#I know a lot more about books than movies I'm afraid

[misc-obeyme]

I have today and tomorrow off and it's really so weird because I'm not used to them being in a row 😭 but then I'm scheduled six days straight after that soo

i keep getting tiktoks about Book of Life and I wanna rewatch that so bad because it's one of my favorite movies. I don't know if it'd fit but I love putting my favorite characters into other media i enjoy (crossovers technically?) so i keep imagining mc and Mammon as Manolo and Maria. And then probably Solomon as Joaquin, just because he's my other favorite.

but Manolo literally sings "heaven knows your name, I've been praying" while trying to serenade Maria and it gets me every time. I have the perfect mental image to redraw that scene with Mammon and Mc but I can't put it on paper so AAAA

anyway i wanted to ask if you had any movie recs or anything because I don't know what to do with myself other than read all day tomorrow. OH AND ALSO IF YOU WERE GONNA WATCH THE ECLIPSE, A COWORKER GAVE ME GLASSES WHICH I WAS HAPPY ABOUT

- ✨ anon

I hope you enjoy your days off! I think it's always nice to have multiple days in a row... due to be an office gremlin, I always get the two regular weekend days off. I kinda have to use Saturday as a reset day because I'm so exhausted from the week lol. So it's nice to have that extra day for other things! (Usually chores in my case.)

Anyway, I had to look up The Book of Life because I have never heard of it before now. It sounds good! I definitely think you should rewatch it. And yeah, I think that's kinda how it goes with art? You've got the vision in your mind but the hands cannot replicate it. It can be like that with writing, too. It's just trying to convey to someone else the picture you see in your mind and it never comes out the same.

But it's definitely fun to do crossover ideas, like putting characters in other stories. I had a feverish few days obsessing over which Obey Me characters would be who in a King Arthur AU. It's just really interesting to consider how their personalities would change the story, you know? (Not me also kinda thinking about a LOTR AU kadsfkl.)

I'm afraid I may not be the best person to ask for movie recs? I don't watch a lot of movies. Generally I have the attention span problem lol. I do watch them occasionally, like I finally watched Knives Out & Glass Onion which I totally loved. But I suppose it also depends on what sorta genre you're into... I suppose those are like murder mystery style but they're also just very funny. Dang I'm trying to think of other movies I've watched recently but yeah there's not a lot... the most recent thing I've watched is Dungeon Meshi/Delicious in Dungeon on Netflix which is so so good. I know it's like the tumblr rage right now, but I'm really loving it.

Though due to my inability to watch current movies, I have a lot of older classics that I like. Monty Python and the Holy Grail comes to mind immediately. I also love the old school Clue movie it's so good. And I'm a huge fan of Studio Ghibli movies, so any of those, but I know a lot of peeps have already seen them. Other older animated movies from my childhood like The Road to El Dorado and The Emperor's New Groove and Anastasia. Oh and of course I'm a huge fan of all the Lord of the Rings movies but I know that can be kind of a commitment. I also liked Pan's Labyrinth, The Birdcage, Coco (if you wanna CRY), The Boondock Saints (uh very bloody this one though), and I always kinda had a thing for martial arts movies like I love Legend of the Drunken Master lol but also Hero and of course the classic Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon (there's a sequel on Netflix that was also very good). Oh and I did see Everything Everywhere All At Once which I really enjoyed!

Er so I guess that's more than I thought lol. But there are a lot of times when people will be like you haven't seen X movie!?! And I just hafta be like... I don't watch movies a lot, sorry??

As for the eclipse, I am not going to be watching it because I don't have protective eye wear and my eyesight is already terrible. I didn't realize it was happening until like today oops. I did see part of the last one... I think that happened a handful of years ago? I can't quite remember when it was, but I did experience it!

Anyway, I don't know how helpful any of this was, but I hope you enjoy your time off either way!

[yelenasdiary]

If you weren’t planing on writing it (and as your request are still open I’m going to take advantage of that sorry) can you write your idea of reader being Peggy and dottie daughter and dating Nat but mostly dottie gets overprotective?

Meet The Carters

Pairing: Peggy Carter x Daughter! Reader, Dottie Underwood x Daughter! Reader, Natasha Romanoff x Reader || High School AU.

Summary: When your mother, Peggy, discovers you have a girlfriend, she asks you to bring her to dinner. When your other mother, Dottie, lays eyes on the girl you've been dating, things take a turn.

Angst, Fluff

Warnings: Mentions of Red Room, Overprotective Parent?? Slight Mention of Child Abuse (reader being abandoned and malnourished), Nat is 17, Reader is 16 | K

AC: I finally got around to writing this! At first, I was writing it as a drabble but I got carried away and now it’s a full fic lmao! I hope you enjoy! x

You were unpacking your study books from your backpack when your mother knocked on the door, chewing on an apple slice, she smiled softly at you. 

"Who was that you were hugging just now?" She asked in her thick British accent as she leaned against the door frame. Your cheeks felt warm as you turned to face your mother. "Just a friend" you replied. 

You've been dating Natasha for a few months now, it was still rather new and not a lot people knew, just a few friends. Natasha is a year older than you and you weren't too sure how your mothers would react to the small age gap or how they would react to you dating in general. 

"Oh, come on sweetie, I know a friendly hug when I see one and that wasn't one" you Peggy tease as she took a seat at the end of your bed and watched as you set your homework on your desk ready to tackle after an afternoon snack. 

"Were you spying on me?" You asked with a cocked brow. Your mother chuckled, "I'm afraid that noticing things is a huge part of my job that now just comes naturally outside of work. So, come on, who is she?" 

You couldn't help the growing smile that took over your face, you took a seat next to your mother. She was always the one you got along with a little better. You loved Dottie but sometimes you felt she was a little harder to connect with than Peggy. "Her name is Natasha" you answered, blushing more than you wanted to show. 

"Natasha" Peggy repeated, "How about you invite her to dinner tonight, we'll have pizza and a movie. I want to meet this girl who's making you turn redder than tomato" she added. Playfully, you rolled your eyes but agreed to ask her. 

----

When Dottie came home from work, she hugged you tightly as if it would be the last time she would hug you but you didn't think too much of it and asked how her day was. 

"It was, well, work. How was your day?" she replied. She never spoke about her job or what she did. In fact, you never knew what she did for a living, you once asked when you were around six years old, and she told you she as like mommy and helps take the bad guys off the streets, but her job was super-secret and only mommy knew about it. You never asked her about it again after that.

You were only a year old when Peggy found you abandoned in a dark alley way. She took you to the hospital and called child services, she stayed by your side the entire time you were in the hospital. You were malnourished and very underweight for a baby of your age. When the time came for you to be released from hospital and into the care of child services, Peggy couldn't bare somebody else taking care of you and that's how Peggy became your mother. You were two years old when Dottie and Peggy got married and now you have two mothers. 

"Oh you know, school is, well, school" you replied to tease.

"Very funny" Dottie cocked a brow, "why has mom got the dinner table set?" She asked when she noticed the table was set for four instead of three. You sat down on the sofa and picked up the television remote before working up the nerve to tell her who was coming over. "Uhm, well, my girlfriend is joining us for dinner tonight, it was mom's idea" you replied quickly turning the TV on. 

"Girlfriend? Since when?" Dottie frowned. You chewed your bottom lip, "Since four months ago" you kept your eyes on the TV only to be saved by Peggy just before Dottie could ask anymore questions. 

"Honey, your home!" She smiled, placing a kiss on her wife's lips. 

"Who is this girlfriend that is coming over?" Dottie asked before Peggy dragged her into the kitchen. You couldn't hear much but little whispers here and there. You knew that Peggy was telling Dottie not to overreact and that there would be a time when you would bring somebody home to meet them. 

You tried to listen more but a knock at the door made your stomach flutter with nerves as you got up to answer it. Natasha smiled softly in her leather jacket, jeans, and black tee. "I hope I'm not late" she spoke. You shook your head, "early actually, the pizza hasn't arrived yet" you smiled as you invited her in.

"Just a heads up, Peggy is excited to meet you and Dottie, well, I'm not too sure how she feels. She just found out a moment ago that I had a girlfriend" you rambled. Natasha placed a kiss on your cheek, "it'll be okay" she whispered. 

Your mothers came out of the kitchen, Peggy smiled instantly while Dottie's eyes widened. You didn't want to say anything, but it disappointed you that she wasn't even ready to give Natasha a chance to show how amazing she was. 

"You must be Natasha, it's lovely to meet you" Peggy greeted your girlfriend. 

"Y/n didn't mention you were English" Natasha replied, lying of course. 

"Oh, yes. England born and raised" your mother smiled once more, "this is my wife, Dottie. Don't mind her, she's had long day at work" she added as Dottie stepped forward to shake Nat's hand. She noticed the look of worry on your face and for your sake gave the red head a soft smile, "it's lovely to meet you" Dottie said. 

"Thank you both for having me over tonight, it's a pleasure to meet you both" Natasha replied. 

----

You and Natasha sat across from your parents while the four of you chatted and ate pizza, neither one of your mothers were great cooks so you were glad it was take-away night for Natasha's sake. 

"You mentioned you moved to Ohio, where were you before that?" Dottie asked. If looks could kill, Natasha would've been dead the moment your mother laid eyes on her. During the entire dinner you noticed that your mother was very focused on Natasha while Peggy was more laid back and enjoyed your girlfriend's company. 

"I was actually born in Russia and my family moved to Ohio because of my father's work" Natasha replied, keeping strong eye contact with your mother who didn't seem to relax. 

"Well, Y/n didn't mention you were Russian!" Peggy commented with a chuckle as she referenced Natasha's first comment to her earlier in the night. Natasha chuckled, "Russian born and raised, kinda" she replied. Dottie excused herself from the table, using the excuse to use the bathroom but you knew it was just a way for her to leave the room. You followed after her, Peggy taking a deep breath and offered that her and Nat go outside and enjoy some fresh air. 

"What is your problem mom?" You asked, following Dottie into your parent's bedroom. She turned to you and shook her head, "She needs to leave and you're not to see her again. Do you understand me?" she said sternly. You closed the door behind you to prevent Natasha from hearing anything that left your mother's lips. 

"No, I don't understand! You've known her for a few hours, and you haven't even tried to give her a chance!" You snapped. 

"I don't need too; I know this is hard for you to understand but this is for your safety"

"My safety?! Natasha isn't some criminal you and mom need to take off the streets!" You frowned. 

"She's worse that that! She's exactly the type of person I don't want my daughter around!" Dottie snapped; you've never heard this tone from her before. Her eyes were full of worry which took you back, your mother had never looked at you with so much fear before. "What is it mom?" You asked in a calmer tone. Dottie shook her head, "you need to ask her to leave, and you can't see her again, I need you to trust me" she repeated. 

"No, if you want Natasha to leave, you ask her" you replied before leaving the room to join Natasha and Peggy outside. "Everything okay love?" Natasha asked, placing a hand on your hip while she brushed a lock of hair behind your ear. "Yeah" you sighed, "can we go get some ice cream or something? I don't want to be here right now" you added. 

"Honey, your mom just needs a little time to get used to that fact you're growing up" Peggy inserted herself. 

"No mom, she didn't even give Natasha a chance and you know it!" You looked over at your mom with tears of frustration filling your eyes. "I think I know what this is about" Natasha replied softly, "let me go talk to her" she added, placing a kiss on your forehead. 

"Don't say another word" Dottie's voice made you turn to the back door where she stood. 

"Dottie!" Peggy snapped, "Leave it alone" she added. Your mother's words made you frown, "no, why can't Nat say anything? What is going on?" You demanded answers. 

"I'm not going to lie to her, Dottie, you might but I won't" Natasha looked at your mother before turning to you, "Your mother and I have the same job, it's not even a job. We don't get paid. We're trained at a place called the Red Ro-"

"Natasha!" Dottie interrupted with a stern tone while her eyes burned into Natasha's. "Can I have a word?" She asked. Natasha nodded and followed your mom into the living room while Peggy did her best to keep you from following them. 

"I hoped this day wouldn't come so soon" your mom started. 

"What do you mean mom? Please, can you just tell me what's going on?" you asked with arms crossed over your chest. Peggy sat down on one of the outdoor chairs on the porch, she patted the seat next to her and you took a seat beside her. "Your mom used to work for an organisation called Red Room. I've been working endlessly to try and find the location of this place but it's almost impossible. They take girls, from the street, pay for them and brainwash them. Your mother was trained to kill people…" Your mother went on to explain. 

Tears streamed down your face by the time Peggy had finished explaining everything to you. Now you know everything and the reason why your mother never told you how work was because she's been trying to stay in the organizations good books to get back to head office to give Peggy the location. Natasha is what they call a widow, she's on a mission and being with you was never part of the plan. 

You went inside, not caring about what Nat and your mother were talking about, you walked by Natasha and hugged your mother tightly. She hugged you back just as tight before you let her free and turned to Nat, "so how about that ice cream?" You asked with a soft smile. Natasha read between the lines and nodded, "do you guys want to come?" You asked looking at both your mothers. 

"You know what, ice cream sounds really good right now" Dottie smiled softly, "Natasha, what do you drive?" She asked. 

"A motorcycle" Nat replied. Dottie looked to Peggy then back to Nat, "How about I drive us" she suggested. 

Taglist:  @boredandneedfanfics | @music-4ever | @karmasgxrl | @milkeeteaa | @marvelwomen-simp | @swaqcenix | @mostlymarvelsstuff | @scarlettbitchx | @mallyka-blog | @itsalwaysskorpioszn | @angel68104 | @x-natsarrownecklace-x | @caporal-nino | @natashamaximoff-69 | @evilcr0ne | @boredandneedfanfics | @teganmiller | @ihavezeroclue13 | @tobiaslut | @anonwhowrites | @itsmelulu | 

If you want to be on the taglist for my work, please click HERE.

[toomanythoughts2]

Here's some miscellaneous Metalocalypse headcanons. I'm gonna put them here just to get them down.

Skwisgaar has flat feet, which will result in leg problems later in his life.

Toki has nerve damage to his back and he can't feel it in places. He has to go to massage therapy for it every week so it doesn't get too bad.

Murderface has long hair, his fro is just so dense. It's as long as Skiwsgaar's hair.

Stella Murderface is William Murderface's paternal grandmother, so his mother is Stella's Daughter-In-Law and his father is their biological son. Murderface's looks skipped his father, so his father and his mother were average looking individuals. The idea that Murderface's looks were the catalysis for his father's mental break were probably intensified because of the paternal skip.

Murderface's mom was very excited for William's birth. She spent a long time getting ready for his arrival. William was a wanted, planned child, whose mother was fully encapsulated in being a good mom. She took so many photos of her pregnancy and had a baby book prepared. Mama Murderface was fully ready to be a mom. When William was born, she fell in love with him. William is probably less than a year when they died, but more than 4 months. Up until their death, his mom obsessed over him, loved him, cared for him. There are so many baby photos of him up until their death, and his baby book ends at the same age of when they died.

Murderface has multiple photos of his mother tucked safely in his room. He looks at them when he's feeling particularly sad and lost. He'll look back over the home movies she took, listen to her voice, listen to how much she loved him and how she was waiting for him. He blocks out his father in the video as much as he can. He hates him more than he hates himself.

Toki has a hobby grave yard. However, he is not afraid of any hobby and will at least become competent in them.

Pickles still doesn't really understand the internet. He's got the concept but it alludes him for the most part.

Toki's family is actually the black sheep of the majority of the family and Toki is the black sheep within the black sheep.

Toki was on his way to becoming the next Reverend after Aslaug, but the family at large was very wary of this possible development. They avoided Toki at all cost due to his presence with death and his possible future position in the family.

Everyone has neck pain from head banging and windmilling, so they have physical therapy on their necks to keep them strong and to stop any further deterioration.

Nathan has back pain. Like really bad back pain. Him and his father, since they are larger men, have consistent back issues that make it hard to stand for long hours.

Rose is Nathan's biggest supporter. She co-signed on the apartment, she helped get him his first van, she helped pick out stage clothes, she painted his nails. He would read his lyrics out to her (and his dad) at the dinner table and she would help him with lyrics and support his direction. Rose knew that Nathan's life was not leading him to college, but to something else, and she fully believed that he could do anything he set his mind to.

Skwisgaar is double jointed and can pop and crack his knuckles. Murderface and Pickles DESPISE it.

While there are many "Deaddy Bears", there is only one true, original Deaddy Bear. It's the one that got burnt up in "Dethkids" but it came back afterwards. Why? BECAUSE IT'S POSSESSED! ITS A POSSESSED DEADDY BEAR KINDA LIKE THE VELVETEEN RABBIT! TOKI MADE IT BE ALIVE WITH HIS LOVE AND THE TRUAMA! TOKI NEVER QUESTIONS IT AND THE BAND IS VERY WORRIED ABOUT IT!

Murderface has gotten himself stuck in the Iron Maiden before.

There's a lot more wholesome/domestic moments within the band dynamic than their fans or even the label knows about. It's regular shit, like a routine they have worked out with themselves about how to live with each other without going crazy.

They do the "Do you want my broccoli?" "I can take your rice." "Here, take the pepper, I dont want it." kind of switch with their food when they go out. It's just a choirs of plate scraps from one plate to another.

[watercolourferns]

If there0s a villain that actually scared the soul out of me in a very raw and "I wanna get out of her presence" way, is Dra. Volumnia Gaul.

Viola Davis as a villain?? More excellent and mesmerizing than you'd think! She nailed the character, imo. And she did it so well that I think I'll have nightmares.

Don't worry, no spoilers from the movie, but by now I'm sure you've read the book.

Dr. Gaul comes off as not just villanous and 100% evil, SHE COMES OFF AS NON-HUMAN. In contrast with Highbottom, Arachne, and Grandma'am (yes, she's sort of an antagonist as she molds Snow's character negatively a lot) Dr. Gaul doesn't look like your typical villain in a dictatorship; she simply doesn't react like a regular human does.

She's not overly arrogant, nor overly spiteful, she knows she's good and she knows the power she wields not just as Game-Maker but also as a doctor; yet she's far removed from what's happening around her in the sense that it doesn't affect her negatively...up until the 10th games, but as I said, no spoilers. And even after that she recovers very well and doesn't take it personally.

She views humans and Panem literally as her laboratory and she takes her role as Game-Maker very seriously, but she's not pompous about it. She's a lot like Heavensbee in the sense they're both cunning, cold calculators... but Dr. Gaul takes it up another notch and isn't afraid of using innocent humans for her own research ends, and punishing people? A breeze. I think she doesn't regard humans as anything other than hairless apes she can do her research on. She reminds me of a certain doctor during WWII...

She's not driven by anger, hate, vengeance, pride... I'm not sure what drives her to do the things she does... it could be power? But I think it's a kind of undiluted, twisted, sick curiosity of how things work and how far she can push the limits, how much she can play to be a God before she breaks it... and part of the reason she needs to retain power is to keep the resources to continue pushing the limits of biology to satisfy her morbid curiosity... If there's a portrayal of psycopathy that isn't over the top, clownish, but has flair and is quite interesting that's Dr. Gaul.

I think she's responsible for the... feel of the Capitol in THG books and movies, that fakeness, plastic, unnatural coldness of it that puts Katniss off so much. It's like she created a psycopathic ENVIRONMENT, no empathy, no compassion, no feelings...

Re-watching and re-reading the saga I can see Dr. Gaul's trademark in a ton of things... and that's why I think she's the scariest villain... She bred a whole host of psychopaths that don't know they act psychopathic and are so vapid and shallow they can be pupeteered to do anything the people in power want... The Capitol was her largest experiment and her biggest success...

P.S. All my respect to Viola Davis... she's embodied a character that will probably mark the way villains are seen after this. I love her range and mastery of acting so so much.

[rorichuu]

Hello Rori!! <33

May I request Sniper, Medic and.. hmm, maybe Scout or Pyro with comforting the reader?

To be more precise, if it's alright:

Reader is sweet and always trying to keep everyone happy as well as the vibes up around the base- always making sure everyone is appreciated and cared for, but maybe they're starved for affection themselves? Maybe they're afraid of being too overbearing or 'bugging' everyone. So one day they go up to (merc) and ask if they're being too much and that's when they get comforted? Maybe some comfort cuddles and such- whatever you think suits the character!

A drabble would be preffered, please!

-@simp999 ♡

(Also, thank you for being so kind and sweet to interact with!! I'm so glad I found your blog- lots of respect for all the effort put in as well!)

shy away ; mercs x reader

pairing: sniper/medic/scout x gn!reader

authors note: hello! and thank you!! your words mean soso much, i love this ask!! - also i apologize for posting so late :(

disclaimer: none! pure fluff, mentions of spy/engi in scout's. :)

SNIPER:

The battle neared its end, BLU considerably pushed back this time around and it was unbearably visible. Y/n was shooting around; running up to any merc who needed the assistance they needed. Sniper took a seat at the table in the rec room, observing you. You had just gotten water for Heavy and were conversing with Demo, his slurred mouth pouting from their loss as you kindly spoke praises to lift his mood.

Of course, everyone noticed how sweet and considerate you were, it was your best trait... and they appreciated you deeply for it. But Sniper had always wondered if you had been taken care of all the same.

As the room began to file out, you let out a heavy sigh, knowing you did the best you could. Sniper stood, making you turn your head; you send a smile at him. "Didn't notice you were here," you say. Sniper nods, sending a small smile in return. "I have some water I grabbed from the supply room. I know today was... rough. Is there anything that you need?" You asked with your eyes pointed up with question. The New Zealander shook his head, shifting the rifle on his shoulder.

"No, roo. I'm alright," With his head tilted down, he about walked off before you opened your mouth; the sound of you shifting your shoe against the pavement lifted his ears. Sniper looked behind him, eyes on yours. You stood small, shoulders low, and eyes the sweetest he's seen. His eyebrows furrowed now. "Well, on with it then..." He spoke, turning his body to you.

"Am I too much sometimes?" Sniper was caught off guard by this. "Like, when I'm always checking it... I can understand if it's annoying or overbearing when I'm always asking." With every word you spoke, Sniper felt his heart sink just a little bit more. The team needed someone like you. They needed your tender heart when the battle was unforgiving. Your gentle hand when the rough of the gun scarred and tore theirs. They needed someone like you.

Sniper huffed, walking over as he placed both hands on your shoulders, leaning to meet your eyes. "You've never been," you gulped, feeling your cheeks warm. "You mean more to this team than ya' believe, mate." You dip your head to hide your face, Sniper smiles before wrapping his arms around you.

"This is… nice." You laughed as you melted in his hold, comfort washing over you.

"You deserve the care and attention just as much as we do."

. . .

And as time passed, he rubbed your back as you held him. Frequently, he'd sway, but only to find your eyes closed. Sniper then took that as his cue, one hand on your shoulder and the other taking his hat off. The Aussie laid it on top of your head, leaving you looking up at him.

"Let’s go watch a movie.”

MEDIC:

You were helping Medic pick up, politely asking where goes where and what does what... curiosity always found in the dusted books and pristine tools that scatter his room. It was nearing the end of the day; time had settled and nearly everyone was asleep. The clock is sung at 12AM, letting you know it is time for you to head to bed as well.

You have always helped clean up and provide assistance to those who need it... especially with Miss Pauling. Always lending out a hand when it's needed. The day was long, the mercs were exhausted, and you sure as hell were too... but you could always get sleep the next coming hour, right?

Medic let out a hefty sigh with a rub at his temples, your instincts kicked in. "Medic?" You hummed in question, the man looking up with tired eyes.

"Ja?" His voice croaked, his eyebrows now raised with inquiry. As you started to place his surgical tools neatly on his steel table, you began:

"Are you alright?" You look up at him, and the man huffs a small smile. His, then leaned stance, against his operation table was left to approach you.

"Yes, mein freund," (my friend) he puts a hand on your shoulder as he takes the rest of his tools from you. "Go get some rest. You need your 8 hours!" He chirped despite his sluggish posture, not convincing you enough. You noticed the eyebags that slumped, the movements that slowed, the yawns that escaped... undeniably, he was tired.

"Well... what about you?" You ask, leaving Medic slightly confused as he turns his shoulder, glasses falling to the tip of his nose.

"How do you mean, Y/n?" You take a deep breath and cross your arms. Medic raises an eyebrow, his free hand pushing his spectacles up to their original place.

"You should get some sleep... I can pick up the rest. I know it's been a tough week, so I can help!" and in response, Medic's lip quirks humorously. "Really, I can!" As much as you try to persuade him, he doesn't budge.

"I know you can," fondly, he looks at you. "But doctor's rules, Y/n." He walks past you and continues to aid to his unkept office. You were left biting your lip, hands clasped together in front of you as you continued to let your mind race. Perhaps you were pushing Medic towards something he didn't want? Maybe he was annoyed with your continuous advances of lifting the heavy load of his job... what were you to say about what he can and cannot do?

With a knitted brow, your mouth gapes open with the intention to speak. "Hey," you nearly whispered, intimidated by your own question. The German man's head pops out from his desk, a small 'Ja?', making you aware of his reply. "Am I too much sometimes?"

"Wie bitte?" (Excuse me?) Medic, caught off guard entirely, lifts from the floor with his palms leaned against his workspace. You swallowed hard, his tone higher than usual.

"Like... when I try to help or ask if you're doing alright," you timidly voiced. "I understand how it can be draining with my constant check-ups and stuff." The doctor sent you a small smile, whether you saw it or not with your chin tucked close to your chest... he let out a laugh, walking towards you with both hands now placed on your shoulders. You look up at him, cheeks flushed with his sudden hold.

"As a doctor, nobody checks up on me. I'm always delighted by your check-ups, Liebling." With every word he spoke, your lip curled into a pout, your heart softening. Medic patted your head. "You always do the best you can for everyone, but remember to take care of yourself, ja?" Suddenly, Medic is met with a breath-losing hug. Though his chuckle is shallow, his arms wrap around you just as tightly.

"Thank you."

"No," he shakes his head, hands now cupping your face. "Thank you!" He cheeses, leaving you a small laughing fit of his big smile. "You're help is always deeply appreciated, schatz." (Treasure).

Coo

"Ooh, even Archimedes thinks so!"

SCOUT:

Scout was... undeniably, very beat up. He groaned and whined as you gently pressed alcohol swabs against his injuries upon his arm. "Ow! Y/n, is this really necessary?" You sighed, throwing the swab in the trash and retrieving a large bandaid in turn.

"Yes, Scout... I can't have you getting infections or something, it's a pretty big gash," You spoke as you placed the wrap on the lower part of his elbow. "I can't have you whining all hurt like this."

"And Scout, please keep drinking your water."

The man scowled as he took a large sip from his cup, the swirly straw found from the back of the cabinet in the kitchen. (Scout likes the swirly straw, wink wink... but tell no one.)

. . .

As time passed, and Scout continuously cursed at the sting of the alcohol... he was finally all patched up. You lifted from your arched position, back cracking as you stretched. "Alright, you're done." You huff in exhaustion. This boy knows no boundaries when it comes to the battlefield...

The Boston boy leaped from the couch and placed his cup down, water splashing out with a plat; Scout was thankful he was done. "Are you feeling okay? If not I can get some painkillers, I bet Medic has some..."

"Y/n! C'mon man, I'm good!" His balled fist hits your shoulder playfully, rolling his eyes as he checks out the bandaids on his arm. "Stop worryin' over little ol' me, it'll save you from getting greys... take Spy for example! He's just as bad as Engi being a helicopter mom... god, how did they even become a thing."

You chuckled softly, hand holding your shoulder as you listened to him ramble on again. For as long as he talked, he hadn't realized you weren't listening, your eyes spacing off. The boy tilted his head. "Y/n?" ... "Y/n!" Your head perked up at the sound of your name.

"Hm? Yeah?" You hummed. Scout read you like a book; your hand placed at your shoulder, spacing off, sad face... that's 'anxious Y/n face'; he somethin' was up.

"You good? You seem kinda off." He asked, furrowed eyebrows as he leaned forward... arms crossed as he looked you over to see if anything was upsetting you.

You shook your head, waving a hand as you backed away. "Oh, yeah! I'm good, just. Oh, just thinking." You turned and immediately started to pick up the first-aid supplies and his half-finished cup. But before you could lift the glass from the table, Scout's hand surrounded yours to keep the cup where it was.

"Talk to me."

Scout was a sweet boy. He may talk a lot, and may not think much of what he says... but when he knows when to listen, he does. You take a deep breath, pulling your hand away from his. "Do you ever get annoyed by me? Genuinely..." You ask, biting the inside of your cheek nervously. Scout blinked.

"Huh?!"

"Well, you know what I mean!" You exclaim in response, shrugging. "Y'know I'm always making sure you're alright and if you need anything... people can get annoyed when I'm always checking in." You frown, and Scout places his hands on his waist now before approaching you.

"Which people?" He asks and you tilt your head.

"Wha-?" Your nose scrunches in confusion.

"Which people find you annoying when you check up on 'm?" There was a moment of silence, your head slowly lowering in thought. The boy lifted his hand and tapped your chin, motioning for you to look at him. "Y'know I'd beat them up in a millisecond if someone said somethin'!" With a swift lift of his arm, he flexed. You huff, worry still washed over you. Scout eased up, turning to slump down on the couch. He patted the seat next to him. "C'mon, sit."

You sighed and followed, sitting down next to him, only to have an arm wrapped around your shoulders... You were now leaning completely against him. Scout shook you slightly. "You really don't know, do ya?" he finally speaks, your head turned to look at him. You blink. "Oh boy..."

"'Oh, boy,' what!" You frown, your heart picking up a pace as you tense in his hold. The Boston boy chuckled.

"Everybody loves your help!" He chimes, looking up at you brightly. "You remember the other day when Pyro was yabberin' off about something?" "Yeah..."

"They were upset because they messed something up on their drawing. They immediately thought of you, Y/n." Your heart begins to warm.

"Oh, and Spy needed your help on whatever the hell he was doing. Kept saying, 'Where's Y/n? Where's Y/n?' It was like he was a broken record, pfft, embarrassing."

"That was... you, Scout." Your lip curls into a smile, and Scout blushes.

"Well, whatever! Moral of the story," he waves his hands in a dramatic flare. You chuckle. "People love ya! And we're always there for you as you are for us." He pats your shoulder as you lean against him once more. "But that also means you gotta take care of yourself too... you're just as important. Ya always will be."

Sniffle.

"Aaalright, c'mere," swiftly, Scout grabs the blanket from the arm of the couch, wrapping you up. "Take a nap, Y/n. You deserve it."

And you did. With a warm heart and a proud Scout, life was pretty good.

.

.

.

rorichuu!

[nalyra-dreaming]

I think some non book fans have a misconception that Loustat just isn't important in the books. And I know us book fans are partly to blame for making jokes about Louis disappearing in the books. But. Loustat is the most important relationship in the books. Lestat and Louis always circle back to each other. And TVL and QOTD have some of my absolute favorite Loustat scenes that I can't wait to see adapted. I do expect Louis to remain as the lead love interest for Lestat and even if they introduce some of the other kinda/love interests I expect it to play out much differently.

If anyone is thinking that S3/4 is going to be like the QOTD movie.. that movie although entertaining on its own was a terrible adaptation. For one thing I was devastated that they completely left out Louis and the Loustat moments.

I'm not worried about Loustat or Louis being pushed aside. It's just not going to happen. If I'm wrong I'm wrong. But I just don't see it. Lestat becoming the lead narration now doesn't mean Louis is going to disappear from the show.

(Not @ you/anyone in particular but I keep seeing this worry coming up mostly from non book fans).

Yeah, no, it has been stated again and again that the show is built on Loustat - and the books are, as well.

Loustat are the corner stone. They have their difficulties, yes, they both are not ready at different stages... but when Louis finally goes to Lestat it is at that point that finally something lasting is built, and that is no coincidence? And it is no coincidence it concludes with them dancing and Lestat telling Louis he loves him either.

That is how the books end. Literally. Loustat is the foundation, their "dance", the "hurricane of their relationship" is what the books always return to. Louis is the one who hammers on the doors when Lestat is locked up by Maharet. Louis is the one who hold Lestat's hand when he is afraid. Lestat always comes back to Louis. It's always them.

And that is how it will be in the show as well, and I think latest after season 3. Oh, it won't be "happy ever after" then already, it isn't in the books... no. THEY are much more interesting than that, their dance a lot more tumultuous - them likening it to a hurricane was very apt :))))

And I cannot wait to see it.

[ghostlychief]

I'm not sure if you write for Blue team, but can you do relationship headcanons for them? If not, then relationship headcanons for John-117?

another master chief request for the books, LETS GOOOOO

(i decided to write headcanons for John) enjoy!! <3

---

Dating Master Chief (John 117) Headcanons

no warnings; just fluff

---

Dating John would feel like the calm after the storm, or like a consistent gentle rainfall that can’t help but ease you, quelling your worries

Dating John is calming like rainfall in the sense that you feel a sense of respite wash over you when you’re with him; being with him is also akin to that of the calming pitter-patter noise you hear when the rain comes; it’s never to harsh, or too loud; always a consistent rhythm

You feel a blanket of security wrapping itself around you tightly, never threatening to let you go when dating him; it’s solid and firm, just like John

You both were a bit shy when you first got together; no surprises there though, John leans more on the quiet side, and you, well, anyone would be a little timid when first dating a Spartan (they were genetically modified humans after all)

But John quickly made sure that you felt completely and utterly safe around him; he knew what he was capable of, and the last thing he wanted to do was ever scare you; and you appreciated that about him

It’s not like you are some scared little girl, afraid of Spartans, but, you know, they were the infamous Spartans you heard about growing up, you weren’t quite sure what to expect when you first met them (surprise, surprise Blue team all turned out to be lovely people)

You appreciated John’s understanding for the time it took for you fully get to know him, and be comfortable around him

In your early stages of dating, you guys mainly kept to public outings, like restaurants, movie theaters (yes Reach has a cinema), parks (you both enjoyed going on long walks together and you tease John about how his ‘normal’ walk is your jog)

You could say that he properly ‘wine and dined’ you, well as much as one can on Reach seeing that its operation is more so military and not just another regular planet

He was a gentleman: he opened doors for you, whether that be building, apartment, or car doors; it didn’t matter, he was there to open them for you; he also would sometimes place his hand at the small of your back, which sent sparks twinkling up your spine the first few times he did that (let’s be honest, you still feel giddy even now)

He was a great listener, always ready with a question (or 10) whenever you were telling him about your day, things that happened at work, the latest book you read. He always had a follow-up, always curious to know more about you, and what you’re thinking

You also were the same in that matter, always asking him questions; who could blame you though, his job was a lot cooler than yours

You were in awe of all the different planets and solar systems he’s been to (including the Halos) and you always picked his brain about the Covenant (you’ve been fortunate enough to not cross paths with the Covenant)

When John wasn’t on a mission, you weren’t at work, or you guys weren’t going on a “formal” date, you and John could be found lounging around one of your apartments, either reading, watching TV, doing puzzles, things like that

Sometimes you guys liked to do your own thing but in the company of the other

However, one of your favorite things to do is to nap with John

He’s so large that he generates a lot of body heat, so whenever winter rolls around and there’s snowflakes in the air, you loved to cuddle up with him on the couch, completely wrapped in his embrace and fall asleep with no worries on your mind (being with John made that easy)

John is the kind of partner who is a great shoulder to cry on; his support is endless for you, and he’s always there whenever you run into a problem; he’s there to listen about what’s troubling your life, but he’s not one to be pushy about how to fix it; no, he’s there for you, and makes sure to comfort you the best he can (which usually is you asking him for a hug, which he immediately complies with)

John gives the best hugs because 1) he is taller than you, so he can easily wrap you up tight and rest his head on yours, and 2) his arms are long and muscular, which makes his hugs 10x warmer and just better overall

Something that you quickly learned about John after a couple months of dating was that he was actually funny (right, like what are the odds a Spartan of his caliber has a funny bone?)

His humor was of course dry and sarcastic, but he got a laugh out of you every time he cracked a joke

Blue team also tells you stories about John (not to his knowledge) since they have known him since they were all pre-teens; sometimes you’ll bring something up to John, and he’ll be like “Where’d you hear that from?” (he wasn’t stupid he knew); and then a couple days later you’ll hear how hard John made training for them (oops)

Nevertheless, dating John has brought a sense of security into your life that you never thought you would feel, or have; you only hope is that you provide the same for him

(spoiler, you do)

[bluginkgo]

Just what in the fack did I watch... I'm gonna go watch it again just for funsies and to cry again (Rambles/Thoughts)

This post will mostly contain random rambles and thoughts I had while watching and rewatching the episode. And a lot of this is just going to be me ranting about scenes (the rants will most likely make you wanna go "Ginkgo, that's common sense we can see it smh." XD Just roll with it. Oh and NUzi scenes

Spoilers, duh and lots of words. Oh and gore warning? Kinda?

I mean... that scary *ss mother facking thing towards the end- you know what I'm talking about if you watched the ep 😅

First thing I found interesting, is how the Solver behaves in this scene. It's mere shadows, not even fully manifested. Further proves that the Solver transcends simple time and space, and is on a different plane of existence- a 4th dimension if you will.

The humans did, in fact, learn how to control the Solver. The pentagram like projections act as gravity enforcers and lights that subdue the solver for a period of time. Buuuut it seems that it's not full proof. It seems that this occurance is fairly common, seeing as the workers nearby were not very concerned that an eldrich being was about to break loose.

Alright another slow moment here. But I had to google wtf "MacGuffin" meant (English isn't my first language, so take it easy on me ;w;). And taking this straight from the google search "an object or device in a movie or a book that serves merely as a trigger for the plot." So most likely, the Absolute Solver is referring to the fact that Mitchell the intern set things in motion simply because he was mistaken for the real Dr. Chambers... Classic- CLASSIC human mistake XD

So... Heart/Nori. Something interesting is going on with her. I believe Nori WAS injured by the DDs and had to be finished off by Khan. I'll touch on Khan a bit later. But, just as seen with Eldrich J... I'm not sure why I've never thought of this before! It makes sense for Nori's corrupted core: Heart, to still function properly. Meaning, she could have snuck away when she was killed and returned to the cathedral to search for the crucifix. Uzi gets most of her style from Nori 🥹. Seems like Uzi got her mom's style and Khan's engineering abilities.

I had it all wrong- and I am ALL FOR IT! N wasn't afraid of something he saw ahead. He was upset with what they left BEHIND! V! And THIS ENTIRE SCENE

You cannot believe how surprised I was. This scene was so much better than I could have imagined it. Yes, it was painful to watch, but sweet robo-god this was executed SO DAM WELL TwT It was delicious angst. And Tessa was not in fact drawing her sword on Uzi, but instead protecting her... kinda... with an ulterior motive of course.

The gut wrenching betrayal right there. The animation team did a wonderful job at animating the betrayal and how it manifested in Uzi. Disbelief and then anger.

Not to mention her stumble. I hyper fixated on that stumble a bit too much on my first 2 watches. (Yes, I've rewatched the episode 8 times now, hush I love it XD). Her stumble shows weakness. And in that moment, she wishes to be anything BUT weak. The suspicion of betrayal is settling in, and she needs to be able to fight back. But her body is giving out. The events are taking a toll on her. And makes me appreciate the animation detail that much more.

This scene N is definitely angry. He's trying his best to keep it together and Tessa's pressure to injure and kill Uzi is not helping. So for him to be talking to Uzi, while glaring at Tessa is just him driving the point home. He is NOT going to hurt Uzi, no matter what they might find down in the labs.

But a poor choice of words that was. It gives Uzi a glimpse of what was actually happening and what has been bothering N. The trust vaporizes, and with it, any attempts with communication.

And what I believe, gives a nod back to ep2. As N steps in to try to help Uzi up, she retreats. Same happens in this episode. And the kicker? "Falling... for you" song starts lightly playing in the background.

This is far too comical after he says he deserves to have his limbs cut off. The whiplash I got from that is ridiculous... in a sad and funny way.

What an amazing shot. But it does paint a picture of what the DDs have done. Perhaps the blood also acted as cooling agents, and this is why the trend continued with robots- except this time around as oil. And this is what the Administration CYN most likely blocked out. Not only the manor time, but also the bloodbath that followed as Earth collapsed.

THE DOG MADE IT IN AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

It's interesting on how the solver manifests in the drones. It seems that Uzi's wings and tail, do not make the solver go insane, and she can continue to use it. However, later in the episode the same wings and tail go berserk. So it seems that once the transformation has set in- like with Uzi- it becomes part of the drone rather something that is manifested by the Absolute Solver's control.

SO MUCH TO UNPACK HERE XD Part 2A that Khan refers to is on the bottom left corner, the green core that Uzi got a hold of back in pilot episode- also titled as "I think this is a robot liver or something lol."

Plan B: Uzi could have had a normal gun if railgun didn't work. Bottom right corner

Top left corner under Uzi's railgun title: "30 min recharge time. That'll be fine." Famous last words ever XD

Top right corner: "Other things it can do: Not judge me, force prom dance, I can say I had friends but fricken murdered them with sci fi weaponry."

I love how sassy he is here XD His character development and arc is something that I will never forget. He has definitely come a great ways. Khan also seems adamant about his wife being completely dead. Which proves that he didn't know a single thing about the Absolute Solver and what it can do. He could only reference Nori's insane drawings and deduce that the planet was going to eat them all soon.

Idk if this is just my tired brain, but this comment felt like a joke to me. (Remember, I don't know anything about computers and the language ;w;) But the physical patch to save herself... as in, the same patches that are sent out for games/programs to fix bugs? That's the joke I got out of that one 😅

This entire sequence was something out of my nightmares XD The heel tapping that KEPT GETTING QUICKER definitely had me reeling back from the screen XD

The Nori and Yeva scene was so wholesome 🥹. I loved the way the animators showed their interaction. Despite the hellish events, they were still close.

My only issue with this image is, on what is Doll moving? Not like the floor. The core is gone from her body, what the heck is still driving her forward? Perhaps just on the sheer will to warn Uzi to "fight back." And I suppose I can see how she could still move without her main core. Almost acting like chickens do, when you cut their heads off. One was able to live for 18 months after the head was cut. So I suppose I can get behind the idea that Doll's final wish was to warn Uzi, at the very least, and thus forced the body to move until it did so.

But then, Tessa shows up. Which makes me wonder if she was the one that simply lead Doll's body to come to Uzi. How? Uhhh... Absolute Solver! Let's just go with that sweat face. The con in that theory is a simple: why? Why bother leading Doll to Uzi? To spook her? To give a false reason to attack Uzi? Given that N was still very much behind them all, I don't see why the Absolute Solver would try to make up some odd reason to attack Uzi. It could just simply... go ahead. There was no one there to fool, and could incapacitate Uzi easily. Buuuut I could also be looking too deep into this, as per usual.

Hey guess what.

I found the answer. XD Just as I'm typing this up, a frame popped up.

Yup, the core was still inside and thus running Doll and thus Doll could move, ok carry on. XD

Emotions spike the Absolute Solver, something that I love seeing and appears to be less headcanon and more canon at this point for me. Through the entire episode, the Solver keeps glitching out and forcing Uzi to lose control because in this situation, she's very stressed. A betrayal, a misunderstanding, learning about the past, everything becomes too much. This makes keeping the solver at bay that much harder.

He did NOT give her any chance. Yes or no, Tessa. That suddenness surprised me- in a good way. This shows how much N has grown. He's willing to stand up for his beliefs that much better. If he suspects something, he now acts on it, and does not wait for the other side to perhaps change his mind.

This scene. This scene shall live in my head rent free for a long while... Actually, the entire episode is gonna live rent free for a while. XD Not to mention the "Falling... for you" song plays in the background yet again. Ugh, pulling on heart strings there ;w;

They had us all fooled XD The hand lights were on just to trick us, and in fact were meant to be off this entire time! Oh you sneaky sneaky people. >w<

ALL OF THESE SCENES, they're all so cruel but SO GOOD TwT So cruel in context of how tortured N must be to fight Uzi, but so good in context that this fight sequence and animation is executed SO WELL. All of Nori's slaps were so personal XD Mama Nori educating NUzi

When I saw this scene, I couldn't help but think of ep3 and their dance. This entire episode is so bittersweet ;w;

She's still there TwT And she sees this entire fight. Of what she has become and done to N and omg I'm crying again. Moving on.

OMG YOU SILLY GOOBER BAHAHAHAHAHAHAH XD I love Nori/Heart's reaction, but the Absolute Solver also gets me laughing a bit too hard. "WHAT." That's so simple yet so effective. "What. Why. You are a DD I sent to kill the hosts, why are you hanging out."

The entire scene with NUzi screaming. Just. YES. What better way of gettin rid of stress than screaming! ^_^

Oh you sneaky, sneaky people. Well, all I can say, you got me. You got me good. This is something I didn't think of, but should have. It's simple to get these shots with certain rigs missing. And it was done seamlessly. Well done, well done. I begrudgingly applaud you. XD

HE'S PATTING HER HEAD AAAAHHHHH *proceeds to ascend to another realm*

They did not... omg they did XD Ah, yes, welcome a new horror oh and by the way here- :3 a cute face

Omg they look so cool- KHAN WTF XD

LOL J THE PRIOR HAZARD WARNING AHAHAHAHAHA

The way she shook his hand trying to snap him back to himself and wake up 😭. And the entire sequence following this... I'm just now slowly starting to process it, oh and great I'm sobbing again. Alright, moving on.

Well, I have some thoughts in this. This is personal thoughts, thus this is where you are more than free to yeet this section into the void that Uzi was dragged into... sorry that was a bad joke- anyways. "Die mad." I feel like this is her way of telling N to not give up. To go out there and FIGHT. But if he can't win, then to die like she is. To die in a way that he will be proud of and to go batsh*t crazy. Because by now, Uzi must know that all of their chances of survival are slim. So you might as well go out with a bang and "die mad."

Something I noticed and was further solidified when @bloodywolfwings also mentioned it. Uzi looks at peace here and very accepting of death. And I say, yes, she very much is. I think this was a way of her asking N for forgiveness. For getting mad at him in the beginning of the episode, for failing to be useful/protecting N, and for fighting against him- despite being possessed. And perhaps even, as an incredibly insane and radical thought, for loving him. This entire episode has put the characters and us through the wringer, and that "sacrifice" was just the cherry on top.

Something I have seen already mentioned once at very least (by @/rebecca-babe) and something that also put me on edge was the ending credits... or the lack of. Of course, all the credits roll, but it's not the usual type. Instead of an upbeat music that is either "Uzi the drone killer" or a theme that was seen in the episode... its SILENCE. Being a musician myself, I love how much love has been put into Murder Drones. The sound effects and the main music are always top-notch. But that ending unsettled me the most. The lack of all noise is something that is terrifying and unsettling in that ending. Almost like all the music and sound left with the "sacrifice" of the main character, Uzi. The entire episode was filled with sounds, silence only being present when something incredibly WRONG was happening - like at the beginning when intern Mitchell re-entered the cathedral. And as much as I love how well executed this entire scene was, I hated it. Because that scene does the job that it was set out to do. Put you on edge, and make you feel like all hope is lost. That this is it. This is the end.

This is the end of my rambles and thoughts that I had while watching ep7. I may have more later on as I keep rewatching this episode for the rest of the week ;w;

Want to hear more of my stupid rambles? This has 3 other parts!

[lizzie-queenofmeigas]

I'm sorry, but if you genuinely still can't understand the reasons for why people hated Elena so much, after all these years, then I'm afraid you're a lost cause. All the hate, backlash, and criticism Elena received was 100% justified and deserved. She's by far the worst and most boring, bland, vapid, weakest, useless, and worthless excuse of a main protagonist I've ever seen in any movie, show, book, and media. Nothing remotely interesting or compelling about her in the slightest. She has no personality or agency, and she contributed nothing whatsoever to the show. Her only personality and the only thing she contributed was going back and forth between two brothers, constantly whining and crying and playing the victim, and being a selfish, self-centered, and self-absorbed little twat that makes everything about her and thinks the world revolves around her. 

And before you use trauma as an excuse to defend her, I've seen plenty of other female characters from other shows and movies that have been through similar or worse things than Elena did, and they were a million times better and more likable than Elena could ever be. Stop using trauma and abuse as a weapon and to guilt people into changing their opinions about Elena. Don't pretend to give a shit about victims of abuse and trauma, when I don't see any of you extending that same grace to people like Caroline, Bonnie, Katherine, Rebekah, and Vicki, who have all been through shit too, and were far more interesting and better characters than Elena were. And you hate them for the exact same reasons, just like how a lot of you hate female characters in general for trauma and abuse they've been dealt. 

So, don't act so innocent when a lot of you villainize the hell out of Caroline for being the only character on the show that actually acted like an actual teenage girl, had believable flaws and imperfections, and was actually a lot more relatable than Elena was. And when you also villainize and victim blame/shame and slut shame her for the rape and abuse she suffered at the hands of Damon. You hate Caroline for rightfully hating her rapist and abuser, and not wanting Elena to be with him. But you don't hate Elena, who's supposed to be the best friend, and clearly has no shame sleeping with a rapist, knowing exactly what he did. Makes perfect sense. 

And I will most definitely always hate Elena for her decision to kill Kol, along with thousands and thousands of other vampires in his sireline. I don't care what Kol did, she will always be a straight piece of shit and a fucking cunt for that. And the audacity she had to be mad at Stefan for sleeping with Katherine and Rebekah, when she was flaunting the fact that she was sleeping with his abusive, rapist brother? Yeah, 100% FUCK HER! She has no say in who Stefan can and can't see. 

How Elena even has fans or people defending her is beyond me. If she wasn't such a bland bitch and had an actual personality and something to offer to the story and was just a decent person in general, then people would've actually liked her and rooted for her. But she was never leading lady material. That should've gone to Caroline or Katherine, mostly Katherine. But I'd do fine with Caroline too, she doesn't need a family legacy or nothing like that to lead the show. LITERALLY ANYTHING IS BETTER THAN ELENA!

Wow. Caroline stans are out of their minds.

No, Caroline doesn't act like a normal teenager. She acts like an entitled insensitive brat. I literally never met anyone who was like her, thank god for that.

Your hate for Elena seems irrational. I understand when people don't like her, but you take it a step further.

Good for you if you hate Elena and love Caroline, but you don't need to be interacting with someone who is the opposite.

[thefudge]

If I may dare ask what are your favourite romance novels?????

this will sound obnoxious, but i tend to love romance best when i encounter it in other genres (and i could definitely make a list of novels from different genres where the romance isn't the point but it goes so hard for me, and i think i have made some lists like that in the past? i really have to organize my books/book recs/book rec tags. and maybe make more lists)

but if we're going by novels that are considered and (could be) classified as romance, here's an imperfect list:

all of austen of course, but especially pride and prejudice and persuasion

jane eyre by charlotte bronte

the age of innocence by edith wharton

anna karenina by tolstoy (where i think i'm fonder of the kitty/levin pairing)

doctor zhivago by boris pasternak

gone with the wind by margaret mitchell (hate/love relationship but i am not immune to it, i'm afraid! i will say i prefer the book to the movie)

excellent women by barbara pym (god, i love the grumpy hero/heroine pairing here)

bridget jones's diary (the first book especially)

girl with a pearl earring by tracy chevalier (the movie too! colin firth and scarlett johansson had such good chemistry, it was surreal)

the blue castle by l.m. montgomery (love that we have a genuine "plain jane" heroine that doesn't turn out to be beautiful if she lets down her hair or any of that nonsense)

the french lieutenant's woman by john fowles (a postmodern romance, in many ways, but the yearning is so good)

spring snow by yukio mishima (i do think this is a romance, first and foremost, and my goddd, the angst and the yearning)

eligible by curtis sittenfeld (a modern p&p retelling; i know a lot of ppl hate this one but i really like it, though it could have been shorter. some of the lizzy/darcy moments in this book made my brain go brrr. the humor is great too)

sofia khan is not obliged (but just the first book in this series - another fun p&p retelling with a muslim heroine)

conversations with friends by sally rooney (i promised i wouldn't stretch the genre but this to me read as more of a romance than anything. and though i struggled with some parts of this book, i will admit that the affair between frances and nick did get to me. there were some particular sex scenes where rooney was doing what i like with the smut in terms of revelation and vulnerability)

the princess diarist by carrie fisher (okay, i'm doing it again, this is technically classified as memoir but again, the sections about harrison ford?? INSANE in terms of romantic anguish and angst. theee RPF of all time)

who's that girl by mhairi mcfarlane (some scenes in this book literally made my heart skip a beat?? this is a celeb/journalist romance that really worked for me. mcfarlane doesn't always strike the right chord with me but here, omgg. i hated her a bit for that ending, but some of the moments between the hero and heroine made me kick my feet like a lil kid)

birthday girl by penelope douglas (i don't know if i'd call this favorite, but it did the age gap thing right, while also being hot and well-written. it didn't toootally win me over, but i appreciate it when an author takes the "fell for my boyfriend's dad" trope seriously)

[breadvidence]

Please mind the #wineposting tag. Regardless: are you asking, "Should I watch this adaptation of Les Misérables?" I'll give you advice, though I suspect if you are reading this blog post you have watched all of these anyway (and quite possibly a few more, besides!).

'25 (Fescourt): Probably! If you are a Brick fan none of the adaptation choices will startle you, but having visuals to go with key scenes is a treat. This is a loyal piece. Toulout as Javert, Gabrio as Valjean, Milovanoff as Fantine, and Nivette as Éponine all give excellent performances. Be prepared for a lukewarm Cosette. You might struggle with silent film conventions, length, and French intertitles.

'34 (Bernard): Probably! This is a fairly loyal adaptation of the Brick that makes internally consistent choices where it deviates from its source (sometimes it has goofy continuity errors—politely ignore). Baur as Valjean and Gaël as Cosette give fabulous performances. Moments of silliness do not detract from the quality. Another long haul.

'35 (Boleslawski): Probably not. As an adaptation of Les Misérables this film is bad. That being said, Charles Laughton is a lauded actor, and you can't say he didn't put his whole laughussy into his performance. Because it is accessible and prominent, a lot of LM fans will have seen this film, and you might benefit from shared context if you're in fandom. Speaking personally, I'm glad I saw it, but I'm not sure you will be.

'52 (Milestone): No. Most likely based on '35 rather than on the book, this film is also a bad adaptation of Les Misérables. There are no notable performances. Because it is accessible, this is another adaptation many fans are familiar with, but understanding jokes about Valjean's boyfriend Robert and Javert's sentient hat probably don't justify sitting through the movie.

'58 (Le Chanois): No. Not the English dub, at least. "Bland" is the word of the day. Contemporary French audiences wildly disagree with me per Wikipedia.

'72 (Bluwal): Strong maybe. If you are an intense fan of the Brick, yes. Its use of a narrator to draw from the novel directly and its focus on the Amis makes this adaptation unique on this list. You might not end up liking it but you will have had an experience. If you have zero investment in Les Misérables but are still reading this post for some reason: no, do not watch this.

'78 (Jordan): At some point I will talk about this film and not make a gay joke but today is not that day. If you are not queer, get off my blog, you cis straight, begone. Everyone else: yes, watch this movie, c'mon. Perkins. That performance. At some point I need to make a serious post about queerness and '78 but right now all I've got is Javert's literal on-screen boner. Jesus Christ. Not a great adaptation of the novel but a virtuoso example of unintentional homoeroticism.

'82 (Hossein): No. This is an odd little adaptation without the charisma of a '35 or '78, somehow not as bad as either of those but not as good either. The GIF of the Amis walking in heavy wind is the best this film has to offer.

'98 (August): No—but I stared into my wine glass for a long, long time before typing those two letters. If we are judging adaptations by how they handle the source material, this is a disaster. As a film? I'm sure entertained. I call it bitchslap Les Mis. I should note here I am also a huge fan of Uma Thurman. Possibly I should recuse myself. I don't know, pal. IDK.

2012 (Hooper): I dwell bitterly on the fact that this is our film version of the musical. Brick fans are restless, musical fans are restless. People who first encountered Les Mis via this version are making feral noises. I'm afraid. I'm moving on.

2018 (Davies): It's really unfortunate that I am at my most drunk while commenting on this adaptation. Sure, watch it, it's one of those BBC series that has watchability sheerly because of production value and proximity to contemporary narrative/film expectations/standards. Personally I hate it. My partner is so tired of the tone in which I utter the syllables "Oyelowo".

The Musical: yes c'mon. Bootleg that good bitch.

[shanastoryteller]

same anon and I’m just curious—- are you a fan of barnet newman?

(even if you’re not, you write beautifully about it)

mmmmmm fan is probably a strong word, at least it would have been before i wrote the fic. i actually only knew who’s afraid of red, yellow, and blue iii before writing ta'burni, i didn't even know the print in the iron man 2 was a newman before i googled it. i sort of went backwards with this

i thought that scene of tony taking down the art to replace with iron man pop portrait and pepper getting mad would be better if it was metaphorical. so i decided that the art would be something meaningful between pepper and tony and him taking it down to replace was something pepper would see as tony putting iron man before them and everything they've been through together and tony would see it as him accepting that his legacy was going to be iron man and the merchant of death and not any sort of family he could build with pepper because the palladium was going to kill him before he got that chance. and then i googled what the print was and did some research into newman to see what i could make out of this. luckily, it was newman, so he lends himself to the sort of metaphor i needed rather well. and then i didn't even include that scene in the fic rip

that being said, i do like his work a lot, and i like what he was trying to do and what he was trying to say and how that expressed itself in his pieces. i think a lot of modern/abstract art is context reliant and now that i have context i am a fan

i'm probably about to make an ass of myself here, because i really have zero qualifications to have any opinions about art besides that occasionally i like to look at it. i haven't even taken an art history course

i think a huge barrier to people being able to really appreciate modern art is that society is heavily reliant on self contained art and it's the kind pretty much everyone has experience with. with books and movies and music, they are designed to stand on their own. context never hurts, and can add, but the understanding and enjoyment of these mediums should not be context dependent. if they are, then these works are considered bad. it's a sign of bad artistry to require context in these mediums

then there's, you know, fields and portraits and depictions of history and myth. context always adds, but you can look at almond blossoms or saturn devouring his son and you see a complete picture. you can appreciate artistry without any understanding of what's being depicted or why and knowing why doesn't even necessarily improve the experience. is almond blossoms a different piece now that i know it was intended for a nursery? to some, maybe, but to most, no.

so you have modern art, abstract art, performance art, ect, and you need context. context is half the piece. sometimes the whole piece. it's like seeing two earthlings without knowing the title and going, yeah, that's a nice painting, and then seeing the title and getting that little oh of connection to a species that's been dead for longer than humanity has been alive. and that's not even abstract art! that's a painting fully capable of standing on it's own merits even without the gut punch of context

portrait of ross in la is incomprehensible without knowing that ross died of aids. unfinished painting (1989) is something you can look at and go, okay, that's a piece of art, but without the context that it's basically a the self portrait of keith haring's life, also cut short by aids, do you really understand the art? is it hitting?

is tableu i anything more than straight lines and crayola color paint if you don't go a little deeper and go, maybe this is the start to every artist's journey, maybe this is every stray thought i corral and put into place and attempt to explain?

i think a lot of people stop at "i don't get it" and then shy away because either they think the art is bad or that they're stupid and they want nothing to do with either. but "i don't get it" should prompt exploration, it should prompt a search for explanation. not only in art, but in life. "i don't get it" in history, art, politics, science should always be the start of a journey, not a destination, but a lot of the most commonly consumed art accidentally trains people to reach "i don't get it" and give up

newman is so earnest with his work that i even if i hated every single one of his lines then i could still not help but love it

i do wish that instead of trying (and miserably failing) to restore who's afraid of red, yellow, and blue iii they had just let it hang, destroyed, all three slashes on prominent display

shakespeare's soliloquies were originally a type of call and response, because back in the day audiences were not as quiet and well behaved as they are today

the audience heckling the actors were no more authors than the guy who vandalized newman's work is an artist

however, that being said

who's afraid of red, yellow, and blue? this massive canvas of mostly red calls out

the response: three long slashes, rage and fury and fear in every one of them

claiming bravery, but proving cowardice

and it would have been better than letting some idiot go over it with a damn paint roller

[thenightling]

Someone finally asked me the golden question. How would I have handled Universal's Dark Universe.

Disclaimer: If someone sees this and likes my ideas, you may use them for free. No consultation or acknowledgement required. Just do justice to my boo boys.

Well, I would stop so blatantly trying to make it the MCU. It's not the MCU. And don't be afraid of a little camp. These are the classic monsters after all.

Time period. Start in the past and then WORK your way to the present. Don't force all of it to be set in the present from the get go. Let the audience feel and understand these are immortal beings. You can even make it a surreal, timeless, fairy tale-like setting that just resembles the nineteenth century. Most people use generic medieval for fantasy settings but Gaslamp fantasy is a thing.

2. Start with the most well-known of the monsters. Do Dracula. It can be a book faithful adaptation, or something along the lines of Bela Lugosi or Frank Langella. I think general audiences like Dracula to be fierce and predatory but also somewhat romantic, that's why the Mina / Dracula romance has endured even though it deviates heavily from the novel. So let Dracula be romantic but do something unexpected and fresh with it.

Honestly I'd love an adaptation of Fred Saberhagen's The Dracula Tape (Dracula retold from Dracula's point of view). But I know they'd want to stick with the public domain version.

Let Dracula have his literary powers to take wolf, bat, and mist form, and conjure storms. Let him be able to walk by day but not able to shapeshift by day. Bela Lugosi's version didn't actually burn in the sun until the sequels anyway and that was only from mimicking Nosferatu (1922).

Either leave out the reincarnated wife concept all together or let the reincarnation be someone other than Mina. Dr. Van Helsing (a male or female version) or even Jonathan Harker could make for an interesting twist. Lots of depictions of Dracula are bisexual now and this would be something fresh for the universal version.

3. When doing Frankenstein stop trying to recreate the Karloff version "for modern audiences." Let's try the literary version for a change. Long black hair, no neck-bolts or green skin, let him be articulate. And don't go for "steampunk action figure. " (I'm looking at you, Van Helsing.)

Let each classic monster have their own setting and time period. Dracula gets 1891 since that's when his novel takes place, unless you do a fifteenth century origin or fifteenth century flashbacks in the nineteenth century. Frankenstein is late eighteenth century or very early nineteenth century.

You can get more free with the concept if you do a Frankenstein sequel. Think 1985's The Bride but the male creature is intelligent and articulate too.

4. With Wolfman go old school. Practical effects in the style of Rick Baker. Get Guerrero del Toro involved with these somehow. That man knows how to handle classic monsters. Remember the rules, and acknowledge that he's mostly immortal and can regenerate. Everyone forgets this.

5. Have Danny Elfman do the music. I know he's already doing the Dark Universe park music but let him do ALL the music. Trust the man. Have you heard his score to Sleepy Hollow? Just let him do his thing.

6. Don't treat each film like a commercial for the next or hinted team up. Just let the films be able to stand on their own at first. That's how the Uniersal Monster movies started originally. You can let one or two characters turn up in multiple films but don't be ham fisted about it like with some of what was in 2017's The Mummy.

7. When you finally do allow the team up go watch the Asylum's Monster Mash (2024) first.

I'm serious. Hell, buy the movie from The Asylum to do a high budget remake but add about twenty minutes to it so The Creature from the Black Lagoon can be added too. It's cheesy but its fun. Let them be dysfunctional would-be heroes. Let have What we do in the Shadows-like moments without being too cynical and insulting and mocking the very idea.

By this point you already made the monsters scary but with some potential for redemption, compassion, and tenderness. Let them organically evolve from brooding villains and anti-heroes to surprisingly competent heroes but let it happen organically.

You can even get organic diversity. The mummy is from Egypt (North Africa), the witch is Roma (and possibly a previous lover of Dracula's daughter), The Creature from the Black Lagoon is from South America, etc. Again, get Guillermo del Toro involved. The Shape of Water was pretty much Creature from the Black Lagoon with a happy ending for The Creature anyway. An Abe Sapien-esque version of The Creature from the Black Lagoon would be great.

I forgot to say who the main antagonist would be in my version of The Dark Universe. Possibly a mad scientist like Doctor Moreau, Doctor Pretorius, or a faction of vampires who want to dethrone Dracula from his self-appointed title as king of the vampires. There's nothing in Stoker's novel or the Universal movies that claim he's the first vampire but he's commonly depicted as king of the vampires simply because no one had thought to unite and lead all of them until him.

[jordanrosenburg]

Argylle - A Breath of Fresh Air

**Spoilers Ahead**

I just got back from seeing Argylle with a friend. I knew I had wanted to see it because I like a lot of the actors in it, but I had seen the trailer so many times that I felt like I had already watched it.

That trailer couldn't have prepared me for the unadulterated fun I was about to have. Every other line out of Sam Rockwell's mouth was laugh out loud funny. What kept me drawn in, though, was the editing. The splices between Rockwell and Cavill was seamless. I know with modern technology, they easily could have greenscreened a lot of it, but it still must have taken a while to film all the same fight scenes in the same exact way to make the cuts as seamless as they were.

The score and soundtrack were brilliant. Between the funky tunes used for the fight scenes, and the dramatic notes used during what would be dramatic in a regular spy thriller, had me enjoying every minute. I will be looking up the soundtrack playlist on Spotify and listening repeatedly.

Henry Cavill is no stranger to playing a spy. In between Superman movies, Cavill starred in The Man from U.N.C.L.E. The latter was another movie that didn't mind being silly and wasn't afraid to have its comedic moments. Because Cavill has played so many daring roles over the years, where he's been the hero or the brute or even just the eye candy, he was the perfect fit for Argylle. You can tell he was having a blast, and not taking things too seriously. The audience isn't supposed to take it seriously either. The Argylle books in the movie are a personification of how cheesy those sorts of books and movies can be. The eye-rolling puns, the use of a femme fatale, and crude jokes.

Back in the day, that's how most James Bond movies were. They had their serious moments, but Bond was a cheeky spy who liked to fuck and crack wise with his villains. He was suave and sure of himself and a badass. But there was a transition in the 90's when the Austin Powers movies started rolling out. Now, I'm a huge fan of Austin Powers movies, I'll watch them any time, any place. But those movies, being replicas of the old Bond films but with more humor, outlandish sex, and over the top puns, made it difficult for the new Bond films to be silly. Suddenly, they were getting more and more serious, with more and more over the top action scenes and explosions.

Argylle brought back the silliness and the goofiness, and the ability to laugh at itself. Suspension of disbelief, etc etc. Sometimes you just need to sit back and let yourself enjoy the ride. Throughout the film, as the layers kept being peeled back, I kept thinking, "What is this movie?!" I can usually figure out what's going to happen, but the twists and turns in this film kept throwing me off, and that kept me in my seat and having fun.

There's a scene where Bryce Dallas Howard's character, Elly, thinks she's seen her parents die in cold blood. Rockwell is driving her somewhere in the south of France, and he asks her if she's okay. Howard, astonished, asks, "Am I okay? Am I okay?!", and then she started crying. This made me lean over to my friend and say, "all of us @ Elmo the other day", and we burst into hysterics. (If you're unfamiliar, Elmo's X account posted asking how everyone was, and there was a surge of responses of people using memes to show how not well they all are.)

A little more than halfway through, we find out that Elly's real name is Rachel Kyle. She had gotten into a bad accident on a spy mission and had no memory. The bad guys brainwashed her into thinking she was someone else, and it worked. The Argylle books she wrote as Elly, were really just memories coming back to her. We were made to believe her books were predicting future events, but really, it was the past. Samuel L. Jackson explained that to her. Rockwell then had to calm Howard down and get her to settle into the information. Slowly, Rachel remembers who she is. She hasn't lost all of Elly, but she makes it seem like she has in order to complete the overall mission.

Rockwell thinks that Howard has double crossed her, but in a very Knives Out fashion, she explains that she knew if she shot him in the chest in just the right spot, he wouldn't die. We learn that the two were lovers back in the day. Not only did he feel betrayed, but he was heartbroken. Later on, she double crosses the bad guys, finds her cat, then finds a room with all the weapons she could possibly need to get out. Rockwell finds her there, and they're able to hash things out. She assures him that they're on the same side.

This leads into one of the most incredibly choreographed fight scenes I've ever seen. You can tell the actors were having an incredible time. Smoke pours into the corridor and the two come out shooting. While throwing in body rolls and other dance movements, they take everyone out. This also included Howard lifting Rockwell up, much like how Dua Lipa was lifted up during the beginning of the movie by Henry Cavill, spread eagle. The shots used every time there was a lift like this was not subtle. We get it, it's an innuendo for sitting on someone's face. And it was funny every single time.

Then the next fight scene happened, which gave Howard a moment to shine. They were trapped in a room that was slowly filling with oil, so they couldn't shoot their guns. She remembers she's actually good at ice skating, and puts together makeshift skates. She sticks a knife into a gun, then rushes out like a hockey player. I thought I was going to pass out from laughing so hard. It was the perfect mix of hockey style skating and figure skating. Were these scenes filled with CGI and body doubles? Yes. Did it make them less fun? Absolutely not.

Everything works out in the end because of course it does. Her ending is given to Argylle and Wyatt. Personally, I think Henry Cavill and John Cena should have kissed, they were clearly in love. I thought they would have since Rockwell and Howard kissed. All of the scenes paralleled one another, so why couldn't that one? I digress.

For one last big laugh, at the end of the movie, Howard is back to pretending to be Elly the author, and is doing a book reading of the final Argylle book. She's taking questions from the audience, and she calls on a man. He stands and knowingly smiles. It's Henry Cavill, only he has a curly mullet and a southern accent. What is it with British actors and doing southern accents that brings me so much joy? He says, "I don't have any questions, but I'm sure you have a couple for me", and winks.

There was a post-credits scene. It was supposed to be the actual Argylle book's first film adaptation. The scene takes place in a bar called The King's Man. An Easter egg thrown in by director, Matthew Vaughn, who has also directed the 2021 film by the same name. We couldn't tell if it was serious or not, but I'd love to see a movie based off the fake books. I think mostly because the writer, Jason Fuchs, and Matthew Vaughn, should definitely team up again.

Even though there were parts reminiscent to other spy movies, this is one of the most creative movies I've seen in a while. This is my favorite kind of satire. There are so many movies that are just remakes of remakes of remakes these days. It feels like there are no original ideas left. So, this was a breath of fresh air. It was so funny and so brilliant with a star studded cast. I bet this movie was so fun to work on, you could just feel that energy radiating from the actors. There were some slower parts, but that's to be expected. For the most part, my attention was kept. It was one of those movies where I left thinking, "I can't wait for this to come to streaming so I can watch it again".

I don't think Howard is the strongest actor, and some of the plot between the good spies and the bad spies was a little confusing. I found a lot of that hard to follow, maybe that was supposed to be on purpose. Most spy movies aren't always clear on what the main issue is.

Anyways, if you're looking for an escape from the cold, or an escape in general, this is definitely the movie to see.

[the-algebra-thing]

ok so if you couldn't tell I'm rewatching the howl's moving castle movie bc I want to be reading the book but I have crafts to work through for decorations for my friends bridal shower in two days. so I haven't got past chapter 5 in my reread but I put on the movie—in subtitles, which I've never done before, bc it was all I could find for free—and I am just a little mind boggled. firstly I didn't realize how staunchly on the side of the book I had become despite loving this movie so much for so many years, and secondly . I'm feeling. I don't know.

like I don't want to cry misogyny but it feels kinda shitty that while the book was about secrets and truth and selflessness and knowing yourself and trusting yourself and all that shit right, because. in the book sophie's image of herself as incapable and unworthy has little to do with her looks and a lot to do with her birth and her responsibilities and what she sees as her lot in life. and howl's image of himself as capable and worthy and beautiful and a lady-killer is part of a web of lies he layers on top of one another to keep himself from being afraid, which ends up leaving his conscience wrapped up in countless layers and barely visible to the naked eye. and eventually sophie learns she has innate magical power, embraces this and strikes out on her own, and comes to love howl in spite of what she tells herself is supposed to happen to her. and all of howls lies eventually run themselves out, and at the end of the book he's stripped of his defenses and has to learn to stand in one place and take what comes anyways. and he comes to love sophie without even thinking much about it, without his beauty spells at all.

in the movie howl is still a self obsessed freak but his Heart Of Gold is put on display immediately, and sophie's self-worth issues are displayed almost exclusively in her bitterness at not being beautiful while her unshrinking personality that's supposed to show itself when she gets spelled is completely back burnered. she has very little presence compared to the captivating and hilarious personality she has to offer in jones' book. in the movie she's very anxious following the transformation, instead of it registering mostly as the weight of the life she had assigned herself off her shoulders, and the complexity of her motivations that you experience through the internal monologue in the book is almost completely flattened into aw man . I sure wish I was beautiful. this is really scary that there's a spell on me. her bold temperament is displayed as somewhat of a second thought, while we get to watch howl be full of righteous indignation and tired wisdom at the state of the warring world outside. to be fair I'm only halfway through the movie but in terms of the books contents we're actually right where I left off in chapter five out of twenty one, and jones had no trouble at all establishing a really good framework for all that I've described by then. I'm so much more disappointed than I expected to be goddamn

[frodothefair]

hello!! I have a few questions about hobbit relationships. For one, I've read a lot of stuff where people say that hobbit's aren't shy and have a couple partners in their lives, but I've also gotten the impression that they can be sort of conservative and private about their love lives, what would your take be on this? Would they like public displays of affection? Would they keep it in their smials? And, courting rituals/things considered romantic, what do you think that would look like? I've read that going on walks and eating food/feeding each other are pretty classic for hobbits, and also building gardens are pretty big proposals/wedding gifts, are there any other traditions you headcanon or have seen yourself? Thank you so much for having this, it helps a lot;-; expect to see more of me in the future lol!

💐 ASK ME about my headcanons about hobbits and the Shire! 💐

Ah, dearest gentle reader! Welcome to my inbox! I am so glad you have found your way to my humble abode. Have a seat, have some tea and seed cake, and make yourself at home, for in honor of the new season of Bridgerton, we shall talk about love, courtship, and marriage in the Shire! (@konartiste, I think you'll enjoy the Bridgerton parallels)

First things first. I base what I imagine to be true on Tolkien's own portrayal of the hobbits as a caricature of British country dwellers in the early 20th century. I will derive my answers from both book-canon and movie-canon.

Let’s begin with your question about whether hobbits are shy and conservative. If we go off the early 20th century rural Britain hypothesis, then the answer is yes and no. There are certainly higher standards of propriety than we are used to in our society; however, by dint of being rural and closer to the earth so to speak, they are more relaxed than, say, the denizens of a city like Minas Tirith. For instance, premarital sex is generally frowned upon, but since there are many cozy barns, haystacks, and woods, as well as dark corners in sprawling smails, you can bet that it happens anyway, and everyone knows it, but does not speak of it except in whispers.

Similarly, there is friendship and courtship, and men and women share many daily tasks and mingle easily, but there is nothing like casual dating as we understand it. Courtship almost always has marriage in mind -- which is why Rosie was unhappy with Sam for making her wait so long: if you do not see yourself marrying someone, you simply remain friends or move on, and it is improper and disrespectful to do otherwise. In addition, with regard to public displays of affection, there are at least two instances of hobbits kissing in public in The Lord of the Rings and The Hobbit movies, so walking hand in hand and a light kiss here and there are probably acceptable, but certainly nothing more than that -- or else the old ladies minding their carts at the market will have a thing or two to say to your momma. (Pronounced mom-MAH).

Now, speaking of mommas, let's move on to the topic of marriage.

Based on Tolkien's family trees in the appendices of Lord of the Rings, it seems that hobbits marry only once, since there are no documented remarriages that I know of, and since hobbits are hardy and live long lives in a peaceful land of plenty, young widows and widowers are likely rare. So to answer your question about whether hobbits have multiple partners, I'm afraid I don't know where that notion comes from. Certainly, it is likely that they court multiple people in search for a love match, but it seems that once they marry, they typically marry for life. Indeed, hobbit marriages are often so successful precisely because they marry for love. Everyone in the Shire, even those of more modest means, generally have everything they need, and hobbits are not overly ambitious, so marrying for resources or protection or to climb the social ladder is not very common -- at least, those are not the main reasons for getting married, but rather a nice side-benefit.

That said, however, marriage is still considered a boon and a virtue, and most hobbits seek to get married, with bachelors and spinsters being uncommon. (Tolkien said so himself). As a result, there is something of a thriving marriage mart in the Shire, to help along those who are unable to find a mate by their own means.

The marriage mart, of course, is a far cry from that of Bridgerton in its glamor, but it does consist of a network of well-meaning mommas who talk among themselves and decide which young people might make a good match, and seek to introduce them to one another. This may involve inviting the prospective partner and their parent(s) over for tea, and having the young people socialize in that setting first, and as time goes on, encouraging them to spend more time together. In addition, the selfsame mommas often organize dinners, dances, and other festivals around Midsummer, the Harvest Festival, and Yule, and those lively occasions are unofficial opportunities for young people to dance, eat, and meet partners they would not otherwise encounter.

In general, there are three social classes in the Shire -- with the distinction between them being not-too-rigid: the working class (people like the Gamgees and the Cottons, who work the land or have a trade), the middle-class (families like the Bagginses: wealthier, conformists, may be involved in more intellectual work such as law or medicine) and the upper/ruling classes (the Tooks and Brandybucks, roughly equivalent to titled nobles, who can be as quirky as they please). Each class has its own events, and while they are not strictly segregated and it is not uncommon for the likes of Bilbo of the Old Took to have a party and invite everyone, there is generally more mingling between the upper and middle classes, and they are correspondingly more likely to marry each other.

Now, when it comes to courting on the way to marriage, there are two ways that it might begin..

At times, there is a parent (usually a momma) putting forth a child as a candidate for courtship, in which case there is the custom of inviting a prospective partner and their parent (again, usually a momma) to a meal at one's house -- or coming over to their house with food. The party initiating the courtship is the one who brings the food, and usually it is made by the prospective partner to showcase their skills as a potential spouse. After that, the other party is expected to reply with an invitation in kind -- or not. If they don't wish to court any further, they simply send a kind thank you note, but no reciprocal invitation. That way, everyone is on the same page, but nobody loses face.

And then, on the other hand, there is the self-initiated courtship, which is generally less structured. The only universally accepted signal is to ask your prospective partner to Go For A Walk. Being asked for a walk is the equivalent to being asked on a date in our world, and can generally be initiated by either party, though men are of course more often the ones to make the first move. Of note, the walk by definition cannot have a specific destination, except after a few "ordinary" walks, the courting couple might choose to have a picnic -- this would be the equivalent of going on a fancy dinner in our world. A walk with a picnic at its conclusion may also accompany milestone events, such as anniversaries or a formal marriage proposal.

Which brings me to our last topic -- the question of engagements and weddings. This can certainly be a post onto itself, so I'll try to keep it brief. I certainly agree that a garden can be an excellent engagement or wedding present, but in addition to this, hobbits do usually exchange smaller gifts of some kind as a token of their commitment: most often pieces of jewelry, either heirloom or made to order. This transcends all social classes. In general, hobbits do not use rings, because they do use their hands quite a bit at the very least for cooking, but choker style necklaces for women, and bracelets or lapel pins for men are quite common. As for the family's wedding presents, both sides strive to help the young couple set up house, and the wedding planning is a collaborative effort. Weddings generally take place in the summer, since a mass of flowers is nothing short of obligatory. Gifts are formally presented and speeches abound, and one challenge that comes with "unequal" marriages is that one side may be embarrassed if their gifts seem paltry in comparison. As a result, it is not uncommon, if there is an unequal marriage, for the more wealthy side to give the less wealthy side some funds to get more suitable gifts.

(As a fun bonus and a shameless plug, check out this excerpt my fic about the Shire's efforts at matchmaking Frodo!)