#I know how old they are but I hate specifying what specific time the story plays in

[fuckwhoeverpickedallthefunnyurls]

I'm on World Anvil right now (a really good website for authors btw!!) trying to make an article for one of my characters but the thing is. I only know the randomest shit about them. No they do not have surnames bc why bother if they'll never be brought up. Year of birth? Um, well, you see-

[idcallmyselfhuman]

XiaoAether Masterlist 👹⛅

Edit: version 2.0 here

Or, every XiaoAether moment that I can remember (and an attempt to organize them)

Starting this off with the one scene that made us all go "wait a fucking minute" at the very start of the game,

Battle of Osial

Aether's feet were already steadied. Xiao could've let go, or let him fall as gracefully as Mountain Shaper did to that guard (I would've hated him forever) but considering that he insists that being near mortals is such a biiiig no-no, he could have, but he didn't. No, even more, he fucking tightened his hold.

-

Teyvat Food Notes (Sweet Dream, Adeptus' Temptation and Satisfying Salad)

Next! The promotionals during Xiao's release as a playable character. Specifically, Teyvat Food Notes. To celebrate his release, they made an Almond Tofu + Sweet Dream Food blog.

Note: Both google translate and Papago seem to use Mandrill instead of Xiao, so... just know that's who it's talking about.

This is where we learn that Xiao didn't even make "Sweet Dream"; this dish was Aether's thank you gift to him. Xiao's specialty dish is a gift from Aether. I'm- agh. ANYWAY.

We actually also see Sweet Dream in Childe's birthday art. And I'm really sorry to Tartaglia but seeing it stole all his thunder. I could not get over it.

I like to think Aether was so busy making Childe food that he absentmindedly started preparing Almond Tofu in the way he's used to (because of how often Xiao requests it :'> ).

Just when I thought that was it for the Teyvat Food Notes and I could've moved on, I found this in the Adeptus' Temptation food note; the one they made for the first Lantern Rite.

Note: "Fairy/Buddha Jump over the Wall" is apparently an actual Chinese delicacy that the Adeptus' Temptation is based on!

I found this part really cute, especially right now because of the poetry event. Since the beginning, Aether's always known that Xiao was capable of being poetic, it just took them being close and his encouragement for Xiao to actually make a poem.

Lastly, Aether's Satisfying Salad. This isn't connected to the food blog this time (since that one's for Mona), but rather, this and Almond Tofu are the first dishes Aether has ever given Xiao in the game. I included this despite it being pretty minor because in Moonlight Merriment, Smiley Yanxiao actually brings this up again.

Smiley Yanxiao: The boss told me to take care of him, but this guy, let me tell you - he is one tough nut to crack. He usually turns his nose up at everything that isn't Almond Tofu.

Xiao willingly ate something that wasn't Almond Tofu because... because what, it was given to him by a cute blonde traveler? The jury's still out on that one.

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Lantern Rite 1.3, Baizhu Story Quest

I'm sure we're already familiar with this scene, right?

The very first time Xiao promised Aether that no matter what, as long as he calls his name, he'll be there. Right after that was Moonlight Merriment, where the game literally specifies that Xiao made that promise just for Aether. Way to make your commitment subtle.

Ah, Xiao, you're so easy... Of course, this wouldn't be the last time that Aether calls for him and Xiao arrives immediately. This also happened during Baizhu's story quest to, yet again, the astonishment of everyone around excluding these two. (Xiao's dedication is one of a kind)

Xiao worries over Aether often, despite knowing that they're both formidable in their own right. I also think it's sweet how every time they meet, Xiao's departing words are always a reminder to call for him whenever needed, to the point where there are times that Aether just goes "Yeah, we know." before he can even finish the sentence.

Unfortunately, though, there is one time where Xiao failed to reach Aether when he called him, but only because he physically wasn't able to.

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Perilous Trail (Interlude)

The only thing that prevented this man from getting to Aether like always was being in a different plane of existence. Romeo and Juliet wish they were this romantic istfg

Aether: Come find us.

Xiao: No.

Yanfei: But Aether's in trouble!

Xiao: How do we meet?

Now where else did someone pull this tactic recently-

...Again, XIAO YOU ARE SO EASY. But anyway, back to the Chasm bc I wasn't quite done with that-

As soon as Yanfei tells Aether that Xiao is awake, Ae comes running. Just full on "stop saying you're fine i'll be the judge of that"

And he looks so angry when Xiao brings up writing a will. augguh they are sooooo- (i would put a reaction pic here if i didn't have an IMAGE LIMIT fuck tumblr bro)

To finish off the Chasm Interlude on a more serious note, this entire conversation was really touching, and I love seeing the progress these two have made over the years. Xiao letting himself open up with Aether's help year by year is one of my favorite things about this game.

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Teapot and Character Voice Lines + Birthday Letters

For the first and second Lantern Rite, Xiao was still adamant on not even stepping foot in Liyue Harbor, declining every invitation to go there because of how much he disliked being near mortals.

Yet in his teapot voicelines, once you reach a high enough friendship with him, Xiao actually takes the initiative to invite Aether to go to the city, if only to understand him better. Xiao explicitly says that his willingness to go to the harbor was for him.

More About Xiao I: I'm willing to protect you.But don't think about getting close, and stay out of my way, or all that awaits you is regret.

More About Xiao V: It's too late. The connection between us is too strong. Even if you wanted to, it's too late to sever it. Hm? You've never thought to sever it?

About Shenhe: It seems Shenhe places a great deal of trust in you. Well, how could she not. There are few people in the world as kind and good-natured as you.

Shenhe, About Xiao: My first impression of him was that he's not one to smile. After meeting him again more recently, however, he's still as reserved as ever, but… he seems a lot more relaxed now. Maybe he… met someone special.

That line by Shenhe made me happy. Aether's effect on Xiao benefitted not only him, but the people surrounding Xiao as well. We even see that in his birthday letters, where at the most recent one, he follows Ae's advice and goes to spend time with old friends.

They're also all just insanely romantic, I feel like that goes without saying. Every year, I wonder how Genshin would possibly top the one before it that isn't just an explicit confession of undying love.

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Lantern Rite '23

I'm here to remind you all of a beautiful scene that should never be forgotten for years to come.

Regardless of Genshin trying to be mysterious and making us guess who saved Aether, the fact that they both came rushing over is incredible on its own. They know that Aether isn't a damsel in distress, and Paimon's acting was so on the nose, but they still couldn't allow even the slightest possibility of harm to come to him.

Xiao looking away and talking in circles just to say he really was worried is the funniest fucking thing.

For the Lantern Rite event itself, if you've read this far in, you're probably already familiar. I really wish there wasn't an image limit because I have so many screenshots I want to put in here. If you want a refresher, watch this and start around the 2-hour mark

I wanted to put my own video in the post but you can only put one :/// I'm fist fighting whoever put these limits. 1 video file and 30 images? who are you

BACK TO THE TOPIC

There really isn't much I could say that I haven't already said before. For XiaoAether shippers, this was hoyo spoonfeeding content on a silver spoon. It's Aether and Xiao at their most comfortable with each other, talking and spending time with the people they care about. It's Aether fulfilling his end of the bargain of bailing Xiao out of uncomfortable social situations, because if you haven't noticed throughout all of these examples (or even outside of that), Aether is so perceptive when it comes to the comfort of the people around him.

This was also the event where we find out that for Xiao, the most distinguished guest in his eyes was Aether (Even though Ae thought he was going to say Zhongli..)

I have a lot of love for this event. But since this isn't just a lantern rite post, I'll move on.

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Waterborne Poetry

The catalyst for this post. The reminder of how lovely this ship is, and how far these two have come.

As we have all learned from Xiangling, Yanfei, Venti and Hu Tao, you only need to mention Aether's name to convince Xiao of whatever it is you're planning. The part where Aether and Team Chongyun were trying to convince him to come with them and touch some fucking grass was really cute.

This event and the previous Lantern Rite also had Aether and Xiao talking privately, only to get interrupted by Paimon/Xiangling (as well as calling them out lmao)

And, of course, the scene that everyone freaked out over,

This. I don't think I'll ever get over this.

The fact that they had Zach voice this- A short, but sweet moment where Aether looks at Xiao from afar and immediately gets inspired, performing a poem where the real meaning is shared only between the two of them...

And Xiao's smile.

An expression that Aether had done so well to bring out.

2023 was the year of XiaoAether. Thank you, Hoyo.

-

Done! I HAVE SO MANY SCREENSHOTS AND I COULDN'T EVEN USE MOST OF THEM ToT. I actually had clips that I edited but Tumblr said no. Good thing there's YouTube.

Another reason as to why I made this was because some shippers said that XiaoAe didn't make sense because it lacked depth and I was so affronted by it that I did all this out of spite (and love for these characters. mostly love.)

[stargirlie25]

Disclaimer: This post has no real point its honestly just a big old anti E/riel post!

''The comments SJM made about Elucien are outdated!''

What about comments about feysand and nessian in the SAME post?

She talks about all 3 of the pairings 2 times. Together.

WHY does no understand that when book 1 came out, acomaf was already written and Elucien and feysand were confirmed mated pairs.

When acomaf was already released for a while, SJM made comments about nessian,feysand,elucien in a post while Acowar was already written.

She was drafting ACOSF to see nestas story and how it would go and considered a threesome scene with Az,cas,and nes while elriel was supposed to be endgame?

FoUR boOKs of FOreSHadOwinG and she had Mor AND Az pins during acomaf? Four books of FOreSHadOwinG when she had pins for Elucien?

Four books of FOreSHadOwinG YET she considered a threesome scene even though Az x mor was supposedly ditched so elriel could happen IN Acowar?

All tho then, SJM flunked the idea because in comes Azriels new love interest, Gwyn. Keep in mind Nesta had those thoughts about Az BEFORE she saw him and Gwyn interact. So much for Nesta being your OG elriel shipper. She never thought of Az like that again!

Also have y'all ever realized that in order for Elnotreal to be endgame, almost every single elriel theory has to come true?

1.Elain and Luciens bond HAS to be fake-she can't just reject the bond. I mean she can she has all rights DUH but it will follow her for her entire life. She will constantly feel the protectiveness over her mate. Randomly defending them. Jealousy,passion and worry. Is that what you what for your girl? You want her to struggle with her relationship with Azriel while the bond still follows her? Also Azriel, he will never be at peace.

2.Elriel HAs to be mates-Azriel wants a mate. He says ''how come the third was given to another'' he doesn't even specify Lucien and Elains names just feels that he was meant to be with the third and is confused why they were given to another. Elain could be anyone. Lucien could be anyone. He wants a mate. Elain looks at him with trust, gives him gifts while got Lucien nothing and allows him permission to kiss her YET Az is still jealous and insecure. Still holds a immature grudge against Lucien. No matter how hard they can try, Elain will never be what he truly wants and needs. A mate who sees him for everything he is.The cold and warm the good and bad the soft and brutal the ugly and beautiful the dark and light. That's not Elain. His shadows hide from her and he practically hates himself around her. Even when his shadows gather around him when he heard about Elain/nestas fight THAT was a negative impact which put him in a sour mood. The shadows never react in a positive way or a new way with Elain. Its either negative or something that already happened with mor. His shadows around Gwyn are playfull and calm and so is Az at the same time! He doesn't even know how he feels about Elain. He still can't decipher his feelings for Mor. He claims she is his but has not thought of anything other then sex with her for over a year. With Elain and Mor, he is stuck at Point A. What's important about a relationship is that you KNOW how you feel about the other. You can identify what feeling they spark in you.

Questioning your religion isn't a good thing. Knowing who you are with YOUR person is a good thing.

3.Vassien HAS to happen-SJM loves Lucien. It's clear as day. Ships wars aside, he will end up happy. He has suffered for centuries while az has had the comfort of his inner circle for centuries. He will end up happy and that's final. So HE HAS to be with vassa if its not Elain even though its hard for mated males specifically to get over the bond and the fact that he is uninterested in anybody but Elain. Even though he compares vassa with Feyre.

4.Lucien has to turn human or Vassa has to be Fae-This is so straight up I can not even. SHE will die century's before him if they remain as they are. Is Luciens happy ending 60 years or so? Then what? She just does? And no hate to vassa is Lucien just going to stick with an 80 year old orrr can't vassa stick with another 80 year old? (jurian) anyways so Vassa has to be fae even though she is desperate to reclaim her human body, land and kingdom. Or Lucien has to human even though he has an important role in the day court.

5. if no vassien than Lucien has to be a bad character-Because if feysand happened while Tamlin was being the most perfect guy ever, wouldn't we all pity him and hate feysand? So if Elriel happens and vassien does not, Lucien has to be a bad character or at least an asshole so we can move clearly support Elriel. Because without Lucien, there is no Elriel. The only reason they have any conflict is because of Elain and Luciens mating bond. Like respectfully Azriel needs to get out. You have your own conflict. He can't eat her coochie because of LUCIEN VANSERRA! Anyways if Elriel happens and vassien does not, SJM will have to set up Lucien to be some arrogant pushy male while she portrays Az to be the respectful hero not that I will ever fall for that trap. Not that I will even read an elnotreal book.

6.Jurian has to betray the BOE-Hello? He has so much potential with Vassa. HE is human. HE lost his kingdom while Vassa is desperate to reclaim her human like including her kingdom. THEY BOTH HAVE THE SAME VISION FOR THE FUTURE. Two sides of the same coin? At eachothers throats? If Elriel then vassien then what the hell is the boe? What do y'all think Jurian will just chill by himself while Vassa and Lucien are in the day court or fae lands? NO! Like elriels assume, he has to betray them because at least majority are smart enough to know that Lucien is a key player.

7.Gwyn has to be a lightsinger or evil.-Its either its her power or shes his mate. Elriels want it to be specifically a light singer or even more so evil and some believe they do not need it. Like his chest is quite literally sparking just like Ruhn with Lidia HER MOST RECENT mating pair. He feels calm around her. Like bryce w hunt,nesta w Cass,nesryn w sartaq,chaol w yrene, aelin w Rowan etcccc! he can't simply continue to look at her with admiration and carry an image of her eyes lighting up while being with Elain. Elriels say the spark is her power which okay whatever but when you talk about the image he keeps tucked down of Gwyns eyes lighting up and it glows? Downright saying Gwyn is evil and she planted it there. Unless your saying Clotho is evil? The only things Sjm can make true are 1. Gwyn is evil and she planted that to lure Az 2.Clotho is evil and planted the image to trick him. 3.Gwyn is simply Azriels mate. Which is not bold to assume and come true considering everybody assume ruhnlidia was mates and boom.

8.E/riel as elriels say will adopt a kid.-Its not even an insult to Elain or Azriel when I say they can't have kids. Even for Nesta it was a risk but now that she made a deal for her and Feyre it isn't. Also nesta isn't even ready for kids.SJM said recently that her ideal happy ending is getting married and having lots of kids not to mention Azriel wants kids? This isn't putting down Elain. They can still adopt but here is the thing thats a theory and in order for SJM to give her ideal happy ending they would need to adopt a kid. My whole point of these are the fact that fan theories almost never come true. Almost all of them has to desperately happen for e/riel to make sense and that simply not realistic.

Look at all the crap that has to happen for elnotreal

The only theories I have for Elucien and gwynriel is how the already revealed plots will play out. I don't have to dismantle the whole fucking series because of their endgame. The only thing with elucien and gwynriel that needs to happen is time and healing. No silly blood duel or evil lightsingers. No betrayal or cauldron was wrong crap. There is no way SJM will take our attention away from the real plot to say ''the cauldron was wrong! Brb koschei let us deal with this!''

[y2ksnowglobe]

Deep appreciation for episode 30 (Van on the Run)

This is a long post where I just ramble on all the moments that make me love this episode.

The dethroning of fleshlight tag as the worst thing that anyone ever said.

The "Hey Andrew" story

Big old butt crack down the middle of the orb

Terry Jr. asking why Ron isn't wearing pants

"I'd better write that down as a note. Terry Jr., easy to lie to."

Lark literally taking a note about how unpaid interns die sometimes. (This turns into my firm belief that Mae Hailes is a paid intern)

Ron insisting Paeden is his half-brother. "My dad is my dad too!"

just gonna weep and tear my hair out real quick over that one.

Ron's insights on the patriarchy

"My stepson is here, and I am looking at him in the eye right now and it's not weird at all. It's not weird. We're just making eye contact right here." "It's a little weird. You have not blinked in several minutes." "Now it hurts to blink, so I'm not going to ever…" "That's not how it works. You have to blink." "No. It's like my eyes are getting…" "Dad, blink." Like what a way to start normalizing Terry Jr. calling Ron "Dad"

Sparrow's stealth hug

Just...starting to really see the dead inside Grant is both heartbreaking and really funny.

Nick's shaky fist bump makes me wanna cry.

I am always there for a good low perception roll joke.

Reveal that Ron just carries to lure that killed Willy around with him.

"Yeah! Your dad is George Washington!"

THEORY TIME: Like this episode is where we get most of our information about the kids' time in Ravenloft, and like...I don't buy it. Looking at how the kids phrase things, I've been solidly convinced that the O-Dads have Geas'ed the hell out of these kids so they can't give any specific details about what was done to them, but I feel like there's a loophole where they can talk about things that weren't done. So, for example: Nick specifies that Bill ignored him. I'll keep coming back to this as we keep going.

Weird detail: Darryl is with Glenn on the murder Henry's dad train at the start.

God I love to hate Barry Oak so much, he makes me skin crawl and he is in top form in this episode.

"I AM DRIVING WITH MY FRIENDS, FATHER! I'LL TALK TO YOU LATER!" It's such a teenager-y thing to say and I feel like it really gives a snapshot into what their relationship was like back in the day.

I really wanna get a snapshot into Nick's mind as he hears his dad completely lose his cool about Barry. Like, my boy did such a good job trying to act unbothered and brave, and then Glenn just is deeply and visibly upset about Barry almost killing him (which is valid, I just feel like it's a new experience for Nick)

Lark and Sparrow jumping in to drive when Henry lets go of the wheel. Like, not sure what happened with Sparrow, but Lark has been an epic driver from the get-go.

ANOTHER THEORY: Sparrow is really interesting in this episode. He willingly covers his ears when asked by Henry, and he's the one who hits the brakes when Henry tells them to stop the car. He's also just weirdly chill and forgiving, and like...I do not buy this as love wolf shit, he is clearly under some kind of magical influence to make him more compliant. You do not get the Sparrow that looks scared in the drone footage in episode 28 to this remarkably chill and forgiving kid without magical interference.

Freddie putting his foot down that Glenn would not mess with firearms while drunk

Barry's "Oh kakaw kakaw" when he's shot is probably in my top ten vocal stims from this show.

Lark enthusiastically supporting Glenn shooting Barry makes me so happy

Henry going from trying to be firm and calm as Glenn loses his shit, and immediately shifting to "ooooh, I hate you so much" as soon as Barry starts talking to him is so funny. Just all the ideals fly out the window.

Find it super interesting how Henry cites "respecting his choices" as a thing here considering what happens later on with the bracelets.

I both do and don't want to know if Anthony already had the idea for the Lark and Sparrow homunculi when Barry offers letting Henry take his kids and run and giving up all the other kids. Like regardless of whether or not it was planned, I do love the idea that Barry is giving this offer because he knows he's got the real ones tucked back in Oakvale.

I love the word abscond, okay?

Love Barry framing his failure as a father as disappointment in Henry's choices. I want to kick him in the face.

Mr. Mustache calling Ron "Honey"

"No. You just exasperatedly asked why a bunch of times. A.k.a. the Henry Oak special."

Geas theory follow up: Lark telling them they forgot to feed them fits into the loophole of being something the granddads didn't do, so they're allowed to mention it. Also this part of starting to hint at what exactly went down is so just *chefs kiss.*

Freddie's "WHY?" When Matt asks if Darryl can perceive that Ron peed his pants.

Freddie being told the charm needs to be in an enclosed space and immediately going "What if we had an umbrella?"

Freddie picking the first audio result for Fantasy Tavern for the sound.

"Bring us your hottest moms!"

This next bit always slays me and I don't even know why:

The jokes about the level one adventurer group is beautiful. I hope things turned out okay for that fighter and four rogues.

Henry making up Mr. X only for Mr. X to be real.

Ron thoroughly describing the fake voice he's going to do, only to reveal it's just his normal voice.

Ron's whole exchange with the other rogues.

Henry describing Glenn's fantasy voice as Italian

Anthony trying to keep up with what the crew are trying to do as they're attempting to get a room.

Also, everything is in shillings now for no adequately explained reason?

The random bar patrons who are gonna be so disappointed when they make it to the other side of town to find out that Hi I'm Ron is not playing.

The start of the NPCs realizing they could have asked for more money gag.

Glenn almost going to see what's up with Mr. X but then getting bored.

Anthony doing a C3P0 impression

Geas Theory update: Grant phrases it as "they weren't nice" and the most detail we get from Grant is that "Willy's really mean" only for him to then say, "It was fine, I guess." Terry tops out at saying that Willy "shouted at them a fair number of times" and that's as intense as any of their descriptions get. Like this is sus as heck. Especially since at minimum, we know that Lark and Sparrow got homunclui'd and that somehow, Barry got the twins to sit quietly. The boys are underselling this and the only one that would be in character for would be like...Nick (who we already saw was super shaky). Darryl even prompts Grant saying it's okay if it was rough and they were scared and we still get no further information.

Ron's scary story is so good for so many reasons. Like the way he tries to make it spookier by making Willy a man with a fishingpole for an arm, by calling fish "food that breathes underwater" like that mixed with the realization that he's telling the story of how Willy died is just...an excellent combo of scary and not scary and it's just a baffling bunch of weird that is pure Ron.

Terry being baffled by Ron asking if they want to sing Rock-a-bye Baby, only for it to turn out Ron doesn't know the words.

"You find more knives than not knife in his pants."

The fact that Lark was smuggling knives for a breakout attempt is just so lovely, go off my murderous little weirdo.

Also seeing Henry taking weapons from his kids knowing where this ends up is just (collapses into a ball of sad)

Henry deflecting from the werewolf questions by just switching to the topic of puberty, only for Sparrow to be too receptive to wanting to learn.

Darryl overhearing Paeden saying that Grant's dad is cool only for Grant to not say anything in response.

"Did Ron kill his dad?"

Seeing Darryl be actually upset about the fact that he's the only one who'd want to see his dad, but his dad's not there. And seeing Darryl actually grapple with the idea that he doesn't understand Glenn, Henry, and Ron's relationships with their dads, and like the weird feeling of not being able to relate being isolating, but still realizing it's an isolation you should be thankful for.

Ghost football ft. George Washington and one of his slaves

"Dude, that was the entire snarling id of the American masculine psyche in one image…It was like football, George Washington, your dad, and the Sword of Damocles that is slavery."

Glenn in the dream space

Bill Close calling Glenn tiger is just like such a small detail but it's like one of those moments that we really can actually see him being a dad, I think?

The gut punch of "Do you love me?" and "You wake up." like God DAMN!!!!!

Like this episode is such a buffet of character dynamics, and jokes, and lore, and room for theories, and I LOVE IT SO MUCH!!!! WHY DID IT TAKE ME SO LONG TO REALIZE IT'S MY FAVORITE????????

[violivs]

NMTDaily: And So It Begins

- Beatrice’s first vlog! What an opening line, I love it lol. I remembered the hand wave on “hello, people of the Internet” having a wider arc across the screen than it actually does, funny enough! Glad I didn’t specify the wide wave when I referenced this line in MARRIED, the fic I posted on the 25th.

- “I’m not too old for Halloween”, girl after my own heart!

- Always thought it was interesting that Bea’s mother is American. I wonder how/why they decided that. It’s the kind of super specific detail that makes Bea feel so real, because who would make that up? It’s also interesting that it means Bea and Ben’s families are both somewhat international. Another parallel for them, another thing they have in common.

- I bet the Aunties’ wedding was the cutest thing ever, imagine Hero and Leo standing up with them! That’s probably the last time all of the Dukes were together before the story starts.

- I’m surprised Bea’s parents moved because her dad got a promotion. I would have assumed her mom did, because we get the impression of her as the high-powered businesswoman. But good for Bea’s dad. Is it canon that he’s a university professor? (Promotion = tenure?) Or did I make that up for fanfic and/or confuse him with Ben’s parents being professors in canon? Listening for that. Maybe Bea’s dad was actually also a business person all along and that’s how her parents met. Who knows.

- Bea says Australia like I say Indiana, lol (no hate to anyone from Indiana though! Just another of those inborn rivalries with the neighbor, like the Oz/NZ one.)

- “A great science program” I forgot Bea was a science person!

- I always loved the set decoration in this room, I remember it’s Hero’s room, and it’s so artsy and cozy and pretty. Love the wall art.

- “Leo and I are in charge of the house for the next six months” Excuse me, does this series really only take place over six months? Well, it ends in the first week of November, so that’s seven full months. I think it felt like it lasted a whole year when it was airing though. Time slowed down during a certain arc for sure.

- “in-joke with myself!” Classic. I kind of love that the text on screen saying “good one Beatrice” is Bea talking to herself again in-world, but out-of-world it’s kind of the Candle Wasters talking, interacting both with their own main character and with the audience. Meta.

- “Sorry my life is so boring” are like, THE famous last words for an LIW protagonist. Honey, you got a big storm coming!

- I was always so incredibly impressed with Beatrice’s independence, her comfort with leaving her parents and essentially being on her own before she even finished high school. I was alone in a college dorm hours away from home when I first watched this, second semester of freshman year if I’m not mistaken, and I could barely believe I’d managed it. I couldn’t imagine doing that any earlier than I had. I thought she was so brave and cool. I think Bea actually shows more hesitation and nervousness than I realized she did in this episode, both because she’s not used to vlogging yet and because being in a new place is nerve-wracking, but I still think she’s so brave.

- It’s so interesting that in a reversal of the play, it’s our Beatrice who comes from away to Messina to start the story, instead of Benedick and the other men returning from war. Of course, we’ll see how the boys’ arrival on the scene is modernized soon enough!

- Harriett does such a great job making you care about Bea and like her right from the start. You just want to keep listening to her talk. I can’t wait to do just that over the next seven months.

- The Benedict Cumberbatch crush is a stroke of genius, but what are the odds that there happens to be a super famous guy named Benedict that you can reference who is at peak relevance in the exact year your MAAN modernization premieres? Truly, this series as it exists could only have happened in 2014. It was the perfect time and the perfect people. What luck.

- Oh, this is the wider arc hand wave I was remembering! It’s just at the end of the video and not the beginning. Funny!

- Covering the camera with her hand and ducking out of frame at the end of her first video is a direct parallel to what Bea and Hero do in their final NMTD video, sliding out of frame and all. Love that.

- I can’t believe how much there is to talk about even with these early episodes. These posts are gonna get so long they’ll have to go under a cut for the later episodes!

💖🦩🥭

[sanssouci-sims]

Those of you who have been to my main blog in the past year or so might recognize these familiar faces. The little girl is Karin Fjellvik, a character from the game “My Child Lebensborn” (I call it “MCL” for short), and the woman is Karita Omdahl, my MCL fan character/self-insert and Karin’s adoptive mother. I’ve made a few posts about them both on my main blog as well as my sideblog which specifically focuses on my OC x canon relationships, so take a gander if you’d like to read more about them! 

I’ll probably mention a bit of the game as I talk about them in this post, so minor spoilers ahead!! Also, fair warning if you do decide to check out the actual game for yourself: it’s based on real historical events (specifically having to do with the end of World War 2) and involves prejudice/racism and violence towards a child (among other things). Needless to say, it’s quite emotional, and let’s just say that by the end of my play-through, I wanted to punt quite a few people into the shadow realm because of what they did to my poor daughter. 😭

While MCL was originally set during the aftermath of World War 2, I imagine my sims counterparts live in the modern day. Funnily enough, the developers of MCL are currently working on a sequel which will take place in a more modern setting! I would think the sims versions of Karin and Karita moved to this new place in Willow Creek after they’d gone through similar events that happened in the original game. All they wanted to do was to just... get away from their old town, from Karin’s old school, from everything their cruel neighbors had done to them.

Karin and Karita would start their new lives in this modest but pretty one-story home with a small outdoor area for the two to sit and for Karin to play. In the game, you happen to make contact with Karin (or her male counterpart Klaus)’s biological father, who wires you money to help you move out of town. I imagine Karita used much of that money to pay off this new house. They started with only $200 in simoleons, which was a nod to how you would start off with 200 coins (? - dollars? Or whatever they used in Norway during that time? I don’t think the game actually specified what that actual currency was lmao) in the original game.

As money is tight in their household, Karita knows they’ll need it only for the most important items, and she’s made sure Karin knows that. There are times where Karin wishes she had the newest toys or clothes like the other kids have, and she’ll get upset when she can’t have them. Karita promises she’ll buy them one day for her, just not today. After all, it’s better to be selfless than selfish. Karin recently received a whole mini art studio set for her birthday, and she LOVES it! She plans to create lots of artwork to display in her room, and she even uses it occasionally in the middle of the night when she can’t sleep. She even says she hopes to help her mother earn money by selling her best artwork. 🥰

On certain days of the week, Karita works as a manual laborer as a way to bring in some stable income (I thought this was the closest to some kind of factory work, which is your/the parent’s job in MCL). The catch to this, though, is that she currently works during the weekend, which means Karin is left at home alone in the morning. :( Karita knows how much her daughter hates being by herself, so once she returns home from work, she makes sure they spend plenty of quality of time together. Their favorite activities include fishing (they can catch something to eat or Karin asks to keep one as a little pet), reading books, drawing pictures, cooking, and watching television.

See the little fish next to the television? Karin caught it and wanted to save it from being eaten!

Other than Karin’s idea to sell some of her artwork in the future, the two also already have creative ways to earn extra money on the side (or when they really need money fast). For one, Karita happens to enjoy gardening and has made a habit of exploring her neighborhood and harvesting wild plants to grow around their home. She may keep some to use as fresh ingredients/food, but most of the time, she’ll sell them when they’re fully grown.

Being experienced in manual labor, Karita isn’t afraid to get her hands dirty by digging for things as well. She’ll sell the majority of her finds along with things she catches through fishing.

Karin is also a keen explorer and likes to look for frogs. She’ll keep them as pets, too, but once she catches a new one, she knows she’ll have to sell the old one since multiple frogs is... kind of a lot to deal with in such a small home, lol.

This is her latest find, a spotted leaf frog!

So that’s basically how a typical day would go for Karin and Karita! Karin goes to school during the week, of course, and since Karita doesn’t work on weekdays, she’ll usually spend those days building her skills and doing the many things she’s already come up with to earn extra money.

Currently, Karita is hoping to save up for some renovations, including expanding the interior of their home so she will able to build a little writing studio! She wishes to write about her and Karin’s experiences and to send a message to the world to be kind to each other - something among those lines.

I like playing wholesome families like this, and I think the added challenge of reduced funds not only ties into the original game where the characters came from, but it also makes playing this household a lot more fun and interesting.

Oh, I forgot to mention, guess who came by their household while I was taking screenshots of them for this post?

a wild rose appears lmao

also i just realized you can spy one of dina caliente’s sons in the background

[ectonurites]

No hate meant towards him at all, but ngl I really kinda didn’t think Tim and Bernard would make it this far as a couple or like, last this long? I’m not even sure Meghan Fitzmartin thought they would, because I remember an interview or something where she was asked why she chose Bernard and rather than it being something about his character or relationship with Tim, she said it was because he was from the time period in comics she wanted to evoke, iirc. Do you have any thoughts on that?

Ah yes, so first of all I do know exactly which interview you're talking about, I had gone and transcribed the section you're referencing myself a while back! I'm not gonna copy & paste all of that, but here is a link to the post where I did it so you can see her exact phrasing.

One thing I do want to note is that Bernard's relationship to Tim was at least kind of part of her reasoning—specifically that Bernard was a friend of Tim's who existed outside of the hero life: "[...] it really was important for it to be like, ya know, not in a superhero space but like in a- in a very Tim personal space. Like, this is who Tim Drake is and this is a person who knows Tim Drake."

Also, funnily enough your paraphrasing ("because he was from the time period in comics she wanted to evoke") actually kind of... sounds more like it's based on a line in the commentary I made where I was explaining how I interpreted what she said ("A seemingly big factor in why Bernard was chosen was to evoke feelings of that specific time") rather than her actual words ("I, um, I really sort of wanted to get back to that particular emotional space for Tim.") Maybe we just make similar word choices though lmao.

But anyways: I did specifically link the version of that post where I had made that additional commentary talking through my thoughts on the reasoning behind picking Bernard—tldr being that imo the story of Sum of Our Parts was about 'Tim figuring out his identity' above 'Tim finding the ultimate romance', so picking Bernard as a supporting character from Tim's old solo run to solidify and support the theme [rather than an extensive history with Tim being the deciding factor] made plenty of sense for the story being told and worked effectively.

Now, that post was written in 2021 so obviously things are in a different place now—but I do say something there that I wanna bring up, because I think it captures what my opinion on the future of the relationship had been back when it was new:

"From here on they could either further develop the relationship to be something with a lot of romance, or maybe Bernard just serves his purpose as the guy Tim realizes he likes guys with and they part ways to go on to date other people, either thing could work and make sense depending on what stories future writers (either Fitzmartin if she gets to continue with Tim after Urban Legends #10, or anyone else who picks him up for content focused on him in the future) are trying to tell."

I was always in a 'this could go several different ways' camp! Kept an open mind, lmao. And I do think that like, from the ending point of Sum of Our Parts, that was probably the intent—while having one bit to continue the story in Urban Legends #10 was obviously secured by the time of publication for #6, the vague end note of #10 (which just states the fact that Tim would get content in 2022, not specifying what) definitely implies that beyond that/at that point in time things were less certain about his upcoming direction. Having things end in an open enough way where if Meghan didn't get to continue with Tim there would be a complete story, but that if things did get to continue with her she'd have a plan/path to go down, yk?

And I think it's clear now that they did end up going down the 'further developing it' path since Meghan stayed on as Tim's writer for a while (between Tim Drake: Robin and Dark Crisis: Young Justice). And frankly, despite the reasoning behind Bernard being chosen seeming more theme-related than anything else, I think it's also clear Meghan just had a fondness for him/that timeframe he came from, hence why she took the opportunity to explore things further with them when she was given it. Like, idk maybe this is just based on Vibes™ but I feel like Meghan's intent was always to keep going with the Tim/Bernard thing as long as she was the one writing Tim.

I do feel like if anyone else had ended up as Tim's primary writer after the Urban Legends story, things may have turned out differently and the relationship may not have lasted the way it has—but it's hard to truly say since that's not what happened.

Now that she's not currently slated for anything upcoming with Tim (at least not that I'm aware of, frankly Tim doesn't have much coming up at all aside from a general 'he'll likely be showing up in some capacity in batbooks' sentiment) I think the future of the two of them is a bit less steady. Not that I think they're immediately doomed or anything, but just that next time Tim gets solo content it could easily be from someone who doesn't want to deal with a civilian boyfriend element, who knows. But now that they actually do have some content under their belt in Tim Drake: Robin, it could be something someone else wants to pick up and explore even more, too. It's simply... hard to say!

But basically: I definitely understand being surprised they've lasted this long, because a part of me is surprised about that too/didn't expect it to last this long—but another part of me is less surprised based on some factors of the situation (namely just: who has been doing the majority of writing of Tim).

[deafarcher]

ooc: rules

After reading these rules, please visit the verses page for a summary of Clint’s world (see the other muses' blogs for their verses, but theirs are generally the same as Clint's)

Natasha: https://avengersoul.tumblr.com

Coulson: https://shieldagentcoulson.tumblr.com

Bobbi: https://mxckingbxrd.tumblr.com

***ALL RULES SUBJECT TO EXCEPTIONS ON A CASE BY CASE BASIS***

***Last Updated: august 22, 2024***

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[zenodreemurr]

Hello, it's me again, the one who asked for alpha x celerity, tbh I now remembered that you as Zeno in the story is 9 years old while story shift is 16 years old... I hope you give an explanation about this ship and how it's not illegal...

Welcome back. So, the answer to this question will be very different from the lats one, since it is a different case of a ship. However, since your wording worries me a bit, I need to specify one thing. Zeno is not a self-insert of mine. It has never been the case and I would have never thought of someone thinking this. It happened so many times that I feel like I need to clear it up publicly, and you give me a good occasion to do it. To make the story short, I made Zeno back during the very end of 2017. I chose this username on November 24, 2018 because I had no idea for a good username, and just decided to keep it. Now that this is clear, let's get back to the original wonder. I know exactly what you're talking about, but you need to know one thing... I've made my own research on Storyshift Chara's age, and the only place I found the information of them being 16 years old is the old Undertale AU Fanon Wiki (also known as 735q4e87 Wiki). This Wiki is not a valid source of information. In fact, it is even made to add non-canonical information (among other things I will not talk about). The new Undertale AU Fanon Wiki legit copypasted the article from the actual Storyshift Wiki, where no age has been specified. I haven't made too much research on Voltra's or the Storyshift tumblr. Anyways, according to my research, Storyshift Chara could be younger or older than that (honestly, I'd say older, but that's just my opinion). Back in the day this "ship" was made, I didn't care about many things. Age was definitely one of the things I didn't care about (especially with a character such a Storyshift Chara with an unlikely specific age). However, to be honest, it was supposed to be friendship. Unfortunately, the images were pretty confusing. It was a bit intentional, so I'll take my fault. However, I personally regret making this. It definitely was a mistake in many ways, and the only reason I'm even responding is because I feel like you shouldn't be left without an answer. So feel free to think whatever you want about this case. But let me clarify something... I've seen far worse Zeno ships out there, some you may not want to know. I've heard of people making those, so believe me when I say it's not the worst. I won't tell any precise ship, and I'm not even sure of the people that made them. For the one you specified though, I know you've seen in on one of my accounts. Back in the day, I was publishing all fan-arts made by people without permission, a bit because people refused to do it by themselves. I hate to have done that and have grown out of doing it. One of my recent posts may prove otherwise, but it was published with permission, and because the artist told me they didn't have any place to publish it only. Now that this is cleared up, I think this isn't the answer you would have imagined, but this is all I can say. Have a good day.

[sirowsky]

Christmas Special

A standalone Pero Tovar story, because I'm feeling down and he's my comfort character. I missed my family's Christmas celebration this weekend, the only time in December that everyone was available, and now this year's Christmas spirit has kind of died, for me. So, this is completely self-indulgent romantic crap that somehow isn't sappy. I don't know what happened, it was supposed to be. Anyway - Enjoy!

(I'm copying the DMT taglist for this, cause I love you guys!)

Description: You and Pero both work in the same office, and he's an enigma to absolutely everyone, including you. But when you're having your worst day of the year, he's oddly enough the one that gets you through it.

Rating: Mature 18+ONLY Warnings: Christmas themes, cursing, angst, loneliness, family dispute. Modern!pero, pero tovar x female reader. No use of y/n. Dual perspectives. Word Count: 8060

The Correct Part 2 (the original and horrible Part 2)

Author’s Masterlist

You hated office parties, and Christmas parties most of all, for two primary reasons. Firstly, because you hated spending the holidays without your family. You’d grown up in a small town in a poor family, where good food and loving company was what that day had come to mean to you. Secondly, because office nerds that spent the entire year cooped up in little booths all day, tended to go apeshit crazy whenever they were handed free booze. Now that might only be true of these particular office nerds, but the last four years could attest to it. Regardless, you did not in any conceivable way look forward to the event and had planned no to attend at all. But, as seemed to be your lot in life, everything you didn’t want to do, ended up being crammed down your throat anyway.

And this festive season was no exception, because of course your boss had decided that you would be receiving a special commendation on that very night, effectively forcing you to be there. You’d let out a string of curses that would’ve made your nanna cringe, had she been alive to hear it, when you’d left your boss’s office after she’d told you. You just wanted to sit at home in your pyjamas and eat pizza and watch sappy Christmas movies so you could get a good fucking cry out of your system at the reminder of just how damn lonely you were, and then fall asleep hugging every pillow you owned. Was that too much to ask for a single woman on Christmas Day?? Apparently so!

******

Pero Tovar wasn’t the happiest of men. He didn’t know specifically why that was, beyond the fact that he disliked most every other human being that crossed his path, and that usually his co-workers managed to top that list. He’d had a good career in the military, but black ops weren’t something one did into old age, and it wasn’t exactly something he could put on his resumé. In fact, none of the work he’d done for the military could be specified on anything, ever. Which meant that finding work was… tricky. He’d mostly worked in private security in the five years since he’d left his previous life, but that often meant baby-sitting rich assholes, which he neither had the patience or delicacy of tongue for. Whenever he did speak, which he avoided as much as possible, he wasn’t one to mince words, and it had gotten him fired about half a dozen times by now. Rich assholes were also sensitive assholes, it seemed. So, he’d decided to try to do something different, which was why he was now staring at a surveillance feed of an office, five floors above his head, where technicians were working on developing new software for… something. They had to be monitored at all times, to ensure that no one attempted to copy or steal any data, even though there were other security measures in place for that. Pero considered it a waste of time to try and protect numbers in computers, but no matter how tedious he might find the work, he was not one to shrug off his duties. He’d do the job, no matter how boring, if a contract had been signed. Just as long as no one asked or expected him to smile or be polite while doing so. With fifteen minutes left on his shift, his replacement showed up. They all rotated positions within the building, taking turns to stand guard at the main and secondary entrance, patrol the floors, screen visitors and occasionally escort an analyst or technician to the company headquarters on the other side of the city, when sensitive data was involved. For some reason that was the one task that the other ten guards working there, hated the most. But for Pero it was the exact opposite. He liked getting out of the office and spending a few hours in a quiet car with just a driver and a techie to worry about. Especially now, when he’d been there over six months and everyone had learned that he did not engage in small-talk, and generally let him be. Well, almost everyone.

“Hey, Tovar! What’s cookin’?”

Ben Tyler was one of those people that just hated when it got too quiet and would fill the silence with their own voice if no one else did. The man would whistle and sing, play air-guitar and use his own thighs as drums, just to not have to endure one minute of total silence, and in the beginning it had nearly driven Pero to rip out his colleague’s tongue. But to his own surprise, Tyler had grown on him. Simply because as much as he talked and made noise, it had never once bothered him that Pero didn’t respond, and now that they’d worked together for a time, the kid didn’t seem to expect him to, either. He seemed perfectly fine with carrying on a completely one-sided conversation all day long. And he somehow managed to still do a good job, something that Pero always respected.

“All good.”

It was as much of a response as he ever gave when there was nothing to report, and the kid just smiled and took a seat next to him.

“Hey, you’re coming right? To the x-mas thing!”

Pero just gave him a steely look in return. Tyler knew more than well that he never attended anything that wasn’t contractually forced upon him.

“Aw, come on, man! It’s the one time we get to just hang with everybody else, and be regular people, not ‘those security guys’ that no one ever speaks to.”

He just kept staring at the kid.

“Yeah, yeah, I know – you prefer it that way, but has it ever crossed your mind that maybe I’d like to have a friend there?”

That made him lower his eyebrows in confusion.

“So, bring a friend.”

The kid huffed at him with a somewhat annoyed smile in his face.

“I’m trying to, dim-wit. You’re my friend.”

His eyebrows climbed back up again at that. If Tyler considered the likes of him a friend, then he must not have anyone else. But that wasn’t Pero’s problem. He got up to leave, and the kid turned his swivelling chair to follow his movements.

“An hour? Half an hour? Please…”

He sighed, and turned back, while he opened the door.

“Sorry.”

*****

The thingwas always held between the 20th and the 24th and this year it was going to take place on December the 23rd, a regular Tuesday to most people. You wanted to be most people. That date seemed to come flying at you the more you dreaded it, and suddenly it was Monday, and you hadn’t prepared. You had no dress, no shoes, no fucking speech… Why did you have to give a speech? Wasn’t it enough torture to just make you stand in a spotlight while a stupid plaque was handed to you? As had been your method for the past three weeks, and the reason why you weren’t at all prepared, you refused to think about it and just worked. Your fingers were quick and sure on the keys, and you felt confident when you wrote code. It almost made you forget the stressful crap you’d be forced to deal with tomorrow. You could get completely lost in the virtual world that in some ways made so much more sense to you than reality. Not in terms of games or social media, but the actual code. You felt like there was so much in this world that was just incomprehensible but writing code you understood perfectly. It was your safe place. Which was why you were terribly disappointed when your assistant came to tap you on the shoulder, disrupting your flow.

“Hey, you’re late!”

For a moment you thought that an entire day had already passed, and that you were expected at the party right then.

“The transfer ring any bells?”

“Oh, shit…”

It did. You were scheduled to take important datasets to HQ that day, and while you had prepared the data, you hadn’t unlocked it for transfer yet, which took at least ten minutes, meaning the schedule was going to be interrupted as you only had five minutes until the car was supposed to exit the garage. And that meant calling down to security to make them change the schedule, which they hated doing, especially with short notice. But there was no other way, so you picked up the phone.

“Sec-desk, Gaby speaking.”

“Hey, Gaby, it’s me. Listen I’m so sorry, but I forgot to unlock the transfer, can you push the schedule 10 minutes?”

“Oh, Genie… you just had to, didn’t you?”

“Don’t tell me it’s Tovar’s rotation? I can’t be that unlucky!”

“I’m afraid you are. So, you know… run.”

“Fuck!”

Of all the guards, Pero Tovar was the one guy no one wanted to screw with. He was the newest hire, but even in his first week he’d already made everyone else move out of his way when they met him. They hadn’t even dared to try and prank him, which was the usual rite of passage for new employees. He wasn’t mean exactly, he was just… unreadable. Unaffected by anything and everything. Nobody knew of a single thing he liked, or what he did in his spare time, or even where he lived. But you all knew what he disliked. And anything that jeopardised his ability to fulfil his duties, was met by a scowl so deep that it made him look freaking deadly. He was broad as a doorway and tall enough to tower over most people, and his hands were huge and calloused, and you were mostly convinced that he really could and would kill people, if need be. So, you ran. You couldn’t do anything about the elevator, but you ran every other bit of the way to get to the sub-basement and the servers, where Mr. Tovar himself waited by the door. Security always accompanied you inside, to make sure that everything was done in accordance with all established procedures, and you literally shivered at the thought of being alone in a small space with this man right now. He was not happy, and you didn’t need that on top of your already peaking stress-levels.

“I know, I’m late, and I’m sorry.”

It was somehow so much worse that he never responded. In the six months that he’d been there, you’d never heard him say a single word. Not that it was needed, really, when he was so adept at showing his malcontent in expressions alone. There was a step-by-step procedure that had to be followed to the letter in order to unlock a dataset, and it was a process that simply couldn’t be rushed, no matter how much you cursed at the system in your head. But once you were in the armoured Mercedes sedan, almost exactly seven minutes late, there was nothing else to do for the ninety-minute drive, and that was even worse. He sat next to you in the backseat, rather than in the front passenger seat, like all the other guards did, for reasons you had no clue about. And his eyes continually scanned the surroundings, which meant that he regularly turned his head towards you, but not to speak to you or even acknowledge your presence, which made you feel awkward. You could always speak to the driver, but with where your head was at that day, you couldn’t think of anything to talk about, other than the damn party, and you were not in the mood to talk about that. When you got there, safe and sound as always, the silent wall of a man had to accompany you inside, and even though he’d only set foot in HQ four times prior to that occasion, even the people there knew to step aside when he approached. The transfer consisted of just literally handing the datasets over to another techie, made slightly trickier by the fact that they were in a bulletproof briefcase handcuffed to your wrist, to which only the receiving technician and their security guard, had the correct key. But it went smoothly, and within ten minutes you were back in the car and looking forward to another ninety minutes of awkward silence before you’d finally be free to return to your coding. When you eventually got back, Tovar was meant only to escort you to the elevator, but he broke protocol by stepping inside with you. He pressed the button for the seventh floor, for you, but none for himself, despite not being scheduled for office patrol that afternoon. The transfer guard always returned to the main security desk after the ride-along was complete.

“Uhm… something you need on my floor?”

Why did you expect him to answer? Whatever he was going up there for, it was highly probable that it was none of your business, so why would he indulge your curiosity? Unless he was going up there to complain about your tardiness to your nearest superior, and that thought just brought you down so far that you wanted to fall through the floor.

“Listen, I’m sorry about being late, it wasn’t intentional. I’m having a really crappy day, alright, and tomorrow’s gonna be even worse, so could you just cut me a break this time?”

He turned to actually look at you for once. At you, not past or through you, and you found yourself fighting the urge to take a step away from him. But you felt small and fragile and your response to that was always to try and stand taller, so you refused to turn your eyes away, as you always had the few times he’d looked at you before, just because of the frightening intensity in his dark orbs. However, now that you really met his eyes for the first time, you found an unexpected amount of emotion in there, and suddenly he seemed less of a brute and more like a bear. Tough and stronger than most when needed, but perhaps somewhat cuddly in between, if the circumstances allowed. Or maybe you were just seeing what you wanted to see. Wait, what? Why would you want to see that? The ding just before the doors rolled open startled you, and you turned your head back towards them, staring out onto your floor, but finding yourself hesitant to enter. He hadn’t moved, and it made you uncertain. You stood there, waiting to see what he’d do before you dared to move, which was just stupid, because even if he was going to complain about you, there was fuck all you could about it. But then the doors began to close again, and he reached forwards to hold them open.

“You seem distracted. Just wanted to make sure you wouldn’t accidentally go to the roof and fall off.”

You merely gaped at him for a few seconds. He spoke. Two whole sentences, no less. How did you not know that he was Spanish? And that voice, holy crap! And… was he really saying that he was concerned about you? No. He was a security guard, it was quite literally his job to keep you safe. Although, that didn’t ordinarily mean breaking protocol just to see you safely to your floor.

“Oh… that’s…… that.”

What? The hell kind of answer was that?

“Uh, I mean, tempting.”

Did you just say…?

“THOUGHTFUL! I meant to say thoughtful, that’s very thoughtful of you, thank you so much and good day.”

Suddenly you couldn’t leave the damn elevator fast enough, and you could’ve sworn you heard him chuckle under his breath right after you darted away, which was impossible because everyone knew that Tovar was incapable of laughing. It had to be one of the analysts in the cubicles closest to the elevator, that might’ve overheard your exchange. Had you bothered to go back and check, though, instead of charging through the floor to your office, you’d have seen that they both wore headphones at the time.

*****

The entire office closed over the holidays, starting on the 23rd, and wouldn’t open again until January, so that morning, Pero slept in and had a lazy morning to start off his vacation. He didn’t normally do much on his days off since he wasn’t a man of many interests, but he did like to read. Thrillers and crime-novels mostly, but also good drama, and by good he meant engaging. Not just romance and intrigue but struggles and hardships and that kind of stuff. He liked reading about people who overcame adversity, which was why his rather impressive collection included more than one autobiography as well. Currently, he was working on an old Tom Clancy book that he’d enjoyed as a younger man and was revisiting for the first time since then. He didn’t enjoy it quite as much now, when he had personal experience to compare with, but it was still a good story. The one-bedroom apartment where he lived was relatively large and could probably be made really cosy by someone better at decorating than him. All he had there was a small kitchen table and chairs, a couch with a coffee-table, two giant bookcases and a bed. The closets came with the apartment. There were no cushions or blankets, pictures or paintings, or even curtains anywhere and the few lamps he owned were simple and practical. He had no personal items at all beyond his clothes and books, not even a tv. He did have a cell phone so his employer could reach him, but he would’ve preferred not to have one. Particularly that morning, when it suddenly decided to ring. The office were the only people that had the number, so he knew that it was someone from there calling, and he seriously contemplated just ignoring it. Because the only thing happening at the office that day was the party, which he refused to attend. Still. Something might’ve happened.

“Hello?”

“Mr. Tovar, this is Gregory Peck.”

That was his supervisor, and it was never a good sign when he called.

“Yes?”

”Uh, well, I’m afraid I’m gonna have to order you back in tonight.”

Exactly as he’d expected.

“I’m on vacation.”

“You’ll be well compensated for your troubles, but this really isn’t a request. We’ve received a threat concerning the event, and it’s credible enough that we feel the need to have a full security detail in place.”

That made him shift gears immediately. It was one thing to be called in for regular work, but a threat to the innocent office workers that he and the rest of the building’s security force were specifically charged with protecting, was something else entirely.

“Any details?”

“You’ll be briefed upon arrival. I’ll need you here at 17:00 hours.”

“Yes, sir.”

*****

You were still unprepared, even as you stood in the elevator on your way to the penthouse of the office, which was basically just an empty venue that could be turned into anything from conference rooms to a gaming hub to a nightclub. All it took was the right equipment. Even though the dress and the make-up were on, and some kind of speech was jotted down on a post-it note that now sat at the bottom of your clutch purse, you felt like everything was somehow unfinished. This wasn’t your thing, it really wasn’t. You might be considered a bit of a hotshot within the company, but at heart you were a person that moved best in shadows and was quite happy with that. Fame and glory weren’t things you’d ever craved, and you never would. You weren’t opposed to the odd party, but this was a fucking Ball, and that came with certain expectations. Everyone was meant to dress and act in certain ways, and you just didn’t know the rules, no one had ever taught you about etiquette. Which would be fine if you could hide in your precious shadows, but that wasn’t gonna work tonight. The entirety of the senior staff would be there, so screwing up wasn’t an option. Especially since you were their best senior technician, meaning they held you as a standard for all the junior techies and analysts, something you were normally okay with, but not when it came to situations like these. What you wouldn’t give to get to hold a presentation to two thousand people about how to write encrypted programming, or something, instead. But you were too damn honest to call in sick, and you had too much respect for your boss to disappoint her by just ducking out. So, you checked yourself in the elevator mirror one last time. Red wasn’t your colour, so you’d opted for a white dress with embroidered snowflakes in gold, over the body and lower skirt of the full-length gown. The cut was simple and classic, but still showed off more cleavage than you’d ever wear ordinarily. It was flattering to your figure, but you still knew that you were really gonna hate it by the end of the night, just because of how unaccustomed you were to wear that sort of thing. You hadn’t had the foresight of ordering a cab, so you’d driven yourself there and just hoped that you wouldn’t feel the need to dip into the eggnog. You took off your coat and slung it over your arm just as the doors opened, and what you had to admit was an impressive décor, met your eyes. There were five giant and fully decked out trees, crystal snowflakes and stars hanging from the ceiling, an entire set of Santa’s reindeer, fake of course, but complete with sleigh and Father Christmas himself. In any other setting, you would’ve liked it, but because you knew that you weren’t gonna enjoy this evening, the magic just wasn’t there. It was already too loud and too crowded, even though you’d only just set foot on the floor. You gave your coat to a guy by a tent that stood in as a closet, and he hung it up for you, handing you a keychain with a number on it in return, so that you’d get the correct one back later. Then Alice, your boss, spotted you, and the circus began. As you’d expected, the little ceremony for your commendation was awkward and even though you did your best to smile and try and be appreciative, you were sure that everyone could see how much you hated being there. And of course, you forgot the note in your purse and didn’t wanna start digging for it while you stood there on the stage, so you just fumbled out some mediocre thanks and tried to hurry off the stage. But since the other three people up there with you were closer to the one little staircase, you had to wait until last. So, when you finally got to it, of course you had to misjudge the first step, in your exaggerated hurry, and fall on your face. Or rather, you would have, if Tovar hadn’t appeared out of the blue and caught you as gracefully as if he was just dancing with you, sweeping you off to the side and setting you down on your feet ever so softly. He was the last person you

would’ve expected to even see there, much less save your ass.

“Oh… Thank you.”

True to form, he said nothing, and only briefly glanced at you while he offered a short nod, before his eyes went to roam the crowd, and he slowly walked away. He was wearing an ordinary suit rather than his uniform, but you knew that look. He was definitely there on the clock, not to party, although you were fairly certain that the man didn’t even know how to party. Which was a shame, really, because he was seriously attractive. That is, if he’d ever smile. The whole broody seriousness wasn’t for you. You had meant to leave as soon as the ceremony was done, but a junior analyst asked you a work-question and you ended up having a long conversation with her. But after a while another friend of hers came up and asked her to dance, and she darted off, and suddenly you remembered where you were. And how alone you were. You’d had friends at the office before, but one had moved away and the other had left the company to go into the family business instead, and by then you’d already become senior technician. Which, for some reason, seemed to make you very intimidating to everyone else. Or maybe that was down to your reputation. You’d earned your nickname, Genius or Genie, by constantly coming up with solutions that no one else managed, and writing clever programs, some of which were in use in various types of equipment worldwide. Everyone expected you to rise through the ranks like a shooting star, but you were happy where you were, just writing and creating and challenging yourself and your coding- and programming skills. Which was why you’d already turned down further advancement. You were just another techie, and you wished that they could see that and feel comfortable talking to you, like they did with each other. You sat there in a corner, watching the room and wondering if this was what your entire life was always gonna be.

*****

“Look, I’m glad nothing happened, but I’m just saying it would’ve felt less like a waste of time if it had. I couldn’t even try the eggnog! And I’ve been dying for an opportunity to cosy up to Marie, you know, the Costa Rican girl on the second floor? Have you seen her desk, man? It’s like filled with Star Wars stuff, and she knows like all the lore and stuff, and I’ve been trying to send her hints, you know, but I don’t think she gets it. She was here tonight, and not one guy asked her to dance, which means I could’ve had my moment! Damn threats and shit, ruining everything…”

Pero stopped listening somewhere around ‘look’, knowing full well that Tyler was just gonna keep going whether he participated or not. The Ball was over and only the last few stragglers were still there, but as long as they were, security had to stay too. It wasn’t required for both of them to stay when there were less than ten people in the venue, but Tyler obviously wasn’t tired and in no mood to go home yet, even though Pero was technically the only one that needed to be there still. The kid followed him around and assisted, as he helped some severely intoxicated people into the elevator, hoping they’d be able to get themselves home, and preferably without leaving any bodily fluids about the building. Not that he’d have to clean it, but the cleaners shouldn’t have to, either. There were still three people sitting on the stage, playing some card game and apparently having a lot of fun, not looking like they were in any hurry to leave yet, when Pero spotted someone outside on the balcony. There were thin silk curtains covering the full-length glass doors, and it was the draft of the just barely open doors making them sway that caught his attention, or he might not have noticed it. He turned to Tyler, interrupting something about swans.

“Stay here.”

Without waiting for a reply, knowing the kid would do what he said, he went to the doors, pulling them open and stepping outside onto the large balcony, to find you. You had no coat on, and just stood there staring out over the city, even though you were shivering. He was about to tell you to come inside, when he heard you snivel. He’d never before seen you allow yourself to be emotional like that. Even when you were unsure or uncomfortable, like with the speech earlier, you always soldiered on, refusing to be broken down or bested, even by yourself. That was why he’d been so surprised when you’d fumbled over your own words the other day. You had a reputation for being hard-working, honest, generous with expletives and more or less unstoppable where your work was concerned. As far as he knew, no one had ever seen you be anything but driven and determined and very confident. But you were none of those things now. Even from behind, he could see the defeat in your shoulders, and he didn’t find that a very suitable look on you. The dress, on the other hand… He’d had to look away from you quickly after he caught you when you’d fallen off the stage, or he would’ve forgotten why he was really there. In what little time he’d been working at this office, he’d found your appearance to stick out from the rest, and in all the best ways. You dressed well, but not like most businesswomen who effectively wore suits. You kept to jeans and colourful blouses or shirts, and over the summer, you’d appeared in some fifty different dresses and skirts. All lively in some way, either in colours or with interesting cuts, but always just enough to still be tasteful, rather than tip over into ostentatious. You avoided too much make-up and kept your hair out of your face either with a simple braid or a ponytail. You were practical and unassuming, and he liked that about you. In all honesty, there were a great many things he liked about you, not that he had any clue how to tell you that. And as he shrugged off his suit-jacket and stepped closer to you, it wasn’t the dress or the make-up or the elaborate hairstyle that made him look more closely at you. You flinched just a little when the warm jacket fell over your shoulders, but you didn’t turn, probably just to try and hide your tears from him.

“What’s wrong?”

You snivelled again, and then chuckled humourlessly.

“Who cares?”

Your voice was colder than the chill in the air, but after you’d said that you let your head fall forwards as your sorrow seemed to deepen. He didn’t know what he could possibly do for you, but he wasn’t about to leave you out there. There were plexiglass shields in place above the ordinary railing, to prevent anyone from falling or jumping, and he didn’t think that that was why you were there. But you could still die of exposure, even in relatively mild temperatures.

“I realised tonight that… I don’t have anyone. No family, no friends, not even co-workers anymore. I mean, they’re still there, and I still work with them, but we’re not… close. They won’t let me get to know them, no matter how much I try. Am I that terrible to be around?”

He wanted to object, but his skills in conversation were limited and he worried that he’d say something you might misinterpret. It made no difference, though, because you didn’t give him a chance.

“Ugh, why am I pouring my heart out to you, of all people? You couldn’t care less.”

That comment stung somewhere in his chest.

“You don’t know me.”

You huffed entirely without mirth and turned to meet his eyes, and he found himself wanting so dearly to make the hurt and loneliness and pain in your face disappear. You’d never seemed to be a person with any deeper pains to speak of. Unlike him, there always seemed to be happiness within the frame of your body, even when you were annoyed. Not now, though. He couldn’t see a single trace of it and that worried him.

“We spent three hours in a car together yesterday, and you didn’t even look at me. Which is fine, you have a job to do, I get that. But you don’t say hello or goodbye, you never wish anyone a good day, you never even offer a smile. Are you telling me that that’s you caring?”

He turned his gaze to the side, looking out over the city while he tried to think. You were right, of course. No one could possibly know the things that went on inside his head when he was so used to blocking everyone out. A hazard of losing one too many brothers to violence and cruelty. And even though he really did want to look at you, all the time, he always schooled himself not to, to avoid temptation. To stop himself from favouring you above everyone else, or from starting to consider himself as having any kind of claim on you, even if it was just in the name of protecting you. Such things could so easily escalate into possessiveness, and he refused to do something like that to you. However, that also meant that all you ever saw from him was the same stoneface that everyone else did, so how could he suddenly claim to care about you with any hope of you believing him? While he kept trying to think of some way to explain, you seemed to give up, making him realise that you’d been trying to coax a reaction out of him. He couldn’t guess at what you might’ve wanted to get out of that, but he still wanted to give it to you. If only he knew what the hell it was. You sighed heavily and your shoulders fell even further. Your head was once again bowed, and he could only just see the slight glimmer of the tears that spilled down your cheeks.

“You know, I really didn’t wanna be here at all. But of course, they had to decide that this would be the perfect occasion to hand out a special commendation for my ‘excellent work’. As if that even means anything.”

Your voice was low and weak, and he got the feeling that you were continuing to speak even though you didn’t believe that he cared, simply because you needed to say this out loud. He wanted you to keep talking, no matter what you talked about, so he said the first thing that came to mind.

“You don’t think your work is excellent?”

“That’s beside the point. No one cares how many plaques or diplomas I have, it’s all just for show, it’s meaningless. But they make such a big deal out of it. Handing me a piece of wood and metal that they spent a hundred bucks on so they can pretend that it proves how good my work is. All just to entice the others to work harder so that they can get a damn plaque too. It’s all bullshit.”

He knew a little about commendations and the largely meaningless rituals that came with them, so he understood your point, but he also knew that it wasn’t what you were really upset about.

“That’s not why you’re sad.”

You lifted your head and met his eyes, letting a forced smile plant itself in your face, which together with your tear-streaked cheeks made you look even sadder somehow.

“I’m sad because it’s Christmas and I’m alone. I’m always alone, and for the most part it’s fine, I’m used to it. But these few days of the year… to me, they’re about family. About togetherness and making time for one another. About love.”

Your fake smile had faded by the time you finished, and you looked away from him again, pulling his jacket closed over your front as the shivers had started up again.

“Where is your family?”

You closed your eyes tightly, and a deep breath left through your slightly parted lips. Not in a huff or a sigh, but more like a piece of your soul had broken off and flown away.

“There was a fight. A long time ago. I wasn’t even a part of it, but… we never found our way back to each other after that. I haven’t seen them, at all, in more than eight years.”

Suddenly you seemed to decide that this entire situation was ridiculous, and quickly wiped your tears away before shrugging his jacket off to hand it back to him.

“I don’t even know why I’m still here. And I have no idea why I’m still talking to you. I’m sorry for taking up your time with my drama.”

You rattled the few sentences off quickly and stepped past him to the door, heading back inside and over to the closet-tent.

*****

Of course, your coat was gone. Why wouldn’t it be? Everything else had gone to shit. Why the hell hadn’t you gone home when you’d first meant to? And what on earth had possessed you to pour your heart out to fucking Tovar?!

“Hey, Genie! I didn’t think you were still here. Congrats on the prize, or whatever you call it.”

Ben Tyler. The happiest 22-year-old you’d ever met. Nothing ever brought him down.

“Hi. Uh, yeah, thanks. I’m leaving now, but you have a good night.”

“Sure. Are you okay?”

“I’m fine. I’ll see you after the holidays.”

You knew that he could tell that you’d cried, he was a sweet kid, but you hoped that he wouldn’t ask anything else about it. You just wanted to get home and peel off the damn dress and go to bed. The elevator was quick to arrive, and you stepped inside, suddenly grateful to be alone with your emotionally messed up self. But before the doors closed, there he was again. Seriously, was this the national ‘Being stuck with Pero Tovar’ holiday, or something? You watched him step inside, not pressing any button of his own, meaning he’d be heading for the garage too, and you scowled. Was this his idea of solving your loneliness problem? Well, that wasn’t gonna happen. And what did he care about your loneliness, anyway? You scolded yourself for being so self-centred, as it dawned on you that he was probably just leaving too, now that almost everyone had gone, and that the timing was likely just a coincidence. But when the elevator pinged as you reached the garage floor and the doors opened, he waited for you to step out before he followed, and even that was enough to set you off on him again.

“I’m not some helpless damsel, so you can stop with the chivalry, okay. I don’t need you to protect me.”

You walked down the short hall to the garage door, and then flinched when he stopped you from punching in the code that unlocked it, by taking your hand and holding it gently. And as you turned your head to find out what the heck he was up to; he was suddenly so much closer than you’d anticipated.

“I know.”

His voice had dropped, and you were abruptly aware of a very nice smell that wafted off him. Your eyes were trapped in his, that appeared to have turned into liquid brown pools, like a dark scotch or brandy. Suddenly you felt hot and sort of itchy, wondering what his hands might be good at. Not to mention his lips… and hips. Shit. You’d never even contemplated him in any romantic or erotic light, he was way too cold to make you think of him like that. Even now, when your own body was abruptly reacting to him as though he was trying to seduce you, you still had no idea if that was what he was actually doing. He was completely impossible to read. You hadn’t been around him enough to be able to properly judge his behaviour, especially since tonight was the first time you’d ever seen him outside of his professional character, and the first time you’d had a real conversation with him. Not that he’d said much, but it was still 100% more than he normally did. Closing your eyes and taking a slow breath made your mind clear, and you remembered that you weren’t a one-night-stand-person, so even if he was coming on to you, which you were by no means sure of, nothing would happen. You’d been hurt too many times to count, by thinking that guys were genuinely interested in you, only to wake up alone, and you were sick of it. God, why where you even thinking like that? He had literally just said two words to you and suddenly you were thinking about sex? What the fuck… You took another breath. To avoid meeting his intense eyes when you opened yours, you leaned your head back against the wall, and instead opened them to a familiar sight, up under the ceiling. Some joker had put a mistletoe up there, in between a lamp and a warm-air fan that kicked in automatically if cold air came flowing inside at the opening of the door. He had just let go of your hand again, when you started giggling because it was just too ridiculous. Things like this didn’t happen. There was no such thing as a God-wink, and you’d never believed in fate. But… he was incredibly hot, even if you hadn’t allowed yourself to acknowledge that before. So, why not? The entire evening had been a disaster anyway, what difference would it make if you woke up with one more regret tomorrow? You grabbed his shoulders and hugged yourself to him while pressing your lips to his, having to rise onto your toes as you’d picked flat shoes for comfort. His arms came around you and steadied you against his chest, while his lips eagerly followed your lead, and that emboldened you as you really hadn’t expected him to kiss you back at all. You opened your mouth, trailing your tongue along his upper lip, and he opened for you, letting his tongue dance with yours while his hands dropped to your hips, and your back suddenly connected to the cool wall. You moved your hands, as he pressed himself against you, letting one tangle in his hair and the other snake around his waist, tugging him closer. Damn, he felt good. The way he responded, the eager passion that he somehow managed to show without becoming demanding, was something you’d never come across in a guy before, and it made you want him. Badly. But with you, that was always a bad sign. You broke the kiss, and he pulled back, giving you your space even though he clearly wanted to continue claiming it. And now you felt stupid.

“I’m sorry, I… shit.”

He just stood there, only his hands still in contact with you, softly holding your hips, waiting while you tried again.

“I didn’t mean to start something I can’t finish… I just saw the mistletoe, and with the night I’ve had… I don’t know, I guess I just wanted to feel something good.”

He looked up and saw the plant hanging there, and then let go of you completely.

“Okay.”

It wasn’t a ‘that’s okay, I was just playing’ kind of okay. It was way more disappointed than that. He looked… hurt, and that really bothered you. Why did that bother you? You didn’t even like him…

“I don’t mean to say that I didn’t enjoy that, I did! A lot. But I have a terrible track record with men and I’m just not up for another night of being meaninglessly fucked and left. Especially not tonight.”

He seemed frozen for a few seconds, just staring at you, making you feel self-conscious and strangely exposed.

“It wouldn’t be meaningless. Not for me.”

That threw you for a loop which had your stomach churning. He couldn’t mean that. You must be misinterpreting, because why would he care?

“I’ve liked you from the start, Genie. I’m just not very good at… dating. I never have, at least not as an adult. But I’ve wanted to ask you out every time we’ve been trapped in that car together.”

Your mouth had gone dry, and something seemed to be beating the inside of your chest with a sledgehammer, making it hard to breathe. Firstly, he’d just spoken for real. For the first time he’d offered more than a short and emotionally detached reply to a question. He’d given you a real explanation and even… a declaration. And because he’d never spoken that much before, every sentence told you so much more about him. His voice was sure, but his words suggested that he expected rejection. Maybe all the time. He wasn’t shy exactly, nor insecure. But more likely damaged, just like you. With the difference that where you’d tried to use positivity and laughter and enjoyment as a way of keeping yourself grounded and sane and at least moderately happy, he’d chosen to shut the world out.

“Then why haven’t you?”

He took a moment to consider that, and you found yourself hanging on every micro-expression in his features, trying to understand more about him.

“I’m a military man. I respond to orders, commands, I don’t understand small-talk and I don’t really want to. But I also felt like I couldn’t just say ‘will you date me?’ because people don’t do that. They give… hints? And then the other person is just supposed to know, like it’s some kind of magic.”

He shrugged unhappily, and turned his gaze to the floor, shifting his weight from one foot to the other, and he suddenly looked so adorable to you. How was that possible? You didn’t even like him…

“There are a lot of things I’m not good at, as you’ve already noticed, but I can fix almost anything, and I rarely complain. I’m loyal, reliable and I try to be kind, and yes, I’m also very protective. And… I really… really like you.”

Wow. Just… wow. Suddenly there was so much to process. Too much. He was offering himself to you, highlighting his strengths so that you’d know what you were getting if you accepted. And you were pretty sure you already knew what his major weaknesses were. But, what about you? You kept telling yourself that you didn’t like him, but… damn it if he wasn’t growing on you by the second. You had to close your eyes again, to try and get that sledgehammer to ease up so that you could answer him. But you still had to clear your throat a few times before your voice came back.

“Tovar… I don’t know you. At all.”

His head came back up and his eyes sought yours again. If he was disappointed, he didn’t show it. In fact, he looked mostly mildly confused.

“And still you kissed me like that. With meaning.”

Oh, shit. He was right. Had a hurricane passed over your life in the past few minutes? It sure as hell felt like it and you were getting increasingly frustrated for a lot of reasons.

“I have no idea what I feel right now! Except-…”

Now it was his turn to hang on your every expression, even holding his breath in anticipation. But you took too long, and he got impatient enough to try and hurry your answer a little.

“What?”

And suddenly you hated the distance between you. Suddenly you wanted him to make you forget every other lover you’d ever had, every lonely night when the pain in your gut, the pain of not having a person, someone that was always there for you, had made you wanna scream.

“Except that I really want you to make me feel good. Any kind of good, even if it is just for one night. Even just an hour.”

Something soft filled his eyes at your words, and he stepped closer, putting his hands on your cheeks and you loved how warm he felt.

“All night. I promise.”

This time, he was the one that kissed you, and even though it was a shorter one, it was still full of meaning. Had he told you that he’d take you home, tell you to take a long and warm shower and then crawl under covers with you and just hold you close all night long, you wouldn’t have believed him. But that’s exactly what he did. And it was the best night of your life. Well. Up until then, at least.

---------------

Link to Part 2 (the correct one)

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[phillipakpussy]

Mexican authorities apprehended a man suspicious of the serial killing of 30 women. They raided his house and found the bones of at least 30 women. Some of them were reported as missing from back in 2018. The man is 72 years old. And his last victim was 34.

So it's all men. All of them... Even old and poor men. It's not white cis able-bodied men. It's all of them.

Neighbors have reported that he "was a quiet nice man" (as always) but younger female neighbors said they always thought he was a pervert and a creep, usually avoiding him because when drunk he used to catcall them.

Here's a link to an article. In Spanish.

I'm sick and tired of this country. I hate this horrible place where 11 women are killed on a daily basis. This is the reality of women in the global south. This is what living in a Latino country looks like.

Edit: some of you are vague posting about why did I specify race and yadda yadda. I'm gonna tell you a story.

When I first read this news article I was on Twitter. Lots of feminists were tweeting about this and explained that this why we don't let old men into the female only subway trains. Lots of moids and liberals were offended, even professors in my uni said that an all men analysis was reductionist.

So, for the sake of my mental health, iq quit Twitter and came here to post about this.

I lived for a long time in the state mentioned in the article. It is really dangerous, specifically for women. We even moved out bc of that.

So I came here, trying to get it out of my chest and I posted in English bc I know that will get more attention and specifying race bc some people here think white is the default and thinking about how many people defended old men bc they're old, and decided to emphasize he's not the American serial killer poster man you're used to see.

So now I know some of you think that If a Latina wants to specify her problems, she's racist..... OK... Think about it for a moment

[thefanficmonster]

Rumors

Corpse Husband x Bimbo!Reader (Female)

Warnings: Mentions of Slut Shaming, Swearing

Genre: Fluff, Tiniest bit of Angst, RPF (Real Person Fic)

Summary: When some rumors start floating around, every content creator does their best to either ignore them or defuse the situation. However, sometimes, the fans attempt to do the defusing themselves which only leads to a worse disaster. That’s the case for Corpse whose fans were quick to jump to his protection of some ‘false’ rumors.

Requested by Anon. Hi dear! Thank you so much for your request, it was a joy to write. I’m sorry for how long it has taken me to complete and post the fic but here it finally is and I hope you enjoy reading it at least half as much as I enjoyed writing it! Love, Vy ❤

Corpse cracks his knuckles, then his shoulders, then his collarbone, then the his neck. He clenches his jaw as he breathes steadily and rhythmically, trying to control an overwhelming wave of anger that he has never felt before. This is a situation he’s never had to deal with nor did he ever think he’d have to deal with and address on a fucking livestream on top of all, but here he is now, doing his best to count to ten and not go on a Twitter responding spree, calling people out on their bullshit. He wanted to do so, he still wants to, but he was stopped in his intentions and brought to a calm mindset where he was swayed into dealing with this the civil way and not by roasting the fuck out of any and every foul-mouthed person he’s seen on his Twitter timeline.

He can’t really guarantee and civility during the stream either, he’s aware his tolerance is as thin as a stretched out, old rubber band and is a slight tug away from snapping and allowing him to unleash hell on these people because of who he’s been seeing red these past few days. 

Let’s not risk a misunderstanding here - Corpse absolutely loves and adores his fans, but seeing this behavior from them is quite upsetting and disappointing. When he uses the terms like ‘assholes’, ‘jerks’ and ‘rude motherfuckers’ he isn’t referring to them. He knows they are good people, but are using the completely wrong tactic of defending him, not to mention he doesn’t even need defending. Even if he did, he’s more than capable of doing it on his own and not getting other people involved.

“Hello everyone, hope you’re doing well.“ He finally settles on saying, officially kicking off the stream. If there’s any indicator of the serious nature of this stream, it’s probably the lack of lo-fi and the lack of even attempted playfulness and cheeriness in his voice. That’s how you know shit isn’t to be messed around about. “I just realized I didn’t specify what I’ll be doing in the Tweet, but I’ll tell you now, so those who aren’t interested in the subject or want to steer clear of the drama can leave. However, I wouldn’t advise clicking off considering this will be an overall, how do I say this, rant, of sorts? It’s meant to knock some sense in the people who have been spreading hate for a specific person on all social media platforms she’s active on.“

The majority of the viewers are already familiar with the subject, some even guilty of spreading the hate Corpse mentioned, but there are a few that are completely clueless - the ones actually not interested in online drama, not just saying they ‘hate drama’. With those people in mind, Corpse takes to addressing the issue from its very beginning.

“So, for a month now, me and this streamer, who’s also a TikTok star, by the name of Y/N have been interacting a lot on social media. She’s an incredibly sweet girl that a lot of people have prejudice towards. She’s very misjudged and misunderstood because people see he solely as her content, if that makes sense. They only know she’s that streamer who wears revealing clothes on her streams and posts risqué pictures on her Instagram. Like, no.“ Corpse cannot even fully believe he has to address this and that slut-shaming people is still a thing in the twenty-first century. He closes his eyes for a moment, fist tightening and his knuckles turning white, “I don’t understand how so many people can be so shallow and just plain jerks towards her in general, but then again - this is especially for my fans, the members of my fandom - I don’t understand the need you guys feel to put Y/N down to defend me from some ridiculous rumors as if it’s the first time I’ve had to deal with people talking shit for attention or to get someone canceled.“ He sighs, reminding himself to slow his roll as to not confuse any viewers who still don’t know the full story, “Anyway, back to the timeline of events. So, considering we’ve never interacted before, all the replying to comments, retweeting, liking posts and whatever sparked some dating rumors. Isn’t that just fucking hilarious - you see two people interacting on social media and the first thing that comes to mind is that they’re in a romantic relationship. Where did the friendship go? Does no one value or consider friendships to be a valid type of human relation anymore?“ He runs a hand through his hair, making another pause to clear his mind and prevent his frustration from overflowing. He promised he wouldn’t lose his cool and would remain calm and collected, but the more he talks about it the tighter he clenches his fist and the faster his heartrate is. His neck and ears are red from the tension he feels all over, almost like he’s physically restraining a raging wild animal and not just his own thoughts and emotions.

There’s layers to his anger, the lower ones - aka the ones he’s yet to get to - will be a nightmarish test of his self-control, he already knows it. Judging by how much of a toll this rant has already taken on him, his patience and control growing thinner and thinner, he’s not sure how he’ll power through the last layers without his voice raising awfully high in volume and his fists searching for some object to punch. To an ignorant eye, his reaction would seem exaggerated and overboard, but little does that ignorant eye know...

“When some of my fans saw those rumors, they reacted very badly. It was quite disappointing to see. Guys, I appreciate you standing up for me even though you shouldn’t do that - I can defend myself, not that this was a matter I needed defending from to begin with. But just the way some of you went about it was horrifically wrong and quite upsetting, to me but especially to Y/N herself.“ He can feel it, the aggravation growing, bubbling up in his chest, “What I saw disgusted me, I’m not gonna sugarcoat it. The things some of you were saying...I couldn’t believe you are in fact the same people who are my fans, my lovely fans who I’ve always thought so highly of. Never did I think you could be able of slut-shaming so vulgarly and grossly, I couldn’t believe what I was reading.“

He has every right to be upset - the things being said about Y/N were truly awful and a lot of things being said were meant to defend Corpse and defuse the rumors, doing so while stomping all over Y/N and her content. Rightfully so, many of her fans were outraged and quick to jump to her defense but were unfortunately outnumbered, leading Corpse to believe not many of her fans are actually real or as dedicated as his which only fueled his fury further.

Anyway, let’s take a look at Y/N’s point of view. Being a content creator for as long as she has, refusing to change her style no matter how many people disagreed and insulted her about it, she’s grown quite used to people spitting insults at her on every social media possible. It’s sad how throughout the majority of her content creating career she’s only had haters, creeps and fake fans watching her videos and streams. Rare are those in her fandom who’d actually stick up for her and defend her in ‘scandals’ such as this one. However, no amount of experience with dealing with hate could have prepared her for this outpour of some of the meanest shit she’s ever heard and been called in her life.

Y/N likes the content she makes, she’s comfortable in her skin and loves her body. She loves showing it off too and nor she nor anyone who wants that deserves to be shamed for who they are and what they do, especially when they aren’t hurting anyone and their content is still appropriate. People have always bashed her for all elements of who she is: her appearance, her clothing style, her streams, her gaming skills, her voice on occasion. She can count the instances when she’s received positive feedback on the fingers of her hands which would depress anyone else but not her. She’s always created content for her own amusement and entertainment so people’s opinions never really bothered her. Until now, until this very drama that has hit a specific nerve, an insecurity of hers she’s never talked about. The comments such as:

(Vy Speaking: Comments containing slut-shaming ahead, go to ### if you want to skip)

“Corpse would never date a slut like her“

“Corpse dating this thot? Please internet stop being ridiculous“

“Corpse ain’t a pimp, y’all need to chill“

“Even if they datin they gon break up soon - whore stays a whore“

###

bothered her far more than she’d like to admit. She has no one to open up about it either, she knows what she’ll get in response if she does - she’ll be told it’s her fault. Her fault because of the way she dresses, the way she talks and acts, because she chose this career to begin with. All her fault. The only person she can turn to she refuses to because she doesn’t want to be a bother - not after so many people confirmed her worries that she’s not good enough for him already anyway, the least she can do is avoid bothering him the best she can.

And that is exactly why this has upset Corpse so much.

“Here’s a little message specifically meant for those who claimed I’d never date someone like Y/N or specifically Y/N. You better listen carefully: Don’t you ever, and I mean EVER slut-shame my girlfriend or any other person ever. I cannot believe I have to explicitly remind you that your behavior isn’t ok. You should fucking know that your behavior isn’t right and that you’re a massive piece of shit for saying those awful things about others you judge solely on appearance and clothing. Does it surprise you that I am, in fact, dating Y/N? If you say yes for the reason you think she’s not good enough for me or that I deserve better, please get the fuck out of my fandom. No one disrespects my girl and gets away with it. That’s final!“

Though still under the influence of a flurry of negative emotions, overhearing Corpse literally telling people to exclude themselves from his fandom for being mean to her, Y/N’s taking a step towards emotional recovery knowing her boyfriend will always have her back. He’ll always be there to prove people wrong, defend her and stand by her. He’ll be there to catch her when the hate knocks her off her feet.

But most importantly: he’ll never ask her to change. Not her style, not her clothes, not her personality, nothing. He fell for her the way she is and for who she is, and he will never allow anyone to try to change her either. For someone who’s never had much support all her life, a single speck of support overpowers all the hate within the blink of an eye. Corpse will always be her knight in shining armor, the knight who defeated all the hateful demons by just entering her life. And though she’s still struggling with the ‘Am I good enough for someone so wonderful?’ and ‘He deserves better, doesn’t he?’ questions, with his hand holding hers, she’ll never let those doubts and insecurities overpower her.

@maat-the-prescriptive  @simonsbluee  @save-the-sky  @itsminniekat  @hacker-ghost  @bi-andready-tocry  @imtiredaffff  @jazzkaurtheglorious  @hereforbeebo  @fandomgirl17  @chrysanthykios  @maehemscorpyus  @loraleiix  @letsloveimagines  @annshit  @i-cant-choose-a-username-help  @enigmaticmaze  @divine-artemis  @waterlilypat  @idontknowwhatthisisfam  @evi-ka  @classyandfabulous00  @redperson58  @lilysdaydreams @solowheein  @mythicalamphitrite  @axen-gers  @luckygirl144  @nj01  @buddyemily   @the-albino-lioness  @stardream14  @gdhdkfnn  @nomadicgypsyy  @preciousskye  @fluffysuicideunicornsworld  @o-kaelin  @manacharlotte  @awkward-youtube-trash  @lolalee24  @bonky-beerns  @meme-lord-and-savior-sebastian  @strawbrinkofdeath  @teenloves  @tams0527  @browneyespinkhair  @starstruckllamapuppy  @daisychains012  @y0ulooked  @tinytacosuitcaseflap @supernatural-is-my-only-life  @jula-pauline  @melodykitty  @just-that-bi-girl  @crazybutconfidentaf  @lowellshade @alphakees  @bellero  @weallneednamjesus  @starryhanji  @boiled-onionrings  @husherstan  @fockingwhore  @melaningoddessthings  @prettypastelpetals  @haleypearce  @godwhyamiawkward  @y-napotat  @daisychainyoonmin  @little-miss-rebel3  @free-wheelin-bi-sexual  @redmoon261 @darkacademic2  @wiseflamingoqueen  @into-the-end  @namikhai-i  @nastiablr  @thelittleplantlover  @mirktuan  @dont-hyuck @jjk-bunny  @vintagegothlover  @easygoingtheatre  @itsrandombooklover  @miiaivi  @emmybaybee  @befourgolden  @jjk-is-my-shit  @eternalteaaars  @spacebadgerx  @princesslunalight  @acequinn14  @samm48  @misselsbells06 @simp-lykawa  @fo-love  @marishimomura-blog  @therealglenncoco  @cinnamonbun332  @killtherandomness  @sanshinexxxsan  @fee-btheweeb  @press-lay  @cathleenpotgieter16  @jazzydoesstuff  @moonlxghtbay  @forestrain2000  @hyunjinhugs  @blood-of-fandoms  @lovellylies  @ukiyolixx  @simpforhpcharacters  @chrisdylan17  @parkerjisung  @pedernille  @theodonyous  @wineandionysus  @malfoystilinskii05  @morbid-x  @coryisagee  @jessewa26  @scoobydooluver97 @mindintheskies365  @raeanneinwonderland  @indecisive-empanada  @gluttonypalace  @loriane2503  @btsiguess-kpop  @khaoticbunny  @lucidlycactus  @smiithys  @rottenroyalebooks  @kpopgirlbtssvt  @fangirl-tc27  @fr0z3n-1  @notmesimpingfortechno  @shotarosleftpinky  @kunoi-chan  @idk-whats-wrong-with-me  @yikeroonie  @goldenstarofthunderclan  @poetry-and-tea  @ama-do-writing-stuff  @wishbonewolf  @emeraldxhope  @t0xick1tty  @kusuinko  @speakyourselfloveyourself  @sophia902103  @lo-manburg  @classsykittykat  @dmgama  @depressedpuppythatneedscoffee  @btsiguess-kpop  @akaashi-baby  @gun-jong-simp  @geschichtenfee  @yerapotato-wp  @browneyedgirl365  @thysagclub  @sparklycloudnight  @helloatomicshadow  @queentorresstuff @vtte @val-gal  @lucy-bunny17  @aaliyahh0  @katluckybear  @boyleanti  @straybids  @franchesca-791  @cosmicstorm19  @averyisbackinthetrashcan  @hisokaslefttiti

[angelt0rres]

ok i KNOW the ask game said specify a character but i think all ur pronoun/sexuality takes on all the mash guys would be very cool :3

M*x im fucking love you thank you for the precious gift youve given me…

ALRIGHT M*A*S*H BOYS NIGHT PRIDE EDITION

Hawkeye- is malewife a gender nah but weirdly enough i think Hawk is a he/him but in a “Harry Styles wearing a skirt and nail polish in 2018 while everyone on the internet collectively lost their shit” way. He is, as if I even had to say it, a disaster bisexual.

Trapper- all around red blooded american man, he/him, not exactly disaster bisexual but bisexual with a sunglasses emoji infusion 😎. he WOULD find it funny/endearing if you used she/her pronouns like yes I am that bitch hello how may I help you.

B.J. HUNNICUT IS THE WHOLE FRUIT SALAD. Idk this is just my hc but I feel like he is definitely in a lavender marriage with Peg like they definitely are best friends and they do love eachother but holy fuck Bea Jay Hunnicut is a funny little mlm he/they I want to see him in pain

Frank Burns- he fucking sucks i dislike talking about him but I really wish they fleshed out the “secret repressed homosexual that hates himself” idea so yeah he/him passably straight on the outside little fruit tart on the inside

Charles Emerson Winchester III- Secret Repressed Homosexual that Hates Himself Prime. I am a gay Charles purist and I can and absolutely will die on this hill. who the fuck is Donna He/Him and sometimes the royal “we” just cause hes my special little guy and he can.

Henry Blake- his pronouns are they/them! actually though? I feel like Henry could pretty solidly slot into the non-binary identity. Is this based on fact? No! Its based entirely on vibes (which is arguably more accurate) unrelated but they would also wear the “Women want me fish fear me” hat without a trace of irony

Sherman Potter- now THERE is a trans man who wouldve fuckin thrown down at stonewall. he/him StraightGuy tm who just loves his wife and his horses Very Much. arent there a lot of stories of AFAB ppl dressing as men to join the army? also i hc all of his buds in Old Soldiers to be trans guys too.

Radar- whats that post that goes like “I think Radar is autistic with massive amounts of t boy swag” its really funny but I would like to tweak the narrative n this one. I think Radars mom has the type of rural homegrown wisdom where she thinks the severity of her morning sickness would determine the babies gender so she assumed Radar would be a girl so everyone got her little dresses and painted the Radars room pink but after Radar was born she just. raised her as a girl anyway? you cant exactly scrap a 1-10 year female wardrobe and buy new in Ottumwa so out of convenience he was raised as a girl but recognized as a boy. so i feel by the time he gets drafted in korea and has spent plenty of time performing as both genders he really doesnt care anymore and only prefers mens clothing because he personally finds it more comfortable. i think he would accept he/she/they pronouns and be demisexual.

Klinger- said you were a lesbian girl me too I really dont know how to explain is but Klinger is both a straight man and a lesbian at the same time. definitely he/they/she and demisexual like Radar… i feel like Klinger is your dads older sibling and Radar is your moms younger sibling. same vibes for sure but different auras.

Father Mulchahy- ive been waiting for this one (and another thank you to M*x for letting me on my soapbox) FATHER! MULCHAHY! IS! NOT! ASEXUAL! HE! TOOK! A VOW! OF! CHASTITY! TWO COMPLETELY DIFFERENT THINGS! Please dont feel like im coming for your neck specifically if this is your hc its totally valid to want ace representation and it would only feel natural to assign it to the character who doesnt have any relationships as a part of their backstory or characterization but I feel like only assigning Mulchahy with this role is not only some pretty upsetting ace tokenism but harmful to the sanctity of his faith and vows he took on as a priest. That being said! I think Mulchahy is bisexual (and would probably think Jesus was too) and I think you could address him with he/they pronouns but has a slight preference towards he.

Sidney Freedman- It seems like almost everyone in my post has come down with a case of the bisexual he/theys 🤒 but yeah besides Hawkeye I think Sidney would be the vocal about his identity? He could run circles around homophobes and transphobes who try to claim gay/transness to be a disease and I think his wife probably knows and supports his identity although they remain monogamous (Sidney is NOT a cheater >:( )

Thanks so much for the ask!! I hope I answered thouroughly enough and if I forgot anyone please let me know so I can hit myself really hard with a cast iron pan

[syn0vial]

Top 5 Boba moments 🥺

ohh fun! :D i’m gonna go in chronological order for these, just for organization’s sake. i’m also going to try and only include moments i haven’t talked much about before, just to keep things fun and fresh!

1. freeing the sea mice: starting from the very first boba fett junior novel the fight to survive, bc, well, chronological order! i like this moment bc it really emphasizes how innocent boba used to be. basically, there’s an aquarium with an eel in the fett’s kamino apartment and while jango and zam are off making bad decisions on coruscant, boba is tasked with it feeding aquatic rodents called “sea-mice” to the eel, something he’s never had to do before. but he doesn’t like doing it. the sea-mice always seem to trust him when he picks them up and he feels guilty for betraying them by feeding them to the eel. so, one day, he decides it’s going to be different. that morning, he feeds the eel his own breakfast (which is like, both sweet and hilarious, like honey did you really just throw your lunchables into an eel’s tank bc you wanted to make sure it was fed even while you’re out here freeing feeder mice? A+ for good intentions, F- for knowledge of how animals work) and tries to free a few of the sea-mice into kamino’s oceans. unfortunately, they don’t survive. the next day, boba reluctantly goes back to feeding the mice to the eel, telling one before he drops it in, “sorry; life is hard on the small and the weak,” echoing a saying of his father’s. this then becomes horrible foreshadowing for the rest of the series, in which boba is orphaned and suddenly finds himself being preyed upon by all sorts of antagonists. i know it’s a kids’ series and it’s Not That Deep, but i do really like that there’s a parallel created between boba and the mouse and the implication of the series as a whole that boba fett didn’t become a notorious hunter because he was always that way, but specifically because he started out as prey. also, it’s kind of hilarious in retrospect that boba felt compassion for rodents, but literally days later attempted to take obi-wan’s life without hesitation. kid’s really got his priorities in order.

2. standing up to jabba the hutt: this is from the junior novel boba fett: hunted, which is my favorite of the junior novels for him. in the story, boba pretends a short-statured adult by concealing his face with his father’s helmet and attempts to find work from jabba the hutt. however, when he finally gets an audience with jabba, jabba indeed offers to bring him back to his palace—as an indentured servant. and this freaking, like, eleven-year-old, staring down the criminal kingpin of tatooine with no weapons and no armor besides a too-big helmet, snaps at jabba the hutt, “my debt to you? what do i owe you for?” naturally, he is immediately set upon by one of jabba’s guards, and, well, i’ll let you read the rest :D

Boba had no time to think. He acted.

Without a sound, he leaped to one side. The Drovian’s knife whistled harmlessly through the air where, a nanosecond before, Boba had been.

“Huh?” gaped the hulking alien.

A small table stood near the viewscreen. Boba grabbed the table and swung it in front of himself, fending off the Drovian’s blade. Jabba himself watched, laughing coarsely.

“You will pay for this!” croaked the Drovian.

As the guard bore down on him, Boba thrust the table upward. The knife stuck in the wood surface. While the Drovian struggled to free his weapon, Boba pushed the table up farther. Then, he darted sideways, kicking at the lumbering guard’s knees. With a groaning thud, the Drovian stumbled and fell. Jabba’s guests laughed as Boba turned to breathlessly face Jabba.

“I am no one’s slave or servant!” Boba said. “I will work for you, for a price—but I will name that price!”

like, this kid really just brought down an armed adult with nothing but an end table AND finishes it off with a badass line defending his autonomy and defying jabba the hutt! definitely one of my favorite moments from the junior novels.

3. the Look he exchanges with lando while han is being tortured in the background

look, idk why this is so funny to me, but it is. lando’s just so full of loathing for this man who is complicit in forcing him to betray han and boba’s just like “you got shit to say to me. or nah?” he’s such a fucking asshole, i love it.

4. staying conscious just long enough to express his displeasure with the situation in iiiiii think the mandalorian armor, idk it’s been awhile: this story takes place post-RoTJ, after boba has escaped the sarlacc pit, killing it in the process, and is being gradually regaining his strength with the help of fellow bounty hunter dengar and amnesiac former slave neelah. at this point in the story, he’s still quite weak and spends most of his time slipping in and out of consciousness. unfortunately, some of boba’s enemies find out he’s still alive and just start fucking carpet-bombing their general location, so dengar and neelah go “shit, we need a bomb shelter, stat!”...and then slowly turn to look at the subterranean corpse of the sarlacc pit. they thus drag boba’s unconscious body back into the pit so they can all hunker down and wait out the bombs. except, surprise, surprise! the sarlacc ain’t completely dead. one of its giant tentacles starts attacking the group and is succeeding in getting the upper hand over dengar and neelah, when suddenly, boba wakes up. takes a look around and realizes where he is. and then grabs the nearest blaster and just goes apeshit firing on the tentacle, finally managing to kill it. too exhausted to talk, he then turns and fixes dengar with the angriest, most hate-filled glare the man has ever seen... and then promptly passes out. i remember just dissolving into giggles the first time i read that scene. just the mental image of boba fett giving dengar the scariest fucking “why the fuck did you fucking bring me back here” deathglare in the galaxy and then immediately losing consciousness. energy well-spent, boba.

5. that time boba did a mission completely in his underwear for no discernible reason, because daniel keys moran: this one’s just like. so delightfully bizarre that i’m not even going to try justifying it logically bc literally the only reason it exists was bc renowned EU author and certified mad man daniel keys moran really wanted to give boba his strong female character moment, because he deserves it. so, in this subplot, boba is tracking this devaronian war criminal who is holed up in a safehouse equipped with security systems that are triggered by the presence of, like, metal. which means boba can’t wear his armor plates and can’t use any blasters or other gadgetry. so boba loads up a compound bow and knife and makes to hunt this guy down. now, what about his armor? obviously, the most logical thing to do would be to just remove the metal plates and hunt in his flight suit. or, if that isn’t satisfactory, go out and buy like, leather armor or something? or just clothes? BUT NOPE. boba apparently goes, “well, if i can’t wear my armor, i’m not gonna wear ANYTHING” and just. does the entire mission in his underwear. he tracks and stalks this man, shoots him with an arrow, and then chases him down with a knife, ALL IN HIS UNDERWEAR. daniel keys moran even goes so far as to explicitly specify that these ain’t no long-johns, either. he’s like, “and the underwear...... MAINLY COVERED HIS DICK.” LIKE, DANIEL? DANIEL? HOW IS IT THAT OUT OF THE TWO BOBA FETT STORIES YOU’VE WRITTEN, BOTH OF THEM MENTION HIS DICK IN SOME CAPACITY? DANIEL? WHO KEEPS LETTING YOU GET AWAY WITH THIS??? and, like, can you imagine being this poor devaronian? you’re just living your fugitive war criminal life when an arrow hits you in the shoulder and boba fucking fett comes sprinting out of the woods at you in his underwear with a knife? what the fuck. this was canon at one point. what the fuck.

[vivid-wisp]

Friday Night Funkin but I compelled a list of every lore/canon thing confirmed about FNF, specifically story elements said by the devs themselves

DISCLAIMER: YOU CAN TAKE THIS WITH A GRAIN OF SALT IF YOU WANT. Despite the devs confirming things, remember they can obviously change their mind. This list includes minor/semi-important bits, so lore you probably don’t know. “Major” lore most people know won’t be on this. Long post. This includes most if not all canon details the devs have stated on their social medias like Twitter, Twitch, Reddit, etc. These are not personal ideas or headcanons. REBLOGS GREATLY APPREICATED.

Boyfriend

- Hair is naturally cyan, not dyed. He is 19 years old. Boyfriend is a college dropout. He likes just speaking in "beeps and boops" sounds, it's not a language. He has ADHD. He's afraid of lightning.

- Both his parents work in accounting, they also own a dog BF has but can't take care of himself. Not known what dog breed it is.

- He and Hatsune Miku are siblings, and because of this BF is most likely asian specifically Japanese. Miku will be aged up to be the older sibling if she ever gets into the actual game.

- He loves pepperoni pizza from Dominos. Loves donuts the most out all FNF characters.

- Him and Pico are exes. This makes BF apart of the LGBTQ+ community.

- BF is very dumb just like GF. This also means he’s very confident, essentially fearless.

- Boyfriend sucks at FromSoftware games. However he's a really good scout player in Team Fortress 2. He's also likely to say "pog."

- Boyfriend is very good at finger board tricks, it’s one of the reasons he won Girlfriend’s heart.

Girlfriend

- She is 19 years old and afraid of lightning. She’s a demon and is a lot more chilled back than BF, she’s very fearless. She’s taller than BF by a good bit.

- Her favorite soda is Cherry Dr. Pepper and Cheerwine. Her favorite pizza topping is olive.

- GF likes to play video games, her favorite being Tetris.

- GF is extremely dumb just like BF and puts a lot of faith into BF to handle things. She does have emotions, she’s just very chill, aloof, or too dumb to realize. Or all of the above.

- The rest of GF's family aren't famous rapper/singers, just Dad and Mom.

- BF is the “top” but GF lets him be. (Phantom Arcade said this directly)

Daddy Dearest

- Because DD is retired, he gets his income from DMCAing people on Youtube for using his songs and music.

-  At some point DD pretends to “accept” BF, which really makes it harder for BF and does more crazy tricks on him. It’s a case of “keeping your friends close and your enemies closer.”

- GF’s dad may have known BF’s dad before.

Skid and Pump

- They get afraid sometimes but not at the right things, like monsters they aren’t afraid but are of natural things like heights. Somewhat similar to BF and GF.

- Skid and Pump were tricked by the Monster to get GF as a “treat” which is why they rap battle BF. When they fail the Monster comes out in the scrapped song for Week 2.

Pico

- He is 20 years old. Pico's School is canon to the Friday Night Funkin' universe. He's depicted having a tooth gap as a kid.

- Pico is a mercenary who was hired by Daddy Dearest to kill BF, he was only given a location and not a picture or name. Turns out BF is actually someone Pico used to know, implied by Phantom as not seeing BF for a long time, possibly years.

- Pico has schizophrenia, likely caused by trauma from Pico’s School, it’s likely the reason he always carries his gun with him as he’s very paranoid of people. He may have more than just schizophrenia.

- Him and BF are exes. He's been described by Tankman/Captain as "sexually ambiguous friend."

- Likes to drink McDonald's Sprite. And just like BF, he's likely to say "pog."

Mommy Mearest/Mommy Must Murder

- Unlike the Dad who is a ex-rockstar, MM is still working her job as a popstar.

- Likes to drink White Claw.

- The Henchmen that appear in the back are actually 5 days old, because they were grown/bottles in jars. They are clones.

Monster/Lemon Monster

- Hijacked Week 5 at the mall after the battle duet with the Dad and Mom, everyone at the mall scattering after Monster’s appearance.

- Tricked the Spooky Kids to get the GF as a “treat” so that it can eat GF and BF.

- The head of Monster is not actually a lemon, it’s just how it’s head is shaped.

- Is able to twist perception, presumably why after the hijack by Monster everything looked gorey and twisted. 

Senpai/Spirit

- Senpai is just an AI in the game while Spirit is a completely separate entity from Senpai, who is self aware and is related to the real world.

- Senpai is used to being loved and admired, so when he’s not loved and doesn’t get his way he becomes a jerk. Senpai is a pathetic sore loser, that’s why he got angry after he lost to BF.

- GF used to play the Hating Simulator game all the time when she was younger like 8 years old and liked Senpai, but after being sucked into the game with BF and seeing how Senpai acted she doesn’t like Senpai and dislikes him.

- Spirit was trapped inside the character Senpai, Senpai is not being controlled by the Spirit. Senpai still acts as himself.

- The Spirit was trapped inside the game by the Dad, meaning there’s history of the GF’s dad having past relationships with other people.

- Senpai was originally a teacher and designed as one, but was later changed.

Ritz

- Ritz and BF are canonically brothers, in the sense of a "Stuart Little" situation. So adopted in a way.

- Ritz skateboards to travel sometimes.

Tankman/Captain

- The war area that Tankman and his men are on is a military base that BF and GF trespassed on, unlike the apocalyptic setting in the original Tankmen series.

- The Captain doesn’t actually know Pico, BF, or GF which make the assumptions he says “don’t you have a school to shoot up” and “no prom for you this year” false. He just says them because he’s an jerk.

Miscellaneous

- Every "week" takes place on a Friday.

- Week 2 happens after Week 4. And Week 6 happens after Week 5 or Week 2. This may be changed in the future.

- The characters' birthdays are on November 1st since that's when the game came out, not specified if it's just 1 or multiple characters' birthdays.

- Everyone's favorite fast food is Arby's. (Ninjamuffin however says he's only saying this since he wants to be promoted by them on Twitter)

- Yes Boyfriend and Girlfriend are their canon names, not Keith.

- Week 5 happens because BF takes GF on a date to visit Santa for Christmas, but the parents show up to ruin everything. Mall Santa is dead if you “game over” in Week 5.

- Week 7 happens because GF’s parents sent BF and GF on a “vacation” which was to crash a plane to kill BF, knowing GF would be fine. They land/crash near military zone which GF’s parents didn’t know or intended. Pico shows up because he was sent to “fetch the corpse” of BF, he didn’t kill BF obviously and is now in deep shit from GF’s parents after messing up his job twice.

[neowinestainedress]

⸺ REQUESTS RULES   ⸺

I already had a section about this under 'about the blog' but since I've changed some things and I want it to be easier to find, I made this separate post. Also, I'm gaining a lot of new followers and I need to clarify some things.

REQUESTS: closed

⸺ RULE 1 I don't write y/n unless you send me a request for a drabble. The main reason is that I don't like writing in second person but I decided to give it a try for these smaller requests and it doesn't 'trigger' me this bad so I'll keep going for now. If the stories are requested, I've been trying to don't give the main character a name unless I've been discussing the story more with the anon and they don't mind it.

⸺ RULE 2 Since I've been also accepting drabbles, when you send a request, please specify if you want a drabble or if you want a longer fic (+1000k words count, more details, etc). HOW?

DRABBLES REQUESTS "member(s) + kink/phrases/whatever you want" of course you can also add a rant in it or if you have something more specific but just use that format so I'll know you want a short thing and with the 2nd person pov.

STORIES REQUESTS In the same way you've always been doing, maybe use the word "request" so I'm sure it's a longer story.

⸺ TIMING I always answer the requests you send, if I accept them and even if I feel like don't write them (for now it never happened). So if I tell you I'll write it, I will. I'd like to follow the time order I've been sent them but it's all about inspiration and sometimes I write a story in a day and some others it takes me months. If I make you wait it's not because I hate you but because I want it to be as good as possible, especially since it has been requested and that means you trust me with it. When it comes to drabbles I've been answering them in the span of the day (but it can change because I also have a life and I'm a student)

⸺ HOW DO I KNOW YOU'RE WORKING ON IT? HERE. You find a list of all my upcoming works. I update it often so it's accurate. I also have the #requests updates to keep track of them

⸺ MEMBERS I DON'T WRITE ABOUT I don't feel the same inspiration for everybody and it's also pretty random. If you don't see a member in my masterlist I probably don't write about them (except for wayv, I have stories in the wip with Kun and Yangyang that I should post for October)

⸺ THINGS I WON’T WRITE ABOUT 

graphic sa

mafia 

I’m not a big fan of name-calling like slut/whore so I avoid using it as much as possible (but i put degradation/humiliation kink in my works, I simply don’t use those terms) 

age regression / age play / infantilization of any kind 

scat play, feet fetish, somnophilia, cnc, korean honorific kink 

extremely big age gaps (my limit is around ten years) 

prostitution (not in a romanticized way but I think that aside from the poly series I won’t use this topic on any other occasion either) 

high school au (only if I need some kind of flashbacks but otherwise I’m too old for that shit, and so are the people I write about) 

⸺ ONE LAST THING When you send a request it would be nice to let me know what you think about the story once I post it, EVEN if you didn't like it (of course, be polite). In general, feedback is always appreciated but requests are something done for you because you specifically asked them. If I didn't like writing them I wouldn't accept them, but please keep in mind that it's even harder to write a story with an idea that doesn't come from your brain.