#I personally like to think that he hasn’t changed his locks bc
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doueverwonder · 2 years ago
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Ngl I adore the hc that Liechtenstein has a key to Austria’s house. Because that either means,
A. Austria makes sure to get her a new key whenever he changes his locks
or B. Austria hasn’t changed his locks since 1918
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the-record · 3 months ago
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CASUAL.
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SUMMARY: you want all of her, but abby only wants a friend
PAIRING: college!fwb!abby anderson x reader
A/N: i hate this a little but this is for the person who wanted a casual fic under the abby tag this is for u 💋💋 ur genius bc yes i love abby&casual&chappell so yes here
my masterlist
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‘ I’M JUST A GIRL THAT YOU BANG ON YOUR COUCH ’
abby: babyyyyyyyt
abby: when ate you cming overrrrrrtt
angel: when you’re sober!
abby: boooooooooooooooooo
angel: i can come over tomorrow, i work tn anyways
abby: fine
abby: miss u
angel: miss u too babes
“you’re still with her?” dina asks while she reads over your shoulder. “didn’t she ghost you and come back like nothing happened?”
your thumb locks your phone as you turn it over on your lap. “so?” you turn to face the brunette, “its nothing serious anyways.” you have to defend yourself against dina and her girlfriend, ellie, way too often.
“tell that to angel three weeks ago crying in my apartment.” ellie piped up. “we’re just trying to be good friends.”
dina wraps her arms around your shoulders as you turn back around. “exactly babes, we love you.”
“whatever.”
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you’re both quiet. an artist you dont know sings soft words while crickets harmonize. abby’s fingers run up and down your bare back and yours tangle in her hair. usually, the girl has an ample amount of topics to bring up, but tonight the jar runs empty.
“what are we?” you question. abby’s hand slows before settling on your lower back, toying with the band of her boxers that you wear.
she sighs before answering, thinking about what to say. “friends?” you snort in response. “i don’t know, i told you i wasn’t ready for anything serious right now. you knew what you were getting into.”
you push off of her and sit up with a soft groan. her room is dark but you’re able to find the tee you wore when you came over. the girl reaches for your hand but you pull away.
“i’m going home for the weekend, if you want to come with.” she smiles when she sees one pull at your face first. “it’ll be fun, a couple days away to seattle? hm?”
you face the blonde, now propped up on her forearm, a tousled braid over her naked shoulder. you give in so easy. especially when her lips find yours.
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angel: can someone feed alice for me this weekend?
dina: yea ofc
angel: thanks hon
ellie: why cant u? wya
angel: going out of town :)))
ellie: with?
dina: stop interrogating her babe
ellie: no no
ellie: angel who and where
angel: seattle
dina: with who
angel: werent u on my side????
ellie: BRO
ellie: NO CHANCE OMFG
dina: angel dont omf
angel: i didnt even say who??????????????
ellie: ur so guility
angel: and youre so illiterate “guility”
dina: so defensive holy shit
dina: omg u are going with her
angel: omfg get off my dick
ellie: u literally never listen dude
angel: says u
ellie: tf does that mean
angel: cat?
dina: angel wtf thats low
ellie: ykw
ellie: she literally has a new girl every weekend
ellie: you’re just another fwb girl and u know it
ellie: have fun in seattle.
angel: i will thx xoxo.
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her dad is sweet, a surgeon as abby brags. you can tell they’re close. he is observant and does his best to make you comfortable. their home is cozy, fireplaces with incredibly old family photos on the mantle. her senior portraits are hung in the staircase. you learn a million and one things about her on the trip.
she loves blue. big hiker. could play board and card games all day. doesn’t love to smoke. she hasn’t changed her room since the 6th grade. they can make a mean chocolate chip cookie.
you learn one that stays in the front of your mind during breakfast, and lunch, and dinner, and the car ride home.
“this is all just casual right? you dont actually have feelings? okay good, as long as we’re on the same page.”
when you come home, ellie ignores you as she moves around cleaning the dinner mess in the kitchen. when dina asks how the trip was, you leave out one small part.
“it was great. we went on an amazing hike and her dad is so kind, i had a lot of fun.”
she offers dinner bur you kindly deny, saying you were tired from the drive and just needed sleep. she smiled and sent you off with a quick hug and an ‘i love you’.
you continue to see abby.
she’s softer and kinder after that weekend. she kisses gently and sweetly. she takes you out on dates. you call her name in the passenger seat of her truck in a field in the middle of nowhere. it’s different now.
you don’t tell dina or ellie.
abby’s name is brought up less when people gossip over who’s with who. you hear less of her rendezvous’ with other girls. less and less until it stops.
you ignore your feelings and enjoy the warmth of her while you still have the chance. her dad invites you back and you spend many weekends with the two, laughing and drinking wine on the couch. she sits behind you on the couch while you watch a cheesy rom-com, making fun of the cliches with you. many smiles shared and laughs sung.
your favorite sleep shirt stays at her place. her favorite hoodie is hung in your closet.
when you go out with her friends she drinks and teases you in front of them. your cheeks warm, you excuse yourself and she always finds you in the bathroom. an apology and kiss lead to more.
ellie slowly forgives you, you all hang out as friends again.
her dad says he thinks of you as his daughter.
abby says she thinks of you as a friend.
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angel: we need to talk
abby: woah sounds serious lol
angel: yes it is to me
abby: yea, okay. ill be over tn?
angel: okay, lmk ill unlock the door.
abby: see u baby
angel: see u
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abby knocks, she always does.
abby smiles and sits on the edge of your bed.
abby shakes her head when you start to talk.
you can’t do this anymore. “i’m done abby. we’re done.”
shes confused though, “what do you mean? i thought we have fun.”
and you do, shes not wrong. but you have fun as ‘friends’ and not lovers. you hold her as a friend. you kiss, and make love, and drink, and laugh, together, as friends.
“i told you i didn’t want a relationship!” she counters. abby stands and grabs your hands. “i wasn’t ready, you cant be mad at that.”
you smile and shake your head. “im not mad, im just over it. i want more. a label, a sense of security abby.” you sit and pull her down with you. “i dont want casual.”
when she leaves you finally open up to dina and ellie. they’re quiet, but its comfortable as you speak and they understand.
abby texts an apology that night and you react to it, a heart.
when she texts again you don’t answer.
‘ I HATE THAT I LET THIS DRAG ON SO LONG
NOW I HATE MYSELF ’
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maladaptive-day-dreams · 2 years ago
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Think of Me
Steve x gn!reader, angst, 1k words Inspired by the song Think of Me by Madi Diaz (song lyrics are bolded in the fic!)
CW: cheating (Stancy), mention of s3x/infidelity, yelling and fighting, angry reader, despondent but also undisturbed Steve (he’s accepted what he’s done and doesn’t care at this point)
Author's Note: omg wow I'm posting again whaaaaat. First person bc I didn't feel like going and changing it to you/yours, soz. I got a lil sad at this as a relatively new Stevie gal, but pls enjoy (also imagine this as the angsty kind of sad boi to follow...but don't feel too bad for him bc he cheated).
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I know that something is wrong. Steve has been off for the last few weeks but I don’t know why and he hasn’t said anything. He’s been distant, less affectionate, only brief kisses on my cheek when he’s leaving versus the usual heady lip-locking. I can’t remember the last time he initiated sex, but I can remember the last time I heard him jacking off in the bathroom even though I told him I was up for it. Or the last time I heard him leave the house and come back three hours later smelling clean, but sweet.
It has me anxious. Like all of my atoms are under attack. But I don't wanna say nothing so I don't react.
I’ve been silent, haven’t brought it up or made it known that I felt him pulling away. No, I don't even notice him.
He’s in the kitchen and I’m in the bath.
“Yeah, I can't play normal and you can't pretend,” I say through the open doorway. I know he can hear me. I see his back tense as he pauses washing the dinner dishes.
“What are you talking about?” he scoffs.
“I can’t pretend that I don't know where you go, anymore.”
He turns, his face marred with a question but his eyes know what I’m saying. He wipes his hands with a dish towel before closing the distance between us and leaning against the bathroom door. I lean on my arms atop the side of the bathtub.
“Am I not enough?” I ask. Before he can interrupt I keep going. “Is it because of what happened last spring? With Vecna?”
He tenses. His eyes focused on the tile floor in front of him.
I continue.
“I know where you go,” I laugh, throwing my hands up and sinking back into the lukewarm bathwater. “I know where you go. Do you think I don’t notice? How you leave in the middle of the night? How you only to come back to bed hours later with damp hair and smelling like Mike?”
He looks at me at that.
“Are you that daft? I buy your body wash. It’s always the citrus one because you can’t stand any other scents, they give you headaches. But when you come back to bed you smell like Irish Spring. I know that’s what Mike uses because that’s what his mom buys him when she comes through my line at the grocery store.”
“You’re crazy. I go to the park and run and then sneak into the pool showers and that’s what people leave there. You know I have nightmares and that running helps.” He starts to turn around, back towards the kitchen
“Then how do you explain your clothes smelling like her room.”
He hesitates. And I stand up in the bath.
“I’ve been in her room before, I know her perfume. For fucks sake we made out for the first time on her bed two years ago at her Halloween party, of course I know what that room smells like. We made one of my favorite memories there that night.”
He doesn’t say anything. I dry myself off and put on my pajamas that were sitting on the toilet lid.
“I hope you fuck her with your eyes closed. And think of me.”
“Y/N,” he whispers, hand reaching for mine when I pass him as I leave the bathroom.
“No. I hope you love her with the lights low and think of me. Think of me waiting here staring at the ceiling, checking the clock for when you come home.”
“Please. You know we have history, you know that.”
I turn and face him. His eyes are watery, red, sad. “Yeah, yeah I do. But I thought you loved me? I thought you were over her? I thought you were just friends now?”
“We’re bonded,” he says grabbing my arms. “With everything we’ve been through, there’s no way I can live without Nancy in my life.”
I stare at him, waiting for him to continue his attempt at redemption.
“We never expected it to happen. We didn’t want to fall back into it but it just— We just did. It was familiar, it was comfortable, it was comfort for us.”
“Being with me wasn’t comfort enough? You had to go back to her?”
Angry tears dampened my cheeks. I ripped my arms from his grasp to wipe them away.
“I hope you fuck her with your eyes closed," I repeat. "I hope looking at her makes guilt burrow into your stomach. Put the shame off with some Benzos, swallow the feeling while you walk home. And think of me. Always.”
Steve’s staring at the floor again. Refusing to look at me.
“You aren’t even denying it anymore. All of the color has drained from your face.”
Nothing. No apology.
“I’m sorry and I love you is noise that you make now. Nothing more, they don’t sound like they used to. Like any feeling you had behind them has disappeared."
“I’m sorry,” he whispered.
“Y’know at first, no, I didn't even notice you stayin' out—Stayin’ out all night. I didn’t think you’d be in her bed, running your fingers down her thighs. Lickin’ your lips in the low light. No, I didn't even notice you come home and kiss me with her chapstick on your lips. I didn’t think you’d do that to me. To us.”
“I-”
“We talked about marriage, Steve!” I yelled, storming into our shared bedroom. He doesn’t follow. “Kids! A life outside of this hellhole!”
I’m throwing as many clothes and things as I can into my duffle bag.
“But now?” I ask, slinging the bag over my shoulder and shoving my feet into my sneakers.
I walk back to the kitchen. He looks defeated. He’s not even trying to save this, to fix this.
“Fuck you, Steve.” I spit, anger mixing with heartbreak. “I can’t-I hope you fuck her with your eyes closed and think of me.”
It’s all I can think of now. I have no words, no defenses, no pleas. Just: “I hope you love her with the lights low and think of me. I hope you fuck her with your eyes closed, put the shame off with some Benzos, swallow the feeling while you walk home and think of me always. Think of me, think of me always.”
I slam the door behind me as I leave and head for anywhere but here.
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thetomorrowshow · 2 years ago
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every hand’s a winner
trust au masterlist - previous
I COME BEARING FLUFF.
also a little note: due to personal reasons, i will be stepping away from social media for an unforeseeable amount of time. because of this, fics/updates will be posted once a month on the second tuesday either until i get back or until they run out. for january expect some esh au, and the next part of hubris in february :) additionally, my queue will be posting every other day either until i get back or until my queue runs dry (unlikely, as there are close to 300 posts in it lol).
forget all that, though!!! bc i have some people being happy for you!
cw: blood and injuries
~
Scott goes home that very evening, like most of the other emperors—bar Jimmy, who is slated to stay overnight in the infirmary. They’d tried to keep Scott as well, fussing over his bloody nose and torn skin, but he’d promised to check in with the Rivendell healers at home to make sure time in the Void of the End won’t seriously affect him.
For once in his life, Scott willingly goes to the Rivendell infirmary, leaving with a couple of bandages and instructions to write down any strange symptoms.
The thing is, nobody has ever fallen into the Void before—let alone the one in the End—so there’s no way of knowing what might happen further down the road. Scott’s an anomaly of sorts, and it looks like he’s now the subject of a medical study.
He hasn’t noticed anything apart from a slight lingering dizziness, so he writes that down, feeling somewhat stupid about it being the only symptom he has to report, especially when that could be caused by a myriad of other things. It’s not like he’s never been dizzy before. He practically didn’t stop being dizzy back before he figured out how to sleep.
That night, he luckily doesn’t have to deal with his insomnia—he’s up until the sun rises meeting with various advisory groups: working out the best way to lock down Rivendell whilst still keeping trade routes open, mobilizing the layman army, and deciding how to go forward with various declarations of support for other empires. Within the night, four different ambassadors turn up to arrange an alliance, and Scott knows that his fellow emperors are awake dealing with the same things.
He doesn’t get a moment alone until well into the next day, after he has to send out a formal announcement that his and the Codfather’s betrothal is postponed until after the war (if Jimmy still wants such a relationship, of course). He can tell that many of his advisors don’t necessarily agree with this decision, but they recognize the direness of the situation (and Ilphas, Aeor bless them, defends Scott’s choice with a fervor), and allow the postponement to occur.
It’s past four in the afternoon before he finally has a moment to relax, kicking off his boots and bathing before changing from the travel clothes that he’s been wearing for almost two days straight into something clean. The sight of Jimmy’s robes in the closet next to his almost makes him cry for some reason, but he pushes past them to the back to dig out a pair of hose and a skirt, tucking an embroidered but comfortable tunic into them.
He can’t sleep.
Several months have passed since the torture of fWhip’s basement, his wounds entirely healed, but he can’t quite convince himself he’s safe to sleep alone. He really thought he’d be over it by now.
It’s no use trying, of course—after so many long hours, he doesn’t want to risk a panic attack. Instead, Scott lies in bed and just breathes, trying not to think about all the war preparations that he’s just spent hours making.
He also tries not to think about Jimmy.
That’s a whole other issue to deal with.
For a couple of minutes, he’s able to lie there in peace, shutting down any thought as soon as it breaches his mind.
Then his bedroom door opens.
Scott sits up, ready to reprimand whatever servant is entering—he’s in his private quarters, he could be without his veil—but he’s not meant to have a veil anymore, is he—
It doesn’t matter anyways, because it isn’t a servant at the door.
It’s Jimmy.
“Hey,” Jimmy waves awkwardly, slipping in and shutting the door behind him. “How—how’re you?”
Jimmy looks terrible.
Well, he looks beautiful, as per usual, but his fall through the Void has certainly taken its toll. There are bags under his eyes, his hair greasy and limp, and he walks with an unsteadiness that tells Scott he’s been experiencing the same dizziness. Most notably, his face isn’t bandaged anymore.
It had been hard to see in the End, when Jimmy’s face was pretty fairly just a mess of blood, and impossible to see when there had been bandages plastered on half his face, but it’s clear now that Jimmy’s lost almost all of the scales on his face.
They had run in patches up from his throat to the line of his jaw on both sides, some speckling across his cheeks and a handful clustered around both his mouth and eyes. Scott had always found them gorgeous, little sparkling jewels on his face that truly brought out the flecks of green in his eyes. Now there’s maybe three around his eyes, ten total over the entirety of his face. In place of all the missing scales is torn skin and scabs, blood shining on his jaw from where the scabs have split.
Scott feels a little sick looking at it. Jimmy’s throat is still wrapped in bandages, and he can see some tied around his hands, so he can only guess at how many are missing across the entirety of his body.
He’s not sure why the dressings are gone from his face, but those wounds look ripe for infection. They shouldn’t just be out in the open.
“Jimmy, where have your bandages gone?” he asks instead of replying, swinging out of bed. “You need new ones, come here.”
Jimmy follows him into the washroom that leads off from what was once their joint sitting room, fidgeting nervously with the hem of his sleeves. “They made me take them off at the door,” he explains. “To make sure it’s me, and all. It looks pretty gross, I know.”
“No, it’s not—it’s—I don’t want them getting infected, is all it is,” Scott says absentmindedly, digging through his healing chest for the proper materials. He finds a basket of bandages and a roll of gauze, which he removes and sets to the side. His hands pauses over a regen potion, glancing uncertainly at Jimmy.
Jimmy shakes his head. “No potions, doctor’s orders,” he says. “They’re afraid it won’t . . . grow back right. It’s a wait-and-see thing at the minute.”
Scott passes over the regen and the health potions, landing instead on some disinfectant ointment. He closes the chest and gestures for Jimmy to sit on it, turns away to wash his hands before twisting open the ointment.
Jimmy doesn’t sit still as he applies it, jiggling his knee and wincing and pulling back every time Scott touches him. His injuries must really hurt, then—Scott’s being as gentle as he can, barely touching his cheeks as he rubs the ointment in.
“Sorry,” he murmurs when he cleans a particularly ugly patch and Jimmy actually cries out a bit. Jimmy shakes his head, face twisted into a lopsided grimace.
“It’s fine,” he grits out. “Thanks.”
Well, it’s not as if Scott was going to let Jimmy patch himself up. He’s not sure what he’s getting thanked for.
He finishes up quickly and efficiently, hesitating at his mouth and eyes. The bandages are too blocky to work with the curves there, so he tears one up and uses the pieces to line any awkward spots.
Jimmy really doesn’t look any better once he’s done, covered in so many bits and pieces of bandages that barely any skin is showing. He forces a smile anyhow, shows Jimmy his reflection in the mirror.
Jimmy stares at himself for a long moment. “I’d laugh if I could move my mouth that much,” he comments, and the smile on Scott’s lips becomes just a bit more real. He’s making jokes. That’s got to be good.
Then Jimmy takes one of his hands, and Scott’s heart skips a beat.
“What’s this?”
Scott follows his gaze down to his hands—Scott’s knuckles have similar bandages wrapped around them.
“Same as you,” he says, flexing his wrists. “I escaped with just losing a bit of skin, fortunately.”
Jimmy nods. “Right. Scales—on a fish, perfect protection. Bit weak when you combine it with normal skin. It—it makes sense.”
“And you were in there for longer,” Scott adds. Jimmy shrugs, looking away and down. Every which way, except for back at him.
Scott leads the way back into the sitting room, gestures for Jimmy to take a seat on the sofa (it’s his favorite spot, Scott knows, the velvet of that left cushion still brushed back weird from when he’d been sitting there last). Scott almost sits in his preferred armchair, but makes a last-minute decision to sit beside Jimmy on the sofa.
They’re quiet for a moment, and it isn’t a gentle quiet, nor a comfortable one. It’s awkward, filled with tension, and Scott’s certain they keep looking at each other but never managing to catch one another’s eyes.
He’s got to say something, but all he can think about is Jimmy’s exhausted eyes, love confessions falling from bloodstained lips, impulsive kisses and a slippery grasp on his lover’s bleeding face.
He has to say something.
But Jimmy speaks first.
“I really like you,” Jimmy says, looking away, and Scott takes the moment to gaze at him, truly take in the fatigue lining his face and the droopiness of his eyelids. “I didn’t—I have for a while. Months, really. Ever since . . . I don’t know when. I just—well, I tried, that one time—” he grimaces— “I just . . . I didn’t feel worthy, I suppose, of you. You’re—Scott, you’re so perfect, always all put-together and—and rescue-y and everything, and I’m just . . . me. Gosh, I’m sorry for rambling—I really just meant to say that I like you and—and I kinda hope you like me too.”
Scott blinks.
If his heart flipped when Jimmy took his hand earlier, it’s positively doing cartwheels now.
Jimmy likes him.
And apparently, all that pining was for waste because he could’ve confessed this whole time and Jimmy would’ve reciprocated.
Scott can’t help it: he laughs. Just a little, a giggle that slips out accidentally, but it’s enough that Jimmy freezes and glances over at him, eyes terribly fearful.
Scott waves frantically, pushing closer to him. “No, no—I—I wasn’t laughing at you,” he’s quick to correct. “I was—Jimmy, I’ve liked you for ages, but I was so afraid of you rejecting me that I didn’t dare say anything. Just think what might have happened if we both actually used a bit of logic for once in our lives.”
Jimmy blinks. A surprised laugh bursts out, one that’s quickly stifled as Jimmy winces and covers his mouth. It’s really not funny—it must hurt to laugh, with his face in such a state—but Scott can’t help it. He laughs again, lightly punches Jimmy on the shoulder.
“Don’t laugh,” he reprimands, still laughing himself. “You’ll start bleeding again, and we can’t have that.”
Jimmy clearly can’t help it, his shoulders shaking as he struggles to not even smile. Scott’s smiling too, he’s gazing at Jimmy beside him as he tries not to laugh and. . . .
He’s really in love, huh? Because Jimmy’s always shone like a star, he’s always been so breathtakingly beautiful, but he’s somehow so much more so now that he’s his. Now, Scott gazes at him, wave after wave of glory hitting him like waves of heat from the sun.
He’s in love, and it’s wonderful.
“Um,” Jimmy says after a moment, and Scott realizes that not only is he staring at Jimmy, but Jimmy is staring right back.
“Sorry—” he starts to say, looking down at his hands, but Jimmy interrupts him.
“I actually—I know you’re busy, with . . . with everything going on, and I am too, but if you wanted to just have one night before all that? I’d still like to—to go stargazing with you.”
It’s wartimes. He only has the one night to offer Jimmy, and no promises for the future.
Scott smiles. “I would be honored.”
-
There’s no snow on the ground where they pick to stargaze, a stone shelf in the side of the mountain that Scott’s lain on many times past. He spreads out three blankets on top of one another and leaves a fourth bundled to the side, in case the air gets too chill.
Jimmy splays out immediately, just like how he’s always first in bed—an incredibly intimate thing for Scott to know, and something inside him seems to almost purr at the realization. Jimmy is his, and he is Jimmy’s (at least for tonight).
Scott eases himself down next to him—his lover, Jimmy’s his lover—and, in a split-second decision, shifts a bit closer so that their hips touch.
Jimmy doesn’t move away.
Scott’s heart flips a little.
Exor’s hooves, you’re acting like a teenager, he tells himself. You like him, and he likes you. Just—be normal.
He can’t be normal. There is no way he can be normal.
The world around them has been gradually growing dark the entire time they spent hiking up to here and setting up, and now it’s dark enough that Scott can barely see Jimmy’s face.
He hadn’t been able to see Jimmy’s face then, either.
He’d seen him fall.
Scott had just caught sight of it as he regained his sense of balance from the End portal. He’d looked up to find an unfamiliar island, the world surrounded by the darkness of the void, and on the other side of the island—
Even from that distance, Scott could tell that Jimmy’s fall was the most graceful he’d ever seen.
He spread his wings and took off without a second thought, abandoning the others who followed him through the portal.
He had to try. He had to.
He’d passed fWhip, who was laughing—who tried to grab him—as he went over the edge of the island.
And then, wings pulled tight to his body, nose down, he dove after Jimmy.
“Scott?”
He blinks, looks around. Jimmy’s at his side now, head propped up on his arm. Jimmy quirks an eyebrow, still barely visible. “You good? You kind of zoned out for a second there.”
Scott blinks again, looks up. The stars are starting to twinkle into vision, bright and lively, and Scott almost waves up to them.
Perhaps Jimmy doesn’t know much about elven beliefs, doesn’t know the significance of the stars. He doesn’t know that Scott could point out a dozen or two elven legends and heroes—Gelidrian, Calireth, Alinar. And others, more mundane—his parents, the nurse who had raised him, the palace guard from a mere two decades ago.
Someday, Scott knows he will join them all. Hopefully not any day soon.
“Whoa,” Jimmy whispers. Scott glances over at him, his face illuminated by the exaltation of elves. One of his hands is raised slightly. “They're so close.”
“They really are.”
They watch in silence for a while, more and more bundles of light appearing in the sky. When the entirety of the Stags is visible and bright, Scott points it out, taking Jimmy’s hand (his heart jumps, Jimmy’s his lover) to trace his fingers down the lines of stars.
“That’s the Clash of the Stags,” Scott tells him, tracing it over again. “On the left is Aeor, see His antler?”
“That’s your god, isn’t it?”
“Yes, that’s Aeor.” Scott smiles just a little bit—somehow, every time Jimmy knows something about elven history, it makes him ten times more attractive. “And then below Him and to the right is Exor, His brother.”
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“I’ve heard you say his name before. Is he your god, too?”
Scott can’t help but snort. “No. Exor may be Aeor’s brother, but they don’t get along. Exor was cruel, controlled those under his domain, sacrificed the weak and oppressed the followers of Aeor. Aeor, meanwhile, ruled with kindness and respect, befitting of the last remaining gods.”
“What happened to the others?” Jimmy asks. “There are others, aren’t there?”
“Yes, we believe so. I’m sure you’ve heard Pix mention the Great Slumber?”
Jimmy nods, the movement scrunching up Scott’s sleeve. Jimmy’s so close to him, close enough that Scott can feel his every twitch and breath.
“Aeor and Exor were the only gods not to fall asleep. But when Exor became corrupted, jealous of his brother’s rule, Aeor knew He had to do something about it. So He gathered all His power and wielded it in a mighty battle against Exor—the Clash of the Stags. See how Aeor is kicking Exor down?”
Jimmy nods again. The nerves in Scott’s arm are tingling at his every touch, and he has to take a moment to swallow back the squeak that threatens to break his voice. “Um. Aeor used everything He had to seal Exor and his followers within a mountain forever,” he says, thankfully with no cracks. “Then He withdrew from the people, still hearing their prayers and granting small blessings, but separate from them. He lost much of His power in that fight, and has spent many thousands of years resting and caring for us—as any god should.”
Jimmy’s silent then, and when Scott looks over at him, he’s staring up at the sky, eyes flicking from point to point. Scott doesn’t look away, and while Jimmy’s eyes trace the stars, Scott’s eyes trace Jimmy’s face.
In the dark with the stars as their only light, the raw patches around his mouth and eyes that they hadn’t been able to bandage are invisible. The lines of exhaustion are impossible to see, as are the shadows Scott knows ring his eyes.
Instead, Scott sees the way his nose twitches. He sees long eyelashes that flutter gently. He sees golden hair that’s starting to curl around the gills, long in a way Scott’s never seen it. He sees lips that move soundlessly, lips that are looking more and more kissable by the second.
“There,” Jimmy says, and Scott pulls himself out of his reverie to follow Jimmy’s finger. Scott squints up at the sky as Jimmy traces a triangle shape out of the stars.
“That can be the mountain,” Jimmy says, sounding proud of himself. “The one that Aeor trapped them in. Do you guys know where that mountain is?”
Scott giggles a little—he can’t help it, it has to be a crime to be so cute—and traces along Jimmy’s triangle as well. It’s part of another constellation, he realizes after a moment—the Crystal of Rivendell, made up of stars of rulers who have passed on. “The mountain probably wasn’t real, Jimmy. Rivendell scholars have searched for it for literal ages, and they’ve not found evidence of it yet. Besides, I find it hard to believe that a mountain could entrap a god.”
“It was a magical mountain, you said so,” Jimmy says stubbornly. “Aeor sealed it. And I think it would be a great idea—some mountains are older than the ocean, you know, surely they have some sort of power.”
“Well, when you fight a god, trap him in a mountain and let me know how it goes.”
Jimmy laughs too, then cuts off abruptly as a cold gust of wind blows over them. He shivers, shifts close enough to Scott that he’s practically curled up in Scott’s side, head resting on his shoulder.
Scott’s certain that his heart actually stops.
Which is stupid, because—because they’ve done this before! Almost every morning, Scott wakes up pressed into Jimmy, and it’s fine. Well, it’s nerve-wracking and overwhelming and suffocating, but it’s been weeks since he last blushed and apologized, and much longer since he stopped pretending that Jimmy isn’t a very physically affectionate person. Romantic intentions or not (and now, in retrospect, Scott knows that most of them likely were romantic in some way and isn’t that something), Jimmy hugs him or leans on his shoulder on a near daily basis. This isn’t anything new.
Somehow, though, it’s the strangest sensation he’s ever known.
He’s been quiet for some time, he realizes suddenly, and before he even knows what to say he’s blurting out, “What’s your favorite constellation?”
Jimmy jerks a little bit. “What?”
“I—that’s how it started, isn’t it?” Scott says, and he just knows he’s paler than the stars right now. “You asked me what my favorite constellation is. Which one’s yours?”
Jimmy doesn’t answer immediately, pulling back a bit to gaze up at the stars properly. After a few moments, he takes Scott’s hand (the hairs on his arm stand up) and guides him up, much further to the left than the Stags. There, he traces out a strange shape—almost a lopsided rectangle, but with five sides.
Below it are two stars that are very familiar to Scott, he realizes with a jolt—
Staying up late every night—he’s just a child, he ought to be in bed, but instead he creeps over to the window and looks up at the stars.
His nurse had taught him to make a wish on the point of Aeor’s antler, and if the God was willing, his wish might come true. Scott can’t really remember where it is most of time, but he can always find those two bright stars to wish on—and that way, he would get two wishes!
He wishes twice for himself, or sometimes he uses one for Xornoth, or sometimes he uses one for his parents.
Most of the time, though, he wishes twice for himself—and he wishes for a friend.
Jimmy traces it again, the soft bandages on his knuckles rubbing against Scott’s matching set. “That one. That’s my favorite.”
“What is it?”
Jimmy’s hand falls to his side, almost in slow motion. “I don’t know,” he says, and there’s something wistful in his voice, something terribly sad. “But it feels like home.”
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It gets too cold to stargaze, so Scott packs everything up and helps Jimmy back to the palace, flying in through his window so as not to get caught out by the guards.
And sure, it may be the beginning of the end of the world, war hovering over them like the executioner’s axe, but Scott can’t stop giggling. He and Jimmy are sneaking around like teenagers, trying to not be seen as they clamber in through his window. It’s so very cliche that he can’t help but enjoy it, can’t help but be entirely wrapped in the feeling of new love.
They both collapse onto Scott’s bed, both laughing, even though Jimmy’s covering his mouth and wincing like it hurts. He doesn’t stop, though, eyes sparkling as he snickers.
“The funny thing—the funniest part is, it’s not even funny,” Scott gasps out, and it isn’t—he thinks they’re more laughing because of the absurd pressure it is to sneak into a building that you belong in in the first place. It’s more stupid than anything—it would have been just fine to go in through the gates, really, but they’d decided to do it proper just for the fun of it.
Jimmy laughs harder at that, cutting himself off with a small “ouch!”. He presses his sleeve to his mouth for a moment before pulling it away, examining it for any blood. Apparently satisfied, he lets his arm fall and stretches out a bit.
“This was really good, Scott,” Jimmy says after a minute, and dear Aeor, even the way Jimmy says his name. . . .
“Can I kiss you?”
Scott blinks, sits up. Jimmy’s watching him, a blush spreading across what’s visible of his face. He almost looks just as surprised as Scott feels that those words fell from Jimmy’s mouth.
And really, props to Jimmy, because it’s not a bad idea. It’s a very good one, in Scott’s mind.
But they really need to talk about it first, don’t they?
Scott sits up, runs a hand through his hair. “I’d like to apologize, actually. For our first kiss.”
Jimmy frowns. “Yeah, I—it was sensory overload, yeah? I don’t think you need to apologize for that.”
“Wha—when did I say it was sensory overload?”
Jimmy sits up too, scoots along until he’s sitting beside Scott. “Well, I didn’t figure it out until today, actually. I sort of thought you hated me at first, but yesterday, when . . . and then again, earlier. You said—you’ve liked me this whole time, right?”
Scott nods.
“Right. Well, I figured if you did like me back then, you probably wanted to . . . do the whole kiss thing. And it’s really not like you to just run away like that. And I know you get sensory overload real bad sometimes, so. . . .”
Scott slides his hand toward Jimmy’s, loosely tangling their fingers together. It’s a conscious movement, one that sends nerves sparking up and down the very bones of his body.
It’s dangerously close to too much.
Yet it’s everything he’s wanted for so long.
“How about this,” Jimmy continues. “We—we’re . . . courting now, right? Um—that—that’s really nice to say—so how about we always ask first, before a kiss? And stuff like that. That way, neither of us is taken by surprise.”
Thrills go up and down every inch of Scott’s skin when Jimmy says that they’re courting, his breath stolen from his chest. They’re courting. They’re in a committed relationship. Jimmy is his, and he is Jimmy’s, and it’s true because Jimmy said so. It’s real.
“That—that sounds good,” he manages. He takes stock of himself—definitely on-edge, but he can handle one kiss. As long as they make sure it’s just one. And maybe if they do some pressure cuddling afterward.
“Can I kiss you?” Scott asks, his voice almost a whisper. What’s visible of Jimmy’s face under the bandages goes through a series of emotions—anxiety, enthusiasm, warmth, and then settling back on anxiety. He nods, a little uncertainly, and turns to fully face Scott, drawing his legs up criss-cross on the bed.
They’ve kissed three times before, but everything is different about this one.
There’s an awkward sort of lean-in, of course—the first and second times had been sudden, passionate, and the third filled with the thrill of survival. For this, they move slowly, telegraphing each movement carefully—akin to trying not to spook a wild stag, Scott thinks offhandedly.
And then their lips meet.
Scott’s always led kisses in past relationships, his lips slotted above his partner’s, but Jimmy takes the lead here, leaning up a bit to match Scott’s height—and Scott thinks he likes it. His lips are warm, far warmer than Scott’s, and wet, and so very very soft.
It’s not the burning fireworks of their first kisses, but it’s warm like a cozy evening by the fireplace—there are so many nerve endings, he can feel his shoulders start to raise at the overstimulation—and it’s Jimmy and he loves him so much and it’s overwhelming, it’s perfect, it’s underwhelming compared to the first time because Scott knows that Jimmy has very sharp teeth and knows how to use them—
But Jimmy pulls away after just a moment, their lips parting slowly, and offers a small smile. “Good?”
Scott can only manage a squeaky noise in the back of his throat, and Jimmy giggles. The sound is a little bit loud for his sensitive ears.
Scott stands and pulls off his cloak, muttering something about putting on softer clothes before ducking into his walk-in closet. He can hear Jimmy laughing behind him.
Normally Scott would consider himself the smooth one—why is he so uncollected? He can’t even find the words to make any sort of dirty jokes. Jimmy must think something’s wrong.
(And so many things are wrong, of course, but definitely not this.)
He changes into soft pajamas, emerging to find Jimmy having also changed—he’s in a loose shirt and shorts, hair mussed and occasional bandages wrapped around his arms and legs. Luckily—or unluckily, depending on how one looks at it—his face and hands had taken the brunt of the damage, only a couple of patches bandaged on his arms and even fewer on his legs. Jimmy smiles brightly when he sees Scott reenter.
“I sort of assumed I’d be staying the night. You looked overstimulated, do you need anything?”
Scott points to the bed. “Sleep?” he suggests, swallowing half of the word back. Jimmy nods, pulls back the covers.
“Do you want me on top of you?”
Scott can’t help it—he snorts. Jimmy goes totally red, sputtering incoherently.
“I—you know I—Scott!”
“Very forward, Jimmy, and on the first date too—”
“Oh, come off it!” Jimmy shakes his head, sighs, then adds, “We’ve been engaged for a while now; I don’t think it counts as a first date.”
Scott quirks a brow, and this is more familiar, this is how their banter is meant to be, flirtatious and comfortable and not at all awkward. “So you’re saying you’re open to it?”
“You are a menace,” Jimmy tells him, but he’s smiling, and it really does feel like before all of their issues. Except now Jimmy’s actually his, and the awkward dancing around each other in a newfound relationship hasn’t passed, but maybe they can become like this again soon enough.
Scott climbs into bed, turning down the lamp on his way in. He curls on his side, pulling the blankets up to his waist, his wings resting on the cushioned shelf built into his bed for this precise reason.
After a moment, the bed shakes as Jimmy climbs in beside him, then slowly, carefully, rests an arm around Scott’s waist.
“This okay?”
The weight of his arm is heavy and warm, the perfect amount of pressure, and Scott rolls to be fully on his stomach before pressing closer. When his head is up against Jimmy’s chest, and their knees are bumping at every readjustment, he nods.
He can be close to Jimmy. He doesn’t have to be self-conscious about wanting to touch him. He doesn’t have to restrain himself in private, pretend that the physical affection is all for show.
Scott moves one arm up, wrapped under Jimmy’s arm and up his back, and sighs. This is comfortable. This is right. This is real. Their bodies know how to fit together, weeks of practice in their sleep lending subconscious knowledge to Scott as he presses up against his lover, his Jimmy.
This is real, he tells himself, and it’s perfect.
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reaperkaneki · 8 months ago
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ok here are my Thoughts on gin noto
under cut bc it got long lol
first off, he is very strong representation. as in, i think this might be the platonic ideal of a transmasc character. which has its good points and bad.
sweet-p’s arc was rooted in some obviously transphobic jokes/points/etc but at its core, her arc felt well-intentioned and overall she was definitely portrayed as one of the most sympathetic of the musicians (who are antagonists but certainly not outright villains, which the musician route makes abundantly clear). she also is not, like, described as trans per se, mostly as a crossdresser who loves cute things and wishes she were a cute girl (so like, she’s trans) and honestly her arc is about self-image and body dysmorphia in general (weight and age and outside perception are all major factors). and that’s what sets her apart from gin, gin is very much about Gender Dysphoria And Conforming To Societal Gender Roles first and foremost.
unlike sweet-p’s writing, gin’s doesn’t have any overt flaws to point to, which is why i had to mull it over for a while to figure out what was missing, and i think it’s because it is very much aimed at a cis audience. the narrative itself is perfectly fine, it’s the meta-narrative that bothers me.
when gin confesses that irl, he was assigned female at birth and presents as female in his day-to-day life, and asks the player, does this change anything, there is a right answer and a wrong answer. the wrong answer is to tell him that you don’t care what gender he is, it doesn’t change anything at all; gin perceives this as a half-assed, dismissive response said without thinking and becomes upset and it locks you out of the rest of his character episodes. the correct answer is to tell him that you don’t know, you’re not sure. maybe it does change things between the two of you. gin feels that this is a understandable position to take, like, of course it might be a big deal, it certainly feels like a big deal to him!
and yes, to someone who hasn’t encountered a trans person before, that’s probably a reasonable response. to me, specifically, a fellow transmasc person, i think i sorta laughed at this part because, like, the only thing that would change if a coworker or friend or whatever told me that they were actually stealth trans this whole time (and that’s being generous bc gin is Not Slick lmfao the foreshadowing for him being trans is super obvious to anyone who knows) i’d be like cool! love that for you. etc etc. bc transgenderism is Normal to me.
but the game assumes You Are A Cis Person Who Isn’t Sure How To React To Trans People. the game doesn’t let you be trans. there’s not a nonbinary option, despite having a cyborg for an antagonist and, more egregiously, a canonically nonbinary character in your party. (i’d say pronouns, but that’s not quite the same in japanese.) not that i was expecting that to be possible, but it is a clear separation of gameplay and story that hinders roleplay (in an rpg where your character’s backstory is almost completely undefined)!
this is not to say that gin is poorly written. like i said, he’s like the platonic ideal of representation. he’s easy to clock specifically because his experiences ring true; he’s always, always, always overcompensating and posturing “as a man”, he’s trying to conform to his own personal image of “what men do”, “how guy friendships work”, “what guys are interested in”. when asked why he gets along with women so well, he lies and says it’s because he has an, uh, older sister! so he’s spent a lot of time around women! he dresses trendy, but not too fashionably (because that’s feminine, he’s function over form allegedly), and the cut of his clothes is soooo. well. the silhouette is masculinizing, or at least androgynous, let’s say. he even wishes he were taller.
i’m pretty sure i’ve done most of those things. this is writing that either speaks from experience or understands the prompt and has done the goddamn research.
it is, however, very, VERY cool that he actually turns out to Not Be A Man, at least in the sense he’s always wanted to be. REALLY good nonbinary arc that i wish wasn’t constrained to, like, the last two character episodes. it’s the one interesting ‘twist’, and i love that it explains a lot of things about him! when he talks about working as a woman irl and busting his ass in heels, he sounds proud, even as he admits that presenting female always made him uncomfortable. and lo and behold, his catharsis effect sports a pair of gold heels! if he was just a hypermasculine trans man, that would be super uncomfortable, as if it were some sort of transphobic indicator of his ‘true self’ being feminine. but no, it’s because he’s hiding that aspect of himself. he repressed his masculine tendencies to conform to social norms, and then inadvertently did the same to his feminine side, but both are important. he likes the heels.
i also like that he’s bi and acknowledges that his relationships never worked out bc he hadn’t figured out his shit yet. it do be like that sometimes.
unfortunately, i think he’s also kind of boring? like, besides her wanting to be a cute girl, sweet-p had other stuff going on, she had that boke/tsukkomi routine with stork, she had a genuine love for yume-kawaii (whereas while gin has many interests, a not-insignificant part of those interests is male posturing), she was even a musician! i understand that gin’s blandness is On Purpose because he dislikes rocking the boat (but he hates posers, which was a genuinely interesting reaction from him that didn’t feature as strongly in his arc as i wanted. even kiriko comments on it), but doesn’t change the fact that he ain’t weird enough! can’t even be an only sane man bc he goes along with everyone’s bs lol
anyway gin is cool and well-written as a trans character but missing a bit otherwise. i’d still definitely love to hang out and get beef bowls and boba with him :)
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silenthillmutual · 1 year ago
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this is labeled in my google docs as "like a swarm of bees" bc of that one section in "no self control" and if you wanna see the whole thing. idk let me know.
Frost sits, knees drawn up to his chin, back against the railing, and rocks back and forth. A self-soothing technique he hasn’t used since childhood, his left thumb rubbing the back of his right hand, pensive. The night has only just begun, but it feels as though he’s been here forever.  He needs to rest, but he doesn’t think he can. His mind races, and each time his eyes close he sees horrible things he can’t quite parse. What he wants is for it all to stop, but something tells him it never will. His time in Yharnam has changed him.
He pulls his cloak tighter over his shoulders, cocooned, and rests his forehead on his knees. His breath rises up his mask, wetting his cheeks and fogging his glasses. Strangely, he dreams of touch - of being weighed down, from his shoulders to the small of his back. He catches himself digging his teeth into his lower lip, and stops; his thumb remains, biting into his wrist. He left those chances behind him when he sought out blood healing. 
Something steps in front of him, but the sound doesn’t snap him to attention. He knows this area well by now, and it is frequented by neither monster nor man. If something is here to kill him, let it. Just as long as he doesn’t have to move.
“That's funny, I didn’t think you slept.” Frost swallows, thumb dragging down his wrist. The polite thing would be rising to greet his visitor, but Frost isn’t really in the mood to exist right now, much less exist in the presence of another person. He measures each inhale and exhale as he locks himself into place, unnaturally still. Maybe if he doesn’t make any sign that he’s available to talk, Alfred will just walk away. It’s not like either of them is going anywhere soon. Whatever he has to say can wait. 
Three minutes pass in awkward uncertainty. Then the steps grow closer, and for a horrifying second, Frost thinks Alfred is going to try and move him - pull him to a stand and cart him off somewhere. His body tenses to the point of shaking, preparing to fight Alfred off; but the presence shifts to Frost’s left, wind blocked by a larger body taking up space next to him. A warmth accompanies him, distracting but not unpleasant. Frost opens his eyes, vision sliding over his thighs as it attempts to slide to his left. He feels like a child again, peeking out from under his bed. Just as then, he can’t articulate what it is he’s hoping for. 
Alfred unties the chords holding his cape in place, and Frost looks away as his mind makes leaps and bounds in disrobing the man next to him. He’s surprised, then, when the cape drapes over him. It’s not as heavy as he’d have thought, but the warmth across his back is nice all the same. “I can’t can’t quite tell if you’re awake,” Alfred continues. “Either way, I will wait.”
okay i have succeeded in writing oc/canon. i may never post it but it has been written.
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spectorbear · 3 years ago
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— still alive part 1
pairing: steven grant x f!reader x marc spector
summary: as an old friend of marc spector, you were quite used to healing him. when he pops back up in your life after a year, you have a hard time pushing your resurrected feelings back down. especially when you finally meet his alter, steven grant.
genre: angst, slow burn, eventual smut
word count: 2.4k
warnings/notes: reader has healing powers/abilities, lots of swearing, angst, and (seemingly) unrequited feelings; depictions of wounds and blood (nothing too descriptive); my first moon knight fic bc i can’t stop thinking about him; not completely in line with actual moon knight plot 
masterlist | next
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“I DIDN’T KNOW WHERE ELSE TO GO.” His voice was laced with pain. 
Opening the door revealed your oldest friend, hunched over as he clenched his side. Blood dripped from his head and nose, but you were more focused on the excessive amount he was trying to contain in his palm. 
“Holy shit, Marc.” You pulled him into your flat. You scanned the hallway before closing the door, locking it and turning to him. “What did you do?”
“Doesn’t matter.” He stumbled to your couch.
You rolled your eyes, heading to lock your window. He looked absolutely awful as he sloppily leaned his head back, getting blood all over your furniture. You hadn’t even talked to Marc Spector in… a year? This wasn’t how you expected to spend your Saturday morning.
You kneeled in front of him, sitting on your knees in front of his spread legs. He was still gazing at the ceiling. In any other setting or with any other person, this would lead to something different. 
He changed a lot in the year you hadn’t talked. He got a bit broader, hair got a bit longer...but he still had the same bags under his eyes and the annoyed look in his eyes. 
“And why hasn’t Khonshu healed you?”
Your hand grabbed his, lifting it from his wound so you could see what you were dealing with. Closing his eyes, he just let you do what you needed to do.
“He’s busy.”
“Busy.” You repeated. You tried to stifle a laugh, but it came out anyway. “Of course he is.”
He hissed when you started to peel up his shirt. It stuck to his skin with blood and sweat. You couldn’t even see where the blood was coming from, his chest was decorated in bruises and cuts. He looked like shit.
Placing your hands on where you assume the wound started, you finally looked up at him. 
“It’ll only hurt for a second.”
“I know.”
Your healing could only do so much. Most of the time, it took too much energy for you to fully heal someone. When you and Marc were younger, before he was Khonshu’s avatar and before he was even a mercenary, you still ended up in this same position: healing your friend because he got into trouble.
You felt the energy leave your fingertips and leak into his blood, finding its way to his skin.
The searing pain your hands caused made him clench his jaw. It started from your hands and crawled into his veins. His hands gripped your forearms instinctively, tightening around you as the pain became almost unbearable—only for all of the pain to leech from his body all at once. He had almost forgotten what that felt like.
With a sigh, you moved from him. You fought the urge to reach for his forehead, or cup his jaw to examine his face.
You were a bit lightheaded, but you needed to grab something to clean him up.
Marc sat up, watching as you ran a cloth under the kitchen sink. He touched his head and side, assessing his previous wounds that became nonexistent. 
“You fully healed me.”
“That’s what you came here for, was it not?” You handed him the cloth. “Clean up before you get any more blood on my damn couch.”
“So your powers got stronger?”
“I got stronger.” You corrected. You crossed your arms and leaned against a bookshelf that divided the rooms. “And please don’t try to make small talk with me, Marc, and just tell me what the fuck is going on with you.” You paused. “We both know you didn’t decide to just stumble here in the middle of the night for no reason.”
He sighed. He stared at the cloth, now red, in his palms.
“I told you..”
“You didn’t know where else to go. Yeah.” You interrupted. “We both know that’s bullshit. You came to me for a reason, and it was more than just you needing to be healed.”
Marc pushed his tongue against the inside of his cheek, considering your words. 
You knew that he wouldn’t tell you. 
You knew that he only stumbled here because you were his only friend, and even now you both knew that you considered each other friends still. You knew that he would keep every single thing to himself, no matter how daunting it was, to protect you and to protect himself. 
You shook your head. “You’ve always done that.”
“Done what?”
“You always hold the truth at such a far distance that you don’t ever see it until someone points it out. It isn’t lying.” You paused. “But it almost is.”
He flicked his eyes to yours, still sitting on your couch.
You felt a familiar ache in your chest, an ache that you thought you had rid yourself of years ago. It was as if nothing had changed and everything was the same as you left it, your heart bleeding for the man in front of you.
“I’m sorry, you know.” He told you.
“I know.” You lifted yourself off of the bookshelf with a sigh. “Alright. Better question. When’s the last time you ate something?”
His face flooded with confusion for only a moment. “Um, yesterday? I think?”
“Great.” You turned back to the kitchen, scraping together something easy to make. “Eggs and toast sound good?”
“Yeah.”
Marc stood, following behind you. He placed the bloodied cloth in the sink as you started to cook. 
“I used to have more control.” He finally said. You felt his eyes on you. “But recently it’s gotten worse.”
You froze for a split moment, keeping your focus on the food. “With Steven?”
“Yeah.” 
“Mm.” You thought aloud. “So he still doesn’t know?”
“I try my best to maintain everything.” Marc explained, body to your side. “But I’ve gotten sloppy. It’s been harder to keep him under.”
You turned to him, catching his gaze. His brown eyes were so familiar it hurt. You’ve missed him.
“You know how I feel about it.” You said.
“I know. But I can’t do that.”
“Don’t you think it’ll be easier? If you just tell him?” You left his eyes and continued to cook. “You two could...”
“I’m not doing that.” You could feel his glare on the side of your face. “And the longer I deal with Khonshu, the more messy it’s getting. The faster I’m done, the faster I can leave him be.”
That made you spin on your heel. “Leave him be?”
“Yeah. The minute I’m done with Khonshu, I’m going to let Steven live his life. He’s far too... innocent—naïve—for all this.”
“So you planned to... what?” You piled the food onto a plate. You felt anger in place of the previous feelings, whatever they were. “Leave completely? No goodbye, no anything? Just... disappear? Like that?”
“That’s...”
“Yeah, whatever, Marc.” You shoved the plate into his hands. “Eat and then get the fuck out of my apartment. You’re pissing me off.”
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You knew for certain that you loved Marc Spector years ago. 
Your love for him was instant, a sandstorm of emotions that hit you all at once. Knowing him at eighteen was nothing like knowing him now. He used to be so free... so careless and lighthearted. 
That’s how he always ended up in your arms. 
Marc would get hurt doing something so stupid, like running and slipping, or pestering a bees nest, or getting into fights with boys bigger than him. And he would always come to you for your healing hands. 
But he would always be sand in your fingers. Falling away as you try to grasp it all. 
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Marc Spector interrupting your life had been on the forefront of your mind as you tried to return to your daily tasks. You thought that you had pushed those feelings of love deep, deep down. Especially when he told you about Khonshu, and Layla, and everything that kept you from being a prominent figure in his life.
You were walking down the street when you caught sight of him. 
Again. 
Twice in the matter of two days. More than you had seen or heard from him in a year.
“Marc?” You asked as you moved towards him. 
He looked frantic, holding a bag with a goldfish in it. You had healed him the night before, but he still somehow managed to get another bruise on his cheek during that time. 
He met you halfway. If he looked exhausted last night, he looked absolutely dreadful in the day. 
“I killed his fucking goldfish.” He said, as if that explained everything. He sighed and rubbed his hand on his face. “I seriously can’t do this shit.”
“You killed a goldfish?”
“I forgot to feed Steven’s fish.”
“Looks alive to me.”
“He’s gonna know.”
“I’m so confused.”
“Steven’s fish only had one fin.” He held the bag to your face. “I can’t find a one-finned fish anywhere. He’s going to know that something happened and I’m going to have to explain everything and everything is going to go to shit and...”
“Okay, okay.” You didn’t stop yourself this time. This time, you snatched his face into your palms. You forced him to look at you, his brown eyes scanning you frantically. “Calm down, yeah? Take a breath.”
Marc blinked, drinking in your presence. You hadn’t meant to calm him down with your abilities, but sometimes it just came out.
You took your hands away the moment you realized what you were doing. His bruise was gone.
“You didn’t have to do that.” He told you. He always knew when you used your powers. As if he could read your mind and body.
“I didn’t mean to.” You replied. “Everything will be okay. Maybe Steven won’t notice.”
“He’ll definitely notice. He has this whole routine that he does.” He looked at the fish. “I guess I’ll just have to... hope.”
“Good luck with that.”
You decided to leave it at that. Moving past him, you left him there and headed to work.
You couldn’t pretend to be his best friend again. And you couldn’t let yourself drown in him like you used to. It felt much like when you hear an old song; nostalgic and painful all at once.
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Marc Spector used to be your favorite person.
He made you feel good. He made you feel like a normal person, despite your healing hands and weird connection to things he couldn’t see. He made you feel like a human being.
Even when he asked you to stop his bleeding or get rid of a black eye, he made you feel seen.
You were finally getting used to doing all of that alone.
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Your phone rang later that evening. You had just returned to your apartment, plopping onto the (still bloody) couch.
Marc’s number popped on the screen.
“Hello?” You answered.
“Hello.” The voice was not Marc’s.
“Why are you calling?”
“I—I’m unsure.” The voice stuttered. Maybe it was Mark, it had the same tone, but he was doing an awfully English accent. “Your name was in this phone that I found in my flat.”
You sat up. Steven. 
“Oh.” Was all you could say.
“Can you tell me—can you tell me what is going on here?” He was nervous. He sounded shaky, anxious.
You didn’t know what do say. You’ve known about Steven Grant for a long time, you knew that Marc was trying his best to make it seem like every dangerous thing Marc got into was merely a dream. You knew Steven had no idea what was going on. You knew that Khonshu needed Marc, not Steven, and you had no idea what all that entailed.
You couldn’t think of what to say. You couldn’t answer his question; it wasn’t your question to answer.
So you just hung up.
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Three times in three days should be a record.
You seen Khonshu first, the huge god leaned against his staff just outside the entrance of your workplace. He always looked intimidating in the moonlight; it was even worse during the day.
You were in your apron at the bakery, pouring a coffee, when Marc entered.
“I need to talk to you.” He said, cutting the line of customers that you were helping.
You were going to curse him out, yell at him about coming to your workplace and yell at him for interrupting your perfectly fine life in the matter of three days. You were going to throw a cupcake at him or something.
You were going to tell him about Steven’s call. About how he needed to just tell him what was going on. You were going to yell at him for bringing you into the thick of everything after being out of your life for a year.
But instead, you turned to your coworker, “I’ve got to go. Will you be okay for the rest of the day?”
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masterlist | next part
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please do not interact if you are under the age of 18. do not repost any of my works on any site.
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watchmegetobsessed · 4 years ago
Text
Hey Angel - Harry Styles
a/n: since i had so much time on my hand at work lately (not anymore unfortunately) i used it wisely and cooked up this PA themed fic bc i absolutely love this trope. it’s lengthy and kinda emotional? kinda, lol. hope you’ll like it and as always, feedback is much appreciated!!
warning: sexual content
word count: 11.5k
masterlist
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Harry likes to pretend he is tall enough to comfortably rest his chin on the top of your head when he stands behind you, but that’s not true. He has to push himself a little to his tippy toes and push you down at the same time to fit his chin above you, his arms weighing down on your shoulders. You stopped arguing him that you need to push your hips forward when he does this so you don’t carry his whole weight.
“Tha’s rude, you do not have to do tha’!” he defended himself every time you brought up, so you just stopped.
Now as you watch the game of air hockey unfold in front of you, a half empty pint in your hand, you don’t even budge when you feel a chiseled chin resting on the top of your head, you push your hips forward without a second thought to shorten your height. You catch a glimpse of a tattooed forearm on your shoulder, Harry’s chest presses against your back gently.
He doesn’t stay in this position too long, it’s making it hard to drink so soon enough, he wraps his left arm around your shoulders, coming to stand next to you, sipping on his tequila on the rocks.
“Hey you,” you smile at him as he gives you a side look, a boyish smirk tugging on his pink lips. “Everything alright?”
“Everything is fine.”
“You need something? How much have you had to drink?” you ask furrowing your eyebrows, looking down at his glass that was certainly full when you last saw him about ten minutes ago.
“Shush, stop pretending like you’re working,” he waves at your face, his words melting together, definitely thanks to the alcohol he has consumed tonight.
“I know I’m not working, I’m just tryna’ be your friend and look out for you.” Bringing your own drink up to your lips, you give him a look, but he just smirks at you playfully.
“Uh-huh, whatever. Don’t worry about me.”
“I always worry about you, H,” you sigh dramatically and it makes him laugh with his head falling back.
“Is this the part where you tell me I’m some spoiled brat celebrity you ‘ave to babysit for your living? And that I always do ridiculous shit so you ‘ave to keep an eye on me at all times?”
You can’t push your smile down at how far this statement is from reality. You just like to tease him about being a typical, asshole rockstar when he is literally your favorite person in the world without a doubt.
“Oh Angel, you can’t fool me,” he cackles, squeezing you to his side before taking another sip from his drink.
“Wouldn’t even try to,” you mumble with an amused smile. “Havin’ fun, birthday boy?” you ask, leaning into his side. You would never admit, but you love how touchy Harry can get sometimes, not really caring about physical boundaries, especially when he drinks. The hugs, the squeezes, the touches, they always make your heart flutter even after knowing him for years.
“I’m havin’ a blast. What about you?”
“What about me? It’s not my birthday,” you chuckle shortly.
“So what? I can’t make sure you’re enjoying your night?” he frowns at you dramatically that just makes you laugh.
“I’m having a great night. It’s just that my boss keeps coming after me even though I’m supposed to be off the clock.”
You peek up at him to see the grin on his face at your teasing. The dynamic between the two of you has been like this since day one. The constant bickering and teasing is what really brought the two of you close, you are so similar, it’s like you can see a male version of yourself when you look at him.
“Tell the dude to fuck off,” he mumbles into his drink and you bump your hip against him, but he just holds you tight to his side as an answer.
Soon enough, Harry joins the game and you watch him play from the side, obviously cheering on his opponent to annoy him, earning some pretty dirty looks from him whenever they score against him and you let out a “woho!” in victory.
“Y’know, it’s not too nice to cheer against the birthday boy, is it?” he calls you out when the table is taken by someone else and he joins you at the side again.
“Am I not allowed to choose who I want to cheer to?” you ask with a faked puzzled look and he presses his lips into a thin line, glaring down at you intently.
“Don’t test me, Angel,” he grumbles into your ear before walking off to join his friends who came out to celebrate with him today.
It’s a pretty lowkey celebration, since he is still in the middle of filming Don’t Worry Darling, so he couldn’t really travel far from the set, but some of his dearest friends were able to come here and celebrate with him and his cast members.
You stand at the bar and your eyes find him every time you scan the place, not able to keep your gaze away from him for too long, he just demands the attention. Or at least yours.
You’ve never met anyone like him. When you got the chance to be his personal assistant four years ago at the very beginning of his solo career, you never thought how he’ll move right into your heart and never leave it. Whether you look at him as your boss or your friend, you can’t deny that he changed your life and you’ve learned so much from him, you can only hope he thinks of you somewhat the same. However you always tell yourself: what could you possibly give for The Harry Styles? He has everything in the whole wide world.
Harry catches you staring and he arches a brow at you, abandoning the conversation he has been in for the past minutes, mouthing you “what’s up, Angel”, his accent thick even without hearing his voice.
He’s been calling you Angel for longer than you can remember. When you asked him why the nickname, he said it’s because One Direction’s song Hey Angel was written about you. It was a fat lie, you haven’t met him when the song was written, but his words still tightened your chest, playing with the thought of Harry writing a song about you.
As cheesy and cliché as it is, you fell for him faster than you’d like to admit. You tried to fight it for a while, convince yourself it’s just a silly crush, but you soon had to realize you outgrew that after the first few weeks working with him. How could you not fall for him? He is everything any woman could wish for and he has you wrapped around his fingers, just like he has half the female population, probably.
You shake your head in his way, not sure how to tell him you just got lost in your thoughts about him. In fact, he occupies your mind pretty much all the time, but he doesn’t have to know about that.
He excuses himself from the table and walks up to you, a slow breath leaving your nose as you watch him approach you.
“Tired?” he asks, stopping in front of you, placing his empty glass to the counter.
“Kinda,” you nod.
“Want to head home soon?”
“Don’t worry about me. I can just call a taxi and go home, you don’t have to come.”
“Don’t be silly, we go to the same place, obviously we’re gonna go home together.”
Since filming has started, Harry and you’ve been sharing a nice apartment near the set. It was his idea to rent a place for the two of you, rather than to stay at a hotel. At first you didn’t think it would be a good idea, but of course, he convinced you to live with him for the months while the movie is being filmed. So now you basically live with Harry, share pretty much all your living space with him, except your bedroom.
“But it’s your birthday, stay as long as you want,” you tell him, not wanting to snatch him away from his friends on his big day.
“We’re filming in the afternoon tomorrow, can’t drag the night too long either way,” he shrugs, trying to make you believe it’s really nothing.
No matter how badly you try to convince him to stay, he doesn’t bulge and starts saying goodbye within an hour, calling the two of you a car to take you home. He is clearly tipsy, but not drunk. Once you’re in the car, Harry’s hand finds yours and he pulls you closer in the backseat until your thighs are pressed together. He curls an arm around your shoulders, holding you tight to his side, sinking down in the seat. You let your head rest on his shoulder, enjoying the closeness of his body, pressing down any worrying thought that usually makes its way to your mind every time Harry gets a little cozier than the usual.
The rational side of your brain knows you should be keeping some distance from him for the sake of your own sanity and emotional health, but you just can’t. Denying these little moments from yourself would be like pure torture and your heart can’t take that for sure.
“What are you thinkin’ about?” he murmurs, his nose nuzzling into your hair and you just shrug your shoulders.
“Nothing,” you mumble your lie.
“Liar, I can hear the gears turning in that pretty head of yours,” he grins down at you as your eyes lock for a moment. Thank God for the darkness in the car, because you can feel your cheeks heating up. The last thing you need is for Harry to see how nervous he can make you feel with just a simple compliment.
“Stop being nosy, you don’t have to know everything all the time.” You poke his side with your elbow, it makes him jump a little before he snuggles back to your side.
“That’s not true, you know I’m entitled to hold every knowledge in the world.” He tries to hide his smirk, but he fails miserably and you just laugh at him with your head falling back to his shoulder.
“Harry Styles, you are something else,” you sigh shaking your head at him.
Arriving home Harry keeps an arm around you as you walk up to the front door, fishing your keys out of your bag since you’d bet Harry didn’t bring his. There’s a chance he hasn’t even used his copy since you’ve been here, he knows you always have yours and you haven’t really left without each other so far, always staying around the other.
“Want to shower first?” he hums, walking inside, his arm leaving your shoulders and though you feel lighter without the extra weight, you wish it was still there.
“Go for it, I’m gonna clean up the mess I made when I got ready earlier,” you tell him, heading into your bedroom where the floor is littered with half your wardrobe from earlier, when you were trying to figure out what to wear for the little outing.
Harry disappears in the shared bathroom and a moment later you hear the water running. You go around your room, picking up the dresses you voted against, placing them back into the wardrobe and then you put away your makeup you left on your bed in your hurry.
“Bathroom is yours!” Harry calls out just when you finish, you hear his bedroom door open and close so you grab a clean oversized t-shirt and a pair of cotton shorts before occupying the bathroom.
The warm shower feels nice, it’s been a long day since you started on set, Harry had a few scenes to film before you could leave in the afternoon. You wash away the day, scrub your makeup off and then take off the rest with your wipes once you’re out. You brush your hair and use some lotion for your dry skin before getting dressed and leaving the steamy bathroom.
Padding down the short hallway you hear nothing coming from Harry’s bedroom and you wonder if he’s already asleep, but once you step inside your room you see that he is cozied up on your bed, your covers pulled up to his naked chest, a pillow tucked under his head as he scrolls through his phone so shamelessly, as if it was his own room.
“Did you take the wrong turn in the hallway?” you ask with an arched eyebrow as you throw your dirty clothes to your temporary hamper, which is basically your emptied out suitcase.
“Nope,” he grins smugly, you have to roll your eyes at him. He locks his phone, dropping it to the side table, watching you move around, getting ready for bed and his eyes on your figure feel like they’re burning down on your skin.
“You know, it’s rude to stare,” you comment not even looking at him, but you just know he is still staring at you. Grabbing a hairtie from the little dresses in the corner of your room you reach back to loosely braid your hair, but his voice stops you.
“Wait,” he pleads and you furrow your eyebrows at him. “Can I do it?”
You give him a confused look as he pushes himself up into a sitting position, his green eyes are glimmering from the tiredness and the alcohol he has consumed tonight.
“You want to braid my hair?”
“Yeah,” he nods. You hesitate for a moment but join him on the bed at last, turning your back against him, giving him full control over your hair.
A shiver runs down your spine when you feel his fingers raking through your strands. He is so gentle and careful as you feel him section your hair off to three parts.
“Didn’t know you can braid,” you tell him, eyes fixated on the sheets in front of you.
“Gemma taught me, but I’m not the best at it.”
“So I’ll look atrocious?” you tease him smiling to yourself. He pokes the back of your neck with his fingers before continuing his work.
“You could never look atrocious, even if you tried.”
“And you are such a flirt,” you sigh. Over the years you’ve gotten used to his flirty act, it’s just who he is and though in the beginning your breath always got caught in your throat when he said something cheesy, now you just brush it off, only thinking about his words when you are alone in the night, struggling to fall asleep because you’re once again, thinking about him.
“M’telling the truth. Have I told you how beautiful you looked tonight?”
“Mmm,” you hum. He has told you that you looked pretty when the two of you left and he saw you walk out of your room in your black skinny jeans and flowy sheer top on, your hair loosely curled, but you didn’t really know what to say, so you just smiled at him and it’s the same now. You’re not the best at taking compliments.
“You really did. You always are.”
“And once again, you are such a flirt.”
“Complimenting a pretty woman is being a flirt?” he asks pretending to be offended as he carefully works on your hair and you wish you could see his focused face as he is trying to keep track of the sections between his fingers. At a lack of a witty comeback, you just shrug your shoulders, fumbling with your fingers on your lap.
You both fall silent as he concentrates on your hair and you manage to stop thinking, just focus on how his fingers keep brushing against your back every time he crosses two sections over each other.
“Hairtie, please,” he asks, his hand appearing next to you with his palm upwards. You place it in his hand and he finishes up his masterpiece. “There, it didn’t turn out as bad as I thought,” he comments once he is done. Reaching back you run your fingers over the braid and it feels good, he did a great job.
“Thanks,” you smile at him shyly, turning around. He leans back, making himself comfortable once again and you arch an eyebrow at him. “Need me to walk you back to your room, sir?”
“No, I’m perfectly fine here,” he grins smugly, tugging his arm behind his head as he takes up the right side of the bed.
“You’re planning to sleep here?”
“Please, don’t make me sleep alone on my birthday!” he pouts, giving you those damned puppy eyes. How could you ever say no to him?
“You better not push me off the bed in your sleep,” you mumble before getting under the covers.
You turn off the bedside lamp and the two of you start moving around, finding a comfortable pose to sleep in and you end up facing each other on your sides, Harry’s face squished into the pillow as his eyes are roaming over the hand you have laid between your faces.
His fingers start to inch towards yours until he hooks his pinky with yours, the touch sending a warm feeling down your spine.
“I hate sleeping alone,” he mumbles into the semi-darkness.
“Why?”
“Don’t you like it when there’s someone next to you? When you wake up and you’re not alone?”
“I like it, but I don’t hate sleeping alone either,” you tell him as your eyes fall to your linked pinky fingers. “Why do you hate it? You have the bed all to yourself, and there’s no chance of waking up to someone snoring or talking in their sleep.”
He huffs out a laugh as he buries his head deeper into the pillow.
“It makes me feel lonely. Which is ridiculous, because I’m never alone.”
“But lonely and alone are not the same, so it’s not ridiculous. You can feel lonely when you’re not alone.”
“I know,” he nods, his eyes watching your linked fingers intently, before he moves his hand so it’s now covering yours, his warm palm wrapping around your much smaller hand. “I’m never lonely with you, though.”
“So… you are only lonely when you’re sleeping or in the bathroom, because we basically spend every moment of the day together.” You smirk at him and see his dimple form in his cheek as he smiles at you nodding.
“That’s right. We are like glued together.”
“How aren’t we sick of each other already?”
“That’s never gonna happen.”
“You sure about that?” You raise your eyebrows at him with an amused smile, he is too sure about that answer.
“One hundred percent. You’re my favorite person.”
“Is that what you tell everyone?”
He gives you a look, but you just chuckle, sinking further into your pillow. His fingers start playing with your hand as he draws a deep breath.
“I only tell this to m’ mum and Gemma. No one else.”
Your heart starts racing at the thought of him seeing you on the same level as his closest family. You know how much his mum and sister mean to him, but you never thought you are anywhere near them in his eyes.
“You’re my favorite person too,” you whisper as your eyes meet over your joined hands. He smiles at you warmly, his floppy curls falling into his forehead and you want to run your fingers through them, feel how soft they are under your touch. Harry scoots closer, your faces only a few inches away from each other as he closes his eyes and takes a deep breath.
For a moment you just watch him, thinking how good it feels to have him in your bed. How amazing it is to end the day with him so close to you. You wish all days would end like this, you wouldn’t have another bad day with him next to you.
Lying there and watching him slowly fall asleep, his hand still on yours, the bitter thought eats itself into your mind that he is only here because he feels lonely and wanted to be close to someone, not you particularly. And though you’re glad it’s you he ended up next to, you try not to get too accustomed to the feeling, because you’re just a temporary fix to his loneliness.
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The door to Harry’s trailer opens and he walks in wearing his blue dress pants and crispy white dress shirt, fumbling with the top buttons to undo them. You glance up at him from your laptop where you’ve been working on his schedule for the upcoming weeks while he was filming.
“Hey, how did it go?” you ask as he places his water bottle to the vanity and then sits in the chair he spends his mornings in while his hair is being styled and tattoos are covered.
“Good. Messed up only a few times. Whacha’ working on?”
“Just your schedule, I’ll email it to you when I’m done, though you never check it.”
“Hey, I do check it! I like your color coding. I just suck at using it and you’re always here to remind me of the important stuff.”
You roll your eyes, continuing to type away on your keyboard as he moves around, having a snack and texting back people.
“Florence is coming over for a little after we’re done. We can order something,” he speaks up grabbing your attention again.
“Cool,” you nod with a small smile. “Is she staying the night?”
“No, we just thought it would be nice to hang out a little without dressed like this,” he chuckles looking down at himself.
“What’s wrong with Jack’s clothes? You look neat.”
“Do I?” he cocks an eyebrow cheekily, placing his hands to his hips as he looks down at you.
“Yeah. It’s a nice change after all the grandpa clothes,” you tease him and he gasps pretending to be offended at your words, though you both know you have nothing against his style. In fact, you love how he just wears whatever he wants, not caring what others would think.
“Watch your mouth or you can’t wear my bode jacket again,” he warns you holding up his pointing finger, shaking it at you, but you just chuckle at him, finishing up what you’ve been working on before shutting the laptop down.
“How long until you’re done?”
“Just a few more scenes. I think we can leave in about two hours.”
“Alright.”
“You done working?”
“Mhm, for now.”
“Come and watch the filming. You’re always so hidden in here.”
“Because I always have work to do,” you point out, putting the laptop to the side from your lap.
“Yeah, but you’re done now, so come out and watch me be the next Leonardo DiCaprio,” he smugly tells you, and it makes you roll your eyes at him.
“You’re so humble, H. Is something that comes with the age?” you tease him standing up from the small sofa, grabbing your phone from the table.
“You’ll find out in a year,” he smirks back as you follow him out of the trailer, back to the set.
Later that day you, Florence and Harry are chilling back at your apartment, munching on the pizza you ordered, watching some documentary on Netflix, just enjoying a lazy evening. You’ve become quite close with Florence, her personality is a lot like yours so you got along well from the beginning, the three of you often do things together outside of set.
You and Harry are sharing the couch while Florence is curled up on the loveseat. The temperature at the apartment is always nice, but you often catch yourself feeling a little cold in the evening, but it has more to do with the tiredness rather than with the heating of the place. When you pull your legs underneath you to warm your feet, Harry notices the action and knows right away that you’re starting to feel cold as always. Reaching down he grabs a blanket from the basket next to the couch and he wraps an arm around you, pulling you closer to him.
“Come ‘ere,” he mumbles, draping the blanket over the two of you. You shuffle closer to him, making yourself comfortable at his side as he makes sure you’re fully tugged in. Then he leaves an arm around you, his fingers gently grazing your shoulder as he turns his attention back at the movie.
Glancing over at Florence you see the puzzled look on her, but you ignore it biting into your bottom lip, turning back to watch the movie though you’re having a hard time focusing. All you can think about is Harry’s touch on you.
It’s almost midnight when Florence calls herself a taxi. Harry picks up the glasses you used and volunteers to wash them, leaving you and Florence alone in the living room.
“So, what’s up with you and Harry?” she questions right away without beating around the bush.
“What do you mean?”
“I mean that you two has always been close, but now… it seems all too… couple-like.” She narrows her eyes at you, hands on her hips, looking like a mother questioning her daughter.
“Don’t be silly.”
“I’m not,” she scoffs. Then you pretend to be busy with folding the blanket, but you can feel her intent stare on you before she speaks up again. “You like him, don’t you?”
“What?” you huff with a not too Oscar-worthy expression on your face that was supposed to hide the panic in you. “Well of course I like him, he is my friend and boss.”
“But not just like that. You like like him.”
“Florence,” you sigh, just when Harry walks out of the kitchen, oblivious to the conversation that he just interrupted.
“You sure you don’t want to spend the night?” he politely asks her, but she just shakes her head.
“I’m not really up for spending the night on the couch.”
“You wouldn’t have to, you can sleep in my bed,” he simply offers and something is telling you he shouldn’t open his mouth again.
“You’re not taking the couch because of me.”
“I wouldn’t, I usually sleep at Y/N’s,” he states as if it was nothing, but you instantly freeze.
Yes, ever since his birthday he has spent way more nights in your bed than in his own, always raving to you how well he can sleep when you’re next to him and you couldn’t bear the thought of him feeling lonely, so you’ve been letting him occupy half of your bed through the nights. He usually holds your hand falling asleep and then you wake up tangled together, sometimes he is cuddling you from behind, other times you’re the one curled up to his side. He treats it so casually, like it really is nothing, he just always goes on his day when you wake up so you decided to not make it into a big deal either.
Florence gives you a wide eyed look that you try hard to ignore, while Harry is so oblivious to what he just caused with his statement.
“I uhh—thanks but I’m fine going home. Besides, I think my car is already here. See you guys on set tomorrow. Y/N?” she calls out walking towards the front door.
“Hm?”
“We’ll talk later,” she tells you and it’s a strong message that she won’t just leave it at that.
“Uh, yeah, sure,” you nod awkwardly, waving her goodbye.
You and Harry clean up together and as always, he is the first one to use the bathroom and by the time you’re done, he is in your bed, waiting for you to join him. You don’t comment on his presence anymore, part of you afraid he would stop spending the night in your bed and you definitely don’t want that. Not much is left from filming, meaning that soon you are forced to go home where you and Harry do not live at the same place so you’re gonna have to sleep alone, like you did before. Only now you are way too hooked on the feeling of having him in your bed, even if it’s not in the way you truly want, it’s better than nothing.
The moment you get under the sheets, Harry reaches out and pulls you to his side. He hasn’t done this often when you went to sleep, only sneaking some small touches, but you don’t mind him being a little extra clingy.
“Filming is almost over,” you mumble into his chest, your hand lazily resting where his ribcage ends in his chest.
“Mhm.” There’s a short silence before he speaks up again. “What about it, Angel?”
“It’s just that it’s going to be weird going home. I got used to living here.” It’s your way saying that you’re gonna miss having him around all the time, but you’re not sure if he understands the hint. It doesn’t really matter anyway.
“You like cramped together with me?” he chuckles lowly.
“Was kinda nice,” you smile.
“Remember how you threatened me to throw my shit out if I leave my dirty clothes on the floor?”
“I do,” you smirk, thinking back to the conversation where you agreed to live with him while he is filming. “Didn’t find any clothes on the floor, so you get an A for that.”
“Wow, was this… a compliment?”
“Shut up, I always compliment you!” you laugh smacking his chest gently.
“Oh, no. You don’t compliment, you just tell me when I managed not to fuck something up,” he corrects you and your cheeks are heating up about how well he knows you.
“Those are compliments in my book, don’t be greedy.”
“M’not. I love how grounded you keep me with treating me like this.”
“Like what?” you ask furrowing your eyebrows.
“Like a normal person. With you, I don’t have to be afraid that I earn something because of who I am. You give no shit about my name, you always keep me in check and I appreciate that.”
“Can’t let you have a too big of a head,” you smirk, closing your eyes. He laughs with you, squeezing you a little before you both fall into silence, drifting off to sleep in each other’s arms.
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You’ve managed to avoid Florence in the past few days. Her burning look has been making you way too nervous, you know she wants to know more about what’s going on between you and Harry, but truth to be told, you have no idea what to tell her.
Yeah, I’m definitely in love with him and we’ve been sharing a bed for a few weeks because he feels lonely alone at night, so he uses me to ease the feeling while I just let him because as I said, I’m in love with the man.
No, you can’t tell her that.
Now there’s only two days left from filming, meaning that only two more nights to spend with Harry and it’s making you a nervous wreck to think about sleeping alone in your bedroom.
You round the corner in the maze of the trailers after a phone call you had with Jeff when you run out of luck and bump right into Florence.
“I’ve been looking for you, Y/N. Come have lunch with me in my trailer,” she smiles sweetly, grabbing you by your hand so you can’t escape her this time.
“Oh I wanted to call—“
“Do it later,” she simply cuts you off.
Soon, you find yourself in her trailer as she eats her burger while she eyes you with suspicion.
“So, you and Harry sleep together?”
“Well, not like that. We really just sleep in the same bed.”
“Oh, makes perfect sense, sleeping in the same bed as your boss. Very casual.”
“Don’t make it sound so weird,” you frown at her words. You definitely don’t see Harry as your boss. You do work for him, but it never felt like he stands anywhere above you, the two of you have always been equal even before you became close friends.
“You gotta admit it’s pretty unusual,” she points out and you just look away from her. “So let’s talk about how you’re in love with him.”
“What? I never said that!” you protest, but she just gives you a look that says ‘cut the crap, girl’ and you know there’s no use to try to trick her, she sees right through you. “Don’t fucking look at me like that, I have enough shit on my plate without your judgment.”
“Oh, I’m not judging you. I’m just wondering why you two are not together already.”
You practically snort at her statement, finding it quite absurd and ridiculous.
“What? You two are perfect for each other and I’m pretty sure Harry loves you too.”
“Yeah, as a friend.”
“That’s not how friends act, Y/N. He wouldn’t beg himself into your bed every night if he was just your friend.”
“He is just lonely. He doesn’t need me, just someone to be with him.”
“That’s bullshit,” she scoffs. “You two are just being idiots.” Just as you are about to answer, your phone starts ringing. Harry’s smiley face appears on the screen, making you extremely nervous because of the conversation you are having with Florence.
“Hey,” you breathe out answering the call.
“Hey, where are you?”
“Just, talking with Florence. What’s up?”
“I got an email from Jeff and I have some questions.”
“I’ll be there in a sec.”
“Thank you Angel,” he hums before ending the call.
“I gotta go. Please don’t… bring any of this up for Harry,” you ask Florence, heading to the exit.
“You’ve gotta sort your shit out. This is not ideal, Y/N.”
“I know it,” you growl under your breath, leaving the trailer. You chew on your bottom lip nervously as you march back to Harry’s trailer. You feel so confused and anxious about this whole situation and the worst thing is that you have no idea what to do about it. Telling him how you feel seems like a stupid idea, but mostly because you’re terrified of rejection. What if it all meant nothing to him? If you were right and he is just lonely and uses you to help himself, it has nothing to do with you. You wouldn’t survive the heartbreak it would give you if he told you he doesn’t see you more than just a friend.
As you walk into his trailer he is sitting on the sofa with his phone in his hands. He glances up at you, a warm smile tugging on his lips as you take a deep breath, feeling very much out of place suddenly. Unfortunately, he immediately senses your discomfort.
“Everything alright, Angel?”
Angel. This nickname could make your knees go weak in a heartbeat and you hate how much effect it has on you. Especially in this state of mind you’re currently in.
“I just…” You shake your head shutting your eyes. “Why do you keep calling me that?” you ask, sounding way more desperate than you intended to. Harry puts his phone aside, looking a little puzzled at your sudden weird act, but he seems more worried for you.
“I, uhh—“
“And don’t tell me it’s because Hey Angel is about me. We didn’t know each other back then.”
You have no idea where this is coming from or why you even questioned him about it all of a sudden, but Florence just totally threw you off with what she just said. Harry stares back at you, probably vigorously looking for the reason why you are acting up now, but luckily, he doesn’t try to turn it into a joke as always.
“I call you Angel, because you remind me of the song. It wasn’t written about you, but the lyrics match up with… you.”
“What?” you ask in confusion.
“I wish I could be more like you, do you wish you could be more like me?” he quotes the song, not singing the words, simply just talking them as he stares back at you. “I see you at the bar, at the edge of my bed, backseat of my car, in the back of my head,” he continues and you feel your throat doing dry just from the way he softly speaks, standing only a few feet away from you. “I come alive when I hear your voice, it’s a beautiful sound, it’s a beautiful noise.”
You never really gave it another thought, but now that he has told you this, it hit you hard in the chest. You weren’t expecting, especially because those lines are rather meaningful, to you at least.
“I thought of it once not long after we first met and thought calling you Angel would suit you. Do you mind it? I can just… stop calling you that if you don’t like it.”
You shake your head. You never want him to stop calling you that even if it’s not that meaningful for him. If it’s just some game. It’s great to know that something reminded him of you.
“No, it’s… it’s alright.” Your voice is small, barely more than just a whisper. It’s a little too much at once. Florence’s words are still stuck in your head, and what he just said has felt like he just gripped your heart even if he doesn’t know.
You take a shaky breath, forcing yourself to come back from this hazy state of mind.
“So, what about that email?”
“You alright?” Reaching forward he takes your hand and you try not to flinch at his touch, just smile at him nodding.
“Yeah. I’m fine.” He squeezes your hand before dropping it and he luckily doesn’t ask any more questions.
 You stay oddly quiet for the rest of the day and Harry surely knows something is wrong, but he respects you enough not to bug you about it any longer. He just stays close to you as much as he can, trying his best to take your mind off of whatever keeps you occupied.
On the way home you and Harry drop by a supermarket, buy some quick dinner, not wanting to stack the fridge when you’re leaving so soon. Then you sit in the living room, eating and watching some random movie that’s on TV. You snuggle to his side on the couch naturally, he doesn’t even have to pull you close this time. The thought of having left only one more night in the apartment makes you want to sue every little moment you have left in this bubble.
Harry makes you have a shower first tonight and when you come out from the bathroom, your bed is already nicely made, inviting you warmly. He is quick to finish with his shower and joins you in bed barely five minutes later. You move towards each other instantly, his arms curling around your form soothingly as you make yourself comfortable, melted into his embrace. You feel his lips pressing against your forehead and you almost start crying at the small action.
“Angel, I don’t know what has upset you, but I’m here for you, alright? You’re not alone,” he murmurs softly.
“I know,” you whisper. “Thank you.”
“No need to thank me. I would do anything for you, just like you do so much for me. You’ve got me.”
I wish, you think to yourself. You have him, but not the way you’ve been desiring. His hand moves to cup your face as he lifts your head so you are looking into his eyes in the darkened room, but there’s enough light coming through the window that you see his features. He runs his thumb across your cheek, gently caressing your skin and everywhere he touches you, it feels like your body is in flames. This something has been building up inside you and now you’re not sure how long you’ll be able to control yourself. And just as you think about how you really should put some distance between the two of you so you won’t regret it later, the unexpected happens.
Harry pulls you up just enough so when he moves his head he is able to place his lips on yours, kissing you out of the blue. His lips feel so soft, so fitting on your mouth, you let out a whimper when he goes further than just a gentle kiss, taking your bottom lip between his properly. It’s an out of world experience, you’ve imagined it so many times, but you never thought it would actually happen and now that it is very much happening, your whole mind goes blank and for a split second… everything feels right. You kiss him back with fever and with each passing moment the kiss grows more passionate and way hungrier than how it started. Harry’s arm tightens around you, almost pulling you on top of him and you can’t make yourself stop, not that you want to.
With a little force, Harry pushes the two of you around so now you’re lying on the mattress and he holds himself up above you, his lips never disconnecting from yours. He licks into your mouth, pulling and tugging on your lips, making your whole body go weak just for him.
But then, as if reality hit you in the head, you realize what’s happening.
“Harry,” you gasp pulling back, gasping for air. “This—We…”
“Angel, let me take care of you. Please,” he begs out of breath.
“What…”
“I want to make you feel good. I want to take care of you, please let me.” He sounds so desperate, like he would do anything for this and you are not strong enough to deny it from him.
It’s just his pity. He’s been using you for his needs, now he wants to give some back, it’s nothing more, you think to yourself. It can’t be more.
You lack the willpower to make a rational decision, so as you stare up into his eyes that appear so dark due to the lack of proper lighting, you just nod before he leans down and kisses you again.
He holds himself up on one arm while his free hand wanders down your body, touching you at places you have never felt him before. He palms your left breast, squeezing it gently and it makes you moan into his mouth before his hand moves down the curve of your waist until it reaches your sleeping shorts. Your body is burning for him and you can’t stop it from reacting to everything he does. You buckle your hips up when you feel his fingers gently graze along your pubic bone, even though you’re still fully clothed.
“What do you want me to do, Angel? I’ll do anything you want me to,” he pants between kisses as his hand moves to cup your heated core, making you moan again from the sensation of his touch there.
“I need you,” is all you manage to get out.
“I’m right here. You got me. What do you want me to do? Please, tell me, Angel,” he whines, forehead pressed against yours and his hips fall, pressing against your thigh, making you realize how excited he has gotten. His erection is hard under the fabric of his boxers, almost aching to be freed. There’s no way you can take any teasing or a long foreplay. You need him inside you now before you burst.
“Harry, I need you inside me. Please,” you whimper, almost cry, before he kisses you again, hard and demanding as he simply pushes your shorts down, revealing your naked sex since you don’t wear any underwear to bed. You grab the waistband of his boxers too and push it down until he can wiggle his legs out of them, leaving him completely naked in your bed while you still have a top covering your upper body, however he is quick to change that. He grabs the hem and starts pulling it off, your hands helping him so a few moments later you’re completely naked underneath him.
“Fuck, Angel,” he breathes out, his perfect, pink lips attacking the side of your throat, kissing and nibbling on the skin, going down to your breasts, giving the same amount of attention to both while you turn into jelly under his touch. lacing your fingers through his hair you cry out his name as you can feel him leaving a mark on your left breast, his tongue swirling against the spot he just completely destroyed before he brings himself back up so he can kiss you again and again with so much hunger, it’s hard to tell where you end and where he starts. Everything melts together and you’re such a mess in every possible way.
His hand gently reaches down between your legs and parts your shaking thighs before he cups you drenched pussy, his middle finger sliding between your folds, a shameless moan slipping from your mouth, right into his as your lips are still attached.
“So wet, I can’t wait to make you feel good, baby. Let me make you feel good.”
“Harry, just… please,” you pant, surely feeling yourself lose the last bits of your nerves.
“D’you have a condom?” he asks, head lifting up a bit so he can look into your eyes.
“I-In my, um, the makeup bag,” you try to explain gesturing towards your dresser where your makeup bag sits on top, two condoms somewhere inside it. Harry pecks your lips before pulling away from you, the lack of his weight on top of you making you shiver.
He digs into the bag until he finds what he’s been looking for, tearing the packaging open with his teeth and he rolls it on while he walks back, not wasting another moment. You cling onto him like a koala bear once he is back in bed, his massive body covering you again.
“Just tell me how you like it, I’ll do anything,” he mumbles against your shivering lips as he pushes the head in first, stopping for a second before the rest of his cock buries inside you, completely taking your breath away. He is bigger than anyone you’ve ever been with, filling up every inch of you, your walls stretching around him as he stills once he is all the way inside you.
This is it. This is the moment you’ve imagined oh so many times, feeling him the closest possible, his cock buried inside you, his cheek pressed against yours as he holds himself up on top of you. Years of yearning and endless nights when you imagined your hand was his… and now it’s your reality. And though you know it’s gonna change everything, you can’t tell yourself to stop.
Harry lifts his head, pecking your lips gently, calling you Angel over and over again as he starts moving, the friction between your legs growing with each thrust. He fits inside you so well, you won’t be able to enjoy sex with anyone else now that you’ve experienced it with Harry. All of a sudden, he has become the epitome of your whole life.
“Tell me what you want, Angel. Do you want me to go slow or fast? Tell me how to make you feel good.” His lips brush against yours with each word while you’re just trying to catch your breath, fingers digging into his back, the euphoria building up inside you gradually.
“A little faster,” you breathe out, speaking feels like a hard task at the moment. Harry picks his pace up, finding just the right rhythm that makes you wrap your legs around his waist so he can go even deeper with each thrust he makes.
“Look at me, Angel. Let me see your eyes,” he begs, his hand cupping your cheek. He runs his thumb along the line of your lower lip before he takes it between his lips, tugging on it gently, kissing you like you’re his last breath on Earth. He is devouring you, body melts together with yours, all your senses are strictly focused on him. He is all you see, hear, feel and taste.
Your gaze meets his and the way he looks at you, like you’re his whole entire world, it makes your eyes tear up. You want it to be true, you want it to be reality, you want it to be more than just about needs and satisfaction, but it’s not and your consciousness is not letting you believe otherwise.
“Oh Angel,” he softly hums, wiping away a tear that escaped the corner of your eye and ran down the side of your face. Keeping up his rhythm he kisses along your jawline, your cheek, your lips, the side of your face, the bridge of your nose, everywhere he can before returning to your lips with a hungry, passion filled kiss.
“Harry…” you whimper, holding your thighs tighter around his waist as you feel yourself nearing the edge.
“Let it go for me, Angel. I wanna see you feel good, cum for me,” he tells you, eyes never leaving yours as you are ready to burst underneath him.
“Harry, I-I need you!” The words fall from your lips as a desperate beg, arms wrapping around his torso tight, as if he could disappear from your embrace any moment.
“I’m right here, Angel. Right here,” he soothes you, kissing your lips sweetly as proof that he is not just a trick your mind is playing on you. “Are you close, baby? Are you gonna cum for me?”
“Yes! Yes!” you pant, losing control over your body and all your senses. It’s gonna be intense, you can tell and it hasn’t even started yet, you just know it’ll shake you to the core.
“Good girl. Let me make you feel good.” “So good,” you breathe out before Harry occupies your lips with his once again.
It doesn’t take long. He keeps thrusting in the perfect angle and it throws you right over the edge. Harry demands you look him in the eyes when your orgasm wash you over and the intensity of it all almost makes you cry again. You burst, lose yourself under him, screaming his name as if you were praying to all higher forces. In a way, you are, because for a moment you really think you completely vanish from this world.
Harry follows you just a few more thrusts later, falling out of his rhythm as he grunts and moans your name, face buried into the crook of your neck while you tug on his hair, the feeling of his soft locks between your fingers is like pure heaven.
He stills, but stays inside you as he looks up, his eyes filled with satisfaction and contentment as he cups your face again, kissing you long, taking his time with you.
As you come off your high and the clouds of euphoria clears off, reality sets in more painfully than ever. Your limbs are paralyzed and you feel like you are outside your own body, just watching everything happen as if you were a third person in the room. Harry rolls to the side, chest heaving wildly as he is trying to regulate himself. Once he is able to breathe without panting, he pecks your shoulder gently and makes a quick round to the bathroom. You hear water running and then his feet padding on the floor, but you can’t bring yourself to move, you just lie there, completely drained out. It doesn’t change even when Harry gently cleans you off with a damp washing cloth, throwing it to the side to take care of it in the morning. He pulls the covers over the two of you and scoops you into his arms. You manage to bring your arm up to his chest as your head rests on his shoulder. His fingers are dancing up and down your arm, his steady breathing keeping your overcrowded head grounded. And then… he starts singing so softly, it’s almost just a whisper.
“Hey Angel, oh, I wish I could be more like you. Do you wish you could be more like me?”
Your eyes shut close, the damn tears flooding again, but you keep your sobs drowned in your throat. Instead you force yourself to sleep and hope you live to see the morning, because you feel like your heart is about to give up on you.
 When you wake up, you genuinely feel like you’ve drunk through last night and now have the worst hangover. It’s like you’ve been hit on the head with a chair. You slowly come to your senses and realize that you’re completely naked in bed and there’s a body curled to your side, equally naked.
The shock sets in first because you realize, once again, that what happened last night wasn’t just a fever dream, it actually happened. And then you basically jump out of bed when you look at the small digital clock on the bedside and see that the two of you have ten minutes to leave if you don’t want to be late to the last day of filming.
“Harry! Harry get up!” you smack him, kicking the covers off and grabbing your top and shorts from the floor, quickly putting them on. The man in talk growls, just rolling to his back without even opening his eyes. “Harry damn it! We have ten minutes or you’ll be late!” you snap at him and it somewhat wakes him up. With furrowed eyebrows at puckered lips, he lifts his head up and looks around.
Those lips were kissing you last night.
“What?” he mumbles in confusion.
“We overslept, get up. We have… eight minutes left.”
“Shit,” he mumbles under his breath, finally getting out of bed, reaching for his boxers.
It’s a shitshow as the two of you try to get ready on time and though you are running just a few minutes late, the driver of the taxi manages to speed down the streets fast enough that you arrive to set just in time.
During the whole ride, you feel Harry’s burning eyes on you, but thank God, you get a call from Jeffrey the moment you get into the car and it lasts the whole ride so you don’t have to talk with him about what happened last night.
“Y/N,” he tries when you’re still on the phone and he is already done with hair and makeup, heading to set to start filming.
“What?” you mouth at him.
“Can we talk later?”
“I’m busy. Go, I’m sure they are waiting for you,” you whisper to him and he looks so disappointed, but he nods and walks away. Your heart breaks as you lower the phone. You have been out of the call for some time, just didn’t want to talk to him.
Quite frankly, you’re not ready to talk to him about what happened last night. You don’t want to hear him say that he was just trying to help you out last night, that it wasn’t anything serious, just some messing around. It was just two people trying not to feel lonely.
Walking back into his trailer you can feel your chest tightening, a sharp pain shooting right into your heart the more you think about him. It was a mistake, you shouldn’t have done it because you are the one with the feelings and now you are the one struggling with the consequences of your little get together.
The more you think about it, the worse it gets and you feel like you’re about to suffocate. You need to get out of here, there’s no way you can face him now.
It all happens so fast. Before you can even second guess your decision, you’re on your way back to the apartment to pack all your stuff and get on the first flight back home. You need to put distance between you and him, spending one more night in the same apartment would make you go nuts. So while Harry is filming, completely oblivious to what you’re doing, you pack up your room as fast as possible and head to the airport to hop on the plane that leaves at four pm.
With a racing heart you check all your baggage in and make it through security when Harry first calls you. At first, you want to ignore it, but then you find yourself swiping your thumb across the screen.
“Hey,” you shortly greet him.
“Hey, where are you? Have been looking for you everywhere.” “I um… I’m at the airport,” you answer and the silence on the other end is deafening for a moment.
“You are at the what?” he then snaps.
“I had a, um, kind of emergency, so I’m heading back home now. Sorry, I would have called you, but didn’t know when you’d be off set.”
“You fucking packed and left already? You’re really at the airport?” He is fuming, Raging. You can tell he is pacing in the trailer, vigorously running his fingers through his hair, ruining it without a care. You almost feel guilty, but then again, you just know facing him now would break you. You’ll get back to him when you’ve pulled your shit together.
“I am, calm down, alright? Not a big deal.” “You just left on our last day here without a fucking word! And when am I seeing you again?”
“I, uhh—I need to be home for a while, but you’ll be fine. I’ll stay in touch with you in email and text.”
“Fucking text? Email?” he is barking now. Good thing you are not there because it would be a disaster. “Y/N, you can’t be serious. We-we were supposed to talk. You can’t just fucking disappear like this.”
“We’ll talk, alright?”
“When?”
“Later,” you simply tell him at a loss for a better answer. Hopefully, never, you think to yourself, but don’t say it out loud.
“Okay, you’re not doing this. Don’t you dare get on a plane, I’m going to the airport right now. You’re not leaving.”
“Well, I am and you’re not coming here,” you clap back, but you can already hear him moving around, probably gathering his stuff so he can leave right away.
“Swear to God if you get on that plane, I’m—“ He cuts himself off, no idea what to really say and you just sigh, closing your eyes. People rush by you and as you glance at the big screen you see that your plane is boarding.
“Harry, just… it’ll be better like this, alright? You’ll be fine, I’ll see you… when I see you. Have fun on your last day on set.”
You end the call before he could get another word out and put it on airplane mode right away as you grab your backpack and head to your gate.
Using your time on the plane wisely, you put together a very detailed schedule for Harry so he knows everything about his next few weeks and you can minimize your contact with him. You even set up a bunch of reminders in his calendar so he won’t miss his appointments.
When you set feet on the ground again, you expect the distance between you and Harry to feel comforting and freeing, but it’s the opposite. An ache in your chest is getting heavier as you get yourself a taxi and head home, feeling more alone than ever in your life.
Your home doesn’t feel like a home. Not without that one person who could make any place your home, but you can’t see him right now, not until you learn how to exist around him without the urge to faint.
Going to bed alone is pure torture. Every moment you are waiting to hear Harry shuffling around in the apartment, you miss his little snorts when he is watching the TV, his singing coming from the shower, but most importantly, you miss having him so close to you in bed. Now that you’re lying on your own, your bed feels so cold, it brings you tears as reality sets in. You miss him. You miss him more than anything and you can’t imagine a time when it won’t hurt anymore.
The crying pushes you into a shallow slumber sometime in the middle of the night, however, you’re rudely shaken back to consciousness when you hear someone banging on your door like crazy, pushing the doorbell constantly.
“Jesus fuck,” you mumble with a grimace, pulling a hoodie on as you make your way to the door hazily, probably still half asleep because you open the door without checking who it is through the peephole and you end up staring up at none other than Harry. “What the—What are you doing here?” you breathe out, panic sets in fast and your hands start shaking at the sight of him.
Harry steps inside without invitation and closes the door behind him, a stern expression on his handsome face.
“Y/N, what the fuck were you thinking when you left like that?”
“I-I told you, it was an emergency.”
“What kind of emergency? Because I called your mom and sisters, they all said nothing happened in the family, so what could possibly happen that needed you here immediately?”
“I don’t have to explain shit to you.” Shaking your head you try to step back to put some distance between the two of you, but he doesn’t let you, taking a step forward at the same time.
“Well I think we have a lot to talk about after last night, don’t you think?”
“I don’t want to talk,” you shake your head biting into your bottom lip. This wasn’t supposed to happen, why couldn’t he just stay where he was? “How did you even get here so fast?”
“Left as soon as we wrapped.”
“Where are all your stuff?”
“Left everything there, I’ll just go back and pack it up, it doesn’t matter. What matters is that for a girl who genuinely hates any form of working out, you ran pretty fast from you today.”
Any other day you would have laughed at his comparison, but not today. You just stand there, chewing on the inside of your cheeks as you try to figure out what to do or say. You were not ready to face him so soon.
“What do you want me to say?” you ask desperately, throwing your hands into the air.
“Tell me what it meant for you,” he calmly answers and you want to shake him. How is he so peaceful?
“No,” you shake your head. “I’m not doing this to myself, okay? I need time, Harry.”
“For what?”
“So I can get myself over this, alright? I need time, I—fuck this,” you growl, feeling the tears flooding your eyes again. Damn it!
“Why the fuck do you want to get yourself over it?”
“Because it obviously didn’t mean the same thing to me as it meant to you!” you snap at him and he raises his eyebrows at you in a way that tells you “you’re stupid”.
“What do you think it meant to me?”
“Probably nothing,” you scoff rolling your eyes, but the anger that bursts from him quickly washes your attitude away.
“Fucking nothing? You think I would get on a fucking plane first thing after filming for ten hours straight just to come after you? You think I spent all my nights with you these past weeks because you mean nothing to me? You know, for a smart girl, you can be pretty dumb sometimes.”
You blink at him in utter confusion, his words knocked you off your feet. He exhales sharply, long fingers running through his messy curls as he tries his best to calm himself down. When he is finally breathing somewhat normally his wildly vibrant green eyes meet your widened stare.
“Y/N, I thought we were on the same page. What did you think it was all about?” he softly asks, seeing how shook you still are.
“I, uhh—I thought this was all just some kind of distraction. You said you were feeling lonely, I thought you were just… kind of using me. And then last night was you returning the favor.”
“Hell no,” he breathes out shaking his head as he steps closer and this time you don’t back away from him. You let his hands run down your arms until they find your hands. “I thought this was clear, but I’m gonna say it then. I’m in love with you, Y/N, have been for a long time, I was just being a pussy and didn’t know how you’d take it. But then, when you didn’t kick me out of your bed the first night we slept together, it got me hoping and it was all heading just the right direction. Then last night happened and I was so damn sure this would be our turning point but then…” He breathes out shakily again, as if the thought still upsets him. “When I called you and you said you were at the airport… I love you, Angel, but I was ready to murder you.”
You let out a faint chuckle, feeling the tears bubbling in your eyes.
“Why did you run away instead of talking to me? Did you not trust me?” he asks softly, a hand coming up to cup your jaw gently.
“I didn’t trust myself,” you admit weakly.
“Oh Angel…” Leaning down he kisses your forehead tenderly, his lips feel like soft feathers against your hot skin. “Do you need me to tell you again how in love I am with you or are you gonna believe me? You’re not planning to run away again, are you?” he teases you making you chuckle as you shake your head.
“I’m not gonna run away, but I would love to hear you say you love me again.”
“I love you. I love you so fucking much, Angel, don’t you ever think otherwise for a moment, okay?”
You nod, lips curling into your mouth as your teary eyes meet his green orbs.
“I love you too, Harry.”
“You have no idea how long I’ve been waiting to hear you say that,” he chuckles breathing out in relief and it makes you smile. “I would never just use you. Love you way too much for that, Angel. You are everything to me.”
“Wish I knew that earlier,” you mumble with a bitter chuckle. It would have saved you a lot of tears.
“I will never stop saying it to you.” His forehead rests against yours, noses touching as his arms curl around your frame, pulling you close to him until you’re pressed up against his hard chest. “Just out of curiosity, what were you thinking when I told you, you reminded me of Hey Angel? Because I think it pretty much gave me away, but apparently, I was wrong,” he chuckles lowly, pulling back a little so he can look you in the eyes.
“I honestly have no idea,” you admit with an awkward chuckle. “I just had a conversation with Florence before that where she called me out about my feelings for you and I was still kind of in shock. Probably took it as just your usual flirty behavior.”
“I’ll admit I do flirt some, but haven’t you realized it’s different with you?”
“I guess not.” “Angel, you are… something else,” he chuckles in disbelief before leaning down he finally presses his lips against yours. You giggle into his lips, arms wrapping around his neck as he lifts you up from the ground, twirling you around, a squeal slipping from your mouth.
“So, now you have to go back to pack your stuff?” you question, still wrapped into his arms completely and you don’t want to exist any other way. This is where you belong.
“Yeah. Had to chase down this Angel who thought she could run away from me.”
“So how are you planning to get to New York by four tomorrow when you’re still here and have to go back to pack? Have you checked the schedule I sent you? You’re not gonna make it.” You cock your head to the side with an arched brow.
“Did you just go back to full assistant mode right after we confessed our love for each other?”
“Someone has to be responsible and we both know it’s always me.”
“I’ll just hire someone to do it for me, I’ll leave to New York from here. Happy?” he grins at you as you nod.
“Very. Because this means you can stay the night here.”
“Seeing the fact that I literally have nowhere else to go, because even my house keys are in the suitcase I left back… I very much need to stay here for the night,” he points out.
“Good. Come on, my bed felt empty without you,” you giggle, pulling him towards your bedroom and he follows you eagerly.
“I can definitely help that.”
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1kook · 4 years ago
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— jjk x (f) reader
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summary; But for Jungkook to initiate some sexting, nevertheless sexting at 1pm on a Saturday, when you were at work and you were almost positive he was supposed to be on stream right now? Unheard of, you had to mark this down somewhere. warnings; sexting, dick pics, dirty talk?, phone sex, vivid depictions of jungkook being just so sexy bc its true, rating; mature (18+) misc; mentions of youtuber kook 🥰, he’s just horny, stupid selfie trends (see here), he’s a little whiny but so hot v.v  wc; 4.6k 
notes; I've had this in my drafts since april 😐 n then i was like maybe we should actually finish this so i started n then last night i hit another follower milestone!!! so then i rlly forced myself to finish this bc i was so 🥺🖤👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩 anyway enjoy lmk what u think its not proofread bc uhhhhh yeah 🤩
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You’re at work when it happens.
It’s sometime between your usual listless thoughts of what to write for your weekly reflection papers for some course, and your trip to your store’s pharmacy to bother a coworker. Your phone vibrates in the pocket of your work apron. You’re normally pretty good at ignoring the sound, most of the times it’s just a classmate asking for help on homework or Jimin lamenting his love life, so you’ve grown used to ignoring the tiny vibrations, stocking a quarter shelf of different cooking oils before something in your brain tells you to check your phone.
You already know it’s not something grave, but that thought alone means nothing at the sight of the tiny jungkook♡ that appears at the very top of the list of notifications. Your boyfriend’s texts tended to be wildcards, never following a certain routine or alluding to any specifics. He could send you a long paragraph on how much he misses the scent of that one shampoo, the one you’d briefly run through last year because your usual brand was out of stock, with a ten point explanation on why you should switch back to it. Or two word, caveman sentences that drove you crazy because you never understood what exactly he wanted when he’d send those nondescript “munchies dip” texts.
You unlock your phone, clicking to the messenger app instead of directly on the notification. Hopefully the preview will give some warning on whether you should invest in this conversation or not. You hated the read receipts on messages, choosing to ghost conversations as you pleased, but Jungkook had wiggled his way into your phone one afternoon and specifically turned them on for his chat with you, and you’d never turned them off since. So he knows if you choose to ignore Attachment: 1 Image at 1:43pm exactly, and he'll pester you about it until you respond.
You contemplate it all for twenty seconds. It could be a variety of things, you guess, but the only way to find out is to actually see with your own eyes what he’s up to this time. He knows better than to distract you at work, is usually really good at waiting until your shift is over to spam you with messages. For him to send you something now, only a few hours into your shift, is uncharacteristic of him.
But you glance down the aisle anyway, taking note of some elderly woman you’d helped a few minutes prior and another teenager aimlessly walking around, probably looking for the snack aisle. You inhale and press down on your chat with Jungkook.
It takes you a moment to make out exactly what the image is, twisting and turning your phone around as you fight to see it without raising the brightness. It’s only when your eyes finally adjust to the dark screen, the faint beeping of the check-out registers fading into the distance, that you realize it’s a shot of the front of his sweatpants.
“Hm?” you murmur, getting brave enough to pinch the image between two fingers, zooming in until you’re able to decipher a multitude of details. For one, there’s a Flaming Hot Cheeto stain on the hem of his sweatpants, the same one you’d accidentally put on there a few weeks back and haven’t been able to wash out since. Then there’s that huge palm of his, tattoos and all, rested carefully against his thigh. It’s veiny and thick in all the right places, bringing all the attention to his knuckles, which you guess is what he was going for when you consider the centerpiece of the image—his hardened dick straining against the grey material.
There’s no text attached to the message, no snapchat font slapped over the image, so you wonder what exactly he wanted you to do with this information mid-shift. Well, realistically, you know exactly what he wants, but that doesn’t mean you won’t clown him before getting there. After all, Jungkook was seldom the naughty texter; sexting annoyed him, he would whine, because he would do all that and not even get to feel the true pleasure of sex, of being inside you. You’ve dabbled in it here and there, but it never went as perfectly as it did in pornos. He’d drop his phone and forget it, or you would straight up ignore the damn device as you went all in on yourself.
But for Jungkook to initiate some sexting, nevertheless sexting at 1pm on a Saturday, when you were at work and you were almost positive he was supposed to be on stream right now? Unheard of, you had to mark this down somewhere.
you what’s this about?
You decide to play it safe, because as exciting as the image of Jungkook at his computer chair, cock hard and angry at the thought of you, fluffy hair ruffled in that way you adored, jaw twitching and tightening as he touched himself, moaned deep and rough and just how you liked and—
As nice as that image was, for all you knew this vague message was Jungkook sending you a picture from a week ago to purposefully fuck with you at work.
jungkook♡ what time u get off? jungkook♡ miss you bad baby
Your stomach flips, and it takes everything in you to not squeal and bounce between the shelves like a toddler on a sugar rush. Here was your boyfriend, the cutest, sweetest boy, sending you dirty pictures of himself and telling you how much he needed you. Yes, YOU, not some random on the street, or someone else in a club, Jungkook needed pleasure and that pleasure could only come from you.
You glance back down the aisle again, checking your surroundings for the second time that day. You’ve been standing here, stock cart empty for a little over five minutes now, so it’s probably best to change location lest your manager come barking down your neck. You send one quick text before heading off for stock again.
you 4pm :(
Your phone dings again just as you’re leaving the stockroom, but you decide to check it once you get to the hygiene aisle you need to work on next. Still, the prospect of Jungkook having texted you has you walking with a skip in your step, one your coworker teases you about when you pass by her.
jungkook♡ fuck jungkook♡ tell me what panties youre wearing jungkook♡ please ?
You bite your lip, stopping yourself from smiling at the tone you’d picked up from his message. There was no doubt he’d been riled up for a while now, and you wonder if he sat through his usual Saturday morning streams with his cock hard, pushed against the edge of his desk like you knew he did when such things happened. The thought has you nearly fumbling with a bottle of aloe vera.
you seamless black thong you the one you bought me at the last vs sale
Briefly, you wonder if you should have lied and told him you were wearing that red lace set he’d given you last Valentine’s Day, the one he’d bought with his first big YouTube check. But the beauty of being in a relationship with someone like Jungkook is that you could have told him you were wearing grandma undies and he’d still think you were the most beautiful person to grace the planet.
jungkook♡ mm jungkook♡ tiny ones u ruined last time?
You set your phone down, speed stock a row of sunscreen like you’re on some shelf stocking national competition, before daring to text Jungkook again. Your cheeks are still warm, and your hand tightens dangerously around a bottle of shaving cream.
Before you can formulate some response, he’s sending another one in.
jungkook♡ u soaked those jungkook♡ came fast that day jungkook♡ want u so bad
Your cheeks burn, a little embarrassed that he remembers such details. As with all Victoria’s Secret panties, they were, like Jungkook said, extremely thin. You pause, shift your stance just barely, but you’re definitely wet. Not terribly so, but with this fabric, you’d start to notice it sooner than with others.
you mm you makin me wet bunny
It’s not a complete lie, but knowing Jungkook this is exactly what he needs to hear to get that competitive streak going. You shake your head to clear your thoughts, stocking another section of men’s shaving cream. It takes longer for him to message you back, and you wonder if he got off fine on his own. If it’s over now, at least he provided you with some distraction midway into your shift.
When he texts you again, you’ve almost completely convinced yourself he’s finished, so the Attachment: 1 Video that appears on your lock screen throws you for a loop.
It’s a short clip, no longer than ten seconds, but it has you scrambling to lower the volume on your device as some unsuspecting mother of two wanders past. You flash her your practiced smile, the same one you give all the store’s customers. Not like your boyfriend is jacking it off on your phone, shallow pants filtering out from the speakers.
You turn your phone over carefully after she leaves, try to at least pretend you’re still doing your job as you play the video again.
Sweats are gone, but boxers remain. Legs deliciously exposed, thick thighs with muscles that ripple when he moves. Shirt pulled up just slightly to showcase that broad expanse of tummy, cute belly button and defined abs that tighten with each glide of his palm over the outline of his cock. Your mouth fills with drool at the sight. He was so hot.
Your brain hasn’t even processed it yet, all your energy directed towards your clenched pussy, when he shoots another text.
jungkook♡ im so fckin hard jungkook♡ wanna kiss yuo every where baby jungkook♡ come ove r soon ??
Shutting your eyes and counting to ten doesn’t help ward off the sudden wave of horniness that consumes you, but it does remind you of the job you’re supposed to be doing now. You shake your head, as if the image of Jungkook’s dick throbbing beneath his boxers, low voice in your ear, will magically disappear. It doesn’t, and it plagues you even more when you begin stocking a section of sunscreen, numbly instructing yourself on what to do next. Shaving cream, sunscreen, lotion next, you repeat.
It doesn’t help.
Two minutes later and you’re scrambling for the phone you’d hastily tucked into your apron pocket, tapping your passcode in until your messages with Jungkook are pulled up again.
you after work you promise
Your head is absolutely spinning, the coil in your stomach too tight for you to try and be a functioning member of society. Something in you says to sneak off to the bathroom and call him, but your boss is a little bit of a prick when he wants to be, thinks you take too many bathroom breaks as is.
Speak of the devil and he shall appear. A curt call of your name has you whirling to face your shelves again, phone tightly pressed against your ribs like maybe it’ll melt into your skin and he won’t see it. At the same time, your sudden fright has you scrambling to turn it off, fingers sloppily pressing against the buttons, hitting the volume like seven times before you eventually feel the familiar click that signals it’s off.
Your boss disappears shortly after, and with his sudden appearance having made every hair on your body stand, you find yourself now slumping against your stock cart. Jesus, that man was a handful to deal with.
The paranoia sticks for a little bit, has you stocking shelf after shelf like a robot until you finish the entire row of hygiene products, back stiff from bending over so much. It’s only when you return to the stockroom ten minutes later that you dare take your phone out again.
A pleasant surprise awaits.
It would appear that during your haste to hide your phone from your boss— Jungkook’s scandalous messages and all —your frantic hands had done something else. A fuzzy picture on your end, a blurry display of lotion bottles you had stacked just before your boss’s impromptu appearance, with no words to accompany them. Normally Jungkook would have ignored that; you frequently sent accidental messages like this, butt texted him, he says.
But there’s something about Jungkook’s horny brain that makes him do stupid things, makes him blow up your phone with a series of question marks, call you four times, whine and fuss in your message thread, and eventually, send you probably the oddest image to date.
jungkook♡ ??? jungkook♡ ????what is that jungkook♡ baby please jungkook♡ I don’t get it ??
jungkook♡ Missed Call (4)
jungkook♡ baby jungkook♡ what does it mean jungkook♡ please ur drivign me insane jungkook♡ jsut wanna hear yuor voice jungkook♡ fuck please just
And then, there’s another one of those cursed Attachment: 1 Image messages.
You shouldn’t be as surprised as you are. You’ve been dating Jungkook for a few months now, know he had that sort of unique personality most college dropouts turned YouTubers do. But every now and then the absurdity of his actions makes you question him still, makes you wonder what exactly goes on in that pretty head of his to warrant such ideas, makes him balance a bottle of body lotion on the thick outline of his cock like this.
Unlike the first few images, this one was taken in front of a mirror. The blinding fluorescent light in his bathroom paints him in a stark color, has every inch of his pretty face on display for you. Rosy cheeks, dewy skin. Perfectly swollen cock straining beneath his grey boxers, curved up against his hip. Shirt pulled up, finally freeing that expanse of muscles on his abdomen, cute little belly button on display once again. The red material is pulled up to his mouth, pearly white teeth biting down on the fabric, and he’s got this flushed expression on his face.
But the real star of the show isn’t his chiseled abdomen or sexy expression, but the sheer hardness of his dick that lets him balance a bottle of body lotion over it, like a fuckin’ shelf or something. He’s so hard, dick so full beneath his boxers. So big too, the little boxers pulled taught around said engorged cock and thick thighs.
Your brain says to laugh, to tease him for being such a clown even when he’s horny as hell. He won’t take it to heart, will probably laugh along with you and you’ll add it to your still growing list of funny memories.
But your caveman libido says call him, so that’s what you do, ducking down behind a new shipment pallet with a squeak as the phone rings. It only lasts four seconds before he picks up, voice breathy and low, but it sounds so loud in the silence of the stockroom.
He doesn’t even let you get a greeting in. “You like my picture, baby?” he husks. It sounds like he’s right there, right beside you, speaking into your ear. Your pussy throbs at the way he sounds. Paired with the picture from before, it has your body tingling all over.
“What the fuck is that?” you hiss, trying to not let the sudden overflow of arousal leak into your words. Jungkook chuckles.
“What?” he huffs. There’s the brief sound of shuffling, the scratchy noise of his phone presumably being pressed against his shoulder. “I’m so hard, baby,” he sighs before you can pretend to reprimand him any further. “Fuck— you, can you just talk to me?” he groans, and the disgusting sound of him spitting into his palm fills your ear.
Your face feels warm, eyes nervously peering across the stockroom like your boss will suddenly appear now of all times to rip you from this important phone call. The anxiety and arousal mix weirdly, have your leg bouncing but every new movement sends a shock up your aching cunt to your chest, and then out to the tips of your fingers.
“You shouldn’t be doing that when I’m at work,” you murmur hurriedly, moving to nervously bite at your finger. Jungkook moans softly.
“Uh huh,” he says.
The air conditioning turns on and you nearly jump out of your own skin. “Kook,” you stress, frazzled by your own burning arousal and the fear of being caught. Like you said. Weird mix. “I— not when I can’t respond.”
He shudders on the line. “You’re responding now,” he points out. You hate when he’s right. Before you can defend yourself, define what a proper response is in this scenario, he’s beating you to the punch. “Baby,” he whimpers, voice so airy yet low, makes your eyes roll into the back of your head, back unconsciously arching. “Couldn’t stop— fuck.”
Your mouth feels dry, all and any form of lecturing fading from your thoughts as you become consumed in Jungkook’s little whines and whimpers. He talks smoothly, a modern day Casanova, and it’s certainly because of that cult-like harem he’s gathered on YouTube. Teenage girls who kiss his ass, tell him he’s cute and dreamy. Make his ego so big.
But then he gets horny and can barely contain that lisp you tease him about, shivers and melts when you put his cock in your mouth. “Couldn't what, bunny?” you mumble, voice drawn tight because now you were really horny, and it was all his fault.
The nickname makes him mewl prettily, your speaker suddenly going scratchy as he fumbles with his phone. “C- Couldn't stop thinking about you— your mouth,” he admits, and now you’re certain he’d sat through that Saturday morning stream like this. “T- Tits,” he adds, lisp slipping through. “Fuck.”
You bite your lip, eyes fluttering shut as you remind yourself now was not the time or place to get yourself off. But, well. That didn’t mean you couldn’t get him off. “Sat through your stream like this?” you murmur, circling your kneecap with a trembling finger as if it’ll ward away the raging lust in your abdomen. Jungkook confirms with a breathy moan. “Had all your little fans wondering why you ended so early.”
He groans. “No,” he chokes, voice hot from how much it wavers. “They— I lied,” he confesses out of nowhere, “s- said I had a doctor’s appointment.”
You muffle a giggle into your palm. “Naughty,” you tease. “Too hard to do your job.”
“Just,” he cuts off, voice feathery. He sounds so close and you haven’t even said anything of substantial value yet. “Tell me,” he says quietly, “what to— mmh, what to do.”
A smirk consumes your features. You try to hide it, but there’s no one here anyway so you’re left grinning at an unpacked box of dental floss like a madwoman. “Why?” you inquire playfully, bask in the sad little whimper he responds with. “Shouldn’t you know how to make yourself cum?”
Another groan of frustration, desperation seeping into his tone when he speaks again. “Baby, please,” he begs, and it feels good. Feels nice to have this big YouTuber begging for you like this, whimpering your name like his doesn’t appear on the top 25 most viewed. “Like when you— ah — when you tell me… what to do.”
Your body feels hot, thighs pressing together with each whimper that falls from his lips. “Okay,” you concede, and he audibly moans in relief. “Tip first,” you instruct softly, eyes defocusing as your brain slowly starts to manifest the image of Jungkook spread out on his bed. Thick thighs, grey boxers pulled taught around them, fat cock between his pretty hands, inked knuckles squeezing around his member. You swallow. You can tell exactly when Jungkook does as you say because another muffled moan fills the speaker. “One finger,” you remind him quickly, head spinning from the mere memory of his dick. “Run it… run it over the slit, bunny.”
“Nngh—“ Jungkook sputters. You can only imagine the face he’s making now, the bottom lip he’s bitten raw by now. He does it a lot; it’s a nervous habit. But as sexy as it looks when you’re in bed, you know he has sensitive lips because of it, bleeds easily if he’s too harsh. You have half the mind to remind him about it now, but then he’s hurriedly gasping out for more. “And, and then? Wha— what then, baby?”
He sounds so sweet, melodic voice dripping with honey. “Touch your balls,” you say a little breathlessly. “Don’t squeeze,” you add, “just roll your palm over them.” Your palm squeezes against your thigh, as if it’s remembering the feel of his body, the soft skin between his thighs when you’re down there. He gets so jittery, thick thighs nearly crushing you if you drag him along too much. “O- Other hand on your cock,” you stumble, thighs squeezed together. “Stroke yourself just like I do, bunny.”
Jungkook complies. “Just like you?” he mumbles, suddenly sounds farther away. As if he’s dropped his phone off to the side. “Fffuck,” he grunts, “m- mouth is so pretty.”
“Hm?” you inquire, so consumed with tampering down your growing arousal for a second that you miss his sentence.
Jungkook’s breath stutters, and for a moment you’re met with the wet squelch of his cock in his hand. And then, “pretty mouth… make me— make me wanna see you cry.”
You bite your lip. “Why,” you say tentatively, finally caving in with a hand fluttering over the front seam of your jeans. Not a question, more of a gentle nudge for him to spill his thoughts.
“Be- Because,” he cries, fucking into his hand. He sounds closer and closer. You have to wonder just how long he had been riled up. It’s been a while since his first message, he was probably desperate by now. “Y- You’re so nice,” he cries, and the sentiment, though oddly out of place, makes your heart squeeze with adoration for the boy on the line. “Wanna be,” he groans, “wanna be so fucking mean to you, baby.”
The sudden change of tone makes you choke on a moan, hand pressing against your mound like it’ll somehow penetrate the thick material of your jeans and give you the sensations you crave. As it stands, it’s a muted feeling you get instead. When your hands fail, his voice compensates. “Fffuck, don’t you— don’t you think about it too?”
Admittedly, no.
Jungkook had always been a gentleman in bed. Always cared for your needs before his own, went out of his way to make you feel pampered and adored during your most vulnerable moments. Contrary to what his online persona might say, he was a good boy. Sweetest boy you knew, touched you like you were made of glass.
So to suddenly learn of this dream— fantasy? kink? —of his that you would certainly enjoy equally as much, well. It made you whimper into your palm, eyes worriedly flickering toward the stockroom’s entrance.
“Why?” you whisper, feeling like a broken doll repeating the same phrase over and over again. You’re suddenly aware of how hot everything was. Your polo felt sticky against your spine, apron too tight, jeans too stuffy. How long had you been hiding in here for? You don’t even know. Hopefully your absence on the floor had gone unnoticed.
Jungkook pants into the line; everything sounds so sticky and wet on his end, hand undoubtedly working away at his cock. “Shit,” he curses, doesn’t really answer your question until you prod a second time. “I- I like it,” he stammers. “When you… fuck, when you look small.” He elaborates before you can even ask, breath heavy and drawn out. He was so close. “When your mouth… when it hurts,” he says, thoughts a scrambled mess. “Like when you— when you cry because my cock is— it’s too big for you.”
A blatant ego boost you’ll ignore for now. Not like you can focus on too many things right now anyway. “Your cock is big, bunny,” you agree softly instead. Your legs feel cramped from crouching so long, so you push yourself to your feet. Except then you’re made aware of how fucking wet you are, panties soaked from the phone call with your boyfriend. You shift and they stick to your folds, make you release a shaky exhale that Jungkook doesn’t miss.
“I— you’re wet,” he says boldly, and this time your meek confirmation isn’t a lie. Jungkook grunts. “Fuck, baby, I—“ cut off by his own whiny cry, probably bucking into his hand like a madman by now. “Wanna, wanna kiss you everywhere,” he says, a call back to his earlier message. Your legs feel like jello. You want him to kiss you everywhere too— lips, tits, cunt that is dripping for him now.
“I- I’ll be over soon,” you stammer, feeling like you’ll pass out if he carries on any further. He sounds so good on the line, soft pants, rough growls. You can’t possibly listen anymore, not when you’re so wet and horny in the middle of your shift. “Just,” you pause, can’t get the image of his pretty cock out of your mind. Every blink makes it more vivid, reminds you of the vein on the underside, the exact shade of the tip.
“What?” Jungkook hisses, voice higher than usual, parts of it lost under the rapid movements of his hand. “Tell me, baby, tell me what to do,” he begs hoarsely, “I’ll do it.” Sounds so desperate and needy, two seconds away from busting all over his hand.
You have to lean against the wall of the stockroom to ground yourself, remind yourself you’re not in the same situation as Jungkook and can’t cum in your pants like a teenager. “J- Just cum,” you choke, eyes fluttering shut.
He must’ve been waiting for that command, because the second the words leave your throat he’s filling the line with breathy groans and cries as he comes all over himself, probably ruins his t-shirt. The sounds have your hips unconsciously bucking forward into nothingness, the frustration of not being able to cum with him manifesting in the form of a tiny little sob. Luckily, he doesn’t catch it.
When it’s all said and done, he’s left panting into the receiver, flooding your speaker with breathy sighs that only make you more and more aroused.
“You’re terrible,” you frown, cheeks flushed, body tingling. You flip your wrist over and check the time; it’s been about sixteen minutes since you disappeared from outside. Sixteen minutes of listening to Jungkook touch himself and moan and whine and whimper. Tease you with new possibilities you had never considered before. And now he’s satisfied and you’re not.
Jungkook chuckles, low and tired. The sound shoots straight to your cunt. “Come over after you shift,” he says, as if you’re not planning to fake a severe case of the flu right now in order to get off early and run to his bed. You only had a little less than two hours of your shift left anyway. Not like they paid you well to begin with. Jungkook shifts, releases one of those saccharine groans as he probably snuggles into his bed, all sweaty and worn out. “Want you to fuck my face, baby.”
You frown, counting to ten to calm yourself down. Another few minutes of listless conversation, and you hang up. Your body feels featherlight, a little woozy as you make your way back out into the floor.
Nothing has changed. Customers pour in and out, your boss scolds you for a display you didn’t do, and life inside the store drags on. No one knows that you’re soaking your panties to hell and back, Jungkook’s soothing moans in your ear. Life goes on.
you shift ends in 20
jungkook♡ sweet jungkook♡ got your seat ready jungkook♡ Attachment: 1 Image
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Copyright © 2020, 1kook on tumblr. absolutely NO reposts allowed.
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jakesimfromstatefarm · 4 years ago
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not jealous | jake sim
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summary: jake sim is not a jealous person. at least that's what he tells himself. so why does he find himself going through your phone when a certain "bluejay park" decides to text you?
pairing: jake sim x y/n [ft. mentions of jay park]
genre: angst, fluff 
warnings: angst, cursing (very minimal), one slightly suggestive sentence, jake being cute, some more angst lol, slightly cheesy bc jake’s just too cute ugh
wc: 3.8k
a/n: ok i loved writing this, which is why i went on to almost 4k words LOL oops. but anyways, i love jake a little too much and this type of scenario has been running around in my head for a while now so i decided to put it into words. also i may have created this blog just so i could post this somewhere LMAO anyways yeah this was my first fic so hope you guys enjoyyyy <3
Jake Sim is not a jealous person.
At least that's what he tells himself. To be fair, in his past relationships, he never showed any jealously. Then again, he doesn't know if he can call those relationships, "relationships". Does a fifth grade relationship with a girl who he was once dared to kiss during a game of Truth or Dare in the basement of a classmate's house during their 11th birthday party count? He doesn't remember being jealous when the same girl was later dared to kiss his classmate, Sunghoon. (Funny enough, that's how the two boys came to be best friends 'til this day, but that's a story for another time.) 
But really, Jake doesn't think jealously is one of his traits, even if he's now almost 20 years old without any experience with love other than his current relationship with you and that short-lived romance in the fifth grade. (What was her name again? Jake would have to ask Sunghoon later.)
So he doesn't know what clicked in that brain of his that lead him to this current situation he was in. He doesn't know why he felt a little spark of anger in him when your phone, which you left right next to him on the couch while you went to take a shower, kept buzzing with texts from "bluejay park". He doesn't know why he couldn't kept his eyes distracted from the messages, although your phone was constantly lighting up because whatever it was Jay had to say to you, he would not shut up about it. He doesn't know why he questioned what your relationship with Jay was for a split second.
In fact, you're close with all of Jake's friends. That's one of his favorite things about you, you get along so well with all his friends you might as well replace Jake himself in the friend group. So he doesn't know what tells him to take a little glance at your phone—at the messages.
But he finds himself doing it anyways.
Hearing that the water in the shower was still running (you were always the type to take long showers), he quickly grabs your phone and scrolls through the lock screen just to find that he couldn't even read the messages since you had your notifications set so no one could read them unless the phone was unlocked (darn you and your settings!) Thankfully, Jake knew your passcode––and you knew his too––or he thought he did. Until the iPhone vibrated, telling him the passcode was wrong.
He must've entered it too fast or something. So he tries again.
And again.
And again.
Until the iPhone switches its screen to say: "iPhone is disabled. Try again in 5 minutes."
There's no way. You never change your password. And even if you did, you would tell him—you two even had each other's fingerprints saved into each other's phones in the past (you know, before the world decided that Apple's home button was too lame and decided to just completely get rid of it). If there was an option to save multiple faces for Face ID, you two would be that couple that saved each others faces in your own phones.
That being said, Jake sat there, your phone in hand, frozen. Why was your phone locked? Why was Jay texting you 10 texts per second? Why did he feel guilty about this entire situation?
He hears the shower switch off and in that moment, he swears he feels his heart beat just a little faster. He tells himself there's no way you'll be out before the 5 minutes are up. You followed a really meticulous skincare routine (one that Jake memorized by now) that took an extra 15 minutes of your time after each shower.
"Hey Jake?" Your voice calls out from the tiny bathroom door crack that you left open before you hopped in the shower, "Is my phone out there? Do you mind bringing it to me?"
Fuck.
Jake shifts on the couch. Taps his foot on the ground. Returns your phone to its original spot. Clears his throat.
"Don't you want to get dressed first?" he calls back, quite timidly.
He can hear you stop moving around in the bathroom. Probably telling yourself what an odd response that was. To be fair, it was an odd question, considering the fact that you two have been together for so long, it’s not like he hasn’t seen you undressed before...intentionally or not. 
Next thing he knows, the steam is rolling out of the bathroom door and you're stepping out in your towel, eyebrows raised.
"If you didn't want to get up from the couch, you could've just said so, you lazy butt," you smirk at him as you walk towards him and the couch, leaving a faint trail of water drops behind you. Jake's eyes follow your figure as you go to grab your phone and lift the screen towards yourself.
That's when he freezes. You do too.
You cock your head, as if asking yourself why it was disabled. He can hear the gears in your head turning.
"Jake, did you try to unlock my phone?"
He runs through all the possible excuses he could blurt out. Come on Jake, think of something! But he knows he can't lie to you.
Too many beats of silence pass by.
"Maybe," he finally says—or more like murmurs. He looks up to you like a child looking up at their mom, who just them caught stealing a cookie from the cookie jar. To his surprise, you don't show any hint of anger. A flash of confusion—and is that worry he sees?—crosses your face for a split second before you shrug and turn towards your room to change, dropping the subject. It was natural for you two to use each other's phones anyways. So then why did you have that look of worry?
Jake knows you well, a little too well. But that's what you love about him. He can easily read all your emotions. One of the many things he picked up from dating you for almost two years now. But why would you care if he tried to get into your phone? Why would that worry you? All the possibilities run through head and his own worry begins to increase. He trusts you. He does.
So then why does the thought bother him throughout the entire day? Why does he bring it up during dinner later that night, when you're both cuddled on your sofa, slurping take-out ramen while rewatching your favorite k-drama under the thick blanket that you always keep in your living room for nights like these?
"Huh? Of course I've heard from Jay today, we had that conversation about that stupid meme you boys kept laughing about in the groupchat we're all in, didn't we?" You answer him when he asks if you've heard from Jay lately. You sit up from your warm spot under Jake's arm to put your empty bowl on the coffee table in front of you. When you lean back, you look up at him,
"Why do you ask?"
"Oh, it's nothing, just wondering," he says, avoiding your eyes by keeping his own trained on the series currently playing on your TV. This would be your third time rewatching this series together. He would never complain to you though, he knows how much you love it and if he were being honest, he was secretly attached to the characters—not that he would ever tell you, he would never hear the end of it from you and the boys.
"You're being weird. Just tell me, or did you forget that I can practically read your mind," you say with a giggle and shove to his side, the one you were currently warmly cuddled into. Jake wasn't the only one who learned how to read emotions; you could read him just as well as he could read you. And like you, that's one of the many things he loved about you. But maybe not in this case.
He toyed around with the contents inside his ramen bowl with his chopsticks.
"I just..." God, how does he word this? Why was he having trouble explaining it? You were the easiest person to talk to. To him, you were the only person he could tell everything to.
"Jaywastextingyouabunchearlier," he blurts out quickly, but not quickly enough for you to miss it.
He feels you shift under his arm. He feels the air in the room shift. Tension.
"What?" Now you're sitting upright, legs criss-crossed in front of you on the couch but turned, so your body is completely facing him. He mirrors you, sitting up to put his ramen bowl next to yours on the surface, but he stays facing the TV.
"Your phone kept going off because of him when you were showering," he says with a little more confidence. But inside, he was nervous as hell, the same nervous as when he asked you out for the first time many moons ago. But it's too late to back out now, he brought it up first, anyways. Guess we're having this conversation now, good going Jake!
"Is that why you tried unlocking my phone earlier? I mean I thought you were just trying to leave selfies on my phone like you always do but you were trying to read my texts?" You question, slightly raising your soft voice. He doesn't know how to react, he hates confrontation.
"It wasn't like that, Jay just kept spamming you and like I—why was he even texting you in the first place? Then your phone got disabled because you changed your password, which you never do by the way, so I–"
"I changed it because my little sister kept getting into my phone when I went to visit my family yesterday! Did you really think I was hiding something from you? You know I can text whoever I want, right? You don't own me."
Okay so now he's managed to make you angry. Good going Jake, part 2!
"Okay but what does Jay need from you so bad that he has to send you like 50 messages at once?" He's standing now. So are you, eyebrows furrowed together as you collect your bowls from the table.
Standing there, bowls in hand, you say, "Jake, that's none of your business! It wasn't even that big of a deal, I don't know why you felt the need to nosy around."
"Well, if he's texting you non-stop, then obviously it's a big deal! We wouldn't even be having this conversation if you would just tell me what you guys were talking about," he murmurs back, eyes narrowing. You scoff as you trail into your kitchen. He follows behind and stops at the other side at your kitchen island as you place the dirty dishes into the sink.
"No, we're having this conversation because you obviously don't trust me! It doesn't matter what we were talking about, it doesn't matter who I was texting! I could be texting your mother and I shouldn't have to tell you what we were talking about! That's why we're having this conversation," you say as you turn back to face him from the other end.
He hates this. He hates fighting with you (which is a very, very rare occasion). He hates that you think he doesn't trust you. He hates his insecurity eating at him, telling him to keep questioning you on why you and Jay were talking in the first place. He was aware that you were close with his friends, but it wasn't until the texts he realized just how close you are with them. It's not that he didn't trust you, he just didn't know how to act when it came to you and other guys. God knows how he got lucky enough to meet you, let alone date you, so the thought of him losing you to someone else actually terrified him. Not only were you his first real relationship, but he wanted you to be his first and only one in life. You were it for him.
"Why did he text you." He deadpans from his side of the kitchen.
You scoff with a hint of exasperation. "You're kidding me."
You stare at him. He stares back, quirking an eyebrow, as if restating the same question back, as if testing you.
You're fuming now. Why was he making it so hard? Why was he doubting you? Out of frustration, you start laughing, which scares him. That can't be good.
"Fine. You wanna know so bad? Take a look,"  you're one tone level away from screaming as you take your phone out of your pocket, unlock it, and open up your conversation with "bluejay park", sliding the phone across the island to reach him.
Jake stares at the phone which now lies there, unlocked, facing him. Isn't this what he wanted? It is, right? That's why he started this dreaded argument with you in the first place.
Then why does he feel so fucking awful?
He looks back up at you, to see you sighing and looking up at the ceiling, as if trying to force your forming tears back into your eyes.
Yup, he feels horrible.
"Happy? Happy to know we were just trying to plan a surprise birthday party for you but you and your jealously just had to know huh, Jake?" You quickly state, voice cracking, as you tried not to choke up. You weren't sad that he found out about the surprise. You were sad that it felt like he didn't trust you. That he thought you were the type of person to do god knows what behind his back. You hated the feeling of not being trusted. Especially by Jake, of all people.
"Fuck."
Jake's face (and heart) falls with the most broken expression you've ever seen. But you're too sad, angry, tired (a mix of all?) to care. Your only goal right now is to not let him see you cry.
You hurry past him, across your apartment, and into your bedroom, slamming the door behind you, leaving behind a shocked, and regretful, Jake.
His heart shrinks when he hears the door slam shut and a little more when he looks down at the still unlocked phone in front of him. He didn't have the heart in him to look at it anymore. Of course he trusted you, he knew what you said was the truth.
He mentally screams at himself for assuming the worst––for thinking that you, a literal angel, would betray him.  First, he thought he was losing you to someone else. Now, he was afraid he just lost you through his own actions. 
He hesitantly sulks over to your door, softly knocking when he reaches it.
"Y/N?"
No response.
"Y/N, I'm so sorry. I didn't know, I let my—”
"Jake just please leave me alone for now," he hears you painfully say from a distance, meaning you're on your bed. He knows the door's unlocked—the lock on your door hasn't been working for a long time now, despite the many times he tells you to talk to your landlord about it. But he doesn't find it in him to open it. He knows he messed up. If he saw you in there right now, crying, he wouldn't know what to do. He wouldn't know what he would to do himself, knowing he was the reason behind your tears.
He nods in silence, knowing you can't see him, but does so anyways and returns to his spot on the couch. He could leave right now, go back to the dorm with the rest of the guys, let you have your space like you wanted. But his heart hurts at the idea of leaving you sad, angry, or a combination of both. He can't leave this unresolved. He fucked up, he has to fix it.
And so he sits on your couch for another hour. The clock on the wall behind him continues to tick as the silent tension in your apartment continues to grow. When it hits 11pm and he's sure you've slumbered off into sleep, he quietly enters your room.
He can see your figure in the dark, your back facing the door as you're curled up into yourself under the comforter. He feels his heart drop a little more when he imagines you crying in that position from earlier. He slowly peels the comforter open and gets into his side of the bed, careful not to bother your sleeping figure.
Laying there, staring up at the ceiling, he's never felt more like a stranger in your bed. It's not that he hasn't slept over before, god knows he's probably slept over at your place more than he has in his own bed. But right now, in this moment, he just felt awful. Like he didn't deserve to be in such close proximity to you. How could he be deserving? He violated your privacy, made you feel like you weren't trusted, doubted your relationship.
These thoughts run through Jake's head as he stares up at your ceiling fan, wishing he could turn back time to a few hours ago, before he checked your phone, before he let his insecurities get to the best of him.
You can feel the dip he makes in the bed behind you when he gets in. Of course you're not asleep. There's no way sleep could reach you when you had the recent events constantly replaying in your head like a broken record.
You knew Jake with all your heart. You didn't have to look at him to know he was probably laying there, hurt, staring up at the ceiling, drafting what to say once you wake up—or once he knows you're actually still awake.
You decide to break the tension by turning to lay on your other side, facing him.
You were wrong. Thanks to the little sliver of moonlight shining through your sheer curtains, you can see him, now laying on his side, already looking at you with so much regret in his eyes. You can almost hear the cracks in your heart physically forming.
His eyes widen when he realizes you're still awake. He opens his mouth to say something, but not before you quickly shift over to his side of the bed and embrace him in a tight hold, burying your face into his chest. Without any hesitation, he returns the gesture, arms holding your body as close to him as possible. As if once he let go, he'd lose you forever.
He lets out a sigh of relief as he breathes you in. He didn't even know he was holding his breath all this time.
"I'm so sorry. I'm so, so sorry Y/N," he mutters into your hair. He feels his hoodie getting wet from where you buried your face. He pulls you closer, if that's even possible, feeling his own eyes heating up with sadness. He would never forgive himself for making you feel this way.
"You know I trust you right? Please know that. I shouldn't have assumed the worst when I saw your phone. I...I let my insecurities get to the best of me."
You move your head from its home on his chest to look up at him, as if asking him to elaborate. This was new to you, you didn't know he held insecurities in your relationship. But it wasn't because of you, no, you were his entire world. Losing you meant losing everything.
Jake's never been the best at saying his feelings. That's why it took him so long (with the help of his six best friends) to finally confess how he felt about you. He was afraid of letting people in if they could easily walk out. Maybe that's why he never let anyone into his life before you. But oh, were you an exception. The second he met you, he knew he was fucked. But thank god he did, because thanks to you, he's been able to be more open, more vulnerable. He's able to talk to you about anything and everything. He doesn't have that same fear of losing people anymore, not when he has you in his life to reassure him every step of the way. But right now, in this moment, he doesn't know how to tell you that his new fear was, in fact, just losing you.
The sheer idea of you not being a part of his life anymore terrified him. 
"I hope you know you're never going to lose me Jake, if that's what you're insecure about," you softly mutter as you wrap your free arm that's not stuck in between both your bodies around him to gently play with the ends of his hair. It's as if you could read his mind, he loves that you know him so well.
"It just sucks that you could even think I would ever do something as awful as what you were assuming...with one of your closest friends nonetheless," you continue.
"I know. I know, and I feel terrible. I'm so sorry. I know you would never do anything remotely close to that, and I know you would never intentionally try to keep anything from me," he sighs. He shifts so he can lie down on his back, bringing you with him to lie on his chest, never letting you go once. "It's just...I just don't know what I'd do if I ever lost you Y/N. Everyday, I ask myself what heroic thing I must've done in my past life to deserve this life with you and I can't help but think you could just as easily be stripped away from me."
As much as your heart breaks listening to him rant, you feel your love for him grow even more. You knew how hard it was for him to put his true emotions into words, and him telling you this reminded you how much trust he had in you.
After some moments of silence, moments of him drawing random shapes onto your back, moments of you two just holding each other like it was the end of the world, you speak up.
"I love you. I'm sorry for making you doubt yourself—"
"No, it's not your fault, I can't help but think things like that. I just don't know what I did to deserve you, and I know that I need to be mo–"
"Babe let me finish," you say with a little giggle in your tone. He immediately stops and mutters a little "sorry". How cute, you tell yourself.
"I was gonna say," you look back up at him so you're making direct eye contact now. "You're the only one that's ever on my mind, Jake. I can't help the way you think, but I can assure you that there is no one else I would rather be with. And I mean that for the rest of life."
You snuggle back into the comfortable hoodie he's currently wearing (you make a mental note to yourself to steal it from him later) and decide to ease the tension,
"So you're stuck with me for life, sorry to inform you Mr. Sim."
Jake lets out a laugh, looking down at you to see you returning his smile with a cheeky one.
"I love you. So much," he says so sincerely, so genuinely, that you almost tear up again from how content you were. Now you were asking yourself, what did you do to deserve him?
Jake Sim is not a jealous person.
No, he just loves you.
A lot.
3K notes · View notes
sleeping-on-cracking-ice · 4 years ago
Note
Hello, my request is for Niragi ✨ Y/N was popular in high school and always protect him when he was bully. When they saw each other in Bordeland, she saw how much he changed and keep her distance from him (which he hates), and she have an attitude that make one of the militants wants to attack her but Niragi protect her like she did with him bc he would never admit her but she's his only weakness
Yessss I’ve actually been wanting to write something for Niragi that sounds very similar so I’m glad you requested this! Thanks so much! 💕
You’re Everything You Once Hated | Suguru Niragi
PART 1 | PART 2
{Alice In Borderland Masterlist}
Character(s): Niragi (ft. The guys that bullied Niragi, Ann, Hatter, OC’s)
Summary: You and Niragi were best friends in high school. When you arrive in the Borderlands, you notice he’s not the person he used to be, causing you to avoid him. But unfortunately, he’s not happy about it.
Warnings: swearing, bullying, smoking, drinking, violence, threatening, bullet wounds, implications of sexual assault
Word Count: 7.1k
*reader is female
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Niragi gif credit
4 Years Earlier…
The young boy grunted out in pain, having been hit with another rock right between his eyes. This one managed to crack his glasses, making his vision go all distorted.
His classmates around him roared with laughter. His heart filled with both anger and sorrow, wanting nothing more than to dissolve into the wind and out of his current situation.
“Aww, little Niragi has become quiet. Where’s those sarcastic remarks from earlier, they seemed to have left you,” his attacker mocked, adding a mean tone to his voice.
Just the usual. ‘Maybe they might end their target practice with me earlier today,’ he hoped.
He had grown used to it. He now expected to be dragged under the bridge each day on his way home from high school, being pushed around and roughed up. It’s not like he could’ve defended himself anyway. It was six guys against one, he never had a chance.
A short jab to the back of his neck broke him out of his thoughts. He groaned and doubled over, feeling as he was going to throw up. “Come on Niragi, fight back! It’s no fun when you just stand there,” the blonde student complained, striding over to the weakened boy. He gave him a quick kick to his side, making him fall on his hip harshly.
“Fuck off,” Niragi groaned under his breath, half hoping his tormentor didn’t hear it. But unfortunately, the small remark reached his ears.
“What was that? Did you just try to defend yourself? You’re going to have to use a lot more than just a few words you fucking loner,” the boy poked, giving Niragi another harsh kick to his stomach, making him become winded and choke on air.
He laid there taking their harsh words and hearing their mocking laughter ring in his ears. What did he ever do to deserve that?
“Hey Haru!”
The blonde turned his attention from his target to the direction of the voice that called his name. There you stood, by yourself with no one else. You obviously didn’t think the situation through before throwing yourself into it. You remained near the stairs that led down to below the bridge, holding something behind your back, but Haru seemed to not notice it.
Your heart skipped a beat when the group of high school boys all locked eyes with you, confused about what you were doing interrupting them.
“The fuck do you want Y/N?” the blonde, Haru, asked you in an annoyed tone.
You gulped before answering him, trying to sound as threatening as you could without your voice cracking. “Let him go! He’s done nothing to you, why are you giving him a hard time?” you spat at him, taking a few brave steps closer to the scene in front of you.
Niragi slightly lifted himself off the ground to look over at you. He recognized you from his social studies class. You both sat together at the back, and he always thought you were too nice for your own good.
Niragi sat up and shook his head, trying to warn you to stop what you were doing. He didn’t want to drag you into his own problems. He would’ve felt awful if you happened to get hurt while trying to help him.
Haru rolled his eyes and groaned at you. “Why are you getting involved? This is none of your business,” he retorted, walking closer to you with the baseball bat in hand. You watched with fearful eyes as he swung the bat around, obviously to threaten you.
Your heart quickened and you felt it pound against your ribcage dramatically. As Haru got closer and closer, you stood your ground bravely, still holding your hand behind your back to hide your weapon from him. You weren’t stupid enough to get yourself involved without having some kind of way to defend yourself.
“Well? Are you going to answer me or just stand and shake like the pathetic girl you are?” Haru tormented, a confident smirk growing across his face.
His comment made your blood boil. “Do you have a saviour complex or something? Why did you think you could help this son of a bitch?” he pressed, gesturing towards Niragi who was slowly rising to his feet with a worried expression on his face.
That was it. He was getting far too close to you for your own liking, so you decided that comment was the final straw. You rushed towards him and pulled out the large can of pepper spray from behind your back, aiming directly at his smug face.
He cried out in pain the moment the spray hit his eyes, dropping the baseball bat and covering his face with his hands. He tried desperately to rub the stinging liquid out of his eye with his school blazer sleeves, but it wasn’t worth the effort as it only made it worse.
You moved quickly and picked up the bat that he dropped, running past him towards the other boys that were still gathered around Niragi. They all held shocked expressions on their faces.
“You want some too?” you bluntly asked, thrusting the pepper spray towards them. They all flinched and stumbled to get away. You smiled, feeling empowered.
Haru and the others ran, thinking that beating up Niragi wasn’t worth being blinded for.
You turned towards the bloodied boy standing against the wall looking at you in shock. You glanced at him, giving him a friendly smile. He returned it.
After that, you two became inseparable for the rest of your high school days, spending every waking moment together. With your tough attitude and Niragi’s shy demeanour, you were a strange friendship to have been made. You thought you would always stay together, until one day Niragi went missing.
You never guessed where he may have ended up, until you were sent there yourself a few years later.
*************
You breathed in a huge gulp of oxygen as the black bag was harshly pulled off your head. You tried to wiggle your hands to shield your eyes from the blinding sunlight seeping through the windows but struggled as you saw that your hands were tied to the armrests on either side of you. You groaned in frustration.
As the curtains closed so you could see probably, you saw a young woman with short black hair dressed in blue shorts and a white button up that was tied at the waist. “Sorry,” she began. “I forgot to close that before removing the bag.”
You looked around at your surroundings. You noticed that there were several more people in the room. The room was large, stretching down further until it came to a stop at the end where a large wall stood, conveying a huge spray painting across it that consisted of every card from a deck of cards. Some were crossed out, while a few number cards and all face cards remained untouched.
You whipped your head around, feeling restless from the number of eyes staring at you. You don’t remember how you got into this situation. All you remember is walking to a large light in the distance from your position on a bridge, being curious as to how it seemed to be the only building with electricity. Before you knew it, someone had grabbed you by the shoulders and shoved something over your head, making your vision go black and suddenly passing out.
You moaned in pain as you felt the back of your head throbbed, probably from when they punched you to knock you out.
“What’s going on?” you asked, struggling in your restraints more, trying to break free. An older man with glasses scolded you. “Stay still, Hatter will be here soon.”
Just as he promised, two large doors on your left burst open, revealing a man with a long decorative robe and dark glasses on. He had two other men beside him, both holding revolver guns.
“Ah! A newcomer!” he exclaimed excitedly, taking a big sip from his drink.
You froze, watching as he strides into the room further, making himself comfortable on a table in the centre of the room.
“A few of my militants tell me they found you sneaking around nearby The Beach,” he accused, pointing his finger at you.
You stared at him; confusion written all over your face. Militants? The Beach? What was he talking about?
After you didn’t answer him for a moment, he let out a big sigh and jumped off the table onto his feet, beginning to talk himself.
He explained the current situation to you. About how the dynamic at The Beach worked, and that considering the number of high-level cards you had on your person, you seemed to be the perfect candidate to add to the ranks of everyone there.
“And remember, death to the traitors,” he said, spite filling his tone. He had listed off the three main rules to you, each one adding more dread for you.
“Okay, all good. But I just want to say. If you want people to help you collect cards, kidnapping them isn’t the best idea. If it hasn’t hit you yet, that would make people want to help you less,” you smartly said, trying to stop your lips pulling up into a smirk.
All the heads in the room turned to Hatter. No one has ever questioned his motives to his face before, especially a newcomer.
Except, he didn’t get angry like everyone expected. Instead, he chuckled and held his drink out towards you. “Cheers to that, I guess. Have fun!”
************
The Beach was a lot more crowded than you expected. Your eyes almost popped out of your head when you walked down to the bottom floor to the pool. People were everywhere; dancing, swimming, drinking, talking, smoking. It honestly couldn’t have been more chaotic than it already was.
You spent most of the remainder of the day becoming familiar with the layout of the hotel. You found the room that you had been assigned to. You managed to score a room that was a little above average. Hatter decided to give you the benefit of the doubt and gift you a higher number due to your high number cards. He thought it was only fair.
You were sitting at a table nearby the bar. The sun had gone down but the party continued on through the chilly night air. You shivered, not being used to being dressed in a bathing suit twenty-four seven. You were annoyed that you weren’t even allowed to wear some sweatpants to bring you some kind of warmth. You guessed you would just have to grow used to feeling the cold on your skin.
The warm beverage slipped down your throat, bringing you at least a little bit of comfort. You had made yourself a coffee inside, not in the mood for alcohol just yet. You honestly didn’t like drinking without having anyone you trusted around you, just in case something was to happen.
You looked around the area, taking in everyone’s faces to see if anyone appeared friendly enough to be nice to you. You needed to make some allies before the next game, otherwise you would be the first they would sacrifice.
As you scanned the crowd, your gaze landed on a particular male, who was sitting in a more done up booth nearby the pool. He was wearing a black and white checkered shirt with black skinny jeans. He had several piercings in his face, making him seem more threatening.
You squinted your eyes. Why did he look so familiar? You swore you’ve seen him before.
You kept your gaze locked on him, watching as he communicated with the people sitting near him. You noticed that a huge sniper rifle was tucked behind him. He must have been a high-ranking militant, being able to carry a weapon like that around.
He suddenly flung his head back and let out a roar of laughter at something the guy next to him had said. You froze in your spot.
You could recognize that laugh anywhere. That loud, obnoxious laugh that used to come from your old friend Niragi from high school. Your best friend that randomly disappeared.
You blinked a few times before looking back at him. His facial features did match and the way he smiled seemed way too familiar to not be him.
How could he be here? Is this where he disappeared to a couple of years ago?
Your heart filled with joy and a wide grinned grew on your face. That had to be Niragi! Who else would it be?
You quickly stood to your feet, almost tripping on your chair in the process and began making your way towards his position.
Although, as you did so, another man approached him from behind, leaning over the seat and tapping his shoulder. Niragi turned with an angered scowl on his face, but it turned to a smirk once he heard what the man had to tell him.
You stopped in your tracks and watched as he leaped over the backrest of the couch suddenly, following the man with his rifle slung over his shoulders. They were headed to the door that led inside, so you quickly followed, wanting to reunite with your old friend from so long ago.
“Niragi!” you yelled out happily, trying to get his attention. A few heads turned at your voice around you, but he didn’t manage to hear you over the sound of the music blaring through the speakers.
“Niragi!” you tried again, but this time you were blocked by a few people in your way. A small crowd gathered in front of you, not noticing you trying to get past.
Niragi turned his head at the mention of his name but couldn’t see anyone calling his attention. He shrugged it off and kept following the man. He had told him that a young guy was causing some trouble inside one of the halls, so he was going to take care of it.
As you finally managed to force yourself through the small crowd that interrupted your path, you saw the Niragi and the man had already made it inside. You ran straight after them. You were feeling ecstatic, ready to throw your arms around him and give him the biggest hug ever to make up for all the days you’ve been apart.
As you quickly made your way inside, you caught a glance of his checkered shirt turning the corner a bit ahead of you. You moved your legs as quick as you could, trying to catch up.
You turned the corner, about to yell out to him again, but your voice got caught in your throat when the sight in front of you met your eyes.
“You really thought you could get away with this?!”
Niragi had a young boy pinned to the ground, pressing his boot against his upper back and shoving the barrel of his rifle against his skull violently. The boy below him was crying and begging for his mercy.
You had a small flashback to high school, when you saw Niragi’s main bully Haru shoving a baseball bat against the back of his head, him lying on the ground battered and bloodied.
It was the exact same scene. Only this time, Niragi was the tormentor himself.
“Niragi, I’m sorry! It won’t happen again!” he cried desperately, clawing at the floor trying to get away.
Niragi lifted his other boot and stamped it down roughly onto the boy’s hand. You covered your mouth as you heard a few bones crack.
He leaned down closer to the boy’s face and lifted his head up his hair, making him whimper in pain. “If I ever see you stealing from one of the executives again, this rifle will go down your throat and I won’t hesitate to blow the back of your skull out,” he hissed, sticking out his tongue and revealing the ball piercing he had.
The boy nodded, leaning away from Niragi as best as he could.
The man who led Niragi to the scene tapped him on the shoulder. “Alright that’s enough. You don’t want to give him PTSD,” he said calmly.
Niragi let out an annoyed groan. “But I was just getting started with him!” he whined, letting the boy out from under his boot and watching as he scuttled away like a bug.
You couldn’t move. You stayed put as the boy pushed past you, accidentally smacking into your shoulder in the process. Your eyes remained wide, staring at the tall man with fear written across your face.
This was not the Niragi you knew. It was not the Niragi you defended from those bullies. This was not the Niragi that used to be your closest friend, possessing a shy and timid personality. No, that Niragi was dead now. This was a devil standing in front of you. Nothing but a violent jerk that struck fear in anyone that he came across. What happened to him?
Unfortunately, you took a little too long to gather your thoughts and before you knew it, a rough grip was on your shoulders shaking you out of your daydream. You flinched in a panic as you saw Niragi’s angered face appear in front of yours.
“What are you looking at? You want some too?” he growled, shoving the barrel of his gun against your temple. You froze, staring into his dark, evil eyes, not knowing what to do.
You watched in confusion as his hard and angry facial features softened, rage turning into surprise, and even concern.
“Oh my god,” he whispered, taking his hands off your shoulders and backing a way a bit in shock. You kept your eyes on him. You wanted nothing but for him to recognize you a few minutes before, but now you weren’t so sure.
“Y/N?!” he exclaimed suddenly, causing you to jump as his tone. A large smile grew on his face, only you viewed it as nothing but sinister and evil.
“Oh my god Y/N! Since when did you get here?!” he asked excitedly. He quickly moved towards you again and held his arms out to give you a hug, but you backed away and shook your head, making him frown.
“What’s wrong? Don’t you recognize me? It’s me! Niragi! Your best friend!”
You shook your head again, trying to get the message across that you didn’t want him near you. “Sorry Niragi,” you mumbled, trying hard to keep your tears in.
You quickly darted around the corner, making your way to the staircase to run to your room. You felt overwhelmed. After everything that happened today, finding out that your closest friend was now a murderer was the last thing you needed.
Your stomach dropped as you heard heavy footsteps following closely behind you.
“Wait Y/N! Please let me explain!” he tried to stop you, but you weren’t going to give him any time after that performance with the young boy.
“Piss off Niragi!” you yelled, climbing the stairs as fast as you could, trying to get away from him.
You turned onto the floor that your room was located on, sprinting down the hallway. You glanced back over your shoulder to see that Niragi wasn’t that far behind you. He had dropped his rifle, now trying to catch up to you empty handed.
You quickly busted through your door and immediately pressed your entire body weight on it. You silently cursed Hatter for not letting you have locks.
You heard him arrive in front of it, immediately trying to open it, but you stood your ground. He may have been tall, but there was nothing but skin and bones on him. He had no muscles to help him push through.
You held the door shut with your leg and reached for a chair to put against the handle so we wouldn’t be able to open it. You managed to secure it underneath the handle and stood back, watching as Niragi tried to open it again, but failing.
“Y/N please just let me in! Let me explain! I didn’t mean for you to see that!” he cried. You almost felt guilty, hearing as he started tearing up behind the door while still attempting to let himself in.
“Please Y/N! Let me in! I missed you!”
You covered your ears with your hands. You didn’t want to listen to his pleas, it would do nothing but make you feel bad for him.
That wasn’t Niragi outside your door, that was a cold-blooded killer that you wanted nothing to do with.
**************
The next few days you spend on alert around The Beach, looking around every corner for Niragi. As much as you’ve missed him the past few years, that event that occurred with the young boy obviously showed that he was no longer the nice and caring friend that you used to have. If anything, he now has become what he hated most in his high school days, a selfish and careless bully.
Who wants to be associated with someone like that? Not you.
Although even though you managed to avoid him in person, his name was brought up wherever you went. A few people would approach you during the day and warn you that Niragi was looking for you. It only would make your anxiety spike, causing you to scatter off to a more secluded place somewhere at The Beach. Most of the time you would hide in your room, but on the few occasions you climbed to the roof or hung around Alice and Usagi (who you had befriended), you managed to keep away from the psychopath.
One day, you were sitting out on one of the tables out by the pool. It was still quite early in the morning, so there wasn’t a lot of people around. The air was quite nippy, making you shiver against the cold breeze. You rubbed your arms up and down, trying to warm yourself up. Unfortunately, you hadn’t grown used to the ‘always wear bathers’ policy yet.
You felt a gentle hand lay itself on your shoulder, making your eyes widen and your head whip around to yell at whoever had dared to touch you, but you held in your harsh remark when your eyes met with Niragi’s.
“Finally! I found you!” he exclaimed, a sickening smile spreading across his face. You leant away from his touch, scooting your butt along the seat of the table, trying to make distance between the two of you.
Niragi obviously didn’t like this.
“Why are you avoiding me like I’m some kind of disease? I just want to talk to you! I haven’t seen you in years!” he said annoyed, taking a seat at the table.
You eyed his sniper rifle closely, watching as he placed it down on the table in front of him. You felt somewhat relieved that the barrel was pointing away from you. Who knew when he would decide to use that vicious weapon against you?
You blinked, not daring to say anything. You wanted to get out of the situation as soon as possible. It was unbearably uncomfortable.
“Sorry Niragi, I have to go,” you stated, standing up out of your seat and moving to turn away.
Niragi gripped the back of your hoodie and pulled you so you sat down again, making you yelp in surprise. “No, you don’t. Stop avoiding me,” he growled, placing an arm around your shoulders and pulling you closer to him.
You closed your eyes tightly in discomfort. You swore you were so close you could hear his heart beating. With a short shove to the side, you got out of his grip and stood up again.
“No, I do. I’m sorry but I really don’t want to talk to you,” you bluntly said, becoming agitated from his insistent behaviour. Why did he think he could just tell you what to do?
He frowned, standing up as well. “Fine then, I’ll just come too. I don’t care if you don’t want to talk to me. You don’t get a choice.”
You rolled your eyes and quickly started walking away from him, hoping to at least get a head-start to stay away from him. You heard him jog up to you as you kept walking, seeing his shadow appear right next to you.
You became more and more anxious the longer he followed you. He started to get a little too comfortable in his movements, even having the audacity to touch your hair and comment on how much it’s grown.
It got to a point where you had walked all the way to the lobby about three times, realizing that he wasn’t even focusing on where you were going. You turned around just as he was reaching to grab your hand, looking him in the eye with anger written all over your face.
“Can you not take a hint?! Leave me the fuck alone!” you yelled, watching as his face contorted into shock at your tone.
“I don’t want to have anything to do with you Niragi! You’re fucking insane and sadistic! Has it not occurred to you that you’ve literally become the soul thing that you hated in high school?!” you sassed, anger ripping from your words and smacking him in the face.
The few people in the lobby turned their heads at the sound of your arguing, being curious due to not seeing anyone ever dare to yell such vulgar words towards Niragi.
He tucked his hand into his jeans pocket and readjusted the rifle on his shoulder, almost looking bored. “Yeah? And what would that be?” he asked, licking his bottom lip while staring at your menacingly.
You cringed as his movements. “A fucking asshole! A little bitch that preys on those weaker than him just so he can project his own hatred for himself onto them! You’re pathetic Niragi, and it’s a real shame that no one has in this shithole has told you so. Because no one knows you like I know you, and I know that on the inside, you hate yourself more than anyone could ever hate you.”
You took in a deep breath, regaining your strength. You suddenly saw the irony in your words. You accused Niragi of projecting his anger onto others when you just did it yourself.
Niragi rolled his eyes, bringing his rifle down off his shoulder and fiddling with the bullet canister. You felt your heart stop from his actions, being afraid that he was going to use it on you.
“Don’t act like you don’t miss me Y/N,” he laughed, glancing his eyes back up to you.
You grunted in annoyance. “Just leave me alone, please,” you begged, turning around and leaving Niragi to the peeping eyes still staring at you both.
He turned his head to everyone in the lobby. As he did so, everyone turned back to what they were doing, being afraid of being caught staring and yelled at by him.
“That’s right. Mind your own business,” he shouted out across the lobby to make sure everyone heard.
He watched you as you walked away, eventually turning the corner to go search for Alice and Usagi. At least they would give you some kind of security after what just happened.
He chuckled to himself, sticking his pierced tongue out and running it across his lips once again. “Just you wait Y/N, you’ll come running back to me soon enough. You can only keep that tough façade up for so long. Just wait until people find out that you’re all bark and no bite.”
************
You stumbled your way to the entrance of the hotel, head throbbing in pain and legs aching from the muscle strain you’ve put on them. You had arrived back from your game, being the only one that managed to survive. You didn’t feel well, both physically and emotionally, so you were planning on slipping into a coma for a few days to sleep off the pain that you were feeling at that moment.
It felt like a huge effort to even lift your feet. You didn’t feel like talking to anyone, so you weren’t even thinking of checking in on Alice or Usagi. You said to yourself you would look for them tomorrow. You were in too much of a bad mood to engage in conversation. You’d probably end up snapping at them, which wouldn’t be fair on them since they just completed a harsh game themselves.
As you were just about to enter through the large glass doors before a young militant woman with short blonde hair pushed through before you even had the chance. She managed to even knock your shoulder during the process, making you hiss in pain.
She looked you up and down with a disgusted expression on her face. “Watch where you’re going,” she spat before continuing walking inside.
You rolled your eyes. “Bitch,” you mumbled under your breath.
Her head quickly whipped around to meet your eye, an angered scowl on her face. “Excuse me?” she said in disbelief.
Your words got stuck in your throat. She wasn’t meant to have heard that. “I-I…”
“I-I..” she mocked you. You felt your adrenaline skyrocket. You’ve heard of this girl; she doesn’t take things lightly.
“Look I’m sorry, it just slipped out I promise,” you stammered out, putting your hands up in a surrender. You weren’t in the mood for dealing with her shit, you were grumpy and tired. You hoped she would let you off with just a warning.
But she had different plans.
She grabbed you by the back of your hoodie, dragging you outside again and brought you over to a small alleyway that ran along the side of the hotel. You struggled in her grip and protested the whole way.
Although, you stopped fighting against her when she shoved you against a brick wall and pulled a revolver out of her jacket pocket, pushing it underneath your chin. You froze and looked at her with pleading eyes, begging for her to have mercy.
“You’ve messed with the wrong person you bitch,” she growled, giving you a quick jab to the ribs. You yelped in pain, clutching your side. It hurt ten times more, considering you’ve already faced a horrific game that same night.
“I’m sorry!” you cried, feeling tears welling up in your eye sockets.
She scoffed and smirked at you. “Wow, all bark and no bite huh?” she teased, throwing a kick to your shin, making you cry harder.
Her words angered you, making you see red for a short moment. You forgot about the revolver against your chin and gave her a quick punch to the jaw, making her head whip sideways.
She groaned, clutching her face and slowly turned back to you. You felt yourself fill with regret when you saw the look on her face. She looked like she was ready to kill you.
“Is that how you want it? Fine, have a hole in your foot. Maybe it’ll manage to get you and your attitude killed off in the next game,” she snarled.
Your stomach dropped at her words. Before you could even protest, she pulled away and aimed the gun towards the ground and blew a quick bullet in the top of your foot.
You cried out, kneeling and grasping your foot in your hands in pain, biting your tongue so you didn’t scream too loud. The pain of the bullet seeped from your foot and up your leg, spreading across your body.
The militant girl stood above you, laughing at your pathetic body lying on the ground. Your screams of pain brought her pleasure.
“Didn’t think this would happen when you bad mouthed me, didn’t you?!” she laughed, leaning down and pushing the gun against your head to threaten you more.
Another gunshot rang in your ears. For a moment you thought it was her and that she had put a bullet through your head, killing you. But then you heard a cry and saw the girl fall in the ground holding your shin with her head thrown back in a silent scream.
You were about to attempt to stand up to take this opportunity to run, but quickly jumped back down to the ground when another loud gunshot filled the air. You heard the bullet colliding with flesh as the girl flinched violently and cried out again.
You heard a menacing male laugh fill the air, and you glanced down the alleyway to see where it came from.
There stood Niragi, holding his sniper rifle out towards you both with smoke protruding from the barrel of it. A psychotic grin was painted across his face and you swore you saw his eyes shine red.
“Why are you giving my poor love a hard time?! Maybe think twice before you put a bullet through my property,” he exclaimed, chucking and walking up to the girl giving her a harsh kick to the ribs.
You felt like you were about to throw up and hearing some of her ribs crack from the collision of her chest to his boot did not help your nausea.
You rubbed your eyes and pressed your forehead against the ground. You wanted to wake up, like this was all some bad dream. Before you knew it, you were silently sobbing on the floor, tears rolling out of your eyes and down your cheeks.
You felt two arms wrap around you, lifting you off the cold stone floor and into a warm chest. You winced and whined as the bullet wound in your foot shot a searing pain through your leg. Niragi shushed you quietly.
“Shh, it’s okay. I’ve got you,” he whispered, placing his cheek on top of your head.
His behaviour was giving you whiplash. One second ago he was acting like a maniac, shooting holes through a young girl, but now he was carrying you by under your knees and your shoulders, your head tucked into his neck.
You were exhausted, your body not even listening to you. You tried to move your leg to force yourself out of his grip but didn’t even have the strength to lift it. Your head was throbbing, and you could’ve passed out easily in his arms, but forced yourself to stay awake.
As Niragi walked past the lobby to get to the medical room, he attracted a few worried faces. Some even stood up to walk over and ask if you were okay. Everyone was terrified he had bad intentions with you, knowing how he was.
He ignored the few that approached both of you, rushing down the hall to escape them. He had to get there quickly so Ann could treat your bullet wound.
When he arrived, he pushed through the door harshly and called out to Ann with a worried tone. She stopped what she was doing and turned to the door to see Niragi holding you close to him protectively, blood dripping into the ground from your shoe.
“Shit, bring her here.” She gestured towards an empty table in the middle of the room. Niragi rushed over and placed you gently on the metal table, letting you lean your upper body against him.
Ann brought over some large tweezers, a cloth, disinfectant and a bandage. You flinched at the sight of the tweezers, moving to get away from her. “No, no!” you begged, trying to crawl up the table to get away, but Niragi grabbed your waist and pinned you against his chest.
“We have to get the bullet out Y/N, we can’t just leave it in there!” he argued, brushing your hair out of your face to calm you down.
You struggled against his grip as Ann held down your foot and carefully removed your shoe and sock. You looked down and saw a small hole in the top of your foot. How could such a small injury cause so much pain?
“Alright Niragi, keep her still. This is going to hurt,” Ann said shallowly, picking up the tweezers to try and remove the bullet.
“Yep.” You felt his grip on you tighten and he tucked his chin on your head. “Please just keep still Y/N, I’m here. It’s okay,” he cooed. His reassuring words didn’t do much to ease your anxiety.
Niragi turned your face so you were nuzzled into his chest. He knew that making you watch Ann take the bullet would do nothing but freak you out more, so he wanted to protect you from the sight.
You felt fine until the pain in your foot suddenly skyrocketed, making you let out a piercing scream. You bit your tongue to try and quieten yourself, but it didn’t do much.
Niragi frowned as he suddenly felt you go limp against him. He looked down at your face to see you had passed out, eyes shut tight and letting out soft breaths.
He smiled and brushed his fingers across your face. “So cute,” he mumbled.
“Well, that’s better. Maybe if we just knocked her out with a quick jab to the head, it would’ve saved us the headache of trying to keep her down,” Ann stated bluntly, causing Niragi to laugh.
“You know how this happened?” she asked him, raising her eyebrows.
“A bitch shot her just outside the hotel,” he said with an angry tone.
Ann didn’t seem surprised. Events like that occurred a lot. She had removed a lot of bullets the time she had been there.
“What happened to the girl? Did she run when she saw you?”
“I didn’t give her the chance to. She copped two bullets into her body for doing that to Y/N.”
“Did you think maybe Y/N was the one giving her a hard time?”
“Doesn’t matter. I only saw her shoot the bullet, nothing else.”
“Fair enough.”
***********
You cracked your eyes open to a room that most definitely wasn’t your own. You groaned and sat up, wincing when the pain in your foot shot through your leg. Memories of yesterday filled your head. “I must have passed out in the medical room,” you said to yourself.
You scanned the room. It was much bigger than yours. The bed you were in was three times the size of yours, and this room even had a huge balcony. As you looked around more, you noticed that a bag of your stuff was placed near the closet.
You frowned. Why was your stuff from your room here?
Suddenly the door opened to reveal Niragi, walking in with a plate of a bread roll and a bottle of water. He saw you awake and smiled.
“Aw little mouse is awake. How’s your foot?” he purred.
You cringed at the pet name. “What’s it to you, dickhead,” you growled, getting out of the bed and standing up. You were wearing the same clothes that you wore to the game yesterday, minus the shoes and the jacket.
Niragi smirked and placed the food on a small table in the centre of the room. “Have you forgotten who saved your pathetic ass yesterday?” he asked, approaching you. “And also, don’t stand on that foot. It’s injured, you have to rest it.” He pushed on your shoulder lightly to make you sit on the bed again. He sat himself next to you and leaned towards your face.
You moved away from his face, hating how close he was to you. “Yeah, but how did you know I even needed help? And don’t tell me you were just going on a short stroll through the alleyway at eleven at night,” you said, scooting up the bed and leaning your back against the wooden bedhead.
Niragi chuckled. “What if I was? Are you accusing me of stalking?” he suggested.
You shook your head. “Why is my stuff here,” you asked, changing the subject.
Niragi glanced over at the bag full of your stuff on the ground near the closet. He turned back to you with a smile on his face. “Oh yeah! I forgot to say, you’re moving in with me,” he said excitedly.
You felt your stomach drop. “What? I didn’t agree to this.” You swung your legs over the side of the bed and attempted to stand again. You could only place pressure on one foot, so you stood on one leg.
“Oh, baby. I don’t care if you don’t want to. You’re in here with me now, whether you like it or not,” he growled, reaching out towards you waiting for you to place your hand in his.
You stared at him, trying to see if he was joking or not. But from the serious look on his face, you didn’t think he was.
“I’m not staying in here with you. You’re a fucking psycho.”
You attempted to limp over to the door, wanting to escape Niragi as soon as possible. But you didn’t expect him to be so insistent on you staying.
A sudden arm around your waist spun your around and Niragi pinned you against the door, his face far too close to yours for it to be comfortable. “Did you not just hear me? You don’t get a choice love. You’re stuck with me,” he rasped into your face with a scary smile across his.
Your breath hitched and you turned your head away as he moved his face closer, trying to force his lips against yours. You felt helpless.
“Niragi please. Let me go, I’m sorry if I ever angered you,” you begged, pushing on his chest, but he wouldn’t budge. “I promise if you let me go, we can go back to how we were in high school.” You were trying to do anything that would get him off you. Your heart was racing, and you were becoming more frightened by the second.
Niragi licked a long and slow stripe from your collar bone to the back of your ear. You cringed and sobbed at the feeling of his tongue and saliva on your skin. “Maybe I don’t want it like it was back then. Maybe I want more Y/N,” he whispered.
He tucked his face into your neck and nipped at your skin. He had your arms pinned either side of you and his leg was holding your good foot against the door. You couldn’t do anything to defend yourself.
“What have you become Niragi,” you sobbed after a short moment.
Niragi removed himself from your neck, leaning back to look at you. You stared into his eyes, seeing the same dark and beautiful orbs that used to make your heart race with love in high school, only now, they made your heart race with fear.
“I’ve become the real me Y/N, and you’re going to love me, whether you want to or not.”
2K notes · View notes
okaymybeloved · 3 years ago
Note
can you do a txt as your best friend to lover trope? i love ur blog
txt best friend to lovers (´∀`)♡
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
best friend to lovers!txt x reader
aaaa first txt req!! super excited about that, also thank you so much anon!! i’m glad my blog can give you joy :))) i hope you enjoy this!!
a/n: also sorry i was gone for so long,, i went on vacation hehe
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soobin
you two were the quiet kids in the back of the classroom
unexpectedly, you guys started becoming good friends when your moms met each other at the farmers market
maybe they did that “go hangout with the other kid while we go and gossip”
kinda forced to be together for hours which in return, turned you two into best friends
+ more under the cut!
he brought you to the tree you guys usually hung out at after school
soobin kinda looked nervous and suddenly just bursted out
“y/n, i usually don’t do this but i really like you and i really hope i didn’t ruin the friendship oh god oh god bye”
literally sprinted away
it took you a minute to process what just happened but you chased after him
catching him, you gave him the biggest hug
“why’d you run away before i told you that i liked you too”
yeonjun
okay, not to be stereotypical but yeonjun was literally the it boy
you’ve always wondered why he’s stuck with you for this long, ever since elementary school
what’s funny is that everyone knew that yeonjun had some sort of feelings for you, everyone except you
he turns down every person who asks him out and always reports back everyone who asked him out
tbh you wondered why he would tell you all of this but didn’t think much of it
until you accidentally heard him turning down one of the most popular girls in school
“sorry, __ i actually like someone right now”
honestly it made you kinda sad hearing that since you didn’t think it would be you
quickly turning around, yeonjun grabs you by the wrist
“y/n. i know you heard what i said. come on, i’m taking you out on a date today”
you were shocked but accepted excitedly
beomgyu
choi beomgyu. your best friend from middle school. or as everyone else knows him as, the class flirt.
there has not been one person that he hasn’t flirted with
since you were his best friend, you got the worse end of the stick
it didn’t bother you much at first but admittedly, it has been bothering you recently
why did butterflies appear every time he called you cute? he’s been calling you that since middle school, why is it happening now?
you really couldn’t handle it anymore so one day you just blurted it out while he was actively flirting with you
“choi beomgyu, i can’t tell if you’re actually flirting with me or not. i like you and i really can’t handle this”
he looked so shocked but it was replaced with a bright smile
“oh my god finally y/n. i’ve literally been trying to flirt with you since middle school but you didn’t get the hint”
you blushed hard
“WHY DIDNT YOU TELL ME THAT YOUVE LIKED ME SINCE MIDDLE SCHOOL”
“I WAS NERVOUS”
“i really do hate you, beomgyu. now take me out before i kiss your stupid smile away”
he winked, “i wouldn’t mind that”
taehyun
you guys have been best friends for about a year
would tell each other everything, including things that were super personal
none of you guys have ever kept a secret from each other… well, until now
taehyun was generally very gentle with everyone, treating everyone with the same respect even if they were younger
however, you started noticing that he’s been completely going out of his way to be super gentle and respectful to you
since you were his best friend, it was a weird change to the usual chaotic taehyun
nonetheless, you ignored the butterflies you would get when he would help you with things
he asked you to go bike riding with him and you agreed
the bike ride ended up taking you to a small park where you both sat on the swings
both of you were sitting in a comfortable silence until he spoke
“y/n, i really like you. i’ve been thinking about it a lot recently and you are the best person i know. i cherish our times together and i hope we can spend even more”
call you a crybaby but just that alone made you cry
not even giving him an answer, you attacked him with a giant hug and small pecks all around his face
“hehe, you’re my boyfriend now”
hueningkai
y’all know the typical “childhood best friend” type thing? yeah, you guys were the living embodiment of that
you guys would spend so much time together, people automatically assumed that you guys were dating
both you and kai would insist that it wouldn’t work out and that you guys would be better off as friends but everyone knew that wasn’t true
the way he would always become super soft with you, the way your eyes always found him in a crowded room, the way your guy’s eyes sparkled when the latter’s name is mentioned
yeah, no way people didn’t think you guys were dating
honestly, you really wanted a relationship with kai
he was handsome, sweet, funny, smart, the whole package
kai thought the same thing, you were beautiful, hardworking, determined, and knew what you wanted
you were both pining at this point and your friends couldn’t handle it anymore
one day, they just locked you two into a room and threatened to not let you out until you talked to him
it was super awkward at first, no one wanting to make the first move
kai had enough and just straight up said
“i like you a lot , y/n. can we just get this confession over with and just date now. my heart can’t take this anymore”
you laughed bc that was the most hilarious way to confess
“fine then. we’re dating now, love”
hearing the pet name made his heart skip a beat
seeing you both walking out hand in hand, your friends silently high fived each other
202 notes · View notes
hezuart · 3 years ago
Note
That anaversary aizen looks absolutely fabulous, he looks like a figure skater xd.
I heard along time ago the last arc of the anime was being animated finally bc they pulled a 90s sailor moon were the last season was not either animated or dubbed untill decades later.
I recall near the end of the current 366 episodes there was an episode were the creapy demon ppl woke up in hell and we're all bitter, and there was the other guy who was like, iM cOmEiNg FoR u IChIgO, but then is never mentioned again after and I'm like,why? Why is lt there just plopted randomly into a different arc that seams unrelated.
And locking aizen up underground seems ok, but It deff won't hold, and he will. Escape, and he will kill, you either need that one spell from star, dubbed, the darkest spell of moon the undaunted, a powerfull dark spell that killed immortal beings, that came from best character, eclipsa, the queen of darkness.
We need that.
Or stick him I'm crystal like eclipsa was in star. Is there no one who could trap him in ice or crystal for all eternity.
How about throw him into the centre of a volcano trapped and caged , forverr being killed by heat?
I assume there's space travel, send I'm into a black whole, were a black whole don't fuckin care if your immortal or fat, you will die
:3
Yes, I love anniversary Aizen. His original octopus-butterfly hollow design was ugly so I'm glad he's back to being the fashion icon he is.
Locking Aizen up underground once is one thing, doing it twice after saying he got more powerful by just sitting there, and he escaped to battle the Quincy Soul King God... is another. I think he should have escaped at the end of the Quincy arc. That is the only feasibility.
I heard the anime is coming back for the Quincy arc as well, but because of COVID its probably going to be delayed. (I'm not gonna watch it until the Rain section of the arc then I'm dipping out. I'm only here for Zangetsu)
and funny that you mention that hell scene in the manga :)
-> spoilers for the new BLEACH 73 page anniversary chapter / thoughts/critique on it
So hey you had a premonition! Syazel .... returned? And his hole is outside of his body??? for some reason???
(I didn't understand the explanation or why / how that happens and what that means for the hollow)
And my friend and I were laughing because out of ALL the things. Kubo could do in this anniversary. He gave Syazel his dick back after going to hell. That is iconic. (that's where his hole was located, and now that its not on his body ... well...) This is the funniest thing Kubo has EVER pulled. Kudos to you, sir.
The entire internet is freaking out over Ukitake being in hell. Honestly Kubo has done far worse, and we've established that Soul Society is a corrupt system that hasn't changed, so I'm not surprised he would pull something like this.
At the same time, Kubo 1. cheated his audience. 2. continues to prove me right that he cannot bring himself to kill his characters
1. Hollows who have commit murder in their human life are sent to hell. Syazel and Aaorniero are two of these hollows, and yet, when they are killed, there is NO gates of hell scene. We see them there later in the hell chapter (which was more of a promotion for the fourth movie and I didn't believe it would hold any merit)
But the same goes for Ukitake. We never see the gates of hell take him. What, was hell late? Did hell's gates get lost like an uber before picking him up? It's bull. Withholding such vital information from your audience, not showing the gates of hell when they should pick up this soul IMMEDIATELY is ... I mean its a lie. Kubo lied to his audience.
2. Now we are told powerful shinigami are sent to hell when they die. First of all that sounds like a security threat. Wouldn't shinigami want revenge for that? Or attempt to escape? Why would they still hold loyalty after being sent to a prison of eternal suffering?
Also "Yhwach and Aizen" were the only ones keeping Hell's gates closed is way too convenient and doesn't really make any sense. I feel like Aizen should have deliberately gone to hell to retrieve powerful shinigami / hollows for his army instead of keeping it /closed/.
This is definitely a Kubo-doesn't-know-what-he's-doing-and-is -making- stuff-up-as-he-goes, but it might have a pinch of merit because of previous plot lines.... but either way, there's some big plot holes here, but again, its Kubo, so I expected nothing less.
Again, he can't kill off his characters. He introduced zombification, he introduced immortality through the hougyoku, he has Orihime and Hachigen's reversal / rejection abilities. He brought back Luppi, friggen.... a character who's entire upper half of his body was incinerated. Like.... come on. No. He's dead, you can't bring him back like that. That's a cop out and just weird. You're taking away consequences and grief.
(Also Yamamoto and Unohana deserve to be in hell far over Ukitake, they've done some fcked up stuff in their pasts unlike him)
Also Kubo's favorite character is Mayuri, which.... you're allowed to have a favorite problematic character. But Keeping said character alive and bared from the consequences of abusing his daughter, murdering innocents, and experimenting on your own squad members? Nah. Nope. Kill him, Kubo. Kill this dude.
(his weird attachment to Mayuri is probably why he keeps bringing Syazel back, since Syazel is Mayuri 2.0, but Syazel is the bad guy who does face consequences for his actions while Mayuri is not)
~
Also, I'm certain Kazui and Orihime are going to be THRILLED that their precious husband/dad is going to hell when he dies :)
(I just... Rukia teased Ichigo about leaving Orihime at home. She teased him about having a house wife who he leaves all the chores to. Orihime had two panels. She checks on her son who promised he would be at home and sleep. Kazui fcking breaks his promise like it never mattered to him and JUMPS out the window after pretending to sleep in front of his mother. ... An 8 year old... alone... in the middle of the night.)
Orihime is abandoned. She is not invited to SS, she is not informed of what is going on, her son leaves her.... I...
Orihime is a side character. She doesn't matter anymore. She hasn't mattered for a long, long time.
A part of me is glad she had little screen time, since she tends to waste it, but another part of me is embroiled with rage.
I've even see people try to defend this. "Orihime and Ichigo can't be together ALL the time, that's an unhealthy relationship!" and I'm like guys... that's not the point. The point is Orihime is not part of Ichigo's other life. Any shinigami stuff from now on is none of her business. She's going to stay at home while Kazui and Ichigo go off and save the world. Ichigo is going to be fighting by Rukia and Renji while Orihime watches from the sidelines, or worse, doesn't even know what is going on with her husband and son. Orihime is going to be uninformed and abandoned, because she has not proven she is capable of fighting by their sides(go on, @ me. I will fight this. She's a failure.), and also because she prefers a human life over a dead one. Which is ironic, because she married a dead man. Ichigo is a shinigami, and he will be one forever. god forbid she ever meets his Zanpaktou. She would tremble in fear at the monsters her husband harbors in his soul, especially when she realizes they don't care about her and would rather see her dead. (Zangetsu would absolutely kill Orihime. Not sure about Kazui, but Orihime has not accepted Zangetsu, she does not like either of them, and the feeling is assuredly mutual.) frick now I want to make a comic about this
Also still frustrated over Zangetsu's shikai / bankai regression. Kubo once again lied to his audience. Ichigo has no bankai. How ridiculous is that? The main character of BLEACH doesn't have a bankai. Insulting.
(RIP to Chad. He doesn't exist anymore. He's just gone. No mention, no cameo. Gone.)
Kazui is a demon child. That character from the novels? Hikone? They're the same character. Literally same personality, same power level. Its worse because Kazui is a liar. He constantly goes behind his parents' backs. He can summon creepy fish and creepy eyeballs and open portals like is ANYONE aware of this? How has SS not kidnapped Ichigo's son and experimented on him / locked away his powers yet? All substitute shinigami require a reiatsu controlling / spy badge to keep them in line. Where is Kazui's? Or is he just a weird fullbringer?
I was worried Kubo was gonna try and pull a knock off Boruto but luckily he kept the focus on Ichigo and the others. But that being said, Ichika and Kazui are now just... sort of there? Kazui was kinda just.... having his own adventure that doesn't matter to the plot at hand, and Ichika had some nice characterization at first but she just hid behind her dad the whole time.
I have a feeling Kazui is gonna step in at the last minute or do some major behind the scenes thing that indirectly interferes with the main plot so no one will realize how powerful and dangerous he actually is. Its sad because Ichika is the superior character in personality and likability, but she clearly is not going to have a bigger part in this.
Ichigo having a normal life after everything still feels extremely boring and uncomfortable to me. Everyone's like 'I'm still bLEACH!" but.... BLEACH just... doesn't feel like BLEACH anymore. It hasn't for a while now.
~~~
There's two new shinigami characters. Didn't care for the girl, but the Sign Language kid who talks to animals is adorable ... however... he just reminds me of Chad, and I just... it hurts knowing Chad has essentially been deleted. Chad and Orihime are officially benched. They have chosen the human world, and Orihime has given Ichigo his spawn so she has no more use/purpose to him anymore... ////sigh
~~~
Also. This is claimed to be a new "arc". So is the BLEACH manga coming back? What is happening. I thought Kubo was tired and didn't want to do BLEACH anymore. I thought Shounen Jump cut him off. People made so many excuses for Kubo and why the past two arcs have been so badly written the past 6 years and now almost everything they've attempted to defend him with has been revoked.
BLEACH is going to continue to screw up its plot lines and characters, so Its probably best for it to stay dead but I've seen a lot of Kubo stans drooling over this content, they're desperate for BLEACH's return, but its already given out all its possible revelations. There's really nothing else to top here. It's just going to make things up as it goes along ,and I'm not really here for half-assed writing like that, especially since the damage of rushing the previous manga has already been done. Kubo and Shounen Jump are riding off a money nostalgia. None of this was planned.
Honestly though.... overall feeling of this chapter, not as bad as it could have been.
Syazel stole the spotlight, and he's my friend's favorite character, so that's all that really matters.
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zhongliologist · 4 years ago
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Missing You | Zhongli
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Pairing: Zhongli x gender neutral!reader
Genre: Fluff/ slightly suggestive
Words: 2.5k
A/N: just some brainworms bc the zhongli tag needs more content skskks;; if u liked this, and want the nsfw continuation, pls tell me!!
*
There was only one time of the year where you could meet him.
When a hundred lanterns glow golden like bright cor lapis before a deep dark sky, when Mt. Tianheng itself tremor and bow to its very bosom as the Guili Plains remember the hundreds of battles which shook its very ground, when the rich harbor city flourishes itself with aromatic dishes and throes of lively visitors from afar only to see one single important event.
 There was only one time of the year where you could meet him, and it was only during the Rite of Descension.
 "Did you wait for long?"
 A familiar voice greeted, warm and deep. The book on your hands now brought down to your lap as soon as you heard it, waiting for your visitor to find you sitting by the windy balcony. It didn't take long though when you heard his heavy footsteps and the rustling of his clothes.
 "Zhongli…"
 You whispered solemnly to the wind as you took a side glance at him, seeing that he had never changed even for one bit.
 He still had those piercing amber eyes that seem to know more than he had dared to show; the same silky dark hair tied neatly in a low ponytail which rivals the softness of pink silkflowers in spring, and a tall handsome gait that purports old wisdom and intelligence to anyone he encounters.
 It was really him. Zhongli.
 The only man you ever loved.
 He took one step closer, caressing your cheeks from behind; his eyes softening for a moment when he felt your hands cover his as you melted under his touch. There was something about you that he couldn't quite describe; a certain quality, like a gentle warmth opening inside his chest which made his rigidity crumble into ruins.
 "Your hands are cold," you whispered to the inside of his wrist, giving a small kiss to his skin. Your own hands intertwined with his, gently and slowly touching his fingers as to embed the memory of his touch to your mind, for days when you couldn’t see him.
 “And yours are warm,” he remarked, looking down on you with a ghost of a smile as you gazed up into his eyes. “Warmer than anything I’ve ever touched in this world.”
 A small rumble of a chuckle escaped from your lips. “You always say the most poetic of things.”
At your comment, he raised one elegant brow. “Do you not like it? I could stop if you wish, my love.”
 Nestling into one of his palms, you closed your eyes yet your smile never faltered. “No, please don’t stop. I really like that about you—how you view and describe things with such beautiful words. It makes the world more colorful.”  
 “Is that so?”
 His voice was neutral but you can tell he felt relieved by your response. He may not show much, but to you, he is one incredibly endearing man. The way he would share his love for Liyue’s history and culture to you so enthusiastically; or the way he would be so thoughtful and considerate whenever you felt like the ground would swallow you whole. He has always been your anchor, a rock for you to hold on. Hopefully, he felt the same as well.
 “You’ve given my world so much color, you know?” You replied back with a grin, “So much, that you can hardly imagine.”
 Bent down to steal one small peck from your lips, Zhongli gave a deep chuckle as he stared into your eyes with his own—which to you looked as if they held the secrets of the universe.
 “Ah, would you look at this. You aren’t as bad as a poet either,” he remarked with lilt of a playful tone in his voice. “Perhaps you can sell your own book someday.”
 You snorted, grinning. “Are you teasing me now, Zhongli?”
 “Surely not. Must be your imagination,” he replied before closing the gap between your lips once again.
 This time, you both didn’t let go, just enjoying the feeling of each other’s lips against the other in a slow but sensual kiss. You held on to him tightly as your hands easily finding purchase around his neck, while he kept his hands on your cheeks. Eventually, the both of you pulled away.
 In a breathless whisper, you asked. “Is it my imagination or are you much needier this time?”
 Zhongli can only look at you with eyes mellow and soft, bearing no words of explanation, but for some reason it was enough for you to realize his answer. You cupped his cheek for a moment and gave him another kiss.
 “I missed you, YN.”
 Those words held so much weight compared to everything he had said so far. Those words which directly reflected the turbulent feelings in his heart which he could no longer control. All the longing he had to endure when he was away from you, and the thought of you patiently waiting for this exact moment in time was enough for him to pour it all out in those few measly words which most people take for granted.
 You understood all of that and smiled sweetly at him. “And I’m right here, right now. Let’s enjoy these next few days where we can be together, alright?”
 As his thumb traced circles on your cheeks, the worry in his expression gradually faded away and was replaced by an endearing smile. Yes, there was really something about you that just makes his chest clench so tightly.
 “Why don’t we go inside? It feels a bit drafty out here,” he suggested as he straightened up, refusing to let go of your hand even after you had already stood up and started walking inside the room.
 “So how was it, your business trip?” You asked, placing the book you were reading before on top of a stout cabinet as Zhongli found himself seated on your bed.
 For a moment, he only stared at you with his hand on his chin. “Business trip?”
 “Don’t you go on business trips for almost the entire year?” you asked him, wondering why he could forget such an important detail.
 “Ah, yes. The business trip…,” he replied, still looking as if he was thinking deeply about it. “It was…splendid.”
 “You talk as if you haven’t really been there,” you remarked jadedly, eyes narrowing at him while you untied the heavy braids on your hair.
 “Well, my thoughts are always here in Liyue, and my heart, in you.”
 “You’ve gotten pretty good at sweet talking, haven’t you?” you asked as you pursed your lips. “Childe has been rubbing off on you.”
 To be clearly honest, you always thought Zhongli was a pretty suspicious person. You hardly knew anything about him except for the fact that he works for the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor and has an abundant knowledge about Liyue and its culture. He never really talks about his family or his childhood. And you were absolutely sure the business trips were phony.
 Where does he go for almost a year then? Why is he only available during the Rite of Descension?
 Well, those were questions which you didn’t really care for the answer.
 “I assure you, my love, that I am only speaking the truth,” he told you indignantly as you got closer to him. “Not a day passes by without me longing for your touch, for the sound of your voice, for your love.”
 “I’ve missed you too, Zhongli,” you replied, grinning as you placed your hands on his shoulders. “You and all of you.”
 There you were standing before him while he easily placed his arms around your waist, drawing you closer to him as if by instinct. Cupping his cheeks, you could only smile at his flattering words; amused by his strange quips.
 “It pains me to know how long you await my arrival every year. How it must have felt lonely to you when I am away, and I am no different. I wish for the day to come where I am allowed to embrace you like this forevermore,” he said as he closed his eyes to feel the gentleness of your fingertips.
 “Wasn’t it you who told me time is irrelevant?” you asked, giggling. “A second may pass by forever; and forever may pass by in a second.”
 “Yes,” he agreed, nuzzling on your chest as his hands roamed your lower back. “Time neither flows forward nor backward. It skips and jumps and goes by in a blink of an eye. There is no arrow of time. I know that all too well.”
 You arched a brow at him. “You do?”
 For once, Zhongli smirked as he deftly guided your back to the bed and hovered just above you. “As a matter of fact, you are no stranger to it as well.”
 “Me?” you asked in bewilderment, wondering where he was going on with this. “I’m sure time moves normally for me.”
 “Ah, was that too cryptic?” he asked when his face was just a few inches away from you. “If words lend no help, then perhaps my actions will make you understand.”
 Without waiting for any reply, Zhongli pressed his lips against yours in a searing kiss. Moving sensually yet at the same time as gently as he could, you couldn’t help but give into the kiss; your arms wrapping around his shoulders without second thought.
 “Zhongli…mmn…” you whispered as you felt his hands creep underneath your clothes. “What…”
 Instead of responding, he only pushed deeper; waiting for a moment to push his tongue pass your lips. You weren’t able to resist him and could only gasp as he intertwined with yours. It left you in a daze as the heat of the moment rushed to your cheeks, making you sweat. You could only cling to him tightly while enjoying a kiss you had waited for almost a year.
 Eventually, he pulled away and glanced at you, breathless and eyes blown wide. Then and there you finally understood what he meant by knowing it all too well, when you felt that the kiss was too short, too fast.
 “It has dawned on you, hasn’t it, my love?” he asked with a smile, before pressing small kisses to your cheeks, to your forehead; then to your nose and tracing back to your lips. “How time often flies too fast…how time often moves too slowly. It’s as if you have become the master of my time.”
 “Funny how you said the exact same thing when we first met,” you replied as you brush his locks away from his face.
 “Have I?” he asked with a thoughtful expression. “That is no surprise, however. You made my whole day vanish in a second.”
 Without removing your hands from his cheeks, you gently caressed him as you replied. “Did you enjoy my company that much?”
 “In fact, I do,” he said as he gazed right into your eyes, as if putting you under his spell. “Not too many have an interest in Liyue’s past traditions in this present day. It was a wonder to have met you that day.”
 “Well, it is my job as a scholar to research about these things It’s only natural for me to be interested,” you told him. “It’s amazing how meeting you felt too long ago, and now we’re here.”
 To Zhongli, those were days when time seemed to move in a snail’s pace. Days crept and months crawled so slowly as the growing desire to see you only became stronger and more prominent.  Whenever he was away from you, he was worried he might not see you again when he returns to Liyue. Year after year, that fear was simply exacerbated by his greed for your love.
 “You are my one and only, YN,” he told you as he stole one chaste kiss before nuzzling on your shoulders, and taking in your scent. “I shall do everything in my power in order to be with you. Even if I have to make a deal with the devil. I promise you that.”
 You could only sigh at his declaration. There was no way you could possibly convince him out of that thought—it wasn’t obvious, but he can be fairly stubborn. Yet even so, you’ll try.
 “Zhongli, you don’t have to do anything. I am content with waiting for you. Even if I feel lonely, even if I we can’t be together like other couples do, I’ll stay with you because you’re the only person I will ever love.”
 You continued after a beat as he lifted his head up to gaze into your eyes; his amber orbs glimmering against the reflection of the night.
 “If time moves however it wants to, and the concept of the ‘past’ and the ‘future’ no longer matter, then I will only think about the ‘present’,” you replied, your hand brushing his long silky hair, feeling the strands between your fingers. “A present where you and I exist at the same place and at the same time is all that matters now.”
 As you said those words, Zhongli caught your hand and began kissing your fingers gently one by one. By now, he might’ve kissed you for a hundredth time already. Maybe at the end of the night, the number will go so far as to a million.
 “Very well said, my love,” he remarked with a smile, still not done kissing your palm. “How is it that you know exactly what I feel?”
 “I could say the same to you.” You grinned as you held on to his coat, “Now, take these off. We don’t have all night.”
 Zhongli raised a brow at you with a rather enigmatic smile as he sat up straight. “As far as I remember, have you not told me that you care not for time?”
 You pursed your lips at his subtle teasing. “Do you want me or not?”
 Making a low chuckle, Zhongli simply glanced at you with a glint of mischief in his eyes. While he may not be the type to flirt as much, he just knows what buttons to push to make you feel like putty in his hands.
 “Forgive me, my love.” He crawled back to you, easily unfastening his coat and vest, as it slid on the floor with a loud rustle. “I was unaware of your excitement. Allow me to rectify.”
 “You want this as much as I do,” you retorted back as your arms easily wrapped themselves around his broad shoulders. “Correct me if I’m wrong.”
 Zhongli scoffed and smirked as he threw his tie right on the floor—that looked downright sexy. “There is nothing to correct.”
 In a heartbeat, Zhongli once again captured your lips, and it was nothing like before. Passion burning like a wildfire as your lips moved against each other in a frenzy; breaths too heavy as excitement made your heart pound in erratic beats. Every kiss you could’ve shared in a single year poured into one moment, as he pushed deeper into your mouth; as his hands easily found your skin to touch.
 “Zhongli…wait!” You muttered breathlessly as he moved to pepper kisses down your jaw and to your neck.
 “I have waited long enough, my love,” he replied, his lips now nibbling on your earlobe; his unbuttoned shirt easily revealing his toned chest as he moved closer to you. 
“I cannot wait for much longer.”
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soupette · 3 years ago
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C!Dream being treated kindly feels wrong to me. The idea of C!Dream getting a redemption arc feels wrong to me.
It feels wrong to me, and I think some other people feel similarly, and I think I can kinda put into words why?
I think the thing that’s the biggest factor in why possible redemption/sympathy for C!Dream feels Wrong to some people rn has to do with Exile.
To me, I can’t really sympathize with C!Dream, even with his abuse and the prison situation rn, because I still resent him for Exile.
And with every situation as it is rn, I feel like he’s gotten away with it.
Because I think there’s a question that’s important: Who knows the extent of what happened?
•Tommy obviously, as it was done to him
•Dream, because he did the abuse
•Arguably Wilbur, because he has Ghostbur’s memories(?) and Ghostbur witnessed much of Exile, not the entire time as he was sent away but enough to witness abuse
•Possibly Sam, because I believe he mentioned Dream telling him what he did to Tommy to the Eggpire, and seemed disturbed and protective over Tommy, but we don’t technically know what he was told
•Ranboo, along with Techno and maybe Tubbo? know more than most, or have seen some about how it’s affected him. (Ranboo wrote letters with Tommy and saw Tommy’s concerning words, Techno worked with Tommy after his exile and witnessed his behavior and fear of Dream, along with Dream threatening to burn his disc if he didn’t come with him.
Other a few, people don’t really know what happened. Not really anyone other than Tommy himself knows exactly how fucked up it was. Nobody else, besides the victim and abuser, knows the extent of what happened. (Ghostbur didn’t witness everything so neither did Wilbur; Sam, through Dream’s words and getting his knowledge, still wouldn’t know how Tommy felt or acted in personal moments Dream wasn’t there to witness)
Okay. Another important question, worded twice bc I talk too much: What are the consequences of those people knowing? What’s happened because of it?
Well, in terms of people holding Dream accountable specifically for Exile?
Nothing, really. Dream’s essentially gotten away with it.
His actions did lead him to prison, which is definitely a punishment and accountability for his manipulation and crimes throughout the course of the server and all that jazz, but that wasn’t for Exile; that was really rather for the whole Finale situation and everything else. I don’t think that’s Exile accountability because it wasn’t intended to be so. Sam knows about exile because Dream told him, but I don’t think he knew then. He only learned after Dream was in the cell. It didn’t play a factor in locking him away.
Sam defended Tommy from the Eggpire, showing an understanding that he’d been through a lot, and he treated Tommy with kindness during the Hotel era. This can be seen, at least partly because Sam has had a positive relationship with Tommy before, in response to Sam knowing about Exile from Dream. But this reaction only affects Tommy rather than involving or directly referencing Dream.
And what happened with Sam later on? Well, because of his role as the Warden and his attachment to the rules, he ended up locking Tommy in the prison with Dream. So from a character who arguably Knows about the abuse, that’s not an action that holds Dream accountable, and as of now it looks like that’s not really going to happen.
Techno, a character who has Seen A Bit (“come with me or I’ll burn you disc” in front of his eyes, saw Tommy’s behavior after exile, hid Tommy from Dream, who was looking for him) doesn’t Know Enough to have a full understanding and Doesn’t Know what actually happened and ended up teaming up with Dream. He didn’t seem to care when told Tommy was beaten to death by Dream.
Wilbur technically held Dream accountable, in a way, for a moment, though not to his face—he told Tommy that he would have killed Dream for how he treated him. That was a moment where a character other than Tommy said, essentially, That Was Fucked Up. But he then changes his mind and tells Tommy he agrees.*
*I feel like I explicitly remember Wilbur saying he agreed with Exile in a certain point at a stream but I rewatched a bit and didn’t see it when I was expecting to. I still need to rewatch it all but I may be wrong on this wording?? Nonetheless he expresses Dream is right and that he’s in prison because he dared to be a challenge.
So from the non-Tommy people that know Dream hasn’t recieved backlash for Exile, to his face or about him or otherwise.
In general, this is understandable because Tommy has barely processed the extent of the trauma and abuse himself (I don’t think he’s even used the word abuse yet? I think he’s called it manipulation and has used trauma) and not many people know. And as I went through before, the people who do know don’t Know Everything or they still haven’t really done anything to acknowledge Dream as the abuser.
But recently, with the prison plotline and the torture plotline where Dream is suffering, and where he might possibly be broken out and given a healing arc or even redemption, that’s pretty uncomfortable to me.
That creates sympathy for him and puts him in a vilnerable siruation.
That’s fine and natural to sympathize with someone in a situation like him; I kind of feel guilty I don’t. It’s fine for characters to sympathize and it’s fine for viewers, etc.
But it’s uncomfortable, to me, because it’s not Dream in his entirety that’s being treated nicely. It’s a version of Dream who hasn’t done all he did in exile because people don’t know what he did. Their perception of him is without that act of cruelty and in my opinion, torture. The audience knows; characters don’t.
Fine, if the characters learn what happened, they can still break him out, they can still help him recover mentally, if that’s what they want to do. But if they don’t have that knowledge, to the audience watching and knowing what they don’t, it brings about a sense of injustice.
It’s like the fandom is at the risk of moving on from Exile because in the story, it’s really brought up by nothing but Tommy’s trauma responses?
I lied. As I get further I’m getting more aware I’m actually terrible at this putting this all into words. While knowing abuse is abuse and both Dream and Tommy should have help for their trauma:
It just feels cruel for an abuser not to be properly known as an abuser and receive sympathy or empathy from characters who’ve treated the abuse victim without sympathy or empathy, even if they didn’t know.
I worded so much of this badly lmaooo my bad
TLDR: I think it’s off-putting to see Dream being given sympathy as an abuse victim when we haven’t seen him really acknowledged as an abuser.
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watchmegetobsessed · 4 years ago
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TO LOVE AND BELOVED - Part Five (Harry Styles)
a/n: ahh idk why but writing this part took me forever! but its finally here and i can’t wait to see your thoughts on it! i was debating for a long time if part 5 should be the last one, but then i decided to add another part, bc there are two more things i want to include in the story and i couldn’t squeeze them into this part, it’s already the longest so far, so we have one more part left of the story! also, a little warning that part 6 might take a little longer than the prev parts bc im a little behind with my schedule but it’ll try my best!
pairing: CEO!Dad!Harry X Reader
warning: mentions of death, cheating and divorce, sexual content
word count: 12k
SERIES MASTERPOST masterlist
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You’ve been feeling like a teenager sneaking around her parents these past weeks. Only that you’re an adult and the parent you are trying to keep your secret romance hidden from is a four year old little girl.
Your birthday was a turning point in your evolving relationship with Harry. Like a wall has been brought down and he finally started reaching out to you. It feels like with every passing day you’re getting closer to him and you can see the progress he’s been making thanks to his therapy sessions and how much he is trying to make a change himself as well.
Stolen kisses and tiny touches have been a usual in your every days whenever Izzy was out of sight for the shortest second. You’ve realized that Harry is an affectionate person, he likes to keep you close and he never fails to bring passion into the tiniest kisses.
With Izzy around 24/7 it’s been hard to find time when it’s just the two of you, but you’ve been waking up early in the morning just to spend that twenty minutes alone with Harry while he drinks his coffee. Sometimes you just sit in silence, trying to wake up for the day ahead of you but sometimes he talks your ears off about anything and everything. In the evening, when Izzy is already sleeping the two of you usually wind off together in the living room or watch a movie in the entertainment room, just enjoying some alone time. It’s not much, but more than nothing and you’ve grown very fond of these little moments with him.
Nothing more has happened than just kissing. Despite the progress Harry has made so far you can tell he still has quite a few conflicts buried deep inside him and you definitely don’t want to rush him into anything he is not ready for. Some cuddling on the couch or short but passionate make out sessions in a corner while Izzy is not paying attention, you haven’t gone further than this.
Now it’s the last day before Izzy leaves to Harry’s mum for the week. He is dropping her off Sunday afternoon and it will leave the two of you alone for seven full days. Well, Harry still has to work during the day, but from the moment he’ll get home, it’s just gonna be you and him.
You had to make a few phone calls so you’ve been locked in your room for a while now. When you come down you find your favorite father-daughter duo on the couch, some kind of Barbie movie playing on the TV, but Izzy is busy with something else. She’s got her water based flooring pens scattered around her, Harry’s tattooed arm laying across her lap as she is coloring the patterns as if it was her favorite coloring book. Before they could notice you, you run back to your room and grab your polaroid camera and returning you snap a picture of the adorable scene. The shutter of the camera makes Harry’s head snap in your way, a smile tugging on his lips.
“Hey,” he softly greets you. You put the camera and the photo aside to the cupboard near you before joining them on the couch.
“Hi Y/N! Look!” Izzy beams happily, pointing at Harry’s ship tattoo that is now fully colored with yellows, pinks and blues.
“It looks better this way,” you smirk down at her before your eyes meet with Harry’s over her head, smiling at you softly.
Making yourself comfortable next to them, you watch Izzy work on more of his tattoos and you find it such a heartwarming scene, you want to remember it forever. Harry Styles, such an influential, successful and serious businessman, sitting on the couch in his loungewear while his daughter is using his tattooed skin as her personal coloring book. He really is a wonderful human being and the best dad to his daughter.
“Y/N, do you have any tattoos?” Izzy asks, turning to you with curious eyes.
“I actually do,” you answer and you see Harry’s eyebrows shoot up in surprise.
“You really do?” he asks, his head resting on the back of the couch, turned to face you.
“Yeah,” you nod with a soft chuckle.
“Where?” Izzy asks perking up at the new information.
“Um, it’s right here,” you tell her pointing at the side of your hips, covered with your sweatpants.
“Can I color them?” she asks innocently, but Harry is quick to react.
“Izzy, you’re being a little too nosy,” he warns her as always, and she looks at you with a pouty look.
“It’s fine. Um, yeah, you can color it,” you nod.
Sliding lower on the couch you roll down the waistband of your pants until the tattoo is revealed on the side. You catch Harry’s eyes wander over the skin you are now showing and you can see a slight blush tinting his cheeks. He hasn’t seen this part of your body uncovered yet, he hasn’t even seen you in a bathing suit so far so it’s quite the new thing.
(reference for the tattoo)
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The tattoo on your side is a simple yet meaningful one, dedicated to the special bond you and Trevor share. It’s a minimalistic yet beautiful piece of two koi fishes swimming in a circle, one is left blank as while the other one is black so their formation resembles the yin-yang symbol. You got it when you turned twenty, when Trevor was just in middle school, but he promised you he would get the same design when he turns eighteen that will happen in the fall.
“That looks beautiful,” Harry breathes out with a shy smile and you notice how he doesn’t ask about the meaning behind it. Not because he is not curious but because he is insanely respectful and he doesn’t want to ask something that’s too personal.
“Thanks,” you smile at him as Izzy grabs her pens and starts coloring the blank fish.
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The rest of the day goes by uneventfully, Harry is clearly trying to spend as much time with Izzy as possible before her week with his mother, but you also notice that he seems to be keeping something away from you, like he is trying to bring up something but he is not entirely sure how to start the conversation.
It’s not until Izzy is put to bed that he joins you on the couch, turning to you with a serious expression on his handsome face.
“What’s up?” you ask with a soft chuckle.
“I was thinking…”
“I could see that,” you tease him, giving his knee a playful squeeze. “I’m listening.”
“Actually there are two things I wanted to talk to you about. I’m not sure which one to ask first.” He purses his lips before sighing and moving his eyes to meet your curious gaze. “So we’re gonna be alone for the next week.”
“Mhm.”
“And I thought that… if you want to, but we don’t have to, it was just an idea—so feel free to—“
“Harry,” you cut his stuttering off, moving closer with a reassuring smile. You caress the side of his face and you notice how you lean into your touch, breathing out through his nose. “Don’t be nervous, alright? Just tell me what’s been on your mind.”
“Would you go out on a date with me?” he then asks and it’s the purest thing you’ve ever seen and heard from him. The hopeful but still nervous look in his eyes makes him appear like a little boy who is asking out his first crush in middle school, afraid of rejection, when that’s the last thing he has to think about when it comes to you, but it’s still cute.
“I would love to,” you smile at him and leaning closer you peck his lips softly. “And what’s the other thing you wanted to ask?”
“Well, I’m driving Izzy over to my mum’s early in the morning and I’m staying for lunch and… if you don’t feel like it’s too much, you could… maybe come with us.”
“You want me to meet your mum?” you ask surprised.
“Well, she wants to meet you as well, but I want you to meet her, yes,” he admits with a nervous chuckle. “Gemma has told her about you and my sister likes to be nosy so she might have added a little spice into the story about us when nothing was really going on.”
“Oh my, what does she think?” you ask with wide eyes.
“Nothing bad, don’t worry,” he assures you quickly. “She just made it seem like we are… dating and all,” he adds with a nervous smile. “But I told her that it’s… I mean that we are not there… yet.”
“Oh, okay. Well, if you really want me there, I would love to go with you.”
“Really?”
“Yeah. Would love to meet your mum.”
“I was afraid you’d find it a little early for this,” he admits truthfully and you can see that rationality in his thought. “We haven’t really… discussed what we are and I didn’t want to put the pressure on you.”
“Well, do you want to talk about us?” you ask softly, giving him the chance to decline if he feels like the conversation might be a little too much for him.
“I do, but I’m not sure… what to say,” he hums, knitting his eyebrows together. Last time I had this talk I was in my early twenties and I don’t even know how to start,” he chuckles shaking his head.
“Okay, then let’s just agree on some things,” you suggest and he eyes you curiously. “Neither of us is seeing anyone else, right?”
“Is that even a question in my situation?” he snorts, making a joke out of his issues clearly and you’re happy he is able to take it so lighthearted.
“Just clearing the air,” you chuckle. “So we are…exclusive.”
“Seems like it,” he nods.
“And you just asked me out on a date,” you point another detail out.
“I did. And you said yes,” he smiles, an excited shine in his eyes glimmering through his green irises.
“Yeah. So we can say we are dating? Seeing each other?” Harry chews on the terms you offered, tastes them before nodding slowly.
“I guess we could say that.”
“Okay. So… that’s what we are,” you smile at him, giving his knee another squeeze. This time, his hand finds yours and he runs his thumb across your knuckles.
“I think… I’m okay with that,” he breathes out and though it’s seemingly such an insignificant thing, you know how huge steps he has just taken forward.
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“I liked the blue one better. With the white sweater,” Heather hums, watching you through the video call. You have your phone propped up on your dresser as you’re trying to figure out what to wear today.
Though you seemed completely unbothered last night when Harry invited you along with them, but now you can feel the slight panic. It’s not even because you and Harry are a thing now, you’d feel this way if you met his mother just as Izzy’s nanny. Grandmothers can be so protective over their grandchildren, you’ve met with quite a few problematic ones while you were working at the daycare and you just want Anne to like you, to trust you with Izzy as much as Harry does.
“Okay, blue it is then,” you sigh, pulling the yellow sundress off of yourself before putting the blue one back with a white sweater.
“So you guys are now official?” Heather grins at you through the screen. “Meeting his mother and all that?”
“Define being official,” you chuckle softly.
“Like, boyfriend-girlfriend?”
“Not yet. But we agreed to be exclusively dating.”
“I still can’t fucking believe that you’re scoring the hottest dad I’ve ever seen. You lucky bitch,” she sighs, sipping on her morning coffee.
“Me neither,” you scoff.
“I’m pretty sure if the mothers who got you fired knew, they would explode. Basically every woman was in love with the man and now you are the lucky woman actually getting him.”
“I guess this is karma for what they did,” you chuckle shrugging. “Alright, I gotta go, because we are leaving soon, but I’ll talk to you soon.”
“You better be! I want a detailed essay about how it went!” she grins, kissing the camera.
“Alright, bye!” you smile before ending the call.
When you get downstairs, Harry and Izzy are already down there, Harry is zipping up her bag while she is dancing around humming to herself.
“Baby, your backpack is still in your room. Can you please get it?” Harry asks her, Izzy nods and runs towards you, stopping in front of you.
“Hi Y/N! I like your dress!” she beams at you.
“Hi! Well thank you!” you smile at her before she runs past you up the stairs. “Hey,” you greet Harry and his eyes snap up to you, his pink lips stretching into a warm smile as he leans closer and kisses your cheek sweetly.
“Hi. You look beautiful.”
“Thank you. So, any tips for meeting your mum for the first time?” you ask, fidgeting with your fingers nervously. Harry reaches out and takes your hands between his so he stops the motion.
“You don’t need tips. I know my mum will like you, she is already so excited to meet you, so don’t worry.”
“If you say so,” you breathe out.
Harry puts Izzy’s stuff in the Rover and soon buckles her into her seat before the three of you hit the road. Harry has a whole playlist for Izzy’s favorite songs so you obviously listen to that along with Izzy’s performance of all the songs, filled with misheard lyrics, but that’s what makes it even better. The car ride is about three hours, which is not that horrible. You need just one bathroom break sometime in the middle and Izzy sleeps through the last hour in the car, allowing the two of you to finally listen to music that’s not from a kids’ show.
“Do you have a song request?” you smile over at him, scrolling through his phone since it’s the one connected to the car, but he has given you permission to play whatever you like.
“Not really.”
“You don’t have songs you like to listen to in the car?”
“Not specifically. Do you?”
“Oh, I have a whole playlist for songs to blast in the car,” you chuckle.
“Really? And what songs are on it?”
“Well, I can just show you.”
You search up your user on Spotify and find the playlist in talk before putting it on shuffle. As the first song starts to play, you peek over at him to see his reaction and you spot the smirk on his lips.
“Black Eyed Peas?” he asks glancing at you shortly.
“Yeah, you don’t like them?” you smirk at him.
“I do, I just didn’t think you listen to them,” he admits with a soft chuckle.
“Are you kidding me? They give me the biggest nostalgia! I listened to them so much as a teenager.”
“So teenage Y/N gave a concert in her bedroom, singing I Gotta Feeling?” he teases you grinning.
“Not just a concert, a whole world tour.”
There’s a short silence, just the two of you listening to the song, you watch the trees and fields rush by you as you drive down the country road. The song changes to another one and you’ve already forgotten about what you talked about, but apparently not Harry.
“What were you like as a teenager?” he asks. You turn to face him and your eyes meet for a second.
“Um, like a normal teenager,” you shrug, not sure what to say.
“There’s no such thing as a normal teenager,” Harry smiles. “What did you do, what were your favorite things?”
“I was… pretty plain, if I might say. I wasn’t a rebel or too much of a geek either. I had like three good friends, we used to hang out a lot by the little lake near our neighborhood, that was like our spot. I liked going on hikes and I watched a lot of documentaries,” you admit with a small smile.
“What kind?”
“I don’t know, anything that was on,” you shrug. “My mom had this phase where she was trying to act like she was just like all the other mom’s from my school, but they were all at least a decade older than her. She was trying to prove that she was this mature, very serious woman who had her shit together and all that.”
“And she didn’t?” Harry asks peeking at you shortly.
“I mean, she did. She turned thirty when I was twelve. Most women barely just got married and started their family at that age but she had been married for eight years and had a middle schooler and a baby already. She really was mature but I could tell that she felt like she lost her twenties because of… me.”
Sighing you think back to the years when you often felt like a burden to your mom. She gave up a lot of things just to give you the life she imagined for you. She worked her ass off to raise you and later Trevor as well, have a career and do all the works around the house. Your dad was working a lot of night shifts, there were entire weeks when you barely even saw him. You don’t blame him, he was trying to provide for his family, but it’s pretty clear he and your mother grew cold over the years and it had a huge part in it.
“Do you… blame yourself for it?” Harry asks softly.
“No,” you shake your head. “It’s not like I had anything to do with being born,” you chuckle. “I just didn’t like seeing my mom struggle so much. So when Trevor was born I was trying to take over a lot of tasks around the house and with him as well. I babysat him a lot, took care of him in the mornings, I picked him up from daycare and later from school… I tried to make it easier for my parents.”
“So this is why you grew so close with him?”
“I guess so,” you nod. “I mean, I surely spent the most time with him,” you add with a short chuckle.
“And do you think this is why you’re so good with kids?”
“What is this, a therapy session?” you ask arching an eyebrow at him, but he just rolls his eyes.
“Just… trying to get to know you. Is that a problem?”
“No, I just… I’m not used to talking about myself so much. It’s been quite a few years since I’ve been in this… talking stage,” you admit with a sigh. “But to answer your question, it might have had some impact on me. I mean, I loved taking care of Trevor. It’s like I had my own baby doll, only that it wasn’t just a toy, it was a real baby I could play with.”
“Did you play dress up with him?” Harry smirks at you.
“I did,” you admit laughing. “I used to dress him as a princess a lot and he seemed to like it! My dad wasn’t really a fan of it.”
For the rest of the ride you listen to your playlist and talk about not just your but Harry’s past too. He tells you about his friends, what he was like in school and the mischiefs he did growing up, that drove his mum crazy sometimes. As you get to his hometown and he points out different places he used to go to when he was younger, you feel so much closer to him, like you’ve just gotten to see another piece of him that was hidden before.
He pulls up to the driveway of a simple townhouse and as you get out of the car you see the front door open and a woman rushes out, squealing in excitement as she runs up to Harry and hugs him tightly.
“Finally! I was starting to get worried!” she breathes out, rocking the two of them to left and right.
“Mum, don’t be dramatic. I texted you when we left and we got here perfectly in time,” Harry chuckles, holding his mum tight.
“You barely just arrived and you’re already picking on me? Typical,” Anne rolls her eyes, letting go of him. You round the car, feeling nervous to meet her. When her eyes finally fall on you, her smile grows even wider as she takes a step closer to you. “And you must be Y/N! It’s so nice to meet you!” she beams, pulling you into a warm hug as well.
“Nice to meet you too,” you chuckle, hugging her back.
“I’m Anne, but I listen to all versions of mum and grandma,” she tells you chuckling.
“Alright, noted,” you nod smiling.
Harry opens the car door of the backseat and unbuckles Izzy who has already woken up from her little nap and the moment her feet are on the ground she runs up to Anne.
“Grams!” She giggles before throwing herself into Anne’s arms who picks her up happily.
“Hi baby, you grew so much! I missed you!” she sighs as the little girl cuddles into her neck.
“Missed you too, Grams. I brought my new toys, do you want to play with them?”
“Of course! We’ll have all the time to play this week,” Anne smiles down at her. “Alright, come on in. Lunch is almost ready.”
Harry grabs Izzy’s things from the car and you all head inside. The house smells good from the cooking food in the kitchen and it’s such a cozy home, you can definitely see Harry growing up here. Above the fireplace in the living room there are a bunch of photos framed on the wall, most of them are from Harry and Gemma, but there are some more of other relatives as well, cousins, aunts, uncles and grandparents. It seems like Harry has a big family.
Harry unpacks Izzy’s stuff in her room that used to be Gemma’s apparently, he is telling Anne all about everything she needs to know about Izzy’s routines and she is listening patiently, though you’re sure she is more than capable of taking care of her. After all, she raised two amazing children already.
While Izzy shows Anne all her toys she’s brought with herself, Harry takes your hand and pulls you out of the room just to go into another one. Walking in you immediately realize that it must have been his once upon a time.
“You know, I can see your younger version in here, the one I saw in the photos downstairs,” you smirk at him, looking around. There are some old posters and pictures still littering the walls, stickers are covering the side of his wardrobe and dresser, some of them are partially ripped off already, he probably tried to get rid of them once he got older, but miserably failed.
“Yeah? I was pretty cute, right?” he smirks, so full of himself.
“I liked the curly Justin Bieber hairstyle,” you tease him and he gives you an “are you for real?!” look to which you just start laughing.
“Justin Bieber had nothing on me.”
“Yeah, sure,” you laugh before he grabs your hand and pulls you against his chest, wrapping his arms around you. “Your mum is in the next room,” you whisper against his lips as he leans down, teasing you with them just lingering on yours.
“So what? You never sneaked around your parents before?” he smirks down at you.
“I did,” you admit.
“Oh, nasty,” he comments before finally kissing you. However it doesn’t last long, because you hear footsteps coming from outside so you’re quick to move away from each other, just in time when Anne walks in.
“Lunch will be ready in a few, would you two mind setting the table?” she smiles, oblivious what was happening just a moment ago.
“Sure,” Harry nods, rubbing his nose as his other hand finds your waist and he ushers you out of the room.
Izzy helps Anne in the kitchen while you and Harry take care of the table. When everything is done you all sit down and start the feast Anne was so kind to make for you. It doesn’t take long to see the snickering but loving dynamic between Harry and his mother. Anne likes to pick on her son, call him out for basically anything and though Harry talks back, he mostly just lets her tear him to pieces. With love, of course.
“Izzy, please don’t get whipped cream all over the place!” Harry sighs when it’s time for dessert. Anne has made apple pie, one of Izzy’s favorites and she is going generous with the cream on top of her slice.
“You didn’t have problem getting cream all over you when we were making cupcakes, daddy!” Izzy sasses back, making both you and Harry drop your jaws while Anne starts laughing at her boldness.
“That was an entirely different situation, Izzy,” Harry shakes his head as he helps her with the scream before passing it over to you.
“Grams, you should have been there! Daddy, Y/N and I made a mess in the kitchen, but daddy started it!” Izzy giggles, digging into the pie.
“Is that so?” Anne smirks.
“We were just… playing,” Harry explains.
“Oh, I know how you can get when you’re just playing,” Anne chuckles. “Y/N, how do you put up with two kids in the house?”
“I used to deal with fifteen at the same time, so two is not a trouble,” you smirk at Harry who just rolls his eyes, but you see the hiding little smile on his lips.
After lunch Izzy insists on showing you the dollhouse Anne has set up for her in the backyard while Harry helps his mum with the cleaning up.
“We both know your sister likes to exaggerate stories, so I didn’t believe everything she said about you and Y/N,” Anne speaks up as she is washing the dishes and Harry is on drying duty.
“I’m glad you don’t fall for Gemma’s vivid imagination.”
“But there’s one thing she got right.”
“And what would that be?” Anne turns the tap off as she faces Harry, sighing in relief as she smiles at him.
“That you look happy.”
Harry opens his mouth to say something, but then just closes it. He does feel happy, even if he is still struggling to accept it. Anne dries her hands and reaching up she cups Harry’s face in her palms.
“Baby, I haven’t seen you like this for a long time. And I know you think you don’t deserve to feel this way, but you do. And Y/N makes you happy, clearly.”
“Mum…”
“No, honey, just… listen to me, okay?” she asks and he nods, giving all his attention to his mother. “It broke my heart to see you so… lost after what happened to Maggie. And I know that it was the hardest thing you ever had to go through, but you need to move on. She would want you to do the same thing.”
“How do you know, mum? You didn’t even like Maggie when I first brought her home,” Harry points out mumbling under his breath.
“That doesn’t change the way you felt about her. I know you loved her and I would have never wanted anything to happen to her. She made you happy and that’s all that mattered to me,” she smiles with a tired sigh. “And I just want you to be happy again. Whatever you two have going on… don’t let go of it, alright? She is making you happy and you deserve that.”
Harry doesn’t know what to say so he just nods before Anne pulls him into a tight, motherly hug that he returns gladly.
“I’m trying, mum. I’m trying,” he whispers into her hair, giving her a squeeze before letting go of her.
You stay a little longer, Anne makes you tea and Harry soaks in the last minutes with Izzy before he is forced to be away from her. You know he is looking forward to spending some time away from his daddy duties, but it’s clear that he’ll miss her terribly too.
“Alright, baby. Be good and I’ll call Grams to talk to you every day, okay?” Harry tells her, giving her one last hug. Izzy wraps her arms around his neck tightly, her face squished into his neck.
“Okay, daddy. I love you,” she mumbles with a pouty look.
“I love you too. Have a good time with Grams.”
“Thank you for everything, Anne,” you tell her, giving her a quick hug.
“Oh, you’re welcome. It was so nice to meet you,” she smiles, feeling a little touched by the goodbye. “Come back soon!”
“I will, thank you.” “Bye mum, call me if anything comes up,” Harry tells her, hugging her as well.
“We’ll be alright, don’t worry. Tell Mitch and Sarah that I wish them the best!” Anne smiles as you and Harry head out the door.
“I will! Bye!”
Izzy stands at the front door with Anne, waving after you as Harry backs out of the driveway and eventually, they are out of your sight.
Harry falls silent and you don’t have to be a genius to know that he is already missing Izzy. You can imagine what it feels like to not see her every day like he always does, when he is so used to having her around all the time.
“You alright?” you softly ask, giving his arm a short squeeze.
“Yeah, it’s just… It’s the third time I’m doing this, but it never gets easier. The first year we did it I ended up driving up here four times that week,” he admits with a chuckle.
“Nothing to be ashamed of. It’s normal to miss her.”
“I know, it just makes me emotional,” he admits, flashing you a short smile before he turns his gaze back at the road ahead of him.
The drive back home is a lot quieter than the way to Anne’s. You play some music again and Harry hums to it sometimes, but he is mostly just deep in his thoughts and you don’t want to bother him, knowing well he probably needs some time to settle with the thought of an entire week without Izzy.
You get some takeout for dinner before arriving home and eat together before putting on a movie to watch in the entertainment room. One movie turns into another and before you could realize it, you’re dosed off on the comfy couch, cuddled to Harry’s side near midnight.
When you wake up something entirely different is playing on the screen since the original movie has ended long ago. Harry is passed out, his head resting against the back of the couch, one arm curled around your shoulders while the other is resting on his stomach. Rubbing your eyes you check the time and decide it’s better if you both just go to bed before you end up spending the night on the couch.
“Hey… H,” you softly caress his cheek before you brush his unruly curls back from his forehead. He scrunches his nose adorably before his eyes flutter open, taking in his surroundings. “We fell asleep. Why don’t we call it a night?” you ask in a soft whisper. Harry sighs, nodding his head, squeezing you to his side before his arm falls from around your shoulders. You peck his cheek before pushing yourself up from the couch. He shuts the TV off and the two of you head upstairs. For your surprise, his hand finds yours on the way up the stairs, lacing his fingers together with yours.
You pad your way up to the second floor and walking past Izzy’s room Harry stops for just a heartbeat before he follows you down the hallway. When you’re about to let go of his hand to head into your own bedroom, Harry pulls you back gently, making you look at him with slight confusion.
“Do you… Maybe you could… sleep at mine, if you want to? Just a thought…” he breathes out, clearly nervous to speak what’s been on his mind.
“I would love to, but only if you’re sure about it.”
“I’m sure. It would be nice to… wake up next to you,” he adds with a shy smile and you notice how he didn’t say waking up next to anyone, he wants you to be there.
“Alright. Why don’t we both just go and shower separately and then I’ll come back to yours?” you offer, giving his hand a squeeze. Harry nods and leaning down he places a chaste kiss to your lips before letting go of your hand, going your separate ways.
After doing your usual nighttime routine you put on a pair of soft pajama pants and a simple shirt before heading back to Harry’s bedroom. The door is slightly open, the lights are still on. You knock on the door before pushing it open carefully. You’ve only been in here a handful of times and it’s strange to come here with the intention of staying.
Harry is standing by his dresser in a pair of sweatpants and a white shirt, his hair is slightly damp from his shower. As his eyes fall on your figure a small smile tugs on his lips before he glances towards the bed.
“Which… which side do you like sleeping on?” he asks and you can’t hold back a chuckle as you walk to the side that’s clearly not used by him usually.
Harry huffs with a smile before going to his side. You put your phone to the nightstand before getting under the covers, making yourself comfortable in Harry’s silky sheets. He sits to the edge of the bed, checks something on his phone before dropping it to his nightstand and he then joins you under the covers.
It’s a tiny bit awkward at first, neither of you really finding your place in such a new situation, so at first you just lie on your sides facing each other. Harry is clearly about to say something, he is just looking for the right words, so you give him all the time he needs.
“I’m glad you’re here,” he softly speaks up. “Not just because… I would be awfully lonely now without Izzy,” he adds with a cheeky chuckle. “I meant it generally. I’m really happy that you’re here.”
“I’m happy to be here too. Wouldn’t want to be anywhere else,” you smile at him. Breathing out through his nose he closes his eyes for a few seconds before his green irises meet yours again. Leaning closer he kisses you softly, just another way to tell you the same thing he just said with his words a moment ago. Pulling back he settles his head on the pillow and he pulls you into his arms, making you cuddle to his side similar to the way you fell asleep on the couch earlier.
“Good night, Y/N,” he murmurs, pressing a kiss to the crown of your head.
“Good night, Harry,” you hum back, nuzzling your face into his shoulder, making yourself comfortable in his strong arms.
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Harry grumbles lowly when his phone’s alarm goes off in the morning. He might be off from his daddy duties this week, but he is still the CEO of his company and work is calling his name. Sometime during the night the two of you got tangled up in each other. Unlike last night, now Harry is the one snuggled up to you, his heavy arm lying across your stomach, his legs mingled with yours under the sheets as you gently scratch his scalp with one hand, running the other up and down his arm across your stomach. You’re not gonna lie, waking up in a bed with Harry is far more blissful and satisfying than you imagined. Even early in the morning he has such an aura that sweeps you off your feet, the man was surely crafted by the gods.
“You’re gonna be late,” you hum, eyes still closed when he hits the snooze button and snuggles back to you.
“It’s set to when I have to get Izzy ready. We still have some time,” he mumbles against the fabric of your shirt.
You stay in bed a little longer until it really is time to get up. Harry’s morning form is so soft yet still breathtaking, even with his hair tousled and his puffy eyes, he still looks gorgeous and you find it slightly unfair how little effort the man needs to be this perfect.
Harry heads to take a shower and in the meantime you decide to start making breakfast while the coffee is brewing.
“Oh you shouldn’t have,” Harry breathes out with a thankful smile when he arrives downstairs and sees the almost ready breakfast and the smell of coffee hits his nose.
“I have all the time in the world this week,” you chuckle as you fill a plate with eggs and veggies before you slide it over to him on the kitchen island. You fix a plate for yourself as well and join him on the stool beside him.
“So… are you still up for the date?” Harry asks shyly, glancing over at you.
“Didn’t really change my mind since yesterday,” you chuckle.
“Would you be up to do it today?”
“So, eager, huh?” you tease him, nudging him with your shoulder and he just shyly shrugs, trying to push down his smile. “Today works fine for me. What do you have in mind?”
“I’m not ruining the surprise,” he smirks at you, sipping on his coffee.
“Alright, then just tell me the dress code.”
“Wear that lilac dress you wore to that birthday party the other week.”
You know exactly what dress he is talking about, but it stuns you that he actually remembers what you wore two weeks ago. He only saw you for a few minutes before you left, yet he still remembered the dress.
“Alright,” you smile to yourself before turning back to your breakfast.
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Though you have a few extra sessions booked for the week, your Monday stayed empty and without Izzy roaming around the house you have to realize that you can easily get bored without her. You got so used to being with her all day long that now being home on your own is so weird.
You spend the first half of the day lounging at the pool, something you’ve been dying to do, but you were too busy with a certain little girl. Then you have a nice lunch and after reading the book you’ve been putting away for weeks, you realize that you’ve run out of things to do. So you text Trevor if he wants a ride home after school and of course he does, so after fixing yourself up you drive down to his school.
“Hi there, how was your day?” you ask when he sits into the car, throwing his backpack to the backseat before he buckles himself up as you back out of the parking spot.
“Fantastic, as always!” he fake cheers, making you laugh.
“Want to get ice-cream?”
“You know I always want ice-cream,” he snorts smirking at you.
You haven’t met Trevor ever since things become kind of… romantic between you and Harry, and you didn’t want to tell him over the phone, so now is the perfect time to break him the news. When the two of you are sitting on the terrace of your favorite ice-cream place, your paper cup filled with chocolate and strawberry ice-cream while he chose mango and cookie dough, you finally start the conversation.
“So, I have news for you.”
“Oh my God,” he breathes out, closing his eyes for a second. “Are you leaving the country?”
“What? No! Why do you think that?”
“I don’t know, but last time you said you had news for me you moved out from home. Figured it might be something similar,” he shrugs, returning to his ice-cream.
“Well, no, I’m not leaving the country.”
“Okay, then what is it?”
“I’m kind of… dating Harry. You know, my boss.” You have no idea why you felt the need to add the last part when he has already met him, but you feel a bit nervous. Trevor is like your best friend and he had a bad feeling about Keith when you started dating him, but you ignored it. If he has a similar feeling about Harry now, you are definitely considering them this time.
“Oh!” his eyebrows shoot up. “What do you mean kind of?”
“Well, we haven’t had our first date yet, it’s happening tonight, but things have… changed.”
“So you slept with him?”
“No, I haven’t,” you chuckle nervously. “We kissed. A few times and… we talked about where it’s heading and we both think it’s going to turn into something… more serious.”
“That’s great!” he smiles at you and it seems completely genuine. “See, I told you it’s gonna happen sooner or later,” he smirks coyly, before he licks his spoon off.
“You were just drawing random assumptions because of his looks and wealth, Trevor. But it’s not about that.”
“Oh, I know you’re not a gold digger,” he teases you, making you roll your eyes at him. “So your first date is tonight? What are you guys doing?”
“I don’t know, he didn’t tell me,” you shrug with a small smile.
“Mysterious,” Trevor wiggles his eyebrows at you. “So he is finally ready to get back on the dating scene, huh?”
“Um, he is working on it. It’s a little hard for him, but he’s been changing for the better.” “That’s great. I’m happy for you,” he smiles at you. “Really, you deserve it after that asshole.”
“Yeah, I hope it’ll go well,” you smile back at him with a sigh before you return to your ice-cream.
After dropping Trevor off at one of his friends you head back home. For your surprise, Harry’s car is already parked on the driveway with another one that doesn’t belong to him when you pull up and walking in you find him with Niall in the kitchen.
“Oh, hi boys!” you greet them.
“Y/N! You are stunning as always!” Niall beams, pulling you into a tight hug right away.
“Thanks,” you chuckle patting his back. “What are you guys up to?”
They share a look and it tells you right away you are not supposed to know whatever they were talking about so you just nod smiling.
“Alright, got it,” you chuckle.
“How was your day?” Harry asks, hoping to change the subject smoothly.
“Great! Met with Trevor, just dropped him off.”
“Oh, how is he doing?”
“He is fine, struggling a little with math lately, but he is doing great,” you chuckle.
“So you have a brother. Do you happen to have a sister, maybe?” Niall asks with a coy smile and while Harry just rolls his eyes at his friend, you can’t help but laugh.
“Sorry, no,” you tell him the bad news. “But… I have a good friend and I think you’d like her.”
“A friend? Do you have a picture of her?” Niall beams, already excited about it. Pulling your phone out you show him a picture of you and Heather so he can have a good look at her. You actually think that Heather and Niall would be a good match, she might even be the girl Niall would give up his bachelor life finally.
“When are we having a double date?” he simply asks, making you and Harry laugh at the same time.
“I’ll see what I can do for you.” You let the boys finish whatever they were doing before you arrived so you go to your room, unwinding a little before you have to start getting ready for the date. Around five there’s a soft knock on your door and as you call out, Harry pops his head inside.
“Hi,” he smiles nervously as the rest of his body walks into your sight.
“Hi!” you smile back, putting your book to the side.
“I just realized I never told you the time when you should be ready tonight,” he chuckles nervously. “Is six good for you?”
“Yeah, that’s great.”
“Alright. Then… see you soon, I guess,” he smiles nodding before he walks out of your room. You can’t help a small chuckle at how nervous he seems about tonight, as if he wasn’t still sure about your feelings for him, when you’ve made it clearer than daylight.
You get the best kind of jitters while getting ready for the date. It’s like you’re in high school again and your crush has finally asked you out so you want to look your best. Since Harry already suggested you what to wear, you don’t have to spend an hour standing in your closet, trying to find the right choice. For the makeup you go for a little smokey look and you do a loose bun styles for your hair, remembering the words your mother always told you when you were a teenager.
“A woman’s greatest and most secret weapon is her neck. Men go crazy if you show them your neck and they don’t even realize it!”
You spray some perfume on yourself and put on a pair of nude heels before packing your necessities into a purse that matches your outfit. You finish with everything just in time, a soft knock signaling that Harry has returned. Checking yourself one last time in the mirror you open the door and reveal him standing at the door, wearing a pair of fitted purple dress pants with a crispy shirt on, matching your dress perfectly. And the cherry on top is the bouquet of red roses in his hands.
“Hi,” he breathes out with a nervous smile and his gaze travels down your figure, a blush tinting his cheeks.
“Hi!”
“You look… beautiful,” he smiles shyly and your heart is fluttering in your chest. It’s really happening, you are going on a date with Harry!
“Thank you,” you chuckle softly.
“These are for you. I know it’s weird that I’m picking you up from your bedroom and I’m not giving you this at the front door, but…” he chuckles as he hands you the flowers.
“It’s really nice, thank you,” you smile, taking the flowers before moving into the bedroom to put them in a vase quickly. Harry takes just about two steps into the room and stops with his hands hidden in his pockets as he eyes every movement of yours before you finish with the flowers and let him know that you’re ready to do. He holds out his hand and you take it gladly as you head out of the house.
He doesn’t tell you where you’re going, not even when you try to annoy him and bully him into finally hinting something, but you should have known that he wouldn’t break. He has a four year old daughter who is constantly bugging him, he has endless patience.
When he parks down in front of a modern apartment complex you kind of get really confused, because nothing around seems like the location you’d choose for a date.
“Are you gonna kidnap me and keep me hostage in one of the apartments here?” you ask him with narrowed eyes as the two of you head inside, taking the elevator up.
“It’s not kidnapping, you came willingly,” he smirks down at you.
“That I did.”
When you’re at one of the apartments you are really lost about what he had planned and he finally breaks your suffering and tells you what’s gonna happen as he keys the two of you into the apartment.
“This is Niall’s place, he let us use it tonight. My mum always says that cooking together is a good first date, because food brings people together and you can easily get to know each other,” he explains as you walk into the modern, but definitely very manly home. “I didn’t want to do it at home, because we are always there, so… Niall was nice enough to lend us his place for our date.”
You see that there are two full grocery bags on the kitchen counter and the table is already set for two, you wonder if Harry was here earlier, or Niall did the work for him. Either way, it’s such a thoughtful gesture and a perfect first date.
“Where is he tonight?” you ask with a small smile.
“He is visiting his mother, for a change,” Harry chuckles, knowing well you thought he would be out with a woman probably. “He said he won’t be back until later tomorrow so we can even sleep here, but I thought it would be better if we went home.”
“So what are we making?” you ask curiously as you peek into one of the grocery bags.
“We are going to attempt to make gnocchi with some killer tomato sauce. And brownies for dessert,” he adds with a small smile.
“That sounds great, what can I help with?”
“Let me just quickly pack everything out and then we have to peel the potatoes, yeah?”
“Alright,” you nod, your gaze wandering over to the spacious living room. “Can I look around?”
“Sure,” he nods while he is already elbows deep in one of the bags.
Niall’s place looks like it came right off the pages of an interior design magazine, the furnishing is modern and more on the dark color range, but not too much to make it appear depressing. Right next to his huge TV there’s a floor to ceiling bookcase filled with books mostly about music and art and you realize you don’t even know what Niall does for a living. It just never came up between his heavy flirting sessions.
“I never asked, but what does Niall do?” you ask calling out to Harry.
“Oh, he is a freelancer music producer. Tried to offer him a permanent spot at my company, but he prefers his freedom, like with everything else in his life,” he chuckles. “But he is a good one, we used to make music together when we were younger.”
Just as he says that, you spot a picture of the two of them on the shelves and your lips part in a bit of a shock when you realize that Harry used to have long hair. Leaning closer you inspect the photo better and you feel like you’re looking at two entirely different people. Niall’s hair was bleached blonde which is already enough to make him like another version of himself, but Harry is definitely the biggest shocker. He was rocking some loose shirt with the top buttons left undone, his necklace with the cross pendant peeking out and though the photo ends somewhere above his knees, you can tell that he is wearing skinny jeans, something you never thought you would ever see him in.
“You had long hair?” you ask joining him in the kitchen. Harry’s eyes shoot up to him, then he looks in the direction of the living room, a smile tugging on his lips as he probably remembers what photo you must have just seen.
“Uh, yeah. Yes I did, when I was about 21 or 22.”
“I could hardly believe that was you in the picture, with the long locks and the skinny jeans,” you tease him.
“Yeah, I was a lot different then, but after all, it’s been an entire decade since then,” he sniggles.
“Why did you cut it?”
“Um, I was pretty new in the business back then and had a few assholes telling me that it’s not too masculine and all that. It was a time when I cared more about others’ opinion than I should have so I kind of gave in and cut it.”
“I’m sorry they ruined it for you. But I’m glad you don’t care about others that much now,” you smile at him softly. Harry’s eyes flicker down to his painted nails and ring-clad fingers and you just know what he is about to ask before he even speaks up.
“Does it… bother you? That I paint my nails and stuff?”
“No,” you shake your head confidently. “Not at all. I mean, I never saw you without them, but at this point I think it wouldn’t even feel right,” you add with a small laugh that brings Harry’s smile back as well. Stepping closer you kiss his shoulder softly before turning your focus on the food in front of you. “So, let’s peel these bad boys!”
It’s the first time you and Harry actually work together in the kitchen for more than just five minutes. He is always in control at home, taking over everything with Izzy and you know it’s a good bonding time for them, so you never even tried to push your way into it without their invitation. But now the bonding is all about you and him and so far you’ve been a great team. The cutest thing is that he brought you matching aprons to protect your clothes and you look like you are in some cooking show for sure.
You keep asking questions from each other while working on the food, Harry asks you some more about your childhood and teenage years and he shares stories from college where he had this friend group of five. Niall was part of the group as well and he said he is still in touch with the other boys, but they all do very different things now, the other three are already fathers themselves and live far away, so they don’t get to see each other that much.
You are making the little dumplings while Harry is on duty for cooking them, relentlessly fishing them out of the boiling water once they swim up to the top. When that’s done, Harry starts making the sauce while you take care of the brownies. It all works out well, everything gets done easily and while the dessert is in the oven you start eating what you just created.
“Mm, this sauce is really good!” you hum when you take the first bite.
“It’s my mum’s recipe,” he smiles proudly.
At the beginning of the evening you could tell that he felt nervous, not essentially about being with you, but probably because of the thought of going on a date in general. But as time passed by and he got more and more comfortable in the situation, you could see him loosen up and calm his nerves, so now that you are eating the dinner you made together and drinking a glass of fine wine, talking about anything and everything, you feel like he is actually enjoying something he was probably terrified from before.
When the brownies are done the two of you take advantage of the nice evening weather and Niall’s amazing balcony, moving out to the lounge chairs, munching on the dessert with the skyline of the city in front of you. At one point you start playing a game of would you rather, and after a while you ask each other the most random things, cracking each other up continuously. You don’t even realize and it’s already past ten, you completely talked the evening away, but you don’t regret any of it.
You clean up Niall’s place, leaving it just the way you got it, putting some leftovers into his fridge for him as a thank you for lending you his place before you head out.
Harry keeps a hand on you at all times on the way home, he is either holding your hand over the console, or rests his palm on your thigh above your knee, but either way, he just keeps the physical touch up always. Not that you mind, you are doing kind of the same, enjoying his closeness.
Arriving home you can feel a kind of tension growing, but not a bad kind. You want him. Your desire to go further than just kissing has grown immensely tonight, but you have no idea how he feels about taking it further and you don’t want to push him past his boundaries.
“Want to… sleep with me again?” he shyly asks when you’re going up the stairs.
“Yeah, I would love that,” you smile at him, giving him a quick peck on his cheek.
When you part ways in the hallway he probably expects you to do your night time routine, but you have other plans. Grabbing your polaroid camera you pad your way over to his room, knocking on the door, hoping he is not in the shower yet. When he calls out for you, he is standing at his dresser, the first few buttons of his shirt are already undone, but he is still dressed.
“I just thought that… we could snap a picture as a nice memento of our first date,” you shyly explain to him, holding the camera up.
“Oh, yeah! Okay, how do you... how should we…?” he looks around the room and you step to his dresser, placing the camera to the top of it.
“It’s got a timer,” you explain as you set it up and tell him where to stand so you can check if he is in the frame. When it’s all set, you glance back at him. “Ready?”
“Yeah,” he nods shyly. You push the button and step back to him. “What should we…” he starts, but you already know what you want the picture to be like.
Cupping his face in your hands you pull him down and kiss him sweetly, for the first time tonight. You’ve noticed he hasn’t tried to kiss you all night, being a gentleman, but you’ve been craving it since he showed up at your door with the roses.
He hesitates for a moment, but eventually curls his arms around you, kissing you back softly. The timer goes off and the flash indicates that the photo has been taken. Pulling back you smile at him before taking the photo from the camera, setting it to the side to develop. Harry steps behind you, his arms coming to curl around your waist and you turn in his hold to face him.
“Hi,” you smile at him giddily. “Thanks for today.”
“I’m glad you enjoyed it,” he answers softly, making your heart flutter. You press your lips at his, kissing him hard and passionate, like you wanted all evening. He is quick to return the kiss with just as much passion as you put into it, his hands finding your waist as he slowly pulls you with him until the back of his legs hit the bed. He sits down and pulls you with him so you sit on his lap straddling him, never breaking the kiss as you settle in his arms, his hands roaming up and down your back.
Your kisses move from his delicious lips to his chiseled jawline and down his neck, your fingers working on the buttons of his dress shirt. You want him, you need him, he is all you can think about and the taste of his skin on your tongue is making you lose your mind.
His hands move up your thighs right to your bum, giving it a good squeeze, making you moan against the crook of his neck.
“Fuck,” he growls, throwing the two of you to the bed, getting on top of you before his lips attack yours, kissing you with a demand heatedly. His lips move smoothly against yours, devouring you with every suck and lick, making you dizzy in the head with such little effort.
He starts kissing down your neck, through your collarbone and whatever is showing in your dress on your chest. Your fingers lace through his messy curls, keeping him close to you as you try to control your moans and gasps. His fingers hook under the thin straps of your dress and he is about to pull them down when he stops, breathing heavily against your skin.
Harry lifts his head, his eyes meeting yours as he is panting through his parted lips and you cup his cheeks in your hands.
“Hey, what’s wrong? Talk to me,” you tell him softly, knowing well his mind is probably racing right now.
“I just…” he starts quietly. “I haven’t been with anyone since… Maggie,” he admits in a whisper and your gaze softens on him.
“And I haven’t been with anyone since Keith,” you admit truthfully. “We don’t have to do anything tonight. I’m fine with just sleeping if that’s all you want to do.”
“No, I want to… I want to do things, I just… I’m not used to it, I guess,” he breathes out as you run your fingers through his hair.
“It’s okay. We can take it slow. Whatever you feel comfortable with,” you assure him pecking his lips softly.
“Is it… Is it okay if we just… touch?” He is clearly feeling a bit embarrassed to ask, but you will not make him feel bad for asking for whatever he wants. Pulling him down for another kiss you smile up at him.
“Touching is perfect. It’s all up to you,” you tell him and see the gratitude in his eyes right away.
Removing yourself off of his lap you climb back on the bed, pulling him with you until he is holding himself up above you. Your eyes meet for a second again before leaning down he kisses you slowly, taking his time with you. He is holding himself up on one arm while his other hand finds your hip, gently squeezing it when his tongue slides into your mouth through the kiss. Your hands move down his chest and you start unbuttoning his shirt until it falls open and he shimmies it off with a soft chuckle.
“Let’s get rid of the dress too,” you breathe out, reaching down for the hem of your dress, pulling it up until it’s off, leaving you in only your underwear. You’re wearing a matching set with a strapless bra and as you lie back on the bed Harry’s eyes basically devour you, his gaze running up and down your body several times.
“You’re so beautiful, Y/N,” he breathes out before leaning down and kissing you again, his hand cupping your side before wandering over to your stomach and up to your chest. He runs his hand over your chest, gently squeezing it, making you moan into the kiss.
“And you’re wearing too much clothes,” you grin as you reach down and start undoing his purple pants you ogled him quite often tonight. Harry chuckles as he holds himself up for you to work the button and the zipper on his pants before he takes over the task and gets rid of them himself, leaving him in only his boxer briefs and you have to hold yourself back from gasping when you see the growing bulge between his legs.
You don’t get to eye him for too long, because he is back to kissing you, his body pressing up against yours as you let your hands roam his strong back, his skin burning under your touch. His lips travel down the line of your neck to your chest and his hand snakes behind your back, but he stops before he could do anything with the clasp of your bra. Glancing up at you he gives you a questioning glare, asking for your permission.
“You can take it off,” you softly tell him nodding. His fingers are quick to undo it and a moment later you’re lying with a bare chest underneath him. His hand moves to your chest again and he kneads your breast again, this time with nothing between your skin and his palm. You whimper under his touch, you’ve been so starved to be touched this way and now that it’s happening, it’s hard to control yourself, but Harry doesn’t seem to mind seeing you react to what he is doing.
His lips return to your mouth and while he kisses you with so much passion, he slowly lays himself down next to you, so you’re facing each other sideways on the bed. He pulls you closer to him until you’re flushed against his hard chest and while your hand roams around his shoulders and back, his palm slides down your spine, over your waist until he calms bum, pushing you even closer to him. His clothed erection presses against your thigh and you can’t help but whimper his name at the feeling.
His kisses slow down and his touch loosens on you until he pulls back, seemingly just for air, but you can tell his head is starting to race again, spiraling thoughts taking over his mind.
“Do you want me to take over control?” you softly ask him, pushing his unruly curls out of his forehead. His gaze softens and he nods shortly with gratefulness lacing through his look.
He watches you intently as you push yourself up into a sitting position, he rolls to his back and keeps his gaze on you as you hook your fingers into your panties, getting rid of them before doing the same for him with his boxers. He lifts his hips up as you pull down the elastic material, revealing his hard cock to your greedy eyes. You want nothing more than to taste him, but he said he just wants to touch so you don’t try to overstep his limits, leaving this desire of yours to another time. Instead, you lean down, capturing his lips in a sweet, reassuring kiss that everything is going fine to calm his nerves as much as you can, while you place your palm to his lower stomach, moving down slowly until you find his hard cock, wrapping your hand around his length and giving it a few gentle stroke.
“Fuck,” he breathes out against your parted lips and you can’t push a smile down.
You kiss his lips, his cheeks, his jawline, everywhere around his face while you keep pumping him, spreading some of his precum down his length to help your hand move smoother. Your actions awaken something in him, he grabs your face in both his hands, kissing you hard before he pushes you to your back, becoming the one on top. He parts your legs with pushing a knee between your thighs and while you keep up with your motions, he gets down to action as well. One of his large palms runs down your abdomen, stroking your lower belly gently before it moves to your inner thigh, spreading you even more for him before you feel his touch on your heated and dripping wet core. First, he just teasingly runs two fingers through your folds, testing how wet you are and when he realizes that you are more than ready to whatever he has planned, he moves his thumb to your sensitive clit, drawing circles with the pad of his finger, sending a wave of pleasure up your spine immediately.
“Harry!” you moan his name, running your thumb over the head of his cock that makes him gasp and stop his motions for a moment before he returns to pleasuring you.
He buckles his hips into your touch while his fingers move down from your clit until he is teasing your entrance, just circling around it but not pushing into you. Rolling your hips you signal him that you want the teasing to end and he luckily gets the hint, slowly sliding two fingers inside you, curling them gently and it makes your eyes roll back immediately. He rests his forehead on your shoulder as he starts moving his fingers in and out of you while you try your best to keep up your pumping motion as well, moving your other hand to his balls to give him some of that extra pleasure and he seems to be liking what you’re doing, because your name keeps falling from his lips as keeps fingering you, curling his digits just the right way inside you from time to time.
“Fuck, Y/N, I won’t last long,” he pants, his lips brushing against your neck before he kisses the soft skin above your collarbone.
“It’s alright. Just want you to feel good, H,” you assure him, though you’re getting closer to your release as well.
“Are you close?” he asks out of breath, still holding himself up above you, leaning onto his other arm next to your head.
“Yeah, don’t stop,” you nod, turning your head so your lips could meet for a kiss again.
You can tell he is trying hard to hold himself back, to stretch it out as long as he can. A torturous look tugs on his face and you kiss his temple, wanting nothing more than to see him finally reach the peak.
“Let go, H. It’s alright,” you whisper against his skin and he whines at your words before you feel his cock jerk in your hand and he cums under your touch.
You keep stroking him as he rides his high, gasping and panting your name while he spills his semen onto your naked stomach. His fingers stopped moving inside you as he found his relief, but as soon as you feel him recovering from his orgasm, he goes right back to where he left it, desperately wanting to pleasure you as well.
“Harry!” you moan when he hits a specific spot inside you, tingling your nerves just right, your hands come to clasp onto his broad shoulders.
“Cum for me, babe. Let me see you feel good,” he whispers before his lips occupy your mouth again, kissing you with so much passion and vigor, your senses are starting to overload.
“Fuck, I’m gonna cum!” you gasp feeling your toes curl and Harry picks his pace up, his thumb coming in contact with your clit as he tries to make you reach your high.
And then it finally happens. You stop breathing for a moment, the intensity of it washing over your whole body. It’s been so long since you felt this good with anyone, and just the thought of doing this with Harry probably adds a lot to the equation.
He slows his fingers down, but makes sure to curl them inside you every time he pumps them in, and you repeat his name over and over again until you finally catch your breath. Your gaze meets his, and you see a happy and satisfied shine in his green irises as he leans down and kisses you sweetly, pulling his fingers out of you gently.
“M’gonna get a towel,” he murmurs, pecking your lips one last time before he gets up from the bed and walks into the bathroom while you lie on his bed, totally gone and worn out from your orgasm. Harry comes back with a damp washcloth and cleans up the mess he made on you before gently moving to between your legs, taking such good care of you. He drops the cloth to the floor, not wanting to leave the bed again as he pulls the covers over your bodies, pulling you into his arms.
“How are you feeling?” you softly ask, pecking his toned chest.
“I’m good.”
Lifting your head you search for his eyes, wanting to make sure he didn’t regret any of it, but he seems calm and rested for a change. Smiling up at him you push yourself up a little so you can connect your lips before you snuggle back to his side and let yourself slowly drift off to sleep, listening to his steady heartbeat under your face.
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