#I love you hagu forever and ever

[lorysteatime]

rest in peace hagiwara you would've loved saying "ah-le-le???" with conan-kun

[nekropsii]

I’m curious which M/M alpha troll ships you’d put in the case study tier - who is in the Petri dish?

These aren’t ships to me, just dynamics I think are interesting for narrative reasons, but… Putting this under the cut since it's a little long. I got into some detail.

Content Warning: Long, Discussions of Abuse.

These are the top three things that come to mind on the subject. They're in no particular order, though!!

Cronus and Kankri’s… I can’t earnestly call this a friendship, that implies some kind of mutual genuine attachment, trust, and respect. This is more of an… Alliance, if anything. Their relationship is solely grounded in Kankri’s bootlicking, hemoloyalist pick-me horseshit, and Cronus gravitating to anything that can give his pathetic, sad, over-inflated ego a boost, whether it be through him tearing them down for no reason or, in Kankri’s case, enabling him for no reason. It’s worth pointing out that Kankri was outright against Cronus taking any steps towards any self improvement, so Kankri is absolutely partially at fault for Cronus being as brazen about his abuse and manipulation of others as he is. Kankri is at fault for Cronus’s manipulation tactic of adopting random minority identities, and faking suicide for pity points. We literally see Kankri backing Cronus up about these things. They are in the worst cahoots I’ve ever seen. Hitting people who “ship” them with a rock because none of them have ever read anything in their lives and it’s honest to god one of the most consistently, disgustingly out of character things I’ve ever seen. Zero understanding of the source material. Kankri’s always made into a Catholic Whore, Cronus is always wildly defanged and woobified. Completely unrecognizable. Jail.

Rufioh and Horuss’s… Already failed relationship. This thing started as a tryst while Rufioh was dating Damara before the game even fucking happened, so this thing has been going on FOREVER. Rufioh had been cheating on that poor girl for YEARS before she finally snapped, and Rufioh has the fucking audacity to call her crazy and paranoid?! I’m sending him to The Hague. Anyway, Horuss has that Zahhakian quirk of being very violently stuck in his ways as far as the caste system goes, and it’s interesting watching how smitten he is with Rufioh despite this (and, I’d argue, because of this, to an extent,) and how not into it Rufioh is. It’s interesting watching how Horuss clearly knows what Rufioh is getting at, he knows that Rufioh is trying to break up with him, he’s just incapable of letting go. And Rufioh is incapable of growing a fucking spine and communicating with people normally, instead of just immediately giving up and then turning around and talking major shit about people he presumably cares about behind their backs. As if that’s a normal thing to do. Asshole.

Cronus and Mituna’s… This isn’t a friendship, this isn’t a relationship, for the love of fucking god this is NOT a Kismesissitude, this is just undeniable extreme abuse we see on screen, constantly. Above everything else, if you ship this, I’m going to kill you with hammers and then shoot you with a gun. The thing is, though, you cannot separate these characters from each other’s writing. You cannot write a Mituna that has never been abused by Cronus and a Cronus that has never abused Mituna, because that dynamic there is so important to both setting up and understanding these characters as both characters and as people that they’d be completely unrecognizable without that element. You need to understand that you can make this shit become symbolic. Mituna is Cassandra. Cronus is both Apollo and Ajax the Lesser. Please understand the vision. It’s right there. It’s so easy.

[daeniradraconis]

This isn’t about hockey, but I need to get this off my chest. Today, my aunt—who was more of a grandmother to me than anything—died. And I stood there. Right next to her, watching the paramedics try to restart her heart like it was some fucking machine they could fix. Thirty minutes of that. Thirty minutes where my mind was spinning so fast I couldn’t catch my breath.

At first, it was panic. My head was filled with all the plans we had. All the things we talked about. She promised she would come visit me, see the city, see my life. I was going to show her The Hague. I was going to share that with her. But now? Now it’s gone. Forever. That future is lost in the blink of an eye. I’ll never hear her laugh or see her smile in those moments again. And I can’t even wrap my head around that.

Then came the guilt—the kind that rips you apart from the inside out. How little I ever told her I loved her. Once, maybe twice a year, if I was lucky. But we’re from Central Europe, where emotions get buried deep, where "I love you" gets tangled up in all the unsaid things we think we don’t need to say. But that’s bullshit. That’s not enough. I should have told her every single time I saw her. Every time. I should have made sure she knew, in every way possible, just how fucking loved she was, especially in those last seconds, in those moments when she had no idea what was coming.

And as I watched her body on the cold, hard floor of the kitchen, something primal inside of me broke. This is life. It’s right here, in front of us. One minute you’re laughing, making plans, telling yourself you’ve got all the time in the world—and the next, you’re gone. Just like that. Gone. And it could happen to any one of us, at any moment. So if you’re still sitting there, trapped in that miserable fucking job that drains the life out of you, quit it. Walk away. Kiss the person you’ve been holding back from, even if it scares the shit out of you. Buy that damn dress you’ve been eyeing but think you don’t deserve. Do the things you’ve been putting off. Live. Live for you—because no one else will.

Loss is a fucking beast. It doesn’t just hit you once and leave. It creeps back in when you least expect it, like a shadow that doesn’t care if you’re ready for it or not. But here’s the thing: You have to fight through it. You have to fucking live in spite of it. Hug your loved ones. Tell them you love them. Be raw. Be real. Because you never know when your chance to do that again will be ripped away from you without warning.

[singlesablog]

A New Cool

“West End Girls" (1985) Pet Shop Boys Parlophone Records (Written by Tennant/Lowe) Highest U.S. Billboard Chart Position – No. 1 

There are two lines of thinking concerning the debut pop single for the seminal electronic pop band Pet Shop Boys; one, that the song is atypical of all of the hits they would ultimately create (and are still creating over 30 years later), and the other is that this is their signature song.  I am of two minds, that it is at once very them, and conversely not them at all; in some ways their first hit was a makeover of the band, whether by design, or not.  It is undeniable that in 1986 it was enormously successful, an evocative ear worm, and that the single introduced the strangely beautiful tenor voice of singer Neil Tennant, and ushered in one of the greatest pop duos ever. 

Neil Tennant and Chris Lowe met in a hi-if shop in London on Kings Road in Chelsea in 1981, and discovering a mutual love of electronic music, formed a band.  Tennant was at that time an assistant editor at Smash Hits magazine, and Chris a college student studying architecture.  Immediately, they began writing songs together in Neil’s bedsitter apartment (which I believe translates as a studio in the US).  They signed with American producer Bobby O (who oversaw rather crude Miami-tinged 80s dance music) in 1984/85; together with him they produced for the first time many of the songs that would appear on their debut Please, and the follow-up LP, Actually. “West End Girls” was released in 1985 as a 12” disco version that was much cruder and sparer; it was a minor hit in Europe and a “Screamer of the Week” on the influential 80s radio station WLIR in Long Island, New York (who's djs had a nose for new wave talent).  Nevertheless, it sank, and they spent the next year extricating themselves from Bobby O and signing with EMI, relinquishing to him some of the future royalties on many of the soon-to-be famous songs they had already written, including “West End Girls”, “Opportunities”, and “It’s A Sin” (all of which were re-recorded and eventually went top ten in the United States).  It would seem that the Imperial phase for any great band must always begin with a lawsuit.

“West End Girls” was re-released by the band in late 1985 in a much different version produced by Stephen Hague, and it immediately conquered the world, selling 1.5 million copies.  Where the Bobby O version squawked and squealed and sounded dated even then, this new track slithered on to the airwaves with a newer, more insinuating quality.  Rather than a club banger, this was now a highly suggestive track, with droning, floating synths, every effect modulated downward into an expression of cool detachment.  It was an important single not only in introducing this idea of bored aloofness from the duo, but also by permanently stamping them with the image.  No matter how hard they would try in the future to produce bombast (say, on “It’s a Sin”, a truly bezerk pop hit) they would be forever labeled as sardonic, stand-offish, bored, or sarcastic.  These are words that really translated into one idea for me: that they were actually gay, and smart, and therefore happy to play along with any narrative the public chose for them as long as people continued to buy their records.  The song’s lyrics, written by former history major Tennant, apparently reference Eliot’s “The Waste Land”, which sounds hilariously high-toned, but for the then 19 year old that first experienced it, it was clearly a coded story of gay boys clubbing on the wrong side of town, because the gay bar is inevitably on the wrong side of town, and that perhaps West End Girls is a clever wink at describing gay men crossing over. On top of all of these suggestions was a very fey British man successfully talk-rapping lyrics (a rap I can to this day successfully recite), telling a story with no obvious conclusion, because, well, you know.  It is a coded song about a coded world.  And while the Pets didn’t invent the electronic pop song, like couturiers they certainly tailored it to the measure of some very strict gay signifiers, and when I fell in love with the hit (and the band) I was already acquainted with those ideas and understood them instantly.  Of course, I did not experience the duo as detached; instead, they were stylistically and artistically brilliant, and their songs were clever, propulsive, and unique. 

Please as an album can be examined as a cohesive slice of queer nightlife in the 1980s: escaping to the city (“Two Divided by Zero”, “Suburbia”), sneering at society (“Opportunities”), fighting oppression (“Violence”, “I Want a Lover”), and, finally, reconciling to life and love, whatever that might mean (“Later Tonight”, “Love Comes Quickly”, “Why Don’t We Live Together?”).   I am sure “West End Girls” does reference “The Waste Land”, but somehow, just perhaps, Neil, the master of collage, is actually speaking more allusively to the mating habits of the male homosexual circa 1985.  Chris Lowe, for his part, made absolute certain that the songs would be played were they belonged, which was in the club, his complete obsession in every way; the electronic sounds he produced are essential to the texture of what Pet Shop Boys ended up doing better than anyone else, which was to document gay lives by dropping clues and signals to fantastic disco music while leaving out the specifics. And this is possibly why the original Bobby O version was so awfully wrong, and not really them: the duo must have discovered that they didn’t need to bang bang bang, that they could be better than that.  In fact, they actually didn’t need Bobby O at all; they could conjure up these subtle and delicious scenes all by themselves.

Sadly, Bobby O still got the money.  Kind of just like a Pet Shop Boys song, isn’t it?  

A little cynical, but true.

-

*The title of Please, which I always found entertaining, I imagined was a reference to gay men chastising one another with "Oh, Please", or "Girl, Please." This has never been substantiated. Instead, Neil was quoted as saying it was a little joke, so when a customer asked for it, they would be forced to say I would like Pet Shop Boys, Please. Hmmm. Regardless, this would still qualify as a double entendre.

-

Dropping a hairpin (verb, gay, archaic slang term): to reveal one's sexual preferences by dropping broad hints; thus keep your hairpins up, and maintaining a 'normal' mask.

Who, who wants a cocktail?  (“Opportunities (Reprise)”)

Someone spread a rumor.  Let’s run away. (“Two Divided By Zero”)

In every city, in every nation, from Lake Geneva to the Finland Station.  (“West End Girls”)

You may not always love me I may not care But intuition tells me, baby There's something we could share If we dare, why don't we?    (“Why Don’t We Live Together?”)

And you wait 'til later, ‘til later tonight.  'Cause tonight always comes.   (“Later Tonight”)

Neil Comes Out

In the early 1990s, Jimmy Somerville, formerly of the very out, gay 80s band Bronski Beat, accused Neil and Chris of Pets Shop Boys of exploiting gay culture for career purposes, and of not putting anything back.

Neil came out officially in 1994, and commenting in print on the matter, said that he resented anyone telling anyone how out they should be, or just what constituted a “contribution” to gay culture: 

“I do think that we have contributed, through our music and also through our videos and the general way we’ve presented things, rather a lot to what you might call ‘gay culture’. I could spend several pages discussing the notion of ‘gay culture’, but for the sake of argument, I would just say that we have contributed a lot. And the simple reason for this is that I have written songs from my own point of view…”

He pauses again. “What I’m actually saying is, I am gay, and I have written songs from that point of view. So, I mean, I’m being surprisingly honest with you here, but those are the facts of the matter.”

Having finally got all that off his chest, Neil Tennant pours himself a glass of mineral water and takes his sweatshirt off. He is looking distinctly pink around the gills. Maybe it’s the effect of suddenly admitting that for all these years he has been singing nothing but the truth. Or maybe it’s just the unbearable heat in here. “Well,” he says, in a voice which carries a distinct [air of]‘moving swiftly on’, “what’s your next question?”

Source: Neil Tennant in Attitude Magazine, 1994

[amarguerite]

I've only ever read fiction before but I've been wanting to try some non fiction too, so both I guess.

Hmm ok so for fiction:

Stuff written during the Regency:

Evelina by Fanny Burney. Epistolary novel and coming-of-age novel about a young country miss who goes to London and has to learn social rules. I don't think Burney's stuff aged as well as Austen's, but this one if my favorite of hers.

Frankenstein by Mary Shelley. The OG. The beginning of science fiction, arguably, depending on how you feel about Margaret Cavendish's The Blazing World, or that thing Cyrano de Bergerac wrote where he says he flew to the moon using some geese.

Manfred by Lord Byron. I have a real soft spot for this uber dramatic, Gothic closet drama in verse. It is really nuts, but a real fun read.

Endymion by John Keats. Another epic poem, one which gives us "a thing of beauty is a joy forever." Contains what I think are some of Keats's most beautiful images outside La Belle Dame Sans Merci and Ode to a Nightingale.

Honorary mention to Sir Walter Scott's Ivanhoe here, which I loved as a kid, but I suspect did not age well. It's one of those novels that was really progressive, for 1819, in its treatment of Jewish characters, but I'm willing to bet that if you looked at it now, it would be Bad.

Stuff written about the Regency, much later:

Life-Mask, by Emma Donoghue. Warning, this book is extremely long and slow-paced, but so, so good. So chockful of details and complicated relationships between historical figures, and insights into the world of the Regency stage. Focuses half on the actress Elizabeth Farren and her rise in the world and eventual marriage to an Earl, and half on the lesbian sculptor Anne Damer.

Cotillion by Georgette Heyer. It's a silly, fluffy romp about a spunky ingenue getting a fashionable himbo to help her have a Season in London. Great escapism.

Master and Commander by Patrick O'Brian. The first of a twenty book epic adventure series, and the one you really need to read if you want to understand where everyone is on the ship at any given point in time.

Horatio Hornblower by C. S. Forster. Another epic naval adventure series. Not quite as fun as Master and Commander as the main character's very gloomy and depressed all the time, but my introduction to the Age of Sail, so it still holds a place in my heart.

In terms of Regency romances, I'm fond of Tessa Dare, Sarah MacLean, and Carla Kelly, but their historical accuracy is... suspect at times.

Honorable mention to the Sharpe series by Bernard Cornwall, which I devoured, and love for their battle sequences... but every single female character gets a really raw deal in every single book. The BBC series is real fun, and features a young Sean Bean wearing very tight pants and shouting, "Bastard!" across the Iberian Peninsula.

Non-fiction:

Dress in the Age of Jane Austen by Hilary Davidson is my favorite book about the Regency ever, ever, ever. It's very serious fashion history that manages to touch on every aspect of Regency life. SO HELPFUL for fic stuff.

Black London by Gretchen Gerzina. Available free as an ebook!

I'm really fond of Elizabeth Longford's two volume biography of Wellington, Kate Williams’s biography of Emma, Lady Hamilton, and William Hague's biographies of William Pitt the Younger (Prime Minister for the early part of the Regency) and William Wilberforce (British politician credited with ending slavery). I have a love-hate relationship to Amanda Foreman's biography of Georgianna, Duchess of Devonshire because it's a gripping read, but it felt at times like the author was really in love with her subject and let that bias her interpretation of sources.

[adelleandlaura4ever]

Love is Like a Rainbow

Our love is like a rainbow

Endowed from heaven above

A multi-coloured spectrum

Born of sunshine and rain

.

When my love is far away

Closed eyes bring her close in my heart

And a sunshine prism rainbow

Comes to brighten up my day

.

When I gaze upon a rainbow

I smile and think of you

And morning mist through sunlight

That calms my stormy soul

.

Our love is like a rainbow

A kaleidoscopic dream

Nature's enchanting palette

Coloured joy and happiness

.

With our feet firmly grounded

And our heads among the clouds

We need no buried treasure

Nor shimmering pots of gold

.

With you right here beside me

Our rainbow has no end

With arcs of vibrant colours

We'll never feel subdued

.

But should darkness descend

And leaves us sad and blue

We'll cry a double rainbow

Together, me and you

.

Our rainbow love forever green

Will never wither and die

Always steadfast ever true

We’ll stick together like glue

.

Then walk into the sunset

To reach the other side

Of orange, red, and yellow,

Violet, indigo, and blue

.

Our love is like a rainbow

With many colours and hues

A beauty in the heavens

For Soulmates me and you

.

Our love is like a rainbow

Always shiny bright and new

You're the sunshine; I'm the rain

I am surely blessed with you

.

Adapted from a poem by Jo Alexis-Hagues

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

My beautiful Liebling,

You are truly always present in my heart

And dreams of you greet me through the night.

It is said when the person you love,

lives in your dreams and stirs your passion so strongly you wake with a pounding heart,

and she’s waiting for you in your next dream filled night with a smile and loving embrace...

You’ve found your soulmate !

For me, this has been proven many times.

Laura, you truly are my beautiful Soulmate!

I love you deeply Laura ❤️❤️❤️❤️

@dreamiingofher

@adelleandlaura4ever

[keanureevesisbae]

When in Amsterdam

A one shot in the universe of ‘The Alluring Charm of Henry Cavill’

Henry Cavill x Adelaide Park

Summary: Henry decides to surprise Adelaide with a trip to Amsterdam

Wordcount: 1k

Masterlist // January Masterlist

This is my first time in Amsterdam. I’m so grateful that Henry took me on this trip. We already went to his place in the UK, we spend some time in Jersey with his family. Since we were close by, he thought it would be a great idea to go to the Netherlands. We already visited the Hague and Rotterdam and now we spending the last few days here in Amsterdam, before we head to New York for filming my newest movie.

We went on an Amsterdam Canal Cruise, we visited Volendam for a picture in traditional costume (and laughed so hard when Henry walked in clogs) and ate way too many ‘stroopwafels’.

We are strolling over de Dam, but we quickly take a detour, because of the billion uncontrolled pigeons flapping around.

‘Henry,’ I say to him, when it’s a little less crowded.

‘Yes, my love.’

‘Thank you for this trip. I really like spending time with you, especially when we’re in another country.’

‘I love traveling with you,’ he says, squeezing comforting in my hand. ‘How about you and I travel the world together?’

Together… Being together with Henry, it’s time well spend. I love being around him and the time I’m not with him, I miss him so much. ‘Where do you want to go?’ I ask him.

‘I want to visit at least Australia, South-Africa and Brazil with you, but there are more places I want to go with you. How about you, sweetheart? Where do you want to go to?’

‘South Korea,’ I tell him. ‘With you and my parents, so you can meet some of my family. If you want to of course.’

‘I would love that.’ Henry stops walking, as we look out over a canal. ‘You know,’ he says, ‘I always enjoyed going to different places on my own or with friends, but traveling with you… It’s like a whole new world opened up for me. You are a great travel companion.’

My heart swells hearing those sweet words. ‘That’s oddly romantic.’

‘Why add the oddly?’ Henry asks, semi insulted. ‘I was being so insanely romantic and now you broke my heart with your oddly romantic.’

I roll my eyes. ‘Drama queen, you. But I do have to say… It’s sweet that you like traveling with me.’

‘Not just like. Love.’ He places on hand on the edge of the railing, as he wraps a strong arm around my shoulders. ‘I’m so lucky to have such a fun traveling partner with me.’

After our stroll through Amsterdam, Henry walks us to the hotel suite and plops on the bed, sprawled out, confiscating the entire bed with his large body. I take off my jacket and place it on the back of the chair. ‘Come here, Addy,’ Henry says, ‘I am cold, I want a hug.’

‘Liar,’ I chuckle, ‘you just want a hug.’ I jump on the bed and partially on top of him. Thankfully I know he can handle it, because he laughs and wraps his arms around me. ‘Henry,’ I say to him, my tone changing from playful to serious.

‘What’s wrong?’ he asks, pushing a strand of hair out of my face.

‘Did you see that couple?’ I ask him, ‘at the last cafe?’

He nods. ‘With those kids?’ he fills in.

I nod. ‘They were cute, weren’t they?’

‘They sure were,’ he admits.

‘You ever think about kids?’ I ask him. ‘Not right now, but later on in life?’

Henry smiles. ‘I do, honey. Specifically kids with you.’

My heart flutters as I bite my lower lip to prevent myself from squealing. ‘Really?’

‘Really. Can you even imagine how cute our kids would be? My curls, your eyes and they would probably be really tiny.’

I can’t help but laugh. ‘Shut up. I want my kids to be tall.’ I run my fingers through his soft curls and ask: ‘Where do you want to raise them?’

‘Is that why you’re worried?’ he asks me. There was a time that he didn’t know how what was going through my mind, but we passed those times a long time ago. He can look at me and know almost exactly what I’m thinking, even if it’s making a decision at a grocery store.

‘Maybe a little. I have been thinking about our future for awhile now.’

My mouth all of the sudden turns a lot drier. I wasn’t exactly sure where this conversation was going, but since it is happening right now, I feel like I cannot wiggle myself out of this.

Much to my dismay.

‘Sweetheart, you can tell me all about your thoughts about our future.’

‘Well,’ I start, ‘I don’t want kids right now, but maybe later on in our relationship. It’s just that I was wondering where you want to raise our children. I know it’s not something we should worry about now, but… Never mind.’

‘No, no, no.’ Henry turns around, so I slide from his chest and we’re both on our sides. ‘Not never mind. We’re gonna talk about this and I want you to be as honest as possible. Tell me, sweetheart, where do you want to raise our kids?’

I sigh. ‘You truly want to know about it? I thought about it long and hard.’

‘Of course I want to know,’ he says, a soft smile toying on his lips, while his rough finger tips graze over my cheek.

‘I kinda want to move to the UK.’

Henry’s eyes tell me he sure wasn’t expecting that. ‘Really?’

‘Together with my parents,’ I say. ‘LA is my hometown and forever will be, but I cannot raise my children there. Not after everything that happened there. I also want my parents to live close by, so they can see their grandkids grow up. I know they would love that. Besides, my dad would love it to move here.’

He smiles. ‘I totally understand it,’ he says. ‘How about… You and I find a nice house outside of London and we’ll look for a nice place for your parents close by?’

‘Are you sure?’ I ask. ‘I don’t even know where you want to raise our kids.’

‘You do,’ he says with a smile. ‘In a lovely place a little outside London with your parents close by.’

[captainshyguy]

not to be a little melancholic but i've been thinking a bit about all the people that have come and gone in my general social circle like. not just irl, but online too. the close friends, who eventually left, and the ones on the outskirts, but were always there. at least, for a time. the people you never quite talked to, but were in your bubble, in your life, if just for a bit. the people who will only be icon, words on a screen to me. the people who will forever be 14 in my memories, because its all i have of them 

its just...its weird yknow? not even getting into social circles from school, friends you grew apart from, friends of friends of friends in your class that you had an odd connection with

but online its like. i’ve been in a few online communities in my time. the penguins of madagscar community on fanpop, one for the same fandom on deviantart, the agents of shield one here, then the maze runner, then star wars, then mario, then star wars again...i’d say ‘and hollow knight now’ but lets be honest, i haven’t made....many friends or even mutuals through it solely X]

i guess my point is like. all of these communities were different people. and over time, whilst i’ve generally stayed put (until i was physically the last one left, and jumped ship, like fanpop) people just. they left yknow? maybe it took a couple of months, maybe a couple of years, but they did, and its such an almost...odd thing to experience

im not saying people cant leave, not at all but it just made me think how many people i’ve known, how many i’ve been friends with, how many existed in my orbit. how many i only have pieces of. and i guess...how many people’s orbits i was in. the person i was in the past lives on through each and every one of then, and i have no idea what stuck. what’s their ‘luke’ memory, their takeway. heck, some of them wouldn't even have it by that name. 

one thing im glad about in a way is like. from each of the communities that like. meant something to me, i managed to grab a few people almost. a few that also dug their heels in, a few that are still in my orbit, however close or far, but they’re there. they’re posting actively or somewhat actively and i know where to find them. and thats nice 

it just makes me wonder sometimes yknow?? how many people currently in my circle, currently in my orbit, will eventually leave one day? who will stop posting, who’s icon i simply will never see again.

i do hope, with all my heart, that all the ones that i fell out of touch with are doing well 

(im musing about specific people under the read more, WILL get long kjdfhnd) 

from my primary/secondary school i dont have anyone exactly. the closest i have is one guy i was pretty fond of but not like. romantically. i follow his youtube and whilst i dont really watch the videos seeing his face pop up every now and again is nice. but man i do think back on those secondary school friends. funnily enough by the end whilst i liked my “official” best friends i honestly ended up more fond of others. sarah, priya, shriya, zarah, zi yu, kyle. danny, introducing me to treasure planet, hiding away with him and his friends to watch films in forgotten rooms when it was near the end of the year, then liam, of course, man..its weird he was my best friend in the first few years when i moved there, then we got put in different classes so we just didnt see eahc other much. but that fondness was always, always there. god, and jake....i wonder if he thinks back fondly to the two of us pretending to be transformers. i wonder if im still jazz to him. god, and then sophia, just, not even hanging out but having our little ‘hot buttered toast’ song. i hope thats the memory she has of me. (i haven’t even listed everyone from this part, and i couldnt! it was a 7-8 year period of my life! right during my brain developmental stages!!)

its weird i was in love with ryan for nearly three years. a lot of those memories are soured knowing one of my friends spread it around school and everyone secretly knew, (and looking back i was way out of his league like, morally lol) but still. maybe once or twice a year i’ll dream about him, and for a brief moment, im there, sitting with him in geography as he shows me magic tricks, during that period i do genuinely think he liked me too (before it wore off for him lol) and im still in love. 

from college, man....ewan was like. i have a feeling he was leading me on since he had a girlfriend lmao, and was just flirting for fun bc he saw i was shy and was trying to get me to react, but it never felt like bullying yknow? i dont think he was actively trying to make fun of me. so i dont know, it was nice, it felt nice and it still kinda does. 

khairun.....im so glad i still have her. i’m still a little gay for her. i remember sitting with her on the bus, riding for hours as we were on the geology trip, and she would ramble about the game of thrones video game and she’d squint so happily and her eyes would sparkle. she talks about dark souls now and i only see her messages, but i can still feel her enthusiasm. or tanisha and fatima, my other geology friends, my maze runner friends. seeing the scorch trials with fatima in the cinema. joking about newt and thomas with tanisha. sitting around the table with my actual friend group, in the big lounge chair reading the tolkien dictonary, joking about the flash with bindiya. sleeping around maddie’s house and playing would you rather. 

heck, i didnt even touch on teachers!!! teachers i connected with so much on a genuine level!!! mrs chambers, mr hauge, mr wrght, miss lloyd, mr hutchinson, miss petra, mrs young! mrs mohammed, mr santa maria, mr longdon, miss langley, mrs maize, miss davies. i know with teachers, the kids must start to blur together at a point. but i just....i hope, at least. with those first two, they’ll remember me, just a bit. i keep having dreams where im in my old school, and i try to find them., i’ve found mr hague a few times. but until about a month ago, whenever i got to geography, miss chambers was never there. im glad i finally found her. 

then fanpop...lexii, having the same birthday as me, talking with kait and roleyplaying as penguin ocs in high stakes situations. dating dylan fkjdngjdh, rigging the club’s presidential election. its weird, i dont have a lot of memories from this time. just....just people? people posting their ocs, people drawing ech others ocs. kaitlyn, anya, kait, dylan, lexii, imaneasel, mya, peacebaby, madascargirl, kate, starslight, imogen, tressa, sammi, crystal, cc, syliva, jasmine, hikari, amber,  yellow, steff, lilly, blue, richard, monique, sharpey, hannah, icicle, ratking, cian i- god, there was so many of us. theres more, i can think of more names. there was so many

anya did what i did pretty much and went to deviantart then kinda dug her heels in and didnt leave, though i don think she’s more active on toyhouse. and yet, i still see her art there, so its nice. having her throughout the years has been nice, watching as both of our art improves. she’s always been a bit ahead of me. then cian i’ve been talknig with pretty much every day for about 6 months now, thats been nice 

and then here, man! the agents of shield fandom! man! i dont remember a lot of names honestly besides the ones who stayed, and sam. i hope sam’s okay. y’all who stayed, who are still mutuals, the hm....five of us i think? though the one ofy’all i was closest to isnt around as often X[ but still. im happy y’all are here 

some of y’all that have been around long enoguh will know i was best friends with kacie for a while. from....i think that was my brief stint in the dan and phil fandom. she. well. she’s okay, the last i heard of her. but my overtalking screwed that up i think. my last message from her, a few years later, was amicable at least. i still feel awful about that if i think on it too hard

i think i only picked up ronan from the maze runner, at least, that i talk to, yeah, right, there’s two others that are still about but i dont think we’ve ever held a convo X] 

and u current peeps! from mario, star wars and.....im not quite sure where for some of you! i love u all! especially y’all that have been around forever, just, liking each others posts every now and again., i dont know how many people you all follow, but i follow less than a 100. i might only be a blip on your radar, but i like seeing y’all, genuinely. thank you for being in my orbit. i hope i’m a comforting or at least. nice reliable presence in yours, for as long as we all stick around.  

[scarletgardensrpg]

LIVING ♦ TWENTY ♦ NEUTRAL

MAURICE-ALEXANDER VAN ORANJE-NASSAU is the Royal Prince of the Netherlands, who has recently returned to Amsterdam following the discovery of he and his sister, Luana, in southern France. Although an heir to the Dutch throne was named in the late Queen Catharina’s will, he and Luana have so far refused to disclose this information, both publicly and privately. Although he is a beloved public figure like his sister, Maurice is more reserved, disliking the attention. He has recently received permission from Agostina to live part-time in The Hague.

BIOGRAPHY

They’d only ever really fought once: Luana, white-faced at the foot of a marble staircase, the front of her thousand-dollar dress smeared with cake, a lavender party hat crushed in her small palm—and Maurice, standing five steps above her with dark eyes and a scowling, mean mouth. In the empty, vast hall, he and Luana had glared at one another, the frigid silence echoing, before Luana spoke at last. Her voice was high, arrogant, accusatory: Mijn broer is een beest. Years later, by a seashore in southern France at the end of the world, they would laugh about it—what a stupid thing to have divided them for an afternoon, when now they had only each other. At the beach, Maurice massaged Lu’s head until she fell asleep, sparkling grains of sand still in her wet lashes. Those same hands had broken skin, splintered bone just hours before: without remorse, with pleasure. He turned the phrase over and over in his head like a well-worn coin. My brother is a beast.

- ❀ -

They tumbled into the world one after another: a girl, who wore cascades of sunshine atop her head in perfect curls, then a boy, silver-eyed and fox-faced, luminescent as the moon. These became their pet names among the royal maids and wet-nurses, the chauffeurs and visiting diplomats; zon-je, maan-je. At Christmas, Minister van Buskirk had placed a warm hand atop both theirs and smiled at Queen Catharina with familial tenderness: They are so lovely. And, perhaps, they really once were: twin dolls of the Dutch crown adorned in lace and jewels, running along open courtyards, laughing together by sparkling waterfronts—Luana the wild, Maurice the clever. They looked alike, but were distinguishable by their temperaments: where his sister socialized with ease and shone brightest standing in the center of a ballroom, Maurice longed for quiet—and where she was a rare blooming rose, he couldn’t help but feel like the thorns which covered her. Indeed, he made for a handsome, yet arrogant, little prince: standoffish to all but his twin sister, solitary and bellicose, as precocious and regal as he was boyishly bratty. 

In another world, he might’ve outgrown this hardness; he might’ve swept into adolescence with carefree contentment, learned not to bristle so much, had more than just Generaal de Jaager’s delinquent son for a friend, and ascended the throne with true kingly grace. You’d be a good leader, Gabriël always insisted, half-serious and half-laughing. I’d be good, for once. For a king like you. In another world, they might have really both been good. He could think of no other thing but this, shivering in the back of a black-clad woman’s car covered in his mother’s blood. He thought of it still, standing ankle-deep in the wet sand of the Mediterranean, watching Cecile shake hands, watching Luana sob, watching Dimitri’s pitiless gaze glance disinterestedly off him, and settle instead on Blue, who merely cocked her head and, at last, gave a shrug. Show the little ones to their new home, then. I haven’t got the time to. In another world, I am kissing Luana on the nose at our birthday party, Maurice thought to himself, but that life was already fading from his memory, buried under twenty-eight bodies and a dead lineage. In another world, I am feeding her cake and complimenting her dress and I am not so cruel.

But then again, maybe Maurice had always been destined to turn into what he did: a moon-child in love with the solitary night, hardness cracking and giving out to even more hardness, one nightmarish day after another no longer inciting fear, but curiosity. Call it a morbid longing, call it a refusal to spend five years shackled to terror. Was he not a prince? He, somewhere along the way, had become entranced by them: the black-eyed children of Cecile, so lovingly nicknamed bloodhounds. In a single safehouse, how did power fall so totally into the hands of the dead? The way Dimitri and Blue brawled with teeth and knives, the way Jacques could not be put at ease without some carnage to appease his appetite, their unapologetic adoration for their Mother of Death: Luana loathed to see it, but Maurice found himself drawn to their chaos like a moth to flame. What was a lonely boy-king to three gods of the New World? Maurice would work at tamping down his want, his need, to follow them like a pupil, years and years after they left. He could not leave Luana, of course, but Maurice also knew, with unspoken, slow-falling surety: to chase after the dead into the dark was to begin down an irreversible, treacherous path. And yet, some smoky, coiling voice whispered, like a hand around the throat. Which man can deny his heart forever?

CONNECTIONS

LUANA – ANOTHER WORLD. Beautiful Lu, whose name means lion, means happy, could never understand him. But he understands her, and he loves her—isn’t that enough? God, he hopes so. They have been joined at the hip since birth: two darling halves of a whole, each one with the secret keys to a lost kingdom. In youth, he had found her conceit so irritating, her shrieky charm so gauche—but seeing her now, a girl of only twenty who walks the halls of the Royal Palace burdened by the haunting of a hundred ghosts and battered by unspeakable heartbreak, he’d do anything to have his obnoxious, wonderful sister back for just a day. Once, she had been the one protecting Maurice: sheltering him with her great galloping laugh, her bright eyes, daring anyone to speak an ill word of him—so that now, he feels he must return the favor. A great, terrible secret of inheritance sits between them, and Maurice understands it is this single secret that will define whether they survive together in the New World or not. As far as Maurice is concerned, they will. They must. He’ll do whatever it takes.

DIMITRI – VIOLENT DELIGHTS. Boys will be boys, and beasts will be beasts. It’s strange to think that Maurice came of age in the company of wolves—and even stranger still that, at thirteen, he had stumbled into their lands so fearful and angry, only to be forced out five years later with an empty, wanting heart. Luana hates them all, but Maurice finds he can’t fully share in her opinion—particularly when it comes to Dimitri. There’s something mean-spirited to Blue and something grotesque about Jacques’ brand of violence; Dimitri, on the other hand, has always been able to wear bloodsport so well. He’s as refined as he is barbaric, as caustic as he is charismatic: and if anyone could embody the alluring dark, it would certainly be him. In Nice, Cecile’s bloodhounds had all largely ignored he and Luana, too preoccupied with each other or whatever errands they were sent on by Cecile. Nonetheless, Maurice had watched him: his manner of walking, the smooth cadence of his voice, every elegant arrangement of his handsome features—and unconsciously, learned to emulate him. Since his return to Amsterdam, they’ve crossed paths once more; and if Dimitri wasn’t looking before, he’s looking now. It’s too soon to say what they are, now, only that he no longer looks to Maurice with cool disinterest—and instead, is beckoning him forward into a dark, dark world.

GABRIËL – IF WE’D ONLY LAY DOWN OUR WEAPONS. His was the first face Maurice looked for, amidst the thousands who had come to greet the van Oranje-Nassaus: a sea of the living braced against the golden shores to watch the ship dock, hands outstretched, eyes brimming with glad tears—and there, beside Thalia: Generaal Gabriël, whose beautiful face betrayed no more feeling than that of a marble statue. When they were children, they had spent time together—more time than Maurice cares to admit, hours and hours reading beneath the trees and boating on the lake, sneaking away, exchanging secrets, all of it culminating in a kiss, or two, or three—but of course, he was Luana’s in the end. All lovely things were. Maurice isn’t completely sold on the convenient narrative Agostina tells of who is responsible for the massacre—but Gabriël’s partial involvement is, to Maurice, undeniable. He and Luana had both seen it: the exchange with PYTHIA, the handshake and head nod, the words spoken like a curse from Gabriël’s lips: Red de kinderen. Dood de rest. Luana may not have it in herself to exact vengeance—but Maurice, who has always been the worser of the two, certainly can. So blind he is with bitterness, that he can’t seem to see beyond it—if he were to look a little closer, he might find Gabriël isn’t the enemy he’s made him out to be.

OPEN ♦ FC: OTTO SEPPÄLÄINEN

[roominthecastle]

TBL 601/602 | first impressions

Red: ♪ you’re beautiful, it’s true ♪

me: biased

Dembe: a saint

music: on-point. this show is still one of the best when it comes to its tunes

the writing: operates w/ the subtlety and precision of a cartoon anvil. I love that we are finally starting to dig into the real past and identity of Red but... stop repeating that he feels like a different man bc we. get. it. and listening to Ressler/Cooper/Liz forever whining about doing the bidding of Evil Incarnate is genuinely tiresome. Add a bit of nuance, I beg of you. He isn’t the Devil, the Devil wouldn’t bother with the likes of you, and you all voluntarily signed up for this after Red made his terms very clear, terms that haven’t changed, so please get over it already or get out.

Red’s arrest felt like an intervention or like when the rich kid finally gets his smug ass hauled to the principal’s office, and I am not against the spirit of this move tbh. I love him, will always love him, but his cocky larger-than-lifeness needs to be checked every now and then by ppl he has no sway over. I enjoyed it when he was grabbed by a bunch of loony no-name criminals back in S3, and I similarly enjoyed him bested by a garden variety cop. Imagine how Ressler feels, tho. 5 years of intense investigative work + an expensive task force vs one vague phone call + a pretzel. lol

to me it’s clear Liz’s heart was not in this shortsighted plan, and she regretted it the second it became a reality w/ potentially lethal consequences. Her accusing Ressler of feeling relieved was her projecting guilt, imo. I think she’s more confused now than ever (playing “daughter” by hitting on your “dad”? nice one, girl). I cannot blame her for acting confused, esp after last season and the quality mindfuckery of that “what does ‘honest’ even mean?” scene you can write a separate essay about, but she desperately needs to start applying some critical thinking to her dealings w/ Red and Jennifer who manipulates and uses her, too. #writeLizBetterChallenge2019

I don’t get how “we have to publicly disavow any connection” suddenly turned into “sorry, our hands are completely tied” since the entire show is about pervasive clandestine government meddling and it’s not the first time Red gets arrested. This prison arc is shaping up to be another great example of “good ideas, poor execution” (no pun intended).

something is up w/ Samar

EU HQ in the Hague? Okay. Further proof we’ve been in some alternate timeline since S3. But at least Ressler went back to help w/ the bomb whereas Red waltzed away to... roleplay Khrushchev? (see my point above about some much needed intervention)

Liz has no memory of her father other than the one where she shot him dead bc he was beating up her mom, yet she still concludes he was a fine man. If this blind idealization is not a disturbing and still unaddressed pattern w/ her, I don’t know what is.

The Red/Liz dynamic officially reached a level of fucked-up (book) Hannibal and Clarice hovered on for a while before deciding to run away together and get married. I like it. It’s deliciously messy and unhealthy at this point, and I cannot wait to see where it goes.

[draaky]

#fotouitdeoudedoos❤️ #maagverkleining #blijfthuis #dierenliefde❤ #loveladylovelybeauty1987 #lady #Lovely #Beauty #draakyspeedy #whiskycharly #11122018💕 #huskyforeverhomebenelux #denhaag Even wat oude foto's van uit de oude doos om het zo maar te zeggen In 2013 woog ik rond de 130 kilo en nu weeg ik dan wel is waar 95 kilo maar ik voel me heerlijk en mag niet klagen heb een maagverkleining ondergaan in 2014 en ik zou het zo weer doen en heb ook nog eens 2x een buikwandcorrectie gehad en door dat heel raar heb ik veel meer zelfvertrouwen mogen ontwikkelen en ow wat ben ik trots op me zelf en ik ben in het huwelijks bootje mogen stappen met de liefde van mijn leven op 11-12-2018 Wij vangen als het nodig is honden en werken we aan waar het nodig is en soms verplaaten wij ook honden als ze ergens weg moeten en dan naar de opvang kunnen en of gelijk naar hun for ever home En zo als je wel ziet op de foto hebben wij ook dieren en daar zijn wij ook super blij mee Mochten jullie vragen hebben stel ze gerust Some old photos from the old box, so to speak In 2013 I weighed around 130 kilos and now I weigh true 95 kilos but I feel great and should not complain I have had a stomach reduction in 2014 and I would do it again and I also had 2x a tummy tuck and because of that very strange I have been able to develop a lot more self-confidence and how proud I am of myself and I got to marry with the love of my life on 11-12-2018 We catch dogs when necessary and we work where necessary and sometimes we also move dogs when they have to go somewhere and can go to the shelter and or immediately to their forever home And as you can see on the photo we also have animals and we are very happy with that If you have any questions, don't hesitate to ask them (bij The Hague, Netherlands) https://www.instagram.com/p/B-XD2pAg5du0cputZuk3zvvk4LxUEXs4JxpF4A0/?igshid=8z0acfdr7hrm

[djstreetwise]

Now as some of you might know, I'm originally not from Eindhoven, The Netherlands. I was born and raised in Schiedam, which is a city near Delft and Rotterdam. It's a boring place where nothing really happened. When I left Schiedam when I was 17, I moved to Rotterdam, The Hague (both in South Holland) and later on to different places in the province of Limburg. ⠀ ⠀ When I finally ended up in Eindhoven, I immediately fell in love with the city. Where I found Rotterdam & The Hague too crowded and unsafe and where I found Limburg too quiet and unkind to people who did not come from there; I found Eindhoven perfect. It was not too crowded and was very inclusive to people who did not grow up there. People were way friendlier, there were many parties, I felt safe. Besides, I loved the architecture and just the overall vibe in general. ⠀ ⠀ I have lived in and around Eindhoven since 2005 and don't ever want to leave again. I still love the people, the parties, the architecture and the great atmosphere. From Strijp to Stratum and from Gestel to Woensel, all the way back to the city centre and Tongelre. You have been good to me and one day I'll repay you with a huge festival in the streets of Eindhoven, just like Steve Aoki did in his hometown. One big ass Streetfest where everyone is welcome to party it up until the early hours of the day. ⠀ ⠀ Eindhoven Trap City forever in my heart! ❤️ ⠀ ⠀ Where are you from and were you born and raised there? I'm curious! Amazing photo shot by the master @riku_mnst! 📸 (bij Stratumseind Eindhoven) https://www.instagram.com/p/B814uLmnDvF/?igshid=avyeh3xk6egr

[bigyack-com]

What Do Gen Z Shoppers Want? A Cute, Cheap Outfit That Looks Great on Instagram

For every Greta Thunberg and school-skipping climate change protester, there is another member of Generation Z buying inexpensive clothes on a smartphone. Their purchasing choices — fueled by influencer culture and catered to by a new wave of ultra-fast-fashion retailers such as Fashion Nova, PrettyLittleThing and Missguided (responsible for a £1 bikini that sold out in Britain) — are as much about how an outfit will look on social media as in the real world. Three Gen Z shoppers in America, Australia and Britain invited us into their homes to talk about what they buy, and why. All of them work after school or save money to pay for their own purchases. Their interviews have been edited for style and clarity.

‘I Browse Every Single Day’

Mia Grantham is a 16-year-old British high school student studying for her A-levels. She lives with her father and her younger sister, Annie, in Wilmslow, England, a town outside of Manchester. Her bedroom is small but immaculately kept, with a bulb-lit dressing table and pillow shaped like a speech bubble reading “You’ve Got This” on her bed. Mia’s interest in buying clothes ramped up about 18 months ago, when she started getting an allowance and attracting followers on her social media accounts. She has more than 1,500 followers on Instagram, gets around 500 views per story on Snapchat and spends three hours per day on her iPhone XR (about five hours on weekends and during vacation). Her favorite going-out look is a red dress. She owns 14 of them.How often do you shop?I browse every single day — at least once — on the Pretty Little Thing phone app. It’s my favorite, and I don’t look anywhere else, except if I see something on an Instagram influencer I like. My current favorite is Molly-Mae Hague, a star from the 2019 series of “Love Island.” She recently created an exclusive clothing range for PLT, which makes me like the brand even more. Normally I look at shopping apps at the end of the day before bed for about 10 to 15 minutes. But if there is an event coming up that I want a new outfit for, then I could browse for more than an hour. I don’t really go to bricks-and-mortar stores. If I do, I go to Primark. Sometimes H&M. Maybe once a month, probably less.What kind of an event needs a new look?It could literally just be a meal. Or a house party, or a friend’s birthday. It could also be school, where we have a dress code but not a uniform.Why is Pretty Little Thing your favorite fashion brand?I pay £8.99 as part of a yearly subscription, which gives me unlimited next-day delivery on anything I buy. I know all the delivery people really well now — they always know when I have plans on a Friday or Saturday night. I don’t buy from places like Boohoo.com or Missguided as I’d have to pay for delivery, which would be a waste of money. I buy something at least once a week, and my basket value can be anywhere from £5.99 up. Once it was £230. Last week I bought 11 items and sent back three. Seventy percent of the time I send some ordered items back.How many pieces of clothing do you think you’ve bought in 2019?Eighty? One hundred? Those are pieces I’ve kept.What is your favorite piece that you’ve bought, and how many times have you worn it?The ones I probably wear the most are gray leggings that cost £2.50. For going out, I bought a silky red dress with a cutout for a house party. It cost £12.50 from the PLT Shape collection, which is for people like me who have an hourglass figure. I’ve worn it out three times, which is a lot for me. Normally I just wear a dress once.Why only once?Because I’ll normally be in photos when I’m wearing it that are then posted on social media. I wouldn’t really want someone seeing me in a dress more than once. People might think I didn’t have style if I wore the same thing over and over. Style is about changing for whatever the situation you are in and for different events.When do clothes become old for you?Well, things like leggings that you just wear in private around the house you can keep for years. Dresses, when you’ve worn them: twice.Is price important?Of course. If I’m only going to wear something once or twice, I’m going to want to buy the cheapest possible.What else do you look for?Social media is a big consideration. I’m on Snapchat and Instagram, and occasionally Facebook. I take selfies for social media every single time I go out, first in my bedroom and post them online, and then always with friends or my boyfriend, Will, when I’m at the party. More people will see an outfit online than they probably will in real life. I’m on Snapchat the most because of its messenger function, then Instagram, where I have both a public and a private account and spend an hour per day.For IRL, if I see an item I like, normally I’ll search for it on Depop before I buy it so I can see what a real person rather than a model looks like in it. People buy and sell fashion so quickly, I can usually find even the newest things on there. Most of my friends do that too.What constitutes a more special purchase for you?An Oh Polly! dress. I buy them for about £20 from Depop, though new they cost about £40 to £60. Those dresses I keep — I have three of them. Teenagers don’t mind buying secondhand clothes like some older people do: You can get good looks at a cheaper price, or directly swap one dress for another online. I tend to sell lots of the clothes I don’t want in big batches on Depop. It gives me the money to buy new things. I also sometimes take big bags to consignment stores in town, where they give you a bit of money for your clothes depending on how much you bring in.Do you ever think about where those clothes go once you’ve given or thrown them away?No.Do you ever look at where your clothes are made?Yes. I’ve noticed quite a few are made in England, which shocked me. I thought they’d all be made in countries like China, India and Bangladesh. Also, we have been learning a bit in Sociology about how our clothes are made and the working conditions for people who make them. In some countries I know they don’t get very good wages. It’s part of globalization. I wouldn’t talk about it with my friends casually, but we do talk about it in the classroom.What do you think of sustainable fashion?It came on my radar three months ago, I’d say. I am hearing more and more about it because a lot of brands are now bringing out sustainable fashion capsule collections, where clothes are made out of recycled materials, for example. A lot look the same as the normal collection but cost a few pounds more. But if I’m honest, I do think: Why would I pay more, when I can get the same for less?

‘I Don’t Like to Repeat’

Andrea Vargas, an 18-year-old freshman at Hofstra University, loves hunting for sales. She looks for them on websites like PrettyLittleThings and Boohoo, as well as physical stores like H&M and Forever 21, where she can flip through the racks and, occasionally, find gems.“I go shopping when the season sales are on,” she said one Saturday night at her family’s home in Farmingdale, N.Y. She commutes to school and spends most weekend nights out with friends: getting dinner, maybe going to a party or a concert. Her plan for this particular evening was to go to P.F. Chang’s with three girlfriends. Her room is small, with wood floors and inspirational quotes in photo frames on her pale yellow walls. A Billie Eilish poster hangs opposite her bed. A guitar she made out of an old skateboard sits in a corner.Scanning the clothes in her room, she began talking about how she got them. “The back-to-school sales, the fall sales, the summer sales,” she said. “I love sales.”Her absolute favorite piece of clothing is a red plush jacket from Forever 21. She wears it relentlessly when the weather is right. “It’s just so cute,” Ms. Vargas said. “I feel like it dresses up an outfit.”Ms. Vargas pays for her clothes herself, using money she earns by working at Target. The red jacket cost her around $40, and she said it was worth every penny. But, she said, “I feel like there’s no point in spending $40 on a T-shirt. I personally feel like if the quality of the shirt doesn’t match the price, it doesn’t make sense for me to buy it. If a jean jacket costs $60 and I can find it for $20, I’m going to buy it for $20. Especially since I’m in college, I need to buy all these books.”Ms. Vargas guessed she had purchased between 100 and 200 items this year, including shoes and jewelry, and that her wardrobe comprises 500 or 600 total pieces. “I would say the majority of it is shirts,” she said. “They have to be graphic tees. I like a little quote on my shirt here and there. I have yet to buy new jeans. I like a lot of ripped jeans. I rarely buy shoes.”She doesn’t generally check where her clothing is made, and she doesn’t feel guilty about how much of it she has. After she’s done wearing something, it can have a second life. “My mom is from El Salvador and my dad is from Nicaragua,” she said. “They’re not wealthy countries, so I like to give back to people who don’t have a lot. It’s hot there, so I can’t send long sleeves, but I try to send shorts that don’t fit me, things that are still presentable and wearable.”She thinks the right amount of money to spend on clothes is $10 to $15 on tops, and $20-$40 on bottoms. For dresses, which are usually for a special occasion, she’ll go over $40. She estimates she wears each piece 15 times before ultimately donating it or selling it on Depop — but she also doesn’t want to be seen wearing the same thing every day on Instagram.“If I have a shirt in one of my previous pictures I try not to take a picture again in it,” she said. “I don’t like to repeat.”Ms. Vargas had invited her friends over to get ready. Alana Wilson, 18, said that Instagram plays a big role in her shopping life, too. The moon-and-stars earrings that sparkled beneath her hair were purchased off an Instagram ad. Almost all of her clothes are from Fashion Nova.“If it’s cute, it’s from Fashion Nova,” Ms. Wilson said. “Any time I have money I’ll do a whole spree on Fashion Nova. I like it because a lot of IG models have it.”Another friend, Sofia Barbetta, also 18, agreed. “I feel like I find most clothes I want to buy in Instagram ads,” she said. “I don’t even follow that many fashion pages, but I see an ad and I’m like, ‘That’s really cute.’”She unlocked her phone to show some outfits she’d posted on VSCO, a photo-sharing app. “I went through a camo pants phase,” she said of one look. “This outfit, I got inspiration from Twitter.” Ms. Barbetta said she’d gotten very into Twitter lately. She started a Post Malone stan account several years ago, but lately it had become a place to post personal things.An hour after Ms. Vargas began getting ready with her friends, she zipped herself into her outfit for the night: a pair of black platform military-style boots from Target, black and white houndstooth pants, and a black off-the-shoulder top from H&M.“I got this outfit yesterday,” she said. “I was like, ‘This is the outfit I’m going to wear.’”But first, her hair. Ms. Vargas propped her iPhone up in front of her and sat cross-legged in front of her mirror. She pulled Miss Jessie’s Jelly Soft Curls styler through her waves. “I wanted to get one of those vlogging cameras,” she said, “one of the Nikon ones.” For now, she uses her iPhone.Hours later she used it to Instagram a photo of her and her friends posing outside a restaurant in 50 degree weather. They had decided not to go to P.F. Chang’s after all, and were at Taste of Asia instead. None of them were wearing coats.“Trust me we were freezing,” she declared in the caption. But they were all smiling.

‘I’m Dressing to Be Seen’

Nicole Lambert, 20, lives in Sydney, Australia, with her parents and is studying for an undergraduate degree in public relations and advertising at the University of New South Wales. She tutors students on weekdays and works a retail job on weekends. When she has time off, she and her friends like to dress up and hit the festival circuit. On a recent evening, after spending the previous day dancing to EDM, she and her friend Helena Marshall got ready in her bedroom for a more relaxing dinner.We’re not influencers — but … When I’m dressing to go out, I’m dressing to be seen, which is weird to say because we’re not influencers. It sounds shallow, but I think in the back of your head you’re like: I probably should avoid wearing the same outfit twice.At the end of the day, I prioritize the look versus the practicality. And that’s so unbelievable.Working to be cuteMy friend yesterday at this festival had a really cute Tiger Mist top with hearts all over it, but it had off-the-shoulder sleeves. I felt so bad for her the whole day, because she couldn’t put her arms up. But she got cute photos, so it was fine. I know when you put something up on Instagram and it does well, you’re like, “Well, that was a good choice on my behalf.” I love it when people message, “Where did you get that from?” You know you’ve found something people can’t easily find.Staying relatableI think about what I’m going to post for a decent amount of time. It’s a very curated version of your life. You want to look good in your photo, but have a funny caption so people know you’re down to earth and relatable.That’s why we have private Instagrams, because it gets tiring. That’s where we feel fully free to post whatever. The tragedies of your life. The real me.Keeping it privateOn my main Instagram, people wouldn’t know I’m funny. Because I just overthink what I post: Will people get it? Are people actually going to laugh at that?Sometimes I’ll get a weird feeling where I need to get off social media. I know some people delete their Instagram, like just the app. But that’s admitting to yourself that you have a problem.Leaving shops empty-handedI look for clothes at least once a week usually — either for an occasion, or just as something to do either online or in store. I shop 60 percent online, 40 percent in person. But 75 percent of the time, I’ll go to the shops, have a look around, and not find one thing because I think everything is the same.I’m not afraid to put on something weird. I’m really big into animal print at the moment. Almost to the point where I’ll wear too much of it. I love my snake pants — and flares. Flares should never go out.Princess Polly and Tiger MistFor basics, 100 percent of my wardrobe is from Kookai. They’re always rotating really nice, classic things. I get a lot of stuff off Revolve, because there are so many different brands. You’ve got things there that you’re not going to see five people wearing once you’re out. From other online brands like Princess Polly, Tiger Mist. Sometimes it’s overwhelming how much stuff there is online. I could go on for hours.Often, on Instagram, I’ll scroll through the Explore page, and people just tagging outfits. It’s so helpful because you just click onto the account, find the item. That’s how I find the little niche things.Where were these dresses made?If I feel so amazing in something, I’m probably not going to look too hard into the price. But I don’t like investing a lot of money for something you might not wear too much. I like PrettyLittleThing for crazy things for cheap, because they just do interesting little tops or little dresses, clubbing clothes. Do I look at the labels of clothes? Not really. In the back of my head, I assume that I know where the clothes are made: in China.In terms of how much I would spend: average price of a dress, probably about $180 Australian dollars. Jeans, about $150. A good going out top, $50. I do like a nice pair of heels, so I’ve spent like $200 for a pair. But then again I’ve got ones for $50. In my wardrobe now, I’d say I have roughly 200 pieces.Cycling the wardrobe overseasI do a big spring clean every year and send boxes of clothes over to my family in the Philippines. One of my cousins has a market stall. So I assumed that maybe my stuff would end up there if they didn’t want to keep it for themselves.I would say 30 percent of my wardrobe would get pulled out. Maybe 80 bits of clothes. It makes a good dent.When I pull it all out and you see a big pile of clothes on your floor, you feel a bit sick. I’m glad that I can send it somewhere and it’s helping at least my family.Supporting sustainability — or notI want to support sustainable brands. But if it doesn’t work for me and what I’m doing in my lifestyle, I’m going to go with something else instead.Timing is important. For what I wore to the Listen Out festival yesterday, I ordered on Tuesday morning, it came on Wednesday morning: literally in 24 hours. That means so much to me. I’m the least decisive person and the least patient person. When miniature bags were in, I was obsessed with this one from London. You could get your initials on it. But it said it could take 30 days and I was like, never mind. I got a cute one from Mango.You’re pushing it after seven business days. If it’s a big order I don’t mind waiting for a week. But if it’s one thing, it’s like: Why? Read the full article

[mitchonfire-blog]

Seven years ago I started a band along side my life long friend Alex Higgins and we were joined shortly after by Dan Armstrong and Dylan Williams. That band was “Death By Six”. Through the following seven years the band would see numerous line up changes (on the bass side of things) and we would go on to release 2 EP’s. We were also SUPPOSED TO release our debut album. That album was entitled “Hell or Hollywood”. Most of you that have found your way to this page are here because you were either a fan of “Death By Six” or you recognise this title and the songs contained within by another name...and that name is “Apollo On Fire”. But we will get to that. In the early months of 2015 Alex, Dan and myself were ecstatic to receive an offer from a record label in the USA and couldn’t believe we were about to sign our very first record deal. But what was supposed to be a dream come true soon became a nightmare. We entered the studio in September to record what was to be our debut album for this label. We couldn't have been more proud. Once recording had finished up in November and we were ready to hand our masters over to the label, all of the contractual promises of money for backing, PR, marketing and videos was being completely dodged and unfulfilled. All the label did was continue to pressure us to hand over the masters for release. What ensued was a tug of war between the band and the label. Luckily we made the conscious decision to pay the $15,000 up front, out of our own pockets to record the album and not risk owing the label money that we never knew if we would be able to pay back. This, in the end, is what saved these songs from essentially being stolen from us and release under a label with no promotion, no push, no tours, all in the idea of making a quick buck and leaving us stranded on a label that didn't give a fuck. Eventually after threat of legal action (unbeknownst to us, the label was already involved in another even larger lawsuit at the time) the label agreed to let us out of our contract and we were free to release. By the time this was all over, it was June-July 2016 and we had begun filming music videos for the release. We were so proud of what we had managed to accomplish on our own, especially with what had gone on. We were however afraid that after what the label had done, they were not going to let us go that easily. Our videos were continuing to receive copyright flags from the label and our content was constantly being pulled. This lead us to pre-emptively change our name in hopes of not having to abandon all that we had worked for, but this proved not to be the most honest choice to make. After the battle with the label and many months (years for some of the songs) had passed since writing and recording Dan and I knew that our hearts were no longer in “Death By Six” as they had once been. We were ready for change creatively. I think we believed changing the name could also lead to a fresh start but we were far more concerned with just moving on from the label/legal worries and seeing through what we had begun and worked so hard on with this full length album. Alex loved the new name and was fully supportive of us trying to do this to make a fresh start and see where this album would take the band.  The album was eventually release with 2 tracks missing (pulled to try and changed the band in a slightly new direction) under the name “Apollo On Fire”. The response from everyone was fantastic and we decided to tick one more thing off that we had always wanted to do, and that was travel. Those of you who follow me or the band know what happened next and once it was all said and done, we all knew if was best that we wrap up what we had begun and part ways. Alex is now working on his own solo material and we wish him that absolute best and appreciate every single ounce of energy he put into “Death By Six” and the music we created together. This brings us to today. The day where we finally set the record straight and close the book on the past.  The entire “Death By Six - Hell or Hollywood” album is now available in its entirety to stream on Spotify and all the videos associated with the album can be found on the Death By Six YouTube. This was never and will never be “Apollo On Fire” material. It was never recorded under that name, or created with the intention of being anything other than a Death By Six release. As of now, that is finally how it shall live on. I want to take a second to thank everyone that was ever involved in Death By Six from the bottom of my heart. Without every single one of you, we couldn't have created the art that we did or had any of the amazing experiences we had. Alex Higgins, Dan Armstrong, Dylan Williams, Michael Hague, Matt Evans, Essi Stefanakis and Jake Parr. Thank you so much for what you contributed to this band by recording and performing with the band. Beau Mckee & Kris Samos. You made recording our very first album as musicians an absolute dream, we will remember it forever. UAC Management, for all your love and support for our dream. And finally, thank you so fucking much to each and every person that ever supported the band by picking up a CD, a t-shirt, going to a show or telling your friends about us. It means everything to me. Please hit the link and check out the album on Spotify as it was intended with all its original tracks, including the never release Intro and re-recorded version of the “Heartless” track “Doomsday”. And celebrate a bunch of dudes who loved to play metalcore and go crazy. I would like to take this final piece of time to say the following: Apollo On Fire is a new band. This band consists of myself and Dan Armstrong. There are no songs as of yet. We have no releases as of yet. We have never played a live show. Several shows were played by “Death By Six” under this moniker but as you have read above, you can clearly see it was just the same band hiding from a label. I invite you all to please join us on this new journey. I am more excited than I have ever been in my life about the music that we are creating and I cannot wait to share it with all of you. Please keep up to date with what’s happening on our socials and get ready for some great music. Thank you to anyone who has taken the time to read this, it really means a lot to me. And if you got this far, this all obviously meant something to you too. See you all soon. - Mitch Bateman “Apollo On Fire”

[greekowl87]

Fic: Love Lock

Author’s Note: inspired by a local newspaper article about love locks. (Here). I also wrote this in less than an hour and while sipping on a wee bit of whiskey. Sorry for the typos. No beta. I hope you enjoy.

Written for @leiascully fic challenge of ‘Keys’

Then…

They had been on the run for two years now. For Mulder, he defined time from town to town, crappy motel room to crappy motel room. For Scully, it had all become a blur marked by the occasional argument and the make up sex afterwards. She was tired of running but she loved Mulder and that is what kept her with him. She loved him. Her soulmate. Her one in five billion. His touchstone. She loved him and that was it.

But Mulder was no idiot. He knew Scully. Sometimes he thought better than he knew himself. She loved him, but she was unhappy. She was very unhappy. The arguments had become more frequent. The make up sex less frequent. He honestly believed that she would just leave him and go back to a normal life. Whatever that was. Where was the breaking point?

They decided to go to Norfolk, Virginia. Mulder thought that maybe seeing her mother (in incognito of course) would help some of Scully’s unhappiness. Norfolk was close enough to her mother but still far away from D.C., the Hoover Building, and the FBI. In addition to allowing Scully to see her mother, he booked a hotel in the downtown area that was easy walking distance to a favorite local spot, Ghent. It was the least he could in a piss-poor-ass apology to her for ruining her life and causing this mess.

It overlooked the water, which Mulder knew she would love.

“Why are we here, Mulder?”

She practically pleaded with him as they entered the hotel room. She sighed when saw the view overlooking the Elizabeth river. She took off her beanie and the deep, fiery red of her hair emerged, a dye job gone wrong. Mulder dropped there bags and shut the door behind him. He gently rested his hands on her shoulder and she closed her eyes in exhaustion and leaned into his chest. “I’m tired, Mulder.”

“I know,” he whispered. “Which is why I arranged a surprise for you.”

He pulled her away and focused on her beautiful blue eyes. “You’re going to see your mother tonight. Spend some girl time and what night. I know you miss her. I know you miss…normalcy. It’s the least I can do for you. Have fun. You deserve it.”

That had been hours ago. It was well near midnight when she came back. She was silent. Mulder had been laying in the bed, channel surfing mindlessly. She smiled slight and held out her hand. “Let’s go for a walk,” she whispered.

“A walk.”

“Come on, Mulder. The weather’s nice. Norfolk is an old city. There’s stuff to see. Come on.”

She seemed…lighter. Happier. She had not dropped her purse or taken off her boots. She had dressed in jeans, leather boots, and a light jacket. He groaned and smiled indulgently. “This old man is coming,” he said. He leaned on his knees and pushed himself up from his bed. “Good time with your mom I take it?”

She smiled softly and kissed his cheek. “Thank you, for everything,” she whispered in his ear.

Mulder was not sure what had happened the version of Scully he had seen and lived with the past two years. She seemed, well, content. Together they left the hotel room and wandered arm and arm down the streets of Norfolk. Eventually they found themselves at a bridge overlooking the Hague. She had stopped him midway across the bridge and held his hands. She was still smiling.

“Okay,” Mulder joked, “What have you done with Scully?”

She pulled him towards him, wrapping her arms around his neck. She found his lips soundly. “I had a nice long talk with mom tonight.”

“About what?” he joked.

He was only aware of her. Any fleeting chance that they might be caught was absent. “Us,” she told him simply. “I love you.”

“As I love you,” he continued, uncertain of her train of thought.

She smiled and he pushed back her hair. It was red again, well, a deep fiery red like a fire truck. He loved seeing her as a redhead again, even though it was the wrong shade. She reached into her pocket and held out simple master lock and two keys. He smiled slightly and inspected the lock. ’M+S ∞’. He could not help but smile at the infinity symbol.

“Forever, Mulder,” she said simply. She attached the lock to the side of the bridge and held out a key to him. He took it cautiously. “And in case we ever change our mind.”

He took the key and smiled. A real genuine smile.

“I doubt that.”

Now….

It was a random case. A dead end. A waste of a trip that led them back to Norfolk, Virginia. But Mulder found himself at the same bridge that they had stood on fifteen years ago. He found their lock easily. He touched the faded initials and infinity symbol in reverence.

Before they had traveled to Norfolk, he had found the key to the lock. He had kept in his suit’s pocket during the entire time. But somehow, he found his way to the bridge. He leaned against the railing, contemplating the past year. She had left but they were on the mend, well, at least he thought they were. He was getting help with his depression and she was slowly making her intentions and feelings known, albeit painfully slow like the beginning, that she wanted to be back with him again. To go back to what they were.

“Should I be surprised to see you here?”

He looked up and saw Scully standing at the foot of the bridge, smiling lovingly at him in the lamplight. She walked slowly before joining him, overlooking the edge of the bridge. She rested her chin on her arms and smiled. That smile. Mulder felt his very soul warm.

“I found our lock,” he told her, absently looking out into the water. “It’s still here.”

“Hm.” She looked back out into the waterway as well. “I’m surprised.”

“I saw a news article that they are cracking down on these 'love locks.'” She played with one of the many locks that still remained on the bridge. “But surprisingly, ours is still here.”

“We’re forever, Scully.”

“Forever.” She pursed her lips and dug into her pocket and held out a worn, familiar key, identical to her own. “Do you still have yours, Mulder?”

He dug into his suit jacket pocket and held out an identical key. She gave a small smile. “I’ve been thinking,” she whispered.

“About what?”

“Us.”

“What about us?”

She fingered the small key thoughtfully, smiled, and then threw the key out into the water, never to be seen again. Unspoken communication had never died between them. If not, it only made them stronger as they began to see each other and work together again. He felt her confidence and resolution. He fingered the key and smiled again. He let the key fall easily from his fingers, down into the murky waters below.

“Forever is forever, Scully. Isn’t it?”

“Yes, it is, Mulder.”

And she kissed him, forever sealing their bond together.

-End-

[adelleandlaura4ever]

Love is Like a Rainbow

Our love is like a rainbow

Endowed from heaven above

A multi-coloured spectrum

Born of sunshine and rain

.

When my love is far away

Closed eyes bring her close in my heart

And a sunshine prism rainbow

Comes to brighten up my day

.

When I gaze upon a rainbow

I smile and think of you

And morning mist through sunlight

That calms my stormy soul

.

Our love is like a rainbow

A kaleidoscopic dream

Nature's enchanting palette

Coloured joy and happiness

.

With our feet firmly grounded

And our heads among the clouds

We need no buried treasure

Nor shimmering pots of gold

.

With you right here beside me

Our rainbow has no end

With arcs of vibrant colours

We'll never feel subdued

.

But should darkness descend

And leaves us sad and blue

We'll cry a double rainbow

Together, me and you

.

Our rainbow love forever green

Will never wither and die

Always steadfast ever true

We’ll stick together like glue

.

Then walk into the sunset

To reach the other side

Of orange, red, and yellow,

Violet, indigo, and blue

.

Our love is like a rainbow

With many colours and hues

A beauty in the heavens

For Soulmates me and you

.

Our love is like a rainbow

Always shiny bright and new

You're the sunshine; I'm the rain

I am surely blessed with you

.

Adapted from a poem by Jo Alexis-Hagues

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

My beautiful Liebling,

You are truly always present in my heart

And dreams of you greet me through the night.

It is said when the person you love,

lives in your dreams and stirs your passion so strongly you wake with a pounding heart,

and she’s waiting for you in your next dream filled night with a smile and loving embrace...

You’ve found your soulmate !

For me, this has been proven many times.

Laura, you truly are my beautiful Soulmate!

I love you deeply Laura ❤️❤️❤️❤️

@dreamiingofher

@adelleandlaura4ever