#I hope you know how much I appreciate even those who don't reach out
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seeminglydark · 1 year ago
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It's not so much an ask but I did want to say (especially as the void is otherwise fairly quiet today) that I have been reading your comics and enjoying them immensely. Both in that they are well made with interesting plots and beautiful illustrations, and also that the content is extremely meaningful to a lot of people -myself very much included. I wish I had come across your work earlier. I wish I could send some of it back to myself at points in the past when I was having a really rough time with a lot of things. I wish I could send you some of the love and appreciation I have for what you do, past just writing you a little note.
But I'm afraid a little note is all I can do for you right now, so in it I would like to say that you have brought warmth and hope and comfort to many people with what you create and we are very grateful for it, for you, to be writing what you do and sharing it with us. It's okay to have an off day and feel bleh, everyone does now and then, but I don't want you to think for a minute that what you share isn't worth sharing, that it isn't loved and appreciated, that it isn't helpful, useful or meaningful to anyone because it really, really is.
I may not be the best writer and I don't know if this will convey well what I want it to, but I wanted to say it and I hope you understand it, and remember:
You are not what your anxiety thinks of you.
Thank you for reducing me to tears in a good way. I wish I had the presence of mind to be more eloquent in reply. I deleted my little vent post cuz I felt embarrassed crying in tumblr tags, you know? It's hard to reach out to friends sometimes, especially when I can't articulate what's actually wrong, and sometimes I just need to get my bad thoughts out of my head and into somewhere else (tumblr tags i guess) . I can't believe someone actually thought to take time out of their day to sit down and write something so kind.
All I can really say is Thank you. So much. I hope you know how much it means to me. It means the world to know the things I make mean something to you too.
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juleswritesstuff · 5 months ago
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Starving
Basically, just Theo being the munch that he is.
theodore nott x fem!reader
warnings: smut
Enjoy💗
You had always hated Herbology with a deep passion.
Not the plants per se, those were rather fascinating to observe, but did they really need to have such a vast variety of species ? Was it actually necessary ?
Apparently it was, or Mrs Sprout wouldn't have given you a whole 600 words essay to write on every type of mandrake known to man.
Those screaming little things got on your nerves, and you could barely understand what the professor was talking about while tending to them. Hence, you were finding it extremely difficult to complete that paper.
The door of your dorm room suddenly opened and you had to restrain a curse from slipping through gritted teeth.
You had really hoped to not get interrupted.
Apparently your prayers weren't heard.
“You busy, dolcezza ?” (sweetie)
A more than familiar voice reached your ears. You lifted your eyes from your paper and they landed on none other than Theodore Nott, who was standing right in front of your door, now closed again, with a faint smirk plastered on his face. 
You rolled your eyes. You knew that little grin all too well.
“Kind of, yeah” you replied, your attention going back to the paper in front of you as you started scribbling again with your quill “Aren't you ? Have you already finished your essay ?” you asked, cocking an eyebrow.
“Just turned it in, so I have some time to kill” he said with that cocky attitude of his.
Infuriating and charming at the same time, truly unfair.
“Good for you, then. I don't, so if you could leave me to it, it would be much appreciated” you said as a forced smile curved your lips.
“Oh, come on. You don't even have a little time ? Per me ?” he asked, tilting his head slightly to the side with the most innocent expression he could master. (For me ?)
Which didn't work because his eyes screamed trouble.
Theo looked like an angel with his brown hair curled in soft locks and eyes as blue as the ocean, although dead and emotionless looking.
Actually, he was the devil in disguise. Especially when he acted all coy like this.
“No Theo, I really don't have time for your little antics today” you said huffing.
‘His little antics’ being eating you out till tears rolled down your cheeks and your mascara was smudged and unsalvageable. 
You and Theo were ‘friends’. You got along just fine, you talked, and you bickered like there was no tomorrow. It was part of your friendship, the teasing, the little harmless jokes. It was routine for the two of you.
What was also routine was the flirting. 
Shameless and obvious flirting.
You never thought it would lead anywhere. You were so used to the little Italian endearments he gave you and the ever present smirk on his lips that you didn't really think anything of it.
Until one night, after one of the biggest parties that Slytherin had ever thrown, you ended up in his bed, with him between your legs eating you out like his life depended on it.
You didn't even know how you found yourself in that situation, you just knew that you hadn't minded one bit.
You ended up with shaky legs and a dizzy brain just by his tongue alone.
Saying that you didn't mind it would've been an understatement.
The day after was awkward as hell, but you both were too direct and honest to not deal with the weird atmosphere immediately.
So you decided to add some…privileges to your relationship. 
You discovered Theo had quite an oral fixation. 
He needed to keep his mouth occupied with something.
Cigarettes were a great way to keep his mouth busy, but they were extremely damaging for his health.
You didn't mean to make him stop smoking, you knew it would've been basically impossible, and, if you had to be completely honest with yourself, he looked so damn hot with those death traps between his lips, but you wanted to at least try to reduce the amount of nicotine that went into his body.
And what better way than to bribe him with the second thing he loved the most in the world ?
Eating you out seemed to be his favorite hobby.
Anytime he felt the need to light one cigarette more than necessary he came to you, with that sinful smirk on his lips and the hottest ‘fuck me’ eyes he could master.
And who were you to say no ? 
You had proposed the deal in the first place.
Plus, he was amazing at it too. The way his tongue worked on your cunt definitely felt like ascending to heaven.
But now you really didn't have the time.
“I'm not here because I feel like smoking, Y/n” he said walking up to you and stopping in front of the desk, leaning forward a little as he supported his weight with his hands on the table. 
You made the mistake of lifting your eyes from the parchment and locking them with his. His gaze was magnetic. Once those pools of stormy sea caught you, you couldn't escape.
“Then why are you here ?” you asked, raising your eyebrows.
“Cause I'm starving, bambolina” he uttered with the calmest and most unaffected tone in his voice. (babydoll)
You narrowed your eyes.
“Then you should be in the kitchen to solve that little problem, don't you think ?” you asked rhetorically, eyes going back to focus on the parchment in front of you.
You heard him scoff, and suddenly he was leaning so much closer.
Your head was still hung low, trying to write that damn essay, but his presence was distracting as hell and you couldn't help but shiver when he leaned to whisper in your ear.
“You're right, that would be the perfect solution if I was hungry for food” he stopped and you could feel the teasing smile plastered on his face.
“But all I'm craving is you and that pretty little cunt of yours, so I don't think the kitchen elves could really help me with that”
You wished you could say his words didn't affect you, you really wished.
But the sudden warmth on your cheeks and the unconscious clench of your legs told another story.
You really didn't have time for this, but your body was craving him and his touch like crazy, and you weren't sure you would've been able to focus if you didn't feel his tongue working its wonders on you.
So you sighed and pushed the chair you were sitting on a bit farther away from the desk, enough to take your knickers off and throw them somewhere behind you, then you sat back, your skirt still covering you up until your mid thighs.
His eyes darkened with lust.
“Make it quick, I have an essay to finish” you said, faking indifference.
On the inside you were burning alive.
“Quick ? It's like you don't know me at all, dolcezza” he said with a scoff as he sank to his knees, crawling until he was right in front of you.
His gaze locked in yours as his hands made contact with the bare skin of your legs, caressing them gently, tenderly.
“I'll take my sweet time with you. Ora fai la brava and open those gorgeous legs for me” you hated how fast you complied, but with the way he was looking at you you really couldn’t help yourself. (Now be good) 
He lifted your skirt and he leaned forward.
As soon as his tongue made contact with your folds you melted.
You choked out a whimper, and you could feel him smirk right against your groin.
"Wipe that grin off your face, Nott, I'm only -ah fuck, I'm only doing it because you begged me” you said as he kept lapping at your core with his tongue, wrapping his lips around your clit to give it a gentle suck.
The moan that rippled out of you was almost pornographic.
“Piccola bugiarda, you know that's not true. You're doing it because you want it too” he moved his mouth from your cunt to your thighs, giving feather light kisses on the sensitive skin. (Little liar)
“You're so wet, you didn't think I would notice ?” he asked with that fucking cocky attitude that made you go crazy.
“Shut up and put that mouth to a better use” you said, but the bite in your voice was definitely toned down by the urgency and neediness of having his mouth back where you needed him the most.
His head tilted to the side as he leaned back just the tiniest bit.
“What's with the attitude, uh ?”
“No, no, no, -shit Theo. Come back here” you said, almost whining.
He was too far, and you needed him.
You needed him closer, way fucking closer.
“E come si dice ?” he teased, his eyes were dark and fogged up by lust and hunger. (And what do you say ?)
“Fuck, why do you always want me to beg ?” you asked, defeated. He leaned forward again, his breath hovering right above the tender skin as you clenched around nothing, feeling the loss of his tongue.
“Because it's fun, I love it when you beg me with that sweet mouth of yours. Plus I like seeing you flustered” he said as he started to kiss every inch and nook of your most sensitive area, avoiding where you really wanted him to.
You wanted to curse so bad, but you knew that was not what he wanted, what he needed.
“Theo -fuck. Please Theo, just touch me. Please” you surrendered, your voice whiny and broken, until a melody of moans and whimpers started to ripple out of your lips as soon as his mouth met your folds again.
And this time he didn’t stop.
He lapped at your juices like a starved man enjoying his meal for the first time in days.
He licked, and sucked, and kissed every centimeter, every inch of tender skin like he was born to do that.
Your hands buried in his soft brown locks and you tugged at them unconsciously after a particularly good roll of his tongue made you see stars.
“Cazzo, se continui così verrò nei pantaloni porca puttana” he said, hissing. His mouth kept working wonders on your cunt, his groans creating delicious vibrations on your clit. (Fuck, if you keep this up I'll come in my pants, holy shit)
“Ancora” he said between ravenous licks and delicate, teasing sucks, guttural moans leaving his lips. (Again)
“What ?” you asked, lost in pleasure. Your little knowledge of the Italian language became nonexistent when he was busy making you cry on his tongue.
“Again, baby. You know i fucking love it” he says, mouthing the words right against your core.
And so you obeyed, tugging at his hair again, a little rougher, a little harder.
A low groan left his lips.
You were close, you were so fucking close.
“Shit, Theo, baby” you moaned out loud, the term of endearment completely slipping out.
Theo seemed to notice, because he started to go faster, tongue flicking desperately at your folds.
Your breath got caught in your lungs, your ears rang and your sight turned black as you got hit by pleasure.
The hand on his hair kept Theo close as you rode your orgasm on his tongue.
He lapped at your juices carefully, to not overstimulate you, leaving sweet butterfly kisses on your thighs, worshiping the skin with his lips.
Once your breathing started to go back to normal and your sight was not blurry from the pleasure anymore you looked at him.
He was still kneeling in front of you, a teasing smile tugging at his lips as his eyes focused on your face.
“You look quite disheveled, principessa” he said with a chuckle, pride oozing from his features for reducing you in that state. All fucked out and breathless. (princess)
“Oh, yeah ? And whose fault is that ?” you asked in mocking shock, but you couldn't help a chuckle from escaping your lips.
“And you're one to talk” you added as you took in his appearance. His eyes were still quite foggy and unfocused, his hair a mess from all the tugging, and his lips.
Oh, his lips. Red and shiny with your essence and the tiniest bit swollen.
He looked too fucking good to be true.
You knew you folded too easily when Theo was involved, but you couldn’t help it.
“I told you I was starving, you underestimated my eagerness to fucking devour you” he said with a shrug, wetting his lips to savor your taste once again, like his words didn’t make you feel like you were catching fire.
That mouth of his was a menace, physically and metaphorically.
“I’m never gonna be able to finish this stupid essay now” you said almost desperately.
He laughed at your pathetic whining, but it was a warm laugh, not one made to mock you but one that was closer to endearment.
“Was it so good that it melted your brain off ?” he asked with that cocky grin of his.
You looked at him with a deadpan expression.
“Your overly confident attitude never fails to amaze me, Theodore Nott '' you said with a chuckle. You straightened your posture on the chair, smoothing out all the wrinkles that he had left from fisting your skirt and holding on for dear life to keep your hips still.
“Now I don’t want to kick you out, but I really need to finish this”
“No need for that, tesoro, I’ll leave you to it. Wouldn’t want to distract you too much” he said, getting back up on his feet and tucking a rebellious strand of your hair behind your ear.
“See you at dinner ?” he asked. 
You simply nodded your head yes.
His hand was still gently caressing your cheek, the pads of his fingers were as light as a feather as they danced on your skin.
His eyes were locked in yours, and you had no idea of what was happening.
Until his fingers reached your chin, tilting your head up the slightest bit. 
Then he leaned in.
For the first time since you had started this ‘arrangement’ his lips met yours.
And they were sweeter than you thought, gentle, but there was an undertone of hunger, of neediness that you couldn’t ignore.
He tasted of nicotine and butter beer, bittersweet and addicting.
His lips were slightly chapped but you couldn’t care less about it as his tongue swiped on your bottom lip, his teeth grazing at it gently right after as he carefully bit the plump skin.
He pulled back slowly and you were left speechless.
He just chuckled at your wide eyes and agape mouth.
“Good luck on your essay, ok ? I’ll see you tonight” he left a quick kiss on your cheek before storming out of the door with a smile on his face.
Your thoughts were all over the place, because what the hell had just happened ?
Did Theodore Nott just kiss you ?
Something a little different from my usual marauders content, but he's been stuck in my brain for weeks now, and I couldn't help myself 😔
And honestly, as an Italian girl, I really think Lorenzo Zurzolo should be classified as a national treasure, thank you for coming to my ted talk.
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pomefioredove · 6 months ago
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So idk if I'm requesting in the right place. But I would love a twst scenario with a yuu that just says all their intrusive thoughts. Like just out of NOWHERE, as they reach for a water bottle hanging out with the first years they go.
“I robbed a house back home”
Or when Azul tries cornering them with the twins for something they just blankly turn to Floyd going.
“duck off you look like you can't steer a shopping cart”
But feel free to do it with whoever you want and if you don't want to do mine that's perfectly fine and I hope you have a great day :)
certainly!!
summary: reader who speaks all their impulsive thoughts type of post: headcanons characters: heartslabyul, octavinelle, scarabia, diasomnia additional info: platonic or romantic, reader isn't specified to be yuu, reader is gender neutral author's note: for some reason I had the hardest time thinking up new nonsense, so many of these dialogue lines are from lewis carroll poems, which I have a wonderful nostalgia for. check those out as well!
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Ace and Deuce are pretty much used to you saying whatever's at the top of your mind... with no filter
so used to it that it barely even registers with them anymore
whenever it's quiet, they can expect you to come out with some incomprehensible nonsense.
if you didn't, they'd probably ask what's wrong
"I robbed a house back home,"
"Yeah, okay,"
Riddle, on the other hand, gets frustrated alarmingly fast
despite running an entire dorm based on nonsensical rules, he has a low tolerance for outside nonsense
and... well, despite his name, he's not really a fan of riddles
Trey matches your energy immediately
no joke. he doesn't even bat an eye
"I eat plastic,"
"hm. sometimes I eat muffin wrappers,"
honestly, sometimes his tangents get even weirder than yours
Cater probably wasn't listening very closely when you first started going off, or maybe he's just become accustomed to riddles, though the next time you say something he just thinks it's cute
might use your "thoughtful anecdotes" as a caption for his next post
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would it be surprising if I were to say Azul is used to randomness?
Floyd has a tendency to say the strangest things out of nowhere, after all, and the sea itself can be a surprising place
he does not, however, appreciate how you keep speaking in tongues when he's trying to have serious business conversations with you
(seriously, how hard can it be to swindle one person?!)
"Please, just talk normally,"
"But the mome raths outgrabe!"
he doesn't know what that means, but it sounds like an insult
...and then will refuse to converse with you again until you're in a "better mood" (in his own words)
Jade, on the other hand, finds you quite fascinating
he keeps a little notepad on him just to jot down the things you say. why? you can't imagine. he just finds it interesting, you suppose
"'Twas brilling..."
"Really? How interesting. Go on,"
Floyd isn't really paying much attention
your funny words amuse him at best and annoy him at worse
if you ever find yourself in a bad place with the octotrio, you can just say something like:
"You look like you can't steer a shopping cart,"
and Floyd will take actual offense to that, and just straight up leave
(much to Azul's dismay)
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Kalim adds on right away
and keeps going
and keeps going... and keeps going...
"How doth the little crocodile improve his shining tail..."
"Oh, I know! He pours waters on every shining scale,"
at one point Jamil has to pull you aside and beg you not to encourage him
"No promises!" is your answer
Kalim even buys a parrot to add onto the fun
it becomes a three-person (or two-person-and-a-bird?) act
...even if you're not really doing it on purpose
Jamil is who ends up taking care of the parrot while it squawks your old nonsense thoughts, though
he likes the parrot much better than either of you
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Malleus will entertain you based on his own curiosity
none of his other human classmates speak in such odd and puzzling words, so he knows it's a "you" thing
might try to solve them if they sound like riddles
but he mostly just thinks they're cute
"O, oysters, come and walk with us,"
"How interesting... I do wonder where you come up with all this,"
Sebek will listen to you because Malleus does, and Silver has enough nonsense to deal with as it is. will definitely fall asleep while you're talking to him
Lilia responds in like terms
meow at him? he'll meow back
in fact, he'll meow at you every time he sees you until you say something else to capture his curiosity
might go ahead and start speaking to you in tongues before you even say anything
he just thinks you're neat!
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shurisasthmaticgf · 4 months ago
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oh baby he down bad: charles leclerc x black fem! reader
summary: three times when you realized you truly did have your boyfriend wrapped around your finger
warnings: crying, period mention, swearing
blog moved to @delewlew
author's note: this is the first charles fic i've written so please be kind...i hope you all enjoy it. i'm sick with covid and i was loopy on meds when i wrote this so i hope it makes sense 💀 comments and other feedback are welcome and appreciated!
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whoisyn uploaded a story!
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you laid in your bed curled into fetal position with your phone mere inches from your forehead. the room was dark but light enough to see half of your face as your eyes welled with tears. you rambled, "a few weeks ago when i was visiting new york i bought a bunch of takis and nerds clusters because they don't sell them over here in monaco and i went to go get a bag of both and i didn't know i ran out! i'm so upset i don't even want to settle for anything else." you wailed loudly, mixing in a few laughs at how ridiculous you probably looked but you had no shame as you hit post.
the entire day had been going pretty shit from the moment when you woke up and bled through your favorite pajamas to nearly passing out when you wanted to have a relaxing hot shower to make you feel better. now you were just laying in bed clinging to your body pillow that had lingering notes of your boyfriend's cologne. it was early in the night but your entire body felt like it was hit by a bus and you were one tylenol away from needing a stomach flush yet it didn't actually feel like it was helping. to make things worse, all you wanted was your boyfriend but he was supposed to be going out right after he got off of work.
you laid stiff in your bed in an obscure position because you found that was the only one that didn't make you feel worse. the door to your bedroom opened and your boyfriend entered wearing pajama pants and no shirt. you squinted through the dim light and mumbled, "babe? thought you were going out tonight? you had that thing." charles placed two bags of your favorite snacks onto your nightstand and responded, "i was but i found out through twitter that my girlfriend was crying at home." you turned your face away from him out of embarrassment because you were literally crying over chips and candy. he turned your chin back to him, "why didn't you call me, mon cœur?" you shrugged and reached for the bag of candy, "it wasn't that serious." he pulled you closer to him and you shifted positions so your head was against his chest. charles pressed a kiss to your forehead, "anything that bothers you is serious to me, darling. but, i am here and you have your snacks so we can watch your movie like we always do, yes?" you nodded and turned on Princess and The Frog which was one of your comfort movies since childhood.
whoisyn posted a story!
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replies:
lilymhe WHP IS YOUE DEALER PLS 🙏
↳ whoisyn lemme ask charles
francisca.cgomes feel better bby <3
↳ whoisyn thank you so much ily ily ily ❤️
logansargeant i still have like 3 bags of hot cheetos and those nerds things for you from when you asked me to grab you some when i had a layover in new york
↳ whoisyn omg i forgot abt those! i'll get them next week if u bring em. ty ty.
alex_albon lily wanted me to ask you who your dealer is? she said you'd know what she meant
↳ whoisyn oh my bad pookie i forgot...but charles said he just has a stash of american snacks at his place for me. i'll bring her some next weekend tho dw ❤️
↳ alex_albon THANK YOU OMG I COULD KISS YOU RN - lily
˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗
you cut through one of the alleyways out of street view once you noticed someone had been recording you as you walked through the streets of monaco. most of the time you managed to sneak through the city without being spotted but today you had to make a trip to the mall where a handful of people recognized you immediately. as someone who was never in the public eye and lived as a "regular" person you were still getting used to people recognizing you and following you around. time and time again you'd gone viral for your fan responses when they asked for pictures or autographs, usually a laugh and "why, i'm not the famous one?" you were genuine with your interactions and were known for helping fans get autographs or deliver fan letters to charles at grand prix weekends. although you enjoyed this aspect of his fanbase, sometimes it was too much and you just wanted to live in peace like you used to. so you'd learned every back road and sidewalk to your shared apartment for quick escapes.
the alleyway was quiet and away from the few people that were walking and talking beside you. just as you were to round a corner you heard a soft meow. stopping dead in your tracks you looked around confused to where the sound was coming from. there was silence then another meow, and another, and another until you realized a small orange cat a few meters away was the culprit. the tiny kitten was shaking and wet in some fluid you only hoped was water, but by the smell it was definitely sewage, pipe, or garbage juice. you wrinkled your nose and held the helpless fur ball in your palm, "shit...what the fuck do i do?" the kitten nibbled on your thumb and you stretched your finger away, "don't do that i don't want rabes or whatever cats can carry." you looked over your shoulder and sighed, "well i guess i have a cat now... let's go."
once back in your apartment you put the small kitten in your bathroom tub on an old rag. the small animal meowed and mewed the entire time you rinsed it off with the only soap you had that was safe according to google. instead of drying it's fur with your blowdryer you just towel dried it which he continued meowing. you'd never had a cat and didn't know what it meant when kittens meowed so you just started rambling, "well that's so interesting you feel that way because i literally said the same thing too! like i don't even know why that would make sense because when you really think about it they always want you to think that but in reality the truth is the complete opposite of what they want you to believe." the orange kitten looked at you with its head turned to the side and you sighed, "i don't know what you want from me man i just met you." the cat meowed louder and you mumbled, "that was definitely a cuss word but i'll let it slide."
an hour later you had given the kitten a small amount of some canned tuna and it fell asleep curled into your neck against the towel you kept it wrapped in.
charles entered your apartment with his eyes on his phone as he called out, "i'm home- oh." he usually expected you to be in your room so when you were out in the main room on the sofa he was startled. you sipped from the smoothie you'd gotten from the fridge and looked up from the book you were reading, "hi baby." charles stared at the kitten on your chest then back at you, "hi beautiful." he waited for you to say anything about the new addition and when you didn't he prompted, "what do you have there?" you looked at your hand and held up the cup, "a smoothie." you took a long sip and the straw crackled loudly, "oh yeah i figured out how to make that one hailey bieber has at that overpriced place in LA. it's actually really good i see why people lost their shit over it."
your boyfriend nodded slowly and pointed to the kitten on you, "my love, please tell me why is there a cat on you." for a minute you looked at him as if he was making it up but then you realized you never got around to actually texting him what happened. he waited for you to explain because the story had to be good if you, notorious anti-pet owner, came home with a cat and let it sleep on you.
you told him while looking at the kitten, "yeah, you're a daddy now." charles replied with too much ease, "i know that you call me that but that cat does not." you looked up with an exasperated glare, "can you be serious for one minute please." charles chuckled and apologized, "okay okay you go, tell me why i am now both of your daddys." you raised your hand to throw one of the clean rags you hadn't used at him which he shielded his face from, "okay i'm sorry go ahead." as you retold the entire thing charles just stood there with a fond smile, finding the whole ordeal quite amusing. at the end of your story he reached for the kitten and pulled back his hand, "why is it slippery?" you answered, "i put coconut oil on it so it didn't get ashy." charles started laughing once more and you smacked his shoulder lightly, "hey i never had a pet besides a fish okay! i'm trying my best here." charles pulled you into a hug and pressed a kiss to your lips, "and you're going to be a great cat mom too, you've already done a good thing."
whoisyn
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liked by charles_leclerc, f1, and 44,304 others
whoisyn happy birthday son to my son chisme octavius nortorious C.A.T. l/n-leclerc
view all 12, 079 comments
username1 WE THOUGHT IT WAS JUST CHISME LMAO WHY WOULD YOU NAME HIM ALL THAT-
whoisyn chisme bc if you pretend to gossip he'll immediately listen and start spilling tea too. octavius because charles said it sounded regal, and notorious C.A.T. for the culture.
↳ username2 LMAO YALL KINDA ATE NGL
charles_leclerc my two loves ❤️
username2 i need limited edition chisme x ferrari merch @/scuderiaferrari
↳ scuderiaferrari 👀
olliebearman i miss my brother
↳ whoisyn he misses you too <3
username3 i remember when y/n first found him, i can't believe he's a year old already :( he's so big now
username4 i thought charles said he wanted a dog
↳ whoisyn well i didn't find a dog, i found a cat. so we have a cat.
˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗
the video had circulated on twitter only a few hours after it dropped and you'd noticed your name trending on the internet. after making the mistake of checking why you were trending once, you'd never really paid much attention to it again. the first time many people were shaming you for dating your boyfriend and making jabs at your physical appearance. rather quickly you realized it would be better to just keep up with silly memes your friends sent to you opposed to stalking every corner of the internet to see what people were saying about you.
this specific instance was charles in an interview and he'd mentioned you briefly while playing a game of this or that:
"do you prefer a weekend getaway to the coast for a snorkeling trip or the mountains for a skiing adventure?" the interviewer quizzed charles on his current vacation preferences. the driver asked, "is this by myself or with people?" the interviewer answered with a small smirk, "you and one other person- can be anyone, best friend, sibling, girlfriend, mom, etc." charles let out a laugh and knew what the interviewer was getting at and chose to went along with it for fan service. he thought for a moment then answered, "i think the snorkeling trip, my girlfriend likes this kind of thing with the fish, sea animals, and the diving in the water. that and she is better of a skier and snowboarder than me so..." out of the frame the interviewer laughed and joked, "a little mermaid moment, i love it."
you looked at the video and laughed when you noticed the small hello kitty band aid on his hand. earlier that week he'd gone with you out to the sea and you'd found a small cove to swim around in. somewhere along the way back charles had cut his hand on a rock and you'd put a little band aid on it from the only stash you had, and he had no complaints over the pink cartoon design. he found it cute and whenever he looked at it he was reminded of you.
whoisyn
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liked by charles_leclerc, sanrio, and 53, 432 others
whoisyn oh, he look so cute wrapped around my finger 🎀
view all 12,855 comments
username1 SLIDES 5 AND 6-
alex_albon drop the link for the shirt
username2 CHARLES GOT THAT SHIT AWNNNN 😤😤😤
↳ comment pinned by creator
hellokitty we love to see this 🤩
↳ whoisyn omg pls sponsor me 😍
↳ sanrio check DM! ❤️
f1 i'd play mermaids there
↳ whoisyn we did 🤭
↳ landonorris WITHOUT ME? 😞
↳ danielricciardo X 2 💔
↳ georgerussell X 3 😪
↳ whoisyn my bad...next time we'll send a text
username3 oh baby he's down bad
username4 no way in hell she got this man in hello kitty pants after a long day of playing mermaids 💀
↳ username5 just say ur a loser who doesn't know how to have fun
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˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗
the end.
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rafeandonlyrafe · 7 months ago
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followed (part one)
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words: 1.2k
warnings: stalker (not rafe), violence, rafe beats someone up but the guy is a creep
followed (part one) / accused (part two)
“hey.” you whisper, ducking under the man's outstretched arm as he looks at the various snacks on the shelf. “pretend you know me, please. i'm being followed.”
rafe doesn't really question it, wrapping his arm around your shoulder and smiling down at you, just as a man turns down the aisle. 
“there you are, baby!” you put on a big smile, eyes still wide, telling the truth of your feelings as rafe can see how nervous you are. “been looking all over the store for you!”
rafe can see the guy, overdressed in lots of layers of jackets, physically deflates when he sees you're no longer alone and defenseless.
“sorry, babe. i got caught up with the snacks.” rafe laughs, grabbing a random bag off the shelf and dropping it into his basket. 
“its okay.” you shake your head. “just happy we're back together.”
rafe keeps you close to him, arm wrapped around your shoulder as the man moves away. you let out a sigh of relief, head tipping forward to rest against rafes chest.
“thank you.” you say before straightening up and taking a step back.
“no problem.” rafe could tell how pretty you were from the moment he saw you, but now that you're not riddled with nerves, he can see that you're gorgeous. he shifts the basket to his other hand as he reaches out. “im rafe.”
“y/n.” you shake his hand, palm still slightly sweaty.
“let me stick with you while you shop, yeah? just in case he comes back.”
“oh my god, i would really appreciate that.” you lay a hand over your chest. “i dropped my basket a couple aisles back when he turned down the same row.”
rafe follows you, keeping his head on a swivel. he knows he can take the guy, he looked on the older side from the brief glance rafe had at him, but that doesn't mean he wants to get surprise attacked.
“i don't have much more that i need to grab.” you explain to rafe, walking just a step in front of him, causing you to turn down the aisle first.
you gasp and back up into rafe when you realize the same man is now hovering over your basket, waiting on you to return to it.
“i got you.” rafe whispers, dropping his basket, causing it to clatter against the floor. the man glares and doesn't back off like rafe was hoping he would.
“back away from my girls shit.” he growls out, dropping his voice. 
“oh yeah, what are you gonna do? beat me up and then get arrested? there's cameras everywhere.” the man says, taking a step forward.
rafe is quick to reposition himself to stand in front of you. “and then those same cameras will see you following my girlfriend all over the store. get out before i beat your ass.”
the man looks rafe up and down before rushing away, hopefully finally actually leaving.
“shit.” you let out a whine, causing rafe to quickly whip around to face you, seeing tears welling up in your eyes.
“hey, you're safe now.” rafe says, placing his hands on your shoulders, gently rubbing them. when the tears break loose and slide down your cheeks, he pulls you forward into his chest, allowing you to sniffle until you've got yourself under control.
“sorry.” you laugh awkwardly, wiping away the tears before realize you'd left most of them as a stain on rafes shirt.
“it's okay.” he says. “men who mess with women and kids are the worst.”
you nod in agreement. “i don't know how to thank you…”
“you can thank me by not wasting your tears on that creep, alright?”
you nod as rafe grabs your basket, not handing it to you as he picks up his own. “what else do you need to get?” he asks.
“um, just some snacks.” you follow rafe as he confidently walks through the store.
you finish your shopping together before heading to the checkout. rafe doesn't even let you argue as he pays for what you have in your basket, a little shocked by how much he makeup costs, but he knows it won't dent his bank account.
“shouldn't i have paid for you since you helped me?” you ask as you walk out of the store, glad that the parking lot is lit up with street lights, as the sun has set.
“nah.” rafe just smiles at you. “now where's your car? wanna make sure you get in safe.”
you lead him towards your jeep, watching his muscled arms as he puts your couple bags into the trunk.
“thanks so much. i… i don't even want to think about what would have happened to be if you weren't there.” you take a deep breath.
“hey, don't worry about it.” rafe watches you climb into your car, giving him a small wave before taking off. rafe watches you leave, turning out onto the street before walking to his car. 
hes about to pull out of his parking spot himself when he sees a beat up sedan sat in the darkest spot of the lot, right under a burnt out light. rafe squints into the darkness, letting out a growl when his suspicions are right. 
he leaves his car, not bothering to sneak as he walks up and taps on the window. the man is disgruntled but rolls it down.
“there's cameras in the parking lot too.” he says.
“yeah, but it's pretty dark right here.” rafe looks around before reaching into the open window, holding the man by the collar while his other fist pummels into him, hitting his face over and over until it's a bloody, bruised mess.
“that'll teach you to never mess with poor defenseless women ever again, fucking creep.” rafe isn't finished yet though as he spits onto the man, taking the keys out of the car and tossing them away, leaving the man to have so scrounge on the ground for them later.
“shit.” rafe turns around to see your car is back in the parking lot, your eyes wide as you watch him from the drivers seat.
rafe wipes the blood off his knuckles onto the guys shirt before walking over to your jeep.
“im sorry you had to see that.” rafe says as you step out, piece of paper in hand.
“it… its okay.” you shake your head. “im glad you did that.” you're not one for violence, but the creep had it coming.
“are you okay?” rafe asks, not sure why you came back, but he's glad to see you again.
you stick your hand out, giving the paper to rafe. “came back to give you my number. can't believe i left without doing that.”
“ah.” rafe smirks. “seeing me beat up that guy didn't make you change your mind?” he sticks the paper into his pocket, knowing he's going to pull it out the second you're gone to save it to his phone then memorize the digits.
“not at all.” you admit, looking down at your feet. “if anything, it makes me like you more.”
“dinner this friday?” rafe doesn't want to wait to plan out your date, needing to know before letting you go when he will see you again.
“that's too far away. how about tomorrow?” 
rafe is surprised how forward you are, but grateful for it as he nods. “ill text you.”
“ill be waiting.”
sfw taglist: @winterrrnight @bejeweledreverie
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reallyromealone · 11 days ago
Text
Title: God what have we done?
Chapter: one
Fandom: encanto
Characters: Encanto ensemble
Fic type: fluff, angst, hurt to comfort
Pairings:
Warnings: male reader, reader insert, darkish Bruno, ten foot tall Bruno, Omega male reader, omegaverse, fluff, Bruno needs a hug, so does reader
Notes: I wrote! I wrote something through my depression! Also I had loved ones over most of October!
Summary: Bruno has to face his realities and accept what's before him.
🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸
Abuela was always deeply protective of her children, wanting to make sure they were truly loved before they were allowed to get married and when she saw how (name) looked at her little Bruno... It wasn't love... Yet.
But she knew that the Omega who sat at Bruno's door every day and sliding notes under knowing he wasn't going to get an answer was going to love that man more than life itself. (Name) Had a determination and respect for himself and others that shocked the woman, knowing omegas could typically be seen as meek and docile especially this day in age but (name)? He wasn't going to let Bruno run away without answers.
"Sweety, just give up " (name)s mother said softly to the Omega who looked at her with distain "there's so many other mates that are more... Suitable" the elderly woman was about to go defend her son when (name) spoke first "so many people demonize him and give up on him, I refuse to be one of those people" his voice holding so much conviction and confidence "it's not his fault that people can't handle what is to come, it's not his fault he's tired and exhausted from people demanding from him and getting mad because he gives what's asked and it's not fair that this town acts like he is an omen when he's a person with feelings! Actual human feelings that you all seem to disregard and- and I will wait here every day till I die if it means he knows I am not those people!"
Then suddenly he grew calm, a look on his face that made (name)s mom step back "even if he refuses to be with me, I will be in his life... I respect him but I just want answers" and then like nothing happened, (name) returned to waiting at the seers door. Upset and furious, (name)s mom reaches towards him "pardon me, is there a problem?" Abuela finally stepped in, the parents turning and going rigid when seeing Abuela "we are handling our son, how long do you expect him to wait for your son to get his act together?!" Abuela looked them up and down, head tilted slightly as if assessing them for any potential threat and deeming she could probably take em verbally "well (name) is a guest of ours and I don't appreciate it when people disrespect my guests in my own home... Wouldn't you agree?"
"He's ou--"" and as I'll repeat again, my guest now please do find your way out as it's almost time for dinner" Abuela didn't leave room for argument, the Alpha couple leaving with a huff and (name) sat there, fidgeting "thank you..."
"Did you mean that?" She asked genuinely, staring at the other with slight suspicion "I want nothing more than to make him happy, if he wants me gone... I'll go but I will never stop caring for him but till he forces me away, I'll be here waiting for when he's ready to talk" the elderly woman knew that the young man would be great for her son, he needed someone like (name) to whip him into shape "you have my blessing, don't make me regret it" the woman turned around and began walking away "dinner is in one hour, don't be late or Casita will drag you there"
(Name) Smiled brightly at her words and let out a joyful chuckle, a bit wet from tears after the heated argument with his parents, Turning to the door (name) knocked gently "please Bruno... I just want to talk"
He didn't expect an answer, he never got one but he held hope that his words got to the other.
Turns out Casita was rooting for Bruno and (name).
The words echoed through the seers room, his sweet voice hitting the man's ear drums and making him melt.... There were times he was so tempted to go down there and not be a coward.
"Shit..." Bruno looked at his empty packet of cigarettes, annoyed and frustrated... His sisters won't get him cigarettes and his mom definitely wouldn't... God damn it.
Bruno snuck down to his door, closing his eyes before opening the ornate wooden door, the cold brass knob almost burning him with warning as it creaked open.
He knew he should have stayed in his room.
(Name) Was shivering, sleeping tucked away into himself while waiting for a chance to see Bruno and get an explanation the man wasn't sure how to give.
"I'm no good for you..." Bruno whispered while crouching, even doing this action he ftowered over the other...
"Why would you want to be with someone as cursed as me? Huh?" Bruno gently wiped a stray tear from the sleeping omegas face before standing up, planning to sneakndown the steps. "Casita!" The man growled out while the house made the stairs move upwards like an escalator with every step while the rBrunoailings shook angrily "I .! Yo dad's du have to understand!" He grovwled out and tried to outrun the stairs to no avail.
"Bruno?" The Alpha froze at the sound of his omegas voice, turning to see the beauty himself, hair tussled from sleep and clothes messy "(name)..." Bruno felt the air leave his body when he looked into those glassy eyes... Casita deciding to speed things along and force them closer and before Bruno knew it, be was right in front of the poor thing.
"You look tired..." (Name) Whispered, gently touching the others face and tracing his cheekbone, the stubble on his face tickling the others palm "you don't look too great yourself..." Bruno fired back playfully and took in the tired expression of the other fully... This was his fault...
"Why were you hiding, Bruno?" (Name)s voice was barely above a whisper, the Omega oozing distress and worry... "I-" Bruno never felt this fearful, the man usually had some remark or comeback but those eyes... How dare (name) make him feel so vulnerable?
"Let's go for a walk"
Abuela watched from her window, eyes hopeful for the two who stood like strangers... "Come on brunito... Don't let this one slip away" she whispered, watching the Alpha put his poncho over (name) when he noticed (name) shiver.
It was tense, the two walking beside each other "you cold?" Bruno asked (name) who was slightly shivering, the Omega shaking his head "I'm fine" his voice barely above a whisper. Before he could look up a poncho was tossed at him "don't lie" Bruno said with a slight glare "we don't lie" he knew (name) didn't like lying and the Omega huffed "but we can run away at the slightest inconvenience?" The other challenged, always the defiant one (name) was, never giving up on anything or anyone. It's what made Bruno love him so much.
But god he wished this one time he would give up on him.
"You don't understand--"" then help me understand instead of just running like a scared puppy!"
"I'm not a scared puppy!"
"Really because you look like your tails between your legs! Now be the Alpha you are and talk to me!"
"I saw our future and I leave you alone crying!" Bruno snapped and (name) looked shocked and confused "I-I... I looked when I realized you weren't going anywhere, w-we have children together and I leave you all..."
"Were they cute?"
"That's what you focus on here?!" Bruno was stunned and (name) shrugged "you may be a bit of a coward but you're no fool... I'll understand... You only run to help people even if it's misguided... Can I see the fortune?"
"You sure?"
"Absolutely..."
Bruno led (name) back, through Casita and through his room, the two silent but less awkward.
"They're adorable..."
"You can barely see them" Bruno snorted amused "and? They're ours so they're the cutest"
"But you're crying?"
"Your prophesy is up to interpretation right? We don't know the context, what's right around the corner... Please... Let me be in your life" (name) looked hopeful "I want to meet these children we created"
"Y-you still want me?"
"You're a snarky asshole with a terrible smoking habit but you are the love of my life and I'm not letting you go without a fight" (name) said simply, moving closer to the Alpha who couldnt help but laugh "that so? You think you can take me on?"
"Take you on, take you out, it's quite easy"
"Really?"
"Wanna see?"
"Sure" Bruno was curious but didn't expect a kiss to be planted on his face, standing shocked "see! Took you down!"
Come morning, the official courting began, abuela chuckled when she saw her son being dragged around by the Omega who chatted the annoyed alphas ear off "do you ever shut up?" Bruno grumbled and (name) shook his head "nope! And now you're stuck with me! Now come on! You have some stuff to make up for!"
"Like what?"
Yee high
"Like us going in jfor lunch!
Bruno had his hands full, she could tell.
(Name) Was already bringing out the better in him.
It was quite funny, the cute Omega being followed by the scary guard dog that was the yountgest Madrigal "feel this!" (Name) Was looking at textiles and the Alpha raised an eyebrow "why?" Confused at the omegas words, why would he care? "For your courting gift! I need to know you like the texture, I know you are lucky about that stuff!" (Name) Said like it was the most normal, common sense thing but the Alpha was stun locked.
Bruno let the Omega force him the touch fabric after fabric before settling on a soft green wool yarn, mumbling something about knitting but Bruno stewed mentally about courting gifts.
Fuck what does he get someone for courting?!
"Courting gifts?!" A blinding light hit Bruno's eyes while he sat with his sisters and peppas ray of sunlight over her head "our baby brothers growing up!" Juileta fake cried and Bruno stood up, this was a mistake "wait! Bruno don't leave!" The sisters were giggling at the youngest of their trio who scoffed and lit a cigarette "Bruno! You need to stop smoking!" Peppa hissed as a storm cloud grew over her head and Bruno rolled his eyes at her worry "let's get to the topic at hand" juileta said pulling the bickering two back on the focus "what have you given him so far?"
"Nothing?" He was supposed to do that?
"Bruno, you have been in love with this young man for months and he has come by every day showering you with gifts and you got him nothing!" Peppa fumes and Bruno wanted to scream "we were still working things out!" God he knew he shouldn't have gone to these two! "Well what are you going to get him?!" "That's why I'm here Peppa! Because I don't know what shit omegas like!"
"Juileta is an Omega! How could you not know!"
"Well clearly that's not the focus I had! I was busy trying to not get assaulted with makeup and all that shit you did to me!"
Juileta sighed while Augustus walked into the kitchen curiously "what's all this about?" He asked eating some bread his wife made and his broken finger healed "Bruno doesn't know what to get (name)! He doesn't know what omegas like despite mama and Juileta!"
"Maybe don't focus on what omegas like" Augustus said calmly, a gentle smile towards his in law, he was in his shoes when courting his mate and the stress in the prophet's eyes spoke volumes of the fear of fucking up masked behind his rough exterior "what does (name) like? Think of three things he loves more than anything"
Bruno was quiet before abruptly standing up and walking out of the room, the trio watching curiously "is he not going to explain to us?" Peppa huffed before sipping her coffee, grumbling while her sister patted her back "we will see soon"
It was late, (name) hadn't heard from Bruno all day and decided to check on him and was... "THIS IS FUCKING BULLSHIT!" Jumping slightly at the yelling before rushing up to see Bruno surrounded by the hobbies (name) loved... "What's all this?" Bruno snapped his head up, eyes filled with frustration but softened just a bit when he saw him and his sour scent of rage and confusion had a slight hint of raspberry in it.
Love.
"You're not supposed to be here"
"You were hiding and I got worried..."
Bruno mentally cursed himself while (name) stepped closer "are these courting gifts?"
"... Your hobbies are impossible and fucking awful and I don't know how you don't pull out your hair" (name) mentally translated the man's words to "you're incredibly talented and I have no idea how you do this" and smiled "You were trying to make me a blanket?" The Alpha flushed slightly before shrugging "I wanted you to have a proper mating gift..." (Name) Wanted to cry, kneeling down to the hunched over giant of an alpha and cupping his face "you could paint a rock and I would love it... These are things I love doing because I love making things for others... Why don't you do something you are good at doing?"
(Name) Gently kissed the other, his beard tickling his lips and fingers tracing the others cheekbones "but first, I'm starving and I want to eat food with my mate" "were not mates yet" "yet!" (Name) Rand back down to where he abandoned his basket and returned "I made bread!"
Bruno felt his worries and stress wash away at his beloved, the Omega showing the food he made with so much love... Bruno couldn't think of any reason to make (name) cry....
There were things Bruno was passionate about, his secret hobbies...
And (name) was going to learn one of them.
"Is this a collar?"
"Made of our tablet..."
(Name) Let out a choked sob before looking at Bruno who immediately panicked "why are you crying?! Is it bad?!" His worried voice making (name) smile "n-no! I-I love it so much!"
Bruno took a breath "don't fucking scare me like that..." Gently he put it on (name), the omegas scent was so overwhelming and happy and Bruno couldn't help but pull (name) close and smell the pharamones that clung to him every day...
"I love you"
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benevolentbones · 3 months ago
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as i lay bleeding | spencer reid x reader
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warnings: angst!!!!!!! character death, mentions of injury. gender neutral reader
word count: 1.1k
summary: risks in the field suddenly become very real
a/n: hope you enjoy:) i love writing angst. reblogs & comments appreciated <3 requests open
it was a given statistic that those who worked for the fbi had a lower mortality rate, they would often get injured on the field, times those injuries would result in death.
you had seen deaths occur on the field, you had heard the news of other members in different departments passing during active cases. but you never thought you’d be lumped in with the large sum of losses the fbi had each year, well, until now.
all you could see was the grey sky, murky clouds floating across the monotone heavens. you laid flat on your back, when you tried to move your whole body felt like it was lit aflame.
you let out a breathy wince, hastily trying to find the source of this pain. you shifted your left arm, dragging it against the concrete to move it over your abdomen.
as your soft fingers reached your wound you let out a pained gasp, feeling something large jutting out of your left side. you pulled your hand back, every movement aching, lifting it up to your line of vision.
bright red stained your fingers, dripping down your forearm and staining your, now torn, white shirt sleeve. a jagged breath escaped your lips as you tried to move, once again not succeeding.
so you laid there in a pile of broken glass, on the concrete staring up at the moody sky, bleeding out.
within seconds a lean figure was by your side, you shifted your gaze from the sky to meet big brown eyes. he cradled your head in his hand, moving his other down to your injury, his hand hovered shakily over the large piece of glass soaked in your blood.
“spencer…” you mumbled out, your eyes going in and out of focus, he turned his attention back to your face, he was clear he was trying to mask his panic, you could always see right through his façade.
“hey- you’re okay- you’ll be okay.” his voice was laced with concern, his head quickly whipping around his surroundings for anyone to come to your aid.
“i need a medic! agent down-“ he yelled out, his voice strained. you couldn’t hear much else going on around you, a few distant voices calling back.
you reached your left hand up to rest against his cheek, his eyes glued on you. as your strength weakened, your hand slipped, leaving a red stain on his face.
“sorry..” you mumbled out, making an attempt to wipe away the blood but making it worse in the process,which spencer replied with a choked out chuckle.
even as you lay there bleeding, of course you would find something to be apologetic about. that was just how you were, and he loved that about you.
“you’re okay- hold on. the medics are on the way-“ he couldn’t hold back the wobble in his voice, you knew by how he acted, that he was struggling to maintain his composure. you could feel his hands trembling as he applied pressure to your wound, desperately trying to stop the bleeding.
"spencer" you whispered, your voice barely audible, "i'm so tired."
his eyes widened, panic evident. "no, don't say that. stay with me. hey- keep talking to me."
your vision started to blur, and the world around you seemed to fade away. "it's okay, spence. i'm- i'm glad you're here."
the panic that you once felt about dying slowly slipping away, being replaced by a comforting feeling, but maybe that was just because spencer was with you.
tears streamed down his face as he shook his head, refusing to accept what was happening. "no, you're going to be fine. just hold on a little longer." he chewed on his lip, letting out a breathy gasp “please.” he whispered out.
you tried to muster a smile, but it came out as a grimace. "promise me something."
"anything," he replied instantly, his voice cracking.
"promise me...you’ll look after kevin- i know you don’t like him but.." you referenced the cat you brought into your relationship with spencer, that little ginger fur ball was your absolute baby, you needed to make sure he would be taken care of.
spencer let out a low chuckle, of course you would bring up that dumb cat of yours. “yes- but i won’t need to- you’re going to be okay..” his voice breaking completely. "please, just stay with me. the medics are almost here. you can't leave me."
your eyelids grew heavier, and you could barely keep them open. "i love you, spencer." you managed to mutter out, your eyes fluttering shut for the last time.
spencer's heart shattered as he felt your body go limp in his arms. he clung to you, sobbing uncontrollably, praying for a miracle that he knew deep down wouldn't come. the sounds of approaching medics and shouting voices faded into the background as his world centered on the devastating reality that he was losing you. that he lost you.
morgan ran over, skidding to a halt beside spencer. he took in the scene quickly, seeing the blood, the glass, and the lifeless body in spencer's arms. he knelt down, placing a firm hand on spencer's shoulder.
"spencer," morgan said, his voice gentle but urgent, "we have to let the medics do their job."
spencer shook his head violently, his grip on you tightening. "no, no, they can't help now. they’re gone, morgan. they’re gone." his voice broke completely, and he buried his face against your shoulder, sobbing harder.
morgan's heart ached at the sight. he pulled spencer into a rough embrace, feeling the younger man shake with grief. "i know, man, i know," he said quietly, his own voice thick with emotion. "but you need to let them take them. you can't stay here."
spencer resisted for a moment longer, then finally, reluctantly, let go. the medics moved in swiftly, but spencer didn't watch them. he couldn't. instead, he clung to morgan, who held him up, supporting him as his legs threatened to give out.
"they asked me to look after kevin," spencer whispered, his voice barely audible. "they were worried about the cat."
morgan managed a small, sad smile. "that sounds like y/n. we'll make sure kevin is okay. right now, we need to get you out of here."
spencer nodded numbly, allowing morgan to lead him away. as they walked, he glanced back one last time, seeing the medics covering your body. his heart felt like it was being ripped apart all over again.
"i loved them so much," spencer said, his voice breaking.
"i know you did," morgan replied, his grip on spencer tightening. "and they knew it too. they loved you just as much. remember that."
together, they walked away from the scene, spencer's sobs mingling with the sounds of the bustling crime scene, his clothes stained crimson, one of the last reminders of you.
taglist!! @0108s22m @rainoftearss @potatovoyager @rac00ns-are-c00l4 @luvmia222 @shardsofmarxx @silver138 @lover-of-books-and-tea @thedancingnerdmermaid @khxna @cynbx
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reixtsu · 5 months ago
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Lantern In The Shadows
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Multi character x gn reader! Gender of reader is not specified.
Characters listed in the end!
Genre: Angst (comfort in the end)
Warnings: hints is self harm, mentions blood, darkness, self hate
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He was the light within your darkness, a comforting lantern that stood upon your domain of blood. He was such a breath of fresh air, someone that you could tolerate in the cursed world you resided in.
However there was one thing that bothered you about him-out of all of the people he could have been with, why did he choose you?
In your opinion, you felt that there were plenty of better partners that he could have been with, and definitely have a healthier relationship with. You felt bad because it seemed like you were a burden to him, as you were always feeling down in the dumps.
Besides, you as the darkness did not want to dull the light that you loved so dearly.
The thought hurt so much, that 'he was making a sacrifice for the world by being with you'. You wanted him to be happy, to not deal with you since you were convinced you were a problem, something that should be wiped from this world. The aching in your chest only felt deeper day by day as you found yourself growing more and more distant from him.
Until one day, the medications were not seeming to work anymore. The emotions ran to its climax, and the feelings of negativity deep inside became shadows that blurred your vision.
The pain, it was too much to handle.
It was suffocating, as though you were drowning a cold sea of your own blood. You reached for the knife, hoping to dull out the agoney, only to be stopped.
"My love, what are you doing?" His voice was god-sent, a comforting tone that brought you back to your senses ever so slightly.
He looked at you with such softness, gently holding your wrist to prevent you from hurting yourself. 
Hot tears trickled down your face slowly, leaving traces of saltiness behind as you stared at the ground, ashamed to even look at his radiant gaze. "Don't look at me. I'm...so terrible."
His heart crumbled at your words, a wave of concern and protection washed over him as he took a step closer to you. "Don't say that. You're not terrible."
"But I am!" You cried out, tears falling nonstop as your throat felt dry from distress. "I don't deserve you. I'm such a terrible person, I made so many mistakes, and I never seem to do better!"
You coughed out the words that have been stabbing at your core every single day, but all you could see is blood everywhere, and your demons laughing at you, saying how much of a failure you were.
"I'm... a failure."
Warm arms wrapped around you and shielded you from the blood, demons, and darkness, suddenly making your cold, numb limbs feel lifelike again. Your lover kissed your forehead, a reminder that you were a treasure to worship.
"You are not a failure, or a terrible person," He whispered into your ear as he rubbed soothing shapes along your back. "You are such a great person with many great talents, values, and potencial. You might not see it yet, but everyone around you appreciates you. Take me as an example, I am so lucky to be with someone like you, who cares and takes care of me like no one else does. If you ever harm yourself, I will be devastated."
One sniff, then two sniffles. You tried your best to understand his words as he stared at you with love. You didn't really believe his words, but you knew that you could trust that he was being honest. The blood sea of darkness slowly seemed to fade away as the gentle light gave you a warm embrace.
In that moment, you knew you were loved, and you were worth his love.
    - KAVEH, kazuha, Tignari, Aether, lyney, THOMA, neuvillette, JING YUAN, Gepard, dan heng, SIGMA, Atsushi, Odasaku (BSD), your faves
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Author’s note: This story is meant to be comforting, so I know that I may give some people triggers, it sure gave me a small trigger as I wrote this, but I want everyone to know that people are willing to help those in need, no matter the form.
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roosterforme · 10 months ago
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The Intern Part 3 | Rooster x Reader
Summary: Bradley had an easy way about him that you appreciated. Working for him all summer sounded promising, and you were determined to make it fun for both of you. But as you dipped your toes into getting to know one another on the flights from San Diego to Lisbon, you ended up closer to him than you ought to be, both conversationally and physically.
Warnings: Language, brief mention of drugs (eventually 18+)
Length: 4900 words
Pairing: Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x Female Reader
The Intern masterlist. Check out my masterlist for more. Banner by @mak-32
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"I still can't believe someone is paying me fifty thousand dollars to spend my summer on a yacht," you mused as the private Cessna jet gained altitude over the California desert landscape. 
Bradley turned and looked at you from his plush leather seat across the narrow aisle and smirked. "You needed the money that badly?"
"Don't play games," you told him, and he laughed. "My point is, I would have done this for free just to get Ted off my back."
His fingers tightened a bit on his armrest, knuckles growing white as he closed his eyes and said, "Now you tell me. My department budget could be looking a lot fatter right now if it wasn't for you."
You could feel the airplane leveling out as the flight attendant, a woman named Melissa, stood and made her way back toward the two of you. "Oh please," you groaned, earning one of those grins from him that made you feel light inside. "I know how much the shareholders make, Mr. Bradshaw. It's not like it's not listed on the Nasdaq Composite if you dig deep enough."
"Can I get anything for either of you?" Melissa asked. 
"I'll take an Old Fashioned, please. Hold the cherries," you replied while Bradley just shook his head in a jerky motion.
When Melissa disappeared behind the black curtain, you asked, "Why are you so tense? Have a drink and relax."
He huffed out a laugh. "It's eight in the morning. A drink is not going to help me."
You leaned a little closer, and his gaze definitely dipped down to your unzipped sweatshirt. "Don't tell me you're into something harder?" you asked, already thinking you'd be disappointed by his answer. You'd been there and done that. Hung out with and dated guys who were users, and it was not something you wanted to be around. Even out of your sorority sisters, there were only a handful who weren't high all week during grad school.
Bradley looked at you with alarm. "I'm absolutely not going to allow drugs on the yacht, Ivy League."
"Good," you replied right away, already feeling more at ease as Melissa dropped off your cocktail. "Thank you."
But she was looking at Bradley now as she said, "Please let me know if I can get you... anything."
He waved her off as you took a sip of your mediocre cocktail. Melissa had gone a little heavy handed with the bitters, probably because she was too focused on your hot boss to measure things correctly. "Take a sip," you told him, reaching across the aisle with your glass. "You look like you need it."
He grunted and accepted the drink, and a few seconds later, he had downed the whole thing. "Thanks," he whispered. "I hate this part of traveling to Europe for Avio. The flights are going to take forever."
You narrowed your eyes at him and took back your empty glass while he white knuckled the armrest again. "You were an aviator, Mr. Bradshaw."
When he looked at you again, his cheeks were a little flushed as he softly said, "You don't have to call me that. Bradley is fine." 
"Bradley," you said with a smile, and his face softened a little bit. "Why don't you like the Cessna? I mean, I'd be lying if I said I wasn't also hoping for something at least a little more luxurious from Avio, but it's not that bad."
He shook his head at you, something you were pretty sure you were just going to have to get used to for the summer. But his mustache twitched as he licked his lips and said, "Maybe chartered flights are normal for you, Ivy League, but I got used to being the pilot. Of something much less comfortable than a Cessna Hemisphere. So this just feels inherently wrong to me. I mean, I just drank a cocktail."
"Inhaled," you corrected. "And technically it was my cocktail," you said, waving to Melissa and holding up the glass and two fingers.
"Semantics," he grunted. "I miss my Super Hornet right now. Not only were there no drinks, there wasn't even a bathroom."
You watched Melissa duck behind the curtain again, probably to forget how to make a cocktail again. "Well, we'll be there soon," you told Bradley.
"I doubt these pilots can do Mach 2, so not fast enough for me."
You sighed, knowing this would probably be a lot easier for him if you could get him to drink a second Old Fashioned, but when Melissa dropped two more of them off, they were both garnished with a cherry. "I asked you to hold the cherries."
"Oh, yes. Sorry," Melissa muttered. "I can remove it for you."
"I'm allergic, so I'll actually need you to remake mine," you replied, and Bradley started to hand his back as well.
"Remake hers, and mine too," he grunted, suddenly looking far less nervous about the flight as he made to stand up. "Fresh glasses and everything. I don't want cherries anywhere near her." You looked up at him in surprise as he kind of rolled his eyes and followed Melissa. "I'll make sure she does it right," he whispered, and you watched him walk up to the curtain, as confident as he usually was.
"Thanks," you replied, even though nobody was there to hear you now. Well, he had promised he'd do everything he could to keep you safe and comfortable. You watched as he crossed his arms over his broad chest, and you pressed your lips together. That blue Oxford shirt was the exact best color he could possibly wear, and you wondered if he knew it or if it was an accident that he chose it.
When he met your eyes, you didn't look away. You didn't really care if he knew you were checking him out. Until you did. Because when he walked back with two new drinks, you realized how little you knew about him. "Here," he grunted, voice deep and raspy. Then he clinked his glass to yours before sinking back into the aisle seat opposite yours again and buckling his seatbelt once more. 
"Thanks for doing that."
He smiled at you. "Can't lose my intern on her first day. Especially since I've never had one before."
You perked up, loving that you'd cornered the market. "I'm your first intern?"
"Yeah." He was back to downing his drink and looking miserable now, practically throwing the empty glass aside in favor of gripping the armrest. Abandoning your drink after one sip, you stood and stepped over his outstretched legs, his eyes following your every move as you eased yourself down into the window seat next to him. "You okay?" he asked, looking a little amused now that you were just inches away from him.
"I am, but you're not," you told him with an air of authority. "Just relax," you added as you took his hand from the armrest and held it in both of yours. His brown eyes went a little wider, and his lips parted like he wanted to say something. Probably question what you were doing. But you said, "You'll feel better in a few minutes," as you worked your thumbs along the pressure points in his big, rough palm. And then he closed his eyes and without a word, he leaned back in his seat with his hand cradled in yours. Soon he was sound asleep.
-----------------------
Bradley woke up to an almost pleasant humming sound all around him. His hand was warm and wrapped up in something soft, and when he opened his eyes, your face was just a few inches from his as you slept. His body thrummed with something akin to desire as you pursed your haughty lips in your sleep, long lashes grazing your perfect cheeks. 
Shit. His hand was resting on your body, fingers tangled up with yours and wrapped in your designer hoodie. His knuckles were pressed to the soft skin which was exposed between your high waisted pants and your damn sports bra. And based on the way the plane was started to descend, he'd taken a five fucking hour nap all cuddled up with his intern. With Ted's goddamn daughter.
Hands off. He'd been telling himself to keep his hands off of you, and just a few hours in, he was literally doing the exact opposite. But you'd been sweet to him, carefully massaging the pressure points in his hand until he was able to fall asleep. You must have drifted off then, too. And now he was loath to remove his hand from your body or look away from you.
He needed another fucking drink. Or several. He leaned carefully over you, and sure enough, he could see the New York skyline coming into view through the small window. And he could smell your perfume. And that was when you opened your eyes, immediately sitting up a few inches and nearly bumping noses with him.
"Sorry," he grunted. "I was just trying to see where we were."
"Where are we?" you asked, your voice soft and a little rough from sleep. Jesus, he liked the way that sounded. 
"Almost to New York. Want me to ask the pilot to circle back to Philly so you can wave to your alma mater?"
You laughed and sat up a little more, arching your back, but you didn't immediately let go of him. "No, thank you. I've only been gone for a week, so I'm sure the City of Brotherly Love is enjoying this break."
Bradley found himself continually laughing at your words, but now you were looking at his hand all linked with yours, so he started to pull his free. You didn't stop him, and when you looked up at him, you even asked, "Did you sleep okay?"
He nodded his head once. "I did. Thank you. For making me feel better."
You sat up the rest of the way and stretched, and he had to look away as you said, "A good intern is good at everything."
Your words weren't dirty, so why the hell were his thoughts? He should be trying to find out more about your father, not imagining you wearing a fluffy white bathrobe while you drank an Old Fashioned sans cherry next to his bed. He was miles away in his mind when the plane touched down on the runway before taxiing to the refueling spot. His stomach was growling wildly now as Melissa walked back and offered them a very late lunch. 
"I didn't want to interrupt anything," she said, looking between you and Bradley like the two of you had been all over each other. When she turned away to get the salads and sandwiches ready, you climbed over him to use the bathroom, and Bradley watched you ignore a phone call as you went. He also realized that he'd have to tread very carefully around potential clients over the next few weeks. It was one thing for Melissa to make a comment like that, but it would be something entirely different if a line like that got back to Ted.
While the plane was refueled and the pilots switched places for the longer flight from New York to Portugal, you and he ate in companionable silence. You'd returned to your seat across the aisle, and you ignored another call before tucking your phone away in your bag. Bradley also used this time to drink a gin and tonic in the hopes he'd be able to sleep again, slightly afraid you wouldn't join him on his side of the aisle to make him feel cozy again. 
"We'll be taking off again in five minutes," Melissa informed him as she cleared away the meal and brought pillows and blankets. Your phone was out again now, and you ignored yet another call as Bradley shook his head.
"Are you going to keep me up at all hours of the night on the yacht yelling at your little boyfriend on the phone?"
You scoffed and looked right at him as you said, "I don't date little boys. Are you going to keep me up calling your wife and kids back in San Diego?"
He didn't want to laugh at the way you talked to him and kept him on his toes. He also registered that the way you'd let him hold your hand while he slept had only come from a platonic place if you were just now asking if he was married. "I don't have a wife or kids."
"Why not?" you asked, leaning on your armrest with your tits smashed together. "You could be married. If you wanted. You're tall and you have all your hair."
"Are those the only prerequisites?" he asked, trying not to look anywhere other than at your face. God, your little bikinis were going to be the absolute death of him if he didn't get fucking laid soon.
"No," you replied without missing a beat. "You're smart, too. Handsome. Tons of money. And you seem nice. Good manners. You make me laugh. Seems like someone would have snapped you up off the market by now."
His cheeks felt warm again as he tried to figure out how to answer. You'd just complimented him nine different ways, and he was reeling a bit. "Because I was in the Navy. Nobody in their right mind would trust a Navy guy with that level of commitment."
"Why not?"
"They lie and they cheat," he said, repeating the lines women had been telling him since he was twenty two. "Nobody you'd want to settle down with."
But you didn't look convinced as your smile tilted a little higher on one side. "Are you a cheater?"
He knew somehow he wouldn't get away with speaking anything but the plain truth to you from here on out. "No."
"I didn't think so." You looked satisfied as you settled back in your seat, about to snuggle under your blanket. The sky was a little darker now, and there was nothing below except for the Atlantic Ocean. 
He had a slight buzz from the gin, and he felt a lot better than he had earlier this morning. He reached for his bag and pulled out his laptop before crooking his finger and coaxing you back to the seat next to him. "We have a little work to do, Ivy League."
While he expected you to complain, you didn't. Rather you popped out of your seat with your pillow and blanket, climbed over him and settled in the window seat once more. "What is it?" you asked eagerly, and when he logged in to his email account, he saw something from Ted right away. Just a reminder to keep himself on track.
"I'm going to teach you a little bit about the Avio software we will be marketing, so by the time we land in Lisbon, you'll know as much as I do."
You curled up with your pillow and blanket and looked at him, your words doing more to him than you probably intended. "Don't test me, Sir, or I may end up knowing more than you."
"You're a brat."
-------------------------
This time when you woke up, it wasn't to Bradley's touch or his brown eyes. This time it was to Melissa's laughter and Bradley's soft voice. "When are you flying back to the states?" she asked him as you cracked your eyes open. 
"Not any time soon," he replied smoothly. "We have a lot of work to do."
"Well I hope I'm on your flight back," she said flirtatiously as you propped your head up. 
But Bradley wasn't paying attention to her now as he turned your way. "You're up," he mused, and you just nodded, wishing you'd had time to shower or check how you looked before he saw you. "We'll be landing soon. And then we'll get you and your designer luggage to the yacht."
You watched Melissa roll her eyes at you before she stood. "I'll be right back with coffee and some breakfast."
"Hold the cherries! Please!" you reminded her, just to be obnoxious. When she pretended she didn't hear you, Bradley chuckled. "You know, it's kind of refreshing being given an attitude. Is this how you feel when I give you one?"
His eyes went a little wider. "Don't make me call your father."
"I thought you valued your intern," you replied with a smirk. "So don't make me spread that nasty little rumor around Avio that you went to the University of Bumblefuck."
"Virginia," he snorted.
"Whatever."
Melissa dropped off mugs, a carafe of coffee, cream, sugar and pastries. "No cherry," she said blandly as you reached for a blueberry muffin. 
"Much appreciated," you replied as you peeled back the wrapper and took a nibble while Bradley ate an apple danish in two bites before he poured coffee into both mugs. Clearly the two of you were hungry. You also had no idea what time it was. You had to put your phone on silent since your dad wouldn't stop calling you, even though you told him you'd talk to him when you got on the yacht.
"How do you take your coffee?" Bradley asked as you silently chewed. You went to reach for the creamer, but he pulled it away and looked at you. 
You swallowed down your muffin and said, "Cream and sugar, but you don't have to do it. I should probably be doing it for both of us."
He shrugged and got your coffee fixed up exactly the way you would have made it yourself, as he said, "You and I will be working in close proximity, and I feel like this is the kind of detail I should know."
"Well how do you take your coffee?" you asked, but he set down the cream and sugar without adding anything to his. "Black, no sugar."
"Black, no sugar," he confirmed before taking a sip. You watched the alluring scars on his neck as he swallowed, once again surprised that he wasn't married. He didn't seem as helpless as your father, but he seemed like the kind of person who should have someone warm at home when he returned from work each night. Someone to look after him. 
You took a sip of your own coffee and smiled, because it really was perfect, especially for something that was made on an aircraft. "Thank you."
"Any time," he responded, and you eased back in your seat and looked out the window as the Portuguese coastline came into view. You drank your coffee and picked at the muffin, watching as the very early morning sun made the Atlantic Ocean glitter. There were marinas filled with yachts and sailboats, and you wondered if Avio's was amongst them. 
"Were you on the yacht with my dad last year?" you mused as the plane dipped lower in the sky.
Bradley set his mug down, and maybe it was just you, but his features suddenly seemed a little guarded. You'd always been good at reading people, which made it easy to get a favorable response when you needed one. But he'd never looked at you this way before. "For a few days. One of my buddies from the Navy was there too. Jake Seresin."
You blinked and his expression was neutral again. "The name sounds familiar."
Bradley laughed as the plane touched down. "The face will be familiar, too. Soon enough. He's champing at the bit to get onboard for a few days here and there this summer."
You set your mug down as well and said, "Don't worry, Sir. I'll dazzle him to bits during the dinner parties."
Bradley's nostrils flared, and his pupils grew wider. "I don't doubt that."
When you laughed, he smiled before looking down at his hands. "Well, Bradley, I don't know about you, but I can't wait to get on the yacht. I wonder what kind of caviar the chef will serve for lunch."
You unbuckled your seatbelt, prompting him to do the same. "There are different kinds of caviar?" he asked, one eyebrow raised as he picked up your tote and handed it to you. 
"Don't embarrass me, Bradley. The other interns will all laugh at me behind my back."
But he just shook his head as he moved to the side and said, "After you, Ivy League." So you led the way to the front of the aircraft, thanked both pilots and Melissa, even though she clearly didn't like you, and you climbed down the stairs onto the warm tarmac. 
You shouldn't and absolutely couldn't keep reacting to Bradley the way you were, but when he placed his hand on your lower back and said, "This way," you nearly moaned. You looked up at him as he tried to guide you toward the waiting limousine. "Go climb in. I'll grab the bags."
"I can get my own bags," you insisted.
"I know you can, but you have nine hundred of them, and I'm still hungry, and I can do it faster."
"Fine," you replied, and you could feel his gaze on your back as you walked toward the driver who was holding the back door open for you. "Thank you." As you slid across the leather seat, you watched Bradley effortlessly lift multiple pieces of your luggage at the same time while you bit your lip. What the hell was it about him? You couldn't quite put your finger on it, but he was enjoyable to watch. His voice made you feel a little fuzzy. He was raw and genuine like your favorite pair of well worn Levi's which were tucked away in your Dior suitcase he was carrying with one massive hand. 
You looked away. You counted to ten. You already knew this was going to be an issue, so you weren't sure why it was hitting you now. When you glanced his way again, he was bringing his own two, nondescript pieces of luggage to the limousine trunk, and then he was sliding across the seat next to you.
"Twenty minutes to the marina from here," he murmured, his hand coming to rest on the seat next to your thigh. "And then we can get to work."
You pursed your lips. "I was under the impression we would be playing, too."
He chuckled as you started to look through the compartments next to the seat. "We can play a little bit."
You opened what turned out to be an ice chest, and ran your fingers along a bottle of chilled Dom Perignon. "We can start with this," you said, pulling it free from the ice and holding it up.
He was looking at you, not the bottle, but that little twitch of his mustache was his tell. Even though his eyes seemed stern, he held out his hand, and asked, "Think we can finish it in twenty minutes?" 
You smiled brilliantly as you handed it to him. "Don't ever ask me that again."
"Sassy," he muttered, unwrapping the foil and slowly twisting the cage loose before wiggling the cork free with his big hands until it popped. "Here you go."
"No," you insisted as the driver pulled out onto the main road. "You first. Drink to a successful summer."
Bradley nodded once and took a sip before handing you the bottle. His eyes were on your lips as you pressed them to the bottle where his had just been. "To a successful summer," he echoed, his voice a deep rumble as the city went by in a blur. You couldn't stop smiling, and neither could he, and approximately eighteen minutes later, when he helped you out of the limousine, his cheeks were flushed pink.
"Is that it?" you asked, very slowly removing your hand from his as two men rushed your way in matching gray shorts and navy polos. There was a massive yacht with Down to Business lettered across the back and Avio Technologies along the side.  
"That's it," Bradley confirmed, slipping his black sunglasses on as he reached to shake hands with the two men who introduced themselves as Antonio and Nikolai. Bradley told them your name, and they both took your hand in turn. "She's my intern for the summer," he said smoothly, and then they started to unload your luggage. 
"Let's go," you said, glancing back at Bradley as you started down toward the marina gate, and then he was right next to you again with a few long strides. "I hope you can find your Armani swim shorts quickly, because that pool is calling my name." 
"I can, actually. One of the benefits to only bringing two suitcases." He helped you over the gap, and as soon as you were on the yacht, you felt at home. You knew this was going to be the summer you needed.
"Let's go meet the captain," he murmured, his hand finding your back again. 
"Do you think he has more champagne?"
"Ivy... it's nine in the morning."
"I'm still on San Diego time."
Bradley paused for a beat while he did the math. "It's one in the morning back home."
"Exactly," you told him with a little pout that you knew wouldn't actually faze him. He just smiled as he guided you past the pool you couldn't wait to jump into and an enormous jacuzzi. You walked through a dining room that could seat twelve people and past a fully stocked bar. It was like the best offerings from your sorority house and your dad's estate all rolled into one.
"Welcome aboard!" boomed a voice with a French accent. "We've been expecting you. I'm Captain Marcell." He was probably in his sixties with gray hair and a matching beard, and he reminded you a bit of your favorite professor at UPenn.
"Pleasure," you replied, shaking his hand after Bradley told him your name.
Next to him were lined up two friendly looking women, one with short brown hair and one with long brown hair. Beatriz and Lucia, the stewardesses, would be taking care of everything you needed. And next to them was an attractive man wearing a bit of a scowl. 
"I'm Rocco. The chef. I can make anything. I don't like changing the menu at the last minute."
Oh, you liked him already as you shook his hand. And then your heart fluttered as Bradley said, "I need to speak with you about removing any cherries from the yacht before we leave the marina." 
"Cherries?" Rocco asked, scowling deeper.
Bradley glanced at you as he removed his sunglasses, and his mustache twitched. "Yes. Can't have any onboard. That applies to the kitchen and the bars. My intern has an allergy."
"I'll take care of it," Rocco replied before turning away, and you'd never been more certain that someone would take care of something in your life. Then Captain Marcell handed Bradley a folder.
"Rough itinerary. Weather report for the week. List of phone numbers. Please let me know how long you'd like to spend in each port. I can of course adjust anything as needed. Now if you will select your cabins, Antonio and Nikolai will deliver your luggage."
"Thank you," Bradley replied, handing the folder to you. "You're in charge of this. Now why don't we head down so you can choose a room?" He nodded his head toward a wide set of stairs.
You walked down to the lower deck, and once you and he were alone again, he pointed to the left. "The sooner we get settled, the sooner the swim trunks come out?" you asked softly. 
"Something like that." His soft chuckle was right behind you as you stopped at a mint green door with gold trim.
"Is this my room?" you asked, placing your hand on the doorknob. There was a little keypad next to it. 
"If you want it to be," he replied. "Or, there are three others you can choose from."
"Which one are you taking?"
His eyes flitted from your face to a spot a little further down the hallway. "White door."
When you turned to investigate, you saw a pink door directly across from that one. "Wouldn't it be easier if my room was near yours?"
"Probably." His expression was neutral, but that damn mustache was giving him away. 
"I'll take the pink one."
"Very good. I'll get the room codes from Beatriz, and I'll tell them where to deliver the luggage."
"Great," you replied, still standing close to him, but he didn't move.
"Perfect," he said, brown eyes focused on yours. The hallway was narrow, and now he was placing his hands on his trim hips, taking up even more space. "Try not to get into too much trouble while you look around."
Finally he turned toward the stairs, but you called his name right away. "Bradley?" He glanced back over his shoulder with a questioning look. "Thanks for mentioning the cherries."
"Sure," he replied easily. "I got you, Ivy." Then he was walking back up the stairs and out of sight.
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We are about to set sail. Let's get into a little trouble. Let's have a little fun. Already feeling a little tension between Bradley and Ivy League. Thanks to @mak-32 and @beyondthesefourwalls
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aliorsboxostuff · 1 year ago
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A/N Honestly this is really self-indulgent ‘cuz my instincts went “This mf forgets to eat I just know it.” and turned it into a really fluffy fic lmao. I wrote this with a male Spiderman in mind, but gender-neutral readers are also welcome of course! Hope you all enjoyed it!
Lunch
Tags: Miguel O’hara x m!Reader, Possible gn!Reader, Peter B. Parker, Mayday Parker, mention of Gwen, Fluff, Just taking care our resident dilf, He/him prns, Spiderman!Reader, caring!reader, Emotionally constipated Miguel? Emotionally constipated Miguel., Peter being the best wingman, Mayday being her cute self, Self-indulgent
Miguel O’hara doesn't take breaks. Miguel O’hara only leaves his lair if he’s needed on a mission to set another anomaly straight. So what do you do? Exactly, force him into taking a break… Sorta.
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Miguel O’hara doesn't take breaks. Miguel O’hara only leaves his lair if he’s needed on a mission to set another anomaly straight. Only when his body is finally demanding food does he leave the monitors in the care of Jessica or Lyla while he goes through the cafeteria for a satisfying meal or his favorite Empanadas. So far, if there wasn't a catastrophic event—Which is pointless because he would've seen it before anyone else—Or a Spider-person that needs his immediate help, he keeps himself perched on his platform, monitoring the vast universes, unblinking, the video of him and his daughter playing just on his peripherals. 
“Miguel! How long have you been up there?” Until you.
Another Spiderman that joined the spider society just a couple of months ago has managed to worm his way into Miguel’s thorn bushes. He doesn't even know how, or when, did you start to become a constant in his nonstop monitoring but you did, annoyingly so. Your voice echoes the large room, steps follow suit as you stand at the base of his lair.
You huff, before pulling your mask off and arching a brow while your question is left unanswered. You’ve only done this a handful of times. The day you learned that Miguel O’hara, the guy that doesn't leave his damn perch unless you can hear his stomach rumble a mile away or his body forces him to take a nap, you’ve dedicated a bit of your time to make sure he takes a time off from those screens. Spiderman or not, he still needs rest. 
“Seriously man,” You sigh, considering swinging yourself up to that damn platform. “Have you eaten anything for the last 7 hours?”
Another silence. “You missed lunch, y'know, if it weren't for Lyla I would have thought you died.”
Of course, nothing. You blink, annoyed, before deciding to just turn around and head to the cafeteria yourself. If he won't get food for himself then you will.
At this point, seeing you exit Miguel’s office has been a normal recurrence for the other Spider-people. So when you walk down the corridor, others wave and said their hi’s while you reply back. As much as you miss your universe, hanging out with others of your kind is refreshing. You reach the end of the walkway where it drops before you shoot out webs and swing to where the cafeteria is, cutting your journey short. Who knows how long Miguel has neglected his stomach?
You picked up today's dinner menu, thanking the server, before snagging an Empanada and then swiftly swinging back to Miguel's office. You make your way inside, making sure to not trip on the scattered tech and cables, and to no one’s surprise; he’s still staring at those screens. 
“Here,” You sat the plate and box down on one of the many boxes and tables around his office. “Eat it, or not. I’m sure your stomach will appreciate it if you do,”
You shrugged before swiftly walking back to exit his lair once more, rolling your eyes when he doesn't respond again. Typical.
“I really don't get his problem, I mean, I'm just looking out for him, isn't that what teammates do?”
“No ones ever really brought him food, man,”
“Yeah well he’ll get his own food when he starves, and I don't think the others would like that,” You snicker before landing beside Peter. He was heading to Miguels to report a new potential member so you tagged along, besides you missed holding Mayday. 
“I think he appreciates it though,” Peter presses the button and the door opens, the three of you walking inside. You cross your arm, watching as Mayday starts to scale his dad, her giggles contagious.
“Weird way of showing it,” You huff, eyeing the girl as she starts pulling at Peter's strands before you reach for her, cradling her against your chest and tickling her little body. “No ‘Thank you’? Or y’know, a small ‘thanks’ maybe?” 
She coos, turning her head as if she understands your rambling. You hold her under her arms, then nuzzle her fluffy hair which makes her giggle.  You stare down her eyes, wrinkling your nose. “He’s a little crap isn't he, May?” She cackles in delight which makes you grin.
“Hey, no swearing around the kid,” Peter grumbles and when Mayday makes grabby hands towards her father, you hand her back.
“Says the dad that takes his daughter on missions?” You smirk, lightly punching Pete’s shoulder, making both of you laugh, and Mayday follows suit with her giggles. Finally reaching Miguel’s lair, the man is always on his platform, before Peter calls for him to report. As you watch the platform dramatically descend, this time with Miguel holding a screen tablet and facing you and Peter.
At least he’s not facing those screens this time, you thought. You cross your arms, eye scanning around the room when you spot a clean cafeteria plate on the same table you left it on a couple of hours before. 
“Hey uh…” Peter hums when you start to reach for the plate. “You go on ahead, I’ll be right back,” 
You quickly picked up the utensil and went ahead outside, already swinging your way toward the cafeteria. You peek inside the box and to your delight, the empanada you brought for him is already gone. You smile, humming in relief as you make your way to drop off the plate. You gave it to the staff and threw the box into the trash before you made your way back to the lair again.
A smile creeps its way to your lips and it won't leave, the feeling of a small blooming rose inside your heart as you realize Miguel does eat the food you leave for him. 
As you made your way through the doors, you heard the deep baritone of Miguel's voice conversing with Peter. 
“I don't understand him.” That made your step falter. You swiftly pressed back to the hallway leading to Miguel's lair, making sure to hear their voices clearly, though deep down you knew you shouldn't do this. 
“What don't you understand, man? He just cares about you,” Peter's voice is accompanied by Mayday's giggling. “He brings you food and makes sure you take breaks, I mean, I think that’s a pretty good thing,”
“I know It’s a good thing, Peter. But why? What does he want?”
“Not everything needs to have an ulterior motive, Miguel,” Peter chuckles, you can hear Mayday's laughs too. “Maybe he just wants to. Who knows,”
Then there was silence. You blink, processing the conversation, a million other thoughts fly by you, the biggest was your worry about burdening him. Maybe Miguel doesn't want you to do this, why else would he think you wanted something from him? Maybe you should back down, leave him alone like how everyone else treats him, maybe-
“It is… Nice of him, though,” A sudden rush of heat flows into your cheeks.
“I should thank him, one of these days,” Miguel continued. At this point, Peter should have sensed you but has said nothing. Until Mayday turns the corner and then came crawling into your view, you decided to make your appearance. 
You scoop up the little girl, cuddling her close to your chest. “Hey, kiddo! You shouldn't be back here!”
She cackles, little hands reaching for your strands which makes you laugh. You pull your head up to see Miguel and Peter standing at the end of the hallway, Peter with an oddly smug look while Miguel suddenly turns towards his monitors. “What’d I miss?”
“Nothin’, just done reporting,” Peter shrugs nonchalantly, walking towards you before taking Mayday, “I should head back though, this little spider needs her nap, don't you?” 
Mayday giggles in her father's arm, Peter already waving as he exits the office. “Later, you two!”
“See ya’ Pete!” You wave back, catching May’ little hands waving too before the door closes. 
Now it's just you and Miguel. It's rare seeing him off of the platform, away from that far-away bubble. You’ve only seen him on duty with other Spideys, that's the only time he’s away from the glowing screens. He’s still focused on the screen tablet when you jogged closer. Now that you’re meters away from him, You notice how broad his shoulders actually are, and the slight curls on the back of his head. You clear your throat, looking at anything other than Miguel.
“So… The new recruit Peter gave you? We taking them in?”
“Huh? Yeah, yes.” Miguel shifts slightly, you rub your hands together.
“Alright, cool,” You cringe, the air suffocating with tension and unspoken words. You look around, before deflating, your hand scratching the back of your neck. “Well… I’m gonna go then-”
“Wait.” You stop yourself from turning. “You don't have to keep doing that,”
“Doing what?” You raise a brow, with your mask off and Miguel in front of you, he can clearly see your slightly smug face.
“That. Bringing me food. I don't need it,” Miguel finally pries his eyes away from the tablet, now meeting yours. 
You chuckle. “Last time I checked, you're still human Miguel,”
“I can do that myself,” He steps towards you, which makes you pull up your hands defensively. 
“Alright, sure boss, but you only eat when your body forces you. That can't be healthy,” You huff, crossing your arms and meeting his deep reds. He backs down, looking towards the far wall. 
Great, an argument instead of him just agreeing with me, You sighs, looking down at the concrete floor. What were you thinking? Miguel can take care of himself, of course, he’s a fucking old man and you probably disrupted his old man metabolism or some shit like that.
“I- Thanks.” Your perk up, quickly meeting his still-averting eyes. “That's what I wanted to say. Thanks,”
You smirk. ”Yeah, of course, Miguel,” 
“Maybe… You can let Lyla take over, or someone, and uh…” Shit, maybe this is too bold…
Fuck it. “Join me for lunch, sometime?”
It was a mistake. The deafening silence was clearly a loud rejection from Miguel and you wanted to quickly blurt out something, anything to salvage what you had before, but he beat you to it.
“Sure, sometime,” You whip your head around, almost smacking with how close Miguel and you were standing. His eyes widened slightly, a ghost of a smirk across his lips and it made you gulp.
“Y-yeah, sometimes, yeah,” His brow quirks a bit when you start stumbling your way through his lair. “I should uh- I think Gwen called me so uh-” 
The last thing he saw from you was your stuttering word and your body turning the corner of his office, then a loud ‘Fuck yeah!’ before you disappeared. Truly a wonder how you, out of anyone, managed to pique Miguel’s interest. 
Reblogs are appreciated <3
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krirebr · 11 months ago
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I Don't Want a Lot for Christmas
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Pairing: dark!Andy Barber x f!reader
Word Count: ~1k
Summary: Andy gives you an early Christmas present. Why aren't you happier about it?
Warnings: Dark elements, threats of punishment, implied punishment, it's dark fic but mostly by implication. All of my work is 18+ - Minors DNI
Dividers by @saradika-graphics
Masterlist
A/N: This is for @the-slumberparty Naughty or Nice Challenge. The prompts I used, from the Naughty list, were 23. “I want everyone to know who you belong to.” 12. “Smile pretty for me.” and 19. “No one else is gonna take care of you like I do.” Thank you for the fun challenge, Navy and Roo!
This was my first time writing for Andy, aside from his brief appearance in Don't Touch Me, I'm a Real Live Wire, the winner of this poll. Big thanks to @paperweight91 for helping me figure out my take on him. This is basically just a long drabble, but I hope you all enjoy it!
Any comment, reblog, or ask to let me know what you think will be greatly appreciated. Even if it's just screeching at me. As always, thank you so much for reading! 💜
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You sat stiffly on the loveseat as Andy rummaged around under the tree. You pulled at the hem of your black, sparkly cocktail dress. It was much shorter than you were comfortable with, but you were used to that now—your comfort not mattering. 
He made a noise of triumph and stood up tall, coming back to sit next to you on the couch. He handed you a beautifully wrapped package. “I know it’s a bit early, but I wanted you to open this one before we go to the party. Merry Christmas!”
You’d been dreading his office’s holiday party all week. All those people judging you, all those opportunities to mess up. You took the package and quietly said, “Thank you.” 
He chuckled, lightly. “You haven’t even opened it yet. Go on.”
As you carefully unwrapped the gift, your fingers trembled, uncovering a medium-sized square jewelry box. You took a deep breath, girding yourself before you opened it. Inside was a delicate silver chain with a pendant that spelled AB in elegant script. It took a moment for your brain to catch up, looking up at him as your confusion gave way to dawning horror. 
“I want everyone to know who you belong to,” he said, so softly, so sweetly. It was almost like he hadn’t just given you his brand. “Now is when you say thank you, sweetheart.” His tone was still gentle, but his eyes had started to take on that hard glint you were so terrified of.
“Thank you, Andy,” you whispered. 
He smiled, his eyes softening again. “You’re so welcome, honey. Now, turn around so I can put it on you,” he said as he took the box from you. You did as you were told and turned to face the other way. He draped the necklace across your chest and fastened it behind you. His hands ghosted over the back of your neck and you suppressed a shiver. “There. Turn back around now.” You did and he gave you an appraising look. “Smile pretty for me, baby.”
You gave what you were sure was a strained, brittle smile, but he still hummed in satisfaction. 
“Absolutely gorgeous.” His hand moved up to brush your cheek and you couldn’t help but flinch away from him. You regretted it immediately, but no matter what you told yourself, how hard you tried, you couldn’t stop your body from being afraid of his touch. 
He sighed, exasperated, and turned away from you. “I don’t understand why you insist on treating me like the bad guy,” he said, dejected.
Because you are the bad guy, you thought to yourself, but you were smart enough this time to not say it. You’d finally learned that lesson. “I’m sorry,” you said, reaching for his hand, but he pulled away.
“If you were sorry, you’d stop being so ungrateful! No one else is gonna take care of you like I do.”
 You nodded quickly. You needed to placate him and do it now. “I know! You take such good care of me. I know that.”
He stood up and turned on you with his hands on his hips. “Do you know that? Because you don’t show it. It’s not how you act. Do you have any idea how that makes me feel?”
The way he loomed over you made you want to cower, but you did your best to control your body. That would only make things worse. You had no idea how to respond. Another apology would only make him more angry.
He looked at you expectantly, but at your silence, he just sighed again, running a hand over his beard. “Maybe we need to continue this conversation downstairs.”
You sprang up at that and threw yourself at his feet. Not that. Anything but that. “Please, no, I’m sorry, I’ll be better. Please, no. We don’t need to go downstairs.”
He bent over to grab your arms and lift you off your knees. “That’s good,” he said softly, back to being gentle with you. “I don’t want to go down there, either. You know I don’t. I just want you to be good for me. Don’t you want this Christmas to be better than Thanksgiving?” It took everything in you not to grimace. You still felt the marks from what he’d done to you after Thanksgiving dinner. At the memory, you couldn’t help but go weak in his arms, letting him hold you, taking any comfort you could get. “I just want to have a perfect Christmas with you, sweetheart, show you how much I love you. I need you to stop resisting it.”
“I’m sorry,” you said, the words falling out of you, too scared to think of anything else. You blinked back your tears, not wanting to ruin your mascara or get his dress shirt wet. He wouldn’t take kindly to being late to the party after all this.
He rubbed a gentle hand down your back. “Shhh,” he cooed. “You’re ok, you’re fine.” After another moment, he pulled away from you, looking you up and down. “Now,” he said, “take a deep breath and get yourself together. We’re going to go to the party and have a nice time, aren’t we?” You nodded, hurriedly. “Then when we get home, you can show me exactly how sorry you are, how grateful you are. Good?”
“Yes, Andy,” you said, quietly. You couldn’t make your voice get any louder. 
He stepped back into your space and wrapped a hand around the back of your neck. He kissed you slowly, languidly. You let him. You had to. You matched his movements with your lips as much as you could, but he never cared too much how passionate the kiss was on your end as long as you didn’t resist him. As long as he was in control. He pulled back and stroked his thumb down your cheek. This time you didn’t flinch away. “That’s right. There’s my good girl. Come on, go touch up your lipstick. We don’t want to be late.”  
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Tag lists are open
@stargazingfangirl18 @drabblewithfrannybarnes @thezombieprostitute @jaqui-has-a-conspiracy-theory @bval-1 @km-ffluv @texmexdarling
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mybworlds · 4 days ago
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Wintry dance
Pairing: jackson!joel miller x f!reader (no use of Y/N)
Summary: You, after a very long trip alone across the country, arrive in Jackson. Joel is a very lonely man and after Ellie broke up with him, he's even more alone and grumpy. Tommy and Maria decide that you're going to stay at Joel's house for a while, at least until more houses are built. Will your cohabitation be easy? Or will it be more complicated than everyone thinks?
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Warnings: use of you, use of alcohol, loneliness, suicidal thoughts, a short story about sexual assault that occurred in the past I won't go into details, violence, blood, lots of sexually explicit content, use of petnames, dirty talk, fluff elements, mutual pining, the main characters spy on each other for a while, the image of the female character has the sole purpose of representing the character, but you can imagine her however you want, unspecified age gap, no physical description of the female character except for long hair often gathered in a ponytail or braid, she wears a bra and jeans (most of the time).
A/N Hey there, I'm sorry to make you wait almost a month between one chapter and another, but I really care about writing everything well and so I often take more time to write. I hope you like it as much as I do and if you don't like it, please be merciful. Likes, comments and reblogs are not mandatory, but very appreciated! ❤️
Masterlist
follow @mybworlds and turn on notifications to get notified when I post new fics
Taglist: @harriedandharassed
Thx for the dividers @saradika-graphics.
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Winter comes and even the first snowflakes begin their wintry dance.
You love snow, from time immemorial. It gives you the idea of magic. You find yourself to smile behind the windows of the house.
Your life is finally regular, no unexpected events, no runaways, nothing. Everything is. . . strangely normal. You still struggle to get used to all this!
It's good for you. Finally you are not afraid anymore, you sleep in a really comfortable bed, you have a regular breakfast, lunch and dinner. You started going out with guys around your age a few days ago, you get out with Dina and Jesse even if they're younger than you, but it's okay. They are funny. And all you need now is to relax and let go a little, at least as much as you can.
From time to time, Jesse or Dina or sometimes Tommy call you for patrols and you go. You are really good to shoot with a bow, it's what people say about you and it's okay because it means you became part of a community, part of something and it's not bad as you thought.
Well, that's not all rosy. . . there's Joel who never changes his icy courtesy, after those strange moments you experienced together a few days ago. Not a word to you more than necessary, not a glance more than necessary. You don't know how long you can stay here in his house. Sooner or later he will tell you to go away, you're sure of it.
Where will you go? Probably you'll go to Dina's or Maria's. . . no idea.
Today it's your 40th patrol and you'll go with Joel. The idea doesn't excite you, but you don't want to be a troublemaker for anyone. Joel's annoyed look is enough.
The only sound is the hoof of horses in the snow, it's a good sound. Snow doesn't fall and at least you can find the way to go back to Jackson.
The two of you don't say a word, you often look at each other to point to a prey or if one of you see an infected. You kill at least three of those clickers before to get off the horse and heading into the forest. Joel is by your side, he's quiet, precise and a couple of times kills two runners who tried to reach you. You look at him surprised, "Thanks," you say.
"Uh, uh," it's his only reply.
After ten feet you ask him, "Those things were uhm. . ." you whisper.
"Runners, yeah." he says in the same tone as your.
"But it means. . ."
"It means they have recently turned into infected."
"So, it's probably. . ."
"Yeah, it's probably some of those things are somewhere around here."
You swallow looking at him, you are not afraid, it's not your first time. But you usually kill them alone and so you didn't have to think to anyone else except you, "Afraid?" he asks.
You look at him "No, but I always faced 'em alone. I never watched someone's back before."
"‘s okay, you won't start today," he says before to start to walk turning his back to you.
In some places, snow is deeper so your steps are slower and you often sunk, a couple of times Joel gives his hands to you to reach a higher point or to help you to walk, his hands are bigger than yours and his grip is firm. He holds you until you don't reach him then he abruptly lets go of your grip as if the mere contact with you bothers him.
Finally you see a deer, it's a good prey, you hold the string and then you let the arrow fly, the deer has no escape. Your arrow hits its neck, the poor deer tries to escape, but it falls to the ground dead.
"You really good," Joel says when the two of you reach the deer and he pulls the arrow away from its neck "I thought everyone was exaggerating,” he adds, bringing you right back down to earth.
"Thanks, let's take it away," you say tying it with a double rope so the two of you can drag it away.
You two don't talk on the way back, partly because of the cold and partly because you don't know what to say to each other. You hoped that that half-compliment would bring about a slight change in your relationship, but instead he immediately underlined his opinion of you. You only glance at each other from time to time and then return to focus on the road ahead of you.
The two of you reach your horses where you double rope the deer and then take off again and head towards Jackson.
"I can't wait to drink two large glasses of wine and fall asleep," he says, closing his eyes almost as if he's already savoring that moment, you notice how two dimples form on the sides of his cheeks when he gets that rare relaxed expression and you can't help but smile "What? Why d' ya smile?"
You shrug your shoulders, "When you make that face you're funny" you say unable to get your smile back.
"Glad to hear that! So, I'm some kind of clown!" he exclaims.
"No, clowns have always made me sad." you reply by wrinkling your nose.
When you look up at Joel, you see him staring at you, you frown in confusion.
“So, what is it that you like?” he asks you.
"Tsk, I know you're only asking out of politeness, not out of interest," you say.
Joel doesn't answer, you probably hit the nail on the head, you look ahead, you know he can't stand you.
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It's evening. It's snowing again outside and it's very cold. Joel prepared the fire and strangely he didn't freeze you with his gaze nor did he give you the usual look with which he chases you away, you prepare a soup with meat and you bring him a plate that you place on his coffee table, then you turn your back and go to the kitchen, you're used to act like this with him. On the kitchen island there is also a hot dish for you that you prepared earlier, after two spoonfuls you hear a husky voice coming from the other room, "Why don't you come over to the fireplace? It's cold tonight."
You turn towards the fire and see Joel looking at you with the dish you prepared for him in his hands, "Come, won't bite" you look at his face as if to understand if he is joking or serious, his gaze is concentrated, but not hostile as usual so you nod, you get off the stool and you join him taking your dish with you.
He's sitting in an armchair, while you sit on the sofa in front of the fireplace. You look at him furtively at least a dozen times, then seeing him calmly eating, you imitate him.
The fire produces a familiar and pleasant crackling sound which heats both of you quickly and paints the walls and your faces a deep orange and black nuances.
"‘s good this soup!" he says savoring your dish down to the last spoonful.
"I'm glad you like it," you say, "is there any other dish you might like to eat? I can't guarantee success, but I'll try!" you exclaim trying to talk civilly with him without being attacked or cold-shouldered by his words..
He shakes his head, "Whatever it is, it'll be fine," he reassures you.
You nod.
For a while you only hear the crackling of the fire and the creaking of the burning wood, it's a strange but pleasant silence.
"You asked me earlier what it is that I like." you say after a while "I love the snow, seeing the snowflakes swirling in the air creating those little swirls. I love the expanses of wild flowers in spring or see a pristine meadow. I love going to the beach to see the ocean waves crash on the shore when summer arrives and then in autumn I love the carpets of red, yellow, brown leaves," you smile staring at the fire.
"You like nature, but. . . nothing about relationships with other people," he notes, you look up "You don't trust ‘em or is there some other reason?" he asks looking at you.
You bite your bottom lip, you find yourself looking at his face for a few moments before sighing, "Never mind. It's none of my business and I don't even care," he replies, suddenly freezing the room "Have you finished?" he asks you, getting up from the chair and pointing to the now empty plate in your hands, “Sure,” you reply.
"Good, gimme," he says, holding out his hand to take the plate that you immediately hand him, "If you wanna, stay close to the fire a little longer." he says as he's about to take his leave.
"Joel," he pauses, "I know I'm a burden to you, someone to get rid of, but I promise you, I'll try not to make you feel my presence too much, I know you don't wanna me around" you tell him, turning your torso partially towards him "when maybe they build more houses, I'll leave."
Joel stares at you in the semi-darkness and then he walks away without saying a word.
Actually, you love many other things, but you still don't feel completely at ease with Joel and above all he just admitted that deep down he doesn't really care what you like or what you're interested in.
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Joel washes those two plates and those two spoons at least twenty times. He doesn't know what to replicate to your words and therefore he delays the moment when he will find himself alone with you again. The truth is he doesn't know what he wants right now. You're still a burden, you're still a hindrance to his routine, but it's become harder to treat you badly now. Maybe it was Tommy's words, maybe Ellie's or maybe it was you with all your unspoken words, your sweetness, your attitude, your look that made him understand that he's not the only one who suffers from something.
He pours himself a drink, he places his lips against the glass, but then he thinks better and puts the glass down.
"Fuck!" he exclaims, then dries the dishes and finally joins you.
By the time he reaches you, you are fast asleep. You're on your stomach and hugging the sofa cushion.
He watches you, he runs a hand through his hair, then takes two blankets and he places them on you. You visibly relax, Joel can even swear he saw you smile and twice in the same evening is a lot.
He sits in the armchair and turns on the small light on the side table, he puts on his reading glasses and then takes a book from the drawer of the side table.
He reads several pages, stopping every now and then when he hears you moan meaningless words in your sleep or when he sees you wrinkle your forehead. He takes off his glasses and places the book on the side table, he puts out the fire and puts on the spark arrestor, then fixes the blankets for you, he gives you one last look and then leaves. When he gets into bed, he realizes that it's the first time in probably months that he has reached his room sober.
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When you wake up the next day, you have two warm, thick blankets over you. You stretch and yawn loudly, then you sit up and realize you're not in your bed, but in Joel's living room.
Did he let you stay here to sleep? This is really weird.
You get up and fold the blankets to the side, then you go to the kitchen and make yourself some coffee, it has a unique taste, but it's not that bad.
It's been a long time since you drank coffee. . .
You decide to make one for Joel, he's an asshole, but he'll still host you at his house. You take a cup that you imagine is his with an owl on it, you smile. The owl actually represents him very well, it's a nocturnal, solitary and extremely territorial animal.
You pour the coffee into the cup and go upstairs, the door to his room is almost completely closed, you knock weakly a couple of times, then open it. Joel is lying face up in the center of the bed, his arms completely open so that he takes up the entire bed, the pulled aside covers show his exposed torso.
You watch his thick fingers full of small cracks and cuts, his hands relaxed, his face is a mixture of sweetness and masculinity, the wrinkles are barely noticeable, the lips parted, his chest is broad as it looked and you watch a lot of scratches and a very large old scar on his abdomen.
You swallow, you lower your head unsure about what to do or what to say, maybe you have to go back to the hall and knock again and pretend you didn't stare at him for so long. You can almost hear his voice thundering against you.
Yes, you'll do so.
You are about to get out, when you hear him move into the bed and mumbles something to you, you clearly hear your name so you slowly turn your back to the door again, fuck. . .
"Hey, that's my mug!" he says with a sleepy expression and tone of voice.
You clear your throat and then you offer his cup, "Yeah, it is. Here."
He sits in the center of the bed exposing even more his torso. You look at him or rather you look at his bare chest.
He follows your gaze, “Oh, fuck. . . sorry, I'm wearing a t-shirt," Joel apologizes, as you see him lean towards a nearby chair and cover himself.
You look everywhere but him who is now wearing a grey shirt and reaches out a hand towards the cup you're holding out to him and begins to sip his coffee.
"D' ya feel uncomfortable?" he asks you all of a sudden.
You look at him again, "N - n - no," you say barely hold his gaze.
"‘s okay, darlin'. I won't bite." he says putting the cup on his bedside table "Comin' in a while, I'll see ya downstairs, okay?" you nod before to leave.
Darling?
No one has ever used these nicknames and above all you don't expect them from a person who is so openly hostile towards you.
Joel is a living enigma. He says such harsh words, but then he does such sweet things like tucking you in. You don't understand.
You walk down the stairs slowly feeling your heart beating wildly in your chest. When you reach the kitchen, it almost feels like someone has sucked the air out of your lungs.
Ralph. . . the thought of him suddenly comes back violently before your eyes.
You pour some cold water into a glass and sip it slowly, “Fuck...” you murmur sitting on a stool, you place your hands on the shelf feeling your head spin, you close your eyes, inhaling and exhaling deeply, counting from fifty backwards.
When you regain control of yourself, you get up and go out onto the porch, you find yourself thinking that you need to get out of this house as soon as possible.
In a certain sense your life has improved, you think, you have friends, days that are almost identical to each other, you have a roof over your head, food in your stomach, but your nightmares continue to haunt you.
You have pain everywhere. He beat you mercilessly, he punched you under an eye, he violently squeezed your wrists while he raped you, you stagger, you want to report what you lived, but in the QZ, when they saw you in that state, they thought you had been bitten and they pointed all sorts of weapons at you. You were shaking, you peed on yourself, you were raped and they were pointing guns at you and looking at you like you were filthy. After verifying that you were not infected, they listened to you, but their response was that they have much more serious problems than yours, that's what an officer told you when you told him why you were covered in blood and bruises. You are treated and a nurse gives you a painkiller, the same scene repeats itself before your eyes without stopping, you can't breathe. You fall asleep seeing Ralph push himself inside you with increasing violence and feeling your flesh tear under his thrusts.
You wake up with a start, screaming and waving your hands in the air to free yourself from his grip. You sit up and bring your knees close to your chest, you place your hands on your ears and burst into tears.
NEXT CHAPTER ➢
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snapscube · 6 months ago
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on the name thing: i think people want to call you something different because they like you and want to feel like they're your friend by giving you their own quirky nickname. a show of affection or something. that's my good will interpretation of it because it's certaintainly something I can relate to.
also hope this is ok to say, but I miss seeing you doing facecam. you're gorgeous ^^ i respect if you don't feel comfy with it tho, it ain't easy and it's probably much comfier to not bother with it at all lol
have a great day, Penny!
(i know i literally just said im moving on from this but i felt like this idea was worth responding to, AFTER THIS i am moving on guaranteed) i get that! and thats why i stress that i feel this way regardless of intent because the last thing i want to do is cause guilt or demonize people for something that's ultimately pretty common. but even considering your example, with that notion comes a couple problems:
i am not your friend! i do think that there has been a bit of an OVER-correction when it comes to how people think about parasocial relationships and personally relating to people they admire, and generally i like to push back against the notion that having any parasocial relationship is a bad thing cause personally i think parasocial relationships are unavoidable and it's more about your expectations towards that one-sided relationship that become the issue. but two things remain true in either case: i know you so much less than you know me, AND you know me infinitely less than you think you do. so at the end of the day, it is not my responsibility to walk on eggshells about behavior that assumes an intimacy from me i am incapable of and especially uninterested in retaliating.
i have to stress that i am extremely aware it would be insane of me to expect to control peoples actions regarding this on such a large scale, and im also well aware many people come in who are new who get this info for the first time. i repeat the conversation in the interest of introducing those boundaries to people who are new and in general just reinforcing them. i try not to be such a stick in the mud about most things but this is something I REALLY care about, and so i give it the no-nonsense approach i think it deserves. on that note: understanding that there are going to be gaps where people either just do not know about my preferences or simply do not care doesn't mean i have to pretend like i also don't care about it. people can say whatever they want about me in their own spaces, you can call me whatever the fuck you want amongst friends. i do not care cause i do not have the capability to care, it's never going to reach me! but that does not mean i have to pretend to enjoy it if/when it DOES reach me, especially if it's presented as an option for me to respond to. if someone just calls me something weird in a chatroom it's like, i literally do not have the energy or overall scope of vision to react to every one of those instances specifically. there absolutely are things u just gotta let roll off of u sometimes. BUT, the reason we often get into this conversation repeatedly on my tumblr is because given the ask format i get a lot of people who go out of their way to approach me with name jokes or loopholes to an actively established preference as if they are looking for my approval on it. that is where it becomes a little more unpalatable for me.
and to respond to your second question: i appreciate the kind words on that! i sure would like to reintroduce facecam again someday somehow but right now my desk setup is not great for it haha
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burningcheese-merchant · 18 days ago
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"Eyes" - BurningCheese Short Story #4
I have a bunch of asks in my inbox, and I would like to answer them... but I also want to get this short story finished and posted before my SO nags me about going to bed super late again lol.
I'll answer people's messages tomorrow! In the meantime, enjoy this short! Thanks for your patience and thanks to those who reached out! I always enjoy and appreciate people taking the time to tell me their thoughts!
'Were they always like this...?' Golden Cheese wondered. 'So bright...'
Burning Spice returned her curious stare with a smile and nothing more. He quite liked this unprompted attention, honestly. Just how long would it last, if he kept choosing not to interrupt it?
'So bold... I don't think I've ever seen anything like it...'
"Birdie~" he called to her playfully. (He couldn't help it. She looked so cute when she concentrated that he simply had to say something.)
'So red... The shade of White Lily's eyes is so much more... calm. Subdued.'
"Little bird?" His smile began to falter.
'And his pupils... Were they always like this, as well? Was he born with a beast's eyes, right from the very beginning?'
"Little thief?" His tone sounded less playful and more... confused.
'What is it... Just what do I see...'
"Golden Cheese?"
"Hm?"
Only now did she realize that Burning Spice had invaded her personal space (as he was wont to do) by leaning down and resting his forehead against hers. Perhaps that was why his eyes seemed so bright, at least in part - they were hardly an inch from her own now.
When he knew she was back in the waking world, his smile returned. "There you are," he said. "Why are you staring at me, little thief? Can I help you with something?"
"I..." She averted her gaze from him, her cheeks flushing red with embarrassment. "I'm sorry," she said. "I don't mean to be so rude. I was... lost in thought."
"I could tell," he chuckled. "And where did your mind wander off to? Somewhere to do with me?"
"Nowhere important," she said, still refusing to look at him.
"Come on. Tell me. Sing for me, pretty bird." He cupped her chin. "You don't want to keep being rude, do you? Not looking at someone when they talk to you is very rude. Turn those pretty eyes back to me and speak your mind."
"Eyes..." she murmured. She did what he asked and looked at him again, her gaze once more unwavering and... curious. "That's what I was thinking about, actually."
"What do you mean?"
"Your eyes," she said. "That's where my mind wandered off to, Burning Spice. Straight into your eyes."
"Ah, I see." His lips curled into another teasing smile. "What about them? You like them?"
"They're very unique," she told him. "I know plenty of people with red eyes... including a dragon and a man made of fire... and even their eyes aren't quite like yours."
"I certainly hope not. I'd rather you stare into my eyes than theirs."
She made a face at him and gently swatted at his cheek, earning her another chuckle. "I mean it," she said. "I'm not saying this lightly. Your eyes are... one of a kind."
"Such high praise," he purred. "I think and say the same of yours, pretty bird."
"I feel... drawn to them, when I look at them," she continued, past his little attempt at flirting. "I'm not sure how else to put it. I see them and I think of..."
"Of...?" he echoed.
"...Of many things," she eventually finished. "They aren't static. They grow brighter, dimmer... I almost wonder if you change them at will."
"Maybe I do. Maybe I don't." He leaned in the slightest bit closer, letting his nose brush against hers. "Regardless, what do they make you think of? What do you see? Tell me. I'm curious."
She paused, losing herself in thought for another moment. Burning Spice stayed put, patient but eager, waiting for her answer.
"I see... a star," she finally told him. "I see stars, shining brilliantly within the vastness of space. I see them glowing, twinkling, burning so bright... and I see them falling apart. Collapsing in on themselves. Dying valiantly in an all-consuming flame. These beacons of light in a deep, dark ocean, succumbing to loneliness at long last... but not with a whisper. With a bang. With aplomb. With the same brilliance they had possessed all their lives."
His smile grew. "Yeah? What else?"
"I see a great inferno," she continued. "A spark that grew out of control and into something too powerful for anyone to stop. Waves of fire crashing down, consuming everything in their path in mindless fury. Swallowing a forest whole and spitting out its ashes. Striking primal fear in the hearts of all who see it. Rampaging across the world until either someone puts an end to its reign of terror, or there is nothing left to consume, and so it consumes itself instead."
He hummed. For a moment, just a moment, his smile faltered again. He composed himself quickly - but not quickly enough for Golden Cheese not to notice.
"I see... a fire pit," she said, a bit more carefully this time. "A stove top, an oven, a nest of metal and charcoal... I see someone hard at work, their brows knit, tending to the flames as a mother tends to her child. Hammering away at a piece of unrefined steel, sprinkling salt into a pan, carefully molding a mound of clay. Perhaps only for a few hours, perhaps for days and nights. But at the end, when they're finished, I see them reach into those flames they cared for so diligently and pull out the fruits of their labor. A fine sword. A delicious meal. A beautiful vase. Something new, something great. From within this force of death and destruction still comes creation and ingenuity."
A blush began to creep across Burning Spice's face. "I..."
"Now, I don't see these things all at once, all the time," she told him. "They... change. The flames in your eyes rise and fall. They glow, they simmer, they explode. Never a dull moment, in those eyes of yours."
"Yeah?" he asked quietly.
"Yeah," she echoed quietly.
"Then... if they always change..." He let his hand wander up from her chin to her cheek, his fingers ghosting over her skin. "What do they change into... when I do this?"
He kissed her. Slowly, deeply, those fiery eyes still open and gazing into her own. And she stared right back at him, shining gold gazing into smoldering embers. Red, orange, yellow, white... all the colors of summer. Heat and light and unashamed passion, boring into her soul.
When he pulled away, he let himself linger, his lips still just barely brushing against her own. She could feel his hot breath on her lips, on her skin. Still taste it in her mouth.
"And now?" he asked. "What do you see now?"
She didn't answer. She only continued staring at him in silence, lost in his warm gaze.
"Tell me, Golden Cheese," he insisted, caressing her cheek. It was a deep red and hot to the touch. "What do my eyes look like now? What do you see in them?"
"...I..."
He pressed another kiss to her lips. "Tell me," he said again. "Please. I want to know. I must know."
"I see..." She faltered again. Another moment of silence passed before she spoke again.
"I see a hearth," she murmured.
"You do?" He smiled again... with the same warmth and adoration she saw glittering in his eyes. "What about it? What kind?"
She opened her mouth to speak, but nothing came out. She closed her eyes, staying still and silent... and then she sighed softly, shaking her head.
"Sorry," she said. "I'm sorry. I..."
"Sorry? What for?"
She was already pulling away from him. The spell had seemingly been broken; now she was tearing her eyes away from his own and casting them any which way. Anywhere but him.
"It's rude to stare at people, Burning Spice," she said.
She turned and started walking away, her head slightly bowed. He stood frozen in shock for a moment or two, before he snapped out of it and hurried after her.
"I don't care!" he told her. "Who cares about that? I don't mind if you're rude! Be as rude as you'd like!"
"Sorry," she said quickly, shaking her head again.
"Where are you going?" he asked. "Why are you leaving me? At least let me say my piece! Let me tell you what your eyes show me!"
"Maybe another time," she told him, her cheeks turning a shade darker.
"No! Now! Let me do it now!" He rushed up to her side, now keeping perfect pace with her. "Ignoring others when they talk to you is rude too, remember?! If you don't want to be rude, then stay! Stay with me! Let us tell each other more of our thoughts!"
They stayed in this loop for a little while. Golden Cheese with her arms crossed and face a deep scarlet, walking away from her own foolishness with increasing speed. Burning Spice with his pleading look, those telltale flames now crackling frantically, always hot on her heels and fighting to take back their little moment.
Until she had enough of their charade and took off into the air, with a flap of her wings so sudden and forceful that the gust of wind nearly knocked him over, and he found himself pouting after her as she flew up and away.
--------------
A supernova. That's what that first thing Golden Cheese talks about is. She sees supernovae in Burning Spice's eyes. Haha.
Something I often like to do (or attempt to do) when I write is... try to tell people what something is without outright stating it. Describe an object without mentioning its name. Let people put those pieces together themselves. Let their minds wander. Leave a few spots on the canvas blank, so they can fill them in on their own. It's a fun little challenge. A guessing game. Keeps people reading, if only to figure out what you're referring to, before they skip to the glossary out of boredom or frustration.
Things lend themselves to a lot of fascinating imagery if and when you allow yourself to take on that sort of challenge and try to view them that way. Go look at a plant or a mug and try to tell yourself what it is without saying it's a plant or a mug. You start to train your mind the more you do it. Might help you write better. Hopefully. I hope it's working for me.
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pablitogavii · 1 year ago
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Hey I just wanted to tell you that I really like your stories. Your writing style is incredible and I'm always excited to read stories written by you. :) I hope you have an amazing day and take care of yourself!
Thank you so much! I really appreciate it! <333
Cold
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You traveled with your boy to Germany to watch his next match for Champions and the moment you stepped out of the airport walking towards the cab, you knew Pablo was going to be grumpy about this weather. Pablo Gavi doesn't like the cold!!!
Hot Sevillano in him never gets used to sharp winds, rainy days and let alone such cold weather that it's here.
Bebitoo: did you get into the cab mi amor???
You smiled at how much he cares about every single detail when you travel separately especially when you're on your own. His family happened to be unable to come and so did his sister because of school, so you were his only supporter this time. Pablo always really appreciated you being there to support him during games.
"Mister,um...could I leave after the meeting and be back before dinner???" Pablo asked Xavi who knew really well where the boy wanted to go desperately.
"But no breaking the diet, chaval? Vale??" Xavi asked and Pablo promised thanking him with a big smile and texting you good news. Today was all for the two of you!!!
"And buy her flowers!" Xavi added tapping Pablo's shoulder with smirk while walking away and Pablo blushed nodding his head and taking the note from his coach.
"Amor! Amorrr! Abri!!!" you heard Pablo whining while standing in front of the door outside with the wind hitting his sensitive face. You opened hugging him excitedly happy to finally be together again.
"Are those for me???" you ask with the roses resting in his arms as he nodded with a smile.
"They're so beautiful Pablito! Gracias amor!!" you say taking and smelling them while he was jumping in place.
"Can we talk about them inside!? Porf!" he said and you chuckled letting him in and he immediately sighed in relief taking off his jacket and walking to the living room to grab a thick blanket.
"Are you really that cold???" you chuckle seeing him snuggle dup in the blanket so only his dark orbs were staring back at you. Que fofino!!!
"YES! It's freezing here! Joderrr!" Pablo said and you chuckled offering to make him some warm tea he immediately liked while walking to figure out how to turn on the fireplace.
"Here's some camomile and honey for mi frozen Pablito" you chuckle putting it on the table smiling wide when you saw that he turned on the fire place and made a little cozy fort in front of it.
"Venga aqui conmigo amorcito!!!"he said opening the blanket shortly for yo to join him and then engulfing you both with it as you faced the burning fire.
"Want your tea while it's hot amor???" you said and he nodded as you reached and gave it to him smiling when you saw his little red nose and his blushed cheeks as he got warmer now.
"Te gusta???" you ask and he nodded putting it down and kissing the top of your head while you rested your back against his strong chest enjoying the way having him around feels.
"It's perfect..." he said and you smiled looking up and he was already staring at your lips before leaning down and kissing passionately.
"Hmm..how long do I have you for Pablito?" you ask after you pulled away slowly clearly in awe with each other's feeling of love.
"You have me siempre amorcito..." he said smartly and you blushed nodding your head and leaning up to peck him quickly once more,
"You know what I mean...when do you need to be back???" you ask playing with his hoodie while he combed through your hair making you very sleepy.
"We have time princesa...relax" he said pulling you back and starting to massage your shoulders soothingly as you became even more sleepy thank to his ministrations.
"You're making me sleepy so that I don't make you go for a walk with me..." you chuckle and he nodded kissing the top of your head again.
"I love you amorcito...mucho...but I am NOT going out there in that freezing hell!" he said making you laugh and nod your head while cuddle up closer to him enjoying the warmth yourself.
"It's really not that bad. You are just too hot mi Sevillano" you said and he smirked looking down at your innocent face. You knew well what you were doing to him with this.
"Mala...princesa muy muy mala" he smirked and you chuckled as you both enjoyed cuddles before you fell asleep.
"Amorcito...time to wake up preciosa???" Pablo was slowly shaking your body while kissing you lovingly and you whined nuzzling further into his neck. You were so warm...it was perfect.
"Nooooo...so warm!!!" you said and he chuckled raising your chin to kiss your lips lovingly.
"Now you're the one who wants the warmth huh princesa???" he chuckled and you nodded kissing him back and reaching to touch his fluffy hair.
"I need to go back soon preciosa..." he said and you pouted that it was already time and that you will need to sleep alone tonight...ugh, you hated that!!!
"How am I going to sleep without you Pablitooo?" you said adorably and he couldn't help his smile while kissing your lips again.
"We'll be on face time until you fall asleep, vale?" he asked tucking a piece of your hair behind your ear and you blush nodding and really liked your little routine when he was away from home.
"But who is gonna warm me up when I get back to the hotel???" Pablo said and you smirked pecking his lips a few times which he really much enjoyed right now.
"Hmm Pedri" you said into the kiss making you both burst out in laughter while getting up from the blankets and walking towards the front door.
"I am going to miss you so much..." he said holding you still not able to let go and open that front door. Ugh this was always the hardest!!!
"Hmm me too...nothing matchess your hands around and you night kisses" you say pecking his bottom lip and he smiles nodding his head and kissing your forehead.
"We will see each other tomorrow" you add and he nods but when you tried to move to let him go he wouldn't budge.
"You have to let me go Pablitooo..." you say but he just pulls you closer nuzzling his face into your neck.
"Your'e so warmmmm!!! And it's so cold outside!!!" he said and you chuckle kissing his cheeks, nose, forehead and finally lips. He finally let go putting on his jacket about to leave when something popped into your head.
"Pablo! Wait!!" you say and he turns around smirking when you ran to the bedroom to grab your special blanket giving it to him.
"It's my warming blanket...smells like us" you say with a blush and he nods taking it and kissing you lips lovingly.
"I love you amorcito..." he said and you smile nodding your head kissing him back.
"I love you too" you say opening the door and he whines stepping out as you chuckled.
"Bye preciosa..." he said pouting and you send him a kiss.
"bye pablitoo.." you say as he got into the cab and you closed the door already missing him but excited to see him again tomorrow <333
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dottiro · 2 months ago
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A Dear in the Headlights
Unreliable summary: Your date doesn’t show up after hours of waiting; in frustration you drive over to Pantalone’s house, knowing he’ll always comfort you. / You get into a car accident due to a deer in the headlights—deer, dear? Does it matter? Warnings: Yandere, car crash, implicated kidnapping, Pantalone is rich, descriptions of dead/mangled body(ies), DEAD DOVE DON'T EAT Note: This is a rewrite of THIS fic from my old blog.
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"Hey, it’s me. Your phone has been going to voicemail for a while—you’re probably asleep, but I'm almost at your house. I know, I know, I shouldn't have come to your home in the middle of the night, but once again; you were right."
You press your lips together during the silence that follows. The road ahead is dimly lit by lanterns that do a poor job of showing the way. Only your solitary headlights indicate what's ahead of you. 
Disappointment has yet to leave your system as you recall the events from a few hours before."It’s annoying. I wish I could see through people like you do."
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Earlier in the evening, you'd been getting ready for a date with a guy who never showed. Unfortunately for you, these occurrences have become normal. The worst part is that hope remains within you. No matter how often it happens, you still believe the next would be better. 
You wonder why those assholes bother to chat when they never plan to show.
A bitter sigh escapes your lips. You’re rambling again… how embarrassing. 
For a moment, you hope Pantalone will leave his voicemails unread. Perhaps that’d save you face when you’d wake him up in the middle of the night—but you know better. Pantalone does not let anything go unnoticed. Sooner than later, he’d pick up his phone to hear your aimless talking and waste of time. 
“Anyhow, I’m almost there. Since you gave me the keys to the gate; I’ll be entering your property. Sorry, not sorry.” 
There is a short silence before you end the voicemail. 
Although you know you shouldn’t drive and call, the road to Pantalone’s home was—and will always be—abandoned. Not once have you seen traffic coming in or out. Keeping one eye open will be enough. 
As you continue forward, the gates surrounding his estate come into sight, and no matter how often you see it, you continue to be in awe at how much he owns. 
You’re not sure what his job exactly concludes, Pantalone is a private person, but you know he organises parties for nobles in Snezhnaya. Only the top percentage of people are invited—vision wielders with high ranks, the top businessmen, and daughters born into money pleading for his attention; they all flock for an invitation so they can have the possibility to fall in his graces. 
By now, you’ve been able to guess he works as a finance minister for Snezhnaya. If not, something similar will be the answer.
Yet, despite his charming personality and social life, Pantalone continues to appreciate the quiet over the chaos of Snezhnaya’s capital. 
At the end of each week, he’d return home to his mansion for the weekend.
You can't blame him.
With one last turn, you arrive at the entrance to the large gate. Usually, it’s closed. However, tonight you find them wide open. 
You can’t find a reason why they should be.
The car slows down as you hesitate to intrude into his property. 
In the distance, a gentle light is cast inside his mansion. 
Is he still awake?
With uncertainty, you let your car roll past the gates, speeding up in curiosity. Wanting to be secluded, Pantalone has surrounded himself by nature to hide. You have to drive through the dense greenery before you reach the lights in the distance. 
Your frown turns into a smile when suddenly the upbeat tune of your ringtone echoes through the car.
“Pantalone!” You pick up, holding your phone to your mouth. Your voice is upbeat—you didn’t expect him to call back so soon. You’re surprised he doesn’t comment on its loudness.
“Dearest, would you be so kind as to tell me where you are right now?”
You raise an eyebrow before a chuckle escapes your lips. “Did you or did you not listen to the voicemail?” you ask. 
Only a mere few minutes have passed since you ended the one-sided call. If he had listened to it, he would’ve known that you were on the way—already approaching his home. 
Background sounds on his end of the call muffle his reply. For just a second, you take your eyes off the road to turn up the volume.
“Are you busy? I hear lots of people.”
You glance at the road as you keep one hand on the wheel. Then, you turn back to your phone, trying to adjust the volume again.
“Pantalone? I can’t hear—”
A loud crash makes you drop the phone before you finish your sentence. In a panic, you release the gas pedal; trying to break instead, resulting in the car drifting as it loses control. Instinctively, both your hands reach for the steering wheel. With all your power, you try to go against the current your car is trapped in—hoping to stabilise it, but failing as you drive over a hobble. Instantly, a thud is created, and something slams against your window, breaking it and shattering shards of glass across the front seats. 
Your arms fly up in front of your face, losing your grip on the wheel as you brace yourself. In seconds, you fly forward as another crash happens; and this time your car comes to a full stop. Instantly, the airbags register, pushing your body back into the chair with immense force.
Your ears buzz as you struggle to breathe, feeling like the wind has been pushed out of your lungs. A million thoughts enter your mind and at the same time, you can’t register any of them. Time passes too fast, yet too slow. You try to grasp what happened, watching darkness swallow you whole when the headlights flicker one last time before turning off. 
It’s dark, it’s silent. 
Faintly, somewhere distant, you hear the motor continuing to hum. 
The sound becomes louder and louder until you hear a familiar voice. 
“Y/n—?!”
Pantalone?
You hear Pantalone’s voice through your phone. A dim white light tells you it must still be in the car. With only the artificial- and moonlight to guide you, you try to recall your surroundings. Did your phone get thrown back to the back or front during your crash?
As the sound of voices continues to increase, they become deafening. With a throbbing head, you push the deflating airbag out of your way, clicking the seat belt loose and climbing out of your seat with shaky legs. 
You take steps forward. 
One… 
then two… 
—you think you stop after that.
Cold air falls into your face, embracing you like death’s hands tickling your face as he debates whether or not to take you with him to the afterlife. Behind you, the front door of the car falls shut. After the slam, the blinkers go off; beeping as one of the orange lights flashes on and off.
You take a deep breath. 
Your entire body pulses as your body sways. You have to put your hand on the car to keep yourself upright. Slowly, your other hand reaches for your head. Aside from the confusion, you don’t feel any pain. You wonder if it’s the adrenaline.
Right.
What did you hit again?
A deer?
You block out the distant voices as you make your way around the car. By keeping one of your hands against the metal surface, you circle it without losing your balance. 
Without the headlights shining the path ahead of you, it’s hard to see what might be on the street. But, even without lights, no one can miss the mangled silhouette crawling forward. Its legs are bent; one loose to a point where you fear it’d fully snap off if it continues to drag its limbs across the cement. 
Suddenly, its head turns up and it cries out like a human. The sound brings chills to your bones and the hollow feeling it leaves behind makes a sob escape your lips. A small button nose lifts into the air as it looks at the moon shining above the gates. 
You are paralysed.
A button nose?
The figure crawls again, using its twisted arms to move forward and dragging what remains left behind onto the concrete floor. 
You blink through your tears. The world continues to spin and you eventually force your eyes closed. The voices in the background are becoming increasingly louder, making your head scream as it becomes too much. Almost instantly, your body starts to feel warm as pain floods over your being.
The silhouette on the floor is still there when you open your eyes.
Long hair is matted with blood and dirt. Eyes threaten to cave in as the circles under its eyes claw holes in its skin. Sharp cheekbones peek out, cutting through the air as it drags its nails through the rubble, inching forward slowly but surely; much like a poor animal.
You now realise it’s crawling away from the house.
Right…
Pantalone.
You turn around back to the car. With the adrenaline leaving your body quickly, you need to tell him to call for an ambulance. 
Before you can do as much as turn, a light is cast upon you. At that moment when you see her clearly, the girl screams in agony—not in pain but out of despair. 
Her clothes are ripped, and blood pools up around the middle of her body and she seems skinny, underweight even. Likely, she was already in a bad state before the crash; underweight and starving at the least. Her figure is already dishevelled and now deformed because of you. 
Hysterically, she claws forward, further gashing her skin and leaving more blood in her trail.
The thick long stripe of blood going from her body to the end of the car; down under your feet.
Did you hit…?
…No…
“Y/n.” Pantalone steps between you and the girl. With ease, he shields the sight from your eyes. His eyes inspect your body,
Much as if you were his priority.
“Can you move?” he asks.
His figure is blurry yet his face is so perfect… much unlike the girl. Your limbs feel weak as the image is etched into your mind like an ugly scar. Every time you close your eyes, you see her. Even as the people surrounding you reach over to Pantalone to help, the cries only double and combust into a choir of anguish.
Pantalone says something to you, but you can no longer process what he’s saying.
He seems calm…
You think of how easy it’d be to fall in his arms and believe everything to be a dream. Surely, it must be—!
The back of his hand comes up to caress your cheek, dragging a line of thick blood from your forehead to your chin and staining his gloves
His eyes open, and the intense colours of his irises flood sense into your brain. With his hand keeping your head steady, he says, “you’re alright, my dear.”
Then, he repeats it.
You’re alright.
Pantalone wouldn’t lie to you. He hadn’t lied in the past, and neither will he now. You choose to believe him. 
His hands hold your face. He brings you closer until his lips fall next to your ear.
You diminish your thoughts as you let his voice carry over. 
You got into a car crash because you hit a deer. You lost control of your wheel, ran into a tree, and as a result of the impact you got a concussion—your mind is scrambled, trauma making your memory warped and untrue.
He repeats it, whispering the words like a gentle song as his arms turn you around. One hand creeps up to your neck, while the other pushes the small of your waist forward.
You got into a car crash because you hit a deer. You lost control of your wheel, ran into a tree, and as a result of the impact you got a concussion—your mind is scrambled, trauma making your memory warped and untrue.
Lights shimmer onto the roads. For a moment, you’d believe they’re fireflies. Voices surround you, either barking orders or following them with timid voices. Pantalone’s presence stands out among the others. His warmth makes you continue forward. You want to continue forward with him.
He repeats the words. 
You got into a car crash because you hit a dear. You lost control of your wheel, ran into a tree, and as a result of the impact you got a concussion—your mind is scrambled, trauma making your memory warped and untrue.
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The next time you open your eyes, you’re in Pantalone’s room.
His silken sheets are a beautiful dark violet. They feel soft against your skin. When you place your head against the pillow, you smell his natural scent mixed with a soft lavender. It's different from the perfume he wears daily—more subtle and inviting—but you find that it suits him. You wonder if the lavender is a remnant of the many bath scents he uses.
You savour the short moment of your headache disappearing. The fresh and calm scent makes you want to turn around in his bed for longer. Your fingers dig into the mattress, enjoying the remaining warmth, and then you close your eyes.
You think of last night.
You clearly remember the date date-gone-wrong; and the crash too, but you fail to recall how you got to Pantalone’s house. Did you pass out?
You know you shouldn’t have called without driving, and you know you shouldn’t have assumed his roads would be abandoned as always,
But…
What got in your way…?
As you shovel through your memories, Pantalone enters the room unannounced. His expression shifts from a frown to something you’d describe as relief.
He apologises for entering before knocking. 
“It’s alright. I’m the one who should say sorry. I…” 
Your headache returns as you try to remember what happened. 
“I can remember crashing my car but everything after is fuzzy, like… a scattered memory or dream…?” 
You stop, taking a moment to find your following words. 
“It’s like my brain stopped working.”
Pantalone sits next to you on the edge of the bed and places his hand near yours. His fingers snake forward, reaching to intertwine yours in his. “The doctors tell me you suffer from a concussion. I believe it’d be best for you to remain in my care until you’ve recovered.”
“I’ve already made a big enough mess. I wouldn’t want to bother you more.”
You place your hands down on the blanket that covers your legs. Your fingers fiddle with the fabric as a way to distract yourself. Only now, you notice that you’re dressed in an oversized pyjama, which you assume is Pantalone’s. You are left to wonder when and how you got changed.
Pantalone tilts his head, eying you down from over his glasses. You know that look, he’s sent it many times before. Never does it fail at making you feel small.
He brushes his thumb over your knuckles and you realise he has shed his gloves. It’s a rare sight and you take comfort in his natural warmth when he squeezes gently.
“You can depend on me, dear. I’ve informed my assistant that I’ll be home this week. You only need to recover; let me figure out the rest.”
You sigh, letting out a mix of disappointment and frustration pointed towards yourself.
“I’m sorry. I know I shouldn’t have called while driving, but—“ You groan in frustration. A fragment of yesterday flashes through your mind. “It just… ran in front of my car. I don’t know what animal would do that.”
You recall the first impact into the second. The pain in your body is a reminder of what it felt to take one hit after another.
When you lift your head from your hands—you gaze at Pantalone. The hand that had held you is now under his chin. He appears to be lost in thought, slightly frowning with lips pursed as a habit of focus.
“’lone?”
His frown turns into a soft smile at the sound of your voice and he puts his hand on your knee. “Sorry, dear. Just thinking.” He continues, “let me fix your problems. In the meantime, rest. I shall be here if you need anything.”
You watch him stand up from the side of the bed, patting your knee affectionately before disappearing into the corridor. 
As much as his presence calms you, you sense a feeling of dread.
You’re missing something.
You try to summarise last night’s events one last time.
It starts with the date. An hour before you left for the restaurant, he had messaged you; telling you he was excited and ready to see you. Then, when he fails to show up, you call him, but end up with an ‘unknown number’ response. He had blocked you. 
After this, you drive home, only to turn around as you arrive home and decide to head to Pantalone’s instead. You try to call him, feeling guilty for showing up unannounced in the middle of the night, but he doesn’t pick up and you leave a voicemail instead. 
You pass his open gates—did you open them?—and your cell phone goes off as Pantalone calls you within mere minutes of the voicemail being sent.
When you can’t hear him—why couldn’t you hear him?—you turn up your volume.
You crash… but you run into something first. 
What did you run into?
Something ran from the woods into the pathway.
You remember vaguely getting out of the car, but you’re not certain… 
What comes next…?
No matter how much you try to shuffle the events; certain things remain a mystery. Gaps are left unfilled as you toss and turn under the soft sheets. On the feathered pillow, you lay your bandaged head in defeat. 
You try to push the questions out of your head, letting the lingering scent of Pantalone consume your mind. When you close your eyes, you force the cries of last night out of your mind. A vague image of a mangled body comes up. You try to remember Pantalone instead. 
His reassuring words, his gentle touches. His generosity and never-ending patience with you; even in this situation. You think of how calm he is and how restless you are.
Sooner than later,
It’s not enough. 
You sit up and toss the covers from your body.
The cruel cold embraces you. A chill crawls up from your feet to your neck. You remember it similarly last night.
If you could, you’d stay in his bed forever. Alas, your mind plagues you and even he could not bring comfort in your darkest hours.
The room has been darkened, yet, stipes of stubborn sunlight continue to escape the cracks of the thick curtains. The time is evident to you even before you pull open one side. In the late morning sunlight, all of Pantalone’s property is visible.
Unlike last time, you now see his beautiful garden. At the window, you can see the gardener tending to the plants available in Snezhnaya below you. You see the few servants walk around at the front of his mansion. Then, your eyes follow the gravel path that’s framed by trees. 
Your car is gone,
But the long trail of blood on the street remains.
To your surprise, it drags into two directions, as if there were two separate entities. One seems to have combusted into a pool at a tree, while the other continues to drag towards the gate for a few meters. 
The image of a mangled woman pops up in your head. You remember her dirty and worn-out clothes, her leg that had been twisted at an inhumane angle, her bones that stuck out from beneath her skin.
“Y/n.”
You let the curtain fall from your grasp and you turn around.
Another flash pops up in your mind. You remember the stranger that walked up to you with the flashlight, the other people who Pantalone yelled at, the way the mangled woman started begging for her life when one of the men crushed her skull with his boot.
Two hands place themselves sturdy on your shoulders. You jolt backwards, but Pantalone’s hands keep you close.
His expression is peaceful. Gentle. Calm.
So many things you’re not.
He calls out to you again, dragging one of his gloved fingers like a familiar habit over your cheek. So so familiar.
His eyes remain closed and he users you back to his bed, telling you that you’re still unwell and that you need rest.
You ask him about the mangled woman.
He frowns.
“Dear, your brain is shaken from the crash. When I, alone, came to your car—you were passed out. I had to carry you back to the house.”
You ask him about the trail of blood and your missing car. 
“I first called a mechanic to drag your car away, then I called a friend who works as a vet to carry the deer away.”
Pantalone holds your head in both of his hands. His thumbs brush over your cheekbones, and he brings you closer to place his lips against your forehead; leaving chaos in its wake.
“The doctors told me your head suffered from injury after the impact. I feared I might’ve underestimated it. Your mind is already filling these gaps of your mind with horrid ideas. I can’t imagine how hard it must be for you.”
He looks solemnly down at you.
“That, my dear, is why you should stay here. I can take care of you until you’ve recovered. I’ll call a private doctor for a check-up. He should be able to tell you if it’s advised to go home or stay under someone else’s care.”
You nod your head. 
It’s slow and unsure, but you show your trust in Pantalone. 
You’ve been friends for so long… He wouldn’t lie to you.
You trust him.
After all…
A ludicrous laugh escapes your lips at the notion.
“—as if a woman would be running at your property. It’s nonsensical, right?”
He smiles;
“Yes, it is.”
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