#I just found out my slayer is going through a completely different trauma

[toomanylizzes]

Trying to not look too deeply into the fact that my favourite pieces of media consumed as a teen involved protagonists burdened with sacred duty who then became increasingly traumatized as the series went on, and then were more or less denied the emotional and mental help they needed because they were too important to saving the world and thus had to be Strong Enough to face the Great Evil they were prophesied to thwart.

[peachdues]

THE GREAT WAR (PART I) — ANNOUNCEMENTS AND CONTENT WARNINGS

Well, this one has been a long time coming, hasn’t it?

My goal is to get Part I completed and published this weekend. It will be roughly 25-26k words in length.

I’d really appreciate it if y’all can read through this before you read Part I. The Great War is very different from my other fics, in terms of both style and the general setting, so I feel it necessary to give some context.

First, The Great War is a non-linear story. This might seem a bit confusing, given that Part I takes place over the course of a little more than a year. However, you’ll likely notice there are some gaps in the story as you read through — these are intentional. While Part I is a chronological telling of Reader and Giyuu’s relationship, Part II features several major flashbacks to events that occur during the timeline of Part I that are not actually shown in Part I. So if you find yourself getting curious about when a character finds out a bit of information, or referenced some past occurrence that you didn’t read — know that it’s intentional, and it will show up in Part II.

Second, Part I of The Great War follows the canon timeline as closely as possible, with a few minor deviations. There are references to multiple canon events in the series, and I tried to follow it as much as I could. Huge shoutout to @/demonslayedher her incredible timeline.

Third, the reason TGW has taken so long is that I tried to be as historically accurate as was feasible to both Japan and its culture. That said, Shinto shrines and the practices of Shrine Maidens in particular were heavily cracked down upon by the Imperial government during the Meiji Era (the era immediately preceding the Taishō period in which Demon Slayer is canonically set). Obviously the reality of Shinto shrines and their practices during that period complicates the setting of TGW, and particularly, the Reader character, so I took some creative liberties. However, I do reference the fact that the Shrine where the Reader trains is not what it once was, and it functions more like a girl’s boarding house/school, where the girls who live there just happen to also be educated in Shinto practices/Shrine keeping.

Fourth, because there are a lot of references to Japanese culture and practices, I will link an addendum for your reference. The most important things to know is that Miko means “Shrine Maiden,” which is why it is used frequently.

Finally, I do want to acknowledge that the Reader is given a slight description — namely, in terms of her hair. It is described as very long, and when discussed from Giyuu’s perspective, he frequently depicts it as “silky.” This is not meant to be exclusive in any way — lots of hair types can be silky. I do make a very conscious effort to avoid using physically describing my Reader inserts (apart from acknowledging their beauty because, guess what? You’re all beautiful!!) But as the story is set in Taisho Era Japan and Reader is a Shrine Maiden, I found it difficult to avoid giving some vague description of her hair — especially given its importance with respect to a certain gift she receives from Giyuu during Part I. Please know that these references come up very sparingly, and again, I do avoid going into greater detail. Beyond that, she is only described as beautiful from Giyuu’s point of view.

Now, onto the content and trigger warnings.

Like most of my works, The Great War contains explicit sexual content, so minors do not interact.

This next warning is not so much centered around Part I, but more for the story in general. TGW is heavily centered around Giyuu attempting to deal with his trauma following the end of the canonical series — and it does feature violence as well as instances of PTSD. I don’t believe anything is too graphic, but it’s just something to keep in mind. That said, his PTSD will not appear in Part I — however, it will be a main focus of the story from Part II, on.

So, here are the warnings for The Great War

CW: explicit sexual content • MDNI • loss of virginity • unprotected sex • virgins being virgins • oral sex (F!receiving) • squirting • fingering • Giyuu is obsessed with Reader’s pleasure • creampies • semi-public sex • tbh they fuck everywhere but the bed • mention of pregnancy • protective Giyuu • possessive Giyuu • Giyuu is a simp for one person and it’s Reader • pregnancy (later)

TW: canon-typical violence • strangulation • PTSD • depictions of trauma • nightmares • some angst • Giyuu struggles with communicating his feelings • brief instance/implication of stalking by a non-canon character • mild description of panic/anxiety

My goal is to have Part I posted this weekend, so here’s to hopefully seeing y’all soon!

[thelongestway]

Sorting The Slayers: Lina Inverse (Bird Primary/Lion Secondary)

While on the surface The Slayers is a comedy, it's not one of my favorite shows of all time because of the fun. It's one of my favorite shows because, despite all the slapstick, it's very Bird fun. And this is because the main character, Lina Inverse, known as the Enemy of All Who Live and the one Dragons Step Past Out of Clear Revulsion, is a Bird Primary. Admittedly, that Bird has basically built a Lion-flavored system ("No rights for the wicked!") and has a LOUD Lion Secondary. But in her heart of hearts, Lina Inverse is a Bird, and the Slayers, centered on her as it is, is a Bird/Lion show (and also why the later seasons are sad: they completely lose the Bird). To get at Lina's Primary, you have to pay attention to how she fights. While she talks up a big game about "yup, one spell and you're DEAD", in reality she chooses her fights. She takes the higher ground, she chooses the right spell for the right situation (and has an absolutely dizzying array - it's not just the Dragon Slave), and she is incredibly inventive. When she has no magic and has to face up against an augmented mage that is her equal in spell level, she holds him off for a good few minutes with nothing but a Light cantrip, using it as a distraction and as a dispel for a shadow-based spell. She has a tactical teleport (which she only used once, as it's situational), all sorts of elemental spells, and a bunch of her own creations, which she uses to good effect. Even her Charging is incredibly Bird-flavored. When she gets locked into chains that electrocute her whenever she casts, and her partner says "Well, you can't use magic and they took my sword, what can we do?" Lina goes: "No, it's not that I can't cast. It's that it hurts to cast. That's different". And then she casts through the pain. This is her common pattern: Lina assays the situation and then turns on Lion mode to Deal With It (or, when the situation calls for less destruction and more thought, she also has a fun Actor Bird Mode she uses. "I am a merchant's daughter, after all"; "Oh wait, the heroine is supposed to be all shrieky here!") Lina also has a robust set of rules she follows. "No casting spells that give me nightmares" - and after using an incredibly effective spell that rips trolls to threads, she never uses it again. When Amelia, who at the very least models a loud Lion primary (need to rewatch to see what's under that, because she and Phil have a lot of trauma going on), asks her to teach the most powerful widely-known spell in all Black magic, Lina instantly imagines Amelia blasting someone who found a coin with it and basically starts stalling for time (instead of just going "nope"). When pressed, she snaps: "The most powerful spell in the world is useless if you don't know when and where to use it!" And yes - when deciding to risk destroying the world to save a person she loves, she DECIDES to take that risk. It's a question she grapples with and makes her decision. Lina's Secondary is basically how she's coded as a character (redhead with red eyes, come on, you can't get more aggressive visually). Lina obviously enjoys just blowing things to oblivion, going in to deal with things, and generally enjoying the limelight. Her secondary is in her iconic speech: "Where monsters rampage, I'm there to take them down! Where treasure glitters, I'm there to claim it. Where an enemy rises to face me, victory WILL BE MINE!" And she means it. When the men on her team go "we're going to die but we must fight," Lina goes "nope. I'm fighting to win." Not because that's a gut feeling (although she values her gut highly - her Bird has basically built her a Lion system), but because "if you take that attitude, your chances will be zero." All in all, Lina's a surprisingly healthy character when it comes to both Primary and Secondary. Her Bird is well-developed and serves her well, and her Lion, very powerful and fun, is not at all out of control - instead, it's carefully guided by her Bird.

[livinginthefifthdimension]

Papamaru!

"Desist."

This one went more KohRin than anything but this prompt was hard!

XxX

“Desist.”

Rin sat completely still behind the oak with Kohaku at her side. Things had gotten out of hand. She was girl enough to admit that. What was supposed to be a verbal hashing out of feelings and desires had quickly devolved into something sordid and unsupervised.

There was no sense in running. Lord Sesshomaru was not known for being given the slip and -to add insult to injury- there was no guarantee he wouldn’t drown them both for the insult of having to chase after them.

But she’d rather die splashing in a puddle than allow him to find her covered in kiss marks, clutching her kimono in her hands like strumpet.

They had one shot, one faded, rusted chance at survival and Rin lowered her voice, knowing it would do no good, but desperate either way. “If we can get to Lady Kagura-.”

Kohaku nodded once, grabbed her hand, and began dragging her through the trees. What a foolish plan that was.

Lord Sesshomaru landed in front of them, a blur of red and white, and a vision of disapproval. “Fix your top, Child.”

“Lord Sesshomaru-,” Kohaku’s words died in his throat as her guardian’s anger flared red and surrounded him like a bad omen. Rin was making her peace with the after life when a gust of wind announced the arrival of their life line.

Lady Kagura landed at her Lord’s side, the demon slayer moving to the other side of him. No one said a word and so Rin focused on the stars, wondering if she’d join them when they found a puddle deep enough for their purposes. She’d stood a chance of pleading her case against the man who’d raised her. He was reasonable, most days, and maybe -just maybe- she could make him understand that they were old enough to be wed. Sixteen was not so different than twenty and she knew what she wanted—

But Sango would not be so understanding. She cherished her brother and she’d made herself crystal clear about when he was allowed to marry.

“When you’re old enough to know what you want then what you do is your business, but, until then, you are mine to protect.” She hadn’t budged on that. Now Rin had drowning and blunt force trauma to look forward to because he had not done anything to her that she had not done to him.

“What were you two doing?”

Lady Kagura was not helping.

She covered her painted lips with her fan, snickering when Lord Sesshomaru’s lip twitched.

“Just kissing, I swear!” Kohaku was making them look guilty. His shaking hands and darting eyes o giving the wrong impression, but she knew better than to draw attention to herself and so she watched Kohaku shove his foot in his own mouth.

“Then why is your top unbuttoned.”

How was Sango scarier than the demon lord? Rin shuddered, praying their end would be swift.

“I didn’t say it didn’t get out of hand.” It would seem they were going for honesty. What a choice to make when being stared down by the strongest of their species? Maybe, if they could be so lucky, they’d have ‘honest and stupid to the very end’ engraved upon their headstones.

Sango’s boomerang clicked against her dragon scale armor. “Do you have nothing to say for yourself?” That was directed at Rin.

“Not really.”

Lady Kagura’s laughter was really not helping matters. “You’re both acting like you never made out with someone in the woods. Are we going to kill them for being teenagers?”

Rin heard that unspoken ‘perhaps’ ringing loud and clear.

“I had my tits out all the time trying to get Lord Stiff Ass’ attention. And you— Sango, you were playing grab ass in the woods with that perverted monk of yours. So,” She stepped away from the other adults, moving to stand between the teens. “Why don’t we cut the act? Besides! It’s not like their proposal agreement isn’t already drawn up.”

“That’s not the point.” Sango insisted, “the point is that I knew what I wanted and I suspect Sesshomaru did as well otherwise he wouldn’t have gone through the trouble of bringing you back.” There was a long, awkward silence as all eyes fell upon Kohaku. “Or have you figured it out?”

He nodded once, digging his fingers into his palms as he took a steadying breath.

“I have. I,” his apprehension was bouncing along his skin like fleas and Rin boldly took his hand. She supposed it was time for her to take a stand as well. “I want Rin. Forever. I don’t know if she wants to be a demon slayer and I don’t know if we’ll have kids, but none of that takes away from the fact that I want her.” When no one budged he added, “I don’t need to know everything. That’s enough.”

Lord Sesshomaru turned on his heels heading back the way he’d come without a word to them.

“Honestly, Kohaku, you couldn’t have kept your mouth shut for two more weeks?” Sango sighed in utter defeat as Kagura pulled her feather from her hair and tossed it at the ground.

“The twins will be in your hut when you return, Slayer. After all,” Rin could just make out the small smile that he threw over his shoulder, “A deal’s a deal.”

[musingsofanunorgainizedmind]

Top 10 Things I Love About Supernatural

It’s been almost half a year since the show ended and now that the dust has settlIed, I just want to list ten reasons I love this show. Despite it’s flaws, it’s been quite the ride.

1. Team Free Will

When I first got the idea to make this list, I originally planned on doing entirely separate entries for “Sam & Dean” and “Destiel”. Except then I wanted to pay tribute to “Sastiel”. And then I wanted to do an entry for “Team Free Dads”. By that point, I was already halfway through the list and I hadn’t even moved on from the main characters. A few months ago, I made a post about why I love every single pairing in this group. Obviously, Sam and Dean are a legendary duo. Obviously, Dean and Cas have an unparalleled story. Obviously, Sam and Cas are an underrated team. As for Team Free Dads, I’ve always had a soft spot for father/mentor figure characters and and all three tackle the role in different ways. I love Jack, too. I love how everyone in this bizarro family is “broken” in some way. We’ve got the Allistair’s prized pupil, the spawn of satan, the boy with demon blood, and the angel who nearly obliterated all of heaven. But they help each other heal by being supportive and seeing the good in each other. They all love each other so deeply and when together, nothing can stand in their way. Not Michael, not Lucifer, and not God himself. They tore up the book and wrote their own story. And it was a pleasure to watch it all unfold.

2. The Suppporting Characters

To list every single supporting character I have loved and lost in this show would take way too long. I don’t know if it’s the writing or acting performances, but I love pretty much every single supporting character on this show. Even villains like Azazel or Allistair are top-notch villains. Hell, I even like characters like Metatron, Lucifer, Mary, and John! Characters like Rufus, Charlie, Crowley, Rowena, Kevin, Ellen, Jo, Bobby, Gabriel, Balthazar, Mick...how am I not supposed to love them??? All of their stories were cut so short. I’d watch a show about any of these characters. The Wayward Sisters were robbed. So many ships were gone too soon (Sam/Rowena, Dean/Jo, Cas/Meg, Etc.). So many heartbreaking deaths. I want to be best friends with all these characters. Why be a “dean-girl” or a “sam-girl” when you can be a garth-girl? A kevin-girl? A claire-girl? A bela-girl? There are so many great characters with interesting and compelling backstories and so much untapped potential. I could go on forever on this, but I digress.This show has one of the best supporting casts I have ever had the pleasure of watching.

3. The Themes

It’s no accident that I got addicted to this show at the time that I did. Namely, my Senior Year of College and 2020. Graduating college and entering the “real world” felt like it’s own sort of apocalypse. 2020 definitely exacerbated my worst tendencies. Messages like “family don’t end in blood”, “you can write your own story”, and “always keep fighting” really resonated with me. I could definitely relate to the feelings of insecurity these character’s felt and the ways they suppressed/repressed their issues instead of facing them. I could relate to the feelings of not fitting in and I could definitely relate to the loneliness. This show helped remind me that I’m not alone. That it’s okay if my values and identity don’t line up with the what I envisioned for myself. And, most importantly, that there is a light at the end of the tunnel and that I should never give up. If Dean, Sam, and Cas can keep moving forward despite their demons and despite how bad it gets, so can I. Regardless of how the story ended, these themes resonated with me and I’ll still hold them with me. A single episode can’t take that away.

4. The Fun Episodes

This show has so many legendary standalone episodes. Changing Channels. Ghostfacers. The French Mistake. Fan Fiction. Tall Tales. Bad Day at Black Rock. When this show goes for the absurd, it goes all-in. It takes the risks it needs to take, it gets completely insane, and it pulls it off. So many of these episodes could have easily been the moment that the show “jumped the shark”. Yet, time after time, the show delivered on it’s potential. I don’t know how much I can say about these episodes except that they made me laugh out loud, made me fall even harder for these characters, and that they’re the episodes I remember best. If I were to rewatch any episode, it would be one of the fun ones. This show knew how to not take itself too seriously and how to poke fun at itself. I’ve always had a soft spot for shows that can make me laugh and cry (X-Files, Buffy the Vampire Slayer/Angel, Doctor Who, etc.), and this show definitely nails the fun part. 

5. The Sad Episodes

Death’s Door. Hammer of the Gods. Despair. Carry On. Abandon All Hope. In My Time of Dying. Swan Song. When this show wants you to cry, it doesn’t pull the punches. It gets downright devastating. No character is safe. Literally every character you love will either be forgotten or will die. Or both. The amount of trauma Sam and Dean have to go through is insane. Both have literally been to hell and back. Both have killed countless people, including innocents. When this show decides it wants to wreck you, it’s overwhelming. I sobbed when Bobby died. I sobbed when every single member of Team Free Will died for the final time (I still can’t watch any of those scenes). I still wish Jo, Ellen, Charlie, Kevin, Mick, and Gabriel had been given more time to tell their stories. Being a hunter means a life of endless angst. Being an angel or demon doesn’t get you off the hook, either. I remember going into this show thinking it couldn’t hurt me. My favorite character type is “mentor/father figure”. But holy hell...I don’t think every single sad moment was necessarily good writing, but when it was? Damn. 

6. The Biblical Themes

I’m not a relgious person. But, despite this show being steeped in Christian mythology, it really touched on my feelings about the Old Testament in a profound way. Well, really just Ben Edlund and Robbie Thompson did. I’ve never seen a show really hit the overall feel of the bible the way this show does. The idea of Angels as mystical and terrifying creatures. The idea of God as a flawed father figure with a penchant for wrath. The sheer epicness of the biblical stories. The idea of family members constantly being turned on each other. Cain and Abel. Jacob and Essau. Moses and Ramses. Moses and Aaron. Abraham and Isaac. The bible is full of stories of family drama. This show doesn’t always give angels and demons weight. Sometimes it’s silly and stupid and cheesy. But when it hits right? It’s epic. This is more of a personal thing I love about the show, but definitely a plus!

7. The Music

The early seasons music is so good. I really miss the classic rock of the golden era of the show. I mean, there are still some great musical moments later on, but damn. I loved hearing songs I recognized and I loved learning new songs. I loved when the song and the scene hit perfectly in time (Death’s intro. Cas’s return in Season 13.). Also Supernatural wouldn’t be Supernatural without the ‘Carry On My Wayward Son’ song at the end of every season. Even at the end of a season I didn’t love, that recap would always get me pumped. Also Chuck singing Fare Thee Well? Dean and Lee singing together? Fan Fiction? All great. 

8. The Cast & Crew

I never care about the actors or actresses in a show. I definitely don’t bother with the names of specific writers and directors or their styles of writing/directing. They’re just random people who happen to write for or play these characters I love. They’re not actually the characters. But these guys? Well, for one, I’m pretty sure half this cast actually is their character. At least to some degree. They’re also just...really cool people? Who are all friends? They make a point to do community service, to interact with fans, and to promote positive ideas. Jared’s Always Keep Fighting campaign. Misha and GISH. The fact that they all participate in fundraising opportunities and encourage fan engagement. Do they all have issues? Definitely. Have they said stupid things? Yes. But the good far outweighs the bad. They’re an entertaining bunch whether onscreen or not and I hope they all do well in whatever their future endeavors may be.  

9. The Fandom

I joined this fandom late. To be honest, I thought this fandom was obnoxious before I found myself a part of it. Now that I’ve been in the trenches? It’s got it’s ups and downs like any fandom. There are some parts that are more toxic than others. A lot of people yelling that their opinion is the only opinion. But overall? The good outweighs the bad. And the good? The good is great. Some fanfictions I’ve read are better than actual books I’ve read and just as moving. The fanart? Incredible. I love reading all the metas about random aspects of the show I never would have noticed. I love the music videos and I love the analytical videos. In real life, I’ve made many friends through our mutual love of this show. Hell, even getting sucked into GISH once or twice has given me some solid memories and brought me closer to friends. I wish all fandoms were this much like family. I’m so glad I got to be a part of this fandom and I can’t wait to continue being a fan. After all, nothing ever stays dead in Supernatural.

10. The Chaos & Insanity

Season 16 has been a time. First, Destiel went canon. Then suddenly Sherlock was having a 5th season, Putin was retiring, and Georgia was going blue. Destiel going “canon” and Joe Biden winning the presidency will always be correlated in my mind now. Things in the fandom went from quiet to blaringly loud real fast. Carry On happened. The fandom went into a civil war. I can’t even remember half of what happened in Season 16, but it’s been a wild ride. There’s been ups (my personal favorite being the french dub and the Saileen wedding). There’s been downs (Jared’s controversial statements and the original scripts being leaked). At one point Misha Collins had sex with Bill Clinton???? It’s been a wild time. It’s honestly gotten me through the end of this pandemic. At least it’s entertaining. I would say that at least all the craziness is over, but is it ever really over? Every time I say that something else completely insane happens. But it’s been fun. I’m glad I started watching this show despite my reservations and here’s to whatever happens next. 

[skvaderarts]

Hiraeth Chapter 14: Affirmation

Masterlist can be found Here!

Chapter Fourteen: Affirmation

Note: Sorry this chapter is a few hours late! I live in that part of Texas where all the bullshit is going on with the power. Woke up the morning to a $50 electric bill FOR ONE NIGHT. My apartment is only 1100 square feet. The bill was $12 the day before that. Let that one sink in. But anyway, this is one of my favorite chapters so far! Very exciting stuff! I hope you like it! 

-~-

A gifted storyteller is capable of drawing their audience in. They are adept at holding a certain level of intrigue and suspense, forcing their audience to pay attention, lest they miss something crucial and ruin the experience for themselves. An inexperienced or lesser storyteller bored their audience or drove them away, serving as nothing more than a momentary distraction from the usual pace of their everyday lives. But under this very specific set of circumstances, no one present was sure where to place the experience they’d just suffered through. 

Each of them felt a great sense of conflict deep within themselves as they considered each and every word that they’d just heard. It was a strange and unsettling course of action, one that made them desire to do nothing more than curl up and withdraw from the subject at hand. They believed every word that they’d just heard, but they couldn’t tell if that was a good or a bad thing, especially when it came to the subject of the story that they had just been told. The fact that he was both the narrator and the main focus of the experience meant that it was entirely believable, but completely unfathomable, like a destiny nightmare that none of them wanted to look in the face. That would make it too real; give it too much power over them. But regardless of their stance on the matter, it had happened, and it did affect all of them to some varying degree.

V had always possessed a certain gift for speech, despite the fact that he wasn’t a man of many words. His tone, cantor, and temperament combined with a keen intellect and a nearly flawless combination of memory and repertoire meant that he was perhaps the most engaging person that they currently knew to talk to. But that entire combination became the absolute worst thing that someone could experience the moment that V decided that he needed to get the traumas of his past off of his chest and into the open air. After all, V was exceptionally strong-willed in regards to his emotions. When something affected him deeply, it tended to be negative, and it was almost certainly beyond the scope of what any of them wanted to know about. But if he was willing to give them a glimpse into his world, then they wanted to take the opportunity to peer inside and take in every bit of information that they could.

None of them really knew what to say when he seemed to reach the end of his horrifying tale of sadness and pain. Every word that he’d spoken had carried such a strong hint of anguish, terror, or apprehension that it made it physically unnerving to listen to, but as much as they now wished that they could take back the experience, they were grateful that he’d decided to share it with them. It put a lot of things into context that none of them had been able to understand before, and despite the fact that certain aspects of his life would now haunt them for the rest of time, they felt better for knowing them.

Was it possible to be grateful to someone for telling you something that you’d have been happy going your entire life without knowing? Because if it was, then they were. But if they weren’t, then would that make them too immature to comprehend the suffering of someone so near and dear to them? Was it selfish to desire ignorance while assuming that they were strong and powerful and possessed the necessary strength and tenacity to recon with such an experience, but simply chose not to in order to spare themselves the suffering that one who deemed himself weaker than them had already survived? Was that entire line of thinking too philosophical for a matter that was both so very complicated but oh so simple? None of them could say anything at the moment, so they didn’t say anything. They simply waited to be sure that V was either done talking, or that he was waiting for them to say something, anything to break up the tense silence that had settled across the snow like a blanket soaked in glue.

And after a while of waiting in silence, totally unsure as to what to do next, Vergil decided to break the silence between them. He’d never been one to follow the lead of others, and he sure wasn’t going to start now. And as far as the concept of taking the time to feel the weight of his words upon those who he’d directed them towards, he didn’t feel he had the time to waste. A direct approach was required in a situation like this, especially when there were so many questions that had been raised during his time speaking that could dissipate from his psyche like so much fog after a storm as a result of his prolonged wait. He had felt an intense desire to not interrupt V, owning to the fact that he feared that if he was stopped, he would love his nerve and decide that he didn’t’ wish to speak on such matters after all. But now that he was at least somewhat sure that his eldest son was done talking for the time being, he was ready to start asking questions. Best to catch him before his threshold for conversation was exceeded and he shut down like an engine in disrepair.

“...You said that you desired to pick a random direction and leave. Why?” Vergil adjusted his posture in his seat, his head coming to rest against his palm as his elbow planted itself firmly in the arm of the chair and the devil slayer in blue crossed his legs. It was all that he could do for the time being to placate the murderous rage that he felt brewing in the very back of his subconscious. Never had he desired to end the lives of so many people that he’d never met before. “And for that matter, where did your travels take you after that? Was the end result desirable?”

The young while haired summoner in black afforded himself a moment to ponder his father’s question before responding, unsure as to what to say. On its surface, it was a simple enough question. Vergil had no way of knowing how deep the answer had the potential of going. And it was a good question at that. It seemed that his father desired to simply take what had happened as an unwavering fact and build off of that, taking the time to let his mind settle before venturing forward. He believed him and didn’t seem to desire to question his motivations for doing anything that he’d done, respecting his capacity to make his own decisions. Or maybe even respecting the decisions themselves. He couldn’t be sure just yet. But there was a part of V that couldn’t help but wonder what Vergil might do with the information afforded to him now that he had so much time on his hands.

“It was something that I was accustomed to by that point. Something familiar when nothing else was. I’d spend the better part of my youth going back and forth to new and unknown places in the hope of a better outcome. But I learned quickly that while many things changed as you went from place to place, people largely stayed the same. And the problems that came with them only reset to start anew.” V grew silent, his eyes wandering across the room towards Nero. He sat quietly on the couch towards the right corner, twiddling his thumbs in complacent horror as though what he’d just heard had probably changed him in some profound way, or at had at least his perception of his older sibling in a substantial way. It was a stark contrast to Dante, whose uncharacteristic silence, thoughtful posture, and calm atmosphere mirrored his older twin’s in a way that was as fascinating as it was unsettling. V didn’t know what to make of it. “As for the end result of this particular expedition… well, it led me directly to you. It took a few years, but the result was worthwhile, I think. I was lucky enough to be taken under the wing of a group of outcasts, and I spent a substantial amount of time traveling and performing with them, only to end up in Redgrave City the night that you happened upon me. I was out for a walk when we happened upon one another on that street corner, and everything that has happened since has been nothing short of extraordinary. And harrowing. Especially that.”

The Darkslayer tilted his head to the side, leaning back slightly. “I take it that you do not remember much of what occurred that night, then. Perhaps that is for the best. The end result was, as we all seem to agree, undesirable. Though it was never my intention for my actions to lead to the consequences that they did, they did so regardless.” He seemed to consider his next statement for a moment before speaking, V’s retelling of his farrowing ordeal weighing on him in a way that he was not accustomed to. Oh, how things would have been different should he have been there. How the tables could have turned in their favor. But despite his best intentions, Vergil was more than aware of the fact that there was little that could be done about what’s he’d missed in his past. There was, however, a substantial amount that he could, and would do now. “Saddling you with a death sentence as soon as I discovered that you were alive after all was as far afield from what I intended as it could possibly be, but it happened anyway. Things never seem to go according to my plans. But I can only imagine that that may be due to my pension for creating them without taking every variable into account, and for not having all of the relevant information in the first place.”

Dante felt tempted to point out that Vergil had essentially just apologized to V, but he decided to leave the matter be. There would be time enough later. For now, he was going to take in the scene before him and silently contemplate his overall role in the situation. Though to say that the same part of him that felt somewhat responsible for Nero’s suffering as a child didn’t yearn to have been able to do something more for V would be a lie. Financially unstable as he was and always had been, he would have taken them both in without a second’s pause if given the opportunity. They would have all benefited greatly from having someone, anyone to call family. At least biologically.

V seemed to take his father’s words to heart. He’d been in situations of his own that lent themselves to the same vicious pattern of failure, regret, and sacrifice. It was what had led him to become the person that he now was. But he didn’t know Vergil’d particular brand of suffering, and he hoped that he never would. Although he could be mistaken, he was willing to believe that there was a part of Vergil that did in fact long for the time in their lives that he’s missed out on. The Darkslayer didn’t come off to him as the kind of person to willingly walk away from something so integral to him. Maybe it was time to get to the heart of the matter. After all, things couldn’t really get any more uncomfortable, could they?

“The vast majority of us do not plan for or wish for the consequences of our actions to play out in the way that they do, father, but that does not change the fact that we must account for them, accommodate them, and answer for them regardless of our desire to do so.” V crossed his arms loosely, making eye contact with Vergil in a way that unnerved both him and everyone else present. Something had shifted in V’s demeanor, and it was evident to anyone who spared a look at him. It was as if a certain level of inhibition had fallen away from him and he felt the freedom to say something that he’d always wanted to; the confidence to be heard and understood. “If I could have planned out every little detail of my life, it would have played out significantly different. I would not have spent my youth bounced back and forth between numerous orphanages. I would never have voluntarily chosen to be able to see the things that I was able to see. And I most certainly wouldn’t have undergone the extensive and invasive mental evaluations that I was forced to undergo out of the fear that I might actually be as insane as everyone around me seemed to collectively assume I was. But unfortunately, that is now how things went. But I can say for sure that I am done running from them. Whether I face them down or flee for my life, I will still have to do battle with them, so I might as well face my fate on my own terms.”

Nero and Dante gave one another a surprised look, the eldest of the two shaking his head as if he were physically trying to shake off how surprised he was. His eyes widened slightly as his eyebrows raised, seemingly taken by surprise as he lingered on the gravity of what V had just said to his father. As far as V’s normally sedate and polite tone and manner of speaking went, he’s essentially just put Vergil in his place and given him a piece of his mind, and the eldest Son of Sparda hadn’t said anything to correct him. Perhaps he was just impressed with the nerve he’d just demonstrated? Or perhaps it was something more substantial? It was hard to say when it came to his older twin.

Vergil leaned forward, giving V an unflinching piercing look as he seemed to dwell on his words. He half expected V to flinch or turn away, but he didn’t, and there was a part of him that was admittedly genuinely impressed by his eldest son’s sudden shift in tone. Something had seemingly clicked for him that hadn’t before, and it was evident for anyone present to see. For lack of a better way of putting it, after recalling such a harrowing experience, V just seemed utterly done with being at the mercy of his enemies, and it was time that he did something about that.

But there more to his statement than that, at least from where Vergil stood. V had just done something that he was confident that his son had never done before. He’d addressed him as just that: his father. In all the time that they’d spoken prior to that moment, V had been, for the most part at least, nothing but polite and upfront with him, but he’d never said anything that indicated to him that he was willing to verbally claim him as his father. And at that moment, he’d finally done so. Vergil hadn’t realized how much he needed one of his children to do that in a sincere way. Nero had called him as much before, but this was different in some way. There was no anger behind the abjection; no ulterior motive or thinly veiled layer of something secondary. No, it was just as simple as that. As simple as a son addressing his father as exactly that in a moment that told him that he was indeed making some headway with his sons. And as far as Vergil was concerned, he didn’t think that it was possible for him to be more internally pleased about that revelation than he already was. And although he hid it well, there was a part of him that was deeply touched by something that simple. For the first time in a long time, Vergil didn’t know how to take a statement that had been given to him at face value, and it was an incredible thing to behold.

“You have something you want to ask, don’t you? I can tell. Come out with it then. You’ve come this far in regards to expressing your desires. Why stop now? What is it that you truly wish to ask me? Because I can tell that there is indeed something that you desire to make known, and we only have so much time.” Vergil broke eye contact with V for a moment to turn his attention to Dante, his intention to speak with both of them clear. It seemed that his message was something universal between the four of them, a topic that none of them wished to approach, but were going to have to at some point. “It could be substantially less world-ending than you might imagine. Take it from someone who is less… adept at doing so when it actually counts.”

Dante didn’t miss his identical twin’s message. Neither did Nero or V for that matter. Though they were all equally taken aback by it, they were willing to absorb the context of it and accept that there was some truth to it. They did in fact all need to find a way to express their true thoughts and intentions more clearly with one another than they had been, regardless of the strides they’d made so far in regards to improving their communication with one another. Going forward, this was their chance to do something meaningful. They needed to seize it.

V looked at Vergil for a moment, his posture and overall demeanor softening significantly as he suddenly looked tired. It was different from how he usually seemed when he was in such a state, more emotional than physical. Talking about what occurred had drained him in a way that he was not accustomed to, and it showed, but he knew better than to simply give in and allow his inhibitions to get the better of him. Maybe he should just ask as his father had suggested? At this point, what could it hurt?

“I want to know why you didn’t know I was alive. And I want to know why I’m able to see the things that I can see. I’m willing to believe that it is… abnormal for a child to be able to do what I was able to do, even by the standards of our family.” V went quiet for a moment, blinking rapidly for a moment as he suddenly felt a rush of emotion that he couldn’t’ quiet place. “And I want to know if you would have come looking for us if you had known. What you would have done.”

The demon slayer in blue’s posture changed slightly. It was something that Dante picked up on more than the rest of them did, something that Vergil didn’t generally do. Even under the most extreme circumstances, Vergil never slumped, not even a little. Or at least, he’d never seen his twin brother do so. It was almost unnatural how such a small thing unnerved him. A quick look in Nero’s direction was all it took to see that he was watching the situation intently, seemingly invested in Vergil’s answer. Dante repressed the urge to sigh in discomfort. The stakes were high this time.

“Please. Don’t’ say something you’d normally say for once, Vergil. Just this once. This really isn’t the time to do that to them. Put them down gently if you have to. I don’t think that they are in the mood for that right now. Even if it’s the honest truth.”

Much to his surprise, Vergil looked over at him for a moment. It was as though Vergil had heard his younger twin’s thoughts. While his facial expression was largely unreadable, they both seemed to know at that moment what Vergil was going to say, it made them equally uncomfortable. Vergil, because he knew the truth, and Dante because he was almost certain that he didn’t want to. Nothing in the blue devil’s life was ever simple or good in that kind of way, and something told him that there would be repercussions for this one.

“Bold of you to assume that I didn’t look for you, V. I did. For countless hours in countless places until every just started to blend together into an amalgamation of all the ground I’d already tread before then. During the pursuit of what I’d lost, hopelessness set in and brought the bitterness that I’ve carried with me for so long with it.” Vergil paused for a moment, his eyes drifting over to Nero. This was not the kind of conversation that he could leave his youngest son out of, no matter how much he wanted to. There was no delicate way to put what he needed to say. All he could do was hope that they took it the way he meant it, and not in the way that they were entitled to. But that was their prerogative and their privilege, if one could even call it that. “And then somehow I looked up and I was in Fortuna. And I met her. And then I arrived in Redgrave City a lifetime later only to find that perhaps the only time I truly allowed my grief to consume me that the very person who had sought to comfort me in such a state had been left in a truly regrettable state as a result. And so had the result of our one fleeting night of passion.”

Vergil realized quickly that neither V nor Nero were truly able to take in the severity of what Vergil had just implied, or the fact that he’d been so open and honest with them about something he had tried so hard to keep buried deep within himself. A heavy sigh betrayed his true emotions, as did the sad, sly smirk that ghosted his face for the fleeting moment that he’d been unable to contain it. 

“I find it almost genuinely ironic that I managed to get myself into this situation twice without realizing it. I never considered myself unintelligent, by my actions certainly lend to that conclusion. Much as the horror of my existence has led to the trauma and pain that paved the dark path that I walked in solitude for the majority of my life, the regret I have caused and have left behind has been all that I have left in my wake.” He faced them all, accustomed to even attempting what he was doing at that moment. Vergil wasn’t entirely sure he recognized the actions that he was taking as his own, but he accepted the reality and the truth behind them nonetheless. This was long overdue, even if it was something that he truly didn’t know how to reckon with. But V’s words about the reality of taking responsibility for the consequences of one’s actions had resonated with him, and he could no longer deny that. “It is almost humbling how much I truly regret the depth of the suffering I’ve caused, and for that… I am sorry. There is more that I could have done that I did not, and I can only hope that it brings you some small measure of satisfaction knowing that it will eternally haunt me.”

For the first time in what felt like ages, Nero shook his head, a troubled look on his face. He couldn’t even begin to put into words how Vergil’s confession affected him, but he still felt the need to get something off of his chest. He had a lot of questions, but he knew he’d get to the root of them eventually. For now, he needed to say something that he now realized he’d needed to say for a long time, and he just hoped that it wasn’t too late. The things he’d experienced that day had affected him deeply in ways that he could never have imagined when they’d boarded the train to Lucia’s house. It was enough to physically give him whiplash.

“No, that doesn’t bring us satisfaction. Were not sadists. I mean, you might be but… More suffering isn’t going to bring any of us that. I’m pretty sure we’re all tapped out by now.” The short white-haired devil hunter sighed, unsure as to how to take the number of eyes that were on him at that moment. He wasn’t shy, but that didn’t make this any less awkward. It seemed that he wasn’t the only one accustomed to him being this serious. “Look just… fix it, okay? We both know you can. All of us do. You just fucking suck at forgiving yourself for literally anything you do, and it really shows. Stop kicking your own ass so hard, and start fixing the shit you broke in the first place. That’s our job. Nothing’s gonna change otherwise, ya know?”

Both V and Dante looked Nero up and down for a moment as though he’d been replaced by another individual that they didn’t recognize. While they shared his sentiments, they were still shocked to hear Nero be the voice of reason among them during such a heavy conversation. Maybe they had written him off too soon as a lost cause in that regard. Vergil nodded in agreement, a single barely noticeable gesture that carried a weight that he himself wasn’t entirely privy to. He would try as he had done with everything else that he had committed himself to in the past. It was all he could do. And he could only hope that it would be enough.

Just as they were attempting to figure out where they needed to go from there, the door swung open with a surprising amount of force to reveal none other than Nico. She was covered in a grey substance that looked like dust or ash, and a look of both shock and excitement adorned her face. She was practically jumping up and down in glee at whatever she’d just seen that had led to her returning so suddenly. The four of them shared an apprehensive look before turning to see what had captivated her in such an intense manner.

“Oh, for fucks sake! What the hell did you do this time, Nico?! We don’t live here!” Nero started before Nico hushed him, pointing over her shoulder towards something out of sight behind her. A resounding boom that carried both a strange sonic tone and a defining shake followed closely behind as if he’d triggered it just by willing it into existence. Now she had their attention. How had they not noticed that something more was going on? Had they been that focused on V’s retelling of his tragic and harrowing ordeal?

“Listen here, shit for brains. That is why I’m here.” She turned back towards the open door, gesturing for the four of them to follow her. “Get off your buts, grab your weapons, and follow me. You’ve got to see this!”

The baffled descendants of the Dark Knight Sparda all looked at one another before silently objecting in some way shape or form and then obliging her. At the very least, they needed to see what she was talking about. And by the sounds of that boom, it sure as hell was something. One could only hope that it was worth their time. And Nico rarely disappointed them.

-~-

Phew! That was an awful lot, wasn’t it! I like these long chapters though. And I especially like writing them after I have to deal with stupid stuff. Serves as a great distraction from the reality of the fact that I still live in this capitalistic hellhole. But that’s neither here nor there. I hope to see you in the comics! And as always, I hope you had a good day! I’ve had a few people use the form already, but I’d love it if you went and checked it out! I’ve compiled quite the list! See you in the comment section! Bye-bye!

[takaraphoenix]

Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Season 6

1. Favorite character of this season?

I absolutely love how they dedicated this season to Buffy's issues. She died. And was ripped out of heaven. She lost her mom and was suddenly forced into being the adult in the house. It's so much and she gets to break about it. Yes, she hurts the people around her, but honestly... it kind of figures? How is one supposed to adjust to what she is trying to adjust to? But over the season, the wake-up calls she gets – the asylum episode, Dawn's stealing, Willow's addiction and then the grand finale that makes her realize she wants to be in this world – it's so great, because it goes... slowly.

My biggest issue with most modern TV is that it's basically torture porn. The main character is put through impossibly traumatizing ordeals but is never even given the chance to cope, to try and deal with it. The issues are never addressed, only glossed over because actually dealing with them would require care and good writing and take time away from all the other drama going on! So characters are only traumatized for shock-value and then are immediately over it, even though it's unrealistic.

This season is a season of trauma. A season of bad coping mechanism, of pushing people away but still seeking someone where she can feel safe – Spike. She slowly has to relearn to open up and let them in, she has to learn to want to live again. And it's hard. And the show doesn't shy away from it, it doesn't shy away from her making the wrong choices, because... there is no one right choice that is obvious when dealing with the trauma she has faced.

2. Outstanding minor character (positive or negative)?

Negative. Jonathan. I just... I really truly hate that Jonathan is in the trio. Of all people, Jonathan. The one who gave Buffy her class-protector award with that heart-warming speech. Buffy was the one person who saved him, personally, when he wanted to commit suicide. Even after the Jonathan Superstar episode, Buffy was gentle and understanding with him. It just... for him, to turn supervillain like that was incredibly disappointing for me.

3. Favorite character dynamic?

I genuinely love the Tara-Dawn dynamic. Tara and Willow raised her for months while Buffy was dead. But the Giles-Anya dynamic is also so great – I'm very soft for the way Anya points out her hair is blonde in the finale like “Buffy is getting hugs for short hair. I too would like a hug”.

4. Favorite canon romantic ship?

Buffy and Spike... in the first half of the season. The way she found him to open up to, he was the only one she voluntarily told about having been in heaven. She finds a connection to him. The way he loves her – that he stayed, for months, even though she was dead, because he had promised her to take care of Dawn and he didn't just do that, he helped the Scoobies protect Sunnydale. He had no reason to and it still... it bothers me so much that everyone continuously belittles Spike's love for Buffy like it's not there. If he was only lusting after her, he would have ditched town after her death, he wouldn't have helped defend Sunnydale and take care of Dawn.

5. Least favorite canon romantic ship?

I'm having flashbacks here but it's a tie and it's because of shit decisions Xander and Willow made.

It's strange, I want to love Willow and – as a friend – she is a great character, but she's just... a shitty partner? She cheated on Oz for weeks or months with Xander and now she used magic to play with Tara's mind. That is so... violating and disturbing and that, after Tara found out and confronted her about it and pointed out how incredibly wrong that was, even more so with Tara's past, Willow just went and immediately did it again. And this isn't something you can blame the addiction for; this was just “I don't want my girlfriend mad at me so I'll erase her memories”. It's... just so bad.

The other being Xander and Anya, even though I love Xander and Anya together, but... the entire season was a steady build-up to “Xander REALLY doesn't wanna get married”, literally from the first episode on. He tried to hide the engagement as long as possible. Then he just... makes these disturbed faces every time someone brings up the married life. They had a whole sing and dance number about their doubts. It's just so very evidently clear that he doesn't want to get married, but he takes until the wedding itself to realize and just... leaves Anya at the altar and then thinks he can get her back? Genuinely thinks they could just go back to being in a relationship? But after leaving her at the altar acting like she owes him something – when he watches her and Spike have sex?

Sometimes, it feels like Xander and Willow really live to sabotage their own happiness.

6. Favorite episode?

Once More With Feeling – it's just one of the most outstanding episodes, really! The songs are so brilliant, the emotional arcs this episode for everyone – from the Spuffy to the per-marital issues between Anya and Xander to Tara and Giles' doubts. It's really brilliant. Many shows after have tried to make a musical episode happen and, with luck, they're fun or comic-relief, but... none have lived up to the standard set by this one.

7. Least favorite episode?

Oh, that's an easy one. 6x19 Seeing Red, where they made... Spike, at this point honestly, completely OoC by having him try to rape Buffy. That will never come off as anything but OoC, not after all that has happened between them. Yes, they are violent with each other – but that's a mutual thing, they hurt each other. This was... terrifying to watch as a teen and it hasn't stopped being upsetting and disturbing. And then they top the episode off with Tara being fridged.

I know fridging is technically the act of killing a female character for the sake of a male character's suffering, but... it's gay fridging? It's not even entirely a Bury Your Gay; Tara dies specifically for the pain and suffering of her lover. After everything Tara's been through in life and after everything Willow has put her through this season, they barely just rekindled... and she gets killed off.

8. Favorite Monster Of The Week?

Aesthetically and what he brought to the show? Sweet from Once More, With Feeling.

But I think that Stewart from Hell's Bells also really stood out. The fact that Anya's past came back to haunt her – because she was a demon for a century and she tortured people for a living. She doesn't even remember this guy whose life she ruined and he comes in to ruin her wedding. And in the end... he wasn't even the one to ruin it, the viewer gets one last moment of hope when it's revealed this was a fake-out, that he was not “Xander from the future” but a vengeful demon... but even without Stewart, the wedding didn't happen.

9. Least favorite Monster Of The Week?

Not too many monsters of the week going on, really. Probably Wig Lady from 6x12 Doublemeat Palace, because all the implications of cannibalism in that episode were really very disturbing.

10. Rate the overarching villain!

Brilliant. 10/10. Holds up so well.

Seriously, there is this... frustrating part where Xander's character just does not hold up at all because of the casual sexism and gross over-sexualization of his female friends. Which figures, because that's how a Nice Nerdy Guy was defined in the 90s (and, if you look at modern TV aimed at nerdy guys like The Big Bang Theory, still is). It's just a trope from TV and movies that for some reason really worked back then but nowadays when we look at sexism and the behavior of men toward women with different eyes, it is really appalling and upsetting.

In the case of the nerd trio, this worked out really well for the show, because it only makes them even more effective villains. They are ridiculous losers, total nerds who think they are owed womens' attention. Their schemes are literally straight out of comics but for the dumbest purposes – they make an invisibility ray so they can go into a women's only spa to spy on naked ladies. They create mind-control devices but for the purpose of enslaving women into their sex-puppets.

It is so gross, so ridiculous and inexplicably still somehow funny, because it's straight out of comics. Freeze-rays? Invisibility-rays? Self-destructing lairs? Jet-packs? It is not out of this world, this isn't how Buffy the Vampire Slayer operates, this is a show about monsters and demons and they're turning it into a whacky scifi show and it works.

Then there's the fact that they're just... three dumb losers? I mean, last season, Buffy literally slayed a god. Shows like to escalate. The Big Bads become bigger and badder each season, but... where do you go after you killed a god? Instead of trying to immediately one-up the villain factor, they did something incredibly brilliant. They took all the steps back.

The villains aren't the focus of this season. The focus of this season is what I answered in the first part of this post. Buffy's mental health and readjustment. You can't only focus on that though, you do need a villain and for that, an overarching villain of some loser nerd bois who fail the majority of time are perfect. They're nuisances that make Buffy's life marginally harder at times, but they're not an overall, serious, actual threat that may end the world.

And still they... got Tara killed. In such a... human manner. An angry man-child who hates women comes in with a gun and shoots her. And there's nothing the demon-slaying good guys can do about it. The bullet hits – not the target it was intended for – and takes an innocent life. Just like that, Warren manages what the hellish bad guys from previous seasons hadn't managed; he kills a Scoobie. Angelus killed Jenny, Drusilla killed Kendra, those were the only major deaths at the hands of villains that we had on this show so far and both were minor characters.

Bonus: Other thoughts?

Dawn was so draining this season; she got better in the last quarter of the season but the majority of it... The stealing, the behavior, the blaming Buffy for absolutely everything – Willow got addicted to magic, it's Buffy's fault, they have no money and Buffy has to go and work to earn money and it's Buffy's fault that she's not home, Buffy died to save Dawn and somehow it's Buffy's fault too because she left Dawn. Just... how can you possibly be this self-centered...? It's so exhausting, even more so in the season that has Buffy suffering the most and instead of being a supportive, helpful sister, Dawn acts like she's the victim of everything...

And I understand, Dawn has been through a lot too – losing her mother, losing Buffy, learning she isn't human but just a mass of energy – but there is a difference between suffering yourself and placing all the blame on other people and pretending that the world is against you, instead of tackling your own issues and problems yourself? And stealing from your friends, at that.

And no, being fifteen isn't an excuse for not seeing beyond yourself. Fifteen year olds are sure old enough to be self-aware... This “fifteen year olds only see themselves and only care about their own suffering and everybody else is to be blamed for how shit their life is” is just... another cringey Teen Girl Trope. Seriously, why did they just cram every single bad trope into this character...

[elizadushkudaily]

“The year has been in some ways just extraordinary in a beautiful way and it’s been in some ways extraordinary in a really challenging way,” proclaims Mapplethorpe producer Eliza Dushku.

From almost any perspective, that seems like an understatement from the Buffy the Vampire Slayer alum

Married last summer and expecting her first child this summer, Dushku has seen her more than a decade-long endeavor on the Ondi Timoner-directed film about the controversial and hyper-stylized photographer successfully make it to the big screen. After a premiere at the Tribeca Film Festival last year, the Samuel Goldwyn Film distributed-picture, with former Dr. Who and The Crown star Matt Smith in the title role, made a leap today with openings in NYC, LA, Atlanta, Boston, Philadelphia, the nation’s capital and more.

At the same time, Dollhouse star Dushku was thrust into a controversial spotlight of her own as it was revealed that the actor was paid $9.5 million to settle sexual harassment claims on the set of CBS’ Bull concerning star Michael Weatherly. Coming less than a year after Dushku herself spoke out about being sexually assaulted by a stuntman on True Lies when she was 12, the Bull situation originated from The New York Times publishing information from a leaked probe of ex-CBS boss Les Moonves’ behavior and the overall culture at the company.

Restrained by a non-disclosure agreement as a part of her settlement, Dushku nonetheless penned an op-ed in her hometown paper the Boston Globe in December 2018 delivering her side of the story. “I didn’t leak the story, but I was not comfortable with the false narrative that had been propagated, as I wrote about in theGlobe piece,” Dushku told me this week.

Walking a legal line, the op-ed laid out as much as Dushku could what really happened with Weatherly. The actor also detailed why as a once expected series regular, she suddenly was written out of the Amblin Television-produced series after just a few episodes in its first season after presenting her concerns to the network.

I sat down with the frank Dushku recently to talk about the making of Mapplethorpe, where she’s at now and how the current Boston-based Lesley University student got there this year.

DEADLINE: So, as Mapplethorpe is about to open in L.A. and expand across the country, and after a year of, well, a hell of a lot, how are you?

DUSHKU: I am well, thank you. I’ve become good at sort of compartmentalizing even if some people see that as a good thing, some people see that as a bad thing. The year has been in some ways just extraordinary in a beautiful way and it’s been in some ways extraordinary in a really challenging way. However, I feel like this field that I’m studying now, holistic psychology, is about combining all of these — you know, your mind body and spirit — and it’s exactly what I’ve needed and where I’ve needed to be.

So I feel like the universe was looking out for me in that. And in another sense, everything was supposed to happen for us to get to Matt Smith playing Robert Mapplethorpe. He is so good in the movie. Even people that don’t love the movie, they love Matt Smith in the movie.

DEADLINE: In that vein, I know Mapplethorpe was not a film that came together quickly, but how did you get involved in your first run as a feature producer?

DUSHKU: Well, the first time my brother brought me the script from the original writer was 14 years ago. We partnered with Ondi Timoner, the director and co-writer, and optioned the material from Mapplethorpe’s foundation, and it was a long, rough ride.

DEADLINE: How so? I mean, I’d assume one of the hardest parts would be getting the foundation on board.

DUSHKU: For us, there were a number of challenging factors. We had different other cast involved at different times. We worked on the script with the help of the Sundance Institute. We had taken the script to the producer/writer/director labs and wanted to do it right.

DEADLINE: Was Sundance helpful?

DUSHKU: Yeah, it’s a tremendous resource. They do exactly what I was talking about. They bring incredible mentors, and [Robert] Redford himself is up there. They’re giving filmmakers the tools to shoot scenes and then they critique them, and we were really lucky to have some Sundance love.

DEADLINE: So, talking about that rough ride, where was the love harder to find, so to speak?

DUSHKU: (Laughs) Look, this is a business, and as we all know these art movies — whether it’s Frida or Basquiat — they’re not typically a Marvel movie in terms of the return. So you have to sort of find the right financiers for a movie that want to tell a story that’s important.

DEADLINE: Did you think of packing it in by, say Year 10?

DUSHKU: Honestly, sometimes, sometimes. I remember reading about Frida and Salma Hayek, talking about how she’d worked for 12 or 14 years on that movie. This was like just a few years into Mapplethorpe and I thought, “What, that’s insane, how could anyone spend that much time?” But every time it felt like the movie had fallen apart, and there’s no way to put Humpty Dumpty back together again, the sky would open up and a glimmer of light would come through and we would sort of like chase that light. We found ourselves like hopping on a flight or going and meeting this person or chasing every leaf, turning over every stone.

We came so close to missing the window and I think you do, you get a real sense as a producer that’s invested in it that long that you’re leaving something behind, and it really has your sort of print on it and this one makes me really proud.

DEADLINE: Besides actually getting it made, which is a massive accomplishment, what makes you so proud of Mapplethorpe?

DUSHKU: When my brother Nate first brought me that script, I wasn’t familiar really with much of Mapplethorpe’s work. I mean, I knew he took some dirty pictures and I knew that he also took some flower pictures and I knew a little bit about his relationship with Patti [Smith] probably, but nothing substantial.

It wasn’t until we really did a deep dive into his work and met with his foundation and we ended up traveling to Florence for a day to see an exhibit where they had surrounded the David statue with his photographs and I started to realize what an international impact this artist had. What a great American artist he was. The guy was a trailblazer, he was a cultural lightning rod. He was so really brave and imperfect, but we also explored his complicated relationship with his family, his relationship with his religion, and with his peers.

We tried to get to the why and the what drove him. You see his journey and where he began to sort of reconcile in himself that “I am an artist and I have something to say that’s very different than what anyone has ever said.” I thought that was extraordinary, and that was where I saw so much courage in him. I mean, you think about being homosexual and doing what he did in today’s day and age would be challenging. Think about it 30 years ago.

DEADLINE: I do, and I think about it in the context of today’s day and age, as you said, and, to be honest, some of what you gone through …

DUSHKU: Yes, I mean, it’s terrifying. In many ways, we’ve regressed so much when we had made so many strides.

When you talk about Mapplethorpe and back in the ’80s and you’re talking about censorship and First Amendment rights. Yes, of course, there’s the irony of the year that I’ve experienced in terms of silencing people and big corporations. The silencing people in this day and age.

DEADLINE: You mean like NDAs and legal threats?

DUSHKU: To some degree. It’s scary, and I think, frankly, people need to be outspoken and say “We’re not accepting that.” That’s not who we are, that’s not what our democracy is based on. We have our First Amendment rights, and we intend to use them and not have people strip them from us.

So, to go back to Mapplethorpe, it’s extremely relevant right now. Also, in some ways, it’s wild because of the amount of time that it took to make this movie and yet the way that everything has lined up and the timing feeling so important and relevant. The anniversary of Mapplethorpe’s death was 30 years ago last week. The movie is now out across the country and expanding, and he has this beautiful exhibit in the Guggenheim in New York right now. It’s sort of this time of all things Mapplethorpe, so we have to believe that there’s something kismet in that.

DEADLINE: To shift gears, obviously the sexual harassment that happened to you on Bull and the millions CBS paid out in the hopes it and you would go away put a different spotlight on you last year when a copy of the internal investigations over Les Moonves and the overall culture there was leaked to The New York Times. Even with the NDA you signed, you not long after penned an op-ed in the Boston Globe on some of your side of the story, and people should read that, can read that if they want to get your POV. But in terms of NDAs, you recently said you believe that they re-victimize, what did you mean by that?

DUSHKU: As we just talked about in terms or our rights as Americans, and to be able to be complete people, we need the right to stand in our power and in our truth. When you rob somebody of that or when you threaten somebody, it’s really damaging. It’s damaging beyond my business or it’s damaging to a person’s personhood and that is what I’ve really struggled with and realized over the last year.

DEADLINE: How?

DUSHKU: As I’m studying trauma and addiction and holistic psychology and the way we store things in our bodies, I’ve also watched this year and I’ve talked to other women who have been part of the #MeToo and Time’s Up movement, and it’s been a year of reckoning.

It’s time for us to be open about that and say, “No, we’re going to stand in our truth, we’re going to stand in our power.”

DEADLINE: Do you think that #MeToo and Time’s Up can really work, or do you think that Hollywood eventually will revert to its tried and true and bad ways when it comes to sexual harassment, sexual assault and the culture of complacency?

DUSHKU: I’ll say this: In my case, what made me feel a responsibility was the fact that I had been around for so many years. I have been around for almost 30 years. I had worked and built myself up to a place where you know I wasn’t off the bus and yet on a set, I didn’t have a voice. After all those years, to find myself feeling powerless and feeling victimized was not — it was more important to me to tell the truth and face the consequences.

I didn’t leak the story, but I was not comfortable with the false narrative that had been propagated, as I wrote about in the Globe piece. That’s what I’ve been trying to do. But, as you said, I took the opportunity to fully respond to the leak in the CBS case. I responded very deliberately and very intentionally with my Globe piece in many ways in hopes that then I would be able to go on and celebrate the things that I have worked so hard for and on, and not have the bad behavior of men and others define my life going forward.

DEADLINE: Clearly, that’s not where your head is at…

DUSHKU: This year did shake me, you know — didn’t break me, that’s for sure. Like, this is one of my first trips back to LA in a little while, and I actually spent the morning with the three heads of the Time’s Up organization and Mr. Steven Spielberg.

DEADLINE: What was that discussion like with them and the man who, among other things, is the boss of Bull producers Amblin TV?

DUSHKU: Good. We sat and brainstormed and discussed possible solutions for this systemic imbalance of power, the abuse and harassment that we’ve been seeing and hearing and experiencing and both in our industry and beyond. That’s something that you know that I can and will continue to contribute to and I want to look at it from my own experience.

DEADLINE: Do you think others, at that meeting today and otherwise, get that?

DUSHKU: Yes, I think this is a movement. This is not a fad and that’s one thing that was really clear in talking with these women this morning. We need strength in numbers. We need allies like Steven Spielberg, and of course, we do need the media to tell the stories and to help lay responsibility and accountability where it needs to be.

DEADLINE: And for you?

DUSHKU: I want to look at it from a holistic healing perspective and the work I hope to do there. You know, I wouldn’t sit here and say it’s all very exciting, but I think we all at a certain point realize in our lives that as everything starts to intersect you do start to figure out sort of who you are and what you’re here for. I think one of the hardest parts when we’re all facing the different forms of adversity in our lives, is that we do end up carrying a lot of shame. We do end up covering things up and hiding things and then if you come out with things then you have to face the sort of backlash or the opinions of everybody sort of looking at you and judging you. It can all be really overwhelming and you can feel like you just want to numb out and escape. Now, I’m learning to transform that into something that might help someone else.

Of course, I understand that journalists have their job and that they have to ask, but I also would hope that that’s something that people pay attention to. That part of my being able to heal and to move on is to be able to stand in the power that I produced this movie for 14 years and it’s doing incredibly well and we’re expanding this week. It’s an accomplishment having been an actor for so long, as my first feature as a producer and yeah, I’m really, I’m really psyched about that.

DEADLINE: No argument there…

DUSHKU: Yeah. I’m not only in service of Mapplethorpe, I’m in service of everyone that came together to make this movie. While my story is important, I’ve talked about it, I’ve written about it. Now I want to be in service of this movie and this story and everyone that worked on it.

DEADLINE: So what’s next?

DUSHKU: (Laughs and points at her pregnant belly) Well, my next major production will be this summer in July and that’s right here. Other than that, I mean, god, to look back at almost 30 years in this business I feel like I’m just so grateful, I’m proud of so many of the things that I’ve done as a producer. You know, I was a producer on Dollhouse and that was an incredible experience. My brother and I also had produced a documentary about Albania with PBS, and it’s on Amazon now called Dear Albania.

So what’s next is just having that freedom to tell any kinds of stories that I want to tell that are important to me.

[redwoodrroad]

🖊 !!!

!!! oh man i really wanna talk about morten because for all i draw of him i dont talk about him enough. here’s a pretty recent screenshot of him in Skyrim, the game i made him in:

his full name is Morten Alexander Iversen, and i originally made him uuuhhhh over 6 years ago, i dont really remember but it was the first time i played skyrim–i actually named him after the lead singer of A ha, Morten Harket lmao, because i wanted him to fully encapsulate that like Nordic / Norwegian vibe (and also at the time i had an obsession with a ha and lbr it never went away); his last name is just a name i found, and his middle name is a reference to my own last name!

some general info: he’s got shoulder-length black hair that he does fishtail braids with, one on either side of his head that follow the curve of his head until he reaches the back of his ears, and then he lets it down; he also has light blue eyes, a Pretty full beard, and several scars on his nose (they might be hard to see in that picture but i draw them pretty prominently). he’s probably about 7 feet tall in-game, but in any modern retelling i do with him, he’s about 6′2″. he also has a deep voice but no, like, traditional nordic accent. if you can imagine like an east coast accent that isnt quite southern, isnt quite northern, it’s like…. somewhere in there. in the game, he tends to wear heavy armor, but he prefers using a bow for most situations and then switches to a sword with his right hand and ice / fire magic with his left hand. i dont wanna fill up my followers’ dashboards, so if you’re interested in reading about him, i put it all under the read more! :D

so in the game, he’s a nord as i said, but he doesn’t completely align with the nords–i have an ENTIRE sociological mock-up of the culture of nords in skyrim, and to sum it up, they’re very conservative, theyre close-minded, and they dont care for people (even among their OWN people) with mental illness / disabilities, people who arent so much power- / dominance-oriented, or, say it with me now: gays. on that list, morten falls under all three! hat trick!! so he kind of keeps away from his brethren in that regard; he’s also a very quiet person overall and prefers to not be in big crowds or even in big open spaces, he really likes his solitude. which is tough when youre the dragonborn and everyone knows it rip

speaking of being dragonborn, i imagine that his dragon is like…. an entire personality within himself. not that it has really any agency, but it’s a nagging sensation that draws him towards what dragons want: power, money, sex, food, naps, etc. morten’s dragon is very dominant and wants morten to go all out–it wants him to fight everything, garner lots of wealth, reach a worldwide level of notoriety, and like anything else you can imagine a greedy, power-mongering dragon might want. morten himself, however, does not want any of that; he just wants to chill. so you can imagine the duality there, huh. more physically, his dragon is like an ice-oriented dragon, so morten’s shouts (while mechanically can be whatever he wants because it’s all in the game mechanics) in my mind always have a little twist of ice. he prefers the ice-oriented shouts, and anything else not related to ice will still have little ice particles come out (even if they might be melted by fire-oriented shouts). likewise, morten’s use of magic with his hands are always ice- or cold-oriented

beyond the dragon, he has terrible memory problems, and ive worked the canon amnesia into something of like…. a trauma response? it’s way too much to go into and also has to do with some of my personal childhood experiences, so for now we’re just gonna let it be shielded by amnesia; likewise, that sort of brain-haziness also applies to present memory-storing, and morten really has trouble remembering names, dates, conversations, and even situations even as he is adventuring through Skyrim. this also applies to processing issues–he for sure has dyslexia, and not just in reading; he might hear a sentence but parse out the words in a different order–and over-stimulation, which is really why he hates being around other people or even talking to other people for a long period of time. he also suffers from depression, anxiety, and paranoia, and because of all these mental things, he really found himself becoming drawn to the Prince that oversees this general sphere of mental health: Sheogorath. during that quest where the dragonborn helps him and pelagius inside pelgius’s mind, morten was incredibly drawn to sheo and in my mind took time to sit with sheogorath at the end of the quest just to chat because sheo made him feel like…. that haze that covers his brain just lifted and let him think clearly without the stressors of the outside world affecting him. even the dragon soul stopped yelling at him in that moment because it too was soothed by sheogorath’s presence. so with that, morten grows closer to sheogorath, and in my canon, they chill out a lot in skyrim haha

i also want to say that morten grew really close with the greybeards–particularly Arngeir. Arngeir, being really the only one who Could talk to morten and who always had such helpful wisdom for him, really became something of a father figure to morten, and without needing to, morten returns a lot to the temple to just chill with arngeir, he just loves him so much.

finally, i also wanna talk about his relationships: he becomes the thane of Whiterun first and meets Lydia, and they become absolute bros. later down the line, he meets a guy (havent figured out who it is yet, might end up being an OC) who he falls for a little, and they have a thing for a long time–until this guy starts becoming really abrasive with morten and displays such a lacking in understanding of morten as someone with mental illness, so he leaves–and he’s replaced later by the beautiful and adorable Erik the Slayer, whom morten meets as the dragonborn normally does in Rorikstead, and after he gives erik’s father money for erik’s armor, and after a few months when he returns to find erik trying to become a hired mercenary, morten asks him to join him in adventuring. it takes some time, but there’s a mutual crush, there are late-night chats under the stars, drunken storytelling that involves coming-out stories and previous bad or silly relationships, and eventually a big gay kiss. and of course, a marriage in the temple of mara. i may or may not have had to hack the game with console commands to let morten marry him because he wasnt romance-able but we’re here now and they live together in the Lakeside Mansion just outside Falkreath. morten also meets Serana during the Dawnguard dlc and becomes bros with her too (and introduces her, the raging lesbian, to lydia, the rampant bisexual, and you know).

sheo is still a huge influence on morten’s life, and there are TONS of silly instances where both erik and sheo have to sit in a room together and just kind of accept the fact that on one hand morten is sleeping with an actual terrifying daedric prince and on the other hand morten is married to a boring mortal and not a fun daedric prince, can you guess which one of them holds which opinion

so right now, morten is happily married to the love of his life, he has some pals livin it up with him in the upstairs bedrooms and a prince who visits him occasionally, and his little farm is full of chickens and cows and horses and a library tower full of books and a full garden outside WITH BEES, and hes just living his best life !

thank you for asking!! i hope you enjoyed reading about my boy!! he’s my blog icon, and i love him so much. also feel free to check out my “morten tag” tag if you want to see like general vibes about him, aesthetic posts, meme shit that reminds me of him or might be something he would do or like, and art ive made that features him! and thank you again ;u;

[onceuponamirror]

I think Sabrina is a little... questionable. I found the race depictions to be so problematic, in a way that tells me the showrunners thought that by casting a diverse cast they were done, when really they played into so many nasty race stereotypes and tropes that it ended up reading so offensive to me. (1/x)

For example, this show did not issue a trigger warning for an image of a lynched Black woman in 2018; it comes on suddenly and in close-up view. To do so without warning was so tone-deaf: It feels rare to go a day without seeing some news story about brutality against Black people. Showing it on a fictional TV show as one storyline of many felt like needless insult to injury, and it’s a telling marker of whose trauma is considered legitimate, and under what circumstances. (2/x)

It also seemed as if the show’s primary positioning of Prudence as an antagonist plays into a centuries-old myth developed by colonizers to dehumanize Black people for their traditional African spiritual beliefs and practices. The show positions Prudence as the angry Black woman who attacks the misunderstood, small, blonde, white girl. It’s a harmful conflict viewers simply did not need to see, especially when the cards are so clearly stacked in Sabrina’s favor. Prudence never stood a chance (3)

Representation is nice and all, but it should encourage writers to address characters of color like Prudence with dimension — including acknowledgements of how race affects the way they move through the world. Instead they totally ignored her race in some kind of colorblind haze, without acknowledging that even among women, power takes on a completely different meaning when blackness is a part of their identity. That to me is why CAOS is a bit of a failure. What do you think?—–

so, i’m definitely not going to dispute this. i mentioned in a few of my write ups for the show thus far that the treatment of race is never given any consideration the way sexuality and gender are cared for. 

i get this especially in the arc for roz, who essentially functions as a plot device rather than get the same kind of character development that harvey, susie, and sabrina get, for instance. 

as for prudence specifically, yes, the lynching scene has horrible optics and definitely perpetuates traumatic threats that were so unnecessary, in any case. it clearly wasn’t considered and i find it shocking (read: not too shocking) that no one, along the line, said hey, let’s not. you’d think that’d be obvious, but—it is RAS. he’s never been good at positive or equal racial representation, whatsoever, so let’s not beat around that bush.

beyond that, there are certain things that i feel i can’t speak to, but there’s a very good write up here, which i’ll post. 

Prudence is never depicted as an outright villain. The writers behind the series clearly want audiences to like her: She has bombastic entrances, great comebacks, and a stylistic fierceness that honors Gabrielle’s inspiration from the iconic Eartha Kitt. For every scene where she is cruel to Sabrina, there are others meant to highlight her depth beyond that mean-girl archetype, like their thoughtful argument about faith in the “Feast of Feasts” episode. Even as they have wildly different perspectives, they learn to respect each other. For Sabrina, she is willing to disregard the rules in order to get freedom and power; for Prudence, power is enough. In many ways, Prudence reminds me of Buffy the Vampire Slayer’s Cordelia Chase (portrayed with vigor and venom by Charisma Carpenter) — a mean girl who becomes a hero with dimension in her own right.

I will admit whenever Prudence referred to Sabrina as “half-breed” to nod to her half-witch, half-mortal lineage, I winced. Those words coming out of the mouth of a black woman — especially a character who is revealed to be the mixed-race daughter of Father Blackwood (Richard Coyle) — is like stepping into a home with fun house mirrors. It’s a jarring occurence repeated at different points in the series, and it seems born from the same well of ignorance that led to the most prickly moment in the series’ fourth episode, “Witch Academy.”

The most controversial scene in Chilling Adventures, at least in regards to Prudence, comes at the end of that episode, which charts Sabrina’s early days in the Academy of the Unseen Arts as she suffers through a cruel hazing experience known as the Harrowing. The Weird Sisters, with Prudence guiding the way, relish torturing Sabrina — imprisoning her in a narrow chamber, forcing her into the cold night where a demon taunts her by imitating her loved ones being grotesquely tortured — and save their cruelest punishment for last. They take Sabrina to a clearing in the dead of night. A noose festoons her neck, rope binds her wrists. But instead of being strung up and perhaps even killed, Sabrina flips the script: With the help of the ghosts of Academy students killed during their own Harrowings, she flings up the Weird Sisters on invisible nooses, strangling them as she declares there will be no more hazing at the school. In a recent io9 piece, Beth Elderkin and Charles Pulliam-Moore critiqued this scene succinctly: “This should not have to be explained, but it is in extremely bad taste to depict black people being hanged on television without an extraordinary amount of context and care that make it clear that (a) the creators of the television show understand the significance of that imagery, and (b) said hanging serves a narrative point.”

Lynching is not a horror transcribed to history, but a present and vicious act. The goal of those that perform these monstrosities throughout the sickening history of this country is more than just pain or violence, it is to consign black people to utter oblivion. As the marvelous journalist Ida B. Wells said to a Chicago crowd in 1900, “Our country’s national crime is lynching. It is not the creature of an hour, the sudden outburst of uncontrolled fury, or the unspeakable brutality of an insane mob. It represents the cool, calculating deliberation of intelligent people who openly avow that there is an ‘unwritten law’ that justifies them in putting human beings to death without complaint under oath, without trial by jury, without opportunity to make defense, and without right of appeal.”

I wasn’t riled by what happens in Chilling Adventures, but I can see how it betrays an ignorance to the optics of the matter, even as the hangings are meant to evoke the history of witch trials leading up to the emergence of the Greendale 13 in the closing episode. Yet to call what happens a lynching is to strip actual lynchings of their tangled complexities and to willfully ignore the context of the scene in the series. Sabrina doesn’t kill Prudence or the other Weird Sisters; she was defending herself in the only way she saw fit to avoid her own demise. (This act also foreshadows the darkness Sabrina is willing to enact by season’s end.) Most importantly, Chilling Adventures from the very beginning treats Prudence as an alluring mean girl, not a villain meant to be punished. If anything, Gabrielle brings her to life with such fierce grace, she becomes more than just a charming supporting character, but an accomplished scene-stealer who at times could be a more engaging anchor for the series than Shipka’s Sabrina.

[…]

Meanwhile, the history of black witches in pop culture is a tangled one defined by exoticization and marginalization. Black witches may be granted style and grace, but rarely are the written with any interiority. In The Craft, Rachel True’s Rochelle is mired in the racist attacks of a peer, but she is hastily drawn in comparison to the other, white members of her coven. In American Horror Story: Coven, Angela Bassett brings a fierce grace to Madame Marie Laveau, one of the most important figures of witchcraft in New Orleans and American history, but that series framed race in a way that betrays a queasy ignorance (and her power often paled to that of the white witches, who seemingly cribbed their skills from black women in the first place). Although Tituba is one of the most iconic black witches, thanks to portrayals in a variety of books, films, and series about the Salem witch trials, historical documents prove she wasn’t black at all but a South American Native. The most successful black witches in all of pop culture, to me, remain Mozelle Batiste Delacroix (Debbi Morgan) and the women of Eve’s Bayou, a gorgeous coming-of-age tale that respects and celebrates the rich culture of rural Louisiana.

Where does Prudence fit within this lineage? Does she mark a fascinating step forward in granting black women (and black audiences by proxy) the delight that comes with being a witch, or is she another example of the ways black witches in pop culture garner little respect and even less interiority by the writers that conjure them? Prudence is a tremendous character — beguiling, sharp-witted, fierce. She’s also something I wish I got to see as a kid: a black witch having fun with her powers and reveling in the world she lives in. If anything, she’s dynamic enough thanks to Gabrielle’s slinky performance that she trumps the show’s nagging issues of colorblind perspective. The creators behind Chilling Adventures would be smart to give her even more focus going forward and define the dynamics of race within their world of witchcraft.The conversation swirling around Chilling Adventures reflects the fascinating, wildly shifting intersections between politics and art that often simplify the former and flatten the latter. 

Representation need not be a mirror for individual members of the audience, but should encourage writers to address characters of color like Prudence with dimension — including acknowledgements of how race affects the way they move through the world. Chilling Adventures seeks to interrogate the ways women yearn for, experience, and at times, are prohibited from power through its clever, rich story about witches. But to give this story justice, the show must acknowledge that even among women, power takes on a completely different meaning when blackness is a part of their identity.

[x] (i think the whole article is really great and worth reading too)

so for me, yes, caos absolutely fails in many regards. it’s very whitefeminism!now! and that’s clear. 

but i do really agree with the last part of this article as well, which highlights that prudence is a very strong character in her own right and her relationship with sabrina very much shifts; before the show aired, i mentioned i was nervous that they made sabrina’s foil a black girl, but as it progressed, i didn’t really feel prudence was an antagonist. at the start, sure, but she feels very much a victim to the same world (for different reasons, obviously) and seemed to realize that towards the end. how she addresses her place in the witch world as a woman of color is something i hope the writers are paying attention to. i hope. 

witches are always going to be fairly fraught in terms of subject matter; caos invokes so much catholic vs satanism that it absolutely stomps all over any other religion, particularly iconography or stereotypes. i have plenty of criticisms in this regard, especially from my own place as a jewish woman. so many western witch stereotypes come from anti-semitism. the pointed hat was a medieval jewish hat and the physical depiction of witches also comes from very aggressive anti-semitic stereotypes, as well as the stories of blood libel (ie, child snatching and eating). it goes on. 

still to this day, most witches in films are portrayed by or described as jewish women. (elphaba, the witches in any oz incarnation, the coding of mother gothel in tangled etc) in caos specifically, they utilize lilith, who was a jewish figure, as the original demon and i could see that upsetting some in the context. it doesn’t for me, as a jewish woman, but i get it. 

and yet, i still enjoy the exploration of the witch, because i think it has the capacity to move or wade more deeply into these historical contexts, and also can be steeped with so much other meaning as well. witches have often been a gendered issue, the vilification of the woman, and how that spills onto the woman’s individual non-christian or non whiteness is a case by case basis. caos definitely, definitely fails in this. 

tl;dr, i do agree. i really do. and these are critiques that make the show worth not watching for some, worth openly pointing out. race is just as wrapped up in witch tales as much as religion or gender is, so to only address two out of those three things felt deliberately “colorblind” in a way that is not effective (and straight out offensive) for where we’re at in society. 

[holycow99]

石田お寿司 12/9/21 stream translation Part 3

This is not the full translation of the stream. I only translated the parts I could understand & interpret or parts I found interesting/important. I’m still a beginner in Japanese, so the translations may not be accurate. If you want to repost, please repost at your own risk.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(t/n: ** means translation may not be accurate.)

C: Did you become high after finishing the manuscript?

I: Nope. I was drinking soju just now.

C: I can’t resist ikemen.

I: Aren’t all ikemen super good-looking? This might be bias, but I think there are more beautiful women. They’re oozing with feminine beauty, like their skin texture. I think women are more beautiful, and they have high sense of beauty. Aren’t beautiful guys rare? That’s why, you’ll easily get attracted to these people.

C: I understand what you’re saying. Women are all sexy.

I: No, you don’t. I never said anything about women being sexy.

*Someone commented about them getting bored of looking at beautiful men & women after a while.

I: I don’t think so. I think a beauty will always be a beauty. Handsome guys will also always be handsome as long as they take care of their appearance.

C: I won’t get tired of looking at beauties, but I won’t even look at uglies.

I: What a harsh thing to say. You won’t even look at uglies? This might turn into a topic about appearance discrimination. Well, we are not born equal. Humans are living creatures that are greatly influenced by our genetics.

(t/n: The answer below may be offensive to some people. Please be aware that everyone holds their own beliefs, so please be respectful. Do not throw hates on Ishida Sui you disagree with him. Thank you.)

C: I want to fight against my genes.

I: Everyone’s the same. Aren’t we here living for that reason? Fighting against genes and death. We fight against our genes and traumas. We battle against death, though we’ll surely be defeated. Lately, I think women are enemies of men and vice versa. This happens during break up as well, but men and women are battling each other. By that I don’t mean just by clashing head-on. Being together and understanding each other are a battle itself, in my opinion. I just think that men and women are enemies. I don’t mean that we can’t understand each other. Men live to conquer women, after all. That’s why I think we’re battling against our opposite sex. People who wanna be popular are fighting too. The men wanna appeal towards women. Of course, there are battles among men themselves. For women, they’re dealing with all sorts of things, such as protecting themselves from men or put up with the absurdity of men. Men and women are different, so I think we can’t help but to fight against each other. It’s our destiny.

S******: The progression from Tagame Gengoroh’s topic to this topic is amazing.

I: That’s right. We started from talking about Tagame Gengoroh to talking about this. We diverted from talking about Tagame Gengoroh, and now we’re talking about how men and women are born to conquer each other. This applies to both non-masculine men and non-feminine women too. It’s about fighting against gender.  

C: I have a lover, but I don’t remember ever fallen in love. Is it strange?

I: It’s not strange at all. You might’ve been raised like that. It’ll be tougher for you if you keep on thinking about how strange or weird you are or that you need to fit in with your surroundings. I think it’s better if you can slowly accept yourself.

C: My ex-girlfriend had an arm fetish.

I: ‘My girlfriend had a breast fetish. What do you mean? Wait, it’s actually arm fetish! Hahaha! (t/n: Ishida misread the kanji for arm.) It sounds like I’m the one who has breast fetish.

C: How about a love counselling session with listeners for 30,000 subscribers’ commemoration?

I: That’s a good idea. It doesn’t have to be about love. I’ll answer questions from subscribers.

C: How about doing ‘100 questions to Ishida Sushi’?

I: I see.

MM: On the contrary, don’t you have questions for us?

I: Are you provoking me to?! I’ll pin this comment, since it’s funny. Let’s expose this comment. What the hell is wrong with you?! I don’t have one! Who cares?! Hahahaha. What a hilarious thing to say. I’m gonna expose you. I’ll let everyone see your comment until the next ridiculous comment appears.

I: When I was playing Ghosts n’ Goblins, there’s one person who sought my love advice. She’s dating with her childhood friend and they couldn’t converse properly through chat. I told her not to then.  Surprisingly, she’s really asking for advice. It’s actually a real problem. She probably had someone she could talk to. It didn’t have to be me. I found it funny how I answered that question as I liked.

*Someone suggested to him to ask the fans questions.

I: Did something good happen to you guys recently?

C: No.

C: I cut my hair.

I: That’s nice.

People in the comments: No good things happened.

I: Isn’t this bad?

C: I went to Disney Land.

*Ishida reading people’s answers.

(t/n: It sounded like he’s rapping.)

I: There’s too much to read. If you ask me questions, it’ll end with me answering them. If I ask you guys, I’ll receive a lot of responses.

*Continue reading answers.

I: Isn’t this good? It means you guys have good things happen to you. That’s all for my question.

C: Do you believe in fortune-telling?

I: The only things I believe in is Shiitake Uranai. (t/n: Shiitake Uranai is a fortune-telling by Vogue Girls.)

C: Have you become interested in us?

I: Well…

C: This stream won’t end until Ishida Sui sensei ask 100 questions to us.

I: I see. I can, but I’ll just ask the questions. I don’t have that many questions though.

C: Are you a virgin?

I: Yes.

C: Tell me to go to bed early.

I: Go and sleep.

C: Sensei will ask us questions half-heartedly, so it’ll end quick.

I: That’s right. I’ll only ask questions.

C: Why is Shiitake Uranai so accurate?

I: It’s designed to be applicable to anyone as much as possible. And people only look at the part which only applies to them. So, they think it’s accurate.

I: I totally understand how you guys feel. Everyone must be feeling anxious every day. You’re anxious every day, but if you can find a small happiness in it. And then, everyone, for example, usually likes to hang out and having fun with their friends, but there are times where you wanna be alone. Aren’t you this type of people? Then, you also have dreams you’ve been thinking about for so long, but you can’t tell anyone about it, and you’re not confident whether you’re capable of realising them. You have these kind of worries, but you still pursue them because you think there might be something special out of it.** Aren’t you guys like that? Did I hit the bull’s eye?

(t/n:**This line may not be accurate.)

C: Just like you said.

I: Right? That’s why, people are convinced the fortune-telling is accurate because it predicts things that can be applied to anyone.

C: You’re wrong.

I: What a strong statement.

C: Are there people who aren’t like that?

I: It’s okay if what I said doesn’t apply to you. In conclusion, fortune-tellers are people who are able to skilfully put together all these ideas.

C: You completely missed the mark.

I: Really? Then, you must be gloomy even when you hang out with people, you don’t even have a dream.

C: I didn’t listen to it all.

I: Go away! Hahaha. Go listen again.

C: Before you started streaming, I thought you had a very strict personality.

I: How should I put it? I think I do have a strict side, but don’t act as if you know me. Hehe. If we talk alone, then you’re probably right. Let’s have a conversation together one day.

C: Have you written a one-shot before debuting?

I: I probably had. The TG one I suppose.

C: A question for foreigners.

I: Do I have one? What’s your favourite colour?

C: I’m thinking of sending letters to you.

I: Send it. I’ll read.

C: I like Chimpanzee. (t/n: This comment’s in eng.)

I: I never asked about that.

*Someone commented about fan letter.

I: I do receive and read them. I read all the letters.

C: Have you watched Demon Slayer?

I: I read until the 7th volume.

C: Are the letters we sent go to Shueisha?

I: Yeah. To Shueisha, then they’ll send them to my house if you submit it to Young Jump.

C: Why you don’t say anything about TG manga or anime?

I: I have my own reasons.

C: Do you play social-networking games?

I: Nope.

I: Can’t we just have an idle talk? (t/n: He probably said this because there were questions he’s uncomfortable with.) Maybe we’ll stop here. We’ve been chatting for an hour and a half.

*Someone commented about fan letters.

I: If you submit your letter to Shueisha’s Young Jump, it may get delivered.

*Someone commented about Dandadan.

I: I read the first chapter only. I thought It was good.

*Someone commented about the time Ishida fought against his fans in Smash Bros and got beaten up.

I: That was a shock.

Part 4

[aros001]

Read through light novel vol. 5. Random thoughts.

Yeah, I can see why this volume was adapted into a movie. How good of an adaptation the movie is, I have no idea because I haven't seen it yet.

A crude pelt. For a weapon, a hatchet it must have stolen from somewhere. Its color was good; it showed no sign of starving.

I love this little detail. It's follows an obvious logic but it's not anything most people would even think of. Yeah, of course Goblin Slayer would pay attention to a goblin's color. How well-fed a goblin is hints at how strong the nest as a whole is likely to be and how well they've been able to gather food for themselves.

“Yes. And we don’t have much time to search.” Goblin Slayer jogged up to an intersection, then moved close to Priestess as if asking her to watch his back. To be suddenly so close to him—her heart began to race, even though she knew this was entirely platonic.

Yeah, that went in one ear and other the other for the shipper side of me. It's only a half-serious ship, since there's the age difference between the two and Cow Girl is more likely to be the endgame (if there even is one), but it's easy to get wrapped up in the two since they're the ones I've seen the more interaction, attachment, and development between. I like Cow Girl a lot and her relationship with Goblin Slayer but she is usually up at the farm away from everything that's happening, so I don't have as solid a picture of their relationship as I do with him and Priestess.

It's pretty clever writing that the goblins learned how to make an arrow that deliberately breaks apart after Goblin Slayer did it to only one them even once. Despite all his warnings about the dangers of leaving even a single goblin alive after a battle because of how they'll grow and learn from it, it only feels like he made a mistake and not a stupid one. His logic of spreading rot was sound, especially with the limited time table the party had, and throughout the series he's been experimenting with different methods of killing and combat. But they still learned from him because he let one get away. Even he had unintentionally underestimated the goblins. Even Goblin Slayer is not infallible when it comes to goblins. A nice little added detail though that, just because the goblins found out how to create more of the arrows, it doesn't mean they know how to use them effectively, shooting them improperly while they're not even that strong to begin with and basically making all their arrows like that, hindering them in situations where regular arrows would be more effective.

Symbol of the Green Moon, God of Wisdom, and a goblin paladin. I love mythology in stories. Funny enough, because they can't speak in a way that can typically be understood, this group of goblins might have been scarier than Dark Elf, because unlike him we don't know what they were up to. We just have theories at the book's end from Goblin Slayer. The uncertainty makes you worry that the party missed something big and that it's going to come back to haunt them.

“How could I know?” Goblin Slayer said, sounding a bit annoyed. He could be curt, and abrupt, and cold. But he almost never shouted. “What should I have said to her? ‘I’m sorry your friends are dead, but at least you survived’?”

This took the wind out of High Elf Archer’s sails. “Well... Well...” She opened her mouth, then closed it again, before finally saying, “There’s such a thing as the sensitive way to say things.”

Goblin Slayer’s reply was brief: “It doesn’t change what they mean.”

Come to think of it...

Priestess bit her lip gently. He had not tried to comfort her in her own case, either. Nor when they had rescued the injured elf adventurer from the ruins. He was always just...

The faint taste of blood was so bitter it almost brought tears to her eyes.

I'd made a comment in my last post about his words to Spearwoman, how his words about her spear were him trying to comfort her in his own way, and I still feel that way with Noble Fencer. Obviously I don't like that she was raped and her party killed by the goblins but it was nice that we have a character fighting the goblins with the party whom actually did suffer through the common fate of those who lose to them. It almost happened to Priestess and High Elf Archer and Goblin Slayer was forced to watch what they did to his sister and his village, but like with Sword Maiden, all that is still different from actually suffering through what the goblins do to people. This series isn't mature because it has rape and trauma in it but rather because it takes rape and trauma seriously. We saw one end of the spectrum with Sword Maiden, her trauma making her unable to fight the goblins, and now we get the other with Noble Fencer, her trauma making it so that she needs to fight the goblins because it's all she can hold onto right now. Even a nice little parallel between her and Spearwoman focusing so much on their stolen weapons; it's not so much the weapon itself as it is the one tangible thing they can get back out of everything else the goblins have taken from them.

And yeah, Goblin Slayer doesn't comfort in the traditional sense. He offers just the one thing that helps him keep going after his own trauma. With Priestess and Noble Fencer, he allowed them to come with him and help him kill the goblins that made them suffer, and even the elf adventurer he assured her he would kill all the goblins who'd held her captive. It's not probably the most healthy of comfort but its the one tool he has to work with because even he doesn't have the answer for how to recover, just how to move forward. I'm hoping this isn't the last we see of Noble Fencer.

“I will get back your sword.”

“And I will kill that goblin paladin. Along with the other goblins.”

“I don’t mean one or two of them. I don’t mean an entire nest. I don’t mean even this entire

fortress.”

“I will slay all the goblins.”

So do not cry.

That's going right up there with "Even in my dreams?" "Yes." as one of my favorite lines of the series.

One of my favorite recurring gags in this series is the escalating and extreme ways Goblin Slayer finds around High Elf Archer's rules. No fire, no water, no poison...so he uses an explosion. And when explosions are forbidden, he uses a freaking avalanche. He didn't even cheat to set it off, as Noble Fencer used lightning (though it might be a little technical cheat with snow basically being water).

And again, nothing this series sets up goes to waste. The breathing rings were established last volume and they come back into play continuously here. It's good writing and never feels like a contrivance or a Deus ex Machina.

All thought and jokes about ships and romance aside, Priestess continues to be one of my favorite characters in this series next to Goblin Slayer himself, in no small part because their interactions are my favorites out of all the cast. They're just opposite enough to complement each other perfectly and their relationship quietly grows stronger as time goes on. There's a lot of trust and respect between the two and it runs both ways, surprising and delighting even Priestess how much faith he has in her.

Someone in my vol. 3 post commented on how we can see how much better an adventurer Priestess becomes as time goes on and I agree. It's now been a full year since she started adventuring with Goblin Slayer and it shows a lot here, having more confidence and wisdom in her abilities thanks to her experiences. She's more openly compassionate than Goblin Slayer, but I like how she completely understands Noble Fencer's desire/need to keep fighting the goblins, because it was exactly the same for her.

I just gone done with the Rising of the Shield Hero light novels before starting this series (the ones available in english, anyway) so that's probably why I'm thinking about this but I'm hoping Goblin Slayer and Priestess continue to develop in a manner similar to Naofumi and Raphtalia. In the beginning, Raphtalia is easily Naofumi's subordinate or sidekick, but as time goes on and both characters continue to grow she very much becomes his partner, standing with him as an equal as they always have each others backs. Obviously Goblin Slayer and Priestess will never be complete equals in terms of positions or abilities. Goblin Slayer can't use Miracles and Priestess isn't a warrior. But I am hoping that as the series goes along Priestess does feel more and more like his partner. Not someone he needs to look after but someone fighting beside him on equal footing. We've already been seeing some of that here and in the battle against Dark Elf with the unspoken understandings over plans and trust to have the other's back. But she is still young and still learning. Still a few steps behind Goblin Slayer, but she's making an effort to keep pace.

Original Reddit post: https://www.reddit.com/r/GoblinSlayer/comments/fwbsvt/read_through_light_novel_vol_5_random_thoughts/

[animesshadow]

Did I create a monster?

It was late at night already. Erza was enjoying a book while comfortably sitting on a couch in her apartment in Fairy Hills. Every now and then the sound of thunder could be heard from outside. There was obviously quite the storm outside. Lightning could be seen flashing frequently from the window behind her. She was so absorbed by the content of the novel that it took her a few moments to realize that someone was knocking on the window behind her.

Eventually, she snapped out of her book and shifted her attention towards the window. She looked outside to see who it was that came knocking on her window at this late hour.

Through the rain, there was a small hooded figure standing on the branch of a tree that was close enough for a person to reach Erza’s apartment. It didn’t take her long to figure out who it was. The boys signature white scarf gave it away immediately.

Erza opened the window in surprise.

“Natsu? What the hell are you doing here?”

“Can we talk?... It’s important”

The small Natsu said a little nervous. 

Erza knew well that no boy was allowed in these dorms but she realized that it must have been something very important for him to seek her assistance at this hour. It must have been something that couldn’t wait

“Alright, get in.”

Erza said with a sigh and gestured him to climb through the window. Erza stepped aside and Natsu effortlessly climbed through the window.

Natsu was still a child. A child that Master brought to Fairy Tail a few years ago. Apparently, he was a so-called dragon slayer and the dragon Igneel who was a father figure to him went missing. He was completely on his own from that point so Master took him in hopes to give Natsu a place to stay and people he could see as family.

Master Makarov told Erza to keep an eye out for the boy. She was the most disciplined and reliable S-Rank mage in Fairy Tail so she was the perfect person to look after someone with such a strange magic. Natsu was typically a shy boy and didn’t talk out much to other people but over time Natsu seemed to grow kinda attached to Erza. He thought of Erza as something like an elder sister to him. She was basically the only person he can open up to in the entire guild.

“So, what’s wrong?”

Erza asked the troubled Natsu in front of her. She was worried because Natsu seemed to avert her gaze for some reason.

“Oh.. yes.. umm...”

Natsu fidgeted around before hesitantly pulled something that he hid in his wide raincoat. 

It was a bloody knife.

Erza’s eyes widened in surprise. She knew exactly what this meant. You see, Natsu had a few... problems. 

Before Master Makarov took Natsu in a few scientists found him by himself. They were fascinated by the human child that had the magic of a dragon inside of him. Apparently they did experiments on him to make a human-dragon hybrid weapon out of him. Even though Natsu was able to flee, these experiments didn’t leave Natsu unscathed. He developed some kind of bloodlust that always clouded his mind.

After Erza found out about this she tried everything she could to suppress these twisted emotions. However, none of her actions seemed to help. Recently Erza secretly let Natsu help out a butcher in his slaughterhouse. There Natsu could vent his bloodlust by killing animals that would have been slaughtered for meat anyway.

At first, this seemed to help. Killing animals helped Natsu reduce his bloodlust so much that it didn’t affect his mind. Natsu’s sadistic desire to torture and end lives was not something to take lightly. Erza watched Natsu at the slaughterhouse a couple of times. The sadistic joy on his face as his took an animal life with his own hands was outright horrific. Even with Erza’s experience the sight of a child that only seemed to feel alive by joyfully killing others made her turn pale in anxiety.

“... What happened?”

Erza asked. She still hoped that her worst fears didn’t get real and this was just misunderstanding. Deep down she could already feel that that wasn’t the case.

“It happened Erza-neechan... I... I killed someone...”

Natsu softly replied with his head hung low. He knew he did something terrible. That’s what everyone else would say at least.

“I see..”

So it finally happened. Even after everything they tried Erza knew that it only a matter of time until Natsu crossed the line.

“Tell me what happened. Every detail”

Erza looked sternly at Natsu expecting to hear the full story.

“I went to the graveyard again because it’s the only place I can fully relax... There was a man. He forcefully dragged a woman with him to a dark corner. The woman tried to scream and resist but the man was too strong and overpowered her easily... I went after them to see what happens. The man made a disgusting face... he took out a knife and threatened to slice the lady’s throat open if she continued to resist. He ripped off her close and started touching her while the woman could do nothing but cry in agony... There I felt it. This person was scum... So I took out the knife I took from the butcher-san. I crawled out of my hiding spot, ran up to him and sliced his carotid artery open before he could react. He would have bled out in a few seconds but I forcefully stabbed him in the chest multiple times until he finally stopped moving... Everything happened so fast. My mind went completely blank and everything I felt was the desire to end his life...”

Natsu explained what happened in every detail. That explained why Natsu’s coat was soaked in blood even though it was raining heavily outside. 

Erza listened to the story in silence. She noticed how Natsu’s eyes lit up as he relived the memory of his first kill. There was no hint of regret on Natsu’s face. Erza could fully imagine the wicked smile on his face as he overpowered a full grown adult and stabbed the life out of him. For him, it was probably the best moment in recent years. A moment he finally felt alive again.

“What happened with the woman? Did she see your face?”

At this point, Erza knew that talking about the morale of his actions was pointless now. Natsu has tasted human blood and he loved it. The euphoria he felt in the moment of his first kill was something that could never be achieved by killing animals anymore. Natsu was still a child. A child Erza promised to protect so she had to make sure the woman didn’t identify Natsu as the killer.

“She was in shock but after a few moments she snapped out of it and hugged me real tight. She repeatedly said ‘thank you, thank you’ for a while... Her trauma didn’t seem to allow her to fully grasp what happened there.”

Natsu said in a monotone voice. He didn’t seem to care about that woman at all. Of course, he didn’t. It no act of justice, vigilance or anything like that. Natsu didn’t step in to save the woman, he just wanted to kill someone.

“Did you... Did you kill her too?”

Erza was not so sure anymore if Natsu was able to tell the difference in those two people at that moment. She hoped that the criminal was the only one that died by Natsu’s hand tonight.

“No, of course I didn’t! That would have been wrong, wouldn’t it?... I told her to please not to tell anyone about what happened... She agreed and went home after she wiped her tears and put her clothes back on.”

Erza was a bit relieved. So Natsu did seem to have a small sense of morality left. Of course, she couldn’t be sure if it was just his bloodlust that was satisfied with one kill or if he really held back because the woman was a victim in the first place. But after seeing the face of the small boy she promised to take care of, she couldn’t help but believe him. 

“Let’s hope she really keeps her promise..”

Erza had no option but to trust the words of this random woman. Even though she knew it was wrong, she did not want to lose Natsu. For some people, this small kid may have been a monster. A monster that put on a human act to fool those around him as he felt no real emotions anymore. Something that has to be locked up or even killed but during the time she spent with that boy she couldn’t help but grow attached to him. She did not want to lose him!

“Listen Natsu. We both know that you won’t be able to stop killing at this point.”

Natsu was a bit embarrassed at the disappointment in Erza’s voice. He tried to look away to avert his gaze from her worried face. He may not feel any real emotions but for some reason, he always felt uncomfortable when he realized Erza was sad.

“I now fully realize that there is nothing I can do to erase your bloodlust. If it goes on uncontrolled like that you will one day be captured and imprisoned or executed... To be honest, I don’t want that to happen. After everything you’ve been through in the past, I know that it is not completely your fault that you are like this. You are a member of Fairy Tail now, a part of our family. You are important to me and I don’t want to see go on a mindless rampage.”

The worry and anxiety in Erza’s voice made Natsu feel even more uncomfortable. Nothing he did made him feel even remotely like that. He always put on a facade and acted like he cared about the things other people told him about. He put on a smile and acted like a regular child in the guild but honestly.. he didn’t care at all. So why did he feel this annoying feeling when Erza is worried like that?

“I can’t believe I am saying this but...” Erza mumbled to herself. “I know that it is impossible to fully suppress that ‘emotion’ completely. So we have to vent it in a controlled way.”

Natsu was surprised, to say the least. Is the righteous Erza-neechan in front of him really suggesting what he thinks it is?

“You will not, under no circumstances, kill an innocent person!”

“You mean...”

“As much as I hate to admit it, there are criminals out there that the law alone can not punish. People that are beyond saving. People who did, or still do, gruesome and horrible things...”

Memories of her past flashed back in her mind. Erza hated to remember these events so she shook her head to get rid of them immediately.

“If you ever want to kill someone again, it will be one of those criminals. Fairy Tail is one of the strongest guilds in Fiore so we regularly get information on dangerous criminals and dark guilds in Fiore.”

“Are you telling me, I can...?”

“I am not saying that you can go and kill those people as you see fit! Only when it gets impossible to suppress those emotions again I will consider pointing you to the right way.”

Natsu couldn’t believe it. Sure, it was shocking that Erza was pushed far enough to even consider something like this but for the most part, he felt happy. Maybe, just maybe, there will be a time when they can kill those criminals together. Those thoughts made Natsu almost jump up in anticipation. In his own twisted mind, he considered killing together the most intimate two people can get. 

“But beware! You will always have to make sure no one will be able to trace you back after ‘that’... I will have to teach you how to get rid of all the evidence.”

Erza hated herself for going that far. She was basically helping a murderer. But she couldn’t help herself, her disgust was overshadowed by the wish to protect this cute little boy. She didn’t know herself what it was that made her feel so attached to Natsu. She just didn’t want a child that had a terrible past to destroy himself by having no one to help him.

“Now, did you understand that?”

“Yes, I did!”

Natsu shouted out in confirmation while making an exaggerated nod.

Erza made a sigh of relief. She still felt troubled over what they discussed just now but she couldn’t bring herself to imprison that small child. She loved him too much to do that. 

“It is a promise, okay? I trust you that will not break that promise. From now on if it gets too much for you to handle, you will only kill those that can not be redeemed in any other way.”

After that, Erza set a strict set of guidelines to help Natsu channel his need to kill so that he can satisfy his ‘needs’ and, in some sense, do some good. Natsu would always make sure to remember these guidelines as the Code of Erza.

‘Did I create a monster?’ Erza finally thought to herself. She knew that it would not always be easy to live with Natsu’s actions but she had no other choice but to help him. She didn’t want to lose Natsu. ‘Or did I point it towards the right direction?’

[stargazer1682]

Another Life - Buffy “Who Are You?” alternate ending

We know how it happened originally, and much of it is still the same; Riley said, “We think there’s three of them,” and Faith went in.  The first two get taken care of, she gets cornered by the third, when Buffy, in Faith’s body, shows up.  She takes him out and they fight.

Faith throws a punch, Buffy blocks it.  Buffy throws a kick, Faith ducks; although not enough, and Buffy, or rather Faith’s heel catches the back of Faith’s, or rather Buffy’s head throwing her back. Faith reacts, using her momentum to turn her fall into a handspring, landing on her feet. It’s different though. She’s noticed it before, the things she’s done, her movements; ever since the switch there’s a strange dizziness about the world.  Not enough to throw her off balance, exactly; maybe if she was an ordinary person it would have messed with her more.  It took some thought to realize what was off was that everything was different, that this wasn’t her body.  This body didn’t have the occasional twinge in her right shoulder; a souvenir from her misspent youth, when she tore a muscle following a spectacular dive off a cliff into a swimming pond.  She may have been fearless, but she wasn’t the Slayer yet, which meant she only had regular healing abilities then; and because she didn’t dare tell her Watcher that she was hurt, she never let up on Faith’s training and it never quite healed right.  

This body, however, didn’t have that problem; it was flawless so far as Faith could tell; save possible snoring that woke her up twice during the night, but she wasn’t sure that hadn’t been Riley.  This body moved differently.  Many of the moves, the kicks, the blows, came easily enough, but sometimes the coordination was a little off.  Like the uppercut Buffy just threw, which Faith barely avoided.  “I should have seen that coming a mile away,” she thinks. She’s not going down this easy; she’s not giving up this body, this chance to start over.

Then Faith remembers, “Fifth grade street hockey.”  Best damn goalie there ever was, never once let the puck through; even if it mean taking a stick to the knee swung at full strength by a seventh grader twice her size.  Fractured shin bone, but her record was secure.  And she may have broken the guy’s nose in a fight afterwards.  That injury was a lot harder to hide from her Watcher, and she actually got the medical attention it needed and it did heal, but…

A quick faint to the left, jab, block, duck – bam – a sharp stomp to the knee; Buffy goes down.

Then immediately Faith’s head snaps back, a flash or light and burst of pain rips across her face, as the blow sends her reeling back, crashing into a pew hard.

“How the hell did B manage to get a punch in?”  

Her vision clears and Faith looks up and sees it wasn’t Buffy that threw a punch, but a big, ugly…. What the hell is this thing?  Part man, part demon. And is that a floppy drive in his chest?

Doesn’t matter.  Faith gets to her feet and starts throwing punches, kicks, everything she’s got.  He matches her, blocking each blow, getting in a few of his own.  One blow, much like the first, sends her flying, landing on the floor with a thud.  As she stands, she sees Buffy, in her body, charging at this…. This thing.  She lands a blow from behind, followed quickly by another, but Adam grabs her with one hand, picking her up, and throwing her towards altar.  She hits it hard and slumps over.  

Faith gets to her feet and, letting out a scream, charges the monster and throws one punch after another, but to no affect.  The…thing seems more puzzled than anything, possibly amused.  He grabs her by the wrist and looks at her like he’s looking through her.

“You’re different. That’s interesting.”

And just like that Adam tosses her like a toy he’s no longer interested in, and Faith can only muster the strength to look up at him as he casually strolls out of the church.

It take a moment for her head to stop ringing.  Faith stands and looks around; the people escaped, they’re safe, but the church is partially in ruins.  She sees Buffy still slumped at the altar and rushes over.

“Are we finishing this?” she asks, but gets no response. “Come on now, don’t pass out on me, just because a demon cyborg came in and ruined the party.  Answer me!” she yells, shaking her own body, which is unresponsive. She cups her own face between her hands, “FAITH!”

Nothing.  She pulls her hands away and immediately recoils at the sight of blood.  

“No, not again.  Not again.”  There’s blood on her hands again.  Human blood.  Her blood.

A small, green, glowing stone roles out from the hand of Buffy/Faith and lands on the ground.  Its light pulses for a moment, then grows dimmer, until the light vanishes completely.

Time seems to stand still as Faith stares aimlessly at her own lifeless body.  She doesn’t even hear Riley and his team move in, bursting through the door and barking orders to sweep the perimeter.  

It wasn’t so much a conscious thought to leave as it was an instinct to move, to not be here that caused Faith to stand and walk out of the church; and keep walking for what felt like days, but in fact were merely hours.  The sun had set and somehow she found herself in the least likely of places, the front door of Giles’ home.  Her hand hesitated at the knob.  She had been about to just walk in, casually say “Hello,” but then what?  What would she say after that?  What could possibly happen next?

Faith turned to leave and barely took three steps when she heard the door open.  She turned back to find Giles standing in the door way, looking at her with… was that concern in his eyes?

It was the same way her Watch her looked at her after she came home from the hockey game.  She’d thought she’d be mad for getting into a fight, for getting hurt, but she wanted to make sure she was okay.  But she was gone.  They took her from her and the only person she could depend on since was herself.  The only thing that would protect her in this world were her own two hands.  But she saw them again, for the first time since it happened; and they weren’t her hands. They didn’t belong to her, they were someone else’s; and the only thing that was hers was the blood that still stained her fingers.

Giles spoke a single world and that was all that it took, “Faith?” he asked; and just like that it was like she was 10 years old again, crumpling to the ground.  Giles caught her, as he knelt beside her.  Faith couldn’t hold back anymore, the tears, the conflicting sorrow, and the guilt.  She barely managed to say the words, “I’m not…

“I know,” Giles responded.

“Buffy… she’s…”

“We know,” he replied, with a fair amount of difficulty as his own voice wavered.  “Riley told us.”

“I didn’t….”

“I know.  We know everything.”

Moments later, inside Giles house, Giles laid a blanket over Buffy’s shivering body.  Faith hadn’t said a word for nearly 20 minutes; she barely seemed to acknowledge the rest of them were there.

“What do we do?” Willow asks.

“We switch them back,” Riley said, matter of fact.

“I… I don’t know if we can,” said Willow.

“Why not?” asked Riley.

“I’m with soldier boy,” Xander chimes in.  

“But wouldn’t that kill Faith?” replied Willow.

“As opposed to Buffy being dead?” Xander sniped, “Show of hands who’s okay with that trade off.”

Xander and Riley both raised their hands, as Willow turned to Giles for guidance, but his immediate response, as he often did when he needed to gather his thoughts, was to clean his glasses.

“Xander,” Giles began, “it’s not that simple.”

“Seems awfully simple to me,” Riley retorted.  “Faith’s body is already dead, and from where I’m standing who, or whatever is inside Buffy deserves to join it.  Not Buffy.”

Tara spoke up.  “B-b-but…. It’s not just a matter of r-r-replacing one soul with another now. Buffy’s soul is somewhere else.”

“So?  Big deal!” Xander shouted.

“Xander!” Cried Willow.

“What?  You put Angel’s soul back in his body.  Why can’t you do the same?  Let’s go grab one of those orb deals and make with the Latin.”

“It wouldn’t be anything like that!” Willow exclaimed, before breaking down in tears.  “Don’t you think I would do it in a heart beat if I thought I could?  Don’t you think if it was that easy, I’d have done it already?”

“Willow…” Xander wrapped his arms around her as he fought back tears of his own. “I just don’t understand….  Why is this different?”

“Because h-her…” Tara started, “her soul, it could b-be….”

“It could be anywhere.” Giles added.  “A vampire is a damned being; their soul, or at least the part of it they don’t retain when they’re turned cannot crossover to any of the heavenly dimensions.   It’s been theorized by some that the soul of one turned into a vampire is sent to a hell dimension once a vampire is killed here on Earth.  But until that time it remains stuck somewhere in between planes, in a place called the ether.  Buffy’s soul would not be stuck in a place easily accessible by simple magics; and there would be much more to that soul than what was restored to Angel.  Angel still had all his memories intact, his consciousness, his very sense of being was and always has been in his body; whereas everything that is Buffy is…..” Giles caught himself for a moment as he found the strength to say the words.

“Gone.” Riley said, completing the train of thought.  “She’s really, truly gone.”

With a gasp of air, Giles replied, “Yes.  And there’s no telling where her…. Where she might be now.  It would take very powerful and very dark magic to pull her from wherever she is; and… if she came back… the trauma would be…. Well, I shudder to think.”

“Which brings us back to the original question,” Xander said calmly.  “What do we do?  What do we do about her?”

“I mean… It wasn’t her fault,” replied Willow. “It was Adam who… who… right?”

“Yeah.” Riley answered. “We got a basic picture of what was going down through infrared before we came in; and some of my men reported seeing Adam leaving, but they failed to engage him.  Based on the wreckage, Buffy and Faith, or rather Faith and… well, the two of them put up a hell of a fight when Adam showed up.  Buffy… er, Faith looked pretty worse for wear; and Buffy….”

“I don’t care who finished it,” said Xander, “She started it.  If it wasn’t for Faith, if she hadn’t caused all of this to start with, Buffy wouldn’t be…”

“He’s right.”

The voice that broke the silence took them all by surprise, partly because the person speaking hadn’t spoken in almost a half hour; and because it had the uncanny tone of someone they were trying to grieve.

“You should kill me,” Faith said.  “You need to kill me.  It’s the only way.”

The other four stared at the eerie form of their friend, whom they knew wasn’t their friend, for what seemed like an eternity; while Tara, uncomfortable with the silence, did her best to shy away, though Willow didn’t allow her to go far, as she seemed to draw comfort from her mere proximity.  They were all at a loss for words, Xander especially.  What seemed like a nice idea in a karmic retribution sort of way a moment ago, now felt like the distinct sensation of something wholly unpleasant stuck at the back of his throat once the person they were talking about decided to chime in and agree with him.  How do you respond to that?

Finally the silence was broken.

“No one’s killing anyone,” Giles stated rather convincingly, in his authoritative way.  “B… Faith.  You have a great deal to answer for.  And there will be a reckoning, of that much I can assure you.  But there’s been enough death at this moment, and I for one am not prepared for any additional blood spilled this evening, or for the foreseeable future.”

“Then I’ll turn myself in. That’s the next best step, right? Serve my time?”

“Under normal circumstance I might say, yes. But these are hardly normal circumstances.  I won’t have you tarnishing Buffy’s reputation or legacy by having her branded a… a….”

“Murderer. Right.  So like the boy asked, what do we do?”

Silence again pervaded the group as they were lost in thought, once again pondering that very question.

“The Council?” asked Willow.

“Not, I think, to be trusted,” replied Giles. “Nor, I should say, the Initiative; no offense.”

“I get it,” replied Riley.

“House arrest,” added Xander.

“It has merit,” Giles said approvingly, “but whose house?  The dorms? With all those people?”

“Not with Joyce,” Faith said, ruefully.

“Joyce.” Giles said with a deep sigh of regret.  He’d forgotten about Joyce.  They all had.

“God,” started Willow.  “How do we tell her…”

“We don’t,” Giles stated, as a matter of fact.  

“You can’t be serious,” said Xander.

“I am.”

“Her daughter is dead!”

“And do you want to be the one to tell her that?”

“But is it better we lie to her?” asked Willow.

“Yes,” came the voice of Buffy.  Faith continued, “I can do it.  I can convince her I’m… I’m her. She doesn’t deserve…”

“She doesn’t deserve what you set in motion with all of this.  And what about the rest of us?  We’re just supposed to smile and play along?  And for how long?  Years? Decades?  Are you going to pretend to still be dating Riley to keep up the charade?”

“That’s enough Xander,” Giles exclaimed.

“Look at it this way,” started Faith, “I’m still a Slayer.  That means odds are, you won’t have to put up with me for more than, what? Another year? Three if I’m really lucky. Do whatever you have to do.  Lock me up, beat me, whatever.  Just let me know when it’s over.”

A long night of debate and careful planning followed, but an agreement was reached among the group. Faith kept up appearances as Buffy. Joyce never learned the truth.  If she suspected, and she may have, because she knew her daughter, she never let one.  Maybe it was the return of that superhuman ability to rationalize the things she didn’t want to know, that she had been so good at before learning Buffy was the Slayer; allowing her to hold on to the belief that her daughter was safe and sound, right up until end.

As for Faith, for the first time in her life she knew what it was like to have someone who cared for her, more than a Watcher, but a real, actual mother who doted on her, showed her love.  Even if it was all a lie, it was a beautiful lie, and it didn’t dull the pain of the loss when Joyce died.

It even opened her to the possibility of letting others in, like Dawn; who, if Faith didn’t know better, she might have suspected was Buffy reincarnate.  She would do anything to protect Dawn; and she did.  When the chips were down and everything that mattered to her in the world was on the line, she took a leap of faith and sacrificed everything to save the world.

[sulietsexual]

You did a similar thing with Charmed, so what would you say is the most traumatic thing each of the scoobies went through? (Within btvs universe)

Okay, so I’mjust going to go with the Core Four Scoobies (Buffy, Giles, Willow and Xander)otherwise we’ll be here forever, given the rotation of characters on Buffy. So,here we go.

Buffy

So, for me,Buffy’s biggest trauma is somewhat complicated, because what I believe to her biggest trauma and whatthe show presents as her biggesttrauma are completely different. So I’m going to list both, and explain myreasoning behind both.

Narrativelyand within the context of the show and the character and the way the seriestook her characterisation, I would list Buffy’s resurrection as her biggesttrauma. While Buffy undergoes numerous traumas over the series and we have seenher previously suffer PTSD in the Season 2 opener When She Was Bad, herresurrection at the beginning of Season 6 seems to have traumatised her onseveral deeper levels, and it  takes hernearly the entire season to recover from the after-effects.

Not only isBuffy’s trauma linked to being violently pulled out of Heaven, she is furthertraumatised by the fact that she is resurrected in her own grave, effectivelyexperiencing what it is like to be buried alive which, thanks to the Season 1episode Nightmares, we know is one of Buffy’s biggest fears. The entireexperience, coupled with the depression she was already suffering from Season 5, combines to cause so much trauma to Buffy that she literally shuts down andcloses off from human emotions in order to cope.

That beingsaid, I personally believe that thebiggest trauma Buffy suffers is the abuse Spike puts her through. She spends allof Season 6 being victimised by Spike, emotionally and sexually. What we watchunfold over Season 6 is a classic example of an abusive relationship, and whileBuffy is trained/used to dealing with supernatural threats and living inconstant danger, she is not used to apartner who emotionally manipulates and abuses her, pushes her sexualboundaries, sexually assaults her and then attempts to rape her. Buffy might bethe Slayer but she is also human, and abusive relationships have devastating effects on the victims,often leaving them with trauma and PTSD for years afterwards.

Of coursethe show completely ignores this in favour of having Buffy prop up, coddle andcomfort her abuser, and so the trauma and PTSD she would definitely have suffered as a result of the relationship is neitheracknowledged or explored.

Giles

I would saythat Giles’ biggest trauma was losing Jenny and being the one to find her body,especially considering the manner in which he found her body.

As aWatcher, Giles is somewhat used to death and he mentions that he has lostpeople before, but Jenny seems to be the first death of someone truly close tohim, someone he loved. And while he does lose Buffy down the track, as aWatcher, he was always prepared for the day when he would lose his Slayer.Jenny’s death, however, came completely out of the blue and just as he was acknowledging hisfeelings for her again and moving towards a reconciliation, so the trauma andpain of her death cuts through him sharper and deeper than any other loss he’shad, up till that point and after.

As I pointedout, there’s also the way in whichGiles discovered Jenny’s body, which would definitely have added to his overalltrauma, as Angelus set everything up to provide maximum horror and trauma, withthe implied romantic evening, candles, roses, all leading to Giles findingJenny’s corpse in his bed, her eyes wide and dead and seemingly looking at him,a final message that he couldn’t save her. Giles’ breakdown after her death andthe way in which he recklessly goes after Angelus really shows how deep thetrauma went, as Giles is usually quite adept at keeping his emotions in check.The visceral reaction to Jenny’s death has me convinced that it was and remainsGiles’ greatest trauma.

Willow

I think theentire fandom can agree that Willow’s greatest trauma was Tara’s violent andabrupt death. As with Giles, losing a partner in such an unexpected andgruesome manner severely impacts Willow, and her subsequent rage and griefdrive her magical roaring rampage of revenge.

It’s nothard to pin down why this death traumatised Willow so much, as we know frompast experience that Willow does not handle grief or people leaving her well.When Oz cheated on her, her reaction was to cast a vengeance spell, and when heleft for good, her grief caused her to spiral so badly that she lost control ofher magic and power and put her friends in danger. So it’s no wonder thatlosing Tara in such a violent way – and actually having Tara die in her arms –had such a deep and traumatic effect on her, and given Willow’s previouscharacterisation and unhealthy coping mechanisms, it’s easy to understand whyshe went off the deep end following Tara’s untimely demise. I wish Season 7 hadexplored this grief and trauma better, instead of hurriedly shoving her into anew relationship, as the show never really allowed her to grieve properly forTara, nor work through the trauma that was so clearly still with her.

Xander

As withBuffy, I believe Xander has two traumas that vie for top billing, and evenworse than with Buffy, the show tends to gloss over both in favour of keeping Xander as the comic relief character, asopposed to trying to explore the effects of these traumas.

The firstone is somewhat of an ongoing trauma in Xander’s life, and that is his abusivehome life. Xander’s home situation and the abuse and neglect he suffers throughis alluded to numerous times throughout the show and many hints indicate that the abuse is not only emotional butphysical too, with the episode Restless all but confirming this. This ongoing abusehas an extremely detrimental effect on Xander and we clearly see this in hisday-to-day behaviour, his attitude towards women and his fears in the laterseasons of becoming an abuser, just like his father. A childhood filled withthis kind of emotional and physical abuse would have and very obviously didhave a deep and lasting impact on Xander.

The secondtrauma, and this is the one that the show completely ignores, is losing hisbest friend in such an abrupt and violent way, and being given no grieving timebefore he is instructed to kill Jesse if he gets the chance. I have spoken numerous times about the effect thistrauma had on Xander and how it is clearly shown in his attitude towardsvampires and his reaction to the Angelus period. Without re-hashing old points,Jesse’s death was traumatic enough to Xander that he was never able toreconcile Buffy allowing not one, but twovampires to survive and thrive next to the Scoobies, and he never fullylets go of his distrust towards the undead.

[fuckyeahamberbenson]

Amber Benson on Writing the Echo Park Coven Novels By HALEY LARSON May 18, 2017

Amber Benson is an author, actor, producer, and director. You may know her from her days as Tara Maclay on “Buffy the Vampire Slayer,” but her career has spanned many more projects than that. As an author, she has written the Calliope-Reaper Jones novels and the Echo Park Coven novels, and co-written several others. While both series are urban fantasy, they each have a completely different tone. The Echo Park Coven novels tell the tale of a coven of witches fighting to save magic from total destruction. The last book in the series, The End of Magic, is out now! Read on as we discuss sisterhood, Nazis, and the magic of physical places.

Unbound Worlds: The witches of Echo Park, and in covens around the world in your books, feel very real. They don’t always get along, they have their interpersonal issues, but at the end of the day, they will always come together to support each other. Are they based off anyone in real life?

Amber Benson: The women in the Echo Park coven are actually based on my own personal friend group – each character is an amalgam of the many important friends in my life. I felt like the idea of intersectional sisterhood gets short shrift in storytelling…and I wanted to explore what it means to be part of a diverse group of women who are there for each other even if they don’t always agree about ideology.

UW: The simple act of sisterhood feels like an act of resistance in these books, especially with the seemingly male-dominant group of antagonists, The Flood. Was this a conscious decision on your part?

AB: Not conscious…but looking back, I guess there is a part of me that had always intuited how badly women need to find a way to come together and support each other – and that includes women from every walk of life. If we are going to survive as a democratic, egalitarian, and forward-thinking society, women have to stop putting each other down and start lifting each other up…because it’s gonna take a unified women and women-identifying front to stop the egregious abuse of power that is working to strip away women’s rights.

UW: The Flood is a terrifying sect that’s trying to bring about the end of magic and witches. They���re the epitome of intolerance — a horrific blend of Nazism and fantasy. Why did you choose them as the villains of the story?

AB: As a half-Jewish girl from Alabama, I’ve always been fascinated by the Third Reich and the idea that true evil can and has existed in the world…which is evidenced by the horror that the Nazis perpetrated during the holocaust.  I wanted to explore the idea of evil being a palpable thing that we, as human beings, have to fight against…and I also wanted to talk about the opposite perspective…the evil perspective, if you will, and the people on that side of the story who feel like their cause is a just one, too. I think All Quiet on The Western Front was an inspiration for me…the idea that everyone has a point of view and raison d’etre…a purpose that may be the polar-opposite of my own – and that I would term ‘evil’ – but is completely valid in their mind.

UW: Dealing with past trauma is a major theme in these books, and for some characters, that trauma is never fully resolved. Was that a theme you set out to discuss, and why did you decide to leave some issues relatively unresolved?

AB: Life is messy. Bad things happen to good people and there is no reason why…nothing we can point to and say: “Oh, it’s because of this or because of that.” This idea terrifies the crap out of us and forces us to deal with a really scary fact of life…that we have zero control over what happens to us. We can lead exemplary lives and be charitable and kind-hearted…but we might still get hit by a car the next time we step off a crosswalk. Trauma happens to everyone. It’s the price of doing business. Of being human. Trauma colors who we are and even when we deal with it, it leaves its scars. I love therapy. I think of it as the gift I give myself…but I’ve learned through the process that we are always growing and changing…always unpacking old hurts and looking at them…always trying to untangle the mystery of who we are and why we do what we do…there are no answers…just more questions…and that was one of the themes I was interested in exploring as I was writing this last book.

UW: Echo Park seems like such a magical place, and it is actually a real place in L.A.! Are there any other places you feel inspired by?

AB: Echo Park is most definitely a real and super magical place – Eleanora’s house, Echo Park Lake, the swing…all real places I’ve been to…I’m a big urban explorer and the stair streets of Echo Park are beyond magical…I would actually take walks that were based around the fruit trees in the neighborhood…I’d walk one set of stairs that had a fig tree at the top and then walk down a weird loopy set of stairs cause they had orange trees along the side of the hill…even now you can still walk down Sunset and get an espresso at a hipster coffee house then go next door and buy a spell at one of the many local Botanicas. As far as other places that inspire me…hmmm…I loved China…the Great Wall was one of the most magical places I’ve ever visited.

UW: Was there anything you found surprising while you were doing research for your novels? Or anything particularly odd or wonderful?

AB: I became obsessed with the Atlas Obscura website while I was doing my research…so much so that I made it my home page. It’s an Amber Benson highly recommended online destination for the weird, wonderful and odd! Plus, I know they do a walking tour of Echo Park every now and again…so the perfect way to get your Witches of Echo Park fix.

UW: You’ve taught some courses on writing–is there anything you can tell someone just starting out?

AB: Just write. Sounds so simple, right? But it’s all about getting words down on paper/screen…even if you don’t end up using them. The craft of writing is…just…writing.

UW: The End of Magic wraps up the Echo Park Coven series–can you tell us anything about what you might be writing next? Will we ever get to return to the world set up in the Echo Park Coven novels?

AB: I think I have put the blood sisters to bed for a while…I loved living in their world, but I’m ready for some new adventures. I’m co-writing (with Sarah Kuhn) the new CLUELESS comic from Boom Studios…and doing some film/television writing…so that’s keeping me busy. Haven’t figured out the next book I want to write yet, but I have some ideas percolating.