. You began to wear the dresses that were long forgotten on your wardrobe, you started using makeup and styling your hair in something other than a messy bun.

It was confusing at first and not at all what you were used to, but there was a new energy surrounding you, a confident one. You were going to show Michael that you could be feminine, maybe that way he’ll notice you in a ‘more than just a friend’ kinda way.

The first time the boys saw you with your new look they were all sharing breakfast in your kitchen. With your apartment being closer to campus they might as well move in.

“Good morning, guys” You said cheerfully, not looking at anyone in particular.

They all stared at you, looking at you up and down. And just before you could reach the cereal box, the questions started coming.

“What the hell is going on?”

“Y/N why are you dressed like a girl? IS THAT MAKE UP?”

“Do you have a date? It’s 8 am on a Tuesday! Who are they? Vampires?”

“Who are you and what did you do to our Y/N?”

“Is the simulation broken?”

“Shhh” You said, raising the palm of your hand as you poured cereal in a bowl “It’s too damn early for any of you to do that much noise and I haven’t had my coffee yet” As in que, Ashton passed you your usual mug “Thank you, and to answer some of your inquiries. 1) Nothing’s going on, Calum. 2) I happen to be a girl, Luke. Thank you for noticing. 3) I do not have a date, nor I should use that as an excuse to put on some nice clothes. I just,, felt like it” You took a long sip from the hot beverage “The simulation broke down a long time ago and I’m still me. I’m just wearing different clothes, that’s all. Right, Mikey?”

Michael choked with his toast, coughing as he tried to gain some composure “Yeah, you look… great” He said with a shy smile, and he was right. The others joined in with the compliments, hyping and teasing you about how he will have to be more protective of you because you will sure bring home some hot dates looking like that.

It’s been a couple of weeks since that morning and everyday Michael complimented you. You’d be lying if you say that every word he says doesn’t fill your heart with butterflies. Maybe there’s a possibility that he feels the same way.

It was a pretty uneventful evening in the little coffee shop where you worked. You didn’t have many clients today, so the dim lights and the sweet voice of Hozier that blasted through the speakers allowed you to daydream. Michael’s face popped out in your mind, smiling as you remembered the way that he looked at you this morning. Finally proving that you were more than just “One of the boys”

You were so caught up in your thoughts that you didn’t hear the bell chime when the door opened, only waking up when you saw those same eyes that had you smiling just a minute ago standing in front of you, staring at you as well.

“Hey Y/N! How’s it going?” He asked, smiling at you.

“Nothing much” You shrug “Just the same amount of pain and tiredness of the average college experience” Michael rolled his eyes at your sarcasm. That’s when a giggle caught your attention.

The most beautiful woman you ever laid your eyes on was standing next to Michael. She had the bluest eyes you’ve ever seen and her wavy hair complemented her face like an angel. She sure didn’t seem real, how did you not notice her when she entered? Were you really that busy focusing on Michael?

“I can totally relate to that” The girl said with a smile, god even her smile was perfect.

“Y/N, this is Veronica. Veronica, Y/N” Michael introduced.

You smiled politely at her and she did the same “Oh, the famous Y/N! I heard a lot about you, I can’t wait to get to know you better”

Um, what? Michael has been talking about you? To her? You couldn’t tell if it was good or a bad sign.

“Really? Well, don’t believe anything he says. Unless they are good things, then he’s right”

“Okay! Thank you, Y/N” He interrupted, mocking annoyance “I’ll take my usual please, darling. And she will have…”

“Just a mocha, please”

You nodded “Coming right up” You smiled at her as she walked to a table. Michael leaned over the counter and whispered.

“Could you do one of those drawing people do in the coffee? She will love that. Thanks.” He gave you a kiss on the cheek and walked away, sitting close to Veronica in one of the booths just before he could notice the way your cheeks turned to a much brighter red.

An hour passes. Then two. Then two and a half. And you were standing there, acting as a witness of their chemistry. You cursed yourself as your eyes drifted towards them, watching them laugh and talk about life. It was clear that Michael was enchanted by her, moving closer and closer every time, and you could tell the feeling was mutual as she laid her delicate hand on his.

Of course Michael would go for the pretty girls. Veronica was gorgeous, you couldn’t pinpoint a single defect on that girl, not even with a magnifying glass and you hated that. You hated the fact that he brought her here, you hated the fact that you have to work while his love story unfolds like a Taylor Swift song, you hated that it you weren’t the one sitting next to him, talking about dreams and how everything just collides perfectly within the universe. But that’s not your story.

“Earth calling Y/N?” A voice calls in front of you “Hello?”

You blink a few times and stare at the tall blond man waving his hand in front of your face “Sorry, Luke. Didn’t see you there” You excuse yourself “What can I get for you?”

“The usual, but this time with at least four more shots of espresso. I have to put an all nighter again cause I have that stupid presentation and you are not listening to me again”

“Sorry, what? Four shots of espresso, yeah.” Your gaze averted his “Anything else?”

“Okay, what’s going on?” Luke followed where your eyes led and soon he was, too, staring at the reason of your distraction “Oh”

Out of the four of them, Luke was the only one who knew about your feelings for Michael. He was always very supportive and didn’t pressure you into confessing right away, knowing it must be hard for you. So he can’t imagine what is going on inside your head right now, watching the man you love on a date.

“He didn’t tell me he had a date” You told him.

“He mentioned this morning” Luke added “Said he met her at one of his classes and that she seemed cool. So he asked her out. He never told us he would bring her here “You clenched your jaw, trying to keep the tears at bay. Luke noticed that “I’m sorry, love. I thought he told you about it”

“She is gorgeous, Luke”

“She’s not you, though” You scoffed.

“Exactly”

“Y/N…”

“I’m fine,” You lied “Really, I’m okay. It was a silly crush anyway. And plus, look how happy he looks”

And it was true. Michael did look very happy chatting and flirting with Veronica. His smile reaching his eyes as she spoke and laugh at all his jokes. He truly must like her, and you… Well, some people are just meant to be the side character of another person’s story.

Luke let out a sigh, knowing well enough to assume you are just going to bury your feelings like you always do “He will soon realize what he’s missing”

************************************************

Well, six months passed and he still hasn’t realized. It’s been six month since that fateful evening where you got your heart broken by the man you love. It’s been six months since Veronica has been a constant part of your daily life, sleeping over, joining on movie nights and replaced your spot next to your best friend. It’s been six months of dressing more ‘girly’, wearing make-up and doing your nails, all of it trying to call Michael’s attention, to make you look more like Veronica, more like someone you are not. And all of that for what? You still ended up crying yourself to sleep almost every night.

Luke has been there for you all this time, letting you crash in his place whenever she came over and trying to distract you from the heartache by making jokes or goofing around, sometimes even letting you stay the night just to talk or cry or whatever you needed.

Tonight, however, it was a special night. Michael texted you saying that he finally found the movie you were dying to see for years! It was a special straight to dvd movie with Betty White that you remember it being your favorite growing up but you could never find it anywhere. And to say that you were ecstatic when Michael suggested a movie night for the two of you, would be an understatement.

You got the popcorn ready, ordered some pizzas and the ice cream was in the freezer. It was the first time in months that you would have time alone with Michael and, honestly, you missed him like crazy. Yes, you know he lives there, but it’s been a while since you guys actually talked or shared a good laugh together. Putting your feelings towards him aside, you just missed your best friend.

Suddenly, the bell rang. It wasn’t uncommon for Michael to forget his keys, so you weren’t really surprised.

“How many times do I have to tell you that we bought you that keychain for a reason and-“ But it wasn’t Michael standing at the door “Veronica.. I thought you were Michael”

The girl smiled, (really, not even a chip tooth?) “Yeah, he told me he’ll be a little late and that I should just go ahead” She said as she made her way into the apartment.

“Oh?”

“Yeah, I love movie night!”

He invited her. It was a moment for the two of you and he invited her.

You couldn’t be mad, could you? She’s his girlfriend, after all. She could be here and he had every right to invite her, but… But it still hurt. You thought you’d be spending the evening with your best friend, he said you would. It was a special movie for the both of you, why invite her?

“Can I be honest with you, Y/N?” Veronica said, pulling you away from your mind.

“Uh, sure”

“I have to admit, I was really intimidated by you”

“By me? Why?”

“Well, when Michael talked about you I always thought I had to compete for his attention. It was always Y/N this, Y/N that… He assured me that you were just friends, but I didn’t believe him until I met you. I love that he has a friend like you. You really mean a lot to him so, thank you”

You nodded and muttered a “no problem”

She was right, you were just a friend of Michael’s. Why did you ever think you could be more? Especially with someone like her in his life? It was foolish, it was crazy. He would never look at you the same so, why keep trying?

“So, what are we watching?”

“Oh, um… I don’t know. I’m not staying” You said, hiding the pain in your voice.

“But Michael told me-“

“I’m spending the night at Luke’s today. I totally forgot”

You rushed out of the living room and went straight to your room, letting the tears fall as you started packing for a few days. You needed to get away as soon as possible. You couldn’t handle staying here at the moment, it hurt too much.

Just as you were packing the last pieces of clothing, you heard Michael opening the front door. And surely, a few moments later he was pushing yours open.

“What do you mean you’re not staying tonight?” He barged in.

Your back was facing him, so you couldn’t see him, you didn’t want to see him, but he sounded hurt. Quickly, you wiped your tears with the back of the hand and tried to muttered something close to an unbothered tone.

“I’m going to Luke’s”

“You always go to Luke’s, are you two a thing or something? Because you seem to live there more than here”

You let out a small laugh, was he really that dense?

“There’s nothing going on between me and Luke-“

“Then why are you always in his place?”

“It’s none of your business”

“Well, Y/N it is. It is because I wanted you to spend the night because we rarely see each other anymore and now you’re ditching me again!”

He raised his voice a bit, clearly frustrated and confused. That alone made your anger take the best of you.

“Oh please, as if you really want me here”

Michael frowned “What does that suppose to mean?”

“Why did you invite her?”

“Veronica? She’s my girlfriend, I though-“

“I know that she’s your girlfriend, I get it. It’s just-“ You took a deep breath, trying not to cry or scream or both “It’s just that tonight was special, and I wanted to share that with my best friend. Only with my best friend. But I feel like everytime we try to do something together she’s always there and-“

“You don’t like her?”

“What? No, that’s the worst part. I actually think she’s great” You turned around and closed your bag, ready to leave “Michael I’m not going start a fight, I’m going to stay with Luke for a while. Don’t wait up”

You made your way out of the room, but before you could reach the door Michael’s hand grabbed you by the arm, making you stop.

“Michael” You warned “Let me go”

“No, wait. What do you mean with ‘that’s the worst part’?”

“I’m not having this conversation right now.”

“Yes, you are” Michael made you turn around. You were now looking at him in the eyes, he seemed hurt but you,, oh, you were in pain “Y/N, what is going on? You’ve been avoiding me lately, you’re not staying home, you don’t talk to me anymore, you’re dressing differently and sneaking out everytime I’m here. Is it because of Veronica?” You shook your head, slightly “Then what is it? Why are you pulling away from me?”

“Because it’s too damn hard!” You say looking away from him, unable to contain the tears any longer.

Michael’s eyes winded at your answer. His lips parted in surprise at your sudden outburst, wanting nothing more than to hold you but knowing you won’t let him.

“What?”

“You don’t get it, do you? No, you never did” You cry silent tears as your voice comes barely above a whisper “I can’t stay here because it hurts. Everytime I’m here she’s here too, like a reminder of everything I’m not. And I’ve tried-“ you choke “I tried to look more pretty, to be more ‘girly’ and feminine, losing myself every day. Hoping that maybe you’ll notice”

“Notice what?” Michael said softly.

You let out a breath.

“That I’m in love with you, you idiot”

Michael was taken aback by your answer, but he still wasn’t letting go of your arm. You love him? That’s what’s this all about?

“But I know you don’t feel the same. You never did and you never will. After all, I’m just Y/N. Just ‘one of the boys’ am I not?” He didn’t respond “It’s okay, I came to terms with that, I wouldn’t expect you to say something anyways” You released yourself from his grip and grabbed the last bag that laid on your bed “I’ll stay with Luke tonight and I’ll pick up my stuff in a few days”

Michael shook his head, as if he just realized what you just said “Wait, you’re moving?”

“What do you want me to do, Michael? Stay here? Pretend that things will be the same after this?! Go and have a movie night with your girlfriend and say that everything’s okay when I’m tearing myself apart in front of you?” You ask out of anger “I can’t do that, Michael. I need time”

“Y/N-“

“Why do you care anyways? I’m not a main character in your life. I’m not the type of girl you would fall for, or that you would consider feminine enough. I’m not pretty enough or funny enough and I’m tired of that. I’m tired of being an afterthought”

You turned around, already reaching for the doorknob when Michael’s hand wrapped around your waist, twisting you so your back was pressed against the door and your eyes were on him.

“Y/N, you were never an afterthought” He breathed close to you.

“Michael, what are yo-“

“Stay, please” But before you could say anything else, you felt his lips on yours.

The kiss was everything you dreamed it would be. Fast, rough and passionate. His hands traveled down your spine as he deepened the kiss, getting more needy by the second. Your hands flew to his neck, bringing him even closer, wanting to feel every part of him. You wanted to let yourself go, to fill these long needed desire. But you couldn’t forget about the girl waiting in the living room.

With all the strength you could manage, you pushed Michael away from you as the tears came flooding down again.

“What the fuck is your problem?!” You spat at him in anger “You can’t do that to me. You can’t just kiss me and expect to fix everything. Who do you think I am?” You could tell he was trying to say something, but you were not in the mood to listen “I won’t let you do this to me. I won’t let you do this to her. I’m leaving, Michael. Get your shit together”

And with that, you ran through the door and didn’t look back.

A few hours later, you were settled in with Luke in his apartment. When you arrived, you asked him to please not say anything, that you weren’t ready to talk just yet. He just nodded and let you in.

You cried on his shoulders for what it felt like an eternity. Your head was pounding and your voice was hoarse. You’ve never felt so heartbroken before.

“C-can I stay here for a while? Until I find my own place?” You asked him.

“Of course, darling” Luke said, kissing your head “Take all the time you need”

You stayed like that for a while. He comforting you through your silent tears until you fell asleep.

A week passes by and you are not feeling any better. You haven’t been sleeping well and you’re barely eating despite Luke’s pleads. Ashton and Calum showed up one day to check up on you, but you still refused to talk about it. Maybe you were embarrassed, maybe the memory of that kiss was too recent, too painful to talk about. Maybe you just didn’t know how.

One night you fell asleep on the living room, the TV working as the background noise that drowned your thoughts. You were peacefully dreaming for the first time in days when the sound of muffled voices woke you up. You were still laying in the sofa, but Luke was nowhere in sight. That’s until you heard him talk.

“I don’t think it’s a good idea”

“Please, I need to talk to her” the other man pleaded.

Michael was standing at the door. He looked like a complete wreck. His hair was undone and a bit greasy from ruffling it with his fingers way too much, his eyes were bloodshot and glossy, still fighting to contain the tears in front of his friend.

“Look, man. I love you, but she doesn’t need this right now and-“

“Let him in, Luke”

The two tall men turned towards you. You were standing behind the sofa, your eyes never leaving Michael’s. Luke simply nodded and headed to his room, giving you the privacy you needed.

“I’ll be there if you need me” He said to you.

You muttered a small ‘Thank you’ to him before fixing your gaze upon Michael. He was still frozen by the door, unsure on how to say what he has to say.

Letting out a breath, you decided to break the ice “Michael-“

“I broke up with her” He said in one breath.

“You what?!”

“The night you left,,, I-I broke up with her because I couldn’t keep lying to myself anymore”

“What do you mean?”

He hesitantly took a step closer to you, afraid that he was overstepping again.

“All this time, for years, I’ve been avoiding my own feelings. Tucked them away at the farthest corner in my closet, hoping that they’ll fade soon. I couldn’t cope with them, I was too afraid to.

‘“I told myself that I was being foolish, immature and downright stupid for thinking that the girl I love would love me back. How could she? She was beautiful, shared my sense of humor, my interests and she was extremely cool. I told myself that a girl like that could never want me. But, strangely, she did, as a friend. And I was content with that, at least I would have her be part of my life.

‘“So I hid my feelings until I couldn’t see them, but that didn’t mean that I couldn’t feel them. And every day I would remind myself that she was my friend and I was beyond lucky for that. I kept letting myself down on a daily basis, trying to keep the thoughts away, hoping that one day I could believe them. But I never thought of the consequences my actions had towards the girl.

‘“Y/N, when you left I felt like I couldn’t breathe. Like a vital part of me was missing and you took it away with you. And I deserved it, I truly did. Y/N, I was an asshole”

“Michael,”

“No, I was. Hearing you say those things about yourself, like you were broken and needed to be fixed, it broke my heart, darling” His voice broke at the end, fighting helplessly to contain the tears that were burning behind his eyes “I- I never meant for you to think that I didn’t love you for who you were. That you needed to change in order to get me to like you. You shouldn’t change for anyone, love, you are absolutely perfect the way you are. You always have been and always will be.

‘“Y/N, you were never just ‘one of the boys’, you are my best friend, my soulmate and the best thing that has ever happened to me by far. I’ve always known that, but I was just too much of a coward to let it show and I’m sorry.

‘“When you told me you loved me, god. Y/N, I’ve never felt so happy and confused at the same time! I couldn’t fanthom the thought of you loving me, it seemed surreal after so many years of telling myself that it was impossible, almost like a cruel joke. But you did, and I could tell by your eyes that it was true, and I hated myself for that. I hated the fact that I was hurting you instead of loving you like I wanted to. I hated the fact that you felt like you had to leave in order for you to fix what I broke. I hated that I ruined our first kiss by a stupid impulse because you didn’t deserve that. You deserve the world and I was so scared of the fact that I might’ve lost the chance to be able to give it to you.

‘“ I broke up with her the night you left. It wasn’t fair to you, to her or to me to keep denying my feelings any longer. And I know that I don’t deserve it, but I’m standing here to ask you for forgiveness. I’m sorry that I made you feel less than you are. I’m sorry that I broke your heart. I’m sorry that I wasn’t brave enough to tell you this the moment you walked out the door that night. I will keep apologizing for the rest of my life if necessary, Y/N. But I just- I just don’t want to lose you”

You were standing in front of him. Tears rolled down your cheeks as you took in everything he said to you.

He loved you.

He loves you.

And you love him.

Michael was staring at his feet, too afraid to look up and see the disappointment in your face. To scared to lose you and everything you meant to him. Maybe coming here was a mistake, maybe you don’t want to know anything about him anymore. And he deserved that.

“Well,” You finally say, swallowing the lump in your throat “You still owe me that movie night”

His eyes light up as he saw you smiling at him. He returned it by grabbing you by the waist and pulling you closer to him. Leaning so your lips could met again.

Smiling into the kiss, you swore that you will never let go of the other again.

[badatjokezz]

Haikyuu!! Rare Pair Fic Recs

i’ve been so hype about some Hq rarepairs lately now imma list some of my fav fanfics, mostly OiSuga mwehehe.... 

(probably gonna add some more in the future)

Oisuga (Oikawa x Sugawara)

1. Stuck in the Middle With You by overlymetaromantic

It's not the kind of blossoming relationship either of them would expect, but maybe, just maybe, it could lead to something good.

1. In which Suga and Oikawa run into each other on a late night convenience store run.

2. In which Suga and Oikawa inadvertently switch bags and end up with the other’s uniform.

3. In which Suga gives Oikawa the lecture he doesn't want but probably needs, and Oikawa might accidentally be a little in love.

4. In which Oikawa won't shut up about Suga, and Iwaizumi plays matchmaker just to make him stop.

5. In which there is not a date, and Suga likes spicy things much more than sweet.

6. In which Karasuno and Aobajousai hold training camps in the same neck of the woods, and the trip back proves to be more revealing than it probably should.

7. In which there might just be a future to this after all.

(Dis is so fluffy i might die)

2. moving on (growing up) by _helios (neocitz)

‘I’ll do it,’ Suga says, walking into their prep school and dropping his bag on the floor next to Oikawa. He shoves the melon bun and drink forward into Oikawa’s hands, and stands there looking down at him because he knows that he needs to not chicken out.

‘You’ll do what?’ Oikawa looks up through his glasses, eyes wide and confused as the other students stream in around them.

‘The fake dating thing, I’ll do it.’

‘Fuck. Yes.’ Oikawa says with a fist pump.

(It’s been AGES since i read Fake/Pretend Relationship fic, this one is goood)

3. how strange, to be remembered by venusintwelfthFandoms

"He is not formed of the type of dust that makes up stars. Suga is not the type of person that stays in the mind of one like Oikawa Tooru, ten years later. He is formed of the type of dust you shake off, the type that settles into the ground."

Ten years after Suga last steps off a high-school court, Oikawa recollects a "Mr. Refreshing" in a post-game interview, and Suga is left scrambling.

(Cute one-shot, Oikawa still remember Mr. Refreshing from Karasuno)

4. all the small things by Authoress for lemedy

Sugawara Koushi.

Oikawa’s brain supplies the name of the person standing at the other end of the aisle before Oikawa can even register him, attuned to spitting out facts about other volleyball players on a second’s notice, even after all these years. Karasuno High vice-captain. 174 cm…no, more like 176 now. Skilled at raising morale and bringing an element of surprise to their strategy. Troublesome. Refreshing. Setter.

The enemy.

(Single Dad! Oikawa, cuuutee ugh)

5. Win Some by kingdra (aroceu) for Icie

Tooru does not have a problem, its name is certainly not Sugawara Koushi, and he is not going to the Karasuno practices just to watch him. Regardless of whatever Iwa-chan says.

(High school romane~)

6. Even as bright as you are? by BKAKCANON

That night when he goes to sleep, he includes "the safety of fairies" on his prayers, making a promise to whoever was listening him, that he'd protect all the fairies and keep their secret safe forever.

[Where Oikawa meets Suga when they are kids and Oikawa believes Suga is secretly a fairy and decides he has to protect his secret all costs.]

(This is basically matches my headcanon)

7. getting to know you by oisugasuga

Suga feels like he’s back on the court then, his heart thudding hard in his ears… so hard he almost misses what Oikawa says. Unfortunately, though, he doesn’t.

"My, my. What a surprise," Oikawa Tooru says. And then… "Hello, Mr. Refreshing."

(Haven’t finished yet but DAMN I LOVE OIKAWA AND SUGA IN HERE, single dad! oikawa, and Suga babysitting oikawa’s kid, def slow burn. Imma follow this fic till death)

8. Dear Reader by hyirule

No one seems to read the paper anymore. But Oikawa likes to for the sports section. One day he finds himself reading a section called "Dear Reader" and finds a submission he can relate to.

Basically messages sent through a page on a newspaper brings to unlikely souls together, who maybe have more in common than they first thought.

(Cannon compliant, simple and... refreshing(?))

9. rest by shicchaan

Tooru looks at the sleeping person beside him as he waits for the lights change into green. The growing fringe of his husband started to cover his eyes but he can still see the beautiful birthmark under the silver haired's left eye.

(Established relationship, fluff fluff!!!)

10. long is the road (that leads me home) by ichweissnichtauch

He thinks about himself, deleting contacts from his phone and throwing coffee cups away without even looking at the string of numbers scrawled in Sharpie ink underneath, and he’s tired of hiding, tired of carefully treading the lines he’d drawn for himself all those years ago.

Just this once, Tooru wants— he thinks he wants to be brave.

Oikawa Tooru is not a stranger to wanting.

(like... 20% Oisuga but i like the way this story follows the Cannon till he get to Argentina)

11. It's Always Been About You by mintycarrots

Every time Tooru had envisioned meeting his soulmate, it was a confession of love, filled with tears of happiness and a lot of making out. It would be a faceless petite girl that would support Tooru in whatever he chose to pursue and would understand when Tooru prioritized volleyball over all else.

It was never a boy on the rival team.

(Soulmate AU)

12. a play in three acts by venusintwelfth

"The first time Sugawara Koushi sees Oikawa Tooru play, he thinks that if he wasn’t so set on volleyball, he’d do well in theater."

the first seijoh x karasuno match through the eyes of suga.

(Kinda poetic i guess, well written af)

13. colors by dazeful

Sugawara Koushi's colorful life as an archer.

(this is like the perfect oisuga one shot ive ever read)

___

IwaSuga (Iwaizumi x Sugawara)

1. And so the moon cried by iwriteinpenFandoms:

The hillocks are the domain of unearthly creatures. Creatures of rot and fog, of music and dance. Like ghosts in the night they travel without leaving footprints, they disappear in a flurry of long dresses and pale hair. Those who are fated to see them risk curses far worse than death. You may hear them, a giggle in the wind. You may smell them, the smell of the fog rolling in through the trees. You should pray you never see them. Iwaizumi Hajime is a simple man. He works a simple farm job and enjoys simple things. After one morning where he woke next to a perfect circle of death and only the memory of brown eyes and cold hands, he finds himself inexplicably drawn to the forest. Will the tales of his childhood play out with him at the center or will he have to disregard all reason?

(Danish Folklore AU)

2. Cry Just A Little by DreadfulMind

Suga was whistling a tune to himself as he opened the door to the bathroom, so he didn't hear the muffled crying through the door. But he could hear it clearly once he was inside. He heard the sharp sob of someone trying to stop.

"Iwaizumi?" He asked, "are you sure you're alright?"

(Simple but c u t e)

3. Generations by Karasuno Volleygays (ToBeOrNotToBeAGryffindor), mozaikmage

Professional sports blogger Sugawara Koushi writes an article about a volleyball match that bears special meaning to him and his former kouhai: a showdown between Kitagawa Daiichi and Yukigaoka Middle School, ten years after the teams faced off for the first time. He doesn't plan on capturing the attention of the world of sports journalism, and he certainly doesn't expect himself to end up having a thing for one of the coaches involved, one Iwaizumi Hajime.

(Time-Skip, I loved it)

___

KuroTsuki (Kuroo x Tsukishima)

1. Invictus by Chiru

Kuroo T. » So let me get this straight (gay?) Kuroo T. » You want me to pretend to be your perfect and fabulous boyfriend, so that your little freckled friend will stop trying to set you up with cute little highschool girls? Tsukishima Kei » yes Kuroo T. » Aha. Tsukishima Kei » you'll do it? Kuroo T. » I don't know. I missed the part where I get something out of it. Tsukishima Kei » you get to annoy me. Unfortunately Kuroo T. » Tempting, Tsukki, very tempting indeed.

(Fake/Pretend Relationship, some fluff, some angst, i read this in the middle of the night and cried, fortunately happy ending)

2. hold onto hope if you got it by nekolyssi

"Now, in the beginning of their third year of high school, the obnoxious hollering and incessant spirit of his teammates became normalcy to Kei. And now, normalcy is this. Weekly psych meetings. Pharmacy waiting rooms. Prescriptions. Refusal of prescriptions. More prescriptions."

(Not finished yet but yep prolly gonna put this one to one of those best haikyuu fics ive ever read. I wasnt so interested at first but i really like the idea of mental ilness etc, this is g o o d!!)

3. [KuroTsuki Fest Week 2017] Traces by Heartythrills 

Kuroo’s disappeared for a little over a week now, and suddenly a 4 year old who looks like him appears before Tsukishima’s apartment.

(Age regression, fluff)

4. I swear by xArtemisx

Like the shadow that's by your side I'll be there

"What are you doing here, Tetsu? It's cold." Kei asked softly. Tetsurou smiled. Hearing his name came out of Kei's lips is always music to his ears.

"Nothing. I just came to think that whatever memory we make, may it be happy or sad memories, the bright moon and the starry night sky is always there to be the witness. Did you notice?" The alpha answered and Kei nodded. He also noticed it.

"Yes, I did noticed it."

(I love agony and sad ending....)

5. Honeybee by ClosetGoblin

Tsukishima has trouble sleeping one night during a Third Gym Camping Trip. So, he takes his acoustic guitar and passes the time with some music, and gets a visitor. Maybe he doesn't mind Kuroo's voice as he does the screeching that Lev and Hinata call singing.

(Simple but sweet)

6. Say You Like Me by the_madame21

It's been three months. And Tsukishima Kei is going to see Kuroo Tetsurou.

(light angst and.. s m u t. Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamic)

7. trying to get to you by mytsukkishine

Everything came crashing down on Kuroo when Kei had left him alone with nothing but the moon shining down on him.

Wherein, Kuroo was struggling to move on and decided that he wouldn't mind being with Kei again.

(sad beginning? yes. sad ending? y e s. you’re a masochist? come get your juice)

8. Please Hold by ThemooncatFandoms

Kei was expecting Kuroo to do one of two things; Send a text to the office saying that they will have to call back another time and continue what they started, or excuse himself from Kei to answer the call, which was most likely. He shouldn’t have been surprised when Kuroo does neither of those things.

(short but hot. what’s hotter than quiet sex?)

___

Ushijima x Oikawa

1. This Insignificant Pride and Prejudice by Mysecretfanmoments, Pouler (poulerslashes)

Oikawa Tooru graduated high school with the burning desire to succeed in his college career. He'd hoped that might include taking down his arch-nemesis along the way, but when he finds that his college team hosts an offensively familiar face, he can't help but think that the universe might be conspiring against him. After all, what could be worse than playing on the same team as Ushijima?

(It was funny for me reading oikawa/ushijima fic with that “you should’ve come to Shiratorizawa” joke at first but somehow i found this one... endearing :3, cute poor ushiwaka)

___

Atsumu x Nishinoya

1. All the things I love about Yuu by KilluCoulomb

Atsumu Miya is fixated in Nishinoya. The way the boy acts, talks, plays. He Carefully observes from afar, but he slowly warms up to the Libero. Friendship becomes more and more intimate. Atsumu realizes Nishinoya is not that simple guy he met three years ago. And he loves it.

(pro volleyball players AU)

2. i'll see you then by noyabeans (snowdrops)

Nishinoya Yuu and Miya Atsumu build a rivalry and something more.

“Oh, it's Karasuno’s libero,” he says, mildly surprised to see Nishinoya’s face staring back at him from the brochure, grinning wide with his arms folded over his chest.

Contains spoilers for the current manga arc, up to chapter 380.