#I just think it’s funny

[chaos-interwoven]

all i can imagine is aaron having had to deal with neil being a capital-t terrible patient for hours on end because you’re right, he would not behave. like he would be trying to get up every few minutes, especially when aaron steps out to check on one of his other patients which means aaron feels the need to be in neil’s room more so that he doesn’t injure himself and aaron isn’t accountable for his dumb ass decisions. and neil would be lying about the pain to try to get himself discharged early. even after aaron turns up the morphine drip (or whatever it is lol, my medical “knowledge” comes from medical dramas), neil is still lying through his teeth and aaron is just like what the actual fuck. because there no way neil isn’t in pain, he’s actively bleeding cause he pulled his stitches trying to get out of bed like an idiot

and then andrew arrives and neil is still trying to say he is fine and can be discharged. and aaron is blocking him out, too busy freaking out over his look-alike and too tired to deal with neil’s obvious lies. but andrew is arguing back and calling him a junkie and all aaron can focus on is “omg his voice sounds like mine too wtf wtf wtf”

he must make some sort of noise, a gasp or that choking in the back of his throat is accidentally vocalized, cause next thing he knows neil is sliding him a cool glare (and again, how the fuck is he still acting like this on so much morphine) and switching to german. his doppelgänger rolls his eyes but follows him into the other language and now aaron is even more convinced that he is losing his mind. screw whatever his coworker said, he no longer believes her. they’re both exhausted, why should her mind be trusted more than his own. clearly this is some sort of hallucination because no way he encounters someone who looks like him, sounds like him, and speaks german too. he needs to listen to katelyn and get more than 5 hours of sleep before a shift and stop having multiple energy drinks. that’s what this is. there is no other reasonable explanation.

he goes to leave the room, needing to escape the insanity and completely okay with leaving one character of his hallucination to deal with the other. he’ll come back. he has to and hallucination or not, he will not be a bad nurse. just maybe after he asks his charge nurse to check his vitals.

he gives neil’s monitors a quick look over and tries to ignore the two arguing in german. but hey its not his fault he can understand them, even if he’s trying to not listen. but then neil says something about needing to be back on the court by thursday and he’s reaching for his IV line like he’s going to pull it out and before aaron can stop himself, he’s saying “don’t,”quick and angry in german and covering neil’s IV with his hand. two sets of eyes whip around to stare at him and that’s it, he’s fleeing. he will deal with this later.

An AU where the twinyards don’t meet until even mater in life— as in after college where everything from Andrew’s end goes almost the same minus Aaron and Nicky being in his life. He still makes it Palmetto, still meets Kevin and Neil and goes pro. Aaron on the other hand becomes a nurse (I have my reasons for this) never goes to Palmetto, and they only meet because one injured Neil Josten ends up on his unit. Aaron is about at his wits end because Pro Exy player Neil Josten (whoever that is because Aaron doesn’t follow Exy), who is on a lot of pain meds, keeps calling him Andrew and Aaron is about 5 seconds away from making the on-call resident very upset by requesting another CT scan of Josten’s head because surely his brain is scrambled. There’s nothing more that Aaron wants than to go home and fall face first into bed which is of course when his charge nurse walks up to him with a sheepish look, nearly begging him to stay another 4 hours because his relief’s kid is apparently sick and she can’t come in until 11am, which makes Aaron want to die so naturally he agrees, which means another 4 hours of Neil Josten at the end of his shift hooray.

And so of course Neil Josten calls him “Andrew” once more while Aaron is checking his IV (note: it’s now visiting hours), and Aaron, exhausted and cranky and just had to dodge a bedpan being thrown at his head, feels his eye twitch violently as he politely (read: thru clenched teeth) reminds Pro Exy Player Neil Josten once again that he is not Andrew—

Which is when another voice pipes up from the doorway, fresh scent of coffee in the air that nearly has Aaron salivating, who says “correct, you are not Andrew. I am.”

And Aaron turns around to see his mirror image standing in the doorway.

[oysters-aint-for-me]

my (very queer) friend is pregnant for the first time and she’s been on all the baby message boards (eg tiktok, facebook) and she found this tag that was like “ftm pregnancy” and she was like “oh cool! there’s whole tag for pregnant transmen!” and then was extremely confused as to why the tag was full of what appeared to be cisgender women. she was like “i mean i don’t wanna judge, maybe they are transmen but they don’t look how i expected them to, that’s okay, if they say they’re trans then they are” except she kept looking through the tag and literally NONE of them were transmen, ALL of them appeared to be ciswomen. she was VERY confused, seriously questioning what she knew about trans people (and not to be like “she has trans friends!” but literally her partner is trans, her sibling in law is trans, many of her friends are trans/nb, hell i think she’s a bit nonbinary herself, idk, we haven’t actually talked about that recently lol) and doubting reality in general.

and then she found out that, amongst a huge section of the internet to which she had never been exposed before, “ftm” stands for First Time Mom.

there’s no moral to this story i just thought it was funny

[decaffeinatedpartymuggoop]

My favorite thing about Annabeth is her wardrobe.

Cause like, Rick simplifies her clothes in a way a man would, and you can tell.

Cause in EVERY book, from The Lightning Thief to Chalice, she’s in the goddamn CHB shirt. With like some shorts or cargo pants. Nothing more, nothing less.

He’s made improvements over the years, giving her some other clothes. But he’ll always come back to old faithful.

Like, he most definitely did it on accident, but he made her so Adam Sandler and I love it

[lasagnaenemy]

[pupvi]

[fuckitpossumorb]

Comprehensive chart of Derek’s characters.

[walltalks]

In my eyes in any instance of Callie being sent to a universe that the plane never crashed the funniest thing to occur would be her not being surprised by having two moms (because why would she, that would make so much sense considering how much baggage Shauna has for Jackie), no, she would be surprised by the fact that she’s Jewish (because of course Shauna lost her faith in the wilderness and when she married Jeff let him run all the traditions)

Callie: WE’RE JEWISH??!!!

Older brother: YOU AREN’T???!!

[youngerfrankenstein]

[houseof1000leaves]

Lawyer reacts to Ace Attorney series are my biggest guilty pleasure rn, and most of them are either working in a very different field or are public defenders, but I finally found a criminal prosecutor reacts. The difference has me baffled. Like.

Every other lawyer: [muffled sounds of rage] THAT’S NOT—NO—WHAT?? IS THIS JUST THE “FUCK THE DEFENSE’S RIGHTS” DAY??

This one guy: Oh, haha, you could theoretically pull that off irl if you tried. No, that’s a legit objection, shut up Phoenix. Technically, the fourth amendment only applies to—

This is proof to me that Edgeworth is accurate, actually. [/j]

[star-containment]

david tennant: wears black

the entire fandom: crowley!

[caspergetspegged]

love how u can find grim’s onlyreaper account on the mc’s computer bc it not only implies they searched up “only reaper” (be it for the bit or plain curiosity) they specifically searched up grim; that is telling of how in love (obsessed) mc is

[noxious-amillion]

I’ve always got sailor moon on at work so yknow I had to draw more sailor uranus Zam

[greatbananaboat]

caitlyn during the caitvi breakup era: shameful, bra-wearing, sad, lonely, misses her baby

caitlyn during the caitvi makeup era: playful, no bra, smiles for the first time in the season, gets her pussy ate

[breezysuffers]

listening to this and the only thing going through my head is “aww, gabe’s probably still alive”

[kacievvbbbb]

Do you think the marines had no idea about the humandrills and so when they pulled up on Kurigina and had to face an army of expertly skilled swordmonkeys they had to reevaluate everything they thought they knew about Hawkeyes.

a Marine writing his report like “unbeknownst to the world government Hawkeyes has apparently been secretly training an army of monkeys to sword fight in his spare time and has proven to be very successful as we lost half our men to them.”

And so now their little Mihawk files, that requires its own filing cabinet, contains the the questions;

Did he teach the monkeys to sword fight or does he control the monkeys like puppets?

How did he teach the monkeys to sword fight?

Some kind of animal control devil fruit?

Hawkeyes can communicate with animals?

Is he actually part hawk? Part monkey???

Marines animal fighting division, when?

Could Garp train dogs to brawl?

Can Garp get his own army of monkeys or steal Mihawk’s? 🥺

[yourlegacysnotyourstosee]

“Michie Nation” and it’s like 10 of us