#I like my story but I always doubt people would be interested in it
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Again with the "hi im also a Jew in Aotearoa" reblog, ive also noticed a huge rise in antisemitism. Since oct 7 i have felt increasingly unsafe existing as a Jewish person. I also happen to live in an area that is very largely leftist (or at least my circles in the area are) and i honestly feel most unsafe because of the leftists. Ive seen posters that are very clearly antisemitic everywhere, and the ones i saw calling for the freeing of hostages were crossed out and torn down. Ive shared this before but a pride event put in their kaupapa that theyre anti-zionist and my mum wore a hebrew shirt to the event (she went despite the anti-zionist stuff because its pride and she wanted to go) that said pride in rainbow letters. She was going to wear it regardless of the events kaupapa, and it was clearly a pride shirt, but she got disgusted looks from a lot of people.
Ive been using my dads last name out of concern for my safety due to having a very Jewish last name from my mum. I hate my dads name and it makes me feel sick to use it, but its for my safety. I always use my chosen name because its English, and when people ask about my birth name, which is Hebrew, and I tell them its Hebrew they again give disgusted looks. Prior to Oct 7 people would be interested in the story of my mum growing up in Jerusalem and how important being Jewish is to us, but now I just say the name was chosen because of the singer. I dont want to say the truth because im scared ill get hurt.
My mother overshares a lot and cant resist telling people about how she grew up in Israel and how important to her it is to go back some day, and every time she says it I prepare for the worst. The worst that's happened is again, the look, but im always scared.
All the leftists i know love hamas, some are celebrating the Amsterdam pogrom, they all dropped me for saying Jewish people have a right to exist in Israel. Not even saying Im a zionist, just saying Jews are indigenous and have rights. They dropped me. They put out "bewares" on socials.
I go to a yearly drama camp and so many people from there that i considered friends did things like that and i almost didnt apply to go back next year despite how much i love it. When i go back i will be shutting my mouth and keeping my head down because i do not want to ruin the experience.
It is unsafe to be Jewish here. Good friends have been cruel. Strangers are terrifying. I wont ever tell people Im Jewish if they dont already know because im so worried they will hate me.
I wanted to go to university, but the university i want to go to doesnt seem all that safe for me as a Jew anymore.
Ive lost countless friends since Oct 7.
To answer the askers question of "is anyone standing up for your community", no. Theyre doing the opposite. Heck even our own community turns on us (see: the book jewish not zionist, written by a member of my local Jewish community, who says Jews arent oppressed in Aotearoa). I think I know one or two people who arent Jewish who are standing up for us and standing with us at this time.
Also, in my town theres a big event in the city for Hannukah each year. I dont know if it happened last year, because i wasnt in town, but im worried about it this year. Its an event that i love so much. One of the few chances to meet other Jewish people in the area that dont go to the same synagogue. There is always a large police presence around, and i fear this year it will be worse. Hell im willing to bet there will be protests about it! Im worried it wont even happen. I hope it does and i pray we will all be safe, because its such a great event that i look forward to all year.
I would invite my best friend to come along as its a tradition for my family that we bring friends to share our culture with them, but my best friend is so loudly anti-zionist that if she agreed to come (i doubt she would) she would definitely cause issues. I imagine if theres protests shell be on that side.
It fucking sucks to be Jewish right now. Honestly it always has, ive never felt safe as a Jewish person in Aotearoa, but its so much worse now. We are lucky compared to other places, but its still not good.
Sorry for the long rant of a reblog btw, OP. Kinda just wanted to vent my experience since I dont think theres many other Jewish people from Aotearoa on this hellsite.
how bad is it to be jewish in NZ right now? is anyone standing up for your community? where i am antisemitism has gotten pretty bad and it feels like almost no one other than jews or ppl who are part jewish or married to jews is calling it out.
Per data from the community security group, post oct 7th to March, antisemitism increased 600%.
And this is only reported incidents.
There are not really anyone besides jews standing up for us.
The holocaust centre is getting involved with antisemitism at a university just for the sheer fucking amount of it. Leftist circles are practically rife with it.
I'd consider my ex friends to be your average leftist, like not far left but almost there. And they're super antisemitic. Celebrating the Amsterdam pogrom, calling hamas a resistance group, supporting the houthi etc.
The only support I've seen outside of jewish circles is a coworker tearing down antisemitic pro Palestine posters near our office. Like these weren't regular posters, they were antisemitic instead of being just pro Palestine
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Every time I question who would want to read my Navya and Barsaat story, my friends quickly reassure me that they would and then I feel renewed to keep writing it
#I like my story but I always doubt people would be interested in it#I mean it's a high fantasy romance between a Black-South Asian man and a South Asian woman and it's about community and#inter-faith marriages and marrying outside your culture etc#but it's also about romance and what it takes to make a good relationship#but also the importance of community#And there's magic and giant bugs that people use as steeds and yakshas that hate people#And I want to read about it but would others? I always struggle with that#c:navya#c:barsaat#keke talks
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Imo Jason is “irredeemable” by default because I don’t see what he needs redemption from.
#I don’t know if I’ve mentioned this before but joining this fandom made me fucking hate the word ‘redemption’#no person I’ve seen who is in love with the concept knows the who what where when why or how it should work in a story#apparently it isn’t just themes and tropes anymore people don’t understand the proper use of the word ‘villain’#kelseethe#also hilarious: Jason should recieve sensitivity training HR style from Bruce ‘I’m the government and children are my cronies’ wayne#if Jasons headstrong/‘answers to no one’ attitude towards vigilantism is what makes people think he's villainous#I hate to be a broken record but the baddie you’re describing is Bruce#nobody thinks he’s a villain for only trusting in his own methods/self and repeatedly isolating himself#and on top of that gaslighting and hurting people around him in attempts to do what HE **thinks** is the right thing#you people always thought *him* heroic not problematic for all these traits#the only difference is Jason isn’t psychologically abusive & controlling#yet he’s still the bad guy just cause he liberally kills folks in the crime business.#l'd argue goth ham war is the b*tman story to remind you of everything that makes Bruce authentically himself#Idk how to tell you that Bruce mentally compromising/crippling his son in a twisted attempt to ‘save him from himself’#is perfectly in line with slitting the same son’s throat because he couldn’t stand to see him avenge his own killer#and yk what a redemption arc could be interesting for someone like Bruce#because he rarely questions or doubts his choices esp wrt Jason. no matter how morally dubious they may be#I think it would be quite fun to witness his extremely restricted worldview be challenged/shattered he deserves that humbling experience
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zachariah is the best character on this show actually
#he's so funny!!!!#also supernatural always coming in with the 'character suddenly says something quiet and devastating and then moves on'#even for him#'Everybody's laughing at me!' (pause and then quieter) 'and they're right to do it.'#zach my man i will dig into your silly little psyche#i mean okay you don't really have to dig he lays it out right there#he was top dog and then failing to grab the winchesters knocked him down.#and like. we know what getting knocked down in heaven means. he knows what it means.#how much can he fail before they toss him right in the chair where he sent castiel once.#no. look. listen to me. i'm not crazy. he's fascinating to me okay.#naomi is fascinating in the later seasons for similar reasons but she has different-ish motives. on the whole she's here for the collective#and zach is certainly serving heaven's interests. zero doubt in that. but like. he is also definitely serving his own.#he wants to be top of the food chain. useful to michael. because that's one of the few positions in heaven that means you get power.#and he takes it out on the people under him! he says it himself! he's petty!#resorts to physical violence to get sam & dean to do what he wants like they are stress balls.#(stands in front of them and goes >:) im gonna fuck ur mom. who else is doing it like him.)#im getting distracted my point is like. zachariah is probably the angel the most aware of the position he's in.#different than his awareness of like. his role in the story like raphael or lucifer or michael. but his role in the system?#he understands that. he knows how to play that game very well to make himself the most powerful respected angel in the room.#heaven cult my beloved. zachariah would sell anyone out for a corn chip and a promotion.#because of course he would. why wouldn't he. him looking around at other angels thinking: well why wouldn't you. i have to get there first.#tl;dr he's so funny. literally smiling every time he's on screen im gonna miss him when he dies.#zachariah spn#spn#(no okay wait not done. all of that there. all his posturing and making sure he's in the top position.#and despite that. joshua walks on screen. says 'scram' and zach Knows he can't do shit about it and leaves. like!!!!#THAT'S IT! THESIS. DOESN'T MATTER HOW HIGH IN THE OFFICE HE IS. ONE SLAP FROM UP TOP AND HE HAS TO BACK OFF!!!#THERE IS NO WINNING THIS GAME! THERE IS ONLY PLAYING IT AS BEST YOU CAN UNTIL SOMEONE FLIPS THE FUCKING BOARD!!!)#now im done <3
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Past Wounds, Present Hearts P.SH
「Pairing」 : exbully!sunghoon x fem!reader
「Word Count」 : 10.5k
「Genre」 : smut, angst, somewhat fluff, college au
「Summary」 : you have felt resentment for sunghoon ever since the hell he put you through in middle school. now you find out he goes to your university.... and he's kinda hot?
「Warnings」 : MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!!! mentions of bullying, lower quality of life due to bullying, self doubt, mentions of drinking alcohol, implied intoxication in some scenes, college parties, sunghoon calls reader petnames, kissing, sharing a bed, nipple play, fingering, titty sucking, handjob, sunghoon turns out to be a sweetheart, cum eating, falling asleep together, and more
「Authors Note」 : i originally intended for the story to have a different ending but i changed my mind half way though and it would have been too fast paced for the word count given, i will definitely make a part two if enough people ask! not proofread
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I hate him. The smug look on his face when I walk pass him in the main campus hall. All of the girls clawing on to his shoulder, begging for his attention without knowing what fucking loser he is. The way all of the professors are so impressed with him for doing practically nothing in class. Getting a full ride scholarship for basketball to this school. I have grown sick of it.
Park Sunghoon. The name still twists my stomach after all these years. Middle school was when my hatred started for Him. He was my middle school bully. Always teasing me in front of the whole class, or making comments behind my back. What hurts the most is that he doesn’t seem to care that he used to act this way, or maybe he thinks I have forgotten. The truth is, I will never forget. It sits at the back of my mind all of the time. The people who know me from middle school still view me as this ‘disgusting’ girl who was unlikeable, because of the things that Sunghoon would do to me.
It took years for me to build myself back up, so when I saw that he was planning on going to the same university as me last fall, I was more than worried. But this wasn’t middle school anymore. I can’t let him get away with treating me like an outcast who doesn’t deserve friends.First semester of university is always scary, I was always afraid to come out my shell and meet new people. I wanted to stay on top of acedemics. My best friend Yuqi was the complete opposite. Any opportunity she got to go out and party, she would be there. And, she would surprisingly maintain decent grades as well. Now that I think about it, I have never been a party goer, not even in highschool. Then again, there weren’t too many parties that either sounded interesting, or that I was invited to.
“Kappa Alpha is having a party this Friday, you in?” Yuqi suggested. She always gets the same response. “No, you already know I can’t, we have finals next week” I shrugged. “But Kappaaaaaa!” Yuqi whined, her voice getting higher every passing second. We were walking down the hallway towards our classes. A few students looked over, but quickly decided that they didn’t want to look any further. “I hear that Kappa Alpha has the best Christmas parties every year. You have to come” Yuqi insisted, grabbing onto my arm. I rolled my eyes. “Yuqi… You don’t actually think I’m going to attend one of their parties?” Yuqi gave me a confused stare, trying to read through my expression. “Why not?” “Sunghoon is in that frat, I’m pretty sure he lives in the frat house as well. You would catch me dead before seeing me step foot into that trashy hell hole” I explained, crossing my arm defensively. She knows how he treated me in middle school, she was there to witness it.
“What? He can’t be, out of all the parties I have gone to there, I have not seen him a singular time” Yuqi said with her eyebrows furrowed, putting emphasis into each word.. I tried to tell her that yes, he is the type of guy to hide out in the frat house and not attend, but she had no idea. After some debate, she eventually gave up asking me.
That night, I lay in bed, staring at the ceiling fan as it spun lazily above me. Yuqi's words echoed in my mind, mixing with memories I'd rather forget. The Christmas lights strung across my dorm room cast a soft glow, but they did little to brighten my mood.
I rolled onto my side, hugging my pillow close. Why did Sunghoon have to be here, at my university, in my space? It wasn't fair. I'd worked so hard to leave that part of my life behind, to become someone new. Someone stronger.
But was I really stronger if I was still letting him dictate my choices? I grabbed my phone, thumb hovering over Yuqi's contact. She was probably out somewhere, living it up like she always did. I envied her sometimes, her ability to just… exist without all this baggage.
"Maybe I should go," I whispered to the empty room. The words felt foreign on my tongue. Me? At a Kappa Alpha party? It was absurd.
I sat up, running a hand through my messy hair. Yuqi would be ecstatic if I went. And isn't that what college is supposed to be about? New experiences, stepping out of your comfort zone?
But then I imagined walking into that frat house, the pulsing music, the crowded rooms. And somewhere in there, Sunghoon. Everybody loving him not knowing the kind of cruel person he is on the inside. My stomach clenched at the thought.
"This is stupid," I muttered, flopping back onto my bed. "I don't need to prove anything to anyone."
But even as I thought it, I knew it wasn't true. I did need to prove something - to myself. That I could face my past, that I could exist in the same space as Sunghoon without falling apart.
I picked up my phone again, this time opening my messages to Yuqi. "Hey," I typed, then paused. Was I really doing this? My finger hovered over the send button as doubt crept in. But then I thought of Yuqi's excited face, of the possibility of actually enjoying myself for once.
Before I could change my mind, I quickly typed out the rest of the message and hit send. "Hey. About that Kappa Alpha party… I think I might go after all." I set my phone down, my heart racing. What had I just agreed to?Yuqi didn’t see my message until the morning, but I can only imagine her physical reaction after reading her written one. “Really???? I never thought this day would come. I promise you will love it!!!” my screen read. Her overuse of punctuation was telling enough about she felt. It was Friday morning, meaning that the party was going to be later in tonight. If I plan my time correctly, we can leave my dorm around 8pm, and I would have had all of the studying done that at I needed to do for the night.
I couldn’t help feeling nervous at the thought of attending a party with Sunghoon, but I decided that this may be the perfect chance to get to know him better. Okay, not ‘get to know him better’ but maybe this could finally give him a chance to clear the air between us, to apologize properly for everything that he did to me. But the chances of him apologizing are slim to none. When I see him in campus he seems to be the snobby type, unable to admit that they are wrong. Trust me, I have heard the stories going around campus.
I spent the rest of the day in a fog, my mind drifting between lectures and study sessions. The impending party loomed over me, a mix of dread and nervous anticipation.
By the time I returned to my dorm, the sun was already setting. I sat at my desk, attempting to review my notes, but the words blurred together. My phone buzzed - another excited text from Yuqi about outfit choices. I sighed, closing my textbook. There was no point in pretending to study anymore.
~~~~~
At 7:00, a knock at my door announced Yuqi's arrival. She entered with her usual whirlwind energy, arms full of clothes and makeup. "Okay," she said, dumping everything onto my bed. "Let's make you look amazing."
I eyed the pile warily. "Yuqi, I'm not trying to impress anyone. Especially not Sunghoon." She paused, giving me a soft look. "This isn't about him. It's about you feeling good about yourself. Now, let's start with this sweater."
For the next half hour, we sifted through outfits. Yuqi was patient, letting me veto anything too revealing or flashy. We finally settled on a soft, cropped sweater and high-waisted jeans - comfortable, but still party-appropriate.
As I changed, Yuqi chatted about her day, her excitement for the party. Her casual banter helped ease my nerves, reminding me why I'd agreed to this in the first place. This was about spending time with my best friend, not about Sunghoon.
We left my dorm at 8:15, the cool night air a welcome relief for my flushed cheeks. The walk to the frat house was short, but with each step, the butterflies in my stomach intensified. Music pulsed in the distance, growing louder as we approached.
Outside the house, we paused. Yuqi squeezed my hand. "You okay?" she asked, her voice gentle.
I took a deep breath, nodding. "Yeah. Let's do this."
We stepped inside, and I was immediately overwhelmed. The air was thick with the smell of alcohol and too many bodies in too small a space. Yuqi leaned close, "I'm going to get us some drinks. Will you be okay for a minute?"
I nodded, not trusting my voice. As she disappeared into the crowd, I stood there, taking in my surroundings. Groups of people clustered around, laughing and dancing. I recognized a few faces from classes, but no one I knew well.
And then, across the room, I saw him. Sunghoon, leaning against a wall, surrounded by his usual admirers. He was laughing at something someone said, his head thrown back. For a moment, I was transported back to middle school, hearing that laugh directed at me, mocking and cruel.
Our eyes met for a brief second, and I swear I saw something flicker in his expression. Surprise? Recognition? But before I could process it, someone bumped into me, breaking the moment.
I turned away, my heart pounding. What was I doing here? This was a mistake. I was about to head for the door when Yuqi reappeared, pressing a red cup into my hand.
"Here," she said with a smile. "It'll help you relax." I took a small sip, the unfamiliar burn of alcohol hitting the back of my throat. As we stood there, Yuqi chatting animatedly about the people around us, I felt myself slowly start to unwind. Maybe agreeing to come here wasn’t too bad of an idea.I was just starting to relax, the music and Yuqi's chatter creating a comfortable bubble around us, when I saw him approaching. Sunghoon, weaving through the crowd, his eyes fixed on... us? No, it couldn't be. But it was.
He stopped right in front of us, that infuriatingly perfect smile plastered on his face. "Hey, Yuqi," he said, his voice smooth as ever. Then his eyes slid to me. "And Y/N,… it's been a while, hasn't it?" I felt my body tense, my grip tightening on the red cup in my hand. Yuqi glanced between us, her eyes wide with surprise and a hint of concern. "Sunghoon," I managed to say, my voice coming out colder than I'd intended. But then again, why should I care? He seemed unfazed by my tone. "I didn't expect to see you here. You're not usually the party type, right?" The casual way he said it, as if he knew me, as if we were old friends catching up, made my blood boil. How dare he act so nonchalant after everything? "People change," I replied curtly. "Not that you'd know anything about that." I avoided eye contact. I saw Yuqi wince beside me, but I couldn't bring myself to care. Sunghoon's smile faltered for a moment, a flicker of... something passing across his face. Confusion? Hurt? Good.
"Right," he said, recovering quickly. Looking down at the ground with a half smile, he takes my snarky response as a que to leave. “I’ll see you around, (Y/N)” he scoffs and walks away.
“He is such an asshole” Yuqi complains, rubbing my back as a way to try to comfort me. “You responded well” I watched Sunghoon's tall, muscular figure get lost in the crowd, a mix of emotions swirling inside me. Part of me felt satisfied with how I'd handled the encounter, but another part felt... unsettled. I took a long swig from my cup, hoping the alcohol would dull the conflicting feelings. "Thanks," I mumbled to Yuqi, grateful for her support. She gave me a reassuring smile, but I could see the concern in her eyes. "Do you want to leave? We can if you're not comfortable." I considered it for a moment. The idea of going back to my dorm, burying myself in my blankets and pretending this night never happened, was tempting. But then I thought about how that's exactly what the old me would have done. The me that let Sunghoon's actions dictate her life.
"No," I said, surprising myself with the firmness in my voice. "I'm not leaving. I have just as much right to be here as he does." Yuqi's face broke into a wide grin. "That's my girl!" she cheered, linking her arm through mine. "Let's mingle a bit, shall we?" As we made our way through the crowded room, I couldn't help but notice Sunghoon's gaze following us. Every time I glanced in his direction, he looked away, but not before I caught a flicker of... something in his eyes. It wasn't the cruel amusement I remembered from our school days. It was something else, something I couldn't quite place.
Yuqi introduced me to a few of her friends, and I found myself actually enjoying the conversations. It felt... normal. Like maybe I could do this whole college social scene thing after all. But then, over someone's shoulder, I saw Sunghoon again. He was looking right at us, his expression unreadable. Our eyes met for a brief moment, and I felt a jolt of... something. Before I could analyze it further, he quickly averted his gaze, a faint blush coloring his cheeks. Wait, was Sunghoon blushing? I shook off the thought. It was probably just the alcohol playing tricks on my mind.
As the night wore on, I found myself relaxing more and more. The alcohol helped, but it was more than that. Every minute I spent here, laughing with Yuqi and her friends, was a minute I was reclaiming for myself. Yet, I couldn't shake the feeling of being watched. Every so often, I'd catch Sunghoon looking in my direction. But it wasn't the mocking stare I was used to. There was something almost... wistful about it. Once, when our eyes met, he even offered a small, hesitant smile before quickly turning the other way. I don’t understand why he is trying to smile at me. It was confusing, to say the least. This wasn't the Sunghoon I remember. The Sunghoon who had made my life miserable. This Sunghoon seemed... different. Unsure. Almost vulnerable. As Yuqi and I were preparing to leave, I excused myself to use the bathroom. On my way back, I quite literally bumped into Sunghoon in the hallway. "Oh, sorry," he mumbled, steadying me with a hand on my arm. The touch sent an unexpected jolt through me. "You okay?" I nodded, unsureness in my voice. We stood there for a moment, an awkward silence stretching between us. "Listen, Y/N," he started, then paused, running a hand through his jet black hair. "I... I'm glad you came tonight. It was good to see you."
Before I could respond, he quickly walked away, leaving me standing there, completely baffled. It wasn't until much later, as Yuqi and I were stumbling back to our dorms, arms linked and giggling about nothing in particular, that I realized something. For the first time in years, I'd spent an entire evening in the same space as Sunghoon without letting it ruin my night. And more than that, I was left with the strangest feeling that maybe there was more to Sunghoon than I'd allowed myself to see. As I collapsed onto my bed, exhausted but oddly content, I couldn't help but feel like something had shifted. I wasn't naive enough to think one party had erased years of hurt and resentment. But maybe it was a start.
~~~~~
The next morning I woke up disoriented, borderline hungover. Roll over to the side to check the time on my phone. 11:09AM? It honestly felt like I slept for three days with how many drinks I consumed. I look further down the screen to see the notifications:
1:18 AM: @prksnghn02 started following you!
1:19 AM: @prksnghn02 Liked your post!
I must have fallen asleep to quickly too see this last night, but that was definitely right after we left the party.
I scroll through the conversation, smiling slightly at the messages
2:11 AM: @prksnghn02 Hey! You still here?
2:11 AM: @prksnghn02 I get it if you don’t want to speak to me.
Why was he messaging me. What gives him the right? I igonore the message and delete the message request. All that before my thumb hesitantly hovered over the follow button on his profile, eventually turning it grey. I spent the weekend as usual, going to my job at night and studying in the mornings. Though I had the awkward interaction with Sunghoon at one party, I think that I could see myself going with Yuqi to another party some time. Not soon though because finals start on Monday and I have to pass to keep my financial aid. That’s another thing that pisses me off. I work day and night to pay for my schooling by myself, and Sunghoon gets it all handed to him for being okay at basketball. He teased me for growing up less wealthy than him, but if he were in my shoes, he wouldn’t have thought it was so funny.
Monday morning I was walking through the main hall on campus, where they have to coffee shop that I occasionally stop by. Of course this time when I went, Sunghoon was standing at the bookstore across the walk way, talking to his girl-toys. It took everything in me to not make things awkward by looking in his direction, but for the split second I looked that way, he was already eyeing me down. I pretended to not notice, continuing into the coffee shop line as I would do normally. The line was fairly short. I looked down at my phone to distract myself until it was my turn to order. “I am sorry (Y/N)” a familiar voice says behind me, him lightly grazing my shoulder.
My eyes immediately snap to the owner of the voice. His brown eyes were staring directly into mine as if he could tell exactly what I was thinking just by looking at me. And I know he can. ‘Hey’ he seems to say, flashing me the smallest of smirks as his hand rests on the counter to my left. I scoff in disbelief. He really is serious now isn’t he. I try to ignore him and continue with my order, but Sunghoon stops me in my tracks. My heart starts hammering harder in my chest as I glance around to make sure no one overheard. “Hey (Y/N),” he repeats, giving me his infamous smirk. “I really am sorry” he continues. He’s watching me with a curious tilt to his head as he waits for my response.
“Can I buy you a drink? Maybe we can talk some more?” For a fraction of a moment, it’s hard to believe what’s happening.
“Whatever you are trying to do, I don’t want any part of it” I said sternly, trying to shoo him away. I know he could see the annoyance on my face but that wasn’t enough to get him to leave. “Please, I want to make things right” he begged with a hint of charm in his voice. He reaches out to hold my wrist but this time instead of swatting him away, I let him. If anyone deserves an apology it should be me. He takes a step closer to me, tilting his head slightly. “Fine I guess, but do not expect to get anything out of me” I agreed hesitantly. His facial expression completely changed from worried to… relieved? We ordered together in line while I tried my best to ignore him. His scent was a distraction. It was captivating. It was comparable to mohagany and mint. Admittedly, he is tall and handsome, even when we were in middle school he had always been cute. But I would never say that out loud. Eventually, his named was called and we both went up to grab our drinks. “Thank you Sunghoon” I said while looking down, trying to get out of the situation as soon a possible. “Wait” he says before I get to far away. “I will text you” he added. I half way smiled and walked away.
~~~~~
At lunch, I found myself leaning against Yuqi as we sat at one of our tables outside. “How do you feel?” she asked. “Better” I admitted. “It’ll take some getting used to, but I think I’m doing better” She nodded, seemingly satisfied by my reply.
“Yuqi?” I spoke again once I had my full attention back on her. She turned her attention towards me expectantly.
“Why don’t you give him another chance?” she sighed, rolling her neck around. “I mean, he seems like he is genuinely trying to make it up to you.”
“Yes he is putting in the effort now, but the pain that he put me through doesn’t just go away in an instant, it will take time for me to trust him”
“I understand” she muttered.
~~~~~
A few days had passed but I had never received a message from Sunghoon. Maybe he forgot or maybe he was scared…. I don’t know. But I can’t help but to think that I was maybe looking forward to that message. Yuqi was right, maybe he does deserve another chance. The library was my number one studying location. It was quiet, I could focus, and nobody bothers me. I actually have some time to myself. I have tested out every study area here and the to floor is by far my favorite. I press the 5 on the elevator control pad, and as the doors start closing, someone’s hand is placed between the doors, causing them to shoot back open. It was Sunghoon. I awkwardly scoot to the edge of the confined space to make sure there was more than enough room between us. His eyes light up when he realizes I was the one in the elevator.
“Would it be a problem if I rode with you?” he asked hesitatingly with an awkward smile.
“No, why would there be a problem?” I replied quickly. There was an awkward silence for a few seconds after my answer, and then I heard the elevator ding and the doors slowly start closing again. God, being around him gave me mixed emotions. His aura is so captivating, but his personality is the opposite. And not to mention that mohagany scent again. We rode to the fifth floor in total silence and exited the elevator once it stopped. When we both made way out of the elevator to walk our own directions, He gently grazed my shoulder and said “Good luck with finals” and walked the other direction.
-
Later that same evening while I was still on the library, my phone pinged with a new notification.
prksnghn02: Hey are you available?
prksnghn02: I know I said I was sorry but I really want you to know how I feel. I can’t do it over text.
I think this is the message that I have been waiting to see. I would appreciate to see him and have him fully apologize, though I don’t think this is the right time. It’s the middle of finals week and lord knows I am already struggling as is. I look up from my phone, observing my surroundings, and spot Sunghoon across the almost empty room lounging on a library bean-bag. Alone. That’s a first considering his royalty equivalent status on campus. He was clearly looking at me when I opened his message.
yourusername: Hey, sorry. I really need to study for this Sociology final. I can definitely carve out a time to meet next week.
I look up at him and point at my phone, making a frowny face and his expression mirrors mine.
prksnghn02: Who is the professor? I aced my sociology class I took over the summer. If you need any help lmk.
He looks at me with a thumbs up. His offer seems tempting, but what would I do? Sit there and hear him lecture me? It would already be hard enough to pay attention given how his arms are looking in that black fitted top.
yourusername: I will think about it.
I try to focus on my sociology notes, but my eyes keep drifting back to Sunghoon. He's still lounging on the bean bag, but now he has a textbook open on his lap. Every so often, he glances up, catching my eye before we both quickly look away. The tension is palpable, even from across the room. I sigh, running a hand through my hair. This is getting ridiculous. I'm here to study, not to play this weird game of cat and mouse with my former bully turned... what? Potential friend? The thought makes me uncomfortable. I make a split second decision on impulse and grab my phone, maybe regretting my decision later.
yourusername: Okay fine, come help me.
I witness Sunghoon look at his phone and shoot up out of his seat within the span of 3 seconds. Impressive. My heart hammered a frantic rhythm against my ribs as Sunghoon practically skidded to a stop in front of my desk. It was a stark contrast to his usual nonchalance. A smile tugged at the corner of his lips, and for a moment, I was back in middle school, his laughter echoing in the halls, the same laughter that used to sting.
“So, sociology huh?” he said with the most awkward tone possible. “What do you need help with” he continues, signaling his hand towards my messy notes. My notebook has definitely seen better days. I sighed, shoving my phone into the abyss of my backpack.
"Everything feels like gibberish. Professor Ramirez throws these massive lectures at us, and it all just blends together." Surprised laughter rumbled out of him.
"Ramirez? Yeah, he can be a bit much. But trust me, sociology isn't actually that complicated. Let's see your notes." Tentatively, I slid my well-worn notebook across the desk. He flipped through the pages, his brow furrowing in concentration. The silence stretched, broken only by the soft rustle of turning paper. I snuck a peek at him. His features were softened by a focus I wouldn't have expected. "Okay," he finally said, looking up. "This isn't so bad. You've got the basic concepts down. I think you're just getting overwhelmed by the details."
Relief flooded me. Maybe I wasn't completely incompetent after all. He settled into the chair across from me, his arm brushing mine for a moment as he reached for a pen. He continued to sort through my notes, trying to piece together what I may not be understanding. He was surprisingly patient with me, and even created examples for me to try and understand better. Not to mention that I couldn’t keep my eyes off of him as he spoke. His black hair falling loosely in front of his dark brown eyes and black glasses was so sexy.
"So basically, social stratification is like the ranking system within a society?" I summarized, feeling a flicker of accomplishment. Sunghoon grinned, a genuine smile that reached his eyes. "Exactly! See, you were getting it all along." He paused, then reached for a specific page in my notes.
"Now, let's talk about power structures and how they influence social mobility…" Time melted away as Sunghoon patiently guided me through the sociological knowledge. I peppered him with questions, surprised by my own comfort level.
He answered them all with good humor and a surprising depth of knowledge that made him seem worlds apart from the bully I knew in middle school and the jock he is now. I looked at his face once again, admiring the way he furrowed his eye brows when he concentrated. I am snapped out of my trance with
“What?” Sunghoon questioned me, tilting his face to the side. I couldn’t even comprehend what had happened until a second or two later.
“Nothing! It’s nothing. Go on with what you were saying” I averted my eyes towards the table to try and hide the blood in my cheeks. “Heh, Okay….” he chuckles fiddling with the ring on his finger. He pauses for a few seconds and picks up with “You should get home soon. You don’t wanna have late nights, right?”
He looks me dead in the eye as he says this, a hint of playfulness in his gaze. I glanced at my phone, startled to see it was already 1 AM. We'd been studying for hours without realizing it. The library, usually bustling with stressed students, was now eerily quiet.
"Oh wow, I didn't realize how late it got," I mumbled, hastily gathering my notes. Sunghoon stretched, his shirt riding up slightly. I pretended not to notice.
"Yeah, time flies when you're having fun with sociology, right?" he said sarcastically. I rolled my eyes, but couldn't help the small smile that tugged at my lips. "Right, because power structures are just a barrel of laughs." As we packed up our things, Sunghoon hesitated, then asked, "Hey, um, would you like me to walk you back to your dorm? It's pretty late." I paused, considering. The old me would have immediately refused, not wanting to spend an extra second with him.
But now... "Sure," I found myself saying. "That would be nice." We stepped out into the cool night air, the campus very quiet around us. For a moment, we walked in silence, the only sound our footsteps on the pavement.
"So," Sunghoon started, breaking the silence. "Did you find the study session helpful?" I nodded, surprised by my own honesty.
"Yeah, actually. You explain things... differently than I expected." He raised an eyebrow.
"Different good or different bad?"
"Different good," I admitted. "You're more... patient than I thought you'd be." Sunghoon chuckled softly. "Well, don't sound so surprised. Im not just a handsome face ya know.” I felt a retort forming on my lips, but bit it back.
“Yeah yeah, don’t flatter yourself.” As we walked, I couldn't help but sneak glances at him. In the soft glow of the street lamps, he looked... different. Softer somehow. Less like the arrogant boy I'd built up in my mind and more like... well, just a guy. "You know," he said suddenly, his voice quiet. "I meant what I said before. About being sorry." I felt my body tense. "Sunghoon, we don't have to-"
"No, please," he interrupted, stopping in his tracks. I turned to face him, surprised by the earnestness in his eyes. "I was a jerk in middle school. More than a jerk. I was cruel, and I've regretted it for years. I just... I want you to know that. I am sorry." I stood there, stunned. This vulnerability was so at odds with the Sunghoon I thought I knew.
"I... thank you," were the only words that were able to come out of my mouth. - I turned to face towards him as we reached the enterance of my dorm building. “Okay, I guess I can take it from here” I said, grabbing my key card out of my backpack.
“Goodnight, Sunghoon.” I entered the building and the door was already halfway closed before Sunghoon grabbed it and called out behind me, "Wait!” I stopped mid step and turned to meet his curious gaze, confused by what he could possibly want to say. I gave him a questioning look as he approached me slowly. His hands fidgeted nervously, and he took one last glance around, making sure no one was watching before reaching up to touch my cheek hesitantly. His thumb brushed the area under my eye lightly, his hand moving downwards slowly until he rested his palm flat on my jaw. I was somehow okay with this, despite the butterflies in my stomach.
My heart thudded loudly against my chest as I stared at his hand resting gently on my skin, unable to tear my gaze away from his. There was something magnetic about the way his eyes bore into me with an intensity I have never felt. “Have a good night, (Y/N)” he said softly, grazing my bottom lip with his thumb. He leaned down slowly while gazing into my eyes, a soft smile gracing his lips. My breath hitched as he brought his other hand up and cradled my cheek, brushing some loose strands of hair out of my face. “You too, Sunghoon”
~~~~~
The end of finals week had finally come and I am not exaggerating when I say that this is the most relieved I have ever been in my life. I was lounging on my bed scrolling through tik tok and I saw a message pop up at the top of my screen.
prksnghn02: Hey! A few of us are having a small get-together at the frat house to celebrate surviving finals. You and Yuqi should come.
I stared at the message, my thumb hovering over the keyboard. A month ago, I would've immediately declined. But now… things were different. The study session with Sunghoon, our late-night walk, the way he'd touched my face before saying goodnight - it all swirled in my mind, a confusing mix of old resentment and new… something.
yourusername: Let me check with Yuqi. What time?
His response was almost immediate.
prksnghn02: Around 8? It's just a few people, nothing crazy. Promise it won't be like last time.
I couldn't help but smile at that. The last party had been a turning point, in a way.
yourusername: Okay, I'll let you know.
I rolled over, dialing Yuqi's number. She picked up on the second ring.
"Please tell me you're calling to drag me out of this post-finals funk," she groaned.
I laughed. "Actually, yeah. Sunghoon invited us to a small thing at the frat house. You in?"
There was a pause on the other end. "Sunghoon, huh? You two seem to be getting along better."
I could hear the smile in her voice. "We're… working on it," I admitted. "So, you coming or what?"
"Obviously," she said. "I'll be at yours in an hour. We need to talk about this Sunghoon situation, by the way."
I groaned. "There's no 'situation', Yuqi."
"Uh-huh. Sure. See you soon!"
She hung up before I could protest further. I flopped back onto my bed, staring at the ceiling.
An hour later, Yuqi was sprawled on my bed, watching me rummage through my closet.
"So," she said, drawing out the word. "You and Sunghoon, huh?"
I threw a shirt at her. "There's no 'me and Sunghoon'. We're just… I don't know. Not enemies anymore, I guess."
Yuqi sat up, her expression serious. "Look, I know he was awful to you in middle school. But people change, you know? And he seems to be really trying."
I sighed, sitting down next to her. "I know. It's just… complicated."
She bumped my shoulder with hers. "Life's complicated. Doesn't mean you can't give it a chance."
I nodded, not trusting myself to speak. Yuqi always had a way of cutting through my defenses.
"Now," she said, her tone lightening. "Let's find you something cute to wear. Just because it's not a 'situation' doesn't mean you can't look hot."
I rolled my eyes, but let her pull me back to the closet.The frat house was quieter than I'd ever seen it. No pulsing music, no crowds of people. Just the soft murmur of conversation and laughter drifting from the back patio. Sunghoon met us at the door, his face lighting up when he saw us. "Hey! You made it." he said, ushering us inside. His eyes lingered on me for a moment, and I felt a flutter in my stomach. "Drinks are in the kitchen, we're all out back."
As we followed him through the house, I couldn't help but notice how different he seemed here, in his element. Relaxed, open, a far cry from the popular Sunghoon I was used to seeing on campus. He was wearing a simple black t-shirt and jeans, but somehow he made it look effortlessly attractive. The back patio was strung with fairy lights, casting a warm glow over the small group gathered there. I recognized a few faces from classes, but it was indeed a much smaller crowd than the usual frat parties.
Yuqi immediately gravitated towards a group she knew, leaving me standing awkwardly by the door. Sunghoon appeared at my side, two red cups in hand. "Here," he said, offering me one. "It's just punch, but fair warning - Heeseung made it, so it's probably stronger than it tastes." I took a sip, the sweetness masking the unmistakable burn of alcohol. "Thanks for inviting us," I said, surprised by how much I meant it. Sunghoon's smile was soft, almost shy. "I'm glad you came. I wasn't sure if you would." "Honestly? I wasn't sure either," I admitted. He nodded, understanding in his eyes. "Well, I'm glad you did. Come on, let me introduce you to some people." As the night wore on, I found myself relaxing more and more. The punch was indeed strong, but the warm buzz it provided was pleasant.
Sunghoon stayed close, always making sure I was included in conversations, laughing at my jokes, his hand occasionally brushing against mine in a way that seemed both accidental and deliberate. I found myself studying him when he wasn't looking. The way his eyes crinkled when he laughed, the gestures he made when he was explaining something he was passionate about. It was hard to reconcile this Sunghoon with the boy who had tormented me in middle school. At some point, Yuqi caught my eye from across the patio and gave me a not-so-subtle thumbs up. I rolled my eyes at her, but I couldn't help the smile that subtly appears on my face.
As the night progressed, people started to drift away in twos and threes. Yuqi had gotten into an intense discussion about some TV show with a guy from her psych class, leaving Sunghoon and me alone on a small bench near the edge of the patio. The fairy lights cast a soft glow on his features, and I found myself staring longer than I should have. "You know," Sunghoon said, his words slightly slurred, "I never thought we'd be here like this." I raised an eyebrow. "What, drunk on your frat house patio?" He laughed, the sound warm and genuine. "No, I mean... talking. Like friends."
His hand found mine on the bench between us, his fingers intertwining with mine. The touch sent a jolt through me, but I didn't pull away. "I was such an ass to you in middle school," he continued, his voice dropping low. "I... I didn't know how to deal with how I felt about you back then." I froze, my heart suddenly pounding. "What do you mean?" Sunghoon turned to face me, his eyes intense even in their alcohol-glazed state. "I had the biggest crush on you," he admitted. "But I was too stupid and insecure to know how to handle it. So I lashed out instead." I sat there, stunned.
The Sunghoon I knew in middle school, the one who had made my life miserable, had a crush on me? It didn't make sense, and yet... "That doesn't excuse what I did," he continued, his thumb tracing circles on the back of my hand. "Nothing excuses that. But I want you to know how sorry I am. And how glad I am that you're giving me a chance to make it right."
I looked at our intertwined hands, then back up at Sunghoon's face. The vulnerability in his expression took my breath away. "I... I don't know what to say," I whispered. "You don't have to say anything," he murmured, leaning in slightly. "I just wanted you to know." We sat there for a moment, the air between us charged with possibility. Then, without thinking, I leaned in, closing the distance between us. Our lips met softly, hesitantly at first. Then Sunghoon's free hand came up to cup my cheek, deepening the kiss.
It was sweet and a little clumsy, tasting of punch with a hint of alcohol. His lips were softer than I'd imagined - not that I'd been imagining it, of course. When we broke apart, I could feel the heat in my cheeks. Sunghoon's eyes were wide, a mix of surprise and something else I couldn't quite name.
"I... wow," he breathed, his thumb gently caressing my cheek. Before I could respond, the patio door slid open and Yuqi's voice rang out. "Y/N? You out here?" Sunghoon and I sprang apart, but not before Yuqi caught sight of us. Her facial expression completely changed, a knowing smirk spreading across her face.
"Sorry, am I interrupting something?" she asked, her tone teasing. I stood up quickly, nearly losing my balance. Sunghoon steadied me with a hand on my arm, the touch sending another jolt through me. "We were just... talking," I managed to say, knowing how unconvincing it sounded. Yuqi's grin widened. "Uh-huh. 'Talking.' Got it. Well, hate to break up this... conversation, but it's getting late. We should probably head out." I nodded, suddenly feeling very sober. "Right. Yeah. Let's go."
As we made our way back through the house, I could feel Sunghoon's eyes on me. At the front door, he caught my hand. "Text me when you get home safe?" he asked, his voice low. I nodded, words not being able to leave my mouth. He squeezed my hand once before letting go. - The walk back to the dorms was quiet, Yuqi mercifully holding back her questions until we were safely in my room. "Okay," she said, flopping onto my bed. "Spill. Everything. Now." I sank into my desk chair, my mind replaying the kiss over and over. "I... I don't even know where to start," I admitted.
Yuqi's expression softened. "Start at the beginning. And don't leave anything out."
~~~~~
Going over to Sunghoons frat house became a frequent thing over the winter break. About twice a week I would go with Yuqi and kick back with a few of his friends, the same ones that were there the first time.
During those times, we'd always end up hanging out in Sunghoons backyard, or playing in his pool. He definitely acted a lot different around his friends than I expected. More relaxed, open, less guarded. In turn he opened up to me a bit too.
“If I beat you in a round of pool, you have take a shot with me” Sunghoon said chuckling, nudging his elbow against my arm. “Come on, that’s fair!”
“I guess, but what do I get it I win?”
Sunghoon narrowed his eyes suspiciously. “You know what, I can think of something…” He moved closer to me, the tip of his nose inches away from mine. A shiver ran down my spine as I tried to resist the urge to pull away. Instead, I remained still, watching nervously as his mouth slowly drew closer and closer. “I think you might like it” he said teasingly.
“I guess I should just let you win then” I sighed sarcastically, trying to ignore the butterflies built up in my stomach.
He scoffs “I promise, sweetheart, I don’t bite” he said, moving back just enough so he could meet my eyes. His voice was low and husky, sending a ripple of heat through my body.
“So, what kind of shot?” I asked lightly, trying to ignore the way my voice shook as I spoke.
“I think I have some Don Julio” he mused, running a hand along the back of his neck.
Sunghoon it first to break all of the pool balls apart, declaring him as solids. Drinking beer between each of our turns and chatting about family and work, Sunghoon was a lot better at pool than he originally let on, because soon enough he had only 2 solid balls left, while I still had 5 stripes.
I was expecting him to have already won at this point. When he set his cue on the edge, lining up to hit one of the solids into a hole, the 8 ball shoots across the board, into the hole closest to me.
“Aw shit, I guess you won” He said with a fake defeated look.
I laughed, setting my bottle aside. “Looks like it. Thanks for letting me have a couple extra rounds” I said, winking at him. I missed my cue stick by mere centimeters, but didn’t care. My eyes were locked on Sunghoon; his hair stuck up everywhere, his skin glistening with sweat after his game, his shirt clung tightly to his frame.
A loud bang echoed off the walls, making us both jump slightly. Sunghoon’s eyes snapped towards the window behind me, his eyebrows furrowing in concern. “Someone just slammed the garage door shut” he whispered. “Did they close up for the night?”
We had spent so much time playing pool, we didn’t realize that slowly, one by one, people started to go home. This meaning that Yuqi probably caught a ride home with someone and the only people left here are the 3 frat guys staying in the house over the break.
“It’s getting late, I should probably call an Uber” I said, rubbing my eyes for focus.
“Why leave so soon? Doing Uber this late at night could be dangerous, you never know what kind of people could be out there.”
“What other option do I have? Yuqi went home already” I replied, grabbing my phone.
“You can stay here, you can sleep on my bed and I will set up a bed on the floor” he offered.
“I don’t know if that is the best idea” I muttered, staring at my feet.
“Just sleep here. Don’t waste money on an Uber, and I promise I can take great care of you.” he urged me, placing his hand under my chin so that I would finally look at him. “Do you really believe that I would let you get into a strangers car right now?”
I hesitated before nodding. “Fine, but only because I trust you.”
~
We pack up all of our stuff from outside, including my purse and all of the extra alcohol. There are so many room in the frat house and I have never been upstairs, I have no idea which one is Sunghoons. As the two of us climb the stairs up to his room, we both silently agree not to mention the previous events from the other night.
Sunghoon doesn’t know why I kissed him, And I don’t know why he kissed me. Even though he did tell me a little about the reason behind our relationship, it wouldn’t matter, he was too far gone for it to change anything anyway.
The moment we step into his room, he tosses his backpack onto the floor and gestures to the large queen sized bed sitting in the corner of the room.
“I didn’t bring anything to sleep in, I can’t sleep wearing jeans and a tank top” I said, gesturing to my jeans.
“Don’t worry about it, I can lend you something” he said, walking over to a laundry basket of clothes lying on the floor near the wardrobe. “I haven’t gotten the chance to put up my laundry, let me find something” he explains, rummaging through the basket.
He pulls out a large black t-shirt and some basketball shorts. “Here, try these on” and walked over, handing them to me, a slight smile tugging at the edge of his lips.
“Look away!” I playfully shouted while waving my hand to shoo him. “
“Oh my gosh, okay” he covers his eyes like a cartoon character.
Luckily I was wearing some spandex shorts and a sports bra underneath, so even if he did sneak a peek, which I’m sure he did, nothing too important would have been exposed. On him the clothes look normal size, but on me, the shirt fit like a dress and the shorts touched half way down my shins. “I guess I have no choice” I shrugged.
I crawl into his bed while he went to fetch an extra blanket for me out of his closet. At this point, he was already in his sleep attire. No shirt and some basketball shorts. It was hard to concentrate when he was standing there wearing nothing but shorts. I admit that maybe I was staring a bit longer than appropriate.
“You like what you see?” he says in a cocky tone, chuckling at my embarrassment.
“Shut up, you are so annoying” I scoff and roll my eyes, laying back down on the bed.
“Haha okay…” he smirks as he stands up from the closed with the blanket in his hand. “Hopefully this will keep you warm enough” he said, covering me with the big piece of fabric.
“Thank you, Sunghoon” I said, turning over to attempt to catch some sleep. He set up a little bed on the floor with a blanket and a pillow right next to the bed and layer down as well.
After sometime of just listening to the sound of the crickets outside, the quiet noises of the street, cars passing by, the occasional chirp of a bird. The atmosphere was rather peaceful, comfortable almost. I couldn't help the small smile forming on my face as I lay my head on my arm.
My brain kept drifting away from sleep, my thoughts constantly drifting back to Sunghoon. My heart rate was rising with every second that passed, I tried desperately to calm myself down, not wanting to give any indication that I was starting to get aroused. The more I listened to the sounds outside, the more I felt the overwhelming desire to be wrapped up in his arms. Just to feel him hold me.
I sigh deeply, rolling over onto my side and facing him. The soft glow of moonlight illuminating the entire room, casting light patterns on his sleeping features. If this was any other day, I would definitely stare at him until dawn, taking in every minute detail of him.
I scooted over to the edge of the bed, just close enough for me to nudge Sunghoon with my foot. “Hoon, are you awake” I whispered.
His eyes opened slowly, adjusting to the brightness of the moonlight leaking through the blinds. “Yeah” he clears his throat. “Why?”
“Can you lay with me?” I whispered again.
He stared at me for a second, trying to understand what was going through my mind. Eventually, he crawled onto the bed, lying down next to me. His body was hot against mine, making goosebumps erupt throughout my skin, but the feeling was comforting nevertheless. We laid like that in silence for a few moments, simply enjoying each other's presence.
Eventually, it became too awkward and I had to move closer into Sunghoon, cuddling up next to him. “I like this” I say quietly, resting my head in the crook of his neck, inhaling his faint scent. He chuckled slightly, positioning himself to where his fingers could comb though my hair.
I mumble, wrapping my arm around his torso. His fingers stopped their ministrations then, hesitating for a moment. I looked up at him from my position on his chest, curious as to what made him stop. I met his deep brown eyes that were focused solely on me. His gaze was soft, yet intimidating at the same time. Slowly, carefully, he lifted my head off his body and held it between his hands. Then he brought his lips to meet mine softly.
He pulled me in closer, gently running his fingertips along my jawline, making my heartbeat pick up in pace. His kisses were slow and sweet, the most tender kiss I've ever had. After several seconds of pure bliss, he pulled away slowly, watching me as if waiting for some sort of reaction. When my eyes fluttered open I met with his eyes, gazing deeply into each others’. A smile formed on my lips, making Sunghoon lean in to reconnect our lips again.
He placed his hands on the sides of my neck, holding me close to him, deepening the kiss, our tongues intertwining in a passionate dance. Our bodies pressed closely together, moving together rhythmically. His hands lifted up my oversized shorts and began roaming across my bare thighs, tracing up the hem of my shirt. We kept getting tangled in each other’s clothing as we continued kissing.
He reached my breasts, pushing up my sports bra to give them an affectionate squeeze, causing me to gasp in response. My hands moved down from his shoulders and ran up the backs of his arms to his neck, pulling on his short hairs slightly. Pulling on the strands of hair caused him to release a low growl and deepen the kiss, pulling his tongue into my mouth. Suddenly I felt his teeth graze my bottom lip, causing me to whimper slightly at the unexpected pain. When he released my lower lip, he sucked on it, sucking on it harder and harder with his sharp canine teeth. “Fuck…” I moan, gripping tightly onto the ends of his dark brown locks.
He took the opportunity to slide his hands under my shirt, rubbing his thumbs over my nipples lightly, causing my stomach muscles to tense up involuntarily. A slight smirk crept onto his lips as he noticed this, but then he proceeded to push the crop top further up on my shoulders before placing soft gentle kisses along my collar bone. He sprinkled kissed on my shoulders and chest and then moved down towards my waistline, placing soft soft kisses along my belly button. His hand started to work its way downwards, slowly caressing the insides of my thighs.
He latched one of my nipples into his mouth, gently suckling the tight swollen bud of flesh with his teeth and tongue. As his hand reached down and slid his middle finger along the underside of my left thigh, causing me to grind against his hand.
He trailed his hand back up to the bottom of my shirts and bunched it up in his hand “Can I take this off?” he leaned next to my ear and whispered. My breath hitched at how sensual he sounded.
“Please” I managed to speak out. He didn’t reply immediately, only gave me a reassuring smile before pulling it over my head, only leaving my bra. His lips found their way back up to mine, sending a surge of electricity through me. His hands worked their way to bottom of my bra, lifting it up and throwing it to the side as well. The cool air on my bare stomach and chest suddenly sent tingles all over my body, sending shivers down my spine and goosebumps all over my skin. He smiled at my reaction, continuing to caress my inner thigh.
“Is it okay if I take these off too?” he whispered, grazing the waistband of my shorts.
I let go of his arms and nodded my head yes, watching his expression change from relaxed to excited. I watched him pull those off and discard them as well, leaving only my thong on. “I hope this is okay” he smiled. He was still looking at me with those intense eyes, making it difficult for me to breathe properly.
He removed the last piece of clothing from me, both my spandex and the shorts he gave me, revealing my beautiful skin and perfectly plump curves underneath. He took a few seconds to appreciate every inch of my body before sliding his slim fingers between my legs. Instinctively my knees fell apart slightly, allowing him access to my core which caused his eyes to darken even more. As he gently traced circles around my bud, sending me into complete ecstasy, I moaned loudly, moaning in pleasure as my hips began grinding into his finger tips.
“God, you’re so pretty” he whispered, trailing kisses along my cheek. I bit my bottom lip to suppress the moans coming out of my mouth as he continued to stroke the wetness inside of my thighs. “So perfect.”
He spread my wetness all over his fingers and slid one finger inside of my desperate hole. At first, he started slowly, his thumb circling my clit while his middle finger slid in and out of my warm opening, slowly increasing the amount of pressure until I was gripping down onto his fingers with all of my strength. He increased the speed of his movements, adding another finger, pumping them hard into me. I closed my eyes and arched my back, trying my best to keep a good grip on his fingers.
“Shit, you’re so wet angel” he groans. He took his hand away to pull off his own shorts, with his boxers. His dick spring free, tip raging and dripping with precum. It was big, a lot bigger than I had expected.
I take all of his length into my fist as he continues contact with my folds. “Fuck, that feels good, baby” he says under his breath. I collect spit in my mouth and layer his tip and slide my hand up and down slowly.
I feel a familiar knot forming in my stomach as he keeps a consistent pace pumping his finger into my gushing pussy. “Agh yess” I moan on his cock, feeling the burning sensation building up. He leans down to place a tender kiss on the back of my shoulder, his warm breath fanning my sensitive skin, causing my back arch even higher. "Let go babygirl"he murmurs against my shoulder.
I let my hand rest against his erection, stroking him slowly, feeling the tip get longer by the moment. Soon enough, I can no longer contain myself as I let the orgasm rip out of me. His name came spilling out of my mouth, followed by a loud moan “Fuck Sunghoon, just like that.” I continue to hold on to him as the wave of pleasure takes over me, feeling my muscles start to seize up and my vision starting to blur.
As I'm regaining my composure, he pulls out of me, bringing his fingers up to his mouth. “You taste so good, princess” he praises, with sweat droplets forming in his forehead.My face turns red with embarrassment. I cover my face with my palms as I try to control my breathing. Sunghoon chuckles and grabs my wrists, pulling my hands away from my blushing face and places them on his cheeks instead. “Don’t be embarrassed, babygirl. That was hot” he says. My blush gets stronger by the second.
“Let me get you cleaned up” he suggested, getting out of the bed to go to his bathroom where he kept his extra cloths. He came back with a small smile on his face. He runs the rag between my legs and said “I am really happy you decided to spend the night”
“Me too Sunghoon” my smile only visible by the moonlight. He went back into the bathroom to put the cloth into the dirty clothes hamper.
“Now come here…” He brings his lips to meet mine once more. He wraps his arms around my sore body, making my face bury into his chest. Our bare skin resting against eachother was so relaxing. His skin was soft, and he was perfectly toned to my liking. He runs his fingers through my hair and begins to massage my scalp, making my whole body tremble. “It’s really late, sweetheart, let’s get some rest” he whispers and kisses my forehead, then rests his chin on the top of my head. As I lay there in Sunghoons embrace, feeling the warmth radiating off him, my eyes gradually fall shut.
-
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A Much Needed Interview (OP81)
(Part 2 of Teen Dad) Summary: After the shock of Oscar revealing himself to be a former teen dad, he joins an interview in the hopes of clearing everything up and limiting the overwhelming amount of questions he has been getting.
“Oscar, it is nice of you to sit down with us. I know it has been an interesting few weeks for you and your family. How are you guys all doing?” The interviewer asks.
‘Yeah, y’know, I had expected to one day have to open up about it all, but I never thought I’d have to do it the way I did. It has been fine, obviously my kids are young enough to not be impacted because they aren’t on social media, but it has been strange for my fiancée who is now getting hundreds of requests on her private account. I have sort of decided to take a break from social media because the response has been overwhelming and like none before. Mostly positive but I think a few people have gotten the wrong idea so I was hoping to clear everything up.” Oscar rambled. He was more nervous about this interview than any he had done before.
“Of course. Why don’t we start at the beginning, how did you and your fiancée meet?”
“We actually met at one of my races. She went to support one of her close friend’s brothers. After the race that I sadly didn’t do too well in, I saw her with her friend and I was kinda frozen in my spot, immediately head over heels. Sadly, it seems like everyone but her noticed. I was too scared to do anything so I just watched her leave. I think I sulked for days, totally regretting my decision to do nothing. A totally heartbroken 16 year old. I looked for her every single race until she finally came back a few months later.”
“Oh please tell me you finally got the confidence to shoot your shot.”
“Nope! I just stared at her and stuttered when she caught me looking then ran off. I then had an amazing race, I think part of me was just trying to make up for the embarrassment and luckily it seems my car got the memo. After the race she came up to me and asked for my number.” God, he was blushing profusely at the memory. He knew he would be getting slack for this for a very long time.
“Such a story! The young Oscar Piastri was no ladies’ man.”
“He was absolutely not. Soon after we started dating.” Oscar awkwardly laughed, sensing what was about to come up.
“And then kids came shortly after?” The interviewer asked with care in his voice, certainly able to sense Oscar’s change in attitude.
“Yeah. Uh, obviously not planned. I don’t think many people plan to become parent’s at 18. It was a shock… I didn’t handle it the best at first, something I think I will always regret. She was scared and while so was I, I should have been more supportive. I was embarrassed for a while. Felt like a total idiot. I didn’t tell anyone outside of my family and made them swear to secrecy. I also began to isolate myself from friends because I couldn’t bring myself to tell them but also felt terrible lying. A few months in I finally snapped myself out of it and began to focus on all the wonderfulness that was to come. I loved her more than anything and I would be lying if I said I hadn’t already imagined a life together in great detail. By the time we found out it was twins, a boy and a girl, I was ecstatic.”
“Well mate, I don’t blame you for your feelings. I definitely would have been a terrible father at 18 so I salute you.” The interviewer joked.
“Honestly, I had the same thought for a while, even when I was excited to have kids. I had so many doubts about it, I mean how could I not? But when it came down to it, I couldn’t afford to be anything less than a great father. Of course I had my moments, and still do years later, but I wouldn’t be able to let myself be anything less than I am. If you love your kids enough, you find a way.”
“How did having kids so young impact your career? Obviously it didn’t hurt it too much considering you are in your second year driving in Formula 1.”
“Well, I decided I wouldn’t advertise my situation unless a team was very serious about me. Prema knew, Alpine did too and of course McLaren does. All were welcoming and accommodating, as much as they could be. I don’t think I would have gone with any of them if they weren’t cool with it though. I realized the minute my kids were born I would give it all up for them, which scared the hell out of me.”
“That is admirable. All these years later you are still with their mother, correct?”
“Yes! I asked her to marry me over break. Everyone close to us had been confused as to why it took so long but we had discussed marriage together many times and made the decision that because our relationship moved so fast with having kids so young, we would wait a bit. I mean, we are still young but I honestly couldn’t wait any longer. She is everything to me and the most wonderful mother my kids could have.”
“Have your kids been around the paddock yet? I assume they are old enough to understand what you do.”
“They have been to the factory and come with me to meetings when we haven’t had a sitter for them. Luckily, they are both very well behaved in public, they also really like watching the races on tv and have somewhat of an understanding of what I do. They don’t believe I actually drive the car though.” Oscar rumbled. Trying to convince his twins that yes, their father actually does drive the cars they see going super fast, has been an ongoing issue. They seem to believe he is tricking them but have no problem believing Uncle Logan and Uncle Lando drive the cars. It has definitely humbled him immensely.
“Well you will have to fix that soon huh? Will they be attending races in the future?”
“I am trying to work that out with my fiancée actually. They are almost four so we don’t want them traveling too far, I also don’t believe they will be able to be entertained solely by the race the entire time so we have a lot to deal with. But I think seeing them on the paddock supporting me will be one of the best moments of my life. I selfishly can’t wait for them to come.”
The interview wrapped up shortly after that. Getting to reminisce on the start of his relationship and how far they have come and how many wonderful things are in the future put Oscar in a deliriously happy mood. He couldn’t wait to get home to his family.
Walking through the door, he was immediately welcomed to the sound of toddler meltdowns. Fully entering the house, he saw his very tired fiancée rubbing her face as she tried to calm her babies down. Clearly this had been going on for a while.
Despite how upset she looked, she immediately perked up at seeing Oscar had returned. But that immediately went away as she remembered the screaming kids and how messy the house and herself were.
“Sorry honey, I know you are probably so tired after the interview and meetings earlier and these two missed their nap so they are so cranky and I just-” He cut her off with a kiss. Once he pulled away she looked at him, perplexed. A kiss from Oscar was never unwelcome but it was the last thing she expected at that moment.
“Hey, look at me.” He said as he put a hand on her cheek. “I love you and our little family so much and you never, ever have to apologize for something as trivial as this. Why don’t you go get in the bath and relax a little and I will try to wrangle these two, okay?”
In her eyes, Oscar had never been hotter than he was now. Now it was her turn to surprise him with a kiss, even more passionate than the first. They would have continued if it hadn’t been for more screaming from their two kids.
Still, Oscar wouldn’t change a thing.
#formula 1 x reader#formula 1 imagine#f1 x reader#f1 imagine#f1 fanfic#oscar piastri x reader#oscar piastri#op81 fluff#op81 imagine#op81 x reader
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So Unaware | CL16
Ships : Charles Leclerc x F1 Academy Driver! Reader
Genre : Fluff
A/N : this is inspired by my own experience with a block mate from Uni. It was an entire situation, I can’t even comprehend so be distraught with me :))
Summary : When Charles mistakes Y/N’s enthusiasm and friendliness for flirting.
Masterlist
The F1 grid was having media day with the F1 Academy teams to show a united front or something like that. You weren’t so sure, you didn’t fully listen to the PR people’s instructions.
You were mindlessly walking around the ransacked snack bar looking for anything to munch on when suddenly a packet of gummies was in front of you and to your shock, it was Charles Leclerc himself who offered.
A wide smile presented itself on your lips as you thanked him for the snack. And being the nice person that Charles was he started small talk with you — the conversation found its way towards the passion you both shared it was your love for cold dairy treats! Ice cream.
Without noticing, you both got deep into talking — not minding other people present or the event happening around you. You were so deeply interested in Charles’ stories on his failed attempts to create the formula for Lec and Charles reciprocated the interest in your story of almost getting carbon dioxide poisoning as you overdosed on Dry Ice when trying to make Ice cream from home. You didn’t realize that people were noticing your interaction with the Ferrari Driver, with most of them thinking that there was indeed chemistry between the 2 drivers. People were starting to think that you had a thing for Charles.
“Ok, so what is the weirdest flavor you’ve thought for Lec” You eagerly asked the gorgeous red-clad driver in front of you who was leaning on the barriers.
“So much! But the weirdest has got to be the tomato with caviar. It was so repulsive you couldn’t imagine.” Charles's face scrunched up as he remembered the vile thing making you laugh at his theatrics.
“Well that sounds interesting, I mean caviar is salty so they balance each other out?” You muttered reluctantly
“Oh come on Y/N, don’t be nice on my behalf. It was disgusting. If you were only there to taste it” Charles said as he shook his head in amusement
“Is that an invitation, Mr. Leclerc? Count me as your beta tester then!“ You joked at the older driver.
“Oh I’m not sure, how can I be sure that you’re as good of an ice cream taster as you say you are Y/N” Charles joked back with a smile and you couldn’t help but notice the deep set of dimples on the man. How can a person be so attractive you couldn’t explain?
“How dare you question my professionalism, Mr. Ferrari driver! Well, I have a favorite Ice cream parlor near the hotel that I always go to when we drive in this country. Their Salted Vanilla and Balsamic with Strawberry is to die for! You need to try it” You exclaimed as you remembered the dainty mom-and-pop ice cream shop that held your heart — the Donofrios, was the breath of fresh air when you were having a hard time with insecurities and doubts about your career. Ever since then, it has become a tradition to visit them after every race here.
“Well ok Professional L/N. You need to take me there then” Charles replied cheekily at you.
“It would be my pleasure to share a treasure with a fellow enthusiast. How about after the race? Mr. Donofrio, he’s the owner and your fan, he would love to meet you” You giddily replied.
“Definitely! Give me your number so we can stay in touch” Charles gestures his phone towards you to put your number in his contacts.
“Oh yes of course! I swear, Charles you would love it there. Mrs. Donofrio even makes their waffle cones!” You answered excitedly as you gave Charles his phone back.
“After the race the “ Charles was cut off as you both heard someone calling his name. Looking at the direction of the voice, it turned out to be his manager.
“I need to handle something real quick, I’ll be back, ouias?” Charles says briefly squeezing your forearms and then proceeding to go to his manager. You nodded your head and sent him away with a smile and a wave.
“Did you just flirt with Charles Leclerc?” Emily, your teammate from Prema had suddenly sprung on you as she pulled you into the corner the minute Charles stepped away from your conversation.
“No? What do you mean?” You were confused at your teammate who was close to hyperventilating from excitement.
“I mean you talked with THE Charles Leclerc for a solid 30 minutes. You and him were smiling from ear to ear! Babe don’t get me started with the sparkle in your eyes” Emily said as she took hold of your shoulders and shook you till you started to feel dizzy
“Em, Stop! I’m getting dizzy. And what are you even talking about? We were just talking about racing, ice cream and some gossip in the paddock— that was it!” You exclaimed as you removed yourself from the clutches of your friend.
“Y/N, Babe. People don’t touch that much when talking about racing and ice cream” Em said a devious smile on her face as her eyebrows went up and down.
Horror suddenly fell on your face at the realization. You have the tendency to be touchy when you are over enthusiastic and excited about things — and Charles Leclerc was at the receiving end.
Based on your expression, Em then realized what had happened and started laughing hysterically.
“Y/N! I can’t believe you did it again! DUDE you’re so unaware, I love it! “ Emily was doubling over laughing at you and your overly friendly tendencies.
“EM! Not funny! Do you think Charles misunderstood? Do you think that he thinks that I was hitting on him? OH NO! Do you think that I was some creepy obsessed fan or something” You blurted out words at the speed of light. At your panic, Emily had laughed even harder.
You didn’t know what to think or do — when you felt a hand on your shoulder, causing you to look at the person.
Your eyes widened at the sight of Charles.
“Is she ok?” He asked referring to Emily still laughing with tears staining her cheeks.
“Uh… yes. I think. Yeah, she’s ok. Emily is ok” You replied forcing a smile, which you swore looked awkward. An elbowed Emily to stop laughing.
“So, uhm… can I have your teammate for a while, Emily?” Charles asked the girl who was trying her best to stop laughing. Emily only nodded as an indication of agreement, given that talking wasn’t an option at the moment.
To your surprise, Charles took hold of your hand — pulling you back to somewhere quiet.
“So, Y/N. Where did our conversation stop?” The Ferrari Driver asked with a smile.
“I wasn’t trying to flirt with you!” You suddenly blurted out, catching the Monegasque off guard.
“I’m sorry. What?” Charles asked a tad confused.
“I have this tendency to be over-excited and sometimes I get touchy… I just didn’t want to weird you out or think I was creepy and stepping out of line” You explained now getting nervous.
Charles looked at you for a solid 5 seconds then he started out laughing. He then suddenly held your hand again, now looking straight into your eyes.
“You weren’t flirting with me?” He asked.
“No…” you said quietly.
“Do you find me attractive?” Charles’ question catches you completely off guard. Rendering you speechless.
“Well do you, Cheri?” The Ferrari Driver asked once more, to which you only nodded sheepishly
“Great! Because I was flirting with you and I look forward to our ice cream date”
#f1#formula 1#formula one#f1 imagine#formula 1 fic#f1 fic#cl16 one shot#cl16 x y/n#cl16 fluff#cl16 x you#cl16 imagine#cl16 x reader#charles leclerc#charles leclerc imagine#charles leclerc fluff#ferrari#charles leclerc one shot#charles leclerc fanfic#charles leclerc fic#cl16 fic#cl16#cl16 fanfic#ferrari f1#formula 1 fanfic#f1 fanfic#f1 x you#f1 x reader
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SET FIRE TO THE RAIN | LN4
an: i'd like to preface this by saying this is purely fictional and i don't believe lando would behave like this, i've been in many situations like this or where i've watched goregous girls be brought down, if you ever find yourself in a situation like this, talk to someone and if you're too scared to do that. my inbox, my messages are open to talk, i know how difficult it is and i'll always be there for you, every step of the way. love you all <3
summary: based off of this request , the story of a girl who manages to set fire to the rain by finally cutting off a pattern.
wc: 2.6k
warnings: toxic relationship
She had sworn off men.
The last one had hollowed her out in ways she hadn’t thought possible. They’d met at university, and from the start, there was an intensity that made her feel alive, as if the world had cracked open just for them. He was charming, magnetic—a rare kind of brilliance that pulled people in without effort. But beneath the surface, there had been something darker. She’d noticed it in small moments at first, like the way he’d make her doubt her own memories or twist her words into knots she couldn’t untangle.
With him, everything good came with a price. A beautiful night could end with his cutting silence, or an ordinary conversation could spiral into accusations and resentment. He knew exactly how to keep her on edge, to keep her second-guessing herself, until she wasn’t sure where her own thoughts ended and his began.
By the time she realised how deeply he’d tangled her sense of self, it felt too late. She was trapped in a constant push and pull, desperate to hold onto the parts of him that had once felt like home, even as they chipped away at her sanity. She left university more bruised and broken than she’d ever been, feeling like a stranger to herself.
For months after, she found herself replaying conversations, picking apart moments, wondering if somehow she had been the problem. She promised herself she’d never let anyone pull her back into that place—she was done with love, or whatever twisted version of it she’d believed in.
But then she met Lando.
And he was different, at the start at least. There were no telltale signs, or maybe there were and she'd missed them all. But with Lando, she felt like a whole new woman.
Meeting him felt like something out of a story she’d stopped believing in. He was bright, alive, a force of nature. She’d been swept up almost instantly, drawn not just to his charm but to the way he seemed to move through the world. Lando was a Formula One driver—a rising star with an infectious grin and the kind of life that felt thrillingly out of reach. He wore his confidence like a second skin, turning heads everywhere he went, and somehow, for reasons she still didn’t fully understand, he’d turned his gaze toward her.
Their first days together were a whirlwind. He flew her out to races, their weekends a blur of city lights, roaring engines, and late-night conversations where he shared his dreams with a vulnerability she hadn’t expected. She felt as if she was breathing for the first time in years. Lando seemed genuinely interested in her—not just in her beauty or her laughter, but in the way she thought, the things that kept her up at night. He listened in a way her ex never had, his attention a gentle but steady presence that quieted the shadows of her past.
With Lando, she was lighter, bolder. She found herself laughing more, breaking free from the cautious habits she'd formed to protect herself. Even the constant travel, the media attention, the risks that came with his career—none of it scared her. If anything, she was excited by it, captivated by his life at full throttle. She told herself that this was what real love must feel like: exhilarating and limitless.
And yet, as the months slipped by, small things began to nag at her—a flicker of irritation in his eyes when she questioned him, a quiet possessiveness in the way he’d tug her closer when others looked her way. They were tiny cracks, the kind of things she could overlook. But her instincts, dulled as they were by the thrill of his attention, began to stir, whispering that all wasn’t as perfect as it seemed.
She brushed off those whispers. She had promised herself she wouldn’t let fear drive her life, wouldn’t let a good thing slip away just because of shadows in her past. Lando was different, after all. He had shown her sides of herself she thought she’d lost forever.
But sometimes, late at night, she couldn’t ignore the familiar tightening in her chest, a flicker of unease she couldn’t explain. It was nothing—just a bad memory she needed to bury, she told herself.
She was safe, she was happy.
And that was all that mattered.
Until it didn’t.
It started in the small, invisible ways. A slight edge to his voice when she couldn’t make it to a race. The way his grip on her hand tightened a fraction too much when she was talking to someone else, even just a friend. She told herself these things were normal, the quirks of a man under constant pressure. Lando’s world was built on speed, danger, and fierce competition. It made sense that he’d be intense, that he might sometimes hold her a little too tightly.
Then came the nights when he’d disappear after races, unreachable, only to return hours later with excuses she could barely piece together. She’d lie in bed, watching the clock, her mind twisting in circles she’d thought she’d left behind. When he finally came back, he’d laugh off her questions, brushing them aside with an easy charm that was starting to feel a bit too practised.
“You worry too much, baby,” he’d say, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear with a smile that was all show and no substance.
She wanted to believe him. She’d fought so hard to let her guard down, to believe that love didn’t have to mean hurt. And for a while, she’d manage to push the doubt aside. After all, wasn’t it better to be with him, flaws and all, than to be haunted by ghosts she couldn’t let go of?
But the cracks widened. One evening, after a long dinner with friends, he pulled her aside, his voice low and edged with irritation. “I don’t like how you were looking at Oscar tonight,” he murmured, his eyes narrowing.
She blinked, caught off guard. “Oscar? He’s your teammate, Lando. We were just talking about your race.”
“I don’t care what you were talking about. You don’t need to give him that much attention.” The words were soft, but there was an edge beneath them that sent a chill through her.
It was like something inside her split open, letting old fears seep through the walls she’d so carefully built. She tried to laugh it off, to remind herself that Lando was nothing like the man from her past, but she couldn’t shake the feeling that she was slipping, that she was losing her footing on familiar, dangerous ground.
The excuses she made for him started to feel heavier, harder to carry. She was left questioning herself, wondering if maybe she was the problem, if somehow, her history had left her too damaged to hold onto happiness.
But deep down, beneath the doubt and the fear, she knew something was wrong. It wasn’t just her past haunting her this time; it was Lando. The way he seemed to light up her world only to cast shadows over it moments later. The way he made her feel seen and invisible all at once. She could feel herself changing again, growing cautious, careful.
And with each passing day, the Lando she’d once trusted felt more and more like a stranger.
But leaving? That felt impossible.
After all, who else would love her like he did?
No one would.
At least, that’s what her ex had said. It was what Lando insinuated, so it had to be true.
The words echoed in her mind on the quietest nights, when she lay beside him, his arm heavy over her waist, pinning her down in more ways than one. She’d stare at the ceiling, tracing the same lines over and over, feeling trapped in a strange in-between—a place where she was too afraid to stay but too afraid to leave.
When she’d first heard those words from her ex, they’d cut deep, etching a truth she carried like a scar: No one else will love you. No one will understand you the way I do. She’d almost forgotten how it felt to hear them again, subtle and soft, woven into Lando’s comments, his sideways glances, the way he’d sometimes pull her close and murmur, “You’re lucky I put up with you, you know.”
And, to her shame, she’d nod, a small part of her believing it. Maybe she was lucky, she thought, to be wanted by someone as thrilling as him. Who else would have taken her on whirlwind weekends, whisked her away to foreign cities, painted her life in colours she’d only dreamed of? Who else could make her feel this alive and desired? Surely, she should be grateful.
So she stayed, clinging to that fragile, half-real world they’d built together. She ignored the voices of her friends, who’d started to ask if she was okay, if she was happy. She brushed off their concerns with a laugh, told them Lando was just “passionate,” that he had a fire in him, that life with him was thrilling, intense. But the truth was that he didn’t bring just fire; he brought a burn that left her raw, exhausted, a shadow of the woman she’d thought she’d become.
The turning point came one rainy night, it hardly rained in Monaco, after an argument that had started small but escalated, Lando’s anger flaring as she’d barely managed to keep herself from shrinking under his words. He’d stormed out, slamming the door behind him, leaving her alone in the dim light, the sound of rain pattering against the window like a quiet reminder of everything she was losing.
As she sat there, a familiar sense of dread settled in her chest, mingling with the weight of words she’d heard too many times before. You’re lucky I’m here. No one else would deal with you. No one else would want you.
But this time, she felt something else—a flicker of defiance, an anger that had long been smothered by fear and doubt. She realised, with a clarity that shook her, that these words weren’t truths but weapons. Weapons used to keep her in place, to make her question herself until she couldn’t see straight.
Maybe she was more than what he saw in her. Maybe she was more than the broken woman her ex had left behind.
The rain outside was pouring harder now, pounding against the window, drowning out everything but her own heartbeat. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, feeling the weight lift, even if only slightly. She didn’t know if she had the strength to leave, but she knew she couldn’t stay—not like this.
Being with Lando felt like trying to set fire to rain.
Every time she reached for warmth, for comfort, her hands came away empty. Every promise he made seemed to evaporate just as quickly, leaving her cold and reaching for something that was never really there. Loving him was an exercise in futility, like trying to hold a flame in a storm, only to be drenched by the downpour of his moods, his shifting affections, his quiet, calculated disapproval.
He came home that night, soaked from the rain, his eyes darker than usual, his expression unreadable. She could smell the sharp tang of whiskey on him, the subtle tremor in his hands as he reached for her. She took a step back, though, bracing herself.
“Where were you?” she asked softly, not even expecting a real answer. She’d stopped expecting those a while ago.
He shrugged, a hint of a smirk tugging at his mouth. “Out,” he said, as if that was explanation enough. He glanced at her, his eyes sweeping over her with a mix of amusement and something colder, something she couldn’t place. “Why? Did you miss me?”
There was a time when she’d have laughed, played along, swallowed her doubts and insecurities just to keep things smooth between them. But that time was gone. Now, she felt nothing but a quiet emptiness where her laughter used to be.
“Maybe I did,” she replied, her voice barely above a whisper. “But not anymore.”
A flicker of something crossed his face—surprise, maybe, or the sting of wounded pride. He scoffed, leaning back, crossing his arms as he studied her. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
She swallowed, steadying herself. “It means I don’t want to be kept in the dark anymore. It means I’m done waiting for you to be someone you’ll never be. You talk about how lucky I am, Lando, but the truth is, I think I deserve better than… than this.” Her voice cracked, and she felt her face flush with both fear and defiance.
He laughed, a low, mocking sound that sent a chill through her. “You think you can do better than me?”
She met his gaze, her hands trembling as she fought to keep her voice steady. “Yes. I think I can.”
It was a small, simple statement, but as the words left her mouth, she felt something shift inside her, like a flame catching despite the rain. She knew he’d try to reel her back in, try to make her doubt herself, to make her think she’d never be enough for anyone else.
But she’d felt enough of the fire and the rain, the illusion of warmth that left her soaked and freezing. She was done waiting for him to change, done trying to be enough for someone who would never be satisfied.
He watched her for a long, silent moment, his face unreadable. Then, with a harsh, humourless laugh, he turned and walked away into his gaming room, leaving her standing alone in the dim light, the rain pounding against the windows like a heartbeat.
And as she stood there, she realised she’d already begun to let go. For the first time, she wasn’t afraid of the emptiness, the quiet. She was ready to face it, to feel the cold and the rain, knowing that someday she’d find her own warmth again.
This time, she wouldn’t look back.
She packed her bags, and unlike with her ex, she didn’t cry. She didn’t find an excuse to stay.
With each item she folded and placed into her suitcase, a sense of liberation washed over her. Clothes, books, the little mementos she’d collected during their whirlwind romance—all of it felt heavy, like anchors that had dragged her down into a darkness she no longer wished to inhabit. This time, she didn’t hesitate to let go.
The silence in the apartment felt almost deafening, but it was a comforting kind of silence, the kind that echoed with possibilities rather than the suffocating weight of past memories. She moved methodically, her hands steady and sure, and each zip of the suitcase felt like another step toward reclaiming herself.
When she finished, she stood in the middle of the living room, looking around at the remnants of their life together. It felt surreal, like a movie set she’d walked onto without ever really belonging. There were the photos of them at races, beaming smiles and happy moments frozen in time, and the framed poster of him in his racing gear, his helmet in hand, looking ready to conquer the world. But now, instead of warmth, those images filled her with a sense of finality. They were remnants of a story that had come to an end.
Her heart raced as she glanced toward the room he was in, half-expecting Lando to return and confront her, to wrap her in his familiar embrace and whisper sweet words that would lure her back into his web. But she shook the thought away. She wouldn’t fall for that crap again. This was her moment, the beginning of something new, and she refused to let fear creep back in.
Because she loved herself.
And in order to love herself, she had to choose herself.
So she did.
the end.
#f1#f1 imagine#f1 fanfic#mclaren#lando norris#lando norris fic#lando norris imagine#lando#lando norris x reader#lando norris angst#ln4 x y/n#ln4 x female reader#ln4#ln4 x reader#ln4 fic#ln4 imagine#formula one x oc#mclaren formula 1#mclaren f1#mclaren formula one#lando norris x you#lando norris x y/n#lando norris x oc#formula 1#formula one#formula one x y/n#formula one x you#formula one x reader#formula one imagine#formula one fanfiction
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One of my favourite things about the end of The S-Classes That I Raised novel (major spoilers ahead),
is the realisation that the reason why Yoojin and Hyunjae's relationship looks so much like a love story at times is because it actually, honestly is.
Like, we know that sctir is a novel about love since the beginning, that's not surprising. Yoojin's capability for loving monsters (both literal monsters and the human kind) and the power of that love is at the centre of the plot.
But by the time you get to the end, you realise - and the author confirms this themselves in their final Note - that Yoojin's relationship and love for 2 specific people was the true core of the story, and what allows him to save the world in the end:
One is, of course, Yoohyun.
And that love is absolute; you cannot say that it's inevitable, cause we know Yoojin had to make a choice when he was a child between Yoohyun and his parents, and he almost chose his parents, but from the moment he decided to love Yoohyun onward, then it was unconditional and eternal. It's the love of a brother, but also the love of a parent and a caretaker.
And the other person is Sung Hyunjae.
And that love is not unconditional nor inevitable or absolute at all. It's not something that can be taken for granted. We actually see, because of how it ended between them before the regression, and thanks to the White Bird's power of seeing possible futures, that there were so many timelines where Yoojin and Hyunjae would have never come to care about each other fully (tho they are always at least somewhat interested in each other, because their personalities are actually really compatible).
But the White Bird also sees that the only possible future where the world is saved is the one where they love and hold on to each other. And that is how the story goes!
So, just like a romance novel, the necessary end is the one where they both love each other and accept that love. And it's not easy to get there! It's a slow burn.
From meeting to getting to know each other, appreciating each other's skills and intelligence, finding out they have fun together but still not trusting each other, to working on building that trust.
They go from a strong but superficial mutual interest to actually caring about each other as people.
Yoojin has to go through the self-doubt of feeling inferior and fearing that Hyunjae will lose interest in him. Hyunjae has to learn to stop pushing Yoojin away because he doesn't know how to handle having someone he cares about so much, and also someone that cares about him, because nobody in the world (except in part Song Taewon) likes Sung Hyunjae as a person, he is only ever admired from afar.
And in the end, after going through ups and downs and a few "break-up arcs", they make it. They accept their own feelings and each other's feelings.
And that's when Yoojin makes the choice to use the power that the transcendents gave him at the very beginning of the novel, to save Hyunjae. Not the world. Not even Yoohyun! Just Sung Hyunjae!
Yeah, the whole "gather 50 S-Class people", the very thing that gives the novel its title. That is not a power that is used to save the world!! It was meant to, but Yoojin is "selfish", and he will always choose to save the people close to him first.
And being able to love someone so selfishly gives Yoojin the power to save the whole world, too. As a bonus! A reward. Just a side effect.
So yeah. Is it romantic love? No. Canonically, there's almost no romantic love in the whole novel.
But is it a love story?? Yeah. Absolutely it is.
#these are my midnight thoughts#have a lot of feelings for them#870 chapters of “why do they have so many romance tropes lmao”#to realise that it is 100% the whole point of the story#reading the side story now#happy to report hyunjae continues to be hopelessly and shamelessly in love#sctir#sctir spoilers#the s classes that i raised#s classes that i raised#s classes that i raised spoilers#the s ranks that i raised#my s class hunters#jinjae#han yoojin#sung hyunjae
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So, I have an honest question. Homelander is used to his bday being a huge deal, but what if the person he is interested in doesn't care about their own bday?
Like he has known them for a year, and they never celebrated their own bday nor ever hinted at it. How do you think he'd react?
Birthday Blues
Homelander x Gender Neutral Reader
Homelander hates when you keep secrets from him. But what’s merely a harmless fact to you pokes a sore spot that you never expected.
You hear him before you see him, eyebrow raising at the angry stomp of his footsteps. You’re finishing up the chapter of the book you’re reading and you hope he doesn’t have beef with you because then who knows when you’ll get back to it. You read as fast as you can, words almost blurring as you hastily scan the page. But alas, before you reach the last sentence, your book is cruelly ripped from you.
Homelander stands over your place on the couch, one hand perched on his hip while the other points your book at you as a replacement for his “oh so imposing” finger that he loves to wave at you. His brow is knitted and there’s no doubt that whatever has his feathers ruffled has something to do with you. You lean back and sigh, contemplating how long you should let him ramble before attempting to calm him down. He’s cute when he’s angry. You can live with a lecture when he looks so good doing it. Although you’re hardly feeling charitable at the moment due to him snatching your book like some kind of barbarian.
“Why didn’t you tell me it’s your birthday?!” He hisses at you, dropping your book with a thump as he places both hands jauntily on his hips. His jaw clenches as he waits for your answer.
You freeze.
Huh?
You don’t know what you expected but it certainly isn’t that. You had expected him to be fussy about you grabbing a drink with Starlight the other night or helping Ashley with some insane task he gave so he could watch her squirm. You missed a call from him earlier, that tends to set him off. You’d even believe he was feeling sensitive about you waking up before him and grabbing a coffee instead of a good morning kiss. Any of those would be easy to assume. But no, he’s apparently worked up that you didn’t tell him your birthday.
You figured Homelander isn’t a fan of birthdays. He certainly seems cynical about his own. He hasn’t told you the whole story but when he grits his teeth at his birthday obligations instead of basking in the cheers of the crowd, you can easily make the assumption that it’s a sore subject. You don’t have any hang ups about your own birthday but it just never seemed like a big deal to you. It’s just a day. Perhaps too many sneak attacks from the singing staff at restaurants traumatized you. Maybe it’s because birthday cake is always too sickly sweet. Or possibly you just don’t feel like celebrating the passage of time. You never tell people and people rarely ask.
Yet, you can tell by the petulant twist of his mouth that he’s not just angry but hurt that you didn’t share it with him.
“I’m…sorry. I just don’t really think about it that much.” You reply with a confused shrug. His mouth twitches and you know he’s not satisfied with that answer. He’s taking this awfully personally and you can’t for the life of you figure out why. It’s just a day.
“Are you trying to fuck with me? So next time we argue you can bring up what a horrible boyfriend I am for ignoring your birthday! You gonna gossip about it over cocktails with fucking Starlight?” He spits out her name like a curse. You want to roll your eyes but you don’t fancy Homelander flying you to the top of a skyscraper and leaving you there like the last time you tried that. You sigh and reach out to take his hand. He jerks it away petulantly for a moment but when you reach for it again he allows your touch.
“That would make me a pretty shitty partner. I’m not trying to play games with you. I’ve just never really had strong feelings about my birthday. That’s all. I promise.” You squeeze his hand and some of the tension leaves his shoulders. You rub the back of his hand with your thumb, enjoying the feel of the buttery soft leather of his glove. He pouts.
“I’m not a bad boyfriend.” He huffs. You gently tug his hand and guide him until he’s laying on the couch with his head in your lap. It only takes a few strokes of his hair before he deflates like a balloon. He turns to snuggle his face into your chest.
“I’m not.” He sighs into your shirt. You shush him gently.
“You’re my good boy. I know you wouldn’t forget on purpose. You take such good care of me. But why do you care so much about my birthday?” You switch from stroking his hair to rubbing soothing circles on his back. He’s easily mollified today and it further confirms your suspicions that his feelings were deeply wounded. He desperately needs reassurance when that happens. It’s sweet.
“Did you know that my birthday is fake? Corporate decided on it. I don’t even have one since I was…” He trails off and your heart squeezes painfully. He’s cagey about his past but every so often new details will slip out and it horrifies you every time. You continue to sooth him even as your stomach twists unpleasantly. “But you do have one and you don’t even care! Do you know how fucking spoiled you are?”
You ignore the jab although your hackles rise. Poking his ego now would prove disastrous. So you swallow your pride and continue to let him vent.
“I don’t want you keeping things like that from me. You’re mine and I deserve to know things about you. How can I trust you when you won’t even tell me your fucking birthday.” He huffs and you can feel him stiffen up as he works himself back up into an angry spiral. He nips at your stomach hard enough to bruise and you tug on his hair harshly as a reprimand.
“This isn’t me intentionally keeping some secret from you. I don’t tell anybody.” You pause briefly as an idea hits you. “But…maybe it’s your birthday today too.” You answer and he pulls himself away to fix you with a bemused glare. His brow twitches as he processes what you said
“I mean, if you don’t know the actual day. Then technically every day can be your birthday. It’s like Schrodinger's Cat. Screw corporate, pick your own birthday.” You give his shoulder a little shake and your heart lifts when the corner of his mouth tilts into a little smile.
“It’s my birthday today too then. Now you have to celebrate.” He gives you a smug grin and you ruffle his hair fondly. The hurt still lingers. This is a mere bandage over the leaking wound you know still remains. But if you can ease his burden even a little, you’re happy to do so. Even if it means making a big deal out of your birthday.
“The mighty Homelander sharing the spotlight with a humble human like me? It’s pretty scandalous.” You tease and he turns his head to kiss the sore spot where he bit you. He nuzzles into you one last time before sitting up. He leans in to rub his nose against yours, desperately seeking intimacy in such a vulnerable moment.
“No spotlight,” He whispers. “Just you and me.”
You smile and pull him into a chaste kiss. He whines at the brevity of it and you place another cheeky kiss on the tip of his nose.
“Just you and me.”
He grins and his eyes fill with mischief as he meets your gaze.
“That means it’s time for your birthday spankings” He reaches out to swat you when you bolt with a wild laugh, careening and slipping around his apartment in your socks as he gives chase. You realize as you shriek at his games that maybe birthdays aren’t so bad after all…at least as long as no one sings to you.
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Your love story and the movie it resembles
With your future partner
ever wondered how would your love story be with your future spouse? and what movie would it be similar to? I will be honest as someone who romanticizes love this question as kept me awake on many nights and has made me daydream a lot. SO as a result I have decided to make a pac on this topic. I hope you enjoy this reading and support my blog so that I can come up with more interesting pick a cards.
These pictures belong to their rightful owners.
please like and reblog, I worked hard on this one
Picture 1
Okay so as soon as i started this reading i got the message that most people who chose this picture may not have had an actual relationship in a sense that you might have felt as if something was always lacking or you may not have been treated right in a relationship. And i do see that you have a unexplainable fear that maybe the person you will fall in love with wont fall for you? or you may doubt their affection for you as you seem to have severe trust issues. You may be the kind of person who doubts love but is also dreaming about it. you may show as if you don't believe in love or that money matters more for you but you know deep down that is not true.
I also sense that this group is divided into two subgroups as this group seem to have two similar yet different love stories.
group one : you guys may be a Virgo, cancer or Sagittarius sun moon or rising. You guys can have medium to short curly hair. you may have a mole on your arm or right shoulder. You may have a small friend group consisting 3-4 people including you. one of your friends can be of different race or religion. Some of you may be in high school or 1st-2nd year of collage. Pumpkin and grapes may be significant for you.
your love story : There may be a sense of "saving the other" in your love story. you know how a person is suffering and the other person comes into their life and saves them that is the vibe that I am getting from your love story. Your future spouse may enter you life when you will be dire need of help or when you will be suffering or vice versa. You may be the damsel in distress, but i see that You wont ask your future spouse for help intentionally. You are someone who wont ask for help no matter how much they are suffering and your future spouse is someone who WANTS to help other no matter what but they have been used by a lot of people because of this. They are well aware of the fact that people only approach them because of their personal benefit and this makes them quite upset. But but but i also sense that they would want to help not financially but emotionally. They would want to help you with everything they can and this may be the one of the majors reasons why you will fall for them. They will help you find purpose in your life again. They will make you fall in love with life.
SO the movie that resembles your love story is EK VILLAIN. This is an Indian movie and I would suggest you to watch it. i wont spoil it for you if you have not watched it yet, but leave out the parts that don't resonate with you.
Group two : You guys can be a Taurus, Leo or Aries sun moon or rising. you may have a mole of your back or on one side of your neck. You guys may have long dark hair or dark brown hair that reaches past your armpits. You may have a fear of lizards or any kind of reptile. i sense that some of you may be studying business or you plan to start you own soon? You may have gold jewellery that you wear regularly.
Your love story : As I said earlier both these groups will have a similar yet different love story and the sense of "saving the other" is also present in this group but the only difference is that you will be the one who will save your future spouse/partner. They may be really popular or into music because i see that they have a good singing voice. You guys can also work in the same field or profession. I see that you guys will encourage them to give their best when they may feel low or when they may doubt themselves. I see that you will be their biggest supporter and this will make them fall deeper for you. They will admire how passionate you are about what you do. If you are in a creative field, they may use you as their muse. I also sense that they will be writing songs and poems for you because they seem to have a talent for writing. You guys will work together and earn a lot of money and fame.
So the movie that resembles your love story is AASHIQUI 2. This movies was released in 2013.
Noticed how the actress in both the movies is same? so you may have something in common with her.
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Picture 2
This is the group of misunderstood people lol. I see that people always try to find flaws in you or blame you for the things that have nothing to do with you. But i also sense that you someone who jumps into conclusions and overthinks their situation. Things may not be as they appear. You are someone who has lost a lot of people that were close to you and you don't want to go through the same pain again, so as a result you have put a wall between you and other. And now you don't care if people misunderstand you or spread rumours about you. I also sense that you are independent, you don't like asking anyone for help, You would rather do the things by yourself than ask for help.
Okay so for the people who chose this picture I see that and your future partner may not have a good first impression of each other or there may be some past experiences that you both share that are not so ideal. Or you guys may meet in an environment that is not to ideal for a first meeting? but whatever it may be I sense that you guys will remember your first meeting and laugh out loud.
Do you guys have a one sided love story or have you ever been in this situation? because I see that most of you have liked somebody who already had a girlfriend/boyfriend or somebody they were talking to OR I see that you had a huge crush on one of your friends and he/she were already into somebody so you thought is would be better to forget them.
I am getting friends to strangers to friends to lovers. Its really complex and complicated. But yes it seems as if somebody else was involved in your love story and no I am not talking about third party situation. its more of a "yes I like this person and I am talking to them" from their side and "you are my friend and I like you but wont tell you because you like somebody else so I wont tell you" OR "yes I like you but wont tell you because I don't want to ruin our friendship" from your side. But I sense that they will realise their feelings a lot later and when you wont be talking to them. I also sense that you may move away from them to forget them or you may even move to another country for job or education.
But we all know how the universe works in strange ways that you may have never considered. So you will end up meeting them again but in a different way as compared to before. And they will be the one to express their love for you and will do everything to win your heart.
So the movie that resembles your love story is KUCH KUCH HOTA HAI and a little bit of DDLJ. Both these movies have the same acter and actress. But the plot is not same its similar with slightly different storyline.
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Picture 3
Some of you may also be interested in Picture 1
Are you sure you are interested in this love reading? because your energy is telling me otherwise. I am shocked to see you reading this because it seems as you are starting to hate the word love, and honestly I don't think you are at fault because if I was going through the same things that you have been through/are going through, I would hate it too. You have experienced love and I am not talking about romantic love, I am talking about platonic love. The kind of love you are supposed to receive from your family and friends. And now as a result of that, your perception of love is completely messed up.
But I have a good news for you, you have been blessed in money sector of your life and this abundance in money sector will be the love you yearn for. Now you are only focusing on your work and career, you are taking all the required steps to achieve your dreams and goals. And while you are focused on this sector of your life you wont notice how the universe will bless your love life with a partner that will move mountain for you. And the most beautiful thing is, YOU NEVER HAD TO ASK FOR IT. yes there were times when you cried yourself to sleep because you could not feel loved but unknowingly it all made you stronger.
Now lets talk about your love story with your future, So as I have already talked about how you will meet them when you will focusing on yourself and your dreams. And I also see that they will be the first one to fall in love and realise their feelings. And the most interesting thing is they will make all the efforts needed to prove their love for you. They wont approach you with a love offer first and wont shove their feelings into your face as in "Hey i love you, lets get married" no it wont be like that, in fact they will approach with the offer you helping you or being your friend first. They will admire how sweet and caring you are despite the things you have been through, You will fill them with inspiration and hope that there are still nice people in this world who make this world a better place with their existence. They will support you in you work and offer new ideas. Some of you are really intuitive so you will know who person may be or will be. Your future partner will admire the way you handle tough situations and problems thrown your way with ease. You are someone with hard exterior and really soft interior and this will intrigue your future partner as it is really hard to find genuine people with good intentions these days.
You love story gives me the trope of black cat and golden retriever energy with you being the black cat here and them being the golden retriever. Its honestly so cute!! and I am so happy for you guys. You guys deserve the world. okie I think i am getting distracted, so lets get back to the reading, Your love story will be something that will remind people of a fairy-tale.
So the movie/movies that resemble your love story is RAMAIYA VASTAVAIYA 2013 and GHAJINI 2008. Yes as i said this wont resonate 100% with your love story but there will be similarities.
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#pick a card#tarot#spirituality#tarotcommunity#pick a photo#tarot reading#divination#pick a pile#pick a picture#pick an image#future spouse#future lover#free tarot#free readings#tarot readings#tarot deck#tarot cards#tarot witch#tarotwisdom#tarotblr#tarot commissions#tarot collection#spiritual knowledge#movies#bollywood#oracle
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Bro..I love your blog already
Can you please do CoD (Ghost, soap, nikto, roach, könig, price, Gromsko(if you write for him) with male reader who has mouth like mileena from mortal combat 😵 you know..sharp ass teeth, Long slimy tongue and shit
Can be nsfw if you want👀
MALE READER WITH A MOUTH LIKE MILEENA
(Headcanons/ short story?)
People shown: Ghost, Soap, Nikto, Roach, König, Price,Gromsko. As per requested.
Warnings: body/face disfigurement?,small mention of experiment and torture, mentions of slight depression/ mental breakdowns.
Themes: fluff, slight angst, comfort, no nsfw for now ain't feelin the groove can be read with mutual or start of a romantic relationship. Just wanna be held and comforted fr fr 😞😞✋🤚
Note: I never wrote about Gromsko but I do know him. Had to do a research into him. So this is my interpretation of Gromsko hope I got him right.
Also these Headcanons ARE FUCKING LONG. so I hope you saved room for breakfast, lunch, dinner, appetizers, and dessert with complimentary drinks too.
Also this is kinda rushed? I didn't have time to proofread this. So like. Yeah..
You (M/N) had a very disfigured mouth a big slash across your lower face. Making it look like your lower face have been burnt in half. Showing sharp teeth protruding out accompanying it was your long sharp tounge. Your face adorned with scars and bruises you managed to collect through your time in the military. But when you had this type of injury..Where your mouth looks so horribly scarred you had to leave the military.
Due to how long you've been in the military. And how you've been tortured and experimented on making your face look like..this. You hated it. But you wanted to be back in the military for your own personal reasons.
Now since your back in the military you've kept your face hidden. You didn't want your new team to look at you in disgust and horror. They always used to be so scared. But it's a new team! You just have to keep your mask on and none would be the wiser.
GHOST
-Ever since Ghost saw you he always felt something was..off about you. It's not like you kept to yourself no you were sociable sometimes.
-But he kept his doubts about you to himself. You were a soldier. And just because he felt off doesn't mean he had to treat you differently
-He wasn't prodding or asking you about why you kept wearing you mask.
- You have your problems on why you wore your mask, He has his problems. It's like a little understanding why you kept your mask on 24/7.
- Then that one faithful day when you both were paired on a mission and you were caught by an enemy dragged to a building.
- Ghost was quick to follow you. He was nearby and saw you get dragged.
-He made his way silently and quickly through the building. Slipping in through a cracked window as he searched around cautiously.
-A bang could be heard, then a scream. Then silence.. That wasnt good. He swiftly ran over to where he heard the scream. And he found you..you weren't dead no. The enemy was. A big gnash on their neck as they slowly bled on the cold floor.
-And you were there. Coiled into a ball quietly sobbing, shaking your head. He glanced at the bleeding enemy one more time before he ran over to you immediately making his presence known as he gently grabbed your arms covering you face.
-When he pried your hands off and saw your face. He only sighed his eyes softening in small realization. Before he hugged you. As you continue to sob. He knew why you covered your face now... And he won't hate you for that.
SOAP
- He immediately took an interest towards you when he first saw you for the first couple weeks.
- He would stalk you for a bit. Realizing you never took your mask off..like Ghost.
- He didn't mind as well. Maybe you had a similar reason to Ghost. Although that didn't stop him to ask you to take off your mask.
- You took it well. Really just teasing him that you totally would show Soap your face.(you wouldn't, never)
- That only made Soap think that you would someday show your face.
- You both grew close. Always hanging out, making jokes, hell even sleeping in the same room.
- Although he would keep pestering you about your mask.
- You trusted him deeply and he trusted you.
- Then one day you pulled Soap in a closet.. Although he was a bit suspicious asking you slyly why you brought him here. Before you shut him up.
- It was serious.. you trusted him so so deeply.. maybe..he wouldn't judge you if you showed him..your face? And that's what you did. You explained why you called him here. Hus face bellowing with excitement. As you slowly took off your mask showing. Your face.
- You looked worriedly at him. Soap had gone silent. And he was just staring wide eyed...oh no..no..no.. that wasn't the reaction you wanted.
- You tried to explain..or try to convince Soap to not make you look like a freakish fool. But Soap just..ran out of the closet.. leaving you there dumbstruck..
- It was only later in the night. Specifically midnight. You couldn't forget how Soap looked at you it was heart wrenching. That was it. He thinks you look like a freak now.
- You hold your face in your hands. Sobbing about your friend.. that now thinks your disgusting.
- Then 3 knocks came at your door. You dawned your mask wiping away your tears before opening the door. Before you even react Soap pushes you in your room and closes the door.
- You don't respond. He whispers something to you then he removes your mask. Making you panic..Then he holds your face. Gentle and soft as he looks at you with a solemn smile.
- "M/N..." He whispers your name again as he rubs your lower face. Holding you in his arms as he whispers praises.. and apologies. For you.
NIKTO
- He wouldn't care about you
- He really didn't like or want any more new recruits. He found new people annoying. So when you first bumped into Nikto. He gave you a glare before he shoved past you.
- When he overheard people talking about how you never removed your mask. He got slightly curious so whenever you were nearby he would watch you. And they were right. You never took off your mask.
- One day he got frustrated with you. Do you think you're special for not taking off your mask?
You think you are cool? He seethed.
- Although he was a brute to you he was at least modest well.. modest to not pull your mask out of your face Infront of your teammates.
- Instead he cornered you somewhere private. Gruffly asking then commanding you to take off your mask.
- When you disagreed he ripped it off your face. And saw..your.. face. His eyes slightly widened.
- And when you started to panic trying to grab your mask while hiding it. Til' you eventually snatched it out of his hands when he was frozen with shock. You wore your mask and ran out.
- That's when Nik knew he fucked up. He knew he needed to apologize. So he went to search for you after he processed what happened now the guilt weighing down on him every minute he couldn't find you.
- When he finally found you probably hiding off somewhere, most likely avoiding Nik. He sat down next to you. Unsure how to start with his apology.
- When he finally blurted it out. Looking at you with obvious guilt in his eyes. But he knew sorry wasn't enough. So he took his mask off himself. Showing his own scars and bruises. Scooting himself closer to you still with that apologetic look.
- You talked for a while maybe about how you got your scar or not. About anything else.
ROACH
-Hes quiet around you. Once he first saw you he didn't really react much. It's just a new recruit nothing special.
- You never takes off your mask? Nothing special to him.
- He kept to himself you kept to yourself.
- he was just crawling around one day. Hiding up in small spaces and just idk stayed there.
- And when you bursted in closing the door behind you. He hid himself further in that corner he was in. He's not confronting you..nuh uh..
- He watched you stand there for a few minutes before you took of your mask. Showing off your lower face. Which made him go closer to see.
- Woah.. He watched you intently without your mask. Taking in every detail. He thought you looked cool. Didn't understand why you hid your face. Looked kinda sick tbh.
- That's when you felt someone watching you and you lock eyes with Roach. Your eyes widening hastily grabbing your mask and running off. Leaving Roach there with his thoughts. He must've understood enough you don't like being seen with your mask down.
- So the next few days. He watched you looking at you with a knowing look. While you looked back nervous and full of embarrassment?.
- And one of those days he was watching you. He walked up to you without saying anything and handed you a piece of ripped paper only reading
" You look cooler without your mask ".
KÖNIG
- He raised an eyebrow when he saw you. Almost already knowing you were the type of person who would keep him mask on.
- Not like he cares or anything
- He would though keep an eye on you. Just in case.. Not like he's interested in seeing your face or anything.
- From watching to discreetly following you around. Just to make sure okay? It's nothing else.
- When he was following you today. He watched from the side when a few other soldiers with the same rank as you walked in beside you. Poking and prodding on why you have to hude your face in a mask? Did you look sexy bad you had to hide it?
- When you ignored or scolded them. They quickly got annoyed with you and tried removing you mask. Even when you tried to shove and fight them off they would eventually take off your mask anyway.
- König knows he should stop he was about to when they finally managed to take off your mask. And they all backed away from you in disgust evidently on their face.
- If you got angry or sad they would just back away from you again. They don't care you looked disgusting. If you tried to grab your mask from someone they'd back away from you while screaming at you to get away from them.
- König didn't notice your face. Well not yet anyway. He made his presence known in a booming voice as he dismissed the people who just assaulted you. They're still holding your mask
- You try to hide your face but. That didn't work. Even when König saw you. He saw your face. His face softening when he saw you.
- He walks up to you. Going on his knees to take your hands off your face. As he looks up at you softly. Holding your hands in his.
- He shouldn't judge. He didn't really care. You are his soldier and you took his interest. He talked to you softly sprinkling in praises about your face while he tries to comfort you.
PRICE
- He knew about your face. It was already mentioned in your information when he read your file. He was the one who let you in 141 anyway. And he didn't mind
- He had seen lots of injuries all varying in scales. So he didn't really mind your face
- Wether you knew that Price knew about your face or not. He would be the first to call you everytime in his office to talk.
- Just discreetly talking about you. Maybe get you to open up to him. Which would then eventually lead to you opening up to the rest of the team.
- He wanted you to feel comfortable and feel part of the team. Always.
- He told you he knew about your face. Any reactions from you would just let him make you sit down as he tries to be your personal therapist. Assuring you that no one would judge you. If anyone did. He would make sure that they would be punished.
GROMSKO
- He would eye you at first before trying to impress you. Well trying to impress all the new recruits. Always showing off how good he is in what he does.
- When he noticed you never got rid off your mask. Not even talking to anyone why you take off your mask. He had a great idea.
- His first plan with you was to get you to take off your mask to him. Just so he could show off that he was the lucky guy to see your face.
- So he made himself get comfortable with you. Hanging around you, talking to you, trying to scope you out so he could get your trust and take your mask off around him. Maybe he could get a sweet picture so he could have proof.
- He would talk to you alot. Almost everyday actually, he would make himself hang around you. Maybe even begging to be in the same missions with you. Just so he could....why'd he hang out with you again??.. ahh he forgot!
- He just suddenly.. started wanting to be close friends with you. Forgetting his original reason.
-That was when he only remembered his initial reason why he was friends with you. When you pulled him somewhere private and you asking him if he wanted to see your face.
- He got excited. Even more when he remembers why you guys were friends. But a slight guilt stung him when he remembers why. His first intentions were.. really selfish. But now he was really fond of you.
- But he nodded and when you took of your mask seeing your mouth. Of course he got shocked and to your dismay backed away from you.
- He cleared his throat when he realized that wasn't really.. a good reaction really..
- So he moved closer to you. Admiring your sharp teeth and mouth.
- He even asked you to show your tounge. Just as impressive.
- He grew even more and more fond of you. You let him touch your lower face. He takes off his own as well. Showing his face. As he held your face.
- He whispered something polish about you looking so unique.. so special?...
- Then he didn't know why but. He just..I dont know.. pressed his lips on yours.. Not like it meant anything..or something.. (it totally meant something)
#call of duty x male reader#call of duty modern warfare x male reader#cod mw2 x male reader#gay#john soap mactavish x male reader#cod x male reader#cod x reader#Gromsko#gromsko x reader#Gromsko x male reader#könig x male reader#simon ghost riley x male reader#ghost x male reader#price x male reader#captain john price x male reader#gary roach sanderson#roach x male reader#cod nikto x male reader#Nikto#nikto x reader#Headcanons#mortal kombat
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Ekko and Jinx's History: A Simple Comment
So I read something the other day talking about how fans are making Ekko and Jinx's relationship romantic and not all male and female characters HAVE to be romantically involved. I agree with this. I'll go so far as to say that this is true for any character of any gender. In my own writing (with my original characters) I rarely have romantic undertones. Mostly just friends being friends. While I get the allure of the romantic chase, of most people we deal with in life we aren't connecting to them romantically. Friends are friends.
That said, this is not the case with Ekko and Jinx. From Ekko's release in 2015 there has always been some romantic undertones with Jinx. Riot has always been a bit mysterious about what his relationship is with Jinx. Ekko even has a line in the game where he says:
The foundation had been laid long before Arcane was released in 2021.
Between 2015 and 2021 (when Arcane was released), a lot of official art and such dropped hints about SOMETHING going on between them. Much like Jinx being Vi's sister. You have to remember that this was originally a secret. It was Ghostcrawler who finally confirmed fan theories, even though he tried to walk it back later. Oops! Ha, ha!
(An image from 2015)
To add to the mystery, on both of their official pages, Ekko is listed as connected to Jinx and Jinx is listed as connected to Ekko. However, at no point does Riot explain how they're connected. Their stories don't mention the other at all. So this means that some things were planned, but they weren't ready to reveal. I'm still of a mind that they were waiting to use Arcane as a vehicle to get into Jinx's history and how that intersected with Ekko and Vi. Before Arcane, we knew very little about Jinx and how she ends up the way she does.
Then, before Arcane came out we got this little nugget in Legends of Runeterra:
Remember, this is 100% from Riot themselves. Not the fans. Riot laid the seeds down and it was the fans who picked up on it and ran. I doubt anyone would have ever thought there was something between Ekko and Jinx without Riot dropping hints. By the time we got to Arcane Season 1, the train was already in motion.
Let's not even forget the insane number of Jinx references in the True Damage video they released in 2020. Generally it wasn't odd to see Ekko and there would be some sort of Jinx reference somewhere. That wasn't true for Jinx until recently.
After Arcane, Riot themselves has been dropping hints like crazy. Jinx has been putting Ekko's hourglass symbol on stuff. League Brazil did a huge Twitter AMA with Star Guardian Ekko and Jinx. Jinx goes to the Grammys with Ekko.
Another official Ekko and Jinx moment. Check out her shirt!
And let's not forget this one for the Billboard Music Awards:
They went to the event together!
So...while I see people saying that the fans were to blame for Jinx and Ekko being romantically involved, it should be pointed out that this is all Riot's doing. The best part is that the fans have been largely receptive to their efforts in promoting the couple. Riot has waited a long time to be able to say what they want to say about them.
And if there is any doubt about where they're going with them as a couple, let's just remember this cover for the art book for Arcane:
Another official piece done by Riot and Fortiche themselves.
Sorry for the long post, but I thought it was important to point out that it's not the fans who set this up. It'll be interesting to see where this all goes, but based on their track record so far, it should be clear where the end game is headed.
Thanks for reading!
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my general Side Order thoughts:
I don't have much of anything groundbreaking to say. I haven't publicly said much in relation to side order in the first place, i don't want to build up crazy expectations, and I've seen much of the fanbase making solid theories anyways. also there has been a lot less information compared to ROTM which is great, I don't want to be able to predict the whole story before the game comes out. I'd rather be surprised like i was with octo expansion! here I just want to put out my thoughts real quick so people know where I stand and that yes i am aware of the Hints and Foreshadowing
Marina's quote at the end of her interview in Splatune 3 is relevant of course, gives us a sense of what this whole world of order is. But did she build it this whole digital simulation, or was it something she found? (mix of both perhaps? found it, contributed to parts of it and it went out of her control?)
Mem cakes, agent 8, cerebral theming...very interested where this all goes. love all the references to OE keep em coming
People have been talking about this already, and the foreshadowing was acknowledged back in haikara walker in 2018. the hat logos on dedf1sh and paul gotta be connected to this thing.
It'd be a huge waste for a more grown-up paul to not show up in s3, either as someone mentioned by Acht or for him to make some sort of musical return post side order.
Glen fiddler has always been interesting to me (in that i anticipated he would become plot relevant somehow) with how he was fully 3d modeled in his sunken scroll. im not 100% on if hes gonna be in side order but the copy machine connections in side order (the fish skeletons in splatoween, also the recent poster?) are sus
^has to be agent 4. of course. seeing enemy inklings instead of enemy octolings sounds awesome btw
I'm expecting the inkopolis square hub to come back as a thing you can access post-game. pearl and marina splatfest concerts
iso padre please come back to me (maybe in said inkopolis square hub world)
who the fuck are you. not a mantis shrimp, looks too soft to be a crustacean to me. closest thing i can compare this to is a black dragonfish nymph but i kind of doubt it. maybe it is some guy who was created to manage things, like CQ to the deepsea metro?
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Who's Your Barber?
request: based on this.
pairing: spencer reid x reader
summary: “you move fast, kid.” he turned to spencer who looked like he was on the verge of passing out. “letting Y/N cut your hair without going on a first date.”
genre: fluff
word count: 0.8k
author's notes: hello! i'm back with another spencer reid tooth-rotting fluff without plot. this was based on a request sent to me. i hope you'll love this!
“DO YOU THINK MY HAIR’S TOO LONG?”
You looked up from where you were working on a pile of paperwork from a recent case only to stare at a pouting Spencer.
Cute, you thought.
“Why?” You asked, now facing the man in front of you who was busy fretting over his hair. “Is it bothering you?”
“No, not really.” He mumbled. “I just—I don’t know. I want to keep it this way because it’s always been kind of on the longer side but I also want to try cutting it short.”
A bit shy from his admission, Spencer started fiddling with the hair tie on his wrist, obviously not that comfortable implying that he did care about his looks even for a small bit.
You almost cooed at how adorable he’s being for a grown man.
“Okay,” You prodded him again, wanting to make sure you understood what he was trying to say. “So, you wanna try a new haircut but you’re not sure about it. Well, I can help you with that.”
Spencer looked up from where he was playing with his hair tie and scrunched up his brow in question.
“How?”
You instantly blushed at what you were about to suggest when you noticed Spencer being all for it. The thing about Spencer is that he’s a great listener as much as he likes to talk. Coming from a household where he never got to have a good companion unless his mom was doing okay, Spencer knew what it felt like when no one wanted to listen to whatever it was one has to say. With all your doubts starting to vanish at Spencer’s obvious interest, you shared your thoughts.
“Well,” You decided to share. It’s not like you would recount to him an embarrassing childhood story. That’s a story meant for another day. “I may or may not have worked at my aunt’s salon over the summer back when I was in high school. I wasn’t a hairstylist but learned a thing or two.”
Spencer’s eyes widened in wonder. You no longer regretted sharing your experience and were sure he was about to share a tangent on hairstyling in typical Dr. Spencer Reid fashion.
“Archaeologists discovered that cutting our hair and styling it have both been practiced by human beings as early as the Ice Age.” Spencer babbled. “Also, they said that people’s social class, age, ethnicity, race, and genetics determined the style of their hair throughout history even up to the late 20th century.”
You grinned at Spencer’s info dump and ruffled his hair, to which he scrunched his nose.
“So, Reid,” You replied. “When are we gonna cut your hair?”
“What, did you join a boy band?”
Everyone around the table started giggling and smiling as soon as Hotch directed the question at Spencer, as your cheeks reddened. Unfortunately for Spencer, you being a former employee at your aunt’s salon certainly did not do you wonders. Because what was supposed to be a trim here and there became a short haircut for him, quite shorter than what he has envisioned, he shared with you.
You almost dug yourself a hole right then and there.
But apparently, Spencer liked it enough—loved it even—to not hate you for cutting his hair too short. It’s fortunate—for him and especially for you who gets to see him in his new hair every day—that Spencer was pretty. He looked good both in long and short hair.
However, with Hotch asking him that question, you were sure Spencer would hate you for cutting it wrongly.
“No?” Spencer replied as his brows crinkled. You breathed a sigh of relief with his answer, which Rossi didn’t fail to notice.
You were about to head out when Hotch just announced, “Wheels up in 30.” When you heard Rossi speak to Spencer
“I like your hair, kid.” You almost smiled until Rossi questioned him. “Who’s your barber? Maybe I’ll get myself the same haircut.”
As if it couldn’t get any worse, you heard Morgan join in on the conversation, like both he and Rossi knew something you don’t. Spencer probably didn’t know what that something was too.
“Yeah, pretty boy. Who’s your barber?”
Spencer looked like he had swallowed a frog and he had seen a ghost with how comical he looked right now.
It seemed Spencer knew what Rossi and Morgan were trying to imply in their prodding.
“It seems to me,” Rossi continued. “It was our lovely Y/N who cut his hair.”
At this, your eyes widened as Derek smirked.
“You move fast, kid.” He turned to Spencer who looked like he was on the verge of passing out. “Letting Y/N cut your hair without going on a first date.”
Spencer likes you back?
As in more than friends?
Non-platonic?
Spencer likes you back!
“Shut up!” Spencer screeched.
“Let’s leave the kids alone.” Rossi appeased Spencer while looking at you. “They have a date to plan.”
Spencer sputtered out as both men chuckled while moving out.
“So, Reid.” You simpered. “Where are we going for our first date?”
#criminal minds#criminal minds fandom#criminal minds fanfiction#criminal finds fanfic#criminal minds fic#spencer reid#spencer reid fandom#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid fic#spencer reid fluff#spencer reid angst#spencer reid smut#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid drabble#spencer reid blurb#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x y/n#spencer reid x you#david rossi#derek morgan#aaron hotchner#tooth rotting fluff#fluff without plot
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☆◞: IM ALWAYS JUST A DOOR AWAY ✧ SPENCER REID
SPENCER REID X FEM READER
SUMMARY: when you moved in to your new apartment, you never imagined your neighbor, spencer reid, would be such a nightmare. he wasn’t your favorite guy. in fact, you hated him. unfortunately for you, you can never seem to escape him. the universe clearly has other plans for you two.
WARNINGS: mentions of alcohol and alcohol consumption in some chapters, angsty, arguing, spencer is kind of (definitely) an asshole, kissing, cursing, somewhat darker plot points as story progresses (this is my first ever full story fanfic! so it might be bad…) this will also be 10 parts so yayyy
GENRE: enemies to lovers, fluff, angst
⋆·˚ ༘ *
chapter 1 : a nightmare..
✎Was it even possible to hate someone so much that even the thought of them made your blood boil?
You never thought that was even possible. You were always trying to see the best in people, even if they were rude to you. That all changed when you moved next door to Spencer Reid.
Spencer Reid
The bane of your existence.
You had moved into your first apartment alone, with the help of your parents loaning some money and your waitressing job, when you had the unpleasant experience of meeting him.
God, he was so stuck up and pretentious. Getting to know him might have been your biggest regret.
The first day you met him, he immediately gave you an attitude.
You weren’t all that familiar with this area, so you took it upon yourself to try and make friends with the neighbors.
As you walk up to the door and knock, you become excited at the potential of a new friendship.
Behind the door, you can hear a quiet, muffled voice and some shuffling before it’s opened to reveal a rather tall man looking down at you.
“Yes?” He sounded a bit annoyed, yet you continued your introduction.
“Hi, I’m your new neighbor! My name is-“
“Cool, I’m really busy, and if it isn’t important, don’t bother me.” The man quickly shuts the door.
You were so puzzled and quite upset.
Who just shuts the door on someone’s face like that?
-‘๑’-
However, after some time, you forgave it. Everyone has bad days; everyone is very busy at some point. Maybe he was just overwhelmed, right?
That was until you saw him again, in the parking lot of the apartments.
You found out his name was Spencer Reid from some other neighbors. This only made you more interested in getting to know him, or at least being civil with each other.
You were getting out of your car after returning home from work when you saw him coming down the stairs to the parking lot. Trying to be friendly, you waved and smiled.
“Hello!” Your expression was bright and kind, as always. Something Spencer never seemed to return. He visibly rolled his eyes at you, rushing to his car.
Did I do something wrong? Did I say something to offend him? Do I have something stuck in my teeth
Your thoughts ran wild, doubting every interaction you have had with anyone before. Were you just annoying? You barely had a conversation with the man; how could he find you annoying?
Maybe he just sucked?
-‘๑’-
For months, your interactions were the same. You’d attempt to be friendly, and he’d quickly (and quite rudely) shut you down. You had convinced yourself he was just a busy man until you were proven right. He just sucked.
Friday, 10:49 pm
Music played throughout your living room as you unwinded on your couch. The weekend had just begun, so you decided to finally relax. Work had been extra shitty today, and you felt you deserved a break. You sat on your couch, reading a book, as your favorite songs played when you heard a knock at the door.
Who could be knocking so late?
Placing your book down and quickly turning the music off, you rush to answer the door.
As it opened, you'd never been more confused to see Spencer Reid standing in front of you.
“Uh, hi? Is something wro-”
“Can you turn the music down?” He seemingly snaps, not even letting you finish your sentence.
“Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to have it so lo-”
“If you’re going to blare your music, you shouldn’t have such terrible taste.”
You were taken aback. You were used to the interruptions, the eye rolling, even being completely ignored. But now, he was just being plain rude.
“What? I said I’m sorry.. What’s your problem?”
You were almost about to snap at him. It took all of your power to not rip into him, calling him every name you could think of.
“My problem? My problem is that ever since you moved here, I can’t get even a moment of peace. Some people have jobs and commitments.”
What the actual fuck?
“Holy shit, Spencer. I’ve done nothing to you, but all you’ve done is be an asshole to me!”
Your anger and frustration seemed to boil over in that exact moment, not caring if you hurt his feelings anymore.
“Actu-”
“No, let me talk for once. I don’t know where you work or what you do to make you think you are so morally superior to me, but fuck. You are so fucking mean.“
He seemed shocked at the sudden outburst, as you only ever showed him your bright and bubbly side. His eyes widened slightly, not expecting the blow-up.
“You don’t get to talk down to me because you’re in a pissy mood. So leave me the fuck alone.”
With that, you slam your door in his face and quickly turn around. Your fists clench as you storm to your room and flop onto your bed, letting out a groan of frustration.
God, he was a nightmare.
-‘๑’-
PT 2
a.n : sorry if this sucks or is boring! i’ve never wrote a story like this before but i hope it’s okay!
#spencer reid#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x you#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid imagine#criminal minds#criminal minds fanfiction#criminal minds imagine#spencer reid x y/n#spencer reid x fem!reader#juqtier writes… 🐈#cm imagine#spencer reid fluff#spencer reid angst
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