#I say this every year honestly SMH I MISS PRODUCTION....

[hitomishiga]

went and saw my old high schools production 2nite... God am I Feeling Things...good things...bad things............i miss it i miss playing i miss being in the band i miss performing the final concert smh i only did it once why

[hopekiedokie]

Mall is Life | INTRO : She’s Broke, He’s Broke, We’re All Broke!

Summary: Your dad thinks it’s best for you to pay off the credit card that you just maxed out. Meaning, it’s time for you to finally get your very first job…at the mall. As a true blue spoiled daughter from a very rich family, what could possibly happen? Form a labour union and overthrow the oppressive government with 7 other underpaid and overworked guys??? Or maybe just form a bond with them and have the best time of your life?

Pairing: bts x reader

Genre: mall!au, lowkey a sitcom, fluff, eventual angst, and a whole lot of pure crack

Word count: 5.3k+

Notes: As I’m doing final rewrites for this, I overheard my co-teacher call one of our students a “crack” and I honestly have never related hard to a student. Anyways, transferring this from gdocs to tumblr took sooooo long. I literally aged 10 years. I didn’t think writing in this style would be such a pain so I really do hope you enjoy this! Keep safe and hang on while the world still seems like it’s on its way to destruction.

Posted on: 8th of Jan, 2021

— • masterlist | Character Guide | INTRO | next • —

Red

Red is all you see.

Your vision has been clouded by the colour red since the moment you stepped inside the mall.

Sale season is upon you and red tags are everywhere!

Buy one get one for a girlfriend sized “boyfriend t-shirt”, a free cookie if you get 7 drinks, 5% off on your next purchase from Kucci and… Gasp! 75% off for a light sabre handheld immersion blender???

Do you even cook or watch Star Trek or whatever it’s called? Heck no.

bUT IT’S MORE THAN HALF OFF and it looks cool so might as well get it.

Right?

You saunter off towards the sights of free or marked down signs to start making damages.

“Ehem.”

The sound of your best friend, Taehyung’s voice, freezes you in place and you feel like a kid caught in the act of stealing a candy.

Literally, you have both your hands in front of you with your mouth open and watering.

“Just what do you think you’re doing?” His hands are placed on his hips, like a slightly inconvenienced Karen.

“Oh, uh...I was just, you know!? About to admire the general splendour!”

He was like, ya right sweetie.

“Shut up. This isn’t a Jane Austen book.”

Well, one can dream.

And lowkey, you were kinda expecting him to not get the reference.

…or even understand what you just said.

Damn.

You really need to give Taehyung some credit.

He is after all, your best friend and that is an achievement in itself.

“Focus, y/n. FOCUS. We’re here on a mission, don’t get distracted.”

Ugh, right.

Reality hit you again like a ton of bricks.

“And as if you can afford anything! Unless, you’re in for some service water.”

You scoff hard.

Though he isn’t lying.

See, the thing is, your family is rich.

Like rich 𝑹𝑰𝑪𝑯.

Like “rent a whole stadium for your dad’s morning run” rich

You, alone, though?

ʰᵉ ʰᵉ ʰᵉ

“Sorry, you’re absolutely right. We’re here for one thing only and that is to find a job! We’re not leaving until we get one.”

And that’s what you did for the next two hours

Job hunting

You might be wondering, “If we're so rich then why are we looking for a job?”

Well kids, let me tell you a quick story.

Here’s what happened

A week ago, you had probably the most embarrassing yet most eye opening experience of your life.

You were shopping

(like duh do you have anything else to do?)

And your credit card got…

Wait for it…

…………….

🚫DECLINED🚫

◉.◉

Like, that can happen????

Next thing you know, you’re on the phone with your dad and he is MAD

You don’t even know why he is so pressed about it.

Okay, so you maxed out one of his seemingly endless supply of credit cards.

BIG DEAL.

It’s not like he lost a bunch of money.

Maybe to a normal person, yeah…

BUT to you guys?

Come on! He can earn that money back in like two days.

Besides, he always goes on saying that he'd willingly give everything for you, his one and only princess.

bUT NOoOOoo! He has to teach you to be rEsPoNsIbLe with money! You need to be a 𝒔𝒆𝒏𝒔𝒊𝒃𝒍𝒆 𝒑𝒆𝒓𝒔𝒐𝒏.

"What? You think I'm a money making machine here?"

Well, tbh he kinda is.

"You think money grows on trees?"

Well, technically, money is paper so...ya it kinda does.

"I don't slave around just so you could plunge yourself in all of your whims!"

Uh, actually.

You kinda do though if we refer back to your whole willingly-give-everything-to-you shtick.

So that wasn't real, huh?

ＡＬＬ ＭＥＮ ＤＯ ＩＳ ＬＩＥ.

smh

Taehyung, on the other hand...

Well, his mother’s old but rich sugar daddy just recently passed away and unfortunately all his money and prized possessions were inherited by his one and only beloved son.

All they got was a couple of stupid jewelry, which did allow them to pay for a new (less glamorous) apartment, but still

Eh.

What a complete disappointment.

11+ years of being a sugar baby, all for nothing.

So now it’s back to the slums for the both of them.

Sad reacs for a fallen warrior.

I’m talking about Tae’s mother, not the sugar daddy...

THOUGh rip for him. Uh,,,,

He’ll be missed? I guess???

(1 like of this post = 1 respect for him)

DW about his mother though. She doesn’t seem quite fazed by it.

“This is why if you find a rich old bastard, make sure he doesn’t have any kids. That or have an affair with their kid. Oh well, on to the next one.” She told you and Tae during the funeral.

It’s been three months since.

She’s currently working at a hair salon and also,,,,

Taehyung thinks she’s seeing someone again cause she’s been using her designated “𝑠𝑒𝑑𝑢𝑐𝑖𝑛𝑔” parfum.

WHICH you still don’t know if you should be impressed or be concerned about.

Nonetheless, you respect the hustle of this woman. ✊✊✊✊

Unfortunately, her efforts are still not enough to satisfy their expensive needs so that brings us to the present situation.

Actually, it couldn’t have been more perfect though!

You and your best friend coincidentally just happen to be in the same dilemma.

Kind of

Well, not really

Plus, it’s not really the most pleasant circumstance bUT STILL

The point is, you’re in this together and that’s enough for the both of you.

:’)

“Ugh, this totally blows.” Taehyung says as you both sit on one of the food court booths.

“Which one, us not getting any jobs yet or the fact that we’re hanging at the food court?”

“Get used to it, princess. Honestly, you'll find that the food here isn't as disgusting as you think they are." He says as he fishes for his phone in his man purse.

"Well, at this rate, I won't be able to get used to it since I sTILL haven't found a job. Why are the good stores so demanding? Like, an intensive classroom and in-store training only to have a possibility to get hired??? To think that I'm a loyal Louie Button customer!"

(A/n: This is actually a real procedure for Louis Vuitton, at least in my own experience. But I only applied and never went through with the training cause I figured that it just ain't for me.)

You continue ranting your little heart out about how you could sue these stores for unfair treatment.

Taehyung, though, has long tuned you out and has pointed his full attention to his phone.

This is turning out to be a lot more disastrous than what he anticipated.

So he needs to phone a friend in.

Orrrrr a couple.

He's getting desperate, okay??

The entire spring collection was practically screaming out to him when they entered Kucci.

He's a 𝓚𝓾𝓬𝓬𝓲 𝓫𝓸𝔂 through and through.

He hasn't missed a single Kucci season collection in years.

IN YEARS, PEOPLE!

He can feel his right eye twitch at this blasphemy.

"I'm telling you! These stores are absolutely ungrateful-hEY! Are you even listening??"

"No. I thought that was obvious the second I whipped my phone out."

( ͠° ͟ʖ ͡°)

Rude

He didn't even try to deny it.

"You know, I really don't need you to be mean to me right now."

"Sorry y/n but this…" He lifts his phone up, "is more important right now."

What could possibly be more important than your current problem??

If you don't leave today with any form of productivity, you just might have to sell the entirety of your closet.

And we all know that ain't happening.

"By 'that', you mean?"

His phone vibrates a couple of times, indicating that he just received a bunch of messages.

He instantly opens them, disregarding you once again.

I-

Seriously, thIS bOy!

"Hello???? I'm still here and we're still hideously unemployed!"

He looks up to you with a smile that seems a tad bit too eerie.

Okay, this is somewhat alarming ngl.

"I called in some reinforcements."

Reinforcements... Huh?

What's that supposed to mean?

You stare at him with scrunched brows and mouth slightly agape.

And as if on cue, a male voice rings from behind you.

"Tae! We're here!"

"Jimin! Seokjin hyung!"

Ohhhhhhh

*Looks at the camera*

Them.

♫︎DUN DUN DUN♫︎

For everyone's information, Taehyung grew up a hair away from the poverty line.

He was in his preteen years when their family found success through his mother's sugar daddy.

He didn't grow up rich whICH there's NOthing wrong WiTh THAT.

A person's financial status does not define them.

Taehyung's friends, however, already have a collective definition in your head.

One word

༼ つ ◕◡◕ ༽つ MESS™

♫︎DUN DUN DUN♫︎

A hot mess you are so not willing to become a part of.

Tae keeps them away from you because he knows that they are not the type of people you would associate yourself with.

Which is why you've never met any of them.

...Until today.

♫︎DUN DUN DUN♫︎

Guess being besties with a broke Taehyung means it only makes sense that you finally meet them.

♫︎dUN dUn- ok that's enough of that.

"We got the Code 17 message. I can't believe I'll ever get that from you. This is history, man! We need to celebrate!" Someone says accompanied by what sounds like someone wiping a window.

You look at Taehyung with a very displeased look.

May god and every higher being out there give you strength.

He doesn't even look the slightest bit bothered by what might be one of the boldest crossovers to ever happen.

Also, "Code 17"??? Wth?

"What's wrong? You never ask to meet at the food court… And who's this with--oh." A different, softer voice talks this time.

"You guys remember my bestie, right? Y/n? Well, I think it's time you guys finally meet."

From behind you, Seokjin and Jimin share a slightly wary yet excited look.

Jimin, being the natural people lover that he is, instantly thinks that he's about to have another best friend.

From what he's heard from Taehyung, you two are slightly alike, being a total softie.

So don't be surprised if a montage of things like the two of you going on picnics at the mall garden or watching the premiere of the next Disney movie plays in his head.

Seokjin, on the other hand, being the woman lover that he is, instantly thinks that he's about to score big time.

He's heard a lot about you from Tae but the only thing that stuck (and pretty much the only thing that matters) is that you are HELLA rich.

$ ℂ𝕙𝕒𝕔𝕙𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕓𝕒𝕓𝕪 $

So are we even surprised that what he imagines is him breezing through the luxury section of the mall, with his personal butlers in tow, and having everyone swoon at him?

“Y/n,” Taehyung gives you a pointed look as if telling you to be nice. “Meet Seokjin hyung and Jimin, two of my other best friends.”

Alright, you heard that these people work here at the mall.

So you’re gonna have to suck it up if it means being stuck with them for god knows how long.

You just hope they have some level of bearableness.

(Oh and some form of acceptable fashion taste too please, thank you very much!)

As much as you're not in the mood to smile, you still plaster on the sweetest one you can muster and turn around to face the two----

Oh

(o.O)

oh oh oh oh ho ho ho ho

Hello

hELLO indeed.

One of them has a white button up with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, black slim fit trousers, and a brown newsboy cap like a cherry on top.

He's also wearing a brown apron with a small name tag that says 𝓙𝓲𝓶𝓲𝓷.

The other guy's more casual with his baby pink t-shirt, french tucked into his black ripped skinny jeans.

Personally, you wouldn’t really call them amazing outfits…

bUT SWEET BABY JESUS ARE THEY DOING THINGS.

GREAT THINGS

(Tbh maybe it’s their handsome faces that do it for you)

"Hi, I'm Jimin! It's very nice to finally meet you."

He extends his hand and you take it in a heartbeat because my god that smile.

Wooooooooooo

Now, that's what greets you into heaven.

"Tae says a lot of good things about you and I think- oof."

Cute pink shirt guy (rudely) shoves him to the side.

Jimin almost topples to the ground and it makes you want to stand and check up on him.

The poor cutie.

For some reason, you feel like Taehyung and pink shirt guy get along well.

"AND I'M Seokjin!"

This time, Seokjin swiftly takes your hand without any warning which leaves you feeling flustered.

“Umm… Nice to meet you..?” You manage to politely croak out.  

He gives your hand a kiss and then drops you a sultry wink.  

Thank god you're sitting right now.  

You'd be a lying fool to say that that didn't make your knees weak.  

But ngl, that’s a face that definitely greets you into hell.  

Like, no offense to his handsome face but you are sure there’s something completely devious going on underneath.  

No one can change your mind on that.  

"OKAY! Enough introductions, we’ll have plenty of time for that later... Where are the others??”  

“Hoseok hyung said that he's with Jungkook and they're on their way to get Namjoon hyung." Jimin says as he fixes his hat that slightly slid off.  

"Well, they better hurry!"  

Taehyung DEFINITELY did not have any reasons to cut your introductions off.  

He just did not like how you are practically drooling over Jimin and Seokjin.  

He’s nOT JEALOUS OR ANYTHING  

It’s just...  

It’s not like you’ve never been close to any hot guys before.  

Uh hello???  

HE’S HOT  

And you’re with him 24/7

Wait…  

Do you even think he’s hot???  

Okay now that’s a thought he never considered before.  

Damn bro  

Now Tae’s having an existential crisis…  

anD hE’s dEfiniTEly NOT jEALous!!!  

ᕙ(⇀‸↼‶)ᕗ  

"WE'RE HERE!"  

All four of you direct your heads to the sound of a new voice and you start to think that Taehyung might actually be playing a joke on you.  

Come on!  

THREE 👏  MORE 👏  HOT 👏 GUYS  👏

???  

This can't be real.  

This is literal heaven!  

Gasp!  

Are.  

You.  

DEAD?!  

Maybe you're right about Jimin being what greets you into heaven!

It all makes sense.  

“Dude, we came as soon as we could. We even pulled Namjoon out of his rabbit hole.” The handsome one wearing a sports jersey says. 

“This better be important. I didn’t even get to ask permission to take a break! I’m supposed to be stocking utensils right now.” The handsome one wearing an atrocious outfit of a bright blue shirt and a much brighter yellow pants chimes in.  

The handsome one wearing loose fitting jeans, a plaid button up and a black t-shirt underneath just stayed at the sidelines not saying anything.  

Out of all of them, you think he’s the most stylish one.  

Your eyes meet while you are assessing his outfit but he instantly looks away.  

A noticeable blush blooms on his cheeks and you almost swoon.  

Awww he’s extra cute.  

“Yeah, cause organising cutlery is more important than a friend in a literal crisis.” Taehyung says in a sarcastic tone.  

“So what are we doing here?”  

“What is this ‘crisis’ you are referring to?”  

“Yo, who is she?”  

Namjoon, Jin, and handsome jersey boy all talk at the same time.  

Ugh you need a massage.  

Being surrounded by these broke handsome men is making you lightheaded.  

“This is Y/n. You know, my other best friend.”

“Oh, your money buddy.” Handsome jersey boy butts in.   

Uh EXCUSE YOU, WHAT’S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?  

You scoff hard and loud.  

Taehyung clears his throat and you thought he was going to make a comment defending you or something.  

Oh honey, you are wrong.  

Because for the nth time today, he just brushes you off.  

“Yeah, yeah. Whatever. Anyways, Guys, meet Y/n. Y/n, this is Hoseok hyung, Namjoon hyung, and Jungkook.”  

You didn't think it'd be possible but for the first time ever, you so badly want to rip someone's hair out.  

And not just someone, it's Taehyung.  

Normally, a sassy, moody, rude boy Taehyung doesn’t affect you at all.  

But then again, his negative vibes were never really directed to you.  

And given the current circumstance, you’re also not in the best mood as well.  

So you aren't as inviting as you usually are when you shook hands with the three boys.  

Somehow, even their overflowing handsomeness did not do anything for you now.  

Your presence, however, did something to the three boys.  

AND I MEAN A LOT.  

Confused, attracted, intimidated, confused, in awe, slightly scared, nervous, confused, hungry…  

What? Hoseok hasn’t had lunch and coincidentally, he started feeling his tummy rumble when he looked at you.  

…..  

Fun fact: Hoseok is DEFINITELY NOT A CANNIBAL NOR HE EVER PLANS ON BEING ONE.  

If ever you were thinking...  

“Okay, so here’s the sitch.” Tae starts to explain your situation and everyone listens to him intently.  

Little did you all know, the final member of the friend group just arrived at the food court and is now walking towards where you all are.  

It wasn’t difficult to spot your group with Namjoon’s obnoxiously brightly coloured towering self and the few girls hanging around.  

Probably Jimin’s fanclub.  

“And so, here we are!” Tae finishes, keeping everyone updated.  

"Wow, so you two are looking for an actual job? Like, here? At the mall??" A very baffled Seokjin asks.  

Tae rolls his eyes.  

"Yes. Is that really hard to believe?"  

"Actually, yes. It is."  

Another male voice is heard coming from someplace.  

“Yoongi hyung!”  

Oh great! Another one.  

Surely, this guy’s not that interesting.  

I mean, what are the fricking odds that he’s also an immaculate being??  

You turn around and your mouth drops to the floor.  

No no no no no.  

No way!  

Another freaking gOOD LOOKING GUY HAS WALKED UP TO YOUR GROUP.  

Okay, this is getting unbelievable now.  

Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy?  

Like, where and how on earth did Taehyung manage to get and round up SIX insanely good looking guys??  

What is this? Are you on The Bachelorette??

Wait no   

It's like Oprah!  

And instead of cars, she's giving away handsome men

You get a hot Asian man, you get a hot Asian man, you all get a hot Asian man!  

OR MAYBE  

Are you on MTV Punk'd?????  

Statistically speaking, a hot guy can have two or maybe three equally hot best friends

BUT SIX???   

ARE YOU KIDDING?  

Is Taehyung like Thanos? Collecting the six infinity stones?  

Thanos? lol.  

If anything, he's more like Henry VIII with his six wives.  

“So you guys didn’t even wait for me, huh?”

Yoongi, oh so casually, just takes a seat beside you   

Without even giving you a single glance or whatnot.  

“I didn’t know you'd be here at the mall today?”  

“Yeah, what are you doing here?”  

Yoongi raises an eyebrow. “It’s a free country, I can be here whenever I want to be.”  

Well, can’t argue with that logic.  

The mall is practically your second home at this point.  

“... Also… uTunes is hiring and uh… I’m applying...”  

You don’t understand why but everyone else looks either shocked or annoyed at Yoongi’s announcement... 

Are you missing something here?  

“Man, you need to give it up! That place can suck it.”  

Yoongi gives Seokjin one of the scariest glare you’ve ever seen.  

It could rival against your dad’s famous death glares that he gives to his incompetent subordinates.  

Namjoon shakes his head disapprovingly, “You’re applying there again?? I can’t believe it.”  

Yes, again.  

This is going to be the seventh time he’s applying at uTunes Records, the most popular music shop there is.  

So many people flock to it even though we’re already in the digital age.  

But he doesn’t question it.  

All he cares about is getting a job there because the employees get to play their own music in the store.  

Do you know how much of a popularity boost that is?  

A CRAP TON.  

On top of that, one of the employees gets a chance to get signed by a record label every year.  

And if you're not awarded by that chance, you can still meet agents and get signed through their many parties.  

Because of that, so many people also apply for a job there.  

But they unfortunately have such high standards which is why even after three years, he still hasn’t passed their vibe check.

"Listen, seven's a lucky number. I have great feelings about this one. Besides, I've built up a strong résumé. Winning one of uTunes' own rookie dj contests must mean something, right? They can't not take me!"   

Wow.  

You've only known Yoongi for a solid three minutes, but you can already tell that he's quite passionate about this.  

"Hyung, all we're saying is that maybe you should consider doing something else? You could do so much more than run after that store." Jimin says and pats Yoongi's hand a couple of times.  

"All of you perfectly know getting a job there could quite possibly set my music career!"  

"Is that really it? Or is it because of a certain Daphne??" Seokjin teases him.  

The rest just mutters an "ooh" or an "aah".  

You seem to have been turned into an accessory.  

You so cannot relate to anything they've talked about since Yoongi came. 

It's like you're at one of your dad's social gatherings and all you can do is smile and nod.  

"ANYWAY," Yoongi interjects in their teasing. "So Tae, you're also looking for a job?"  

Jeez FINALLY.  

Something you can talk about that involves you.  

It felt like you were just back home watching some random show that doesn't require your input.  

Taehyung gives an overly dramatic heavy sigh.  

"Unfortunately, yes. Y/n and I both need one badly. But all the stores had been rejecting us left and right. Like, the audacity!" Taehyung rants all over again.  

Jimin, listens to him intently as if he hasn't heard all of this before.  

Seokjin seems to have been entertaining the surrounding ladies for a while now.

[by giving some ( ˘ ³˘)♥︎ and some (•̀ᴗ-)☞  ]  

Across the table, Namjoon complains to Hoseok about getting in trouble with his boss.  

Jungkook, well, he's just staring at the beautiful pizza this kid next to you guys is eating. (Someone's hungry too, okay?) 

While Yoongi just openly stares at you.  

Welp.  

What the frick are you supposed to do now?

Is Taehyung or anyone going to properly introduce you two?   

No???  

Okay fine.  

Seems like you're gonna have to get used to doing things on your own.  

You smile at him and timidly hold your hand out.  

"Uh hi. I'm Y/n. I don't know if Tae's ever mentioned me to you before but--"  

"Oh, trust me. He's mentioned you plenty. He actually never shuts up about you."  

ʰᵉʰ  

Ok  

You don't really know if he was stating that as a fact or if he's trying to be mean…  

"Oh ha ha… That must be really annoying then."  

"Yeah, it is actually."  

Your small polite chuckle died down your throat.  

Wow and you thought Taehyung can be rude.  

hE'S STILL JUST STARING.  

"Uh…" You finally lowered your hand that he obviously isn't going to shake.  

That is definitely going in your top 10 most embarrassing moments ever.  

God, can someone get you away from this guy?  

What's his problem?  

"SO, can any one of you help us? Like, any tips or something?" Tae concludes his really long and repetitive rant.  

Everyone's eyes FINALLY focuses on Tae again.  

Seokjin snorts loudly.  

Eww.  

He opens his mouth to say something but Tae immediately holds his hand up to stop him.  

"Anyone except you hyung. I don't think you're classified."  

Everyone laughs to that and again,  

ARE YOU MISSING OUT ON SOMETHING HERE?  

Seokjin raises one finger like he's trying to make a point. "If anyone is classified to give tips on how to get accepted, it's me!"  

"Yeah, just not on how to last on one." Namjoon loudly whispers to Tae.  

"HEY I HEARD THAT!"  

Ohhh….  

So,  

Does he constantly get fired from a job?  

Well, that's just sad.  

Hopefully you don't end up like him.  

😳  

"Actually," Hoseok starts, "how do you end up landing on so many jobs? Like, don't they know your reputation?"  

And that's your cue to finally insert yourself in the conversation.  

"Uh, what reputation?"  

"Sweetheart, you don't really want to know! It's not that big of a deal." Seokjin quickly steers you away from the topic but the other guys didn't allow it to happen.  

"Oh, you know. Just that, he's known to be the "job eater" here. Cause he pretty much eats a job and moves on from it in a flash." Namjoon graciously fills you in.  

So you were right.  

That's kind of impressive though…  

But a huge waste.  

"Still! It makes me very much qualified to give the unemployed a tip!"  

"Save it hyung, you might need it for your next job once you get fired from Uncle Aang's."  

Seokjin gives everyone a sheepish smile.  

What's that about?  

It almost looks as if he…  

"YOU GOT FIRED ALREADY?!"  

"Oh you bet I did."  

To be fair, how could he not stop himself from eating the free samples? Those pretzels are literal drugs.  

"You just got that job four days ago. I can't believe it!"  

"I can believe it." Yoongi says out loud.  

Can't he say anything nice?  

"Whatever! Point is, these stores still hire me no matter what."  

"You know what, that is a good point." Taehyung mutters, slowly turning convinced by Seokjin.  

Namjoon groans. "Are you for real Tae? If you want some job advice, maybe ask one from us who has only had one permanent job all throughout."  

"Guys, let's give Seokjin hyung a chance!" Jimin, ever the sweet positive boy, suggests.

"Of course you would say that."    

Not wanting to fade into nothingness, you insert yourself again in the conversation.  

"I want to hear what he has to say."  

Once those words left your mouth, you instantly regret it.  

A.) Seokjin gives you another wink and gives you a flying kiss that has you weak in the knees again- I MEAN WHAT. I SAID NOTHING.  

And B.) Yoongi is clearly not a fan of you sharing your opinions with the group.    

Despite the obvious protests of Namjoon, Seokjin still gives his number one "professional" advice  

And that is to have a perfectly 𝒉𝒊𝒈𝒉 𝒒𝒖𝒂𝒍𝒊𝒕𝒚 résumé.  

"A high quality résumé? YOU? What the fuck are you talking about?" Yoongi says, slightly amused and slightly tired of the older guy's shenanigans.  

"Don't believe me? Fine. But I'm telling you, it's all here on paper!" Seokjin takes out a folder from his backpack and waves it around.  

Namjoon immediately snatches it from him  

"5 pages long?? Are you for real?”  

Seokjin hums and watches smugly with a cocky grin as the guys read through his résumé.  

“Hang on, since when did you do balloon modelling?”  

"I don't."  

Hoseok gasps. "But bro, isn't that lying?"  

"Yeah, duh! How else are these people gonna hire you? You have to sell them what they're looking for."  

"What if they ask you to use these skills that you clearly don't have?"  

"Then you're just gonna have to fake it till you make it, baby!"  

Huh  

No wonder he doesn't last long on a single job.  

"And how's that working out for you?" Yoongi presses on.  

"Well at least I get hired, Mr. 7th Time's the Charm!"  

Yoongi is like ᶠⁱᵗᵉ ᵐᵉ ⁱ ʷᵒⁿ'ᵗ ʰᵉˢⁱᵗᵃᵗᵉ ᵇⁱᵗᶜʰ (ง'̀-'́)ง  

"That's not really the point of having a job, but I guess, whatever floats your boat, dude!" Hoseok finally sides with Seokjin.  

"So everyone is looking for a job then?" Taehyung realizes, "this is so cool if all of us get hired! We'll all face the real world together."  

"All of us except Jungkook though."  

Who?  

Oh that extra cute shy boy.  

You forgot he's here.  

Boy really hasn't said a word at all.  

"Did ya hear that? All of us are getting jobs!"

"You should get one too!"   

"That would be so cool!"  

"So what do you say? What are your plans Kook?"  

"Guys, don't pressure the kid!"  

The guys talk simultaneously, ultimately kind of pressuring Jungkook to say something before he even thinks about it.  

The table falls silent and everyone eyes Jungkook.  

The guys are like ( ･ิ ͜ʖ ･ิ) and ( ͠° ͟ʖ ͡°)  

Jungkook is like (ʘ ͟ʖ ʘ)  

Then the guys are like (≖ ͜ʖ≖)  

So jungkook is like (¬‿¬ )  

In the end, they are all like 

(☞°ヮ°)☞ ☜(°ヮ°☜)  

And through it all, you are just ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ  

What the heck is going on?  

"Yeah, why not?" Jungkook simply concludes and the guys make various celebrating noises.  

Gasp!  

He can talk???  

"Okay, everyone calm down! Let's wait until after everyone gets hired before we celebrate." Namjoon scolds everyone.  

"Well that might take a while considering Y/n and I can't find one!"  

Namjoon places a comforting hand on Tae's shoulder. "Oh relax, there's like ten thousand stores in the mall!"  

"Actually, there are only 613 stores in the entire mall." Hoseok points out a matter of factly.  

You all look at him dumbfoundedly.  

Aaaand he just stares back at all of you.  

Is this some kind of trivia that you need to know if you work around here?  

Are you gonna have to memorise a lot of facts about the mall???  

Oh, you don't like that.  

Seokjin was the first one to react.  

"Dude?? What the hell?!"  

"I got bored once while I was on a break and counted."

Huh.  

Makes sense.  

Yeah, sure.  

Why not?  

Why wouldn't you just go and count the total number of stores out of boredom???  

…  

THAT WAS A SARCASTIC REMARK IF YOU DIDN'T GET IT.  

"Even if there are 600 stores here, there are only like, 20 good stores that exist!" Tae remarks   

You want to say you can't agree more but you stop yourself because you don't think you can handle another cold stare from Yoongi.  

"Are you perhaps pertaining to the high end stores?" Namjoon muses.  

"Yeah. What else?"  

Jimin's eyes widen in shock. "Hold on. So you two have only been looking at that small section of the entire mall?"  

"Yeah. Why?"  

Yoongi chuckles condescendingly.  

"Bros, you know that saying… 'Beggars can't be choosers'?" Hoseok tries to enlighten you two.  

You and Tae look at each other.  

What an epiphany.  

A very disgusting yet important epiphany.  

"Are you… Are you guys saying that… We need to find a job… Outside of that section??"  

They all nod.  

Ughhhhhhh  

You and Tae make an annoyed sound.  

"Welcome to the real world, peasants!" Seokjin warmly tells you.  

Could things get any worse?  

"Hey, at least we'll all be here together!"  

Ha ha 

Great . Awesome. Wow.

"Well, on that note, I really need to get back to work. Lady and gentlemen, may the odds be ever in your favour. Good luck!"  

Namjoon stands and walks away.  

One by one, the other working guys went back to work as well, leaving you unemployed slackers.  

Hey they didn't even give any actual help!  

Wasn't that the reason why Tae called for a… What did they call it?  

Code something something.  

Oh whatever!  

Anyways,  

So to summarize things  

You might end up working at an awful low end store.  

And you're unwillingly stuck with the wrong set of people.  

One of them is a total flirt and an actual pain to society.  

Another one might possibly hate you for unknown reasons.   

This tall dude seems to be really uptight.  

Then there's this guy that seems really weird.

The other one, well… He's cute and doesn't really have any negative points yet BUT you're sure something's wrong with him.   

And the last one literally said one thing during the entire time!  

Oh, you've got a really really long way before you can pay your dad.  

Good luck to you, indeed.   

[captain-jinguji]

Hi! I really love your writing! Hope you're alright! Can I get a headcannon of all three? (Or which ones you want!) Groups that have a crush on a fan? Like they see them at a handshake event or an album signing fanmeet and they fall in love? What would they do?

👀 I can try lol let's get to it. Glad you enjoy the content love 💖 I kind of left all of these off on a cliffhanger 😂

STARISH + QUARTET NIGHT + HEAVENS falling in love with a fan

STARISH

Natsuki:

It was probably at a meet and greet when he saw you in your piyo-chan themed outfit and smiling brightly in front of him. Out of all his friends, him and otoya probably have the easiest time hitting it off with fans and seeing you being super into the same things that he is makes his heart tingle a bit. Most people think hes childish but you seem super supportive! Exchanges numbers with you and it soon blossoms into a nice friendships, but he can feel himself wanting more than that.

Tokiya:

He tries to stay professional every time he meets fans out and about but you were looking great that day and honestly didnt even mention that you were a fan. You were super nice and polite when he met you in the coffee shop that morning and the casual small talk turned into an actual conversation. From that day on, he always came into the coffee shop in the mornings to talk with you and at some point you guys just had each others numbers lol you did confess to him that you are a fan, but you're not crazy like some others, which is mainly why he ended up falling; you weren't super insane.

Cecil:

He just saw you in the crowd and your eyes met. It's super cliché but he swears it was love at first sight. And then he saw you backstage because you were VIP and he just KNEW he had to meet you. He was super loving and so were you and honestly you guys just hit it off. Cecil always brags that he can sense these things and he sensed that you guys were meant to be on some level, he just didn't realize it would be head over heels romantic.

Ren:

He probably met you on set because you were an intern or something and Ren being Ren, he's always super nice and flirty and you tried so hard to just brush him off but it just makes you want him more and ugh at some point you did give in and flirted back and that just set him on fire and now he just HAD to go out with you so he took you for dinner one night after production and you confessed that you were a fan and duh he gave you an autograph and asked you to please be chill about it. And then you teasingly asked him what he's gonna do if you don't and all of a sudden his lips were on yours and now hes confused on how the hell he fell for a fan.

Otoya:

He was giving guitar lessons to a group of fans once that won like a contest but you really stood out because you were such a natural and he swears youve done this before but you swear you've never even touched a guitar? Smh he had to see how far you can go so he just kept you around after the lesson and you guys soon become super good friends. Numbers were exchanged and you guys were texting day and night. It was all the silly love things; smiling at your phone, talking all day, shy little flirting... He was definitely not prepared for this.

Syo:

He was at a photo booth with fans and you and I just had the matching fedoras? Like how? What were the odds? Asked you about it and you guys actually bought it at the same store on the same day???!!! Hes freaking out but its also so cool and then you tell him you have like a whole collection and he gets super excited because he LITERALLY has a separate closet for JUST his fedoras okay? Gives you his number so you can show off all your fedoras and he finds out you guys have even more matching ones and suddenly shawty doesnt feel so weird anymore and like hes odd but he also feels... This strange attraction.

Masato:

Masato has a favorite tea shop he goes to at least once a week to buy new teas and just sit down and relax. It was really funny because you literally ran into each other and the tea just kind of fell everywhere. It was super awkward and both of you were blushing but then he noticed you guys organized the teas back in the exact same way and he just asks if it's weird that he does it alphabetically and in color and then you just added that you low-key hate the way the store does it becomes its NOT alphabetically and by color. He invited you to join him for tea and he swears hes never felt so relaxed before; hes never laughed that much before. When he found out you're a fan, he just kind of stiffened and hoped you weren't crazy, but deep down he knew that you werent and he just kept coming back to the tea shop more often now...

QUARTET NIGHT

Reiji:

You actually saved him from other fans by dragging him into a photo booth. Cue cute photos but also a group of fans running the other way! You guys laughed the incident off but you did confess that you were a fan also..he joked that you only dragged him away so you could kidnap him but he saw you freak out and promise that is wasnt like that he felt soooo bad. Told you that he was joking and things are okay and invited you to spend the rest of the day with him and you guys just kind of became really close. He honestly feels like a teenager in love right now...

Ranmaru:

Rock concert gang! You just asked him to move aside because he was blocking your view and he was about to tell you off but you actually looked so HOT okay? He can't do that. And then you noticed who HE was and you guys just kind of stared. You apologized first and wanted to move aside, but instead he dragged you back and put you in front of him. Honestly being so close to him was giving you a heart attack but you didnt show that. Afterwards, he walked you home because you guys just started talking about rock and you honestly became even more attractive to him and now he cant get you off of his mind...

Camus:

It was at a meet and greet and you ran into him and normal camus wouldve thrown you across the room but fan camus couldnt do that. So he just kind of bit his lip and told you it was okay but you insisted on making it better and bought him sweets afterwards and who is he to deny his fans wishes, right? Actually finds out you bake and of course he has to judge your baking now and demands asks you to get him some. Long story short, the baking just convinced him more ....

Ai:

He wont admit that he goes to games con but he goes to games con. He saw you in a fully functioning robot costume and he asks you all about it. How you got the idea, how you got the electronics to work, etc... Was so amazed by your intelligence but also gave you some ticks and tricks on how to better it. Honestly he asked if you wanted help on sparkling it up a bit and so you invited him over to your house. You mentioned that you were a fan and he just kind of hummed his songs with you, but now his chest is feeling warm?

HEAVENS

Eiichi:

You were one of the new interns at raging and he's had his eyes set on you for a while. Of course, he knew you were a fan so he actually gave you a private show once and was happy you enjoyed it lol but then you got to talking and his flirty demeanor changed into more of a serious one. He was actually interested in what you were saying and who you were as a person and he knew that this was the start of something...

Kira:

It was funny because he actually knew you through his family and he was kind of surprised that you were also a fan. Spoke to you and though he himself doesnt speak a lot, he did comment and eventually joined the conversation. Brought up memories you guys shared and suddenly he realized how much he actually missed those young childhood days...

Nagi:

First things first he already hates you. Just because he was nice at the meet and greet, doesnt mean he likes you. When you ran into him afterwards he actually low-key snapped at you until he realized you were a fan from earlier and he got scared he wrecked HEAVENS reputation. So he took you out for ice cream to make up for it and now hes actually laughing at your jokes and he hates himself for it...

Eiji:

You won a contest that allowed you to spend the day with him! He had everything planned out and took you out to eat and shopping, but then you dragged him off the plan and now youre watching the sunset together? Its so cliché romantic and he cant deny the feeling of needing to wrap you up in his arms, but he can't do that, can he ....?

Yamato:

You guys competed together and when he saw you in the crowd, he got super excited and it gave him even more energy. Literally hunts you down after the show and grins the biggest grin. Says he didn't know you were a fan and you just kinda said that "of course you have to support your rivals". This just made him laugh and challenge you and long story short you guys were making out from all the build up tension that you managed to make over the years and now he has eiichi scolding him...

Van:

He saw you. He liked you. He had to get you. Knew you were a fan because you were at all the concerts and always had VIP passes so to acknowledge that he took you out for a drink *wink wink* you guys somehow got into the deeper conversations of life and he really liked the way you think? So he gave you his number "just in case something happened" and walked you home, but now hes the one with butterflies and a racing heart...

Shion:

Usually his bandmates were the ones with crazy fans and the ones who get the most attention but then you wanted to meet HIM not eiichi, or van, or even nagi. So he immediately wanted to prove himself but he just loved the way you smiled and laughed at his jokes and his eyes shone so brightly at you and wow are you even real? Gets your number and much like Otoya, it's an all day every day thing now...

[shiro-0197]

Oh I'm glad you got to rest more today tho!! Are you feeling okay this morning?? HAPPY INDEPENDENCE DAY!!! Will you be doing anything special to celebrate it?

Fan-Haikyuu team? (I may just be dumb, but is that when you think of actors who fit the Haikyuu characters?😭😭😭I'm probably wrong but that sounds really cool) I'm just taking a short break from work, and I'll continue again in a while ^-^

in that case I sincerely hope you have something every morning :] (question: rice or noodles??) Oh I see!! I don't drink milk with my tea... I've never tried it because my mom always says tea is better without milk (but maybe that's just her 😝) but I love green tea the most.

aaah that's just so precious. And yeah the mbti test was pretty hard for me too, but I like my classification a lot. It sums me up perfectly, now that I think about it.

YOUR QUICHES ARE PROBABLY TO DIE FOR ISTG. Pizza's are also a good way to sneak cheese in! I made some yesterday for dinner and I'm pretty sure I used a lot more cheese than needed xD but oh well, cheese is bae 😼🤚

omg your parrot sounds ADORABLE! What's its name? And ksjdksks yes toads are very cute too :> they're like creatures mostly found in fairy tails, so I find that nice. But yes, in general, all animals are perfect and deserve love :) my club's logo is a lion, so I kinda like lions too (they're just big cats with pretty hair tbh)

You're tempting me to not do it, sir— 😼

omg noooo I'm sobbing that's fullproof istg. But yeah smh amateurs :] were the stories any interesting, or was it just school books related to the syllabus ? We don't have that here tbh we just have the literature components to our language studies, and that's the only books they make us read (but everyone buys the summary from bookshops so no one ever reads the whole book anyways)

thank you for reminding me, my precious cookie, I'll certainly keep that in mind and take more frequent rests :) I hope you do the same too, and smile often!! (I'm sure you have the prettiest smile), and of course, a wonderful day ahead.

AKDBDLSBDKSK NOOOOO SCIENCE PUNS I'M MELTING. 😝That's so cute, because you're Hydrogen; my number 1 !!

Love you love you LOVE YOU!

—Ari

Hey hey!! I'm feeling great, I've had a headache since the pillow said "fuck you" and somehow got messed up, but I took a pill and had a drink, and ow I'm better:D Thank youu!! I'm not sure I will, since my mom is going to a relative's birthday and im gonna stay at home alone, so might as well just make myself grilled cheese while watching Netflix. But, if i were at school right now, we'd definitely have a festival (or as close as we can get to a festival, considering the school's budget) or something similar to that, hehe. The school really made a huge deal out of holidays. I really miss it sometimes, cuz it never feels like a holiday at home, even during new years:/

Ohh, I meant like, creating original characters and shoving them all into the HQ universe and making it a team. Lemme show you the least of the team members xD

We're still working on the staff and the leftover characters' designs. I made school and volleyball uniform, but they dont look great so I'll probably work on them more!!! Me, Kuro & Liza (the friend) are making it, with Kuro being the main artist and Liza creating the characters. I'm responsible for the stuff. It's pretty fun. Hahah, sorry for rambling like that, it's like a personal passion project, and it's the only productive thing I can do while having fun, so I'm very happy about it~

I really love noodles♡ anything related to noodles is my favorite. If only you'd see me freaking out when I see spaghetti on our school menu XD I wish we got to make noodle soup more often. I love it so much😭

I only prefer rice when it's really spicy. I love spicy stuff a lot, and plain rice/rice soup feels really weird and my picky ass doesnt like it. I also love Pilaf (we call it plov here), it's not always spicy but it still tastes good😝

Oh, I think you should try it! It's really good, kind of plain but still nice. I'm really picky about my tea and I havent drunk any good tea in ages, but I remember a really nice cafe that served PERFECT green tea. I miss it😩 It was when I went on a school event, we got to roam around the city (with the teachers of course, because most have no idea where they are haha), and I visited that cafe, and I absolutely loved everything about it.

OH YEAH, but pizzas are really thin and get eaten fast, while quiches and pies are more fulfilling XD that's just me probs but still~

Ahhh, my parrot's name was Molly! Though only after her death I realised that it was indeed a "he", which was awkward. But the shopkeeper said it's a girl, and we were uneducated, so it's not our fault XD it was the cutest, tbh. It loved running after my pens when we played on the table. Sadly, my disgrace of a father kept reopening the front door in winter and overfeeding it when I wasn't home, so the parrot passed away:( one more reason to hate the old man, haha~ dont worry, I'm over it :D

Omg!! Lions, lions are so wonderful🥺🥺 Our school logo is a bird,

Hopefully it's visible. The pic is transparent, sorry for that XD

The stories weren't the best. There were children's turkish books, a few kazakh classics, a Harry Potter book (I hadnt gotten a chance to read or watch them, but after the Rowling situation I kind of lost any wish to somehow associate with the books) and honestly the Russian ones were the only readable ones:D (also, what little cheaters they are XD tbh our guys probably would do the same)

I'll try my best to smile whenever I can~ itll be easy if i just keep you in mind, shortcake;D

Ohhh that one is adorable!! I love you muchh😭🥺💕💕

[cncoh-damn]

Late Night Calls

Summary: As much as you love talking to the guys, late night calls with them isn’t always the best thing, especially when timezones are in the way.

Word count: 4,993

Tags: @richukisbb @quierick @mamacamacho @erickspretend1 @whymyeyeslikethat @zaddydejesus @zabdielsdimples @cncownerxcr7 @streamdecero @cncoxpmxvibes @marveloucnco

Wanna join the taglist? 

Ah, tests. No matter how good you were at school, there would never come a time when you’d look back on them with a smile. Of course, with this being the last year you’d have to take them (at least, until you decide to go to college), you just can’t afford to flunk a single one. Despite several protests from both your own squad and the boys, you promptly locked yourself in your room with nothing but several cans of Red Bull and one too many snacks that definitely didn’t count as dinner. Of course, you couldn’t really ignore the repeated knocking on your door (courtesy of Elodie, the twins, and Alex) nor could you ignore the buzzing of your phone, no doubt caused by the guys trying to convince you to take a break and actually eat something that didn’t come from a vending machine, so with a sigh, you get off your bed and unlock the door.

Unbeknownst to you, Alex stopped banging on the door roughly half an hour ago, and she’d been put on update duty; sending pictures and telling Zabdiel–who would then tell the others–how things were going on their end. Zabdiel did the same, although he still sent you messages every half hour or so. By the end of your five-hour study session, you swear there would be little grooves on your door from where one of the girls’ bracelets or rings hit. Checking your phone for the notifications, you’re mildly impressed to see the number of messages and missed calls you got, most of them from Erick and Chris. Probably something about your unhealthy habits, but really, you’re not about to listen to them; those two were sometimes worse than you after all.

And that’s how, ninety minutes later, you went back to your room after a somewhat excruciating–but delicious–dinner. As she came from a family that put a premium on academic achievement, Alex was the most sympathetic to your wanting to spend the rest of the night studying, though she was quick to tell you to not “study until you pass out” again. Slipping on a stolen hoodie (probably Christopher’s judging by how it wasn’t too baggy on you), you put on your studying playlist and get lost in your textbooks, a feat more difficult than it would seem.

The hours pass in a blur of flash cards, ink smudges, notes scrawled messily in the margins of a page, and several breaks for you to pop the knuckles of your hand when it feels like it’s about to cramp up from writing so much. By the time you finish, it’s already nearing eleven in the evening, and judging by the lack of noise from beyond your door, the others were already asleep or out. (E/c) eyes glance over the mess on your desk, papers and books and pens strewn around your laptop. You then glance over to the vanity-turned-extra-desk-space in front of your bed, brows furrowing at the mess. Not really the most ideal set-up, especially when everything you needed had to be within arm’s reach, but you could fix it later on. Or once your tests are over, something that seems more likely than the former.

Stretching your limbs, you let out a yawn before your eyes fall upon your phone, a notification light blinking to alert you of, well, unseen notifications. Placing your thumb over the home button for it to acknowledge your fingerprint, you rub your eyes with the other hand as your phone unlocks to show everything you’ve missed.

Thirty missed WhatsApp calls from the guys.

Several puns from Erick telling you to stay hydrated and take care of yourself.

Memes from both Chris and Erick that are related to the subjects you currently had.

Khan Academy videos from Zabdiel and Joel.

And finally, a group selfie from Richard, with all of them looking like kicked puppies. You have no idea who came up with the caption, but you were sure the dorks were trying to guilt you into studying and looking after your health. As much as you wanted to deny it, the fact that they all cared enough to spam your phone with messages telling you to take care of yourself warmed your heart. Needless to say, that picture gets saved to your gallery, where you’ll keep it to look at every time you needed a reminder to look after yourself it’ll stagnate and probably end up buried under the copious amount of memes and videos you save from your chats with the guys.

Noticing that your phone’s about to die–you both love and hate them for spamming it, because that meant your battery got drained quicker than it normally did–, you snag one of the many phone chargers on your bedside table, plugging it into the socket behind your table lamp and leaving it there. Next, you stretch some more before you pad over to your bathroom, fully intent on taking a shower before falling asleep. Hey, you might even get the chance to try out that new body wash you and Joel got from Lush the last time you hung out with him.

You step out of the bathroom twenty minutes later, shea butter-scented steam wafting into your room. Mental note to self, (Y/N): thank Joelito next time you see him, because shea butter smells so good. Plus it felt great on your skin, a bonus that usually came with the skincare products you bought. Yes, where most people bought skincare stuff for the sake of making their skin better, you buy the stuff because it smells good. After you wring out the excess water with a towel, you plonk down on the stool in front of the bathroom counter, a hairbrush in one hand and the hair dryer in another. Five minutes is all it takes for your hair to be just a little damp, and you set the dryer down to brush your hair until it’s no longer wet. Once that’s done, you brush your teeth and rush through the five step skin regime that Iana and Joel set up for you. Yeesh.

By the time your head hits the pillow, you don’t bother with anything aside from getting the blanket over your head as sleep claims you. Too bad you’re not getting the uninterrupted eight hours of sleep you wanted.

CYOA: Pick Your Boy

Christopher Velez:

maybe it wasn’t a good idea for you to set one of the most iconic songs in your music library as his ringtone

but really, Sk8r Boi was the song for him

YES IT’S BC HE’S AN ACTUAL SKATER

plus it was the first song you two ever jammed out to, so it’s got a special spot in your friendship

ANYWAY

as much as you love Avril Lavigne, you weren’t fond of waking up to the guitar riff you always played when you got your hands on an electric guitar

honestly you were tempted to let it go to voicemail because DAMN IT BRYANT, YOU WERE SLEEPY

but you figured that Chris wouldn’t call you at fuck knows what time in the morning if there wasn’t a reason

so you pick up, pulling the micro-USB connector from your phone’s charging port before pressing it into your ear, half your face smooshed into your pillow

“Nena!”

now normally the hyper ball known as Christopher Velez wouldn’t annoy you by simply saying one word, but… you were tired

so you grunt before speaking. 

“Hola, Chris.”

bear in mind you were rudely awakened by his ringtone playing, so you’re not in the best mood rn

but he deadass doesn’t pick up on it

so he’s babbling on and on, switching between Spanish and English way too quickly for your still-sleepy mind to comprehend

just as you’re about to yawn, he stops mid-sentence

“(Y/N)? Cuál es tu color favorito?”

you actually yawn while he’s asking, and it takes a second or so for you to realize he asked for your favorite color

“Uhh (f/c),” you say, yawning right after.

he doesn’t say much to you after, and you’re about to let the background noise from his end lull you to sleep

HA SIKE

just as you close your eyes, he makes this triumphant little noise that wakes you up again

and really, you don’t want to rain on his parade (even if he’s keeping you from your precious sleep), so you pull the phone away to let a tiny groan out

(Y/N) wants sleep

pero Christopher, el loco, just had to call you. smh

once you press the phone back to your ear, you barely just get the tail end of what he was saying

and really, you missed the guys (and Chris’ crazy laugh, but shh), but you needed sleep

so you yawn again before interrupting him

“Dude, I miss you and all, pero estoy cansado, chico.”

on one hand, he feels bad. but on the other, your sleepy voice is hella cute so… he has no regrets.

maybe a little guilt bc he knows you needed sleep to help with your test

so he’s all like “Ah, lo siento conejito. Go back to sleep, si? Just call me after your test!”

too bad you fell asleep in the middle of his apology lmao

he was waiting for a verbal response, but then he heard a snore

headass wanted to record it for blackmail purposes but nah

so he just hung up

gracias mucho, Christopher

(Y/N)’s circadian rhythm salutes you

also you called him as soon as school let out so you could tell him you did decent on the test

when you got it back, you sent him a picture. perfect score, hell yes.

lowkey you had to beg him not to post it on his IG. it’d be awkward af, plus it’d fuel some rumors that really wouldn’t be good for anyone

Richard Camacho:

okay, so you really had to set a punk rock song for this somewhat emo lil bish’s ringtone

but rn, you’re regretting it

no, Ronnie Radke, (Y/N) (L/N) doesn’t know why good girls go for bad guys now please shut it

it really suited Richuki tbh, what with him definitely pulling off the bad boy daddy dom look, but goddamnit it was loud

also Good Girls Bad Guys was the first Falling In Reverse song he ever listened to (courtesy of your emo phase that didn’t quite end, just turned lowkey) and he liked it

2012 (Y/N) is thrilled that 2018 (Y/N) has a friend who’s willing to listen to punk rock with her, even if said friend is a bit of a flirt

so he calls you around 4 am your time

you’re still a lil grumpy, but since you were in NREM 1, you woke up pretty easily

doesn’t mean you’re happy about it though

adios eight hours of uninterrupted sleep

but you figure this would happen sooner or later, especially since you and the guys have this sibling-like dynamic now

you pick up ofc, bc you’re already awake and you really don’t like sending any of your friends to voicemail

and he’s just surprised you picked up

there’s a little tremor in his voice and it makes you worry because you’ve never known his voice to not be even because of anything other than anger

or so you thought

now that he sounds upset, you’re a little more awake than before

“Que pasa?”

you usually switch between Spanish and English when talking to them, and it stays that way no matter how sleepy you are

there’s silence on his end for a while, and while it does make you worry more, it makes you a lot sleepier

you swear you’re about to fall asleep before he speaks up again

“No es nada. Just go back to sleep, okay?”

as tempted as you are to do just that, you’re not about to. bitchass had the guts to call you before dawn and make you worry before saying it was nothing? nuh-uh

you love sleep, but you love your friends (and your hobbies) more

“Don’t give me that bullshit Camacho.”

using his last name? he screwed up, and Richard knows it

he’s kinda quiet on the other end though, and you! don’t! like! it!

“Yashel? Richuki? C'mon man, what’s wrong?”

blame it on the fact that it’s like 4 am, that’s the only reason you’re being a softie rn

“It’s nothing. Sorry for waking you.” And then headass fucking hangs up

much to your chagrin

THE AUDACITY

he calls you before the asscrack of dawn, makes you worry, then decides that it’s nothing before hanging up on you? R U D E 

like, screw the fact that you only had four or so hours of sleep, something was up with Richard and you’re determined to find out what

so, against your better judgement, you call him

he picks up bc headass didn’t set a different ringtone for you even if you’re friends hmph

“What happened?” literally no hesitation or beating around the bush here; if something was wrong, then you sure as hell wanted to know about it, especially since he called you

“It’s nothing (Y/N). You have a test tomorrow, just go sleep.” and then he hangs up on you AGAIN

by this point you’re cranky and mildly insulted, so you plug your phone back in to charge before you go back to sleep

you didn’t wake up in the best mood that day, ngl

lil bit snappy, kinda sassier than usual

basically your mood was like Joel’s every time he was on Twitter

the bad mood followed you all the way through your test, and it was pretty obvious from how tightly you were holding onto your pen

after school, though, you call him again and hope he doesn’t hang up on you

“Wanna tell me what’s wrong now?”

“Am I a good dad?”

oof this was not something you were prepared for

“The hell are you talking about? You’re a better dad than most are, man.”

as it turns out, he misses Aaliyah and worries that he’s not doing the best he can as a father

and you’re like “???” because the fact that he and Yocelyn are co-parenting means that he’s doing his best

especially given that he’s away on tours and doing promo stuff a lot

and he’s slowly spiraling into this really dark space and you! refuse! to! let! it! happen!

“Dude, listen to me. Yes you’re not around as much as you want to, and yes you may miss some parts of her life, but look at it this way: you’re making an effort to be part of her life, and that’s way more than I can say for most of the guys who accidentally knock up their girlfriend. So chill, okay?”

soft hours have been extended all bc Richuki doubted himself :((

by the end of the call, he’s feeling a lot better

“Gracias, nena.”

“De nada, dude. Next time though? Don’t call me sounding all upset and shit and then hang up.”

he laughed at that, but then apologized, so you’re not annoyed at him anymore

lowkey you’re considering changing his ringtone but… nah

Zabdiel de Jesus

if there was anyone of the guys you thought would know not to call you when you’re supposed to be asleep, it’d be Zabdiel

but nOPE

he called you probably thirty minutes after you fell asleep

and even if Britney Spears is a guilty pleasure, you don’t want to wake up to Womanizer blaring from your phone

sorry Elodie

but it’s blaring and you’re rudely awakened and now you’re sleepily squinting/glaring at the stupid thing as if it would make it stop. it doesn’t.

so now you’re picking it up because damn it, what the fuck could Zabdiel want?

you yawn as you accept the call, laying on your side so you don’t have to hold the phone to your ear

“Que?”

you didn’t expect to hear loud ass bass and what was probably a party on the other end

but you did

and now you’re trying to keep yourself from cussing at him. you two weren’t that close yet, and no way were you going to risk offending someone because they called you at lord knows what time in the morning.

so you take a page out of his book and take several breaths to calm yourself before repeating the question

“Cometí un error,” he groans, and you’re so tempted to just yeet your phone away because fucking hell, he’s drunk! or somewhat intoxicated.

either way, you are not in the right state of mind to speak to a drunk person

“¿Qué hiciste?“ It’s a struggle to not let the annoyance in your voice show, but you barely even manage to hide it. Thankfully, he’s too drunk to notice.

“I screwed up, (Y/N).” The way he says it is almost too pathetic and you sigh.

“Si, you said that. What happened?” There’s mumbling on his end and all you could make out is a name: Gwen. it takes a while before you piece it together, and you facepalm once the puzzle pieces slot together.

he was upset about his ex

his ex that, according to rumors, he cheated on

and then, for some reason, he figured you were the best person to talk to? okay, not the best person, but one of the first people he should call. 

you were not equipped for this. nuh-uh.

“Zabdi, that was a whole year ago. Hell, maybe even more.” Really, you wanted to ask why the fuck he was thinking about this now

it’s been a Y E A R

“I really liked her,” he continues slurring into the phone, and you muffle a groan with your hand. did befriending an entire boyband mean that you had to listen to them talk about their exes even if it’s been a year? even if they were probably the cause behind the breakup in the first place?

can you resign from being their friend now? (you say this despite knowing you wouldn’t go through with it. you love the dorks too much)

“Zab, you can’t do anything about it now.” You’re trying to be a nice and comforting voice of reason, you really are, but damn it the bass is too loud and you still have a test later in the day

you don’t know what’s happening on his end, but you think you hear something that sounds suspiciously like a sob

cue another eye roll

“Escúchame, Zabdiel. It’s in the past, si? Nothing you can do about it other than learn from your mistake and no lo hagas de nuevo. Lo tengo?”

there’s a bit of scuffling on the other end, and your brows furrow. the hell was happening?

you get an answer when Clara’s voice comes through, and you blink. huh, guess they were bringing him back to the hotel. or his room, who knows.

“Lo siento (Y/N), the rest of the guys thought he went off with a girl,” she explains, and you muffle a yawn.

“It’s okay, Clara. Just–”yawn, “Make sure he doesn’t puke or something. G’night.”

you hang up before she does, plugging your phone back in before you finally conk out again

during dinner that evening, you ask the girls how to deal with a friend who’s an emotional drunk, just so you’re prepared for the next time he calls you when intoxicated.

after that, you send him a few feel-good texts. mostly stuff that siblings would send each other, so you’re really living up to the familial nature your friendship has begun to take on

Joel Pimentel:

just so we’re clear, the only reason you call Joel more than any of the other guys is because he rarely checks his messages, groupchats or otherwise

that said, you’re surprised when, instead of the first of your alarms, The A Team plays from your phone

it’s weird that he’s the one calling you and not the other way around, but you shrug it off

at least he’s calling around the time of your first alarm

“What,” you deadpan into the phone

“When the fuck were you going to tell me you were at the Infinity War premiere.”

whatever it is you were expecting to hear, this ain’t it folks

“Uhh… never?”

and cue a cranky Joelito ranting about you getting to be there and not telling him so he could’ve tried to get tickets 

to which you needed to cut him off

“Bitch, my parents got tickets. Besides, my godfather invited us.”

“Who’s your godfather?”

and cue the silence

“I’m not allowed to say.”

“W H O .”

it goes from this to you deflecting the topic until you decide to bring up your test.

he knows you’re trying to change the topic, but he’s going along with it. he’s been there before.

you start spewing out random facts, both to keep his mind from going back to anything Marvel-related and so you can see how much you remembered from last night’s study session

for the most part, it works.

Joel’s listening to you talk about facts, and every now and then he’d interject with a question, to which you quickly launch into an explanation that spawns even more questions from him

and so you two talk through the next two alarms you set, with you explaining concepts that would probably (hopefully please please please) show up on the test later

“You think I’m going to pass?”

“Hey, if I understood that because you managed to explain it to me, I’m pretty sure you have nothing to worry about.”

“Yeah, unless it doesn’t show up on the test.”

“… Don’t jinx yourself.”

you two hang up around the same time, and you’re in a considerably good mood considering he called you to ask how you managed to be at the Infinity War premiere

also it’s shocking how you two didn’t sass each other much during it

come to think of it, what time was it there when he called?

meh, you’ll figure out later. right now, you have to get ready for school, and that uniform tie isn’t going to tie itself.

#privateschoollife

ANYWAY, you get to school and shit, breeze through most of your classes until last period

DUN DUN DUN

test time

you’re shaking with nerves bc the teacher for this one is notorious for giving college-level tests to his AP classes

and even if he’s been your teacher for the past three years, you’re still terrified of failing any of his tests

but one look at the questions had you breathing a sigh of relief.

those were the things you explained to Joelito! you were going to pass!

ngl, you nyoom through the multiple choice questions and double check your math for the ones that need calculations

once school lets out for the day, you find a nice, secluded area near the botanical garden (again, private school feels) so you could call Joel and tell him you’ve got a good chance of passing the test

but when he picks up he sounds groggy af

oh, how the tables have turned

but you’re sympathetic bc he needs to look pretty; his face is one of his main selling points after all

“Hi, sorry I woke you, but I think I’m definitely gonna pass. Thanks for a while ago, bye, love you dude! Get some more sleep!”

how you managed to say that in one breath, no one has any idea.

meanwhile Joel’s just staring at his phone in confusion before realizing you thanked him for helping you recall what you studied

you two didn’t acknowledge the “love you” that got dropped in that quick, minute-long call and you never will

later that night, he calls you again because he saw another picture of you at a Marvel premiere

and this time, you two sass each other until you fall asleep

sass buddies til the end of the line

unlike Steve and Bucky BC THE END OF THE LINE WAS APPARENTLY A CHANCE TO TIME TRAVEL

anyway

it’s back to your regular, sassy program with (Y/N) and Joel. except for when tests come along, especially midterms and finals.

you two have late night calls just for him to help you study

Erick Brian Colon:

after a bit of shifting around in your bed so you can comfortably nestle in your blankets, you finally drift off to sleep, dreaming of getting an Academy Award in the future

as you were about to accept said award, the dream gets shattered when the fucking Guachineo begins to play

along with the shattering of that dream (because damn it, it’s been a near constant goal since you were a kid) comes a rude awakening not even thirty minutes after you fell asleep

as much as you loved Erick (PLATONICALLY), you were going to throttle him, pretty eyes or not

at least, that was the plan until you hear his voice

who knew someone could sound so shaken up over the phone?

okay that was rude and insensitive af but you weren’t expecting this

he literally sounded like he was about to cry, and damn it, this was the baby! this was little bebito Erick on the phone sounding like he’s about to cry and you’re not going to hang up on him.

to be fair, you wouldn’t hang up on any of your friends, but least of all Erick.

so in the sleepy voice you swore never to let anyone but the rest of your squad hear, you yawn out a “Que pasa?”

he’s practically sniffling, and even if he doesn’t quite want you to hear him cry, you’re one of the first people he thought to call, especially since the guys were out at the club 

“Extraño a mi familia,” he admits, voice shaking and you just want to wrap the guy in a blanket and cuddle him.

sure you don’t really get homesick much since you don’t live far from your parents, but it’s a wholly different thing for Erick

for one thing, he has a tight bond with his family. for another, he was what, 14 or 15 when CNCO was formed. it was probably the first time he was away from them for a long period of time, and sometimes, it didn’t get easier to bear with the passage of time

“No llora, bebito.” You’re trying to comfort him and all but you’re not exactly the best person to go to when you need emotional support. Hell, you can barely support yourself emotionally.

which brings you to the question: why me

and why when you had a quiz the next day

but this was Erick. not only was he your fellow group baby, but he was little bebito as well

you’re not about to let him be upset like this, not when you could do something about it

one problem though: you have no idea what to do about it. nice.

thankfully, he keeps talking.

as it turns out, it’s not just homesickness he’s dealing with

it’s also the pressure he puts on himself to be as good as the rest of the guys are

to be as charming as Chris, as good of a dancer as Richard, as intellectual as Joel and Zabdiel

and suddenly, you get where he’s coming from. mostly

it’s like an inferiority complex, but also, not really

as the youngest, you two had the most to prove

you two had the most expectations ahead of you

so it’s natural that you’ll end up pressuring yourselves to meet and exceed those expectations

now you know what to do, BUT you don’t know what to say

“It’s okay to feel like that, bebito,” you start, sitting up and pulling your knees to your chest. “Pero you need to remember that you don’t have to be like them. Dejaste de competir con otros when you guys won La Banda. Now, the only competition you need to worry about is yourself, si?”

you really want to baby him, especially with how soft and watery his voice sounds over the phone, but you know he’s not going to like it

as the youngest, you two end up being babied by those who know you as a member of your respective groups

and it gets annoying after some time because you just want to be treated like an adult

so you’re not going to baby him completely

you kind of stick to a soft voice the whole time you two talk

and when you feel a yawn coming on, you muffle it with your hand bc you don’t want him to feel bad

it takes a while before you ask how he’s feeling

but when he says that he’s feeling better, you immediately feel relieved

not just bc this meant you’ll be able to sleep soon, but bc it meant he wasn’t as upset anymore

a crying and upset friend always made your heart sad, but a crying and upset Erick? you were half-tempted to book a flight to wherever they were and give him a hug, exam be damned

“Gracias mucho, nena.”

“You promise you’re okay now?”

“Si. Good night, (Y/N).”

Yawn. “Good night, bebito.”

so you go back to sleep, then wake up when your alarms go off

the school day passes by in a blur, but you’re hurrying to go home bc you wanted to check in on him via FaceTime

so you do, but he doesn’t pick up

instead you just leave him a message in his voicemail

hopefully he listens to it bc as his fellow group baby, he needed to know that you were gonna be there for him when he can’t share stuff with the other guys

literally though, he’s the only one to always bring out your soft side.

but at least you love the dork.

[klanced]

soooooo i was late on asking for the second movie but i call dibs for whenever ur organized enough to infodump it: What Happens In The /Third/ Movie Katie Klanced?

I meant to post this last year but then I got suspended and forgot smh -_-

Anyway it’s been almost a year, so here are a few links to refresh your memory on the masterpiece that is my Despicable Me au. In fact, here’s the tag because I love this au.

In my correct opinion, the third DM movie is definitely the weakest in the franchise, and I pretty much ignored its canon plot and wrote my own. So sorry if there’s a few loose-ends/plot-holes. But this is a Despicable Me au, I am beholden to no gods, no rules.

Roughly a year has passed since the events of the second movie. Coran and Alfor have finally gotten together (they’re either dating or married, I haven’t decided yet). Allura is away at college because I have way too many characters on my hands and I have to sideline out of necessity. Sorry, Allura.

The movie opens up with the entire family getting ready for an award ceremony at the AVL happening that night. It’s about as hectic a scene as you can imagine. Lance is running around without a shirt on. Pidge is wearing three shirts. One is her pajama top, the second is Lance’s aforementioned missing shirt. No one has any idea where the third shirt came from.

When suddenly, the phone rings!

Krolia picks it up, paying only 1/3 attention to the person on the line before she yells that it’s for Coran. Coran limps over, half a chewed shoe in his hand, the other half still on his foot. His right eyebrow is smoking. He is, understandably, a little terse when he shouts to be heard over the background din into the phone.

The screen diagonally bisects, to show Coran on the phone and… Shiro on the other side of the line!

Shiro introduces himself as the new CPS worker assigned to Lance/Hunk/Pidge’s case. Coran immediately has a heart attack and runs to his soundproofed study, slamming the door behind him as Shiro continues to just. Awkwardly talk on the phone lol.

Coran, internally: oh shit oh shit oh FUCK oh shit why now why nowwww oh lord is he calling to take away the kids? is he going to take away my BABIES??

Shiro: sorry for the late phone call sir, i meant to call earlier but i dropped my phone in a puddle and- i mean! the life of a cps worker is just packed hahahahahahahahahaah (WHY are you still laughing you IDIOT) ha-ahem! anyway. i’m the new cps worker, have i mentioned that yet? because i am. it’s just that, after we realized that the kids’ last foster home and agent let a supervillain just walk out with them - uh, no offense, sir! i just meant that, well, supervillains are generally understood to be bad- not to imply that you’re evil of course! Haha of Course Not, even though you were Literally voted the world’s most evil and accomplished supervillain several years in a row, but! That’s neither here nor there. Of course. :)

DM!Verse Shiro is a bit of a nervous doof but he also has a spine of steel when it comes to kids and making sure their living situations are safe. And he is very skeptical of Coran and his parenting skills, which is honestly pretty reasonable considering he’s an outsider looking in. 

I mean, someone who was arguably the world’s greatest villain suddenly deciding to move to suburbia with his three (stolen) adopted kids does… seem like a bit of a stretch. And pretty sus lmfao.

Coran and Shiro eventually stutter their way into a productive conversation and arrange for Shiro to conduct a home visit/other CPS survey stuff very soon. Coran politely bids Shiro farewell, hangs up the phone, and has a panic attack because suddenly it feels like all his worse fears are coming true. Because the other shoe has finally dropped.

Life has been so kind to Coran lately, between his loving marriage and his lovable kids. It’s sad to say, but he’d half-expected something like this to happen for a while. Because people like him don’t deserve this kind of uninterrupted happiness.

Alfor quietly knocks on the door and takes in the scene before him. Coran reaches out, and he immediately rolls to his husband’s side.

Coran collapses against him and catches him up to speed. There’s a pause as Alfor pauses, absorbs, and digest the information, before he starts making calming shushing noises.

Insert Supportive Spouse Speech. Alfor reminds Coran that, for all he’s done in the past, he has damn well earned his present life. Alfor can attest to that, as can Krolia and, most importantly, their children. 

It also doesn’t hurt that the internationally recognized Anti-Villain League is both a sponsor of and willing to provide a character reference for Coran. That counts for something, and Coran finally calms down.

This is what we in the writing business like to call “foreshadowing” :)

Scene cut to the AVL award ceremony. Krolia and Coran are both being recognized for their incredible heroics from the past year, etc etc, blah blah blah. Their speeches are very true to their character.

At the end of it, Kolivan goes up and stage and announces he’s retiring. Krolia, who knew this was happening in advance and fully expects to be named as his replacement, starts checking her lipstick in her hand mirror- only for Kolivan to introduce a ‘Commander Hira’ to the crowds.

FML, this is exactly the plot to the Spongebob Squarepants movie.

The entire Wimbleton Smythe-Altea Family freeze, mid-applause. Hunk awkwardly puts away his ‘CONGRATULATIONS KROLIA!!!!!!!!’ banner. Krolia shatters her hand mirror in her fist.

Within her first month, Hira makes some dramatic changes to the AVL. One of which is the agency’s complete separation from anything having to do with villains, including its rehabilitation program.

“Once a villain always a villain” essentially. Hira insists that villains are simply too evil to ever truly become good again, and that so-called “former” criminals are simply biding their time until they can enact their revenge.

As a result, Coran is fired. Alfor protests Hira’s decision, and resigns out of solidarity. Krolia calls Hira a bitch and is also fired.

The kids are ecstatic that their dads + aunt are home 24/7 now. Krolia is less pleased. She’s been an active agent for more than half her life, so this sudden and forced turn for domesticity has her clawing at the walls.

One of the sub-plots is Alfor trying to convince Coran to become a superhero, “just like the old times.” (Coran: Love, I was literally your supervillain arch-nemesis).

Coran is hesitant, because 1) He still has low self-value and doesn’t see himself as a hero, and 2) He’s perfectly content to mooch off his billionaire boyfriend and spend his time as a stay-at-home dad.

To take their mind off their sudden unemployedness, Coran and Alfor throw themselves into preparing for Shiro’s house visit. This mainly entails Alfor calming Coran down from an anxiety attack every other hour. 

There is a lot of tension in the house.

And then, like magic! An invitation to the biggest supervillain symposium of the year appears, because villain mailing lists are especially evil and refuse to take Coran off their register even though he literally arrests villains for a living.

“So you’re telling me,” Krolia says, and Coran instinctively inches for the door. “That you’ve had an opening into the world’s biggest villain convention, this entire time, and you didn’t tell anyone?”

“W-e-ll,” Coran stutters, slapping blindly behind him for the doorknob, “It just didn’t seem very fair, you know? To ambush them like that, all because of their lazy office workers. That’s not very good sport.”

Krolia and Alfor try to convince Coran that he should go. Krolia is convinced this is the in they need to reclaim their jobs; they’ll infiltrate the Supervillain Symposium, arrest all the biggest bads, call the AVL, rub it in Hira’s face, take a selfie while she’s sobbing in the background, celebrate as the masses drag Hira to the guillotine-

Coran: Krolia I love you, I really do. But you have issues.

Krolia: I happen to be perfectly adjusted for someone in my situation.

Coran is still hmming and hawwing because, now that he doesn’t have to fight villains for a living, he quite likes Not Being In Constant Danger. But then Krolia reminds him that he is both unemployed AND now blacklisted by the AVL, two things which might very well doom him in the eyes of Shiro (and the rest of CPS). He needs to do this if he wants his job back and, therefore, keep his kids.

(…. At some point, Coran shaves off his mustache in a stress-filled attempt at appearing as a better guardian, but no one recognizes him so he has to wear a fake mustache for the rest of the movie)

Coran of course is immediately super gung-ho for this plan and declares they’re leaving ASAP.

The kids of course are raring to go, the adults are vehemently hell no to that idea, and in the ensuing argument everyone forgets that Shiro is coming today. 

A series of events thus follows, which can be summarized as:

The adults say that the kids can’t come.

The kids decide that yes, in fact, kids can come and plan accordingly.

The kids are preparing to tail after the adults (after waiting a reasonable amount of time of course (this isn’t their first rodeo) in their own modified plane when they hear what sounds like their babysitter, the Reformed Lotor, coming around the corner.

The kids immediately go into attack mode only to realize, after the dust has settled, that they’ve actually knocked out Shiro.

In their infinite pre-teen wisdom, the kids decide to stick with the plan and load Shiro into their equivalent trunk and take off.

A few moments later, Lotor finally arrives, looks up from his phone, realizes there are no kids to be watched, and shrugs and goes home.

The scene cuts to Shiro groggily stumbling out of the corner the kids have stashed the plane in, only to realize, to his absolute horror, that he’s on an island filled with Supervillains attending a Supervillain Convention.

Hunk: Man… I feel like we forgot something.

*Shiro screaming in the distance*

For brevity’s sake I’ll cut off here, but just know that this is only the FIRST THIRD (IF EVEN THAT) of the movie. I am absolutely off the CHAINS. I still haven’t even introduced Keith yet. I love this au.

[cntcrtainmcnt-blog]

Okay I got a bunch of new characters(someone stop me please!!!) so here are their intros! I would love to plot for them so please like that post or just come screaming at me!

BRYAN ACKERMAN looks an awful lot like CHRIS WOOD. HE is TWENTY-SEVEN and while they're SWEET, they have a tendency to get pretty GOOFY. You’ve probably seen them around Kola listening to I MISS YOU by BLINK 182. 

SUICIDE TW

Only child, born in Kola, at a young age he was already a big fan of football. Like that’s all he ever wanted. Nothing else mattered except that, although he did have a teeny tiny small geeky side. He just dedicated his life to the sport.

Younger, he used to be a nice kid, never said or done anything wrong, but then when he started high school, he realized all the cool kids were a bit meaner? And since he was a football player, it was kinda expected from him to stay popular or the guys on the team would start kinda hating him? So her started changing himself to fit in.

In sophomore year, he started dating another of the popular girls. It lasted until middle of senior year, and during all those years, her life just became worse and worse, but since he was so focused on sports, he never realized it. She wasn’t happy, and even with how much he loved her, it didn’t help save her. She committed suicide on the night of February 21.

That, obviously, destroyed him. He started losing focus, his grades dropped, and he was getting threatened he wouldn’t get a football scholarship. So just for that, he pulled through. But he was sad, and he just wished he’d paid more attention to the signs, but he was too self-centred for that. So he dropped the façade. He tried to just... become the nice kid he used to be again. People thought it was just his way of dealing with and he’d go back to “normal” sooner or later. But they never knew what really became of him because after graduating, he got his scholarship in Houston and left right away.

HE HATED HIS MAJOR(social sciences) but except football, nothing interested him? So he just continued because he had to be studying to be on the team.

But in his third year, he got an injury that left him in a hospital bed for a few weeks. When he came back, it just looked like he lost some of his skills. They were giving him less play time, and he was more often on the bench than anything. So after his third year, he just left. It was heartbreaking, but he couldn’t stand being sat on the bench all game, he’d rather just not be on a team at all.

So then started his long struggle to find a job. Since he never graduated college, he didn’t have a degree, so he couldn’t be hired in that field. So he just took on some small jobs, moved from city to city because maybe if he travelled a bit he’d find something he liked? But really, he didn’t, and he just ended up back in Kola. 

He got a job, waiting in a small dinner, about a year and a half ago. But now he does both waiting jobs, but some nights he’s also a singer on stage.

CATHERINE WOLFE looks an awful lot like LEIGHTON MEESTER. SHE is THIRTY-ONE and while they're METICULOUS, they have a tendency to get pretty DESPERATE. You’ve probably seen them around Kola listening to I’M A MESS by BEBE REXHA.

Older of two girls, Catherine was always competitive with her sister, even if they were 4 years apart. She wanted to be the heiress of their dad’s company, she believed it was a right for her since she was older.

But she was always in competition with other girls at school. She wanted the best grades, the best clothes, the best friends, everything.

But it wasn’t enough, her sister still surpassed her, and she was the one to have the reins of the company.

That was the one thing Cathy wanted more than anything, but she couldn’t have it. She decided not to throw a tantrum about it(although she probably did in private, with her friends) and just tried to find a career path. She was good with social events, she had quite a lot of money, and her social network was incredible. So she just started hosting events to help different organizations. And that’s all she’s been doing, but she does A LOT of those. 

CECELIA ROSE looks an awful lot like SHAILENE WOODLEY. SHE is TWENTY-SIX and while they're CREATIVE, they have a tendency to get pretty FRIVOLOUS. You’ve probably seen them around Kola listening to BOULEVARD OF BROKEN DREAMS by GREEN DAY.

Okay so as a kid, Cece was always super creative, and she had amazing writing skills. She’d write stories and her parents would just be amazed by all of that.

They started sending her short stories to magazines, some got published, some didn’t, but she always had positive feedbacks about those.

She was only 16 when she published her first novel. AND BOY WAS IT POPULAR! Sure, she finished high school(she was still in junior year at that time) but already she had colleges fighting for her, and internships propositions. One of those, she just couldn’t say no to.

So right after high school, she became an intern to a famous author, one that already had countless books to their name. But it wasn’t what she expected. It was so much pressure, so much negative feedback, her writing got worse and worse. By the time she left, nothing she published made any wave, barely even selling anything. 

It was hard for her, and with what money she made, Cece left Philadelphia and started travelling around the world. She still took some notes down, but she was mostly focused on finding herself. That... honestly didn’t really work, by the time she got back to the States, she already had enough drabbles to write a few stories.

So she started writing again, but instead of going back to Philadelphia, she stayed in the South, in Kola, hoping maybe it would help her become the writer she once was again.

ELYSIA VAN HASSELT looks an awful lot like TAISSA FARMIGA. SHE is TWENTY-THREE and while they're INDEPENDENT, they have a tendency to get pretty BITTER. You’ve probably seen them around Kola listening to THE ONLY EXCEPTION by PARAMORE.

Her family is Dutch, her grandparents moving to Kola in their early 20s. They were friends, and moved next to each other. With the story of how her parents fell in love, with them being friends the moment they were born, she always believed they were soulmates, and everyone had one somewhere.

So as a kid, she was super sweet, kinda shy even, but she really tried her best to go to others because she still loved meeting new people, it was just hard for her to do the first steps.

She did amazing in school, and honestly she was really happy with her life and Ezra. Probs believed she found her soulmate just like her parents did.

But then he left, and it broke her heart. She distanced herself from people, claiming love didn’t exist and just became an overall meaner and bitter person.

She never went to college, her heart not in it anymore, and just started working in a music/film shop. She probs spends more time listening to music and watching movies in her room than outside.

FLORENCE KNEEN looks an awful lot like MADELAINE PETSCH. SHE is TWENTY-TWO and while they're OUTGOING, they have a tendency to get pretty DEFENSIVE. You’ve probably seen them around Kola listening to BREAKAWAY by KELLY CLARKSON.

Grew up poor, in a small town of Nevada, but had big dreams. Her parents actually didn’t want to crush her childhood dreams of becoming a big name in Hollywood, they just encouraged her smh.

So her original plan was to become an actress, but after staring in a few school productions, she realized maybe that’s not what she wanted? Instead, she started working backstage, and that’s where her true love was.

Even if they were poor, she always loved to be dressed nicely so she shopped in the best cheap spots and even if it was no big brands, in her small town, it looked super fancy.

But then she got a scholarship to go study film directing in Kola and she just looked like she was wearing cheap clothes all the time.

BUT SHE DIDN’T CARE BECAUSE SHE WAS DOING WHAT SHE LOVED. Throughout her studies, she produced a few short films, which were all pretty good and loved by everyone. Now that she’s graduated, she’s trying to become famous, trying to get more of her movies approved and shit.

Has no intention of ever going back to Nevada.

LIONEL RUBIO looks an awful lot like OSCAR ISAAC. HE is FORTY and while they're HARDWORKING, they have a tendency to get pretty UNDISCIPLINED. You’ve probably seen them around Kola listening to BELIEVER by IMAGINE DRAGONS. 

Lionel was the youngest of three child. He had a brother(10 years older) and a sister(4years older). And both of the youngest were kinda scared of the oldest, since he was a lot ruder and more violent, ya know?

But Lionel was close to his sister, and she genuinely loved playing with him as a kid even if they were 4 years apart.

But then when he was 10, he kinda always had the feeling his brother was dipping in something illegal? And he was right. Their parents were gone for the weekend, so he’d been asked to watch over his siblings. But really he just brought a bunch of scary looking dudes with guns and what his 10-year-old mind thought was bags of sugar. But obvs it wasn’t.

His sister discreetly made her way to his room, and convinced him to sneak out(since he was smaller, he had less chances of getting caught) and go to the neighbour to call the cops. So he did, while she was trying to distract the men. So at 10 years, he got his brother arrested.

Then he just contemplated becoming a cop. Because the ones who came were really nice to him and they told him all those pretty words about how brave he and his sister were. So he just became a cop.

Skip a few years, he’s got a few issues following orders at times, but he’s probs the best cop they have in the station. He got approached then by the FBI and just... went for it. He still has troubles with orders at times, but he just puts his life on the line every single time, probs gets hurt a lot too.

PHILIP MCGEE looks an awful lot like DACRE MONTGOMERY. HE is TWENTY-THREE and while they're CARING, they have a tendency to get pretty VIOLENT. You’ve probably seen them around Kola listening to DNA by LIA MARIE JOHNSON. 

ABUSE TW

Say hi to my broken boy Philip. He grew up in an abusive home, although it used to be only towards his mother. His dad was violent, but he never realized it was wrong because he was a kid and his mom pretended it was fine.

But then his mom left when he was 12, not saying anything, she was just gone. So his dad turned his anger on him, claiming he was worthless and all their problems were because of him. It was only verbal at first, but when he was 15, he started showing to school with some bruises(although he tried to cover them, or just said he was clumsy and fell in the stairs.)

People were suspicious, but honestly no investigation lead to anything, until he was 18. It was then that he finally confessed everything, and his dad was taken away. The reason: he himself got angry and punched a wall, and he got scared if it would go on like that, he’d turn just like his dad.

So now that his dad was gone, Philip was finally free to do what he wanted, and travel, which is something he was never allowed to(he never step foot outside his town before then).

He travelled a lot across the States, even some part of Canada, before settling in Kola 2 years ago. Because he enrolled in college there, in criminality.

Now he lives in dorms, and has a part time job. He still has some anger issues but he tries to control them because he’s actually the sweetest dude you’ve ever met.

[scoupssolo]

*insert darth vader no scream* smh but its ok!! At least we got to replying, that is all good with me cx

Ahh ruby is one i keep coming back, like constantly. Its my main song I played so far (right behind tiger inside. I blame minho doing the cover lolol) for the new year and honestly, not complaining. I could do an essay about how much I love the orchestral opening and how it tricks you before it switches 180 on the listener BUT I write way too much as it is so tldr be blessed with musical genius stuff with ruby when listening to it

Oohhh a gfx tutorial would be fun to see (I love seeing how people do their creations, like everyone has their own little dazzle to the steps and it is fun seeing how it becomes the finished product!) But only do it if you wanna and have time! No doubt probably would take time to do one so while I am curious on your process, I can understand if not showing! Lolol tbh your gfx style doesn't seem, like all over the place? (Now mine...we don't talk about them) like they feel like a cohesive style regardless? There is a theme i think, its very artsy yet put together? Idk how to explain it im sorry fjsjdjsj. Me and my friend do praise you for the gfx, like we dubbed you a wizard because how do you make them so pretty but also simple sometimes? (Speaking of your stuff, I don't think I thanked you for your resource pack? Thank you for it :D helped me out a bit with a creation or two)

But agreed!! Groups are bound to have loads of content so you will find one you missed even when active and up to date! Ahh yes, yes!! It feels very special to be like "in on the joke" so to speak. I love watching content where fans edit moments like say a going seventeen episode to make a summary but also include the funny moments. That helped me alot with getting into groups like skz. Also thank you, I can't help but feel annoying at times(?) Especially to you since you have better things to do than to talk to a random potato on anon jdjsjdjjs

But to slightly go off topic, how are you dreamy!? Outside from carrying tumblr with your creations of course, someone give dreamy the back massage they need for that btw

hiiii sorry i keep getting distracted asfgzds i SWEAR my brain just cannot retain that im supposed to DO things, like reply to asks >.<

plus i had my little hiatus right after u sent me these asks :(((

anywayyy

omg i agree about the tiger inside! i didnt even listen to it when the super m version came out but ive watched minho's fancam and the stage so much the song has totally grown on me lmao

I realized that i TECHNICALLY did post a video of me making some gfx but it wasnt really a tutorial it was just me speeding up the screen recording so i highly doubt its helpful its here if u wanna see it tho lmao ahfzbdjns i cant believe you talk about my stuff tho like???? ah thats crazy i feel like im unworthy of ppl discussing my stuff but im absolutely honored you like it enough to do so 🥺🥺 I should totally makanotherer resource pack at some point, maybe when my skz blog hits a milestone since its closer lol but thats really cool its helped you!! i jsut threw a bunch of things i use often into it and was like if one person even likes this a little i'll be happy! so im really glad its helped you 🥰

I think the way I usually get into groups is slide shows that me and a couple of my friends make. The process of making a slideshow about a group really helps focus on learning things and then receiving slideshows is so fun and a great way to learn ^^ we make them on google docs and then facetime to present them lol. we have so many at this point, for like almost every group we like lol. my skz one is MASSIVE

also i definitely do NOT have better things to do than to talk to you i swear, im just REALLY bad at answering asks because my grammar is so bad i have to put more mental power into it, but i totally get excited to see you sending me asks!!!

as for me?? im doing good, better than i was a few days ago (which is why i was up to finally answering you, im sorry it took me forever again) trying to be more active on my svt blog since i havent made a lot of content recently, but i think ive done better this week lmao

I hope youre doing well my dear! are you gonna wtch the skz fanmeet thats next week? i know some ppl cant afford it so im thinking of recording it liek i did with the soop 🤫

[weeklyrapgods-blog]

How could you judge an album mad quick without listening to it a few times. My synopsis after a few repeated listens, I can honestly say that I like the album, but I’m not completely blown away by it. Still has to grow on me a little more. I guess you can say that I’m biased in a way cause Nas is one of my favorite rappers ever. Personally, I enjoy his music and I always look for the greatness within it rather than the flaws. Before I dive into this review, I’m going to say that I like 4 out of the 7 songs: “White Label”, “Simple Things”, “Bonjour” and “Adam and Eve”, which is more than half of the album. So you can say it’s very good, but not the Nas I expected after such a long hiatus. I’m still gonna continue to bump it though.

Since he dropped it, I’ve read every hip hop internet nerds’ post on what Nas should have done, what beats he could have picked, how he should have used the same producers from Illmatic, blah, blah, blah. Some of y’all have never been in a studio, picked beats, and wrote music before. And some of you have. But I respect him for taking a chance with Kanye, even though Ye, to put it bluntly, is an ass. It was a really big gamble for Nas to lend his brand to Kanye with all his craziness right now. I guess he just wanted to try something new.

It would have been crazy if Nas had some of the beats Kanye made earlier in his career. But unfortunately that wasn’t the case. Everybody wants Nas to recreate an album he made when he was a teenager. To some people, nothing he ever does will compare to that. But for me, Lost Tapes was his best. It has resonated with me. And those were supposed to be his outtakes. Imagine? SMH. As an artist, no matter how many years you’ve been in the game, you want to work with new people, explore new sounds, and ride a different wave. And Nasir is a reflection of that. It is fresh, but not his best. This album would be a great segue into his next album. I hope he doesn’t wait too long.

Nas’ beat choices haven’t always been the best after Illmatic, but he always had a way of elevating any beat he touched with his bars. Every one of those albums had a few gems, and then other good joints that were debatable. With this line off “Simple Things”, he addresses the mass media on this matter: “never sold a record for a beat, it’s my verses they purchase, without production I’m worthless, but I’m more than the surface…” which is one of my favorite joints on the album.

Anyway, you can’t deny the head bop on “Adam and Eve”. I don’t think it’s a coincidence that Kanye used the same sample Bay Area’s The Architect used for a remix he did of “No Ideas Original” off of a mixtape called The Architect X Nasty Nas (Remixes). And then they also used the same album cover from The Architect & Nowaah the Flood‘s Trill Life Mathematik album. I guess he thought both were good ideas and hooked the sample up for Nas to really rhyme on instead of a remix under some older vocals. Do we forgive the slight biting or just dismiss it as a coincidence? That’s up to you. Nas’ short album is still better than a lot of people’s albums. But not better than Black Thought’s new EP with 9th Wonder. Nas and Thought are both my top 2 emcees. That’s just my opinion.

Soooooo “Not for Radio” beat was cool, but wasn’t a good set off to me. I don’t know if he did this on purpose or was this Ye rubbing off on him. But slavery wasn’t a choice. So some lines like Willie Lynch being a myth is false. He was a notorious slave master that wrote books and gave speeches to other slave owners on how to keep blacks mentally and physically enslaved. The word “lynching” was named after him; years later black people still suffer from those tactics used by him. Edgar Hoover was not black, as far as I know. Maybe Nas did some deep ancestry search and found that he had great great black grand parents. I don’t know. LMAO! Fox Broadcasting Company was founded by Rupert Murdoch, so what black guy was Nas speaking of? I wanted him to elaborate on those lines a little more, but a quick fact check could prove those to be false, which made it hard for me to get into that song.

“Everything” was okay. I could do without the singing. And the beat was weak sauce. But once again, the bars are dope: “when the media slings mud, we use it to build huts, irrefutable facts, beautiful merciful blacks…” When you listen to the hook, you would think he would talk more about the things he wants to change sort of like what he did on “If I Ruled the World”. But then again, the hook does say “don’t think the same as everyone else“. Here’s a another standout lyric from the song, “go and write whatever blog messiness is never the god, do what’s necessary I’m never worried…” Everything is cool, but…

“Bonjour”, on the other hand, was dope as fuck. I love Nas’ slow flow on that. “She didn’t see me coming, now she’s an eyewitness…” LMAO! Simple and clever. “Cops Shot the Kid” has a dope Slick Rick sample. I loved the way they freaked it. But the beat is so-so, and lyrically I feel like it was missing that venom.

Okay. I’m going to conclude it with “White Label”. Dope beat. Dope lyrics like, “laying on the most expensive beds, still I’m loosing sleep…”  I just fuck with the way Nas drops his bars like, “what you love could kill you, like a heart physician who dies from a heart attack…” It’s safe to say he is still one of the best, whether he picks the best beats or not.

Tell us your thoughts on the ‘Nasir’ album in the comment section below

Is “Nasir” Overrated or Under-Appreciated? How could you judge an album mad quick without listening to it a few times. My synopsis after a few repeated listens, I can honestly say that I like the album, but I’m not completely blown away by it.

[i-am-very-very-tired]

April says:JUNE 20, 2016 AT 2:04 PMREPLY

Relaxed4life says:AUGUST 4, 2016 AT 10:11 PMREPLY

Azarmiah says:OCTOBER 5, 2016 AT 8:05 AMREPLY

Amor Amankwah says:OCTOBER 8, 2016 AT 4:47 PMREPLY

Touche! Well said! You hit the nail on the head.

Preach it beee!! Amen and A. men!!

If your natural you know that those styles help reduce tangles i personally dont wear them no reason i havent masterd them as of yet and and doesnt take nothing nut humidity and a wash to get you back to its natural state. Hey check out this video by angel ikyg called black women natural hair its not a bashing video he gives good reasoning to go natural if u feel the same way after watching the video then keep getting relaxers by all means because its your hair have a good day

Dude I always felt the same way. You manipulating your hair to get your curls a certain way says a lot.

Seriously why be so negative? Some people don’t like curly hair or braids but prefer straight hair. Quite frankly some women don’t look good with either hair style. Yeah one can argue that a black woman can achieve straight hair with natural hair but do you know how much more damage will occur than by doing relaxers. If you actually read this woman’s blog you would see her hair is healthy and relaxed. So stop hair shaming and accept the fact that people can have different hair styles and still have healthy hair.

Monique Peterkin says:JANUARY 29, 2017 AT 4:44 PMREPLY

Exactly- this kind of thinking [shaming others hardcore because they have a different view period; be it hair, philosophy, belief, etc,] is and has been completely counterproductive, deleterious, and frankly, embarrassing. We are not a monolith*and there is no “real Black” mind or character. We really need to STOP IT. Where, oh where has it really gotten us as a people in the world? ##!% it.

Everything isn’t for everyone. I am relaxed and I’ve NEVER had anyone else’s hair in my head in my life. My hair is long (bra strap length) and healthy. I’ve never had a desire to go natural because I like the way my hair is when relaxed. My roller wraps and easy maintenance hair works for ME & my life & that my friend is how that works out. I will not apologize or be ashamed of MY choice for MY hair. I am team #CreamyCrack.

There are lots of things we do that aren’t ‘natural’. Do you wear make up? Thats not natural. When people wear braids the extensions they use aren’t natural. When people flat iron their natural hair thats not natural or when people wear weave and wigs over their natural hair- not natural either. Big Deal! People are so busy pointing the finger and telling other people what they should do or think that they don’t realise they are a bunch of hypocrites.

I disagree and can I give you an analogy and you may never agree but this is mine. People over time have used inventions to make their life easier doesn’t mean they don’t embrace their culture our heritage but they are doing things to.save time and effort. Ex. Pencil to typewriter to computer Records to cd to downloads For some not all healthy relaxed hair makes our lives more manageable and easier. I love natural hair but please respect me too and recognize that for me and my course hair it’s much easier.

Where “someone’s” hair means?? Oh pls… Its about time judging stopped!! Its the same hair ok? Jux that others prefer to relax it. And yes… Natural isnt for everyone means… Not everyone wants to keep their hair kinky or natural… Its jux hair ok!? Anyone has the right to do whatever!

Sometimes natural hair does not fit your personality or lifestyle. Its similar to how some people do not prefer their own hair color and choose to dye it.

I agree with you 100%. I think if it grows out your head it obviously is for you. lol Im natural and I don’t judge whether you make a decision to relax or not relax, i really don’t care what you do to your head. But what we’re not gonna do in these comments is say that natural “poofy” hair is “unprofessional”. That is the real issue. What is professional? Straight flat hair? I don’t like that stigma at all. And also side note, natural hair products typically are organic or healthy for your scalp most of the time. Relaxer literally burns your scalp and has your hair fall out if it’s in too long lol it can’t be that safe when used in the long term. But i’m not the one who is making the decision so who cares about my opinion anyway lol

Montia says:JUNE 12, 2016 AT 6:37 AM

REPLY

Hey Lauren,

I have been a home relaxer for years! Do you have any suggestions for beach hair or what to do to protect your hair at the pool? It’s vacation season so wanted a little product help!

Thanks Montia

Lauren says:JUNE 14, 2016 AT 9:35 AMREPLY

Hey!

I’ve heard that some women coat their hair with oil of deep conditioner before getting into the water – something about your hair soaking up the moisturizing product and not having enough room to soak up chlorinated water. Just be careful – wouldn’t want to have an obvious slick of oil behind you as you dunk in the water! If I know I’ll be in water a lot (i.e. vacation), I’ll put it into a protective style like Marley Twists or Box Braids. Hope that helps!

Pam says:MAY 30, 2016 AT 9:30 AM

REPLY

I’m so glad I read your post, I have been natural for 5’years now, I have seen some growth but not the amazing results that I expected. I also think my hair seemed much healthier when I had a relaxer, thank you for helping me realize that natural does not always mean better and since everyone’s hair is different you should do what works for you.

Fahyolah says:APRIL 11, 2016 AT 4:49 PM

REPLY

Wow. I came across this post and your first paragraph alone had me! I am sick and tired of everyone portraying relaxed hair as the culprit of all hair problems. There is a way to have healthy relaxed hair and I dislike when I am made to feel guilty about my decision to keep my hair relaxed (I’m not “ashamed” of my natural hair, I just prefer it straight). Thank you, thank you, thank you for posting such a rare opposition in a world filled with individuals shunning relaxed hair!

Mesha says:APRIL 27, 2016 AT 11:54 AMREPLY

Wow! Im going through this now. Havent relaxed my hair in almost a year and its coming out, dry and hard to manage. I honestly dont see what all the hype is about natural hair. I guess its personal choice and the type of hair you have. Some people make natural seem easy but then their hair grade is “naturally” nice! My hair is coarse, dry, thick yet brittle and I hate that. Call it what you want, im Europeanized whatever im not with that and love healthy looking moisturized hair, im getting a perm asap!!!

Faith says:APRIL 2, 2016 AT 5:57 PM

REPLY

I also tried to go the natural route… this is my second year now, but my hair was honestly healthiest when I used to relax it. Now my natural hair just sheds so much and is super dit. regardless of what I do to it. My mind is made as I take off my braids in relaxing it. And shall be proudly rocking it.

Abigail Mai. says:APRIL 1, 2016 AT 11:21 AM

REPLY

I know this post its old but I feel like I need to post a comment lol. I’ve been natural for three years but things are getting out of hand now, I just can’t do this anymore. I’m glad I found this blog. I’m planning to relax my hair tomorrow and get a pixie cut. I’m so nervous. Nice post! Your hair is gorgeous!

I am at my 3 year mark as well and I’m fed up..smh when yu relaxed what relaxer did you use.

Lauren says:APRIL 7, 2016 AT 10:25 AMREPLY

Tips & materials before you relax your hair at home Relax your hair at home, by yourself, the RIGHT way! Dr. Miracle’s Feel It Formula Thermalceutical Intensive No-Lye Relaxer (Regular Strength)

So how did it go? Reading these comments, I think I have made up my mind. After almost 10 yrs of being natural, I hate it. It takes me up to 3 hrs to straighten it and it still looks a hot mess and all I can do is pull it back. I was looking at my pictures from college and I loved the relaxed look. So much easier in my opinion and my hands and arms don’t feel like they are going to fall off. Any pointers? I’ll prob just go back to the olive oil relaxer.

Kiki says:MARCH 24, 2016 AT 11:54 PM

REPLY

Natural isn’t for everyone! My hair broke in the center and both sides while shedding everywhere else. So I cut it down to where it broke, half of my shoulder length hair, to start all over again. I did one Aphogee treatment, then a week later, hit it with ORS relaxer, problem solved! A year and a few months later, my hair is back down on my shoulders. I’ll never go natural ever again! Moisturizing shampoos & conditioners are a must!

Molly

says:FEBRUARY 28, 2016 AT 6:10 PM

REPLY

Hi! In 2010 my hair fell out, and I spent the next year-and-a-half in weaves. 18 months later I’m natural and my hair is at my shoulders. It was pretty when straight, but would not stay. It would not hold a style. So I get a relaxer, and my hair starts shedding badly. (The bad reactions were caused my coconut oil as it made my hair dry and brittle, but I just found that out a few months ago) then I get psoriasis from an autoimmune condition so bad my scalp bleeds. So for another two years I stop relaxers. My hair kept shedding and getting dryer( too much protien) finally I went back to relaxers but only to loosen the curl. Now my styles stay. I’m still shedding from a chronic illness and the protien, but my hair is bra band length. Yesterday I went to a new salon, doctors orders, and the stylist said my “natural hair” is so healthy! And that I should let it all go natural. Well, none of it is natural! My ends are just straight because of a bad beautician. I relax my hair every four or so months to loosen the tightness and I love this method. Even the white girls raved after the beautician finished styling it. My hair when straight looks exactly like brand new weave, and I missed that when natural. I mean I could get it just as silky but it wouldn’t stay.. So texlaxsing is my ne strategy.

Lauren says:APRIL 5, 2016 AT 10:45 AMREPLY

I’m so glad you were able to find something that works for you , even with those challenges!

CAH says:FEBRUARY 8, 2016 AT 7:41 PM

REPLY

I’ve been natural off and on for over 10 years. This weekend I just texlaxed my hair because I wanted versatility. I wanted to be able to straighten my hair without all the excessive heat used when pressing natural hair but I also wanted to have a little texture left so I can still do my wash n’ go’s. It’s sad that we have to justify how we choose to wear our hair.

Deva says:FEBRUARY 2, 2016 AT 11:13 AM

REPLY

Thanks for this. I’ve never felt threatened with the thought of going natural. I’m texlaxed and have been my whole life. I can honestly say that although i enjoy the look of natural hair, I don’t have time for the maintenance. My relaxer has done me well and I’ll keep that chemical in my head for as long as I can.

Micah says:JANUARY 15, 2016 AT 9:13 AM

REPLY

I have been free from the creamy crack for 8 years but today I’m so over it I was frustrated with my hair was about to make an appointment for my hairdresser and I’m just like I’m so tired of this and then I said wait what am I trying to prove I’m going to go get me a relaxer and that’s exactly what I’m going to do! MY QUESTION is what relaxer should I use???? since it’s been so long I don’t want my hair to fall out

SincerelyAlexisJ

says:JANUARY 13, 2016 AT 5:16 AM

REPLY

Omg , I’m so upset that I just found this post . But I’m extremely happy at the same time ! This post and all the comments made me realize that it’s okay to keep my relaxed hair and not feel bad about it because everybody’s on this natural kick! I had THICK just above my shoulder length hair all my life(I’m 25 now). In August , I noticed my hair just wouldn’t get bone straight anymore when I relaxed it , went through 3 different perms and it just wouldn’t get straight. And because I have such thick and hard to manage hair, it would look like I still needed a perm. So I let my sister in law talk me into going natural(SMH!). The first two times she washed and flat ironed my hair(two weeks apart) , it looked nice . Then it kind of went down hill from there . My hair became SUPER thick , the thickest I had ever seen it before , I could not comb through it , it wouldn’t lay down , it was super dry no matter what I would put on it , etc . Then I noticed that when she would flat iron it , it started looking thinner and thinner.

Towards the ending of November I noticed the back of hair completely broke off ! My mom and I were so upset with what was going on with my hair so by the end of December , I decided to go back to my perms. I permed my hair for the first time since August on January 4th(last Thursday) and while I was in the shower A LOT of my hair was coming out in clumps. Not big clumps , but still they were noticeable clumps. After my protein treatment and deep conditioner , I blow dried my hair and saw that my hair had broken off in the middle of my head as well , not as bad as the back though. Also , when I was “natural” , when I would TRY to comb it , a lot of hair would be let left in the comb.

I’m very inclined to believe that all that heat that was being put on my hair caused a lot of damage, as well as it being soo dry. So I have to admit while I was natural that is when I noticed my hair started to fall out.

What do you think I should do to get it back healthy and growing again ? I’ve always had thick and dry hair and I’ve always done deep conditioners every week to retain the moisture , so I know that’s a given. But what else? Please help me , I’m miss my hair so much!

Adetomi says:MARCH 5, 2016 AT 7:36 PMREPLY

Cut the hair and start over. That’s the only way

Alexis says:JANUARY 13, 2016 AT 5:12 AM

REPLY

Omg , I’m so upset that I just found this post . But I’m extremely happy at the same time ! This post and all the comments made me realize that it’s okay to keep my relaxed hair and not feel bad about it because everybody’s on this natural kick! I had THICK just above my shoulder length hair all my life(I’m 25 now). In August , I noticed my hair just wouldn’t get bone straight anymore when I relaxed it , went through 3 different perms and it just wouldn’t get straight. And because I have such thick and hard to manage hair, it would look like I still needed a perm. So I let my sister in law talk me into going natural(SMH!). The first two times she washed and flat ironed my hair(two weeks apart) , it looked nice . Then it kind of went down hill from there . My hair became SUPER thick , the thickest I had ever seen it before , I could not comb through it , it wouldn’t lay down , it was super dry no matter what I would put on it , etc . Then I noticed that when she would flat iron it , it started looking thinner and thinner.

Towards the ending of November I noticed the back of hair completely broke off ! My mom and I were so upset with what was going on with my hair so by the end of December , I decided to go back to my perms. I permed my hair for the first time since August on January 4th(last Thursday) and while I was in the shower A LOT of my hair was coming out in clumps. Not big clumps , but still they were noticeable clumps. After my protein treatment and deep conditioner , I blow dried my hair and saw that my hair had broken off in the middle of my head as well , not as bad as the back though. Also , when I was “natural” , when I would TRY to comb it , a lot of hair would be let left in the comb.

I’m very inclined to believe that all that heat that was being put on my hair caused a lot of damage, as well as it being soo dry. So I have to admit while I was natural that is when I noticed my hair started to fall out.

What do you think I should do to get it back healthy and growing again ? I’ve always had thick and dry hair and I’ve always done deep conditioners every week to retain the moisture , so I know that’s a given. But what else? Please help me , I’m miss my hair so much!

Niquole Abram

says:JANUARY 13, 2016 AT 12:01 AM

REPLY

I love this post so much! One of my coworkers was formally relaxed and is now natural and for her it was the best thing ever. For me on the other hand, I know I will relax until I can no longer relax my hair. I’ve had it done since I was at least 8 years old, I’m 27 and I love how my hair looks after.

I took over the reins when I was 12 and can now apply it in less than 7 minutes. I may have timed it a few times… Haha! It’s so much easier to manage as well. I can tell when it’s almost time because I notice it’s harder to comb thru or brush in general and to wash. Once it’s been relaxed, I’m golden!

I spend less time fussing over my hair with it relaxed than if I were to go natural. I’m half black so I think my natural hair texture would be a 3c/4b combination? Afterwards it relaxes to a 2b wavy/surly texture if that. I have flat iron and a blow dryer although I can’t work the blowdryer to save my life and the Flatiron may used once or twice a month to check on my length or do a trim.

I’m determined to prove that just because my hair is relaxed, does not mean I can’t have long and healthy hair. I’m on my way to hip length right now, it was at chin length about 2 years ago and now it’s down to just past my bra strap.

When I tell people that my hair is actually relaxed their jaws drop, a reaction I will never get tired of! What I do to lessen the damage of the relaxer that inevitably gets on the length is I’ll coat that portion of my hair with coconut oil. It seems to provide a bit of a barrier between my hair and relaxer so it doesn’t damage the previously relaxed hair as much. Also with my last relaxer, I did a henna treatment that next day. My roots felt like normal.

You know after a relaxer your roots fill a bit of dry even a little straw like? After doing the henna it felt perfectly fine! I’ve noticed that weird texture seems to go away within a week or so and the henna treatment seem to speed up that process so I think I’ll do henna after I do my relaxer as well.

jada says:DECEMBER 20, 2015 AT 10:39 PM

REPLY

What do You do if You have a lot of Breakage an shedding? I haven’t had a perm in 2 months but i’m thinking about getting a perm because i want my hair to be straight an healthy. Do you have anything like Products to recommend for breakage, shedding and promoting hair growth ?

Chaka Khan

says:DECEMBER 16, 2015 AT 12:58 PM

REPLY

Thank you so much, I am a year and a half out with natural hair and I hate it. I agree it takes to long to get it how I like it and I feel it was much healthier, when I permed it. It grew much faster. I will be switching back after the first of the year. Thank you again for all the tutorials.

Kalisha Adams says:DECEMBER 9, 2015 AT 9:33 AM

REPLY

your hair is amazing and keep up the good work!

Lauren says:JANUARY 7, 2016 AT 12:11 PMREPLY

Thanks girl =)

V-Yella Westcoast

says:DECEMBER 2, 2015 AT 10:03 PM

REPLY

I agree with Lauren, you can have healthy straight relaxed hair. Straight hair is easier to manage.

[ohsoethical]

Fourth Anniversary of the Rana Plaza Collapse- my thoughts.

Photography by Rahul Talukder

Today marks the fourth anniversary of an incident that left the world horrified, as we witnessed the deplorable consequences of corporate greed and capitalism.

On 24th April 2013, 8am, 3639 workers refused to enter the eight-storey Rana Plaza factory building in Bangladesh, due to visible cracks in the wall that evidently posed a threat to the workers’ lives. In response, the owner Sohel Rana, brought paid gang members to beat the workers, forcing them to work, with threats that they would not be paid that month. They reluctantly went in.

At 8:45am, the 8 storey building collapsed.

1,137 have been confirmed dead, with over 200 remaining missing. Tales of workers trapped in the rubble with no choice but to saw their own limbs off to escape, of workers trapped within the collapse for days without food or water, surrounded by dead bodies. Of the families who had to identify their deceased family members, only to find that the bodies had been so deformed by the collapse they were almost  unrecognisable. The suffering of the injured workers who are no longer physically capable of working, plummeting them into further poverty. The orphans who lost either one or both parents. The workers who survived, but must face on going psychological torment, as they return to work in the garment factories.

Photography by Rahul Talukder

What makes things worse is the amount of pressure required to force retailers whose clothes had been found in the factory to compensate the victims and the families of the victims. Indeed, while some did pay up, others, notably Benetton, required intense pressure from campaigners before they gave in. Why they felt they were in no position to support these families is beyond me.

For the past four years since the accident, activists around the world have marked this day as Fashion Revolution Day, and the week it takes place in as Fashion Revolution Week. During this time, people all around the world ask big businesses who made their clothes, highlighting consumer concern for the workers behind their clothes and the need to hold corporations accountable for their workers’ wellbeing.

Demand for the fashion industry to check themselves has increased, and it is refreshing to see fast fashion corporations becoming more transparent, as well as some improvements being shown.

What I cannot deal with however, is the recurring news stories on factory fires from Vietnam to India, garment workers fainting en masse in Cambodia due to lack of nutrition, exhaustion and sweltering heat, young Dalit girls in Tamil Nadu being sexually exploited and abused through the Sumangali System (an agreement that women work in return for dowry required for marriage), women having abortions or working up til pregnancy to avoid being fired, impoverished communities being struck with high levels of cancer and disease due to corporations polluting their land with toxic materials or compelling workers to use hazardous materials, the cotton farmers committing suicide because they cannot keep up with the impossible debt they are put in.

The worst part? We are all unwillingly complicit in this cycle of exploitation, through a system called ‘fast fashion.’

Fast fashion simply refers to when retailers pick up trends from the catwalk, and push them out at large quantities to consumers as cheaply as possible. However, with trends now rapidly changing faster than ever, due to factors such as instant coverage of increasingly frequent fashion shows and online accessibility to new styles, retailers must keep up in order to meet consumer desires. For example, in Zara, designs will stay on sale for a maximum of four weeks. If Zara launch a particular product that doesn’t sell within a week, it is withdrawn, orders are cancelled and new designs are formulated, further highlighting their dedication to consumer demands.

As fast fashion retailers continue to push out new collections in large quantities and short spaces of time, this creates impossible targets for garment workers to reach in terms of clothes required to be made. This is why retailers aim to set up factories in developing countries, where the impoverished are in desperate need of work, where wages can be kept low, and where laws supporting the rights of garment workers are weak. This allows corporations to exploit workers more easily, with workers being faced with long hours, limited breaks, poor working conditions, poor pay, as well as physical, verbal, and sexual abuse.

Smh.

As someone who has always loved designing clothes, combining materials, mixing my cultures via fabric, using my wardrobe to express political views- I feel evermore compelled to fight this battle. I love clothes, but fashion is absolute bull. As my fave Tansy Hoskins explained in an article, fashion today is a facade of ‘choice and empowerment’, a beacon of creativity, but intentionally refuses to acknowledge that it is held up by and dependent on the exploitation of the impoverished.

This is evident in the glorifying of fashion on social media. Particularly, it is the rise of the fashion blogger that has made me increasingly alarmed with this lack of accountability the fashion industry gets away with. Every time I see an Insta post with a caption saying something like ‘OMG I’M ADDICTED TO SHOES’ ‘SOMEONE TELL ME HOW TO STOP BUYING CLOTHES’ ‘I CAN’T STOP BUYING CLOTHES’ ‘RETAIL THERAPY’, and all these clothing hauls, it makes me sad that corporations have really worked their magic on us. Through persuading us that the only way we can be deemed as successful, the only way we can be happy, is by purchasing clothes that only provide a short term happiness which eventually fades until we get our next fix of ‘retail therapy’, they are truly feeding on our insecurities and the susceptibility of our subconscious to external messages. I can honestly say, most of this realisation has come from analysing myself and my responses to the world, and trust me it is a constant struggle battling between the messages we receive from society and my own consciousness.

At the end of the day, as much as society compels us to think fashion, style etc is the epitome of social success and happiness, we need to remind ourselves that this mindset is intentional, is a tactical form of marketing, and most importantly, A LIE.

The fact is, no one should have to suffer for me to be able to express myself, to be unique, to be creative, to be able to have a cute insta aesthetic and get bare likes for an ootd. As obvious as it sounds, this is the world we are in.

While I am still unsure as to how exactly we transform the fashion industry (I think about this everyday ngl lol), there is something I am sure of: You need to make your voice heard. Retailers depend on consumers to thrive, so increasing the pressure on these corporations to ensure the wellbeing of their workers is essential. Even simply @ing or emailing retailers like h&m, inquiring about workers rights has a powerful impact, especially if done collectively. In addition,  I strongly believe in the impact our own actions can have on changing the world and changing our own behaviours. By reducing the amount of unnecessary clothes we buy, mending or recycling the clothes we have, opting for secondhand garmz or even Fairtrade stuff if u got p, we can encompass a sense of consciousness for humanity with every action we take, allowing our lives to symbolise the world we want to see, and help to actually be the change we want to see.  There are also many organisations out here working actively to support garment workers around the world, such as Clean Clothes Campaign and Labour Behind the Label- check them out. I hope, both individually and collectively, we will all take a stand against this consumerist, materialistic society fuelled by capitalism. 

Anyway I'm out. I truly hope we can create a world where the greed and ego of the people at the top is overridden by the masses and our desire to care for and protect our brothers and sisters around the world. 

Mayisha

p.s. check out some of the events happening for Fashion Revolution Week this week here

Photography by Rahul Talukder