#I know it's acting but...it still bothers me

[kinardsevan]

i wrote a whole ass psychology breakdown (for the first time in FOREVER) about the break-up. enjoy (if you so choose):

so I've been reading a lot in relation to Tommy's speech during the break-up (and have actually gotten through the scene several times now, mostly as a creative reference for these fix-it fics. I think one of the first things that I've seen completely tossed aside (that bothers the shit out of me as someone with over a decade of therapy treatment and a psychology degree) is whatever trauma Tommy carries.

We know that there are issues with his dad. We know Lou's lore behind him is that he spent a lot of his childhood alone. We don't know anything in relation to his mom, but she may or may not be the cause of more trauma. We know that his way of dealing with abuse of authority is to shut down and follow the leader, which is likely a mix of his military time and growing up in his father's household (and when I say this, I mean from what we saw of him under Gerrard's command). This is a person who has put years into getting himself into some version of okay after all that he's endured, and we know he still generally does it on his own.

To that end, here, have my breakdown of the break up (roughly right about the time Buck says "I want you to move in with me"). (with pictures!)

Prior to the offer, we watch Tommy process through Evan's explanation about his relationship with Abby, things being transformative for him, etc. We have to bare in mind that this is where we also start to get what I've dubbed "starry-eyed Buck". He's so in the throes of what he's saying that I don't think he's really considering the connotation of his words. At the same time, Tommy doesn't know what lore Evan is about to drop him about this prior relationship. Remember that he now has to contend with the fact that they both have strong opinions on their relations toward Abby, and Tommy can't know if their feelings toward her as a person will be the same. I think Lou played this beautifully, appearing anxious and apprehensive as Tommy listened to Evan explain that Abby was transformative for him. Then he shifts into how Tommy has been transformative for him (which, he has, and we as the audience know this, but we understand it from a bigger POV than what Evan is saying with his words.)

There have been posts about Evan putting Tommy up on a pedestal throughout this speech (and really, possibly even sooner, but this is where we really get it expressed). Tommy tries to rectify this to a degree by countering "I wasn't always that way".

To that end, we then get Evan telling him "I know, and it just makes me admire you more." Tommy gives a bashful smile, clearly heartened by the statement, and even opening his mouth as though he's going to respond to it in some form. It would be interesting to know what was on Lou's mind of what (if anything) he thought would've been said there. Are there lines that were removed in this scene? Was 'I love you' actually going to come up? We can't really know. However, there's this part of me that thinks that Tommy thought that they were having a discussion on the depth of their relationship which would've possibly brought those 7 letters to the equation. Either way, this entire bit of facial acting is SO important, because it speaks volumes about how Tommy feels about how Evan feels about him.

From there we get the "I want you to move in with me, and this, THIS, THIS is such an important point for this ENTIRE scene. It's two seconds, but it holds SO much for the narrative. This man, who seems to be on the verge of ...something, clearly (who knows if I Love You was on his mind, or if it was just the fact that Evan was expressing how much he cares about him.) The reason this is all so important is THIS REACTION:

Now again, we don't know Tommy's trauma, but the joy literally drops out of his expression and shifts to panic. Now, speaking solely from the standpoint that these two haven't even said "I love you" yet, his boyfriend steamrolled over him from a possible declaration of love straight to moving in together without discussing semantics. Further, it's not even "I want to live together", it's "move in with me". We don't know much about Tommy's house (because these shitheads haven't built him a set yet), but we know that he has a HOUSE. With a GARAGE. Buck lives in a LOFT. Regardless of how much of an asshole this makes me sound like, it's crawling with red flags. It comes across as "fit more into my life" instead of "lets do this thing together". Further, if that's not bad enough, mention of getting engaged and married is thrown at Tommy as well, which holds two major bits of information: One, these are on Evan's mind. We've NEVER heard him talk about getting engaged or married to anyone. This speaks to the importance of their relationship to him, but the lack of I Love You also speaks on his own trauma. If we truly are getting the rom-com trope, at some point there's likely to be a conversation about why he lept over it (*cough* Taylor, his parents *cough cough*). Meanwhile, as he's continued in his starry-eyed speech, this is what Tommy is giving:

Now for those who don't know how to spot it, this my friends is a PANIC RESPONSE. The shift forward, the move to get up, the literal deep breath. He's having a panic attack. Now, obviously we don't know what brought this on, but god-willing, we WILL get the answers.

Now, to his own point, Tommy doesn't just straight up pop Evan's pink bubble. He does express that it's a sweet sentiment, but that it's a bad idea. To which point we get:

"Evan, that is so sweet. But I can't move in with you." "And why not?" Because. I know how this ends." "Uh, what-what's that supposed to mean?"

At which point, we clearly get the qualities about Evan that Tommy likes. "Incredible guy. Big-hearted. Hot as hell. Impulsive." I don't feel that the expression here matters as much as his tone of voice, because we can see on his face that he's expressing these qualities from a good place. The next point of reference isn't until Tommy's next line, when he says that Evan's reaction is out of things being "new and exciting".

To that end, the way Evan is talking to him makes this statement valid. He's not talking to Tommy like they've been together for six months and have built a relationship that should be moving in this direction. (For the tenth time I will repeat, he couldn't even dignify whether he was in love with Tommy when Josh asked).

Furthermore, I think when you consider this part of the scene, you also have to consider the strain in Tommy's voice. Something about those concepts (living together, getting engaged, married) is terrifying. It definitely gives the impression that Tommy has been faced with some version of this before and he got burned. Why is this important? Because of this:

"I'm saying no matter how bad I want it to be, I'm not your last." Those 9 words are important on their own, but when you couple them with the expression on Tommy's face and what we've just seen him go through, there's a clear point to the fact that he's been through this before. I also think that there can't be enough importance placed on the way he intonates "how bad". This is not a man saying no because he doesn't want to. He's backpedaling because he's sure that he's going to get burned. We get this point further driven home with this exchange:

"I'm your first." "But hey, they can be the same thing." "But, they usually aren't."

See this doesn't read to me as someone who's scared because he knows Evan has never been with another man. They're both fully grown adults who have had multiple relationships. What this speaks to me (now) as, is someone who has let someone convince him before that he would be their forever, that they were all in, and then broke him. When you include his childhood trauma and whatever abandonment issues it's left him with in correlation with all of this, yes, it's still an extremely biphobic set of lines. But in the context of what he's expressing and why, it's not about telling Evan he needs more experience, it's about telling him that he doesn't believe that he'll want to stay settled down with him six months, a year, etc., down the road. And THAT my friends, is abandonment issues 101. "Everyone else has left, so it doesn't matter that I'm in love with you, because you will leave too, and I need to protect myself from that."

Following that, we get this: "if I were to move in with you, you wouldn't mean to, you wouldn't plan for it, but you'd end up breaking my heart."

This line is SO important, right next to Evan's exchange with Josh about his relationship with Tommy. Why? Because even though neither of them have said it, it spells out that these two are in fact in love with each other, even if they haven't said it.

"I don't think I could deal with that." Tommy is fucking GONE on him. He's expressing that if he gave himself fully over to what Evan's referring to, losing him would break him. Again, we don't have the full picture on his trauma, but we know there's a mountain there. It's also worth noting again, that the intonation he uses in these statements clearly come across as someone trying to reign in their emotions and keep it together. That says to me that we're dangeously close to touching his trauma.

I don't feel like I have to include the final few bits of the scene in gifs because they're all over the site now, but the next line gives over the fact that he hasn't really been open about his trauma to Evan, given that his immediate response to expressing all of this is "I should go". This kind of reaction is generally brought on as not being accepted for having certain feelings. Now, obviously Evan is caught off guard by the entire interaction, the same way Tommy was (but for different reasons), so we have to take all of that into account when we think about the fact that instead of countering Tommy's logic, he asks instead if Tommy is breaking up with him.

Body language is also so important here for Tommy. His shoulders are hunched in, we see him wipe his face (meaning there are likely tears), and when he turns around, he's so caught up in whatever wave has taken him over that it takes Evan asking him for Tommy to state "yeah, I guess I did" about breaking up. Further, there's the fact that he states that he didn't see the break-up coming, which goes back to my point at the top of this post, that he clearly thought the conversation was going one direction, and instead it goes the other. From this point, we have Evan reeling, because he wants to create more of a life with Tommy, while Tommy is shutting down because of whatever is holding him back.

Finally, as I've referenced before, we get this line:

"Should've known that parking spot was too good to be true."

That line makes zero sense out of context, but in consideration of someone trying to lighten the weight they're carrying (which you can literally see by the way he has his hand on his neck, which you generally only see people do as a stress response). You can also double entendre this statement that getting to be with Evan was too good to be true. We get that little inhale with the smile, and I swear to God the only time I've seen that kind of reaction is right before someone cracks.

And then in closing, we get the "I'll see you 'round, Buck," our closing gut punch. Evan is still reeling, clearly. His face is very "what the hell just happened". Tommy is clearly not okay. This entire scene has opened an entire can of worms on them without a whole lot of answers.

Now, I've owned the fact that basically from the end of 806, I felt like this had to be a swerve, and that there has to be more to the story. I've also pretty much owned the fact that if the writers did actually just do this for kicks and don't have a resolution for it, I may not keep watching. However, in the context of the fact that, for the moment, I'm choosing to put hope in some kind of resolution, these lines make so much more sense. It is worth noting though, most people in the fandom, let alone the general audience, aren't going to psychologically break this shit down line-by-line. They're not going to lean into whatever trauma Tommy has that we don't know about yet. Its why the internet has been a mess since Thursday night. But it's also why I talk about how, when this situation gets resolved (because right now I refuse to say if), Buck has to give up the loft and give more of himself. Tommy, by the nature of the show, has fully immersed himself in Evan's life, but we haven't seen or heard mention of Evan doing so at all in Tommy's life. That doesn't mean he hasn't, but we haven't gotten any version of that. So when I say Evan needs to give things up... it's about matching what he's asking Tommy to give up. Because at the end of the day, when this circles back around, he's effectively going to be asking Tommy to trust that he won't break his heart like others have, and when you have a lifetime of abandonment issues and have learned to cope by being hyper-independent and alone, moving in the opposite direction is more terrifying than anything else. ESPECIALLY when you love that person, which we saw Tommy spell out. Evan has the ability to break him (and probably already is via this cut-off-at-the-quick break up.)

So, I'm really gonna need these shit heads to figure out that they'll be more miserable apart than they'd ever be together.

That's all. Thanks for coming to my TED talk.

[homopopsie]

[Sif has been looking at you weird for a while...] "Isa." [CRAB!!!] "Uhh, Yeah Sif?" [He's looking straight at you, his eyes piercing you to your bones. He looks kinda creepy like this... Reminds you of all the times you found him reading late at night with his flashlight eye.] "You mind if we talk for a second? Alone." "UMM. YEAH SURE SIF." [CRAB CRAB CRAB CRAB CRABBBBBB] "Are you alright, Isa? I've noticed you doing some... things. You're acting more- There's really no other way to say it, Isa you've been acting dumb. Acting like you're just 'really lucky' whenever you find a key that we need. I know you, Isa. I know you aren't stupid. You're really smart actually, and I know something is up. So what is it? Can I help?" [CRAB CRAB CRAB WHY IS HE ASKING THIS NOW????] "What do you mean? I really have just been getting lucky?! I don't know how I would know where the keys are, I've never been here?!?" [You feel awful lying to them.] "Right. So you finding the switch to the Death Corridor trap instantly isn't something strange? You always trust me to handle traps, and yet you immediately put your hand out in front of me and stopped me before I could look around, and then hit the hidden switch. I know I only have one eye, but that was really well hidden." "But how would I know where it was beforehand? I just had a feeling."

"I don't know Isa, but I know that people with 'a feeling' still jump at massive falling rocks! And I know that people with 'a feeling' don't just nonchalantly strut into The King's chambers and talk before Odile gets a chance to talk to the man who froze her entire home. I know people with 'a feeling' don't grit their teeth hard enough to shatter. Don't act like nobody noticed that either, maybe the others didn't but I did." [!!!] "But, that'd be impossible, right? It's impossible to have been here before-" "Is it? Because you sure seemed to have a few theories! You knew to ask me about Wish Craft, to ask me to read those books! You knew that I could wish properly, you didn't have an inch of doubt on your face when you said how I taught you. You knew that a wish could have given The King the ability to harness Time Craft. Don't think I believed you when you said you didn't wish for anything. I know you're indecisive, but you aren't going to just ignore something I told you either. I know you wouldn't just listen to me tell you how to wish and not bother with it. You aren't callous. [If only he knew... If only he knew how callous you were!]

"I..." "Isa, I know you're not stupid. And you know I'm not stupid either. If I see something, the only thing I can do is observe for more. And all signs right now point to you. Did something happen? Is that... Is that why you're looping in time? Did-"

"Oh Siffrin... Why? Why did you have to figure it out now? Why couldn't you have figured it out before? Why couldn't you have never figured it out?" "Isa, I-" "Can't you see? It's too late now. Nobody can help, now. It's already too late. Because I was too much of a coward to try and ask for help. Because I was too much of a coward to tell anyone about the loops! Because I was too much of a coward to say anything! Because I was too much of a coward to tell you how I feel! Especially you, Sif. I'm too much of a coward to tell you how I feel about you. And I'll never get that chance. Because it's already too late. "..." [He's just staring at you with a scared expression. Or at least its probably scared. Whatever. It's too late anyway. You coward.]

"...So what is it? Can I help?" "Nope! Was that all?"

[Sif seems... sad, at your response.]

"Alright. I'll miss you Isa. Come visit me sometime on your travels, okay? It'd be a shame if I couldn't look at the stars another time with you."

Roleswap Sus event combos Everybody gets a turn being the suspect and the suspectee! Nobody enjoys the experience, though.

[ariiadnes]

╭ ⿻ ･ TENDING TO THEIR INJURIES ( part iii. )

ଓ.° ・ cyno ･ alhaitham ･ tighnari. genshin impact. repost. ・ ・ ・ pt i. pt ii.

❀ ﾟ. ༄ cyno

the role cyno plays is a heavy one : judgement & justice hand in hand in an act of righteousness as he deems another to fate. how quick it is for one's wrongdoings to meld into something deeper, deserved, and decayed into a sin they will learn to shoulder for the rest of a lifetime. you hold back a sigh, brows furrowed only the slightest bit in suppressed concern as you discard sanguine drenched gauze. you almost forget the danger that lurks in the shadows, expression growing grim as the seconds pass. cyno notices, smiles ever so faintly as he calls your name in gentle tones and meets your gaze.

"i guess someone--" he pauses, dramatic, and perhaps the final straw in your relationship lies in the moment he pulls a genius invokation card from behind his ear, "decked me."

you stare at him, deadpan. he stares back, also deadpan. this is far too unsettling.

"oh yeah? got decked in your bleeding knee, huh?"

"oh. well, you see-- i actually scraped my knee--"

"falling for me?"

cyno pauses again, clears his throat so incredibly loudly you wonder if it hurt doing so. you roll your eyes, don't bother to even hide the way your lips curl in amusement as you pinch his cheeks. his words of protest die down when you kiss him on the nose and you almost think you will hear them again with the way he frowns once you pull away from him.

"i don't love you, dearest general."

"okay, well that actually hurts to hear."

you laugh, feel his arms wrap around your waist as he looks at you expectantly. you press a kiss to his temple, see the way his countenance lightens at your affection.

"kidding, kidding. i do. i'm glad you're okay."

❀ ﾟ. ༄ alhaitham

you almost wonder if alhaitham is human -- a silly thing to ponder, truthfully, but you do not think you've yet encountered someone who seeks logic in all things and seldom succumbs to feelings and instinct. & it's unfortunate, almost -- to feel anything remotely close to love for someone who does not know the heaviness of it.

there is a strange feeling that brews in your chest : a nervousness, a knowing anxiety, and so you clench your jaw in frustration, place your focus elsewhere as to seek haven in denial of such foolishness. you wrap the bandages around his hands, try to ignore the foreign and comforting tenderness that sends shivers down your spine every time your fingertips brush.

"you are worried."

his voice cuts through steel air, forces you to freeze in your movements. you swallow hard, look him in the eye. you wish you could understand. you wish you could read him, know what lies in a dormant heart. but you don't. you don't, and it doesn't mean anything, not really, but somehow, it hurts anyway and you think you hate that the most.

"i'm not." you tell him, ignore the way he raises a brow at the short response. "it's a few scratches on your hands, nothing major. i'm only doing this out of courtesy."

"that's not what i'm talking about." alhaitham studies you further, makes you feel too seen and understood without a single explanation. you think to resume wrapping the bandages once again, but he grabs your hands, prevents you from moving away. you still, hold your breath, feel the way his hold tightens if only by a slight amount as if testing the waters.

"enough tending to me." he leans forward, closes the distance that separates you. "tell me what's on your mind."

❀ ﾟ. ༄ tighnari

"so... did you know that plant was alive?"

you imagined this would happen one day, given the nature of the forest watcher. a peaceful day turned to chaos, a leisurely exploration turned to a rather stressful yet memorable lesson. tighnari winces as you rub the ointment into his skin, red and pink patches adorning his body. he throws you a strange look, almost finds himself distracted from the pain at your words.

"all plants are alive, technically."

you sigh.

"remember when you ate that mushroom and didn't sleep for three days?"

how was he supposed to know that plant was particularly carnivorous? there's a trial and error with these things-- a system of sorts. not that he has the most optimal methods of research and learning, but he gets things done at the very least, so who can complain?

( him, probably. he is truly suffering right now. who knew plants had such sharp teeth? )

"for research. someone has to learn these things." he stares at the ceiling, entirely absentminded, until a flicker of seriousness graces his expression. "this was also for research, too, by the way. in case you were wondering."

"i wasn't."

"you are now."

"i was wondering about something i already know the answer to?"

"yes. your quiz will be tomorrow morning, pass or fail. i expect only the best results."

you scoff in disbelief, but the grin on your face betrays your seemingly annoyed visage. a quiet fills the air as you continue to attend to the numerous rashes, touch gentle as not to irritate them further.

"thank you for your help." tighnari's voice is softer now; you would have completely overlooked it had it not been for the blush on his cheeks.

you nod, silent, offer a timid smile as you press your lips against his for only a moment.

"i lied. that was your quiz. you pass."

"stop ruining the moment, tighnari."

[gilbertscurls]

Hurt Again ➵ Matt Sturniolo

summary: matt gets hurt. again.

You rushed through the door, your heart pounding in your chest. Chris had called you, sounding panicked, but it was Matt’s name he’d dropped—Matt was hurt, again.

You found Matt in the kitchen, leaning against the counter, clutching his side with a blood-stained towel. His jaw was clenched, eyes narrowed in discomfort, and even though he tried to act tough, you could see the pain etched on his face.

“Matt!” You dropped your bag and rushed to his side, panic clear in your voice. “You’re hurt? Why are you always hurt?”

Matt, trying to keep his usual cool exterior intact, looked up with a half-smirk. “It’s not that bad.”

“Not that bad? You’re bleeding!” You grabbed the towel from him to check the wound, and sure enough, there was a nasty gash running along his ribcage. He winced but said nothing.

“What happened?” you demanded, voice tight with worry as you grabbed the first aid kit from the cabinet. “And don’t even try to tell me it was nothing.”

Matt sighed, leaning against the counter. “I was trying to fix the shelf in my room. It’s been loose for a while. Didn’t realize it was that loose, though. Came down with half my tools.”

You shook your head, your hands moving quickly to clean the wound. “You’ve got to be kidding me. You could’ve called for help, you know.”

“I didn’t think I’d need it,” he muttered, his tone defensive but softened by the pain.

You shot him a look, your eyes narrowing. “Of course you didn’t.”

The room fell into a tense silence as you worked, carefully cleaning the gash and applying pressure. Matt, as usual, was trying to act like it didn’t bother him, but you could see his jaw tighten every time you pressed down on the wound.

After a few moments, you sighed, your voice softer now. “Why is it always you, Matt? Why are you always hurt?”

Matt glanced down, his expression hard to read. He wasn’t great at opening up, even to you, but there was something in the way you asked that made him pause. “I don’t know. Maybe I’m just unlucky.”

You looked up at him, frustration and concern warring in your expression. “Or maybe you’re too stubborn for your own good. You don’t always have to do everything by yourself, you know?”

He huffed, trying to shrug it off. “I’m fine.”

“No, you’re not.” Your voice cracked slightly, the worry you’d been holding back leaking through. “You’re always hurt, Matt. Whether it’s stuff like this or keeping everything bottled up. You don’t let anyone help you.”

Matt met your gaze, and for once, his usual walls seemed to falter. “I’m not trying to be a hero. I just… I don’t want to be a burden.”

Your hands stilled for a moment as you processed his words. You’d known Matt long enough to understand that he wasn’t great at accepting help, but hearing him admit it—hearing the vulnerability in his voice—hit you harder than you expected.

“You’re not a burden,” you said softly, placing a bandage over the wound. “You never have been.”

Matt looked away, the tension in his shoulders easing slightly. “I don’t know how to… let people in. Not like you do.”

You smiled, despite the situation. “I know. But maybe you could try? You don’t always have to be the tough guy. It’s okay to let people care about you.”

For a moment, Matt didn’t say anything, just stood there as you finished patching him up. When you were done, you stepped back, your eyes searching his face for some sign that he was listening.

Finally, he sighed, his defenses lowering. “I’ll try.”

You smiled, the warmth in your eyes chasing away the tension that had been building. “Good. Because the next time you try to take on the world by yourself and end up hurt, I’m going to kill you.”

Matt chuckled, wincing slightly as he adjusted his stance. “Deal.”

You stood there for a moment, the usual distance between you replaced by a quiet understanding. Matt wasn’t one to show his emotions easily, and you had always known that, but now—now, you felt like maybe you were finally starting to bridge that gap.

“You don’t have to keep getting hurt to prove you’re strong, you know,” you said softly, reaching up to brush a strand of hair from his face.

Matt met your eyes, and for once, there was no smirk, no sarcastic comment. Just a quiet, genuine look that said more than his words ever could.

“I know,” he murmured. “And thanks… for always being there.”

You smiled, your heart swelling a little at his rare display of vulnerability. “Always.”

And maybe, just maybe, Matt would finally start letting you in.

tag list: @stuwniolo, @sturnobsessedwh0re, @matts-myloverboy, @imjusthereforthesturniolosmut, @lizzymacdonald06, @asherrisrandom, @sturniolowhore69, @faith5drpepper, @emely9274, @psychologyloverfr, @lovetaylorrussellgrr, @conspiracy-ash, @helpimateenagerinlove

[revelboo]

you producing first so quickly has me inspired to start writing again

That’s awesome! Writing is an escape for me. It can feel like work sometimes, but these are just for fun and I missed writing things that didn’t need to be perfect or meticulously planned out

My Favorite Accident Pt 3

TFP Knockout x Reader

• Slowly following at a distance, he can’t understand why you wouldn’t just let him permanently take care of the problem, namely that other human who’d dared lay hands on you. And because that man’s still alive, he’s had to tail you to make sure you get home safely. While he doubts the man will go anywhere near you after a run in with him, it still bothers him. That uncertainty that something might happen to you if he’s not there as he keeps remembering the fear in your eyes. Realizing that you’re not as tough as you act. No one gets to frighten you like that, except maybe him.

• Pulling into the apartment complex, you press your head back against the headrest. Your nerves finally catching up to you during the drive, leaving your hands faintly trembling at what might have happened. At what likely would have happened if not for Knockout. And maybe he’s right and you should have let him take care of Ricky, but siccing your big, alien racing buddy on that idiot didn’t exactly sit well with you. And there’s that baffling, snarling protectiveness of Knockout’s to figure out, too. He’d been furious, more than ready to stomp the guy just for touching you. Like having your own giant, psychotically violent bodyguard.

• This is where you live? Headlights dimmed, his engine snarls. While he doesn’t claim to know much about human dwellings, this building looks like it’s seen better days. Actually, it looks like burning it down would be doing you a favor. Especially when he sees the other residents lingering outside watching you. Absolutely not. Shifting on his tires, he watches you park and get out, lifting a hand in greeting to the group hanging out. But also reaching back to where you keep that pitiful little knife. That unconscious gesture rubbing him the wrong way and driving home that this place isn’t safe for you and you know it.

• A few more race wins and you’ll have enough for a down payment on a better apartment. Letting yourself inside, there’s time to shower and change, then you’re falling into bed. Too aware that your little extra rendezvous with Knockout have cut your sleep time to five hours, then it’s up for your day job. Every penny you can get going toward getting out of here. Because what would that be like? To not be scared all the time, shuddering as the guys hanging out in the front start yelling at each other and you pull a pillow over your head. Eventually someone calls the cops on them as another unit gets off third shift and cranks rock and roll to rattle your windows.

• He knows he’s been gone too long from the Nemesis, that he’s going to be missed, but hates leaving you here in this pit forsaken cesspool you apparently call home. It bothers him enough he stays the night, watching the drama unfolding right outside your door and getting angrier and angrier, because this is unacceptable. And he’s going to have to do something about it.

Previous

[tick-tack-bastard]

[The two men look nervous. One of them holds a metal suitcase and is about to hand it over to the woman who's wearing a gun very visibly on her belt.

But before she can take it, the transaction is interrupted by a new person entering the stage.]

I see you already started without me?

[The deep, threatening voice with a cockney accent comes from somewhere behind the two men who look even more terrified when they hear it.]

Good evening, gentlemen.

[The voice continues in an almost mocking tone, and when its owner steps out of the shadows in between the men to put his arms around their shoulders and pull them a little closer - the intimacy clearly just making them more uncomfortable - it suddenly makes a lot of sense that they're so on edge. The man's face is one that John only knows from old photographs. It's that of the Deadliest Man Alive.

His face looks just as unrecognisable as his voice sounds, with the only familiar part of it being the look in his eyes. A blood lust that by now John has seen plenty of times on Owen, only that now, it doesn't seem like it's ever gonna leave his face.

Looking closely, one would notice that the Deadliest Man's proportions are just as long and lanky as Owen's, but he manages to look like he has a bulkier build just based on body language and the way he moves. Even knowing his true identity, the Deadliest Man looks nothing like Owen.]

You weren't here, I was, so I was gonna take the bomb.

[The woman still acts very carelessly, which makes Owen let go of the two men - one of them just exhales in in relief, the other one closes his eyes to whisper a short prayer - and walk towards her.]

Would you like to express your criticism towatds me?

[The woman doesn't pick up on the trap and just goes on.]

Well, if you're already asking, you could work on your timing. It doesn't look very professional to be late go an important meeting like this.

Oh, does it bother you that I am late? I am so sorry. I'll try to find a way that you won't be bothered by me in the future.

[She still doesn't pick up on the sarcasm, looking quite happy with herself. That is, until she suddenly has one of the Deadliest Man's machetes between her rips and collapses, dying.]

That should do it.

[The Deadliest Man wipes the blood off his blade on his dead henchman's clothes and then looks back at the gang members.]

Unless you also find me unprofessional that is.

[They both quickly shake their heads.]

N-no of course not!

"We wouldn't even dare to think so!"

[The lid comes off easily and reveals a yellow cube, barely smally than the box, inside it. Its surface is slightly transparent and reveals an orange maze-like structure underneath it. The moment it becomes visible, the factory building around John is replaced by endless Black, and mad laughter seems to be coming from everywhere.]

[Rather than immediately panicking, John sighs in annoyance. He looks around for any sign of life, calling out to see who will answer.]

Wiley? If this is your doing, it’s not terribly impressive.

[jifloulette]

heeeelllo! sorry to bother you if you're busy, but would you like to do something with Reo? LITERALLY ANYTHING IS GOOD, but please fluff. thanks for your attention and have a nice day 💗

Taro Milktea?! || m. reo x gn!reader

genre ➳ - - - fluff fluff fluff !! (little angst <3)

synopsis ➳ - - - You've liked the Reo Mikage for such a long time now, but you never really thought of confessing. Why? It's only because you were scared of all the endless scenarios that would happen if you did, so you just continued to be his best friend. A new milk tea shop just opened around the two of yours school so you invited him and Nagi to try it out! You thought it was the perfect way to end the day after all, but little did you know that this would've been the day that you just happened to accidentally confess your feelings.

word count ➳ - - - 1.3k

warnings ➳ - - - a few swear words here and there, maybe a bit ooc (?), nagi mentioned but only has a platonic relationship with Reo and y/n.

author's note ➳ - - - thank you so much for requestingg!!! literally motivated me to make one more fic before the weekend ends, i hope you enjoyed what i cooked up !!!!!!! i actually loved this so i hope you love it a lot as well  🥺💗

"Hey Reo, Nagi! I heard there's a new milk tea shop that just opened around the corner of our school! Wanna go there after you guys practice?" you shouted towards the other side of the classroom that startled the purple-haired a bit. "Yeah sure, y/n! All of our drinks are on us, yeah?" Reo answered with a smile on his face. God, you were so in love with the man in front of you, yet you still couldn't manage to tell him your true feelings, one day i will, you thought.

Following the two boys to the soccer field, you placed your bag on the bleachers and waited for them to start practicing. You didn't mind watching them, no, you didn't mind watching Reo at all. The way he played was just so mesmerizing, the way his feet dribble around the ball, and the way he shoots the ball with so much force just made you fall for him even more. Time passed by fairly quickly, you didn't how. Maybe you were just so focused on Reo that you didn't notice, or maybe the world just seemed to spin faster whenever your eyes were on him.

After Nagi and Reo practiced, the purple-haired boy decided to take a quick shower which left you and Nagi to chat for a bit before he was the one to take a shower. "Hey, you're bound to confess to Reo soon." Nagi stated, you were taken aback to be honest, you didn't know that Nagi knew that you liked Reo. "Huh? What do you mean? Reo's just a friend, Nagi..", you answered, acting dumbfounded. "I see the way you look at him whenever he plays, no, the way you look at him every time he's with you or with us. It's obvious, y/n. You should just tell him." Nagi real talked you, he was right after all. You were stupid for not telling one of your best friends the truth, but you were scared! You didn't want things to get awkward between the two of you! You knew you didn't have a chance, girls and boys come flocking to him asking him to be their dates, whether it be to a dance or Valentine's day. If Nagi thought that it was obvious that you liked Reo, shouldn't he know that by now too? He is the smartest guy in the class, then again, he wasn't the most emotionally intelligent. "Listen, I..i just don't want things to be different between us, I'm okay just being Reo's best friend, m'kay? Just let me be..", you told Nagi, with a fake smile. "'Kay, whatever you say, y/n" Nagi said, his tone sounding concerned.

"Ooookay, Nagi, it's your turn! Hurry up 'kay, I really want that milktea y/n was talking about." Reo shouted, you waved to him and asked him to sit beside you as you played with his wet hair. "H-hey! You don't need to play with my hair that rough..!" Reo remarked, you just chuckled upon hearing it. "Hey, you at least need to dry your hair before we go to milk tea shop!" you replied, laughing when you saw the face he made.

Finally, Nagi was done and the three of you went to the shop, interlocking arms with the purple-haired boy beside you. Reo's face had a light pink tint on it, you noticed it but you brushed it off thinking that he just probably felt hot because of the sun but the truth was, Reo genuinely liked you too. Like you, he was also scared of things being awkward if he were to confess. Whenever so many people came flocking to him with handwritten letters, store-bought or handmade chocolates, his eyes were still on you, wondering if you liked him the same way he liked you. He's already forgotten count of how many times he's screamed into his pillow, kicking his feet, and acting like a teenage girl daydreaming about her crush. He's tried to write letters, but it's no use, he just ends up ripping the piece of paper and throwing it around his room.

"Woah.. this place looks so pretty! I'm so glad you guys agreed to come with me!", you stated, Reo swore he could see sparkles in your eyes, he swore he saw hearts around his head when he saw you! "I'll order first, it's on you right, Reo?" Nagi asked to which the purple-haired nodded. "Uhh, I'll just order a medium sized lemon tea, no pearls please, thank you.", Nagi told the elderly woman working there, "I'll get a medium sized chocolate mik tea please, with extra pearls!" Reo exclaimed, a smile plastered on his face. "Hey, y/n! What're you gonna order?" Reo asked you and to be honest, you really didn't know what you were gonna order! The two boys in front of you ordered so quickly as if they were regulars! There were so many good flavors and toppings to choose from, you also had the tendency to be indecisive so how were you gonna pick in the span of a minute? "Hello? Earth to y/n..?" Reo added, "Uh..uhm! I'll just get the taro milktea. With uh, extra pearls as well and medium sized w-will be fine..!" you manage to speak out, "Why'd you get that? You tend to get sweeter flavors, right?" Reo questioned you, "Well uh..I kind of get pressured because the two of you ordered so quickly and I kind just said the first thing that came to my head which was Taro because it kind of reminded me of you..!" you said, really, really fast.

You spoke so fast that Reo couldn't under stand any of it. There was only one thing Reo noticed though, you ordering Taro milktea because it reminded you of him?! "Why'd you think it reminded you of me?" Reo asked, the tip of his ears turning red, "I guess since it was purple and your hair's purple which I really really like playing with and- oh my god, did i just fucking say that out loud?" you responded, pretty embarrassed, your cheeks turning into the same shade of light pink when you interlocked hands with Reo. "Y-you like playing with my hair..?" Reo asked, "Y-yes.. I'm sorry if that weirded you out, I just like you so much and your hair is so soft and smells so nice that I- oh my god, did I just do it again?!?!" you remarked, shouting towards the end. "Wait?! You like me, y/n? Do you really? Please tell me I'm not dreaming!!" Reo exclaimed, you were confused as hell. Did he like you too? If he did so, then how have you just noticed it now? Oh my god, if you really just had noticed it back then, maybe you would've been dating him by now!

Throughout the whole conversation slash confession, you realized that Reo's actions towards you and other people was different. The way he looked at you with so much love and care, the way he helped you with homework in your most hated subject, the way he would always talk to you with so much care and affection, all of that wasn't a coincidence, right? "I guess there's no point in hiding, huh? Well yeah, I do like you Reo, a lot." you said, the purple-haired boy responded by hugging you tightly, catching you off guard. "Oh my god, I can't believe this day finally happened!! I like you so fucking much too, y/n! You don't how long I've been crushing on ya!" the boy hugging you announced. He was so cute like that, he was so cute being so affectionate and lovey-dovey towards you.

"One medium sized lemon tea with no pearls, one medium sized chocolate milk tea with extra pearls, and one medium sized taro milk tea with extra pearls!" the elderly woman said. "Hey lovebirds, could the two of you get a room and get your drinks already, hurts m'eyes seeing the two of ya." Nagi said, it was only then did you pulled away from the hug, still holding Reo's hand on the way to get the two of yours drinks.

Nagi had already parted ways with the two of you when Reo asked you something, "Hey y/n.. since you're like my lover now uhmm.. do you wanna stay over for the night at my place?" you immediately squealed in happiness and agreed. It was safe to say that the milk tea shop became a frequent spot that you would have dates with Reo, still ordering the Taro Milktea.

©🇯​​🇮​​🇫​​🇱​​🇴​​🇺​​🇱​​🇪​​🇹​​🇹​​🇪​, do not steal, translate, or repost any of my writings anywhere else.

[notmorbid]

these violent delights.

dialogue prompts from these violent delights by micah nemerever.

i never told you my name.

who puts those awful ideas in your head?

you're forever assuming the worst.

what's that face? you look like you're going to cry.

you're one of those people who worry all the time, aren't you?

i don't worry, i ruminate. they're distinct actions.

nothing made you. you just are.

beautiful things are supposed to hurt.

people tell you you're shy all the time, don't they?

i don't know how i ever got on without you.

a little trouble is a good thing for a young person.

i wasn't born yesterday. i know what kids get up to.

it's good to have guns to stick to.

you could do anything to me and i'd let you.

i'm not ready to be seen. not yet.

i don't need you to treat me respectfully. i'm not made of glass.

tell me you love me, at least. please. i need to know somebody does.

do i look normal? i can't tell if i look normal.

you can get away with anything, as long as you act like an authority on the truth.

don't tell me what i want.

you know you're just about the worst liar i've ever met.

i don't think you've ever felt anything that didn't hurt you.

you're so square, you're a cube.

i just want you to believe me when i tell you you're worth something.

there are limits to what you can expect people to understand, without living it.

you can't fight everybody all the time. you still have to live with them.

i forget how blue the sky can be outside the city.

i'm going to push you off a cliff, you fucking boy scout.

thank you for trusting me with this.

be a kid while you still can.

please believe in the things i try to tell you, instead of the things you think you deserve to be told.

if the sun touched you for even a moment, you'd go up in flames. like a vampire.

your voice changes when you're angry.

what a lonely, dreary thing it is to know the truth.

you never look away, even when your eyes are closed, but i'm never certain you can see what's really there.

tell me you need me. in those words.

can i tell you something? that i'm all but certain you won't believe?

i never lie to you. but sometimes, i wish i could.

you never let me pretend the truth is alright when it isn't.

you have a profound, elusive sadness about you.

you didn't. please tell me you didn't.

you and your awful little games.

why would i bother to grow my own conscience when you're always around to pester me?

you're going to help me escape.

this house is a shadowbox, never meant for human things.

you have no right to stop me, and you're not going to try.

you're sweet, when you want to be.

do you want me to kill ____? i mean it.

it might do you good to be an orphan.

you're just so sincerely creepy.

wealthy people pay handsomely for the privilege of ignoring cries for help.

i've never seen you like that before. not once.

i've decided to learn to be impulsive.

the worst damage humans do isn't rooted in malice, but in thoughtlessness.

there's such a thing as right and wrong. anyone can figure out the difference if they're willing to think for themselves.

there's no part of you i can't see.

i don't want to hurt you. please don't let me.

you're ridiculous, sometimes. but that's alright.

i don't want you right now. go home.

i'm not like you. i don't even have a shape of my own to hold anything else in place.

i'll never matter the way you do, and you know it.

say what you need to say.

if you say the word 'deserve' one more time, i'm driving us off a bridge.

i've been meaning to talk to you about ____.

i'm worried about what you're getting into.

you don't see me. you can't. you never could.

it's your life. you're entitled to make your own mistakes.

i want you to know you deserve better. you don't have to put up with ____.

you scare the hell out of me. you really do.

you look the same way you always have.

i was worried i'd lost you.

i'll take care of you. i don't need you to be brave.

all i want to do is make you happy, and you're the unhappiest person i've ever met.

i would rather be cruel than weak.

i want you to let me be nice to you today. i don't care if you think you deserve it.

this place looks like somewhere in a jigsaw puzzle.

it's always been real for me. every second.

please don't say anything to my mother.

we can't fix it if you don't tell me what happened.

i'll call you when i can stand the sight of you. don't hold your breath.

hiding the truth is still lying.

i thought you'd finally trust me if you knew i'd kill for you.

i'm just as much of a monster as you are.

i was missing part of myself my whole life, until i met you.

righteous fury leaves no space for fear.

you can always talk to me. about anything, okay? i love you no matter what.

you played [game] in school, didn't you?

no one tolerates boredom worse than the idle rich.

someone needs to be looking after you.

you know you can't actually stop me, right?

i want to be able to look at you.

when you need to, you will understand.

i'm only ever early when i'm afraid.

people talk themselves into the strangest things when they want to look impressive.

in the end, there's no difference between trusting someone and underestimating them.

[aran-morinorea]

Tar-Telepta, Aran Morinórea: I want to hear about Annatar's Shit Paradigms, of course :D

...All right so here's the thing you don't get Annatar's Shit Paradigms because it needed so much groundwork before I can begin to write actual prose. But you do get this whole thing describing Annatar's interiority in the months after The Inciting Event for the whole au. Because I needed to pin it down so I can even start Annatar's Shit Paradigms.

--

Celebrimbor confronts Annatar - Tar-Mairon - about his activities in Mordor, gives him the “Your evil plans or me” ultimatum, and then Mairon fucks off to go have a tantrum.

This tantrum involves: 

Going back to Barad-dur and killing some people who definitely 100% deserved it for sure. 

That thing where someone goes to a bathroom and splashes water on their face and looks in the mirror while leaning on the sink except it’s lava instead of water. 

Laying facedown in the fires of Mount Doom and rethinking his life. 

Causing multiple earthquakes. 

...Thinking about the joy of watching Celebrimbor learn and make things. 

Thinking about the satisfaction of working in partnership with someone else, someone as vibrant and strong and smart and wonderful as Celebrimbor. 

Thinking about going and taking Celebrimbor by force, laying siege to Ost-in-Edhil and putting him in chains and bringing him here and keeping him.

… Thinking about how strong and vibrant and stubborn and principled Celebrimbor is. 

Thinking about whether Celebrimbor would be one of those people who would rather die than live as a thrall. 

Realizing that yes, Celebrimbor absolutely would die for what he believes in, and it would be so much work to try keep his spirit around, and it wouldn’t be nearly the same as having him - really having him - having him to work and argue and play with - having his love.

Remembering that Celebrimbor still doesn’t know about the Sauron thing, and he might be able to keep it that way.

Remembering that Celebrimbor did not cast him out of his life unequivocally - he will not be the friend or lover of a slaver and an imperialist, but if Mairon takes steps to stop being those things -

Thinking about how hard it would be, really, to stop being those things.

Realizing he’s genuinely considering just giving up on the vision of Melkor.

Spontaneously filling the whole room with flames.

That was the throne room. He’d been sitting there, motionless and completely unresponsive, for four days.

There might have been people in there who will be annoying to replace. Mairon simply cannot care about it right now.

Remaining on fire while thinking about Melkor’s promises.

He said it was only a matter of time.

He said it would be better to put the rightful king on the throne of Arda quickly, and get back to the business of metals and fractals, than to fight a long defeat and be judged unworthy at the end, never having time for beauty again.

And then He lost.

Three times out of four.

As soon as the Valar bothered to interfere.

And maybe, at the end, after the final battle, it would be better, safer, to have been working toward His purposes the whole time He was gone, but -

Thinking about what would happen if the Valar bothered to interfere with his current projects.

…Thinking about how hard it would be, really, to be - in truth, even, maybe! - someone Celebrimbor could love.

How hard would it be to act within the boundaries of Celebrimbor’s principles?

He did not say “Believe what I believe.”

He did not say “Cease to be a monster.”

He said “Your policies are monstrous and I cannot support them,” which suggests that it is the action that matters most to him. That the problem is what he is doing, and not what he is.

Changing that does not seem so hard.

Perhaps it will be a fun challenge, like an arbitrary restriction for a jewelcraft competition.

And really - if anyone is going to change him - if he’s going to accept anyone’s judgement - if there’s anyone currently in Arda who Mairon thinks is right - would it not be Celebrimbor?

Of course it would.

Deciding that, you know what, Mairon would be willing to commit to Celebrimbor’s vision - if Celebrimbor will fucking commit to him.

This is so Mairon can keep him.

So that they will twine their souls together and be - be that partnership which is so full of joy.

Deciding that if Celebrimbor won’t do it - if he wants “Annatar” to give him this without giving anything in return - then - yes.

Then he will find another way to keep him. 

And it would not be as good, it would not be Mairon’s shining vision, but it would be something. And eventually Celebrimbor would see the value in Mairon’s methods. He’s sure of it.

When he’s finally done with his tantrum, Annatar climbs out of the magma-filled crevasse he'd been sulking in and goes up to draft the words to a wedding proposal.

[cookiesandbiscuits]

Just... Friends?

Pairing: Leviathan x GN! Reader

Summary: You have always liked him. Maybe more than what most people would consider as friendship. And you have a feeling that he also feels the same way. Yet it's frustrating whenever he refers to you as just a friend even though his actions say otherwise.

Genre: Fluff. Maybe crack too if you squint at it hard enough.

A/N: This was sitting on my drafts for AGES!!

But after several editing and removing some stuff, I finally got this story to go in a direction that I like!

Although there is a specific scene here that made me feel hypocritical lmaooo.

Happy reading! ❤️

Warning:

- Not proofread.

- Cussing.

- Levi is as dense as a brick.

- The reader is frustrated and decides to take matters into their own hands.

- The reader is referred to as MC.

- Probably OOC. This is just unplanned fluff writing. Asmo is acting as your wingman.

MASTERLIST

Inspired by "Just A Friend To You" by Meghan Trainor and Adrien Agreste from Miraculous Ladybug (lol)

You were done.

With a tired sigh, you leaned back on the sofa and closed your eyes. You thought back on what happened earlier in Levi's room.

"Woooo!! Finally!!"

The room was filled with joyous shouts when the TV screen displayed the word "victory" in large letters.

"MC, we finally beat the boss!"

Soon, you were enveloped by a familiar warmth as Levi tightly wrapped his arms around you. You felt your cheeks heat up a little when you noticed that his embrace was a little longer than usual.

"Haha, yes, we did. Congratulations to both of us."

Levi gently pushed you away within arm's length and looked at you with a grin. "I couldn't have done it without you."

"Eh? But I haven't done as much as you, though."

Levi shook his head in response. "That's not true! If you hadn't done that move, we'd still be playing this round again! Seriously, you're the best friend a gamer could ask for!"

You felt your eye twitch a little at his word. Friend.

You have always liked him. Maybe more than what most people would consider as friendship. And you have a feeling that he also feels the same way. Yet it's frustrating whenever he refers to you as just a friend even though his actions say otherwise.

You tried to show it through your actions that you like him countless times before, but for some reason, it always goes over his head.

The two of you continued to play some more before deciding enough was enough.

You dragged both of your hands on your face and sighed once more.

"You okay, hon?"

Your eyes flutter open at the sound of Asmodeus's voice. He looks at you, slight worry evident in his expression.

You gave him a small smile.

"Yeah, my eyes are just a little tired, that's all."

"You should really cut off some of your gaming time. Then you won't be complaining about how dry your eyes are anymore," Asmo chides you as he hands out an eyedrop for your eyes. But he knows you wouldn't listen to him no matter how many times he scolds you.

"Mmm, thanks."

......

As you put the eye solution on your eyes, you felt Asmo's focused stare on you.

"What is it?"

You sat up when you finished putting the eye solution. The fifth-born faces you with a knowing look as he sat on the sofa beside you.

"Spill it."

You look at him confused.

"Spill what?"

"It's a romance-related trouble, isn't it?"

Your eyes widened slightly. Was it that obvious? You felt your cheeks warm at the realization.

"I- um..."

You nodded, too embarrassed to form a coherent sentence at the moment.

"Wanna talk about it in my room instead?"

Well... it wouldn't hurt to talk about it to Asmo, you thought.

"Okay..."

Soon after you agreed, Asmo dragged you away and into his room.

.

.

.

"I'm back."

You looked at Asmo carrying a tray of cookies and tea. He went to the kitchen after letting you in his room.

"So, what's been bothering you, hm?" The Avatar of Lust asked, interest glimmering in his eyes.

"Oh, you know... the same old stuff," you grumbled as you flopped forward over the demon's lush bedsheet.

"Ah," was his reply once he realized what you were talking about.

"...You know you won't be suffering like that if you'd just say it straight to his face, right?"

"No."

Yeah, right. Easier said than done.

"Why not? You won't lose anything if you do."

"Yes, I do. I'd lose my dignity."

"Mhm. Right... And how did this way of "preserving" your dignity go for you?"

Asmo raised his perfectly shaped eyebrow on your unmoving form, completely unconvinced.

You can only groan in response.

"Come on, you know how my brother is. If you want him to know that you're in love with him, you have to say it to him directly. Otherwise, he'll think you're just being a really nice person, like what's happening right now." The fifth-born rolled his eyes, not at you but at his dense as a brick older brother.

...........

...........

"...But what if he really just think of me as a friend? What then? I don't wanna risk what we currently have over these... feelings," you mumble under your breath.

"Well, you wouldn't know that unless you do something, hon."

"And what if he rejects me?"

You finally moved after a while, turning your head to look at the beautiful demon who sat beside you.

"Then accept his feelings and move on. It'll be difficult, but atleast it's better than pining and stuck forever to where you are right now, not knowing how to move forward," he answered in a gentle tone and caressed your hair in a way that was akin to a mother comforting her crying child.

The gesture lulled you to sleep.

And as you slowly drifted off to dream world, a small part of you thought that yeah... you probably should confront your conundrum instead of running away from it.

Maybe... you should ask... Asmo for... help.

.

.

.

And that's how you found yourself sitting in a karaoke booth with Leviathan beside you.

"Oh wow! It's been AGES since the last time we hung out here!" The purple-haired demon grinned as he eagerly flipped through the song book.

"Ahaha... I know, right? Since exams are finally done, I thought this would be a great way to unwind after all that stress," you replied, careful not to let the bubbling anxiety inside you show.

"Oh, definitely! By the way, where are the others?"

As Levi asked that, you heard a ping from your phone. There was a message from Asmo.

[Asmo: "We're almost there but we'll give you some time together. Good luck, hon! 😘"]

You discreetly gulped at the message before putting your phone back to your pocket.

Thanks, Asmo!

"Asmo said they're going to be a bit late and we can just go ahead and order for ourselves or sing."

"Huh... alright," Levi said before going back to flipping through the song book.

"...."

"...."

"...Hey, Levi?"

"Hm?"

"Do you mind if I pick a song first?"

The demon looked at you quizzically. "Sure... Why though? You don't usually sing first."

"Well, um- you know... Just a change of pace," you shrugged.

You can feel sweat form on your hands.

After a moment, he handed the song book to you. Immediately, you felt the anxiety inside you intensify as you searched through the song book until you finally found what you were looking for.

You pressed buttons to enter the song number. The title flashed on the screen as you hit OK.

[Just A Friend To You by Meghan Trainor]

"Ooh, is this a song from the human world?" Levi asked.

"Yep," you answered.

Picking up the microphone, you took a deep breath to calm your erratic heartbeats.

Okay, this now or never.

"Why you gotta hug me like that every time you see me? Why you always making me laugh Swear you're catching feelings"

You looked at Levi, who, after you gave the song book back, returned to searching for songs to sing.

You turned your vision back to the karaoke screen.

"I loved you from the start, So it breaks my heart When you say I'm just a friend to you 'Cause friends don't do the things we do. Everybody knows you love me too. Tryna be careful with the words I use. I say it cause I'm dying to. I'm so much more than just a friend to you."

You looked back at him again, discreetly this time.

He was still busy with the song book.

Slowly, your anxiety was replaced by irritation.

Is he really THIS dense?? Or is he just acting like he knows nothing?

In your frustration, you stood up from where you were sitting.

"When there's other people around You never wanna kiss me. You tell me it's too late to hang out And you say you miss me."

You thought back to the times where he acted like he, too, liked you back.

Were those sweet gestures of his just a ploy to toy with you? Or was it just you who gave those actions a different meaning than what he actually intended?

You don't know anymore.

"And I loved you from the start, So it breaks my heart When you say I'm just a friend to you 'Cause friends don't do the things we do. Everybody knows you love me too."

You turned to face him, and to your surprise, his attention was now all on you.

As hard as it was, you managed to force yourself to keep looking at his citrine eyes.

"You say I'm just a friend to you Friends don't do the things we do. Everybody knows that I love you. I'll try to be careful with the words I use And I'll say it cause I'm dying to. You're so much more than just a friend to me."

Thick silence quickly replaced the fading last notes of the song.

Levi was the one who broke the staring contest between the two of you.

"Um... That- that was... a really good song. Though I think you sang the last verse wrong there."

You continued to stare at him.

"Levi."

He flinched when you said his name.

"I know this is weird and very sudden. But I seriously can't keep this to myself anymore. You are one, if not the most passionate and fun person I have ever met, and I always enjoy the time we spend together. In fact, I always look forward to the days we hang out. And, well..."

You swallowed the lump in your throat.

"What I want to say is that... I like you, Levi."

"You- you like... me?" The subject of your confession looked back at you incredulously.

You nodded.

"As- as a friend... right?" he asked, fidgeting.

What?

Now it was your turn to look at him wide-eyed. No way he's being serious.

"Huh? No. I mean I like you. Like like you. Romantically," you deadpanned.

"N-no way. You can't be serious."

"I'm totally serious."

Your nervousness slowly turned into annoyance.

"Levi-"

Before you could finish your sentence, Levi suddenly stood up, grabbed his stuff, and bolted out of the booth.

You could only blink at how fast it happened.

It was also at that moment that the rest of the brothers arrived.

"What's with him?" asked Mammon as he glanced at the direction his brother ran.

"I don't know. Maybe there's a limited time event on one of his games?" Beel replied.

However, one look at your expression and Asmo knew exactly what happened.

"Sorry guys, I'm suddenly feeling a little under the weather right now," the fifth-born says.

He grabbed your wrist and smiled. "With that said, I'm gonna go home. And I'm taking MC with me!"

"What?! You can't do that!" Mammon exclaimed in protest, as expected.

As much as you like to hang out with the other demon brothers, you're not in the mood to do so anymore after what happened.

So you forced yourself to smile.

"Sorry guys, maybe next time. Enjoy the karaoke for us!"

.

.

.

"Wanna tell me what happened, hon?"

After arriving at the House of Lamentation, you and Asmo made a beeline straight to his room. Though as you passed Levi's room, you felt a pang of pain in your chest.

And now, here you are, getting pampered by the Avatar of Lust himself.

"Well, you know... I confessed, and he rejected me," you smiled bitterly.

"...."

"...Oh, come on. Don't give me that look," you say when you noticed the worry in Asmo's eyes. "Atleast now, I won't be stuck pining for him forever, right?"

"Yeah, but that doesn't mean it won't hurt. And can't I worry about our adorable little lamb?"

You gave him a small smile. "Thanks a lot, Asmo. I mean it. And don't worry too much, I'll be fine."

You felt arms wrap around you as the demon hugged you.

"It's just- I already expected it to hurt if he rejected me outright. But seeing him run away like that, it's like he doesn't even want to hear it."

"Wait..."

All of a sudden, Asmo pulled back from the embrace and looked at you.

"So you mean to tell me he didn't gave you a proper reply?" he asks.

"Um... yeah," you respond.

"......"

At that moment, only one thought came to Asmodeus's mind.

For the love of everything beautiful, these two really are stupid when it comes to each other.

.

.

.

KNOCK KNOCK

"Levi, are you there? It's me, Asmo. Can we talk for a sec?"

It took a few more knocks before the third-born opened his door.

"Asmo? What is it? Hey-!" The demon protested as his brother made his way into his room.

"Don't worry, this won't take too long," said Asmo.

Seeing that his younger brother won't budge until he spoke with him, Levi sighed in defeat and closed the door.

"So, what is it that you want to speak with me so bad that you'd barge into my room with no permission?" he asked as he sat on his gaming chair, raising his eyebrow on the Avatar of Lust who was making himself comfortable with one of the beanbags in his room.

Asmo smiled before replying, "You like them, don't you?"

That made him flinch.

"Wha? Wh-why would you think that I like MC??"

That only made the fifth-born's smile grow into a grin.

"I never said their name, yet you immediately thought of them. So I was right, you do like them."

Levi felt his face warm up as he realized his slip-up.

"Do the others know?"

Asmo shrugged.

He could only hide his blushing face on his hands. Oh, how he wanted to curl up in a ball and let the earth swallow him whole right now.

"But if you like them, why didn't you tell them that when they confessed?"

Quickly, he turned to look back to his brother.

"How did you know that?! And what's it to you, anyway?"

"Levi," Asmo spoke with a serious voice, "you're my brother, and I want you to be happy. And if being with them will bring you that happiness, then why not go for it? Especially now that you know they like you back."

"But what if- what if they find out what kind of person I really am and hate me for it?"

"Honestly, I don't really know. And that's why..."

Levi's gaze followed Asmo as he walked up to the door and opened it.

It revealed the person he was avoiding for a few days now: you.

"Wh-why are they here?!" he panicked.

"To talk things out, duh! You two really need it," he heard him say as the fifth-born pushed you inside the room before closing the door once more.

Awkward silence filled the air between you.

"Hey," you said.

"H-hey."

It was the only thing he could mutter right now.

"Sorry, Asmo asked me to come here." You scratched your neck; Levi recalled it was one of your nervous tics. "I could leave, if you want."

"No! ...I-I mean, no, y-you can stay."

He gestured to the beanbag Asmo was sitting on earlier.

"Thanks..."

Once again, silence filled the air between you.

"...Um"

"I-"

Both of you spoke at the same time.

"Oh, sorry. Go ahead," he apologized.

"No, it's okay," you replied.

"...."

"...."

"Um, MC..."

"Yes?"

"...I'm sorry, for acting the way I did that day."

He looked down to his hands as he fidgeted with them.

"It's... alright. I should be the one apologizing for springing it onto you suddenly."

"...."

"...."

"To tell you the truth, I was really happy when you told me you like me."

"Mm..."

"And then I got scared."

"Scared of what?"

"Of doing you wrong. And you hating me for it. You deserve so much more than what I could offer you, and I'm scared that one day, you'd realize that and leave me."

"...Levi."

He looked up from his hands and his eyes met yours.

"Does all of that really matter when you're the one I want?"

His eyes widened.

"Say that you're right, and I do deserve more. But I want you, Levi, and that's all that there is to it."

If Levi never thought you beautiful before, he would now as he continued to stare into your eyes, clear and devoid of hesitation.

And before he knew it, he walked up to where you are and kissed you.

It was everything he thought it would be and more. Your lips were soft and sweet.

It was as if he was brought back to heaven for a moment until the two of you broke contact for air.

He pressed his forehead to yours.

"Do you really mean it? Even if I'd annoy you to hell? Even if I won't be as sweet as the leading men in those shoujo animes you like? And–"

"Yes, I do. I mean it," you giggled as you cupped his cheeks with your hands.

And for the first time after a few days, Levi shyly smiled.

"So, does this mean we're a couple now?" you asked.

"Yeah. I guess we are."

.

.

.

Lifting his ear from the door, Asmo made a thumbs up gesture to his brothers who were with him.

It was a success.

Mammon was the first to react. "FINA–"

He was shushed by the others.

"Oops, sorry."

"Good for them. They finally got together after all this time pining for each other," Satan says.

"Yeah, it was getting kinda annoying seeing them give each other longing gazes," Belphegor remarked.

The others nodded in agreement.

"Atleast they're happy now."

It was Beelzebub who spoke this time with a hushed voice.

"Wait, does this mean we'll be seeing them be lovey-dovey with each other now?"

"...."

"...."

"...."

"...."

"...."

"...."

"...I hope not. That would be way more annoying than seeing them pine for each other obliviously."

Once again, the brothers nodded in agreement.

"All right, now that they're together now, let's all celebrate!" Mammon cheered in a hushed voice.

But before he could knock on the third-born's door, a gloved hand grabbed him by the shoulder.

"Stop that and leave them alone. Let them have their moment together with no interruptions, for goodness' sake," said Lucifer.

"Just go back to your rooms," he added.

At that, the brothers dispersed and went to their respective rooms.

Before he left, however, Asmo gave Levi's room one last look and softly smiled.

"I'm happy for the both of you, MC, Levi."

[thefallennightmare]

It's me, again. Please act surprised that I'm here with yet another Landon thot. The whore on my shoulder will not shut up. This one is shorter than the other two but still just as nasty.

18+ CW BELOW THE CUT(face sitting, mustache riding, Landon being a munch, Landon being a simp for his dove.)

“Please sit on my face, dove. I want you to suffocate me.” 

I hovered over him, bearing my pussy to him, and held onto the headboard. Nerves wrecked through me with his words because we had never done this in our sex life. We’d only been together a few months so we were still experimenting. I’d never done this with any of my previous partners because I was afraid of sitting on their face and making it hard for them to breathe. 

“I’m afraid,” I admitted. 

Landon looked up at me between my legs and tenderly gripped my thighs. “I promise you, I’ll be fine. You won’t be too heavy if that's what you’re worried about.”

“Are you sure?” I asked, suddenly feeling small with his heated gaze. “How far do I sit down?” 

He positioned my body over his face, my pussy so close to his lips as his eyes pinned me from between my legs again. 

“All the way. If I can’t breathe, I’ll tap your thigh to let you know but I promise I can take it.” 

With a deep breath, I nodded and slowly sat down on Landon’s face, his mustache tickling me. His tongue immediately devoured me, fucking me as he held my thighs closer to his head. Landon’s breath was muffled as he continued his onslaught of my pussy, switching from fucking me with his tongue to sucking and biting on my clit. I grabbed the headboard to keep me upright when I let my head fall back, my hair skimming over my back. My jaw went slack when I felt the familiar flicker low in my gut and began riding his face; more so his mustache as it left marks in its wake on my thighs. 

Landon moaned his approval of me riding his face as his nails dug into the flesh of my thighs. I was so close, on the brink of of bliss, and when he bit down on my clit that was my undoing. I yelled out my release, panting his name over and over again. 

“Fuck,” he grazed his teeth over the inside of my thigh where he left mustache burns. “I hope this isn’t going to bother you.” 

In a post orgasmic haze, I fell to the bed next to him while snuggling closer into his chest. My arousal coated his mustahe and chin, Landon making no effort to clean himself. 

“I like to think of them as battle scars that I’ll wear proudly,” I joked with a laugh. 

His large hand sprawled over my lower back. “You looked so fucking beautiful sitting on my face, dove. I’ll be thinking of that image for a while.” 

I kissed the tattoos over his chest. “Give me a minute and I’ll be happy to do it again.” 

“Please,” Landon begged with a groan. 

[saveyourblood]

Pretty Boy - Ch 2 (Evan Buckley x Reader) (Eventual Buddie x Reader)

Summary: You can feel Buck staring. When your eyes meet his, you realize he’s staring at your hand, which is still on Eddie’s knee. You slowly retreat, which makes Buck turn his attention to your face. You smile softly. He just looks out the window. The one where you’re an advanced paramedic, Buck and Eddie are firefighters, and you think you might be in love with both of them.

Ch 1

A/N: This is such a niche story and I am desperate for validation, please tell me if you enjoyed reading! Word Count: 3.4k Warnings: descriptions of gun violence, mental health issues/suicide ideation (nothing overly graphic IMO)

Unlike some people who work in this building, you know how to take orders. So, instead of dragging your feet and prolonging the inevitable, you go to Bobby’s office the second you get back from the call. Hen tries to say something to you, but you’re so focused on having this conversation behind you that you ignore her. 

Despite the door being cracked open, you knock a few times. 

“Come in,”  Bobby says. 

You step in. He looks up. 

“Ah,” he remarks as if it’s a surprise to see you. “You can close the door behind you.” 

You close the door and lean against it. 

“Have a seat,” Bobby instructs as he files through some random papers. 

You let out a sigh. You were hoping to be in and out, but Bobby clearly has other ideas. Still, you do as you’re told. 

“I wanted to talk to you about what happened with Buck.”

As if you’d be in here for anything else. 

“Are you gonna write me up?” You ask instinctually. You’ve never been formally disciplined, so the question is gnawing at you. 

“Buck wants me to.”

You snort. “Buck wants a lot of things; most children do.”

“You’re a year younger than him,” Bobby points out. 

It’s true—Buck is 26, and you’re 25. But in this context especially, age is just a number. You’re a 25-year-old advanced practice paramedic with 3 years of experience who acts their age. Buck is a 26-year-old firefighter in his probationary period who acts like a frat boy.

“Are you going to write me up?” You repeat. 

Bobby gives you a look, then sighs with a crooked smile. “No. But if you do anything like that again, you’ll be hearing from me and Sergeant Grant.” 

“Fair enough,” you cede. 

There are a few silent beats in the conversation. This is why Bobby made you sit—he has more to say. 

“Why does he bother you so much?” Bobby asks.

“Literally everything I told him: he’s wreckless and he’s gonna get someone killed if he doesn’t change.” 

“So why not teach him to do better, to be better?”

“Trust me, Cap, I’ve tried,” you chuckle. “I mean, even earlier today, I taught him how to clear an obstruction in a neonatal airway. And honestly? For a few minutes, when he was running down the stairs with that baby in his arms, I thought, ‘Hey, maybe he isn’t so bad after all.’ And then he yells at Sergeant Grant, and he proves me wrong. Again.” 

“I’m talking to him and Sergeant Grant about how everything went down,” Bobby says. 

“I’m not telling you that to get him in trouble, I just…” You take a deep breath through your nose and let it out as a sigh. “It felt like no one was holding him accountable. And I’ve tried playing nice, and I’ve tried teaching him, and he still had the nerve to pretend that he can play god. And I just… lost it, and thought that maybe if I treat him like a man would, he would finally listen to me.”

Bobby nods, taking in everything you’ve said.  

“You think I don’t hold him accountable?” He eventually asks. 

You let out another sigh. “If Buck worked under any other LAFD Captain, they would have canned his ass about three months ago.”

“But is that the right thing to do?” Bobby counters. “This job is tough, and it isn’t something that can be taught overnight. Buck has potential—he could be an invaluable asset some day.”

“Is firing him the right call? Honestly, Bobby, I have no idea,” you admit. “But if people have to get hurt in order for Buck to be good at his job, then it isn’t worth the price.” 

Bobby ended up firing Buck a few days later. It wasn’t for what happened with Sergeant Grant; it was because, apparently, Bobby caught him having sex with some girl on a roof. He used one of the fire trucks to drive there. The moron didn’t realize they have GPS trackers. You got all of this information in a text from Hen. 

You turn the corner to the locker room, planning to put away your keys and wallet before starting your shift like you always do. You didn’t expect to see Buck sitting on the bench in front of the lockers. 

You plan on opening your locker, throwing your stuff in it, and leaving before Buck can say anything. The second you lift the lever, though, Buck turns his head towards you. 

He doesn’t say anything, and you definitely aren‘t going to break the silence. 

“So you heard, huh?” Buck says. 

You close your locker and spin the lock to scramble it. “Yeah, I did.” 

“Aren’t you going to say anything else?” 

“Tough break. Sorry, man,” you say with a shrug. You turn on your heel to leave.

“That’s it?” Buck says with a laugh. “A few days ago, you were slamming me against an ambulance, and now… nothing? Aren’t you supposed to say, ‘I told you so’?”

Buck doesn’t even work at the 118 anymore, and he still has a way of getting under your skin. You close your eyes, hoping you can gain some composure before you say anything.

“I’m sorry for pushing you; that was unprofessional,” you say and make your second attempt at leaving.

“But that’s all you're sorry for,” Buck says, rising to his feet. 

You turn around and eye him from head to toe. His chest isn’t puffed out in that hypermasculine way it normally is. Buck shifts his weight between feet, and when the pressure of your stare becomes too much, he breaks eye contact. 

“It’s like Sergeant Grant said: I didn’t say anything that wasn’t true,” you eventually reply.

“Then say it: you’re happy to see me go.”

Jesus Christ, he can be such a baby. 

“Okay, fine, you wanna go there?” you retort, taking a step forward. “You wanna know the worst thing about you, Buck?” 

He just looks at you. 

“You. You’re the worst thing about you. Because you could’ve been good. You’ve got decent skills, and you have heart, but you have no discipline. You can’t take orders, and you can’t look at a woman for more than thirty seconds without having sex with her. You’re a 16-year-old boy trapped in a 26-year-old man’s body, and ever since you started, you haven’t done anything to change it. You get in your own way and are too busy flirting or running your mouth to even realize it.”

You take another step towards him to ensure he hears what you’re about to say. “You could’ve been good. And I hope that shit haunts you. Because maybe, it’ll finally make you grow up.”

You start to make your exit again but linger in the doorway. You turn back around; there’s one more thing you want to say.

“I’m not happy to see you go, Evan. In fact, I was really hoping you would prove me wrong.”

And with that, you’re gone. 

You and Hen go out on a ‘shortness of breath’ call that ends up being a STEMI — a heart attack. You get him to the nearest hospital in five minutes, and if they can get him to the cath lab, he has a really good shot at surviving it. The patient’s wife hugs both you and Hen, thanking the two of you for doing such a wonderful job. You savor the feeling; most calls don’t end this way. 

When you pull into the station, there’s an engine missing. At first, you think it’s no big deal: the boys are probably out on a fire call. Then you see Bobby standing where the engine’s supposed to be.

“What’s going on, Cap?” Hen asks as she closes the door to the rig. 

“There’s an engine missing.”

“Yeah, clearly,” you chuckle. 

“There were reports of a residential break-in on Lambert Street in Winnetka,” Bobby continues. 

“Damn,” Hen whistles. 

You both heard something about that over the scanner on your drive back to the station; there was a suspected hostage, a young girl. Last you heard, the subject was trying to flee by motorcycle. 

“All of the 118 firemen are accounted for,” Bobby concludes.

You and Hen share a look. Who has a track record of borrowing engines without permission?

The truck pulls up and slowly backs into the garage. You catch a glimpse of the driver in one of the rearview mirrors. 

“Pretty Boy,” you say simply. 

Buck steps out of the truck, still wearing the jeans and long-sleeved grey shirt you last saw him in. “I know what this looks like.”

“Looks like you took the engine out in your street clothes,” Bobby says as he approaches the younger man. 

“I didn't really have time to change,” Buck counters. He doesn’t say it in his normal cocky tone, though. Frankly, he looks nervous. 

“Athena Grant called me, wanted to tell me what an asset you are.” Bobby continues. “Told her she was half right.”

Buck frowns. “Are you giving me another chance?” 

“You’ve used all your chances; so have I,” Bobby says, “because somehow I have failed to communicate to you how lucky we are to do what we do.”

Bobby starts to walk away, but Buck isn’t letting him get away that easy. 

“You're wrong, Bobby. I absolutely do get what a privilege it is to serve here,” Buck says, “and you know what? You were right to fire me.”

That makes Bobby stop dead in his tracks.

“I was a punk,” Buck continues, “still am one. But I'm a punk who understands what he lost. Just… needed you to know that.”

“I hope you mean that. Now go get dressed.” 

Buck stands cluelessly for a second, then turns to you and Hen. “I think I’m not fired.” 

“Your shift’s not over yet,” Hen points out. 

You go to follow her, but Buck stops you by calling your name. 

“I just wanted to tell you, uh…” Buck says, wringing his hands together. “I’m gonna prove you wrong.”

Normally, words like that coming out of his mouth would set your skin on fire. Between the tone of his voice and the look in his eyes, though, something in your gut tells you to hear him out. 

“Yeah?” You ask simply, waiting for him to elaborate. 

“Some day, I’ll be good,” he says, “but until then, I’ll be better.”

Buck extends a hand for you to shake. It’s the most chivalrous thing you’ve seen him do since you met him. You look at his hand, then at his eyes. There isn’t a trace of humor in his gaze. You take his hand and shake it. 

“I look forward to seeing it.”

Your first call of the shift is to an amusement park where one of the rides malfunctioned. A rider was thrown from the ride as it was moving, and it sounds like he’ll be DOA. When the operator deployed the emergency breaks, though, it meant the rest of the train stopped at the top of a loop, which one rider is now dangling out of. 

Buck is the first to volunteer to climb the ladder and harness the passenger. You’re not surprised. He’s grown a lot in the last few weeks, but he still jumps at every exciting opportunity, no matter how dangerous it may be. Maybe that’s just how Buck is. 

“Hey, he’s asking about his friend,” Buck radios once he’s at the top. 

“Chimney, how’s the kid on the ground?” Bobby radios. 

You look up and shake your head. 

“We lost him,” Chim radios back. 

“All right, I don't need the people up there seeing that. So, do me a favor... He survived, right? Get him on a gurney. You know the drill,” Bobby instructs.

“Copy that,” Chim replies. 

Once you and Chimney get him on the gurney and out of everyone’s sight, you look up at Buck. 

“Come on,” Chimney mutters encouragingly. “Come on, Buck.” 

After a painfully long minute, you see the man’s grasp on the rollercoaster falter. Then, you watch him let go. You close your eyes before you see him hit the ground, but the sound will echo off of your eardrums for a while. 

You go the rest of the night without seeing Buck; you don’t share another call, and when you’re not out in the field, you’re asleep in the bunks. It’ll probably kill you in the long run, but these days, you learn to sleep whenever and wherever you can. 

When you wake up for morning report and breakfast, Buck is already sitting at the table. You wipe the sleep out of your eyes and get a cup of coffee before sitting across from him. 

Bobby was nice enough to make breakfast; he knows how hard these calls are. No matter how many you get, it’ll never get easier. 

Bobby sets a plate in front of Buck. 

“I’m not hungry,” he says almost instantaneously. 

“This is America, Buckaroo,” Chim replies as he sets some silverware on the table. “Eating has nothing to do with being hungry.

“Man, I was right there. You know, all he had to do was reach up and grab my hand,” Buck says instead.

“People do funny things at times like that,” you offer, sipping your drink. “ Sometimes they just freeze up.”

“I’ve never lost anyone before,” Buck says quietly. He looks up at you. “Does it get any easier?” 

Bobby answers for you. “No.” 

“Look, people die, and that’s part of the gig, right?” Chim says as he sits next to you. “See, your problem is, you're looking at every job like it's a long-term relationship. They're one-night stands, man. In that moment, they mean everything to you, but once the morning comes... it's on to the next one.”

“How silly of me to think you’d say something productive,” you roll your eyes.

Chim furrows his brows. “What?”

“You’re such a man,” you say to Chim, then turn to Buck. “Look, dude, we all go through it, and you just have to figure out a way to deal with it,.” You pause. “You know why we wear these uniforms?”

“Sex appeal?” Chim answers, which earns him a quick kick to the shin from you. 

“So people can easily identify us,” Buck responds. 

“That’s true, but… I don’t know, I like to think it’s because when we take it off, we can leave it all behind us. Right now, you’re firefighter Buckley, but when your shift is over, you’re Buck. It just… symbolizes letting go, I guess.”

“I see his face every time I close my eyes,” Buck says. “Does that happen to you?” 

“It’ll pass,” you promise. 

“And if it doesn’t?”

You stare at Buck for a moment. It’s hard to imagine that this is the same man who mouthed off to a police Sergeant mere weeks ago. 

“Then you talk someone,” you eventually say. “A friend, a therapist, a bartender… you find a way to let it out, and then you let it go.”

 

Once again, you don’t see Buck for hours. You heard on the scanner that the 118 responded to several rescue calls, none requiring an RA unit. You spent the rest of your shift bouncing from call to call and ER to ER, seeing everything from stab wounds to childbirth. It’s shifts like this that remind you why you do what you do. It’s chaotic, stressful, and bloody, but it is fun. After a certain point, you don’t even have to use your brain; the adrenaline in your veins kicks your brain into autopilot, and your pounding heart is just along for the ride. 

You step into the communal locker room, completely exhausted. You still have to change, and considering everything you’ve witnessed, you should probably shower too. Most of all, you want to go home and crawl into your bed. 

Buck is sitting on the bench in the locker room, similar to how he was a few weeks ago after he was ‘fired.’ Just like you, he’s still wearing his uniform. His head is bowed between his shoulders as his elbows rest on his knees. This time, his head doesn’t perk up when you open your locker. 

“I heard you used The Manuever today,” you spark the conversation. “Nice save.”

Buck finally looks up and then chuckles quietly. “Yeah, if only I could’ve done that a few days ago.” 

You take a seat next to him. “Still thinking about Devon, huh?” 

“I’m trying not to, I just…” Buck says, then cuts himself off as he shakes his head. 

“It’s easier said than done,” you conclude. 

“Yeah.” 

“Yeah,” you agree. 

Both of you sit in comfortable silence for a few moments. You open your mouth a few times only to close it. You don’t want to tell this story; you hate even thinking about it. But if you’re going to sit here and tell Buck that he has to let things go, you have to do the same. It’s only fair. 

“The first person I lost… her name was Katherine Vanec. She was 17 years old, wearing a University of Washington shirt, white shorts, and black Converse High Tops. We got a call from her mother, who was at work when she started getting strange texts from Katherine. It was supposed to be a welfare check, and when the cops got there, they found her locked in her bedroom. When fire and rescue broke down the door, she had a .22 caliber revolver pressed to her temple.”

“Jesus,” Buck mutters. 

“Katherine had a history of Borderline Personality Disorder and suicidal ideation. She figured out that her high school sweetheart had been cheating on her for almost a year. They made plans together, I guess — they were gonna go to the same school, find a place off-campus to live together. He pulled the rug right out from under her, and she couldn’t take it.”

“So what happened?”

You smile sadly. “By the time we arrived, a negotiator had been talking to her for almost ten minutes. They thought she was in a good spot that all she had to do was put the gun down, and we would swoop in and 5150 her.”

“Involuntary admission,” Buck says. 

“Yeah,” you confirm. “That didn’t happen. When the negotiator asked her to set the gun down, she lost it. She kept talking about how every time before, she chickened out, and she couldn’t let that happen again. She turned the gun on us.”

“Suicide by cop.”

You nod as a few tears well in your eyes. Even all these years later, that case haunts you. “Her finger wasn’t near the trigger; she didn’t want to hurt anyone. She just didn’t want to be alive anymore, and she couldn’t think of another way out. I can still hear the sound of the bullets tearing through her.” 

“Why are you telling me this?” Buck asks softly. 

You wipe at your eyes and clear your throat. “Let it out and let it go,” you answer, then nudge his shoulder with yours. “Your turn.” 

Buck smiles; the expression is bittersweet. “I keep replaying what happened. I can’t shake this feeling that there’s something else I could’ve done. Maybe I could have grabbed his arm, or maybe there’s something I could’ve said differently.”

“Or maybe, no matter what you did, it was always going to end that way,” you suggest quietly. “Maybe he felt the same way Katherine did—like he had no other way out. We can try to rescue people, but we can’t make them want to be alive. Some people just don’t want to be saved, Buck.” 

“That really sucks.”

You laugh. “Yeah, it does. I guess that’s why we have each other; it makes it suck a little less.” 

“‘Each other’ as in you and me?” Buck asks in a lighthearted tone. 

You roll your eyes, but secretly, you’re thankful for the change of pace. “‘Each other’ as in the 118, which technically includes you and me.” 

“Sounds like a copout.” 

You laugh and clap a hand on Buck’s shoulder before standing. “Have a good night, Buck.”

You make it to the doorway before he says your name. You look back at him. 

“Thank you,” he says softly. 

You bite your lip, but it isn’t enough to conceal your smile. “Anytime.” 

[eightsixtiism]

As a Max fan, I do admit that Max isn't perfect and I absolutely adored Lando before especially with his friendship with Max and Carlos. Lando is getting hated mainly because of the things he says and some of his actions. One was the trump thing, second, was when Max was congratulating him and he decided to snitch despite the race being over (not a big issue for me personally cause all drivers snitch). Third is the way he acted when he won the Dutch GP especially when he decided to use Max's catchphrase (I know it wasn't Max's before), most of us found it rude especially since well max's catchphrase and Lando saying that seemed as if he was mocking Max and the worst thing was it was Max's home race. Fourth, the cooldown with Lewis when Lew was merely being nice and he decided to somewhat insult him (I feel insulted despite Lewis saying it was fine). Fifth, When he called Max's win in Brazil luck not talent, I mean luck was a part of it but talent had a much larger contribution. Sixth, when McLaren fucked up and he made his engineer beg for Lando to give the place back to Oscar despite him being only there because McLaren fucked up and Iscar was doing an excellent job defending (Fuck Mclaren strategy tbh). Seventh, podium in Hungary ('twas fucked up) Oscar couldn't even enjoy his win because Lando was the center of attention despite Osc having a phenomenal drive. Eight, when Oscar had to give up a win (it was a sprint but it was still a win) just for him to lose big time from Max. Ninth, when Oscar once again had to back off to give Lando a chance to catch up to Max but he couldn't pass Charles. Tenth, this is mostly due to how the FIA has been acting. They have been acting like a knight and shining armor for Lando, especially during the quali. This is not hate, I do think he is a contender for this season, the way he's been acting is somewhat the problem. (I think I have more but this is enough lmao)

there's a lot to be covered here so i'll answer the ones that caught my eye.

3) now that i've thought about it, i'd understand why max fans in particular would be mad about it. max coined the phrase, his friend essentially used it to take a dig at him. me personally, if this is what you're getting so seriously pressed about then i actually don't know what to say. this is a sport, shithousery will ensue between friends, enemies, acquaintances— everybody. it's not like lando completely ridiculed and encouraged any more hate towards max; i don't know if i can say the same for max, though.

4) that one i felt taken aback by it too. don't know why he said that, it's definitely something he could've avoided saying. but if lewis isn't bothered about it, i'm not going to be. if he was, i certainly would be and will hold lando accountable (i still do anyways)

5) this is so palpably hearsay and i cannot believe you still think this. at this point, i feel like a broken radio trying to reason with you guys and tell you that that is not what he meant. i'm sure you've come across people explaining what the actual meaning is, so let's not sit here and still believe this foolishness. if, for some reason, you still don't get it, there's a post here that explains it perfectly.

6 and 7) you are talking all about unrightful lando wins, but didn't lando have to give his place up for oscar? oscar didn't overtake lando by his own will and win, so why won't we use that against oscar? some people do, but we all know it was mclaren's fault for putting them in that position. they could've easily let them stay where they are and fight for p1, but they didn't and that is how it panned out. after them guilt tripping lando into giving the place back, are we still blaming lando for this? i know you shouldn't be because as you said, 'fuck mclaren strategy'.

8) mclaren were seemingly championship contending... up until they claimed they weren't after the brazil gp (honestly, odds were stacking up against them that they weren't because they kept fucking up more than they should've). i can tell you are either quite ignorant or haven't been a fan for long, because it seems you are too used to someone winning the championship by their own merit because of the very pitiful gap in performance between the red bull drivers, but forget that many championships have been won with the help of teammates, one of the most infamous being lewis and valterri. oscar giving up his place was to help lando (who's higher in the standings between the 2) get more points and close the gap. it wasn't a rightful sprint win, we are all aware, but that's how this sport works.

10) i was going to go hell on this take, but @landhoe-norris worded it perfectly in their post:

"Imagine thinking that an organisation that rigged a race so that your favourite drivers would win a championship, an organisation that has allowed him to run other drivers off the track for the past three years without repercussions, is now being biased against him because he ‘has the wrong passport’ when in all seriousness your favourite driver is the epitome of ‘white privilege’ and has been since he stepped into the sport."

there's nothing more for me to say.

all in all, lando is not as bad as you guys make him out to be. if anything, max, in my opinion, is worse. and looks like he'll always be.

[pumpkinpastiesandcoffee]

By Your Side Feet?

Nanami x GN! Reader

Summary: You're afraid of the dentist and your dutiful boyfriend finds a way to help

Words: 1387

Warnings: None! Just fluff, Nanami being the perfect sweetie he is

A/N: There's no specified gender, pronouns, race etc. The only thing specified is the fear of the dentist and how (I personally) feel about it, that's it! Just something super quick. I got inspired by @teddybeartoji (seriously go chek them out!! I love their fics) Toji dentist fic, made me think about how Nanami would look after you which I hope to remember next time I have to go to the dentist!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“It’s still bothering you, isn’t it” came Kento’s warm voice. Tinged with concern and almost perceptible disapproval. You, however, were nervously smiling up at him, acting as if you hadn’t just been caught massaging your jaw, “no, no it stopped, don’t worry.” Of course, you both new you were lying, something the two of you agreed to never do with one another and had stuck to over the course of your 2 year relationship. So it would be reasonable for Nanami to be annoyed, angry, betrayed feeling, anything like that. However, you’re seemingly infinitely patient boyfriend, held nothing but worry in his eyes as he peered down at you. Letting out a soft sigh, he sat down beside you on the couch of your shared home, hand coming up to cup your cheek, “You need to go to the dentist my love, before it gets any worse.” The deep frown that settled across your lips as you shrunk away from his kind but determined gaze had Kento feeling bad, he knew you disliked the dentist, even he wasn’t a fan, but he also knew you were in agony. It had been 2 weeks now, chewing food on the other side, making pained expressions and tentatively rubbing at your jaw when you thought he wasn’t looking and worst of all was the way you had teared up as you brushed your teeth.

The nervous shake of your head as you spoke only made him frown more, “It’s fine, Ken, it’ll sort itself out.” “Love, please, the pain isn’t worth it to avoid the dentist, I’ll come with you if that’d help at all?” He coaxed gently, the other hand reaching out and gently curling around your wrist to pull you into him. As his fingers settled against your pulse, he realised your heart was racing, and now he had a matching frown, “You’re that afraid?” Tears were quick to flood your lash line as you ducked your head, a feeling of shame swirling in your gut as you whispered, “Yeah.” Nanami wrapped his arms around you, pulling you into his chest as he rested his chin atop your head with a soft sigh.

He held you for a little while, waiting until you relaxed completely into him before speaking again, “Can you tell me why? Perhaps I can find some solutions for you, to make it easier.” With a deep sigh of resignation you tugged his hand into your lap, playing with his fingers to as you began to explain, “I never really worry about the pain, it’s never that bad, but the sensation of everything and how loud it all is just makes me so sick and always gives me a headache. Plus you can’t really move or anything, everything happens so fast and I never have a chance to prepare myself and even if you try to get them to stop they don’t always, just saying to hold on a bit longer. Just all of that is so overwhelming and makes me panic. Feels like I’m being tortured and can’t even move to get away. I know it’s stupid, but the fear and panic once it starts is just so all-consuming.” As you spoke, Kento listened intently, free hand gently rubbing along your back.

“First of all, it’s not stupid. Secondly, I had no idea it felt that way for you, for me its just, uncomfortable, but for you it sounds awful love, I’m so sorry.” He pressed a sot kiss to your temple, hoping to bring a bit more comfort. “I can come with you and we can ask about booking a longer appointment that way they can take their time. I can make sure they stop if you need a break and we can ask them to talk you through things so it’s not so fast. How does that sound?” Chewing nervously on your lip as you contemplated if that would actually help or not, eyes flickering up to meet his and relaxing a little again, “That could help.”

You’d spent the next hour talking about ways to make the whole thing easier on you, with the goal to make it tolerable more so than to fix it all. After that, Nanami had made an appointment for the following day and taking the day off work so that he could be with you the whole time as well as look after you afterwards. Despite all the preparation and talking, you were now sat in the dentist office, leg bouncing as you picked at your nails, mind reeling as the panicky feeling slowly climbed. Kento had signed you in and had just sat down beside you, hand coming to pry yours apart and interlock your fingers. “Breathe for me dear, deep breath in and hold, then out slowly, ready?” and he did as he asked of you, encouraging you to copy which you did. Between his calm hazel eyes and large warm hand encompassing yours, you felt that panic begin to subside, easing into a more manageable bubble of anxiety instead. That was until your name was called and it all came rushing back in an instant.

Nanami held your hand as you walked into the room, only letting go once you’d settled into the waiting dentists chair. He checked with the dentist before moving a chair over to sit by your feet, hand coming to rest on your ankle as a physical reminder he was there. The appointment took a long time, however every time you started to get jittery, Kento’s hands were massaging along your ankles and calves, the occasional softly spoken “You’re doing so well love” a reminder you weren’t alone. A reminder you weren’t trapped, that you could make it through. When you motioned for breaks the dentist listened after the first time where he had hesitated and was met with the clearing of Nanami’s throat and cold, stern look. The image would stay with you forever of you’re doting boyfriend, staring down your dentist and you couldn't help the small smile that tugged at your lips in response.

The second you were out of the chair, Nanami was pulling you in to his arms, pressing a kiss to the top of your head, “You did great, I’m so proud of you love, I love you.” And if the dentist and assistant were looking at you both funny, neither of you cared enough to notice, no, instead you were tucking yourself into him with a muffled “thankyou, I love you so much Kento, thankyou.” You walked back out, hand in hand, to pay for the appointment before leaving and climbing into the car. “Now, as promised, lets get that drink you love so much. We’ll order your favorite for dinner rather than lunch seeing as you’ll be numb for a little while” He mused, ruffling your hair as he pulled out of the clinic parking lot. “Hey, Ken, thankyou, really. You didn’t make me feel silly or childish, it sucked but it wasn’t as bad as it usually is so, thankyou.” He smiled, eyes flickering over to you before taking your hand in his, entwining your fingers as he brought them up to kiss the back of your hand. “Of course, I love you, I’ll never treat your fears as silly or childish. I’m just glad I helped even a little bit.”

The rest of the day was spent doing things you loved while Kento babied you. Curled up in Kento’s arms on the couch with a comfort movie playing was a great way to spend your afternoon, it certainly helped the memory of the dentist fade quickly. So, as you curled up together in bed for the night, face peppered in kisses from Kento that had you giggling, you couldn’t help but feel nothing but love. Love for Kento Nanami, a man who would drop everything to make you feel better, who never once would belittle your fears, who thought you were simply the most beautiful human being ever and truly felt happy just to be in your presence. The love held for one another truly shone in times like this, where he knew everything that made you happy and comfy and where you felt safe and stronger with him by your side, or in this case, your feet.

[chickthiccs]

I don't usually get involved in stuff like this because I want this blog to be silly/goofy, but this one had a huge impact on me so I think it's only fair I say something.

Seeing someone who was frankly abusive towards me and especially my best friend being called out by so many people... it really means a lot to me. Because I was starting to doubt myself - am I the problem? Because when I said how I was hurt, it was turned back on me because me saying how they hurt me hurt them. And I was the bad guy. Which now I realise is gaslighting. And do you know what, compared to others I was barely targeted, yet I was still really hurt. So I can't imagine how some of you feel.

But now I see it's not just me, it's... well everyone, pretty much. If you've been hurt by this person, or by anyone, my inbox is always open and I'm here to chat <3

All of us have made mistakes, no one's perfect, but when you're picking apart someone's every action, acting like you own them and trying to control them and stop them from pursuing romantic relationships with others after being rejected, that goes past the line.

And if you send me abusive messages - you know who you are - like you did to others, I'm just going to post it on my blog so don't even bother. leave me alone, I want nothing to do with you. I tried for so long, and it was never enough for you. Please just leave us all alone.

This fandom is a lovely and supportive place where I've made so many friends, too many to list here, and I want to thank you for all your support.

[izzyy-stuff]

For your 300 follower bash, can I request a short story/drabble where the reader is either the sixth member of TXT or a member of a gg like maybe Le Sserafim or Aespa and is in a relationship with any member (I'm ot5 so it really doesn't matter who <3) I do kind of like the idea of Hyuka being the love interest and can totally picture the other members teasing him a lot, but again any member is fine <33

𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐋 - 𝐇𝐔𝐄𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐊𝐀𝐈

bf!blond!Kai x fem!reader

in which no matter how much his friends tease him about his girlfriend, he knows they love her just as much as he does.

wc 1.4k

warnings kissing, slightly suggestive

↪ izzy speaks... first fic for the 300 bash!! I am happy it's with huening too! I've been meaning to use these pictures for a while now.

event post | event masterlist

The smile on your face slowly fades away as you watch the three dots disappear, leaving you on ‘seen’. You raise an eyebrow in confusion, but you don’t get a chance to pay it any more attention as your best friend, Yunjin, wraps her arm around your shoulders, smirking.  

“Look who’s being all lovey-dovey again,” she teases, giggling as she snatches your phone. “You guys are so adorable it makes me sick.” Kazuha and Chaewon share a laugh with her, shaking their heads at the brunette. “Hey! Give it back! I’m in the middle of a conversation!” You try to take your phone back, but it only leads to more of Yujin’s laughing. 

Little did  you know that your dear boyfriend Kai is in the same situation as you, hiding his face in embarrassment as Beomgyu holds his phone. 

“Can’t wait to see you again,” Beomgyu reads out loud, running around the room. Usually, he wouldn’t dare to do something like this. It was Kai’s privacy, and there was no way he would cross the line, but a dare was a dare. 

“Just read it all! Get it over with,” Kai whines, his cheeks red as he stares down at his lap, listening just like everyone else. “Oh, god. I’m not reading that. That’s for sure,” Beomgyu frowns, catching Yeonjun’s attention. The youngest’s eyes widen as he realizes what chats one of his best friends has just stumbled upon. “No, no, no, don’t look through that! This far is enough. Give it back,” the blond looks up again, his eyes full of fear and awkwardness. 

But before Beomgyu can do as he asked for, Yeonjun is already up, stealing the phone from him. “Yeonjun!” Kai yells, his mind too clouded with thoughts to use honorifics. “Oh my god!” The eldest gasps. “How can our fans call you an angel?” He dramatizes. “You’re nasty.” 

“Just kill me,” Huening sighs, closing his eyes. Taehyun chuckles, patting his back. “It’s not the end of the world,” he reminds the blond, rolling his eyes when he notices Yeonjun taking pictures of the chats on his phone. Sometimes, he doubted if Jun was actually the eldest of them all. “It might be, though! She is going to kill me if she finds out you’ve read our chats.” 

“I won’t tell a soul,” Yeonjun proclaims, still laughing as he hands Kai his phone back. “But I’m glad you don’t act like a complete angel, at least with your girlfriend. Honestly, the whole innocent act has been freaking me out.” 

“I’m not even going to say anything to that,” Kai answers, gripping his phone tightly as if he were scared someone might take it away from him again. “Now, answer your girl. You don’t leave a girl waiting when she asks to hang out.” Hyuka rolls his eyes at him, opening his phone again, “I’m not stupid. I know what to do and what not.” 

“Right,” Beomgyu is the first to scoff, but it doesn’t move Kai a bit. Once his girlfriend had his attention, nothing bothered him anymore. 

♡⸝⸝  

You watch Sakura, Yujin and Kazuha go over the choreography repeatedly, mentally going over the steps along with them. You definitely couldn’t say you would excel the dance yet, but you’ve had enough for today. If you went through the choreography again, your legs might as well give up. 

“Okay, we’re clocking out now! Have fun!” Eunchae grins, swinging her bag over her shoulder while Chaewon stands beside her wearing the same annoying smirk. You catch Yujin rolling her eyes and have to laugh. “I am going to leave in a bit, too,” you say, and your best friend immediately turns to you. “What? I thought we were grabbing dinner together after practice!” She complains. 

You open your mouth to answer her, but all that leaves your lips is a shaky breath full of regret. You squeeze your eyes shut as you remember the plans you made, clapping your hands together and muttering a quiet “sorry” through them. Yujin sighs when she notices your eyes. She can’t even blame you. Not when you seem so genuine with your apology. “I kind of…forgot about it,” you admit. “And made plans with Kai instead.” 

“Alright then. You’re lucky I know Kai has been busy, and you haven’t seen him much lately,” she shakes her head, and you smile again, jumping up to hug her. “Thank you, thank you!” Yujin smiles as she wraps her hands around you. “We can have dinner tomorrow. What do you think?” You ask hopefully, and she chuckles, nodding. “Go hang out with your boyfriend now,” she says, pushing you toward the door with a laugh. 

“I’ll see you tonight! Bye!” You quickly wave at Sakura and Kazuha before the door closes behind you, and you stand in the hallway, beaming as you notice your boyfriend sitting on the side, scrolling on his phone. “Hey,” you greet him quietly, making him raise his head immediately. “You should have come in. No one would mind.” Kai grabs his bag from the bench, slightly shaking his head as he walks to you. “It’s fine,” he assures you before gently pressing his lips on yours, one of his hands wrapping around your waist while the other rests on your cheek. “Hi, pretty,” he mumbles his greeting against your lips, making you bite your bottom lip to constrain your smile. 

Hyuka holds your hand as you walk through the HYBE building, telling you about his practice and some of the stupid dares they did during their break – purposefully not mentioning the one involving his friends reading your chats – while you tell him about your practice and the main points of your new choreography, bragging about how fun they are. 

He only lets go of your hand when you get to the entrance, smiling as he lets you walk outside first, watching you walk to your car while he waits for a few minutes, just like he did many times before in order not to get anyone suspicious about your relationship with him. People don’t need to know that you’re on your way to his dorm. 

♡⸝⸝  

You chuckle at the familiar voices as you step inside the dorm room. You feel at home. Not only because of your boyfriend, but also his friends, who’ve never been anything but welcoming to you. 

“Don’t mind then. Beomgyu and Soobin got immersed in League again,” Yeonjun simply waves at you as he passes the front door on his way to his room. “Taehyun just finished making dinner, or you know where the snacks are,” he smiles. “Thank you,” you smile back, taking off your shoes. 

It doesn’t take much longer for Hyuka to arrive, too, pulling you in for a hug as soon as he gets to you. You giggle, wrapping your arms around him and relaxing. “Have they been bothering you a lot?” Your boyfriend asks softly, and you swear you could get lost in his eyes when they lock with yours. You shake your head, grabbing his hand. “You know that’s not possible.” You’re right. No matter how much his friends tease him about you whenever they get the chance, they love you just as much as Kai does. He has to smile, remembering all the times they had told him how happy they were for him. 

“Right,” Kai mumbles quietly, his eyes on your hand holding his as you take him to his room. 

No matter how much time he spends with you, every moment and touch will always be as important to him as when you first got together. “Get a room!” Beomgyu yells, making Hyuka snap out of his thoughts. “Shut up!” He yells back at him, hiding his flushed cheeks as he follows you. 

You never need to do much with Kai to have fun. Honestly, you prefer not to do anything when you’re with him. Being able to relax after a long day with some lazy kisses and back rubs sometimes means so much more than having big plans. And today is no different. 

Kai tugs your hair behind your ear and pulls you in for a kiss as soon as he sits on his bed. You get comfortable on his lap, grinning into the kiss as you close your eyes. “You’re so pretty,” he mumbles against your lips. “I haven’t been in the shower yet. I’m all stinky,” you laugh, cupping his cheek. “Still beautiful,” he assures you, not wasting any time and pressing his lips on yours again, unable to get enough. “I love you.” 

“I love you too,” you whisper back with a smile.

⋆✶ izzy's tags @beomiracles @seoulzie @adel222 @inkigayocamman @flowzel @love-be0m @virgo-and-libra @hwanghyunjinismybae @liaatiny @minaateez ✶⋆ Want to get notified? Join taglist here !