#I mean this is more pointed than I usually like to be on here but Come On

[themaveriqueagenda]

this is really interesting! though parts of it seem slightly contradictory, because there's this

please apply them at will to yourself based on your own ideas about what it means to dress femininely or dramatically or androgynously etc.

but also this:

describing [...] a presentation others might consider masculine/feminine

is it up to one's own interpretation or about how others see you? particularly as an apothibinary person i have a lot of trouble taking on other people's perceptions of me as a self-descriptor, because they're usually binary(-adjacent). i'm also flat out just not going to give people power over my words like that. (i'm not saying that anyone who identifies as masc/fem because that's how others perceive them is wrong btw. i know many do it for simplicity as well as for self-empowerment. i just personally cannot.)

i also take issue with the

masc---fem scale

because if we can acknowledge that the gender spectrum itself isn't linear like that, we must acknowledge this about the spectrum of gender presentation too. you can be outside of the masc---fem scale or you can just simply not label your gender presentation at all.

another thing that feels a little off to me is that fox is described as an

androgynous, fluid, or combined presentation

while also being described as

[not resembling] the other sides of the spectrum

that latter definition is actually broader than androgynous, fluid or combined, as it does technically also include anything outside of that scale or nothing at all, but it's not truly accounting for that.

i'm aware the chart exists mainly for lighthearted silliness, but also you can say that masculinity and femininity are up to interpretation all you want, the chart is once again very stereotypical and doesn't really leave wiggle room for people with broader definitions of masculinity, femininity or androgyny. for example, i sometimes like wearing dresses which most would consider swan/feminine, but i feel deeply uncomfortable calling myself or my dresses feminine or swan (because let's be real, swan here is just another word for feminine).

i know this post is over 7 years old so how we talk about nonbinary presentation has evolved a bit. i'd be curious if anyone ever expanded on these terms to account for other gender presentations.

nonetheless, if i had to put myself on that scale, i'd probably be a crow-fox, because not resembling the other sides is the most how i conceptualise my gender presentation.

however, at this point, i don't really use any gender presentation terms, not even maverine or other outherine terms, because i no longer find them personally helpful to me. i could dress in exclusively skirts and dresses and i would still not consider my gender presentation feminine because i consider that to be misgendering. most people would perceive me as feminine though if i did that, so at that point, i wouldn't really be communicating anything if i called my presentation maverine when everyone else sees someone feminine. at this point, my gender presentation is synonymous with my gender. i'm maverique, so everything i wear is also maverique.

hopefully other people can get more use of this spectrum though and i'd be curious where all the maveriques & friends fall on this.

Non-binary Presentation Terms

Although words like butch, femme, masc, and fem have been applied to nonbinary folk since their inception, they don’t always meet the needs of non-binary people in comfortably describing the way we look. 

So here are a new additional set of options! We���ve considered two different “axes” here – one that relates most closely to the masc—fem scale, and one that considers “effort”, or a level of… drama or ostentation in a look. They can be combined as one pleases or used individually! 

Additionally, please apply them at will to yourself based on your own ideas about what it means to dress femininely or dramatically or androgynously etc. These words are not to be held hostage to cissexism or gender roles. These words also describe presentations that are inherently not binary – the only reason we’re using words like “masculine” and “feminine” to describe them at all is for ease of communication. They can and should describe particular looks, including those that people are inclined to gender, without actually gendering them. 

Note: These are not coined with the intention of being gender identities. They have nothing inherently to do with gender identity. You can be a demigirl stag, etc. (That said, if someone wants to use them as a gender because you feel it’s tied closely to your presentation, we’re certainly not stopping you.) 

Here they are!

Stag: A “masc”, “butch” or “tomcat” equivalent, describing a presentation one considers to be associated with ideas about masculinity, or a presentation others might consider masculine. 

Fox: Describing an androgynous, fluid, or combined presentation; can be applied to any presentation a person feels doesn’t resemble the other sides of the spectrum.  

Swan: A “femme/fem” or “doe” equivalent, describing a presentation one considers to be associated with ideas about femininity, or a presentation others might consider feminine. 

Sparrow: A casual, minimalist, muted or low-effort presentation. For example, for those folks who just roll through their closet and go. 

Crow: For presentations that are in-between, combined, or fluid along a scale of effort/ostentation. 

Peacock: For presentations that are high effort. Glam, dramatic, flashy, flamboyant, attention-drawing, etc. Dressed to the nines, so to speak! 

so anyway tag urself

(chart meant purely to be silly and fun, not to suggest actual criteria or associations. Disregard entirely if you resonate with the terms but not these goofy tidbits.)

Keep reading

[wetpussyju1ce]

the smallest Omega in town takes on the biggest Alpha.

+18 mdni

Alpha!König x Omega!fem reader

note: reader is described as skinny. small wrists and bony knees. shorter than the 141.

John's pack was known to be extremely loyal and fiercely protective over each other. They were nice though, friendly and liked to mingle with other packs and families in the village.

They were also extremely close to each other and in tune with each other's needs. And that's how the pack found out that König, their big, awkward Alpha, needed a bit of help when it came to ruts.

He usually spends them alone, much to his packs disagreement over those arrangements because it can't be good for you, it can't! Then they decided to take matters into their own hands and try to find König a rut partner. It was a very serious matter for them, they coaxed König out of details and descriptions about what he likes. They know he doesn't really have a preference if they're Alpha, Omega or Beta. So that's a good start.

He likes them pretty, soft around the edges and smaller than him, which could be literally anyone in the whole village considering his sheer size.

And that was about it.

So Johnny, Kyle, Simon and John went to work. Looking for willing unmated wolves to spend König's ruts w him. Surprisingly it was easy to find willing partners, they know König, have seen him around and the idea of being impaled on his knot was attractive to quite a few of them.

But the real problem started when König asked for a try-out, before his rut hits, because he knows that a knot of his size could be considered a weapon. And he doesn't want to feel the rejection and hurt during his rut when he realises his partner can't take him, or are scared of hurting.

So they accepted, all of them, pretty Alphas, shy Omegas and tiny Betas.

And it didn't go well, they all believed it could be achievable, like how big can he really be? Body-horror big, apparently because what the fuck.

Oh and König knew to anticipate this. The gods made a joke out of him when building him in his mother's womb. They gave him everything it was to be a perfect Alpha, and gave him the biggest knot that no Omega, or Alphsa/Beta could take. It was ridiculous.

He lost hope and decided to busy himself with rut preparations, stocking up one of their many cottages deep in the forest, away from everyone.

His pack was sad for their sweet Alpha, it pulled at their heart to smell his upset scent. he scented sad and defeated and they really wanted to try harder, to make it all better.

it got to a point where they had no idea what more could they do because obviously nobody could take his knot without causing themselves injuries. and their Alpha can't be alone forever, surely??? I mean, that's a bit dramatic but he obviously craved that type of connection and bond with someone. he can't knot his fist and someone's thighs, forever, it wasnt enough!

and when all hope seemed lost their doorbell rang.

and there she was. the tiniest Omega they've ever seen. well, she wasnt that small, but compared to them, she sure as hell was, dainty and skinny too, bony knees and tiny wrists. she was standing there, wearing a pair of shorts, boots and a t-shirt under a flannel, she looked like she just finished gardening, dirt stuck to her knees and caking her boots.

"Hello?" Simon greeted, confused.

"Is König in?" She asked, looking up at the taller man.

"No, why?" Simon raised a brow.

"Oh and I'm here for the rut partner try-out, thing. if that's still happening." She said, shrugging, all casual.

Simon's mind screeched to a stop, did she say try-outs?? is that how everyone in the village saw it as?? what in the hell??

"What the hell are you talking about?" Simon said, utterly confused.

"What? Did he find someone?" She tilted her head to the side, confused.

"No, no-- Just, what makes you think you can take his knot? You're fucking tiny." Simon went straight to the point.

She smiled, kind and unbothered, "I know he's big, I heard all sorts of things, but I believe I can help, and if it works, I'd also like an arrangement out of it, a heat partner if he'd be willing."

Simon feels like he should slam the door on her face. Just to save her guts from absolute and sure destruction by König's cock because no way in hell would she be able to take him. but then the Omega looks sure of herself. not cocky. just looks friendly and honest and she looks ready to help.

Simon maybe should have asked her to save her guts and go away but he doesn't. he let's her in, not knowing that she has spent years of her heats trying to shove as much of her toys inside her as possible. she doesn't even mention the fact that she ends up fisting her cunt every heat cycle. or when she has a heat partner w a knot, that knot ends up inside her alongside a toy at the same time.

the Omega ends up meeting König, says she would like to help. he disagrees at first because he's not in the mood to take her to the hospital, he really really doesn't want to hurt her. but then she begs him to trust her w the sweetest face he's ever seen, lets him scent honesty all over her and he agrees to give her a chance.

König n the Omega end up talking abt gardening and the sellers at the market and the prices these days. they quickly bond over growing vegetables and their shared dislike for that one guy that sells strawberries and swears that they're that naturally huge (and they're not even sweet, what the hell??)

they agree on a date, and a time, they would try to see how it goes before König's rut hits, and if everything goes alright, they'll spend it together.

when they meet, König's weary, she's not, calm and happy as a clam. she asks him to trust her, and it starts off easy, she holds his hands and König shivers because his are literally giant mitts compared to hers. she sweet talks him into relaxing, she sits on his lap and they start talking a little, then she goes ahead and kisses him and he realises very quickly that he likes that, he really does, her lips taste sweet and her scent is so sweet and delicious.

König's alpha quickly realises that this may actually work and he gets excited in record time, tents his trousers and gets his mouth on her tits, it takes no time for her to start leaking like a broken faucet. König's hand are slippery between her legs and he's about to pass out at the intensity of it all. she's everywhere around him and all he can do is suck on her breasts and purr.

then he gets a finger inside her tight and warm hole. it's wet and feels soft. then another goes next. and another. all the while she's making all sorts of noises, clawing at him, and the more fingers he can push inside her the more he's awed and amazed because for someone so tiny and fragile, she sure as hell can take so much inside her.

König wants a better view so he gets her on the bed, laying on her back and absolutely hammers his fingers inside her cunt, watching her stomach bulge everytime he drives his fingers in.

he's about to lose his mind at the sight alone, and then she cries, squeals and squirts all over his hand and arm.

König then gathers her in his arms, chest to chest, gets his arms under her legs, as they're pressed against her body, practically folding her in half, carrying all of her weight in his massive arms like she was just a doll to him, and finally dips the head of his cock between her pussy lips. he starts to push further in and she's moaning, clawing at his neck, he gets halfway in and he's sweating bullets because she's so tight and she's pulsing around him and yet, he knows she can take more. and he was right because he keeps dropping her on his length until it's all inside, to the root, and she wails, comes again, shaking in his arms and König is losing his mind, his knot swelling in record time. when he comes, he's dizzy and he's heaving like he ran a marathon and he hasn't even thrusted inside of her just yet.

they make all sorts of noises when fucking. it's animalistic. König sounds like he's about to pass out and the Omega sounds like that's what she's been waiting for all of her life. It was filthy, intense and so fucking loud that when Gaz was sent to check on them, as they used one of the many cottages John's pack owns, the moment the smell hits his nose, he freezes and turns back around, he does not want to be anywhere near them if that's how potent their combined scent is.

at least he knows they're having a great time. so he goes back, well, more like runs back to the house, a little bit scared and excited because finally their Alpha got to knot someone!

and when all that's said and done, and the Omega and alpha come back to the shared house the next day. König is out of it, nothing but statics behind his eyes while the Omega looks content, eats everything she's offered by König's pack, starved. but winces once in a while when she moves in a certain way. she scents happy, and König scents confused but content nonetheless. and that's everything his pack wished for.

[urmum-lovesme]

Angel Baby - Rafe Cameron x Kook!reader P7

pairing: Best Friend!Rafe Cameron x Kook!Best-Friend!reader

summary: Rafe and Reader have known each other since kindergarten, always side by side, the king and princess of Figure 8. So why now does he start feeling different towards her, when all she's ever been is his best friend?

a/n: MERRY CHRISTMAS MY SEXYS!!!!!!! For the holidays thought I'd ramp things up, Let's see, Y/n's a bit of a diva in this tbh, she's a little cheeky, get it ig she's just a girl after all. Midsummer's is well underway, little feature from the gangs group chat and y/n and rafe? well cue careless whisper and shut your eyes *wink wink nudge nudge*. I've never actually written smut before so cut me some slack but it's lowkey inspired by Chappell's 'Picture You' iygwim... Love you all so so so much, enjoy and have a great holiday!!!!!!!!!!

warnings: nsfw! smut, self pleasure (rafe), kinda pervy rafe? (idk idk don't shoot me) dismissive mother figure (y/n lowkey got mommy issues ngl), drugs, smoking, alcohol, driving under the influence, suggestive behaviour (y/n).

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Midsummers was lingering around the corner, Y/n pacing at her front door anxiously as she waited for the courier, peering out the window by the door in hopes of sighting the van pulling up by the gates. If he didn’t show up in the next five minutes she was going to have a meltdown. Her phone ringing loudly made her jump, she looked down to the device vibrating on the counter as she picked it up the name ‘Rafey’ shining up at her,

“Hey Princess”

Rafe was sat in his room, lounging back on his bed, mindlessly staring up at the ceiling fan which was revolving in slow turns. It was Midsummers today, and he was feeling antsy, knowing he needed to get a gift for the girl, he wanted to get her the best gift possible, their little tradition starting when he got her a small bouquet of flowers a few years ago, he liked to say that it was her early birthday present, but it was truly just an excuse for him to get her something. Of course this year it had to be better, after the night a few days ago, after his.. realisation that the girl was more than just a ‘best-friend’, he knew the evening was his chance to talk to her.

If that's what you wanna call it then-

Y/n pressed the phone to her ear, her voice slightly breathless as she answered, “Hey, what’s up?”

“Where are you?” Rafe’s voice rang out over the phone, straight to the point as usual.

“At home. Waiting for the courier.” She started pacing again, one hand holding the phone, the other tugging nervously at the hem of her shirt as she started to ramble. 

“They’re late, and if they don’t show up soon, I’m screwed. I need this dress or I’m literally not coming. I’m not coming Rafe -do you know how embarrassing it would be to wear the sam-“

“Relax,” Rafe said, his tone steady but with the faintest hint of amusement. “You’re gonna give yourself a heart attack.”

“I can’t relax!” she snapped, her frustration spilling over. “Do you know how much this means? If I don’t have it ready by tonight-”

“I know, I know,” he interrupted, the girl was prone to overthinking, his voice softening. “It's a big deal. You’ve been talking about it non-stop for the past two weeks but freaking out isn’t going to help.”

Y/n groaned, slumping against the wall near her door. “Easy for you to say. You’re not the one on the verge of public humiliation.”

There was a pause on the other end of the line, then he spoke again, quieter this time.

“What’s really going on..?”

She hesitated, her fingers tightening around the phone. She opened her mouth to respond, but the sound of a car pulling up outside made her stop. Her head whipped toward the window, and she exhaled in relief.

“Courier’s here,” she said quickly. “I gotta go.”

“Y/n—” Rafe started, but she hung up before he could finish.

Whoopsies

Fucking brat

She shoved the phone into her pocket and opened the door, stepping out onto the porch as the courier climbed out of their van. The man carried a medium-sized box toward her, looking apologetic.

“Sorry for the delay,” the courier said, handing it over.

“It’s fine, thank you.” Y/n muttered, clutching the package to her chest like it was a lifeline. She watched the courier leave before heading back inside, shutting the door behind her. Her phone buzzed again, and she pulled it out to see another call from Rafe. She sighed, debating whether to answer. Part of her wanted to ignore it and focus on the package, but the other part of her knew Rafe wouldn’t just let it go -he was probably going to scold her for hanging up.

“Hi, again-”

“-Don’t ‘hi’ me,”

Rafe shot back. “You hung up on me. What’s going on?”

The girl sat down on the couch, setting the box beside her. She took a deep breath. “It’s just… a lot, okay? Everything has to be perfect tomorrow, and mom’s been on my back about it and I’m scared I’ll mess it up.” She trailed off, biting her lip.

“Right” Rafe spoke out, though she could already hear the knowing tone creeping into his voice.

“Shut up,” she mumbled, though her cheeks were already burning, she felt embarrassed she was so bothered,

Always overthinking

Just a dumb party

“Listen,” Rafe said, his tone turning serious again. “You’ve been stressing yourself out, I get it—you want to impress everyone.”

She didn’t answer, but the silence spoke volume.

“Y/n, you’re already... pretty amazing,” he continued. “You don’t need some big, grand gesture to prove that.” His words caught her off guard, and for a moment, she didn’t know how to respond. Finally, she whispered, 

“Thanks, Rafe.”

“Anytime,” he said lightly. “Now go open that box and finish whatever masterpiece you’re working on. And stop overthinking.”

“Okay, okay,” she said, a small smile creeping onto her face. “Talk later?”

“Always,” he replied before hanging up. Y/n set the phone down, staring at the box beside her. Rafe’s words lingered in her mind as she reached for it opening it, fingers sliding over the soft silky material. 

You better look good bitch

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The girl sat at her vanity, dabbing a final touch of highlighter onto her cheekbones, as her hands moved down to tighten the belt around her waist of the fuzzy robe she had on. The soft music filled the background as she admired the dress hanging nearby, waiting to be put on. She picked up her phone, her fingers tapped against the screen, nails causing little clicks to rise into the air of the room, mixing in with the soft sound of the music playing in the background. She typed to the group chat,

Princess. :  Lowkey might be late … 

She hesitated for a moment, then hit send, her phone buzzed almost immediately.

Young Rich & Sexy (1 unread message)

Rafey  :  u got ur whole life planned out to the minute tf u mean ur late 

Princess  :  Fashionably ofc 

Kels :  Why are you such a 

Kelc  :  Wait what is it she says 

T-man : Diva 

Kels  :  Yeah 

Kels  :  Why are you being a diva 

Princess  :  You guys are so dramatic. I’m just finishing up, okay?

T-man  :  Nah

Rafey  :  “finishing up” means ur still running around in a robe and slippers

Princess  :  It’s nothing!!!

Princess  :  Just running a little behind

Rafey  :  Oh, so you’re spiralling

T-man :  Got it

Kels  : How many outfit changes are we at? Three? Four?

T-man  :  Five Minimum

Princess  :  I hate all of you

Rafey  :  Big words. 

Rafey  :  Are you actually leaving, though?

Kels  :  Yeah, just get here before Rafe starts flirting with himself in the mirror

Rafey  :  Shut up

Rafey :  At least I don’t take an hour deciding on a bowtie like you

Kels  : ...

Kels  :  Fuck you 

T-man  :  Y/n, this is what happens when you’re not around to keep us in line

Princess  :  Are you guys drinking already? 

Rafe  :  Yes 

Kels  :  No 

T-man  :  Yes 

Kels  :  Oh 

Kels  :  Yes? 

Kels  :  BAHAHAHAH

Princess  : You’re all hopeless 

She grabbed her clutch and slipped her phone into it, giving herself one final once-over in the mirror before heading out the door of her bedroom to meet her parents downstairs. The group chat continued buzzing, but she ignored it, feet padding down the stairs to slip on her heels.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The driver eased the car to a smooth stop in front of the country club, a line of luxury cars wound behind them, each filled with kooks dressed to the nines, ready to celebrate… what was it again? 

Something about tradition, about status-  

She stepped out of the car, the setting sun warm against her skin as she adjusted her dress. She followed closely behind her parents, her father offering a polite nod to the valet while her mother stepped forward, her sharp eyes scanning the scene. Before the girl could take another step toward the entrance, her mother’s hand landed lightly on her arm, stopping her in her tracks. Y/N turned, surprised by the tight grip and the serious expression etched on her mother’s face.

“Wait,” Marie said in a hushed tone, her voice low but firm enough to cut through the murmurs of the other guests near the entrance. She straightened, smoothing an invisible crease on her dress before turning her full attention to her daughter. Y/N raised an eyebrow.

“What?”

Her mother’s lips pressed into a thin line. “I want to remind you to be on your best behaviour tonight.”

Y/N rolled her eyes. “I’m always on my best behaviour.”

“Don’t be clever,” her mother snapped quietly, her tone just sharp enough to sting. “This isn’t just some casual get-together. It’s important. People are watching, Y/N. People who matter.” She emphasised to the girl.

Classic

“Watching for what, exactly?” Y/N shot back, her voice dripping with sarcasm. 

“To see if I chew with my mouth closed or if I trip on my heels?”

Her mother’s jaw tightened. “To see if you’re worthy of standing in this room. To see if you reflect the family we’ve worked hard to build. You think reputation doesn’t matter, but it does. It matters more than you realise.”

Y/N crossed her arms, her posture defiant. “Right, because it’s all about what they think, isn’t it?”

“Yes,” her mother said sharply, her eyes narrowing.

“You don’t have to like it, but you will respect it. Your father and I have done everything to ensure we’re respected. I won’t have you undo it with some thoughtless remark or petty argument.”

Y/N clenched her jaw, biting back the words bubbling on her tongue. She hated these conversations- hated being reminded that she wasn’t just herself but an extension of her family’s carefully constructed image. Her mother’s gaze softened slightly, but her voice remained steady. 

“This isn’t just about us, Y/N. One day, it will matter for you, too. You’ll see that eventually.”

Before Y/N could respond, her father’s voice cut through the tension. “Are we going in, or are we standing out here all night hmm?” The man could never notice the tension between the two women, he only saw his caring wife and sweet daughter. He leant down pressing a kiss to his wife’s cheek before wrapping his hand around Y/n’s waist pulling her towards him holding both women closely, “my girls.” 

Her mother straightened, her composure snapping back, she gave Y/N a once-over, her expression unreadable, before turning toward the entrance taking her husbands hand and walking with him. The man turned his head back shortly, sending a wink in the girls direction, her fathers action brought a small smile to her face. With a deep breath, she pushed her frustration from her mother comments aside and followed her parents into the club, the sound of clinking glasses and polite laughter greeting them as the door swung open.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The scent of champagne and roses hung heavy in the air as Y/N stepped further inside, clutching the stem of a freshly poured flute. She felt the weight of eyes on her as she moved through the room, the navy fabric skimmed her body, hugging her waist before cascading to the floor in soft ripples. It was all so curated, so polished, but Y/N barely registered the scene. Not until her eyes landed on Rafe. He was standing near the bar, leaning casually against the counter, a glass of whiskey in his hand. His sharp jawline caught the light as he turned slightly, his shoulders broad under the perfectly tailored suit jacket he wore. 

As if sensing her gaze, he looked up. Their eyes met for a split second, his brow raising slightly as a smirk tugged at the corner of his lips.

His grip on the glass tightened as he straightened subtly, his attention narrowing entirely on Y/N as she entered the room. She was impossible to miss, even in the crowd. The navy satin of her dress shimmered under the light. His eyes trailed upward, catching on the delicate V of the neckline that framed her collarbones, which glowed faintly with a soft sheen. Her hair, threaded with tiny white flowers, was swept back to reveal the curve of her neck. She looked…

Wow

His throat felt dry.

Rafe’s gaze followed her as she moved toward the bar, her posture poised but relaxed, her fingers curling around a champagne flute. As she made her way towards the boy, she noticed Topper and Kelce standing behind him, eyeing up a group of girls giggling by the tables.

“Surpriseeee.”

She sang out as she did a little spin in front of the boy, the silk swaying with her. “Only,” she looks over to the clock on the wall, “15 minutes late.”

His eyes ran down over her body as her movement, a little smirk on his face before he chuckled at her comment,

“15 minutes? Might as well have not showed” He teased her as he tilted his head, looking down at her once again.

“Asshole.” She mutters out shoving his shoulder slightly before she looked over at him. 

Damn

“You look good,” she spoke genuinely, her hand coming out to smooth down the blazer she’d shifted as she pushed him, she spoke playfully,

“handsome.”

He watched her as she smoothed the non-existent wrinkles in his blazer, his heart faltering at her compliment.

Handsome huh?

“You look….you look beautiful Y/n” He spoke out quietly, leaning in a little closer to her, his eyes roaming over her face.

A pink hue lifted to her cheeks at his words as her hand trailed down from his chest where she’d smoothed the blazer out, down his arm, to his hand, where her fingers brushed against his, a warm feeling settled in his stomach as her fingers danced over his hand.

“Thanks.” She spoke out quietly. Their moment was interrupted by the sound of a wolf whistle, Topper and Kelce stumbling over towards them as they looked Y/n. 

“Kook Princess does it again!”

“Looking good.”

Kelce and Topper speak out to her, both stepping forward, one placing a kiss on her cheek as the other wraps his arms around her in a hug.

“You look like you just stepped out of a magazine. Like, one of those fancy ones with the shiny covers.” Kelce started to babble, Topper following soon after, 

“Like the ones you collect what are they cal-“

“Vogue?” The girl asked amused smile on her face at their antics.

“Fuck yeah you look fresh out of Vogue.” Kelce spoke with a shake of his head.

Never heard that one before

“You two always know how to make a girl feel special.” She shot them a playful wink of her own, clearly unbothered by their banter.

“Well I’d hope all those hours of getting ready weren't for nothing.”

She speaks as she looks over to the group of girls huddling together, a hushed giggle breaking out as Topper and Kelce turn around to look at them, one of the girls lifting her hand and wiggling her fingers in a small wave. She spoke to the two boys as Rafe watched, leaning back against the bar counter,

“But you guys clean up well, heard you’ve been turning heads tonight..” 

“More like giving head..” 

The girls eyes widen as she lets out a loud laugh hand coming up to cover her mouth. 

“Are you being for real?” She whispers out in a hush as the boy next to her shrugs his shoulder in a nonchalant manner a smirk rising to his face, she pushes Kelce away from her, his hand dropping from her waist, 

“Ew you freak” she giggled as she shakes her head. 

The boys rambled to each other defensively as she shook her head rolling her eyes at them turning back to Rafe. Y/N reached up absentmindedly to adjust her necklace, a habit she couldn’t seem to shake, only to freeze when her fingers brushed against bare skin. Her brow furrowed as she searched for the familiar chain, but it wasn’t there. 

Shit

“I forgot my necklace.” She spoke out frown on her face.

Rafe, who had been watching her from the corner of his eye, leaned in with a teasing smile, the missing chain on her neck was one of the first thing’s he’d noticed when she’d gotten closer to him. 

"You wear it everyday? How’d you forget it tonight"

"I don’t know. I just got distracted.” She shrugged as hint of disappointment in her tone.

Rafe’s smile softened, and he raised an eyebrow. 

Perfect 

“Come on, I’ve got something to show you.”

“What is it?”

Y/N glanced up at him, surprised her head tilting slightly.

He flashed her a grin “C'mon," he said, gently taking her hand. 

"Follow me."

The girl slipped her hand into the crook of his arm which he held out for her as he led her away from the main group, stepping out from under the harsh lights and into the quieter side of the party, where the music felt distant and the crowd’s chatter muffled. She followed him curiously, the sound of her heels tapping against the floor drowned out by the thrum of the distant bass. When they reached a secluded corner, Rafe pulled away from her and slipped his hand into the inside pocket of his blazer. Y/N raised an eyebrow, her interest piqued. 

“Here.”

He pulled out a small, velvet blue box, holding it out to her.

“It’s your Midsummer’s present."

Y/N blinked, taken aback. "What?" She hadn't been expecting anything, especially not tonight.

What-

Rafe’s smile was genuine, one that didn’t appear often.

“Our tradition? We’ve been doing this for years, -yeah well I have I guess"

Y/N’s heart fluttered in her chest. A small gift- something thoughtful, not extravagant, but always meaningful. And somehow, she’d forgotten about it this year, she’d been so fussed with her dress and her mother, the boy being occupied with his family's business, she didn’t think Rafe would bother this year.

Her fingers brushed over the soft velvet as she took the box from him, her heart skipping a beat as she opened it. Inside lay a dainty, golden necklace, delicate but elegant, with a tiny heart-shaped pendant hanging from it. The pendant was engraved with their initials-

Y/N . R  

Y/N’s breath caught in her throat as she stared at it for a moment, a soft smile tugging at her lips. The necklace was beautiful, but what really moved her was the thought behind it. It was a symbol of their years of friendship, of the connection they shared that went beyond just tradition.

"Rafe… this is…" She looked up at him, her voice soft with gratitude. “It’s perfect.”

“Yeah? You like it”

"I love it Rafe seriously.”

Y/N held the small velvet box in her hands, her fingers still lingering over the necklace inside. Rafe stood in front of her, a soft smile on his lips, watching her with a quiet intensity that made her heart race. She wasn’t sure what she was expecting, but something about the way he was looking at her made the whole moment feel different—more meaningful than it was in the past years when he’d given her presents.

He smiled, his gaze tender. “I’m glad you like it.”

She nodded, the gesture simple but meaningful. She felt a lump form in her throat, a surge of warmth filling her chest. “Thank you.” She closed the box and stepped forward, pulling him into a tight hug. “Really. I love it.” Rafe returned the hug, his hands resting gently on her back. When she pulled away, he held her at arm's length, a playful glint in his eyes. 

“Want me to put it on for you?”

Y/N laughed softly, feeling a mix of warmth and comfort from his presence. “Yeah, I’d like that.”

Without breaking eye contact, Rafe gently took the necklace from the box, the soft gold chain catching the light as he held it in his hands. His movements were slow, deliberate, as though he was savouring every moment. He stepped a little closer, and Y/N’s breath hitched, her heart fluttering in her chest. She felt his warmth before she even saw him move, the proximity suddenly making the air around them feel heavier, charged with something unspoken. His hands were steady, sure, but there was a tenderness to them as they reached out, the chain dangling between his fingers.

Rafe’s fingers gently grazed the back of her neck as he moved to place the necklace around her, his touch barely there but still enough to send a shiver down her spine. She held her breath for a moment, feeling the heat of his skin against hers, the soft brush of his fingertips making her skin tingle.

There was something so simple, so intimate about it.

"Hold still," he murmured, barely audible.

She felt the coolness of the chain against her skin, and then, the soft click of the clasp as he fastened it around her neck.

“There,” he said, his voice low but warm. “Perfect.”

When he stepped back, his gaze never leaving hers, Y/N’s heart was still pounding in her chest. She touched the pendant, feeling the cool gold between her fingers, but her mind was still caught on the feel of his touch.

“You look beautiful,” he said quietly, his voice almost a whisper.

“Rafe,” she said, her voice thick with emotion she hadn’t expected to feel. 

“This… this means so much.”

"I’m happy," he began, his voice lower than usual, as he fidgeted with the cuff of his blazer. 

"I didn’t know what to get you this year, so-“

“You didn’t need to get me anything.’

“-I wanted to.”

He swallowed hard, trying to gather his thoughts. He hesitated as he looked at her, the necklace catching the light, glimmering as it rested against her skin. His bowtie suddenly felt awfully tight his tongue darted out to wet his dry lips, his breath feeling short. His shaky hand raised to his neck, finger shoving between his shirt and neck to loosen the material. Standing there right in front of him, he couldn't look away from her. His gaze lingered on her, a mix of admiration and something deeper—something he had been fighting to ignore for a long time. His heart was thudding so harshly against his chest he felt like he was going to pass out, he stepped just a little closer, his breath catching in his throat. 

Say it now

He needed to.

“Y/N,” he started again, his voice quieter, but no less intense, he hesitated, his pulse racing as his eyes met hers. 

"I lo—"

“Y/N!” 

He jerked his head up, the words dying on his lips as he looked toward the source of the loud voice.

Wheezie yelled out as she pranced over to the girl happily wide smile on her face, Y/n’s head turned to look to her arms reaching out to catch the younger girl who’d bounded straight into her arms.

Fuck 

Y/N’s expression softened immediately, and before she could even say a word, Wheezie was already wrapping her arms around Y/N’s waist, pulling her into a tight hug. Y/N let out a strained laugh and returned the hug. 

Any time but now...

“Y/N!” Wheezie squealed, her voice full of excitement. “I missed you so much! I haven't seen you in like forever!”

Rafe stood there, frozen, watching them. His heart thudded heavily in his chest, the weight of the moment hanging thick in the air between them. His confession- his almost confession- had been so close.

So close, in fact, that it almost felt like it was still hanging there, unspoken. 

Y/N smiled down at Wheezie, her arms around her tightly. "I know, I’ve missed you too, Wheezie," she said warmly. 

"Things have been a little busy lately,” her eyes glanced over to Rafe as she spoke out. The boy cleared his throat, trying to shake off the tension, obvious to his sister. His eyes flicked from Wheezie back to Y/N, the opportunity was gone now. 

The words he had almost said to her- words that had been building in him for weeks, months even- seemed to slip away, lost in the noise of the party around them.

He gave a tight smile, feeling a mixture of frustration and amusement. "Yeah," he said, trying to sound casual, even though his voice felt heavier than usual. 

"Real busy."

Y/N, sensing the shift in the air, gave him a small but reassuring smile. She knew him too well, probably more than anyone else did. Wheezie ignored their silent interaction, eyes wide with excitement. 

“You will not believe what I just found out!” She looked back and forth between them.

Rafe groaned at his sister.

Fucks sake

“Wheezie, not now…”

“You know Audrey and Max? They’re hooking up! For real!” She threw her hands up dramatically, as if she announced the discovery of the century. 

“I heard them talking at the bar. They think they’re being all secretive, but—hello?!

Y/N’s brows furrowed slightly as she processed the gossip, but she couldn’t help but laugh. “Wait, seriously?”

“I was like, what? Audrey and Max? So sneaky!” Wheezie shook her head. The younger girl smiled smugly, then turned her attention to Rafe, who was standing there, still trying to regain his bearings. She raised an eyebrow, noticing the odd tension hanging in the air. 

“What’s going on here?” she asked with a sly grin.

“Are you two like, having a moment?”

Rafe blinked, caught off guard by her sudden shift in focus. His heart was still racing and now, his younger sister was teasing him about it. He forced a smile, shaking his head slightly. 

“No, just… catching up,” he said, his voice a little more strained than usual.

Wheezie raised an eyebrow, her playful expression shifting to something more teasing, glancing back and forth between them. She squinted at them, clearly working out what she thought was going on. 

“Are you guys fuc-” 

Y/N’s eyes widened in surprise, her cheeks flushing slightly, 

Uh-

“What!? No, we’re just…” She stumbled over her words, clearly trying to keep things casual. 

“Wheezie, don’t be ridiculous.” Rafe spoke out to the girl in a disapproving tone.

Really not helping here.

Wheezie just raised her eyebrows, clearly unconvinced. “Uh-huh, sure, sure. But just so you know, I’m, like, really good at reading people.”

Y/n laughed awkwardly as she looked over at the girl, “right well-” 

Wheezie suddenly grabbed the girl by the arm and began tugging her away toward the drink table. “Come on, let’s get a drink. I need to fill you in on the drama.”

Y/N, looking apologetic, glanced back over her shoulder. “Sorry,” she called, offering him a small smile. 

“It’s fine,” Rafe quickly replied, forcing a smile, even though a part of him was disappointed as he watched his sister drag the girl away, the navy fabric sewing around her legs as she got lost in the crowd of brightly coloured dresses.

It’s not fine. 

He had almost said it- almost told her how he felt, how much she meant to him. But now, the chance had passed, and the more he thought about it, the more he felt like he’d missed it. That perfect moment was gone, stolen by Wheezie’s innocent oblivion. He sighed, shaking his head, trying to push the frustration aside. He had another chance, right? He just needed to be patient. The music continued to thump in the background, and the party went on, but Rafe couldn’t shake the feeling that the one thing he wanted most had just slipped through his fingers.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Rafe lingered by the edge of the party, his gaze fixed on Y/N as she laughed and talked with Wheezie,

“You okay, man?”

Rafe was startled out of his thoughts by the voice of Topper, who had appeared beside him, a beer bottle in hand. Topper's eyes were trained on the boy's expression, clearly picking up on the tension. Rafe swallowed hard, forcing a smile.

"Yeah, yeah. Just... tired,"

he said, but even to his own ears, it sounded hollow. He cleared his throat, wanting to change the subject before Topper could press. He glanced over at the group of girls, including Y/N, who was chatting with the boys sister.

“You’ve been kind of quiet all night.”

Rafe shifted on his feet, feeling the weight of Topper’s observation. "I'm fine," he said quickly, brushing it off again. But this time, it wasn’t as convincing.

“Okay, man,” Topper said with a skeptical smile. “If you say so.” He took a long swig of his beer, then added, more casually,

“Y/n liked her necklace?”

Rafe’s breath caught, and he nodded stiffly.

“Yeah, why?”

Topper shrugged, seemingly nonchalant, but Rafe could tell he was watching him closely. The boy let out a sharp laugh, but there was no humour behind it.

Seriously?

“What's the problem.”

Topper just grinned, his tone dropping to something a little more playful but still serious. “Look Rafe, I don’t know what’s going on between you two, but you should just… say something.”

Rafe’s chest tightened at the words, like a weight had just settled on his ribs.

“What’re you talking bout Top-”

“Come on.”

Topper leaned against the nearby wall, clearly in no rush. “I’ve known you long enough to know when you're into someone. And I know how much you care about her. But don’t wait until she’s looking at someone else..”

The boys eyes drifted over to Y/n, who was now talking to Cooper, a smile on her face as she pushed her hair over her shoulder, laughing at what the boy was saying. Her hands reached out fixing his slightly bent tie, before the boy pulled her towards the floor where couples were dancing, he spun her clumsily to which she shook her head at him happily, her hands now resting on her shoulders.

“You think it’s that easy?” Rafe muttered, as his hand rubbed over his face.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The lights strung up around the club now flickered softly, casting a warm, inviting glow over the crowd. Y/N, with her head tilted back in laughter, let out a genuine chuckle as Topper dramatically reenacted a conversation from earlier in the night, his exaggerated gestures making everyone laugh even harder. Kelce was leaning against the bar, his smile wide, eyes gleaming as he added his own commentary. The girl brought her hand up wiping away at the tear in her eye, maybe she had one too many of those champagne flutes that were being walked around. A warm buzz started in her chest and radiated outward, making everything feel just a little giddier. She glanced around, half-focused on the conversation unfolding before her, the words blending together in a pleasant, almost melodic hum.

Her gaze wandered for a moment, eyes catching on Rafe. The way his smile lit up on his face, the way he looked at her, even from across the room, made her chest flutter, but in a way that felt hazy. Maybe it was the alcohol. 

Maybe it’s him?

 She wasn’t sure. But everything seemed just a little more intense, despite the slight fuzziness clouding her thoughts.

A grin tugged at Kelce's lips, and he straightened up, pulling a blunt from his blazer pocket with an almost practiced ease. He held it up casually, letting the group see it, a playful smirk dancing on his face. 

“How about a little fresh air, some space to breathe?”

His gaze lingered on Y/N for a moment, a knowing smile tugging at the corners of his mouth,

“I’m feeling like the beach is calling my name.”

Rafe, still nursing his drink, glanced at the others, his gaze drifting back to Y/N, a bit of quiet time away from the buzz of the club felt like a good idea. He met Kelce’s eyes for a second before shrugging. 

“Couldn’t hurt,” he said. Kelce, sensing he was starting to win the group over, gave a knowing nod and flicked the blunt again. 

“Exactly. So, what do you say? Beach, fresh air, good company—

“I’m down” Cooper spoke out as he stood up from his seat, Topper nodding along in agreement. Y/N hesitated for a second, but the thought of the beach, the quiet, cool night air felt tempting. She finally nodded, her lips curving into a small smile. 

“Why not?”

She glanced at the group, who were already starting to make their way toward the door, then back at her mom. She wasn’t sure how long they'd be gone, and she didn’t want to leave her mom completely unaware of her whereabouts. The girl took a deep breath and made her way back to the bar, where her mother was still chatting away with a few friends, her laughter ringing out louder than it should have.

"Hey, Mom," Y/N said, leaning in close, tapping her lightly on the shoulder.

Her mother turned toward her, blinking as if surprised to see her daughter standing there. A wide grin spread across her face, and she let out a small giggle. “Oh! Hi sweet girl," she slurred lightly, “You havin’ fun?”

Y/N smiled, already feeling that familiar warmth spreading through her at her mother’s carefree attitude. 

“Yeah, gonna head to the beach with the others... get some fresh air.”

Her mom squinted at her for a moment, still a little disoriented but clearly not at all concerned. She waved her hand dismissively, 

“Oh honey, that’s fine, go, go... fresh air is good. Go. Have fun." She paused before pulling her daughter into a quick, tight hug. Y/N squeezed her mom back, her heart a little lighter. 

“I will. Love you,” she said, stepping back. Her mom waved her off with a lazy grin, already turning back to her conversation. 

"Love you too, baby!"

Her heart clenched slightly, her mother was only ever that way when she was drunk, and she wished it was more often that she got to see her like that. The drunken version of her mom- full of giggles, playfulness and affection- was a rare sight, one that always disappeared by morning. Y/N turned and walked back toward the group, as much as she loved her mom, as much as she appreciated everything she did, there was always a part of her that wished she could hold onto this lighter version of her just a little longer, that maybe one day she could see it without the help of alcohol or the haze of exhaustion. She turned back toward the door, catching up with the group stepping outside.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

She walked a little further toward the back of the club, the sound of her footsteps soft against the path leading to the beach. Her eyes caught sight of the others already moving down the sandy shore, their figures distant in the night, laughing, talking, stumbling around, but someone was waiting for her by the edge of the club’s back entrance. Rafe leaned casually against the brick wall,

“You makin me wait, huh?” 

Rafe teased lightly, raising an eyebrow as she stopped in front of him, the faintest hint of a smile tugging at his lips. The tensions of the early evening seemed to wash away, he couldn't tell if it was from the alcohol he’d drank over the night or if it was the girls presence, she seemed to put him at ease in a way. 

Y/N smiled, feeling a little self-conscious as she glanced at him. “I had to tell mom where I was going,” she said, a slight shrug. “You know how it is.” Rafe’s smile softened just a little, his eyes flickering over her. “Yeah, I get it.”

As they stepped away from the club, the noise and lights faded behind them, leaving just the quiet hum of the ocean and the soft rustle of the wind through the trees. The beach stretched out before them, waves lapping gently at the shore. Rafe was moving ahead of her, his stride confident, hands tucked into his pockets. He glanced over his shoulder, catching sight of her slowing down a little, her heels sinking into the sand with every step. He smirked, clearly noticing the struggle, but there was a softness in his eyes that made it seem more endearing than anything else. Y/N sighed, shifting her weight to one foot as she tried to pull her heel free from the stubborn sand. 

“Great” 

She muttered under her breath, her gaze on the ground as she wiggled her foot, trying to free herself from the sinking trap. The sand wasn’t ideal, shifting beneath her with every movement, and the heels she wore weren’t exactly beach-appropriate. Rafe took a few steps back toward her, his grin wide but his expression amused. 

“Need a hand, princess?” 

He teased, the nickname slipping from his lips, she rolled her eyes but couldn’t help the small smile tugging at her lips. 

"I’ve got it," 

She said, trying to sound determined, but the truth was, the more she tried to pull her foot free, the more stuck she seemed to get. Before Y/N could respond, or even protest, Rafe’s strong arms slipped around her waist. With one swift motion, he lifted her effortlessly, pulling her off the ground and into his arms in a bridal hold.

Y/N let out a surprised hum, her breath catching at the suddenness of it. She instinctively wrapped her arms around his neck to steady herself, her heart skipping a beat as the world shifted.

That was unexpected

“What—Rafe?” she exclaimed, voice catching with a mix of shock and something else she couldn’t quite identify. The surprise was quickly replaced with a strange sense of comfort, the boy shot her a teasing grin, his arms strong around her as he held her securely,

"You didn’t think I’d leave you stranded in the sand, did you?"

Y/N blinked up at him, still a little stunned. Her voice came out slightly breathless as she muttered, 

"You better not drop me."

His smirk deepened, and without missing a beat, he glanced down at her with that same playful gleam in his eyes. 

"Drop you?" 

He repeated, as though considering it. Then, just as Y/N was about to give him a skeptical look, he slackened his grip just slightly, as though he was going to drop her entirely. Y/N’s eyes widened. 

"Rafe!" 

She squealed, her hands instinctively tightening around his neck, pulling herself toward him. The sudden shift in weight had her clinging to him tighter, her heart skipping a beat as she could feel the way he was teasing her. 

Oh my fucking go-

"Don’t you dare!"

"Gotcha,"

he laughed, lifting her back up his grip firm again as he steadied her. Rafe’s grin only deepened as she clinged onto him.

"Yeah, well, you’ve got a death grip on me now," He teased, his lips almost brushing against her ear as he spoke. "Maybe next time, I’ll actually drop you.” Y/N rolled her eyes, but the smile on her face was undeniable. 

“I’ll remember that,” she said, but the words came out softer than she meant. As the others came into view, Kelce, Cooper, and Topper all gathered in a loose circle, passing something between them, Rafe slowed his pace.

"Alright, princess," he murmured with a small, amused smile, "this is where I put you down."

How about you don't?

Where did that come from-

Y/N, still nestled in his arms, raised an eyebrow. "Oh? You mean you’re done showing off?"

Rafe's grin softened just slightly,

"Something like that."

With a small chuckle, he gently lowered her feet to the sand, his hands lingering on her waist for just a moment longer than necessary, like he didn’t quite want to let go. Y/N felt a slight chill from being on her own two feet again, but the warmth from his touch lingered. Rafe’s gaze flicked up to the group as they passed the blunt around. Kelce was the first to wave them over with a grin. 

“Took you long enough, you guys finally fuck or what?” He said, his tone light and teasing, his eyes already hazy from whatever it was they'd been smoking.

“You wish,” Y/n spoke back as she flicked her middle finger up at him. She glanced at the blunt in Kelce’s hand, 

"Thanks for sharing,"

she said, her voice casual, though there was a slight challenge in her tone as she reached out for the blunt taking it from Kelce. Holding the blunt, she exhaled a soft laugh before bringing it to her lips. She took a slow drag eyes fluttering close, feeling the familiar, slightly heady warmth settle in her chest as she held the smoke in her lungs for a second before releasing it into the night air.

Kelce grinned, watching her. "That’s what I like to see," he said with a wink, before reaching for it again.

Y/N passed it off to him, the buzz from the first drag already making her feel a little lighter. She turned her attention to Rafe, who was watching her with a slightly amused, almost thoughtful expression. His gaze that lingered just a moment too long.

“See I can handle myself,” she teased, nudging him with her shoulder as she leaned back against the sand. 

"No need to carry me around like a princess all night."

Rafe chuckled, shaking his head, but there was something almost protective in his demeanour as he shifted closer, taking a seat next to her. 

"I’ll carry you whenever I feel like it," he said with a shrug, his grin returning. "Besides, I think you secretly liked it."

Y/N rolled her eyes and she gave him a small smile. 

“Maybe. But don’t get used to it.”

The night had stretched into a lazy, hazy blur, the joint passed around clouding any coherent thoughts. The group was lost in their high now, their conversation drifting like the smoke in the air. The beach was quiet, save for the soft sound of waves crashing against the shore, and the occasional laughter that spilled from one of them, the sound of the party behind them occasionally breaking the calmness. Y/n, thoroughly buzzed from the weed and the champagne, was nestled against Rafe, her body leaning into him seeking his warmth. He was resting on his elbows, his posture relaxed, his gaze shifting between the distant shore and the girl every now and then; the sea breeze tousled his hair slightly, but he didn’t seem to mind, his usual tension gone.

The girl, on the other hand, was practically vibrating with laughter. Everything seemed funny to her- Topper’s latest comment, the random thoughts floating through her mind, even the way the sand beneath her seemed to shift with every movement she made. Her giggles were light and contagious, Rafe’s eyes flickered down at her, the corners of his mouth curving into a small smile. 

Her fingers, wobbly, were fiddling with the buttons of his shirt, moving from one to the next as though they were the most fascinating things in the world. His shirt was loose, the fabric stretching slightly as she moved her fingers, Rafe felt a light tension coil in his chest. He couldn’t quite explain it, maybe it was the way her fingers traced his shirt, or the sound of her voice when she spoke.

He didn’t pull away, though. Instead, he let her keep fidgeting with his shirt, his focus shifting back and forth between her and the sound of Kelce and Topper laughing as they waded through the waves. They had made their way to the edge of the water to cool off, their carefree chatter and occasional splashes rising over the sound of the ocean.

Y/n shifted, her fingers brushing under one of the buttons on his shirt again, causing her hand to graze his skin. The brief contact made Rafe’s breath catch slightly, and his body went rigid for a split second, though he did his best to mask it.

So warm

“Stop fidgeting with my shirt,” he said lightly, though there was no edge to his tone, just a quiet humour in his voice. The girl looked up at him then, her lips curled into a, playful smile. 

“I can’t help it,” she replied, her voice teasing, her eyes twinkling with a mix of mischief and warmth. “I’m bored…” She whined. Rafe chuckled, his gaze flicking between her and the others in the distance before he let his eyes rest back on her. 

“Bored, huh?” he repeated, leaning just a little closer, the warmth of his body mixing with hers. 

“Maybe I could entertain you...”

There was a pause, a charged silence hanging between them. Rafe’s words were a playful invitation, but his tone had shifted ever so slightly, an underlying edge of something more subtle in between them. His gaze softened as he looked down at her, his eyes lingering on her lips for just a moment before snapping back to her eyes.

Y/n didn’t seem to notice the shift, her giggles still bubbling from her chest, softening as her breath caught, fingers pausing on his shirt, her hand resting lightly against his chest for a brief second.

“Maybe you should,” she said, her voice a little dreamy. 

Her heart was racing, thoughts a little jumbled from the joint she'd kept bringing back to her lips, she cursed herself for her lack of self restraint. She could still feel the heat of Rafe’s body beside hers, his arm brushing against hers as he shifted, his eyes never left hers, and the soft amusement in his gaze now mixed with something more intense, more uncertain.

Don't do it-

But what's the harm?

Her fingers trailed up to the top of his shirt, her eyes looking at the black bowtie done up under his neck, her finger looped around the material loosening slightly, watching as it falls around his neck. Her teeth bite at her bottom lip as she pops open his top button, trailing down to the next two opening up the material, his skin now exposed to the cool sea air, her breath hitched but she didn’t pull away. Instead, she leaned in just a little, her lips barely grazing the skin of his jaw. The move was slow, almost hesitant, but it was enough to make Rafe’s eyes narrow just slightly. He seemed to hold his breath for a moment, as if he was waiting for her to make the next move.

His hand, without thinking, shifted a little closer to her. His fingers brushed lightly against her side, a soft touch that sent a jolt through her. As she pulled away from his jaw slightly, her breath shallow, Rafe could see the flush spreading across her cheeks. Her lips were slightly parted, her pupils dilated, the hint of glassiness in her eyes betraying the effects of the drug. The subtle tremor in her fingers as she rested them on his chest didn't go unnoticed, and neither did the way her gaze wavered—she was there, but not entirely there.

Rafe’s heart pounded in his chest as he watched her, the air between them thick with an electric tension. She seemed so close, so present- but at the same time, there was a layer of fog surrounding her that made him pause. The way she looked at him, her eyes soft but unfocused, her body language so open and trusting… it created an urge within him, something that made him want to pull her in. 

But the longer he looked at the girl, he came to terms with what was going on and his stomach tightened slightly. This wasn't right.

She's high you gotta stop 

It wasn’t that he didn’t want her, God, he wanted her more than he could put into words—but in that moment, he saw the vulnerability in her that he hadn't before. The haze in her eyes, the way she was almost floating in her own thoughts, disconnected from the world around her. He could see the haze in her expression, the slight confusion, the softness in her gaze that wasn’t entirely hers. She wasn’t fully present. She wasn’t fully aware of what was going on, not the way he needed her to be.

His hand hovered at her waist, but he didn’t pull her closer now. He couldn’t. He was aware- too aware of what this moment would mean if he crossed that line without her consciousness.

He wasn’t that guy. He never would be.

Her fingers brushed his chest again, but this time, he didn’t respond the way he normally would. His eyes took in the way she looked up at him, her breath still shallow, the lightness in her smile tugging at his heart.

He exhaled, fighting the urge to pull her in, his heart beating louder with every passing second. She deserved more than this, she deserved clarity, not confusion. He could already see the trust in her eyes, an unspoken invitation in the way she looked at him, but it wasn’t real- not in the way it should be.

“Y/N,” 

Rafe said quietly, his voice steady but with a hint of concern. He reached up, his hand brushing her hair away from her face as his thumb gently stroked her cheek. 

“Don’t think this is a good time princess” His words were soft, but they held a weight. She blinked slowly, her expression still dreamy, and for a moment, Rafe couldn’t tell if she’d even heard him. But her lips parted, her eyes narrowing slightly as if trying to focus.

“Why not Rafey,” she mumbled, words slower than usual, the lack of clarity in her voice made his chest at her vulnerability. 

So fucking stubborn

He could feel the tension building again, the desperate longing inside him clawing at his chest. He wanted to kiss her. He wanted to pull her into him and lose himself in her. But something inside him, a voice that was louder than his impulses, told him to stop. He was starting to realise why she only smoked when he was around, he didn’t want to imaginer like this, so innocent and trusting at a party by herself, surrounded by people she didn’t know. 

The thought made him nauseous.

He leaned back, his gaze holding hers, steady, but with an edge of hesitation.

“Not like this,” he said softly, almost to himself, but loud enough for her to hear. She tilted her head in confusion, her lips pursing as if trying to understand, but Rafe shook his head slightly. He could wait. He could wait until she was fully aware, he wouldn’t take advantage of her- he couldn’t- he'd never even think of it.

“Y/N, look at me,”

he whispered, reaching out gently to hold her face, his thumb grazing her soft skin. “I’m not going anywhere. But I’m not doing this with you like this.”

For a moment, there was only the sound of the waves and the distant laughter of the others in the background, and then, finally, she nodded, her expression soft, a slight pout tugging at her lips. She was still out of it, but she understood the sincerity in his voice, and it made something flutter in his chest.

With a sigh, Rafe pulled back just slightly, releasing his hold on her but keeping his gaze on her face, his heart still hammering in his chest. She didn’t say anything more instead she leaned into him ever so slightly, head resting on his shoulder, just enough to let him know she wasn’t pulling away, but she was still there, still trusting him.

And that was all he needed.

The boy took in a slow breath, then dropped his hand back to his side. He could feel the pull, the heat, the temptation to kiss her, but he resisted, allowing the silence to settle between them. 

She's won't remember any of this. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As Rafe pulled outside the girls house, the soft hum of the engine and Y/n’s occasional delayed mumble of the song lyrics playing were the only sound between them, the night air seemed thicker now, charged with something unspoken. The glow of the streetlights flickered over the girl's face, catching the soft curve of her jaw, the faint flush still lingering on her cheeks. He had barely said a word to her since the conversation on the beach, unsure of what to say, his mind still buzzing from the way things had shifted and he knew she hadn't noticed, too preoccupied in her own little world.

He's got a nice nose

You know what they say about big noses-

Girl shut the fuck up

The car slowed to a stop in front of her house, but neither of them moved immediately. He kept his hands firmly on the wheel, trying to calm the sudden pressure that had started to coil in his chest. Every little shift of her body, every soft breath she took, seemed emphasise in the silence between them. Y/N didn’t seem in any hurry to get out, her fingers fiddling with the slit of her dress as she looked out the window, exposing her thigh to the air of the car. She leaned just a little closer,

“Thanks for bringing me back,”

she said softly, her voice sweet and laced with a quiet giggle that clung to the walls of the car. He nodded, his throat tight, trying to keep his composure. 

“Of course. You okay?” 

He asked, though he noticed the way her fingers were now tracing the fabric of his seat, the way her gaze lingered on him a little too long. She turned to face him, her lips pulling into a playful, almost mischievous smile. 

“Yeah, I’m good,” she said, her voice insistent, as if she were trying to convince herself. She leaned toward him just slightly, her shoulder brushing against his arm as she shifted closer. Rafe felt the heat rising in his body, a surge of something he was desperately trying to control. She was still so touchy, so close. Her hand, which had been absentmindedly resting on her lap, now slid to his arm, her fingers lightly brushing his shirt, making his pulse hitch.

The light touch sent a spark through him, one that made him clench his jaw. He had to remind himself that she wasn’t fully in control of her actions, but it didn’t make it any easier. His muscles tensed as her fingers lingered for just a second too long on his forearm before slowly tracing up his sleeve. The soft caress sent an undeniable shiver through him, one that made it harder to concentrate.

He swallowed hard, his grip on the steering wheel tightening as her fingers trailed up to his shoulder, her palm resting against the side of his neck. It was too much—too much of her, too much softness in her touch, too much of the way she was looking at him like she wanted more. Her gaze, still slightly unfocused, held a curiosity, a gentleness that was intoxicating. She pushed herself slightly closer to him over the centre console, her dress dragging down slightly, the v-neck exposing her skin to him, the low cut revealing more of her chest than he was expecting.

"Rafe..." Her voice was barely a whisper now, like she was testing his name on her lips, her fingers now slowly sliding over the side of his neck, her touch sending goosebumps across his skin. His jaw locked, his teeth grinding together as he fought the growing desire inside him. 

“Y/N, stop,” he said through clenched teeth, his voice low and strained, but firm. He turned his head toward her, his gaze intense, trying to pull her back into reality. 

“Need to go home yeah? You’re not yourself right now.”

Don't wanna go home want you

She didn’t seem to hear him- or maybe she didn’t care, he couldn't tell. Her hand slid around to the back of his neck, her fingers brushing the nape of his hair, it almost made his resolve crumble. He forced himself to meet her gaze, but his heart was hammering in his chest, and he was so aware of the way her body was leaning closer, the heat radiating off her.

She smiled up at him, leaning in, her lips brushing against his neck in a soft, teasing kiss. “You’re so serious all the time,” she murmured, her breath warm against his skin.

“Why can’t you just relax?”

His whole body stiffened. His grip on the wheel tightened so much his knuckles went white. He tried to focus on anything but the way her lips lingered near his neck, the way her breath caressed his skin, how close she was.

“Y/N, you need to get out of the car,” he said, his voice strained, the words slipping out before he could stop them. 

“Go inside, I’m not going to do this with you, not when you’re not yourself.”

She pouted, her gaze flickering down to his lips and back up to his eyes. “You’re no fun...” she said with a playful giggle.

Rafe let out a long, slow breath, he didn’t want to hurt her feelings,

“C’mon princess” he said quietly, his tone more affectionate, yet still firm. 

“Go inside for me, yeah? You’re not thinking clearly.”

She didn’t resist. 

After a long beat, she finally pulled her hand away, glossy eyes looking at him as she pushed open the door. Before she stepped out, she turned back to look at him one last time, her smile still lingering but faint; she pushed herself back into the car and placed a soft kiss onto his cheek.

“Goodnight, Rafey.”

She whispered, her voice wavering and slightly off-balance. She wiggled her fingers at him in a wave before closing the door behind her, and Rafe watched as she staggered up to her front door, her steps a little less steady than usual. She fiddled with the doorhandle, and he debated whether he should get out and help her open the door. Somehow she managed to crack the door open, she turned back to him blowing him a kiss before closing the door behind her. 

Once she was inside, Rafe sat there for a moment, his jaw still clenched, trying to shake the weight of everything that had just happened. Her touch had been too much and as much as he had tried to keep his distance, it didn’t matter because his body was betraying him.

He shifted uncomfortably in the seat, feeling the tightness of his slacks against him, and he swore under his breath. The pressure between his legs was undeniable, a constant reminder of how wrong it all was.

She's high.

AND she's not herself. 

He dragged his hand through his hair again, frustration gnawing at him. He had to leave. But the thoughts came anyway- the image of her lips, the soft weight of her body against his, the way her smile made his chest tighten. He could feel the pressure building again, the ache in his body, and for a split second, he imagined what it would be like to pull her back into the car, to kiss her until she forgot everything except him. To hear her moan his name, to feel her hands on him the way they were on his neck...

Rafe’s breath hitched.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The boy's hands gripped the wheel tighter as he rolled into the driveway of Tannyhill, the tires crunching over the gravel as he parked the car in front of the empty house. The quiet of the night surrounded him, only the distant hum of a few streetlights and the rustling of leaves in the breeze breaking the stillness.

He sat in his car for a moment, head resting against the steering wheel eyes closed and jaw clenched tight as he tried to push away the memory and the feeling of her touch. He felt guilty, but he also couldn't shake the feeling of wanting more. His body was still trembling as he remembered the way she'd touched him, the way she'd looked up at him with hazy, glazed eyes. He shifted awkwardly in his seat, slacks straining against him. 

A glimpse of pink catches the corner of his eye, Rafe’s gaze lingered on the pink jumper in the backseat, the soft fabric wrinkled from weeks of being tossed around in the car, yet it still carried the faint scent of her. His heart thudded in his chest, and he couldn’t help the surge of desire that bloomed inside him. The memory of her wearing it, her figure draped in the soft jumper, rushed back with vivid clarity.

He reached over slowly, almost as if he was afraid it would disappear if he moved too quickly. His fingers brushed against the fabric, and the sensation sent a small shiver down his spine. Grabbing the jumper, he lifted it from the backseat, holding it in his hands like it was something precious. The soft material felt almost too delicate against his skin, his breath caught in his throat as his mind wandered. He could almost feel her body against his again, the way her soft hands had pressed into him.

He let out a shaky breath, the air in the car feeling warmer than it had moments ago. His fingers traced the edge of the sleeve, the softness reminding him of the girl. Rafe’s grip on the jumper tightened, and his chest rose with a slow, deep breath as he brought the soft fabric up to his face. The scent of her hit him again- intoxicating and something uniquely Y/n that made his stomach flip. His eyes fluttered shut as he inhaled, the softness of the material pressing against his nose, his lips. The familiar scent settled deep inside him, and he couldn’t stop the grunt that slipped out, low and unguarded, his head tilted back against the seat.

His mind swirled with visions of her, of what could have happened, of how easily he could have pulled her back into the car; the heat between them had been undeniable- much too strong to ignore. 

He could feel the burn in his chest, the low, insistent throb heavy between his legs. 

Rafe’s jaw clenched as he pulled the jumper closer to his face again, breathing her in deeply, letting her scent consume him. His hand drifted down his body, fingers fiddling with his belt as he loosened it, the rattling of the metal buckle filling the car. 

He lifted his hips up slightly, shaking hand slipping his trousers down past his hips just enough. His breath was harsh and ragged, his body burning, the feeling of her scent surrounding him; the memory of her touch still fresh in his mind, making him twitch with want, he groaned aloud as he wrapped the jumper around his hand, needing to feel the softness against him.

The jumper was wrapped around his hand in a tight, desperate grip as he moved it down to his crotch, palming himself slowly through the fabric, the friction making his breath come out in quick, uneven huffs.

He let out a low, moan his voice thick with need, but it wasn't enough, it wasn't what he really wanted. 

In a hurried movement, he slid his hand inside his briefs, grasping his length, and began to stroke himself, eyes closed as he let out a guttural groan, his head falling back against the seat as his body responded to the touch of his hand and the soft material wrapped around it.

He imagined the girl in the passenger seat, her eyes heavy-lidded with desire, her lips parted in anticipation as she was moments before he’d told her to leave. 

He swallowed harshly as he circled the tip of his throbbing cock, beads of pre-cum coating his thumb.

His mind flickered back to the golf course weeks ago, the girl on her knees in front of him, innocent doe eyes looking up. He pictured the night going differently, his sweet best-friend leaning over, her lips wrapping around the head of his cock, her tongue swirling and teasing his tip, cheeks hollowing around him. He let out a heavy breath at the image of the girl in his mind, his hand gripping himself tighter. He imagined his hands threading through her hair, pulling it up into a ponytail as her eyes fluttered shut, pushing his hips towards her, the girls nails dragging down his thighs as she gagged around him. Her whimpers and whines echoing in his mind, his hand, still holding the jumper trembled slightly as he pressed it harder against his face, as he thrusted himself up into his fist at the smell of her. Rafe's strokes grew faster, his breath coming out in short gasps, his hips bucking up into his hand frantically as he envisioned the girl pulling away from him, eyes teary and glazed over like they were tonight, looking up to him her mouth open for him awaiting, lips reddened and wet with her spit. 

“Fuck y/n” he groaned shakily as the slick sounds filling the car came to a stop, warm ropes of cum landing over the soft pink material wrapped around his hand.

Rafe's heavy breaths filled the car, windows now fogged up. The boy sat there motionless looking down at the mess in his lap, mind reeling.

What the fu-

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

taglist: @evermorx89 @bellaed1t @user381953 @lovemanheim @loves0phelia @yourcrackleflame @kundaquarius @matthewswifeyy @pillowprincess4him

[bows4tyun]

ENLIGHTEN ME - ! ⸝⸝ 강태현

୨ৎ: ""I'm a virgin, not a virgin loser, there's a difference, dumbass." taehyun spat out harshly and scoffed, "I can't believe you thought so low of me, but it's cute of you to think I was a virgin loser like you." he faked a smile, angering you a bit. of course he had to be the smart ass one. "

𓍼 paring! - knowledgeable virgin!taehyun x virgin!reader (f)

𓍼 warnings! - roomates to ?, mean dom!taehyun (he's extra mean!), sub!reader, they kinda hate each other, taehyun basically teaches reader how to fuck, groping, nipple play, oral (m. receiving), cum consumption, unprotected sex, slut shaming, taehyun calls reader a slut (and bitch but only once)

𓍼 lexi adds! - as the winner of the poll, here is knowledgeable virgin tyun!!! this came out a lot longer than i thought and I couldn't help but make tyun an extra mean dom!

if someone had told you that your roommate, taehyun was a virgin, you wouldn't have believed them.

he was the last person on earth that you'd think of as a virgin, but apparently you thought wrong. it wasn't until his best friend, beomgyu had told you the truth that you were in for a treat.

taehyun had invited beomgyu over without telling you, meaning you had come back from work and had a mini heart attack when you saw beomgyu's sleeping form sprawled on the small living room couch.

"taehyun!" you yelled, your voice echoing through the hall of your shared apartment.

you thought he wasn't home until you saw the upper half of his body pop out from his room, "hm?" his tone innocent as his cold yet cute boba eyes stared at your angered form.

"what is he doing here?" you questioned, your voice loud as you turn your gaze to beomgyu, not caring of waking him up from his beauty sleep.

"would you quiet it down? you'll wake him up." he spoke back sternly. you look back at taehyun, and when you do you notice something, he's shirtless.

you feel the blood rush to your cheeks as they warm up and you cover your eyes with your hands, "put some clothes on!" you say, trying to hide the very evident blush on your face.

"what's the big deal? never seen a man shirtless before? grow up." his words come out as almost teasing yet harsh and you scoff.

"I have seen a man shirtless, I just don't want to see you shirtless." the blush on your face was practically gone with the way you were talking back to him.

"what are you trying to imply, huh?" taehyun spoke as he approached you, still shirtless, a shirt in hand.

before taehyun could get too close to you, your life is saved by beomgyu, "hey taehyun, get this motor mouth out of here, im trying to sleep." beomgyu's voice sounded as tired and sleepy as he looked, his hair disheveled from all the tossing and turning.

"you heard him, get." and with that, taehyun points a finger toward the door of your room, insinuating for you to basically get lost.

"I hate you..." you mumbled under your breath as you clenched the strap of your bag tightly and stormed off to your room as told.

"the feeling's mutual, sweetie." beomgyu laughs at taehyun's response, giving him a small "good one" before adjusting his position and getting ready to fall back asleep.

you're caught off guard by the pet name he had called you and you stop in your tracks, turning your head only to an angle where you can see he back of his head, "don't ever call me that again." you threaten. and with that, the door of your bedroom is slammed shut behind you.

⸝⸝

the following day is your day off, meaning you could relax from all the hard work you had put in throughout the week.

starting off your morning slowly, sleeping a few more hours than usual until you're finally completely awake that you get a text from beomgyu:

"your yelling yesterday made me sleep really good,thanks for not kicking me out :)"

with a scoff you reply:

"don't ever scare me like that ever again, give me a heads up next time!"

to your surprise, he's quick to respond:

"okok... wanna know something funny about taehyun? you won't believe it!"

you want to respond with a "no" but curiosity gets the best of you:

"what?" "he's a virgin!" "seriously?" "yeah! can you believe it?" "not really... " "oh c'mon! it's not that unbelievable!"

with that, you don't text him back. was taehyun really a virgin? maybe beomgyu was playing a prank on you. it kind of was a bit hard to believe considering the way he acts around you, all cold and hard headed. maybe you'd ask him about it.

you were enjoying your morning bowl of cereal before taehyun walks in, his hair a mess from not brushing it out as he scratches the back of his neck lazily in his plain white tee and loose fitting pajama pants.

"is that seriously what you're having for breakfast?" he asks with attitude, sitting down with his elbows resting on the kitchen counter.

you nod, chewing your food calmly "yeah, want some?"

despite your somewhat kind offer, his response is full of disgust. "no , there's absolutely no protein in that whatsoever."

you reply back with a scoff, "does it really matter that much? you're so difficult..." you take another bite and taehyun stares at you for a few seconds, his lip twitching as if he were going to smile but stopped himself.

"oh! taehyun, I have something to ask you." you say after swallowing the last bite of your breakfast and your eyes meet with his.

he nods his head nonchalantly, "what's up?"

you're a bit nervous to ask but you anyways, "are you a virgin?"

silence.

his eyes widen and his lips part, shock evident on his face. he's speechless. after a few more silent seconds, he speaks up, "who told you that?"

"beomgyu"

"what an asshole." he saids in anger " who does he think he is to tell everyone my secrets? "

you laugh nervously "secrets? so you mean it's true? you're a virgin? a loser?"

I'm a virgin, not a virgin loser, there's a difference, dumbass." taehyun spat out harshly and scoffed, "I can't believe you thought so low of me, but it's cute of you to think I was a virgin loser like you." he faked a smile, angering you a bit. of course he had to be the smart ass one. "you act as if you're not a virgin too, except, you are a virgin loser." he argued back like his life depended on it.

and you're just as shocked as he was, if not more. "who the hell told you that?" you questioned him angrily, wanting to know the truth.

taehyun lets out a villainous chuckled to your reaction, "no one. I just had a lucky guess. but now I know that my lucky guess was right, you are a virgin loser."

There's a faint pink hue of blush is spreads across your face from both anger and embarrassment "what's the difference?" your tone of voice was loud as you shouted but taehyun didn't even flinch.

"the difference is that I know about sex, you on the other hand have probably never seen a dick before, am I right?" he was right, very right infact.

"stop talking about it!" you spoke, frustrated at how you couldn't get back at taehyun.

"calm down, sweetie" he cooed, tilting his head and smirking at the stressed look on your face, his dimple evident. "wanna help each other out?"

⸝⸝

that's how you ended up here, straddling taehyun, his hands on each of your hips as he stared into your eyes coldly.

being in such and intimate position like this with him made you nervous as you spoke, "d-do you have a condom...?"

he shrugged, "what do you think? would a virgin have condoms?"

you look down, noticing the bulge that at had grown in his pants. heat rises to your face again and you shake your head.

"exactly." he speaks with such bluntness it scares you a bit. "now stop asking dumb questions and get your clothes off."

you obey not wanting to anger him more than he already seemed. he always seemed to be in a bad mood. slowly one by one, you took a piece of your clothes off. it wasn't until you were only in your undergarments that taehyun ripped them off your body, causing you to yelp. "could you be any slower? you're making me not want to take your virginity, this is my first time too, y'know. "

you felt so weird, naked in front of him. he looked at your body as if it were nothing. he definitely didn't act like the virgin he claimed to be.

without saying anything, his pulled his white tee off his body, letting you get a better view of his shirtless form.

you couldn't deny that taehyun was attractive, but seeing him like this made him even more attractive.

"quit staring, will you? don't make this weird." soon, he pulled down his pants enough for his cock to spring out, hitting his lower stom ach with a small slap. you back up a bit, his big and thick dick enough to scare you away. how on earth were you supposed to fit that monster inside of you? "why do you look so scared, hm? it's just a dick." he said nonchalantly. just a dick? was he serious?

You take a deep breath, he was right. it wasn't something to be afraid of, this was an experience almost every person on earth had, nothing new. "okay, how do I do this?"

taehyun doesn't talk, instead he guides you hips closer to his, lifting you with ease just enough for you to hover over his dick, your hands on his shoulders as you feel the ghostly touch of his thick tip lining against your tight hole.

"ready? I'll be waiting to decide if I want to be rough or gentle." he says and you nod.

you feel the burn of his thick dick stretching you out, drawing and high pitched moan out of you as your eyes screw themselves shut and your brow furrow.

taehyun lets out a soft yet low groan at the warm feeling of your gummy walls enveloping him oh so tightly. he felt like he could cum right on the spot.

you felt like you were in heaven, his dick felt so snug inside of you, his veins rubbing against your insides, and his tip brushing against your cervix lightly.

"you okay?" he spoke, his tone softer than usual and what you expected.

you mumble a small "yeah" and his lifts your hips up, half of his cock pulled out of his hole before slamming your hips down against his roughly, emmiting a loud yelp from you, "taehyun!"

taehyun only smacks your ass with a lot of force, leaving the stinging sensation to linger on your ass cheek before he does it a for a second time. "shut up, when did I ever say you could speak? greedy sluts stay quiet." his voice sounds the complete opposite of what it sounded like a few seconds ago, his demeanour changing completely.

again and again he continues to lift and slam your hips down on his cock, not giving you the right time to adjust. he gropes your ass roughly as he guides your body down up and down his shaft in a rhythmic pace.

you felt like you were going to explode from pleasure. how can anyone's first time be this good?

you were already fucked so dumb on his cock and he had barely even started. h e threw his head back, his bobbing adam's apple visible from the new angle.

suddenly, you felt the strong urge to release, your first ever orgasm. you gripped taehyun's shoulders tightly, your hole doing the same with his dick, clenching around him as if it were your last day on earth. "taehyun -! I'm going to cum! ah-!"

he groaned at the feeling, smacking your ass even harder than last time, causing you to launch forward, your head resting on your shoulder as he continued his relentless and merciless thrusts.

"I said to fucking shut up! I don't want to say it again, bitch." he spat out his words like fire and you felt his hand leave your ass and start griping your breasts, squeezing the soft flesh and tweaking your sensitive nipples, leaving you to fuck yourself on his cock.

pathetic whimpers escaped past your lips, trying to keep quiet as you were told, yet it was so hard to do when his cock was hitting the right bundle of nerves over and over again.

with a smack on your ass and a loud moan of his name, you came undone on his cock, squirming at the feeling as you pant heavily.

taehyun pulls out, drawing a whine from you and he smacks your ass. he begins to stroke himself throwing his head back.

he looks at you with lustful eyes and grabs a handful of your hair, "suck." he commands, bringing your head down to the level of his cock. it's glistening with your juices and you take it into your mouth, barely able to fit it because of his girth.

you begin to suck and it doesn't take long for you to feel his warm and sticky cum shoot to the back of your throat. you look up at him with your mouth full of his cum, he's all sweaty, his bangs sticking to his forehead as he pants to catch his breath.

"swallow." he says inbetween pants and your mouth leaves his dick with a pop. when you smile you wipe your chin with the back of your hand, collecting the excess juices that had dripped down.

you sit up on your knees, both of you guys staring at each other from across the room.

taehyun is the one who decides to beeak the silence

"this may or may not mean we're dating."

𓍼 taglist! - @hyunj00 (please lmk if you want to be added to my taglist!!)

reblogs are appreciated!

[paragonrobits]

honestly this whole thing being treated as an exclusive problem to superhero tropes in general, or implying that superheroes as a concept are inherently bad because I guess people assume they were specifically created to Keep The People Down or what-not, REALLY ANNOYS ME A LOT so this seems a good opportunity to make a point:

this trope is not specific to superheroes, and has been a thing for quite a while in fiction overall, specifically in TV and films (and at the risk of being snappy and letting irritation doing the talking, thus in mediums that get the most coverage and it makes people sound like a series doesn't exist if its not in TV or movies)

At its worst, this is basically a low-effort way to give a villain some nuance without putting much thought into it. It's not really meant to imply, at least in most cases, that their goal or motive is BAD, as some people seem to suggest. This is probably an outgrowth of the common idea of a villain being the hero of their own story; its common to suggest that a villain MUST have some kind of moral point or heroic quality to them, and that's basically where this comes up; its a less well-written handling of that concept by using it to get some pathos into a villain that can often be counterproductive.

I'm gonna go out on a limb here and suggest that its not suggesting that their cause is BAD; indeed, the writer implicitly means that their cause is good, because that's where the villains Good Cause Points come from; if it wasn't a good cause to them, they wouldn't be trying to humanize the villain by rooting them in that cause.

It's not exclusive to superheroes by any means, and the general trend predates the modern superhero genre in film and television, at least in the post-MCU sense.

The other point to be made is that sometimes, the supervillain isn't actually concerned by a problem at all, and they're just using it as an excuse to satisfy their own personal grudges, because it gets them support as they pursue their own goals, or because they're cynical manipulators who never gave a damn about that problem but it furthers their own goals to manipulate others who DO care about that problem.

There is also one other aspect; sometimes the villain does genuinely believe in solving a problem, but their understanding of it is completely divorced from reality, or their intended plans are inherently a bad thing. For example, lets take the common idea of Poison Ivy as a heroic eco-heroine fighting corporations who pollute the planet. All well and good, but Ivy actually doing that is an extreme outlier in her established character. More often than not, what she's actually doing it is causing massive destruction that gets a lot of completely unrelated people killed because her explicit end goal is the complete genocide of all human life, and at extremes, all ANIMAL life as well. This makes her a textbook ecofascist of the 'kill all people, especially the ones that have no power to do anything about ecological destruction' kind.

This is closer to the sort of villains you're actually likely to see; their stance on a problem is completely destructive, counterproductive and generally just kind of evil. Thats why heroes stop them; because their entire plan is to kill lots of people while making vague comments about 'x thing is the Real Evil' or something like that.

This, uh, also tends to be the actual nature of villains that fandoms often present as enlightened True Heroes unjustly antagonized by heroes. Almost every time, they only give lip service to any real goal and mostly just want to kill lots of people or do large scale disasters to satisfy their own grudges, and as such they're not really meant to be taken seriously.

And from another point of view, its like this: the reason we don't usually see the hero solving that problem is because that's not the focus of those sort of stories. If you're going in for an adventure story about someone with fantastical powers have action-filled showdowns with larger-than-life antagonists, its not really reasonable to expect it to suddenly swerve into a political treatsie about sociological phenomenon just because the villain of the week makes some vague references to societal ills as they start kicking orphans into a giant blender to fuel their giant robot that's going to burrow to the core of the earth and blow it up.

Its a fairly basic writing bit to give a villain some apparent nuance without having to do much more, and that's basically it. And to follow the metaphor, I don't think its really reasonable to give a go-ahead to the sort of person who kicks orphans into blenders just because they make some vague references to a greater good and then never follow up on it. As a villain, their only real purpose is to be an entertaining roadblock, rather than 'a hero but kinda edgy' as the term seems to become around some fandoms.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Can we have Azul being very excited to see his parents again with random dorm members questioning if thats the same Azul that's their dorm leader?

Octavinelle A-kun? Octavinelle A-kun. (Context: Octa A/Kon is my Octavinelle mob student OC asdblasdiabis)

Family means Nobody is Left Behind or Forgotten.

Azul had reserved a slot of time early in the afternoon--before the Mostro Lounge's usual hours of operation--for his parents.

As soon as he swung open the doors, his painstaking efforts were made apparent. Every corner of the eatery had been scrubbed, buffed, dusted, mopped, and vacuumed to perfection. Their best china was out, a vase of freshly cut flowers and romantic candlelight marking the table he had saved. The live band he had hired (no expense spared) welcomed the Ashengrotto family with a soft, jazzy melody.

The music came with a chorus of clapping. Several Octavinelle students stood in lines, giving applause to the VIPs.

Azul ushered his parents inside. "Please, come in, come in! Right this way, esteemed sir and madam," he crooned, gesturing for them to follow him.

They settled into their seats and were immediately provided with menus and tall glasses of water, the ice so clear and free of impurities that one could see right through them. Octa A--Kon--their server, hastily pulled his hand back after delivering the items and bowed. How smoothly everything ran, like an orchestra with a skilled conductor.

"So this is what you've been up to at school," Mr. Ashengrotto murmured, a faint smile tugging at his lips. "I must say, it's impressive. Not every 17-year old would be capable of overseeing an entire cafe on top of studying and juggling the responsibilities of a dorm leader--well, perhaps your mother would."

"You really do take after me," Mrs. Ashengrotto laughed, "in more ways than I suspected you did."

"Fufufu. Yes, well... I did learn from the best." Azul straightened, lifting his chin proudly. "As it so happens, I also run a little... side business, shall we say. My peers come to me with their owes, and I do what I can to help alleviate those."

"If only your grandmother could have joined us... I'm sure she would be pleased to hear of your charity work. Perhaps we could pay her a visit on your next trip home."

His stepfather raised his brows. "Seems I've married into a multitalented family."

"Please do not talk down your own abilities. You're quite skilled in your own right, dear stepfather!" Azul wrung his hands together. "Why, I can only hope to match your legal prowess one day!"

“Haha, you’re a sweet talker too. Alright, I’ll take your professional advice. No more talk of business though—let’s decide what to eat.”

“Fufufu, as you wish.”

Kon warily kept his distance, a step or two farther from the table than he usually would. Staring, listening--it was strange, he decided. Never had he heard his dorm leader speaking with such sincerity, with kindness that wasn't laced with hidden ill intent.

Is this... Azul-senpai? He seems a little different around his family. Softer... squisher somehow.

"Pick anything you like off the menu. I'm confident that you will enjoy our dishes, made fresh every day with the best sourced, in-season ingredients possible.” Azul pushed up his glasses with one hand. “If you care for a recommendation, the fried chicken is sublime. It took us a while experimenting with spices to achieve its flavor and texture, but I believe those efforts paid off wonderfully."

“Fried chicken, your old favorite! You hardly touch it anymore.”

“M-Mama…! Er, I mean mother,” Azul quickly corrected himself. “That was back then! Now I am making a conscious effort to mind my health. I ask that you respect that."

“Alright, alright. Point taken.” Mrs. Ashengrotto tapped a finger on her menu. “I’ll take the fried chicken platter appetizer, for old time’s sake. We can split it so you can treat yourself too, dear."

"Oh no, I couldn't possibly..."

"One bite can't hurt," his stepfather urged. "Here, let's get a salad as well to balance it out."

"Th-That is not how nutritional intake works at all..." Azul sighed, a hand to his head. There was a pause, then he flagged Kon over. "... You heard them, correct? One fried chicken platter and the garden salad appetizers to start."

"We'll get those out for you right away," he said robotically. A line, rehearsed. "Take however long you need to decide your mains."

The mob student turned to scurry away and pass along the order to the kitchen. A voice stopped him dead in his tracks.

“And Kon-san?”

He looked back.

His dorm leader had his legs crossed, looking very authoritative as he sat up straight in his booth. He, the lackey, trembling before the boss.

“Y-Yes, sir?” Kon squeaked.

Azul simply smiled. "Thank you for your service."

The breath he had been unconsciously holding slipped out as a sigh. And he tried to smile back.

"Anytime, dorm leader.”

[hoodreader]

𝒯𝐻𝐸 𝑀𝐼𝒮𝒪𝒢𝒴𝒩𝒴 𝒪𝐹 𝒜𝒮𝒯𝑅𝒪𝐿𝒪𝒢𝒴

misogyny, the dislike, contempt for, or ingrained prejudice against women. misogyny is a complex societal system + means of gender-based oppression. with the rise of incel podcasts consisting of men sitting at a table and inciting violence against women, i wanted to make this post kinda observing how misogyny manifests in astrology.

astrology vocabulary + related words

hatred ♂, contempt ♄ ♇

women ( generally )♀ ☽ ♋︎

the conditions of women ( mundane ) 7h

prejudice ( generally ) ♄

ingrained prejudice 3h

oppression ♄

patriarchy ♄ ♆

aid for sudanese women, congolese women, palestinian women, first nation / american indigenous women, trans women, sex workers, and sexual health / wellness + pads / tampons

since men are the beneficiaries of patriarchy, it best serves ‘ manhood ’ as a concept to be misogynistic. many of these misogynistic acts are so deeply ingrained in cultural expressions of manhood, there is effectively no man who is not misogynistic at all; however, i’m speaking about men who are violent to women and those who enable violence toward women. which. . . to be honest. . . is probably like ninety % of men. so clock that. ( lol )

anyways. . . here are some things i noticed.

mars in the chart of a man represents his sense of manhood and what affirms it. and a man’s relationship to his manhood will tell u everything about how he feels about women.

an overactive mars ( stelliums in aries or scorpio, mars in the first or tenth, mars aspecting the asc or chart ruler, mars aspecting the north node, etc. . . ) will almost cause them to exert too much energy into trying to affirm said manhood. this leads to competitiveness ( especially with women. every overactive mars native i know has more beef w women than men ). let it be known that mars rejoices in the sixth house - the sixth house is the house of unappreciated labor / services, of hierarchies, etc. . . overactive mars men may genuinely believe women to be in service of them or posited below them.

i also see a similar think with weak or afflicted mars ( mars in cancer, taurus, or libra, mars in the malefic houses, combust mars, mars aspecting the south node, etc. . . ) there’s almost a resentment towards women bc of their own internalized insecurities ( as if women made patriarchy and told men to subscribe to it lol )

moon and venus will be the planets responsible for how a man regards women. moon in scorpio, aries, capricorn. . . moon-mars, venus in aries, scorpio, or virgo. . . moon or venus aspecting the nodes. . . combust moon or venus. . . moon-pluto, venus-pluto. . . this creates a discomfort with women and / or femininity. it can be something learned from childhood in respect to the moon due to the moon being the mother. venus is harmony, not just women - those with afflicted venuses can struggle to feel harmonic.

i also feel like solar men have pretty fragile egos, and that’s because the way men’s egos are stroked are empty. to stroke anyone’s ego is a fruitless endeavor, because it only feeds a bottomless pit, but men’s egos are largely attributed to society / structural conventions of gender and manhood. it’s an oppressive performance. and well. . . ' artists ' be sensitive about they shit.

an example of a man who is known for misogyny while having some of these placements is andr3w t4te - he has a combust moon in sagittarius as well as venus in scorpio conjunct pluto.

moving on now. . . i would say that in the charts of women, all of the points i said above essentially apply to them as well. but it’s unique because obviously, patriarchy doesn’t function the same for women as it does for men. i would say women with most of the above placements would possibly have a higher likelihood to experience misogyny - a harsh aspect between saturn or pluto and venus or moon. . . mars in the first or tenth house usually has people projecting some sort of ‘ aggressive ’ character onto u, whereas men can exhibit the same amount of passion and not be vilified.

so women with prominent ‘ masculine ’ planets ( sun, saturn, mars, or jupiter but especially the first three ) i notice experience so much outward contempt from men. the way patriarchy works is that all women are subjected to it and no woman is exempt, but there’s levels to patriarchal violence. and women with strengthened masculine planets get vilified for expressing said qualities.

solar women are vilified for being bold, expressive, wanting attention, wanting to lead. because no, as a woman, ur role is to follow or orbit around the man ( as the moon does ). u do not have the positionality to be the center of our solar system. scarcely seen and never heard

martian women are vilified for being passionate, driven, active, aggressive. because no, as a woman, ur role is to be soft and welcoming. u are to comply, serve, and obey

saturnian women are vilified for being autonomous, hermits, quiet, dominant. because no, as a woman u need to desire family. desire community ( with men ). pursue likability

jovial women are vilified for being wise, thoughtful, philosophical. because no, as a woman u are to not think. ur opinions are dumb and ur role as a woman is to never speak. never have a hope or dream or aspiration outside of beauty, love, sex, and children

women who deviate from these set structures are often subject to the most cruelty, so i’d also add prominent uranus women - especially if uranus relates to venus or moon, as this gives the woman a ‘ unique ’ expression of her womanhood. . .

i think women with lilith prominent ( and honorary mention, lilith in eighth or twelfth ) also are subject to so much misogyny. that whole story of lilith threatens manhood, especially because in the west, the natural order is supposedly determined by god. these women tend to have tremendous life lessons pertaining to women and womanhood, where they experience exile, rage, and then empowerment. this also goes for nodal women esp if ur nodal in vedic jyotish.

as for internalized misogyny. . . there is a deep-rooted shame ( saturn ) within a woman who feeds the man in her head instead of starving him out. i think. . . venus / moon harsh aspecting saturn, maybe? combust saturn? i think lilith women also may have to learn how to think of themselves as people and not accessories to men, to not regret autonomy for the sake of not feeling lonely.

a lot of benefic / strong moon and venus women can have a tendency to cling too much to patriarchy as well, because they can feel validated by it. lunarians priding themselves on being nurturing. venutians priding themselves on beauty or sex appeal - i feel like women gotta seek a lil touch of the malefics to balance that out. . . be okay with not being perfect, sexy, beautiful, or nurturing. be okay with not wanting to be motherly, not wanting to have children, not wanting to marry.

this internalized misogyny idea is more of a work in progress so bear with me, lmao, but the venus persona chart and moon persona chart will also reveal the native’s deeper rooted qualities of the respective planets. saturn will show any shames associated with womanhood.

i will close this ramble by saying that astrology is a rather patriarchal study, lmao. and it’s not implicit at all. i think if u have even a rudimentary understanding of feminism, u could see that astrology - a profession once dominated and determined by men - has fundamentally misogynistic principles. even things such as the planets representing women ( moon & venus ) respectively give insight into what it is thought a woman can provide - children, family, beauty, home, sex, relationships, nurturing, and love. but with the planets representing men are varied in quality and such - they can be prideful, they can be aggressive, they can be slow, they can be wise, they can be creative, they can be sexual, and so on.

the way moon and venus tells what is implicitly thought to be the “ right kind of woman. ” and respectively, mars and saturn particularly tell how to be a man. if u have a capricorn moon, for example, u fail the womanly obligation of nurturing.

or. . . how the moon represents change + movement. . . how the moon phases between visibility and invisibility, but saturn represents constants. things that are transgenerational. saturn is legacy - the wife takes his surname, the children take his surname, and sometimes? they have his first name too, lmao.

the father is viewed as foundational and it reminds me of that silly quote regarding ethnic identity: “ u are what ur father is. ” as if ur not 50/50 both parents! that��s how easily the mother / moon is erased, despite actually being more visible than the father / saturn, more proximate to us ( as the moon orbits earth ). even tho the mother is usually doing most of the work: whether it’s childbirth / labor, or simply remembering shit like their child’s favorite color, the mother usually does the most work.

how the sun ( the planet responsible for ur personality ) is also the planet read for fathers and husbands - like men are deeply integral to ur sense of personhood. the assumption a woman would even seek, desire, or pursue a husband.

maybe even the fact that both planets representing women must be benefic. if women are benefic, then a woman’s nature is kind, helpful, easy. and if she is anything other than benefic. . . she’s not merely bad, but a bad woman. i even find it telling that in mundane astrology, the seventh represents women - and why is that? why isn’t the first house ( the house of self ) representative of women? why is it the house of other? is it because the etymology of woman is “ wife (to) man ”? a bit on the nose to decide that women would then be seventh house ruled then, hm? i could ramble on and on, lol. but hopefully i drove my point home!

anyways. that’s my astrological ramble on misogyny. ok. bye.

[jessicaloons]

INVISIBLE STRING: FROM THE VAULT

Part 3: A Christmassy story…

Masterlist

Merry Christmas everyone 🎄🎅🏻♥️

Better late than never! As it is during Christmas, it all gets a little hectic and what I wanted to post last night had to be postponed to today… it’s a little something I started to write a year ago, at Christmas, while watching one of my all time favourite Christmas movies.

And now no more talking, here it is…

Christmas 2027:

"Radiation?" Joris cocked an eyebrow.

"Radiation." I shrugged my shoulders and he chuckled "Don’t ask. It’s- it’s her newest ick…"

"You’re surrounded by radiation the entire day with having your phone with you? So where’s the difference at ni-…"

"That’s exactly the point. Your body is exposed to radiation all day long, so at night, when it resets, there shouldn’t be any radiation!" Lizzie’s voice rang out behind us, making Joris flinch "I’ve read it in various magazines! So it can’t be that wrong!"

I had to chuckle, looking at Joris’ petrified face when Lizzie glared at me, although I could see her eyes getting watery.

"It’s not funny!" her voice strained.

"It’s not, cara mia. You’re right. I’m sorry." I replied.

"I’m not crazy…" she sniffled a little and I felt bad.

"No, you’re not! I know that, okay?" I said immediately and got up from my seat, cupping her cheek and gently stroked the side of her bump "You’re doing everything to protect our babies… so whatever you think is best we’ll do! You’re an amazing mum, okay?"

She only nodded slightly and turned away, her shoulders slumped.

"I lay down for a bit…" she whispered and waddled off, taking a short look into Emmie’s room, before she continued to our bedroom.

"I swear I didn’t want to upset her!" Joris looked at me with big eyes and I sighed, sitting back down.

"Believe me, same. The last 2 or 3 days it’s been tough, she’s more emotional than usually…" I rubbed my temples, leaning back "One moment she’s happy and bubbly, the next moment she cries about how there’s only one apple left and that it might feel alone… and then she’s mad at herself for crying about such ridiculous things which makes her cry even more because she thinks I’m annoyed of her being an emotional mess… which is not true at all. I love it. I swear."

"You’re probably the only guy on earth who loves his pregnant wife’s mood swings." Joris laughed.

"It’s cute… when she’s this bubbly Lizzie, who turns over a jar she can’t open first super frustrated and then grumpy like never seen before and curses it like there’s no tomorrow, just to be sad the next moment that whatever’s in the jar is lost forever…"

"And then you chime in and save the day…" he wiggled with his eyebrows and I held up my hands.

"You know, not all heroes wear capes… but they still get a proper thank you… if you know what I mean…"

"Yeah. No. Gross…"

Right when I wanted to reply I heard the soft steps of Emmie and Arlo approaching and when I turned a little I saw them both walk around the corner.

"Dada? Mummy look sad?" her sweet little voice sounded truly concerned and I opened my arms, hoisting her up into my lap "Why mummy sad?"

"She’s not sad, Emmie. Just a little emotional."

"Emonal?" she repeated and I smiled.

"Emotional…" I said slowly, while she quietly said the word again "That’s when you feel all sorts of emotions… that’s feelings. Sad, happy, tired, funny, moody… and you just don’t know what’s the real feeling. So you get a little overwhelmed with emotions… it’s nothing bad. It happens. Especially when someone carries a baby, or like mummy two, in their belly…"

"Mummy feel for baby one and baby two?" Emmies eyes widened and I had to chuckle.

"Yes, my little princess, that’s exactly what mummy’s feeling. Her feelings and baby one and twos feelings."

"Lot of feelings!"

"Oh yes! A lot of feelings!" I nodded and she sighed, cuddling into my chest "You know what? Why don’t you help me and Joris make some hot chocolate for mummy?"

Emmie’s eyes lit up and she jumped off my lap, already pulling me up on my feet before she grabbed onto Joris hand, doing the same.

"Comes on, Jojo! Hot chotlat for mummy!" she chirped and pulled him with her.

"I’m coming, Emmie-bug." he laughed and picked her up, following me into the kitchen, where he sat her down on the kitchen island.

"Emmie hot chotlat, too!" she looked first at me and then at Joris with her big puppy eyes and I could melt away on the spot.

"Let’s make hot chocolate for us all, okay? And then we can watch a movie before bedtime, how does that sound?"

"No bedtime."

"Emmie, we have to get up early tomorrow! We’re leaving for Christmas!" I reminded her but she shook her head.

"No bedtime." she repeated, crossing her arms in front of her chest.

"No bedtime means no Christmas, and no Christmas means no pops and grams, no granny, no Liam or Elijah… no Arthi!"

"No Arthi?" Emmie whispered and I nodded.

"Also no presents…"

"Emmie like bedtime."

"Yeah?" I asked and she nodded.

"Bedtime comfy. Jojo read story?" she turned and looked at him "Pwease?"

"Of course, Emmie-bug. Every story you want!" he cooed at her and she clapped happily.

"Now chotlat for mummy!"

"Now chocolate for mummy."

"Charles?" Lizzie whispered and I turned a little, trying to make her out in the dark "I’m sorry…"

"What do you mean?" I asked, voice still hoarse from sleeping. I looked around, my eyes trying to adjust to the darkness and saw her perched against the headboard.

"For being over emotional… and unreasonable…" she said and I sat up to switch on the lamp on the night stand.

"Hey, you’re not over emotional or unreasonable!" I replied, rubbing my eyes, facing her.

"I am. The other day I cried because of a pair of socks I had to throw away since one of them had holes…"

"It was a nice pair of socks!"

"Charles…" Lizzie chuckled and I grabbed her hand, kissing her knuckles "I’m serious! I feel like I’m way worse than when I was pregnant with Emmie!"

"Yeah of course! You’re carrying twins, cara mia! Double the trouble!"

"Is that why I could eat all the damn time? I’m always hungry…" she sighed and I laughed, looking at her pouting.

"And what does my pretty girl want right now?"

"Now? Oh… umm… I’m not hungry…" she looked away and I gently grabbed her chin, turning her head.

"Lizzie… I know you… it’s 1 am that’s your time… so, what can I get for you?" I stifled a yawn.

"I’m fine… you’re tired and we’ll be picked up early…" she mumbled but I shook my head.

"Pretty girl…" I scooted closer, cupping her cheek "What do you want? Fruits? Something salty? Ice cream? A burger?"

"Some sour gums and-… it’s weird, because usually I don’t like them… salt and vinegar crisps? Do we have that?"

"On it…" I pecked her lips and shuffled out of the bed, stretching as soon as I stood up "Anything else?"

"Umm… one of these strawberry lemonades maybe?"

"Anything my pretty girl wants." I said, grabbing my sweatpants that got stuck somehow and I pulled harder almost tripping over when I finally freed it.

"Are you okay?" Lizzie looked at me and I nodded.

"It got stuck somehow… I don’t know… get comfy I’ll be right back." I slipped on my pants and left our bedroom, down the hall to the kitchen I stopped at Emmie’s bedroom and took a look inside.

Our little girl tucked in under her blankets, Arlo guarding her, sleeping right in front of her bed. He must’ve felt my presence, lifting his head looking at me. He got up, yawned and then trotted over, tilting his head.

"All good, Arlo. Just me." I whispered, kneeling down "Go watch our little princess." I stroked his fluffy fur, scratched his ears before he stretched “Ohhh big stretch! Good boy." I scratched his ears and got up "Go back to sleep…" he turned around and walked away, plopping down back at his old spot.

I rummaged through the pantry, grabbing everything Lizzie graved and trotted back to our bedroom, where a big smile spread over her face as soon as she saw me walk in.

"I can already taste the lemonade…" she made grabby hands and I laughed, handing her the can of lemonade and the crisps and sour gums.

I climbed in bed next to her, lying down and watching how she happily scrunched up her nose as soon as she ate the first sour gum, closing her eyes savouring the taste.

"Remind me to pack strawberry lemonade, salt and vinegar crisps and sour patch kids…" I yawned.

"I’m so excited for Christmas, our last without the twins… next year we’re already a family of 6…" Lizzie whispered and I cocked an eyebrow.

"6?"

"6…"

"Of course… Arlo…"

"I told you he’s our first born." Lizzie’s happy giggling made me smile and I nodded.

"You’re right. He is. And he’s an amazing big brother, guarding his little sister."

"He’s a good boy." she happily munched and I smiled, yawning again "You can sleep… you don’t have to stay awake with me…"

"Yeah?" I mumbled, fighting to keep my eyes open.

"Yeah…" Lizzie replied and leaned down, kissing my cheek "Thank you…"

"You need anything else?" I asked but she shook her head.

"No. We’re all good now. Sleep, pretty boy."

I didn’t know if I replied or not, I fell asleep almost immediately.

Ring. Ring. Ring.

An annoying ringing inside my head. But was it inside my head? I groaned and turned around, Lizzie next to me fast asleep, the ringing that definitely wasn’t just inside my head didn’t seem to bother her.

"Dada… make it stop…" Emmie rubbed her eyes, stumbling to our bed, her hair her a hot mess "Head owie!"

"I know…" I picked her up and sat her next to Lizzie "I’ll go…" I kissed her cheek and scrambled out of bed, looking for the source of the horrific sound. The door bell. And the landline phone. Both ringing at the same time. Just like my phone "What the hell?" I grabbed my phone and picked up "Hello?"

"Ah, Mr. Leclerc! Finally! I wanted to come up myself and look if everything is alright!" Matthieu, our concierge, said and the landline phone and door bell stopped ringing.

"Of course, everything’s alright? Why wouldn’t it be?" I was confused, looking around.

"There are two cars here to pick you up. They’ve been waiting for a while now and we tried to call you then-…"

"What?! But the cars should be here at 8?" I replied.

"Mr. Leclerc, it’s 8:30 am…"

"WHAT? What? How? I- what?" I checked the time at my phone and cursed "Oh shit… umm tell the drivers we’ll need a moment…"

"Can I send them up to get your bags?" Matthieu asked and I nodded.

"Yes. Everything is packed. All the bags are at the elevator…" I hastily walked back into our bedroom, pushing the buttons to open up the blinds.

"Alright. I’ll tell them." he hung up and I gently shook Lizzie.

"Cara mia? Wake up please… we need to get ready…"

"Hmm?" she mumbled, blinking a few times.

"The cars are already here… we need to get ready." I said again and her eyes shot open.

"What? But you set your alarm? What?" she scrambled up looking at Emmie next to her "Did we oversleep?"

"I don’t know. I didn’t hear the alarm. But that doesn’t matter. We need to get ready. Now. Come on." I pulled her gently off the bed and she sighed "I take care of Emmie, okay?"

"Hmm…" Lizzie mumbled and waddled away to the bathroom, yawning "Did you not set the alarm?"

"I did. I don’t know what happened…" I mumbled and picked up Emmie "Come on girlie, let’s get ready."

"Ready for Crimas!" she clapped her hands and I chuckled.

"Christmas. And no. Not quite yet. We have to get there first."

"To Christ-as?" she tried again.

"Almost, Christmas, with an 'm'… Christ- mas."

"Christ-mas." she repeated and I smiled.

"You got it right, Emmie! Good girl!" I sat her down on her bed and grabbed the clothes Lizzie had put out already "Now let’s get dressed and then we’ll have a little snack in the car, how does that sound?"

"Car?" she tilted her head, scrunching her nose.

"Yeah, we have to drive to the airport. And then we get into the jet to fly to Switzerland. To this big chalet in the mountains where all our family is waiting! To celebrate-…"

"Christmas!" she clapped excitedly and I nodded.

"Exactly! But we’re a little late. So we need to hurry up a little!"

"Houwy up! Houwy up!"

"That we have to! So let’s have a look. You look adorable, now we just need to take care of your hair and-…" I began when I saw Lizzie waddling towards the kitchen, still in her pyjamas "Alright… wait a minute…" I sat her down "You pack your sleep plushies into your backpack and play a little with Arlo, okay? I’ll be right back and make your hair." Emmie nodded and I followed Lizzie into the kitchen, finding her rummaging through the fridge "Lizzie?"

"Why is there no food?" she sniffled, turning around "I’m hungry. But there is nothing to eat. What am I supposed to do now?"

"Cara mia, we have breakfast in the jet, okay? It’s all prepared-…"

"But I’m hungry now!" she was grumpy "The babies and I are hungry now!"

"I understand, but we have nothing here, because we’re leaving now… we can stop at a bakery on the way?" I tried it again and she sighed.

"Okay… I go and take a shower…" she walked past me and I followed her.

"Cara mia, you don’t need to shower. We don’t have time. You can shower as soon as we arrive in the chalet…" I said carefully but she shook her head.

"I smell… I’m not arriving smelly for Christmas…"

"Technically it’s not Christmas yet, so… and also you don’t smell… you just had a bath last night and I can still smell your coconut butter on your skin, so please. Just get dressed and let’s go. The cars are waiting. For over half an hour now…"

"Then why didn’t you set the alarm?" she looked at me annoyed.

"I did! I don’t know why it didn’t went off! Stupid alarm clock…" I walked over to my night stand to find the alarm clock to be off, not plugged into the wall "What the… oh no… my sweatpants… fuck…" I mumbled, remembering the struggle I had at night with my pants "With my phone this wouldn’t have happen…" I groaned more to myself when a half naked Lizzie stepped out of the closet.

"What did you say?" she cocked an eyebrow and I held my hands up "Is it my fault now for protecting our babies? Last night you said I was the best mum because of it!" her bottom lip began to wobble and I hastily pulled her into me.

"And I meant it! Okay? It’s all good. Just-… please get ready. I feel bad for the drivers to wait this long because of me… and the jet and everything…" I whispered against the side of her head, kissing her temple.

"Okay. I’m almost done…" she breathed out "You need to get dressed yourself…"

"On it…"

15 minutes later I strapped Emmie into her seat and gave the driver the all clear to drive, although I had a feeling like we forgot something at home. I was nervously fidgeting with my phone next to Lizzie who happily munched on the croissant I got her from the bakery.

"What is it?" she asked after another minute of me nervously tapping my foot.

"I feel like we forgot something…" I mumbled, going over the list inside my head "I just don’t know what…"

"It can’t be important if you don’t remember it."

"I don’t know…" I looked outside the window, the car approaching the little private airport.

We had all of the bags, there was nothing left when we left the penthouse. I checked Emmie’s backpack and she had packed all her night plushies. Arlo laid on the floor in front of me, his bag with his toys and leashes in the back. Lizzie packer her bag with her books and computer last night herself and it rested now next to her on the seat. The bag with her snacks on the floor next to my feet. I couldn’t grasp what was missing but still I felt like it.

"Charles?" Lizzie grabbed my hand, squeezing it "We’ve got everything. It’s fine, you’ll see…"

"Yeah… I hope so…" I mumbled watching the car in front with our baggage stopping on the tarmac "It’s too late now anyways I guess…" I unbuckled Emmie and got out of the car, taking her with me. I helped Lizzie out of the car and she took Emmie from me, walking with Arlo towards the jet while I helped loading our baggage onto the cart, before I walked up the stairs of the jet myself.

"Welcome on board, Mr. Leclerc." the pilot shook my hand and I smiled.

"Thank you, and sorry for the delay… it got a little hectic this morning…"

"All good, Sir. Why don’t you take a seat and we’re preparing for take off."

"Thank you." I took off my jacket, handing it to the flight attendant who stored it away.

"Can I get you anything to drink?" she smiled and I shook my head, sitting down on front off Lizzie, Emmie next to her on the seat, looking outside the window.

I leaned my head back. Closing my eyes. One last time going over the list in my head. One last time going over every piece of baggage we just unloaded from the car. Lizzie’s suitcases, my suitcases, Emmie’s suitcases, the bags full off her and Arlo’s toys, the bags full of presents. The bag with Lizzie’s snacks and last but not least the 2 suitcases and backpack of…

"JORIS!" I shouted, Lizzie and Emmie both looking at me "WE FORGOT JORIS!" I took my phone out, about to call him when he already did the same.

"Jo-…"

"I can’t believe you forgot me at home…"

"I swear-…"

"Like seriously? What is this? Home alone? Your alarm doesn’t go off and you forget me in all the hectic?"

"I’m so sorry! I send the ca-…"

"Just be glad it’s more like Home Alone 2. I woke up by myself and-…" he hung up "And got in the car right in time… I just wanted to wait how long it would take you to figure out that I wasn’t with you…" Joris walked inside the jet, plopping down in the seat next to us.

"I’m so so sorry!" I looked at him sheepishly and Emmie climbed off her seat, walking over to Joris who picked her up, sitting her down in his lap.

"Jojo made Emmie hair look nice." she smiled and I looked at her, then at him.

"What?" I said and looked at Lizzie "I thought you did that?"

"I thought you did?" she replied and Joris laughed.

"Nope, I did, right Emmie bug?" he cooed at her and she smiled "And now that we’re all here… I say let’s go. Christmas is just right around the corner…"

"Christmas with pesents! Pesents for evyone!" Emmie said excited, clapping her hands "Mewwy Christmas evyone!"

🎄🎅🏻♥️🎄🎅🏻♥️🎄🎅🏻♥️🎄🎅🏻♥️🎄🎅🏻♥️🎄

I hope you enjoyed this (not so) little something and I hope you all had amazing Holidays!

Taglist: (If you don’t like to be tagged for this, let me know)

@itsjustkhaos @eugene-emt-roe @sunny44 @silkenthusiasts @glitterquadricorn @aundercover @kakorrhaphiphobia @alittlebitofbooksandmagic @ru-kru @shimmermotorsport @janeh22 @kahhorri @18754389 @chiliwhore @hellowgoodbye @queensassybitchsworld @harrysdimple05 @skynel09 @fangirlforever2000



[euthymiya]

acting like you’re some woke person just because you advocate for middle aged women to be lifeless on the internet is not the flex you think it is 💀

You seem rather passionate about this so I’m going to indulge your ask to let you know three things:

Writing is a hobby that gets better with age, life experience, and practice. The best pieces of writing objectively come from older people and I’m not talking about fanfiction. I mean books and literature. I’m serious—go look at some of the most well known pieces of literature and then search up the ages of their authors during the years they were published. You’ll find the older writers tend to bust out bangers and this principle is very much applicable to fics too by default. Also writing fanfic is not “lifeless” lol. Some of you act like writing fanfic is juvenile compared to a novel and it’s rly not that different from writing an original piece of fiction. Sure, sometimes fanfic can be a little less on the conventional side in terms of technique. But genuinely the concept of putting characters into situations to create a plot is literally the main thing on both sides here and if you think writing fanfic is silly, it makes 0 sense to hold creative writing to some pedestal. Some fanfic writers demonstrate AMAZING original world building skills especially if they write au’s that diverge from canon and I think you are out of your mind if you think this hobby is not oftentimes an impressive one rather than “lifeless”

Being 30+ doesn’t automatically mean you must/do have a family and kids but I’ll still indulge that point and say you can easily balance a work and personal life while also having a hobby. I know middle aged men who dedicate more time to hobbies like hunting and fishing than middle aged women do with writing. One actually requires you to leave your house and family behind and the other you can do from the comfort of your home and tend to your family should you need to. I think the nature of your opinion only stems from a misogynistic view on aging women but that’s another can of worms

People don’t stop consuming and enjoying things as soon as they hit their third decade of living. If that’s your viewpoint on life, you’re going to set yourself up for a very miserable time once you hit 30. If you’re already 30+ then you’re a hypocrite by default by even being here in the first place lol. Also, life is literally so fucking silly okay? You wake up, work, pay taxes, and try to get by with what is usually an underpaid paycheck. Just fucking enjoy your life and let others enjoy theirs okay? If a 30 year old likes anime, then that is literally so god damn harmless I cannot stress enough how unimportant that is. There are 30 year olds out there doing heinous things in their free time and you choose to be bothered by someone who happens to produce an assortment of words from time to time. Please reevaluate your priorities

All things aside I cannot convince you that being 30+ and enjoying fandom and fanfic is not weird unless you really just realize that it’s not weird. Idk how old you are but I assume you’re younger than 30 because no 30 year old would be on fandom tumblr and then bash others for it. But regardless, just because you think something is weird doesn’t mean it’s bad. It is literally the most harmless thing I do not understand why you would care so much, just move on???? When you think someone dresses weird in real life do you go point it out to them??? No you think it to yourself and move tf on—and if you would voice it to them then you are literally a rude individual. Plain and simple. Rude and disrespectful and I would suggest you again, reevaluate. And it’s the same principle here. You just move on. If you seriously cannot be convinced that this is normal and just absolutely are dead set on believing that 30+ year olds who enjoy fandom are weird, fine. But just keep it to yourself it is the bare minimum you can do to be a decent person I cannot stress this enough to you

And one more thing. The people who are writing the mangas and animes you enjoy so much are middle aged. Older than 30/40. Grown people who might even have families and kids. Creativity has no age limit it is just a small joy that people indulge in at any age and it’s a very nice thing when they share it for others to enjoy, as well. Please just enjoy someone’s art and live a little. I promise you will be much happier and peaceful if you just read a good fic without worrying about the age of whoever produced it. I guarantee you a lot of the BEST fics you’ll read will come from the older writers they are literally doing you a favor if you happen to enjoy reading fanfic. Why bite the hand that feeds you?

[lacydollette]

BLESSING IN DISGUISE — CHAPTER SEVEN

PAIRING lovely kook!reader (x rafe) x sarah cameron

WARNING(S) flashbacks, reader being confused about her feelings, sarah giving advice, slight fluff, explicit language, chocking, nightmares

SUMMARY torn between your resurfaced feelings for rafe and the attraction towards jj you can’t seem to find peace. so when Sarah notices your unusual quietness she can’t hold back anymore and convinces you to tell her everything.

“This,” Sarah said, taking a sip of her wine and pointing toward the sunset, “is exactly what I needed. No drama, no chaos. Just us, the ocean, and wine. Perfect.” You leaned back on one of the deck chairs of your little yacht, sunglasses perched on your nose. Sarah stretched out beside you, her blonde hair catching the light as she adjusted her bikini strap and sighed satisfied.

You smiled, letting yourself relax into the moment. It had been a while since you felt this kind of peace. Between the chaos of your own feelings, fights, and everything else, a girls’ day with Sarah felt like a breath of fresh air. But as the hours passed, the silence between you began to shift. You could feel Sarah’s gaze flicking to you now and then, her usual easygoing nature replaced with curiosity.

Finally, she sat up, setting her glass down with a soft clink. “Okay,” she said, her voice cutting through the calm atmosphere, “spill.” You turned to her, raising an eyebrow. “What are you talking about?” Yet you knew exactly what she was referring to.

She hesitated, biting her lip, “The argument with Rafe at the bonfire. What the hell happened? I mean, I know Rafe can be… Rafe, but that was different. There’s something going on, and don’t even try to deny it.” You sighed, leaning back in your chair and pulling off your sunglasses. “Sarah—”

“Don’t ‘Sarah’ me,” she interrupted, her tone firm. “I’m your best friend. I can tell when something’s up. And this thing with Rafe? It’s definitely a thing. So spill.”

You hesitated, mind racing. It wasn’t that you didn’t trust Sarah—you trusted her more than anybody. But saying it out loud, admitting everything, was coming to the conclusion that the whole thing was real, and that you’d have to deal with it. “Look,” Sarah said softly, scooting closer to you. “I get it. Whatever it is, it’s complicated. But I’m not here to judge. I’m here because I care about you. And I know my brother can be..a dick. So please, just tell me.”

Her words finally got to you, and you exhaled shakily, setting your glass aside. “Fine,” you murmured. “But you’re right—it’s complicated. Really complicated.” Sarah nodded, her expression encouraging, and you began.

“It started at Midsummers,” you said, your voice quiet. “There was this fight—Rafe and I. I don’t even remember what sparked it exactly, but things got heated. He said some things, I said some things…and then later I wanted to clear my head and took a walk, that’s when I came across Nate.” Sarah’s brows furrowed. “Nate? As in Nate Thompson?”

You nodded, a chill running down your spine at the memory. “Yeah. At first, I thought he was just trying to be friendly, you know? But then…he wasn’t. He wouldn’t take no for an answer, and I didn’t know how to get away.” Sarah’s hand shot out to grab yours, her grip tight. “What did he do?” she asked, her voice trembling with anger.

“He cornered me,” you admitted, your throat tightening. “And I was scared, Sarah. I didn’t know what to do. So in the last second I texted Rafe…and he showed up.” Sarah’s eyes widened, and she leaned closer. “What happened?”

“He pulled Nate off me,” you said, the memory flashing vividly in your mind. “And when Nate wouldn’t back down, Rafe…” You swallowed hard. “Rafe beat the shit out of him. I mean, really went after him. I had to yell at him to stop before he went too far.” Sarah let out a slow breath, her grip on your hand loosening slightly. “That’s..fuck. That’s horrible. Is this why he’s been so on edge?” she muttered.

You nodded. “After that, things got…weird between us. There was this tension—like, we were both trying to pretend it wasn’t, but it was there. And then he started pulling away. He got colder, more distant. I tried to talk to him, but it was like he’d put up this wall, and I couldn’t break through.”

“And then the bonfire,” Sarah said, piecing it together. “Yeah,” you said, running a hand through your hair. “I saw him standing there, and I couldn’t just ignore him anymore. I tried to talk to him, but he shut me out—again. And when I brought up everything that’s happened, he threw it back in my face. He even accused me of…of messing around with JJ, when it’s clearly not his business.”

Sarah’s jaw dropped. “Rafe said that?” You nodded, feeling the sting of his words all over again. “He was so angry, Sarah. And I was angry, too. It turned into this whole thing, and then JJ got involved, and…yeah. You saw how that ended.”

Sarah didn’t respond, just offered you some simple comfort which you appreciated more than anything. You looked down at your hands, unable to meet her eyes. “I don’t know what to do,” you admitted. “I keep telling myself I should walk away, that he’s too much. But then I think about everything he’s done—how he’s tried to protect me, even when it hurts. And I just…I can’t let go.”

Then, out of nowhere, Sarah turned to you, her voice cutting through the quietness. “Do you still love him?”

The question hit you like a punch to the guts. Your mouth opened, but no words came out. You glanced away, suddenly finding the wine glass in your hand much more interesting than the intensity in her eyes. “Do you?” she pressed, leaning forward slightly.

You sighed, setting the glass down and running a hand through your hair. “I…I don’t know, Sarah,” you admitted, though the hesitation in your voice betrayed you.

Her expression softened, but only slightly. “You do,” she said quietly, her words not a question but a statement. “You still love him. Even after everything.” You didn’t respond, and that silence said more than words ever could. Sarah shook her head, letting out a dry laugh. “God, you’re both so hopeless,” she said, though her tone held a trace of affection beneath the exasperation. “He’s put you through hell, you know that, right?”

“I know.. Believe me, I know.” you whispered, your voice heavy with emotion. “And yet, here you are,” she continued, gesturing between the two of you. “Sitting on this yacht, tearing yourself apart over him. And I know him, too. Rafe’s probably doing the same thing right now, in his own messed-up way.” You looked up at her, surprised by her understanding. “You think he…?”

“Loves you?” Sarah interrupted. “Yeah, I do. As much as he’s capable of loving anyone, at least. But that doesn’t mean he’s good for you, or that this whole back-and-forth is healthy for either of you.”

She paused, studying you closely. “And what about jj?” she added, her voice softer now. “I’ve seen the way he looks at you, the way you’ve been spending more time with him. It’s like he’s your safe place when everything else feels like it’s falling apart.”

You bit your lip, the weight of her words sinking in. She wasn’t wrong. JJ had been a constant presence in your life these past few weeks—funny, kind, and steady in a way that Rafe never was. But as much as you cared for him, your heart felt tangled up in something far more complicated.

Sarah reached out, taking your hand in hers again. “You need to make a decision,” she said gently but firmly. “This thing with Rafe and JJ? It’s not fair to either of them, or to you. You have to figure out what you want, and who you want to be with.” You swallowed hard, the weight of her advice settling heavily on your shoulders. “What if I make the wrong choice?” you asked, your voice barely above a whisper.

Sarah squeezed your hand, her expression softening. “There’s no ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ choice here,” she said. “There’s just what feels right for you. But you need to figure it out, because dragging this out is only going to hurt everyone involved.”

You nodded slowly, the truth of her words sinking in. “Thanks, Sarah,” you said, your voice quiet but sincere. “Of course,” she replied, giving you a small, reassuring smile. “And no matter what happens, I’ve got your back. Always.”

As the yacht gently rocked beneath you, you leaned back into your chair, staring out at the endless ocean. For the first time in weeks, you felt like you were starting to see things clearly. Now all you had to do was make up your mind.

“Come on,” Rafe whispered, his grin infectious as he grabbed your hand and pulled you away from tannyhill. “Let’s get out of here before my dad ropes us into some lecture about responsibility.”

You followed him, laughing as the two of you sprinted past the yard and down towards the beach, leaving behind the faint hum of the party. The adrenaline of sneaking away had both of you giggling like little kids.

Eventually, you stopped in a neighbor’s backyard, Rafe doubling over and panting like he’d just finished a marathon. “Out of shape already, Cameron?” you teased, leaning against a fence and crossing your arms. “What are you, an old man?”

He looked up, still catching his breath, and gave you a glare. “You wanna say that again, smartass?” You smirked, tilting your head. “Oh, I’m sorry. Should I fetch your cane, Grandpa?” Rafe straightened up, a mischievous glint in his eye.

But before he could reply, the sudden flicker of a porch light snapped you both to attention. The faint murmur of voices drifted through the air, and without thinking, Rafe grabbed your wrist and pulled you behind a small garden cabin. “Shit,” he whispered, his voice low and hurried as the two of you pressed up against the wooden wall.

Your heart pounded in your chest, not from fear, but from the electric tension that crackled between you. Rafe’s body was close—too close. You could feel the heat radiating off him, the sweet scent of his cologne mixed with the faint smell of tequila. His hand was still on your wrist, his grip firm but not rough. “Nice move, genius,” you whispered, your lips inches from his ear. “Now we’re stuck.”

“Shh,” he hissed, turning his head toward you. His face was so close that you could see the faint freckles dusting his nose, the way his blue eyes glistened even in the dim light. “I’m just saying,” you murmured, your tone playful despite the situation. “Maybe next time we sneak off, you pick a better spot for a pit stop.”

He rolled his eyes but didn’t pull away. If anything, he leaned in closer, his chest brushing against yours as he peered around the corner to check if the coast was clear. The porch light still on, but the voices were moving farther away. “We’re fine,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper. But neither of you moved.

The air between you grew heavier, the space shrinking until it felt like there was nothing left but the two of you. You could feel the rise and fall of his breath, the faint tremble in his hands as they hovered near your sides. “Rafe, I—“ you mumbled, your voice softer now, uncertain. He looked down at you, his eyes searching yours. And then, before you could say anything else, he leaned in and kissed you.

It wasn’t rushed or harsh, but it wasn’t gentle either. His lips were warm and firm against yours, his hands finding their way to your waist as though they belonged there. The world fell away, the faint hum of the party, the glow of the porch light, the thrill of sneaking away—it all disappeared.

For those few moments, there was only him.

When he finally pulled back, his forehead resting against yours, both of you were breathless. “Well,” he murmured, his voice low and teasing, “that definitely shut you up.” You couldn’t help but laugh softly, your heart still racing.

But just as the sweetness lingered, something shifted.

Rafe’s gentle, playful expression began to change. His warm blue eyes darkened, clouded with something sharp and unrecognizable. His soft hands, the ones that had held your waist so carefully, moved to your throat, his fingers curling tightly around your neck.

“R-Rafe,” you gasped, your voice barely a whisper. The world around you darkened. His grip tightened, his once familiar touch now terrifying, cutting off your airflow.

His face loomed closer, but it wasn’t the Rafe you’d kissed behind the garden cabin. His features twisted with anger, his lips curling into something cruel, exactly like the last night you had seen each other before you left. “You think you can leave me?” he hissed, his voice sharp and menacing.

Your chest burned as you struggled, your hands clawing at his wrist, desperate for air. The world a big blur, and just when you thought you’d pass out, it all shattered. You woke with panic in your bones, gasping for breath, your chest heaving. The darkness of the room pressed down on you, but it was real, you were fine.

Turning your head, you found Sarah lying peacefully beside you, her blonde hair splayed out over the pillow, her soft breaths steady and calm. The sight of her brought you back to reality, the terror of the dream slowly fading away. You pressed a trembling hand to your throat, reassuring yourself that there was no hand there, no pressure cutting off your air. It was just a dream.

Just a dream.

LINKS .ᐟ series’ masterlist

LTAGS .ᐟ @gibson-g1rl @glitterybombshell @beausling @rafescokewhore @rafeysbunny @rafesweetie @rafeslacy @rafesangelita @rafey-baby @starkeysprincess @starzify @drewspinkbunny @whinyangel @nativegirltapes @littlelamy @lizziesangel @httpsdrewstarkey @cherrygirlfriend @lilithblackkk @maybankslover

[youre-ackermine]

Happy Holidays from your Secret Santa @theysangastheyslew 🧑‍🎄

This is my gift to you for the Levihan Secret Santa Exchange hosted by @levihanweek ❄️

This fic is set a few weeks after Belated Birthday Hope you'll like it!

Characters: Levi Ackerman x Hange Zoë, Erwin Smith

Content: Modern AU / Established relationship (they're engaged your honor) / Tooth rotting Fluff / Non-binary AFAB Hange / Swearwords

Wordcount: 6.4k approx.

A/N: English is not my usual language / Huge shout-out to my proof reader Terra @dont-f-with-moogles Thank you for your help & constant support! ilysm ❤️

Hange stopped abruptly in front of a small shop filled with colorful treats and festive pastries. They squinted at the display window before turning to Levi with a grin.

“What now, Four-Eyes?” he asked with a scowl, trying to force back the irritation in his tone.

Hange clasped their hands together, eyes wide and imploring.

“Levi, please!” they whined, fluttering their eyelashes in that ridiculously cute way they both knew he couldn’t resist.

“They sell those amazing candied chestnuts, the best in town really, and I need them to snack on tonight, you know. Could you buy me some while I... well, while I handle something else down the street?”

Levi raised a suspicious eyebrow. “What kind of ‘something else’?”

They leaned in with a playful smile. Their voice dropped to what they thought was a whisper, their breath tickling his ear. “It’s a secret!” 

“Fine,” Levi muttered with a sigh. “But be back soon or I’ll leave you here.”

Hange beamed at him, kissed his cheek and, before he could protest, slipped into the crowd.

⋆⁺₊❅.

His errand quickly taken care of, Levi decided to wait for Hange by a lamppost adorned with garlands next to the candy shop.

Scattered snowflakes drifted lazily in the cold air, delicately dusting his nose and eyelashes. With the sweet scent of roasted chestnuts wafting from a stall nearby or the distant echo of Christmas carols, the holiday cheer was slowly taking over him, more than he cared to admit.

He let his eyes wander over the busy street for a while.

A young boy bundled in a thick coat tugged at his grandfather’s sleeve, pointing excitedly at a toy shop, his big blue eyes full of dreams.

A few steps away, a couple was sitting close together on a bench, sharing a red scarf and laughing softly, their cheeks flushed from the cold or from something else, Levi couldn't tell.

He fished his phone out of the back pocket of his jeans as soon as it buzzed with a call from his best friend.

Erwin: Hey Levi! How’s your weekend so far? Are you busy?

Levi: Trapped in Hange’s holiday frenzy. Shitty snow everywhere. Fucking crowded. Your boy-scout’s ass would probably love it

Erwin: So, gift shopping it is?

Levi huffed, glancing down the street where Hange had disappeared.

Levi: Dragged me around town all afternoon, then sent me to buy some fucking treats

He snorted.

Levi: Got diabetes just looking at those by the way

Erwin: Come on Levi! Don’t pretend to be pissed, we both know you’re exactly where you want to be!

Levi rolled his eyes. He could hear the smirk in his friend’s tone but decided to ignore it.

Levi: They're plotting something. Probably buying more junk as we speak

Erwin chuckled.

Erwin: Be nice every once in a while, I promise it won’t kill you

Levi: If “nice” means standing around in the cold carrying a shitton of paper bags like a pack mule, I’d rather not be

Erwin: Never took you for a drama queen before

Levi clicked his tongue.

Levi: Drama queen huh? Well now, all I know is that I’m freezing my ass off waiting for them to finish whatever shit they’re up to

Erwin: Same old story for years. Let me guess -you didn’t want to go out, Hange insisted, and you gave in

Levi: Easier than arguing. You know how fucking stubborn they can be

His voice softened imperceptibly.

Levi: Besides, it’s just a few gifts. And candy.

Erwin: You’ll never admit it but you’re a softie, Levi

Levi: Just…shut the fuck up, dumbass

Erwin: All right, all right! See you tomorrow at the gym then?

Levi: Yeah, see you tomorrow

Sliding his phone back into his pocket, Levi adjusted his scarf and scanned the crowd again.

His fingers clutched at the bag holding the sweetmeats, and the corners of his lips twitched upward when the thought of Hange’s happy grin crossed his mind.

He glanced down the street again, finally spotting Hange weaving through the crowd, a red bag in their hand.

“What took you so long?” he asked gruffly as they finally joined him.

Hange plucked the bag of candy from him with a wink but didn’t reply.

“Thanks, Levi. These are gonna be perfect for our Hallmark movie night.”

“Yeah, yeah. Let’s go before you get any more stupid ideas,” he muttered, falling into step beside them.

Hange looped their arm through his, chattering away about the movies they had already picked for later.

⋆⁺₊❅.

The cold bit at their cheeks as they strolled through the snowy streets, their breath fogging in the crisp air. Twinkling lights lined the rooftops and shop windows, reflecting off the icy sidewalks.

Hange clung to Levi, their boots crunching in the snow. They had forgotten their mittens back home -again- but they were bundled in their usual chaotic style -layers upon layers of mismatched clothes topped with an absurdly fluffy, reindeer-themed hat. Its floppy antlers bobbed with every enthusiastic step.

He gave their head a flat look and tugged at the ear flaps. “That crap on your head looks ridiculous.”

“You mean ridiculously warm!” Hange replied with enthusiasm. “You’re just jealous you don’t have one.”

“Over my dead body,” he deadpanned.

Hange laughed, a boisterous, cheerful sound that always stirred something warm in his chest.

His gloved hand tightened slightly around theirs, his fingers curling to shield them from the cold, his thumb brushing the ring on their finger.

“Do you think Moblit will like the sketchbook? The leather cover is so beautiful.”

“It’ll suit him,” Levi said. His tone was flat, but Hange caught the faint note of approval.

“I can’t wait to hang the ornament we picked! It’s so pretty!”

“Should stop swinging your shopping bags then for fuck’s sake, Four-Eyes. Y’gonna break it before it even makes it to the tree.”

“Ok, I'll stop, I promise, Shorty!”

They turned their face toward the glowing shop windows, cheeks and nose pink from the cold. They beamed as they took in the festive decor.

“Isn’t this the best time of year? Just look at all these lights, Levi!”

He grunted but his pace slowed to keep in step with them.

“Not bad,” he conceded.

⋆⁺₊❅.

They strolled at a leisurely pace, Hange darting from one shop window to the next, their excitement bubbling over in a string of delighted “ohs” and “ahs.” Every so often, they dragged Levi along, pointing out the displays -a miniature train circling a snowy village or dolls and plushies all dressed up for a tea party.

Levi followed, his usual grumbles shushed by their enthusiasm.

When Hange stopped in front of a window, he paused, letting them press their nose on the glass. Inside, a collection of elegant scarves and gloves were neatly arranged, one catching their attention.

“Do you think Nanaba would wear this?” Hange mused, their breath fogging up the glass. “She loves practical gifts, but this one is also stylish.”

Levi didn’t answer immediately. Instead, his gaze lingered on them -the way the soft lights danced across their face, the way the sparkle of excitement lit up their eyes. And for some reason, their ridiculous hat somehow made them look endearingly cute.

He felt something swell in his chest, a comforting warmth pushing aside the winter chill.

Hange turned abruptly, catching his gaze. They smiled, wide and unguarded. “What?”

“Nothing,” he muttered, his hand tightening slightly around theirs.

Their grin grew, but they didn’t press him further, their fingers squeezing his back.

Hange leaned in suddenly and pressed a quick, warm kiss to Levi’s cheek, the chill of the night momentarily pushed further aside.

Levi froze, his ears turning faintly pink beneath the streetlights.

“Tch. What’s that for?” he groaned, shooting them a sideway glance.

“For being adorable,” Hange teased.

“I’m not-” he started, but the words caught in his throat as Hange squeezed his hand and kissed him briefly on the lips this time, their laughter ringing softly in the frosty air.

He sighed, shaking his head, but his lips twitched ever so slightly. The warmth from their kiss lingered, spreading through his chest.

“Come on,” he said, his voice softening. “Gotta walk or we’ll freeze to death.”

Hange laughed again, their breath clouding between them, and let Levi tug them away from the window.

“I hope Erwin’s going to like the book,” Hange said. “He always had a soft spot for poetry.”

“He’d better,” Levi muttered. “You spent twenty minutes debating between that and the essay about war strategy.”

“It was a tough choice!” Hange defended, their voice rising in mock indignation. “You can’t rush picking a gift for a friend, Levi.”

“Pretty sure he’ll just squeeze it in his shelf,” Levi shot back, but there was no bite to his words.

Hange laughed, turning to face him as they walked backward, gesturing animatedly. “You’re so-”

Their words cut off abruptly as their foot caught a patch of hidden ice. They yelped, arms flailing, but before they could hit the ground, Levi moved instinctively, catching them in one swift motion.

“Hange-” Levi uttered in a breath as he steadied them against his chest, his arms wrapping protectively around their waist.

For a moment, Hange had frozen, their hand clutching at their coat near the middle of their body as they regained their balance. Their face had paled slightly, but they quickly managed a shaky laugh, brushing it off. “That was close.”

Levi’s brows furrowed with concern as he studied their face.

“I’m fine,” Hange said quickly, their voice a little too light as they straightened up. A faint, sheepish smile crossed their lips, but their usual energy seemed slightly subdued. “Guess I got distracted.”

Levi didn’t look convinced. His grip lingered for a bit longer, his concerned gaze flicking over them before he finally let go.

“Watch where you’re stepping next time, idiot,” he scolded, though his voice lacked its usual sharpness.

Hange gave a small nod, glancing away as if to gather themself. Levi’s focus shifted briefly, catching the warm glow spilling out from a nearby window.

“Look,” he said quietly, gesturing with a tilt of his head.

Hange turned, realizing they were standing directly in front of the café where their first date had taken place. Its golden light spilled out onto the snow-covered street, just as inviting as it had been back then.

“You think they still have those weird drinks on the menu?”

Hange’s eyes lit up. “You mean the one with cinnamon and hot peppers? I’m still convinced it was a prank to be honest.”

Hange laughed, their breath misting in the cold air. “Well, I’m freezing and I’m sure you too. Since we’re here, might as well go inside.”

⋆⁺₊❅.

The door jingled as they entered, welcomed by the cheerful chatter and the clink of cups. The warmth of the café enveloped them instantly. It was crowded, but not enough to stop Hange from spotting their old table near the window.

Without hesitation, they started weaving through the maze of chairs and patrons. “I call dibs on the table!”

“Wait, there are still cups on it-” Levi tried to protest.

But Hange was already sliding into the booth, grinning as they sat down. “It’s the same table, Levi. We have to sit here.”

Levi frowned, glancing at the mess of empty cups and stained napkins left by the previous customers. “Really? Looks like it’s been hit by a tornado.”

“Don’t be such a grump.” Hange grinned, shoving their paper bags under the table. “Come on, it’s the perfect spot. It’s nostalgic!”

Levi sighed, but despite his grumbling, he sat down on the chair across from them.

“Nostalgic my ass.”

Levi got rid of his coat and scarf, folding them in a neat pile beside Hange.

His eye twitched as he looked at the scattered cups, their contents long gone but the mess still there. He let out a heavy sigh and immediately started to gather the dirty cups, sliding them to the side.

“Levi, seriously? It’s not like anyone cares,” Hange said, watching him with an amused grin as he stacked the cups into a pile.

“Well, I care,” he muttered, flicking a napkin out of the way. He wrinkled his nose. “It’s disgusting.”

Hange leaned back in their seat, watching the subtle twitch of Levi’s fingers as he rearranged everything to his liking. “You’re the only person I know who would willingly clean up after strangers in a café.”

“I’m not cleaning,” he grumbled. “Just... organizing.”

Before he could finish, the waitress arrived, smiling brightly as she swept the mess away effortlessly. “I’ll get these for you,” she said, flashing them a warm look.

Levi barely glanced up, his face already in its signature scowl. “Fucking finally,” he groaned under his breath.

The waitress wiped the table down, handing them menus with a cheerful “Here you go!” before turning to leave.

Hange chuckled. “You’re such a clean freak, you know.”

“Obviously not, since I live with a slob,” Levi muttered. “Just didn’t want to sit at a garbage dump.”

Hange tugged off their ridiculous hat, letting out a satisfied sigh. But when they ran a hand through their hair, Levi couldn't help but snort.

“Now your hair looks even worse than your hat,” he muttered, leaning back in his seat.

Hange chuckled. “Hey, no need to be so mean.”

Levi just clicked his tongue in response, casting an unimpressed glance at the wild mass of hair.

Hange raised an eyebrow. “What, you don’t think it’s cute?”

Levi didn’t answer, but he stood abruptly, pushing his chair back with a scrape. Unexpectedly, he leaned over the table, reaching for their hair. With soft, careful gestures, he began to smooth out the tangles, his fingers gently carding through the tousled locks.

Hange blinked in surprise at the unusual display, but as Levi’s focused expression softened, a real smile spread across their face -genuine and bright, something that lit up their eyes.

Levi’s nose and cheeks were flushed, his ears red from the cold -though Hange couldn’t help but hope the icy weather was not the only cause. They felt a wave of affection surge through them, their heart beating a little faster as they watched him.

“You’re cute, you know that?” Hange said softly, barely a whisper, as they let their smile widen.

Levi, completely unaware of the adoration in their gaze, mumbled something that sounded like a protest but didn’t pull away.

Just as he tucked a strand of hair behind Hange’s ear, the waitress came back to their table with a bright smile.

 “Well, aren’t you two the cutest lovebirds,” she said, teasing, as she set a small notepad down the table.

Hange giggled at the nickname.

“Lovebirds? How sweet!” they cooed, their face lighting up.

Levi, on the other hand, was clearly annoyed.

“Lovebirds? What the hell?” He grumbled under his breath. “What are we, spotty teens?”

“Oh, sorry, I didn’t mea-,” the waitress started.

Hange kicked Levi’s ankle under the table and smiled brightly at the waitress. “Don’t mind Mr. Grumpy Pants,” they said with a chuckle. “He's a decent little dude once you get to know him.”

Levi let out an exaggerated sigh, but Hange could see the faintest hint of a smile tugging at his lips.

The waitress scribbled down their orders. “I’ll be right back with your drinks.”

As she turned and walked away, Hange and Levi locked eyes, reaching out over the table to intertwine their fingers.

It seemed it had been ages since their first date. Yet, in this very moment, in this very place, everything just felt the same as it had that day.

The golden warmth of the fall afternoon sun bathed the café in a welcoming atmosphere. Outside, the air was crisp, with a faint chill that only seemed to make the cozy place more enjoyable.

Levi had been sitting at a small table by the window for a while now, his expression unreadable, but his gaze soft as he stared outside.

Along the street, beeches and pin oaks were shedding their leaves, fiery reds, oranges, and yellows drifting down in the cold wind to the sidewalk below. A few passers-by, wrapped in their jackets, occasionally paused to admire the beautiful display of fall colors. Levi’s eyes briefly lingered on them in the same detached way he observed everything around him.

Only a few customers were scattered throughout the quiet café. The smell of freshly brewed coffee and warm pastries wafted to him from time to time.

Levi looked effortlessly handsome, in his simple but elegant outfit, his well-cut jacket fitting him just right.

He glanced at his watch for the third time since he arrived and sighed.

He leaned back in his seat and grabbed the menu, his gaze momentarily shifting to the words printed on it. He wasn’t hungry, not really, but the menu offered a distraction while he waited.

As he scanned the list, he remained blissfully unaware of the admiring glances exchanged between the waitress and the cashier girl, both of them casting furtive looks at him from behind the counter.

The café’s door swung open in a burst. Levi jolted in his seat, startled by the sudden ringing of the bell, and his eyes immediately shot up from the menu.

Hange.

A gust of cold air followed them as they stepped in with sparkling energy. A whirlwind.

Their messy hair fluffed by the wind and a wide smile on their lively face, they bounced into the café and scanned the room with excitement.

The waitress and cashier exchanged a quick, amused glance before giggling softly, their eyes trailing over Hange’s disheveled state.

Levi, however, frowned as he watched them, his eyes narrowing at the sight of Hange’s hair sticking out in every direction.

As Hange spotted Levi at the table and waved at him, their smile widening, the girls’ mouths dropped open in surprise.

Their eyes flicked between the two of them, slowly realizing that this was the person Levi had been waiting for. It hit them both at once, their expressions shifting from curiosity to astonishment as they witnessed the connection between Levi, who seemed so quiet and composed, and the exuberant person now making their way toward him.

Hange almost tripped over their own feet as they made their way to Levi’s table, narrowly catching themself before they stumbled. They plopped down dramatically into the seat across from him, speaking loudly as though the entire café needed to hear.

"Sorry I’m late! The wind’s insane today," Hange said in an animated tone.

Levi didn’t reply immediately, but a hint of disapproval flickered in his eyes as he took in their unkempt state, spotting leaves stuck in their wild hair, a tangled mess of autumn colors.

Completely oblivious to their own disarray -and to Levi’s softening gaze- Hange reached into their pocket, pulling out a heart-shaped golden leaf and holding it out to Levi with a grin.

“For you!”

Levi took the leaf, his expression neutral.

“You’re a mess,” he muttered, “and you’re late.”

"So sorry to be late but those leaves are so pretty! I had to find the perfect one for you! You see, the heart shape? This is basically nature’s way of blessing our date.”

Levi looked down at the leaf in his hand, then back up at Hange, his lips twitching ever so slightly as if he held back a smile.

The waitress joined them as he thanked Hange for their unusual gift.

Hange leaned forward to make their order. “I’ll have the pumpkin chai latte, with extra sugar and extra whipped cream, and, oh! Do you have any sprinkles?”

They looked at the waitress with wide, sparkling eyes.

Levi didn’t even blink as he ordered, “Black tea. No sugar.”

Hange raised an eyebrow. “Seriously? You're just gonna drink... sadness in a cup?”

Levi glanced at them, trying his best to suppress the slight irritation creeping into his voice. “Says the one ordering dessert instead of coffee.”

“Oh, come on! It's fall! It’s a vibe!" Hange insisted, grinning. "What’s better in life than whipped cream and sprinkles?”

Levi scoffed, shaking his head. “Not getting diabetes every time you drink coffee?”

“Just let me enjoy my dose of comfort while you sip your bland, depressing beverage,” Hange teased.

Their drinks arrived shortly and Hange started to tell one of their passionate stories, waving their arms dramatically. “Okay, so the other day I was reading this book about quantum physics and-”

Levi listened quietly, drinking in their animated features as he took a careful sip of his hot tea.

“-it’s fascinating!” Hange continued, oblivious to his lingering gaze. “So, what if we could shift our density to one similar to gas and phase through walls?”

Levi rolled his eyes. ”Who the hell would care about something that useless?”

Hange grinned widely. “Well, I find it fascinating. And fun! What about you, huh? What’s your idea of fun?”

“I don’t know… Cleaning, maybe…”

Hange chuckled, but before they could reply, Levi reached across the table, his fingers brushing through their tousled hair. “Got a leaf in your hair,” he whispered.

He gently pulled the golden leaf from the mess of hair, his touch surprisingly delicate, as though he had done this a hundred times before.

Hange froze, blinking up at him, caught off guard by the sudden attention. Their heartbeat quickened. He had never been so close to them, and this all felt somewhat… intimate.

Totally unaware of the effect his small gesture had, Levi sat back to sip his tea.

A blush crept up their neck, but before overthinking Levi’s gesture, they cleared their throat and went back to their story, gesturing wildly as if nothing had happened.

“So, yeah, imagine if we could just phase through walls! The possibilities would be endless!”

Eager to return to their usual chatter, Hange went on blabbering about physics with animated gestures until their hand, in the middle of their rambling, swept across the table, knocking their pumpkin chai latte off.

The drink toppled over, splashing onto the table and spilling across Hange’s sleeve.

“Oh, crap!” Hange grabbed a napkin and immediately started scrambling to clean up the mess, though all they were really doing was spreading the stain.

Levi sighed, pushing his tea aside, then reached into his pocket for his neatly folded handkerchief. Without a word, he slid it across the table toward them.

Hange looked at the handkerchief before meeting Levi’s eyes with a sheepish grin.

“Oh, I’m so sorry, Levi, I swear I’m not usually this clumsy-"

Clearly not convinced, Levi raised an eyebrow.

“And I don't want to ruin your handkerchief.”

“Don’t bother. You’ll probably spill something else on it anyway,” he deadpanned.

Hange chuckled nervously. "Fair enough… I’ll wash it and return it, of course."

Levi leaned back in his chair as Hange wiped their sleeve, and his gaze briefly drifted out of the window, his fingers tracing lightly the rim of his cup. He thought of Erwin, who had been so sure he would get along with Hange.

"Seriously, Levi," Erwin had said a week ago, when Levi hesitated, "I can tell you two are going to hit it off. Just say yes to the invite. You’ll be glad you did."

Levi had been annoyed by the unsolicited advice at the time, but now, as he looked at Hange across from him, he told himself that maybe… Well, maybe Erwin had been right.

His hand brushed against Hange’s briefly as they both reached for the napkins at the same time. A small spark of warmth radiated from the touch.

He glanced over at Hange, still too caught up in cleaning the last traces of whipped cream from their earlier mishap. Levi would probably never admit it aloud, but Erwin was right. He was glad he had said yes.

The conversation resumed, Hange trying to act like they weren't mortified over the spill.

When the waitress returned to clean the table, she winked at the cashier girl who stood by the counter, both of them exchanging a knowing look before focusing on their task.

They had noticed the soft way Levi and Hange’s eyes lingered on each other, the small, unspoken moments that they weren’t quite aware of -the way Levi’s hand brushed Hange’s, how Hange’s smile widened when their eyes met.

It was obvious that something was shifting between the two.

The waitress quickly cleared the last of the napkins and mugs, trying to remain professional, but a small, amused smile tugged at the corners of her lips.

When she reached the counter, the cashier girl leaned over, still watching the couple from afar. “Something’s going on, huh?” she murmured.

The waitress shook her head with a chuckle. “They don’t even know it yet.”

Hange pushed their chair back abruptly, their usual whirlwind energy somewhat coming back. “Let’s go for a walk,” they proposed, tugging at their coat. “I know a park nearby.”

“Ok,” he muttered, rising to go and pay the check.

Levi soon reached the counter and handed over the cash, his eyes drifting toward Hange as the cashier counted out his change. They were near the door, fumbling with their scarf as it caught awkwardly in their coat. However, their smile, bright and unbothered, lit up their face.

He turned away, walking a few paces to the side to slip his wallet back into his pocket.

His fingers brushed the soft edges of the leaf Hange had given him earlier. The absurdity of it -a heart-shaped leaf, of all things, really?- should have annoyed him. But instead, he felt an unfamiliar warmth bloom in his chest.

“They’re cute together,” the cashier whispered as he put on his gloves.

“Definitely mismatched,” the waitress murmured, lowering her voice. “But, somehow, it works. He’s all gruff and serious and handsome; and they’re... well...”

Levi caught enough of their comments to make his brow twitch.

The waitress smirked. “Maybe he has a thing for chaos.”

“The way he’s watching them?” the cashier continued,”Bet he doesn’t even realize he’s totally smitten.”

The word made Levi’s jaw tighten. He wrapped his scarf around his neck and turned abruptly toward the door.

He muttered something under his breath as he walked across the café, his ears burning faintly.

Hange had finally managed to get their coat on and grinned up at him, oblivious to the way he was still recovering from the girls’ words.

“All set?” they asked cheerfully, entirely unaware of his internal turmoil.

“Yeah. Let’s go.”

Levi pushed the door open for them, the sound of the two girls’ muffled giggles following them as they stepped outside.

⋆⁺₊❅.

The brisk air was refreshing. As soon as they entered the quiet park, Hange veered off the path, scanning the ground. They crouched to pick up a golden leaf, then another, holding them up to study their shape and texture.

Levi watched them from a step behind, his hands shoved deep into his pockets. The cold wind didn’t bother him when a faint warmth crept up his neck as he observed their overwhelming, almost childish enthusiasm. It was chaotic, messy, yet oddly endearing.

They reached a small pond and Hange stopped, gazing at their reflection in the water with an unusual frown.

“I’m terrible at this,” they said suddenly, breaking the silence. “Dating, I mean. I’m... too much. People don’t usually stick around.”

Levi stopped beside them, glancing at their solemn expression before speaking in a gentle tone. “Maybe you just haven’t met someone who can handle it.”

Hange’s head turned toward him.

They locked eyes and silence hung in the air between them for a while.

Then, a mischievous smile curled on their lips. “Handle it, huh? Are you volunteering for the job?”

Their eyelashes fluttered playfully.

Levi rolled his eyes, but his faint smirk betrayed him. “Tch. Don’t read too much into it.”

They continued walking along the park path, the autumn leaves crunching softly under their feet. Hange slowed every so often to examine a particular leaf or to show him the different species of trees, rambling enthusiastically about them.

Levi followed silently, his hands tucked into his pockets, his gaze never leaving Hange.

They passed a vendor selling small trinkets and plush toys. Among them, a chubby titan plush caught Hange’s eye, and they froze.

“Levi!” they gasped, pointing at it with childlike excitement. “Look at this cutie! I need it.”

“A plushie, really? What are you, five?” Levi deadpanned

He glanced at the stuffed toy. Of course, it was ridiculously huge. However, he thought, he hadn’t brought flowers to his date after all. So, he couldn’t do otherwise than oblige now, could he?

When he handed the plush to a beaming Hange, they hugged it like it was the most precious treasure in the world.

“This will go perfectly with my collection!” Hange exclaimed.

Levi raised an eyebrow. “Collection of what? Ugly monsters?”

“Hey! It’s cute,” they protested, holding the plush protectively. “And you got it for me, which makes it extra special.”

Levi scoffed but glanced away, embarrassed by the warmth creeping up his cheeks.

He cleared his throat before speaking again. “We should go, it’s getting dark out here.”

They crossed the park at a leisurely pace.

“You know, when I told Eyebrows I was asking you out, he gave me this weird smirk, like he’d predicted it or something,” Hange blurted out after a while.

Levi side-eyed them, hands fidgeting in his pockets. “Sounds like him.”

“Actually, he told me, ‘Levi would enjoy your company more than he lets on.’ I think he oversold it.”

Levi chuckled.

“Did he bribe you to say yes?” Hange asked.

“All he said was that you were tolerable,” Levi replied with a smirk, his tone deadpan. “He left out the part where you’d try to drown the table in chai latte.”

“So he did scheme!” Hange exclaimed. “I knew it! Not that I’m complaining though…”

Levi glanced sideways at them again, noticing the faint flush on their cheeks.

They had reached the edge of the park when Hange stopped suddenly at the corner where they had to part ways.

“Thanks for walking me,” Hange said. “I’m this way.”

They gestured toward their street, their hand lingering mid-air as if unsure whether to wave or stay still.

Levi shifted his weight, smoothing down the golden leaf still tucked in his pocket.

 “You’d probably have tripped and stumbled in the mud otherwise.”

Hange laughed, their voice warm. “Sounds like something I could do, yeah.”

The street felt quiet for a moment. Hange looked at Levi, their usual confidence shifting into something hesitant, almost shy.

“Well…” They tilted their head, a small, nervous smile forming.

Before Levi could think it through, his hand moved, reaching out to brush a stray strand of hair away from their forehead. The gesture was brief but tender, catching Hange off guard. Their eyes widened slightly, their cheeks warming as they stood frozen for a second.

Levi pulled his hand back, his expression unreadable except for the faintest hint of something soft in his gaze. “Your hair’s a fucking mess, Four-Eyes.”

The tension just vanished and they both laughed softly.

As Levi was about to turn to leave, Hange surprised him, leaning in and brushing the lightest, most hesitant kiss against his cheek.

“Thanks for today,” they said quietly, stepping back before Levi could reply.

Levi stared at them, momentarily at a loss for words.

His face burned, whether from the cold or something else entirely, he couldn’t say.

“Just don’t be late next time,” he replied, walking away before Hange could see the faint smile tugging at the corner of his lips.

Hange watched him go before turning and heading home, their smile never fading.

Levi and Hange were lost in their own small world at the corner table, the humming of conversations and the occasional clink of porcelain blurred in the background. Steam curled up from their drinks, warming their cold hands and flushing their cheeks.

Hange took a generous sip of their overly sweet concoction and sighed contentedly.

“This really takes me back,” they said, their voice tinged with nostalgia. “It feels like nothing’s changed here.”

Levi hummed quietly in agreement, his black tea cooling in front of him. His eyes drifted to Hange’s hand resting on the table, fingers drumming absently against the wood. Without thinking, his own hand shifted closer, brushing against theirs in a fleeting touch.

Hange glanced up, surprised by the uncharacteristic gesture, but Levi kept his gaze fixed on his cup. “I still have it, you know,” he confessed, his voice low, almost reluctant.

“Have what?” Hange tilted their head, their curiosity piqued.

“The leaf,” Levi said simply, his thumb lightly grazing over Hange’s knuckles now. “The one you gave me that day. Pressed it in a book.” He paused, feeling the heat rise to his face. “Still there.”

Hange blinked, their expression softening into something unmistakably tender. “You’re kidding.”

“Do I look like I’m joking?” Levi grumbled, finally meeting their gaze.

Hange’s face broke into a radiant smile, one that made Levi’s chest tighten in that familiar, inexplicable way. “Levi Ackerman, you always surprise me,” they teased.

“Tch. Don’t get used to it,” he deadpanned. However, he didn’t pull his hand away, his thumb slightly brushing their ring instead.

Hange hesitated, their fingers curling around the edge of their mug as they shifted slightly in their seat. Their eyes flickered between Levi’s face and the steam rising from their drink before finally settling on the view outside the window..

“That first date. I still think about it often.”

Levi watched them quietly, his brow furrowing slightly at their uncharacteristic hesitation. “You do?” he asked softly, as though he wasn’t sure if he should press.

Hange nodded, their gaze dropping for a moment before they bit their lip, a faint smile playing at the corners of their mouth.

“Yeah. Especially…” Their voice trailed off as they glanced again toward the window to watch the soft snow falling outside. “The plushie you got me.”

Levi’s lips tugged upward as he thought about the ugly stuffed toy sitting in Hange’s office. “Don’t know why you’ve kept that thing all this time.”

“It’s sentimental,” they add in a whisper. “You got it for me and I love it.”

They fell silent, the weight of their words hanging in the air for a while.

Levi gently squeezed their hand and their eyes met.

Then suddenly, as though deciding something, Hange leaned down, fumbling among the paper bags resting by their feet. They picked up the red one, their fingers tightening on the handles as they placed it on the table in front of Levi.

He blinked at the bag, then at Hange, who was now watching him with a nervous expression.

“What’s this?” he asked, narrowing his eyes slightly.

“I was going to wait until Christmas,” Hange began quickly, their words tumbling over one another. “But this… this just feels like the right moment.”

Levi raised a skeptical eyebrow but pulled the bag toward him, carefully lifting out the contents. His movements stilled when he realized what it was: a soft, absurdly detailed titan onesie.

For a moment, Levi said nothing, simply staring at the tiny outfit in his hands. His thumb brushed over the fabric, lingering on the little details -the ridiculous hood, the tiny mittens. Then his eyes flicked up to meet Hange’s.

Their heart pounded as they studied his face for any reaction, their own nerves fraying with each passing second. “It’s, uh, a little… symbolic,” they started, biting their lip again.

His lips parted slightly, and for a fleeting second, Hange swore they saw a flicker of emotion in his usually composed expression. 

He cleared his throat.

“You… You’re serious?” he asked, almost breathless.

Hange simply nodded, their nervous smile giving way to something warmer, more certain.

Levi’s gaze dropped back to the onesie in his hands. He clicked his tongue, but the corners of his mouth turned upward, the faintest hint of a smile breaking through.

“A titan onesie. Of course you had to make it weird, Four-Eyes.”

Hange laughed, their shoulders relaxing as relief and joy washed over them. “Would you expect anything less from me?”

Levi didn’t answer, but smiled instead, his eyes still on the onesie as his fingers brushed over it again, this time more gently.

The room was quiet, save for the soft ticking of the clock on the bedside table. The flickering glow of the street lights peeked through a crack in the curtain, painting patterns and shadows on the walls.

Levi lay behind Hange, his arm draped protectively over their side. They were sound asleep, their breathing slow and even, their hair a messy halo over the pillow.

He could feel the gentle rise and fall of their chest beneath his arm, a steady rhythm that usually lulled him to sleep.

But tonight Levi’s eyes remained open, his gaze fixed on the ceiling. His mind raced with a muddle of thoughts he couldn’t quite organize.

A dad. He was going to be a dad.

The thought alone sent an odd mix of feelings coursing through him -anticipation, fear, uncertainty. What the hell did he know about being a father? Could he even do this?

His chest tightened, but before the doubts could spiral further, he shifted closer to Hange, burying his nose in the crook of their neck. The faint earthy scent of their skin and the warmth of their body slowly shushed his anxious thoughts.

His hand brushed gently over their belly. He let out a quiet breath, and started to whisper in the dark as if the baby could somehow hear him.

“Oi, brat. Hope you get the color of their eyes. Or their brains. Or maybe their enthusiasm, I don’t fucking know…. Whatever, you’ll be amazing like them anyway.” He chuckled. “Don’t tell them or Four-Eyes will never let me hear the end of it.”

He pressed a kiss to the back of Hange’s neck, soft and lingering.

“Don’t know how that works but I’ll do my best. We’ll do our best. And I’ll love you just as much as I love them. I promise.”

As he kissed their warm skin again, Hange stirred faintly, letting out a quiet sigh before settling back into sleep. Levi closed his eyes, letting their presence soothe him.

For now, he would let the worry go.

For now, he would just hold them and cherish this moment.

All graphics by me

🎀❤️ REBLOGS APPRECIATED ❤️🎀

[snwusberry]

pairing: dad!wooyoung x mom!black reader

warning(s): eating

genre: fluff

wc: 1294

on my "wooyoung girl dad" agenda

reader pov

man this girl can talk. almost as much as her father, and put them in the kitchen together? absolute chaos, but i love every single second of it.

the kitchen is a mess with mixing bowls littering the counters, used measuring cups scattered everywhere, and four everywhere but in a bowl. the christmas eve chaos is in full swing.

usually we'd buy ready made cookie dough but this time, self proclaimed master chef jung wooyoung, and his sous chef j.j decided we'd nara smith the cookies today. i said master chef, not pastry chef, by the way.

"okay jiah, its your turn to mix the dry ingredients, but do it gently so the flour doesnt get everywhere." i say, handing the little girl the whisk.

she grabs it with both hands and looks at me with all the seriousness she can muster.

"dont worry mommy, i'm a professional baker." she tells me with determination.

see what her father is feeding her?

"i see so." i agree and she smiles widely, before she starts whisking.

"my baby, you've got a littke flour on your nose." wooyoung says from across the counter where he's rolling out dough with far too much flair and jiah gasps, dropping the whisk and patting her face.

"where?"

"here." wooyoung answers, pointing at his own face, unable to contain his laughter. "you look like a little snowman."

with that she grabs a handful of flour and throws it in his direction. i guess she didnt like that.

"hey i was joking. no need to attack your own father."

"at this point we won't have enough cookies for santa." i comment, looking at all the incorrect uses of flour happening. taking a bite of one of the cookies that were put on the cooling rack.

"yeah because you're eating them all." wooyoung comments and i stick my tongue out at him, and jiah must've found that really funny because she let's out her cute little laugh.

"you try resisting all these cookies while carrying another one of your big headed babies." i snap back and he raises his hands.

"we're going to make the best cookies ever! santa's gonna love them." jiah exclaims after stuffing a handful of dough in her mouth. when she got to wooyoung, is a mystery to me but she managed to snatch some cookie dough for herself. hopefully she doesn't have a stomach bug tomorrow, or she'll be really upset.

"obviously. with us in charge, he's going to think they're gourmet." wooyoung chimes in.

he tosses even more flour on the counter before cutting out christmas tree shapes that were bought specifically for the occasion. you can definitely say thing one and thing two were more than excited for christmas this year.

"daddy, you don't even know what gourmet means!"

i snort, trying mot to laugh amd loom to wooyoung who's mouth hangs open in fake offense. self proclaimed master chef, remember?

"excuse me young lady, i happen to know exactly what gourmet means. it means fancy, just like my cooking, thank you very much."

i roll my eyes, placing the already cut dough on the baking sheet. "how about we focus on getting these in the oven before you two destroy my kitchen."

"she started it." wooyoung says, pointing at jiah who dramatically gasps.

"no, you did. you started it when you said i look like a snowman."

i shake my head at the two, fighting the smile that still manages to make it on my face.

"a cute snowman, my baby." he says, trying ti save face and it works because jiah smiles widely at him.

"the cutest?"

"yes, the cutest."

"aren't you guys cute." i comment after witnessing the cute interaction.

i watch as wooyoung puts the tray in the oven before he starts preparing the wet ingredients for the new batch while j.j sneaks me two more cookies.

"for the baby." she whispers a lottke too loudly and i catch wooyoung looking at us.

if its anyone who's more excited for the baby on the way, it's jiah. the moment we told her she'd be an older sister, she's been nothing short of excited. when wooyoung explained that i needed rest and "to be taken care of" during this time she'd to things like what she did just now.

"not enough for santa, remember?" wooyoung said sarcastically but i know he doesnt really care.

"he'll be fine if he gets just two, won't he princess?" i respond and jiah nods rapidly with her mouth full. well there goes another one.

"mommy, do you think he'd like sprinkles?" she asks once she gets a look at the dough wooyoung is mixing.

"i think he'll like anything."

she hums thoughtfully and picks up the jar of sprinkles before dumping some on the dough for wooyoung to fold in.

"i think he'll like the sprinkles. they're prettier."

"sprinkles are the best." wooyoung comments, grabbing some for himself amd tossing them into his mouth.

"daddy, those are for santa!" jiah yells.

"relax, theres plenty left." he says, grinning.

"if you eat the decorations, you'll end up on the naughty list." i chime in, in jiah's defense as if i didn't just tear up a few cookies just now.

"wouldn't be the first time." he quips, throwing a wink at me.

"the dough wooyoung." i remind him and he smirks.

the three of us continue working together to finish the cookies, with the occasional banter and sassy comments from j.j shot towards her father. by the time the last batch is in the oven, we're all tired and i lean against the counter, surveying the mess.

“you know. we could’ve just bought cookies at the store. santa wouldn’t know the difference.”

jiah's jaw drops, and she stares at me like i've just said the most blasphemous thing in the world.

“mommy! you can’t buy cookies for santa! that's cheating!”

as if ready made dough is any better, but okay.

“yeah, mommy. what kind of example are you setting?” wooyoung chimes in, grinning.

i roll my eyes, but i'm smiling. “alright, alright. homemade cookies it is.”

she takes another cookie and takes a bite and immediately lets out a happy hum.

“santa is definitely gonna love these!” she exclaims and wooyoung takes a bite from the cookie in her hand, this being the first time he gets a taste.

“not bad, kiddo. we make a pretty good team.” she grins, her mouth full of cookie crumbs.

“yeah! we’re the best cookie makers ever!”

i can’t help but laugh as i watch the two of them, so alike in their playful, talkative ways. the kitchen is a mess, but my heart feels so full.

“alright.” i say, grabbing a plate for santa's cookies. “let's leave these out with some milk, and then it’s off to bed. santa won’t come if you’re still awake.”

“okay, mommy!” she says, helping me arrange the cookies on the plate.

wooyoung picks her up and swings her around, making her giggle.

“let's get you to bed, hmm?" she nods.

after tucking her in, and cleaning up, wooyoung and i put the cookies back in the cookie jar and he warms up some milk for me to drink before bed.

we sit down together in the living room when wooyoung puts a hand on ny growing belly and let's out a content sigh.

"you're in for a treat my angel." he says softly and i smile at him. "your sister gets nore and more impatient to meet you and we're anticipating your arrival too. mommy and daddy love you."

he presses a kiss on my belly and sits up straight again.

"and i love you, baby." he says to me, leaning in to kiss my lips.

"i love you too."

[lvnchh]

Burnt Edges

Abby Anderson x f!reader (with PTSD) 👉🏻original version 👈🏻 Wanted to make another version for my Abby girls so y'all can feel represented too 🫶🏻

I'm a minor and if you want to complain or insult me about it, just don't interact🙏🏻. It's my life, and I'm free to write whatever I want as long as I'm not bothering anyone. Also, please don't judge any grammar mistakes, as English is not my native language. I'm sorry if the whole story isn't that good.

TW: I have PTSD (DIAGNOSED), and what you're about to read is based on my personal experiences. Writing about it is a form of therapy for me. If you are sensitive to topics like violence and domestic violence, please do not continue reading. Thank you🙏🏻

Btw I need more Abby x PTSD reader stories because I want to feel less alone and represented

story below the cut

The WLF base was bustling as usual, soldiers moving in every direction with purpose. It was organized chaos, but the rhythm of it kept your mind just busy enough to not wander too far. You had been here for weeks now, a stray who Abby had somehow decided was worth keeping around. She didn’t talk much about why—just said you seemed “useful” and left it at that.

But tonight, after the day’s drills and patrols, you needed air. The weight in your chest had been building all day, the familiar tightness creeping in. The base was too loud, too crowded, too much like the chaos you used to live in. You found yourself climbing to the roof, the one place no one ever seemed to go.

When the door creaked open behind you, you sighed. So much for solitude.

“Figured I’d find you up here,” Abby said, her voice steady but not unkind.

You turned, finding her leaning casually against the doorway. Her braid hung over her shoulder, and her broad frame filled the space effortlessly. Abby was intimidating at first glance—hell, even second and third glance—but there was something about her that made you feel safe in a way you hadn’t in a long time.

“What gave me away?” you asked, forcing a weak smile as you lit your cigarette.

Abby stepped onto the roof and shrugged. “You disappear when you’re overwhelmed. You’re not as sneaky as you think.”

Her bluntness was typical, but it wasn’t cruel. If anything, it was grounding. She moved to sit beside you, her heavy boots thudding against the concrete as she stretched her legs out.

The two of you sat in silence for a while, the distant hum of the base fading into the background. Abby wasn’t much for small talk, and you appreciated that.

“You smoke a lot for someone who can barely keep up on a run,” she teased eventually, smirking as she glanced at you.

You snorted, shaking your head. “Yeah, well… cardio’s overrated.”

“Not when you’re being chased by infected.”

“Fair point.”

Another silence settled, and you found yourself exhaling a plume of smoke, watching it dissipate into the night. You could feel Abby’s eyes on you, her curiosity barely masked. She wasn’t the kind to pry, but she wasn’t one to let something slide if she thought it mattered.

“You’ve been… off today,” she said after a moment, her voice quieter than usual.

You stiffened, gripping the cigarette between your fingers. “What do you mean?”

Abby shrugged, leaning back on her hands. “You didn’t even flinch when Manny cracked a joke at you earlier. Usually, you’d at least roll your eyes. Something’s eating at you.”

You hesitated, the weight in your chest growing heavier. Abby wasn’t wrong, but the idea of saying it out loud felt suffocating. Still, the look she gave you—patient, steady—made you feel like maybe you could.

“It’s… nothing,” you muttered at first, then winced at her unimpressed scoff. “Okay, fine. It’s not nothing. It’s just—this place. The noise, the shouting, the slamming doors. It reminds me of… home.”

Abby tilted her head, her brows knitting slightly. “Home?”

You took another drag of your cigarette, the smoke burning your throat. “My dad. let’s just say he wasn’t exactly Father of the Year material. Yelling was the least of it.”

You didn’t elaborate, but Abby’s sharp eyes softened, her expression shifting from curiosity to something that looked like understanding.

“Shit,” she muttered, leaning forward. “I didn’t know.”

“Yeah, well,” you said, flicking the ash off your cigarette, “it’s not exactly something I put on my résumé.”

Abby huffed a laugh at that, but it was soft, almost careful. She leaned back again, her gaze fixed on the skyline. “That why you’re always so jumpy?”

You nodded, not bothering to deny it. “PTSD’s a hell of a ride.”

She was quiet for a moment, the tension between you settling into something heavier but not unwelcome. “I can’t even imagine what that’s like,” she said finally, her voice low. “But… I get the needing space part. I didn’t grow up with that kind of shit, but since… since everything with my dad and the Fireflies, sometimes it feels like I can’t breathe when things get too loud.”

Her admission caught you off guard, and you turned to look at her. For all her strength, Abby carried a weight too. It was different from yours, but it was still there, etched into the set of her jaw and the faint lines around her eyes.

“Well,” you said, smirking despite the heaviness in your chest, “guess we’re both a little screwed up.”

“Guess so,” Abby agreed, a faint smile tugging at her lips.

You took one last drag of your cigarette before stubbing it out against the concrete. Then, without thinking, you added, “What can I say? My PTSD made me hotter.”

Abby blinked, staring at you for a moment before bursting into a laugh—a real, genuine laugh that echoed into the night. It was rare to hear her laugh like that, and you couldn’t help but grin, feeling a little lighter just from the sound.

“You’re ridiculous,” she said, shaking her head as she wiped a tear from the corner of her eye.

“Yeah, but you love it,” you shot back, leaning back on your hands with a smug smile.

Abby rolled her eyes, but the warmth in her expression betrayed her. “Don’t push your luck, rookie.”

[tempests-bards-and-birds]

i think that one of the most tragic aspects of venti's character is the fact that no matter how hard he tries, no replication that he can make of the bard will ever be perfect because for a single image or concept to be long-lasting and static goes entirely against the nature of the wind.

it has been consistently emphasised throughout the game that "seeds of stories brought by the wind" will be "cultivated" by time - in other words, they will grow, but they will never remain the same as they were when they were first told; to try to remove that element of warping and artistic interpretation that is inevitable as a story is passed on is like trying to bottle up a storm and hoping that'll stop it from damaging the surroundings - instead, no one will ever know about it, and the only thing that it will have left to destroy will be itself.

venti is basically doing exactly this by trying to preserve the bard's memory - the only way to stop it from being warped would be to remove it from any kind of environment where that could happen, which would require taking the story out of circulation, which then means that he is the only living being who knows it in its whole detail and entirety. he understands, however, the fallibility of his own memory, as can be seen in how reminders of it seem to shake him; in his story quest, he seems strangely unguarded after resolving the situation with hans (whose story is massively identical to venti's for a reason - having a mirror can be very useful for storytelling, and genshin relies on it perhaps a bit too much), describing the barbatos statue as "the usual place" despite the fact that for our traveler, it is not (this ties into another theory that i am Not going into here lol). we know that venti prizes being able to keep a certain level of anonymity, with him describing the traveler's high level of intuition as "scary", so for him to show even the slightest level of disregard for maintaining his façade suggests that being faced with the reality of the impossibility of his self-imposed purpose is something that did really bother him (which tbf makes sense now that i write it out).

comparisons have been made before between venti and zhongli wherein the irony of having a god of wind whose appearance is unchanging and a god of stone who is (supposedly, if we assume zhongli's teasing about his own past forms to be reflective of the truth) in contrast constantly shifting is often key, and in a lot of ways zhongli's situation does mirror venti's in many ways; he theoretically has the ability to accurately preserve history as one would by carving it into stone, and yet it is almost as if he lets it slip through his fingers instead - he finds humour in inaccurate historical accounts and allows himself to change, not just physically but in terms of attitude (the whole point of the liyue aq is for him to be able to do this; to live as a mortal after millenia spent overseeing as a god). in many ways venti and zhongli are polar opposites, but the theme of wanting to transcend one's physical constraints, of wanting a state of existence that the other already in theory has, is consistent throughout both.

venti, however, seems to be so much more uncomfortable with this than zhongli is, and this awareness of the issue while still being so bothered by it to the extent that he pushes it away even more, causing the pressure in that jar to by extension increase too, is where the true point of tragedy lies.

maybe, though, by deciding to share the bard's story with the traveler, he is beginning to accept the necessity for change.

[aishangotome]

Azel Radwan: Chapter 3

Chapter 2

Thank you @shatcey for providing the video for this chapter!

♡———♡

Azel: Good evening. I've been wanting to see you, you know?

When I came to, I was here again.

In this rose garden full of buds, there’s a man with an otherworldly appearance, resting his hand on an oak table.

I have a strange feeling like this has happened before, or maybe it hasn't.

(Somehow, only the presence of this Living God feels strangely vivid.)

Emma: ...A dream, right?

Azel: Oh? There's no way to prove which is the dream and which is reality.

Azel: Human wisdom hasn't progressed enough to unravel the mysteries of dreams.

Azel: It's possible that you being here is actually reality, and vice versa.

(I kind of understand, but I kind of don't.)

Azel: By the way, are you good at cooking?

Suddenly switching from a mystical topic to a realistic one, it took me a while to grasp the meaning.

Emma: I wouldn't say I'm good at it, but I can make decent food.

Azel: That's good. Actually, I've been interested in the local cuisine of Rhodolite.

Emma: ...Why are you suddenly bringing this up?

Azel: Because I know what will happen in the future.

Azel: When the time comes, you'll understand my intentions.

(It's hard to believe, but I guess that's how Gods are.)

Azel: By the way, I haven't had dinner today.

Emma: Eh? Are you feeling unwell?

Azel: No, it's due to various circumstances.

Azel: You're supposed to be a kind-hearted woman. You wouldn't do something cruel like leave a God on the verge of starvation, would you?

Emma: ...Rather than a prophecy, it feels like you're blatantly pressuring me to "come and cook for you."

Azel: Not at all, not at all. I'm just telling you that I prefer hearty meals to sweets, but I have no ulterior motives.

(I feel like there's nothing but ulterior motives.)

Azel: Besides, "you" over there hardly remembers what happened here.

Azel: There's no point in pressuring you, is there?

Prince Azel smiles mercifully – and the world begins to distort.

Azel: Ah, I'm looking forward to it.

Azel: –– ...I just happened to need a slave.

-

I woke up with a start, drawn by the light, and found myself in the guest room that had been given to me yesterday.

(I think I had another dream.)

(...It was a dream with the Living God in it.)

As usual, my memories crumbled away.

What remained today was the puzzling information "hearty meals, not sweets," and a chilling, inexplicable pounding of my heart.

(It wasn't a nightmare, but... how strange.)

-

Emma: There's something I've been wondering about...

Emma: Owner, what's that?

The city surrounding Tanzanite Castle was even more lively than Rhodolite.

The reason was obvious; everywhere I looked, there were tourists who seemed to have come from foreign countries.

Some people were enjoying food bought from stalls, while others were browsing souvenir shops selling pottery and textiles, which were local specialties. But what drew the most attention was the statue of the Living God, sitting majestically in the center of the city.

(I only passed by yesterday, so I couldn't get a good look at it...)

(Looking at it now, it's a spitting image of the real thing.)

Akatsuki: It's a tourist attraction. It's famous as a power spot where wishes come true.

Emma: Ah, that's why so many people are praying.

Akatsuki: You want to go too?

Emma: No... I'll pass.

(My wish is "to fall in love," so somehow I feel like I shouldn't pray to this statue.)

(...Really, it's just a feeling.)

Emma: So, what are we doing today?

Akatsuki: We're delivering an item that was requested.

Emma: So the Living God wasn't your only client?

Akatsuki: I have about 100 business partners in Tanzanite.

(That many...?)

Akatsuki: Sometimes I sell books, sometimes I exchange them for other books.

Akatsuki: Watch and learn.

Emma: Yes! I'll do my best to learn.

(This is completely different from looking after the shop. I have to work hard.)

Renewing my determination, I chased after the Owner's back as he walked ahead.

But I soon stopped in my tracks.

Akatsuki: ...Seems like something's happening.

Emma: ...!

The crowd gathered a short distance away was different from the others; they were buzzing with commotion.

Thanks to the Tanzanite soldiers, people were already starting to disperse, but through the thinning crowd, I could see a man with a swollen face.

Emma: He's badly injured. Was it a fight?

???: Something like that. It's been happening a lot lately.

(Ah, that voice...)

When I turned around, I saw Basil carrying a large amount of luggage, and Kamal, whose beauty, as always, was attracting attention.

Basil: I suspect a diviner misread the divine oracle.

Emma: What do you mean?

Basil: Divination in Tanzanite is considered to be the interpretation of the divine oracle, which reads the will of God from the stars.

Basil: Since Prince Azel is a God himself, his words directly become divine oracles...

Basil: Diviners are required to be skilled in how well they can interpret the will of God.

(Speaking of which...)

*flashback*

Azel: The basis of divination in our country is astrology.

Emma: Astrology...?

Azel: It's what you call astrology. What's popular here is unique to Tanzanite.

*back to present*

(Unique, so that's what he meant.)

Basil: However, it seems that many diviners have been misinterpreting the divine oracle lately...

Basil: Customers who are angry about the blasphemy against God sometimes lash out like that.

It was a logic I couldn't understand.

(I think divination is something that can be right sometimes and wrong sometimes.)

Emma: ...Are mistakes not allowed?

Basil: Well, divination is something that can change a person's life.

Basil: In this country, to call yourself a divinator, you need to have a certain level of resolution or preparedness.

(I guess I don't understand because I'm from another country.)

Basil: The idea that Prince Azel's thoughts are something that a mere divinator can read is preposterous.

I felt a shadow fall over Basil's face as he pushed up his glasses.

(Basil also has something on his mind, and that's dangerous!)

As he touched his glasses, the balance of his luggage was disrupted, and the Owner supported it with a speed invisible to the eye.

Basil: Oh dear, I'm so sorry! Thank you very much.

Akatsuki: Don't mind it. But, is this for a feast?

(I thought so too.)

The contents of Basil's luggage were a large quantity of groceries.

It was such an amount that it seemed difficult even to walk while looking ahead, and at least I wouldn't be able to carry it.

Basil: No, it's just an errand.

Basil: It certainly feels like there's more than usual, but I'm sure there's some noble reason for it.

("Noble reason" means it's an errand for Prince Azel, right?)

Only Basil was running the errand; Kamal was empty-handed.

When our eyes met, his long, beautiful fingers pulled out a letter.

The envelope was presented to the Owner.

Akatsuki: An additional order?

The Owner, who opened the seal on the spot, furrowed his brow at the letter he took out.

Emma: ...What's wrong?

Akatsuki: It says they found a clue to the book I was looking for.

Akatsuki: ...But it's suspicious.

Emma: Isn't that a good thing?

Akatsuki: If they were willing to tell me like this, they could have told me yesterday.

Akatsuki: Yet they deliberately contacted me later. And they're telling me to come and get the clue.

(...Indeed, I wonder if there's some intention behind it.)

Basil: Well, Prince Azel also apologized for that.

Basil: He said, "I accidentally forgot to tell you."

Akatsuki: .............

Akatsuki: In the first place, I don't have time to go get it for a while.

(I'm sure he has appointments to meet with his clients after this.)

(...But I think the information about the book is something the Owner desperately wants...)

(It might be rude to refuse the goodwill of a God.)

(Alright, this is where the assistant comes in.)

I raise my hand and volunteer to the Owner, who has a grim expression on his face.

Emma: Shall I go and get it?

-

Azel: My apologies… I am truly sorry.

Prince Azel warmly welcomed me when I visited his residence with Basil and Kamal, after parting ways with the Owner.

The way he emerged from the building with such perfect timing, as if he had foreseen everything, made me truly believe that he possesses some extraordinary power.

Azel: Thank you for your hard work, you two. Please bring the luggage inside.

Basil was frozen with his eyes sparkling, saying "H-huh..." Kamal grabbed him and pulled him inside.

(Now it's just the two of us.)

Emma: I've come on behalf of the Owner. I heard that you would give me a clue about the book...

Azel: Yes. I will give you a map.

Prince Azel turns his back to me and starts walking.

His eyes urge me to "follow me," so I follow him, but he's fast.

(Are his legs long, or is he just unusually fast...!)

I desperately chase after him, and as I follow Prince Azel through the uniquely shaped entrance---

Emma: ………… Huh?

I stop involuntarily, blink a few times, and pinch my cheeks.

It hurt like normal.

Azel: What's wrong?

Emma: No...

(Wh... what's going on here!?)

It was a shock, as if I had stepped into another world.

Unlike the weathered exterior walls, the interior was so neatly maintained that it didn't feel like it had 1000 years of history, and there was no sign of the precariousness that made it seem like it was about to collapse.

It's hard to say it was a brand new building, but the description of a "castle" truly suited it.

(I initially thought it was a solitary castle in the desert, and maybe I wasn't far off.)

Emma: The atmosphere is quite different from the exterior.

Azel: Of course, I can't just live in a 1000-year-old building as it is.

Azel: It's under major renovation right now.

Azel: The right side is mostly finished with renovations, so there's no problem, but the left side has partially collapsed.

Azel: If you happen to walk around here, never go to the left side.

Azel: If you do happen to enter it–

Emma: ...If I do?

Azel: Hehe.

(I'll be careful not to accidentally wander in there.)

Azel: Please be careful where you step.

Prince Azel goes up the stairs and proceeds to the right.

While chasing after him at a running pace, I casually glance to the left, and even though the sun should be directly overhead, it seems like a dim darkness lingers there.

(...I wonder if it's because the renovations aren't finished yet.)

After passing through the entrance hall, there's a corridor, which is also beautifully repaired.

At the end of the corridor where Prince Azel strode purposefully, there was a door.

Azel: Now, please come in.

Even though I was out of breath, I entered through the open door without a shred of suspicion... and found myself not in a guest room, but a kitchen.

(...Why?)

In the tidy room, the large amount of luggage that Basil had been carrying was carelessly placed. As I picked up a fruit that had rolled out of a bag, question marks popped up in my mind one after another.

Emma: Prince Azel... is the map in the kitchen?

Azel: Of course not, you idiot.

(!?)

(What? I just heard him speak like a different person...)

The door slams shut.

Prince Azel leaned against the closed door, blocking my escape route, and the corners of his mouth lifted.

Azel: Now, it's time for collection.

Emma: C-collection?

Azel: Here you go.

A letter, seemingly produced from thin air, is thrust in front of me.

Emma: This is...

I rub my eyes and look again.

No matter how many times I look at it, I can only read it as a "divination fee invoice."

Moreover, the numbers lined up on it were of an exorbitant amount that I had never seen before.

Emma: ...Is this addressed to me?

Azel: Yes, it's addressed to you.

Emma: I'm sorry, but I don't recall this.

Azel: Don't tell me you thought a God's divination was free?

Emma: ...Eh?

Azel: Wow, how rude. Don't underestimate me, okay?

(The divination from yesterday, it wasn't free!?)

I hurriedly pulled myself together as my senses started to fade.

Emma: But you said it was a thank you gift...!

Azel: There are many people who want to receive my divination but can't.

Azel: The thank you gift is the "right to receive divination."

Emma: You didn't say a word about that!

Azel: Well, it's common sense.

Emma: I don't know any such common sense!

Azel: Don't blame your ignorance on me.

(This is a scammer's tactic!?)

The me of yesterday, who thought he was a merciful and kind God – it seems I was seeing an illusion.

(Maybe this is his true nature.)

*flashback*

Clavis: But it's surprising. You're the current "Belle," and you're good at seeing through people's true nature, right?

Clavis: ...No, that's not right. Or rather, is it that impression precisely because you "saw through" it?

Clavis: Hmm, very interesting. I wonder if it's me who's seeing the illusion, or you.

*back to present*

(–That's what he meant. How pathetic of me, even though I'm Belle.)

Azel: Ah, but please rest assured. I'm not so cruel as to say "pay now."

Azel: We have two payment methods available: cash or labor.

(I can't feel assured at all.)

Azel: You don't seem to have any money, do you?

Azel: To repay this amount, you'll have to work like a slave...

Azel: Good luck.

His benevolent smile fueled my anger.

(Everyone's been deceived.)

(This person is not a merciful God at all. Rather...)

Emma: You, evil God!

Azel: Oh my, are those insults? As expected, a foreign girl is quite spirited.

Azel: But you see...

As I glared at him, Prince Azel grabbed my chin with his large hand–

Azel: Shall I show you what happens if you defy me?

.

.

.

Letter

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[lucabyte]

Different standards