#I imagine he made good use of it too. Whenever sephiroth acted out or if they couldn't restrain him for whatever reason

[phoenixcatch7]

Okay but why haven't we had a time travel/fix it fic where after some shenanigans everyone decides to take down shinra, they split up to take out the important figures, sephiroth obviously takes hojo for any and all of a dozen good reasons.

And then hojo pulls a winter soldier sleeper code on him.

And then everyone is suddenly dealing with a brainwashed sephiroth.

-

Hojo has to have some way to control sephiroth as he grew into his monstrous strength and power, yes? And learned helplessness isn't enough of a reassurance your prized military leader powerhouse isn't going to wake up one day and realise just how easily he could paint the labs walls red with chunks of you. And because hojo is obsessed with total power and control, dealing with a murder machine with huge mental issues, it'd only be fitting he create his own emergency shutdown.

In the most needlessly traumatic and mentally violating way, of course. Would sephiroth even know, if he couldn't remember? Would he have long stretches of emptiness in his memories that never get explained to him, or would he wake up where he'd blacked out, just another day in the labs?

Imagine, his allies watching on the cameras, as sephiroth stalks into the labs, a predator sighting its prey, exchanging a few cold words with hojo, raising masamune... And then hojos mouth opening, sephiroth going stiff like an animatronic, rearranging himself on the floor where he stood, face hidden behind his hair. Hojo leaves the room and he doesn't move, doesn't respond to any comms or passing scientists accidentally rolling a cart over his coat and hair.

Hojo ordering sephiroth to reveal their plans, their allies, their resources. Sephiroth doing it. Hojo deciding to punish sephiroth for the rebellion with lab procedures, or hojo ordering him to hunt down his co conspirators and end the takeover. Sephiroth doing so, heavy in his steps, crashing through walls and doors, heedless now of morals or civilians, silent, unresponsive. So completely unlike the jenova malice they'd been prepared to fight, that sephiroth had been bracing against. No arrogance, no mocking, no dramatic battlefield or hungry glowing eyes.

The puppeteer becomes the puppet, and with it, every trace of holding back. The perfect soldier.

I imagine the first trigger word would be lucrecia.

[crisiscutie]

I always wonder why SQEX use the title 'Crisis' to almost every prequel of FF7, i.e Crisis Core, Before Crisis, Ever Crisis. Is 'crisis' really implied toward Sephiroth?

Also, I'm apprehensive on playing the next part of FF7R because I don't want to beat up poor Sephy again (TT_TT). No matter how many ppl say he is strong or evil, to me he's just a poor baby.

But I'll definitely play when SQEX decide to release a sequel where Sephiroth as the main character. I even got in a habit of apologizing to the monitor whenever I finally defeat Seohiroth. Am I weird? Does anyone else feels like this?

No anon, don't feel weird about being yourself~!

༻❁༺ Crisis Cutie's Favorite Word?

Personally, I think "Crisis" could be applied as a collective term to FF7's cast. It's definitely one of Sephiroth's special words alongside reunion and despair, though. We know little about Sephiroth's role in EC now, but I wonder if his story arc will be another variant of his identity crisis, like in Crisis Core and Before Crisis. It'd certainly be an emotional crisis regardless, though.

I feel you on Sephiroth but at the same time; I understand the need to put him down, and it brings such heavy feelings to my heart. 💔💔💔 I've noticed that almost no one seems to give Sephiroth any empathy, even Aerith, who's pretty much the Sora of the series.

Sephiroth's actions brought everyone deep sorrow and crisis. It's clear why they felt such despair and hatred towards him. Quick disclaimer, I'm not blaming anyone or anything here, just pointing something out. Also Aerith just knows there is no turning Sephiroth from the path of evil. In 7R, she's completely right when she told him that everything about him was wrong, in every sense.

༻❁༺ Cycle of Pain

I knew Vincent indirectly expressed empathy (from what I remembered). He understood how the circumstances of Sephiroth's birth lead him to who he is. That's why he couldn't bring himself to confront Lucrecia with the harsh reality of what her son had become...

And we as the audience have the benefit of seeing both sides of the story. I understand why Sephiroth's trauma of abandonment, emotional abuse, and killing/fighting was became much to bear, leading to his breakdown in Nibelheim.

And I can imagine the despair and fury that Tifa and Cloud experienced when Sephiroth committed his abhorrent acts at Nibelheim. Tifa refused to be part of the cycle of pain that Sephiroth kept alive, and instead extended a hand to Cloud, saving him from his own descent. Without the bonds that Cloud had built, he could have easily become like Sephiroth.

Vincent, like Tifa, made the decision to break the cycle for himself. Despite his broken bonds and difficult circumstances, he was able to stay true to his inner goodness and remain on the path of good.

༻❁༺ Another Crisis Game Please!

I would love to play a game starring Sephiroth. Honestly, I think Crisis Core should've been the game for the First Class Boyos. It just had too much going on within the plot (IMO) and the game suffered from the constraints of originally being a handheld game. Zack is a great character, but honestly, he was just "there" a lot of times. He only took a permanent, active role closer to the end, which he had to for plot reasons. And I loved it!

Zack saw the results of his attempt to live heroically and play by the rules... It had not brought him to his hoped-for destination. He tried so hard to endure the terrible events and he did! But his prize was death and betrayal. Like Aerith, he was just too good for the world... It's interesting how similar his death is to hers. They faced immense hardships, but their powerful sense of morality and bonds kept them true to themselves while dying for a selfless and noble cause.

Honestly, the whole main cast of FF7 needs a fountain of hugs.

[silverflqmes]

NOT VERY OFTEN😭 or i’m just in so much shock that im like ARE YOU BEING FR?? ( coming from someone who wasn’t usually the funny or jokey one among friends.. )

YEAH MY GAMING BECAME MORE LIMITED AS I FURTHERED MY HS CAREER😭 i was rlly strict on myself during my final yr cuz i had to repeat it ( had a rlly bad year with covid and all cuz it fucked w my studies</3 ) soo i just limited myself to genshin impact and tekken- since i would play against my dad so i had an opponent LMAO that’s uh weirdly when my interest for ff started to brew bc noctis got added as a dlc for tekken 7 back in 2017 so i was like oooh!! however.. i did not act on said interest🥹 i was like nope!! cannot afford it with how bad i procrastinate.. but fr?? if you go for vet tech i hope it works out!! im going to a uni college, so it’ll be a bit of everything but i want to go into arts and humanities<3 its a three yr cram program but im excited for it!!

i heard that the remakes were pretty different from the og, but im excited to see in what direction it goes in because of that since it’s something the audience already knows and yet there is this suspense because there are bound to be unexpected changes and twists🥸 BUT IM LIVING FOR WHATEVER SEFIKURA STUFF THE DEVELOPERS DECIDED TO FEED THEIR AUDIENCE CUZ ITS JUST INSANE TO ME?? half the time i gotta ask myself if im IMAGINING IT?? the developers are fr SPOILING sefikura enjoyers let them get together and violently make out in the third installment. KIDDING🤠 most definitely kidding.. ( maybe. ) but im really loving cc even if it made me cry last night ( angeal sobs )😭 it’s just like — the ffvii version of revenge of the sith ( for reference this is my fav film of all time ) and im EATING it up🤭 even if it’s gonna tear me tf down at the end.. but it’s great, i just wish more details were added :’) it goes by really fast?? i think it would have been more suspenseful to build up more to lead up to sephiroth’s fall from grace, cuz then the audience gets like EVEN MORE ATTACHED and has even more to lose ahaha.. i’ve seen bits of rebirth and i wanna play so so bad but i gotta hold off on the ps5😔 ec is good but i feel you about the whole stuffing sephiroth lore into a mobile game.. it’s just😭 but yeah i decided to play, it’s grind heavy but i’m trying to get to sephi :’) its just taking some time to level up🙁

oneshots are smtn i do for friends too and just to experiment a little with my writing — or whenever i need a break from fics to just write small stuff and rebuild inspiration :’) headcanons are also fun to do just cuz i get to be unhinged LMAO all types of practices cashes out tho!! but yeah i used to gatekeep too, i was so embarrassed to have ppl read my stuff.. but i kinda just was like fuck it why not🫡 although i took down all my old stuff cuz.. cringe.

dialogue goes hard fr and when a line delivers SO perfectly i just gotta slam my phone or book down, pace about and then return to it.. BAHAHAHA FANTASY BOOKS DO THAT YEAH me personally i do like to be descriptive just cuz i like to set the scene so that my audience is able to see what i see and feel what’s happening outside of the dialogue but it depends what direction i took — if it’s something more imagery focused, dialogue is less emphasized on — if it’s more conversation focused, then dialogue takes the spotlight! i agree with what you mean with the fighting for sure too cuz they definitely need it to communicate since it’s kinda what they were molded into doing ( shinra i will have you by the throat one of these days. ) so i think it’s essential to their relationship LMAO especially for cloud since he has a harder time expressing himself.. sephiroth i mean, has a tough time with feelings too — but he’s a little better at them than cloud is😭 DUDE WHEN TIFA CAUGHT THEM I DEADASS THREW MY PHONE ACROSS THE BED AND SCREAMED INTO MY PILLOW I WAS LIKE NO NO NO😵‍💫 but im glad things at the end despite the conflict was sorted — even if tifa was like yeah uh saw my besti get his back blown out by his enemy, totally normal about this ( she was not ). FF7 RLLY IS A TRAGEDY ISTG I ALWAYS END UP LIKING THE ANGSTIEST SHIT😭 relived you do happy endings tho, it’s healing honestly. reading is about escaping fr so its best to escape to something guaranteed to end well despite hardship!

OOO A DRAGON?? im a monkey BAHAJAHS i think that pairs sillily with gemini, although a lot of my friends think i act like a taurus more😭 which makes sense since im on the cusp ( may 23rd is my birthday and gemini i believe begins the 21st )🐒 honestly never tried the question thing now that i think abt it.. well, somewhat.. usually i like doing au stuff so my questions are more like hahaha what if haikyuu was set in star wars or acotar or genshin — basically something like that and then i do a load of world building😭 which i love<3 but i get that! i mean you’ve been acquainted with them for this long so it eventually comes naturally yeah? BUT YOURE SO RIGHT, i have had moments where i was like SHIT i wish i added this and then i rework things to make my new editions possible LMAO

schedules and writers are like water and oil, kudos to the authors who can actually keep schedules😭 BUT SHIT YEAH I WOULD PASS OUT IF I HAD TO WRITE THAT MUCH IN ONE SITTING granted i have days where i pump out 2-3k words but then i have days where i put one sentence and im like okay thats enough😶 HAKAHWKWJSJ I WAS JUST SHOCKED SINCE WE GOT SO LENGTHY😭😭 but i do have discord!! i’ll dm you my user after i finish LMAOAOAOAOAISSKKS

DUDE I LOVE OLD FILMS SM AND WITH THE TECHNOLOGY THEY HAD ITS JUST SO??? i wish ppl would appreciate it more but i guess newer generations are spoiled now😭 I HEARD SOMETHING LIKE THAT ABOUT SEPH’S HAIR THATS HONESTLY SO INSANE TO ME they fr were like we cannot butcher homeboy he’s gotta eat up the audience, love them for that so much<3 BUT YEAH!! that’s honestly so crazy to think about, every time i look back on my interests and the source it came from or i guess the what initiated it — its just so crazy??? to weirdly think that i would not be doing any of this if it wasnt for my guy best friend — who i had a crush on for the longest time.. and wanted to get into his interests to become closer with him — which resulted in me discovering fanfic on my own, writing it and getting the courage to share my writing with others, as well as making cool friends😭 BAKAHSWKSJ YEAH I AM🫣 THATS SO CRAZY TO THINK ABOUT THOUGH??? no wonder you write so wonderfully, you really really honed your craft<33 AKAKAKS THAT SOUNDS FUN THO🥹 my old best friend at the time when i began writing would co-write with me and we would also draw scenes too- back then it was when we played wizard101 together, minecraft and sims — and just spawned all these handwritten and drawn stories😵‍💫😵‍💫 it was so much fun, i kept all of them<3 GEEZ DELETED??? that sounds like wattpad now, they rlly just kinda fucked up the whole site.. that’s why i keep nsfw content here :’) HELP THE LEMON AND LIME ERA AJAJAJSHS that is such a throwback oml, now its gone to smut and most recently- spice among book lovers😭😭

zakkura was doomed a bit yeah</3 im not sure how things turned out in rebirth since i hear he’s in it?? but im rooting for him and aerith more😭 they are just so cute in cc together🙁 BAKQSH yeah sefikura.. its a tough call🥹 but they both need each other — like one cannot be without the other no matter how many times cloud tries to reject him.. DUDE I LOVE OLD SCHOOL BL THO<3 maybe thats why i was so drawn to your fics cuz honestly i dont read ship stuff anymore since im a little more self indulgent ahahaha.. but sefikura snatched me up in such a stunning move🧎‍♀️

LMAOO YEAH HE IS he’s such a sweetheart<3 i love him being the mediator and comedic relief, the much needed extrovert among two emotionally constipated introverts BAHAHAHA but yeah.. i figured things might be a little rocky between cloud and seph after the ending of SI but zack will help, i believe in him!!! ESPECIALLY WITH THAT EXCERPT ABAHAHSSHKW i bet cloud would let sephiroth sit on his lap to prove a point tbh ( it probably fails and leads him to getting teased instead AHAHAHAHA )

HELP IM JUST NATURALLY NAIVE😭😭 might also be the cloud kinnie in me cuz i continuously stumbled into those thinking patterns of like okay theres a happy ending BUT IS SOMETHING GONNA HAPPEN TO SEPHIROTH BECAUSE THE POSSIBILITY OF DEATH KEEPS GETTING MENTIONED AND IDK WHAT TO THINK.. so you successfully got me to follow the cloud train of thoughts🤣 but yeah writing is about playing your audience a bit, even i do that especially with my constant need of leaving cliffhangers ahahahhaha… its rlly important to get them in touch with their emotions cuz it draws them in more — which is what happened to me ehe.. BRO YEAH IAYSKSJSKSKS in ID the whole time im like oh gosh what is he planning all we know is cloud’s pov so it leaves me wanting to know what sephiroth is gonna do yk?? so once again — you succeeded on that BAHAHAHAHA speaking of its almost 1am I HAVE GOT TO READ CH 15🫡 ao3 was down today and i almost combusted im so glad it repaired itself cuz i was like NO WAY NOT WHEN I WAITED ALL WEEK FOR THIS MOMENT😭 kinda worked out tho cuz i finished my motivation later yayayay~

aaaa i hope it’s gotten better, it’s tough to deal with that — i used to have really bad anxiety a couple years back due to school :’) but i’ve somewhat gotten better, my only issue is stress.. im glad sefikura has helped you though!! AND THAT LIFE GETS KINDER TO YOU BC YOU DESERVE IT FOR BEING SO SWEET🙁❤️

OMW TO THE REUNION AFTER I HYPE UP MY BESTI REAL QUICK🕺 EEEEEK SO EXCITED TO READ<33

hi hi not necessarily an ask but i wanted to tell you that your works are so good??? like i’m still trying to wrap my head around the fact that your stories are not the canon plot of ff7 AND YET IT FEELS SO REALISTIC BECAUSE YOU PORTRAY THE CHARACTERS SO WELL??? i fr almost gaslighted myself for a second there BAHAHAHA ahem, anyway, really love your style of writing, it’s so refreshing to me<3 literally got me giddy and looking forward to fic updates for the first time in awhile?? i’ve been in a reading slump for a good minute and your sefikura fics dragged me out in the most emotional yet spicy way possible IDK HOW YOU DO IT WITH THE WAY TAG TEAMING SMUT AND ANGST SO LANGUIDLY, LITERALLY GOT ME UGLY CRYING ONE MINUTE AND THEN SCREAMING THE NEXT

the power you hold oml but anyway — all in all it’s immaculate, eating it up fr🧎‍♀️ can’t wait to read more!!

and ummmm.. my bad for the word vomit i fr had to simp on main and show my appreciation🫡 have a good rest of your day / night!!<33

Wow, thank you so much! 😱 It’s not everyday I get praised like that, and I’m so honored you like my work that much! 🥰 I love to write, and I have original work on the backburner indefinitely because sefikura has stolen my soul for all eternity, haha. And I know exactly what you mean, I was so disappointed that fics I liked a lot only updated once a year or were left unfinished and I just...got so fed up with it that I decided I’d rather just spend my time writing my own than keep trying to read them. That’s why I’ll never leave a story unfinished(though sequels may take a while to appear). My comments section on AO3 is open to both users and guests, so you are always free to scream about it there or here, I don’t mind in the slightest! It makes me excited to post when you’re excited for the update, too! 

Out of curiosity, which story got you hooked on my work? 👀 In Death is my current fic that has 5 chapters left, and I’ll post one every single Friday until it’s complete, with chapter 15 coming out in just a couple days~! Ahh, the reunion is almost at hand! I also made a special image for the final chapter, and I can’t wait to share it. :) Thank you for leaving me such a lovely comment, I’m truly honored to receive it! 💖💖

[leonawriter]

To Change A Sombre Morrow (chapter ten)

Read it on AO3

Fandom: Final Fantasy VII

Characters: Genesis, Sephiroth, Angeal, others.

Summary: Various people get to play the asshole. Some more intentionally than others. Genesis is vaguely ignorant - and unaware - and is starting to realise as much.

...

Genesis' mind turns into white static at the sudden addition of a familiar long blade unexpectedly appearing to clash against his own in the middle of his training.

His body responded automatically, patterns coming back by reflex while his mind is still struggling to catch up - not even Jenova cells at their strongest could recover that fast from a flash of fire to the face, a kick to the stomach area, his sword brought around to-

Nothing.

Adrenaline buzzes in his ears, a warning that something is wrong. The feeling that any moment now, there will be black feathers and silver hair. The conflict between the need to bring out his own wing for the ability to fly and to utilise the advanced combat capabilities it gave him and the agitated feeling that he was forgetting something, with how the wind didn't sting and the dust didn't dry his eyes or burn his skin-

There's a slight breeze as he turns around, only to see Sephiroth regarding him quite calmly from several feet away. Masamune is still drawn, but not attack-ready. He tilts his head, and the slight wind picks up his hair, obscuring his face even further. 

A Behemoth lay, sliced apart and completely motionless, on the ground between them, before disintegrating into pixels. The landscape stayed the same, although now that he was reminded that it was merely a digital representation of the Midgar wastes, a lot of things made much more sense.

"So. It seems your reaction to my presence wasn't merely a one off occurrence. I had wondered."

"If you wanted to spar, you could have just asked," Genesis bit back, nerves still on edge.

"That," Sephiroth said deliberately, "would have defeated the point entirely. And besides," he added, matter of fact, "you've been avoiding me again." 

Genesis' mouth opened to retort that no, he had not, but his hand tightened around Rapier's hilt. Remembered how his regained memories that had given him the unwanted gift of nightmares had left him unsure of how to handle his interactions for a time. He looked away, grimacing as he realised that they had noticed.

Avoidance hadn't been an issue in the past. His issues hadn't been the kind he'd felt the need to avoid people over, and in the few cases where they had been, it had been easy enough just to not bring up the problem, pretend it didn't exist. 

Being a deserter and fugitive had meant that the only times people had wanted to find him were when they wanted to hunt him down - and not usually to have a friendly discussion. As though he would have encouraged that sort of idea in the first place, at the time.

Waking up to a world post-Meteor had meant that he had been left to himself for the most part again. It was taken as a given that if you'd been part of SOLDIER, if anyone had worked for Shinra, then you'd need time to sort your head out.

Here and now... there was none of that. It seemed that he would constantly be discovering new ways in which his temporal displacement made life harder for him.

"...Honestly, I can't imagine what could have happened to you, to cause my presence to be that distressing." Sephiroth sounded... disturbed. Frustrated. Of course you wouldn't, was Genesis' immediate reaction, but that wouldn't do anything for either of them. "But if that is the case, then I will... remove myself."

Genesis closed his eyes, unsure who or what the surge of disgust and hatred brought about by those words was caused by or aimed at, as Sephiroth straightened, suddenly cold - no, withdrawn, that's what Cloud looks like whenever he's in one of his moods - and walked past him, dismissing his sword and terminating the program as he went, so that the environment around them dissolved into digital data as it turned back into the training room.

This is what I'm good at, isn't it? I push people away, and then I wonder why none of us can handle the pressure. Cloud's group had never been like this. Cloud's group had stuck together for as long as he'd known them. And before they'd been Cloud's group, Zack had done the same. I wonder if that's why all of this happened in the first place. 

They would probably know what to do, he thought bitterly. But the Goddess sent me.

"My friend, your desire is the giver of life, the Gift of the Goddess..."

Sephiroth paused, at the door.

"LOVELESS, again? You've moved to Act Three," he said, the words halting rather than the easy ribbing they'd once been.

"What else? But... no. I think we're still in the prologue."

Remembering what he'd said to Vincent, back in Nibelheim. Remembering how he looked at the calendars and found himself flicking through diaries and organisers, irritated at how slowly time passed, how much was still yet to happen, to be changed, to be stopped, and he felt like he had hardly moved, despite everything that he had accomplished.

"What an odd thing to say."

"Well, we still have a long way to go." He turned on his heel, to talk to Sephiroth's back rather than the wall. "I mean what I said before. If you want to spar, ask me. No one likes the ass who pokes at a person's issues just to see how they'll react," he said wryly.

"Oh? It almost sounds like you're speaking from experience."

Even knowing he was probably just referring to something relatively harmless, Genesis still flinched.

"I can't say I'm not fool enough anymore to say that's wrong," he mused, half in answer and half to himself.

Sephiroth huffed, head tilting forward slightly as he made the amused sound, before picking up his feet again and moving out of the training room altogether, but not before Genesis noticed that despite not knowing what he had been doing, some of the tension in Sephiroth's shoulders had loosened.

"Ha..."

Somehow, he didn't think that it could possibly be as simple as that.

...

"If it weren't for how you seem to have become allergic to doctors recently, I'd warn you away from the science department's floors," Angeal started saying the moment Genesis got in through the door of his office. "Actually, I'm still going to warn you to be careful."

He rolled his eyes, swept his hair away from his face, and leaned Rapier up against the wall before sitting heavily into his chair, and reaching for a pen, which he immediately started to tap onto the desk, taking some small pleasure in the fact that he knew it irritated his friend.

"I know that that already. They've been buzzing around like irritable wasps in white coats for a while now." Tap tap tap. He knew why, too, of course. Not that he was going to admit that any time soon. "The more pressing matter is why you're here. Don't you have an overexcitable puppy to be training?"

Angeal's brows raised, making Genesis wonder if he'd said something wrong, or if something had happened. 

"Lazard wanted you to look over these," Angeal said, waving a hand at a pile of files on his desk that he hadn't even noticed until then, "and I figured I'd stay to make sure you actually did."

Genesis flipped open the top file, only to find a nondescript, unfamiliar face staring back at him. A glance at the rest of the page showed him a name, some basic details, and notes from the Instructors that tested the cadets.

He opened up a few others, creating a small pile of chaos on his desk. Once or twice, a name or face stirred faint recollections in the back of his mind - years old, dusty memories - and even rarer, was the one time when he knew he remembered the prospective cadet, but that wasn't necessarily a good thing.

"Lazard seems to have mixed up which department he's running, then. This is SOLDIER, not human resources. Or-" He cut himself off. There was no way that saying that SOLDIER were the human resource would be taken well. 

Angeal rolled his eyes, smiling even though Genesis could tell that there was at least some annoyance in his friend, too.

"That's more or less what Sephiroth said, but at least he's able to get out of it with the excuse that they're sending him back off to the frontlines in the next day or so. And supposedly, according to Lazard at least, they seem to think that if they play things right, the war will be over soon, so they'll be able to be more picky when it comes to new recruits."

Genesis bit back a snort at the poor excuse the science department had come up with; if Shinra had the resources, then they would continue creating SOLDIERs, and if they had the SOLDIERs, then they would create their own wars. The one they'd had with Wutai had been that way.

His amusement bled out at the reminder of how little time he had left.

"And they expect us to be able to tell just by looking at paperwork?" he asked. Typical Shinra.

Not for the first time, he was struck by how strange it was that he was working for them again. 

"Maybe they just didn't want to terrorise the cadets so early into their training."

His hand stilled as his eyes passed over a photo of a cadet with blond hair, but it was too curly, too dark, the face wrong, and when he looked closer, the eyes were still a light brown. Had to remind himself that no, Cloud would not be here yet, because if nothing else Genesis had flown back, and Hojo had probably used a company helicopter to get as close as he could. Cloud, having none of that, would take longer. Far longer.

He had to assume that in the original timeline he'd come from, none of this had happened. He certainly couldn't remember being asked to do such a thing before, no matter how distant or close he'd ever been with any of the cadets. Shinra had vetted the SOLDIER intake on basic merits and a psychological assessment to ensure they'd make it through the mako injections, and any that hadn't made it past that, they didn't hear anything further of, and that didn't always mean they'd just gotten shunted into the infantry. 

Which meant that he might even recognise some of these names and faces, which should in theory give him an edge - in theory, at least.

In practice, all looking at the files was doing for him was piling frustration onto more frustration - the overwhelming realisation that despite having lured at least a good number of these men and women - teenagers still, here, the birth dates couldn't lie unless the candidates had, and the faces looked young sometimes - he hardly remembered who they were. Who they'd been.

He almost let out a shaky laugh, holding his face in the hand that wasn't turning the pages of the files.

I used them. 

He'd known before. He'd had plenty of time to come to terms with the fact, even before Zack had reminded him of what having SOLDIER pride even meant. He'd been reminded, oh so politely, when Deepground had 'requested' his aid, and made him aware of what else had been done with his genetic information.

They thought I cared. Perhaps I had, before. They were wrong. I only cared about myself.

"I worry about you, sometimes."

Genesis tensed, abruptly reminded of Angeal's presence, having become so immersed in himself and his memories that he'd forgotten he wasn't alone. 

"Perhaps you're right to," he muttered under his breath, not looking away from a face that he knew that if he stared at it long enough, he would remember something he wished best left forgotten.

"What was that?"

His eyes finally closed. "When the war of the beast's brings about the world's end, the goddess descends from the sky, wings of light and dark spread afar..."

They're sending us all off to die valiantly for their cause. They think that Sephiroth will continue to be the perfect toy soldier they modelled him into  being, never once thinking that he might become bigger than any of this, or realise that the chains that bind him are as flimsy as cardboard, like I did. 

His pen began to tap again, a smile, not entirely pleasant, playing on his lips.

"Genesis..."

Angeal's tone was worried again, but a different sort of worry. It was almost nostalgic, the way it reminded him of how Angeal always had worried too much when he'd been planning something reckless. It was too bad he wasn't going to be able to share those ideas of his this time around.

 "You're planning something again, aren't you," Angeal carried on. "And you aren't going to tell anyone what you're doing again either, are you?" His friend looked away, and sighed. "When you went off last time, we had no idea where you'd gone until Lazard told us. We had to ask. And when you came back..."

Angeal trailed off. For the first time perhaps, Genesis noticed how tired his friend was. 

...Honestly, I can't imagine what could have happened to you, to cause my presence to be that distressing. But if that is the case, then I will... remove myself.

"Angeal, I..."

He wanted, more than anything in that moment, to explain everything, let the words fall from his mouth like dumbapples over the fences and walls that he seemed to have put up without even having realised that he had been putting down the wood and bricks between them. A peace offering.

He closed his eyes for just one moment, and saw Banora burning in front of him as he watched - an empty town with nothing left to destroy, as the Turks had merely been destroying the evidence of his own crimes.

"Zack's been complaining that he was actually starting to get somewhere with you, you know. Keeps saying you look at him like you can see his potential."

He could almost laugh. 

How could he say that he sometimes had that look in his eye because he had seen their future - a future where Zack had achieved that potential, carried Angeal's Buster Sword, because Angeal was dead?

He could just imagine the arguments, the accusations, the dismissals, the weapons drawn...

Genesis shook his head.

"I'll see what I can do," he said instead. 

His mind wandered toward the date. It was late September, now. He felt like he was lying.

...

He'd left Edge and Midgar behind without having told anyone, not long after regaining his energy, and being able to move around without someone looking like they were going to hold him at sword point simply for stepping out of line.

It's a familiar route, to Banora. He could probably fly there in his sleep, like how a chocobo knew its way home.

The journey had still taken a while, though, but that'd mostly been because he'd made an effort not to fly near too many people, and in the past three years, people had been rebuilding, and creating entirely new towns. It had changed the landscape, and the world had seemed a different place.

He's sure there's a an old children's story along those lines. From before Shinra, but sanitised so that anything the company had been displeased with had been removed - about a man who slept for a hundred years inside a crystal, and who had woken up to find that nothing was familiar, and all his friends were old.

Banora itself, he'd found as he'd approached on the back of a truck, had not changed all that much, though. 

If anything, the Lifestream must have found it easier to burst forth here, coming up through ways that were already open. A few places seemed a little more worn away than before, but in general...

What was new, was the few huts that had sprung up near the orchards, people picking the apples, which had made his fingers twitch for his materia, because some of those were his trees - his, damn it - but he had forced himself to look away, to focus on what he'd come here for.

The caves were colder than he remembered, but the routes hadn't changed. 

Rapier had been right where he'd left it, where it had fallen after his fight with Zack. The once beautiful sword had been caked with dirt, with a few patches of rust in places that had become damp, but none of that had mattered. It was and had been an old friend, a constant he had been glad to see once more.

He could still remember wiping it down briefly before wrapping it up to clean it properly later, and leaving.

"Wha- hey! Be careful in here, these caves can be dangerous!"

He'd laughed, at the voice that had echoed in toward him. It must have been late on the surface, and the sun had always set away from the entrance, but it had never been all that dark inside, and he'd known the way like any child did their own playground. Their home.

"You don't need to worry about me," he'd said, bemused, as he'd come out.

The man, who had been hauling a heavy crate of apples, had turned. Backed away, first one step, then another. 

"You..." Fear had laced the man's voice. His eyes, glowing, were wide. "They said you were dead," he said. "What do you want with us? Shinra's gone!"

"Even if the morrow is barren of promises, nothing shall forestall my return..." He'd shaken his head. "Death and rumours of my demise have hardly held me back before. I fail to see why I should have adhered to them." He'd taken an apple, a single Banora White, while his other hand still held his old sword still in its wrappings. "As for your questions... nothing. I don't want anything from you."

He could still remember the terror in  the eyes of the former SOLDIER even weeks later, when he finally told Cloud, which had been while he was maintaining the sword back to perfect condition after its long disuse.

"I didn't merely recognise him," he'd said, in a light tone as though it wasn't important. As though it was simply some trivial matter, another item on the delivery list. "He served under me during the war. I'm fairly sure the only reason he didn't follow me when I encouraged desertion was something to do with not wanting to disappoint his family - saying that he'd attempt to work on Shinra from the inside."

Cloud hadn't said anything, although by the frown on his face he wasn't entirely unaffected. 

"The next time we saw each other," Genesis had carried on, harsh cracks in the edges of his carefree attitude appearing in both his voice and the more jagged movements he was making while cleaning, "I only saw him as an obstacle in my way. Honestly, he's lucky to be alive."

He'd told himself that was at least one positive in the entire situation. At least if you met the people you'd wronged, they were still alive to meet. You couldn't meet the ghosts you'd left behind.

After a while, he had resigned himself to the fact that he more than likely wasn't going to get any sort of reply. But then, Cloud was hardly the talkative type. Zack had been, would have said something already, but no matter how many of Zack's mannerisms he could see coming to the surface from time, Cloud wasn't Zack.

Then-

"I think... I think I know what you mean," Cloud had said. He'd looked over. Bright blue eyes had looked troubled, the same way that Genesis had started to recognise in any of them when they began to think too much of the past. "When we were fighting Shinra, I... for a long time, I didn't even really know who I was. But then when I did, when I remembered... I realised I'd probably been killing a lot of the people I once fought beside. Some of them... even recognised me. And I still had to keep fighting. It isn't the same, but..."

Understanding.

They were both traitors to their own people, just on different sides of history. One remembered with fear and the other looked up to. 

He'd nodded, and the subject had turned toward lighter subjects the next time anyone spoke.

...

Genesis walks out of Lazard's office and doesn't realise that he has his hand at his shoulder until Angeal asks him if it's giving him grief again. He shakes his head, and shrugs it off, because it hadn't been. 

Old habits were hard to kill, and it's easy to get lost in memories when events play out a little too similarly.

He'd been given his marching orders once again. To Wutai, and Fort Tamblin. He could still remember the way that Lazard had danced around the subject of what he would actually be doing the first time around; the way that they had both treated the briefing almost as a scene in some gaudy theatre production full of intrigue and betrayal.

One of the more dry derivative works of LOVELESS had focused on the politics of the countries at war, and the effect the heroes' actions had on the world. It had been both similar to, and nothing at all like, that.

This time, Lazard had glanced at him aside several times, words prodding lightly at prospective openings. Genesis had made a few pointed remarks, implications, loopholes in supposedly simple things.

Genesis Rhapsodos holds no love for Shinra, he had communicated with everything unsaid and implied. But he is a hero, no matter what manner of monster Shinra has made him, and Goddess help you if you try to make him anything less.

He knew the difference now. At least, wanted to think that.

But now - he brushed the hair from his face to keep his hand from going back to his shoulder, put on a smile, and kept walking.

...

He slips out of the Shinra building as it starts to grow dark, not bothering to change his clothes but walking with that exact sort of confidence that made people question what they were seeing, made them assume that he clearly had business being where he was.

It wasn't hard. It was something he'd had practice in since his childhood, after all, and had even encouraged Angeal to it when his friend had looked panicked enough that he would have been caught if he hadn't calmed down one time; Genesis would have been annoyed if he had been, given how Angeal, despite the difference in status, had been his friend. One of his only friends back then, at that. He'd preferred Angeal out of trouble, if possible.

The theatre he found wasn't in LOVELESS Avenue. Instead, his feet had taken him to somewhere between the slums and the lower class parts of the entertainment district. 

"When the war of the beasts brings about the world's end, the goddess descends from the sky," the man on the stage was saying. Genesis mouthed the words of the introduction to the act along with him - the bare bones of the story, the only thing that anyone could ever agree on, considering how many versions and derivative works there had been even at the time when it had been new. Now, even a slight change in wording could completely alter the tone of a scene.

It wasn't one of the expensive, extravagant productions to be found in one of the more upper class regions. Nor was it one of the philosophical, meaningful productions to be found in Junon, where the university students there used it as their outlet for exploration of the meaning of life.

The sets were shaky. The lines, often far more colloquial than Genesis was used to. Costumes were haphazard.

But the performance, despite everything else, had heart. For that, he could appreciate it, well worth his time far more than the easy viewing that he had been anticipating. A pleasant surprise.

Lost amid his own thoughts - about the play, their interpretation of it, the war, among other things - he knocks into someone on his way to the train that leads back to Sector Eight, and from there, the Shinra Building. He almost wouldn't have noticed if he hadn't heard the cut off cry as they fell.

He watches as she - and he even thinks he recognises her, auburn hair in a braid and light blue clothes - picks herself up again before he could even offer to help, if he had chosen to.

"Oh! I remember you," she said, "From the church, right?" She smiled. "Just passing through again, are you?"

Genesis raised his eyebrows at her. 

"Do you have a habit of remembering everyone who passes through that church?"

"No. Just the-" her face twisted for a moment, as though she were trying to figure out the right words to use. As though she's forgotten her script, said the part of him that was still riding the high of having come out of a halfway decent performance. "Interesting ones," she finished.

"Fascinating," Genesis drawled out. "Unfortunately, I don't have time to ask just how you find me interesting."

"That's all right. I'm sure we'll meet again."

The words followed him all the way back to his rooms in Shinra. She'd probably meant that given how they'd met by chance twice already in spite of Midgar being the sprawling metropolis it was, the probability was high that it would happen again.

A shiver ran down his spine, however, remembering the exact way that something about her had tugged on the edges of his perception - not quite there, but almost, like a word on the tip of his tongue. 

From the church, right?

It was her church. Or at least, we all think of it as hers. It's where Cloud found her...

He shrugged off his coat, and began to lay out his things so that they would be ready for the morning. They wouldn't leave until mid-morning, but it was still better to be prepared for every eventuality.

Some of the stitching was beginning to pull apart on the repair job he'd done when he'd arrived back that day; he would have to fix it again. 

But not tonight.

The goddess is laughing at me, he thought, just as he drifted off. There's something I'm not seeing.