#I like to think he's just super uncomfortable with talking to Angel in any capacity
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Character sheet 2 of 3
I redid it so it looks wayyy better, and I gave him a different jacket. Mostly because I didn't think the shapes of his and Vaughn's sleeves needed to be so similar.
#my art#borderlands#borderlands / silent hill#timothy lawrence#hes sooo cute now idc#i fixed him.....#pre jack timothy... (cutie patootie)#im so happy i redid this so soon actually.#Original Timothy not being legally dead is so very important to me Hes Still out there but because he's missing he's assumed dead.#I say he refuses to elaborate here but I wanna clarify that He's refusing to tell Angel specifically what happened with him#I like to think he's just super uncomfortable with talking to Angel in any capacity#Angel knows about the fact that he's (maybe) Jack's missing body double#She had to listen to Jack talk about it for those months before she went out to Silent Hill.
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Cute + Awkward Headcanons (SFW/NSFW)
Trying to turn a bad day around, so I thought of these
Lucifer
Sometimes you canât tell if heâs giving you bedroom eyes or if heâs actually angry. Lucifer has spent THOUSANDS of years glaring at his brothers and doesnât know if heâs just staring or glaring
I think heâs super out of practice with romance so heâs hella awkward but when he gets that first positive sign that youâre into him, the charm and pride wakes up and suddenly heâs smooth AF
Flirts so formally he misses his shot 8/10 times
Has a habit of trying to police you like one of his brothers and itâs a knee-jerk, 1000+ year reaction to looking after 6 man-children of various difficulties. Always owns up and apologizes
Has accidentally almost made you pass out from kissing too long. Forgets you donât have the same lung capacity
BRUISES YOU TO HELL! FORGETS SO MUCH! FEELS SO BAD!
Thatâs why he has the gloves, to soften his grip because he was one of the strongest in the Celestial Realm and that translates to power in the Devildom
Only complains to you about his back pain from long nights burning the candle at both ends. You find it cute and sad at the same time
Is probably physically very heavy given his stature and the weight of his wings, so if he falls asleep on you, youâre trapped
Rare midnight snack dates when he MUST finish papers by the deadline.
You may or may not have had a Demonus date in his study when a particularly bad batch of paperwork was finally done
Youâve probably cracked at least one (1) antique wood chair
Quickly learned he CANNOT spank you because that shit seriously bruised your ass. You either need a strengthening charm or he has to re-learn how to use his strength around people
That caused one awkward visit to the infirmary because you didnât know if you were just sore, pinched, dislocated, or cracked. Turns out you were fine. There was no mistaking that hand print, though
It was the second time heâd apologized so profusely in his life. There was no pride left in this man.
You had a special cushion to ease the pain and it looked top of the line (hella fancy. Could probably resell it as fake Gucci in the human world.)
Lucifer gives me big dom vibes and orgasm denial/over-stimulation kink because of his pride basically demanding you beg for him. You passed out at least once from over-stimulation.
When you first start dating he wouldnât want to own up to any awkward boners so if you sit in his lap while heâs taking a paper break, heâll make every excuse under the sun (âThatâs my belt,â, etc.)
Mammon
This boy is nothing but awkward moments, are you kidding me?
Itâs a lot of âopen mouth, insert footâ because he canât be upfront with his feelings. Itâs partly not wanting to lose any âcredâ he has with people, but also because heâs embarrassed and canât be honest
Thereâs lots of tracking you down to sort out things you might have overheard (that he didnât honestly mean if they sounded bad)
Super sentimental about anything to do with you. You once kissed a piece of Grimm as a good luck charm for his exam and heâd kill someone over it. Always has it on him.
This lovable doofus just assumes youâre dating because youâre always together and youâre perfect and heâs your best man so whoâs better?!
When you actually ask him out (with something silly, like âI think us dating would be pretty cash moneyâ), heâs so confused. (âBut weâve been dating for, like, a month! Right, human?!â)
He talks big but heâs weak. Youâll always be able to fluster him
Wanted to make love to you on some Grimm and quickly realized that itâs uncomfortable. Porn lied to him and the ideaâs ruined. You guys cut the session short to find every piece of Grimm so you can actually lay in the bed
 Tends to plunk his head down on your chest and demand scratches/cuddles and has bruised you several times.
Accidentally fought you once or twice for his glasses while half asleep. Levi, Asmo, and Satan used to take them and hide from him
You learned heâs actually hella blind (contacts with non-prescription sunglasses or prescription yellow glasses) and have walked him around the House of Lamentation several times when his glasses went missing
Heâll complain about his brothers having it out for him and getting back at him, but it turns out they just wanted to make an excuse for you guys to hold hands. Itâs like a date!
Made you hit your head on the headboard once when he was doing missionary style. Had to stop and check on you, then it got awkward. He cuddled and kissed you the whole time, though. Even got you an ice pack!
The type to flirt with you, try to lean on something, and take himself out on the way down
Youâve had a few of those cliche âtrip and fell on each otherâ moments
Has accidentally swung you into doors and walls trying to scoop you up and run/march out of a room
Levi
This boy is also super awkward
When youâre alone, heâs an absolute sucker for any kind of affection you can give. This boy will literally slither across the floor to make himself comfortable in your lap so he can game.
Pet his hair. He loves that.
Will also have to re-train himself on how to be with you in public. With him, itâs not making fun of a ânormieâ as much.
Not big on PDA but will definitely hold your hand. How ELSE are people going to know youâre together?!
You get cute matching shirts or jewelry with the âPlayer 1, Player 2âČ theme
Does a lot more snake-like things with his tongue. Especially when frustrated. Rub his jaw and chin to see it come out a little bit. Itâs like a happy floppy dog tongue, just not as long or wide.
Craves a soft, warm thing to sleep on. You will be his new bed.
The first time you had sex, he broke out his demon form because he looked at you and loved you. He knew heâd get jealous if anyone ever saw you.
Was a little clumsy but determined. Sank in and started going at it, but wanted to look down and watch. He got his horns stuck in your hair and had to stop.
Is #1 fan when youâre naked. (âUgh. Smother me.â) Boy canât stand it. He needs it.
Tries to dress a little nicer (even if itâs casual) when you guys go out on dates.
You pack little snack bags when he stands in line for midnight releases and GODDAMN heâs gonna marry you?!
If youâre napping together and someone comes to wake him up or needs you, he just glares at them from underneath you, tail swishing threateningly. No one takes his human, okay?!
He has over-the-ear headphones but I bet he carries earbuds and has probably done that âshare an earbudâ thing to hold you close and listen to music
Do you need to get up while heâs still sleeping? Untangle yourself and tuck your pillow in his arms. Heâll be fine. Bonus: you get to see the snuggling in action.
Between all the anime and centuries in the Devildom, heâs gotten used to using tails as another way of expression. They act subconsciously based on what the demonâs thinking. Heâs surprised both of you several times by accidentally wrapping you up in his tail because he doesnât want you to leave.
When he gets visibly uncomfortable in social situations, slip him something with your scent on it. Itâs comforting. If you make up an excuse to get him out of there (heâs your escort and all), heâs over the moon.
Satan
Had more awkward moments than heâs willing to admit, but heâs more open about them than Lucifer. Basically, if someone guesses it happened, he wonât deny it.
BOY HAS A BOWTIE KINK. PLAY WITH HIS. STEAL ONE AND WEAR IT!
Has probably tripped over books walking you through his room or rushing to answer the door (not that youâd know how happy it makes him).
Thereâs a 50-50 chance that heâll steal a glance and act like he didnât, hiding behind an upside down book or something
Has definitely dropped books on his head after charming them down from the shelf. Your voice just sucks all his concentration up. You get bonus points for checking on him because some of those books are HELLA HEAVY
Say the right thing during a quiet tea session and you might hear him choke
Has probably been outed by one of his friends. Satan always seems to make friends without trying and gets invited to tons of stuff. What didnât seem like a date turns out to DEFINITELY be a date (according to the friend).
Plan some silly treasure hunt/detective date and this guy is yours for life (especially if youâre the prize at the end).
Isnât the most upfront about the disdain for his demon form, or how he feels weird about not being a true angel (just an extension of Lucifer), so expect a lot of raw, near-tears conversations in his demon form.
Hold him, run your fingers along the inside of his wings and the tips of his horns and Satan hugs you like thereâs no tomorrow. Heâll cry, but he doesnât regret these tears because theyâre healing.
Weak for hand kisses. Smooch them hands.
Not super into PDA, but heâll do other things to show he cares like carry your books and make sure you know what the weatherâs like before you leave
Satan still hasnât lived down the time Lucifer and the others broke down his door because they smelled blood and thought heâd hurt you. Turns out you guys were having sex and he just bit too hard.
Wouldnât talk to any of them for a week. He swept you up on an impromptu hotel vacation and you continued to avoid everyone by shopping and eating at cafes.
The type to hold your panties hostage or like a trophy. Gives them back eventually, and enjoys watching Mammon almost have an aneurysm as he tries to figure out why his room smells so strongly of you.
Tea dates, cat cafe dates, and plenty of couple pictures with cat filters. Satanâs Devilgram activity goes up substantially when heâs dating.
Youâre not his lock screen, but youâre his background.Â
Asmo
When you two start dating Asmo is literally the happiest demon in all of Devildom. Yeah heâs smug and cute like âhow could they NOT fall for beautiful me?â but boy is literally so stoked. All of that babbleâs just a cover for how sickeningly happy he is
Thinks the world of you.
Wants to spend all his free time with you, be it napping and cuddling, shopping, getting pampered, or just doing your nails.
Now that he has that real, true love he doesnât want to be without you.
You trend on Devilgram at least once
SO MANY PICTURES
Took you shopping for perfumes and has the tester strip you used to pick your perfume taped to his vanity. Then he can smell it whenever he likes!
Gives you a small thing of his cologne for when you get lonely or want to smell like him
Boy is super, super extra. Probably has matching shirts that say heâs yours and youâre his.
The type to get coupleâs pillows, cups, and pajamas. You also get coupleâs massages.
If you wear lipstick, heâs definitely made you a custom one at some exclusive-invite Devilgram event. He put your initials on the base of the tube and thinks itâs the cutest damn thing. His pride and joy--itâs basically a child.
Thereâs no shame in the bedroom with this one. I really doubt heâd have awkward moments because he has a lot of experience and has run into a lot of things that heâs handled one way or another. Itâs gentle coaching and some sweet teasing.
The most embarrassing thing heâs ever done is probably moaned/whined at the wrong time. Or said something semi-naughty at a bad time. Heâs not easily shamed so that doesnât really matter, either.
He melts at the gentlest touches and will be SO dramatic about it, like half fainted into his bed.
Is easily hypnotized by jewelry. Heâll massage your ears if you have earrings in, cooing over them and wanting to look at them. If heâs laying on you and youâre wearing a necklace, he plays with it the whole time.
Beel
Smart but distractable. Beelâs love language revolves around protection and food so pack him a lunch for practice or bring him something from a town date with one of the bros and heâs super excited
He means well but forgets his own strength so thereâs a lot that can go wrong in the bedroom
Has probably broken his bed several times
Had sex on the kitchen counter and the bros only found out because one of them was setting up dinner prep and one of the legs just gave out
Big, snuggly bear. Best hugs.
Hardest to wake up because he tends to sleep well and easily. Itâs a side effect of being connected to Belphie. Will hug you to him and keep snoring. You have to get someone else to wake him up because heâll just snuggle you the more you move around and talk
I headcanon that Beel does a tongue thing like Levi, mostly because his cardinal sin is gluttony and that helps get the food in his mouth faster. Itâs not as slender or serpentine as Leviâs, but it definitely moves.
Has licked you in his sleep as an affectionate thing.
Loves to snuggle into your hair when he sleeps.
Bite mark king. Heâs so affectionate and earnest when he makes love that he just ends up leaving all kinds of signs on you--mostly bite marks but when heâs conscious of leaving too many, they turn into hand prints.
Makes the purr sound when heâs inside of you. Purrs very easily.
Most of his awkward moments come from being oblivious. Heâs the kind of guy you have to out-and-out tell youâre flirting with him, that you like him and want to date him.
Beelâs also very shy with flirting. He thinks youâll just understand that heâs flirting when he shares food or wants to hug, or just anything. It can be missed because heâs generally chill and friendly.
Was royally embarrassed by Asmo (on accident) when he didnât eat as much at dinner one night and you were âtoo tiredâ to come down. Beel went to carry your food up and Asmo somehow found out heâd eaten you out right before. He was filled up on the human energy and you couldnât walk to come down.
If you ride his face, grab his horns to hold on. It does something for him and his hands go crazy and he really eats.
Scratch his back and heâll be your forever heater.
His PDA is carrying you because why not? Itâs a workout AND youâre close. It makes him give that big, nice smile.
Belphie
The biggest issue is that he falls asleep on you all the time. He doesnât mean to but heâs TIRED, okay?
Has a name for the cow pillow. Calls it âmy moo.â You are one of seven people that know that. Apparently itâs been a thing since he was little.
Has accidentally called you âmy mooâ when heâs sleep delirious. It means youâre highly thought of. Beel used to be his moo, too, and now heâs been replaced.
This sloth will smother you. Heâs like a koala that demands total contact to sleep
Gives you back rubs and massages. Sometimes he stays awake through them, sometimes you get sleepy and that makes him sleepy so he ends up falling asleep on your back.
Not big on PDA, but his version of caring for you is making sure youâre not bothered by annoying people. Wants you to sit with him at lunch though, and heâll sulk if you donât.
His favorite kind of dates are where you stockpile food and drink in the room and just feed each other while lounging in cozy blankets
If you make him any kind of pillow or blanket for a birthday, itâs at the top of his collection. Everyone will see it when they walk into his room.
Youâll plan dates in the star room where he just holds you and points out constellations until you fall asleep. Knows a lot of the mythology/stories behind them and shares that.
No matter the size, Belphie likes to cuddle between your boobs. He says itâs for your heartbeat and that theyâre comfy like pillows. His tail wags like crazy when he does this.
Also big on physical contact due to his time in the attic. You just have to be alone.
Brush and play with his hair. Thatâs what he likes most.
Just hold this boy, okay? He needs it.
If you guys are trying to nap and the other brothers are being noisy, heâll do the demon scream thing to tell them to shut the hell up. Heâs an absolute angel to you though. Youâre tired too, he knows.
If you get a little purple streak or something in your hair, heâs smitten.
Get him a kanigiri and the boy is super stoked. Heâll wear it all around the House of Lamentation. Bonus points if it has a hoodie or something he can throw up to annoy Lucifer.
Might get you a little stuffed cow toy so you have something to hug if you have to go away or canât be with him.
The type to be restless if he canât sleep with you. Will come to your room in the dead of night and ask to snuggle. Itâs the only time heâs nice about it (and vulnerable), so say yes.
You get to be a human body pillow. He loves it very much.
#Obey me!#Obey me x reader#Lucifer x Reader#Mammon x Reader#Leviathan x Reader#Levi x Reader#Satan x Reader#Asmodeus x reader#asmo x reader#beelzebub x reader#Beel x Reader#Belphegor x Reader
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#38 for the end of the year ask thing, please! Also, would you be cool with writing boyfriend headcanons for Daichi and Tendou? If not, thatâs totally fine lmao. Thank you in advance:) have a great day, I love your work!
Daichi and Tendou General Relationship Headcanons
So Iâm still working hard on those raffle winners things, but I need to take a break for a bit because Iâm a little burnt out right now. Iâve been not great like emotionally and Iâm not about to bother anyone with that so I gotta power through! Anyway, thank you for requesting and Iâm glad you like my stuff, I hope this was worth the wait lovie! â€ïž
Daichi
đŠ”đ»This fucking M A N, okay he is going to treat you so damn right.
đŠ”đ»Heâs a very respectful person first and foremost, so he always takes into account how you feel about things before he does anything.
đŠ”đ»Your comfort and happiness is his top priority, and he will do anything to maintain a smile on your face.
đŠ”đ»However, he himself kind of sucks at communicating and properly displaying his emotions to you. Heâs new to this whole relationship thing, and he might need a bit of hand holding.
đŠ”đ»Speaking offffff, heâs not like big into PDA. He isnât opposed to it, but he definitely isnât going to initiate it very often.
đŠ”đ»The most HE will do is hold your hand or give you forehead smooches, but heâll happily go along with anything you initiate as well.
đŠ”đ»Behind closed doors heâs a huge teddy bear, he loves to hold you and be held by you as much as humanly possible.
đŠ”đ»Heâs more of the type to show his affections through actions like getting your favorite food for you for lunch on some days, or lending you his jacket occasionally. Little things to show he cares.
đŠ”đ»He definitely is one of those guys who either has to have eyes on you or be touching you in some capacity out in public. It makes him feel secure to know he can see that youâre safe.
đŠ”đ»Heâs not a super jealous guy either, just extremely protective. Like you can hang out with any person you want, but the second they make advances on you/make you uncomfortable you know heâs going to be right there to step in if you need him.
đŠ”đ»You are not spared from his dadding either, actually, he tends to lecture you a lot more on things because heâs so concerned about you all the time.
đŠ”đ»He just wants you to be happy okayâŠ
đŠ”đ»He also can tend to overwork himself, so he isnât really one to talk all that much. Because of this, the two of you have designated âcouple rest daysâ where both of you just lie around and be useless all day.
đŠ”đ»His hands are very calloused and yet they are very sensitive!!! He likes it a lot when you give him little smooches on his hands!!! It makes him a very happy Daichi!!!
đŠ”đ»Dates with him a very simple, as he is a simple broke high schooler, let him be.
đŠ”đ»Most of them consist of the two of you grabbing something to eat at a cafe or shopping for something together.
đŠ”đ»Also, idc, yâall have cooking dates where you teach each other how to make things and 9/10 both of you end up covered in flour.
đŠ”đ»Like I said, he doesnât have a whole lot of money, but he does like to buy you something nice every once in a while. Maybe a new bracelet or a cute thing that reminded him of you.
đŠ”đ»Youâve got a lot of assorted gifts scattered across your shelves that heâs given you bc heâs precious and canât help but buy everything he thinks youâll like.
đŠ”đ»Heâs not super creative with nicknames, preferring to stick with babe or baby or a variation of you name.
đŠ”đ»All around heâs a big sweetie who wants to give you the world.
Tendou
đčThis RAT right here is the simultaneously the worst and the best boyfriend you could ever ask for.
đčFirst and foremost he is a tease, and he is relentless about it.
đčHe thinks youâre just too cute when youâre flustered, he just canât resist teasing you.
đčThough heâs the only one who can tease you the way he does, like sure other friends can poke fun at you, but heâs the only one who can tease you.
đčDespite his relentlessness on teasing, heâs super in tune to your emotions and knows when to back down and stop before it actually hurts you.
đčStill heâs not great at communicating his own emotions, but he puts in a huge effort in your relationship to be more open because he really cares even if heâs a little shit.
đčHeâs your little shit.
đčYou guessed it, guess monster here is a huge fan of PDA of any and all kinds â more specifically the kinds that annoy and inconvenience other people.
đčLike he will make out with you in the middle of shiratorizawaâs hallways and then smirk when he gets reprimanded by someone â probably semi or a teacher.
đčGives you his jersey before games and always give you looks during the game and is just all around obvious about you being with him.
đčPlease do that stereotypical launching yourself into his arms after he wins, heâll give you so much shit but he totally openly loves it too.
đčSO uh, heâs a pretty possessive guy, which stems from his insecurities about his looks and personality being a bit too wild for you.
đčHe knows you could do so much better, and his swears on his life he is not going to loose this chance he was given by whatever god is out there.
đčSo most of the time when youâre around him heâs got a hand on you or is all over you, and even when he isnât even near you heâs got something to show exactly who youâre dating.
đčHis jacket, a hoodie or shirt, something a little more permanent on your neck maybe??? Who knows, so long as it gets the job done.
đčLuckily for him most people are pretty put off by him and donât even attempt to flirt with you.
đčYou know how his fingies are all bandaged and stuff, he likes it when you wrap them up and give his finger tips kisses before games. It makes his feel invincible.
đčDates are a bit more extravagant with him, as he has more money to spend on you and having fun.
đčHis favorites are arcades where the two of you mess around and try to beat the high scores on any of the games, or amusement parks where he sees you let loose and have fun.
đčAlso, sidetone, heâs got a weird affinity for winning those rigged carnival games. You always go home with at least two giant stuffed animals he won for you.
đčHe doesnât actually get you gifts often, with most of the ones he does get you being candy or manga he wantâs you to/you want to read.
đčHis nicknames for you are just about anything he can think of, but his personal favorites are: angel, princess, sweet eternal goddess of his heart.
đčThe last one is said mostly in jest⊠mostly.
đčOverall heâs still a big goofball, but now he just kind of loves you a lot. So yeah.
A/N: It is 3am at time of my finishing this. Iâm in my feels, I want to get in contact with an old friend but I donât want to bother her. Also I really love Tendou so fucking much, and I just am all around loosing my damn mind. Hope yâall donât mind! Also, after doing a once over of this, why was I so infatuated with giving hands kissed?
#haikyuu x reader#x reader#hq#tendou x reader#satori x reader#tendou#satori#tendou satori#satori tendou#haikyuu#daichi x reader#sawamura x reader#daichi#sawamura#daichi sawamura#sawamura daichi#headcanons#haikyuu headcanons
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and the times keep turning
summary:Â
by the age of thirteen, ben learned to stop asking for things he wasnât going to get
until he met you
word count: 8k+
a/n: I figured Iâd just go for the full AU. Still a bit of canon angst but weâre in this for the fluff(ish)
Ben tells himself that he isnât staring (even with Klaus snickering to his right). But heâs too fixated to bring up a complaint. So he raises a hand, wrist still angry red and marked with a curse shining fresh, under the dull light of the dingy donut cafe in dismissal. It would be so easy to walk over. For once, heâs not crowded in the center of the booth and free to move independently. Naturally, he wonât though. Even when the universe is working against his decision. The restaurant feels less ventilated than it ever has. Even with the help of inconsistent opening and closing of the entry door. The air feels humid and hot, the overall discomfort of it all creeping under his clothing like an itch. He knows he looks ridiculous, jaw slack and accompanied by a wide look of wonderment. He certainly knows he feels like it, the tempo of his heart beating against his chest rattling his bones. Itâs so simple. Even when his conscious insists that itâs not. All because itâs you.Â
 Youâre with a friend. Just one. But he can tell youâre close from the way the two of you lean in together. Sharing laughter and smiles. If he had the capacity to feel any other emotion than infatuation, he might have felt envy. Not just because your friend was so near to you. But because of the obvious relationship the two of you shared. Friendship was still a foreign concept to all of them. Heâd like to have friends. Maybe one day. After you. Klaus is back again and Ben barely registers the weight of his arm on his shoulder. Yeah, he might look like a creep. But heâs been a freak all his life, whats one more title. Klaus is close. So close Ben vibrates as he pipes up in his ear. âSheâs cute.â And Ben wants to scoff. Argue. Come to your defense in anyway he can. Because youâre not just cute. Youâre beautiful. Amazing. Ethereal. (yes he knows what that means. He read about it once.) Everything he wants, even though he doesnât quite comprehend any of those words to their greatest extent. Though heâs certain youâd blow them all out of the water. âYou should talk to her.â Ben is happy that Klaus is adopting a softer tone for once. He doesnât need his theatrics drawing any attention to himself. âNo.â âWhy not?â âNo, Klaus.â âShe canât be worse than the monsters youâve seen.â It comes as a joke. But Klaus is so right. So so right. Ben is the monster. And monsters never get the princess in the happy ever after. âOh, does Benny have a crush?â Fiveâs voice is chased by a sharp jab to his side. With a little less training, Ben might have doubled over. He still might as the rest of his siblings chime in as they catch on. âWho is it?â âBen has a crush?â âThatâs so cute.â âFather would never approve.â Father would never approve of your love for Allison, Ben wants to quip back. But then he thinks, maybe he would? Being grandfather of super babies might even get the old man to smile. Diego managed to make it around the table before Ben could catch up with his movements, throwing an arm around his neck and dragging him out of his seat. The little restaurant is never very packed, so its easy to draw the attention of the room. For now heâs safe though. A booth of rambunctious thirteen year olds draws more shakes of the head than shows of concern. Ben thinks he sees your gaze dart over briefly. âBro âŠyou hav-â Diego slips up briefly but manages to carry though with determination. âGo. Donât be the last one waiting for your first kiss.â Ben blinks, before squinting at the challenge. As far as he knew, they were all of equal standing. âGuys, just stop. Please.â Itâs a futile attempt. They continue egging him on, somehow bringing even Vanya into the mix. They get louder until Ben finds himself pressured out of premature mortification than anything else. They send him off with a cheer and he deems them all assholes. You donât see him coming, but your friend does. They seem attentive in a way that Ben thinks they caught on a long time ago. Ben swallows thickly ready to embarrass himself and move on but they beat him to it. âArenât you from that academy ? Umbrella or something ?â Benâs first instinct is to shield his tattoo. A modern day taboo on a child his age. But heâs too late because now youâve seen it too now. Twisting in your seat, he finally sees more than a glimpse. In actuality, youâre not perfect. Up close youâre human. There is no celestial light or singling angels. But you do have an adorable button nose and dimples poking at your cheeks. You smile. And he mirrors it with a level of ease heâs never attempted. âHey, dude- did you hear me?â He does. But now youâre opening your mouth to speak and he could care less about anyone else. Your voice is an addictive timber as your eyes dart down to inspect his covered wrist. Recognition ages slowly on your features as you come to terms with everything. âYou all were at that fire a few weeks ago.â Ben remembers it. Much more vividly because he had little to do with that day and heâs glad itâs your first recollection. You donât remember him as the monster who easily tore men to shreds. You probably barely recalled his presence but thatâs okay. It was a fresher start than he was expecting. âUh, yeah sometimes we save people?â It sounds cheesy but you laugh and suddenly he understands the meaning of butterflies. You thank him even though you were no where in the vicinity and knew no one from the tragedy. He accepts your invitation to sit even when you both know he didnât come alone. But he doesnât care. You ask questions. A lot of them actually but theyâre good ones. You ask about his favorite color. If he has any pets. What he thinks about 7th grade math. Later, you walk away knowing more than heâs told anyone ever. But he knows your name. And a chance to see you again. And he feels like the winner.Â
It had taken three tries to successfully meet up for a proper meet up (a date). That fateful night had been a casual occurrence for the Umbrella Academy, but for you and your friend it had been a stretch on your own curfew.
At the age of thirteen, Ben was still very much under the thumb of his father. But as he later learned with Klausâ help, it was much easier to sneak out as an individual rather than a group.Â
What it really came down to were the missions.
For a moment, Ben was actually worried that his father had caught on. The alarm always seemed to go off just before he was meant to meet with you.
But tonight was different. Heâd managed to make it onto the street without a problem.
When he found you were equally as nervous, toeing unsurely outside of the little cafe. Benâs apprehension was slightly more geared to the tall individual looming just a few feet short of you, obviously taking him in all his entirety.
With a laugh you introduced the third wheel as your cousin, a necessary excuse to let you out alone. With a staged whisper, youâd promised him that he would keep his distance.
And he did, but his gaze apparently wasnât part of the deal.
Ben squirmed uncomfortably while trying to down his milkshake without choking. He was happy to be sat by the window, relying on the distraction of passerbys at each polite opportunity. Sometimes impolite when necessary.
âSo-um, you look pretty.â He felt silly mentioning now, more than twenty minutes into your outing but heâd been too scared to chance it with an additional set of ears. To think heâd taken down men twice his size and still managing to be intimidated.
Your head bowed, cheeks heating at the compliment. It was a subtle warmth, just barely adding color to your skin. But your gron was the real winner.
Shyly you poke at your straw, coaxing it into a slow circle. âYou do too,â you add with a bit more confidence. âItâs different, seeing you out of your uniform.
He was less recognizable too. With his sleeves pulled taught to his wrists, he was just like any other kid on the street. Something he rarely got to experience, especially away from his siblings.
Benâs returning smile is more reserved with a half shrug,â We donât always have to wear it.â
âAre you really a superhero?â
His lips pull taut, and unrecognizable look on his face as he considered your question. Was he a hero?
Luther fit the look of a hero. Even Diego accepting the title with his own flair. Allison and Five had their own style but he-
It didnât matter the mission.
No particular scenario.
Somehow he was always doused in blood.
His own cape.
Sometimes it felt more like the cloak of a villain.
He jumps at the touch of your hand, finding your gaze teetering between comfort and apologetic.
âI didnât mean to make you uncomfortable.â
Ben thinks youâll pull away. Leave it at that. But your hand stays, your fingers tapping a distracting staccato on his knuckles that he found himself craving. By focusing on it he managed to chase away the self depreciating thoughts.
âMy mom always says everyone a hero as long as you make a positive change. And from what I can see you guys are helping a lot of people.â
Itâs not enough, but itâs something to hold on to.
Ben canât remember the last time he felt something reach out that wasnât from within.
Itâs three months after your first kiss that Five goes missing.Â
He doesnât tell you at first because he thinks his brother will come back. They all do. Because itâs Five.Â
Reckless but reliable. Heâs the smartest of them all, so of course he can find his way back to them. Youâd only had the short pleasure of meeting him from odd occasions and late night donut excursions. So you believed it too. But a month goes by and Benâs breaking. Nothing is getting better. His father doesnât stop sending them on missions. So he cracks a little more. More people die. Most by his tact and phantom limbs. Thereâs blood and gore. And he finally shatters.
âHow do you do it ?â
When you arenât tempted by sticky donuts or overcrowded booths, the two of you sneak away to your peaceful oasis. Youâre fifteen now with a little more freedom.
Autumn is your favorite time to visit the overlook. The whispers of winter creating a nice enough breeze to accompany the glittering lights of the city below.
Youâre leaning back on your hands, your legs casually slung over your boyfriendâs lap.
Ben had been quiet when youâd brought up the question. But in truth heâd been wordless for weeks leading up to now. His touch was less too, as if he thought the briefest affection would scorch your essence.
For longer than youâd like, you had rolled with the change. Unable to do anything but allow the gap to get wider as you bid your time just trying to understand.
Klaus had been tight lipped about the subject, but it turned out that you didnât need words for an explanation. You could see the haunting look in his eyes.
It was the first time you began to wonder, had Superman ever broken down?
Benâs little finger twitches against your own it he doesnât follow the urge. His gaze strays for a second,â Do what?â
No playful guess, or ticklish prodding. Just a dry response.
You try to fill the void, offering a timid smile that trembles. This was a deep dive for your relationship and he was so far under.
What happened if you couldnât make it back to the surface?
Your hand clenched around the ground before extending, gaining just enough to brush his fingertips. He hesitates but doesnât pull away yet.
âDo all the stuff you do ?â Biting the inside of your cheek, you feed off the pain to root your resolve. âYouâve been doing this so long but ⊠Ben- does it hurt being a superhero?â
âYeah, it hurts.â It starts off slow. A few pebbles sprinkling from above.
You donât expect him to answer. To hear his voice crumble, rocks sliding together in a downpour of emotion.
âWere not invincible- except maybe Luther. But it doesnât fucking matter because weâre kids. He forgets that weâre children who didnât ask for this.â
Your hand hovers at his back, trying to find the right time to intervene with comfort.
âBut he bought us fair and square so I guess itâs his choice, right ?â
Your legs slid against his as you decide instead to give him space. The stout pillar of sadness was degrading into a pile of salt.
But he catches you by the waist before you can move, your gasp heating his cheek as he drags you closer. This time your legs part to let him in, arms confident as the looped around his neck.
This is the closest youâve been in weeks and it feels so good.
âNo, Ben, itâs not okay. â
But youâre only fifteen and with all the power between you, you canât change anything.
Youâre brushing just above the waters of seventeen and not much is better. But you understand Ben more. Think youâre more equipped to help. It never escaped you that he may be touch starved. Such a tender gift that weighed heavily with social implications. But you wanted to give it to him. Because you loved him. And most importantly wanted to believe he loved you back. It was reckless but your parents were out and honestly you could give a damn about the rest. The kisses were too hot, the touchâs only providing more sparks to the flame. Ben moved the two of you from the doorway, to the wall until the back of your knees bucked against your bed. You were more focused on getting as many layers off as you could during the travel time. Swallow his little moans of protest when your actions blocked a kiss or the tangle of clothing halted his hands. But nor here you were at the meeting point, both goals accomplished in full. Lips swollen, bodies stripped to the bare necessities and flushed in anticipation. Biting your cheek, you reached out to map out the plane of his abs. Dressed comfortably in hoodies and loose clothing, Ben made it hard for you to remember that you were dating a superhero. A boy being cultivated into a man with vigorous training. Gripping the single strand of boldness between the both you, Ben took your free hand, drawing it loser in exploration as his lips attached your neck. The two of you shared a mixed groan of appreciation: you at the suction against your throat and him moshing at the tentive palming of his bulge. The two of you werenât strangers to the taste of pleasure. Buye this would be the first time that you forgo the limited trials and accepted the full package. The spontaneously of it all had been tainted by a bit of planning , necessary actions for privacy. But now it was finally here. The boy youâd fallen in love with at the age of thirteen, settled firmly if not a little anxiously between your legs. His hands ran along the length of them carefully as he voiced his concerns,â Are you sure about this?â You captured his wavering hands, threading your fingers together. You were both bound to be nervous. It was a first for you each. But not the first taste of fresh experiences for either. Youâd been each otherâs first kiss. First date. First significant other. First love. And now- Nor you were never more sure of anything in your life. âAs long as itâs with you. I can face everything with you at my side. â His lips quirk in that soft little smile and you knew the worst of his worries were settled. Letting him go, you brought him back into a kiss, encouraging him to lead at his own pace. You swallowed the urge to flinch at the first touch of his fingers curling under the band of your panties not wanting to reignite any anxiousness. Instead you encourage with a roll of your hips, expressing your consent. Itâs not the first time heâs touched you there and the confidence is present, if not weighted down slightly from the added implications. But it felt food, and you made sure to let him know as much. Your lips quirk when the tips of his ears redder in response to your breathy call of his name. Moaning came easy when his string fingers dipped into you, his thumb not idle as it stroked you. âHm, condom?â You remember thoughtfully, not too far gone to forgot common sense. Youâre thankful when his fingers remain in you as he reaches over your head. From the new angle you award yourself with a kiss, humming and grinding down on his fingers. Youâre no expert on whatâs wet enough but you think you know your body enough to want to try. Rolling your eyes, you snatch the square before your boyfriend could attempt to free the rubber with his teeth. The last thing either of you needed was a tear. A soft gasp left you when his hand left you without warning, needing both hand to free himself of his boxers. When the condom was freed without injury you did the same to yourself, completely bare to one another for the first time. âSo weâre really doing this?â With a deep breath you confirmed shyly,â Yeah. â Getting the confirm on properly was a little awk arc and way too many hands were used. There were a few giggles here and there and ticklish touches to guide them. Timid glances. Accelerated heartbeats. One more deep breath. And a push. Your thighs quaked against your bodies internal battle to abort. It stung a bit but it wasnât as bad as your friends made it out to be. Ben was Attentive as always, delivering wet kisses until you gave him the okay. Your nails bit into the meat of his arm but he never complained. When you looked up, his eyelids were wrinkled from the pressure of holding them together. Your grip loosened to a caresses as you checked in, âBen? Are you okay?â One eye blinked open, his face a mix of s grimace and pure bliss,â This is going to sound really cliche but youâre sososo tight and I think Iâm going to come.â You laughed, genuinely laughed at his âpainâ, head thrown back in the act. Yeah, you two were going to be okay.Â
High school isnât a breeze but it gusts by like August wind. All too soon youâre ordering your cape and gown and wondering about college. Like everyone else youâre unsure, a little scared but somehow excited all at the same time. Ben is leaned in close, resting his head on your shoulder while you scroll through your emails. Thereâs nothing new there. Hasnât been for the last half hour but you refresh every few seconds just in case. Itâs the unofficial acceptance day and most of your friends know where theyâre going, except you. Ben strokes your arm from your bicep to your elbow, dry lips scratching the underside of your jaw as he leaves a short kiss,â They havenât forgotten about you,â he assures. You know they havenât. Because they can just as easily reject you. But Ben, the ever consistent and loving boyfriend, is determined to distract you properly. His limber fingers plunk your phone away from you even as you complain. âI didnât buy you a milkshake just to watch it melt. Iâll keep an eye on the mail.â Youâre too weak to challenge him, especially when heâs kissing you in reassurance. So you huff and purse your lips fro the straw. Ben was right. Itâs good and it brings you a little comfort. That and the way his hands absentmindedly play with your hair. As promised, from the corner of your eye you spot his thumb dragging across the screen of your phone every few minutes. Youâre halfway down the strawberry bliss when he speaks. But itâs not with news. âYouâre great whatever college you get into. You know that right?â You do, but thatâs not the reason for your stress. It just so happened that the school of your choice came about to be one of the highest ranked in academics. But you werenât chasing the prestige. You just wanted to stay. Rooted in the same city that brought you into the same life you couldnât see yourself without. It just helped that schools status made your parents proud. They could look past you remaining for the sake of your boyfriend when they knew you were in a top tier university. But it was all riding on you getting in this one. Because your second choice was hundreds of miles away. Ben of course reassured you that the relationship would be fine. He never wanted anyone other than the girl he met at thirteen. It was sweet but the world was sour. And he had a dangerous life. Nothing was certain. And everything- Benâs thumb stops. And you close your eyes knowing heâs hovering over the first unopened email you had in days. For a moment itâs quiet and then heâs kissing you. Itâs a very Ben kiss. Slow encompassing. One he used to give and seek comfort. And it leaves you wanting to cry. âBaby..â Youâd planned meticulously for your life to fold one way. Preferably around the two of you, shrouding each other from the rest of the world. His hands cup your cheek and you know heâs urging you to open them. But you canât. âBaby, you got in. â
The soft click of your front door turning puts you on edge. Your hand tightening around the feeble defense of a wooden spoon. Edging against the shadows of the wall, you refrain from the urge to call out- because honestly, who the fuck does that? Youâre perched, ready to strike- When Ben rounds the corner catching on to your intentions with a delayed widen of his eyes. âReally? A spoon. â With a huff, you clamber off the stool a little put off that your boyfriend wasnât nearly as confident in your skills as you were. You couldnât all be super powered. âYou could have at least texted asshole.â Since youâd reached the age of independence, you traded the comfort of your parents home for the benefit of living a bit closer to the university you were attending. At first theyâd been worried, especially at the prospect of you living alone. You didnât think assuring them that a superhero often took up lodgings and you werenât in complete solitude. Of course they knew about Ben. But as far as the rest of the world knew, he was busy with the Umbrella academy. Except for the few times he wasnât, and sought solace in the little pocket of peace you provided for him. You didnât care when he showed up, granting him a key to emphasize your point. As long as he gave you a heads up. That was really the summation of your brief list of rules. The moment you got use to him just sliding in, was the moment the same went for anyone..
âSorry,â his mumble came dry and not too apologetic. The sixteen year old you might have been more understanding. Young and still fresh in the whirlwind of love. But at twenty-one, now you finally caught up in the adult world. You had classes to worry about, grades to maintain to hold on to your scholarship. An assistantships to help pay the bills. In a position where you have so much, youâd earned  the position to ask. You would have been more willing to curl into his request of comfort, ready to mutually accept and give what you needed most right now. But his curt response edged with unconquered aggression only sparked the flint of your smoking irritation. âIâm sorry, did the big bad Horror show get his tentacles twisted ?â Dark eyes flash and you know immediately thatâs youâre rousing a haggard beast. Too bad the comfort of knowing that same beast for some odd years belittled the warning. âIâm not in the mood tonight.â Bringing your hands to your hips, you show no signs of backing down. âNeither is the rest of the world- which surprise!- still manages to revolve with or without you.â His body shudders, or maybe itâs a quake? Either one brings flighty hands into a tight clench as he sways unhelpfully on his dark hoody. Another thing you werenât looking forward too. Ben had adopted the habit of tossing his clothing in with your loads without warning. Often mixing colors or ruining them with stains. Squinting, you couldnât make out any foreign material but it wouldnât surprise you to find some blood disguised in the dark lining. âNot yours though.â His time is sharp but also something else. âYour world would stop, because mine would too. â The fight was still there. You certainly had it in you to go quite a few rounds. Like a lot of things in your relationship. Fighting with Ben was easy. He wasnât just a compliant punching bag that took the jabs and rolled with them. In fact he was worse. Having triple the amount of siblings push sparing with him quite a few notches  above your weight class. Unfortunately a championship belt valued for little and in the end you both settled separately in misery until the threads tightened and sew the two of you back together again. The stitching wasnât always perfect but you were my ended and had something to look back on. So here you prepared yourself. Ready to swing through the motions and hopefully leave the one beaten but still standing. But Ben just stood there, nails digging into his palms. âCan we just-â âNot?â You finished helpfully, hopefully. Nodding quietly, Ben left you standing there to drag himself into one of the chairs of the island counter. His sleeves dragged against the counter to leaning- yep definitely needed to use a detergent for blood tonight. The lack of a fight somehow left you more exhausted than an actual one but you still managed to work through dinner. It was over a fork full of pasta that you considered your boyfriend with a critical eye. It always occurred to you why he didnât leave the estate. College had been a whim of an aspiration for him. But if he wanted to could he really? You were all still so young, barely reaching the height of adulthood. But you were managing so far. There was no reason why he couldnât as well. âHave you all though about moving out?â His fork freezes and you worry youâre about to ignite something. But his voice is quiet. âAnd go where ?â
For awhile it calms down. Your second year of college was a smooth transition into your third. And now you have a better idea of how you plan to mold your life. The July sun is searing reminder that summer is almost over. Something youâre both excited about and dreading. Youâd spent the last two months a few hundred miles away on an internship. Itâd been the furthest youâd ever been from home. And equally the longest youâd been from Ben. With a clink, your front door opens and your luggage slumped against the entrance of your apartment. The end of your trip wasnât your only relief. Coming back to see your apartment in one piece had been the greatest stress reliever. With another year still left under your belt, there had been no reason to let go of your lease. But with the internship, this was the first time you hadnât occupied your home. You considered renting it out, a suggestion from your father to gain a bit of revenue. But that required moving your things out, which frankly defeated the whole purpose. Besides. Why waste the effort when you had a house sitter on call? âGuys?â Kicking your bags out of the way, you let the door close behind you as you ventured further into the flat. It was quiet in a way that made you a bit anxious. Ben had known youâd be in time around this time. You parents had insisted on picking you up so you had him forgo the effort of meeting you at the airport. It made sense for him to wait here for you but it wouldnât surprise you to find him out with his family on some excursion. Or what was left of the team. From what heâd filled you in on, only Luther, Diego, Ben and Klaus were left. Allisonâs disappearance spoke for itself. Youâd come across more than a few promotional ads for her first role in an upcoming movie. It was shocking to say the least, to find out your childhood friend was on the cusp of a celebrity lifestyle. But as one of the Umbrella kids, you supposed they all were. With nothing but her academics, Vanya had been the first to move out to pursue. Very little was known about her personal progression. According to Ben, no one was concerned enough to pry. So in the revelation of the academy growing into their own shoes, it made sense for Klaus and Ben to enjoy a bit of freedom. One you were happy to give as long as it didnât come at the price of a lost security deposit. For some reason you were hesitant to turn on any light, thinking it might ruin some indiscernible setting. The setting sun was still high enough to provide you some light, the soft glow equal to the glimmer of the bulb above the stove. Yet it was somewhat unsettling to think that they were here. Surely they would have picked up on your presence by now. The training theyâd suffered through would have managed to hone their skills that much. The hunt of your small flat was short lived, coming short of your bedroom where your inconspicuous house guests lay scattered in your living room. Klaus managed to once again fit himself uncomfortably into the chair under the window. His head craned in a way that hinted heâd been chasing the sun until its descent. One of your throw bellow wedged under his arm instead of behind his back. You were almost urged to drape a blanket over him. But he was so quiet. You werenât referring to the light scores rumbling against her throat of course. But the lack of shifting, the absence of mutters and heartbreaking screams. In the wake of everything youâd known about Klaus was the perfect image of peace. âHey, sweetheart.â There was a shuffle of clothing as Ben rose from underneath the mounds of your knitted cover. Heâs yawning around a languid smile, drawing you near with a lazy beckon. Itâs the the welcome home youâve been waiting all day for. His laugh warms you, curling around your body as you straddle his waist and bring your arms around him. The kisses are light and noiselessly, intentionally formed so not go disturb the still slumbering occupant. Benâs lips brush your cheek as you take in the rare sight again. âHe looks so at peace,â you comment quietly. Ben hums in agreement and you shift to accommodate as he slouchâs back into the cushions. Helpfully, you gather the blankets back around you. âBeen like this all summer. â He kisses your raised brow and tucks you closer,â Iâll explain in the morning. But this was a good idea for both of us.â You fall asleep dreaming about what it would be like if everyday was like this.Â
Everyone has had enough, Ben tells you over the phone one day. Youâre at the library, fumbling quickly with your things at the first sound of distress. You managed to escape to the outskirts, hidden between the shelves as he spoke. The last mission was bad. Too close for comfort and the consensus was to get out once and far all. He shares his fears. None of them are really ready to face the world alone. Theyâve saved countless lives but itâs still not enough to conquer it. But Vanya managed, he scoffs, still agitated by it all. It became common knowledge by now that sheâd climbed to the top of the class of the local university. Providing a rather vivid and compelling dissertation into the life of her family.Â
Your offer comes easy. Maybe because youâve been wanting to asks for years. âWhy donât you live in with me?â His resigned sigh isnât exactly rejection. âWhat about Klaus ?â
Benâs eventual decision lined up with the end of your lease nicely. After three years of seeing the same walls, you were experiencing the newness of indulgent arches and patio gardens. Klaus managed to come up with quite a few demands, even apartment hunting with you and Ben. âNothing but the best for the most sickening sweet childhood sweethearts youâve ever seen.â Youâd wanted to interrupt him on more than one occasion but he just rolled into another tangent as you scouted out all imperfections and cried for justice. It had taken most of the week for the final decision to land on a quaint three bedroom townhouse downtown. Now you were six couches deep in the department store as you unsuccessfully corralled a disgruntled Klaus. You grimaced guiltily through a smile at the hovering employees expression their displeasure. Not that you blamed them. Klaus really taking the âtry it yourselfâ offer too far. Legs kicked up, swaddled in a blanket with one if the throw pillows under his arse- Because that was his money maker. Klaus was very much at home. Which would be great. If you were at home. Not in the center of IKEA on the verge of getting revoked for loitering. Scanning the store, you desperately tried to locate your boyfriend, uncertain of how you got out on babysitting duty two shops in a row. When no help was on the horizon you reluctantly settled into your role. ïżœïżœKlaus, honey..â You tried to start. âThis is the fifth couch youâve made your own. Itâs just lounge ware not your final resting place. â âYou see thatâs where youâre wrong my dear. â Your body sags in defeat as he rolls into another speech. Somehow managing to belittle a billion dollar industry built on home economics in the process. A touch on your shoulder comes as more relief than surprise when Ben appears next to you. He takes in your exasperated state with confusion and inclines his head back towards the rest of the store,âIâve been waiting by the beds. Why are we still looking at couches?â You gesture to his couch-ridden brother,âI think Klaus has an obsession. â Ben seemed to have given up on comprehending all together and reached for his brotherâs hands, dragging him to his feet. A quiet âthank godâ flitters behind you. âDude, you can pick out the couch too. But you really need to decide on a bed before the ones on sale sell out. I really donât want to fight a coupon obsessed mother. â A perplexed Klaus loses all his theatrics. Its in his confusion that the most clarity is found for you. Throughout the course of the weeks, youâd noticed little things, but youâd never expected this kind of miscommunication. You hadnât realize such a direct approach had been necessary. âYou want me to pick out your bed too? I didnât think youâd value my expertise so much. Itâs rather refreshing â You in Ben share a look. The tilt of his head cementing your conclusion. You say slowly â We already picked up ours. Remember the sleigh bed ?â âOh right. I take back my words. Shame one your distasteful cliche.â You resist the urge to scowl. You quite liked the woodwork if that choice. âWell good thing you get to choose your own,â Ben grumbles, equally as proud of the choice in the bed frame. He manages to get everyone on the walkway in route of the direction heâd come from. He takes on last look at Klausâ calculating face before he gives up.âOh for fucks sake Klaus. We want you to live with us.â âWhat?â Reacting to the softness in his voice, you reached around your boyfriend to twine your fingers,âWere just getting ahold of this adult thing. You thought weâd make you figure it out alone ?â Youâre happy when everyone decides to ignore the obvious wetness pooling in Klausâ eyes. The store had enough of a stage production and the last thing it needed were the three of you breaking down over the implications of growing up through childhood. Klaus thankfully just squeezes back in response, but there is an obvious crack in his voice.âYou really want to live with me after 17 years ?â âI figured she could to suffer an equal amount of the trials of living with you before we could call it even. â Laughing wetly, you pinch Benâs side playfully âYes, we want you to live with us.â âSo the apartment ads?â âYes, youâre getting your port side view because you asked for it. Not because we were just appeasing you. Itâs yours.â âI donât know what to sayâŠâ Ben perks up visibly as the three of you approach the more congested part of the store. He hadnât been kidding when heâd exaggerated about the chaos of selection. âCan we discuss it after you pick a bed on this sell?. â He was already trying to map about the best way to navigate through the masses. Frankly, you were already starting to miss the couches. And Klaus. Ben protested loudly when his brother ducked under his arm and pivoted in the opposite direction. Klaus barely managed to eade his grasp, snatching the waist length of us coat up like a victorian style dress. âOh this is all wrong. We need to start all over. Honey, that kitchen table with those drapes? Not in my house.â With a flounce he disappears down an adjacent pathway. The feeling that settles over you, under the thick fog of irritation floating around Ben, is eased content. With a comforting hand, you drag you palm over the tense muscle of Benâs back and counted to ten for him.Â
Twenty five feels like a prime accomplishment, but in truth youâre so far from truly encompassing the progression of an adult. But you are a college graduate and a proper contribution to the workforce. Both Ben and Klaus were well on their way to understanding too. It had taken some effort, but with Benâs help you managed to convince Klaus into seeking counsel. There would never truly be a point in his life that he would come to ignore the voices but perhaps channeling them would drive away the ache. At first, heâd been resistant of the idea of being diagnosed with âPTSDâ, a symptom that he didnât feel truly exemplified his ordeal. That was of course, all until a war ridden solider named Dave stumbled into a session. It was the first time Klaus had managed to manifest a spirit on pure will. Driven by the urge to comfort Dave with the news that his fallen brother wasnât tormenting him and had indeed passed on with no regrets or grudges. It was Dave who had recommended Klaus to the community center for a position as an official consoler, taking with his own breakthrough. Neither you or Ben had commented how it had been the quickest Klaus had agreed to anything that wasnât his own idea. Conveniently, Dave had also recommended a few good places for dinner.
âOh shit. â With a groggy groan you nuzzled unconsciously into Benâs chest. It was too early for you to properly comprehend the tone of his voice but your body still provided comfort under the guise of apprehension. Ben responded to you gratefully, long fingers tangling in your hair through small loops eventually pulled taut when reality finally settled. His lips flapped, opening and closing around the truth that felt so much like a lie. A mirage. But certainly it really couldnât happening- âDing dong the wizard  is dead. Which is quite frankly sad news for me but wooo!â The two of you flinched, jumping to attention at Klaus grand entrance. Ben, the more awake and informed, relaxing first as he shared a look of disbelief with his brother. If two people believed the same thing, it was closer to the truth right? Still trying to swallow around the news, Ben cleared his voice shakily,â Can you see him?â Klaus managed to clear the low hanging haze of sleep from the room when he pounced, bed shaking under his weight as he made himself at home in the sheets. Ben vaguely registered your groan of protest as you tried to secure the sheets around your modesty. The act was for naught however, as the two umbrella children were preoccupied by a more pressing matter. Rolling his eyes, Klaus lounged back against the foot of the bed, forgetting his own modesty as his bathrobe slid around his body to accommodate. With lazy excitement he twirled the strings,â As if Iâd willingly summon him. I just got him out of my life, Ben,â he scoffed, to which the others merely shrugged. It wasnât like Klaus gave out invitations to his phantom visitors. âCan someone get me up to speed?â You requested disgruntled, a little put off from being left out. You almost regretted asking. âDads dead.â The two answered with a mixture of excitement and barely aged disbelief. You were suspended between high fiving Klaus and stroking your boyfriendâs back out of comfort. You had your own thoughts about the man, some unjust and the others completely dignified. But in the same thought, he brought you these dysfunctional idiots and that was enough to pay your respects for. The underlying emotion, however, was relief. No denying that collective emotion. Thinking around Benâs persistent and absent minded tugs against your scalp, you tested the waters. âShould you guys be preparing funeral arrangements?â âOh! My inheritance!â With a squeal, a flutter of sheets and unmentionables you really shouldnât be use to seeing, Klaus was gone. You didnât expect much out of him anyway. Beside you, Benâs shuddered with a haggard sigh. He leaned gratefully into your palm as it roamed the plane of his back. Breathing more easily at the touch of your lips between his shoulder blades. He sought out your hand still lost in the wrinkled sheets, bringing it to his lips. âGuess should check in with the others?â Ben found it strange. The man they called âfatherâ put them through so much turmoil. Put him through so many horrors. And for what? Just to call himself king of the castle? They called him the monster. But Ben had experience enough to point out the real ones. But it was all over. Finally over And yet⊠âOh, Ben..â He blinked past the tears in disbelief, eyes shining as he curled into your offered embrace. He was still their dad.Â
âHey, Â I could buy my own mansion with this kind of money. You think Dave would like that?â You vaguely registered his words over the thick haze. Snuggled close to Ben, you were still trying to properly dissect what all had happened in the last twelve hours. The funeral had been a small affair, exclusively tightening around you as the sole outsider, purely by your longstanding devotion to Ben. It had been jaring at first. Seeing all the siblings in one place. Even Vanya in attendance. They were all living out their own lives, so close yet so far out of touch. For the most part, youâd been able to follow Allison on the tabloids. Vanya was a distinguished professor at the college of music, often having promotional concerts around the city. Diego was a little harder to keep track of, but Luther. Luther was about as impossible as a feat as still coming to terms with the fact that he lived on the moon. In all honesty, it had been the first time youâd set foot in the mansion. Ben had never wanted you to experience the drab lifestyle heâd grown up in. Beyond all the luxury and schematics, you were beginning to realize how many secrets the shadows held. It would have been a quiet event. Meant to be placed in the courtyard. The mismatched cohesiveness of it all was abruptly interrupted by the alert of an uninvited guest. Diego had rolled into action first, donning his mask with efficiency that made you question its origin. Ben had instructed you to stay behind him, and you stepped back the agreeable amount of feet should an occurrence like this ever arise. The echo of footsteps was slow and calculated. A confident gait that traveled with a sense of knowing. They grew closer, each one coiling the muscle of tension a thread tighter. Until a single man rounded the corner. One unfamiliar, yet so recognizable from the curl of his scowl. A disinterested Five, rolled his eyes at his less than seasoned battle ready family, clad in a button up and linen pants with a loose ringlet of tropical flowers around his neck. He took everyone in with vague disgust before rolling his eyes and tossing the petals aside, muttering audibly about getting the show on the road so that he could return to his estate.
â So weâre not going to talk about how our brother basically ran away from home and built his own starter company on a private island based on the exploits of time travel?â Klausâ exhale backfired at the end, the smoke rushed out with a sputter and accompanying coughs. Another time you might have shown more concern, but the shock still took heavily dosed in your body to process another emotion. Ben was equally as unconcerned, his chest pushing you briefly into a sitting position as he reached out to snatch the smoking roll of paper from Klausâ strangled grip. Eventually Klaus recovered, breathing shakily as he registered the theft. âNo, weâre not going to talk about the little imp.â A thick cloud of smoke curled around you as Ben spoke,â Not so little anymore.â âFucking family,â Klaus quipped. âI hope he got cut out of the will.â You responded to a light tug of your chin, turning into the gesture to welcome your boyfriendâs lips against your own. With a part of his lips, Ben emptied the second drag of weed into your mouth. You sink down further into his hold, hanging onto the hazy cloud before releasing it with a relieved sigh. It really was therapeutic in a way you couldnât quite comprehend or explore on your own. The feeling radiated with a pleasant warmth that curled your toes. You snatched it back before Klaus could, bringing it to your lips for a slow deep pull like youâd been instructed. Klaus meet your gaze with a twinkle of pride, happy to corrupt you even just a little bit. âWhen are the two of you going to get married so I can ask Dave?â It was your turn to choke on an inhale, to which Klaus grinned victoriously. Benâs hand massaged your back, patting firmly behind the lungs. It was careful and coherent, so unlike the visible shock you were feeling. âWhy do you have to wait for us?â Klaus rolled his eyes as he took the burning paper with a frown,â Itâs only out of courtesy. I donât have to. But since you bought the ring firstâŠâ âKlaus.â  Benâs voice was sharper and more aware. The conversation doing the the same to your consciousness. Turning in his hold, Ben only fought your attempts shortly before giving up. Both of your eyes were thinly laced but slowly gaining coherency. âYou bought a ring?â Ben mumbled around the touch of your fingers against his lips, nibbling unintentionally with each word. âI really donât want to bring this up high and on the evening of my fatherâs funeral.â âAnd brotherâs resurrection. Hallelujah!â Klaus added unhelpfully. But you were determined, hands gripping his chin this time as you kept his gaze on you. âYou want to marry me?â âYeah, baby. I want to marry you.â
Youâre twenty eight lying awake at 2 am on the day of your wedding. It wasnât a restless sleep and neither of you were recovering from a bout of passion.
It was serene.
Quiet.
Much like it had been since Klaus moved out a year ago. Him and Dave had managed to sign on a townhouse just a few lots over. The prompt and wholly unexpected sighting of ghosts encouraging a hasty move from the last occupants.
They were engaged now, well into their own plans.
Everyone was back in town.
Allison with shared custody of Claire. They were staying with Luther for the weekend.
Diego has promised to show up in a proper suit for once. Bow tie and all. A cute detective ( who he definitely was not dating )as his plus one.
And then there was Five and his mysterious wife Delores.
No one was even tempted to unpack that enigma.
You roll onto your side and ride to your elbows. Benâs eyes are closed but his breathing isnât deep enough for sleep. You test your hypothesis with a short kiss that he lengthens with a smile.
The arm resting under you, curls up around your waist,â Still not sleepy?â
You hum in response, âitâs helping me remember this isnât all a dream.â
Ben strokes your cheek with a laugh,â Weâve been living the dream for the last fifteen years.â
You weave your fingers together,â Fifteen huh?â
He buried his face into your neck and the two of you inhale together. There are less than six hours left before youâll be separated for the majority of the day. Allison had been firm on her schedule, looping your mother and other bridesmaids in without complaint.
Five planned to pay for everything. Whether it was out of apology or simply because he could mattered not to Ben who agreed without a blink.
âIt felt like a fantasy when I first saw you. Glad we never woke up.â
You go to kiss his nose and he turn in just the right way to capture your lips.Its a slow kiss, one to travel across the years and a few more for the future.
âI love you.â
After a decade of trials, the thirties certainly arenât smooth but its a better set of challenges. You learned a new part of Benâs heritage when your first pregnancy resulted in not one but two babies.
The two of you had been swept into a reasonable amount of panic. It was one thing for first-time parents to prepare for a single child, but twins?
Ben had been told to save his other hand for the second child during labor, he hadnât expect to nearly lose both in the same day. But heâd been your pillar through the whole ordeal, stroking the wet cloth across your forehead and murmuring encouragement over your explicitness.
He was really really glad you werenât Allison that day.
Thinking about it made him wonder what kind of hell erupted on Claireâs birth.
Raising twins wasnât impossible but it wasnât a walk either. More like a casual collection of jobs with a few stumbles along the way. In terms of proper parenting, there was a bit of a deficit between both of your experiences but there was a bold consensus to make up for misgivings on both sides.
Klaus turned out to be more of a help than either of you had expected. But then again, neither of you had anticipated Daveâs arrival into his life either. The two were well into their own marriage now and at the top of the uncle list.
You both watched them now, tucked under each other on the porch while your children drug their uncles through the snow. It was early enough for the snow to still be considered fresh and the coffee to be mildly ineffective. You watch the steam roll from your mouth, hissing on the inhale.
You decided to give the little group another five minutes before calling it in. It was all fun and games until you had a house full of sniffles and icky coughs. You were already thinking of whether to entice them with pancakes or french toast this morning.
âIf I wasnât so worried, Iâd leave them out here with them and go back inside,â Ben grumbled lowly behind you. Heâd returned back inside for a fresh cup of coffee.
You want to laugh but a yawn comes first,â Then weâd be taking care of four sick kids.â
âDaddy, come help me please!â
Ben tries to hide the smile, but that kind of grin is impossible to subdue. You know from experience. All fight leaves his body, and likely the rest of his warmth as he hands over his cup after one last long sip.
Youâre pleased to still see half left as you steal a few sips for yourself.
#the umbrella academy#the umbrella academy imagine#ben hargreeves imagine#ben hargreeves x reader#klaus hargreeves imagine#the umbrella academy headcanon#the umbrella academy writing#the umbrella academy oneshot
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Soul Mates * Chensper Oneshot
If youâve never watched Shadowhunters, I have some references to the end of the show. This is me hella projecting my Black girl issues on Char + my concerns about her character in the show too.Â
Charlotte hardly ever got a chance to catch up on the shows that she loved, and she was FINALLY finishing Shadowhunters. Sheâd initially taken a break whenever the outpour to have it renewed or picked up elsewhere led to nothing. It was ended, and she wanted to draw it out as long as she could. Now, she was at home, alone, catching up, with a matcha tea smoothie, a sheet mask on her face, and a plastic cap on her head for deep conditioning. Charlotteâs time⊠Until she heard the pebbles on the window. Henry!Â
She jumped up, forgetting the condition she was in and opened the window to look out. âWhoa!â He said, with a start. âCharlotte? Is that you underâŠâ He waved a hand to indicate her, âAll thatâŠ?â She gasped, but then realized, itâs just Henry.Â
âI hope this is an emergency, because itâs Charlotte Time, and Iâm watching Shadowhunters.â
Jasper appeared, running up as he said, âI love the SWEET Malec wedding in the end!â She groaned. She had purposefully avoided checking anything that might tell her anything this whole time.Â
âOpen up. Weâre cominâ in,â Henry said.
âOkay,â She groaned again and went to let them inside.Â
They were watching with her, commenting on things about the show, which Henry wasnât nearly as familiar with, but wanted to chill with his two best friends after a hard night of work that he didnât really want to talk about. They got to the end, despite Charlotte having to pause it a few times to take off her sheet mask and rinse her hair. She let the boys each braid half for her to set it for the night.Â
Whenever they got to the end, she was trying not to cry. âThat was beautiful,â Henry said. I almost wanna go watch the rest.â Charlotte scoffed. âYeah, youâre right, Iâm definitely not gonna commit to it.â She just shook her head, clearly flustered. âOr⊠I will? Whatâs wrong with you? Let me know something. You lookâŠâ He stared at her for a moment⊠âWell, you look beautiful, I mean, the mask thingy works wonders, but I mean, you look like you donât feel okay.â
She shook her head and said, âI just get tired of never seeing a full happy ending for the Black girl characters.â Jasper and Henry both shifted uncomfortably. Theyâd had discussions about this before and previously, realized that they apparently didnât know wtf they were talking about. They didnât like for the conversation to come up, but SHE didnât always like to see what she saw. âIt;s like on the one hand, her character gets to start fresh and be a leader, but we already know that being a packmaster is hard work and that sheâll be doing it alone, because of ALL the major characters in this show, the ONLY one that had to lose her love by the end was her. Everyone else is booed up, and happy together, even in the very end, we see that the two main characters will most likely get back to their love. But, her story ends in deciding how to best bring people into her restaurant. They literally took away her lover and put her in a service capacity as her happy ending. Why couldnât she have love too? Why canât we ever have love? Weâre always depicted as an odd numbered wheel, or the savior without a story, or the servant without a love. Sure, weâre strong and independent and donât need anybody, but itâd be nice to see it happen sometimes, especially in the end of a show. What would they have lost by letting her be happy WITH someone?â She got up and left the room.Â
Jasper and Henry looked at each other and began to play rock, paper, scissors to see who was gonna go check on her, but she came back quick, with a satin headwrap that she started tying on. âAnd like⊠if it happened every now and then, Iâd be fine right now. But, I invest years of my life to shows that donât care if my representation gets to have proper treatment. Then, I have to live in the real world, where Iâm ignored and unappreciated just as much. Iâm tired of it. Iâm not watching anything else. Iâm going on a fast from shows and stuff.â
âThe real world youâre ignored and unappreciated? We literally just braided your hair for you,â Jasper pointed out.
âYeah. You and your soul mate,â she rolled her eyes and sat on the bed. âMe and Hen used to be super close, and as soon as he had another friend in the Man Cave, I got placed on the backburner. However your stories eventually play out, I already know, IF Iâm in it, itâll be in the background, somewhere.â She shrugged her shoulders, âAnd I canât even escape into fantasy where I get to imagine that things arenât like that, because even if there are fairies, vampires and werewolves⊠Black girls still need to know their place in that probably happy, but not like the others level.â She felt that weird feeling again, like she might cry. It passed. She wasnât a huge cryer, ad certainly wasnât trying to do so in front of the boys.
âYou feel left out???â Henry asked, shocked. He wrapped an arm around her and pulled her in. âThatâs⊠I donât know what to say. I donât feel like youâre ever left out. I think about things all the time from a very Charlotte standpoint. I still do the opposite, most of the time, but I honestly canât imagine my story without you being a huge part of it. I thought that you and Jasper got closer since he came in. You two are always in the Man Cave together. Youâve got routines and habits that are specific to your friendship. Youâre kinda his mom a lot.â
âI donât want to be anybodyâs mom. I donât want to be anybodyâs angel on the shoulder that they ignore. I want to be a best friend and a lover and a human with importance.â
âA lover?â Jasper repeated.
âNo⊠I meantâŠâ She shook her head.
âJasper, lets just hug her. That should work.â
âThat wonâtâŠâ Jasper came around to the other side of Charlotte and the boys locked her into a hug. It did help. âYou two are gonna either be best friends forever, or get married or something, and Iâm gonna maybe be in the wedding, but probably not even really ever see you again. We graduate soon and I donât know. The soul mates thing really shook me.â
âI never agreed to any of this,â Henry said.
Jasper scoffed. âItâs fate. You donât have to agree. But, Char⊠Itâs like⊠Even if those things DID happen. If me and Henry are best friends and lovers or anything else.â
âAnything else,â Henry slyly commented.
Jasper didnât miss a beat, ignoring him, âOur relationship wonât end your relationship. Even if he turned out to be the love of my life.â
âYouâre really running with it,â Henry said, to be ignored again.
âYouâre his parabatai.â Charlotteâs eyes glazed over and she started finally crying, leaning more into Jasperâs side of the hug.Â
âI donât know what that means,â Henry said, looking it up on his phone. âA parabatai is a pair of Nephilim warriors who fight together as lifelong partners, bound together by oath, regardless of their gender. Their bond is not reflected only in their closeness and willingness to lay down their lives for one another, but also in oathâone sworn in front of the Council⊠Facts.â
âDo you guys want to stay over? Itâs October. We can watch Crazyhead?â
âWe came over to stay over. Crazyhead. Is that the one with the zombies?â Henry asked.
âDemons,â Jasper and Charlotte answered.
Jasper added, âKeep up, Soul Mate,â and winked at him.
#henry danger#charlotte page#henry hart#jasper dunlop#hensper#Chensper#Nesha HD Fics#oneshot#Nesha Oneshots
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We Could Be Immortals (Just Not For Long)
Summary
ren·e·gade /ËrenÉËÉĄÄd/ noun a person who deserts and betrays an organization, country, or set of principles.
~~~~
Itâs perfectly natural for him to be worried, right? Heâs not THAT clingy, so it isnât like he was obsessing or something weirdâŠ. Wait what was he thinking about?
Oh right!
Swap hasnât contacted him in a while, which is weird and odd for him. The- annoyingly- taller skeleton usually enjoyed spamming his phone with pictures and memes. Heâll never be over the time Swap discovered minion memes from the surface, that was near traumatic.
He grabbed his phone from his pocket, checking it again despite only a few minutes passing from last time. Opening his texts, he gave a frustrated sigh. It had been 3 days since his last text from Swap, and the other monster hadnât even read his latest texts. He would know, Swap keeps forgetting to turn off his read receipts.
Yâknow, now that heâs thinking about it (again), he hasnât seen several others in hisâŠ. âFriend Groupâ.... Ugh, how cheesy.
Anyway, when was the last time he had talked to Razz? They werenât super close, and mostly knew each other through Swap, but they could usually bond over coming from Fell âverses, and the social impacts that result from that.
âŠ.Huh, looks like Razz also hasnât texted him in 3 days. Razz had texted last, so thereâs no way to see if he had read any of his latest messages. Weird.
Nothing from Comet, either. Though that isnât as odd, the Outertale Sans was never much of a talker in any capacity. The muteness probably doesnât help, though.
Itâs probably fine, though. Swap and Razz had probably got stuck in a RESET loop again, thatâs it. Though, didnât Swap and Honey extract a promise from their human?
Whatever, it isnât good for him to dwell on things like this. Or at least, thatâs what his therapist says. Angel above, being on the surface will always be amazing. Especially after Frisk agreed to no more RESETS. The kid never liked the Underground anyway, too much death and danger for the lilâ scrap.
Oh hello blaring cell phone, nice to be reminded you exist!
His cell phone, disregarding his internal monologue, was blaring Honeyâs ringtone. It was quite annoying, so Honey must have gotten his hands on his phone and changed it. Whatever.
ââEllo?â He spoke into the phone, after answering the call of course.
âFell! Great to be hearing from you, but I have a very important question.â Honey responded.
âUh, shoot then. Not like I was doinâ anythinâ anyway.â
âHave you seen my brother lately?â
âSwap?â
âDoes it look like I have another brother? Who else, dimwit.â
âOh hush it sugar skull.â
âI take offense to that.â
âThatâs the intention! Lay off the sweets sometime.â
âJust answer the question, Fell.â
He sighed, âNo, I havenât. I was actually wondering if you had been caught in a RESET loop again.â
âIf we were, I would not have called you, because Iâd know where my brother is.â Honeyâs accent was getting thick again, time to abort.
âChill out, Honey. Knowing Swap, he probably ran off with Razz for a training adventure or something similar.â
â....You better be right, or I will steal all of your left shoes and make them slightly uncomfortably small.â
Damn, this guy is great with threats. In his line of work, too-small-shoes are a special brand of hell. Heâd know after growing up in poverty with Edge as children.
âIâm going to let you go now, the house is a wreck currently and if Swap comes back to this chaos heâs going to obliterate every hoodie I own.â Uh oh, it sounds like Honey is about to start stress-cleaning.
âDonât overwork yourself, I know how you get.â
âOh donât worry so much, Iâll be fine dimwit.â
âFine, fine, sugar skull. See you later.â
Angel knows that things never go his way, but he can hope his friends are okay, at least.
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14x12: Prophet and Loss
Then:
Drama llama Dean spent an entire afternoon in a workshop surrounded by half naked men, and now heâs gonna bury himself at the bottom of the sea.
Now:
We open with Dean in the maâlak box at the bottom on the ocean.
It is uncomfortable to watch. Iâve had a lot of thoughts about Dean dreaming about being in the box. Itâs a huge call back to 3x16/4x01 and him yelling for Sam and waking from Hell in his own coffin --the coffin Sam insisted he be buried in --the coffin that Cas, the naive angel that lacked the people skills to know not to just reconstitute him and leave him six feet under. This is as bad, if not worse, than Hell for Dean. Deanâs been very low in the past, but to listen to Death and admit that he doesnât have free will over this situation? Gah.
It is just a dream though, albeit one that was so visceral, he woke to bloody fingernails and scratches on the motel wall. Sam, whoâs also awake, tries talking to Dean about his plan.
For This is a Beautiful Shot Science:
Sam insists that there has to be another way. Dean sees no other option than to lock himself away with Michael for eternity. (Sidenote: I just saw this post come across my dash about Swan Song, and IâM DYING.)
Aaaaaand, it wouldnât be Buckleming without some torture porn! A man has a woman tied up. Heâs dumping salt in a vat of water. Oooh, maybe super crazy demon torture? J/K, just a regular girl who doesnât deserve to die tortured. Sigh. He carves something into her arm and sends her into the water to drown. Positive Note: Sheâs fully clothed.
Nickâs in the hospital and and as soon as his leg heals, heâll be spending a lot of time in jail. Nickâs playing the âdevil made me do itâ card. And heâs also crying silent tears. NOT BUYING WHAT YOUâRE SELLING, EUGENIE.
On the road, the brothers take a moment to further dissect Deanâs plan. Both Sam and Mary hate it. Cas and Jack donât even know about it. Sam calls Cas --who clearly gets the newsletter Sam sends out to everyone. He knows.
Rowena and Cas have been on the case to extract Michael, but both have come up empty. Cas offers to speak with Dean. Sam doesnât think thatâll matter.
Torture Man has a new victim! This time itâs a dude that heâs trussed and laid out on a plastic sheet. Torture Man utters warped Bible quotes while he slits the manâs throat. He then carves something into his chest. Oh man, I have a high capacity for violence on TV, but this WAS NOT COOL TO WATCH. Do. Not. Like. After carving up his victim, he hears whispers and says, âI am the Lord.â
On the road, Michael continues to scream and pound on the inside of Deanâs mind. And, guh, Dean pulls himself together and side-eyes Sam to see if he noticed. He didnât. SAM. I mean, I get it, heâs doing what he can to stop Deanâs plan. And if Dean really wants to convince his brother this is the best idea, why worry if he sees you struggle?
Anyway, Dean jumps into talking about their childhood, and how he âwasnât always the greatest brotherâ to Sam. Samâs baffled as to where this is going. Dean was his constant family when they were kids. Sam recognizes that Dean was not just there for him as a brother, but he raised Sam. Dean continues, apologizing for siding with their dad, for trying to keep the peace. I AM LIVING FOR THIS CONVERSATION. Dean admits that John would send Dean away when he would get mad at Dean. And, like we know this, and Iâm still crying? Sometimes I feel like while every episode adds to the story of Sam and Dean, theyâre often forgotten or never mentioned again, so did they really happen? If I ended up in an alternate world where I was rich and famous, Iâd think back and rehash the fun in that on occasion. In any event, 9x7 did happen, and it happened on multiple occasions. Sam makes it clear to Dean that he let all that go a long time ago, also please stop with the deathbed apologies. Kthxbye.
Nick outsmarts the cop guarding him and escapes from the hospital.
Samâs found a case! A nice distraction from their Road Trip of Bad Decisions. They head to investigate.
They arrive at the home of the brother of the last victim.
I found this shot SO weird, but didnât really think about it again until I saw @neven-ebrez post, and was glad someone put some thought into it. :D Weâre kind of hit over the head with brother parallels here. Dean gets to hear what it might feel like for Sam when heâs gone. Sam explains that the graffiti carvings were really Enochian.Â
The brother talks about a friend, Tony Alvarez, who was more into Bible quotes than the average Millenial.
A Story in Three Parts:
I mean, really. REALLY? Cas has no chill. He also has no filter and spills that he knows about Deanâs plan. At first I was like âoh Cas bby, noâ but now Iâm ok with it. Itâs almost more painful to know that Cas knows about Deanâs plan when Dean doesnât know about Casâs deal. (And equally painful to think that Cas doesnât think about his deal because he doesnât see himself ever being happy.) (Natasha: curls up into an unhappy knot on the floor.)
Anyway, Dean doesnât want to talk to Cas about his plan and jumps right into why he called. Does Cas recognise the name Tony Alvarez? Cas says that heâs in line to be a prophet. Dean cuts him off, awkwardly tells him itâs good to hear his voice, and hangs up. He instantly chastises Sam for spilling his secret. âDean, itâs Cas. I had to tell him.â Sam and Cas are the best brothers-in-law. HUGS.
And if Tony is now a killer prophet, is Donatello dead? Dean checks in with Donatelloâs doctor. Heâs still around (brain dead and all, but not dead dead.)
Dean and Sam break into Tonyâs home, which looks perfectly normal EXCEPT for a creepy office covered with Enochian writing and pinned up photos of victims. They realize that the killer is cycling through different biblical deaths.
Cut to the Sphinx Machine Shop, where a deranged Tony has strung up his next victim. He gets ready to burn him (and Iâm just cringing in horror please stop). Fortunately, the Winchesters rush in just in time. Sam tackles Tony while Dean puts out the fire and saves the victim. Tony babbles that God was telling him to kill those people. He manages to get a hold of Deanâs gun and kills himself.
U G H
Anyway, just like that, the whole case is over.
They go over the case with Cas, who speculates that Donatelloâs not-dead-yet status has somehow triggered a malformed line of prophets. The answer seems clear...theyâve got to kill off Donatello.
Nick breaks into his old house and flashes back to the trauma of his familyâs deaths. (Somehow thereâs still electrical service? Iâm going to chalk that up to an overzealous realtor, perhaps.) The room ices over as the ghost of his dead wife, Sarah, manifests. He addresses her as...âLucifer?â AWKWARD. Sarah, played by a jarringly different actress, tells Nick that sheâs been a ghost...the whole damn time. She saw him get possessed by Lucifer and that is part of the unfinished business that keeps her tethered to Earth. There are some major youâre-cheating-on-me vibes coming from her.
âYou wanted him,â she accuses him. âYou still do,â she says, surprising absolutely nobody. Nick tells Sarah that heâs gonna go find Lucifer and he leaves her behind to be a super grumpy ghost for all eternity. Thanks, man.
At the Happy Daze nursing home (rly?) a doctor tells the Winchesters that pulling the plug on Donnie is the right choice. Dean practically smirks at Sam like, âSEE? The nice doctor is telling you to let me be tortured for all of eternity.â Cas meets them in the guise of a doctor.
Doctor Sexy: A visual story in three parts:
Sam heads off with the (real) doctor to see what sort of babbled ânonsenseâ Donnieâs been dealing. (I take a break to pedantically google the difference between brain death and vegetative states.) Dean gives Cas some serious side-eye and sass about checking up on Donatello, but Cas pulls him back. He explains that what he did to Donatello was necessary at the time, but he still regrets it. Dean attempts to commiserate and Cas spits out, âPlease donât compare this with your suicidal plan. Just STOP.âÂ
Dean pleads with Cas to support his decision. âThis is goodbye?â Cas demands in response, and then SAM BURSTS IN. God DAMN it, Interrupting!Sam.
Ugh. MAN. Give Dean and Cas five freakinâ minutes to talk through their issues 2k19. (You know I love it AND I hate it, bbys.)
Anyway, the footage of Donatello shows him speaking Enochian. Heâs muttering about striking down the first born of Egypt...heâs just spewing out the Word of God. Cas thinks Donatelloâs mind is rebuilding itself and stumbling through old prophecies. (Me: passive-aggressively googles vegetative states again.)
They head into Donatelloâs room where Cas, bless him, continues to show an utter lack of an appropriately scaled cover persona. He orders the real doctor out of the room with a cursory âGet out.â
While Sam and Dean wait for Cas to try his healing mojo, Dean flinches as he continues to struggle with Michael. Oh, Dean Bean.
They reunite with Cas just in time for Cas to have his breakthrough healing moment.
For Science
They turn off the life support machines and, after a brief jolt, Donatello pulls through. Itâs a miracle! Heâs probably not evil, right? I mean, the lack of soul will almost certainly steer him well. (Lord, weâre going to be stuck with this chicken-addicted prophet forever, arenât we?)Â
Donatello wants to know what happened and Dean slaps Cas on the shoulder and somewhat snarkily leaves the job to him. Dean. Bean.
Sam greets Dean back at the Impala with beer and misery. After the âwinâ of getting Donatello back, itâs time for them to head on home so Dean can lock himself into his torture box. Sam delivers an emotional speech about their shared experiences and accuses Dean that heâs checking out of the world too soon. âIf you quit on us today, there will be no tomorrow.â Sam rails at Dean, begging him to give them all a chance to save him. âI believe in us,â Sam shouts and punches Dean in rage and pain.Â
Reluctantly, Dean promises to go home with Sam and hold out for another option for as long as he can. Dean offers a contingency agreement: if they have no other choice in the future, then Sam and Cas have to let him go.
âLetâs go home,â Dean says to them both. Hooray! And...that should get to me but what really quietly wrecked me was Dean telling Sam quietly, âDonât hit me again, okay?â before they all climbed into the car. Welcome, hello, my heart is now in a coffin at the bottom of the ocean.
After they all depart, the title card fades ominously to white.Â
Everybody knows what makes Doctor Sexy sexy is his Quotes:
Well, the woman has a remarkable command of profanity.
If we could not have conversations that sound like deathbed apologies, I would really appreciate it.
Dean, itâs so good to hear from you.
Thank you, and itâs good to hear your voice.
âDoctor.â âDoctor.â âDoctor.â
Dean. If thereâs a spark, a hope, then I have to try. You taught me that.
No rest for the self-destructive.
Want to read more? Check out our Recap Archive!Â
#spn recap#spn 14x12#prophet and loss#dean winchester#sam winchester#castiel#cas#nick#donatello redfield#dr sexy#supernatural season 14
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Do You Feel It?
A/N: I absolutely LOVE the âseeing wings = soulmates!â troupe. However, the fics Iâve come across for Gabriel always seem to have him getting super excited super quickly. I feel like it would be a more emotional moment that takes a moment to adjust to. I wanted to see him vulnerable and flustered. Hereâs my take on the idea of wings and soulmates. âšPairing: Gabriel/Reader âšWarnings: fluffy fluff âšSynopsis: âAngles have thisâŠthing. About angels. And angel wings.â ______________________________________ Gabriel. The name was familiar, obviously. Besides perhaps Lucifer, he was the most well known Angel, even if I hadnât been raised Christian. Iâd learned about the Archangel Gabriel in the same breath Iâd learned about Jesus, seeing how he announced Jesusâs existence to the Virgin Mary. His name was spoken in a reverence by every religious figure Iâd met growing up, he was a biblical fixture in my life. Which is why I was left a bit short for words when Sam and Dean announced his impending arrival with undisguised disdain. âGabriel. THE Gabriel. Is coming here? To help us with a hunt?â Sam gave a disgruntled sigh, âyeah. Hopefully he wonât be here long and we wonât have to deal with him too much.â I knew the stories about the boysâ run-ins with the angel. As much of a show as they put on, they didnât seem to hate him as much as they hated some of the other angels. There was a deep-seated distrust and vague annoyance, but their faces didnât darken at his name like it did with others, which I took to be a good sign. Honestly, I loved the stories about Gabriel. While misguided, he seemed to have a good heart and sense of humor. I mean, come on, trapped in TV? Itâs the single-greatest prank Iâd ever heard of. The Mystery Spot mess was perhaps a little overboard, but the point he was tying to make to Sam was with good intention. Surely heâd redeemed himself, at least somewhat, in their eyes when he helped them against Lucifer. It had broken my heart to think heâd almost died, even though Iâd never met him. It was several years later that the boys found me hunting a rugaroo solo and had taken me in. Iâd been with them for about a year now, so it surprised me that I hadnât met Gabriel. I was quite looking forward to it, much to the apparent annoyance on the Winchestersâ faces. If theyâd expected me to be sulky about this interesting turn of events and expansion into my hunting life, they were sorely disappointed. â(Y/n) really, heâs not that big of a deal, and if you act like he is, itâs going to go straight to his head and make him even more of an annoying jerk than he already is.â Dean piped up, âNot to mention he did technically kill me, like, a lot. No matter what funny façade he presents, you canât afford to forget how dangerous he can be. In factâŠmaybe itâs best if you arenât here when he comes. The less he knows about you, the better, if you ask me.â âAre you kidding me, Dean?â I turned to Sam, who had an expression that was starting to mirror Deanâs. âSam, youâve got to be kidding me! I am a grown woman, the two of you are not my keepers!â They may have taken the place of surrogate brothers in my life, but they most certainly did not have any authority over me. âIf I want to meet the infamous Archangel Gabriel, I will, and you cannot stop me. Dean, no-â Dean had opened his mouth, about to argue. âI was hunting for YEARS before I met the two of you. Iâve met every monster imaginable and my religion is one of the only things Iâve held on to from my pre-hunting life. Iâve been around Cas a ton and hell, Iâve literally met Mr. Call Me Chuck himself! You say Gabriel has information that could help us, by Chuck, Iâm going to be there to meet him with you and thereâs nothing you can do about it!â I finished, a little childishly, just short of stomping my foot and sticking out my tongue. âThis oneâs firey, I like her. Whereâd you find her?â Startled, the three of us whipped around. Standing in the middle of the library behind us was a (rather attractive) man. He was much shorter than the boys, but a couple inches taller than me. He had golden blonde hair and caramel-colored eyes that seemed to constantly sparkle like he was mid-laugh. His face was upturned in an amused smirk. He noticed me watching him and gave me a wink. âGabriel, Archangel of the Lord, but I believe youâve figured that out.â He turned to the boys, âNo holy fire? No pre-drawn angel banishing sigils? Boys, I donât know whether to be disappointed in your lack of preparedness or impressed with your increasing capacity for trusting people. What can I do you for?â The boys begrudgingly began explaining to Gabriel the details of the case. We suspected the witch weâd been tracking had somehow gotten hold of a Hand of God. With Gabrielâs attention fixed on the boys (or, mostly fixed. Every so often he would glance at me, almost like he was sizing me up. It was both intriguing and intimidating) I took a moment to examine the most incredible feature of my new acquaintance: the six massive golden wings protruding from his shoulder blades. They seemed to fill the entire room. They looked like they were spun with pure gold. Not only did they reflect light, they seemed to radiate light and warmth. There was an edge of one of the wings near me. I resisted the urge to reach out and stroke it. I wanted to know if they were as soft as they looked, but I didnât want to overstep any weird angel boundaries. I couldnât help but be a little confused. Iâd been around Cas a hundred times. Iâd met Hannah and Balthazar. Why had they kept their wings hidden? Gabriel seemed to be proud of his, showing them off like he was. Every so often he would give them a gentle shake, as if he was adjusting them, causing the light to ripple down his feathers. The effect was mesmerizing. If Casâ wings were half as beautiful, surely heâd want to show them off, too. ââ(y/n)? (Y/n), you there?â I shook my head a little and turned to the three pairs of eyes watching me, waiting for a response. I wasnât sure whether or not mentioning an angelâs wings was acceptable or appropriate, so I decided to keep my thoughts on their beauty to myself. âSorry, I got lost in thought for a minute there. What were you saying?â Dean replied, âwe were saying that we need hard proof before we go charging in, just in case this is the real deal. You ready to tank this bitch tomorrow?â âSure,â I replied. âThe three of us? OrâŠall of us?â I tried to ask innocently, glancing at Gabriel. With all my heart I wanted Gabriel to be there, too. However, I had only just met the man. I hadnât even spoken to him yet. Why I so desperately wanted him to stay I didnât know and I didnât want to beâŠweird. Gabriel was watching me, dear Chuck I hoped he wasnât reading my mind. âYou, me, and Dean tomorrow,â came Samâs reply. âWe need to cover our bases and find out everything we can about what weâre dealing with tonight. If this truly is a Hand of God, we need to be prepared.â âIâll be on standby,â Gabriel added. âJust a quick prayer and Iâm there. Now, whoâs hungry?â Gabriel ended up spending the afternoon at the bunker. After he popped in six pizzas (two topped with chocolate sauce and candy. It looked awful but according to him âcandy goes good with everythingâ) Gabriel half-helped the boys research and half-spent his time talking to me. I tried to help research with the boys, but I couldnât help myself talking to Gabriel. There was this strange pull I was feeling toward the angel. Perhaps itâs because heâs an archangel. Against my normal thorough hunterâs training, my head was only halfway in the researching while he sat across from me talking about his favorite biblical misconceptions and telling me stories about the boys from before Iâd met them. âHereâs a thought,â I said two hours later after closing the book Iâd been attempting to read from. âWhy donât we simplyâŠask Chuck?â âWell, we donât exactly have him on speed-dial,â replied Sam. âBesides,â added Dean, âHe split after the whole Amara thing, remember? âThe world has youâ and all that bullshit. I doubt heâd answer even if we could call him.â I nodded my head, conceding to the reasonable argument. I grabbed another book and pulled it toward me. I could feel eyes on me. I looked up and my eyes met Gabrielâs. He was watching me with an intensity that almost made me uncomfortable. Instead of opening the book, I stood up, breaking eye contact. âI need some fresh air. Iâm going for a walk.â The boys didnât look up from the books they were engrossed in. Dean grunted and Sam gave a vague wave of acknowledgment. Determinedly not looking at the angel, I grabbed my jacket and walked across the room and up the stairs to the door. Making sure I had my key, I stepped out into the cool evening air. I took a deep breath and began walking. I barely paid attention to where I was headed, vaguely west toward the sunset. I had walked a radius around the bunker of a few miles in every direction during the year Iâd spent here and my feet took me to one of my favorite spots: a small clearing in a grove of trees on a hillside, perfect for watching the sunset. I sat down and surveyed my surroundings. The air was definitely helping me clear my head. What was wrong with me? It was like Gabriel was clogging my senses, making my head fuzzy and warm. It was a strangely comfortable suffocation, one that was equal parts invited and confusing as hell. I had literally only met him this afternoon! I had never developed feelings for anyone this quickly, especially feelings this strong! It didnât make any sense! âYou feel it too, donât you?â I stood up quickly, turning to the voice behind me. I relaxed immediately once I saw Gabriel. Which was also wrong! I was a hunter! What was I doing relaxing at the sight of a potentially dangerous creature that I barely knew? Gabriel seemed to read the mix of emotions on my face. âItâs okay. Iâm not going to hurt you. IâŠdonât think I even could. I have thisâŠweird pull toward you. Am I crazy? Do you feel it?â It was almost unnerving seeing him so vulnerable, asking for reassurance. The stories Iâd read and learned about for as long as I could remember were of this mythical and intimidating figure of Heaven. The stories the boys had told me were of this powerful and annoyingly pretentious asshole. The man before me wasâŠa man. He reached his hand up to awkwardly scratch the back of his neck, obviously uncomfortable with my silence. His wings twitched, causing the light from the setting sun to dance with the golden luminescence of his feathers. The movement caught my eye, which he noticed. His hand froze on his neck and his eyes widened. I met his eyes and his eyebrows cinched, mouth slightly agape. He shook one of his wings purposefully. I glanced toward the movement and back to his face, confusion Iâm sure was evident on mine. His hand dropped from his neck and he released a long breath he had been holding. He took a step backward as if in shock and asked in a quiet voice, ââŠyou can see them, canât you?â Slowly, I nodded. âGabrielâŠwhy can I see your wings, but not Castielâs? Hannahâs? Balthazarâs? Do they keep theirs hidden?â Gabrielâs focus on me was intense as he seemed to gather himself. He cleared his throat and took a couple steps toward me. His hands looked like they were attempting to reach out and take my arms, but he was holding himself back. âUmâŠno. Not technically. Thereâs thisâŠthing. About angels. And angel wings. Even we canât see each otherâs wings.â This surprised me, but it only deepened my confusion. Angels couldnât see each otherâs wings? So, why could I? âI guess thatâs not entirely true,â he amended. âIn certainâŠcircumstances, we can. Itâs simply one of those things. Showing your wings is kinda like showing your privates. Itâs an intimate thing. Only reserved for specialâŠpartnersâŠâ he trailed off. I stepped toward him. We were inches apart. The fuzziness in my head was starting to return, along with a strange clarity. âPartners?â I pressed. âWell, more likeâŠmates. LikeâŠsoul mates. It sounds cheesy, but only an angelâs soul mate is able to see an angelâs wings. You canât see Castielâs because heâs not your soulmate.â âBut I can see yours. So that must meanâŠâ âYeah.â He closed the distance between us, allowing his hands to wrap around my back and hold me closer to him for a fiercely passionate kiss. I returned it with fervor. His hands trailed up my arms to cradle my face. My hands found their way to his hips and our bodies pressed against one another. Every cell in my body was on fire. Every ounce of my being was screaming how perfect this felt, how natural and overwhelmingly right. I wanted to kiss him for the rest of my life. I started to giggle while we kissed. He broke away and rested his forehead against mine. âWhat, in the name of my father, could be so funny at a moment like this?â He teased. I grinned at him. âIâm standing on a hill in a field kissing THE literal archangel Gabriel whom happens to somehow be my soulmate. If my mother could see me nowâŠâ he chuckled and kissed my nose. His wings, unbeknownst to me, had wrapped around us, forming a sort of cocoon around us both. I started to reach my hand toward the feathers close to me, but stopped. I glanced at Gabriel, who gave an almost imperceptible nod of permission. I continued my reach and stroked the feathers. They felt like clouds woven into a fabric. Their softness was indescribable and the warmth was comforting to the touch. Gabriel let out a hissing gasp the moment I made contact. I pulled my hand away and looked to him immediately, terrified that I had somehow managed to hurt him. He noticed my distress and kissed my forehead. âItâs okay. Iâve justâŠnever felt anyone touch my wings before. Itâs like if you suddenly had nerve endings in your hair. Itâs startling, but extremely pleasant.â Just then, my cellphone began to buzz in my pocket. I pulled it out and glanced at the screen. âThe boys seem to be getting worriedâŠhow long have we been out here?â I couldnât see the sunset behind Gabeâs wings. When he pulled them back, I learned that not only had the sun gone down long ago, but the heat radiating from his wings had effectively blocked off the chill of the night. I was immediately onslaught by cold air and wrapped my arms around myself, shivering at the temperature difference. Gabriel noticed and held me in his arms. âHold on tight, sugar,â he whispered in my ear before snapping us into the bunkerâs living room. Dean and Sam, who had been sitting on the couch and in an armchair respectively, both jumped up as we materialized in front of them, concern evident in their faces. Concern that quickly turned into confusion and apprehension as they took in the protective and possessive way Gabriel was standing with his arms around me, and the comfortable way I was leaning my back against his front. Deanâs eyebrow slowly raised as he caught my eye. Grinning sheepishly, I looked at the two of them and said, âboysâŠyou may want to sit down. I believe you both need a break from research and thereâs someâŠthingsâŠ.that need to be talked about.â
#supernatural#supernatural fanfiction#wingfic#soulmate au#Gabriel x reader#Gabriel fic#reader can see Gabriel's wings#waywarddaughterwrites
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what about all the shit you done to me?
this is long. Â I hope you guys enjoy.
marlee.
âBitch, we should go out!â My voice slit the air in half, overpowering the gentle sound of James Blake who had been crooning on repeat for an hour now.
My statement earned her eyes and then a smirk that let me know she wasnât completely against the idea. I nearly smiled â easygoing Erin was my favorite.
âGo out where?â She gazed at the backwood in her grip before bringing it to her lips.
She wasnât much of a drinker. Smoking was her thing. And she did a lot of it.
âI donât know,â I shrugged and then cackled. âLetâs do 1OAK.â
âYou need to stay your drunk ass here.â She murmured as a smirk bit at the corners of her lips.
âIâm not drunk.â I swore. âI only drank wine.â
She chuckled, smirking at me. âYeah bitch, a whole fucking bottle!â
With a laugh, I glanced at the Petrus bottle on the table. It was my special occasion wine, as it was very expensive but at the moment there was nothing special about my life. It was the complete opposite.
âLetâs get pretty and gooo.â I pinched her bare thigh, disrupting my own rancid thoughts with my words.
âIâm only going out if we in VIP.â She took a pull of her weed. âI ainât with that standing in heels all night shit.â She snapped on the exhale.
âFuck I look like?â I quickly responded, offended. âOf course weâll get a table.â
âIâm just saying.â She murmured and then cackled at my peeved expression. âI ainât realize you were a socialite and shit.â
I wanted to remind her that Larry lived in clubs but now wasnât the time to bring him up. Erin would probably go on and on about how trash he was and then weâd argue because of my automatic will to defend my husband. He was problematic but he was my problem. Bad mouthing him in any capacity was unacceptable. It was grounds for me to go the fuck off.
âI mean, you know.â I smirked and then stood, leaving the topic there. âI need something to wear too.â
âYou wanna drag me out to some raggedy ass club filled with a bunch of scammer niggas and you wanna stretch my shit out too?!â
âFuck you mean, stretch your shit out?!â I frowned. âYou callin me fat, Erin?â
She shrugged. âYou sure as fuck donât wear a size 2 like me.â
âYo, you rude as fuck,â I snapped and she grinned. âJust find me some shit that stretches.â I muttered, standing and leading the way to her bedroom.
It took what seemed like forever for us to get dressed. Most of the time was spent arguing. Erin insisted that we just stop by my place so that I could grab one of my own dresses but I didnât want to go there. It was cold and empty and a reminder that my life wasnât playing out as planned â that my marriage was a joke.
I needed her to understand that without me having to explain it. I needed her to stop trying to oversimplify things, namely my life and feelings.
In the end, I won the argument though for a while it seemed as though I wouldnât. Arguing with her was exhausting. Most times I wanted to tap out just for the sake of staving off a migraine.
After having me swear to God and put my word on everything else I loved Erin allowed me to squeeze into a chartreuse colored Herve Leger number she had. With it I wore the strappy Sergio Rossi heels Iâd had on earlier.
âShit, this bitch keeps riding up.â I complained, tugging at the containing material. âNext thing I know, my ass gon be out.â
âThis line is too fucking long, Marlee.â Erin huffed, ignoring my complaints.
She didnât care how uncomfortable the dress was. The only thing she cared about was me not spilling the cocktails I intended to drink on it.
âOkayâŠâ I cut my eyes at her.
She muttered something under her breath and I knew straightaway that it wasnât pleasant. Not wanting to argue with her, I bypassed the line and headed for the door.
âDeucy,â I smiled up at the bouncer.
His frown deepened at the sound of his name but as soon as his hardened gaze found mine he stopped scowling and smiled a smile that could brighten even the darkest soul.
âMarlee,â He cooed.
It was hard to believe that one of the toughest bouncers is the city was smiling and cooing my name when seconds prior he was threatening to dismember some unruly white kid whose privilege wasnât strong enough to grant him entry.
âHi, honeybear.â I cooed, embracing him.
His midsection was sturdy and wide, inhibiting me from wrapping my arms completely around him. He never seemed to mind or notice as he worked to squeeze the life out of me.
âIts been too long,â He spoke, releasing me from his hold.
As soon as I was free, I worked to position my dress for the night at the appropriate length. Knowing Iâd be playing a game of tug-a-war with the designer hemline annoyed me but it was the small price I had to pay for not wanting to venture home.
âI know! You been good?â I quizzed, genuinely interested.
Our small talk was disrupted by disorder in the constantly growing line and with a promise to catch me later, Deuce let us in before tending to the conflict.
âMaybe you are a fucking socialite!â Erin yelled over the music once we were in the club.
âMaybe.â I grinned, leaving it there and heading towards the bar.
With my wine wearing off I wanted another drink or four in my system immediately. Weâd opted into catching Uber over to avoid the fight over who was going to be the designated sober loser.
Erin watched silently as I handed off my card to get a table and bottle service going. I could nearly hear her questions but I ignored them as the scantily clad waitress led us to VIP and the tufted booth that came with it. With a promise to return in a bit she left us to decide what weâd be poisoning our livers with.
âWhat you drinking?!â
Drakeâs vocals filled the club, guaranteeing two things â that the people attempting to converse were yelling every word or that people were up dancing. No in between.
âIs your socialite status getting us a discount on this table? Is that why youâre handling everything?â
âIâm handling everything because Iâm the one that invited you out. I want to have a good and comfortable time with my best friend.â I smiled, needing her to leave the topic alone.
But leaving shit alone was impossible for her. âIâm just saying, you knew Bubba at the door then we have this great table in VIPââ
âYou ladies ready?â The waitress returned and I knew straightaway that some angel was watching over me and didnât want to have me barking on Erin.
âYes!â I chirped despite the fact that I hadnât even looked at the menu. âThe Code â two of em and a bottle of Armand de Brignac.â The waitressâ eyes immediately lit up as I rattled off the name of the pricey champagne.
âPerfect. Be back.â
âThe fuck is the code?!â
I laughed at the expense of my friend. She wasnât much of a drinker. âItâs Pineapple juice, D'usse and Disaronno⊠Itâs like an amaretto sour.â
âSounds good.â
âIt really is. Itâs some shit that sneaks up on you too.â I grinned. â A couple of them and youâre good.
With an enthusiastic nod, she grinded in her seat leading to my laughter.
Our drinks came, Drake transitioned into Rihanna and Rihanna transitioned into Migos. The energy in the club was great. People seemed to be buzzing with joy â or maybe it was just me buzzing because Iâd been drinking for hours now.
Iâd noticed my liquor intake had increased substantially in the past few months. Of course it didnât feel like I had a problem but it was certainly something that I noticed. I didnât do any hard liquor, just wine, but my normal 2-3 bottles a week had turned into 5-6.
Smoking was a hobby Iâd picked up on but then quickly dropped after Larry found me passed out and then rushed me to the hospital. After being placed on suicide watch the herbal drug seemed less appealing though the alcohol and anti-depressants mixture was mostly to blame.
âBitch, we need to be over there with those niggas!â Erinâs voice exploded in my ear as she nodded towards a nearby group in VIP. âAll those gold bottles and shit.â She observed. âYou know they got money.â The conclusion came with a tap on my thigh.
âWe got our own money. We good.â My response forced her to kiss her teeth.
âI thought you came out to have fun!â She whined.
âI did!â I gestured around. âThis is fun â thereâs good music, Iâm here with my bitch, I got my drinks⊠I look amazing. Fun.â
âSitting here half dancing to music is a dub.â She waved me off.
âWell, get up and dance, E.â She smirked at my challenge.
âYou the one that â oh shit sis, he looking over here!â
âWho?â I quizzed disinterested.
I looked good â I expected men to look. I only became annoyed when they approached me with their nonsense.
My wedding ring never left my hand, making my tolerance for men and their faux ignorance slim to none. The ones that approached me were always super flagrant or the âyo man donât let you have friendsâ type.
âThe fine nigga from that table.â Erinâs excitement didnât quell my disinterest. âHe staring hard as shit.â
Other men didnât interest me â point blank. Â I couldnât afford to entertain them. I only desired one man. Dealing with others for the sake of boredom or lack of male energy would do nothing but put a wedge between Larry and I. The damage from Pierre and I was still very much prevalent.
âI ainât thinking about none of that.â I took a sip of my champagne as I peered around the popular night spot.
It was crowded as usual. In between the wooden ceiling and chevron floors was a slew of energized bodies. The warm lights created a gold glow throughout the place that added to the vibrant energy.
The chill vibe here brought thousands out, most who werenât fortunate enough to be granted access. Celebrities flocked here more than any club in Manhattan. The last time I was here Iâd spotted Rihanna and the time before that Mayweather. It was a wonder people want access to the luxe but chill night spot.
âHe thinking about ya stank ass. And he coming over here!!!â Her gleeful declaration was a boot of annoyance to my gut. âBitch!â She slapped my thigh.
âErin!â I warned, willing her to stop everything she was doing at once.
âLadies,â The voice was like navy silk over the blaring trap music.
âHello,â Erin greeted sweetly. âWhats ya name?â She didnât waste a second with her advance.
I felt his gaze even as I gave my attention to the glossy, black bar and those who approached it. I watched those who desperately waved the bartenders down and rolled my eyes as I caught sight of a few guys annoyingly hovering over uninterested women.
âMy name is Jarell. Yours?â I heard him speak but didnât bother to look.
âIâm Erin.â She cooed, sweetening her voice that was usually hard and aggressive.
Erinâs annoying introduction prompted me to roll my eyes. Her sudden burst of energy around this man irked me. Sheâd been a drab, complaining ass bitch since weâd arrived but now that we were faced with a person with a dick she wanted to show out.
Typical.
âAnd yours?â The smooth voice called out as the rim of my champagne flute met my lips.
My glare flickered upwards, clinging to a pair of round brown eyes that read as innocent. His gaze narrowed at the contact and he watched patiently as I took my premeditated sip of my drink.
âMy what?â
âYou name?â His clarification was partnered with a pinch from Erin.
âMy name is Marlee.â I announced, not caring to dilute the boredom in my tone.
âCool.â He nodded and then smiled. It was a great smile compromised of white teeth and lush lips. âYou Jamaican?â
âNope but she is.â I quickly diverted the attention back to Erin, not caring to have it on myself.
The sound of her kissing her teeth was music to my ears. She hated talking about her West Indian background and after years of friendship I still didnât quite understand why.
âReally? Where in Jamaica?â
âKingston.â She was lying but I wouldnât dare call her out on it.
âThatâs cool. I just spent some time down in Saint Catherine.â I nearly laughed, as thatâs where she was really from.
âWhy you go there?!â Her disgust was evident.
Not caring to hear his answer, I glanced away from the two. My eyes roamed over the expanse of the club as the lyrics of the Gucci Mane song the DJ selected fell from my lips.
âCan I buy you ladies another bottle?â
Her ass was probably doing an internal bankhead bounce, I thought as he pretty much confirmed that he did indeed have money. He was offering to buy a whole $400 bottle of champagne as compared to simply dropping $30 for a new round of drinks.
âWeâre fine.â
âYeah,â
Our answers were simultaneous and complete opposites to my dismay.
âYou sure can, Jarell.â Erin reiterated, cutting her eyes at me, daring me to say anything.
I took the dare with my chest out. âJarell, we appreciate it but weâre fine, really. We havenât even finished this bottle.â I gestured to the gold bottle on our table and offered him a small smile.
âWell Miss Marlee, can I at least have a dance?â
My smile dropped marginally. âLater?â
âI'mma hold you to that.â He smiled, bid Erin a goodbye and went back to his group of rowdy friends.
âBitch!â
âYou donât even drink like that, E!â I laughed.
âSo what! It was free liquor.â
âNo, there was definitely a fucking cost. His ass would have bothered us the whole fucking night had he dropped money for that bottle.â
âYou need somebody to bother your uptight ass.â She concluded, partially giving me her back.
Not caring about her attitude I peppered kisses on her cheek before standing. âLetâs dance.â
âNah,â She refused even as she caved under my pulling of her arm.
We danced until the songs became wack and our feet became achy. The plush seats swaddled us as Erin told cruel jokes about ill-dressed party-goers. Our laughter was loud and our hands were adorned by liquor-filled cups.
I was more than shocked when Erin demanded we have another round of cocktails plus shots. The waitress quickly gathered up the order, knowing drunkenness led to more spending. With the liquor came a spike of energy and yet again we were up dancing to the latest in music. I was first to burn out and sat while Erin continued to go at the music.
âHe fine as shit!â Erin dramatically declared, falling against me as she sat.
Having been already seated and laughing at a twerking Erin, I shifted to accommodate her frame. The liquor had certainly spiked her energy and for a while itâd had the same effect on me. However, my racing thoughts and growing anxiety was the culprit for the chill Iâd found. To my fortune Erin was too loaded to notice that I was no longer on ten with her.
âWho?â
âThat nigga with the Yeezys.â
Annoyed with her description my eyes instantly moved to the floor as I searched for the person she was speaking up. When I spotted the expensive sneaker my gaze began to trek up his frame for confirmation of Erinâs claim.
âHe look Puerto Rican â what you think?â She pressed, leaning closer to me. âMaybe Dominican.â She added when I failed to respond.
âDominican.â I muttered, knowing that to be a fact.
The guy she was speaking of was one I knew, and couldnât stand. Heâd never done anything to me besides be nice but my envy made it difficult for me to acknowledge that factor. My envy was rooted in that fact that he saw my husband more than me.
The guy Erin was eye-fucking was Mike, Royâs brother â Larryâs good friend.
âWe would have some bomb ass kids!â I wanted to acknowledge her outlandish remark but I was too busy searching for the body that I knew was present.
VIP had suddenly gotten louder and more crowded. The energy had shifted. The air was denser, making it harder to breathe. Or maybe Iâd just drank too much and was being ridiculous.
âYou stupid.â I managed to distractedly reply to my best friend who was clueless as to what I was going through.
She replied with more foolishness only I couldnât quite make it out. Distracted was an understatement. I was completely brainsick at this point. My vision was tunneled and searching for what I loved most.
As soon as my eyes landed on him a heat consumed my entire body. My skin began to tingle and my heart began to pound. The skimpy dress I wore felt even more constricting, making breathing a struggle.
I shifted and rubbed my neck, never once allowing my eyes to fall off of him.
A million emotions raced through my mind. My head acted as the Autobahn, hosting a plethora of feelings and giving them free reign to be as fast and reckless as they wanted.
Glee was in first place and arousal trailed closely behind it. Longing was catching up to both and not one to be outdone shame was close behind.
I was here based solely off of my emotions. And I wanted to leave because of them too.
My need to see him overruled my pride and my common sense. I wanted to be embarrassed but there was no space for that emotion as my body was far too occupied by longing and angst.
For the most part Iâd been living my life as a single woman while my husband did whatever he did. Our calls were minimal, our physical contact was nearly nonexistent and to be frank, I missed him.
I missed everything about him â the light sound of his voice and the way it dropped deeper when he spoke his native tongue, his imperfect smile, his perfectly firm yet perfectly gentle touch, his scent that was exclusive to only him. Everything. But more than I missed those things that were tangible to my senses, I missed our moments. I missed us.
It was when the bright flash of blue moved out of the corner of my eye that I finally took my eyes off of my estranged husband. The cobalt unitard that Erin wore grew further and further away with each second that passed.
With a sigh and a final glance at an unknowing Larry I shuffled after her, easily finding that she was in route to the ladies room.
The neutral toned, earthy dĂ©cor extended to the bathroom. The space was warm and inviting â it was homey yet refined. Mirrors lined the walls, rich woods acted as accents and the black and white stoned floor prevalent in the rest of the club was also present.
In the room of black, white and rich browns stood a vivid blue figure that was bound to turn red from anger.
âErin,â I called her name through a sigh.
Nothing could prepare me for the war of words we were about to have. No matter how gentle I went in, how soft my voice was, how nonthreatening my approach was Erin would still bark.
And she did.
âYou dragged me out cause you knew this bum ass nigga was gonna be here!â Her explosion of words lacked a question mark at the end because she knew.
My lips pressed into a line, inhibiting words from flowing outward â not that I had any. Frankly, I didnât know what to say. She was right, Iâd wanted to come here to this particular club because I knew my husband would be here.
Desperate?
Maybe.
She kissed her teeth. âThatâs fucked up, Marlee.â
âI apologize.â I attempted to take the easy way out.
âBitch, please.â But she quickly rerouted me. âYou ainât sorry.â
âI donât want you to be upset with me.â I muttered, watching her through the mirror. âWe were having such a good time.â
Her frown was deep, twisting her pretty features into a gnarly visual. Her black rimmed eyes were narrowed and locked on me. Her red lips were twisted, symbolizing her utter distaste.
âI justââ I sighed brushing my ring clad left hand over the cool gold toned counter. âI miss him. I wanted to see him.â
âFor fucking what?!â She exploded, causing the thin Latina next to me to jump and then make her way towards the exit.
âWhat are you yelling for?â I quizzed calmly, quietly.
With copious amounts of a alcohol pumping through our systems I knew getting into it Erin wasnât the smartest option. I needed her to watch her tone.
âCause you out here being dumb as fuck for this nigga who donât give a shit about you!â Disgust laced her tongue, tainting the air of the bathroom.
I blinked and chewed my inner cheek and counted backwards.
4,3,2âŠ.
âErin, regardless of what you feel, thatâs my husband and if I wanna miss him then I will. If I want to be dumb â for him then I will.â
She chuckled at my expense. Her laughing at me was meant to inject my spine with humiliation. She wanted me to feel foolish because she thought I was. She wanted to belittle me.
âA ring permits you to behave like some desperate idiot?â Her words stung. âTo chase after a man who clearly doesnât want ya ass anymore?â
Another girl approached the sink, applying her berry hued lipstick. I watched her, wishing I felt the ease she was currently exuding. Her movements were fluid and graceful. She was at peace and it showed. Meanwhile, I was about ready to pop my bitch of a best friend in the mouth.
âI never pushed my problems on you. I never pushed my marital woes on you. I never pushed Larry on you. Yet, youâre standing here judging me and acting as though I have to ask for your permission to feel anything that I feel for my man. Heâs my husband and if I wanna be desperate for him or dumb for him then I will. I understand you being tight about me bringing you here but donât use that as a platform to air out how you truly feel about me.â
My eyes left the burning ones of Erin, finding the vivid lipped girl again. Her movements were no longer fluid but stiff and robotic.
The realization that Erinâs nasty energy had worked to screw up hers annoyed me. When she caught my gaze she quickly tucked her gold tube of lipstick away and excited that bathroom.
Without another word to Erin I did the same, bidding her a silent 'fuck youâ.
The trek from the bathroom back to VIP took no time as determination fueled my stride. I spotted him straightaway and without another thought I marched up to him, tapping his shoulder.
Curiosity and then recognition clouded his eyes as he looked at me. And when I failed to speak he took my silence as a cue and allowed his eyes to roam my scantily clad frame.
âI owe you a dance.â I smirked when his eyes were finally on mine.
âI thought I was gonna have to come back and beg you.â He smirked, leading me away from the booth he and his friends had been occupying.
âYou donât seem like the type of man who begs.â
âFor you I woulda made an exception.â I flushed and then cursed myself for taking the corny rebuttal seriously.
I spun around, giving him my back as the bass heavy song filtered through the club. His hands instantly moved to my hips as I grinded against him.
Tilting my head back, I quickly took in my surroundings creating a countdown in my head. I knew without a doubt that this two person party would be over before the song ended.
Questions that included too much lip were whispered in my ear. My eyes slipped closed as I mouthed the words to the popular Beyoncé song.
The feel of Jarellâs hand moving down to my thigh was enough to make me falter. The feel of a pulsing heat looming over me was enough to make me freeze.
It was when the body behind me disappeared that I opened my eyes, finding a furious Larry inches away from me. I nearly laughed â it was as though he had a radar or some shit. I briefly wondered what the hell Larry had said to my dance partner to make him disappear so fast but in the end decided that I didnât care.
The fitted cap he wore over his twisted hair was low on his face, creating a shadow that tugged at my arousal. The black garments he wore fitted him perfectly and beckoned thoughts of me peeling them away to the forefront of my mind. He looked amazing.
I stared at him, not caring that he hadnât called me since landing in New York. Or that Iâd found out that he was even in New York via his best friendâs social media account. Iâd missed him, and I was happy to see him.
Thatâs all that mattered.
âWhy you here?â He pressed rudely, distorting my previous thoughts.
âIts a free country.â I smirked, keeping my cool.
I could play games with Larry all day. I was great at this. Acting unaffected was my part time job though I could easily admit that my ability to seamlessly do so had fanned the fire that destroyed our marriage.
âYou like this guy?â He jumped to the root of his irritation.
âI donât know,â I shrugged gleefully, noting his pinched expression. âWhat do you think?â
The vein along his neck nearly popped as he scowled at me â eyes narrowed, nostrils flared, jaw tensed. His body wavered even as he stood stiffly. I nearly smiled.
âYou cheat on your boyfriend, Pierre and go home with this guy?â His lips curled upwards, forming a mixture of a smirk and a snarl.
Typical Larry â saying nasty things to gain a reaction.
âMaybe.â I gave a typical Marlee answer â one that lacked all care.
With the speed and agility of a ninja he pulled me to him, snaking his arm around my midsection. His blunt fingertips dug into the soft space just under my rib cage as his glare narrowed in on me.
âWhy you play with me?â
His warmth nearly melted me to a pile of goo. The popular Le Labo scent that wafted from his body was intoxicating in every way and I wanted nothing more than to drown myself in the essence of him. But in this moment he was feeling the complete opposite about me. He was pissed and jealous, and he looked like he wanted to choke the life out of me.
âYou come here in this little dress and dance crazy. Who you wit?â The residual scent of cognac on his breath licked my upper lip as his face neared mine.
The thought of him pregaming with Roy annoyed the fuck out of me. Larry had never been much of a drinker. However, Roy had the ability to help morph the man I thought I knew so well into a drinker, a cheater, a heavy smoker â lord knows what else they got into.
At the thought of his crusty ass Dominican friend, I glanced in his direction, finding his peculiar gaze riveted on the two of us. The glare I threw at him was meant to devour his soul and feed it to demons. I couldnât stand him and though he knew already, I wasnât above reiterating it.
Larry grasped my chin, forcing my eyes back onto him before I could gauge Royâs reaction. âWho you wit?â
âJarell.â I rattled off the guys name, not interested in mentioning that Iâd truly came with Erin.
His crushing grip moved from my waist to my hand and without another word he yanked me behind him as he created a one man stampede through VIP.
âYo!â The familiar voice was enough to make me crane my neck. My resistance was enough to force a furious Larry to turn.
He paused when he found Roy rushing up to us with curiosity in his eyes and a million questions on the tip of his tongue. Disgust curdled in my stomach as he grew closer. Revolted, I took in his stringy hair and beady eyes. The BBP top that covered his upper half annoyed me because Larry had the same one and it was my favorite thing of his to wear â not anymore, I thought.
âI leave.â Larry spoke before he could.
âBruh, we just got here andââ
Larry shook his head, cutting him off. âThis important.â
His statement was a shocker. For months now Iâd felt anything but important when it came to my husband. Everything else he involved himself in was important. His work, his family, his friends, his Luzy⊠Iâd grown accustomed to being an afterthought for him â the forgotten piece of his life.
My grip on his hand tightened even as I said nothing. I had nothing to say. His words didnât deserve an applause â me being important shouldnâtâve even been something he had to explain. The fact that Roy even deemed it appropriate to question his leaving â with me â spoke volumes about where Larry had positioned me in his life in recent months.
âAight, Bro.â Roy shrugged before looking at me. âSup, Mar.â
I cringed hearing the nickname no one gave him permission to give me. âEat a dick, Roy.â His snickers followed me as Larry pulled me towards the exit.
The ride home was dead silent. In fact the sound of Larryâs voice came only when he rattled our address off to the taxi driver and then thanked him before exiting. When we made it to the building weâd been inhabiting for years, he pulled me along, muttering a cloudy greeting to Ted.
Heâd released my hand only to allow me to exit the cab and when my feet were planted firmly on the ground he took it hostage again, leading me as though I was incapable.
Once in the elevator I snatched my hand away and moved to the opposite side of the small space. âHad I known you wouldnât fucking talk I woulda stayed with Jarell.â
Larry was on me before I could even finish my sentence. âStop play with me, Marlee!â
âFuck you, nigga.â I shoved his chest, sending him back to the opposite side of the elevator. âYou donât get to come back around here telling me what the fuck to do. All I did was dance with the guy.â
âYou let him touch you like that â you know what people say when they see that and know you my wife?!â
I hadnât thought of the fact that Larry was well known by the people in the club, making me well known. I also hadnât cared.
âDo you know Iâm your wife?!â I roared, earning his silence.
The elevator came to a stop on our floor and the doors slid open. Neither of us made a move. Larryâs chest was heaving as his anger coursed through him and I was forcing myself not to cry.
âComere,â He sighed as the doors crawled to a close.
Refusing to move, I stared at him. I searched for the man Iâd grown to love more than any being on this earth. His physical was the same but everything else was different. I hated it.
âCome here, Marlee.â He called again.
âLarry, Iâm not fuââ
âPlease.â His voice cracked, quickly shifting the energy and within seconds I was in his arms.
He held me to him, threatening to pulverize my every bone. His hug was desperate and the sighs that left his mouth were of relief. It confused me. I should have been the one having the internal celebration, not him.
My heart throbbed when his lips pressed to mine. The feel of them was foreign and familiar all in the same go. Iâd spent so much time reminiscing on his kisses â his everything â and now I was experiencing it without the help of my imagination. It was sublime
It took mere seconds for the kiss to grow desperate as we both worked to catch up on what weâd been missing for what seemed like decades.
His hands moved to my ass as he hoisted me up. As my legs wrapped desperately around him, I slammed my hand on the door open button. With blind finesse Larry moved out of the elevator and down the hall towards our apartment.
âFuck,â He rasped, pinning me to the door as his lips roamed the flesh of my neck. âI missed you so much.â
His words grew legs and ran over my nerves, triggering things I hadnât felt in ages. Sure I was aroused but that was no tough feat. I felt wanted and that was a sensation Iâd been deprived of for far too long.
Desperation curdled in my belly as I gripped Larryâs cheeks, forcing his eyes on mine. They were hazy, blurred with lust. It took them what seemed like forever to focus but when they did, I spoke.
âUnlock the door.â My voice was a thin rasp. It reeked of need, tainting the hall and tarnishing the walls.
I heard the keys only he didnât move. His lean body was pressed to mine, making my back one with the door. His warm D'usse laced breath danced over my face and his lengthy fingers melted into the globes of my ass.
âLarry,â I hissed, impatient. âOpen the door. You canât fuck me in the hall.â
A devious smirk fitted itself to his lips, challenging my statement. A dangerous mixture of fear and arousal curled in my gut, forcing me into action.
I snatched the keys from Larry and dislodged myself from his hold, not wanting to give him enough time to prove me wrong. I knew he would. The thought scared and excited me at the same time.
Reminding myself that Ted was probably viewing the cameras, I whirled around facing the door. The action prompted Larry to immediately dropped his hands to my hips. He gripped the stubborn flesh and grinded against my ample backside, showing his lack of concern with our settings.
My hands trembled as I wrestled with the keys, trying to find the one that would grant us access. To my dismay they all looked the same.
âLarry,â I huffed. âWhich key?â I breathed, trying to ignore how good his hands felt on my bare thighs.
âArgent.â He murmured, moving my hair to the side to grant him access to my neck.
âTheyâre all fucking silver.â I cried out.
My helpless moans drifted down the hall as his tongue danced across my neck. I prayed the walls were thick enough, that the doors were sturdy enough to block my sounds of pleasure from the neighbors.
His teeth joined the party, securing my flesh in a searing hold. My heart dropped, producing a deadly throb between my thighs. My breathing hitched, sending me wheezing like an asthmatic. My body trembled, quivered and shook, loosening my grip on keys.
The clatter rumbled through the silent corridor like a marching band, bringing my attention back to our current surroundings â back to reality.
Without thought I reached for the keys, knowing we needed to get the hell out of this hall before someone came out and spotted us. However, my husband had other things on his mind like taking advantage of my folded position.
I gasped when he raised my dress so that it bunched around my waist and groaned when his knowing fingers met my needy flesh. Fire replaced the blood in my veins as he pushed the saturated seat of my panties to the side. His fingers reacquainted themselves with the part of me only he knew.
Up and down, up and down he stroked my slit, gathering my moisture in the whorls of his fingers. âYou so wet.â
His voice was a rasp and I didnât need to see his face to know that his eyes were low and his lip was imprisoned by his teeth.
âSo wet.â He whispered, as my back arched, opening me up further to him.
âSomeone will see us, baby.â I whimpered, slamming my eyes shut when the pad of his thumb met my clit. âFuck.â
âThey sleep.â He swore and with that he tugged at the delicate sheer panties, ending them.
âTed,â His fingers invaded my honeyed canal, sending me reeling. âThe cameras.â I moaned, grinding against his hand.
âThey not face us.â His voice was strained with concentration as he worked to tear me apart.
His deliberately curled fingers thrusted into my heat over and over, threatening my sanity and stability. I was gone, and he knew it. At this point I would fuck him downstairs on the front desk for Ted, all the neighbors and who ever the fuck else was wondering around TriBeCa to see.
âLarry,â I cooed gripping the doorknob as the little bit of sense I had withered away.
âYou like that?â
âYesss.â I spread my legs wider despite the fact that I knew accommodating Larry in such a manner would only lead to trouble, and a lot more pleasure.
He hypnotized me with his fingers, circling my engorged clit over and over and over again. Pleasure was shooting through my veins and with the help of alcohol I was in shambles.
My moans were back to back, filling the hall but my ability to care was nonexistent. I was close. My orgasm was creeping up on me at a shocking rate. I blamed my excitement and lack of proper release in the past several months.
My knees buckled and spine curled as Larryâs fingers moved slower, dragging over thousands of desperate nerves. Frantically my hands searched for an anchor to balance me in the midst of this blissful storm.
In rapid french Larry prompted me to soak his hand, and I did. I drowned it, showing him just how backed up I was due to his neglect.
By some miracle no neighbors came out to investigate as I mewled like a cat in heat.
As I slumped against the door, exhausted, Larry retrieved his keys. He quickly worked the lock, granting us the access I so desperately wanted.
Larry wasted no time backing me into yet another wall as soon as we were enclosed in our place. His kisses were hot and desperate. His touch scathing. His anticipation fueled me bringing me back to peak arousal within seconds.
âBabe, be careful. This is Erinâs dress.â I breathed as he recklessly tugged at the banded fabric.
Larry was known for destroying my garments in the process of disrobing me. My tattered La Perla panties were a prime example. His aggressive ways did wonders for my libido while severely damaging my wardrobe in the process. It was a simple equation of give and take.
However, him fucking up my best friendâs dress was not an option. The mere thought of the hell sheâd raise nearly drained my vitality. She was particular about her shit and she hated LarryâŠ
He kissed his teeth, showing his distaste. In the moment I couldnât tell if his frustrations were rooted in the fact that his Hulk-like ways wouldnât fly tonight or the fact that Iâd mentioned Erin.
His hand rested on my hips and his eyes rested on mine. I could spot the defiance. It stood nearly as proud as his arousal, and partnered with it was apathy.
Not willing to risk it, I took a step back. My sigh was inward as his hands fell away from me.
My stare locked on his as I gripped the hem of the dress, raising it until my bare bottom half was exposed.
âStop play,â He warned, licking his lips and pivoting forward. And though he didnât say it, I knew that if I didnât shed this dress quickly heâd do it â his way.
Relief swarmed me as I shoved the dress over my hips, tossing it to the side. My husband swarmed me next.
His kisses were honeyed and his touch was blistering. I felt so many parts of him on me that I couldnât focus on the sensations each appendage created. Sensory overload would be what the coroner would scribble on my death certificate. Larry would be the suspect and his tongue, teeth, lips and hands would be submitted to evidence as murder weapons.
âYou know what I miss so much?â
âWhat?â
âHow you taste.â Liquor and lust had effortlessly remixed his voice. I loved it.
Unable to formulate words, I hissed and then shivered. My knees quaked as he neared me and gave completely when his arms went around my waist.
He handled my weight without complaint as he pressed his lips to mine, drugging me with his need. His kisses were slow and sweet but between each curl of his lips and flick of his tongue was a promise to destroy.
His lips slipped from my mouth, trailing a hot path down my neck while his hand busied itself with the needy flesh between my thighs.
âYou miss me?â His voice was strangled by my flesh but I still heard him â loud and clear. However, that didnât stop me from pretending like I didnât.
I wasnât quite ready to be vulnerable. Given he already had me just how he wanted me, I wasnât ready to start verbally spilling my truth. My womanhood was screaming 'I missed youâ loud and fucking clear. That was all he needed â for now.
The soft trail of his lips was disrupted by a stinging nip via his teeth. I hissed out only to moan when he repeated the same action, adding a pinch of my nipple to the equation.
âNow you can no hear me?â With my clit being stroked, my nipple being strummed and my neck being suckled I could barely think straight. Hearing was a luxury.
My reply was a mangled whimper that left my husband dissatisfied. His punishment doubled as my pleasure as he nipped my collarbone and pinched my nipple.
âLarry,â I gasped when he was on his knees before me.
His eyes met mine and a sure smirk that was designed to cripple me contoured his lips. I cradled his head, weaving fingers between twists that needed to be done over. His lips made a journey of the fleshy globe of my breast before finally abducting my nipple into his warn cavern of a mouth.
My knees wobbled and twitched as though I was trying to emulate one of Lauâs crazy dance moves. In reaction, Larry gripped my ass tighter as though his hold there would stop me from tittering over.
His hand dropped from my ass to my equally fleshy thigh and his lips fell away from my breasts only to land on my torso. I cringed inwardly as his lips feathered over my not-so-evident rib cage down to the area just above my belly button.
My heart-rate quickened as I thought about the tenants Iâd housed, and how they hadnât survived.
He peppered the sweetest most tender kisses over my belly. His plush lips traced the space that had once been stretched by our love. His tongue ran over flesh that had been treated by non-ablative laser to rid of evidence that Iâd even been pregnant. His attention to the part of my body that brought the most shame was crippling me. It was too much. And just when I was sure he would bring me to tears, he gripped my thigh, placing it over his shoulder.
His mouth was covering my pussy before I could blink. His ability to take me from one extreme to another like that was an act of terror.
I gasped at the feel of his tongue parting through my flesh and groaned when the silky appendage reintroduced itself to my clit.
My every nerve bowed to him as warmth ballooned in my belly. The silken touch of his tongue felt like everything that Iâd ever wanted and needed. It was the answer to my every prayer â the outcome of my every wish.
My head fell back as his tongue swept down, circling my opening. My body froze and gushed as my brain tried to take on the multiple sensations. I was bound to short-circuit.
We should have been taking it slow as it had been a while but here we were, inebriated and going full throttle. Well, Larry was â I was merely trying to maintain my balance and keep from showing all my cards.
When his tongue slithered its way up my syrupy passageway both my balance and pride were things of the past. A pleasure induced wail left my throat and my body folded like my bones didnât exist.
As though he expected me to crash he carefully guided me to the ground, never allowing his mouth to loose contact with my sex. When my back pressed against the wood flooring weâd meticulously picked Larry threw my legs open, stretching and spreading me to his liking.
Card after card flipped over, revealing themselves as I spasmed, shook and squirmed against his mouth.
âYou missed me?â He tried again, wearing my juices as an accessory.
A broken moan was my reply but it wasnât the answer he wanted. He tilted my hips, angling my body so that he had access to all of me. My mouth fell open and eyes nearly crossed as I tried to make sense of why this felt so good.
My soul nearly left my frame when I gazed down, finding Larryâs eyes latched to my face. His gaze was dark â ravenous, his brows furrowed. Twists fell over his forehead, creating smoldering shadows over his eyes. Needing to touch any part of him, I reached an unsteady hand out, gripping his hair.
I watched him watch me fall apart as his lips latched and pulled me to the gates of heaven. There was a glint of appreciation in his eyes as he licked my common sense away. His eyes grew darker with every mangled whimper that left my lips. He was depleting me and I, fueling him.
âLarââ The remainder of his name was swallowed as his tongue began to slowly circle my clit.
As though choreographed, my every muscle tightened. An uncontainable heat lingered in the pit of my belly and my joints morphed into putty, rendering me immobile.
The ball of nerves thatâd been bouncing around in my womb came to a sharp halt before exploding into a million bits.
âPlease,â I wheezed as my body trembled under the pressure of my release.
Desperately I swallowed gulps of air, sure that I wouldnât make it as aftershocks ruled my body. My being burned with a detrimental combination of relief and anticipation. I wanted to retreat and beg for more all in the same breath.
The shifting of my body loosely gripped my attention as I focused on calming my racing heart. I was in a state of bliss where everything was blurred and glazed over. Everything felt distant, except for the throb between my thighs.
The heat consuming me intensified. It grew hands and caressed me, lips and kissed me. It had a voice, a familiar one, that revealed just how much Iâd been missed, how much I was loved and how much I was needed.
Fingers that gripped my thighs seconds prior were now between them, caressing, worshiping. My breathing deepened as I found myself on he brink of another orgasm.
With an inward sigh that evolved into a moan, I opened my eyes finding Larryâs face above mine. His lips thatâd whispered saccharine statements where inches from mine and as though he detected my thoughts he leaned in, giving me the sweetest kiss my lips had ever known.
His fingers continued to work, bringing me to the brink yet again. His fingers were warm but they were no match for the heat brewing between my thighs. I opened my lips to warn him, to urge him to retreat but all I managed to do was sob his name as my body yet again teetered over the edge and out of my control.
Spasm after spasm ripped me apart as Larry gripped my hips, seemingly holding me together. In the distance I heard my pleas â they were thin and broken. Both he and the liquor Iâd overindulged in had drained my vitality.
Larryâs body lingered over mine and before I had the chance to enjoy the weight and warmth of him, he was sliding into my heat like a hot knife through butter.
His name was jerked from my mouth due to a mixture of shock, pleasure and pain. I hadnât even realized heâd striped himself of his clothes but I was glad he had.
The initial sting resonated as more than just a physical ache â it was emotional. Iâd been without him for too long. My body was being forced to readjust to what itâd once known so well. Heâd been away for eons.
Heâd left me longing, craving and aching for him. The effects of his neglect was burrowed deeper than I couldâve ever imagined.
I tried to ignore it but my body refused to. It stretched, ripping stitches from unhealed wounds.
âWhy you cry?â He paused, hovering over me. âI hurt you, my baby?â
âNo. Iâ itâs been a while.â I managed, wiping at my face before pressing my palm to his cheek. âIâm okay.â
He peered down at me through narrowed eyes as I willed his concern away. He didnât look convinced but when I tighten both my external and internal grip on him he took heed to my words.
Pleasure consumed his entire face, causing the smoke of smugness to cloud my lungs. His breaths were short and heavy. His lips were open forming a small 'oâ and his nostrils were flared. He was in his own personal heaven.
âYou feel so good.â He managed, moving slightly to extract his length only to roll back into me with a spell-binding stroke.
Our moans intertwined as our gazes locked. We both possessed expressions of awe. Had it been that long that we were shocked at the feel of each other? Had we really been that deprived of pleasure?
His length nudged my center over and over, building pressure in my womb. The fit was snug and with it came a mild ache but the pleasure overruled everything.
Larry quickly turned the living room into a stage for our performance. He had me on the floor, the kitchen island and had even attempted the couch until I reminded him that the expensive piece of furniture was a no sex zone.
With my mind set on the bed that we hadnât occupied as a couple in forever I guided him there. Only Larry was as hopeless for me as I was for him and came to a stop in the hall, several feet away from our bedroom door.
The cool wall met my back as Larryâs heat settled against my front. My hands pressed into his shoulders as his did the same to my ass â gripping, massaging, positioning.
His eyes bore into mine as his length met my weeping center and with a thrust forward we were connected. Larry hissed and I purred, digging desperate fingers into his striated arms.
My thighs clutched his hips in a warm embrace as he rolled into my core, driving me nuts. Everything about him felt so good. It was impossible.
How had I had this man so many times and still managed to be in awe?
âTu aime ça?â (You like that) He quizzed, rearing back only to meet me with a heart churning stroke.
âUmmhmm,â I moaned as my hand moved up to his jawline, finding it strained and pulsing.
âJe vous ai manquĂ©,â (I missed you)
His voice was crowded with pleasure. It was deeper, coarser â dark. It was enough to make my nipples harden and clit throb. And as I moaned out, I wondered if it was the nature of his voice or what he was saying that did it for me.
âJe vous ai manquĂ©,â The repeated statement nearly made me weep.
Moving forward I pressed my lips to his neck, earning his pleasureful groan. His neck was one of his many spots and one of my favorite places to worship. My tongue followed suit and my name fell desperately from his lips.
His pleasure dizzied me. My own thirst to please him made me lightheaded. It had been too long since Iâd been able to. I was not only thirsty but hungry â desperate.
Gripping his shoulders, I adjusted my weight quickly shifting control in our current position. My back moved away from the wall and my thighs hugged Larry tighter as I lifted, grinding on his length.
âFuck,â
âMmm.â I moaned in his ear, harboring his length between my needy flesh.
I was his personal sanctuary. I wanted him to make a home out of me and never leave. I wanted to be responsible for everything that made him smile â everything that made him whole.
âTell me you love me.â I purred, riding him with purpose.
With my thighs burning and lungs quivering, I willed myself to slow down but the internal option do so wasnât there. Instead I accepted the fact that I would expire while reminding my husband of exactly who he belonged to.
âI love you.â Came his gritted reply.
My hips worked faster. âYou missed me?â
âYou know I do.â His hands were frantically moving over whatever part of me he could reach as his face twisted in torturesome pleasure.
âYou belong to me?â I moaned, unable to take my own ministrations.
âFuck, Marlee.â His hands were at my ass, willing me to slow down. And I did but that didnât stop the way I used my pelvic muscles to grip him, holding him hostage in decadence.
âTell me.â I rotated my lower half, knowing my life depended on what he said next.
âIâm yours,â He hissed and his eyes crossed as I grinded. âYours.â
The feel of his heat coating my insides took me over ten consecutive edges. I screamed and gushed and shook. And just when I thought stability was near Larryâs voice sounded.
âWe not done.â
And we werenât. By the time we made it to the bed Larry had found a powerful source of energy. It fueled him, urging him to mold my body to his liking, fucking me like only he knew how.
âYou missed me?â He asked the question for the billionth time as he took my body from the back.
My breaths were short bursts, symbolizing my struggle. My arms quivered as I fought to hold my upper half up. My body was arched and melting into the mattress, adding strain to my every muscle.
I was tired but still I wanted more. I wanted it all.
âAnswer!â His hand met the globe of my ass with a prickling slap.
âYesss!â I finally gave in as my arms gave out, planting my face into the plush mattress.âI missed you so much.â
Silence filled the room and his body left mine. Too weak to move, I lay there, trying to catch every breath Larry had fucked out of me.
My hair that Iâd spent way to much time curling now stuck to my neck and back in wet chunks. My makeup that Iâd delicately painted on my face was now smeared all over my expensive duvet. Erinâs dress was somewhere in a ball that would make her want to choke me.
Larry had ripped me apart and left me open and I couldnâtâve been happier.
The thought of him made me raise my head but the feel of his tongue moving up my pussy from the back made me drop it just as quick.
Curses and prayers left my lips as he dragged me closer to his face. I moaned and twisted under his oral assault. His tongue was an agile snake, writhing over my most sensitive spots. He knew exactly what I liked and did it to perfection. He deconstructed my pleasure and put it back together again.
Unable to deal with how good he was making me feel, I pistoned forward only for him to thirstily pull me right back to his waiting mouth.
âNo run.â He warned upon slurping at my moist folds.
âLarry,â I whimpered as my stomach clenched.
My breathing grew erratic as his tongue teased my opening before pushing into the tight space.
âOh god!â My back bowed, nearly folding in two.
Larry held me firmly against his face as I tried to crawl away from him. He was a sadist and he was out to end me.
âYou taste so good.â He groaned, peppering kisses on the curve of my ass before licking my slit from top to bottom.
A sharp spasm of need coursed through my womb when his tongue met my clit. I was close â so close.
âI canât get enough of you.â His whispered against my pussy.
âPlease,â I begged as pleasure burned me alive.
Pressure continued to build in my womb as he bathed my clit with more attention than it could take. He stroked it, licked it, kissed it, sucked it into his sweet mouth. And with every second the needy bud begged for more and more attention.
Bliss echoed through my frame as I bucked back against his face. His tongue was both decadent and annoying. My every cell craved his mouth, every fiber praised his tongue.
My stomach ached as cramps of pleasure rippled through me only retreat under the guise of Larryâs tongue. He was teasing, bringing me to the point of nirvana only to withdraw and do it all over again. He was a maniac.
âLarâ ry,â I cried as he slid a lone finger past my folds and sucked my clit into his mouth.
âFuuuckfuck fuck!â I wailed as the erotic embers that had been building in my womb detonated, sparking massive fire. My body shook as a tsunami of utter bliss heaved through my body. And when I couldnât take anymore pleasure I passed out.
-
I felt like I was floating. My steps were lighter, my shoulders lacked all strain, my eyes were bright â optimistic. I felt great. For the first time in months I felt genuinely happy.
Larry was back.
It wasnât the sex that sparked my sudden positive outlook on our marriage. It was the feeling â the energy. Nothing he could have said or done to me in the past few hours could have made me feel as good as his energy did.
I knew Larry â arguably better than myself. Majority of the time I felt him. We were in tune and always had been, until recently â the last year or so.
When we lost Laurent things changed, we didnât feel as in tune. I felt the disconnect then, and Iâm sure he felt it too.
When Luzy came into the picture, things went from bad to worse. Not only could I not connect with him but I couldnât understand him â the things he said and did, the things he didnât say and didnât do. I felt like I didnât know him, like Iâd completely lost touch.
I had lost him.
But now he was back.
Just hours ago, I was sitting on Erinâs couch over-indulging in wine as thoughts of my failed marriage and tarnished relationship with my husband filled my brain. I was down and depressed and everything in between. I had no idea of what my future would look like, and that bothered me.
Now, in the wee hours of the morning, I was nearly skipping down the halls of the home Iâd build with my husband, wearing nothing but the love heâd covered me in.
I chewed my lip, disrupting a smile as my mind went to how Larry and I spent the night. Heâd somehow erased all the things I thought I knew about the pleasure heâd taught me. He took his time reacquainting himself with every part of me, going slow when I wanted him to go fast. He was thorough in his exploration and found delight in my pleasure. It had been too much.
In fact he was the reason I was up now. Heâd depleted me of energy and now I needed to restore it. My bladder woke me up, my thoughts kept me up and my growling stomach forced me out of bed.
I hated the fact that Iâd traded being tangled in my warm, expensive sheets and the lengthy limbs of my husband to pacing down the cool hall of my apartment. However, I knew I needed to eat. With nothing but liquor pooling in my belly Iâd soon feel nausea creep up on me if I didnât make any efforts to soak the poison up.
The fridge was mostly empty as I hadnât exactly been home but I managed to find some provolone and cheddar cheese slices that Iâd picked up from the deli a few days ago.
I placed both cheeses on the counter before going back for the mayo. From the cabinet, I grabbed ghee and some Texas toast that Iâd bought at the same time that I bought the cheese.
A loud buzz cracked through the quiet air of the kitchen and I swiftly turned around, finding the source of the disruption to be Larryâs phone.
In my haze Iâd neglected to turn on the light, as my knowledge of my kitchen and the refrigerator light had been great guides. The phone however illuminated, added a bright beam to the darkened kitchen as the alert came through.
With a quick glance I found an Instagram notification and quickly went back to forming the sandwich that would fill the void in my belly.
When my grilled cheese was constructed but not yet grilled I moved towards the cabinet for a skillet. Â I shifted a few pots and pans, not finding what I needed. Sighing, I straightened my back and pulled the fridge open, hoping the light would be helpful â it wasnât.
With a groan I paced towards the light switch only to stop when three consecutive buzzes came through Larryâs phone. And as I turned, eyeing the now illuminated device another came.
âThe fuck?â I whispered, wondering why the hell his phone was so active at 5:30 in the morning.
I briefly wondered if it were someone, uncaring of the time difference, in Paris trying to reach out. That thought alone rerouted my steps and the fact that the phone buzzed yet again when I reached it prompted me to collect the sleek device from the counter.
With my sandwich and my lack of light forgotten, I eyed the lock screen finding several Instagram notifications.
âWhy does he even have the notifications on?â I wondered as they continued to pour through.
Curious as to what was going on, I quickly keyed in my birthday, unlocking the device. Larryâs phone or itâs contents had never been of any interest to me but this was weird.
I could see if heâd just posted a picture or something but his phone has been inactive for the past few hours, as he was with me and his phone was here.
My eyes narrowed as the app loaded and I quickly went to his notifications. Majority was of him being tagged in things but that was the normal. My stomach growled and I kissed my teeth, ready to end my nosy ways and quell my hunger.
My finger swept over the home button only to pause and then lift when a new notification came in with my name attached.
@Ltladi3berlin: I canât believe this! That bitch is a snake! I wonder if @itsmarleeheaux knows. @lestwinson shame on you!!!
My mouth fell open and I quickly clicked the photo corresponding with the tag. A series of iMessage screencaps consumed the screen, forcing me to narrow my eyes.
It took all over .2 seconds to figure out who the conversation was between. It took .4 for seconds to differentiate my husbandâs broken English from the other messenger â Luzy.
My heart nearly pounded out of my chest as I clicked my way back to the mentions, finding a different screencap.
I chewed my lips viciously as the words carved into my flesh. I couldnât believe what I was reading. This was a woman who Larry claimed was his good friend and she was regarding him like this â like she was his girlfriend, his mistress.
I went to another screencap. There was a ton of them. Theyâd had more conversations in these few thread photos than weâd had in months.
A baby, I thought unable to believe that heâd confided in her about my issues with carrying to term. Heâd talked to her about our problems, my problems and she was using my shortcomings as a selling feature for herself.
âChink,â I jumped at the light sound of his voice. I hadnât heard him come in, then again it was hard to hear anything over the shattering of my heart.
With my face slack and lips tight I stared at him unable to believe that the man standing before me was the same one Iâd fallen in love with years ago. This wasnât the man Iâd married and created a million blissful memories with. The man I was looking at right now was a stranger â a liar and a cheat. A monster. He wasnât mine.
And I didnât want him to be.
Unable to stomach looking in his lying face for a second longer I pressed the power button, putting the phone to sleep. The gesture successfully killed all light in the room, leaving the space in front of me seemingly black.
Despite the fact that I couldnât see him, I could still see him. His quizzical eyes and crumpled nose. His mouth that formed and 'oâ and his barely there brows that rose to meet his hairline.
Moving forward I stopped just before him, pressing the phone into his warmth. The feel of his fingers moving over mine as he accepted the Apple device made me want to vomit.
âGet out.â I hissed, moving around him and exiting the kitchen.
He was hers now and I wished that bitch the worst of luck.
(present)
âYou quiet,â Larry observed through a sigh.
âIâm fine.â
I wasnât fine.
And he knew it.
âYou not but â Iâm ready whenever you ready for talk about it.â
We had talked about it, in Maldives. Larry had reluctantly told the tale of how âhis friend had betrayed him and posted things heâd told herâ. Those things were about me â about us.
In Maldives Iâd spared myself the details of those things. I hadnât wanted to torture myself. What I didnât know couldnât hurt me â as bad.
To my dismay, my brain and faulty memory system had different plans. Torturing me with a vivid recollection of the moment Larryâs phone, enhanced with screen caps from Luzy, found itself in my grasp.
It hurt.
It hurt so bad to know that Larry had ran elsewhere to speak about me, and my shortcomings and his unhappiness. Heâd ran to her and told her things he shouldâve been telling me.
God, it hurt.
âI go get Millie from Royâs. You come?â
âNah,â I sighed, running a hand over my hair. âSee you when you get back.â
-
what about the time you said you didnât fuck her?
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