#I haven't really been watching so no tag I'm afraid

[firebirdsdaughter]

My entire understanding of KingOhger remains:

[mayrose713]

Beautifully Cruel World-Chapter 7

Series Masterlist | Previous | Next

ABO Non-Idol Stray Kids Universe Poly OT8 x Reader 18+ MDNI

Warnings in the Series Masterlist as well as any other information needed

I'm sorry for anyone on my tag list who haven't been getting the notifications that I posted. I'm not sure what the problem is or why it's doing that. If anyone knows how to fix it please let me know.

Enjoy this chapter

Chapter 7

A storm rages outside, thunder booming, causing the house to shake each time. Y/n doesn’t have curtains in her room so every flash of lightning lights up the room causing the omega to toss and turn unable to sleep. 

With a huff she looks at the clock on the nightstand to see it’s about three in the morning when another loud clash of thunder shakes the house once again causing her to sit up, shaking a bit in fear. She wonders if anyone else is up because of the storm or if she’s the only one. 

The alphas told her if she ever needed anything at night to just go to their room and Felix said if she wants to cuddle but she feels silly going to one of them because of a storm. She’s not afraid necessarily but she just doesn’t like how the thunder shakes the house and the sound of rain that normally soothes people irritates her. 

With a sigh she gets up deciding that she’ll go downstairs and maybe watch tv in the living room or game room to keep her occupied and distracted. Walking past everyone else’s rooms as quietly as possible she makes it down stairs stopping in the kitchen first to grab a glass of water. After gulping down most of it, setting it down on the counter, thunder boomed causing her to jump and the kitchen light turned on. 

“What are you doing up?” Chan walks in having been the one to turn the light on after seeing her jump from the thunder. 

“Sorry, did I wake you?” 

The alpha shakes his head no. “I’m a light sleeper, anyone walking past my room I hear. Are you okay?”

“Yeah.” Y/n leans against the counter. “Just  having trouble sleeping, I don't really like storms.” 

Thundering crashing causes her to tense up. 

“Why didn’t you come to one of us?” 

Y/n blushes feeling embarrassed. “I felt it was silly to need comfort just because of a storm”

“We get it, Felix doesn’t like storms either.” He tries to help her feel better. “Pretty sure I heard him go to Hyun’s room when the storm first started.” 

“Oh.” She now feels stupid for thinking it was silly.

“Baby girl, we’re here if you need anything, even if it’s something as small as needing to be with someone during a storm.” He moves to her and pulls her to him. “Why don’t we head to my room? You can sleep in my bed.”

“You really don’t have to do that.” Y/n protests. “I’ll be okay.”

“You’re a real stubborn omega.” Chan huffs, gently grabbing her around the waist, throwing her over his shoulder making her squeal a little and walks up stairs after turning the kitchen light back off. “You’re not getting a choice in this.” 

Y/n huffs accepting her fate letting him take her to his room, pulling the blankets back and placing her in the bed tucking her in. 

“I normally sleep without a shirt, is that okay?” He asks hovering over her. “If not I can sleep with it on tonight, I don’t mind.” 

“It’s okay.” The omega whispers. “I want you to be comfortable too.” 

He smiles down at her before taking his shirt off causing her to blush as she sees how muscular he is. She turns away as he climbs in the bed next to her getting situated. 

“Is this okay?” He checks in on her since she’s turned away. When she hums a yes he smirks before wrapping an arm around her and pulls her so her back is against his chest. “What about this?” 

“This is fine.” She mumbles, glad he can’t see her as she’s blushing so hard right now. 

“Good.” Chan hums snuggling her closer to him if that was even possible and kisses the top of her head. “Goodnight baby girl.”

“Goodnight Channie.” 

The next morning Y/n wakes up alone in Chan's bed with a headache. She heads downstairs to find anyone. 

“Where is everyone?” She asks Jisung as she walks in the kitchen.

“Chan and Changbin had to go into the office one last time this week. They normally don’t have to go in more than once a week but because of your dry heat starting tomorrow or the day after they decided to head up there to make sure everything is good since we don’t know how long it could last.” He starts to explain. “Minho had one of his advanced dance classes today as well as a one on one so he’ll be back in a little bit. Felix went with Hyunjin to teach his art class at the community center in town. Seungmin is around here somewhere and Jeongin is in the home gym.”

The omega nods but quickly regrets it as it makes her head hurt worse.

“Are you okay?” 

“Have a headache.” She whimpers, placing a hand against her temple. “Didn’t really sleep well last night because of the storm.”

“Oh, you don’t like storms either like Felix?” He hums in understanding and grabs her arm leading her to the living room. “Why don’t you lay down on the couch for a bit? I’ll get you a glass of water. I’m about to go take a walk around the property anyways so it’ll be quiet down here for a bit. I’ll tell Jeongin and Seungmin to keep it down too.” 

“Thanks Ji.” She smiles, laying down on the couch as he places a blanket over her. 

He brings her a big cup of ice water placing it on the coffee table as well as places the house phone with it. 

“If you need anything my cell is speed dial five. Jeongin’s is eight but he’s got music playing in the gym so he might not hear his phone ringing.”

She gives him a weak smile before he leaves through the back door making sure his ringer is turned up all the way in case she calls. 

⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾ ⋆⁺₊⋆

Seungmin sits in his room strumming his guitar, a little annoyed after Jisung had messaged him saying to keep it down because the stupid omega has a headache. He’s really getting irritated with her presence and doesn't understand how almost all of his other mates are accepting of her. He’s just glad he has Hyunjin on his side. 

Needing to get his anger and frustration out he decides to head out to the batting cages Chan had set up for him in the field in the back near the shed. But that all changes when he walks out of his room and smells a distressed scent and his beta starts telling him that his fated mate is in pain. 

He runs downstairs as quickly as possible, scared it might be Jeongin as he knows he’s been in the gym and remembers how Jisung once had to save Changbin when he was being crushed by weights. What he wasn’t expecting though was to find the omega in the living room, writhing in pain as she clutches her lower stomach, moaning and whimpering in pain. And he realizes it’s her his beta is telling him is in pain.

“Fuck, fuck.” Seungmin runs over realizing her dry heat has started sooner than the others had expected and now that the suppressants have worn off he can fully smell her and his beta is telling him that she is in fact his fated mate. 

“Hey, hey, it’s okay, I’m here.” He shushes her while rubbing her beck, trying to put out calming pheromones but she’s in too much pain for it to help. “I’m going to move you to the den, okay?” 

He picks her up and realizes just how light she is as he carries her to the den and settles her into the nest. He grabs one of the heating pads Minho bought, placing it where she’s clutching. She’s sweating and is hurting and he doesn’t know what to do. 

He brushes her hair out of her face to see if she’d look at him but it’s as if she’s not aware of anything around her. 

“Fuck.” He growls, pulling his phone out and dials Chan's number. 

“Hey Minnie, miss us already?” The alpha tries to joke. 

“It’s Y/n.” Seungmin pants knowing he can hear the fear in his voice. “She started her dry heat. I don’t know what to do. She’s whimpering in pain and clutching her abdomen. I moved her to the den and gave her the heating pad but she’s sweating and doesn’t seem to be aware of anything right now.”

“Fuck.” Chan groans then says something to someone else in the background. “Alright, Changbin and I are leaving now, we’ll be home as soon as we can. Where’s Innie and Ji?”

“Umm, Ji went out on his daily calming walk and Innies in the gym, but I’m too afraid to leave her alone.” Seungmin is frantic as he looks around. “I don’t know how to help her hyung.” He whimpers. “I know now, I know she’s our fated mate and I’ve been such a dick.”

“Listen to me, Seungmin, she’s going to need you right now.” Chan speaks slowly. “She shouldn’t be alone, it can cause separation anxiety. I’ll call Innie so he can get done and shower and will take over for you if you want or will just come and help you. As well as Ji. For the meantime just lay with her in the nest, keep the heating pad on her. Try and keep your scent calm, you might need to scent her if you’re okay with doing that. If she seems to get too feverious call me back. I’ll call Felix, Hyunjin and Minho and tell them what’s going on so you don’t have to worry about it. We’ll be there as soon as we can.”

“Okay Channie.” Seungmin takes a deep breath. “I’m really sorry for how I’ve been acting and treating her.”

“It’s okay Minnie. I know you were upset about all of this, it’s okay.” Chan reassures the beta. “Just be there for her now okay? She’ll forgive you for everything, I know she will.” 

“Thanks hyung.” He sighs. “I’ll see you guys soon.”

“See you soon baby.” 

Seungmin hangs up and tries to stay calm for the omega as he curls up behind her, wrapping an arm around her abdomen to hold the heating pad to her. His other hand plays with her hair as he tries to soothe her. He decided on singing to her hoping it’ll keep her calm. Her moans and whines of pain start to lessen as she relaxes against him a bit, her eyes stay closed though. 

“If you can hear me Y/n, tap my hand.” He whispers and she taps his hand lightly. “Good girl. I know you’re in a lot of pain right now but I’m right here. The hyungs and Innie will be here soon too. But I’m not going anywhere, I promise.” 

“How is she?” Jeongin steps into the doorway, still sweaty from working out. 

“In pain but she’s calmed down a bit now.” The beta explains.

The youngest nods in understanding, setting a glass of water down next to the nest before moving to the windows closing the curtains so the sun isn’t shining into the den. “Make sure to keep her hydrated. I’m gonna pull the curtains on the glass doors and close them, hopefully the lack of light will help with her headache as well as closing off the den will keep any loud noises from the others when they get back from disturbing her.”

“Good idea Innie.” 

“I’m gonna go shower. Jisung should be back soon.” The alpha watches them for a moment. “If you want we can take over for you when we’re back, or we can just join you guys.”

“I’ve been keeping a distance long enough.” Seungmin grunts. “I’m not going anywhere.” 

Jeongin smiles at him. “Alright hyung, I’ll be back.” 

“You need to drink some water. Can you sit up for me?” Seungmin looks down at the omega who groans. “I know pup but you need to stay hydrated.”

He helps her sit up, leaning heavily against his chest, groaning and whimpering with every movement as he brings the cup to her lips helping her drink.

“Minho said she should take these. They should help with her headache and cramping. ” Jisung walks in with the two pill tablets and hands them to Seungmin to help her take them. “He’s having to go pick up Felix from the community center because Hyunjin is being an ass and won’t drive him back.”

Seungmin rolls his eyes but then reminds himself that he was acting the same way the last few days. But he tries not to think too heavily on that as he makes sure Y/n takes the tablets.

After he made sure she drank a good amount of water he settles her back down as Jisung refills the cup before crawling into the nest as well. 

“I’m here Y/nnie.”

“Ji.” She whimpers but cuddles closer to both betas and they both scent her to help ease everything.

“Move over.” Jeongin walks in. “Let me have her.”

The two betas don’t want to but know that the alpha must be going crazy internally having the need to protect her. They make room for him but stay as close as they can not willing to leave her at all. 

“Alpha.” Y/n whimpers.

“I’m here omega.” Jeongin coos petting her head. “I’m here, you're safe.”

The three of them stay like that with her for a while until Chan and Changbin get home, rushing into the den. They pause when they see the betas and alpha snuggled up to her. She’s still clutching a heating pad to her abdomen and her face scrunches up occasionally in pain but for the most part she seems okay. 

“Hi hyungs.” Jeongin whispers, giving them a small smile.

“Hi baby.” Chan smiles back. “You pups did really good taking care of your omega. I’m proud of you guys.” 

When Y/n whimpers again Chan walks over and kneels next to the nest placing a hand on her cheek.

“Hey baby girl.” He whispers, she leans into his hand and opens her eyes a little. 

“She doesn't seem to be as hazy as she was when I first found her.” Seungmin mentions seeing that she’s more aware now. 

“You guys being with her probably helped a lot.” Changbin explains watching the omega. 

“We made sure she drank water and everything but she hasn’t eaten yet.” Jisung speaks up. 

“Where is she?” Felix runs through the house and into the den, but gets stopped by Changbin real quickly.

“Calm down.” He holds the younger one in his arms. “You don’t want to overwhelm her with your emotions.” 

Felix pouts but nods as he takes a few deep breaths relaxing in the alphas arms.

“Alright, everyone out.” Minho walks in with the paper bag from the doctors as well as some of Y/n’s new comfy clothes.

“But…”

“Out.” Minho interrupts Felix’s protests. “I need to make sure she gets her medicine and I’m going to help her change, so everyone get out. You can cuddle with her after I’m done.”

Changbin picks up Felix to make the omega leave as Minho walks over and switches spots with the three in the nest to help take her weight and hold her up. 

“Where’s Hyunjin?” Chan asks, still kneeling next to the nest.

“Wouldn’t leave the community center.” Minho sighs. “I told him if he’s going to be an asshole then don't bother coming home.” 

“I’ll call him while you do this, try and talk some sense into him.” Chan rubs the bridge of his nose and stands up.

“Good luck with that, he yelled at Lix and made him cry.” 

Chan growls and pulls his phone out of his pocket.

“Where’s your head at, kitten?” Minho asks once everyone left the den. 

“It hurts, Min.” She whines as he lifts her shirt up over her head. 

“I know baby, but let me do this real quick then you can snuggle with Felix.” He starts to rub the cream on her side then moves to her arm.

He makes her take her antibiotic then slips her new shirt on her before helping her change from sweatpants to sleep shorts. He lays her down, placing the heating pad back on her abdomen.

“Alpha.” She whines and he moves closer to her.

“I’m right here kitten, I’m not going anywhere.” He scents her, keeping her close for a moment enjoying the time alone with her. “Alright, she’s good.” 

Minho knew that Changbin and Felix were standing right outside the door and would hear him and laughs a little when Felix bolts in and crawls into the nest as quickly as possible while still being gentle and snuggles up to the younger omega. 

“Channie hyungs making her a snack while he yells at Hyunjin on the phone.” Felix tells the alpha still upset at the oldest beta for refusing to take him home and yelling at him.

“Are you okay baby.” Changbin asks Felix, joining them in the nest. 

“I am now that I’m here.” He whispers curled up with Y/n. 

The two alphas smile down at their omegas as they hope Y/n’s dry heat goes by quickly.

Tag list: @pixie0627 @sinfulfic @estella-novella @mbioooo0000 @ms-flowergirl @blindspot143 @ihrtlix @arishoriasims @fic-for-readers @motheraiya55 @hwangrfrnd @lxvxchxrlxttxbxrsx22-blog @juskz @borahae-reads @dreamerwasfound @galaxy4489 @kayleefriedchicken @lostgirlinthewoodss @catkight#stray

[niki-phoria]

https://www.tumblr.com/niki-phoria/776310441091694592/hii-lovely-do-you-still-write-for-chishiya

hii, it’s me again!

If I’m not bothering you, you wrote to Chishiya "his types of kiss", do you think you could write a "his kind of demonstrating that he cares through gestures" (gn reader)? Thank you so much 🩷

그런 널 보면 i'm dyin' to hold you now / 밤은 또 어느새 날 깨우려 하는데

pairing: chishiya shuntaro x gn!reader (no pronouns used) genre: fluff word count: 580

notes: wasn't sure how i wanted to write this so it isn't super romance focused (chishiya's love languages is similar but more romantic), haven't written for aib in a while so sorry if the game doesn't really make sense lol, thank you so much for the request !! i hope you like it <33, not proofread !! pls forgive any mistakes, title from bae173 - annoyed

the air feels sticky against your skin; the night breeze does little to combat against the humid summer air. beside you, aguni crosses his arms across his chest. he lets out an impatient sigh as he leans his head against a white pillar. your eyes scan around the group. your competition. 

a businessman nervously fidgets with the cuffs of his suit. beside him, two women stand side by side, clinging onto each other. they whisper softly to each other even though you’re too far away to hear any of their words.

CHISHIYA SHUNTARO nods his head along to a rhythm you can’t hear. his hood has been pulled up over his head, leaving only a few stray strands of blonde hair visible beneath the night sky. when chishiya glances upwards, his gaze meets your own. he smirks softly behind his jacket hood for a few seconds before returning to silently analyzing the other players. 

the chime of the announcement system comes as a welcome change. a familiar automated voice plays over speakers you can’t see. “game: tag.”

at first, the minutes tick by without any events. you keep your footsteps quiet as you slip through the stairwell. aguni walks with confidence but you don’t miss the way he subtly sticks closer to the shadows lining the walls. you take the opportunity to slip away, walking through the eerily empty apartment’s halls. 

chishiya is already standing near the roof when you arrive. without the jacket’s hood protecting his face, the wind blows stray strands of blonde hair across his face. he leans against the white half-wall, watching the other players wander around from above. 

“anything interesting?” you ask, stepping closer to stand beside him. the bricks feel cool against your hands. a thick layer of paint has smoothed out any texture they used to have. 

chishiya simply hums. “nothing yet.” he shifts slightly, brushing his shoulder against your own. it’s an otherwise unnoticeable gesture, but it makes your heart skip a beat nonetheless. “does aguni know you’re here?”

you shrug. as the beach grew, it became harder to keep track of each member individually. the games only added to your anonymity, making it easy to slip away from the crowd under the guise of ‘being afraid for your life.’ “does it matter?” 

he remains silent. your lives depended on your social skills just as much as your physicality. the beach had only become another challenge, demanding careful navigation and care to survive. aguni was smart enough to survive. he wasn’t vengeful like niragi or observant like ann. he wouldn’t pose any real risk. at least, not while hatter was still in charge. 

chishiya glances at you. he shuffles ever so closer, resting his hand just beside your own. the heat from his knuckles is a welcome change from the otherwise cool night air. after a few seconds his hand dips lower, fingers now tugging at the edge of your beach-issued bracelet. chishiya’s fingers run along the braided thread holding it together. 

you flinch slightly when yet another round of gunshots echo throughout the apartment. they’re much closer now; you can hear the click of another round being loaded into the chamber. chishiya reaches over, tentatively taking your hand into his own. his thumb runs along the grooves of your knuckles. he doesn’t say anything. he doesn’t need to. the gentle circles he rubs against the back of your hand say more than words ever could. don’t worry. we’ll be home soon.

if you enjoyed this fic, please consider leaving a like, comment, feedback, or rebloging !! and if you want to support me, check out my aib masterlist <33

[sshadow-heartz]

HELLO I'm almost new here and I've started reading your writings and the truth is that they have fascinated me 🥺

i really loved them and more about the guards so i would really like more!!!! maybe this time a smut about a circle guard idk 😭 only if you can and want, i haven't read many about them. tysm 💘

Thank you so much, you’re so kind!

After Hours

💕Circle Guard x Player!Reader

💕Written with fem reader in mind

💕Word Count: 1.3k

💕Tags: Smut, Oral, Fingering

• masterlist • c.ai bots •

!!Do not proceed if underage or are sensitive these topics!!

After sneaking into the vents in the bathroom, you had been crawling for what felt like forever. Spotting a vent cover, you look down beneath you. Rows of guards wearing aprons lined up side by side, stirring large pots of what you recognised as dalgona. They worked in unison, stirring, pouring and stamping with varied shapes. Could it be the next game…?

Your studying of the scene down below is interrupted as some dust flows through the vent, causing your throat to itch. You try your best to hold back a cough and stay silent, the irritation proving too much as the sound echoes within the cramped vent. You pause immediately, holding your breath as you look down. You knew if you were caught you’d likely be killed.

A mask with a circle print stares up at you blankly, peering through the vent cover above the pots. Even through a mask, you can tell they’re locking eyes with you. Anxiety builds in your chest, someone knew you were up there…

The other guards continue to work, oblivious to your presence watching over them silently. The sole guard to see you had their attention pulled away, a triangle guard signifying the end of their shift. They exit the kitchen, a line of circle guards hanging up their aprons and filing out of the room. You wait nervously for the last guard to leave, but they simply hang up their apron and look back up at you through the vent.

Just as you’re about to crawl back to the bathroom, you see them wave you down. Arms outstretched, ready for you to land in after you give up and jump down. Pulling back the vent cover, you slip through the opening, falling right into their open arms. They barely move, your weight meaning nothing to their strong physique. Crossing your arms, you make it clear you aren’t afraid of them or what they’ll do. They don’t even have a gun, what’s to fear, right?

The guard looks down at you, shaking their head disapprovingly as they set you down. Placing their hands on their hips, they make a clear show of looking you up and down, noting your features and the curves of your body through your uniform. You had left the thick jacket behind, wearing just the t-shirt and sweatpants to crawl through the vent more easily. You glare up at them, brow furrowed as you watch them stare at you.

“Hey! I’m not afraid of you. What are you gonna do? Tattle on me to a triangle?” You mock, puffing your chest in an attempt to make yourself look scarier. “Yeah, that’s what I thought! You’re just gonna stand there like a… like a wimp!”

The guard watches you yell, listening as you try and think of an insult. You’re adorable. Bratty, but adorable. That attitude just won’t do, you need someone to remind you of your position here…

They step forward, towering above you. Grabbing your shoulders, they spin you around to face the wall, pressing you against it easily. Pulling your hands behind your back, they hold you in place. You feel your cheeks heat up, a blush spreading over your face as you’re manhandled by the tall guard behind you. It felt weirdly good, the hands around your wrists not allowing you to struggle. The attention felt good, even if you were trying to be angry.

Tilting their mask up ever so slightly, they lean over you, large body pressing against your frame. Their head finds your neck, pressing hot kisses against the sensitive skin. Trailing kisses along your jawline, they pull a hand away from your wrists, reaching up your shirt to run over your curves. The warmth of the guard’s body and their wandering hands causing your head to spin, the sensations causing you to shiver.

The guard notices your reactions, seeing you press against their hands, the way your lips part ever so slightly, cheeks dusted with red. They smirk, burying their face in the crook of your neck, sucking and nipping, leaving behind dark marks. Their hands squeeze your breasts softly, fingers pinching your nipples. Your quiet sighs and moans don’t go unnoticed, only fuelling their desire for you further.

Running down your sides, their hands pause at your hips, leaving you reeling in anticipation. Pulling a hand back, they slap your ass hard, chuckling to themselves as you gasp. Looking over your shoulder, you watch as they look down, kicking your legs apart. They tilt their head up towards you, eyes covered, yet their intense gaze causing your legs to go weak.

Pulling down your sweatpants, they let the fabric drop to your feet. You hear them let out an appreciative sigh, hands reaching down to grope your ass. You arch your back, pushing against their large hands. You can feel their gaze taking you in, feeling small under their looming height.

Their fingers hook the sides of your panties, yanking them down. Exposed before them, they waste no time reaching down to rub your aching clit. They hum, amused by how wet you are for them. A quiet moan slips out of you, the touch feeling incredible as you ache for more. Trailing circles around your sensitive flesh, they dip down towards your slit, a finger pushing into you. Your thighs shake ever so slightly, caught up in the pleasure being brought to you.

Pumping their finger slowly, they lean to press a dominating kiss against your lips, their tongue battling against yours. You feel a second finger slip inside of you, your moans swallowed by the kiss. Pulling away to let you catch your breath, they continue to pump their fingers, curling them against the sensitive spot buried within you.

Strings of moans and whispered curses leave your lips, their fingers filling you up so perfectly. They speed up ever so slightly, their pace rough yet still causing you to see stars, eyes barely open as you squirm beneath them.

Feeling you clench around their fingers, they quickly pull away, causing you to whine as your climax is held off. Gripping your jaw with their hand, they bring their fingers up to your mouth, pressing them against your lips. Watching your tongue work against their fingers so desperately pleases them, seeing you act so beautifully submissive.

Pulling away from your mouth, they kneel down between your legs, lips trailing up your thighs. Trailing their tongue around your clit, they tease the sensitive bud, listening to your pathetic moans. Sucking your clit softly, they moan at your taste, the sound vibrating against your sensitive skin. Their tongue trails down towards your soaked slit, trailing the entrance before plunging inside. Moans spill from your lips as they explore your aching heat, only growing louder as their fingers work your clit once again.

Feeling your climax building, you buck your hips, tilting your head back. They only continue, spurring you on and working you ever so perfectly until you reach your finish, moaning loudly as your eyes squeeze shut. You pant heavily, the pleasure taking your breath as you gasp between moans. The guard continues through your climax, only pulling away until you squirm from sensitivity.

Standing up once more, they yank your panties and sweatpants up, patting your ass teasingly. They gesture to the vent, reminding you to get yourself back and cleaned up, knowing you’ve already been gone a while. You feel their smug proudness, having left you a mess, smoothing your hair with shaking hands. Your legs felt so weak, the thought of crawling back through the vent already tiring you out.

They let out an amused hum, giving you a boost up to the vent. Something tells you this won’t be the last time you’re reduced to a moaning mess, beginning to crawl back to the bathroom. Until next time, you suppose…

[satorusluver]

Wanna Bet?

Satosugu x female reader

Minors DNI

Tags/Warnings: smut, threesome sort of, slight breast play, alcohol mention (they're sober tho), princess as a nickname because it's my weakness lol

Word count: 800 ish

A/N: Idek what this is, it was just a scene in my head that's been sitting in my drafts so *throws it at you and runs*

You stare down at the panting mess of your friend Satoru under you. He's sprawled out on the bed, white hair blending in with the pillowcase. His hands are gripping your thighs and his fingertips lightly dig into the soft flesh as you grind back and forth on him, the outer lips of your pussy sliding up and down the length of his hard dick. You've been doing this for a couple of minutes now, never working up the courage to actually put it in. It's clearly getting to Satoru, who looks like he'd be about ready to start begging if his pride would let him, which it won't. But now he's chewing on his lower lip almost hard enough to break the skin, and his icy blue eyes keep rolling back as he gently grinds up against you. The stimulation feels good, but never quite enough.

"I don't know what you're so afraid of, it's not like you're a virgin." You hear the deep voice of Suguru from behind you and feel his large hands ghost over the curve of your waist.

"I-I know...but look at him, he's huge," you stammer, looking to where the fat head of Satoru's cock is peeking out from between your pussy lips.

"He's no bigger than me," Suguru replies smugly, his hands still trailing up your waist until he cups your breasts, and although you can't see his face, you can hear the grin in his voice. "Don't tell me you're too much of a baby to sit on a dick?"

"If you keep talking shit, I'm not gonna let you fuck me after him," you hiss, your hips still slowly moving back and forth on Satoru's length, the friction against your clit causing you to stifle a moan as you try to sound firm.

"You're the one who got drunk the other night and admitted you've always wanted to know what both of our dicks felt like." As he speaks, the pads of Suguru's thumbs tease your nipples until they stiffen under his touch.

God, that was embarrassing of you. But really, who could blame you when you had two of the most attractive men you'd ever seen as your closest friends? It's honestly a miracle it took so many years for you to let your attraction to them slip.

"Well, you guys are the ones who said you wanted to actually let me do it!"

"We did. So why don't you go ahead and actually put it in?" Satoru finally speaks, bucking his hips impatiently. He's trying to keep his cool, but a hint of desperation is creeping into his usually cocky voice.

"He's right, haven't you tortured poor Toru enough? Come on, lift your hips a little. I'll help you since you apparently need it..."

You do as Suguru says, lifting your hips up, and you watch as his hand curls around the base of Satoru's dick so casually you're a little thrown off by it. The lack of any and all hesitation has you silently wondering if he'd done it before, but you don't have much time to think about it before Suguru is lining up the head of Satoru's cock with your entrance, gently moving it back and forth against your slit to get it wet enough to go in with ease.

"Go on then, princess. Or do you need me to hold your hand, too?" Suguru's making fun of you, but he actually does interlace the fingers of his free hand with yours, and his lips brush against your own affectionately.

You groan into Suguru's mouth the moment you finally sink down onto Satoru's cock, and you can feel his lips turn up in a smirk at the sound you make. You take in a sharp breath at the stinging feeling the stretch causes once you feel him bottom out. For a moment, you're silently cursing yourself for ever admitting you wanted to try this, but then your walls begin to adjust to his size and the pain begins to melt away until all that's left is the feeling of being deliciously and utterly full in a way you've never felt before.

"Fuck," Satoru curses, "she's so fuckin' tight."

"Yeahhh?" Suguru drawls, his voice somehow sounding even lower than usual. "You look like you're trying not to blow your load already," he chuckles. Well, at least you're not the only one he's poking fun at.

"I'll last longer than you," Satoru insists, although his teeth are gritted slightly as though he's already struggling with his self-control.

"You wanna bet? We got all night after all, don't we, princess?" You feel Suguru's hot breath just below your ear before he playfully nips at the sensitive skin there, and you brace yourself for what is about to be a very long night.

[deldaydreams]

Mafia au/ Good Luck while running away from the mafia part 1

Intro , part 0.5 , part 2 , part 3 , part 4 , part 5 , part 6

Notes: Guess what I’m back . To be honest I didn’t quite like it but anyway I’m posting it and I can’t write fight scenes (￣▽￣;). It’s so exhausting.

Tags: @loivre , @randomlyappearingartist , @serenity-loves-red , @hasty-desert , @moonlight-nightwing , @hrhqueenfox , @oceanside-pixie

Warning: cursing, fighting, blood, shooting, Yandere stuff…

“Riddle-san, what are you doing, sir?”

At the question, Riddle briefly lifted his eyes from the documents and looked at you.

“I was just wondering about a thing.” He replied.

You looked around at the files arranged in order. All of them had one thing in common: betrayal, crime, wrong, etc. against the organizations punishments .

“I was really curious about what caught Riddle-san's attention. What could possibly make you go through even the files from the old manager Trein-sensei's time?"

Riddle smiled.

"Don't worry, you'll find out soon." said Riddle.

You were suddenly startled by the sound of footsteps. Apparently you fell asleep. You're not normally someone who sleeps a lot, but for the past two weeks you haven't been able to sleep properly.

After leaving the organization or rather escaping, you temporarily settled in a remote coastal city where you hoped they'd find you a little late. With a little help, you changed your identity, your phone line, everything. You've removed everything that indicates Y/n L/n.

Life here was calmer compared to your old life. You wished you could stay here forever. But you knew they would find you eventually. You lived ,one night in your sleep afraid that they would find you at your most vulnerable moment.

You were currently working in a cafe. Although it may seem a little illogical, working at the cafe, which was open until midnight, was actually a little better for you. The more people around you, the easier it is to avoid them.

"Yo!" You turned the way you came. Your colleague Alex was glaring at you with his arms folded.

“Yuu, what are you doing in the camera room again, are you skipping work again?”

'Yuu' is your new identity that you created to make it harder for them to find you while running away. You still had a hard time getting used to the name.

“No, Alex. I just- "

"Anyway, I'm going downstairs. You have the upstairs okay?"

You nodded and Alex left the room. You looked at the clock, it was 10:00 pm. You stretched yourself and yawned. Two more hours until the end of the shift.

As you were about to get up, your eyes were caught by the cameras. Your eyes widened in panic at what you saw. You watched three people enter the cafe. You'll recognize those red hair, those grins, those faces wherever you see them. Heartslabyul found you. No, they all found you. You clenched your teeth, your time was limited.

The reason you spent most of your time in the camera room was because you could see everything from here. You quickly grabbed your gun from the locked drawer and loaded it. Deuce and Cater took a table downstairs near the front exit. Ace was walking up the stairs.

You took a deep breath. You should have thought fast. You should have gotten out of here . But for that you had to go down the stairs first.

You went behind the door and waited. You waited for Ace to find you.

Looking at the cameras. He was approaching. You gripped your gun tightly. And the door opened. You punched the poor boy in the face as the door opened.

“Agh-“ A bitter moan broke out from Ace.

Before he could draw his gun, you kicked him in the stomach and dropped it to the ground.

“Agh- it's been a long time and the first thing you do when you see me is attack me? Really Y/n.” Ace grinned . Clutching his nose, which was bleeding from your punch.

You muttered, "Bastard."

“Come on Y/n didn't you miss me? I missed you so much." He tried to punch you, but you avoided him. You both started to struggle. Ace might have been strong, but you were more experienced and stronger than him. You grabbed him by the head and knocked him to the ground. Before he could regain his balance, you took his tie and tied him with it.

“What am I going to miss about you, you sadistic bastard!”

You picked up the gun on the ground.

“What? Are you going to shoot me ?” Ace said in a tone you didn't like.

“You have to stop asking questions you know the answer to.”

At 11:00 pm, screams broke out in a cafe with the sound of 'bang' gunfire. Everyone in the cafe began to flee desperately, except for two people. The two men, one with red hair and the other with black hair, started to make their way to the upper floor of the cafe.

“Do you think who shot whom, hmm~” Cater asked the younger one.

As the two of them went upstairs, the power went out suddenly and the whole cafe was plunged into darkness.

“Looks like Y/n-chan won.” said Cater to himself.

“Let's separate . You stay here, Y/n has to use the stairs before they can get out of the cafe.” Cater instructed.

“Okay, sir.” said Deuce.

You held your breath under the table. You waited for Cater's footsteps to go away. You were the one who cut the electricity. Five minutes later the generator would start working . You should have gotten out of here by then. Finally, making sure that Cater was far enough away, you slowly came out from under the table. No matter how hard you tried not to make a sound, Deuce heard you.

“Y/n? Is this you ?"

Now that his eyes were accustomed to the dark, he could barely make out your silhouette. Everything happened so abruptly. You took a chair and hit Deuce with it. While he was stunned by the blow, you ran downstairs with your names and the electricity came back. Your five minutes were up.

When the lights were turned on, an unexpected sight was in front of you.

Riddle was sitting at a table eating strawberry pie as if nothing had happened.

“Ah, Y/n you finally came down. I was getting really bored waiting for you.” He said while taking a slice of the pie.

You pointed your gun at him. "Get out of my way if you don't-"

"It's been a long time since we've seen each other, Y/n, but will you put that gun down?" A familiar voice said as you turned around and saw Trey pointing his gun at you. As always, even in this state, he was smiling gently at you.

“Tch. What do you want ? Why are you here?" You asked questions that you know very well the answer to.

Riddle smiled.

“Y/n L/n you are posing a great danger to the organization right now. You also have cases of injuring my men. You understand what I'm trying to say, right?"

"Get out of my way or I'll shoot you."

Riddle laughed.

“You won’t t kill me, you can't. Just like we can't do to you. Now if you drop that gun, I'll do my best to mitigate your sentence."

This was clearly a lie. You grit your teeth. You smiled calmly and did as he said. You slowly put your gun down and raised your hands in the air.

“Well done, here it is. I wish you would always listen to my words like this. Now let's go back." said Riddle.

“Sorry Riddle but I won't be back!” You said and detonated the smoke bomb you were hiding. The area was suddenly covered with fog. You quickly walked out the front door through that mess and got into your car.

“Get them quick!” Riddle shouted.

You quickly drove away. There was no turning back anymore. The Game has started.

[just-my-latest-hyperfixation]

Eddie Munson's royal fuck-up

Written for the @steddieholidaydrabbles, day 11

Prompt: Royalty AU

Rated: G

CW: none

Tags: Rockstar Eddie Munson; Royal Steve Harrington; Meet cute; Flirting; Secret Identity; Sort of angsty/open ending

"So, tommorow…" Chrissy says from behind the folder they've been provided. It looks so posh with its dark green binding, the royal sigil embossed on it in gold print. Eddie hates it. It probably thinks it's so much better than the other folders. "When you're introduced to Prince Steven, you're to address him as Your Royal Highness. After that, you call him Sir." 

"What, really? Dude, at least buy me dinner before we start with the kinky shit." 

Chrissy shoves his feet off the desk, which almost makes him topple off his chair. 

"Can you take this seriously? A royal visit is an important matter. We can certainly use the publicity-" 

Eddie's hand crashes down on the desk. "I'm a fucking rockstar, Chris. That ain't enough publicity? This place is my baby, mine. What does that royal asshole know about what it's like to have a rough childhood? He thinks he can come here, give a little speech, smile for the cameras, and suddenly it's all about him?" 

"What, now you care?" 

He whirls on her, but the look she gives him makes him freeze. Chrissy sighs. 

"Eds, you are so busy with the new album and the tour, you haven't even met the new volunteers. I said I'd manage the place, and that's fine. But you must trust me. Just do it for me. Please?" 

*

The skate park has new graffiti, and he hasn't even seen it yet. Eddie exhales his cigarette smoke and watches how it curls up to the sign spelling Hellfire Youth Center.

Maybe Chrissy is right. Maybe he should be here more. Maybe he's been so caught up in the whole fame and fortune thing, he's losing sight of what's important, like- 

"Watch out!" 

Like guys on skateboards barrelling towards him. 

Eddie throws up his hands. The guy tries to swerve, completely tips his precarious balance, and goes flying off the board and right into him. They land on the asphalt with an undignified oomph. 

"Shit, sorry," babbles the guy and tries to disentangle his limbs from Eddie’s. "Couldn't brake-" 

"S alright," Eddie hears himself say, even though his ass hurts like a bitch from the impact and he can already feel the bruises forming. "You can fall into my arms any time." 

Skateboard guy blinks up at him and - fuuuck, he's cute! In a scrungly, beanie-stuffed-over-chestnut-locks, black-rimmed-nerd-glasses kind of way. 

For a second, nobody says anything. 

"For fuck’s sake," someone swears, and then little Max Mayfield is running towards them, ginger braids jumping with the movement. "I told you to be careful." 

"Sorry," cutie with the glasses says again. Eddie has never seen him around. He must be one of the new volunteers Chrissy mentioned. "Guess I'll need to practice some mo- ow, shit!" 

His hands fly up to cradle his knee. There's a hole and a rapidly spreading bloodstain in the fabric of his jeans. 

"Oh fuck," Eddie says, and whips his bandana from his back pocket to press it to the wound. "Red, why don't you hop inside and get the first aid kit? I'll stay here with …" 

He trails off expectantly. Cutie's eyes go wide. 

"I, erm … Dustin." 

"I'll stay here with Dustin." 

*

Dustin, it turns out, isn't just cute, but also fun to talk to. He doesn’t gush about what a huge fan he is or ask for an autograph once. Eddie never thought he'd appreciate that one day, but it gets really old really quick. 

Instead, they jump from one topic to the next, sitting on one of the benches and watching Max go on her board. Dustin has a quick, sharp wit and isn't afraid to counter Eddie’s jabs with his own, delightfully bitchy sense of humor. Damn, to think he almost missed this one. He really needs to be around more.

"I love this place, y’know? You created something great for these kids." 

Eddie jerks to attention. The sun has started to dip, casting Dustin’s smile and the hair poking from his beanie in a soft golden light. 

"Thanks man," Eddie murmurs, and feels the bitterness boil back up. "Some people seem to think it needs better publicity, though." 

Dustin shuffles awkwardly, winces when the movement pulls on the Care Bears bandaids Max has plastered all over his knee. 

"You mean the royal visit?"

Eddie huffs. 

"Yeah, man. I mean, what are they expecting me to do, bow and grovel while his Royal Doucheness prances all over the place with his perfect hair and fancy suit and thank him for it? It's not like he cares about these kids, it's all just a gig to him."

Dustin draws his bottom lip between his teeth.

"You can't know that. Maybe he does care. Maybe he's-" 

Eddie barks a laugh. "Oh, give me a break. All the royals are good at is looking important and spending our tax money. I can fucking do without-" 

"Steve? We gotta leave, c'mon." 

They both whip around. A fancy black limousine with tinted windows has pulled up in the parking lot behind them. A gruff looking man is holding the back door open and looking at them expectantly. 

Dustin sighs and stands. 

"Coming, Hop." 

"Wait, wait, what?" Eddie babbles as he walks towards the car, shoulders in a sad little hunch. "What's going on? Who's that guy? Why's he calling you-" 

And then it clicks. 

"Oh fuck," Eddie says. 

Dustin … no, Steve … no, Steven - Crown Prince Steven fucking Harrington - gives him a tight smile while the man ushers him into the backseat. 

"Thank you for your time, Mr Munson, I'll see you tomorrow. I'll try not to be too much of a douchebag, I promise." 

The door clicks shut. 

The car glides away. 

Eddie buries his face in his palms. 

"Jesus fucking Christ. He's the fucking Prince."

Beside him, wheels grate on asphalt as Max brakes.

"Wow," she deadpans. "You're in some deep shit." 

Eddie groans. 

Tomorrow is gonna be a long-ass fucking day. 

Part 2

All my holiday drabbles

[twig-tea]

I haven't been posting about it week to week but I have been keeping up with My Love Mix-up (the Thai adaptation) and I'm still sitting with how badly this latest episode (ep7) is sitting with me. I just have to purge this so I can move on. Criticism of the adaptation below [including spoilers through to the end of episode 7 and very vague spoilers for the source material].

I wish these show writers would not try to shoehorn an adapted work into the bubble, because this line they are trying to walk is disturbing. By having an older gay character tell Atom that he shouldn't characterize his relationship as different, it's suggesting that societal norms and social expectations are not real, but are something Atom invented. His fear is treated as a joke and an overreaction, something to overcome, and everything I've heard from Thai people in the real world tell me that is very much not the case. This is such a different message from the original manga and Japanese live action, which were both about having the strength to defend your relationship in front of obstacles and trust the people in your lives who have earned it. There's a huge difference between learning not to live in fear even though there are realistic things to be concerned about, and learning your fear was misguided/not based in reality after all so you can just let it go. Queer kids should not be taught to not trust their instincts about who to trust with their truths.

This is the same mistake GMMTV made with the changes they made to 23.5, and it tells me their writers fundamentally don't understand internalized homophobia. You don't develop internalized homophobia in a homophobia-free bubble--kids are not born with it, it has to be learned. We are taught to hate ourselves by parents, by media, by teachers, by strangers...to set a show in a world where that is not a reality, and then to have characters have those fears anyway, is insulting and dismissive of where those fears come from and how they are based on realistic fears about potential outcomes. Gay kids do lose their families and have their lives blown up over the people they love--that is not a joke or an overdramatic statement.

I am really upset by this. It feels like these shows are saying queer people are foolish and delusional for being afraid. I've had people in real life tell me that my concerns were overdramatic before, and I've also seen people badly hurt because they didn't take the threat of homophobia seriously enough. I just...it's not that I worry this will be a model for anyone's behaviour. But this adaptation took a story about characters I could relate to, and changed them so that the show instead instead is invalidating my experience. It feels dehumanizing. In trying to be an escapist piece of media, this show instead became painful for me to watch. I sincerely hope I'm an outlier and other queer folks watching this didn't feel it in the same way, because I don't want other people to be feeling how I'm feeling right now.

I'll be walking away from this one.

@bengiyo I think you mentioned feeling similarly disturbed by this approach in your stray thoughts, so I'm tagging you in case you wanted to add on.

[mullermilkshake]

Twelve days of fluffmas

On the fourth day of fluffmas, my true love gave to me...

Yakuza!Kento & Yakuza!Ino being the duo we adore and being the supportive friend everyone needs.

Day five

Yakuza!Kento x Reader (Kinda)

Tags: Yakuza AU, fem!reader, adorable duo, drinking alcohol, slight angst I guess because drunk Kento is unlike himself, Ino is adorable and he cares so much about Kento

The easiest way to get Kento Nanami to open up was to get him drunk.

Now, Ino didn't do this often because he saw it as disrespectful. But it was getting too much to see Nanami pining over a girl he hadn't spoken with and Ino saw this as an opportunity to let him get things off of his chest without him realising.

So he supplied the alcohol and snacks, and ventured over to the Nanami office after hours to surprise him.

Ino knew about you, like a woman scorned over a mistress her husband was hiding. Only Ino wasn't Nanami's wife, but rather what he saw as his best friend.

He knew his boss was hiding you away because he was too damn scared of just casually 'bumping' into you and seeing if you fancied him just as much as he apparently did.

The thing about the camera network in Nanami's office was that Ino wired the thing himself. So he could see which cameras had been looked at without doing much. What he didn't tell Nanami was that he could access the whole thing via his portable computer.

From what Ino saw, you were a woman working as a hostess, like many other girls in the Shinjuku district of entertainment. So there wasn't anything that he saw that made you stand out, not to him at least but you stood out to Nanami, that was the main thing.

And he noticed that if you were in Nanami's life, he might not take everything so seriously all the time.

So as Ino poured the fifth drink, his liver was already begging him to stop. Though in order to get Nanami to a point that he'd let lose and possibly not remember at all the next day, he had to keep going.

And once Nanami took a swig of the next drink, he didn't stop and instead necked the whole thing down straight.

"This is nice stuff, Ino. Where'd you get this?"

"Oh, you know, just somewhere," it cost him a weeks money just to get that thing.

Nanami's next response would gauge how drunk he was.

He looked down at the whiskey, nodded a little and lazily rubbed his eye. "Somewhere sounds good."

Okay, he might have been drunk enough. Ino had to try before he too was far too drunk to even ask. His poor liver.

"So, who's that girl you look at sometimes on the network."

Ino could have heard a pin drop after that question and for a moment he was sure that Nanami was about to either kick his ass or kick him out. Either one was bad.

"So you found out then?" he looked so deflated. "She's just a girl I bumped into once, but she's perfect."

"Why haven't you just approached her?" Ino asked him out of curiosity, but he was also looking for advice if he ever met someone he was interested in.

"I can't just do that Ino, you'll come to understand when you're face to face with a pretty girl and you don't know which way to look and your heartbeat is sat in your mouth because you're afraid you'll say the wrong thing."

Nanami poured another whiskey and chucked it back before the lid was screwed back on. "What if she doesn't find me interesting, or give me the time of day? There's ten years between us, did you know that? She'll think I'm this old man who preys on young women because I'm a Yakuza and no mature woman would ever get involved because they're smart."

Kento Nanami was only thirty four years of age.

He continued before Ino could get a word in. "She's smart enough to stay away from me and the clan... So I haven't said anything yet. I'd rather just watch from afar and make sure she's safe."

Ino didn't realise you had this sort of effect on him. How long had this really been going on for Nanami to just give up?

"She sounds pretty great."

You were if it made Nanami like this. Ino had never seen him quite like this to the point it was just so out of character for him even with alcohol in the mix.

"She is," he slumped on the desk with the bottle in his hand. "And I'm just... I'm not good for her."

"Well, how do you know?"

Nanami looked up at Ino with half lidded alcohol ridden eyes, rubbing his left one lazily though he was fully coherent at the point. The possibility of this conversation may have sobered him up.

That wasn't good for Ino keeping a low profile.

Oh well, he was past the point of no return now. "You once told me to never quit if I failed, to keep trying. Look where I am now. So I'll tell you the same thing."

He poured another drink for the two of them and took it back for courage. "It's Christmas after all and good things happen all the time, even for us Yakuza guys. So go out and find her, speak to her before it's too late and some other guy sweeps her off her feet."

Now he was sounding like his own father. It wasn't the most sound advice Ino could give him, but it was hopefully enough of a kick to get him moving. Firm enough just like the advice Nanami would give him wherever things got tough.

"If you can't go an approach a girl you like, then how am I supposed to do it?"

"You're right," he said, propping himself up on his elbow and watching Ino with such softness. Though it was because he was drunk. "I'm not setting the best example, am I?"

Ino smiled and leant back in his chair, smiling away and admiring the string of Christmas lights he put up the week prior. "Nah, you're good sir. But make a Christmas wish and see what happens, you know what'll happen if you don't speak to her. So let it go somewhere."

Nanami turned and observed the screens, taking the black and white images in as he sipped on his drink this time. "Alright then, perhaps you're right."

Then he turned back, his eyes more focused and trained on Ino. "I'll do things head on and decide how to approach this. I never thought I'd get a prep talk for you, Ino."

He stood up and wandered over to the screens, just his shadow was visible now in the darkened corner of the room. The golden hue of whiskey swirled around in his glass, aerating in his hand while he watched.

"Also, you could just ask about my personal affairs. There's no need to buy top shelf whiskey to get me drunk, though I appreciate the sentiment."

Shit. He figured it out and sobered up. "What, me? Get you drunk? Not at all sir, I wouldn't ever do anything like that. I just fancied a chat and got sentimental because it's Christmas."

Nanami chuckled and drank, turning to face him one more time.

"You're a terrible liar."

[insanityisthecure]

Seven Sentence Someday?

I was tagged by the lovely and talented @hedwigoprah for this, I believe it's seven sentences of a fic? I won't lie, I haven't posted writing online since fanfiction.net was in vogue, so please be kind.

This is an excerpt from an EmmRook short fic I've been working on, and is part of a scene where Rook and Emmrich are talking about her being sent away from The Mourn Watch before the events of the game.

"It's stupid." "It's not." said Emmrich, softly. "I've left the Necropolis, Nevarra only a few times, but always of my own volition, mostly on Mourn Watch business, and always with the promise of return. The Mourn Watch took us both in, gave us purpose, a family, it is so much of who I am. To be forced to leave would be akin to being forced to cut off a piece of myself." "That's..." Rook looked over her shoulder at him, "That's exactly how it felt."

I don't really know which mutuals write fics let alone Dragon Age, so I'm afraid I'm going to leave this without tagging others. Thank you again to @hedwigoprah for tagging me, hopefully this will be the start of me uploading my writing again.

[weirdly-specific-but-ok]

Just had the wild realisation that I can write whatever I want here. This is a thing that I am allowed to do. I can scream into the void. I don't have to tag my posts. Grammar is a social construct. It doesn't matter who's listening. The people I love and who love me will talk to me posts or no posts. Someone's going to read this and smile. Even if it's just me.

I can watch only the finales of shows to see their happy endings. I can eat cornflakes in the afternoon. I can go into bookstores just to creepily stare at the hardcovers of Victorian literature. I can write meticulous notes for subjects I'm not studying, and highlight it to Pinterest perfection. I can tell people I want to bite them out of sheer love. I can write long emails to my friends about weird slippers that remind me of them.

I can tell you that it's been a hot year, the hottest one to date, and that April hasn't seen a single drop of rain fall onto the earth. But it's hanging in the air, making it heavy with moisture and that relentless, relentless heat. It's muggy and the swamp theme I chose for my bullet journal couldn't be more appropriate. I can tell you how I keep singing that song in my head, Corner Of My Sky, the one whose music video has Michael Sheen wrangling with an occult toaster. "The rain, the rain, the rain, thank god the rain."

I can tell you anything I like. I can tell you that I'm afraid of being forgotten, that I've always longed to be famous, that I have a hard time not caring about every single little thing. I can tell you that I'm ace and I'm afraid that no one will ever love me the way I need them too, even if I love them the way that they need me to. I can tell you the nightmares have gotten better, but they're still there, they don't seem to want to leave me. I can tell you that I'm so much more ill and broken than I dare think about. Because I am afraid that if I start thinking about it, I shan't stop, and then it will become everything. And I don't want it to be everything. I can tell you that. I can tell you that I have beautiful memories, too, not just the fear and the loss and the anger.

I can tell you that I'm a performer, an entertainer, and I love making people laugh. I'm more comfortable on stage, where people are already listening, than trying to go up and make conversation to groups of strangers. I can tell you how wonderful it feels to have been able to speak to so many people all around the world, to have them know me, to listen to me, and to listen to them in turn. I can tell you that I don't know where to draw the line sometimes, I'm never entirely sure when I'm joking, and the act easily becomes a second skin. I can tell you all of that.

I can tell you all the things that I used to tell myself in letters sealed in envelopes addressed to Future Me. And it won't matter, and it does matter, and it's all so fucking absurd. It doesn't make any sense at all. Does it? I don't know. I can tell you that I don't know very much at all. Knock knock. Who's there? No one. No one who? No one who matters. Knock knock. I haven't been able to walk around for a month. This room is an oven and I'm being slow-cooked, broiled into a little Asmi pie. I read fanfiction yesterday after a long while. That was nice. I think it's really cool that you all know me. You do know me. Sometimes better than I know myself. I can tell you that.

I can tell you the truth. I can tell you I love you. And that to be seen and to be known is a gift that I will always be grateful for. I can tell you that you don't have to listen. But if you do, then hi! Nothing makes sense. Let's sit in the nonsense for a while. I have biscuits. Would you like one? I'm very human. It's one of the things that gets me so easily hurt. Maybe it happens to you too. I can tell you that my plant Crowley is surviving, unlike the others did. I can tell you that maybe you and I are, too.

It's 8:02 in the morning. I might just eat breakfast now. It does seem like the thing to do. How weird and wonderful that is.

[samsayswhatever]

For what it's worth, Saxon, as he remembers more details, looks confused, disgusted, uncomfortable, regretful, maybe even guilty.

When Lochlan remembers he looks afraid. What is he afraid of? His own gay thoughts? The repercussions of this? That Reddit is calling him a rapist? Saxon himself??

Hopefully he's not afraid of Saxon, but since I do want more angst, hopefully he's afraid of Saxon 😶 or at least what he thinks Saxon will think of him once they inevitably talk about it.

I mean it's the internet, everyone claims to be body language experts, but why do people ascribe fear to Saxon's facial expressions during the flashbacks and when he remembers, but ignore the fear in Lochlan's eyes which is obviously what the acting and direction were going for.

This is quickly becoming one of the most braindead fandom spaces I've ever been. It's all shallow analysis, actual misinformation, and lazy thoughtless moralism.

I think Lochlan is likely afraid of a lot of things, but my guess is he's mostly afraid of losing his family's respect and therefore their love and attention. He was so desperate for Saxon's attention that he had a threesome with him, and I hope now he might become aware of that desperation and what it means.

As far as the fandom being "braindead" I'd like to say that 4.2 MILLION people watched ep 6. And it only aired 2 days ago. Which means there are a lot of people making statements about the show in general, and they haven't had much time to analyze it. The show isn't over so not all the context is there for them to make a fair assessment of the characters or the show as a whole. As more people watch it, there are more episodes for them to binge watch rather than wait a week between episodes. So I think the thought put into the show is going to exponentially decrease as time goes on.

And even as much as I would love every person in the world to be fully media literate, even in America 54% of adults have literacy below a 6th grade level. I didn't learn to read english until the 7th grade, so maybe I'm not the most equipped person to say what a "6th grade reading level" actually means. But I do think that media literacy and regular literacy are connected concepts, and without regular literacy, media literacy could prove more difficult.

I would estimate there are about 2 million people who've seen the show that are going to have trouble reading into this shows complex and nuanced themes of desire and identity. This likely increases the amount of shallow analysis and misinformation.

As for the thoughtless moralism, that could maybe be contributed to the rise in conservatism that I've noticed in the last couple years. Maybe not, but it's just a thought. It could also be related to how this show likes to discuss taboo topics more than a lot of other shows I've watched in the same "famous actors, fun setting, murder mystery" type shows. So maybe people who aren't used to these topics are watching this show.

And even though this show has adult themes, I don't think it's only adults watching. I've seen a good number of people interacting with my tumblr content who's profiles say they are minors. So that is also something to take into account.

All that being said, it still sucks that the fandom can be like this. I initially tried finding twl takes on twitter, tiktok, and reddit - but a lot of it was really hard to read/watch. On tumblr its easier to filter out what I don't want to see with tags and blocking and such. I'm so glad I've found a lot of interesting people to interact with for this fandom though.

It's been a year since I participated in a fandom of a new show, and it's so alive. People are constantly making posts and realizations and putting together things I would never have thought to. It's amazing to get to see the fandom in action.

[incorrectmahabharatquotes]

Recently I saw this post by @god-has-adhd (I'm not reblogging it because I saw the people they tagged and realised very quickly that it's quite likely that us reblogging the post will be unwelcome, to put it mildly. I'm tagging the OP here anyway since it's a direct response to the post and it seemed only fair to engage in the conversation. I hope they don't mind.) OP urged everyone to watch the video regardless of the political leaning so in the spirit of giving everything a fair shot, we watched it. 'We' here refers to both me and Mod G. There are things we agree on with the guy speaking in the video and there are things we disagree with/think he didn't properly research. However, there is one thing that's most relevant to this blog and to me, personally so I'll be talking primarily about it. This is your long post warning, I'm afraid.

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"The Real Story of Eklavya"

The context for people who haven't watched the video is that the guy brings up two stories, one of Satyakama Jabali from the Upanishads and that of Eklavya from the Mahabharata. He brings up both these stories in the context of caste, he helpfully titles it and everything.

What I found interesting is that he frames himself talking about the story with the words "The real story of Eklavya". If you know even the basics of storytelling or filmmaking, you know that this is quite important. This implies that you, the viewer, do not know the real story and the one you know is either incomplete or false.

He begins, in a memorable instance, by asking ChatGPT for a summary to grasp the popular interpretation of the story of Eklavya and Drona. I have THOUGHTS about using a machine learning tool that is trained on data that is infamously biased and lacking when it comes to anything that isn't American, but that would be digressing from the point. ChatGPT provides him a summary that mentions that Eklavya was denied Drona's tutelage because he was of a lower caste. After this, the guy proceeds to recite the lines where Eklavya is mentioned in the Adi parva of the Sanskrit Mahabharat that we refer to as Vyasa's Mahabharat. He expresses surprise at how Eklavya is introduced as being the son of the "king" of the nishads (I think leader is a better word that should've been used but the Sanskrit text has a notorious habit of having just really questionable ways of referring to people, if you've read it you know.) Which is found HILARIOUS. Bro, what do you mean you're surprised? This is COMMON knowledge, I fear.

He mentions how being the son of the nishaad's leader/king effectively puts him on the same level as Arjun and that they're both princes. He says that this means Eklavya isn't shudra or dalit (there is a word that's curiously absent here that I'll mention in a bit.) Now, this one of those parts where the choice information he presents the viewer with is bizarre. Since I promised I'll give it a fair shot, I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt and assume this is a fault of him not researching enough and not willful omission. Maybe he just doesn't know. The information he's given here is correct, mostly. What he DOESN'T explain is who the nishads, as a group are. I'll fill in the blanks for him.

The nishad are said to be a group of tribal people who reside in the hills. The text he reads out even has the word "tribal" in it but the guy sort of glosses over it? The nishads are sort of like an aggregate grouping of different tribal populations and not the name of a specific tribe. Kind of. But the mention is still significant. See, the Mahabharata, especially the Sanskrit text, has this Thing™ that it does where it's incredibly rare to find a mention of tribal populations who are said to be human, many of the other mentioned tribal groups are demi-humans or non-humans or just straight up rakshahsas.

Eklavya is said to be the adopted son of Hiranyadhanus, the aforementioned king/leader of the nishads. The Harivamsa Purana part of the Sanskrit text (which is a giant-ass genealogy section where it traces the family line from the start of existence to the birth of Krishna) mentions that biologically he's the son of Devashrava, Vasudev's brother, which makes him Krishna's cousin by blood. Eklavya was abandoned by Devashrava in the forest and Hiranyadhanus found him and raised him as his own.

This makes Eklavya a tribal boy, I would use the word adivasi but people might disagree so I'll just say he has a tribal heritage, not by blood but by his upbringing. The man in the video says that Eklavya isn't a shudra, or dalit or untouchable, which is technically true. There's a missing word here that's doing a lot of heavy lifting for him, though. He says that Eklavya is a Kshatriya, which is DEBATEABLE because in the epic we've seen time and time again that blood doesn't matter and it's the society that does. With this, hopefully not to y'all, new information we might understand how the guy's assertion that Arjuna and Eklavya are on equal footing is shaky at best.

He continues to explain that in the text the reasoning why Drona refuses Eklavya is because he'd already promised he'd make Arjun The Best Archer. Since, he's bound by obligation to the Kurus, he can't afford to let Eklavya outshine his kuru students. The man proceeds to assert that in the text there is no caste-based discrimination happening here. Ergo, he concludes, the story of Eklavya doesn't have a caste aspect to it. If you believe otherwise, you're uneducated and need to learn the Truth and not fall into Propoganda. (I'm trying to be charitable to the guy but his tone when he says the word "propoganda" is dripping with disdain and it's making it very hard for me to remain charitable.) He ends this section this way.

This guy says he's given you all the facts. He's cited his source and he's said the complete truth. He hasn't. In this man's viewpoint, the complete and true Mahabharat is the Sanskrit text. Which, as you know, ISN'T what the entirety of the Mahabharat is and claiming that it is is a narrow perspective to see it. (Which is FUNNY considering this guy has a whole section towards the end of the video about Nuance and it's ironic that he's unwilling to provide the same nuance about the epic to his trusting audience.) Maybe he just isn't insane enough like me to know that it isn't the entire Mahabharat. It's possible.

There is a viewpoint that declares that the Sanskrit Text is the primary source and everything else isn't "canon". There's a SPECIFIC word for it but I will not say it because it's like a boogeyman word on hindublr, at least, so I'll omit the word in this post. This man, from what I've seen, shares this viewpoint.

I disagree.

The Mahabharat, is first and foremost a collection of oral traditions of storytelling that were written down much later. This means that the entire corpus of work that is this mammoth of an epic consists of the thousands of written texts, poetry, plays, songs, folk tales, recently it also includes cinematic adaptations, bedtime stories that your elders might have told you, and lastly, popular culture for better or for worse. This is my viewpoint and I feel it provides for a much better lens to engage with the story. Otherwise, you're denying the story of the rich tradition and heritage it was forged in.

The guy in the video wonders why the story of Eklavya is more popular than Satyakama Jabali and there are a lot of reasons for it. First is that the epic is simply more popular and, in many ways, more fun than the upanishad stories. Second is that the story of Eklavya captured people's minds because it's a story that has strife and the ending is unsatisfactory. Tragedies inspire emotions and connection in a way that comedies do not. There are many more reasons but I'll stop listing them.

It's not a coincidence or happenstance that there are caste dynamics added in the popular interpretation of the story. There are even seeds of this in the Sanskrit text, if this guy is truly only looking at that alone, Eklavya being a tribal kid, the way his physical appearance is described in the text, the way he's stopped from sharing a space with the kuru princes etc. If a variety of people who have historically faced similar things especially when it comes to education and find themselves mirrored in Eklavya? That's not Propaganda, as the guy puts it. It's just how stories naturally evolve and grow. It's people reading between the lines. There's no conspiracy at play. Just people finding something to relate to when they cannot relate to any other character.

I can write essays on how caste and varna show up in the Mahabharat (and I might, if even ONE person asks me for it) but to sum it down, it's a task of examining exactly who and what KIND of people are absent from the story. The Invisible People, if you will. You can count on your fingers how many shudra, dalit and adivasi figures are in the Mahabharat.

Drona is a teacher who fails at being a teacher in this instance. (The Mahabharat in many ways is a story of people failing to do their Duty. There's a certain peacock feather wearing guy who does a whole song and dance about it. It can cover a whole book. It's quite popular. Maybe you've heard of it?) Even if you ignore the caste dynamics reading of it, you cannot deny that the man just sucked at being a teacher in that moment when he denied education to a student, whatever his reasoning may be. He brutally asks for the kid to maim himself and again, even the Sanskrit text describes this action of Drona as cruel. He creates a barrier for Eklavya to stop him from continuing to practice his archery.

It's not surprising that Drona is read as a stand in for an education system that sucks at being an education system that does its job. Again, it's not a conspiracy or propaganda. It's people trying to connect to a story through the prism of their life experiences.

It is not my place to tell people what to believe and what not to believe. It's not the guy in the video's either, despite what he says. People's interpretations are personal to them. What is my place is to remind people that it's wrong to deny people their interpretations. There are versions and interpretations of the story that I hate or dislike but I'm not standing here and telling you they're not the Truth. This is the nuance that Mahabharat requires that the guy lacks. This is also why I believe his sources and research is lacking in this department.

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Beyond Eklavya

There's a lot of other thoughts and things I want to share about the rest of the video. I'll try to summarise the highlights.

There's a part where he doesn't understand what systemic patriarchy means, exactly, even though he himself gave an EXCELLENT example of it towards the start of the video with Satyakama Jabali's mother's heritage not being considered when it comes to his gotra. It was frustrating because he SAID it. He said the perfect example himself. I almost thought he set it up as a complete circle moment but he hadn't.

I appreciate him bringing a Shaivite perspective because I'm honestly tired of so much Vaishnavism at all times. I love to see different schools of Hinduism actually being practiced and not just one dominating and subsuming the others.

Towards the start of the video, Mod G predicted that the man would go on a "Periyar sucks" rant and I was so delighted that G was so right.

The guy in the video neglects to look at any contemporary research and scholarship about the linguistics and the Aryan migration theory(which he calls the invasion theory, obviously) including the genetic studies.

There's a funny bit where whenever the guy mentions Ambedkar he has to assert that he thinks Ambedkar is anti-hindu. Even when he's praising him. It happened multiple times.

-------------

TL;DR The man in the video fails to provide his viewers with the full picture about the story of Eklavya even when he claims he is.

- Mod S

ALSO

The structure of his arguments are poor especially in the section where he talks about why the North-South divide came about. Does he not know about the field of linguistics and how root languages are established? Telugu as a language has a 'Dravidian' (he seems to hate that word, even though Dravida is not just the anglo word for the southern parts of India) root because of certain features it has. Notice how North Indian languages use Gender. And then, notice how Southern/central or even Adivasi languages use gender. One main reason why Dravidian languages have been speculated to have another root language different to Sankskrit is the counting systems. Its not wrong to say Telugu has sanskrit INFLUENCE, but again, look at WHICH people within the language group use that type of Telugu (spoiler alert, its the 'proper' upper castes). He dismisses that entirely and makes it a whole issue about how the North South divide happened.

Its very clear to me that he has no intention of representing any of the counter arguments to his premise in an honest manner and is instead single mindedly trying to create more propaganda.

-Mod G

[issilya]

I've been tagged? In a WIP Wednesday? Like what? Thank you @casino-lights ! That's a first for me 🥹

So then: I dislike rewriting entire quests that happened in game if I'm not really changing much, but I still needed to address the first time Esha and Lucanis met in the Ossuary, so this became more of a retrospective that should lead to an actual scene. Haven't yet decided what scene that should be though, so might as well share it here so it doesn't rot in my google docs!

For Spite, her voice was the first thing he heard that wasn't there to hurt him. It was there to hurt others. “I came here for the crow, whether you want to throw your lives in the package is up to you.”

But Lucanis wasn't sure what to make of the de Riva that was apparently breaking him out. The way her icy-blue eyes measured him when he stood before her. The squint in her eyes, and a smile in the corner of her lips. The other elf with her immediately noticed: “He's possessed!”  But his fellow crow did not seem bothered by it. It was no surprise Spite was immediately intrigued by her.  “I wasn't expecting… that.” Her voice was playful, almost tinted with praise. A tone that brought only pain for a year now. But not this time, it seemed. Unless? Could this be a trick, he wondered?

She walked softly, her gaze transfixed on the sea. A whale passed above them and she hummed at it, spinning on her toes as she followed it with her eyes. Her fingers brushed the enchanted walls gently, as if she was afraid to break them with touch - but too curious to just leave them alone. She was relaxed as she turned her back to him, while her companion kept eyeing him suspiciously. He almost felt taunted by how careless she was around him. Or was it Spite who felt taunted?

So vulnerable.

But then he saw her fight. The way she dashed towards the few Venatori still left in the prison, the smile on her face as she cut them open. There was a feral fury in her that gave him a chill. She was not the killer many crows grew to be. There was a deliberate slowness in some of her moves, as if she found pleasure in the act. She inhaled the smell of blood like a hound on a trail.

They walked by the torture cells in silence. He could tell she was thinking about it - about what he went through - as she passed the tables and looked at Zara's notes. He looked for pity or disgust in her eyes, like he would expect, but there was none of it. No judgement. Nothing, but focus on the goal and a stoic mask he could not read.

When Calivan lay dead, she reached down to his body and unceremoniously snapped a necklace off him. She tied the gemmed medallion to her belt like a trophy.

Her bloody fingers carelessly brushed a strand of hair behind her tattooed ear before she looked at him with a smile. Satisfaction of a job well done.

“Time to go?” She asked so matter-of-fact, as if they didn't just fight demons and horrors beyond comprehension. As if she wasn’t talking to an abomination. So undisturbed.

Careful. She knows we're not right.

Yes, she knew. But she didn't seem to care like he would expect. Not like her friend, visibly nervous. And Lucanis wasn't sure if that should worry him.

He expected questions. But she only spared him a short glance when they were on the way back to the shore. A shadow of a smile danced on her lips as she lowered her hand into the water. It weaved softly between her fingers as the boat moved. She leaned back and closed her eyes.

The Veil Jumper with her seemed less relaxed. She tried to work through the tension. “So, you're Lu-”  “Bellara.” De Riva cut her off in a low voice. A reminder not to talk with other crows around. “Right. Sorry, Rook. Maybe later.” The elf's heavy earring jingled as she focused on her shoes. They spent the time in silence as the crow who waited for them paddled back to the shore. Lucanis’ mind wandered as he watched Treviso’s roofs get closer. Rook. A curious nickname. How did she get it?

Their eyes met when they got to the docks. She saw the shock in him - the look she gave him dared him to keep it together. He let her lead the way to the Diamond, and she walked slowly, letting him take in the change in his city. The reality of occupation he had no idea about. The reality she did not have the courtesy to prepare him for on their way back.

[indestructibleheart]

Hi, fam! Okay, so I'm going to be out at an appointment tomorrow morning, so I'm kicking this off a little bit early. It's technically Wednesday in several timezones and very nearly Wednesday in mine. I'm... also a bit eager to share this, ngl.

I know that I've shared a lot of angst lately, but I swear that's not all I'm doing. 😅 In fact, the actor/playwright AU decided to wallop me in the face out of nowhere after sitting in my WIP folder for months. I'm really excited about it, so I'm gonna share the first scene!

(Also, those of you who have been to New York with me will recognize my favorite brunch spot in this scene lmao.)

---

You probably didn't even know I was in the room, but I noticed you straight away. You were talking with your friends, happy and animated and fully alive—a person living in dimensions I couldn’t access—and so beautiful. Your hair was longer then. You were the center of attention, but you weren’t afraid. You had a yellow ipê-amarelo in your pocket. I thought, this is the most incredible thing I have ever seen; I'd better keep it a safe distance away from me. I thought, if someone like that ever loved me, it would set me on fire.

INT. MOM'S KITCHEN & BAR - HELL'S KITCHEN - LATE MORNING

"I'm telling y'all," Alex is saying, punctuating with dangerously large bites of his pancake burrito. "The dude's a dick." 

It's been two hours since the nightmare audition, but Alex has been on this tirade since June and Nora first slid into the retro diner chairs across from him (at least forty-five minutes ago).

They're at Mom's: a restaurant-bar in midtown that can only be described as millennial nostalgia incarnate. The trio fell in love with it two years back—post-karaoke, stumbling in right before closing—when Alex saw God in their Fruity Pebble pancakes.  Since then, it's been his favorite place to eat his feelings.

Mom's is just really fucking comforting in general, honestly; whether it's the televisions cycling through episodes of 'Rugrats,' 'Dexter's Laboratory,' and 'Hey, Arnold!' or  the rainbow straws and Lisa-Frank-looking menus, Alex can't be sure. It doesn't hurt that they've made friends with several of the waitstaff, including an eccentric bartender, Pez, whose pink hair and painted nails fit right in with the decor. 

Today, it's the combination of breakfast sausage, bacon, eggs and cheese wrapped up in a syrup-soaked pancake that's really doing something for him. It could also be the margarita the size of his face, which Pez placed in front of him before making himself uncharacteristically scarce. But it's fine. He's probably just busy.

Alex won't admit it out loud, but what really helps is having June and Nora here to talk to… even though Nora is scrolling on her phone.

"I'm sorry," June says. She pokes an ice cube with her straw, and Alex watches as it bobs around her mimosa like a buoy. "That sounds like it sucked, but if he's really that rude… maybe you didn't want to work with him anyway."

Nora doesn't look up as she pops a home fry into her mouth. 

"Several sources say he's difficult to work with," she adds, evidently reading about Henry on the internet. "Though, in his defense, his dad did just die, like, three years ago… and there was that whole thing when he came out after. Remember?"

Alex does remember. Henry's grandmother, Mary Mountchristen, runs a pretty major company that used to own half the theatres on the West End. When Henry came out last year, she tried blacklisting his shows from her properties to punish him—which totally backfired when it got around. At least a dozen other queer writers and producers started talking about how they were also denied the space, and Mary was stoned on the streets of the theatre district. Like, metaphorically. 

Alex, Nora, and June had just moved to New York, but between June's position at Newsday and both Alex and Nora on the audition circuit, it was all anyone in their new circles could talk about. They were some of the first to know when the Mountchristens were bought out of their properties and Henry moved to the States.

This show is the first of Henry's being produced here—and it's autobiographical, which Alex has to admit is pretty fucking baller. So, yeah, Nora's not wrong. He has reason to be standoffish. Still, it doesn't explain why Alex was only halfway through his audition monologue when Henry abruptly stood up and exited stage left as if pursued by a bear.

He shoves another forkful into his mouth. "It's just, like, they're the only people who let me into the room," he says, barely finishing chewing. "Nobody wants to take me seriously, and I really thought this was my shot, you know?"

June and Nora both know Alex is having a hard time landing serious roles after growing up on a sitcom—Nora more than most, as his former co-star. What they don't know is that losing this role, specifically, feels like a kick to the stomach. From the moment Alex saw the script, he wanted to be a part of it. He can't even explain why, and now he'll never figure it out. Henry wouldn't give him a chance.

"It wasn't your only shot, and you know it." Nora fixes him with a look. "Seriously, I get it—I do—but it's just one play, buddy."

June nods. "Something will happen for you, baby brother."

At that, Alex finally groans. "Okay, calling me baby brother doesn't help me feel better about the entertainment industry infantili—"

"—itty bitty, teeny weeny—"

Alex throws a home fry at her face. 

It bounces off her forehead and into the giant gauntlet holding her mimosa with a very unappetizing splash. Just as Alex throws his hands into the air with a victorious whoop, his phone buzzes on the table. 

A glance is all it takes for him to see that it's his agent, Zahra.

"Damn," he says, deflating. There goes that upswing. "You answer it."

June balks. "Me?"

"I don't need to hear how fucking badly it went. Trust me, I got the message." Alex blinks innocently, like he's six years old again, asking her to lie to their mom about that broken vase. "Please, Bug? Besides, Zahra actually likes you."

"Everyone likes me." June rolls her eyes, but she caves—answering the phone with a haughty, "Alex Claremont-Diaz's office," before breaking into a smile. "Yeah, Z. It's me… No, Alex is feeling a little sensitive today."

(He throws another home fry at her. This one misses.)

To her credit, June's face remains totally blank as Zahra no doubt tells her how Alex insulted Henry Fox's name and all of his inbred ancestors just by showing up, or whatever—which is extremely annoying and unhelpful—but, once she says goodbye and sets the phone back down on the table, her face breaks out into a grin.

"Guess you didn't suck too bad," she says. "They want you for the part."

He doesn't know if it's Nora throwing herself at him or the shock that knocks him onto the floor.

Tagging some lovelies. If you haven't been tagged and you want to be, consider this your tag!

@anchoredarchangel, @barbiediaz, @cha-melodius, @cricketnationrise, @guillermosfamiliar, @hgejfmw-hgejhsf, @hippolotamus, @inexplicablymine, @jettestar, @junebugclaremontdiaz, @kiwiana-writes, @lizzie-bennetdarcy, @missgeevious, @mulderscully, @myheartalivewrites, @ninzied, @nontoxic-writes, @notspecialbabe, @priincebutt, @rmd-writes, @rosedavid, @three-drink-amy, @treluna4, @vanillahigh00, @welcometololaland, @orchidscript, @ships-to-sail, @stereopticons

[reigraceee]

Notes from a first time Severance viewer Pt 2

prev part / severance notes tag / next part

*spoilers for both seasons one and two!**

You can read Pt 1 Here if you're interested/haven't already, but you don't need to. Basically, the run down is a couple days ago a binge watched Severance and took some notes while I went. I wanted to share my thoughts since I've had a pretty different experience, being able to watch it all together. I also just wanted to put it all out there into the void because I don't have anyone to talk to lol.

I'm also interested how other's experience, so I'd love it if you commented/reblogged with your own thoughts/experiences (I've finished the whole series so feel free to spoil lol).

Alright, so we left off on the season 1 finale:

^the way Mark was joking with Helly about waking up to see each other but instead finds himself with Ms. Cobel still kills me

^I really expected Helly's outie to be nicer lol. I wasn't ready for how different outies and Innies could be. At this time my theory was that Innies and Outies were influenced by each others subconsciousness so that they were effectively the same people just molded by their situations differently. Which isn't wrong, I don't think, but I assumed that if Innie Helly hated Lumon those feelings would seep into Outie Helly's perception. At first, I even though the reason Helly was so resistant towards Lumon must have had something to do with her Outie's feelings. I wasn't ready for Helly's outie to have none of her rebelliousness at all.

Off topic, but in retrospect I wonder if Mark recognized Helena in the parking lot and if Helena took in interest in Mark since before S2 (why were they in that parking lot alone)

^I was worried Mark would go on thinking Devon was his wife lol

^still waiting for this answer lol

^this was the beginning of my annoyance with Irv's story. I was sooo stressed for them and I was certain that there was no way Irving would be able to find anyone and tell them everything in time. I thought it would make much more sense for him to write a note for his outie to find. It was KILLING ME.

I adore Irving but I couldn't help but feel like he's been wasted. I felt like his arc started becoming increasingly trivial to the main plot, but maybe (fingers crossed) S3 will make up for that.

^Too bad Helena wasn't as bad at acting as Helly. Sigh.

(I'm getting ahead of myself but Helena faking being Helly actually wrecked me. I felt that heartbreak firsthand.)

^Justice for Ricken. Mark's Outie just wasn't ready for Ricken's genius yet smh

^looking back it's just that Helly is who Helena is supposed to be if that makes sense. It's a whole nature vs nurture thing of course, but I also think being plopped into a vacuum Helly became the person she meant to be without the pressures put on her growing.

^I was shaking my head at the screen so furiously lol, I could see no way Irv's plan would go his way

^Just taking a moment of gratitude that the thing I wanted most to happen in season 1 (the kiss) and the thing I wanted most to happen in this episode (Mark telling Devon everything) both actually happened because from here I was afraid we would lose everything else lol.

^THIS WAS A JOKE

I love Milcheck so much and I'm glad he made it to season 2, but I so didn't want him to mess up the mission and I was ready to go to extreme lengths lmao

^Helena is such a liar. Does she ever not lie? She needs a nice threptic session with Ms. Casey to let all her lies out, they must be building up lol

^that switch up is still kind of confusing maybe I missed something (also just realized that I misspelled her name lol)

^Still sad we didn't get to see outie Irv waking up lol

what I really wanted to happen was for Mark to stay severed and blissfully unaware while somehow getting his back. I was sure that the whole Gemma reveal would kill the chanced of Mark x Helly, so going into S2 I was just glad Mark x Helly was canon while I expected it to immediately fall apart.

I felt like they just inserted the whole Mark x Helly thing for drama's sake, so I was very pleasantly surprised that it actually became such an important part of the story in S2!

Update: pt 3 here