#I look forward to sharing it with you soon!

[sowerpatch]

terms of play [chapter 10 - undefined play]

Paige Bueckers x Azzi Fudd

Summary: Azzi Fudd built the Golden Valkyries on a dare, but drafting Paige Bueckers was all strategy. Fresh off an NCAA title, Paige is everything the team needs—and everything Azzi shouldn’t want.

Officially, it’s all business. Unofficially, it’s glances that linger too long and touches that mean too much.

Author's note: this is an AU where Azzi owns the Golden State Valkyries and drafts Paige. Azzi's family are all original characters. Also, Azzi is three years older than Paige.

*CHAPTER LIST HERE*

Chapter Summary: Paige and Azzi aren’t defining anything—yet. But between late-night visits, borrowed clothes, and quiet moments that last too long, something begins to take shape. It’s not just flirting anymore, not just comfort. It’s the way Azzi watches her postgame, the way Paige never asks her to stay but always hopes she will. A midnight ice cream run turns into a public risk. A kiss becomes something more. And when they finally cross that line, it’s clear what’s between them is already more than just a moment.

Warning: Sexual content

Word Count: 4,741

Paige’s apartment, Oakland. July 2025. 

Azzi lingered just inside the doorway, one hand still on the frame. The takeout bag swayed slightly in her grip. She looked at home in nothing at all that belonged here—perfectly pressed trousers, designer flats, a blouse with pearl buttons Paige could never afford but had imagined slipping off her once or twice. Her expression, as always, gave away nothing. 

Paige tilted her head. “If you came all this way just to watch game tape, you picked the wrong night.” 

Azzi didn’t smile, but her mouth quirked, just enough. “I was in the neighborhood.” 

“In this neighborhood? With takeout from that overpriced Thai place I told you I liked three weeks ago?” 

Azzi raised the bag slightly, like it answered the question. “You’re the one who said it was life-changing.” 

Paige stepped aside, eyeing her with mock suspicion. “Fine. You’re lucky I’m starving. Come in.” 

Azzi moved past her, too calm for someone who clearly hadn’t planned to leave anytime soon. Paige shut the door behind her, leaned against it, and watched as Azzi took in the space like she was cataloguing it.  

She’d been here before—but never like this. Never at night, with the lights dimmed and the couch already folded out. Never with her heels off, hair down, cardigan sliding off her shoulders like she was letting something go. 

Dinner passed in a blur of shared containers and offhanded commentary. Azzi ate with her usual elegance. Paige sat cross-legged on the floor, dipping spring rolls into peanut sauce and talking too fast, too loud, but Azzi didn’t seem to mind. 

Azzi had changed into one of Paige’s old oversized sweatshirts, charcoal gray and soft with wear. It fell differently on her, sleeves pushed just past the wrist, collar slipping to one side every time she leaned forward.  

Paige got up, sat beside Azzi and had made a show of pretending to stretch. Her arm thrown across the back of the couch like she wasn’t looking for any excuse to feel closer. 

Azzi wasn’t playing along, but she wasn’t pulling away either. 

“Comfortable?” Paige asked, nudging her thigh with a sock-covered foot. 

Azzi didn’t glance up. “Barely.” 

“That’s a lie,” Paige ginned “Five-star hospitality. Couch with the least amount of structural support. Ambience set to ‘early dorm room.’ I’ll be expecting a Yelp review.” 

Azzi finally turned her head. Her expression was unreadable, but there was a hint of something lighter tucked into the corner of her mouth. 

“You’re ridiculous.” 

“And yet you’re here.” 

Azzi looked away, but the curve of her smile deepened just slightly. Her fingers curled around the stem of the glass but didn’t lift it. 

They sat like that for a stretch. The only sound was the low hum of something on TV neither of them were really watching. Paige rested her elbow on the arm of the couch, head tilted so she could watch Azzi without being obvious about it. The soft light brought out the fine shadows beneath her eyes, the angle of her cheekbone, the way her hair brushed against her jaw. 

“You know,” Paige said, voice lower now, “you don’t have to leave.” 

Azzi 's fingers tightened slightly on the wine glass before setting it aside. 

“I mean,” Paige added quickly, “you can. Obviously. This isn’t a trap. It’s just... late. And you’re already wearing my shirt. Which, for the record, I didn’t offer. You just took it.” 

Azzi shifted, turning more toward her. “You left it on the bed.” 

“That’s not consent.” 

“You left it folded.” 

“Still not consent.” 

Azzi gave her a dry look, but Paige caught the way her eyes softened around the edges. 

“You could stay,” Paige said again, quieter this time. “I’d like that.” 

Azzi studied her, lips parted like she was holding something back. Her posture had relaxed, but only slightly, like her body was still trying to decide how safe it was to let go. 

“I wasn’t planning to,” Azzi said. “I didn’t bring anything.” 

“You brought your pretty face,” Paige said. “Everything else is negotiable.” 

Azzi laughed softly, a real one this time. Paige saw the way her shoulders lowered, the weight sliding off bit by bit. Azzi’s gaze dropped to the blanket stretched across Paige’s lap. Her hand moved toward it, slow and deliberate, brushing against Paige’s knuckles. 

“I wouldn’t mind staying,” she said, almost under her breath. 

Paige lit up like someone had flipped a switch inside her chest. 

“I’ll get you the good pillow.” 

Azzi was already leaning into her, her body folding into Paige’s side like it had always known the shape of it. 

“I already stole it,” she murmured. 

Paige pretended to be appalled. “Unbelievable. She breaks my heart, drinks my wine, and steals my best pillow.” 

Azzi didn’t answer. She just rested her head on Paige’s shoulder. Her hand stayed where it was, fingers loosely tangled with Paige’s. 

Paige closed her eyes and smiled to herself, her cheek resting lightly against Azzi’s hair. It wasn’t loud or messy or complicated. It was soft, simple, and steady in a way Paige had never let herself want before. 

She could get used to this. 

- 

Fudd Holdings, San Francisco. August 2025. 

The monitor on the wall played the postgame feed in high definition, and Paige looked like she always did after a win—flushed. Her hair still damp from the locker room with that crooked grin working just a little too well. Her tone with the reporter was flippant, easy, but her eyes burned with focus. She looked steady. She looked like herself. 

Azzi sat at her desk, arms loose against the armrests. The binder beside her remained untouched. She wasn’t pretending to review it anymore. 

Nika sat on the couch with her laptop open, though she hadn’t typed in minutes. She tilted her head toward the screen, but her eyes cut back to Azzi. 

“You’ve been staring at her like that since tip-off.” 

Azzi didn’t look away. Paige reached off-camera and said something to someone, laughing as she took her water bottle. The sound from the speakers wasn’t loud, but Azzi could hear her tone like it was in the room. 

“She’s the face of the franchise.” 

“Sure,” Nika said, voice lighter now. “And you’re watching her like she’s the reason your world turns.” 

Azzi kept her expression neutral. She reached for her pen and turned it slowly in her fingers. The room carried a stillness that wasn’t empty. 

“She played well.” 

“She played fine.” Nika stretched her legs out. “But you’re playing yourself harder.” 

Azzi finally looked at her, brows raised just slightly. 

Nika grinned. “You two are a thing now?” 

Azzi’s fingers paused on the pen. “What makes you think that?” 

Nika sat up a little straighter, eyes narrowing in mock suspicion. “Because I know you. And because when I came by last week, you were wearing sneakers. Not designer flats. Sneakers. Like a real person. That only ever happens when she’s around.” She tilted her head, grinning. “Also, you had takeout containers on your counter that looked suspiciously like the kind Paige orders. And you were humming.” 

Azzi didn’t deny it. That was the worst part. 

Nika leaned in. “Azzi Fudd. Humming.” 

Azzi let out a soft exhale. Not quite a sigh. More like the release of something she had been holding in longer than she meant to. 

“She calls me her non-girlfriend girlfriend.” 

That got Nika to straighten. Her smile sharpened with interest. 

“Oh. So we’re at terms now. Non-girlfriend girlfriend. That’s—” she laughed, sitting back against the cushion, “—actually kind of adorable. Vaguely tragic, but adorable.” 

Azzi’s lips curved faintly, almost in spite of herself. Her voice stayed level. “It’s not official. But… we’re seeing each other.” 

Nika raised an eyebrow, then shrugged. “Okay. Then what’s stopping you from being not non-girlfriend girlfriend and just being actual girlfriends?” 

Azzi didn’t answer immediately. Her gaze returned to the screen, though the video had ended, and Paige’s face was gone. But the memory of it lingered—the way she looked in a postgame win, unfiltered joy behind all the cocky one-liners. 

She lowered her pen to the desk, hand resting flat beside it. 

“I don’t know how to be someone’s girlfriend when I’m still owned by so many expectations.” 

Nika was quiet now, but it didn’t feel like pressure. She stood and walked to the desk, resting her forearms on the edge. 

“Maybe stop trying to be owned by anything at all,” she said. “You already know what you want.” 

Azzi’s eyes met hers. The look wasn’t defensive. It wasn’t even uncertain. It was soft, like she had been cracked open but hadn’t broken. 

“I just want to protect her,” Azzi said. 

“Then don’t protect her from you,” Nika replied. “Protect her with you.” 

Azzi nodded once, barely more than a movement, but it was there. Nika reached for her bag, her tone softening into something almost fond. 

“She calls you her non-girlfriend girlfriend.” She smiled. “But she’s ready for the real thing.” 

- 

Azzi’s condo, San Francisco. August 2025. 

Azzi had nearly finished her chapter when the sound of the bathroom door creaked open. She didn’t glance up right away, too familiar now with Paige’s rhythm around the condo. The sound of bare feet padded into the living room, followed by a low huff and the unmistakable thud of someone flopping dramatically onto the couch. 

Paige sprawled out across from her, hair still messy from her game-day ponytail, a loose vintage UConn tee hanging a little too perfectly over her frame. The shirt had tiny holes near the hem, like it had survived a dozen road trips. She looked smug. She looked like trouble. 

Azzi’s eyes stayed on her book. 

“We’re going out,” Paige said. 

“No,” Azzi replied calmly, eyes not lifting from the page. 

Paige leaned forward, elbows on her knees. “Don’t you wanna know where?” 

“I already know where this is going.” 

“Wrong.” Paige grinned, proud of herself. “This is new and inspired. I’m taking you on a midnight ice cream run, babe.” 

Azzi’s expression barely shifted, but her gaze flicked upward, slow and unimpressed. “You’re not serious.” 

“I’m always serious about sugar and chaos.” 

Azzi blinked once. “We have ice cream here.” 

“But not the experience. Neon lights, weird toppings, the joy of watching me flirt with you too loud in public. That’s the real dessert, ma.” 

“Absolutely not.” 

“Come on. The shop on Seventh is still open. You love that boring vanilla.” 

“I prefer simple.” 

“You prefer denial.” 

Azzi snapped the book shut. 

Paige leaned over the arm of the couch, smile sharpening. “You’re scared someone’s gonna see us together.” 

Azzi’s lips parted slightly, but she said nothing. 

“That’s it, huh?” Paige stood, stretching with dramatic flair. “You’re worried we’ll be on some Twitter thread. 'Billionaire caught smiling at WNBA rookie. More at ten.'” 

Azzi looked up at her fully now. The tension in her shoulders was subtle, but there. “You know what happens when people think they have something to whisper about.” 

“Then let them whisper,” Paige said. “Or I can just go alone and pretend I’m heartbroken. One scoop of pity sprinkles, please. My non-girlfriend girlfriend left me in the cold.” 

Azzi exhaled, but the edge of a smile broke through. 

“I’m not dressed for outside.” 

“You look like a Bond villain on her night off,” Paige said, motioning to Azzi’s perfectly draped cardigan and black joggers. “You’re more than fine, babe.” 

Azzi stood with reluctant grace. She moved to grab her keys from the entry table. 

Paige raised her brows. “Wait, that worked?” 

“You’ve worn me down.” 

“Like I planned.” Paige grinned, slipping her phone into her back pocket. “If we end up on DeuxMoi, I get to pick the picture they use.” 

The walk was quiet, peaceful. Azzi kept her hood up, her hands tucked deep in her pockets. Paige walked beside her without touching, close enough for the warmth to reach. On the third accidental brush of their hands, Paige let her pinky hook around Azzi’s.  

A test. 

Azzi didn’t pull away. 

The ice cream shop was near empty. Paige immediately ordered the most chaotic thing on the menu—brownie fudge sundae, caramel drizzle, sour gummy worms—and smiled smugly as she turned back to Azzi. 

Azzi kept her order plain. Vanilla, one scoop, no toppings. 

“You’re really living on the edge,” Paige teased, licking her spoon. 

“Some of us don’t need our dessert to scream for attention.” 

They ate on the bench outside, plastic spoons tapping gently against their cups. The city hummed around them but never too loud. Paige nudged Azzi’s shoulder with hers. 

“You okay?” 

Azzi hesitated. Then she nodded. “I didn’t expect it to feel this normal.” 

“That’s because it is.” 

Paige scooped another bite, then offered her spoon to Azzi without thinking. 

Azzi took it. Slowly. Her lips brushed the edge, her gaze unreadable. 

Paige’s breath hitched. 

“I’m still scared,” Azzi said, voice quieter now. “But I didn’t hate tonight.” 

“Good.” Paige smiled at her, soft and unguarded. “Because I’ve got at least a dozen more dates like this planned.” 

Azzi rolled her eyes. 

“You’re exhausting.” 

Paige bumped her knee. “You’re really pretty.” 

“You’re impossible.” 

“And you still like me.” 

Azzi didn’t reply. Instead, she held Paige’s gaze for a moment longer than she meant to. 

It was enough. 

The night held them still for a few seconds more. Paige kept eating. Azzi watched her, looking as though maybe—just maybe—being seen like this wasn’t the worst thing in the world. 

- 

Azzi’s condo, San Francisco. August 2025. 

Azzi stood in front of the mirror, cotton pad in hand, smoothing a rose-colored toner across her cheekbones. She wore an oversized navy crewneck that hung loose around her hips, the sleeves pushed up her forearms. Her black lounge shorts barely showed beneath the hem. The scent of night cream and jasmine hung lightly in the air, mixing with the warm quiet of the condo. 

Behind her, Paige leaned against the doorframe of the bathroom, dressed in light grey UConn sweatpants and a crisp white Nike tank top that clung to her frame. Her hair was pulled into a messy bun, damp at the edges from a quick rinse. She had that familiar smirk tugging at her lips, arms folded, eyes tracing every small movement Azzi made with idle fascination. 

"You always look like you’re about to shoot a skincare commercial,” Paige said, chin lifting. “Do I need to dim the lights? Cue the wind machine?” 

Azzi kept her focus on the mirror, a faint smile curving at the edge of her mouth. “I’ve seen your idea of skincare. You washed your face with hand soap last week.” 

“It was eucalyptus,” Paige shot back. “Fancy. Exfoliating.” 

Azzi turned just enough to glance over her shoulder. “It’s drying.” 

“And you’re hot,” Paige said, stepping further in. “We can’t all be perfect.” 

Azzi gave a soft laugh, lowering the cotton pad onto the counter. Paige moved to stand behind her, looking at their reflection. Azzi met her eyes briefly before glancing down. 

“You missed a spot,” Paige murmured, reaching up to touch Azzi’s cheekbone gently. 

Azzi stilled, her breath catching just slightly. “Where?” 

Paige didn’t answer. She leaned in and kissed the corner of her mouth instead. 

It was soft, like testing the water, like remembering how many times they’d almost done this and choosing not to wait anymore. Azzi turned fully into her, hands sliding up Paige’s sides as if pulled there without thought. Paige’s palms pressed to her lower back, grounding them both. 

The second kiss was slower, deeper. Azzi tilted her chin up, lips parting to welcome the weight of it. She kissed like it was something sacred, like she didn’t trust the moment to last unless she carved it into memory. Paige felt her entire chest tighten as their mouths moved together in rhythm, steady and full of something tender and raw. 

Azzi backed up slightly until her hips touched the edge of the sink. Paige followed her, hands slipping under the hem of her sweatshirt, fingers resting lightly on her bare waist. She could feel Azzi trembling slightly beneath her touch, not from nerves, but from release. It had taken so long to get here, through weeks of dancing around what they both knew. 

Azzi kissed her again, this time with hunger. One hand curled into the fabric of Paige’s tank top, pulling her closer until there was no space between them. Paige groaned softly into her mouth, one hand rising to cup the side of Azzi’s face, thumb grazing her jaw. The other slipped down to Azzi’s thigh, fingertips brushing bare skin. 

Azzi let out a breath against her lips. “Do you want to stop?” 

Paige pulled back just enough to look at her. Her voice was low, sure. “Only if you tell me to, baby.” 

Azzi didn’t answer. Instead, she pulled Paige in again, kissing her with everything she hadn’t said out loud. 

Paige kissed her back like restraint had finally snapped. Mouth hungry, hands firm, tongue sliding past Azzi’s with intention.  

She crowded Azzi back against the counter, her body pressed close enough that Azzi could feel the slight tremble in her thighs. Every movement felt deliberate. Every breath between them was charged. 

Azzi clung to her, hands locked behind Paige’s neck, mouth parted as she met each kiss with growing need. The edge of her shirt slipping off her shoulder. Paige kissed there, then lower, dragging her teeth just enough to draw a sharp inhale. 

“So beautiful, ma.” Paige muttered, her voice rough, her hands moving over Azzi’s sides, then gripping her hips. “It’s making me lose control.” 

Azzi met her eyes, her lips still parted, her breath uneven. “I want you to lose control.” 

That did something to Paige. 

She gripped beneath Azzi’s thighs, lifted her with ease, and placed her on the bathroom counter. Azzi let out a soft sound, startled by the sudden height, her legs instinctively wrapping around Paige’s hips for balance. Her shorts rode up, smooth skin against the marble, her body fully exposed to the warmth between them. 

Paige stepped in close, settling her hands on Azzi’s thighs. Her thumbs brushed the inside, teasing little circles higher and higher, never quite reaching where Azzi wanted her. She kissed her again, slower now, more drawn out. Her lips trailed from Azzi’s mouth to the corner of her jaw, down the line of her throat, then across her collarbone. She took her time as she lifted Azzi’s shirt. 

Once the oversized cloth was thrown nearby, Azzi’s hands threaded into Paige’s hair. She was holding her close as Paige kissed down her chest, using her mouth like she was learning every inch.  

“Still good?” Paige murmured, her voice low, nearly a growl. 

Paige brought her mouth to bare skin, tongue tracing the curve of her breast, lips soft at first, then firmer. Azzi arched gently, her breath hitching when Paige’s teeth grazed her. 

Azzi answered without hesitation. “Yes. Keep going.” 

That was enough. 

Paige moved her mouth down again, kissing her stomach, her hips, pausing just above the waistband of Azzi’s shorts. Her hands gripped beneath them now, thumbs hooked just inside the soft cotton. She didn’t pull them off. Not yet. She nuzzled into the space just above, breathing her in. 

“You’re driving me crazy,” she whispered. 

Azzi’s legs tightened around her. “Then do something about it.” 

Paige laughed softly, but it cracked a little at the edges. Her restraint was thinning by the second. 

She slid one hand between Azzi’s legs, touching her lightly through the shorts. Her fingers moved with care, exploring the heat already gathered there. The fabric was damp. Paige stilled for a moment, pressing in just enough to make Azzi gasp. 

“God,” Paige muttered. “You’re already soaked, ma.” 

Azzi exhaled a shaky breath, gripping Paige’s shoulders. Her thighs trembled against Paige’s ribs. She tried to rock forward, to chase the friction, but Paige only applied light, teasing pressure with the pad of her fingers. 

She moved in slow circles, keeping the touch maddeningly soft. 

Azzi’s head fell back against the mirror, her mouth falling open. Paige kissed the inside of her knee, then higher, and higher again. Her hand stayed steady, fingers never rushing, never greedy. Just steady heat, coaxing her open. 

“You want more?” Paige asked, lifting her head just enough to meet her eyes. 

Azzi swallowed hard, chest rising with each breath. “Yes.” 

Paige smiled and finally eased her hand beneath the waistband, past the last layer between them, and touched bare skin. 

Azzi jolted. The breath she took caught hard in her throat, and her legs flexed around Paige’s shoulders. Her body had already been warm, trembling, but this contact was different. This was bare. Direct. Intimate in a way that made her stomach twist and her hips rise without permission. 

“Fuck,” Paige whispered, her voice gone low and reverent. “So wet for me.” 

Azzi’s fingers gripped the edge of the counter, knuckles white. She tried to say something, but all she managed was a fractured inhale. 

Paige kept one hand braced under Azzi’s thigh, steadying her. The other moved slowly, teasing her folds with two fingers, sliding through her with care, not pressing in yet. She watched Azzi’s face the entire time. The way her head tipped back again, the way her lips parted just enough to let out a quiet gasp, the way her entire body started tilting forward, instinctively chasing the pressure. 

“I’ve got you,” Paige murmured. 

She pressed in. 

Just her fingers at first, slow and shallow. Testing the give of Azzi’s body, feeling the warmth already slick and pulsing around her. She worked her way in with delicate persistence, curling just slightly, coaxing her open with each stroke. 

Azzi arched forward, legs trembling. Her hands reached for Paige’s shoulders without thinking, gripping her there like it was the only thing holding her upright. Paige stayed close, one hand still firm at her thigh, her mouth brushing soft kisses along Azzi’s stomach, just below her navel. 

The first full thrust of Paige’s fingers made Azzi whimper—sharp and breathless. Paige paused, then did it again, a little deeper this time. Her thumb shifted upward, pressing lightly against her clit, just enough to make Azzi shiver. 

“You okay, ma?” Paige asked, voice hoarse now. 

Azzi nodded, but she wasn’t steady. “Don’t stop.” 

“I wasn’t planning to.” 

Paige set a rhythm then, slow and grounding. Her fingers curled with every stroke, drawing out a moan from deep in Azzi’s chest. She kissed along her thigh again, then moved higher, mouth finding Azzi’s breast, taking her into her mouth while her fingers continued their work below. 

Azzi cried out softly, her body caught between two sensations—mouth and hand, tongue and pressure. She felt split open. Seen in a way that was dizzying. Her fingers slid into Paige’s hair, pulling gently, grounding herself as her hips started to move with the rhythm Paige set. 

“Just like that,” Azzi whispered, barely able to speak. 

Paige smiled against her skin. “I know, baby.” 

She fucked her slow but sure, every thrust precise. Her thumb moved with more pressure now, faster as Azzi neared the edge. Paige could feel the way her walls clenched around her fingers, how Azzi’s breath had turned to short, broken gasps. 

“You close?” she asked, pressing her mouth to Azzi’s neck. 

Azzi’s response was a frantic nod, followed by her entire body pulling tight, thighs trembling, muscles locking as the pleasure crested and broke all at once. She came hard, her moan caught against Paige’s shoulder, nails digging into her back as she shook through it. 

Paige didn’t pull away as she stood up. She kept her fingers inside, slowing her hand until Azzi was breathing again, her body softening against her. 

Azzi slumped forward, arms slipping around Paige’s neck, holding her close. Her breath was hot against Paige’s ear. Paige kissed her temple and held her there, one arm wrapped fully around her back now, steadying her on the counter. 

Neither of them spoke. 

Paige let her come down slow, her fingers finally easing out. She helped Azzi rest back against the mirror, her thumb brushing gently over the inside of her thigh. 

Azzi’s eyes fluttered open. Her lips were kiss-bruised, cheeks flushed, chest still rising fast. 

“You good, baby?” Paige asked softly. 

Azzi reached up, touching her jaw with trembling fingers. “More than okay.” 

Her breath was still coming in shallow waves when Paige pressed her mouth to her shoulder, lips lingering in the dip of bone and skin. Neither of them said anything, but the air between them was full—heavy with heat, the weight of what they’d just crossed, and the ache of what was still to come. 

Paige’s hands smoothed along the outside of Azzi’s thighs, then under, lifting her gently from the counter. Azzi wrapped her arms around Paige’s shoulders as she was carried out of the bathroom, legs still trembling slightly around Paige’s waist. Her body felt loose and overrun, but she didn’t want distance. She wanted more. 

The room beyond was dim. The bed was turned down but untouched, the sheets still neat. Paige lowered Azzi slowly onto them, kissing her once at the top of her chest before kneeling beside the mattress. She looked up at her—really looked—eyes raking over flushed skin, the bare torso, the shorts clinging to her hips. 

Paige reached up and tugged them the rest of the way off. 

Azzi lay back, her breathing just beginning to steady, but her eyes didn’t waver from Paige. There was no uncertainty anymore. Just want, thick and quiet between them. 

Paige leaned forward and kissed her stomach. Then lower. Her hands spread across Azzi’s thighs again, coaxing them apart. Her mouth followed the line of her hip, then the sensitive skin just beside it. Azzi shivered under her, fingers gripping the sheets. Paige watched her, her voice a low murmur against her skin. 

“You look so good like this.” 

Azzi didn’t speak. Her lips parted, her eyes hazy as Paige kissed just above where she had touched her before. Teasing again. Slower now. This was about savoring. About learning what it meant to be wanted completely. 

Paige slid her tongue through her folds, a soft, wet stroke that made Azzi’s hips lift from the bed. Paige held her in place and did it again, slower this time, tongue pressing deeper, flatter. Azzi moaned, head falling back into the pillow, one hand sliding into Paige’s hair. 

Paige licked into her with the same rhythm her fingers had found earlier, steady and precise, drawing out sounds Azzi had never made. She dragged the tip of her tongue up to her clit and circled, teasing, then wrapped her lips around it and sucked gently, then harder when Azzi’s hips jumped. 

“God,” Azzi whispered. “Paige…” 

Paige responded by gripping her thighs tighter and going deeper. 

Azzi fell apart again slowly, unraveling under each stroke of Paige’s tongue, every flick and pull perfectly paced. Her whole body arched when Paige flattened her tongue and pressed harder, dragging her mouth across her until Azzi could barely breathe. 

She came again with a sharp, involuntary cry, thighs clenching around Paige’s shoulders, one hand fisting the sheets and the other still locked in Paige’s hair. Paige kept going until the spasms faded, until Azzi’s body slumped back onto the mattress, twitching with aftershocks. 

Only then did Paige slow, her kisses softer now, mouth gentle as she kissed the inside of Azzi’s thigh, the space just above her mound, the curve of her hipbone. She moved up slowly, body skimming against Azzi’s until they were face to face again. 

Azzi opened her eyes, dazed and soft, skin flushed and dewy. She reached for her, fingers sliding up the back of Paige’s neck. 

Paige didn’t speak. She just kissed her, deep and quiet, letting Azzi taste herself on her lips. 

Azzi’s hand moved to her waist, pulling Paige over her, wrapping both arms around her back. Her voice was low, nearly swallowed against Paige’s mouth. 

“Your turn.” 

Paige smiled into the kiss. “Yeah?” 

Azzi nodded. “Now, you make me want to lose control.” 

Paige kissed her again, then rolled her hips once, slow and firm, letting Azzi feel just how badly she wanted it too. 

“Whatever you say, boss lady.” 

[yerimacoustic]

𝙗𝙖𝙙 𝙙𝙚𝙨𝙞𝙧𝙚 ♡ jeonghan x reader

❝ i eagerly await your permission to taste you, as long as that may take ❞ 🥀 ﹒⊹

plot summary : you can’t decide if it’s the worst or perfect time for a vampire to whisk you away from the life you’re all too familiar with.

content warnings : jeonghan x reader, vampire au, regency/dark fantasy au, vampire!jeonghan x princess!reader, featuring wonwoo and joshua, love at first sight, might be kinda rushed (sorry), suggestive scenes/making out but no smut, mentions of blood because duh, wonwoo is a bit of an ass but only for drama/entertaining purposes, angst, yearning, cursing, betrayal, cheating, 14.2k wc!

author note : i’m running for the hills after posting, this is my first time writing a vampire fic i’m so sorry if it’s cringey 😭 not proofread

it was like waking up from an unfathomable nightmare and immediately searching for a single flicker of light to bring you even a semblance of comfort. of reality. but when he woke up that day, his chest felt empty, his entire body felt cold.. it was nauseating, nerve-wracking, to say the least. for a moment, he wondered if he was stuck in some sort of cruel purgatory.

his home was much darker than he remembered. not a single sliver of sunlight was permitted to peek through the windows, the curtains now bolted to every corner of the large windows. he knew it was daytime, somehow, but he felt a strange sense of exhaustion. 

then his friend walked through the door.. but he wasn’t as happy to see him as he had expected. somehow, at a single glance, his friend looked different, his usual friendly countenance diminished. his friend parted his lips but remained silence, as if the two of them shared an unspoken sense of dread. it confused him, made him wonder just how much had changed when he was asleep.. 

in a brief passing, just as he was pushing the quilts forward, he saw it. a flash of painful memories nearly sent him falling back against the pillows again- and suddenly it all became too clear. he stared again at the marks on his wrist in a fit of rage and came to realize this new life ahead of him was anything but a cruel purgatory. 

for at least, for some, purgatory would eventually come to an end. 

–

the chandelier shone bright above the crowd, the polished marbled floor beneath your feet somehow glistening even more so than usual. even with hundreds of guests dancing gleefully through the room, there wasn’t so much of a scratch on the tile. though you were hardly interested to find out what went into cleaning your fiance’s ballroom floor.

you stared down at your pasteled tulle skirts in a daze, wondering how you’d come to let a perfectly good outfit go to waste. across the room, wonwoo discussed business, finance, strategy.. anything he figured you couldn’t be bothered to hear. especially on the night your engagement was to be formally announced.

you should have been happier. it was a momentous occasion, an important milestone for many, not just royalty. strangers from both yours and wonwoo’s kingdoms joined together to celebrate your future union. you weren’t just promised to him but a life of stability, comfort.. yet you should have been happier.   

one thing that would have made you happier, for example, was if your fiance shared even one dance with you. it seemed that the two of you went through the motions of your speedy engagement in different ways, with him evidently viewing it only as a transaction. which, in all fairness, it was exactly that.

you soon came to find out there was only so much you could take. you managed to sneak out of the ballroom without anyone noticing, furthering away from the crowd until all you could hear was the echoed tapping of your heels against the floor. 

there was nothing like a breath of fresh, night air, especially after hours of suffocation. the crisp autumn air was refreshing, rejuvenating, almost- even if you had left your shawl inside. you chased the wonderful feeling of freedom the further you stepped into the unfamiliar gardens, the full moon high above your head mistifying, to say the least.

“it’s beautiful, isn’t it?” 

a cool, low voice not two feet behind you startled you out of your daze. you turned around, only to find the culprit was just as handsome as he sounded. fluffy blonde hair, elegant and striking features, dark eyes that shone beautifully in the moonlight.. he wore elegant black robes, covering every inch of his skin. incredible- you had barely shared any words, yet he seemed to be the most elusive figure you had and ever would lay your eyes on. 

“yes,” you suddenly coughed out, a short chuckle leaving your lips soon after. “yes. it is..”

the man, noticing your flustered state, chuckled knowingly and took a single step closer. “my apologies. i didn’t mean to startle the queen-to-be.”

you tilted your head, finally noticing the crimson in his eyes. his irises were the deepest shade of red imaginable, just like rubies.. it was unlike anything you’d ever seen before. “how do you know who i am?” 

he chuckled again, sending a chill down your spine. “i saw your tiara and took a leap of faith. besides.. everyone in the kingdom knows who you are.” 

“maybe you’re right. even so.. it’s unfair,” you started, struggling to speak as eloquently as he did. “that you know who i am, yet i don’t even know your name.”

“jeonghan.” he spoke without hesitation, seemingly carrying enough confidence for the two of you. especially considering the skillful way he took your hand in his and pressed a kiss against your knuckles. his fingers were cold as they wrapped around yours, as if you’d plunged your hand in ice cold water, yet you couldn’t bring yourself to pull away. “it’s a pleasure to finally put a face to the name. such a gorgeous face, i might add.”

you furrowed your eyebrows, puzzled. “didn’t you-”

“gossiping remarks in the town square hardly do your beauty justice.” he smirked, as if he knew the flattering remark was more than a satisfactory explanation. after all, you were doing a terrible job masking just how flustered you felt.. 

“thank you,” you finally whispered, avoiding his gaze. a never ending sea of tall oak trees marked a plunge into darkness, one you had since been contemplating diving head first into. 

his gaze followed yours into the forest several feet ahead and he raised an eyebrow. “forgive me for sounding invasive, but shouldn’t you be inside? with your fiance?”   

“i suppose i should be,” you sighed, making no attempt to hide your apprehension. “but.. it’s a little suffocating in there at the moment. i just needed a moment to decompress, collect my thoughts.”

he smiled to himself, as if to be taking pride in the fact you had placed confidence in him. “that’s understandable,” he started, releasing a long breath. “you’re starting a new chapter in your life. that doesn’t always come easy.”

“i don’t mind change, not really,” you shrugged. “and i know how lucky i am. i just..wish i had more of a say in these types of arrangements.”

jeonghan nodded, briefly humming in contemplation. “so now, you’re just.. inattentively going through the motions of a life you didn’t sign up for. i know a little about what that’s like.”

“you do?” disbelief filled your tone as you raised an eyebrow.

he chuckled at your phrasing, stepping closer to you until one breath could have pressed your shoulder against his own. “yes. i may not be of noble blood.. but that does not mean i cannot try to understand those who are.”

his words were so vague, his tone so alluring, yet you couldn’t bring yourself to ask him to elaborate. especially once you were met with his beautiful crimson eyes again and ultimately left speechless- this stranger puzzled you in many more ways than one. his eloquent way of speaking was a perfect match for his beauty, positively alluring…

“i suppose.. i better go back inside. before the prince starts to suspect something,” you chuckled sheepishly, still struggling to hide your bashfulness. 

he watched you take a few steps towards the staircase before calling out to you, “so soon?”

you turn to him with a gentle smile, “well.. yes. it’s rather rude to keep my intended waiting, whether we’re in good spirits or not. wouldn’t you agree?”

he smirked broadly, twisting his lips in a way that made your heart race. “i do. but he doesn’t seem to pay you any mind, does he?” 

something rather dark clouded your mind and there was an unmistakable pang in your heart, whether it was brought on by confusion or something else entirely, you didn’t know. was the mysterious jeonghan a mind reader, or was he simply more intuitive than most? 

he continued, “otherwise he wouldn’t have left you out here, all alone. especially near a dangerous forest.. whether you’re in good spirits or not.” 

you couldn’t stop the smirk pulling at your lips as he repeated your words. “will you join me inside, then? i can’t, in good conscience, leave you out by this ‘dangerous forest.’”

his eyes briefly widened as he stared past your shoulder for a moment, the light from the lanterns illuminating his dark irises. it was a terrifyingly alluring sight, disappearing in a flash of lightning. he spoke coyly, “very well, if you insist.”

maybe you were imagining things, but the flames in the tiny candles throughout the hall seemed to expand from the moment he stepped past the doorway. there was a shift in the air, one that you couldn’t conjure the words to explain. and yet, you made a conscious effort to take his hand in yours the moment the two of you were in the ballroom. he seemed puzzled at first, as if you had caught him in a flustered state.

“share a dance with me?” you offered, admiring the depth of his fluffy white hair. 

he tilted his head briefly, giving rise to another devilish smirk. “i would be honored.”

it was an undoubtedly puzzling sight, the princess sharing a dance with a dazzling stranger on the night of her engagement party. you did your best to shrug off the judgemental glances and inquisitive stares, focusing only on the beautiful man leading you in circles around the dance floor. like everything he did, he led the waltz with skillful precision..and charm. for the knowing smile never left his lips. 

it felt strange trying to avoid his gaze when his chest lay nearly a breath away from yours. you quickly caught on to the cunning nature in his smile, chuckling to yourself. “you smile like you know something no one else in the room does,” you noted quietly. 

he laughed softly at your words and you could have sworn you saw the lanterns flicker one more time. “maybe i do,” he replied coyly.

you scoffed, “very well.. do you mind enlightening me?” 

he merely shook his head, the loose curls near his eyes shaking with the impact. he laughed again and it seemed to overshadow any other sound in the room. “no.. no i don’t think i will,” he finally answered with a snicker.

“you’re no fun,” you teased just before he twirled you under his arm. 

“on the contrary,” he whispered, just before his grip on your waist tightened ever so slightly. it seemed as though he spoke not to argue with you, but to make a promise..

the song eventually reached its end with the orchestra drawing on the last few notes. applause scattered throughout the room, prompting you to take two steps back from jeonghan and draw in a deep breath to collect yourself. something about the look of intrigue in his dark eyes pulled you in like a moth to the flame. 

you watched him part his lips and mentally asked yourself what he was about to say. run away with me? in a heartbeat.. 

“get away from her,” a deep voice not two feet behind your shoulder demanded. 

you, recognizing it immediately, whipped your head back. “wonwoo.. we were just-”

wonwoo ignored you, quickly reiterating his words in a much louder tone. “get away from her. i won’t ask again.”

jeonghan’s smile never faltered, giving rise to a new level of darkness in his eyes. “and why would i do that? i was under the impression we were to share another dance.”

wonwoo’s hand fell to his side to circle around the silver detailed hilt of his sword. unmistakable anger filled his narrowed eyes as he stared at jeonghan with nothing less than the deepest form of hatred. but why…? “you have no business being here. how did you even manage to get in here? you weren-”

“weren’t invited?” jeonghan offered with a snicker. “your lovely fiance was gracious enough to invite me in, actually.”

jeonghan’s words were filled with venom, leaving a sour taste in your mouth. you looked back and forth between the two of them with furrowed eyebrows. “i don’t understand..” you started dryly. “wonwoo, will you just tell me wh-”

“there’s no need for that,” wonwoo cut you off once again and gripped tighter to his sword, threatening to release it from its sheath at any moment. “jeonghan, leave. there’s no need to cause a scene.”

he took a single step backwards and hummed, as if in contemplation. although he could easily overpower anyone stupid enough to get in his way, there was no use in dealing with collateral damage. as boring as his night was turning out to be.. “very well. just remember.. you can’t get rid of me that easily now.”

he disappeared in the blink of an eye, a blur.. not even a cloud of mysterious smoke signalled his departure. a collective gasp filled the room and you, at a loss for words, released a heavy sigh as a pit formed in your stomach. your suspicions from the beginning had been confirmed: there was more to the beautiful stranger than met the eye.

not only were you frightened, confused about your encounter with the strange man, but you felt like a fundamental piece of information was missing. you turned to wonwoo, demanding, “how did you know his name? what is he?”

he appeared dejected, his frame slightly shrinking under your gaze. there was no excuse for him to ignore you now. “that, my darling,” he started in a weary tone, just as a light pattern of rainfall began to tap against the windows. “was a vampire.”

–

“you do realize how foolish your actions were tonight?”

your fiance, always the monotonous one, stood near your doorframe with his arms folded across his chest. you chuckled bitterly at the reflection in your vanity mirror; how fitting, it seemed, that the first time he bothered to visit your quarters was in order to scold you. nonchalantly, you brushed through your hair without bothering to focus on his eyes, even in the mirror. 

you argued, your tone slightly harsher than anticipated, “how was i supposed to know what he is?” 

“that’s besides the point; it’s the principle. you can’t just invite people into my-” he paused, clearing his throat. “-our castle without even discussing it with me first.”

you finally turned around to face him, your eyebrows furrowed. “maybe i would have taken better care to heed your request if i knew your kingdom was overrun with.. with vampires. i don’t remember you mentioning that at all in the arrangement, by the way.”

his shoulders noticeably stiffened at your words, the horrible notion of the monsters bringing a shiver down his spine. it was true; his kingdom, like many, had been crawling with vampires for centuries. but as far as you were concerned, none of your subjects had reported so much as a sighting of the terrifying creatures. you felt barely equipped to handle what would undoubtedly be a catastrophic attack, now that you had invited one in..

wonwoo stood in silence with his jaw clenched for a moment, pondering his next choice of words carefully. defending oneself against a vampire was bad enough, but an entire castle? how could someone be so foolish… “and if i remember correctly, the only concern your family had was the promise of more land and soil.” 

you clenched your jaw in an effort to hold your tongue. his words, however poisonous, had a hint of truth to them; your marriage was an arranged transaction. and it was becoming increasingly clear that wonwoo wanted desperately to remind you of it every day..

“so what happens now?” you finally asked, your voice slightly strained.

“there are two guards sanctioned outside your door. just.. stay in here for the night and you should be safe. and don’t leave this room unless permitted,” he instructed you without an ounce of sympathy in his tone. 

“good night,” was your acknowledgement as you turned back around to stare in the mirror. the moment you heard the door click shut several feet behind, a heavy, weary sight left your lips. knowing there was no chance of you getting any sleep that night, you took to studying the details of your reflection and wondering how you’d been paired with the most apathetic man in the realm. 

outside, the wind was getting harsher and harsher, blowing through the large trees planted near your balcony and seemingly knocking at the french doors and windows. the full moon shone brightly directly above the castle, casting shadows into your bedroom. not for the first time, you wished you weren’t a night owl. 

 it felt like you were waiting. waiting for something, or more accurately, for someone. although the windows were closed, you felt a chill run down your spine, giving rise to goosebumps that would form along your arms. your bright blue dressing gown was only a few steps away, draped over the dressing screen. yet.. you felt glued to your chair. 

hours must have passed before the wind all but ripped the balcony doors off their hinges, sending a harsh wave of frosty air through your bedroom. although you felt the effects of the cold, goosefleshed skin and slightly shaky hands.. it didn’t feel unwelcomed. actually it felt oddly comfortable. 

and then lightning struck, a flash of blinding light piercing through the space of your bedroom. yet, you might as well have welcomed the storm with open arms; the rain had always brought you comfort, after all. especially during sleepless nights.

“i do apologize for the interruption,” a clear voice behind you spoke smoothly, prompting your shoulders to stiffen. you could hear jeonghan, feel his presence directly behind the small vanity chair, yet he did not appear in the mirror in front of you. even so, you stared straight ahead, as if to make eye contact with his reflection.

“is it true, then?” you asked him while tugging at a loose thread on your sleeve.

he let out another chuckle, the sound going straight to your racing heart. “it seems like you already know.”

you drew in a breath as he rested his hands on your shoulders, his thumb brushing lightly against your collarbone. “i should have seen the signs,” you thought out loud. maybe you were as foolish as wonwoo claimed, for you made no effort to push jeonghan away..

he hummed, ���are you sure you weren’t just ignoring the obvious?” 

you furrowed your eyebrows gently in contemplation, reflecting on the first time you saw his deep red eyes, felt his cold hand against yours.. suddenly, you let out a halfhearted chuckle, “maybe you’re right.”  

although you couldn’t see his reflection, you could feel his gaze piercing into yours. you swore you could hear him smirk as he spoke lowly, “don’t beat yourself up, princess. based on what i now know about you, it seems as if you’re craving a little more of.. an adventure.”

“adventure?” you quickly shook your head, snickering. “i wouldn’t say that.”

“i would,” he countered gently. “you’re bored, princess. and who could blame you, with the man you’re expected to marry?”

you paused, watching your hair fall behind your shoulder in the mirror. although it appeared to move on its own, jeonghan’s fingers brushing gently through your achingly soft locks pulled you back into reassurance. “you think you can give me what i really want?” you asked him lowly, the faintest hint of amusement in your voice. 

he paused, leaning down just a little bit. you felt his breath brush gently against the shell of your ear, effectively sending yet another shiver down your spine. “i know i can.”

a soft breath barely left your lips before his own were on your neck, leaving a trail of feathery kisses in their wake. you tilted your head back, your eyelids falling shut with ease as you bore your throat to him. for a moment, he was cool, calm and collected, releasing a gentle sigh against your skin. he was determined to savor the moment for as long as possible, even if your pulse racing beneath his lips was louder to him than the thunder outside. his eyes were screwed shut as he fought with everything inside him to ignore his instincts, to let his sharp teeth only lightly graze the surface..   

the gentle prick prompted your eyes to open and you sat upright again, finally turning to face him. his pupils were dilated, his gaze intense.. but he seemed to immediately understand the place of unease you were coming from. 

“don’t worry,” he assured you with a gentle smile. “i’ll only take a bite if you really want me to.”

a gentle sigh left your lips after he spoke, loving nothing more than the thought of allowing him a taste. the collected way in which he spoke, the flushed look in his eyes, all of it almost tempted you to tilt your head back for him all over again. “while i like the sound of that,” you started breathlessly. “i’m not sure how wonwoo would feel about seeing the marks in the morning.”

he nodded while doing his best not to showcase his disappointment at the mention of your fiance. here you were, desperate to appease a man who paid such little attention to you.. “as you wish,” he whispered.

you shifted in your seat to face him better as he knelt upon the floor. he was now eye level with you, yet not nearly close enough, in his mind. you finally asked him quietly, “what are you really doing here?” 

“can i not pay a visit to a new friend of mine?” he asked, his eyes locked intently on yours. 

you scoffed lightly, tilting your head. “considering your teeth were almost in my neck, i’d be willing to guess your visits come with ulterior motives.”

he shook his head, his tone nowhere near as defensive as you expected. “as i told you; i eagerly await your permission to taste you, as long as that may take.”

you bit the inside of your cheek, trying not to let the promising notion go to your head; whether he intended the double entendre or not, you weren’t entirely sure. “you have a lot of restraint for a vampire.”

he laughed at your words, his eyes filling with amusement. “not all vampires are as vicious as they are in the fairytales, princess. some of them are just-”

“going through the motions of a life they didn’t sign up for?” you offered with a smirk. 

he paused, his expression filled with surprise. maybe it was all in his head, but the two of you seemed to understand each other much faster than anticipated. “yes,” he finally chuckled. “yes, you could say that.”

“be that as it may, wonwoo, the guards, they’re all preparing to take extra security members. it's dangerous for you here.”

he sighed, almost in defeat, before nodding his head. “i thought of that. that’s why i’m offering to take you somewhere with me.”

you chuckled, taken off guard by his words. “where?”

“for a drink, perhaps?” 

“i thought you only drank blood.”

he snickered again, shaking his head. “again, so quick to judge. i happen to enjoy red and white wines just as much as blood.”

as a quiet apology, you chuckled and sheepishly looked at your lap. “very well, where are we going for this drink?” 

he paused, lifting his hand to cup your chin between his thumb and index finger. his eyes immediately searched for yours as if he couldn’t stand a second being denied the sight. “my home, of course.”

—

soaring through the sky in the arms of a vampire was something that you’d never even dreamed about. he could have easily teleported back to the mansion while holding you tightly to his figure, but holding patience as a virtue, he opted instead for an extended flight above the forest. the rain seemed to disappear magically and for a moment, you wondered if he had something to do with it. 

the kingdom from several feet above was beautiful, tall trees scattered around open plains and tiny houses keeping their distances from each other- all the while, the cold wind blowing against your face remained gladly welcomed. suddenly, flying didn’t seem so unnatural. 

you weren’t expecting the vampire’s home to be a large, magnificent mansion. although its several towers were dark, looming, and slightly offputting to any onlooker and it appeared more worn down than wonwoo’s castle, you found it quite alluring. soft candlelight poured out of a handful of windows, signalling a comforting safe haven inside. 

he still cradled you close to his chest, one arm around your waist while the other relaxed under your knees, when his feet finally landed on the ground. although he wouldn’t admit it out loud, he suddenly felt unconfident about the outward appearance of his home. “it’s not much,” he started quietly. “but it’s home.”

“it looks lovely,” you assured him, smoothing your hand over his covered shoulder.

“well, then i’m glad it holds up to your standards.”

when he carried you gracefully to the large front door, it dawned on you that the sight of the two of you must be hilariously misleading to any potential onlooker. after all, you were still in your white nightgown with only a small dressing robe to shield you from the cold. and with the way he held you so close, you looked almost like his bride. for a brief moment, you wondered if he wrestled with the same thought process.

just as you suspected, the interior of his mansion was much more welcoming than the exterior. plush scarlet furniture at every corner, dimly lit candles and lanterns upon the walls and tables, pitch black curtains hanging from the windows, a bearskin rug in the center of the drawing room.. it was oddly..cozy.

you tightened your arms around his shoulders while taking in all of your surroundings. you’d never seen that much red in your entire life. a cold breeze coursed through the hall, prompting you to shiver in his grasp. he only chuckled, bringing you closer to his chest. “it gets a bit drafty in here sometimes.. but i’ll keep you warm.”

he set you down in favor of holding onto your hand and leading you near the fireplace. as he briefly left you to place a drink order with one of his servants, it dawned on you: although you were in enemy territory, you couldn’t remember a time in which you’d felt safer. 

he seemed to rejoin you as quickly as he left, sitting down next to you on the bear skin rug. you watched the flames flicker in his eyes, accentuating their redness.. “have you lived here for a long time?” you asked.

“my whole life,” he replied lowly. “this mansion has been passed down among my family from generation to generation.”

you took another look around, taking note of just how high the vaulted ceilings were.. yes, it appeared old, very lived in.. but you sensed that if those walls could have talked, there were many secrets yet to be shared. “it’s beautiful,” you reiterated, unsure of what else to say.

“thank you,” he chuckled, endearment in his tone.

only a few minutes passed before the drinks were finally delivered in exquisite black chalices. you grasped the goblet delicately, taking a look inside and staring deeply at its deep red contents..

“i promise its nothing more than ordinary red wine,” jeonghan assured you, taking the smallest sip from his own cup.

you chuckled, keeping your eyes locked with his own while taking a gentle sip, aiming to savor the taste. it was the richest red wine you had ever tasted, a sweet undertone proving to be more addicting than you could have imagined.. how fitting, it seemed, that the vampire knew were to find the perfect brands of red wine. 

“this is far from ordinary,” you noted, setting your goblet a few inches away on the floor. “where did you find it?”

he licked his bottom lip, the sight doing more to your heartbeat than it should have. “aren’t i allowed to at least have a few secrets?”

“very well.”

he set his chalice down near yours, using it as a less than discreet excuse to inch his way closer to you. for a moment, he said nothing, the gentle crackling of the fire before you filling the silence. his eyes remained fixed upon your figure, most notably your neck and jawline. he yearned for even the smallest taste, knowing you were most likely just as sweet on the inside as you were on the outside.. 

you, of course, feeling his intense gaze on you, turned to him with a small smirk. the fact that a real, living vampire was so clearly fixated on you was more flattering and ego-feeding than it should have been. “you have a history with wonwoo, don’t you?” you asked, effectively catching him off guard.

“yes,” he answered without hesitation. 

so your suspicions were correct. there was something concerning about the way wonwoo addressed him without even a flicker of fear in his eye. and of course, the fact that your fiance couldn’t have been bothered to tell you how he had come to know and despise the vampire. “will you tell me about it?” 

“no,” he replied, his tone just as sharp and quick as before.

you tilted your head, eyebrows knitting together as you tried not to showcase your annoyance outright. “and why is that?”

“because i’d much rather focus on you tonight, darling princess.”

just like that, your brief shift of annoyance melted away. how could it be possible that a man you’d met only hours ago proved to be more attentive than your own intended? were you really this starved for attention that you would allow yourself to venture inside a vampire’s home, territory that you were frighteningly unfamiliar with? 

you did your best to push those silly questions to the back of your mind, mirroring his actions and inching closer to him. but once his shoulder was pressed against yours, the breath seemed to be snatched from your lungs.. “why.. do i feel so drawn to you?”

he paused, lifting his hand once more to let his fingers graze against your jaw. the longer you stared in his deep red eyes, it only became more apparent that the vampire was insistent on devoting every ounce of his attention to you and only you. he soon whispered, “i could easily ask you the same thing.”

once his hand cupped your cheek, effectively reeling you in closer to him, you abandoned any sense of guilt preventing you from kissing the beautiful vampire in front of you. the last thing you thought about in depth before his lips met yours was the fact that your engagement was purely a transaction, it was anything but love. after that, your mind felt hazy, foggy, focusing only on the feeling of his lips against yours.

he kissed you slowly, deeply, as if determined to memorize you on every intimate level. your gentle sighs, the patterns in which your addicting lips, the feeling of your skin against his.. your nose briefly brushed against his as you tilted your head to kiss him at a better angle and he nearly saw stars. 

his hand glided down to your neck and he, too, felt as if the air had been snatched from his lungs. for he felt your blood rushing underneath his fingertips, he heard your heartbeat echo in his ears again, the effect of a mere kiss proving to excite you and intimidate you all at the same time. it was too tempting, too alluring.. yet he couldn’t bring himself to pull away. in fact, he only cupped your neck tighter with the one hand.   

the two of you were quickly snapped out of your collective daze when a tiny prick on your bottom lip prompted you to break the kiss. you were breathless, feeling a shockwave run down your arms as a result of the tiny little nibble he’d allowed himself, yet you couldn’t bring yourself to break away from him completely. 

“was that-” you whispered, taking a mental note of the way his pupils dilated once again. 

he only smirked faintly, allowing you the tiniest glimpse of his sharp, gleaming fangs. the hand on your neck slid into your hair, tangling themselves in the strands. “do you want me to stop?” 

you couldn’t deny how strangely alluring the sight of his fangs were. in an instant, he could change his mind and show his true colors, prove himself to be exactly what you were always warned about.. and yet, they weren’t so terrifying now that you were seeing them for yourself. and he made no attempt to catch you in a bad moment and drain your blood..

as soon as you saw him gently swipe his tongue across his bottom lip and inadvertently bare his fangs once again, your decision was made.

“no.” 

you moved your own hand to the back of his neck, pulling his lips right back onto yours. you quickly got lost in the kiss again, this one more passionate, more desperate than the last.

jeonghan smirked against your lips, doing his best to keep his hunger and desire at bay. it was too soon, too fast to steal from you just yet. for he had you exactly where he wanted you and he was going to take his time, enjoy every second of his attempt at retaliation. even if his patience was wearing incredibly thin..

–

you were back in your private room before the sun rose. although there was some falsehood to the legends and rumors about vampires, they did, apparently, avoid sunlight at any cost. you slept peacefully for about.. two hours before being abruptly awoken by your new handmaidens. they were nothing if not punctual, you’d soon come to realize. 

immediately upon waking up in your new home, you were filled with a sense of dread and longing.. jeonghan’s home was a perfect escape from your responsibilities. everything about the vampire himself was fantastical in every good sense of the word; every second with him felt like a dream. naturally, it was much preferred to waking up to your cold-hearted fiance.

even sharing a meal together felt like a formality. the two of you kept great distance as you ate in silence and avoided eye contact at any available opportunity. it was torture. 

“i trust you slept well?” wonwoo finally spoke up, though his voice suggested disinterest.

you paused before slowly nodding your head. you couldn’t tell if the lack of sleep or the memory of your shared night with jeonghan was the bigger issue playing in your distraction. “yes, partially. and you?”

“partially,” he replied dryly.

you nodded again, making no attempt to hide your own disinterest. your gaze fell to the large grandfather clock in the corner of the room- nightfall had never seemed so far away..

“i need you to do some studying today,” wonwoo abruptly spoke, once again pulling you out of your daze for better or for worse. “if you are to live here, you must learn to defend yourself against those.. monsters. especially now that we are forced to potentially coexist with one in this castle, no thanks to you.”

while pushing his scolding remarks to the back of your mind, you glared softly at him. “why can’t we just find someone to bless the castle? or move to a safe house, for that matter.”

“it’s not that simple,” he sighed in annoyance. “once you invite a vampire into your home, the only way to uninvite them is to transfer ownership of the property. which i do not intend to do. or.. to kill them.”

“which you.. do intend to do?” you asked hesitantly.

he paused, clenching his jaw as his gaze briefly fell to his plate. “i will do whatever’s necessary.” his narrowed eyes met yours. “if he comes after what’s mine, i’m afraid i’ll have no other choice. let’s hope, for everyone’s sake, that he makes the right decision and keeps to himself.”

‘what’s mine..’ for whatever reason, you hated the way those two words sounded. you realized quickly that he could have been talking about anything; his home, his jewels, his throne.. maybe even you. suddenly, you bit back a chuckle- there you were, thinking that he couldn’t have cared less what became of you. could he have proved you wrong? 

yet, you felt no ounce of regret or shame. in fact, you were wrestling with the temptation to tell him he was wrong about jeonghan more than the temptation to confess your secret affair. if that was even the correct word to use..

“will you ever tell me what happened between the two of you?” you asked, though deep down, you already knew the answer. especially as he rose to his feet and took a step back in avoidance.

“all you need to know is that he’s a monster. and you would do well to keep your distance from him.”

seeing nothing better to do after your shared meal, you took to the study to comply with wonwoo’s request. he had a surprising volume of books on vampire folklore and legends, making you wonder if any of them were filled with facts. you settled comfortably against the sofa near the lit fireplace; you had a feeling you would be in there for a while..

meanwhile, as sunlight poured through one study’s window in abundance, another room was filled with darkness. the curtains completely shielded the glass in jeonghan’s study, preventing even a tiny sliver of sunlight from sneaking into the room. he, too, felt simultaneously exhausted and restless somehow. 

as he paced back and forth, tossing a ripe green apple from one hand to the other, he sighed heavily. he should have known that exacting revenge on the would-be king would be no easy feat. he expected complications, maybe some curveballs.. but he never expected to fall for someone so quickly. and so intensely, at that.

his nervous state of mind was not lost on joshua, a man whom he’d always called his brother. joshua’s understandable fear of the sun prevented him from getting any sleep during the day, provoking him to keep a cautious, watchful eye around the castle. that particular day, his pattern seemed to come in handy.

“what’s troubling you? you are usually hard to find during daylight,” joshua noted, sitting comfortably on the dark red loveseat in front of jeonghan.  

“it’s all going according to plan,” jeonghan started, pausing his steps in favor of standing directly before his closest friend. “some parts are proving to be.. a little too easy. i can go inside the castle as i please. thanks to his bride-to-be.”

joshua furrowed his eyebrows, evidently confused. “i don’t understand-”

jeonghan sighed, his avoidant gaze drifting to the apple in his hand. the words felt heavy on his tongue, embarrassment flooding his veins and preventing him from replying straight away. “i can’t deny that i.. find her incredibly charming. alluring. in all honesty, i can’t even put it into words. a small part of me even feels guilty for using her blind trust in me to my advantage.”

“you’re.. in love with her?” joshua stiffened slightly on the couch, the confusion evident within his features. “that’s impossible. you haven’t even known her for an entire day.”

jeonghan lifted his chin with a tiny smirk, “really, joshua. after all we’ve seen, after all we’ve done.. you’re skeptical of a tiny thing like love at first sight?”

“you sound incredibly delusional.”

jeonghan turned his back on the other man with a heavy sigh, hunching his shoulders ever so slightly. “i knew you wouldn’t get it. i don’t know why i bother to tell you these things anymore.”

joshua laughed in disbelief, much to his friend’s annoyance. “i’m trying to be the sensible one here. you’ve waited for years, plotting every last detail.. you want to throw it all away for.. for what? a princess you have no chance with?” 

“i’m not saying i want to throw all my plans away,” jeonghan countered. “i..can have it both ways. i know i can.”

“you can’t,” joshua replied with another chuckle, rising to his feet. just as he reached the doorway, he sighed, turning back with his hand still on the cold doorknob. “for your own sake..i urge you to get your priorities in order. or you’ll spend the rest of eternity regretting it.” 

jeonghan chose to stay silent, allowing the door clicking shut to fill in the silence. he didn’t plan for this. he didn’t plan to fall so quickly, to let the hopeless romantic deep inside him take over.. he didn’t plan for you to be so beautiful and charming, and he definitely didn’t expect to feel guilty on your behalf. of course wonwoo never knew to appreciate a wonderful thing when he had it.

then of course, he wondered if he was telling joshua the truth. if he really could have it both ways.

–

within a few days, security measures around the castle had somehow heightened. the two guards never left your bedroom door, standing stoically in the hallway day after day. while you were weary of the two of them staying just outside your bedroom twenty four hours a day, you knew it was futile to request them to leave you alone. 

for wonwoo was growing more and more anxious by the day. the only time he didn’t have someone watching closely over you was at night time, when you were presumably asleep. you had a feeling it would only get worse after the wedding, which was only a few weeks away. naturally, it felt best to enjoy what little nights you had left with jeonghan, even if it did drastically ruin your sleep schedule.  

one night, you sat crosslegged on the vampire’s large, four poster bed with him only a few inches away from you. he let his gaze slowly drift all the way from your eyes to the bright pink dress you wore. what a light you were in his darkened home, a light that he suddenly didn’t want to dim. 

he wore a white, fluffy shirt that almost appeared as velvety as his blonde hair. his collarbones peeked from under the fabric, revealing more of his skin than you’d seen. you weren’t sure exactly why, but it begged the question, “is it..strange? not having any heartbeat.” 

“you’ve been studying.” he chuckled before shaking his head. “no. not entirely. just..feels a little empty.”

naturally, there were so many questions you wanted to ask him every time you came face to face with him. he could easily prove all of the books you’d been forced to read wrong. but there seemed to be no delicate way to approach any of them. 

“can i..” you started, your eyes falling to the ruffles in his shirt near his chest.

he didn’t waste a single breath before replying in a cool tone, “please.”

with his permission, you tentatively reached out to place your palm flat against his covered chest. sure enough, there was nothing there.. nothing but cold. you wondered how he could stand it. “you’re right,” you whispered. “how can you stand the cold?”

“you get used to it after a while,” he replied, and you soon realized how foolish it was to ask him such a question. you forgot all about the brief embarrassment, however, when he moved a hand to rest on your shoulder, just above your collarbone. you watched his lips part as he seemed hyperfocused on that area of skin, all of the blood beneath seeming to gather under his fingertips like a magnet. 

“you can hear it, can’t you?” you finally asked him, feeling your own heart race as his eyes seemed to cloud over with hunger. that action, alone, may have been enough of an answer for you.. but you simply loved to hear him speak. 

he nodded stiffly, “you’re so reactive. your heartbeat.. it’s like a thousand drums.”

you bit back the smirk tugging at your lips, his words shamelessly feeding your ego. “that’s just what you do to me.”

he sighed in return at your words, crimson eyes flicking back up to yours. “honestly..?”

“honestly,” you nodded with sincerity, tugging him closer by the ruffles on his shirt and chasing his lips with your own. the kiss lasted ten, maybe twelve seconds before he pulled away slowly, leaving you feeling strangely empty as the cold left you.

you never would have known he was wrestling with several dilemmas in his own mind. he remained focused entirely on you, as if to be wondering if you were truly sitting before him.. “you’re so.. enchanting.”

the breathless way in which he spoke, the way his gaze absentmindedly fell to your lips.. it could easily have made you faint. you instead moved your hand slowly up to his cheek, pulling a gasp from his lips as the warmth of your palm met his skin. “i’m not the one with powers.” 

he chuckled even though your words brought him back into reality all too quickly, and he lowered his chin ever so slightly. “i’ve enjoyed these nights with you very much. i just.. want to ensure that you are, too.”

you chuckled, his words sounding almost absurd to you. “of course i am. don’t you think i would have turned you away by now if i didn’t enjoy your company?” 

“fair point,” he nodded. “however.. with the matter of your engagement-”

“wonwoo and i are not in love, if that’s what you’re wondering,” you gently cut him off. really, the last thing you wanted was to talk about your fiance with him, but you complied, knowing it must have at least brought him a little comfort. “our engagement is purely out of obligation to our kingdoms. though i assumed you, the intuitive vampire, already knew that.”

of course.. he should have known the stoic prince carried no romantic feelings towards you. his only question was, would it complicate his own plans? would wonwoo really be so unbothered by the loss of a most precious princess?  

“well, i knew he was inattentive,” he started.

“but you didn’t know the details?”

“i can’t read people’s minds, princess, not fully. it’s more like i can read emotions. i know wonwoo to be cold, dismissive, and.. in turn i knew you to be deeply upset and lonely.” as the words left jeonghan’s lips, he felt a strange pang of guilt in his chest for the first time. it was unfamiliar to him, who had no heartbeat- clearly, he hadn’t planned this far ahead.

“and bored,” a half hearted chuckle left your lips just before your eyes searched for his again. suddenly, you wanted to push any notion of your life just outside his window to the back of your mind. “you say you can’t read people’s minds.. but could you read other vampire’s minds?”

he tilted his head to the side for a moment, biting back a beautifully knowing smile. “well.. it’s different for everyone. but i could, potentially, read the mind of a vampire that i’ve turned.”

his words stuck with you for a moment, his tone almost promising. although it felt, sometimes, that he understood you on many levels you hadn’t expected him too, there was a possibility he could come to learn even more about you. but would it feel invasive? or would it feel especially intimate? 

“at least, at that point, we’d be fully transparent with each other,” you hinted with a smirk. 

he immediately flashed a smile, finding delight in your words. it was almost too easy.. “i like your way of thinking.”

“there’s plenty more where that came from.”

with an arm around your waist, he pulled you closer, your words igniting a fire within him. the knowledge that you were so willing to even consider becoming like him was too much to bare, the thought of sharing eternity with you too tantalizing to ignore. even if it wasn’t originally his plan.. 

a sigh left his pouty lips before they were back on yours. he had no words in that moment, all of his thoughts fighting to the death in his own mind as he kissed you with every ounce of strength he had left. only a knock at the door pulled him out of his confusing trance and prompted him to break the kiss, his hand remaining on your cheek. 

“yes?” he sighed out in annoyance, pulling a chuckle from your lips.

joshua pushed the door open, his eyes filled with disapproval as he saw the two of you in such a tight embrace. yet, jeonghan couldn’t bring himself to pull away and even mask his dignity. “it’s nearly dawn. the princess should be on her way home soon.”

“yes, joshua, i’ll take care of it,” he replied dismissively, nearly making you laugh again.

joshua, however, was not amused. the distasteful look never left his eyes, his otherwise neutral gaze speaking louder than words. you felt slightly judged, realizing how compromising your position appeared to be.. although, the fact that  jeonghan didn’t seem to care less provided a small amount of comfort. 

“well, take care quickly,” joshua finally spoke, his tone low. as your eyes flicked back and forth between the two vampires, you wondered if they’d shared some sort of secret conversation you had no part of in the brief, passing silence. “we don’t need her fiance knowing who she really spends her nights with.”

he left the room before jeonghan could bite back with a rebuttal. instead, he turned to you with a remorseful, slightly reluctant gaze. you swore his grip on your waist grew tighter as he whispered, “i’d spend all my days and nights with you in a heartbeat.” 

you felt foolish for falling in love with someone so quickly, abandoning any sense of logic in favor of connecting with a phantom. speaking with him about the promise of a shared eternity felt almost childish.. yet incredibly tempting. “it sounds..truly wonderful.”

he must have sensed your hesitance for he slowly pulled back, studying your thoughtful gaze. “i know it’s fast..” he started, his hand soon finding your own. “why don’t you consider it carefully?”

“i will,” you promised, quickly bringing his hand to your lips and pressing a kiss against his knuckles. it was, truthfully, an empty promise- you knew you would have an answer by the end of the week. in all honesty, you had your answer as soon as he left you by your bedroom window. you knew you were hopelessly in love with him as you began to miss him from the second he left your side.

before the sun began to rise and you were within the security of your own chambers, jeonghan came to realize he would be remiss if he didn’t take a few extra peeks inside the castle. the castle that was technically his, in a round about way. soon, he was hidden near the large window in wonwoo’s office, where the crown prince worked tirelessly. 

jeonghan watched him in bitterness, realizing that he hated sharing with this man. he hated sharing the castle, the princess; it was never his plan. suddenly he remembered his vow, that he would rip everything away from wonwoo in a satisfying movement. and he rationalized that no matter how his own plans would change, the ending would be the same. 

for he was purely giving the prince the same treatment he, himself, had been given. 

–

“you’ve been acting strange lately.” 

you weren’t expecting a confrontation from wonwoo, of all people. you were certain that he was the last person in the castle that paid enough attention to you, therefore he would be the last to realize a shift in your behavior. yet there were some things even wonwoo couldn’t help but notice; you were notably sleepy during the day, skipping meals, mostly unable and unwilling to participate in simple conversation..

he couldn’t help but wonder if the upcoming wedding was a contributing factor. he was no stranger to experiencing cold feet, the feeling of unease only heightening now that it was more than a few days away. yet in his mind, you could have done a better job of hiding your apprehension.

you were quick to brush off his words, sighing, “i’m just tired. i haven’t been sleeping very well lately.”

this was odd; as far as wonwoo was aware, you barely participated in any of the wedding planning. granted, neither did he- “is the guest room not to your satisfaction?” he asked, his voice slightly strained.

“no, it’s perfectly fine,” you did your best to assure him, your tone slightly dry.

he paused, distracting himself with the scattered papers on his desk for a moment. he couldn’t let his confusion or his intrigue get the best of him, or worse, become blatantly obvious to you. the last thing he wanted was to give you the impression he cared a great deal about your feelings towards him, or your courtship in general- maybe it was a horrible tactic, but it stopped the lines from becoming too blurred.

yet, there was one question burning a hole in the back of his mind. he cleared his throat after a moment, crossing his arms over his desk. “have you.. by chance witnessed anything odd in the castle lately?”

you knew what (or better yet, who) he spoke of even with the lack of details. you leaned your head back against the arm chair, feigning contemplation. “not that i recall.. in all honesty, i’ve never felt safer in my life than i have during these last few weeks.”

“good,” he muttered in that all too familiar dismissive tone. though he was still unconvinced..

“have you?” you countered, raising an eyebrow.

“nothing worth noting,” he replied without taking his eyes away from the paperwork.

you chuckled, “if we are to be married, though, i think most things would be worth noting. if there’s something you wish to tell me, please say so at once.”

“it’s nothing, i swear it,” he replied a little too quickly. as always, though, he was quick to compose himself and momentarily hide his disdain. “i’m sure that if there’s anything amiss within these walls, it will present itself in its own way.”

you weren’t a fool; you knew that was his own way of hinting at you to tell him whatever secrets you may have buried within. but you remained silent; there was no definite way of telling your fiance that you were planning on leaving him for a vampire you barely knew. 

to leave wonwoo was to leave an agreement, a transaction, at the risk of bringing corruption to your kingdom. to leave the world you knew behind in favor of an eternity of unfamiliarity.. yet you couldn’t get the promise of eternity with someone as attentive and enchanting as jeonghan out of your mind. especially with every moment you sat silently in the library with said fiance..

you wished you could read wonwoo’s mind as you watched him slump over his desk, devote his entire attention to his work. did he truly suspect you of something? or did he have a confession of his own that he was harboring?

–

it was particularly cold that night, even with jeonghan’s large black cloak draped over your figure. he walked slowly by your side, clearly unbothered by the icy breeze even as it blew against his thin white blouse. for a moment you envied him; even if a part of you had always enjoyed the fall and winter time, you wished there was an easier way of walking through it completely unbothered.

“why did you take me out here, again?” you asked, tugging the heavy material of the coat closer to your chest. 

he chuckled a little bit, draping his arm around your shoulders after hearing the slight warble in your tone. it was a wonderful distraction, however brief it was. “i wanted to show you something. it’ll only take a minute.”

true to his word, it wasn’t long before he led you to the back of the small gardens. much to your surprise, they were kept very well.. almost too well, considering the state of the weather. yet near the back corner lay a large bush of vibrant red roses, the scarlet petals appearing to be made from the finest silk, itself. 

“how..how are they-” you stumbled over your words, enchanted by the deep red flowers. something about the specific shade of red was strangely alluring, pulling you closer and closer to the bushes.

“alive?” he finished, noticing your fixation on the flowers and snickering. “there’s a lot more about this house that you don’t know about. strange magic courses through the entire property, magic that even i can’t wrap my head around at times.”

he stepped forward, extending his hand slowly to pluck a single red rose from the bush. he turned to you with a smile ghosting over his lips, his eyes practically piercing into yours. slowly, you reached your own hand out to take the rose from him, unsure if the whisper of gratitude actually left your lips. 

“it’s beautiful,” you sighed gently, treating the stem with delicacy and care.

“isn’t it?” he chuckled, watching you carefully in admiration.

you rotated the rose between your fingers, wanting to study it from every angle. it truly was magical, especially with the knowledge it had suffered through harsh winters.. there was something so beautiful about its resilience. suddenly, a sharp pain coursed through your finger, brought upon by a prick of a thorn. the rose fell into your other hand as you examined the small wound, the tiniest drop of blood falling down your index finger..

you chuckled, caught off guard by the prick of the large thorn. while you were opting to forget about it, though, jeonghan seemed fixated on it, his eyes glued to your finger. he watched the soft pool of blood trail down your hand while you searched your pockets for a handkerchief. he drew in a deep breath, one that called to you. 

briefly, you were alarmed by the intense daze he fell into. you’d never seen such intensity in his eyes. you wiped your hand off on your skirts, making a mental note to wash it off later, before tapping his shoulder. “jeonghan-” 

he blinked repeatedly once the gentle trail had been washed away, any evidence of the incident wiped clean. though the smell of iron still filled the air between the two of you, tempting him, taunting him.. he cleared his throat, avoiding your gaze for a moment. “my apologies, princess.” 

“it’s not your fault,” you started, offering a gentle smile of reassurance. “i should have been more careful.”

“no-” he paused, distracted by the tiny dried marks of blood on your skirt. although his fixation was slowly melting away, the sight puzzled him, raising too many questions and prompting him once again to battle with his impatience. he lifted his chin to meet your gaze, “no. i should have known-”

you held your hand behind your back; although the wound was small, there was no shame in being cautious. “it’s.. killing you, isn’t it?” 

he held eye contact, his intense gaze softening as your words echoed in his mind. he still couldn’t wrap his head around how his mood had shifted within only a few weeks of knowing you; yes, he yearned and hungered for you.. but he had grown concerned for your wellbeing. your readiness. 

“it is..” he slowly admitted.

you sighed deeply; at least the two of you shared a certain hunger. you moved a hand to his cheek, the other now gripping a little more timidly onto the rose. “then just..” you paused, unsure how to state your plea. “i swear i can handle it.”

he sighed in frustration, taking a step back and letting you withdraw your hand from his face.  “you know i can’t do that. not yet.”

“but why?” 

he paused, turning his back on you. he didn’t want you to witness his expression change as he contemplated his piling dilemmas.. “because..” he started, his tone vague and unsure. “you have to be sure that you’re absolutely ready. and i mean.. absolutely ready, without question.”

“i’ll be fine, i swear- i know that you must be suffering-”

he shook his head quickly, gripping gently onto your upper arm. he spoke lowly, as if to share a secret with you alone, “you know how patient i can be, princess; i can wait for just a little while longer. we have to find the perfect moment.” 

you tilted your head back to get a better look at the moon directly above the two of you, shining like a spotlight and providing the perfect ambience. in your mind, there couldn’t have been a better opportunity; the garden was perfectly secluded, cold, the two of you in your own little world.. meanwhile, as jeonghan was allowed a better view of your neck, the intense hunger pooled in his stomach again, his mind going fuzzy.. 

you, of course, did nothing to help him out of his daze as you spoke, “this seems like as good an opportunity as any.”

“no, no-” he started, shaking his head before his gaze fell to the grass. maybe he was being selfish, but he was aiming for a perfectly satisfying moment to taste you, to take you into his world. a time when it would torture wonwoo the most.. “trust me. the wait will be worth it, i promise you.”

you let out a heavy sigh of defeat, knowing there was no use trying to convince him. maybe there was a small truth to what jeonghan said, maybe there was something special about waiting.. ultimately, you complied with his request and agreed to wait. although, you hoped the right opportunity would present itself sooner rather than later. 

–

when you arrived home, however, you wished you’d spent at least a few more minutes trying to convince him. 

“i was wondering where you’d been running off to.”

you recognized wonwoo’s voice from across the room immediately. he leaned back against your bedroom door with his arms folded across his chest and much to your surprise, there was no anger in his expression. more like.. intrigue. a knowing smirk twisted at his lips, hitting you like a slap in the face.

“so you have kept in contact with that.. new friend of ours.”

you hopelessly feigned innocence, your eyebrows knitting together in such a vain attempt. “i don’t know what you’re talking about.” 

he scoffed, the sound of mockery sending a pang through your heart. “don’t lie. tell me, where else would someone go during the night time?” 

you felt your throat run dry as he spoke, knowing that he had effectively backed you into a corner. knowing that your act of innocence had come to a close, you let your shoulders slump as you asked him, “why do you care, anyways? it’s not like you were planning on putting any effort in this marriage outside of the trading agreements.”

he shrugged his shoulders, pushing off of the wall to take a step closer. “maybe you’re right. but i simply won’t allow that horrid monster anywhere near what’s mine. not anymore.”

“but don’t you see? he couldn’t care less about your castle. he has a home of his own, he lives comfortably. he doesn’t need to steal anything from you. you.. you judge him too harshly.”

“then why would he try to worm his way into gaining partial ownership of the castle?”

“you tell me,” you countered after a bitter scoff left your lips. “for god’s sake, just tell me what really happened between the two of you! why are you so convinced he’s hyperfixated on ruining your life?” 

his shoulders stiffened, his eyes quickly leaving yours. for a moment, he seemed to be vaguely tempted to tell you the truth, with you standing before him, on the edge of your seat.. “from this moment on, you are not to see him any longer.”

you felt your face grow hot with rage as he quickly turned his back on you. you yelled, “you don’t get to decide that for me!” 

“i’m doing this for your own good,” he bit back, whipping around to face you with a harsh stare. “i thought your studies would have brought you some much needed clarity but apparently not. you either can’t see jeonghan for what he truly is or you simply refuse to. he’s a demon. he’ll feed on you and drain you for all you’re worth as soon as he gets the opportunity.”

“you don’t know that! you don’t know anything about him, he’s gentle and.. beautiful and kind.. whatever version of him you thought you knew, it’s not him!” 

“that’s exactly my point!” he snapped. “how can you not see that he’s putting on a facade for you?”

you hated how blunt and cold his words sounded, how they drove into your heart like a stake. most of all, you hated how even for a brief second, you wondered if there was any truth to his statement. was the vampire truly so magnetic and alluring to a fault? did he truly have a certain power over you that you couldn’t begin to comprehend?

“you’re wrong about him,” you finally muttered, your voice silent yet filled with anger. if only the sunlight wasn’t peeking through your curtains; you would have relied on the vampire of the hour to conveniently whisk you away.

wonwoo huffed, opening the door for two more guards to step inside your quarters. “they’re to watch over your balcony every evening,” he explained, only fueling the raging fire of anger inside you. “it’s not up for debate; it’s unsafe for you at night, otherwise.”

you were quick to follow him as he stepped into the hallway, hurriedly making his way to the spiral staircase. it was as if his words meant nothing, as if they had no consequence.. “so i’m a prisoner? my privacy is to be thrown out the window?”

“it’s for your protection,” he bit back, the monotony in his tone doing little to reassure you. “i won’t argue with you on this matter for a second longer. not when there’s endless amounts of work to be done.”

you stopped in place, your hand clutching tightly onto the railing.. how did you keep managing to forget about your own wedding? 

–

as the days passed, you considered again and again what may have become of you if you’d begged and pleaded with jeonghan to let you stay with him. at least for a little while longer. after hours and hours of meticulous wedding planning and rehearsals, you were heartbroken to find that the vampire made no attempt to approach your balcony. the two guards, unassuming as they may have been to a being like himself, were still a nuisance he wasn’t willing to deal with.

it was the evening before your wedding. even when you were surrounded by family members, servants, and several members of the court alike, you had never felt so isolated. final preparations were being made but you couldn’t bring yourself to focus on anything except for the dancing flames in the wall’s tiny opening before you. 

although jeonghan had remained absent for a few days, you could still feel his presence somehow. a brief gust of cold wind, for example, resembling a whisper in your ear.. it prompted you to wonder if beyond the stacking differences between the two of you as individuals, he had found a way to communicate with you.

soon wonwoo stood before the rest of the crowd, gathering their attention. as he spoke, it was the happiest he had ever sounded for as long as you knew him, which, truthfully was not saying much. “today marks a momentous occasion- the eve before two kingdoms with many differences on paper, put them aside and unite as one.”

modest applause rang through the hall and brought a discomforting tingling to your ears. they seemed to be celebrating your hopelessness and wonwoo seemed to catch on, for his eyes immediately landed on you before he spoke again. “my dear princess-” the words unfamiliar and unwelcome, “let us celebrate the beginning of a new chapter together.”

together.

one thing was for certain; you two were to stay at arm’s length as you navigated the new chapter he spoke of. neither of you had any intention to embrace a possible connection.

the two of you would, however, do whatever necessary to keep up appearances. hence why you slowly approached him with the fakest, loveliest smile you could plaster upon your lips.. and as you faced the crowd with him, hand in hand, either of your parents’ proud smiles forcing your stomach to twist in knots, it all felt too alarmingly real.

it was clear your audience was expecting something, maybe a little kiss.. which neither of you would give them the pleasure of witnessing. both of you were determined to save that agony for the wedding..

as suspense seemed to fill the room, however, thunder began to rumble on an otherwise clear night sky and rattle the windows. while no one else in the room seemed to think much of it, you were puzzled- could it be-

“now don’t stop on my account.”  

a collective gasp filled the room as jeonghan stood merely a few feet away from the reluctant couple with a shit eating grin. his gray suit made his fluffy blonde hair that you had missed so dearly pop, not to mention his deep red eyes. you had to laugh; it truly felt like centuries since you had been forced to commit the vampire’s beautiful features to memory.

“jeonghan,” wonwoo sighed through gritted teeth. “i’m getting a strange sense of deja vu.”

“as am i,” he chuckled, taking a single step closer to you. he barely had time to blink in your direction before wonwoo unsheathed his sword, the sharp tip nearly inches away from the vampire’s jaw. his smirk merely deepened as his eyes flicked to the blade. “c’mon. you know that won’t do a thing.”

“true,” wonwoo nodded. “but it could distract you.”

you furrowed your eyebrows in questioning merely seconds before jeonghan quickly reached behind and plucked the pointed wooden stake from the guard’s hand. he laughed and you hated how beautiful the sound was leaving his pouty, addicting lips.. “i don’t get distracted, old friend. not anymore.”

wonwoo huffed, making no further attempt to mask his anger. “get out of my castle at once.”

“with pleasure.” his voice was sharp and cool as he reached towards you, dodging the sword and grabbing your forearm. his grip was firm but gentle, his cold fingers locked around your arm as he brought you into his cold embrace. the last thing you saw before he draped his dark cloak over your figure was wonwoo waving the sword in jeonghan’s direction to no avail. for in the blink of an eye, you were in the center of the vampire’s drawing room. 

you were breathless. your chest heaved against his as you gripped tightly onto his shoulders, not wanting to part from him for even a moment. “thank you..” you whispered. “how did you..”

“i had a feeling,” he replied, his hands slowly inching closer to your lower back. 

“why didn’t you come back?” you asked him with desperation, your grip on his shoulders subconsciously growing tighter.

he stayed silent for a moment, his expression turning somber. “there were a few complications. and i.. well, truthfully i needed some time to myself. please forgive me, princess, i should have told you-”

“no,” you interrupted, moving your hands to cup his cheek and prompt him to look in your eyes again. “what matters is that we’re together now.” it took everything within you to hold back from adding a tiny ‘forever’ to the end of your sentence. you could only hope that the look in your eyes spoke for itself.

he let out a gentle sigh, which was laced with nothing but affection, before bringing you closer to his large window. now that he was allowed a proper view of you in the moonlight, a peaceful resolve within his features. his hands remained glued to your waist as he brought you impossibly close to him, barely allowing either of you room to breathe. though, it was the way you preferred it.

“i’m sorry princess,” he spoke again, guilt filling his crimson irises to the brim. “i failed you.”

you shook your head immediately, seeing no need for another apology. “no. not yet. you came just in the nick of time.”

he leaned down, letting his forehead rest against yours. thanks to the close, breathless proximity, he could perfectly hear your heart racing in your chest. the sound, as always, was like music to his ears, prompting a familiar ache in the emptiness in his chest- “as did you.”

you pondered the gravity of his words as a warmth spread throughout your body. it washed away all of the dread, hopelessness you had felt not even an hour earlier. and for that- you were eternally grateful to him. you pulled away just enough to meet his gaze again, your voice filled with sentimentality that finally made him smile, “we both found each other at the perfect time.”

he had no words. he hoped his actions would speak louder as he brought a cold hand up to the back of your neck, pulling you in for a deep and slow kiss. he poured everything into it: love, adoration, and most notably, hunger. that familiar sharp, chilling wave of surprise washed throughout your body the moment his fangs grazed your bottom lip. 

your lips were only a single breath away from his when you paused, whispering to him emotionally, “i’m ready.”

he paused, pulling his head back just enough to meet your gaze. but you could tell his patience was wearing extremely thin, judging by the way his fingers had tangled themselves into your hair. “are you absolutely sure?” 

he barely asked the question before you nodded your head, your fingers wrapped around the lapel of his jacket. “positive. please-”

he flashed a smile of relief, the moonlight giving rise to a glint of his pure white fangs merely a millisecond before he leaned in. hoping to help you relax, he left a trail of hungry yet soothing kisses from your jawline to the area where your neck and shoulder met, right above your jugular. 

this was it. this was the moment. all the horrible, tortuous waiting on his end was drawing to a close. he felt you stiffen in his arms as you drew in a deep breath and released it, unable to completely eradicate your subtle fears. your sigh was like a mystical breeze, filling his ears like the sweetest music.. 

he parted his lips, barely letting the sharp edge of his fangs graze the surface of your skin. you quickly responded by gasping and gripping on tighter to his biceps, whispering to him and pleading, “don’t let me go.”

upon hearing your words, he stopped, guilt coursing through his cold body upon impact. you couldn’t fool him; as much as you tried to hide it, you were scared. understandably so. and he couldn’t bare to see it. especially when you had no idea what lay in store..

he stumbled out of your grip, taking two clumsy steps backward. “i.. i can’t-”

you opened your eyes to see him with his chest heaving, his fangs disappearing from view. then you gently pressed, “why?”

“i can’t do this-” he repeated, his voice worn and shaky as he avoided your gaze. “i can’t do this to you.”

“no-” you gasped, raising your voice without fully realizing. “no, jeonghan, i want this. i want you. for eternity, just like you promised-”

“no, you don’t-” he reiterated firmly, turning his back on you. you watched as he practically shrunk under your gaze, picturing the sunken look in his beautiful eyes.. a horrible air of confusion and uncertainty filled the tense air before he finally spoke, “you know.. i wasn’t always like this.”

you furrowed your eyebrows, confused. “what do you mean?” 

he chuckled, but it wasn’t his usual light, airy laugh. no it was filled with an unmistakable sadness that nearly snapped your heart in two. 

“i worked in the palace once. a few years ago. i grew up with the prince, we were good friends- hence why i was able to join the ranks of his knights so quickly. the army, being sworn to secrecy, were tasked with hunting and killing vampires. wonwoo, of course, led all of us fearlessly, determined to put an end to the generational battle.

“but i made the mistake of trusting in him too much. i misjudged him.. so i told him the truth. that i had befriended one. that he was reclusive, that he meant no harm- that perhaps, these were deeply misunderstood creatures. obviously, he didn’t take too kindly to my confession and when i refused to tell him who and where this vampire was, he took an unexpected approach. he promoted me to the general leader of his army.”

he noticed your confused expression but continued to stare out the window, eyes falling to the gardens below. “the next excursion the army took was to a notoriously violent family of vampires’ home. he and i took the lead.. but we were dangerously outnumbered and underprepared. but you see.. he had made sure of that.”

you froze, asking him quietly, “what do you mean by that?”

he drew in a deep breath before releasing it, his cold breath casting a cloud upon the window in front of him. “after commanding the rest of his men to escape, he left me inside. for dead. but i suffered a much, much worse fate than death.” 

suddenly he pulled back the sleeve of his silky shirt and you gasped, finally being allowed a glimpse of a tiny scar from none other than “fangs..”

he nodded, dropping his arm to his side. “joshua rescued me and brought me back here, to his home. the only thing worse than the nightmare of being bitten was waking up from it. waking up without a heart, without a running pulse, with a terrible, terrible hunger-” he paused, his eyes finally finding yours. “and to think.. i thought about subjecting you, darling princess, to the same horror.”

it was too much to handle, all at once. you actually stumbled backwards, your hand barely clutching onto the curtain to stop you from falling.. 

“it.. it can’t be true-”

“but it is.”

you felt your heart shatter in your chest and brought a hand to soothe the aching area. “so you were going to use me.. for revenge?” 

once again, he was unable to look in your eyes. he bit on his lower lip, hard enough to draw blood, before shamefully nodding his head. “i was.” 

“was any of it true?” you asked, raising your voice again. you couldn’t help it, you were hurt, angry- angry with both of them, somehow. 

he stepped closer immediately upon hearing the tiny warble in your voice. his hand fell to yours and he pressed a kiss to your knuckles before explaining, “listen to me.. falling for you was never part of the plan. i wanted to take his life from him, everything he knew and loved, just as he’d done to me. but… i never stopped to think about what could become of you. the one who cast their own little spell on me, princess.”

tears fell from your eyes like a dam breaking and you bowed your head down, allowing a small cry to leave your lips. all your hopes, all your ambitions were suddenly dashed with the confession. you brought your hand to your lips in a vain attempt to muffle the heart wrenching cries that left your lips. 

for a moment, you struggled to speak, struggled to voice to jeonghan how.. confused you were. how hurt you were on his behalf. how even then, you couldn’t bring yourself to stop caring so deeply for him. that beyond your initial hurt and anger, you believed him. 

“you don’t have to say anything,” he whispered, his fingers brushing along your jawline. “i know.”

although there was a small comfort to those two simple words, it couldn’t silence your cries. not completely. you looked up to him, and much to his (and truthfully, your own) surprise, you sobbed, “i want to stay with you.”

“no you don’t,” he shook his head, letting his hand fall into your hair. 

“i do,” you sobbed, anger and desperation in your tone. 

“no. you-”

“i do!” you cried out, the edge in your voice breaking his own spirit. “i don’t want to go back now, i.. jeonghan, i can’t go back now-”

he sighed gently, sorrow filling his eyes once more. “princess, pl-”

“i can’t! i can’t, i won’t!” you buried your face in his chest, despite how angry you felt with him in that moment. “you can’t make me!” “listen,” he spoke gently, yet with confidence that brought you to briefly silence your tears. he cradled your head in his hands, fingers weaving through your hair. “even after the pain begins to dull.. you will be hunted. you will never stop living in fear. he will never stop searching for his princess.”

you knew he was right. but you refused to acknowledge it. you cried desperately into his jacket, where he continued to hold you tightly.

“you’ll lose everything. everything you know and love,” he started, his voice finally beginning to shake. “you’ll even lose the sunlight.”

you would have cried out your protest again, had he not seemingly captured your words from you. instead, you felt dumbfounded, speechless.. and for the first time in forever, you felt like giving up. 

“i can’t do that to you. i won’t do that to you.” he captured your chin between his thumb and index finger, prompting you to look into his eyes again. you couldn’t resist, even if the devastation in his eyes was as clear as day. “please.. don’t ask me anymore.”

it pained you to speak, your voice lowering, “does that mean..” you sighed, gently closing your eyes to avoid the look of despair in his eyes. “is it over now?” 

he paused, hating to answer you straight away and potentially add salt to the wound. he seemed to carefully, mindfully craft his words before he spoke, “not completely, princess. i’ll be with you. you could hear me during our time apart, couldn’t you?”

his words brought you a sliver of hope, even if you weren’t fully satisfied. even if you were still preferring to abandon your life in favor of sharing blissful eternal moonlight with him.. “yes. i could.”

“then don’t stop listening for me,” he pleaded before pressing one last feathery kiss against your forehead. “alright? swear it.”

“i swear it,” you murmured, your voice threatening to give way once again. his lips found yours before he could hear the promise in its entirety and he kissed you passionately. the two of you poured your most heartbreaking (but not your last) goodbye into the kiss rather than using anymore hurtful words.

–

it was as if wonwoo was expecting you to come back home. as if he expected you to immediately regret your decision and come back to him.. and you would let him think that way, for now. there was no use in arguing with him and adding to the tense environment. at least he seemed to share the same sentiment, for he didn’t ask any questions or gloat- for jeonghan, in his eyes, had found defeat and that was more than enough for him. 

the morning of the wedding, you felt nauseous, as expected. you were less concerned about parading yourself in a ceremony with a man you couldn’t care less about and more concerned about what it meant for your future. a life filled with safety, security.. and as jeonghan put it, boredom. 

but it was better this way. as you sat at your vanity table, you felt as if you were reliving the memory of that first night in real time. your eyes flicked to the rose he had given you, laying across the table. it was still in full bloom, vibrant waves of red petals still as full of life as when you had first laid eyes on it. suddenly a cool breeze filled your room, even with the windows closed.. maybe a little bit of his magic would stay with you for the rest of your life, after all.

[sorrowsofsilence]

the bet 4 • bad omens

pairing: all bad omens members x fem!reader

words: 10.2k • masterlist

warnings: 18+ smut, ANGST (messssy, they be jealous and working through shit in this part ok) polyandrous relationship, orgasm denial, overstimulation, begging, gangbang, threesome, foursome, voyeurism, double penetration- pls wrap it b4 u tap it, male!masturbating, male!receiving, fem!receiving, creampies, "sloppy seconds" (oops), slight choking, swearing, nicknames: princess, pretty girl, good girl), jealousy, arguing, physical fighting (jolly be punched), drinking

summary: It wasn't really just a game after all, was it?

note: thank you for everyone's patience <3 I loved this series, way more than I thought I would when part 1 was a silly little fever dream I had, that now turned into PLOT lol. So thank you all again <3 enjoy!

+ Please read all the warnings before reading +

PS. THIS IS A FANFIC ABOUT REAL PEOPLE IN FICTIONAL SCENARIOS. I AM NOT IMPLYING THIS IS HOW THESE PEOPLE ARE IRL OR THAT THIS SITUATION WOULD HAPPEN. IT IS FOR FANFIC PURPOSES ONLY!

+ recap from part 3 +

"You want control over her-" Ruffilo gestured around, "over us."

"That's bullshit," Noah scoffed, eyes narrowing. "Don't twist this."

You pulled away from Jolly, your heart lerching forward anxiously, "Can you not think with your dicks for a second? That not what Noah is saying?"

"I- thank you!" He threw a hand out at you in agreement as he sucked in another breath, "I'm talking about boundaries. There are five of us here, all with the same level of responsibilities. And you guys decided to fuck before a show, and ignore everything else. For..."

He faltered, eyes locking with yours, "...for some pussy."

The silence that followed burned, his words feeling like a slap to your chest.

"Thats not- I didn't mean-" Noah stumbled, shame immediately flashing in his face.

You looked away, heart squeezing tight in shame.

"I'm sorry," you whispered. "I shouldn't have started anything before the show. That was...unprofessional."

A low, distorted voice echoed over the sound system: "Bad omens on stage in two. Meet backstage."

Nobody moved.

"We gotta go," Folio said, breaking the heavy silence.

Noah ran a hand down his face and nodded stiffly, his usually easy-going demeanour replaced with a hollow shell.

He turned to leave. "We'll talk about this later. Good luck tonight."

You felt a pang of regret that pinched your heart, a string of shame following as each member left the room.

Only Folio paused at the door, giving you an unreadable look that caused you to share a tight smile.

+++++

As soon as the show ended and you began packing up the soundboard, you shot Matt a look. He stiffened beside you.

“Is that all I am to you guys?” you whispered, shame burning behind your eyes. “Some pussy?”

Matt’s blond head snapped up, horror in his wide eyes, as if you’d struck him. “No—fuck no. That’s not what we meant—”

You cut him off, your voice trembling while you wound the cables more messily with each turn. “Then why did Noah say it? And why didn’t any of you say anything?”

He said nothing, jaw clenched, guilt spreading across his face. You kept your tone low- too many people still buzzing around the venue- but inside, you burned.

“I know I have no right to be upset…not when I was just a fucking bet from the start.”

Matt reached out, his hands settling on your shoulders in a pained kind of warmth, “No- God- we’re all fucked up about this. How is any of this normal?”

You stared at him for a moment, like maybe you could find the answer on his face. Yet, there was nothing.

Before you could speak again, someone called from behind you.

Noah appeared, his voice quiet but tinged with anger, "Can we talk?"

You instinctively narrowed your eyes at his tone, feeling both defensive yet understanding. Ahreeing, he guided you back to the green room and shut the door behind you. He turned swiftly once it was closed, towering over you with his arms crossed.

“What do you want?” You mumbled, despite knowing exactly what he was going to talk about.

“Look, yeah, I said it- ‘some pussy.’ Maybe I’m an asshole. But what was I supposed to do when I’m falling for you, and I watch you fall for everyone but me?”

You shook your head, glare sharp. “You know I want you, I need you- but you call me that?”

Noah scoffed bitterly, “Yeah? You didn’t look like you needed me earlier. I didn’t hear you calling my name. Just moaning for them.”

Your body went rigid as you read between his lines. “So that’s what this is about? You’re jealous?”

Noah’s voice turned sharp, acid-laced and raw. “No. I’m pissed I care. One night I’ve got your cum dripping on my fingers, and the next I’m just some guy ignored while you’re busy being devoured by three others.”

Silence pressed in as you replayed his words. Then he stepped forward, pressing you against the door, his face inches from yours. “Tell me, princess…are you upset I called you ‘some pussy,’ or that I wasn’t the one inside you when I said it?”

A breath hitched in your throat at his comment. The intensity in his eyes threatened to swallow you.

“Was it fun for you, letting Nick fuck you while I begged at the other side of the door?” he demanded, running a hand through his messy hair.

You met his gaze without flinching. “I didn’t ignore you because I didn’t care or because I didn’t want you. I just…got caught up. Maybe I liked it. Liked knowing you were listening. Liked how desperate you sounded.”

Noah laughed, a hollow, sad sound, then stepped back. “Maybe we never should’ve pretended this was more than a stupid bet to get into your pants.” His eyes hardened. “Which, by the way, Jolly would’ve won; he’s been inside you more than any of us.”

Tears pricked your eyes, your chest tightening with anger. “I’m not your toy, even if we all agreed to share.”

Silence swelled until Noah’s voice broke it, hoarse; “I never wanted to share you. I just agreed because I thought that was the only way I’d have you at all.”

You let out a sound between a laugh and a sob, “So now you’re punishing me for it?”

Anger crept into your chest as you took a step forward, tears streaming. “I’m sorry I didn’t stop Ruffilo from fucking me and answer the door when you needed help. That was wrong. But everything else? I’m not sorry. I’m not sorry you all chased me or that I caught feelings for all of you. It’s not even about the door, Noah. You’re blaming me for your jealousy, when you agreed to the rules.”

Noah watched as your body shook before him with fury and hurt- his stomach beginning to ache.

“You can’t take your anger out on me just because it was Ruffilo’s cum inside me instead of yours,” you spat.

His face heated as butterflies swirled anxiously in his stomach; but before he could respond, the door swung open.

Matt stood there, breathless and flushed, eyes darting between your tear-stained face and Noah’s rigid frame.

“You okay?” he asked you, too casual for the storm in the room.

Noah stiffened instantly, stepping aside as if trying to hide what you’d just shared. Turning your back to both of them, you wiped your cheeks quickly before tears could fall again.

“Did you follow us?” Noah snapped.

Matt’s eyes narrowed. “I noticed she hadn’t come back. Sorry for giving a shit.”

“Everything’s fine. I had it under control,” Noah answered.

“Oh yeah?” Matt scoffed, stepping further inside, voice rising. “Because making her cry in a locked room is totally ‘under control’?”

“Stop,” you said sharply, spinning to face them. “Stop turning this into a contest over who’s the better guy. You’re both losing me right now.”

Noah flinched as Matt’s mouth opened, then snapped shut. You drew in a ragged breath. “You all said you wanted me. So stop competing. Stop keeping score and see me as a person.”

It was quiet for a moment, before you spoke again, “Because I’m not sure I can keep doing this when there are five of you to love, and only one of me.”

Noah looked like he had something to say- but this time, he didn’t. Neither did Matt.

You stepped past them both, swallowing your tears like poison, and opened the door, “If this is still a game still, I’m done playing.”

You didn’t slam it.You just walked out.

You wandered until your legs ached, circling the streets, finally heading back to the bus. Their voices still echoed- especially his.

“Are you mad I wasn’t the one inside you?”

Noah didn’t know what he was saying.

Or maybe he did. Maybe they all did.

You had wanted to believe they saw you.

But maybe you really were never more than a body with a name.

++++ Inside the green room, the silence shattered like glass.

“You happy now?” Matt snapped, spinning on Noah.

“Don’t start with me,” Noah barked, brows furrowing in frustration. “You were there. You didn’t say anything.”

“And that’s a good thing because I didn’t fucking say what you said.”

Noah ran another hand through his hair, “Yeah? Well maybe I said what we were all thinking.”

“No, you didn’t.” Matt spat, “You tore her apart.”

The door opened again, Ruffilo, Jolly and Folio storming in.

“Why did our girl just leave the building crying?” Jolly snarled, immediately pushing against Noah’s chest in an accusative manor, “You good now, Noah? Get what you wanted?”

Noah’s jaw clenched, fists tight against his side, “Back the fuck off.”

“Oh, so you want me to back off? Not like when you were banging on the damn door like a dog in heat?” His thick accent rolled off his tongue as his silver eyes glared daggers at the singer.

“You still think I was just trying to fuck? I was asking for help. You assholes were all busy shoving your cocks in her every hole while I was backstage trying to fix the earpiece so we’d actually put on a decent show.” Noah’s finger pushed slightly against Jolly’s chest, his ears heating with anger.

Ruffilo’s voice was flat as he crossed his arms, “Oh, come on. Don’t pretend this is about the show. You were pissed you weren’t in the middle of it. Own it.”

Noah’s head snapped toward him. “That’s all you think it was? I would eat her out on the goddamn amp if you could’ve. But I was doing real work while you slacked off.”

Jolly laughed, cruel and low. “Sure, because you’d be so concerned about time if you were the one burying yourself in her pussy.”

Noah shoved him hard, and Jolly staggered back. His voice dropped to a measured hiss. “Say that again.”

“Maybe if you weren’t so busy feeling sorry for yourself-” Ruffilo began as Matt tried to step between Noah and Jolly, but it was too late.

Noah’s fist landed right in Jolly’s jaw.

A collective gasp filled the room. Jolly stumbled, then seized Noah’s shirt and yanked him down. They tumbled to the floor in a clash of limbs and harsh words, both ignoring the yells for them to stop.

"Cut it out!" Matt roared, diving onto the pair in an attempt to pry them apart. He clutched Jolly’s shirt, wrestling him off Noah, while Ruffilo joined in; enough to keep Noah from striking again.

Folio leaned against the wall, arms folded, eyes burning with frustration. “Grow the hell up,” he muttered.

Noah leveled a heated glare at Folio, struggling in Matt’s grip. “Oh now you've got something to say?” Noah spat bitterly.

“You damn right I do,” the drummer retorted, stepping forward. “You two suggested the gangbang, and you,” Folio pointed sharply at Jolly- “you started this entire bet by saying she’d suck your cock again; treating her like a prize none of us really respected.”

Jolly’s lip was bleeding now, crimson catching in the scruff of his beard as he sneered past Matt’s shoulder. “Yeah, and you stayed silent didn’t you?” he snapped at Folio. “Don’t act like some moral fucking compass now.”

Folio advanced, voice low. “I never saw her as a game. I didn’t turn her into a contest. I’ve wanted her from the start.”

“Oh, please,” Ruffilo scoffed, pacing. “You’re the ‘gentleman’ vulture, lurking until it’s convenient.”

“Better than the assholes who keep count,” Folio shot back.

“Enough,” Matt’s voice cracked through the room like thunder, raw and full of gravel. He shoved away from them both, chest heaving, eyes burning. “This isn’t about who touched her last or who made her scream louder. It’s that she walked out crying- because we treated her like a fucking trophy.Because our egos were bigger than her feelings. She never asked to be gambled for. ”

Silence swallowed the room. Noah’s shoulders shook; his breath came in shallow gasps. “I can’t believe I called her that name.”

Guilt hung heavy. Finally Folio whispered, “I can’t believe none of us defended her.”

“I wanted to apologize,” Noah continued, eyes fixed on the floor. “I wanted to bring her back here and kiss her and make things right. Instead I lashed out and blamed her for shit I can’t even understand.”

Ruffilo scrubbed a hand down his face, “She probably just feels like an object,” he muttered, the words tasting bitter.

Folio exhaled slowly, as though releasing a weight. “I love her.”

The words struck them all as though he spoke for each one. “I really do. I want dumb movie dates, flowers she pretends to hate, forehead kisses when she’s upset. I want her to meet my mom. I want to spoil her until she tells me to stop. I want to give her my life, not just an orgasm.” His voice cracked.

Ruffilo looked up, eyes bright. “I…I love her too.”

Their eyes met, but not as rivals. Maybe they finally realized it wasn’t supposed to be a competition… because you never gave them a reason to believe one was less important than the other.

Matt ran a hand through his hair. “Yeah, we’re jealous. But mostly we’re terrified of losing her, scared she’d choose one of us- or none. Christ, I wouldn’t blame her.” He leaned back against the wall. “We made her choose all of us.”

Jolly slid down beside Noah, hand trembling on his knee. “We can’t fix this with flowers and a half-assed sorry. She deserves more.”

“We want her. She wants us all,” he continued softly, “Isn’t that something to be grateful for; that she’d stretch herself thin for us, even after knowing about the bet?”

No one argued.

Ruffilo toyed with his sleeve. “If having a piece of her heart means fighting jealousy, I’ll learn. Because I can’t let her go- and I wouldn’t survive seeing her with someone else.”

Noah’s lips thinned in thought. It was going to be fucking hard, but he realized that he had to try. For you. And so would Folio, Ruffilo, Jolly, and Matt. It was an agreement to work through their possessive feelings and doubt- to give you the treatment you deserved.

Folio nodded slowly, his face softening. “We’ve just gotta stop making it about us. If we’re really in love with her, then we give her everything. Not just sex.”

Matt’s voice dropped to a gentle murmur. “Ok. Together, we say we’re sorry. And then we shut up and let her tell us what she wants. No guilt and no pressure. Just… honesty.”

“And if she tells us to fuck off,” Jolly added, “we walk.”

Noah nodded. “But if she lets us in- even just a little- we love her like she’s the only woman who’s ever mattered.”

“Because she is.” Ruffilo said.

The silence between them was no longer cold. It felt like an agreement, tentative but real.

And although it was still fractured and aching- they finally aligned.

++

The boys still did decide to buy flowers, when on their way back to the bus.

However, Not just any flowers- the ones you loved. Roses, lilies, tulips and a few others they didn't even recognize. They found them at an all-night grocery store, and from the cashier's perplexed look, she assumed they were either late for an anniversary party or very, very drunk. But not a single man spoke, each lost to their thoughts as they placed the abundance of flowers in the cart.

This was not about buying forgiveness; it was an offering, a promise to do better.

As soon as they stepped onto the bus, they spotted you huddled at the far end of the couch, arms wrapped around your knees. Your thumb paused on your phone’s screen, and you swallowed hard, turning away from them.

Folio was the first to move.

He stepped forward, holding the awkward bundle of flowers against his chest like a shield. “We know you probably don’t want to see us right now,” he said quietly. “And that’s fair. But we needed to say this.” You stayed silent, eyes down, though you didn’t leave.

He took a breath. “We fucked up. Not just tonight, but from the start. We treated you like a fantasy instead of a person. I know an apology isn’t enough, but I’m giving it anyway. I’m so sorry, Y/N.”

Matt came next, gaze heavy on your curled form. “We got jealous and turned something that could’ve been beautiful into a fucking mess. We forgot you weren’t a prize to fight over. You’re you, and that should’ve been enough.”

Ruffilo whispered, “I’m sorry, love.”

Your breathing caught but your lips stayed shut.

Jolly then knelt before the couch, bringing himself to eye level. “None of this would’ve happened if I hadn’t made it a competition for your attention. You deserve more than being treated like an object. I’m sorry.”

Noah approached last, almost cautiously, as if afraid you’d run. His voice cracked: “We talked. Really talked. And…we want to work on it. On ourselves with this. But only if you want to.”

Your head lifted, eyes red. “Why should I believe you?”

“Because we’re not asking you to take us back,” Noah said. “Not tonight. Not tomorrow. We just want to show you we can grow, that we can love you the way you deserve; without tearing each other apart. We know we’re jealous, but we want to grow, for you.”

You hugged your legs tighter and tossed your phone onto the couch. “And if I say I can’t do it? There are five of you with different kind’s of love. I know this is all new, but it’s important that you guys figure out what you need from me, without treating me like the problem.”

Silence hung in the room as they processed your words. Then Ruffilo let out a shaky breath, “We never wanted you to feel like a problem. You're right, we handled this like shit. But we want to fix it, not by making you choose between us but by learning to share and respect each other...and you."

Folio was the next to speak up, his calm voice filling the silent room, “What if we split our time with you individually, for a while? So that we can all figure out what we need and understand our feelings better. And when we’re comfortable...we can…try again.”

Jolly met your gaze from afar, looking for any sign of approval or disapproval in your eyes. “We want to be with you but not at the cost of your pain... if this isn’t right for you anymore, please tell us.”

“I’ll think about it,” you murmured, fingers threading through the blanket draped across your lap.

Folio’s tensed shoulders relaxed slightly at your words before he held out the bouquet toward you. “These are for you- from all of us.”

Taking the flowers from him, you skimmed your fingers across petals of roses, lightly inhaling their scent. “Thank you.”

Your heart did flutter at the gesture, despite your feelings. The fact you had all five of your boys, basically begging you to stay with them- that made your stomach swirl.

Matt piped up, “And Y/N? Noah is…” he breathed in deeply, letting it out slowly before continuing, “He was out of line earlier. I know he's sorry, we all are. You're not just some… you're not what he said.”

Noah nodded along with his words before clearing his throat and adding, “I’m so sorry. We never felt that way about you. You're not just a toy to us. You're...you're Y/N." His voice was barely a whisper as he confessed, sincerity laced with remorse in his tone. Your eyes landed on him, silently locking onto his gaze.

Suddenly, it was just you and him in the room. And you believed him, wholeheartedly.

++

Hours passed, the pile of flowers decorating the rickety bus table with their vibrant colors and fresh fragrance.

They all left you alone after the lengthy apology and confessions, understanding your need for solitude…or so you thought until there were soft thumps on the door.

Jolly entered quietly, cautiously, his eyes briefly flickering to the flowers before finding yours.

He slipped next to you on the couch without uttering a single word, offering a consoling silence that held a strange sense of comfort. You melted into his touch when his hands found yours, intertwining your fingers together as you both stared at the empty place before you.

“I mean it,” he whispered after a few minutes of silence, his voice barely above audible but weighty enough to hold your attention. “All those things I said. We need to make it right, for you.”

You turned your head to look at him, swallowing the lump in your throat. His eyes were soft as he watched you, filled with so much raw sincerity that your heart ached. You nodded, barely visible in the dim room but enough for him to sigh in relief.

“Don’t carry the guilt, Y/N,” he murmured, thumb stroking your hand gently. "This isn't your fault or responsibility to fix... it's ours."

A small smile tugged at your lips. “Thank you, Jolly.”

“You don’t need to thank me,” he said quietly, pressing a lingering kiss on the back of your hand.

His calming presence and sincere words brought you comfort while the kiss he placed on your hand lingered, not just on your skin, but as a warmth that spread through your chest.

When he slightly pulled back, he settled beside you, clearly intending to stay until you asked him to leave. His arm rested gently behind your back, not in a possessive manner, but as a quiet offer of support. You leaned your head against his shoulder, and he adjusted, wrapping an arm around you. His other hand remained entwined with yours, thumb tracing slow, steady circles.

Neither of you spoke because words weren't necessary. You felt at ease beside him, savoring his presence. You wouldn't trade this feeling for anything.

Jolly’s lips lightly touched your hair. “I know I shouldn’t ask for anything from you right now,” he murmured, his voice rough. “But I need you to know… I love you. I really, really do.”

Your heart skipped a beat at his confession, lifting your head to face him, meeting his gaze filled with such tenderness it made your chest ache.

“And I need to show you,” he added, his voice even softer. “What that means. What you mean to me.”

The guitarists hand moved to your cheek, thumb caressing your skin as if it were sacred. He leaned in slowly, giving you a chance to stop him, but you didn’t.

“Can I kiss you?”

His lips met yours in a kiss that felt more like a gentle exhale than a collision. As if he was kissing you to say thank you for still being there.

The blanket slipped from your shoulders as he gently guided you back, his body moving with yours, careful and unhurried. There was no urgency- just a need. Not to take, but to give. To honour.

He kissed down your neck, his lips barely brushing your skin.

Every hitch of your breath under his kiss made him more mindful. His hands traced the length of your arms, his own shuddering when he heard you moan. His lips against your skin felt soft and caring; a complete contrast to the hot, fervent kisses shared with him before.

You closed your eyes, fingers tangling in his long dark strands, tugging lightly until a soft groan vibrated against your skin. His lips traced lower, kissing a path down your chest, gentle and slow as if savoring each inch of your skin.

“I…” A shuddered breath interrupted your murmur. His hand came around to steady you, to stroke over the curve of your hip and remind you that he was there, loving you. “I want that too, Jolly,” you breathed out finally, meeting his gaze.

He paused, silver eyes locking with yours for a moment before they jumped to your lips and back up again. “You sure?”

A small smile lifted a corner of your mouth as you nodded. “Yes.”

His kiss was hotter this time, deeper, but still filled with the same reverence as before. You got lost in him as the bus fell silent around you, all the chaotic noise disappearing until there was only him.

Jolly’s kiss grew firmer, but the tenderness never wavered. Every press of his lips said, ‘You don’t owe me this, and yet I’m beyond grateful you’re here.’

His body settled against yours, solid and warm without ever crowding you–a stark contrast to before. He was here simply to cherish you.

He drew back just enough to catch your gaze, eyes bright and breathless. His thumb traced along your lower lip, then drifted to your cheek as if anchoring himself to the moment.

“You make me feel like I can be soft,” he whispered. “Like I don’t have to be anyone but me. And yours.” His voice cracked on that last word. Yours.

“You have no idea what you do to me,” he murmured. “How often I’ve thought about you… as if I matter to you.”

His hands slid down, one curling gently around your thigh while the other rested over your ribs, thumb tracing the steady beat of your heart.

“You’re so beautiful,” he breathed. “You always were, but like this… letting me touch you so freely… I just…”

He kissed you again, a trembling, tender kiss that sparkled with emotion until your eyes stung.

“Let me love you,” he pleaded softly.

You nodded again, words caught in your throat.

He took his time; pausing as if to memorize every second, and then eased himself between your legs. His mouth moved slowly and deliberately, drawing soft moans from you. Each gentle flick of his tongue against your folds made you gasp his name; and with every gasp, his fingers brushed down your thigh, grounding you while your body teetered on the edge.

With each shake of your hips Jolly sighed heavily, relishing in giving you pleasure that focused solely on you- like getting you off was the only reward he craved. He lingered until your legs shook, tasting you through your orgasm as your hands gripped the faux leather couch.

When he finally rose, he looked spent. His hair was tousled, eyes shining, and lips still glistening from your arousal. He leaned down again, pressing a long, deep kiss full of everything he couldn’t say out loud.

++

The final week of tour went by quickly.

Despite the tension that still lingered between you all, it had become a bit less pointed and more bearable as the days passed. The shows were flawless, your heart lightening when you saw them meshing seamlessly on stage every night. There were no arguments or heated spats backstage. But there was also an unusual distance between you all.

You spent most of your time alone, busying yourself with technical stuff until you were far too exhausted to think. Matt would still accompany you silently, his subtle presence at your side oddly comforting even in the heavy silence. Ruffilo was unusually quiet during the last few shows, his eyes always lingering on you when he thought you weren't looking. Noah had kept his distance ever since that talk, though he did attempt a conversation every now and then.

It was Jolly who tried to bridge the gap between you guys, his efforts evident in the little gestures he offered: small notes left for you with words of encouragement, coffee brewed just the way you like it, random compliments; all subtle attempts to soften the tension. On the other hand, Folio was relatively silent, observing from a distance but his gaze always held an unwavering warmth.

All the boys had been giving you space to think things through while dealing with their own feelings individually.

The last day of tour arrived sooner than any of you had anticipated. The show ended with a standing ovation, the crowd cheering for an encore that left everyone breathless and drenched in sweat.

Backstage, amidst the laughter and congratulatory hugs for a successful tour, you found yourself locking eyes with Noah- heavy with resolution and sincerity.

His gaze softened when you offered a small smile, mirroring his own.

As the rest of the band began to pack up their gear, he approached you quietly, uncertainty tugging at his brows. "Hey," he said gently when he was close enough.

"Hey," you replied, your heart fluttering slightly at his presence. He nodded, fidgeting with his shirt as he looked around for a moment before meeting your gaze again.

"I just wanted to say…” His voice was low, almost apprehensive, “That I miss you. And thank you for working so hard on this tour with us. I appreciate you.”

His words washed over you, and the tension you'd been carrying for weeks seemed to uncoil, little by little. You blinked at him, taken aback but genuinely touched. “I… thanks, Noah.”

He scratched the back of his neck with a sheepish grin. “It’s…” He paused, shaking his head slightly. “It’s too quiet without your company.”

Your lips twitched upwards in a soft smile, and you stepped closer, resting your hand lightly on his arm. “You weren’t exactly that big of a chatterbox before.”

His gaze fell to your hand on his arm, and then travelled back up to meet yours.

"I miss us all actually talking," he admitted quietly. "I miss how we used to be around each other in comfortable, casual...fun." The word lingered in the air, intwined with a heavy dose of regret.

“I miss that too,” you confessed, offering him a small yet sincere smile.

His gaze softened at your confession, the remnants of tension disappearing from his form.

Silence fell over the two of you as the reality of the tour ending sunk in, melancholic and bittersweet. But there was also an inkling of hope, painting your hearts with delicate hues.

Another voice then broke the quiet. Folio approached both of you, carrying a water bottle and what appeared to be a small piece of lightly toasted bread spread with jam.

“I noticed you didn't eat earlier,” he explained upon seeing your surprised expression.

Your heart fluttered at his attention to detail, and at the caring gesture. Noah’s gaze darted between you and Folio, though he remained silent.

“Thank you, Nick,” you smiled warmly, taking it from him.

Folio gave you a small smile, his gaze lingering longer than expected. “You’re welcome,” he responded, the tightness in his chest easing your words.

Noah watched as Folio moved away, nodding his approval before turning back to you. “Eat,” he urged, and you couldn’t help but chuckle.

“I will, mom.”

He chuckled at the tease, watching as you took a small bite.

Averting your eyes, you noticed Ruffilo and Matt conversing lightly while packing up the equipment. Ruffilo looked up, meeting your gaze. He sent you a small nod and a smile your way which made your heart flutter. In his own silent way, he was still apologizing- acknowledging what had been done and promising to make it right.

“Come join us for some drinks at the pool?” Jolly asked, interrupting your thoughts. He padded towards you with an inviting smile on his face. The offer was casual yet laden with hope– hope that you might finally be able to break free of this uncomfortable silence that had dominated the past week.

“You sure?” You asked, taking a sip of water. Jolly nodded, patting Noah’s shoulder.

“An evening swim at the Karlsson-Sebastian manor? Wouldn’t be worth it without you.”

After a moment hesitation, you accepted, “Alright.”

A soft smile stretched across Jolly’s face as he clapped a firm hand onto Noah’s back. “Great! Let’s get packed and then ditch this place. We deserve a beer.”

Once everyone made it back to Noah and Jolly’s place, you sighed. Despite years of memories at this house, things felt different now.

After changing and grabbing a towel from the bathroom closet, you found your way to the backyard. The soft fairy lights around the pool illuminated the sprawling space, lending it a tranquil vibe. Noah was already in the pool, his form illuminated by the underwater lights, casting an ethereal glow onto his skin. Matt and Ruffilo were lounging on the pool chairs, beers in their hands and engaged in light conversation. Folio was starting a fire to prepare hot dogs, while Jolly was busy setting up a portable stereo.

As you stepped closer, they fell silent- every pair of eyes on you. It physically pained you to see them all looking so repentant and unsure, as if one wrong move would send you running.

You cleared your throat, feeling more than a little awkward under their gaze. "Hey," was all you managed, offering them a small smile.

Sitting on the edge of the pool, you dipped your legs in, grateful the water was heated.

"Could you pass one of those over?" you asked, pointing to the beers in Matt's hand.

"Course," he replied, reaching for a bottle and tossing it to you with a soft smile. Catching it, you took comfort in the familiar action.

Noah watched you from the corner of the pool, his eyes shyly darting away every now and then.

"Just come here,” You said between sips of the drink, fighting back a laugh.

Noah huffed out a laugh, before nodding and swimming over to join you by the edge. He kept just enough distance to respect your personal space while still making his presence known. This close, you could make out the faint freckles splashed across his shoulders, illuminated by the pool lights.

“I like your swimsuit,” he commented suddenly, eyes flicking briefly over your figure.

Your cheeks heated up with a faint warmth. “You picked it out, remember?”

His lips curled up in a sheepish grin. “Right.”

Ruffilo walked over slowly, taking a seat next to you. Placing his legs in the water next to yours, he swayed them gently, focusing on the small waves that formed.

"Mind if I join you?" His voice was soft, almost inaudible over the soft lullaby of the wind.

You glanced over at him, scanning his bare torso briefly.

"Not at all," you shrugged, a small smile playing on your lips.

He braced himself by placing an arm on the cement behind your back, closing the proximity gently.

You didn’t move away.

“You looked like you needed a buffer,” Ruffilo said quietly, gaze fixed ahead on the shimmering surface of the pool. “Or maybe just… someone who wasn’t afraid to sit close.”

You exhaled, the beer bottle cool between your fingers. “Is it that obvious?”

He tilted his head toward you. “Only to someone who’s been feeling the same thing.”

You leaned back on your palms, glancing at him from the corner of your eye. “And what are you feeling, Nicky?”

His mouth quirked up, more wistful than playful. “Like I miss you.”

You leaned into his side, agreeing, “I miss you. I miss all of you.” Your gaze flickered from him back to Noah wading in front of you.

And then the singer’s voice broke through, like he couldn’t hold it in any longer.

“Can I come closer?”

You blinked, looking down to see him treading water just below your feet. His eyes were wide. Hopeful.

You nodded. “Yeah.”

With a quiet splash, he moved between your legs and rested his arms on your knees, the position causing your stomach to swirl.

“I’m glad we are home,” he murmured. “And that you’re here.”

Jolly appeared near the fire, adjusting the volume of the music, but you felt his eyes flicker toward the three of you-watching, waiting, like he didn’t want to intrude but didn’t want to be left behind either, now that you were finally opening up.

Matt tossed another log onto the fire and leaned back on his chair. “So,” he called casually, breaking the tension with ease, “do we want a hot dog now or after we pretend we’re all fine?”

Everyone snorted—even you—and just like that, the tension cracked a little.

You glanced at Noah. “What do you think? Hot dog first, or bonding in chlorinated water?”

He let out a genuine laugh, leaning his head against your knee now, the contact grounding. “Why not both?”

Ruffilo slid into the water, and reached out a hand toward you.

“Coming in?”

You looked at Noah. Then up at Jolly, who met your gaze with a question in his eyes but a warm smile on his lips.

You placed your beer next to you with a nod, allowing both Noah and Ruffilo lead you into the pool.

The water was warm as it closed around you, taking the edge off the cool night air. Noah’s arm slid around your waist, holding you steady as Ruffilo backed off a little, creating room for you to join him while keeping a respectful distance.

“Everything feels better in water,” He said while effortlessly floating onto his back. He winked at you, and you burst into laughter.

Your laugh seemed to brighten the entire poolside, and even Folio glanced over from his spot by the fire to give you a wide smile.

It wasn’t long before you sucked in a shaky breath, ready to speak your truth about what you wanted.

“I’m sorry for being so distant the last week- but thank you for giving me space.”

Ruffilo and Noah watched you warmly, nodding.

Noah rubbed his thumb gently over your hip beneath the water. “You don’t need to apologize. We just wanted you to come back when you were ready.”

“And you did,” Ruffilo added, eyes soft but intense. “That’s all that matters to me.”

You looked between them, and your next words swam up before you could swallow them. “I want all of us to work. I want you all to be mine, and I will be all of yours. You’ve already shown me you’re willing to work on the jealousy- and I want to grow with all of you.”

Ruffilo’s expression cracked, something fierce and vulnerable shining through. His hand slid up to cradle the back of your neck, water dripping down his forearm as he leaned in, forehead resting gently against yours.

“I’ve wanted to hear you say that since the night we all fell apart,” he whispered, voice rough with emotion. “Thank you for giving us the chance to prove we can be what you need.”

Noah pressed closer against your back, arms around you like he couldn’t bear to let go now that he finally had permission to hold you like this. “You have no idea how hard it was… watching you from afar this week.”

You let your hands float up, resting one against Ruffilo’s chest and the other curled behind Noah’s head. “Trust me…It wasn’t easy for me either.”

Then Ruffilo kissed you. Not a careful kiss-a kiss full of hunger, weeks of restraint melting into one needy, heated moment. His mouth opened against yours, tongue teasing, while his hand sliding down your back beneath the water, gripping your hip like he didn’t want to let go.

Noah groaned softly behind you. His hands tightened around your waist, as they slid slowly up your ribs, under your top. His lips kissed your shoulder, then your jaw, while Ruffilo kissed your mouth greedier.

You let yourself be held between them, hands skimming along wet skin in the pool, bodies pressed against you from front and back like they needed to memorize you. Every touch felt like a plea- stay, choose us, let this be real.

Ruffilo broke the kiss just long enough to pant, “Can I touch you more? Tell me if you want me to stop.”

You shook your head, eyes heavy with lust. “Please don’t stop.”

Noah’s voice dropped low. “Let us show you how much we missed you.”

The water rippled around you as Ruffilo’s hands slid lower, over the curve of your ass, his forehead pressed to your temple now. Noah’s mouth was on your shoulder again, teeth grazing lightly.

You were shaking—not from fear, but from the feeling of finally, finally being seen.

“I-I know I said I didn’t just want to be seen as a toy,” you murmured against Ruffilo’s lips, voice trembling with need. Then you pulled back just enough to spin toward Noah, crashing your mouth onto his like you couldn’t stand one more second apart.“But I really need you to use me right now.”

Noah kissed you like he was starving, his tongue claiming yours, hand sliding up your thigh underwater to the place you ached most. “I’ve been thinking about this pussy every goddamn night,” he growled against your lips. “Dreaming about how it feels around my fingers… my cock…”

Behind you, Ruffilo’s breath hitched. He pulled you tighter against his chest, his arms wrapped strong around your middle. “You think we didn’t smell how fucking sweet you were when you walked away?” His fingers drifted lower under the water, brushing your ass with a possessive squeeze. “You left us hard, baby. Hurting.”

Noah’s teeth caught your jaw, voice rough and wrecked. “No one touches you like we do. No one knows this body like we do.” His tattooed fingers finally found your core, slick and eager. “You’re so fucking wet for us.”

“For us,” Ruffilo echoed, reverent and raw. “God, you missed us too, didn’t you?”

Your head fell back against his shoulder, the confession pulled from your lips like a prayer. “Yes-fuck, yes. I missed you. All of you.”

Noah’s mouth dragged down your neck, every kiss a brand. “Say it again. Say you missed our cocks. Say you missed being full.”

Your thighs clenched on instinct, but Ruffilo held your hips firm, keeping you open for Noah.

“That’s it,” he coaxed, hot breath at your ear. “Let us in, baby. Let us show you why you don’t have to choose.”

Noah’s finger finally slid between your folds, sinking into your body like it belonged there. “We’re gonna take our time with you tonight. Stretch you open slow. Remind this pretty pussy exactly who gets to fuck it.”

His voice dropped lower. “All five of us.”

You whimpered, body trembling between them, completely theirs.

Ruffilo nuzzled your temple, whispering like a vow, “You belong to us, pretty girl. And we’re so fucking lucky to have you.”

Jolly and Folio now stood by the edge, watching with hungry eyes.

“There’s our girl,” Jolly mumbled, unable to take his eyes off Noah and Ruffilo. The two had pulled your swimsuit off, leaving you naked within their grasp.

You wrapped your legs around Ruffilo’s body, facing him now. The boys switched hands, Ruffilo quickly sinking his fingers into your body to replace where Noah once was.

“You’re fucking perfect,” Noah whispered, chewing on your neck while his hand wrapped around to circle your clit. The water around you rippled as Ruffilo pumped his fingers in and out, and your back arched into Noah in attempt to rut your hips forward, against his strokes.

Your eyes squeezed shut as your orgasm built- but you couldn’t let yourself cum without another one of your boys.

“Matt?” You croaked, voice strained in pleasure. The blonde slid into the pool without hesitation, swimming up to the three of you.

"Yes?”

Your lidded eyes yearned for him, “Kiss me.”

He smiled, radiant, before grabbing your jaw firmly. With his lips latched onto yours, deliciously desperate, you moaned between the three of them.

Ruffilo flashed you a slutty smile as he continued to fuck you with his fingers, a string of curses leaving his lips when he felt you clench around him, “God- I can’t wait till it’s my cock you’re cumming around.”

You laughed lowly, brows furrowing as you attempted to move with Ruffilo’s pace- but Noah and Matt held you firmly.

“You wanna cum?” Matt murmured against your throat, voice thick with dominance.

You could only whimper, nodding helplessly.

“Then tell us,” Noah purred, dragging his hand away from your core, leaving you empty, aching. “Tell us how bad you want our cocks.”

A sharp cry escaped you, hips twitching, desperate from the denial. The slow fade of your orgasm was agonizing-and perfect.

“Please-fuck-I need to cum. Please, please,” you gasped, every word a desperate prayer.

Ruffilo pulled his fingers out, slow and wet, and Matt’s hand came up to wrap around your throat, claiming. “What did Noah ask you, princess?”

Your eyes fluttered open, landing on Folio and Jolly now perched at the edge of the pool, fists working over their cocks through soaked swim shorts; their eyes devouring the show in front of them.

You licked your lips, voice cracking but honest. “I want your fucking cocks so bad. All of you. I need to be filled in every fucking hole. Please.”

Noah's teeth grazed your ear, breath hot and cruel. Ruffilo's fingers slid back into you with purpose, while Matt’s grip tightened around your throat just enough to send stars dancing across your vision.

You came instantly; unraveling with a strangled moan, held tightly in their arms as waves of pleasure were earned.

Strong hands gripped your waist, and before you could fully recover, Noah was lifting you effortlessly out of the water, your skin slick and shimmering in the moonlight. You gasped as the cool air hit your heated body, legs instinctively wrapping around his waist.

“You think we’re done with you?” he muttered, voice husky, walking toward the patio door like you weighed nothing. “You begged for all our cocks. That means you’re not cumming alone again.”

The sliding door slammed open, and the rest of them followed, silent except for the wet shuffle of footsteps and low, ragged breathing.

They didn’t take you to the bedroom.

Noah dropped you onto the cold granite countertop of the kitchen island, the contrast sending a jolt through your spine. You barely had time to steady yourself before Ruffilo was between your thighs again, pushing them open with no finesse, no patience.

Matt pulled a barstool up, sitting back and stroking himself slowly, watching you fall apart. “Look at her,” he murmured, voice low. “She’s already ruined.”

“She’s not even close to ruined,” Noah said darkly, dragging his towel over his head and tossing it aside. “But she will be.”

Folio took Ruffilo’s place, pushing your stomach gently so you laid back against the counter, while pressing your legs open he his face between your legs with a groan so guttural you felt hot.

Your moan echoed off the kitchen tile; and Folio licked a long, slow stripe up your slit, savoring it, letting his tongue dip into you before curling up to flick your clit. A rhythm so patient and deliberate it drove you wild.

“F-fuck, Nick—” You gasped, knuckles white on the counter’s edge.

He didn’t stop, and didn’t even lift his eyes. Just ate you like he needed to, like tasting your arousal was oxygen. The drummers fingers dug into your ass to keep you spread wide while he devoured you relentlessly.

Ruffilo groaned behind you. “I swear he could make someone cum just by breathing on them.”

“I think he’s trying,” Noah said, walking past to get a drink from the fridge, like you weren’t moaning and trembling on his countertop. “She’s shaking already.”

Matt came up beside you, sliding your hair off your face and pressing a kiss to your temple. “How’s it feel, princess?”

“Good-fuck-it’s so good….”

Folio added two fingers, curling them expertly into your sweet spot while his mouth sucked your clit. You sobbed, legs almost giving out. Only his grip kept you upright.

“He’s gonna make her cum,” Jolly said, eyes gleaming.

“She deserves to,” Ruffilo added, stepping behind Matt.

Folio sucked harder, curling his fingers and your whole body seized.

You moaned loudly, legs trembling as another orgasm tore through you like lightning. He didn’t stop until you were completely still, a withering mess on the marble.

And only then did he stand; chin glistening, lips wet, eyes dark with lust.

“Now,” he said softly, “we fuck her.” Wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, Jolly pulled you off the counter, carrying you into the living room.

“Couch,” he whispered against your ear. “Let me and Matt take you properly.”

They guided you through the open concept space, the low lighting casting a warm glow over the soft throw blankets and deep cushions. You barely touched the floor, passed between their hands like a treasure they weren’t ready to share with the world. Only each other.

Matt flopped down first, already naked, cock resting heavy against his stomach. “Right here, baby,” he said, patting his lap. “Come sit and let us all see you.”

You climbed onto him slowly, straddling his thighs. He gripped your hips with both hands, firm but loving, guiding your body like it was sacred. The others circled; Ruffilo beside you, Noah dropping to his knees in front again, Jolly behind you.

“You still want us?” Noah asked, his hand running up your calf, your knee, your thigh.

“Every single one of you,” you breathed.

That was all it took.

Jolly moved to the side, kissing up your shoulder while Ruffilo leaned in to clasp your lips on his. Noah stayed in front, letting Matt hold you open while he licked at your clit again, slower this time, just teasing.

You were already so sensitive you whimpered, hips jerking involuntarily.

“Look at you,” Matt cooed, brushing your hair back as Jolly slid a hand up your spine. “Fucked-out and still greedy.”

You nodded eagerly, relishing in the feeling of their worship. This was everything you ever wanted and more- your boys.

Matt nodded at Noah to pull away from your core, helping him spin you around so you sat on Matt’s lap, facing him.

Without hesitation, you sunk onto his cock, the feeling euphoric.

The blonde’s face contorted as he chewed on his lip, drunk on the feeling of you wrapped around him once again.

“It’s been so long,” He groaned, hand grabbing your neck again, “You want a cock inside your other hole?”

Ruffilo didn’t waste time. “Get her ready,” he told Noah, who was already between your legs again, kissing the inside of your thigh like he’d missed it.

Jolly shifted behind you, helping you lean forward, draping your arms around Matt’s shoulders while he kissed you slow, tongue curling over yours, messy and unhurried.

“Relax, baby,” Noah whispered, brushing his thumb over your other hole. “Let me stretch you.”

You nodded against Matt’s lips, heart racing as Noah spat onto his fingers, spreading the wetness, and began working you open gently. One finger, then two, his touch was precise but soft, knowing exactly how to make you squirm.

“She’s taking it so well,” Jolly murmured behind you, palms roaming your waist and thighs.

“Yeah, she is,” Folio said, voice awed. “So fucking good for us.”

Matt groaned beneath you as your body rocked between their touches, the press of Noah’s fingers inside your ass while Matt’s cock pulsed deep in your pussy. You clenched around both, crying out into the crook of his neck.

“Fuck, you’re perfect,” he rasped, rutting up into you while Noah slid another finger in. “You’re gonna take us both, aren’t you?”

“Please,” you gasped, eyes glossy. “I want to feel full.”

Jolly ran his hands down your back, eyes locked on the way Noah’s fingers disappeared into your ass, the way Matt’s cock stretched your soaked cunt.

“You’re so fucking beautiful like this,” he said lowly, voice like gravel against your spine. “Stuffed full. Fucking helpless for us.”

“I want you Jolly,” you whimpered, barely able to form words as Noah twisted his fingers just right, making your whole body jolt.

He grinned at that. “Yeah?” he murmured, brushing his cock against your thigh. “Think you can handle me, sweetheart? You already look like you’re on the edge.”

“I can,” you breathed, eyes glassy. “Please.”

“Of course you can,” he cooed, “You were made for this. For us.”

Noah slowly pulled his fingers free, slick and careful. “She’s ready.”

Jolly kissed the corner of your mouth, then guided you forward, urging you to lean more into Matt’s chest. Matt wrapped his arms around you, holding you steady, murmuring encouragement against your cheek as Jolly pressed the blunt head of his cock against your ass, slick and open from Noah’s fingers.

And when he started pushing in, slow and deliberate, you cried out- a sound caught between pain and absolute pleasure.

“Fuck, baby,” Jolly growled, hands digging into your hips, “God, you feel insane. So tight.”

Matt was already panting, knuckles white on your thighs. “Tightest thing I’ve ever felt,” he groaned. “She’s fucking squeezing us—”

Folio knelt beside you, kissing your neck, brushing hair from your face, whispering, “That’s our girl. Look at you-so fucking full, and still not satisfied, huh?”

You shook your head, “N-no. Please let me taste you.”

He let out a ragged breath, his hand cupping your cheek as he met your eyes- blown wide, pupils dark with want. “You’re fucking unbelievable,” he whispered, voice cracking with need. “Still begging, even like this?”

You nodded, lips parted, breath shallow. “Need you, Nick. Wanna taste you while they fuck me.”

That was all it took.

He stood up just enough to free himself, his cock flushed and leaking, already painfully hard from watching the others take you apart. He guided himself to your lips, groaning when you opened eagerly, tongue out.

“Good girl,” he hissed, hand sliding into your hair as he fed himself into your mouth, slow at first. “So eager.”

You moaned around him, the weight of his cock on your tongue making your eyes roll back. Matt thrust up into you with a growl, while Jolly gave a brutal snap of his hips that made your whole body lurch.

Folio held your head steady, fucking your mouth with shallow rolls of his hips. “That’s it,” he gasped. “Take me like you’re made for it-like that.”

You were lost in it, surrounded by them, used and praised and filled from every angle. Jolly’s pace quickened behind you, his grip bruising, and Matt’s thighs were trembling under you, his face buried in your neck.

“Fuck,” Matt choked, “You’re gonna make me cum, you’re so tight, so wet.”

You moaned in response, mouth full of Folio’s cock, your throat vibrating around him.

Jolly leaned in close, voice guttural. “Gonna fill that pretty ass, baby. Can you take it? Can you come like this?”

Your muffled whimper was all the answer he needed.

Folio pulled out for a moment, letting you gasp for air, then pressed a messy kiss to your lips. “You taste so fucking good like this,” he murmured. “Ruined and needy.”

“Don’t stop,” you whispered. “Please—don’t stop.”

And they didn’t.

Matt filled your pussy with ropes of his release, but he continued to fuck his cum back into you while waiting for Jolly. The swede was seconds later, pulling out to coat your ass in strings of his own while Folio released down your throat, holding you still to swallow all of him.

Matt, Jolly, and Folio slowly eased back, panting and spent, their hands still tracing every inch of your skin as they let Noah and Ruffilo take over.

You moaned into Noah’s lips as he carried you up the stairs, relishing in the taste of your tongue.

“Should we take you in the shower?” He asked and your stomach burned, legs shaky.

You shook your head, breath catching. “Not yet… I need a moment.”

Ruffilo’s fingers trailed lightly down your spine as Noah set you down gently on the bed. They both hovered close, watching you with hungry eyes.

“No rush,” Noah said softly. “Right now, we want you-wanna taste you.”

Your lips curved into a slow, sultry smile. “Then let me return the favor.”

You crawled between them, knees sinking into the soft sheets, fingers tracing the contours of their bodies as they lay back, offering themselves to you.

Your lips found Noah first, pressing kisses along his collarbone, down his chest, teasing over the hard planes of his stomach, tasting every inch you’d been craving.

Ruffilo’s hand tangled in your hair, guiding you toward his own body.

You took your time, savoring the taste of them once your lips wrapped around each of their arousals in turn. The heat rose between your mouth and hands, fingers kneading and stroking.

Noah’s breath hitched as you traced slow, teasing circles with your tongue, his hips shifting slightly to meet your mouth.

Ruffilo groaned low, fingers tightening in your hair when your tongue dragged across Noah’s length onto his own.

“You’re so good to us,” Noah murmured, voice thick with want as he watched Ruffilo fill your mouth.

“And you deserve every bit,” you whispered back between strokes, looking up at their flushed faces.

Sucking them for a couple minutes longer, both boys a whimpering mess, you then motioned for them to take you to the shower.

Noah immediately held you against the cool tile, back pressed firmly against it as he positioned himself between your legs in no time.

His fingers dug into your hips as his thrusts were relentless, his cock filling you up, just as Matt’s had prior. Ruffilo took the detachable shower head, flicking the setting to the jet stream before aiming it against your clit.

"No-oh!" You cried out, thighs squeezing around Noah as you held onto his shoulders, fingers digging into the muscles.

Ruffilo’s free hand traced circles around one of your nipples, thumb tweaking the sensitive bud before leaning in to latch his mouth onto your breast. His skilled tongue swirled around the hardened peak, sucking and nipping while he showered your clit with constant stimulation.

Each thrust Noah made had you gasping for air, your climax already building at an intense pace.

“You can’t cum until it’s around Nicks cock, you hear me?”

You whined, shaking your head, “Please Noah-”

“No.” He said firmly, arms shaking as his body tightened. You held on as much as you could, limbs shaking so fiercely you thought you would break in half.

Noah then stopped, burying himself deeper into you as his own release painted your walls. He held onto you, a chant of curses tumbling from his lips before he dropped his forehead against your shoulder, spent.

Ruffilo instantly took over, passing the shower head to Noah.

His cock slid into you easily, pulling a surprised whimper from your lips as he stretched you all over again.

"Tight- despite four others," He growled, burying himself to the hilt. His rough voice raspier due to steam fogging the bathroom quickly. Ruffilo’s pace was frantic, matching the chaos of the water that splashed rapidly against your desire.

Your body thrashed against the cool tile, and in no time, thanks to Ruffilo and the shower head, orgasmic cries rolled off your lips as both boys pushed you into another powerful climax.

“That’s our good fucking girl,” Noah praised, eyes bright with a slutty smile as he watched you come undone. Ruffilo followed shortly, filling you again.

Neither Ruffilo nor Noah let you slide to the floor as exhaustion took over, holding you against the tiled wall. They gave you a minute to catch your breath before they started to wash away the remnants of the evening. The delicate touch of Ruffilo’s soapy hands along each crevice and curve contrasted with the firm strokes of Noah’s hands as he lathered up your hair.

After drying off, they brought you back to the room where Matt and Jolly were waiting on the bed. It was cozy, inviting- their easy intermingling making your heart flutter as brightly as it had when you all had first started.

Folio snuck up from behind and scooped you into his arms, carrying you to the bed as you laughed gently. He laid you down in between Matt and Jolly, who both moved to accommodate everyone else.

Everyone was quiet as the sound of heavy breathing cascaded around the bedroom, the five of them enveloping you in a comforting cuddle puddle.

As Folio’s warm hand traced the dip of your hip, he began to move closer. "Can I?" he asked, eyes meeting yours for permission, his bare chest pressed softly against your side. You nodded, shivering as he leaned down to capture your lips in a searing kiss; that was kinder than before.

The sound of soft laughter from the others made you break away from the kiss. Noah, who had gone through all the trouble of making his way into bed beside Matt, was extended out on his belly, reaching forward like a child eager for a toy.

"Wanna hold your hand," he mumbled sheepishly while stretching across Matt's body to reach for you. Ruffilo playfully swatted at him but relinquished your hand anyway.

While Noah was content with just threading his fingers between yours, the satisfied hum from his chest making you smile softly, Jolly had other ideas. Wrapping an arm around your waist, he hauled you on top of him. His nimble fingers drew invisible lines against your spine, lulling you into a peaceful daze.

“We love you,” Ruffilo whispered, staring at you with admiration. You slowly locked eyes with each of your lovers, giving them a smile.

“I love you. Every, single, one of you.”

Matt, feeling left out, with an amused glint in his eyes, suggested, "We should get under the covers." Everyone hummed in agreement, and without any further preamble they fitted themselves around you like living, breathing puzzle pieces.

Each had their unique way of holding you, but every touch conveyed the same message; reassurance that they were there for you and only you. The entwined limbs beneath the duvet were a testament to their promise to make things work for your sake. Because you were more than worth it.

Despite the relationship being unconventional and tangled, it didn't diminish its perfection for the six of you. The dynamics were complex, like an intricate dance with unexpected steps, yet it felt just right. There would be challenges ahead, sure; but each was committed to overcoming them together.

And, in the end- you were glad that all of this was more than just the bet.

thank you all again so much for reading this mini-series; and I'm so sorry again that it took so long to get this part out, especially since part 3 was a cliff hanger. I appreciate you all <3 (also will be going through and editing better- I rushed the smut since I wanted to get this out today!)

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@calleyx13 @xxkittenkissesxx @fadingangelwisp @rumoured-whispers

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@renegadebirch

[wthphe1n]

I love how you write Vinny🫶 one of the best vinny writer out here! Can you give us some fluff for him? Like him and reader going to arcane but he canonically sucks at games lol^^

Token Me With You

Pairing: Vinny Hong x fem!reader

Genre: Fluff | Slice-of-life | Soft tsundere Vinny canon-compliant

Rating: PG

TW: None

A/N: here ya gooo all fluff no brakes and im still simping over that cheesecake fic lol appreciate the req and hope it hits right in the feels 😚 gotta whisper real quick im so damn proud of this pic i fixed up 🥹 Vinny’s SMILING. like full-on smile. I edited it myself worth every sec

(@kuchisabishiiiii @dzvelinaskebiyars @zyart-jpg @shintaru @sylith )

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

It’s Friday night, and the air outside is thick with the smell of rain.

You don’t even need to check your phone to know it’ll pour soon—the sky’s already a dim, heavy blue. But you don’t care. Not when you’ve been planning this for weeks.

You tug Vinny’s wrist harder as you pull him toward the glowing entrance of the arcade.

“You’re walking like someone’s forcing you to come,” you huff, half-joking.

He shoots you a look. That familiar, deadpan Vinny Hong look. All narrowed eyes and that crooked mouth he doesn’t even realize he has when he’s annoyed. Or pretending to be.

“I told you,” he mutters. “I suck at these games.”

You don’t let go of his wrist. “You’re not here to win. You’re here for moral support.”

He scoffs. “You’re gonna need moral support after I crush your high scores.”

You giggle, satisfied. There it is. His pride, always just fragile enough to fall for your teasing.

The arcade lights spill like confetti—blues and magentas painting the side of Vinny’s face in neon. His hair, that fiery curl of red, is almost glowing under the fluorescent wash. You notice, not for the first time, how damn pretty he is when he’s not trying.

Your eyes follow the way his hand tightens around the joystick of the shooting game.

It’s been thirty seconds.

Game over.

“…How the hell,” he mumbles, narrowing his eyes at the screen.

You try so hard not to laugh. “You missed every single zombie.”

“I was reloading.”

“For thirty seconds?”

He grunts and rubs the back of his neck, stepping away like the machine personally insulted him. You slide in next to him, drop in another coin, and clear the first level with ease—leaning forward with focused eyes and quick fingers.

Vinny watches in silence. When you finally turn back to him, the corners of his lips are tugging upward—just slightly.

“You cheat,” he mutters.

You beam. “Nope. You just suck.”

He rolls his eyes. But then, before you know it, he’s at your side again—ready to try another game.

The claw machine is next. Because of course it is.

“That plushie,” you point, eyes sparkling. “The one with the little angry tiger face. That’s you.”

Vinny gives it a flat look. “You think I’m an angry tiger.”

“I think you’re an adorable angry tiger.”

He mutters something under his breath, steps up to the controls, and misses five times in a row.

“Don’t talk to me,” he grumbles.

You’re laughing now, hands pressed to your cheeks, eyes crinkled.

But then he says, “Close your eyes.”

You blink.

“…What?”

“Just. Close them.”

So you do.

You hear coins clinking. Plastic thuds. A soft curse.

And then—

A tiny plushie presses against your chest. It’s not the tiger. It’s a crooked little bear with one ear bigger than the other.

It’s ugly.

And somehow it’s the best thing anyone’s ever given you.

You open your eyes.

“I got it by accident,” he lies, looking away. “It dropped with the other one.”

You’re smiling so wide it hurts. “Thanks, Vin.”

He says nothing.

But his ears are red.

Later, you share a cheap bowl of udon from the food stall just outside the arcade. You both eat from the same bowl. He pretends not to notice when your chopsticks touch his. You pretend not to see how he saves the soft-boiled egg for you.

The rain starts on the walk home.

Not a downpour—just a soft, whispering kind of drizzle. The kind that clings to your hair and clothes and turns the city gold beneath the streetlights.

Vinny shrugs off his jacket without a word and drapes it over your head.

“I’m not gonna melt,” you say.

“You’re stupid,” he says.

You peek up at him through wet lashes.

“Say that again.”

“I said—”

“Stupid,” you echo with a grin. “Suits you better.”

His ears turn red again.

You love doing that.

The elevator dings softly at the 12th floor of your building. You step inside, shoes squeaking, the ugly bear plushie cradled in your arms.

Vinny lingers near the door, like he’s not sure if he should stay.

You nudge him with your shoulder.

“Come up. I have cheesecake.”

He pauses.

“You bought it for yourself?”

“Nope.”

“…You bought it for me?”

“Nope.”

He scoffs. “Then I’m not coming.”

You pull the puppy eyes card.

He caves immediately.

On your couch, you both sit cross-legged, wet hair dampening the cushions.

You pass him a plastic fork and the 7-Eleven cheesecake you bought that morning just in case—just in hope—he’d show up tonight.

He takes one bite.

“…Tastes like cardboard.”

You snort. “Shut up and eat it.”

He does.

You’re quiet for a moment. Rain tapping softly against the window. Arcade tokens still in your coat pocket. The plushie sitting between you.

Vinny’s voice breaks the silence.

“…Don’t get used to this.”

You glance at him.

“What?”

He’s looking at the ceiling, eyes unreadable.

“This kind of… stupid couple stuff.”

You smile gently.

“Too late.”

He finally meets your eyes.

And when you lean in to press a kiss to his cheek—quick, featherlight, just a thank you—he doesn’t flinch.

Just mutters:

“…Idiot.”

But he doesn’t stop you when you rest your head on his shoulder.

And when you fall asleep like that, with the glow of the city outside and the arcade lights still dancing behind your eyelids—

You don’t see him smiling.

But he is.

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

[varethane]

Hey guess what!! Dashcon Two is tomorrow, and I've got a table at it :D

They're also holding a Virtual Con for folks who can't join in person, and I set up a special shopfront just for the show-- you can find it right here: https://varethane.bigcartel.com/

I have 2 more special limited-edition stickers for the show that I'll share soon. Meanwhile, looking forward to tomorrow!

[notarmedandnotdangerous]

+18 mdni! hysteria; a fic where bucky's unfortunate enough to run into a feared mercenary, which ended up being you.

cw: mercenary!reader, thunderbolts*!bucky, brief description of gore, reader calls bucky 'bucket', reader's lowkey crazy but its ok, the thunderbolts* get involved, no smut yet, reader interacts with, and eventually joins the thunderbolts*

word count: >6k

a/n: hey so this was a lot of fun to write hehe 😋 my idea for this was crazy meets crazy. anyways i am SO busy i cant believe it i cant finish my work at all 💔 anyways yes there will be a second part. or third. when im done with it. :)

[1] [2] (soon!)

!! @swiftie-fault

it’s quiet, too quiet. 

the warehouse was supposed to be crawling with armed men, intel said there’d be a deal going down. 

bucky had his pistol drawn, metal fingers flexing. he expected noise, yelling, movement, a classic ‘bad guy’ setup.

when he finally steps through the front entrance though? 

blood.

bodies. slumped over crates, limbs twisted in ways that shouldn’t even be possible. one guy’s head was cracked clean open like a melon, brain matter sprayed against a rusted wall.

his breath hitches, and his grip tightens on his gun when he hears the sound of boots thudding.

“fuck.”

too late, you were already here.

your boots hit the floor like a warning shot, echoing throughout the warehouse. 

bucky spins, gun raised, only for you to kick it clean from his hand like it’s a toy. 

you’re grinning, blood splattered across your cheek, fingers twitching like you’re already craving round two.

he grabbed another gun from his holster, and it was back up in a flash.

“hey! you’re that guy. what’s your name again? bucket?” you call out.

“don’t,” he growls. “don’t come near me.”

“wow, rude. didn’t even do anything yet.” your grin only widens.

bucky doesn’t back away, just held his ground. his eyes were locked on yours, like keeping you in his sights was the only thing that’d keep him breathing.

“i know who you are.” he says, tightly. “you’re that ghost, operative zero. trained by some off-grid black cell, eastern european, maybe russian. rumour is, they dumped you into warzones as a teenager, just to push you to your limits, just to see what you’d survive. you kill without orders, no chain of command, you’re a fucking wildcard.”

you raise a brow at him.

“hmm.” you paused. “not even close.”

bucky’s grip on the gun falters for a second, and you take another step forward.

“they wish they trained me.” you laughed. “truth is, they tried. i left a hole in their program the size of three floors before i walked out.”

“..what?”

“oh, and that warzone story? cute. i was the one that started the wars.”

his expression hardens, but there’s a flicker of doubt behind his eyes now.

you tilt your head at him.

“people love making up stories when they’re too scared to ask me themselves, but i like yours.” your expression fell flat. “like, ‘operative zero’? has a ring to it, real fucking dramatic.”

he tenses, he thinks you’d pull some shit immediately, but you didn’t.

“got anything else to share?”

“you’re a freelancer, a merc for hire, but you don’t follow contracts. you do whatever you want whenever you want. you always do more, do too much.”

“more?”

“you take jobs, but go off-script, and turn the whole place into a fucking slaughterhouse. you’re sent to kill one guy, and you end up killing twelve. you’re hired to get intel, and you burn the entire place down. you act like it’s justice, but you don’t follow any rules, not even your own.”

“oh, you sound just like my last employer, cute. too bad he’s dead now.”

another slow step forward, and bucky gulps.

“i bet.” he groans. 

“you make it sound like i mess up every fucking job.”

“well it’s because you fucking do. you just make it look intentional.”

“well, maybe i am a little overenthusiastic.” you shrugged. “and maybe people should stop hiring me to kill one scumbag if they don’t want the rest of the operation bleeding out too.” 

“are you fucking hearing yourself right now?” bucky growls.

“honestly? i don’t see the problem. i finish the job, and clean up while i’m at it.”

the tension radiating off bucky was palpable. he’s coiled tight, like a spring that’s about to snap. his gun was still up, eyes locked, breathing steady.

“tell me something, bucket.” you gestured loosely around the carnage. 

“it’s bucky.” he replied.

“whatever.” you shrugged. “you see all this, and you still think i’m going to let you walk? think i’m going to believe you’ll keep that mouth of yours shut? that you won’t run back to your little team, and tell them exactly what you saw?”

bucky gulps when you take another step closer.

“you think we’re on the same side, soldier?”

you could see the hesitation behind him, the calculation, like he’s trying to figure out if you’re going to let him walk out of here alive.

“you weren’t supposed to be here.” his finger tightens on the trigger, still pointing his gun at you.

“you weren’t supposed to be this late.”

his jaw ticks.

“you don’t trust anyone, i get that.” he lowers his gun slowly to the ground, putting his hands up, in hopes that you’d trust him. “but i’m not here to play hero, and i’m not going to pretend you didn’t do what you did either, but i do know what kind of men they were.”

your eyes flicker, just for a second.

“i’m not here to report you. i’m just here to do my job, clear them out, and leave with my organs intact.”

you stare at him for a long beat.

“fair enough.”

bucky slowly lowers his hands, he thinks he can leave now.

“but just so we’re clear,” you add. “if you so much as breathe my existence to anyone, your team, anyone, i’ll find you. you know that right?”

he nods once, steady.

“cool.” you smile again. “now let’s see if you’re fast enough to earn that exit.”

because trust was cute. but survival? that was the real game.

bucky was already diving for his knife.

“god, you’re so tense. that vibranium arm’s got to be heavy with all those repressed emotions.”

he lunges.

the fight was a blur, fast, and brutal. you’re unpredictable, laughing through the hits. you bleed, but don’t seem to notice. you get him on the ground twice, knife at his throat, but you don’t press.

“you’re slipping.” you murmur, disarming him once more, and pointing his own gun at him. “the serum losing its kick? or are you just not trying anymore?”

bucky grits his teeth, drives his vibranium fist into your gut with enough force to fold most people in half. 

you double over, and then choke out a laugh.

“shit, that one actually hurt. but still slow, i let you get that hit in.”

“shut up-”

“but hey, no one’s perfect.”

he doesn’t speak, just grabs you by the throat instead. he shoves you back, slamming you against a crate as his grip tightens, hand over your windpipe, cutting off your air supply.

you go still, eyes glassy, lips parted.

“you really need a hobby.” he growls.

“this is my hobby.” a low whine slips out as he presses harder against your throat. “you choke me like this, and still think i’m a freak? talk about mixed signals.”

that’s it. bucky throws you, and you crash into a stack of crates.

before you could get up, he slams his knee into your ribs, finally landing a good, solid hit that makes your vision flicker. 

it was enough, just barely.

you’re grinning when he flees, limping out the back exit, not even bothering to look over his shoulder.

“i’m giving you a headstart, bucket! be grateful, i usually don’t!”

—

hours later, bucky’s back at the compound. he thought he had fled far enough. he was sore, bruised, bleeding from multiple cuts on his body. he locks the door, sets his gun down, and tries to forget the shitstorm from earlier. 

you were probably still lying in a puddle of blood, laughing at the ceiling, and somehow that comforted him.

he breathes, tries to relax. he barely even made it to the compound’s common room. his hands were trembling as he reaches for the light switch, then bam.

you slam him into the floor, pinning him down hard, one knee between his shoulder blades, and a blade cold against his neck.

bucky grunts, trying to twist free, but you’ve got him perfectly caged.

“told you i’d catch up.” you spoke, but your voice was winded. it wasn’t from the fight, but it sounded like the act of moving alone was costing you something.

he grunted, twisting. the pressure you applied wasn’t playful, it was calculated, and precise. your knee pressed harder, and he could hear the slight hitch in your breath as you leaned in. 

you were hurt.

before he could snarl back, you were cut off by the thunderbolts*.

“drop the weapon.” yelena calls out.

yelena’s already got you in her sights, john’s storming in with a sidearm, and ava’s pacing with her weapon in hand, alexei lumbers behind them, gun drawn.

“get off the soldier,” alexei snaps. “we will shoot.”

you don’t even look at them, just kept grinning, comfortably astride bucky like he’s your chair.

“wow, this your crew? cute. you guys rehearse that?”

ava clicks her tongue at you.

you were comfortable on top of bucky. your smirk was perfect, but he could feel you trembling. the way your weight shifted, trying to ease pressure off your left side, the faint twitch in your knee, just above where his spine pressed into the floor. your balance was slightly off.

you were in serious pain, but no one noticed yet, except for him.

“final warning.” john snarls.

then finally, you lift your gaze. 

“are you pointing those at me because im dangerous, or because your soldier here didn’t finish the job?”

bucky grunts beneath you, trying to shift, but the pressure of your knee on him made it hard to breathe. 

you casually press the blade a little closer, just enough to make him go still.

“there’s five of us, and one of you. you’re surrounded.”

“so was the last room i walked into. didn’t help them much.”

yelena’s finger tightens on the trigger.

“stand down.”

you lean in, and whisper to bucky.

“are you going to tell them to shoot, bucket?”

“last chance.” ava commands.

then, you sigh, loud, and dramatically, like you’re the one being inconvenienced. you casually get off of bucky, letting him scramble to his feet. you raised your hands mockingly as you straighten up, knife still twirling between your fingers like it belongs there more than a gun ever would.

“relax,” you say. “i wasn’t going to kill him.”

“then what the hell was that?” john asked.

“that? that was me having a good time.” 

“you think this is fun?” bob tilted his head at you.

you gestured at bucky.

“he’s fast, strong, and paranoid as fuck. great chase, 10 out of 10.” then you glanced at the others. “you should’ve seen him in that warehouse, real feral, almost impressive.”

“you broke into a secure government compound to play tag?” ava cocks her gun.

“basically.”

“you are insane.” alexei blinks.

“maybe, but it’s not like i came here to assassinate anyone.” you stretch your hand out for bucky to grab, but he refused, slapping your hand away. “well, not this time.”

“so.. what do you want?” yelena asked.

“entertainment.” your hands spread like you were performing for an audience.

“you’re unhinged.” ava mutters.

“thank you.” you winked at her.

the entire room’s still on edge, guns still raised. but now? now they’re all fucking confused. you weren’t following any pattern, not negotiating, threatening, or trying to escape. you were actually bored.

you clap your hands together lightly, and everyone flinches visibly.

“well? i don’t have all day. i’m dying to know which one of you would actually want to pull the trigger. would be the kill of the century huh?”

nobody shoots. they wanted to, terribly, but no one pulls the trigger, because they know who you are. even though you said the information in the files were fake, they believed them anyway. they read all your files, the redacted ones, the ones with more black lines than actual words.

no one moves, so you move for them.

you stroll past them, knife sheathed, hands on your hips. then you drop, right onto the common room couch, like this was your place.

yelena lowers her gun slowly.

“you’re serious.”

“i am sitting down, aren’t i?” you say, kicking your boots up on the table. “i know what you want, so go ahead. ask me questions, offer me a job, or tell me i’m dangerous, and unstable, and everything your intel had warned you about. let’s get this over with.”

you didn’t mention your injuries at all, even when you crossed the room, and dropped yourself dramatically onto the couch, you flinched. it was just a flicker in your jaw, your lips thinning, breath catching.

alexei furrows his brow, and when yelena puts her gun back in her holster, everyone follows, reluctantly.

“this is a bad idea.” john mutters under his breath.

bucky though? he’s standing, rigid, in the corner of the room, jaw tight. he noticed everything, he saw it.

no one saw how tight you were holding your stomach, or how you never leaned too far to the left.

it made his blood boil, because if you were that banged up, then what the actual fuck were you doing? breaking into the most secure building in the country, and then jumping him? that wasn’t desperation, it was fucking obsession.

he’s staring at you, like you were a ticking time bomb someone decided to decorate the living room with.

“okay, this is awkward. come on, talk already.”

“we’ve read your files, you’re capable, efficient, if we can call it that.”  john sat next to you on the couch, keeping a safe distance from you.

“flattery gets you nowhere, walker.”

then yelena cuts in, with her arms crossed.

“we don’t like the way you work, but we understand it. you don’t just kill for sport, you go after targets that matter. you take out the whole system.”

“aw, are you starting to get me, miss belova?”

she ignores it.

“what if we gave you names? resources, intel, let you work with a team, so the collateral damage is.. less.”

“so, what you’re saying is, you want me leashed.”

ava shakes her head.

“we want you pointed, there’s a difference.”

john continues. 

“we’ve worked with worse.” he pauses. “well, all of us are terrible, honestly.”

“he is not working with us.” bucky spoke from the corner where he’s at.

“you’re dangerous, unpredictable, but you’re not broken. you want to do something right, but in your own way, and that’s what this team is. none of us are here because we fit in, we’re here because we don’t.” ava spoke.

that actually earns a pause from you, a long, unreadable look.

they wait.

then, you sigh, loud, and drawn out.

“mmm.. nah.”

silence.

yelena blinks.

“..what?”

you kick your legs off the table, stretching.

“i get the appeal, honestly i do. you’re a dysfunctional found family, tragic pasts, cool gear, but genuinely? you’re boring.”

“we’re offering you protection, weapons, a base, and a purpose, for fuck’s sake.” john exclaims.

you scratch the back of your neck, looking around.

“yeah, and fluorescent lights, shared bathrooms, and a bunch of emotionally scarred people, so no thanks.”

yelena steps forward. 

“you’re not walking out of here again.”

“are you sure you want to stop me, belova?”

the tension in the room shifts, and their confidence wavers.

because now? you’re uninterested, and that’s worse. 

because if you didn’t want anything, then that meant they couldn’t control you. you weren’t bargaining, you weren’t even playing along.

“so what? you’re just going to walk out, and keep doing that thing you do?” alexei asks.

“unless i find something more fun.” you tossed your knife into the air, catch it by the tip, and pointed it at bucky, without looking at him. “or unless one of you becomes more fun.”

then they realised, they had made a big mistake. 

they opened the door to the deadliest mercenary currently on the face of the earth.

they thought bringing you in would contain you, tame you. but you weren’t a rogue asset, they mistook you for a weapon without a handler. 

the mistake they made was assuming you wanted something, something they could bargain with. but you weren’t chasing a cause, you were chasing chaos that felt right to you. you already know what was wrong with the world, you just didn’t believe in fixing it neatly.

and now that they’ve let you in? you know the layout, you know their rhythms, their weaknesses. you’ve looked each of them in the eye, and now you’re in their fucking heads.

you were halfway to the door, hands in your pockets.

“wait.” john’s voice cuts through the silence.

you pause mid-step. 

“you people are really clingy for a team that pointed guns at me thirty minutes ago.”

“we figured out what you want, operative.” john continued.

“oh? enlighten me, please. i’ve been wondering about that myself.” you spoke, feigning awe.

“we have someone.” yelena was about to walk towards you, but alexei stopped her.

“oh? don’t tell me you’re offering me a friendship bracelet, or in this case, friendship assassin.” you look over your shoulder.

“not just anyone. someone you’ve shown.. interest in.” ava steps up, arms crossed.

“going to need more than that, pretty. i’ve got very specific tastes.” you wink at ava, and she groans.

“you’re not looking for chaos, you’re looking for resistance.” yelena spoke.

“you get bored when things get too easy. you’re not in it for the paycheck, or the bloodshed. you’re in it for the challenge, for the adrenaline rush.” ava mentioned.

your smile widens, just a little.

and that’s when john tilts his head to bucky, who was currently standing stiff, eyes sharp with a gaze that screams ‘do not involve me’. 

“you want a challenge?” john speaks, and your eyes widen just a little. “there he is.” 

“the winter soldier! not bad, eh?” alexei exclaimed.

you blink, look at bucky, then back at the group. 

bucky stares, and anyone could tell that he was really fucking pissed.

“absolutely not. no fucking way.”

unfortunately for him, you’re already smiling, and pacing the room.

“oh.. that’s what this is. you’re offering me bucky barnes.”

“no one is offering me-” bucky gets cut off by yelena.

“we’re not offering him to you. what we’re trying to say is, if you join, you’ll get to work with him, closely.” yelena’s trying her best to convince you.

“same missions, same space.” ava added.

you weren’t even listening to them anymore. you were just watching the way bucky’s expression changes, watching how furious he was. to you, it was fucking delicious.

“now this is interesting.” you get closer to bucky, and he fucking flinches. “i’ve always wanted to see how your brain works.”

“i am not a fucking case study, operative.” bucky snaps at you, trying to remain as calm as he possibly could.

“no, but you’re a very pretty contradiction.” you winked at him, and he just rolls his eyes at you.

“you said you wanted someone fun, someone worth staying for.” yelena speaks, and bucky just groans.

“you want to understand someone? he’s the toughest to crack.” ava says.

“he’s.. very complex, and very different. i think you’ll like him, operative.” bob finally speaks.

you smirk, and turn towards bucky.

“he’s difficult to break, and that makes me really want to try.” 

“if you so much as touch me, i will kill you.” he snaps.

“aw, bucket. that’s the fucking dream.” 

“it’s bucky, for fuck’s sake.” he rolls his eyes at you. “at least get my name right.”

you step in close, and he backs up.

“you know what i really want to know, bucket? you look like you hate people like me, but deep down, you want to know how i work.” you tilt his chin up with one finger, and he tenses. “and i want to know how someone like you doesn’t snap. i want to know how you live with all that violence rotting under your skin without letting it out.”

he slapped your hand away, hard enough to sting.

you didn’t even react, just tilted your head.

but bucky saw it. the tiny recoil you tried to hide, the way you sucked in a breath through your teeth, and held it like your lungs weren’t cooperating.

“maybe i do, just not around you.” he quips.

“give it time.” you grin.

then you finally back up, and walk towards yelena. she was probably the one you respected the most, anyway.

yelena folds her arms.

“so.. is that a yes, operative?”

“i’ll think about it, miss belova.” you wink. “but don’t get too excited, i’m not here to be reformed, or contained.”

“that’s the problem with you.” bucky crossed his arms.

“relax, bucket. i’m not here to ruin your team, not unless they bore me, then i might.” then you’re up on your feet again. you sauntered towards the exit once more, and everyone stares. 

“wait- where are you going?” ava asks.

“out.” you reply. “call it a trust exercise.”

“you’re not even standing right.” bucky called out.

“excuse me?” you replied.

“left side, something’s cracked. i can see it.” then he took a step toward you. “you flinched getting up, and you haven’t taken a full breath since you walked in.”

the room went quiet, and everyone held their breath in fear of what you’d do. 

you didn’t say anything, just laughed.

“you should’ve gone into diagnostics, bucket. you’re wasting your talents.”

“don’t call me that.” he presses his fingers to his temples. “this is going to end so badly.” 

“god, i hope so.” you say, before leaving the compound.

you left like it was nothing. there was no goodbye, no threats.

and somehow, that made it so much worse.

you knew everything. the layout of the compound, the security keys, their weak points.

you could ruin their lives, come back, and pull the plug on every single fucking thing they worked for.

or you could just never come back, but knowing that you’re lurking in the shadows, just made everything a lot more unsettling for them.

“we shouldn’t have let him in.” yelena muttered.

“well, technically he let himself in, so-” john replied.

“too late for that, isn’t it?” ava cut him off.

ava wouldn’t stop checking the surveillance cameras, while john tried his best to stay awake, and guarded the entry. 

bucky though? he said nothing, but his eyes never left the door since you walked out.

—

the next morning, the common room was still, half-lit by the sunlight. 

yelena was the first to walk in, hoodie draped over her head.

then she freezes, immediately reaching for the closest weapon to point at you.

in her defence, she didn’t know it was you. you had your back faced to her anyway, so she couldn’t really tell.

you were sat on the kitchen counter, back faced to her. you ate dry cereal out of a box, like this was your house now, like you had never left.

you turn around to see yelena pointing a knife at you.

“oh, hey, good morning, miss belova.” you said casually, like you’ve always been here.

yelena blinks, hard, and lowers the kitchen knife.

“are you serious right now?”

then, alexei, bob, john, and ava walk in. they froze the moment they saw you on the kitchen counter. honestly, who wouldn’t be?

“..you came back.” bob asked.

“obviously.” you replied, still munching on the cereal. “hey, this is good.”

alexei beamed at your praise for the cereal.

“you disappeared. like, fully gone.” ava tilted her head at you.

“yeah, i do that.” you shrug.

“you know, we thought you bailed.” john shook his head. “thought you’d take advantage of the time you had here to memorise the layout of our tower.”

you smiled, leaning back.

“i did leave.” a pause. “but i didn’t bail.”

they all stared.

“i could’ve vanished, honestly i probably should have, but i didn’t.” you flick your eyes across each of them. “you let me in, stupid move, by the way. although it kind of stuck with me.” 

and just for a second, you weren’t playing, just honest. 

then, bucky enters the common room.

his gaze locked onto you, but he didn’t react. he just walked to the kitchen, and filled a glass of water.

“he came back.” yelena spoke.

“yeah, i see that.” his voice was neutral, unreadable, but his gaze kept flicking towards you.

“he didn’t even break in- wait, how did you get in?” bob asked. 

“then the perimeter held.” bucky sighed. “good.” 

“aww, you’re glad i’m here.” you cooed.

he doesn’t even blink, just continued.

“i’m just glad we don’t have to change the compound’s access codes again.” 

“is that your version of an ‘i miss you’, bucket?”

“don’t flatter yourself.” he says, bluntly. “and stop calling me that.”

they weren’t sure why you came back, honestly you didn't know either. 

but you’re really here, and for once, you felt wanted, sort of.

—

before you knew it, you were going on a mission with bucky.

the intel came easy. there was no real resistance, just a few guards dispatched like it was a warm-up. the both of you barely broke a sweat when you entered the base.

you were walking beside him, heading for the extraction point. you made fun of his grumpy silence, trying to get at least a smirk from him. you got one, somehow.

then, there was gunfire.

“ambush.” you ducked behind crates, pulled your blade without thinking while bucky returned fire. 

everything was efficient, sharp, until there were gunshots that echoed louder than the rest, accompanied by a broken noise coming from someone.

you turned, and watched bucky stumble. he was hit in the shoulder, and chest. he dropped behind cover, biting back a whimper. blood soaked through his tactical vest, and quick. his fingers fumbled as he pressed down on the wounds.

“bucky-”

“get out. keep moving.” he spoke, breathlessly.

but you didn’t. you stood there frozen for half a second, before something in your head snapped.

whatever happened next was a blur. all you knew was that someone had hurt him, and now they were going to pay for it.

you moved without thought, without hesitation. no stealth, no mercy, no calculation, just pure rage. you ripped bucky’s gun from him, and moved through the base like the black plague. 

you used whatever you had, knives, pistol, hands, whatever gets the job done, whatever gets them away from him. they screamed, but you didn’t hear them. throats were slashed, knees shattered, skulls cracked against the wall so fucking hard the concrete chips.

one tries to run, and you shot him in the spine, then walked over and crushed his skull under your feet. another hides behind the crates, you throw a blade into his throat, walk over, twist it, and ripped it back out.

you lost count of how many bodies you dropped, only stopping when there was nothing left to kill. by the time the base goes quiet, the ground was soaked, and the walls were fucking painted. then you sprinted back to him, blood on your hands.

bucky’s slumped against the crates, eyes glassy, hand pressed to his bleeding side. he’s still conscious, barely.

you drop to your knees beside him, hands suddenly twitching with a different kind of energy. it wasn’t adrenaline, or thrill, it was panic.

“bucky. hey- look at me.” you slap his cheek gently. “eyes open, come on.”

“..took you long enough.” he says, groggily.

you try to laugh, but it was shaky. your hands were soaked, some blood hid, some not, you can’t tell anyway.

“tried being reasonable. you got shot, that’s on you.”

“you murdered.. everyone.”

“yeah, you’re welcome.” 

bucky chuckles, then winces, and slumps harder against the crates.

your smile drops immediately.

“no. no. fuck, don’t pass out. don’t you fucking dare.” you press your fingers to his pulse, then sigh in relief when you felt it steady under your touch.

then you rip open a medkit you don’t even remember grabbing, hands suddenly fumbling.

“i don’t know how to- fuck. okay, stay awake.”

“i’m trying- fuck!” he groans when you press gauze to the gunshot wounds.

“you’ve been shot before, right? this is fine, you’re fine. i’ve seen worse. definitely.”

“you’re panicking, operative.”

“..shut up.”

“you went too far, that was a whole fucking massacre. you think that makes you heroic?” he growled. 

your jaw twitched, and you pressed slightly harder on the wound, making him whimper in pain.

“you lost your damn mind in there, y-you think that’s loyalty? you think wiping out everyone here in my name makes you better?” he grabs hold of your wrist, hoping you’d ease up.

“i wasn’t trying to be better, bucky.” you whispered. 

“no, you weren’t.” bucky sighs. “but you were trying to care, like i deserve that.”

you freeze, because how the actual fuck are you supposed to respond to that?

“you don’t get to decide if i’m worth something.” he continued. “you shouldn’t care.”

you stare at him, and laugh, but there was no humour in it.

“don’t start with that shit.” 

“i’m not worth it, not for someone like you.” 

“someone like me?” you tilt your head at him.

“you’re ruthless, don’t waste it caring for someone like me.”

then you reach for your utility belt, and pull out your pocket knife. you flip it open slowly.

“..what are you doing?” bucky asks.

you grab his hand, the flesh one, and flip it palm up.

“don’t.” he rasps.

you press the blade down against the meat of his palm, just hard enough to draw blood. it was a shallow, pointless slice, just enough for you to prove your point.

bucky flinches, and winces.

“there.” you wipe the blood off your blade, and slip it back into your utility belt.

the both of you watched as the blood started to pool in his hand. 

“that’s the price, isn’t it? pain? suffering? a punishment just because you’re someone worth saving?” you rose, slowly. your eyes locked onto his.

“operative-” he tried to speak, but you cut him off.

“you didn’t want me to care? fine. i hurt you, happy?” 

“..why would you do that?”

you tilted your head at him.

“because that’s what i thought you wanted, for fuck’s sake. you keep telling me you don’t deserve being cared for.”

he sighed when the bleeding finally stopped.

“i killed everyone, destroyed the whole op for you, and now you’re telling me i shouldn’t care?”

then there was a pause.

“so fine, i hurt you like you wanted me to. put me back in your little box of what i’m supposed to be. a threat, a freak, fucking unstable! that make you feel better?” you spoke, quieter now. “but i still came back.”

bucky doesn’t answer you, just stares down at his bloody hand, like he doesn’t know what to do with it. he really thought you’d end him, right when he was vulnerable, but you didn’t. instead, you chose to save him.

“you’re insane.”

you take a deep breath.

“next time i’ll let you bleed out if that makes you feel cleaner.” 

he slumped, and his hand curled into your jacket. he wasn’t pushing you away anymore, he was holding on.

—

a few hours later, bucky was admitted into the medbay for health checks.

you stood outside the glass, gazing in, for hours. you watched every shallow breath, every twitch of pain across his face. you don’t speak, don’t try to enter, just watched.

yelena finds you, eventually. she’s not dumb, she puts two, and two together.

“you didn’t just kill them because of the mission, did you?”

you said nothing.

“he’s not afraid of what you did, he’s afraid of why you did it.”

you finally glance at her.

“he said i shouldn’t care, miss belova.” you sucked in a breath. “so i made it fucking hurt.”

yelena watched you for a second, patted your shoulder, then walked away.

but eventually, the weight in your chest gets too heavy. you left the medbay, and you don’t come back.

—

now you’re back to your old ways, still part of the thunderbolts*, but violent, out of control, ruthless.

this was punishment. 

because bucky told you not to care, and you did anyway. the only way you knew how to survive it? it was to pretend he never mattered.

your newest target was a high-ranking official, knee-deep in weapons trafficking. 

you were sent to eliminate him, and his men. it was right up your lane, considering how you would usually clear the entire block while you’re at it.

over the last month after bucky’s injury, every op you touched ended in bodies stacked too high to count. you left messages in the form of bloodshed, enemies tortured, then killed, left as warnings.

this op? you insisted on going alone, but the thunderbolts* would be on standby as backup.

now you’re inside the villa. the job was almost done, you’ve reached the heart of the mansion. the politician’s cornered, shaking behind a line of armed guards.

you’re outnumbered, but it doesn’t really matter to you.

you were grinning, covered in blood. your knife dripped with blood from the guards you took out earlier. then you take down the first three like it was nothing. you were faster now, meaner too, like you didn’t give a fuck what happens to you.

you were beautiful in your madness, savage, and unrelenting. this was supposed to be it, until you heard it.

thump. thump- a pause. thump. thump.

that pattern, that rhythm. 

the sound of boots down the back corridor. 

bucky’s boots.

you froze mid-step, and your eyes flicked toward the hall, just for a second. 

it was just long enough for a guard to slam into you from the left, while another drives an elbow into your gut. 

you react, way too slow, very unlike you.

you snarled, trying to regain momentum, but they practically dogpile you. fists slammed into your sides, one to the head. you barely block a blade aimed for your throat.

then you hear the target’s voice shouting.

“kill him! bring me his head!”

your vision was tilting, and your eyes threatened to shut. you tried to rise, but a boot stops into your shoulder, grinding you down, and you cry out, eyelids fluttering as you fought to stay conscious.

you would’ve won, if it weren’t for that damn rhythm, that split second when your mind remembered a person instead of a missiom.

then, there’s a burst of gunfire. yelena yelled out commands, alexei crashed through the walls like a fucking tank.

the room erupts in chaos, guards scatter, and the politician screamed.

you were still on the floor, blinking tears of pain out of your eyes when bucky drops beside you. he gripped onto your vest, dragging you back to cover. only when you saw him, did you allow yourself to rest. 

“..knew it was you.”

“what the hell were you thinking, operative?!” he yelled at you, obviously furious.

“didn’t think.. you’d come for me..” 

“clearly.” 

you let out a weak laugh, then coughed. it hurt like hell.

“you.. walk like a soldier. left-heavy. a short pause between your third, and fourth step. your foot drags a little on the right, every.. damn time.”

“what?”

“i recognised your pacing. that’s what got me hit.”

bucky blinks, caught off guard.

“..you’re insane.”

“..yeah, no shit.” you sighed.

“you hesitated, you never hesitate.” he continued.

“..didn’t think you’d actually show up.”

he exhales sharply, and looks down at you.

“why the hell wouldn’t i?”

“you didn’t want me to care, so i figured it was mutual.” you shrug.

that’s when it clicks. 

you didn’t flinch when surrounded. you didn’t hesitate when you were faced with all those armed men, but you hesitated when he showed up. deep down, no matter how violent you became, you still cared.

you weren’t just killing harder, you were punishing yourself for feeling too much.

“you’re not fooling anyone anymore.”

“i thought.. it’d be easier to hate me if i made it ugly enough.” 

“fucking hell..”

“i didn’t stop caring, i just got better at hiding it.” then you go limp against the floor, consciousness slipping.

[skzdominate]

BREAKUP VACATION

Han Jisung x fem!black! Reader

NOT REQUESTED

Sharing a bed with needy ex-boyfriend Han on a trip you both didn't cancel after the breakup.

word count: 5.46k

PLEASEEE if you enjoy this like, comment, and repost I spent literal DAYSS on this🙏🏾🙏🏾

also can somebody friggin request something on this account I'm desperate (more weak hero posts soon on @parkjihoonswifey)

WARNINGS: smut 18+, oral (f), fingering (f), use of y/n, angst(although I'm terrible at it), I can't think straight I've been up all night editing this.

no it's not proofread blow me I haven't slept in 29 hours and I have work at 11 today 🥀🥀

also ts kinda buns...

REBLOG TO MAKE ME FAMOUS GUYS.

WE AIN'T EVEN FAMOUS!!! (tarzzan or whoever you spell it he so fine i don't give a damn about them cornrows he looks the fuck good to me😩😩

PUT MY SNEAKERS ON!! HA-NA DUL READY GET SET GO(this is me starting the story)

Your last fight with jisung wasn't like the others. You didn't scream at him, he didn't scream at you. You didn't say much, just a silent plea for him to notice your insecurities—notice you.

Your relationship was great. You loved him like an idiot, and he loved you ten times greater. You stayed together when he wasn't at dorms, and when he was there, so were you.

The fans weren't always a problem, but the more you saw—the more edits, the more tweets, the more comments that flooded under his posts—you couldn't help but feel some type of way.

Han was always busy, whether it was practicing, producing, tours, anything else, he almost never had time for you during the day.

Over time, he got more annoyed when you brought it up, but never showed it too much. “I'm sorry you feel like that” and “I'm right here” turned into "You're talking crazy" and "Stop overthinking it so much". It made you sick to your stomach, and made you wonder how you let him treat you like this.

One thing never changed. Every night before a tour, he'd leave you a gift—usually a small piece of jewelry or he'd take you out. Then a few hours later, he left. He'd go on stage and look amazing. It always made you feel jealous, even if you knew what was yours.

This particular fight, though—your last fight—started over something completely different. Not the fans, not the insecurities—something completely worse.

"Jisung," you say calmly to him, walking into the living room where he sat, laid back and man spreading on the couch. He barely looked up from his phone, muttering a small "hm?".

You tried to control your anger, you really did. You took a deep breath, "Have you been telling the guys about our sex life?" You cross your arms, hands shaking. He drops his phone into his lap, and looks up at you with pretty eyes. His skin looked so beautiful—tan the way you loved, cheeks soft, and lips thick. He looked so perfect.

"I might've," he holds his hands up in defeat, "but it's not like we really have one, do we? I mean between shows and you being mad all the time, we haven't had sex in a while," he stands, headed towards the kitchen unbothered.

You follow him though, "what the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"It means what I said. We haven't had sex since I got back from the last tour—that's almost two weeks now. Don't act surprised."

"Well sorry that I'm surprised that my own boyfriend isn't satisfied with our sex life! Am I the problem for not being in the mood sometimes?"

He steps forward, his hands slowly finding their way to your waist, but you push him away, "Not the time, Jisung. Are you gonna talk to me like an actual man or should I go?"

He turns away, but doesn't answer immediately. The silence breaks your heart." Maybe you should.”

You honestly were surprised. You walked away, eyes starting to water, packing a small bag and texting Chan. He watched you move, eyes never leaving you.

“Where are you gonna go? You don't have anywhere to go.”

“Away from you, away from all this. I'll go to San’s house for all you care,” you lied. You grab your car keys—about the only thing of yours he didn't pay for—and headed towards the door.

He ran up behind you, grabbing your shoulder and pinning you to the wall next to the door. His eyes were shocked, sad, and helpless. He looked confused, not knowing what to do or say.

“Baby, I didn't mean it, nothing I said. You know I'm under pressure and I'm just stressed. But going to your ex’s house? lowball, even for you.”

You push him off of you, brows shifting in anger, “The only “ex’s” now are me and you. It's over, Jisung. For real.” You reach for the door before he can stop you, already outside and dialing Chan's number.

“Hello?” he answers on the second ring.

“Hey, Chan. I just—I just had a fight with Jisung. Can I come to your dorm?”

“Holy shit. Of course you can. What happened?” he questions, background noise suggesting he just sat up out of bed.

“I'll explain when I get there,” you make your way down the stairs and out the main door.

“No problem, take your time. Be careful driving.”

“Yeah, thanks”

you hang up, making your way out to the garage.

❀⊱┄┄┄┄⊰❀

You pull up to Chan waiting outside for you. By this time, you had tears streaming down your face and ruined eyelashes. You quickly got out, still aware that you're in public and hurried over to where he stood in a cap and mask. He took them off when he saw you approach, and immediately pulled you in for a hug.

“Aww, Bug, are you okay?” he wraps his arms around your back, right hand rubbing up and down slowly. You stood there crying for a second before pulling away.

“I'm sorry for making you come out here. we can go inside,” you pass him and go into the back door to the building.

Once inside, the other members see you and question, but Chan pushes them away and leads you to his room.

“Stay here for as long as you need, get comfortable. Do you wanna explain,” he sits carefully on the bed next to you. You fall into him, arms around his neck, face buried into his chest.

“I just loved him endlessly and he told me to leave because I asked him if he was telling you guys about our sex and he basically said he wasn't satisfied with me. Then he tried kissing me and I refused so he got upset,” You had wiped your runny nose on your sleeve, and Chan wiped the tears from your eyes.

You sat in silence for a few minutes, chan pulling you in and stroking your hair to comfort you.

You had calmed down a bit—enough to stop crying. “I just don't feel appreciated and I broke up with him and it feels like I shouldn't have. I love him, Chris. I really do.”

He nods along, carefully choosing his next words, “I think being alone for a while will be good for both of you. You're both my best mates, and you look pretty damn good together. I think you just need a break, or to be alone with him—not worrying about fans, friends, sex. It'll do you some good, kiddo. Think about it,” and the next second he's off the bed and out the room. You let your body fall back against his sheets, and before you know it you're passed out.

❀⊱┄┄┄┄⊰❀

You woke up in Chan’s bed, sweaty and missing a shoe. Your hair was a mess and your tears stained his pillowcase. Your vision wasn't fully there, but you could hear the faint voice of Chan and someone else across the room.

Jisung laid lazily on the floor, and Chan sat in his chair by his desk.

“I messed up, Chan. And I love her too much. I don't know what to do.”

“Look, Ji. I can't give you great advice. What you did was wrong. Telling me and the boys about private stuff was wrong, and you need to put yourself in her shoes.”

“I'm trying to, chan. Its just-”

❀⊱┄┄┄┄⊰❀

You wake up again, this time to a room full of quiet. Chan’s bed still smells like laundry detergent and pinewood cologne. The ache behind your eyes is sharp, but your body feels heavier now—like the weight of crying so hard yesterday is still clinging to your bones.

You roll over, face against the mattress for a minute before slowly sitting up. You blink against the weak sunlight streaming through the crack in the blinds, legs swinging over the side. Your shoe is missing. You find it under Chan’s bed and put it back on before tiptoeing out to the living room. It’s empty now. A note on the counter reads: “Went to the studio. Take your time. I stocked the fridge.”

It’s signed with a little smiley face and wolfchan next to it.

You breathe in slowly, then out.

Eventually, you gather your things, call a cab, and head back to your apartment. Everything feels muffled and slow—like you’re walking through fog. The moment you step into your place, it’s like the silence rushes to meet you. No shoes at the door next to yours. No jacket on the rack. No spare beanie he always left on your kitchen chair. It’s really over.

You shower. The water is too hot and your skin feels like it's on fire under the stream, but it’s the first time in a while you feel clean. Not in the physical way—but in the way that says, I can start again. You let it rinse over you until your fingers wrinkle.

After wrapping yourself in a towel, you sit on your bed and check your phone. That’s when you see it—a notification from your calendar app:

“3 Days Until Trip w/ Jisung 💕✈️”

You’d forgotten. You both planned this two months ago—something quiet, out of the country, somewhere he promised wouldn’t have fans or cameras. A place you could both be just people. Just in love.

You stare at the notification for a long moment before going to your contacts.

You:

Can we talk?

Just on the phone. Please.

He replies almost instantly.

Jisung:

Yeah. I’m free.

You call.

He picks up on the first ring.

“Hey.”

His voice is hoarse, careful. Like he’s holding it with both hands.

“Hey,” you say softly. There’s a pause. You swallow. “I got the reminder. About the trip.”

Another pause. You can hear a car passing in the background on his end. “Yeah... I didn’t cancel it. Just in case.”

“I don’t wanna miss it,” you admit quietly. “I think... even if everything’s messy right now, we shouldn’t throw this away too.”

He hums, something a little smug bleeding into his voice. “So what you’re saying is... you miss me.”

You sigh. “No, Jisung.”

“You miss me already and you’re using this trip as an excuse to see me again—”

“I’m not using anything as an excuse,” you retaliate, sitting up straighter. “I’m not even ready. The plane leaves in three days.”

“That’s plenty of time,” he says casually. “Book yourself a lash appointment. And nails. And eyebrows, and whatever else you want, I'll pay. I know you love looking good.”

“Jisung,” you warn. “Don’t do that.”

“I am doing that,” he says, and you hear the ping of a notification on your end. You check your phone.

It’s a text.

💳: XXXX-XXXX-XXXX-0325

Expiration: 03/26

CVC: 325

“Are you insane?” you ask, blinking. “You just sent me your card info?”

“Yup,” he says, proud. “Go get your shit done. I know you won’t do it unless I force you. Consider it my for now apology.”

“I don’t want your money.”

“I don’t care,” he says, voice softening now. “I want to see you. Not even to fix things right away—just to be somewhere without all the noise. Just us.”

There’s silence for a second. You don’t realize you’ve been holding your breath until your lungs start to ache.

Finally, you exhale. “Okay.”

“Okay?”

“Yeah.”

“Alright, baby,” he says, voice gentle but laced with the cockiness you pretend to hate. “Pack light. I’m gonna make you forget we ever fought.”

You roll your eyes. “Don’t push it.”

He laughs. “See you soon.”

When the call ends, you sit there for a moment. The weight’s still there—but lighter now. A flicker of warmth settles in your chest, and for the first time in hours, you let yourself smile. Just a little.

Maybe it isn’t fixed.

But it isn’t finished either.

❀⊱┄┄┄┄⊰❀

✈︎ Three Days Later ✈︎

The airport buzzes like a beehive—air thick with the scent of coffee, perfume, and exhaustion. You pull your suitcase behind you, looking just a little too good for someone who barely slept last night. You’re not sure if it’s the lashes, the braids that are tightly pulling at your scalp, the fresh brows, the glossed lips—or the faint hope curled in your stomach—but your confidence is back, even if your heart’s still cautious.

You spot him by the check-in kiosk, hoodie over his head, a duffle slung low on his shoulder. His mask is hanging loose around his chin, AirPods in and of course he’s on his phone.

Typical.

You roll your suitcase up to him and clear your throat. Loudly.

Jisung looks up and stops in his tracks, gaze roaming slowly, deliberately.

His mouth tugs into a smug smile. “Damn.”

You blink. “What?”

He raises a brow and gestures lazily with his fingers. “The Braids. The nails. The lashes. The fit—” he tugs the hem of your top teasingly—“You went all out.”

“Don’t act surprised.”

“Oh, I’m not surprised,” he says with a grin. “Just impressed. And proud. Mostly because I paid for all of it.”

You scoff, tugging your sleeve away.

“What? you look good,” he says, winking. “Let me at least look at what I bought.”

“Jisung, you sent me your credit card information and forced me to.”

“Yeah. And it worked, didn’t it?” He falls in step beside you as you both head toward security. “I knew you wouldn’t let yourself show up looking like a raccoon again.”

You punch his arm lightly, and he hisses. “Ow!”

“That was for the ‘again.’”

After security, you both find yourselves waiting at the gate. He insists on getting food, dragging you to a ramen bar tucked behind a convenience store. You try to keep the conversation surface-level—weather, music, bad airport design—but his knee keeps bumping yours under the table, and when he slurps his noodles too loudly, you side-eye him.

“Can you not eat like a wild animal?”

“This is my happy slurp,” he says, eyes twinkling. “It means I’m in a good mood.”

You shake your head, sipping your soup quietly. He pauses mid-bite, watching you. There’s something soft in his gaze—like he can’t quite believe you’re here, across from him again.

You feel it, too. But neither of you say it. This trip wasn't going to be awkward, you could tell by the way it was now—how he could laugh with you, compliment you, and how you didn't let your hurt show but instead replaced it with sarcasm and jokes that didn't feel fake.

___

Boarding.

You’re herded into the plane like cattle, except you’re the lucky kind—first class. Your seats are the lie-flat kind, with the fancy partitions and the silk-lined pillows. Except there’s a small catch.

Your “suite” is... connected. Intimately. A shared pod with a single double-sized bed across the middle, mood lighting glowing faintly along the edges.

You glance at the flight attendant. “Are we supposed to—?”

Jisung grins. “Yup.”

“This is for couples.”

“We were a couple when we booked it,” he says, setting his bag down casually. “We both paid half. That means we share.”

You huff and throw your purse into the corner of the bed. “I’ll sleep on the floor.”

“Oh my god,” he groans, already reclining. “You’re so dramatic. Just sleep. I don’t bite.”

You shoot him a look. “Yes, you do.”

He smirks and adjusts his pillow. “Only when you asked me to.”

You throw a packet of peanuts at his head.

❀⊱┄┄┄┄⊰❀

10+ hours later...

You land in Santorini. It’s sunset—gold light melting across the island, painting everything in creamsicle hues. The villa shuttle waits just outside the terminal, and the salty breeze carries promises you’re not ready to believe yet.

The hotel itself is breathtaking. Built into the cliffs, whitewashed stone walls glowing soft against the ocean beyond. But of course—

“There’s only one bed,” you say flatly, staring at the room’s massive centerpiece.

Jisung shrugs behind you. “For the second time today—We booked this before what happened. Of course it’s one bed.”

“I’ll sleep on the couch.”

“There is no couch,” he says. “Just that weird rattan chair and... a big window.”

You spin around. “Then I’ll sleep on the floor.”

“Nope,” he says, popping the ‘p.’ “We’re sharing. We’re adults. And we both paid half.”

“That’s your excuse for everything.”

“And it’s a damn good one.”

You narrow your eyes but say nothing.

He walks past you, dropping his bags by the closet. “Fine. Sleep where you want. But if you get cold and crawl in next to me at 3am, I will say ‘I told you so.’”

You hurl a pillow at his head. Again.

—

The Day’s Itinerary

1. The Villa Tour

A guide meets you both outside your room, walking you through the property. Olive trees line the paths. There’s a private pool. The kind of view Instagram would kill for. You pretend to be unimpressed, but Jisung is awe-struck—pointing at every archway, every bougainvillea bloom.

“Holy crap, is that a grapevine?” he exclaims, reaching up to touch it.

“Don’t touch the grapes,” the guide warns gently.

You stifle a laugh, “Yeah, idiot.”

“Do you wanna fight?” he grabs your waist, lifting you up off the ground and slinging you over his shoulder ( Han Jisung detwinkification *licks lips and rubs hands together*). You yelp, hitting his back and laughing.

The guide side-eyes you both the rest of the tour.

2. Couples Yoga

You hadn’t realized “couples yoga” meant actual synchronized poses. You try not to laugh as Jisung struggles to hold a downward dog while the instructor pushes his hips into place.

“My hips don’t bend like that, dude!” he whines, wobbling.

“They usually do,” you mutter under your breath, forgetting yourself for a second.

He freezes.

You freeze.

Then you both start laughing.

You fall sideways on your mat, tears forming from how hard you’re giggling. It’s stupid, awkward, and entirely necessary.

The instructor cuts the session short.

3. Brunch by the Sea

A glass patio overlooks the Aegean. The restaurant is decked in airy whites and creams, soft music humming in the background. You order lemon ricotta pancakes with fig jam. Jisung gets something stupid involving squid and eggs.

You steal a bite anyway. He lets you.

At one point, you both go quiet. He looks at you over his glass of orange juice.

“I’m glad we came.”

You nod slowly. “Me too.”

4. Gift Shopping in Town

You wander cobblestone streets lined with tiny shops. Jisung buys a matching pair of seashell bracelets without saying anything. Just slips one onto your wrist like he’s done a hundred times.

“I thought we weren’t doing cheesy couple stuff,” you say.

“It’s not couple stuff. It’s just... shells from a guy trying to get his girl back..”

“You’re the worst.”

He grins.

You buy him a handmade journal and a pen carved from olive wood.

He doesn’t say anything, but he tucks it carefully into his bag like it’s fragile.

5. Movie on the Beach

A makeshift screen flutters in the breeze, beanbags arranged in rows under the stars. You both huddle under a shared blanket, sipping from coconuts and ignoring the rom-com playing onscreen.

When the couple kisses, Jisung makes a joke under his breath. “They look like they’ve never kissed before.”

You raise an eyebrow. “And you’re a professional?”

“I have a PhD in kissing.”

You scoff. “You got that from TikTok.”

“I got it from you.”

Your face burns, but you don’t pull away when his pinky brushes yours under the blanket.

6. Private Beach at Night (yes, you booked it)

The water’s cold, but the moon is warm. Or maybe it’s the way Jisung’s hand keeps finding yours every few minutes, like he forgets he shouldn’t.

You both walk the shoreline in silence, toes in the sand, wind pulling gently at your clothes.

“I really messed up, didn’t I?” he says finally, voice low.

You look at him. “Yeah.”

He swallows. “I’m sorry. For the fans, the comments, the way I brushed it off. For making you feel like you weren’t enough.”

“I never said I wasn’t enough,” you reply, staring at the waves.

“No,” he nods, “but I made you feel like it. And that’s worse.”

You nod once.

He stops walking, turning toward you. “Can I kiss you?”

You hesitate.

Then, wordlessly, you lean in and let him.

It's slow. It's familiar. Quiet in the way all the best things are. When it ends, you don’t step back.

Neither does he.

❀⊱┄┄┄┄⊰❀

You both get ready for bed in silence. There’s a soft kind of nervousness in the air now—not from anger, or tension, but something more dangerous: vulnerability.

He’s shirtless, toweling off his hair, and you’re already sitting on the edge of the bed, facing the wall.

You sit there like that for a while. Not stalling, just... thinking.

The mattress dips slightly as he sits beside you, “You okay?”

You nod.

More silence.

Then, quietly: “Thanks for coming.”

You sigh. “Thanks for paying for my eyebrows.”

He laughs, breath warm against your face. “They look amazing, by the way.”

“Shut up.”

“Still in love with me, huh?”

You roll your eyes and lay down, but you don’t deny it.

Not yet.

Not tonight.

You slipped under the covers, and he copied. You got comfortable on opposite sides of the same bed, something foreign thatfelt like it shouldn't happen.

Next to you, Han shifted uncontrollably. He tossed his covers off, shifted some more, and ended up going to the bathroom. He was gone for only a minute, pulling the covers over himself again.

Ten minutes later, he shifted some more. You couldn't sleep—not because of him, but because no one was there to hold while you drifted off. You glanced at the clock, 11:27pm.

You both lay there, afraid to wake each other up. You shifted, he shifted. He groaned into his pillow like he was having the worst night of his life.

Han breaks the silence with his smug attitude and smirk on his face. “I know you're up,” he sighs quietly.

“Yeah, and?” you sit up, him following. You flick on the light next to your bed, and the glow of your skin is beautiful enough to kill him.

"Well, ya'know, after all the stuff we did today, I think I deserve at least another kiss,"

"Han, go to bed,” you lay back down.

He scoots himself closer to you, arm wrapping around over your hips. You can feel his half hard on under his grey sweats. Your breath catches in your throat, and he laughs to himself.

"Listen,I can't deny it, Han. I did feel like a couple again today, but I just can't be with you right now. Your fan base is too extreme."

His lips meet your neck, kissing softly while you hum in response. "C'mon, pretty girl. I'm not asking you for a day, a week, or more. I'm asking for tonight. Be mine again tonight? please?" his hips bucking into yours, and you sigh against him.

He pulls away, pulling back the covers that lay over you. His right hand rubs your hips, his left toying with the bottom of your tank top. He lifts himself to the bottom of the bed, hands spreading your legs. He climbs up your body to your eyes, looking at you for a form of consent.

“please..”

he leans in, his lips meeting yours as his hands roam your body. His right hand tugs your shorts down while his left grabs at your waist.

He pulls away, breath heavy as he lifts your legs in the air to discard your shorts. The cold air hits your soaked panties and you gasp. His face meets your clothes core and he groans, “So fucking wet for me. I missed this so much.” He kisses your panties softly.

You whine out softly, hips pushing yourself closer.

He kisses down your left thigh, moaning into it like he hasn't done it in years. "Your fucking thighs baby—so pretty, so brown. missed seeing them bare, spread open so good for me.”

He takes his time, kissing up and down your thigh like it gave him pleasure—and it did, more than you had expected. He moves to the right, groaning into your skin and doing the same he did to the left.

He particularly takes a liking to your right thigh, kissing and biting and sucking. He licks a small space from your inner thigh to the top. His eyes darken and he licks his lips, "Tastes like that coco shea butter lotion you always use, so fucking delicious. missed having you like this—so so much baby,” he licks once more before shifting his attention to your cunt in his face.

He slips your panties to the side, tongue coming out to lick your clit. You gasp out, and your hips move on their own for friction.

He doesn't stop you, he leans into it more, licking, sucking, and sticking his tongue into you. You clench around nothing as he sucks your clit, gasps and moans coming from you above him.

“You're so wet f’me. I love it."

He doesn't ever stop. He inserts a finger into you, then another. Your moans fill the large space as he fingers you, his tongue glued to your clit.

He pulls away briefly,"So grateful for you, letting me have you like this. Brown skin shaking for me. fuckin’ love this color, gets me so horny,” and he's back, finger now rubbing your clit as he fucks you with his tongue.

You squirm and buck against his hand, whimpering as your moans become more high pitched. This doesn't go unnoticed, and he makes sure to keep the pace even.

His fingers find their way into you,"You gonna cum on my fingers? show me how good I ruin you without even using my dick?” he kisses and sucks your clit as you hit your high.

Your back arches, your vision goes white,you silently scream his name. He kisses up your body to your lips, and he kisses you, giving you a taste of yourself. The feeling felt like deja vu ( TXT ) —your boyfriend, technically ex, was kissing your body after giving you the most amazing head.

“Can you take me, baby?” he asks politely, dick pressing into your thigh desperately.

“Yes, please,” you sit up on your elbows, kissing him. He groans in your mouth, hands grabbing at your face lovingly. You catch a glimpse of the digital clock on the nightstand again, 12:43am.

Han's slipping your panties down, tugging his shorts off and his boxers. You watch him anxiously, waiting and silently wishing he would hurry up.

When he finally does get himself lined up, and starts pushing in at an annoyingly slow pace, you whine into his shoulder.”Han, please” You drag his name on your lips.

"Give me a second, baby. So much tighter than I remember. so pretty and perfect,” he grunts. Once he's fully in,he pauses to let you adjust, hands and lips roaming your body. when he starts moving, he groans softly into your neck.

"I'm gonna show you how sorry I am. Show you how much I missed you, and how bad I fucked up.” He softly presses kisses all over your face. He pulls out enough just so the tip is right at your entrance, and slowly pushes back in.

"I love you, y/n. I love you so much and I was an idiot to make you feel anything but happy around me. Forgive me? please?” He kisses into the crook of your neck, raising his head as he pushes in agonizingly slow.

“I forgive you, Han. Just make me forget,” you press your lips to his. He hums in your mouth, lips never leaving yours, even as he spoke

“I wanna make love to you right now. I'm gonna marry you, let you have my last name and carry my baby,” his pace suddenly feels okay,and the slowness only makes the experience better.

“Fucking love you, please don't leave me—ever. Let me make it up to you every time like this," his thrusts sped up a bit, barely noticeable but the way you felt him deeper said it all.

he pulls out briefly, turning you on your stomach before pushing back inside. The angle is new—deeper, sexier, filther. All you do is moan louder.

"I love you like this, you look so good. Don't ever leave, okay?."

“never.”

he smiles, grunting low as his hand makes its way into your fresh braids. He tugs lightly, just how you like it. His definition of “making love” wasn't some sappy vanilla sex, filled with loving words. To him it was whatever made you happy and whatever made you cum. You don't really mind him pulling your fresh braids—you kind of enjoy it, and he knows you do.

"you love when I fuck you like this, pulling your hair so you can feel that sting." You nod your head as he slowly picks up speed.

He grabs your hair harder, causing a yelp as he pulls you up so your back is to his chest. His other hand lightly grabs your throat, turning your head so your lips meet his. you moan into his mouth, hand reaching back to tangle in his hair.

"I love these braids, baby, and I got to pay for them. It makes me feel good."

Each thrust bounces your body. Your moans get higher as you approach your climax, and you pulse around him.

You let go with his name on your lips, and your body collapses into the mattress, back arched and perfect for him. He doesn't stop, thrusts getting messier as he chases his high.

"close, baby."

"Inside, baby. please" you struggle out between breaths.

his breathing stops for a second, and the next he's spilling himself into your cunt, deep and utterly full. His breathing is erratic as he slowly recovers. You feel a finger against your back, his hands faintly move across the arch of your spine, smiling to himself.

You rolled onto your back, out of breath and tired.

“Sorry, love. Let me get a towel,” he skipped over to the bathroom with a huge smile. He cleans you up and you both drift off to sleep, bodies close and wrapped up in each other.

❀⊱┄┄┄┄⊰❀

You try to enjoy the rest of your trip, not talking about what happened that night or what it meant. Nothing else happened on the trip, but the tension definitely was still thick. You didn't think either one of you would bring it up—that is until the flight back to Seoul. you had the same private flight, the same bed.

Han speaks up first,”So the sex? What does that mean? we can't just pretend it didn't happen,” he says once he's sure no one will hear him.

“I don't know, ji. I just didn't feel seen in our relationship, and I don't know if I can deal with my personal insecurities.”

He takes your hand. His eyes met yours, full of the love he'd always had for you. “I want to change for you, I really do. I'll be better for you. I'll notice when something is wrong, when you're not in the mood, and I won't push it—any of it. And I won't push you away. trust me.”

You pull your hand back, and use it to cup his cheek. Your voice comes out steady, “I want to believe that—so so bad, so make me believe that. please.”

He leans into you, briefly connecting your lips. You guys cuddle the rest of the flight.

When you land, he buys you a coffee, carries your luggage and packs it into the Uber for you. Once at your apartment, he helps you get your luggage inside, and offers his company for a few hours— which was ruined by Chan needing him to practice. He leaves you with a hug, not too flirty—but the kind that makes you wonder if he's worth all of it. He still hadn't asked you to be his girlfriend again, and it gave you relief. You weren't rushing a relationship again, and took the pace that felt right.

Eventually you warm up, the guys start to tease about a "comeback" between you two happening. You both insist on taking things slow instead of rushing to fix what's broken. Jisung looks happier—less stressed,and he feels that way too, everyone can tell. You two didn't just start over, you accepted your past, accepted your flaws, and changed them. Because when you really want to be with someone, a bad habit can be gone twice as fast.

A/N: if you made it this far and you enjoyed please like comment and repost🙏🏾🙏🏾. love you guys

[secondarysefikura]

Okay, so we all know that Sephiroth is all about being manipulative towards Cloud with their shared mental bond but in all honesty, I think Seph would much prefer it if Cloud submitted willingly. That way, it would feel all the more sweeter and come with a definite sense of accomplishment. Since Cloud is always playing hard to get and that requires Sephiroth to be more aggressive if he is to fulfill his desires, the latter is never truly satisfied. But it’s hard for Seph to relearn the boundaries he had before Nibelheim, making the dilemma even more complicated for him.

He wants Cloud to love him naturally.

He knows all too well what it is like to be held forcibly. He knows the misery of only being treated like an object. He knows that pursuing Cloud this way hurts Cloud.

He wants Cloud to love him naturally, but Cloud refuses. So Sephiroth has no choice but to be aggressive about it.

He thinks that if this was the past, he would be disgusted with himself for his actions. If someone rejected his advances, he thinks he would have accepted it. He remembers, vaguely, that he spent years learning boundaries; both his own and other peoples. It's wrong to pursue someone who is made so miserable by your presence.

He wants Cloud to love him naturally, but even if he doesn't, he needs Cloud. He hopes Cloud will one day truly love him.

Cloud yells at him when they spend time together. He shouts until he loses his voice, and he cries and hits and kicks until his face is red and his nails are bloody from scratching. He says mean things, about how he will never love Sephiroth.

He needs Cloud to love him, even if it's unnatural. He just wants Cloud to love him naturally, if he can make it that way.

He rolls his will over Cloud to soothe him. A part of him knows that this is terribly cruel, but he likes to think that Cloud is happier this way. He tucks Cloud's away in a pleasant corner of his mind and scrambles his thoughts to the wind. He pulls forward the love Cloud feels for others and connects it to him.

It's not an entirely unnatural way for Cloud to love him.

I'll let you out soon, Sephiroth promises, when you'll love me naturally. But right now things aren't so bad, are they? You're happy in there, right?

Cloud smiles at him cluelessly. He has no idea what Sephiroth is talking about, nor does he care. He's innocent like this. He lays his head on Sephiroth's chest and gasps when Sephiroth kisses him. He seems young. Sometimes he calls Sephiroth Zack, though he never realizes that he has done this.

Sephiroth will not have sex with Cloud until he loves him naturally. He can't handle the thought of Cloud looking up at him with those innocent eyes and calling him Zack.

In his mind, Cloud screams and scratches and struggles. I don't love you at all, Cloud thinks.

"I love you." Cloud says aloud as they lay on the couch.

[nekoboydreams]

(Hi, I'm from Russia, and I have to use a translator. Sorry if there are any grammatical errors in the text.) My friends and I really like your game! We're looking forward to the second day, even though it won't be soon!

I have a question for you, and I know it's been asked before, but I'll ask it again. You don't have to answer if you don't want to. Would you like to use the support feature? I know you have a patreon account, and I would love to get a paid subscription, but since I am in Russia, I am facing sanctions. However, I would have no problem getting a paid subscription on Boosty.

Hello! Thank you! And thank you for sharing it with your friends!

I've only heard about Boosty a few times, but I can take a closer look at it sometime! Since I’m still new to all of this, I’m still learning about these support platforms haha. I really appreciate your interest in wanting to support me that way! Really, thank you so much!

[things-arent-what-they-seem66]

Adam blushed so hard: Oooh. That was a little scary when she called.

Lucifer: Scary good.~ Don't worry she won't suspect a thing.

Well she did fall for his lie and Adam would admit that it was exciting when they were fucking with her on the phone like that. It was nearly like doing it in front of her.

Adam melted when Lucifer leaned down and kissed him deeply again, they were soon going at it again and Adam swore this is what heaven felt like.

He was so blissed out he forgot all about Lilith.

-

In the morning Adam woke up in Lucifer's arms in his bed and fuck if he didn't look good first thing in the morning. They shared morning kisses and they had sex again.

Only this was slower and felt more intimate, they felt like boyfriends and Adam was living for it. They even showered together and by the time they were dressed Adam was so full of Lucifer's cum it was a good thing he was a man otherwise he would have probably gotten pregnant.

Not that he would have minded.....

Lucifer smiled as he made Adam and himself breakfast. This was the one day staff didn't come to the manor so no one would see them.

They were eating when Adam had to ask: Is...... Is this a one time thing?

Lucifer looked up: Do you want it to be?

Adam should say yes, a better person would have said yes but he said: No....

Lucifer smiled and grabbed his hand and squeezed it in a reassuring way: Then no. I really like you Adam, a lot.

Adam's face was on fire: I-I-I really like you too.

And from that day forward, they were in the throws of their affair.

✨️Maid in Hell✨️

@things-arent-what-they-seem66

Lucifer didn't like spending money, especially on bullshit things his wife tried to explain away. Well, "explain" was a stretch. She really just waves him off.

Lilith annoyed him on a daily basis, but fuck, he loved her. And besides, he went out of his way to make her miserable when he wanted. That's why he's sitting out in the garden, by the pool on his sun lounger, in nothing but his swim shorts.

With his red sunglasses on, he was able to spy on one of those bullshit purchases. A maid that Lilith was insistent on hiring. But, the ridiculous part was that she hired a man. But the MORE ridiculous part was that she still required him to wear the traditional maid outfit.

He watched the maid from his spot in the sun. The man was on the second floor, cleaning the windows in the sun room. Half of them were stained glass, but the maid was cleaning the normal glass, so Lucifer could see and watch everything.

Even to this day, he couldn't understand Lilith's reason to hire a male maid, something about him not being attracted to a man. What flawed logic, seeing as he was pansexual; something his daughter told him about. But he won't question his wife, he doesn't feel like arguing for days about this.

So, for now, Lucifer will enjoy watching Lilith's bullshit purchase. Even in that dress, Lucifer could see the way his body shook when he cleaned, or how long his legs were, especially in those heels.

The blonde rubbed his upper thigh as the maid turned away, reaching over to another window, showing Lucifer the round of his ass. He knew it wasn't on purpose. He seemed to be the only employee Lilith hired that actually did their job properly.

Lucifer: Fuck...~. Should probably introduce myself, hm~.

[davidzochi]

getting to the part of the sketches when i started to dress up bill in everything i could think of

[tamorii]

Last year I documented a month of my life as I set my first steps towards getting an autism diagnosis at the age of 28. I drew one page every day for 30 days and turned it into a comic style zine! Since life is unpredictable, this zine is a rollercoaster from start to finish... but it was also very, very therapeutic and in a sense even healing for me to draw :')

"Inside the mind of an undiagnosed-but-pretty-sure adult" is currently available as a physical zine or digital download in my Shopify store! You can check it out here if you're interested :)

[elitadream]

Guys I wanna apologize in advance for my next piece. I did promise you more Mareach art a few days ago, and that's precisely what this is gonna be; but I have to warn you that it's very dumb and very self-indulgent. 😂

Hadn't made anything humorous in a while, so I felt prompted to get back to it for a quick post! x3 🤭

[rashoumon-homo]

Taglist Roll Call

This is just a list of everyone currently on the taglist (also works as a way for me to make sure the tagging works properly for new people who join).

Your settings will always be private-- this list is just to keep track of you all :)

If you want to join, leave, update settings, or submit a change of username, here's the form for that!

And without further ado, here's my lovely taglist:

@little-miss-chaoss @kimisbunny @crowscadence @weirdoisweird @waterkittywriting @fyodorssimp1 @sakui1 @flxtter523 @gtfoqueen

[xxplastic-cubexx]

Back to your blog to look at your wonderful lofe-giving art

Charles looks so cute with the blush on and so sexy with the bdsm and crop top on ajfkakfk awoooga bark bark bark, drooling, looking very disrespectfully, staring, daydreaming, licking my screen afjkakkk

Also following that Charles bdsm and crop top combo (already very deadly) with hot fox haired magneto (ahckskfk deceased)

welcome back to the blog to ogle anon, lovely to have you 😌 !!! thank you for enjoying my bdsm charles art... i do love drawin blush i aint gonna lie ... i dont advise lickin the screen tho ... but everything else is encouraged 😌

the silver fox that erik is IS pretty deadly this is true... and that beyond his ability to fold anyone like an omelette .... thank you my friend ..

[captainkurosolaire]

Still much left t' give, And abundance ov' wealth fer a dastardly plunder.