#I like big books and I cannot lie

[truthfultales]

Professor Gale Dekarios is seen walking the stairs to his classroom at the Blackstaff Academy.

His students want to greet him, but notice he is singing and humming to himself.

"I like big books and I cannot lie You other brothers can't deny That when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist And a round thing in your face

You get sprung Wanna pull up tough 'Cause you notice that book was stuffed *hums* I'm hooked and I can't stop staring

Oh, baby I wanna get with ya And take your picture My homeboys tried to warn me But that book you got Makes (me so horny)"

Some students chuckle, others stare at him mouth agape, but as soon as Professor Dekarios witnesses them, he raises his hand, graces them with a boyish smile and lets them know he is looking forward to the upcoming class.

I bet Gale would be irritated by the original but it would stick, so he´d end up humming and singing it - sometimes without noticing. Dorky Professor Dekarios has my heart.

[belzebubsofficial]

The date continues...

[kaywrites23]

I think I am kinda in the middle. Some stories benefit from romance and others just don’t need it to enhance the plot.

How about you, what do you think?

[manoomagoo]

Mi hanno chiesto dei consigli di lettura per Natale: siccome non c'erano indicazioni, ho deciso per:

La saga che mi ha fatto innamorare della lettura

Un romanzo agrodolce che parla di amore, di viaggi e di dignità

Un libello squisito la cui protagonista è la più iconica delle regine

Un romanzo sull'India e sulle sue donne (che ha anche le ricette dei cibi che mangiano in treno)

IL romanzo dove c'è tutto: amore, disprezzo, vendetta, riscatto, perdono, avventura.

[skitzoprincepnw]

1.22.23

I just started reading Artemis Fowl and I just read the first chapter..

Thanks Amazon Prime

[kaywrites23]

Currently reading Kingdom of Ash and I’m scared

[rbtbc]

My March of the Mammoth book pick.

She thick. 816 pages. Pray my strength in the Lordt!!

[ibeattheinternet]

[notalostcausejustyet]

📖📚📕

The reason I like reading a book in one day is because I love watching people look at the size of the book in pure horror and then back at me like I just became terrifying in their eyes

[sarah-aliterarylife]

5 Doorstop Novels For a Long Weekend

I like big books and I cannot lie! Please excuse the Sir Mixalot reference, but I love a big book.

Here are a few of my favourites :

1. Gone With the Wind by Margaret Mitchell (825 pages) Five weeks. That’s how long it took me to get through Margaret Mitchell’s epic exploration of the American Civil War and life in the Deep South.

Fans of the film should be mindful that the novel is very different to the film version. Scarlet O’Hara is much less of a southern belle in the book – she’s an unapologetic, hardnosed , and at times shockingly unpleasant, woman. She gives birth to 3 children (not one, as depicted in the film), and her first two marriages are not quickly discarded failures – indeed her second marriage to Frank Kennedy lasts for several years and is probably her happiest, if not her most comfortable, relationship.

There is no doubt that Gone With the Wind is a controversial novel. Much of the language and attitudes are of their time and have the power to shock modern readers to their core (myself included). But as an epic tale of war, poverty, love, heartbreak and loss, there is little to beat it.

2. Jonathan Strange and Mr Norrell by Susannah Clarke (865 pages) Sorry JK Rowling – this is the finest novel ever written about wizardry and magic in England. Fantasy books don’t usually do it for me, but Susannah Clarke’s depiction of two wizards in 19th century England was recommended to me by a good friend and family member. It blew my mind! It was so good that I read it again a few years later, just in time for the BBC adaptation.

Jonathan Strange and Mr Norrell has been described as Tolkein meets Jane Austen, but I don’t think that quite does it justice. It has stormy nights, spells, haunted ballrooms, bells that ring in the night, and sinister gentlemen with thistledown hair. It also has a terrifying scene at York Minister involving talking statues. (I’ve still never visited York Minster - you’ll understand why if you’ve ever read the book)

It is a novel that enthrals and scares the reader in equal measure!

3. The Goldfinch by Donna Tartt (771 pages) I wasn’t expecting to enjoy The Goldfinch as much as I did. At first, I couldn’t quite wrap my head around how the tale of little boy who steals a priceless painting could be strung out over 771 pages. That shows how much I know. I couldn’t put it down! What unfolds is an unforgettable story of childhood trauma, addiction, the value of authenticity, despair and ultimately, hope. I loved it and can’t recommend it highly enough.

4. Demon Copperhead by Barbara Kingsolver (633 pages) This is a great choice for readers who are interested in Charles Dickens but intimidated by the complexity of his novels. I read this book during Christmas 2022 – it took me a big two weeks to finish, but every word was worth it. It’s a riveting read.

The novel transports Dicken’s David Copperfield to the Appalachian Mountains in Virginia, one of the poorest areas of the USA. Dickens’ themes of poverty and survival are translated effortlessly to the US foster care system. In this world, family may be the one we are born with, or the one given to us via social care. Addiction is everywhere and poverty is “as natural as the grass grows”.

I won’t spoil much more of this wonderful book as I will discuss it in greater detail in a future instalment, but suffice to say you will not regret making the acquaintance of Demon Copperhead and his friends.

5. The Luminaries by Eleanor Catton (853 pages) “Like a circle in a circle, like a wheel within a wheel” I found this quote from the song The Windmills of Your Mind on the Amazon listing for The Luminaries, and it sums up this twisty, spiralling novel very well. Don’t bother with the BBC’s pedestrian adaptation – your time is far better spent on delving into the novel instead.

The Luminaries demands of the reader an investment both of time and focus. Set in the New Zealand goldfields in 1866, it is a story that quite literally takes place at the end of the world.

We begin with a tense gathering of twelve men, who meet in secret to discuss a series of unsolved crimes. From there unfolds a story about boom and bust, shipping, banking, murders and ghosts. Don’t try and read it on your daily commute (like I did). Settle in next to a roaring fire, grab a blanket and a hot drink, and just go with it. Let the twisting, slippery narrative and the darkness wash over you. You won’t regret it. What’s your favourite doorstop novel?

[bestbookfriends]

The fact that Xaden is drawn as much (or perhaps more) to Violet's intelligence as he is to her physique is refreshing. So often an MMC comments on the FMC's looks or emotive qualities, sometimes even their physical strength / prowess. Rarely is the comment made about the FMC's intelligence. I'm here for it.

[ladyinthebluebox]

every now and again i realise i might have a bit of a problem 🫣🤡 then i order another art book xdd

[printcharms]

[virmillion]

local idiot reads book titled 'icarus,' is shocked when it contains references to falling and the sun, more at eleven

[astronicht]

Okay I'm almost done with Fellowship, here's an incomplete list of shit I noticed and thought was buck fucking wild on my first ever read-thru: medieval edition.

In literally the second line of the book, Tolkien implies that Bilbo Baggins wrote a story which was preserved alongside the in-universe version of the Mabinogion (aka the best-known collection of Welsh myths; I promise this is batshit). This is because The Hobbit has been preserved, in Tolkien's AU version of our world, in a "selection of the Red Book of Westmarch" (Prologue, Concerning Hobbits). If you're a medievalist and you see something called "The Red Book of" or "The Black Book of" etc it's a Thing. In this case, a cheeky reference to the Red Book of Hergest (Llyfr Coch Hergest). There are a few Red Books, but only Hergest has stories).

not a medieval thing but i did not expect one common theory among hobbits for the death of Frodo's parents to be A RUMORED MURDER-SUICIDE.

At the beginning of the book a few hobbits report seeing a moving elm tree up on the moors, heading west (thru or past the Shire). I mentioned this in another post, but another rule: if you see an elm tree, that's a Girl Tree. In Norse creation myth, the first people were carved from driftwood by the gods. Their names were Askr (Ash, as in the tree), the first man, and Embla (debated, but likely elm tree), the first woman. A lot of ppl have I think guessed that that was an ent-wife, but like. Literally that was a GIRL. TREE.

Medieval thing: I used to read the runes on the covers of The Hobbit and LOTR for fun when I worked in a bookshop. There's a mix of Old Norse (viking) and Old English runes in use, but all the ones I've noticed so far are real and readable if you know runes.

Tom Bombadil makes perfect sense if you once spent months of your life researching the early medieval art of galdor, which was the use of poems or songs to do a form of word-magic, often incorporating gibberish. If you think maybe Tolkien did not base the entirety of Fellowship so far around learning and using galdor and thus the power of words and stories, that is fine I cannot force you. He did personally translate "galdor" in Beowulf as "spell" (spell, amusingly, used to mean "story"). And also he named an elf Galdor. Like he very much did name an elf Galdor.

Tom Bombadil in fact does galdor from the moment we meet him. He arrives and fights the evil galdor (song) of the willow tree ("old gray willow-man, he's a mighty singer"), which is singing the hobbits to sleep and possibly eating them, with a galdor (song) of his own. Then he wanders off still singing, incorporating gibberish. I think it was at this point that I started clawing my face.

THEN Tom Bombadil makes perfect sense if you've read the description of the scop's songs in Beowulf (Beowulf again, but hey, Tolkien did famously a. translate it b. write a fanfiction about it called Sellic Spell where he gave Beowulf an arguably homoerotic Best Friend). The scop (pronounched shop) is a poet who sings about deeds on earth, but also by profession must know how to sing the song or tell the story of how the cosmos itself came to be. The wise-singer who knows the deep lore of the early universe is a standard trope in Old English literature, not just Beowulf! Anyway Tom Bombadil takes everyone home and tells them THE ENTIRE STORY OF ALL THE AGES OF THE EARTH BACKWARDS UNTIL JUST BEFORE THE MOMENT OF CREATION, THE BIG BANG ITSELF and then Frodo Baggins falls asleep.

Tom Bombadil knows about plate tectonics

This is sort of a lie, Tom Bombadil describes the oceans of old being in a different place, which works as a standard visual of Old English creation, which being Christian followed vaguely Genesis lines, and vaguely Christian Genesis involves a lot of water. TOLKIEN knew about plate tectonics though.

Actually I just checked whether Tolkien knew about plate tectonics because I know the advent of plate tectonics theory took forever bc people HATED it and Alfred Wegener suffered for like 50 years. So! actually while Tolkien was writing LOTR, the scientific community was literally still not sure plate tectonics existed. Tom Bombadil knew tho.

Remember that next time you (a geologist) are forced to look at the Middle Earth map.

I'm not even done with Tom Bombadil but I'm stopping here tonight. Plate tectonics got me. There's a great early (but almost high!) medieval treatise on cosmology and also volcanoes and i wonder if tolkien read it. oh my god. i'm going to bed.

edit: part II