#I remember being in rural Arizona and straight up worrying that we were going to get hate crimed

[saltineofswing]

I’ll also say — as a Californian who is, maybe not aghast or surprised but definitely angry and disappointed about how sideways the voting went in California re: progressive outcomes on the propositions at play this cycle — a big problem with this specific instance is that there is a massive propaganda effort in this state, specifically, to trick people into thinking one way or another about progressive causes. I feel that in my experience, the ‘powers that be’ know that if the language used to describe an issue is too empathetic (or, honestly, just straightforward), a measure will quickly get a lot of support. So, advertising for propositions is severely curtailed in spaces where they know younger and more motivated demographics will be watching, and counter-ads often use extremely oblique and sometimes outright misleading language to make the progressive goal of the proposition sound like a Bad Thing, Actually.

This is the Associated Press’s google tooltip that I got from googling California Prop 6:

I’ll get back to this in a second. For now, here is a link to the full text on Prop 6. It’s kind of a fucking slam dunk in my opinion! The section at the end is particularly interesting to me.

Nobody even bothered to submit an argument against. Why? Because nobody reads this stuff, and the people who didn’t want Prop 6 to pass knew that. I bet if you look into No On 6 campaigns, the rhetoric is probably highly divorced from the reality of what the proposition actually does, and is designed to trick people into thinking that it’s something completely different.

(It’s also very closely connected to the ‘return to tough-on-crime policy’ Prop 36, and they work nicely together to subjugate petty criminals.)

But I think that it’s important to remember that a lot of people just. Didn’t vote. California has something like 38 million citizens, and even if you take the above numbers as 55% of counted ballots — as per the implication in the screenshot of the AP’s tallies — that still accounts for less than half of CA’s population having voted in the first place. So, realistically… like, a quarter of the population voted No on this. Yes, that’s one in four people being OK with treating criminals however the fuck they want… but it’s a dramatic minority of the overall population.

All that said: I agree with OP, that most people don’t think twice about it and allow themselves to be carried by the cultural current. Before I really dug into it with my dad, he expressed the basic sentiment of ‘Well yeah indentured servitude is bad, but they did something wrong, so I don’t know that I mind’; but it took extremely minimal effort to point out how fucked up the situation really is (which is partially because my dad is a reasonable man, but I don’t think that most people would be that much harder to convince.) I think that cultivated apathy is easily cut through, as long as the individual in question already has a decent ethical base.

And I do believe that when it comes California’s denizens, at large, apathy really is their biggest problem. It sucks so, so bad that so few people bothered to vote down-ballot, if they voted at all, but I would rather work with the apathetic than with the outright malicious.

i've been seeing a lot of californians aghast at the proposition to abolish prisoners being used as slave labour getting voted down and i have no idea how to fix this on a societal scale but after having enough conversations with people you really do start to realise that a massive percentage of the population sees prisoners as subhuman and therefore believes that once someone is in prison for any reason then everything bad that's done to them is simply their just desserts

[billyagogo]

A survivor. A funeral director. A marriage divided. How Americans' COVID experiences shape their votes

New Post has been published on https://newsprofixpro.com/moxie/2020/11/03/a-survivor-a-funeral-director-a-marriage-divided-how-americans-covid-experiences-shape-their-votes/

A survivor. A funeral director. A marriage divided. How Americans' COVID experiences shape their votes

In Wisconsin, a funeral home director who has watched the COVID-19 pandemic rip through her community can only blame President Trump.

In Texas, little can change one woman’s loyalty to the president — not even her own struggle for breath as she lay in a hospital bed.

In New Mexico, an underemployed firearms instructor plans to cast his vote as a rebuke to Democrats he says were overzealous in closing businesses.

In Arizona, a Joe Biden voter found political detente with his Republican wife as the lingering effects of infection continue to cause them pain.

In Michigan, a school bus driver won over by the president before the pandemic deepened her devotion and took up arms to protest shutdowns.

Even before the coronavirus sunk in its teeth, the United States was deeply polarized. Facts mattered less than feelings and political parties acted like tribes.

The virus — a shared, microscopic enemy that demanded a unified response — offered the nation a chance to come together. But from face masks to shutdowns, the pandemic quickly became the main thing Americans were fighting over.

As the death toll grew so did anxieties about who would win the presidency.

Election day arrives as the virus surges like never before, with an average of more than 80,000 new cases reported each day last week — well over previous spikes and up more than 44% from two weeks earlier.

Once concentrated in urban centers like New York and later in Sun Belt states, the virus is now ravaging the rural Midwest and Rocky Mountain states.

Field hospitals have been pitched in parking lots from Texas to Wisconsin. In the past week, hospitalizations reached new highs in 18 different states.

Treatment is improving and infections are increasingly concentrated in younger people with high odds of survival, but experts predict a significant rise in the U.S. death toll, which now tops 230,000.

The surge poses a dilemma for officials trying to balance health concerns with economic ones as the public grows wary of more forced shutdowns.

Polls suggest that most voters have made up their minds — and record numbers have already cast their ballots.

All of the issues that divided America before coronavirus have been eclipsed.

This is the pandemic election. And these are the stories of five voters.

The funeral home director The first call came in late March.

A 70-year-old had died shortly after being taken off a ventilator. Michelle Pitts sent a hearse to pick up his body from the hospital.

Michelle Pitts, owner of New Pitts Mortuary, stands outside her Milwaukee funeral home.

(Kurtis Lee / Los Angeles Times)

There would be no funeral, just a burial at the cemetery attended by three relatives. The family was too worried about contagion.

Pitts was left with the feeling that “this virus was going to be bad.”

The calls kept coming, at all hours. Pitts could only watch as the coronavirus spread through the neighborhood. As owner of the New Pitts Mortuary, she has been serving the predominantly Black northside of Milwaukee since the 1990s.

The disproportionate toll the virus was taking on Black people was obvious to her. The two dozen victims her funeral home has handled included bus drivers, nurses and grocery clerks — essential workers who didn’t have the luxury of sheltering in place.

“If you live in this community, you know someone who has either contracted the virus, or died,” she said. “It’s an American tragedy plain and simple.”

As the months wore on, Pitts couldn’t stop thinking about the ages of the deceased. Early 50s. Mid-40s. Late 30s.

She herself was 60.

Pitts remembered the expression of the parent standing over the oak casket of a beloved son, who days earlier was taken off a ventilator. She recalled the woman whose husband died before he could line up a life insurance policy to help take care of the couple’s two young children should something happen to him.

How are they doing now, she wondered?

To sustain herself, she often recited her favorite scripture, a section of Psalm 23: “Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff, they comfort me.”

In late October, she filled out her ballot.

There was never any doubt that she would vote for Biden. In her view Trump had only responded to the pandemic with callousness.

She deposited the ballot in a nearby drop box.

“I felt like a weight was kind of lifted off my shoulders,” she said. “As if it was my time to be heard.”

— Kurtis Lee

The survivor It had become her evening ritual: Order dinner from Doordash, mix a cocktail, draw a bath and pretend she was swimming in her complex’s off-limits pool.

“It just became very lonely,” said Jaime Vollmar, 35.

Meanwhile, her hours as an operating room technician at two plastic surgery clinics were severely cut.

It all seemed overblown to Vollmar. She knew friends who had contracted the coronavirus, but nobody who died from it.

Then, in early October, Vollmar and her boyfriend decided to take a risk and get together for dinner with another couple. The woman hosting began to feel ill that night, and within days called to tell Vollmar she and her husband had tested positive for the virus.

Vollmar also tested positive.

After two weeks of feeling “like death” at home, Vollmar was admitted to United Memorial Medical Center in Houston. During sleepless nights, she struggled to breathe as she watched a monitor showing her blood oxygen level drop.

She began to wonder: “Am I actually going to survive this?”

Her second priority was making it to the polls to vote in person.

She had supported Trump in 2016 and appreciated all he had done on immigration, the economy, even the pandemic.

“He did a great job. He’s human,” she said, adding that her bout with the virus “gives me more appreciation for him.”

Jamie Vollmar was admitted to United Memorial Medical Center in Houston after contracting COVID-19.

(Molly Hennessy-Fiske / Los Angeles Times)

Vollmar was released from the hospital Friday. At the polls, she plans to “be a dork” about safety and wear a mask, keep a distance of six feet and encourage others to take more precautions.

Looking back, Vollmar believes that she might have contracted the virus when she tasted the dinner host’s new vaping flavor — watermelon strawberry bubblegum.

“It was a heavenly flavor,” she said from her hospital bed. “But not worth all this.”

— Molly Hennessy-Fiske

The expectant father Marcos Sanchez was irked.

Driving by the local hardware store in the early days of the pandemic, he’d see lines of hundreds of people waiting to get in.

Yet Sanchez, a 35-year-old firearms instructor in Española, a small city tucked in the mountains of northern New Mexico, wasn’t allowed to work after an order from the state’s Democratic governor closed all businesses except those deemed essential.

Sanchez, who had been steadily growing his business for two years, had no income for three months straight.

“It’s frustrating because they’re raking in money and I’m struggling,” he said.

The way Sanchez sees it, the pandemic was an act of God. The shutdowns were an act of man.

Under current restrictions, he can work again, but must limit his shooting and self-defense classes to a quarter of normal capacity. With a second child on the way, he’s now contemplating whether his business can continue.

“I’m not blind or ignorant to the damage that the virus has done, but I see the damage it’s done economically and that leads to a whole lot of other problems,” he said.

Rio Arriba County, where Sanchez lives, went for Hillary Clinton in 2016 — 64% versus 24% for Trump. But Sanchez plans to vote for Trump, like he did four years ago.

His decision is largely based on his opposition to firearm restrictions and his religious beliefs, particularly his objection to abortion. But the pandemic has also played a role.

Trump is not a perfect candidate, he said. He thinks no candidate ever is. But most important for him are the kinds of policies a person will enact once they are in office, and Trump has opposed widespread economic shutdowns in the face of the virus.

“You have to ask what’s worse,” he said. “The virus or the constant anxiety we’ve been putting ourselves in?”

— Kate Linthicum

The activist Bill Whitmire had to leave for a doctor’s appointment, but his keys were nowhere to be found.

It’d been months since he felt clear-headed. Lapses in memory and reasoning — so uncharacteristic for a 56-year-old who prided himself on being organized — had become the norm.

He chalked it up to the coronavirus, which he believes he contracted back in January, before testing was available in the United States.

His wife, Ann, came down with the virus in June. She still faces bouts of nausea, body aches and feeling like she has no energy.

The pandemic brought the couple closer together — and not just in their shared suffering.

She is Republican and he is a Democrat, which seemed like less of an issue when they got married back in the 1980s than it did in 2016, when she voted for Trump and he went for Clinton.

“Sometimes we have to agree to disagree,” he said.

Whitmire kept an open mind about Trump in the beginning but grew increasingly disenchanted with him — especially after the pandemic struck.

As a former high school biology teacher, Whitmire was appalled by White House news conferences, in which Trump repeatedly contradicted his own health experts.

“He acts like he’s cured the virus: ‘We’ve rounded the corner, it’ll be over soon, live your life,’” Whitmire said. “Yeah, right.”

For the most part, Whitmire and his wife avoided conversations about Trump and kept focus on their common values of compassion and helping the less fortunate. But it was clear that Ann was losing faith in the president too.

Whenever her husband would turn on a presidential news conference, she would leave the room in disgust.

Anger and grief turned Whitmire into an activist. He joined Marked by COVID, a support group for people who have lost relatives or suffered other effects of the virus. On Friday at the Arizona state Capitol in Phoenix, he lit candles honoring victims and listened as a woman who survived — but lost her sister — sang a haunting rendition of “Amazing Grace.”

“I will never forget it,” he said.

Ann, still ailing, did not attend.

When they they both filled out their ballots in mid-October, he enthusiastically marked his for Biden.

She made him promise not to tell anyone who got her vote, only that it was not Trump.

— Richard Read

The militia member Michelle Gregoire stood guard outside Karl Manke’s Barber & Beauty Shop with a 9mm semiautomatic pistol and a flag emblazoned “Don’t tread on me.”

Manke had no intention of following state orders to close this past May as coronavirus infections were climbing. Gregoire and dozens of other members of a militia known as the Michigan Home Guard were there to keep out the authorities.

She had long been disillusioned with both major parties. But Trump’s outsider status and unusual political style had appeal.

She reluctantly voted from him in 2016, the same year she made a failed bid for a seat in the Michigan state house as a libertarian.

“I was scared when he took office,” said Gregoire, now 29.

That changed when she got a $16-per-hour job as a school bus driver, plus a bigger tax refund. She and her husband were saving to ditch their rental in Battle Creek to buy a house big enough for them and their three children.

Gregoire was growing more political. She decided to run for a state house seat again — this time as a Republican.

Last November, she joined the militia, which claims to have at least 1,000 members and says on its website that it is preparing “for tyranny, social discord, natural disasters or anything else that may arise.”

The pandemic only fortified her faith in Trump, whose downplaying of the virus reflected her own experience.

“I don’t social distance, I don’t wear a mask,” she explained. “If anybody has COVID, I should have COVID… Nobody around me has tested positive.”

Gregoire lost badly in the August primary for the house seat. She is still jobless, saying that she has not been allowed to return to driving school buses because she is facing charges of trespassing and resisting arrest stemming from her militia’s occupation of the state Capitol in Lansing for a week in May.

But she paid off mounting credit card bills using the $2,400 her family received in checks as part of the federal stimulus package, each accompanied by a letter signed by Trump.

She was planning to vote in-person because it feels more “patriotic.”

— Jaweed Kaleem

Read More

[granvarones]

Louie: So where did you grow up?

Freddy: I was born in West Covina, California and was raised by both my parents in La Puente, California but when my parents divorced my mom moved to Phoenix, Arizona, which is where I spend most of my time now. We moved to a somewhat rural town that has primarily Black and Latinx populations where the white people live in the nice neighborhoods and the people of color lived in the "other neighborhoods." I almost never interacted with white people. My classmates were always people of color with a sprinkle of white people every now and then. However, growing up here was a living hell.

Louie: How so?

Freddy: The first time I was ever bullied was in 5th grade when someone wrote "FAG" in one of my notebooks and it just got worse from there. At that point in my life I knew I was gay but just tried not to think about it and I was also pretty religious so I tried to "pray the gay away.” It didn’t work (lol). 7th grade was the worst year of my life because I was physically, emotionally, and psychologically bullied every single day that resulted in me switching schools. There was not one day where someone wouldn't call me a “fag” or try to fight me because I was "looking at their dick". They would also call me a cocksucker which I never really understood why they called me that because they were just stating a fact. My mom got worried when I came home crying one day from basically being assaulted and we went to the principal and he did absolutely nothing. It was a really dark time for me because even my friends at the time would tell me, "Just come out already" and at that point I just was not ready.

Louie: How did you sustain yourself during that time?

Freddy: I've always used humor to deflect my feelings and emotions so I would just laugh because it was all I could do. In high school it got better but people still would call me a fag and other annoying ass terms. I also dated girls, which blows my mind now but it was the easiest way to deflect rumors. I came out to my friends as bisexual my junior year and my senior year of high school but when I got my first boyfriend and I came out as gay. My friends weren’t surprised but were happy I was living my truth. I came out to my mom October of 2015, which is pretty recent, and while it didn't damage our relationship she doesn’t acknowledge my queerness but it'll take time and I know she'll get there.

Louie: Who was the first person you told actually told?

Freddy: My senior year of high school when I had my first boyfriend. I was so in love with him and because of him I realized that I was gay. I had dated girls before but being with a boy was just so different. I loved this boy, truly, and because of that I wanted to come out and tell everyone I was with him because for once in my life I was happy. One of the most important people in my life is my Grandma on my dad’s side and I decided to tell her first. She did not react the way I expected her to. She told me I was a disappointment to the family and that my family had high hopes for me and now they were gone. She also told me to keep it a secret forever and to never ever tell anyone else. It hurt. It hurt a lot. I cried for a while and told myself I was not going to tell anyone else until I graduated college and had a career. I didn’t talk to my grandma for a while and talked to her for the first time a couple months ago. I do want to have a relationship with her again but every time I see her, her words echo in the back of my head, so it’s a work in progress.

A couple months later I came out to my little brother because one: He is one of the most important people in my life and two: I wanted him to know so I could hookup with guys easier in my room. I told him in the car when I picked him up from school and I remember being so nervous and feeling my heart beat so fast. So I tell him “I’m gay" and he just looked at me and said "Yeah, that’s cool, can we go eat?" I was in shock because it was big secret and he just like curved it completely. Later on he told me he loved me and I lowkey cried because it was the first time a family member had said that. I always look back at that moment because I feel like that’s what coming out should be, not a big deal because I would've reacted the same way if my brother came out to me as straight.

Louie: Did you have any Latino gay men to look up to when you were growing up?

Freddy: I had absolutely zero gay Latino men to look up to. No one is gay in my family except for yours truly. It wasn't until a couple years ago that I found out that I did have a gay cousin but he was kicked out of the family for being gay so he moved to Spain. He reached out to me in 2013 and we talked for a bit but at that time I didn't know he was gay. Unfortunately, he died of AIDS complications a couple months after. I still wish I could have gotten to know him better.

Oddly enough even though my mom is a cis-heterosexual woman, she took a part in developing my queer identity because I felt like she always knew and lowkey supported it. My mom is a very religious woman from El Salvador who fled her home country because it was going through a violent civil war. She came to the States and married my dad but they divorced after 7 years and she raised me as a single mother. Growing up, she always took me shopping and I always helped her pick her outfits and she would always ask me for my opinion. She would always sit me down after her long work shifts and gossiped about her coworkers which I lived for because Latinx chisme is the absolute best. I also remember she would always tell me "Los hombres no sirven para nada" which basically is "men ain’t shit" and would warn me to be watchful of men. Which is why I now have IMPECCABLE fashion (not really), a big ol chismoso, and have always been watchful of the men that try to enter my life.

Louie: What did you think we as a community need to do to survive the next four years?

Freddy: There is so much we need to do as a community to survive the next four years. First we need to talk about anti-blackness in the Latinx community and start by talking to our racist ass family members who are contributing to the problem. The fact that we stay silent when our Tia'sbe saying racist shit is a problem. Also acknowledging our privilege for those of us who are citizens of the United States and stand up for the rights of undocumented immigrants. The easiest thing to do is to stop referring to immigrants as illegal because it paints them as criminals which contributes to this rhetoric that immigrants are dangerous when they're just trying to escape from their home countries that in most cases the US has fucked up. I'm also going to need gay men to stop with this obsession with performing masculinity and femme shaming because its toxic as fuck. I fucking hate it when guys ask me if I'm masc or femme and I’m just like “the fuck???” What does that even mean? Also destigmatize HIV and stop othering those who are HIV+ because it’s dehumanizing as fuck. I’ve heard some pretty ignorant shit about HIV and it’s something that we need to work on. We need to stand up for Trans women of color because the LGB+ community be forgetting that T especially when they are out here dying with a presidential administration who doesn't give a fuck about people of color and even less about the LGBT+ community and even less about our trans siblings. I mention all these problems in our community because in order to survive an oppressive, fascist, racist, misogynistic, homophobic, transphobic, xenophobic government, we have to be able to dismantle these in our own communities so we can come together to resist combat and survive the Trump Administration. We literally cannot afford to be silent any longer. This country hates my existence but my existence is also resisting and I am absolutely proud of being a Queer Ecuadorian/Salvadoran man living in a country that despises me. To survive these next four years, we just need to keep living, keep resisting, keep protesting, keep dismantling systems of oppression, keep holding our government accountable, keep being unapologetically Latinx and of course keep being unapologetically queer as fuck.

Freddy Christian Bernardino, Phoenix, AZ

Interviewed and photographed by: Louie A. Ortiz-Fonseca

[theconservativebrief]

The great mystery of the 2018 midterms is the undecided voter. Even in an era of hyper-polarized and historically divisive politics, as recently as last week, 10 percent or more of voters in critical House races said they don’t know which party’s candidate they’d vote for on Election Day.

Pollsters and electoral history tell us a lot about these undecided voters — they may not wind up voting, and if they do, they often don’t definitively break for one party or the other. Of the undecideds this year, they are more likely to be moderate or conservative, and the majority are women.

But polls can only tell us so much. So Vox reached out to about 30 undecided voters, recently identified as such by respectable pollsters, to ask them what they were thinking a week before Election Day and get a better sense of why they were feeling so unmoored in the current political climate.

We found voters who didn’t fit neatly into any boxes. They worry about health care and border security. They fear how angry the country seems to be, and they put plenty of the blame for that division on President Donald Trump.

One Arizona voter who highly prioritizes a progressive immigration policy wound up voting for the Green Party because the candidate she backed in the primary lost.

A member of the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints said he probably wouldn’t vote because: ”The government persecuted us on the basis of religion so I don’t have any use for them.”

A registered Republican in Colorado who voted for Trump has soured on the president because she worries about the country’s anger: “I don’t think he’s helpful. He’s not a unifier. I wish he was.”

One man in Nevada who didn’t vote in 2014 or 2016 is trying to reengage even as he feels hopeless about our politics: “We all go into this kind of as idiots.”

Here are brief portraits of 10 undecided voters. These interviews were condensed and edited for length and clarity.

Nordstrom is a registered Republican who lives in rural Fremont County, to the southwest of Colorado Springs. Trump won the county by 30 points in 2016. Nordstrom voted for him.

Besides “this health care mess” and border security, Nordstrom worries Congress has broken and become unable to fulfill its most routine duties.

But more than anything, she sounds anxious about the divisiveness in the country — and, even as a Republican, she blames Trump and conservative media for that division as much as she blames Democrats.

Why do you feel undecided?

The tenor of our nation is so hateful and ugly, and people are not nice anymore. They’re very open about spreading untruths about each other. It’s everywhere. You listen to the news, the ads come on, and it’s terrible. How do you find somebody who’s okay to vote for? The thing it’s created in me is a real sense of distrust.

How do you feel about President Trump?

He just doesn’t think. I think he wants to be a good person. I don’t know that he’s doing any good for our country. I voted for him. I thought that would be something good. I don’t even know that it’s him. We’ve got such huge problems.

But I don’t think he’s helpful. He’s not a unifier. I wish he was.

Where do you get your news?

I like the Wall Street Journal, but I can’t afford it. I listen to CBS, but they don’t like the president and a lot of their stuff is skewed. But they do give some information.

Fox News, I used to like them. But they’re part of tearing down our country, I think. They can get you all worked up about nothing, and it has nothing to do with anything.

Murray has lived in the suburbs of Richmond, Virginia, for 20 years. He’s always favored Republicans, but over the past six years he’s sensed himself shifting away from the party. And this year he’s not sure who he’s going to vote for.

Virginia’s Seventh Congressional District has been represented by Rep. Dave Brat (R-VA) since 2014, and has a strong conservative history. But this year, the congressional race is a total toss-up between Democrat Abigail Spanberger, a former CIA operative, and Brat, who rose to power in a stunning primary upset, ousting Eric Cantor.

Murray, who prioritizes jobs, doesn’t hear anyone talking about the issues he cares about — he just sees the mudslinging.

Why are you undecided?

I don’t like the ads. The ads seem to be trying to scare seniors for both parties and I don’t like that. It’s just an uncomfortable thing.

They are just trying to scare each other, by saying the other will cut Medicare, take medicine away from seniors. They’re just trying to scare people — and I don’t like that.

What’s the most important issue for you?

To me the most important issues are to keep everyone employed. Keep everyone working and making money. That’s really important to me. Nobody seems to talk about that at all.

Jessop, a small-business owner in Colorado City, Arizona, thinks the government went off the rails a long time ago, and he doesn’t see his vote changing things that much. He identifies himself as “independent from all others,” though he notes that he’s leaned Republican in the past.

Colorado City is part of the Fourth Congressional District, which covers an expansive western section of the state and is heavily Republican. It’s currently represented by Freedom Caucus member Rep. Paul Gosar and went for Trump by more than 39 points.

Jessop is a member of the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints — a religious sect that broke from the Mormon Church — and notes that much of his negative sentiment toward government stems from institutional efforts to seize the church’s land.

“The government persecuted us on the basis of religion so I don’t have any use for them,” he says. “When we can come back to the principles of religious freedom, then we can probably get somewhere.”

Why do you feel undecided?

Where did we lose the Constitution at? It’s gone. I don’t think that me voting is going to fix anything. I don’t think voting is going to fix anything for anybody.

How do you feel about President Trump?

You know, he’s done a lot of good things. I can’t say he’s done anything wrong as far as anything he’s done. The economy’s positive. He’s done a lot of good things there.

Why aren’t you planning to vote this cycle?

Because I have other things for my life to do.

Sharon Cortez is an independent from Phoenix who’s voted for both Republican Sen. John McCain and Democrat Hillary Clinton in the past. She notes that she leans Democratic but doesn’t really pick her candidates along party lines. Instead, her top two considerations are health care and veterans issues, given her husband’s five tours in Vietnam.

“My husband is 100 percent disabled from the military, so when they have a candidate talking about how they are going to react to medical issues, I listen to that real well, she says. “[Republican Rep. Martha] McSally seems to be a little less inclined to support military disabled and even people with preexisting conditions.”

While she was previously undecided on the Senate race, Cortez has already submitted her ballot for this year’s election. “I did not vote for anyone who endorsed Trump. I’m not a fan of his,” she says.

Why were you undecided?

I vote based on who it is that’s running and what I heard them say. And sometimes I don’t make up my mind until the last minute. I like to get the most knowledge I can and make my decision at the time.

What do you think of Trump?

I don’t like him. I don’t think he’s a very feeling man. I think he sees dollar signs and looks at how he can make more money. He’s not too interested in taking care of the country as much as he is in taking care of Trump.

What do you think of the Democratic and Republican Parties?

I don’t think that they’ve accomplished so much. I don’t think it’s necessarily because they are Republican or Democrat. They’re not working together for the betterment of the country. I think they’re too party-oriented.

McCain was more of an independent than straight party-line person. That’s the kind of person I like to see in office. I’m not interested in the ones that carry their Republican placard and their Democratic placard and they can’t see anything else.

Hart isn’t registered with either party and didn’t vote in 2016. He also didn’t vote in the 2014 midterms and remembers “not being interested” in politics that year.

He was previously undecided mostly because, he says, he hadn’t yet done his homework. But over the weekend, after educating himself, he went in to vote early and pulled the lever for Democrats.

What are the particular issues that are most important to you?

It’s hard to tell whether people are liars, but if people are bending their truths all the time, I think there is enough fact-checking out there where you can tell if a person does that or not.

We all go into this kind of as idiots. Some of us read as much as we can. It’s hard for me to really know whether the person will be able to technically execute their position. That’s I guess what I’m going for.

I probably lean toward socialist infrastructures. So somebody who’s overtly trying to burn down a social safety net, it’s hard for me to want to support that person.

How do you feel about the Democratic and Republican parties these days?

I feel hopeless. I’m trying to participate because I haven’t really been a big participator in my life. I’m trying to do a better job of engaging.

I have no idea what structures are going to persist, political and otherwise. There seems to be very, very intense crazy changes that are coming around to civilization, and I don’t know that any politicians are going to be able to navigate us through the waters.

Rodriguez, who lives in Surprise, Arizona, near Phoenix, is a diehard progressive Democrat in one of the reddest parts of Arizona, a dynamic that she’s well aware of. “In 2014, in my district, we didn’t have anybody in the Democratic side for most of what’s available,” she says.

This year, however, things are different. “We’re really excited in my district because we have a lot of progressive Democrats and this is the first time we’ve had Democrats in every box,” she says. Surprise is part of Arizona’s Eighth Congressional District, which backed Trump by 21 points.

Rodriguez wasn’t exactly undecided about many of her ballot picks, but she grappled with the Senate election for a bit after her candidate didn’t advance in the primary.

She is a huge proponent of immigrant rights and had mixed feelings about Rep. Kyrsten Sinema, the Democratic nominee who’s voted with Trump on several immigration bills. Rodriguez says she ultimately decided to go third-party.

What are some of your most important issues?

My top one is immigration because it affects my family on so many different issues. Number two is Medicare-for-all. I’m 100 percent for the Medicare-for-all bill and what they want to drop in Congress after the election. It would be extended to anybody who resides in the US regardless of their status. My third one is probably the education issue that’s going on here in Arizona.

What do you think of the Democratic and Republican Parties?

I feel like there are some good people in the Democratic Party but I feel like corporate America has taken over our government. I wish we had a third party that could be a contender in the race because I think it could reflect what the population wants.

Molina is a retired Republican veteran in Apache Junction, east of Phoenix, Arizona, and he’s had it with the negative campaign advertising and what he sees as “narcissistic” politicians on both sides of the aisle. Apache Junction is in the state’s firmly Republican Sixth Congressional District, which supported Trump by nearly 10 points.

Molina is fed up with both parties and says he took some time to land on a final decision for the Senate race, given his skepticism of how much one candidate can accomplish anyway.

“They can’t do anything by themselves. It doesn’t make any difference who’s up there,” he says.

How did you decide on who to vote for in the Senate race?

I didn’t vote for either one. I went for the Green Party. They cut each other so much. I wish they would just talk about themselves. The way I saw it, one is dirty and the other one is nasty.

Why do you vote?

I vote because it’s a public duty. It’s somewhat of a fallacy because we don’t vote for the people, we vote for the [Electoral] College. You vote for somebody and somebody else wins.

How do you feel about Trump?

I like him. The reason I like him is because they don’t like him. Because he’s not a cultured politician. He’s a businessman. And a businessman being a politician is like a mile runner trying to run and win a marathon.

George (who declined to provide his last name) is an independent voter who lives in Henderson, Nevada, one of Las Vegas’s biggest suburbs. He is a registered independent, who says he voted for George W. Bush, Barack Obama, and Hillary Clinton for president. He was previously undecided in the 2018 midterms, though he says he has since gone to polls and voted largely for Democrats.

While he likes to be bipartisan, George said he was breaking for the Democrats this year over two issues: guns and health care. Las Vegas was the site of the worst mass shooting in US history last year, and even as a gun owner, George worried America is too captive to the National Rifle Association.

Why were you feeling undecided and how did you make up your mind?

The closer we came to actually going and voting, not a lot was changing with the major issues like insurance and some form of gun control.

I have my own weapons, but I believe we need to put guns in the hands of good guys and have some type of testing to get it out of the hands of bad guys. We’re becoming governed by the NRA and gun manufacturers. Of course, we had the largest disaster in United States history right here in Nevada, and we’re still doing things the same old way.

What are the most important issues to you?

Health care is right up there, almost at the top of the list. The thing about it is, nobody from the conservative side is coming forth with a map. “We’re gonna do this, we’re gonna do this.” They’re saying nothing, which is very, very dangerous.

When Republicans start talking about potentially canceling the present insurance and giving you vouchers, that’s just a way for them to charge you for preexisting conditions and our country is gonna be in deep trouble if that happens.

Geiger, an independent, is Sen. Dean Heller (R-NV)’s worst nightmare. The last time Heller was up for reelection was 2012, and Geiger voted for him because he liked how bipartisan the Republican senator was.

But after Heller voted with Senate Republicans to overturn the Affordable Care Act, Geiger says he will not vote to reelect the senator. Health care is one of his most important issues — he’s on Medicaid and both of his parents are on Medicare and Social Security, two programs he’s afraid Republicans will try to gut. He doesn’t know a lot about Heller’s Democratic challenger Rep. Jacky Rosen, but he wants to send Heller a message; stand up to Trump and your party, or face the consequences.

“If he had gone up against Trump and voted against the health care bill that got beat by McCain, I would probably vote for Heller again,” Geiger told Vox.

Do you consider yourself undecided?

For the most part I’m probably going to go Democrat in this race. I try to be independent; you want to be a centrist, but both parties tend to go so far to the base that they’re not worried about the center. There are some things I’m conservative about, and there are some things I’m more liberal about. Right now, the way things are, especially with health insurance, I would have to stay with the Democratic side.

How have you voted in the past?

I almost voted for Trump, just because I thought that the House and Senate might go Democrat. But then I didn’t, which I’m glad I did not vote for him.

I don’t want to say he’s lied, but a lot of things he did say he was going to do, he hasn’t done. My mom was born in Juarez [Mexico]. I’m a first-generation immigrant, let alone a Mexican American, and he’s doing everything he can to keep Mexicans and Latin Americans out.

It seems like you are concerned about the Republican vote against the Affordable Care Act?

Not just that, I’m 50. My parents are retired, they use Social Security and Medicare. And not just them, it’s a nationwide thing that if Republicans get control and they try to get rid of Medicare and Social Security, I don’t think they realize what they’re doing to the nation.

Valtierra, a Democrat in Yuma, Arizona, says that social security and health care are her top issues, but notes that negative advertising drove her to vote for the Green Party candidate in the state’s Senate race.

Yuma is situated in Arizona’s Third Congressional District, a Democratic-leaning district that sits along the US border to Mexico and is currently represented by Democratic Rep. Raul Grijalva. Valtierra isn’t happy with Trump’s presidency, but she wasn’t particularly inspired by either Kyrsten Sinema or Martha McSally as a Senate option, either.

“I wanted to stay away from both of them because neither of them had good things to say for the elderly and social security,” she notes.

Who did you end up deciding on for the Senate race?

I didn’t vote for any of the popular ones. I voted for the Green Party. I didn’t like any of the two. I didn’t like McSally and I didn’t like the other one. I saw how bad the propaganda was for both of them.

What are your top issues?

I depend on Social Security a lot. I’m disabled and I’ve been on Medicare for many years.

My husband is wondering if Medicare will even be around when he’s due to receive it. We worked all our lives to receive it and they want to take it over.

What do you think of Trump?

I really think President Trump discriminates a lot against Mexican people. He’s voiced that we are like animals to him, we’re not even human beings to him. I feel really bad, he’s very racist. He doesn’t support people who have worked really hard and we do it for low pay, too.

Original Source -> 2018’s undecided voters, explained in their own words

via The Conservative Brief

[fesahaawit]

How One Bad Relationship Nearly Destroyed My Rags To Riches Story

[Welcome back from the holiday! Got a guest post for y’all today by Mrs. Mad Money Monster while I’m still stuck in slow down mode over here. She shares her story for us on relationships gone awry – both romantic and financial – but hey, at least she now gets some great blog posts out of it, eh? ;) Take it away MMM… Thanks for divulging!]

********

Have you ever considered how vastly different your life would be if you  made different decisions? It’s interesting to think that every single decision you have ever made has led to this exact moment in your life. A single choice has the power to change EVERYTHING.

Consider your career. What if you decided to choose a different major back when you were an 18-year old freshman starting college? What about the town you live in? Could you have easily found yourself in rural Ohio instead of sunny Arizona had you decided the lower-paying job offer was a better fit?

Interestingly, I can pin point the single decision I made that changed the entire course of my life. This poor decision of mine was choosing a wrong relationship that almost destroyed my rags to riches adventure. Almost…

********

And with that, let me tell you a story – a story that encompasses the reason I’m not already financially independent. A story that outlines a series of unfortunate events that derailed my financial future.

After college, I chose to enter into a romantic relationship with someone because he was fun and smart and had it together. But, I should’ve realized he wasn’t for me right away. Despite all the qualities I just listed, we had differing viewpoints on some of the big ticket items, one being Money. I failed to take into consideration the way he handled his or, more accurately, the way he didn’t handle his.

Therefore, this most fascinating failure story will focus on the importance of choosing your partner as it relates to your money. And trust me, the correlation is higher than you think!

The Right Side Of The Tracks

My 4th birthday in our trailer

I grew up as a poor kid on the right side of the tracks which lit a fire inside me. I wanted to be successful at LIFE. My parents didn’t have high school diplomas, let alone college degrees. They worked hard but they still struggled to pay the bills. We lived in a trailer that was 8′ wide by 50′ long. No joke.

I never went hungry or worried that our house wouldn’t be warm in the winter, but I always wanted more than to just Get By. To say I was tired of heating my bath water on the stove because we didn’t have a hot water heater would be an understatement. I wanted so much more out of my life. I wanted to be successful. Which in my young eyes meant a high-paying job and a big house. Full stop.

Fortunately, our tiny house was on the right side of the tracks. That meant I was in a top-notch school district, rubbing elbows with the kids that had more. A lot more. I wanted to grow up to be just like THEIR parents. There was just one problem – I had no idea how to get there.

From Rags To Riches…

Shortly after high school graduation, I stumbled across someone who helped me realize I could still go to college, despite never taking the SATs. I knew a college education would be my ticket to becoming successful, so I did whatever it took to get that degree.

I worked full-time, I paid cash for classes, I ate and slept in my car between work and school, and I studied non-stop. When I was working at the factory, you better believe I had my ear buds in listening to my lectures over and over and over again!

It worked. I got that degree, and I graduated with honors. Within 6 months of graduation, I had a stellar offer on the table from a global pharmaceutical company. Boom. I jumped at that offer and continued on my fabulous rags to riches adventure!

All The Right Moves

Not only did I snag that scientific degree and that high-paying job, I also started investing (heavily) for my financial future. I was making all the right moves. Until, I wasn’t. Enter one bad relationship decision and the commencement of my financial spiral.

I was out with my sister one night when I met him. We really hit it off and he made me laugh. I love to laugh. In case you weren’t aware of this, most girls are suckers for funny guys! I was hooked immediately and we started dating. We went out a few times, and then we went out a few more times. Before I knew it, we were in a full-fledged relationship. It just kinda happened.

The more time we spent together, however, the more I realized how different we were when it came to a lot of things. Particularly money. He was a spender – a flashy spender. I, on the other hand, was not. But no matter, we weren’t engaged or married. Our money was completely separate. Why should I care how he spends his money?

[NOTE: The reason I should’ve cared is because relationships that *just kinda happen* still stand a chance to lead to marriage and all that it entails!!]

Dining Out and Pool Parties

Fast forward 5 years and there we were spending money like fools. I was still saving and investing in my retirement accounts, but I had adopted his lax attitude when it came to spending. I was spending more and he was spending like crazy.

We were eating out almost every night and throwing extravagant parties to boot. Not only were we eating out and throwing parties, but we were also bank rolling our friends. It wasn’t uncommon for us to go out with two other couples and pick up the tab for everyone.

The worst part, even though I was enjoying myself and enjoying the life we had built together, I knew I wasn’t excited to marry him. And, I knew he felt the same way. Inertia took over. We had a house, we had pets, and we had a pool. What else could we ask for?

Unfortunately, the early progress I made on my rags to riches story had completely stalled because of our decision to keep going and going…

Ridiculous Things I Couldn’t Possibly Give up

This was our actual house – 2500 SF of suburban bliss.

He wasn’t a bad guy. We just weren’t on the same page. Hell, we weren’t even in the same book.

Even though I knew I was in a bad (for me) relationship and should have moved on, there were things I enjoyed that I wasn’t ready to give up. Hence, I stayed. Way too long.

Please enjoy this most ridiculous list of things I obviously valued more than my financial future!

The big house – Remember, I grew up poor, so this nice, big, suburban house did wonders for validating my self worth. *Eye roll*

Our friends – Most of the people we saw regularly were actually HIS friends. We all know friends take sides after a break up, and I knew that his friends wouldn’t take mine.

We had pets! – Yep. We had pets that I didn’t want to leave them. How absurd is that?

Holidays – One thing we had in common was making a big deal out of the holidays. We loved decorating like The Griswolds and having a kick-ass celebration for each and every holiday.

The pool – Have I mentioned the pool? Yeah, we had an in-ground pool to die for. We put it in and it ran us upwards of $70k to do so. Needless to say, our house was The Place to be every weekend. There was a standing invitation for all of our friends. We had a blast. Future? What future? We were living in the moment!

Lost Time

What I didn’t realize when I was enjoying our in-ground pool or nights out with our friends was that my most valuable asset was slipping away. My Time. And it was evaporating into the abyss.

I had worked my butt off to be the first one in my family to get a college degree and a high-paying, professional job. On top of those successes, I had also began investing and building wealth straight out of school. But there I was, counteracting all of the good I had accomplished by succumbing to inertia.

I didn’t want to uproot my life and start over with nothing. No big house. No in-ground pool. Nothing to validate what I had accomplished. That was the image of success I had been chasing since a child. I was living my dreams! Except my success was a facade. I was living a lie. That realization was the catalyst for my reboot.

My Financial Descent

My financial descent didn’t really take shape until I decided to leave the nearly 8-year relationship that stole most of my 20s and stretched into my early 30s.

By the time I couldn’t ignore our differences anymore and was forced to make a change, I was in a position where I was subsidizing my parents’ monthly expenses to the tune of about $800/month. Their trailer was falling apart and I willingly took on the responsibility of buying a house for them to move into.

Regardless of my financial obligations, though,  I still needed to follow through with the break up. I ended up moving out just before Christmas that year. I left with my clothes, 4 lawn chairs, and my 2 cats.

So there I was, starting from scratch at 31 years old. The exact age I had imaged I would be having children with a wonderful husband in a big house. I can’t tell you how depressed I was. And, I can’t begin to tell you how many times I sat in my stark apartment with my coat on that winter. I wasn’t sure I could afford to help my parents AND pay the electric bill if I cranked the heat up past 60 degrees! That was my new life.

But it gets better…

Please enjoy yet another ridiculous list of things I did to derail my finances in the wake of the break up:

I continued to help my parents – I continued to funnel about $800/month to my parents to help with their monthly expenses. This was “no big deal” when I was in the bad relationship. Unfortunately, it was a BIG deal when I was on my own.

I stopped contributing to my retirement accounts – Sadly, that’s not a typo. Up until that point, I had been contributing 15% of my income into my company’s 401(k) plan and maxing out a Roth IRA every year. This lull in contributions lasted a dreadful 5 years. That’s right, prime investing years in my 30s were wasted! I didn’t contribute a dime. Why? Because I needed the money for the apartment (see next bullet point). #Fool

I leased an apartment – I could’ve easily moved in with my parents. They would’ve been thrilled to have me. But I was an emotional mess, and I viewed moving in with my parents in my early 30s as the epitome of failure.

The Kicker – My parents were living in the rental house I bought for them; essentially, I would’ve been living in MY OWN house!

Playing Catch up

View of our pool from the second story deck.

Because it took me so long to move out and reboot my life, I’m not crafting this post from a stance of financial independence. Instead, I’m doing so late at night after working my full-time job and fulfilling all my obligations.

Why? Because I don’t have the option of choosing a different path – yet.

Why? Because I chose poorly when it came to a romantic relationship after college. On top of that, I allowed inertia to take over for nearly 8 years. I knew it was a wrong relationship for a LONG time and I allowed it to continue because I liked our friends and I liked living in our nice house. After all, we had an in-ground pool! Did I mention the pool???

Success Comes In Many Forms

Not surprisingly, it took me a long time to figure out that success comes in many different forms. I now know that the size of your house has nothing to do with the size of your net worth or your overall success. I also realize how important time is. Wasting a single day living a life that you don’t value is a day you can never get back.

There are no do-overs.

I lost nearly a decade of crucial investing years because I was too busy partying it up to realize that my life and financial future were slipping away.

Thankfully, I got my act together, but not before turning 30. And after that, it took me quite a few years of emotional maintenance and self care before I found the right man. We’ve been married for a few years now and we’re completely aligned on money. You better believe I made sure of it!

We’re back to blazing our own trail towards financial independence. Of course, I could have already been there had I realized how important choosing the right partner was, but oh well. You live and learn. I’ll still get there – it’ll just be in a few years, as opposed to being a few years ago.

The Danger of Inertia

No one is perfect, and that means that everyone makes poor decisions that affect their financial future. The difference between failure and success comes down to how quickly we recognize our poor decisions, and how quickly we take the steps to correct them.

Delaying action is the danger of inertia. It can literally cost you a fortune!

Anyone else working through a comeback story? :)

******* Lisa is a mother, scientist, and financial enthusiast. She founded��Mad Money Monster, a personal finance blog chronicling her and her family’s journey from doing money all wrong to doing it all right. She and her husband are known as Mr. & Mrs. Mad Money Monster on the site. They pride themselves as being Gen-Xers who have turned it all around and are now charting a course towards financial independence. Their goal is to inspire others just like them to take control of their financial future and realize it’s not too late! Sign up to their blog and follow along here.

Enjoy these types of stories? Check out this financial confessional next: “We Used to Blow Our Money on Motorcycles & Airplanes”

How One Bad Relationship Nearly Destroyed My Rags To Riches Story posted first on http://ift.tt/2lnwIdQ

[heliosfinance]

How One Bad Relationship Nearly Destroyed My Rags To Riches Story

[Welcome back from the holiday! Got a guest post for y’all today by Mrs. Mad Money Monster while I’m still stuck in slow down mode over here. She shares her story for us on relationships gone awry – both romantic and financial – but hey, at least she now gets some great blog posts out of it, eh? ;) Take it away MMM… Thanks for divulging!]

********

Have you ever considered how vastly different your life would be if you  made different decisions? It’s interesting to think that every single decision you have ever made has led to this exact moment in your life. A single choice has the power to change EVERYTHING.

Consider your career. What if you decided to choose a different major back when you were an 18-year old freshman starting college? What about the town you live in? Could you have easily found yourself in rural Ohio instead of sunny Arizona had you decided the lower-paying job offer was a better fit?

Interestingly, I can pin point the single decision I made that changed the entire course of my life. This poor decision of mine was choosing a wrong relationship that almost destroyed my rags to riches adventure. Almost…

********

And with that, let me tell you a story – a story that encompasses the reason I’m not already financially independent. A story that outlines a series of unfortunate events that derailed my financial future.

After college, I chose to enter into a romantic relationship with someone because he was fun and smart and had it together. But, I should’ve realized he wasn’t for me right away. Despite all the qualities I just listed, we had differing viewpoints on some of the big ticket items, one being Money. I failed to take into consideration the way he handled his or, more accurately, the way he didn’t handle his.

Therefore, this most fascinating failure story will focus on the importance of choosing your partner as it relates to your money. And trust me, the correlation is higher than you think!

The Right Side Of The Tracks

My 4th birthday in our trailer

I grew up as a poor kid on the right side of the tracks which lit a fire inside me. I wanted to be successful at LIFE. My parents didn’t have high school diplomas, let alone college degrees. They worked hard but they still struggled to pay the bills. We lived in a trailer that was 8′ wide by 50′ long. No joke.

I never went hungry or worried that our house wouldn’t be warm in the winter, but I always wanted more than to just Get By. To say I was tired of heating my bath water on the stove because we didn’t have a hot water heater would be an understatement. I wanted so much more out of my life. I wanted to be successful. Which in my young eyes meant a high-paying job and a big house. Full stop.

Fortunately, our tiny house was on the right side of the tracks. That meant I was in a top-notch school district, rubbing elbows with the kids that had more. A lot more. I wanted to grow up to be just like THEIR parents. There was just one problem – I had no idea how to get there.

From Rags To Riches…

Shortly after high school graduation, I stumbled across someone who helped me realize I could still go to college, despite never taking the SATs. I knew a college education would be my ticket to becoming successful, so I did whatever it took to get that degree.

I worked full-time, I paid cash for classes, I ate and slept in my car between work and school, and I studied non-stop. When I was working at the factory, you better believe I had my ear buds in listening to my lectures over and over and over again!

It worked. I got that degree, and I graduated with honors. Within 6 months of graduation, I had a stellar offer on the table from a global pharmaceutical company. Boom. I jumped at that offer and continued on my fabulous rags to riches adventure!

All The Right Moves

Not only did I snag that scientific degree and that high-paying job, I also started investing (heavily) for my financial future. I was making all the right moves. Until, I wasn’t. Enter one bad relationship decision and the commencement of my financial spiral.

I was out with my sister one night when I met him. We really hit it off and he made me laugh. I love to laugh. In case you weren’t aware of this, most girls are suckers for funny guys! I was hooked immediately and we started dating. We went out a few times, and then we went out a few more times. Before I knew it, we were in a full-fledged relationship. It just kinda happened.

The more time we spent together, however, the more I realized how different we were when it came to a lot of things. Particularly money. He was a spender – a flashy spender. I, on the other hand, was not. But no matter, we weren’t engaged or married. Our money was completely separate. Why should I care how he spends his money?

[NOTE: The reason I should’ve cared is because relationships that *just kinda happen* still stand a chance to lead to marriage and all that it entails!!]

Dining Out and Pool Parties

Fast forward 5 years and there we were spending money like fools. I was still saving and investing in my retirement accounts, but I had adopted his lax attitude when it came to spending. I was spending more and he was spending like crazy.

We were eating out almost every night and throwing extravagant parties to boot. Not only were we eating out and throwing parties, but we were also bank rolling our friends. It wasn’t uncommon for us to go out with two other couples and pick up the tab for everyone.

The worst part, even though I was enjoying myself and enjoying the life we had built together, I knew I wasn’t excited to marry him. And, I knew he felt the same way. Inertia took over. We had a house, we had pets, and we had a pool. What else could we ask for?

Unfortunately, the early progress I made on my rags to riches story had completely stalled because of our decision to keep going and going…

Ridiculous Things I Couldn’t Possibly Give up

This was our actual house – 2500 SF of suburban bliss.

He wasn’t a bad guy. We just weren’t on the same page. Hell, we weren’t even in the same book.

Even though I knew I was in a bad (for me) relationship and should have moved on, there were things I enjoyed that I wasn’t ready to give up. Hence, I stayed. Way too long.

Please enjoy this most ridiculous list of things I obviously valued more than my financial future!

The big house – Remember, I grew up poor, so this nice, big, suburban house did wonders for validating my self worth. *Eye roll*

Our friends – Most of the people we saw regularly were actually HIS friends. We all know friends take sides after a break up, and I knew that his friends wouldn’t take mine.

We had pets! – Yep. We had pets that I didn’t want to leave them. How absurd is that?

Holidays – One thing we had in common was making a big deal out of the holidays. We loved decorating like The Griswolds and having a kick-ass celebration for each and every holiday.

The pool – Have I mentioned the pool? Yeah, we had an in-ground pool to die for. We put it in and it ran us upwards of $70k to do so. Needless to say, our house was The Place to be every weekend. There was a standing invitation for all of our friends. We had a blast. Future? What future? We were living in the moment!

Lost Time

What I didn’t realize when I was enjoying our in-ground pool or nights out with our friends was that my most valuable asset was slipping away. My Time. And it was evaporating into the abyss.

I had worked my butt off to be the first one in my family to get a college degree and a high-paying, professional job. On top of those successes, I had also began investing and building wealth straight out of school. But there I was, counteracting all of the good I had accomplished by succumbing to inertia.

I didn’t want to uproot my life and start over with nothing. No big house. No in-ground pool. Nothing to validate what I had accomplished. That was the image of success I had been chasing since a child. I was living my dreams! Except my success was a facade. I was living a lie. That realization was the catalyst for my reboot.

My Financial Descent

My financial descent didn’t really take shape until I decided to leave the nearly 8-year relationship that stole most of my 20s and stretched into my early 30s.

By the time I couldn’t ignore our differences anymore and was forced to make a change, I was in a position where I was subsidizing my parents’ monthly expenses to the tune of about $800/month. Their trailer was falling apart and I willingly took on the responsibility of buying a house for them to move into.

Regardless of my financial obligations, though,  I still needed to follow through with the break up. I ended up moving out just before Christmas that year. I left with my clothes, 4 lawn chairs, and my 2 cats.

So there I was, starting from scratch at 31 years old. The exact age I had imaged I would be having children with a wonderful husband in a big house. I can’t tell you how depressed I was. And, I can’t begin to tell you how many times I sat in my stark apartment with my coat on that winter. I wasn’t sure I could afford to help my parents AND pay the electric bill if I cranked the heat up past 60 degrees! That was my new life.

But it gets better…

Please enjoy yet another ridiculous list of things I did to derail my finances in the wake of the break up:

I continued to help my parents – I continued to funnel about $800/month to my parents to help with their monthly expenses. This was “no big deal” when I was in the bad relationship. Unfortunately, it was a BIG deal when I was on my own.

I stopped contributing to my retirement accounts – Sadly, that’s not a typo. Up until that point, I had been contributing 15% of my income into my company’s 401(k) plan and maxing out a Roth IRA every year. This lull in contributions lasted a dreadful 5 years. That’s right, prime investing years in my 30s were wasted! I didn’t contribute a dime. Why? Because I needed the money for the apartment (see next bullet point). #Fool

I leased an apartment – I could’ve easily moved in with my parents. They would’ve been thrilled to have me. But I was an emotional mess, and I viewed moving in with my parents in my early 30s as the epitome of failure.

The Kicker – My parents were living in the rental house I bought for them; essentially, I would’ve been living in MY OWN house!

Playing Catch up

View of our pool from the second story deck.

Because it took me so long to move out and reboot my life, I’m not crafting this post from a stance of financial independence. Instead, I’m doing so late at night after working my full-time job and fulfilling all my obligations.

Why? Because I don’t have the option of choosing a different path – yet.

Why? Because I chose poorly when it came to a romantic relationship after college. On top of that, I allowed inertia to take over for nearly 8 years. I knew it was a wrong relationship for a LONG time and I allowed it to continue because I liked our friends and I liked living in our nice house. After all, we had an in-ground pool! Did I mention the pool???

Success Comes In Many Forms

Not surprisingly, it took me a long time to figure out that success comes in many different forms. I now know that the size of your house has nothing to do with the size of your net worth or your overall success. I also realize how important time is. Wasting a single day living a life that you don’t value is a day you can never get back.

There are no do-overs.

I lost nearly a decade of crucial investing years because I was too busy partying it up to realize that my life and financial future were slipping away.

Thankfully, I got my act together, but not before turning 30. And after that, it took me quite a few years of emotional maintenance and self care before I found the right man. We’ve been married for a few years now and we’re completely aligned on money. You better believe I made sure of it!

We’re back to blazing our own trail towards financial independence. Of course, I could have already been there had I realized how important choosing the right partner was, but oh well. You live and learn. I’ll still get there – it’ll just be in a few years, as opposed to being a few years ago.

The Danger of Inertia

No one is perfect, and that means that everyone makes poor decisions that affect their financial future. The difference between failure and success comes down to how quickly we recognize our poor decisions, and how quickly we take the steps to correct them.

Delaying action is the danger of inertia. It can literally cost you a fortune!

Anyone else working through a comeback story? :)

******* Lisa is a mother, scientist, and financial enthusiast. She founded Mad Money Monster, a personal finance blog chronicling her and her family’s journey from doing money all wrong to doing it all right. She and her husband are known as Mr. & Mrs. Mad Money Monster on the site. They pride themselves as being Gen-Xers who have turned it all around and are now charting a course towards financial independence. Their goal is to inspire others just like them to take control of their financial future and realize it’s not too late! Sign up to their blog and follow along here.

Enjoy these types of stories? Check out this financial confessional next: “We Used to Blow Our Money on Motorcycles & Airplanes”

How One Bad Relationship Nearly Destroyed My Rags To Riches Story published first on http://ift.tt/2ljLF4B

[theconservativebrief]

The great mystery of the 2018 midterms is the undecided voter. Even in an era of hyper-polarized and historically divisive politics, as recently as last week, 10 percent or more of voters in critical House races said they don’t know which party’s candidate they’d vote for on Election Day.

Pollsters and electoral history tell us a lot about these undecided voters — they may not wind up voting, and if they do, they often don’t definitively break for one party or the other. Of the undecideds this year, they are more likely to be moderate or conservative, and the majority are women.

But polls can only tell us so much. So Vox reached out to about 30 undecided voters, recently identified as such by respectable pollsters, to ask them what they were thinking a week before Election Day and get a better sense of why they were feeling so unmoored in the current political climate.

We found voters who didn’t fit neatly into any boxes. They worry about health care and border security. They fear how angry the country seems to be, and they put plenty of the blame for that division on President Donald Trump.

One Arizona voter who highly prioritizes a progressive immigration policy wound up voting for the Green Party because the candidate she backed in the primary lost.

A member of the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints said he probably wouldn’t vote because: ”The government persecuted us on the basis of religion so I don’t have any use for them.”

A registered Republican in Colorado who voted for Trump has soured on the president because she worries about the country’s anger: “I don’t think he’s helpful. He’s not a unifier. I wish he was.”

One man in Nevada who didn’t vote in 2014 or 2016 is trying to reengage even as he feels hopeless about our politics: “We all go into this kind of as idiots.”

Here are brief portraits of 10 undecided voters. These interviews were condensed and edited for length and clarity.

Nordstrom is a registered Republican who lives in rural Fremont County, to the southwest of Colorado Springs. Trump won the county by 30 points in 2016. Nordstrom voted for him.

Besides “this health care mess” and border security, Nordstrom worries Congress has broken and become unable to fulfill its most routine duties.

But more than anything, she sounds anxious about the divisiveness in the country — and, even as a Republican, she blames Trump and conservative media for that division as much as she blames Democrats.

Why do you feel undecided?

The tenor of our nation is so hateful and ugly, and people are not nice anymore. They’re very open about spreading untruths about each other. It’s everywhere. You listen to the news, the ads come on, and it’s terrible. How do you find somebody who’s okay to vote for? The thing it’s created in me is a real sense of distrust.

How do you feel about President Trump?

He just doesn’t think. I think he wants to be a good person. I don’t know that he’s doing any good for our country. I voted for him. I thought that would be something good. I don’t even know that it’s him. We’ve got such huge problems.

But I don’t think he’s helpful. He’s not a unifier. I wish he was.

Where do you get your news?

I like the Wall Street Journal, but I can’t afford it. I listen to CBS, but they don’t like the president and a lot of their stuff is skewed. But they do give some information.

Fox News, I used to like them. But they’re part of tearing down our country, I think. They can get you all worked up about nothing, and it has nothing to do with anything.

Murray has lived in the suburbs of Richmond, Virginia, for 20 years. He’s always favored Republicans, but over the past six years he’s sensed himself shifting away from the party. And this year he’s not sure who he’s going to vote for.

Virginia’s Seventh Congressional District has been represented by Rep. Dave Brat (R-VA) since 2014, and has a strong conservative history. But this year, the congressional race is a total toss-up between Democrat Abigail Spanberger, a former CIA operative, and Brat, who rose to power in a stunning primary upset, ousting Eric Cantor.

Murray, who prioritizes jobs, doesn’t hear anyone talking about the issues he cares about — he just sees the mudslinging.

Why are you undecided?

I don’t like the ads. The ads seem to be trying to scare seniors for both parties and I don’t like that. It’s just an uncomfortable thing.

They are just trying to scare each other, by saying the other will cut Medicare, take medicine away from seniors. They’re just trying to scare people — and I don’t like that.

What’s the most important issue for you?

To me the most important issues are to keep everyone employed. Keep everyone working and making money. That’s really important to me. Nobody seems to talk about that at all.

Jessop, a small-business owner in Colorado City, Arizona, thinks the government went off the rails a long time ago, and he doesn’t see his vote changing things that much. He identifies himself as “independent from all others,” though he notes that he’s leaned Republican in the past.

Colorado City is part of the Fourth Congressional District, which covers an expansive western section of the state and is heavily Republican. It’s currently represented by Freedom Caucus member Rep. Paul Gosar and went for Trump by more than 39 points.

Jessop is a member of the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints — a religious sect that broke from the Mormon Church — and notes that much of his negative sentiment toward government stems from institutional efforts to seize the church’s land.

“The government persecuted us on the basis of religion so I don’t have any use for them,” he says. “When we can come back to the principles of religious freedom, then we can probably get somewhere.”

Why do you feel undecided?

Where did we lose the Constitution at? It’s gone. I don’t think that me voting is going to fix anything. I don’t think voting is going to fix anything for anybody.

How do you feel about President Trump?

You know, he’s done a lot of good things. I can’t say he’s done anything wrong as far as anything he’s done. The economy’s positive. He’s done a lot of good things there.

Why aren’t you planning to vote this cycle?

Because I have other things for my life to do.

Sharon Cortez is an independent from Phoenix who’s voted for both Republican Sen. John McCain and Democrat Hillary Clinton in the past. She notes that she leans Democratic but doesn’t really pick her candidates along party lines. Instead, her top two considerations are health care and veterans issues, given her husband’s five tours in Vietnam.

“My husband is 100 percent disabled from the military, so when they have a candidate talking about how they are going to react to medical issues, I listen to that real well, she says. “[Republican Rep. Martha] McSally seems to be a little less inclined to support military disabled and even people with preexisting conditions.”

While she was previously undecided on the Senate race, Cortez has already submitted her ballot for this year’s election. “I did not vote for anyone who endorsed Trump. I’m not a fan of his,” she says.

Why were you undecided?

I vote based on who it is that’s running and what I heard them say. And sometimes I don’t make up my mind until the last minute. I like to get the most knowledge I can and make my decision at the time.

What do you think of Trump?

I don’t like him. I don’t think he’s a very feeling man. I think he sees dollar signs and looks at how he can make more money. He’s not too interested in taking care of the country as much as he is in taking care of Trump.

What do you think of the Democratic and Republican Parties?

I don’t think that they’ve accomplished so much. I don’t think it’s necessarily because they are Republican or Democrat. They’re not working together for the betterment of the country. I think they’re too party-oriented.

McCain was more of an independent than straight party-line person. That’s the kind of person I like to see in office. I’m not interested in the ones that carry their Republican placard and their Democratic placard and they can’t see anything else.

Hart isn’t registered with either party and didn’t vote in 2016. He also didn’t vote in the 2014 midterms and remembers “not being interested” in politics that year.

He was previously undecided mostly because, he says, he hadn’t yet done his homework. But over the weekend, after educating himself, he went in to vote early and pulled the lever for Democrats.

What are the particular issues that are most important to you?

It’s hard to tell whether people are liars, but if people are bending their truths all the time, I think there is enough fact-checking out there where you can tell if a person does that or not.

We all go into this kind of as idiots. Some of us read as much as we can. It’s hard for me to really know whether the person will be able to technically execute their position. That’s I guess what I’m going for.

I probably lean toward socialist infrastructures. So somebody who’s overtly trying to burn down a social safety net, it’s hard for me to want to support that person.

How do you feel about the Democratic and Republican parties these days?

I feel hopeless. I’m trying to participate because I haven’t really been a big participator in my life. I’m trying to do a better job of engaging.

I have no idea what structures are going to persist, political and otherwise. There seems to be very, very intense crazy changes that are coming around to civilization, and I don’t know that any politicians are going to be able to navigate us through the waters.

Rodriguez, who lives in Surprise, Arizona, near Phoenix, is a diehard progressive Democrat in one of the reddest parts of Arizona, a dynamic that she’s well aware of. “In 2014, in my district, we didn’t have anybody in the Democratic side for most of what’s available,” she says.

This year, however, things are different. “We’re really excited in my district because we have a lot of progressive Democrats and this is the first time we’ve had Democrats in every box,” she says. Surprise is part of Arizona’s Eighth Congressional District, which backed Trump by 21 points.

Rodriguez wasn’t exactly undecided about many of her ballot picks, but she grappled with the Senate election for a bit after her candidate didn’t advance in the primary.

She is a huge proponent of immigrant rights and had mixed feelings about Rep. Kyrsten Sinema, the Democratic nominee who’s voted with Trump on several immigration bills. Rodriguez says she ultimately decided to go third-party.

What are some of your most important issues?

My top one is immigration because it affects my family on so many different issues. Number two is Medicare-for-all. I’m 100 percent for the Medicare-for-all bill and what they want to drop in Congress after the election. It would be extended to anybody who resides in the US regardless of their status. My third one is probably the education issue that’s going on here in Arizona.

What do you think of the Democratic and Republican Parties?

I feel like there are some good people in the Democratic Party but I feel like corporate America has taken over our government. I wish we had a third party that could be a contender in the race because I think it could reflect what the population wants.

Molina is a retired Republican veteran in Apache Junction, east of Phoenix, Arizona, and he’s had it with the negative campaign advertising and what he sees as “narcissistic” politicians on both sides of the aisle. Apache Junction is in the state’s firmly Republican Sixth Congressional District, which supported Trump by nearly 10 points.

Molina is fed up with both parties and says he took some time to land on a final decision for the Senate race, given his skepticism of how much one candidate can accomplish anyway.

“They can’t do anything by themselves. It doesn’t make any difference who’s up there,” he says.

How did you decide on who to vote for in the Senate race?

I didn’t vote for either one. I went for the Green Party. They cut each other so much. I wish they would just talk about themselves. The way I saw it, one is dirty and the other one is nasty.

Why do you vote?

I vote because it’s a public duty. It’s somewhat of a fallacy because we don’t vote for the people, we vote for the [Electoral] College. You vote for somebody and somebody else wins.

How do you feel about Trump?

I like him. The reason I like him is because they don’t like him. Because he’s not a cultured politician. He’s a businessman. And a businessman being a politician is like a mile runner trying to run and win a marathon.

George (who declined to provide his last name) is an independent voter who lives in Henderson, Nevada, one of Las Vegas’s biggest suburbs. He is a registered independent, who says he voted for George W. Bush, Barack Obama, and Hillary Clinton for president. He was previously undecided in the 2018 midterms, though he says he has since gone to polls and voted largely for Democrats.

While he likes to be bipartisan, George said he was breaking for the Democrats this year over two issues: guns and health care. Las Vegas was the site of the worst mass shooting in US history last year, and even as a gun owner, George worried America is too captive to the National Rifle Association.

Why were you feeling undecided and how did you make up your mind?

The closer we came to actually going and voting, not a lot was changing with the major issues like insurance and some form of gun control.

I have my own weapons, but I believe we need to put guns in the hands of good guys and have some type of testing to get it out of the hands of bad guys. We’re becoming governed by the NRA and gun manufacturers. Of course, we had the largest disaster in United States history right here in Nevada, and we’re still doing things the same old way.

What are the most important issues to you?

Health care is right up there, almost at the top of the list. The thing about it is, nobody from the conservative side is coming forth with a map. “We’re gonna do this, we’re gonna do this.” They’re saying nothing, which is very, very dangerous.

When Republicans start talking about potentially canceling the present insurance and giving you vouchers, that’s just a way for them to charge you for preexisting conditions and our country is gonna be in deep trouble if that happens.

Geiger, an independent, is Sen. Dean Heller (R-NV)’s worst nightmare. The last time Heller was up for reelection was 2012, and Geiger voted for him because he liked how bipartisan the Republican senator was.

But after Heller voted with Senate Republicans to overturn the Affordable Care Act, Geiger says he will not vote to reelect the senator. Health care is one of his most important issues — he’s on Medicaid and both of his parents are on Medicare and Social Security, two programs he’s afraid Republicans will try to gut. He doesn’t know a lot about Heller’s Democratic challenger Rep. Jacky Rosen, but he wants to send Heller a message; stand up to Trump and your party, or face the consequences.

“If he had gone up against Trump and voted against the health care bill that got beat by McCain, I would probably vote for Heller again,” Geiger told Vox.

Do you consider yourself undecided?

For the most part I’m probably going to go Democrat in this race. I try to be independent; you want to be a centrist, but both parties tend to go so far to the base that they’re not worried about the center. There are some things I’m conservative about, and there are some things I’m more liberal about. Right now, the way things are, especially with health insurance, I would have to stay with the Democratic side.

How have you voted in the past?

I almost voted for Trump, just because I thought that the House and Senate might go Democrat. But then I didn’t, which I’m glad I did not vote for him.

I don’t want to say he’s lied, but a lot of things he did say he was going to do, he hasn’t done. My mom was born in Juarez [Mexico]. I’m a first-generation immigrant, let alone a Mexican American, and he’s doing everything he can to keep Mexicans and Latin Americans out.

It seems like you are concerned about the Republican vote against the Affordable Care Act?

Not just that, I’m 50. My parents are retired, they use Social Security and Medicare. And not just them, it’s a nationwide thing that if Republicans get control and they try to get rid of Medicare and Social Security, I don’t think they realize what they’re doing to the nation.

Valtierra, a Democrat in Yuma, Arizona, says that social security and health care are her top issues, but notes that negative advertising drove her to vote for the Green Party candidate in the state’s Senate race.

Yuma is situated in Arizona’s Third Congressional District, a Democratic-leaning district that sits along the US border to Mexico and is currently represented by Democratic Rep. Raul Grijalva. Valtierra isn’t happy with Trump’s presidency, but she wasn’t particularly inspired by either Kyrsten Sinema or Martha McSally as a Senate option, either.

“I wanted to stay away from both of them because neither of them had good things to say for the elderly and social security,” she notes.

Who did you end up deciding on for the Senate race?

I didn’t vote for any of the popular ones. I voted for the Green Party. I didn’t like any of the two. I didn’t like McSally and I didn’t like the other one. I saw how bad the propaganda was for both of them.

What are your top issues?

I depend on Social Security a lot. I’m disabled and I’ve been on Medicare for many years.

My husband is wondering if Medicare will even be around when he’s due to receive it. We worked all our lives to receive it and they want to take it over.

What do you think of Trump?

I really think President Trump discriminates a lot against Mexican people. He’s voiced that we are like animals to him, we’re not even human beings to him. I feel really bad, he’s very racist. He doesn’t support people who have worked really hard and we do it for low pay, too.

Original Source -> 2018’s undecided voters, explained in their own words

via The Conservative Brief