#I just need someone that will take me to download next year

[say-im-a-dreamer]

who let me have access to dating apps again 😭

[melbatron5000]

The Big Damn Kiss

Buckle up, my fellow Good Omens Ineffable Mystery Puzzlers, Crackpotters, and Assorted Brainrotters, because I learned something HUGE yesterday.

This will be a bit of a long post, because I want to show you exactly how I got where I am. I want you to understand. I want to put all the naysayers to bed (ha! But I'm still gonna try), and settle this once and for all.

I know (almost) exactly what Crowley gave to Aziraphale during the kiss.

DO NOT TAKE ANY OF MY THEORIES TO NEIL! PLEASE!

Okay? Okay. Thanks. Shall we begin?

Ahem.

Firstly, whether you believe me or not, I am 100% certain that Crowley did, indeed, give something to Aziraphale in his mouth during The Kiss. I've covered that in the link previous. Okay? Okay.

I did not know what it was. I've now heard theories that it was a bullet (nope), a ball bearing (nope), hellfire (nope), and no one, NO ONE has suggested what I see. (If you have, hello! Talk to me!)

Here's our first foreshadowing Clue:

And here's our next foreshadowing Clue:

And the next:

And our last Clue:

With me so far? Well, that first GIF is a bit off, I couldn't find one of Crowley actually spitting out the flies. But he does. When Beelzebub first drags him to Hell, he actually goes "Pleaugh!" and spits out four or five flies. Edit: Found it!

Moving right along, we come to Crowley in Heaven with Muriel, looking at the trial. We learn two important things here:

One, Gabriel doesn't have a desk.

Two, Muriel does. Where they keep the records. And it's a bit lonely. Every few hundred years, someone comes and asks for something. Muriel can't access the sensitive ones, you have to be pretty high up. A throne, dominion, or higher. Like, maybe Supreme Archangel?

So if Gabriel doesn't have a desk, whose desk is he at when he's getting ready to leave Heaven? Of course I can't find a damn picture of Gabriel at the desk, but it's Muriel's. Where they keep the RECORDS.

Gabriel puts his memory into the fly, then gets on the elevator to go to Earth.

Now, when Gabriel opens the fly with his memories inside, we find out that it's a container. Bigger on the inside. You can put thing(S) in it. The bit we see of him remembering is shot in two parts, one where he's flying down a red tunnel, one where he's flying down a blue. If you slow this scene down and watch, you can see that he is NOT looking at just his own memories. There is more going on here, more that he was not present for. @embracing-the-ineffable put up a great meta about that here. Go look!

Now I figured Gabriel must have taken something else. Something important. Something useful. Something he meant to give to Aziraphale, except he forgot.

I also figured he must have left whatever it was in the fly when he took his memories out. Crowley must have realized while watching the trial footage that Gabriel also grabbed something else. I don't know when Crowley grabs the fly, but he does. And that is what he gives to Aziraphale in the kiss. Why? Well.

I had no idea what Gabriel took until I started working on the chiastic structure of season 2. I'm not done with that analysis yet, but let me show you one thing that I have found so far:

(The numbers are just to try and help me navigate the story and its events without time stamps)

My note #357 of what happens isn't quite right, but when I saw the only two times Aziraphale says "I forgive you" are towards the beginning of Season 2 and towards the end, I realized I had something.

Rephrase line 357: Crowley's kiss is forgiven IN EXCHANGE FOR RECORDS.

(Not that I think Crowley's kiss needs to be forgiven. It's just what Aziraphale says, and had to say at that moment, because the Metatron was listening in.)

What does Heaven in Good Omens remind us of most of all?

A big corporate entity. And what do powerful people do when they get fired from a big corporate entity? They download all their emails while they're cleaning out their desks. Damning emails. Emails that can be used to black mail or even destroy big corporate entities. Or, ya know, maybe they swipe some sensitive RECORDS?

Oh yes.

Records that Gabriel meant to give to Aziraphale, but he forgot. Records that Crowley realized Gabriel had put in the fly. The fly that Crowley grabbed once Gabriel had his memory out. The fly that he gave to Aziraphale when he kissed him. The fly that no longer held Gabriel's memory, but did still contain those damning records.

Here's Aziraphale reading the records:

Here's Aziraphale being horrified and outraged by what he's reading:

And here's Aziraphale realizing he has got some GOOD DIRT on Heaven. Maybe enough to bring them down:

That's it folks. I have no idea what the records actually say, and maybe we're not meant to know until season 3, but whatever it is, it's GOOD.

That's my story, and by God Herself, I'm sticking to it.

[tiyoin]

Taking a step back from twisted singer reader (I'll be back). I really want to expand/give origins ideas to the group chat(s?). Like how reader got the phone, how they got added and other things. Btw love who added that

With that said I'm starting a new agenda: ✨Grandfather Mozus Trein :D✨ Everyone knows that Crowley is *cough* neglectful & irresponsible *cough* always there for his students and never once put himself first 🤠. I feel like reader low-key reminds Trein of Anastasia (red hair) ya know? Maybe it's how reader plays with their hair when they start getting bored or the doodles on the written exams. All these little habits they share. Just an old man missing his family.

Someone has to be a responsible adult for reader and who else is better then a father with so much wisdom. He knows Yuu has a way of communicating and protecting himself so he isn't as concerned ,but poor reader can't do that to save their life :(

So I can see Trein giving them(mostly reader) a phone (B4 book 4). It's nothing new or special; it has an old blue case with a fading pattern and skuffs. The best part about it is Trein paying the bill. The wallpaper is changed to Grimm napping tho

It's kinda an unspoken rule that reader keeps it for the most part. With Yuu and all the things he tends to get into it would last a week if he was lucky.

More then likely the only numbers in the phone are Aduce/ maybe the other first years and Trein ,but I don't really see any of them be texters tbh. So not much coming in. Maybe a few homework questions??

As for apps a see maybe 2-ish games 👁️👄➖

Over all, it's just a classic antisocial person's phone. Until Cater finds out. Next time Yuu has the phone Carter tells him what should be added and how to #sign up for them. And Yuu being the person he is asks "Cater how do I help my introvert make friends?" Cater being the #helpful upperclassmen is he downloads the app and sends the invite.

The app they use is probably the twst discord. I think that's the only social idia has/honestly uses Some of them has like a cover for the icon. Like no one can know they use that app for whatever reason.

Everyone besides reader kinda knows what account belongs to which person. To add a bit of anonymous(ness?). Cuz no way would reader give her honest opinion about Rook or someone else if she knew that they themselves/close friends are in the chat.

Imagine if one of the guys that reader doesn't get along with ends up being one of reader's close/safe online friend. Like idk if you know who Aphmau is but she has a Minecraft roleplay PDH (don't judge me plss) where Aph and Aaron don't like each other irl but are really close online friends.

I'm sorry if my asks tend to be all over the place. I get sided tracked a lot and end up spacing out every 10 works. This was written between 3-5ish am. Also 👉👈 I think the reason we're on the same brain wave is cuz we're air signs.

Also thank you for liking/replying to my ask/yapping ☺️ it's means a lot to me

I've been waiting to get a Mac charger just to answer this ask🤭

GRANDFATHER TREIN IS SOMETHING I DID NOT KNOW I NEEDED BUT GLAD I GOT

because we always see crewel v crowley for custody over yuu.

but I defiantly agree with you that trein would see one of his daughters; especially anastasia in reader. whether it's by a few habits they both share, or how they're sometimes second fiddle to their more out going companion. but trein can see reader's life falling into shambles the more they're in twisted wonderland, the more they're isolated, and it kills him as both a father and educator.

and believe it or not, he cares about his students. they may not think so and curse him in the hallways, but they'll be thanking him in years to come, they always do (he prides himself in that, and the line of students he has at reunions telling him they're the best teacher they ever had.)

so maybe he pulls reader aside after class, ofc he can tell how tense they are, how nervous they are... especially by how intense their eye contact is, a little creepy but trein understands. he tells them to sit down in a chair he magically spawned as he flicks his head at lucien. who is all too glad to use you as a chair. he can see reader visibly relax as they're testing the water's with the temperamental feline, but trein starts talking.

he wants to help them, as he wouldn't be doing his job as an educator if he just stood by and watched you struggle. how he would have failed the pledge he made to crowley and himself if he let one os his students fall under the radar in favor for his smarter ones.

yes that should sting but it's the truth, and to no fault of your own. you obviously had... less than stupor teaching before this, and you have to catch up on a decades worth of stuff due to your... situation. and he is willing to help you during both lunch hours and free period. he also recommends student tutors for this and is willing to work out some kind of deal between you and the tutors. he wants to see you succeed. not just to prove he can turn a pumpkin into a carriage, but because you deserve it.

maybe you're not so much like his biological daughter, but like his step daughter. the one with a soul of diamond but a heart of glass. and if reader ever needs someone trustworthy (and he emphasizes this) that isn't actively split-dying their hair in their thirties or prances around with a bird mask then he is always open.

no matter how burdenous they feel relying on him, or if they think the matters are silly. he will tell it to them straight. he also suggests talking to cater diamond of heartslabyul, that if anyone can help you make friends, its that chatterbox.

dont even try to refute it cause trein AND lucien will be sporting you an unimpressed look.

but I swear to everything cater has a fucking NOSE- a sniffer if you would for introverts. or he has mastered chenya's invisibility spell and over heard your conversation because- I AGREE WITH YOU- yuu would 100% ask cater to help his little ol' introvert make friends.

so he seeks them out, grabs their phone while chatting away, and downloads 'magi cord' dw yuu is there too. cater even goes a step further and adds his contact to their phone because 'tehe he has the elusive reader's number and no body else does! #1inamillion #hewon! #he'sgonnaextrovertsohardit'llmakeyourheadspin 😼

but later that night you're fighting to go on the app when cater sends you a link, the second message he sends you (with 'hey hey! it's your fav upper classmen cay-cay here!' with an obnoxious amount of emojis, being the first)

it's a link to a magi cord group chat called; raven of secrets. (or smthn idk, I pulled that out of my ass) and he explains that the whole point of that group chat is to remain anonymous. there's a handful of members from different dorms and that's all you're supposed to know.

they talk about gossip, homework, assignments etc. the more he talks about it the more it sounds like a secret society. but nonetheless, you join.

and all hell breaks loose 🤭

personally I think that only a few people know who is who in the chat group. like the organizer because they gotta make sure everyone who has the link is an nrc student. and obviously there's a few friends who gave other people the link or joined together. but there's also active polls where people debate who is who.

just so it gives them the extra comfort of anonymity.

IMAGINE SOME ADMITS TO STALKING POOR READER AND IT TURNS INTO A THRILLER AHHHH (everyone knows who rook is. not because of his French, but because of his detailed posts)

--

NO CAUSE I WAS ALSO AN APHMAU FAN HAHAHAH I used to eat her role plays up. but watching them now... they're super cringe and I can barely watch an episode of phoenix drop high 😭

and dont even worry about it 'being all over the place because I am literally like that and it's so fun being able to bounce all over the place hehe

AND YAY ANOTHER AIR SIGN😽

[geneeste]

Creating a personal fanfic archive using Calibre, various Calibre plugins, Firefox Reader View, and an e-Reader / BookFusion / Calibre-Web

A few years ago I started getting serious about saving my favorite fic (or just any fic I enjoyed), since the Internet is sadly not actually always forever when it comes to fanfiction. Plus, I wanted a way to access fanfic offline when wifi wasn't available. Enter a personal fanfic archive!

There are lots of ways you can do this, but I thought I'd share my particular workflow in case it helps others get started. Often it's easier to build off someone else's workflow than to create your own!

Please note that this is for building an archive for private use -- always remember that it's bad form to publicly archive someone else's work without their explicit permission.

This is going to be long, so let's add a read more!

How to Build Your Own Personal Fanfic Archive

Step One: Install Calibre

Calibre is an incredibly powerful ebook management software that allows you to do a whole lot of stuff having to do with ebooks, such as convert almost any text-based file into an ebook and (often) vice-versa. It also allows you to easily side-load ebooks onto your personal e-reader of choice and manage the collection of ebooks on the device.

And because it's open source, developers have created a bunch of incredibly useful plugins to use with Calibre (including several we're going to talk about in the next step), which make saving and reading fanfiction super easy and fun.

But before we can do that, you need to download and install it. It's available for Windows, MacOS, Linux, and in a portable version.

Step Two: Download These Plugins

This guide would be about 100 pages long if I went into all of the plugins I love and use with Calibre, so we're just going to focus on the ones I use for saving and reading fanfiction. And since I'm trying to keep this from becoming a novel (lolsob), I'll just link to the documentation for most of these plugins, but if you run into trouble using them, just tag me in the notes or a comment and I'll be happy to write up some steps for using them.

Anyway, now that you've downloaded and installed Calibre, it's time to get some plugins! To do that, go to Preferences > Get plugins to enhance Calibre.

You'll see a pop-up with a table of a huge number of plugins. You can use the Filter by name: field in the upper right to search for the plugins below, one at a time.

Click on each plugin, then click Install. You'll be asked which toolbars to add the plugins to; for these, I keep the suggested locations (in the main toolbar & when a device is connected).

FanFicFare (here's also a great tutorial for using this plugin) EpubMerge (for creating anthologies from fic series) EbubSplit (for if you ever need to break up fic anthologies) Generate Cover (for creating simple artwork for downloaded fic) Manage Series (for managing fic series)

You'll have to restart Calibre for the plugins to run, so I usually wait to restart until I've installed the last plugin I want.

Take some time here to configure these plugins, especially FanFicFare. In the next step, I'll demonstrate a few of its features, but you might be confused if you haven't set it up yet! (Again, highly recommend that linked tutorial!)

Step Three: Get to Know FanFicFare (and to a lesser extent, Generate Cover)

FanFicFare is a free Calibre plugin that allows you to download fic in bulk, including all stories in a series as one work, adding them directly to Calibre so that that you can convert them to other formats or transfer them to your e-reader.

As with Calibre, FanFicFare has a lot of really cool features, but we're just going to focus on a few, since the docs above will show you most of them.

The features I use most often are: Download from URLs, Get Story URLs from Email, and Get Story URLs from Web Page.

Download from URLs let's you add a running list of URLs that you'd like FanFicFare to download and turn into ebooks for you. So, say, you have a bunch of fic from fanfic.net that you want to download. You can do that!

Now, in this case, I've already downloaded these (which FanFicFare detected), so I didn't update my library with the fic.

But I do have some updates to do from email, so let's try getting story URLs from email!

Woohoo, new fic! Calibre will detect when cover art is included in the downloaded file and use that, but at least one of these fic doesn't have cover art (which is the case for most of the fic I download). This is where Generate Cover comes in.

With Generate Cover, I can set the art, font, dimensions, and info content of the covers so that when I'm looking at the fic on my Kindle, I know right away what fic it is, what fandom it's from, and whether or not it's part of a series.

Okay, last thing from FanFicFare -- say I want to download all of the fic on a page, like in an author's profile on fanfic.net or all of the stories in a series. I can do that too with Get Story URLs from Web Page:

The thing I want to call out here is that I can specify whether the fic at this link are individual works or all part of an anthology, meaning if they're all works in the same series, I can download all stories as a single ebook by choosing For Anthology Epub.

Step Four: Using FireFox Reader View to Download Fic Outside of Archives

This is less common now thanks to AO3, but the elders among us may want to save fanfic that exists outside of archives on personal websites that either still exist or that exist only on the Internet Wayback Machine. FanFicFare is awesome and powerful, but it's not able to download fic from these kinds of sources, so we have to get creative.

I've done this in a couple of ways, none of which are entirely perfect, but the easiest way I've found thus far is by using Firefox's Reader View. Also, I don't think I discovered this -- I think I read about this on Tumblr, actually, although I can longer find the source (if you know it, please tell me so I can credit them!).

At any rate, open the fic in Firefox and then toggle on Reader View:

Toggling on Reader View strips all the HTML formatting from the page and presents the fic in the clean way you see in the preview below, which is more ideal for ebook formats.

To save this, go to the hamburger menu in the upper right of the browser and select Print, then switch to Print to PDF. You'll see the URL and some other stuff at the top and bottom of the pages; to remove that, scroll down until you see something like More settings... and uncheck Print headers and footers.

Click Save to download the resulting PDF, which you can then add to Calibre and convert to whichever format works best for your e-reader or archive method.

Step Five: Archiving (Choose Your Own Adventure)

Here's the really fun part: now that you know how to download your fave fanfics in bulk and hopefully have a nice little cache going, it's time to choose how you want to (privately) archive them!

I'm going to go through each option I've used in order of how easy it is to implement (and whether it costs additional money to use). I won't go too in depth about any of them, but I'm happy to do so in a separate post if anyone is interested.

Option 1: On Your Computer

If you're using Calibre to convert fanfic, then you're basically using your computer as your primary archive. This is a great option, because it carries no additional costs outside the original cost of acquiring your computer. It's also the simplest option, as it really doesn't require any advanced technical knowledge, just a willingness to tinker with Calibre and its plugins or to read how-to docs.

Calibre comes with a built-in e-book viewer that you can use to read the saved fic on your computer (just double-click on the fic in Calibre). You can also import it into your ebook app of choice (in most cases; this can get a little complicated just depending on how many fic you're working with and what OS you're on/app you're using).

If you choose this option, you may want to consider backing the fic up to a secondary location like an external hard drive or cloud storage. This may incur additional expense, but is likely still one of the more affordable options, since storage space is cheap and only getting cheaper, and text files tend to not be that big to begin with, even when there are a lot of them.

Option 2: On Your e-Reader

This is another great option, since this is what Calibre was built for! There are some really great, afforable e-readers out there nowadays, and Calibre supports most of them. Of course, this is a more expensive option because you have to acquire an e-reader in addition to a computer to run Calibre on, but if you already have an e-reader and haven't considered using it to read fanfic, boy are you in for a treat!

Option 3: In BookFusion

This is a really cool option that I discovered while tinkering with Calibre and used for about a year before I moved to a self-hosted option (see Option 4).

BookFusion is a web platform and an app (available on iOS and Android) that allows you to build your own ebook library and access it from anywhere, even when you're offline (it's the offline bit that really sold me). It has a Calibre plugin through which you can manage your ebook library very easily, including sorting your fanfic into easy-to-access bookshelves. You may or may not be able to share ebooks depending on your subscription, but only with family members.

Here's what the iOS app looks like:

The downside to BookFusion is that you'll need a subscription if you want to upload more than 10 ebooks. It's affordable(ish), ranging from $1.99 per month for a decent 5GB storage all the way to $9.99 for 100GB for power users. Yearly subs range from $18.99 to $95.99. (They say this is temporary, early bird pricing, but subscribing now locks you into this pricing forever.)

I would recommend this option if you have some cash to spare and you're really comfortable using Calibre or you're a nerd for making apps like BookFusion work. It works really well and is incredibly convenient once you get it set up (especially when you want to read on your phone or tablet offline), but even I, someone who works in tech support for a living, had some trouble with the initial sync and ended up duplicating every ebook in my BookFusion library, making for a very tedious cleanup session.

Option 4: On a Self-Hosted Server Using Calibre-Web

Do you enjoy unending confusion and frustration? Are you okay with throwing fistfuls of money down a well? Do you like putting in an incredible amount of work for something only you and maybe a few other people will ever actually use? If so, self-hosting Calibre-Web on your own personal server might be a good fit for you!

To be fair, this is likely an experience unique to me, because I am just technical enough to be a danger to myself. I can give a brief summary of how I did this, but I don't know nearly enough to explain to you how to do it.

Calibre-Web is a web app that works on top of Calibre, offering "a clean and intuitive interface for browsing, reading, and downloading eBooks."

I have a network-attached storage (NAS) server on which I run an instance of Calibre and Calibre-Web (through the miracle that is Docker). After the initial work of downloading all the fic I wanted to save and transferring it to the server, I'm now able to download all new fic pretty much via email thanks to FanFicFare, so updating my fic archive is mostly automated at this point.

If you're curious, this is what it looks like:

Pros: The interface is clean and intuitive, the ebook reader is fantastic. The Discover feature, in which you are given random books / fic to read, has turned out to be one feature worth all the irritation of setting up Calibre-Web. I can access, read, and download ebooks on any device, and I can even convert ebooks into another format using this interface. As I mentioned above, updating it with fic (and keeping the Docker container itself up to date) is relatively automated and easy now.

Cons: The server, in whichever form you choose, costs money. It is not cheap. If you're not extremely careful (and sometimes even if you are, like me) and a hard drive goes bad, you could lose data (and then you have to spend more money to replace said hard drive and time replacing said data). It is not easy to set up. You may, at various points in this journey, wish you could launch the server into the sun, Calibre-Web into the sun, or yourself into the sun.

Step Six: Profit!

That's it! I hope this was enough to get you moving towards archiving your favorite fanfic. Again, if there's anything here you'd like me to expand on, let me know! Obviously I'm a huge nerd about this stuff, and love talking about it.

[intricatechaosofyou]

The Right Wrong Turn

Pairing: Crosshair x f!reader

Fandom: The Bad Batch; Star Wars

Summary: A hiccup in the mission ends up with you on a rooftop with the Batch’s sniper. Using the prompt “This did not go the way I expected.”

Warnings: 18+!!!!, blasters, shootouts, cursing, some sexual tension, a couple of references to lines in season 3 but NO SPOILERS (tell me if you find my references though ;) !!)

Author’s note: Happy Bad Batch season my loves!! Our boys are back and I couldn’t be happier (or sadder). I had the privilege of writing for @urfriendlyneighbornightfury so I hope you enjoy this babe! I had so much fun writing it. Italics indicate small flashbacks. Also, please keep in mind that this is post-Echo but pre-Order 66.

The Bad Batch has meant so much to me over the years and while it feels like the end has come far too quickly, I’m grateful for everything it’s done for me and the rest of the Star Wars community! Thank you to @ghostofskywalker / @cloneficgiftexchange for putting on this event!! I’m so grateful to participate in this huge event!!

Sending everyone a Wrecker-sized hug and a happy season 3!! <3

━ ━ ━ ━ ━ ━ ━ ━ ━ ━ ━ ━ ━ ━ ━ ━ ━ ━

You panted as you made a sharp turn down an alleyway, trying to lose your pursuers.

It was supposed to be a simple mission: sneak in while Hunter and Wrecker distracted the guards, download a few files, then Echo and Tech would pick you all up in the Marauder.

What you hadn’t planned for, however, was the heavy encryption on the files you needed.

———————

“Tech, I thought you said I just had to plug this data stick in and the files would download!” You whispered into your comm as a red screen appeared on the datapad.

“Theoretically, that should be all you have to do. However, I do suppose the encryptions on the files could prevent the transfer,” Tech replied, his static voice from the comm making you angrier by the second.

Your failed attempts at transferring the files had set off the alarm. You needed to get out of there, but you needed those files first.

“Keep the data stick in,” Tech requested. “I can undo the encryption from my end and transfer the files manually.”

A blaster shot fired right past your shoulder and you immediately ducked behind the large desk in the office. Sneaking a look, you counted three guards with their blasters pulled on you.

Kriff. You had to get out of there.

“Cross,” you hissed into your comm as you pulled your blaster from its holster on your hip.

You didn’t even have to finish your sentence before you heard the sniper’s voice crackle through the comm.

“I’ve got eyes on them. I take middle.”

You couldn’t see him on the next rooftop over, but you knew he was already lining up his shot through the large glass window behind the desk you were hiding behind.

“No fair. I wanted middle this time,” you answered, a smirk forming on your face.

Crosshair tutted. “Too bad, sweets.”

You rolled your eyes as you shifted your blaster in your hands, getting ready to fire.

As soon as Crosshair’s shot came through, shattering the window behind you and killing the assailant in the middle, you stood and shot the two remaining.

“Tech, how’re we looking?” You questioned.

“Files are transferred. Make your way back to the Marauder.”

You grabbed the data stick and booked it to the stairs just as another group of guards bursted into the office.

———————

You thought that they’d give up once you exited the building, but they were still managing to follow you through the busy streets of Bracca.

It was getting harder to lose the guards behind you as you dashed through the streets. One wrong turn and you knew you were in deep trouble.

As you turned down the next alleyway in hopes that you’d finally outpace the guards you heard someone hiss your name.

Looking up you found Crosshair, leaning over the roof of a nearby building, hand outstretched to you.

“Hurry up before those di’kuts catch up.”

You smiled and grabbed his hand, allowing him to hoist you up onto the roof.

“Could’ve used some help earlier, Cro—“

The clone’s hand covered your mouth before you could finish your snarky comment, pushing you to lay down the cold metal roof as he followed suit, laying halfway on top of you as the guards flooded into the alley in pursuit of you.

He lowered his head, sharp eyes watching the guards, ensuring that they didn’t spot the two of you.

But you? You watched him.

He had shed his bucket before helping you onto the roof, granting you full freedom to ogle at his face. You watched the way his eyes darted across the length of the alley, the way jaw clenched every time a guard spoke, the way his lips were parted as he took slow, steady breaths.

Suddenly, the chill of the night was replaced with a heavy heat and you were overcome with the need to move out from under him.

The hard plastoid of his armor dug into your skin as you attempted to shift out from underneath him. But your movement only caused him to hold you down harder, his free hand pressing your hips down to keep you from squirming.

You stifled a frustrated groan, going to shift again but the way he turned to look at you made you freeze. He stared you down, almost daring you to move again.

Unfortunately for him, you loved getting under his skin.

You tried to shift out from under him again, accepting the unspoken challenge from the sniper.

He retaliated, pressing his entire forearm against your hips to prevent your movements.

With a huff, you realized this might be one battle you wouldn’t win. You resigned yourself to watching him again as he took a glance back at the alley.

When his eyes found yours again, he finally took his hand away from your mouth but his arm across your hips stayed in place.

“You nearly got us caught,” he hissed.

“Yeah, well, this didn’t go the way I expected,” you replied, a sarcastic smile on your face as you once again attempted to get out from under him.

The way he put more weight on your hips told you he wasn’t letting you go that easy. “What did you expect? That I’d just let you stand around up here and let the guards catch both of us?” He questioned.

“Stow it,” you demanded, trying to ignore the way your face felt hot. “We need to get back to the Marauder.”

“Not until you answer my question, sweets.”

You huffed, letting your head fall back. Maker, this man was stubborn. “Don’t call me that. You know I hate it.”

“Hate what, sweets?”

“You calling me that!”

“Why, sweets?”

You bit back a snarl at the way he emphasized the name just for the sake of driving you crazy. “I said stow it.”

“What’re you gonna do about it? I seem to have the upper hand, sweets.”

You hated the way his lips curled up into his signature smirk as the nickname left his mouth. Your hands acted on their own accord as they grabbed his face and crashed his lips onto yours. His response was automatic, hands coming to cradle your face to bring you closer to himself.

The kiss was a mess of tongue and teeth, both of you still in an attempt to win an imaginary battle against the other. He pushed you and you pushed back harder against him. Around and around you two went in desperate attempts to put the other in their place…until Crosshair’s comm sounded.

The sniper let out a discontented huff as your mouth left his as you pulled the comm from the belt at his hips.

“We’re still on a mission, sweets,” you reminded him, reveling in the way his jaw ticked as you used the nickname against him before turning back to the comm and assuring Hunter that you and Crosshair were en route to the Marauder. “We gotta get going.”

Despite his groaning, he still shifted off of you and offered you a hand to help you stand up.

You brushed yourself off and took in Crosshair’s usual frown. “Cheer up, Cross.”

“I don’t like being interrupted,” he replied, pulling a toothpick from the pocket on his belt.

Shrugging, you grabbed the toothpick from his hand and put it in your own mouth. “Don’t worry. We’ll finish this later.”

The corners of Crosshair’s mouth ticked up at your insinuation. “I like that plan, sweets.”

Although you rolled your eyes, you couldn’t help the fond smile from growing on your face. Instead of granting him a response you simply turned and started the trek back to the Marauder with Crosshair right beside you, his hand resting on the small of your back. Yeah, you’d definitely be finishing this later.

[citruscatfish]

one of the reasons why i downloaded tumbler — my ace attorney phase. i have feeling that nobody except tumbler ace attorney fandom are still alive

recently i watched great video about Franziska by @musashi and whole 2 hours i was like "YES YES SOMEBODY TALKED ABOUT IT THEY SAID EXACTLY WHAT I TRYING TO EXPLAIN TO ALL MY FRIENDS FOR THIS YEAR Y E S"

and well i think it's my turn to talk about Manfred. because i like this moron. before you ask me wtf let me explain: miles made unforgivable, stupid, aggressive and childish stuff. nobody can grew up in awful condition and become clearly good person. i like him because of his ambiguity. all fandom likes him. but i don't understand why everyone hate Manfred so easy

of course we don't know enough about him, his past, his relationship with family (i mean wife, for example). we only have different headcanons about how he raised miles and 'ziska. but.. it's strange for me why everyone accept so fast that "he is a villain, he is murderer, he must die, forget about him"

first of all, he is prosecutor, lawyer. probably hereditary. me too (seriously), and I saw mean, authoritative people, who can't communicate with their family well, but.. they still love them. you know, all that stuff about justice will settle in your soul forever, when you see courtroom, when you talk with other lawyers (your parents colleagues) from early childhood. you will never forget it, it's part of your life from the beginning. you can be mean, you can make awful mistakes, but you will remember. and probably your parents will press you with all this perfectionism, aesthetic, study and lawyer dynasty stuff. same as Manfred has been pressed, same as he pressed his children later

of course Manfred worked for victory, not only for justice. but i can't believe he did it because he e v i l. maybe he is just like miles in his youngest carrier because of demanding teacher and loathing to criminals? that's why he thought his children same stuff. he was just.. doing his duties. prosecutor must blame someone. somebody must get punished. death, especially violent, is always tragedy. relatives of victim are waiting for explanation, for punishment. it's so painful

next thing: Manfred is old. and he has toddler, and this toddler has noone exept Manfred, her father. i agree that Manfred could take miles because "ah look at me i adopted my rival's boy cause i'm SO generous and obviously NOT guilty ", but how about more reasons? another one child is always lots of work: money, school, adoption documents, this child also has a dog, so it's headache about vet, passport for transportation it to Germany, then dirt and maybe bitten furniture, food for both of them and more, more, more. we can see in anime, that Manfred allowed to take dog too. and by the way, he agreed to raise miles as prosecutor (he didn't force him), he helped him. quite possibly he gave him great education. Manfred understood, that Franziska need someone, who can protect and support her when he leaves her. he also can write it in testament

and how about AAI flashback? Manfred was ready to stay with miles during his first court. he discussed with him details before the beginning. he argued with detective to allow miles and 'ziska get to crime scene. he appointed them to investigate (no one of them asked about it directly, they were shocked and tried their best)

i think Manfred just another traumatized step of long von Karma dynasty. remember how Franziska hug herself when you press her against the wall? compare it to Manfred sprites. he is so self-defensive, when he loses control. controling everything around him — the only thing he can do now, when he became "that smart old person with lots of subordinates". and then Franziska remembered that and trying to repeat. i believe Manfred can be good in little things, he capable to love. i think he literally gone mad with understanding of what he has done on emotions and everyday pain, which reminds about that day

that's enough for first time, thanks for reading and sorry for my eng — it's my first non-translsted from native language text. waiting for your thoughts about it! this is my bf's art, he has no Tumblr, but tg https://t.me/bjdsketch

[lixiektty]

꒰ঌ cupid's cams : choi yeonjun ໒꒱ — prev ▸ next

word count: 2.5k, warnings/kinks: camboy!yeonjun, dom!yeonjun, sub!reader, language, unprotected sex, clit stimulation, praise, degradation, daddy kink, creampie, thigh slapping, dumbification, recording content for yj's OF, pls feel free to let me know if i missed anything!!

taglist: @hyynee, @enha-cafe, @xiaoderrrr, @lethallyprotected

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ cupid's cams masterlist

yeonjun knew sex like he knew the back of his hand. he was so good at it, too good that you began wondering about his experience. it didn't bother you that yeonjun seemed to know more than you did, it could just get uncomfortable when you tried taking the lead.

you were on the bed, playing games on yeonjun's phone as he cleaned the kitchen up and showered. having that trust always made you happy, even if all you did was help him with his daily quests on each game he had downloaded. you were having fun, until a notification popped up—someone replying to a tweet yeonjun posted. you didn't even think he had twitter.

'so hot 😍' it read.

your blood boiled, skin turning hot. jealousy. who could possibly be commenting on his posts? what did he post to receive such a comment? you felt guilty pressing on it but that didn't stop you. the twitter app opened, and you were met with the exact comment you saw that got you here under yeonjun's tweet.

'new vids up! subscribe for better content 😉💦' with a picture of his cock laying against his stomach.

it just didn't make sense. all this time yeonjun was basically a pornstar and you had no idea about it—and you knew for a fact that was your boyfriend's body, you've seen it way too much and know it all too well.

"alright, finally done babe. what're we watchin'?" yeonjun asked, entering the room with a big smile.

your expression didn't match though, you had tears swelling in your eyes when you looked up at him, cheeks burning with your hands shaking trying to hold the phone.

"baby?" yeonjun called out to you, noticing your discomfort.

"yeonju—un," you start, voice shaky and mind filled with everything but answers, answers you needed, "are you... selling yourself online?"

"give me that," yeonjun said, arm stretching to snatch the phone from your hands.

he looks down to see what you had come across, his heart falling straight to his ass. it wasn't that he didn't want to tell you, he just didn't know how to bring it up without possibily blowing things up.

"i do live streams once a week where i... you know... and people pay to see that," he admits, "and on my days off i post onlyfans content."

"when did you plan on telling me?" you asked, voice going out slightly.

"someday... it just wasn't easy," yeonjun says, coming to sit beside you on the bed. he looked down talking about the situation and that only hurt you more, "i been doing this for nearly three years and it ruined my last relationship, so i stayed single for a while and slept around."

a part of you had sympathy for him, even after being angry that he kept this from you for so long and possibly longer if you hadn't found out tonight.

"i just didn't want you to feel weirded out and make me quit or worse, leave me," he adds on. he sounded genuine and your heart broke at the fact that yeonjun didn't trust you because of his past.

"what makes you think me out of all people would judge you? i'm nothing like your past girlfriends, yeonjun. i know you, i trust you." you responded, reassuringly. you give gentle to rub his shoulder in a way of telling him you were no longer mad. of course, you didn't appreciate that he wasn't vocal about the secret occupation, but you understood why he wasn't, "and as long as it's only for the money and you're not secretly having feelings for all the people that give you it," you add.

"never," yeonjun turns his head, big eyes looking at you lovingly, "only you."

"okay," you reply. your worries faded away, leaving your body and turning into sudden need, "let's film something then."

"wai— what?" yeonjun's innocent and loving expression snapped into confusion.

"you need some content, don't you? i can help you out," you suggested, hand moving up and down his arm and perching up onto his shoulder.

his eyes shifted to a darker shade, heart nearly beating out of his chest. he didn't expect that him confessing would go well, especially not this well. everyday he worried about telling you, feared that you'd kick him to the curb and make him feel bad about himself—that fear was no longer present.

"god, you have never seemed hotter than you do right now," yeonjun said before chasing your lips and messily kissing you.

your arms wrap around his neck to pull him down with you on the matress, his limbs tangling with yours once your bodies mesh together. yeonjun didn't waste a single second, dipping his fingers into your shorts immediately and collecting your dripping essence.

a moan slips from your mouth straight into his, the pads of his fingers toying with your clit, teasing you more each time he moved lower with the tips of his fingers slightly entering you.

"fuck, j-jun, need you," you whine, jerking up into his palm.

yeonjun trails kisses along your jawline, down to your neck and collarbone, lips taking in some of your skin to suck roughly. his fingers moved in faster circles against your bud, causing him to feel more eager that his was gently humping your thigh as he grew harder.

you were whining needily, just wanting to feel his cock stretching you open. he sat up, pulling his hand out of your shorts, soon removing them from your body and spreading your legs for him to sit in between.

"so wet already, barely even touched you," he teases. bullshit.

your clit was throbbing in anticipation, hole opening and closing with each deep breath you took. yeonjun was in a hurry trying to get the knot in his sweatpants untied, his struggle being pretty obvious to you.

you sat up, replacing his hands with yours, taking the strings between your fingers and untying them slowly as you looked up at him with big eyes. fuck, if he wasn't already hard enough.

yeonjun bends down to kiss you, chin between his fingers. you were stripping him from his sweats and boxers, his cock sprung up and you were quick to grab ahold. you pumped it gently up and down then slowly falling back until your back hit the mattress, bringing yeonjun with you.

"have i told you how much i love you?" yeonjun breaks from the kiss—his pretty lips all pink and swole.

"many times," you giggle, "but i'd like if you showed me."

yeonjun grins, quick to take your hand off of him, snatch you shirt from you and angle his tip near your entrance. the light stretches from his cock being pushed further into you made your body feel ecstatic and you were clinging onto him in an instant.

no matter how many times yeonjun fucked you, you'd still feel numb with each inch that entered you, surprised from his size but taking it so well.

"daddy's tight little pussy feels so good every time," yeonjun whispers into your ear, leaving a wet kiss behind.

yeonjun draws his hips back, pushing back into you and repeating this until you cry out for more. his fingers meet your clit again as he fucked you slightly faster. you were moaning loud, causing yeonjun's ears to ring—but he didn't even mind, the sounds you made because of his doing was like an ego boost.

this soon reminds him of your suggestion, before you two had even got here in the first place. he was letting his dick think too much for him that he completely forgot your original agreement.

he sits up and takes your hips into his hands to keep you steady once he picked up the pace, making you clench down on his cock tightly.

"lights, camera, action, my love," yeonjun says, picking up his phone and switching to the camera app.

yeonjun clicks the red button, beginning to record the sight, so sinful and messy. he smiles watching your pussy take his cock on his phone that captured it so well.

"fuck baby, look so fucking hot taking my dick like this," he says. you'd think it was all talk for the camera if wasn't for how he already acted during your times alone.

he was filthy, loved expressing how he was feeling and giving you a verbal visualization of what he could see at the moment. to see you like this as he records, knowing he'd get to keep it for himself gave him—this new rush of adrenaline and he's soon pounding into your dripping cunt, unholy noises echoing off the four walls surrounding you.

your hands scrambled any and everywhere to find something to claw onto, finding yeonjun's waist and sinking your nails deep. yeonjun let out a gasp, strangely enjoying this newfound pain that didn't necessarily hurt—it felt good. really fucking good.

"oh, baby," he moans breathlessly.

you couldn't see him due to your eyes being snapped shut and you could just barely open them, but you knew he looked good. sweaty and strong as he fucked you into bliss.

"har—harder," you sigh, both your hands now clawing at his abdomen.

you sounded so cute when you'd beg, felt even better when he knew you wanted to be more verbal for the sake of the content—loud and uncontrollable moans even louder now that you were being filmed.

yeonjun slid his thighs from under your to further get comfortable and fuck you properly. you were now lying flat against the mattress, thighs spread and his fingers on your sensitive bud. he pulled his hips back, slamming back into you repeatedly, "such a slut for daddy, aren't you?"

"mhm—" you hum in response, yelping when yeonjun slaps your inner thigh.

"words." he warns through his teeth.

"yes, daddy," you moan, hips jerking up to feel more friction.

yeonjun being mean to you did something to you that you couldn't explain, it was hard to in words. he was already hot, but he was so much hotter when speaking to you like that—making you feel so guilty for being a slut, something he turned you into.

not a day went by where you didn't think about his bare skin on display for you as he's drilling into you with his fat cock, reaching every spot inside you as possible.

you both admired each other with no clothes on, that's why most of the time they were off. something about your tits pressed against his chest, close in all ways gave him joy because he knew he only got this. this made him cocky, treating your body like no other and knowing he's the only one that can feel you this way.

yeonjun didn't try to hold back any longer, going from low grunts to even louder groans. he was destroying you in the best way possible, not even just because you were being recorded, but because you most definitely deserved it. he has never had someone like you, someone so supportive and loving, making him feel like the only man in the world and fucking him good while doing so.

his followers were infact aware of his relationship status, but he kept that part of himself private. he only ever posted and talked about himself, never hooked up with someone else only for onlyfans content before you two got together. even now, he felt like he was taking away some of your privacy because he genuinely did keep you secret for the most part.

yeonjun could feel himself repeatedly twitch inside you, warm walls feeling incredible sucking him in and dripping more by the second. you felt brain dead, drooling from the mouth and high-pitched moans escaping your throat.

the room was hot, you weren't sure if it was just your skin or it was the mixture of sweaty bodies and hot breaths that caused the room to warm up how it did.

you could feel that knot in your stomach grow tighter and tighter, you were a moaning mess, babbling some incoherent things but yeonjun knew that meant you were enjoying it because you were turning stupid.

"dumb little slut, so hungry for me," yeonjun says, a whimper falling from his mouth when you clench again. he was plowing into like he'd be the last time, you just felt even better than you have before that it was driving yeonjun insane, "shit, i'm gonna cum—want it, baby?"

"so, s—s bad, p-please fill me up daddy," you struggle to say, which pushed him further—he appreciated your manners even when you could barely talk.

he grins, only something you could see, with his hand all over you to touch every inch of your torso as possible. his other hand was gripping tightly on his phone where he watch the scene rip before his eyes. your breasts bounced with each aggressive thrust he sent into you.

"daddy—" you whine, your brain was so fuzzy that his name was the only thing that came to mind along with swears falling from your mouth.

yeonjun grunted, louder and louder until he got to his high. so very close and he just wanted to feel you full of his cum, belly bulging from the amount he was soon to let out. his size already doing that and the camera catching it so well.

"so fucking sexy," yeonjun slurred his words, grabbing the back of one of your thighs and pushing your knee to your chest.

you felt him twitch again, thrusts get sloppy. he circled his hips and hit your g-spot roughly, cursing a few more times and then painting your velvet walls.

"oh my god—" you cry out, hands going down to stop him from moving further but he just kept the same pace.

you came in an instant, the fullness yeonjun was providing you overwhelming you. the sounds he made too—he sounded so god damn good.

"mhm, cum baby~" yeonjun cooed, "just like that, such a good whore for your junnie."

you lost track of your breathing, not knowing how to do a thing. he fucked you dumb daily, yet this was different—the fact that he had a camera on you capturing it all for anyone to watch but at the end of the day, you were only his, and he treated your body with such care even when being rough.

yeonjun catches his breath, turning off his phone and throwing it to the side. he leans down and kisses you, your arms and legs wrapping around his long stature.

"you... are so fucking amazing," yeonjun praises, kissing your nose, "i'll be more honest from now on, like i have something else to confess..." it scared you because, what else could he be hiding? your anxiety drifted away once you saw that beautiful smile of his play along his face, "that was probably the best sex we've ever had," he admits.

"glad we think alike, choi," you smile, pecking his nose as he did to you and soon his pouty lips. it was gentle but messy, having the urge to clench on his cock that had begun softening.

"are you leading me on so i'll fuck you again, hm?" he tilted his head slightly, dark gaze burning a hole through you.

"not that i'm asking for it," you trail on, trying to look away and hide your smile and light teasing you were so obviously doing to him.

yeonjun grew hard again from your clenching, thrusting up into you and grabbing your body until it was pressed against his, arm wrapped tightly around your waist, "oh you're asking for it."

[echobx]

Timeloop - JJ Maybank × fem!reader part 2

summary: y/n meets JJ for the first time and she doesn't know that it will turn her whole life upside down, literally

warnings: none

word count: 1k

author's note: this is so short but I promise I have a vision. pls be patient with me 😭

masterlist part 1

There's a certain type of person in this world who only thinks of themselves, only wishes the best for their own good, not caring about anyone else, ever. And no matter how much I pride myself to not be this person, my actions have made me into a person like that. Selfish. Egotistical. Narcissistic, maybe.

It starts on a Tuesday, perfect sunshine, warm, bearable 72 °F with a light breeze that is blowing through the trees next to our new house. My room is filled with boxes, most of which contain stuff that I won't even need here. Too warm for that. But I spend my day unpacking, anyway. It's a fresh start, and my parents could have picked a way worse place to live than the Outer Banks.

“Y/n, we're going out for dinner. Come on down!” My mom yells from the foot of the stairs, and I quickly grab my phone and my headphones before running downstairs to meet her. It's just my dad, my mom and my little sister. We left the rest of the family behind, not that I am looking forward to seeing them again at Thanksgiving…

“Can you take the headphones off, honey? We're trying to have dinner,” my dad complains after we sat down and a girl around my age hands us each a menu.

“Hi, I'm Kiara, I'll be your waitress for the night. Welcome to the Wreck,” she says, with a forced smile. “Just call me over when you're ready to order.” And as quickly as she appeared, she's gone again. My eyes follow her inside the establishment, where she starts to talk to a group of boys. One of them turns his head to look at me. Tall, blonde, muscly but not scary looking. And as quickly as his gaze was on me, it's gone again.

After dinner, we make our way out of the restaurant, and while my dad pays, I turn to look back at the boys. They are still just hanging out in a corner, joking around and not paying any mind to the people around them. I like how careless they are, how free.

“Honey?” my mom speaks up and rips me out of my thoughts, pulling me with her towards the door and away from the boys.

The next day, I wake up with a headache. My diary is lying on my face and I have ink stains on my fingers.

A shower helps with the stains and lifts my headache just enough to let me survive breakfast, so I think. But my mother has different ideas.

All morning, she keeps asking me why I was so interested in those boys the night prior, and I really don't have a good answer for her. Maybe because they didn't have parents around them all the time. Maybe the fact that they seemed somewhat mysterious still. Maybe, just maybe, I had, for the first time, actually found someone interesting with a single look, and not because I had to dissect their personality to find the bits that complimented my own.

“I don't know, mom. I don't even know who they are. Can you please let it go,” I huff after she posed another question.

“Fine. Did you finish with your room?” she asks instead, and I sigh in relief.

“Yes. Well… I only need a few poster strips and stuff to decorate, but I'll go buy something later.”

“Sounds lovely,” my dad notes, his eyes solely fixed on his tablet while reading the paper.

“Anything new in the world?” I ask and take another bite of my toast.

“Nothing too important. You can read it yourself if you'd download the app,” he replies.

“Oh no, she can't. Y/n has too many pictures of ugly men on her phone. No storage for news,” my little sister laughs loudly, and I wish to sink down into the core of our planet earth. As if having a five year younger sister isn't already punishment enough. That's also not true. I love my sister, but she also drives me crazy with her 11-year-old brain.

“I'll read it later on my laptop,” I say and my dad just nods.

Getting out of the house feels like finally being able to breathe again. I have learned to take my diary with me everywhere I go, not wanting to have last year's incident repeated where my sister took my diary to school and read it aloud to all of her friends and word had gotten around and soon after every teenager in my area had known my secrets. And not even the funny ones. No, my sister had decided to only share the most embarrassing part of my life. For example the fact that I follow a strict protocol when talking to anyone, even my closest friends at the time. And they all had made fun of me, or mocked me or just called me all kinds of vile things because of it.

But that doesn't matter now because this is a new start. I'll find better friends. Preferably ones who I don't have to pretend for. Ones that don't make me feel the need to script out conversations long before they happen.

“Woah, easy there, princess,” a voice rips me out of my thoughts, firm hands grasping my shoulders. “You good? You nearly ran into that shelf.”

“I'm fine, thank you,” I mumble before picking up my head, blinking twice, and a third time. He's even prettier from up close. Disheveled blonde hair falling into his face that is adorned by the bluest eyes I have ever seen. Perfectly matched to his pointy nose and the pink lips.

His eyebrows furrow and I look away, hearing him clear his throat and feeling him drop his hands.

“Thank you for that,” I mumble and smile while looking down, too scared that I might get lost if I look at him for too long.

“Yeah, it's no problem, at all,” he drags out his words and takes a step back. “Just be careful next time.”

I nod, and he's gone, but I'm still nodding. Fate isn't something in my area of expertise. I have never had any luck of any sort whatsoever. But running into him the day after seeing him for the first time- Maybe there truly is something out there that plays our cards, and it played mine just right.

please don't copy and/or post my work onto other platforms! ~e©ho

taglist: @redhead1180 @spideysimpossiblegirl @drwstarkeyy @princessmaybank @ijustwantttoread @kys4-20 @immyowndefender @julczimocarz @m2m2m2 @th3eternalersi @chiaraanatra @yourmumstoy

[fairycosmos]

i’m going to kill myself tonight but i wanted to say i’ve always loved your blog and your my favourite tumblr person :)

hey, not sure if anything i can say can change your mind but please please consider calling a hotline or reaching out to a friend/family member if that's an option. i won't pretend i know the type of pain you're in, or much about the situation you're in, and i hope this doesn't come across as me saying it's easy to keep going because it's absolutely not. whether you're feeling numb, whether your thoughts are totally chaotic. it's a type of hell either way. i know things are unbearably painful so much of the time. you deserve so much better and i just don't think doing this is going to give you that. i'm not trained in all the right and wrong things to say to someone who's going through this and i know that when i'm in this place myself, there's very little anyone can do or say to get me out of it. but i do come out of it. even if i'm not happy, the pressing urge to harm myself is so strong that by its own nature it's unsustainable. it's the hardest thing in the world to bear it and i'm so sorry you're going through it. it's so fucking exhausting. and at the same time it always somewhat dies down and there is always another day to try again.

please, please get yourself to a physically safe space. if you need to cry, break down, sleep for 72 hours, take a shower, eat something, put your face in cold water, rip up a million pieces of paper to get the rage out - it's okay. whatever you need is okay. you don't have to think about what you're going to do tomorrow or next week or next month or in the next 5 years. you just have to focus on getting through today, minute by minute. if that feels like too much, second by second. and you can keep breaking it down like that until it stops feeling like some insurmountable mountain. i know words are not enough to change anything about how much despair and hopelessness you're feeling in this moment. i just want you to attempt to treat yourself the way you'd treat a friend going through something like this. even just for the next 30 minutes. i'm going to leave some resources linked below that have helped me when i've been in a similar spot. they're not solutions and they're not cures. they're just going to allow you to see other perspectives beyond your suicidality. you are so, so worth that. please reach out to a loved one, the authorities or a hotline if you can. it is not going to be as scary as your mind is building it up to be. i would seriously hate to think of you doing something to harm yourself. you have a right to feel how you feel, but you don’t have to give these thoughts the power to actually dictate your reality. i'm really, really glad you're alive and i genuinely hope you're able to get to the point where you are too. you're the one who can really bring yourself back from the edge. what happens next is all in your hands, not in the grip of your negative thoughts, urges, or feelings. please, please do what you know is right for your safety and wellbeing. even if it's the hardest choice in the world to make. please, please stick around for today at the very least. just focus on getting through the now, no matter how unbearable. that's more than good enough, and it's all anyone can ask of you. i'm sending you so, so much love.

international suicide hotlines / guidance for creating a safety plan / coping with suicidal thoughts pdf / download a how to cope factsheet / coping with suicidal thoughts right now / 10+ coping skills worksheets for adults / the coping skills toolbox / how do you stop suicidal thoughts?

[octuscle]

My friend’s in search of a pool boy for August. He recently told me to download this Chronoviac app to help him look. We’re buds, so I agreed, even though I suspect by “pool boy” he just wants me to keep an eye out for twunks. But while I thought it would be like Craigslist or maybe Uber or something, the link he sent me just has one big button: “ACTIVATE SCENARIO”. Am I supposed to press that? Am I doing this right?

It's early in the morning. You still have some time before you have to go to work, so you can have a look at it. And hey, it's your buddy, what can happen? Push the button!

If you need to think, it's best to go for a run first. That clears your head. And obviously you need a clear head. Since when do you go running in the morning? You have running shorts and top hanging above your desk chair. There are running shoes in the hallway with not-so-fresh socks in them. You are really confused. But your morning 10-kilometre run is clearly in your mind's eye. So you get ready and start running.

Fuck, that was a good time for the distance. You are in top form today. A quick protein shake and then get into your hybrid Hyundai and off to work. It's really hard for you to concentrate at your desk today… For one thing, it's hard for you to sit still and not move. On the other hand, you find the air conditioning incredibly stuffy. Fortunately, as the day goes on, you receive fewer and fewer enquiries about the planning figures for the next year. Instead, you are asked every now and then to look for a blocked drain or a defective socket. Actually, that's not the job of controlling now. But you are happy when you can get out and move around.

During your lunch break you go to the company gym. There's usually no one there at that time. But only losers take lunch. A big protein shake after training is enough for you. When you go to your locker after training, your suit is gone. Dios mio, you think, why is there an overall with "Janitor Marques" hanging in the locker? You get annoyed every time that your engineering master's degree from the Dominican Republic is not accepted here. You studied climate engineering. And you graduated with honours. And here you are allowed to refill toilet paper and repair the flush. Fucking gringos. And the money isn't even enough for a decent life. But luckily your little pool service business is doing quite well. Someone was looking for help on the noticeboard at the gym. The guy who advertised the job sounds chilled out and you can even use the pool by arrangement. In return, you have to maintain the equipment, clean the pool and the terrace and occasionally help out at pool parties. At the university in Santo Domingo, you were a popular DJ at student parties. Maybe you can do the same here.

After work, you hop in your pickup truck and drive to the guy looking for pool service. The interview goes close and smoothly. Finally, your new client, who is a pretty hot guy, asks if you'd like to try out the pool. And takes off his shirt. You follow his example without hesitation. The first pool party can begin!

[theladyragnell]

Number 2 for the leverage ot3? Thanks :)

(Eye contact across a crowded room! This one was weirdly hard to write, because it mostly came to me as a little episode snippet but unfortunately I cannot download videos from my head to yours, but ah well, c'est la vie.)

Eliot knows what it’s like to have a team.

Been a long time since he had one, since he got weaned off having a team when they realized his killer instincts were more useful on offense than defense, and everything since then has been temporary, based on contract or control or cash, but it still comes back. He’ll never say it, doesn’t even want to think it, but it’s his natural state, standing between someone else and trouble. He’s been doing it a long time.

Some of the finer points, though, those get lost in a long time away. The way he gets really damn annoyed when he’s trying to listen to a job plan and someone won’t stop making judgy comments about his guacamole not being like their Nana used to make it. The way he wakes up sometimes feeling like he missed a step on the stairs because he’s not sure where one of them is. The way, in a room full of people, he always knows where they are, like markers on a map.

This isn’t a hard part of the job. Eliot is just there as backup for Sophie, and everybody else is playing safe roles, the kinds they can just disappear into, service staff mostly, but Eliot still knows where they are without looking. Parker by the drinks table swapping out a tray. Hardison badly fixing the event space’s sound system that he sabotaged earlier so they’d have to call him in. Sophie doing that annoying socialite laugh that follows her from identity to identity. Nate pretending to be messily drunk but having to pretend less than he should, getting ready to spill something on the mark.

They’ve all got their own ways of keeping eyes out, Eliot doesn’t pretend that’s some superpower only he’s got, but he’s pretty sure, with the kind of comfortable knowledge of his own skills that his training gave him, that he’s the best at it. Hardison might think he is, but Hardison needs an earbud and a screen to do it.

That’s why he knows a second before everybody else does that the job is about to go wrong. He knows Parker’s too far from an easy escape route, that Sophie’s too close to the mark’s security, that Hardison’s in a nest of wires that will trip him, right when Nate does his trip and Eliot realizes the most competent security guard, who was supposed to be off tonight, came in with food poisoning.

Sophie isn’t blown. Nate isn’t blown. But Parker and Hardison, they tend to do the little one-note grifts to set up the bigger con, and this guard is the kind of person who makes note of new delivery drivers on his routes, an intern who only lasts one day. Eliot looks at Parker first, and finds her looking back, already waiting for him to make the play. It’s taken more than a year for her to trust him like this, but she does, she’s Eliot’s responsibility and he’s not going to leave her out to dry.

“Catering emergency in three,” Hardison says in Eliot’s ear, and Eliot glances over at him, too, finds him looking back. Of course his facial recognition would pay off a second after Eliot figured it out. He’ll even be smug about it later.

But they’re all fast. That’s why they all make a good team, and especially why the three of them make a good team. Eliot might have known first, but he doesn’t have to explain it to any of them. They all know how to handle this. It just takes a moment of connection to make sure they’re on the same page, and when Hardison looks away, it’s to catch Parker’s eye, all three of them syncing up while Nate starts drunkenly stammering his way through an apology to the mark.

“Two,” says Hardison.

“I’ve got the guard,” says Eliot, already moving, taking his eyes off Parker and Hardison, trusting them to get through the next steps.

“One,” says Parker, already moving when the kitchen fire alarm goes off, Hardison using the excuse to panic and flail and sever a wire that kills some of the event lighting, and Eliot moves into the well-practiced dance knowing he’s standing between them and danger.

[zealouscanonindeer]

Midnight tryst

Book : Kali flame of samsara

Pairing: Ram Doobay x Devi Sharma

Warning: none

Rating : Teen

Authors note : In my hc, Ram and devi start meeting in secret two years before the whole Lord's wife shebang.

Also, writing after a whole 6 months so forgive the rustiness but I couldn't resist writing for these lovelies. I just recently downloaded rc and this was the second book I started. Hope you like this!

**********

I let out a slow breath, loathed to make a single sound at the expense of my rendezvous. Looking out through the corridor door, I gathered my sari running across to slip out of the estate. I began making my way towards Kalighat.

Since the durga puja ceremonies were to start the next day, everyone was camped out at a nearby estate belonging to the Basu's. Ever since the attack in the himalayas, a similar gathering of all members of the dozen evoked fear of history repeating itself. This meant increased security, which meant it was a mammoth task to slip out every night. But the reward was far greater than the risk.

Slowing down as I neared the garden, I looked around, my eyes searching for a familiar silhouette in the moonlight. my eyebrows drew together as I concentrated, I daren't reveal myself just yet, when a sudden weight came to rest on my shoulder.

I screamed involuntarily and my heart clenched in fear of having woken someone but the sound was muffled by a palm firmly pressed against my mouth. I turned around in horror only to stare at a smirking Doobay. I whisper screamed at him.

"Ram! you..you rakshasa! what was that! somebody could have heard me! don't you..woah!" my words died mid sentence as he pulled me against him, his hands wrapping around me tightly as I forgot his misgivings momentarily.

" Don't berate me. I simply forgot." he pulled away so I could see him point to his grey coloured eye. Of course, he didn't know what is felt like to be caught by surprise. I rolled my eyes, gently pushing him away and walking towards the enormous tree in the center.

Turning around I plopped myself onto the slightly damp grass as he followed. He wore a simple white kurta and matching dhoti, lined by a stripe of gold embroidery. His hair fell in thick dark locks and he was devoid of any jewellery expect the doobay family ring.

I smiled and patted the space next to me as he settled in, pulling my hand into this slender long fingers and squeezing it slightly. I sighed, scooching closer to rest my head against his shoulder as the scent of him enveloped me.

He ran a hand over my head, gently stroking my hair as he pulled the locks back away from my face, over my shoulders. Leaning down he kissed me slowly, taking his time as his tongue entered my mouth. We eventually broke apart, relenting to the need for air.

Lowering us onto the grass, I propped myself onto my elbow as he lay flat on his back. He closed his eyes, running a hand down my back, coming to rest against the bare skin of my lower back. His touch felt warm, soothing and intense.

Feeling his gaze on me, I looked back at him as he voiced.

"So, how did things go? "

"The journey was a success albeit way too long for my liking but we were able to clear up everything at the mines there and start business anew. It does look promising. " I said as I came to rest on his chest, his hand wrapping involuntarily around my shoulder.

"I never had any doubt. " He replied kissing my head.

"But I did miss you. " I confessed.

"I know. "

We lay there in companionable silence, the wind rustling the branches and the flowers settling on the ground as they broke away from their supports. Moving his hand gently from underneath me, he got up pushing himself into a seated position and busying himself with something I couldn't see.

I closed my eyes, feeling content when I felt his fingers wrap around my ankle, bringing my sole to his lips he gently kissed it, once twice moving on to the inside of my leg, first my ankle then upwards finally reaching the inside of my knee. I let out a subdued moan, small whimpers escaping unknowingly at his touches.

To my disappointment, he stopped and I sat up on my elbows to find out why.

"What happened? "

"You're a little too loud for your own good. " He chided me. I flushed crimson at his comment, shrugging of my embarassment I reached out to him, pulling him on top.

"It's time for you to go back. " He whispered against my skin

“Not yet. " I retaliated, almost pleading him not to send me away. He chuckled lightly pulling us both into a sitting position, his hands grabbed a few flowers and then, he wrapped a handmade anklet gently around my left ankle.

I stared at him and he did not shy away,nor did I expect him to. It was not his nature to hide away his feelings or want,it seemed that shameless acceptance was the bedrock of the Doobay charisma. He waited patiently as I finally but sadly stirred, standing up and pulling him into a hug. His lips attached to mine once more, parting to allow each other entrance. The sweet hot kiss ended all too soon.

“ You're sure you want me to leave"

"Not at all."

I departed in thought ,wishing that this could become more. But as it always is, good things must come to an end.. I stared at the flowers gently sitting on my skin. I could only hope that it was because better things would fall into place.

********

Correct me if I'm wrong but I read somewhere that wearing an anklet on your left leg indicates you are in a committed relationship.

[klaineccfanficlibrary]

Hello To All!

Hope you all are enjoying your weekend! I read on my phone and I’m not able to find stories. If there’s a way, please tell me how.

Please suggest adult stories for me with a great/happy ending. I prefer chapter stories of adult Klaine. Any suggestions are welcome. Need something to read tonight. Thank you for all you do!

Hello, when I search from my phone, I go onto our libary blog and into the "magnifying glass/search" at the top. I type in a particular word like "adult" or "enemies to lovers" and then a whole lot of previously recommended fics appear. Alternatively download A03 app, and you can search and filter on it.

Also on AO3 check out our 2023 Klainebingo which has 191 tagged stories written 2016-23 that fandom have recommended - not all adult klaine, but definitely worth looking at.

What I've done is made a list of recommendations here of some of Klaine fics I've enjoyed, where they are adults, or mostly post college age. Some newer, some older. ~ Jen

Seven by @scatterthestars

How far would you go for someone you love? For Kurt, that means doing the unimaginable. But if it means saving his dad, he's willing to take that risk. A risk that has him leaving his home to go states away to spend a week with the last person he ever expected to meet. Over the course of the next seven days, things don't go as planned, or thought.

Can seven days change everything?

~~~~~

Feel my heart's intention by @kurtsascot

Blaine started to hate Kurt on his first day. And it was a shame, really, because they could have been cute together. 

~~~~~

Falling for You By @caramelcoffeeaddict Coffeeaddict80

A fic written based off a mash-up of these two prompts from the @gleepotluckbigbang prompt page -- Prompt1: During rehearsal I tripped and fell into the orchestra pit and landed on you Prompt2: I have to share a dressing room with the most obnoxious, self-centered jerk; and when you sent flowers to our dressing room, they took them assuming they were for them but they were really for me Featuring: Broadway!Kurt, PianoPlayer!Blaine, Obnoxious!Broadway!Sebastian

~~~~~

Rock, paper, scissors by @gleefulpoppet

Kurt and his seven-year-old daughter are moving from the hustle and bustle of New York to the Rocky Mountains for a fresh start. On a connecting flight from Atlanta, they meet a warmhearted man who captures their attention with his enthusiasm. Will they ever see him again? And even if they do, how will he fit into their new life?

~~~~~

Nashville! by @hkvoyage

Kurt lands the lead role in a new musical, but it flops during the previews. However, his performance captivates Nashville’s newest country music sensation. They share an instant connection and it grows deeper as they get to know each other. Will Kurt be able to save the musical and keep the man of his dreams? An AU meeting featuring country singer!Blaine and Broadway!Kurt.

~~~~~

Made to keep your body warm by @quizasvivamos

Blaine is a meteorologist who works as a weatherman for a local New York news station where he's especially well-known for predicting storms. But, when a huge nor'easter blows in and the news crew is trapped at the station for three days by snow, can he predict what happens when he meets a young new intern?

~~~~~

If music be by @blurglesmurfklaine

Kurt’s just trying to survive his last semester of college, which means making it through student teaching in one piece.

~~~~~

In my place by @heartsmadeofbooks

Blaine has always been shy and introverted, so after his father dies, he looks for comfort into his childhood dream - owning a bookstore. But then Kurt Hummel walks into his life, turning his dream into a complicated affair.

~~~~~

These inconvenient fireworks by @redheadgleek

After an unexpected Tony award, Kurt Hummel is Broadway's hottest up and coming star, which comes with expectations and some admirers that won't take a hint. When his best friend Elliott Gilbert suggests that they pretend to date to get the leeches to back off, Kurt takes him up on the idea. It's all working out great - until Kurt starts to fall hard for the dark-haired music director of his latest musical.

~~~~~

Scenes from December by @spaceorphan18

An exploration of Kurt's life throughout various Decembers. The story of family and how the definition of family changes over time.

~~~~~

Home away from home by @lilyvandersteen

Cooper buys a hotel sight unseen and asks Blaine to run it for him over the summer. Only, the hotel is a health and safety hazard and Inspectors Hummel and Abrams are hell-bent on closing it down. Can Blaine spruce the hotel up in time and save Cooper's investment?

~~~~~

Living Haphazard by anna_timberlake @shame-is-a-wasted-emotion

Have you ever thought of getting cheated by a house broker and getting to know that you had to stay with another stranger who was also cheated? What if you are getting stuck up with the stranger in the apartment due to unavoidable circumstances? What if you hate him as well as have a crush on him? What if you had to fight your inner self and the stranger? What if he agreed on helping you which can only happen in dreams? This is a real living haphazard, isn't it?

~~~~ Someone like you by @iconicklaine

Kurt and Blaine keep up their very own version of "When Harry Met Sally" for years, a friendship fraught with sexual tension and longing, until the agendas of Adele (yes, THE Adele), a bored NY socialite and a super-sweet hetero couple bring our boys together. The only problem is... they're both in committed relationships.

Note: This story is AU after "Sexy" and assumes Kurt and Blaine graduate from Dalton in the same year. In this future fic, set in 2025, Blaine is based off of Season 2 Blaine. Originally posted on LJ and S&C.

~~~~~

The Journeying By @flowerfan2

Freshly graduated from music school, Blaine is thrilled when he is chosen to stay in the cast when the production of Into the Woods he was lucky enough to be part of in Boston moves to Broadway. He knows it’s going to be hard returning to New York City – the scene of his epic breakup with his fiancé and the emotional meltdown which cost him his place at NYADA. But he’s determined that this time, everything will be different. Little does Blaine know that out of thousands of potential castmates, his director has chosen none other than Kurt Hummel to play the part of Jack. Blaine has worked hard to recover from their breakup three years ago, and struggles to find a new way to relate to Kurt and simultaneously protect himself, especially when tragedy strikes.

This story looks at what would have happened if Kurt and Blaine had reacted differently to the break up in 6x01 than they did in canon; if events hadn’t brought them back together as soon, and if forgiveness hadn’t come so easily.

[mama-qwerty]

Robo Knuckles

Okay, a bit of discord writing. Something something, Knuckles is either turned into a robot, or his entire personality and everything that makes him who he is is downloaded into one. Think Metal Sonic, but in this case the bot kinda IS Knuckles. In a way.

I don't remember if we said this was by Eggman, but I don't think it was. Some other group of scientists or something. I dunno.

ANYWAY, this takes place years and years in the future, when Silver finds the long abandoned base where Robo-Knux is still living, his protective and guardian instincts still driving him.

This was started (as a number of these things usually are) by @nights-nonsensical-ramblings, and then I took it over because my brain went GIMME GIMME. I've noted the different places that Night contributed.

Night

As soon as Silver starts fixing up the old base the robot starts to assist. On closer inspection he can see that the robot has been trying to keep this place maintained, but it’s been a losing battle. The stubborn loyalty to his home reminds Silver of the original Knuckles, and he can’t help but feel deja vu from when he’s watched Knuckles work on Angel Island.

But that’s for another day. He still needs to help this poor abandoned robot and he promises he’ll return with more supplies to help fix the base tomorrow.

And for the first time in many many years a promise of fixing is kept.

Me

As they work together to get the place semi-functional again, the robot seems to be more eager to help. He's often standing at the front, waiting for Silver to come back. He doesn't speak, and Silver can't figure out if it's because his audio circuits are damaged, or if he simply can't.

Memories of Metal Sonic flicker through his mind, but Silver dismisses them quickly. This robot doesn't seem to have any ill intent. He actually does seem to be very much like the Knuckles he remembers.

Over time systems are brought back online. Lights flicker to life. Computers long dead blink awake. Silver isn't as good at technology as Tails was, but he can manage. He flicks through various programs, most of which are of no use or long since defunct. Until he finds the one pertaining to the robotic guardian.

Night

The robot stands beside him as he opens it, watching and observing him as he often does when there’s no task to be done. Silver found it creepy at first, but the robot’s gaze seemed oddly soft, like he was both curious and keeping a watchful eye over him.

Me

A lot of the files are corrupted. Silver can't tell the origin of the metal being next to him, but ultimately decides it didn't really matter. He was here now, what point was there to discovering how he'd come to be? The hedgehog decides to search for diagnostics and schematics instead, trying to make sure his new friend is functioning properly.

It's slow going. Silver isn't really technically inclined, and he needs the robot's help to decipher what a lot of the symbols and labels mean. Through trial and error they slowly begin repairing the metal guardian. Fixing some mobility glitches, patching a few frayed wires. They work for days on what appears to be a vocal speaker. Silver nearly fries the robot's ocular input sensors as he attempts to access the necessary components, and that scares the hedgehog so much he backs off, not wanting to do anything more.

Silver's retreated to the far end of the room, arms hugged around himself. What was he doing?? He wasn't Tails, he didn't know anything about machines, this robot trusted him and he'd nearly caused unfixable damage! He should go. Why was he here anyway? This place didn't exactly seem to be a threat, it wasn't useful to keeping the rest of the world safe. Why was he wasting so much time here? Just because this robot looked like someone he used to know?

Heavy footsteps behind him, drawing closer. He turned, and found the robot echidna mere feet from him. His singular functioning LED eye—the one Silver almost damaged—flickered softly as it locked with Silver's own.

"I don't know what I'm doing," Silver said, and he wasn't sure why he spoke aloud. He wasn't even sure if the robot could hear or understand him. "I don't want to hur—damage you any more than you already are."

The echidna-bot stared for a long moment, before reaching forward and taking gentle hold of Silver's wrist. The bot pulled Silver back to the computer terminal, gesturing to continue.

Silver hesitated. The robot stared, tilting its head toward the console. When the hedgehog still didn't move, the bot reached forward and turned him more square before the computer, and gave a little shove.

A little smile curled Silver's lips. It didn't just look like Knuckles. It seemed to have the same impatience, too.

"You sure?" His voice was soft, with a hint of shake. He really didn't want to mess anything else up. "I might make things worse."

The robot gave a curt nod, before pointing with its large metal mitt.

Silver heaved a sigh, before turning back toward the computer. "Okay. Let's do this."

Hours later. Through careful examination, meticulous comparing the picture on the monitor with the innards of the robot, and more than one near panic attack, Silver worked to repair the metal being.

They'd searched through drawers and cabinets, and managed to find a replacement LED for his . . . its right eye. It was bright green instead of violet, but it worked. The bot gave him a thumbs up when it flickered online.

The voice box was more intricate, and the two had argued over the design. Silver managed to remove what he thought was the speaker, but the robot kept gesturing toward the monitor, pointing at a different area.

"That's in your back, why would your voice box be there?"

The robot pointed almost angrily.

"I see it but that doesn't look like what we need!"

More pointing. A loud whirring sound emanated from its chest. It sounded almost like a growl.

"I don't think that's . . . ugh FINE. I'll check it out."

The bot nodded and turned to allow Silver access. The hedgehog was only doing this to show this stubborn bot that this wasn't . . .

Well, damn.

"You were right."

Silver pulled around the little device the robot had pointed to, and it did better match the schematics of the vocal emulator. The robot held its head up a little, and Silver could imagine Knuckles' smug little smile.

"Yeah, yeah. Finding it is one thing. Fixing it is something else."

It took a long time. Days. The wires were so fine, and the innards so delicate, Silver used his psychokinesis to maneuver around inside it, and even that was painstakingly slow.

But eventually it seemed back to functional order. He reinstalled it, triple checking that everything was connected properly before attaching the last wire. Once done, he stood back, brow furrowed in concern.

"Okay. Try to boot it up. Or whatever you call it."

The robot turned to face him, and its LED eyes flickered slightly as it accessed the repaired component. At first there was nothing, and Silver thought he may have either messed it up, or it had been damaged beyond repair. But then a loud, high-pitched whine split the air, and he slapped his hands over his ears.

The whine cut off, replaced with static. The robot beat its chest with a fist.

"zzzz . . . st-- . . . --pid thi-- . . ."

Another solid pound, and something clicked inside it.

". . . did it work?"

Silver's eyes went wide. His hands dropped to his sides and he stared at the robot.

It didn't just look like Knuckles. It didn't just act like Knuckles.

It sounded like Knuckles, too.

[duhragonball]

November Plannin'

All right, I've been thinking it over, and I think I'm gonna have to pull the plug on my NaNoWriMo account. The AI thing irks me, because to me the organization seems to think that it doesn't matter if you use Chat GPT or some other damn thing to reach the goal. And I do think it matters, because to me the whole point of the exercise is that those 50,000 words come from me, and me alone. The only software I need is Notepad.exe. I only downloaded iA Writer because it was like a Notepad.exe for my phone, and I got FocusWriter because it's like Notepad.exe with a wordcounter.

I've heard about the Nano community, and the writing groups, and the public meet-ups, and I'm not knocking any of that stuff, but I never had any interest in that. I just used the website to keep score, and I guess that's what bugs me, because by refusing to condemn AI, they're basically insinuating that the score doesn't matter. "It doesn't matter what you wrote." Someone told me that once and it still gets me kinda hot.

NaNoWriMo doesn't care if I write the words or not. All the org seems to care about is having participants who'll buy the merch and click on their sponsors, or whatever. They're gonna do this shady crap and they take the participants for granted. "What are you gonna do? Leave? You need us to reach your writing goals!"

That's the message I get from them. That's what made me reluctant to decide, because it is handy, and there's a certain anxiety that if I give up the structure the site offers, I might not reach my goal.

And that's the "creative monster" I need to slay this year. When I was in college, I took a semester of creative writing, and there was an assignment called "Killing the Creative Monster", and I interpreted it as a sense of not having enough time to write. Things kept happening, and the stuff I wanted to do seemed like it would take too long with no certainty that it would be worthwhile. That was in 1998. In 2024, the Creative Monster is the idea that I'm dependent on NanoWriMo to get me where I'm want to be.

So I'm gonna close down my account on the site. But I'm not doing it right away, because first I'm gonna save all the stats and stuff that belong to me. We'll start with the banner image I put up on my profile.

This is Zack Sabre Junior. This year, he won the G1 Climax tournament. He made a big deal about how his career wouldn't be complete until he won the G1. Not just any G1, but this year's tournament. I just put this picture in my profile because I was digging his tag team stuff with Taichi a few years ago, but suddenly I'm reminded of him winning the G1 this year. It was a big deal. He's the first guy to win that I actually wanted to win.

I've won NanoWriMo seven times from 2017 to 2023. But that doesn't matter. Unless I win Unaffiliated Autumnal Writing Challenge (UAWC) in 2024, I'll always feel a bit unsatisfied. That's what this one is about. No pep talks from some author I never heard of because I'm too busy watching anime to read. No funky word-count widget that always malfunctions around midnight. Just me and this computer, and a bunch of tekkers. That's how we're gonna do this one.

Good. I finally feel fired up about this one. I was beginning to get nervous. Let's figure out what I need to work on.

Luffa Annual 6. Ironically, this one actually takes priority over the main fic, becuase it's the Christmas Special, so it has a hard deadline. I was gonna work on it last week, but I kind of blew it off.

I don't know that the annuals are all that popular, but I enjoy making them, even if they are a huge pain in the butt to figure out. I'm glad this is the last one in the set, but I won't just slap it together and call it good.

Tellurium. This is a weird side-bet I'm making here. On my main blog, I used to do a series on the discovery of the chemical elements, and this was the next one on my list back in, uh... 2016. The tricky thing here is that the writing is just part of the job. There's research that goes into this stuff, and I don't want to get lose a days' worth of wordcount trying to wrap my head around molecular orbitals. Call me a glutton for punishment. It'd be relatively easy to just do 10-12 Luffa chapters and call it a month, because I've done that before. I feel like this year needs to be trickier. Also, I really, really want to get Te in the books. I don't think I like the chemical elements more than Luffa, but it is telling that I'm even having that conversation with myself right now.

Luffa 225-234. Of course I still plan to stick with what brung me to the dance. Kakarot is behind me but this fic isn't finished. The problem is that I only have a nebulous plan on where to go from here, and it's coming together a lot more gradually than I thought it would. I plotted a cool scene on my commute this afternoon, so that's a good sign, but I need to be realistic here. Last year went really well because I was writing the Luffa vs. Goku fight that I had been dreaming of for years. Motivation-wise, I've got nowhere to go but down. But I had similar problems in 2018-2020, and I prevailed then.

That Bulma project I was horsing around with. Last year, there was some crank on Twitter getting pissy at anyone who shipped Bulma with any non-canon partners, like there's a rule or something. That kind of inspired me to try to do some shorter works featuring Bulma hooking up with different characters. I didn't get very far last year, but I liked having a side-thing that I could jump into whenever I got stuck with the main work.

You know, thinking about it, I really need to use 2025 to work on some non-Luffa fanfic. In the early years, I worried that working on a longfic would eat up time that I could use for one-shots, and I slowly acclimated to just focusing one thing. But now that the Goku fight is done, the pressure is off to finish Luffa before I die. I mean, it's still not finished, but the Goku fight was a major milestone, and I didn't like the idea of never getting that done.

I mean, I still get kudos on that Caulikale fic I wrote in 2018, and the Gochi thing I did. People like that stuff, and I'm pretty good at making it. Maybe I should run a poll.

I dunno, that's probably enough for now. I should go back to bed. But I feel a lot better about November than I did a few days ago, that's for sure.

[religion-is-a-mental-illness]

New Rule: Bring Back Trad Dads | Real Time with Bill Maher

And finally, New Rule: this Father's Day, if you really want to give your father something he'll treasure forever, give him permission to be a dad like dads used to be.

And before you start in with, "But Bill, what do you know about it? You're not a parent." Yeah, I don't give blowjobs either, but I can tell when someone is doing it wrong. How about that? So, no, I don't have kids, but I sit next to yours at restaurants.

I see parents in stores kowtowing to brats like they're congressmen groveling before Trump. I've seen a seven-year-old ram a shopping cart into someone's coccyx and the parent just shrugs and gives a look like, kids… what are you gonna do? Raise them right. That's what you can do.

For as long as I've had a television show, the issue of parents overindulging their children has been a topic of discussion. So, it's not like it's new, but it hasn't gotten better either. We were talking about trophy syndrome in 1993, and then it was helicopter parenting, and then bulldozer parenting. And now we have gentle parenting, or as it used to be known, negotiating with terrorists.

British author Sarah Ockwell Smith, who coined the term, said, "The key here really is thinking, 'Would I like it if someone did this to me?' If the answer is 'no,' then why would you do it to your child?" Because they're a child? Would I like it if someone stripped me naked and plopped me down in a tub of water? No, but with a kid, that's just bath time.

I keep hearing how parenting is so hard these days. Yeah, because you're making it hard. Gentle parenting. It's like a Taco Bell breakfast. The reason it feels wrong is because it is. And it's ruining lives on both sides of the equation. Parents, it's ruining your lives because you've made yourselves a butler to a five-year-old.

And the kids, because the results are in. And all this letting the kids run the show, path of least resistance, child rearing, is harming them. The average high school kid today has the same level of anxiety as the average psychiatric patient in the early 1950s. A recent survey of employers found that about one in five recent college graduates brought their parents with them to a job interview. Our kids are crippled with anxiety because they haven't been properly prepared for a world that doesn't revolve around them.

Almost ten percent of college students claim to have PTSD. From college? The cradle of safetyism? The home of safe spaces and trigger warnings and policing offensive words? You're not supposed to get PTSD in college. You're supposed to get an STD.

The National Institutes of Health says that roughly half of teenagers now have a mental health disorder at some point in their lives. Which tells me one thing, the National Institutes of Health is also part of the problem.

The mental health disorder is on the part of the adults, not the children, the adults, who forgot that to a child, discipline is love, and that kids need structure and authority. Of course, they think they have traumatic stress disorder when they get to college, if before they left the house, they never heard the word "No." Never heard, "You're wrong." Never heard, "Wait, wait."

A lot of life is waiting, yeah. Waiting for your boss to recognize your worth. Waiting for love to bloom. Waiting for your career to take off. Waiting for your partner to be finished in the bathroom. Waiting for your porn to download, for your vape to charge. For the drugs to kick in. For your eyebrows to grow back after you do something stupid on drugs. It's vital you learn as a kid how much of life is going to be waiting.

And boundaries. Jesus, yes, boundaries. Sex dolls set more boundaries than today's parents. This is why the traditional dad, the trad dad, needs to make a comeback. Not all the way back to the 1950s psychopath who never said he loved you and hit you with a belt, no. But just back to the dad who believes that "Because I said so" is a perfectly legitimate answer to any question a child may have. Just back to the dad who would never say anything as stupid as, "My kid is my hero." Or, "Where do you want to eat dinner?" Or, "One more story and then we really have to start thinking about going to bed, okay?"

Trad dads don't negotiate. They say, "You will apologize to your mother, don't make me turn this car around, some things just happen because life is unfair, clean your room, be quiet, the adults are talking, and it's not all about you." Mostly, a trad dad knows he's your parent, not your friend. "Hey, buddy" isn't in his vocabulary. He isn't your emotional support animal. He's simply a guy who understands the job to raise an adult who can survive in the wild.

There's a long-running TV show in Japan called Old Enough, where parents send children as young as two on errands by themselves. Sometimes the kids cry, and sometimes they come home with the wrong stuff, but that's okay. That's how you learn. Meanwhile, in this country, parents strap leashes to their kids like they're escorting a serial killer on Con Air. And children are constantly tracked like they're the last surviving albino tiger instead of just another white kid named Liam.

But what happens, what always happens when uber-liberal bullshit goes too far, is it produces a far more damaging counter-reaction. In the absence of traditional fathers, teenage boys these days are turning to meathead misogynist influencers like Andrew Tate. Ever heard of him? Well, your kid has. He's popular with teenage boys because when we don't give them a masculine male role model they look up to, they go out and find one. And being teenage boys, of course, it's going to be the worst possible one.

Andrew Tate is a man who answers the question, "What if Axe Body Spray could talk?" He's so anti-woman, I don't think he even has a mother. I think he was born when lightning struck a jug of protein powder. And now he's your teenage son's favorite thinker. Did I mention he's a big Trump fan?

So, this Father's Day, let's give dear old dad the gift of being dear old dad. And also, shut up. He's trying to watch the game.