#I promise I do have actual human husbandos

[dirtyoldmanhole]

continuing the 'gunter is a obfuscating snake of a sleezeball in the married conquest route and i'm kinda into it' thought: one line that bothered me for a while was in his JP S-support; it's basically his confession line:

Gunther: A promise is a promise. Please answer the question. Kamui: Y-yeah, all right… I don’t have anyone like that… Gunther: I see. Then, what about someone like me? Kamui: W-what? Gunther: You are the only woman that I have loved.

[record scratch] here's the fun thing:

that is a straight up lie.

what about your dead wife gunter? the one you spent twenty-thirty years plotting revenge for and was the literal reason you got possessed by? (kronk voice) that wife? :P

there's a few plausible reasonings for this discrepancy: one, it's not the character, somebody at nintendo straight up didn't play revelation. fates was rushed, it's entirely possible that some S-supports were not double-checked for facts when iirc the routes were being done by separate teams. (1b: technically you could argue 'maybe he didn't actually love her lol' which is darkly hysterical, but that feels so wildly out of character to the whole 'plotting revenge for 20 years' shtick that i'm tossing that out). and then two: nintendo itself fully intended gunter to be lying to corrin.

and i think it's that second reasoning.

which is interesting b/c nintendo almost always falls on the line of warping characters to be lovestruck waifus/husbandos that worship you/corrin even if it starts to bend/break their characterization. why keep his sharp, murky edges of all characters? I genuinely don't think i've ever seen nintendo go as far as have a character baldly lie to you the player so boldly especially when it comes to the main love confession---nintendo doesn't really mix the 'cold blooded emotional manipulation' with the waifuism.

now ... I do think he genuinely loves corrin [gestures @ my whole revelation loveblog]. different topic, that, but both can co-exist, since i think gunter doubling down on the 'you're the only one :)' shtick is him being so petrified at how many questions will be asked about his past, especially in conquest.

don't forget in conquest, corrin (thinks) and is truly considered to be garon's daughter.

you know. the dude that killed his wife he swore revenge on.

awkward, my dude, to fall in love with garon's daughter, lul.

and yet - gunter's trying to balance 'we genuinely love each other, let's start with a clean slate' with 'she's gonna start asking shit i don't want to get into if i do try to be honest ... nope nope nope not gonna go there'. he's a bit of a coward there, but in some ways i can't blame him. there's a lot of hints that point to him being painfully lonely as a closet widow, and the idea of ruining this tender new love with a lot of painful shit in his past is a risk he just kinda... sidesteps.... and keeps sidestepping........... until it's just too awful to even bring up to begin with.

it's a very human flaw.

but even still on the other hand, i think it says a lot of darkly nuanced things that he has no qualms not even just not telling corrin shit, his spouse in conquest, but actively lying to her about his past and doubling down on that secret.

honestly in another metatextual level, it's kind of fridge brilliance for setting up how, mmmm long-term emotionally manipulative he can be, that's only really shown in revelation ('i've been using you all along'). you also see glimmers of it with corrin's A-support with silas with the literal gaslighting corrin to forget about silas; so this isn't a one-off moment.

gunter is a fucking fantastic snake of an actor.

and lastly on another level, ultimately i think that line is actually one of those that explains some people's terrible reading comprehension of gunter. don't forget that Fate's EN fan-translation scene that first year was huge, far bigger than any other FE game, and so a lot of fandoms/people's opinions were shaped by osmosis from the JP script versus the EN script. I could totally see people taking that implication he's never been married at face value and genuinely being confused as to his actual backstory if they've never played revelation. basically everything about his character is all misdirections right down to playing players like a fiddle with his assumed archetype (jeigan, wholesome dad), and the abyss between what he says and what he is.

tl;dr more sleazeball midlife crisis jeigans plz 🙏

[astaroth1357]

Demigod MC Series: Hestia

This is another eternally virgin goddess, so we're doing another pseudo-demigod by adoption (like we did with Athena).

Demigod MC: Intro, Aphrodite, Hermes, Hades, Dionysus, Demeter, Athena, Hades Pt. 2, Poseidon, Ares, Hestia

Hestia is the goddess of the Hearth, Home, Architecture, Domesticity, Family, and the State. She's high up there (firstborn of Rhea and Cronus), but several factors have led to her falling into the background when compared to the other (flashier) Olympians. She swore to never marry, rejecting proposals from both Poseidon and Apollo, and is something of an antithesis to Aphrodite.

Lucifer

Honestly? He thought they were exactly what they were after. A weak human with no experience in the magical world what-so-ever.

Well… He was half-right.

On the surface, this is a pretty weak human. They don't have super flashy powers or a divine birth from the gods… but they do have a very protective adoptive mother.

The brothers had just settled in for their first dinner with the new human when the goddess herself strolled into their dining room, asked who was in charge, then dragged Lucifer away by the ear!

She's not even his mother, yet he felt the intense urge to apologize and put himself in his own room… Oh, the humiliation… at least she did the same to Diavolo…

The Prince was only able to calm her down by promising absolutely NO harm would come to her child… on their heads...

By the time the goddess finally let him go, Lucifer was about ready to shackle the MC to his wrist so nothing could touch them but he settled on keeping them with him like an assistant of sorts. They were in charge of helping him with the paperwork so he could keep an eye on them. 

What he didn’t expect was for them to be so… good at it? They could keep his offices clean, they managed his daily schedule, fixed up the House, and still have time to bring him tea and sweets every night!

They could even reign in his brothers somehow… They weren't strong or intimidating, but one or two mildly unhappy words out of them and everybody would be on their best behavior.

Was everyone positive they're only human...?

As much as he hated to admit, he may have a slight deep case of falling for the housekeeper… He would make a move, but well…

He has Beel to contend with first.

Mammon

Okay so, watching Lucifer get dragged out by the ear just like Raphael used to do to him was hilarious!!! The whole room got a good laugh! 🤣

Until Hestia glared at them and suddenly they all felt like they'd disappointed someone important….

And all that fuss over some dumb human??

So what if they made amazing food?

So what if they could clean the entire mansion in a day?

So what if they were the walking equivalent to a warm cup of cocoa on a winter's day??

So what if they were just the kindest, sweetest thing in this godforsaken hellscape and he would throw himself in front of a bus to keep them safe-

-Wait, when did that happen?!?

Seriously, Mammon's attachment to the MC came out of NOWHERE to him. One day, he was threatening to eat their soul and the next he's freaking out when they stub their toe!

He swears they have to have some kind of magic about them! A charm, or a spell, or… their lovable smile and warm, loving hugs...! 😊

Damnit!! They're too cute!! He needs them to go away but also never leave, thanks. 😒

In all seriousness, though their kind nature puts Mammon's tsundere self at a bit of a disadvantage, his protective instincts shoot through the roof whenever they're involved.

Naturally, that means his day is spent running them away from hungry lesser demons or shielding them from Beel and Lucifer's tug-of-war matches… He's a busy guy these days. 😖

Leviathan 

They're so… so… MOE!!!

That was his immediate thought when Mammon brought them home. He was expecting a defenseless human, but not one that could have stepped out of one of his slice-of-life manga!

To be honest, his instant thought was try and find a place to sit them on his shelves with the rest of the adorable characters he loves… 😅

And that was before they even opened their mouth! Five words into their introduction and he was ready to get their face on a t-shirt!!

Honestly, combine their natural cuteness with their household skills and they made for perfect waifu/husbando material… 

Not helped by the fact they found one of his maid/butler outfits while doing the laundry one day. Not only did they ask if they could wear it, they actually non-ironically liked it and started wearing it around the House!!

Oh he got cornered by Beel, Lucifer, and Mammon separately that day because they thought he was using them for fetish fuel… But it was their idea, he swears!!

I mean… He didn't discourage them or anything either but still…

If Beel hadn't claimed them on Day One, Levi might have eventually thrown his hat in the ring too... Oh well… he can pine from a distance… What else is new? 😔

Satan

He has a video of Hestia dragging Lucifer out of the dining room on his phone and it's one of his most treasured possessions now. 😌

He is perhaps the only person in the House who was not at all impressed with their little human.

So they could cook? So could he. So they can clean? That's not impressive. They could manage a household? Big deal, he's more or less been in charge of the same thing for centuries!

As far as he saw it, there was nothing the MC could do that he couldn't do as proficiently or even better. There was nothing remarkable about this human at all!

… except for one thing.

That maid/butler outfit of Levi's? The one they like to wear around?

It has cat accessories…

Either they don't notice or they don't mind it but they essentially walk around the House cleaning things with little kitty ears attached to their head and a bell on their collar…

Dammit… Why did Levi even buy that?!?

Satan ended up getting in trouble for enchanting their outfit to give them REAL ears and a tail "accidentally..." Lucifer strung him up by his toes, Beel gave him a black-eye, and Mammon still calls him a "perverted cat freak" but it was worth it, he says, worth it!!

Asmodeus 

Oh Beel…

Asmo saw Beel's feelings for the MC coming from a mile away. He didn't even need to confirm it with a sniff check, he had them scented by the end of their first night!

Lucifer, on the other hand, now that was a surprise... 😏

Ask him a century ago if Lucifer would ever consider a human lover, godly mother or no, and he'd have laughed! Yet here he is, giving gifts and sneaking whiffs of their adorable new housemate!

Of course, that's causing some commotion because they're pitted against each other, but Asmo finds it kind of cute honestly. 

Beel and Lucifer aren't fighting, not for real. The whole house knows Lucifer would win in a real brawl, but neither of them actually want to hurt the other… They're far too close for that.

So Beel tosses Lucifer around with kid gloves and Lucifer holds back considerably against Beel. It's pretty much just two brothers who love each other squabbling over the same toy… 🤭

Honestly, Lucifer might have bowed out by now and just let Beel have them but now his pride's on the line… thus an endless tussle between family and the sweet MC is in the middle, clueless to it all!

Tragic, is it not? But it certainly makes things more entertaining around here! (Good thing too since Beel beat him to the punch… If it's a fight against those two, he'll have to keep any of his own affairs with the MC under the radar... 😏)

Beelzebub 

He has claimed this one. Full stop.

For a bit of perspective: when Barbatos needs cooking tips, he calls Hestia. Hestia, the Divine Master of All Things Cooking. Hestia, the goddess who raised this MC… 

Needless to say if they have any magic at all, it's in the kitchen.

If food is the way to Beel's heart, this MC has claimed his heart, soul, and probably all of his vital organs. Their food is astounding!! Always perfect every time and so good it brings him to tears!

It started the night of that first dinner, prepared by MC. He was too busy scarfing down the table to even notice a goddess showed up and then he proposed to the MC with their own pig roast by meal's end!

They said no to marriage, but an instant pact agreement suited him just fine.

Beel didn't waste a single moment before he started treating them like a potential mate, territorial aggression and all, but there was a bit of a catch… He kept the MC totally oblivious to it.

Surprisingly, Beel's can turn the "They're MINE" part of his brain on and off pretty well. He's nothing but sweet and cuddly to the MC when they're around and even with his brothers!... as long as they don't try anything.

The moment he caught whiff that Lucifer might be pursuing them too, it was on. Suddenly the two brothers who almost never fight were in competition against each other! But of course, both have an unspoken rule to never do so in front of MC.

And now poor MC believes it's common for demons to "play wrestle" like puppies and hugs are traditionally supposed to be so hard they could snap spines… 

And it doesn’t look like they'll be backing down any time soon… Oh dear...

Belphegor 

You know what? For once, everything goes exactly to plan for Belphie!

No really, this MC has no hidden powers, no magic horses, not even Demon Nip. They are a helpless, trusting little human who just wants to help their big teddy bear get his twin back!

So, you know how it goes. The charm, the lies, the treachery and all of that. He even gets to kill them!! Oh, happy days!! 😁

Come to think of it, they did smell an awful lot like Beel… But who cares, as long as Lucifer suffers right?? And this whole "living together in harmony" crap fails, right?!

Wrong. 

Beel went ballistic. Lucifer did too, but Beel was what really hurt…

Belphie can safely say that in all of his life, Beel has never physically attacked him. Not once, or at least, not with intent to kill… 

But when the sixthborn's fist went crashing through the wall right by his ear that day, he knew his brother's first instinct was to aim for his head… and his second was to miss, as he still loved him, but only by just a little.

What the hell did he just do??

Thank their father for Barbatos and all the funky time stuff he can do because bringing the MC "back" snapped his angry brothers right out of it. 

Things should have been smoothed over at that point but as everyone was finally settling down for tea, Hestia made another appearance in the House… this time carrying a butcher's knife!

Time fix or no, Diavolo had promised her no harm would come to MC and at least one continuity of them DIED… so punishment was now on Lucifer and the Demon Prince himself!

Belphie, in a rare case of guilt and an expression of brotherly love, offered to take their place since it WAS kind of all his fault. His gesture softened the Goddess of Family juuust enough to lighten his sentence from execution to hard labor.

And thus, the MC had their own housekeeping assistant for a whole year, complete with bitter reluctance and a matching maid outfit! Cat-theme and all!!

He's sending nightmares to anybody who laughs… guaranteed. 😒

[beels-burger-babe]

A Little Voice Told Me - Pt.2

Poly! MC Summary: Words hurt and leave their scars. MC learns this the hard way after hearing some not-so-nice whispers about them while on a date with Beel. How are they supposed to be the partner of the seven lords of the Devildom when they just don't measure up? Part 1: HERE, Part 3: HERE ***Good Golly!! Y'all really like the angst, huh? Here you guys go. Cry your hearts out and enjoy! - B*** Beelzebub woke up the rest of his brothers early the next morning. While most of them attempted to flip him off or threaten him at the initial disturbance, all it took was him saying that they needed to talk about you for them to shoot out of bed. In a matter of minutes, all of them, except Levi, were seated around the breakfast table. "If we're talking about MC, why aren't they here?" Satan asked while poking at a piece of fruit. "I don't know about you, but I personally don't feel right talking about them behind their back." Belphie scoffed and laid his head in his arms. "It's not like we're gossiping about them or anything. They were acting off last night, and Beel thought we should discuss what we're gonna do about it." Beel nodded, "They pulled into themself halfway through the night, and was upset but kept brushing me off whenever I tried to talk to them about it." Mammon huffed and crossed his arms. "Maybe they just didn't feel like they could talk to ya about it," he rose to his feet and began to walk towards the door. "I'm the first! I'm sure I can get it out of them, easy peasy! I'll just head in there and-" "Mammon, sit down!" Lucifer hissed. Mammon grumbled under his breath but did as told. Lucifer sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "We've talked about this. Stop bringing up the whole 'first man' thing. MC is in a relationship with all of us. Not just you." The second-born pouted and stabbed an egg with his fork.

Lucifer rolled his eyes at his brother's antics and looked back at Beel. "Something clearly happened during the date. Do you have any ideas at all at what it could've been?" Asmodeus stirred a swirly straw around in his drink. "I mean, I would be pretty upset if I spent three hours of my evening at a barbaric sporting event too," Asmo chuckled and smirked. "The only good thing about sports is that you get to see all those rippling muscles of the athletes in action." Beel scowled at his brother took a bite out of the omelet that was on his plate. "It wasn't because of the game. MC loves coming to my Fangol games and was having a blast with me until halftime. Something had to have happened while I was gone." Asmodeus opened his mouth to counter the statement when Leviathan came rushing into the room carrying his laptop. Lucifer raised an eyebrow at the sight, "What have I told you about devices at the table?" Leviathan shot him an annoyed look as he plopped down in one of the chairs. "This isn't about table etiquette. This is about MC," he looked over at Beel and Belphie. "I think I have an idea on what may have caused them to start distancing themselves." Everyone perked up in interest at the news; each one of them eager to know what was distressing their loved one so much that they felt like they couldn't talk to them. "Well are you going to tell us, or are you just going to sit there?" Satan quipped, his anger beginning to get the better of him as he sat on the edge of his seat. Levi gave him a flat look before he typed a few things on his keyboard. "I was doing a raid last night trying to keep my mind off of what might've happened with MC and decided to ask my party members about it," Leviathan's expression darkened as he began to explain. It was clear to everyone that whatever was said, wasn't taken lightly by the otaku. Rather than reading the conversation out loud, he turned his laptop screen for all his brothers to see. Leviachan: Gaaah! I just can't focus on the game tonight. My partner came back from a date tonight and has been acting kind of sus. There's definitely something bothering them, but they refuse to tell anyone. Ruri-Chans-Husbando: Dude, you're talking about that stupid human right? Why are you even with them? You shouldn't give a Normie like them the time of day. Waifu-Addict: Exactly! Listen, we've all been talking and you need to drop that whore. They're totally just using you and your brothers for your titles and power. The demons read in horror and rage as the chat room filled with messages from the members of Leviathan's party all saying similar garbage about you and degrading you in every way they could think of. Satan stood up and began to pace near the table as he used every inch of his self-control to keep himself from lashing out. "I want names, Levi. Who are they and why do they seem to think it's okay to talk about MC like- like that?!" Satan snarled as he curled his hands into fists. Levi tsked and crossed his arms, as Lucifer took the laptop to look more closely at the messages. "You say that as if I haven't already used my 'title and power' as Grand Admiral to have my men collect and imprison them. They're at the navy base waiting for us to get our hands on them as soon as we sort this whole mess out." Belphie growled, now sitting up and wide awake. "Get our hands on them is right. No one gets away with this shit," Asmodeus glared at the computer as though it had just dyed all of his clothing brown. "Rotten brats. They're all just jealous of stunning MC. Ugh, Diavolo, haters are the worst." Beel pushed his plate away from himself as he frowned deeply. "As disgusting and horrible as this is, what does it have to do with MC getting all quiet during our date?" A low rumble came from Lucifer as he handed the laptop back to Levi. A fiery hatred was burning brightly in his eyes as he gritted his teeth. "If a bunch of anti-social shut-ins are going around talking about our dearest MC like this, I believe Leviathan's point is that others probably are."

"Ouch. I wasn't going to say it l-like that, but yes," Levi winced and continued, "MC probably overheard people saying something about them. I mean, if people said that crap about me I'd probably hide in my room and not come out for months!" Mammon, who had been surprisingly quiet during all of this, had a very serious expression on his face. "Right, and we don't want MC to go through that. For Diavolo's sake, they've left alone to overthink this enough," Mammon stood up and headed towards the door again, Satan hot on his trail. "I'm going up to there to talk with them. Ya'll are welcome to come with, but you ain't stoppin' me." "Actually, Mammon, you're not. We should wait until MC comes to us," Lucifer interrupted. An animalistic snarl tore its way from Satan's throat as what little self-control he had snapped. Wrath incarnate lunged himself at Lucifer, grabbing his older brother by the collar of his cloak. "Are you serious, Lucifer?! You're seriously putting your stupid pride first, now?!? MC needs us!" Lucifer growled and pushed Satan off of him as he stood to size him up. "No. What they need is to not feel pressured to open up when they aren't ready! We can't make them feel like they can't come to us!" Mammon scoffed from where he stood in the back. "Oh, cause that's perfect logic! News flash, oh wise one, They ain't gonna come to us if they're thinkin' they're a burden! But you wouldn't know anything about that would you?!" Lucifer's eyes widen and he took a step back in shock at the statement. "What is that supposed to mean?" Mammon and Satan both opened their mouths to put Lucifer in his place when Beel all of sudden cleared his throat loudly. All three of the angry demons turned to snap at him but froze as they saw you standing in the room behind them. They instantly straightened themselves up gave you their full attention. The air seemed to lay still between you as everyone waited for the other to make the first move. As with almost every situation, it was Mammon who broke the silence. He took a step towards you. "MC, I was just coming to get you actually. There's somethin' we all wanna talk to you about." They could hear your breath catch in your throat as you took a step back. Panic filled your eyes the moment the words left his mouth. "O-Oh. I, um, I was actually just going to grab an apple and then head off to RAD for class. M-Maybe we can talk afterwards?" Satan frowned as you walked past him towards the fruit bowl. "MC, it's the weekend." You stopped mid-step. An uncomfortable tension filled the room as the obvious excuse was exposed. The brothers waited for you to move, to speak, to do something to give them any sort of sign for what you wanted them to do, but you just stood there, still like a statue except for the tremors in your hand. "Come on, Darling," Asmodeus spoke softly. His face clearly showed the hurt and concern that was coursing through him. "Everything's alright, I promise. We just need to talk about a few things." The brothers had thought of a number of ways you could've reacted to them confronting you. Lucifer thought that perhaps you would snap at them and distance yourself further. Mammon, Levi, and Asmo expected a few small tears followed by a cuddle session. Satan imagined a slightly more dramatic telling, like something from one of his novels, that ended him being your hero and massacring all those who dared speak ill about you. Beel thought perhaps you could talk over a bunch of comfort foods that allowed you to remain calm and feel safe. Belphie had hoped that perhaps you hadn't believed what you overheard, and the two of you could laugh at how idiotic even the idea of them not loving you was. But you, breaking down into tears, sobbing the words "I'm sorry" over and over again? None of them had expected, nor were prepared, for that. ***Apparently this is now going to be a three-part series. This part was interesting to write. I fully believe that if the brothers were in a poly relationship with the MC they would definitely bicker and argue about

who knows MC best and who had the better date whenever MC isn't around. Honestly, they probably have a score chart 😅 I hope you guys liked part 2! Keep an eye out for part 3, where MC finally opens up to the boys and we have some hurt/comfort times \uwu/ ***

[melting-tofu]

Um hello there! this is my first time asking for a request so im sorry in advance if I did anything wrong :') may I as for a head cannon whereby kaeya /xiao /diluc /zhongli / childe (just one of them is fine too) 's s/o has a difficult pregnancy and baby arrival? ** is up to you whether it ends fluffy or angst - I'm sorry if it sounds abit weird and isok's if you don't do it :'/ Hope you have a nice day though and can't wait to read more =w=

Oh I- I panicked a lot while writing this- Sorry for making you wait for so long! And for not including Zhongli :(, I don't really get how I should properly put this together tbh I have never written something like this before, so this is not very close to the request, and I can't go into details the baby arrival part ;_;

Note: Female reader.... that's it, unless pregnancy topic could be triggering.

-> Navigation

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Childe:

。He's so excited he can't even decide the one who will be more childish is him or his child.

。Claims that he knows so so so well about taking care of children because he has lots of siblings.

。Will not dispute further if you say a child is different from a sibling.

。Oh he's a harbinger, he has so much work to do :( He puts high hope on his family that they can be there for you and often send letters home.

。If the letters return to him saying you're not well he goes total panicked he doesn't know how to put it to words into the new one he's writing, even when he can, he wonders how long will it take to reach you...

。When he's home, he can spend hours for you and the unborn baby.

。Words can't describe how affectionate he is ;_;

"Oh, oh! Did you feel that? Like something just brushed up my hand? Or someone... is it the little one?"

。Really cries when he arrives just in time to see his child, he's just so happy and sometimes wishes he is not a part of the fatui to have as much time with his new family as he can.

Diluc:

。This man, his usual annoyed face that you sometimes dislike suddenly doesn't exist anymore.

。Like, he always puts on a soft look now.

。It's clear to tell when he's worried, when he panics, all for you <3

。Very protective, all you need to do is rest, he will do the other things and keep his eyes on you, and when he's not present then his maids will.

。Why does he seem so professional when he handles things smh as if he had a wife before, actually it's just because he reads lots of books-

。Seriously just when he gently holds, caresses and kisses are enough to soothe your pain away..

。One of your daily activities will be him humming a soft tune while hugging you from the back, his hands wander around your belly.

"Don't give me that look. Oh? You have never heard me singing before? Then all you need to do is ask... Hmmm now I'm doing this because I think.. the baby will love it."

。When he gets to see his child for the first time, he tries not to break into tears you can tell how happy he is.

Kaeya:

。The chad husbando and father.

。You have no idea how long he had been preparing for this- he already came up with some names for your child... what.

。He isn't strictly protective tho, he allows you to have some 'freedom' but don't let him spot you doing something that involves moving too much.

。He may be more busy than Diluc and he doesn't have maids :( so he possibly asks for countless days off to take care of you, and oh the Acting Grand Master takes pity on him-

。Don't worry of being lonely during your difficult time, he will even give too much affections than needed.

。At night he likes to hold you in bed while musing or childishly ranting about Diluc to the baby who isn't even born yet.

"When you grow up, if you want to become a knight then it's best that you don't become a Cavalry Captain like me... because there aren't any horses in Mondstadt, and you won't be able to spend much time with your mother due to how much work you will have... even without horses."

。For the first time in your entire life you see his soft as ever gaze when his eyes first land on his child, he abandons all the names he ever thought of before (unless you like them) and quickly thinks of a new one.

Xiao:

。Are you being serious to the Vigilant Yaksha that you're pregnant with him??

。So you know Xiao's true form? Yea, your child is really going to be half illuminated beast half human.

。Please- he is so scared of his karma and what it can do to you and the baby :'(

。He doesn't want to keep a distance either... he doesn't want to be unaffectionate and if he's not there to protect you all then who is?

。Overprotective is the right word to describe how he can be, he has to/he must make sure you're safe, tho he isn't sure what to do at first, but he is determined to learn: make sure you have well eaten, you have enough rest, ect. omg why are mortals so complicated.

。As long as you're in his eye sight then all you have to do is nothing, just tell him and he literally does everything, and no he is not letting you do it.

。His favorite things to do include him holding you in bed, it's either you nuzzle up his chest or he does it with your body, he just wants to be this close.

"Once you wake up tomorrow you can look at me as much as you want, now stop staring and close your eyes, sleep, if you don't then the baby is not going to rest either..."

。Xiao is rendered a sobbing mess when the child arrives, he just really loves this family and promises to protect and to keep you all happy.

[koukouture]

A construct’s finale

When your beloved construct gets corrupted by the punishing virus, you aren’t quite sure who’s supposed to make it out alive

Note: God has allowed me to exist for another day and I am going to make it everyone's problem. Also I did one of these for Chrome here 

Characters: Kamui, Lee, and Watanabe (will do more eventually when I actually have ideas for them lol) 

Warnings: Gore, death, angst, have fun lmao

Tagging: @husbando-collector-sanctuary because I said I’d do this. Watch your babies suffer

Kamui

You should have known something was wrong when Kamui was too quiet while you two were scouting an empty building. He didn’t chat with you like he usually did, he only held your hand and looked around. 

It shouldn’t have taken this long for you to realize that Kamui has been corrupted. Because now he has you in a choke hold while tears stream down his face and his eyes flicker between red and his usual purple. 

“K-kamui” you choke, reaching for him. 

Your hand comes in contact with his cheek and he suddenly drops you. He stumbles back, screaming in pain, no doubt from the Punishing virus. 

“Don’t come any closer” he commands, moving further away from you. You don’t care or you tuned him out because you step closer. “I said don’t!” he yells before coughing. 

“Why didn’t you say anything?” you ask, inching closer. 

“I wanted to be with you, commandant. B-but I hurt you. I’m supposed to protect you but I-” 

“Hey, hey. It’ll be ok. I’m fine” you reach for him again, but he flinches and backs away. 

“Commandant, don’t- please don’t” he says quietly. 

You stop, clenching your fists while the blonde cries and fishes a small knife from inside his jacket. You don’t have time to react before he plunges is into his chest. 

“Kamui!” you shout, running towards him, he doesn’t back away this time as you try to stop him. He only takes a deep breath and jams it into his chest, screaming as he pries the metal open. 

“C-commandant, remember when on my birthday you said you’d grant me a wish, but I never ended up asking you for anything?” 

He coughed again before looking into your eyes “I want to ask you for one last thing, commandant” 

Kamui holds you hand, it would have been sweet but he gently puts the knife in your hand, closing your fist around it. His vitals fluids coat your hands, but you can’t bring yourself to do anything about it as you shake uncontrollably. 

“I’m sorry. But I’m not strong enough to do it by myself” 

“No!” you shout “I’m not doing this, Kamui. Please I’ll let you go, I won’t say anything about it, just don’t do this” 

He gives you a warm smile before he reaches up and strokes your face “It’s gonna be ok, commandant. You have Lee and the others, you won’t be alone” 

“There has to be another way” 

The construct levels your shaky hands with his core smiling at you “I don’t want to hurt anyone else, so please do this for me, commandant” 

“You won’t. I know you won’t Kamui” you sob “Please Kamui, I love you” 

Kamui seems shocked for a moment before smiling “I love you too, commandant” 

You’re shaking hard as he guides you hand closer to his pulsing core. 

“It’ll be ok” 

You close your eyes and take a shaky breath, and when you open them his core is dim. His eyes are closed and a smile rests on his lips. 

The knife clatters to the floor as you hold your face in your hands, crying your heart out until the rest of Gray Raven finds you... and Kamui’s lifeless frame. 

Watanabe

This was inevitable, the old construct thinks. He removed his inver device and left with only a weak filter on his frame. Watanabe should have known that sooner or later he would get corrupted. He would have accepted it if it were to come for that, he would have accepted it a year ago. But now you’re here, and now you’re watching him loose himself. 

“Stand back, commandant” he growls, clutching his chest. He doesn’t have a heart, he is no human, but he can feel the Punishing virus spread through his systems, racing to his core. It hurts, it feels like having lava replace his vital fluids. But he can’t give into it. Not when you’re here. 

You don’t listen. You never listen to him. Sometimes he finds it funny and even cute, most times it irritates him. This time, you’re putting your life in danger, so he can say he’s fairly pissed. 

You’re both standing in some old ruins, Watanabe’s already cleared it of corrupted and figured that maybe since you two were alone he’d tell you how he’s been feeling lately. Why he’s been avoided you for a while now. But alas, it turns out he’s been corrupted. 

“I said to stay back! Listen to me for once in your damn life” 

“You don’t get to talk to me like that, soldier” you say sharply, but he can hear your voice tremble ever so slightly as you step closer until you’re close enough for him to kill. 

Wait, kill?

He doesn’t know what he’s doing, but he can feel himself pull out his blades out one moment, and the next when he snaps out of his trance, he sees that you’ve collapsed. 

“No, no, no, no, no” he mutters, kneeling down “I told you, I fucking told you to stay away. Why can’t you listen?”

“Asshole” you choke “Because I fucking love you that’s why. I know why you’ve been avoiding me and I get it but, that was kind of a dick move” 

“Shut up” he says, wiping tears from his eyes as he tears up his coat and wraps it around your gut, cringing when he sees how much blood you’ve already lost. He puts the remains on your shoulders before standing up. 

“Watanabe?” 

“Watanabe to Forsaken, the commandant is injured, they’re in the ruins south of the base. Don’t bother looking for me, I won’t be there. That’s an order” he says into his comm piece before taking it out and crushing it. 

“No, you’re not leaving me” you yell “Watanabe you fucking ass, we can find a way, we-” 

He kneels down and captures your lips in his. It’s a custom the humans of the Forsaken told him about, kissing, a romantic gesture among humans. 

“I’m sorry, commandant. But there’s no room for us right now, not ever actually” 

You yell at him to come back, but he’s already gone. He takes one last look at the ruins and feels the buzzing on his lips before running further and further away. Never to return and never to know if you were safe.

Lee

How did it come to this? He was so careful, he made so many promises, he trained so hard. But here he was, mangled and missing his arm with the punishing virus slowly clouding his mind. While you leaned against the wall on the other side of the ruins full of dead corrupted. 

He winced when he felt the virus progress further in his system. Fuck, he’d have to do something about that. But first...

“Commandant, are you alright?” he asked, breathing heavily. 

You didn’t say anything but you seemed alright. A minor scratch on you cheek, but you’re fine. Not in any sort of danger. Perhaps you weren’t very mentally sound though, you had just witnessed Lee get his arms torn off and watched him destroy twenty or so corrupted. You were bound to be a bit shaken, but you’d be alright. 

“Lee...” 

“I have some bad news, commandant” he said slowly “I’ve been corrupted. And I fear I don’t have much time left” 

Oh what he would give to relive yesterday again. When he accidentally spilled his guts to you after you got hurt during a retrieval mission. You had only laughed and told him to take you to dinner if he were to say that to you. 

“We’ll fix it. We always do” you say, carefully making your way through the ruins and frames of dead corrupted. 

He doubles over when he feels compelled to take out his guns. When he feels like he wants to hurt you. He’d never hurt you. He couldn’t hurt commandant. Ever. 

“N-not this time” he says shakily. It’s progressing fast, he didn’t have a filter or any defences to protect against it. 

You’re just a few feet away, and he suddenly pulls his gun out. He wants to cry when he sees you freeze up with the most terrified expression on your face. And he does, small steady streams of tears make their way down his face as the gun shakes in his hand. He has to stop himself. He has to stop before he hurts you. 

Lee brings the gun to his head, his breaths laboured as he fights the punishing virus’ influence. 

“Lee, what are you doing?” 

He cracks a rare smile at you, well, one of the few smiles you actually catch. He’s fairly sure you didn’t notice all of the times he’s smiled around you. 

“I like you a lot commandant. Take that as you will” he says, before he hears the gun go off. Next thing he knows there’s nothing but ringing. He doesn’t get to see you scream and cry over his frame, your tears mixing with the blue vital fluid that flows out of his head. 

“I’d never leave you commandant. I promise” 

That’s the first and last promise he will ever break. 

[apparentlyaswarmofbees]

Let's kickstart the reopening of requests with some Levi loving moments shall we~

I decided to kind of merge both of them together, I hope it ended good~

Have a good day too~♡

I wrote this while having the newest song from E ve, Aono Waltz on repeat the whole time. It's so good

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Wave Vortex - A Leviathan x MC mini fic

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Summary

It happened so fast. Too fast.

If anyone asked Levi if he had ever been in love, he wouldn't miss a beat before replying 'yes'.

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Warning: uncensored swearing, Leviathan being anxious and insecure af.

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It was supposed to be a fun evening, he had finally put his foot down on his insecurities and asked his best friend, THE best of friends, to go on a date with him.

And they said yes, hells, they said yes.

He was on cloud nine for the entire week, day and night, during boss fights, anime episodes, even to the point of spacing out inside his fantasies while he was trying to rant to Henry exactly about said fantasies.

He was happy, so damn happy. But he was also scared shitless.

He was just so awkward, he couldn't do anything right except for being an otaku, he was ugly and couldn't even express himself unless he was roleplaying, he just knew he would ruin this, he knew.

But he was just so excited.

And now as he sat on a bench outside the human world Aquarium you two were supposed to be having a fun evening at, he couldn't help but think that he should have cancelled the plans and walked away as soon as he started having bad feelings.

Not that it wasn't fun at the start of course.

He may have had arrived one hour earlier than promised and probably made you feel bad about having him wait though for some reason you arrived only a few minutes after.

"I was just too excited to come" they had said, he knew they had to have known he left earlier and came rushing despise it all, he really is a pain in the ass isn't he?

But even so, the moment he bumped his hands with yours and you took a hold of his pinkie, his brain was mush all over again.

He tried his best to make it fun for you, speaking to every single aquatic life swimming around and translating to you whatever they were thinking.

"Oh... Oh!" He exclaimed

"What is it?" You looked back and forth between the demon and the silver fish staring at you two from the glass "what did it say?"

"I-It likes my eyes" he didn't know how to feel about being complimented by a fish, though Henry did cheer him up whenever he needed.

He could hear you chuckle from besides him and turned his head to look at you (he got a bit startled when he met your gaze, were you looking at him all this time?) "I like them too" you smiled, his eyes widened "your eyes kind of remind me of a sunset".

He was spluttering incoherent noises for a good five minutes after.

You guys even found a little place selling soft ice cream cones, he was a bit excited to find what flavor you would order, maybe next time you two hung out together he could pull one of those date moves and get an ice cream for the both of you...

"...What next time?" Leviathan hunched his back over his legs, hiding his face in his arms. Would there be a next time...?

It was all going so well, even though he was a nervous wreck and couldn't even fully grasp onto his best friend's hand because he was a coward just like that. Even then, even then, he believed the two of you were having enough fun, you told him so, and you were smiling, so at least part of it had to actually be true.

But of course, his younger siblings had to come a ruin everything.

And it happened so fast, too fast.

You asked to try his ice cream, now that he looks back at it, he isn't sure why because you two had gotten the same flavor afterall.

But he didn't think of that at the time and let you take a taste.

And he was just so hipnotized by your lips covered in ice cream, he seriously pondered if this was what Beel felt like while looking at food. That little smile, the small lap of your tongue as you cleaned the skin off the cold treat, and missing a spot.

He was going insane.

And that's when it happened.

"Just kiss already dammit!" Came a loud scream from not so far behind him.

It was familiar and high pitched, Asmo, and followed by a second familiar voice, Satan, telling the other to not yell.

But it was too late. The damage was already done.

The moment the lust sibling had finished his line the ice cream cone Leviathan was holding out for you fell off his hands in a jerk motion as he jumped.

Spilling all over your chin, neck and clothes.

Clothes you had specifically told him were your favorite and you had specifically dressed with because you spe cifically told him you also wanted today to be special.

Fuck

Fuck

"Fuck!" He exclaimed right there and then.

You looked down at yourself, mouth agape.

He couldn't stay there. He had to get away, away before you got angry, away before you officially declared all his hopes for naught.

And that's how he found himself trying to not have a full blown panic attack on the pretty damn unconfortable bench he found his sorry ass seated upon outside of the hellhole his brothers and their human housemate found themselves in. Well deserved for someone like him right?

Now that he thinks about it, he should have stayed and helped you clean up right?

"Fuck" he groaned before raising his head to prevent the tears gathering around his eyes to spill out.

He really just had to make a big deal out of everything and ruin it didn't he?

Why was he always like this?

"Levi!" Oh sweet lord of shadows he almost jumped out of his skin again, it was you. And you were running towards him.

He debated to himself if he should run away or stay, deciding that he already ruined things enough by not helping you clean up, he should start apologizing, maybe that will make you less angry-

He stood up, he couldn't make his feet move towards you but he was ready to speak, he could try to do damage control, he could do it.

He opened his mouth to speak but you were faster, you always were.

"Are you okay?"

And he felt so stupid all of sudden.

You weren't angry, you were concerned.

You shirt was clean though he could see it was still wet, why weren't you angry?

Well, he already knew the answer.

Because it was you.

You understood him, you knew he was already on a peak of anxiety the moment he asked you on a date a week ago, you knew him.

You knew him.

And so he couldn't help but start crying.

But this time he didn't hide, he didn't run. This time he reached for your hand first, this time he held onto it fully, this time he really looked at you.

"It's okay! I'm not angry!" He was making you even more worried and you didn't know if you should touch him or not "you're much more important than my favorite clothes! Well, it is still going to be a pain to wash it though-" he kind of wanted to let out a defeated laugh at that.

"I knoooow" he said in between tears. "I'm sorryyy"

He heard you sigh "I know" of course you did "and I forgive you" of course you did "and the day is not over yet, we can still do something fun today!" You paused, looking down, almost skepish "and I want to spend more time with you", he held his breath.

Of course you did.

"I'm sorry I didn't stay to help you clean" he finally let out in a husky voice. He wanted to blame Asmo, be angry at him for startling him in the first place, but either way he shouldn't have left you alone "if it stains I can try to find some kind of spell to get it off"

He looked down to his feet, his hand was still holding onto yours tightly.

You were quiet for a while, he was about to look back up when you did the job for him by lifting it up by his chin with your hand gently.

And you kissed him.

Deeply yet softly, gently yet passionatelly.

He didn't know what he was expecting but it definetelly wasn't this.

You cupped one of his cheeks with your free hand, his face stunned, but at least the tears stopped coming.

"I do love you Leviathan" was all that scaped those lips he was already starting to miss.

If anyone asked Levi if he had ever been in love, he wouldn't miss a beat before replying 'yes'.

Afterall he loved a lot of things: He loved his animes, he loved his games, he loved Henry and he loved his waifus and husbandos. He loved many things but, none of those things could ever reciprocate his feelings, not really.

And he was used to it, he was used to loving without being loved, it was safer, better, free of potential rejection.

But you loved him.

Even after so many times he ranted your ear off about something you probably weren't interested in, even after not being able to fully help when you felt bad other than keeping you company and entertained, even after he has proven himself to be too much of a coward to be fully honest with his feelings but still too stubborn to fully give up on them, even after he ruined your favorite clothes and left you alone to clean it up.

He really needed to step up in his game huh?

He felt his face burn and his heart burst, he wanted to look away from your eyes but couldn't.

Leviathan really did love a lot of things.

"I... I do, I love you too"

And one of those things was definetelly you.

[hanjo-love]

Hi hanjo chan :) i read somewhere that isayama has actually described levihan relationship that of a jian bird( which represents the relationship of a husband and wife😭😭😭😭) i wanted to ask is this for real???? If he has really said that then why do many people still reject the ship?🤧

Hello dear anonie ❤️

I'm honestly overwhelmed with you guys today, asking me for recommendations and my thoughts ksjsjskks freaking love this fandom 🥰

I've heard of the Jian-birds theory (and I'm head over heels for the symbolism 😍) but I haven't heard of Isayama confirming this himself tho. We all know Yams wouldn't confirm something this BIG that easily haha

But let's say he did confirm it. Why didn't it effect the fandom? My guess is probably because everyone knows, even the stupid morons ones hating on my queen Hanjo, that Levi & Hange are BFFs, soulmates basically ❤️ So they don't see this as overly romantic I guess (tbh the hypocrisy sucks, because if this would be the case with their ships, they would let the whole world know how their ships are canon, but that's some material for another talk haha).

I won't be talking now on how Levi and Hange complete each other character-wise (because hooo boooy this would be a never ending post haha) but the fact, that Levihan's injuries complete each other as well is just 🙌🏻 👁️👄👁️ ffs, no one can convince me Yams didn't plan this for like at least 60 chapters now. Probs since RTS.

As a matter of fact, I was sure Levi's gonna die, but the last two chapters convinced me otherwise. I don't really like what Yams is trying to tell us regarding the 104th. I mean I get it, he's trying to show us how the future is in the hands of the next generation bla bla bla. But geeez... it surely seems like there's no place in this story for anyone above 30 lmao I firmly believed Levi stayed alive, because he's a fan favorite. But rn I think he'll survive this for the sake of his friends, his comrades, the entire SC. I'm pretty sure his next goal (after fulfilling his promise to Erwin and the recruits, who died in the serum bowl arc) is living for their sake. I'm hella mad at Yams for almost completely breaking this man (FOR WHAT FUCKING REASON YAMS?!) and I just wish, Hanjo would be around taking care of him ❤️ but he's strong, humanity's strongest, he'll survive this hell and live the rest of his life in peace and loving memory of his dear friends ❤️ he ain't a suicidal maniac, like some "fans" want him to be because of his dead husbando/waifu lmao

Thanks for the ask anonie, this was quite fun to write down ❤️ have a lovely day/evening wherever you are ❤️

[belphiesreverie]

Dryad!Giorno x reader

The first mythical creature scenario is for @helenapizzatime who gave me complete creative freedom over her husbando

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Noise had always been a constant in your life. The traffic outside your house, the chatter of everyone around you; it seemed almost inescapable sometimes. It wasn’t as if you hated noise though. On the contrary noise had often served as a distraction from your mundane life, reminding you that even if it felt like you were stuck in time the world around you was still turning. Recently however, you had been searching for a place void of all distraction which was what had led you to the woods.

Nobody ever dared venture near the woods, refusing to even step foot in the ouskirts. You knew there would be no chance of anyone bothering you here. With your sketchbook clutched firmly in your arms, you slowly pushed your way through the trees that spread far as the eye could see. Another reason for traversing this unknown path was to document the beauty that it held inside. You had far grown bored of drawing the streets you saw daily or the people who walked the same route to work.

There were stories passed around by children and adults alike that a man lived in the woods. But he wasn’t human. The fear of the unknown was what kept people out; they were afraid of this mystery man who nobody knows even exists. Not one to back down to fear, you pressed even further through the trees. If such a man did exist, you doubted you would see him. The woods were too vast and dense that you would easily get lost if you strayed from the path that seemed naturally formed.

The rustling of leaves startled you, but you didn’t think much of it. This was the woods after all and many animals must have been living in here. Focusing back in front of yourself, you searched for a place to sit. A small opening would be nice but you doubted you’d find anything like that out here. Settling for a large oak tree, you set your bag down before sitting with your back against the trunk. Surveying the area around you, you found a clump of foxgloves that were fully blossomed. As you were grabbing a pencil from your case, a voice startled you.

“What are you doing out here?”

Jumping up from your place on the floor, you whipped your head in every direction but you couldn’t find where the voice was coming from.

“It’s not safe to be out here on your own. You could get lost.”

The voice spoke again. It seemed to come from every direction at the same time. The unknown speaker seemed to be concerned but you couldn’t tell due to the heavy distortion of their voice.

“Who are you?”

You weren’t expecting a response but it couldn’t hurt to ask. Yet, the voice spoke again. Clearer. Crisper. You could ascertain the locaton this time; it was coming from the large oak tree you were resting on not too long ago.

“Haven’t you heard the stories? The ones about the man who lives in the woods?”

You expected to feel afraid. The inhuman creature that lives in the woods was taking to you. The same creature that makes everyone afraid of the woods was looming above you, yet you weren’t afraid. His voice had a quality to it that seemed to calm your nerves, make you trust him. There was no hostility in his tone, no reason to be afraid.

“I’ve heard the tales, but I never believed them.”

A deep chuckle came from the being. Yet again, it wasn’t snide or sarcastic, rather intrigued. The leaves on the oak tree began to move as you assumed the creature began to climb down towards the ground.

“And why is that?”

His voice now came from just above the first few branches. If you looked closely enough you could see his feet. Strangely enough, they looked human.

“I had no reason to believe them until now.”

“Fair enough. May I ask again my earlier question, what are you doing out here?”

“What’s it to you?”

Another small chuckle came from him as he lowered himself to the ground but stayed hidden behind the trunk of the tree.

“Well this is my home. Technically you’re trespassing.”

You froze. He may sound friendly and welcoming, but he was correct. You were on his territory and he could attack you at any moment.

“I- I just wanted to draw the scenery. I apologise if I overstepped my bounds. I’ll be on my way now.”

You bent down to grab your sketchbook which you had dropped in your panic earlier, but a hand firmly held your wrist. Looking up from the hand, you saw the face of the man who had been hiding from you so far. He had a rather peculiar hairstyle with three donut shapes at the front leading into a braid that cascaded down his back. All throughout his golden hair was small flowers interwoven with his locks.

Realising he had been holding onto your wrist, he let it go quickly, almost as if he was flustered. He took a few steps away from you which allowed you to see him fully. His skin had the complexion of a normal humans but the green, mosslike substance that covered his whole body indicated otherwise. He wore a small skirt made of leaves and flowers on his lower halve but his chest was completely exposed. Vines seemed to originate from behind his neck and wrap around his arms and upper torso. If you had to describe him is one word it would be breathtaking.

“I-I don’t mind you staying, not at all. Actually... I was wondering if I could watch you draw. Of course you can leave if you want to, it’s just I haven’t had company in a while so...”

Slowly, you set yourself back down against the oak tree and pat the space next to you. The man’s eyes lit up but he quickly regained his composure and took the seat you had offered him. You picked up your sketchbook and grabbed a pencil before beginning to sketch out the foxgloves that you had wanted to draw earlier.

The two of you sat in a pleasant silence whilst you drew. You appreciated that he didn’t try to start any conversation whilst you were concentrating but you could feel that he wanted to talk so you placed your pencil down and turned towards him. He had been sat so close to you that when you turned your head, your noses were touching. Out of refex, you jumped back.

“Oh sorry, was I sitting too close?”

“Yeah... a little bit. Hey, you said you haven’t had company in a while, are there not more of your kind out here?”

“...No. Just me.”

He turned his head to look away from you, clearly upset. Shit.

“Um so, what do you do all day?”

“Y’know... watch over the trees. Keep them healthy.”

“Must get pretty boring.”

“It does.”

You fall into an awkward silence. You wish there was a way to cheer him up somehow, you did bring up such a sour topic after all. Before you could think of anything however, it’s started to pelt it down with rain. Worrying for your sketchbook, you quickly shoved it in your bag and jumped up to get to some shelter as fast as possible.

When you stood up, his hand instinctively grabbed yours. His features were contorted into a look of sadness as he scrambled to stand up next to you.

“Wait, don’t leave yet!”

“I have to, my sketchbook is gonna get ruined and I’ll catch a cold.”

“But I don’t want you to go! Can’t you stay for just a little while longer?”

“I’m sorry but I can’t.”

The hurt that you saw reflected in his eyes was enough to make you want to cry yourself. You could tell just how lonely he truly was.

“Look, I have to go but I promise I’ll come back tomorrow.”

“Really? You promise?”

His eyes shone with hope and gratitude. Just the mentioning of you coming back was enough to lift his mood. The smile that was etched into his face was absolutely mesmerising, even if it was just a small smile. You nodded your head in response to his question and turned to leave, but he pulled on the hand he still held in his grasp.

“Before you go... could you tell me your name?”

“It’s y/n.”

“Well y/n, I look forward to tomorrow!”

He lifted your hand to his face and placed a delicate kiss to the back of your hand before releasing it.

“Y-yeah, me too... uh...”

“Giorno. Giorno Giovanna.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow then, Giorno.”

And with that, you turned and headed down the path you had followed earlier.

[that-crazy-five-foot-two-chick]

In which I stan Winry Rockbell and Riza Hawkeye

I've seen posts hating on Winry and Hawkeye saying they're underdeveloped characters despite the fact that they're the two biggest women in fma, but while I'll admit that Lan Fan is a bit of a stock butler character, I've never seen those two as such.

Winry isn't just your little housewaifu in training waiting with an apple pie for husbando to get back from saving the country. She's (for most of the series) a teenager who was a MECHANIC from childhood and is REALLY FREAKING GOOD at what she does and not only that but she has to be really good at anatomy and estimations of growth because she's dealing with the combination of human and artificial mechanics. The boys aren't the only scientists in the joint.

And yeah, Ed is one of her main clients because he's an idiot and also he's growing and has an insane budget thanks to the government.

Yeah, she happens to be the stationary one waiting for him to get back but he also couldn't wait to get back. See: the time he got impaled but decided he couldn't die bc he promised Winry he wouldn't make her cry.

Yeah, it happens to involve her cooking an apple pie for the boys, but that was due to nostalgia. Gracia was the one who taught her to make apple pies, so the pie bit just shows even more depth of character through her love for the Hughes family.

Now Riza Hawkeye I have fewer arguments for, but I think there's more to her than meets the eye. She always thinks more than she says.

My theory is that she really didn't have any goals of her own besides righting the wrongs that her father's flame alchemy caused, and puppy guarding the only person who knows flame alchemy would be a natural consequence of that goal. She trusts him, but also needs to be there if he gets out of hand, which did in fact happen.

Just going to insert the fact that a heck of a lot of teenagers have no idea what the heck they want to do with their life and have no particular goals, so they just end up doing whatever life throws at them. Okay, back to the main thesis

So what about the time she asked Mustang to burn off her back tattoo so no one else could learn flame alchemy? Was she underdeveloped then? What about when she gave Envy whiplash figuring out that he (they?) wasn't actually Mustang and shot him in the head? Was that poorly written?

Yes, her entire role is as Roy's assistant, but it is not her entire purpose.

Her purpose in being his assistant, as I see it, is threefold. 1) she trusts him and his goals of becoming führer to overturn a corrupt government broken country from the inside 2) she needs to be his bodyguard so that she's on standby if he's in danger or if he puts other people in danger due to misuse of his flame alchemy and 3) he's as much of an idiot as Ed and needs to be constantly prodded if he's actually going to accomplish any paperwork anything

So yeah thanks for coming to my essay I got the idea to make this post after skimming this one

[soshortstoryteller]

Auto-tag supposed to be an ask away but nah

01: Do you have a good relationship with your parents?

Yes! I’m aware of how lucky I am even if my dad is sometimes insufferable. Nothing compared to some of my friends’

02: Who did you last say “I love you” to?

My mom ^^

03: Do you regret anything?

I used to regret not taking up music when I was 7 and offered to, but now that I’ve finally started guitar this “to-do-thing” is checked and the regret faded away!

04: Are you insecure?

It depends, but normally i’m not except for when my latent anxiety wakes up :’D

05: What is your relationship status?

Lots of husbandos and waifus and in love with myself

06: How do you want to die?

Peacefully and old

07: What did you last eat?

A SOUP THAT HAD EGG, HAM AND CHEESE IS MY MOM A MASTERCHEF OKEY? OKEY.

  08: Played any sports?

Currently starting w/ skate and formerly karate and dancing

09: Do you bite your nails?

Sore finger instead :DD

10: When was your last physical fight?

When I was 12 in the middle of the high school’s corridor (the guy was bullying me okey? okey.) 

11: Do you like someone?

I like lots of people, starting with myself and finishing with you ewe

12: Have you ever stayed up 48 hours?

Nah I always want to sleep

13: Do you hate anyone at the moment?

All of the rapists in the world 

14: Do you miss someone?

MY FRIENDS BECAUSE I CAN’T SEE THEM SO OFTEN NOW 

15: Have any pets?

Oh Alá 

16: How exactly are you feeling at the moment?

Lazy. Does that count?

17: Ever made out in the bathroom?

Of course, with myself if you know what i mean okno

18: Are you scared of spiders?

Only if they’re poisonous and their venom can kill me. Otherwise, THEY ARE CUTE, RON WEASLY!

19: Would you go back in time if you were given the chance?

YES I WOULD GO TO PREHISTORY AND TO VISIT SO MANY MYSOGINISTS, RACISTS ETC TO SLAP THEM AND WHILE I’M AT IT I OBSERVE THE TIME I AM IN ^U^

20: Where was the last place you snogged someone?

You’re getting annoying man. Somewhere in the SIMS.

21: What are your plans for this weekend?

Papers yay :DDD

22: Do you want to have kids? How many?

Yep! 1. At most 2 (and if so they must be identical twins or else an adopted teenager)

23: Do you have piercings? How many?

Nope. 0.

24: What is/are/were your best subject(s)?

Anything related to Humanities really (though Philosophy is the most difficult to me but i love it anyway)

25: Do you miss anyone from your past?

Nah, it’s more like nostalgia but not missing

26: What are you craving right now?

Worldwide peace, eradication of famine, capitalism and heteropatriarchy and, of course, Miraculous Ladybug E7 S2

27: Have you ever broken someone’s heart?

I’m not sure

28: Have you ever been cheated on?

Yes. Magnus promised me I was the only one and then he goes and marries Cleo. what a dickhead.

29: Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry?

I. Have. Been. Single. My. Whole. Fucking. Life. You. Tirseome. Topic.

30: What’s irritating you right now?

Your stupid questions about love

31: Does somebody love you?

I think I can affirm so

32: What is your favourite color?

Specially turquoise but there’s no color I dislike

  33: Do you have trust issues?

Maybe I trust to quickly

34: Who/what was your last dream about?

Something related to a performance and Merlí (TV show)

35: Who was the last person you cried in front of?

It’s been a while since I last cried... Maybe my mom?

36: Do you give out second chances too easily?

No, I give them if I think the person deserves it

37: Is it easier to forgive or forget?

To me, forgive. I can forgive, but it takes time to forget

38: Is this year the best year of your life?

ACTUALLY YES.

39: How old were you when you had your first kiss?

*facepalm*

40: Have you ever walked outside completely naked?

Nope but sometimes I think it’d be cool to give it a try

51: Favourite food?

Boof, I’d say meat + bechamel + coliflower but there are so many foods I like (Mexican, Japanese, Spanish, Italian, Arabic...)

52: Do you believe everything happens for a reason?

Yep

53: What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night?

Putting my bite plate on

54: Is cheating ever okay?

wtf give me a situation

55: Are you mean?

If I have to

56: How many people have you fist fought?

1

57: Do you believe in true love?

Yeah

58: Favourite weather?

CLOUDS. THUNDERS. COLD. IF THERE’S SUN IT HAS TO BE A WARM DAY OR IN THE AFTERNOON, IF NOT I KILL THE SUN

59: Do you like the snow?

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES

60: Do you wanna get married?

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

61: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby?

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

62: What makes you happy?

LOTS OF THINGS. HINT: NOT YOUR QUESTIONS ABOUT LOVE

63: Would you change your name?

No but yes. I like my name but I’d like to be called Dánae

64: Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed?

Taking into account it was my mom and I hung on her just to kiss her for like 5′ let’s say no

65: Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

Sex doesn’t exist, but if a friends falls for me I’d try to continue being her friend and not to mkae them feel bad

66: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around?

Duh

67: Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to?

*screams like Thomas Sanders* My dad. Happy now??

68: Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

Does my anthropology teacher in class count? His classes are so fucking deep and I love them

69: Do you believe in soulmates?

Yeah but I also believe in multiple soulmates 

70: Is there anyone you would die for?

I’m not sure

[by-glass-and-waves]

The husbando wall must be updated. Or I need a tier list?

Idk it's time to go back to my roots and add a new robot husband to it