#I saw this forever ago and adored it so I've been saving it in my drafts forever

[mxrvelouss]

The Scene at the Mall (pt 2) | Mike Schmidt x Reader

warning: brief mentions of a toxic relationship and harrassment, fluff

note: be sure to read pt 1 if you haven't already! :)

also! there is a hunger games reference, see if you can spot it! ;)

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Your gentle laugh rings through Mike's ears, causing him to look at you with a wide smile. The two of you walk through the mall, hands intertwined, staring into each others' adoring eyes.

"I love my necklace," you say, softly touching the shiny piece of jewelry that sat on your chest.

"You picked it out," Mike laughs.

"Yeah, but you paid," you retort, giggling. The two of you continued to smile at each other. Oh, how you wished you could stay in this moment forever.

******

Ever since he potentially saved your life at the very same mall about a year ago, you made it a point to go there every time after work, since it was just right down the street from the restauraunt you waitressed at. And every single time, there he was, patrolling the place as a security guard.

He sure works a lot, you remember thinking to yourself. It wasn't until a few months after you met that you found out the reason for that was so he could take care of his little sister, Abby. "I'd do anything for her," he told you one night as he walked you out to your car after his shift was over. "Even if it means working a thousand hours a week- as long as it means a better life for her, I would do absolutely anything."

And now here you were, holding hands with this perfect guy. You two had offically been a couple for two and a half months now; and you had never been happier. Abby loved you, and you would help her and Mike at every possible chance. For once, the both of you were off work today, and Abby was at school- so the two of you decided to go to the mall after having breakfast at his house.

"Aren't you sick of that place?" you teased as you got into the passenger seat of his car.

"Yeah, but I want to buy you a necklace," he said, blushing. "I've been saving up."

"Mike!" you exclaim. "No. You know you don't have to get me-"

He reached over and softly put his index finger on your lip, cutting you off. "Shhh. I've made up my mind."

You sit back, sighing in mock defeat. "Alright, you win," you giggle.

Once the two of you got to the mall and went to the jewelry store, a beautiful, silver necklace with a heart at the end caught your eye. When you saw the price, however, you didn't want to ask- but it was too late. Mike already saw the way your eyes lit up, and he got a worker to get it out of the glass case before you could even react.

Mike looked over at you as the worker handed him the jewelry. "Don't feel bad. I promise this is what I want for you. Okay?"

You nodded, and he started to bring the necklace up to your neck. "May I?"

He went behind you, gently bringing the necklace over your shoulders and clasping it around your neck. The feel of his fingers against your skin made you shiver.

"There," he said, turning you around to look at the necklace.

"Mike Schmidt, you're better at putting on necklaces than me!" you laughedd.

"Well," he grinned. "I've had some practice with Abby. My mom has a few necklaces that she likes to wear sometimes." He looked down and started to shuffle his feet.

You put a hand on his shoulder. "Thank you," you said softly. You take his hands, lean in, and give him a soft kiss on the cheek.

Once Mike paid, the two of you walked out, hand in hand, and started to stroll down the area.

"It's definitely a lot easier to enjoy the mall when you don't have to work," Mike says.

Your gentle laugh rings through Mike's ears, causing him to look at you with a wide smile. The two of you walk through the mall, hands intertwined, staring into each others' adoring eyes.

"I love my necklace," you say, softly touching the shiny piece of jewelry that sat on your chest.

"But you picked it out," Mike laughs.

"Yeah, but you paid," you retort, giggling. The two of you continued to smile at each other. Oh, how you wished you could stay in this moment forever.

But all good things must come to an end, because at that moment, a voice from behind catches your attention, immediately sending chills down your spine.

"Well, well, y/n. Nice to see that you moved on."

You whip around, letting go of Mike's hand. The man (now in front of you) continues.

"It's been, what, two years since the breakup?" he sneers. "You won't be able to forget me, no matter how hard you try, y/n." Everything in you just wanted to run as far away from him as possible. This was Danny, your ex-boyfriend from high school. What started as a typical high school romance turned into a controlling, toxic relationship. You felt your cheeks turn red as Mike protectively inched closer to you. You could feel his body starting to tense up.

"Do you know him?" he asks, his voice low.

"'Course she does," Danny says. "We have a lot of...history. Don't we, y/n?" He looks down at you, a twisted smile spreading across his face.

"Why are you acting like such a creep?!" you burst out. "Leave us alone." You couldn't deal with this, not now, not ever. Things were so perfect with Mike, and now you were scared that, somehow, in some way, Danny would convince Mike that you weren't good enough for him.

Just like he convinced you you'd never fall in love again.

Suddenly Danny's eyes start to travel down your face, your neck, and then lands on your chest, where the necklace lays. You feel sick.

"Ah, so did Lover Boy over here buy you this?" Danny suddenly stretches out his arm and grabs hold of your necklace.

"What the-?!" Mike screams, shoving Danny away and grabbing hold of your hand. He places himself in front of you and Danny, who is smiling, as if he's amused by the whole situation.

"Don't you ever touch me again," you say, your voice trembling. Mike looks at you, concerned, and gives your hand a reassuring squeeze before he lets go. He walks toward Danny, inches away from his face.

"Get out of here," Mike says, his voice dangerously low. "And don't ever come near y/n again."

"Or what, Lover Boy?" Danny sneers again.

"Or I'll call the authorities and have you arrested for assault." Mike reaches into his pocket and pulls out an ID which says he's a mall security guard. "Unless you want me to do so right now? I do happen to know the head of security here..."

You smile. Go, Mike! you cheer in your head.

Danny's arrogant smile fades. He looks at you one more time. "It won't last," he says. "Soon you'll be running back to me."

"Get. Out." Mike growls. And finally, Danny turns and walks away.

Mike turns to you, grabbing hold of your hands. You start to talk. "I'm so, so sorry-"

"Hey, hey, hey, you don't have to apologize for anything," Mike says, gently placing his palm on your cheek and brushing a strand of hair out of your face. He pulls you into a hug, and you happily accept it, letting the warmth of his strong body spread over you.

"I guess you can see why that relationship didn't work out," you say into his shoulder with a weak laugh.

"Maybe you should stop going to malls," Mike jokes back as he pulls away from the embrace and looks at you with loving eyes. You chuckle, looking back into them.

"This will last," he says confidently, his hands on your shoulders.

"I know," you say with a soft smile. "And this will prove it."

You wrap your hands around his waist, pulling him forward, and softly press your lips against his. He kisses back with such love and gentleness that you just want to explode with emotion. He brings his hands through your hair and then pulls back, his hands now cupping your face.

"I love you," he whispers.

"I love you too, Mike."

[real-fire-emblem-takes]

Note: This is a bit of a ramble only tangential to FE, sorry if it is too long!

So, while my first FE was Blazing Sword, and it is still my favorite, Echoes SoV has a weird personal link to me.

I didn't really play it on release, even though I had a 3DS, I had only played the GBA trilogy and Awakening at that point. I'm from a South American country and official games (specially Physical releases) are really really expensive, so I used to buy from the Canadian Eshop, because it was considerably cheaper due to conversion shenanigans.

Echoes was the first time I bought a physical release on launch day, but I didn't buy it for myself, it was a present for my then-girlfriend that I've saved for months to buy. She is admittedly a much more hardcore FE fan than I am (She prefers the higher difficulties and did a lot of challenge runs, loved the SNES ones, and played Tear Ring Saga too, etc. ), so I thought it would be a nice 6-months-ish dating anniversary present.

She loved it, and honestly it was the only gift I gave her that she really cared about! Truth be told, our whole relationship was a bit of a mess (We were both stupid teenagers, she had depression, it was mostly a one-sided attraction thing for me, she was a bit verbally abusive with me because of untreated trauma and family issues, etc.)

Actually, to say that she loved was a severe understatement, she adored it above all else, she played the game religiously, and kept nerding out about it to me. It was a few of the experiences I had with her that I saw her eyes shine with unbridled joy, honestly those days I watched her spending playing on her 3DS were some of the best we had, and if I dare to be honest with myself, some of the best of my life.

While I didn't play the game, I watched most of her gameplay over her shoulder while I cooked real food (she subsided on Junk food & energy drinks, had anorexia and negligent parents) for her and hanged around in her house when skipping classes. So the audio and characters are burned into my memories as a little lovely part of my love for her.

This year, due to some factors I rather not go into much details, I finally gave in and un-dusted my old 3DS, Hacked it and downloaded FE Echoes. I finished it a little more than a month ago, and I fucking bawled at the credits song. This experience, not only the game, but using this as a mental link to myself of so many years ago, was the first time I felt something true in the last years. The themes and motifs of this game are utterly unparalleled to me. The characters, maps, songs! I'll love them all forever, for they are the last piece of her that lives on in my heart!

It's been 7 years since we broke up and she moved away, we haven't talked since, and I pray every day that she has found something or someone that brings her as much joy as this game brought us both, first her, and now me.

Again, sorry for the ramble, but I wanted to share this with someone! May you all have a great day!

.

[andmaybegayer]

Last Monday of the Week 2023-11-06

It was Bandcamp Friday so I'll open with a rundown.

Listening: One song per album let's go

Do The Hate by MiSLeD, off TERRORTORIES, a deeply uncomfortable sounding song.

I originally picked up MiSLeD's acoustic album a few Fridays ago and took a while to come around on their unbelievably blunt and hyperlocal style. A sledgehammer through Johannesburg concrete, I have come to love 'em. Do the Hate has an aggressive chant that makes it genuinely kind of uncomfortable to listen to and also extremely fun to yell along with.

The Length of the Chain by Chamber Mage, off their 2022 demo tape and thus far their only album release unless you go see them live.

I picked these guys up off I think the Topic Lords podcast? Solid reliable heavy metal. Can't wait to see their first full album, they're from Denver so if you're from that part of the world definitely find out if they're playing.

All On Fire by Double Sun, from the album of the same name, Pretoria boys playing bluesy punk.

One of the last bands I saw in Johannesburg before I moved. I had the three-part Dead Wreck Beach stuck in my head for a good long while. I'm still not sure what it is about Gauteng that produces so many psychedelic punk bands but I'm not complaining.

Two Jack de Quidt albums, soundtracks from Friends at the Table which I have been getting really into.

First up, The Tower, As Built By The Divine Candidate Chital, from the soundtrack for COUNTER/weight, meditative track to match the meditative and still incomplete two-player game The Tower.

Apperances of The Tower in F@TT games are always great. It's a game that the GM and composer have been working on forever and they get really, really into it.

Next, gotta be Marielda, from the season of the same name. The clarinet from this is so memorable.

The intro tracks to every game are obviously the ones you hear the most, and they're all bangers.

All Through the Night [Patrick's Version], from the Titus Andronicus demotape for their most recent album The Will to Live. Rough cuts from studio sessions.

I adore The Will to Live, when I'm honest I really don't care much for most of Titus Andronicus's work other than The Monitor and now The Will to Live. These are good at capturing what I like about live performances: performers going ham and not necessarily performing well but definitely performing the most.

And lastly, Threshold from sungazer, off the album Perihelion. This was an experimental piece combining rhythms at both extremes of human perception, with the overall rhythm of the song being as slow as possible with individual bars being impossibly fast.

There's a whole Adam Neely video on it, because he's one part of sungazer.

Alright on to the rest of the show:

Reading: Back into The Count of Monte Cristo, rapidly seeing the roots of many other stories I've read crystalize into this genre, most notable Eoin Colfer's Airman.

Watching: The various Hackaday talks that have been uploaded over the past week, some good ones lately like A Hacker's Guide to Audio and Video Formats.

Playing: on Saturday evening I finished making dinner and sat down to play Titanfall 2 from the start because for some reason my save was incomplete and I figured I'd just start over. And then it was two in the morning and I had beaten Titanfall 2. Great game.

Making: Abortive attempts at designing some adapters for my vacuum cleaner because I realized I took my reference images wrong and had to start over, fortunately before I wasted any filament.

Also Hack Week at work, so I'm working on some original code with two much, much more experienced python developers, which if nothing else is a good learning experience.

Tools and Equipment: Modern text editor configuration systems can be rigged to almost completely bootstrap themselves if given an internet connection. You should use this to your advantage. I use lazy.nvim in bootstrap mode now and it's so easy.

Side note, nvim's lua configuration mode is real nice, major improvement over vimscript when you want to do anything complicated. Sorry Tim Pope.

[carminewill]

𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐈𝐒 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐓𝐑𝐔𝐄 𝐑𝐎𝐋𝐄 𝐈𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐘?

the h̶e̶r̶o̶ villain

so we meet again, don't we? pity, I hoped our reunion would never occur. oh, pardon my discourtesy would you? but I really find tyrants unpleasant to the mouth. "sic semper evello mortem tyrannis." I have seen many before you fall, and I will see many after you descend as well. oh don't give me that hateful sneer, you more than anyone should know the expanse of my kindness, but vain little heroes are but villians in different shoes. you grew up wishing to prove yourself, you were good once, or I thought you were. maybe you were born nasty. you strove to reach the stars, for you felt unworthy, ha, perhaps you were onto something you pushed those you saw as dirty into the dirt, face down in the name of righteousness. but one does not merely hate for hatred itself. all abhorrence stems from fear. you call yourself a savior to merely stomp on the ones beneath you. would you like a bitter truth? no one's beneath you, some just strike more worry into your heart. are they better than you? as much as I'd adore saying yes, there might still be hope for you yet. after you swallow a few slices of humble pie, and wake up to reality. you cannot force anyone to change. you cannot force anyone to do anything. it is as simple as that. reality has very few set rules and somehow even then people find a way to break them. you're not a god, little beast. it's time you stopped acting like one, for one day a real god will smite you where you stand, and they will be disguised as the "lesser" people you mock so bitterly.

the fallen prodigy

hello old friend, it's been a while hasn't it? I remember when you were just a child, gape-smiled and beaming like the sun. where have you laid your youth to rest my love? is it buried beside your heart perhaps? I know how deeply life has wounded you, it took away everything, didn't it? oh poor soul, you held onto happiness with bloody, shaking hands but still fate ripped even that away from you. your past lovers are dead or did some betray you? turning away in fear of what they once admired. your comrades have been slain, or their priorities shifted. I've heard you too have changed your way of thought. the people fear you now, do they normally cower at the sound of your name? ah don't fret, that makes two of us. the masses tend to despise the things they do not have the will to comprehend. the villian finds sympathy for you don't they, well I could have seen that from a mile away. you two are the oldest friends, you made a deal with them correct? to save your late love, they tried to hold their end of the bargain, really, but I fear you are cursed to forever be despondent. oh what a sad and miserable life without love. is that why you chase loneliness? for is it truly a life of sorrow if you yourself has chosen it? but don't become bitter from the pain. trust when I say I have seen wounds unfold a man, turning the gentlest spirits into seething beasts. please, keep seeking love, even if it seems you are forbidden from it. you are the master of your own fate, I see how tired you are. the scars never healed, they twist and wrap around your entire person. your eyes are dark and lifeless, rest. but keep fighting, not with the sword you have forsaken so long ago, but with your heart. I'll be rooting for you my friend.

the rising under dog

why hello again dearie, I see you managed to help those frogs those children were kicking, hm? oh how much I can emphasize we are but the ghosts of our childhood passions. and, unsurprising enough, the hero to the trodden little creatures of the earth is now a rising golden savior to the masses. oh love, I said you'd go far, didn't I. for the good always prevail in the end, somehow, they do. you lived a difficult life, I know, but you never let that get you down. you took beatings with a grin, and dished back kindness in return. inequality and injustice made you outraged, and you strove to assist the hurting and abused. oh shining dragon, you are bathed in golden light. please keep being true. you have tasted blood and death, but you refused to force it down the throats of others. and that alone proves there is inchor in your veins, demigod. you will be struggling until the very end, battling for your comrades, your people, and yourself. never lose sight of your goal my dear. sometimes you needn't have one, except see the good, and protect it. that is all my advice can tell you. I implore, protect the goodness in yourself with everything you have, but never refuse to share it also. young hero, you are growing. you are destined for wonders even I may not live long enough to encounter. keep up the good work, and keep your head held high. you are bound to do the impossible, all because you see the truth. there is good in the world, and it deserves to be found.

[longing4yesterday]

Hello! ^^ Obligatory cat picture:

(Jackie sleeps with her eyes open and she always looks terribly panicked)

Ok now emotional support ringo panty shot:

Ok now some things that I'd actually been meaning to send into your inbox but keep forgetting to:

-taking off shipping vision and putting on the tinfoil hat, how real do you in your heart believe mclennon or any other ship of your choice were real? Doesn't need to go with evidence- just your most trutherlike attitude

-beatles album ranking?

Omg also I saw you were getting into the monkees... how are they treating youu I've been meaning to get into them for ages but somehow have not taken a single step towards it.

Ok thatis alll... hope it's not too much and hope you feel better !!! Muchmuchlove

hiii leo!!! first of all, thank you for the cat picture!! jackie looks adorable ; ; lovely little baby. and also thank you for the emotional support ringo panty shot. beautiful, 10/10 <3

secondly, to answer your questions;

in terms of if mclennon really happened, i can see it but not to the extent that we envision in fics. there was certainly a mutual attraction to one another, that much we can establish. but there’s no real way they could’ve made it work. at least, not how they were going about it. i don’t believe in the “they fucked in india and fell apart after that” theory, it feels shallow and one note. most likely, if anything happened, it came in spurts over the years. we have evidence of paul saving a letter that aunt mimi left for john saying she was heading into town for an hour or so, which is interesting. why save it? unless…either way, the love was there, but the love wasn’t enough to keep their bond completely together. maybe if john lived things would’ve been different but idk.

for albums, i will leave off yellow submarine and let it be cause i haven’t listened to either. but my official rankings goes as such; magical mystery tour, the white album, abbey road, a hard days night, sgt. peppers, revolver, rubber soul, beatles for sale, with the beatles, help! and please, please me. i need to relisten to quite a few of these but that’s my list for now <3 the first three are on heavy rotation all the time on my way to work.

and finally, the monkees! i love these silly guys so far!!! tbh i’m more interested in the lore than the music, but it’s growing on me too. i often have papa gene’s blues stuck in my head cause i am a sucker for southern inspired music. i need to get back to the show cause i was having so much fun. micky’s a stick out for me, but so is mike. i’m also a bit sold on them as a ship cause oh man, the things i’ve seen so far. either way i’m enjoying stay! glad i watched head forever ago and got sucked in the spiral <3

thank you for the ask leo, i always appreciate your presence <333

[wave2tyun]

welcome bacck ^3^

i'm glad that you're healing, and i believe greatly that you deserve it. you worked so hard getting out fics and even just responding to asks, and i'm so glad that the world is treating you the way you deserve. even if your life isn't the best, or there's still struggles, we're so proud of you.

i have to ask because i couldn't find any reblogs of the work, (T0T) but do you still have the cooking club student!yn x chef(?)!taehyun? i'm not sure how explain it, but i remember the tenderness and affection between the two and it was forever something i looked back on. even now, i look back on it. but i saw a reblog of your masterlist and only game over + rain and vanilla lattes were there so i was so sad T0T your works have helped me so much, so even reading the reblogs of those two helped

but the fic 'm talking about ended in the two drinking and taehyun kissing yn while tasting the cherry wine on her tongue? i hope that's a good enough explanation for you to know what i'm talking about 😭

i just woke up not that long ago and you're genuinely making me tear up oml thank you so so much, i wish i could give you a hug :(((((((💖💓💓💖💞💖💘 i was a bit nervous to come back on here, but i've realised it's a decision that i really shouldn't regret. even if the healing process isn't linear, i know it's all gonna be okay in the end, especially after getting stronger and being with you guys by my side☹️💞 thank you from the bottom of my heart!!!🫂🫂🩷🩷🩷

OMG "cherry wine" yes i still do have the fic!!! it's one of my all time favorites that i've written (every day i'm yearning for an encounter like that) and hearing you talk about it with so much adoration makes my heart feel so warm!!!😭😭🩷 i'm pretty sure i still have all my fics saved, the only thing i might be missing from them is probably the summaries but the story themselves + the pics are all on my laptop :0 the only exceptions might be the 2 timestamp posts that i wrote for kai's and gyu's bdays, because i think i wrote those directly on tumblr :( if there's anything else you'd like to see again please feel free to send another ask, i'll probably work on a masterlist soon :D<3 i'm so glad to hear my works have been able to help you, it reminds me again why i started to love writing in the first place, and it motivates me to not give up and try again :(💞💞

[fallencrowns]

Oh, his own arrogance still very much lingered. It was why he refused to participate in any of these modern wars he saw as squabbles. It would grant untold power to whichever side he chose with not even Salazar knowing the full extent any longer. He’d adored the attention he had received, even now when people included him on the list of the greatest of their kind regardless if it was bitterly or not.  But back then, it hadn't been so that he could become more powerful or to shift the world to his own liking.

No, the utmost importance had been to PROTECT the weak and to teach them but the second most? That he wouldn't be some noble wizard's son or that he would forever be known as his father's child. He created his own name, erasing his father's entirely so that went people would trace their bloodlines, it would end with him. One of the greatest wizards.

But he couldn't speak of that here. He had to remain the unassuming, the wizard that would HIDE his talents rather than boast of them or revel in another's awe. The attention was no longer important, he had gained that long ago and he had left it behind. Perhaps one day he could rise again but that would not be for some time. The world had never been the ACCEPTING type to any sort of change and many would think his ideology mad. Albus certainly would and had voiced his displeasure but accepted Salazar's not-so-quiet RESENTMENT of Muggles. It was a topic to avoid rather than debate lest they fall into another argument.

❝  Well, it's not so grand being on the other end. My father believed I was quite a FAILURE since he never knew my true potential either. I'm sure he'd scoff at the idea of me being a simple professor if he could see me now. ❞  A partial truth; his father had never really known what Salazar was capable of as he had been quick to abandon his home once he came of age. Leaving behind his fortune to seek his own, he wondered if his father had at least HEARD of his success in creating a school for their kind and revered for his power. ❝  Whether we show our powers or hide them, there's always someone in the world that will be disappointed. You could have the strength of a god and someone will still think you too weak or expect more. As much of a charmer as I am and try to keep to people's good sides, I've long since stopped caring what others think. I only use them to my own advantage. ❞  

Maybe that came across as rather cold and calloused, how little he thought of others and wouldn't hesitate to use them but not once had he pretended to be a 'good man' to Albus. In fact, he had often WARNED him of the opposite despite how the other would protest such a statement. What others thought was only important if he needed something. Within the school, it was so that he could blend in and no one would think him up to anything. How could the charming and polite professor be up to anything that others might consider NEFARIOUS or be a thousand year old dark wizard? Likewise with politicians and powerful allies, he might have need of them one day so best to stay on their good side.

There was no need to USE Albus. If he wanted to, he would have done so already. The soft spot towards himself was evident and rather tender. But he didn't push the man towards anything save for opening up a bit further here and there, one such attempt leading to both wizards becoming rather hotheaded. Not everyone was so usable or so disposable but surely that didn't need to be said. The most he had done was offer assistance rather than pushing Albus to any of his personal desires. Let him accomplish his own goals rather than anything else.

Maybe the polite thing would be to look away and allow the other man to compose himself. Had it been their first few encounters, Salazar would have done as much but they were well beyond that. He had probably been even more FLUSTERED when they had finally spoken in depth of their—— attraction to one another so most formal manners had been pushed to the wayside for now. Instead he let out a chuckle at Albus' attempts to hide rather than give him any sort of grace. Surely he knew just what he was walking into in this relationship.

Perhaps over time, he would grow accustomed to it and not be such a 'mess' as the wizard at his side might put it. Salazar would dread that day when a simple tease WOULDN'T cause his face to turn as red as the Gryffindor banners. The finest pleasure came from seeing the emotions on his face considering Salazar was so subdued, maybe not even capable of being caught off guard after so long.

The thought was an amusing one of having one of the greatest wizards so weak. He took a breath, resisting the urge to make perhaps a far worse comment than what did leave his lips, ❝  Well, I certainly wouldn't be OPPOSED to both happening simply on the appropriate times. If anything, it might get you to relax more. ❞  A subtle tease; he was capable of far worse but he'd go easy on the poor professor for now. It was still only the first day in their trip.

❝  Besides, in our sparring, you've no need to HOLD BACK even if you're flustered or feeling such attraction. Rest assured, I can endure far more than even Grindelwald. I'm not merely boasting, just stating FACTS. ❞  

He doubted he'd see a complete full display of what he was capable of though. There would always be that hesitation to kill, one he had experienced centuries ago and never again since then. It was merely an INSTINCT when facing against someone you held dear and those ties did not disappear so quickly. As fascinating as the idea was of seeing the greatest power from Albus, it was not likely. Even if he did reveal his immortality, the far more mortal instinct would still linger even if he was immune to something as powerful as the Killing Curse. A true tragedy and yet one he was glad for. There weren't many in the world so opposed to killing when necessary. It showed just how much of a RARITY the man was when compared to the rest of society. Despite how many that might claim to be good-hearted, the final moments were all that really mattered to weigh one's heart. How they'd react in a life-or-death situation which was certainly what Albus would face.

On the topic of the journals and documents he had, well, MOST had a fascination with the founders and so much had gotten history wrong. Particularly HIS story. While Godric didn't put it the best in his writings, the idea was there: that he'd sought to further separate the world to PROTECT their kind rather than just simply blood status. The world wouldn't be wrong in calling him a pureblood supremacist but it wasn't his sole reason, he could never be so petty. He would have to watch as Albus delved into his own history by the written accounts of others, see if his views changed any. Not on the politics but on Salazar Slytherin himself, not that Albus had ever talked so lowly of him as others often did.

The times had been different, far greater things at stake. Their numbers had been DECIMATED by the witch hunts and Salazar believed a good reason why now Halfbloods were such a necessity. They couldn't hold onto pureblood forever with their numbers so low compared to what they once were, not without facing extinction of their kind or many side effects due to incestual activites. Every day had been life or death, a constant battle for survival and many actual battles fought to just SURVIVE. It had been a different time, a reason Salazar had relaxed so much as he grew older and saw the times change.

It didn't mean he had to care for Muggles or Muggleborns still due to what they caused.

❝  Well, I don't have much on Slytherin despite my obvious preference towards him, but I can certainly lead you to writings that account for my own theories about the man. Or simply answer any questions you have based on writings as not all of it's in my collection. Some were far too fragile to gather or were destroyed when I tried to collect them. ❞  

He was about to turn to lead the way when he felt the warm hand grasp his own and cause him to pause. His eyes moved downwards, brows furrowed as now Albus was the one to make the first move before relaxing with lips giving a gentle tug upwards back into that soft smile. Green eyes trailed up the arm to that beautiful face. Now this was something he could certainly get used to. A gentleness he hadn't really been exposed to in a number of centuries, a personal touch to every little brush. Salazar found himself giving a small and careful squeeze to the hand, almost as a silent thanks. ❝  Come with me then, ❞  he spoke softly before leading the other down the hallway towards the large library he kept.

Books and pages abound on the walls, some scattered or strewn about on tables. Not the most organized but well kept for his own research. It wasn't exactly often anyone else was ever given the chance to view it. ❝  The founders are mostly on the far back wall, though be careful with the shelf to the right. There's a few CURSED books among them I haven't fully broken yet. ❞  He gestured with his free hand in the direction of a few of the shelves in the expansive library. Well, he had done his best to make sure nothing was too DANGEROUS, at least nothing deadly but there was only so much one man could do.

( cont from xoxo ) || @fallencrowns

And he could understand that in his own way. There were times when the view at Hogwarts did not affect him as deeply as it used to although these days, he one could say he felt even more of an attachment to the place. He supposed it was primarily out of fear of losing his place entirely. If the Ministry wanted, they could have him removed completely from his post. That was probably the next step should he keep making excuses about fighting Gellert. However, he told himself that if they removed him from Hogwarts entirely then it would be more than enough motivation for him to become the new Minister. He'd hate to give up what little privacy he had left, but it would be worth it to make certain people's lives a living hell. He'd start with Travers who was acting particularly peculiar as of late and go down the list of those who kept making this process of dealing with Gellert difficult.

"I can relate. Sometimes Hogwarts doesn't hit the way that it used to, but… after the incident with the Ministry, I think I have found myself feeling a bit clingy and sentimental over the place. There are still a few spots about the castle that fill me with joy. The threat of being removed from it entirely has reignited an old love for the school. The view doesn't hold a candle to this one, but I am certain I would miss it if I left for good."

Or rather was forced to leave for good. Should Albus ever find himself in a place where something other than Hogwarts consumed him completely, maybe it wouldn't feel so bad --- the idea of leaving it behind. But with his family life in shams and his personal life still filled with many questions, he couldn't imagine leaving the only permanent, sure thing in his life right now. That stability was much needed at this juncture in his life.

They both stood in silence for a spell, each of them consumed by their own thoughts. Albus was not one for prying too much so while curious, he knew Corvinus had his own reasons for retreating here --- and not just because it was his ancestorial home. Albus knew bits and pieces, but it wasn't his place to keep digging. After all, he too had his fair share of personal demons he wasn't quite able to place into words for sharing. Either way, he knew this place and this view held a different kind of comfort for them both, but it was still nice to have someone to share such a moment. It only added to the growing ease he felt for a change.

"I did not know any better. When you are young and discover your talents for whatever they might be, there's an arrogance inside of you that makes you feel invincible. I think… I enjoyed the attention for a while. It was truly nice being recognized as a great wizard. I had worked so hard you see, but my vision was… distorted. I was living for the moment with little regard as to how it might affect my future. I was… also running away from the routine at home. I wanted… something more."

That something wasn't JUST Gellert and the bravery to love him out in the open. It was… freedom. And it was very selfish of him too. He knew that regardless of how hard he worked to change the world, Aberforth was never going to forgive him for being a selfish bastard. It was Albus who allowed Gellert to believe his own hype; who loved him despite the red flags he overlooked. And maybe he would NEVER deserve Aberforth's forgiveness; goodness he knew Ariana's death was not something he could just go back in time and fix. He just missed the companionship; the feeling of family. It was lonely out here in the world --- cold and unforgiving. It was one thing for strangers to ignore him but another thing entirely for his brother to pretend he didn't even exist anymore.

His own peaceful expression faltered briefly into one reminiscent of despair yet just as quickly he resumed the mask. The words of his partner broke through the despairing musings causing him to turn and look, biting back a bashful smile. Corvinus' words took him back to the very first time a bit of banter broke out between them. The professor's words were just as effective then as they were now. It still amazed Albus how he managed to be so oblivious to the man's interest. He thought… Well, he wasn't entirely certain anymore what he thought of the banter. Harmless fun maybe? In any event, he couldn't have been more wrong and finally had the kiss to prove it.

"I… I do not blush!" he protested, although even as he said the words he found himself having to break eye contact briefly. The smile Corvinus tore from him had cheeks hurting. So long has it been since anyone was able to pull such a smile from him yet Corvinus did so with little trouble. His charm was just too much. "This other view lives to torment me. I certainly hope he goes easy on me in the coming days or I fear I may not be long for this world. I would hope he'd have me at my best for sparring rather than a weakened puddle of water at his feet."

Because the idea of sparring Corvinus gave him two minds. On one hand, it was going to be a little strange trying to seriously duel someone he was growing ever so fond of. The temptation, at least on Albus' end, to hold back would be there and that would do him no good. Furthermore, it was far easier to duel a friend when emotions were involved. He wasn't angry with Corvinus nor did he wish to be. And he knew this was the heart of the issue with dueling Gellert too. The temptation to hold back would surely be at the forefront of his mind because it was unlike Albus to hurt anyone. Despite all of the killing Gellert had done, Albus had no knowledge of ever killing anyone. That is to say, IF he had killed someone in the past then that person was his sister and it was the not knowing for certain part that had him petrified of pushing himself anymore.

Ah, but he needed to calm his mind. His anxiety was building all over again and he certainly didn't need that right now. He was here now and while able, he wished to enjoy the serenity before reality set in again.

Blue eyes looked to his companion and after a moment he nodded. While it was true that he would not have minded standing here for a few moments more, there was still much to see here. "I would love to see the library and yes, I've always been rather fascinated with the Founders. I think anyone who truly cares about Hogwarts should at least be a little curious about them. After all, there have been many stories told over the years, but we know how word of mouth can be. The more people pass a story along, the more fabricated the stories become. I think it would be interesting to read everyone's first accounts of Hogwarts and truly delve into how they wished to mold their ideal students."

Albus found himself chuckling softly. "I think Helga had the right idea. I simply can't imagine having to pen my life and thoughts for the world to see someday. If they truly knew me, I doubt they would have much good to say about me. Not that I care about being loved anymore, but… there are some things best kept close to my heart. They wouldn't understand and I've a feeling that there's more to Salazar than we've been led to believe too. He may have taken all of his things, but perhaps clues were left behind that reveal more of the picture."

There's a pause as he moves closer to Corvinus, reaching out to take his hand. "It's fine. I wouldn't expect anyone to have too much information on the two most powerful of the founders, but admittedly, I would enjoy spending time reading the accounts over time while I am here. Just for fun to sate my curiosity. Whatever you have is more than enough. It is simply an honor to be allowed to handle such delicacies in the first place. I shall hardly complain, Ophiucus."

[strangcrdoctor]

BASICS.

full name.        Stephen Vincent Strange   pronunciation.      stiɸɛn vɪntsɛnt stɹenʤ    nickname.      Houdini, Dr. Strangelove, Asshole, and a plethora of others but NEVER Steve  gender.     Cis-Male height.     6′ age.       42 approximately, exact age no longer quantifiable   zodiac.       Scorpio spoken languages.       English, French, German, Italian, Spanish, Portuguese, Russian, Greek, Latin, Hindi, Tagalog, etc. etc. etc.   

PHYSICAL CHARACTERISTICS.

hair colour.       Dark brown with persistent graying around his temples eye colour.       Blue-green skin tone.      Pale due to time spent indoors, but olive toned    body type.      Long and lean but muscular - his strength is packed so he’s more lithe than bulky accent.       American in standard conversation, but speaks with less accent than expected in other languages dominant hand.      Due to the nature of his injuries Stephen has to be ambidextrous to compensate, though he was formerly right-handed, and his left hand is persistently weaker than his right due to more severe injury posture.      Stephen’s posture oscillates depending on what company he’s in - if he’s with people he doesn’t know his posture is straight to the point of stiff and distancing, where if he’s with people he knows and likes, his posture is loose and playful  tattoos.      Some of a more arcane nature since becoming a sorcerer to help with personal defense most noticeable feature.     His eyes are a relatively easily identifiable feature, but his bearing is what people tend to notice most

CHILDHOOD.

place of birth.     Philadelphia Hospital, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania     hometown.         Plattsmouth, Nebraska birth weight.           7 lbs 1 oz     birth height.           22 in  manner of birth.           Natural, with the assistance of a midwife first words.         “Wecord” and “elephant” siblings.      Donna Strange and Victor Strange (both deceased)  parents.     Beverly Strange and Eugene Strange (both deceased)  parental involvement.          Because of the demands of running a farm, Stephen didn’t have an overly close relationship with his father, but what relationship they did have was amicable. Stephen’s intense work ethic heralded from both his father’s influence and his mother’s brilliance. He was considerably closer to his mother, and much of his taste in music and literature stems from her. Life was hard, scant, and boring in rural Nebraska, but Stephen used the mundanity to spur him into bigger academic pursuits, and his parents respected and encouraged it inasmuch as they could, given neither of them believed Stephen would take on the farm. When Donna passed away, however, relationships in the family became exceedingly strained, and when Beverly passed away from grief after also losing Victor, Stephen and Eugene became functionally estranged until Eugene’s death while Stephen was at Columbia. Though his childhood was relatively good, the abrupt and painful end to it keeps Stephen from speaking of it to all but his closest friends, and even then under reluctance and duress    

ADULT LIFE.

occupation.   Former head of Neurosurgery and neurological research at Metro General Hospital, New York City, New York. Current Master of the New York Sanctum and Sorcerer Supreme current residence.         177A Bleecker Street, Greenwich Village, New York     close friends.        Christine Palmer, MD; Wong; Billy Cohen, MD; Jeri Hogarth, JD      relationship status.        Single financial status.         Once he was declared dead by the state, Stephen’s previous locked assets were disbursed according to the terms in his living will, and all of his accounts were closed. Stephen therefore lives from what food is grown in the Sanctums and Kamar Taj, and gets by doing odd jobs around New York City. In essence - he’s flat broke driver’s license.       Stephen held a driver’s license for most of his life, but purposefully let it lapse while he was “missing.” He has no intention of ever driving again criminal record.        Aside from a few speeding tickets from when he was a teenager in Nebraska and a parking ticket or two in NYC, none “vices.”       His primary vices are work, casual sex, and alcohol. During the year he spent in-between surgeries he became highly dependent on painkillers, and much of his early days at Kamar Taj were spent detoxing. He’s now exceedingly sensitive to what medication he allows himself to take, even if it means his chronic pain is worse than it needs to be   

SEX & ROMANCE.

sexual orientation.       Bisexual  romantic orientation.       Biromantic  preferred emotional role.   submissive  |  dominant  | switch  |  unknown preferred sexual role.   submissive  |  dominant  |  switch  |  sex repulsed libido.       Stephen’s libido isn’t necessarily more active than average for his age, but he’s more sexually active than some because he utilizes sex as a physical and emotional stress reliever. So he’s decently sexually active, but not necessarily because he’s hard-wired that way   turn on’s.       Intelligence, sass, handsy people    turn off’s.        Degradation, hard-core BDSM, watersports/scatplay     love language.        Turns out that Stephen’s love language is touch, which sucks for him because he’s bad at getting himself the physical contact he really needs and appreciates. It is, however, probably one of the reasons why he compensates for a lack of casual consistent touch with casual sexual encounters    relationship tendencies.       Stephen’s dating record is far from stellar, particularly because in his days a surgeon, his career came before everything else in his life. He was well-known for prioritizing research over romance, and so his few relationships didn’t last very long. Christine was the longest relationship he ever had, and the only person he remained friends with afterward. Since becoming a sorcerer, he sees his situation as not really allowing relationships to be an option, where before he had a choice and just chose to neglect relationship. Yet another reason why he dabbles in casual sex is because he fears for those who get close to him now that his life has become considerably more of a danger

MISCELLANEOUS.

character’s theme song.        1000 Years by Sting hobbies to pass the time.          Most of Stephen’s hobbies are now directly related to his work, but he still considers reading and researching to be recreation compared to most of his other duties. He has, however, now that he has an arboretum in the Sanctum, taken up gardening as a secondary leisure activity   mental illnesses.          Stephen has severe PTSD both from his car accident and his experiences with the Dark Dimension and the Time Stone, as well as immense anxiety problems   physical illness.         Stephen’s hands are chronically weak, with nerve damage and numbness making fine motor skills difficult, but he also suffers from dietary restrictions brought on by his magic use    left or right brained.        Right brained     fears.         Naturally Stephen has a very strict fear of being in vehicles, but he also has triggers related to darkness, closed spaces, and being restrained, many of which stem from deaths he experienced with Dormammu. One of Stephen’s primary fears, however, is that he will lose grip on his own reality and lose his way due to the conflation of realities he witnessed through the Time Stone self confidence level.          Stephen’s manner of self-confidence has changed from his time as a surgeon, and is more of a facade than it was previously. Now, Stephen again maintains a cold, seemingly arrogant exterior around people he’s not close to, though his confidence in his abilities isn’t false. Personally, however, he does struggle with fears of inferiority or incapability in reference to what his position really needs of him. He’ll always be confident enough to try on behalf of his position, but that doesn’t always indicate he believes he’ll succeed    vulnerabilities.      Isolation is Stephen’s biggest vulnerability. Though he does have a few close friends that can be used against him, if one wanted to really get at him, it isn’t as difficult as one might assume because he’s alone so much of the time. He also internalizes much of his emotional trauma, and so doesn’t have the emotional support structures to catch when things go wrong with him   

tagged by stolen from.  @sevenbulletsavior tagging. whoever else wants to steal it!

[wineonmytshirt]

HI JEN 💓💝💘💕💓💞💗💕💓💝💘

first and foremost, HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! 💌💌💌 i hope this new year brings nothing but love, happinness, and lots of success and growth for you and your loved ones! 💝 how are you doing today? :)

i saw your post about not being around, i'm sorry about the passing of your relative; my condolences to you and the rest of your family.

i agree with what you said so much! taylor has such a talent for storytelling; it's truly amazing the way she transports you to the scenery she's describing when she sings 🤯🤯🤯 although not colour, but the way she makes snow on the beach sound exactly like that... mindblowing!

ohhhh, i'm surprised to see we share some likings! i'm more of a casual fan (i don't really follow them so i have noo idea what they're up to, however, i enjoy their music a lot!), but halsey is very good! i used to listen to them obsessively back when badlands came out; it's like one of those things that etch into your brain forever. i loveeee haunting, control, castle, and strange love! i listened to if i can't have love i want power last year and i enjoyed it a lot too, although i haven't really listened to it more, i found it to be an amazing album as well (i am not a woman, i'm a god is such a bop).

fall out boy are also amazing!! save rock and roll is like one of my favourite albums EVER, and american beauty/american psycho also is one of my faves to listen to! if you said they have new music coming, i hope i don't miss it :) ariana too!! ugh, i adore her music; dangerous woman is also one of my favourites and she's just so!! i do realise i am quite disconnected from mainstream media lately, but before the pandemic i was head over heels with these artists! demi lovato is also incredible! i love their voice (i am not sure at this point how they identify, so i apologise if i'm misgendering them); truly a wonder to witness 👀 although i think they put a rock album lately? i heard one song and i want to listen to it skjndshfb

i was a big fan of 5SOS back in high school too, although some things happened and i kinda just ignore them now 🫥🫥 (nothing personal, they just remind me of someone) but i've seen they've gotten big and that makes me happy for them cause they were really good and their albums (the first two) were on my playlist every day!

OH I ALMOST FORGOT EMAILS I CAN'T SEND!! like every artist i mentioned before, i used to listen to sabrina a lot years ago, but i drifted away. however, recently (and due to @/into my melancholia [i hope this doesn't give away my identity 🫥]) i listened to emails i can't send and LOVED it! 💓💓💓 it's such a good album too, i've been obsessed with nonsense and read your mind.

as for mirrorball, it's one of taylor's best writing, however sad, but i can also relate to it

ohhhhh, i've read some stephen king's books (and loved them!) but i haven't read doctor sleep; i might check it out 👀 my favourite drink is coffee, i don't drink much alcohol but i love wine! fun fact: my first language is spanish! so if there's any grammar or spelling mistakes in here, i apologise hehe

full offense but bailey is the cutest and i love him 🥺🥺🥺

i know this was quite a long ask (again), but i hope you don't mind :( i wanted to gush about things too! i know soon we'll unveil our gifts and to be honest, i'm kinda insecure about mine because i feel it's not a big deal :( despite that, i hope you'll like it, and i hope you don't regret me being your secret santa. just know that i loved meeting you and learning about you and you're so nice and kind that i'm thankful this site has people like you that make it a safe place 💗💗💗

i hope you're having a lovely day, please take care of yourself! 💞💞💞💞

-🎅

HI SANTA SWIFTIE!!!!!!!!!! HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!

first and most important thing i have to say in response to this is that i am so excited to see my gift and it is a big deal to me bc you made it for me and put thought into it sooo let's be real i love it already!!!!!!! you've been so sweet and wonderful to talk to, thank you for your kindness, i appreciate you more than i could ever say💕💕

thank you for your kind words for my family, i really, really appreciate that. it's a weird time, but we'll be okay.

CONTROL CASTLE AND STRANGE LOVE?? could your taste get any better? you're an icon. i've tried to see halsey twice and it hasn't worked out yet... the day it happens... idek who i'll become.

FALL OU TBOY!!!! SAVE ROCK AND ROLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THAT ENTIRE ALBUMMMMMM JKSJKDSGJK . save rock and roll feat. elton john? bye. just one yesterday? incredible. miss missing you? AMAZING. young volcanoes? heard it live and nearly passed out.

i love fall out boy.

Z!!!!!! Z!!!!!! @intomymelancholia YOUR INFLUENCE CREATED ANOTHER SABRINA FAN!!!!!!!! I Love it.

if you love wine you should try the fruity kind i like! that might sound weird, but barefoot fruitscato, if you can get it... yummm!!!

Bailey loves you. xo

and so do I.

[shadowturtlesstuff]

You belong with me

so i decided to post wadsworth first. modern au cressworth- you belong with me taylor swift

Thomas throws his phone down on the bed with frustration swirling around him as he paces. I set down my pen and wait till he turns and spots me. We often find ourselves talking via paper throughout the nights, from questions about our day to helping each other study. It is also often we watch each other be angry at something, yet I've not seen him this bad before. Finally Thomas turns and catches my eye. He stands there for a second before smiling and I quickly move around my various workbooks till I find my notebook I use to talk to him. I take my sharpie and write: ‘Are you okay?’

I watch him shake his head ever so slightly, seemingly baffled at it, but he walks to his window and opens it. The wind brushes his deep brown hair and I can't help but want to reach out and run my hand through it. I curse myself for it as he motions for me to open my window. Moving my books and pens off of me and cursing at my stiff leg as I go and open the window. Somehow I manage to hit my arm in the process and I curse, which makes Thomas laugh slightly so I forgive my body for hurting me. 

“You have a wicked mouth Wadsworth. Did you not learn cursing is unlady-like?” he teases and I relax slightly because of it.

“Fuck you,” I scowl at his smirk and the frigid wind. His eyes light up at my temper. We live across from one another, if we were to reach out we could hold hands. Which we have done. When I got rejected from the specific school I was desperate to go to, Thomas had managed to climb into my room and hold me as I cried. He's only ever needed to climb over twice to cheer me up, the other times have been to study or watch some romance programme he thought was good. I hoped wherever was troubling was something that wouldn't resort to me having to climb over. As much as I would want to, my brain may have a hard time letting me attempt it. 

“I assume dear Wadworth, you want to ask what has made me so irate?” he asks, eyes focused on behind me and fingers tapping his window sill as he sits. I watch as his cat, ridiculously named Sir Isaac Mewton, jumps off his bed and onto his seat next to him. He grabs the cat and kisses the top of his head before holding him in his lap.

“Perhaps,” I say, moving so I rest my head on the wall, “perhaps I merely wanted to ask if Sir Issac was okay.” his eyes shift to mine and despite him still being angry they soften at my attempt at humour. I am not as good as Thomas at using humour to help someone, but he always does it for me. 

“Really? You always refer to him as a little pest, whereas as with me, I am your dearest person, of course you want to know how I am feeling. My son is good though, very energetic today.” he smiles down at his cat. I remember the day he brought him home, he made me go over to his house and we spent all night playing with him. Thomas did, I ended up studying and making notes for the both of us while he gave Sir Isaac a ‘grand tour’ of his new home. The smile vanishes off Thomas's face and once again his gaze goes past me. “I assume you saw the call, well that was William. Yes, awful. Apparently though, there is a rumour that I'm with Miss Whitehall. I don't even remember her first name, but he was convinced of our relation despite my protests. Madness.” I watch him scoff, anger once again taking over his features. His cat nuzzles into him and Thomas leans into his cat. If I wasn't also mad now I'd smile at the sight. 

“Is this the same William that had convinced everyone I was dating him?” 

“Yes.”

“Bitch. Why on earth is he such a problem? Where on earth does he even make this assumptions about us?'' I find myself standing and pacing, trying to quell my own rising anger. A year ago, William had been my lab partner for a few weeks, he was friendly, but people had got it in their head that we were somehow together, and he went with it. Gossiped about me, even Thomas, and then was somehow enraged I dared to stop those rumours and be angry at him. I'd come home one day when it was particularly too much, when my father had found out and lectured me about it, as though I was in the wrong for standing up for myself. He'd cancel my lesson with my uncle out of spite, and I stormed upstairs. Thomas had been at the window, as if he was expecting me. One look at his face made me cry. I managed to open my window and he'd once again climbed in and held me as I cried. Then he made us watch this awful romance film together and held me still as I fell asleep on him. 

“I have never once,” Thomas says, dragging me back from those awful memories, “shown interest in her, nor will I ever.” He drags a hand through his hair. “She's just- a lot.”

I huff a sigh. She is awful. Had been awful to Liza and I for years. With her short skirts, high heels and the most rotten attitude I have ever witnessed. It wasn't often that I'd hate someone like that, someone so different from me in nearly every way, but she has tried to make me feel that I don't belong because of my interest in science and not the traditional girl interests.. “That is the understatement of the year Cresswell. Beside, you wouldn't work, she's too- your,” I have no idea how to explain how excellent Thomas is, how wonderful his mind is and how kind he is. It's not a side he shows to most, yet if he was ever with someone like Whitehall, it would be disastrous. I take my seat again and find him looking at me, suppressing a smirk and raising an eyebrow at me. “What?” I ask. I shrink under his gaze, pulling my hoodie over my legs as I curl in on myself. 

“I’m what? I'd be delighted to know your innermost thoughts of me, Wadsworth.”

“Your absurd but fine I'll elaborate,” I roll my eyes as he shifts so he is fully facing me, eyes completely focused, no sign of the anger he had only moments ago, “your too kind, too witty and clever and Whitehall wouldn’t appreciate you enough. You-” don’t belong with her.

Ever since he mentioned the idea of being with someone else, real or not, I have tried to ignore how much it pained me that he would be with someone else. I never expected to want to be with him, yet lately the premise of dating him has seemed very pleasing to me.

“You forgot to mention how handsome I look, or how charming I am, but I'll take it,” his voice is deeper than normal and his gaze travels over me even though his eyes are on my own. Thomas pats Sir Issac and his cat jumps off behind him with a whine. His hand reaches out for mine and I lean forward, wind making my loose strands of hair fly across my face. His hands are warm as I take them but his smile warms me more. It is small but genuine and filled with the normal Cresswell charm mixed with something I can't quite name. 

“I don’t need to inflate your ego further Thomas.” 

“I know but it would've been nice. I did say the inner most thoughts but we’ll get there. Audrey rose-” he looks down contemplating his words before he once again locks his gaze on mine, his dark brown eyes bright, “I dont belong with her, your right, my heart would never belong to her especially since it already belongs to someone else.” 

I blink at the honesty. I want to scream that you belong with me; but if Thomas is in love with someone else then I suppose I will have to find a way to deal with it. I try to keep the hurt of my face even as he smiles at me. 

“I-” Thomas lets go of my hand and stands. There's a silence between us until he motions for me to move. The idiot is going to climb into my house so he can tell me about his new found love. Like the fool I am, I'm going to let him talk about this girl who makes him look this happy. Even though it hurts that it's not me who is making him look like that. Even though I'm the one who makes him laugh when he is angry or upset. Even though I'm the one who knows his favourite songs, the books beside his bed and all his hopes and dreams.

He climbs over and sets himself on the window sill, giving me room to sit across from him. I do, even as I try to ignore the weight pressing down on my chest. “I hope you are happy with whomever has your heart Cresswell.” I say and mean it. I once again curl into myself, hoodie covering my legs as i watch him continue to smile at me, 

“Of course I'll be happy. She's amazing. Let me tell you all about her. I met her many years back and was instantly smitten with her emerald eyes and her quick witted mind. How she sings to herself every morning and how her dark curls fall across her face whenever she sits on her bed and reads. I adore her curiosity for the dead and how wicked her mouth is and how delightful it is to watch your mind at work. I love when she shows me a note through the window to see if I'm doing okay and-”

“Wait,” I blurt out, my mind catching up, “Thomas, are you talking about me?”

“Yes, finally! I thought I'd have to keep speaking forever till you realized it was you.” He starts laughing at my gaping mouth until I collect myself enough to scowl at him slightly for laughing. Thomas reaches out for my hand, moving closer to me until my back is pressed against the wall, my hoodie no longer over my legs as he rests his other hand on my leg, warmth seeping through me. “Wadsworth, darling, I have been in love with you for some time now.” 

Silence washes over us as we stare, trying to convince ourselves this is really happening. “I have something to show you.” My voice is barely about a whisper and I slide out of his grasp even though I don't want to. I walk to my bed where all my notebooks were left open and my notebooks sits. I open it out and let a piece of paper fall out. Facing Thomas I open the sheet slowly, watch him read the words. His eyes lit up at them.

I love you.

I take my place beside him again, his hands finding their way in mine once again. “I wrote that the night after you came here the second time. Something in me clicked that no matter what you'd find a way to comfort me. Not save me, but work alongside me. I wanted to tell you I just couldn't face it. But I needed to acknowledge it. So I wrote it down, and I look at it every time we use the note system; I try to convince myself to show you.” Thomas just stares at me, eyes flicking down to my lips every now and then. His hands are making circles on my leg, not entirely intentional. Thomas has always shown if he is excited or nervous by either tapping or making shapes on surfaces. The world slows completely as he leans in and presses his lips against mine. He pulls back ever so slightly, resting his head against mine and we are both smiling wildly at each other, pressing kisses until he leans further away. Thomas goes back to his side of the wall, which may as well be across the other side of the world, then he pulls me to him and I twist so that my back is against his. He holds me as we both look out the window, enjoying the freeing feeling of telling each other how we feel. 

“Now would be a perfect time to tell me how handsome I am, my love.” 

@fangirling-again @kittycat2187 @goatahoan @city-of-fae @the-hoofflepooff @padfoot-sirius-black-blog @purplecreatorhorsewagon @boredbookwormgirl @goddess-of-writing-wars @lovecakeandmore ​ @yikesitsmaddie @loveyatopluto​ @throneofsc @bookscressworth​

[everafterkeiji]

Song: Hiccup by Valley

Summary: After encountering a road block in your relationship, what path will you take to wind up your broken heart with Iwaizumi?

Pairings: Hajime Iwaizumi x fem!reader

Genre/Warning: angst, cursing

Word count: 6k

A/N: i promise myself i was going to write some bokuto fluff but this song keeps bringing me back to iwa😣 also pls listen to this song<3

2 YEARS AGO

"Tooru."

You call out to him, knees to the floor clutching tightly on your shirt, droplets to the wooden surface. Oikawa harshly closes his eyes, unable to let his eyes rest on your weakened state. He takes a deep breath when he hears your mournful sob. He hears how you took in rough gasps of air so he drops the box from his hands as he rushes to you, his knee scraping from sliding to the floor as he takes you in his chest as you sobbed even more. Oikawa allowing his own tears to fall on your clothes.

He consistently caresses your hair, as your sniffles and cries of pain covered the eary atmosphere of your apartment.

"Tooru." You call out again, he closes his eyes as he leans his head on yours. He dreaded every second that passed knowing he shouldn't be the one to comfort you, but he knew your savior wasn't going to rescue you this time.

"Do you think he'll miss me?"

"I know he will, darling." He assures you, and you wipe your eyes gasping for air once again before speaking again. He lets his hand slide down to your back, patting it every now and then.

"But there's someone better huh?"

Oikawa bites his lip, and you take this silence as an answer you'd never forget. Your lips tug upwards, grinning at how it stung when it came from Oikawa. To Tooru, no one could replace you. He couldn't envision someone to love his brother the way you did and no amount of pain can top how much you cherished each other but he couldn't answer because he was unsure of the motives of the past ace.

"Thank you for staying." You whisper and he pulled you closer as he sighs, glancing at the apartment that appeared in their late night video calls. The same room where he saw the brightest smile that was painted on Iwaizumi, the eyes that carried passion whenever you'd pop up. Visiting the apartment for the first time, he didn't expect how- lifeless it felt.

"Always."

PRESENT

You stretched as you rolled over to the side, used to the ghost of him. You shouldn't be used to it, he should be there to occupy it everyday but every morning you were just greeted by the chilliness he brought you.

The sun sneakily shined upon your eyes as you immediately turn away, expecting the memories to strike your heart like it does whenever the sun flaunted its rays.

"You're mesmerizing." He whispers, his pointer finger inched its way down to your cheek, smiling to himself. You hummed in response, shuffling in the sheets as his heart pounders at the sight of your shoulder peeking through the thin material, with the sunlight decorating your skin with its beauty.

You opened your eyes only to be surprised by how bright the sun was making you close them immediately, giggling to yourself. Who knew his heart could melt even more? Once you've slowly opened your eyes again, you gaze at your Hajime placing a hand on his cheek. With his hand on your chin, he slowly lifts it so your lips meet with his as you smile, running your hand from his cheek to his hair, while closing your eyes at the

He pulls away as butterflies swarmed inside him, pushing back the string of hair that landed in your eyes.

"I love you."

"Forever?"

"And ever after."

You curse at the usual memory that would pass you every morning. It annoyed you how there wasn't a day where you weren't starting the morning this pissed off. Realistically speaking, you adored how your memories would bring life to your body once in a while but when love appears, pain tags along- making it hard to enjoy the only things that could take away the emptiness.

Without him, you could never bring yourself to close the curtains. A habit you've devastatingly brought upon yourself.

Whenever the sun rose and it's light surrounded your room, it was the closest embrace you could ever have from him.

You let your fingers graze over the longing sensation on your lips. Incapable of forgetting how every kiss from his plush lips made you high. Intoxicated with his devotion to you. Each having it's own unique way of bringing you stories from the way it synced with yours.

Do you ever think about coming back to kiss my mouth? You ask yourself, sadly letting go of your lips before stepping into the bathroom.

I miss the taste of you and it's always been you. Iwaizumi thinks to himself as he feels the tingle of coldness from his lips. Like you, he adored the way his mornings were blessings but his room looked like a grave for his emotions.

Curtains closed, not allowing to let the sun peak through since the light in his world wasn't there to bring back the life in his soulless apartment.

He steps out of bed entering his bathroom, brushing his teeth as he rubs his eyes with his free hand.

"S-shush! Baby- baby stop talking!" He says chuckling before placing the toothbrush in your mouth. You two were superbly drunk and it seems like even if Iwaizumi was drunk to the gods, he was still the responsible one in the relationship. You were already about to pass out but his loud laughter kept you awake.

"But Hajime- let me sleep already, you're so noisy bub." You pout but he chuckles again. You turn behind you try and sit on top of the counter but you slid off when you jumped. Iwaizumi shakes his head with a grin as he places his hand on your waist before effortlessly lifting you and placing you on the bathroom sink.

You continue to brush your teeth as he watches how your eyes would droop every second. You spit out the toothpaste before taking in some water and spitting it out as well. You wiped your mouth before bringing your arms outward. "Am I okay now babe? Hajime- honey I wanna sleep." You beg as he rolls his eyes taking you in his arms, like a bride.

"And what about you mister? Did you brush your teeth?" You teased, taking in the aroma of alcohol he had. He bit his lips trying not to laugh but he shakes his head, answering your question. You let out a gasp of betrayal as you hopped out of his arms grabbing the toothbrush and putting toothpaste on it, but you hear his cackle making you laugh as well, addicted to how it made you join him in an instant.

"Princess, at least put it on the actual brush. Not the other end you dumbie." He states making you look down on your failure of an attempt. You let out an "Oh." and this brought tears to both of your eyes from laughing endlessly.

He gazes at his reflection through the mirror as he takes a deep breath. It felt like if he'd utter a word, his voice would already crack at the resurfaced moment. He scolds himself for having minimal change in a span of two years. He told himself that he shouldn't wallow in the grief but he endured it for days.

There wasn't a clear way for him to move on, especially when you drained him from all functions of his mind. The only thing that interests him to be happy was that he held on to the probability of meeting you again. Even if the chances were slim to none, he'd take anything that there is left just to see you again.

Though it seems like, he'd have to suffer longer just for it to happen.

-

Maybe I'd understand the things that you'd do. You whisper as you take another gulp of alcohol. It was Saturday, your supposed late night sessions with Iwaizumi but instead you were solo for today, and maybe for the rest of the years. You bitterly chuckle to yourself as you didn't bother to answer Oikawas call. Your phone kept going off, receiving dozens of messages and missed calls from the setter. He deeply hated Saturdays, or at least your version of it.

Whether you chose to bottle down every beer you had, or scream and get smothered in mascara stains from crying, or even worse, both. Sometimes you'd even mistaken Oikawa for Iwaizumi, and Oikawa allows it knowing it's a way for you to cope. He hated how far away he was but he strictly told you that if you were ever to pursue yourself to go to the club, he'd drop everything and book a ticket to you immediate, of course this was enough for you to listen especially when you'd feel guilty for wasting his time.

Oikawa knew better than to ask for Iwaizumis help. He remained a bridge for the two of you, knowing he'd encounter to different sides. Iwaizumi had him pick up his belongings in your apartment, denying to step foot in your room. In which brought Oikawa to tears at sight of his best friends past lover in such a disaster of a state. So granting Iwaizumis wish, he stayed.

"Why can't you do it? It's your apartment." Oikawa argued making Iwaizumi grunt in pain as he secretly wipes away the tears in his eyes. He sighs before facing the setter.

"She hates me, Oikawa." He says, staring directly at the boy. Oikawa scoffs but stares at the ground, hands to his side formed in a fist.

Is it that bad? He questions.

"Iwa- what happened?" He asks nervously but Iwaizumi only closes his eyes as he tries to get rid of the screams from the previous night.

"I'll tell you soon. When you see her, maybe you'll understand why I can't do this, why I can't face her. Just please do me one favor." The tone in his voice slowly lessens with the last sentence, making Oikawas heart ache for the two of you. Looking at Iwaizumis eyes, Oikawa could see the way he was holding back, but from what? There was a certain change in his usual stare- he looked lost.

Oikawa sits on the couch as he lets his hand gesture for Iwaizumi to speak. He couldn't say anything else but he hoped that Iwaizumi would take his silence as an answer already. Oikawa would do anything for Iwa, and if he was your other half, and Oikawa will do the same to you.

"Save her."

"From what, Iwa?"

"From what I've done."

Oikawa was impatiently waiting for your response but it seems you've decided to push him aside again. Although he was home, the distance from him to you was troublesome so he insisted to call you instead.

He assumed that last year you've gotten better since you spent you Saturday sleeping instead of drinking, but it progressively got worse.

"I mean, one drink wouldn't hurt right?"

He was dumbfounded when one drink turned into hundreds. He knew it was difficult to continue especially when you and Iwaizumi were having the time of your lives everytime. Whether you were extremely drunk, he knew that you two acted the complete same when you were sober. There wasn't a difference, meaning that's just how love worked between you two.

"Tooru- honey!" You shout as Iwaizumi pouts. It was your 4th anniversary and Oikawa decided to call to greet the lovely couple another successful year of your relationship.

"It's shittykawa to you, babe." Iwaizumi teases making Oikawa rolls his eyes. Through the camera, he sees you above Iwaizumi with arms wrapped around his neck without your chin resting on the boys head as he smiles, content to see that 4 years and love didn't change, not even a bit.

"Disgusting lovebirds, happy anniversary to you both!" Oikawa cheers as you giggle, blowing a kiss to him for greeting you two.

"Thank you Tooru-" your words were cut off by a gasp of realization as you shake Iwaizumi. Hajime takes in your excitement as he shakes his head at your actions.

"Hajime! There's no way you're not making Tooru as your best man- anyway! Tooru! This my official invitation for you to be his best man at our wedding!" Oikawa laughs as he raises his eyebrow to Iwaizumi who had a smirk on his lips.

"Well, I will be overly disappointed if I wasn't chosen. If Iwa-chan declines, I'll be your best man instead Y/N, or if you take my offer, I'll be the groom." He winks to you as you laugh before taking another sip of your drink. Iwaizumi flips off Oikawa and the setter only returns this by poking his tongue out to his best friend.

"So is that right, Iwa-chan? Will you finally bend the knee for the lovely lady?" With Oikawas question, you turn to Iwaizumi as if you were nervous. You bit your lip looking at your boyfriend before he pecks your lips catching you off guard as he looks at you with a smirk.

"I'd be a fool not to." He says making you squeal, as you immediately cover your face in your hands, embarassed by how red you got. Oikawa rolls his eyes, envious at the love you shared. Although, he is joyous that you've made Iwaizumi the happiest man he can be, even if you two weren't married yet, to Oikawa it looks like your relationship will only lead to the altar.

There wasn't a single doubt to that.

"Y/N! I thought you've forgotten how to pick up the phone again." He scolds you but his anger washes away when he sees you with red eyes and sniffling uncontrollably.

"Hajime." She calls out, as Oikawa sighs into his pillow realizing it's another night of him acting as Iwaizumi. He's already heard all the things you wanted to say to the missing boy and he accepted the fact that you'll never have the heart to say it to Iwaizumi himself.

"Why do I miss you, now that you're out of my life?" You cried. Oikawa only rests his chin on the palm of his hand as you continued to pour your sadness upon him. You swing the bottle in your hands before downing another wave of liquor.

"I wanna know what you're doing tonight." You whisper as you take your phone, clicking on Iwaizumis contact but before you could, Oikawa spoke, knowing your next intentions.

"No, not again Y/N." He says but you shake your head your finger threatening to press it already.

"Y/N listen to me, Iwa would have contacted you right now but this isn't the time!" He argued but you scoffed, angry tears brimming in your eyes.

"No! Then when will that time come then! I've been waiting for so fucking long already! It's never gonna happen 'cause he's forgotten me- Fuck!" You shouted, taking Oikawa by surprise as you collapse to the floor once again, Oikawa coming back to the sight of you he wanted to forget.

"Y/N- babe I'm sorry-"

"Enough, Oikawa. If you could've been honest that Hajime's found another, then-then maybe I-" your voice cracks as you stressfully runs your fingers through your hair, gripping it tight in your hands as you let out another doleful sob, breaking Toorus heart.

"I don't know what do anymore." You whispered, your heart shattering in to even more finer pieces. You couldn't even put into words how you've been in torment for years.

It finally dawned on you that you weren't headed to the altar, you were headed in a different path.

Without him.

"Y/N- listen- Iwaizumi-" you ended the call leaving Oikawa stunned as he drops the phone in his hands in frustration and in regret. He decided to visit Iwaizumi, knowing it'd be hard to ever communicate with you again, especially that you've been struck by a wrong thought.

And no one else could handle you the way Hajime would.

"Iwa-chan."

"Oikawa? What is it?"

"I fucked up, I'm sorry."

-

Iwaizumi held his breath as Oikawa explained what happened. He couldn't wrap his head around the unintentional pain Oikawa has given you.

"Iwa, I'm so sorry." Tooru says, making Iwaizumi close his eyes visioning your features crushing at the idea of him having somebody by his side.

Hajimes eyes would never betray you. The only reflection that stayed in his eyes, was the future that was thrown away.

"Oikawa, hey it's okay, I understand." Iwaizumi says with a soft tone to assure Oikawa. Tooru would never intentionally hurt you, he was there to save you. Even if Iwaizumi didn't ask him to take care of you, Oikawa would do everything to bring a smile on your lips. As much love you have to Hajime, its the same amount you have to Oikawa.

"Leaving isn't bad because you're gonna come back with something even better and that's the best version of yourself."

It's your words that he counted on. He believed that he wasn't being selfish, or prideful. You made him believe that finding himself was enough to get him all the medals, the passion, and everything he wanted. So he'd want nothing more than to give thanks to you.

"Iwa."

Oikawa breaks the silence. Iwaizumi looks at him while biting down on his fingers, his heart beating too loudly at the thought of you.

"Why didn't you call her- not even giving her a proper goodbye." Tooru asks with masked anger in his tone. How could he help Hajime when he's blocking him from the truth?

"Iwaizumi. Answer me. For once." Oikawa begs, but once he's met with the silence, he's never been more eager to give in to anger.

"I just- I can't let it happen again, Oikawa. Not to her, not to us."

"Baby, what movie do you want to watch on Saturday? I've seen so many good ones lately." Iwaizumi turns to you with an exhausted expression. You were arranging the condiments in the cabinet, waiting for his response.

"Can't we- reschedule? I-I have something to go to-"

"You can't blow me off for the third time this week, Iwa." You spat, sick of the excuses. Has it really been three times? Iwaizumi questions as he leans on the couch, letting out a sigh. To which is a response you didn't expect to receive.

"I've been busy." He lied, he may not feel it, but there wasn't a single hesitation when he spoke. You memorize his schedules, his after meetings, the excused he's mentioned didn't even bother to make sense. It hurt how he was able to come up so easily, not even thinking about you'd be able to piece them all together.

"Or are you just tired, Iwaizumi?"

You asked rudely. He looks at you before rolling his eyes, covering your heart in bitterness at his pride.

"So what if I am?"

He talked back, hitting you with a bigger wave of emotions. You slammed the door of the cabinet, marching to him each step mixed with rage and pain.

"You're tired? Imagine what I've been feeling, Hajime!" You shout, volume picking up on your tone as this makes Iwaizumi stand up from the couch, not backing down at the power of your voice.

"Clingy? Needy? Pathetic? Tell me, does that sound any different to you?" He said it with so much disgust, strong enough to make you doubt everything you've fought for.

"So you don't give a fuck? Is that what you're so proud of, Iwaizumi? That you're so fucking insensitive?" He felt a tug on his heart when you called him that. It's been so long since he's heard you say it so- normal. As odd as it is, he couldn't hear his name the same again, especially when it came from you.

"Exactly! God I- Y/N. This is why-"

"WHAT IWAIZUMI!"

"This why I'm so fucking tired of you!" He shouted, not only did it create a barrier in your apartment, it brought up your past barrier that he broke down but now he's the cause of it to return.

"You're just- can you even make it on your own without me? It's like if I leave you'd- lose your shit! We need space!" He was fuming with confused anger as you feel your throat give out. You were shaking, your heart was too fast and unsteady, you weren't the same.

"But space is what you've been giving me! Coming home so late? Standing me up? You don't even fucking realize how many dates we missed!" He scoffs before running his fingers through his raven hair. Taking a step towards you, making you stand your ground as you tilt your head to meet with his empty eyes.

This isn't the man who could love you forever and ever after.

"So what! I've got so many things to do apart from dealing with your shit!" You stare back at him, weakened at how your heart couldn't handle it anymore.

You looked down, feeling the sting in your hands when your nails digged into the skin of your palm. He sits down on the couch, drained from the war full of shouting and the damage his heart was in.

Surprisingly, you sat beside him but there was such an intense distance between you.

He turns to you but chills ran up his spine when he sees how you look like you've agreed to everything he's said, making his eyes widen at the foreign feeling.

This is what he was scared of. Failing to find interest in the same routine, to find the energy to continue like he used to. Being worn out by how repetitive things were even when the love you both had was nowhere near boring.

In fact, it was exhilarating. You were both curious to try things together, that's what led you to even owning an apartment together, planning a future, even planning your marriage that was now a blur.

He trembled. Regret, anxiousness, exhaustion. He didn't expect himself to feel this way, especially to you, who he loved completely but felt a certain drift in his heart. He looks away from you as his eyes trail on the picture of you two. He couldn't hold it in his hands to look at how happy he looked, because he isn't the same anymore.

He's lost his way.

"D-did I..lack something?" She asks quietly. He gulps at her question. It was so heavy to him. How you asked him, questioning yourself in this relationship. With anxious hands, he wanted to reach out for you but his efforts were surpassed when he felt a wall between you and him.

"Am I worth.. to keep?"

Please, baby. He begs in his mind for you to stop. He couldn't register how he couldn't make himself speak. He was holding back too much, terrified that he was going to break you more and more with every word he'd toss to you.

"Then this is pointless isn't it?"

You both look at each other, both met with different expressions in your eyes. Iwaizumi could see how tired you were, how he knew you wouldn't be able to look at him the same way before, since he gave up first. While you can see how there wasn't a single lie in his eyes, the downfall was upon you.

No matter the space you give him, there can never be a spark to bring him back.

He bit his lip, facing the truth. Even he knew there isn't any other way.

"I know what you're gonna say, Hajime."

"Princess.. I'm sorry"

"Just go." It was impossible for him to follow your orders when all he wishes is to stay but then again, he's run out of reasons to.

"You gave up, Iwa!" Oikawa shouts, standing up to the boy. Iwaizumi lets his eyes wonder on the floor because he said nothing but the truth.

"There isn't anything I can-"

He's heard enough. You've asked Oikawa many heartbreaking questions. They were all unanswerable, and it pained him he couldn't give you at least one. He was in pain as much as you were. He hated how stupid Iwaizumi was for leaving you and choosing to cower away. He hated how you blamed yourself and slashing your heart because of Iwaizumi.

The tension has set fire to Oikawa and with years of loyalty between the two, Oikawa throws a heavy punch to Iwaizumi, disgusted of his actions.

Iwaizumi, completely at shocked at Oikawas punch, steps back a few times before his blood dropped on his fingers. Oikawa walks straight to Iwaizumi capturing his collar and pulling the boy upwards, nothing but rage consuming the setter.

"Did you love her then? Don't tell me this bullshit that you can't go back to her. Do you even wanna know what she asks me?" Iwaizumi removes Oikawas hands from his shirt, crumpling it in the process. Oikawa lets out a sarcastic laugh as he looks at Hajime.

"Ah, so you know how much shit you put her through? Then maybe you are an asshole but god- Iwa she loves you so much. If that isn't a good enough reason for you to talk to her, then I'll find somebody else for her." Oikawa threatens as Iwaizumi lets out a sob, nothing but regret that he hurt two of the most important people on his life.

"But what if it happens again?"

Iwaizumi asks, it was the only thing that held him back for returning into your arms. He isn't stable enough to return when the fear lingers in his head. What if he falls out of love? What if he gets tired again? Then you'll never want his presence again. He couldn't master up the courage because he too was scared of it.

He will not go through dozens of years just to be apart from you. He's already lost his mind to see you and Oikawa face the tragedy that he left you with. He felt nauseated with himself. How can he promise you forever when it was out of his grasp?

"Why don't you find out?"

It was a simple sentence that left Oikawas lips yet it brought Hajime to tears. It would've been that easy. If he didn't stay with his demons, then maybe you were here to offset his heart. After 2 years, isn't it too late to realize that he's never really ran out of love? It strengthened, but he was so afraid of battling with you like you did, hating how he was the man who shattered your overall being.

"Thank you, Oikawa."

He whispers as Oikawa takes a seat beside him, smiling that he brought the boy to realize the amount of time he's wasted by being surrounded by doubt. Oikawa pats the boys shoulder, sighing in relief that Iwaizumi was back.

"Always."

-

You swore to avoid your phone the entire day. As much as you wanted to apologize to Oikawa for the outburst, you just wanted a day of silence since your thoughts never give you the chance. Not only did you promise to avoid technology, you decided to avoid people as well, promising to yourself you'd rather stay inside in order to avoid the envy you had for other couples.

So here you are, tucked in your jacket, wrapped in your blanket waking up from a 4 hour nap. You yawned before squinting when you open your phone. It's 8pm and your stomach was nowhere near happy. Slowly standing up, you make your way to the kitchen opening the fridge seeing absolutely no hope to make a meal. Sighing lazily, you decided it'd be best to just buy some food.

After getting ready, you step out of your apartment as you drive to the place where you usually order. You admired how the moon lit your way. Opening your windows you smile when the cold whiff of air instantly surrounded your car. You loved the way your hair flew in the wind while you listened to the song playing.

Once you've finished your bought dinner, you decided to take a turn in your path. Now that it was late at night, you couldn't resist to visit a place you've been missing.

You take in a deep breath as you leaned on the metal bar, loving the way the view still took your breath away. You were face to face with the nightlights and the busy town below you. Not only was it stunning but it was a place to recall some of your favorite moments with him now that you were out of your comfortless of an apartment.

"Sorry for being late, Oikawa was an ass." Iwaizumi excuses himself as he stood beside you leaning on the rod, smiling once he takes in the lights. He turns to you before removing his jacket and placing it on your shoulders, a sweet gesture that had you blushing every time.

You couldn't refuse knowing he would've scolded you. Instead, you stood closer to him before leaning your head on his arm. With his hand, he interlaced his fingers with yours, as your heart flutters. He takes in your hand, placing a gentle kiss on it as you did the same with his hand making him twirl you in satisfaction. You giggle before landing on his chest as he leans down and places his warm hands to your cheeks as he leans in to take your lips with his.

You immediately wrap your arms around his neck, reciprocating his kiss. He's given you hundreds of kisses before, how is this any different than the rest?

He pulls away, as your foreheads touch as you both painted a smile on your lips, feeling a slight tickle to it with how flustered you both were.

"I love you so much." He whispers, the first time he's ever let the three words slip from his mouth. Your hands make their way his hair, grabbing it lightly before nodding happily.

"I love you more, my Hajime."

Who knew that just by saying those three words, it was enough for you to believe in an ever after with him? Maybe you were wrong to fall for it even though he gave you a fragment of your so called forever.

You glanced beside you to see a vacant spot and you let out a disappointed sigh. You take in the sight of your fingers, missing the way it perfectly fit in his and how he held it with so much care, giving you an idea that he'd never let you go. Unfortunately he broke this bond but you still longed for his skin to be at contact with yours again.

You sat down placing your hand on the bench as you close your eyes leaning your back on it. You felt a shift of weight beside you, someone finally accompanying you in this lonely night but you've caught on the familiar scent of the stranger and you let the name slid off your tongue.

"Hajime."

He turns to you in shock that you knew it was him but you open your eyes, turning your head to be faced with the man you've been longing to see in two years. He looked the same, the same face who clouded your dreams. He was certainly your Hajime, the pretty boy you've adored since you were in high school.

Happy anniversary. You silently greet each other. How bittersweet, isn't it? What was meant to be your 6th year, turned into 2 years of avoiding each other.

And as you took in Iwaizumis appearance, he did the same with you. Loving the way your features clicked in his memory instantly. Was it even possible for you to be even more beautiful? To Iwaizumi, it was. He absolutely missed you, but why was his heart nervous?

What do I do? He asks himself. Small talk isn't what you deserved. God- you deserve so much more. Endless hours of talking, his embrace, his love, that's what you missed. He was willing to love you with everything he's got, now knowing he'll never run out of it because he isn't scared anymore.

"This isn't a dream is it?" You asked as you turn back to the sky counting the stars that was above you. He was glad you broke the silence, and he appreciated how there wasn't the same tension before. It felt so- serene and unique. Something he wishes it'd be a good sign for the both of you.

"I can't believe it either." He exclaims making you smile. You couldn't ask him how he's doing, not wanting to drag on a conversation you've waited years for to happen, you couldn't let it be bland and meaningless.

"We were something weren't we?" You asked with a soft smile. Iwaizumi chuckles beside you, as he sits closer to you. The cold air swirling around you two as well as the car noised filling in the comforting silence.

"God, I miss what that's like." Iwaizumi answers as you look at him. You looked down on the floor with tears appearing again, the same as Iwaizumi. You were both craving to hold each other but it didn't sit right to just rush into each other knowing there's so much to unpack.

Maybe it was a bit unexpected that you'd face him this way. Echoing through your ears was the conversation between you and Tooru about how the time never came. Now, you weren't even close to being prepared. You both imagined a proper conversation wherein you two would agree to meet up and talk things out. Yet subconsciously, you came to the same place at the same time not even knowing you'd meet. You lacked strength to bundle the words that you've always wanted to say to him and he felt the same way.

The last time you sat next to each other, that was when you parted. Now, back in the same position, it felt overwhelming. Seeing each other for the first time, both had you shocked and careful of your words. You wanted to scream how much you loved him, and he wanted to hold you in his arms to wash away the bleeding of your heart.

You loved how the universe made you two meet. It was quite painful that it had to be the place where you've shared so many memories with him. You didn't know if this was a blessing in disguise but you couldn't complain when the love of your life was here, beside you.

When he saw you, he felt like the sun shined above him like it did every morning. Where he had an angel to wake up next to, when he couldn't spot a single imperfection in your skin when the sun danced in your beauty.

And you've finally remembered the way his touch would bring you the assurance without words. His unexpected kisses, his sweet embrace, his smile that makes your heart run a marathon.

You're finally here. You both think, your hearts synced in how you've waited for this moment.

With your hand on the bench, he places his hand on top of yours, feeling like it was too fragile to hold but you didn't pull away. He takes in your features in the moonlight as his heart picks up the pace at the feeling that washes over him.

There isn't a barrier anymore.

Having the chance to hold your hand like this, he'll never take this for granted again. His everything, back in his touch, god how lucky he was. Remembering Oikawas words, one thing was clear to Iwaizumi, and that was the fact that he couldn't afford to have another hiccup in your relationship.

"We really fucked up this time." Iwaizumi comments making the both of you chuckle as he intertwines your hands with his, smiles on either your faces now that you've finally found the path to each other.

[ethanharli]

Parings: Tanjiro Kamado x Top Male Reader

Warnings: Cursing

DNI; if you use she/her pronouns.

[A/n]- I took this from my Seme Male Reader book on Wattpad so um- yeah! Hope y'all like it.

____________

"For fucks sake Tanjiro!" I grumbled, pulling the stubborn male down into my lap, not caring for the yelp that ripped through his throat as I did so. "Watch your language [Y/n]!" Tanjiros mother scolded, pointing a spatula at me with a scary gaze that I swear only mothers can manage. "Yes ma'am! I'm sorry" I smiled a bit before turning my gaze back to the tired red head resting against my chest, practically dozing off in my lap. I sighed through my nose, pushing the male up in order to brush my fingers through his long hair, earning a sigh of content from him, "You need to stop over working yourself Tanjiro, its not good for your health" I whispered just loud enough for him to hear while I fixed up his hair, pulling it into a small ponytail.

"And don't tell me none of that 'I'm the oldest' crap it doesn't matter, you shouldn't just put all these responsibilities on yourself like this" My eyes narrowed a bit, feeling a dull ache pull at my heart but quickly pushed it away, finishing up the ponytail in a quick motion. I've been around for a long time, just being a year or so older then the red head that I've known since he was born, after their fathers death Tanjiro made it his job to do whatever he could to help out, even if that meant he'd stumble through my doors at ungodly hours of the night because for once he knew he couldn't do something on his own. My attention was brought back when I heard soft snores and more weight applied on my body, realizing he had fell asleep against me as I was thinking.

"I'm glad he has you around" My gaze shifted towards Tanjiro's mother, who watched us with a loving gaze in her eye's, "He's such a stubborn boy, but he listens to you more than anyone" Her words caused me to pout when a blush crept up my cheeks, grumbling a bit under my breath I wrapped my arm securely around Tanjiro's waist while slipping my other one under his legs, lifting him and myself off the ground with ease. "He talks about you a lot y'know? He admires you, looks up to you, so truly [Y/n] thank you" My grip tighten a bit, not realizing until Tanjiro shifted in my arms, but I couldn't help the harsh pain that spread through my chest, gripping at my core with guilt weighing down on me.

You shouldn't be.

I bit back the words, and showed a fake smile before going to set Tanjiro on his bed. Gently brushing a few stands of hair out of his face before hesitantly leaning down, pressing a soft kiss to the scar on his forehead, "I'm sorry, but this needs to be done.." Was all I could utter out before leaving the house, feeling the first flakes of snow land on my [S/t] skin, looking back at the house I smiled softly, taking in all the memories I've had here, before finally walking into the woods. Letting a green glow coat my figure as I dragged my claws against a frail tree trunk, disappearing into the snow.

------

Blood seeped into the snow as a foot pressed firmly into my chest, slowly breaking the bone beneath it. "You really thought you could protect them? You're weak, and never stood a chance so just lay here and die" The breath was knocked out of me when I was kicked into a tree, forcing a searing pain to spread throughout my back as my canines pierced my tongue in order to hold back my scream, not wanting to give the male any satisfaction. "You're no guardian, so give up the act already" The words weighed down on me along with the previous scenes that passed through my mind, the screams from the kids I've grown to adore, the silent pleas of a mother begging for her childrens lives to be spared, he was right, I am no guardian, not anymore.

I don't remember how long I laid in the snow before I finally crawled my way over to Nezuko, after noticing she still had a faint pulse. My wounds took much longer to heal since I haven't eaten in years, and I've been fighting off sleep for as long as I could remember, my body felt as if it was giving out but I simply wouldn't allow it, not after failing to save the only people who took care of me, who gave me a home. Pulling Nezuko into my arms I felt tears slowly slide down my bloodied and bruised cheeks, "I'm so sorry Nezuko" I coughed out, not paying attention to the sound of footsteps approaching, nor the sound of something hitting the ground. "[Y/n]? Nezuko?" The broken whisper caused my eyes to widen in panic, looking over to see Tanjiro standing before me with broken, disbelieving eye's.

He quickly ran over to us, dropping to his knees frantically. "Wh-what- are you-" He fumbled, not forming any real words until I brushed my fingers against his cheek in a soft, soothing motion that always seemed to calm him down. Tears slowly spilled from those beautiful dark red eyes, "I'm sorry Tanjiro.." I held but an ironic laugh, knowing that the only thing I can and have done is apologize, but I slowly guided his face towards mine, resting his forehead against mine that formed a familiar green glow, "Please forget" I laughed out a saddened cry, shifting around so that I could settle Nezuko in his arms, "Please forget I was here."

------

"[Y/n]..?" A groan ripped past my aching throat, the feeling of webs tightening around my body restricting me from any movement becoming known once again as I attempted to open my eyes, feeling to weak to do so as I listened to the shed doors slide open, expecting Rui to enter and use me once again. "Get on with it Rui.. There's nothing you can do, That you haven't already done.." My voice came barely above a whisper flexing my hands a bit, causing my claws to sharpen by the slightest as a familiar warm feeling spread across my cheek, finally forcing my eyes to open, only to be meet with a beautiful dark red. "Oh, hi.." Was the only thing I could mutter out when Tanjiro looked at me through that familiar concerned glare of his, it was only a split second until the webbing broke, and the sudden weight of gravity pulled me down, causing me to land against Tanjiro's toned chest.

Sobs echoed through the rotted shed, feeling the warmth of Tanjiros body against mine sending me into a peaceful state as he cried into my shoulder, gripping tightly onto my bare bleeding torso. "I-I missed you so much!" The sudden cry made my ears ring, hissing a bit at the action, earning a string of apologizes from the red head when he placed both hands against my cheeks, resting his forehead against my own, just like I had done last time we saw each other. We sat there for a moment, breaths mingling along with the soft noise of sniffles coming from Tanjiro, tears still slowly falling from his eyes. Gently I took his wrists in my hands, watching as his eyes fluttered open, catching my gaze with his own.

"I missed you too.." My words fell on deaf ears when I leaned in, capturing his lips with my own in a slow, desperate motion. Feeling my heart slam against my ribcage when he kissed back, tilting his head to deepen the kiss while my hand moved to his cheek, being careful so I wouldn't accidentally cut him with my claws. Pulling away in order to fall against his chest, laying my head on his shoulder, slowly falling back into the comforting darkness.

------

A gasp ripped past my throat as I sprung forward, reaching out for the figure that still lingered in my distant memory, "Tanjiro.." His name rolled of my tongue with such longing that my chest ached at the thought of not being near him. Only for my eyes to widen when a calloused hand took mine in there's, seeing the male I had just called out for standing besides me with a worried yet relieved gaze. Turning towards him I watched as he sat down on the chair besides the bed I was in, keeping my hand in his as he did so, "I thought I'd never see you again" He whimpered out, tears slowly gathering in his eyes while his grip on my hand tightened. "And when I opened that shed I thought.. I thought you were-" With saddened eyes I quickly pulled the male into my lap, like I used to do all those years ago.

My arms tightened around his waist, desperate to finally have him back in my arms again, "Im still here though aren't I? I promise I won't leave your side again, not until you want me too" I uttered out, slowly remembering that he must know what I am by now, but here he is, not struggling nor screaming while in my grasp. "Then stay by my side forever! I can't.. I can't bare to see you leave again" The words weighed down on me, causing my shoulders to sag as I let out pathetic sigh until Tanjiro turned my gaze back towards him. His arms wrapped around my neck while his fingers laced through my hair, dark red eyes staring into my [E/c] ones with a deep wanting lingering within them.

His breath hitched when my eyes fluttered closed, taking his lips with mine in attempt to feel that warm loving feeling again, that only he could give me. He moved his lips with mine in a slow motion as his fingers tightened their grip on my hair, while I pressed him closer against me craving for more of the warmth he provided, along with the taste of his lips. Tanjiro gave me a look of confusion when I parted or lips, scrunching my nose up in slight disgust, "You taste like medicine" Was all I could speak before he erupted into a fit of laughter that sounded like music to my ears.

My eyes softened as I watched the male seeing his usual wide smile when I rested my hand on his cheek, gently running my thumb over the dark bag under his eye, "I love you Tanjiro, I always have.." I admitted, with a small grin.

"I love you too [Y/n].."

[2jaeh]

milky way | youngtaek

you find unexplainable comfort in the words of your favorite poet, but he has a deeper connection to you than you think.

genre: fluff, a little angst

word count: 1.4k

author lin

Your favorite part of the day was curling up on the couch with a hot beverage, scrolling through your phone and having the television on low, offering great background noise so the apartment felt less empty. When the clock struck 7pm you knew you would be receiving that notification from the one person on Instagram that you cared enough to keep up with.

They were a poet who went by the name April and they were quite popular on the social media platform, despite never revealing any information about themself save for what deep feelings were incorporated into their poems. You found a great sense of comfort in their work and you were always anticipating to read their poems.

That day, April had revealed a poem titled 'Milky Way'. The post contained a plain white canvas with the words scribbled in black ink on the left side and a relevant drawing on the right - the standard format for all of their works. For this particular poem, the drawing was of a shooting star with a tiny person looking up towards it.

The poem described a relationship between two people that was so dazzlingly perfect that everyone around them was envious of how perfectly they were made for each other. Alas life moved to a point where the narrator could barely contact their lover and they slowly drifted out of each other's lives. The narrator still had lingering feelings for that person and could never truly move on. The final words of the poem read, Nothing without you, nothing without you… 

April's poems always hit close to home and prompted you to think about your own life and experiences, but Milky Way in particular felt as though you yourself was the narrator in question. A few years ago you had also been in a relationship that was so full of bliss. The boy was named Youngtaek and you always joked about how he set a standard for any other guy you would ever meet, but it was true. 

He was an aspiring songwriter and rapper and often wrote songs about you. He was someone that you could tell anything to and he would never judge. He always showered you with compliments that helped you find confidence in yourself. He encouraged you to try new things and a lot of milestones in your life involved him. Your first kiss, your first time and even your first experience getting chased out of a movie theater because he screamed too loud at the horror movie onscreen.

People who claimed the honeymoon phase didn't last forever clearly did not see the three years the two of you spent together. However, all good things must come to an end. Youngtaek left for Japan to further his studies while you stayed behind. You stayed in good contact for a long time, until you both started to live your own lives with different friends, different timezones, different lifestyles. It was a mutual decision to just end the relationship and move on, but your feelings for him could never disappear that easily.

Since the poem had tapped into an integral part of your mind, you decided to leave a comment. You never did leave comments on April's work - it was quite pointless considering they were so popular and your comment would just disappear into the swarm of others - but you were running on sentimentality at that point. 

@______: Thank you for this, I wonder if the lover will ever know the impact they had on the narrator… 

You left your phone aside and turned the television volume up to watch whatever game show was going on. Despite your eyes being on the screen, your thoughts were still filled with Youngtaek and the poem. The only thing that was able to snap you out of your own world was a chime from your phone. You grabbed your phone and opened up the notification. 

@aprilpoetry: @______ I think they do now… 

Your eyes widened at the comment before contorting into a confused frown. First of all, April didn't reply to their fans often so the interaction did catch you by surprise. Second of all, what did they mean by that? The message was so short and vague, but you didn't want to read too much into it. April was notorious for trolling and pranking their followers so you shrugged it off.

Your notifications were flooded with people liking and leaving congratulatory words on your comment. It was so overwhelming that you almost missed a direct message notification you had received. You opened the message up and you couldn't hold back the gasp that escaped your lips upon seeing it was from April. 

@aprilpoetry: As you know, I will be releasing my first book this Friday. We'll be having a small party to celebrate and I'm looking to invite some interesting fans to join us. Would you be interested?

@______: Me? 

@aprilpoetry: Of course. Your comment piqued my interest. 

@______: My comment? 

April was typing for a long time and you didn't know why you were becoming nervous. You couldn't even believe this conversation was happening. Your phone pinged and you looked down to see details as to when and where the party was being held. 

@aprilpoetry: I hope to see you there

+++++

After days of deliberation, you finally settled on just going to the party. The interaction with April was quite strange and your curiosity really got the better of you. You arrived at the venue - a sleek dining hall decorated in black and white and adorned in pictures of the art that usually featured alongside April's poems.

You floated around the room, taking the drink that a server offered you and inspecting the snack table for anything you might like. Everyone else was already engrossed in their own conversations, presumably about April's poetry. You felt somebody stand next to you, but your eyes stayed fixated on the pink drink in your hands. 

"The mini pizzas are really good." The person next to you spoke and you almost shuddered at the familiarity of their voice. 

You looked up to see Youngtaek smiling down at you. He was wearing black turtleneck with a black blazer thrown over his shoulders. He looked older and much more mature than from when you last saw him. His hair was dyed bright red and his ears were adorned with pretty piercings. He still had the same sparkly eyes that you had adored so much.

"What are you doing here?" You asked in a small voice and he chuckled lightly. 

"It's been a while hasn't it?" Youngtaek ran his fingers through his hair with a sheepish grin on his face, "well actually, we've been closer than we think." 

"What do yo-" 

"I'm April, ______," he cut you off and your eyes widened comically, making him laugh, "when I saw you comment on my post I couldn't believe it was really you. 

"I actually refused to believe it was, so I invited you here to find out," he let out a nervous sigh, "I'm… I'm really glad you're here and you read that poem." 

"I've read all of your poems," you admitted and now it was his turn to look surprised, "I've always followed your account and I… really love your work… Milky Way just hit very close to home." 

"I missed you, every day," Youngtaek admitted, stepping closer to you, "every time I'd think I moved on from us but then you'd cloud my thoughts all the time, just like what I said in Milky Way." 

"I missed you too," you smiled at him when you saw his eyes light up, "I guess it's fate that we found each other again." 

Youngtaek grinned at your words before leaning closer and placing his lips on yours. It felt so familiar, the feeling of kissing him while soft music sounded from the speakers, yet butterflies still fluttered in your tummy. His hands came up to cup your face as you gently held onto his wrists. He pulled away just a few centimeters away to admire your flustered face as his cherry lips curled into a smile. 

"So are we doing this again?" You laughed lightly. 

"Only if you want to ______." Youngtaek grinned, softly running his hands down your arms. 

"Of course April Poetry." 

[emachinescat]

So I've been wanting to write this since 5x10, but just now got the chance. This is a look at the ending scene from Murdoc's creepy, possessive obsession with Mac, and it plays with the idea of what might have happened if Bozer hadn't done the trick with the static (sorry Boze for taking away your moment of glory, but creepy Murdoc trumps hero time). Anyway, I hope you enjoy my twist on this episode. It was fun to write. Murdoc is fun to write. What does that say about me? ;)

Title: Murdoc + MacGyver - Everyone Else | Fandom: MacGyver 2016

Summary: AU ending to 5x10. Murdoc never planned on killing MacGyver in that skyscraper. Certainly not for the likes of Andrews. Or, in which Bozer doesn't do his trick with the comms and Murdoc sends a very clear message to all of Codex that MacGyver is HIS.

Characters | Pairings: Murdoc, Mac, Andrews, Riley, Desi

Words: 2,594

TW: Murdoc being creepier than usual, I guess

AO3 Tags: Murdoc Is Obsessed with MacGyver, Obsessive Murdoc, Possessive Murdoc, Angus MacGyver (MacGyver TV 2016) Whump. Hurt Angus Macgyver (Macgyver 2016), Season/Series 05, 5x10, 5x10 au, Implied MacRiley, Manhandling, Creepy Murdoc (MacGyver TV 2016), Obsessive Behavior, TW Creepy Obsession, Diamond + Quake + Carbon + Comms + Tower, Murdoc POV

Full story here or on AO3!

It was adorable, really, Murdoc thought as he lowered the improvised cutting torch slowly, steadily, agonizingly closer to MacGyver’s bruised and bloody face, that Eric Andrews thought that Murdoc was going to go through with this.  The general was a ridiculous man, the kind that Murdoc most enjoyed killing.  Arrogant and pretentious,yet stupid enough to believe he could manipulate, even control, Murdoc, he was a man who would look lovely with Murdoc’s gun pressed squarely between his eyes.

Yet despite his faults, he had been useful.  He’d helped Murdoc escape from the blacksite, and in return, Murdoc had vowed to help him set a trap for MacGyver.  Andrews wanted to broadcast Angus’s death to the heads of a terror cell.  It was his way of “interviewing” to become the head of the organization.  And what would Murdoc get out of this arrangement?  Other than his freedom, he would be given the opportunity to play with MacGyver before Andrews dealt the final blow.

So Murdoc used Andrews to escape the blacksite, and together they set this ingenious little trap for the genius himself.  He’d used Andrews and his resources as a means of playing his newest game.  He smiled and nodded when Andrews spouted his rhetoric, adjusted his plans as Andrews directed, and valiantly kept from gutting the egocentric wackadoodle – somehow – during the course of their time together.  He’d almost snapped and killed the guy, once.

He hated the way that Andrews spoke about his Angus MacGyver, gloated about how cathartic it would be to see the light go out of those blue eyes.  How he relished the notion of feeling MacGyver’s life sleep away, how he fantasized about wrapping his chains around that smooth, pale neck and squeezing , slowly and intimately, with all of Codex watching – after Murdoc had had his fun with him, of course.

Murdoc’s profession had always allowed him to maintain a rather fluid lifestyle, and until MacGyver had come onto the scene, the killer had moved from one job to the next without distraction.  He had never been one to get caught up or fixated on any one thing – as a killer, he understood the impermanence of life in a way few others could.

That is, until Angus “Boy Wonder” MacGyer.  Suddenly, Murdoc had a muse, a partner in his games, a worthy opponent, his very own Sherlock to his Moriarty.  And the thought of anyone – especially Andrews, that self-important crackpot who was so empty all he could do was spout the words of people who’d come before him – looking at Angus MacGyver with that kind of fire in their eyes, that kind of hatred, that dark intent, stirred something primal and angry deep within the hollow, twisted remnants of Murdoc’s soul.  Even worse was hearing that obnoxious, pedantic voice boasting about all the ways he planned to hurt MacGyver, all the ways he planned to kill him in front of a live studio audience.  A foregin, almost protective rush had overcome Murdoc.  The things that Andrews described, the torture, the killing itself – those were things that no one except for Murdoc himself could do to Angus MacGyver.

Murdoc could have snapped and killed him, then.  He almost had.  The trap had been set, MacGyver would soon be on his way.  Murdoc could take out Andrews in one surprise hit and wait for his BFF to arrive.  They might even get some time alone together before the rest of the love triangle showed up.  But he had stayed his hand.  He needed Andrews to contact Codex.  He had a message he needed to send.

And so he’d resisted the drumbeats of death so loud they blocked out his thoughts, and hadn’t put a bullet between Andrews’s eyes.

And now, here he was, in the moment of truth.  It had been a bold move, out of character, if you will, for Murdoc to take on MacGyver in hand-to-hand combat.  Normally, Murdoc avoided using brute force, not because it wasn’t fun – because, boy howdy, was it fun – but because his tools were much more precise than fists, and could cause more pain with less chance of unintended damage.

But this was a special occasion, and he allowed himself to indulge.  And it was a truly delicious situation, made all the more exhilarating with the knowledge that so many people were watching him work.  Not Codex – he hadn’t given a rat’s ass about Codex in that moment – but Phoenix, whom Murdoc had just manipulated and played with like a puppet master with his creepy little mannequins.  He kept an eye on the girls, and chills ran down his body as he saw the fear and desperation in their eyes, the way they strained helplessly against their bonds to get to their friend who was himself completely at Murdoc’s mercy.  He couldn’t see Matilda or Bozer or Taylor, but he could hear the fear in their voices when they spoke, and his mind’s eye conjured a splendid picture of their terrified eyes fixated on the screen, forced to watch as their golden boy was beaten and eventually murdered in front of them.  It was glorious .  Murdoc wished that moment could go on forever.

He truly had relished every hit he’d landed on MacGyver.  Bless him, he tried to fight back, but he was just a spy trained in field comat.  Murdoc was a killer.  Just because he didn’t use his fists that much anymore, it didn’t mean he didn’t know how to.  He was quick, and stronger than his lithe frame would suggest.  Beneath the long-sleeved shirts and black leather jackets, lean, deadly muscles lurked like a snake in the grass, always ready to strike – and strike fast.  Every kick, every hit, every punch to the face sent bolts of electricity up Murdoc’s arms.  He saw the moment when MacGyver’s cheek split open, watched the blood slowly trickle down as he wound up for another hit.  After about three hits directly to the face, MacGyver couldn’t hold himself up anymore and he made weak, desperate grabs for Murdoc’s jacket.  Murdoc felt the tug on the fabric, relished the feeling of MacGyver needing him in that moment.  When he threw MacGyver against the heavy metal support, he felt like a god.

Now here we was, with his greatest foe having literally just been under his boot.  His left hand was wrapped around MacGyver’s right wrist, pinning it down, his knee pressed against the half-conscious agent’s chest to keep him in place.  In his hands he held a tool that, as he had said moments ago, would be the most poetic end to MacGyver he could have concocted – finally silenced by one of his own fancy little inventions.  For a moment, Murdoc was tempted to plow ahead, not to kill, but to play, to hurt , to watch the dazed fear in his muse’s eyes turn to pain and sheer terror… but he had more important things to do.  Maybe he would take this toy with him when he left, and save it to use on MacGyver another day.

He leaned in close, his knee pressing harder into MacGyver’s sternum, and the boy wonder grunted in pain, gasped for breath.  Murdoc leaned closer, his face inches from his prey’s, and watched MacGyver’s concussed eyes go wide at the close proximity.  Murdoc noted with satisfaction that he’d really done a number on his blue-eyed buddy this time – the pupils were unequal, one dilated and the other not.  Murdoc whispered in Mac’s ear, “Don’t worry, friend, I would never let a pig like Andrews kill you.  I’ve got your back.”  He pulled back and winked conspiratorially.  Then, in one fluid motion, he dropped the torch, drew his gun, and shot Eric Andrews one, two, three times, right in his smug, ugly face.  The general didn’t even have time to be surprised by the betrayal.  He was already dead.

From across the room, Murdoc could hear one of the girls – probably the loud, bossy girlfriend – yelling something, but he didn’t pay attention.  Instead, he gripped MacGyver by the front of his jacket, hauled him to his feet (sort of; MacGyver slumped in Murdoc’s arms, unable to stand on his own, but Murdoc had no problem with that at all), and stood there facing the drone.  He could feel MacGyver trembling in pain, and it nearly sickened him that he was going to cut this meeting short.  Still, once he took care of this pesky Codex visit, he could look forward to plenty more games with his adversarial soulmate in the future.

Glaring up at the camera, Murdoc gave Mac’s weak, beaten form a little shake.  “See this guy?” he demanded, not waiting for an answer.  In the second of dead space between his question and answer, he did notice that Desiree had stopped yelling.  No one at the Phoenix was speaking.  Everyone was waiting, he knew, with bated breath, to see how this would turn out.  “Angus MacGyver, here, is mine. ”  He felt MacGyver stir weakly in his arms, protesting Murdoc’s claim even when concussed and barely cognizant.  “Hush, now, Angus,” Murdoc hissed.  “I’m trying to save your life.”

To Codex, he continued, “I love a good murder as much as the next guy.  Hell, more than the next guy.  Way more than him, actually.  So much more that I’ll kill the next guy just to scratch that itch.”  He grinned his most feral grin.  “But MacGyver is not on the market, you hear me?  The only one who is allowed to murder him is me .  Your Andrews was pathetic, a great brute who pretended at being a scholar because it made him feel important.  I meant what I said earlier, fellas – and ladies – this guy is so smart.  Way too smart for the likes of you.  Too smart for Andrews.”

He bared his teeth, shaking MacGyver once more to emphasize his point.  “Angus is my muse.  He’s my dance partner in this crazy murder-tango we’ve been doing for the past few years.  You thought I was being dramatic when I started reminiscing about the good old days earlier?”  He paused, thought, then amended, “Okay, so I was being dramatic, but I meant. Every. Word.  And it all boils down to this: The only one who’s going to end his life is me .”

A voice from the speakers, a female’s, cold and dead, offered, “Then kill him now.  Perhaps we can find a place in Codex for one as ruthless as you.”

Murdoc laughed out loud, throwing his head back.  His body trembled with giggles, and he heard MacGyver emit a grunt of pain at the motion.  “Whoops, sorry, buddy,” he apologized giddily, then shook him a bit more, this time for fun.  MacGyver stayed steadfastly quiet this time – bor -ing!

Murdoc sobered in an instant, letting every ounce of hatred, death, and chaos flood his gaze as his lips set into a thin line and he tightened his grip on MacGyver, who pushed feebly against his arms.  “You really think I want to be a part of your girl scout troop?  Please.  Codex before Angus MacGyver happened to it, maybe.  But now?  You all are ridiculous, dethroned kings who scrabble hungrily for any crumb left to you in your moldering ruins.  You aren’t powerful.  You aren’t smart.  That Leland was the only good thing you had going for you, and now he’s gone.”  He all but purred his next words: “And with what, a shot to the chest?  Precisely aimed, almost like a hit man had taken him out?  Hmmm….”

“ You are claiming responsibility for Leland’s death?”

Murdoc shrugged.  He finally, reluctantly released his grip on MacGyver, and the blonde tumbled to the floor.  Murdoc watched from the corner of his eye as he immediately began to drag himself slowly, agonizingly, away from Murdoc and toward his gal pals.  Murdoc rolled his eyes and clamped his boot down on MacGyver’s bruised back once more, effectively pinning him in place.  Too easy.  He peered into the camera again, rolled his shoulders, cracked his neck, and hissed, “Believe what you want about Leland’s death.  But do you really want to mess with the bastard who killed this great paragon of new wave terrorism?  Not saying it was me, but damn.  Whoever this guy is must be one tough cookie.  And I would advise you, friends ,” – never had that word held so much derision – “to not play with his toys.”  He ground his heel into MacGyver’s back a little deeper.  “The TL;DR?  MacGyver is off-limits.  If you kill him, I kill you, ten times more slowly and painfully than I plan to kill him.  Got it?”

Without giving the council a chance to respond, he raised his gun and shot the drone out of the air.  He tossed the gun aside, sighed, and stepped off of a weakly moving MacGyver.  He grabbed the genius under the armpits and dragged him to the opposite side of the room from the girls.  Producing another zip tie, Murdoc secured MacGyver to the nearest piece of equipment and stood back to observe his handiwork.  Paying no mind to the sorry state he was in, Angus was already stubbornly pulling himself up to a sitting position, bloody face set in pain and determination.  “You,” he panted, lifting his eyes up to meet Murdoc’s, “are insane.”

Murdoc laughed.  “I thought we’d already established that long ago, dear.”

“Don’t call me,” MacGyver wheezed, “dear.  Despite your… delusions, I do not … belong to you.  Or to anybody.”

“Expect maybe Miss Davis?” Murdoc mocked.  “And please , Angus.  Can’t you see that I was just putting on a show for the ‘evil Zoom meeting’?”  He hadn’t been, and he could tell that MacGyver was seeing straight through his lie.  “Look,” Murdoc said, “I hate it when we fight.  How about we both take some time and pick this back up when we’ve had a little time to heal and reflect?”

Through gritted teeth, MacGyver growled, “How about you go away and never come back?”

“Tsk, tsk, Angus .  That isn’t any way to treat your rescuer.  But you are concussed, so I’ll let it slide.  Actually, I need to motor.  Now that the situation’s neutralized, the authorities will be all over this place.  I really don’t fancy going back to that blacksite, so I’ll leave you here to wait for your buddies.”  He bent down, patted MacGyver on the face, grinned when his adversary jerked his head away from the touch.  “‘Til next time, Mac .”  He made a face.  “Actually, scratch that.  My calling you Mac is almost as unsettling as Taylor calling Miss Davis Riles .”  He heard an indigent noise from over the comm – he’d almost forgotten Phoenix was listening in, they’d been so quiet.  He chuckled, relishing how fun Russ Taylor was to annoy.  “Anway, I’ll see you soon, Angus.”

Murdoc removed the comm and crushed it under his boot, then backed away and sauntered from the room, whistling his slow, eerie funeral dirge, “Home on the Range.”

He knew that even while injured and concussed, MacGyver would be out of the zipties and releasing his friends before the polícia arrived.  He’d then be whisked away to a hospital, and all of Phoenix would have to deal with the fallout of the secrets that had been revealed.  He wondered if MacGyver would choose Desiree or Riley.  In the end, though, he knew that it wouldn’t matter who MacGyver chose.  He could deny it all he wanted, but in the end, there would be Murdoc.

There would always be Murdoc.

[katytheinspiredworkaholic]

Ooh, can I have ⚡? I'm glad the longer comments are fine, I tend to go overboard when I leave reviews and with your chapters being 10k+ there's a lot to cover! Which reminds me, one thing I forgot to mention was the whole 'one true undead love concept': A+ and I can't wait until Hotch is cornered into mentioning it. I'l let you know about the notifications! Also, unrelated but I saw your Teen Wolf post: thoughts on the new movie they announced is in production based on the tv series?

omg I'm so sorry this got lost in the sea of asks and I saved it as a draft and somehow never answered it I'm so sorry!!!! Yes you can have the lightning bolt 🥰 and I adore long comments. I know this was forever ago but I'm so glad you've enjoyed what you have read so far, and the 'one true undead love' is a concept I honestly couldn't pass up 💕 it's going to be a fun time when Spencer learns about it. I've had that scene planned for... ever, probably. As long as I've been plotting this fic. The Unrelated TW note: they are making what now?! o.o I... will have to go do research on this, because I did not know they were doing that. Are any of the cast coming back? (I can't imagine they would) but wow... interesting, maybe, could be, depends on who is in it and writing it and what target audience they are aiming for. Because if it's the found werewolf pack/family trope we deserved to have more of then yes please take my money, but if it's not I will have to wait and see xD

[galvanizedfriend]

This may be a very biased question, however, who did Klaus truly love- Caroline or Cami? I absolutely adore Klaroline, but would they even had anything more if it wasn't for when Caroline visited NOLA in S5? I seems like Caroline was only brought to TO for fan service. Did Klaus love Cami more? I've been trying to understand, and the more I think about it, the more I get sad because #klaroline4ever. I need someone elses' thoughts!

Well, this may be a very biased answer (lol), but I never bought Klamille as a thing, so, obviously...

This isn't going to be very nice on Cami, in case anyone out there might find it offensive or whatever. I don't necessarily blame the character, though, I blame the writing. Klaus having a new romantic interest was never a bad thing in itself, it was the way they did it that never sailed.

To be fair, I think it's perfectly acceptable to believe that Klaus loved Cami. But that relationship was so wrong, for so many reasons, that I could never get past the awkwardness. Cami was a prop for male tears and exposition from almost the moment she came onto the show until her literal last breath (and the few times she made an appearance after that). She was the result of a very wrong attempt to try to reproduce the KC chemistry in TO to maybe get the fans to embrace this new ship, but it was so, so, so wrong... Joseph Morgan went from having chemistry with the walls and trees in TVD to not having a slight spark with the person who was supposed to be his romantic interest (whom he was pushing towards another guy all through season 1, awww... so romantic). Klaus would've been better off with Stefan.

Cami's supposed to be this moral compass on the show, the ~~kind-hearted, good, full of light~~ person (remind you of anyone? lol) who'll drag Klaus back into the path of redemption, but all she does is literally excuse him for his terrible behavior, starting with how he treats her. Klaus is awful to her, terribly abusive. He compelled her to go out with someone against her will, even after she saw Marcel being aggressive to Thierry and was like 'nope, not for me, I'm outta here', to <i>spy</i> for him. And this gets shoved under the rug in a second. Klaus kills Elijah's girlfriend right before his eyes, then he curses Hayley into her wolf form, and Cami is literally there telling people that they have to understand that he did all that because he had a plan and he had to make it look convincing. She attempts to be mad at him because he bit her (not because he killed Gia, or cursed Hayley; because he bit her) and when he says he was just pretending, she smiles and that's it. Let it go. And then I'm supposed to believe that this is the person who's going to bring the best out of Klaus? Klaus goes on being the same unapologetic jackass he always was.

And then season 3 happens and it's just... It's painful. I abandoned TO on S3 for many reasons, I couldn't watch it anymore, but what they do to Klamille there is like... Is this seriously supposed to be the climax of this pairing? When she turns into a vampire and becomes this total crazy bitch (WHY? isn't vampirism supposed to enhance what you are? WHY oh WHY would good pure cinnamon roll Cami become 500 years old Katherine?), Klaus is having doubts over her. Hayley has to tell him that he's gonna have to accept that the person he knew is gone and she's someone else now. I think it was supposed to make us realize that Cami had ~~darkness~~ in her, but... Honestly, if that was the case, there are some fic writers in the fandom who could've done a better job than the people getting paid to write those scripts.

Camille was a character that was treated so, so badly by the writers it's hard to even defend her. She had inconsistent writing, no agency within the plot whatsoever, never got her own story lines, never developed into something more substantial, and all she was there for was to explain to us, viewers, how terribly misunderstood Klaus was (and also to babysit, which is what she does all through season 2). She spends three seasons chasing after him when he repeatedly shoves her away, so when she was finally killed off, I felt genuinely sad for her. Not even her death was about her. She was meant to be a strong female character, instead she got absolutely nothing, died as a minor sidekick who got no reward out of her involvement with Klaus, and was using her last breaths to tell him "he's good". Honey, were you not watching your own show?

Caroline, on the other hand, never lets Klaus get away with being awful. She holds him accountable for the crap he does, she points fingers, she doesn't just take his bullshit excuses and 'oh, I'm so damaged' crap. At the same time she's obviously attracted to him, tempted by these little snippets of hidden depths she gets to see, she doesn't just excuse his wrongdoings. She pushes Klaus out of his comfort zone, forces him to reassess his behavior, to consider right vs convenient, and even if it's just for her sake, he actually does change. He lets Tyler off the hook (more than once), he risks getting caught to save her from those vampire hunters, he drops everything to help Stefan with Rayna Cruz, he forsakes his revenge party against Katherine. He's killing his way through France, being a crappy father to his 15yo, then Caroline shows up, stuns him with some truths, and he instantly reconsiders. It's things that meant something to Klaus, people who had personally wronged him, situation that might put him and his family in danger, not like that extra whoever cop he "helps" in S3 who made absolutely no difference in his life whether he lived or died. He even showed a degree of regret over killing Carol when he asked Damon how he got away being forgiven for the crap he did.

In turn, Klaus was always the one person who saw the best of Caroline and completely acknowledged it. She wasn't ashamed of her vampirism, she enjoyed all the perks, and while everyone else was being broody over it, sorry for themselves, she was out there kicking ass. Klaus knew her better than her best friends, understood how she longed for more, how curious she was, how restless she would grow by being stuck forever as a sidekick in Mystic Falls. Everything he said to her was like a revelation. He was the only romantic interest in Caroline's life to truly put her first. And I want to say that they never got together in TVD because she wasn't ready to leave her mortal life behind and fully embrace immortality but the truth is they never got together because some idiot decided to make The Originals happen. lol We all know that 'I should've turned my back on you ages ago' thing would've ended up in hot hybrid-vampire sex if TO hadn't been picked up by the network.

This is not to say that there weren't problems there, of course there were, but the two of them genuinely did get the best out of each other. Klaus allowed Caroline to be accepted and appreciated for who she truly was, while she got Klaus to show true selflessness.

So I personally never bought Klamille. It fell completely flat for me. But I don't think believing Klaus loved Cami diminishes how he felt for Caroline. The guy is immortal. To think he would never have feelings for anyone other than Caroline is naive. The brief little moments Caroline gets mentioned in TO are very telling of how Klaus still felt about her even years and years later. That phone call. How he never denies loving her to Stefan, how he tells Stefan they'll be seeing each other again if he doesn't do right by her. On the letter he sent her when she opens the school, he repeats the 'however long it takes', which is a reaffirmation of the promise he made her. How he says he didn't want to know if she would let him die or not. That look he gives her when she says she'd been to New Orleans after him and he wasn't there.

Caroline was his endgame, and he was hers. The two of them could've had different loves, met different people over the course of their lives, but they were always, always meant to find each other again in the end. So, to answer your question (lol), no I don't think Klaus' endgame would've ever been Camille, and yes, I do think Caroline would've ended up in New Orleans at some point, or he would've ended up with her, wherever she was. If there had been even an inch of consistency in TO S5 and if JP hadn't been on a crusade to punish the actors who were apparently unhappy with her and unwilling to ever come back for Legacies, that's how the story would've ended. It's hard to make any real interpretation of the show when we know how those scripts got written, how little thought went into staying true to characters and their journeys, but that's what I believe.

THANK YOU FOR COMING TO MY TED TALK, ANON! lol