#I should just get a toy and it’ll be solved probably tbh

[faeoffline]

t sure is having impacts today, huh? (<- has thought so many horny thoughts today)

[murasaki-murasame]

I guess it’s time for me to put on my clown wig and make a complete fool of myself by dumping out all my last-minute thoughts about what I want and expect from the Sarazanmai finale, now that we’re just a few hours away from it.

Mostly this is just gonna be me trying to rationalize a way this could end happily for everyone involved even though I know full well the finale’s gonna murder me. [And tbh this is mostly gonna be me talking about Reo and Mabu lol]

lmao I have so many scattered and messy thoughts about all this, where do I even begin.

Most of all I’m still clinging onto the hope that Reo and Mabu will some way or another get revived in the finale. I’m bracing myself for the worst, though. I just feel like their deaths don’t even fit into the typical pattern of Ikuhara characters ‘dying’ as a way to transcend reality. Reo’s death in particular was so down to earth and casual that I don’t really think it’s satisfying or even bittersweet in the way that a lot of other Ikuhara endings are.

I also just think it seems really noteworthy that instead of getting sucked into the hell of never ending, beginning, or connecting, the ring representing Mabu’s place in the big circle of society bounced back and manifested in the real world to land in Reo’s pocket. And then Reo himself turned into the same sorta ring after he died even though he didn’t even become a kappa zombie or anything, and he just died a regular death. I get the feeling that Keppi might have somehow stepped in to stop them from completely being destroyed, considering what he said after Mabu’s death about how he was going to make sure to connect their desires to the future.

It just comes across like they’re in some sort of stasis where there’s still a chance to bring them back somehow. At the very least, I don’t really see what the entire point of them turning into rings would be other than that.

I’ve also been thinking for a while now that it might be Sara and Keppi who get the trademark ‘self-sacrifice/transcending reality’ Ikuhara ending, rather than any of the main trio or Reo and Mabu. I could even see it being a thing where they don’t even die, but they basically give up their place in the human realm and go back to the kappa kingdom permanently, which wouldn’t even be that sad of an ending for them in my opinion. There’s a lot of different ways it could play out, but I’ve got two ideas.

For one thing, I think Sara might be able to create her own dish of hope like Keppi can. He said he was the only one who can do that [I think he did, at least], but he’s also clearly been lying about being the ‘sole survivor of the kappa kingdom’ so I don’t really trust that, and the fact that the main dish of hope that we’ve spent most of the series working toward has already been used makes me think that another one might be introduced in the finale so that another wish can be made. It also seems really fishy to me that the scene with her and Haruka in ep10 revealed that Sara’s head ornament thing is apparently a type of plate. It makes me wonder if maybe there’s gonna be a reveal where we find out that she’s been hiding a dish of hope in plain sight, literally right on top of her head.

I could also maybe see a situation where Sara and Keppi transplant their own shirikodama into Reo and Mabu to bring them back, like what Kazuki wanted to do with Haruka in ep6. I’ve been wondering ever since that episode if that whole idea was going to come up again, at least. I think this could lead to the sorta situation I mentioned before where they have to give up their place in the human world, since as we also learned in ep6, giving up your shirikodama ejects you from the circle. But they might still be able to just go back to the kappa kingdom even after that so it might not be a big deal for them.

And along those same lines, maybe instead of Sara and Keppi both giving up their shirikodama, maybe Keppi will transplant the two halves of his broken shirikodama into Reo and Mabu. I guess it’s not really that different than the other option, but still. I think it’d at least be a nice bit of symbolism if they end up with two halves of the same shirikodama.

I’ve also been toying with the idea that maybe as part of the whole thing with how they deleted all the tweets from the ReoMabu twitter account, maybe if the finale involves them getting revived, the twitter account will basically be ‘rebooted’ and start posting all new tweets about their post-anime lives together. That’d be a really nice way to turn things around from how depressing the end of ep10 was. And it might be a good way to help balance out the fact that they probably wouldn’t get that much screen time in the finale even if they get revived, so giving them an epilogue story of sorts in twitter form could help make it feel more fleshed out.

In general I’m just gonna be disappointed if they stay dead in the finale, lol. I’m not going to make any harsh judgments or final opinions until the last episode airs, but I just think it’d be lame if their ending is just ‘they died, the end’. It’s obvious what sorta social commentary Ikuhara’s trying to make with them, but I feel like there’d be nothing subversive or interesting about commenting on how gay characters are ‘punished’ for being open about their feelings by just, y’know, effectively doing exactly that. Especially since it feels like Enta’s probably not gonna end up being able to properly tell Kazuki about his feelings either.

But the bottom line is that we just have to wait and see how it pans out. I don’t want to jump to any conclusions. And even if I end up disappointed by it, it wouldn’t make me hate Ikuhara as a content creator or as a person or anything. It’d just make me wish that more people would go about this kind of social commentary by giving gay characters happy endings where they get to be open about themselves.

Anyway, aside from the whole question of if this two will stay dead or not, I think the thing I most want out of the finale is some sort of a concrete explanation of how the ReoMabu manga fits into the whole timeline. We know for a fact that it’s canon to the anime timeline and isn’t some sort of an alternate universe story, but the more I think about it, the harder it is to figure out where it fits in.

It boils down to whether it happened before or after the anime, I guess, but both options don’t make complete sense. It seems more logical to assume that it happened before the anime, but it’s worth noting that the twitter account seems to end right before Reo and Mabu head off to the war, but they never acknowledge Sara at all in the whole twitter account, and I think there was even a tweet they made about Children’s Day ‘not being relevant to them’. Which seems like a hint that they haven’t even met Sara by that point.

But it happening after the anime comes with some more obvious inconsistencies. Though honestly I prefer this option, and I think a lot of questions about it could be solved if we assume it takes place post-anime with Reo and Mabu being revived but with some of their memories erased, and if we assume that the otters are completely defeated by this point.

I think the only thing that seems to concretely ‘date’ the manga is the absence of the Skytree, but I still think that it’s very likely the Skytree might just get destroyed in the finale as part of the big final clash between Keppi and Otter, so I think that’s not necessarily a contradiction. There’s also the fact that in the manga, the name and design of the police station is plate-themed instead of otter-themed, which on paper seems to indicate that it’s taking place before the otters took over, but it might instead indicate that it takes place after they’ve been defeated.

The whole thing with them not recognizing Sara at all in the final chapter of the manga also sticks out to me a lot now that we know Reo and Mabu used to be quite close with Keppi. It just seems like no matter where in the timeline the manga takes place, if they know about Keppi, they should probably be aware of who Sara is. But who knows. I just think it might be a hint that they get their memories of everything related to the kappas and otters erased after the anime.

I also think the whole premise of Sara being abandoned in the human world and conveniently adopted by Reo and Mabu seems more and more baffling the more we learn about them all as characters, and I think it might make more sense if it happens after the anime. Maybe Sara uses up so much of her power that her human form reverts back into being a baby. Who even knows! It’s weird in it’s own way to assume that the princess of the kappa kingdom just got abandoned in the human realm before any of this even happened.

The bit with her reuniting with her manager and Keppi also comes across as being pretty final to me. I get the feeling that she’s leaving the human world forever and isn’t going to be able to come back. Which makes me think that even if most of the manga takes place pre-anime, maybe the final chapter or two alone happens much later. Somehow. 

Then there’s the possibility of time looping being involved and there’s just too many ways it could all play out, lol. I just really want there to be a clearly understandable timeline of events once this is all done, otherwise it’s gonna nag at me forever.

If we find out that the manga happened pre-anime, I think they should have basically adapted it into an episode of the anime somewhere in the second half, to flesh Reo and Mabu out more. But we’ll see.

Also, before I forget, the Sarazanmai twitter account reposting the old PVs is making me wonder if we ever heard Reo’s line from his PV about assumptions being dangerous in the show itself. All of the other lines everyone said in that series of PVs ended up being used in the show itself, but I don’t remember that line of Reo’s ever coming up. I’m definitely just grasping at straws but it makes me hope that maybe it means it’ll be part of the finale. It at least gives me the mental image of him and Mabu appearing at the last minute to help fight against Dark Keppi and the Otters or whatever, and them being like ��BITCH U THOUGHT!!! >:^)’

I don’t really have as many concrete predictions for what’ll happen with the main trio, even though they’re gonna be the focus of the finale. Mostly I just hope this doesn’t end with Kazuki making a wish to turn back time. I feel like that wouldn’t really fit the whole narrative and message of this show. And honestly there’s only so much that could even be ‘fixed’ by turning back time. Like, sure Kazuki might be able to improve his personal relationships and maybe prevent Haruka’s accident, but would turning back time do anything about Toi’s family history and Chikai’s criminal ties? Would it do anything about the destruction of the kappa kingdom, or Mabu’s death and rebirth with a mechanical heart? Would it do anything about Enta’s presumably one-sided crush? It just feels like there’s only so much that could even be achieved with that sort of an ending, unless they completely undo everything. But going by how ep6 played out, I don’t think Ikuhara’s planning on that sort of ending. I just want this to end with the main trio having to move on with their lives and live with the consequences of how everything turned out.

But if we exclude the possibility of time looping and whatnot, I don’t really have any strong ideas about how things might turn out with them. But I guess all they really need to do is just save Toi from venturing outside the circle, and after that they can just deal with the rest of their lives together.

The big wildcard seems to be the fact that we’re finally gonna figure out the true meaning of the very first scene in ep1, which is still one big question mark. It does come across like it’s hinting at some kind of a time loop, but who knows. One way or another I feel like I might end up rewatching ep1 right after the finale. It’ll be interesting to see if it carries any additional meaning after all that.

And on the topic of ep1, even aside from that very first scene, I’ve always kept thinking back to how part of ep1 involved some narrative misdirection where we found out that in the scene at the car garage, ‘Sara’ was just Kazuki cross-dressing. It just seems interesting to me that that level of outright misdirection and lying to the viewer hasn’t really come up again, outside of Enta’s delusions. So I’ve just been wondering if it might ever come up again somehow. Though I also can’t help but hope that his cross-dressing will come up again one way or another since it kinda got unceremoniously dropped after ep6, so maybe I’m just grabbing at straws, lol. I do feel like it’d be a bit of a shame if there’s no actual deeper link between Kazuki and Sara, one way or another.

Though on that note, I do think it’s still pretty likely that if the ending involves her leaving the human realm, we might get an epilogue scene that shows that Kazuki’s basically taken her place as the local idol/TV presenter. Which I think would be a cute way to tie everything together.

In terms of happy epilogue type stuff with the main trio, I think it’d also make sense if we see them all playing soccer together.

I don’t really have much investment in shipping any of them, but part of me’s still holding out hope for a polyamory ending. But the more it goes on the more it does feel like Ikuhara doesn’t plan to really go anywhere super substantial with any of them in terms of their romantic relationships. Which is fine. I think it’d probably just be kinda sad if this ends with two of them getting together and one of them being ‘left out’. I’d rather it be an all or nothing type of thing.

Even the ep11 synopsis hints at the idea of them wishing for something at the end of all this, but I don’t know if that means they’ll literally make a wish with a dish of hope in the finale, after Kazuki just used his to save Enta. It might just be more about them finally bonding properly as a trio and resolving to keep living together.

But I do still think that Sara’s gonna make a wish on her own secret dish of hope, though. And if that happens I think the only things she’d really want to wish for would be related to saving Reo and Mabu, or turning back time completely.

All in all, as much as I want to go into this finale with restrained hopes and measured expectations, I still feel like this is the most stressed I’ve felt about an anime finale ever since Yuri on Ice, lmao. It’s gonna be really sad to see this all end. Even if we still have Migi’s manga adaptation and the second LN volume to look forward to afterwards.

[mentalcurls]

5. Cosa ti eccita?

Episode 5, we’re almost halfway throught the season! This time I talk about that thing Martino says, mother-daughter relationships and my journey to empathizing with Edoardo Incanti (for now) as well as the results of the Bechdel test for this episode, of course!

this episode start so nicely: Martino talking shit about each and every one of Eva’s friends

he manages to be racist, sizeist, a slut shamer, classist and sexist and misogynist all in one sentence with this lovely bunch of derogatory definitions; plus he’s an asshole in general and unsupportive of Eva

Elia is right there with him laughing at all that, probably Peccio is too, Gio maybe cracked a smile, but don’t think for a second that anything but Eva’s face and the thought of the conversation they need to have held him back (I’d like to take this opportunity to remind y’all Gio in this remake isn’t as interested in politics as Jonas is in the og)

this is , from what I read online (I only watched S1 months after it aired), one of those scenes that made people angry and I can see why. It wouldn’t have been enough for me to stop watching, but I get why some people did. I do agree that a scene like that shouldn’t not bother you. I am angry that things like the ones Marti says are accepted without comment, that nobody taught him better, that none of the characters have been taught better, much less better enough for any of them to shut Marti up and confront him about the shit he just said; Eva knows it’s wrong, but she doesn’t even try to explain why to him, because she doesn’t have the words to and she feels like it’s be pointless. Eleonora might have been able to confront him and shut him up with one of her vitriolic answers, but it would have been met most likely with “Oh, burn” comments by the other guys. It’s what it’s like in Italy and I don’t think a show that has professes to be as realistic as possible should be attacked for portraying the realistic comments dumb, ignorant boys make or for not forcing a scene when one of the characters is suddenly knowledgeable and eloquent enough to confront all the issues in Marti’s statement. This are 16 years old. I’m Italian and I was “woke”-ish at 16, kept up with politics even, but I don’t think I’d have been able to to it. What Skam Italia did, in my opinion, to counteract Martino’s words in this scene, is show us that his definitions are false, narrow-minded and based on prejudice by giving us an in into these girls lives. No-one can watch Skam and believe Marti’s words. Unfortunately, in a realistic show set in Italy, that’s all we can ask for.

this is also one of the first times we hear Marti discuss girls with the guys and it projects me straight to ep.1 of S2, when we have the “buste di piscio” comment. For all we love our baby deer Martino Rametta like it’s our collective firstborn and we would die for him, he’s a misogynistic fucker sometimes; thankfully by the end of S2 he’s grown up quite a bit (and I hope and pray that the combo of Filippo, Sana and Niccolò will make him grow even more by the next time we see him).

on a lighter note, IL PECCIO IS IN THIS SCENE, IN THE FLESH!

“Tell me what’s the problem” “I don’t have a problem” “Eh, me neither” YEAH guys, that’s why you’re so warm and affectionate

Giovanni, you hypocrite. You complained you don’t want to be one of those couples that are attached to the hip and you acted like Eva was always bothering you, so you told her to make friends; now she has friends, she’s stopped always catering to you and only you, and you’re gonna act mad? You wanted your cake, honey, now eat it!

so is that “You can stay, the guys are gonna go in a bit” thing Gio trying to build a bridge or him beginning the prep for the lie about wanting to go to dinner with Eva’s parents and then bailing on them to get back at her? On one hand, I don’t want to believe my dear Giovanni Garau would do that, on the other this particular set of circumstances with Eva brings out some of his worst traits

ok, I understand Eva and Eleonora want to know why Sana got mad and threw her drink at Laura to empathize with her properly, since they also are not her biggest fans, but their being really oblivious to Sana’s loud “stop bothering me!” signals

“I had to run away like an idiot thanks to you” actually, Silvia, he left you there like an idiot, while he went to be “the big bad man of the house who will solve all the problems” (btw was the house even his? wasn’t it Chicco Rodi’s party, why was it at Edoardo’s place?)

anyways, the reason Silvia is so mad is because what Sana did is so far from the prim and proper, low-maintenance girl Silvia is trying to be, in Edoardo’s eyes especially, and she’s terrified he’s gonna lump her in with her friend, who’s already difficult enough on her own because she insists on being different

aaaaand Silvia goes for the racist insult; at least this time the other girls tell her to calm down and Ele seems pretty ready to give her a piece of her mind, though she stops at the last minute cause she seems to think that while Silvia is this mad she’s a lost cause

SILVIA ACTUALLY GOT A TEXT instead of sending one, Sana would almost be proud

YAS SKAM ITALIA GIVING INFORMATION ABOUT CONTRACEPTIVES

I mean, sex ed is not bad about sexual health and contraceptives here but it’s always good to show “actual” kids being careful

of course, they’re only half careful, given that they’re thinking of unwanted pregnancies, while ignoring the very real risk of venereal diseases, given that they’re talking about unprotected sex with a boy who’s notoriously promiscuous

still, I want to stress how this is a conversation between girls only; the “burden” of thinking about contraception always falls on girls’ shoulders: Silvia doesn’t think for a minute Edoardo might bring and not mind using a condom and just knows she’s the one who needs to be worrying about contraception; Eva took the pill and is now using the ring so we know she’s the one who’s been taking care of contraception in her relationship with Gio, too. It takes two to tango ladies, so why the fuck do we excuse male half of the couple from this part of sex??

honestly, it’s midday so Eva should get out of bed, but that piece of crostata isn’t the kind of thing I’d wake up for

oh, what a beautiful mother-daughter relationship! I’m kidding, but also not. It’s obvious Eva’s mum is not at home much, but she makes an effort to be there as much as she can: she keeps up with her grades, she badgers Eva so she’ll study and when she has some free time even offer to revise together, she brings her breakfast in bed, she’s there to listen when Eva confides in her. She probably feels bad she’s not up to date with Eva’s personal life and guilty that she’s not there for her daughter as much as she wants to be. And Eva screams at her like a proper teenager, but then she does a beautiful thing and actually apologizes, saying the words “I’m sorry”, and despite still lying she tells her mom a bit about herself (sure, there’s external pressure for her to do so in the form of Gio and of her new friends who want to come by her place, but still), she opens up, she communicates, which is really good cause she seems to have good parents, who for example don’t freak out at the mention of a boyfriend but ask her first and foremost if she’s happy

and Eva, what’s the point of saying “Yes, I’m happy” and looking anything but? You be thankful your mom takes it for embarrassment, cause you were not convincing

aaaand Gio hasn’t gotten any lately because of the fight so he’s horny, cute

Gio meets Eleonora! And it’s absolutely uneventful, but then again, it would be: even considering Marti’s classification, she’s not the weirdest and she’s the least interesting out of the girl squad to Gio, cause he’s already getting some, so he doesn’t care that she doesn’t put out

what is interesting is Gio’s worried face when the free clinic gets mentioned: dude, if maybe you were more involved in contraception and collaterals in your own relationship, then maybe your first reaction wouldn’t be worry

the “Prima volta?” lady cracks me up (also, in case anybody doesn’t know, she’s the same person that asks Marti if Nico’s bottle of antidote is a bomb in S2 ep. 7 and - I’ve read somewhere - the stylist of the series)

when Silvia huffed and looked put out at the mention of the clinic on the bus, I was unsure whether it was a fear thing or a “tsk, plebeians” thing, but it appears she’s genuinely scared: girl, why? I get being embarrassed, uncomfortable, but she’s more nervous than if she was taking the maturità exams

Silvia is not mad at anybody, much less Sana, because good, low-maintenance girls don’t get angry, don’t cause commotions, they’re graceful and compassionate and forgiving and nuisances simply don’t exist for them

the doctor is actually so helpful! in the og she was 99% comic relief, 1% actually helpful, but this doctor is nice and warm and encouraging

Silvia’s terrified/disgusted face when presented with a dildo, that’s not a girl who looks ready to have sex

at least Fede seems puzzled but interested

Silvia just seems so dumb in this scene: she doesn’t speak for herself, she is absolutely floored when faced with a sex toy and a condom, she seems to think that taking the pill for to days actually works as contraception, she doesn’t think of asking Eva to use her home to meet up with Edoardo before telling him yes... tbh she almost looks like she’s a bit drunk

still, she just knows how to manipulate people to get her way. She even brings the doctor on her side.

“Do you think it’ll hurt?” considering how unsure and worried you are, YES

Eleonora changing topics as soon as her sex life is brought into question 😏 but also, her lost face when Eva says sex shouldn’t hurt except maybe a bit at the beginning

THANK YOU ELEONORA SAVA FOR SAYING THE IMPORTANT THINGS THAT NEED TO BE SAID

the disgusted face Silvia makes at the word “turned on”???

ok, how good is it to see girls in media talking about sex and about their fantasies without any shaming whatsoever? (The comparison between getting turned on by clothes and animals played for comedy is a bit unfortunate, but imo it doesn’t ruin the positive, accepting mood of the scene)

*Regina George voice* Silvia, stop trying to make jello happen!

ok, so, my secondhand embarrassment levels are always through the roof during this scene

look how taken aback Eva’s mom looks when she sees Edoardo! He definitely looks nothing like the third year boy she pictured when she imagined Eva’s boyfriend, I mean, she was thinking more along the lines of Laura’s boyfriend, that nice boy Giovanni she’d met that one time…

oh, but poor Edoardo too, he’s planning for a one night stand and suddenly he has to deal with parents?? This was not the plan. Does this annoying, kind of pretty girl who wants to sleep with him think he’s her boyfriend or something? What a nightmare. Oh, wait, she’s not even here, is she toying with him in a misguided attempt at playing hard to get? Wait, she wanted him to go to dinner with her parents? Is this some kind of prank? Did he get the wrong house? WTF

AND THE DAD ARRIVES OH GOD when fathers get involved the situation usually escalates, you can feel Edoardo going “Nope. Nope. Think, Edo. Get out of this NOW.”

ok, the redhead he vaguely remembers from the party, great, now can she explain him what’s going on? No, she’s telling him he needs to leave and slamming the door in his face. (Also, first appearance of the boss Eva we see at Silvia’s 80s party in S2, hello gorgeous!)

and Silvia is hiding on the stairs. Which is cute and not at all “sfigate allucinanti”-like (see ep.3). Just like telling a guy to come over but not at your actual place isn’t. It’s fine having to ask your friend to borrow her place, having to sneak in, having sex in a house you don’t know and where you need to be careful not leave signs of your presence, on the bed where your friend sleeps, with her photos on the wall, her knick-knacks on the shelves, her clothes in the closet. It’s totally cool. Even when the guy you’re having sex with is polite and gets there a few minutes early, so he accidentally meets your friend’s parents and nearly panics and definitely learns this is not your place, you know, that’s stuff that happens and it’s absolutely cool. He just calls you crazy.

so really, I never thought I’d see the day, but I empathize with Edoardo Incanti and I understand him ghosting Silvia (not the whole “Who are you again?” conversation, just the ghosting) because she’s clearly in too deep, he’s know that since her first string of texts, and she’s doing borderline creepy things like borrowing her friend’s house to have sex in? And Edoardo is not interested in a girlfriend, much less a stalker, so he just goes for the path of least resistance and disappears, hoping she’ll get over it soo. (Except of course she doesn’t and she confronts him, so really, what’s the best way not to give her any stupid hope? Being cruel. And that’s what he does.)

back to Eva, Gio cancels and Eva TURNS HIS OWN “Non ho parole “ BACK ON HIM how wild

side note, I honestly really really would have wanted to see Paola’s reaction when, at some point, Eva tells her she was dating Giovanni; I just can’t decide what she’d think

Bechdel test: the episode passes the test. We have Eva and Ele pestering Sana about the fight at the party, then the two of the and Silvia discussing the pill, the conversation about Sana’s father’s patient’s restaurant outside the gyno’s office at the clinic and finally there’s a good 75% of the conversation in Eva’s bedroom, between Silvia, Ele, Fede and Eva herself, that actually passes the test. There’s just a couple of mentions of Edoardo in the middle.

This post is part of my complete series of meta about Skam Italia season 1.  If you’d like to read more of my thoughts about the other episodes, you can find the mastepost linked in the top bar on my blog under SKAMIT: EVA. Cheers!

[atopearth]

Mystic Messenger Part 9 - Saeran/Ray/Unknown Route

Yayyy! Ray/Unknown route!! Talking to Ray breaks my heart so much though💔 Any time you express the tiniest amount of consideration or care for him, he gets so touched. It makes me feel so sad that he has never experienced something so simple. It’s so sad that even though Rika is using him, he feels like he’s useful here. It’s so sad that he hates 707 so much.. It’s so sad that….I hope we can protect him properly in this route.

When he talked about the pot plant that somehow grew two stalks when it wasn’t meant to, and how there’s the stronger stalk and the weaker stalk, you immediately knew he saw himself and Seven in it. How Seven is the healthy one living happily because he discarded Ray the weaker one, and so as revenge, he broke off the stronger stalk to use it as fertiliser for the weaker one. That simple analogy really shows his attitude towards Seven. Why do these twins have to suffer so much…. It’s pretty heartbreaking getting Ray’s hearts, since with the RFA, it’s mostly words that would hurt V and 707 and when it’s with Ray himself, I feel like I’m constantly feeding his insecurities and his sadness, making him reliant and obsessed with the heroine. But I guess this might be the best way to try and save him right now. But really, it was so kind of Ray to not give the elixir to the heroine because he doesn’t want her to be hurt by the side effects like he does. I wanted to cry seeing how considerate he is and yet he could never experience that consideration from anyone else.

I hate seeing Seven sad.. his phone call when he got told by V to not chase the hacker anymore was so down :( He seemed so heartbroken.. I hope V works up the courage, the responsibility and understands the need this time to tell Seven about Saeran.

Sometimes I can’t help but think that Yoosung is such a brat though, he tells people that they don’t understand him but it’s not like he puts in effort to understand the other side either, so what right does he have to criticise them? I hated how he said because his parents gave birth and raised him that they should understand him better or whatever, he’s the one that’s clinging to Rika and not letting anyone change his thoughts. He’s the most stubborn one that won’t listen to anything and he’s ughhh. His mum is just really worried about him and he says stuff like that on the chat, sigh. He says he’s disappointed in his mother for not understanding that he doesn’t want to forget about Rika and that he wants to find the truth, but counselling doesn’t mean he’ll forget about Rika, it’ll just help him organise his feelings, the only one that can change whether he forgets about Rika or not is himself, not a counselor. Frankly, I’m super disappointed in Yoosung, not only is he super annoying about Rika, but he has no consideration for others because he gives it all to Rika. Usually, I’m able to empathise with Yoosung to a certain extent and just not agree with him, but this time I have to admit, I really don’t like him and am extremely disappointed in how he is dealing with this. I’m disappointed that he’s spent most of his life with his mother and yet HE can’t understand her feelings and thoughts about this. Now, I’m annoyed about his whining lol. Rant over. On another note, Zen is just like a caring but naggy older brother hahaha, he’s so kind, too bad Yoosung doesn’t always appreciate it.

I am so happy for Zen that he got a main character role though, that’s great!! Gotta say that I was laughing along with Zen when Jumin said he wanted to try cross stitching because it’s just so hard to imagine Jumin doing that lmaoo. Tbh, I’ve always empathised with Rika to a certain extent but whenever I see and think about how she’s using Saeran and torturing him to get her personal revenge against V, I can’t forgive her and probably never will just because of how innocent and tormented Saeran has been all his life and yet she uses that and causes even more pain and torment to him physically and mentally! It’s absolutely disgusting and I just can’t bear to see Saeran suffer anymore! It hurts even more when Seven thinks that everything he’s doing is helping Saeran have a peaceful life when he’s actually suffering so much…

When V was talking about the daffodil that only withered more in sunlight and could only face the soil and take the nutrients from the flowers around it, I felt really sad… Daffodils are apparently Rika’s favourite flower..not that I really care for her but she’s important to saving Saeran since he’s so reliant on her.. I think the biggest mistake V made and continues to make in the routes is that he tries his best to save everyone by himself but he doesn’t realise that everyone is already hurting and that maybe, being hurt is better than knowing nothing and doing nothing. He also underestimated how difficult of a problem this was I guess and really should have let everyone else help him since it wasn’t just simply his and Rika’s problem anymore from the moment she dragged Saeran and other people into this.

It took some convincing but it’s true that in terms of dark energy, Yoosung is the one to teach that to Zen for his new character hahaha. It’s so funny when Yoosung starts talking all deep and poetic about the hopelessness in life for Zen to learn, tbh I relate a bit but it’s still lmao hahaha. Ray is so sweet for making a drink that looks and smells like that elixir for the heroine so that she won’t have to take the real thing and feel the pain from it. He’s already so busy enough and yet he’s caring about her so much.. Does he even sleep? I’m so worried about him..

OMG *SQUEALS* THE HEROINE KISSED HIM AND HE RAN AWAY!! He’s so adorable omg, I’m glad he’s starting to believe in the heroine more than Rika and that things might need to change, and that maybe he should leave this place. I’m so excited for a happy future and I’m so happy that the heroine is there for him but so mad that Rika is constantly manipulating him! Btw Elizabun the 3rd is the best, I can’t fault Zen for laughing so hard at Yoosung’s imitation of Jumin lolol. I mean, there was literally a phone call with Yoosung and he was talking about how pet bread is great and that croissants are popular but they leave crumbs across the table so you’ll have to constantly clean up its mess lmaooo. Save me, it’s so funny. It’s even more hilarious when Zen finally makes a breakthrough with his character on White and it’s so good that it’s making Yoosung scared hahaha!

As for Ray… It was expected that Saeran would appear considering the “cleansing” Rika did to him. Although he looks down on Ray’s personality and his tastes in the heroine, I think the fact that he thinks of the heroine as a toy to play with when he’s bored shows that despite their differences, there is some sort of feeling or affection Saeran has for the heroine. Omg… Those creepy Saeran emojis in the chatroom are so creepy!! They’re so scary! Scarier than the person himself lmao. But yeah, I’m scared for the heroine considering how crazy Saeran is. I absolutely hate Rika though, seeing Saeran scream for help from Seven pained my heart so much, I’m on the verge of crying. Just because Rika got hurt and is obsessed with revenge, she drags Saeran down with her, digging up all his negativity and trauma just to achieve her objective. She’s so disgusting and any kind of charity she’s done before does not cancel this out. Saeran’s suffered so much already and yet she has to continue tormenting him for her own personal benefit, it hurts so much to see Saeran like this. Please save him, Seven!! Saeran doesn’t want to hurt anyone, he’s just been manipulated into thinking that being “crazy” like this is the only way he can protect himself from others. I’m so mad that V hasn’t asked the others for help when it concerns them so much, especially Seven. He can’t solve everything by himself especially when Rika has her own army of believers! It isn’t just Rika that is involved, it’s Saeran too and he needs help!! Sigh. I’m so frustrated and sad that Saeran has to continue to suffer. And things are just getting worse because their prime minister father is on the hunt for them…

My heart is breaking so much… Saeran’s still treating the heroine as terrible as ever but Ray came back for a bit!! That means there’s definitely still hope! And despite everything, just like Rika said, I think that Saeran keeps the heroine there not just because he needs someone weak to show that he is a strong personality, but also because somewhere inside of him, even if he treats her like a toy, that’s how he’s showing his love for her. He loves her but he can’t believe in her love and so he can only treat her in this way to be close to her but also distance himself from her so that he won’t ever be hurt again. He loves her but is scared that he’ll get abandoned again, just like Saeyoung did to him when they were young. For Saeran, being abused by Rika or his mother was unbearable but still acceptable because they never abandoned him and that’s all he wants, someone that won’t dispose of him…. A part of him wants to believe in the heroine and that’s why I guess he’s doing all these things to kinda test whether she’ll stay with him no matter what.

I’m glad that the heroine got through to Saeran. Seeing him admit to his wrongs and apologise to the heroine that knew what he was thinking all this time… Knowing that despite all the depravity and hatred he shouted at her, he was the one he was truly shouting at, he was the one that was really hurt from all this, rather than the heroine. But the most saddening thing is that he thinks that the heroine only really cares about Ray and that she should live happily with him, when really, she loves Saeran himself and wants to protect all of him so there’s no way she only wants Ray! So, don’t disappear Saeran😢😢

I’m so proud that Zen told V to stop being so frustrating and thinking that everything has to be his responsibility! It is to an extent but blaming himself won’t get them anywhere! Seven is in trouble with his evil dad and V is still wallowing in where did things exactly go wrong! Best thing was when Zen said that the only person who can love Rika enough and correctly is herself. In the end, even if V loved her the “correct” way, if Rika doesn’t believe it or accept it or think that she deserves it, it won’t work out. The only person responsible for Rika is Rika herself, the only person that could truly help her was herself. Sure, V might have been able to help her if he did things differently but there’s no guarantee considering how her thoughts were, so really, no matter what he does, things could still have ended up like this. So, get a grip on yourself V and save Seven and Saeran with everyone in the RFA now!

It’s so wonderful to see Saeran and the RFA communicate and co-cooperate to save Seven from their father that kidnapped him. It was so heartwarming and sweet to see Saeran capable of being so happy and surrounded by others. It’s also great that he can finally live back in the light now that their father’s evil schemes and stuff he’s done has been brought out to be seen by the public. I’m glad the heroine was able to save Saeran, I’m still so thankful and happy about that.. the only sad thing is that we never got to see where Seven is. But as Saeran says, the twins are both really strong people that have been able to survive in the most dire of situations, so I’m sure Seven is all right. As for V and Rika, didn’t think Rika would “come back” so easily but she did so, yay I guess? As long as she’s not tormenting people anymore, I’m glad lol.

Overall, I’m pretty satisfied with Ray/Saeran’s route, I just wished that I could see Saeran and Seven happy together since that’s what they’ve always wanted and what Seven worked hard for.. but as long as Saeran is happy, Seven would be happy so it’s all good haha. It was a long but eventful 10 days. So many things happened but it was a good journey. Felt like the heroine had less of a personality this time around but that’s cool, since it was all about Saeran and that’s mostly what I wanted haha.

Now, to update my most favourite to least favourite routes! It would be 707, Saeran, Zen, Jaehee, V, and then Yoosung and Jumin are probably around the same to me tbh lol. But yeah! Now we just have to hope for a Vanderwood route I guess haha! Although, a Rika route is probably more likely lol.