#I remember back as a kid a teacher was like doing student interviews

[desktopmermaid]

I’m not a lesbian but I wanted to say that your art is some of the most awesome and beautiful and cool ever. It’s been so cool seeing you flip the bird to gender norms and create characters that feel so genuinely truthfully human. Keep up the amazing work 💖

Awwwww, this is such a warm thoughtful message, I’ve been rereading it a lot this morning. 🥺 thank you so much!! 😭 I’m so glad they come across that way! I rly hope for my ocs to come across as very genuinely themselves and just ppl living their lives, so I’m glad you can feel that!! Thank you sm and I hope U have a lovely day!

[ruminativevagrant]

An assortment of facts about Adam Lanza

Adam's low self image issues began showing during elementary school. he would write the words "loser" and "ugly" on his hands, believed that "everyone else in the world deserved more than he did”, and would hit himself as punishment when he thought he made a mistake. He would sometimes come home with bruises that he would refuse to explain, and Nancy almost sued SHES because she thought he was being beaten by other students.

One of Adam's middle school creative writing assignments got rejected for depicting violence, and he was made to write a poem instead. this poem was apparently so beautiful that it made his father cry.

Adam wanted to be a hamster for halloween as a kid, but they couldn't find hamster costumes, so nancy made one for him.

Ryan remembers Adam being a lot closer with his father as a child. Adam and Peter would routinely spend hours playing with legos in the basement, making up stories and games.

Adam developed an interest in political and economic theory early on and used to be very talkative about these subjects, as Peter recalls: "man, that kid, you couldn't shut him up!"

When Adam was sixteen, he made a meme of Karl Marx (huge beard), Lenin (small beard), Stalin (mustache), and Mao (clean-shaven), with the caption, “Comrades, we must rectify the faltering facial hair standards.” and Peter thought it was so funny that he got T-shirts made of it.

Adam carried a black briefcase instead of a backpack in high school. To avoid other people in the halls he would either turn to walk in the opposite direction, or press up against the wall and clutch his briefcase to himself "like an 8 year old who refuses to give up his teddy bear". He was described by his highschool advisor as "a very scared young boy" and by classmates as being quiet but extremely intelligent, "he was the smartest person I knew, he was probably a genius"

Adam would constantly express his anxiety to his mother, that he felt frightened and unsafe both in public and at home. Nancy told psychiatrists that his fear was so severe that it physically paralyzed him. When being interviewed by psychiatric professionals, Adam sweat through his shirt and was holding back tears throughout the sessions.

One time Peter had mentioned to Nancy that Adam had stopped to tie his shoes when they had been hiking, and Nancy expressed surprise and bewilderment to this.

Adam would have panic attacks in middle school that were so severe that he had to be sent home. In high school these were replaced with "crises" he would have in class, where he would be overwhelmed with hopelessness, give up whatever he was doing and "shut down".

Adam's teacher were advised to keep an eye on him because he "couldn't feel pain", as Nancy had informed them that he might not stop doing something even if it's hurting him.

Peter recalls that as Adam entered his teenage years he would often state how much he missed being a little kid.

Adam routinely checked and compared weather conditions across the country, he wanted to live in Washington because it was the most overcast state and Nancy entertained the idea of them moving to seattle together.

After Adam stopped talking to Peter in 2010, whenever Nancy brought the topic of his father up to Adam he would begin crying profusely and withdraw.

Adam once told a friend that he was "bulky" when he was a child, and that he had fat cheeks, comparing himself to a hamster with its cheeks stuffed.

Adam would sometimes play ddr for up to 10 hours straight, where he would enter what was described as a "trance". Workers at the Danbury theater recall him being unresponsive at closing time, and they would have to unplug the machine in order to get him to stop.

Adam identified as asexual but denounced the label towards the end of his life, claiming to be confused about his sexuality. On a university application form asking for a gender marker, Adam wrote "I choose not to answer".

Adam wanted to own not only hamsters, but also mice. He specifically wanted a brown deer mouse and a white fancy mouse. He would routinely watch youtube videos pertaining to rodents and rodent care, and would give advice in the comments.

One of Adam's top favorite movies was Willard, a movie about an isolated young man who lives in a large house with his mother and befriend rats. In this movie his mother dies in her bed, and the story culminated with him using the rats to enact revenge on an authoritative boss, killing him. Adam also owned a copy of the book that the movie is based on.

[baekguuuuu]

Better Than Revenge

Characters: Baekhyun x Reader

Genre: Romance, Fluff, Smut, Angst

Word Count: 20.1k (im sorry i tried to make it short but it just happened ><)

Summary: All those years you are convinced that you only like the same gender. However, you decided to start anew after ending a long-term unhealthy relationship, not expecting to meet new people and him.

I should have seen it coming. 

For almost nine years, I let myself turn a blind eye to what was bound to happen. 

There’s nothing wrong with loving someone of the same sex.  

My parents had assured me that when I started dating this girl I met during my first year in university.  

I’m an only child.  

As a kid, I was my dad’s princess and my mom’s precious daughter.  

I grew up in a very loving family. My dad is a cardiologist, and my mom is an elementary music teacher. Both are nearing retirement but still doing their best in their career. 

My parents met when they were in middle school. You know, the cliché, my dad made fun of my mom to hide his little crush on her. When high school came, my dad finally gathered all his courage to ask my mom to be his girlfriend. 

My dad is a gentle, loving man. Since I was a kid, I’ve seen his effort to show love to my mom despite his busy schedule at the hospital. He’s never absent on anniversaries and birthdays; he never once missed holidays and family reunions.  

I remember my friends in middle school told me how their parents would always yell and fight with each other almost every night. They were surprised when I told them how my parents treated each other. 

“They’re probably just not showing it in front of you,” one of my so-called friends scoffed, rolling her eyes bitterly. 

I was a child and asked my mom when I got home that night. “Mom, do you and Dad ever fight?” 

My mom, she’s the sweetest person I’ve ever known. There’s a reason why she had been teaching for the longest time, and her students—those mischievous children, love her.  

She smiled gently, caressing the apple of my cheek with her thumb, “Of course, honey. But instead of screaming from the top of our lungs to each other, we would always choose to sit down and talk, remind each other why your dad asked to marry me and why I said yes. Sometimes, we would even recite our vows from our wedding day. I love your dad, and I will always choose to love him over anything. And, of course, we—your dad and I love you very much, my baby. You will always be our treasure.” 

I wanted that kind of love. 

I keep telling that to myself until the end of high school. The boys hated me so much for declining their invitation for a simple date or even saying no to a party that my parents even gave me permission to attend.  

In my mind, I was looking for someone who would treat me like how my dad treats my mom. But living in a different generation from my parents, the boys back in high school were all about sliding your panties down your legs, and after that, see ya! 

When I met Yunjin, I didn’t expect a romance would spark. It was a friendly encounter, then hanging out after lectures to study dates. Until the day Yunjin confessed that she was attracted to me and wanted to ask me for a date. 

I was a nervous wreck. I didn’t know what to do or what to say.  

But I agreed. And it made me happy. 

She made me happy. 

Until she didn’t. 

You see, after university, Yunjin convinced me to apply to a huge international corporation for which she had wanted to work forever. We submitted our CVs, and we were called for an interview. 

I didn’t want to go, honestly speaking. I originally wanted to work for a government institution, but I had no choice; otherwise, it would become another silent treatment I’m somewhat used to. 

I got accepted, but she didn’t. 

And it all started going down since then. 

I endured disrespect, dishonesty, and manipulation for the rest of our relationship because I love her as a partner and as a person. 

She had been talking shit behind my back to our mutual friends, saying that I’d been arrogant since getting accepted to her dream company. She had been making me feel like garbage every time we were together, would purposely ignore me whenever I was talking or would humiliate me in public instead of lecturing me in private. 

I was twenty-one when I started working in the company that began every downfall of our relationship. 

I’m already twenty-seven—turning twenty-eight, and it took me nearly seven years to realize that enough is enough. 

The last straw was when I found out that she had been unfaithful for quite some time.  

Her phone was left unattended, and it rang when a call came in. She hated it whenever I’d go near her personal belongings, especially her phone, so I didn’t pick it up. But as soon the device stopped ringing, another call would come in. 

I answered it, and it came to my knowledge that she had been seeing another woman from her workplace. 

When I confronted her about it, instead of apologizing, she almost made it seem like she had prepared a presentation of what I had done wrong and what I could’ve done better. 

“How come this became my fault?” my voice cracked as a salty stream of tears escaped my eyes. I was seated on the couch in the living room of our shared apartment while I watched her pack her belongings.  

Yunjin continues shoving her clothes into the duffle bag I got her last Christmas. She scoffs, zipping the bag and slinging the strap to her shoulders while her other hand grabs her old suitcase. “If you weren’t so conceited and would always shove into my face that you have a better career, salary, and status in life, I probably would have stayed with you. But no, you’ve done this, you’ve done that. Your family doesn’t even like me—” 

“Why do you always have to bring my family to every argument?” I get up from the couch and walk in her direction, thinking I would have understood her point better if I had stood close to her. 

Yunjin sighs my name, dropping the duffel bag from her shoulder. Her hands rub her face tiredly before facing me with an exhausted face. “We’re two individuals who came from different worlds, okay? You don’t even have a student loan because your father could pay for your tuition without sweat. While I had to work twelve hours a day to buy food still while I pay off my debt.” 

I shake my head, smiling bitterly. My bottom lip trembled, and I had to bite it to hide my vulnerability. My body is shaking from anger; at the same time, I want to bawl my eyes out, scream on the rooftop, and punch a mirror so the pain would be diverted to my fist instead of my aching heart. 

“Just go,” my energy is on its limit. I’m beyond exhausted, and I just want to be alone at this point. The thin thread that I’ve been holding on to for years has finally given up, and my palm is bleeding for holding on to it for so long. 

She left, and I cried the whole night. 

I cried for the years that I lost being with someone who didn’t see my worth and who didn’t appreciate who I am and what I achieved in life. 

I cried for days, weeks, months.  

Until I couldn’t anymore. 

When I decided to move back to my parents’ house, I had never seen them so delighted for the longest time.  

I do not understand Yunjin’s sentiments about my parents. They’ve been nothing but nice to her. They even offered to help her get a job when she didn’t get accepted to the company she wanted, and they even offered to help us with the deposit when we decided to get a place of our own. 

My mom had always wanted a grandchild; she does, but she has never spoken about it out loud. Too considerate that she might offend us. I heard about it from my aunt, who loves to gossip here and there. 

I also want it, especially with someone I see my future with. 

When I asked Yunjin if we should consider adopting a child of our own or opting for IVF, she laughed at my face, saying that I was ridiculous for even wanting a child. 

“You know you’ll lose your freedom with a kid on board, right?” 

I also quit my job as it reminds me how Yunjin would always say that I’m conceited because I got in, and if it weren’t for her recommendation to apply, I wouldn’t be where I am. When my high school friends heard the news, they all called me and comforted me. However, one suggested, “You need to get the things you’ve given her. Take it all back! We need to revenge what she did to you.” 

Another one even suggested, “Make a TikTok on how she cheated on you. We’ll make it viral, and she would lose everything.” 

Although thankful for their thoughtfulness, I decided to deactivate all my social media accounts and spend time healing.  

When the third month came, I searched the internet for a job, preferably with a much smaller group of people. And I’m glad I found a posting three days ago looking for a Mobile app Developer. I read the company’s background and was thrilled to see it was a startup company. 

“Why did you decide to leave your previous job?”  

Since it’s a startup company built just two years ago, HR warned me that the final interview would be with its founder.  

“He’s meticulous,” they said, more like a whisper, though the tone of their voice was more on the playful side. 

Kim Junmyeon. That’s his name written on the nameplate on his desk. 

My lips stretched into a polite smile, patting myself on the back for rehearsing in case I get asked this question. I want nothing but to be honest. “I’ve been there for seven years, and I can say that I contributed many ideas and showcased my skillset to the company. However, I had to take time off and focus on my well-being for personal reasons. But now that all is well, I’m confident I can return to work and optimistically deliver my potential to this company.” 

Kim Junmyeon looks at me momentarily before nodding his head, though his brows are still furrowed, as if he’s still unconvinced by my answer. “But why not apply for a much larger company than us? Their salary range would be way higher than ours. Don’t get me wrong, but your resumé is impressive, and not that I doubt my business, but why here?” 

I clear my throat, straightening my posture before rubbing my palm on my pencil skirt. “Do you mind if I’d be honest?” 

“Please,” his response is quick as if he’s been waiting for me to say those words. 

“It’s not about the compensation,” I start, sighing as I remember the stress I experienced from working in a larger corporation. “I’m looking for a place to work where I can be excited to get up from bed and drive to work. Not worry about being on top but just enjoying where I’d be while doing what I could. And I see potential in your company. Not only in economic growth but also in providing employees with a healthy environment while paying their dues.” 

The founder’s eyes are on me, unmoving a muscle as he stares at my face, studying my expression while I talk. When I receive no response from him, I continue, “Am I wrong?” 

My heart felt like it would jump out of my chest any minute, and I couldn’t be more thankful when his brows finally relaxed. He leaned on his chair, sighed, and finally smiled.  

“There’s only one way to find out, right?” 

Back in my previous job, we were supposed to always show up at the office in business attire; it didn’t matter what department you are from, everyone needs to follow the policy. 

I couldn’t be more surprised when I walked into the office, noticing that most of the employees are wearing jeans and sneakers; while I’m dressed in a dress shirt and tight skirt, I’m even wearing a pumps heel. 

Jessi, the team leader for the Marketing department, eyes me from head to toe with a judging look. We just met ten minutes ago when HR endorsed me to her team for the time being while they actively acquire other Developers to join the company. 

“Girl, who died?” 

Nayeon, one of Jessi’s team members, gasps, “Jessi, that’s not a nice thing to say!” 

Instead of feeling humiliated, like when Yunjin would say things like this, I laugh, shaking my head as I shrug my shoulders. “I didn’t get the memo that I can wear pajamas at work.” 

Jessi snorts, clapping her hands at my remark. “You can be nude, and one of the executives will be more than happy to welcome you.” 

Throughout the day, I did nothing but chat with Jessi and her team. They are all nice and welcoming, though a bit sarcastic. I learned a lot about the company and its policies, and I know that HR might have missed disclosing information when I signed the job offer. 

The company is on a first-name basis; it was not like we are not allowed to address upper management formally, but it was said that they prefer to be called by their first name.  

So, should I call the founder Junmyeon? Just Junmyeon? 

I shiver when Jessi tells me to be comfortable with the executives; they are nice people who care about their employees’ well-being. 

Back at my previous job, I remember stopping in the hallway and bowing my head until it reached my stomach every time I’d pass by a boss. 

“Girl, just be comfortable,” Jessi pats my shoulder before throwing her laptop inside her bag and grabbing her keys when the clock hasn’t hit exactly five in the afternoon. It’s still 4:58. 

When she notices my baffled expression, she gives me a pitiful look, caressing my face with her thumb, and it didn’t fail to make my heart thump inside my chest. “You’re so precious and fragile. Come to Mama when someone here makes you cry, alright?” 

Jessi walks out of the operational floor laughing when she realizes how hard I am blushing just hearing her words. 

Nayeon, who sits across my workstation, shakes her head and starts packing her things. Her smile shines bright when she turned to look at me. I suck in my breath while I wait for whatever she’s going to say. 

Gosh, why is everyone so freaking gorgeous here? 

“We have flexibility regarding our work schedule,” Nayeon explains, standing up from the ergonomic chair and waving the other team members goodbye. “As long as you’re done with your task for the day, you can go home or whatever. If you notice, we don’t need a badge to log in and out for the day. The company hired us because they trust us.” 

I’m the last one to leave my table. Everyone in Jessi’s team came to my cubicle to say goodbye and tell me to take care of myself on the way home. 

I’m in shock—in utter shock. Is this what they call a culture shock? It's a good thing, though. I even had to slap my cheek to see if I’m dreaming, but when the stinging pain on the right side of my face seemed real, my chest suddenly feels light, and my eyes brim with happy tears. 

When I wrap my things up, I glance at the place I’d be working, hopefully for a long time. I want to see myself contributing to this company and building relationships with the awesome people I’ve met so far. 

While waiting for the elevator, I look down at my outfit, take a mental note to clutter my office attire somewhere else and opt for more casual clothes once I get home.  

I can’t help but bounce on my feet in excitement once I get home and tell my parents how work was today. I feel like a kid whose parents are waiting at home for their child to tell them how school was for the day. 

When the elevator dings, I look up from the floor and am greeted by a young-looking male who looks like he’s been sleep-deprived for days. I bow my head and smile at him as I step inside the lift. My index finger lifts to press the basement parking but lets out a soft oh when it’s already lightened up. 

I gave the man a tight smile when I realized he’d watched my every movement. My eyes are locked on the small screen atop the elevator, watching the number of floors decrease by each second.  

“Are you a new hire?” a velvety voice rings through my ear, making the hair on the back of my neck stand up.  

With my eyes wide open, I shift my eyes away from the screen and turn my head to look at him with the gentlest smile I could ever give a person. “Yes, sir.” 

When he made a face from hearing me say, sir, I pursed my lips, closing my eyes for a second before uttering an apology. However, he just chuckled huskily while shaking his head.  

I heave a deep sigh, turning my head to look away from him and face upfront. I didn’t even notice that I was holding my breath for the rest of the elevator ride until I stepped out of the box.  

My hand fishes out my car keys from my bag and was about to turn on my heels to the left side of the parking space when the man from the elevator cleared his throat to catch my attention.  

“Welcome to the company,” he smiles, raising his left hand as if to greet me from afar, and walks away. 

The interaction was so quick that I didn’t even get a chance to say thanks or raise my hand as a greeting, but I did the latter on his back as I watched him unlock a sleek black vehicle with four rings aligned horizontally on the grille. Damn. 

It’s finally Friday. Don’t get me wrong. I’m having the time of my work life here, but I still need a break. I will spend the rest of the weekend at home in my pajamas and binge-watch a new series on Netflix.  

When the clock hits three in the afternoon, surprise is an understatement when everyone cheered from their seat and went to the Zen area of the office.  

Jessi, who seems to be my trainer when it comes to things I should know about here, closed my laptop without permission and asked me to stand up from my chair, and when I did, she hooked her arms with mine and dragged me to where everyone was hurrying to. 

I’m in awe when the Zen area is rearranged with tables, drinks, and food. Everyone converses happily while holding a glass of champagne, while the others have wine. 

“This, my child, is what we call a Happy Hour,” Jessi tightened her hold on my arms while her other hand slowly moved from left to right to educate me about their culture here, exaggeratedly—her words, not mine. 

We are listening to Jessi’s rant about her Tinder date last weekend when everyone notices Junmyeon walking in the area. I could feel Jessi’s eyes on me while she waited for me to bow my head off out of reflex, but I scrunched my nose at her when I didn’t. 

When Junmyeon walks over to our table to greet Jessi’s team, I notice someone walking behind him. It was the man from the elevator on my first day in here. 

He looks neater than when I saw him last time. His dress shirt is unbuttoned until he reaches his chest, showing his prominent collarbone and the skin of his chest. His hair has been brushed up, showcasing his clear forehead. 

“Ah, Baekhyun!” Jessi hollers, slapping the table with her palm as the two men reach our table. “You finally decided to take a shower, huh?” 

The man from the elevator, whom Jessi addressed as Baekhyun, laughs, snatching Jessi’s glass of wine to take a huge sip. “I finally paid the utility bill yesterday, so the water’s back.” Everyone from Jessi’s team laughs, even Junmyeon, who sat in front of me.  

“Oh, she’s the new hire!” I tense in my spot when Baekhyun sits on the empty chair beside me. Nayeon just walked out to the toilet, and he quickly moved to occupy her spot. Junmyeon rolls his eyes, shaking his head at Baekhyun’s unnecessary enthusiasm.  

Nonetheless, I plastered a kind smile, nodding to confirm his statement. “I am the new hire, yes.” 

Baekhyun raises his brow, and the corner of his lips quirks as he stares intently at my orbs. “No, sir?” 

I almost choked on my saliva, the event from high school when boys would blatantly flirt with me flashing right before my eyes. I laugh awkwardly, my foot under the table, blindly nudging Jessi’s shoes to ask for help. 

My attraction to the opposite sex is nearly nonexistent. I would feel awkward until I gathered the courage to let them know my preference. 

I heard Jessi sigh, and I turned my head to look at her like a clueless sheep. “Just ignore him.” 

“Hey, that’s not nice!” Baekhyun complains, his voice turning to a whine.  

“Baekhyun, can you not flirt with every female in this company, please?” Junmyeon interrupts, though the tone of his voice is gentle and kind. 

“Excuse me? I do not flirt with every female in this company. You guys are making me look like I’m a total perv.” 

“You are a perv, Baekhyun. Stop fooling yourself.” Jessi deadpans, and I saw how everyone subtly agreed. 

Baekhyun huffs, crossing his arms on his chest. “You guys, I thought we’re all friends here, yet here you are, ruining my moment.” 

I decided to ignore him, just like Jessi’s advice and turn my focus back to her disastrous Tinder date. However, every time Baekhyun tried to start a conversation, I would still respond politely, but with a lack of interest, to send a message that I did not want to associate myself with his thoughts. 

It has come to my knowledge that the company would have a Happy Hour every other Friday where drinks and food would be available from three in the afternoon until five.  

“We’re into work and life balance here,” Nayeon giggles, a bit tipsy, when I asked her why a company would serve an alcoholic beverage to its employee when they were supposed to work their asses off. 

Weeks have passed, and I’m getting used to the company’s culture. I started to enjoy getting out of bed and running a bit before preparing to get to work.  

My parents even noticed the improvement in my mental and physical health. I’ve literally stopped crying and would meet people on weekends instead of locking myself inside their homes. 

I also became much closer to Jessi and her team, especially Nayeon, who I found out is a few years younger than .e, and this is her first job, so I decided to stay rather than look for a larger opportunity. 

Junmyeon, the founder of the company, is a very hands-on man. He would have to walk to each department every other day to talk to the team and ask them for any concerns he should know about and any feedback an employee might have. 

I also found out that Baekhyun, that playful man when he’s not behind his laptop, is the executive director of the company. Built the company beside Junmyeon and is two years older than me. He’s single and loves to play computer games in his free time.  

How do I know all of these? 

Well, he’d magically appear at Jessi’s team meeting whenever he’d have a chance to inspect and get an insight into the Marketing team’s status. Those were his excuses when Jessi tried to kick him out. And since I’m not actually part of Marketing, I would idle at the corner of the meeting room, and he’d sit beside me as he rambles while doodling on his iPad. 

I feel sorry for judging him during my first Happy Hour experience. Baekhyun is a nice guy. A good person, a funny one. He’s comical—and yes, flirtatious, but when it comes to work, he takes every detail seriously.  

“Do you work out?” Baekhyun suddenly asks when I bump into him in the elevator when I’m done for the day.  

I shrug my shoulders, stretching my neck from side to side, totally spent from working the whole day. “I run every other morning, but I used to go to the gym when I was younger.” 

Baekhyun’s laughter booms inside the lift, and it is so loud that I swear the elevator shook a little. “You talk like you’re already in your sixties.” 

“Well, it feels like it.” 

I couldn’t stop the smile that was slowly spreading on my lips when Baekhyun was unable to stop laughing; he even slapped my shoulder and arm, though not forcefully. 

When we got out of the elevator, I realized that he was walking to where I parked my car. I looked at him to silently ask what he was doing, but when he fished out his car key from the pocket of his pants and pressed the unlock button, the vehicle beside mine lit up—indicating that it had been unlocked. 

I roll my eyes at him, shaking my head. I open the driver seat side, and before going in, I peek over my shoulder to give him a playful judging look. “Do you really need to park beside me?” 

Baekhyun shrugs, crossing his arms on his chest leaning the side of his body on his car. “What can I say? I’m a clingy guy.” He even ended his sentence with a wink while biting his bottom lip. 

Knowing how playful he can be, I pretend to stick my index finger down my throat to induce a vomit. 

His laugh echoed around the basement, and before he got inside his car, he called my name. “Do you want to know why I ask if you work out?” 

“Why?” 

“Because I’ve never seen an ass look that good when you wore that tight pencil skirt on your first day.” 

I gasped loudly, stomping my feet to hit him or even had a thought of pulling his hair out of his scalp, but before I could reach his spot, he immediately opened his car and locked the door, sticking his tongue out when I tried to open it, slamming my fist on his window. 

He drove off, leaving me all flustered in the empty basement parking. 

When Baekhyun realized that I do not get offended by his advances—many provocative advances, I must say, he started texting me on weekends, asking me about random stuff, or sometimes even asking me to meet up. 

Where the hell did you get my personal mobile number? Sent | 9:48 PM 

Omg, did Jessi give it to you? Sent | 9:48 PM 

Ah, no. She’ll chuck you in the head before you even ask for it. Sent | 9:49 PM 

I can’t believe that I’m sitting on my bed, grabbing the remote control to pause Netflix just to respond to this guy. 

Haha! Received | 9:51 PM 

I may or may not have sneaked into your resumé. Received | 9:51 PM 

You look hot in your photo in there. Received | 9:52 PM 

I couldn’t help but scoff at his last text message, though a smile was forming in my mouth. My fingers are quick to type a reply. 

Sometimes, I get scared of what goes on in your mind. Sent | 9:58 PM 

Do you need anything, by the way? Sent | 9:59 PM 

Let me know before I go to sleep. Sent | 9:59 PM 

His reply came in an instant. It’s like he’d been waiting for me to ask, and he’s already typed his answer. 

You, baby. Received | 9:59 PM 

I left him on read, jumping from my bed to take a cold shower—too bothered by his response and by the way he addressed me. This is the first time he has called me differently than my name. 

The next morning, I was awoken by the birds chirping outside my window. I tap on my phone and see that it’s already 8:30 in the morning. I turned off the Do Not Disturb feature, and several messages appeared in the notification. 

I’m hurt that you left me on read. Received | 10:30 PM 

Are you still there? Received | 10:48 PM 

Are you that old to sleep this early? Received | 11:05 PM 

I’m going to call you grandma starting today. Received | 11:10 PM 

I think you really have gone to bed. Received | 11:25 PM 

Good night, baby. Dream of me. Received | 11:27 PM 

Oh, sorry. Received | 11:27 PM 

Good night, Grandma. Received | 11:28 PM 

I snicker upon reading his messages that I slept on. At the same time, my mom knocked on my door before peeking inside when I told her to come in.  

“I made pancakes, darling.” she smiled, knowing how much I love her pancakes and seeing me excitedly jump off my bed to run downstairs. 

Throughout the day, I helped with house chores since my dad had to go to work, and my mom needed to prepare a lesson plan for her homeroom class. I didn’t have a chance to check my phone for notifications as I deactivated my social media, and my friends haven’t contacted me since. I prefer not to work on weekends. Also, there was some advice from Jessi and Junmyeon to stay away from work-related things during the weekend. 

I had an early supper with my parents and had to take the two rescued dogs my mom adopted from the shelter to walk before I was done for the day. 

I groan when my back touches the fluffy duvet on my bed. I stared at the ceiling for a few minutes before unlocking my phone and was honestly surprised to see tons of messages from Baekhyun.  

“Oh, shit,” I cursed under my breath when I realized that I forgot to reply to his last message and left him on read again. Even though he annoys me on a day-to-day basis, he’s someone who doesn’t deserve to be disregarded when he’s done nothing wrong. 

I scrolled through his texts, and most of them were just whining and complaining about why I was not responding to him.  

Are you really that busy on Sunday? Received | 11:18 AM 

I’m starting to think that you really are a grandma who has nine children and forty grandchildren. Received | 3:10 PM 

His last message was sent twenty minutes ago. 

Can I call you? Received | 8:10 PM 

Without thinking further, I tap on the call icon and place my phone on my right ear as I wait for him to answer the call. 

Instead of the normal hello when someone answers a phone call, I received a gasp then, “Grandma knows how to make phone calls now!” 

I shake my head, laughing softly, before I sigh and plop my head on the pillow. “I was busy the whole day, sorry. What’s up?” 

“My dick.” he sniggers on the other line—he should be thankful that he did not just say that in front of me, else I’ll probably slap the shit out of him. 

I purposely yawn for him to hear, shuffling on my bed to lie on my side. “Your dick is like my patience—short.” 

I could hear the sheets from his line, and he was probably on his bed as well. “You did not!” 

“I just did,” I smirk even though he can’t see it, it’s still satisfying. 

“Do you want me to send you a picture to prove that he’s not small?” he challenges, and I’m surprised that he actually sounds offended. “Because I will.” 

“Baekhyun—” I hiss, sitting up on my bed and rubbing my temple, just thinking that he might really send a picture of his shaft. “Do not freaking send a picture of your penis to me, please. I’m going to screenshot your message; if you do, print it on an A4 paper, laminate it, and send it to Junmyeon. I swear, I will.” 

“Okay, that was a good threat.” Baekhyun laughs it off, and I’m glad that he just moved on from the topic so quickly. “Sorry, I was bored the whole day. I don’t have any schedule, and I honestly wanted to talk to you.” 

“Seriously, Baekhyun. Why don’t you just play your game or something? I thought you love gaming and stuff.” 

I stopped rubbing my eyes with my fingers when he didn’t respond to what I just said like he always does. He stays silent on the other line for approximately more than fifteen seconds, and I had to confirm if he’s still there. “Hello? Did the line get disconnected?” 

But when I heard him clear his throat and take a sharp breath, I knew that he had heard what I had just said. He’s probably just tired; that’s what I thought. 

“Y-yeah, I’m still here.” 

“Oh, alright. Well, you’re probably tired and—” 

“No, no! I’m not tired or sleepy. I’m just—” 

“Just?” I press on, getting bothered by how the Byun Baekhyun everyone knows at the company is stuttering and at a loss for words. 

“That’s the thing, baby.”  

Once again, I tense upon hearing the pet name he’s been addressing me by since last night.  

“I would normally ignore all calls and texts when I’m playing—even from my own mother, but I’ve been pausing the game the whole day to check if you texted me back or even read my texts.” 

It took me a few seconds before I comprehended the meaning behind his words. My eyes widened on their own, my saliva was caught in my throat, and I couldn’t find my voice to speak and respond to him. 

“Baekhyun, I—” 

“Please don’t say no—please don’t.” he cut me off, his voice loud as he spoke. “I’m trying to figure things out. I’m trying, okay? I really am. I—this is new to me. So, please... don’t say no for now.” 

I didn’t know what to say or how I would break into him if I swung for the same team. He sounds so sincere that I do not have the heart to crush his soul, especially not on a Sunday night.  

“O-okay...” was all I could say. 

I believe that made him satisfied as he’s back from his usual chirpy self and continued complaining about how I should handle my messages as they could be important. 

“What could be so important that I need to drop everything and answer my phone?” I snort, my hand reaching to my nightstand to turn off the light so the darkness can lull me to sleep. 

“Me, of course.” 

Jessi has warned me, not really warn, but informed me that Baekhyun is a huge flirt and I should just ignore him as he is known to woo every single new hire in the company. I heard stories from every department as well that Baekhyun was too friendly to them when they first joined the company. 

But this was before he started getting too close to me. I didn’t mind because he is kind and considerate despite the fact that he would annoy the shit out of me every single time he’d get a chance. I could see him as a friend. 

I thought that he’s just playing around, that the stories I’ve been hearing are a hundred percent true, and he would move on to the next new hire once he met her. 

But boy, did my heart flutter when Jessi has a new member added to her team as a Brand Associate, and I’m already expecting Baekhyun to make the same move he had done to me when he suddenly appeared at Jessi’s corner with an iced latte in his hand and placed it on my table without any funny business but a soft good morning and a pat on my head before walking away, not even glancing to the new hire. 

Ever since I switched workstations with the new hire, whose name is Miyeon, my gossip buddy, Jessi, has had to send me a message via MS Teams instead. Hence, it didn’t come as a surprise that a notification ding chimes from my laptop as soon as Baekhyun walks out of sight. 

Jessica Ho | 9:03 AM: What the actual fuck just happened? 

I just responded with a laughing GIF, not knowing how or what to reply to her message. Because I, myself, am astounded as fuck. 

A little over two months after I joined the company, I got accustomed to seeing Baekhyun in the elevator after work so we could go down to the basement parking together—it was like he knew what time I usually finished my tasks, so when the elevator arrived, and he was not there, I was utterly dumbfounded. 

Where are you? Sent | 5:01 PM 

Is everything okay? Sent | 5:12 PM 

I sit inside my car as I stare at the sleek black vehicle parked beside mine. I waited for another thirty minutes to see if he’d respond to my messages or would appear in his car, but neither happened. Therefore, I decided to just drive home. 

We’ve known each other not too long ago, but I can’t help but feel worried about his whereabouts when he would normally pop up like a mushroom literally anywhere.  

However, I don’t want to pry on it too much.  

Not that we are just friends, but Yunjin used to yell nasty things when I would ask where she was or what time she’d be home—I’m scared that Baekhyun might do the same. 

Would it be too annoying? Should I delete my messages before he can see them? 

I flip my bag upside down so the contents would scatter on my bed as I hastily look for my phone. I decided that it’s better to just delete the messages, just because. 

When I see the unread messages I ignored while I was driving, my heart starts to thump loudly in my chest. Did he find it annoying? Would he ask me to stop texting him without any reason? 

Shit, baby, I’m sorry! Received | 5:48 PM 

I was in an extended meeting. The stakeholders needed my input, so I couldn’t check my phone. Are you still in the office? Received | 5:49 PM 

You didn’t wait for me? ): Received | 6:00 PM 

I was biting my bottom lip when I read his texts, but laughter escaped my mouth when I viewed the image he sent. It’s a photo of his car parked in his usual spot and the empty space on the left side where my vehicle usually parks. He added a crying sticker to it to emphasize how surprised he was to see that I left without waiting for him. 

Please text or call me once you get home safely. Received | 6:02 PM 

I’ll let you know next time if I’m going to be late. I’m sorry. &lt;3 Received | 6:02 PM 

Why is he apologizing? Shouldn’t he be mad about how I disturb him during work hours? Baekhyun is a busy man, but he has an important role in Junmyeon’s company. 

Nonetheless, my fingers start to tap on the screen of my phone to respond. 

Yeah, I just arrived home. Sorry for asking. I was worried that something might have happened. Hope the meeting was a success. Sent | 6:31 PM 

Once I cleaned up the mess I made on the bed while I was frantic over a text that I sent, I strip my clothes to shower, but when I was about to enter the bathroom, my phone starts to ring, indicating a call. 

Baekhyun’s name flashes on the screen as he waits for his Facetime request to be answered. 

“Why’s the camera facing the ceiling?” Baekhyun laughs; his voice is husky yet gentle. His surroundings are a bit dim, his face being illuminated by the red accent light of his car while he drives. “Let me see your gorgeous face, baby.” 

Getting used to the endearment he always uses, I scoff while rolling my eyes even though he can’t see it. “Why are you calling me while you’re driving?” 

He shrugs, his face full of smug. “We didn’t see each other the whole day. You were busy, and I was busy. Payroll missed another deadline. My secretary fucked up a report. Junmyeon was demanding. Everyone was a bitch, basically.” 

I laugh, my eyes crinkling in the process as I listen to his rant. Since he was talking a bit faster than usual, his dialect unconsciously came out, and it was freaking adorable. 

“My hands are on the wheels, baby—don’t worry. Now, let me see your face, please—with a cherry on top?” 

“Baekhyun!” I shriek, thankful that I am home alone at the moment. “I’m about to take a shower, and I’m butt naked, alright?” 

He dramatically gasps, hands hurriedly rotating the steering wheel to the side of the road before pressing the hazard button, and the ticking sound resonates from his line. 

“Oh yeah?” His voice turned sultry as his eyes switched to a more intent gaze. “You really know how to de-stress me, huh?” 

Like a fish out of the water, my mouth opened and closed on its own as if I’m having a hard time breathing. “You—Baekhyun!” 

“Come on, baby. I won’t even look that much.” His tone was back to playful when he covered his eyes with his hand, and then, for a little while, he peeked through the spaces of his fingers.  

Knowing Baekhyun, he won’t stop and would bother me all night long—or probably until the next day, but I don’t want to be hussy. Thus, I finally tilted my phone to show my face and my bare shoulder—showcasing my collarbone to the front camera. “I really need to shower, Baekhyun. I’ll call you later, okay?” 

“I misheard it with: I’ll show you later,” he cackles, his eyes forming a crescent shape as he laughs, and his perfectly aligned teeth are shown. “Alright, baby. Call me when you’re done.” 

“Alright,” I assure with a purr while raising an eyebrow when an idea pops into my head. “And about showing you later—we’ll see about that.” 

I wish I was able to capture the moment Baekhyun’s eyes almost pop out from their socket, and his jaw dropped upon hearing my words, before I tap the end call button. I honestly didn’t expect that kind of reaction from him, and it’s kind of amusing.  

“So,” Jessi bumps her hips with mine while I wash my hands after using the toilet. She uncapped her lipstick and reapplied the makeup on her face. “How many times do you and Baekhyun do it in a week?” 

I swear that I heard my neck crack how fast I snap my head to look at Jessi with wide eyes. “You’re being ridiculous!” 

She scoffs, leaning the side of her hip on the sink as she turns to give me a judging look, arms crossed on her chest. “We’re both adults, and there’s nothing wrong with discussing your sex life with a friend.” 

I choke on my own saliva, “My—my sex life?”  

To be honest, I haven’t been touched since my last relationship. Of course, it crossed my mind here and then, especially when Baekhyun started putting his hand on my thigh every time we sat beside each other, or the way his hand would automatically wrap on my shoulders—sometimes my waist, a bit too intimately; he has also started kissing my cheek—though it’d be just a quick and light one, it wouldn’t fail to leave me blushing for the rest of the day.  

But as much as possible, I don’t want to put much thought into it since he’s that playful. 

“Wait—so, and you’re saying that—” Jessi stops mid-sentence like she’s solving a fraction in her head, her brows furrowed. “You guys haven’t had sex yet?” 

“No!” I quickly defended, my hands flicking some drops of water to her face, making her hiss. “We’re not like that.” 

“We’re not like that,” Jessi mimics with a high-pitched tone of her voice, rolling her eyes before zipping up her make-up bag. “Honey, Baekhyun would always look at you like he’s going to eat your vagina.” 

“Can you not?” I gasp, turning on my heels to get out of the washroom to hide my flushed face. I swear I feel how warmth crept through my body.  

Jessi followed my suit, laughing as she closed the door behind her. “You’re thinking about it, aren’t you? Update me when it finally happens!” 

That incident made me reject Baekhyun’s phone calls when the clock hit five. I left the office quite early to avoid any interaction for now—hopefully. It’s not only that I got bothered sexually, but the fact that I haven’t told anyone, even Baekhyun, that I have not been together with a guy before—and the fact that I’ve only been attracted to a woman... up until Baekhyun. 

Yes, I am not denying that over the time we spent together, I got attached to him. Like, if we don’t see each other during the day because of our workload, both of us would make an effort, be it via Facetime, a quick drive late at night, or sometimes I would drive near his place, or he would drive near mine so we could meet for a meal or drink. 

Baekhyun is a sweet guy. He’s considerate, though a pervert. He notices small things and makes it matter how I like my coffee in the morning, how I don’t like pickles in my burger, or how I’m fond of adorable cheap stuff that he once gave me a three-dollar pastel keychain because it reminds him of me, on how I love my mom’s dogs that he bought them few toys to chew on, or even creating a playlist on Spotify and sending it to me. 

The list goes on... 

And one thing I’ve noticed since he started sticking around. He has never, ever flirted with another girl, at least not in front of me, or not in my knowledge. 

I remember one happy hour in the office when Miyeon tried to start a conversation with Baekhyun. He was civil and got engaged with the topic; however, when he noticed that she started to get tipsy and touchy with him, he got up after giving some lame excuse before looking for me, who was busy at my desk and unable to join the event.  

That story came from Nayeon. She was surprised, to say the least. “You got him all whipped,” she said, giggling like a teenager. 

I didn’t even know the reason at first when Baekhyun appeared in Jessi’s corner, wheeling a chair with him and sitting beside me, watching me work for two hours straight before giving up and calling it a day. 

“Don’t you have any important things to do?” I snort, packing my things up and slinging my bag on my shoulder, but I was snatched right away by Baekhyun, who carried it instead. 

“You’re important to me, baby, or you haven’t gotten the memo yet?” 

That conversation stayed in my mind until now. And I don’t think it’d flow out of my head for a while. 

I know what we have been doing is far beyond what casual friends would do. And I didn’t stop him the first time. Why didn’t I? If I don’t like him, I should’ve told him that, hey, I’ve been attracted to women—only women. Or so I thought. 

At the same time, I’m scared. 

My last relationship didn’t end well. I was treated like garbage for years. I was humiliated and stepped on everything I did. My ex made me feel like I didn’t deserve whatever I accomplished after university—that everything I have is because of her. 

And although I tried so hard to connect my ex with my parents, it just didn’t work.  

“We’re adults now, and we don’t need to be with our parents.” That’s what she reminded me of every time I’d ask to see my parents and be with them on holidays or even on their birthdays. “Just send them a text.” she’d add. 

My dad and my mom didn’t say anything. They were supported and would say that they didn’t want to be a cause of argument between us.  

But I know. 

I know they wanted me to be there; they wanted me to come home and eat dinner with them and laugh and chat in the living room while a variety show plays in the background. 

But Baekhyun won’t do that, right? 

If I finally take a step forward, he’s not going to change, right? 

Because it would hurt like hell because I trust him. 

For the short amount of time I’ve spent with him, he made me feel like no one else—not even my ex when we started dating back in university. 

Are you okay? Is everything okay? Received | 9:03 PM 

Did I do something wrong? Received | 9:04 PM 

I snapped out of my thoughts when my phone dings as messages came in. It’s Baekhyun. I glanced at the screen of my phone. It stopped ringing an hour ago due to countless phone calls he was making. 

I don’t know if I did something you’re mad about, but please let me know if I took something too far. I will apologize and make it up to you. Received | 9:08 PM 

But please don’t ignore me. Received | 9:09 PM 

I kept staring at my phone as I read his messages and waited for another one to come in. 

You’re reading my texts, but you’re not answering my calls, baby. I’m honestly getting worried. Received | 9:11 PM 

I’m sorry if I made you angry, but can you at least tell me if you’re okay? I’m going crazy over here. Received | 9:25 PM 

Reading his last text, I finally decided to move my fingers to reply. He has done nothing wrong, and I’m the one who has an issue. Hence, it’s not fair for him to endure whatever I’m doing. 

I’m fine. Just not feeling a hundred percent. I’m sorry for not responding. Sent | 9:32 PM 

Don't worry, I’m not mad. :) Sent | 9:33 PM 

I throw my phone to the side, and my hand extends to the lamp on my nightstand. I shift my position to my side, pulling the duvet up to my shoulders as I close my eyes to sleep for the night. 

I had enough thoughts running in my head, and sleeping this early on a Friday night might be a good idea for my mental health. 

I think I slept for like thirty minutes until my phone started to vibrate under my pillow, waking me up. I blindly reach for my eyeglasses on my side and wear them before answering the call.  

Baekhyun. 

I sit up on the bed, eyes wide, as I tap the green button to accept the call. “Hello?” I croaked, rubbing my throat. It felt really dry upon speaking. 

“Oh, crap! You were asleep?” 

I grunt in response, running my fingers through my hair before getting up from the bed to turn on the lights in my bedroom. 

“Oh, I think I got the correct house.” 

“H-huh?” I’m half-asleep and unable to comprehend his sentence clearly. 

“Did you just turn on the lights, baby?” 

As if I didn’t know, I look at the ceiling light to see if it’s really turned on, and almost face-palm myself when I remember that I flicked the switch literally ten seconds ago. “Yeah, I did. Why?” 

“Ugh, I thought Junmyeon would lie about this.” he exhales, and I heard him getting out of his car. “Can you come out for a bit, baby? I’m outside your house.” 

Without ending the call, my phone still pressed on my right ear; I hastily run downstairs, almost tripping on the way down, earning worried looks from my parents, who are still in the formal living space, chatting. 

“Oh, God, honey!” My mom stands on her feet, her hands on her chest when I reach the floor. “Careful, please!” 

My dad stands up as well, walking in my direction to check if I had any injury when I didn’t fall. “Let’s end this night without any injuries, alright, sweetheart?” 

I nod my head hurriedly, plastering an innocent grin on my face, pressing the end call button on my phone. “Sorry, sorry. I just—someone’s outside, so... I’ll be heading out quickly.” 

My dad nods his head with a fatherly smile, telling me to be careful, and I think he’s just happy that I started going out again. At the same time, my mom looks like she’s going to peek out the window to see who I’m meeting at this hour. 

“Uh... dad? Can you please control mom?” 

My dad turns his head to my mom, who immediately smiles innocently. It's like she’s not about to ask me thousands of questions about who I’m going to meet in my sleepwear. 

He shakes his head, though fondly. “Just go, sweetheart. I’ll handle your mom. Tell her we said hi.” 

I nod, grinning widely. “Of course. I’ll let him know.” 

My dad blinks several times before gasping loudly, and like a signal light, my mom squeals, jumping on her feet happily.  

I laugh at their reaction before opening the front door. “I’ll be back later!” 

Baekhyun’s face lit up upon seeing me getting out of the door. He starts to walk to meet me halfway and engulfs me in a hug. His hand is on the back of my head, while his other hand is placed on the small of my back. “I was so worried.” 

I rubbed his back for a while before I reciprocated the hug by hugging his waist closer to me. “I’m sorry.” 

He pulls away, placing a hand on my forehead and then my neck. “You don’t have a fever...” 

I chuckle, slapping his chest lightly. “No, I’m not sick. I’m just tired and have a lot going on in my head for days now.” 

His eyes lock with mine, as if trying to read what has been going on in my mind. “I’m here if you need me.” 

Before I could even respond, I heard rustling inside the house. I peek over my shoulder and see how my mom and my dad hid behind the curtains by the window. Baekhyun follows where I’m looking and tilts his head in confusion when he sees nothing. 

“My parents are watching us,” I shake my head as I try to pull Baekhyun towards his car. “Do you want to get out of here?” 

“Huh—” he turns around to face my parents’ house again, and his eyes scan the façade to look for them. “What—where? I can’t see anyone.” 

I sigh, shaking my head as I cover half of my face with my hands, embarrassed with the thought of my parents’ idly tattle, at the same time ecstatic that they didn’t view my last relationship as something to be wary about.  

“Just raise your hand and wave a little. They’ll see you.” 

With furrow brows, Baekhyun hesitantly raises his left hand and moves it a bit. Not even five seconds later, the window in the formal living space is opened, my mom’s face peeking out. “Hope to meet you soon! Come over for a meal sometime!” 

“Mom!” To say that I’m horrified is an understatement. Everyone knows my mom as a gentle, kind, prim and proper woman, but no one knows, except my dad, how she can be when she gets eager and exhilarated. 

Baekhyun gasps loudly, straightening the coat he’s wearing before bowing politely to my mom and my dad, who is trying to pull Mom away from the window. He waves goodbye before closing the window and drawing the curtains as well. 

“Okay,” I chuckle, shaking my head at my parents’ action, though a fond smile is on my lips. “That was my mom and my dad. I—uhm, you can come over, you know—if you want.” 

“I’d love to,” Baekhyun answers immediately as if he’s been waiting for me to invite him myself. 

Despite hanging out together for months, it’s my first time to be Baekhyun’s passenger in his car. We both laughed about it when he said, “I even thought about slashing your tires so I can drive you home.” 

Since I currently live in my parents' house and I haven’t introduced Baekhyun formally to them, I can’t invite him in an instant. When I explained this to Baekhyun, he didn’t even hesitate to suggest driving us back to his place. 

“No funny business, I swear,” he removes one of his hands from the steering wheel to draw a cross on his chest with his finger. “You’re already in your sleepwear, so I can’t think of a place to go to unless you have somewhere in mind?” 

“That’s fine. As long as I get home in one piece.” I shrug, holding onto the plastic bags on my lap.  

Being a thoughtful Baekhyun, he purchased a bunch of different snacks I’ve been eating since we got close to each other. The chips I keep munching on when work gets too loaded, down to the chocolate bars I keep in my drawer at the office. There’s even a fever patch and a paracetamol in a small paper bag on the side. 

Baekhyun’s place is tidy. I didn’t expect it to be this neat in the first place, as much as how rude it sounds. And at the thought that he didn’t expect to have a visitor, I feel ashamed of the clutter in the corner of my childhood bedroom at my parents’ house. 

I’m also surprised that he even crouches on the floor to help me wear an indoor slipper that is suspiciously in pastel color.  

“I hope I got the size right,” he mumbles under his breath as he observes the footwear.  

“Yeah, it’s perfect.” They’re a couple of centimeters larger than my usual, but it’s much more comfortable this way. “Thank you.” 

He chuckles huskily as he stands up, flicking the tip of my nose with his index finger, a thing he has been doing for quite some time now.  

I follow him to the kitchen, where he places the plastic bags on the kitchen counter. My eyes scan the place further, and I can’t help but be in awe of how he keeps it neat when he’s busy with work. 

“My mom comes over from time to time,” Baekhyun suddenly speaks, snapping me out of my trance as if he’s reading what’s going on in my mind. “But I do like keeping my place clean and organized, else I wouldn’t be unable to function.” 

I scrunch up my nose at him, “Well, thank you for making me feel bad about the pile of laundry in my room.” 

He laughs out loud, eyes crinkling and forming into a crescent shape as he does. “I can help you with that, baby. Just hit me up.” 

I roll my eyes at him with a playful smile on my face. I sat at the barstool, and he followed suit. “But seriously, I didn’t expect you to behave. No offense, but I thought you’re going to slam me on the wall and do the deed as soon as we arrived.” 

Baekhyun gave me a baffled expression before placing both of his hands on his chest as if he were hurt by what he had just heard. “I didn’t know you think so low of me.” 

I cackle, hitting his shoulder with my fist lightly. “I’m just kidding, you idiot.” 

He chortles before placing his hand on the side of my neck. “Baby, I’m not going to slam you on the wall if we’re going to do it. I’m going to lay you on my soft, comfortable bed before kissing the hell out of you.” 

“Oh,” was all I could mutter before chucking awkwardly, scratching my cheek before looking everywhere else but his intent gaze. 

I thought I’m ready for this kind of conversation with him. However, my hands suddenly feel clammy, and my heart feels like it’s going to jump out of my chest any second. 

Without removing his hand from my neck, he steps closer to where I’m seated. He stands in the space between my legs as his other hand holds my cheek to make me look at him.  

“You’re nervous,” he remarks, his face void of any expression. 

I am unable to find my voice; I can only grunt as a response.  

Baekhyun caresses my cheek with his thumb, his gentle eyes assuring me while his mouth forms a smile. “We’re not going to do anything if you’re not comfortable with it.” 

I nodded my head, though I held onto his wrist when he was about to pull away. “Baekhyun, I—” I close my eyes for a few seconds before opening them. Seeing Baekhyun’s worried look made me exhale shakily. 

“I’m going to tell you something I haven’t told anyone at the office yet,” I wince when I realize how my voice sounded so small and terrified, like I’m going to confess that I stole candy from the candy jar in kindergarten. “And I’m going to ask you something, and I’d like you to be honest, okay?” 

Baekhyun, all of a sudden, drop a kiss on my forehead, which he hadn’t done before. My body feels warm as a blush crept up on my face. “Okay, baby.” 

“I’ve never been with a guy before,” I confess before pressing my lips together in the hope that he’ll take the news well. 

He raises his brows as he tilts his head to the side, “You never have a boyfriend before? Was it you, or was I just dreaming when you told me that you just came out of an unhealthy relationship? Did I drink a lot to not remember?” 

I look at him as he rambles, and when he ends his sentences, he looks at me like he’s expecting me to laugh or confirm his assumption that he’s just dreaming, but I keep my eyes on him without any emotion but silently pleading him to get to my point. 

It takes him almost a minute before he widens his eyes in realization and gawks. “Wait—you—you’re—” 

The corner of my lip turns down when he removes his hold like I’m a burning hot iron. With a sad smile, I nod my head. “I’m sorry for not telling you, and it just didn’t cross my mind that we would actually be taking things too far.” 

Baekhyun stands still, his mouth still agape as he stares at me with wide eyes. Reading the room, I nod my head, patting his arm before jumping off the barstool. “I’ll see myself out.” 

As soon as my feet land on the floor, I’m carried back to the barstool with a loud thump. Surprised, I look at him with my eyes wide open.  

“Where the hell are you going?” he growled, hands gripping my sides as if he’s trying to prevent me from running away. 

“I—” I flinch from the tone of his voice as for months I’ve known Baekhyun, he has never raised nor shown his anger or even annoyance in front of me. 

I think he notices how my orbs shake when I cower in some fear and anxiousness. His brows are furrowed, and he is suddenly relaxed, and his grip goes from rough to gentle. 

“I’m not going to hurt you,” he breathes out. He looks surprised by his action as well, more than by my reaction. “I’m sorry, I was just surprised. But where do you think you’re going?” 

Letting out a deep, trembling breath, I bite my bottom lip as I lock my eyes with him. His kind and considerate demeanor finally comes back. 

“I just thought that you didn’t want to do anything to me upon hearing my confession,” my voice is small, and my fingers start to fidget the seam of the sweatpants I’m wearing—a habit that I have when I’m nervous and frighted.  

“Baby, I—” Baekhyun sighed, closing his eyes and leaning his forehead on mine. I could feel his breath fanning my face, and I couldn’t help but close my eyes while I waited for his next words. “I’m sorry. I’m really sorry if I made you uncomfortable. I didn’t know. I just—I genuinely like you. It doesn’t matter to me who you have been with, but I like you. And I want to be with you... if that’s okay.” 

I peek through my lashes to see that he’s still not opening his eyes. I raise my right hand and place it on his cheek. A smile automatically spreads on my lips when he leans on my palm. 

It’s not the first time Baekhyun has said that he likes me or is interested in me. But the first time, he said it without any playful remarks like he has done before. 

“Baekhyun, can I now ask you something? Can you be honest?” I murmur, caressing the skin of his cheek with the pad of my thumb. 

Baekhyun only grunted in response. 

“Why me?” 

This time, he slowly opened his eyes, though not looking up to meet my eyes. He’s silent for quite some time while he thinks about my question, and I’m grateful that he seems to be taking my two-word question seriously. 

“You make me laugh,” Baekhyun finally answers. His voice comes out as a whisper, and he exhales through his nose before finally meeting my eyes. “And I love to laugh.” 

I snort, shaking my head before leaning away from his forehead. I scrunch my nose at him when I see how he stares at me with a fond smile on his face.  

“Did it bother you, though?” 

“Bother me?” I asked, tilting my head in confusion about his query. 

“That I took advances towards you when I have, you know—” Baekhyun innocently shrugs, licking his bottom lip like he’s hesitant to say the next word that’s about to come out of his mouth. “Dick.” 

My laughter comes like a whistling kettle while I hold my stomach from laughing so hard. He looks confused and a bit offended, but he joins in when he realizes that I won’t stop laughing for a while. 

“Sorry—” I cough, trying my best to stop another round of my ugly, hysterical laugh. “Well, to tell you honestly, the first time took me by surprise, but I got used to it. You keep texting me dick jokes that it suddenly felt like a normal thing. Although I’m grateful that you didn’t send a photo of your penis, or I’d really hunt you and stab you in your sleep.” 

It’s his turn to laugh, and my heart finally feels light, as if the awkwardness from my confession is drifting away. I bit my bottom lip while I watched the twinkle in the corner of his eyes as he opened his mouth widely and roared laughter, showcasing his perfectly aligned teeth. 

The room had slowly gone quiet when his eyes met mine, and we stared at each other for a few seconds before he decided to break the silence. 

“Are you going to hit me if I kiss you?” 

I scoff, rolling my eyes playfully. “I might if you don’t.” 

I let out a long, satisfied sigh when he finally placed his lips on mine. It’s what I’ve imagined all along. Soft and warm.  

Warmth. It’s what creeps from my neck to my face when Baekhyun cups my jaw to tilt my head to the side to have better access to my mouth.  I couldn’t stop the moan from the back of my throat when he spread my lips with his to open my mouth, and my tongue met his. 

That made Baekhyun pull away from my mouth, and my eyes are unable to open for a few seconds as the feeling of his lips lingered on mine.  

“You are breathtaking,” Baekhyun’s voice is hoarse, and when I open my eyes, his orbs are dancing around my facial features. He runs his thumb on my bottom lip before leaning forward for a peck on my lips and pulling away in an instant. “So, what do you say?” 

“I’ve never thought I could like someone like you,” I exhale through my nose, and my voice comes out like a whisper.  

“Because I have a dick?” he chuckled huskily, sending me a cheeky smile. 

I burst out laughing, pushing his chest lightly before hooking my fingers on his belt. “You seem to be eager about your dick, Baekhyun. You sure it won’t disappoint?” I playfully taunt him, raising a brow suggestively. 

Being dramatic as he is, he gasps loudly, clearly offended—still. He hastily unbuckles his belt and is about to unbutton his pants. “I can prove it right now—” 

With my eyes wide open, I stop his movement by holding his arms firmly. I chuckle, a bit abashed with my facetious remark about his pride. “How about the bed?” 

Baekhyun has a cheek to blush when he realizes that I gave him the consent to really show me his shaft, maybe even do more. It’s actually the first time I’ve seen him flushed. It had been the other way around. 

I’m a giggling mess when Baekhyun visibly struggles to carry me to his bedroom. I was honest with him when I told him that I like keeping a healthy weight. I don’t do fad diets, and he knew that I eat a lot of not-so-healthy stuff when I’m stressed out. But he still insisted on being “romantic,” as he said. 

When my back finally hit the soft mattress, I let out a cough from laughing too much before meeting Baekhyun’s eyes. Despite grunting all the way to his room, he seemed fine; his gaze was dancing around my facial features. 

“What?” I tried my best to keep a straight face when, in fact, our current position on his bed made me realize how intimate we are, and also close, probably—if things go well, on doing something besides kissing each other. 

I almost melted on the spot when Baekhyun displays a gentle smile on his face while his fingers tuck a loose strand of hair behind my ear. “A man is just appreciating his woman’s beauty.” 

My eyes roll playfully, though I can feel how my stomach flutter from his smooth words. “Alright, mister. Are we going to be just sappy all night or...?” 

Baekhyun chuckles huskily, leaning his body weight on top of me and diving his head down to kiss my lips. Then, it traveled to my chin and to my jaw. 

My mouth falls open when his mouth reaches my neck. It started with his soft, puckered lips on my skin until he started with an open-mouthed kiss on the base of my neck.  

We are moving quite fast, but I’m too occupied by the way his tongue is brushing on my skin, his teeth biting the soft flesh before sucking on the spot. 

“Shit—Baekhyun,” I sigh from the stimulation, closing my eyes when I feel the tightness in his pants as he moves to place his lips on mine again.  

A silent whimper escapes my mouth when Baekhyun suddenly pulls away. I snap my eyes open, furrowing my brows at him. But before I could even open my mouth to ask him why he stopped, he beat me to it.  

“Are you okay—is this okay? Am I making you uncomfortable?” 

“I’m okay. C’mere.” I answer in an instant, grabbing his neck to kiss him again, but he pulls away. 

“Do you want me to keep the lights on, or do you prefer it off?” 

“I’d prefer it if you keep your mouth on mine,” I deadpan. The built-up frustration in me starts to act up. 

I expect Baekhyun to respond sassily or to laugh as he normally does, but he looks a bit somber, and it somehow makes me feel guilty. 

“I just don’t want to ruin this, baby,” Baekhyun explains, heaving a sigh. “Trust me when I say that I want this more than you do, but I’m thinking that this might be your first time—” 

“With a guy, yeah...” I cut him off, fiddling with the button of his dress shirt. “I’m sorry—I didn’t think about that.” 

“Hey,” Baekhyun nudged my nose with his to call for my attention, and it did. I see his bright eyes, and he immediately smiles. “Why are you apologizing? I'm honored that you want me, but let me take care of you, yeah?” 

I nod my head with a smile, “Okay.” 

Dropping another kiss on my mouth, he starts lifting the oversized sweater I’m wearing, exposing more skin for him to touch.  

“Oh, shit,” Baekhyun curses under his breath when the hem of my sweater reaches above my chest, exposing my bare mounds to him. “No bra?” 

I giggle, placing my palms over my nipples when I see how he ogles on them. “I was sleeping when you called, remember? Who wears a bra when they sleep?” 

He gently grabs my wrists, pulling them to my sides before removing my top completely. My back arches when he puts one nipple in his warm cavern, his teeth grazing the surface before completely sucking my areole further into his mouth. 

My hand flies to his head, bunching his hair softly when his tongue starts swirling around. He makes sure to treat my other boob the same, giving me the same pleasure as the previous one.  

I let a moan when he starts trailing kisses down to my navel, squirming a little bit when he purposely licks on the side of my stomach when he notices that I’m quite ticklish. 

He unties my sweatpants, pulling them down from my thighs to my legs until they reach the floor. I’m left in my plain cotton underwear, and I can’t stop covering my face with my hands when he holds my knees before pulling them apart. 

I should’ve at least worn a much decent piece if I just knew that I’d be bare in front of Baekhyun. 

But that thought flies outside the window when I feel his index finger lightly rub against my clothed private part. When I open my eyes, I’m surprised to see that Baekhyun is already looking at me as if waiting for a negative reaction or refusal. 

“Oh, God—” I prop on my elbow to get a better view of him rubbing me down there, my jaw slack for a silent moan. “Keep going, please.” 

Taking it as a go signal, he proceeds to remove my underwear, leaving me completely bare before him.  

I throw my head back down to the mattress when Baekhyun positions himself down on the bed, spreading my thigh wider, his breath fans on my womanhood.  

The pad of his thumb rubs my folds. His movements are gentle and slow, but they don’t fail to make me roll my eyes from the sensation, letting out a grunt.  

I squeak when the tip of his nose makes contact with my clit, his finger parting my folds to expose the bundle of nerves. He then starts giving my bud a peck repeatedly. The action makes my womanhood produce its own lubricant, and I only realize that Baekhyun did that to stimulate me rather than forcing me to be wet in an instant. 

Damn. He’s good. 

“Ha...” I moan when his tongue finally runs through my folds. I hold onto his head when he grunts in response, and the vibration makes the tip of my toes curl. “Fuck—yes, please.” 

I heard Baekhyun snicker at my womanhood upon hearing me curse—which I rarely do, sucking on my clit before flicking his tongue on it. My hands, absent-mindedly, push the back of his head further between my legs, feeling the knot in my stomach quickly forming. 

I can’t stop the noise coming out from my mouth when he shakes his head, stimulating my womanhood intensely. His middle finger sneaks inside my hole before pulling away to peer at my face.  

“Please—don’t stop,” I beg, biting my bottom lip when he added another finger, thrusting them faster. “I’m almost there.” 

Baekhyun grunts, his mouth coming to my clit again to push me to the edge. I almost lost it just as he started sucking on the bud, making an erotic slurping sound across the room. 

My thigh clamps his head as I try to pull away when my climax hits, but he’s much stronger, making sure he gets all the substance from my entrance.  

I prop on my elbow even though I’m still recovering from the mind-blowing orgasm he gave me. I watch him with hooded eyes as he continuously digs his tongue on my entrance, moaning like he’s satisfied with my cum. 

When my muscles start to twitch from overstimulation, I push his face away with my hand before covering my womanhood as he attempts to have a taste again. 

“Okay, you’ve had enough,” I laughed light-heartedly, grabbing his face for a kiss.  

Baekhyun moans when I part his lips with my tongue, tasting myself on him. “I’ll never have enough of you, baby. I don’t think I can ever get enough.” 

I wrap my arms around his neck, climbing onto his lap for us to switch positions on the bed. I trail kisses from his lips to his jaw, and when I reach his neck, my fingers start to unbutton his dress shirt, pushing the fabric away from his body to expose his toned torso. 

However, before I could even completely remove his pants, he stopped me from doing so, and I looked at him with a baffled expression.  

“Are you alright with—” 

“Sucking a dick?” I snort, tugging his pants again when he lifts his hips for the garment to slide down his bottom. “I’ve never tried it before; thus, your guidance will be very much appreciated.” 

Baekhyun grins upon hearing my statement, although he closes his eyes in an instant when I circle my fingers on his member without any warning. He’s already hard, and I’m unable to hide my amusement at how it keeps twitching when I start moving my hand.  

“Baby...” Baekhyun growls, snapping his eyes open to observe what I’m doing. “I had a long day; I don’t think I’ll last long tonight. I’ll make it up to you, I promise.” 

I snicker, pumping his length continuously. “I thought I heard you say that it won’t disappoint.” 

“It won’t,” he glares, though the furrow on his brows quickly vanishes when I grip him tighter. “But someone decided that it was a great idea to ghost me this afternoon.” 

I finally stopped my ministration, giving him a sheepish smile. “Sorry.” 

“I had to endure Jessi’s nagging when I asked her about you and that you were not answering my calls. She thought that I did something wrong to you.” 

I jut out my bottom lip on him to act adorable, but it’s obviously a failure when he visibly grimaces playfully. I hit his chest before throwing myself on top of him, giving his mouth a smooch. “I’m sorry. I’ve been thinking about us, and it’s eating me alive. You know what happened with my ex, and as much as possible, I don’t want it to happen again.” 

“I will do my best not to hurt you, baby,” he kisses the tip of my nose, which I find to be too endearing. “I may play around a lot, but I take my relationship very seriously. My friends and family know that.” 

“And you’re thirty,” I press my palms on each side of his cheek, giggling when his lips turn into a pout. “You need to settle down, old man.” 

Baekhyun gasps, holding my wrist and sitting up on the bed. “Are you proposing to me right now?” 

I know he meant it as a joke, but my mouth opens and closes like a fish out of water. He probably noticed how flustered I became, and he laughed it off, kissing my lips to calm me down. “I’ll do the proposing, baby. Don’t worry.” 

His words didn’t help, and my whole body felt like it was on fire. Tonight is officially our first night together, and the discussion about marriage has already been brought up. It’s obvious that we are moving too fast, but somehow, it doesn’t bother me... at all. 

We are just looking at each other for a few moments, in each other’s embrace. Hence, I finally decided to break the silence. 

“Can I suck your dick now?” 

Baekhyun laughs out loud, caressing my bare back with his palm. “Alright, baby. Just for a bit?” 

I nod my head with a wide smile on my face, tucking my hair behind my ear. He sees that I’m struggling with my hair, and thankfully, he decided to hold it for me.  

I lower my head until my lips touch his tip. My eyes flickered to see Baekhyun’s reaction for a bit when I heard him hiss. His face is scrunched up, and he’s biting his bottom lip while watching me go down on him. 

Feeling encouraged by his response, I spread my lips wider to take him in my warm mouth. My heart feels like it’s being tickled by soft feathers when he moans loudly, “Oh—shit, baby.” 

His grip on my hair becomes tighter when I started bobbing my head around his length, not forgetting to circle my tongue on his tip every time I need to take a breath. 

“W-wait, I’m close, baby,” he pulls me up from my position and guides me to lie down on the mattress while he positions himself between my legs. 

When he reaches his nightstand for protection, I immediately stop him from opening the packet. “Is it alright if we do it without the rubber?” 

It’s his time to be surprised by my request. He raises his brows in shock, although he seems to be tempted. “Are you sure?” 

I quickly nod my head, “Yes, I want to feel you.” 

Baekhyun throws the packet of condoms on the floor, placing his palm on the mattress beside my head for support as he lines his length on my hole, seemingly pleased with my justification. “Okay. I’ll just pull out—” 

“Can you come in me?” I’m so embarrassed to ask him this question, but I’ve been meaning to, as I really want to feel it. In case he feels uncomfortable with the idea, I instantly added, “I’ll get pills tomorrow to avoid any unplanned occurrence, I promise.” 

“Relax, baby,” Baekhyun gives me a reassuring smile, slowly pushing his length into me. My jaw goes slack, and my eyes close from the stretch. It’s not that painful, as I’ve used stuff for penetration before. 

“I don’t mind the idea of you being swollen here.” He places his hand on my belly, rubbing the skin with his thumb. “In fact, I’d love it. But you have the final say, baby. It’s your body.” 

My bottom lip is caught between my teeth as I whimper when he sheathes his member deep in me. I throw my head back on the mattress, and he takes it as an opportunity to lick and bite my exposed neck. 

When I tap his shoulder to let him know I’m ready, he straightens his back, holding on to my hips as he pulls out and pushes in my womanhood.  

It seems impossible, but it feels like my walls can perceive the veins of his cock. It twitches from time to time, hitting a spot in me that would make me roll my eyes to the back of my head.  

I’ve used toys before; my ex loved to use them, but this is different. His length is snug on my walls and rubs my insides perfectly. Not to mention the way his hips would snap on my pelvis, stimulating my outer lips as well. 

My chest starts to heave as I pant when Baekhyun adds his finger to the scene, rubbing my clit while his thrusts go faster. 

“Oh, gosh!” I squeak, frantically gripping the sheets, when I feel the tight knot in my stomach close to bursting. “I’m close—please, don’t stop.” 

I didn’t expect that he could go faster than he already had, but boy, he truly didn’t disappoint when he went faster, and his thrust became firmer. 

“I’m almost there, baby,” he grunts, removing his hand away from my clit so he can support his weight when he leans down to place his lips on mine.  

I moan in his mouth, holding on to his back, when I feel something warm shoot inside of me. The warmth almost feels like a tickle and surprisingly satisfying. I never thought those explicit videos I watched when I was a teenager were true. 

My arms hugged his figure closer to my body when he finally gave up and lay on top of me. His face is buried in my neck while he catches his breath. It takes him a good minute to remove his weight on me, not even giving me a chance to comprehend what he’s about to do. 

He stuffs two of his fingers in my hole, and his lips go to my clit to suck the bud. I let out a high-pitched scream as I grabbed a fistful of his hair, totally overwhelmed by his quick movement. 

“I’m coming—I’m coming!” 

My legs convulse from the intensity of my second climax of the night, and I almost cried when Baekhyun wouldn’t stop slurping the juices from my hole. I didn’t expect it to happen, and I guess he didn’t see it coming as well, but a thin liquid gushed out from my vagina from overstimulation. 

I was about to apologize to him but was surprised when he looked so pleased, sticking his tongue out before licking a stripe on my folds one last time before climbing up to devour my mouth. 

“That’s so hot,” he remarks, pertaining to what happened. “I’d pay with my soul to make it happen again.” 

I chuckle at his statement, though tiredly, “I’m glad I didn’t disappoint you.” 

Baekhyun laughs, biting my bottom lip and pulling it with his teeth. “And I hope I didn’t disappoint you either.” 

A smile formed on my lips before giving his lips a chaste kiss that I could say that I poured my heart into. “You’re perfect.” 

When I decided to activate my social media again, I instantly received many messages from my high school friends and people from university.  

My high school friends were so ecstatic when they saw that I uploaded a story on my account after being unreachable for months.  

It was a silhouette of Baekhyun and the sun setting in the background.  

They were supportive and happy that I was seeing someone again after the bad break-up with my ex. 

While the people I know from university didn’t even say any greetings and went straight to, “Who is this?” or, “A guy???” some even sent, “You’re straight now?” 

I chose to ignore the toxicity from those people and focus on the good side. I left them on seen and went on with my life where everything seems to be falling into place. 

And I think that irked them as someone sent me a screenshot of their conversation in a group chat that my ex is also a part of—and which I was kicked out of when we broke up. They were talking about the story I uploaded and how I am probably rubbing it on their faces that I’m dating someone again, notably a man. 

I don’t mind their tattles, but what my ex said bothers me a lot. She said, “He’s just a tit for tat from our break-up. It’s only going to be joyful at first. They’ll break up in a few months, believe me.” 

I remember my face turning so red when I read her message. However, I did my best to keep my cool and replied to the person who sent the screenshot with a simple, “I’d rather not include myself in their narrative. But I appreciate the thought of you reaching out.” 

Because she couldn’t be more wrong.  

A week after we officially got together, Baekhyun was the one who asked if he could meet my parents. I told my mom about it, and she enthusiastically invited him for dinner.  

To say that my parents love him at the first meeting is such an understatement. Baekhyun is a charmer. Everyone could be swooned by his tactics, and my parents weren’t an exemption. 

A week after that, he was already playing golf with my dad, and he would play the piano with my mom. 

In the third month, Baekhyun invited me to attend the wedding of his cousin. His parents would be there, and he wanted me to meet them. It was such a nerve-wracking moment since I never got a chance to be close to my ex’s parents or any of her family members. 

But boy, was I wrong. 

His mother linked her arm with mine almost the whole time at the reception. She asked different questions that weren’t personal and made me promise at least five times to visit them at their home for me to try her cooking. 

His dad was the calm and serene one but would say the word: daughter-in-law when someone would ask who I was. 

I also met his older brother and his family. They were all nice and friendly. Baekhyun’s nephews even started calling me aunt. 

“You’re the second girl Baekhyun introduced to us,” his brother told me, tipping his head in Baekhyun’s direction while the latter was engaged in a conversation with their relatives. “The first one was his senior in high school. She was his first girlfriend. She shouldn’t be included, to be honest, because we’ve known her before they started going out. So, technically, you’re the first.” 

I was not uncomfortable with the mention of my current lover’s past relationship, and I appreciated the honesty instead. “He mentioned that he dated quite a few before me, though.” 

His brother snorted, shaking his head. “He did. Mom would always ask him to bring them over. But he kept saying that he wouldn’t bring someone he won’t marry.” 

Baekhyun was confused and quite worried on the drive home because my face was crimson red the whole night. He kept checking my forehead and neck to see if I had a fever or if I had eaten something bad at the wedding reception. 

I wasn’t planning on telling him the reason for my sudden change of behavior and why I was blushing like crazy, but when we arrived at his place and were about to go to bed, he insisted on going to the hospital so I could get checked. 

Hence, I decided to tell him what his older brother told me. I hid my face in the space on his neck, abashed, and I was pretty sure that my blushing went over and beyond. 

I was expecting him to laugh, to make fun of the silly thing his brother informed me. But a kiss on my forehead and a back rub were the things I received from him. 

“Of course, I do see myself marrying you,” his voice was like velvet as he spoke, his hand never stopping caressing my back. “I can’t see myself with anyone else besides you.” 

I was about to cry, but he might’ve realized that what he said was mushy and decided to be his playful self again. “Because who else can tolerate your dad's jokes except me?” 

My fist came in contact with his chest, although a bubble of laughter escaped my lips. I also couldn’t see myself with anyone else but him. 

That was the first time we said the three words to each other, as we both came from our love-making relationship. 

In the sixth month, I told my parents that I saw an apartment near the office that fit my budget and was planning to get a place for myself as I felt bad about living in their house at my age. 

They told me that they would love it if I stayed with them since they did get lonely when I was still with my ex. But at the same time, they assured me that they would respect my decision, whatever it would be. 

I promised that I would visit them if I ever moved out and told them that they could do the same.  

Before I could contact the realtor, I decided to tell Baekhyun about my plans as well. He was surprised, to tell the least, and I honestly didn’t expect him to react the way he did. 

“Why would you look at a different place?” Although he wasn’t yelling, it was obvious that his tone of voice was close to being upset.  

“I’m just planning, babe,” I told him, squeezing his arm to ease his mood, but he just brushed me off, which was shocking. I cleared my throat before clarifying what I said. “That’s why I’m telling you first before I inquire with the realtor if I could check the place and apply for a lease and—” 

“And I asked you why.” 

It was also the first time I’ve seen him in this mood, and it made me want to cry on the spot. Not because I got scared of him but because he was upset because of what I told him—because of me. 

“I feel bad living with my parents, Baekhyun,” I confessed, looking at my lap as I fiddled with the seam of my pants. “I’m already twenty-eight, and I shouldn’t be a burden to my parents. Also, the place I’m eyeing is only ten minutes away from the office, and it would somehow make my life easier.” 

Baekhyun scoffs, turning his head to me. “And the distance of my place is also ten minutes away from the office. That didn’t cross your mind?” 

I opened my mouth but closed it right away when I couldn’t find the courage to tell him that I did. However, I didn’t have the guts to tell him—and I was embarrassed as hell to even think about it, so I opt to look for a place on my own. 

“Do you even love me?!”  

I gasped loudly, my eyes wide as saucers as I stared at him like he had grown another head on his neck. “What the hell, Baekhyun? I told you about it because I care about your opinion. Why are you getting angry at me like I did something horrendous?” 

I believed that made him slap some reality on him. He closed his eyes and exhaled through his nose, “I—I’m sorry, baby. I didn’t mean to shout. I just—I don’t want you living by yourself, it’s not safe. And I have my own place. You can move in with me—and honestly, I’d love that if you do.” 

I rolled my eyes at him, shaking my head, and it made him panic, thinking that I was declining his proposal. “I’ll think about it, you idiot.” 

Baekhyun exaggeratedly pouted, huffing as he tried to act cute, which never failed to make me cringe every time he did, by the way. “You didn’t even think twice about renting another place. What’s so wrong with living with your awesomely handsome boyfriend, huh? You get to see my face first thing in the morning, get to shower with me because, you know—conserve water and all that, and seriously, you don’t have to pay rent.” 

I was about to cut him off when he mentioned that I wouldn’t have to pay rent if I moved in with him, but he placed his index finger on my mouth, shushing me like a child. 

“I won’t accept any kind of money for rent, baby. A blowjob, maybe?” 

My palm hurt from slapping his arm repeatedly, but he just kept laughing as he dodged every hit. “You know I do that for free.” 

Baekhyun bit his bottom lip, raising a brow suggestively. “Shit, now I’m hard.” 

I didn’t know how our argument would always make us tangled in bed, but it just happened. Always. 

And you can blame the euphoria or whatever, but it made me agree to move to his place. He asked when I literally just came, and I wasn’t even done screaming his name, and my muscles were still convulsing from the intensity of my orgasm. 

He played dirty, but I didn’t regret my decision a single bit. 

In the eleventh month, something unexpected happened. 

Actually, two things happened. 

I received an invitation from a university acquaintance to her wedding. I didn’t want to go because this person was part of the group chat where they gossiped about my life. But Baekhyun told me to go and be the bigger person. 

I knew he told me to go not to become the bigger person, but because he read her text and specifically said, “Bring your boyfriend with you.” 

He knew about the screenshot of what my ex had told other people when I uploaded a photo of him. I wasn’t planning on telling him because I found it completely ridiculous, but I was drunk, and my mouth ran before my brain did. 

“You just want to show how hot you are,” I rolled my eyes, chucking a pillow on his face. 

“Oh, so you admit that I’m hot?” he trapped my figure on the bed with his arms, grinding his bulge on my private part. 

“Eh, you’re okay...” I shrugged my shoulders, dismissing his growing ego. 

“That’s not what you told me last night when I was eating you out—” 

“Alright, alright! I’ll go, okay? But you need to come with me. I don’t think I’ll survive more than an hour there.” I covered his mouth with my hand, and he had the audacity to smile and kiss my palm.  

He removed my hand from his mouth, dropping a kiss to my mouth and then to my neck while his fingers yanked my underwear, throwing it to the floor. “Of course, I’ll come with you. But for now, I’ll come to you. How’s that sound?” 

I hugged his neck, and a throaty moan escaped my lips when his length plunged into my womanhood, caressing my walls satisfyingly. “Oh, I’d love that.” 

When the day came, I felt under the weather, and Baekhyun had an impromptu meeting. I was about to text my friend, but before I could, she already left a message thirty minutes ago.  

“I’m expecting you to be there! I haven’t seen you in a long time. Just because Yunjin will be there, you’ll bail out on my wedding day!” 

I can’t remember if we were that close back in university for me to be an important present on her big day, but as I stared at her message, I realized that they just wanted me to be the main dish. 

Baekhyun even told me to stay at home and that he’d come home right after his meeting, but I had already responded to that person, confirming my attendance. 

He called me stubborn when I explained that I wouldn’t back down on their schemes, although he still drove me to the reception.  

I kissed his lips, thanking him for driving me before getting out of the car.  

“I’ll come right after the meeting. Call me if anything happens. And when I said anything—anything, alright?” 

I kissed him one more time, totally swooned by his caring personality. “Okay. I love you. Drive safe, yeah?” 

“I love you too, baby. I’ll see you later.” 

As expected, she invited me just to meet Baekhyun. I was almost fuming in annoyance when they kept laughing at how Baekhyun was not there. Even my ex was laughing with her punchline, “I’m starting to think that the guy on your story was just a random photo you saw on Google.” 

I didn’t want them to think that I was getting affected by their jokes that I knew were half-meant. So, I decided to laugh with them, and I wasn’t ashamed to show them that it was by force.  

Baekhyun texted me to say that he was running late, and if he didn’t make it to the reception, he’d still come and pick me up. I told him that it was fine and assured him that no one was harassing me when he sent: IS SOMEONE BOTHERING YOU THERE???, in all caps. 

The second thing happened when my ex sat beside me and handed me a glass of wine. The smell of the alcohol, although quite subtle, when it reached my nostrils, I wasn’t able to hold back my gag. I peeked at my ex, and gladly, she didn’t see it. 

But one person did. The one who sent me the screenshot of their group chat messages. 

She eyed me with concern when I gagged once again before deciding to place the wine on the table where I wouldn’t smell it. 

Remembering that I wasn’t feeling well this morning, I was about to call Baekhyun, but at the same time, I didn’t want to bother him for a while since he mentioned that it was an important meeting with a stakeholder. I knew he said to call him if anything happened, but I thought that I could still handle it. 

Since it was nearing the end of the reception, more alcohol came into the hall, and I started getting dizzy. I ran to the toilet and tried to stick my finger on my mouth to induce vomit since I’d been gagging and thought that it was a good idea to just let it all out. 

“No—wait, don’t do that.” 

It was Jisoo who sent me the screenshot. She held my hand away from my mouth, brushing away the hair that got stuck on my face as I started breaking into a cold sweat.  

She closed the cubicle door and sat on the cold tiles in front of me. “I saw how you became sensitive to the smell of alcohol. How many weeks are you in?” 

I tilted my head to the side, not having an idea of what she was asking. “Sorry?” 

“Oh,” she smiled sheepishly, “aren’t you pregnant? I’m sorry if you find it offensive. I—” 

I chuckled nervously, not expecting to hear that from her or from anyone. “I probably ate a lot earlier, huh? That it bloats my belly.” 

I haven’t tracked my period due to work, and I got busy when Baekhyun and I decided to re-décor the apartment. But we are careful. I have been taking after pills since we got accumulated on not using protection nor pulling out.  

“Oh, shit...” 

My eyes widened in realization as I remembered the night that Baekhyun came home when I was already asleep. He was tipsy as he met with his friends for a drink, and when he saw me sleeping just with a loose t-shirt and underwear, he initiated intercourse. 

I was tired, so I let him be. I quickly went back to sleep when he finished, and when morning came, I rushed to get ready for work since neither of our alarms went off for some reason, and the afterpill on the medicine cabinet was left untouched. 

Jisoo gasped upon seeing my reaction, “You—you didn’t know?” 

I shook my head slowly, still in faze by the fact that I could be, and a large possibility, pregnant. “I—we were busy. I was feeling normal until today...” 

“I—” Jisoo rummaged through her purse, groaning when she didn’t find what she was looking for. “I usually carry a test with me, but I don’t have it right now. I—uhm, I can ask the hotel clinic if you want to. Or would you want to do it by yourself at home?” 

“I—uh,” I heaved a deep sigh, not knowing what to do but to dial Baekhyun’s number with my shaky fingers. When he didn’t answer, I left him a message, hoping that he’d read it soon. 

Come pick me up, please. Sent | 7:45 PM 

Jisoo stayed by my side as we went back to the gathering. She even got a different chair for me to sit on rather than the seat next to Yunjin. I gave her a grateful smile, and she just squeezed my hand to tell me it was fine. 

I was bouncing my legs for at least ten minutes straight when I decided to tell Jisoo that I wanted to test it now, and she nodded her head, telling me to wait for her while she went to the hotel clinic to see if they had a test kit. 

When she came back, she nonchalantly asked me to go with her to the bathroom as she needed to retouch her make-up. The other girls just waved us off, not really caring about us.  

On the way to the bathroom, I finally received my boyfriend’s reply, and I couldn’t help but sigh in relief. 

You alright? Received | 8:18 PM 

I hastily typed a simple Yes, and his response calmed my nerves a bit. 

On my way. Give me 15 mins max, baby. Love you. Received | 8:19 PM 

I read the instructions carefully and made sure that what I’d done was correct when the result finally showed on the kit. I bang my head on the cubicle’s wall, alerting Jisoo on the other side.  

“Is everything okay?” 

“One line means negative, right?” I asked dumbly, not knowing how to react to this situation.  

“Yes,” Jisoo confirmed, knocking on the door to ask me to open it, and I did. “Is it negative?” 

I handed her the kit, my face blank of any expression.  

She gasped loudly when she saw the two lines, pushing me back inside the cubicle and locking the door. “Congratulations!” 

She jumped on her feet as she hugged my almost limp figure. When she noticed that I wasn’t excited about the news like she was, she looked at me with concern on her face. “Are you not planning on this?” 

I shook my head, biting my bottom lip as I got worried about Baekhyun’s reaction to the news. We both discussed marriage but haven’t gotten further about a child coming into play. 

What if he didn’t want a child like my ex? Will he change? Will he leave me as well? 

Yunjin being unfaithful and breaking up with me was painful, and it took months for me to feel alive again. 

But the thought of Baekhyun walking out of my life was unthinkable.  

I just couldn’t. 

I was beyond grateful to Jisoo when she held my arm as I decided to leave the venue and wait for Baekhyun to pick me up. However, as soon as we got to the table to bid them goodbye, I saw everyone gushing about Baekhyun. 

“I saw you on LinkedIn, and you’re an Executive Director of the company you built, right? What are you doing here? Are you related to the bride or the groom?” one of them asked, resting a hand on my boyfriend’s thigh, and it didn’t fail to make me raise an eyebrow in annoyance. 

“Right! I knew he looked familiar the moment he walked in. I’ve heard that it’s a great place to work. You have an impressive accomplishment at such an age, I must say.” Yunjin even joined the conversation, seemingly immersed in seeing Baekhyun. 

Jessi once told me how Baekhyun has achieved incredible credibility in terms of corporate business, and a lot of multinational corporations have asked him to join their team, but he chose to stay with Junmyeon, his good friend, since grade school. 

Fortunately, Baekhyun brushed her hand away, eyes scanning the place to look for me. “It’s the company of my close friend, and I’m just helping him. And I’m looking for my—” 

“You’re such a humble guy. Can I have your number—” 

“Oh—there you are!” Baekhyun sighed in relief and smiled sheepishly when he saw how unhappy I looked upon seeing the interaction. He walked in my direction and kissed my lips in front of everyone. 

“My conscience is clear, baby,” he whispered to my ear before facing them, whose eyes were wide and their jaw almost reaching the floor. “I’m here to pick up my girlfriend. And we’ll get going now.” 

I forced myself to smile, waving them goodbye, and couldn’t stop the amused chuckle I felt when I saw their incredulous look, especially when Baekhyun intertwined our fingers in front of their faces. 

“Thank you,” I mouthed to Jisoo when Baekhyun tugged my hand as a signal for us to leave the place. I felt sorry because he must’ve been uncomfortable from their questioning earlier. 

Jisoo smiled widely, raising a fist in the air, whispering, “Fighting! And call me.” 

And that made me remember the reality that I have a child in me, and I must tell Baekhyun about it. 

When we reached home, we washed up together and went to bed. I knew it was a long meeting, and he must be so tired, but I couldn’t stop the negative thoughts in my head. And I won’t be able to sleep in this condition. 

He was already breathing heavily, a sign that he fell asleep, and I confirmed it when I raised my head from his chest and peeked over to see his face.  

I huffed, feeling pathetically frustrated with myself. I could’ve told him on the drive back home, but I waited, and now he was asleep.  

I started whining his name to try to wake him up, but he didn’t even budge. I tried kissing his neck since he was a bit sensitive in there, but all I received was a tired groan.  

“Baby... I’m tired. Tomorrow, okay?” 

I didn’t know if it was because of the pregnancy or if it was just all in my head, but when he turned around so his back would face me instead, I exhaled shakily, and tears started forming on the brim of my eyes.  

I pursed my lips so he wouldn’t hear my soft hiccups. It was a petty thing to do, but I grabbed my pillow and went to the living room, settling myself on the couch with a single pillow and a throw blanket.  

I was sniffling when I closed my eyes, and a salty stream of tears flowed to the side of my face, praying that everything would be okay and that sleep would come so I could rest my mind for a bit. 

My eyes snapped open when I felt the space beside me sink and an arm wrapped around my middle. It was still dark outside the window, so I guessed that it was still dawn. 

I was still somewhat hurt when he turned his back on me, so I decided to do the same, having him taste his own medicine.  

“Baby... don’t do this...” he sounded so fed up, and being at the peak of my emotion, I hid my face even more when I felt a prickle in my nose, and tears started welling up again. 

I was normally reserved and wouldn’t make a big deal on things. I’d like to stay calm and think before I open my mouth on a serious matter. So, this was new to him. 

“You know I’ve never said no to sex before, but please, baby, let me sleep for at least three hours, and I’ll do anything you want.” 

That made me sit up from my curled-up position, and he was beyond shocked to see me crying. “Sex?! You thought I was asking for sex? What the fuck, Baekhyun!” 

“No—wait, baby. Don’t cry—oh, my God.” he tried to initiate a hug, but I slapped his hands away, glaring at him. “Why are you so mad at me—where are you going?!” 

I was sobbing violently, trying to push his chest away, when he literally tackled me on the couch when I attempted to walk away. He waited for me to calm down, not saying anything, but would peck the tip of my nose when I would hiccup. 

When my sobs finally ceased, he tilted my chin so he could look directly into my eyes. “Are you going to tell me now why you’re so mad at me?” 

I just sniffed, not answering his question. 

“How am I going to fix it if you won’t tell me?” he sighed, closing his eyes in probable annoyance. 

“Are you getting tired of me?” I croaked, biting my lip when it trembled.  

He rubbed his face tiredly before huffing. “What—” 

“Just say it if you’re fed up with me. I won’t make things complicated, and I will leave you alone.” 

“Baby—do you hear yourself? What the hell is wrong with you?” Baekhyun hated the instances in which he would raise his voice at me, but this time, it seemed like I needed it from his point of view. “Why are you breaking up with me? Did something happen—did I do something wrong? Tell me so I can fix it—at least give me a chance to fix it!” 

“I—” I lowered my head as another set of tears formed. 

I heard Baekhyun sniff, and his voice started to crack. “Baby... please... tell me what’s wrong.” 

I raised my head to look at him, and guilt crashed through me when I saw his eyes turn red and glossy. “Promise me you won’t get angry... please.” 

“You know I would never be angry with you.” 

I gulped audibly before opening my mouth to finally tell him what I should’ve done earlier. “The girl you saw earlier, the one whom I was in the bathroom, she thought I was pregnant because I became sensitive to the smell of wine.” 

He nodded his head, urging me to continue. 

“She asked me to do a test. And, uh... it came positive.” 

Baekhyun’s eyes widened in surprise, and his mouth fell open. “You—we—we’re pregnant?” 

“Yes,” I confirmed his question, anticipating his next action. Is he going to be mad about the unplanned pregnancy? We haven’t even been together for a year. Will a baby be a hindrance to our—his freedom? 

Baekhyun exhaled heavily like he was holding his breath for a long time, “Baby—that’s—you should’ve told me. Is that the reason why you’re frustrated at me?” 

I was breathing heavily, thousands of thoughts running through my head, when he didn’t directly confirm if he was fine with it or if he wanted to be out of the picture. “You’re okay with it? You’re not mad?” 

Baekhyun looked at me like I’d said something I shouldn’t have. “What—why would I be mad about it? We’re having a baby, my love. This is good news! Where the hell you got the idea of me not wanting to have a child with you?” 

I’d like to blame it on the pregnancy this time when I started sobbing, throwing myself to Baekhyun as I hugged his neck tightly. He must’ve sensed my sincere emotion, that I was frightened that he could’ve thought otherwise about the situation. 

Baekhyun hugged my figure, caressing my back and the back of my head to calm me down. “Please don’t ever doubt my love for you. I’ve never loved someone as much as I love you. Please don’t forget that, although I will never get tired of reminding you every day.” 

I cried even more with his confession, wailing: I love you, as I hid my face in his neck, climbing on his lap as I made myself comfortable in his hold. 

Baekhyun showered my face with kisses when I pulled away, despite my cheeks being soaked with tears and my nose probably snotty. He looked at me like I was his greatest treasure. “My baby is such a crybaby.” 

I sniffed, though a smile finally formed in my mouth. “I guess I’m not your baby anymore, huh.” 

Baekhyun scrunched up his nose, nodding his head. “Yeah... I mean, I’d go down on one knee right now to make you my wife instead, but I haven’t bought a ring yet. Will a Ring Pop do for now?” 

I placed a chaste kiss on his lips before laughing. “As long as it’d be strawberry flavor, I’ll say yes.” 

Baekhyun laughed so loud that I had to cover his mouth with my palm as it was still dark outside, and our neighbors might report us if we didn’t tone down our voices. 

“But seriously, babe,” he hummed as he laid me down on the bed and attacked my neck with his lips. “Why did you turn your back on me earlier? I was so hurt when you did that.” 

Baekhyun looked so done with me, but instead of getting bothered by it, I found it amusing how he went on for almost an hour, explaining that he didn’t do it on purpose and he was just half asleep and wouldn’t do it if he was fully awake. 

In the twelfth month, Baekhyun finally went down on one knee. Asking me to marry him with a proper ring adorned in his fingers. Our families and our closest friends were there.  

I couldn’t help but tear up to see them celebrating for us. 

On the fifteenth month, I walked down the aisle to vow to take Baekhyun as my husband. The wedding was rushed, and we thought it wasn't plausible. But a good friend of mine, Jisoo, who is a wedding organizer, made it happen. What are the odds? 

By then, I stopped counting the months and just lived in the moment with him.  

With Baekhyun. 

Baekhyun is different. He proves to me every single day that I’m finally with someone I can feel safe with. Someone who will celebrate my success—our success together. Someone I can lean on and someone who needs me as much. Someone who trusts me as I trust him. Someone who loves me as much as I love him. 

Someone who respects me as much as I respect him. 

I couldn’t be more thankful that I didn’t take my friends’ advice about vengeance. 

Because you know what’s better than revenge? 

Moving on, then finding contentment and happiness. 

It could be at work, financially, family, or in person. Let time heal you, and once you feel like you can take a bath and eat breakfast, keep moving forward and focus on what and who makes you happy. 

You’re going to be okay. I promise. 

It took me a long time, but I finally found the love I’ve always wanted. 

[madalice31]

It’s annoying that I keep seeing articles talking about Aaron Taylor Johnson and his wife and how they’re so flabbergasted by everyone’s “fascination” with their age gap.

🙄

Like literally she was 42 and he was 18 when they met and started dating. Hell he might have been 17 going on 18 but i can’t remember. On one of his first movie projects I might add, like this was before Kickass. And she directed him in that first movie. In fact, by the time kick ass two rolled around I think they were already married. She married him before he even turned 21.

You can’t tell me he was not groomed. That’s just point blank. There has been a power dynamic imbalance since they got together. I mean seriously, he was a year older than her oldest kid.

The white media won’t drag her like the black media dragged Draya tho. They’ll just smile and nod and say it’s okay now that he’s in his 30s.

But let’s not sit here and act like this shit is normal. Notice how she’s had a grip on his career ever since? She’s literally a director and producer in the industry. She has weight. This man barely does anything with a romantic interest and I guarantee he would be in a lot more movies if he wasn’t married to her. And most likely he would have much larger parts in the films too. Like aside from bullet train, he’s had such a minute part in every other movie. My bf and I would get excited to see his name attached to a film, only to watch it and realize he has such a small role. It’s like they use his name for clout. Like I’m still trying to remember when he pops up in Tenant. And his name is never top billed when it should be.

I think Kraven will be the first movie he leads since the A Million Little Pieces movie, and he was directed by his wife in that as well! She overly involves herself in his career. She claims they “take turns” on projects so they’re not apart from each other for too long. But it seems his career suffers the most from that arrangement because again, it’s not like he’s off for months and months on a project. He’s not the lead! So he’s there for maybe a few weeks and he’s back home. Hell in a recent interview she was complaining about being away from him for 6 weeks (the longest they’ve been apart) and how they were “never doing that again.” This man is doing press tours for a project she has nothing to do with and and she’s coming with him to every interview. Like why? Ain’t you supposed to be home with the kids bitch? While he’s doing his own thing for a few weeks? Oh yes, that’s right, she needs to control everything he does. God forbid he’s away from her for long enough to realize maybe he’s not actually happy with her.

He likes to defend her by saying he pursued her but it’s like dude, you think so? You know what that sounds like? The 12 year old student who was raped by his teacher and defended her by saying he pursued and wanted a relationship with her. He grew up, married her, and got her pregnant all while she was in prison for being with him. Guess where they are now? Divorced. So just because Aaron thinks the relationship was his idea doesn’t make it right. She had the responsibility to say no, you’re entirely too young for me. Instead she decided to just “go with the flow” and let “a good thing happen” to her after two kids and a divorce 🙄.

Please. 8 or 10 years apart, I’ll give you that. But 20 to 30 years apart AND you met the person when they were still a teenager? I’m not tryna hear that age is just a number bullshit.

Smh. He’s so far gone tho, I doubt he’ll divorce her. He might pull a Hugh Jackman years from now, but at least Hugh was in his 20s when he got with his much older wife. I don’t think she was able to brainwash him the way Aaron’s wife has done. Plus Hugh and his ex never had kids. I’m sure kids being involved makes it harder for Aaron if he’s even thinking about or thought about leaving. So I guess we’ll just see how the cookie crumbles.

I like him as an actor, but I’ve always found their relationship disturbing. So I wish they would just shut up about it and be low key. Cause one thing they seem to steer clear of talking about is the actual beginning of their relationship and the fact that he was a vulnerable, 18 year old first time actor when they met, literally just as career was starting. And he’s never mentioned about how his family feels about him being with her. Never even made a passing comment saying that they love her or anything like that. Just saying, the signs are there.

The quiet on the set documentary clearly shows how young actors are not protected. In this case he was legal, so she got away with it. Smh. I wish him the best.

[hazelsmirrorball]

Hogwarts Elementary| Modern! Mauraders Era x Reader

parings: Teacher! James Potter × Teacher Reader, Principal! Sirius Black × TeacherReader, Teacher! Remus Lupin × TeacherReader, Teacher! Lily × Teacher! Reader, Teacher! Regulus Black × Teacher! Reader

Summary: It's Valentine's Day in Hogwarts Elementary and James decides it's a good idea to play secret admire with one of the teachers.

a/n: hi! I'm in love with this story I decided to mix something that I've been thinking of doing for a while Abbott Elementary X Marauders Era! So here it is incorporated to the Valentine's Day series. Hope you guys enjoy as much as I did writing it! Also the bold letters mean that they are doing a private interview!

warnings: English isn't my main language so excuse any mistake!

previous imagine

Fourteen Cupid Love Stories Masterlist

The bell rang loudly filling the halls mixing with the loud voices of the kids that were heading towards their classroom. The teachers patiently waited outside the door greeting every single kid that entered.

"Hi! I'm principal Sirius Black. I still don't know how I ended up ruling this school but might I say I love it. Hot teachers, smart kids and the paycheck, being a principal is the best and I welcome you to this lovely school. Here we have one of our annoying second grade teachers, Y/n I'll leave you guys to it and let me say if you need more beauty shoots I'll be in my office" Sirius said while sending a kiss towards the camera.

"Hello!! I'm Y/n L/n. But around here everyone calls me Miss L/n. I've been a teacher here for about four years now and honestly it's a blast. I love the kids, I love the school, I love my coworkers, I love the classes, I love my mood ...Sorry l am rambling but in my defense it's the day of love and l'm in a loving mood today. Let me just get to the point I teach second grade and around here we all love to have fun. Want a cupcake?" She said with a huge smile stretching out her hand with a cupcake toward the cameramen while the kids in the background make cute cupcakes. Her face was covered in frosting and her clothes were covered in glitter.

James Potter smiled excitedly as his first graders entered the classroom holding some valentine cards. When the last student entered, his eyes trailed towards the end of the hall where he could see Y/n L/n handing her kids a lollipop while they entered. He stared at her in aw, noticing her adorable cupid's outfit she had on. He waited a few seconds to catch her eye and waved at her with a soft smile which she happily returned.

"Mr. Potter Jeremy is kicking me again" a kid screamed from inside the classroom making James quickly enter the room to detain the fiasco before it got worse.

James Potter didn't expect to like it as much as he did but having Y/n around made the teaching experience quite refreshing. Y/n was around the same age as James but she had been teaching here for about four years just like her close friend and history teacher, Remus Lupin.

“Mr. Potter, I wanted to inform you that the camera crew just got here today, so don't be surprised if they catch your fine ass" Principal Sirius Black said peeking his head through the door.

"Excuse me?" James asked, raising an eyebrow at Sirius making him wink at him.

"I'm just playing but remember that they...Oh look they are here now! Here we have Mister James Potter. He teaches first grade and he's been working here for about a year, yet he can barely get a hold of his class but we are working on it. So enjoy your time with him. Hottest teacher in the school. Bye" He exclaimed while he left James standing agape in the hallway with a camera crew filming straight at him. He quickly took his glasses off, cleaning them on his dress shirt nervously while the kids screamed as loud as they could in the back of the class.

“First of all, I'm not the hottest teacher here, I'll leave that to Remus Lupin and second of all I have perfect control of my kids" James exclaimed quickly while putting on his glasses and looking at the camera.

"Mister Potter!! Help me, Jeremy is still pulling my hair now" a kid yelled from the back of the class quickly gaining James attention. He quickly ran towards the back of the class and the camera crew quickly behind him. He tried pulling Jeremy off one of the other kids but he wouldn't move.

"Jeremiah, let go!" He said while falling desperately to get his attention.

"I'm not letting go James! She bit me" Jeremiah yelled still not letting go

"First, I told you even thought you are stronger than me to call me Mister Potter. Now let's just try to be in a loving mood, it's Valentine's day, don't you guys want to be in a loving mood?!" James asked desperately, trying to convince the kids to let go of each other. All the kids around them were unphased by the interaction, exchanging Valentine's cards while the fiasco unfolds.

"NO!" Both of the kids exclaim pushing James down towards the floor.

"How are you kids so strong?! Regulus!!

Regulus please, please help me" James exclaimed towards his friend that walked towards the break room. Regulus quickly rolled his eyes entering the classroom and instantly the kids stopped fighting while the ones that were exchanging cards sat down hiding their sweets.

"How?" James mouthed to the camera while watching the kids stay like statues with Regulus.

"I'm Regulus Black, please do not associate me with the principal or I will call the authorities against you. If it were my decision I would have been principal and I would have said no to this little filming festival you have going around here. But since l'm not principal I have to answer your dumb questions, so l'm the other second teacher here at Hogwarts elementary. The only person I don't get annoyed at in this school is possibly James. He isn't the worst teacher in the world but he isn't the greatest. Kids here can be little shits but I have them under control. James on the other hand doesn't. He lacks control and I truly believe he's one of the kids." Regulus said to the camera while moving to the side to let into view a giggling James Potter exchanging cards with his students excitedly.

Meanwhile, Remus Lupin and Lily Evans walked together to the break lounge ready to eat their lunch and enjoy their break. Both of them worked on the second floor with the middle school kids and they were exhausted.

"Good evening, I'm Remus Lupin and I teach seventh grade history. I've been in this school for four year and quite frankly still don't know why l've stayed so long"

Lily sat down taking her food out of her neatly prepared lunch box while Remus took his mug to serve himself coffee. Both of them took in the wonderful peace and quiet that surrounded the break lounge, something that it always lacked. But the peace and quiet was interrupted by the door slamming open and a visually alarmed James coming through, Regulus following behind shortly after.

"I'm so done with those little pieces of sh.. You" he took a deep breath pointing at the cameramen. "Stop following me with those stupid cameras. You're making me seem like I'm a bad teacher” He said while his eves twitched making Remus hide a chuckle with a cough. He continue to drink his coffee attempting to calm himself.

"I don't think they're making you seem like a bad teacher, maybe you're just being one” Lily responded while taking a bite of her sandwich making Remus "cough" even louder.

"Miss Evans, I came to this school the same time James Potter did and it still surprises me that he is still here. There were fifty new teachers and surprisingly the only two left are James Potter and me, I thought he was going to be the first one to leave, yet here he is, still struggling and still not getting the hang of it" Lily said to the camera while fixing the nonexistent wrinkles of her dress.

"Well, I have you know l'm a great teacher! My students and I had a Valentine's Day party, something that didn't even cross your mind to have today. We exchanged some cards, had a dance party and ate sweets. They love me. I love them. And all you did was bore you kids to death today, I suppose" He responded angrily while looking at the peaceful Lily.

"Actually, today we wrote love poems. Something you can actually do to learn since you come to school to learn not to party. But I guess you didn't get the memo since all you did was go to frat parties in college" She said taking another bite of her sandwich.

"Jokes on you I wasn't even in a frat. But I just know your kids wanted lollipops and by the way I gave my kids lollipops and none of them threw them at each other so I believe that's progress" Have said proudly while looking in the fridge giving his back to the teachers letting them see the back part of his dress shirt covered in lollipops.

"Congrats! You are getting better Potter” Remus applauded while placing his cup down.

“But I don't think you should get your kids hopes up with Valentine's Day. Then when they get older they get rejected just like my kids are getting right now" Regulus responded while sitting next to Lily.

"Aren't your kids seven?" Lily asked, raising an eyebrow at Regulus.

"Seven year olds can still fall in love. Lilian" Regulus said while taking a sip of his coffee.

“I already told you, my name isn't Lilian, it's Lily" she said seriously while glaring at the man.

"I will not stop spreading love in my classroom.I love Valentine's Day and no one loves Valentine's Day more than me" James exclaimed sitting down.

"Hellooo teachers!" Y/n exclaimed throwing flower petals in the air while entering the classroom.

"I highly doubt it" Remus responded while looking at his best friend, dressed up in a Cupid costume. She was holding onto a basket filled with sweets while her wings, bow and arrow were neatly placed on her back. Her hair wasn't styled as usual, instead it was adorned with a cute short pink wig that had two heart shaped antennas.

"Happy Valentine's Day to you, and you, and you" She said, handing a beautifully devoted Valentine's Day box to each of her coworkers.

Lily smiled softly, Remus whispered a thanks and Regulus rolled his eyes, but deep down he loved it. Y/n headed towards James giving him a bigger box than the rest. James blushed hard, taking in his hand the gift while Y/n did the same.

"Thank you, Y/n. I appreciate it a lot" He said smiling softly but his smile got wider when she sat next to him.

"You're welcome James! By the way, I love your heart shirt. It looks cute" she said, pointing at James pink heart-shaped dress shirt.

"Thank you! I really like your cupids costume” he said while trying to hide his blush

"Thank you! I wanted to go all out today, I was so excited for the afternoon party I forgot to bring lunch" She smiled at them while opening a water bottle and looking down at her notes to fix anything that was incorrect for the party the school was throwing later today.

"Here, have my sandwich" James exclaimed, planting the sandwich next to her. She looked up from her paper shaking her head.

“Don't worry about it James. You should eat, I can wait until later.” She responded by trying to hand it back at him but he shook his head.

"Have it, I'm not even hungry" James said smiling softly while shrugging trying not to worry her.

"Thank you James! I owe you one" Y/n said, taking a bite while Remus looked at the camera suspiciously while drinking his coffee.

"What? I'm not hungry. My stomach is filled with brownies, candies and cupcakes. Plus the cupcake I have this morning, if YIn hungry I wouldn't mind giving her my food!! Or anyone not necessarily her, I give my food to everyone that wants it, look. Here have this strawberry" James exclaimed while taking out the strawberry he was previously eating and handing it in to a kid that was passing by. The kid stared at James weirdly before continuing walking.

"So, did anyone get anything special from a special someone?" James said, trying to change the subject while they all peacefully ate.Everyone stayed quiet but James anxiously taped his finger on the round table making Lily groan and speak up.

"Well, since you're being nosy my boyfriend got me a beautiful bouquet of rose”

"Oh my God let me see!” Y/n exclaimed, turning towards Lily to see her phone, seeing the beautiful combination of flowers.

"It was so romantic. What did you get?" Lily asked looking at her friend but she simply shrugged.

“The kids gave me some beautiful cards, those that count?" She asked sitting next to her, Regulus laughed making the two girls stare at them.

“It's sad that you want that to count" He said, taking another sip of his coffee.

“Don't listen to Regulus, he's just jealous because the kids didn't give him anything because they are scared of him” Lily said, rolling her eyes.

"My kids love me, they know my second grade is the superior one and they did get me sweets. I just don't like them" Regulus responded, getting a bag of candy and throwing it on the table leaving Lily in shock.

"Well, maybe you'll get something later, the night is still young" James said suspiciously while looking at the camera with a smirk. As if it were by cue a delivery man opens the door holding a big strawberry and flowers bouquet.

“Delivery for Y/n L/n” the delivery man said while reading the card. Y/n excitedly got up taking it in her hands and placing it down on the table picking the card to see from who it was. She quickly smiled at the delivery man saying thanks before he left. All the teachers looked at the bouquet waiting for her to say who it was from.

"From who is it?" James asked while standing next to her with a huge grinch on his face.

"It says it was from a secret admirer " she said, inspecting the flowers excitedly.

Regulus, Lily and Remus stood outside in the hallways with the camera crew Filming them.

"It was James" the trio said at the same time while rolling their eyes.

"This is beautiful! The person that got me this has to know me really well, I love chocolate covered strawberries and don't get me started on these beautiful flower"

" I know her well!!! I got her that gift and went all out! I'm proud of my hard work and the smile on her face is to die for. So ha! I win Valentine's Day" James exclaimed happily at the camera while grinning.

"Breaks over, I need my teachers in their classrooms so they can take the kids to that dumb party Y/n making" Sirius said entering the lounge and getting himself some coffee.

"Nothing you can do will ruin my mood today

Sirius. So I will take that as a compliment" She responded, taking a bite of her strawberries.

"You got yourself that gift? That's sad, even for you L/n" Sirius responded while taking a sip of the drink.

"Actually, it was a secret admirer" she responded not even looking at him.

"James, it was James" Sirius said, looking at the camera in the hallway while taking a bite of a strawberry he had taken from Y/n's gift.

"Also how are you guys enjoying the reality show we have going on here?" Sirius asked, winking at the camera.

"I feel watched and stalked" Regulus responded seriously.

"I didn't ask you. Remus?" Sirius turned his head towards Remus who took the last sip of his coffee.

"This isn't a reality show Sirius it's a documentary for schools with poor funding so I don't think we should be proud of that” He said while standing up and planning his mug in the sink.

"You know what I'm not proud of, the fact I haven't received my Valentine's Day gift yet" he said only for him to hear.

"Now I remember why l'm still in this school" Remus responded to the camera in the hallway.

"Now everyone chop chop. We don't have all day" Sirius say applauding obnoxiously

Everyone started leaving the teachers lounge leaving James to himself to open the box Y/n had given him, he slowly open the box and open his eyes wide when he saw the gift.

"Oh, l've known about James' crush ever since he started working here. But I love seeing the reactions he does when he thinks I don't know a thing about the little gestures he does to me. That's why I decided that I should give something back" she said smiling to the camera holding the gift she had received from him. In the background you could see James dancing excitedly and when Y/n turned around to look at him, he froze waving at her trying to act cool which Y/n responded with a smile while quickly turning to her classroom.

James looked at his kids jumping up and down at the party and he smiled. He looked at the camera men and then down at his hand.

"I'm going on a date today" He said screaming while joining his kids in a dance battle.

Remus looked at James then at her best friend from the other side of the school gym and smiled softly at her.

"You asked him out, didn't you?" Remus said looking at Y/n.

"Yes, I like him" She responded while looking at the dancing James.

"Yeah he's nice" both of them looked at James before he quickly ate shit making the two of them run towards him to help him.

[MASTERLIST]

requests are open, xoxo.

[mrschwartz]

i'm gonna give you guys the story of my life these past couple of months and i need your advice

from the beginning of 2022 to the end of 2023 i worked in a bilingual kindergarten, let's call this school ABC, as a teacher's assistent and i loved it. it was close to my house and i loved the kids and my co-workers SO much, but the pay was an absolute joke and i worked 10 hours a day which made me miserable. (one detail from this school: they changed management in mid-2023 and the new bosses were super conservative and everyone hated their guts; a lot of people were fired or quit, including a coordinator's assistant, let's call her pam, and a teacher, let's call her beth, who went to work together in another school. let's call this school DEF. pam became a coordinator there and beth stayed a teacher)

then i quit bc i needed time to finish my graduation paper and i wanted something a little better salary-wise and with less working hours. my friend from college, let's call her mary, used to work at a school (let's call this school GHI) and they went looking for her for a teaching job, but she couldn't make it work with her schedule, so she recommended me. this was mid-december of last year. i did a cover letter, went through 3 interviews, the whole shabang. they made it seem like the job was mine so i held off sending more cvs around

okay all right. new years arrive. i still don't hear anything from them so i reach out and turns out they had chosen somebody else and didn't even bother letting me know 🤡 so i had just graduated and was unemployed, completely miserable. i started sending my resumé to some schools not hearing back from any, until beth (remember? from up there) sends me a message telling me her school, DEF, needs a teacher. i say i'm interested and pam, who already knew me from ABC, basically instantly hires me

i've been there for almost a month now, and it's been cute. my comute is 1 hour but easy and pleasant and my shift is 4,5 hours which is a blessing and fair i think for my salary being basically the same as it was on ABC. i have only 2 students and they're sweet and i'm working with my friends who i already know

when. a few days ago GHI contacts me to let me know they're interested in me for the position i had not gotten before. and i. want to die now knowing what to do. the salary is Great but GHI is a little farther away than DEF (1h20min comute, which includes bus, which i hate) and i'd have more students (more responsibility) PLUS+++ i'd have to quit DEF, where i've only been for less than a month, and i'd have to do it to my friend pam, who was relying on me for this entire year, let alone leave my students behind

i'm quaking and crying like what do i dooo

[xxlilith]

One Piece Characters As Students (Part 1)

Hellooooo, I’m back with more headcanons 🤭 This part contains ASL :D

Note: My school uses a 0 - 100 grading system, so that’s what I’ll be using 

Monkey D. Luffy

Eats during class (obviously)

Got scolded by science teachers multiple times for bringing food into the lab

Offers his food to teachers when they get mad at him 😭 (it’s ineffective lol)

One time he asked the biology teacher if they can eat the pig heart after the dissection 

Complains very loudly about assessments (if he remembers them)

Never does homework because he doesn’t remember there is homework

Interrupts the teacher with random questions 

Will offer students who sit beside him food if they’re on good terms

Lunch is his favourite subject

Joined the cooking club but does no cooking

Is their professional taste tester 🫶

Would be failing all his classes if not for the other Strawhats

Grades:

Biology: 63

Chopper helps Luffy as much as he can to make sure Luffy at least passes

History: 60

Robin tutors Luffy in history whenever she can

Math: Failing

This man can not do math

The teacher pities him so much and seeing him makes her want to cry

Physical Ed.: 92

I mean, self explanatory 

Only got docked for the health unit because he didn’t understand anything

Sabo

I swear every teacher loves this man

If he forgets homework, he will get away with it because teachers love him

Sometimes he’s very reckless but teachers turn a blind eye to it

Very friendly and approachable 

Quite popular

Well liked, has probably been confessed to but he rejected them

Naturally excels at his courses

I don’t really know what Dungeons and Dragons is, but I feel like he joined that club 😭

Is the sibling that attends Luffy’s parent teacher interviews (sometimes Ace will tag along)

Part of the student council or some kind of student voice group

Grades:

I can’t see him having bad grades, so probably a straight A student with everything over 85 at least

Physical Ed. is obviously his best grade as well

Score: 100

Portgas D. Ace

If the school has a uniform, always wears it “wrong” (untucked shirt, loose tie, etc.)

50/50 chance he is late to morning classes

Falls asleep in class (though not entirely his fault)

One of the popular kids, friendly but almost in an aggressive way

I can see a lot of people crushing on him, but I highly doubt that he’s actually had any dating experience 😭

Tutors Luffy in math but is basically failing himself

Probably the captain of some sports team or something

Would cheat on tests if he was really desperate

Never got caught though, except for that one time in math-

Very into shoes, I don’t know, he seems like the type

Would show off his shoes to friends

Grades:

He’s an average student, so scoring between the 70s and 80s?

Physical Ed.: 97

Got docked a little because of the health unit where they had to present the male and female body

Annoyed that Sabo did better than him

Math: Low 60s

[silverfoxstole]

Paul McGann: The latest twist in his tale

He's spent his career thinking on his feet, so it made sense to improvise his latest role, he tells James Mottram

Published: 20 October 2006 in The Independent

Every autumn, Paul McGann is given an annual reminder of his greatest role. Living in a university town like Bristol, "you can set your calendar by it," he says. "The new student intake has just come in, and they've drunk their first grant cheque and seen Withnail and I... and I know when they've seen it. They usually holler across the street." While Richard E Grant's flamboyant drunk Withnail was the character blessed with the lion's share of memorable quotes, McGann's more introspective "I" still had his moments. He grins at a recent reminder. "The other day, some kid had chalked on the pavement outside my house, 'Perfumed Ponce', with an arrow pointing to my front door!"

Now 46, it's refreshing to see McGann is not precious about the fact that his finest hour has just been commemorated this month with a 20th anniversary DVD. "It's actually very satisfying," he admits. "I can safely say, 'If I'd never done another movie, it would've been all right.'" Still handsome, with his Byronic brown curls, there's a sense of genuine gratitude in his soft Scouse accent. The son of a factory worker and a nursery school teacher, perhaps it's in the knowledge that a working-class childhood in Liverpool does not always lead to such a grand career as acting. The Catholic-raised McGann knows he's been fortunate: accepted into Rada, he got his big break in 1982 alongside his three brothers - Joe, Mark and Stephen - in the West End rock'n'roll musical Yakkety Yak.

"We all wanted to be movie stars," he recalls of his youthful days. "When I was a kid, about 11 or 12, we used to try and bunk into local cinemas to see X movies. Who doesn't do that at that age? This would've been 1972. Maybe an older kid would buy a ticket, then go and open the fire door and we'd watch this film until we were all thrown out. You'd see some hammy old thing, but now and again you'd see a great film - like Klute or Five Easy Pieces. I remember watching Jack Nicholson, maybe not understanding what he's up to but thinking I'd love to do that. He was engaging, charismatic - I was rapt!"

McGann was never going to be the next Nicholson, even if winning the lead in Alan Bleasdale's 1986 BBC drama The Monocled Mutineer boosted his profile. Unlike Grant, he never really made it in Hollywood. "What do they say? It's better to regret the things you have done than the things you haven't," he notes. When he did get cast in major productions, he spent most of his time on the cutting room floor. Almost entirely excised from Steven Spielberg's Empire of the Sun, he saw his part for David Fincher's Alien3 truncated to an almost unintelligible degree and then he was unfortunate enough to appear in Queen of the Damned, the ill-fated follow-up to Interview with a Vampire. "Careers are what they are," he shrugs. "They don't make any sense at all when you look back. We're not in charge of them."

Fate certainly seems to have had a hand in McGann's CV. A knee injury in 1994 forced him to cede the lead in ITV's Sharpe to Sean Bean. Two years later came his one-off turn as Doctor Who, following on from Sylvester McCoy in a US pilot that was set to resurrect the series but ultimately never picked up because the ratings weren't high enough. "We made a pilot that didn't work," he says. "And it didn't work because it wasn't good enough." But given the success of the current revamped show, does he have regrets that he's likely to be remembered - in his own words - as the "George Lazenby of Doctor Who"? "It's impossible to regret. It could've been very different. I would've been there for five or six years... and I'd have earned a shit-load of dough. Life wouldn't have been the same but it didn't happen."

If there's a suspicion that McGann is not ruthless enough to play the Hollywood game, not least because Withnail and I anointed him with a cuddly image, he has set about changing that with his latest film, Gypo. An entirely improvised piece about immigration, he plays Paul, a racist father-of-three living in Margate. Trapped in a loveless marriage, Paul is the vilest character of McGann's career, beginning the film by violently objecting to his daughter bringing home a classmate who, it emerges, is a Romany Czech refugee. "I had to be prepared for him to be irredeemable," says McGann. "He is unremittingly miserable."

Fed on a diet of tabloids and Talk Sport, McGann says his character belongs with the "huge majority of these little Englanders with their easy assumptions. At one point, he talks about Africa being a big county - that's about the level of him." He adds that he didn't want to make him like some "Alf Garnett cartoon" and he doesn't - though he confesses to the fact that director Jan Dunn only came to the set with "broad notions" for the scenes. The rest was up to him. "There wasn't a script to discuss," he says. "That brought me out in a rash, to be honest. That was one of the reasons I thought I had to do this. I couldn't think of any proper, intelligent excuse to turn this kind of challenge down."

Telling the same basic story from three separate perspectives, Gypo is officially the first British film to be registered as a Dogme movie. Given that this manifesto, devised by the Danish director Lars von Trier to purify the film-making process by using only original locations, natural light and so on, is over a decade old, it might seem rather after the fact. McGann nods. "I entered it with a mixture of open-mindedness and healthy cynicism. I mean, they're having us on aren't they? Some of that stuff... c'mon! The more dubious claims for the process about truth and nebulous ideas about authenticity. I mean, what's that about? Films are artifice. We're telling stories on film. At the same time, when it works, there is a real tough immediacy and spontaneity to it, and a punch."

Both frank and funny, McGann is the perfect pub-mate - not least because he is so self-deprecating. Noting that his short-lived time playing Doctor Who has nevertheless given him a place in the show's pantheon, he recalls meeting legendary Time Lord Tom Baker. "We were in opposite voice over studios," he says. "This guy in the sound studio told me he was in, so I went and met him. He didn't have a clue who I was! I found it rather refreshing. He was very charming. He just thought I was some kid off the street. So I thought, 'Let's just leave it at that.'"

Yet as chummy as McGann is, it's doubtful if he'd ever fully open up - at least in interview. Dubbing himself "a miserable bastard at the best of times", laying bare his soul is unlikely to make him happy. Of his brothers, he says, "We get on OK. We get on fine." The last time he worked with them was in 1995's Irish famine saga The Hanging Gale, which the quartet conceived themselves. "The biggest obstacle is getting us all together," he grunts, when asked if he'd consider working with them again. He's better on his sons: 17-year-old Joseph is musically gifted, "one of those swines that can play any instrument", while 15-year-old Jake "has been making funny noises" about following his father into acting.

Such reticence can be easily traced back to the mid-1990s, when McGann had his one uncomfortable brush with the limelight. Caught in the street kissing Catherine Zeta-Jones, his co-star from period piece Catherine the Great, by a photographer, it caused a minor scandal and the press descended upon him and his family. While Joseph and Jake "were really spooked by it" - to the point that they now hate having their photograph taken - McGann admits the gossip "rattled" his relationship with his wife Annie, a former assistant stage manager turned interior designer. "I felt like a kid who was being bullied," reflects McGann.

Since Gypo, McGann has done what he's always done, and worked steadily. He recently completed the lead in Poppies, a film about a playwright who becomes obsessed with the fact his grandfather and two great uncles were killed in the Battle of the Somme that will receive its premiere in November at the Imperial War Museum. And he is currently filming a short produced by Zoë Ball entitled Always Crashing In The Same Car, reuniting with Grant for the first time since Withnail and I. "It's good when we're together," says McGann. "We're still mates. Our kids know each other. Very occasionally we're together in the same place - and then it's difficult to pay for a drink. I like that."

'Gypo' opens today

[vig1lantnakia]

:// LOADING FILE: 𝟶𝟷𝟶𝟶𝟷𝟷𝟷𝟶 𝟶𝟷𝟶𝟶𝟶𝟶𝟶𝟷 𝟶𝟷𝟶𝟶𝟷𝟶𝟷𝟷 𝟶𝟷𝟶𝟶𝟷𝟶𝟶𝟷 𝟶𝟷𝟶𝟶𝟶𝟶𝟶𝟷 𝟶𝟶𝟷𝟶𝟶𝟶𝟶𝟶 𝟶𝟷𝟶𝟷𝟶𝟶𝟷𝟷 𝟶𝟷𝟶𝟶𝟶𝟶𝟶𝟷 𝟶𝟷𝟶𝟶𝟶𝟶𝟶𝟷 𝟶𝟷𝟶𝟶𝟶𝟷𝟶𝟶 𝚉𝟹𝚁𝚉𝚅𝚁𝙰 𝙽𝙰𝙺𝟷𝙰 𝚂𝙰𝙰𝙳 ...

... 𝙿𝙴𝙽𝙳𝙸𝙽𝙶 𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙸𝙾𝙽 𝙵𝚁𝙾𝙼 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝚂𝙸𝙳𝙴: INPUT ACCESS CODE TO PROCEED...

Character Name: Nakia Saad Nicknames: Kia, [ Hacker Name: N1X, Nix ] Place of Birth: NYC, USA Birthday: February 12th, 1985 Sexuality: Panromantic Demisexual Gender Identity: Non-binary ( They or Him ) Zodiac: Aquarius MBTI: ISTJ Occupation: Intelligence Agent, Hacker Languages: Arabic, English, Spanish, Japanese Moral Alignment: True Neutral Love Language: Acts of Service

THE BIOGRAPHY ( very mild bullying tw )

Born to a family of immigrants, the importance of hard work is ingrained into you from a young age. NYC isn't an easy city to grow up in, and you see your parents work through numerous shifts at the hospital, one a surgeon, and the other a nurse, they work day and night to make a living. You are a sharp child from a young age, and even if you tend to cause trouble every once in a while, it's nothing that can stick to you. Your teachers call you too smart for your age, just that you need to focus. It's not that you don't work hard- it's just that the moment you get your hands on your first laptop, you spend nights illuminated by its light. You have always had a perchance for gadgetry, trying to break technology apart, and then enhance it or fix it back up, but now, with your own computer, you feel like a new world has been laid in front of your feet. You revel in it. You are lucky that your parents don't realize the sheer amount of time you spend there, and you learn how to code like a pro when you are in high school. Named sort of a recluse, you keep it to yourself most of the time. Again, some teachers find this worrying, but you manage to fly under the radar long enough, get a friend or two, and live through the various nicknames tackled onto you. You don't care about what the bullies think, but you do enjoy hearing them screech when one day, their entire internet history has been posted on the corridors of the school. Who would have done that? Such a shame, guess they will never find out. You get into a prestigious college as a computer science major, full ride, and you find it much easier than high school. People care less about what the silent kid is doing, and the professors don't particularly care if you show up or not. You learn a lot, and it's during your senior year in college that they scout you. Men in black, most would think, are dressed as older college students. This is your first interrogation in which they give you an offer for a new life, which you are reluctant to accept. You love your freedom too much, you love your hacking, you love learning about things before anyone else. It's the offer to teach you more than that that convinces you, and you sign up to be an intelligence agent. Years pass, you learn a lot, and you grow a lot. Though, deep down, you are that same kid who just likes getting the dirt on people. You fly too high, or too low, whichever way the Icarus myth goes, and you get caught by an underground organization. Highly illegal, who dare to blackmail you into doing their dirty work. All you can do is say yes, and try to weave the threads in the background, to get back at them, to free yourself before the agency catches wind of everything that has been going on. Then, before anything else that can be figured out — you wake up on a ship. And you realize things can get more complicated after all.

THE INTERVIEW

“What is the last thing you remember before arriving on the island?”

The light of the sun bothers them. The sense of scenery feels familiar, even though the last time they were interrogated, it was a sterile room with fluorescent lights. This time, the warmth of the sun burns into their skin. "I was working." It's a simple answer, the calculating glare focusing on the person in front of them. They try to soften it up, knowing apprehension is not the best trait when interrogated. They would know, going off from the number of times they have been in this exact spot. The silence makes it clear the person is looking for a better answer. "It was- just like another day, man. I swear." A huff of breath masked as a laugh. "I was in front of my laptop, coding the night away- trying to catch up on some of the tasks that I couldn't finish back at the HQ." A softened truth. Nakia was not working on anything related to his official job at the agency, but the second job they were forced to do. The ultimatum given to them by the underground organization, once they caught wind of Nakia's other 'hobbies' which consisted of them collecting dirt on the rich and the powerful. They aren't here right now, which makes Nakia unsure how to feel. "I was reaching a breakthrough and then — I found myself with a headache on that goddamn boat."

“Do you think you will be remembered or forgotten?”

A loaded question, one that threatens to raise their hackles. This back and forth, which they have little control over, makes them less likely to give up honest answers. "Depends on how long." Their leg shakes up and down under the desk, they begin with a shrug. "If you mean far into the future? I'll be forgotten. In the great expanse of time and space, I do not fool myself to think I am important enough that people will remember me by name." Maybe their deeds, or the event in which they would whistleblow who they wished, or managed to turn down that organization. However, as it stands, with them being in the middle of nowhere, it seems completely impossible. As much as Nakia wants to go back, they have an inkling it's not going to be as easy as some residents were thinking.

“What do you feel you could contribute to life on the island?”

A practical question, one all of them have thought of for they are stranded here, with little from home but their own skills. They nod, a hum at the back of their throat. "Sure. I have an engineering background - when anything technical goes wrong- or we need a solution to an infrastructure problem, I am the person to call." A little smirk on their lips, their eyes move down to their palm, the crackling of energy that could not be seen, but one that they felt. "Plus, these powers, will only help us further as we try to make a suitable living here." And then, besides the basic needs of shelter, food, and drinkable water, there are also other aspects Nakia is useful for. Namely, solving mysteries, investigating, and digging where people do not want them to dig. They know how to set up a case, how to gather information. Even if they were almost always behind the scenes back at home ( and behind their computer ), it does not feel that much different to look for clues as to why they ended up here, to learn where these powers came from. "I also have a… Useful background when it comes to solving problems. I think it is particularly handy to have here, considering everything."

“Do you think with your heart or your brain?”

There is the true answer, and then there is an answer they are willing to give. Of course, it ends up being the latter that's uttered from their lips. "I think with my brain. I am a scientist at heart." With their degrees in computer science and industrial engineering, this is the most palatable answer that they are willing to give. Not the one where they feel irrationally annoyed at being plucked from where they were, or the revenge that swims in their veins when they think of the organization that dared to blackmail them. There have been decisions in Nakia's life where they acted on emotions rather than rationality, though those have often led to less than favorable outcomes, which is why they do not wish to accept it out loud. "I am a highly analytical person, I like calculating various outcomes, and choosing the best one after." when they aren't wrapped in thoughts of fury or revenge, this is the truth.

“What are you most curious about regarding the island?”

Fingers tap on the surface of the wooden desk, a plethora of questions that have been revolving around their mind, threaten to reach the surface. Tongue pressing to the inside of their cheek, they try to pick one that would make them seem less irritable, less apprehensive about everything. "I suppose- the powers, to begin with." A supernatural feat, one bestowed to each and every one of them- but for what purpose? What was the aim? "And where exactly we are would be good to know." So that they could get out, eventually. When it comes to actual questions they would ask, it would simply be 'Why?', putting them all here, on this island, cameras everywhere, phantom eyes at every corner, without a purpose — it all seems like someone is playing a game on them. A fucked up one, and Nakia does not have any answers yet. They hate this with their entire being.

THE CONNECTIONS ( mostly pre-island! )

- People from another life: Childhood friends / enemies who knew Nakia in high school or university. Before they disappeared from the face of the earth and became an intelligence agent. This could go a few different ways, maybe they kept in contact, and Nakia told your muse they have been working for a tech company, or they did disappear and this is the first time these two would be meeting after almost two decades. - Family friends: Nakia's parents work in healthcare, so anyone they touched / saved / helped would be very interesting. Nakia never wanted to pursue that career themself, and they would be apprehensive about someone who knows their past to this extent. Free to explore. - Government colleagues: If your muse has a job related to the government, maybe Nakia and they could have met up for work. Nakia could have done work on your computer, or database, or any other thing. Maybe your muse knew about what he was doing, or they just told them they were an IT guy. - Actually just an IT guy: Okay, hear me out, maybe they lived close, and your muse actually needed an IT guy. Nakia found this all too amusing, and actually played into it. So now, when you need your laptop to be fixed or your TV isn't working properly, you can Nakia, and they come by. Payment would need to be non-monetary, they'd want homemade food or something like that, but we can discuss. Maybe friends or other stuff can be plotted. - Coffee pals: When Nakia is in a slump, they go to this small café, and spend hours there. Maybe your muse was in a slump of another variety, or they just found Nakia interesting and approached them. This became somewhat of a routine, and they became friends.

[thislovintime]

Photo via Pinterest. (While I'm not sure, I'm guessing this might be from Pacific Hills School.)

“Since September he has been teaching English, math, drama, Eastern philosophy and ‘Rock Band Class’ at Pacific Hills, a private secondary school in Santa Monica, Calif. A college dropout, Peter got the job on the strength of his interview with Dr. Penrod Moss, the school’s director. ‘I like to hire people who are independent and creative,’ Moss said. ‘I was impressed by his personality and his ability to speak.’ […] While Tork the musician still has dreams of one day returning to the rock circuit, Thorkelson the teacher is happily planning his next course, ‘Mao, Marx and Mama.’ ‘I’m doing something important,’ he says. ‘I never do anything less than important.’” - People magazine, April 5, 1976 “[Peter] landed a job teaching English, philosophy, drama, math, and a ‘rock band class’ in a private school in nearby Santa Monica in September of 1975. ‘I had no experience, no credentials. Some of the same qualities that got me the Monkees job got me the teaching job,’ Thorkelson said. His abilities to talk and to get along with people are his strongest assets, he added.” - The Bowling Green News, May 24, 1979 "[A]lso, you have to remember that, in this society, teaching is not regarded as a very important pastime by those people in charge of setting budgets and national priorities and that kind of thing. Because if it were, they’d be paid a vastly greater amount of money than they are. Not, you know, double doesn’t begin to get it. Triple, quadruple, that kind of thing maybe. And the fact that teachers are paid as poorly as they are indicates what the priorities are. Nurses make what garbage men make, that kind of thing. It’s not a, you know, it speaks… well… ill, it speaks very poorly and very loudly about our priorities. That’s not my business in the large sense, all I can do is play the games as they are laid out before me. And having some modest influence in the style with which I play them. That seems to be about it.” - Peter Tork, KTRU, August 28, 1983 (x) “I taught English and social studies. And sure, the kids probably saw me as a Monkee, but they got over that in a hurry. Once I lost my temper at the kids, they’d see I was just like all the others — and I probably lost my temper too many times, since I was in an angry state back then. I have a life now, that’s the difference. I have a spiritual core. I’m not Shirley MacLaine but I believe in greater or lesser worlds and consciousness. Most people think of themselves as cut off from each other; others know there’s a connectedness that can be tapped into.” - Peter Tork, The Boston Globe, August 10, 1989 (x) More about Peter teaching in older posts, filed under Tork teaching. There's a New Dimensions High School Alumni public group on Facebook, and in 2019, various alumni recalled their memories of Peter: - "We were lucky to have known him." - Joanie C. H., February 21, 2019 - "Was a wonderful guy and we [were] lucky to have known him." - Alison R., February 21, 2019 - "I was one of the luckiest student[s] the year [Peter] taught music. Peter, let me rock the violin for the graduation ceremony." - Mark L., February 21, 2019 - Another alumni, Ron M., posted a signed note from Peter, reading: "To Ron don't forget what I taught you best of luck Peter Tork ('Mr. Thorkelson' to you)" And, on a 2018 blog post at the Monkees Live Almanac, one former student, Mark, commented: “Best high school teacher I ever had […]. Tremendous empathy.” (x)

[mattnben-bennmatt]

Matt Damon and Ben Affleck

The Interview Magazine (December 1997)

By Ingrid Sischy

-

With flagrant disregard for the way things get done in the movie business, lifelong friends and fellow actors Matt Damon and Ben Affleck decided to write a movie they could act in. Now that movie—Good Will Hunting, directed by Gus Van Sant and costarring Robin Williams and Ben’s kid brother, Casey—is about to hit the theaters and, lo and behold, it’s an experience not to be missed.

The film is about the dilemmas of choice and responsibility, and the burdens of belonging. It’s the story of a damaged young working-class Bostonian (played by Damon) who works as a janitor at MIT and is discovered solving math problems that defeat even the most gifted students. As he is plunged into the competitive world of academia, he has to decide whether to follow his heart—which his best friend (Ben Affleck) urges him to do—or the self-destructive impulses that are the legacy of his upbringing.

These boys haven’t arrived out of the blue. Damon, who first grabbed audiences’ attention in Geronimo (1993) and then gave a fine performance in last year’s Courage Under Fire, plays the embattled lawyer in Francis Ford Coppola’s recently released The Rainmaker. Emerging from jock roles in films like Dazed and Confused (1993), Ben Affleck was outstanding this year in both Chasing Amy and Going All the Way. With Good Will Hunting, they’re finally going solo together.

INGRID SISCHY: I want to start at the beginning of your friendship. Did you both grow up in the same neighborhood?

BEN AFFLECK: Yes. Two blocks away from each other in Cambridge, Massachusetts.

MATT DAMON: Cambridge is not that big of a town. It’s like the People’s Republic of Cambridge.

AFFLECK: And people of similar political persuasions tend to flock together. Most lefties in “Cambridge County” know each other.

DAMON: And we were basically best friends since I was 10 and he was eight.

SISCHY: How did you meet?

DAMON: My mother is a professor of early childhood development, and she knew Ben’s mother—who’s a teacher of little kids—and sought her out after we moved back to Cambridge. So I was pretty much forced into hanging out with Ben.

AFFLECK: And Matt was a break-dancer at the time.

SISCHY: Can you remember, Matt, what Ben was like in those days?

DAMON: Absolutely. I remember exactly what he was like: gregarious, outgoing. It was no surprise that he grew up into the totally obnoxious guy he is now. Number one, he claims that I never struck him out in Little League. Which is total bullshit—I was the best pitcher in the league.

AFFLECK: That achievement in Little League grows exponentially with each passing year.

SISCHY: I see.

AFFLECK: We’re the warrior and the clown.

SISCHY: And how does that relate to your childhoods?

DAMON: Our childhoods were pretty normal.

SISCHY: But also informed by the worldview of your parents, I assume.

DAMON: Yes. My mother had written some books on war-play and those cartoons that are like commercials for action figures. What worried my mother about those shows was not only that they encouraged violent play, but also that they hampered creativity. So growing up for me was like you’d get some blocks and then you’d have to go make up a game. I was always making up stories and acting out plays; that’s just the way I was raised. Ben came from a more prestigious acting background.

AFFLECK: My dad was in a theater company in Boston for a long time, so I was always around that stuff.

SISCHY: Did you do theater in high school?

DAMON: A lot. I knew since I was 12 that I was going to be an actor. I was originally going to be a baseball player. Tiny Archibald was my favorite player—he’s called Tiny because he’s only six foot one. My father sat me down and said, “I’m the tallest Damon ever to evolve and I’m five eleven. But I’m never going to play in the NBA.” I gave up basketball at that moment and took up acting.

Whatever I did, I wanted to be the best at it. I remember that moment in The Natural when Robert Redford says, “I just want to walk down the street and have people say, ‘There goes Roy Hobbs, the best there ever was.'” So I was talking to my mother one day—this was when I was 16 or 17—and she goes, “Matt, why are you so obsessed with acting?” And I said, “Because someday I want to walk down the street and have people say, ‘There goes Matt Damon, the best there ever was.'” And she said, “Did I raise you? That’s just an egomaniacal pipe dream. How does it help other people?” Of course I hadn’t given much thought to that.

AFFLECK: In fact, in high school I can remember trying to convince Matt’s mother that not everybody in Hollywood was a total liar and scum. I was saying that there are people in Hollywood who have a social conscience, too. I only repeat this years later now that I realize it was a complete lie. [laughs]

SISCHY: Do you think that wanting to become actors in an academic town like Boston was a kind of rebellion for both of you?

DAMON: We weren’t too rebellious. But every time we sat down to dinner, Chris [Ben’s mother] would say, “Why don’t you guys become doctors?”

AFFLECK: I think our parents were concerned because everybody knows that acting is a difficult career. I don’t think they were that happy with the prospect of their kids facing a lifetime of rejection and scraping by for a sandwich and hoping we’d get free refills at the age of 45. But Matt and I were very straightforward about wanting to be actors. I really think that everybody would like to be an actor. Why wouldn’t they? It’s great work if you can get it. The one thing that prevents most people from saying, “I’m just gonna go to Hollywood!” is that it seems unrealistic.

SISCHY: So by high school you were on your way, in your minds at least?

DAMON: We used to have what we called “business lunches” in high school, which meant we met at the smaller cafeteria and got a table—

AFFLECK: —and worked out some business plans. We were really nerdy. So right now we’d like to skip ahead to these slightly cooler years. Otherwise this is going to get progressively embarrassing.

SISCHY: Well, here comes more embarrassment. Do you think there’s a narcissism quotient in wanting to be an actor?

AFFLECK: I’d say it’s the one quality that unites everybody in the film industry, whether you’re an actor, a producer, a director, or a studio executive. You want people to look at you and love you and go, “Oh, you’re wonderful.” It’s a nightmare. Narcissism is the part of my personality that I am the least proud of, and I certainly don’t like to see it highlighted in everybody else I meet.

DAMON: [laughs] But you know, long ago Ben and I convinced ourselves that didn’t mean us, too.

AFFLECK: It’s like all things in life: You have these qualities in you that are awful, and the best you can do is to try to be aware of them and actively try to diminish them.

SISCHY: At this point in your careers, you can presumably see both sides: You can see the ordinariness of who you’ve been, and you can see ahead of you, and fame looming on the horizon, right? Does the fame part seem attractive or horrifying?

AFFLECK: Making movies has become such a golden ring, and it’s all such a big business, that the rewards system has gotten totally out of whack. Suddenly, you’re treated in a manner befitting someone who is actually an important person. You get the best table, you get all this money, you get people saying, “No, no, I’ll pay the check.” It implies there’s a way of treating certain people as if they’re better than other people, and I don’t think you should do that. It’s difficult for me to see the benefits of fame, except that you get the chance to do the stuff you want to do. Aside from that, the only other good thing I can imagine from being famous is that when I introduce myself, I no longer have to go, “A-f-f…” “A-s-s…?” “No, A-f-f, like Frank.” I get so much mail addressed to Mr. Asslick. That really drives me insane.   

SISCHY: [laughs] But don’t you think fame can be not only pleasurable but useful if you want to have some authority in the world and you want people to listen to what you have to say?

AFFLECK: I don’t think actors should have any authority in the world. It’s a scary world when actors have authority. That was the problem with Reagan.

DAMON: Yes, exactly. [laughs] Because somebody is on a television show or in a movie, does that qualify them to talk about an important issue? I have no problem with people who walk it like they talk it, but very few people do. It’s easy when everybody’s paying attention to you to say, “Well, here’s a cause.” But very few actors are moving out of their houses and getting out of their Range Rovers to pick up their fellow man. Those few who do are the real thing, and they usually don’t talk about it.

AFFLECK: Spare us the idiocy and let people who are qualified talk. Instead of listening to what Mariah Carey has to say about world peace, let’s hear from someone who at least has some experience in the matter.

DAMON: Look, I totally believe you should do things to better the world, but oftentimes there’s so much bullshit that just rings so hollow it kinda mucks up the waters. But then there’s a well-known actor I know who has a life goal to change the laws so that tax credits will be given to big corporations for investing in orphanages. He’s got a whole system worked out, but it’s not about him. I think that some actors are more interested in having people think they want to help people than in actually helping them.

AFFLECK: Or in assuaging some sense of guilt because they know they’re overpaid.

SISCHY: I think that often the first thing that happens when someone is a success is they start to feel like a fake, so they need to show how true they are.

AFFLECK: The imposter syndrome. I wonder if there’s anybody who doesn’t feel that way at some time.

SISCHY: Matt, you went to Harvard, right? Did the idea of going there and wanting to be an actor contradict what that place is supposed to be about?

DAMON: Not at all. They saw that I was dedicated to something and that I tried hard at it. The opening line in the essay for my application to Harvard was, “For as long as I can remember, I’ve wanted to be an actor.”

SISCHY: What was your college experience, Ben?

AFFLECK: It was much more choppy.

DAMON: There are few colleges that Ben hasn’t gone to.

AFFLECK: Then I decided that 20 grand a year could be better spent on things like liquor and women. And so that’s the way I went.

DAMON: Ben’s too modest to tell you this, but he’s the most well-read person I know. He’s certainly a lot smarter than I am.

AFFLECK: That’s why we stayed friends: because we lie for each other in crucial moments. It gets you through a development meeting, I can tell you that.

DAMON: “I didn’t want to say anything with Ben in the room, but yes, he did kill somebody, and he feels really strongly that the scene has to stay where it is.”

SISCHY: When you each went your different ways after high school, did you feel in your heart of hearts and in your gut of guts that you would remain friends and end up writing something together—as you eventually did with Good Will Hunting, the movie that opens in late December, that’s got both of you in it, and that’s directed by Gus Van Sant?

AFFLECK: Matt and I had identical interests, so whether we ended up successful or making hot dogs at Dodgers games, we knew we’d end up doing the same sort of thing. The remaining friends part was pretty consistent. We saw each other all the time, we talked on the phone all the time.

SISCHY: Was there ever a period where you lost it with each other?

AFFLECK: Like got mad at each other?

DAMON: [laughs] He cheated on me in ’87. That was a very dark time. But to answer your question: No, we don’t really fight.

AFFLECK: We just pout.

DAMON: Well, you do throw these screeching hissy fits.

AFFLECK: Actually, I’m always self-conscious about Matt and I being boring.

DAMON: We’re constantly accused by people who come in and out of our circle of friends that we’re the most boring people ever. There are people who go, “I got tickets to see so-and-so, and why don’t you guys come?” We’re like, “Yeah, whatever,” and end up at the same bar every night with the same people telling the same old jokes. We’ve always been that way.

SISCHY: And when you’ve had relationships, have you always respected who each other’s chosen?

AFFLECK: There’s respect, but I think you have a false relationship if you pretend all the time that everything’s fine. I think you can only have a healthy friendship with somebody if you’re willing to say, “Listen, man, you’re not fucking picking up after yourself,” or “The person you’re dating is obnoxious.” I think that happens and you kind of accept it.

DAMON: Ben and I’ve lived together in probably 10 different apartments with 10 other people who we grew up with at different times, and the arguments are always the same. For example, I’m a slob and I get yelled at for not cleaning up when the house is a mess. When Ben brings the hookers over, it’s—

SISCHY: Are you roommates now?

DAMON: We were up until a few months ago. We had a place in New York, but we didn’t live there because we were both off doing movies. Now Ben’s living with his girlfriend in L.A. and I just finished working on a film, so I’m going to stay with a friend of mine, Cole Hauser, who’s one of the actors in Good Will Hunting.

SISCHY: Was Ben always the one with all the girls calling?

AFFLECK: That was Matt, really. I was a total failure with girls; it was a catastrophe. It was the girls from the United Way that called me. [laughs] The real story is that I have a problem with the telephone and I don’t return phone calls if I can’t deal with something. It’s not because I’m cool—it’s because I’m a loser and I’m afraid of dealing with something that’s awkward and uncomfortable.

DAMON: Which made one of our roommates mad. He would say, “Would you just call her back? That’s all you have to do.” And Ben would say, “Yeah, I know. I will, I will.” And then the phone would ring again and he wouldn’t take the call.

AFFLECK: Matt’s just better at being diplomatic about these things. 

DAMON: The warrior-and-the-clown thing again.

SISCHY: All right, so let’s move on from the romance to work. How did Good Will Hunting come about?

AFFLECK: While Matt was still at Harvard, I went back to visit him and he was working on a story.

DAMON: I was doing a playwriting class and a theater directing class with David Wheeler, who knew this world that Ben and I both come from. And when Ben came back from L.A. for Christmas, I showed him this thing I’d written and—because he knows David, too—he came into the class and we acted it out. It was a scene from what later became Good Will Hunting. Then, when spring break came around the following March, I went to L.A. to audition for a part in Geronimo, which I ended up getting. By then I had this 40-page thing and didn’t know what to do with it. I gave it to Ben, and he looked at it and said, “This is really good. We should write this together.” And I said, “I know, but I don’t know where it should go,” and he said, “I don’t either,” but we agreed to write it. After about a year, Ben and I started talking one night, and the script began flowing right out. Then we wrote it very fast.

SISCHY: Did you each take different parts of it and write them and then show each other?

AFFLECK: We did some of that when we were apart.

DAMON: Once we started, we really got into a groove. While I was away, I’d write and fax the stuff to Ben, and Ben would fax stuff to me, and we’d write on and edit each other’s faxes. It was basically the same as sitting in a room saying, “No, no. I think you should say that.”

SISCHY: What’s the movie about?

DAMON: First of all, let me preface this by saying we are the worst people in the world at doing pitches. We could make a really good movie sound terrible, and this one’s not very high-concept to begin with.

AFFLECK: The thrust of the movie is that it’s about a kid from a working-class neighborhood in South Boston.

DAMON: He’s an orphan, a born genius, who’s discovered working as a janitor at MIT, and it’s about him being caught between all these different worlds: the world of his friends; the world of the therapist [played by Robin Williams] he comes in contact with; the world of this really amazing woman [Minnie Driver] he meets who challenges him; and then there’s the lure of the world his genius introduces him to, which is represented by this math professor [Stellan Skarsgård]. So he has to face all these different forces that are at work. It’s like a comedy and a drama and a coming-of-age story.

SISCHY: Would you say the film is about your friendship or that it’s in any way autobiographical?

DAMON: It has those elements, but it’s a totally fictional story.

AFFLECK: Telling this story came naturally to us. It wasn’t like we sat down and had a formula. It was much more like: Well, what would be fun to act?

DAMON: We never fancied ourselves writers. And actually, it was a source of embarrassment for us when we sold the script, because a lot of our friends really are writers and can write a lot better than we can, except maybe dialogue. Writing a script is different, though, because to me it’s not really writing. It’s acting, is what it is. We still don’t call ourselves writers. We just kind of go, “Well, I guess that worked.”

SISCHY: When you began the script, was it partly because you weren’t getting the roles you wanted at that time?

AFFLECK: Right. If no one else was going to give us the chance to do the kind of acting we could do, we decided we’d just make this movie ourselves—however we could do it, low-budget, whatever. The whole idea was to have a videotape on the shelf at the end of the day and be able to say, “We made this.”

DAMON: We wrote it right out of frustration. It was like, “Why are we sitting here? Let’s make our own movie.” And if people come to see it, they come; and if they don’t, they don’t. Either way it beats sitting here going crazy. When you have so much energy and so much passion and no outlet for it and nobody cares, it’s just the worst feeling. And there are hundreds of thousands of people like that in L.A. right now. This whole “I’m too cool to care” thing you get among young actors in this country is so weak and stupid and played out, and it just brings everybody down. You shouldn’t be too cool to care, for Christ’s sake. You should be full of vim and vigor, and trying to do everything you can to make a change.

SISCHY: What happened next with the Good Will Hunting script?

AFFLECK: We are living proof that fortune favors the fool more than once. We showed it to our agents and various other people—

DAMON: And it literally turned into a four-day event. It started on a Monday, and by the Thursday night there was an all-out bidding war for the script.

SISCHY: That was about three years ago. What was going on in your lives at the time?

DAMON: My engagement* hadn’t worked out, so I was living with our other buddy, Soren.

AFFLECK: I had broken up with my girlfriend and I was sleeping on the couch of their apartment.

SISCHY: And career-wise?

DAMON: For five years or so, our bank accounts would get down to the point where we needed to get a job and another job would come along—although it wasn’t always a lot of money.

SISCHY: Did you help each other out from time to time?

AFFLECK: Oh sure, if either of us needed money he could borrow it from the other. Neither one of us ended up taking. It was never one-sided.

DAMON: If one kid had enough for a candy bar, then the candy bar was bought and split in half—that’s just the way it’s been.

SISCHY: Did it suddenly feel surreal having all those meetings?

DAMON: It was the first time we realized how Hollywood works. We’d both gone in for a lot of auditions, but when you actually have something that people are trying to buy from you, it’s a whole different thing.

AFFLECK: It was wild. We were kind of giddy. We would come out of a meeting with both our heads to the phone waiting to hear the newest offer. And the offers kept going up. You know, it would be, “And now Castle Rock’s in…”

DAMON: It was like we’d won the lottery.

SISCHY: Were you scared it was going to fall apart?

DAMON: We were afraid on a human level. We were talking about the difference between eating Spam every day and being able to buy a three-bedroom house with a pool table and new cars. So here we are, and we sell the script to Castle Rock.

AFFLECK: The idea was to do what was best for the movie, which was to get it made. But after a year, we had a falling-out with them and they gave the script back to us with a 30-day turnaround period, which meant if we didn’t sell it within 30 days they’d get the movie back and would be able to do what they wanted with it. It was either make it with who they were asking us to make it with or take this risk. We were basically being fired and offered tickets to the premiere of this thing we’d put three years of our lives into, and which was now starring—

DAMON: —someone who wasn’t us. So we sat down with Chris Moore, our producer, and said, “What are we going to do?” Thanks to Chris, Miramax came to the rescue. Gus Van Sant knew of us—my brother, Casey**, had acted in To Die For [1995]—and we heard he wanted to direct Good Will Hunting. We loved the idea, because we respect him so much. Gus has this way of delivering earth-shattering news in the most disarming, nonflustered flat monotone. “Yeah, I want to direct it,” he said. “That’s if you want to do it. OK. Bye.” So, as Ben said, fortune was in favor of us fools—and we’re happy.

-

[NOTE: This interview seems to have a couple of inaccuracies. *Ben was the one who broke off his engagement; **Casey is Ben's brother.]

[danganronpa-abandoned-hope]

Danganronpa: Abandoned Hope Episode One Script

here's the script for the first episode, as promised! check under the readmore :3. Do remember that it's still a "rough draft", so there may still be some typos and unintentional grammar mistakes. please be constructive with any criticism.

Episode 1, February 13th

Mysterious voice: good morning, sir. We’re very appreciative that you’ve come to talk with us today. We understand that you likely have a very poor opinion of us, but rest assured we have no intention of harming you or your friends. W- No, won’t hurt the young lady here either. We just need your account of the events that took place. Yes we’ll be interviewing her too, so your honesty is of the utmost importance. The sources we have are flawed, some clarity is all we ask. You can provide this, can’t you?

????:: …. I… suppose ….

Mysterious voice: splendid! Could you introduce yourself before giving your account? for the record of course.

????: …. My name is Adaleus Valker. I attended the academy under the talent of “ultimate waltzer”. My talent encompassed everything from organizing events, hosting parties, and of course actually dancing. Admittedly I feel more pride in the hosting part of my talent rather than the dancing part, however the school was looking for a dancer, not a host. The talent program for my year sought to implement pairs with similar talents. I was a last minute addition; the person who originally held my talent couldn’t attend. 

Adaleus, flashback: I still remember the day before it all started. February 13th. We were snowed in so classes were canceled. That was good news to me, I never liked waking up early. Although this morning I stayed in a little too long 

???: *sounds of knocking* Adaleus you in there? It’s noon, wake up!

Adaleus, present: oH SHI *answers door* good morning Mrs Sasaki

Narration: Nozumi Sasaki, the well respected headmaster of this academy. Back in her day she was the ultimate linguist. She’s very good at her job, both as a translator and a headmaster, but unfortunately that means she’s overbearing as hell sometimes.

Sasaki: … Good afternoon. Adaleus I know school isn’t in session today but could you at least wake up at a decent time? 

Adaleus: ah… that’s my bad

Sasaki: just try to get to bed at a decent time tonight, wouldn’t want you to be groggy tomorrow 

 Narration: And with that she walked off 

Adaleus: geez, if I knew I’d get reprimanded like this I would’ve opted out of staying in the dorms

Narration: We were given the option if we wanted to stay in the dorms or not, most students opted out since it’s quite the trek down to the village, leaving only the ultimate class and the headmaster as the only people in the school dorms.

Eun: Hey you, you’re finally awake. I was looking for Sammie so we could get some lunch, wanna join?

Narration: that’s Eun Kocur, ultimate animal trainer. She specializes in birds and is currently keeping chickens and pigeons. We’re pretty good friends. Last month she dragged me along to a bird show her pigeons were competing in. They all won, of course. It would be weird if they didn’t.

Adaleus: yeah sure, food sounds good. 

Narration: we walked over to Sammie’s shared lab, passing some fellow students along the way

Eun: oh hey Umeko what’s up?

Umeko: oh hey Eun! Not much, how about you?

Narration: Umeko Ongaku, ultimate Chorist. She used to be so quiet that it was startling to hear her speak, let alone sing. Especially since she has such a deep voice. Sometimes I’d play the accompanying track for her choir if the usual accompanist couldn’t.

Benjiro: oh? who's there?

Narration: And that’s Benjiro Sasaki, ultimate instructor. One time he mentioned how he was originally going to be a teacher, but disliked small children so much he decided to go into lecturing instead. He really dislikes being singled out due to his blindness, and well kids aren’t necessarily known for their tact. His service’s dog is named Mina. Sometimes we joke about how she’s more sociable than he is. 

Eun: it’s just me and Adaleus, we’re getting lunch

Benjiro: Oh that makes sense, it’s like 12:10 right?

Adaleus: *i checked the clock on the wall* That's actually accurate. How did you do that?

Benjiro: I got a new watch

Adaleus: what? But I thought you were bli-

Umeko: it’s specifically for blind people, dumbass. The face of the watch has raised markers so that you can feel the time

Adaleus: *takes a closer look* oh that’s neat! Did you get it for him?

Umeko: yep! It was supposed to be for Christmas but it came in late. Man I’m such a bad girlf-

Eun: shhh shut up Mrs. Sasaki’s coming 

Umeko: Eep!

Narration: an air of awkward silence befell us as Mrs Sasaki walked by

Mrs Sasaki: hello

Eun: hiya 

Umeko: g-good afternoon 

Adaleus: hello 

Benjiro: hi mom

Misa: *quiet woof*

Narration: Mrs. Sasaki didn’t know that Benjiro and Umeko were dating, and quite frankly neither of them wanted her to know. She’s overbearing as is, I couldn’t imagine it would end well if she knew.

We parted ways with Ben and Umeko, only to run into someone else.

Maricella: hey hey hey Adaleus I gotta talk with you for a sec

Narration: Maricella Tai, ultimate knitter. It’s rare to see her not working on a project, and even rarer to see her without her knitting needles. Everyone here has at least one knitted item from her, currently she’s making everyone blankets. She often jokes about how her knitting needles could be used for self defense in emergencies.

Rina: you didn’t even need my help finding him

Narration: Rina Bellerose, Ultimate Ballerina. I share a talent lab with her. Sometimes we help each other practice for events but to be honest we’re pretty distant. Quite frankly I think she dislikes me quite a bit, but it’s rude to assume that of people.

Adaleus: oh hi what is it?

Maricella: ok so I started your blanket and I was using this one specific shade of blue but I ran out of it completely, is it okay if I use a different shade or would you rather it stay consistent?

Adaleus: oh yeah it’s fine if it’s different. Hey maybe that could be the pattern. One shade of a color followed by a second shade repeated?

Maricella: I. Like. Your. Thinking!! Cmon Rina let’s go!

Rina: you don’t need to run everywhere you know- 

Narration: and thus the sapphic’s left as quickly as they appeared. Finally we made it to Sammies lab. I could hear the radio through the door, playing some music I didn’t recognize. Eun placed a few firm knocks on the door.

Eun: Hey Sammie! We’re gonna get lunch now

Sammie: o-ok hold on a sec!

Narration: the radio was shut off and replaced with a shuffling of sorts. Before long the long anticipated Sammie showed up.

Sammie: ok let’s go!

Narration: Sammie Usuro, ultimate tailor. He’s rather proficient at his talent, usually having a backlog of requests for outfits and fittings. Though for some reason whenever I need my clothes repaired he always gets to it right away. He broke his leg last winter break after falling off a ski lift.

Adaleus: Hey Sammie! How's your leg feeling?

Sammie: ah it’s doing fine. Doctor said that the cast could come off in as little as two months!

Eun: that’s still quite a bit of time

Sammie: Well it’s better than losing the leg due to gangrene. Let’s go get lunch.

Eun: What were you guys thinking about? Personally I could go for anything right now.

Sammie: Honestly that new restaurant down in the village sounds really good.

Adaleus: It does, but how are we gonna get there?

Eun: oh! We could take a sled down then just stay the night in town. We can come back up when school starts back up!

Sammie: Then it sounds like a plan!

Narration: we made our way to the elevator. Yes it was a snow day, and yes eating out was a Saturday thing, but dammit that barbecue place sounded really good. Unfortunately there were issues surrounding the elevator:

Simire: AUUGHRRHR OPEN UP!!!

Narration: Simire Rohim, ultimate badminton player. The winner of several awards and championships, often gone for weeks at a time to play in games. It was… very surreal to see this well respected athlete struggling with the door so much 

Adaleus: What… is he doing?

Icarus: I left my pencil case in a classroom downstairs, but the door to the elevator/stairwell is locked for some reason.

Narration: Icarus Onassis, ultimate volleyball player. He used to be just as into volleyball as Simire was into badminton, but after a season he completely lost interest in sports as a whole. Now he only plays during talent festivals and tests.

Eun: Simire I doubt shaking the door is gonna make it work

Simire: well what else am I supposed to do? 

Eun: maybe get Mrs. Sasaki and ask her to unlock the door?

Simire: oh *leaves to go do that*

Eun: Hey, do you think if we shake him it’ll get his brain to work?

Icarus: hey Don’t make fun of him behind his back!

Sammie: that’s rich coming from the king of shit talk himself

Eun: So would it be ok if I said it to his face? 

Icarus: you-

Mrs Sasaki: What's the problem here?

Simire: the door won’t unlock and Icarus left his pencil case downstairs.

Mrs. Sasaki: Oh I Must have forgot to unlock the door, my apologies.

Narration: but when she went to unlock the door, her key didn’t work anymore

Mrs. Sasaki: That's… odd. It must be the cold weather messing with the locks. I’ll call the locksmiths and have them check out the doors as soon as possible.

Adaleus: damn, so no take out :(

Mrs. Sasaki: Were you really going out to eat in this weather? There’s 100 cm of snow outside!

Eun: well why else would we have the sled?

Mrs Sasaki: that’s for emergencies only, go make yourselves something to eat in the kitchen 

Sammie: :(

Narration: burdened with an unbearable sadness, we made our sorry ways to the kitchen. 

Artemisa, holding a basket of produce: hey are you three getting lunch too?

Narration: Artemisa Spicer, ultimate food chemist. She’s somehow both the most and the least organized person I know. She always has her mask on since she's always in and out of her lab or the kitchen. She was in charge of catering a party I was planning once and she did an excellent job, despite her odd schedule.

Sammie: yeah.. Mrs. Sasaki wouldn’t let us go out to eat

Artemisa: There's like 100 cm of snow out there and you can barely walk!

Eun: yeah but like that’s what the sleds for

Artemisa: no it’s not! I’m making a bunch of soup for lunch anyways, just have some of that.

Adaleus: fiiiiiine 

Narration: we followed Artemisa into the dinning area. Artemisa slipped into the kitchen, leaving us with the other students waiting for lunch.

Gigantia: heyyy mantits McGee what’s up!!!

Narration: Gigantia Ader, ultimate Embalmer. I’m not very knowledgeable of her talent, I personally have seen enough dead bodies to last me a lifetime, but those in the field apparently respect her work greatly. Her personality however…. 

Adaleus: Gigantia we’ve talked about this… 

Fatik: can’t you go a day without harassing someone?

Gigantia: hey tits aren’t inherently sexual!

Fatik: you’re pleading your case poorly

Narration: Fatik Lemaitre, ultimate taxidermist. Again, unfamiliar with the field however they don’t tend to make people as uncomfortable as Gia. They’re often rather cranky though, especially with the bad weather recently.

Juniper: Hey, stop talking about badonkers! Lunch is ready, we made soup!

Narration: Juniper Caito, ultimate orchardist. During the tragedy they cultivated hundreds of orchards, forests, and farms. They’ve probably improved the world the most out of any of us just on the basis of food production alone. Their talent lab is full of plants, I'm surprised that Artemisa gets anything done. 

Fatik: oh what kind of soup is it?

Juniper: soup flavor

Gigantia: oh boy my favorite 

Artemisa: there’s also fresh bread in kitchen if you want it with your soup or a sandwich or something 

Adaleus: Aw fuck yeah bread!

Eun: breads not that good though

Adaleus: sounds like someone’s never had good bread

Eun: whatever 

Narration: the soup flavored soup with the bread shaped bread was very good for lunch. Eun left to go do her own thing, so me and Sammie went over to the library to hang out a bit more. Since it’s basically the entertainment center, someone is always hanging out there

Lapis: oh hey guys what’s up!

Narration: Lapis Ongaku, ultimate soloist. Almost the polar opposite of sister, he’s as loud and fun loving as anyone with the title of ultimate center of attention. He has a tendency to go off and do his own thing, which gets on a lot of people’s nerves. 

Sammie: oh we were just gonna hang out here! That’s ok right?

Lapis: yeah yeah of course! I wasn’t doing anything too important anyway, the internet isn’t working.

Sammie: oh that's odd, then what are you doing on the computer?

Lapis: playing chess against the computer and losing horribly.

Adaleus, thinking: looking over at the computer I witnessed the worst chess strategy I have ever seen play out. It was almost funny 

Sammie: Maybe you should play something else. Oh, how about we play uno? That’s easier!

Lapis: Aw fuck yeah i’m a pro at uno! You’re gonna be sorry you ever challenged me! Then I’m gonna be sorry cause I hurt your feelings.

Narration: we played cards for a couple hours, chatting with people coming in and out of the library. Eventually we went and ate dinner, which was just leftovers. Heeding Mrs. Sasaki’s warning, I went to bed soon after. Though to be honest, had I known what was about to transpire… I don’t think I would’ve gone to sleep.

✨you can now watch from Eun’s Perspective✨

Narration: Well lunch was eventful, it was fun to see Fatik throw a bread roll at Gigantia after one too many puns. Even funnier to see her catch one with her mouth and swallow it whole like a snake. Now what to do now…

Lapis: oh hey Eun! Umeko wants to talk to you

Eun: wait why?

Lapis: idk, she said it’s a girl thing, and since I am not a girl I can’t be privy to this. 

Eun: makes sense, where is she?

Lapis: she’s by her room, probably, she might’ve moved, it’s like a floor it can’t take that long to find her

Eun: fair fair, I’ll go find her

Narration: lapis was right, she was outside her room. Her nameplate is somewhat shiner than the others since they got her name wrong at first. They got a lot of people's names wrong to be honest, how hard is “Eun” to remember geez.

Umeko: oh good you’re here

Eun: Yeah, what did you need? Lapis was really cryptic.

Umeko: yeah ok so uh you know how Valentine’s Day is tomorrow? W-well I wanted to get Benjiro chocolate, but we’re snowed in, so I figured I’d ask Artemisa for help to make them! But she gets really intense when cooking so I kinda need you there for moral support!

Eun: Wait, you’re scared of Artemisa? All 165 cm of her?

Umeko: I’m related to Lapis, I know damn well it’s the short ones you need to look out for! So are you helping or not??

Eun: Well of course I am! Gotta support the gal pals even if they are sniffing cowards

Umeko: aren’t you scared of crickets

Eun: hey! they're freaky little bastards who know and resent their place in the food chain!

Umeko: yeah right, lets go

Narration: we went down to Artemisa’s lab and luckily enough she was down to help Umeko with the chocolate. I did as I promised and stayed for moral support, but unfortunately I became privy as to why Umeko had reservations about this.

Eun: hey why’d you make me put my hair in a ponytail?

Artemisa: the twin tails are unsanitary. Whenever you lean forward your hair gets into anything you’re working in, and I’d prefer it if your hair didn’t transfer germs from your lab into mine.

Eun: Firstly, domesticated pigeons are very clean animals! 

Artemisa: humans are “clean” creatures and yet food safety still applies to them

Eun: But then why didn't you make Umeko change her hair? Or change your hair for that matter?

Artemisa: because her hair isn’t long enough to warrant the concerns I have about your hair. And I don’t lean over countertops with wild abandon

Umeko: Will you guys stop arguing? I’m trying to focus.

Eun: Oh sorry! 

Narration: we finished the chocolates without much incident besides the great hair debate. I even got some of the candy as a reward! They made a variety of flavors, so there's gotta be something in there that Ben will like. Though considering his sour attitude, I can’t be sure that he’ll appreciate anything sweet.

[heaven-s-black-box]

Just Kiss pt.1- Destiel

Return to File

Recovery date: November 26th, 2020

Description: Kindergarten teacher Dean is crushing on some of this students' uncle. According to the students, they really just need to kiss.

Notes: You can find the second entry here.

Word count: 858

Back to directory

If you’d asked a young Dean Winchester what he was going to be when he grew up, he’d answer “A rockstar or a Mechanic”. If you’d asked him back in highschool, he might’ve said a firefighter or something like that. At no point in his life would he say a teacher, much less a kindergarten teacher. In fact, for most of his life, Sammy had been the only kid he could tolerate. 

Sammy, or Sam as he preferred to be called, would say Dean over exaggerated his dislike of children. But he would say Dean’s view of children definitely changed after he met Lisa, who had a son. Dean and Lisa met when her son was three, a few years after he’d graduated highschool. After they broke up, a part of him missed spending time with such a small and innocent being. Not that he’d ever say it out loud again, it sounded a little creepy when he told Sam. 

Now, three years after finally completing the teachers program, he spent his days surrounded by kindergarteners. It was a lovely experience, watching them play and colour together, he loved it… Most of the time.

“Mr. Winchester!” Came a shrill cry from the reading corner. “Bel stole my book.”

He’d taken a senior kindergarten class, hoping that they’d be a bit more mature than his previous junior class. He often asked himself why he thought the children with more self awareness would be easier.

“Belphegor, was Jack reading that book? You know we don’t take other people's things,” Dean sighed, trying to keep his voice even.

“He can’t even read it!”

“That doesn’t answer my question. Was he holding the book?”

Belphegor pouted and hid the book behind his back. 

“Come on,” Dean sighed, kneeling down to the boys level, “Give it back. Maybe this time ask to use it once Jack is done?”

“Fine.” Belphegor held the book, a small collection of fairy tales that Dean recognized from the reading circle collection, out to his brother. “I didn’t want it anyways.”

“Then why did you take it?”

“Doesn’t matter, I’m giving it back.”

Dean opened his mouth to try and coxe an answer from the elder twin, when he was called again from across the room.

“Mr. Winchester! Can we see a picture of a horse?”

---

“Alright, cubbies look clean, let’s head out!”

Just as Dean began to lead his line of six year olds, the bell rang and the older children rushed out of their class to the doors. Dean pulled his line over, and they stood by the wall waiting for the flood to pass.

“They're like animals,” came a voice of awe from the back of the line.

“Claire! That’s not nice.”

“She’s right,” Krissy said from somewhere closer to Dean.

“Keep this up and I’ll have to talk with your parents, you two,” Dean huffed. “Let’s go, remember to make sure I see your parent before you go.”

---

“Alright you three, do you see-”

“Hi uncle Cass!” Claire yelled from beside him, and he swore he almost went deaf.

“Claire please don’t yell,” he huffed, as he looked out to find the man.

Sure enough, Castiel Shurley was making his way over from the parking lot. He waved back at Claire and Jack.

Dean had first met Castiel, or Cas as he preferred to be called, when he came to a parents teacher interview for Jack and Belphegor. He was the boys and Claire’s uncle, although he wasn’t entirely sure how he was related to the boys. Cas usually only picked the trio up when they had plans, which wasn’t often. Something to do with his job, which all Dean knew about was he wore a suit.

Speaking of his suit, Dean’s heart nearly stopped when he noticed Cas was missing his usual trench coat.

“Hello Dean,” Cas smiled slightly.

“Uh- Hi… Cas. How are you?”

“I’m doing well.” He looked down just behind Dean, causing the teacher to remember he was holding back the kids. He dropped his hand and coughed awkwardly. Jack ran forward and tackled his uncle. “I hope they haven’t been any trouble lately.”

“Nah, not really. Well… I think Belphegor could work on his sharing, and Claire needs to work on being polite. But other than that, nothing that needs immediate work.”

“I see, I’ll talk with Kelly and Jimmy.”

“Can we go to the playground?” Belphegor interrupted.

“Only for a bit.” The kids ran off, leaving Cas and Dean.

“So, you guys got plans?”

“Yes, we’re having a family dinner. Unfortunately the task of getting everyone dressed and to the restaurant,” Cas sighed.

“Well, I don’t envy you there.”

“Yes.” There was a brief pause before Cas spoke again. “Dean, I was wonde-”

“Can we go yet!” Belphegor called from over by the playground.

Cas sighed, “Coming!” He turned back to Dean. “Well, it was wonderful seeing you again. Goodbye Dean.” He waved as he turned back to his charges.

“Bye Mr. Winchester!” Jack called, and the other two just waved.

“Bye kiddos!” He waved back, watching them head off down the street.

“So that’s Castiel?”

“Shut up Benny!”

[a-student-out-of-time]

Tell you about myself? Alright, fair enough. What do you want to know?

You can start from the beginning if you want.

All the way back, huh?

I had a pretty average childhood. My Dad was away a lot of the time running his paper, writing articles and collecting interviews, so it was just me and my Mom most of the time.

My mom...well, she and I used to get along when I was a kid, but after I grew up, she started getting...weird. She kept telling me “You’re not as cute as you used to be,” and she kept complaining about how Dad didn’t love her anymore.

That is weird.

Yeah, and I didn’t feel like being alone with her after that, so when I was 12, I joined my school’s newspaper club. I thought it would just be something fun to do, but I got really into it.

I’d find stuff that was going missing, teachers stealing snacks from the students, a lot of people came to me to help them find missing items or even missing pets. And all that was before I even turned 15.

The hardest was probably when this man came onto school grounds, looking like he had something planned. The teachers told us all to hide, but...I couldn’t. And I made what was probably a dumb decision.

What’d you do?

...I caught the guy in the hall, threw some papers at him and got him to chase me into the gym. After that, I managed to find a baseball bat, and when his back was turned, I knocked him out.

Wait, seriously?! He could’ve really hurt you, or worse!

I know, I know...my Dad gave me an earful after that.

But I’m proud of what I did. I like helping people, however I can.

And I appreciate you helping me.

But what makes you so sure that my Mom can’t be behind this? You keep talking about how women like her aren’t the real threat.

*Sigh* And that brings us back to my mother.

Remember how I said she was complaining that Dad didn’t love her anymore? Well...turns out she was cheating on him with another man.

If she was unhappy, she could’ve just asked for a divorce, but no, she had to go and do that! And I just happened to walk in on them one evening, and...

You’re shaking...

...Sorry. I didn’t mean to get worked up.

But yeah, I confronted her about it...and she said there wasn’t anything I could do. That I couldn’t get in the way of her happiness.

Dad was away, and I knew how much he loved her, even if he wasn’t around as much as he would’ve liked. I was scared he wasn’t gonna believe me if I just told her.

So...I decided to make the hard choice, and gather evidence of the affair.

You did that against your mom?

Of course! She broke my trust, my dad’s trust, and all she cared about was her own happiness.

And after I got enough evidence, even some pictures, I found out who the guy was. I thought it was just a co-worker of hers, but it turns out he was Kajiwara  Akihiro , the son of the CEO of a major company.

And guess what? The guy was already engaged.

Sounds like a real winner.

No kidding. When I gave the evidence to Dad, not only did he and my mom split up, he was prepared to take on that whole company himself.

The CEO, his son, all the top brass took us to court and tried to have our paper shut down. They used every dirty trick they could against us, everything in their arsenal.

And Dad actually managed to use that to his advantage. They were a little too transparent, and he managed to uncover all kinds of corruption in their inner workings.

What about your mom? What’d she do?

She was in court too, and the whole time, she kept trying to make it seem like my dad was the bad guy. That he treated her like shut, abused her, stole from her...y’know, projecting.

As soon as Kajiwara was bankrupt, she folded. Her boyfriend wasn’t gonna come save her and all she did was cry. It was pretty pathetic.

And after that whole debacle, Hope’s Peak offered me a chance to join Class 76.

That’s quite a story, Esumi-san.

Yeah. So, maybe I am a little biased, but that’s how these sorts of women tend to act. They rely on their rich boyfriends or husbands to come save them, and as soon as they’re finished, they cave.

...Man, I didn’t even really think about it until now, but I try to help my dad get divorced and a major company gets shut down on fraud, embezzlement and exploiting their workers. Crazy, huh?

Honestly? I get it.

[disappearenceofsomeoneelse]

within that first winter I found you

20TH DECEMBER , 20XX — FRIDAY. School had just finished, and like everyone else, all were excited at the thought of winter break. For it was the time of the year where you got to hangout with your friends and family after finishing up exams, whisking away your worries for whatever a kid could have. You’d have all the time you need to go out and do something…

Quite the contrary for the kid sweeping off whatever trash his classmates left behind, no?

Instead of being outside the building already, he was instead stuck inside his classroom, cleaning up whatever disorganised mess his peers had decided to challenge him with today. From shuffling tables and pushing chairs under desks, to picking up dropped books yet to be placed back in their actual shelves, even going far as to picking up lost items that somehow even gotten under places it shouldn’t be.

How’d he even land here in the first place? What, did he just decided to take one for the team and offer himself to do this even though it was so clearly pointless they’d even care for him?

Well, for Winnie Bosko, yes, yes that was the case.

For an 11 year old boy who had recently moved here from an entirely different city, he was one of many regular students that did regular stuff kids do, like school and such. And all he wanted for this year was to have a normal life. But when you’re practically moving for what feels like every other year, he’d be stupid to think this year would be different. It’s practically the same each time: he introduces himself towards his class, he becomes well loved by his teachers and peers, and he makes some friends midway through the year only to leave them behind weeks later. And of course, none of them ever contacted him again, not even after he sent letters and mail their way. Practically left on read, the poor boy.

It didn’t help that this year wasn’t even decent for him, he basically just got ignored the entire year. If he wasn’t helping someone, nobody would’ve known him at all. That much was already obvious. Nobody came to him for any other reason other than for homework or to borrow his supplies. And if he tried making small talk with these guys? God it’d be the most awkward conversation ever. He’d talk about his life back in some other part of the world and these guys wouldn’t get it, they never could. They weren’t the ones moving houses like it’s vacation, they weren’t the ones who had to cancel their plans just because their parents had a business trip like every weekend, and they sure weren’t people who had to constantly leave all that progress behind and start from scratch for everytime they had to go.

But, there was no point lamenting anymore, especially since not only did he get used to it eventually, he’d also just finished wiping off the last bits of grime on the windows, which means ..he finally gets to go home!

He quickly packs up his bag, picking up all his stationary and notebooks, not even caring to put his papers in his files anymore. His face was now filled with glee, excited at the thought he’ll get to be picked up by his parents when he comes out the building. All he wants to do now is to just go home—

At least, until he’s reminded of the usual misfortune he had this morning.

=========== ===========

There’s something he remembers. As it comes back to him, a voice came from just ahead him.

“Winnie, dear, I’m going to have to pick you up late today, your father’s got an important interview soon, and I’ve got work to do, so just stay at the bus stop and don’t move, okay?”

He remembers how this morning back in the car, just right before he was getting sent off for school this morning, how the blonde lady in professional attire always said that with her ever soothing and calm voice, and how it was never enough to wash the disappointment on his face away as he was being told he’d be picked up late, again.

He whines with a clearly upset tone. “Again? Really? Why can’t you just get someone else to—“

The woman cuts him off, “Darling, we both have important things to attend to beforehand. You understand, right?”

“…hmph.” was all the child could huff out, eyes no longer making contact with his mother’s in the rear mirror.

The mother could only sigh out, replying back with: “Oh, don’t get so pouty over this, it’s just like before, alright? We’ll go out to treat you to something afterwards.”

Winnie could only hide his dull expression he made as he accepted. “..Fine, but we’re getting ice cream just like you said last time, right?

“Sure, but only if you sleep early this time!”

The child sighed but nodded nonetheless. Maybe this time could be different. Maybe something good could happen for once…

Right?

=========== ===========

…looks like he got himself excited over nothing.

The door for the classroom unlocks and locks back up as Winnie walks out. His face practically screams bitterness underneath that bored expression of his. Bending over and tying up his shoe laces, he then proceeds to check if the door was properly locked before walking off towards the exit. The cream yellow-ish colour of the hallway wasn’t exactly the most interesting to look at, but he was mostly trying to distract himself from getting so worked up over something he should’ve gotten used to. Lots of medals, trophies and accomplishments were hung and shown off, sealed behind a wooden shelf with glass for people to peer through and look at. His eyes wandered off those achievements for awhile before he was eventually just right in front of the door.

And so he pushes the handle, and it rattles.

Nothing.

“…eh?” Confused, he pushes the door again, with much more force this time.

Still nothing.

Okay, so… that’s not supposed to happen.

Winnie internally panics with something along the lines of oh god, did someone lock up this already!? am I going to be stuck here forever!? for a moment before noticing the window and how he very much can’t reach it enough to see.

He looked around, searching for anything that could help him take a closer look from inside. Before he could think about whether it’d be okay, he darts for a chair from one of the unlocked classrooms, and grabs it, placing it near the window enough to make sure he can see what was going on out there. And from what he sees, there was a huge pile of snow jamming in front of the door. Looks like he took abit too long cleaning to avoid this… Hell, it looked even harder to open from outside.

The kid grumbled out whatever hope he has left, just hoping that it was just some minor thing. Hoping, desperately hoping so. He wiggles and struggles with the door, pushing and pulling enough for just a smidge of movement. Once again, to no avail.

“…surely I don’t have to go that far, right..?”

The door rattled, growing louder the more he had shaken it. Nothing. At this point, it’s very clear that nothing was gonna work . Which only leaves him with one more option.

He sighs, walking backwards and exhaling whatever sense he has left. “urgh, guess this’ll make do then..!”

The boy in blue was now preparing to karate chop the door off its own hinges! With all the might he has inside of his tiny body, he swings and strikes—

“OW!!”

and immediately cries out from injuring his hand on the now open door..

“W-what the..”

“Whoa, kid. What’s your problem?” The man was slightly concerned, looking towards this child who had just tried to karate chop a door open. Like that totally would’ve worked.

Winnie took a look from behind him and saw the now shovelled snow on the side. Looks like he didn’t need to that after all. How embarrassing.

“N-Nothing…! The door just wasn’t opening..so.. I thought.. uh..” His small voice trails off the more he talks, no matter how people looked at this situation, he really can’t explain this any better could he..!?

“Look, it’s whatever, just get outta here soon, security’s gotta close this up.” The man had a janitor’s uniform on, his face half covered by the shadow casted from his hat, with only his furrowed eyes being the only sign the kid could read out.

“Right, sorry…! I’ll uh— get going.”

Followed by a nod from the man leaving the scene, the child could only sigh miserably once he was out of hearing range. Dragging the palms of his hand from his face, he could only walk out the door for a minute before shivering at the sense of the cold, freezing breeze.

His hands clutched onto his upper arms, hoping it’d make him stop shaking so badly. It does not work, and looks like things might not go so smoothly after all.

Just like always, it seems.

=========== ===========

If the inside of the school wasn’t already that cold, then he sure felt it once he stepped outside.

The snow rained down around the area, and it’s a lot more than yesterday for sure. He’d hoped that it wouldn’t be this bad but life had chosen to prove him wrong. It always had and always will. As such, it became routine for him to quickly button up his favourite blue cardigan and scurry off out the building.

Walking across the entirely snow-covered ground, he could only imagine how long he’d have to wait until he really gets back home. He can’t help but get sick of it, really. How often did he have to wait until sunset just for them to come back? The fact he couldn’t go around anywhere in the meantime sucked too. His parents couldn’t trust him with a pair of scissors for goodness’s sake, he’s had to deal with those kiddie ones for ages! It hurt badly when his classmates made fun of him for those small things, whether it’d be from his choice in attire or maybe how he was incredibly picky with food and hated cafeteria meals.

But what could he do, really? It’s not like he was gonna start eating something slop from the school just because the rest of his classmates did. That’s too much work, really. I mean… he wouldn’t, but…

If it helped make him feel more normal…

helped him feel like he belonged…

then—!!

A hitched breath of air that cut itself off quickly could be heard.

…

Winnie stops in his tracks in response.

=========== ===========

The sounds of sniffling and hitched breaths that were barely going in a rhythm at all were audible to him. The noises would be loud, pleading for someone to hear them, then suddenly die down into what could be close to silence. Strange, he was usually the only one at this bus stop. Maybe someone else is also going home late? I mean, it could happen, but when you’ve been going to the same place for awhile, you tend to pick up a pattern. And that pattern definitely didn’t include… whatever this was.

Wondering who this mysterious person could be, he slowly walked close to the sides of the bus stop, making very little sound as he peeked his head just enough to get a glimpse.

There, he saw him. A small brunette boy sitting on those benches, with his hands gripping onto his jacket’s sleeves so hard he might as well just rip them off his arms. And his knees hiding that tear-ridden face of his, but not enough to fully cover his teary eyes darting towards the ground as he mutters things that were quiet enough for anybody to assume the wind, watering up the longer he kept them open. The child seems… distressed, his furrowed eyebrows say so anyway.

Winnie couldn’t help but be troubled by how upset he looked, even just standing from a distance he could tell how much his face yelled out frustration. He’d know that look from anywhere, simply from experience. There’s not much he could do, but one thing’s for sure, he should definitely check up on him.

Unfortunately, Winnie isn’t the most subtle kid around here, as a voice just from the same direction he’s heading towards spoke, a voice drenched in much misery.

“Hey, you know don’t have to keep staring at me like that, right?”

Looks like he’d been spotted, way to go there.

Seems like he’d been standing near that spot for awhile, and apparently it was long enough for the brunette to have noticed him. Something tells him that he wasn’t that quiet when he tried to get closer either. But whatever the reason could be for his poor stealth skills, it’s not gonna save him from this predicament.

“Oh, I-.. I’m sorry, I didn’t realise—“ The blonde would’ve tried explaining himself but…

“There’s no point in doing that. Just— just don’t talk to me.”He seems to be insistent about making himself clear with how fast he cuts off his words.

“…you could’ve at least let me explain myself.”

“What’s there to explain? You clearly see me sobbing over here and you think you’re gonna just make me feel better with a little pat on my back and some words, don’t you?” The boy scowled, now visibly angry as he turned to look at Winnie, face to face.

..He would’ve said something to oppose to that but… he’d be lying if he said that wasn’t one of the reasons he approached him.

The silence was all the brunette needed to hear though. “…Knew it. You people are all the same, can’t even be honest over something like this…!”

Winnie opens his mouth to interject but upon seeing his reaction, he decides otherwise.

His face was more hurt then ever, the way his eyes grew more watery and his very poor attempt in hiding that fact made it much more evident. It’s clear that there’s definitely something going on. Winnie wants to help him but getting through this way, talking to him like this… can’t be the way to get through that wall. There has to be a different approach to this, he thinks. It might take awhile, and maybe none of this would’ve been worth trying at all for, but..

for once in his life, he’s glad he’s got enough time to try.

Now he’s just got to be worried about whether or not this would be a good idea in the first place…!

So he decides to just sit on the benches, knowing it’s gonna take a long while to get back home, he might as well. He keeps a safe distance from the other boy, not too close to invade the definition of personal space, but not too far to make it seem like he wasn’t interested at the very least. The brunette noticed and decided to quickly shut down whatever questions Winnie’s got in his head.

“…What more do you want? Because if it’s about why I’m crying, tough luck.” His words had a flare of fury in them, a lot more than what usually came from a child of his size.

…uh, on second thought, might be a lot better to not mention that in front of him. So he tries starting a different topic.

“Well, I’m just… waiting here for my parents, nothing much honestly. It’s just like how it’s always been.” His eyes looking towards the road, or …at least where the road was visible before, since it was entirely covered with more snow then back at the school. Nonetheless, that’s definitely not the point.

He turns to face the kid beside him, who was now making eye contact with. “But… I don’t think I recall ever seeing you here before.”

An immediate shrill tone could be heard as he spoke. “W-Why’s that any of your business?? So what if I don’t use this bus stop often?”

“I’m just saying… not many go here just to storm off like that.”

[evelynndecipio-blog]

Decipio,

Apologies for the delay with the reply. I wanted to get some more information from my Ravenclaw contacts before writing so I actually had some decent stuff to talk about. Sorry about that.

Personally, I do not have anything against the Liberation Club. We probably should've done more research but to be fair, it was just gossip. No one actually knows anything that's going on as far as I can tell which is why it's just rumors or gossip. This is why we need people like you, Decipio. And speaking of me and Riddle's conversation, I've got to admit, I don't remember much of it. It was so long ago and honestly not that important to me. But I guess I could ask her if you want me to double check. I don't know if she remembers much either, though.

I have my POV of the common room incident and I took some notes down but I think I'll need to talk to more people. But so far Henry and Oliveire seem to have their facts down solid. There seemed to be something that attacked all the kids who fell through to the basement and someone definitely saw someone lurking outside the common room. I talked to one of the kids who saw it, Maria Dee, and she seems sane enough to know what she's talking about. I wonder who that could be? Could it be one of those hags the professors were talking about that night? I've never seen a hag, except for this one really mean 5th year.... but that's not the point is it? I trust my own eyes and my housemates'es stories, but if you want me to ask around some more I can definitely do that.

The fact that Lear's been missing scares me slightly but he is a smart man. Heel be fine. Its' very suspishos that he has been gone for so long but I can only assume that he is alright. He must have a very good reason for leaving us so suddenly but that reason is definitely not the same reason that the professors said was his reason. When he comes back? I am MARCHING ON OVER TO HIM after he gets comfortably settled in and says hi to all his friends again to get some answers. The students deserve to know! Maybe he was gone to get rid of all the hags for us. I bet Lear would do that for us.

Man if you don't know what something means there's probably no way that I'll know what it means (unless it's a No-Maj term). I kind of feel bad for all the dhampirs if I'm honest. I bet that a lot of people treat them unfairly but I think that dhampirs are pretty okay for the most part. And I definitely feel like people would hang around to see them unless there's a secret passage from Equinox's office that we don't know about. I didn't go to the Masquerade Ball but I think there is been a lot of weird stuff happening with Ilvermorny students and their teachers? But I could be wrong.

I don't think that any of the professors would ever betray us to the hags though. I think that they think that if they panic then wheel panic and I think that what they're thinking is right. But I trust the professors to take care of us so I don't think there's anything wrong with what they're saying. Besides I think that most of the school hates rules in general so with more rules piled on the ones already in place their bound to get antsy and try to rebel. A small and shelfish part of me hopes they do just because there will be lots of fun articles to write about it but then again that's very shelfish. And secretly I would be really sad if we got sent home! I like Hogwarts. I really do.

The marks are crazy, aren't they? Maybe I can interview one of them who has a mark... but I hope they don't start questioning why I'm asking about they're tattoo. It would make a great article though won't you agree?

I am afraid that I have to disagree with you about breeds. One of my dearest friends is part giant and he wouldn't even hurt a fly! Unless the fly took his food or hurt one of his friends but then the fly would definitely deserve it. But most students who may be a part breed are usually harmless I swear!

Alright then. On to the main course. I talked to some of my contacts in Ravenclaw and I heard stories about some weird shit man. She claims that she didn't see much but she did mention dolls that looked like that students. Like voodoo dolls from New Orleans! She said that there were a whole bunch of them in the Forbidden Forest, all of them looking like one of the Ravenclaws in the group. She said it was real creepy. What the hell could those be? I mean a doll of me would be super hot and super cute but still kind of creepy. Espeshully the way she described it. I don't think I would want one of those dolls.

But yeah that's what I've learned so far. I don't know where to turn to next. There's just too much to try and piece together; it's like a gajillion-piece puzzle, and we don't have the picture! Let me know what you think we should do next.

XO's Ami

(( In a different hand: ))

June 26, 2020