#I know it's been five years shut up

[scrapyardwarlocks]

This is my Braime rant.

Oh, hello there. Yes, it's been a few years, and I'm still thinking about the GOT finale. When people talk about it, it's mostly to roast Bran getting the throne or Daenerys turning evil because of a bell tower (both extremely valid), BUT I am forever the most salty about the way Jaime and Brienne's story ended. Like...????????

First, I must acknowledge that there are the Tormund x Brienne shippers. I suppose their relationship could’ve gotten more emotionally complex if given the chance, but we only see Tormund horny boy howling because of Brienne's size and strength. In huge contrast, Jaime Lannister’s connection to Brienne goes much further than a surface-level attraction to a large, powerful woman.

They fundamentally changed each other for the better in HUGE ways:

Brienne's relationship with Jaime gave her a sense of agency she never had before. He gave her the opportunities and tools to fulfill exactly what she wanted to be. He developed an unwavering trust in her judgment and skills as a knight that she hadn’t really experienced before. A feminist king, if there ever was one (after a personal growth journey, of course).

Brienne allowed Jaime to see his potential as an honorable man. He opened up to her emotionally in a way he’s done with no one else (except maybe his brother Tyrion?) Although she wasn’t the only reason he decided to defy his sister and do what’s right, she certainly had a monumental impact on his self-worth and morality.

Even when they were firmly on opposite sides, they still advocated and protected each other. Jaime lost the hand he used for sword fighting, and he fought a BEAR for her, for God's sake.

And you can't argue that they didn't have a physical and emotional connection. The amount of unadulterated, obvious yearning is insane, y’all. Right in front of everyone's salad.

I mean, Brienne willingly gives him her virginity, something she’s been vehemently defending her whole life. She allowed him to see her at her most vulnerable. But then...

Jaime decides to go back to King's Landing to protect his sister at the last moment. Keep in mind, he had already fully betrayed Cersei just a few episodes beforehand. In the end, he dies in his emotionally abusive sister’s arms, and the show implies that she's the woman he truly loves... it's genuinely vile to me.

If Jaime had stayed in the same place he was in season one, the exact same thing would've happened to him in the end. So... WTF was the point? What was the point of all that inner conflict, emotional growth, meaningful connection? Jack squat, according to the writers and the footnote dedicated to him in the King's Landing records. 

What lesson are we supposed to learn from this, huh? No matter how hard you try to grow and change, what you were born into will always drag you back? You should stay in a toxic relationship, no matter how destructive, because you still feel like you love them? People who have made mistakes in the past don't deserve a second chance at life? That is what I got with the end to Jaime's story.

Thank you for your time, your honor.

[uncanny-tranny]

I know for a fact I've talked about the golden records, but I don't care because here is a sample of some of my favourite greetings on those discs

There is something so vulnerable, precious, and human about sending up pieces of our hearts into space. Even when we know that there may not be anybody out there to hear us, we are still whispering to whomever might listen how much we love them, how much we want to connect. No matter how small the chance is, we're taking it to say that love is real, that we are real.

How is that not something to be in awe over?

[enobariasteeth]

I genuinely don't understand how people can see what's going on in Palestine and not side with the Palestinian people. It makes me nauseous everytime I come online, seeing the new atrocities, and then seeing people excusing it/denying it.

[pussymasterdooku]

have about 60% of a single functioning hand these days and got tired of humiliating myself trying to open pill bottles when eva’s in the office so she fixed me up good with Easy Open Mini Ricotta Container Filled With Ritalin And Ibuprofen. accessibility win!

[ereborne]

Song of the Day: December 14

“He Set Her Off” by Emily Ann Roberts

[sapphroditewrites]

workin on a little gift for the holidays for y'all bc i'm so damn slow with the affair au (which i've weirdly started writing backwards? it's funny how that helps sometimes, but it's helped a lot)

it's not gonna be super polished and spit-shined like i usually try for, but it's something i was hoping to get around to every year, if that doesn't spoil the surprise lol

[folkinsomnia]

screaming myself hoarse til I pass out we were together during a very tumultuous time in our lives I will always have your back and be curious about you about your career your whereabouts!!!

[scorndotexe]

riley's monologues especially make me want to gouge my eyes out

[cryptidsdad]

the dream daddy crop top being sold out/never restocked is my villain origin story … but I want ya’ll to consider robert in a shirt like that 😌

[aro-aizawa]

the fact that i really love doing organisational stuff is literally the only thing that does not align with adhd and i feel like a sham when i say “man i really love organising stuff!!!” lol doesn’t mean that i’m good at sticking to it and i doing it super often. i just,,, i really like how satisfying it is, and its way easier to do organising digitally for example all this to say that i fkn love spending hours on end rearranging files and setting up a system so that my files look so neat

[ajaxgb]

Okay no I need to talk about the book version of Howl's Moving Castle. I love the movie but the book has such a different vibe and you, yes you, should read it.

Movie Howl is a soulful and quiet. Book Howl is a drama queen and Causing Problems and has a long string of jilted exes and couldn't shut up if you paid him.

Sophie and Howl drive each other up the wall at the beginning and it's really funny. Sophie and Howl are (despite themselves) very much in love by the end and they still drive each other up the wall and it's even funnier.

In the movie, Howl has been ordered by the king to participate in The War, and Howl is avoiding it because he is a brave conscientious objector. In the book, Howl has been ordered by the king to rescue his lost brother from the Witch of the Wastes, and Howl is avoiding it by any means necessary because he is a cowardly weasel who wants to stay as far from the Witch as possible.

In the movie, the Witch cursed Sophie because she was jealous about Howl speaking to Sophie for five minutes. In the book, the Witch cursed Sophie because Sophie had been doing surprisingly powerful magic for years without knowing it and it was actually starting to cut into the Witch's plans. (Sophie does not discover any of this until nearly the end of the book, but the reader can start to pick it up much earlier and the way Sophie's magic works is pretty darn cool.)

In the movie, there's a rumor that Howl eats the hearts of maidens, but this is implied to be nothing but nasty fearmongering. In the book, there's a rumor that Howl eats the hearts of maidens because Howl started the rumor so people would stop asking him to do wizard junk all the time.

The book lightly parodies a couple of tropes from Western fairy tales. In particular Sophie has internalized that, as the eldest of three sisters, her "destiny" is to fail so that her younger sisters will look cooler when they succeed, which is why she's so resigned to the hat shop at the beginning. (Sidebar: Sophie's sisters come up much more in the book and they're great.) There's also a really funny bit where Sophie attempts to operate a pair of seven-league boots.

In the movie, the fourth and final location that the magic door connects to is some sort of black void / mindscape / time portal dealy. In the book the fourth location is Wales, in the UK, on Earth, so that Howl can visit his family, because from Howl's perspective this is an isekai story.

[itsahotminuteinbetween]

just going to keep hoping that one day, things will get better

[chickenbyday]

Cringefail moment

[pepperyduck]

a/n: drabble about satoru aging bc he would’ve been 35 today. not old but it’s enough to begin showing the signs of aging. i love him. not proofread!

satoru is going grey.

thirty-five years old, and he’d never, not once, thought he’d ever go grey—with the whole white hair thing, you know?

but those dreams are absolutely crushed as he looks in the mirror, getting ready for the birthday dinner you had planned for him. you walk into the same shared bathroom, catching your husband’s downright agonized stare in the glass.

“babe, we’re going to be late. can you put on your tie please—.”

“not right now,” he interrupts, all too dramatically, “i’m having a crisis.”

“what? what’s wrong?” your voice is filled with worry, pacing towards your husband to turn him towards you.

satoru looks back in the mirror and parts his hair in one specific way, then turns back and leans down to push his scalp right in your face. eyebrows tweaking, you stare at his pale hair trying to find a trace of blood or something—but you don’t see anything.

“what are you talking about?”

“i’m getting old!���

“what? you just turned 35 today, what are you—,”

“i’m going grey! i’m getting old!” he whines, throwing his hands up and leaning back away from you. pursing your lips in frustration, you stare at your husband in the mirror disappointedly.

but then, you see it. one tiny, barely darker than pure white, grey hair poking out of satoru’s locks. and that’s not the only thing that shows his signs of aging. he’s got small crow’s feet forming from all his laughter and grins over the years. smile lines, too. tiny wrinkles litter his face all over from his many expressions he always does, the repetitive motions finally starting to show on his skin.

he’s become just a tiny bit forgetful, and his hearing has diminished just the littlest pinch. he has reading glasses because his perfect blue eyes finally gave into the years and he sees less than 20/20. satoru gets backaches now, he groans loudly when he sits down or stands up.

satoru’s aged, of course. he is still the most beautiful person in the world to you. the signs of his age showing are nothing less than endearing, they are signs of all the happiness and joy and experiences he’s had. even at his not actually old age, he is beautiful.

but you have a dinner to attend.

you pluck the hair right out of his head, a stinging pain coming to the root of satoru’s scalp for just a second.

“ow! what the hell? i wanted to keep that!”

“shut up and put your tie on, old man.”

[swagging-back-to]

huge shoutout to the birds outside my window who sound like they're being murdered and like velcro being ripped apart over and over again. since literally 4am.

[lunaticamic]

find yourself a sports nerd. really