#I need more Anders in my life

[echthr0s]

my toxic trait is that whenever people start talkin about how such-and-such is an allegory for some real-life social ill or whatever I can physically feel myself losing interest

[sweetmage]

I love the drama of the "Varric sees Anders when he looks at Solas" posts that have been going around, but I personally do not vibe with the common "I should have stopped Anders from blowing up the Chantry" narrative that some of them have but instead "I could have prevented it from even getting to that point." I've been putting some thought into how I would spin this for my own purposes. I'll place it under the cut since it's a little lengthy :)

To begin with, this was not an overnight decision on Anders' part. He held out for years, tried to find other solutions, tried to rally a group of supposed friends who would not hear it. Varric thought himself a listening ear, a supportive companion, but he was as deaf as the rest of them. Varric had the resources and connections to keep the templars away from his clinic, he had the fondness to invite him out to drinks and trade jokes with him, but when the threat grew larger and more serious, Varric's response did not.

Anders, who had spent most of his life in a prison surrounded by uncaring jailors watched his home, his friends--family even--become no better. And Varric became one of them, meeting every silent plea or cry for support with words and actions that protected those walls, those structures, but not the people who lived within. That was, of course, unless they were quiet, uninvolved. It was easier to face than the reality that the city he loved was rotten and diseased.

In the end, he never gave Anders what he needed. He never used his resources to fight or his words to speak out, he never even told him that he understood him, that mages shouldn't have to go through that. And in the end, Anders had to do what he could alone and Varric lost his friend and the city both.

Anders lived, but at the cost of his own freedom, his home, his friends he had tried until the very end to convince. But that didn't settle in for Varric right away. It was easier to be angry, even if much of that anger was turned inward. He disparaged Anders in the same breath that he called him a fond nickname, he protected his and Hawke's location while claiming he never wanted to see him again, he placed blame upon him for what went wrong in the world while pretending to himself that the world itself was not at fault.

It wasn't until he was faced with another friend, another mage, in a situation all too similar that Varric realized what he had done. Or rather, failed to do. And what he must do this time in turn. It was too late for Anders, he could never go back to Kirkwall and the trust he lost for his old friends must have been near irreparable, but it was not too late for Solas.

So to me when he looks to Solas and sees Anders he isn't seeing some mage who did a bad thing, he's seeing the friend he could have saved, or at least could have tried to understand, but didn't. So it's personal. He throws every resource at tracking Solas down, every contact, every favor, and when it finally pays off and he stands before him, he tries, even when it puts his life on the line. But, like before, it seems too late. He could look back and see every moment he could have offered his ear or his aid to Anders before things reached a breaking point, but he didn't have that time with Solas. He may as well have been trying to talk Anders down that evening in the Gallows when the culmination of so many years of injustice were ready to boil over. But he never tried then, he had to now for Solas.

[gainingfiction]

Heavily Used

Summary: This is a bit experimental (or weird), and maybe a bit predictable, but I had fun writing it. This is a story about an important relationship in a fat guy’s life, and the risk of taking things for granted. It’s also a story about coping (or not coping) with change.

Hope you enjoy!

~

I don’t know how much more of this I can take. I can only handle so much. It’s one thing to be taken for granted, that’s something we all have to live with. It’s just the total lack of acknowledgment, or even awareness that I’ve been under a lot of pressure lately. I swear, one of these days, I’m just gonna snap and call it quits.

A little bit about me: I’m stylish, polished, and pretty easy on the eyes, if I do say so myself. Born in Poland, but my background is Swedish—I’m European, at heart. The name is Anders, but no one actually calls me that. I’m not super high-maintenance, once you figure me out, but everyone needs a little attention from time to time. Some tending.

Especially living with Max.

I’ve known Max for a while, and he’s not a bad guy. He can be a little rough sometimes, and maybe a little careless, but it doesn’t come from a bad place. I think it’s just a lack of self-awareness. And let’s be honest, that’s a common problem among pretty-boy jocks.

The trouble with Max is that he’s not the pretty-boy I once knew. He’s changed… he’s grown. I mean, he’s literally grown. Grown by about a hundred pounds, if I had to guess, and counting. Over the course of our time together, I’ve gotten pretty familiar with his ass, and I’ll admit, it’s a great one. But, boy, he’s got a lot more ass for me to handle these days.

It’s not insurmountable, not yet at least. But I’m worried it’s getting there.

It started out simply enough, the innocent midnight snacks and occasional takeout treats. No problem, right? Twunks can afford to indulge a little, especially a hot commodity like Max. But then, you get comfortable. You settle into a routine, you let yourself go. That’s the thing about creatures of beauty: one minute you’re the hottest guy in town, trim and toned, with a golden tan and handsome face and perfect, silky hair. The sort of guy who only seems to exist in a Hollywood version of reality. But then, inevitably, something happens. Sometimes tastes change, or maybe you’re the one doing the changing.

I won’t deny, I’m not in the same shape I was when I entered Max’s life for the first time. Any long-term relationship comes with the normal wear-and-tear. Max, though, has taken it to a whole new level.

The little snacks become big snacks. The extra meals go from “occasional” to “frequent” to “everyday”. Gluttony takes over. A 32-inch waist becomes a 36-inch waist becomes a 40-inch waist; size-small shirts are discarded in the back of the closet, soon joined by ill-fitting mediums, and then by larges, stretched out of shape by a gut that won’t stop getting bigger. Max used to flit around the apartment like a bird; now he lumbers like an elephant, heavy footfalls and a slow, waddling gait. His own warning system—you can hear him coming.

On paper, I know I should be trying to help lighten the load. And it’s not like I’m totally unappreciated; there are days when he comes home from work, legs tired and arms loaded down with takeout, and I can tell he’s genuinely happy to have me. But it doesn’t last long. Once dinner’s over, I’m back to being ignored while he sits on the couch, gorging himself in front of the TV, until he comes around again to stuff his face at the next meal. Which, to be fair, is pretty often these days.

It sounds cruel, the way I talk about his escalating weight, his increasingly-indecent greed. I’m not trying to be mean. I just wish he’d consider how it might affect me. I have to live with him, and he’s starting to cramp my style. But it’s not like I can say anything. I just have to sit there in silence, while he eats and eats, grows and grows, piling on pound after excess pound. And the way he eats, moaning and licking and slurping… it’s downright pornographic.

250 starts to feel like a lowball as the months go by. He’s pushing me to my limits without even realizing it. I’ve never had to deal with a guy this fat before, a guy whose big, round bubble butt would hang over the side of even the most substantial chair. And I, personally, am not “substantial”. I’m pretty thin; it’s just how I was made. I thought Max was made that way, too.

I start trying to make my frustration known, but like I said, I can’t just come right out and say something. So I try a little subtlety; a small groan every now and then when he throws himself down at the dinner table for another round of hedonism. If he notices, he doesn’t care. He just keeps upping the ante.

And upping just about everything else: his pants size, his portion sizes, the size of his monster-truck ass and thunder thighs. They press together whenever he sits down, now, lard against blubber. Not like in the old days when his legs were lithe and lean. His moobs bulge against every tank top, his pudgy arms pack his sleeves, his love handles blossom over the top of every waistband like ripening tropical fruit.

In occasional moments of self-pity, I hazard a guess: how much does my man weigh now? 275 pounds? 300? Is he even trying to do something about it? Clearly not. He never works out anymore, unless you count working up a sweat over a third (or fourth, or fifth) slice of cheesecake. I honestly wonder if he’s doing it on purpose, just to spite me. Or test me. But I know that’s crazy—like I said, sometimes I truly doubt he even thinks about what it’s like for me.

But the problem is getting harder to ignore; he really throws his weight around these days. He heaves himself up off the couch. He rests a hand on the front of his bulging belly, barely restrained by some poor, threadbare top, back arching forward from the strain of it all (he’s not a tall guy, which makes his increasingly S-shaped silhouette even more pronounced). He trudges from the living room to the kitchen and drops himself in front of the table like an anvil. When he sits down, his ass, spilling out of some indecent pair of jean shorts, spreads out like lava blanketing some hapless Roman hamlet.

Some nights, I strain underneath him, feeling absolutely crushed by his sheer weight, boundless mass bearing down on me with the force of gravity. How big is he now? I wonder, as I listen to him moan and groan with pleasure. 325? 350? Could he really have gained over 200 pounds? How could he not realize what he’s doing to himself—what he’s doing to me?

He’s just so oblivious. I don’t even recognize him anymore. I’ve been starting to make noises about how uncomfortable I am, how much I’m struggling with his extra weight. But, as always, it falls on deaf ears. His tight little butt has become a pair of vast, ponderous globes, his abs and lats and obliques are encased in a spare tire that belongs on an 18-wheeler, his tits bulge out and dangle towards his armpits. And he just. Keeps. Going. 

Keeps eating. Keeps gaining. Keeps expanding.

Things reach a boiling point before dinner one night. I can see him piling up the table, unboxing some outrageous quantity of food for his secret nightly mukbang. Well, secret except for the consequences, which anyone with eyes could notice. “There’s a man who likes his food” would be such a trite, vapid observation that it doesn’t even need saying. He doesn’t just “like” his food, he lives for his food. Food is practically a part of Max’s identity at this point.

He’s starting to lower his colossal ass to sit, and I can tell this is it. Tonight’s the night. Fuck it, I’m done. He’s well past 350 pounds, and that’s too much weight for me to handle.

Maybe he’ll appreciate me more when I’m not around. Hejdå, Max, it was nice knowing you! At least, it used to be.

~

Max sat on the floor, rolls of fat still wobbling from the jarring motion of his fall. His chair had been complaining for a while now—squeaking and groaning every time he sat down—but he hadn’t expected it to actually break. What a load of bullshit! He wasn’t even that fat!

He looked around at the splintered wood, soreness radiating across his ass—and not in a fun, post-fucking kind of way. At least his buttocks were nicely-padded. When he was bony, a slip on the ice hurt like all hell.

He was glad he was alone, or this would have been super embarrassing. At least no one was around to see him smash that chair like a pro-wrestler in a grudge match. He knew he’d been overdoing it, but this wasn’t his fault. How could it be, surely he wasn’t that big? Just a little out of shape, in need of a few good workouts to shed some winter weight. It was just the cheap IKEA furniture he bought.

With a grunt, he started the process of heaving his monumental form to a stand. As he started to gather his momentum, he glanced at the ruined seat and frowned. He actually liked that chair. It was pretty comfortable.

At least, it used to be.

(Author’s Note: don’t forget to rotate your dining chairs!)

[reiniesainyo]

IN BETWEEN. charlie bushnell x reader – 01

01 | SPARKS FLY previous | next | masterfile

SYNPOSIS. when a girl's co-star is good to her and now she wants it more than everything in between. (smau)

A/N. this chapter is more like world building (it's where i explain what the fuck i'm doing with the YN okay)

The "Percy Jackson and the Olympians" series at Disney+ has added an unexpected pick to its growing cast.

The new live-action series is based on the hugely successful novels from author Rick Riordan of the same title. We will be seeing YN LN join the series as Rina Velasco, one of the supporting characters of the show.

LN's Rina Velasco is referred to as "the offspring of The Muses, goddesses of the sciences and the arts." Unlike most other demigods, she is born out of the artistic and scientific output of the muses. When the moral ingenuity of humans meets the divine musings of The Muses. Her character is described as a unique allrounder who becomes a mentor figure to our main cast as they embark on their journey.

This will be LN's first on-screen role of her career. LN's experience mostly lies in Broadway, she is known for playing Kim in the Miss Saigon revival on Broadway. LN was nominated for a Tony in 2022 for the same role. She is repped by Salonga/Chien Entertainment and B817 Agency.

Riordan posted on the Meta app, Threads, about this update to the casting saying: "YN was one of the actors we didn't expect to see a tape of but when we saw it, we couldn't help but fall in love with her. She embodies the spirit of Rina so well and is such a kind spirit, we can't wait for you to fall in love with her too! Welcome to the cast, YN!"

The live-action show is based on Rick Riordan's Percy Jackson book series. It tells the fantastical tale of the titular 12-year-old modern demigod (Scobell), who's just coming to terms with his newfound supernatural powers when the sky god Zeus accuses him of stealing his master lightning bolt. With help from his friends Grover (Simhadri) and Annabeth (Jeffries), Percy must embark on an adventure of a lifetime to find it and restore order to Olympus.

Production on the show is now underway in Vancouver. Riordan and Jon Steinberg are writing the pilot with James Bobin directing. Steinberg and his producing partner Dan Shotz are overseeing the series and serve as executive producers alongside Bobin, Rick Riordan, Rebecca Riordan, Bert Salke, Monica Owusu-Breen, Jim Rowe, Anders Engström, Jet Wilkinson, and Gotham Group's Ellen Goldsmith-Vein, Jeremy Bell, and D.J. Goldberg. 20th Television is the studio. Salke was formerly the president of Touchstone Television and originally put the show into development.

liked by percyseries, iamcharliebushnell, and 37,789 others thelnarchive the child of the muses @percyseries

percyseries OUR MUSE!

user1 this is literally perfect casting who cried i did ↳ user2 she's so rina coded! thank the gods for the casting directors

iamcharliebushnell only muse in my life ↳ thlnarchive only traveler in my life ↳ user3 the way filming hasn't started and they're already like this ↳ user4 their chemistry is chemistry-ing

user5 roman empire. she is my roman empire.

dior.n.goodjohn i LOVE LOVE LOVE women ↳ thelnarchive HELP i love you

user6 this is so fcking random but i NEED her in a taylor swift music video

A/N i truly hope you guys can forgive the horrible editing in the pictures. the article portion is based on (and has some parts that are directly pulled from) this article from variety ! here's some succint information about rina velasco, the PJO character YN LN plays (and is my childhood OC!) - rina velasco, filipino, 18 years old (year younger than luke) - she's an offspring of the muses, not directly a child or daughter, though she may be referred as such - by her being an offspring of the muses, i mean that she was born in the same way athena's children are born. - but in rina's case she's more like a weird conglomeration of each muse. her birth is a rare event, but her mothers are honored as minor goddesses so she stayed in the apollo cabin (connection to music) - rina operates as a guidance figure for the main trio, especially annabeth - she's also luke's love interest, there's a lot of tragicness and doomed romance stuff with those two - and for the sake of everyone, we pretend like the weird i love you from the books didn't happen !

[felixora]

"Anders as Spirit of Freedom" DA concept

Original idea

A DISCLAIMER

Every one of you who'll bear with me and read this till the end — I love you, you're precious to me, thank you.

And this is NOT canon, simply my fan work.

(Also there's more new art in this post)

Now back to the topic

This idea was born from:

a question "If a spirit can become mortal, can a mortal become a spirit?"

and another concept that "connection to the Fade is like a bridge with a door that everyone has, but only mages can open" Ordinary people cannot open the door. Mages can open said door and enter the Fade. Ordinary tranquility puts a wall instead of a door (which can be reversed) And tranquility from Red Templars breaks the fcking bridge all together.

We all know that Anders escapes Kirkwall (if he's alive) and for some time travels with mages before leaving them due to animosity. Well, in this concept he goes on the run, hiding from the Seekers, templars, anyone who wants him dead.

This goes for a couple of years. The Breach happens, Ancient Magister comes and falls, Inquisition triumphs. And Anders is still on the run. Until one day his luck runs off. He was hiding in a small mountain village, when a squad of Red Templars came by, trying to force villagers to work in lyrium mines.

Some men tried to fight back and chaos ensued, during which Anders considered running away once again. But, as he was stealthily leaving the village, Anders noticed a group of villagers trying to run away, while being pursued by Templars.

Impulsively, Anders made an effort to divert attention from the running villagers, but as a result, he was captured himself. A few of the Templars were from Kirkwall, and they recognized Anders from that fateful day in the city.

Instead of killing the mage they decided to punish him in a different way – by making him tranquil and leaving him by their side in servitude. And neither Anders nor Justice could do anything against it at the time. And so, Anders was completely cut off from the emotional side of the world and Justice became trapped inside him.

While all of that was going on – someone was also looking for Anders.

An ancient elven being, Libera, the last Spirit of Freedom (though bound to mortality and broken by Ghilan'nain) woke up from her slumber thanks to a happy coincidence that was the Kirkwall appraising — Anders' scream for liberation.

And she searched for the one who screamed in this new world, on her travels recruiting mage students to pass on her teachings and involve them in her goals of freeing her own people. Until a long year after Anders was captured, she finally found him.

After dealing with all the Red Templars, she and her students approached the few Tranquil mages, and Libera knew it was Anders when she saw him. She called out to Justice, who were woke up to her presence, and asked if they want to make things right for Anders – to do him justice

And the spirit agreed. Libera took the spirit from Anders and broke it into pure energy that she then used to rebuild Anders’ connection to the Fade. And just as that, Anders returned to himself and Justice was no more.

However, nothing was well and done. When Anders came to his senses in the camp of his saviours, he was distraught by the loss of his friend, especially when he learned that it was to save his life.

Memories of yearlong torment by Templars were flowing into his head, making him relive it now with full understanding of what had happened. Not to mention the overwhelming guilt over events in Kirkwall and mage uprising that he now felt full force without Justice.

And through it all, Libera was by his side, helping him to slowly get back on his feet and fight the pain of the past years.

She had her own motives, of course. Now Anders carried spiritual energy, making him part spirit with a possibility of more. A perfect vessel to be moulded into a Spirit of Freedom. But for that, the mage needed to let go of the pain and willingly step on this spiritual path.

So, Libera took Anders in as her student, helping him to deal with his trauma and guilt, while teaching him and others magic. She showed him how to reverse tranquility with his affinity to spirit magic, how to traverse the Fade as a spirit and inspire desire for freedom in others

While Libera helped Anders to make him a full-fledged spirit, others (like Varrick, Fenris, other students in Libera’s circle) helped him find purpose and will to live as a mortal. To make him remember all the good he brought in the lives of so many, not just pain and suffering.

.

.

. Anyone who will call me out on putting Anders through more trauma and literal hell — is absolutely right, and I have no objections. Still love him though.

[blaithnne]

I think my one complaint about Anders is that I wish we’d seen him leave of his own accord at least once. Unfortunately I doubt that would be possible due to time constraints but, I think if we’d gotten to see how Hilda was affected by him actually leaving and not being fairynapped it would have better shown what kind of person he is, and been a really good representation of what a lot of real kids go through. That moment where Hilda finally realised her Father abandoned her is so heartbreaking, raw, and real, and the fact that it’s later revealed he didn’t kind of undermines that.

I’m not against Anders changing for the better - it’s a kids show, and it makes sense they’d want to give him a character arch instead of just introducing him to be a dick lol. It also makes sense for his character to have nearly losing his entire family forever be a wake up call for him. But I wish we’d gotten more time with him, and really seen the effects of him leaving for real. Without that, we can generally assume that it had the same effect as him being kidnapped did in canon, but it’s just not the same.

I’m of the opinion that introducing Hilda’s dad as a concept was a good decision, and I don’t think it undermines the shows found family. It gives Hilda a relatable and realistic aspect to her that I think is important for kids in similar situations to see. I am, however, very biased in that regard.

My biological father was an asshole who fucked off before I was born, but I’ve had no absence of family or fatherly role models - I’m very close with my adoptive dad and my grandad. But that didn’t mean I never had questions, or insecurities.

It’s easy to look at fictional tropes and say that found family is clearly superior and biology doesn’t mean shit, and that’s true! But when you’re living in that reality, when you’re young and coming to terms with it for the first time, it’s hard. Especially when you’re surrounded by people who all have blood relations with their families, and when the person you’re related to is regarded as a dick. it really makes you feel isolated and like there’s something wrong with you, like you’re an outsider — you’re different.

Real life people are messy and have insecurities that defy reason, you might logically know that biology doesn’t matter, but when you’re thirteen and insecure and full of inner turmoil, you can’t help but feel bad.

Personally, as I got older, I met people in similar situations and realised I wasn’t alone, that it was okay to have those feelings but it didn’t make them true. But at that age, having grown up in a rural community, I really was alone.

Hilda’s insecurities in season 3 are a great representation of that, she feels like she’s never had a proper family, this thing with Frida, David, Tontu, Alfur and Johanna and Astrid is all new to her. You can tell her Father’s absence has hurt her, how she’s felt different and alone and like something was missing. Hilda defines her worth through her relationships with others, how she can help them make them happy, it destroyed her when she felt like she failed Frida, imagine how she feels about her father.

What I think season 3 was missing was for Hilda to realise that she doesn’t need Anders, and that her happiness isn’t reliant on him being there, I wish she’d had a tad more agency in the relationship, yk? She wants him to be in her life, and he’s going to make an effort now to do that, but she has a support system in place and will be perfectly fine without him. I wish the show had properly acknowledged that just because this is how things ended up, it wasn’t the only option — with or without Anders, Hilda would still have been happy with her family in the end, the fact that he’s a part of it is a nice bonus, but not an essential one.

In general, I think Anders is the best they could do with the time they were given. Having him be a realistic shitty dad who loves his daughter but is just so bad at it is relatable and realistic, though I wish they’d better emphasised that just because he loves hers that doesn’t make his actions okay (perhaps by slightly altering Johanna’s moment with Hilda at the end of The Job), because it’s clear, I think, as a diehard fan, but might not be for more casual viewers.

Having him be redeemable and stick around to do better is a good conclusion for his arch, it’s a happy ending all around and makes sense for the story - it could’ve been weird if they just had him show up and then immediately leave with zero resolution to his character, unless they made him an all out irredeemable abuser, which I think would’ve been worse than what we got. Portraying abusers as unforgivable and cartoonish villains only makes it harder for real life victims to recognise their situations, so if it couldn’t be portrayed properly (which thanks to time constraints and the overall narrative I don’t believe it could be) I’m glad they went with something else.

What we’ve got is, and I know I’ve said this many times lol, a realistic depiction of a crappy, absentee father, that young viewers can recognise and relate to. On that end, the biggest issues are Hilda’s lack of agency within their storyline, since she has no control in the resolution of their relationship, young people looking to this show for ways to cope with their own situations might be discouraged by the end resolution of “he decided to stick around”, since that resolution rests on his decision, not Hilda’s, if that makes sense.

TLDR; Overall, I think Anders’ was a good character and the best that could’ve been done with what the team was given, but,

A) I wish we’d gotten to see him leave of his own accord at least once, so that Hilda’s final realisation that he left her on purpose has more impact and doesn’t loose its meaning in retrospect, and,

B) That Hilda had more agency in the final resolution of their dynamic, that their happily ever after wasn’t entirely reliant on Anders swearing he won’t leave. An alternative solution, maybe presented earlier on in the season when he first left, that provided her with a coping mechanism/outlet in case he does, so that her happiness and mental health isn’t in his hands, would’ve been pretty neat.

[resident-problem]

Maybe spirits are the strongest emotion/ideal you exemplified or needed during your life? Andrastians believe that souls cross through the Fade when you die and that you can't come back, so maybe they're partially right in that you become a spirit, so utterly changed that you are no longer recognizable (I can't remember as well if there's a concept of being washed in the waters of the Fade, similar to Lethe, but that'd work too)? I re-played Cole's quest recently and it got me thinking that it was possibly part of what happened when the "real" Cole died.

It seems as well, that during a lot of characters journeys into the Fade they are being tested and finding out who they truly are and what they exemplify. Like in Origins for example, where (in my opinion, and from what I've played) you seem to portray hope even in the darkest hours, Cole becoming Compassion to ensure no one else was left without it, there's also something here about Solas being exemplified by a Pride demon as well, but I can't put my finger on it. Maybe that's just how things were for the elven people before the Veil? Where the Spirit and the person weren't seperate, but were one being?

It would also stand to reason that demons are those who either can't find peace, are corrupted spirits, or were already corrupt when they died. Maybe it was a case of demons never existing until a certain event happened and then it spread like a disease. Be it the creation of the Veil, something to do with the Void, or something else entirely, but something possibly provoked a shift in the spirits.

**EDIT** Thank you to @iceta for reminding me that Down Among the Dead Men exists!! I re-read it, and I have some thoughts.

There seem to be roughly two categories of this phenomenon: One is that you're truly dead like Karn and Audric and it's your corpse that's possessed, and the other is right before you die, the spirit inhabits your body. Some tentative examples would be Wynne, Anders (although I haven't played the DLC, so this is just what I read on his wiki page), Cole, and these are out there, but I'd also categorise Lucanis — from what I've seen in the QnA with the devs, specifically the line where someone decided to make the "Demon" part of the Demon of Vyrantium more permanent — and Solas, but that's hinged on my ancient elf theory from earlier. Could also make an argument about the Evanuris being the first demons (something about their useage of power being so against a spirit's nature that it corrupted them), but I don't have enough evidence to prove it either way.

[hungee-boy]

Feel free to ignore if you’re uncomfortable with or just don’t want to answer but how would you change isebela to not be caricature without changing the whole character? Would it be more fashion changes or physical or something else?

Kinda like: how would you change her if you were her character writer/designer for the new game?

isabela at her core i think is a very compelling character and is relatable to a lot of romani experiences, especially with her doing whatever she has to to survive

i would definitely keep her stealing as castillion's responsibility, him making her steal the tome of koslun under threat of death for example would be fine because if he wasnt in the picture, chances are she wouldnt have stolen it in the first place

other forms of thievery besides just like looting bodies and picking chests (as those are gameplay mechanics for all characters) shouldnt be for her enjoyment or greed, only for her survival or just not done at all

her staying a pirate is fine imo and i like the idea of her being an ethical pirate (like her freeing the slaves castillion had her transport) but we all need to look at how pirates are depicted in fantasy and how much of that is anti-roma racism and caricatures

her being so sexualized and her comments on "life back home" are where i have the biggest issues honestly

like romani women have always been targets of fetishization and sexual violence, as well as many women being sterilized without consent to prevent more romani children being brought into the world

getting some damn clothes on her would be a great start, like some pants at the very least. i would like to incorporate more romani clothing in her design tho like maybe a traditional blouse instead of her usual top

maybe a romanced isabela can have her replace her blue dikhlo with red, since wearing a dikhlo is usually reserved for married women of certain vitsas (most common with eastern european roma if im not mistaken) or giving her a red hipcloth (again specific to certain vitsas)

romani dress is usually modest and loose fitting, with women commonly wearing long skirts and blouses with jewelry and adornments to symbolize her wealth and status and im not saying isabela should be covered head to toe, shes an open person and not every romani woman should be expected to dress one way over another, its just her look is way too impractical for the sake of being sexy and again romani women are very often sexualized regardless of what they wear

isabela's attitude towards sex and being open to intimacy is not an issue on its own, what is the issue is how the writers make fucking jokes of her sexuality at every chance they get (like the std joke in anders' clinic, aveline's slut shaming, etc. etc. etc.....) and this is just my personal opinion but there are times that she comes on too strong to like hawke or carver or fenris that seems unrealistic and just like an attempt for the writers to further hone in on how horny shes supposed to make you feel

like yes have her be open and not ashamed of being intimate but put more love and respect on it. i love an isabela that is repressed in her own feelings and the only way she knows how to have meaningful connections is through sex cus thats what was expected of her. like oh my god do you know how many people relate to that, if its done right it could be a very compelling arch to her character and maybe something she learns isnt concrete the more platonic/romantic meaningful time she has with everyone in da2 and beyond

as for her comments about rivain and the people there, like the phrase "even deny a fortune teller and theyll run you out of town" to merrill, just makes rivainis out to be greedy and shameless swindlers and that projection is obviously also put on romani people since that is a VERY common stereotype

like the phrase "getting gypped" literally means to be cheated and comes from the word gypsy. theres no denying the intention the writers had when they wrote that line for isabela

and honestly i love the idea of rivain (i say the idea cus we only hear accounts of the nation, we havent seen it in person yet) i love the idea of a matriarchal society that is religious and spiritual but does not tolerate the chantry's bigotry and openly accepts society's outcast such as mages and qunari

romani culture irl is patriarchal and often anybody who is not romani is typically not trusted, but if rivain was treated as an idealistic fantasy romanistan, where our values and traditions are implemented and we make a better world for ourselves and other outcasts then it could be very compelling

thats the thing with representation, sometimes it doesnt have to reflect reality 100%, but it still requires knowledge so that you can make new ideas based on the facts and reasoning of the group youre representing

[eivor-wolfkissed]

Replaying dragon age now that I'm older- I've actually changed my opinions about Anders a lot and honestly? I *hate* Anders. There are certain things about his character I do like, and I like the tragedy of it all. But honestly I'm just not the biggest fan of him anymore. I think he's a good example of a bad activist who ends up hurting others more than enacting good change. He's more of a selfish accelerationist, rather than someone who listens to the people and fights for change that actually benefits them, but in the long run, his actions end up hurting mages even more in my opinion. He was a better person before he ended up getting jaded and possessed by Justice, then later, Vengance.

I think another thing that fueled my dislike of him is watching his hardcore fans do terrible things on here to other people (like watching some of his chronically online white fans accuse people of color within fandom of supporting police brutality just because they liked certain characters or held nuanced opinions about the templar/mage stuff, and misgender/exclude trans fans from queer fandom spaces for the same reasons stated above, to name a few things). All of these things combined have lead me to just be extremely annoyed by Anders overall. Not to mention his dick behavior towards other companions- like supporting Hawke selling Fenris into slavery, while pretending to be a freedom fighter? Lmao. Cringeworthy. Anders is not a morally good character by any means. For the things I do like- I do always side with the mages in DA2, and I fully support the actions taken to help mages escape the Kirkwall circle specifically. I really enjoyed doing the side quests with the mage underground. I love Anders' refusal to be caged and his determination to live freely (just wish he respected that in others and didn't support selling Fenris into slavery simply because he didn't agree with him. That's beyond selfish and straight up diabolical. Again, another thing that reminds me of IRL white leftists who refuse to deconstruct their bigotry). I just think the final action of destroying the chantry only invited chaos and didn't actually help mages at all (see the violence in DAI and how many innocent less powerful mages get killed by mobs of non mages because they no longer have protection. The circles needed a lot of changes but ripping them away completely and suddenly left a vacuum and invited way too much chaos imo).

And to be clear, this isn't a post with intent to shame all Anders fans. Not all of his fans act in the way I outlined earlier- just a particular, small but loud subset of them I have observed up close and interacted with one on one in the past. I don't think it's wrong to like this character at all- it's silly to claim that someone is morally wrong for liking a fictional character. There are things I still enjoy about his character! However growing up, getting a little wiser about activism, and watching *some* (not all) of his fans act like genuine bigots towards other dragon age fans, have made me lose more and more enthusiasm for him overall. It's also extrordinarily tiring to watch extremely sheltered and privileged people who have never witnessed acts of mass violence say that his final act of blowing up a church is Good and Moral when in actuality, it ended up murdering people who had nothing to do with the conflict. I do firmly believe that people who are gung ho about that action have a very idealized view of violence and do not actually comprehend how horrific and traumatizing these acts are on societies as a whole. It only ends up hurting the most vulnerable people and does nothing but invite violent chaos. I will fully admit I used to be one of those people, until I actually talked with and listened to real life refugees and other people who have experienced acts of terrorism and violent revolution in their respective home countries. These things always impact the most vulnerable members of society in horrific ways, and never actually holds people in power responsible... and all too often, pushes societies into even more authoritarianism.

Anyways. That's my essay on why Anders now annoys me greatly as an adult fan and why I veiw him more as a tragically doomed character rather than a freedom fighter. Anders, to me, is a terrorist in it for him and his. Not a freedom fighter. Everything stated here is my personal opinion- I'm not interested in debating people on my post, only sharing what I now think of this character- any kind of combative harassment added to this post will be ignored, blocked, and deleted.

It will be interesting to see what happens after I post this. If this post upsets you, please ignore it and do something healthy with your emotions, please do not engage in bullying.

[the-cryptographer]

Getting a fair amount of scepticism from respondants about whether Anders was intentionally trying to hurt and embarrass Fenris in the suicidal ideation banter or making a clumsy but entirely unmalicious attempt to connect. And realising I don't feel *that* strongly about it. At least not regarding this banter specifically.

Anders has, since his very first meeting with Fenris, been not so secretly trying to convert Fenris to his political side and claim mutual solidarity with him as a fellow former slave. Which Fenris is not having for a number of entirely reasonable reasons. Which are not entirely relevant to my point but I'll summarise them here anyhow.

First, it's not in Fenris's material interests to side with Anders and lose the protections he gets by conforming with the mainstream Southern Andrastian narrative (as offered by people like Sebastian and Aveline and Hawke) by which magic and mages are tightly controlled by the state and Fenris is a clear and uncomplicated victim of foreign magical Tevinter wickedness.

Second, Anders is a human who feels at all times entitled to Fenris's attention and emotional support, and thinks nothing of turning aggressive when Fenris denies him. So therefore not someone who is in Fenris's mind altogether different from the other entitled humans he has known. (Except for the fact that Fenris is able to loudly and unrepentantly tell him to fuck off, in a way he won't risk with someone like Sebastian or Hawke or Danarius.)

So, in my mind at least, wanting connection with Fenris is absolutely a reason Anders starts this and most conversations with Fenris. And it does at time blur the lines about how much any particular dialogue is 'unmalicious but awkward' versus 'a direct attempt to hurt and embarrass Fenris'. (Which I am not altogether as judgemental about as I think some people are reading me as. Anders's behaviour is inappropriate, but his need for visceral emotional feedback from people - where positive feedback is prefered to negative feedback is prefered to no feedback at all - is entirely sympathetic to me, especially coming from someone who has been tortured via solitary confinement.)

So this all kind of made me reach for a time where I think Anders's sadism is more directly captured:

Yes, it is important to note that this did start with Fenris needling Anders instead of the other way around. And it is also important to note how much more pointed Anders's response is when Fenris and Hawke are romantically entangled. I'll get back to that latter point further on, but in general I'm not trying to have a discussion about how justified any of these characters are in aggressing one another. What's important here is I do think this banter provides a pretty direct look at the running theme into the argument Anders weaponises to hurt and embarrass Fenris - the direct comparison between Fenris's relationships with his family and Danarius and Hawke - and that this tactic absolutely worked going by how quickly and totally it shut Fenris up.

I think Anders is in a particular position to both notice and assign significance to some of the gaps between Fenris's stories & projected identity, and the Southern Andrastian characterisation of Tevinter slaves as mirthless weaklings, unilaterally battered and victimised by magic, and without an agentive bone in their body. Which is to say I think Anders is all too aware of the fact that social heirarchy between slaves is often very complex and fraught with internal conflict and violence, and that Fenris was far more of an Irving than an Evelina in the way he carried himself in his practical life in Tevinter. Fenris was Danarius's bodyguard and enforcer. He was directly empowered by Danarius to act in that role, not only against Danarius's rival senators and political enemies, but against Danarius's other slaves. And the demands and accolades of this position came with protections Fenris was actively courting from Danarius; Fenris was at lower risk for being maimed, starved, chosen for blood sacrifice, or placed in solitary confinement than many of his peers (although there were other violences he was at higher risk of - ones less relatable to Anders). And Fenris is now seeking many of the same protections from Hawke that Danarius himself used to fulfill.

I think my favourite illustration of this is this banter between Fenris and Sebastian:

Fenris relays a story about witnessing Danarius kill a boy during a party to fuel his blood magic. Fenris carefully omits what *he* was doing while this occurred. But I think anyone asking the question is liable to see he was, at best, standing to the side, pouring wine, and doing nothing as he watched it happen. At worst, he helped Danarius restrain and kill the child himself.

Now it would of course be unconscionably cruel for Sebastian or Hawke to hold what Fenris did under durress, merely to safeguard his own survival, against him. Not in the least because Sebastian has no experience with this type of exploitation, and Hawke's far briefer stint as an indentured labourer, as a mercenary or smuggler, was fraught with the same kind of violences against their peers.

But I think Anders can't help but notice that this wholly unsceptical benefit of the doubt is never quite extended to Circle mages who, like Fenris, have had to resort to violence against those less-favoured than them in order to safeguard their own interests within an abusive and exploitative system of slave labour. (At least not in Southern Thedas. I'm sure that there are plenty of Sebastians in Tevinter pearl clutching about how barbaric and cruel the Southern Circles are without ever quite looking their own human rights violations in the eye.) And I think this becomes the biggest source of his resentment towards Fenris.

Now I've said before one of the things I like about Anders is that he is unequivocating in terms of the fact that slavery is bad, and the circles are bad. He doesn't waste time worrying about the Irvings of the world also benefiting from his goals of emancipation, even if he hates them personally. And I do think this extends to Fenris in many ways and is why Anders can see the benefit and possibility of seeking solidarity with Fenris (even if it doesn't work for the reasons stated above).

But at the same time, this resentment of Fenris and of how Fenris is percieved by Hawke and Aveline and Sebastian (I think Varric is alone insofar as Anders's aquaintences with the Kirkwall-powers-that-be that see Anders as more the victim of Fenris's ill-temper than vice versa, although Varric remains terribly equivocating about Anders's condemnation of the Circle itself) ultimately comes through in a lot of Anders's dialogues with Fenris. All the moreso when he feels Hawke is taking sides with Fenris against him via the romance. But even the less pointed non-romance banters are imho trying to poke holes in Fenris's stories. They're part of a larger attempt to expose Fenris to Hawke and the others as far more violent, and far less innocent victim, than the South's image of the Tevinter slave allows. And to point out that Fenris readily takes advantage of that image to his benefit, even though he knows he does not fit its mould. Which I have a hard time saying isn't an attempt to hurt or embarrass or defame Fenris, when Anders knows he is attacking Fenris's honestly extremely shakey support network and the only protection Fenris has against his old master's bounty hunters. Even if I think what Anders really wants is for Hawke et al. to extend him the same moral support that they more effortlessly show Fenris, rather than strictly to bring Fenris down to his level of insecurity.

[whumpty-dumpty-doo]

Whumpmas in July 2024 - Day 7 - Post a link to your favorite whump fic of all time!

This post is part of my participation in the 2024 @whumpmasinjuly event!

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Ah, it's hard to pick a favorite! Here are a few that I really enjoyed:

Gallery AU (Keith and Shiro from VLD fanfic) by @trytofocus - Keith is a prisoner in a secret, highly prestigious gallery where subjects are displayed in all manners of artful bondage for the entertainment of rich patrons. Shiro is one such patron. And he isn't nice. (Be warned that this fic is 18+, as it contains adult elements and themes, and is NSFW) Why I love it: God, the mental images are SO GOOD. The way that Keith is treated as a living, breathing, unwilling art piece... the emotions, the way things are described, the care and reverence taken in tying him up and putting him on display, the way that Shiro appreciates him, the attitude that Keith gives... It's so freaking good, and it gives me crazy whumperflies. I wish there was more!

Death Valley (also on AO3) by @ashintheairlikesnow - In 2003, Finn Schneider left Germany for a month-long planned trip around the United States. Somewhere around Death Valley, he disappeared. But he wasn't alone. (Be warned that this fic is 18+, as it contains noncon, murder, and is NSFW) Why I love it: This was the second whump fic that I ever read, and it was integral in getting me into the whumpsphere! I feel SO SO SO bad for Finn, what he goes through, and how he is in his future. It's one of those stories that makes me go "OH NO BB LET ME FIX IT FOR YOU ;A;" but this poor guy has seen and been through far too much. It's brutal. Even the flash forward has me on the edge of my seat and only wanting the best for him. I hope this poor man finds love, joy, and peace.

Brother's Keeper by @darkthingshappen - Ben Adkins' life changes forever when his brother Jake fails to pay what is owed to some powerful men. Will he be able to survive his harrowing experience and return to his family? (Be warned that this fic is 18+, as it contains explicit noncon and is NSFW) Why I love it: Phew, this one is intense! It's one of those fics that made me go "OH DAMN." a lot. I actually had to read this one out of order a bit because (spoilers) thereʻs a recovery arc... followed by a recapture arc. I had to save some of the recovery arc to read when things got too tough and I needed some joy for the characters, because GEEZ. Poor Ben!! Poor Jake! Poor Andrei! Volkov and his guys are sick SOBs and just merciless. Itʻs so whumpy. I had to skip a chapter or two due to some of my own personal squicks, but other than that, if youʻre looking for some guys having a super bad time, this is a great fic for that!

King of The Road by @darkthingshappen - George and Danny find themselves in the hands of a very sick and twisted trucker. What will happen to them as his newest victims? (Be warned that this is fic 18+, as it contains explicit noncon and is NSFW) Why I love it: The trucker is horrible!! An absolutely evil vile terrible sick guy!!! I have to know what happens to George and Danny! Thereʻs not much of the fic yet, but Iʻm frothing at the mouth waiting for more. The brutality is so whumperiffic, and I already desperately want to save them, so you know things are on a good track!

Secrecy by @doomeddestination - A young spy is captured by a mysterious man known only as Shepard. (Be warned that this fic is 18+, as it contains explicit noncon and is NSFW) Why I love it: Calico is such a great writer, and her dedication to her stories and characters is INSANE. This story was the first one of hers that I read, and it introduced me to Ander, who is another character that I simply wish to wrap in a blanket and give tea to and take care of forever. This poor guy just needs a break. Shepard is awful, and the suspense in the story is so great. Thereʻs a whole multitude of AUs and stories that contain these characters as well, so lots of stuff to check out! ... ... ... If Ander never gets to canonically see his mom again, I will riot in the streets. LET A GOOD THING HAPPEN TO HIM.

The Mountain Man by @darkthingshappen - A kidnapper has his sights on a hockey player and sets a plan into motion to get him into his clutches. Why I love it: Getting into the head of the whumper as he stalked and planed his capture was so cool. I loved the confusion and delirium that the hockey player showed, especially when things started to get scary. I think this story was meant to be a one-shot, but Iʻd gladly dig into more of it if it got continued!

Hazel's story by @starrywhump - A group of college students is kidnapped by a sadistic whumper who has no qualms about torturing them. Why I love it: This was the FIRST whump fic I ever found and read! I wouldnʻt be in the community now if not for this fic. I have no idea how I stumbled across it, but Iʻm so glad I did, because it introduced me to whump lingo, whump blogs, and this whole crazy world. I love the characters, the whumper is creepy and intimate, and some of what she does is just nasty and brutal. I donʻt know what happened to the author (the blog hasnʻt been updated in like three years), but I hope that theyʻre happy and doing well wherever they are. I love the fic, and would love to read more if they ever decided to continue!

There are so so so many other great fics out there, but these are just the few that come to mind off the top of my head! Any other fans of these stories out there? :O

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Tags: @whumpmasinjuly-archive

[yourforgottenbookshelf]

Caught In The Middle - Valerio Montesinos x Muñoz!Reader

Gif not mine. Credits to the rightful owner.

Fandom: Elite

Pairing and other characters mentioned: Valerio Montesinos x Reader, Ander Munoz x Reader, Guzman Nunier, Lu Montesinos, Samuel Garcia, Carla Roson, Cayetana Grajera, Omar Shanaa

Summary: You are Ander's twin sister and have recently started dating Valerio. However, Ander doesn't approve of your relationship, and when an incident takes place during a party, he warns Valerio to stay away from you. {Requested}

Word count: 1781

Trigger warning: alcohol and substance abuse, attempted sa, violence, cursing

A/N: I'm noticing a lack of Elite fanfiction here on Tumblr, which I'm not very happy about. Please, feel free to send in requests, my loves.

“Out of all the boys in Las Encinas, you really had to sleep with this degenerate,” your brother’s voice snapped you out of your thoughts. “Excuse me?” you questioned in disbelief. Normally, Ander would keep his opinions to himself- it wasn’t like him to intervene with your personal life- but it wasn’t like you to keep things from him either.

Ander took a deep breath. “When were you going to tell me?” he asked. You frowned, unsure of how you should respond. “Tell you what?” you replied, trying to buy yourself more time to think of an excuse.

Your twin rolled his eyes. “About you and Valerio. I had to find out from Omar, for God’s sake!”

You felt the blood on your face painting your cheeks red. It was obvious you couldn’t hide the truth from your brother any longer. “Look, cariño, I’m sorry,” you said softly. “I didn’t mean to keep it from you. I just didn’t know how to tell you.”

Ander’s expression softened. “Y/N, you’re my twin sister. You know you can always confide in me, right?”

“I know how much you dislike him,” you murmured. Ander picked up on the fact you avoided eye contact, and took a seat next to you on your bed. His wrapped his arm around your shoulder carefully, and pulled you closer to him.

“I don’t dislike Valerio,” he sighed, “I just don’t think he’s good for you.”

Ander had a valid point. Valerio had a reputation for being a troublemaker, and his involvement with drugs and partying was well-known around the school. Despite all that, you couldn’t help the way you felt about him.

“I understand what you’re saying, cariño,” you said, “but I just hope you can accept my choise.”

Ander took a deep breath before responding. “I will always support you, Y/N, no matter what. Just, promise me one thing.”

There was a moment of silence before he continued, during which you felt your heart pounding on your chest. “Promise me you’ll be careful, and that you’ll come to me if you ever need anything.”

You felt a wave of graditute wash over you as you hugged your brother tightly. “Thank you, Ander,” you breathed. “I promise.”

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

As you swallowed the sixth vodka shot, you felt like your soul was elevating heavenwards. The sweet taste of gummy bears mixed with alcohol burned your throat and made you feel euphoric- like the world was still there, but for the moment, it didn't have you by the throat.

“You’re breathtaking tonight, Y/N,” Valerio whispered, his lips brushing over your exposed collarbone. You giggled and tittled your head slightly to the side, placing a soft kiss on his neck. “I could say the same thing,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper.

As the alcohol continued to flow through your veins, you started to feel lightheaded. The room around you spun in dizzying circles, and you struggled to keep your balance. Valerio noticed your unsteady movements and reached out to steady you, his hand gripping your arm tightly.

“Y/N, you okay?” he questioned. Even though you couldn’t hear his voice clearly enough, you could see the concern etching on his face. You tried to nod, but the room spun even faster, and you felt like you might be sick.

“I don’t feel so good,” you mumbled, your words slurring together. Valerio’s grip on your arm tightened, and he led you to a nearby couch, sitting you down carefully.

“Hey, it’s okay,” he reassured you, kissing you softly on the forehead. “I’ll go get you some water.” And with that, he disappeared into the crowd.

A few moments went by, and your dizziness only got worse.

Suddenly, you felt a hand on your thigh, and you looked up to see a stranger leering at you. You tried to push him away, but your limbs felt heavy and uncooperative.

“Come with me, sweetheart,” he slurred, his breath hot and stale against your face. You tried to scream, but no sound came out, and the darkness swallowed you whole.

It didn’t take long for Valerio to return to the crowded living room, clutching a bottle of water in his hand. He searched for you in the sea of faces, and when he realized you were nowhere to be seen, he felt his heart skip a beat. As panic set in, he scanned the room once again. He spotted Samuel and Guzman chatting in a corner, and quickly approached them.

“Guys, have you seen Y/N?” he asked with a slightly shaken voice.

Guzman and Samuel exhanged a puzzled glance. “No, we haven’t seen her. Why?” Samuel replied. Valerio felt his heart sinking to his stomach, and his eyes darted the room for familiar faces one more time. He didn’t bother replying to Samuel before rushing to Lu and Carla.

“Lu, have you seen Y/N? I can’t find her anywhere.”

Lu shook her head. “No, sorry. We've been dancing together for the past hour.”

Valerio’s concern slowly evolved into fear. His mind conjured up horrifying scenarios, and he couldn’t shake the feeling that he had failed to protect you.

“Val, what’s going on?” Lu questioned, visibly concerned.

Valerio took a deep breath, trying to compose himself before explaining the situation. “It’s all my fault,” he murmured, the words weighing heavy on his chest.

“What’s going on?” asked Guzman, arriving at the scene along with Samuel, drawn in by the commotion.

“We can’t find Y/N,” Carla spoke up. The sense of urgency in her voice was palpable.

Guzman’s expression remained stoic as he tried to assess the situation. “Have you tried calling her?” he asked Valerio.

“I did just now. It’s going straight to voicemail,” Lu interjected.

Guzman's mind raced as he tried to piece together what had happened. "Vale. Where's Ander and Omar?" he questioned, his tone serious and firm. “They went to get some drinks, they should be back any minute now.”

“We have to split up and search for her. She must be somewhere in the house,” Carla said, taking charge of the situation. “I’m texting Ander to check the pool and the back yard. Me and Lu will go see if her car is still in the driveway, and you guys head upstairs.”

The group nodded in agreement, and quickly dispersed to search for any signs of you.

Guilt washed over Valerio in waves, threatening to drown him as he imagined the worst. He mentally cursed himself for ever letting you out of his sight, for not being more careful, for not protecting you like he should have.

“Cayetana, have you seen Y/N?” Samuel asked, desperation creeping into his voice. “Si, I saw her and Gabriel going to the attic. She seemed a bit disoriented,” the blonde replied, taking a sip of her drink.

“What? Why didn't you say something earlier?" Guzman snapped, his anger rising at the thought of you being in danger.

"I didn't think anything of it," Cayetana replied defensively, sensing the tension in the air.

“Puta madre!”

Without another word, the three of them raced up to the attic, their hearts pounding in their chests. As they opened the door, they saw you huddled in the corner, shaking with fear. And there, hovering above you, was Gabriel, a sinister smile on his face.

"Ugh, merda. I was just starting to have some fun with your girlfriend."

Guzman and Samuel stepped forward, flanking Valerio on either side as they faced off against Gabriel. Valerio's eyes flashed with anger as he noticed your bruised arms and bloodied shirt. "What the fuck did you do to her, cabron?" he growled, his voice low and menacing.

“I didn’t-” Gabriel didn’t get a chance to reply, as Guzman’s chuckles met with his mouth. “You are gonna pay for this, joder!” he screamed. Gabriel’s feet stumbled, as he held his arms up in defense. “I swear, I didn’t do anything. I was just messing around.”

“Just messing around?” Valerio growled, feeling his blood boiling. “Valerio, por favor,” Samuel whispered, grabbing him before he had the chance to hit him as well. “She needs you.”

Meanwhile, you were still curled up in the corner, shaking violently. You tried resisting the urge to throw up, but the mix of alcohol and the metal taste of blood in your mouth weren’t much help. You cried out, in a desperate attemp to capture someone’s attention, but nobody seemed to had heard you.

You were well aware that Valerio and Guzman would never let Gabriel get away with this. The sounds of fists hitting flesh, the screams of your friends, and the shattering of glass all seemed to blend together into one sickening cacophony. Your heart was racing, and you felt like you were going to pass out any moment.

“Guzman, Valerio, eso es suficiente!” Lu screamed, hurriedly entering the attic. Carla, Ander, Omar and Cayetana followed close behind.

Ander and Carla wasted no time rushing next to you. “Y/N, what happened?” Carla asked. Her voice was slow and steady, but you could tell she was struggling to keep her composure.

You took a deep breath. The air, however, didn’t reach the bottom of your lungs. You felt like you were suffocating.

“Call an ambulance, now!” Ander demanded. And, for the second time tonight, darkness swallowed you.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“I don’t want you near my sister ever again. You've been nothing but trouble lately, and I don't want her getting caught in the middle of it."

Valerio took a final drag out of his cigarette. "What are you talking about? Tonight wasn’t my fault- I didn’t do anything wrong."

"Maybe not intentionally," Ander replied firmly, "but you've been a bad influence on her."

Valerio sighed. “I guess I don’t have much of a choice, do I? At the end of the day, you never liked me.”

Ander watched as Valerio walked down the hospital corridor, feeling hurt and confused. He had never meant to cause any harm to you, and he couldn’t deny that he felt a deep sense of loss now that he couldn't be near you anymore. He knew that Ander was only looking out for his sister, and he respected that. Maybe someday, you could all be friends again, but for now, he would have to stay away.

[agentshades]

A selection of things that my wife Kelsey has said while we play Baldur's Gate 3 together:

"They really need to think of a more menacing word than 'tadpole' if they're gonna keep reminding me there's a little guy in my brain."

---

*Astarion Appears*

Kelsey: "Ah yes, the Bisexual Gaze"

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*mentions never having seen a Githyanki before"

Lae'zel: "I expect I am your first."

Kelsey: "Her facial expression says she didn't phrase it like that by accident."

---

*Raphael Appears*

"Ah, man this guy has tool bag energy."

---

Kelsey: "So far everyone has been really mean to me except Gale. I like Gale." *starts a convo with Gale*

Gale: "Go to hell."

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"Whatever, ASTARION." (Frequently, anytime Astarion disapproves of her nice person behavior.)

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"I need you to know I wouldn't do this in real life, but I need Gale to like me."

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*Karlach appears*

"Ooh, Gale has competition..."

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Nettie: "Swear to me you'll take this wyvern poison if you feel yourself changing."

Kelsey, somehow standing on top of both a table and a dead Drow: "Well I was going to but then she poisoned me and now it just seems people-pleasy."

---

*after trying for the fifth time to talk to Astarion, who is in my party and refusing to talk to her*

Me: "I can kick him out of my party for a second and you can talk to him."

Kelsey: "No, he had his chance. You can keep him."

---

*Withers appears*

Kelsey: "What!? Why didn't the game let *me* be a rotting skeleton!?"

---

*Karlach starts running around trailing fire after we killed Anders*

Kelsey: "Watch out, she's got the zoomies."

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*Mizora appears*

Kesley, in nothing but a purple bra: "I suppose now would be a good time to figure out how to put my shirt back on."

[nanomooselet]

My Brother's Keeper (III)

So, what's the big difference between Knives and Wolfwood that leads to such disaster? Why, it's the same as the difference between Vash and Meryl. The one which meant Zazie singled out Meryl despite her relative powerlessness.

Agency.

And more than that.

Wolfwood has been forced to represent Knives. But he has far more in common with Vash - similarities which, unfortunately, extend to both being victims of Knives's abuse.

The Eye of Michael took Wolfwood from his home because he did well on a test he couldn't have consented to, chemically mutilated him, hurt him when he tried to escape, mocked and belittled him, and used Livio as a hostage to coerce him into being their hatchet-man. Now everything that was ever good in his world depends on him doing what they want, and he can't trust them to keep their word on that anymore.

Hell, Nick's place in the Hopeland Orphanage (earmarked as a storehouse for potential EOM subjects), being likely born S+ chemically compatible, even being orphaned young and poor (and thus being taken in by an orphanage) all meant he was denied a say in his future, long before he was even aware he had one. Almost every major event in his life has been dictated by things he couldn't control, and by now he's resigned to it, just as Vash is resigned to shouldering blame and punishment for everything that Knives does (supposedly) because of him. Wolfwood's been made into the Punisher, and the Punisher is a weapon. He is wielded by another, as Vash is himself often used and fought over.

When in the position of putting aside punishment to protect what they love most, Wolfwood discards his weapon/shield to take the agony of sacrifice upon himself, just as Vash has always done.

Knives, though... Okay. Fair warning. I've seen it said that Vash "maintains the status quo" while Knives "fights for the oppressed". Now, Knives really is one of my favourites; I wouldn't have examined him so closely if he wasn't. But I don't even remotely share that assessment of the situation.

(And if this seems an excessive amount of attempted placation, I can only say that I'm a long-term BioWare fan who frankly never liked or trusted Garrus Vakarian or Anders, so being skittish about voicing criticism of the fandom boyfriend has become a habit.)

Orange were far, far nicer than I would have been when they said Knives isn't a villain. Or rather, I think when they said they prefer "nuance and complexity" to boiling a character down to merely "villain", that was taken to be a much more positive description of Knives than they intended it to be. They did give Knives nuanced and complex motivations. But they do not mean he is truthful, objective, rational, or morally superior to his victims.

I don't think Knives is the blade and liberator of the downtrodden he names himself. Not even of the Plants. He's something more horrifying and more hateful.

Knives, you see, actively seeks out power. He's motivated above all by a desire for authority, superiority, dominance and control. There are a lot of shots where he stands above - particularly above Vash, who's often kneeling before him. His followers call him "lord". Conrad tells Legato they need forgiveness from Wolfwood, but the one he actually begs for it is Knives. That's exactly what Knives wants. It means he's strong.

To Knives, possessing power and being in power means he's right. He's safe. He can't be controlled as long as he is in control (he cannot be victim as long as he is perpetrator). He's the shadow ruler of the most powerful and wealthy of the seven cities, which practices eugenicist control of its population. He controls the July military police, who carry missile launchers, drive armoured vehicles, and are pointedly demonstrated to be both brutal and deeply corrupt. He steals (or "liberates from oppression") Plants from remote communities like Jeneora Rock, which even before he arrived had no clean drinking water, while July is explicitly described as having a "monopoly" on the sale and distribution of water-producing Plants (they also manufacture and sell weapons). He deliberately sows misinformation and lies to (among other things) persecute and exert control over his brother, who is thus branded a dangerous fugitive and subject to constant violence and pursuit. He founded a religion that glorifies death and preys upon even those like the Windmill Village, who didn't rely on Plants for anything and yet were driven away or slaughtered to the last.

After Knives crashed the ships, he took it on himself to build a new system. This one installed him in a position to exploit the disadvantaged and powerless, these disgusting parasites, for his own ends. All the while making plans to wipe them out - because as he conceptualises the world, it will make what he loves (what belongs to him) as safe and as pure and as perfect as himself. He made himself into a weapon that only he will ever wield. And he wields himself against those who have no way to meaningfully fight back, who have no way even to understand what it is that he so despises them for.

Knives never makes sacrifices. He demands them. Someone else always has to take the blame. Someone else always has to suffer the consequences. Often that someone is Vash, often it's the other Plants, often it's humans - and always it's Rem, even though Rem is dead and has been for a century and a half.

It can't be Knives. He's never to blame. Yet everything that Knives has become, he's chosen to be. Still he refuses to accept any responsibility or compromise, anything that might lead to him being vulnerable. Even as those he claims to protect are ruined as a result of his negligence and cruelty.

Not wanting to kill anyone… that's just a coward's idealism. Even a kid could tell you that. Folks only get to live 'cause other people die. That's the world we live in. I don't have the luxury of being afraid to make tough decisions. I have to choose in order to protect the things that are dear to me.

Very nice speech, beautifully staged and affecting (also though Wolfwood is delivering it to Vash, it's for the benefit of Meryl, as she checks the derringer is loaded, trying to keep her hands steady). But… what choice besides killing has there been for Wolfwood? He took Livio in as his brother and all that did was make Livio a target as well.

It was Vash who actually gave him a choice.

No, what's coming out of Wolfwood's mouth is dogma of the Eye of Michael. Wolfwood is doing what Knives would do, will do, has done from the very start and has spent every moment of his life furiously trying to justify ever since: paying in blood for the safety of him and his, telling himself it's the only way.

What makes Wolfwood different from Knives in this instance is that he actually bothered listening when Vash talked, then trusted him at least to try and do what he could. And that means the justification, for Wolfwood, is falling pitifully short. He owes everything to Vash's kindness. He knows Vash isn't naïve, or a coward, or childish, or weak. Vash embodies a hope he's never known before in his life, and Wolfwood can no longer convince himself surrendering to despair and complacency is the right thing to do. Not if there's a choice.

He doesn't believe there is one. Belief isn't for him. He's no priest. He's just an undertaker.

But given that, if that's what he is, then... maybe…

There's no way to return his humanity./That monster was not the kid you knew.

You don't, by any chance, think you can make up with Millions Knives, do you?/When you get to Knives, you aren't stupid enough to think you two can just talk this thing out, are ya?

Do you think sacrificing yourself will make everyone happy?/Think sacrificing yourself will make us little guys happy?

Wolfwood... Wolfwood knows. What Vash can't accept. What Knives really is. Has personally been subject to Knives's handiwork, been Knives's instrument going to and fro on the earth, and walking up and down in it. You know what? This time, Knives should be the one to make a sacrifice. After a lifetime of spouting bullshit and ruling absolute over a world that because of him, demands either sacrifice or death, it might finally be his turn. If Wolfwood can convince Vash to make him take it.

But of all the fucking times for Vash to dig in his fucking heels, of course it had to be over this.

(Part I)

(Part II)

(Part IV)

(Part V)

(Part VI)

(Part VII)

[yanderes-galore]

A John Forge (Halo) concept please!

I can try my hand at this, sure. He was a good character and had nice characterization as a marine.

Yandere! John Forge Concept

Pairing: Romantic/Platonic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Manipulation, Poor mental health, Violence, Mentions of War (Start of Human/Covenant war), Overprotective/Possessive behavior, Ruthless behavior, Kidnapping (not by John surprisingly), Murder implied, Blood, Dubious companionship/relationship.

I feel John will be easier to write for than Spartans in theory... then he has his personality that throws a wrench in things.

He's a marine, not a Spartan. Which means he still has all of his emotions intact.

He's strong, tough, and competitive.

He knows how to lead and knows how to get his missions done.

He's disciplined... although according to the Wiki it's said he failed his last psychological exam.

Which isn't the BEST sign....

It's said in canon he had a wife but mostly focused on military life since he couldn't cope with life outside of it.

He seems to be irritable as it says he struck an officer at one point.

So he seems to be a guy who's experienced and does his own thing... much to the chagrin of his team and superiors.

Despite this having more emotions than a Spartan, violence seems to be something constantly on his mind.

He'd never hurt you, though.

John doesn't seem like he'd be affectionate or even care too much at first.

He is capable of human emotion, but he is so used to war and fighting that he has trouble expressing such things.

Maybe you're a scientist like Ellen Anders, someone researching Forerunner tech that John has to watch over.

There's no doubt the Covenant plan to use humans to activate certain artifacts.

As a result, John is assigned to watch you similar to how he was with Anders to make sure you come out of the mission okay.

Your bond is rocky at first.

After all, you're a person of science... he's a person of violence that doesn't like to follow orders according to his file.

Despite this... John takes being your bodyguard seriously.

Originally he just saw it as "babysitting".

But he sees how important you are to humanity and even begins to enjoy conversation with you at times.

John seems like he'd be ruthless.

He is, but he is capable of being protective of you like any other.

Probably even possessive due to his competitive nature.

Other marines in his command may get too close to you, which causes John to call them out with a snarl.

You don't need to be concerned with them... he'll make sure they won't cause you trouble.

If the Covenant got their hands on you, something in John may just snap.

By this point he has grown attached and even finds comfort in your voice and smile.

So seeing you get kidnapped by the Covenant sends John into a... red rage.

Other Marines can't get close to him as he's so insistent on taking on the Covenant by himself.

He's sent with Red Team, a group of Spartans, but John's rage is feral in nature.

He wouldn't be calmed until you were back beside him.

For others, it's hard to tell why John has such a fixation on you.

But what is known is he'd cover himself in the blood of both his enemies and allies to see you safe.

He's... actually really scary.

It's hard for you to be scared if he's covered in Covenant blood, vibrant blues, purples, and oranges coating his armor.

But then when you look closer... you see splotches of red... and you begin to fear for whatever poor soul got in his way.

Despite his nature for combat, John promises not to harm a hair on your head.

It's not babysitting anymore, he actually cares for you now.

A bit too much, actually.

He doesn't just want to be a bodyguard for you... he'd sacrifice everything just to have you.

He doesn't care how many times they discipline him for disobeying.

He gets the job done... he's going to protect you... he's going to keep you for himself once this is all over.

"Scared of a little blood, dollface? Just the Covenant's blood, you'll be okay. Just let me take care of you... what do you mean you see red?"

[broodwolf221]

for dadwc, varric /& whomever (or solo): autophobia [ an irrational, extreme fear of being alone ]

happy writing!

-inquisimer

y'know, i think my favorite part of having joined dadwc is prompts like these, which make me consider a side of a character i never had before, and lead me down this fascinating rabbit hole. so thank you! this was a delight. @dadrunkwriting 827 words cws: none

Bartrand. Bianca. Hawke. Anders at the Hanged Man. Isabela. The Inquisitor. Solas. Hell, even Cassandra.

He kept himself busy. Kept himself in company. So that even when he was alone, he really wasn't, his thoughts occupied by worrying after his spies, his contacts, his friends, the Merchant's Guild, his family.

Still, he felt the weight of being alone. Living at the Hanged Man had taken the edge off, for even when he was alone in his room, the sounds of the city filtered in. He was never really alone.

But Skyhold was so quiet today. The Inquisitor and Hawke at Adamant, and no word back as yet, a strange hush falling over all who remained at the keep. He made the servants uneasy if he lingered in the kitchen, for he was seen as a core member of the Inquisition despite the fact that he'd never really joined and it made them feel overly observed, so he'd left them to their own devices.

Usually he was okay here, even when the Inquisitor left without him. The differences were significant, but the constant activity did remind him of Kirkwall; the shouts of merchants trying to set up or break down their stalls for the day or harking their wares, the deft rush of messengers, the constant chatter of Leliana's birds… there were always reminders of others. 

But today was bitterly cold, even for Skyhold, and an unpleasant rain had picked up a few hours ago. Sometimes it switched to hail, pinging off the worked stone, but whether rain or hail, it served to obscure the minimal sounds of the keep. Everyone was sticking to themselves, a palpable feeling of dread settling across all of them. It felt like something bad had happened, but he kept trying to convince himself that was nonsense. 

It was just a cold, rainy day, and that put a damper on people's spirits. So if everyone seemed particularly quiet and withdrawn today, even when he'd visited the pub, that was clearly the reason. Well, and the inevitable thread of worry that suffused all those left behind whenever the Inquisitor was away. Their sole hope and all.

For all he knew, it was just him. Maybe everyone else was just tired. Yeah, tired. He knew he was tired—exhausted, more like. He hadn't been sleeping well. So it was a rainy day and they were tired. Nothing was wrong, and the Inquisitor would return triumphant, and he'd have the next chapter of a book that he'd struggle to make sound even remotely realistic. Everything was fine. 

It was just that he hadn't felt this grim crush of fear for years. He had wandered all of Skyhold already, but the advisors were all holed up in the war room, Blackwall had turned down his offer of a round of Wicked Grace to kill time, and even though they talked sometimes while traveling, he knew better than to disturb Madame Vivienne in these halls. She always seemed to be preoccupied. Or maybe just imperious.

Or maybe she just plain didn’t want to talk.

Thing is, he kinda needed to talk. To someone. Or to hear them talk, or something. When he’d visited the pub, even Maryden was being uncharacteristically silent, sat down at the bar with an untouched drink and her lute leaned up beside her.

When it got this bad—and it'd been a while since it had—he always tried to turn to writing. A lot of The Tale of the Champion came out as a result of these moods, common after their strange little group shattered.

Blondie. Maker's breath. He wanted to talk to him, too, and that was… a lot. Too much. He still couldn't figure out if he was angry or understanding, guilty or bitter. Kirkwall was his home. Their little group had been so much of his life. An act of destruction at once massive and miniscule, nothing at all compared to what he'd seen within the Inquisition, but in so many ways the beginning of all this.

Of course, a part of him knew it wasn't all Anders’ fault. A part of him really did. But he hadn't found a way to forgive him, either. Not yet… not yet, and maybe not ever. For hurting his city. For breaking their group. For the beginning of the end. Or the beginning of the beginning. 

But he'd even talk to him, right now.

Instead he grabbed the little book that held all his mess—safest to keep it between pages, and in his own shorthand at that—and opened it up, setting out inkwell and quill.

Days like this, he began, and he'd have to rework that for sure if this ever went to print, the Inquisitor gone, Skyhold quiet, and a storm on the horizon…

He kept writing. He'd create his own answer, manufacture his own company from memory.

He'd get by. The Inquisitor would be back. The storm would pass. 

Oh, and they'd save the world, too.