#I know some folks feel more comfortable chatting on there then here

[candyheartedchy]

Any mutuals who have discord and wants to be friends on there, feel free to dm me for mine!

[court-jobi]

Alexa, Play...

((banner by me! I don't own Horikoshi's work OR the mindblowing art of @gsony24~used w permission))

Pairing: Midoriya x reader

Words: 1.6k

Rating: G~

Warnings: Southern US!GNreader, comfort fic, tooth-rotting fluff here y'all, established relationship, language barrier, dancing-in-the-kitchen level self-insert

Summary:

Izuku comes home to spot your grocery list on the fridge written out in your native language- something he sees just as rarely as hearing you speak it. Just when he thinks he couldn't possibly find you more adorable, you strike a match and chuck it into his heart with a touch as simple as a peck on his cheek, a laugh thrown his way... or -like now- when you chat over the phone in an accent he never gets to hear. He wants to hear more so badly, and asks for it so sweetly.

A/N: a short n'sweet one today, folks, bc I was missing writing for this sweet green bean. I have yet to see MHA: You're Next, but have no one to see it with ughhhhh so off to writing fanfic to soothe the pain~

For my My Hero Academia Masterlist, check it out here!

Read on Ao3

You're on the phone with your mom when Izuku finds your sticky note for shopping on the fridge. His mindful shut of the door was appreciated by your mouthed apology, but let him know that he'd best occupy himself solo for a bit while you catch up. The time difference between your home country and here leaves your windows to chat limited, so he’s happy when your schedules align like this. 

If you'll be on a while longer, he thinks he can take a quick drive and pick up these few things for you. Inspired by the idea, he plucks the list out from the magnet’s hold.

You've got nice handwriting, a blend between printed letters and a tilted, cursive script. Personality shines especially near the end of a word, when you're rushing to move onto the next thought. 

Painter’s tape

bananas

white vinegar (stupid drain line)

It's so simple, but when it's written in your native language by default, it feels like a secret to be reading even something so simple as a list like this– scribbled out in the way as it appears in your head.

For most formal paperwork, your kana characters are decently executed, though it's always going to be harder when you grew up speaking Japanese rather than filling out lines and lines of bellwork in the kanji style. This isn't to say you've not been trying:

Over the course of your courtship, you've bonded with young Eri as an extension of Izuku's life and have inherited some of her early learning textbooks. You happened on them by accident, when you were helping her paint her room a few months ago. It sounded elementary when you expressed the interest to read and write Japanese better, and the sweet girl was so enthusiastic to help! 

She lent you her books, but of course you weren't becoming an expert overnight. However slow you’d pace yourself, Izuku was plenty proud of you for making the effort. He'd allow you as much grace as he could spare– especially since your notes were still so cute to find here and there~

Across the room, pacing along every other tile on the floor like stepping stones, you look up catching Izuku staring. You’ve been deep in conversation for only about an hour, but give him a wrench of your nose in jest, and begin wrapping up the call explaining that he’s home and you’d like to greet him properly. 

Izuku calls out a quick 'hi’ and ‘bye' to your mom when he motions to go on speaker; you're not one to refuse him, as he well knows. 

You seem pleased on more than one front when he asks to talk to your family, so he continues to do it. For one, you’re touched by how spirited he is to even want to interact with your mother, and his dropping of formalities and reverting to English to speak to her means a lot to you. Neither point is lost on sweet Izuku, based on how your smile brightens when he jogs over to you to be more in speaking range. 

When you hang up, you're quick to pop up and kiss him as a welcome home. Izuku hangs onto you a little longer than usual, thumb rubbing into your cheek as he savors you several times in quick succession. 

Just when he thinks he couldn't possibly find you more adorable, you strike a match and chuck it into his heart with a touch as simple as a peck on his cheek or a laugh thrown his way. 

“‘Zuku, what's that look for, babe?” 

In your sentimental bliss, you're still surprised to get such adoring treatment from him almost a year into a relationship. 

“Nothing,” Izuku chimes back, “I just forget that you're this American sometimes~”

“Whaddya mean, ‘you forget’?!” the concept sounds hilarious to you. 

“I do!” Izuku offers to take your phone to plug it in nearby, “I have to remind myself that Japanese isn't your first language, until I see you on FaceTime with your mom. Out of nowhere, I'll just hear you sound so different, like: ‘byyyye~ talk to y'all later’!”

You snort at his attempt at a southern accent– stiff and stuck on the wrong vowels. Clearly this succeeds in amusing you, because you hop up and down on the balls of your feet like you've discovered a new game:

“Oh my God, ‘Texas Smash Deku’ is the stuff of my fantasies!– oo!! say, ‘I’d like a honey butter chicken biscuit’~”

“WHAT?? N-no!!”

“What YES!! Please??”

Both doubled over in laughter, you're entertained over his thorough embarrassment, but you're both smitten and carefree: holding onto each other despite nearly buckling at the knees.

Izuku tries his best to catch his breathe first, determined to explain himself,

“I can't do it right! It's like- you say things- I don't know how to describe it! It's not just the flat, movie star accent.. It's–"

“What, a-- ‘drawl’? ‘Twang’?”

Izuku snaps at the realization.

“Yes!! That!! The country kind, like that chef you watch!”

You've rolled your eyes, stepping out of his kind hold in favor of checking out what takeout he brought home. 

“-Hey, no, come back!”

“‘Makin’ fun'ah my accent, I outta smack you’.”

You're far from really mad as you tote around the kitchen getting silverware and soy sauce, but Izuku follows you around like a shadow regardless. Eyes full of that puppy love, he does try to block you in from the pantry closet,

“I’m sorry, honey~”

“No you're not.” --but you're grinning out of forgiveness anyway.

Izuku sneaks a hold on you, reeling you in. It’s cozy in your shared kitchen, alight with just the right amount of overhead lighting and enough space for you two to stand and share tasks.

“I do like hearing you talk like that,” he shares contentedly, “It’s nice to listen to that side of you, especially when you have a lot to say.”

“Yeah well,” you turn into his arms, rather than away, “I'm sure you've noticed already, it comes from her side of the family. Guess I can't really ditch the accent whenever I switch back. The more I think about it… I'm gonna be happy if I can keep sounding like her as I get older. Lets me keep something of hers- even if my ‘dashing hero’ of a man over here thinks I'm being cheeky."

“No, I'm not teasing now! I mean it,” Izuku presses into you, “I only meant, you don't hold back or anything when you're chatty with her.”

He wonders if it stems from shyness, your avoidance of using too much English here at home. If you’re jamming out while doing chores -presuming you’re alone- you’ll switch the station once you know you have an audience.

“Not trying to hide it with you! I'm just out of practice here. No one else in our circle really uses English, so it doesn't come up, I guess.”

You make the point with a wistful aire. Occasionally you'll sub English classes as a favor to Izuku’s effervescent coworker at UA, but not often enough to get too much exposure. He's always been impressed with your Japanese diction, and thinks you could very well go into teaching if you ever wanted a career change.

Still, whether its for work or play, it’s a sound that’s intrinsically you, and there’s a magic to it that Izuku finds himself chasing. A secret power of yours, if he could only unlock it.

“--Plus, I don't think a lot of the slang translates over?” you get comfortable in his arms, locking your fingers behind his neck with no intention of leaving as you muse, “You guys have your own here, and that’s hard to figure out anyway.”

“I suppose you’re right.” 

Tenderly, you run your nails through his hair, a thoughtful look up to him, 

“Do you want me to use it more at home? Lay on the sugar for ya?”

A chance to hear you at your core? Watch your handwritten notes come alive?

“If you want-” Izuku softens, “-if you’re comfortable.”

“Can you understand me though?”

“I can hear you. It only gets hard when you get excited, ‘cuz you talk fast.”

You fuss back at him, “Oh, as if you don't.”

Caught under your hypocritical eye, he can only offer an honest chuckle back, “Fair~”

But for all of your feeling put on the spotlight, you seem to hold a soft spot for the way Izuku makes his requests:

“ ‘I guess I can indulge ya, since you asked so nicely.’ ”

–and it’s enough for him to try his hand to give you a linguistic sparring partner right back:

“ ‘Say something else.’ ”

All English flies out the window when he's looking at you like this, as you fall under a fit of nervous laughter, “What am I supposed to say?!” 

“ ‘Sing me a song, my love. Something 'twangy'.”

You giggled, "'Twangy', good Lord…” 

Izuku could write novels on everything from your finest features to even your most pensive insecurities, romanticizing each of them into a beautifully imperfect anthology. He does so in his mind, at least, when you’re barely lucid on the edge of sleep but still trying to engage him in meaningful conversation. He’ll do so in the notes on his phone, when he learns of yet another favorite token of yours, and wants to add it to the list of comfort measures he can refer to when you need it most.

And when you prompt Alexa to play your newly revealed ‘Karaoke hours that will never see the light of day’ playlist -the one that’s chock-full of female power ballads which you begin to sing your own rendition to-  Izuku is certain his mind nor fingers nor heart can catalog how much more he can possibly love you… though he’ll dance in place with you as he listens and soaks it all in.

[kanmom51]

PJM2 is coming

MUSE

I literally cannot contain my excitiement.

Sitting her, at work may I say, putting these words on paper, so to speak, because f***ing hell, wtf JM?

Where to start?

The colour concepts? The choice of name? Choice of font (That JM popping to eye)? The flower? The links to TTU (notes sheet and flower)? The whole play with Closer than this? The dropped lyrics?

This man is a friggin genius (not that we didn't know this already)...

There is so much to talk about, and he hasn't even started with the promotions, and we haven't even seen the concept photos or the album and the songs. Name, colours, 2 lines of lyrics and we have our hands full already. They certainly know what they are doing.

Before I jump in, I want to, once again, state very loudly and clearly that everything written here are my opinions, which are based on what we've been handed so far, and could change the more we are shown.

So, let's get it...

JM fetching this from the purple locker (which we don't see are purple off the bat and only when the lights turn on). Notes for The Truth Untold.

His wittle thumb with his crescent moon.

The notes title : La lettra - The letter. Hmm... interesting.

And then this:

We have the flower:

and this that makes me believe that yes indeed, it is the silhouette of a Smeralso.

Some of this I am yet to see where is going. like the referencing of "the letter", The truth untold, the flower... (she says, all while thinking of the choice this Festa to stream LY Seoul final with said song and the changes that JM and JK chose to make to it)...

All that and more in one little short clip.

And then we have that little 'chat' opened up by BH, and those lyrics. Oh, those lyrics.

All references that indeed can be connected with army. I mean, that's what JM is king of.

All also a clear reference to a one Jeon Jungkook, if you are only willing to look and see.

Rain

Snow

Crying

We have this:

Which they have BOTH chose to bring up once again in 2023, JK happening to do so during JM's Face promos, not to mention the rain reference in SNTY (and of course, goes without saying Still with you, but that's back in 2020, while they have both managed to bring it up and reference it once again in 2023).

Remember this?

Oh, and what about this?

And then we have these:

Remember JM tearing up after winning MMA for BS&T ?

JM getting emotional and crying only followed by JK tearing up.

*If you haven't seen this one yet, go watch the full live.

And who can forget JK during MOTS ONE as well, seeing JM crying, distress clearly showing on his face, just waiting for the moment he can go and comfort JM.

If these are actual lyrics for a song to come or lyrics that were dropped, one thing we know, and that these words, these lines, they were written by JM, and he made a clear choice to share them with us.

And in doing so, sorry, I'm still not believing this all while sitting here gushing and knowing this was coming (no, I didn't know this specifically was coming, but the feeling that they were going big or going home, that I've had ever since July 2023... took some time and many tribulations, but we are getting there folks). Sidetracked as I always am, lol.

Back on track.... in doing so, JM is basically standing on a rooftop screaming at the top of his lungs:

Not 1, not 2, but 3 JK references in that little shared piece of lyrics clearly written by JM, for an album we are yet to see and hear.

Anyone, and I mean anyone that is a BTS army, that has seen original content, that has followed their Twitter account or seen older tweets, that are open and willing to see it, will KNOW that these lyrics are JAYKAY!!!!!

And let me backtrack a second here...

Cause I did mention that these references could be understood as if they are made for army, right?

So yeah. Army references or JK references? I am going to say both, leaning very much to the JK side of it. Cause that's how they do it. Time after time after time.

Let's mention the colour choices as well.

We have the background colours.

We have the yellow.

And then we have the album concepts.

2 concepts.

Blooming

and Serenade.

Which happens to be Yellow, same colour threaded through Serendipity.

And we even have purple thrown in there too.

Notice how all the lockers are painted purple. The colour of army you may say, but also JK's colour (so again, army and JK?).

And he's pulling out the music sheet from this purple locker.

Those lockers representing his inspiration for his music perhaps?

Giving us these lyrics, then telling us the album is called Muse (or telling us the name of the album and it's meaning and then dropping those lyrics, take your pick regarding the timing, cause basically, same same), showing us the music being extracted from those purple lockers... ya think his muse is that entity he's talking about in those lyrics perhaps (even more so if we see the references as both for army and JK)?

Rhetorical question, btw.

And then we have the mint green.

Perhaps this is what JM was talking about when he told us in his birthday live, if memory serves me right, about going to the starting point, or more so starting from the beginning trying to figure out himself as an artist?

Also, cannot help but think of this image here:

I cannot wait to see his concept photos, and where this is all going.

We talked about JK being so loud during 2023 (well, he's had his super loud moments before that, but 2023 and his lives were smoking). And JM, well it felt (and I say felt, cause it's not really true, and I'll explain why) was quieter, more subdued, especially during JK's Golden promotions.

But here's the thing.

JM and JK have their own special oh so different ways of being loud and showing us themselves (and it shows even more so seeing that JK, for whatever reasons he had for it, did not write his songs for Golden - not saying he did not have influence on the lyrics or choice of songs with lyrics he wanted). JK did it through his choices in his photo shoots and styling for his songs and album. He did it with his lives and his total fanboying over JM. And JM, he does it through his art, which includes also but not only his lyrics.

Those two are both loud as fuck. And JM, well if these sneak lyrics are a promo of more to come (which, they probably are seeing that we have Face to fall back on as an example), then he's as loud as a frigging foghorn.

And last but not least, before I go:

Lookie here...

D-31

[fan-fantasies]

Jealousy and Dreams (part two)

A/N: thank you so much for the fantastic response to the first part! The ending on this one sucks but I hope you enjoy nonetheless!

Pairing: Rhea Ripley x Reader

Warnings: jealousy, oral (f receiving obvi), fingering, swearing probably

Part one

Rhea was sleeping peacefully when she felt you moving against her. You pressed your ass further into her hips as you squirmed.

“Mm-more,” you mumbled.

Rhea’s eyes shot open.

She looked at you sleeping next to her, a small sheen of sweat covering you.

“Please,” you whimpered. She looked over to Damian in a panic, not wanting him to hear you. But he was a heavy sleeper and didn’t even stir.

Rhea wasn’t sure if she should wake you or just let you…finish. She placed a hand on your shoulder with every intention of giving you a gentle shake.

“Oh Rhea,” you sighed.

She froze.

She definitely couldn’t wake you now; that would be too awkward. Or would it? You wanted her to some extent and she wanted you so maybe it would work in her favor.

Before she could think on it further, Damian let out a loud snore that seemed to scare you out of your dream and back into a deep sleep.

Rhea just laid there, staring at the ceiling with a smile on her face.

Morning came much to soon and you woke up feeling hot, thanks to the Australian beekcake that was pressed up against you, holding you tightly against her.

You were sure your heart pounding in your chest would wake her.

You stirred a little trying to get more comfortable, but Damian was already awake and once he saw you were too, he clapped his hands together loudly.

“Finally!” He yelled.

“Why are you still here?” Rhea groaned, rubbing her eyes. She was hoping for some privacy this morning.

“Because we’re getting breakfast before the flight. Let’s go, ya lazy bums,” he chuckled. Why did he have to be such a morning person?

“Good morning,” Rhea said to you, shooting you a smile.

“Morning; how’d you sleep?” You asked, sliding from the bed to get ready for the day.

“Ya know, I actually had the craziest dream with you in it,” Rhea told you, waiting for your reaction. You paused, waiting for her to continue.

“What was it about?” You asked hesitantly, your own dream flashing back into your mind. She got out of bed and stood behind you.

“Wouldn’t you like to know,” she whispered in your ear before laughing. She sauntered into the bathroom, leaving you flustered. What has gotten into that woman?

You met up with some other folks to grab breakfast before a quick flight. They could all tell you were on edge about something and Rhea made sure to stick to you like glue which definitely wasn’t helping the situation. You felt like you were going to explode.

“You okay, gorgeous?” Rhea asked, plopping down into the seat next to you on the flight.

“I thought Finn was sitting with me this time?”

“He asked to switch, is that okay?”

“Oh yeah, of course! Why wouldn’t it be?” You laughed nervously.

“Just wanted to make sure,” she said, giving your thigh a squeeze. You thought she’d remove it once she was done, but she left it there which had your heart racing.

Thankfully the flight was a short one and the drive to the venue for the live show was even quicker.

For live shows, you got to do your own hair and makeup so you did something simple You liked the live shows; there was less pressure and there could be more fan interaction. You’d usually chat with the fans sitting behind your chair and tonight’s crowd was particularly chatty.

You could tell the young man behind you was attempting to flirt with you. You did your best to remain friendly and professional. He wasn’t bad looking and was actually quite funny, but there was only one person on your mind.

And that person also noticed that your new friend was flirting with you. She had her own match against Natalya and she couldn’t keep her eyes off of you. Every time she saw the man lean over and say something to you, making you smile, she’d slam Nattie a little harder.

The assault was short, Rhea pinning her in her favorite style all while maintaining eye contact with you. Heat rushed to your face as you announced her as the winner. She blew you a kiss which you pretended to catch.

Rhea remained ringside for the next match which was Dom versus Ali. She did her best to focus on the match but she couldn’t help but watch as the man behind you wouldn’t leave you alone. Finally, having enough, she stomped over and grabbed your chair.

“Back off, she’s Mami’s girl,” she snapped, lifting you and your chair and moving you away from him.

“Rhea,” you shrieked as she finally set you down.

“Stay put, sweetheart,” she whispered, leaning down and pressed a kiss to your cheek. The crowd was whooping and hollering at her display. You certainly didn’t mind, you just couldn’t tell if it was all for show or not.

Dom ended up winning his match and thankfully it was the final one. You had a lot of feelings to sort through and you didn’t feel like doing it in front of thousands of people.

You went backstage to grab your stuff but ran into Damian before you could reach it.

“Hey! Great job tonight,” he complimented.

“Thank you! I’m exhausted though so I’m gonna go grab my stuff and find a ride to the hotel.”

He turned around and grabbed something from behind him. He turned back around, already holding your stuff.

“I saw it sitting there and figured I’d bring it to you,” he said.

“Oh my god, thank you! You’re a life saver,” you sighed happily, grabbing his hand and giving it a squeeze.

“Do you wanna share a ride back to the hotel? I have one on the way,” he offered.

Before you could answer, you were being lifted off the ground and hauled away.

“She already has a ride!” Rhea called behind her as she carried you off toward the locker room.

“Rhea! Put me down!”

“No, because the second I do, you’re gonna run off and find someone else to flirt with,” she snapped.

“What are you talking about?” You asked. She finally put you down when you got to the empty locker room, most people already on their way to their hotel.

“Damian, Sonya, that random ass guy in the crowd. I swear, you flirt with everyone but me!” She admitted.

“Do you…want me to flirt with you?”

“I’d just like it if you wouldn’t flirt with everyone else.”

“First off, I don’t even know how to flirt. Second, I haven’t been flirting with anyone! And third, even if I was, what’s it matter to anyone else?” You asked. She took a long step toward you, backing you against the wall.

“It matters because you’re mine,” she growled.

“Says who?” You challenged. She thought for a moment before smirking.

“Says you, in your sleep actually. Moaning my name like the desperate little thing you are,” she chuckled. She ran a finger down your cheek and down your neck, making you shiver.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Really? So you’re telling me you haven’t been dreaming about me the last few nights? Tell me, what was I doing to you in those dreams?” She said, leaning in closer.

“Time to go, ladies! Cars are here!” Someone yelled into the locker room. Rhea’s intense stare never left you as she backed away.

“Ride’s here,” she smirked.

Rhea insisted on sitting next to you and it made you feel like your skin was on fire. She knew about the dreams and she was toying with you, you just didn’t know how far she was planning on going with it.

You couldn’t possibly tell her your fantasies. But what if she could make them come true?

“You look like you’re gonna think yourself into a spiral. Calm down, gorgeous,” she said, grabbing your hands that were fidgeting in your lap. “We’re almost there.”

“Yeah that’s the problem,” you mumbled.

“What was that?” She asked.

“Nothing.”

“No speak up. Do I make you nervous?” She asked, leaning in closer.

“No.” You refused to make eye contact with her so she lifted your chin.

“Don’t lie to me. Do. I. Make. You. Nervous?”

“Yes.”

“Do I make your heart race?” She placed a soft kiss on your cheek, quickly pressing another one just below your ear.

“Y-yes.”

“Good, now you know how you make me feel,” she said, pulling away, but still holding your hand.

The driver parked in front of the hotel and you quickly got out, pulling your things from the trunk. Rhea grabbed your bag and carried it with her own which you were grateful for and it was a momentary break from all that had been happening. This was still your sweet Rhea who you cared for, she was just a bit more intimidating now.

She grabbed the key from front desk and led you to the elevator. The tension could be cut with a spoon. Neither of you said anything; you didn’t even know what to say if you wanted to.

You knew what you wanted to say. You wanted to tell her to ravage you and make all of your dreams come true. You couldn’t ignore the aching between your legs any longer. You needed relief and you hoped Rhea wasn’t just teasing and would actually deliver.

Once in your room, you placed your things down and paused for a moment, just to take a deep breath. When you turned around, you jumped slightly, not expecting Rhea to be right behind you.

Before you could say anything, she pulled you closer and pressed her lips to yours. Her tongue swiped your bottom lip before you granted her access to your mouth.

“It drives me insane when I have to watch everyone flirt with you,” she said, easily lifting you up and carrying you to the bed. “Everyone needs to know you’re mine.”

“I’m yours, I swear,” you moaned as Rhea left love bites across your neck. The makeup department was going to hate you after this.

“Tell me about your dreams,” she said, her hands roaming every inch of your body.

“Fuck, it was kinda like this, except with less clothes.”

“I can fix that,” she smirked. She grabbed your top and lifted it over your head. Hers was next to follow as you shimmied out of your pants. “Then what?”

“You went down on me and after you made me cum, you rode my face,” you admitted, too much in the moment to care.

“Is that so? You want me to sit on that pretty face?”

“Please,” you whimpered.

“All in due time,” she chuckled.

She slid your panties down your legs, leaving you bare in front of her. She kissed her way down your body, licking and biting every inch that she could.

She bit particularly hard on your thigh, making you yelp. She just chuckled as she looked up at you through her lashes.

“I hope you’re ready, baby.”

Her head dove straight down to where you had been craving her the most. Her tongue ring nudged your clit just right, making you jump with pleasure. She teased your entrance before dipping her tongue in, fucking you quickly with it.

She picked up speed as she circled your clit, making you throw your head back against the pillows. She stopped her motions causing you to whine.

“Look at me, baby. I wanna see you come undone,” she demanded.

You did your best to look at her, focusing on the pleasure she was giving you. She slid a finger through your folds before plunging into you. She quickly added a second one, thrusting them into you and hitting your spot just right. Her tongue resumed its assault on your clit and it all became too much.

You reached out and grabbed a hold of her hair, holding her in place while you moved your hips to meet the movements of her fingers. You quickly reached your peak, riding your orgasm out against her tongue. She couldn’t help but moan at the taste of you cumming.

“Mami’s turn,” she said, looking at you with a dangerous glint in her eyes.

She removed her pants and underwear quickly before climbing on top of you. You made yourself comfortable as she lowered herself onto your face. She held the headboard to steady herself and began to rock herself back and forth, your tongue happily lapping at her pussy.

The noises falling from her lips were sinful; you could listen to them forever. You did your best to keep your tongue steady against her clit as she fucked your face.

She tasted divine and you knew you could never go back to being just friends after this. You were going to crave her day and night, as if you hadn’t before.

“Fuck, just like that baby. Gonna make Mami cum,” she sighed happily. Her movements sped up until she was using you for her pleasure and you loved every minute of it. Her grip on the headboard tightened before she was cumming on your face. Your name was said like a prayer as she finally came down from her high.

She removed herself from above you and quickly pulled you in for a kiss full of tongue and teeth. She finally slowed down a bit so the two of you could catch your breath.

“Just in case it wasn’t clear, you’re mine now,” she growled, giving you one more slow kiss.

“I promise I’m all yours.”

“So did I make your dreams come true?” She chuckled.

“I think the real thing was even better,” you laughed.

“Just think? Hm, sounds like I didn’t do a good enough job,” she said, making her way down your body once more.

“Rhea, what-“ you were cut off by your own moan as she pushed your legs apart and began eating you out like a starved man once more.

“Just lay back and enjoy, baby. This whole hotel is gonna know who you belong to by the time I’m done with you.”

[roabythecow]

HEY BITCHES, BROS, AND NONBINARY HOES ‼️

ARE YOU A 15 TO 28 AGED WRITER? ARE YOU LOOKING FOR A COMMUNITY OF FELLOW POETS AND WHATNOT LIKE YOURSELF? DO YOU HAVE PETRIFYING LONELINESS? ARE YOU STRUGGLING TO PAY THE BILLS WITH YOUR 9$ AN HOUR?

WELL I CAN SOLVE NOT ONE, NOT THREE, BUT POTENTIALLY TWO OF THOSE PROBLEMS!

Now I know what you're thinking...

I AGREE! 😃 But I assure you, this server is full of pretty chill people, and your typical discord drama is at the bare minimum.

We also prioritize keeping the server small—90 members is our limit—so as not to be overwhelming. We're currently at 45 members (but surprisingly active 🤯), because we took a sit back from advertising since we were comfortable with the size and vibe of our server overall, but we're back at it, and guess what! Since we have a member limit, this is your

"But OP!!! I want to know MORE about this server before joining!! 🥺" You may or may not be saying because you're just so damn impatient and want the link immediately 🙄 /silly

Well, my dear dear Tumblr user, our writing community is diverse, from poets to original authors to fanfiction writers of all genres! And our range of skill levels is just as wide. We have people just stepping foot into the writing scene to folks who've been stuck in the paragraphs for centuries. We chat about our stories, share our work, brainstorm, proofread, and do prompts and sprints. However, I would like to make it clear that our server is more of a writing community, so it isn't as writing-focused as other writing servers out there. I'd say it's 60% fun shenanigans and 40% writing-related. Aside from the writing akin, there's plenty of fandom talk, artwork sharing, fun as hell VCs, movie nights, and speechless music bot VCs if you're feeling extra introverted. /pos

We're also very queer and non-neurotypical up in here. It's a safe space for all races, disabilities, genders, sexualities, and identities. If you're not chill with that, you're not welcome here.

Here are some of our reviews! ✨️

(Please zoom in to read.)

Now my precious ADHD Tumblrina, don't you scroll away just yet if the link doesn't work! You see, because we value a safe environment on our server, we shut down this link once we reach our max amount of members! So please, DM me for a link if necessary, and I'll let you in as soon as there's space! I DON'T BITE! What do you take me for, a horse?

😯 Oh, sorry, didn't see you there, our Tumblr famous server residential horse girl @penciled-palominos

What do you take me for, a toy playing kid?

😯 Oh, sorry, didn't see you there, our Tumblr famous server residential LPS enjoyer @lpsotd

Crazy how I just bumped into those famous people on our server... 🫢

We can't wait to meet you!

[fatfuckingcatstuff]

Babe.

Babe i need platonic reader with the mercs

Them reacting/helping reader get out of sh (Ignor if it makes you uncomfortable)

I just need some motivation to stop burning myself

Pick you fav mercs and maybe gn reader so more folks can enjoy

Luv your work btw <3

Of course you can! And I hope your recovery journey goes well! Sorry it this isn't exactly what you had hoped for but either way I hope you enjoy it.

Medic

- Medic is proud of you for seeking help. He noticed the bandages and, with genuine concern, asked if you wanted to talk. He knows how important it is to have someone listen.

- In his office, he listens without judgment as you open up about your struggles. Medic then suggests regular check-ins, encouraging you to reach out whenever you feel overwhelmed. "You are stronger than you realize, mein freund . There are other ways to cope like harming someone else other than yourself! Remember, my door is always open."

"Oh okay wow thanks medic."

"no worries mein freund :)"

- He offers resources like books on mental health and teaches you stress relief techniques. Medic even shares some basic medical knowledge, so you can better understand your body and how to care for it. He’s always there for you, providing unwavering support.

"Would you like me to help remove those thoughts of yours?"

"you are not going anywhere near my brain."

Spy

- Spy, ever observant, sees the subtle signs of your struggle. He'd brush it off aside during the day but find himself wanting a chat with you alone.

- He'd take you to his smoking room using this private moment to discuss serious matters. "Tell me ma fleur. What's on your mind?"

As you pour your heart out of your struggles and how you've been slowly trying to heal he listens with intent.

"Mon ami, we all have our demons. What matters is how we face them. You have the strength to overcome this, and I will be here to help you every step of the way."

- Spy keeps a watchful eye on you from a distance, ensuring you’re never alone in your vulnerable moments. He wants you to know you can always rely on him for support. Hell he'd start getting noticeably closer to you.

Demoman

- Demoman is proud of you for opening up. He brings it up casually, noticing your reluctance to show your arms. With genuine concern, he gently prods and listens.

"Aye I hear ye lassie/laddie"

- He shares his own struggles, making you feel less isolated and more understood. I feel as though he would occasionally offer a bottle or 2 of scrumpy to *help* in which you would always refuse but thank him.

- He regularly checks in on you, using humor and camaraderie to lighten your mood and make sure you’re doing alright.

"Ye know, we all got our battles. But ye don't have to fight 'em alone. Anytime ye feel down, just come find me. We'll have a laugh, aye?"

Pyro

They notice your distress through your body language and offer comfort without words. Pyro sits beside you, offering his toys and gadgets to play around with to distract your mind from the simple idea of harming yourself.

"Mmphhshs mpyymph mpthhh mthjs mppjdhh"

"Thank you pyro"

- They introduce you to creative activities like painting or building crafts, helping you channel your emotions into art. Pyro’s presence becomes a comforting constant.

- Pyro ensures you always have a safe space to retreat to, filled with comforting and familiar items to help ground you during tough times.

Sniper

- Sniper would be a little taken aback I feel. Sure he had noticed your change in behavior but he wasn't really expecting it.

- He invites you to his perch, sharing the tranquility of the outdoors. Sniper opens up about his own ways of dealing with isolation and stress, teaching you about the calming effects of nature. "It's alright, mate. Sometimes, getting out here and away from it all helps clear the mind. Whenever you need to talk or just want some company, you know where to find me."

- He takes you on walks, introducing you to nature therapy. Mundy would provide steady, reliable support, always there for late-night talks and his presence if you ever need him. He wants you to know you have someone who cares.

[whatdaikesneed]

There's a bar near my place that's not a gay bar, but is very queer-friendly, and I spend some time there most days. I get to know the folks who come in and out. And last spring, this girl who I'd been seeing around for a couple years started coming in. She was a junior in college, studying botany, and she'd just turned 21.

The first few times I saw her she was there with her girlfriend, and they were all over each other. I'm like 90% sure I watched the girlfriend finger her to orgasm at the bar on a busy night. But eventually, things cooled down between them, then the girlfriend stopped coming, she started coming in earlier and more often, and she'd get pretty drunk.

We talked a little bit here and there. We knew each other, but I wouldn't call us friends at that point. But one day she came in and I was the only person there. It was mid-afternoon, and I was nursing a beer and getting some work done, and she was sitting at the bar. We started chatting, and I asked about the presumed-ex. She filled with furious energy, and came over to my booth to tell me all about her.

It sounded like the ex was kind of a piece of shit. They're both Black, but my girl is a lot darker, and apparently the light skinned girl said a lot of really colorist shit that was making her feel awful about herself. I'm not gonna pretend to get the nuances of colorism in American Blackness, but it sounded Bad.

We talked for like three hours, and after that whenever I was there and she was in early she'd come and talk to me. We talked about a lot of the stuff she was dealing with, and sometimes she'd just bring her laptop and work next to me. She caught up on a lot of stuff she'd fallen behind on during her shitty relationship while we sat together.

Near the end of the semester, I wasn't planning to go to the bar one Wednesday, and I got a text from her asking if I was gonna be there—she'd just arrived and she had stuff she needed to work on, and said she really needed her co-working buddy. I told her I was working from home that day, but she was welcome to come by. She said yeah, so I gave her my address.

She got there and we worked together on my couch for like an hour, before she said she needed a break and put her laptop down on the coffee table. I put mine down as well, and then she asked if she could give me a hug. I said of course, and she wrapped her arms around me and buried her face in my chest. I realized after a moment she was crying, so I just held her tight and rubbed her back.

Over the course of probably fifteen minutes, that slowly became laying down on the couch together, face to face, cuddling. I was hard, and at some point in that transition she noticed—she had a leg around me, and was pressing her mound into my erection. One of her hands had reached the back of my neck, the other was just barely short of grabbing my ass. My hands were both on her back, but one of them had found bare skin and slid just up under her shirt.

Nothing happened that day, but we coworked at my place almost every day for the next week, and always took long cuddle breaks. We started doing it in my bed. She was dressing, if not provocatively, then much more accessibly. Boundaries fell one by one. She'd start fully grabbing my ass. I slid my hands all the way up her shirt. She started wearing skirts. I put my hands on her legs, and pulled her into my bulge, grabbing her ass. She started grinding on my cock, moaning softly.

After the last day of classes, she came over and asked to cuddle right away, saying she needed to de-stress for finals. I said of course, and we went to the bedroom.

When we got there, she asked if I'd mind if she took some of her clothes off, saying more skin to skin contact would be comforting. I said of course, and asked if she'd like me to, as well.

She's stunning, by the way. Not everyone who I write about on here looks like a fucking model, but this girl is an Archetype of hot. And she was wearing a matching lacy purple bra and panties set that I'd caught glimpses of before, when she was practically undressing at the bar with her ex.

We both got on the bed together in our underwear. At the increased level of exposure, it seemed important to dial back the horniness, and we just held each other for a while. I massaged her shoulders and neck while she just held herself against me, arms and one leg pulling me close. As I moved down, she asked me to take off her bra, to get it out of the way. I unfastened it, and she took it off entirely and put it aside on the bed. Her breasts pressed into my chest, and she nestled her face into my neck as I continued to caress her.

As I massaged her back and sides, I felt her place her lips against my neck, gently, almost as if by accident. When I didn't stop her, it became a kiss. Then she kissed my neck again, and pressed her vulva into my cock, and kissed me again, and again, and she moved up to my jawline, kissing over and over with increasing urgency, grinding against my cock. She covered my face in kisses before finally landing on my lips, and she pushed me onto my back and held me down while she passionately kissed me over and over, quickly escalating to making out.

She took my cock out of my underwear and pulled her panties aside, so she could rub it directly against her vulva, but after a few minutes that proved too unwieldy so she took off her own underwear and then mine, then returned to kissing me and rubbing herself against my cock. She was sliding me into herself just a little bit more every thrust, until before long my cock wasn't coming back out again on each stroke. I put my hands on her hips and slightly adjusted her position, and slid all the way into her. She moaned desperately into my mouth and started fucking me harder.

I felt her cum at least three times—she has very strong muscles down there—and when I tried to warn her that I was going to cum she just laughed hungrily into my mouth and kept going. I came, but she didn't stop fucking me, and it wasn't until I came again—with her, the second time—that my cock needed too much of a break and fell out of her. She kept kissing me and giggling until we fell asleep together.

We spent a lot of time together, and fucked about three times a day, until finals were over and she had to go home for the summer. This semester things have been cooler, we've gone back to co-working at the bar. We've fucked a few times, but she's also getting back into the dating pool.

[codenameredkrystalmatrix]

Made with Love- Miguel O’Hara x FemReader

You could always trust him to bring the perfect close to a day at the café.

"Alright folks, keep it up. I want you all out of my place by 6 o'clock sharp!"

Translation: I know it's been a busy week, so I want you all to get some time off. I'll clean up here.

You smiled, joining in the teasing "Yes, sir, manager, sir!" with your co-workers. Isaac groaned, keeping up his unsmiling exterior.

Tables to wait, orders to write, customers to chat with- why hadn't Amanda made the amaretto yet? Oh, Jayce was here for his pound cake- did they have enough pumpkin for the muffins?

Yep, the post work rush was in full swing.

There was strain in your legs and and a bit of a rasp to your voice, but you wouldn't trade this for the world. Seeing people's faces light up when they tried something new, or close their eyes in contentment when they had their old favourites- this was your little slice (pun absolutely intended) of heaven. Although, there was one more thing that could have made it perf- oh crud!

"I have to do deliveries!"

"Nope! My turn!" Daniel gave you a two-fingered salute before putting on a bike helmet. "Check the roster!"

When you did look, he was right. Huh. You were certain it was yours, but you dismissed it. There was plenty to do inside.

The tide of activity ebbed and flowed as the hours wore on. As always, the hustle and bustle eased as daylight faded. The heat of many bodies crowded in one little café dissipated. Newcomers and regulars alike bid their goodbyes, and you could finally catch your breath.

You'd been sitting in the back kitchen when it happened. Dani called your name in that unmistakable singsong. “Someone’s here for you!”

He came? Your heart soared. It had been a while since Miguel last visited you on work. You could have your little evening ritual together.

You headed into the employee fridge, and picked up your packages, hoping he'd like the treats you'd chosen. As per store policy, employees got some of the goods that hadn't sold immediately to minimize waste. They were all well-kept, so there was no fuss about it. The rest would be donated wherever they could bring smiles.

Speeding into Entering the main dining area again, you saw the tall, mocha-toned man you loved smiling at you. “What brings you here, stranger?”

Reaching out, he slid his hands around your torso, guiding you into his chest for a gentle hug. “I missed you too.”

Hands occupied, you burrowed in with the rest of your body and smiled.

“How's work?”

“Busy. I thought you had all those new contracts to review, Mr. CEO!”

He stepped back slightly, the golden light dancing in his curls and giving a warm tone to those mahogany eyes.

“Sólo quería ver tu bonita cara.”

Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Isaac tap the sign before heading out back. It featured a crossed-out can, then a crossed-out plate of noodles. Customers were told that it was the store policy on fast food. Your dear co-workers who knew the truth, however, snickered.

You huffed, deciding you'd ignore them all.

Once comfortable at a table, you produced your personal favourites, plus his cheesecake bars and mangonada sorbet from the bag. "I had to fight my way through Melinda and Sean for those, so enjoy them!"

"Your trials will be remembered, noble knight." He smirked, tasting the sorbet and giving a satisfied hum. You took a spoon and delved into your own treats, already feeling more relaxed.

The two of you fell into the comfortable rhythm of conversation, jokes, and the occasional silence. Given he worked in a much bigger business, there was always some new project or opera-worthy employee drama to discuss- told in his sarcastic, deadpan style that made you laugh to tears. You'd won the jackpot, my friend.

During a lull, one of Miguel's hands rested on the table as he reclined. An idea came. With a burst of courage and affection, you took his hand with both your own, lifted it to your lips and kissed it gently. You whispered what you wanted to say in Spanish, so he'd truly understand how much you appreciated him.

"Cada vez que se vuelve demasiado pesado, pienso en casa y pienso en ti."

A tiny gasp escaped his plump, parted lips, before his expression melted to fondness. The hand in your grasp moved to cradle your cheek. Leaning over, Miguel left a kiss to the corner of your mouth, then cheek, then trailed butterfly kisses down your neck.

"No sabes lo feliz que me hace, mi tesoro."

Shivers ran down your spine at the feeling of his lips. You'd reached up to pull him closer, but a tiny voice in your head reminded you of the sign.

You sighed, trying to think past the lightheadedness he always caused. “My…erm...boss doesn’t want us to…”

Miguel laughed, pulling back and looking at you one more time. “Let’s go home, then.”

Nodding enthusiastically, you went to get the rest of your belongings. The roster lay on its usual shelf, and you signed your name before leaving...wait. For all the other weeks, today really was supposed to be the day you you did deliveries. That sneaking Isaac had reassigned you so you could see Miguel more often. You shook your head, both amused and grateful.

As you headed out together, Miguel smiled to himself. One day, he’d tell you each secret and regret that weighed on him. He trusted you. But for now, he’d enjoy these happy days.

Translations:

“Sólo quería ver tu bonita cara.” : I just wanted to see your pretty face.

"Cada vez que se vuelve demasiado pesado, pienso en casa y pienso en ti." : Every time it becomes too much to bear, I think of home and I think of you.

"No sabes lo feliz que me hace, mi tesoro." : You don't know how happy that makes me, my treasure.

(Please accept my humble offering to the community. *runs back into the forest on all-fours.*)

[arliganzey]

Zey/Vau? 👀👀👀

all right all right I dropped hints here and

and now I gotta explain myself

Folks, this was supposed to be a crackship RP between @the-pyromaniacs-teki and me. We were all like teehee let's write Vau and Zey slash, it's crack taken seriously. Yeah, okay, so we took it very seriously and tried to keep them in character as much as possible and fit it into the canon timeline, and now it consumes our entire beings. We're married to it and there's nothing you can do to change our minds.

It starts right after the events of Triple Zero: Zey has a bottle of vintage whiskey and he determines Vau might appreciate trying it, so he invites Vau to his office for a celebratory drink after a successful mission (this would happen the night that Kal and the gang go out with Obrim and CSF). So Vau has just had the crap beat out of him by Atin, but he shows up anyway (it's a social call and he is a gentleman who honors his commitments).

They drink whiskey too fast. They're chatting. Zey is like maybe I can fix your face? And... the rest of you? (Having no idea what happened. Also Bardan had to learn Force healing from someone so I think Zey can Force heal. Mini headcanon moment.)

So a little face touching later... a little curiosity... too much whiskey... the taboo of kissing a Jedi/Mandalorian...

Look at my pfp. Now look back at me. It happens in Zey's office.

And they're like never again. But then they kind of obsess over it (separately) until Zey caves and tracks Vau down. Happens again. Zey, the detached Jedi, suggests a casual arrangement, because how the hell could Walon Vau develop feelings for a Jedi?

So they meet up a few more times and have a steamy com call or two during the war. (Alicia Keys song 'IT'S A WAAAR TIIIME LOOOVE AAAAFFAIR') Vau teaches Zey some mando'a... because Zey knows lots of conversational bits of various languages for diplomacy reasons, but he should definitely learn more mando'a because the troops are always speaking it...

There's a pretty long lull in contact (8ish months) and then Zey cuts things off abruptly during the events of Order 66, right after the conversation where he asks Vau to spy on Kal. And it's not great! They both caught some feelings! War is stressful and it was some escapism comfort! But Zey is a jerk about it and insists it was all casual and meant nothing!

Insert all canon events here (Zey arrives at Kyrimorut with Maze; Vau is PISSED and argues with Kal about it; Zey gets sent off to Altis).

Are you still with me? Okay this is where we just went straight up indulgent. First of all, Etain lives. Whew. Zey gets to meet Venku. He still cries. Everyone at Kyrimorut is a lot happier in general, and slightly more accepting that Zey is alive.

One way or another, Vau and Zey keep crossing paths (because Zey wants to hang out with his former employee-children Etain and Bardan). Vau and Zey soften toward each other and suddenly they're spending more time together as friends and then wham, Vau has a near death experience on a job and decides to stop farting around because life is short. He gets back together with Zey.

ARE YOU STILL WITH ME? OKAY SO THEY ARE OLD GUYS IN LOVE. EVENTUALLY ZEY GOES FULL MANDO. BARDAN (NOW AN ARMOR SMITH) MAKES HIM ARMOR. THIS IS HOW WE GET ARLIGAN ZEY IN MANDALORIAN ARMOR!!! HE BECOMES FULL HOUSEHUSBAND MANDO AND LEARNS HOW TO COOK AND JUST VIBES AND HAS HOBBIES AND MAKES SOCIAL CALLS WHILE VAU KEEPS WORKING BOUNTIES

"But Cal--" NO I GET IT. I KNOW IT'S INSANE. BEGONE [smashes my Zey and Vau dolls together] NOW KITH

[twig-tea]

Hi Twig!

I have a burning thought I needed to share. Aren't T-aras and themes surrounding them in this adaptation of Love in the Big City somewhat similar to the ones for Diary of Tootsies bunch? Or at least I feel like there are some parallels to be drawn here. I don't know if it's the presence of Kylie or like the importance of the support group (and what they do and don't share with each other) but I sense a weird connection. And I know in LITBC we concentrate on one character while in the DoT the focus is distributed rather equally (not to mention the whole tonal difference and the unhinged factor) but it's been running through my mind all day.

Hi Kat! I can totally see why Diary of Tootsies would be brought to mind when watching Love in the Big City, especially around the T-aras and the club scenes and Kylie. Though Bangkok and Seoul are very different cities in very different countries, and these stories take place in very different times in each of their countries' HIV prevention histories (Diary of Tootsies takes place years after PreP was approved and made available in Bangkok though before it was made available at scale across the country, while LitBC takes place before PreP was approved or covered by public health in Korea), there is something about the queer club scenes and found family that feels relatable across many cultures and decades. Other shows that also come to mind include of course GayOK Bangkok (Thailand), Getaway (Singapore), Handsome Stewardess (Taiwan), and films like Himitsu no Nacchan (Japan). Just one of the things I find so relatable to my own queer friend groups and that is in both shows is how we can be so mean to each other, and how knowing where the line is shows how well you know each other.

A non-comprehensive list of some of the other similarities:

Group dancing to choreography

Gossiping about dick sizes, whether or not someone is into you, and whether or not they're worth seeing again

Keeping things light with your friends even when you're having a hard time

Your party friends visiting in hospital and making sure you know they're there for you and love you

Struggling with the closet, the judgment of family members, code switching depending on who you're with and where you are

The comfort of a gay club as a space to relax and unwind

Dating people who are judgmental of the club scene and of the person they're dating (especially of different ages)

Themes of loneliness, searching for love, and not feeling like you're enough

As a card-carrying Club Queer who has dances I would do with friends, I relate to a lot of these things, so I always get excited when this aspect of queerness is depicted in media (it is of course not universal or mandatory, I am also friends with queer folks who never have and never would set foot in a club). An upcoming show that has this vibe (but closer to Diary of Tootsies than LitBC in terms of the comedy/drama ratio based on the trailer), and which I am very excited for, is The Nipple Talk, which starts November 1 on GagaOOLala.

Thanks for dropping this in my ask box, it gave me an excuse to think and chat about some series that don't get a lot of attention! If you want to chat about this more, feel free to DM me, I'm always happy to chat shows.

[warabidakihime]

Resilience in the Rain

Characters: ADA!Dazai x Reader Synopsis: Amidst the downpour of life's trials, they found solace in each other's embrace within the quiet halls of the deserted Agency office. Alone, their love became a shelter in the storm, nurturing their resilience and kindling a flame of hope that could withstand any tempest. Trigger/Content Warning: This story contains themes of emotional distress, self-hatred, guilt, vulnerability, suicidal tendencies, self-harm, and suicide. It explores complex emotions and may depict scenes that involve these sensitive topics. If you or someone you know is struggling with these issues, please reach out to a mental health professional or helpline. A/N: I wanted to take a moment to chat with you about this fanfic. As someone who struggles with mental health, I've got a personal connection to the topic, and I really want to explore it in my own way. Mental health is important, and I want to raise awareness and offer some comfort to anyone who's going through a tough time.

Now, I gotta be real with you. This story touches on some heavy stuff. We're talking about emotions running wild, self-hatred, guilt, and all that messy stuff. It even dives into subjects like suicidal thoughts, self-harm, and suicide. But listen, I'm not here to glamorize or make light of these things. Instead, I wanna shed light on the struggles people face and emphasize the importance of seeking help and understanding.

While you're reading, please take care of yourself. If anything gets too overwhelming, reach out to a mental health pro or helpline. Remember, you're not alone, and there are folks out there who care and wanna help.

Thanks for joining me on this journey. Let's spread some awareness, empathy, and support for mental health, one chapter at a time!

P.S this wasn't proof read, so i'm sorry for any inconsistency. i was making this in the office lol.

-

The rain poured relentlessly, drenching the streets of Yokohama as the Armed Detective Agency headquarters stood steadfast amidst the downpour. After a particularly grueling mission, you couldn't contain your concerns and frustrations any longer. You found Dazai nursing his wounds in a dimly lit corner of the headquarters, a faint smile dancing on his lips. Meanwhile Kunikida and the others have already returned to their respectful dorms.

You approached him, your voice laced with worry. "Osamu, until when are you going to keep this up?"

Dazai glanced up, his eyes gleaming with mischief. "Ah, my dear Y/N, are you worried about me? How sweet. But rest assured, I'm always one step away from the edge, and yet, I remain standing."

Dazai, with his usual nonchalant demeanor, brushed off your very valid concerns with another dark joke, but this time, it only fueled the fire within you. Your frustration reached its boiling point, and your voice rose, shaking with sheer frustration.

"Osamu!" you shouted, your voice echoing through the room. "Enough with the jokes and deflections! This isn't a game! Do you even realize how much your self-destruction tears me apart? How useless it makes me feel that I can't do anything to help you, despite giving my all?"

Dazai's mask faltered, revealing a flicker of vulnerability as your words struck home. But before he could respond, you continued, your voice filled with raw emotion.

"I love you, damn it! I love you more than anything, and yet you push me away with your reckless behavior. How can you disregard your own life, knowing that I'm right here, willing to stand by your side? It hurts, Osamu, to see you care so little about yourself, even when you have someone who would give anything to keep you safe!"

Your voice wavered, tears streaming down your face as you poured out your heart. The room grew heavy with silence as the weight of your words hung in the air. The truth had been laid bare, leaving Dazai with no choice but to confront the pain he had inflicted.

Dazai's eyes widened, his carefree facade crumbling further. He reached out, but the words escaped him, his throat tight with remorse. The realization of the magnitude of his actions crashed over him like a tidal wave, shattering the walls he had built.

"I... I didn't..." Dazai stammered, his voice barely a whisper.

But you weren't done yet. You took a step closer, your voice filled with a mix of anguish and determination.

"I can't watch you destroy yourself anymore, Osamu," you said, your voice firm. "I can't keep picking up the pieces of your shattered soul, only for you to throw them aside again. You need to make a choice, for your own sake and your sake only. Don’t you think it’s time to break this vicious cycle?"

Dazai's eyes glistened with unshed tears, his mask finally crumbling completely.

Venom started to bubble in his throat, causing him to hesitate before opening his mouth. Regret, self-hatred, helplessness, and guilt devoured him as he gazed at you through seemingly indifferent eyes that now glistened with unshed tears. The weight of your words, the pain etched on your face, and the love that had long been overshadowed by darkness crashed over him, leaving him vulnerable and broken. 

In that moment, the walls he had built around his heart crumbled, and the armor he wore so proudly shattered, exposing the rawness of his emotions to the one person who had managed to touch his soul. You watched him, your heart aching but also hopeful. This was the moment of reckoning, the catalyst for change. You reached out, your hand hovering over his trembling shoulder, a silent offer of support.

"Osamu, my love," you said, your voice soft yet resolute. "You and I both know this can't go on. Sooner or later, we have to move forward. I'm not rushing you to heal, but I am urging you to start. Not just for me, but most especially for yourself."

The room fell into a heavy silence as Dazai wrestled with his emotions. Tears welled up in his eyes, the weight of his actions crashing down upon him. He sank to his knees, his trembling hands covering his face, trying to hold back the flood of emotions threatening to consume him.

In that vulnerable moment, you approached him, your heart breaking for the man you loved. You knelt down beside him, your hand gently resting on his shoulder. Dazai looked up, his tear-streaked face revealing the pain he had long kept hidden.

"I'm sorry, Y/N," he choked out, his voice raw and filled with regret. "I didn't realize how much my actions were hurting you. I never intended to make you feel useless or unimportant."

You swallowed the lump in your throat, your own tears mingling with the raindrops falling outside. "Osamu, it's not about being useless. It's about sharing the burden and supporting each other through the darkest moments. I can't fix you, but I can be there for you. But you have to let me in."

Dazai clutched at your hand, his grip desperate yet filled with hope. "Y/N, I know where you're coming from; it's just that I've been a coward, avoiding the truth about myself and my emotions. I've been a bigger idiot for finding comfort in stagnation. But I don't want to be that person anymore. I want to face my fears, confront my flaws, and become the best version of myself."

The weight of his words hung in the air, a fragile promise of a brighter future. You both knew that healing wouldn't happen overnight and that the journey ahead would be filled with challenges and setbacks. But as you looked into Dazai's eyes, you saw a newfound determination, a flicker of the man he could and can become.

The rain had finally ceased, leaving behind a tranquil atmosphere in the aftermath of the storm. The Armed Detective Agency headquarters, once filled with tension, now carried a sense of calmness. You and Dazai found yourselves seeking serendipity in each other's presence, finding comfort in the quiet moments shared between the two of you.

As the last rays of moonlight filtered through the window, casting a gentle glow across the room, you approached Dazai. Your eyes met, and a silent understanding passed between them. Without a word, you reached out and cupped his face tenderly, your thumb caressing his cheeks.

With a tender smile, you closed the distance between you, your lips meeting in a gentle yet passionate kiss. It started as a simple connection, a way to affirm your love and draw strength from one another, as well as a promise that you would never, ever leave his side. As the kiss deepened, fueled by the pent-up emotions and desire, it threatened to escalate into something more fervent.

Yet, in that moment of intense connection, you pulled away, your breath mingling with Dazai's. You gazed into each other's eyes, your chests rising and falling in synchrony. You continue to graze your fingertips on Dazai's cheek, tracing the lines of his face as if committing every detail to memory.

He leaned into the touch, a soft sigh escaping his lips. The weariness of the day, both physically and emotionally, weighed heavily on you both. The two of you had weathered the storm together and fought your battles, and now it was time to find solace in each other's arms.

His eyes searched yours, his gaze filled with a mixture of love, possessiveness, and a tinge of insecurity. His emotions, usually hidden behind a facade of nonchalance, were now laid bare before you.

"I love you, Y/N," Dazai whispered, his voice tinged with a hint of desperation. "More than anything in this world, I can't bear the thought of losing you."

His words, filled with a newfound intensity, sent shivers down your spine. His usual cool and collected aura had transformed into a mix of passion and a touch of distress.

But instead of being scared or overwhelmed, you welcomed and embraced his heightened emotions. You understood that Dazai's love for you was profound, a force that consumed him and left him vulnerable. And you were more than ready to reciprocate, to ease his worries and soothe his restless soul.

"Osamu," you whispered, "I'm here, right here with you. I'm not going anywhere."

His grip on you tightened ever so slightly, as if afraid that you might disappear if he let go. You leaned in, your lips grazing his ear as you whispered, "You are the only one for me, Osamu. No matter what happens, I'll always be by your side."

As your words sank in, Dazai's tense posture began to relax. He realized that his fears and insecurities were unwarranted and that you were steadfast in your love for him. With a mix of relief and renewed determination, he kissed you once more, his lips conveying a mixture of passion and adoration.

The world around you faded away, leaving only the two of you immersed in a bubble of love and trust. The room seemed to melt into a blur of colors as your bodies swayed with an unspoken rhythm, your connection deepening with every touch and caress.

As the kiss finally broke, you both were left breathless, your foreheads still pressed together. Dazai looked into your eyes, a mixture of vulnerability and adoration shining through his gaze.

"I don’t deserve you; you’re way too precious for someone like me, but thank you for loving me despite my flaws and for seeing the best in me. I promise to cherish you, protect you, and be the best version of myself for you," he murmured, his voice filled with reverence and devotion.

As tears welled up in your eyes, you were overcome by the profoundness of his words and the genuine emotion in his voice. "Deserve is such a powerful word, Osamu. There are countless individuals who are just as imperfect as we are, yet that doesn't automatically make us inherently wicked, right? I love every aspect of you, the parts you deem as flaws and virtues alike," you declared, your voice brimming with unwavering love.

Your words hung in the air, wrapping around them like a promise. In that intimate moment, both of you found strength, renewal, and a shared understanding. You knew the path ahead wouldn't be easy, but together, you were ready to face the challenges and forge a future built on love, trust, and healing.

With a smile, Dazai leaned in once again, capturing your lips in a gentle yet passionate kiss. It was a celebration of your love and an affirmation of the bond you had forged through the trials you faced.

And in that transformative moment, Dazai Osamu felt the weight of his burdens lift, liberated from the shackles that had bound him for so long. And it was all thanks to you.

-

After an eventful day at the ADA office, you and Dazai finally retreated to the comfort of your apartment, seeking peace and quiet. The chilly evening air prompted you to opt for a heartwarming hotpot dinner, a perfect choice to warm your souls.

As you set the table with an array of fresh ingredients and fragrant broths, Dazai made a sly gesture, revealing a hidden stash of sake. Your eyebrows shot up in a mixture of surprise and amusement, realizing the ungodly amount of alcohol he had squirreled away. With a deadpan expression, you couldn't help but playfully scold him for his excess.

You knew that part of Dazai's healing journey involved acknowledging and breaking free from his unhealthy habits, and excessive drinking was one of them. With genuine concern, you made it clear to him that going forward, he needed to be mindful of his alcohol intake. Dazai's playful pout surfaced, but beneath it, he understood and appreciated your intentions. He promised to be more mindful of his health, realizing the importance of taking care of himself.

As the evening unfolded, the apartment filled with a harmonious symphony of laughter and lighthearted banter. You and Dazai reveled in each other's company, sharing inside jokes and good-natured jabs. The stresses of the day melted away, replaced by a sense of comfort and contentment.

With every hearty slurp of hotpot and every sip of sake, the bond between you grew stronger. The shared meal became a symbol of nourishment not only for the body but also for the soul. As the day drew to a close, you found solace in the simple pleasures of being together, basking in the warmth of laughter and the undeniable connection that bound you.

[shadowphoenixrider]

Full House

(The morning after Shadow and Gambit's reunion, it's time for Shadow to face the music, and the other X-Men.)

News spread quickly through the X-Mansion that I'd returned, courtesy of Logan and Jean, and it hadn't taken long at all for Scott to appear to Remy's door, unable to hide the smile tugging at the corner of his lips as he glimpsed me cloaked in one of Gambit's shirts.

Both Remy and I looked like kids caught with our hand in the cookie jar, but Scott just offered to unlock my dorm door so I could get a proper change of clothes. He also gently asked if it would be okay if I came and chatted with him and the rest of the team during breakfast.

Which was how I found myself in the kitchen, surrounded by the X-Men, and Gambit sitting beside me with a comforting hand on my waist.

"Took you two bozos long enough." Jubilee commented, pinching her fingers together. "I was this close to staging an intervention!"

"Doubt it woulda worked, kiddo." Logan grunted from his place at the counter. "Both of them were too stubborn to see it."

"You're one to talk." Gambit ground out behind his teeth, netting him quite the death glare from the older man.

"Now now," Hank lifted his large, placating hands, "whilst an intervention may certainly have spared some of the heartbreak, love is an emotion with considerable volatile unpredictability. As much as we wish it otherwise, we often need to let it take its course, as fast or slow as it may be."

"Might I remind you that we're not here to discuss Shadow and Gambit's relationship?" Storm cut in, with a tone that was both breezy and yet commanding, her ice blue eyes sweeping over the room like a monarch surveying her kingdom.

"Storm's right folks, settle down." Scott said, coming to stand in front of me, a steaming cup of coffee in his hand. "It is good to see you again, Shadow." He began, a small smile tugging at his lips. "You were only gone a couple of weeks, but we all keenly felt your absence." His head and what I assumed was his gaze tilted towards the tall man next to me. "Some more than others."

"But do not think it was your healing gifts we missed, Shadow." Storm spoke, a gentleness to her voice even as it brimmed with conviction. It reflected in her ice blue eyes. "Whilst there was a definite absence felt, it was your company that was yearned for above all."

"Yeah." Jubilee folded her arms, leaning against the table. "After you left, your friends stopping coming too. It got real quiet here."

I blinked, surprised.

"Wait, really?"

Gambit nodded silently.

"Makes sense though." Rogue spoke. "Why stick around when the reason they had to hang around weren't here any more?"

"But I thought..." I frowned. "What about Lemming? Wasn't he working as admin here?"

"Stuck around the longest, but he were as loyal as the rest of your crew." Logan said, working a small thin stick around in his mouth. "Comes back from time to time to do his hours, but his heart is with you and your gang." He stared at me, a slight smile on his gruff features. "Gotta say, quite the loyalty you inspire, bub."

"Mmm." Cyclops hummed, nodding. "When you left, it was as if we'd lost Morph again." He paused for a moment. "The only good thing was that you were still alive."

He looked down, staring into his coffee. Jean reached out to touch his arm.

"I..." My turn to stare at the table. "I'm sorry."

"Dere no need to apologise, chère." Gambit said, his hand rubbing against my back. "Ya did what ya had to."

"I would like to address it, though." Scott said, and I looked up, meeting his ruby gaze. "Your feelings, in the wake of what happened to the Professor."

"You sure 'bout diggin' up old bones, Slim?" Logan growled lowly.

"Yeah, don' know if dis be a good idea..." Gambit agreed, shifting on his seat.

"It's alright." I butted in, looking between the two men, placing my hand on Gambit's. "The bones aren't that old, and the only way to treat an abscess is to open it up to drain the pus."

"And my concern is that if we don't treat this wound now, it's going to turn septic." Scott added, and I smiled as I met his gaze. He'd been picking up more from Hank and I than I'd realized. Scott gestured with his mug towards me. "So...?"

I sighed. Well, here we go.

"Sure it's no big surprise that I'm not on the same level as the rest of you." I began, letting my gaze drift over the other assembled mutants. "I'm weaker, less athletic, can only just about swing a sword around, and my powers have barely any offensive capability. There's no way I'd ever be able to measure up to any of you in that regard. The only thing I have of worth to bring to the team is my ability to heal."

"That's not true!" Jubilee blurted out. "You-!"

Jean placed a hand on the teen's shoulder, smiling softly.

"I agree, but let her finish."

"But...!"

"Come, petite, let's not leave a story half-told, non?" Gambit smiled at her, convincing a reluctant Jubilee to let me continue.

"True or not, being able to heal was the only thing I saw as making me eligible to be one of the team with the rest of you. In every other sector except mission support and research work with Hank, I was nothing more than a burden, always having to be babysat in the Danger Room." I lifted a shoulder. "Sure, I had my sword, but I wasn't good with it. So I put my all into being support, being your medic. I didn't mind that. I prided myself on it."

"So when your abilities were challenged by Professor's Xavier neurological injuries, and you were unable to deliver a satisfactory outcome..." Hank murmured, trailing off. I nodded.

"Yup, got it in one." I stared at the table again, propping my chin up on my interlaced hands. "The one time I really, truly had to save someone, and I couldn't. I failed to save one of the most important mutants to us and mutant-kind. And to make it worse, it was because of a rule I put on myself!" My hands curled into fists, soft trills of pressure-pain coming from the joints that were now locked tightly together. I pushed them aside. "If I knew how to heal brain injuries, I could have saved him! Instead I just..."

I took a breath, pressing my forehead into my knuckles to swallow down the flare of emotion that rose in me, stinging at my eyes. I released it, slow and steady, unknotting my fingers and stretching them out. The trilling faded.

"I just had to watch him die, with the rest you. I felt like a failure. I still feel like a failure, even now. He took me under his wing to protect me, gave me food, lodgings, and a stipend, and what did I do to repay him? Let him die."

"Dat ain't true, chère." Gambit said firmly. "Ain't what you did at all."

My gaze snapped to him, a retort on the tip of my tongue when Rogue interjected:

"Remy's right, Shadow." She folded her arms, straightening her back. "If you call what ya did 'letting' him die, I hate to see ya fightin' to save someone."

To my surprise, murmurs of agreement sounded out around me.

"If I remember correctly," Jean said, "it was the Professor himself who told you to stop working so he could wish us goodbye. You fought until the very end."

"Indeed!" Hank nodded. "Whilst your treatments were palliative rather than curative, you expended most of your power to keep the Professor not only alive, but comfortable. If not for your Herculean efforts, Xavier might not have survived long enough for Magneto to join us to call for Lilandra, which in turn saved his life, even if he is not physically present with us anymore."

"But he-" My protest was cut short when Hank shook his head.

"Perhaps Professor Xavier was clinically deceased for a few moments. But only a few, before Shi'ar technology revived him." Hank smiled. "It does not matter if your actions alone were found wanting, if the outcome was positive regardless." He frowned thoughtfully for a moment, stroking his chin with his claws. "Shadow, if an emergency physician becomes exhausted in the performance of external cardiopulmonary resuscitation, and has to hand-over to their colleague, if that colleague ends up restoring spontaneous circulation, does that make the previous physician a failure?"

"No!" I shook my head. "No. They tried their best, they were just exhausted."

"Exactly. You personally might not have been the architect of saving the Professor's life. But through your efforts, you kept him alive long enough so he could be."

It felt like my whole world tilted on its axis. All this time...I hadn't failed at all?

"I...I just..." I couldn't grasp the words with the enormity of it all, of their faith in me. Their lack of disappointment.

"You put the Professor's survival solely on your shoulders." Scott pressed, stepping closer. "You had to save him because that is what you do. That is what you're good at." His expression softened with his voice. "So when you don't manage it, you lose your purpose." He tilted his head. "Sound about right?"

Words fully failed me then, and it was all I could do to nod as the emotions came roaring back. Except this time there was no holding it back, not when Scott had essentially read my feelings out to me if they had been nothing more than a script. My eyes burned as they filled with hot tears, my breath shuddering and heavy as a strangled sob tore itself from my throat. Gambit's arm looped around my waist and pulled me close into his body.

"Oh, sugah..." Rogue murmured.

"You are more than just a healer to us, Shadow." Storm said kindly. "You are a confidante, a friend." Through my blurred eyes, I glimpsed her angle her head towards someone. "More than a friend, in some cases."

"Indeed." Hank, now. He offered me a handkerchief, which I gratefully took with mumbled thanks. "Even if you were stripped of your powers, I would never dream of trading your partnership in my work, or your confidence in which to discuss theories of the biomedical nature."

"Yeah, who else am I gonna beat at Mario Kart?" Jubilee piped up. "Gambit?"

A chuckle bubbled out of me, and I felt the Cajun raise an eyebrow in her direction.

"Jus' keep talkin', petite." He drawled. Jubilee grinned mischievously back at him.

"It..." I swallowed hard, wiping away my tears as best I could. "It wasn't just that. I..." I couldn't bear to meet their eyes as I admitted it: "I thought you'd be mad at me."

A rippled 'what?!' sounded out amongst the assembled crew, including the man sitting next to me.

"Sugah, why'd we be mad at you?" Asked Rogue incredulously.

"Because it was the Professor." I forced my voice to be louder than a mutter, despite desiring more than anything to screw myself up into a little ball and vanish. I envied Miranda's invisibility. "You knew him so much better and longer than me, not to mention everything he did for mutant rights and this school and everything. A-And here's me, a fucking outsider, comes swanning in and cocks up healing him the one time I really needed to bring my A-game." Gambit's arm around me tightened slightly.

I dragged my gaze up to Scott and Jean. "I thought you would hate me, especially since you both knew him the longest."

They were shaking their heads before I'd even finished my sentence.

"No, of course not." Jean said, reaching out to touch my hand. "We'd never hate you for doing your best."

Scott nodded his agreement, before casting a look over the others.

"I think I can safely say that goes for everyone here too." A chorus of affirmatives and nods replied to him.

"But that's what you wanted to believe, weren't it?" Logan suddenly spoke up. His gaze was like steel, yet old. Knowing. "Easier to stomach people hatin' you for failing, then get pity you don't feel you deserve."

I nodded, and felt Gambit's grip tighten again, his head gently resting against mine.

"Explains why you got increasingly agitated despite Jean and I's attempts to comfort you." Scott said.

"You wanted us to be angry, so it would justify your self-hatred for 'failing'." Added Jean.

"Easier to run when ya don' think anyone gon' follow you." Gambit murmured, his voice rumbling through his chest.

"Ah. The evening Gambit found you outside, afflicted with hypothermia." Whilst Hank didn't say it, I felt the 'self-afflicted' hang in the air like a stain.

"'Xactly." Curling a finger under my chin, Gambit very gently lifted my head to look him, his red black eyes soft and tender. "You were runnin' again, weren't ya, chère?"

I wrapped my arms around myself, pulling my head away to stare at the floor.

"...Yeah. I...I couldn't bear it. So I ran away." Another squeeze from the Cajun.

"What changed your mind, Shadow? That made you return?" Storm asked. "I doubt it was your feelings for Gambit alone that brought you back to us, as strong as they may be."

"It was definitely the catalyst, but no, there was more to it." I traced the whorls of the wood grain on the table. "I tried to return to what my normal life was before I met you all. The hospital took me back as a 'gesture of goodwill' towards mutants after the Professor's 'death'." Logan snorted derisively. "Yeah, I know. Not worth the paper it was written on. Regardless, even if it was never definitively 'proved' I was a mutant, a lot of people saw me as one anyway."

"And it turns out that a place that has a procedure to report suspected mutant employees tends to attract people who dislike mutants. Who'd've thunk." I sighed bitterly. "I guess I was so human-passing I never noticed it, much to my shame. I will say, no-one was outright hostile to me, and interactions were polite, but they were cool in that way that you knew if there wasn't a HR department, they'd be saying something completely different. It was like being in high school again, completely iced out of every social circle and treated like a pariah."

"I am very sorry that happened to you, Shadow." Hank frowned, his tone friendly, yet a sharp edge was faint underneath it, not pointed towards me. "Are you still employed by them?"

"For now, but probably not for much longer." I said. "I know that's probably part of the reason they're isolating me - so I'll leave on my own accord, but..." I heaved out a sigh. "Fuck, after everything I've experienced here, I have no capacity for dealing with petty workplace politics."

"Indeed. It will be their loss for their foolishness." The doctor nodded.

"You have my sympathies, Shadow, but I'm not sure how this is relevant." Scott spoke, raising an eyebrow.

"Trying to go back to my old normal proved to me that I can't." I explained. "Being here, helping the team however I can, it's more than what I was doing." Raising my hand as Hank opened his mouth, I continued: "I know in my heart of hearts that I am doing good in my own way, but...it feels so...so intangible. I could see what I was doing here. See the wounds I closed, the tests Hank and I did, discovering new ways to fight the Sentinels when we trained."

I looked away, staring at a point on the wall. "Unless I suddenly get fit enough and pass the exams to become a paramedic and find someone who'd hire a mutant, I'll never do anything that feels like it matters, that makes a difference."

I smiled ruefully. "That and Ebak kinda...opened my eyes a little bit." My eyes shifted back to Gambit, watching me intently. "And gave me the push to really...reach for the things I want." Laying my hand out on the table, palm up, I smiled at him. "As that Bon Jovi song goes: 'to live while I'm alive'."

A smile spread across Gambit's lips as well, one that reached his eyes, and he placed his hand in mine, interlacing our fingers together.

"Not bad taste, chère." He commented. Jubilee snorted.

"You're sure not beating the 'old woman' allegations, Shadow." She arched an eyebrow at me, before dissolving into giggles as I stuck my tongue out at her.

"So aside from finally admittin' you and Gumbo have something goin' on," Logan drawled, giving me a bored look, "anything else you discovered? Sure hope it ain't that you can give Summers a run for his money in the speech department."

"Can it, Logan." Scott snapped. "Not the time."

Anger flashed across Logan's face, and I quickly raised my other hand:

"It's fine, Scott!" I said hurriedly. "I do need to get to the point." I squeezed Gambit's hand slightly, gathering my composure. "My point is, I didn't just come back for Remy." I lifted my chin up, meeting Scott's eyes behind his red glasses. "I'd like to rejoin the team. If you'll have me."

"What makes ya think we'd say 'no', sugah?" Rogue chuckled richly, grinning widely.

"Indeed." Jean smiled. "It was always the impression that you were leaving temporarily to clear your mind and make a more informed decision away from us."

"You are always welcome in my laboratory and in our life, Shadow!" Hank cried, smiling broadly. "I welcome your company. And your opinions on recent matters!"

"Steady on McCoy, let's not overwhelm the woman and make her change her mind." Logan commented, a small smile playing on his lips.

"That a 'yes', Wolvie?" Jubilee grinned at him. He grunted, shrugging.

"Yeah, well, someone needs to keep the rest of you in one piece." He arched an eyebrow, shooting a smirk at the Cajun. "That and Gumbo won't be sneaking out at all times at night to see her."

"Didn' know ya cared, Logan!" Quipped Gambit, grinning back at him.

"Hmph." Logan folded his arms. "Care more 'bout the security risk of leaving your window open to go chat your lady up."

"You are more than welcome back with us, Shadow." Storm smiled warmly. "As Rogue herself said, there is no reason to think we would refuse you. Both as a member of the team, and good friend."

I blushed brightly under their affection, ducking my head.

"T-Thank you. I...I just-"

"Felt like you needed permission, right?" Scott supplied.

"...Yeah." I nodded. He smiled, one that I think reached his obscured eyes.

"I know the feeling." He reached a hand out to me. "Then allow me to welcome you back to the X-Men, Shadow."

I clasped his hand to shake it, and felt Gambit press a kiss to my head.

"Welcome back, mon ombre." He rumbled deeply, the timbre of his voice brimming with affection.

"Th...Thank you." I smiled shyly, looking around the kitchen to each face of the X-Men. More people who called me friend. "All of you."

"You can have today to settle back in," Scott said, immediately back to business, "but tomorrow you'll be included in the drills with the rest of the team."

"If I may," Hank piped up, lifting a clawed finger, "I have identified a slight issue."

"Go on, Hank?" Scott frowned slightly.

"I presume you've returned to full-time employment, Shadow? Will you be able to make time for your duties around it?" The doctor asked.

"I will, one way or t'other." I replied. "Gonna submit a request for part-time hours later today, and see what they say. Either they grant me the request; in which I'll get the time, or they'll refuse me, or I'll be fired." I lifted a shoulder. "If they refuse me, I'll just hand in my notice. Life's too damn short for their nonsense."

Scott nodded.

"I'll take that into consideration."

"Have you discussed this with your parents?" Asked Storm.

"Not yet. I was gonna head home today and get things in motion with my work." I explained.

"Need a ride back, chère?" Gambit asked. I swore I saw Rogue roll her eyes out of the corner of my eye.

"Ah, it's okay," I smiled at him. "I know a guy. He's waiting for me to check in, and he can take me back."

"Then let's not keep him waiting." Scott spoke. "You're dismissed, team."

---

One quick call later, and Ebak was stepping out of the shadows of one of the X-Mansion's rooms, wrapping me up in a big hug.

"Hello Gremlin." He murmured affectionately.

"Hey big guy." I replied, squeezing him gently.

When I opened my eyes and stepped back, we were behind a set of trees I knew to be in my parents' neighbourhood, their bare branches reaching for the sky. The suburb was quiet except the distant chattering of the local starling flock as it roved from garden to garden.

"Can't get any closer?" I asked him as we stepped out onto the path, raised and cracked by the tree roots that snaked under it.

"I could get a little closer, but figured the walk would give us time to talk." Ebak smiled, gesturing for me to start off, falling into step with me on his hearing side. "So, m'dear, how'd it go?"

"Well, they let me back onto the team, so that's good, right?" I smiled shyly.

"You've decided to rejoin them?" He smiled warmly, quickly pulling me into a half-hug. "I'm glad."

"Yeah. Decided to grab life by the lapels, like you said." I met his dark brown eyes. "Do the things that I want to do."

"Mmm." He hummed, before smirking, eyes glinting. "I have pretty good ideas, don't I?"

"Oh my God, you are never letting me live down the 'hot shower on a hot day' thing, are you?" I groaned, to his laughter.

"Nope." He grinned widely. "Never."

"I changed my mind," I declared, "can I go back to being an only child again?" Ebak's laugh was a full belly one; a sound I loved to hear, even at my expense. "In seriousness though, I heard from Jubilee that you and the others that you stopped going to the mansion after I left. Was...was that because of me?"

He nodded.

"Myst said it didn't feel right for us to go there whilst you weren't, and we agreed." He explained. "Lemming stayed on the longest to work, and Miranda...has her own reasons, but all in all we stopped going when you did."

My heart dropped into a bucket of ice, the painful wave of guilt pulsing through my veins. No, that hadn't been my intention at all - I was supposed to leave the mansion and their company, not the others. I never wanted-

"I'm sorry." I breathed. "I-"

"Shh shh shh." Ebak moved over to me, taking hold of my upper arms. "Hush. No blaming yourself." He raised a finger as I tried to protest. "I'll tell Ber!"

"But El-"

"Don't 'but El' me, I'm being serious." He interjected. "This was an agreement between all of us, because even if it had been someone else like Miranda, Myst or Ber, we still wouldn't feel happy going to a place our friend felt like they had to leave." Ebak smiled. "Where'd you think we got all that free time to be with you?"

"I..." I grabbed and hugged him tightly, emotion overwhelming me once more. He embraced me just as firmly. "Thank you."

"You're welcome, Shad." My brother murmured softly. "We love you, you know?"

Tears pricked at my eyes.

"Y-Yeah. And I love you all so much too. I'm so lucky to have friends like you."

"And we're lucky to have you too." Ebak replied, patting my back before he pulled back. "Now c'mon. Let's get you back home before they send out a search party."

"You did tell 'em where I'd be, right?" I asked as we set off again. I remembered leaving a note...

"Well yes, but they're your parents. They're going to worry." Ebak smiled. "Just like we do."

"True." I nodded. Suddenly, a realization hit me like a lorry. "Oh...God."

"Hmm?" He hummed, arching his scarred eyebrow.

"I just realized." I groaned. "I gotta introduce Gambit to my parents at some point."

"Haha!" My brother barked out a laugh. "Good luck with that!"

"Thanks! Very reassuring!"

Ebak patted my back.

"It'll be fine, Shadow." He smiled. "He loves cats, doesn't he? They'll just need to see him with Spock, and they'll love him!"

"Uh huh, the six foot Cajun thief with a motorbike and penchant for being a flirt." I said flatly. "He'll go down real well next to Tom."

"Hehe, maybe." Ebak smiled knowingly at me, a sparkle in his eyes. "But that's not going to stop you, is it?"

I grinned widely.

"No. Not in the slightest."

[ragnarokhound]

hello i came here from ao3 which makes this kinda feel like i’m following a coworker home and letting myself into their house but i’ve been rereading all your jaytim fics yet again and am! not! normal about it! and i just wanted to say that i love love love the way you write jason so much. it’s also really fun starting with your first jaytim fic that’s more like general fanon jason and tim and then following the ways you flesh both of them out so much as you write more. i feel like the true jaytim shipper arc is using tim as the self insert at first bc jason hot but then realizing jason is the one with issues that kind of make him the best to dig into and chew on and yeah. i just really really love how you write him and i wanted to let you know! ah! ok bye!

HI?? I'M GONNA CRY???

omg okay first of all-- first of all, THANK YOU for letting yourself into my house, i left the key under the mat on purpose so that folks from ao3 could come in whenever and rummage through my fridge and chat about jay and tim and jaytim over tea and charcuterie with me, so, sincerely, thank you for fulfilling that dream for me <333

second of all, ah? aaahhh?? aaaahhhHHH???? I am the one who is not normal actually! Hearing that you're rereading ALL of my jaytim fics? TuT THANK YOU omg, I'm so happy that you like my evolving take on Jason!! Because you are very right - I barely knew who Tim and Jason were when I first started writing fic of them, and was (w)riding high on DEEPLY HORNY VIBES ALONE. Coming from Teen Wolf and Sterek, I think it's quite obvious how my fandom pipeline got me to that first fic lmao >.>

(popping some rambling about characters & writing under the cut:)

Tim is such a fun character, but I do find him more personally relatable, and I find Jason more personally attractive, fjdslfjsa so YEAH. YOU'RE SO RIGHT. My motto is, as ever, "Tim Drake gets what I want, and what I want is Jason Todd" so while I find writing Tim POV to be the most comfortable, I find Jason more fun to obsessively write about. I think about Jason a lot because, to me, Tim is also thinking about Jason a lot U_U You can really see the turning point where I started thinking about Jason as a character more fjdlsfjafd

(that dog fic was a distraction from an as of yet unfinished Friends w/Benefits -> Lovers WIP from Jason's POV... maybe someday I'll finish you...)

Jason is so cool (/literary /he's actually a dork). He has a lot of mixed emotions and motives and confusing traumas and life events to navigate. His death is one of THE most important moments in comic book history, a decisive turning point in tone and theme, and people just can't help themselves when it comes to him and that moment (and the crowbars. christ. how many times are we going to hand jason a crowbar and expect him to want to use it fdjslfsa I DIGRESS).

You can write Jason a lot of ways, because how do you even react to that? How do you even come to terms with your literal death and resurrection and the messy mcfreaking history you left behind and then came back to? It's believable when Jason is edgy and sexy and volatile, THE Bad Boy of the already Bad Boy Batman franchise - but it's equally believable when he's just a scared, secretly dorky kid who came back to a family that moved on without him, his murderer still out there and killing people who aren't lucky (?) enough to have cosmic connections. Even better to me when he's both lol

OKAY i'm done i swear, but you followed me home, you signed up for this lmao

THANK YOU AGAIN, omg, I remember your comments on ao3 too, thank you SO much for your kind words, both over there and now over here!! <33 TTuTT You're gonna make me waterworks, dude ;A; <333

[conkers-thecosy]

My ask about asks I forgot to send you.

I've seen many posts about people missing how common asks used to be so I have been trying to send about an ask a week. Now I send this ask first anytime I follow someone as I really don't want to bother anyone, so I'd love to know if you enjoy receiving asks and if so what kind of asks. Not having energy for asks or being comfortable with them is perfectly okay.

The categories I have in my ask notebook that I file under are in colour. Please feel free to make your response as long as you want or private (the asker cannot directly respond to private responses).

Self, Job/Work: please let me know what you are comfortable with from eh idk just ask it to nothing personal at all.

Baggishield/Tolkien, Dragon Age, Johnlock/Sherlock, ineffable spouses, other fandom: Please let me know what fandoms. I think my main fandoms and ships are Bagginshield/The Hobbit, Sherlock/Johnlock, Dragon Age Inquisition, {Pippin/Faramir Merry/Eowyn}/The Lord of the Rings and I dip my toes in a few that I currently can't remember but ships I don't engage with the canon of at all are: Good Omens but only for Crowley/Azirapheal, Stranger Things but only for Steve/Eddie , The Witcher but only for Geralt/Jaskier.

OC's you want to talk about

art/drawing do you draw and like to get asks about it?

your writing

blog specific only is your blog specific to a fandom or something that you only want asks about related things

Story snippets ideas and prompts: Do you like receiving them?

Pets: I'd love to know all about them

Garden and Hobbies: What type of gardening and/or hobbies?

Like being tagged in things: If so what kinds of things?

*Asks are sent for fun, no pressure to answer.

Hi there!!

I'm sorry this took me so long to answer - I know there's no pressure (which I appreciate immensely!) but I really want to answer them, I'm just super slow!

Self, Job/Work: Honestly I'm super happy to talk about anything like this! With all my social links on my pinned posts it wouldn't be too difficult to find out a lot of stuff about me and my life anyway! Baggishield/Tolkien, Dragon Age, Johnlock/Sherlock, ineffable spouses, other fandom: Okay so while I enjoy all of these fandoms, and more besides, I get real single-minded about my special interests. Right now it's Bagginshield, and that's really all my brain has room for! OC's: I would genuinely loooove to talk about my OCs, so very much! As I said above, bagginshield is really my main focus right now, but I have two half-written original novels that I really hope to pluck up the courage to share one day. Honestly I would love so much to have the opportunity to talk about them more here, but I know there's not a lot of interest. Folks are here for the bagginshield stuff, and that's totally fair! But, I'm going to write these stories either way and I really would love any excuse to gush about them and my OCs! art/drawing: I don't draw, I'm afraid! I wish I did, I'm always in so much awe of people who have that skill! I paint a bit, but not often and just for fun, and it's always some weird abstract stuff, haha! your writing: Love to talk about writing! It's all that keeps me going some days, and any excuse to chat about what I'm doing, what I'm planning, ro even giving advice to other writers is just so much fun to me! blog specific only: Nah, this blog is a mish-mash of everything! Happy to talk about whatever! Pets: So I have a dog! His name is Wilfred, and he was a rescue! He's my boon companion, and I love any excuse to show him off, haha! Garden and Hobbies: So I do garden, but I'm new to it! I never had a garden before until about 3 years ago, and it's been super fun to learn as I go! Other hobbies are funny, because I do a bit of everything. I'm fairly crafty so I've done pottery, sewing, jewellery making, painting as I mentioned, a bit of knitting, etc. I also used to have my own small business, running a perfumery, so I've made all sorts of bathing products, soaps, bath salts, candles, etc! Like being tagged in things: I do, but you may have noticed, I'm a bit slow at responding! I do try to keep on top of them and I never mind being tagged, but it ebbs and flows, for sure!

Okay, I think that's everything!!

Thank you so much for sending this! I will answer your others at some point, but my alarm has just gone off and now it's writing time, haha!

Thanks again for these lovely asks you send to people, it's really such a wonderful thing you're doing!

[bitsybunbun]

Hiiii! For those of us who are serial reposters, how would you recommend we start reaching out and making friends in the community?

Heya! I'm a shy bean and online friendships aren't my thing, but here's a few pointers based on my limited experience! Whether you're looking for friends on Tumblr, in a Fetlife group, a Reddit personals page (all of which can be good options!), or wherever else, I think there's some near universal ways to be kind and considerate in your search.

Be clear with your intentions right up front! If you're making a personals post, be really clear with what you're looking for, even if you're open to a range of things.

Be personable! If you're DMing someone, say more than just "hey" and talk about more than just your kinks. Introducing yourself and your interests and intentions right away makes it easier to connect. We can all bond over our hobbies and interests, and even if someone shares your kinks, they may feel more comfortable discussing vanilla things first.

Comment on people's posts! Friendly, relevant comments on my posts almost always make me happy, random DMs from strangers almost never make me happy. This might just be a personal preference, but if I'm chatting with someone in the comments of a post I'll feel much more comfortable chatting with them in DMs later on.

Take "no" for an answer! If someone doesn't seem interested, move on. Pestering someone is not a good way to make friends. Keep an eye out for soft "no"s, like not responding and not answering questions.

Again this is all from my limited viewpoint, I hope it was at least a little helpful! I know some folks find community on Discord, Twitter, or in-person events as well, but I'm less familiar with these.

Best of luck on your friendship search, I'm cheering you on!

[pupintransit]

Hey folks! My little corner of the internet has been getting a lot of attention lately, so I'll start by saying I appreciate everyone who is leaving comments across here and Bluesky, and to the folks who have been asking me about my experiences. It's rewarding to be able to chat with folks about a trans experience they aren't familiar with, and even to help others on their own journeys. So, thanks <3

I do get a handful of questions more than others though, and I know that not everybody is going to feel comfortable reaching out privately to ask stuff, or will have the time to go through my archive of blog posts to find an answer to what they may be curious about it. To that end, I've decided to write a FAQ about my experience with my gender identity and with my gender affirming surgery. This is a living document and will be updated as we go.

1: WHAT SURGERY DID YOU GET?

I opted for penile-inversion full-depth vaginoplasty, and saw Dr. Brassard at GRS Montreal for the procedure. My care at their site was suberb, and I have absolutely no regrets!

2: ARE YOU ON ANY HORMONES?

Yup! I take testosterone injections once a week. I have no plans to begin estrogen or any other feminizing hormones. The testosterone is to maintain my masculine gender presentation and keep my bones healthy.

3: WHAT IS YOUR BMI?

At the time of surgery my BMI was 37. GRS Montreal had a cap of 40, although most other places hover around 35. Check with your surgical team if they have any BMI or weight restrictions!

4: ARE YOU A TRANS MAN?

Nope! I was assigned male at birth. I used to call myself an AMAB trans masc, and while I think it's still a useful label to describe my experiences, it is (ahem) a touch controversial. I try to avoid introducing myself that way now and opt for simply nonbinary instead.

5: WHY DID YOU GET BOTTOM SURGERY?

For as long as I can remember I hated my penis and testes. They were in the way, they looked so strange being affixed to me, and having/seeing the buldge they created in my pants made me feel like such a creep. Growing up girls made me jealous because they had vulvas, and when I learned what trans men were in my late teens that envy intensified because they essentially had my dream body; a man with a pussy. I was well on my way to thirty before I realized what I was experiencing was dysphoria, and learning that I could do something about it without being femme was an incredible relief. It's easily been the best decision I've ever made.

6: WHAT DOES SEX AND MASTURBATION FEEL LIKE?

I dunno about sex just yet, but I can tell you with confidence that being penetrated with a dildo feels amazing! And don't even get me started on clitoral stimulation, holy shit. It's like everything that isn't your body just vanishes. You become a vessel for sexual pleasure. My penis never made me feel like that, and I don't miss it.

7: CAN YOU ORGASM?

Yup! I feel the same muscles contract that I did when I had a penis, only now it's focused on a smaller area due to how those muscles were rearranged during the surgery. I don't always cum, but when I do it's much thinner than it was with my penis, and doesn't rocket out of me like it used it. Instead it kind of flows out like a river.

8: WHAT WERE THE STEPS TO GET BOOKED FOR SURGERY?

I had to obtain a single surgical readiness assessment (basic informed consent stuff) in addition to getting everything okayed health-wise by my general practitioner and my surgery team. Once the assessment was sent in, my surgical team got in touch and a few back and forth phone calls later I was booked!

Some countries and clinics have different requirements, so this might be universal to your experience. Double check what you need to acquire before making any appointments!

9: WERE YOU ON HORMONES BEFORE SURGERY?

Nope! The new WPATH standards indicate that it's no longer a strict requirement, but having said that some countries and clinics are still picky about it. Double check what those requirements may be for your region before booking anything!

10: WHAT WAS RECOVERY LIKE?

Sucked! A lot! People heal in different ways and I am not remotely qualified to tell people how to avoid or mitigate pain. If you've ever had an invasive surgery before I'd wager it'd be comparable, but that's a question better geared toward your regular doctor.

11: DO YOU STILL DILATE?

Not only do I still dilate, I will have to dilate for the rest of my life. It's not comfortable per se, but the more you heal the easier it gets and the less often you have to do it. It genuinely isn't as big a downside as people think.

12: WHAT KIND OF BOTTOM SURGERY SHOULD I GET?

If you have to ask that means you're not sure if you want this, so the answer is none of them. At least for now. Take the time to unpack why you're considering lower surgery, and see a gender-affirming therapist who can help guide you. While the regret rate for gender affirming care is miniscule at best, it can still happen and you need to be prepared for what you're getting into. This is not an easy decision to make even when it's the correct one, and it's certainly not an easy recovery. "I don't know" isn't good enough.

13. HOW IS PEEING?

It's normal. I was fortunate enough not to experience any complications with urination or my urethra. Apart from being more prone to UTI's than I was with my penis (and having to get using to wiping after peeing) everything went according to plan. Don't take my experience as a given though, because complications can and do happen!