#I might be sad and lonely but I am sexy and hot at least
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isoflurane · 4 months ago
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💖thirst trap💖
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It's Valentine day, and some fan service when Crewel daughter lost a bet and wearing a bunny outfit that hugs her curvs bit too well ( think of Jessica Rabbit level of sexy ) and all confident of her body as she sings on stage for them
All the boys reaction seeing both display and the show
I'm not doing all of them
🖤🖤🖤🖤
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Valentines Performance | Yandere TWST x Crewel Daughter Reader
First and foremost Crewel’s daughter never loses a bet
But charity does look good on her record so she’d do it
Heck you might even suggest it
“What? I know from my head to my toes that I’m practically irresistible. Of course you’d want me to be the main performance.”
You wouldn’t do it for just some boys wishing to ogle you for their own desires
That would be of no benefit to you
In fact, you’d force Crowley to pay
Who in turn forces your admirers to cough up a significant amount
But if you’re going to go through the trouble of dressing up and performing it will be for a good cause and for a good paycheck
So many lonely, sad people on such a day is something a princess shouldn’t ignore
If you have curves than great but even without you’re just as alluring 
But like everything you do it has the boys drooling:
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Azul Ashengrotto
He was proud to be apart of the latest cashgrab charity that the school was fundraising
And he was even happier to call upon you under that pretense
Its been years since he’s heard you sing
He can only imagine what its like now 
And with the excuse of being practice he’ll hear the chords you so casually ring out as the charity dinner is mapped out
But only when you’re fully made up and singing does he feel like his investment was truly worth it
“A-a-ah (Y/n) that was–”
“Amazing, I know. I can tell you’re excited but don’t go inking all over the floor before the finale.”
“Y-yeah.”
He really does have to stop himself 
He’s just so enamored 
One day he’ll have to ask trick you into singing a serenade to him
“A mate’s song needs to be, at the very least, decent enough to attract. Naturally, (Y/n) would exceed that, she truly is a prime mate and the only one I’d ever bother chasing after.”
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Kalim Al Asim
He loves that you’re scheduled to perform
Money isn’t an object anyway so he’s happy to pad your paycheck and donation
He just loves loves loves anything you do 
You could go outside in a chicken wunzie and sing horribly he’d still fling his money in your direction
But as he watches you appear on stage make up done, dress hugging tight something burns
His cheeks get warm and suddenly his clothes feel too hot to wear
A yearning that Kalim barely acknowledges to dangerous takes over and he’s in a daze for the entirety of the night
Don’t interrupt the performance 
Don’t bother him while he’s watching you sing in that sultry tone
Or you can see what its like when Jamil’s happy to follow Kalim’s orders+
“(Y/n) you should sing more often! Your voice is so beautiful!” 
“Thank you, Kalim.”
“Will you be doing another set? I’d love to play along side you!”
He’ll be replaying your performance in his head for years to come
Always letting a smile come to his face
“Wow I can’t get her voice out of my head! Maybe I should ask her to sing to me everynight!”
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Vil Schoenheit
If he isn’t hired himself to join you he’ll donate his talent with a small fee
But to be seen by millions as the most beautiful dream couple 
Neige could never
But ego aside he loves nothing more than performing with you side by side
Brought back to the days you two would make little plays and shows for your fathers to watch 
Now this was just fate in work, wasn’t it
That you two would be preparing a duet that’d have the world talking for weeks 
“Are you ready to delivery our harmony of ecstasy?”
“You know I am. I like your trim by the way.”
“And I yours. Though we both know anything you wear is better than couture.”
For this moment and this moment only will he encourage the hunter to share his recordings
He won’t be able to hear your voice out in the crowd
But it couldn’t compare to the sound of being beside you
As it was always meant to be
“Becoming a duo? Who’s to say? We both have big plans for the future but naturally we’ll be together asitsalwaysbeen.”
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neonnhoney-rec · 5 years ago
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Min Yoongi
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Here are a few yoongi recs, most of them I've read and love, some are in my TBR. Tbh most of them are smut, but some are fluff and angst mostly angst. I will keep updating this woop woop.
I hope you enjoy tehee!
revenge- @lustfuldevils
fuck boy yoongs
request: yoongi teaches you to give a bj- @kpurereactions
says it on the tin
Theres no need to be nervous around Yoongi, he’ll take care of you and make you feel good no matter what it is you’re doing.
sangria- @minstrivia
a day at the beach has yoongi hornier than he’d like to admit.
missing link- @drquinzelharleen
You catch Yoongi playing with himself before a night out and some part of you wants to join him. That’s crazy though, he’s your best friend… Right?
talk- @httpjeon​
you walk in on yoongi on the phone with a customer
act on it- @dom-joonie
You learn that the cute barista you’ve been crushing on might have an…otherworldly disposition after you accidentally cut yourself.
too sweet- @justoneday-namjoonii
you smell so sweet to them the best they’ve ever had (vampire au)
moving to a university with a few secrets, has you falling for these boys who need your help
too hot to sleep- @gamerguk
“ Umm can’t wait to get rawed in our kitchen when I’m living with the love of my life ” 
can you turn off your phone- @btssavemylifeblr
Yoongi’s alarm clock wakes you up at 6 am on a Sunday and you are not happy about it.  At least, not at first…
grey area- @blushoseoks
and just like that, your fate was sealed - because min yoongi was absolutely going to destroy you. but hell if you weren’t going to let him, or bask happily in the flames as he did so. 
and sadly, at the time, you didn’t think that your thoughts would become so literal.
dancing with the devil- @minnpd​
suga daddy suga
asphodel- @hayjeon
A series of drabbles and moments surrounding Hades, the god of death and Persephone, the goddess of nature
lifeguard yoongi- @gukgalore
who knew making eyes at a hot lifeguard would get you what you really wanted.
yoongi cums in his pants- @hobiorbit
dry humping yoongi till cums in his pants cause its hot
boy .girl- @floralseokjin
Boy. Girl. It’s as simple as that. Girl can’t get a good date—scrap that—girl can’t get a good lay, and boy is willing to help out with that… Friends with benefits seems the perfect solution, except for the fact, it’s not. It never is. Not when boy already has feelings for girl…
Evil- @littlemisskookie
Your life is pretty boring, apart from being the Alpha of your pack. But it gets a bit more exciting when you discover Yoongi wants to spend his heat with none other than you.
Bet i can make you cum without touching your cock- @cyphertrip
says it on the tin
boseong breakfast- @honeymoonjin
it may be misfortune that brings you to min yoongi’s door looking for a place to stay, but luckily holly lodge has a vacancy.
Love is for birds baby- @mininky
You refuse to believe in love. It’s a concept created by big corporations like hallmark to get sad saps like you to buy their shit. But it’s all fake. You’re convinced of that at least until a series of events with a certain tattoo artist who you loved to hate makes you question everything you’ve ever known.
Hands- @moonlightchildz
hand fetish? is that a thing?
Producer!yoongi- @matchakoo
where yoongi’s song plays over a really serene and domestic smut scene 
Please be naked- @floralseokjin 
ou find it’s easy to become addicted to a distraction…
Lonely hearts club-  @joonbird
 “In this world, currency is not money but life, and those who cannot repay their debts have no choice but to submit for the Separation - a procedure in which the soul and mind are extracted from their bodies, leaving behind nothing but an empty shell. Jeon Jungkook is an underground tattoo artist hiding from the outside world. She has been waiting her whole life to be Separated. They were never supposed to meet - let alone fall in love.”
- or -
“Two lonely hearts collide.”
Rose garden dreams- @glossgf
you, a princess not yet betrothed, and your knight, Yoongi, have fallen in love. But what happens when a prince asks for your hand in marriage? What will you and Yoongi do then…?
single parent au- @yukheii​
your daughter is very fond of yoongi
Us, plus two- @deathbyyoongi
You and Yoongi sharing a moment, relishing in the glow of your growing family when your daughter has a nightmare, and Yoongi has to take care of those pesky monsters.
When the power goes out- @inkjam-moon
When a storm causes the electricity to go out, it becomes to dark in the apartment to study, so you and Yoongi have to find another way to pass the time.
Conveniently- @baeseoul
you live above a convenience store with your daughter, owned by a rather attractive yoongi. this is the story of how u and your daughter gained another member to your little family.
Destruction of a muse- @baeseoul
you’re in your last year of uni doing literature and lose your motivation, and it’s not till you meet a talented musician you get your ambition back. a. lot. of. angust.
Long distance-  @miss-noo-na
Yoongi misses the sound of your voice.
Conjecture-  @writingsofmyimagination​
Your management refused to renew your contract unless you collaborated, so you ending up working with Min Yoongi. A guy you’d disliked from before both of your debuts. There is more to their past than meets the eye.
Photoshoot tease- @shooting-stars-library
“Min Yoongi is a sexy little shit and he knows it.”
What if-  @blameblamebts
Being in a gang wasn’t a good thing, and it never would be, always looked down upon. But it isn’t what people think it to be. It’s worse. Much worse.
Aawake at night- @softyoongiionly​
You can’t sleep. Luckily, your boyfriend can’t either. 
Clair de lune- @yoonia
You were ready to leave a part of your life to move on to the next, and he is willing to give you a chance to end it glamorously. But at what cost? And will he be a part of the life you are leaving behind or will he be there for the next part of it? 
Reflections- @yoonia
“How could I ever forget about you" parent au
Faded- @yoonia
You were his soulmate, that part he knew well. Until one day he didn’t want you anymore. He couldn’t, when all he could see from you was light and all he felt within himself was darkness. Your love has gone cold as he retreated from you, burying himself deep in the dark. But what happened when Yoongi had to watch you start over with somebody else, when Yoongi let his selfishness gain control on him of you.
Monday- @strwberrytae
It’s that special time a month that brings you great pain yet great joy. Sure, there’s cramps and absolute uncomfort but your little monthly friend makes you insanely horny. Needy and desperate for a release that only your boyfriend can provide, will he cave and give you what you want?
Makeshift chemistry- @jungblue
Fleeting lust was all you’d ever known, nothing serious or long lasting, just a temporary fix to satisfy your needs. That is until you meet Min Yoongi who is determined to put an end to your binge of makeshift relationships.
What you did last summer- @winetae
Yoongi was fine with a lot of things—you maxing out his credit cards to buy ridiculously expensive items of clothing that you never wore more than once, you taking out his newest ride for a spin without permission, you spending an extra thirty minutes on your hair and makeup when he was running late for a dinner function. 
What he was not okay with, however, was you sharing your pussy with barely-out-of-college boys who were incapable of going five seconds without creaming their pants.
No, that was where he drew the line.
Bad boys bring it to you- @yuengi​
tattoo artist yoongi
Fortuna- @readyplayerhobi
300 years ago, half the world’s population died when the experimental Fortuna virus escaped. The remaining male population has been rendered infertile with one loophole that has meant polyamorous relationships have become the norm.
Crescendo- @dreamyjoons
after hours of waiting for the grumpy pianist to leave the stage, you finally have it out with him in a way better than you could have imagined. 
Restraint-  @writingsofmyimagination​
As Jungkook’s best friend recently moved to Seoul, there is one of the boys you have yet to meet. This one has a dark secret and has to use all the restraint he can to control himself around you.
Curious- @honeymoonjin
Taehyung confides in you and your boyfriend Yoongi that he might be bi, and the two of you offer to let him experiment with you to find out. 
Gingham- @ropeseok​
There’s no place like home! At least, that’s how Yoongi felt after a long night of taking the little one trick-or-treating. He can’t wait to take his costume off - however, he seems to insist that you keep yours on.​
Somebody else- @jamaisjoons
yoongi doesn’t want you anymore. but he can’t stand watching you with someone else. post break up au.
Do you love me-  @caribbeanempressblog
Yoongi is bad at feelings
Love well done- @oraclemarie
You are the executive chef of your very own fine dining restaurant. A big company makes you the offer of a lifetime, setting you on a path straight to Min Yoongi-your drunken hook up. 
Pepero day- @kittae
Valentine’s with your best friend, yoongi
The last- @kittae
When the world’s gone to shit and you’ve taught yourself to stay alive while danger lurks around every corner, the last thing you need is another mouth to feed and extra “dead” weight. Yet you can’t bring yourself to leave another human being behind, and it might as well have been your worst decision ever… or was it the best?
Baby’s fist christmas- @hobisbeautifulass​
3 months after you give birth to your first child, you and your husband start putting together the perfect first Christmas for your new family of three.
This is just to say  – @btsiguess
To say it’s unusual to have a soulmate is an understatement, and most people desperately wish to have an elegant name scrawled upon their wrist. In reality though, you’d have to say it causes much more issues than it solves.
I like you – @iq-biased
A surprise visit from a friend leaves Yoongi with a night to remember, and something to say
Small things- @floralseokjin
you and vamp yoongi have an argument
Daddy diaries- @bts-reveries
yoongi started blogging his life on his social medias to prove everyone who thought he couldn’t raise a child alone wrong. but as his daughter’s birthday draws near, what happens when she wishes for a new mom?
Drink me- @njssi​
Your vampire boyfriend refuses to bite you in fear of not being able to stop himself. But you always get what you want.
Rule of thirst- @prolixitae
vampires were just folklore until yoongi became one. now he’s got only two emotions: you and hunger. and tonight, you let him feed off you.
A ticket to the sun- @seokeros​ (ao3)
In a world where a person's life is determined by a piece of paper on a monthly basis, love is practically impossible. But there's always an exception, and with that exception, there comes a price.
Alt: yoongo gets punched in the face by a girl who believes she is cursed, and he stupidly, helplessly, falls in love.
Wildest moments- @joonbird
“Min Yoongi is forbidden territory. And although you both know better, the two of you just can’t seem to stay apart.”
Breakfast in bed- @joonbird
“Min Yoongi, a grumpy Ikea employee, is wondering who you are and why exactly you’re sleeping in the display bed at his Ikea.”
Hyung, open the door- @gotmetalkinginmysleep
You’ve been keeping the boys awake with your moaning for months thanks to Yoongi. Tae and Jungkook want to find out why.
The singularity theory- @dovechim
in your last year of undergrad, you find out what a gloryhole is at the expense of your final year thesis. it’s a classic example of a psychology experiment that went way, way wrong. 
You look like you need a drink- @dark-muse-iris
After a bad week with the worst luck imaginable, you happen upon a local dive bar run by an attractive young bartender who livens up your evening.
The married life- @jungnoir
being married is never a bore when your husband is a vampire king + inspired by  “Stop calling me Princess!” “I apologize, my Queen.”.
Taxi- @honeyedhoseok
 ❛  Drinks at a bar + a rainy night + a single taxi to share with the bane of your existence, Min Yoongi = one interesting car ride back to your apartment.  ❜ 
First love- @writing-in-ivory
You first saw him in the multi-purpose room. Later learn his name, and on your third year, as he becomes your neighbor, you discover his lifestyle. Knowing your crush on him was nothing but that, you wanted to find the courage to look for love. Asking your friend for help, you’re pointed in the direction of the expert. Your neighbor, Min Yoongi. 
pugna- @jungwoohoos
he showed up at your doorstep one day, covered in cuts and testing your patience. you don’t know why, but you felt compelled to help him. you just don’t realize how deep that runs
Mean yoongi- @jjkpls
Min Yoongi asks you to take care of his plants when he’s gone. It doesn’t go as planned and well, he has to deal with your misbehaving ass.
Sour skittles- @softyoongiionly
WELCOME TO GLASSCLAW! The only city where you can get a homecooked meal and a hitman all on the same street! You moved to GlassClaw for a fresh start after a group of raiders invaded your previous compound. Unbeknownst to you, the city has its own collection of riff raff and, at the head of it all is your neighbor Min Yoongi. The mischevious merchant with one hell of a sailor mouth is known for swindling the rich and, serving the poor. The world has become convoluted and chaotic since the apocalypse but, two things were certain: You were so much more than pretty face and, Yoongi was so much more than just a thief.
Life’s little joys-  @littlemeowmeowschimmy
getting pregers with yoongi
Fear and dumplings-  @softyoongiionly
You’re in your final semester at University when your Abnormal Psychology professor assigns you a partnered project surrounding your greatest fears. Lucky for you, your partner just so happens to be a cute boy named Min Yoongi.
Min yoongi, library services- @kpopfanfictrash
When you accept the the offered research position at Bangtan University, you are well aware of your partner’s prestige. The only problem is - so is he.
Behind the stick-  @randombtsprincessa
Your bartender for the night and you take an interest in one another.
Mic drop- @ve1vetyoongi
when underground rapper min yoongi uncovers the dirty secret behind his biggest rival, your brother and hip hop champion kim namjoon’s success, he is determined to take home this year’s mic drop contest trophy no matter who he hurts along the way. you’re behind the camera, content with capturing namjoon’s picture perfect persona from the sidelines but when his hard-faced enemy Gloss, makes you realise you could be more than just the point and shoot, you start to feel your loyalties shifting.
Pinewood and poetry- @spicykoreantatertots
After getting closer to and developing a crush on your friend over the summer, you want nothing more than to cozy up to him as the seasons start to change. That is until your ex-boyfriend, Jung Hoseok, returns from his summer study abroad program. Will Hoseok stand in the way of your budding romance with your mutual friend, Min Yoongi?
His hands- @nahfamily
You hadn’t ever paid much attention to Min Yoongi until a stupid icebreaker at your office. Now, you can’t get him, and his hands, out of your head
Birthday boy- @btssmutgalore
Yoongi wants to give his best friend Jimin the perfect birthday gift… And it just so happens to be you.
Happy valentine’s day- @sweetwritertanya​
You have a very special idea for this Valentine’s Day, focused completely on your boyfriend Yoongi who comes home to an unexpected surprise. 
Happy birthday- @parkmuse
Your boyfriend Jimin has a bit of a surprise for you on your birthday, and he goes by the name of Yoongi.
Arranged-  @minyoongijjangjjangmanboongboong
Y/N is a struggling student in Seoul: working multiple jobs, living in a broom closet apartment, and often sacrificing her dignity for the sake of her livelihood. What happens when a handsome stranger presents her with an offer she cannot refuse at the moment she needs it most?
This tiny space-  @ubemango
Yoongi was always attractive—your sexy piece of ass, as you like to remind him often—and seeing the tight skin of his back when he undresses further makes the insides of your stomach churn in want: the kind that made you want to fall to your knees, grovel. You love having a kid, but it’s been too long.
The boa constrictor-  @tatertotthethot
You’ve always had a bad habit of drinking copious amounts of water just before going to bed every night, and for some reason, you always seem to forget that it’ll eventually lead to you having to wake up a few hours later with a dire need to pee. 
Dope- @honeymoonjin
The HSD is a branch of the South Korean government tasked with taking down the most infallible criminals in Seoul’s underbelly. Kim Namjoon, or RM, is their next target: the extremely well-spoken and careful leader of a cocaine dealing gang.
Listen closely- @avveh
Unintentionally, you stumble upon something that makes you view your coworker Min Yoongi in a whole new light.
The truth between us- @jimlingss
a book deal should be the most exciting time of your life, but there seems to be a constant and omnipresent damper on your mood in the form of a certain min yoongi, who you would just cut out from your life, if he weren’t your editor. but then, the world shifts beneath your feet, and you begin to wonder if maybe you’ve always been looking at life from the wrong angle. 
Surround me- @minflix
after a very unfair and unjust firing from his bartending job, yoongi just wants to soothe his sadness by spending some quality time with his best friend - who he is very much in love with.
Cockwarming – @gukgalore​
Ngl the thought of cockwarming Yoongi is the only thing keeping me going at this point
Havana- @inkjam-moon​
You’ve spent the last six years following in your parents footsteps all the way to Cuba, trying to make them proud by finishing their research, but when you join forces with a snarky boat owner who knows more than he lets on, will things play out the way you planned them?
The equation of  love- @kookingtae​
When you met Yoongi in a club, you thought it was fate that brought the two of you together. But after you walked into your college math class for the very first time, you weren’t so sure anymore.
Workaholic- @hobiwonder​
Yoongi needs to relax and Hoseok has many tricks up his sleeve to make him. None of them Yoongi thought included hiring a hooker to pay him a visit one stormy night. 
Different- @satisfractions​
in which tattooartist!yoongi meets floral!reader because he needs to practice drawing flowers for his job
Salud- @yukheii
ninja yoongi (Naruto au)
Toke temptation-  @strawbxxymilk​
You accidentally confess your feelings to Yoongi during a smoke sesh
Accidents- @jungxk​
dad!yoongi makes me soft and also h*rny
Fists- @badbhye​​
reader’s first time
The early shift-  @hobidreams​
your coworker yoongi is always infuriatingly late. except the one time he’s much too early.
Mixtape- @jungblue​
Two mystery students from your college run the podcast dubbed ‘mixtape.’ It’s become a sort of phenomenon around campus, listened to by almost everyone. In their most recent episode they discussed various study methods… One of them being oh so tempting.
Three squeezes-  @nomnomsik​
Yoongi is notorious for his grumpy and emotionless behavior as director of an upcoming company. Yet, it’s a mystery to everyone how manager Hoseok always seems to soften him up. The truth is that the two are actually engaged. Unknown to this fact, you happen to take an interest in Hoseok… and he does too. 
Yoongi cums in his pants- @gukgalore​
where u and yoongi are making out and u start grinding on him, and he tells u to stop bc he’s gonna cum his pants. But u don’t and he acc does cum his pants
Kitten- @yminie​
Yoongi’s focus on work has subjected your relationship to having a dry spell, and with a little prompting from your best friend, you tell him exactly what he should do. But you don’t make the rules kitten, and the game you’re choosing to play is a dangerous one.
Wine- @junghelioseok​
he makes staying after-hours absolutely worthwhile. restaurant au
Renatus- @mininky​
(y/n) finds herself in a very unusual situation where her fate seems to be woven with Hades himself, who’s too much of a jerk for her to even admit that sure okay he’s kind of really good looking.​
Cobalt and charcoal- @tayegi​
soulmate au
Touch of silk-  @floralseokjin​ 
In a world where vampires coexist with the living, there are many humans looking for a cheap thrill…you’re ashamed to admit you’re curious too, putting to good use a dating app you find…but Min Yoongi is nothing like you imagined a vampire to be…
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hermannsthumb · 5 years ago
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AT THE PARTY WEARING COSTUMES AND I KNOW WHO YOU ARE BUT I'M PRETENDING I DON'T HAS SO MUCH......THINK OF THE SIMULTANEOUS SEXINESS BUT ALSO PAIN AND PINING....... THE NEXT DAY PRETENDING LIKE IT WASN'T YOU TWO TOGETHER....BONIS IF THEY BOTH KNOW WHO EACH OTHER ARE BUT DON'T REALISE THE OTHER DOES........ BONUS BONUS IF THIS IS NEWMANN AND THEY ANGST OVER IT FOR YEARS AFTER UNTIL THE DRIFT
Anonymous said: WAIT CAM WE GET IN COATUME PRETENDING I DON'T KNOW WHO YOU ARE
from list of halloween prompts here
okay i basically only completed the first chunk of this but i feel like the last “angsting until after the drift” is a given (and small warning in case youd consider it dub con makeouts: one character doesn’t recognize the other, while the other does and thinks he’s just pretending not to). also requires no small amount of extension of disbelief LMAO but newt and hermann are dumbasses so
——————————————–
“Hey there, cutie,” Newton says.
Hermann startles for a multitude of reasons, and not in the least because of Newton’s chosen form of address–though it is quite a bizarre choice, even for him. Mainly, it’s because of Newton’s costume, which has changed his appearance to the point of being nearly unrecognizable. His hair is teased up as high as it can go. He’s done up his face with horrendous mold-colored makeup. He’s in a filthy lab coat (definitely lifted from the lab) splattered in red corn starch and fake slime. He’s probably meant to be some sort of undead, mutated mad scientist. Hermann doesn’t really care.
“Hello,” Hermann says, and rolls his eyes. “What do you want?” It’s a Halloween party for Shatterdome personnel, so it’s not as if he didn’t assume Newton would be coming, but he’s surprised Newton’s evidently elected spend the night annoying him out of all his other options. Newton rarely misses a chance to drink hard liquor and make a fool of himself when the opportunity arises.
Newton takes the acknowledgement of his presence to mean please, encroach upon my personal space at once, and he inches close enough to Hermann that Hermann can smell the chemical chalkiness of his cheap makeup. “I just wanted to compliment your costume,” he says. “It’s mysterious. I might even say sexy.”
“You might?” Hermann says, waiting for the penny to drop, the or I would, if it wasn’t you, or even just a little just kidding–Hermann’s costume is comically simple, dark cloak with a dark hood over his normal clothing, fangs he didn’t bother to wear, meant to be some sort of vampire according to the packaging–but Newton surprises him by nudging their elbows together and fluttering his eyelashes almost demurely.
“You bet I would,” Newton says. “I dig vampires.” His eyes drag over Hermann’s body. Not that Hermann suspects he can make any of it out, thanks to the cloak. He’s bewildered by the behavior all the same. Is he intoxicated? He must be intoxicated. “What are you doing later?”
“Sleeping,” Hermann says.
Newton lets out a too-loud burst of laughter. Hermann tightens his grip on his cup, and the plastic crinkles dangerously. “Before that,” Newton says.
“Nothing exceptionally exciting, I imagine,” Hermann says. The irritation he usually feels around Newton whenever Newton is being particularly dense has already begun its onset. What is he talking about? He probably wants to rub something in Hermann’s face–some storage closet hookup, or maybe a guaranteed one later. (Look how much more action I’m getting than you, Hermann.)
“How about I,” Newton says, “take you home?”
The way he says it–the pitched voice, the hazy eyelids, the little swipe of his tongue over his lower lip–leaves no doubt in Hermann’s mind as to what he’s implying, and Hermann’s whole world whirls around him. Is he meant to be Newton’s storage closet hookup of the night? Does Newton–find Hermann attractive, like that? “Oh,” Hermann says simply.
“I know it’s fast,” Newton says, “and you don’t even know who the fuck I am–”
“Oh,” Hermann repeats. Of course: it’s a game. Newton’s playing a game. They’re strangers tonight. It makes perfect sense. It doesn’t, really, but Newton’s always doing strange things like this, so perhaps it’s merely an odd attempt at finally confessing his attraction in the most roundabout way possible. Besides, his interest has excited Hermann greatly. Hermann’d be out of his mind to let an offer like this slip through his fingers. (He is, after all, regrettably attracted to Newton beyond words.) It helps that he’s just tipsy enough for this to seem like a very good idea. “Yes,” he says, and gives Newton a wobbly smile that he expects is quite invisible under his costume.
“What?” Newton says. 
“Yes,” Hermann says, louder over the music and emboldened with the strangest thrumming of confidence. Newton thinks he looks sexy. “You and I. Let’s–”
Newton braces himself on Hermann’s shoulders and kisses him. He’s a messy kisser. Overeager. It’s as if he can’t quite decide what to do with his tongue. He tastes interesting, too, a strange combination of alcohol and candy that has Hermann equal parts recoiling and swiping his tongue against Newton’s eagerly. Newton doesn’t notice his hesitance. “Mm,” he moans. Hermann finds himself pressed against the wall; Newton’s lips–hot–go to his neck. “Yeah, this is–”
“I thought you said you wanted to take me home,” Hermann says, breathless.
“Yeah, yeah, fine,” Newton says. “C’mon, hurry up, I’m horny.”
Hermann wrinkles his nose. “How charming.”
Newton doesn’t turn the lights on in his messy bunk, which means Hermann must go slow or run the risk of tripping over a dozen piles of clothing, and he can scarcely keep up with Newton. “Do your bloody laundry,” he finally snaps, whacking at a pile of socks with his cane and sending them flying.
“You sound like my lab partner,” Newton huffs. He curls his hand around Hermann’s and pulls him forward to the bed. Hermann’s cane hits the ground with a little thump. “There.”
“I certainly hope I sound like your lab partner,” Hermann mumbles. He can scarcely make out Newton’s silhouette above him, but he feels himself laid against the bed, against a pile of soft cushions at the headboard, and then Newton straddling his hips and mouthing against his neck. Newton’s mouth is wonderful; pink, and soft. His stubble is wonderful, too, scratchy with just the right amount of burn on Hermann’s skin. “Ah.”
“Take that stupid hood off,” Newton says. He flicks his tongue over Hermann’s pulse point; his hand slips down to rub at the front of Hermann’s trousers. “I wanna see you better.”
Hermann agrees in a small moan. He doesn’t even care that Newton is smearing the cheap party makeup all over his skin. “Oh, Newton–”
Newton freezes. “How do you know my name?”
Of course. The game. “Mm. Apologies,” Hermann says. “I forgot we don’t know each other.”
Newton rolls off of him and fumbles with his lamp, and Hermann scarcely has time to blink at the sudden blinding brightness of the room before Newton is ripping back his hood. When his eyes adjust, it’s to see a gaping and mortified Newton above him. “Hermann?!” he squeaks. “What–why–”
“Is something the matter?” Hermann says, swallowing down no small amount of confusion and no smaller still amount of hurt. Perhaps he’s not as attractive in proper lighting. He tugs on the front of Newton’s labcoat and puts on a brave face anyway. “I quite liked what you were doing with your–”
“Fuck, dude,” Newton says, pulling away from him, and Hermann shuts his mouth. His face grows warm. “I didn’t know–I’m sorry, I didn’t know it was you. I wouldn’t have–”
“Ah,” Hermann says.
He wishes he could feel humiliated, or even angry, but all he really feels is a lonely, crushing sadness. Newton thought he was someone else. Of course. Newton would never actually want– Hermann sits up with a small nod. “If you’ll excuse me, Newton.”
“No, wait,” Newton says, blinking, “wait, were you…enjoying yourself?”
“I don’t see why it matters,” Hermann says. “I will see you at work on Monday.”
“Hermann,” Newton says, but Hermann is already out the door.
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dio-roga · 5 years ago
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After years of stalling, this is finally seeing the light of day and thank actual jesus for that. There’s more fic out there than you’d think for the best boys, but like all things, sturgeon's law’s in effect when it comes to quality (big time actually, around 35 fics on this list from a rough 350 in existence). I read them all so you don’t have to.
Higher rank the better (though obviously YMMV) and the rest should just be ordered by word count. I have a place in my heart for everything on this list so no matter where it is or what I say about it, trust me, if it’s here, I think it’s worth your time.
Will do my best to keep things up to date. I F5 tabs like you wouldn’t believe. Love you guys ❤
[SSS RANK] ABSOLUTE TOP SHELF
ego, opinion, art & commerce 24parts
We hopefully all know it, we certainly all love it. The canon-compliant, rock-band road-trip AU that’s destined to rule the entire ship one day; the cryde child of prophecy. Go in hard and this’ll take you away like nothing else. The only thing not absolutely perfect about this fic is (like the rest of us) you’ll have to wait for the ending. I know waiting sucks, but please don’t let it stop you bingeing this story right now. I am not exaggerating when I say it’s better than most published books you’ll ever read.
let your heart hold fast niente
Literally the best finished cryde fic ever written as of time of writing this. The boys have grown up. Clyde’s a writer, Craig’s distant, and familiar circumstances bring them crashing back together. The cast of characters are a complete joy, it’s fully drenched in canon, and sports an amazingly rich post-series lore with all manner of cute nods and easter eggs for fans of the show. Nothing short of a masterpiece. Written with such love. Treasure your first read of it.
[SS RANK] AMAZING READS GAURANTEED
Pulling Mussels SekritOMG
A divisive fic maybe, but a classic all the same. Get ready for a fresh take on normal fic conventions to be sure. Personally? I’d consider it top shelf, no question. But to others? They might end up absolutely hating it. A strange midlife odyssey wherein a fed-up, lonely Craig begrudgingly reconnects with an out-of-shape, stagnated Clyde. Memorable to say the least, packed to bursting with detail and personality; go in with the right mindset and its glorious set pieces with burn themselves into your memories. Possibly the fic I’ve re-read the most ever.
Darkness Falls Vampiracy
Do you like cute, gorgeously written things? Set during the three days of Stick of Truth, it tells the behind-the-scenes story of Craig’s growing infatuation with the Lord of Darkness. Everything about this is clever and charming and just generally heart-warming. Best read after playing the game for maximum enjoyment, feel smart and accomplished as you pick out all the references. This fic’s adorable and pure and can do no wrong. 
Chicken Vampiracy
The gateway fic? Huge question mark? This story is cryde personified. Like the author distilled the ships very essence into this amazingly funny and light-hearted story about the boys playing the world’s most drawn out game of gay chicken. It’s impossible not to love this story, it’s perfect for what it is, and will leave you feeling happy by the end every time. What more could you want? Show this one to your friends and they’ll finally ‘get’ cryde.
the remains of our sky traiyadhvika
I’ll level with you fam, this story will emotionally cripple you, prepared or not. The writing is precise, sublime, and utterly heart-breaking. It tells the story of how Craig deals with the aftermath of Clyde’s death on Everest. Obviously a heavy topic, but I can tell you with complete confidence that this fic not only does the subject matter justice, but also manages to tell a story of love and hope despite it. Like Butters said, it’s a beautiful sadness. This fic had me obsessively researching mountains for weeks, and anything that can light that kind of fire in you is something special.
C & C, The Mystery Duo Darkyfoot
There is nothing in here but pure fluff, joy and happiness. This story will lighten your soul and brighten your heart. It tells the tale of the boys discovering a life-long obsession for hunting mysteries, and will resonate with anyone who’s ever held a strong passion in their lives (which is probably most of you, if you’re hunting down SP fics to read). The written equivalent of a warm blanket and a steaming hot mug of cocoa on a cold winter’s night.
[S RANK] THE REALLY GOOD STUFF
Equality Donkerblauw Fluweel
A good chill-out fic? Cataloguing a series of parties over the summer in which Clyde starts cozying up to Craig after much alcohol is consumed; and like a good drink, the fic mixes all its elements together nicely. It’s nothing ground breaking, but it’s got a super relaxing flow to it, and will brighten your mood by the end. It nails the party atmosphere, so if you’ve got no-where to go this Friday night, maybe pour yourself a little something and give this one a read.
Craig Likes Vanilla (Ice Cream) themuffintitan
The cuteness equivalent of porn. If you’ve got a list of cliché ‘aww’ scenarios, chances are they’ll play out in this fic. If hand holding and sharing an ice-cream make you melt (hahanotfunny) then this one’s definitely for you. For a fairly simple story about Craig and the squad visiting a waterpark, it’s remarkably detailed (check that word count fam), and has a killer summer atmosphere to boot. It certainly made me hit up a park last July. The writing does let it down in a few areas, but overall you’ll probably be too busy enjoying the ride to notice.
The Silent Lie Donkerblauw Fluweel
Guilty pleasure? Okay you caught me red-handed. This fic’s practically porn. Read all about how Clyde learns to surrender his heterosexuality as Craig massages away all his football injuries in the steamiest way possible. If I’m being totally honest? The story’s pretty obviously there to frame the smut, and writing can be a bit all over the place. But I can’t deny it just works. It’s hot AF. Come here for the sexies and you won’t leave disappointed. Read it after dark. ;)
Press Play flappySp00kster
Arguably unfinished, but the only thing missing is apparently a mostly superfluous epilogue. We’re in full AU territory here as Clyde hooks up with Craig on a dating app during a rough-patch with his long-time, and now ex, girlfriend. Your mileage may vary obviously as the story’s not canon compliant; however the boys behave like you’d imagine and the romance is nicely fleshed out and unique. Bonus points for a bit of kink in the sex scenes, which is rarer than you’d expect for this ship.
What Happened in 1637 pinkfloyd1770
One of the most strikingly unique stories out there; it’s essentially a flower shop AU in which Clyde embraces his Dutch heritage and sports and encyclopedic knowledge on tulip facts. Written in medias res during a seemingly long since established relationship with Craig, this fic merely offers a look into this unique take on the couple as they go about their lives. The detail is stunning, and you’ll find vivid mental pictures coming to life in every scene. If you can get past the fact Craig bottoms (let’s pretend he was feeling generous that evening) then you’ll certainly be charmed with this one. (1637 is the year the tulip bubble finally popped. In case you were wondering.)
Around My Head wendybirb
Are you looking for something that’s light and fluffy? Maybe you like reading Clyde’s inner monologue as he fumbles around high-key pining over his best friend? Perfect, sign yourself up to this fic; it’s a quick and easy read that’ll give you your daily dose of wholesomeness from one of my favorite authors. Nothing overly flashy or complicated here, just boys being cute and kissing.
hey there demons traiyadhvika
This spooky affair is thankfully a lot less of an emotional roller-coaster than it’s cousin ‘remains of our sky’, but that’s not to say it doesn’t grab you and refuse to let go. Have you ever wondered what Craig and Clyde would be like trying to host one of those dorky haunted house shows? Bonus points in that Craig can legitimately see ghosts? It’s a fresh concept that’ll really get your mind racing with the cutest hosts you could ask for. Kept me glued to my seat, ready to throw down if any bad spirits came between the best boys. Slept with the hall lights on for a couple nights ngl.
As Good a Reason as Any Vampiracy
The last of the sacred trinity that also includes Chicken and Darkness Falls, the only reason this fic isn’t ranked higher is because it’s also the authors shortest. Watching Clyde try anything and everything to spend more time with Craig is as endearing as it sounds, and the only thing that sucks is that it doesn’t overstay its welcome; when honestly, you’d like the fic to stay for dinner and spend the night. Quality everything. No joke made my heart flutter. Read it and know true happiness.
Kiss It Better dokidave
A one and done story of Craig trying to cheer Clyde up after a difficult day. This fic’s a nice double whammy if you’re looking for some hurt and comfort mixed in with some steamy sex scenes. It delivers exactly what is says on the box; don’t expect too much in the way of plot of development, but certainly feel free to gush over the sappy sweet character moments. A good pick-me-up fic if you’re having a lousy day.
Take a Chance (You Say It's Your Birthday) Miaou Jones (miaoujones)
So here we have Craig being drunk and vulnerable, while Clyde’s radiating raw sexuality as he dances for Craig’s camera. I’m usually all about Craig giving off that top energy, but the way this story frames (hahakillme) the whole dynamic is very soft and endearing; you can fully understand why Craig’s the one feeling thirsty this time around. This is a fic that really knows how to set a mood. Read it and feel like you’re being pampered.
You Make It Easier glowworm888
Pure comfort; Clyde’s feeling understandably miserable about the thought of growing up without his mom, and Craig’s doing his best to help Clyde cope. Wholesome dumb teenagers looking out for each other and low-key falling in love. I dare you not to feel all happy inside as Clyde slowly begins to feel better as Craig looks after him. Adorable throughout, the ending is very much them. Another good read for making a crappy day a better one.
Miss you x Vampiracy
A true hidden gem by one of the best authors in the whole fandom; we have here the best fic in which Clyde doesn’t even appear. The whole schoolyard gang give their two cents on Craig’s spiraling mental state as he tries desperately to justify a typo to Clyde during an obsessive summer-long texting marathon. Legitimately funny from start to finish, with buttery-smooth dialogue and a big soft ending that’ll have you grinning ear-to-ear for completely different reasons. Love it, cherish it, and dream of more. Vampiracy ̶ we’ll miss you x.
[A RANK] SHORT AND SWEET
Whatever Gets You Through The Night Miaou Jones (miaoujones)
There’s a lot of mixed feelings for me in this fic. A love-letter to Clyde and his parents, in which Craig gets caught up on the whole ‘love’ part of it, having trouble fully expressing himself due to some heavy personal baggage. The Donovan’s really shine in this story. Betsy’s alive and massively comforting, Roger’s family values personified, and Clyde’s being a sweetheart to end all sweethearts. It’s confronting, more than a little emotionally messy, but it’s none the less a story that’ll stay with you. Check the comments for a hidden stinger.
Some Dieting Donkerblauw Fluweel
Clyde’s self-image problems are the focus this time around, doing a commendable job pushing the ideas of healthy progress, properly looking after yourself and feeling comfortable letting others help out. It’s a good length for the story it is, and although the writing gets a little spotty in parts you’ll be unlikely take too much notice. Like Clyde, this one’s hearts in the right place.
If Time Could Stand Still WeCryde
I used to stumble across this story semi-regularly back in the day, wondering if I’d missed it before realizing we’d already been well acquainted. The amount of show rather than tell is fairly distracting, with the entire meat of the relationship relegated to backstory. There’s still something here though. Perhaps in the way it deals with long-distance relationships and just distance in general. Maybe the hopeless romantic in me resonates with the plight of two idiots with thousands of miles between them. See if it works for you?
The Edges of the Atmosphere Miaou Jones (miaoujones)
There should be some sort of law that states that confessions in cryde stories have to be some level of stupid or convoluted. These two are physically incapable of expressing such feelings to each other in any standard normie way. So enjoy some classic spaceman Craig tropes while Clyde juggles being cute and awkward like a pro. Trigger warning for some racy hand-holding action; we’re talking interlocking fingers here.
Standby Flier Cheesebirb (Hi Mark ;)
So upfront, this story isn’t even a romance quite honestly. It’s just a cute bromance sort of affair at most, in which the boys share a hotel room together while waiting on a flight back home. You could quite certainly interpret it as the start of something deeper, as the fic gladly provides hints to support it; however there’s nothing to see here apart from the two personalities bouncing off each other, and sometimes that’s enough. A memorable little story that might resonate that little bit extra if you’re a frequent traveler.
Bust and Boom Azul_Bleu
Clyde fumbling with the realization that he’s got the hots for Craig isn’t new ground, that’s about the only ‘downside’ I could give this story. What it does with this premise however is deliver some pitch-perfect characterizations, snappy pacing, a good variety of settings, and some surprisingly touching moments given its brevity. It’s also loaded with lines that stand up off the page and stick with you and those are always worth their weight in gold; the author really squeezes a lot out of the short word count.
Forts Can Be Fun wendybirb
In which little Craig builds a pillow fort and little Clyde is invited. It’s a soft story with some cute exchanges, if you’re looking for a more innocent kid-cryde vibe then this one can scratch the itch. Short and sweet by definition. Go read it and give yourself a little smile.
Ennui dsfgajkh
This simple story’s a real blink and you’ll miss it; detailing some introspective thoughts Clyde’s having about the monotony of small town life and his fascination with his much more interesting best friend. At nearly a decade old, this story pre-dates Pandemic, which solidified the usual stoic Craig tropes that came after so it’s an awesome little time capsule back to those days where apathetic Clyde and flamboyant Craig was as good a guess as any. There’s a line about skittles that makes it worth the ten minute read.
Neighbors Vampiracy
So remember that time that Vampiracy wrote one of the most realistic and precious depictions of little Craig and Clyde playing with toy trucks in the backyard, but then it got buried in the depths of tumblr? Try not to smile when Clyde beams over the prospect of making a new friend and being able to show off the hole he’s dug; I completely and utterly dare you. Bratty Craig is my spirit animal and I’d die for more adventures with him at the Donovan house. I’m such a sucker for cutesy pre-school fluff I swear; just like you will be when you’re done reading this.
Shine On How You Shine On Miaou Jones (miaoujones)
Real talk? I’m a sucker for all things Brokeback Mountain, and this fic’s just neatly slotting in Craig and Clyde as the cowboys sharing a rough and confusing night in a tent together. The story is exactly what you’d think if you’ve read the original, and it hits all the same thematic beats. Guilty pleasure alert in full here. If you’re in the mood for hearing Clyde Twist tense up as Craig Delmar spits on his hand behind him then I won’t judge if you don’t. I’d unironically read ten more chapters.
Two Weeks toddintops
Yeah-yeah I know I’m stretching the definition of fic with this one, it’s barely a half thousand words; but hey, better five hundred words that make you feel something than ten thousand that leave you feeling the same. A short, sharp dose of angst with some beautiful art accompanying, what have you got to lose? Something about Clyde’s smile, coupled with the bittersweet lines near the end has always managed to stay with me. Maybe it’ll strike a chord with you too.
UNFINISHED (BUT STILL GREAT)
Ask Craig obitotxt (Password is 12345)
Hop on board the angst express; with the last stop being yourself when you realize the story comes crashing off the rails and never hits the end. Is the fact this blog never reached a conclusion one of the great tragedies of our modern era? Yeah, kinda. Fact is, this is probably the only cryde-centric askblog-formatted story out there; and yeah, it’s hyperbolic at times, but goddamn if it doesn’t make you feel something. Packed to the brim with boys being boys, memorable moments and just so much heart, you’ll be pressing F (and F5) for days after you reach the final unfinished pages.
One More Year llexxii
And here’s a weird way to recommend something: you probably don’t want to read this one. It’s very long, it’s very dead, and it has a fairly submissive Craig coupled with a rather unlikable rendition of Clyde. So why’m I even talking about this, and really, I’ve not got much of an answer for you. Just that this fic, despite everything, has some consistently excellent writing. The flashback scenes to Craig and Clyde as young kids are total gems. There’s stuff to love here, and maybe it could have been something great; if nothing else, maybe check it out as an interesting look into the ships history.
Turn It Around, Get a Rewrite wendybirb
This one hurts, in just about every respect. Prepare for angst story wise as we follow along with the life and times of Craig, reconnecting with a clearly troubled yet desperately pining Clyde, who seems scared shitless about his dying claims to heterosexuality. I genuinely love this story. It’s raw and emotional and angry and sexy, it comes across messy and real and does an amazing job making you care about the boys while also showing their more frustrating attributes. I’m still holding out hope it’ll one day take its place with the greats, but until then, the hardest gut-punch is always that “unfinished” tag.
January White (Love Is a Stain) Dovakiin
Here we’ve got a different kind of tragedy. The usual formula is a promising author burning out after an amazing opening run, but here we’ve got a story that never even made it past the kickoff. It’s such a shame. The eponymous metaphor and the solemn tone throughout is honestly pretty captivating; I would love to see how this take on the characters would have played. Spare ten minutes from your day and give yourself something to reflect on with this abandoned beginning.
NOT FULL CRYDE, BUT CLOSE ENOUGH
ask MARSH and BROFLOVSKI jovishark
You know what? Fuck it. I’m putting this one here and no one can stop me. This ask blog is practically fandom required reading at this point, and I couldn’t in good conscience not mention it. Stan and Kyle answer your questions, the plotline reads like something from a CW show, and Craig and Clyde don’t even end up together. I love it genuinely. If you pressed me, this story might be what got me into the fandom; pressed me harder, it’s what got me into cryde (again ironic as cryde isn’t endgame here). Always worth a read or a re-read. Pretend Craig and Clyde sorted things out in college if you need to.
Brace Yourself skyline
Okay so it’s a style story, let’s get that elephant in the room well and truly pointed out from the outset. If it’s a deal breaker for you that cryde isn’t the focus, then move along, but I guarantee for those that stay, there’s a charmingly written cryde side-ship playing out in tandem to Stan’s quest to win over his super best friend. There’s a lot to love about this story, the writings sharp and surprisingly powerful at times, and the characters are a joy to watch. Watching the cryde story unfold from Stan’s POV is a unique experience that you won’t really find anywhere else.
Remove Before Flight skyline
So remember Brace Yourself from literally just one entry up? Okay, same concept, same author. This is a different timeline in which Kenny’s the lucky protagonist trying to win Kyle’s heart, but like before, you’re treated to an enjoyable cryde sub-plot playing on in the background of the K2 drama. The writing’s still on-point, the characters are still great; if you liked the authors other story (which I’d advise reading first), you’ll definitely enjoy this one too. It’s cute how Craig and Clyde always seem destined for each other in this universe.
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caps-lockdown · 5 years ago
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Sweater Weather Part Three
Alrighty everyone, as anticipated here is part three of this crazy fic that I hope everyone is enjoying! 
A SMALL NOTE: THIS CHAPTER HAS A FIGHT THAT KIND OF RIPPED MY HEART OUT TO WRITE BUT I PROMISE IT WILL BE OK! Also more Steamy! Steve. 
Pairings: Steve Rogers x PottsRelativeFem!Reader
Ratings/Warnings: 18+ (Not smut but just to cover my ass)
For everything from language, crude jokes, ADULT situations/impure thoughts, booze (because it’s pretty much a staple in my fics at this point.), arguments, and an extremely overprotective Tony Stark. Very little angst, as I try to keep most of my fics light humored. But of course there are some insecurities/unsure feelings, as well as sad feels from everything with endgame/ the decimation. Also dead parents.
Also AU in the fact NO ONE DIED during Endgame/Steve didn’t go back. Also as much as I adore Morgan Stark, she isn’t around yet. I didn’t know where this would fit timeline wise, so just ignore the timeline. Kay? Cool.
Words: 4,178 (Ish)
Summary: You’ve just moved to New York after a long 3 year stint travelling the world and helping with various charities, taking a new job with Stark Industries thanks to your cousin Pepper. A trip out to surprise Tony and The Avengers for the weekend turns from good to terrible when the a/c at the compound breaks. How will you beat the heat for the record breaking weekend?
It’s in Y/N Y/L/N format, any pictures, outfits, gifs, and marvel characters just assume I don’t own them. Also no Beta, as I don’t ever have one, so the mistakes and reader are all my own. Enjoy!
Part Three
Ten –thirty am came with an unapologetic sun glaring into your room, the air slightly hot around you. You sat upright, bringing the phone to your face to look at the temperature. Ninety-nine degrees already. Rubbing your face and stretching your legs you forced yourself from your bed, grabbing your duffle bag and slowly opening your door to the hallway. You halted as you nearly stepped on the lone coffee mug that sat in front of your room, a smile gracing your lips as you inhaled the scent of freshly brewed coffee. You didn’t waste a moment of time, taking a drink from the overly-sweet drink with a happy sigh as you began to pad towards the showers of the Compound. Blissfully ignorant to the eyes that sought you out from behind a corner.
“Schk…Chocolate chip cookie has taken the bait and is moving west. Over.” Sam’s voice came in patchy as he held the large, old walkie talkie to his mouth, Bucky rolled his eyes from further on in the building.
“I thought we were going to call her French Toast? Over.”
“We’ll save that for later. Cookie is headed towards showers. Over.”
“Copy. Sending in Agent Star Spangled and Sexy. Over.” Rogers huffed in annoyance at the nickname as Bucky gave him a playful nudge towards your location.
“I’ll keep an eye out for Captain Cockblock. Over.”
“Why did I agree to this?” Steve asked out loud, slowly making his way towards the showers. This was absolutely one of the stupidest things he’s ever had to be a part of. And he had been in some stupid things. But he was crazy about you, and couldn’t wait to see you this morning, even if he had been a touch disappointed that you hadn’t snuck into his room last night. He woke up to Sam and Bucky smiling at him from the edge of his bed, and had almost gone into cardiac arrest upon opening his eyes. He most definitely would have preferred you, but he had to admit the two men using old walkie talkies from the eighties so Tony couldn’t hack into them was pretty damn clever. If this worked out with you then he’d be sure to thank them for their efforts.
He could hear your humming mixed with the sound of the shower as he rounded a corner, opting to lean against the wall holding the door that led to you. It was already warm in the compound but thinking about you in the shower wasn’t helping him keep his cool. He rubbed the back of his neck, trying to chase those thoughts of you away. He hadn’t slept much last night to begin with, mostly due to the dreams you had invaded that woke him up in a cold sweat. He couldn’t get you out of his mind since the moment you got out of your truck yesterday afternoon, and he was done not going after what he wanted. Tony be damned, you were going to know how he felt.
“I feel like a creep.” He said to no one, trying to steady his breathing as he heard the water shut off, your movements nearly silent as you continued to get ready for the long hot day.
You were still humming as you changed into your outfit for the day, the cool shower helping you wake up and prepare for whatever lay ahead. A quick look in the mirror and you felt pretty damn cute.
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You were towel drying your hair as you walked out, now empty coffee mug in one hand as you ran the fabric over your head with the other.
“Your shorts get any shorter Doll and we’re going to have a problem.” You jumped at the thick voice coming from your right, almost dropping and shattering the coffee mug on the hard floor. You hadn’t even noticed him standing there in a tight gray tank top and jeans. The bulging muscles of his arms and shoulders were quick to distract you, your eyes gazing at his body in appreciation. Well damn.
“No one asked you to look Rogers.” You replied curtly, throwing the towel off your hair and catching the smirking blonde in the face as you turned to leave. Casually swaying your hips you fought to contain the smirk as he caught up with you. You continued to stare ahead, gathering your hair up into a messy bun at the top of your head. Maybe Pepper had made breakfast.
“But I am looking Sweetheart. And I have to say that it’s going to be my new favorite past time.”
You turned your head to smile at him, his blue eyes never leaving yours as you stepped closer to him.
“Well then that makes two of us.” You breathed out, reaching a hand to brush away a stray strand of hair out of his face.
“Oh really?” His eyes closed at your touch, your fingers skimming down his face to rest on his cheek, feeling his own hand coming over to grip your waist.
“Duh. I’m pretty sure I could kiss you all day and not get tired of it.” You whispered, watching him take in a shaky breath.
“Then what are you waiting for Doll?” You grinned when you found him nuzzling his face into your palm and you moved to stand on your tiptoes, beginning to close the distance.
“GOOD MORNING SHORT STACK!”
The two of you groaned in frustration as you broke apart from your almost moment, Tony giving you a cheeky smile as he waved you into the kitchen. Your eyes flicked to Steve’s in a silent apology, stepping away and heading into the dining room where Pepper had set up nothing short of a feast for everyone. You chose a seat on the right side of the table, hiding your elated smile as Steve sat next to you. Well, until your cousin in law decided to take it upon himself to drag his own chair in between the two of you, causing everyone at the table to glare at him.
“Hope you like pancakes. Cap be a dear and pass the syrup will ya?” Stark settled in at his new spot, taking a plate and piling on four giant pancakes. You gripped your fork tightly as he beamed at you while drizzling the sugary liquid over his breakfast, Pepper looking ready to murder her husband and hide the evidence. “Maybe a couple for you Y/N? HA! A short stack for short stack!”
“We can make it look like an accident.” Sam murmured to Bucky, who was nodding enthusiastically at the idea as he shoveled eggs onto his plate. Steve looked absolutely fed up. Everyone ate in a tense silence, you nearly choking the life out of Tony when he would ask you questions about your day that hadn’t even started yet. You were too sober for this. And too short on caffeine. You had missed your cousin too, but if you had known any better you would have guessed he was purposefully getting in between you and Steve. That shit was going to get old real quick.
“So what’re your plans for the day Y/N? It’s supposed to be a hundred and five by noon.” Nat asked cautiously, trying to defuse the obvious tension. You smiled at her.
“Actually I planned on working on a small project. Speaking of which, you don’t mind me raiding the supply rooms around here right cousin? After all I was mostly inspired by you for it.” Stark’s eyes softened as he made his second plate of food, stopping to hold his fork over his heart.
“Not at all Y/N! I’m touched at being your inspiration.” Pepper let out a bark of laughter at her husband, him turning to look at her with a blank expression. “What? At least someone appreciates me.”
“Great! Then I’m going to get started. Steve you mind helping me out? Some of the things I need are heavy and I’m going to need all the muscle I can wrangle up.” Tony’s face of annoyance didn’t go amiss to anyone as the blonde man matched your stunning smile with one of his own.
“’Course Doll, lead the way.” Both of you pushed from your chairs, Nat smiling into her bite of pancake as the two of you strolled away.
“I told you Tony, she isn’t going to let you get in her way. You might as well just give up. They look cute together. It could be what they both need…after everything.” Pepper tried patting his hand soothingly, the older gentleman glaring at his plate before sliding it away from him. Standing from his seat, he gave a small nod to his teammates and began to walk after you.
“Not on my watch.” He grumbled, guided by your melodic giggles as you and Steve entered the elevator together. “Friday, please inform me of Y/N’s whereabouts when she gets to a stopping point.”
“Of course Mister Stark.” The AI responded cheerfully.
“That was pretty smooth back there Y/N.” Steve admitted, chuckling at you as you pulled open the doors to the main supply room. You nodded, beginning your search wordlessly for the things you needed. “What, uh, what is it you’re looking for exactly?”
“I’m sorry that information is classified.” You watched the man before you quirk an eyebrow, before putting his hands in his pockets and admitting defeat. One of the best qualities of Steve was that he always dropped the subject when he needed to. He never pried into your life, but he also hadn’t really been a part of it for at least the last three years.
“So what am I doing here?”
‘”Just stand there and look pretty for right now Rogers. You are exceptionally gifted in that department.” His lips fell in a flat line as he playfully stared you down, you blowing him a kiss before turning back to the task at hand.
It didn’t take you too terribly long to find what you needed, maybe an hour. You managed to gather several old oscillating stand up fans, a bunch of small desktop ones, a couple Styrofoam coolers, and PVC pipe. You began piling it up at Steve’s feet, his curiosity peaking as you brushed the dust off your hands.
“I got a drill set in the truck that should work, you think Snark has a small portable jigsaw somewhere?” You knew Steve wouldn’t have the answer, but he didn’t have time to think of a response anyway.
“Of course I do Short Stack!”
“Snark are you making it a point to creepily follow me everywhere? I know you missed me but damn give a girl a break to breathe.” You ground out, anger flaring up in your veins as Tony only met the two of you with a grin.
“I just wanted to make sure you were okay. I know Capsicle here can only do so much. He’s got the brawn, but not all the brains I’m afraid.” The dig only seemed to piss you off more, noticing Steve’s jaw clench and his fists tighten.
“Steve sweetheart, do me a huge favor and take what you can and drop them off at my room? My cousin and I need to have a chat.” You didn’t have to ask him again as he gathered pretty much everything in one arm load and left the room, walking back towards the elevator. After making sure he was out ear shot you fixed your face in a menacing glare at your target.
“What in the hell was that Tony?!” You nearly shouted, your cousin crossing his arms over his chest in defiance as he refused to back down.
“Don’t act like I’m dumb Y/N. You and Steve have been on each other like shit on Velcro since you got here. I’m not letting someone close to me get hurt, especially after everything that’s happened over the last couple years!”
“Are you talking about me, or Steve?” You demanded darkly, noticing how he flinched as you took a step towards him. “Because either damn way, we’re grown adults and can make our own decisions. You don’t get a say in the matter! I don’t know why you seem to care so much anyway.”
“BECAUSE SIX MONTHS AGO HE ALMOST WENT BACK TO PEGGY!” Tony yelled, your face dropping as you took a step back. Was that true? What the hell was he still doing here then? You knew Peggy Carter and him had an unfinished history, but you had no idea he was considering actual time travel to be with her. The brunette sighed deeply, lowering his voice and you could feel his concern as he went to reach for you, you drawing your hands back as if he would burn you.
“He sat there and debated for weeks about it! You’re more than a convenient piece of ass Y/N, and you deserve better. Better than a man who hasn’t spoken to you in over three years! Or are you going to choose to ignore how easily he forgot about you during the accords situat…”
Your slap on his face echoed through the room, your eyes glistening with tears as you pulled your hand back. “Don’t you dare. He isn’t the only guilty party in that equation Snark, and you fucking know it. You know my feelings for him have never changed, and I lost one of my closest friends because of your bullshit. Don’t you dare say that to me.”
“I’m sorry I just…”
“You want to look out for me? How about you let me off the invisible leash so I can live my damn life!? You’re making me start to regret coming back at all!” You spat, pushing past the man and grabbing the small desktop fan on your way out, making sure to slam the door. You inhaled sharply, turning to find Steve waiting for you patiently, the elevator door being propped open by one of the large fans. Neither of you said anything as you stepped in, Steve removing the fan and allowing the door to close. The bell tone as you descended was the only sound. The walk to your room was silent as well, besides the shuffling noise of the fan cords across the floor. It was torture for both of you.
“Thanks for the help Rogers.” You said, your voice void of any emotion as you opened your door, helping the blonde put the things in your room before leaving it again.
“No problem Y/N.” He avoided your gaze, your sad expression too much for him. He hated seeing you upset, and although he hadn’t heard much of the conversation you and Tony had, he knew you had found out about Peggy. With your cousin’s yelling, he was one hundred percent sure everyone in the compound had heard it. “Listen, uh about your talk with Tony.”
“Don’t.” You warned, eyes turning into daggers as you began to walk away. True to his nature the blonde Avenger didn’t press, only nodded and left you alone to gather the things you needed from your truck, including the giant orange rectangular cooler that you hadn’t used. Nat watched you struggle, angrily wiping at the tears that had begun to fall and rushed to help you. She didn’t ask, she just helped you lug the large chest back inside. When you returned once again to your room you found the small saw sitting against your door.
“What else ya need Y/N?” Nat inquired gently, touching your shoulder as you got out the last of your sobs.
“Do we have any ice in the walk in freezer? I need all that we have. Also if you can find me any tape, plastic water bottles, and rock salt.” The red head nodded, disappearing shortly from view as you shut your door. “Friday, do me a solid and do NOT allow Tony Stark to enter this room?”
“Alright miss Y/N.” You set to work after the confirmation, beginning by measuring and cutting two holes in each lid of every cooler you had acquired. Yours took a minute to get through, the Styrofoam no match for the small but powerful saw Tony had left for you. At least he did something useful today. When Nat returned with Thor and Sam you smiled brightly at them, already in a slightly better mood. You graciously accepted their supplies, the two men leaving as you and Nat continued to work under your direction. You pulled up your phone and dialed Kate’s number, needing to hear her voice.
“Hey Y/N. How’s it hanging?”
“I’m about to murder my cousin.”
“Ohh. Is it Tony? I got a shovel and an alibi you just tell me where to meetcha!” You chuckled at Kate, Nat’s own laughter music to your ears.
“Who else is with you? Are they in on the murder or will we have to take care of them later?”
“Hang on I’ll video chat you.” You hung up and brought up the facetime app, your best friend’s cheesy smile coming to life shortly in front of you. “Ok Kate. Meet Natasha.”
You were regretting your decision less than ten solid minutes later, after you brought both women up to current knowledge on what had taken place. The two women were laughing and getting on like two peas in a pod and you were starting to feel replaced. You huffed, dumping the ice into the coolers after securing the small fans and PVC pipe to the lids. Nat worked on filing the bottles with icy salt water, sealing them up and taping them to the large stand up fans, Kate “Oooh” and “Aww”ing when everything was finished.
“Look at you Y/N! Should start calling you MacGyver. Where did you learn this stuff?!”
“Picked up this life hack while helping out a small village in Brazil. We lost our AC in the van for a week. There should be enough for everyone to have something in their rooms for the rest of the weekend.”
“My babe you are a SAINT and none of those assholes deserve you. Not including you Natasha.” Nat waved off Kate’s comment, knowing full well it wasn’t directed at her. “I still can’t believe Tony had the audacity to say that to you. He better hope to fuck I don’t see him, or that cooler you jury rigged is going to become his damn casket.”
“This is why I love you Kate. Thank you. I just don’t know what to do about Steve now.” You let out a shaky breath, both the other women looking at you with sympathetic eyes. “I don’t want to believe Tony, but if it’s true…”
“Listen Y/N,” Nat leaned in to wrap an arm around your shoulder, “He didn’t leave. Steve doesn’t just want you as some kind of tension release. All the guy has talked about since you got here is how much he’s missed you. I’ve been his friend for a long ass time, and I know he’s cared about you for most of it. Just talk to the man.” She squeezed you in a half hug, Kate nodding in agreement.
“What Nat said. And after you have a heart to heart, jump on his dick.”
“KATE! You are the worst influence!”
Your best friend’s face feigned innocence. “Y/N! I don’t know what you’re talking about, I’m the best worst influence you got. You need to get laid. You might be less uptight after…”
“God. Goodbye Kate. Talk soon.” You went to rush her off the phone, face ablaze and Nat laughing to the point she couldn’t breathe properly.
“Bye bitch. Go get some!” She waved, you hanging up the app and clutching your forehead.
“I like her.” Nat got out between breaths.
“Go get the others please. Except Stark. ” You demanded, the red head giving you a half-assed salute and jumping out of the room. You had plugged in the large cooler for you room while she was gone, relishing in the cold air that was being pumped into it. You’d have to refill it after nightfall, but it would be the thing that saved you this weekend.
“What is all this?” Thor’s voice boomed as the door opened, you only acknowledging him with a large fan.
“Your redneck air conditioners. You’ll have to replace the ice to keep it going but it should help you all some in your rooms. Figured the coolers can go in the kitchen and living areas. We can move them around as need be.”
“You accomplished all of this in a matter of hours Y/N? You sure you don’t have super speed or something?” Sam stated, you beaming at him and coughing when Bruce threatened to hug the life out of you.
“You are an angel Y/N. Thank you.” You awkwardly patted the large green man on the back, letting him put you down before designating who took what. They filed into your room, all grabbing the appliances, each offering thanks before leaving. It did amazing things for your self esteem, knowing you could be of use after all this weekend.
“We’re going to grill tonight, keep unnecessary heat out of the compound. Meet me in the kitchen in an hour for prep?” Pepper asked cautiously, no doubt knowing about your fight with her husband earlier.
“Sure Pep, just make sure your husband stays away from me for right now. I’m not particularly fond of his existence currently.”
“You got it.” You laid down on your bed as your cousin left, shutting the door behind her. There was so much to process, and you really just wanted to nap, the temperature of the room slowly becoming more comfortable. A soft knock kept you from drifting off, you turning to your side as it cracked open to reveal a shy looking Steve Rogers.
“Can I help you Rogers?” Your tone was glass cutting sharp, the blonde wincing as he timidly stepped into your room.
“I just wanted to say thank you, for the uh, whatever you call that contraption you made. You’re a life saver, and uh, thanks.” He stammered, and you found your anger quickly melting away as he stood, shuffling his feet and not daring to make eye contact with you.
“You’re welcome Steve.” You caught the small upturn of his lips at you using his first name again, that little motion all you needed to melt into a puddle.
“I thought you were mad at me?” His whisper you nearly missed thanks to the sound your cooler was making, you leaning to sit up and giving him a head tilt. “About Peggy.”
“Ah.” You sighed, standing up to pad across the room, meeting him in your open doorway. “I want to be, but no matter how much I try I can’t. You didn’t go back, and it would be rather terrible of me to not understand where you were coming from. You’re here now. That’s all in the past, along with the years we haven’t kept in touch. Can we please promise each other to just leave it there? Start over?”
“I can do that.” He took your hand, pulling you into a gentle hug that warmed your body. You stood there for minutes, not saying anything but holding each other so tight it almost felt like the broken pieces of who you were started to put themselves back together. You didn’t want to pull away, and wondered if you two could make life work as permanently joined mass of limbs and brains. After all, he was always so warm and you found yourself freezing. Not to mention it would make getting things on the top shelf so much easier.
“I should go help Pepper with meal prep.” You uttered regretfully, forcing yourself to part from him.
“Yea, she’ll kill both of us if you’re late.” His statement forced a giggle from your lips as you went to leave, shutting the door behind both of you. “Save a seat for me?”
“Well I sure as hell ain’t sitting next to Tony. And if he sits in between us again I’ll just have to sit in your lap.” You teased, his eyes sparkling as he chuckled at your fading figure.
“Shck…Love Muffin is headed towards kitchen after brief rendezvous with Agent Sexy. No physical contact beyond a hug was initialized. Beginning to suspect agent is a complete punk who won’t man up. Over.” Bucky spoke confidently into the large black brick, Steve whipping around to glare at him murderously.
“Man, he don’t make a move soon imma be pissed off. This walkie talkie is heavy as fuck. Over.” Sam’s voice carried down the hall as Steve gave chase to his best friend.
“I’m going to put my foot so far up your ass Buck you’ll be spitting out leather for a month!” The blonde shouted, only getting a grin from his target in kind.
“Oooh kinky Captain. You gonna let Y/N in on your sadistic nature t..OW!”
The winter soldier found the compound walls to be super thick. And almost painful when pushed into them.
Tag List: @kaytizzle @cuffski @giggleberts @chrisevansfanfic @pies-wands-and-more @evanstush
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vivien-dot-exe · 5 years ago
Note
Ask meme - every todoroki :eyes:
lmao BET
(this is super big huge I’m so sorry askdfjsh)
Shouto
NOTP
I don’t?? really think I have one. I’m pretty alright w/ all shouto ships tbh.
BROTP
todomomo. I get the ships but I kinda see em as them Good Supportive Friends that are just close enough that everyone Thinks They’re Dating n cannot believe they’re not but like. they never would. (am I projecting my best friendship onto shouto?? Maybe. fuck off.)
OTP
rn?? enjishouto lmao. I love love enjishouto man,, favorite child lovin,,,,
second choice
I ~guessss~ todobaku?? but tbh I’m not all that into most shouto ships. like we neutral most days. we just stay lovin bakugou + denying they’re friends???? so cute man,,
tied though is reishouto bc mommy kink. I won’t sit here and lie to you I just love gentle mommy kink sm
fluffy pairing
cliche fan fave - tododeku. we love a pair of supportive boyfs. I still do like seeing some tododeku art sometimes cause it makes our heart warm
angsty pairing
enjishouto again - I play things for angst so fuckin much dude,, if I can’t play my otp for angst then it probably isn’t gonna stick.
poly ship
can I say like. natsu/fuyu/enji/shouto. cause siblings that thirst over their hot dad together stay together
however hawks/enji/shouto is an incredibly tasty rarepair. there’s only one fic for it on ao3 but it’s So dang good,, 
weirdest pairing
I guess still enjishouto!! I have a very small amount of ships for the boy, man,,
Fuyumi
NOTP
n/a once again. every fuyumi ship I’ve seen to date or conjure up from crack shipping is cute bc she’s cute. I love seeing her in general.
BROTP
lowkey?? fuyuhawks. I can see them being excellent friends. I know romance takes are also good but. consider this: them chillin and acting goofy.
OTP
fuyunatsu. no question. it was my v first fuyumi ship and I will go down with it. (more explanation below)
second choice
fuyumi/miruko is really good!! maybe that’s just me being all ‘lesbians good’ @ the few fics n art pieces I’ve seen but Still.
fluffy pairing
reiyumi. we Love a girl n her mom huggin tight n kissing softly.
angsty pairing
fuyuenji. I’ve seen such good angst w/ these two man,, makes my heart heart Good ya feel?? them sad n guilty daddy’s girl feels Get Me
poly ship
sibling thorst: the ship (fuyu/natsu/enji/shouto)
weirdest pairing
if I was to make up a weird pairing,,,, bakuyumi. they interact Once but I like ships that are basically ‘we cook and it’s romantic’ (read: natsuki from ddlc anyone?). it’s a lil crack shippy and I’ve never ever seen any material for it, but wouldn’t it be cute to have bakugou cook w/ a cute older woman n have a cute romantic time while he’s all tsundere?? sighs wistfully,,
Natsuo
NOTP
hmm,, I’m honestly thinking I should take this option out. I really do think it cute to think the whole ass todofam w/ Anybody you know??
BROTP
natsushouto. like wow great job viv takin it Literally but as we don’t know much about natsu’s college life, I can’t exactly elect a best friend or nothin, and I Really love the concept of natsu and shouto acting like regular sibs. fighting n competing but hyping each other up, ya know?? sighs wistfully,, I actually really love brotherly dynamics a lot. like shipping em is usually my first thought but I also just???? like seeing em play around n be normal sometimes lmao. is that weird?? that it makes me happy?? idk.
OTP
fuyunatsu!! I love the concept of them constantly being there for each other, plus childish curiosity?? if you got sibs you know what that shit’s like. “you wanna try kissing??”
like listen not to be gross about it either but like. Puberty w/ that like entirety of the house to themselves. you can not tell me horny things never happened.
second choice
enjinatsu has Mad potential. I don’t get to see a lot of content for them but they make my heart happy. love the idea of both them being sweet to each other slowly in a path to forgiveness dotted with confessions and soft embraces,,,, or of course guilty dad thirst. both are Tasty
fluffy pairing
fuyunatsu is Cute. listen I want em to cuddle and support each other though they’re so different. like foils, ya know?? I am very weak for natsu having a weakness for fuyumi’s gentleness (though that could be said for the whole todofam. stan fuyumi)
angsty pairing
hmm,, I guess that’d be enjinatsu?? path to forgiveness enjinatsuo I can see being v feelsy and Tasty.
poly ship
sibling thorst Again.
weirdest pairing
man I don’t think any of these could be counted as Not weird. enjinatsu maybe?? as their dynamic is rather complicated n versatile + parent/child. I think the Least weird ship I’ve ever considered w/ him though would be natsuhawks, but I’ve not seen a lot of material for them nor do I have any ideas for dynamics. they just look nice together.
Touya (dabi)
NOTP
okay I’ll be real w/ you I lied I do have One notp and it’s dabihawks (hotwings). it’s. it’s okay, I’ll admit, but it kinda squicks me out in canon verses. like, reverse aus, genderswap aus, most aus really that slightly shift the dynamic, I’m good w/ dabihawks, but Not In Canon or any approximations of it.
(big rant on why, feel free to skip)
I guess antis just kinda fucked it up for me?? I was kinda neutral when it first was proposed, ya know like ‘oh that’s cute!! not for me but more power to ya!!’ but then dabihawks shippers started getting in hawksdeavor shippers’ faces n giving the usual arguments against age gap ships (as if a villain/hero ship was so uwu pure n unproblematic), and then there came the ‘hawks will betray the heroes and become a villain for dabi’ theories from them and it just. that was 2018 and it Still makes me uncomfortable to think about. 
I very much enjoyed hawks’ double agent thing!! but I knew an infiltration mission would end with betrayal from the beginning and that’s what I liked about it. him doing the absolute Most for the heroes even if it feels scummy to do so. I was Devastated for a moment when I saw hawks’ first meetup w/ dabi and it looked like he might be spying for them, but then we were quickly assured that it was a ploy and I was like Oh My God Thank God I Near Had A Heart Attack. but other people, the loudest group being dabihawks shippers, were dissatisfied with this and wanted canon to take a different direction and I Dunno Man, I just had very strong emotions about that and still do. 
I love hero hawks in all his double agent endeavor fanboy glory and people wanting to take it a different direction in canon felt like a blatant kind of???? idk defacing of character almost, even though that’s a mega mega mega dramatic way to put it loL don’t ask me why I got such strong feelins about it I couldn’t explain it if I wanted. I’d love to go back to being chill about it I really really would.
BROTP
idk, I think I might not???? have one for him. he seems kinda all or nothing to me, very intense w/ his emotions. if I was to Name one off the top of my head, maybe maybe togadabi, but even then I’m kinda hm on it.
OTP
first and favorite dabi ship is 1000% shigadabi. not even in most canon settings; I just like them chilling and being lovey (and going on large scale crime dates).
second choice
probably shoutodabi?? not Big on most dabi ships but love that older bro angst.
fluffy pairing
shigadabi bby!! if I wanna imagine dabi soft ever then shigadabi is a Lovely escape, canon absolutely notwithstanding.
natsutouya is also a good one to imagine, what w/ the image of them cuddling making my heart Warm
angsty pairing
shoutodabi. I saw this one reunion fic of them and I had So Many Emotions oh my god.
dabihaul is also a good candidate, though it’s less Angst more hurt little comfort. (not to mention I don’t ship it much myself lol a friend sold me on their interp) it’s not very emotional as I like my angst, more just got them whump aesthetics.
poly ship
good question. I’ve highkey not thought about it smH - maybe if I just,,,, *takes shoutodabi n shigadabi n smooshes them together*
idek how that’d work as a dynamic dude I Don’t KnoW LMAO
weirdest pairing
I guess enjidabi?? I think about it from time to time but I dunno how the dynamic would work but. very angsty whatever it is. lots of apology sexy times in my mind’s eye.
Rei
NOTP
n/a - rei is definitely one I will take any ship for.
BROTP
enjirei - I’m doing this out of order so I wrote the explanation on enji’s lmaO see below for details
OTP
oh man otp???? good question,, I’m a v big fan of reishouto tho. gentle mom lovin,,
second choice
rei/inko is also a good one!! something I still think is very cute from my early days in the fandom. just a couple of moms supporting each other and going on cute park dates,,
fluffy pairing
rei/inko is def the fluffiest. however, it can be argued that rei/anybody has good fluff material. rei is so,,,, ethereal lookin???? she looks like a flower or a ghost,, like breeze rustling sheer curtains in an empty sun lit room. gentle on the eyes but hella poignant. I can imagine her bein soft w/ everyone n everyone.
angsty pairing
reitouya. For Sure. rei taking care of her lost eldest who’s finally come home, ya know???? Sobs,,,,,,,, I don’t see shippy content of them ever but reunion fics/art Get Me
poly ship
this one might be a little weird, but inko/rei/mitsuki. I’ve only seen material for it Once but in my head it’s taking the cute mom ships of inko/rei and inko/mitsuki to make the Ultimate Supportive Mom Ship. and maybe masaru is there too supporting this bc I think he’s really good tbh I don’t want him sad or lonely.
weirdest pairing
uhhhhhh,,, idk man probably polyship is the only “Weird”/super rare one. mitsuki ain’t exactly gentle mom:tm: after all, but I think her spice goes well w/ it all, ya know?? inko n rei being gentle and mitsuki being the hype who arranges more fun dates n such for them to all take a cuddle pile nap afterwards,, and you know she’s the hype woman for the trio. 
Enji
NOTP
never met an enji ship I didn’t like tbh. they’re all good and I will fight on that.
BROTP
highkey?? enjirei. I ship em romantically sometimes, but I really like the idea of them divorced and getting other lovers but supporting each other fullheartedly. love that solidarity. like shit I could see them still living together n such but they just. drop the husband/wife shtick and support each other like friends.
OTP
enjishouto!! y’all been knew.
second choice
hawksdeavor is a longstanding fave. we love that fanboy/idol dynamic sm,,
fluffy pairing
oh jeez fluffy,, maybe enji/burnin?? I can see her being very energetic n supportive and being rewarded w/ soft forehead kisses. soft boss crush even if it’s one sided.
angsty pairing
both enjishouto and hawksdeavor provide Wonderful angst. the flavor is Immaculate y’all should try it.
poly ship
enji/the rest of the todofam/hawks/happiness. pls lma o
I am very much an enjibowl enthusiast, can y’all tell?? I just want him Smothered in love sometimes.
weirdest pairing
hmm,, enji/tsukauchi. I saw a doujin for it once and it was Lovely. an absolute crackship, but I love the hero/detective dynamic of toshinori/tsukauchi, but toshinori just doesn’t give it enough Spice in most interps I see. now enji being tsun n aggressive + level headed detective tsukauchi,, that was a tasty doujin for sure.
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whatevenismyaestheticidk · 5 years ago
Text
Things I’ve heard high schoolers say pt 2
Person 1: But air doesn’t splash Person 2: How do we know that, Im splashing the air right now.
Person: Prove me wrong. Prove fish can’t see air.
Person: I think you underestimate just how poor I am.
Person: I just invented a new thing. No Romo. Like no homo but with romance cause I’m lonely. Get it?
Person: So yah I burned my hair cooking ramen.
Person: Well I figured he wasn’t an adopted iguana.
Person: Say it. You know god is watching.
Person 1 upon heading the news of George Bush’s death: Wait he’s still alive? Person 2: No he’s dead that’s the point.
Person: I got it. *five second pause* no I don’t got it.
Person 1: My name is (name), but you can call me yours. Person 2: Okay nice to meet you yours.
Person: Don’t drink it all fool.
Person: Bruh you could literally turn in a gay fanfic and he’d give it an A.
Person: Bruh, what is this triangular accusation?
Person 1:It’s call physics. Person 2: Yah but I don’t take Physics hence they should not apply to me.
Person 1: Discreet. Person 2: No discr-yeet *dabs*
Person 1: Be impressed with my ability to bull shit. Person 2: I mean, it’s gotten you this far.
Person: Why do I feel like finals are lowkey Russian roulette? Like okay I made it through most of them but I still have a few pulls of the trigger to go and one of them might get me.
Person 1: Murder. Just do it. Person 2: I didn’t know that nike was sponsoring murder.
Person: How do mermaids reproduce if they’re just like conjoined legs?
Person 1: Frozen Yogurt Person 2: Fro yo Person 1: Frozen YOgUrt Person 2: Fro Yo Person 1: FROZEN YOGURT
Person: All I have to do to commit suicide is jump from my parents expectations to my grades.
Person 1: I mean yah I cheated on that test. Person 2: Man your love life it DOOMED!
Person: I was seeing if I was tripophobic by repeatedly stabbing my finger with my pen.
Person: You do know that crickets exist during the day right?
Person 1: Hey (person 2), we’re friends right? Person 2: ….. What do you want. Person 1: You know, that sandwich looks real good. *person 2 hand them the sandwich* OMIGOD THANK YOU SO MUCH I LOVE YOU!
Person: Omigod (person’s name) is going through puberty!
Person: If you pulled my ear I would have ripped out your nostril.”
Person 1: She’s attacking me! Person 2: No, he’s beating a woman, that’s not polite.
Person 1: I know many things! Person 2: like what? Person 1: ..... Person 2: my point.
Person: My shoes will be sparkly red stilettos. Fight me Dorothy.
Person: umm hello Christmas miracle even though I’m not Christian. Come at me 15 years from now!
Person 1: you’d make a really good baldie Person 2: yah you have a really rest head shape
Person: you know teletubbies? Yah that but compressed.
Person 1: I mean how will you become American? Person 2: paint me white, I’ll get a passport.
Person 1: I’m so funny. Person 3: it’s hard not to be when your life is a joke.
Person 1: So I’ve decided that my new career choice is to make school specific memes Person 2: That's Plan A? Yeash... at least Plan B lands you some cash
Person: I’m so small and bitter I’m like a human expresso
Person: You know what I’d name a baby kangaroo if I had one? David Jowie.
Person: I’m just saying that the orange red glitter crayon is you.
Person: I feel like a 1940’s schoolgirl who goes to an all girl finishing school where embroidery is a required class.
Person: I started high school with straight A’s, now I’m not even straight.
Person: Yeah, I’d swear by comic sans.
Person: (Persons name)stop being depressy and you’ll be more sucessy
Person: You can totally be insecure and self absorbed at the same time.
Person 1: Are you kids okay? Person 2: Besides crippling depression yeah.
Person: I don’t know it’s just giving me pig vibes.
Person: What drugs where the animators for “Pink Elephants on Parade” on?
Person: long story short I make like a semi hot guy.
Person: If I where pregnant id just be like 'you put this thing inside of me, you're helping me until it's out.'
Person: These girls asked me what type of  guys I like and being the simple gay I am, I completely blanked
Person 1: why do you read on your phone if you get carsick at 20 minutes? Person 2:Because it works for the first 19 minutes.
Person: Three Indians, a Thai, a Colombian, and an American walk into a bar. Just kidding they aren't old enough to drink. Three Indians, a Thai, a Colombian, and an American walk into a school cafeteria...
Person: I can't do alcohol cause I'm not of age but I can do drugs because they're illegal for everyone.
Person 1: you can't have a breakdown, it's the third day of school. Person 2:... so?
*Group of kids singing Bohemian Rhapsody in twelve different keys* Person: For gods sake choose a key!
Person: For gods sake that was complicated. You didn't need to send out a survey to see which episode of which season of which show to watch.
Person: Honestly I'd chose stab over dab any day.
Person 1: She said she'd throw me out of the window. Person 2: She never did. Person 1: She never did.
Person: What language is this? *pause* Oh wait it's English.
Person 1: I mean it's pretty hit or miss. Person 2 from across the courtyard: I guess they never miss, huh?
Person: Chu-chu bitch. I’m a train.
Person after loosing game of kahoots: I’m going to ka-shoot myself.
Person: So basically I need to learn Hungarian for a song.
Person: No one screams their sneeze, its not human
Person: If I where a mosquito I would bite you and you’d get malaria and die.
Person: That tide pod aesthetic.
Person: No I loved Barney, Barney was my bo.
Person: If I where my own boyfriend I’d dump me.
Person: It's already a really good song but then it's dubstep so it's extra good.
Person: No one is EVER to old for coolmathgames.com
Person 1: Why are you using a poon? Person 2:….. Person 1: WHY ARE YOU USING A POON?!
Person 1: I’ve been blonde for 16 years. Person 2: So what? I’ve been brown for 16 years and you don’t see me coloring myself white!
Person: Yes. Scrape the sweat off my hand.
Person: No one cares about a square cube of water.
Person: We’re melanin intoxicated.
Person: Well my life may be a mess, but at least I’m not doing drugs. Yet.
Person: Negative 13 out of 10, do not recommend.
Person: Yah that’s gunna have to be a no from me.
Person: Fool me once......fool me twice.......fool me as many times as you want, my first name is dumbass.
Person 1: Ya know, I think the Americans have the order of dates right JUST BECAUSE you can do 4/20/2019. Person 2: Okay but they’re still wrong though.
Person with AirPods: And where are YOUR AirPods? Thats what I thought you broke bitches.
Person: Salem witch trials bitches.
Person: La Croix, the AirPods of the soda world.
Person: Who needs a thermometer when you have… your hands!?
Person 1: It’s time to bring back SEXY MASQUERADE BALLS Person 2: It really is. I need an excuse to wear an incredibly uncomfortable dress that's so big I can't even walk through doorways. Person 1: And to wear a swan inspired mask that doesn’t cover enough of my face to deem myself totally anonymous enough to be half as bold and daring as i plan on acting that night but everyone else is on board we’ll all just forget about it the next day. Person 2: That's to specific for you to have made up on the spot, you've thought about this.
Person: It was lady Macbeth that drugged and made the guards drunk, without her Macbeth would just be like “I guess I’ll stab him???” Person: It’s like playing where’s Waldo but the page is India and I’m Waldo.3Person: Why are there so many frowny faces everywhere?
Person: This group chat is weird. It's either homework, deep philosophical conversations, or memes, there's no in between.
Person 1: Honestly, where DID it come from Person 2: The endless abyss that is the internet.
Person: Are you really blaming our generational depression on Jake Paul?
Person 1:  Oh. My. God. Guys. Keep your carbon dioxide away from my computer. Person 2: But sharing is caring. Person 1: But my computer doesn’t need this kinda of negativity in its life right now.
Person: Sweetie, if you think I’m going to stop wearing my favorite dress just because you kissed me in it, you are dead wrong.
Person with a metal straw: I don't drink broke.
Person: My whole life has become that sock on the floor. It's just there. When did life screw us over and then just ex? I’m just gonna write a book, and the last sentence will be life screwed them over and then exed. A story of the main character who gets screwed over, so I can get that 'it be like that sometimes' reaction.
Person in group chat: Positivity- I will make you feel better about being an idiot. Self Doubt- I will highlight all of your mistakes and set low standards for you so you'll never be disappointed. Me to Self Doubt- I'm listening...
Person 1: Sadly the disappointment never goes away... Person 2: Man we're a sad lot this time of year.
Person 1:It’s almost my favorite time of the year Person 2:Ahh yes. Singles awareness day, also known as chocolate sales at Walgreens eve, also known as... Valentine's Day. Person 1:... Oh... I meant rainy season.
Person: Being antivax is like swimming in shark infested waters because you're afraid the bridge could break lmao.
Person: I learned how eat a kumquat this weekend.
Person: It’s so sticky. It’s like clear cheese.
Person: Hamburger helper? More like hamburger help me pass this class.
Person 1: So I slipped on a grape… Person 2: You got K.O.’ed by a grape (person’s name), how does it feel.
Person 1: Look at me, I’m fine. Person 2: Well how many drugs did you take. Person 1: Several.
Person 1: Did you just say it’s ALMOST FEBRUARY? Person 2: Yes, it’s January 72nd.
Person: I knew your comedic standards where low, but poop jokes? Really?
Person: What? So are you insinuating the fact that reliablest isn't a word?
Person 1: [bitter old man voice] back in my day, tik tok was a kesha song. Person 2: Back in my day we had wires attached to our AirPods.
Person: There's a reason rainbows aren't straight. Just saying.
Person reading sheet music and seeing mf crescendo: I forgot that mezzo forte was a thing for a second so I thought it said mother fucker as a crescendo but mood
Person: He looks like a fine piece of toasted white bread.
Person: If life hasn't given me a fist bump by now, why should I give life one?
Person: we all died in 2012 this is hell.
Person 1: Who wants a pamphlet on condoms? Person 2: Why do you have this? Do you collect them? Person 1: Yah it’s my hobby. I have this one, one on HIV and one on teenage pregnancy.
Person: We live a society where reading about assassins and gory details is a hobby.
Person: Stop breathing so loudly on my thumb!
Person 1: I’m the comic relief. Person 2: For what? Person 1: Myself.
Person1: Who’s your valentine this year? Person 2: Me, myself and I. Person 1: Wow three valentines, you really can’t keep them away can you?
Person: Why do women gotta get their period, why not men. I wish I was born a seahorse.
Person 1: No we can’t all fit, her car is smol. Like you. Person 2:  Says you miss 5 foot nothing lmao. Person 1: Hey we’re the same hight so says you miss 5 foot nothing.
Person: No, that’s cheating no emotionally disabling people.
Person 1: Why is it that we’re talking about someone burning eggs on two different group chats. Person 2: Hey I didn’t burn them. Person 3: Cause why not?
Person 1:  That’s not how an Australian accent works. Person 2: This is why I’m not Australian, I don’t have the koala-fications.
Person 1: I’m Indian, numbers run through my blood. Person 2: That’s like saying I’m going to marry my cousin just because I’m white.
Person: So I ate veggies and hummus for lunch but then I counterbalanced it by eating a spoon full of straight Nutella.
Person: Seagulls, California Pigeons, what’s the difference?
Person 1: I humbly apologize and request your forgiveness. Person 2:  I humbly decline your request for forgiveness.
Person: I think I’m permanently stuck somewhere between “If you mess with me I’ll fight” and “If you mess with me I’ll cry.”
Person 1: It was implied! Person 2: What’s implied is your inability to accept that fact that I’m right!
Person 1: I got lazy because I was eating Pringles. Person 2: She values Pringles more than me.
Person: Yo, you be the crazy ex girls they be talking about in memes.
Person: I swear (persons name) if I hooked up with squidward in your dream your subconscious and I need to have a little talk.
Person: You get to die, and you get to die! Everybody gets to die!
Person: How do you just add a child?
Person 1: Look at this ink based pencil. Person 2: A pen?
 Person 1: This egg is all broken. Person 2: It’s like you then, you both broke under the pressure.
Lakshmi: Don’t force your opinion, voice it.
Person 1: If I where a fruit, which one would I be? Person 2: Sushi. Person 1:… Sushi isn’t a fruit.
Person: I mean it’s not straight up “Yo come here I’m gunna kill you.”
Person: Bye gays, bye (other girls name).
Person 1: No (person B) stop. Just shut up. You’re making me loose brain cells. Person 2: But… Person 1: No. Just no.
Person: Stop. That is non-consensual pizza eating.
Person 1: Cheese is not a vegetable! Person 2: Well it’s not a meat either! Person 3: Guys… It’s dairy.
Person: Idiots have priority over just regular dumb people
Person: God melted the polar ice caps just to make it rain for Noah then refroze them. I don’t know (kids name) I’m not god!
Person: You and I will go out, and leave them to their raw fish rolled in sea salad.
Person: Does anyone else get really energized when they change their room? Just me? Okay.
Person: I hope you know I will diss you guys to the end of the earth.
Person: Bruh talk to (person’s name) I don’t know sh… *notices teacher looking at her*…niahhh.
Person 1: The thing is, I don’t want to be 80 that’s rough. Person 2: Then just die at 50.
Person: You’d be scrambled eggs with hair.
Person: Seeing you two fighting, it’s like seeing a piece of light fighting a black hole.
Teacher: What can you tell me about probability? Student 1: I hate it. Student 2: Dont you mean you? Student 1: Yes both.
Person: My brain has the dumb I’m sorry
Person 1: If my first word was no, I’m assuming that’s foreshadowing for them my family disowns me after I renounce religion and systemic abuse. Person 2: Or…. You just need to make sure your last word is yes. Person 1: Yes to what though? Person 2: ‘Are you dying?’ Yes.’ Pessimism, just your style. Person 1: That’s true.
Person: My parents don’t message me, they’re the type of people who CALL. Where did I get my social anxiety from??
Person: Well guys it's been great knowing you I’m just going to drown now.
Person: I figured out a new diet regime, it’s called sleeping until noon and just not eating breakfast.
Person: The f on my birth certificate was the doctor paying their respects.
Person: Chocolates with raspberry filling are the sole reason I’m still alive.
Person 1: Isn’t Latin a dead language? Person 2: You’re a dead language!
Person: Hydrate before you diedrate.
Person 1: you have a son named Spider-Man? Person 2:  what noooo! Person 3: well don’t expose her!
Person: That awkward moment when you just really don’t care about people.
Person 1: (Person 2) and I will be over here with my virgin margarita and her water. Person 2: Hey! I want apple juice! Person 3: Why are you not drinking (Person 1)? Person 2: Because she’s to single, and also she’d strip. Person 1: Woahh! How dare you assume that I’m not drinking because I’m to single?
Person 1: Ya know, I think I’m going to have to jazz hands my way through hell. Person 2: All of us will.
Person: Brown town children, y’all find someone in India?
Person 1: Wow you have the best backup singers. Person 2: I only hire the best, at least 5 stars in yelp. Person 1: Well good because that’s  the sound they’re making.
Person: The cold kills everything, it’s like my heart.
Person 1: Remember the rolls I brought to school last year that I used to give you? The ones with paneer and the really good spices? Person 2: Yah? Person 1: This is not at all the same thing.
Person 1: What’s stevia? Person 2: It’s like sugar but no.
Person 1: Yeetus Skelettus. Person 2: Fetus Deletes? Honey, that’s called abortion.
Person: Anything for you. That’s what you said. Anything for you. But when I ask for just one bite of your pasta? No!
Person 1: I've written 1,300 words and don’t have a thesis statement or topic question Person 2: Yeah, you need to figure that out.
Person 1: you know I had a dream that you where in a romantic relationship with a toaster. Person 2:  wasn’t that your relationship with (ex’s name)? Person 1: you’d have more chemistry with a toaster.
Person: Can people read colors? Cause I am ooo.
Person: It’s like hands but medusa
Person: You look like a cardboard jellyfish that’s brown
Person 1: Two of us like boys. Person 2: We all like boys. Person 1: Two of us like ONLY boys.
Person: you’re like a reverse plant. You convert oxygen into carbon dioxide.
Person: Shhhhh. I’m not in physics, let me be dumb in peace.
Person: Why are you laying down like some greek god, get up you brown child.
Person 1: Do all of you just think you’re going to be single? Person 2: I already am why not keep the streak going to get a high score?
Person: and now cracks of light are coming out from around the sides like some sort of computer Jesus!
People 1 and 2: Rock Paper Scissors Person 3: shoot me please.
Person 1: not since 9/11 you can’t. Person 2: dang. You just tossed your whole country just to prove a point. I’ve never been so proud.
Person 1: what is an angle of depression? Person 2: it’s my life. Person 1: no it’s you because it’s not straight.
Person: Boom. Lesbians.
Person 1: Well what if two rocks just washed up at the same time and humans. Person 2: Evolution.
Person: Watermelon isn’t good anymore, I swear its just water with food coloring.
Person: You being dumb makes me want to correct you, sos too being dumb cause I’m on vocal rest.
Person: well (persons name) who have you a mouth?
Person: Teachers that grade late work deserve all the love and cookies and cake in the world.
Person 1: honestly I just want to die right now. Person 2: same. Literally same.
Person: I just feel like a single molecule lost in space.
Person: who’s gunna stop me? God? Damn him to hell.
Person: the line is not actually straight it’s like (students name)
Person 1: It’s your favorite sleep deprived gay. Person 2: But I’m my favorite sleep deprived gay. Self love. Person 1: We Stan.
Person 1: Why do you have a tool? Person 2: Because my hair is moist.
Person: eating lead was an otherworldly experience
Person 1: I have everything stolen from me 2: at least you have the tiniest bit of dignity left 3: what dignity? 1: exactly
Person 1:( holding up katsup) does this go on salad?
Person:I’m turning red! Me! A brown girl!
Person: I’m not trying argue that we should date, I’m just saying.
Person 1: what’s your biggest turn on? Person2 : a light switch Person 2: or then leaving.
Person 1: what is the most attractive retire on someone Person 2: my own face
Person: you’d be that one bar do white chocolate that just sits in the feidge because no one wants it
Person: that’s like saying I’d rather see your shirt than your face.
Person: why would I shut up when I can shut (kids name) down
Person: Subtle. Gay. Vibes. I’m telling you.
Person: just watch me write my ee on all the reasons why nick caraway is gay. Just watch me.
Person: Why are you stereotyping. What if the body doesn’t want trucks, what if he wants to be a fairy.
Person: being ace is basically just eww no but like forever.
Person: Stop trying to science your way out of being wrong.
Person: even if you did ask me out I’d still say no so then you’d even be rejected by a trash can
Person 1: you can’t read cheese color. Person 2: yellow?
Person 1: Think about  it like you’re brown Person 2: She is brown Person 1: Then act like it
Person: You’re not an ugly frog, you’re a beautiful human being. Person: I am. Very very dumb. And also. Bisexual.
Person: I was thinking of something smart but then I forgot what it was.
Person: I want to skip the crush phase and just make out with someone.
Person 1: The only way to get into the Holland family is to marry in through Paddy. Person 2: (Person 1’s name) this isn’t the royal family.
Person: Omigod you looked like the human version of squid ward.
Person: I want to be smart. Where can I learn smart stuff?
Person: But plant the seed and smoke the weed and chop the cane.
Peeeson 1: that is the definition of meter? Person 2: about 3 feet. Person 1: okay thanks America
Person 1: who’s Tom Holland? Person 2: Spider-Man you uncultured swine!!
Person: I am not a children
Person: Ohh dang yeah forgot chickens existed for a while
Person: Hey! Don’t narrate my water!
Person: I don’t read water.
Person: Think of it as a relationship. If you and your ex break up they are salty but you profit because you wanted to end it but if you end it weak, then y’all will argue back and forth and get nowhere with ending it while still exchanging insults.
Person: You know those really sexual mattress adverts?
Person: Oh please, you have the sexual appeal of an easy bake oven.
Person 1: weed is a gate way drug Person 2: YOURE A GATEWAY DRUG!
Person: (first, middle, last name), I love you to the end of the earth. But you are a daft child.
Person 1: She’s like that type of girl. She’s the long paragraph white girl. Person 2: Well that’s a niche if I’ve even seen one.
Person 1: swing you two fight is like watching two ants fight. Person 2: you friking piece of bacteria!
Person: I’m just an intellectual.
Person: I will murder your face off.
Person: that’s like a kilometer tall.
Person: It’s weird when I pet you horizontally.
Person: to be honest I thought those were rocks in a jar for the longest time. Turns out they weren’t.
Person: does she have a brother or gay tendencies
Person: I’m going to slap your hand like it’s a fricking spider.
Person: I like your face better blurry.
Person: every night at about midnight someone starts googling astrology
Person: I will kick you. I will murder your soul.
Person 1: I’m just going to marry a millionaire. Person 2: Where are you gunna finds a millionaire in this economy?
Person: Welcome to my tea party, there isn’t any tea to drink, but we have a lot of it to spill.
Person: Yah, it was something about sex or something.
Person: You’re all uncultured swines.
Person: I’m about as straight as a sine curve.
Person 1: They’re not Oreo’s you dumb head Person 2: I know that dumber head. Person 3 :Shut up dumbest heads
Person: As an ex foetus i can say with authority that if my mother had aborted me i wouldn't have known nor would i have given a fuck
Person: I’ve just accepted I’m going to fail this test. I’ve gone through the 5 stages of grief already.
Person: Yes I’m blind that’s why I need glasses fool.
Person: what the fork do you want you little son of a biscuit.
Person: Anyway now I’m taking Tylenol PM and I’m going to actually sleep tonight that’ll be fun.
Person: I need all the hoodies. ALL OF THEM.
2 notes · View notes
justtessasworld · 6 years ago
Text
connected | kai parker
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Guess who's back?? Btw I'm sorry for the format, Tumblr doesn't allow me to make paragraphs anymore?? Idk why but everytime I post it with paragraphs they're suddenly gone 🤷‍♀️
~
In which y/n sees Kai in her dreams.
~
“That was a good one!”, y/n laughed.
The young woman was sitting at the table in the kitchen of some house somewhere in Virginia. At least Kai said so.
Said man was sitting in front of her, they were playing some game but he had interrupted it by his corny jokes.
“So what are you up to today?”, y/n asked after her laughter had quieted down.
“Hm, we'll see”, Kai stated, pouring himself a glass of water. “Probably going to watch some TV, steal something from the store down the street. The usual for living alone in a world.”
Y/n sighed, grabbing his hand and squeezing it. “I wish I could be there for you. Be here.” She looked around the room, around this small piece of Kai's prison world she was in.
“Oh, don't you worry! I'm just going to wait till you go to sleep again.”
Y/n chuckled dryly, scratching her fingernail over the table.
“Yes, I know, but I just-”, she stopped abruptly.
Y/n felt the strange pull in her stomach, that weird feeling she still hasn't fully become comfortable with after all these years.
“Is it already time?”, Kai asked, standing up and swiftly walking towards the woman.
Y/n nodded, gripping his arms as her legs grew weak. “I frigging hate this feeling.”
Kai chuckled, holding her waist with one hand.
“See you tomorrow”, he said, gently caressing her cheek with his free hand.
Y/n felt her face grow hot, he was so close to her and he smelled so good and-
“See you tomorrow”, she whispered and then she was gone. Disappearing into thin air.
Y/n groaned annoyed as she stopped the ringing of her alarm. 7 am.
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Kicking away her blanket, the young woman pulled the ring on her necklace to the front.
It always fell to the back when she was sleeping.
Turning the ring around in her hand, y/n thought of Kai.
The ring had been his once. All those years ago before he was put into this prison world.
Y/n's grandma had found it in the woods in Portland, where Kai had lost it in the night of his imprisonment.
The ring was her gift from her grandmother at her 14th birthday. And also the reason for her dreams. Or whatever they were. They started a few days after her birthday and just never stopped. At first y/n was scared out of her mind of this strange young man in her dreams, living completely alone in the world and being so incredibly rude too. But after some troubles they really got to know each other and y/n Kai became friends, somehow.
She thought she was crazy when she was younger and she still did, sometimes. But she just couldn't believe that her mind could make up such a realistic person. Y/n never told anyone about her dreams though. Not her family nor her friends, she knew better than to try it, she had watched supernatural movies after all.
Letting the necklace go she stood up, making herself ready for work.
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“Elena! How are you?”, y/n exclaimed as she saw the Gilbert sitting in the Grill.
Y/n worked there in the summer to pay off her student loans, just as a few other of her friends.
“I'm fine”, Elena snapped. Wowie, y/n thought, someone was in a bad mood right now.
Elena's gaze softened and she turned to the other young woman. “I'm sorry, y/n. It's just-”
“It's just that Damon and Bonnie are still gone?”, y/n interrupted, she might not be one of Elena's best friends but they got along more than good and so y/n knew about the absence of Elena's boyfriend and her best friend. Even though y/n didn't exactly knew everything.
“Well, Damon's back”, Elena stated. “I'm actually meeting with him here, but Bonnie's still… away.”
The way Elena's said ‘away’ made y/n frown. Bonnie wasn't missing, was she? No, if she really was missing, y/n would know. All of Mystic Falls would know.
“Well I hope she comes home soon”, y/n said, smiling brightly and said goodbye.
On her way to the bar she saw Damon and waved, a small grin forming on his normally frowning face.
After a long day at the Grill and with her friends and studies, y/n was more than happy to change out of her clothes and fall on her bed. Looking at her clock, she saw that it was already 10 pm.
Snuggling into her blankets she clutched her fingers around Kai's ring and fell asleep.
There was the feeling of falling and then suddenly she stood in the same house as last night, the sunlight bathing the dark room in bronze colors.
Turning around, y/n couldn't spot Kai. Hm, normally she would just appear in the same room as him, where was he?
“Kai?”, she shouted, walking into the hall. No answer.
“Malachai? Where are you?”, still no answer.
Without a warning the front door opened, nearly knocking y/n off her feet.
“Hey!”, she cried out taken aback, stepping back a few steps.
“Y/n? What are you already doing here?”, Kai snapped, glancing behind him. What the hell?
“Wow, Kai. I'm happy to see you too”, y/n snarled, putting her hand on her hip and looking at him suspiciously.
“You can't be here right now”, Kai growled, slamming his hand against his head.
Y/n flinched, grabbing his hand and hiding them tightly.
Kai always had the habit of punching his head and everything when something was with her, as if that would make y/n disappear. Because even though they knew each other for years now, Kai still thought that she was just a hallucination, a way of making him feel better in this lonely hell.
“Hey, Kai. Kai!”, she shouted, catching his attention. “You know I hate it when you do that”, she said quietly, her eyes sad. It hurt her so much, when she saw him in pain.
“Kai? Who are you talking too?”, a feminine voice said, standing behind the door. Before y/n could react the woman walked into the hall, looking at Kai and then at her.
Y/n knew the woman. It was-
“Bonnie?”
“Y/n?!“
Gasping y/n sat up in her bed. Fuck, her head hurt. In all these years of having these dreams she never had left them this abruptly, being more like pushed out of them than slowly pulled out.
What the hell happened?
She saw Bonnie and then she suddenly woke up. Oh God, Bonnie! Her shirt had been full of blood and she'd looked like hell. And most importantly she had been in Kai's prison world. Kai had told her that he was there because of murdering his family (with which y/n was still not comfortable with), so what had Bonnie done to get imprisoned there?
Or was she accidentally there?
Glancing at her clock, y/n saw that it was only midnight yet. Not too late to hit up Elena.
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Standing in front of the massive Salvatore mansion, y/n snuggled more into her warm jacket and ringed the bell.
She had picked up Elena here a few weeks ago, the two of them wanting to go shopping with Caroline.
Now she was waiting for someone to open up, Elena or one of the Salvatores, she didn't care.
The door opened and y/n saw Damon, looking annoyed at her with an open shirt. Apparently y/n interrupted Elena's and Damon's sexy time.
Y/n smiled shyly. “I'm sorry to disturb you, but I have to talk to Elena.”
The vampire looked at her sceptically.
“It's about Bonnie.”
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“So you saw her in your dreams?”, Elena asked slowly.
Y/n nodded slightly, maybe it wasn't the best idea, now they probably did think she was mental.
“And in your dreams you are in a prison world with Kai?”
Y/n nodded again.
“How do you know that psycho-boy?”, Damon looked at her closely.
“Psycho-boy? Do you know him?”, y/n asked surprised, turning to him.
“I was in that prison world with him for months. I only escaped alone because your murder-boyfriend shot Bonnie in the stomach!”, the man spat, his face furious.
Y/n gaped at him. “No, he- he wouldn't do that”, the woman whispered, then cringing.
“Well, he did kill his family, so… “, Elena mumbled and y/n frowned. She was right, though.
“How do we get her out of there?”, Damon asked annoyed.
“Well-”, y/n interrupted Elena. “What do you mean ‘her’? We have to get both of them out of there!”
“Oh no, no, no, no, no”, Damon laughed pouring himself a glass of bourbon.
“We won't help that psycho-murderer get out of there!”
“But-”
“No!”
Y/n frowned deeply.
“Well, I don't know how to get anyone out of there”, y/n snapped, “so I'll get going.”
She stood up, taking her coat from the couch.
“You may not know a way but you can help us with the witchy-woo”, Damon said.
Y/n turned around to the two of them. “Witchy-woo?”, she asked.
“Well yeah, or whatever you witches call your magic.”
“Damon, I don't think-”
“You- you think I'm a witch?”, y/n spluttered.
Damon nodded confused. Elena rubbed her temples.
“I'm not a witch!”, y/n laughed hysterically, “We're not in some kind of fairy tale!”
“Y/n, you have to have realized that these dreams aren't normal”, Elena said in a soft voice. “They're pretty common for witches.”
“I mean, of course I know that it's not normal, but I'm not--I'm not a witch.”
Y/n shook her head vehemently. “If I'm a witch, what are you? Vampires?”
Elena and Damon went silent, looking at each other.
“Oh, you've got to be kidding me”, y/n groaned, having to sit down again. “I'm in a damn Twilight fanfiction.”
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It had been a week now since y/n found out about the supernatural world. And her probably being a witch. They couldn't confirm it yet, y/n couldn't actually use her ‘magic’ specifically but Elena and Damon and all the other vampires, y/n had met this week (well she did already know them, she just never knew that they weren't human) were sure that was a witch.
God, it felt so weird, saying that. Her, a witch.
There's also been another weird thing. In this whole week y/n had never dreamed of Kai. Not once. Sleeping, actually sleeping and not spending time with Kai, was strange for her.
It was like he didn't want her there, with him. As if he pushed her away.
Y/n awoke, in the middle of the night again, she had slept, like a normal human being but it felt wrong.
She grabbed the ring, thumbing it around.
“Kai, please, let me in”, she whispered, near tears. She couldn't sleep and not being able to dream of him, to be with him with her visions, she didn't just feel like she couldn't relax she felt like she had lost her best friend.
Crying out, y/n pulled off her necklace, throwing it into her room.
She couldn't sleep that night.
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A few weeks later, y/n was walking home from the Salvatores, having spend the whole day trying to find a way to use her powers, as she saw a man standing on her front pouch.
“Can I help you?”, she shouted, pulling her keys out of her jacket.
The man turned around and y/n let go of her keys, clanking down to the ground.
That tall frame, dark hair, these dark intense eyes. Malachai Parker.
Y/n gasped, looking at him shocked.
Kai smiled. “Hello, love.”
The young woman cried out, letting her bag fall to the ground and running towards him.
He laughed deeply as she threw her arms around of him, picking her up. Her legs wrapping around his waist.
Kai sighed, burying his face into her hair.
“Why! Why would you keep me out? I was so worried, I thought- I-”, y/n sobbed, clutching his back.
“I'm sorry, I'm sorry”, Kai mumbled, squeezing her thigh.
She looked at him, into these deep brown eyes. God, they were shining and so full of emotion. Her smooth hands stroked his jaw, up to his hair, pushing some strands back. He was so handsome and he was here.
“I can't believe you're here”, she whispered, fingernails lightly scratching his neck.
He nodded, his nose nearly touching hers.
Suddenly she was more than aware of their closeness, her legs around his middle, their faces only inches apart, his grip on her thigh.
Y/n breathed shallowly, her gaze flicking to his lips, just as his did the same.
Both of them flinched as the sound of a horn echoed from the street.
Y/n coughed slightly, awkwardly getting off of Kai.
The man grumbled something quietly.
“Let's- let's just go in”, y/n mumbled, picking up her stuff and walking to her apartment, making sure not to meet his eyes.
He was hot on her heels, following her into the small apartment y/n was able to afford.
They had spoken about that exact home once in one of her visions, Kai had never listened that closely. He was happy he did, otherwise he wouldn't have found her.
“Home sweet home”, y/n chuckled, shrugging out of her jacket.
She walked into the kitchen, drinking some water.
Kai appeared in the door frame, leaning against it.
“Love”, he started.
“How are you here? Why are you here? Why didn't I have these dreams the last weeks? You once said you're a witch? Are you a witch? Am I a witch? Elena and Damon said so but-”, y/n rambled.
Kai laughed lowly. “Breathe, y/n, breathe.”
Y/n nodded, sitting down.
“I'm going to explain everything later”, the young man said, walking to where y/n was sitting.
“But firstly I have to get some magic.” Right, y/n thought, she remembered that he was a siphoner and now being in the real world again, he could get magic again.
“Right, of course. I don't know how, though.”
Kai kneeled down in front of her, gently grabbing her wrists.
“Let me try something, that way we also find out if you really are a witch.”
Kai watched her closely. Y/n nodded, she trusted him with her life.
His grip on her wrists tightened and a hot feeling shot through them. It traveled up her arms and spread out until her whole body was hot and prickled.
“Kai”, she moaned, her body growing weak.
He stopped abruptly, letting go of her and nearly falling on the floor, his eyes dark with ecstasy.
“Y/n”, he groaned. “Well now we're sure you're a witch.”
“Why?”, she asked, slumped again the chair.
“Because I just took a bit of your magic and you have more magic than any other witch I've ever known.”
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“If you want to stay you can take the bed”, y/n said, putting their dinner in the fridge.
They had spent the entire afternoon with talking, catching up with what happened in the last weeks.
Kai nodded thankfully.
“Elena called, they found Bonnie but they don't know where you are.”
Y/n felt bad for lying to Elena but she didn't want the vampires to do anything to Kai.
"Thank you", the siphoner smiled softly. "And I can take the couch if you don't mind."
"OK", the young woman whispered, turning to her bedroom door. "Goodnight, Malachai."
"Goodnight, love."
Y/n was a light sleeper, so when she started to hear mumbling from the living room she was nearly instantly awake.
"Please- I- father, please", a voice groaned loudly. Kai.
Y/n slowly stood up. He had to have a nightmare. He told her about those years ago. Moments of his childhood when his family would punish him for, well, living.
"Kai?", she called out, standing at the door. The young man was laying on her couch, his tall frame nearly to much for the small couch. He was withering under the thin blanket, hands gripping the sheets, his face sweaty and hair clinging to his forehead.
"Let me go- I'm sorry- please don't- father, please, why-", he muttered, feet kicking away the blanket.
"Kai, hey, Kai!", y/n said loudly, sitting down next to him and touching his chest.
"Kai, wake up, Kai!", she shouted, she couldn't see him like that, it hurt.
Gasping, Kai sat up, his chest heaving and his eyes scanning the room disoriented.
"It's okay, it's okay", y/n mumbled like a mantra, hugging him close.
Kai sobbed lowly, gripping her waist and pulling her even closer.
"Oh God", he groaned quietly, his body calming down slowly.
She let him go after he calmed down mostly, still holding his hands.
"Do you wanna talk about it?", y/n asked, watching him closely.
He shook his head, not meeting her eyes.
"Where-", he cleared his throat, "Where is my ring", he was looking at her neck where his ring would normally hang since she was 14.
"Oh that. I- I'm sorry, I took it off when you didn't let me in anymore. I was so angry and worried.", y/n whispered, squeezing his hand.
"I'm sorry that I did that, I only pushed you out for a few days and after that you never appeared anymore. I was worried sick, myself. Ask Bonnie, I was really grumpy the last weeks", he muttered and y/n laughed quietly.
"It's OK", she said, "And I'm sorry for taking off the necklace."
Kai smiled, squeezing her waist.
She was sitting nearly on top of him and when she realized that, she blushed.
"Oh, shit, sorry", she whispered, making a move to stand up again.
Kai shook his head, pulling her back so that she sat in his lap.
She gasped, grabbing his shoulders. Oh God they were so close.
His arm wrapping around her waist, he pulled her even closer, their chests touching.
Y/n's eyes were wide, her cheeks rosy and her hair falling out of her braid.
Kai smiled softly, his hand touching her neck and cheek.
"God, you're so beautiful", he mumbled leaning towards her and before she knew it their lips touched.
Y/n moaned lowly, her hands gripping his shirt. Angling her head, she kissed back, slipping her tongue between his lips.
Kai's grip around her waist tightened, his hand teasing her braid.
His kiss turned more passionate, her hand clawing at his back, his neck.
"Fuck", Kai gasped as he pulled away, his eyes nearly black.
Y/n nodded shakingly, her lips swollen.
"I've waited so long for this", he chuckled, pecking her lips. Y/n grinned heartily, closing the gap again.
They were finally together.
~
Kai Parker taglist:
@kikii-stfu @panic-naran
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cortexifansquint · 5 years ago
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                        matching pairings & annotations under the cut!
                                             Youtube (x) Spotify ( x)
Buffy / Cordelia / Willow
*  Cloud 69 // Lowell
I'm like dynamite / need a cheerleader / let me throw you down / while I look at her / I'm like "Oh my god / I think I need a girlfriend"
*  Crazy // Au Revoir Simone
you knew me, wanna love to lose and to lose again / seems we're either giving up or giving in / but, uh, you girls, you drive me crazy
Willow / Tara
* There’s a Girl // The Ditty Bops
there's a girl that you might know / she's a friend at least I tell you so / but it might surprise you to find / there's something going on behind the door
* Horizon // Luna Blake 
you tower over me / you are sky and I am sea 
* Truthfully // Lisa Loeb
truthfully, I really can't explain / I'm floating, I'm smiling again 
* Room // Palehound 
she comes over / growing like a clover / in my room / in my room
* Sugar in a Pie //  Erin McKeown
love me sweet like a sugar in a pie / kiss me deep with a dreamy little sigh
Faith / Buffy
* Damn, I Wish I Was Your Lover // Sophie B. Hawkins 
that old dog has chained you up, alright / give you everything you need to live inside a twisted cage / sleep beside an empty rage / I had a dream I was your hero
* Hologram // Katie Herzig
I'm gonna let you down / gonna toss you around / gonna make you want everything you haven't found / I'm gonna hold your hand / then ask you to stand / ten feet away
* Buy her Candy
she's a famous / she's the best / I cannot lay / my heart to rest / she is selfish / she is kind / no one can say / she is mine
* Nights with you // MO
I'll take you out tonight / leave it all at home / don't care about your boyfriend waking up alone
* Portions for Foxes// Rilo Kiley
'cause you're just damage control, for a walking corpse like me, like you (S6 Fuffy edition)
* Last 2nd Chance // Vaughan Penn 
this is the last second chance I’ll ever need / this is the last time you’ll hear sorry from me
Buffy / Cordelia-
* More like you // Hazel English
I could waste all of my time / thinking up ways to catch your eye / and I tried but it just didn’t feel right / and besides I'm just trying to get by
* She // Dodie 
and I'll be okay admiring from afar / cause even when she's next to me / we could not be more far apart  (late S1 - mid S2 coffy, either pov)
* Can’t / Naaz 
in my mind / I can be what we choose / but in life / we can't stand in those shoes
* Midway // Bad Bad Hats 
the shadows you were casting nearly swallowed the night /  but god, I could have kissed you (I imagine this as the night Cordelia drops Buffy home in Helpless or sometime in mid-late S3)
* Touch //  Shura 
I wanna touch you but I'm too late / I wanna touch you but there's history / I can't believe that it's been three years / now when I see you, it's so bittersweet  (if either had showed up in L.A or Sunnydale after Buffy was resurrected)
Tara / Buffy
* If I Could // Sophie Zelmani 
If I could help you with /  this part of life you've got to live /  you could load your weight on me
* Our Eyes // Lucy Rose 
I'm alive / I feel it now / I never knew I'll find it on you / out of line we got ourselves / in a look, wait we are not fine / wait, you are not mine 
* Wire // Alessi Ark 
I'm tired of walking this wire / it keeps me awake for heaven sake / I was made for this girl / I feel lonely / my friends don't seem to know me / like i thought they did
Willow / Cordelia
* Upper West Side // King Princess
I can't stop judging every thing you do / but I can't get enough of you
* Then If I’m Weird I Want to Share // Tender Forever
people told me / that you're too sexy / you're too sexy for me / but actually I just don't care / I think it's bullshit everywhere
Buffy / Willow
* Loners // Maddie Ross
one night alone in the bookstacks / summer to make all the kids sad / next fall we're back in the corner / nice girls love kissing the loners
* Ray of Sunshine // Go Sailor 
yellow hair, fiery stare / nothing's right, 'cause she's not here tonight 
* Explosion // Zolita 
it's a mindless love affair / one hot mess of bleach blonde hair / I could kiss her but your lips taste better / you could kiss him but my words are sweeter
* Sweet Moon // Sundarta 
when the world is big and I’m alone / I call you and I am home
Faith / Tara
* Will You Be My Girlfriend // Alanis Morissette 
I guess I fall and you stay intact is that right? I guess you hear me and won't attack me, is that right? guess I reach out and you reach back, is that right?
* Not gonna Get Us // T.at.u 
soon there will be laughter and voices / beyond the clouds over the mountains / we'll run away on roads that are empty / lights from the airfield shining upon you (teenage runaway mehane)
* Love you Anyway // Jil Nisson & Marlene
I know what you've been getting / coz I sure got it too / don't, don't you forget it / the damage they do
* Walk The Line // Halsey
I keep a close watch on this heart of mine / I keep my eyes wide open all the time / I keep the ends out for the tie that binds / because you're mine, I walk the line
Willow / Amy
* Wherever We Are // Human Life
after the day we're chasing the sun / farther away the faster we run / feet on the ground our head in the stars / finding the sound wherever we are
* When We’re High // LP 
let’s swallow the moon and the stars / let’s wallow just right where we are
Amy / Faith
* Whiskey & Black Leather // Sapphic Lasers
some they want a girl next door / but that ain't what I'm looking for / I first saw your lips across the room / red like a blood moon
* Her Lover // Ally & Stevie 
she is like a cat in the dark / and then she is the darkness
* High Enough // K Flay 
don’t try to give me cold water / I don’t wanna sober up / all I see are tomorrows / oh, the stars were made for us
Cordelia / Anya
*  Only a Girl // Gia
soft touch, warm skin / nothing like my ex-man / slowly falling, I don't want my next man
* I Don’t Do Boys // Elektra 
I don't do boys, I just do girls / just do girls with style and class / I don't do boys, I just do girls / just do girls with kissable ass
Fuffy / Radison
* One More // Elliphant 
stay with me tonight / we can count the street lights / stay with me alright let's bring it all back to life (bad girls & smashed shennanigans)
Dark Willow / Anyanka + Darla / Drusilla + Lilah / Cordelia (Jasmine possessed version)
* Glory & Gore // Lorde
delicate in every way but one, / God knows we like archaic kinds of fun / chance is the only game I play with / baby, we let our battles choose us 
“ Your Lips are Red // St. Vincent
this city's red / this city's red from riding us into the ground / this city's black / this city's black from all the ashes in downtown
Willow / Anya
* Wishful Thinking // The Ditty Bops 
when the cold and lonely hours put your heart to the test / maybe I'll be the one that you like best (S7 Rosekins)
* The Happy Song // Kate Miccuci 
'cause isn't it nice to have the friends that you do? / and isn't it nice that the sky is so blue? / and isn't it nice to say "I love you"? (the cheery & matter -of-factly style of this song reminds me of anya)
Faith / Willow
* So-Called Str8 Grrrl // Gina Young
I think you want me / you know you want me / so why do you talk shit about me
* She’s so Lovely // The Butchies 
she's a rocker dressed like a killer / she's got lips like wine not sugar 
* Sum of your parts // Mary Lambert
I didn't know I was a phoenix till I learned how to speak / even with ashes in my mouth I was still born to breath / I wonder are you like me
* All I Want is To Be Your Girl // Holly Miranda
Well there's ghosts in the night and ghosts in my mind / and if we quit changing we'll be left behind / but I won't take another chance of screwing it up / so I stay where I am / but all I want is to be your girl
Buffy / Satsu
* Cliff’s Edge // Hayley Kiyoko
you turn me on / you lead me on / you got me on / a cliff's edge (satsu’s pov)
* One Night // Charlie XCX 
you are somethin’ special / twenty carats, solid gold / what we had was precious / but I had to let you go
Cordelia / Lilah
* Short Skirt, Long Jacket // Larkin Poe
I want a girl with a mind like a diamond / I want a girl who knows what's best I want a girl with shoes that cut / and eyes that burn like cigarettes
Fuffy + Willow / Kennedy
* We Might be Dead by Tomorrow // Soko
give me all your love / ‘cause for all we know / we might be dead by tomorrow
Kendra / Buffy
* Eleventeen // Kimya Dawson
you may feel strange, well, you are an angel / stuck in tight pants stuck at a high school dance / stuck doing people things not knowing you have wings
* Supergirl // Anna Naklab
you can see in her eyes / that no one is her chain / she's my girl / my supergirl
Cordelia / Faith
* Can I Say Baby // GIRLI 
can I say baby? / I don't wanna be soppy / but I like your style / think you're kinda cool / I'm sort of into you
* Rebel Girl // Bikini Kill 
rebel girl rebel girl / I think I want to take you home / I want to try on your clothes
* Flowers and Rope // Princess Nokia
voices in my head, monsters under my bed / I'm alone again, I lost all my friends / wanna play pretend? hope this never ends
Fred / Faith
* Whiskey // Nicole Reynolds
you accept that i talk too much / i accept that you talk too little / but it's fine / i like a good riddle
In the Margins // Ani Difranco
you are a rare bird / the kind i wouldn't even mind / writing in the margins of my books
Willow / Kennedy
* Pretty Girl // Hayley Kiyoko 
I can tell you’re real smart / world class piece of art / I can see you in the dark / all we have to do is start
* Let it Go // Allie Moss 
darlin' you see / the fear in me / and how I'd finally be / if I were willing to let it go
Buffy / Anne
* Annonymous Club //  Courtney Barnett 
let's start an anonymous club / I'll make us name badges with question marks
* Hideaway // IVY 
under stars and satellites / a thousand miles / from where we've been
Willow/Fred + Buffy/Tara
* I Was Made for Sunny Days // The Weepies
I was made for sunny days / and I was made for you
Faith / Kennedy
* Crimson and Clover //  Joan Jett & the Blackhearts 
ah, now I don't hardly know her / but I think I can love her
“ Honey // Kehlani
I like my girls just like I like my honey; sweet / a little selfish
Cordelia / Fred
* Genius // The Murmurs
she's kinda weird / she's kinda freaky / but I don't know / I think she's a genius
* There she goes // Sixpence None the Richer 
there she goes / there she goes again / racing through my brain / and I just can't contain / this feeling that remains
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lastthisnextyear · 5 years ago
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Play the List #00
It is the very first time I write on a blog, so pardon the awkwardness you will see throughout this post.
Hello there. I am Hana, 21 year old, and a college student who enjoying a day with no class today. Wednesday is my favorite day. I couldn’t explain it very well but since I was a kid, Wednesday was the day where everything just went leisurely, so is it today. I usually enjoy the day with music. The list of songs I have is usually made according to my own imagination. I always have this imagination where the world is playing their own soundtracks as we live.
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Not this wednesday, but I wish I were as cool as her.
But if we talk about leisure day, how do I usually spend the day? Usually I would just waste time at home. I hardly meet the sunshine, it was so bad that I might feel like I was sick because I got no sun exposure at all. Don’t do that, get some lights outside. But please stay away if you are sun-allergic or got exposed to high UV exposure. Don’t forget the sunscreen, guys.
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That’s why I would play some music to entertain me even though I am home. I usually play some sad songs because that’s how I balance my sanity but for today, I imagine a summer vacation. I want to go to the beach. It’s been months since I visited a beach. I used to play in the water during my childhood but as I grow up, I find getting your clothes wet is troublesome. It’s also annoying when you got sand in your underwear, that’s why I try to stay away from the water. 
So, the first track I would recommend is  광안리101 by  윤훼이, 짱유
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for the last weeks I’ve watched SMTM8. I don’t really find it bad, but not as excited as the season 5 or season 6. honestly, I came for the meme. But when this episode came out (episode 8), I got addicted to this track! It’s so summery, I haven’t taken a look at the lyrics but I can see it’s most likely about Gwangalli. As far as I know, it is a beach in Busan, South Korea. Now all we need is just get a car to go to the sea.
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하늘은 blue 옆엔 너 바다는 blue 뜨거워 so hot
Next, I have Blue by Dynamic Duo, Crush, Sole. What associate with ocean? It’s Blue, of course. When the sound of waves is just so calming. I remember when I couldn’t sleep, I would go through Youtube and play that Ocean waves for relaxation for whatever hours. It works actually way effectively than counting the sheeps.
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You see my thick thighs Lost it when you look into my brown eyes See‚ my little waist can make you switch sides You never know the devil in the disguise
Jorja Smith with Be Honest, she is my queen, y’all. This song is just so sexy I could dance to it while on my ride home. I usually take a motorcycle and ride it back and forth, home to campus. When you go to beach, somehow you want to look good right? haha I mean wearing that fancy swimwear, or just plain dress that accomodates air. I would go with the second option. I love it when I wear long thin dress, and get it somehow a little bit wet, it gives an aesthetic vibe.
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That's right, I'm still thinking About this dreamy day About this "once in a thousand years" kind of day About these days I'd like to make my eternity 
And last but not least,  忘れられないの by Sakanaction. I fell in love with this song quite ago, I could see that the band tried to integrate a city pop vibe into the song. I love city pop that’s why I’m immediately into the song. This is just not a summer song, I could just play it while on the lonely night drive. It’s just as lonely it is but with a hint of hope for happiness, in conclusion, be grateful for little things that happen in our life 
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Finding Goddess (Chapter 20)
Wednesday came and Carol decided she wasn't going to go to work. She had a lot on her mind and wanted to take some time off to think about what she was doing and how to prepare herself for it. She was converting to a religion she had only just learned about barely a week ago, felt she was scraping the surface of a history she never knew about before, and was going to live completely buck-ass naked for the rest of her life. She would have a lot of explaining to do. To her neighbors. To her landlord. To the people at the office. To various members of her family. To...her daughters. And truth is, she didn't have the foggiest idea where to even begin.
Would they all accept her decision and her fulltime nudist lifestyle? Would she be evicted from her apartment? Would she still have her job? Should she consider looking for a new residence and place of employment just in case? Would Mindy and Erin cope with having to see their mother naked all the time? Question after question piled up in Carol's mind, so many that they were starting to suffocate her.
Alright, let's just take it one step at a time, she thought as she stopped her pacing and sat down on the couch. Before I think about what will happen when I convert, I have to know...how do I convert to Zenrism in the first place?
It looked like now was the time for Carol to go to the Zenrists' website. So after informing the office that she was calling in sick for the day, the mother went to her bedroom and cracked open her laptop. The website was, well, generally what she expected it to be. It had a lot of nude imagery. Tons and tons and tons of pictures of girls doing stuff naked. Walking around in public, swimming in pools, drinking in bars, and even some going to class as both students and teachers. And yes, there were even images of girls engaging in more...sexual acts. Often in public. And there even appeared to be a section on the site for videos. If Carol didn't know any better, she would have thought she stumbled on another porn site, much like the one that specialized in nude-in-public erotica that she had been getting herself hot to last week.
She fought the temptation to browse the videos. Carol was here for information, not titillation, and if she started watching movies of girls walking around naked and having sex in public, she'd likely spend the rest of the day abusing her poor flower.
She did catch one interesting link leading to a questionnaire titled "Is Zenrism Right for Me?" She already knew the answer to that, but decided it wouldn't hurt just to try it out. Many of the questions it asked were expected. "I am nudist." "I am an exhibitionist." "I hate clothing." "I have vestiphobia." "I want to be naked all the time." "I want to be naked everywhere." "I don't want to do laundry ever again." Carol couldn't help but grin in amusement at how many questions pertained to one's feelings for clothing and nudity, but it seemed whoever made this quiz had considered them all.
Not everything was about nudity though. There were a lot of questions about relationships and sexuality as well. "I'm looking for love." "I'm lonely." "I want to meet more lesbians or bisexual women like me." "I just got dumped or divorced." "I want to experiment with lesbianism." "I'm looking for someone to share my specific kink with."
Then there were questions about life and spirituality. "I feel like there's something missing in my life." "I'm sad and depressed." "I'm having a crisis of faith." "My family is growing distant." "I'm having suicidal thoughts." Carol couldn't help but bite her lip nervously at some of them. Did girls really convert to Zenrism to save themselves or their families? And was the faith able to help them?
But then there other questions. Odd questions that Carol honestly had no idea how or why they applied to Zenrism. "I want to be beautiful forever." "I want to add years to my life and life to my years." "I live in a climate that's too hot." "I live in a climate that's too cold." "I'm terminally ill." "I want to be faster and stronger." "I want to save money on heat and/or air conditioning." More than one question made Carol raise an eyebrow, but she nevertheless answered them honestly. Who wouldn't want to be beautiful forever, faster, stronger, have a long life, or cut down on expenses?
After submitting her answers, the questionnaire tallied things up and returned a very high score for Carol, saying that she most definitely should convert to Zenrism right now!
"Can't say I'm surprised, but I guess that was an amusing use of my time. Hm, what's this?"
A new link appeared on the results page, saying "Take the Initiation Test." Idly, Carol clicked it and came to a new page. It was a lot less friendly, casual, and...sexy than the rest of the site. There was a distinct lack of color and naked female flesh. It was just a long stretch of cold black letters on a sterile white background, like what you would see on a final exam in high school or college.
"It really is starting to feel like I'm taking a test," she mused. "Well, might as well see what it's all about."
She filled up the top portion of the page, which asked for some of her personal details like her name and email address. Then she read the first question. "What is the First Tenet of Zenrism?"
Tenets of Zenrism? Carol didn't remember seeing anything about the Tenets of Zenrism. She must not have read that far in the Scripture. Nevertheless, the nude woman decided to at least wing it. What was the worst that could actually happen?
'The Zenrist must forever honor the Goddess and Her creation in all its perfection. Woman is the creation of the Goddess, and therefore she is perfect. Woman is made in the image of the Goddess, and therefore she is perfect. To bear the image of the Goddess is to bear that which is most beautiful, and to hide it is to spit upon all that the Goddess stands for and all that She has made. The Zenrist must never wear vestments and must bare her body forevermore, and let all who gaze upon it marvel in its perfection.'
Carol shivered as she finished typing her answer. That was...that was not how it felt to bullshit an answer to a test she had not studied for. Carol did not know the words the test was looking for, and yet the moment she started typing, they just flowed out of her like water from a faucet. And her text...it was written in that almost poetic prose that the Scripture typically used. Almost as if she was reciting it.
"N-next question," she mumbled, deciding to see what else the test wanted her to say. "What is the Second Tenet of Zenrism?"
'The Zenrist must abide to the purpose of which she was created for. Zenriah made Woman to love Her, and so it is Woman's duty to love Zenriah. Woman is made in Zenriah's image, and so it is Woman's duty to love Woman as well. To pleasure and feast on Woman's sacred flesh, to milk her yoni, to caress her buds and taste her lips and set her soul aflame is to give and receive the highest gift of all. The Zenrist must sexually gratify her self and her fellow women wherever and whenever they may be, and wherever and whenever they may hunger, and she must do so decisively and without shame.'
"I'm not even stopping to think about what I write," Carol mumbled as she finished typing her latest answer. "It's like I already know the answers. Okay, next question...what is the Third Tenet of Zenrism?"
'The Zenrist will not restrict who she will love and how many she will love. Woman was made to love the Goddess and all She created, and Woman is all the Goddess created. To not love and to not accept another Woman's love and to keep another woman for herself is to starve her self and to starve her sisters of that which they need to survive. The Zenrist must be polyamorous, ready to marry many wives and share all she has and all she is. For all women are Zenriah's, and all women are Woman's.'
One last question remained. "Why do we follow the Tenets of Zenrism?"
'To not follow the Tenets is to forget them. To forget the Tenets is to forget the Goddess. And without the Goddess, we are but cinders, doomed to fade and die, our divinity and our holy souls lost in the darkness forevermore.
'For only by abiding to our Goddess' Tenets may we connect and commune with Her. And as long as we commune with Her, we know that She is with us, and that we are with Her, even as We exist in worlds apart. The love that exists between Goddess and Woman is a love that transcends both time and space. And as long we love the Goddess, so too will the Goddess love us in turn. Always and forever.'
"Always...and forever." Carol's fingers trembled as she finished typing and her heart kicked with every syllable she put from key to screen. A warm tear rolled down her cheek. Was she crying? She was!
Carol shook her head, as though she was trying to shake the rogue thoughts out of it as though they were flies buzzing around her. It didn't work. Does the Goddess...really love me? And do I...really love Her? I don't know Her! I've never met Her! I don't even know that She exists!
She clutched a hand over her left breast and squeezed it slightly, digging her fingers into the sensitive flesh, which pulsed and shook with her still rapidly beating heart. Then why...do I still want Her?
Well, it didn't matter. She completed the test. The only thing left to do now was submit it and see where things went from there. So she did just that. A message popped up on her screen, thanking her for her time, informing her that it would be looked over by a Zenrist priestess as soon as possible, and telling her to check her email later to see what her results would be. It also recommended that she take the time to enjoy all the other features the site had to offer, linking specifically to the video section as if the page itself was giving her a wink and a nudge.
You sure are pushy for a webpage. But fine, if you really want me to watch your videos...
She nearly balked when she clicked the link. In a matter of seconds, her entire screen was filled with thumbnails, each promising to show her a sexy, high-quality adventure of naked Zenrists doing what naked Zenrists did. There had to be dozens of these videos, possibly hundreds, and they were just giving them away for free? This was like a teenage boy's dream come true! Or a horny middle-aged woman's.
But where do I start...wait, what's this video? 'Sacred Gathering at the Beach?' That looks promising.
It was. On a sandy beach, against the backdrop of crashing waves, a large group of women gathered. They were all fit, they were all gorgeous, and most of all, they were all naked. And on all of them, on various parts of their bodies, was the distinct tattoo of the Goddess' Sigil, marking them all as women of the faith. They gathered in a circle and knelt down in the sand, embracing one another, holding each other tightly. Some ran their hands down the lengths of their lovers' bodies. Some began to kiss. Some began to lay down, and others started to climb atop.
Then came the groping, the suckling, and the rubbing. And before Carol knew it, they were all having sex with one another.
So hot...so amazingly sexy.
They melted into one another, a great heaving, throbbing mass of feminine flesh that pulsed as if it were s singular living thing. Breasts jiggled, legs splayed in the air, and buttocks clenched and quivered everywhere. And all around them, people gathered. Ordinary people, clothed people. They stood a respectable distance around the naked lesbians as they rolled and rubbed and thrust and jolted against one another. Some had cameras out. Some were recording the proceedings on their phones. If the Zenrists had any problems with their intrusions, they made no sign of it. Then again, they didn't seem aware of anything. Every last girl and woman in that pile was in her own world, where only they existed. They, their sisters, their lovers, their orgasms, and their Goddess.
Carol began to stroke her groin, caressing her dampening clit.
Somewhere to the side, off-camera, a voice that sounded oddly familiar said: "What's going on here? What is this?"
Someone pushed through the crowd. A slender-looking girl in her late teens, with long black hair and a striking black bikini. She nearly fell backward when her eyes fell upon the mass of condensed sapphica.
"What the hell!"
Another girl appeared next to her, a tall blonde of similar age, with an especially gifted chest that would fill out an E-sized bra if she was wearing one. Which she wasn't, or anything else for that matter. She was naked, just like the orgy of lesbians writhing within the circle before her.
"This is a miracle," she said, looking at her raven-haired companion. "This is what we are all about, Erin."
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keithiskogained-blog · 5 years ago
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Some guys they date
Some guys they date are actually really understanding of their profession. While odds are that she has exes who weren't totally cool with it, she says she's dated men who have been "incredibly supportive and understanding" once she was honest about what was happening. "I explained, 'No one is touching me. I set my boundaries. I will never meet these people. I don't know their names, where they live, or what they look like. I do only what I want, when I want, how I want to, at the touch of my own hand. I end anything if I feel weird.'" Once they had that chat, she says it wasn't an issue, which is awesome. The first time I went ‘private’ with a guy I freaked the fuck out. All he wrote was ‘get naked’. And so far all I’d done in a chat room was flash my boobs for an influx of tokens. I froze up in stage ­fright and closed the room. In my group chat I wrote: Sorry, cam froze.” And I logged off for the night.For my first show I applied some make­up, did my hair and put on a deep v-neck leotard. It was the middle of summer and boiling hot even in just that. I sat on my bed, placed my webcam facing toward me and sat doodling in my sketchpad, waiting for patrons.I had the opportunity to watch her cam, and I realized that she has a persona when she’s camming—in the same way that a lot of media people do. It’s not like she’s drastically different, but there’s a version of herself that she shares with people while shes at work in the same way that an actress would go on a talk show and be the sweeter, funnier, more engaged version of herself. She puts on a show, and gives her best, sexiest performance, reading what the client wants, asking questions, and taking directions. All the while, she’s sort of straddling the line between sexual partner, therapist, and moral supporter. It’s a ton of emotional labor—like any type of sex work. I think we often forget that being a sex worker is essentially working in the service industry.
I have considered opening up my profile again a few times since, and very well might once I get over the ‘what will people​ think?’ ​paranoia, and memorise the retort I have planned regarding the government youth unemployment in Australia: With youth unemployment currently sitting around 13%, creating your own job using the resources you already have (in this case, internet connection, webcam, studio lighting and cute knickers) becomes a much more viable option than waiting for callbacks from the 20 resumes you sent out last week. That said, the idea of my future prospects of employability could be damaged if this was discovered, and I do wonder about the percentage of money the site makes versus the percentages the models make.I met Anna because she flatly offered to talk to me — clothed or unclothed — in exchange for money. She's Romanian, a model from a region with a reputation for sordid conditions and rapacious studio owners. If there were a dark side to the industry, she'd at least be nestled closest to it. But when her camera first flipped on for me, I didn't see the stained walls of a prostitute's den. Instead: a bright, modern apartment inhabited by a bright, modern girl. In her pink underwear. Anna embodies almost every delightful stereotype an American brain can hold over a young girl from Romania. At 24, she's clever — even cunning — sarcastically flirtatious in a way that makes you want to check your back pocket, and possesses stunning slavic beauty.She's got camming down to a science. "It's all about saying to people they are sweet," she smiles. All a man needs is attention, when he wants it, and he'll be Anna's until the tokens run dry. Regulars will sit in her room for hours, pouring money away — these are the lonely ones, Anna says. "They want to hear that they're loved... that they're sweet... that they're kind... that's how you keep them coming back." It might sound mercenary, but these guys are getting exactly what they're paying for. Only a man in the deepest bog of delusion truly believes the cam love is real — if you're spending hundreds of dollars for a companion on your computer monitor, you have to be willing to suspend disbelief. Plenty are willing — particularly Americans, who for whatever reasons (Anna chalks it up to a sort of cultural shamelessness), are more "generous" than Europeans, and more likely to buy into the act — and pay for the privilege of watching something interactive.One thing that I admittedly don’t have control over, proven by the phone conversation that spurred me to write this piece, is the judgment that others will cast on my when they know that I do for money. Even those who know that as well as dancing, I am a student and hold a day job in retail. It’s a shame that women are continuously told not to express themselves for fear of judgment and labeling. Why are we told that there are ‘good girls’ and there are whores? In my life, I want to embrace every aspect that comes with being a woman. I want to be sexy and intelligent. I want to be passionate and headstrong but I want others to know that I feel too.
"I was alone in the room, and it felt like there were hundreds of people around me. And I couldn't keep up with what they were all saying, and what they were asking of me. It was quite shocking. But then I learned to be perceptive about which member was a potential paying customer and not to waste time with all of them in the free online space."Sometimes self-­regulation regarding finances is the best option for some people: I’ve been treated better and more fairly as a Cam Girl and nude model than I was in my last retail job where I, no word of a lie, got fired for ‘looking sad’. Yet despite how much control one can have over their career as a Cam Girl there are certainly discrepancies within the industry, including safety issues and issues of future employability, as well as what is considered a fair payment and no guarantee on a basic minimum wage for hours put in. It leaves a lot up to chance."That or exotic places," says Andrea. "This is not only a sex business as some people think - models have to speak with a member as if they are in a normal, online relationship. Being able to discuss many subjects brings comfort to both parties."It's easy enough to read up on pointers from veterans. CONTINUED BELOW...
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lizzybeth1986 · 6 years ago
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Quick Thoughts on TRR Book 3, Chapter 17
• I'm basically sitting here and thinking "jeez, these guys really want us to know FOR SURE that they don't give a shit about their lone female LI, do they". Like, you gotta admire the dedication this team has to the cause. Like, the audacity of them to put out an entire extra Drake scene while not speaking a word about Hana's sexuality in canon, esp if she isn't your fiancée. That probably takes guts. Or maybe not. Maybe all it really takes is actually giving a damn (or not) about your characters.
• Title: Save the Date. Alternative Title: Proof That Team TRR Has Excellent Memory, Unless Your Name Is Hana Lee.
• The TRR team everytime they need to do their homework on Liam or Drake:
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The TRR team everytime they need to do their homework on Maxwell or Hana (but especially Hana):
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• So I assumed based on the description and the title (Save the Date), that this would include a RoE-esque selection of dress, decor, cake, all free except for a few choices. So far all we've been able to select for our wedding is food. Today we choose cake via a diamond option, our maids of honor, the kids who will carry the ring down the aisle and our officiant. And gifts for the LIs.
• Madeleine thinks Gladys has "risen" to her "level". Madeleine has a level???
• Okay so we're doing a publicity run of our wedding preps. Are we that desperate to show the rest of the country how much last-minute-wedding-planning we can cram in two hours??
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Terrence, is this your summer job?? Also, Tina, girl, I saved your ass last book after you screwed me over. The least you could do is say "thank you, O Great One and Saviour of Us All" Jeez, what do I have to do to be worshipped around here these days 🙄
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PURPLE 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍 (Sorry I love that colour it's my favouritest). But wait why am I paying for a dress if I'm going to the bridal boutique to pick out my wedding gown...right? Right?? (Orrr am I going to get a lovely fancy wedding gown for free??? 😀 Who woulda thunk!) (...oh. I have to wait till next week to see my gown. Okay. Okay. 😑)
• So we're now here in this boutique with half the court and Ana de Luca. First on our agenda: the maid of honour. If you're marrying Liam or Drake, you get to choose between Hana, Kiara, Olivia, Penelope and Maxwell. All good options xD If you're marrying Maxwell you get those four. If you're marrying Hana, you get three: Olivia, Penelope and Maxwell. Kiara isn't available because by default Hana picks her to be her MOH. Hana is clearly very, very close to Kiara and values her. Way more than the rest of us in the group seem to do, anyway.
The choices I want for Esther are Hana or Kiara. I love both. I'm so glad they included Maxwell, I like Penelope, Olivia is amazing, and all their reactions are wonderful, but these two are my favourites. (Though I'd say Esther would definitely pick Hana. She's closest to her, even calling herself "the Elizabeth to Hana's Jane").
• Once that's done, the LI gets to choose their Best Man/MOH 2. Liam chooses Drake, and he mostly behaves a little surprised and afraid that he might embarrass Liam on his wedding, which is quite the sweet sentiment and a little sad. Drake chooses Liam and from what I see, the narrative makes it a point to mention that Liam has to force his happiness because he's still not over the MC. He shows this even if the MC has not had romance points with him. Maxwell chooses Drake, specifying that even if they weren't related by marriage, he'd still consider Drake family. Drake is surprised and a little touched by the sentiment. Hana, as I mentioned before, chooses Kiara.
• Time for our ring bearers! The number of choices you have depends on whether you bought the corgi in Book 2 or not. If you do, he shows up as an extra option. The other choices are:
1. Bartie, who will be carried along the aisle via Savannah. I'm getting nightmares of the few times we took my daughter V to church and...nope. Sorry Bartie.
2. Cordonian children. Bertrand tells us that using Cordonian kids, as ring bearers and flower girls, would count as "a sign of commitment to the common people". My headcanon for Esther was that she wanted a mix of both Cordonian and New Orleans traditions (she grew up in the French Quarter), so she took every possible chance she could to highlight how Cordonian a wedding it was so the NOLA elements wouldn't completely alienate people. So she obviously chose this option.
• We now move to the last bit. If you're marrying Maxwell or Hana, Liam automatically becomes an option for the role of officiant, since it is mandatory to have a royal officiate the ceremony. If you're marrying Drake, Liam's not included because he is already Drake's best man by default. The other two options are Leo and Regina. If you choose Regina, the MC views it as fitting, given that Constantine would have been the officiant were he still alive. Regina in that sense would be a fitting stand-in. If you choose Leo, the MC maintains that he would lend "humour and levity to the ceremony" and that's something they all need at the moment.
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This man and his "my love"s slay me every time.
• BAKLAVA REFERENCE FOR LIAM. ALL THE WAY BACK FROM ROE BOOK 2.
• Esther Noelle DuPont would NEVER leave wedding gown stuff for the last minute. Nor would she wind up on the eve of her wedding not knowing who was designing her dress until the day before. She would be badgering Liam about the cake way before. She would be badgering him about the decor. She'd be badgering him about every little detail. She'd be bridezilla. No way would she be chilling the day before her wedding, ice tea in hand.
• But they did remember that Ana de Luca was originally introduced as a fashion designer from way back in MW! Madeleine also gives Ana some of Krona's finest lace, which makes me wonder if it's a tradition to have lace from Krona on a royal/aristocratic wedding gown. My theory about this gown for the next chapter is that it might be the same for everyone, but will have additional elements behind a paywall. Or will she have options between two or three gowns? Idk.
• We get to choose how we want to be announced, and then comes the diamond option - choosing our cake with the LI.
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(Screenshots - @kennaxval for Hana, and YouTube channels Vika Avey for Maxwell and HIMEME for Drake)
This is the breakdown of what this scene looks like in each playthrough:
Liam
Cake flavours: Vanilla Chantilly (white), Mocha Fudge (chocolate) and Sweetened Cordonian Ruby (pink). Liam loves the vanilla one for its subtle and complex flavours, considers the mocha one "strong, daring...somewhat sensual" and finds the pink one full of surprises (due to the Cordnian Ruby flavouring) and that "there's more to it than meets the eye". If you notice all of these are flavours Liam has an established preference for (vanilla, coffee, apples).
Decorations: The Royal design reminds Liam of his parents, so there is an element of nostalgia still there. He loves the colours of the Fairytale design, finds them "fantastically beautiful" and thinks it would be good inspiration in case they would like to expand the palace quarters.
Cake Filling: The filling options are the same across the LIs. Vanilla buttercream, rich chocolate ganache and strawberry mousse. In Liam's case, you can either feed ganache off of each other, simply try each flavour, or have him surprise you. I love my Kinky King so I knew "surprise me" would involve a blindfold somewhere 😂 (Love that option. It's quite sexy). I've also noticed that only Liam seems to have 3 options for the ganache tasting, while the rest have just two.
You also get to choose between Cordonian Ruby Pie and Baklava for a surprise dessert!
Maxwell:
Cake flavours: Coconut (white), Passionfruit (pink), and Spicy Chocolate (chocolate). He thinks of the coconut one as being "pina colada in cake form", loves the element of surprise in the passionfruit and thinks its "non traditional" flavour describes them as an aristocratic couple perfectly, and just says "wow" about the chocolate. The baker, who remembers Maxwell once trying to surprise Bertrand with cheetah cake on the latter's birthday, even sends one as a bit of an inside joke.
Cake Decorations: Maxwell jokes about the royal design being more decked out than some estates but thinks that "nothing says you're a big deal like gilded flowers, gold and jewels you can eat". He loves the castle in the Fairytale design and likes to imagine there are little cake people walking in there.
Surprise desserts for Maxwell include Cordonian Ruby Pie and Cheetah Cake.
Hana
Cake flavours: Strawberry (pink), Madagascar Vanilla (white), and Devil's Food Cake (chocolate). She thinks strawberry makes her think of it as "something...different. Adventurous". She thinks of the Devil's Food cake as "daring" and loves the vanilla because classic white cakes remind her of storybook weddings, and on cajoling from the MC to tell her honestly what flavours are her favourite Hana speaks of vanilla in a manner similar to Liam's.
Decorations: Hana is wowed by the artistry of the Royal design, confessing that she has always wanted to learn to make icing pearls as perfect as the ones on the cake. There is a tiny conversation about her baking that takes a minute, tops. The fairytale option feels whimsical and reminds her of that saying about "building castles in the clouds".
The surprise options for dessert are Cordonian Ruby Pie and Hot Chocolate.
Drake
Cake flavours: Pink Velvet (pink), Old Fashioned Chocolate Cake (chocolate) and Tahitian Vanilla Cake (white). As we all must know by now, he is okay with the flavour but finds pink "girly", doesn't have much to say about the vanilla cake and the chocolate makes him very nostalgic, because the chocolate cake was similar to the recipe his mother would use for his or Savannah's birthday cakes.
Decorations: Drake has reservations about the grandness of the Royal design but thinks it works since the occasion itself is an elaborate one. He admires the structure and craftsmanship of the Fairytale design and both him and the MC speak about the cake reminding them of the towers in Valtoria.
The surprise options for dessert are Cordonian Ruby Pie and S'mores.
• I've noticed that the story clearly references Liam's love for baklava and Maxwell's love for cheetah cakes in this chapter, but for Hana and Drake, they use desserts from their first scenes in Book 2 (where Hana prepares hot chocolate for the MC, and Drake toasts s'mores for her).
• Hmm so apparently there's some sort of surprise that all four LIs are planning for the MC. I'm guessing we'll find out next chapter.
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My favourite scene in this chapter. I loved how Kiara immediately got protective of Savannah and made it clear that she cared about making Savannah comfortable. I think it's also pretty cool that they remembered to reference the Savannah/Kiara friendship hinted at in Book 2, and it looks like Penelope was quite fond of her too.
• The MC now needs to run to a gift store, because Madeleine lets her know at the nth moment that Cordonian tradition dictates you get gifts for the bridegroom/bride and your closest attendants. Savannah offers to help, in exchange for a little advice on her love life.
• We first pick up wedding favours at a patisserie (chocolates or macarons). I had Esther pick macarons coz she has a liking for French cuisine and food, and macarons are delicate, delicious and versatile.
• We then pass by a shop called "The Gilded Apple" that sells beautiful and rare antiques. Olivia, who loves weapons and artifacts, and is hoping she will find replicas there, is understandably excited. Unfortunately, she doesn't seem to find any (unless she did off-screen and we didn't know? Poor Olivia. Why was it so hard to find Nevrakis artifacts/replicas there?)
• So even if you buy that diamond choice to help Bertrand woo Savannah at the Costume Gala, she confesses there are still barriers. Savannah fangirling over Bertrand's "stern, yet sexy eyebrows" is a Mood™.
• Savannah tells us the entire story of how she fell in love with Bertrand, pointing out that she hero-worshipped him and thought him glamorous, and was amazed that he was so protective of her. The MC has a range of joke replies to suggest to Savannah, before telling her seriously that she should confess to him what is in her heart. But my big question is: why are almost all the BertVannah scenes for free? Why couldn't you use that free scene to...idk...properly develop Hana's character maybe??
• So here are our gifts for the LIs:
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A Historical Tome for Liam. This is a hand-written history book with a blank chapter left presumably on purpose. The MC points out that he will appreciate either the rarity of the book, or the empty pages. The second option is my favourite, because the blank chapter seems to signify that Cordonia's story is "far from over" and it is "upto Liam to write this next chapter".
Maxwell will get a statue of his namesake. Savannah speculates that even though he looks like little more than an enthusiastic partygoer on the outside, both he and Bertrand can be fierce in their own ways. The MC gets to joke about what the Beaumonts might do with this statue of their ancestor, including imagining a half-drunk Maxwell using his namesake's spear to pop open champagne from a ladder.
Drake's Marshmallows Inside A Whiskey Box is quite funny and the MC gets to roast him a bit. She jokes about how it symbolizes what a softie he is on the inside even though he looks tough on the outside. It can either be spoken of as an inside joke, or as the MC showing him how well she knows him.
Hana's Telescope...well. It doesn't reflect her actual, genuine interests or personal/family history like the other three do, but instead involves some generic messages about "following your path" or "searching out your passions". Which is...eh. Tbh it sounds more like the MC is buying her a Hallmark card or something. This gift doesn't tell us much about HER, but then again when you don't develop your female LI with enough substance, that's what's bound to happen. You'll just throw over any piece of random bullshit to make do.
• I like the little story Kiara gets with her dad using that telescope, though. The one where he fooled her as a child into thinking she could see all of Europe using a telescope. I like the dynamic of that entire family. Sure they can appear businesslike to some but the love and the closeness is clearly there.
• Okay before I say anything...CONGRATS Drake stans. Nice to see so many of your MCs become Mrs Walkers now.
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(A huge thank you to VioletFlipFlops for this screenshot)
Okay so if you're a Drake stan, you get an extra scene. The MC wants to give Drake a wedding he will be happy with, and Drake would love it too, so Maxwell suggests they elope and he will be their minister/officiant (apparently he got himself ordained to officiate over a wedding between peacocks). So they go to a nearby cliff, where you can have a lovely view of the sunset. Drake brings with him a horse named Lone Star who came all the way from his mother's Texas ranch. They have their secret country wedding and the screenshots I saw look like the stuff out of every Drake stan's dreams. Story wise, this is important for Drake's arc because it shows that he has found his place and he doesn't have to completely leave behind who he is to be the man the MC wants. Both the duel and this impromptu secret wedding bring his story full-circle beautifully.
I had to leave this scene midway though. I couldn't stomach it, couldn't stand it, and for the first time in forever I left viewing a diamond scene before it got over (or before it got to sex if they weren't my LI). I felt a little sick and quite frustrated tbh. And it really isn't because of Drake. My problem here goes deeper than that.
• From the little that I saw, Maxwell was amazing as well. He set aside the bromance jokes for the day because "this isn't about me, it's about the two of you". Oh Maxwell. You really do shine when the writers allotted for you actually bother, and they didn't do you justice this book.
• It's now almost night and our LIs have returned from whatever surprise thingummy they were planning. Everyone's happy and excited and advising the MC to take rest and Mara is here to lead everyone back to the palace. And then a crowd that first looks like a bunch of excited onlookers closes in on the MC, intimidating her, and from among the lot we see...TERRANCE. WITH A GUN. AND A PAPER FULL OF INFO ON OUR WEDDING PLANNING. WTF.
• YOU SHOULD BE IN SCHOOL DOING YOUR HOMEWORK AND PLAYING CLARINET TERRENCE. YOU'RE GROUNDED.
• The tone of the chapter's end sounds like there will be some level of investigation going on but we can't entirely be sure. In any case, I don't know how they will handle both this and the rest of the wedding prep. Let's see.
General Thoughts:
• We'd better get lingerie. I've been through enough I want the kind of sex where my king rips off my clothes and breaks my bed and makes me scream and Gladys has invest in earplugs next and...yeah. I need the right lingerie for that.
• RoE Book 3 could have been better in certain respects but one of the things they did really well was to spread out the wedding preps. It's tougher to do that here, because of all the subplots, but leaving it until so close to the end wasn't exactly the best idea either.
• I'll be honest: the "girly pink cake" comment irked me but didn't entirely anger me. On one level I hate it when people say stuff like that because I'm a girl who grew up hearing those things and I'm a mum who doesn't want my children to internalize that. It may sound like a small thing, like a casual preference, but stereotyping and forcing people into boxes start out with things we believe are "small"...and whether you think he's that kind of person or not, bottomline is the writers shouldn't have had such a massively popular character say that. It could have been ten times easier to just have him say he doesn't like that colour very much or something. See? Crisis averted.
• However, I didn't have as much of a problem with this scene as I did with, say, that scene where the MC and Drake talk to Kiara in Lythikos. Frankly for me, the fact that Drake's sympathy towards Kiara was conditional and depended solely on the MC's responses was way more disturbing. In one option, it's established that Drake and Kiara both struggled mentally in the aftermath of the attack, and that he understands it's difficult for her to get out of that trauma so easily.
But then...if the MC is insensitive and trauma-minimizing, she gets to question Kiara about not being driven enough, about "what will people say if you spend a crisis hiding away in your home?", and Drake agrees. He doesn't contest what she's saying, he doesn't challenge her, he doesn't seem to even have a mind of his own in this sequence. In this option, the MC and Drake face no repercussions at all for essentially minimizing her experience and not addressing their lack of concern for her safety, after finding out about her PTSD. My expectation when I eventually chose that option was that Drake - as someone who went through something similar - would correct the MC, and Kiara would give her the tongue lashing of a lifetime. But no, in that scene Drake is interested in validating this woman's trauma only on someone else's say-so. If I - personally - were to have a problem with Drake as a character, this scene would highlight why. And even then I know the core of the problem is not Drake. Not really. It's not as much Drake as it is the fact that the writers themselves were only interested in lip-service for this scene, not genuine validation (which is why normally sensitive people like Hana and Liam don't seem to question the group's approach to Kiara much, and nor does Maxwell). The writers possibly didn't think Kiara's experience deserved the level of sympathy that was present by default in Penelope's scene at Portavira (which is why I HIGHLY regret speaking positively about the Lythikos conversation in that chapter's QT now).
• But my biggest problem is not Drake himself. The way he is written wouldn't have been a problem at all, under different circumstances. My biggest problem is the discrepancy in how the LIs are treated in the books, how some get quality content and carefully developed character arcs while others are simply given lazy writing. And right now, the differences are so obvious and so glaring they're impossible to ignore.
• Drake got a whole extra scene today. A whole extra scene, on the logic that unlike the other three, he would be way more comfortable with a private ceremony involving just him and the MC (he says as much in Lythikos, both to Kiara and to the MC). Normally, I would have probably been happy about this. It works for Drake's character and story, and brings it full-circle to that photoshoot they had in Chapter 2 on some levels. From the little I managed to read, I can tell it was written really, really well.
And that's the problem. Over here, we have the team working on AN ENTIRE EXTRA SCENE for this character, after chapters and chapters of well developed scenes that acquire depths and layers if he is marrying the MC. Drake's narrative tends to have extra layers stitched into it - the expectations of being a Duke, the reluctance to let go of who he is while embracing his role as a future noble, the insults he faces from people like Neville and how he manages to rise above them by proving himself. Hell, they even ensure that they reference his bond with Liam and how his relationship with the MC complicates things. In this chapter alone, Liam's pain is highlighted differently in Drake's playthrough compared to the others (he shows some level of heartbreak when Drake asks him to be his best man, compared to when Hana or Maxwell ask him to be their officiant). The group chats, too, highlight Liam being part of the chat in the Hana and Maxwell playthroughs, and completely absent on Drake's:
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(Screenshots from (2) @kennaxval (Hana), (3) YouTube Channels Vika Avey (Maxwell) and (4) HIMEME (Drake))
I wouldn't be surprised if they had some kind of a closure scene between Drake and Liam on this account later, while having him be absolutely okie-dokie in the Hana and Maxwell playthroughs. That's the level of attention Drake's story is being given (you can argue that Liam's relationship with Drake is different, and you'd be right, but it just goes to show how much WORK went into building this character).
And this is not restricted just to Drake. Liam has way more in terms of content as well and his scenes are of great quality. He has practically the entire book revolving around him! The book aggressively pushes him as an LI until almost the end of Book 2. The narrative has made an effort to view Liam as someone intimately involved and invested in the history of his country - it shows in most of his individual scenes, and in his cake scene and gift this chapter. Even Maxwell, who normally hasn't been given much attention this book, gets memories and some historical stuff this chapter (such as the ancestor who is his namesake and the story about the cheetah cake).
On the other hand...you have Hana. Whose canon sexuality - and her larger struggle with it - is hardly addressed in the books. Whose experience with bullying at the hands of Madeleine has been largely forgotten, even as we're constantly expected to protect Penelope from the same person. Who has gotten some of the most lackluster scenes in the series. Whose character arc got the laziest wrap-up you could imagine, who now doesn't even get original lines to describe a cake flavour she likes, or a gift that adequately reflects who she is. Whose story is given lesser focus than secondary characters like Penelope and Madeleine. PENELOPE. AND MADELEINE.
• Forget about every other chapter and take just this one as an example.
Notice how there is very little genuine personalization or memories attached either to Hana's cake scene - she simply echoes what Liam says about the flavour of vanilla when speaking about her love for classic white cake, and briefly mentions baking - or her gift which is a telescope, and which the MC attaches some generic saying/phrase to. The gift assigned for her itself is SO random, has little to no connection to Hana, and is a very odd choice for a gift. Couple that with the Hallmark-esque sayings that the MC wants to push forward, and compare it to her thought process for any one of the other LI gifts. You will see the difference.
(While you're at it, also check out this story by @i-dream-so-i-write called "The Perfect Gift". It's a rewriting of the scene for Hana's gift)
There is no throwback to, say, a time when they all had to bake pies for Queen Regina, and the latter praised Hana. Or to stories narrated to her. Or to things the MC knows she likes to do. No memories connected to Hana's grandmother, who she was obviously close to. Nothing that tells us anything new about her.
This isn't the first time this is happening. And it definitely won't be the last.
• And it's not as if they don't get any money from Hana's scenes. Even when she isn't picked as a final choice on a very large scale, she still manages to make it to the top ten in terms of diamond spending. She may not be making as much bank as Liam and Drake, but she IS clearly making bank. I'm surprised that's possible because a lot of the writing for her since Book 2 isn't worth the money people like me are constantly spending on her scenes. So I can't even buy the excuse that she's written badly because she's not popular. Clearly there are enough people invested enough in her to buy her scenes despite the lack of effort.
I wish I had more to talk about besides these complaints about how Hana is written, but I'm really not left with much of a choice. I'd like to close this QT by mentioning just one thing: the original line up of LIs given to us was Liam, Drake and Hana. One of them has the entire plot of the story revolving around him. The other has consistent and well-written character development, including an extra secret wedding scene and vast differences in his dialogue with the MC based on his relationship with her. The third LI...is given less attention and validation than at least two secondary characters in the book.
All these three were characters meant to be LIs from the very beginning. All of them made a good amount of money and had great potential for growth. So why is it that only one of the original lineup is given only scraps, while the other two get an all-you-can-eat buffet?
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nehawriter16 · 6 years ago
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2018, THE YEAR THAT BROKE ME
I’m currently sitting on the floor of my bedroom. It’s been a day of avoiding real work and responsibilities, but then again, escapism is kind of the theme of this year, so it’s only accurate that I’m here writing this.
Everybody is asleep, except me. And the men I like who live overseas, but they’ve been ignoring me, so I have no desire to ring them up despite the general despair and loneliness I feel. But let’s not begin our round up with boys, because although they rank high on my list of important life lessons/disappointments this year, I don’t want also want to give them the satisfaction of first place.
In the last 365 days, a lot about my life changed. I’m going to try to sum it up as best as I can.
1) In the beginning of December, I quit an internship that anybody else would have killed for. The work and constant travelling and being yelled at by crude seniors broke the delicate petal that I am. I’d landed that job at 19, and I loved that I was thrown into the adult world so early because it taught me a lot, but two years of showing up every day to do something I don’t love killed something inside of my brain. And so, I decided to take a month off and then move to a smaller firm, not realising that my job at EY would help to keep my sanity by keeping me occupied.
The first few weeks were bliss. After twelve hour work days, I suddenly had a lot of free time and I indulged in attending fun trainings and catching up with old friends. For a short second, life was filled with hope, up until my birthday in mid Jan.
2) Since I now had the luxury of lesser work hours, I decided to pursue one of my biggest dreams – writing a book. I already had the story in mind, and I thought that despite the emotional turmoil that revisiting some of the memories would bring, the bigger picture would be worth it. It’s almost the end of December now, and I’m still sure it is.
But the truth is – my relationship with A blossomed in 2016, and died a premature death in mid 2017. And I’ve been dragging it through the ground for longer than I should be. Sometimes I wonder if I’m solely responsible for squeezing it for the story. Or maybe it was the kind of love you can’t forget. Well, I can’t. I’m sure he has.
But one of the hardest things about writing this has been taking myself back to when we were falling for each other. I’ve been reading emails about hopes and dreams and forever after it has already ended. And how do you write about happiness when you know there isn’t going to be any? All this is important for the narrative, yes, but it fucks with my mental health so badly. 2016 me was naive and trusting. 2018 me is bitter, and not too thrilled about revisiting those moments mostly because of how much they hurt just to think about, forget turning them into an interesting cliff hanger filled story.    
I have almost finished writing it though, and that’s what’s the more important thing. I don’t know what kind of nightmares publishing and finding an agent and royalties is going to bring, but at least I will have created something tangible and coherent instead of this faraway thing that I’ve dreamt of since I was 13.
3) I tanked my CA Final – and this was the biggest disappointment, no surprises there. More than the gallons of self loathing it brought on me, it was about the burden I created for my parents. Yesterday my mother, in a burst of anger, said, “If you don’t pass in May, you can’t live under our roof anymore.” She doesn’t know this, and she probably never will, but I cried myself to sleep because that thought terrifies me.
I feel like I am already just swimming through a rubble of guilt. Most people my age have already gotten well paying jobs and have been living out of home for years now. They are financing themselves and starting businesses and I don’t even read the newspaper on a daily basis. I lack the self control I used to have in school, or maybe my mother’s constant nagging and being up my ass was the only way I stayed successful when I was younger.
Of course, this career choice was a MASSIVE bad decision, and I’ve always felt out of place in it. I will never be the best, but I really do need to pass and finish. If I can’t pass it again, I will literally sink into unconquerable depression that no amount of therapy and medicines will be able to pull me out of.
I’m supposed to start studying from the 1st, and I hope that it doesn’t drive me FUCKING INSANE like the last time it did, because this time, the pressure is higher and time, lesser.
I still have some grit left in me though. The last two months of this year have been difficult, but creatively fulfilling, and I am okay with having to go back to analytical subjects again. I feel sane enough to drop into the mental battlefield that is the CA Final syllabus.  
 4) I’m 23 in a fortnight, and at least 5 of my friends got engaged this year. I was the oldest in school in my batch so they’re all younger than me. This whole finding a boy thing is stressing me the fuck out, because as per my calculations, it would take a year of courting for me to so much as like somebody seriously. After that, it would take two years for me to try every possible method to drive him away, and torture him with all my hamartias, and THEN if he doesn’t leave, and when he proposes, I’ll be like, “Okay fine. Maybe we can be engaged.” This whole process takes 3 years. I want to be married at 26, so I only have those many. The problem is that in this time period, it will not only be difficult to find an emotionally available boy with a pretty face – WAIT, for him to find me, because women don’t do the chasing – who is also sexy and charming and reads poetry and has a sensible head on his shoulders. No, in this time period I will also be taking solely career-oriented decisions as one must, and love will always take the backseat. I want to move abroad in 2020 and he may live somewhere else, and it’s clear from my several failed attempts that I can’t do long distance. Also to be noted that you cannot try this experiment with different men simultaneously. It’s sort of a one lab rat at a time type of test.
So what, then? Fuck feelings, and only be serious with hook ups? I think I’ve filled my 2018 with at least a two dozen of those hot but dumb types (tall, abs, rolling in money, half a brain, bonus if they’re good kissers, but you can never date them seriously) and to be honest I’m getting tired of them. First of all, they’re all pussies about the poetry, it literally frightens them which I find kind of hilarious, but it’s also annoying. Sure, we can roll a joint and make out on my terrace, and they’ll just pull up when I find myself getting even the least bit lonely, but the ones I really like – the fuckboys who I see have real turning into boyfriend potential – they live abroad. It’s so cliché, I might vomit, but they literally live in London and New York. London Boy is only here for a month and then he’s gone. New York one may stay back, but he always wants to meet after midnight and there’s no fucking way my parents are allowing that.
And let’s face it, I’m a relationship girl. Sure, I’ve picked up some skills with hooking up and if we’re being honest I don’t really have to make an effort, just pick a half-interesting loser from the hundred DM’s sitting in my Instagram, and it’s done. He does the work and buys the drinks. I put out. I ghost. It’s practically a system.
But I’m bored now. I need somebody entertaining. But no matter what, one of the most important lessons I’ve learnt this year is to never settle for less than what I deserve. (At least for my heart. My body gets it when she likes it, and thats enough.) So I say no to…well, everybody. True love has literally been evading me, and may for a while, I think until this CA shit is done, because it’s more important anyway.
Until then, I literally have a broadcast list called, “FWB.”
4) Do I even need to write about fake friends? Girls are so fucking FAKE NICE, it irritates me. And I have a great group of these girls in my life, who want nothing more than to use you as a stool to get to where they want. I have very few real friends and I’m so grateful for them (okay, her) because everybody else is just about the temporary bullshit. I am always afraid of judgement with them, and everything I say comes with a “what will they think of me?” filter. I don’t think real friendships should be like that at all. No, in a true friendship, you should be able to take both – your make up and fake bitch mask off and sit around in sweats, drinking and complaining about everything that’s wrong with your life.
Is this really how adults act? Will I always have to worry about the ulterior motives of everybody new I meet? And even scarier, if I spend enough time around them, will I also turn into a self centered asshole with no backbone? Will I forget who I am and start adapting to the social settings into which I’ve been thrust?
Because I hope not. Despite everything that’s happened this year, and despite almost losing my mind to mental health (yes! A thing I am still not ready to talk about! But someday will be!) I actually like my brain and what its capable of, once it starts trying. I like the stuff I come up with, the way my thoughts come out as sentences. I am actually a fan of the voice in my head, who – let’s face it – has been a real ass friend to me also. Even though she kind of went crazy with the depression, but I think the recovery has begun.
2018 was a fucking shithole, and god, I fell deep. I know 2019 is going to be even harder but I hope it is filled with more genuine happiness because it’s been a long time since I felt “happiness” as a permanent, internal feeling. It’s just been more of a fleeting and momentary thing for a few hours before the sadness envelopes me and takes lead.
So I hope that when I speak to you in – and over – the next 365 day period that’s about to begin, I am able to share some more hope and joy with you. I hope the motherfucker I’m going to marry stops sitting around on his ass and finds me, because I’m ready for my heart to be won over again. I have mourned enough, and fucked half the high spirits crowd. But most of all… I hope this book I’ve written does well. Not just because it’s a brilliant piece of shit, and a beautiful fucking story (if I may say so myself) but mostly because I really like clothes and I could use the money.
Also it would be great to stop feeling so mediocre all the time, so yeah. That would be nice. Will keep you updated Tumblr!
Love,
NC
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anon-luv · 7 years ago
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Blankets 5FINALE5 [JungkookXReader]
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Pairing: Jungkook x Reader (Feat. Rest of BTS)
Genre: Romance/Angst/Smut BadBoyAU!
Summary: A one night stand turned into various visits. No strings attached, or at least that is what you told yourself every time he walked through the door. His first name was the only thing you knew, besides having memorized every sensitive spot that laid upon his skin.
One night you catch a glimpse of his world. One that you had never had the temptation to roam on your free will. Jungkook though was addicting, and your craving for his touches led you to venture into his life. This new found world offering you a freedom you didn’t know existed. The consequences of your actions instead of taking you a step closer to him, formed a barrier. Jungkook’s sweet touches turned rough with rage, his passionate kisses turned possessive, and his comfortable casual talk went to promises/lies of a forever.
Rating: M [Language, Strong Scenes, Drug usage, Sexual Scenes]
Author’s Note: Took me forever.... I AM SO SORRY!!
I lost the original ending because my computer went to laptop heaven so I had to rewrite it. Here you go though. I hope you all like it. I am so nervous about posting this since it was the first fic I have ever written..and to be honest I did not expect anyone to like it lol. Thank you all for your support.
This is the finale, but I do plan to do a small epilogue drabble for this. 
Also I will edit it a bit more later...ignore minor grammar mistakes please
DISCLAIMER I DONT OWN THE LYRICS!!! Credit to people who wrote it. 
Let Go by Hailey....Steinfield? hehehehehe
Love yall!!
Trigger warning: Drugs, alcohol, and Sexual scenes
Not 100% edited yet. Might have minor mistakes :)
Feedback is greatly appreciated! It makes me Happy!
Word Count: 6.2k+
Blankets
.Part 1. .Part 2. Part 3. Part 4.  [Fic Playlist]
MASTERLIST
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“I can’t sleep right now, so instead I’ll lie here and imagine better days. Days where I’ll wake up to your arms around me and not your name on my phone. Days where I’ll fall back asleep to the sound of your heartbeat and not the lonely silence of this room. Days where we’ll be together and nothing else will really matter anymore. But should I manage to slip off into a new night of dreams, I hope you know you were the last thing on my mind. You always are.”
 Whoever said Love is a blessing was lying…...Love is a curse. Love is a parasite consuming you from the inside slowly and painfully with no remorse. Love is to lose oneself in a feeling without a guarantee of finding love on the other side. Love is pain. Love is a weakness. Love is succumbing yourself body and soul to another person and giving them the ability to walk away at any given time, leaving you with nothing left. Love…...you were completely in Love with him, and you were starting to despise the ill feeling that had taken over your life.
Your sleeping schedule had adjusted to his, in order to have as much time with him as possible. He had become an addiction, an endless craving.
The way Jungkook kissed you had changed along with your relationship. The kisses seemed to last longer, but they also tended to be a lot rougher. He was not as fond of you spending time with Yoongi or any of the guys on your own. He always managed to keep a hand on you when they were present as if he was marking his territory. You had never witnessed such a possessive trait on Jungkook when he was with Tabi. You knew that what you and Jungkook had was a lot more different and complicated than what theirs had been, but you were slightly taken aback on how needy he had become. You didn’t mind it at all for you were just as needy yourself. Jungkook and you spend most of your time locked inside your apartment talking about everything and anything. The blanket had become your haven, and parting with them was becoming almost physically painful.
Winter had come and gone, and the melting snow had marked your anniversary with Jungkook. The day was colder than usual, and Jungkook had finally managed to keep a stable job for longer than a month. Yoongi had managed to wiggle Jungkook into a paid internship in the music studio. Jungkook had taken advantage of the position and started using the studios to create his own music. His singing had become his number one priority besides you. The hang out spot usually lacked your presence, for most of the time that you weren’t with Jungkook you stayed in your apartment waiting for him to come back. The boys stopped at times to say hello or have dinner with you guys, but you rarely hit the circle to fill up your lungs with smoke now at days.
“I miss you,” Yoongi said through the phone “I see you more at the studio these days than anywhere else. The garage is lonely without your presence. Danielle and Namjoon have been glued at the hip by the way. What’s up with that?”
“He must be doing her good,” you said bursting out into giggles.
You heard a yuck from the other side of the line “Too much info (y/n), I much rather not know which places have been rubbing against each other behind closed doors. Which by the way...are you and Jungkook going to get over this whole humping like bunnies stage...it is growing old”
“Yoongi, we don’t hump all the time… we talk in between breaks” you said teasingly.
“Ok that is it, I am hanging up now,” Yoongi said as your giggle turned uncontrollable.
“See you in a bit Yoongi. I am on my way to the studio” you said as the cold wind blew against your face once again.
“Whatever” you heard him say as his other side went dead.
The chilly winter air was canceled out by the warmth of the building that you had just entered. The area was quite roomy, white, and clean. It looked modern and you felt a bit out of place.
As soon as you entered the premises you quickly scanned for Jungkook in the desk he usually sat at. His lack of presence gave you a weird chill down your spine, sort of like an intuition of something that was about to flip your world upside down. Before you could overthink the feeling Yoongi came out of a door and walked over to you, “Hey, Jungkook is in the back recording some stuff, he asked me to tell you to pop a squat. He shouldn’t be more than 10 minutes”
You nodded and took a seat in one of the white stiff couches in the waiting area, Yoongi smiled at you and turned back to the door he had just come out from. He looked a bit hurried as he basically ran back inside what you assumed was a studio.
It had been an hour. Your phone was at 15% and your foot had tapped annoyingly on the floor for the last 30 minutes or so. Finally, Jungkook stepped out of the room looking quite happy, completely ignoring the fact that he had made you wait for so long. He jumped into the couch next to you making your anger and frustration melt away as his lips captured yours in a surprise lock, something that was not appropriate for the public, but as your hands made their way to his soft locks the rest of the world disappeared.
“Gross” you heard a deep voice say breaking you apart.
“Your ass” Jungkook replied to Yoongi playfully as he managed to pick you up and sit you down on his lap “You are just jealous I own this sexy pair of lips ….and I am not talking just about the ones on her face.
“YAH! Jungkook respect your elders” Yoongi replied, but you could see a flash of a strange emotion in his eyes.
You smacked Jungkook on the chest “Stop it Kook! Or I will ground you”
“Oh, please do,” Jungkook said sexily in your ear.
“Ok time to go home,” you said pulling Jungkook up.
“Oh, please do,” Yoongi said mocking Jungkook’s previous statement.
You walked towards the pale man and pecked his cheek “Stop it Grumpy ass”
Yoongi rolled his eyes clearly blushing. Jungkook gave Yoongi a stare, but he just shrugged off the younger boy as he waved you goodbye.
Before you made it out the door you heard Yoongi yell Jungkook’s name followed by a “Don’t worry about a thing Kookie, we will spread that shit all over the stations”
Jungkook’s previous possessive stare turned to one of excitement as his bunny smile spread taking over his whole face.
Before you could ask what that was about Jungkook was already pulling you away towards the apartment, barely giving you time to breathe as he decided to toss you over his shoulder to get there faster. You laughed the whole way back, not knowing what was about to hit you head on and in all honesty as Jungkook ran back to your apartment while whispering naughty things in your ears, you did not give a single fuck.
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  Change. It was bound to come. It always came when you least expected it. It started that fateful night when Jungkook’s possessiveness took an all-time high. All it took was Yoongi’s hand on your lap for Jungkook to snap. Punches, kicks, pushes, split lips, and a bruised eye later you had grown tired of it. When had your relationship turned into this?? The freedom you had felt whenever Jungkook was present had been thrown out the window. As soon as Jimin and Hoseok split the boys up you pulled Jungkook away as if the place was on fire. You needed an explanation of whatever the fuck was going on.
“Okay Jungkook, are you a puppy I need to get fixed or something? what the fuck is wrong with you??” you asked as you gently placed ice on his swollen lip.
“The real question is what the fuck is wrong with you?? Are you some sort of hot potato that my friends can pass around and run their hands all over??? Are you a hoe now?? Is that your goal? am I not good enough??” Jungkook scram in your face as his face grew a gross shade of red.
For the first time throughout your relationship with Jungkook, you were rendered speechless.
The tears threatening to fall not from sadness, but from complete and utmost anger. Who did he think he was? He had turned your life upside down and he thought he had the right to judge you?
“Jungkook, Yoongi and I are friends, you know that we have been close for a while as FRIENDS.” you replied not knowing what to say exactly to please the man-boy. Your mind running about 100 miles per hour. You just wanted to fast forward ahead and get this night over with.
“Yeah friends, sure whatever you say (y/n)” he said grabbing his beanie and stomping away towards the door, the ice on the table melting….forgotten. He turned to look at you one more time and you could see him fighting a battle inside his dark brown orbs. He walked back towards you and captured your lips in a rough yet breathtaking kiss.
Your hands consumed themselves in his broad back pulling him in even closer. You craved his warmth more than anything in the world. He was your safety net, he was your comfort blanket.
Jungkook bit your lower lip causing you to moan into the kiss intensifying it. He walked you backward into your open bedroom door. He laid you down softly on the bed, and he paused looking down at you. His eyes traveling across your face like he wanted to map out every single freckle as if they were stars in the sky and he was about to become a blind man. You scrunched up your nose getting a bit self-conscious. A gentle smile appeared on his face contrasting the previous argument that was no longer existent in your mind.
You whispered, “I love you”
He bends down to capture your lips “I love you too”
His hands peeled your clothes slowly gracing your skin ever so softly. Feathery like kisses sprinkled across your neck traveling down, marking a path to what you knew was going to shoot you up to the stars.
As he lifted your hips to strip off your last piece of clothing you noted a lone tear escaping his eyes, but before you could ask what was wrong, he thrusted deep into you making you swallow down your questions and insecurities.
The blanket now cocooning your bodies as you moved in sync with each other, a sweaty beautiful mess.
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You knew something was off when your eyes opened to an empty bed, empty kitchen, and half of an empty closet. Jungkook was nowhere to be found and neither was his clothes. Even the old worn out ones you had treasured from before you both became an item were missing.
Your hands trembled with anxiety as you reached towards your phone. 25 missed called, none from Jungkook. You ignored the notifications and dialed the number you now had as memorized as your own name.
Disconnected. The line had been disconnected. The beep on the other line ringing endlessly, but you didn’t give up. After 50 calls, your neurons decided to assist you, and you dialed Yoongi. After 3 rings he answered sounding worried.
“Hey, how are you doing?? I heard” he asked in a quiet serious tone.
“What happened Yoongi?? Tell me what the fuck is going on??” you asked breaking down in nervous tears.
Yoongi sighed into the phone “I’ll be right there”
“No don’t. Meet me at the studio” you said in a rush and hung up the phone.
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  You slammed the door to your car as you turned it on and rushed out of the parking space. Much to your luck, you had gotten stuck at 5 pm traffic. Your anxiety causing you to hyperventilate. You raised the volume of your radio and the ac in your car. Your finger tapping a rhythm against the steering wheel.
You looked anxiously at your watch. It had already been 10 minutes in traffic and the line was still not moving. You regret your decision to take your car.
The radio suddenly caught your interest “And now a brand new song featuring one of our hometown artists who has taken off to the big city with a shiny new contract. We wish you the best of luck!”
Your heart accelerated, Yoongi’s voice telling Jungkook something about a radio station coming into mind, but this couldn’t be Jungkook.
 “You made plans and I, I made problems
We were sleeping back to back
We know this thing wasn't built to last and
Good on paper, picture perfect
Chased the high too far, too fast
Picket white fence, but we paint it black
Ooh, and I wished you had hurt me harder than I hurt you
Ooh, and I wish you wouldn't wait for me but you always do
I've been hoping somebody loves you in the ways I couldn't
Somebody's taking care of all of the mess I've made
Someone you don't have to change
I've been hoping
Someone will love you, let me go” Jungkook’s soft voice blasted through the speakers.
 Your silent tears had become hysterical. The lyrics to the song hitting you like an 18-wheeler ramming head into your small beat up beetle. The song you were assuming had been written about Tabi.
 Arriving at the studio had felt like ages, and when you saw Yoongi waiting for you outside walking aimlessly from side to side as if he was as lost as you, you broke apart in his arms.
He caressed your hair “I promise I had no clue. He said he had told you. He said you were going with him. I even helped him pick out an apartment in the city. He was excited about moving WITH YOU to a new city”
You looked into his sad familiar eyes “Yoongi, how long?”
“What?” he asked confused.
“How long has he known about this? About the city? About the contract?” you asked desperately for answers you knew were just going to hurt you more.
“About 10 months ago, he got scouted by one of our talent agents, and he got asked to write a song and send in a demo. About 3 months ago he started writing a song…….and we finished it 2 weeks ago” he said summarizing the betrayal that had been Jungkook.
Jungkook had never really believed in a future with you. 10 months ago you were celebrating your 2nd month anniversary playing video games with endless pizza and chips, and now as you stared at your broken reflection against Yoongi’s glasses, you came to the realization the song might have been about you.
 Yoongi went back to your apartment and made you a burned toast for dinner. He tried cracking jokes, failing miserably at making you smile. You kicked him out nicely at 12am, as your feet dragged you lifelessly to your once shared bedroom. His belongings completely gone, but the memories more present than ever. You made your way into your bed wrapping the blankets around you from head to toe. His scent strong against your nose. You buried your face in his pillow and screamed as loud as you could. You scram and cried till your eyes gave up, and your heart and brain surrendered into a sleeping coma to let your body rest from all the pain.
  The next morning you were mad. Scratch that; you were furious. The sadness from the previous day had gone down the drain replaced by outrageous rage. The alarm clock turned on the radio station as if on cue playing Jungkook’s now HIT SONG according to the DJ.
You heard knocking on the door and you stomped your way to open it. The anger glowing in your eyes made Yoongi want to hide behind the brown bag full of donuts he had brought to cheer you up.
The tears in your eyes erupting from a dormant volcano as soon as you saw Yoongi at your doorstep, looking fully awake and quite scared instead of his sleepy grumpy self.
You decided at that very moment that you hated change. You hated the red hair that now lay upon your head, you hated the piercing on your tongue, you hated the way Jungkook’s number was no longer a mystery but carved in your memory, you hated how empty your apartment was, but most of all you hated the emptiness in your heart you could’ve avoided by not letting Jungkook in after that first one night stand.
Yoongi walked into your apartment after building courage setting the bag on the table and starting a pot of coffee. Caffeine had always been the best remedy for his everyday problems, and right now it seemed like you needed a bit of a boost.
You frowned at the dark cup of coffee in front of you as you bit at a donut as if it was Jungkook’s head. Yoongi frowned not used to seeing you in such a horrible state.
“Do I look like garbage Yoongi??” you asked the boy sitting across from you.
He set his coffee mug down and looked deep into your eyes.
“No (y/n), you are seriously one of the most beautiful treasures I have been granted in my life, and you are the closest to a best friend that I will ever have. You did not deserve any of this shit, the problem wasn’t you” he said holding your trembling hand in his large calloused one “I am sorry (y/n) I should’ve tried to keep you away, I didn’t think stuff would end up like this. But just a tip…. sometimes showers are good for the soul…..and other things”
“Yoongi you warned me, you warned me several times and it fell on deaf ears. It is not your fault...it is all mine. I fucked up...just like I always do “ you said with a bitter laugh “Karma is a bitch after all”
Yoongi looked at you with saddened eyes, “(Y/n), whatever you are thinking don’t please. I know you must be thinking the worst right now but give life a chance. Sometimes shit happens, but it happens for a reason. You were too good for Kook anyway. You think you are a fuck up?? Then he was times ten.”
You smiled sadly at Yoongi “You think so?”
He stood up and wrapped his arms around you. His warmth reminding you of Jungkook, but you couldn’t help but notice how much bulkier Jungkook’s arms were. Yoongi kissed your cheek shyly “I know so”
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A week. It had been a week and no word from your Houdini.
The sheets now lay cold in your bed, the essence of him still lingered for you have not been able to sleep in the bed you had once shared with the person you thought would be the love of your life. You walked aimlessly around your apartment seeking proof that he had existed, the pictures framed on your wall not good enough to satisfy your need for him.
Why would he leave so unexpectedly right after making love?
You sighed completely annoyed at yourself?
You were being weak while he was in his prime, being showered with all kinds of rewards. You looked back at the blankets, your dry tears in your cheeks feeling sticky against your hand.
If he was done with you, you were done with him.
You had already wasted too much time chasing after a person you weren't even sure wanted to be chased in the first place. You were better than this.
Determined and numb to any Jungkook related emotions you marched towards the bed ripping away the sheets in which he used to lay and walked straight out of the apartment.
Half the blanket dragging behind you like a tail, you walked away throwing them out of your life along with your memories of Jungkook.
There on the floor beneath the bed though, a letter that had been wrapped around the blankets went unnoticed, your name scribbled on the front along with a crooked heart.
 ----
“I really do not think you should be doing this” Yoongi said trying to take away the lighter that you grasped tightly in your fist. Yoongi was on his way to your flat when he noticed your figure walking around with your bedsheets. His curiosity allowing you to proceed in your strange endeavors, but as soon as your lighter made an appearance it was game over. The blanket had been placed in your apartment complex’s trash, but even then, the mere thought of the blankets existing irked you. Fire was the only answer to your current predicament, and you did not even care about any future consequences.
You lit the corner of the blanket, and before you knew it, a blaze had ignited setting the rest of the trash surrounding them in different shades of orange.
“Holy Shit” Yoongi whispered as the fumes started to make him cough.
The fire growing faster than you would have imagined causing your neurons to properly function again, you looked at Yoongi completely panicking “What the fuck do you think you are doing?? Call the fire department. I fucked up! “
Yoongi nodded quickly taking out his phone
Not even a minute later the sirens blasted through your neighborhood ready to put out the fire in the trash can. You wondered if you stood right in front of the pressured water hose, would it put out the fire that was burning from within your heart as well??
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 Bullshit.
This was utter bullshit.
“One thousand seven hundred dollars!!! What the fuck? All I did was burn some blankets outside” you scram looking at the court fee you had just received in the mail.
 “Well, you did almost light up your apartment building??” Danielle said shaking her head as she sat down in what now was her usual seat aka Namjoon’s lap.
 You rolled your eyes at her, ready to argue your case, but before you could Danielle stood up pulling Namjoon along with her. Her slim figure not giving away the Hulk she has hidden within. Namjoon smiled at her like a love-sick puppy. You gagged playfully as she walked next to you ready to head out the door.
She looked at you suggestively as she gave you a wink “Anyway, we better head out. The rest of the kiddos are waiting for us in the Garage. See you there LATER” she said enunciating the last sentence, not really giving you a choice of whether you would make an appearance or not.
 “You too Yoongi, behave,” she told him as she bit her lip suggestively. The color of your cheeks brightening as you tried hiding the fact that you had noticed her not so subtle hint at Yoongi.
 Yoongi and you had grown closer with the passing months, other than school and work you had spent every waking moment together. The line between friendship and romance growing thinner and thinner by the minute, but when Yoongi tried to jump over the boundary, there was always something holding you back. Jungkook.
Even though he was long gone, you couldn’t shake him off. He was everywhere you looked. He was in the raindrops that kissed your skin in the evenings when memories of him twirling you around as he hummed a song to end it with a slow passionate kiss came to mind. He was in the late mornings when you would wake up at 11, and you would have a tough time deciding whether you wanted a late breakfast or early lunch, when back, when he was around Jungkook, would flip a coin, before you would instead end up having to eat dinner. Jungkook was behind every Superhero movie or comic book, the lines of some memorized due to the endless replays, courtesy of Jungkook. He had become a permanent mark. A tattoo that you thought would wash off with water and soap, but instead, it had turned into a lifetime commitment. Something you sometimes completely despised and regretted while at times you treasured it like it was the most beautiful piece of art.
There were days where you laid in bed, replaying your last day with him over and over again, wondering where you went wrong. Your head commanding your heart to move on, but your heart played deaf not following orders.
Yoongi had been your aloe vera. He had been there for you on your down days when the urge to google Jungkook’s name had become so tempting, you had turned your computer off and on over 100 times. He had studied with you a few hours before your class when you had forgotten to study because Jungkook thoughts had clouded all of your reasoning the night before. He had stood with you in court sharing your punishment over a stupid immature decision because of those stupid blankets. Yoongi had been there, all along from the beginning he had never gone away. Why did your heart keep pining for someone who was no longer there? It was just like chasing a ghost…..
 Yoongi’s head rested on your lap while he scrolled through his phone. His eyes moving slowly from side to side as he read an article that was obviously interesting to him. His facial expressions had become easier to read now, and you could tell he was deeply intrigued. You were but a pillow to him at the moment, so you decided to take the opportunity to admire the man who has stood beside you. His long fingers moving fluidly with ease, you could tell easily he played an instrument. His pouty lips hiding one of the cutest rarest of smiles you had ever seen. His nose a little button that sometimes scrunched up reminding you of a little kid. He was cute. He was handsome. Why couldn’t the butterflies in your belly flutter around for him?
 “You look a little troubled” Yoongi’s deep voice snapped you out of your thoughts. You looked up to stare into his brown eyes that were now leveled with yours.
“I am not...not at all I just…”
“Did you forget I can read you like the back of my hand?” he said pinching your cheek playfully as if you were a little girl.
You gave him a smile, that unwillingly turned into a pout, “I just don’t get it”
“Don’t get what??” he asked tilting his head to the side.
 You stood up from the couch and walked towards the window not daring to make eye contact with him, “Why it still hurts…. Why I can’t move on. Why are there days where I feel perfectly fine like he never existed only to wake up the next feeling like I can’t stand up because I am missing a part of me? I want to know why I did this to myself. I want to know why my brain is telling me to move on, but my heart is not having it. I want to confess that when I look at you I want to love you, but for some reason, something is holding me back….he is holding me back Yoongi, and I don’t know if he will ever let me go”
 Yoongi looked down at his hands, his phone forgotten beside him. He looked up at your now hunched figure across from him. Tears flowing down, something that hasn’t happened in a while, at least not in front of him. Yoongi stands up following your footsteps as he crouches down to level your face with his. His hand caressing the side of your face, wiping a few tears before he tilts your head up to look at him. Your eyes shyly meeting his. His breath hitting lightly on your lips as a scent of mint takes over your senses completely hypnotizing you.
Before you knew it, his hand had fallen away from your face, his wide eyes now focused on the direction of the front door.
“Kook?” he whispered in shock.
Your breathing hitched paralyzing you in place, barely gaining enough momentum to face towards the direction Yoongi was staring at.
Jungkook stood there in one of his usual white shirts, his face completely pale as he took in the sight before him.
He looked from Yoongi’s eyes to yours, a look of absolute betrayal taking over his previous shaken expression.
“THE FUCK IS GOING ON HERE!?” he scram walking forward completely furious at the man in front of you.
Before Yoongi could react, Jungkook was already holding him by the collar, pulling his fist back to aim a hard blow right upon his face.
You stood up quickly due to the adrenaline rushing through your veins. The confusion in your brain muted, to try and pacify the upcoming fight.
“Jungkook, put him down, nothing was going on,” you said trying to pry his hands off the man’s shirt.
“What are you saying (y/n), I can’t hear you with all that shit pouring out of your mouth,” Jungkook said completely furious.
His eyes practically glowing red with anger.
“Jungkook seriously let him go, we were just talking,” you said as you soothingly touched his neck, “Please babe”
Jungkook took a deep breath as he set Yoongi back down on his feet.
Yoongi looked confused at the younger boy standing in front of him “What the fuck bro! Where did you go? Why didn’t you call or anything?? We were all worried”
“You didn’t seem that worried a minute ago” Jungkook replied looking directly at you accusingly.
“Hey, don’t talk smack, she didn’t have a clue of where you were or what you were doing, you just disappeared,” Yoongi said trying to stand protectively in front of you.
“What are you talking about?? I left her a note. On the bed right before I left. I was scared, I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t want to drag her with me to something that could potentially fall apart and leave us homeless” Jungkook explained.
You stared at him confused “Note??”
“Yes, I left you a letter, right beside where you were sleeping on top of the blankets” he replied, “Wait did you even read the letter? Did you even see it?”
You looked down completely baffled by your own stupidity. You met his eyes and then scurried towards the room you had once shared with him. The urge to look through every corner for the mysterious letter taking a front seat in your mind. It didn’t even take you 10 seconds to find the letter, it was neatly laying underneath your bed as if it was placed there by magic. The urge to facepalm yourself almost winning over your urge to cry in absolute dismay.
This letter right here was about to mend you or break you all over again.
 You looked back towards the door, the two boys standing there frozen in place. You looked at them both as silence took over the room. The letter in your hand felt like it was burning through your emotions. Nothing mattered more than the words written down in that piece of paper.
 Yoongi looked at you for a second and then back at Jungkook. An expression of defeat as he uttered “I think I should go”
You looked at him through your tear-filled eyes “I am sorry Yoongi”
 “Just….call me. Let me know you are okay before you head to bed” he said as he walked off. Not even giving Jungkook a second glance. Yoongi’s heart had been stomped on and it was all your fault.
 “I am sorry Yoongi” you whispered again as your focus went back to the item in your hands.
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  (y/n),
I am sorry for taking off without saying goodbye, but I know how much you hate them.
If you take 15+ minutes to hang up on a phone call I would never leave the apartment.
I will be back though I promise. I am leaving without my phone or anything. I want this to be as quick as possible to get back to you. Once I assure this is not a too good to be true gimmick I’ll be back for you my love. We will move to the city together and I will make you mine forever. I love you so much and I am sorry for doing this without any prior notice. We have been through so much together already that a few months will be nothing on us.
You can hit me, scratch me, and make me your sex slave for years to come after I come back, but please do not forget about us. Do not give up. Be strong for me my love, like I’ll be strong for you. Listen to my radio shows and tv interviews, you will be mentioned in each one till I am back in your arms. I LOVE YOU!!!!
 Your KookieMonster
  Jungkook laid in your bed listening to the whole fiasco that had happened while he was gone. A smile of amusement plastered on his face much to your surprise. You were expecting yelling, and an endless number of accusing fingers your way, but all you got were smiles and chuckles in his behalf.
 “Why are you laughing??” you said crossing your arms and pouting “I was broken, I hated you, and I am now 2,000 dollars in debt to the city”
 “I am laughing because you could’ve avoided all this shit if you did your adulting correctly and actually did your bed,” he said as he stood up and walk towards you.
 The tears that you were holding back spilling out like a leaky faucet, “It hurt…. it hurt so much”
 “I know babe, but I am here now,” he says cradling in his arms. Those arms you have missed so much.
 “I love you so much …..so so much” you whispered as you peppered kisses along his face.
 He grasps your face in between his two hands and finally your lips meet. Desperation evident in every lick and bite.
A moan escapes your lips as you let him guide you back into bed. The past is forgotten and ripped away with every piece of clothing that was starting to pile up onto the floor.
 Jungkook backs away after both of your shirts are off, snapping you out of your heated hunger.  Your arms shooting automatically upward to pull him back to you.
“Wait are you sure you want to do this??” he asked with half-lidded eyes.
The same eyes you have dreamt about every night since you have last seen them were in front of you once again……. And your heart...your stupid heart…..is the one you follow as you kiss him again answering his previous question.
He stops you once again causing you to sigh in annoyance.
“Mood killer,” you say playfully as he scurries to get something from his pant’s pocket.
He pops out a ring and lands himself on one knee.
The confusing in your face is quite evident for her tries to explain what is happening before you reject him.
“It is not a wedding proposal….it’s a promise. I know I fucked up when I left you behind. From now on I promise I will never leave your side, and once we are up and not in debt we will do the whole white dress and big party thing” he says reassuring you.
You smile at him replaying his words in your head and then something clicks “Wait, what do you mean in debt??”
He shrugs his shoulders as if he was a child about to be scolded, “Well I kind of broke the contract when I came back here. I just couldn’t stand being without you anymore….I couldn’t so I left”
“Wait….you know you could’ve called me right?” you asked searching his eyes.
He dismissively shook his head “Not the same, plus I doubted you would’ve answered the phone when I didn’t even give you a proper see you later”
You rolled your eyes…..
“(y/n), my knee,” he said making a faint yelp as he tried to keep balanced “It is getting numb”
“Silly, stand up,” you said trying to pull him up.
“NOT TILL YOU ANSWER,” he said in between his teeth clearly in pain but stubborn as hell.
You looked at the boy in front of you. The one that had made you jump through hoops and see the world in a different perspective in a matter of months. The guy who was a complete and utter fuck up just like you.
You kissed him hard letting every emotion out in that kiss.
He looked at you dreamily “Is that a yes??”
“I’ll let you know in the morning,” you said as you grasped him from the arms and pulled him towards you, your new blankets about to be blessed by both your bodies tangling and fusing into one.
Whatever tomorrow brought doesn’t matter as long as there was a Jungkook in your life….. No matter how, where, or when….as long as he was beside you.
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