#I hear this a lot and I hate to repeat it cause.... I hear it SO much but
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violetjedisylveon · 1 day ago
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previously from this anonymous , I imagine that the whole people would make a move towards Wukong while carrying his cubs.
What would every family members now to Wukong like the dbk fam, mk gangs and the monkey’s including macaque react and act towards anyone that flirts and tries to force Wukong into this he hates.
Demon sees Wukong(stilling carrying the cub) realizing that he is weak to fight and defend himself: hey cutie~ you seem like u don’t have a mate yet, I could be your ma-
*gets cut of by mk putting his staff towards their neck* “sorry, I couldn’t hear what you said, could you repeat that slowly for me” “MK NO-“
*Wukong then gets almost kidnapped by a white tiger to then the white tiger get beaten up by PIF and Dbk and redson*
PIF trying to check on Wukong and his cubs while wanting to kill this dirty bastard while dbk and redson with his technology is beating the crap out of this tiger, while Wukong is kinda scared but felt nice to be protected by people that he is being cared for*
*Wukong is again getting flirted by some demon to then see the true macaque that saw all this*
demon: hey beautiful~ wanna make me your husband, I can be a su-
*macaque appears out of nowhere and kills that demon*
Wukong: I should yell and be angry at him but…..I think I am loving this macaque acting like this towards anyone for me
(BONUS)
*cubs sees strangers/demons close to their mama*: *hisses and chirps angrily like his baba(macaque) acts like *translation* “GET AWAY FROM MAMA, YOU STAY AWAY FROM MAMA, YOU DIRTY MONSTER”
Mama wukong just trying his best not to laugh at this scene he is seeing: …….they really do act like their baba😅
Macaque: I’m so proud of them🥹
previous
Well, for anyone to flirt with Wukong they'd have to get onto FFM where he is under house arrest by his friends because they are not risking anything.
Somehow some people crazy, and horny, enough do get onto FFM, none of them can get into the waterfall cave, but Wukong gets jump scared quite a few times when he leaves it that's for sure!
Everyone basically has MK's reaction of "BE GONE THOT!" at anyone who even looks at Wukong the wrong way.
That tiger is super dead, like, good luck surviving a protective bull family, and if he survives, just wait til MK hears about it, he's so toast. Wukong gets all warm and fuzzy seeing people care about him like this again, it's really nice.
Macaque is super protective, and super mad random horny demons somehow end up getting onto FFM and harassing his mate, Wukong needs better protection seals, the seals are weakening cause babies are draining his magic. Wukong is super into it, that's so hot to him.
Azure definitely gets a whole lot of shit for the stunt he pulled with the scroll, the DBK fam don't even hear him out when he reveals he's captured Wukong they immediately go on the attack cause WTF! He's pregnant and needs to save his energy!
Azure did not at this point know he was pregnant and worries because of the scroll breaking something really bad happened to Wukong.
He doesn't care about the cubs, but if the scroll breaking caused him to miscarry, then that could really damage Wukong.
(if your wanna interpret Azure as in love with Wukong here you can)
Azure's toast for all that shit.
Yes! Rumble and Savage are feisty little babies who are very protective of their mapa! They saw Macaque get like that one time and well, monkey see monkey do ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Macaque is very proud of his little spitfires, they do such a great job protecting their mapa, and he gives them lots of cuddles and treats!
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I did welding too I have to say I was horrible here are some pictures though!
Your welding is much better Ansley smoother I had no clue what I was doing as the teacher wasn't too good at showing in details how to do it!
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Those welds honestly aren't bad!!!
You say you were doing them in highschool? It's honestly super cool you got to start that early!! But if it's a high school class, I can definitely imagine how a teacher may not give enough demonstration before throwing you into the frey
I mean, I'm in a college class and even my teacher doesn't give me enough demonstration-- I got two seconds of him showing me brazing and then I was given the torch and flux 😭
Anyway, for all you were given, I'm actually impressed‼️‼️ Especially with pic #2, #6, and #7‼️ Most of those pics are better than I've seen from some of my more advanced classmates so even if your welds aren't the best, they're at least up there 🙏🙏
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alinedreams · 2 months ago
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Deaf people don't know how freaking blessed they are to not have to pass through 24/7 auditive torture...
#sensory processing disorder#auditive processing disorder#even if i didn't have spd so much of what triggers my past traumas is freaking auditive#also not even listening to music is worth it because a lot of it just sounds awful to my ears#even the few good things hearing has to offer are besmirched by my disorders and c-ptsd#so to me hearing anything at all is far more of a curse than a blessing#my life would be leagues less constantly agonizing if i could just lose all or at least most of my hearing#or at least enough of my hearing just so i could wear a hearing prosthetic where i could CONTROL THE VOLUME OF THE WORLD#this post was brought by MY MOTHER'S FREAKING DEVIL DOG WHO DECIDED TO BARK OUT LOUD RIGHT AS I WAS SHUTTING MY FREAKING EYES TO SLEEP#THAT EVIL HELLHOUND DOESN'T EVEN ALLOW ME TO FRIGGEN SLEEP#i just wanna die but if i can't die at least let me go deaf#maybe let me go mute too. as a treat. i hate how my own voice sounds like so that would be a bonus#hate when people don't pay attention to ke not because i want attention but because i hate having to repeat things and hear myself twice#and autistic echolalia doesn't help matters any#i just wish i was either dead or deaf#i know my eyesight is also sensorially impaired but see there's something called eyelids that alleviate the issue#there's no such a thing as earlids#and even if the light is too bright we got those eyepatch thingies we use to sleep!#but for ears? not even earplugs are enough to sleep with no auditive agony.#i mean the light equivalent of a dog's bark would be having a phone lantern glowing eight into your eyes!#but even the phone light can cause immediate blindness while the bark won't make you go deaf unless it's 24/7 for decades#(and i don't think the Actual Houndoom will live that long. or at least *i* won't if things keep going like this.)
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calwoso · 25 days ago
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disappointment part 2
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you finally tell your sister and Marta why you’re here
Caro hasn't spoken a word to you the entire ride back from the match. She hasn't so much as glanced at you as you sit sullenly in the back seat as your first couple of attempts at making conversation were shot down by silence. Even Marta doesn't seem willing to chat for once.
When Caro finally pulls into the parking lot and switches off the engine, your hand immediately flies to the door handle, pulling at it impatiently to free yourself. It doesn't budge and you huff in annoyance.
"Child lock, really?" You say snippily at your sister who glances at you once in the rearview mirror.
"We're not going anywhere until you tell me what's going on." She tells you plainly, crossing her arms and continuing to face forwards.
You groan dramatically, trying the door once more in vain, "I told you, I just wanted to visit."
Your sister remains silent, staring stubbornly ahead even though you can see the clench of her jaw as she tries not to start the argument again. Getting no joy from her you try her partner who is shifting uneasily in her seat.
"Marta, come on, she's being ridiculous." You half-whine.
Caro's head twitches every so slightly as Marta takes a deep breath and remains quiet.
"You want to get out, you tell me why you're here. And you tell me why Mamma sounded so pissed off on the phone this morning too." Caro repeats herself.
Tipping your head back against the seat you try to out wait your sister. She's always had less patience than you, and maybe if you just shut up and say nothing she'll let you out of the damn car.
It's barely two minutes of silence before Marta says, hesitantly, "Caro, maybe we should just-"
"No." Caro says sharply. "She wants to act like an adult then she can sit there and tell me why she's here."
It's the guilt, you think, of being the cause of Caro snapping at her partner. You like Marta, you never meant to cause such an issue.
"Fine! You want to know why I'm here and why our parents are so furious? It's because I'm not you, Caro. I'm not you, I don't have anything ahead of me to go and achieve." Your voice is too loud for the enclosed space but it only gets louder as you grow more upset. "Because they spent two hours yelling at me yesterday about how I have no prospects, no path forward! How I'm wasting my life and...and how I'll never be you and instead I’m just a disappointment. And I knew you wouldn't get it but I thought at least my sister might have my back in all this."
You hate the way you cry when you get angry.
"And I know I should have called ahead, but I just needed out of there. You don't know what it's like to live under your shadow. But I thought I could go to the one place someone might actually be pleased to see me!" You're sniffling pathetically now, swiping at your cheeks furiously. You feel like a kid again begging your sister not to move away because you'd miss her.
"But I get it now, so open the fucking door so I can get out of here!" You yell.
Caro sits stock still as only the sound of your heavy breathing and sniffling remains. Eventually it's Marta that presses a button on the centre console and you hear the locks disengage. You're out of the car like a shot, slamming the door behind you a little more than perhaps necessary.
You turn and stomp away down the street. You can't help the way your ears strain for the sound of Caro's voice in case she calls out for you. But it doesn't come.
Back in the car, Caro sits rigid. the keys dangle uselessly in the ignition. Marta's hand hovers above her own door handle, caught in two minds about what to do. Her gaze darts between Caro’s frozen profile and the spot where you had disappeared around the corner.
“Amor” she says softly, reaching to brush her partner’s shoulder. “We can’t just let her—”
Caro doesn't say anything but her head nods jerkily and Marta is opening her door and running after you, leaving her partner stuck in the driver's seat.
You haven't gotten too far, but you have managed to cross the road and duck into the park opposite.
"Wait! Please," She calls out to you from across the road, just as you're about to disappear further into the greenery.
You stop at the sound, and Marta doesn't miss the way you seem genuinley shocked she's come after you. The Spaniard isn't sure how long you'll stay still as she bounces on the balls of her feet waiting for the lights to change so she can cross the busy road.
The light to walk flickers on and she jogs across the street and up to you, not giving you a chance before she's sweeping you into a bone crushing hug.
You try not to melt into it. Your family aren't known for being the most outwardly affectionate and you had wondered how your sister had ended up with someone who seems to love so freely.
But it's hard not to give in as Marta runs a hand up and down your back and hugs you closer. Your tears that had barely stopped, start again and you sob like you're a child again.
Marta doesn’t let go until your sobs taper into shaky breaths, your forehead still pressed into her shoulder. When she finally pulls back, she keeps her hands on your arms, studying your face with concern. “Okay, two choices,” she says, “We either go home, or we sit on that bench over there so we can talk properly.”
Going back and facing your sister after having a full blown meltdown in the back of her Cupra does not fill you with joy.
So you collapse onto the sun-warmed wood, and Marta plops down beside you, close enough that her knee knocks against yours. For a moment, she says nothing, just lets the park’s chatter fill the silence. When she finally speaks, her voice softens. “Your parents… they’re wrong, you know.”
You pick at a splinter on the bench. “They’re not entirely wrong. I don’t have a plan. I just, I don’t have a passion, I’m not like Caro, I don’t know what I’m doing.”
Marta snorts. “Your sister does not know what she’s going.” She bumps your shoulder. “You think Caro’s got it all figured out? Dios mío, I promise you she doesn’t.”
A laugh hiccups out of you, unexpected. Marta’s grin widens.
“But still, at least she always knew what she wanted. Had something to aim for. I’m just…stuck, with no idea what to do.” You sigh, kicking gently at a loose rock underneath your foot.
Marta hums in quiet agreement. She can’t argue against that, nor can she imagine not knowing or at least having an idea of what you want to do.
She doesn’t really know what to say to you, doesn’t have a way to take away your worries. So she settles on assuaging them as best she can.
“I don’t mean to sound patronising, but you’re young. You have time, despite what others may say. Comparing yourself and being compared to Caroline isn’t fair.” Marta pauses for a beat. “Your life isn’t made in your teen years or even your twenties. Or even your thirties I suppose. I mean, what am I going to do when I retire? I haven’t got a clue!”
You still don’t look wholly convinced which the Spaniard supposes is fair. You’re clearly still hurt and downtrodden from your argument with your parents and feeling raw at the way Caro took your sudden appearance as an intrusion rather than a request for help.
She really needs to have a word with both Norweigans about actually speaking to one another when everyone has had some time to calm down.
“We’ll figure it out. We can brainstorm ideas for what you want to do and you can stay with us for as long as you need.” She assures you.
“Doubt Caro would want you saying that.” You mumble a little pitifully even if your heart warms at the obvious care from your sister’s partner. “It’s hard enough getting her to respond to my texts, she didn’t even tell me you’d moved in together. I know I’m younger than her but she used to always have time for me.”
Your bottom lip wobbles and you bite down on it until it stops.
“I know it’s awful but she was so miserable at Wolfsburg and so she was always calling home and then, then she moved here and met you and it’s like she forgot all about me.” You confess, hastily adding. “I don’t want her to be miserable and I really like you and you clearly make her happy. But I was just left behind and all our parents could see was how little I achieved in comparison to her.”
Marta doesn’t really know what to say to that, a little pit of guilt forming in her stomach as she wonders if she’s taken Caro away from someone who needs her. But you keep talking before she can figure out how to respond.
“Is it so bad for me to just want to be average and not high flying and just live a stupid boring life?” You bury your head in your hands. “I never asked to have a sister who’s a footballer, I never wanted to be one either, so why am I being compared to her?”
“I know,” Marta pulls you against her side. “I know, it’s not fair. You can do whatever you want to do and that can change as much as you want.”
You laugh wetly and with a self deprecating little snort, “I don’t think I’ve cried this much since I was a kid.”
Marta doesn’t think you’ve cried that much at all, really. She reckons she would’ve cried an awful lot more if her parents had said those things to her at 18. It’s easy to forget with you, given your general sunny disposition, but you are very much Caro’s sister and the pair of you clearly both struggle with difficult emotions.
"Let's go home for now." She settles on, tugging you to your feet. "We can deal with everything else later. We have time." She suggests, not really giving you too much time to think about it as she already begins to steer you back the way you came.
You like the sound of having time, though. The idea that maybe you have enough time to figure everything out with Marta's help, if not your sister's, that maybe everyone will back off enough for you to breathe.
It’s silent when you and Marta arrive back to the Spaniard’s home and your heart drops at the idea that your outburst may have scared your sister off from her own home. But there’s a muffled sound from further inside and you frown at Marta before following her through towards the master bedroom.
The door is shut but as you near the sound becomes clearer and you realise it’s your sister’s voice, your sister’s extremely pissed off voice speaking rapidly and agitatedly in Norwegian. It’s Marta’s turn to frown at you, unable to keep up with the language at this speed.
“She’s still practically a child, definitely still a teenager! She’s not supposed to know what to do.” Caro snaps and although you’ve heard and been apart of enough arguments with your sister to know her temper, it still makes you wince. “No, Mamma you’re not listening. How I was at 18 wasn’t normal. She’s a good kid, she’s smart, funny, friendly, everything I wasn’t at that age. She has time. She doesn’t have to figure it all out.”
You swallow thickly as you listen, you had honestly thought you were all cried out but maybe not.
“And to call her a disappointment is unacceptable. Whether you were worried or not about her future or whatever it may be. She’s a good person, her own person, and she’s your daughter.” Caro’s voice despite being loud cracks a little and you hear Marta sniff too and you want to check on her but you’re also rooted to the spot. “She can stay here for a while until you’ve remembered what a wonderful child you have and she can use it as a holiday. Goodbye Mamma.”
There’s silence after that, aside from the sound of the blood rushing in your ears. You don’t think you’ve heard your sister yell at your parents, not out of true anger. And certainly not on your behalf. When another few seconds pass and you still hear nothing from the other side of the door you tentatively knock on the wood.
“Just a minute, amor.” Caro calls back in Spanish.
You can’t help but snort and reply, “Try again, it’s me.”
The door swings open almost immediately afterwards and Caro sighs, relieved, when she lays eyes on you. “Don’t run away like that.” She tells you sternly, the effect somewhat ruined by her own tear tracks.
But she sweeps you into a tight hug before you can point that out. You honestly can’t remember the last time your sister hugged like this. Not since you were much smaller instead of the inch of height difference between you both now.
“You yelled at Mamma.” You say, muffled against her shoulder.
“She was wrong about you, and cruel.” Caro explains as if it’s simple. “You can stay here, and lounge about and enjoy the sun for as long as you want. There’s no rush. At all.” Her arms squeeze tighter around you and you believe every word.
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might write some little one shots within this universe at some point in the future but for now this is where it ends
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scarletcomalies · 2 months ago
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the outside world has failed you
Wanda Maximoff x Fem Reader
Word count: 6,253
Warnings: 18+ content, mention of cockroaches and bedbugs, mention of contract-killing, Natasha x Reader, I criticize the church a lot, blasphemy, caning as a punishment, manipulation, masochism, oral sex, edging, dacryphilia, strap-on usage, hair-pulling, slamming, degrading, angst, fluff.
A/N: Hi! I'm sorry for disappearing, but in so few months, so much has happened. It has taken a toll on me, and I was in no mood for anything, in many ways. I am recovering, though! I love it here and I'm glad I was able to write a little something hehe. Watching AHS Asylum for the fourth time does things to you. 😮‍💨
Sister Wanda Maximoff didn't make your plan to take advantage of the church as easy as you thought it would be.
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You were not going to endure another god-awful day in that abyss you called life. You simply could not. Nothing particularly happened, you simply collapsed.
Your job in this economy did not allow you to support rent, food, services, all that went with being independent. So many exhausting hours for so little pay. Just so when you finally returned home, the first thing you saw were multiple eviction notices on your door, reminding you that you were on the verge of being homeless.
So, when you opened your door with push, the inside was not very welcoming either, as the holes in your furniture and under your broken sink were the perfect place for cockroaches to breed in droves, causing you to find a few over here and there. At least they lived rent free, you thought.
You ate microwavable or precooked food, the cheapest you could find, and proceeded to go to sleep, hoping the bedbugs wouldn't cause you any more health problems than you already had from the quality of sleep and food you provided your body with.
And then, you slept four hours, you got up to work, you came back home, you repeated.
Well, the sole exception was your upstairs neighbor, Natasha Romanoff. A Russian immigrant on the run from the authorities for her involvement as an accomplice to Clint Barton, a notorious contract killer. Barton, lacking the courage to face imprisonment with dignity, betrayed his loyal partner, declaring, "If I go down, you go down with me".
Now a fugitive, Natasha cut and dyed her hair blonde and resorted to phone scams to survive. “Fucking cyber education”, you could hear her yell from downstairs, usually followed by the sound of her cell phone hitting the ground (your ceiling). You deduced it was because fewer and fewer people were falling for the bullshit of a $500,000 prize.
The sex with her was good, too good to be true. You weren't happy about her misfortune, but you were grateful to whoever was smart enough not to fall for that classic scam, because you knew that after that, she would get to take out her frustration on you as soon as you got home from work. That was the only means by which you could secrete a little dopamine, a little... happiness.
“I hate this life,” you once commented, clinging to her as she rode out the ground-breaking orgasm she gave you.
“Hmmm, bullshit,” she growled. ”I can't go out and buy fucking cigarretes without the fear of some asshole recognizing me from the wanted signs and ratting me out,” you could feel her back muscles tensing again. “I can't engage in anything too scandalous, legal or illegal, because any false move will take me back to Russia. And don't make me detail what prison is like in Russia,” she added, quickening her movements and panting slightly. Your eyes rolled, and against your will, the need began to simmer inside you once again. “Don't come and tell me your life is difficult. Figure it out! God... damn it!”
“What do you propose I do?” You asked her, once the overstimulation of two orgasms in a row had subsided enough to allow you to formulate something more than whimpers and moans.
“Go to the nuns congregation,” she shrugged, as she buttoned her pants. They were somewhat tight, which made visible the bulge formed by the strap-on she used on you.
“Fuck you!” You exclaimed.
“I'm serious. They love to feel like they're saving souls,” she justified. “Tell them you want to let God into your life, and just like that you get three meals a day and a warm bed. You deserve a chance in life."
Okay, maybe you could have gone on to apply for other jobs and in one of them you might've been lucky to get hired, but your day-to-day life had mentally drained you so much that you didn't think you were capable of making one more effort to survive.
It wasn't fair. The people working in the church enjoyed every comfort simply by feeding people's beliefs in something greater. They stood before crowds reading teachings they often didn't apply to their own lives, but that didn't matter. All they needed to do was make people feel good about themselves for sacrificing one hour of their Sunday to listen. People gave money to the church for this. They granted the church privileges for this, like tax exemption. Meanwhile, you did pay your taxes.
Natasha was right. If a simple practice of a religion was going to give you all that, more than your skills or abilities would, you might as well take it. After all, it was divine justice to privilege yourself from the church that privileged itself from the people.
Everything went smoothly, for you were a master in words and conviction. If only you had the opportunity to go to college, you would be using those skills to build a career of your liking, maybe laws or literature. But there you were, reorienting the reason for the misfortunes in your life to a motive to strengthen your faith. You even talked about a dream where you received a message where God commanded you to serve Him, and you dropped a couple of tears to make it believable. They loved it!
From then on, your days were consumed by correspondence lessons, spiritual readings that stirred nothing within you, and the hollow act of pretending to pray mentally. It was excruciatingly monotonous, devoting yourself to something that doesn’t align with the core of who you were. However, the only solace came from the feeling of a full stomach, the embrace of a bed where you could finally surrender to real rest, and the relief of having left behind the life that once tormented you.
If that weren’t enough, Natasha remained present in your life. There was no love, perhaps not even affection, but there was familiarity. You were each other's person to look forward to after an exhausting, unsuccesful day.
Therefore, every night, she would appear at your window, her wide smile showing beneath the shadow of her hood.
She would fuck you hard, keeping in mind the exciting fact that, despite covering your mouth with her firm hand, a moan could probably be heard if she dared to let go or if you didn't control yourself.
The danger of someone discovering an Aspirant being thrusted deep by another woman whose reward for finding her exceeded a million dollars gave you the most delicious orgasms you had ever had in your life.
All your needs were taken care of, and all you had to do was pretend that this was your calling.
Until Sister Wanda Maximoff noticed your lack of interest. The other Aspirants glowed with marvel, their eyes burning with the will to learn during every lesson. They bombarded her with so many questions that each class stretched at least an extra half hour. But overall, they worshiped her as the living embodiment of what they could only dream to become.
But you remained sitting quietly, your gaze steady but lacking the usual awe radiating from your classmates. It wasn't shyness, for Sister Wanda had taught many shy Aspirants before, it was as if you existed on a separate plane of existence, observing from a distance instead of immersing yourself.
So she deliberately picked on you, persistently directing her questions at you regardless of your ‘fellow’ Aspirants' raised, insisting hands.
What exasperated her the most was your response to her gentle reprimands when you answered incorrectly; your attitude matched, perhaps even surpassed, the apathy you showed toward her lessons. The sole thing you were eager about was to demonstrate how little she mattered to you.
How wrong she was to believe private lessons would change anything. She assumed whatever shit show you were trying to pull would crumble when it was just the two of you, face to face. She thought you showed defiance only because you were among other Aspirants, who would devastate at the sight of their sweet, dear Sister being —justifiably— hard on someone. But no, you were insolent and that was all there was to it.
Unfortunately for you, Sister Wanda didn't have her group of adoring students around to see her now, leaving her free to do whatever she pleased with you.
"Damn you!" She slammed her Bible shut, after she made one last attempt to kindly ask you to make an effort to pay attention. You barely had time to register her words before she was standing—no, looming in front of you. "Listen," she hissed, her breath sharp against your face. The smell of cigarretes was evident. "I don't care why you're here. I only care that you are here. And as long as you are here, you're going to listen to my lesson. You're going to care. And one way or another, you're going to love me for it.”
That was the heart of it, wasn't it? You hadn't knelt, hadn't lapped at her heels like the others, and that was enough to wound her. Enough to make her angry. You could see it in her eyes, controlled fury, a slow-burning arrogance that refused to be challenged.
"Bend over," she ordered, signalling towards her desk with her emerald-green eyes.
You met her eyes, and in that moment, you knew she saw your rage, your disgust, your perplexity barely restrained beneath your clenched jaw.
"Excuse me?" Your voice was trembling of pure impotence, as the room itself seemed to contract around you.
"Bend over," she repeated. “Or… don't. You can always go back to that job—”
And before she could even complete her sentence, you were bent over her desk.
"Normally, I’d let you choose," she mused, her voice thick with condescension. "But you’ve been so bad, you don’t even deserve that.”
The closet doors creaked open behind you. Wooden. Heavy. Old.
The sound pierced the silence, a whistle of something cutting through the air, followed by a firm whip exploding across your flesh.
You sucked in a sharp breath.
It stuck in your throat, strangled by disbelief, both from the action and the inimaginable pain.
Your body jerked forward against the desk, as a high-pitched cry escaped your lips before you could stop it.
The wooden cane struck again, and again, and again.
Sister Wanda was known for being methodical, and her punishments weren't the exception, for she let each strike sink in before delivering the next.
Your fingers clawed at the barnished wood of her desk, intending to stay still, to deny her the satisfaction of seeing you squirm and suffer.
But it was impossible. The burning sensation radiating from your ass across your whole body, had you sobbing openly, with your pride as bruised as your skin.
"Please," you whimpered, choked with pathetic attempts to inhale some air. "I‐I'm sorry, please...”
She hummed with indifference. The same indifference you once gave her during her lessons. Divine justice.
Her cane tapped thoughtfully against your tender flesh, making you flinch. You couldn't take another single one.
"What did Christ say to Peter after the resurrection?” Just another cynical test. You should've seen it coming.
The answer was somewhere within the depths of your distressed mind. But the sting of open skin, made your thoughts slow.
"Well?" she pressed, and the cane lifted from your ass.
"Simon son of John, do you love me?”
Through your sobs, you heard the creak of the cabinet opening again, the soft sound of the cane being returned to its place. Your flesh throbbed in time with your heartbeat, and you knew you wouldn't be able to sit comfortably for days.
With gentle hands that moments ago had wielded the cane, she carefully smoothed down your tunic, her touch now impossibly tender.
"There now, sweet girl," she murmured, her voice honey-like and soothing. Her fingers traced the tear tracks on your cheeks, wiping away the remnants of the evidence of your sorrow. "You took your punishment so well.”
Every alert in your rational mind that would dcream at you to stay away was turned off. You knew it when you found yourself melting into her touch, craving the comfort she offered. And she looked down at you with adoration when she found nothing but submission in your eyes, as she cradled your face between her palms.
"Such a good girl for me now, isn't that right?" he whispered, and the praise… the praise had your earlier fear dissolving under her careful ministrations. "This is all I wanted from you, darling, just to see you truly present, truly here with me."
She drew you closer, letting you rest your forehead against her shoulder as her fingers threaded through your hair. The scent of chapel incense and that hint of cigarettes enveloped you, and you found yourself breathing it in deeply, letting it ground you.
“This is what happens when you let yourself be guided, when you submit to proper instruction," her lips brushed your earshell as she spoke. "Will you be good for me from now on?"
You nodded against her shoulder, unable and unwilling to resist the tempting implication she made. If you behaved, you would have more of these precious moments.
And this alone gave you more purpose than anything else since you arrived to the monastery.
You became aware of it in the same way a candle becomes aware of fire, at first, just a taste of heat, then a flame that tangles in the wax until it consumes it all.
You became an active participant in her lessons, a constant presence who made sure to be seen, to be noticed. You knew Sister Wanda liked your enthusiasm, but it wasn't just her approval you sought. You wanted her recognition.
And so, when you weren't taking her lessons, you were reading, studying, making sure your application made you stand out among the other Aspirants. All so that you would be her favorite girl.
She usually saw you reading under one of the garden's trees. You had chosen the one that was the closest to the hall, she noticed. She couldn't miss it if she was walking out of her office. It was adorable.
If she had time, she would stop by your side, looking at the book in your hands. She would take the tome gently, making sure that her slender fingers brushed yours, even if for a second, and her arm subsequently found its around you in an almost unconscious, protective manner.
"Do you have any questions?" She would inquire. And even though you didn't —unsurprisingly so—, you pretended to need clarification, any excuse to let her closeness linger a few seconds longer, not ready to be apart from her yet.
It had taken hold of you. The need of her touch.
Before, reading and prayer were mere obligations, mechanical routines that you did just because you had to. Now, they had become rituals charged with intention, directed towards something greater; her.
If you prayed fervently, if you participated enthusiastically, if you were everything she expected of you, rest assured she would seek you out every time, just to remind you that you did not go unnoticed by her.
"It was so good," she purred, her hand sliding over your lower back.
And, of course, she noticed your every gesture. Every held breath, every tiny tilt of your body in her direction.
She had conditioned other students to obey her in the same way, but they did not respond to her touch as you did that day after she bent you over the desk. Not only did you not flinch, you melted.
They obeyed for fear of being punished again. But, it seemed you had even forgotten all about it.
You didn't look at her with terror. You looked at her with longing.
Sure, it was normal to look for approval. That's all it was. A conditioned reflex, a survival instinct. To make sure you didn't get any more punishment.
But you... you weren't just looking for her approval.
You were looking for her.
And she didn't know which was worse, the reverse effect it had inadvertently caused in you, or the one it was causing in her.
She should have stopped when she had the chance, when she noticed that her threatening attempts to impose fear, meaning by grabbing your face, squeezing your shoulder or resting her hand on your back, for you were, in reality, caresses. Caresses that you evidently lacked throughout your life.
"One way or another, you're going to love me for it," she had established, but the another way was not the one she usually applied, the one she used to know so well.
The admiration of others fed her ego, and gave her that sense of power and control to which she had long ago become addicted. But you had made that seem insignificant compared to what you provided her.
She was fully aware that you didn't want to be like her. Hell, she knew exactly why you joined the congregation.
It was something far more significant than the admiration she had initially tried to kindle within you.
It was submission.
And therefore every slightest caress became a bottomless pit for her, for both of you. And both, without fear, fell.
It was everything you were looking for.
So much so that, when Natasha touched your window, you felt nothing. And you had reached the point of believing that there was no point in continuing to do something that no longer had any meaning for you.
So, as she was about to climb in, you stopped her.
"I'm reading," you said without looking up from the book in your hands, signaling to her that you weren't going to move from there.
Natasha paused for a second, just long enough for doubt to seep into her expression before pulling herself together.
"I can see that. Good for you.”
And still, she walked in. She did so as confidently as she always did, expecting no more permission than she believed belonged to her.
"I can't do this anymore," you stated, firm this time.
Natasha raised an eyebrow, somewhere between mockery and skepticism. She swept her gaze over you, that quick, almost bored assessment. Then, she chuckled.
"What?" She asked in mock disbelief. "Are you going to tell me that you received a calling from the Lord to give yourself to him? Is this what it is? Are you going to practice chastity?”
You denied quickly.
"No, don't be ridiculous.”
It wasn't faith, not in the way she implied. It was devotion, but to someone who was there, who did respond. There was something greater than mindless pleasure, something more real than the filling of your needy hole. You had found someone to exist for, someone who saw beyond the fleeting instant and looked at you, not just what she could take from you.
She tilted her head, with the same expression of one who already knows the answer but wants to hear you say it anyway.
"You met someone else," she asserted.
"No..." it was an instinctive reflex that, upon reaching your tongue, lost its form, dissolving into something uncertain. "Maybe. I don't know."
Had you, really? Wanda hadn't touched you in that way, the way Natasha did, urgently, hungrily. And yet what she did to you had been more than anything you'd ever felt. Her fingers glided over your skin with a lightness that didn't demand, that didn't take. There was something in the way she looked at you, not with possession, but with recognition. As if you were someone, not something.
You didn't know if it was equal, but it was better. Much better.
There was a second of silence. Then Natasha let out a dry laugh.
"Well, I'd be damned," she muttered with a half-smile, not taking her eyes off you. "Just... think about her if you want. I had a long day.”
And you agreed. It was the only way to know if this bordered on a level of attraction that was new to you.
When Natasha fucked you, you closed your eyes, and you imagined those pink lips, those big emerald green eyes, that unseen body hiding under that habit.
No. Not like this.
If you were doing this with Wanda, she'd be stroking your hair. She'd kiss your cheeks. She'd make sure you felt how much she appreciated having your presence beneath her, pleasing her. Overall, she'd make sure you were enjoying yourself too.
Because you were somebody.
You opened your eyes, and you pulled Natasha's hand away from your mouth, with a movement that was not abrupt, but definite.
"Caress me," you commanded.
Natasha frowned.
"You're insane," she panted between thrusts. You didn't blame her for saying it. Maybe you were.
"Do it," you insisted, with the certainty of one who has made a decision with no turning back. "Or this will be the last time.”
She rolled her eyes impatiently. But she agreed. Without love, without affection, with a mechanical manner that barely mimicked what you had asked.
"No, this isn't working," you growled, nudging her gently. You didn't want to make her feel like this was her fault, it really wasn't. You simply began to crave for something she was no longer capable of giving you.
"I agree, let me do my thing," she replied, slamming deeper inside you to reassert her dominance. You knew she knew what you were referring to, the fact that her flings during the night were no longer working for you. But she wasn't going to admit it, because she wanted to keep using you, seeing you.
And no, you had a say in this.
"Natasha, I don't want you anymore!" You exclaimed, perhaps louder than you should have in the middle of the night when everyone was supposed to be asleep.
She pulled back, just enough to glance in your direction, as if to silently confirm the truth of your words. Within the depths of your eyes, she found the answer. Therefore she stepped back with deliberate nonchalance and adjusted her pants, maintaining her composure in the shifting tide of the moment.
You thought she was going to refute, as it seemed very important to her to leave her house, to risk being found just to 'take out her frustrations on you'. She could have looked for anyone, but she wanted you. And perhaps the reason would remain a mystery.
"Call me when that cheesiness wears off," she stated matter-of-factly, and retreated from your room through the window.
And with that, you thought you were off the hook.
You thought.
You were under your tree, your now shelter, when you saw Wanda come out of her office. Her footsteps echoed on the floor, quick and heavy, so different from her usual gait. She was furious, you knew.
You didn't alert yourself, you thought it wasn't about you, that if you were doing what she expected from you, without fail, why would she be angry?
But then, instead of taking the path to the hallway, as she always did, she walkes you. Her eyes showed no gentleness. There was no tenderness in her face. But what had happened? Everything seemed to be in order. Why... this?
In one sudden movement, she bent down and, with a violence that made you lose your breath, she lifted you up suddenly, pulling your hair towards her, forcing you to stumble, to stagger, all the way to her office. She didn't care about your whines, and, your desperate pleas to explain what was happening.
And once inside, the door closed with a clang that chilled your blood, and proceeded to bend you over the desk by slamming the side of your face against it. There were no orders. There were no requests. There was no room for choice.
No explanation, not a single word spoken, like you didn't deserve any of that. It couldn't be real. Not again. Not like this. She was treating you... badly. And you didn't know why, or what you had done wrong.
"I took you for so many things," she began, and the sound of the closet doors where she kept her canes chilled your skin just like the last time. "Insolent, disdainful, opportunist... and I thought I'd fixed you."
You choked, your throat closed up with unshed tears. You didn't understand. You couldn't understand.
The prospect of getting caned didn't even occupy your mind at that moment. It was the torture of knowing that you let her down, that everything you had done, all your effort, had been in vain, that consumed you to the core.
"Y-you did!" you cried, trying to cling to some hope, some justification, looking for some way to explain what you didn’t even know you did. "I've done everything you asked, and more! I don't understand!"
The way she dismissed your words with a curt hum, and proceeded to lift your tunic, was a silent communication that everything you did for her wasn't enough to forgive nor forget what she was about to punish you for.
"Yes," she said, caressing your bare cheeks, which still held the memories of your first punishment. "Except for the fact that you're a filthy slut, fucking a criminal every night in your room."
Your skin bristled at her accusation. She felt it under her fingertips, and that made her more relentless.There was no point in applying those impecable lying techniques that had brought you to this point, if ultimately, your body was at her mercy, and it did not lie.
"Who told you?" you could barely articulate. How could anyone ever dare to touch something so sacred to you?
"No one!" She exclaimed.
It had been one of your fellow Aspirants. She was heading to the bathroom that night, rubbing the sleep from her eyes, when she heard the hushed moans and accelerated breaths through your door.
And when she heard your apparent fling was about to slip out of your window, she followed.
She didn’t go far, just enough to reach Natasha out, grip her shoulder, and turn her around to reveal her identity. That cost her a broken nose. However, it was worth it. So worth it.
Because she hated you, everyone hated you. Why were you Wanda's favorite? You hated her lessons, you were rude to her, and when you started doing what everyone did, you got praised for it?
She was supposed to belong to all of them! Equally. So if she had to sabotage your relationship to take back what was theirs, then so be it.
First thing in the morning, she told Wanda everything.
"I don't understand you, (Y/N)!" She continued, whipping you three times in a row, the contact coursing through your entire body. You could have sworn you felt an electric current run from your head to your feet. And worse than the first time. Much worse. Oh, compared to what you felt now, those moments seemed like paradise. "Here, you have it all!"
Wanda's jealousy, the shadows of her anger, made her apply way more force than she intended to. And from your end, the realization that you had failed the one person who had ever made you feel you were worth anything, who had made you believe you weren't invisible, made you the perfect recipient for her fury.
You were vulnerable, not resistant, for you defeatedly accepted this as just a little bit of the hell you deserved for having disappointed Wanda. Your Wanda.
"You got everything you wanted," she continued. "Everything you wanted in exchange for being my good girl. And isn't that enough? You had to look outside for what you could have here, with me?"
Before you could apologize, or beg for mercy, you felt the touch of her face against the fabric of your panties, where she inhaled deeply.
"I should have known my baby girl wanted to be fucked, hm?" She commented, more softly than before. The scent of your involuntary arousal soothed her unlike any other. "My bad.”
“I… I'm so… I'm so stupid,” you whimpered, your words laced with embarrasment. Your tears had already formed a small, glistening puddle on the surface of her desk, reflecting the dim candlelight.
"Shhh, nothing to be ashamed of," she whispered in your ear. Her body pressed against your back with almost reverent care, as though she wanted to hold you rather than crush you. After all, you were someone fragile, someone precious that deserved protection from the claws of the outside world. "Oh, my darling," she cooed, with a gentleness so sincere that it made you forget, if only for an instant, the trust that had been broken. "No more tears," she commanded softly.
She stuck out her tongue and slid it tenderly over your cheek, gathering the salty trace of your regret.
She extended her tongue, moving it with deliberate tenderness across your tear-stained cheek, collecting each salty droplet that marked your sorrow.
The warm, wet sensation of her tongue against your skin, the taste of your regret, provoked her to elicit a deep, satisfied moan that resonated through her whole body and into yours.
It shouldn't have felt like salvation, but it did. And naturally, you yearned for more, as you did with form of contact that she could offer you.
And, with the same quiet desperation of a sinner seeking absolution, you turned your head, parted your lips, and let the tip of your tongue meet hers. She stilled for a moment, just a moment, before answering you kindly. A gentle meeting of tongues, tentative at first, but then so natural and carefree. Like you had done this a thousand times before. In a previous lifetime, perhaps.
The kiss deepened, her tongue exploring yours with the same careful attention she gave to every aspect of your being. Her mouth moved against yours with a rhythm that spoke of ownership, of belonging, each sweep of her tongue claiming territory that had always been rightfully hers. Not anyone else’s.
The taste of her, sharp and sweet like consecrated wine, filled your senses until there was nothing else. No past mistakes, no future uncertainties, just the perfect present of her mouth commanding yours.
Your heart thundered against her desk, no longer from fear but from the raw intensity of being truly seen, truly possessed. Each sigh you drew was heavy with the innate air of submission you emanated, sweeter than any prayer you'd ever offered. And she inhaled it blissfully.
"Out there, they only know how to take from you," she whispered against your lips. "But here, my precious girl, I'll make sure you get everything you need. No need to look outside ever again."
“Yes,” was the only thing you needed to say, and it was the only thing she needed to hear.
She left a kiss on your cheek, both as a thankful gesture and as a silent assurance before she knelt to the level of her desk where you were still bent over, now in front of her.
You felt her warm breath clash against the sensitive skin between your legs as she pushed your underwear to the side.
She trailed her tongue against your folds, making you gasp at the sudden foreign intrusion. No one has ever tasted you before. Natasha thought it was too intimate.
But screw Natasha. There you had everything you’d ever needed.
Her eyes widened in awe. She had just discovered a flavor so intoxicating, so essential, that she couldn’t imagine life before tasting it. And the last ounce of self-control vanished as she lunged forward, devouring your pussy with the desperation of a starved creature finally set free.
She wanted you to interiorize with every fiber of your being that this was where you belonged, under her ministrations, receiving the divine attention only she could provide.
It was overwhelming, not just physically, but emotionally. Your breath caught in your throat as your eyes shut tight and your head struggled to process the intensity of it all.
"Oh, Wanda!" You whimpered, your voice thick with need for more. Always needed more of her, didn't you? The words barely made it past your lips before dissolving into desperate gasps.
It was all too much. The cool surface of the desk against your heated skin, the warmth of her mouth claiming you so intimately, the sting from your punishment mixing with rising pleasure until you couldn't distinguish between the two.
"Tell me where do you belong," she demanded, pulling back just so she could speak. The sudden absence of her tongue made you whine pathetically. You felt hollow inside.
"With you, only with you!" You vowed, proudly. "I've always been yours."
Your admission seemed to ignite something animalistic in her. She growled against your flesh, the vibrations making your thighs tremble.
Your hands fisted helplessly against the polished wood, seeking grounding as your body threatened to collapse under the assault of her mouth.
The world outside ceased to exist. There was only her mouth working you with devastating precision, only the building pressure deep in your core that threatened to tear you apart. Your consciousness narrowed to a singular point of pure feeling.
"Give it to me, my sweet girl," she murmured, her words muffled against your flesh.
Your body responded to her command before your mind could process it. Wave after wave of pleasure crashed over you, manifesting itself through your release, and she swallowed every drop of it. She wasn't going to stop until she made sure to dry you out.
Your vision blurred, spots of light dancing behind your closed eyelids as you succumbed completely to her dominance, that didn't seem to cease despite your surrender.
"Oh, p-please..." you gasped, though you weren't sure what you were begging for, to stop or to continue.
Regardless, she didn't stop, didn't even slow down. If anything, your pleas spurred her on, her tongue moving with renewed vigor as she worked you through your release. Your legs shook violently, and if not for her firm grip on your hips, you would have fell down like a ragdoll.
"Mine," she established, finally pulling back to admire her work. Your swollen, pink pussy throbbing with the aftershocks of your orgasm.
A rustle of fabric caught your attention, followed by the cool touch of silicone against your worn out hole. She leaned over you, pressing soft kisses along your spine as she aligned herself.
"My precious girl," she whispered, intertwining her fingers with yours on the desk. You turned your head to meet her gaze, overwhelmed by the tenderness in her eyes.
She pressed forward slowly, letting you adjust to the feeling of being filled. Her other hand caressed your cheek lovingly, wiping away the remnants of your tears. You leaned into her touch, turning to kiss her palm.
"Please, I want you," you breathed, squeezing her hand. "Only you, always you."
She began to move with gentle, measured thrusts, each one accompanied by sweet words of praise and affection.
She leaned down to press her lips against yours in a deep, passionate kiss. The new angle made you gasp into her mouth as she hit a particularly sensitive, spongy spot inside you.
"There, my love," she encouraged, maintaining the steady rhythm that was slowly building you towards another peak. "You're doing so good. Always making me so proud."
Her thrusts became more purposeful, but never lost their tenderness. One hand remained firmly clasped with yours while the other wrapped around your waist, holding you close as she fucked you thoroughly.
Your breath hitched as she increased her pace, each thrust now hitting deeper inside you. Her lips found yours again, swallowing your moans as she drove you closer to the edge. The feeling of fullness, of being completely possessed by her, was overwhelming.
Wanda's embrace tightened around your waist, pulling you flush against her body as she continued her relentless rhythm. She delivered sloppy pecks on your lips, gentle brushes against your cheeks, tender touches along your jawline. Despite her agitated breathing, not for a second did she halt her worshipping.
"Let go for me," she whispered against your ear, her accent slipping out.
Her order, combined with the perfect angle of her thrusts, sent you spiraling into another intense orgasm. Your walls clenched around her as waves of pleasure coursed through your body. She held you through it all, her arms secure around your waist, her lips pressing sweet kisses to your temple.
"Good job," she cooed, slowly bringing you down from your high. "You're perfect, absolutely perfect."
As your breathing steadied, she carefully withdrew, turning you in her arms to face her. Her eyes were full of adoration as she cupped your face, thumbs gently stroking your cheeks. She pressed her forehead against yours, sharing the same breath, the same space, the same devotion.
"No more fucking that girl, understood?" she asked. It was clear you were never going to let Natasha lay a hand on you again, not after this. Nevertheless, she wanted to hear you say it.
"No, never again," you assured her. "I know now, I shouldn't look outside what only you can provide for me.”
"Hmm, that's how a good girl talks," she commented, pulling away from you, intending to see your reaction when she told you the following. "Well. It's not like she's going to show up again anyway. While I was fucking you, she was probably heading on a plane back to Russia.”
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livwritessometimes · 5 months ago
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I Will Never Make You Regret This—Regret Us
: Part 18 (Lando's Version)
: All’s well that ends well to end up with you!
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: Series Masterlist
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The night grew colder as Y/n stared out at the city. It had been minutes—hours, maybe. Time had lost its meaning for her these days. The cold reminded her of the last time she was here.
...
"Be my girlfriend," Lando repeated this time, looking her right in the eye.
"Are you serious?" Y/n questioned. If you had told her a month ago that the noisy neighbor from the floor above her, whom she hated with a passion, would be standing in front of her asking her to be his girlfriend, she would have laughed in your face.
"As serious as I'll ever be," Lando said, his eyes glistening with sincerity.
"Yes," Y/n whispered, as she leaned in to close the gap between them.
...
The memory left a bittersweet taste in her mouth. It felt strange to think about him again. It had been a while since she thought of him as anything but hurt and betrayal.
The cold air nipped at her skin, but she didn't feel anything. It was as if she were trapped in the ghost of their past—so much so that she didn't hear the soft creak of the door or the footsteps that approached the secluded area where she stood, the one that offered the best view of the city.
"Y/n!" Called out the voice Y/n had been dreading as much as she had been longing to hear.
She whipped around to find none other than the boy she loved—the one who broke her heart, "Lando!" She said.
Time had stopped for the two, and for a moment, neither of them knew what to do. The weight of everything left unsaid was suffocating the both of them.
It was Lando who broke the silence first, his voice softer than she remembered. "I didn't think you'd be here," He said.
"Yeah, someone once told me it's a nice place to go to when you need a breather," Y/n shrugged as she turned back to look over the city.
Lando was at a lose for words. There were so many things he wanted to say, but he couldn't figure out where to begin.
"I hate myself," said Lando. He continued, "I hate myself for ever agreeing to that stupid dare. I hate myself for continuing with it, knowing that I had started to fall for you. I hate myself for thinking that calling off the dare would make things better. More than that, I hate myself for breaking your heart."
Y/n felt tears streaming down her face. She couldn't turn around and face him just yet, knowing that if she did, she would break down even more.
"I know that nothing I say or do can erase what has happened between us, and I don't deserve your forgiveness," Lando said, swallowing the lump that had formed in his throat. "But I hope, someday, I can make things right between us," He finished.
"I've been thinking about this a lot...and I have looked at a few houses," Lando said.
Y/n felt her heart beat even faster in anticipation of what he was about to say.
"I am going to move out," Lando said. "Us living in the same apartment complex makes things even more difficult, and I've hurt you enough already. I don't want to cause any further pain beyond what I've already done," he continued.
Y/n felt torn; the weight of his words hung heavy in the air.
Taking her silence as an answer, Lando turned to make his way downstairs.
'I don't hate you," Said Y/n.
Lando stopped in his tracks, afraid that if he moved, he'd realize that he had just imagined this.
"In fact, somehow I can never bring myself to hate you," Y/n continued.
Lando's heart felt like it was about to combust—he definitely wasn't imagining this. Slowly turning around, he saw a teary-eyed Y/n looking back at him.
"What you did was an awful, awful thing to do, and I hate that because of it, I had to question the authenticity of everything that happened between us," Y/n said, wiping away the fresh tears that were falling.
"That being said...I don't want our story to end like this. I believe that there's more to our story, and I—I'm willing to take the risk, but I swear to god, Lando Norris, if you make me regret this, I will never ever forgive you. Ever. You hear me—" Y/n was cut off by Lando suddenly throwing himself at her.
"I promise I will never make you regret this—regret us," Lando said pulling her in tighter.
(3 months later)
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Tags: @regalbanshee | @be-your-coffee-pot | @mrsbrxkkxr | @princessria127 | @moonraysandstars | @prettiest-at-the-party | @theblueblub | @magixpracticality | @slytherinholland | @overlyexcitedoutlaw | @marvel-at-stucky | @crumbssss | @a-beaverhausen | @felicityforyou | @gigigreens | @jas0nluvr | @khaylin27 | @imsiriuslyreal | @cwiphswmwasohmm | @wobblymug | @e-nonsense | @raizelchrysanderoctavius | @papaya-twinks | @vintagefucksstuff | @st4rg1rln | @redstappen | @iamred-iamyellow | @tashisgf | @ghost-of-student-sufferings | @saachiep81 | @lozzamez3 | @ravisinghs-wife | @elizamoe133 | @anthonylockwoodandco111 | @formulaal | @luvsforme | @annabellelee | @a-disturbing-self-reflection | @emryb | @grovelingmen | @illicit-affcirs | @iwilleatyourgod | @youre-on-your-ownkid | @originaldreamerdragon | @landorris | @mountvesuvu | @chezmardybum | @littlegrapejuice | @spitesfvl-blog | @juleshadalittlelamb | @vicurious28 | @phd-catstealer |
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zyafics · 1 year ago
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PLAY FAKE | 03
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MASTERLIST (Series)
Pairing — Rafe Cameron x Female Reader .ᐟ
Summary — When Rafe needs to secure a girlfriend for his father to see him as a viable candidate for Cameron Development, he enlists the help of a bartender who wants nothing to do with him.
Content — 18+, smut, angst, depictions of jealousy + aggression, emotional turmoil, mild descriptions of violence, and usage of drugs.
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The first 'date' is going to be at the country club.
You find it ironic that your first date, in general, is going to be a fake one. Truly, that sets up the rest of your love life. While you never had a steady boyfriend—simply because you don't have time or they couldn't stand that you didn't have time for them—you have fooled around before. You had flings. You had needs and they were met.
Now, funnily enough, so is your lack of dating experience.
You're closing Sailor early today. You hate that you had to but it was the only compromise you had with Rafe. He wanted to pick you up at your house, which you immediately rejected, and you wanted to meet him at the country club. Neither of you would settle, stubbornly, that Rafe decided it would be easier if he picked you up from work and let you get ready at Tannyhill.
As you're locking up the front, you hear a distinct voice calling out your name. Looking over your shoulder, you spot Pope and JJ approaching you, one offering a friendly wave while the blond tips his chin in greeting.
"Hey," Pope says, glancing at your locked doors. "You locking up early?"
"Yeah," you nod, dropping your keys into your bag. "I have to go somewhere."
"I never thought I'd live to see the day," JJ remarks, causing you to chuckle. You grew up with Pope and JJ, despite being a couple of years older, simply because they worked and live near you in The Cut. Pope, specifically, lives just a couple of houses down from yours—having helped you on several occasions with your siblings when you couldn't find a babysitter in time. "Does this mean you're finally getting a life?"
You roll your eyes at the blond. "I have a life."
"Sorry, let me rephrase that," he teases. "A life outside of bartending."
You cross your arms. "You don't seem to be complaining when I give you free booze."
JJ laughs, raising up both hands in surrender. "My bad. I didn't say shit."
Pope rolls his eyes, elbowing his best friend, before turning back to you. His expression is friendly. "Maybe this means you're free to attend some parties."
The idea sparks a reminder in JJ's eyes. "Oh, shit, that's right! We're about to head over to The Boneyard for a kegger. Wanna join?"
It's been a while since you've been to a Pogue party. The idea sounds appealing, but you had other priorities. "Sorry, boys, I got somewhere else I gotta be."
Pope shifts his gaze to the bag in your arms. "Yeah, what's that? Are you planning on running away?"
You chuckle softly. "Nope, not yet. I just have to get ready for an event and these are my new clothes."
JJ raises a brow, flicking his gaze down to the bag for a second. "Can we see?"
You flip the blond off and he laughs. Pope is about to add something else, when a car honks behind you. It must be Rafe. Without glancing behind, you declare that you need to head out and Pope nods, dragging his best friend off the docks with a farewell. When you reach the car parked near the back of the lot, the one that screams money, you get in.
Sliding into the passenger seat, you set the bag on your lap and buckle your seatbelt. Ready to go, but the car hasn't moved. When you turn your head, you see Rafe watching you with a slighted jaw.
"What?"
"What's that all about?" His voice is sharp.
"What?" You repeat, not understanding where the tone is coming from.
"Maybank and Heyward," his expression is hard and unreadable. "What were they talkin' to you about?"
"Nothing," you answer, shifting in your seat, but Rafe doesn't appear pleased. You sigh. "It was just about a party. They always invite me on the off-chance I'll go."
It takes him a beat before he responds.
"You party with them a lot?"
"No, that's why they invite me," you snap, getting a little agitated by the interrogation. "Can we go now? I still have to get ready."
Rafe looks like he wants to probe more, but thankfully, he didn't. He reverses the car out of the parking lot and takes you down the road to Tannyhill, while you admire the drive. You can't believe how split Outer Banks is—how the change in scenery goes from fishery and unkempt lawns to perfectly-manicured yards and a boat per house.
The ride is quiet. When he pulls up to the estate, the largest mansion on the island, you can't seem to stop the awe from flooding your vision. It truly is a sight. You've been here once, a couple of years ago, and the admiration still hasn't worn off. If anything, now older, it amplifies it.
When Rafe turns off the car, he exits from the vehicle in a swift motion. You half-expected him to play the boyfriend act and help you with your bags, but instead, he goes straight into the house. Asshole. You roll your eyes, unbuckling and following after him, meeting one step of his with twice of yours.
"Y'know, a boyfriend would’ve opened the door for me." You declare, following him up the stairs.
"Good to know," he sneers, "but I'm not paying to give you the boyfriend experience, am I?"
He cuts a look behind him to catch your expression and you flip him off, causing a smug look to lift at his face. When he reaches his bedroom door, he cracks it open for you to enter through.
Stepping inside, you noticed how clean it is. Then, you realized, of course it would be. Rafe probably has maids coming in every day to make it spotless for the crowned prince. You were just used to leaving your room a mess in the mornings that your Pogue expectations rolled over to him.
"You can use my bathroom." He points to the closed door on the other side of his room. You follow the voice to find him opening his closet, his back turned to you, searching for his own attire. Without a word, you nod, heading to the ensuite as you set your bags on the ground and unravel them on the sink counter.
You didn't own many fancy clothes. You never needed them and it wasn't affordable. However, you brought the most expensive thing you own. It was nothing in comparison to the luxuries in Rafe's closet, but it was enough. A white cocktail dress that cuts mid-thigh—it was what you wore for your high school graduation.
You put it on before you got ready, and when you did, it was tighter and shorter than you remember. You did gain some weight. You are also older. You try not to let the sentiment pass through you too much—that you're almost twenty-two but in the same place you were when you were eighteen.
You push the thoughts away.
You also push the reason for why you're here away too.
With a deep breath, you start on your makeup. You curl your hair. You even sprayed a little bit of the perfume that your parents got you as a birthday gift a long time ago. It's a bit faint, the smell has faded away from age, but it still smells like that morning when you opened the box, finding a present in your hands, for the first time in a long time.
You push those away too.
Stepping out, you find Rafe dressed. In a tailored dark blue suit, he sits on the edge of his mattress, his hands messing with his phone. Even you have to admit, he cleaned up nicely. His dress shirt spans perfectly across the broad of his shoulders, his biceps filling out the arms, and the form-fitting material latches onto his chest. He even styled his hair—gelled back but loose; a stark contrast to the rundown and casual look he sports upon entering your bars and parties.
The low click of your heels against the marble floor alerts him of your presence.
His gaze lifts to meet your face, before trailing down your body to take you in. You notice his Adam's apple slightly bobs and you wonder if it's because you're a little underdressed compared to him.
"Are you done?" He asks stiffly, clearing his throat and shifting his eyes away. You walk out of his bathroom completely, stopping in front of his closet mirror to apply the finishing touches of your makeup.
When you're finished, you turn back around and strike a small pose for him. "What do you think?"
"You look... good." He settles and you roll your eyes. Of course that's the only compliment he can come up with. You expect nothing less.
"You should expand your vocabulary and give better compliments to your girlfriend," you tease, stepping closer to him. His legs parts slightly, almost inviting you in. "Or else people might assume you aren't giving them enough."
He scoffs. "You look fuckable. Is that better?"
Your nose wrinkles. "Awful. 0/10."
He chuckles, looking to the floor, but his laugh is tense. You glance down, noticing the way his shoulders are rigid and his posture is straight as a rod, and realization strikes you. Just as you're nervous, so is Rafe.
You step forward, in between the space of his legs, and place a delicate hand on his shoulders. He looks up to you. "You good?" You ask gently.
"I'm fine." He quickly brushes off, pushing away from your touch. "I'm just ready to get this shit over with. I hate business dinners."
"Spoken by someone who wants to get in said business." You retort, turning around to grab your purse off his dresser, when suddenly, you feel Rafe grabs your exposed thigh, holding you in place between him.
You turn back, raising a confused brow.
"Give me a kiss."
This request startles you. "Why?"
His eyes study your face before shrugging. "Practice."
You can't help but laugh a little. It truly is your go-to response to everything, and you notice his shoulders slightly unwind at the sound. "Why? Are you a bad kisser?"
He rolls his eyes, and with one strong tug, you fall into his open lap. His hand cups your cheek, and without another word, he kisses you. Softly, at first, as if he's trying to get used to the feel of your lips against his, before deepening it. You can't help but let out a content sigh, enjoying the feeling.
When he slightly pulls away, he murmurs against your lips. "Someone needs to do something about that mouth of yours."
You scoff, placing both arms on either side of his shoulders and looping it around his neck, pulling back to get a better look of his face. His eyes are unreadable and his lips are faintly red from the shade of your lipstick.
"Isn't that supposed to be your job?" You tease, tilting your head to the side. "Or should I find another fake boyfriend to put me in my place?"
His expression goes hard. This time, he leans forward and captures your lips against him, in a firmer, more possessive manner. It's everything that accumulated so far—from seeing you with Maybank and Heyward outside the docks to the little dress-up you did specifically for him.
It's the idea of you, in his lap, knowing for the next couple of hours, you're his.
You only pull away to catch a breath, giggling at the sight of your lipstick smeared over his face. Running the pad of your thumb over his mouth, you attempt to wipe away the cosmetic product with no avail.
“You messed up my makeup,” you jokingly pout, rising from his lap. His touch loosens around you, but with great reluctance. When you go to the bathroom to take a paper towel, you return to wipe the remnant of your kisses off of Rafe.
"I'll buy you a new one." He says as you wipe away the last of it.
You roll your eyes at the suggestion. "No need." You declare, returning to his closet mirror to reapply your lipstick and fix the smudges.
He says nothing in return. His gaze follows your every move. It isn't until you're done, really done, that you step in front of him and hold out your hand for Rafe to take.
"Come on, boyfriend," you say the title with a tease. "Time to play house."
When you arrive at the country club, your heart stutters in your chest. It's a bit intimidating, the glory of Fight Eight and all their Kooks, pinned down to this exclusive membership to say you made it. You wonder, for a brief moment, if you'll ever get there.
But, then you remember, for the next couple of hours, you'll pretend you did.
You don't know if Rafe allowed you a few minutes in the car to get ready or if he needed it himself, but you take the scraps. When the moment was over, he stepped out and crossed over to the passenger side to open your door.
You smile at the gesture, allowing yourself to be led out of the car by his hand. When he closes the door behind you, you tilt your head up at him. "Thought boyfriend acts were below you?"
"Had to play the part in front of these people, didn’t I?"
You remember where you are and the smile fades out. You are no longer in the confines of your bar nor his desolated mansion. It's you, with people watching, with people reporting, with his father within proximity. Every decision, in the next couple of hours, is an act.
A falsity.
Remember that.
You silently nod as he places his arm around your waist, planting a soft kiss on the side of your forehead, as he leads you towards the entrance. There were waitstaff attending there, and when you approach close enough, they open the double doors. Rafe skips past them without a single acknowledgement, but you mumble a thank you in their direction, before being whisked away to the setting.
Your eyes admire the details. The decorations hung against the walls and railings of the place, the bouquets set on every corner, the streams of crystal chandeliers dangling above you in every room. It's glorious.
"They have tulips," you whisper to Rafe, who follows your gaze to the centerpiece in front of the stairwell. "It's not even in season."
"We're Kooks, sweetheart," he says with a scoff, an air of arrogance. "If we want something, we get it."
You say nothing as you scan the rest of the room, preparing yourself for the evening. Rafe and you went through most of the details about your arrangement, how you two got together, when it happened, and the minor sentiments to make it seem real. You believe you're prepared enough.
"Ready to meet my dad, sweetheart?" Rafe mumbles into your ear, his breath hot against your neck. You nod.
"As ready as I'll ever be, darling."
Rafe chuckles at the nickname you picked, but you figured it would play the part. Pretend there's some tenderness between the two of you. You may not have been given instructions on how to be a girlfriend, but you imagine it would be something cheesy. Sweet. A little bit unrealistic.
Just like this.
Rafe pulls you towards the crowd. While caterers and waiters waltz across the room in a coordinated dance, you couldn't help but search for the bartenders. Of who they booked this evening. You wonder, for a moment, if you were even on their radar.
A murmur of conversations starts to fade out as you arrive and your fingers squeeze Rafe's hand. Ward was the last to acknowledge your presence, his eyes observing you and trailing down to the intertwined hands of you and his eldest son.
"Dad," Rafe greets, his voice filled with proper and posh, you wonder if this was the same person you were talking to moments ago. "I'd like you to meet my girlfriend."
He introduces your name to the crowd and Ward stares in amazement, if not, with a little bit of disbelief. His eyes left his son, tracing you, trying to pinpoint anything out of place.
"Hi," you hold out your hand for a handshake. He takes it. "It's so nice to meet you. Rafe has told me all about you."
"He has?" Ward lifts his dark brow at you. "What does he say?"
Other than rants about you? Nothing good, you thought.
Rafe stiffens beside you, his eyes on the firmed on the side of your face but you don't falter. You've been in customer service for a long time, you knew how to lie.
"He said you're a good businessman for Cameron Development. Someone with a lot of difficult choices to make. He hopes to be there with you one day." You summarize, pinpointing the good details of Rafe's tirades. You hope he didn't recognize the little jab you placed there.
Ward looks amused. A bit proud. But says nothing more. Dinner is declared ready and everyone begins to take their place. You fall into a seat beside Rafe; he even pulled out a chair for you before he sat.
You want to stick your tongue at him and tease him, but you know this isn't the appropriate time. Returning your sight to what's before you, you feel slightly out of place. Usually, you're the one serving these people, not the ones being served. The reversed role is jarring.
When the waitress comes around and asks for everyone's drink orders, you internally frown. When she came to you, you answered that you wanted some pinot noir while Rafe chose whiskey neat. Leaving off, the business dinner proceeds.
You zone in-and-out at their conversations. It's mostly about marketplace and land developments, furthering relationships between companies, and the occasional jab on who has the better enterprise. You wanted to nod off, but you didn't.
So, you watch Rafe instead.
His eyes are set on his father, observing the interactions between him and his business partners. His gaze is focused and diligent, absorbing every little detail, as if he's making mental notes about it. About how he would proceed if he gets the company.
You admire that. It reminds you of how you view Sailor.
When the conversation winds down to casual talk, and you're on your second course, Ward surprises you by calling you out by name.
You lift your gaze to meet his. "I wanted to ask where I know you from," Ward begins, raising his glass. "You seem vaguely familiar."
You clear your throat before you answer.
"I work at Sailor," you explain, wiping your hands against the clothed napkin. "My family owns it. We catered for you a few years ago."
It takes a moment for it to click, and recognition dawns on his face. "That's right," he drawls, amused chuckles signals to the rest of the table. "You were working as the bartender for one of the company's charity events. You had that specific drink I like," he clicks his fingers, trying to remember the name. "That whiskey."
"The Godfather?" You offer, to which Ward nods in confirmation. You laugh softly. "Yeah, that's a family recipe. It's been in my family for a couple generations."
"I remember you saying that before," he nods. "So, that makes you a Pogue."
You know it wasn't said with disdain. Not the same manner that his son carries for the second class. Ward used to be a Pogue himself, being one of the very few who was able to rise out of lower-class and make a name for himself. Despite knowing he's on the opposite side of you, you did admire that. You wanted that yourself.
"So were you, sir. You're a legend around The Cut," you compliment. "The ideal story of how we can make it out."
"With your work ethic, I don't doubt it," he compliments with a wink and you smile. The compliment feels real, and you felt appreciated. Saying nothing else, you take a sip of your drink as you watch how Ward's gaze slides over to his son sitting quietly next to you.
The dinner proceeds with more chatter. You swear you were getting full by the end of the meal, before dessert, that you ask Rafe to take some of your food and finish them for himself. He begrudgingly accepts, allowing you to inconspicuously slide the plate over to his. When it came down to the final hour and everything was served, people started heading out for the night.
Everyone leaving, the table slowly empties until it was only Ward, Rose, Rafe and you.
"So, you're dating my son," Ward declares, and you hesitantly nod. You don't know which direction this conversation may lead, especially now that there's no social barriers constraining his interrogation. "How long?"
You lift your gaze to Rafe, hoping he could answer and you could supply.
"A few weeks," he answers curtly, his eyes set on his father. You notice his hands clenched on his lap, his leg bouncing under the table. "It's new."
"After our...?"
"Yes," Rafe answers without allowing him to finish. "I thought I would listen to your advice."
Ward nods, satisfied. You thought it would be the end of it, before he turned back to you. "Do you know about Rafe's habits?"
Rafe stiffens. His eyes pinned on his father with a hard expression, almost a silent plea not to continue, but Ward ignores his son. "His parties and his drinking? The occasional drugs?"
Rafe turns to you, watching you as you come up with an answer. You silently move your hand over his, enclosing it over his larger one, hoping it would ease some relief into his system. Almost a silent promise; a way to say I have your back.
"I do," you nod, letting the words roll off lightly.
"And you still choose to date him?"
You nod again. "Yes, sir."
Ward laughs. "A saint."
Rafe tense under your touch.
"It's not that." You shake your head, your expression serious. "He has his vices, sure, but that doesn't undermine who he is. He's determined and focused, and when he has a goal, he puts his whole being into it. It's good to have someone like him in your corner."
You avoid Rafe's eyes as you say this. It surprised him. He didn't think you would say some positive attributes about him, especially since he's been nothing but a pretentious asshole to you, but your words were genuine. Authentic. He heard you lie and tell truths, and this one leans towards the latter.
Ward looks to be in the same vein of astonishment and you say nothing as you smile, lifting your glass by the stem and taking another sip. The alcohol isn't as good as yours, but you were glad to make it out alive and passed the test.
When the caterers came back to clean up the table, you decided that you wanted to help them. You know it was unconventional, to be assisting the help as the guest, but you wanted to get out of the space for a moment. To get back to your roots.
You carry some dishes and head towards the kitchen, despite the gentle pleas from the waitstaff.
When you left, Rafe remained with his father. Rose is gathering her things as Ward rises from his chair, Rafe following in suit. When the patriarch gestures for him to approach, the diligent son listens, stepping towards his father.
Ward claps his hand on his shoulder, almost proud. "I'm surprised, Rafe, I never thought I'd see the day." He begins, glancing over to you in the kitchen, moving around in swift and coordinated style. "You did good, son, probably the best you'll ever do."
Rafe stiffens under his father's touch. The words pricking in his ears. "She's a capable woman. But, next time you bring her, make sure she wears something more... appropriate."
He glances back over to you, replacing the plates to the top cabinets, rising to your tippy-toes in a way that pulls up the back of your short dress. Yes, he noticed that it wasn't the typical business attire, a little shorter than recommended, but he pinned it as something a Pogue would wear. Something they didn't think about.
But, the criticism in his ear from his father, it leaves a bitter taste in his mouth. Rafe clenches his jaw, just as Ward slips his hand off his son's shoulder and gathers his wife to leave.
Rafe stands still. He watches you for a few more moments. He noticed some of the sparsely-remaining guests would pass the kitchen, on the way to the exit, and spare a glance at you and your barely-covered ass. His anger heightens.
Marching over, Rafe says nothing as he surprises you and grabs your arm. Without saying a word, he pulls you away from the kitchen and takes you to the nearest bathroom.
He locks the door close.
"What–what the hell?" You snap, pulling your arm out of his grip but his hold is firm. Your furrowed gaze looks up to meet him, finding his expression nothing short of a timid rage and fury, ready to boil over and burst.
Rafe is strumming with adrenaline. With anger. With all these emotions coursing through him in rapid succession, he can't reach out and grab any of them. Something about his father's comment tonight rubbed him in a bad way. The way Ward doesn't think he was good enough for you, a Pogue he found off the streets. The way your dress is too fucking short. The way you were being too kind—grabbing his hand, calming him, complimenting him. It was all wrong.
He needs release.
He needs to take it out on you.
"You had to wear the shortest fucking thing you owned?" He sneers, his hand sliding over your ass and squeezing it, hard. It elicits a small moan from you. "Had to show off what a fucking slut you are, didn't you?"
Your mind is spinning. You don't understand what is going on. You thought everything was good—you even sweared you saw a covert smile on Rafe's face before you left. You don't know what could happen between then and now and why he's being so aggressive to you. His words. His touch.
You don't know why you like it.
Turning around, you try to grab his attention, placing a hand on the side of his face. "What happened?" You say, breathless, "talk to me."
He flinches out your touch. "I don't want to talk."
"What do you want?"
"Get on your knees."
You do.
Rafe watches as you sink to the bathroom floor, the lack of coverage from your dress does nothing to soften the hardness of the ground. He unbuckles his pants, removes them, and reveals the impressive bulge hidden behind his boxer-briefs.
You watch attentively as he takes the last piece of barrier off, freeing his cock, just inches from your face. The tip is covered with a bit of precum, something that you want to put in your mouth. You feel the throb in your pussy, squeezing your legs tighter to relieve some of the ache.
"You want a boyfriend who puts you in your place?" He looks down at you, the look on his eyes is hard and detached, like he's out of it. "One who's there to do something with that mouth of yours? You want that, Pogue?"
You find yourself nodding, almost hungrily, following along to his words. He scoffs with a condescending laugh, gripping the base of his shaft with one hand and guiding it closer to your mouth. "Open."
Part of you want to use the moment to ask him what's going on. For him to clue you in on something. But you don't get the chance. Without your immediate obedience, Rafe roughly grabs your face and squeezes your cheeks, forcing your mouth to pop open.
"Are you going to listen to me, sweetheart?" He taunts, "or am I gonna have to teach you a lesson?"
"I'll listen." You confess, your voice doesn't sound like your own. The ache between your legs doesn't subside.
Satisfied, Rafe levels the tip to your face, tapping it against the plump of your bottom lip, before pushing it in.
He goes a little fast. Like he's trying to fuck your face. Your touch comes up to slow down, exchanging his hand with yours, grabbing his base to allow you to guide his cock into your mouth at your own discretion. He allows you to have that control, his hand traveling up to your hair, tugging at the roots.
When he hits the back of your throat, you gag, and Rafe lets out a guttural groan. "Fuck, just like that," he murmurs, tipping his head back at you take him in. "This fucking mouth."
He comes in and out of you, finding a rhythm that allows you to get used to his dick in your mouth. When you do something that makes him feel good, his grip around your hair tightens, pulling you to stay in place.
"Is this how I have to punish you?" His voice is sharp, but the edge comes off with every pleasure that elicits out of him. "You get one fucking chance to meet all these people, all these Kooks, and you had to dress like a slut. To show off?"
He grabs you by the roots, tilting your head in a way that pops his cock out and your eyes to find his. "Who do you belong to?" He asks.
Your core throbs at the possession. "You."
He nods and breathes out a raspy breath. "That's fucking right."
Letting you go, Rafe suddenly pulls you to your feet. His hands hooks under your ass and lifts, setting you down on the sink counter, your back slams against the wall in a harsh beat. Without wasting a second, Rafe grabs your thighs and pulls you towards the edge, just enough where you don't fall off.
"Rafe," you call out, as your eyes connect with his, his breathing is heavy. His eyes are wild. He doesn't answer you, roughly spreading apart your thighs, his hand traces the wet patch formed against your panties, causing a shiver to run down your spine. "God."
Rafe leans in, his lips just caressing your bare shoulders. "Just a Pogue who does what I want, when I want, aren't you?" He reminds you of your place, the gentle touches of his fingers erupting aches and unbearable heat between your legs. You don't answer him in time. "Aren't you?"
"Just yours."
He chuckles, pulling back to flick his gaze up to you. "And who made you this wet?"
Your voice is needy. "You did."
"That's right," he pushes your panties to the side, fingers moving up and down your slit in delicate strokes. You lean forward into his touch but his grip is placed on your hips. "I did. And I want you to remember that this is mine. No one can touch but me."
You nod into his words, willing to give him anything to prove some semblance of pleasure for you. "All yours," you choke desperately, "please, make me come."
His hand leaves your core, and the coldness that evades his absence pricks your sensitive skin. His hand raises to cup the back of your neck, forcing you to meet his eyes. "Aw, baby," he mocks, "bad girls don't get to come."
You open your mouth to object, but Rafe lines his cock against your entrance and, without warning, pushes himself in. You feel your body arches forward, letting out an uninhibited moan, as he stretches you out.
"Fuck," you press your forehead against his warm chest, your breathing unsteady and your eyes flutters in-and-out of consciousness. "It's so—you're so—" You can't find your words, your mind scrambled.
Rafe catches your jaw, forcing your eyes open and to look down at you see him lodge deeper and deeper inside of you. His motion is slow and steady, allowing you to adjust, before quickening his speed. "Look," he murmurs into your ear, your skin hot everywhere, "look at how good your pussy is taking me."
The sound of wetness echoes in the small bathroom, the evidence of your arousal to him, to Rafe, that you can't help but choke at the noise. Your head is spinning. You feel pleasure and pain ripping out of you, all at once, subdued by the rising credence of your climax.
Rafe doesn't loosen his grip around your jaw, forcing you to watch attentively to how his cock thrusts upon you, entering and leaving, the motion a mesmerizing sight that produces further need within you.
"Rafe," you moan with a whimper, you steady yourself by gripping his shoulders, digging your nails into your shoulder blades, trying to regain some control. "Faster. Please, I want to come so bad."
"What did I say, sweetheart?" He tilts your head to meet his hardened gaze, his breathing shakily and unorganized as the feeling of the way your walls grip him provides the most pleasurable sensation, he was sure to come soon. "Bad girls don't come."
Your eyes grow teary as you feel him fill you up, to the hilt, your stomach so full of him. He moves at a pace that works for him, that allows him to climb to his climax, while it's frustratingly slow for you. Not enough for you to reach the peak.
You lean into him, chest pressed to chest, your breathing unsteady as your walls tightens around cock.
"Come on, baby." He taunts. "Make me feel so good."
Him, you note, because this is about his pleasure. Because you didn't deserve to reach the same ecstasy.
"Rafe," your voice is so raspy, you resort to begging. You can feel his cock twitching inside of you. "Please, please, I'll be so so good—"
He slaps a hand over your mouth, covering your pleas. Your eyes teary as you stare up at him. "I don't want to hear anything." He snaps with a grunt, "you're a Pogue. Fucking act like it."
This Rafe is cruel. It isn't the same person who defended you against the drunk stranger. He isn't the same one who kissed you at Tannyhill. This is the Rafe you met on the back porch of Topper's house, the one who comes into your bar, the wildcard his father warns you about.
You know you should stop this. To come to your senses and deny him of the pleasure he so desperately chasing from you. To gain some control. But it feels so goddamn good, that the idea of losing the feeling of Rafe, inside of you, was harder to bear. It makes you lose all clarity.
When you feel Rafe's strokes growing more sloppy, a sudden realization dawns on you.
"Rafe," you say breathily, "pull out. I need—you need to pull out."
He cups your cheeks, a firm but not harsh grip like before, and forces your eyes to meet his. "What did I say about telling a Kook what to do?" He taunts lazily, just with one final thrust, he comes inside of you.
His hot cum fills you up, and it feels so warm and nice, you think you're going insane with the buzzing sensation you feel afterwards. He stiffens as he spazzes, his head leaning against the crook of your neck as the wave of his climax rolls over him, the stillness of his cock inside of you leaves an unbearable ache between your legs.
Rafe pulls out within a few short breaths, slipping his dick out of you as the cum leaks onto the counter and drips onto the floor. You are completely still, your eyes following him as he reshuffles around in his post-orgasmic haze, redressing his pants and briefs in one piece.
He moves around to grab some tissue papers, coming back to dab the area around your filled cunt to clean you up, his eyes not meeting yours. In shame, frustration, or clarity, you don't know.
When he finishes, he buckles his belt and throws the tissues into the trash. Pausing at the door, he glances at you for a brief, tiniest second. "Clean up. I'll drive you back."
When he leaves, you take a moment to gather yourself. To reel in everything. You slowly slip off the counter, landing on wobbly and aching legs, and turn around to view your reflection in the mirror.
The mess of your hair, the wrinkles of your clothes, his cum leaking down your thighs.
It takes a beat, then two, before you find yourself producing words.
"What the fuck just happened?" 
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Navigation — Part 02 | Part 03 | Part 04
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johannesviii · 7 months ago
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Nearly every time I've rewatched Infinity Train Book 3 since I first saw it in February, I saw more parallels and narrative echos, and infodumping my friends about them isn't enough anymore
I figured I should do a post about this one because I don't think I've seen a post about that specific thing yet, and I love this show's writing, and. idk. I just need to praise it I guess
So, the most obvious part first:
Grace became everything she hated about her parents
When Grace mentions her mother in the Debutante Ball Car, it's made pretty clear she's trying to distance herself from her mother as much as possible, and at this point, we realise retrospectively that Grace's room in the Mall Car in episode one was full of sports clothes - it seems she tries to avoid things reminding her of her life before the train. And of her mother. And yet-
She tries to control everyone and everything around her, and makes people do what she doesn't want to do
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And she decides what's cool and what isn't
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She makes people kneel in her presence, like her mother towers over her in her mind's eye
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Obviously she constantly lies to get what she wants, and her dad does that in her tape
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When her younger self looks up, she looks right through adult Grace, and it's actually her parents she's looking at! Her younger self is metaphorically seeing her parents where her adult self is standing!! I still can't get over this shot
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Also I feel the need to mention her mother has the same voice actor as her in her tape and even if it might be to cut corners in the budget, that feels significant (and to be fair, sometimes you can cut corners while making meaningful choices at the same time)
Now you might think I'd have nothing to say about Simon on that matter, since we don't see any flashback of his life before the Train, and we know next to nothing about his parents. But I think it's very telling that the only actual backstory we get for him is his backstory with The Cat.
Because-
Simon became everything he hated about The Cat
Ok I never see anyone mentioning this, but hear me out
First, we have no idea if Simon knew The Cat was routinely invading people's privacy through their memory tapes, but he sure has no issue doing the exact same thing
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But that doesn't stop there. He also collects things obsessively
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And makes kids collect things for him as well, by the way
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He thinks he's above others, but he immediately switches to victim mode when it comes back to bite him
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HE. ABANDONS. A CHILD. WHO WAS UNDER HIS CARE!!
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And. Uh. They both dig their heels instead of trying to change, too
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Don't get me wrong, on some level I would have liked to know what Simon's parents were like too. I would have liked that a lot. But there's a good chance it wouldn't change anything, because everything we need to know about his background to understand why he's Like That™ is already in the show
But yeah, Grace and Simon both pretend they found freedom on the Train, and both distance themselves from parental figures who are at the source of their trauma, claiming they're different and better than them - and yet they are both subconsciously repeating patterns that caused at least part of their problems and/or trauma in the first place
And since they decided that making numbers go up was good, as long as they stick to that idea, they are bound to never escape from that self-perpetuating loop of harm and trauma
And I love it
And I hate it
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amsznn · 1 year ago
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Hey can you do one where the reader has a crush on Matt.She is very much giving heart eyes and tries to do anything to make him happy.Matt being oblivious complains to his brother about it.Nick and Chris smack some sense into him saying how lucky he is to have someone like us care about him.Matt disagrees and the reader hears this causing her to stop not wanting to make him uncomfortable.Matt misses the way things use to be and gets jealous when learning the reader is going out on a date.At the end they have an argument and he tells her how he really feels.Lots of angst in the beginning fluff towards the end please!!
OVERBEARING - m. sturniolo
warnings: slight cursing, angst at start, fluff at the end
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-
you couldn’t deny it anymore. and you dont think it went unnoticed either.
the lingering gazes, to the more than normal laughter at his jokes, or the constant acts of service. how you were willing to do anything for him. just him.
matthew sturniolo.
you thought your constant need to be near him was just you wanting to be better friends. that was until your feelings started growing stronger.
“y/n, helloo.”
you brought your attention to the voice you found yourself loving so much.
“sorry, what?”
“i asked if you could pass the remote.” matt repeated while settling down beside you on the couch. you nodded and reached over to grab the remote to hand it to him. it was around 1 AM, and it was just the two of you. nick and chris had went to their rooms while you and matt decided to watch a movie.
“want me to get you a blanket?” you whispered as matt stared at the screen to the opening of the movie.
“no, im good.” matt says. you nodded and turned your head towards the movie. about five minutes or so passed when you asked another question.
“hungry?”
“nope.” matt responds, adding a ‘pop’ to the p to exaggerate his response. you mumbled an ‘okay’. a few beats of silence passed before once again, you asked.
“are you sure-”
“y/n, please m’ just trying to watch the movie in peace.” matt sighed. he was getting frustrated by the second. after a long day of filming with his relatively loud brothers, the only sounds he wanted to hear were the actors on the tv.
but this was only one example of your persistence. you were always clung to matt’s side. following him like a lost puppy at all times.
always there to cook him up a meal after his long day, willing to do any of his chores that he just didn’t feel like doing, even soothing him to sleep on those tough nights where everything went blank.
nick would sometimes make fun of matt. it almost seemed like you were his mother with the way you acted. but thats not what you were trying to come off as. you simply just had a lot of love for the boy that you weren’t really ready to confess yet.
but for matt? he didn’t see your clinginess as a good thing, in fact he began to hate it once nick pointed it out.
on one particular day matt decided to bring it up to his brothers while they were in nick’s room.
“i just don’t get it, like she’s just always there.” matt says while pacing around the room.
“is that a bad thing?” nick asks while organizing the clothes in his closet.
“i mean it wouldn’t be if she didn’t act like im some sort of child.” matt sighed while plopping down at the edge of the bed.
“i dunno, i’d love to have someone like y/n. she literally does everything for you bro.” chris laughs while slightly nudging matt.
“yeah..” nick yells from his closet. “don’t know why you’re bitchin’ bout it she’s literally helps you with like…” nick took a pause to think. “everything!”
matt scoffs before shaking his head. “yeah well it’s nice before it gets fucking unbearable.”
unbeknownst to matt, you could hear this whole conversation. you had came to drop off some food for the triplets, and since you had an extra key you went straight in. now you would’ve made yourself known until you realized you were the topic of their conversation.
to say you were hurt from matts words was an understatement. you quickly rushed out of the house, tears streaming down your face recounting every scenario where you were overbearing.
-
hours turned into days and days turned into weeks. matt hadn’t heard from you in a while. he expected to wake up to your daily morning texts, but nothing. after he shrugged that off he expected you to come over like you usually did. but once again, you didn’t.
he found himself longing for your presence more than he ever did.
you both went no contact until you came over, seeking nicks assistance since you had a date that night in hopes that your little crush on matt would subside.
you had went the whole time without speaking to the brunette. opting for a simple ‘hey’. matt was confused. why were you suddenly so distant? sure he wanted space at times but this is not what he had in mind.
matt finally snapped when you attempted rushing out their house, bidding matt goodbye with a meek ‘see ya’.
matt rose from his spot on the catch before making his way towards you. “are you gonna tell me what’s going on, or are you gonna keep avoiding me?” matt said while crossing his arms on his chest.
you could only roll your eyes before slipping your shoes on. “i dont know what you’re talking about, but i have to go.” you spat harshly before spinning on your heel.
“woah, what’s up with you?” matt yelled, shocked at your sudden anger towards him. he pulled you back by your wrist so you could face him.
“y’know if you found me ‘overbearing’ you could’ve just told me.”
thats when everything came back to matt. instant regret washed over him as he gazed upon your solemn expression. the same eyes that used to hold so much adoration for him now hollow.
“i’m so sorry y/n. i know theres no excuse to what i said but i was just being stupid.” matt sighed while running a hand down his face. “you’re far from overbearing, in fact i...i really miss you.”
“really?” you mumbled while your facial expression softened. matt nodded before embracing you in a tight hug to which you reciprocated by wrapping your arms around his waist. your date long forgotten.
“you’re amazing the way you are, and im sorry if i made it seem any other way.”
you smiled at matts words before leaning up to look at him. “just tell me next time, okay?” matt smiled and lightly pecked the side of your temple. happy to have finally gotten you back.
the version of you he loved.
and the version of you he would always cherish.
-
A/N: sorry this should’ve came out yesterday but i had to study for an exam. i have also been experiencing writers block but i have a new matt series in mind so stay on the look out for that!
tags:
@junnniiieee07 @tillies33ssss @whore4matt @stellarsturns @summerl986 @inveigledvex @beccaluvschris @stingerayyy2 @bunnysturns @braindead4l @vickyzloserz @sturnzsblog
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bunji-enthusiast · 6 months ago
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𝐃𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐋𝐨𝐫𝐝.
☀︎︎ || With a long awaited reunion, Jayce finally gathers the courage to do something he should’ve done a long time ago.
C/W || nothing nsfw honestly, just lots of fluff, Reader’s gender isn’t implied here, appearance isn’t descriptive, Jayce is just awkward with feelings.
Word Count || 3,433
Note || I feel I should clarify that my whole driving force behind this was inspired by all the jayvik scenes (however you view them lmao), and the song ‘young and beautiful’. Some other things inspired this but mainly these things.
This is also a first I’m posting a fic about a character from Arcane, or arcane at all honestly so some honest criticism for my writing would be appreciated.
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That scream repeated over and over in his mind, again and of course – again. Jayce was becoming tired, worn down. His heart began dulling out the environment around him, causing him to look forward, no baggage weighing in on the astral shoulders of his that bore a weight so greatly, for the reality of the supposed great arcane. He was trapped in it for so long. 
Red, all he saw was red painting the calluses of his hands. His hands grabbing desperately onto yours, feeling the warmth, the sensation of that beloved warmth leaving your body. 
(All he could do was choke out a cry. Silent in the loudness of the world crashing down around the being of you both.)
Another fabric of time, which would have also been his reality. In which you were enemies, Jayce, he wasn’t sure what side to be on. All he knew was to destroy what was necessary, you otherwise wanted to destroy him. Jayce tried to converse with you, yet his growls fell on deaf ears. He was trying to end things, he really was. His want clashed with yours, the need to end things. Jayce just wanted you to not be in pain anymore, and that look in your eyes, the tense stance, pained breathing punishing sharply in the cavity of your chest – that confirmed it for him. 
But what was he becoming this time? (Man, or beast?) 
He couldn’t tell. 
A remaining constant rang true for him each and every time he was chained down in each memory, stone marble cracking in the face of your memory, he was almost beginning to forget what your face looked like. But that scream, it never left him. Your scream was the constant variable of which he experienced each and every time, and you almost always looked at him in fear.
Jayce hated that, he really hated that so much. Looked upon in unease, the sweat on your palms accumulating, and the trepidation rapidly beating in the confines of your ribcage; that heart of yours about ready to jump out, easily because of him. 
On that cobblestone floor, cracked by death and echoes of explosion. 
He couldn’t tell if you loved him–maybe as a friend–yet either way it was, once. He probably missed it, only looking past you right at others, Viktor, Mel, or even the face of the Hextech Gemstone. The way you were always so kind to greet him even if he didn’t remain a figure of importance in certain situations, you had always made an effort to include not only him, everyone else as well. You brought people together in a way he seldom noticed. But now that he was trapped in the belly of the beast, he thought about it more often. 
Jayce truly realized that you had. (But did he ever deserve it? He was beastly toward you often.) 
One step after the other, and he realized harshly–being brought back to the now. Something, or someone was far ahead of him. In this void of darkness, and even the occasion of the beautifully loud rainbow swarms, he had never come across someone real. So he began to rush forward, keeping a vice grip on his hammer. 
He choked out a shout, feeling his esophagus sore and weak. His body creaked, bones clicking against each other softly, and every which way he twisted himself — he could hear it. Jayce could clearly feel the way his joints had sanded, slowly creaking under the weight of herculean effort to press forward. 
The dull ache pressed in his chest, but he couldn't help the youth that springed him forward for a momentary transition in time.
A voice echoes, so strikingly similar to someone he holds dear. And he wonders if that was really the real deal, but he was easily proven wrong once the being speaks; “You must not fail, Jayce.”
Not Fail.
Must, not fail. The accursed organism had repeatedly told him that same mantra over and over again. He was pushed through the time lapse, and forced to relive the gruesome experience of being a human. The poor decisions made, the hope (and the false).
It was easily his driving force as he made it through the dark glowering of magicks that cursed his downfall, and the others around him. Jayce tried not to open his eyes as the sharp pains followed his limbs, intakes of breathing that punished him with every step he took. Yet it was sudden as he felt a ghostly touch impressed into his upper back, causing him to twitch, swerving his head nearly off the hinges as he looked to see whom the cause of the touch was. The crinkles beneath his eyes expressed clear frustration, as he was tricked once again. Jayce cursed himself mentally as he trudged forward, the onslaught of surprises resuming once again when the light gleamed – jarring as can be for a low fluorescent tone. He recapitulated his position, standing firmly into whatever ground there was irrespective of the pain. Jayce’s hands were worn with exhaustion, each and every ache screaming at him to fall down, rest. 
Imaginably he could, but he dared not too. (He couldn’t rest, not again.)
This was his last resort, he was not capable of letting it happen again. He needed to make sure nobody died, he needed to make sure it wasn’t out of bleeding, feeling cold. He knew it far too well, and he was going to make sure he was doing everything in his power to–
Oh wow. 
It was painful–painless–for a few moments, leaving him disoriented as he grunted, trying to accumulate to his new surroundings. He wondered where he was now, what would it show him next?
He blinks for a few moments, struggling to stand up as he supports his weight on the hammer. Inevitably cracking his neck, easing himself of the sore pains that riddled his neck and even the rest of his body. His leg was where it had really hurt for the matter, but no reason to worry, he was ready for whatever was gonna come next. 
“Jayce?” A gasp escapes his throat, ebbing it raw, his eyes blurring into clearness for the first time. He furrows his brow, attempting to get a clearer look at the source. The man was worn from battle–he tenses, fully rising to his height. 
(He heard a voice, and it was yours. Not an illusion, not a past memory. It was really that same cadence that not even the arcane could replicate.)
His throat bobs, churning with a burn that reminds him that he really is here. Where he had first disappeared in the first place, the accursed base of the HexGate facility. Jayce really, really had begun to hate HexTech. His eyes briefly scorn the intricate designs, almost weaved like the stories in tapestries. The stories were wrong, they always had been wrong. He should’ve listened to Heimerdinger, he should've listened to the professor. 
What was he doing?
Oh god.
“Is that you?” His eyes flicker back over to the one other person in the room, right in front of him. Jayce attempted—couldn’t—to look you in the eye, it was a difficult thing to do. His brows furrowed, a headache came to the forefront of his pain, and he closed his eyes. He heaved a heavy sigh–he was ashamed. 
Killing came so easy to him now, so why is this now any different?
Deciding to test the waters he quietly muttered your name, followed by a gentle greeting; “Hey.” Jayce murmurs, his bottom lip quivered for a moment.
You could see how cracked his lips were, and it made you almost worry for him. Of course, you should be. But you didn’t want to rush him, the way he had carried himself, you could see he was still far too tense and on edge. Both of you were thinking the same, worried about the other, still wanting to embrace each other–even so used to the touches of danger. It was in consideration, that made it all too painfully slow in this reunion. You nodded your head, taking a step forward. 
“You’ve been gone quite awhile,” You verbalized with a tilt of your head, gesturing about the length of his absence. “I was… worried.” He gave pause to your comment, a slight widening of his eyes as he lifted his gaze, albeit shortly enough to reach your torso. You looked different from what he remembered, just right there was enough to make him realize the passage of time. 
“How–I, how long have I been gone?” He internally winced at the way his voice sounded, his throat felt so sore. Jayce wasn’t sure himself, he felt it best to ask you. He understood that time had passed extensively, not how much for the matter, he felt it passing entirely differently during his time within the core of the arcane–whatever its physical being is. Something entirely reminiscent of a curse. He despised it so much for leaving you and the others without warning. But yet again, he hadn’t taken a step back to think about his words and actions, and how easily he could hurt others. Jayce knew better than that now, atleast. 
He could almost feel the hesitation radiating off of you, as if answering would be the end of all things. Jayce heaved a mournful breath, letting his eyes close. 
(Maybe it would, he wasn’t sure. Jayce didn’t want you to be afraid of him, is all.)
The room was cold, cold as the winter storm of the day he crossed paths with the arcane, he had almost forgotten that. Yet it was useless when he felt the warmth of something inexplicable touching his cheek, leathery he must feel. Jayce felt the way his skin hardened, the way his body tenses when he’s touched. But–that wasn’t the case here, no. 
A small gentle pad of the thumb swiped over the area, leaving him to open his eyes – inextricably locking gazes. Jayce was left surprised, almost recoiling for a split-moment. You kept a firm hold, your gaze all but gentle. Which was the last thing he expected, he searched any inch of your expression, and not once did your eyes falter in that interval of time. Jayce was tempted to stray away from your touch, every nerve in his being telling him to do so. However, it was something else that let him stay in the same position. That same stance, and he was unable to run away from it. 
Jayce grimaced, holding his head. Another episode, what he’s seen. Far too much of it, you concluded. 
He could see flashes of something unholy, far too close to the sun, or perhaps far too close to the moon. Jayce could see the debilitating deflections of creatures, something supernatural, the coarseness of rainbows. It was the way his lungs squeezed upon itself, twisting in a macabre manner of gestations that left him breathless for a meager few moments. You simply held him through it, and gently murmured, drawing his attention to you once more. Whatever he saw, it was the countless hours of death, it was inescapable. Blurry had it appeared to be once over, as he never wanted to recall the things he experienced. The last thing that had never been blocked out were those memories of you, dying over and over again, especially by his hands. It was in repetition that he blacked out so many times over, constantly finding himself in new arenas. Having to raise his hammer against someone else, seeing their blood splatter against the coldstone of the ground. Jayce wasn’t sure how he hadn’t–broken. 
It always felt far too real to him, he was sure it had. The heavy heart that corones his emotions, the way he acts. Probably in that alone that he had caused the deaths of so many innocents so many times, even for a different fabric in the space-fold of time, it still happened. Jayce didn’t want that to happen to you–not again–to anyone else. 
With the impossible decisions, and the road he had walked so far. There was nothing short of a future, or a dream for him anymore. He had to fight, even if that meant physically. Jayce knew there was something different in this life of his, he just wished this wasn’t the truth of it. He grieved it even, but he couldn’t truly be given time to process that. Life does not slow down for anyone, not even you, and not even him. One is only human after all, and you sure as hell make the most of it, the best you can, even if people may hate you for the smallest thing. It is innately the most human thing that truly makes each and every person kind, despite their supposed repugnant nature that makes mankind so infamous. 
“Jayce,” You murmured, a tone so soft, he didn’t deserve it. “Can you please look at me?” Almost to your whims, he felt so commanded. A rarity in such matters, that he didn’t mind it. Such a simple action, and it seemed so difficult though. But he tried, and succeeded. 
For the second time now, he locked eyes with you. His gaze was colored by bashfulness, leaving you to laugh. A tender touch, revering the inches of encroaching warmth that crawled back into his skin bit by bit. You breathed a puff of air, noting the cold atmosphere. 
‘He must’ve been cold before he came back out.’ You scrutinized the details for a moment, and considered how much time he spent. How long he went without proper warmth, the lack of temperature. Whatever or whomever it may have been that was his captor, you were glad he was finally freed for good, hopefully. You just were relieved that you could finally just see him, and know that he’s truly there (instead of just a delusion). Even if he appeared differently, he was still here. 
“I really did miss you.” You mentioned, seeing the flicker of surprise, surmising the life that brought back the color in his eyes. Less dull now, and far more colorful within the beautiful amber–almost had you wishing you could stay trapped in it forever. Not forever maybe, that would mean you’d never be face to face with him directly, like now, where you stood stronger than ever. As you were more than willing to be a pillar of support for the broken man, who you guess appeared to see so much, it nearly broke his mind. For the brief moment of pause, you could see his jaw tighten, as if he was contemplating something, but wary to air out the thought. 
He held the expectation that you would’ve been more fearful of him. Or at the very least angry, god knows he fully deserves that. 
Your brows tighten, almost wincing at the knot in your forehead. You’ve done that especially way too much lately, even since Jayce’s sudden disappearance. It was a question of your own, nothing short of anger, all it really was confusion. 
Jayce seemed to notice this, drawing you out of your short-lived predicament; “You… alright?” He muttered, somewhat hesitant to draw his hand over yours. He didn’t see himself deserving enough for that yet, not until he knew that it was by all rights okay with you. Only then you nodded to reassure him, biting the inside of your cheek as the moment passed. 
Finally garnering the courage to the breadth of your chest, “How… or why have you been gone so long?” Jayce simply looks at you with a half-unreadable expression, as if he had expected this question. One way or another, he was always going to be faced with such a question. After all, he had been trapped inside the palace of the arcane, a presumably long life-time of experiences; enough to age him noticeably. 
“I'll explain it,” He paused, a waver in his tone. “In time.” Jayce’s reluctance was more than easy to notice, so you nodded, not fully satisfied with the answer. But you had to wait for answers another time, there were reasonably far more important things to deal with right now. Whatever that may be considered. 
So you opted for a hug (entirely and completely out of the blue).
The affectionate gesture, which could mean many things, surprised him. He didn’t count for this happening—it made his knees buckle, the weight hounding you to fall with him. Even with the vice grip he previously held on the handle. He let go of his hammer, wanting and using both arms to just utterly hug you back with the whole of his heart, and he was fulfilled. Nose buried in the crook of your neck, it was filled with your scent. Your own hold on him didn’t vacillate at all–which in retrospect–it gave way to a level of solace he never felt before. 
He tightened his hold on you, a silent way of giving thanks, if nothing else. You were glad, happy even that he accepted your inhibited sudden gesture. 
You leaned back, slowly but surely, just to check that Jayce wasn’t uncomfortable. It was a failure however [as good as you were at reading expressions], there was naught a hint of it at all. You tilted your head, eliciting a soft laugh from the man. 
‘Mission successful!’ 
His soft laughter elicited a pavlovian response from you, leaving you to move your hands, cradling his face with both hands once again. Anything and everything seemed to fall short around you, for the long while you began to realize, lord you were far from attached to the thought however. His brows furrowed with a small grin, still finding it somewhat amusing with your subtle acts of nature. In spite of what preceded, the decedent time of passing made him begin to freeze. 
Color began creeping up against the patches of his skin that crawled from the beginning of his mandible, nape of the neck, and now up to the cheek bones. Expression faltering. (“Hey, uh…”) He tried to muster, but despite that, it fell on deaf ears. Your gaze made him hot, and he was always on the fence on whether or not how he should react. Jayce wasn’t sure how to handle it really, cause you look at him as if he was all that was there in the room. The spark of motivation behind your learning, or even the nights and transitions of time where you listen to him talk about what makes him so inspired. Of course, he always made the effort to do the same, but it had made him wonder if you felt so similarly. 
Yet, when he allowed his overthinking to fester, never bringing it up, he was afraid and just simply decided to not ask about it at all. Jayce was always a bit afraid about these things, but with what he's been through, he fears this may be the first and last time he’s allowed to see you. 
With that being his driving force, how his heart raced, it gave him a burst of confidence. Jayce lowered his left hand to your hip, the other to holding your face. His eyes were soft, brows raised as if he were asking. It was first and foremost, but his heart continued to beat right up against the cavity of his chest. 
There was a flicker of astonishment gleaming in your eyes, but it slowly disappeared, as if you ascertained what he was wanting, and frankly you found it sweet that he had asked for your permission. Nonetheless, you were more than delighted to oblige with his request. 
Warmth blossomed exuberant in his chest, as if fireworks were being set off. The sensation it ignited in him was soulful. A first tentative brush, then a second time, more sure than ever now. Jayce’s breathing almost labored when he pulled back, and he could figure the same for you. In a way, it was as if a weight was lifted from his shoulders by such a simple act of love. Even with the moments passing, the two of you leaned against one another, relishing in the feeling that heightened your tension. 
Though it did wear off quickly enough. 
Jayce watched with patience of a thousand men as you leaned back, re-adjusting yourself as you spoke. And wasn’t it ever the truth. 
“If you’ve done that earlier, then i probably wouldn’t even be here right now.” You remarked, causing him to laugh quietly. 
(No shit.)
He should’ve done this sooner.
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pear1escence · 1 year ago
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Being Keegan’s girlfriend would entail…𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 °
Keegan p. Russ x fem!reader - explicit
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Being David Walker’s girlfriend would entail…
⭒ Late night car rides, driving around town with American oldies playing on the stereo, a cig in your hand nd his gaze shifting from the road to admire you every so often.
⭒ He’s not much for fancy dates, but he loves going out on walks with you. Strolling on beaches in the evening, loves it when you wear pretty skirts that flow with the wind. You might find a nice spot to put down a couple beach towels, share a bottle of wine and some home baked goods.
⭒ The warmth in his veins from the wine combined with your pretty face, he can’t resist kissing you. He’d pull you into his lap, his hand buried in your hair as he kisses you deeply, those delicious groans slipping from his lips as he does so.
⭒ Wouldn’t do beach sex. Sand getting everywhere, eugh. But in the car??
⭒ He’d have you riding him in the front seat, shirt pushed down, lips around your nipple, hands on your hips. He’ll bite just to hear you yelp. Can’t shut up either. He’s not shy of being vocal, groans a lot, the deep, sexy kind of sounds that has your stomach doing a flip.
⭒ Pretty average in length but his cock is thick as hell. Stretches you out so good. Hairy everywhere. Chest, thighs, nether regions. Yum.
⭒ Compliments you a lot, tells you just how pretty you look taking him so well, how good you feel. “Yeah, that’s it babe” “You’re taking it so fuckin’ well, doll” Curses a lot too.
⭒ Ok enough of that😾
⭒ He owns the comfiest, softest tees, the perfect ones to throw on in the morning with only a pair of panties underneath. You’d wear them a lot when he’s gone.
⭒ He thinks of you a lot when he’s deployed. Tries not to, he gets sad thinking of you alone.
⭒ Hugs you so deeply whenever he returns. Those comforting, safe hugs along with murmurs of how badly he’s missed you. Buries your head in the crook of his neck nd strokes your hair softly.
⭒ His heart breaks for you when he sees you cry. He’ll immediately forget about whatever he’s got on his hands. He’ll sit you down and wrap one arm around you, his hand lifting your face towards him as he asks you what the matter is.
⭒ Projecting my daddy issues onto this poor innocent (not) man very hard right now. Pls god I need him so bad
⭒ “Oh, my sweet girl” he’ll murmur, voice low and tinged with sadness, he’ll pull your legs over his lap nd wrap his arms round you tighter.
⭒ He’s very much not the perfect boyfriend, even though he wants to be.
⭒ He has his issues, struggles with PTSD which causes him to be very closed off. He hates opening up, sometimes it’s like there’s spiked wire wrapped around his throat when he tries.
⭒ He rarely seeks you out when he’s down. He can be very avoidant, scared he’ll blow up on you without meaning to. If he does come to you, he won’t talk.
⭒ He almost slumps up from tiredness, prefers it to be in your bed with your fingers drawing slow circles along his back, sweet words of affection nd loving kisses to his head.
⭒ He hates getting angry with you. The Ghosts are far from soft on one another, the rough atmosphere within his team has sometimes traveled over to you as well.
⭒ He’d never lay a hand on you. Never. But he has regrettably raised his voice at you a few times, when he’s really mad. The fear in your eyes causes him to pull back though, nd he’s quick to leave out of guilt.
⭒ He wouldn’t want you to worry for him, shoots you a couple messages about needing to blow off some steam before he takes a long drive to try and clear his mind.
⭒ He’s heavy with guilt and shame once he comes back, very soft with you in the days following.
⭒ You see the guilt in his eyes whenever he looks at you, hear it in the repeated ‘I’m sorry’s he gives you.
⭒ Why did I make this sad all of a sudden. I’m telling you I need to stop projecting my issues onto pixel men😞
I’m not gonna reread this so apologies for any misspelling, this has to be the first time I’ve posted in months?? I’ve been busy wasting time on stan twt 😖 Note - if you liked the angsty part towards the end I have a longer fic with a similar concept, ‘I miss what you’d do to me’
648 notes · View notes
moonylvs · 5 months ago
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⋆˙⟡ How did it end?
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Summary: Sirius' rebellion against his family begins to become a concern, to the point where it begins to affect others and especially your relationship, can you work things out? is it worth a second chance? ´We must know... how did it end?´
Dedicated to @mayuwolfstar who made me this request: Hi! I saw your request is open so, can I request an angst with happy ending with Sirius x reader where they fight and then he wrote a song for as an apology?
Pairing: Sirius Black x Reader
Words: 5k
ⓘ Warnings: Angst (A lot, and I mean too much that it's painful), hurt/comfort, sirius is an idiot, Mentions of Sirius' childhood (shit), practically a lot of pain, couple fights, both are idiots, second chance trope, fluff, no proofread, let me know if I miss anything!
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The last few days Sirius, in a short, had been acting like an idiot, getting into more trouble than usual and causing others to end up in detention with him.
Ever since you and Sirius started dating you knew of his constant rebelliousness, you knew that most of his actions were a form of rebellion against his family, it never really bothered you, you understood why he did what he did.
You had always adored Sirius's extroverted personality, it was something that contrasted with your more introverted personality, but this time you felt that it was no longer simply his personality, he no longer did things for his own pleasure, he did it with the mere intention of annoying his family and causing a reaction.
You wanted to ignore his actions as much as possible, repeating over and over again that Sirius knew what he was doing, that he had reasons to get annoyed and act like that, but at this point everything was reaching its limit.
You started to get annoyed as Sirius' pranks became more and more recurrent, ending up with him in detention all week, so you could barely see him or spend time with him.
And in the time he wasn't in detention, he spent his time with James, planning the next prank or shit talking about Slytherins.
It wasn't that Sirius excluded you, he always invited you to sit with them, his arm around your shoulders or around your waist caressing your hip, but you had to admit that it wasn't very entertaining to listen to James and Sirius talk for hours, they had known each other for years and had jokes and stories that you didn't know about, this made you feel slightly uncomfortable, feeling that maybe you were left out of the conversation.
Aside from this, Sirius barely tolerated seeing Regulus in the corridors, you knew he had always been like this, but this time Sirius didn't ignore him, instead he would tease him or talk badly about him knowing he could hear him, you clearly felt uncomfortable about this, feeling it was rude.
You had barely engaged in a conversation with Regulus, the little you knew was only thanks to Sirius, who only said that Regulus was a mama's boy and that he was just a puppet of his parents, Sirius didn't hold back with his words, it was constant to hear Sirius talk about how his parents used to compare them too much, saying that Regulus was the perfect son and Sirius was just a disappointment next to him.
You always tried to understand Sirius, he was your boyfriend and you always wanted to be by his side, so you never said anything about the way he talked about his brother, only he knew what he had lived through and why they had that family relationship.
Yet you were never rude to Regulus, if you saw him you simply smiled politely and that was it.
Unlike Sirius, Regulus had tried several times to talk to him, but Sirius always refused, he wouldn't even try to talk things over with his brother, even though Regulus seemed to be really interested in patching things up.
You tried to talk to Sirius, but as always, when it came to his family, there was no way you could change his mind.
“Maybe you should try talking to him…Maybe you can work things out, you don't have to hate each other because of your parents-” You said, trying to sound as calm and understanding as possible, but Sirius wouldn't even let you finish speaking.
“Talk to him? Surely he just wants to convince me to come home so I can go back to being our parents' little doll, what else would he want to talk for?” Sirius replied with some annoyance, snorting at your words.
You knew you shouldn't insist, there was no point, besides you weren't planning on forcing Sirius to talk to his brother, it was his decision at the end of the day.
So you simply sighed, nodding slightly and ending the conversation.
The next few days didn't seem to get any better, Sirius barely even paid attention to you, his mind was anywhere but reality.
The only times he would come back to reality was to tell you about the new prank he was planning, asking you to join him, to which you refused each and every time, you weren't going to break your perfect grades for a prank that would end up with you in detention.
Sirius's pranks were as ridiculous as ever, he started by hiding the Slytherin Quidditch team's uniforms and then placed itching powder on the Slytherin's beds, being especially hard on Regulus's bed.
Each of his pranks ended with him in detention and a new letter from his parents telling him how disappointed they were.
But unlike when he was a kid, Sirius no longer felt sad and distressed, he didn't give a shit anymore, he was glad his parents were pissed off.
You tried to concentrate on your business, you had more important things to worry about than if your boyfriend blew up the Slytherin common room, for example, the OWLs, which were driving you crazy.
The exams, Sirius's idiocies and the little time you had for yourself were pushing you over the edge.
That day you had a project in pairs, which only made your mood worse, you hated working in pairs, you always ended up doing everything while others took the credit.
You thought that at least this way you could spend some time with Sirius, you would do the work together and there would be no problem, in spite of everything Sirius was smart and knew you wouldn't want to risk your grade.
Bloody hell.
Your eyes widened as you watched Sirius approach James to team up, Sirius hadn't even looked in your direction to check if you already had a team, no, he had walked straight towards James, not a care in the world.
You tried to ignore the growing annoyance you felt, it's just teamwork, you repeated to yourself, it doesn't matter that they always do teamwork together, it doesn't fucking matter.
You tried not to show your annoyance, looking around the class in search of a partner, you thought of lily, she was smart and nice, but she was already paired with Pandora, your gaze went to Marlene, but in an instant Mary was already by her side.
You wanted to curse Sirius out loud, you guys always teamed up, you made a good team, but no, today he decided he didn't want to work with you.
You didn't want to take it personally, just because you were a couple didn't mean you had to do everything together, but you couldn't help but be annoyed by the fact that he didn't even look in your direction.
“You don't have a partner?” You heard a voice speak behind you, you wanted to curse even more.
Regulus.
You knew it wasn't a good idea, you knew it was the worst idea in the world, but right now you didn't give a fuck.
“No...Do you want to work together?” You said politely, at that moment you knew it was all going to go to shit.
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“Regulus?! You teamed up with Regulus?! What the fuck is wrong with you?!” Sirius' voice echoed in the room, his face utterly annoyed.
The instant Sirius saw you talking to Regulus his face paled, his hands balled into fists and in mere minutes you were in the room, his annoyance unleashed on you.
“It's just a team project Sirius, I needed a partner-”
“And of all people you had to pick my fucking brother! What the fuck is wrong with you?” Sirius replied, shouting in your direction.
Instantly you tensed up, Sirius had never yelled at you, you had seen him yell at other people, but with you he would just walk out of the room until he calmed down, because he didn't want to unleash his anger on you, though his silence wasn't much better than his yelling.
The black-haired guy would often leave you talking to yourself, saying he needed time to calm down, hours later he would come back, mumbling “I'm an idiot, I'm sorry” while hugging you, and then he would go back to normal, he wouldn't say anything about the fight, he wouldn't really apologize or face the problem, and that frustrated you too much.
You felt your chest squeeze at Sirius' words, you hadn't meant to hurt him, maybe deep down you wanted to upset him a bit for choosing James and not you for the teamwork, but still his reaction seemed over the top to you.
“I didn't think it would bother you so much, you teamed up with James, I needed a team and Regulus offered” You said, trying to keep your voice calm, you didn't want to make a fuss, you didn't want to turn it into a fight, even though deep down you knew it already was.
Most of the time when you had disagreements, you were the one who tried to talk to him and ended up working things out, but over time you realized how hard it was for Sirius to solve problems by talking,
In this time you had discovered that Sirius wasn't the best at communicating, you wanted to blame it on his complicated childhood, but finding an excuse didn't make the pain in your chest lessen.
“Are you serious? You're upset because I teamed up with James? How old are you? Ten years old? Grow up please” Sirius said harshly, his tone without a hint of warmth, he was totally blinded by annoyance.
Your mouth fell open in surprise, not a word came out, you didn't understand how Sirius could talk like that, it seemed like all his frustration was coming out after building it up for months.
“Would you calm down?” you said sharply, totally fed up with Sirius' yelling.
“I only teamed up with him because he offered and there were no better options, I'm only doing it for my grade, I didn't think it would be that much trouble but now I see it is” You said harshly, instantly you realized it sounded totally insensitive, you cursed yourself, but it was too late.
“Sure, you didn't think it would be a problem, you never think of anyone but yourself.”
You felt your face instantly pale, his words hit you hard, making a pressure appear in your chest.
Since always you had put the priorities of others above your own, you didn't care if others did things that would hurt you, you liked to please them, you liked to please them, you did everything in your power to make the people around you happy, you kept quiet about your discomfort.
Sirius was the clear example of this, you had ignored his hours making jokes, you didn't say a word when he started spending less time with you for spending time with James, you didn't care when Mcgonnagal scolded you for helping Sirius pass his subject with cheating, you didn't care at all if Sirius was happy.
So to hear Sirius say that you didn't care about anything but yourself was a low blow.
“What the fuck is that supposed to mean, Sirius?” You said, your voice still sounded annoyed but there was something else, hurt.
“Oh come on, now you're going to get in my face about all the things you've done for me, aren't you?” Said Sirius sarcastically, letting out a hollow laugh that made your stomach churn.
“You're just like them” Sirius said quietly, more as a statement to himself.
In that instant you felt your breath catch, you knew perfectly well who he was referring to, “they” were his family, you felt nauseous at being compared to them.
Those people who had hurt Sirius so much, those who had abused and insulted him, those who had made Sirius' childhood hell, Sirius was comparing you to them.
“N-No, Sirius you're being mean, stop it” You said in barely a whisper, shaking your head, you couldn't believe the words coming out of Sirius' mouth.
“Now I'm the bad guy?” Sirius replied sarcastically. “You're the one who teamed up with my bloody brother who I've told you I loathe, you're the one who's been insisting that I fix things with him, you don't care about anyone but yourself, you just want to fix things so you can get on with your perfect bloody life, you want me to fix things with Regulus so that way I can be the perfect little brother!”
Sirius' words were full of annoyance and anger, he knew what he was doing.
“You always try to fix everything around you, you always want everything to be perfect and happy, well I tell you what? You can't fix me! No matter how hard you try you can't do it, I'm never going to be the perfect brother, or the perfect boyfriend, so give up once and for all” Sirius spat in frustration, though you could see in his eyes a glimpse of pain, he wasn't just yelling at you, he was yelling at his family, at all those who hurt him, who made him believe that something was wrong with him.
You felt your chest tighten, tears stung your eyes, you couldn't stand another minute in that room, you felt suffocated, overwhelmed.
“I-I never wanted to fix you, there was never anything wrong with you…” You said in barely a whisper, before leaving the room without looking back.
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You wanted to pretend that you didn't care about the fight with Sirius, you wanted to pretend that you didn't care about the fact that he hadn't come looking for you, but in reality it was killing you.
You didn't understand how it had ended up like this, you had never had a fight like this with Sirius, your stomach turned over just remembering the way you had talked to each other.
You could barely concentrate on your classes, the guilt invaded you, you felt that maybe if you hadn't teamed up with Regulus none of this would have happened.
And about Regulus, you could barely talk to him and it was only for work, you couldn't help but resent him a little, because it was his fault that you had fought with Sirius, even though he hadn't meant to, that's how Sirius felt? Now you understood him a bit, how could you not resent the one who made the people you loved hate you?
You tried not to be rude to Regulus, in your heart you didn't have the strength to blame him, in spite of everything, you wanted to be kind and do the job in peace, but a pressure in your chest settled every time you saw him.
Without Sirius your days were much quieter, sure, you spent time with your friends, but it wasn't even the same, there was an emptiness that you couldn't fill.
You didn't even know what was going on between you and Sirius anymore, was it just a break? or was it the end?
You didn't want to believe it, you didn't want to think that your relationship would end because of a stupid fight.
It had only been a week since the fight and you could barely stand it, the guilt and the feelings invaded you, the thoughts overwhelmed you so much that you could hardly find the strength to get out of bed.
Sirius wasn't much better off than you, his pranking streak had stopped, not a single prank had happened since their fight, if you saw him with James he barely spoke, James couldn't find a way to get his attention, Sirius' mind was elsewhere.
As distressed as Sirius looked, he wasn't looking for you, and it was killing you, if he was hurting as much as you were why wasn't he trying to fix things? Sirius wondered the same thing about you.
By the weekend the news spread quickly that Gryffindor was having a party, Sirius wasn't thrilled at all.
Sirius, along with James and Remus, used to play at parties, sort of like a little band, it was just for fun, they would play covers of their favorite songs and every now and then a song they had written themselves.
But Sirius didn't have the heart to play, you were the one who always cheered him up, who was always in the crowd cheering him on and looking at him with those bright eyes, but if you weren't there what was the point?
James insisted for hours, telling him that he had to get out of the room and live a little, but Sirius couldn't find the strength to do it, he wanted to make things right with you, but he didn't even know where to start.
“Why don't you invite her to the party? It's your chance to fix things with her” James said, to which Sirius instantly scoffed, as if James had said something stupid.
“And you think she's going to agree to come after the way I talked to her? That's the stupidest idea I've ever heard” Sirius replied with annoyance, when it came to you he was totally defensive.
“I'm just trying to help you, you're not helping yourself you know” James replied more firmly, he was the only one who dared to put Sirius in his place when he acted like that. “I can tell Lily and have her bring her in, you take care of the rest” James offered, his face softening slightly, he knew Sirius was hurt, you were hurt too.
Sirius hesitated for a moment, his lips tightening as he thought, he knew he didn't have much of a choice and time was running out, so he ended up sighing slightly before nodding.
This was his last chance.
When Lily showed up at your door that night you knew you were screwed, you knew what she was coming for.
“I'm not going, it's not up for discussion” You said the moment Lily suggested you two go to the party.
You weren't in the mood to go to a party, especially when you knew Sirius would be playing there with his band, you didn't want to see him, your stomach turned at the thought of it.
“You can't stay in your room forever” Lily said with a small smile, sitting down next to you on the bed. “It would do you good to get out a bit, you always loved the gryffindor parties.”
“That was because Sirius was with me” You muttered under your breath, more as an affirmation to yourself, but Lily came to hear you.
“You could try to talk to him today, you know, try to fix things” Lily suggested, bringing her hand to yours and giving it a gentle squeeze.
You hesitated for a moment, before shaking your head slightly, sighing.
“I'm tired of being the one who fixes things, while Sirius acts like it's nothing, I seem to be the only one who cares about the relationship” You said, feeling your chest tighten.
Lily looked at you sympathetically, squeezing your hand lightly, she understood your frustration and couldn't blame you for feeling this way.
“I'm not asking you to go to the party for Sirius, let's go together, if you feel it's too much we'll come back here and pretend nothing has ever happened” Lily said softly, giving you a small smile “And only if you want you can talk to Sirius, I know you don't want to leave things like this, you've never been like this."
You felt your chest tighten, you knew that lily's words were true, you didn't like to stay like this, without an ending, you wanted to tell sirius how you felt, you wanted to understand what he felt, but you also knew that you were tired, you didn't want to keep trying.
“I…fine, I'll go” You answered quietly, you weren't going to fix things with sirius, you were going to talk things over with him, to tell him why you acted like that, to find out why he acted like that, you weren't going for your boyfriend back, you were going for your peace of mind, because you needed to know, you needed to be calm, you needed things to end well.
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The music and the smell of alcohol flooded the gryffindor common room, everyone seemed to be in their own world, laughing and dancing as if they didn't have any problems in life.
You on the other hand felt as if all your problems were in that common room, as if they were drowning you.
Lily's hand on yours were the only thing keeping you grounded, you could hear Marlene and Mary shout Lily's name and yours from across the room, trying to get your attention.
In a few moments you walked through the crowd of people, reaching the improvised bar where the girls were seated, both greeted you, Marlene ruffled your hair affectionately, saying how pretty you looked that night.
Marlene seemed to you to be the only one who didn't treat you with pity or shame, sure, you were grateful that they were considerate about your situation with Sirius, but they all treated you as if without Sirius you were no one else, as if you were going to die without him.
Deep down you felt that way, but you hated to think that others saw you that way, Marlene was the only one who treated you normally, who asked you about you and not about Sirius, you had no way to thank her.
You spent the rest of the night drinking and dancing to the music, you realized how much you missed spending time with your friends besides Sirius, this is how Sirius must have felt with James.
You didn't see Sirius all night, this only increased your anxiety, you wondered if maybe he wasn't well, for a moment you regretted going, you thought that while you were having fun Sirius must be having a bad time.
But at that moment you heard a guitar start to play, your gaze went to where the sound was coming from, the students had set up a small improvised stage, just a few microphones and some lights, on the stage was Sirius' band.
Sirius was wearing that black leather jacket he loved so much, the same one you had given him for his last birthday, you felt your heart stop for an instant, the world around you seemed to disappear.
Your gaze was fixed on Sirius, your feet moved instinctively, in a moment you were standing in front of the stage, still behind some people, not wanting to make your presence known yet.
Marlene stood next to you, as did Lily, both watching you expectantly, as if they expected you to collapse at that moment, but you didn't.
In that moment you didn't feel pain, you didn't feel like screaming or insulting him, instead, you felt like you were seeing a stranger, like you were seeing Sirius for the first time.
You felt like you were going back to the first day you saw Sirius, standing on that stage, with his shiny black hair, with those piercing eyes.
The rest of the people at the party were in their own world, going to a gryffindor party was like disconnecting from everything else, the atmosphere was pure freedom, the lights were blinding and the music flooded the place, but for you, the moment the band started playing, everything changed.
You couldn't recognize the melody instantly, which seemed strange to you, you knew by heart every song the band played, from covers to the band's own songs.
“I saw her in the rightest way.”
The first line was sung by Sirius, as usual, but something felt different, something about this song was special, somehow it made your heart stir without you knowing the reason.
Your gaze remained fixed on Sirius, each word made your heart beat faster, it felt like a declaration, but it was too unexpected to be real.
In your mind it didn't fit that Sirius could have written a song about you or for you, he had once mentioned it to you, but at this moment it felt too unreal.
“And then, she came up to my knees, Begging, baby, would you please? Do the things you said you'd do to me, to me.”
You could feel your heart beating too hard with each line, something in your heart stirred, as if your heart recognized that melody from another life.
For an instant Sirius' gaze lifted, and fell right on you, his eyes shined like never before, you felt your heart pounding in your chest, just like the first time.
“Oh, won't you kiss me on the mouth and love me like a sailor?”
That line Sirius sang right into your eyes, as if there was no one else in the room, as if he was talking to you and not singing in front of a crowd.
For a moment you felt all the annoyance, frustration and pain fade away slowly, with just one look you felt it all fade away, the way Sirius sang, the way he looked at you, it felt so sincere.
"I don't believe in God, but I believe that you're my savior"
You could swear there was nothing else in that room, Sirius's gaze was fixed on you like the first time, his eyes sparkling with every line he sang, those words stirred something in you.
“You are my savior” You could remember Sirius saying it over and over again, when you helped him with a math problem or when you comforted him after receiving a letter from his parents.
But this, it felt so much stronger.
The rest of the song passed slowly, which you were grateful for, it was as if the song pierced your heart, every single thing you had wished Sirius had said to you, there it was.
“We can go forever until you wanna sit it out.”
Your mind filled with memories, of all the time you had spent with Sirius, each memory making something in your heart stir, all the memories before the fight coming back to you, the endless hours in Sirius's room talking about nothing but understanding everything, those moments where with a single look you could tell each other everything, Sirius's voice seemed to echo in your heart, making you forget about everything else.
At this point Sirius' eyes were shining like never before, there was not only love, there was vulnerability, there was regret, there was sweetness, the song was so personal and yet so public, because everyone in that room knew that the song was about you and for you.
The moment the song ended you felt yourself letting out the air you didn't know you were holding, your heart was beating too hard and you could feel the tears stinging in your eyes, Sirius's look said more than a thousand words, deep inside you still wanted to run, to run away, but this, a song, was what made you stop, because you knew this was just a part of the recovery.
Sirius knew it too, because the moment the song ended he came down from the stage, crossing the crowd until he reached you.
Everyone expected a kiss, something dramatic Sirius style, but the moment Sirius had you in front of him he wrapped his arms around your body, pulling you to his chest and holding you as if he feared you would disappear, you knew this was much deeper than a kiss.
For a moment you stood still, nothing came out of your mouth, a single tear rolled down your cheek, Sirius was quick to wipe it away and leave a kiss in its place.
“You are not like them, you could never be, you are so much better, you are the best thing that ever happened to me, you are what makes me wake up every day, I don't want anyone else, I don't want you to change, I want you and only you.” Sirius murmured in your ear, still hugging you tightly, in just a few days he had discovered how much he missed your scent and holding you in his arms.
“I promise I will be better, for you and for me, because I want to be the best version of me, because I want you to have the real Sirius, the one who has loved you since the first time I saw you from the stage.” You felt something in your stomach flutter like the first time, everything around you faded away, there was nothing but you and Sirius.
“If you need space I'll be fine with that, I'll wait for you as long as it takes, I'll get better and let you have the best version of me, because that's what you deserve, I just don't want to lose you, not you, I want you to be the one I spend the rest of my days with.”
Sirius' voice was so sincere and vunerable, there was not a single doubt in his voice, in that moment you felt everything change, your relationship was not defined by your fights, nor by what others thought, much less by what others considered you, your relationship was you, the real you, those who were truly in love and who recognized their mistakes and knew how to get better together, those who were willing to try.
Your arms wrapped around Sirius' figure, your face going to his neck, your voice was barely a whisper, full of feeling and affection.
“I've always wanted you, I always knew it would be you.”
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Omggg, love writing this, I never write stories with the trope of second chances because being honest I don't give second chances but omg it's sirius so who cares, love writing this, hope you like it, xoxo
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solaiced · 6 months ago
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CASE 18: HIGURUMA AND NANAMI SAID WHAT?!
!content!: praise, 3some, nanami is SHAMELESS, and so is higuruma, and secret arrangement.
wc: 966
solace: please guys be happy i posted a lot.
。・:*:・゚★,。・:*:・゚☆
Higuruma and Nanami are
respected lawyers, with a ruthless reputation. So, imagine your
surprise when your boss, Nanami, calls you, his little assistant, in his office, to ask you something so ridiculous and unimaginable, that
you burst out laughing.
Yeah. You, the shy and reserved assistant, who brought coffee to your boss and co-workers in the morning to cheer them up, laughed in Mr. Nanami's face.
"I assume it's a no?" The blond man asks, only a tiny bit embarassed.
"Wait, you meant it for real?" you stop clutching your stomach, the realisation dawning on you.
"Yes. You are useful in a lot of things at the office, so Higuruma and I... figured you wouldn't mind the extra workload. This... isn't a test, by the way. We just wanted to know. You won't be fired if you say yes or no. Nor will we need to speak of this again." His deep, comforting voice calmed you slightly. But, again, why you? Plenty of women at work swooned over them, so why did they choose you?
"W-why me, specifically?" You clear your throat nervously.
"Because, you're my assistant"
Nanami responds clearly, without a single stutter or hint of taking it back.
"So, will you aid us? If not, you're dismissed, but if I hear a single
word about this conversation...”
“No! I'll do it. " You slam your hands on his desk, making him look up in surprise.
“Ah, and you don’t feel coerced, yes? Because you shouldn't be." He glides his hand ever yours, rubbing it comfortingly.
"No, I'll do it.” You repeat, more stern but less aggressive.
"Then," The blond gets up elegantly, taking off his tie. "Let’s get started. Hiromi." He calls out, and something moves behind you, presses. itself against you and places its hands on your hip.
Higuruma. You tilt your head to look but Nanami grabs your chin, making you face him.
"We're starting tonight. Don't make too much noise, though. There might be people working overtime. And God knows how much Nanami hates overtime.
Gargling, you look up at your boss with teary eyes, getting slammed into his cock by your other boss’s cock thrusting into you.
“That’s it, sweetie. You got this.”
Nanami praises you, the effect of it not lost on your gaping pussy.
Higuruma grunts behind you, hands gripping your hips so hard you could already see the bruises forming in the shape of his fingers.
"You can take him," he chuckles as you feel his tip bully your cervix and g-spot simultaneously.
Who knew the respected lawyer of Tokyo, Higuruma Hiromi, had a big dick?
Well, not you. You squirmed, hips
moving when the brown haired man let go off them to push your head into Nanami's girthy dick. You wish they were as disheveled as you.
But their breaths showed they were not as composed as you thought they were. Nanami’s usually gel slicked back hair had fallen to cover his cloudy, lustful and both of their suits had been undone in the rush of undressing to fuck you.
"You feel so good... Fuck, we chose well, didn't we, Hiro?" The man in front of you addresses his equal, fingers weaving through your hair whilst you obediently sucked and jerked him off.
Higuruma taps your ass, rythmically thrusting, dragging his heavy cock in and out of your shutty cunt sucking him in like a siren's sultry song.
It lures him in, deep into your trap,
“Fuck, yes, baby, yes. Our little stress reliever.” A few deep thrusts, slamming into you punishingly and causing your tits to graze the desk painfully, he adds, “I’m gonna cum. You gonna take all of it?”
You try to nod as much as you can, mouth full of cock. Said cock's owner humming, throwing his head back.
"Me too. Don't waste a single drop, okay, sweetheart? "Nanami slides his rough hand to your bulging throat, feeling himself move. Suddenly, he pulls out, pushing your cheek against the desk.
"Open wide, I'm not going easy.
After all, you are my thrust worthy assistant, so you can take it, right?” Is all he says before plunging his dick down your throat, a garbled moan, muted by the meat covering your mouth, escaping.
Higuruma moans, hips slowing ever-so slightly and giving you the least bit of reprieve from the slaps your chit received due to his balls.
“C-Cumming-ngh!" He warns before his hips stop flush to your ass as warmth fills you to the point of overflow.
When the man behind you comes down from his high, he pulls out, kneels and presses his fingers to your fluttering and gaping hole, keeping the semen inside.
"Fuck, that's hot..." Nanami groans, and he shuddered in pleasure. His body spoke for him, his tip kept hiting the back of your throat and made you gag.
He chuckles as his friend fingers you to the point of insanity. You keen, eyes crossing and the image of your superior blurred, your back arches and your noises' volume multiply by ten despite the efforts the men were using to quiet them down.
"Now!" The man holding your head down gasps and shoots his load in your mouth to the brim.
You were so full from both ends, you couldn't think. You swallow as much as you can, some of the cum even dribbling down onto the floor and Nanami sighs in disappointment, you feel somewhat ashamed you disappointed him.
“Make sure to get all of it, next time. I'm—We're counting on you." The blond fixes your ruffled hair and his friend wipes your thighs, putting your skirt back in its place.
Nanami and Higuruma were as ruthless in bed as they were in court, you're recently discovered. But your job is to help them, isn’t it, little assistant?
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pedriache · 6 months ago
Note
Pau with a girlfriend who has a condition who makes her faint a lot? I feel like he’d be so attentive and caring
I can and I will — Pau Cubarsí.
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Pairing: Pau Cubarsí x Fem!Reader
Summary: Having extremely low blood pressure was the norm for you, but ever since you started dating Pau, he’d taken it more seriously than you had. And you loved him for it.
Word count: 700+
Disclaimer/s: Mentions of fainting , low blood pressure , accidents that’s happened from the condition , ect.
A/N: I didn’t want to write about something I couldn’t capture accurately buttt I used to have very low blood pressure and would faint because of it so I just went with this …
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Pau was very… attentive. He noticed the slightest wobble in your step, the way your eyes seemed to go dull, or when you’d heat up. He’d taken every precaution to assure you wouldn’t faint. He worried a lot, and you hated to make him stress so much.
It was a particularly hot summer day, so the two of you decided it was best to stay inside. Pau had set his bedroom in the specific way you liked, almost like a cocoon of pillows and blankets. You’d planned on binge watching the new season of your favorite show, but you’d forgotten one simple thing.
“Shit.” You grumble, turning to your boyfriend. “I need to go get water.”
Pau nods in understanding, concern flashing across his face. “You sure you wanna go get it? I don’t mind—“
“Pau, babe.” You groan, “i’m fine. Sit back, chill out.”
Sometimes his protectiveness agitated you. It made you feel like you couldn’t do anything, despite knowing he didn’t mean to make you feel that way. You knew your words may have hurt him, so you compensate by placing a quick and tender kiss to his lips.
Sliding your legs over the side of the bed, you stand. Too quick. Your vision zooms in and out, spotting all around. Great. You were too slow to sit back down, your knees giving out beneath you.
Before you could fall, you feel Pau’s arms wrap around your torso, successfully stopping your tumble. “I told you I should’ve..” He trails off with a grumble, pushing the hair from your face as you collect your breathing.
“Don’t rub it in.” You grumble, the nauseating feeling pooling in your stomach as you allow yourself to slump into his arms.
“Lay down, i’ll go get you water and some crackers.” Pau frowns, planting a kiss to your forehead. He did that a lot, you’d noticed it was his way of checking your temperature without being obvious. “And some ibuprofen.”
Weakly climbing back into your cocoon, you toss the fuzzy blanket aside to let your body cool down. Your eyes remain closed even when you hear Pau’s heavy footsteps coming closer.
“Sit up.” He urges quietly, sitting on the edge of the bed with a glass of ice water and medicine in his hands, and crackers tucked under his arm.
You do as told, rubbing your temples. “What would I do without you?”
“Hit your head on a sharp object? Oh wait, you actually have already done that before.” He quips, the corner of his lip twitching, causing you to roll your eyes.
“Ha ha.” You mumble, taking the water and pills gratefully. “Thank you.”
“Always.” He says, giving you a genuine, but short smile. Every time you fainted or came close to it, he felt his heart stop. Sometimes, he felt like he could faint from concern.
Once you take the pills and drink your water, you get comfortable again with Pau climbing onto the bed beside you. He pulls you half way onto his chest, pressing play on the TV.
While you munch away and regain your strength, Pau’s fingers play with your hair, tucking strands behind your ear and repeating the soothing motion. When you finally feel better, you glance up at him.
“I love you, y’know that, right?”
Pau tilts his head down to meet your gaze, a smile forming. “Of course I do. I love you, too.”
Your lips form a tight lipped, almost shameful, smile, “I feel bad, you shouldn’t have to baby me. I should’ve thought about this stuff before we got into bed.”
“Hey,” his eyebrows furrow, “you don’t always have to do things on your own. I’m your boyfriend, I love you, and If I can help, I will. Always.”
You couldn’t control yourself. You loved this boy more than anything in the world. Setting your half eaten bag of crackers aside, you roll on top of him, placing kisses all across his face. All the while, you murmur dozens of ‘I love you’s’.
Pau chuckles through your burst of affection, putting a stop to it only so his hands could cup your cheeks. He pulls your face to his lips, greeting yours in a long, warm kiss.
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likes , comments , and reblog’s are all appreciated. lmk if you’d like to be tagged in any pau related posts.
DTS , @halfwayhearted @spidybaby @unx100to !
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thatnonameuser · 7 months ago
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The Red King holds a Bleeding Head
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A Wonderland of Yanderes - Masterlist Chapter 1. Heartslaybul Part 5.
"But about your mom, could you tell me about her? She sounds like a really nice lady." Is what you asked.
Because you couldn't help but be a little curious. This is so alien to you that the idea of Deuce loving his mother in a completely wholesome way sounds so outlandish in a world of obsessive love is so hard to comprehend that you can't help but be interested.
Deuce's eyes light up like fireworks at your question. Sure, you might be endearing yourself to him more like this, but still, your pickings on information in this world are kind of slim, so you'll take whatever you can get.
Especially considering the bad ending of this misadventure ends with you sending the rest of your life as someone’s possession.
"Y-You want to hear about her?" Deuce's eyes light up at you, wanting to talk about his mother.
"If you want to." You repeat with the same enthusiasm.
"W-well, she's amazing. She works really hard and...." Deuce's speaks enthusiastically about his mom and all the fond childhood memories he has of her. All the way back to Sam's shop to get another carton of eggs, and all the way back to Main Street. It's shockingly normal, the stories he tells about her, and it has to be one of the sweetest of things you've witnessed thus far.
Until you remember the fact that means Deuce had a relatively normal mother-son relationship, meaning his yandere behavior was caused by something else or, even worse, is intertwined in his very being.
Back on your world, usually, people who became obsessed with someone to the point of doing horrible acts to keep someone to themselves had some sort of trauma or past relationship that pushed them into doing such horrible things.
But so far, everyone that you met was moderately normal. They acted in a way that was completely normal or had some quirks that were somewhat normal in your world. Like Cater's social media addiction, for example.
If they are normal, does that mean that they, no, does that mean that everyone here was just born this way? And they just accepted this behavior was normal? There has to be something more to it, right?
You're struck with a thought as Deuce is talking. He hasn't told you about his dad yet. That's not to say that it's wrong that he doesn't have a dad. It's just for a world that romanisticises a love life and marriage that never ends even when one side of it really, really wants to, it's odd that Deuce's mom is a single mother. Did her darling pass away or something?
Well, it's a question you'd like answered. Because maybe it will answer your other question. The death of a parent is deeply traumatic for a child and can maybe a way to explain the growing madness of the world you're in. So, there is no time like the present to ask.
"Uh, hey, Deuce," you say, and he’s quiet, ready to hear whatever you have to say. You swallow roughly, you hope that this won't go wrong,"... I know that this might be a difficult topic, but....how do you feel about your dad?"
The small smile on Deuce's face sours immediately. You can see anger in his eyes, as if the very reminder of his father's existence is capable of working him up into a fury. Ok, so that was a sore subject.
You quickly backtrack, "I'm sorry if that was a sore subject-"
He shakes his head, but the silent rage that you'd seen before is back as he explains, "I never met him, and he should be grateful I never did."
Shit, were you right in thinking that Deuce's dad was a darling. Had he run away, and Deuce hated him for breaking his mother's heart!?
"You must hate him a lot, huh?" You say uneasily. Given Deuce's delinquent days, he probably would have no qualms killing his father if he got the chance.
"More than anything. After how much he hurt my mom..." he trails off, voice deep with anger.
"How does that work? I thought darlings were the powerless ones, how did he hurt your mom?" Now Deuce is the confused one, he gives you a funny look.
"Prefect, I think you're confused."
"What? But I thought-"
"_____, my mom's a darling...."
Wait, that's possible!? "B-but I thought -" You had thought that darlings basically had no say in how their lives went once in captivity. So wait, if Deuce's mom is a darling, then his dad is...."Oh. Oh! So you hate your dad because of what he did to your mom?"
When Deuce nods, you can feel a rush of relief. So a life in captivity isn't the end all of all darlings and it is possible, and more importantly legal, to escape yanderes. Thank the Seven for that one, and apologies to Deuce's mom for the misunderstanding.
Now, all you have to do is figure the escaping part out before you're saddled with a child. If things get that bad, at least.
"So, wait, how does that work? I thought darlings had to stay with their yanderes?"
Deuce shakes his head, "We're from the Queendom of Roses, and they're pretty strict about that stuff so.....wait, is it not the same in your world?"
"What? No, why?" You say almost automatically. Your world has to be the farthest thing from this one.
"It's just -" He trails off before changing his words,"I've been wondering if your world is anything like ours... But do you not have darling laws in your world?"
"Well...." How can you put this in a way that can't be misunderstood? Your world doesn't believe in whatever psychotic idea this world bases their love lives on. So how can you say it that won't make you sound like a darling.
Maybe you could be honest. Or at least, sort of.
"Well, to be honest, my world doesn't really like the whole darling thing. They think it's abusive."
Deuce looks completely flabbergasted, as if you told him something incredulous. "But that’s not true!"
"But they think it is, besides in a way I kind of get it."
Now he looks confused. "What do you mean?"
"Deuce, would you do anything that your dad did to your mom to your future darling?"
"No." He says, completely serious. "I never would."
Well, it's time to crush that idea. "But what if you did it on accident? Maybe you might think that you're protecting them or loving them, but you’re actually hurting them unintentionally.....Do you really want to risk that?"
His serious look on his face falters, and you don't let up. "B-Back in my world, all the stuff you learn about Darlings is illegal. So we're not allowed to do anything to get them no matter how much we want to. It's because everyone thought our treatment of them was too harsh, so they made it illegal."
"But that's not fair," He argues, "what about-"
You aren't going to let him talk about how bad it is for the kidnappers and abusers, maybe a change in perspective will help your argument. "It's not really fair, but I get it. I wouldn't want to be stolen from my family and be forced to love someone else. Would you?"
The look he gives you is conflicted. He's, at the very least, considering what you said.
Is there a chance?
The slightest chance that he can be persuaded out of his yandere ways? Does he care about his future darling want to even risk making her unhappy?
"Prefect?"
"Yes, Deuce?"
"If I-" His eyes avoid yours as he rephrases, "If you were my darling, would you hate me for doing that to you? Taking you away from your friends and family?"
That was- that was one hell of a hypothetical.
Did he know about your status, or is he just using you as an example? Either way...."Would you hate me if I did that to you and your mom?" You dodge the question. You were always going to dodge that question. You were no darling, no matter how much this world says otherwise.
"But pre- _____," Deuce pushes you for a response, as if he needs one to live the rest of his life, "Would you hate me?"
"I would." You say point-blank. And it's the truth. He turns away from you, not wanting to meet your eyes. Still, you're prepared to rub salt into that wound. You give his shoulder a gentle squeeze. If he feels guilty, then good. Feel guilty. If he was considering it. Then now he probably won't. And he turns back to you "But you wouldn't do that to me, would you? After all, you're my friend Deuce."
He doesn't reply. Out of guilt, or contemplation. You don't care. And if it fixes him, then you need to be mean about it.
"C'mon, Ace is probably wondering where we are." He nods, still silent.
Maybe there's a chance that you can fix them, just maybe.....
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....you weren't cut out to be a baker.
After another grueling hour of making and topping that gargantuan tart, your arms hurt so badly that they felt like falling off. A whole day of exercise is going to make you real sore tomorrow.
How Trey did this for his dorm without pay, you don't understand. Because you didn't even want to do this and you don't even get to eat this delicious looking tart. Thanks again, Ace...
"Finished!" The victory cheer that Ace and Grim let out is the polar opposite of Deuce's.
"Fin..ished." You can't tell if this depressed cheer is because of all the hard work you've had to do, or because of that conversation you had on the way here.
"Did something happen to him while you were shopping?"
"He's still in shock." Oh, probably because he had his whole world being being flipped. But since he clearly loves his mother, you were a little surprised that he was this upset from it. The truth hurts, but it's probably for the best that you let that stab wound scab with a extra helping of salt. "Better let him work through this one himself."
"For sixteen years, I was so sure...." And for sixteen years, you were lied to. If that's what he was talking about.
"Yeah, whatever. I'm pretty beat. Making tarts sure takes it outta you."
"Yes, and now we can just give this to Riddle, and this headache is over." And it'll probably won't, cause life is such a dick.
"Hey fam!" And you were right. Another headache comes into the kitchen. Yay! "You look wrecked. Are the tarts done?"
"Ooh, those look sooo cute. Lemme snap a quick pic for Magicam!"
"Wa-" You don't even have a chance to move out of the frame before the bright flash goes off. Again.
"What, NOW you decide to show up?"
"I just came to see how hard my little newbs were working." Or to reap the rewards of all your hard work. But out of everything this could be much worse.
"It's tough work if you're not used to it. But there's no better cure for the ails of fatigue than something sweet from the oven!"
"Ooh finally!" You cheer, clapping your hands. Out of everything you went through in one day, something good will finally come all this BS.
"Pretty funny how you managed to show right when it was ready to eat, Cater." Free food means you don't are about Cater's shenanigans. Unless he takes too much then you're going to be mad.
"Mmm...That smells so good!" For what feels like the first time today you actually agree with Grim.
You take your first bite, and you feel like you've been set on cloud nine. It's delicious. Light, creamy, sugary and nutty. If this world's priorities weren't ass backwards you would consider staying just to try all the desserts it had to offer. You can't help the little jumps you make as you take your second bite.
"Rich in flavour, yet not too sweet...It's like chestnuts are dancing across my tongue!"
"Is that...a good thing?"
"Of course, it is! What I've give to eat these forever!" You say, dreamily. No wonder Riddle threw Ace out. You would've if they ate one of your tarts and they tasted like this.
"Oh, Trey! You gotta do the thing." Wait, what was Cater talking about?
"What thing?" You ask mid-chew.
"Oh...that thing." Ok, now you're spooked. What thing?
"Uh, Wanna fill me in here?"
"What's everyone's favorite food?" Kay. Weird thing to say after a mystery thing enters the chat. Wait now Cater's got you doing it, damn it.
Ace, Deuce and Grim all list off their favorite foods, "What about you, _____?" You respond in turn, with your favorite food, still what does that have to do with-
" All right, you've got it.....Let's 'Paint the Roses'!" A spark of magic goes off, but otherwise does nothing.
Regardless, you hit with another wave of deja vu. A set of clubs, and specifically, the three of clubs had been painting the roses red in your dream. So why was your dream connecting with real life?
"Huh? What does that mean?"
"Take another bite of your tart and see." You, hesitantly, take a small bite of your tart. But you don't taste the chestnuts, or the cream, or the even the sugar.
You taste home. You taste the birthdays you had with this on the menu. The sad nights where this was the only thing that could cheer you up. That one restaurant that made it perfectly and the nights you tried and failed to recreate it in your kitchen. It's so perfect it brings tears to your eyes.
The taste reminds you of home. A home you can't go back to. That has your friends and family waiting for you. Oh seven, are they looking for you? Are they worried? Are they panicking because you're gone? Even if they saw you leave, who the hell would believe a magic carriage poofed a kid out of the known universe?!
"_____? You're crying..." You instinctively reach up and wipe it away, you really were crying.
"S-Sorry, it really is my favorite food and....and it tastes like home." You say with a sad smile. "H-How did you do that?"
"It's my signature spell. Technically, it's 'overwriting characteristics'. I can change taste, color, smell and whatever. It only lasts for a little while." Well that's both cool and dangerous. Cool, because you can change so many things for a short time. And dangerous, because that whatever is carrying a ton. Does that mean he can change the characteristics of a person? Or a completely erase something from reality for a while? Curiouser and curiouser. "But it is kinda like covering up the real thing hence, 'painting'."
"If I had magic like that, I could be eatin' canned tuna every meal of every day!"
"You would do that, wouldn't you, Grim?"
"That's way better than Riddle's stupid collar magic."
"You love tempting fate, don't you Grim. The last thing we need right now is him popping outta nowhere again." You scratch your fingers through his fur, with a chuckle.
Trey doesn't seem to agree with Grim's compliment, "Oh, Riddle's magic's in a whole other league. His signature spell is a weapon. Mine's just a childish prestidigitation."
Is he insecure about it, or something? His magic is pretty cool, and the only reason you're really afraid of it is because of the fact that changing characteristics is pretty broad.
"Hey, don't beat yourself up. Yours is cool in your own way. His is just a little.....dictator-y."
Trey smiles at you, "Thanks, _____." Well, isn't that great. Now all we have to do is-
"Speaking of Riddle-it's too late to give him these now. Let's call it a day and do it tomorrow." Spoke too soon. Great, just great. You think the compliment would have buttered him up a little. Well, at least you just have to barricade your door.
"Don't forget that tomorrow's the unbirthday party. You don't want to be late."
Yeah you're have to go. Mr. Stickler-for-the-Rules Rosehearts wants you to attend so that he can keep an eye on you. Also you should probably go to make sure Ace doesn't fuck it up and get permanently kicked out.
Still, you aren’t looking forward to seeing that red tyrant in all his glory. But when the price to pay is having Ace living in your dorm until you graduate, you have to do it regardless.
"Yu, can I crash with you again? It doesn’t look like I'll be allowed in my own dorm tonight."
"It's not really like I can say no..." You murmur, which is true because you're afraid if angering him, but Deuce and Grim actually come to your aid.
"It isn't right to keep mooching off of ______, Ace."
"Yeah, it ain't! If you wanna stay tonight, you gotta pay for the privilege! Ten cans of tuna!"
"What? Guess I'm sleeping outside, then." That's all it took? Really?
"Why don't you go and stay at Yu's dorm," Well, that was a given. Thanks Trey, you didn't expect him to open his big fat mouth, especially after all the kindness he spared you and you in turn, thought you at least buttered him up," -too, Deuce, so you can keep an eye on him?" What.
Great, now you have two people. Two unwanted guests in your dorm, fan-fucking-tastic. That's two people wondering your dorms halls, and sneaking around.
"What fun for you. Ooh, maybe I'll come too!" Aw fuck no. Two was already overcrowding, three was way too many. "What do you say, Yu?" How about, fuck no Cater. You already going have two loose cannons roaming in your dorm, you don't need third.
Trey says what you can't for you much too your relief. "No pass for you." Thank you Trey, even if he did unintentionally, or intentionally since you don't know his motivations, hang you out to dry, that kept on liability to your freedom off your back. "Sorry to dump them all on you, _____. At least it's just for tonight."
"It's no problem." It's very much a problem, but you can't do anything about it. "See you tomorrow."
Till tomorrow, just a little longer it seems.
Just a little longer.
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You were exhausted as soon as you went back to Ramshackle.
Having two yanderes in your house was two way too many, but with the day's exhaustion staring you directly in to the face. Half a night of sleep mixed with too much exercise, too much work, too much spent adrenaline, and too many emotions running high is a exhausting combination. And when it finally set in, you could barely keep you eyes open long enough to walk back to Ramshackle. So you were scooped up by Deuce, after a three minute argument between Ace and Deuce, and carried the rest of the way.
The way back to Ramshackle is uneventful, save for Grim's 'demands' for what he wanted for dinner now that the extra tart from earlier was well buried in his belly.
After feeding Grim like the cat he wasn't, you barely had the energy and strength to keep your eyes home as you made dinner. Thank the seven that instant noodles exist here. You didn't really want to cook for your two unexpected guests, but you just want to go to bed. The sooner, the better.
You also tuned out whatever conversation Ace and Deuce were having as you all ate in the lounge, way too tired to actively listen to it. If they asked you anything, you couldn't really remember what they said, you'll worry about that tomorrow.
Speaking of tomorrow, Ace and Deuce hopefully wouldn't bother you tonight, everyone's tired because of today so all you can hope for is that you had a peaceful night tonight.
But that didn't happen, because it's happened again.
Or it's better to say that that strange dream is happening again.
You remember drifting off in the warmth of your scratchy sheets, exhausted from the days events. Only to wake up just like you did last night. With that floaty feeling, making you feel like you were flying in the air and swimming in mud at the same time.
Unnerved, you throw off the covers to escape that uncomfortable feeling. But when you reach out to feel the blankets, you don't feel the scratchy fabric against your palm. Or the lumps of the old springs in the mattress or the warmth of Grim's sleeping body.
You place a hand of his fur but reel back in confusion when you don’t feel the softness of fur or the warmth of the flames on his ears.
"This is....it's a dream, right?" You ask to no one in particular. You get only silence in reply.
But like last time, the mirror glows its pale white light. It calls to you, it beckons you.
So are your dreams trying to show you something, like last time. It had told you about the painting the roses, and you did meet the three of clovers today. So maybe it's trying to warn you of something, something destined to happen tomorrow.
Well, the only way you'll be able to find out is if you try the mirror.
"Do you want me to go through?" You ask, and surprisingly, the mirror ripples in response.
Hesitant, you place your palm on the front of the mirror and, much more gently this time, it pulls you through.
Like last time, you're blinded by a too bright white light, and then you're on soft grass.
The world looks like a more animated version of Heartslabyul now, and you're stuck in what has to be the center of the rose maze.
You turn around, and the mirror that transported you is half buried among the surrounding hedges, showing your bedroom on the other side, just like last time.
But unlike last time, there's no one here.
The greyscale hedge maze is full of half and fully red roses, but there is no one here. Strange.
There are no card soldiers, no Alice and no Queen of Hearts, just en empty wonderland-
You freeze as you feel something hit your foot. You look down and-
He's tiny. That's not even an insult. The little guy is so tiny that you could have stepped on him if you weren't paying attention. He's dressed in a red cloak and has a proportionally tiny crown. And he's desperate pulling on your pants leg to drag you back to otherside of your mirror.
"You're the King of Hearts..." You realise, and the tiny king lets go of you, eyes widening at your recognition.
And then he goes back to yanking you back with all his force. Which isn't much, and he falls over twice in his attempts.
"Hey, wait a second. Why are you pulling me back." Is he trying to make you leave, but the mirror wanted to you come back here for something so could you even leave?
The Red King mimes something rapidly in panic, but he doesn’t say a word. Is he mute?
"Calm down." You object, reaching out to do.....whatever was needed to soothe him. Sure, he's small enough to pick up in your hand, but it's obvious that he's concerned about you. Maybe this has to-
You're cut off mid thought as soon as you wrap your hand around him, another light burst out even more blinding than the first, and you feel the tiny body and fabric in your grasp grow so rapidly, it's almost likely it was magic.
Which is because this is a dream.
You wipe the blinding light lingering in your eyes away with a groan, just as a pair of hands, this time normal sized, grab you by your wrists and pull you in the direction of the mirror.
<You need to leave!> The person sounds so desperate as he pulls you, <If she finds you, she's going to cut off your head! I'm just trying to help you!> You lurch forward as you struggle to blink away the remnants of the flash in your eyes.
You're thrown forward against something. It's hard, cold, and smooth to the touch. You try to pull away from the hard surface, but as soon as you rear back two hands on your back, push you forward. And then your vision finally clears.
<B-But I just saw you- I-It was fine a minute ago.>
What you landed upon is the mirror leading back to your room. From here, you can see Grim dozing away in your bed. The mirror had hardened as if stopping you from leaving till you've accomplished what it sent you to do.
But from this angle, a glare of stray light also hits the cold glass. Because in that's reflection, you can see a face that's all to familiar and at the same time not at all.
The person pushing you is dressed in a royal grabe, colored red, black, and gold, and it's covered with heart motifs. From his shirt to the crimson red jacket on his shoulders, from his buttons to the choker on his neck, tiny red hearts cover his clothing. He's still wearing a red cloak, but now it hangs as a cape rather than serving as his whole outfit. He's a little on the shorter side, about Riddle’s height but slightly taller.
And he looks panicked. No, panicked is an understatement. He looks like he's going to have anxiety attack followed by a mental breakdown.
He's stepped back to think ,or rather grasp helplessly at his ginger hair in abject horror. He's close the actually pulling it out, too. Surprisingly, the crown on his head has managed to stay put despite his frenzied pulling.
He's spiraling into a dark abyss of frenzied muttering. <What am I going to do!? She's going to cut off her head, and then the guards' heads and then my head, and everyone's heads!> Is that what you sound like when you're spiraling? Because he looks and sounds like he's on his last nerve and that nerve is fraying very fast.
Wait.
"Hey.....hey!" You manage to intervene somewhere between his ramblings of heads, and he shuts up as soon as you raise your voice.
<Y-Y-Yes?> He looks at you in fear, as if expecting you to be angry. If your theory is right, then, you can't help but feel sorry for him.
"You are the King of Hearts, darling of the Queen of Hearts?"
You hate the way your stomach sinks when he nods.
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enhaheeseung · 1 year ago
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Here to stay - L. Heeseung
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Pairing: heeseung X fem reader!
Warning: mentions of sex, angst, heartbreak, fluff, crying.
Genre: fuck buddies, smut, mdni!
WC: 2,881k maybe a little more
Continuation of “Come & Go”
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It's been one month since heeseung blocked you.
One whole month.
It was weird not hearing from you. It felt even more weird not getting up at two in the morning to run to your place and pleasure you.
Because he had cut all ties with you, he was sleeping earlier these days, but funny enough. His body was still waking him up at 2 in the morning, the time you'd usually call for him.
He felt pathetic cause his body was betraying his willpower to move on from you. Even if he was fighting for his mind to be occupied elsewhere, his heart still ached for you.
He was currently lying in bed, his phone clutched in his hand tightly, thumb itching to unblock your number.
"Fuck” he curses out loud and shuts his phone off, trying his best to respect the deal he made with Jay and ultimately trying to get over you, but it was so damn hard.
After nearly a year of being with you, it felt impossible to forget you. It felt impossible to move on with his life and find someone who would respect and love him for who he is and not just his body.
But fuck if he had to choose between you and true love, he's definitely picking you. Yeah, it hurt to be cast aside after being used by you, but it hurt so good that he'd always go back for more and more until you finally had your way and were done with him.
"Laying in bed all day isn't going to help" Jay opens his bedroom door without even knocking.
"Yeah, I kinda figured that out after the first week." heeseung rolls his eyes and sits up against his bed frame.
"The guys and I are going out. Do you want to come?" Jay fiddles with the lock on the doorknob.
"I'll pass." heeseung runs his fingers through his messy hair, sighing deeply.
"Well, the guys were hoping you could come so…" Jay murmurs.
"I'll make it up to all of you later. I still just need some time," Jay nods in understanding.
"Take your time." Jay slowly backs out of heeseung's room and closes the door silently.
"I just need some time," Heeseung quietly repeats to convince himself that all he needs is time, but even when he says it out loud, something in the pit of his stomach just doesn't feel right.
-
You sighed as you sat down at your desk at work, completely stressed out of your mind.
You could already tell you were going to have a headache when you got home tonight cause today has been nothing but a shit day.
It's one of those days where, just a month ago, you'd already be planning to call heeseung over so he could work his magic on your body and take all your stress away.
But no, because he blocked you cause he wanted more from you, and when he saw he wasn't getting it, he knew when to walk away.
You hate how you took him for granted. He was a great guy, amazing at sex and even better at cuddling you, and he also wasn't shy about making his like for you known.
You were just a piece of shit that disregarded him as a person with feelings and only saw him for what he could give to you, which was mind-blowing sex.
If you could have a do-over, then you surely would, one where you confessed to him and realized your feelings for him a whole hell of a lot sooner.
But you let your fear of being lied to and cheated on get in the way of your true happiness.
But could you even be blamed? Every man you were with did that to you, hence why you gave up on relationships and only had sexual transactions now.
But even you have to admit that Lee heeseung wasn't like Every Man. unfortunately, it took you too long to figure that out, and now here you are, heartbroken again because you let the past ruin your future. You did your best to stop that from happening and it still wasn't enough.
At least now a great guy like him could find someone who cared about him and loved him the way he deserved instead of someone like you who hid your feelings and was only going to confess after a whole year of practically using his body.
It hurt, but you hope he's happy with someone that's his equal and not a total piece of shit like you.
Who are you kidding?
It's not that simple; you wish it was, but you were going to be feeling this pain for days, if not months. Yeah, it was selfish of you to still want him around even after you played with his feelings for years, but it couldn't be helped.
If only you could have realized that he was worth taking a chance on months ago, maybe he'd be your boyfriend, maybe you'd be living together, maybe you'd be married and planning to have a family and live happily ever after.
The thought brings tears to your eyes, so you push your fairytale ideas to the side, focusing back on work before all your co-workers notice you shedding a few tears.
-
Another week had gone by, and heeseung felt the same. He knows they say it takes three months to get over someone, but how could he stay away from you that long? It was impossible, and that's why he's sneaking out of his and Jay's shared apartment to go to your place; being away from you was killing him inside. Even if you'd only use his body for sex and kick him out, it was still better than not being able to see or touch you at all.
He arrived some odd minutes later and jogged up the stairs to your building, heart racing in his chest, and he just hoped you wouldn't turn him away. He hopes you still at least just want him for sex. That'd be enough for him. Just knowing that you wanted something from him would be enough. He knows it's pathetic. He knows he deserves better, but he wants you, and he doesn't care if that makes him a loser. All he cares about is you.
The clock had just hit 2 in the morning, and you didn't know why you were holding your phone as if you could call him still, but you were. Maybe it was muscle memory, or maybe it was the only thing holding your emotions in check.
You laughed at yourself pathetically, but deep down, a part of you felt like you deserved this pain, and with that thought, you set your phone aside as the silence crept up on you, and instead of wallowing in self pity you were just going to go to sleep and wait for tomorrow so you could feel all these emotions again just this time it'd be a new time and a new date.
The knock on your door stops you in your tracks on your way to your bedroom you shake your head in disbelief because now you were even hallucinating the familiar sound of his knock.
You continued to walk to your bedroom until you heard it again and again, and there was no way that was just a hallucination, especially when the knocks became more frequent.
Heeseung was relentless outside your door. He wasn't going to stop until you let him in. He's sure you probably saw him outside the peephole by now, and he's not sure if you still even care to answer since he was the one who blocked you but fuck it, he was here now, and he wasn't taking no for an answer he needed you, and he needed you tonight.
He heard a soft click, the same one he always heard when you unlocked the door for him. His knocks came to a halt when he saw a faint light peaking through the crack of your door, and within a second, he stepped inside and slammed the door shut behind him, closing any type of personal space you once had. "Heeseun-" he doesn't even let you speak before he's jumping your bones, hands squeezing your waist as his lips met yours in a rushed kiss.
"Sorry I blocked you," he breathes out against your lips, still holding you tightly so you can't slip through his fingers. "Sorry I stopped coming, sorry I didn't answer," you moan into the kiss, hands strongly gripping his shoulders as you try to grasp what's happening.
You were shocked to see him, but you couldn't comprehend anything before you were making out with him, and right now, nothing else mattered but your lips working in perfect sync with each others.
"It was my friend's idea" he started trailing kisses down your neck, his large veiny hands cupping your tits roughly, causing you to arch your back and press yourself closer to him. "Said I should stop seeing you." he nibbled the skin of your neck as you moaned quietly. "But I couldn't. No matter how much you use me, I still want you," he whispers in your ear, his hot breath leaving a tingle running down your spine.
"Wait," you tell him breathlessly and push his shoulders, creating some distance between the two of you.
"Can't." he steps closer, lips pressing roughly against yours until you push him back again. "Please, I'll do anything. Please, just don't kick me out," he begs in a whiny voice. "I don't care if you only want me for sex. As long as you want me, that's enough."
"Heeseu-" he leans into you, his voice wobbly as he says the words he's been wanting to say for what feels like forever.
"I love you." he presses his face against your neck, inhaling your scent as his arms naturally wrap around you.
You hear him sniffle softly, and your heart breaks because none of what he was saying was how you felt, maybe in the very beginning, but definitely not now. "Hey," you cup his cheeks, making him look up at you, his watery eyes boring into your own. "I don't just want you for sex, okay, you're so much more than that, and I can't believe I'm saying this cause I never thought I'd utter the words again but fuck heeseung, I love you too. I love you so much," you whisper, hands running along his neck soothingly.
That's it. Lee heeseung had finally broken all your walls and infiltrated your heart. You thought they were impenetrable, but it turns out all you needed was someone who actually truly cared about you and not someone who was just using you for their own satisfaction.
He looks back and forth between your eyes, obviously confused by your words, and you laugh lightly because of his cute expression. "You don't have to say that just because I di-" You shut him up with one long-awaited meaningful kiss.
He was beyond happy to hear you saying those words to him, but this couldn't be real, could it? He must still be back at his apartment, dreaming of this moment that he had dreamt of a million times.
But your next words proved otherwise. "I know it's sudden, baby, I know, but I love you," You peck his cute pouted lips. "I just couldn't bring myself to tell you how I truly felt. I've been hurt so many times in the past, and I was just scared to move on with you, but I should have seen you were different from the start. I should have never strung you along and played with your feelings. I'm so sorry for everything, and I'm just so happy you're here now, and I can tell you how much you mean to me. You're so perfect, Lee Heeseung," you told him sincerely while stroking his soft cheek with your thumb, eyes full of nothing but love. "And I would be the luckiest girl on the planet to have all your love, and if you're willing to give me another chance, I want to give that same love back to you."
He's grinning from ear to ear, elated by the three words you just confessed to him.
He expected this to go so much differently than it has, but he wouldn't want it any other way. He can't believe you loved him back, like you actually felt the same way for him as he felt about you, and that was absolutely mind-blowing. And now that he thinks about it, he needs to have more than just a few words with Jay, but that could wait till later. Right now, he's gonna enjoy this surreal moment with you, the love of his life.
"Can you say all that again? You lost me at I love you," he chuckles, squeezing you in his arms tightly.
You giggle while nodding and repeating every single thing you said, and he listens very, very intently, his eyes sparkling as he looks at you with so much love.
"So maybe you can prove it to me in your room on your bed. How does that sound?" He scrunched his face up, laughing softly as you nodded your head shyly. "Yeah?" He grins.
"Yeah, I'll prove that and so much more, my love," you whisper seductively, and he visibly goes red, causing you to bite down on your lip to hold back your smile, and you can't help but think he looks so good all shy like that.
How did you ever get so lucky for him to give you another chance?
"God, I'm so happy," he sighs dreamily, staring at you with nothing but pure love in his eyes, and you felt so full knowing that he cared about you so much and was never shy to express it.
He picks you up in his arms, carrying you to bed. "I love you." he pecks the tip of your pretty nose, laying you down gently on your bed and hovering above you. "So much," he adds while leaning down and connecting your lips with his.
"I love you more." You smile so hard your cheeks start to hurt. "And for the record, you make me happier."
"Hey!" He whines cutely. "You make me the most happy."
And who were you to argue with that? Especially when his soft pink lips were colliding so perfectly with yours.
-
It was the morning after you and heeseung were lying down in bed together, his arm around you while your head rested on his bare chest. "Morning," you whisper, looking out the window and tickling his chest with your fingertips.
"Hmm, morning lovely," he chuckles and wraps his other arm around you. "Love you," he says with his raspy morning voice.
"Love you too." You kissed his chest all over, hearing him giggle from below you.
It's funny how it had been years since you said those words to a love interest, but with him, it just came so naturally, like you had been saying it for years.
"I gotta make it up to you, hee," you pout, tracing the faint line between his pecs.
"No baby, this is enough. Just you and me here now is all that matters," he assures you, but that's not good enough. He deserves the world.
"I know, but I want to do something for you," you tell him seriously.
"You don't take no for an answer, hmm?" He smiles.
"Not this time," you say matter-of-factly.
"Tell me what you want to do for me, baby. You were already amazing last night; I don't know what more I could ask for." You blush, hearing his words and feeling little butterflies erupt in your stomach. No one has ever talked to you as sweetly as he has. "Plus, you told me your side, and I understand it's hard, but I promise you I'll treat you right love, be the man you deserve."
"Oh, hee." You looked up at him, and your eyes started to water.
"It's only what you deserve" he taps your nose, making you smile, and now you want to give this man the whole world.
"That's it get ready," you tell him and hop off the bed. You were going to take him anywhere he wanted, buy him whatever he wanted, wine, and dine him the whole nine yards. Whatever he wanted, it was his, no questions asked.
"Okay, baby, but first, come take a picture with me so I can send it to Jay." You hop back in bed and take a cute picture of you both hiding under the sheets, with only your eye smile showing he sent it. Caption it: my girlfriend and me.
"Girlfriend?" You ask him.
"Don't act surprised. You know it was coming sooner or later," he laughs.
"Boyfriend!" You cheer after a few moments of letting this set in and tackle him in the biggest hug ever.
"I like the sound of that. Say it again, baby." you both smile, looking at each other completely lovestruck.
Heartbreak comes and goes, but this love is here to stay.
[END]
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Thanks so much for reading! Please leave feedback. I love you all and hope you enjoyed it since everyone was asking for a lot.2 lol🖤
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