#I just. Am very jumpy and have had bad experiences with em

[raynavan]

I was a bit to tried to mention this last night, but when I was drawing that picture, it was in a like. A Pitch black room. I also had music on so I couldn’t really hear anything, so. THIS GUY

THIS FELLA RIGHT HERE

GAVE ME MULTIPLE HEART ATTACKS

there is something quite startling about a thing suddenly Being There. I could only hear them when they were like. Right Next To Me and that was also when I could hear them. Decidedly not cool.

[satsuki2406]

Dear Aomi Bakugou Katsuki x Reader

"I've seen you in a dream before, you are the warm and bright presence that embraced me on Cape Kamui a long time ago on a June afternoon."

Shinohara (Y/N) is a normal girl who had everything she could ask for, a loving family, a beautiful home, friends, and a fluffy cat. For a long time, she gave her life and happiness for granted, never imagining that she'll face one of the worst and crueler facades of society so closely, destroying what once was a happy, harmonious and normal family. One day, in hopes to recover what they lost, the Shinohara family took one of the more difficult decisions of their lives; leave behind their home back in Hokkaido and travel hundreds of miles south until Musutafu, the place that could grant them a solution and help close the yet fresh wound and scare away the ghosts of the past. Hardheaded, passionate, and ambitious (Y/N) is forced to confront the incarnated face of the superhuman society that she hated the most; Bakugou Katsuki.

PAIRING: (Bakugou Katsuki x Reader)

GENRE/WARNINGS: Romance, Fluff, Angst, Dark Themes, My poor attempt of humor, Strong language (Courtesy of King Lord Explosion Murder God *********💥), Manga Spoilers.

STATUS: On going

Chapter 1: School is a Great Place to Make Enemies

Chapter 2: My Stupid Classmate, The Angry Dandelion

Chapter 3: In Conclusion, This Day Was...

Chapter 4: Welcome to the Neighborhood 

Masterlist \(￣︶￣*\))

✒A/N:

OH-EM-GEE-

It's really been a while since I updated this story, I really thought it was a couple of months ago, I’ve been very busy lately and just kept pushing writing for later, and later transformed into 8 months! I had to admit that I also had a huge block with this story, but recently I got a lot of inspiration and energy, chapter 6 is almost ready but editing needs to be done after all. Hopefully this would be a good one! There’s more details coming in future chapters and also new characters! I got a thing for OCs recently, I feel they add more personality to the story!

Enjoy!

o(*°▽°*)o

5: Aldera Chronicles

‘Just a good day’ That was what you prayed, asked for last night, and what you tried to repeat to yourself to keep calm and serene while you looked desperately for your earphones. As soon as you did, you connected them to your phone and searched for the loudest song you kept in your collection.

“Oi! I’m talking to you dumbface!”  

The loudest one of all.

After the whole ‘neighbors fiasco’ you got stuck with Bakugou on your way to school, both of your mothers insisted that you should go to school together at least today, so you could ‘amend your differences and get closer’ you almost gag at the suggestion, but your mom looked so ecstatic about the idea of you making new friends, after all she hasn’t looked that excited in a while, so you could not find yourself saying no to her.

Although you ‘accepted’, that didn’t mean that you will stay with him all the way to school, right now you were still in their field of vision, so if you left him behind, they will notice. You were just waiting for the perfect moment, as soon as you made it to the end of the street and turned to the left, you will take that as a cue to hop on your bike and leave him behind eating your dust.

“What a shity morning, stuck with this idiot. That friking hag threaten me to change the wifi password if I didn’t come and to top it off, she had the fucking nerve to take my phone, fan-fucking-tastic…” Bakugou was right in front of you grumbling angrily and throwing profanities left and right. His anger was more than evident; he was more hunched over than normal; his hands were way deeper in his pockets to the point you thought he could rip them open and his feet were stomping on the ground with such intensity that you could almost feel it vibrate under your own.

Despite the fact that you could not see his face, you could bet your (F/C) post-its that there was an extra deep scowl and curled pouty lips ‘decorating’ his face right now. You tried to distract yourself with your phone and avoid Bakugou as much as possible, it was bad enough to spend more time with him than you already did in school, not to mention that unwanted encounters may become commonplace being next-door neighbors.

You sighted dejected at the thought, you really were kind of excited about moving to a new city, Musutafu was way bigger than Sapporo was, with bigger malls, parks, shops, restaurants and more fun things to do. But sadly for you, Bakugou manage to crush your hopes and expectations as soon as he opened his mouth, hell, even by existing actually.

Your attention was snaped back to reality when the sound of cars passing by and other students came to you. You got on your bike again, getting in front of Bakugou so you could reach the avenue faster, “Oi! Don’t go in ahead of me dumbshit!” You ignored him as he yelled at you, his words more and more inaudible as you got farther.

After a few minutes you had lost him completely, he probably went the opposite direction to the bus stop or the train station, Aldera was close, but not enough to go walking, you did it there in twenty five minutes with your bike if you took your time, fifteen if you were in a rush, you made sure to verify how long it would take you to get there the days prior that you had to actually go back to school.

You decided to relax and enjoy the view of the city and listen to your favorite songs like the day before. Luckily the Tatooine Station was open, safe and working at its fullest.

“Not a single villain in sight, phew, how good that they managed to clear the area otherwise I would have had to…” Suddenly memories of your crossing trough Dump Beach™ came to you, that was an experience you were so willing to don’t repeat ever again. “I wonder who else from my school had to make a detour like me yesterday, or if someone was involved in the incident… those ladies said it was a middle schooler, but it’s quite ambiguous data to make any conclusive statements, there are hundreds of middle schools in Musutafu and the commercial district is in the center, so it could be anyone.”

You stopped in front of a crosswalk, waiting for the light to change. ‘I’ll ask Midoriya if he knows something else, he probably passed by or something’. You had to admit that you were kind of excited about the idea of befriending the green head, even with his nervous, anxious, jumpy and shy personality he gave you a kind and sweet vibe. His insecurity gave away his true nature; his clumsiness, the nervousness, overanalyze everything, the mutter, for some they could be annoying but you found it rather and oddly fascinating, it made him feel real, genuine and honest.

‘He’s almost like…’

The chirping sound of the traffic light snapped you out of your rampant thoughts announcing that the light had finally turned green. You started off with your bike along the rest of the pedestrians and continued on your way to the school.

The rest of the way to Aldera passed without any hitch, you left your bike locked and took your stuff to walk to the shoe lockers like yesterday, just a few feet ahead you distinguish a very familiar mop of green curly hair. He seemed slightly hunched and deep in thought, probably way too deep in thought to the point that you could see a colorful smeared aura surrounding him and the word mutter coming out of his mouth. And you were not the only one, as you could see the people around walking away, with slightly perturbed expression on their faces. You just took it as a cue to let your presence being known.

“Good morning Midoriya!” You hopped by his side and greeted him enthusiastically. The poor thing almost had a heart attack and jumped out of his own skin as you just scared the shit out of him. He released a muffled scream and seem to calm down a tiny bit to immediately turn the shade of a tomato and babble a greeting.

“G-G-G-G-G-Good mo-morning Shinohara-san! You-You-You caught me by su-surprise.” He squeaked as he covered his face with his arms and his eyes moved erratically to look everywhere but you.

“Did I scare you? I’m sorry! I guess I let myself go a little bit.” You trailed, resting a palm against your nape.

“Oh nonono! Please don’t apologize! Y-Y-You were been courteous after all. He whispered breathlessly at the end fidgeting his fingers nervously. “I…nobody ever greets me or says good morning, I didn't expect it and that's why I got a little nervous. T-That’s all, so don’t worry.” His little confession shocked you for a moment, it was really depressing to be honest but it motivated you at the same time.

You beamed confidently at him, “Well Midoriya, I recommend that you get used to it then, because I intend to greet and say goodbye to you every day without fail from now on.”

He looked up at you with a surprised and somewhat puzzled expression, his fingers started to twitch nervously, his countenance became even redder if that was even possible.

“B-B-B-B-B-But Shi-Shinohara-san-!”

“Shush, shush, shush! I am not going to put it up for discussion this is how it’ll be from now on and it's over.” You placed your hands on your hips, a slight scowl adorning your face to accentuate your mock annoyance. “Besides, who will run away from Bakugou with me after I tell him how much of an asshole he is for the umpteenth time in a row?”

You relaxed your demeanor again, offering him a goofy smile, so he could notice that you weren't even mad to begin with. The poor greenette thought for a smidgen that he made you angry and that worried him profusely. But one glance at you told him that you were being sincere, he was scared that you could be trying to play a prank just to make fun of him as it has already happened to him so many times. that alien feeling of relief and tranquility invaded his chest, apparently the chance encounter he had with his childhood hero had been a good omen and brought him more good things that he could imagine.

His eyes teared up with hope and a squiggly smile adorned his face, he dried his tears with his gakuran sleeve and clenched his fists excitedly.

“So, what do you think?” you asked eagerly.

“I look forward for it!”

.

.

“Did you see what happened yesterday at the commercial district? It seemed pretty rough” You commented to Midoriya absentmindedly while you took your uwabaki from your locker. He visibly flinched as he heard your question almost dropping his shoes in the process.

“Ye-Yeah, they said that the pro heroes could hardly put up a fight because of the villain’s quirk.”

“Right? Hopefully All Might was nearby, otherwise who knows what would have happen. I wonder if the hostage is ok, I didn’t watch the news last night so I’m not pretty sure what exactly happened. Do you know how it was?

He flinched again and turned his head to you rigidly as you raised an eyebrow at his sudden odd behavior.

“I do-don’t know a lot but I read that everything was ok afterwards, the hostage walked out with just a couple of scratches, so there’s nothing to be concerned about Shinohara-san, it’s pretty nice of you to worry so much, especially since the hostage…” Midoriya looked down and tapped his trembling indexes together; he wanted to tell you something, but didn’t know how.

“Come on Midoriya, you already told me the hostage is ok, what can be so bad that you are hesitant to tell me?” You inquired him softly.

“Is nothing bad per se, well, you’ll see the hostage…” He paused and looked in all directions to check if anybody was listening. Ok, weird. He got a little closer to you and cupped his mouth with his left hand.

“The pe-person captured yesterday was-”

Your little hush-hush conversation was interrupted when the metallic sound of a locker being abruptly opened echoed in the sudden silent space. Your ears located the unexpected noise behind you and instinctively you turned to see what had caused such a ruckus.

A couple of lockers from you, a really angry and really frustrated Bakugou appeared right in front of your eyes. You observed how out of the blue everything and everybody seemed to freeze in time, and all eyes were on him. The atmosphere turned tense, every person there watched attentively his every movement, talking with just a glance, some people were whispering among themselves no even taking their eyes off him.

‘What the hell is happening?’

He took his uwabaki and slammed them on the floor, removed his shoes and buried them unceremoniously in the locker, slamming the door shut. He grumbled, trying fruitlessly to put his uwabaki, cursing that he couldn't put them on as smoothly as he would’ve liked. He suddenly stopped his movements, acknowledging the unwanted attention he was receiving.

“The hell are you looking at you fucking losers?! Why don’t you mind your own damn business, huh?!”

His voice echoed with fury at the school entrance, despite their obvious fear, nobody moved an inch, all the eyes glued on him. He finished to put on his shoes and stomped further inside. At the corner of his eye he noticed your presence and immediately stared at you, he seemed even more infuriated than before, this clearly soured his mood even further, if that was even possible.

You returned it with one of your own, as intense or more as his, the attention seemed to turn your way as your little staring contest became longer, Midoriya nervously looked between you and him, probably waiting for another showdown to break out, just like yesterday. Everybody’s breath hitched by the minute, but you didn’t back down, your (E/C) eyes met the fiery inferno of his crimson ones, after a couple more seconds he just tsked and stomped away with his hands buried way deep in his pockets.

After he left, the clock started ticking again, everyone took a breath of relief, averted their eyes from his retracting back and continued their lives like always. Midoriya’s shoulders relaxed significantly at the time that his soul slowly returned to his body. When you noticed him more calmed and focused, decided to address the elephant in the room.

“What. The. Heck. Just. Happened?” You whispered bewildered. “Who peed on his cereal? If this is something usual here, I’ll be more than glad to take my bike and go all the way back to Sapporo.” You crossed your arms over your chest and stared irritated at his retracting back.

“Well, now that Captain McTantrum™ left, what was that you wanted to tell me about yesterday’s incident?” You asked relaxing your demeanor to something more gentle and friendly. Midoriya flinched slightly and his poise appear suddenly uneasy.

“Um, well, the person-the-the person th-th-that got trapped by the mud villain, tha-tha-that person…” Midoriya tried over and over but it was useless, he couldn’t complete a single sentence without stumbling over his own words. Noticing that using his words would be useless, he looked at you in the eyes to then wander his gaze, pointing to something behind him. You started at him completely lost while he kept repeating the same cycle of looking at you and then looking away, urging you to get what he was trying to say, not moving his head once, like he was unsure to look back.

You exanimated what was at his back; just a couple of students walking to their respective classrooms, friends greeting each other, and Bakugou turning to the right at the end of the corridor to go upstairs-

‘Wait, Bakugou?’

Then it hit you, the awkward silence when he arrived, the unwanted starring, the murmuring, his more than usual foul mood, the outburst, Midoriya’s reluctance to tell you, he probably though he would get into trouble with him if it reached his ears that stupid Deku was talking shit of him to thief bitch. Everything made sense now. You broke out of your trance and looked at Midoriya “Was Bakugou?-” He eagerly nodded his head, satisfied that you finally understood him.

“Oh, I see…”

“Y-Yes…”

“…”

“…”

“HOLLY SHIT-”

.

.

With the issue clarified and only five minutes left before the class started you two proceeded to go upstairs as well. Midoriya and you made small talk with some intervals of comfortable silence here and there, soon enough you both reached your classroom, people chatting lively when you opened the door. Midoriya walked in just behind you as you made it to your designated seats.

‘If I’m not wrong, Math is our first class of the day’ your mind wandered to other school related topics while you seated at your desk, just as you did the bell ringed and your teacher entered the classroom and started his lesson of the day.

.

.

Midday finally came, which mean it was finally lunch time, you invited Midoriya beforehand to eat with you, he timidly accepted, after a lot of nervous quacking but you could tell he seem excited about the idea. As soon as the bell that announced the so waited lunch break ringed, you proceeded to pack your books and stationery into your bag and take out your bento when your desk was crowded by what it looked like to be all the girls in your class. One of them, a girl with short brown hair and blue eyes was the first to approach you.

“Hey Shinohara! Do you want to have lunch with us? We didn’t actually have the chance to talk yesterday and we thought it would be nice to know you better.” She spoke.

“Yuki-chan is right! Is refreshing to have another girl in the class after almost three years since we are very few, with you we are eight now!” Said another one of them visibly thrilled.

“You looked so cool yesterday when you confronted Bakugou!”

“I think nobody has managed to do that and live after it, or actually do it”

“Right?!”

“So awesome!”

They gave you a really kind and chill vibe, chatting and praising you animatedly. Although they seemed to really enjoy Bakugou’s antics against your green head classmate, well, nobody's perfect, noted. You can’t judge the book by its cover, but when you looked at them, it’s impossible to not think about…

The offer is almost irresistible.

Almost.

“That sounds lovely! But Midoriya and I agreed to have lunch together today, so I’m afraid we’ll have to leave it to another time.” You almost cringed at how cutesy and honeyed your voice sounded but they seemed to buy it, until their expressions made a 180. Their faces were shocked and almost offended at the thought of you putting him over their proposal. It was a ‘are you for real?’ reaction over all. You kept smiling at them to emphasize that you were serious, when the girl that talked first tried to dissuade you.

“B-But why don’t you eat with us today and leave your lunch with him for tomorrow? I’m sure Midoriya won’t have a problem, right?” She turned and looked at him just as the rest of the girls did after she, Midoriya flinched nervously holding his bento at the unexpected attention he was receiving.  

“Eh…! I…! Well… Um…”

“You see! He’s ok with it!”

‘He hasn’t even said a thing!’ You thought trying to conceal your disbelief. ‘Let’s put all the beef on the grill then’

“Oh, I got an idea!” You chimed. “Midoriya! Why don’t you join us for lunch too? That way nobody eats alone and we get to know better! It’s a win-win plan! What do you think?” You were not dumb, although it was true you can’t judge anybody by a simple glance, you had a somewhat firm idea of why they were so eager to mingle with you, so you just did what you thought it was necessary to make sure it was not that, and what a better way than with your nerve-wreck of a friend.

‘What a better way to know someone’s character than by the way they treat others?’  

The poor guy looked like he was about to have a seizure and your classmates were not any better; they looked at you even more astonished than before, and you could swear that they started to sweat. Suddenly they look to be hesitant, even the more insistent one. They looked at you, at each other and then at Midoriya.

“I-I think you are right, it wasn’t very nice to insist after you already had plans with…Midoriya, I guess we can leave it for another day.” The others seem to agree, a bit crestfallen but relieved nonetheless.

‘I knew it…’

They shortly left after that; you kept your friendly smile until they finally disappeared behind the door, when they were out of your view completely you let your smile fall and collected your lunch from your desk. You marched to the door, but stopped midway when you noticed that certain someone was still standing lost in his own world, mumbling nonsense as usual.

“Midoriya” You called him, he seemed to have got out of his trance and looked at you eyewided, confused and bewildered.

“Huh?”

“Are you coming or what?” You said smiling.

He stared at you genuinely surprised, but he swiftly shook his head and walked towards you.

“Yes!”

“A-Are we going to eat outside?” he asked curiously.

“I mean, it’s a beautiful day the temperature is perfect and this would actually be the first time ever that I had the chance to be outside in early April without freezing my butt. Do you have any place in mind?”

“No, I-I always eat by myself, so I prefer to stay in the classroom” He answered somewhat ashamed.

“Its ok, I know the perfect place.”

[inkribbon796]

Backstage Blues

Summary: Roman is determined to plan out the greatest wedding in history, if only he could get some help on that front.

A/N: I have decided that for the sake of the narrative that Tubbo and Ranboo’s marriage is a lot more common knowledge, Michael’s existence is still not, but whether Techno knows about that marriage is up in the air because he’s Techno. He focuses on weird stuff.

Things were strangely quiet in Egoton. Especially for the amount of people trying to actively kill each other these days.

The heroes had some of their usual problems to deal with: robberies, press talks, superhero activity; things that the heroes usually had to take care of.

The press wanted interviews with the heroes’ new “apprentices” and they were counting three of them, despite the fact that the Coalition had only two currently on record: Bomble Bee, Big Man . . . and Enderwalk, as Tubbo liked to introduce Ranboo.

With Tubbo’s husband almost acting like an apprentice, and the city absolutely loved the idea of a new trio of apprentices. Tommy loved being on TV, screaming and cursing when Ethan didn’t try to distract him from something else. And Tubbo who would ask overly invasive questions on camera about the most population-dense area of the city. Ranboo often helped Logan with Tubbo so that he didn’t accidentally give out bomb threats on live news feeds. Ranboo between his more demonic appearances and skittish nature the news could get close to him without putting themselves in harm’s way.

Despite Logan and the rest of the more senior heroes’ efforts, Ranboo was starting to become more and more an attachment onto the Sides. Mostly because Ranboo liked to come over and talk to Tubbo, and other times he liked to bring little snacks and trinkets. He wasn’t an apprentice yet, but with two of his little trio in the Coalition, a lot of people figured it was only a matter of time.

And occasionally he actually remembered to wear that identity-obscuring outfit Tubbo had made him a week ago.

Roman was really coming around to Tubbo, mostly because he and Tommy liked to listen to music and quote random musicals. Which was really all the requirement that Roman needed to like someone.

Today Logan, Tubbo, and Ranboo had accompanied Roman on a very important mission. Mostly because Roman was meeting with Illinois and Eric to help finalize some final touches on what Roman was sure was going to be the most glorious wedding in all of existence.

The couple met Roman in an outdoor café, taking advantage of the nice, warm summer weather. Roman was at one table with Eric and Illinois, while Logan was two tables over with Tubbo and Ranboo. Everyone except for Illinois were in superhero outfits, mostly because Illinois didn’t care about his own identity and he wasn’t a hero.

Any errant press that wanted a picture of “Egoton’s own Romeo and Juliet” because one was a hero and the other worked in Dark’s network — to which Illinois originally shouted when he first heard that “at least pick a couple with a chance” — and the sight of them always made Eric extremely jumpy. After Illinois caught sight of them it usually took a second or two for them to suddenly get pulled into a portal and dumped somewhere else to give the couple a little bit of privacy.

After another ameteur “reporter” had been dealt with, Roman looked over to the trio over in the other table. Tubbo and Logan were working on some equipment while “watching” Illinois. Ranboo’s lanky legs were pulled up in his chair and he was folded up in his seat.

Honestly Roman was pretty sure you could shove a bus under their noses and they wouldn’t notice. Which was a disappointment because he needed a third party to help give his ideas a little positive gratification because Illinois was letting Dark completely plan the entire affair with no consideration for what Roman suggested except for “paltry concessions”. Roman needed Patton to back him up, but Illinois drew the line at two Sides being part of his wedding planning at any one time.

“It’ll be a wonderful experience,” Roman promised, looking back from his failed check for Logan’s support. Then he looked over to Tubbo. “Bomble, you’re married, tell him.”

“Huh?” Tubbo snapped to look at him, clearly distracted by what he was working on. Ranboo put his feet down.

“You’re married,” Roman urged. “Explosion Boy needs a little bit of confidence for the wedding. How’d you and your husband get married? I’m sure it was beautiful.”

Tubbo snorted, “I got married fer[1] tax benefits.”

Roman blinked at him, “What?”

Tubbo chuckled to himself, looking positively pleased with himself. “Yeah, bonded pairs in the SMP get a bit of an aura break if yer linked with an empath. I got sick an’ tired ‘a havin’ ta pay that extremely pricey piper an’ Ranboo had just joined so when I saw him I went “that’s the one” an’ we were already kinda friends so BAM! We’ve been married fer almost six months now.”[2]

“What?” Roman repeated in complete, astonished confusion.

“Sides,”[3] Tubbo added, “yer older than I am, shouldn’t you have changed yer apprentice name ta somethin’ like, I don’t know? Concussion? Explosive Decompression. Or Combust-ION?”[4]

Tubbo paused, thinking, “That last one’s not half bad, I probably should have gone with that one.”

Another pause from the young arsonist passed, “Okay if you don’t take that one I want it after I stop bein’[5] an apprentice.”

“I, uh, I,” Eric stalled nervously.

“If he likes the name it stays,” Illinois dismissed. “If he wants to change it, he’ll get around to it.”

Tubbo shrugged, turning back to his projects with his usual dismissive but chipper demeanor.

“There must have been some romantic aspect of your engagement,” Roman demanded in exasperation.

“Nah, man,” Tubbo chuckled. “You are talkin’ ta the wrong person. You should talk ta my sister an’ her girlfriend. Or Karl’s fiancés. That would probably make yer argument work.”[6]

“So if you got married for taxes, which, okay, I get that, how did you two actually decide to get married to each other?” Illinois looked confused but intrigued at the same time.

“Well Tubbo was already making jokes that we were already married and divorced so I just proposed,” Ranboo answered. “I kinda looked online how to do it and Tubbo had been mentioning the thing so I gave him some jewelry and I said “do you wanna get married for tax benefits” and to my amazement he said yes.”

“I was smitten,” Tubbo joked. “Certainly helped that he was throwin’[7] necklaces an’[8] gemstones at me.”

“Man you two aren’t just a can of worms, you’re a whole boat of ‘em[9] aren’t you?” Illinois asked.

“Neat trick I didn’t realize until afterward is that tax benefits count in the human world too,” Tubbo grinned.

“You are an absolute menace,” Logan told Tubbo, and the teen just startled cackling in laughter.

“Isn’t it great?” Tubbo grinned before looking back at Eric. “I’m sure yer weddin’ will be nice an’ pretty an’ stuff. Yer in love an’ shit, it’ll be great.”[10]

“I’m,” Eric hummed, making the word sound more like a smushed “m” in his nervousness. “Nervous.”

He was gripping onto his knees, “I-I’ll trip over my . . . stupid legs or—”

Illinois slowly and gently placed his hand over one of Eric’s. “Dulcito,[11] if you’re worried about it we can get you a wheelchair or I can just carry you down to the altar.”

Eric’s face went red, he started twitching a bit, “But . . . I’m supposed to walk down the aisle.”

“Fuck that,” Illinois told him, leaning in. “You’ll look lovely whatever you do, even impossibly lovelier if you’re happy. I don’t want you to hurt yourself over this, or be so worried you’re not enjoying it. It’s our day. Your day. We’re doing a huge ceremony because a bunch of people want to be there. But I could grab Host and my dad and we could go down today to the closest courthouse and be out in an hour flat.”

Roman twitched uncomfortably.

“We did that,” Ranboo cut in, looking back at Tubbo. “We had what? Six people?”

Tubbo started quickly counting on his fingers, “Puffy, Foolish, FJ, me, you, Niki, Eret, Michael . . . Yeah six, not includin’[12] us. Eight, if you do.”

“It was a nice little ceremony.” Ranboo reminisced with a smile on his face. “Eret married us, your sister walked me down the aisle.”

“You tripped on the stairs,” Tubbo chuckled, before turning to the engaged couple, “do yourselves a favor an’[8] make a ramp. Boo here is all legs like a mad giraffe an’[8] he ripped his dress when he tripped. Almost knockin’[13] Puffy over and you can’t do much worse than that, let me tell you.”

That didn’t seem to calm Eric’s nerves.

“Already been planned,” Illinois reassured.

“We’ll get back to that, just excuse me,” Roman cut in, “so your best friend didn’t even show up to your wedding?”

“No, he couldn’t have, he . . .” Tubbo paused, clearly thinking about something. “Big Man couldn’t be there, talk ta[14] him about it, it’s really not my place ta[14] bring it up. It wasn’t his fault, Dream just . . . like I said, it’s not my place ta[14] talk about it.”

“I,” Logan stalled, something in Logan’s brain didn’t like how that had been worded. “I see.”

“Yeah so Big Man wasn’t there,” Tubbo shrugged, a distant look hidden behind his domed helmet. “He’s around now an’ it is nice ta kinda have him back ta normal again. Wish he didn’t try ta set Boo on fire, but no one’s perfect.”[15]

“That is very concerning,” Logan commented. “When was the last time he tried that?”

“Tried or just threatened it?” Ranboo asked.

“Both,” Logan’s tone was as dry as a bone.

“Attempted, it’s been a couple months,” Ranboo admitted, “ he threatens it once every couple of weeks though.”

“We need to have a conversation about constructive behavior then,” Logan decided. “We’ll talk with him when we get back because death threats are unacceptable.”

“No, I’m pretty sure he’s joking,” Ranboo tried to deny. “The furthest he’s ever gone is pull out a knife on me. It’s alright, he’s just like that.”

“You know the more I see you heroes, the more I’m sure that if you’d ever actually met the Author, he would have cut through all of you like wet tissue paper.” Illinois spoke up, looking at Ranboo like a particularly accident-prone toddler. “You all really lucked out, didn’t you?”

Ranboo nervously ducked his head so he didn’t accidentally look Illinois in the eyes.

“Yoo-hoo! We have the world’s perfect wedding to plan.” Roman reminded, trying to refocus the attention. Inadvertently saving Ranboo from the stand-off. “Hey, while I have both of you here: what’s on the menu, what’s the number of chairs, seems like it should be higher.”

“Max of fifty,” Illinois reported. “None of Dark’s business contacts are invited, we figured you guys might arrest them.”

“Depends on the person,” Logan admitted.

Roman rolled his eyes, cutting back into the conversation, “I just wanted to know how we should just group people, is there any extended family we need to separate from each other?”

“My . . . siblings were all I had,” Eric whispered quietly.

“Well let’s see, Yan’s parents were part of a demon murder cult, they’re dead. Yancy’s folks are dead and he’s still not on speaking terms with his uncle for obvious reasons. King’s parents are dead. We literally all live with Bim’s dads. Fuck if the Host ever talks about Artie’s folks. And all we’ve got are shitty foster parents, who if they show up are getting exorcised back to hell and then killed again.” Illinois scoffed dismissively. “And even if I wanted someone who threw me away the instant they saw me, I would have gone looking for ‘em[9] years ago.”

“Didn’t you,” Eric started timidly before looking away, his mouth still open but not sound was coming out anymore. “Uh, get a, uhm . . .”

“Some asshat might have tried calling me at assfuck O’clock in the morning, but I blocked him,” Illinois sounded like he wanted to punch his mystery caller, Eric nervously looked away. “Dark’s my dad and I don’t care about anyone trying to get money or use me to cozy up close to Dark.”

The other two were quiet for a bit as Illinois mentally calmed down. He did reach out and lightly stroke the side of Eric’s face. Which helped Eric relax and by extension calm Illinois down.

“You could have just said no,” Roman finally commented in a tone that might as well have been saying: “I think you need therapy” and went back to his planner. “So we make a safe plan for sixty people?”

“Sounds good to me,” Illinois agreed, his tone brisk and forced.

He did take Eric’s hand in his own and smiled, “Don’t worry, my dear, I will make sure everything’s perfect for you. It’ll be the most amazing day of your life. I promised that I’d make sure you never regret saying yes to me. I meant it, it’ll be the most beautiful day of our lives and you will look amazing.”

That got Eric to tear up a little and after some minor note taking on Roman’s part, the couple left. Eric left with Roman, Logan, and the two apprentices, while the adventurer returned to Dark to run a couple “errands”.

Roman for his part was in a better mood, he’d gotten a couple more “concessions” and the wedding planning was coming along smoothly.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Post A/N: Also I would like to draw to everyone’s attention to the canon fact that Tubbo and Ranboo got married at an emotionally turbulent time for Tubbo. Tubbo doesn’t handle those moments well. Impulsive marriage to escape how he felt about what happened to Tommy? . . . It’s more likely than you might think.

Accessibility Translations:

1. for

2. Yeah, bonded pairs in the SMP get a bit of an aura break if you’re linked with an empath. I got sick and tired of having to pay that extremely pricey piper and Ranboo had just joined so when I saw him I went “that’s the one” and we were already kinda friends so BAM! We’ve been married for almost six months now.

3. Besides

4. you’re older than I am, shouldn’t you have changed your apprentice name to something like, I don’t know? Concussion? Explosive Decompression. Or Combust-ION?

5. being

6. You are talking to the wrong person. You should talk to my sister and her girlfriend. Or Karl’s fiancés. That would probably make your argument work.

7. throwing

8. and

9. them

10. I’m sure your wedding will be nice and pretty and stuff. You’re in love and shit, it’ll be great.

11. Sweetheart

12. including

13. knocking

14. to

15. He’s around now and it is nice to kind of have him back to normal again. Wish he didn’t try to set Boo on fire, but no one’s perfect.