#I loved writing this actually. My ideas aren’t spectacular but heck it I like sharing them!

[captain-astors]

H, J, and P?

H - What is your favorite source text for fandom stuff (e.g., TV shows, movies, books, anime, Western animation, etc.)?: It really depends on what I’ve heard, but typically I prefer to read the manga if I really care about the story/want to get through it faster! However there are some cases like Land of the Lustrous or Jujutsu Kaisen where the animation is so good that I start with what’s out of the anime, then go back and read it to ensure I don’t miss any details. Or alternatively, I go to the anime if I just want it as a background story while I draw. I’ve been doing that with Attack on Titan recently, it was a lot better than I anticipated so I presume the general negative opinion I’ve heard derived from its overpopularity not the quality itself? Or maybe it gets really problematic or something, haven’t finished it yet. As for Movies Vs. Books it’s a similar situation, but I prefer books more generally.

J - Name a fandom you didn’t think about until tumblr: Honestly, I’ve been introduced to a good portion of my recent fandoms by a friend of mine first, and then convinced to actually start them by tumblr art/my mutuals (mostly Quinn) so if I had to think of something that was genuinely introduced to me here… Good Omens? Haven’t watched it but I see them on my dash constantly. Oh also Witch Hat Atelier!

P - Invent a random AU for any fandom (we always need more ideas): Tokyo Ghoul obviously,

maybe an AU where all the folks pulling strings and playing king (Arima, Kaneki, Furuta, Eto) somehow end up in a very uneasy alliance to take down V for good. They argue over the ultimate goal constantly, they all hate at least two of the others, nothing’s really going well but they do get stuff done… somewhat, but they hate each other’s methods and tend to end up fighting after ever decision, and very rarely consulting each other before. The only thing keeping them united is a common goal and wanting to die.

AU where Haise is sent with the Quinx to deal with Noro instead of capturing Shuu on the roof. Shirazu doesn’t die, neither does Kanae (unless Eto decides to dispose of them?) but also, Haise never stops dreaming. But, a King is needed anyways and thus he ends up tentatively playing the role despite shironeki continuing to insist he be let out. I thought this one up right now and I haven’t considered consequences to this yet, but I like it as a concept.

Don’t think I’m inventing this but, AU where someone, legitimately anyone, comes to rescue Kaneki in time, hopefully helping him steer away from the mindset of “No one is able to help me”

AU where Juuzou and Hanbee are a little too effective and end up actually killing Kaneki (or injuring him to the point where he’s unable to dragon-ify even after taking a bite out of Hajime, leaving him only with the strength to flee) effectively throwing a wrench in everyone’s plans.

Not an AU but do you ever think about the fact that every single crucial event in Tokyo Ghoul wouldn’t have happened if Tsuneyoshi was just actually a good dad.

AU where everyone has actually decent parents (This one’s a joke but I actually cannot conceive of it.)

AU were Hide, Kimi, or someone else is the person to get Ghoul’d instead of Kaneki and the consequences thereof.

Very self-indulgent AU where Koori gets kidnapped by Aogiri instead of/in addition to Amon or Takizawa (mostly just writing this here because I’d like to draw it maybe, thematically I’m not really even sure it would work for him to begin with, but I like drawing theoretical ghouls.)

Also not really inventing this but I’d also like to draw a Pokémon AU some time.

[aroworlds]

Aro-Spec Artist Profile: Sebastian

Our next aro-spec creator is Sebastian, better known on Tumblr as @gloriousmonsters and @mangledmouth!

Sebastian is a bisexual, autistic, aromantic trans man who is single-handedly covering many literary bases in producing original aro and queer short stories, novels and poetry. Aside from his Tumblr blogs, you can find and support more of his work at his Patreon. If you have a dollar or two you’re wanting to invest in worthy aro-spec talent on a less-regular basis, please take a look at Sebastian’s Ko-Fi!

With us Sebastian talks about identifying with the role of villainy in narrative as an aro creative, aromantic characters and grand emotional gesture, the divide between representation and self-expression, and some spectacular-sounding work-in-progress book titles! His investment in aromantic characters and characterisation shapes every word, so please let’s give him all our love, encouragement, gratitude, kudos and follows for taking the time to explore what it is to be aromantic and creative.

Can you share with us your story in being aro-spec?

It took me a while to realize I was aromantic, but it was one of the things that made me go ‘oh, that makes … a lot of sense’ when I looked back at my childhood. I was a weird, isolated kid, so I didn’t learn from bouncing off other children; I learned through stories.

One of my strongest early memories is of watching a poorly made Red Riding Hood film over and over again, belting out the lyrics to the (poorly written) villain’s song, called ‘Man Without A Heart’. Cut to a year or so later, watching the Rodgers and Hammerstein Cinderella (still the best Cinderella, IMO), I was utterly fascinated by the villainess singing: ‘Falling in love with love is falling for make-believe…’

I didn’t know, that early, that I didn’t feel romantic love. Not consciously. But there was something utterly, obsessively interesting about villains that sneered at love, who were called heartless, who challenged the narrative that there must always be a love story and it must come out right no matter what. I felt, on a deep level, that these people were like me somehow. The additional queercoding and common side-helping of mental illness helped - or didn’t help, depending on your perspective. I grew up knowing, deep down, what my part in life was: I was the villain.

When I hit my rebellious age, it first came out by my saying, ‘But being a villain doesn’t mean you have to be wrong or unhappy’. I began collecting villains like nobody’s business, and writing stories that more and more often centered people whose character types I’d only ever seen as villains. And from there we arrive at today!

Are there any particular ways your aro-spec experience is expressed in your art?

Recently, my brother (who is my sounding board for a lot of stories, as I am for him) looked at my books-to-write list and said, ‘Nearly every idea you have is a deconstructed romance or strong non-romantic relationship.’

I love strong relationships, so I originally thought I needed to write people as love interests to get that; these days I feel more free to focus on whatever the heck I want, and being aro shows in everything. My current WIP centers a poly relationship where two of the partners are aromantic. Two people (often, but not always, a man and a woman due to my frustration with the ‘men and women can’t be friends’ thing) who are the most important people in each others’ lives and are platonic, show up over and over again in my novel ideas; I start with relationships that look like romances and then pull them apart. Part of this, I think, is due to my autistic ‘let’s take this into component parts and see how it works’ tendencies; being autistic and being aro aren’t cause and effect, for me, but they play well together.

When I write poetry, some of it deals explicitly with being aromantic, but all of it is non-romantic. It makes me kind of anxious sometimes to think of people interpreting pieces as being romo because they’re about intense emotions; one of the biggest ways being aro is expressed in my writing is my constant attempts to show other feelings, connections and relationships than romance being worthy of big feelings and gestures. I’ll sometimes refer to myself as ‘aromantic but capital-R Romantic’ (i.e.  extremely dramatic) because of that.

What challenges do you face as an aro-spec artist?

I’m sure I’ll run into more problems as I try to take my increasingly aro and queer and ND works to professional markets, but at the moment my biggest problem is self-censoring. I sit at an awkward junction of having multiple identities I want to include in my work, and being … well, someone who grew up obsessed with villains, who later on developed a decade’s interest in slasher horror, and who still tends to write people who are perceived as, or see themselves as, villains. Awkward because I always have that voice in my head (helped along by some of the stuff I see on social media) going ‘that’s not good rep! nobody will want to read this!’

But I know from experience that not writing from the heart (and look at that, I do have one after all!) doesn’t end well, so I’m working on getting good at writing my weird dark stuff and hoping I’ll find the audience for it. And I always leave a little bit of light in it, because I have another voice in my head, still saying, ‘just because you’re a villain doesn’t mean you can’t be happy’.

It’s a weird sort of positivity, but it works for me.

How do you connect to the aro-spec and a-spec communities as an aro-spec person?

Following and submitting to this blog is part of my first attempts to actually join the aro-spec community. I tend to move slowly and be very nervous of talking to new people, but I’ve been trying to be more affirming of my aromantic identity lately, and seeking out other aros is part of that. Hopefully I’ll settle in a little more as time passes.

How can the aro-spec community best help you as a creative?

At the moment, people following and reblogging from my poetry blog @mangledmouth would be much appreciated. It’s hard to get traction with poetry (especially if you don’t write romantic poetry) and I’d love more people to see my work. I’m proud of a lot of what I’ve done, so check it out! Be warned that my love for horror and oddness turns up there as well, but there’s nothing too graphic.

And Ko-Fi donations or small Patreon subscriptions are always appreciated.

Can you share with us something about your current project?

My current WIP (titled either The Night In Wanting or And One of Us Be Happy, depending on whether I go for the one that sounds better or the one that fits best thematically) is about a third done! Praise me, because I’m really bad at finishing things, but I’m still on track to wrap this up at the end of June. It’s about a Weird Small Town and Sarah, a girl with a reputation for breaking hearts, who decides to date one of her best friends and actually try to make it work. Her attempts at being normal quickly get derailed when their town’s general weirdness turns hostile - attacks by creatures from the woods, unsettling amounts of rain, pictures changing when you’re not looking at them and a really pushy forest spirit trying to bargain with people for a heart. Her attempts at normal are further derailed when she figures out that her new boyfriend is also in love with a mutual friend, and that she might not feel love at all.

I love these characters, guys. This story is finally coming together after years and the three main characters - Sarah, Mags and Fred - have always been at the heart of it, no matter what shape it took. (Mags used to be a ghost, and the story went through a phase of being a Band AU of itself. Fred kept getting possessed, and there’s a joke about that in the text now that nobody will get but me. And now you guys!) It’s terrifying to write a YA that’s not only poly, but focuses on an aromantic main character, but I’m determined to make it work.

(This is is one of the most sweet/normal things I’ve worked on, despite the healthy dose of horror. I’ve also been writing snippets of a pet project called How The Child-Eater Became King, to give you an idea of the other end of the spectrum.)

Have you any forthcoming works we should look forward to?

I haven’t got the release date for it yet (it’ll probably be a while yet) but I recently sold a short story, Sabuyashi Flies, to Glittership. The main character, Sabuyashi, was originally aroace but turned out to be a lesbian ace during writing. (Characters often decide to come out while I’m writing, which is always fun to handle. I mean that both sarcastically and genuinely.) I’m already working on and off on the sequel story where she meets her future best friend Nathaniel, who is aro. Working title is Nat Luckless and the Girl Made of Beetles. Look for news about Sabuyashi Flies soonish and Nat Luckless whenever my slow butt manages to finish and (fingers crossed) sell it!

[imnoexpertblog]

The Proposal

6/3/18

Good morning everyone! I hope your first weekend in June was spectacular. I know mine was! Some big things happened for my families (yes, plural). I’ll mention first that my little brother graduated from high school yesterday! It’s an accomplishment we are all proud of. Secondly, my blog’s 1 month “birthday” was this weekend and I was excited to go over stats and see the following I have gained so far. I can’t tell you how much I appreciate the positive and supportive feedback I receive every day. Thank you all so much. And lastly, Baby got down on one knee and asked me to be his wife on June 2nd. So here I am, writing the most requested blog to date: The Proposal.

My 22nd birthday was on May 15th. Baby told me he was going to send me to brunch at my favorite little restaurant, Spork, with my little sister as a late birthday gift. Vanny couldn’t come on the weekend I was free to go and I see my sister a decent amount anyway, so we asked my best friend from work. I call her Tammi as a joke and she calls me Becki. It’s funny if you know why but I won’t get into that now, LOL. I don’t get to see her at all now that I work third shift and she is still on second. Tammi was basically booked up the entirety of June! I told Baby about my bad luck getting a date for this brunch. He suggested I go with his first choice, his Aunt Jen. I was actually thrilled with this suggestion because I adore her. Baby and Jen are very close so the fact that she and I click as well as we do really and truly means the world to me. She and I are so similar sometimes its creepy (in the best way ever). I got ready to pick Jen up and Baby took Nugget to swimming lessons. We drove out to Spork for her first time. Jen and I talked about some deep and important things on the ride there and the whole time we ate. Though we aren’t the same age, we both have been through similar things in relationships and life. It was an intimate little date that I will always remember and cherish. We told each other things we haven’t told anyone else before and I will value that to my dying day. These private and personal things were shared over mimosas and beer-brat eggs benedict.

I can assure you, it was phenomenal! Jen paid for us both, which I thought was awfully wonderful of her. When we finished up eating, we went next door to this little boutique that is connected to Spork. We saw a bunch of adorable stuff, admired it all, and bought some small things. As I was checking out, Jen hands me a blank envelope. “This is for you,” she says. I was confused as heck but I opened it, of course. I recognized Baby’s handwriting.

“Hey Lovebug, I hope you are enjoying your time with Jen. Enclosed, you will find money to cover your food, and the money left over is for you to go get your nails done at 12:30 at the place you like. Someone will meet you there so don’t be late! After your nails are done, ask for your next envelope! I love you so much! Xoxo -Baby + Nugget”

I looked at Jen and she just smiled and shrugged. “I was just told to give you that.” I wasn’t sure what was going on but my initial thought was that he was just sending me around town all day with girls I love and pampering me. I dropped Jen off and headed over to the nail salon. I went next door to Starbucks to kill a little time because I was early. I got a Keto-friendly iced coffee and walked over to meet whoever it was that was coming. I walked in, saw no one I knew, so I checked in up front. I said was sent here by my boyfriend to get my nails done at 12:30 and that I am waiting for someone to come with me, but not sure who yet. She knew exactly what I was talking about. I sat down and watched out the window for probably 5 minutes when I see Baby’s mom walking up. I smiled and thought that was super sweet. A day of spending time with the women of his life! She walked in and hugged me before we told the receptionist what we wanted done. I am strictly a French manicure chick and Mom picked out her neutral grayish polish. We got pampered a bit and Mom paid for me while I was finishing up. I gave her the money from the envelope to reimburse her. We walked outside and I asked her if she was the one with the next envelope, and she said yes!

“Alright Babe… Time to put trust in my mom. Tell her to roll up her bandana and wrap it around your head and over your eyes. Love you and see you soon!”

I went from thinking there was more pampering to be done, to thinking that this might be the day. He might be asking me today. I wasn’t under that impression first because after my incessant hinting, he told me it wouldn’t be anytime in the immediate future. I started getting a little shaky, in a great way. I let Mom blindfold me and we waited a couple minutes for Baby. He got there and took my hands, guiding me to the car.

Mom took Nugget for us and we left. It felt like the longest drive I’ve ever felt. I was smiling the whole time, but so nervous. I had no idea where we could be headed. Racking my brain for important places from our relationship, I fiddled and fidgeted. He held my hand and gave it a few squeezes here and there. We finally got to wherever he was taking us. He kept me blindfolded and walked me to a specific spot. He told me to keep my eyes closed but took the blindfold off. After about 10 seconds, he said, “Open.” I opened my eyes and he was on one knee with a ring. I looked to my right. And saw a deck and a house. I kept looking around and saw familiar patio furniture, beautiful landscaping, and a pool. We were where we met 9 months ago, at the pool that we shot a music video at on September 3rd, 2017. I was in shock. I looked down at him with disbelief. “Will you marry me?” I almost dropped to my knees myself. I put my hands on his and said, “Of course I will marry you!” I pulled him up to hold him and we stood there embracing each other. I cried with his arms around me. I had honestly forgotten all about the ring while he held each other. I wiped my tears as I looked around the place we met. I never thought I’d be in this backyard again. He let go of me to put my gorgeous, massive ring on my finger. We kissed and laughed and lived in that moment. I walked to the chair I was sitting in when I first saw him. It felt like everything came full circle. He took my hand and we walked back to our car, an engaged couple. I asked him how he planned all this and how we remembered where this house was. He told me everything and I cried again in the car. He didn’t see it, but I did cry again. I couldn’t stop smiling, looking at my fiancé and my ring, and I couldn’t let go of his hand.

I gain so much in this future marriage. I am getting a husband, a step-son, and another wonderful family. I'm gaining the love and support of so many people that I didn't even know a year ago. I have been welcomed so easily and warmly into Baby's family these past 9 months. These two boys have answered my 22 years worth of hopes and dreams and prayers. All I have ever wanted is to be a wife and a mother, and now I have finally been given the opportunity to fulfill my lifelong dream. All three of us have been through so much in life and we are finally getting what we all deserve. "Happy" is the understatement of the year. I have no words to describe how I feel. I will never forget how in love I have been, how in love I am, or how in love I'm going to be for the rest of my life. I know for a fact that my boys were put on this earth for me. I won't let them down. We're going to be the Wielands.