#I just get to the time I usually exercise and do it
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BATBOYS + SITTING ON THEIR BACK DURING PUSH-UPS.
note : personally i would love someone to push up w me on their back ,,, and also no damian just becquse i couldn't rhink of a scenario soz aloz
BRUCE WAYNE.
the kids had forced offered bruce a night off, after performing his nightly duties too many months in a row. now, sitting in bed with a book, you found it difficult to concentrate on the printed words as your partner lingered on the floor by his side of the bed, his quick breaths huffing through your shared bedroom. what on earth could he be doing? flipping the corner of your page down to save your place, you folded the book shut and put it down, rolling over the bed to peer over the side... only to find your wonderous bruce wayne... doing push ups?
"what are you doing?" you'd chuckled with a soft shake of your head.
muscles rippling beneath the flesh of his back, bruce brought his body down, and then pushed himself back up again, his triceps straining against skin. with a grunt he glanced back at you, never ceasing movement. "i need to get energy out before i go to bed. mind you, i'm not usually relaxing by this time."
another laugh brushed past your lips. "then that's not tiring you out." but bruce only sent you another glance, more sheepish this time; you couldn't blame him, not being accustomed to how one normally retires for the evening.
before he could reply again, you were slinging a leg over the side of the mattress and landing on the plush carpeting. bruce's exercise ceased in curiosity, his head turning to run his gaze over your legs. "oh, no, don't stop on my behalf," you grinned, carefully tucking one of your shins along his back and lowing the rest of your weight onto him.
but bruce wayne didn't falter a bit.
instead, he took it in his stride, tucking his arms and moving down, and then pushing up even faster than he'd been doing before. but he couldn't hide the crescent of his eyes and lines at the corners of his mouth as they turned up — he could do this all night.
DICK GRAYSON.
bullets of sweat shot to the floor with each punch, his flesh grunting against the boxing bag hanging from the ceiling. it never had the chance to swing too far, for he was already hitting it from the other side. although you weren't going as hard at it as your boyfriend, your own limbs were straining from exercise.
with a loud exhale, dick stepped away from the swinging sand bag, holding out a shaking hand to steady it. before it could stop, he was already moving to one of the ready-laid mats.
without a second too long of a break, he was down on his palms, moving up and down, his triceps tensing and bulging in his flesh. the way he kept glancing at you every few moments was making it very difficult to focus on your own workout.
ceasing your movements, you looked over at him with crossed arms. "anything i can help you with?" it was half a joke, expecting him to just grunt a chuckle and shake his head, getting caught red-handed checking you out. instead, he allowed a few seconds' silence, and then hummed.
"yes, actually." his voice was strained against his action, but he'd be damned if he stopped now just to speak. "come here, will you?"
it's not like you're busy or anything. but who were you to deny one dashingly handsome dick grayson your time and energy; especially when that's what you were dating him for.
unable to bite back a smile, you made your way over. "okay... what now?"
"sit on my back."
despite the tension in his throat as he spoke, dick didn't pause his push-ups — and you were supposed to sit on him like this? right...
however strange it may have been to try sit down on a moving man's back, the sheer fact dick could push-up your body weight made it worth it (no matter how many times you fell off before finally sticking it).
JASON TODD.
relaxing days — no work, no appointments, nothing to do — had to be the best days. especially here, as you and jason lay belly-down on the floor, using your glorious free time to complete a puzzle book you'd found at the grocery store the other day.
well... jason was belly-down on the floor; you were belly-down on his back, peering over his shoulder and pointing at the page, giving your contributions.
it got to the point where you were both on the last page, pen marks etched into the paper from where you'd scribbled answers and numbers and words, but you were stumped. with a huff, jason flicked the pen from his fingers, landing with a thump a metre away. "how are they gonna make puzzles you can't even solve? stupid..."
"hey, hey," you chuckled, bringing your fingers to scratch lovingly at his jaw. "i can get us a new one. want to go now?" as the words left your mouth, you moved one leg from where it lay entwined with his, preparing to get ready for an outing.
but jason was too quick, and too stubborn. before you could react, he'd pulled one arm from beneath him and lightly pressed down on your back, keeping you in place. "no, i'm joking," he mumbled. "please, let's just stay."
anything for him.
and so you fell limp against him once more, arms folding beneath your chin so you could rest your head, eyes fluttering closed. silence ran through the apartment, aside from the soft workings of jason's breathing beneath your ear; outside the city buzzed, but, by now, it was more background noise. perhaps a little nap wouldn't hurt—
something was moving beneath you, and your eyes shot open in alarm, arms shooting out from beneath you and clinging to the nearest thing – which happened to be around jason's waist. although you weren't moving, the coffee table beside you was bobbing up and down, and you couldn't possiblt fathom what was happning, until you realised...
"don't want to miss a workout," jason grunted from below, as if reading your mind. no lazy day was truly lazy when you had a jason peter todd to mind.
TIM DRAKE.
"i bet i could do that," tim spoke from the other end of the couch, where his socked feet were prodding your legs, probably in a surreptitious attempt to get them massaged. "no sweat."
you glanced between the tv and him, your lovely boyfriend tim, who would come up in the dictionary if you searched for the word overzealous. on the screen, playing the scene of a bizarre film you'd flipped to, the main love interest was working out when the main character stumbled into the room; there was some fleeting dialogue, and then, before you could find an explanation for it, she was sitting on his back as he continued his workout.
"what, you—" now when you looked over at tim, he had that wide grin on his face, and you knew you were in for something. "you want to try it now?"
without much of an answer, tim was rising to his feet, adjusting the waistband of the linen pyjama pants he wore, and fell to his hands and knees. "i mean, if you insist," he scoffed playfully. "try not to fall in love with me even more."
something about this didn't feel right... tim was certainly muscular, certainly strong — you'd seen him in action — but you didn't have much trust in him this time. regardless of your worries, you shimmied from your seat on the couch and carefully arranged yourself, legs crossed, on tim's back.
he only shook a bit at first, his legs now outstretched behind him, arms firm as logs. but he wasn't moving, just frozen in the plank position.
peering over his shoulder at him, you asked, "what's with the hold-up?"
pink in the cheeks, jaw clenched, tim's voice barely came out through his teeth. "yeah, just... wait—"
carefully – and very slowly – tim lowered himself, and in addition you, down, until his toned chest was millimetres away from the floor, and then, just as slowly, he pushed back against the ground.
once he was back in his starting position, he shifted beneath you, almost toppling you overboard. "okay, okay, i'm done!" he gasped. "my abs are gonna kill me!"
DUKE THOMAS.
being sick for the past week, you'd found it difficult to encourage yourself out of the house to go visit the gym — so, instead, you'd resorted to working out at home.
duke returned home the moment the sun began to dip below darkening clouds, his warmth radiating through the house as he closed the door behind him. he called something into the living room, but it went unheard beneath the instructions playing on the telly.
"oh, you working out?" he hummed as he entered, raking his eyes over your form and the synchronised movements on the tv screen.
mid-movement, you grunted a yeah, and duke edged around you to sit on the couch.
finally, when your break came, you collapsed to your mat and turned to him, grabbing your water bottle on the coffee table. "how was patrol?" you breathed.
the corners of duke's mouth turned up in a grin, clearly bemused by the sheen of sweat along your brow. "yeah, great." his eyes glanced over to the screen — two more minutes of your break, and it looked like you'd be attempting a five-minute plank. "mind if i work in with you?"
you glanced back, sipping at your water, and gave a half-chuckle. "i would've thought you'd be too tired for more exercise."
duke's bottom lip jutted out with a casual shrug. "i've missed you, we can do it together."
unfortunately, you couldn't ignore that little smile, that charm he held like a secret. and so you put your water bottle back on the table and duke joined you, beside your mat.
when the timer was up, you braced yourself for your plank, but duke, also on his knees, caught your attention — some stupid smile lingered on his lips, like he had a cheeky plan. "i don't know if a plank will be difficult enough for me."
"well done," you scoffed playfully. "just because it's easy for you, doesn't mean it's easy for me."
he held out a hand to diffuse any wrong ideas. "no, i just meant i think i know a way to break a sweat."
at this, you eyed him suspiciously, albeit curiously. before you could question him any further, he was on his palms and tip of his toes, gesturing you to sit on his back.
after a few "are you crazy?"s, you found yourself sitting on his back, trying not to touch him too much with your overly-warm limbs, lowering and raising with ease, your youtube workout by now forgotten.
#aangelinakii#dc#dc comics#dc imagines#dc reactions#dc headcanons#dc universe#batman#batfam#batboys#batfam imagines#bruce wayne#jason todd#dick grayson#duke thomas#tim drake#bruce wayne x reader#bruce wayne imagines#dick grayson imagines#dick grayson x reader#jason todd x reader#jason todd imagines#tim drake imagines#tim drake x reader#duke thomas x reader#duke thomas imagines
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the cardio machine i want is on the cardio machine
cw: gym rat toji x loser!gf - size kink, sweat kink (?), toji is a big old meanie. loser!gf series: geto gojo nanami.
loser!reader who, like a million other sedentary people on new year’s eve, said “new year new me” and proceeded to enroll at the local gym.
gym rat!toji who knew how things are in the beginning of the year, so the first week he arrives one hour earlier than usual to avoid all the lazy fucks that won’t last two months.
of course he makes a few mental bets on the ones that would quit and how long it would take, you included.
it’s easy to spot the “i don’t want lift weights cause i don’t want look jacked” type of girl.
at the breaks between one set and the other he looked around, not surprised to see you slowing down the treadmill after running not even two whole minutes.
sometimes he caught you staring at him through the mirror, not an uncommon occurrence amonst the women there, though you surprised him one day by tapping his shoulder after he finishing his weighted squats.
“can you… give me a few tips?” he looked so intimidated, from up close his shoulders looked like a wall, he stared at you from above, dark green eyes seemed to be heavily judging you, “never mind this was a bad idea, sorry” you turned around, grabbing you bottle and running off the gym.
by the time you managed to gather the courage to show your face back there two whole weeks had passed.
“consistency is the key you know” you were distracted looking down your phone while slowly walking the treadmill when the handsome man appeared beside you, the sudden presence destabilized you.
before you could become the viral video of the week when inevitably a gym employee decides to post the security footage of your ass rolling off the active treadmill, toji wrapped one big arm around your waist and pulled you to the stable floor.
“you caught me off guard the other day” he said completely unfazed by saving you from a life of embarrassment, “then you disappeared.”
“yeah i didn’t know if i wanted to come back anyways, i haven’t see any results so far” you pulled the hem of your shirt down.
toji snorted, “‘course you ain’t seeing results, sweetheart, you don’t lift.”
“well, it’s hard…” toji rolled his eyes, there was always an excuse.
though he also did a new year’s resolution of being more patient, for his kids primarily but teaching a cute thing like you could be a good exercise too.
soon enough, toji was correcting your form, texting you asking why you haven’t showed up to the gym and ringing your bell incessantly when you complained about muscle pain and said you wouldn't go that day.
“it’ll feel better once you start to move” he explained, resting on your door frame when you opened the door on your pajamas.
“let me alone, just today” you whined.
“you asked for my help now go put on something without cartoons on it” he waited for you to turn around and slapped your butt. it had been only one week he was coaching you but there was already a weird intimacy due to the fact he was pretty much always looking at your body and touching you.
to correct your form. obviously.
"what do i have to do today, coach fushiguro?" you asked from your bedroom through an ajar door which allowed toji to get a peek at your pink underwear and cute ass.
"cardio, bicycle first. get some blood flowing on those sore muscles" he tilted his head and raised his eyebrows watching you bend over to grab a biker shorts at the lowest drawer then holding back a laughter at the grunt of pain coming from you.
"once it gets better i can teach you other types of cardio" he walked around your kitchen examining your cabinets and stuff you kept in your fridge. needless to say it was all junk.
"can't wait" you replied sarcastically, failing to understand the meaning.
it took a few more days till you got used to toji's training, then he decided to focus on your upper body.
"such a simple movement, how do you manage to get that wrong?" he raised from the bench he was sitting behind you watching your form through the mirror. you almost dropped the weights at your feet when he came close. it was almost scary how much bigger than you he was especially seeing it throght the mirror. his right hand wrapped around yours on the dumbell and his bicep touched your arm as he pushed your arm closer to your body, "tuck your elbows in, straight your back" his free hand pushed your shoulders till they were touching his chest.
how come he smelled so good, so... musky and...
"are you even making any force?" he lowered his head, his reflection looking annoyed. so you decided to ignore the sudden heat between your thighs and flex your arm the way he taught you.
and just like he promised, when you were consistent enough and handling a good 5 minute run he decided to show you a more pleasing cardio.
"toji please~" you whined, thighs burning from riding him, you were using his rock hard abdomen as a support, but still.
"one more minute, come on" he looked at the watch on his wrist and slapped your ass, "haven't i prep-ed you good enough?" his thumb rubbed your bottom lip then pushed in meeting your tongue, where you tasted yourself in his digits one hour after he ringed your bell and said he was going to reward your good discipline, but he had to strech you first.
"good girl" you felt his abdomn flex when he raised from his laying position on your bed, "now leave it to daddy" he pecked your lips and quickly changed positions, putting a pillow under your ass and rolling his neck to start his cardio of the day.
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Man, for someone who keeps invoking media literacy, you sure seem to be struggling with accurately addressing the points that I've been making.
1) He is good at lying to people about who he is, all while being able to make himself likable 2) He is secretly unhappy and has been thinking about the day with the Lion Cub a lot
Here's part of where I think we fundamentally disagree: I don't think he's much of a liar tbh. He doesn't care enough to lie. If anything, he seems almost incapable of it at times. He has coping mechanisms — namely: telling himself (and others) that even though life is pointless, that's actually awesome because you can do whatever you want and not have to worry about anything — and one could, I suppose, argue that he's lying to himself in that sense? But he does clearly WANT to believe it, and acts accordingly. True, Elphaba sees discontent within him and assumes he must be hiding some inner depth (because how can he possibly be unhappy if he's empty inside?? selfish and shallow people don't feel bad about stuff or help others!), but I think his later actions actually show how shallowness can sometimes have its own kind of depth, and selfishness can have its own kind of beneficence. I'm aware this isn't intuitive or prima facie stuff — that's why I posted an analysis about it.
I think it’s a much more plausible headcanon that he has always been working as a double agent than your headcanon that he’s decided instead to randomly embrace being a fascist.
Honey, here's the thing: contrary to what you suggest, mine is not a headcanon in this case. At all. He became a fascist soldier. All ulterior motives (speculative or not) aside: that is simply what he did. It's text. I never said he "embraced" it in the sense that he liked it. It's directly stated that he doesn't like his situation. But that didn't stop him from quite literally choosing to be in that situation. Sucking up whatever other feelings he has and doing it anyway.
Maybe it’s hard to “reconcile the compassionate boy we saw in the woods with a fascist commander” because he isn’t one?
Except he literally is. That is what he became. Your insistence that he worked his way through the ranks of a fascist military without ever doing any of the actions that make someone fascist is beyond belief. Like obviously I understand that your contention here is that he didn't "become" a fascist on an ideological level. He just went through the motions without internalizing or identifying with the fascists' ideas. But I'm afraid plenty of German (or hell, Confederate) soldiers were "just fighting for their loved ones" and "didn't actually believe in all that stuff": but they fought anyway. And they fought on the wrong side, and did the things that came to define what we think of when we talk about their regimes. You are doing exercises in idealization. Becoming a fascist is as much (or more) about physically carrying out the acts of fascism as it is about adhering to what it proposes. Rejecting the latter does not erase the former.
Maybe if you “read by sheer text; on the actions and statements on the page” you’d realise that his actions in act one don’t make sense in act two if you read him as part of the regime?
He. Is. Part. Of. The. Regime. You don't get to say he was somehow set apart on some abstract level from the force that he commanded. Good Lord.
My point about the challenge of reconciling Fiyero between Act I and Act II was not "wow, this doesn't make sense, he must have changed so drastically!!!" I literally explained my point. He hardly changed at all — and that's interesting. The ways in which he did change are equally interesting — because they aren't positive, contrary to what one may usually expect from a character arc of a male lead in a fantasy story. In most such stories the male lead confronts his flaws and he either overcomes them or makes peace with them. Fiyero does neither — which is completely in character and honestly a perfect and natural evolution from where he began — and from a writing perspective I absolutely love it, lol
Oh sorry, Fiyero should have just gone down to the resistance job shop and got a top post there!
I know this is tongue-in-cheek, but the fact your unironic insinuation underneath it appears to be that... *checks notes* rebellions do not have job openings for charismatic men of action...??? Where were you going with this??? lol
The resistance that, as far as we know, basically doesn’t exist, as it doesn’t seem like Elphaba has got much help either (we know there’s rebel Animals that shelter her, but she’s also at the point where she tries to beg her father for help and seriously considers just giving up and joining the Wizard).
Hon... has it occurred to you that by the time we get to Act II... the rebels are fringe and weak because they've been repressed for years by the forces Fiyero volunteered in? Like, we are TOLD that there are rebels. That's a fact. We know that one of the primary activities of the Gale Force is violent repression against Animals. Come on. You're good at extrapolation. Put two and two together here.
But in all seriousness: no movement? Start one then. If it's really that deep. Sounds like a skill issue to me.
Someone has to do this job, if it’s not Fiyero it’s someone a lot worse. We know Fiyero has compassion for Animals, we know Fiyero wants to protect Elphaba (we literally see him doing so three times in act 2). If Fiyero places himself in command, however grim it might be, he now has some degree of control over Oz’s army and how much damage they can do to the Animals and Elphaba.
The damage has been done though. On his watch. To some extent on his ORDERS even. The Animals are all but erased from Oz. Elphaba is so deep in hiding that Fiyero, with all the resources at his command, hunting her desperately, still turns up nothing every time. "Someone has to do this job", when the job is fascism, is not a defense. In fact, "I was just doing my job" is a very well-known and infamously horrible non-defense particular to this exact context. It'd be a better overall argument if him being captain instead of someone else had actually made some objective difference to the end results, but we don't see that. Like I guess you could really stretch things and credit Fiyero for there still being a small holdout of rebel Animals around at all?? Like maybe if he hadn't been there, they'd have been dealt with a bit more aggressively or something? But that seems like a pretty meager end to try and justify his means.
It wasn’t planned that he’d meet her in the throne room, no, but it certainly was planned, by putting himself as the head of the search for the Witch, that if she was found in a dangerous situation he could get her out of it. He manages to get all his guards away and for her to escape safely, he couldn’t have done this if he’d been in any other position.
And he couldn't have achieved anything comparable in ANY other way besides doing fascism? Really?
Imagine, if you will, an alternate scenario: Fiyero doesn't join the Gale Force, and instead joins with the rebellion. Elphaba finds him. They're working together to save Animals again, like old times. They do stuff together and they have each other's backs if either one is caught in a tough spot. Fiyero never gets engaged to Glinda. Is that not a MUCH less convoluted, far more sensible plan? The fact that all explanations for why Fiyero chose anything OTHER than that seem to boil down to weird borderline fascist apologia, is how I know my points are valid.
you told me him being in the Gale Force achieved nothing, it saved Elphaba’s life and allowed the ending to happen.
The logic here is just... Okay. Hon. If he. Had chosen. Something else. The sequence. Of events. Would be. Radically different. And Elphaba. Would not. Have been. In the. Situation that. You give. Him credit. For saving. Her from. At all.
If you joined the Mafia "to protect your family", and then your cousin follows you into a meeting one day and almost gets shot, but you stepped in and stopped it, that doesn't somehow mean things went according to your plan; you only "protected" them from a scenario they would never otherwise have been in had it not been for you, lol
Even her sad verse in Thank Goodness imply she joined because she wanted it (and only later found out it wasn’t quite how she planned).
And y'know a very particular way it wasn't like how she'd planned? She didn't plan on getting it as part of her abuse. Being showered with nice things is a well-known abuse tactic, because it's enticing and allows the abuser to insinuate that their victim was consenting and enthusiastic about what happened to them. There's more to it, absolutely — Glinda is perhaps the most complicated character in the show — but the fact you insist on victim-blaming over and over is... wow.
No one was going to imprison her,
The guards physically detained her and Elphaba had to break the laws of fucking physics to get them to let go, wtf are you talking about, lmfao
there’s literally no reason at all to enslave her,
Except that she's the closest person in the world to their new Public Enemy #1, and can be leveraged in about a million different ways in their favor. Glinda has intel. Elphaba might have been tempted to try and come back and get her. She's a perfect bargaining chip in case Elphaba got too aggressive too: the Witch might back off if Glinda's life were threatened. And, as the Wizard quickly discovers: Glinda is really likable and sociable and boosts morale wherever she goes. So they made her theirs, and dulled her pain by trying to appease and cater to her in every superficial way available. This is Abuse 101, hon.
But ok, let’s take your “enslavement” fantasy scenario. Fiyero is literally the next candidate for Morrible to “enslave”, she knows he and Elphaba were at least tentative friends, she might even have realised he was also absent after the day with the Lion Cub, he’s dating Glinda and his royal connections and fame and likeability make him a useful asset. If Morrible really is blackmailing people to join her on trumped up charges, it would be very easy for her to either use the Lion Cub situation to blackmail into it, or threaten to hurt Glinda if he does not.
"Fantasy"... jfc dude, lol
Fiyero wasn't literally in the palace in the clutches of the guards as a perceived accomplice to the Witch at the end of Act I. The situations are apples and oranges.
Tbh as far as we know, Fiyero didn't really know a ton about Elphaba to begin with; certainly no specific useful intel. There's no reason to think Morrible ever put two and two together vis-à-vis the cub — a slacker student like Fiyero being absent from class isn't weird. And even if for some reason she did get suspicious enough to press the matter, there's so little she'd have to go off of that he could literally just say he ducked out when the whole class started spasming, and that's pretty much that. And yeah sure he's "dating" Glinda, and may under the right circumstances be manipulable if she got threatened: but let's not forget this is also the dude who abandoned her the very first chance he got, and then pointed a gun at her as a bluff without a second thought. He doesn't care enough about Glinda for that to be really leverageable, and it's not like Morrible wouldn't know that: his unenthusiastic response at their engagement announcement would tell her, if nothing else had by that point.
But then... Fiyero didn't ever need to be coerced to become what he became. He volunteered. Glinda was caught in the attic and knew a certain regime-delegitimizing, worldview-shattering secret — I fail to see how there is any scenario you can seriously propose in which the Wizard letting her go with that knowledge, with her closeness to Elphaba, etc., could even be halfway tenable from the Wizard's perspective. It actually defies belief that you can misread her situation as badly as you are.
This is headcanon.
Nah. He literally sang two separates songs about it. Dancing Through Life's whole thing is "nihilism rocks because you can just do stuff and never worry about it", and his part in So Long As You're Mine has him going "I don't care about anything except acting on our desires in this fleeting moment". I don't need to headcanon anything to simply point out that those sentiments are neither deep nor considerate (and, as I have said: don't have to be), lol
This is canon: he pointed a gun at the Wizard to help Elphaba escape. He had to escape too.
He spent years specifically trying to find her, with the heavily implied desire to run away with her. And what did he do the second he saw her? Ran away with her. Say she hadn't been in danger: say she was either undiscovered, or was reconciled with the Wizard. Do you think — based on your own version of him, double agent headcanon and all — that he would have been content NOT to leave there with her then? That after years of searching, he would just let her fly out of there and leave him behind again? Did we watch the same show?? At this point your take on him is even more reactive and thoughtless than mine, if you think his character would allow him to not only deny his passion for her but also to stay in a situation he regards as meaningless and insufferable. As I said to begin with: he can be protective of her AND do so shallowly and selfishly. Reread my original post if you need a refresher on what makes his attachment to her shallow and selfish; and friendly reminder that my saying these things is not a diss, I'm a fan of Genuinely Self-Absorbed, Deeply Shallow Fiyero.
“He doesn't think about the potential consequences of abandoning Glinda; for never cared about either his own safety or hers,” I’m sorry, are you really blaming Glinda telling Morrible and the Wizard to spread a rumour about hurting Nessa on Fiyero? Talk about fucking victim blaming.
Genuinely baffled as to your thought process here — I never said one word about what you're referring to, I was literally just pointing out that Fiyero didn't remotely consider that his fiancée could potentially catch some flak for his unexpected treason, or that leaving her totally alone with her abusers could worsen her situation (as we actually do see by the time of March of the Witch Hunters, where Morrible is far more directly and openly cruel to her than she was when Fiyero was there). This should be familiar to anyone who's seen abusers behave differently when other people are around, but flip a switch as soon as they have their victim all to themselves.
Not the Elphaba faking her own death plan! That must have taken days as the scarecrow. And careful manoeuvring of everything involved!
Cute, but you do realize you're agreeing with my point, right? Unless you're NOT being sarcastic, in which case... Okay. Fiyero did not plan the Melting. We aren't told how far in advance Elphaba planned the Melting, or what degree of input Fiyero had in it (hard to coordinate beforehand considering she was in a whole different part of Oz than he was, he was with Dorothy at the time, and, y'know... she only just learned that the Scarecrow was him MOMENTS before the Melting) but the pieces were all there and so simple that he could intuitively figure out basically what she was trying to pull off. Secret passage. Fire. Water. Rumor. Literally all he had to do was play along with the stage she'd set. It doesn't exactly take a Doctor of Thinkology.
Well I have happy news for you! He no longer has a hollow existence! That’s literally what act two is trying to tell us! Elphaba: Fiyero, you frightened me. I thought, I though you might have changed. Fiyero: I have... changed. * You’ve got me seeing through different eyes Somehow I’ve fallen under your spell and somehow I’m feeling it’s up that I fell
I hate to burst you bubble... but he hasn't changed for the better. I already said that. He still has a hollow existence — he tells us just how hollow it is in Thank Goodness — he just looks to Elphie as his one and only solace. I've elaborated on some of the layers behind it, but basically I argue that he chose Elphaba as his object of desire precisely because that is what she represents to him, in its purest form. Desire. She's "the one that got away"; the one he can't find; can't reach. The only thing in his meaningless life that's unavailable — and therefore tantalizing. She's the only one who doesn't swoon over him or get caught up in his carefree dissociative escapism. She's the one with a sexual tension so palpable but so frustratingly unresolved (until As Long As You're Mine ofc). She's the only challenge in his life that isn't an ineffable internal conflict between his id and superego: and in fact soothes that conflict because she stimulates them both.
[Wicked Act II spoilers]
[edited for tone and clarity of purpose, apologies for initial crudeness and frustration]
Okay, obviously I'm biased, but I'm gonna need the Fiyeraba shippers to please set a lot of your people straight about some things. I've seen way too many people trying to say that Glinda is just a selfish bimbo and that Fiyero is a virtuous and selfless figure more worthy of Elphaba's love. I'll set aside for now the idea of "worthiness" in this context. But let's start off with Fiyero joining the Wizard. Hoo boy...
Yes, he was initially somewhat less tolerant of the propaganda against Elphaba than Glinda was; yes, he was secretly trying to find her so he could run away with her or whatever. But honey: those facts DO NOT fully absolve his actions as the Wizard's top officer, or selfish recklessness throughout Act II. I see so many popular threads and posts romanticizing and whitewashing with "oh but he didn't REALLY join the Wizard, he just pretended so he could try to get to Elphie! It's all for love, and he sacrificed everything for her!" As if the literal captain of the literally fascist forces responsible for the oppression of Animals wasn't equally responsible for said oppression?? Hello? Fiyero really didn't think of seeking out Elphaba in ANY other way that DIDN'T involve becoming *checks notes*... the trusted leader of the troops committing all the abuses she's fighting against in the first place???? Like it's cool and all that he helped with Brrr, and it's all well and good that he planned on betraying the Wizard as soon as he found Elphaba (which took literal years, so I guess we're left to assume he was prepared to just keep doing fascism indefinitely if she didn't show up????), but uh... it's kind of concerning to how eager some of you are to make excuses for this dude volunteering as the head of the Ozian Gestapo??? smdh
He didn't accomplish anything from it either, by the way — like yeah, we get it, he did everything he did whilst silently fantasizing about running away with the Witch he was being paid to hunt. Fine. But I can't be the only one who doesn't buy that as an actual excuse???? Like, guys: nobody forced him to join the fascist army — even with crazy ulterior motives. He wasn't coerced into it; it wasn't his only choice or anything. Searching for Elphaba did not somehow compel him to go and volunteer to follow (or to give!) orders in the name of the dictator who was trying to have her assassinated the entire time. He could have just not done all that. (Genuinely so curious how the second film plans on covering that material tbh)
Glinda made several questionable decisions that can be (and have been) debated, but she is still very unambiguously a victim. Her position in the Wizard's regime was foisted upon her. There are things we can discuss, but I find that many folks need reminding that Glinda would undoubtedly have been disposed of (or worse) if she failed to make herself useful. I mean hell: she wasn't even supposed to meet the Wizard in the first place — she was only there because of Elphie. If she'd tried to resist, it would have immediately gotten her labeled the Witch's accomplice. As soon as she'd chosen not to get on the broom, her fate was out of her hands, and all available options were varying degrees of horrible.
That's not the case with Fiyero. He went to the Wizard all on his own; no one ever cornered or forced him into it. Thinking Animals are people, and having a crush on Elphaba, simply did not stop him from carrying out the regime's orders — for years. It's not clear exactly how long he's been captain at the start of Act II, but the clear implication is that he's been a soldier for most of the time skip. I've seen Fiyeraba accounts with headcanons about him acting as a double agent, secretly doing stuff to help Animals — and that's a great idea, it would indeed serve to make a lot of his actions way more palatable — but until we actually get to SEE some of that (maybe they'll add it for the movie version of Act II; we'll have to see), there is nothing in the story to suggest that. He certainly didn't do a damn thing for all those Animals who were enslaved and caged in the Wizard's palace — and we don't see a single other Animal outside of there in Act II, so as far as we know Fiyero has participated over those years in the near-total removal of Animals from Ozian society. In the name of "finding Elphaba". Not fighting for her cause. Just finding HER. For HIMSELF.
It's fine to have a ship you like, obviously — and there is genuinely a lot to like about Fiyeraba, I don't dislike the idea of them as a couple or as friends — but come on guys: please stop those out there idealizing Fiyero as somehow a clear "morally-superior" alternative to Glinda, lol. The dude had power, access, and opportunities, for years, that he could have wielded in any number of really selfless, revolutionary ways. He didn't. And I propose (apparently controversially): he simply didn't want to. And that — at the end of the day — is (much as some would like to deny it) true to his character. He always WANTED to be self-absorbed and shallow, and all his actions are consistent with that. Elphaba saw depth and discontentment in him, yes: but (and I cannot stress this enough) when given the chance, he channeled that in the wrong direction. He didn't confront that and become a better person — for the most part he just displaced and projected it onto Elphaba as an object of obsession, and put on an even thicker pretense than before.
All his actions — regardless of the complexity he has deep down — are those of a man who never gives one fuck about anything or anyone, except (kinda sorta) Elphaba. But even then: at no time does the care he has for her seem to extend to caring about any of her wants or needs outside of sexual validation from him, or how she might feel about his actions, or indeed the impacts of those actions upon her, her cause, or anyone or anything else. I don't think it should be all that controversial to say: he doesn't think through the wider repercussions of anything he does — thoughtlessness is just one of his core character traits. He doesn't think ahead or see meaning in anything outside of what can temporarily excite him, in the moment. I think people place a little too much weight on Elphaba clocking him with regard to his internal pain, and seem to expect (understandably of course) that she is not only right, but moreover that he will grow from that in a positive direction, based on her influence.
But he doesn't. If anything, we get a surprising inverse: he pretty much proves her wrong. Not to say he didn't have hidden depth and all that, like she said: but his hypothetical heart of gold proves not to really amount to much in practice. He doesn't grow out of his shallowness and his self-centeredness: he grows into it in a way that he hadn't quite yet in school. Where once he was only masking an internal listlessness, after he's been cracked open by Elphaba he decides to be genuinely self-absorbed and deeply shallow, not just coasting by. He performs in new ways — as a soldier, eventually as a "fiancé", etc. — but by Act II we meet a Fiyero who has staked the last remaining shred of humanity in him on the vain pursuit of the only object of his desire that has ever been unavailable to him, and firmly chosen to say to hell with everyone and everything else.
When put to the test, Fiyero sacrifices Glinda, the Animals, and all else that Elphaba actually cared about, to pursue his own unresolved crush from college. Mostly to get in her pants, really — as harsh as I'm sure that sounds. But let me be frank: that is literally all he ever accomplishes in the show. He gives her dick one time, and one of his castles, and that's it. That's the culmination of his years trying to find her — years in which he actively worked as one of the stormtroopers (or even the one commanding them) committing untold crimes against Animalkind (who, again, it seems have been all but erased from Oz by Act II): y'know, the very crimes Elphaba sacrificed her life to try and stop????? He spent the most important time of his life — of his own free will — being a fascist soldier, but he "did it for her" somehow, so according to some, it's perfectly fine. Heroic, even. Yikes??
But let's make something very clear (since my original version of this post caught a lot of flak, including slurs and other rudeness):
I like Fiyero. I find his role extremely interesting (I could do a whole dissertation on him, but I'm especially a fan of the way his proving Elphaba's assessment of him wrong presents a fascinating parallel and contrast with Glinda, which I think is lost on a lot of people). But PLEASE stop with all the misguided Glinda slander and idealization of Fiyero. By all means, thirst! But don't give me all this bullshit about him deserving Elphaba more, or being super deep, or being really principled or noble or whatever else. He does have layers, and quite intriguing ones, but his insides are straw — he isn't meant to have some deep, overwrought emotional core or motivations; he has passions that he acts upon when given the chance. That's it. And that's fine. Actually kind of refreshing in a story rooted in simple children's fantasy but rife with intensely complicated personalities. Fiyero makes it his mission to represent denial of depth and embrace of raw, spontaneous desire — and I for one love that, and wish others appreciated it.
And in all seriousness, shipping wars aside: by the end of the story, it's Glinda who is ultimately vindicated, and has — for all her faults — made the necessary choices to fulfill Elphaba's wishes, bring down the regime, etc. And all that despite herself. She's miserable: not just because of the mistakes she made, but because of her correct moves as well. Fiyero is simply not — and could never be — that person. And that's okay! Like I said: I am not anti-Fiyero. Fiyero's willingness to throw it all away for the sake of sheer, overriding passion is a huge part of what people like about him, of course — and it's an obvious factor in the attraction between him and Elphaba, because she has her own flavor of that impulse as well — but I'd actually argue that it's not romantic, it's his fatal flaw. And thematically that's fantastic! But I just don't believe that it somehow means he "deserves Elphaba more" because he "gave up his life for her" or whatever. In part because NOBODY truly "deserves" Elphie tbh, not 100% (and I question anybody who claims otherwise), but ultimately because I don't accept the idea that his fleeting acts of passion make up for all the shit leading up to them (or even proceeding after them tbh). At least Glinda managed to do what Elphaba always wanted in the end — but I would die on this hill even if Gelphie didn't exist.
You don't have to agree with my analysis of Fiyero and his choices, relationships, etc. — that's fine. What isn't fine is trying to portray Glinda as some kind of spineless traitor whore for the Wizard and Fiyero as a conscientious hero who earned Elphie through self-sacrifice. That's just not the story that was written. It's WAY messier and more interesting than that.
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SSR Jack Howl - New Year's Attire Vignette
"That's how it should be."
[Mister S's Mystery Shop]
―Day 1 on the job
Jack: There's a ton of people here just for the New Year's sale. I gotta put my all into this.
Jack: Based on the shift schedule… Right now, Malleus-senpai and Jamil-senpai on the other team are doing TAKOAGE battles.
Jack: Floyd-senpai's on the floor and register. I got stocking duty.
Jack: Everything keeps flyin' off the shelves faster than I can get 'em up, so I feel like I'm not getting any breaks, but…
Jack: If there's one thing I'm good at, it's breaking a sweat. I'll set up everything up all at once as my warming-up exercise!!
Jack: I guess I'll start with fixin' up the stationary corner. I'll just pick up this box filled with that stuff, and…
Jack: Notepads, quills, ink jars… All re-stocked. Nice! That should be good enough for the stationary corner.
Jack: Guess I'll do the clothing section next. I'll go grab the stock from the backyard…
Floyd: Ah, found ya, Sea Urchin-chaaan. I was lookin' for ya~
Jack: Floyd…-senpai. You need something?
Floyd: I'm handin' this customer off to ya.
Heartslabyul Student: I wanted to try buying some protein shakes to drink after muscle training, but I don't really get the difference between whey and soy.
Floyd: 'S what he's sayin', and I don't know nothing about muscle training, since I'm not into it, soooo. Plus, I'm getting tired of lookin' after customers~
Floyd: You're all about that training stuff, right, Sea Urchin-chan? Sooo I'll leave ya to it.
Jack: I REFUSE.
Floyd/Heartslabyul Student: Huh? / Eh?
Jack: Don't "Huh?" me. I've been tasked with restocking. Dealing with customers is your gig right now.
Jack: I don't care if you don't know anything about it, or are bored, or whatever. You do whatever was assigned to you. That's how it should be.
Floyd: Ehhh, but I don't wanna help customers anymore.
Floyd: If Sea Urchin-chan's not gonna help, then just run along and pick out whatever, I guess~
[Floyd leaves]
Heartslabyul Student: Eh? Pick out whatever…? C'mon, I came all the way to the store, here…
Jack: Whew, closing time, finally… I was using every muscle in my body, so my whole body just feels stiff.
Sam: Good job, my little doggy imp. How did the work suit you?
Jack: It was just the first day, but I definitely feel like I succeeded in doing everything I was assigned.
Sam: Nyeheehee, a reliable kid.
Sam: Only… If I were to compare you to the horned imp's team, I'd say your vibes are a little off.
Jack: Huh, vibes? A little off? What does that…
Sam: Well then, I'm counting on you tomorrow, too.
Jack: Wait, Sam-san!
Jack: My vibes are off…? I don't get it, was he saying that my work wasn't as good as the other team's work?
Jack: What did I do wrong? I definitely did everything I was supposed to do…
Jack: …Nope, I can't think of anything.
Jack: It's no use to just drown in my thoughts like this. I'll go for a run and try to clear my head.
[Sports Field]
Jack: Whew. As usual, I really like running in the crisp winter air, it helps clear my head.
Jack: …But I still don't get what was wrong with what I did…
Track & Field Club Member A: Hooray! My time got better since last time!
Track & Field Club Member B: See? Just like I said would happen, right? I told you this form's better to run in!
Track & Field Club Member A: Yeah… Now I'm really looking forward to the next meet. Let's get back to it after taking a quick break!
Jack: Hm…? Those guys are in the Track & Field club. And I'm pretty sure the next event's a marathon.
Jack: Hmph. Training together, huh. Listen to 'em acting all friendly with each other.
Jack: Well, it's true that practicing's the only way to get any better. So I need to make sure I work even harder tomorrow compared to today.
[Mister S's Mystery Shop]
―Day 2 on the job
Jack: I re-stocked, helped customers, and did my fair share of battles… I definitely worked twice as hard today as I did yesterday! My muscles got a crazy good workout!
Sam: Hey, doggy imp! It's break time, so make sure you rest up.
Jack: Sam-san! Thank you.
Jack: I know I did real good today. Uhh… And I think I had enough of that… what was it again…? Vibes!
Sam: Nyeheehee… You really think so? It didn't really look all that different from yesterday, to me.
Jack: HUH…!?
Jack: But I worked so hard… And there wasn't any difference from yesterday? Why's that?
Jack: Ugh, at this rate, I can say bye to that special bonus… What does that other team got that I don’t?
[Mister S's Mystery Shop]
Jack: Ugh, at this rate, I can say bye to that special bonus… What does that other team got that I don’t?
[Beside Mister S's Mystery Shop]
Jack: …......
Jamil: Oh, Jack. Are you on break? Good work out there.
Jack: Jamil-senpai, Malleus-senpai… You as well.
Malleus: What is wrong? You seem to be rather fatigued.
Malleus: I think we may sweep the special bonus if you continue in your present condition.
Jack: …Dammit, I can't even argue back, after what Sam-san said to me.
Jack: You guys look like you're doing fine enough.
Jamil: Well, yeah.
Jamil: But everything is all thanks to Malleus-senpai! I'm very thankful.
Malleus: Heh. A modest comment, Viper.
Malleus: After all, I am simply standing in front of the customers when you instruct me.
Malleus: ...Because that seems to make your life easier, does it not?
Jamil: E-Easier…? Hahaha.
Jamil: I just said that because whenever we do that, even the rowdiest customer seems to quiet down. I just presumed that we needed the right man for the right job…
Malleus: No need to explain. It is a fact that I am not accustomed to customer service. I will gladly follow your tutelage.
Malleus: You would do well to continue to make use of my presence.
Jack: Somehow I'm even starting to feel the pressure now… Ah, I need to head back work.
Malleus: Understood. Another time, Howl.
Jack: …Man… I feel like I don't see Floyd-senpai at all while we're on the floor,
Jack: But somehow those two are getting all chummy. …Oh! Wait…
Jack: Is this what Sam-san meant by "vibes"…?
Jack: Am I supposed to work together with Floyd-senpai like they do?
Jack: …No way, that'd be impossible! He's a moody guy, who knows how he'll act at any given moment.
Jack: Besides, I don't care who it is, I ain't gettin' all chummy with anyone!
Jack: Winning only matters if you can get it yourself. What's even the use of getting someone else's help to secure a victory?
Jack: But…
[FLASHBACK]
Sam: It didn't really look all that different from yesterday, to me.
Jack: …He did say that I hadn't improved at all from the day before, even though I know I worked even harder.
Jack: At this rate, I'll just be stuck walking in place. And above all…
Jack: I DEFINITELY DON'T WANT TO LOSE TO THE OTHER TEAM WITHOUT TRYING EVERYTHING!
Jack: I have to be able to do something by myself…!
[Mister S's Mystery Shop]
Jack: Next customer.
[beep]
Jack: That'll be 800 Madol [8 Thaumarks]. Thanks.
Jack: Whew, finally the line for checkout's winding down. I should replace the receipt paper while I can…
Floyd: Ehhh, you want a new pair of running shoes to kick off the new year~?
Floyd: I know tons about designer and brand-name shoes, but I don't know nothin' about running shoes.
Floyd: Soooo, you should just give up on those and find some other shoes to buy.
Jack: …Looks like Floyd-senpai is working in the shoes section. I see he's not taking it seriously, like usual.
Jack: Urgh… I guess I should go and…
Floyd: What, you want some kind of recommendation since you came all this way to buy some running shoes?
Floyd: I mean, sure, we got a guy who'd know that kinda stuff working here, but he's working the register right now, so I doubt he'll help you or nothin'.
Floyd: That dude's suuuuper hard-headed and stubborn and totally inflexible, so.
Jack: …Hey, that's not me you're talking about, is it?
Floyd: Oh hey, speak of the devil. What brings the cashier to our neck of the woods?
Jack: I heard you talking about running shoes… So I thought I'd suggest something.
Floyd: Eh, seriously? You?
Jack: …Yeah.
Floyd: Nice, lucky me. If you're gonna attend to the customer, I'm gonna go on break, then.
Jack: Huh? A break? What're you talking about, get some other work done in the meantime.
Floyd: I don't have nothin' else to do, I'm already done with cleaning and re-stocking. And manning the register was your job, so.
Floyd: Orrr… What, you want my help, or somethin'? Suuuure, I'll totally do it for ya~ If. You. Beg. Me. To. ♡
Jack: NO WAY I'D WANT YOUR HELP! WHO'D BEG YOU FOR ANYTHING!?
Jack: Stop messing with me… Whatever, go on your break, whatever you want. I don't need your help at all!
Floyd: Is that so? Dang, Sea Urchin-chan, you're a boss, running the register and helping customers out all at once~ Mmkay, I'm gonna leave it all to ya then.
[Floyd leaves]
Jack: And hey! You're coming with me! I'll give you my recommendations while I work the register, so you need to stand close enough to hear it!
Scarabia Student: Man, this guy is so restless… At this rate, I shoulda just gone and picked something out myself…
[Sports Field]
Jack: [pant, pant]… AAAAAARGH! EVEN RUNNING'S NOT CLEARING MY MOOD!!
Jack: Sayin' he'll "help" me, or whatever. I swear he just says that to get on my nerves.
Jack: I get that I gotta take this gig seriously, but there's no way I'm gonna get dragged down to his pace… Hm?
Track & Field Club Member A: Geeeeez~~! That guy seriously pisses me off! Why's he gotta keep nagging me about my form each time!?
Jack: Isn't that one of the guys who was training for the marathon the other day?
Jack: Is he just finishing up his club activities? I don't see his partner from the other day… And he seems pretty frustrated.
Track & Field Club Member A: Juuuuust 'cause he's got a little more experience in running marathons doesn't mean he can look down on me like that.
Track & Field Club Member A: I thought if I just saddled up with a guy that had way more experience, I'd be able to participate in the huge meet coming up, but I'm reaching the end of my patience…
Track & Field Club Member A: He gets all snooty every time I mess up even a tiny bit! I'm seriously gonna explode…!
Jack: …Hey, woah. Wasn't he the one saying "my time got better!" last time?
Jack: They were all buddy-buddy, but he's just mouthing off now. Sounds like they were a terrible combo.
Jack: Hah. How stupid.
Track & Field Club Member A: I've already gone through so much for this. I'm gonna do whatever I can to reach my goal…!
Jack: …......
[Mister S's Mystery Shop]
―Day 3 on the job
Diasomnia Student: Hey! When I dropped this plate I bought from you guys yesterday, it broke. I bet it was already cracked to begin with, wasn't it!?
Jack: HUH? DON'T BE STUP…!
Jack: …Ah, I mean, I understand. Please wait one moment.
Jack: Um. Floyd…-senpai.
Floyd: What? I'm in a pretty bad mood right now, since I gotta carry all these heavy things.
Jack: …Uhh… So, uh, can I ask… Can I ask you to help resolve a problem with a customer… Please?
Floyd: Huh?
Floyd: …What's going on, Sea Urchin-chan? You're acting pretty docile today.
Floyd: Didja eat something bad? Or didja just come cryin' to me since you can't figure out how to stop the argument on your own?
Jack: Grrrrr….!
Jack: …[breathes in, breathes out]
Jack: …Yeah. I know you're definitely better suited to deal with complaints like that. So, I'm… begging you.
Floyd: Uh-huuuh… Man, you really are being a good boy today, huh, Sea Urchin-chan.
Floyd: Well, mmkay then. I was just feelin' like I needed to let off some steam, anyway.
Floyd: So, I'll work with the customers instead now. You go and do the stuff I was doing, then.
Jack: …Got it. That'll probably be better in the long run, anyway. Thanks.
Jack: …Whew! Somehow I was able to get through that…!
Malleus: Oh, well, that was surprising. You seem to be doing much better than you were prior.
Jack: Eh!? Ack, Malleus-senpai and Jamil-senpai… Did you see that just now?
Jamil: Looks like you and Floyd are actually working better together as a team now.
Jack: WE AIN'T A TEAM!!
Jack: I was just… using Floyd-senpai!
Jamil/Malleus: USING?
Jack: So, the other day, I saw a few guys from the Track & Field club training for a marathon.
Jack: It looked like they were getting along pretty well, with one guy listening to the other's advice on changing up his form…
Jack: But once the guy who was getting the advice was all alone, he just started harping on and on about the other guy.
Jamil/Malleus: NOT SURPRISING.
Jack: When I saw that, at first, I just thought he was a spineless coward to talk about the other guy behind his back.
Jack: But as I watched him do whatever it took to try and achieve victory… I started to think about how I was going about things wrong.
Jack: I ain't doing what he says because I'm a coward, or whatever. I'm just using his strengths to snag my own victory.
Jack: You two are doing the same, right? You're using each other to bring out the best in each other.
Jack: So am I. There's no way I'd ever want to work with Floyd-senpai for any reason, but to win, I'll do what it takes.
Jack: That's all it is. So please, don't ever say something as nauseating as me being part of a team.
Malleus: Even without similar ideals, you are still able to cooperate with one another. …Wouldn't you consider that teamwork?
Jack: NO WAY!!!
Jack: I don't care to work alongside nor befriend anyone.
Jack: However, now that I've fully gotten the hang of it, I'm going to finish this gig in the best condition.
Jack: The person who'll give his all to this shop and snag that special bonus WILL BE ME!
Requested by @farfalla049.
#twisted wonderland#twst#jack howl#floyd leech#jamil viper#malleus draconia#sam#twst jack#twst floyd#twst jamil#twst malleus#twst sam#twst translation#twst new years
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˗ˏˋWhile the World Sleeps — njmˎˊ˗
00. Profiles Two !
— na jaemin.
Major: Biomed, I wanna be a surgeon :) Likes: coffee, my cats, keeping my peace Dislikes: being centre of attention, writing essays Hobbies: I volunteer at the hospital sometimes, taking care of my cats
needs to warm up to you before his true personality shines through. appears cold to outsiders, but his best friends would argue he’s the complete opposite. when it comes to personal relationships and someone manages to move past that first layer, they know that that person isn’t just anyone. roommates with jeno. practically locked-in with school and getting into med school, but whenever he finds free time in his schedule, he’ll volunteer at the hospital to keep patients company.
— lee jeno.
Major: Kinesiology Likes: exercising, F1, my mom’s cooking Dislikes: equipment hoggers, the dark Hobbies: going to the gym, reading (kind of), gaming (also kind of)
if he’s MIA he’s at the gym getting gains. just wants school to be over—he loves the learning but not the assessments. probably the one who knows jaemin inside-out because they’ve known each other the longest. is actually pretty funny without trying and the group doesn’t know if this is a good or bad thing on jeno’s behalf.
— lee donghyuck.
Major: Music, minor in dance Likes: gaming, music, annoying Mark <3 Dislikes: haircuts, breaking in dance shoes, dress rehearsals Hobbies: playing games and streaming, making covers (still need to release for proof)
is so damn good at his major that he has so much free time. if he’s not doing anything music/dance related he’s cooped up in his room streaming LOL on twitch. loves being a menace to Mark (his roommate) because of how clueless the latter is with his jokes. overall, pretty reasonable with his antics and knows when it’s time to be serious.
— mark lee.
Major: English/Literature, minor in music Likes: museums & parks, deep talks Dislikes: writer’s block/art block Hobbies: writing, making music
almost always busy with schoolwork or personal projects, but tries his best to be active on the gc when he can. he’s working on getting his master’s. usually has the best advice because he’s read so much literature he can pull that knowledge out of his ass whenever he has to.
previous. — m.list — next.
an: the way I didn't even go above and beyond to make an actual character for them but kept them as they would if they were normal uni students im sorry,, i still think its adorable tho :3
taglist: @sibwol @undomielsql
#nct#nct dream#nct imagines#nct dream imagines#nct dream scenarios#na jaemin#jaemin#na jaemin imagines#jaemin imagines#na jaemin scenarios#jaemin scenarios#nct dream blurbs#nct blurbs#jaemin blurbs#na jaemin blurbs#nct jaemin#nct fluff#nct dream fluff#jaemin fluff#na jaemin fluff#my writings#my nct writings#kpop#kpop imagines#kpop scenarios#kpop blurbs#jaemin x reader#jaemin x reader fluff#Jaemin text au#Jaemin text
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been exercising consistently for a month now (4 times a week) and I hate to admit that my energy levels really have improved so much 🧍♀️
#used to feel like crashing after lunch basically everyday and these days I actually feel like doing things...#and it just keeps getting easier to exercise too bc I'm starting to be less sore after each session + it feels sooo good to increase the#weights and know that I can handle it...#it was rly tough in the beginning but once I passed that bit where I would almost always give up it's gotten a lot easier#I don't even have my brain trying to talk me out of exercising anymore#I just get to the time I usually exercise and do it#and not just physically but mentally I can feel a lot less resistance in doing things too#specially with cleaning etc I used to battle it out in my head so much and I'd do it regardless but ik I used to do it very frustrated bc#I didn't Want to do it but these days I barely feel any resistance I just think that I have to do something and I do it... actually feeling#like a functional person woah#jt
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tagged by @shrips for 9 books you'd like to read in the new year! ty for the tag-- i tag @halfagod @albatrossisland @eponine119 @tru-lyly
#some of these i've started (ie the last book is from the library and i've tried doing the exercises digitally)#i've wanted to try learning how to paint rather than just doing flats but it is sooo time consuming man#also a lot of these is literary / academic / jargony but i guarantee you i will read like#only one of them#i'm a little through elite capture and it's interesting but i'm like maaaan this is a little too much like coursework rn#so realistically i will read smoke / martyr / hopefully oil / maybe enayat or burn#kala and my mother laughs i am hoping to get to bc i forget who recced it to me here but i will try.#also for whoever tagged me before for other ask games but i never got to it im sorry ill get better at it next year again#truthfully i think it is bc i am irl more now lmao tag games used to be my no 1 priority#or im sick and am like im not typing shit rn#im sick rn#i really need to get off escitalopram man the Sicknesses are only getting sicker#also shrips if ur somehow still reading all this dont worry abt ur stuff being not literary its p good tbh i feel like#against a pretentious person's judgement#(NOT ME I THINK. BUT THERE R TITLES THT R CLASSICS THERE AND THE PRENTENTIOUS PPL R USUALLY OK W THOSE)
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The consequences of my poor financial decisions are here!!
#blame Kat for this lmao. she got the Yangchen novels first and I very easily give in to peer pressure (that wasn't exerted. but whatever)#three days earlier than scheduled too. which worked out perfectly bc I picked them up on the way home from grandma's#and carried them for 2 km. 2 hardcover books + the thick cardboard boxset they're in#+ the backpack full of food my grandma gave me#in the rain#I nearly fucking died#I'm not made for this level of physical exercise 😅#okay moving on#nia stop calling things like this poor financial decisions challenge#it cost like. the equivalent of 40 bucks#I have 30 times as much hidden away in my sock drawer#and I am usually responsible with my spending. I'm allowed a slightly more expensive treat every once in a while#also my dad doesn't know but I'm sure if I would him 'hey I spent 3.8k on a pair of books is that okay'#he'd be like 'why tf are you asking when have I ever said no to you spending money'#but again. I do try to be mindful#which is why as much as I want the lok art books and could probably ask for money for them. I won't#bc they cost an arm and a leg and I cannot morally allow myself to spend that kind of money#anyway. getting distracted again#do you know how hard it was to get these? I checked like 3 marketplaces before I did#and I was fully ready to get them in russian because non-classical english books are impossible to come by here#sanctions and all that. but somehow I did. and it only cost half the money in my bank account#I don't even know if Russian editions exist. these books were written before the war and before the gay propaganda ban but still#I didn't find them when I looked. maybe they don't sell them now that the law is in place or smth#I don't really care enough to look it up#the point is. I now own the books and can happily read about best girl kyoshi whenever I want#if the stress for an upcoming event doesn't kill me. that is#also I have read rok before but it was 3 years ago so my memory is vague. and I just realised how much thinner sok is?#I'll have to check the page count later
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I've been thinking a lot about how Rook's reunion with his former mentor, Zara, is going to go, and since I can't predict what the DM is going to have her do or say, I can only dwell on what I know is going to happen. Which happens to include taking off the illusion ring that's been hiding his injuries from her. So have a snippet of the description I have planned for that moment:
tw for description of (mostly healed) injuries
He hesitates, twisting a ring on his finger. Looking at it more closely, she can tell it’s very finely crafted, and must have been very expensive. A large emerald is set into the band. Rook sighs, and pulls the ring off his finger in one quick motion. Immediately she’s struck by the difference in his appearance as the illusion melts away. He looks awful. His warm, healthy skin fades to a dull and sickly grey. There’s huge bags under his deeply sunken eyes, and his cheeks are hollowed, as though they have been carved out by an overeager sculptor. He looks like he’s recently risen from the grave. While he was thin before, now she can see his ribs under the skin, and his collarbones are exaggeratedly pronounce. Thin white lines left by dozens upon dozens of recently healed cuts are scattered across his body. On top of that, faded bruises cover most of his visible skin, a mottled mosaic of purple and yellow. They’re clearly days, maybe weeks old, and she can only begin to imagine what they must have looked like when fresh. Bandages are barely visible under his shirt, wrapping around his back, hinting at even more injuries.
#morrigan.text#my writing#dnd writing#oc: Rook#oc: Zara#Poor Zara.#she's gonna feel so fucking guilty about everything that's happened to him in the last 3 years even though it's not her fault.#yes she pissed off Wolf but she had no way of knowing Wolf would go after Rook instead of her.#(I don't even know what she did to piss off Wolf. That's the Big Reveal that's going to happen when Rook sees her again.)#but yeah. Seeing him like this and knowing/thinking that it's because of her actions... it's going to destroy her and that kills me.#I don't know what she did but I *do* know that she never intended for Rook to get hurt. She loves him too much for that.#but Rook could never blame her for anything. He'd forgive her just about anything. And that will probably only make her feel worse.#Rook and his mentors will never ever fail to fuck me up big time.#his undying devotion and naive faith in them which is such a stark contrast to his usual distrust of people.#and it gets him hurt every time even though the don't *mean* to hurt him. But Sigmar's case was definitely much more malicious than Zara's.#this reunion is going to be such a huge turning point for Rook's character and his personal development as a character.#well really it's a combination of things all happening at once that are going to be the turning point.#1) the fact that the party rescued him from Wolf which has literally no other explanation than that they love him and care about him.#2) seeing Zara again and finally getting that closure that he never got three years ago plus being to reestablish the most important#relationship in his entire life. Plus she's just a good influence on him all-around a much-needed source of support after Sigmar's betrayal#3) getting gifted the Tide Breaker (Zara's old ship) and having to learn some responsibility for once in his life will be very good for him#and I guess you could also say that 4) my temporary character Val talking some sense into him has something to do with it lmao.#but we'll see how this all plays out bc while I know these things are going to happen they technically haven't happened yet.#I'm not gonna RP the conversation between Rook and Val bc it would just be me talking to myself for a long time but I am gonna write it up#when we get to that point so I can show it to the DM so he knows what they talked about. Plus it will be a very fun exercise bc Val was#literally designed to be Rook's opposite in just about every way. They're very wise and responsible and Rook is a reckless idiot.#(but I love him anyways.)#So it's gonna be fun to balance writing both of them in the same conversation.#anyways. these tags are SO FUCKING LONG already. If you read this far I'm giving you your favorite dessert and a hug if you want it.#and also pledging you my undying allegiance for life. <3
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you know what I’ve realized lately? that’s really helped? the axiom: it just doesn’t really make that much of a difference. Or at least it doesn’t when you’re talking about good things and not, like, doing good vs. doing evil. Big choices, little choices, decisions, decisions —it’s not just that they don’t matter in the grand scheme of things—because they do! —but just. It won’t make that big of a difference. Life will continue to be wonderful AND difficult, fascinating AND hopelessly mundane, full of roses AND thorns and all the other cliches whether you walk down one road or another. And you’ll get used to the joys and sick of the sorrows whatever they are, and you’ll be ungrateful and bored and dissatisfied in some measure some of the time and you’ll have to work on all the things you have to work on anyways and just. Yeah! It doesn’t make that big of a difference! Even the biggest things!
#as Maria once said to me iconically: marry the guy don’t marry the guy#life is hard and it sucks and it’s also great and little treats exist#and we have to practice patience and virtue and penance regardless of any other circumstances#and God loves us no matter the path we take#like I just. I am reflecting#you know what also made this click for me recently? the limits that can be reached with doing little things to improve your life#like YES. I need to get some exercise and eat some food that is not totally terrible for me and clean my space#but you know the fuck WHAT#(I’m so sorry for swearing)#it doesn’t !!! actually !!!!! dramatically alter my life if I do one thing or another or in a certain order#I could become a fanatical hiker (for some reason I have been seized by the vision of this lately)#and it’s just like. well. yes you could. and you know what it would keep raining sometimes and my anxiety would still exist#and people would still be irritating and laughter would still be real!#anyway I don’t mean to be dismissive over the ways choices can deeply affect our lives#but when the choices are good and the options are good it just doesn’t matter that much#I also realized this with makeup lol. like I reached the point where I was like I could spend more time and effort and money#to achieve a higher level quality of appearance and literally for WHAT#people would still not pay attention to me in the grocery store (lol)#and they don’t need to!!!!! and it’s fine they don’t!!!!!!!#but I just. that voice in my head that’s like if you do X you will experience happiness you have never known#and things will all work out and everyone will be in love you#to that voice I say: well no.#wow this is long but you know what I mean????? it all just sort of matters less in the sense that nothing WE do is going to really#change our lives? I know that’s insane#because people are so insistent that the opposite is true. but like. actually no the most life changing opportunities usually happen#without our control or our scheming or our planning#so of the stuff within our control it’s not that big of a deal!! do good avoid evil enjoy your lunch call your mom!!! but that’s all gonna#keep being the same on the other side of so many many different choices we can make#so yeah
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Lol I keep on doing this, saying I'd come back to tumblr to only disappear again 😂😭
#and i hate it bc i miss being on here#but also i don't have to force myself or feel guilty for it#bc if i'm fr being on social media is just so time consuming and also not what is good for my mental health often#and that includes tumblr#it's not even that it's a toxic place (at least not the content i'm consuming) but sometimes i just rather spend my time with people irl#meeting someone than on social media and like focus on my life#the last month or so was just really difficult for me and i haven't been feeling so bad mentally in forever#i mean it always is like that that time of the year but i feel like i was worse this year#whenever autumn comes around with the darkness and cold i seem to hit a low mentally#when i tell you how much better my mood is in summer spring how much better i feel everyday regardless of everything else#i get people like autumn but for me its literally the worst and winter too altough at some point it gets better#maybe i adapt and maybe because i spend more time outside around christmas when i go home that's usually a turning point#and ig also the lights of december make it a bit better#but mid october to november is awful#this year the weather was much worse beginning of october was much worse#i feel like i lowkey have this seasonal mood disorder idk#but i barely managed to go to classes and i had no motivation#usually i always make myself study and do the things i have to atleast altough i often terribly procrastinate#but now i was barely able to do this and i had things to do but i couldn't make myself i missed a deadline closely#luckily my professors are the best but i felt so horrible for it how i was unable to get it done#sunlight is just so good for my mood and ik how doctors say how you should avoid it because you can get skincancer#but like i'd rather than my mental health being this bad (not that i want either)#i already miss summer so much and being happier#but tbh i haven't felt this good as I do today in weeks and even this whole week was better#i exercised more than usual altough i tried to in the last weeks i couldn't as often as i normally do so maybe this actually helps a lot#and i studied yesterday today and i will tomorrow i finally feel motivation again#besides i also tried to break up with my bf so that was also tough but i couldn't lol#i tried talking to him and tell him in the nicest way but he didn't get what i was trying to do and i couldn't say more bc i felt horrible#but maybe that's for the better altough i had these thoughts for a while that he just isn't the one for me and that we're too different...#i do really like him as a person the way he treats me and i'm still into him but i just felt like it wouldn't work
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Am I weird for trying out a new sport when I’m 22 years old?
#it’s badminton#I tried playing when I was like 8 because my brother played but I didn’t continue#but I’ve always thought badminton is kinda fun#so I showed up to badminton practice in my small town two weeks ago. a beginner’s group. and there were only children there 😭#so I feel really weird and dorky being there#but I just wanna get some regular exercise in my life rn. just going to a place a certain time every week#I go out for runs on my own but that’s hard to do during the subarctic winter. and it’s hard to find a routine during the snow-free months#I never found a sport that I liked when I was younger. I used to have so much anxiety about going to practice so I usually quit after a yea#but my mom made me feel really bad about not having a sport to practice so I’d try a new sport after quitting the previous one. and so on#now that im an adult it’s different tho. it’s on my terms. I’m choosing to do something because I want to#not because my mom is guilting me into doing it#but I still feel weird#and in 9 months I’m probably gonna move to a new city#so it’s like. again I’m trying out a sport and leaving after a year or less lol#but I need the exercise!!!#oh well#personal
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Sending love from one depressive spiral to another.
One thing that's helped me, as I'm coming out of this one, was getting my friends to pick prompts for me (to write in my case) which I then committed to filling BADLY. Because sometimes intending to create stuff that is just dumb and shit, means it doesn't mind that my brain tells me that it's dumb and shit because I'm like "yes brain, I know, that was the brief" and then before you know it you're back in the creating zone again
Tldr: commit to being shit. 🤷♀️
Hello, thank you! Depression is a little shithead because it takes different forms for everybody and sometimes warps depending on the circumstances so even when i think i have a handle on it and can prepare for gaps in my exercise routine that keeps me functional....something will happen and throw me for a loop and im back to struggling. For me, when im like this, that constant voice in my head drowning out everything else - and i mean everything - saying 'you're worthless, this is pointless' over and over and over and over is almost paralyzing. Try writing a cover letter when your brain is telling you that you are probably the most useless person ever and you cant see anything even remotely good about yourself. Its why i have friends proofread if i make any major changes to my generic letter content. Especially this one friend who has the same problem - he cant sell himself, i literally can hear him talk himself in circles into thinking he's old and washed up and not valuable on the market anymore - and i cant sell myself. But i think he's the most amazing talented person ever, and he's never said it but im pretty sure he thinks similar of me, so we check each others work pitches to make sure they sound suitably enthusiastic and glowing. Ive had other people also read my letters but if they dont understand how depression can sit on the brain and make it impossible to write this shit, they dont quite know how to help me. While my one friend who gets it knows that he needs to tell me 'hey, you left out this very important vital contribution to that one project, dumbass' (only nicer lol). So i have one very happy sounding, very aggrandizing letter that i tailor to wherever im sending it. But thats all stuff i need to do. Its vital, its a requirement, i can force myself to sit down and do it.
Personal art isnt exactly a requirement. So instead of making myself sit down and do it, i can just lie on the floor feeling numb and wish i dont exist anymore 🙃
#This isnt a constant state of being btw#And i know it will pass even if this right now is the worst its been in a while#I can already feel it getting better and todays run helped#I need to feel needed again really is what it comes down to#and i miss working with people i miss having a team#And doing what i know i can do and have been working in for over a decade#After every let down i just keep going because i know that that is what im working to get back to#my dad has this too and i think the biggest failure of his generation is being unable to talk about this shit#like i watched my dad go through this and quite often i was his one link to the world family members would talk to me instead of him#because he was so checked out. still functioning at work but with no energy left for anything else.#dad was the reason i figured out exercise was a factor#the only time I could get him leave the house was either the tennis club or grocery shopping#and i think i was around 13 ish when i realized that my brain became sluggish and weird and depressed during vacations#and it was because i quit my usual gym exercise routines#i have never missed longer than a few weeks ever since#i am not kidding about that by the way running multiple times a week every week for over two decades now#except for that knee injury in 2021 when i think i missed 6 months but did light dance routines since i couldn't run#but this sinking void of self hatred im in now is what i am forever running from#anyway but it never occurred to my dad that his daughter may struggle from the same issues
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Gonna go running tomorrow!!!! Gotta hype myself up because i know once my alarm goes off at 6am i will not be as excited anymore ((((: BUT I'LL GO RUNNING!!!!
#i just#need to get some actual exercise#where i can completely exhaust myself#i mean. i get some pretty exhausting 10 minutes every morning on my hike to class#but i want something a bit longer and something that will end in a nice shower and not in a seminar room#I'm just a bit scared of how it'll go because so far the paths where people exercise are also occupied by other people#and then there's bikes that might kill you if you don't watch out#so i wanna go early so i hopefully avoid random people taking a painfully slow walk in the middle of the path#so you can't pass them#but I'll be moving!!! fast!! i cannot wait tbh#i should have gone tonight#(watch me oversleep and be too unmotivated to go tomorrow morning... istg if i don't get up at 6#I'll still go at 8 or 9 or 10 am and have to live with the consequences of the paths being crowded#I'd go to bed early but my neighbors keep me up until 2am every night so that's fun#but the running will be worth it#(I'm not even a runner ㅠㅠ i just need to substitute my usual high intensity workouts with something other than pilates and yoga#i mean it's definitely not bad to be forced to do something out of my comfort zone but i really miss my jumping around time)#void screams
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currently obsessed with in-universe roy/jamie rpf. have you any thoughts on this topic?
So.
I am assuming that this in partially in reference to that fic that's been making the rounds and I did read the fic and I do have one opinion on the fic that has haunted my waking hours which is:
Why would Roy's sister be into X-Files fanfic?
I'm not saying it isn't possible, and this may be a stupid hill to die on, but given her assumed age bracket this was not the fandom I would have given her.
The interest in medicine. The familial brand of sarcasm and sharp wit. The easy assumption that since her brother also has a bit of a dark sense of humor ('avenge me, keeley', ropes) she likely does as well.
You fools. She'd be into House MD.
(no disrespect at all to the author your fic was lovely I am just very much from the age bracket in question and this one detail threw me for a loop the way different experiences sometimes do)
#as for the actual thrust of your question my short answer is idk#usually when i think of how the media audience would work in ted lasso i just...get sad#because it's never just the fans that love you#there's also the fans that despise you. that are watching to see you fail#'the crowd that applauds your coronation is the same crowd that will applaud your beheading' etc#so like with in-universe rpf that would be just a small token of what they have to deal with#and like i get it. this is supposed to be just a fun exercise#fandom looks at fandom through the meta lens of fandom#and this sort of contemplation completely ruins the mood (sorry)#but when it comes to in-universe rpf this is where my mind goes#so yeah i am definitely not the guy to write this fun zany plot#i'd be like 'well roy is used to no privacy having been a dancing monkey in the media spotlight for twenty years'#'every public breakup every ex who spilled gossip about what he's like in bed'#'every time he went through a checkout line and there was a tabloid photo of him in sweatpants with a circle drawn around his crotch'#'so roy thinks he deserves a goddamn break. also how is this different from the sexy polaroids people used to send him?'#and jamie would call him a fossil and tell him people don't do physical photos anymore they do photo manips#and then jamie would show roy a picture on his phone of roy and ted spooning in the moonlight and roy would throw the phone out the window#(and secretly maybe roy's a little hurt because no one ever considers that maybe he'd like to be the little spoon)#ask box is always open
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I : majored in english, has a masters degree in it, studying philosophy, and have been an English teacher/Junior translator for almost a decade now.
My grandma : there is our future doctor <3
#i still to this day don't know if she's in denial or thinks what i'm doing is a hobby#it gets funnier every time#especially today#i was like 'mimma i just came back from work i'm so tired' and she was like 'i make food right now for our future doctor'#like ???????#grandma i love your food pls don't give it to someone else#who doctor ? doctor who ?#me ??????#that is so NOT my career#my already existing one that i fought my entire bloodline for put aside#i can never be a good doctor let alone willingly choose it#1) i suck at biology and science and those pure memorization shit#2) i'm really sensitive to blood or injuries i might faint at just the mention of certain stuff (surgeries are crossed off i would DIE)#3) it's just not meant to be and that's okay#as a society we can't survive with one or two careers all of them are important in their own way#an exercise i would usually tell my students to do at this topic#is everytime you feel like someone's job is useless to close your eyes and imagine a world without it#if i managed to convince them hurray to them#if i didn't i ask them to imagine someone they care for work hard then get told their job is useless#(that on usually does the trick)#the thing is even if you're stuck with a job you hate or can't find a better one#there's still some impotance to that job in a way like they offer service or blah blah#yet it will suffocate you because it's not the career you were meant to have#that summed up means the work environment/pressure/nature are what we really define as useless because they can be unfair#but not the work itself#when we delete those previous stuff off the definition all careers are equally important#i hope i was clear#and i also hope my grandma remembers that too#story time
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