#I mean I know it's just spam posting but still

[avaantares]

Tag yourself I'm Chiffon Prom Dress

Look, we all know Pinterest is a data-farming cesspit, and I usually block it from my image search results because I loathe it so much, but every once in a while I forget to exclude it and find something that's equal parts baffling and hilarious.

(IDs for the actors/dramas are in ALT, though one or two are from things I haven't seen so I don't know the titles. Feel free to add in the notes if you know them!)

[sainz100]

Carlos Sainz | F1 London Live in 2017 | x x x x x

[dazais-guardian-angel]

Okay but forreal, now more than ever I desperately NEED Aya to eventually wreck Fyodor's shit somehow. I already wanted her to get her revenge before, but I didn't think Fyodor would even remember or know who she was, and would massively underestimate her for that reason (just like Jouno knew that Fukuchi would underestimate her). But now the story has instead created this twisted, fucked-up dynamic between them, where Fyodor not only knows her, but is protective of her for reasons that are not his own: he has taken the pure, noble, kind, fatherly love motivating Bram to protect Aya and warped it into something horrific, vowing to protect her body only while not caring how much her heart and mind has been scarred, and claiming to be doing it for her own salvation, when he cannot possibly understand the selfless feelings Bram had that made him want to protect her and care for her — feelings that he does not have. He may genuinely have some sort of affection for children (the way he treated Karma, "blessings for the children", this), but it is twisted and hollow and is quite possibly only him unconsciously acting out the motions due to behavior instilled in him from the feelings of all the people he's subsumed in the past.

All this is to say that, now the narrative has specifically pitted Aya and Fyodor together as direct enemies: she not only had reason already to hate him because he killed Bram, but because he's also taken Bram's love for her and defiled it, dishonored it and him and all that he was; meanwhile, Fyodor has given himself an arch nemesis that he no doubt takes great pleasure in seeing how much she hates him/how much despair he's brought her, but paradoxically at the same time feels a compulsion to "protect" her that draws himself to her and that he can't ignore. Aya has to defeat him somehow (not permanently, mind you; Dazai will undoubtedly be his final end), and the setup for Bram being able to fight back enough to stop Fyodor from the inside with her help is all right there, too. Their love for each other is still enduring, stronger than ever, Fyodor is proof of that right now, and they will be able to defeat him together, at least enough that Bram can be freed and come back to Aya. Dazai told Fyodor that he would lose because he doesn't understand and underestimates the power of friendship bonds and love, and there is no better a time for that to happen than here, when he is literally using someone's strong love for and connection with someone (acting as that person and claiming to know how they feel and to be the same as them) in a way that he cannot understand, which will be his undoing.

[vanishintoyou]

can you guys tag your politics voting posts oh my fucking god im tired of seeing this on my dash

[lupucs]

Gosh I love your art!

But uh whats your favorite deltarune ships?

Thank you so much!! Oh gosh, you really caught me off guard with this one hah!

Well, uh I think it should be pretty obvious which ships I like by now...

It's clearly-

It-

It's obviously...

THOSE GUYS!

[fly-sky-high-bug-games]

This is only for folks who consider to reblog a artwork they like but are worried about it for what ever (and I do mean what ever) reason or don't know that reblogs are a common here:

This is a thumbs up 👍 that it's 100% alright for you to do that~ artists and writers would appreciate it, even!

[eterniityblooms]

updated my rules to include shipping info + a bit more about my monster muses specifically, since shipping with at LEAST one muse on this account is probably inevitable at some point

[an-aura-about-you]

you ever see a post where a person says a thing, another person says, "That's definitely not true," regarding the first post, and you actually DO remember the thing being true but it's such an inconsequential, niche thing that you know it's not worth it to make it an addition on that post?

[exeggcute]

none of this is new info, but you know I have the "loves to write lists and compile links" disposition, so I thought it might be helpful to share some of the tips I've seen about how to make sure you're sharing legitimate palestinian evacuation fundraisers and bundle all those tips into a single handy reference post.

this is a spreadsheet of legitimate ("vetted") fundraisers on tumblr.

this post explains how the people who maintain this spreadsheet confirm the legitimacy of each fundraiser they add.

this podcast episode ("yousef and the fourth move") explains why evacuation fundraisers are often organized by people who don't live in gaza and/or who may not be immediate relatives of the people trying to evacuate. it's part three of a series about a man named yousef and his family; parts one and two aren't required listening for part three to make sense, but if you have a few hours to spare then I wholeheartedly recommend listening to all of them.

this is the process that I personally have been using to check whether a particular fundraiser has been vetted:

spreadsheet method

open the vetted fundraisers spreadsheet.

inside this spreadsheet, open the "find..." menu. on a windows computer, this shortcut is ctrl+F. on a mac, this shortcut is cmd+F. on a mobile device, click the three dots menu in the upper right corner of your screen, then select Find and replace.

search for the last name of the person or family in the fundraiser. you may get several results because last names obviously aren't unique; keep hitting "next" until you've looked at all the results.

if you find an entry in the spreadsheet that has the exact same name and whose gofundme link leads to the same fundraiser associated with the blog, it's legitimate. if you don't find an entry in the spreadsheet that matches the blog's fundraiser, that does not mean it's a scam. try the next method below!

tumblr search method

copy the username of the tumblr who originally posted the fundraiser and/or sent you a message asking you to boost the fundraiser. (for example, username123)

paste this username into tumblr's search bar.

for best results, click the All types drop-down menu, then select Text. since the search page is often dominated by asks sent by username123 (which people then answer and tag with their username), this helps narrow things down a bit.

look to see if any people who are not username123 have made posts confirming that username123 is legitimate. this includes people who've reblogged fundraisers and added notes, people who've compiled masterlists, and people sharing hyperlinks to other posts confirming a fundraiser's legitimacy. if the message seems to be "yep, looks legit," then it's safe to assume it's legit.

this is not a comprehensive list, but here are some of the usernames I've seen associated with "yep, looks legit"-type posts and who I've come to trust by association. (disclaimers: I am not mutuals with any of the users, and not all of them do the vetting firsthand, but the ones who don't vet posts themselves still seem to be careful about what they share and therefore are a good lead to follow. also, don't bug these people to vet fundraisers for you unless they've specifically indicated that they're open to that.)

90-ghost

el-shab-hussein

nabulsi

appsa

northgazaupdates

retvolution

communistchilchuck

neptunerings

a-shade-of-blue

shimamitsu

neither of these methods yielded anything definitive; what now?

it may just be too early to tell. unless a trusted source has shared overwhelming evidence that a particular fundraiser is a scam (which seems to be a very very rare occurrence), the best thing you can do is ignore it. don't report their blog as spam, because there's a good chance it's a legitimate fundraiser who just hasn't been vetted yet.

[suiana]

nonchalant looking! yandere who turns out to be the most poetic, down bad, and obsessed man you've ever met.

he's a man of few words, really. doesn't approach anyone, not even you, and looks like he's perpetually annoyed. he'll give other people 'the look' and they'll scurry off, worried that they'll trigger his wrath (snide comments, the fattest side eyes...)

but the second you show him any kind of attention he switches up and... are you sure he's the same guy??? him??? the guy who HATES being in the surroundings of others???

"hi ☺️ you dropped your wallet."

"you are the most gorgeous work of art I've ever met, please bash my head into the wall."

he still won't approach you on his own accord - he's too nonchalant and mysterious like that. but... you'll see it. his affection, i mean.

sitting in the seat beside when he usually dips at the sight of people, offering you a pen if you've somehow forgotten yours, hell, maybe you'll even get him to cooperate in a group project. willingly. with a smile too. who knows? the possibilities are endless.

"oh! thank you for the tissue!"

"𝖞𝖔𝖚'𝖗𝖊 𝖜𝖊𝖑𝖈𝖔𝖒𝖊."

"...huh?"

have i mentioned he looks like a nonchalant guy? yeah, he's chillpilled nonchalant maxxed. you'd never catch him yearning. well, unless it's you and he's in a private place then yeah but otherise, nah. you bet his ass has a private spam account where he posts numerous posts about wanting you so bad he cries himself to sleep.

"is this yours?"

"no."

"it literally has your name on it."

"no that 1080p picture of you from your LinkedIn account with kiss marks and hearts drawn around your face as well as my name on the back does not belong to me. i do not know what you are talking about."

yeah, he's a really weird mix of nonchalant and chalant but hey! it's good for those who want a subtle yearner, am i right?

"beloved, i would very much appreciate it if you would step on my neck while degrading me on how disgusting it is to stalk your social media accounts because I'm too afraid to talk to you in person."

"man can't you just ask to be rejected like a normal person?"

[ipso-faculty]

There's now an Intersex Wiki! 🎉

So I got tired of the Sisyphean task of trying to make existing wikis like Wikipedia more informative about intersex. I also was feeling that there isn't really one central place for intersex content to get archived, especially if Tumblr goes down. It felt like it was time that we the intersex community had our own wiki.

And, it's live! You can find it at intersex.wiki!

It's still very young and under development, but we just passed the 100 article mark 🥳 and I thought I'd share! Here's our glossary page as a starting point:

It would be really lovely to get some more regular contributors to the wiki! If you have anything you'd like documented about your intersex variation, knowledge about intersex history, local intersex organizations, or intersex representation, it'd be appreciated! 💜

I've been mostly focusing on growing the number of articles, and which means that the main article on Intersex could really use some expansion and refinement. 💜

Proofreading is also appreciated. 💜

Please note that:

You will need to make an account and confirm your email before making any edits, because there is an intense amount of spam/vandalism directed at the wiki (sigh)

You must thoroughly cite all your sources. You can cite Wikipedia. You can cite Tumblr posts. You can even cite your own Tumblr posts. But you must cite your sources. This is an encyclopedia and others need to be able to verify the provenance of your arguments. We use Chicago-style citation.

Wiki content must have educational relevance to the intersex community, and also must be safe for work. (SFW is interpreted as including information about biology/anatomy provided it's in a style/tone suitable for a classroom.)

Note: we have a ban on biographies of living individuals.

The threshold for inclusion of neologisms and flags in the Wiki is: "is this actually used outside of coining posts, glossaries, and wiki entries?" If you want to make an article on a neologism, there needs to be at least one citation demonstrating literally anybody using this term in a naturalistic manner.

Given the wiki is subject to a lot of spam/vandalism, the first few edits you make to the wiki will be sent to a moderation queue and will need to be manually approved. Once you've demonstrated you're not a spammer, that you can cite sources, and not create articles that are outside the scope of the wiki, you'll be added to the list of users whose edits are automoderated.

If you have any difficulty in editing the wiki or getting started, or just wanna talk about the wiki, we have a Discord: https://discord.gg/BBvGUBWqnR

If you have any questions let me know! 💜

[koushirouizumi]

To the person I just blocked who Liked an old post of mine about Koushiros J.P.N V.A.:

When I checked your blog the very first post on it is a scam/spam post for the sun-glasses scam (a very old scam that first happened years ago and I'm very aware of). I was concerned your account was hacked, since that post was the newest on your page and from 2k21, so I blocked.

Please interact from an account that doesn't have scam posts on it, even old ones, thank you. You may want to also double check your own mutuals and people you messaged to make sure your account isn't sending them spam.

[biggianteggplant]

RANDOMLY THOUGHT ABT THIS IN THE SHOWER ALSO SORRY FOR SPAM POSTING POOKIES, EXAM WEEKS ARE COMING AND I MIGHT VANISH FOR A WHILE SO IM SPOILING YALL AS MUCH AS I CAN

DRUNKKKK

KUROO TETSURO

You and Kuroo had a bit of a fight earlier. Nothing explosive—just one of those quiet disagreements that start over something small and fester in silence. You snapped at him for always forgetting to put your laundry in when he does his, and he bit back with a “Maybe I forget because you act like I mess everything up.”

Ouch.

He left soon leaving you a message. “I’ll be home late. Out with the guys.” You heart-reacted his message but didn’t reply. You knew he only went drinking with the old Nekoma team to blow off steam—still, you didn’t love it. Not because you didn’t trust him. You just knew how sensitive Kuroo really was under all the dry sarcasm, and alcohol always made those feelings louder.

You sat curled up on the couch, hoodie sleeves over your hands. His hoodie. The one he always forgets he stole from you.

It’s nearing 11:30 when your phone rings. Yamamoto.

You pick up and he’s already chuckling.

“Hey, uhh… sorry to call so late. Kuroo’s, uh. He’s not wasted but he definitely just tried to use his credit card on a vending machine. Thought he bought you a ring.”

You blink.

“What?? Where is he?”

“At your building. He wanted to surprise you but we figured we should warn you so you’re not, like, alarmed by the sounds of him softly singing 'Baby Shark' in the hallway.”

You throw on slippers and hurry down, half-annoyed but mostly worried.

When you open the lobby door, there he is—sitting on the hallway floor with your cat keychain in his hands and your name on his lips. He looks up at you like the world just made sense again.

“There you are…” he breathes, like he hadn’t seen you in years. “I was scared you wouldn’t come. Yamamoto said you’d probably still be mad. I told him you always come for me.”

You kneel down, and he leans forward, his head pressing against your shoulder. He’s warm and smells faintly like citrus soju and a hint of your shampoo—he used your bottle again, the one you told him to stop hogging.

“M’ sorry…” he murmurs. “For being a jerk earlier. I just—I suck at fights with you. I get defensive. And I shouldn’t. You’re right.”

You sigh, running your fingers through his messy hair.

“It’s okay. I was mean too. I know you didn’t mean it.”

��Still…” he sits up, blinking at you like he’s trying very hard to focus. “Can we not go to sleep mad? Even if I smell like… regret and lemon?”

You nod and hold out your hand. He smiles like it’s the best thing anyone’s ever done for him.

—

Back in your apartment, he curls up next to you on the couch, burying his face into the hoodie he’s wearing.

“Hey…” he says sleepily. “I just realized this is your hoodie.”

You raise an eyebrow. “Yeah. The one you ‘accidentally’ took like a month ago.”

“Mm. That’s why it smells like comfort.” He tightens his hold around you. “Wanna wear it together. Forever. Hoodie marriage.”

You laugh softly. “That’s not a thing.”

“It is now. You’re stuck with me, hoodie and all.”

His breathing slows, one arm lazily draped around your waist, thumb brushing over your shirt like he needs to keep touching you or you’ll vanish.

“Love you,” he murmurs.

“Love you too,” you whisper back.

“…Even if you fight like a crab.”

You roll your eyes. But your fingers find his under the blanket, and you hold on.

Just like always.

BOKUTO KOUTARO

Bokuto doesn’t drink often.

Not because he can’t handle it—but because when he does, he goes all in. Like “suddenly poetic about sunsets” all in. So when he shows up to the MSBY boys' night with sleeves rolled up, a determined look in his eyes, and says:

“Let’s get drinks. I’m drinking tonight.”

Everyone immediately knows something is off.

Atsumu raises an eyebrow. “Bro, you don’t even like the taste of beer.”

Bokuto shrugs, already downing his first soju shot with the bitterness of betrayal written on his face.

“I saw a guy ask for Y/N’s number today.”

Silence.

Sakusa blinks. “Did she give it to him?”

“No!” Bokuto shouts, loud enough for the bar to turn their heads. “She told him no! She said, ‘Sorry, I’m taken,’ and then he looked at her like she was lying!”

“Okay, so…” Hinata asks cautiously. “Why are you drinking then?”

Bokuto slams his second shot.

“Because she called me a little sensitive about it!!”

The MSBY team collectively sighs. Here it goes again.

Fast forward an hour and Bokuto is tipsy-talking with the passionate intensity of a man who would write your name in the sky if he could.

“Y/N is so pretty,” he mumbles to no one in particular, chin resting on the table. “Like, not just pretty. Soul-pretty. And she always laughs at my jokes even when they’re not that funny, and she puts extra cheese on my ramen, and she lets me wear her socks when mine disappear—I LOVE HER SO MUCH—”

“WE KNOW,” the table groans.

Atsumu, sipping his beer like it’s holy water, mutters, “Every damn time he drinks, it’s like watching a rom-com with a protein shake.”

Even Sakusa, in his usual cool monotone, looks vaguely disturbed.

“I’m happy for him but I’m also very tired.”

Bokuto, absolutely unbothered, points at all of them.

“You’re just jealous ‘cause I get forehead kisses and you don’t.”

Hinata grins. “Okay, he’s got a point.”

Meanwhile, you get a call around midnight.

“Hi babe,” Bokuto says sweetly, “Can you come pick me up? I drank because I was jealous but I’m not mad anymore. I just wanna cuddle and tell you you’re my favorite human until I pass out.”

You sigh, heart warm.

“I told you he was just a random guy, Kou. You really didn’t have to get drunk over it.”

“But you’re mine,” he slurs softly. “And I get nervous sometimes. You’re… y’know… you.”

“I love you,” you say quietly. “Even when you’re a tiny bit sensitive.”

He giggles. “Told you.”

When you arrive, Bokuto throws himself into your arms dramatically, mumbling into your shoulder:

“I’m not drunk. I’m in love.”

You look up to see the MSBY team watching from the table, visibly exhausted.

Atsumu: “Please. Take your owl. He’s been reciting your contact name like it’s poetry.”

KENMA KOZUME

You weren’t expecting company tonight. At all.

So when someone starts knocking at your door like they own the place, you open it with a half-annoyed sigh—only to find Kuroo Tetsuro standing there with a smugness so dense, it could fuel a small city.

He’s got one hand steadying Kenma, who looks both sleepy and mildly done with existence.

Kuroo, grinning like he just delivered a cursed artifact, says:

“Your package has arrived. Handle with care—might bite if threatened.”

Kenma lets out the softest sigh and leans forward into your arms without hesitation, nearly knocking you off balance.

Kuroo claps you on the back with zero shame.

“That grin?” he nods toward himself. “Yeah, it screams ‘I know he’s not affectionate, so consider this a gift.’ You’re welcome.”

Before you can reply, he’s already walking away, hands in his pockets, humming some dramatic villain theme.

“Good luck with him. He’s in full cling-mode. I call it Kenmess™.”

The door closes. Silence. You look down at the human cat blanket now half-draped over you.

“Okay,” you mutter. “Let’s get you to the couch, Kenmess.”

He makes a small, pleased sound like a warm riceball and clings tighter.

Once you finally get him settled, you grab a warm cloth from the bathroom and come back to wipe his face gently. You’re expecting sleepy mumbles at most.

You’re not expecting him to say

“I like your hands.”

You freeze.

“What?”

“They make my head stop buzzing.”

You pause the cloth mid-wipe. What is happening?

“Also,” he adds, blinking up at you, “you always make me feel safe. Like… even when I’m annoying. Which I probably am. But you never make me feel like a bother.”

Your entire brain short-circuits.

“Are you—okay?”

“I’m awesome,” he slurs softly. “I’m just being honest. You’re my favorite person. Like. In the whole server.”

“Did you just call our relationship a server—?”

“Ban anyone who flirts with you,” he mumbles, eyes fluttering shut, “They’re NPCs anyway…”

He reaches out and pulls you down beside him, his arms wrapped around your waist with alarming strength for someone who just drank three sojus because Kuroo annoyed him into it.

You try not to combust.

“You’re being dramatic.”

“I’m being real,” he counters sleepily. “Let me keep you for the night. Recharge my social battery. Please.”

You give in. Of course you do. You tuck the blanket over both of you and feel his grip around you relax just slightly.

Before he passes out completely, he mutters:

“Tell Kuroo he’s still a menace. But thanks for the drop-off.”

AKAASHI KEIJI

It’s a quiet celebration. Akaashi and a few of his coworkers are out drinking after hitting a big milestone—finally submitting the last round of edits for a project that’s been haunting their backs for weeks. There’s laughter, clinking glasses, small talk—but Akaashi?

Akaashi’s silent.

He’s nursing a glass of plum wine, sitting off to the side in a booth like he’s physically present but mentally curled up in your hoodie on your couch.

And that’s when Tenma Udai—half-tipsy, half-wise—leans over, squinting.

“You good, Akaashi?”

No response.

Akaashi just stares into his drink like it holds answers. Then slowly, quietly, his shoulders start to shake.

Tenma blinks. Oh.

“...are you crying?”

Akaashi lets out a very soft, “Just a little,” like it’s the weather or something.

Tenma sighs, already smiling. Here we go.

“Let me guess… girlfriend withdrawal?”

Akaashi nods solemnly, bottom lip wobbling. His voice is barely above a whisper.

“Five hours.”

“Damn. A whole five.”

“She makes me food,” Akaashi mutters. “Like… actual meals. Even cuts the bread weird so it’s fun to eat.”

“Mhm.”

“And massages my back when I get stiff from writing too long.”

“Very kind.”

“She kisses me on the forehead like I’m a baby.”

“You do give off baby energy sometimes.”

Akaashi glares through his teary lashes.

“Shut up.”

Tenma chuckles, waving him off.

“Young love. It’s cute.”

Akaashi sniffles and pulls out his phone, unlocking it to your name on speed dial. You’re listed as EMERGENCY CONTACT in all caps, with a little heart.

“I think I should call her.”

“You think she’ll pick up?”

“She always does.”

And sure enough, your phone buzzes—and you answer on the third ring, voice soft with surprise.

“Keiji? Is everything okay?”

His voice cracks a little:

“Can I come home now?”

---

You’re in your comfiest pajamas, watching F.R.I.E.N.D.S when the doorbell rings.

You already know who it is.

You open the door slowly and there he is — Akaashi Keiji, looking like he ran through three stages of heartbreak, an existential crisis, and a Pinterest board of “Soft Boy Autumn.”

His hair’s slightly tousled, eyes a little red, and in his hands? A crumpled convenience store bag full of the most random—but specifically your favorite—snacks.

He holds the bag out like a peace offering.

“Hi,” he says, sheepish. “I missed you.”

You blink. “You’re drunk.”

“Not really.” (He is. But it’s the soft, sleepy, too-much-thinking kind.)

You step aside and he walks in slowly like he’s entering a sacred space. The second the door closes behind him, he wraps his arms around your waist and just… melts into you.

His forehead presses to your shoulder.

“Five hours,” he mumbles.

You giggle softly. “I know.”

“Do you know how long that is?”

“A little over 300 minutes?”

“It felt like years.”

You wrap your arms around him and run your fingers through his hair gently. He sighs so deeply you feel it in your spine.

“Everyone was talking and laughing and I just kept thinking…” sniff “…what if you’re cold right now and I’m not there to give you my hoodie?”

You laugh again, pulling away to cup his cheeks.

“You’re so dramatic.”

“Only for you.”

You guide him to the couch where he immediately plops down with his head in your lap, mumbling something about your thighs being the only acceptable pillow.

You grab the bag of snacks and go through them.

“You got me honey butter chips, banana milk, and… a single boiled egg?”

He shrugs.

“That’s love.”

“That’s concerning.”

He closes his eyes, content and clinging to your waist.

“I don’t care if I’m clingy,” he murmurs. “I don’t wanna be cool tonight. I just wanna be yours.”

You lean down and kiss his forehead.

“You always are.”

[foursidecity]

Anyways I think everyone should go watch win or lose, I feel like 90% of what I'm seeing is posts about how they censored a trans character and 10% of people actually praising the show for what it COULD do with what they are given, im not saying disney didn't do a bad or whatever, but it's one thing to to recognize the failings of a greedy corporate entity, and another to completly ignore and degrade the writers and artist that poured their souls into this series and that character

Here's what DIDNT happen:

-Disney didn't remove the trans plot line because of the election, theyre just like that. Theyve done it before theyll do it again regardless of the political climate, don't blame this on trump, blame it on network execs<<this is a fairly new take and it's so stupid. Animation takes time and the editing was done a year before the show released

-the character is still in the show, and will have her own episode still in the next batch of episodes released, we really don't know much information about her now still, and I'm holding out hope theirs even a small refrence to the original storyboard/script. But really at this point we just don't know how much has changed

-disney stepped in, pixar had nothing to do with the changes, only pointing this out because the writers at pixar obviously wanted this character to happen, but disney didn't want that story to be told on their platform, it's important to. You know, know your enemy and not just point fingers at everyone in the vacinity

-Chanel Stewart voiced Kai and is a trans voice actress, I don't see alot of people mentioning her and you should, she put alot into this character and was obviously really upset when her story was changed

This post isn't about letting disney off the hook, by all means pirate it, I actually encourage you to! But how often do you get an animated show about co-ed sports? That's something in it's own right that I'm amazed they were even able to keep in script, how often do writers get to try to make trans storylines that resonate with and include trans people? Even if it didn't go through, we know about it, talk about it!! Spamming 'fuck disney!!!' Under every pixar post isn't doing anything

[httpsserene]

𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐡𝐨𝐧𝐨𝐫, 𝐡𝐞'𝐬 𝐚 𝐬𝐢𝐦𝐩 | 𝐦𝐯. 𝟏

summary: an unplanned hard launch reveals more than a relationship. it exposes the biggest simp of the century.

content warning: requested by @animeandf1lover. fluff. crack adjacent (in the beginning). profanity. bestfriend!logan sargeant. boyfriend!max verstappen. humor. max yap-stappen. jimmy and sassy verstappen. my personal hc of max using cat emojis unironically. no part two requests, please!

pairing: max verstappen x hijabi fem!poc!reader (fc: shahdbatal)

genre: smau.

from, serene: other titles i thought of; simp, i love my gf, down bad, lord of the simps, or president of the simp club. haven't written for max alone in a while, i missed him !!! pls ignore the typos on the interview clips otherwise i will cry. enjoy, lovely’s xxx

⌕ join taglist | feedback & requests | upcoming chapters | table of contents ↻

instagram • jimmyandsassy 🔒 • monte carlo ⚑

liked by yninsta, maxverstappen1, logansargeant, and 123 others

jimmyandsassy love life

view comments

maxverstappen1: how are you going to caption this "love life" when there's not a single photo of me in it 😕

➥ maxverstappen1: you called me the love of your life this morning on ft 😔 ➥ maxverstappen1: omg are you breaking up with me and taking the cats with you 😭😭😭 ➥ yninsta: max the cats chose the caption not me!!! ➥ yninsta: you're still the loml baby, i'm not going anywhere 😚💙 ➥ danielricciardo: u guys are perfectly made for each other :)

maxverstappen1: my babies 😻 why did you put mommy on the last slide? she's too pretty to be there!

➥ jimmyandsassy: m prettier than mommy - sassy ➥ maxverstappen1: hey! you get your looks from your mother be nice 😠 ➥ charlesleclerc: max mate 😟 with every comment you make on this account i hope you know i think less of you with each one 🙏🏻 ➥ alexandrasaintmleux: he's only saying this because i told him it would be cute to make a priv acct with leo that's like this! ➥ yninsta: you should! the kitties love it :) ➥ charlesleclerc: you're all mentally disturbed. electric chair⚡️🪑

logansargeant: i have post notifications on and i have no clue how max gets here faster than me.

➥ logansargeant: jimmy? sassy? do you tell him when you're about to post 🧐 ➥ maxverstappen1: logan the cats can't speak english or use a phone be serious. ➥ logansargeant: THEY DON'T HAVE OPPOSABLE THUMBS EITHER BUT THEY STILL POST AND REPLY TO COMMENTS ➥ jimmyandsassy: don't yell at daddy! 's mean - jimmy ➥ maxverstappen1: yeah logan don't yell at daddy 😌 ➥ logansargeant: can't believe there was a time i thought you were a respectable man smh

roscoelovecoco: cool cats 🐈

➥ jimmyandsassy: big dawg 🐶

landonorris: they're so pretty i just wanna pet them

➥ landonorris: i wished cats liked me,,, ➥ jimmyandsassy: nobody likes you! hope this helps - sassy ➥ landonorris: STOP HIDING BEHIND YOUR CATS AND COME FIGHT ME SIS 🤬🤺

alexalbon: please don't kill me :)

➥ jimmyandsassy: why would we kill you? we like alex - jimmy ➥ oscarpiastri: oh they're so going to claw your eyes out mate 😂 ➥ georgerussell63: it's been nice knowing you alex 🙂 ➥ charlesleclerc: fly high alexander 🕊️🙏🏻 ➥ schecoperez: gone too soon 🙂‍↔️ ➥ jensonbutton: if she kills you, logan will have a car to race this weekend. she's so going to get rid of you 😈 ➥ yninsta: what. logan has his own williams? are u guys okay???

twitter • yn's spam twt

igstory • yninsta uploaded to close friends story!

[caption1; guess i'm bringing jimmy with me][caption2; target confirmed. bravo six going dark.]

logansargeant: please don't make my team principal disappear ⤷yninsta: i will make him suffer inshallah 🙏🏽 ⤷logansargeant: think about jimmy and sassy! they'll miss you 😢 ⤷yninsta: ,,,i will subject him to a painful lecture about his mishandling of the race weekend ⤷yninsta: instead of death 🙃

alexalbon: are we chill? ⤷yninsta: i have no quarrel with you 👍🏽 ⤷alexalbon: oh thank god. i was going crazy in my room hiding from you 😮‍💨

maxverstappen1: come to me when you're done with james 😽 ⤷maxverstappen1: you're surrounded by the wrong shade of blue :( ⤷maxverstappen1: how's logan doing? ⤷yninsta: he's okay considering they gave his car away. ⤷maxverstappen1: bring him with you, i will tell him exactly what i think about wiliams treating him that way

f1 twitter

FIA press conference: pre-race australia • max, charles, logan, zhou, yuki

post-race interview clips • max verstappen

twitter • the internet reacts

instagram • logansargeant • melbourne ⚑

liked by oscarpiastri, yninsta, redbullracing and 546,789 others

logansargeant me and you, and you and me, just us, and your boyfriend max.

tagged: yninsta, maxverstappen1, betterhelp

view comments

maxverstappen1: you have me saved as “yn’s boyfriend - INGORE 🛑❌🙈”

➥ maxverstappen1: that’s not very nice ☹️ ➥ yninsta: logan! change it before you make him sad ➥ logansargeant: fine 🙄 ➥ logansargeant: i’m going to mute him instead.

➥ yninsta: logan and max get along great guys i promise!

➥ yninsta: max asked him if he was okay with asking me out before our first date and logan said “mate you don’t have to ask, i know you’ll treat her right” 😇 ➥ logansargeant: that is NOT public info‼️ delete pls ➥ maxverstappen1: you didn’t have to say any of this schatje 😅 ➥ user1: max asked logan for permission to date her? what in the wattpad fanfic is happening rn ➥ georgerussell63: this is great blackmail- i mean info 😉

oscarpiastri: acting like you hate max but you called me screaming in joy about playing padel with him 💀

➥ logansargeant: oscar please. my reputation is at stake here 😀 ➥ oscarpiastri: hey instagram comments- i misspoke. logan sargeant HATES max verstappen! that’s all, thanks. ➥ user2: dis guy 🤦🏻‍♀️ ➥ user3: osc sarcasm check: ✅

user4: if max verstappen offered to fly me out to hang out with his gf i would not leave his messages on read ijs 🤷🏼

alexalbon: DAMN he even said please 😶

➥ yninsta: not too much now alex 🤫 ➥ alexalbon: 🤐😳 ➥ user5: alex were u silent or sileNCED ➥ user6: i could feel the threat through the screen

jensonbutton: but did you take him up on his offer? that’s what we need to know!

➥ maxverstappen1: he did. left me on read for 6 minutes before he broke 😹 ➥ logansargeant: it was on his private jet, paid for, and i got to see my best friend- ofc i said yes! i’m not stupid.

user7: tagging betterhelp on the sc of max’s desperate ass texts is NASTY work logan 💀💀💀

➥ user8: nothing wrong with sending the homies links to therapy sites ➥ user9: there’s definitely something wrong with how down bad max is for his girl. i know that much 🥴 ➥ user10: are u srs? bc that’s a man who doesn’t play about his woman! i can tell 😵‍💫🫦

instagram • maxverstappen1

liked by yninsta, redbullracing, danielricciardo and 2,126,989 others

maxverstappen1 championships are worth winning because i take the trophies back to her.

tagged: yninsta

view comments

yninsta: championships are worth winning because YOU drove like crazy for them.

➥ maxverstappen1: two things can be true at the same time 💙 ➥ maxverstappen1: i don’t know if they would matter as much if i didn’t have anyone to praise me for it. ➥ yninsta: i’ll convince you that they are more than that one day 💙🔒 (good thing i’m never leaving you x)

yninsta: حب حياتي (the love of my life)

➥ maxverstappen1: no you are mine ☺️🤭

user11: no the fuck he didn’t.

➥ user12: GIRL HE FUCKING DID

user13: nahhhh he got it. he got it all.

➥ user13: championships, monaco living, the finest woman, expensive cats and cars—LIKE LEAVE SOMETHING FOR THE COMMON FOLK MAX ➥ maxverstappen1: my bad 🙂‍↕️ ➥ user14: he don’t even mean ts ➥ user15: oh i’m bout to crash out 🤪🤬👹

charlesleclerc: okay. that’s a good caption 🙂

➥ maxverstappen1: take a deep breath charlie, no need to be angy about it :) ➥ charlesleclerc: i knew you’d ruin it. i’ll be seeing you max 🤫 ➥ user16: yo what tf 🤣 ➥ user17: did charles leclerc just ominously imply his plot for max’s demise?! ➥ user18: bro what 😒 @/user17 ➥ user19: what are you gonna say next? “they’re going to participate in a duel of arms 🤓” ➥ user16: “a battle of fisticuffs, more likely it seems 🤓🤓🤓”

user20: oh my days— she’s beautiful 😦

➥ maxverstappen1: she’s the prettiest woman i’ve ever set my eyes on 😊 ➥ user21: don’t worry max, we believe you! ➥ user22: you truly are blessed to be dating her.

danielricciardo: boys what are you’re wagers? max yaps more/less about his gf to us now that they’re public?

➥ landonorris: more +£500 ➥ lewishamilton: more +£1000 ➥ logansargeant: more +(i’ll match lewis in american) ➥ schecoperez: have faith in max! ➥ schecoperez: +5 grand take it or leave it.

user23: she’s majestic! in that first photo, she’s giving padme from star wars 🤩 beautiful!!!!

➥ yninsta: tysm ☺️ this might be the best compliment i’ve ever received !!!

instagram • ynspamacct

liked by maxverstappen, lilymhe, charlesleclerc and 893,430 others

ynspamacct i won't unprivate my main, but here's the bf max content i know you all want :)

tagged: maxverstappen1

view comments

user24: max said: princess treatment only 👏🏻

➥ maxverstappen1: ***queen treatment 👸🏽 ➥ user25: oh. the simp allegations are true. ➥ maxverstappen1: you doubted how much i love my gf? crazy. ➥ user25: i won't do it again, i promise.

logansargeant: why do you wear heels if you know they’re going to make your feet hurt?

➥ maxverstappen1: bc she’s knows i’m going to hold them for her and carry her home 😌 ➥ ynspamacct: bc i feel tall 🥺 and max doesn’t mind carrying me home !!! ➥ ynspamacct: oops ☺️ we must’ve replied at the same time hahaaa user26: i’m going to slam my head into the nearest wall, viciously. ➥ ynspamacct: don’t do that! life is worth living i promise 😰

user26: first photo made my tummy flip for some reason 🫦🥴🤤

➥ ynspamacct: you should see a doctor! that doesn’t sound healthy :) ➥ user27: u better stop thirsting over her man like that 😳

lilymhe: boundaries 🧘🏻‍♀️💆🏻‍♀️

ynspamacct: exactly 😌

user27: breakfast in bed…what did he want from you 🤔

➥ ynspamacct: …nothing? or, just quality time i guess! he’s sweet like that 🥰 user27: ,,,i didn’t know that was an option. ➥ ynspamacct: being treated like a queen comes with accepting that’s how you deserve to be treated, and that it’s the *only* way you’re going to be treated 😚 ➥ user28: SPEAK ON IT MY GOOD SIS 😫

user29: this relationship is dear to me 😪

user30: m-men aren’t shit? who knew that was possible.

➥ user31: i thought all we had was tom holland 💀 ➥ maxverstappen1: i’m honored to be added to the roster ➥ user32: i cannot take this man seriously now. ➥ user33: why bc he loves his gf and you can’t even seem to find the way to a shower or a therapy session 😀 ➥ user34: WOAH VIOLATION

yninsta: max, maxie-max, maxie !!!

➥ maxverstappen1: i love you most, schatje 💛🔒 ➥ yninsta: aw you beat me to it 😞 ➥ yninsta: i love you foreverrrr #1 💙🔒 ➥ user35: oh i’m gonna cry :)

© httpsserene 2024 - most photos from pinterest and edited by me. fc is shahdbatal.

[pixiesndberries]

𝐃𝐄𝐀𝐑 𝐅𝐔𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐄 𝐇𝐔𝐒𝐁𝐀𝐍𝐃, 𝐉𝐉𝐊 𝐌𝐄𝐍 —

a small series of Jujutsu Kaisen men as your husband !

☆ OUR STARS : Gojo Satoru, Nanami Kento, Geto Suguru, Choso Kamo, Aoi Todo, Toji Fushiguro, and more !

━ REQUESTED BY : none

━⁠ WARNINGS : none

ෆ PIXIE'S NOTE ! : were back again at daily posting 🙏🏻 to my pookies who supported me, y'all made me giggle and kickin' my feet in my bed last night 👉🏻👈🏻 love lots!

GOJO SATORU, as your husband !

• Gojo being your husband is no different from being your boyfriend — he still gotta be that same person you dated few years ago, though he became more serious about situations and decisions because you guys are married but his goofy, annoying, clingy side is still there — I mean when he met you and been with you for like two weeks your caller name is already set as 'wifey'.

Gojo who totally acts like a mom when you leave for work, he is like a freaking HOUSEWIFE —

"honey!" he sings as he walks into the living room seeing you brush your hair Infront of the mirror, getting ready for work. "hmm?" you responded and quickly turns your head at him — he's wearing a this is what an awesome husband looks like apron which made you too stunned to speak, "I created a bento for you." he smiles as he hands out a nicely wrapped bento box which was really new to you because it's always you who keep creating bentos for him, usually when he leaves for a mission.

"thank you, honey." you say softly with a warm smile as you accept his bento that he specially created for you, he can't help but to feel like a love sick teenager seeing you smile like that. He officially takes the position of being a housewife 🫡

Gojo who couldn't stop talking about the future he wants with you like nonstop — this man would talk about having three million carbon copy of him with you and would name them after megumi, yuji, nanami and basically all of his friends, students, and dead relatives 🏃🏻‍♀️💨 — I FEEL LIKE HE GOTTA BE THAT TYPE OF PERSON.

Gojo always flexes you everyday and YOU are his hyper fixation — argue with the wall, he gotta be the type of man to say "she's my wife." randomly when he's talking to an old friend he haven't seen for a long time. HE WILL BE THE HUSBAND WHO YOU WILL SEE WEARING "I LOVE MY WIFE" TYPE OF SHIRT WITH THE UGLIEST FONT AND PHOTO TEMPLATE EVER. Once a person mentions your name he ain't gonna shut the fuck up.

I just know this marriage go'n be like Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively's relationship 🙏🏻 ABSOLUTELY RANDOM TEXTS FROM HIM, UPDATING YOU TOO MUCH.

2:32 pm

gojo : shitting at the mall cuz i don't have anywhere to shit on.

gojo : [sent an attachment]

gojo : i miss you my wife, my beautiful wife.

gojo : [sent an attachment]

gojo : [sent an attachment]

gojo : your very handsome husband ❤️

2:40 pm

you : stop spamming me messages love, im at work 🙏🏻

gojo : why? is it turning you on 😏

you : that's a photo of your feet.

Gojo who became a seriously hands on person when you told him that you're pregnant — when he has missions with yuji, megumi, or maybe nobara and you told him that you're very tired to do anything today he will be like,"okay kids, I got to go I have important things to do." and dashed away before they could say something and mf arrived at yalls house within a second.

Gojo who cried when he carry his baby for the first time, he was sobbing like hell — girl dad? boy dad? BRO HE IS BOTH ‼️ "okay we'll name this one suguru and this one-" he is going to come up with the most ridiculous names, probably the worst one was his dead ancestor.

okay seriously, Gojo would be a full time dad after his children were born — he will always stay at home as much as he can, having twins isn't easy plus he's trying to help you with his full power and make sure you don't feel alone through this.

"gojo.." you grumble as you felt his presence disappearing next to you at bed, you open your eyes and sees he wasn't there which led you to stand up and start looking for him — you walk out of the bedroom and noticed that the twin's bedroom door was open so you check it out.

in your suprise, gojo was in the rocking chair with the twin's in his arms peacefully sleeping and he is snoring like hell. You can't help but smile seeing this moment, it warms you heart. You quickly grabbed your phone and took a quick photo, this is what you exactly wished for.

Gojo who couldn't stop posting you and his little angels and his fans are absolutely living for it, it's like his day wouldn't complete without posting cute photos of his angels and of course, you as well. Gojo is indeed a Facebook mom —

; gojosatoru

tagged : @y/n.instagram | fam time 🤍 !

liked by megumi.22 and 8,957 others

itaaa.yuji | I volunteer as a tribute to babysit them 🫡

nobaraaa | CUTIES.

shokoleiri.7 | adorbs

─ REBLOGS, LIKES, AND COMMENTS ARE APPRECIATED FEEL FREE TO REQUEST!