#I have zero self control with color lol

[blackcathjp]

blackcathjp's drarry fic rec masterlist

UPDATED: jan 7, 2025 | total fics: 50

collection of my recommended fics with my short reviews/summaries. sorted by word count. most fics are dmhp and explicit unless noted otherwise. feel free to send me recs or if you want to discuss fics!

❤️ = favorites

🌟 = all-time favorites

SHORT FICS (under 10k)

all hues in his controlling by wolfpants (1k) ❤️

harry de-ages himself for kinky birthday sex with draco. morally grey and hot indulgence of age difference and virginity kink.

the banned pasta by hoko_onchi (1k, G)

i love when draco does obscure pureblood courting traditions that don't make sense.

aching with want by nv-md (2k)

draco takes care of harry in the middle of the night, with praise kink and some gentle dirty talk. first person pov.

the best treasure is up harry’s arse by bafflinghaze (2k)

bratty harry feat. draco’s dirty mouth and obsession with his arse.

tense by faithwood (2k)

dmhp, mentions of hpdm; hot hot hot. did i mention hot? their spicy banter and draco's nervous confidence and harry's confidence-turned-begging is so hot.

50 reasons to have sex series: for revenge / because it's raining / because you're in a hotel by gracerene (2k)

dmhp + hpdm; series of one-shots inspired by a tv show. the ones above are my favorites!

a little less than civil by froggy-o (3k, G)

professors drarry where nobody knows... their little secret! but they're kinda obvious... when flirting meets animosity.

an unconventional intervention by phdmama (3k) ❤️

super hot and tender fic where draco helps harry get out of his head. let him oral fixate! let draco indulge in his seemingly out-of-reach fantasy!

arms and elbows by iota_after_dark (3k)

hpdm but dmhp-coded; harry is desperate to please draco, which means trying something new - fisting. draco is so bossy and hot here. also they’re weirdo roommates w/ zero boundaries lol.

automatic joy by leontina (3k)

funny scenario where the wand has search history. harry transfigures objects into dildos with draco’s wand.

the black cat of good fortune by kitty_fic (3k, T)

look at my username like... i need more cat harry. tender and comforting, self-healing vibes!

imperio by tenthousandyears (3k)

consensual non-con with dom/sub. they have filthy, humiliating, degrading sex and fall in love.

smart brevity by lucifergraced (3k)

draco malfoy is an arse man. he likes what he sees, he will take what he wants. uniform kink and fingers in mouth. that’s it.

effervescence by thecouchsofa (4k)

drarry have sex while using veritaserum, feat. daddy kink, praise kink, light dom/sub.

dinner and diatribes by hephaestiions (5k) 🌟

legilimency sex is SO UNDERRATED. altered my brain chemistry. established loving relationship, with draco knowing how to help and ruin harry. be his peace of mind and make him crackle with sexual need and wild magic. filthy, intimate, and comforting. “to forever and a day” is such a devastating declaration of love.

dirty fucking dangles by p1013 (5k)

hockey players who get the hots for e/o’s impressive athleticism and some impact play!

the way you say my name by innerlilith (5k) 🌟

transformed my brain chemistry, the reason for my obsession with sweet pet names. their relationship develops in such a real way, the banter is so drarry, the tension is perfect! also really love draco’s “unhinged flirt” characterization. harry getting so hot under the collar is just *chef’s kiss*.

snug by moonflower_rose (6k)

touch-starved harry has a strange habit of touching his dick in a non-sexual way and draco becomes extremely fixated and can't stop looking at him.

sweet like candy in my veins by shahwrites (7k)

magical theorist harry is intelligent and cool, and vampire draco wants to help him fight evil! they are in love, your honor!

color, love? by chou_latte (7k)

just straight up pwp.

friends at last by lettered (8k)

a simple handjobs and grinding fic filled with soul-crushingly sweet dirty talk. it’s so vulnerable and tender and how i imagine super in love drarry to be - full of lust and gentle care.

service bell by shiftylinguini (8k)

werewolf (slight service top vibes) draco x vampire harry. cottage in the woods vibe + fwb + getting back together again.

all i have to do by fluxweed (9k) ❤️

draco expects a hyper-realistic sexual fantasy and unknowingly ends up w/ the real deal. harry ditches hermione to indulge in this sudden dreams-come-true sexcapade. oops.

just a trial run by tenthousandyears (9k) ❤️

dmhp, one hpdm scene; d/s fic that blew my mind. plays with alcohol kink, praise kink, “sex worker” kink, consensual dub-con, and more. discovering their love by doing lots of debauchery!

MEDIUM FICS (10k-30k)

the complete idiot’s guide to losing your entire mind by oknowkiss (10k)

hpdm, with mentions of switching; utterly depraved no nut november concept with a big full-on humiliation kink. greedy dom draco and sex-dumb sub harry!

fantastic flip fuck by hoko_onchi (10k)

switching; pornstars drarry who have to film a scene together, but they never expected to be REALLY into each other. deliciously hot and super funny.

stamina spells pleasure by lettered (10k)

bonkers multiple orgasms fic with dom draco and magical spells for sexy times! when i say harry deserves to be RAILED and reduced into a needy little mess, i mean this!

bedroom hymns by writcraft (11k)

kink exploration fic. quite slytherin of harry to ask draco out on a date to find out more about draco’s rumored sexual preferences and activities. very not demure, very not mindful.

on target by milkandhoney and the_sinking_ship (13k) ❤️

a favorite! flirting through charity donations and a dunk tank challenge, resulting in a steamy locker room session.

the earth from a distance by spqr (15k)

genius and competent draco and action-oriented, need-to-be-useful harry! masterful world-building about 16th century hogwarts, lovely speculative twist on life in the past. survival-based co-dependent relationship turned into intimate & loving romance.

paragraph twelve, clause four by innerlilith (15k) 🌟

lust, tension, longing, gentleness. quidditch player harry + sexy bodyguard draco, with a silly premise of hearing your love/hate crush wank loudly next door. the push and pull, the burning need, you just have to be there, the build up is so worth it.

as per request by thecouchsofa (17k)

virgin harry ridiculously propositions a very incredulous draco. love the banter, love the heat between them.

solemates by shiftylinguini (17k)

silly workplace step/walking competition turned into fwb turned into falling in love. they’re so annoyingly cute in this.

two weeks by shiftylinguini (21k) 🌟

overprotective possessive veela harry, who is emotionally sick until he “meaningfully connects” w/ his important person… aka, draco! the sexual tension and pining is portrayed so well, and creatively manifests in harry’s new veela body. i love this wry humor, no-nonsense draco so much.

knot your average coworkers by thecouchsofa (22k) ❤️

werewolf draco and oblivious harry! subtle praise kink, great feisty banter. sweet and hot fic about harry’s desire to care for draco, and draco being baffled by that. also, harry’s obsessed with his knot 😏

lusimeles by orphan_account (23k) 🌟

devastatingly tender. harry is self-destructive in dealing w/ his trauma, but Mr. Draco Malfoy wrecks his plans. draco just knows what needy harry wants and needs, which is to be taken care of, loved, and kept. i love this line from harry: “how nice it was to be understood without words.” 🥹

the superfluous man by peu_a_peu (24k)

funny dialogue and a silly premise like wdym harry got pregnant through draco's magical come-cocktion?? draco is such a disastrous mean loser (perfect characterization imo) who just wants to be around harry and make him laugh.

back where we began by cassiara (25k)

oh. my. god. slightly teacher/student dynamics but not really, combined with accidental bonding and sorta legilimency because harry is impulsive and curious and obsessed with draco’s voice in his head.

LONG FICS (30k+)

in the dark, in the light by phrynne (32k)

threesome with omc; very intense bdsm fic with sub harry and dom draco. the tension is PALATABLE.

you send me (honest you do) by firethesound (37k)

aurors drarry! harry is accidentally de-aged (physically), which unlocks draco’s buried feelings. great writing on intimacy, love, comfort, humor, pining (draco’s pining HURTS SO GOOD).

see me and live by dodgerkedavra (37k)

harry has such a huge (and quite hilarious) crush on draco that it can feel so overwhelming for him (along with all the other thoughts in his head). draco is so brilliant with magic and so incredibly patient, kind, and warm with harry. makes me SICK just how sweet and caring they both are with each other in recognizing what the other needs.

eternally consistent by kitsunealyc (44k)

mystery time travel fic where the ending adds a whole new perspective. delicious drarry development in this one.

sealed with a kiss by faithwood (46k) ❤️

switching; god i love this fic so much. the epitome of "i don't want him... but i want him". jumping through all these hoops and tricks while being in denial of your true feelings... THE DELUSION!

perpetual motion, perpetual sound by dodgerkedavra (51k)

dodger has a way of delivering sexy scenes, only to devastate you several pages later with heartbreaking scenes. fascinating exploration of magical theory, mental health, dealing with trauma, and being in love.

only for october by dodgerkedavra (58k, wip)

dmhp + hpdm; lovely fic disguised as an unassuming “fwb have a kinky month of sex” story. drarry deal with inner demons by taking care of e/o through sex to ground themselves in reality. they fall in love in the process AND there’s an intriguing mystery plot. it’s so good.

whisky-tango-foxtrot by vukovich (58k) 🌟

transformed my life. unrelentingly absurd and over-the-top funny with refreshing characterization and humor. drarry’s animagus traits seep into their human behavior - adrenaline junkie, horny trashy slut harry x inexperienced, dramatic, mate-for-life draco. it’s a hot wild ride.

dwelling by aideomai (83k)

changed my life fr, i thought about this for WEEKS and was so heartbroken. so much melancholy and heartache. idk if i can read it again knowing what happens... it's very bittersweet.

azoth by zeitgeistic (88k) 🌟

hpdm, mentions of switching; need more competent, determined, "fuck you i'm gonna prove you wrong!" genius harry! love this take on harry who sets his mind to something and discovers he is quite (book)smart. i love that draco guides and tutors him throughout it. so much love and research from the author, it's such a genius fic. also love the years-long pining and angst.

hothouse flowers and hot hot showers by azalea_larae, with art by boshspice (101k) ❤️

harry has very obsessive grand fantasies in this fic. the sexual tension is so intense. roommates don’t ACT like this… harry puts himself through intense pining and (imaginary) heartache. there is one crazy massage scene... you just have to be there!!!

far from the tree by aideomai (112k) 🌟

dmhp, one hpdm scene; a favorite! draco can’t believe harry wants him, yet he’s posessive and can’t let him go. harry’s obsessed and will do anything to protect him. throw in some angst, mystery, kinky times, next gen kids, draco calling harry “darling” (and subsequently changing the trajectory of my life), and voila! a masterpiece.

[bythenineshards]

You asking me not to encourage you makes me want to encourage you even more. Tell me more about Dr. Cavendish, what’s she like? what does she look like? Is there aaaaanyone she likes *blinkblink*? I am lying in front of you like we are at a sleepover and kicking my feet and looking at you so sweetly like I’m asking you about your crush. Come oooon, come ooooooooooooon~

(Don’t actually come on if you don’t want to but if you feel like… you need permission or interest to post self indulgent oc stuff *gestures* I love OCs! I wanna hear all about the little fellas you all make)

I have no self-control, lol. Honestly, interest and permission is really nice. I'm right there with ya with the sleepover image. Got on my jammies and everything. It's high school all over again. Which was the last time I fell for an evil clown. Man, I have had zero character development.

Syre is between 28 and 32 in age, fairly short and petite, fair skinned, brown eyes with cotton candy pink hair. I know lots of characters have pink hair in One Piece but I just can't picture her with a different color. I tried. The style is cropped short and curly. Her bangs are one large curl that swoops from one side and spirals at the other. Sorta like jigglypuff but to the side? When I have art of her, it'll be posted here. Shamelessly. Her typical outfit is inspired by a plague nurse or doctor. I haven't quite settled on the colors. I'm drawn to white or cream and gold. But idk...

Personality-wise, she's fairly soft spoken and kind. Her upbringing has led to this prim and proper manner of being and it leds itself well to bedside manner. She's not a pushover though. I have one scene where she's trying to help just Buggy's head and he's being difficult. She flicks his nose and wrestles his head into being pinned. Spending time with Buggy gives her the freedom to be more open, shameless and bubbly. She also can't lie to save her ass.

You and I both know she's head over heels for that clown. He doesn't say that he cares about her in front of the crew but when they're alone, he shows it 😏. The crew has pieced it together. More often than not, I imagine her walking about and his hand will be in hers or at the small of her back.

After he figured out who she was, he took to teasingly calling her "Princess" just to make her scowl at him.

Buggy makes her feel free. Her home life is stressful. The pressures of upper-crust society and a constant spotlight make her feel trapped. She's not super boisterous in general but she likes the option he gives her. She loves his nose. It makes him unique.

I like to imagine that the Straw Hats have "rescued" her a few times but haven't put it together. They're like "boy it sure is weird that Buggy has kidnapped you six times in the last year..." And she's just like:

[owlixx]

Wii Games List

I had so much fun putting together a list of potential GBA games to play yesterday, that I figured I’d write up all the games I can currently play! Im starting with the Wii games I have physically as well as digitally on my Wii U. RIP eshop, although I am the kind of person who is not super affected by it, let’s just say.

This is mostly self indulgent and just for posterity but feel free to provide recommendations.

Physical:

* Mario sonic Olympics - mostly for quick multiplayer

* Wii sports resort - same, pick up and play

* Mario Galaxy 1+2 - currently halfway through each

* mKwii - for cowards who fear modded Mario kart

* Mario sluggers - decent story mode

* Mario strikers charged - still haven’t booted this one up despite loving the GameCube version as a kid

* Skyward sword - I am SO bad but I still want to vanquish this foe one day

* Mario party 8 - every time I play this game, it goes poorly for me, but I still wanna see all the boards

Virtual Console:

* Mortal Kombat Armageddon - this game is so dumb and goofy, haven’t tried this version

* Mk Wii modded - it’ll be a while before I’ve played every track of this

* DKC Returns - I prefer the 3DS version but the multiplayer is only here

* Lost in shadow - Wii only had 3 RPG’s

* Pandoras tower - and this is one of the other 2

* Kirby return to dream land - just beat, maybe hard mode next time

* Kirby epic yarn - just beat, maybe collect everything next time

* Mario sports mix - good for multiplayer

* Super paper Mario - been meaning to try

* Metroid prime trilogy - I love MP1 but stopped on it after losing some progress to space pirates and having to redo backtracking (a double crime) and then just barely started 2 (beat all 3 a few years ago)

* Metroid other m - beat using 360 controller but been meaning to try with real Wii remote

* Pikmin 1+2 - tried 3 but haven’t played 2 since kid and never tried 1

* Poke park - mostly as a joke

* RE4 - I did wanna play/replay RE0-6 before getting 8 and the remakes, and this might be the version of RE4 I most want to play

* Umbrella chronicles - I did get a zapper

* Sin and Punishment 2 - does this work with zapper?

* Xenoblade - I got a good many hours into this one and then stopped AFTER beating a tough boss so I should definitely pick back up, maybe use Wii remote and nunchuck instead of gamepad this time

* Red steel 2 - the premier Wii motion plus game! Besides Wii sports resort and skyward sword

* Excite bots - I hear this one is underrated but haven’t tried yet

* Rhythm heaven fever - I already stan rhythm heaven, just need to play this one more

* Zack and wiki - always heard this was a cute point and click game

* Wii play - played, cute enough

* Wii party - played but not all modes yet

* Boom blox - player and enjoyed, lots of content

* Sonic riders zero gravity - I need to come back and play this on my own sometime

* Sonic colors - despite beating relatively recently, this one is even more fun on real hardware

* Klonoa - definitely play this over the original

* Golden 007 - Ehhh kind of a novelty

* Ghost Squad - zapper game

* Gunblade - zapper game

* Elebits - need to circle back and play on my own, much easier than when I was a kid

* Dokapon kingdom - need to try

* Epic Mickey - need to try

* Dead space extraction - zapper game

* Bomberman land - need to try

* Wii music - lol

* Prince of Persia forgotten sands - maybe after I beat PoP trilogy on PS3

* No more heroes - ehhhh maybe just play PS3 port

* Nerf - zapper game

* Kororinpa 1+2 - need to try 2

* Wario land shake it - I was waiting to beat previous wario lands

* Warioware smooth moves - tried, need to play more

* Brawl - classic

* DK jungle beat - need to try to compare to Mario Galaxy

[zombiee-reviews]

Like I’ve stated previously, this chapter of Home is absolute SHIT.

Sure, the last chapters were garbage too, but this chapter has solely been about coddling Roamer and Rogio and showing us that they have zero consequences. Even dragging Kargo into the bullshit as well.

We all know why Roamer is a warrior, because apparently killing a dog who is retreating and is no longer a viable threat to you, as well as going against your leaders word is something that should be rewarded and not reprimanded. I would have hoped Kique caught on to this eventually, cause you know, he relies on all of us to write and catch plot holes for him. I was hoping Ronja would have a word with him, but nope! She slaps Roamer with a warrior rank and thinks he’s an absolute PERFECT fit for this rank. Okay.

Why in the hell would you want someone like Roamer to be a warrior/fighter for the Tribe. I have YET to see Roamer NOT get his ass kicked, unless he’s attacking someone while they’re not looking, like the coward he actually is. Roamer can’t fight worth an actual damn and if anything, I feel like he isn’t in the right mental state to hold a rank like that. Because obviously he has shown he can’t control himself when an enemy has given up, potentially causing even more problems for the Tribe. But, you do you Kique.

Also of course Saint Rogio gets to keep his precious Baron rank, which he’s yet to even actually earn. Like Roamer, Rogio is a huge coward and prefers to let everyone else do his dirty work while he sits out. Rogio is Kiques biggest self insert, so of course he gets most the praise, even though he’s the biggest douche bag in this story lol.

And yet again we are blessed with paint colors that don’t stand out and are dark af and probably won’t blend well with the mountain terrain.

Im still amazed Rogio hasn’t mentioned ANYTHING about the spirit and how he suddenly has zero trauma to something that almost completely killed him. But poor Rogipoo can’t stand the sight of his red carpet pusher, Ranach. GAH!

My god guys, I’m really trying to keep it together for this chapter LOL.

Spoiling the new paints, before even showing it to the public it seems.

Remember that I talked about How kique spoils the reveals BEFORE IT'S TIME, from this BLOG ;

Whelp, Wanting to state Kiq. update the ref. and a few medallions from Nordguard and already SPOILED what the new paint would be by literally a glimpses.

Already not liking the new paints cause you can BARELY see anything and its really sloppy work.

He could have done a Nordic knotwork paint on them which is both distinctive and pretty cool. I'm a sucker of it's knotwork for being a learning curve and fun as well.

Also noticed most tribes have this gradient color paint going on, which the question implements how they even do a gradient without tampering or muddling the colors. Kique showed at first it was chalk but then now chalk become colored paint in a bowl. Is chalk rare and valued then manual paint making? is it because its longer lasting? anti-smudge?? what?? anyway here be example;

Example of conceptualizing with the inspiration

Since people don't look over the Wix site of Home and if he has unpaid ' volunteers ' this would get in, but the public barely reach the scenes when they obtain the new paint. the public is actually 32 pages away from that reveal on patreon.... SOoooooo 😅 It' just shows the author doesn't care anymore of suspense or caring about his story despite claiming to be.

__________________________________________________________

ALSO, got noted that Roamer became a Warrior and not a Baron no more with no context or reveal yet still has the Baron paint. HIS REVEAL OF CHANGING RANK ALSO HAPPENS 32 PAGES AWAY FROM THE PUBLIC. We all know why his rank was change, after that backlash of him being a backstabbing ( literally ) murderer and was coddled/justified while also disrespecting the leader which is Ronja; his family member he was supposed to care about and rescue but didn't until it was convenient, not a stranger or anything.

and yet....ROGIO GETS TO KEEP HIS BARON RANK FFS cause we can all trust him, it's not like he shows no proof to go against him being a higher rank or anything 😒 🙄

[krissiebucks]

[beevean]

A but of an inconclusive rant that makes more sense in my head.

“Humanization” seems to have become a synonim for “adding positive/likeable traits to a character”...

But it’s not necessarily that?

For example, when I write Hector, I add more negative traits to him. I wrote him being mean to Isaac, aiming at his insecurities when he’s fed up with him. I wrote him being condescending to Rosaly, looking down on her for being too pious for him (he gets better lol). I wrote him having zero empathy for humans at first, not even understanding the concept that children are supposedly innocent. I emphasized how self-centered his heel face turn started out. I keep repeating that I'd love to see more of the coldhearted General Hector who committed war crimes in the name of a genocidial Dark Lord. And I even praised two parts of N!Hector: the fact that he himself burned his own parents, unlike in canon where the animals/demons did it for him, and the fact that he saw humans as animals to be culled, but without a hint of resentment, almost out of innocent pity.

Isn’t that humanization too? Isn’t that fleshing out a character? Or does it count only when it’s time to give an unrepentant manchild of a villain sudden fatherly emotions?

Speaking of Eggman, you know what also counts as humanizing him for me?

Eggman loves amusement parks and circuses. There is no deeper reason for it, no secret childhood trauma. He enjoys creating colorful places and if they can be used to exercise control, all the better. It’s his unique way to shape the world. It’s a character trait that he doesn’t need, but he has it, and it fleshes him out.

And you know what else humanizes him? The Egg Memo where he complains that Maria stole the spotlight from him because she dared to be ill and be killed. He’s jealous and selfish and insensitive and constantly seeking attention - aren’t those human traits too? Can’t they be relatable too, as much as we wouldn’t like to admit it?

Another villain who got humanized in a negative way is Isaac in the MF manga. Once again, I link to my analysis of that scene (bottom of the post) where he killed his own underlings because he wanted to disobey Dracula’s direct orders, all while thinking of himself as his most loyal servant, in a brilliant display of hypocrisy and denial that IMO makes him even more interesting. From the same manga, I also am still not over that one page where he shows fear over being approached by his caretaker (?): however you interpret it, whether it’s a reaction to nearly dying, to losing his master and home, or to being betrayed by Hector, this is a human reaction, albeit a negative one.

On the flip side, what about Sonic? Does Sonic need to be humanized by making him more of a jerk? Or, god forbid, by adding a completely unnecessary moral “dilemma”? Or is the fact that this speedster actually loves sitting down and reading books enough to give him more depth? Or the fact that he loves nature, or the fact that he is both empathetic and has a noticeable ego that sometimes gets him into trouble? I think it is. Sonic is a simple character at his core, but he has so many cute quirks that he ends up being both an inspiration, which is what he’s meant to be, and endearing :)

“Humanization” means writing a character in such a way that they’d feel human, like people you could meet in real life. It doesn’t mean “adding more palatable traits”. Humans are not inherently good, nor they are inherently evil, they are simply complex. You can write the meanest bastard in the world, you can write the goodiest hero with the most unshakeable heart, and if you add extra traits like tastes or quirks, and if you can make them fit with their core characterization, that counts as writing them as human.

[gods-favorite-autistic]

Incorrect Heroes Of Olympus:

(Starting with couples, going into trios, then mixing them all together)

Percy: So are we flirting right now?

Annabeth: I AM LITERALLY SPARRING WITH YOU

Percy: That doesn’t answer my question

-

Will, tending to Nico’s wounds: How would you rate your pain?

Nico: Zero stars. Would NOT recommend.

-

Nico: I prevented a murder today.

Will: Really? How’d you do that?

Nico: Self control.

-

Percy: Am I in trouble?

Annabeth: Take a guess.

Percy: No?

Annabeth: Take another guess.

-

Nico: *Walking in to a room* Sorry I’m late... I was... doing things.

*Sounds of running footsteps progressively getting louder*

Leo: *Out of breath* HE PUSHED ME DOWN THE FUCKIN’ STAIRS.

-

Jason: I know you’re deflecting by making jokes about how hot you are.

Piper: It’s not a joke.

Piper: *sniffles*

Piper: I’m a legit snack.

-

Percy: Remember when you didn't try to solve all your problems with attempted murder?

Nico: Stop romanticizing the past.

-

Leo: I can explain.

Jason: Can you?

Leo: If you give me thirty seconds to think of a lie.

-

Leo: Lol heads up if you try to make a candle with food coloring, the food coloring will just sink to the bottom of the glass, and when the flame eventually reaches the bottom all the food coloring will catch fire and become one giant tall flame that you cannot possibly blow out and the glass will start to crack and then you'll throw your tea on it in a panic and then the extremely hot food coloring will boil and sizzle horribly and then the glass will shatter. Please take my word on this lmfao

Frank: What did you do Leo?

Leo: A MISTAKE

Frank: YOU CAN CONTROL FIRE-

-

Hazel, while making a plan: I was thinking I'd do some magic-

Leo, instantly: You? Magic? Hazel, it says talent show.

-

Jason: Reyna! Reyna! Whaddya call a fish with no eye?

Reyna, not looking up: Myxine Circifrons

Jason:

Jason: fsh

-

Annabeth: This is such a bad idea.

Percy: Then why are you coming along?

Annabeth: One of us need to be able to talk the cops out of arresting us when this inevitably goes wrong.

-

Leo after the ‘saving Nico’ scene: Top 30 reasons why Leo is sorry... Number 5 will surprise you!

Hazel: Top 30 anime deaths. Number One: YOUR FUCKING ASS RIGHT NOW!!!

-

Piper: Ok, maybe playing ‘whose family is most dysfunctional’ wasn’t the best idea we’ve had. Leo’s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can’t get him out...

-

Grover: Are you sure this is the right direction?

Percy: Certainly, I'm as sure as I am smart!

Annabeth: In that case, we're definitely lost.

-

Leo, feral: Here’s a fun Christmas idea. We hang mistletoe, but instead of kissing, you have to FIGHT whoever else is under it.

Jason: Leo no.

Piper: Mistlefoe!

Jason: Please stop encouraging him.

-

Nico: Hey, Frank? Can I get some dating advice?

Frank: Just because I’m with Hazel doesn’t mean I know how I did it.

-

Leo: So, what, now I’m just supposed to do anything that Annabeth does? I mean, what if they jumped off a cliff?

Jason: If Annabeth were to jump off a cliff, she would’ve done her due diligence regarding the height of the cliff, the depth of the water, and the angle of entry, so yes. If you see Annabeth jump off a cliff, by all means, jump off a cliff.

Leo: You jump off a cliff!

Jason: Gladly. Provided Annabeth did first.

Annabeth: Last time I jumped off a cliff I fell into Tartarus so maybe don’t-

-

Reyna: You have to apologize to Will

Nico: Fine.

Nico: 'Unfuck you' or whatever.

-

Piper: We need a distraction.

Jason: Is anyone here good at jumping up and down and making weird noises?

Leo, whispering: My time has come

-

Percy, driving Leo and Piper: So how was your day?

Leo: We almost got surprise adopted!

Percy: What?

Piper: We almost got kidnapped.

Percy: Oh, okay.

Percy: *slams on the breaks* WAIT WHAT?!

-

*The 7 is having dinner together*

Jason: Leo, can you pass the salt?

Leo: *Throws Nico across the table*

-

'Can I copy the homework?'

Frank and Hazel: I can help you with it!

Jason: Yeah, sure.

Piper: Bold of you to assume I did the homework.

Percy, stepson of the teacher: lol nope.

Leo: Wait, we had homework?!?!?!

Nico: *Read 5:55pm*

-

Leo: Everytime I hear someone talking about updog, I’m torn between not wanting to fall for it and wanting to help them complete their joke.

Annabeth: Okay, but what is updog?

Hazel: Updog is a long sausage in a bun, often served with ketchup, mustard, onions, and/or relish.

Frank: Not, that’s a hot dog. An updog is when a new version or patch of an application is released.

Piper: No, that's an update. You’re thinking of the fourth largest city in Sweden.

Percy: Surely, that’s Uppsala, where’s updog is the giant spider in Harry Potter.

Jason: That’s Aragog. Updog is a symbol conventionally used for an arbitrarily small number in analysis proofs.

Nico: You’re thinking of epsilon. Updog is an upward-moving air current.

Leo: No, that’s an updraft. An updog is the modern version of a henway.

Annabeth: What’s a henway??

Leo: Oh, about five pounds.

-

Gaea: Well, aren’t you all a rag-tag group of adventurers with unclear goals and good hearts! Oh, let me guess: you’re out to save the world!

Percy: Well, actually, that sounds like a pretty fair assessment.

Jason: More or less, I guess...

Hazel: That sounds awesome! Let’s do that!

Frank: I’m new here, but I am open to the concept.

Leo: I thought that’s what we were doing, guys, come on!

-

Percy: Croissants: dropped

Frank: Road: works ahead

Piper: BBQ sauce: on my titties

Jason: Shavacado: fre

Leo: Miss Keisha: fuckin dead

Hazel:

Hazel, grumpy: I didn’t understand a single word of that and I hate every single one of you.

-

Percy, walking into their house: Hello, people who do not live here.

Nico: Hey.

Frank: Hi.

Hazel: Hello.

Piper: Hey!

Percy: I gave you the key to my place for emergencies only!

Leo: We were out of Doritos.

-

Piper: Time for plan G.

Annabeth: Don’t you mean plan B?

Piper: No, we tried plan B a long time ago. I had to skip over plan C due to technical difficulties.

Jason: What about plan D?

Piper: Plan D was that desperate disguise attempt half an hour ago.

Hazel: What about plan E?

Piper: I’m hoping not to use it. Leo dies again in plan E.

Nico: I like plan E.

-

Jason: Dumbest scar stories, go!

Percy: I burned my tongue once drinking tea.

Piper: I dropped a hair dryer on my leg once and burned it.

Annabeth: I have a piece of graphite in my leg for accidentally stabbing myself with a pencil in the first grade.

Hazel: I was taking a cup of noodles out of the microwave and spilled it on my hand and I got a really bad burn.

Leo:

Leo: I have emotional scars.

-

Nico: Who the fuck added me to a fucking group chat?

Annabeth: >:O language

Frank: Yeah watch your fucking language

Jason: OKAY WHO TAUGHT FRANK THE FUCK WORD?

Leo: 'The fuck word'.

Hazel: Are you stupid? You guys use the f word all the time

Percy: Oh my god they censored it

Leo: Say fuck, Hazel.

Piper: Do it, Hazel. Say fuck.

-

*Squad reactions to being told ‘I love you’*

Percy: Thanks fam!

Piper: oh no

Frank: *cries* I love you too

Leo: Sounds fake but okay

Hazel: *A flustered mess*

Annabeth: can i get a refund

-

Percy: *Posts a super low-quality image to the group chat*

Nico: If I had a dollar for every pixel in this image, I’d have 15 cents

Percy: If I had a dollar for every ounce of rage I felt in my body after I read this text, I would have enough money to buy a cannon to fire at you

Annabeth: Actually I did the math, Nico would have $225, not $0.15.

Nico: Fam I’m right here....

Piper: If I had a dollar I would buy a can of soda :)

Hazel: while you’re there could you buy me an apply juice please?

Piper: Sorry I only have a dollar

Leo: :(

Jason: Hey I just realized Leo is right, Nico would have $22,500 because it's a dollar for every pixel, not a cent

Hazel: If I had $22,500 I would buy a can of soda and an apply juice

Jason: You can buy anything you want with $22,500

Piper: Yeah and she wants soda and apply juice

Frank: Apply juice to what

Leo: Directly to the forehead

Annabeth: Great chat everyone

[chaoxfix]

16 and/or 27 :3c <- guy who lurks around but is obsessed with ur fics hi

heya ! thanks for the ask :0 <3

16. What is your favorite character (or characters) to write for? Sonic & Tails. ...So basically I have zero self control and just do what I like best in large quantities haha. I also love writing Sally but haven't written her as much bc Archie is a whole can of worms and I like game-Sonic's personality and storylines better than Archie. Which is why my ideal fic would be Sally swapping into Elise's role, which I do have plans to write and have had plans for ages. 27: Are there certain types of writing you won’t do? (style, pov, genre, tropes, etc) hmmmm... I won't do 1st person POV for anything but original works. I also, full stop, won't do gore -- or engage with it, under any circumstance, because I'm the type to get lightheaded just seeing gore or hearing descriptions of a bloody scene ... so having to write it.... would not work well. ^^;; ive passed out multiple times from gorey stories and imagery, it's not fun. even just hearing about something with bodily trauma for longer than a minute or two kind of makes my brain go numb...? if anyone needs a reference for what it feels like to pass out / start to go into shock, i can do that sometime, lol. i also try not to do anything that is too... irl, or diagnosable (?), or genuinely traumatizing, in Sonic's world? If it's real and life-altering or traumatizing and people suffer from it IRL... if it's something that causes real pain and harm and needs diagnosed or treated irl, i wouldn't really want to include it by name in a fic. partly out of respect, if it is not something i face myself, as i wouldnt want to misrepresent it by name (and even if i do face certain things, i also have a hard line for myself about not projecting using fic, because it would be a very bad coping strategy for me). and, more than just out of respect for certain topics, sometimes concepts just feel too heavy for the franchise's bright colors, and if i write about it as matter-of-factly as it deserves in real life... it might feel out of place in sonic's world. for example, i made a post earlier about insecurity vs self loathing vs guarded personalities. i would feel comfortable writing those words and exploring those ideas in fics -- but i would hesitate to name them as, say, an anxiety disorder, depression, or ramifications of child neglect. maybe in an original work it could feel organic if i crafted it that way from the start; but i read and write sonic fics for more lighthearted themes, and explorations of family and friendship and, in general, somewhat lighter and more fantastical and rock-and-roll concepts. so again, it feels too heavy to name some of these directly -- even if in some ways, i still want to explore portions of those heavier concepts, piece by piece.

best example i can give is the reason the word "torture" feels so out of place in the english dub of sonic forces. i'll explore this idea extensively in fics, because now it's part of the lore, and its out-of-placeness makes it something i want to pick at -- but the reason i feel it has to be fixed or altered in some way in order to be palatable is because fundamentally, heavy topics like that feel too big and too real for this franchise. to make them smaller and more sonicified, you have to alter them; make them fantastical and rock-and-roll so they finally fit. so it stops being, "sonic was tortured for 6 months" because blood and chains feel wrong in this series -- and to me, it becomes "sonic was a battery for 6 months" and/or "infinite gave sonic false realities / false projections of his friends for 6 months" because it feels more like it's part of this world. ........or just take it the classic way and say "rouge is just exaggerating because sitting still for 6 months would be torture for sonic"

ah... at this point im definitely rambling -- sorry! ^^;;

thank you for the ask ! <3

[rissynicole]

DTIYS Contest Winners!

I’m still reeling from how much love this DTIYS received, and so thankful for all the amazing people who participated, boosted, and sent me well-wishes following Parade’s 1,000th kudos. Once again, thank you so, so, so much.

I had an incredibly hard time picking winners for this. As in, I sat up in bed last night just clicking through them all, agonizing over which three to choose. They’re all so beautiful, and they all came from sweet, dear friends of mine. I had 10 entries and, more than anything, I just wanted to be able to award something to everyone. 

This is what I eventually decided I wanted to do: just as I said before, I will be choosing three winners, in no particular order. Those winners can request a 1,000—1,200 word one-shot. Anything they want, as long as I’m comfortable with it! However, for all other entries, if you give me a short prompt of your choice, I’ll write a drabble for you! (My drabbles usually go a tad over the usual 100 words).

Just to be clear, this is not a burden for me, and it is something I very much want to do for my friends. It might take me a hot minute to get through everything, but that’s only because I want to make sure I’m not rushing my writing. I’m going to tackle this by first DMing the winners to ask them what they would like me to write for them. Then, once those one-shots are done, I’ll start reaching out to the rest of the contestants to get their prompts.

Alright! I’m going to put this under the cut, because I got rambly. 

Without further ado, here are the winners! 

@kovablue 

(kovablue’s art)

Okay, I’ve absolutely not made it a secret that I adore your art, but I did not expect you to draw something for this DTIYS! Seeing my boys in your style almost made me choke up. They’re positively amazing. I can’t even narrow down what my favorite part of this drawing is. The composition, the colors, the way you drew the planet and galaxy in the background… it’s all so beautiful.

@cozymochi

(cozymochi’s art)

Cozy! I don’t even know what to say. You’ve been such a kind and supportive friend to me for so long. Also, your art is so amazing, it gives me heart palpitations. This one almost did me in lol. It’s absolutely gorgeous, and I can’t stop staring at it. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again, you 100% nailed the expressions on Zim and Dib. As in, you totally understood what I was thinking when I wrote that scene and drew it in the most beautiful way imaginable. I love it so much. 

@rllyaangrlly

(rllyaangrlly’s art)

Brit! My shitposting, zagr-loving, art-drawing, majestic buckaroo. Seeing your picture for this DTIYS seriously made my whole day. I love it to absolute pieces. Every time I zoom in to look at the boys’ faces, I want to start squealing. They look fantastic, and I still can’t get over how Dib’s legs are all pulled up to his chest. Poor guy has zero room in that ship. It’s incredible, and I am beyond grateful for your friendship. You’ve definitely made this fandom a wonderful place to be. 

Honorable Mentions

@0palite

(0palite’s art)

Opal! You were the first entry into this contest, and it really gave me the optimism I needed when I started to let my low self-esteem get the best of me. Seeing this scene drawn in your beautiful style really kept me going, and I absolutely adore it. Thank you so much for being so amazing.

@i-like-pink-lolzz

(i-like-pink-lolzz’s art)

Okay, I know you just drew yours for fun and not for the contest, but I really wanted to include you in the honorable mentions. I know that you really enjoyed Parade, and it really means the world to me. Your drawings, memes, and asks have been such a boon to my confidence lately, and I appreciate it all beyond words. You’re an incredible friend, Pink, and I am endlessly thankful for that.

@poppun-chan

(poppun-chan’s art)

I love seeing your art so much, Poppun. The way you drew the boys was positively adorable, and I’m still not over how soft and pretty the shading is. Thank you so much for drawing them and for being such an amazing friend.

@faithfulwhispers

(faithfulwhisper’s art)

Oh Faith, I’m absolutely in love with Zim and Dib in your style. You just have this way of making Dib look so sweet and charismatic, while Zim always manages to look like a smug little bastard. Even in this scene, you can see those traits shining through, and I think it only manages to add to the resounding message at the end of Parade that, with time and healing, things will be okay for them. This is such a beautiful picture, and your galaxy in the background is one of my favorites out of all the entries. Those shades of red are breathtaking. 

@reptile-ruler

(reptile-ruler’s art)

Your style is so amazing, and I still can’t get over it. The way you drew Zim’s and Dib’s expressions is so sweet, and I keep going back just to look at them. Absolutely lovely. And all the different shades of purple you used are gorgeous! It really makes yours stand out, and I love it so much.

@dana-chan-the-control-brain

(dana-chan-the-control-brain’s art)

I was seriously so thrilled to see that you drew this scene, Dana! I know you’ve been busy, both with fandom projects and irl stuff. It meant the world to me to see this scene in your style! I love the mix of colors you used in this. Seriously, that plum-purple color you used for the galaxy is my favorite color ever. And the way you drew Irk is gorgeous! The rings are perfect, and I think your interpretation of what it looks like is one of my all time favorites. Thank you so much, again. You’re such an amazing friend, and I don’t take that for granted. 

@ittybittybumblebee

(ittybittybumblebee’s art)

Bee! I remember following you ages ago, and seeing your art style change and grow is one of the most inspiring things on my dashboard. I can see your confidence increase, your characters get more and more expressive, and your color choices get more adventurous. This picture is so beautiful, I can’t even nail down just one thing that’s my favorite. The pops of bright colors, the soft shading! It’s all incredible! I love it so much. 

Thank you all, again, everyone. I can’t explain just how much it means to me that I have such amazing friends, readers, and people who fit both those two categories. You all mean the world to me, and I love you so much. 

[nitw]

i've seen some people say that they don't really trust the direction qrow's arc is headed right now, after everything with clover which kinda makes his positive development seem pointless, AND I GET THAT, I DO. but i feel like it's a big misconception so i'd like to voice my thoughts on it. i've talked about this before but:

for the longest time, even before he opened up about it himself, qrow has felt inherently guilty about his presence in other people's lives. his semblance is, of course, something he can't ever ignore or get rid of completely, it's always going to take a toll on him and that's that. but qrow's biggest personal flaw (one that parallels strongly with blake, but that's an analysis for another day lol) is his "it's better to abandon my loved ones than risking their safety even slightly just by being around them" mentality.

qrow loves his family. qrow generally has a lot of love and concern for everyone around him, and he KNOWS there are people who love him, too. but his trauma-induced fear of hurting anything and everything he holds dear gets the better of him. it's easier for him to miss his family and feel guilty that they miss him, than even potentially hurting them for reasons he has zero control over. to qrow, it's just the lesser of 2 evils.

this is something he still has to learn. in volume 6 especially, ruby got him further than ever by angrily encouraging him to stay by their side, and letting them deal with the consequences of whatever might happen. qrow NEEDED the message of "yes, you are loved and appreciated and wanted, and we wouldn't trade your company for anything no matter what" hammered into his brain from arguably his closest relative, and it took a long time, but it helped a lot.

then volume 7 came around. from my perspective; qrow's arc in v7 was less of a confirmation of his positive growth, and more their way of saying he's not finished yet. in the early episodes, he STILL constantly self-deprecates, he STILL clearly feels unsure about working together with everyone. he wasn't completely there yet, he still isn't, and unfortunately, sometimes the only way to bring out a character's true colors is by breaking them. that much can often be said for rwby, at least.

qrow is in a VERY BAD PLACE right now, literally and psychologically. he's determined to break out somehow, and he's planning on getting some totally justified revenge, but i don't think ANY of this will bode well for his state of mind if he insists on doing it alone. thankfully, robyn just happens to be there too, and while she's a bit more down-to-earth than qrow and not fueled by the same kinda rage, they've got a mutual enemy and a wish of escaping. and what do you know, they're starting to learn more about each other and becoming closer friends!

qrow needs to step out of his comfort zone and accept his place in other people's lives, and hearts, once and for all. right now he has the perfect opportunity to prove to himself that he's capable.

qrow's positive development wasn't there for no reason. they wouldn't have a major character go through so much growth for an entire volume, and then make him go through hell at the very end of the next one, for no reason. you don't HAVE to fully trust crwby's intentions or abilities to see that they're obviously Not Done With Qrow! and what they're doing with him in v8 is by far the most interesting. i can't predict everything that's gonna happen, but hey, it wouldn't be a fun story if i could!

[shima-draws]

FINALLY NEW OC TIME BABEY

The boy is Emrys, a prince from the Mirrorplane who is on the run from his own kingdom! The girl is Lacie, an orphan who was raised by a guild that rescued her from a somewhat abusive/manipulative friendship as a child!

More (incredibly long) info about these kiddos under the cut~

Emrys (or Em for short)

Age: 23

Hair color: Golden orange

Eye color: Red

Element: Lightning

Emrys is from the Mirrorplane, the parallel world to ATS. His kingdom is caught in a huge power struggle between all the other kingdoms, and Emrys’ mother, a queen who only seeks power from others, is leading them straight into ruin. Emrys is destined to receive the Crest of the Crowned, which is basically a huge emblem of power, as soon as he’s officially crowned as the king. Except that the queen plans to utilize the emblem’s power to start a grand war, which. Is not good!! The night Emrys finds this out, he plans to escape the kingdom along with his childhood best friend Lixin, a regular human who’s basically being used as a pawn to be married off to Emrys’ younger sister in order to create powerful elemental children. Yikes! Emrys is also engaged to a princess from another kingdom, but it’s an arranged marriage, and he doesn’t have feelings for her (so there’s another good reason for him to leave). Lixin is caught during his escape, and Emrys leaps to his rescue, but in the scuffle things get tense and he accidentally kills the guards sent after them. Hands stained with blood, Emrys stumbles into a portal leading to the other side of the Mirrorplane.

Emrys decides that he might as well stay there since he doesn’t know how to get home and he probably shouldn’t go home--he’ll be safer here, and this way his mother can’t use him to start a war. This goes alright for a couple months as he adapts to a world that isn’t constantly fighting with each other, until he realizes that his mother somehow sent people to come look for him and capture him so he can be dragged back home. He also hears word that Lixin is in this world as well. Emrys goes on the run, never sticking around one place for long, and tries to search for Lixin along the way. This is when he meets Lacie!

Personality traits

• Has a hard time trusting people in general. Refuses to get close to people in fear of them getting hurt. Because he's on the run and is a target he tries to keep to himself. A very lone wolf type. Doesn't want other people to get dragged into his problems so he tries to handle everything alone

• Very quiet, observant, INCREDIBLY intelligent--gets really absorbed in books when given the chance. One of the few times his facade falls and he gets Soft and passionate is when he's immersed in reading/studying. Loves absorbing knowledge from this world since it’s different from the Mirrorplane

• Makes scathing remarks often. Doesn't get riled up even when people tempt him. Is able to keep a very cool head most of the time. When he does get angry he gets STUBBORN. Refuses to let people try to talk to him or calm him down. Brushes people off and ignores attempts at support

• You know that he trusts you when he teases you or pokes fun at you

• Very wary. Always keeps an eye out for an escape route

• Careful around people. Knows his strength so he tries not to hurt others

• Deep down tho he's utterly selfless, unbelievably loyal to the people he cares about, and is a truly kind and generous person. He would sacrifice anything, even himself, to keep his friends safe, and beats himself up constantly if one of them gets hurt.  Once he learns to open himself up to others he becomes Tender and is able to express himself easier. He's truly a gentle person at heart

• Is awful at romance because he has no experience (even being engaged) and gets flustered easily when it comes to anything with romantic intent. This is like the one thing he has zero confidence in. Lacie usually has to take charge in this department because he’s too hesitant and nervous to figure anything out himself, so he tends to follow her lead, which sometimes leads to disaster but they figure things out one step at a time!

• Was attracted to Lacie immediately but didn’t want to get close to her bc he knew she’d get hurt because of him. WELP

•  Develops a huge guilt complex after Lacie loses her arm

Elemental abilities

Lightning elemental: Uses a thin sword/rapier to fight. Is VERY fast and agile. Usually starts by hitting pressure points and jolting them with electricity to numb the nerves. Doesn’t really like using his lightning directly so he tries to stick to the rapier as often as possible

He’s not a huge fan of fighting so he’d rather avoid conflict if necessary (especially after he killed someone on accident before). However he should not be underestimated in battle--he’s been trained how to fight from a young age so he knows what he’s doing. He uses a lot of tactics and smarts to get himself out of sticky situations

Lacie

Age: 21

Hair color: Gray/silver

Eye color: Brown

Element: Metal

Lacie’s parents died when she was very young, so she was sent to an orphanage shortly after. Her parents were bandits, labeled as outlaws, so a lot of the kids teased her and ostracized her. This caused her to hold a grudge against both them and her parents, even though they’d only resorted to thievery to provide for her and themselves. There was, however, one person who reached out to her there--an older girl named Gwendolyn. Gwen was very standoffish and didn’t care what the other children thought of her. She was the first person to treat Lacie normally, so Lacie grew attached to her. However, Gwen used Lacie and treated her as a tool to do what she wanted, but Lacie, too terrified of losing the only ‘friend’ she had, never spoke up about it. Gwen did care about Lacie, and there was a genuine friendship there, but that was overshadowed of her tendency to manipulate Lacie.

Gwen eventually hatched a plan to escape the orphanage and strike out on their own. Lacie agreed and together they snuck out in the middle of the night. (Sounds familiar? Wow, parallels!) The next day, Gwen tried to steal from a person in town, which ended up being a member of the guild nearby. Gwen managed to get to Lacie before getting caught and shoved the stolen items onto her, making her a target. Lacie realized how awful this was and finally gathered the courage to yell at Gwen. The guild member caught up, saw their interaction, and took Gwen in for questioning. He escorted Lacie to the guild, where she was pretty much adopted by the members.

Lacie grew up with the guild and learned compassion and how to forgive her parents. As an adult she’s a very kind, friendly and confident person. She is still burdened by her past but she tries not to let it get to her. 

Personality traits

• Not the most polite person since she doesn't really have a filter

• VERY curious. Somewhat naive. Asks a lot of bugging questions if she doesn't know something

• Hot-headed and stubborn. Gets riled up easily, but can control herself when she's angry. Argues a lot but isn't fond of it

• In reality, a very kind person who cares for her friends and would do anything to protect her family. Spirited and determined

• Can be kind of silly, especially when she's trying to cheer others up. Emrys finds her amusing and calls her a dork

• A leader type character...one that can take charge of the situation when everybody else is losing their heads

• Willing to step out of her comfort zone and dive into new adventures without hesitation. She lives for the thrill. Is spontaneous and willing to take risks/chances. Drags Emrys into her fun a lot bc he’s so sheltered as a prince lmao

• Self confident on the outside, insecure in reality (a lot of this comes from the emotional abuse she went through as a kid). But not enough that it's crushing--just enough to make her second guess things sometimes, ESPECIALLY when it comes to Emrys because he's a rubix cube of emotions and she's always afraid of overstepping her boundaries--this is only when she finds out more about him tho. She doesn't mind being an ass to him when they first met because he’s kind of a jerk so her first instinct is to lash out at him

• Isn't necessarily a rule breaker until it's brought up, and then she gets excited about doing daring things. Is almost too enthusiastic about it sometimes

Elemental abilities

Metal elemental: Uses throwing knives infused with magic to fight. Being a metal elemental, she’s able to control their trajectory and can toss them around and have them zip right back to her like boomerangs. She mostly uses these to unbalance enemies and strike them hard enough that they get too dizzy to stand. After she loses her arm, she also utilizes the metal it’s made out of to temporarily transform it into usable weapons.

She’s fine with fighting and is hasty enough to throw herself into battle without thinking, but is fine with peace talks most of the time. 

AND NOW onto how these two cuties meet ;)

If it weren’t obvious by now Emrys is a loner and therefore hates guilds and being associated with them. So naturally, after running into Lacie, he treats her with a lot of attitude and snark, which she retaliates against. After Lacie helps him chase off a couple thugs that he stole stolen goods back from (not the people actually chasing him), she somehow coerces him into the guild for a couple days, and he’s unsettled yet warmed by the friendly atmosphere. Emrys eventually admits he has to stick around town for a while to make some money, so Lacie offers to help him out by going out on official guild missions. Emrys is like I don’t need or want your help and she’s like alright fine then try making money on your own, guild missions pay WAY better and you can’t do one without an official member escort. So he’s like. Jesus fine okay I’ll go on the damn mission with you LOL

They go on a couple missions together and start getting close. Emrys is like oh no this is not what I want so he panics and tries to leave town, but Lacie catches up to him and yells him for leaving without saying anything. Unfortunately during this whole mess the trackers sent to follow Emrys find out where he’s hiding. He and Lacie go out on one last goodbye mission together and they get ambushed. They’re horribly outnumbered and even when Emrys resorts to actually fighting his hardest, Lacie gets terribly injured. Emrys manages to fight off the attackers, getting his hair cut off shorter in the process (which is why it’s shorter and in a cute little half bun in the second pic), but Lacie’s losing so much blood at this point--so he stumbles into the closest building in the closest town and GUESS WHO’S IT IS.

YEAH. IT’S THE ROBO FAM!! (Take note that this is like, 2-3 years after they return from the Mirrorplane themselves, so they’re around 25 at this point.)

Elias and Gifre are enjoying a nice evening prosthetic check date when Emrys stumbles into the mechanic shop, covered in Lacie’s blood, and begs for help before passing out. Both of them go OH SHIT and immediately leap to the rescue. As Elias, Gi-bot, Ava and Ignis (who were called in) work on patching up Lacie’s wounds, Elias realizes that her arm is too far gone to be saved. And this is kind of a sad moment for him since you know. He also lost his arm. So he can relate. Ava’s like you’ll just have to make her the best goddamn prosthetic in the world then and he’s like alright yeah, so they have to remove Lacie’s left arm and it’s. Not pretty.

Emrys wakes up several hours later to find that Gifre treated his wounds. When he asks where Lacie is and Gifre shows him, he immediately breaks down, because she got hurt SO badly because of him and this is why he didn’t want to get close to her in the first place. He laments over dragging her into his mess, and Gifre gives him a nice long Pep Talk, coming from a similar situation with dragging Elias into his personal issues with Python’s Blood. It helps a little, but Gifre can tell Em’s gonna be blaming himself for this for a WHILE (hence the guilt complex comment).

As Lacie recovers and gets used to her new prosthetic (and keeps smacking Emrys whenever he looks guilty about it), the two of them become closer despite Emrys’ attempts not to--but Lacie is stubborn and refuses to let him distance himself. They also get really close and bond a lot with the robo fam, having bunked with them for a while. The main part of the story is just these domesticity moments with the robo fam and their two new dysfunctional houseguests LOL

Eventually Emrys does find Lixin and decides to return to the Mirrorplane to sort things out with his mother, and that brings up a whole bunch of crazy drama, but the robo fam and Lacie come with him (and by that point he’s gone Full Tender and leans on them a lot for support so it’s NICE and CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT), so things get sorted out one way or another. There is a point where he and Lacie have a huge fight because Lacie...finds out something about the Mirrorplane that she does not like, and it nearly shatters her entire relationship with Em, so that’s a big oof. But they get it all sorted out and it’s fine. The reason why their fight hurts even worse is because at this point they’re full on in love with each other but are both too awful at romance to actually say anything. They’re stupid and they can’t communicate and I love them

Yes they end up together because *points at self* I’m a hopeless romantic loser. Lacie becomes a princess of the Mirrorplane which is WEIRD as hell to her but she gets used to it. Also they actually don’t stay there, Emrys hands the kingdom over to his younger sister, who’s always been better at handling royal affairs, and comes back to the regular verse with Lacie to live with her there. They get a house in Spinel Town near the robo fam and LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER THE END

[spoondrifts]

long post ahead I'm sorry-

crack au where Jonah Magnus is a good guy but everything keeps going wrong and he spends all of his time running around trying to stop his employees from diving headfirst into their Fuck Up™ of the week

in this au Jonah is almost entirely incompetent but he's got the exasperated parent thing down enough to make up for his lack of braincells

he's also at least 7% dumber than he is in canon

s1 Jon: please call pest control there are so many worms

s1 Elias: I already did

Jon: and??

Elias: they ate them

Jon: the worms?

Elias: the pest control guys. the worms ate them

Elias spends the entirety of season 2 desperately trying to convince Jon that none of them killed Gertrude (in this au Gertrude just had a stroke or something in the tunnels). Elias stops Jon from destroying the table but a week later something heavy falls on it and the NotThem escapes anyway. Elias bashes in Leitner's head with a pipe after mistaking him for the monster and Jon gets framed.

now Elias has to convince this hunter that Jon is innocent while Jon runs around and harasses various fear avatars (who are all very amused with Elias' wayward Archivist). Jon assumes Elias knows nothing about all this bullshit because Elias is just his weird and uptight boss who accidentally killed someone, he can't possibly know that there are literally fear gods ruling over them

olive ⚰ has named the group 'Avatars ✨'

JMagnus 👀: Jude please don't hurt him. I'll explain everything when he gets back to the Institute.

🔥: too late

JMagnus 👀: What?

🔥: too late

🔥: burned him

[JMagnus 👀 is typing]

JMagnus 👀: Where is he now.

🔥: going to mike

JMagnus 👀: Mike Crew???

🔥: ya

Elias RACES to Mike's house but he. he fucking misses them. the Beholding helpfully tells him that they're all going back to the Institute so Basira and Daisy can interrogate him, which isn't ideal, he'd really like to not go to jail, so he drafts up an employment contract on the way back and barely manages to escape the whole thing with his life intact.

then he explains everything to Jon because if Jon is going to end up being the Archivist, being uninformed won't do. Jon becomes the Archivist completely on accident and Elias is desperately trying to make all of this work because, haha, the Unknowing is coming up, and Elias is not in the fucking mood to deal with clowns.

olive ⚰ has named the group 'all that is terror uwu'

spidey🕸: lmfaooo jonah how do you make an archivist on accident

JMagnus 👀: He stumbled into it. All I can do now is ensure he doesn't die.

JMagnus 👀: Or get further injured by the rest of you.

🔥: woops

🎭: hEy gUyS lOnG tiMe nO sEe

🎭: gEt iT eLiAs

🎭: sEe

JMagnus 👀: Beholding puns are not amusing from a manifestation of the Stranger.

🎭 has named the group 'eLiAs bE niCe tO niKoLa cHaLlEnGe'

🔥: haha

spidey🕸: I'm sure Nikola will be on her best behavior

🎭: yEaH i wOnT kiDnAp yOuR aRcHiViSt

[JMagnus 👀 is typing]

mike n ike: hey guys what'd I miss

🔥: arent you dead

mike n ike: yeh but I came back

JMagnus 👀: NIKOLA ORSINOV WHERE IS JONATHAN SIMS

🔥: can't you see haha

mike n ike: heh "see"

JMagnus 👀: NIKOLA

spidey🕸: wow he must be pissed

spidey🕸: he left out the punctuation

JMagnus 👀: I WILL BREAK ALL OF YOUR PLASTIC BONES WHERE'S MY ARCHIVIST

🎭 has left the chat.

JMagnus 👀: what the FUCK

since he's still a coward Elias sends Michael to go fetch Jon, only finding out after the fact that he very nearly almost signed Jon's death warrant. Elias is now speedrunning Jon's development because fuck the Unknowing is coming up really quickly and Tim is a self destructive mess and Melanie keeps trying to stab Elias and Martin is a pining idiot and goddammit he didn't sign up for this

Elias prepares Jon the best he can for the Unknowing, because even though he knows the ritual will fail, the Circus can still cause a considerable amount of damage and he needs them out of the way.

the Unknowing happens. Jon ends up in a wack ass coma, Tim is dead, Daisy's in the coffin, and Basira is starting to look like the better choice of Archivist because jesus christ Jon has no self preservation instinct. Elias doesn't get arrested this time around but his ex husband starts coming by the Institute and fucking with all his employees. and the Flesh is attacking. jesus. goddamn.

olive ⚰ has named the group 'bully elias'

JMagnus 👀: Why are you all so mean to me? I'm arguably the nicest one here.

🔥: ur joking right

Peter Lukas: you're not nice you didn't buy me an anniversary gift 😢😢😢

JMagnus 👀: I was busy.

Peter Lukas: doing what

JMagnus 👀: Stopping the Flesh from destroying my Institute. Besides, you didn't remember my birthday.

Peter Lukas: you're 200 years old how could I remember 😓

helen!!!!!: We All Know I'm The Nicest One Here!!

JMagnus 👀: How did you make your text that colorful?

helen!!!!!: IDK

JMagnus 👀: Liar.

helen!!!!!: That's Literally My Job

olive ⚰: hey eli your archivist just woke up I think

🔥: ew why

helen!!!!!: How Delightful!! Maybe I'll Throw Him A Glad You're Alive Party!!

olive ⚰: should we invite him to this chat since he's an avatar now

Peter Lukas: no 🙅 🚫❌

Peter Lukas: I hate archivists 😤😤

olive ⚰: still mad about gertrude huh

🔥: were all still mad about gertrude

🔥: but jons fine once you burn some manners into him

JMagnus 👀: Can you all please stop hurting Jon? Or talking about hurting him? I would like my Archivist to not acquire any more scars.

🔥: damn

Peter Lukas: damn 😔

Elias keeps trying to teach Jon how to pick certain victims to feed off of because personally he has no qualms about feeding from innocents but Jon!! actually trusts him!!! so Elias doesn't want to push Jon into making decisions that will offend his moral sensitivities.

things are actually going okay for a while. Elias starts going home at a reasonable time in the evenings and Jon is actually getting some sleep. and then-

Elias is having a nice dream about Peter trying to fish Simon Fairchild out of a sky filled with eyes when he abruptly sits up in bed, wide awake.

"Ah, fuck," he says to Peter, who is laying on the floor where it is Lonelier™. "Jon's doing something stupid. I Know it."

Peter's mumbled "isn't he always" goes unnoticed as Elias hurries to the Institute, where he finds a fucking rib on Jon's desk and the coffin in the middle of the room.

Peter Lukas has named the chat 'archivists ruin my sleep schedule and my sex life'

JMagnus 👀: What the fuck do I do?? I can't go into the Buried! Why is Jon so stupid? I didn't know he had zero braincells when I hired him!

🔥: ngl why havent you fired him yet

JMagnus 👀: Beholding won't let me. We're all bound to the Institute.

🔥: F

JMagnus 👀: Why are there no Buried avatars in here? Please someone help me.

mike n ike: lol the buried is gross why would anyone go down there

spidey🕸: does he have an anchor?

[JMagnus 👀 sent an image]

🔥: is that a fucking rib

spidey🕸: wow that's not a good anchor at all

spidey🕸: he needs someone he loves

JMagnus 👀: Thanks. Gtg.

spidey🕸: np

🔥: are we not going to talk about his rib

🔥: how the fuck did he get that out of his body

🔥: yall

🔥: YALL

it takes three days for Elias to find Martin.

"Please tell me why the fuck you're dabbling in the Lonely," Elias says as Martin steps sheepishly out of the fog.

"Ah. Well. Jon can't See into it very well and sometimes we like to spice up our se-"

"Stop before I have to gouge my eyes out again."

"A-Again-?"

Elias drags Martin back to the Institute. Martin starts setting tapes on the coffin because "Jon loves these" and Elias starts bashing his head into the wall.

Jon climbs out of the coffin with Daisy and Elias almost considers locking Jon in his office so the damn archivist can't do anything else ridiculous. instead, Elias very calmly takes Jon by the shoulders, and shakes him like a rag doll.

"Stop fucking with entities, you stupid, stupid man," Elias says, shaking Jon more viciously now.

after several hours of breathing exercises Elias returns to his house and doesn't take his Sight off of Jon for the rest of the night, which is a fun experience for Peter when he wakes up and finds Elias' bloodshot eyes staring directly at him in the morning.

JMagnus 👀 added Daisy to 'archivists ruin my sleep schedule and my sex life'

Peter Lukas has named the chat 'archivist hate club'

JMagnus 👀 has named the chat 'shut up peter'

Peter Lukas has named the chat 'you love jon more than me'

JMagnus 👀 has named the chat 'I don't love either of you I'm heartless'

Peter Lukas has named the chat 'I want a divorce'

spidey🕸: jeez take your marital dispute elsewhere

spidey🕸 has named the chat 'lonelyeyes dni'

Daisy: wtf is this

mike n ike: it's a chat for avatars

mike n ike: and ex avatars ig

Daisy: didn't I kill you

mike n ike: yea

JMagnus 👀: Hello, Daisy. Welcome to the group chat.

Daisy: why is Jon not in here

Peter Lukas: because I hate him 😁

spidey🕸: Elias talks mad shit in here and Jon would get offended

Daisy: if you talk bad about Jon I'll rip your throat out

Daisy: :)

JMagnus 👀: Noted.

mike n ike: he's kinda rude tho

Daisy: I've killed you once

Elias' only goal now is to keep Jon and his assistants from pulling any more wild stunts without his supervision. his renewed involvement with the archival staff results in a few things he'd hoped to avoid: drink invites, physical contact (Martin is surprisingly quick to start hugging Elias once he realizes Elias won't stop him), and- shudder -feelings. because Elias genuinely cares about his staff and doesn't want any harm to befall them. especially Jon. Jon is his Archivist, the only one to ever succeed like this, and Elias will be damned if he lets anything happen to him.

"Why do you care?" Jon asks, once, compulsion thrumming like static on his tongue. "About us, I mean. I would've assumed you'd want to perform the Beholding's ritual."

Jonah Magnus attempted the Watcher's Crown once, when he was young and new. he'd brought his patron close, but not all the way through, and the backlash of power killed all the inmates at Millbank and severely crippled Jonah's connection to the Eye for months afterward. he grew to assume that the Beholding simply preferred the world as it was--ripe with fear for watching. it didn't need a ritual.

he instead dedicated himself to growing stronger, cultivating his Institute of knowledge, his stronghold. if he tore out a few people's eyes when he got too old, then, well, collateral. but he doesn't want the world to end, and knows now that no ritual will ever succeed unless it brings in all the Powers at once. and he doesn't want that either.

it's concerning to him that Jon seems to be collecting marks regardless. the only ones he's missing are the Dark and the Lonely, and Elias is determined to keep it that way.

he explains all of this to Jon who, to his credit, takes it pretty well. Jon is fascinated with historic life and Elias spends some time simply recounting tales of his youth, when he still bore the name Magnus.

they bond. it's good.

and one day Basira does a little too much research and discovers the dark sun waiting in Ny Alesund. she insists they need to go and see what's left of the People's Church, they need to ensure everything is taken care of. Jon is rather insistent too. and Elias wouldn't have been inclined to let them go, except Peter was finally home after weeks at sea, and it wasn't like Jon was defenseless, he could call Elias if anything went wrong...

so, very reluctantly, Elias gives them the all clear. Basira, Jon, and Martin head north, and Elias almost forgets they've gone when he arrives home and Peter already has dinner prepared.

Jon comes back marked by the Dark.

Elias curses himself, over and over, for being foolish enough to let them go, for not keeping a closer eye on them. he knows the ritual won't work unless a certain incantation is spoken, so he'll just have to keep world-ending written chants away from Jon. easy. and it's not like Jon will even get marked by the Lonely. Peter wouldn't.

(but Martin doesn't have the same level of control, and sometimes...)

it's an accident. Martin and Jon are testing it, pushing the boundaries, when Martin pulls them both into the Lonely. Elias threatens divorce until Peter caves and fetches them, but it's too late. Jon has been marked by all fourteen Powers.

Elias tells him, and warns him to check everything he reads.

helen!!!!! has named the chat 'apocalypse babey'

JMagnus 👀: How are you doing that?

JMagnus 👀: And the apocalypse is not imminent. I have the situation under control.

olive ⚰: ha yeah

JMagnus 👀: What do you mean by that?

olive ⚰: nothing

JMagnus 👀: Well, now I certainly think it's something.

olive ⚰: it's just

olive ⚰: don't you think it's kinda weird that @spidey🕸 has been offline for so long

🔥: thats weird shes always online

JMagnus 👀: Oliver, what are you implying?

olive ⚰: idk

olive ⚰: just weird, that's all

🔥: never good when the spiders are quiet

olive ⚰: hear hear

Elias gets a sinking feeling in his stomach, and beside him, Peter looks alarmed. meanwhile, in his flat with Martin making tea in the other room, Jon has a statement clutched in his grasp.

Hello, Jon.

I would apologize for the deception, but I'm afraid that's quite what I'm good at. I'm not one to monologue, that's more Jonah's shtick, so shall we get on with things?

I admit I underestimated Jonah Magnus. He's still remarkably easy to manipulate, but when he abandoned the Watcher's Crown ritual I knew I would have to take a different approach. The Mother is not so satisfied with the world as she may have insinuated. It is our turn to rise, Jon.

At the age of eight, you were marked by us. We sent you to the Magnus Institute in the hopes that a new Archivist would rekindle Jonah's desire to end the world. Unfortunately, it seemed as though he grew fond of you, and so we brought in a new plan. We marked you. One fear at a time. Jonah gave an admirable attempt at protecting you, but ultimately, he is an incompetent old fool, and I am a Weaver. Even Jonah Magnus dances to invisible strings.

Everyone underestimates a spider until it bites. Poison is poison, Jon, regardless of the medium in which it is served.

You will be safe in this new world. Martin, too. Perhaps even Jonah and his Lukas, if the Mother deems them worthy.

Now, please repeat after me...

Jon reads the ink scratched words, eyes welling up with tears and hands trembling, as thunder crashes outside and a howling gale picks up beyond the windows. Martin is shouting something, there's the crawling press of Elias' gaze as it rests heavy behind Jon, a silent observer. He can feel Elias' soothing presence, cool and calm in the raging storm.

Elias is still watching out for him.

Strings are wrapped around his wrists, jerking his arms up in a poor mockery of religious regard, strange hysterical laughter clawing out from his throat.

Jon's tears run red. Somewhere, Elias is still watching.

The door opens.

[sebbytrash]

Through His Eyes - Part Eighteen

Summary - Bucky arrives at the compound to start afresh but you and him have a somewhat colorful past, colorful being that you met him once before as The Winter Soldier and it did not go well. New beginnings, yeah? If you can learn to forgive.

Pairing - Bucky x Reader

Warnings -   Angst, denial, self loating, all the sad stuff guys. Also, weird breakfast habits courtesy of one Clint Barton

A/N - Hi, it’s me, trying not to act on the need to reintroduce myself here lol. Anyways, sorry its been forever, again. I fix? Feedback loved and appreciated. <3 HUGE thank you to my other half @manawhaat​ for taking my scraps and forcing me to do better. I love you. 

Through His Eyes Masterlist

"Auntie Mallow, what happened to your face?" Nate asks as soon as he spies you from his place at the kitchen table, running over to tackle hug you. "Were you attacked? Was it by Ninjas? Did you kick butt?" 

"Woah, woah, one question at a time, little man," you say, and then pretend whisper, "Twelve of them, butts all kicked."

"Cool!" He shouts, disappearing into the house with a few karate chops.

"Yeah, he's going through a Ninja phase at the moment. He's gonna be dining out on that story for a week." Laura explains, a cup of cocoa already in your hand and hers giving your bruise a once over, a fond smile at the edge of her lips. 

"Training accident with Steve. Nothing exciting." She hugs you anyway, warm and kind and everything you need. Laura and her magical hugs, they always soften the edges of even the sharpest of pains. It's why Sam so often referred to her as Mother of All, because she just made you feel seen, loved. 

"I'll be upstairs putting the monsters to bed. Shout if you need me." She gives Clint a kiss on the cheek on her way past and his eyes linger on her a little longer as she leaves. Your spine aches from the way he looks at her, a lifetime of love poured in a single glance. 

He turns back to you, looks at you in an entirely different kinda way but it doesn't make you ache any less, you wonder if your story is leaking out of your eyes like a kaleidoscope of words and feelings, projected for any and all to see. Laid bare in look alone. He looks at you long enough for you to regret coming, not wanting to deal with any of the mess you'd created just yet, but he surprises you by instead asking, "You hungry?" 

He makes you a burger that you readily inhale and then realise just how long it had been since you'd eaten. Clint asks nothing, expects nothing, simply fills your belly and earns a few shaky laughs before ushering you to the barn where a warm bed was waiting. 

"This place looks a lot nicer than the last time I stayed here." You smile at the memory and he rolls his eyes back.

"Well, we had some time to convert it to a guesthouse. Not like the last time you and Sam showed up, drank the entire contents of my booze cabinet and passed out in the field." He hugs you again and backs up towards the door, "You're lucky I dragged your asses in here instead of letting you wake up a few fingers short." 

“My fingers are grateful.” You laugh, and wiggle them a little, then add, “My back, not so much.”

“Goodnight, marshmallow.”

“Goodnight Clint.” 

You wait till he leaves before letting the smile slide right off your face, exhaustion tugging on your bones with weary determination that you're almost grateful for. It means, if nothing else, that sleep might come easy and the pain might subside even for a few hours. You change into the clothes Clint loaned you, sweats and an old S.H.I.E.L.D t-shirt, and dump your stuff on the chair. You fish your phone out of your pocket to send Sam a quick text but realise the battery is dead. Well, if you weren't in trouble before, you sure are now. Tomorrow's problem, you suppose, before sliding into the lavender fresh bed and curling up on your side. Counting your blinks and willing the day to end, desperately trying not to notice how much you miss his scent on your sheets.

When sleep finds you, it comes armed with weapons of anguish laden eyes or the defeated sigh of your name, and your heart tears itself in two when the sighs turn silent. It's a punishment, you think, when you wake that morning no longer sure if you can stand to lose him from your dreams, too. You’ve lost most of the skin around your thumb nail by the time you work up the energy to go to the house, the blood that leaks out of the worried away skin is like a physical representation of your heart. You hate it.

You don’t. 

The kitchen is unusually silent when you enter and you wonder how long you spent avoiding leaving your bed when you spot Clint at the counter, eating happily, but horribly, from his bowl. He smiles and tips his spoon, then tips it towards the empty bowl and cereal packets waiting on the counter for you. A cereal buffet. 

“Mornin’,” you say, pouring out the sugariest one you can find, “Is that...is that all the cereals in one bowl?”

“Yup,” he grins, “Laura and the kids are away to swim in the lake, so I get to do this.” He scoops a mishmash onto his spoon and has the indecency to enjoy it. Disgusting. 

“That is… honestly, I don’t even have words.” You do everything you can not to stare at the grey looking milk that is swirling around in his house of horrors of a bowl. 

He fills in the silence with some nonsense, a little laughter and a tale or two about the kids, letting you shake off the sleep, and the dreams, and finish your cereal before he pops the bubble. You love him for it, and hate him for it. A theme, it seems. 

“So…” He begins, eyebrows raised in a little ‘tell me’ motion. 

“So,” you say, and nothing more. 

“Steve called.” That didn’t take long.

“Of course he did.” 

“He was worried.” He says, and then adds, not unkindly, “Sam was, too. Apparently, you left without any heads up.” 

You huff, “Well, I’m grown. I do what I want.” You throw in a pout for good measure. 

“And that means you couldn’t reply to a text?” 

You tuck your shoulders at that. “I, uh, didn’t exactly bring a charger.” You hold out the offending item and he sighs, but says nothing, simply takes your phone from you and plugs it into a waiting wire beside him. 

“Right.” He waits, knowing your little pout is for show, until the scowl slips into something else. “You wanna tell me about him.” 

And so you do, how much you hated him, and then how much you wanted to hate him, and then how much you didn’t hate him at all. 

He lets you pour it all out, lets you drain every last drop of guilt and whisper every unchecked secret, the words burst from within that pressure cooker inside your chest. It hurts so much to bare yourself like this that you expect to look down and see blood seeping from a hole in your chest. Instead, you see only granite countertops and blurry hands. 

"So, I ended it." You say, flattening your hands on your knees so you don't have to see them shake, see the physical manifestation of your very bad decision making. "It's for the best." 

"Is it?" Clint asks plainly. "For him, or for you?" 

"What do you mean?" You frown, his words making the hairs on your arms stand up, your body one step ahead as your mind fights to catch up.

"Ok kid, I'm gonna level with you, yeah?" He fixes you with a look that feels very Dad-Like and you bite back a little smile, despite the heavy tone. "I don't think it's a coincidence that you came here, to me, the only other person who might have the slightest inkling what it might feel like being under someone else's control." 

"I…," You begin, and then snap your mouth closed as the words settle over you. Was he right? Was it intentional, you wonder, to seek out Clint? No, no...

"You just live the furthest away." You scoff, but not with much luster, doubt creeping in over that wallowing fog. 

"You're not running away, kid." He says, confidently, "You're looking for answers." 

You consider that for a moment, wonder if there was some remaining strand of hope left in the burnt out tapestry of your want, but you know that even that strand is not enough.

"There are no answers you can give that will fix this." You say sadly, resolutely. 

"Why don't you try me?" He offers, reaching out to stop your hands from worrying away the skin around your nails again. Something you hadn't even noticed you were doing. 

"I don't think I have any questions?" Even to your own ears, you don’t sound sure. He simply looks at you a little longer, waiting. “Fine, maybe...maybe, just one.” He nods for you to continue. “How did you face Nat, you know, after Loki?”

“After I tried to kill her, you mean?” He supplies helpfully, face graced with that confident little smirk that never really leaves, refusing to balk at it like any sane person should. 

“Well...yeah.” You admit, trying not to cringe at your cavalier questioning. This was his idea, after all.  

“I didn’t.” He says, “Not at first anyway, but you know Nat, stubborn as hell and she just outright refused to let me have a pity party.” He laughs, “Monsters and magic, she said to me, we weren’t trained for that. And she was right, nobody is prepared for what we went through, or what he went through.”

It’s true, there’s nothing in the world that can prepare you for something like that, so how can anyone expect a how-to guide on getting over it. Or at least, working through it. You doubt there is a therapist in the world that has much insight on these particular demons, god knows they had enough trouble with yours. 

You think about Clint now, about how very much a team he and Nat are, even within the team itself. It’s like it never happened.

“But don’t you think about it, that day, when you see her?” You ask, subconsciously zeroing in on what you really want to know. There’s something there, you know it, but you're not sure what it is yet. 

“No, not anymore. Maybe initially, but I did the work. Laura helped me work through it, so did Nat.” He looks at you intently, like he just figured something out, frowns a little and tilts his head. “Do you?” 

“Do I what?” You ask, watching his puppy dog tilt with confusion. 

“Do you think about that when you see him?” Oh. Oh, that. 

“No.” You answer honestly, “Not for a while.” It’s the truth. The soldier and Bucky feel so far apart from each other it’s like they’ve never even met. And they haven’t really, you think. One existed exactly over the top of the other. 

“So seeing him, being with him, it doesn’t take you back to that time?” He asks, and it feels like he’s getting at something or putting puzzle pieces together the way he words the question, but it’s inherently still the same one he asked. 

“No... I mean, it did, of course it did, for a long time. But, like you, I did the work.”

It doesn’t even occur to you what Clint is getting at, as you sit there sifting through what he said and how it overlaps with what you know. So when he asks, your heart suspends in place, simply stopping in between beats like there was a limit and you’ve simply reached it.

“Then tell me, why are you so sure he does?” 

“He still has nightmares about me, Clint.” You point out, the fear in his eyes still fresh in your mind, like a brand on your soul you’ll never be rid of. Another stain, another scar. The final matching one. 

“He has one bad dream in the what, months, you’ve been together and you think you know what he needs?” You blink stupidly at him, feeling the pit in your stomach extend just a few more inches, digging itself further into your soul. “Look, kid, if you had come here and told me you didn’t feel a certain way about him, I’d be behind you 100%. But you’re denying yourself something here. Is it complicated? Fuck yes. Look at your life, what part isn’t?”

Complicated, ha! The blood in your vein sings angrily at the notion, that you weren’t over here tearing yourself in two just to protect Bucky from himself, from you. That it wasn’t bigger than complicated. Your feelings, whatever they were, they didn’t matter. What was so difficult to understand in that? It’s exactly the reason you were here and not with Sam, although that decision is becoming stupider by the moment. 

You start to shake your head, ready to say much of the same to Clint when he holds up a hand, not in surrender but to continue. 

“You asked what I see when I look at Nat, now. Well, I see movie nights, and Sal’s pizza, and pissing off Tony and every other memory we’ve made together since then. Isn’t that what you see when you look at Bucky?”

Like a prayer, his name conjures his image in your mind, those smiling ocean eyes, the kind tilt to his smile, the shape of his mouth when he says your name. Not even the ghost of the Soldier hovers. You blink back the tears that are threatening to escape your eyes and answer honestly. “Yes…”

“I’m willing to bet that’s what he sees too.” He smiles at you, sad and sorry. “I remember just after I got back from New York, I had this whole thing about everything being my choice. You know, what missions I went on, when I went on them, what I had to eat - Laura was a saint with that one. There’s just something about it, not being in control of yourself, that unsettles your whole being, right, that every choice I made felt like I was taking something back from Loki. Like I was fighting back even though there was nothing to fight against.” 

You reach out and squeeze his hand, his words dropping like stones in your chest, each one adding to that growing feeling, that one you can’t or won’t name.

“So, if this is about him, about protecting him or whatever it is you think you are doing...don’t. Don’t take that choice from him.”

The stones turn to boulders, drag down in your gut and pull till you might tear at the seams, pull and pull till your nerves are screaming with all that guilt, again, that you carry around and the unending pain that follows it. You knew what it was like, you knew, and yet Clint was right, you’d stolen his choices just like they had, when all he’d ever done was give you them. 

“Just answer this, okay?”

You nod, but you already know what he’s going to ask and you can’t answer him, don’t know how to. Your whole being is centered around this part of you, this shadowed pain that makes up half of your personality. Who were you if not the half broken remains from behind the green door? How can you possibly move past it enough to...feel that way? 

“Do you love him?”

No, you don’t love. You can’t. You like him? Sure. You want him? Absolutely. But love? Unattainable. The ghost of him is there again, sudden and solid, looking at you the way he does, grazing his lips along your cheek that way he does, the gentlest of hands holding you that way he does, loving you that way he does. 

Because he does. He loves you and it's awful and terrifying and euphoric. Suddenly, you can’t stand another minute of this war with yourself, with him, with everyone. The fight was always pointless anyway, you’d lost long ago on the dirty floor of a gym where secrets sprouted from pain and bloomed into hope. The boulders grow wings and they lift, letting your chest fill up with that fear and euphoria, shaking off the shackles of your guilt for the last time. You have your choices, so he should have his, right? 

There they are, those damned butterflies. “Yes.”

Clint smiles, knew the answer the second he laid eyes on your weary face yesterday. “Then let him love you back.”

TAGS: @manawhaat @theashhole @captainrogerss @higherfurtherfasterbby  @peculiar-persephone  @captain-rogers-beard @chrisevansnco @howlingbarnes @poealsobucky @samingtonwilson @vintagevalentinexx @abovethesmokestacks @imhereforbvcky @avengerofyourheart  @stormy-thomas @danijimenezv   @angelicthor   @betheboo55 @palaiasaurus64 @raxacoricofallapatoriuspotter @johnmurphys-sass @katbird787    @sexyvixen7 @jobean12-blog  @justreadingfics @justareader @smoothdogsgirl @theliarone @aikibriarrose @timeladylaurel @badassbakers @earinafae @crushed-pink-petals-writes @tardis-is-mine @httpmcrvel @bucky2-0 @mocking-rain @sociallyimpairedme @jezzula @bless-my-demons @ign-is @indominusregina @-supernatural-coffee-llama @alwayshave-faith   @shifutheshihtzu​ @mizzzpink​ @yknott81​ @haven-in-writing​ @xtina2191​ @reniescarlett​ @notsoprettykitty​ @wickedwerewolf​ @ayeputita​ @tatalopes23​ @pineapplebooboo​ @mizzezm​ @thefridgeismybestie​ @memory-of-a-goldfish​ @supernatural-girl97​ @standing-onthe-edge​ @ruinerofcheese​ @mysweetcookie99​

[incorrect-ikevamp-quotes]

MINNIE SENPAI!! blease do E, I, K, L, N, O, W, Z for Leo? 🥺💖 (i might have gone overboard, so feel free to choose the ones you like the most fhdgk)

Haha, welcome welcome!! I’m honored kouhai, please don’t worry! 💖💖💖 I hope you enjoy this post~ 

Under a cut for length, yet again LOL

Fluffy ABC headcanons listed here for requests!

E = Emotions (how does he express emotion around her?)

Bold of you to insinuate Leonardo has emotions that aren’t imposed against his will HAHAHA. Just kidding, but he does have a hard time not clowning and hiding what he’s feeling. Say it with me kids, repression. That being said, I think he will always have a hard time expressing himself without hesitation in his relationship. His first instinct is to soothe and protect; he doesn’t really know how to put himself first, very few people have ever cared to put him first in his life. One of the hardest things about being capable with the mental acuity of a blade is that everyone just kinda assumes you'll be fine (compounded by the fact that he feels burdensome asking for help). And while there’s no doubt he can take care of himself, everybody needs a daijoubu from time to time ;-;. I like to hope that his MC will be able to see through to the truth of his feelings over time--even if he doesn’t openly enumerate them--before he can smother his emotional needs into silence. Furthermore, I think he would be a little more open/obvious about the depth of his love over time because, at some point, those feelings would accumulate to the point of overflow.

With Leonardo, vulnerability is a slow burn; he will reveal what he’s thinking someday, but today is not that day. Have patience, be gentle with his absolute clown self-neglect, try to meet him halfway; that trust will inspire him to be everything he thought he never could be for someone else. 

In the meantime:

One of the key signals when it comes to Leonardo is to pay attention to when he’s seeking to spoil her. If he’s being extra uwu, that’s a surefire sign he’s Coping™ by channeling those more negative feelings into making her happy. He thinks the best way to handle The Bad Feels and/or concern for her is to redirect that energy into something constructive, and what better outcome could there be than her pouting or giving him that dazzling smile of hers? 

Honestly, with Leonardo, he tends to convert emotion into action--she will know the warmth of his love long before he ever says it out loud. 

He has a hard time articulating his feelings, so asking him to say them outright might be hard on him--it might not be the best immediate go-to. Spoil him out of the blue, instead. She’ll seek him out and just sit in his lap and cuddle for a nap sessh completely without warning, hold him tight so that he knows she’s here no matter what. She’ll indulge his cute needy moments and lounge in bed all morning together, hold his hand first when they go out, take charge in the bedroom; she’ll show him he’s wanted and needed before he can even think to doubt himself. Murmur compliments to him, make him things he loves to eat, give him a back rub unprompted. It’s the simple awareness of what he enjoys and the execution of it before he can prepare that utterly decimates him into revealing the feelings he keeps under tight control. 

He is a lover that thrives on spontaneity and burning, silent consideration for the person he cherishes. The most adorable thing about this is that he is absolutely lost when the same tactic is used against him, he’s utterly defenseless to it!! (look at me. He has zero emotional object permanence. The mere prospect that somebody would worry about him first would send him into shock. And remember: the way people give love can often be the most powerful way they receive it, too.) The sacred texts!! She can use them to make him smile that smile that lets her know he’s an absolute goner for her without the need for words; the smile that says “it will always be you. It can only ever be you.”

When he’s happy, he literally just spoils her with more energy and teasing--expect a lot of wild fun and laughter when he’s in a good mood. He will have exceptionally tender moments now and again (say after a bad nightmare of losing her, for example) where he won’t say anything at all, just holds her close. He needs to know that she’s still here, that she’s okay. It is a rare and huge act of emotional trust; MC’s understanding and her easy proximity in these moments mean the world to him. When he’s distant and evasive, that is the time to give him some space before wedging her way inside. She won’t let him sit and stew in abysmal feelings; he has a bad habit of punishing himself too much or lingering on unhappy moments in his life. Despite how he seems he takes things incredibly seriously--to the point where he exhausts himself. 

When he’s jealous and feeling petulant, he will not hesitate bitch and will get surprisingly grumpy. She’ll coo at him and reassure him that he’s the only one for her, and he’ll calm in the circle of her arms. Fun bonus: he’ll be embarrassed/mortified about being out of control later and she has ENDLESS fun teasing him just a little, even better if he punishes her with a good bangarang. Anger and irritation are emotions he tends to leave be, but if someone directs any kind of threat to MC (or an innocent in general) every trace of his jovial nature dissolves in milliseconds. He is swift, decisive, and deadly when he’s belligerent; he is the last person to push too far. He will often regret it later or worry about scaring MC, but it really does only happen once in a great while. She always reassures him that she knows he only did what he felt he had to in the moment.

You can just hear the Leonardo stan in me, lord jesus

I = Injury (how would he react if she got hurt?)

OH GOD KILL ME FUCKING SOFTLY AUGHGHGHGHGGH

I think it would depend on the injury. If it’s something like a papercut or a scratch, he’ll just be like “yare yare cara mia, be a little more careful next time, yeah?” Will bandage her up and disinfect because he knows enough about medicine to be cautious. Plenty attentive, will probably tease her about being a klutz and/or tell her to ask for help next time. Everything you would expect from Leonardo, essentially; equal parts light-hearted and responsible.

NOW WE GONNA GET SPOICY

If the injury is much more intense--say a broken limb, or deep gashes, so on and so forth--I see Leonardo being very, very grim. His lips would be pursed into a firm line, blanched white from the pressure, and his first step would be to get her out of the danger at any cost to himself. Following his ability to get her to a safe place, he would begin to tend the wound as gently as possible, asking questions to gauge the severity with single-minded concentration. “Where does it hurt? Rate the pain, describe what it feels like. Can you move the injured limb?” He will use whatever he has at his disposal to minimize her suffering if he can’t get her to a doctor immediately. If she requires treatment from someone else, he will be beside himself the entire time; chain-smoking, pacing, running his hands through his hair nonstop. He has ants in his pants until he sees her with color in her face, eyes bright again.

May I offer: They are 100% that couple (in which Leonardo is the one that falls asleep at her bedside) that’s like “you look like shit.” “look who’s talking, stupid.” and they just start laughing, mutually relieved.

During her recovery, he will be incredibly gentle but also subliminally alert. Anything she needs, she gets. If she tries to return to a normal pace of life too fast, he is straight up just picking her up and putting her back in that recovery bed. He ain’t playin’--don’t test him on this. He’s usually pretty easygoing, but he will snap at anyone who isn’t careful with her in this state. He will not take any further risk to her life. (He’s not usually brittle, but under severe conditions he can be.) He’ll tease her from time to time, but it’s much more mild than usual; he’s too consumed with concern to let her get worked up. He’s never really had to deal with a prolonged state of physical helplessness personally, but he’s seen enough in his life to know it can be really taxing on a person’s mind. There will be a thin veneer of calm, only there to keep her relaxed and to ensure the stability of her mental health. He knows that if he shows too much distress, he’s only going to worry her further--and that’s the last thing he wants. He will spend the majority of his time acquiring as many distractions as humanly possible, even if he has to be the distraction; anything to get her mind off of darker things.

When she’s back to normal, he’ll still be on alert for a short while before he goes back to his usual clowning self; might be a little more protective and cautious than usual, or be a little paranoid about the specific thing that caused her harm. (No Leonardo, we need kitchen knives--how else are we going to cut the carrots?? Please relax.) He doesn’t want that kind of heart attack again anytime soon;;;;

Honestly, it’s very likely that MC will have to be the one to remind him that she’s fully recovered--and not quite so fragile--well after she’s returned to the normal pace of life.

K = Kisses (how does he like to kiss her?)

Mah heart, mah soul

When it comes to kisses, Leonardo will vary extensively. Will give her teasing pecks intended to make her grab hold of him and force him to linger, smirking into the kiss as she’s instigated to deepen it. When he’s feeling particularly overwhelmed with feeling--say when he’s jealous or frustrated--his kisses will be dizzying; sucking on her tongue and nipping at her lips, caging her against him as he unleashes all of the desire that was building inside him. The intent will be to drown her in passion. Lazy kisses before/after a nap, where he just wants to revel in the heat of her for a moment--express his affection on a whim--before dozing off. And last, but certainly not least, he will kiss her with the express intent of marking her. Due to his inability refusal to bite her, he seeks to relieve that instinct with hickeys all over her body (most frequently around the chest and neck, sometimes along her thighs and hips when he has fun downtown).

L = Love (how does he show her that he loves her?)

This man is Acts of Service through and through when it comes to showing his love. He is exceptionally observant and sensitive to the feelings of others, so the second he sees her in need he is already seeking an externalized solution. His usual modus operandi is to enact his love as covertly as possible; he doesn’t want her feeling guilty for troubling him. That being said, if he has to be direct--he will be. He won’t ever force her, but he will remind her that he is here and that he wants to help more than anything else. If she needs time on her own he’s happy to give it (even if he pouts and fidgets restlessly the whole time). His most acute expression of love is his reliability: taking care of people is the first way he knows how to express affection.

While that tends to be his primary method, it by no means insinuates that he won’t show affection in other ways. If he teases her, it’s because he wants her attention more than anything but is far too shy to say it directly (is he a middle schooler of a lover? Yes). More to the point, asking for her time and her attention is a way that he expresses love because it means he trusts her enough to know the signs, fulfill those needs, and realize that he meant no harm with his nonsense. Though it may sound odd, his desire to rely on her a little (insert is for me? meme) is his way of showing her he’s letting her in, and that’s a very real form of love considering how Herculean an effort it is for him to rely on someone else. It’s the same reason he will sometimes make his room an even bigger disaster zone than usual. He has every intention of cleaning up after himself, he just wants her to bust in and start fussing over him LMAO  (MC: WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS LEONARDO?! Meanwhile Leonardo, an idiot full of uwus at the sight of his beloved exasperated, sitting in a pile of trash: Just according to keikaku)

As odd as it may sound, it’s almost like a weird reverse damsel in distress sort of dynamic? He carefully constructs situations where she can offer him help with the express purpose (and hope) that she will care enough to bust past his enfeebled defenses. It’s so oddly demure for this enormous punk of a man, but I find it adorable ;-;

Other ways he loves to show how he feels is to take her on trips or on little adventures. One of his favorite things to do is to watch her take in places he knows like the back of his hand--or even places new to him--with all the gleeful excitement of a little kid. It just warms him down to the marrow, and makes him have so much more fun than he ever could alone to see her buzz around nonstop. If he can encourage her to relax and take some time for herself in the process, to live for herself a little (she’s all too giving) then he considers the entire endeavor a success. All the effort is worth it if she can remember their time together with a smile Must You Hurt Me Like This, Leonardo.

One form of love that he will behead me for revealing is that he also sketches her all the time in his notebook, and will look to those little moments he’s captured whenever he’s feeling down or she’s not around. 

He will have times where, if he can’t convey something properly with his actions or through making love, he will level with her. He will take the time to try to explain his feelings with accuracy, and in these moments he is both sincere and heartfelt. While it is a more rare expression of love for him, it is earth shattering when he does. Not only because his feelings run so deep, but also because these moments are unmistakably raw. Leonardo knows that vulnerability is a simultaneous boon and bane; it can inspire so much mutual joy, but it can also mean the exposure of lifelong wounds. It means acknowledging that these feelings are real. Even if she never takes advantage of the truth, he is aware of how precarious that position can be the more intense this love gets. It means facing how hollow he will feel when she's gone--something he works very, very hard to look away from.

(A related addendum because I have brainworms: The reason that people love and trust Leonardo is not primarily based in his intellect, fairly natural charisma, or good looks (though they are very compelling elements of his person). I think what people really see is how--though Leonardo sees through to the truth of peoples’ hearts in seconds--he keeps their secrets and treats them with so much respect/gentleness. It’s this odd capacity to be seen without feeling exposed that makes him such a remarkable and interesting man, and why he grows so close to everyone’s hearts. People feel understood without the need for words, feel cared for without a second thought. That being said, I think he needs someone who is similar. A person who sees all that he is on the surface, but barring that forges deeper still to find and cradle those parts of him that still need so much healing/care.

There’s a reason one of the greatest hits to his heart in his MS--one of the moments MC most powerfully gets through to him--is when she essentially says “Don’t give me that. Nobody ever gets used to loss. When something hurts, it hurts.” Whether she realized it or not, she penetrated straight to his heart with those few words. The truth is often much simpler than we might assume, and no matter how much experience one has with certain emotions--particularly grief and loneliness--no amount of experience makes them hurt any less. We only grow better at concealing or coping with age...)

N = Nightmare (what is his worst fear?)

I have a list (from Comte). I keep them alphabetized.

Jkjk, but if I’m honest I think this man has a good amount of fear inside him. I’d say the highest ones up there would absolutely be losing MC very suddenly, or being the reason--whether directly or indirectly--she gets hurt (like if his familia came after her to get back at him? he would be devastated).

If it is a timeline where he does choose to turn her, he’s beside himself at the prospect of the turning process going horribly wrong. It’s an unpredictable transition, and if she were to come back mentally broken or in constant pain (immortal wounds/aberrant) I think it would really fuck him up emotionally. He would blame himself without a doubt ;-; and that’s assuming she doesn’t hate his ass for the rest of eternity if it does go well (Leonardo I am begging you to use one brain cell)

O = Oddity (what is one quirk he has?) This one’s just a crack hc so if you were taking me seriously for any amt of this post, this is my suggestion that you stop

Leonardo is a man of many idiosyncrasies; among them an incapacity to dance and writing in a mirrored hand. 

Another one is his absolute hatred for mint. One of Comte’s favorite things to do to mess with Leonardo is to stuff the drawers in his desk with peppermint candies to ward off his old friend and make him stop sleeping under his desk (like how people will use salt for demons!). He will also drink mint tea if he’s feeling particularly irritated with Leonardo’s antics, like if he’s received a ton of letters from Leonardo’s familia. Tells him to come to his office and the place is SUFFUSED in the scent of mint. Comte is just sitting at his desk with the stack, wearing that incorrigible look like “If I must suffer, so must you.” 

One time--before MC was aware of this quirk--she had some chocolate that had mint in it after dinner. Leonardo kissed her without knowing (he came in late) and literally died where he was standing; he was biting his tongue to keep from gagging. MC just o: ???? because she’s never seen him make that grimace, especially after sharing a kiss. Comte was in fucking tears laughing at the head of the dining table while Napoleon and Sebastian were both fighting a smile--Arthur was outright wheezing. Isaac, blushing and coughing lightly into his fist, offers the explanation that Leonardo hates mint-flavored things and the scent of it makes him queasy. 

W = Warrior (how does he feel about her fighting? Would he fight for her, beside her, etc?)

Man, this one’s tough, but if I’m honest I think he would be conflicted. On the one hand, he thinks it’s badass and hot as all fuck that she knows how to hold her own in a brawl; he can’t deny it’s sexy and reassuring (he has to resist the urge to gaud her into punching him). But. That knowledge also comes with a lot of concern. Was she in a place or around people that never once looked after her? Or was it a safety precaution? He will think deeply about the implications of her capabilities, and ask about it openly if he can’t deduce the reasons from afar. He will see it as very important information in regards to how to look after her properly.

That being said, I don’t think he would let his MC fight unless there was literally no other conceivable choice (say she was attacked while he wasn’t there or before he could intercept the blow). He would literally rather fall on a sword than see her get hurt. He’s durable and used to pain; he’d rather suffer and heal fast than see her sustain a single scar or bruise. Even if it makes her angry, he’ll take a hit and ask her to stay behind him every single time without fail. He’ll accept her frustration about it and will feel that it is perfectly valid to be annoyed with him. It still won’t make him budge, though. 

Z = Zen (what makes him feel calm?)

Naps and lingering in bed well after morning with MC make this man happier and calmer than anything this world has ever seen. He loves that in those moments they aren’t thinking about anything else but each other, and he can indulge in the certainty of her presence in his life and so close to his heart. He can use the excuse of drowsiness to be tender, making love with a slow, devastating build to pleasure--hand entwined with hers against the sheets. 

Failing that, he goes to things that stimulate his senses to find calm--he can’t really relax if his hands and/or mind aren’t occupied (i.e. cigarillos lmao). It’s why he’s often in the library; he’s always seeking new information and conundrums to sort out mentally if he doesn’t have the energy to go out and about. If he’s in his room he’ll be drafting diagrams, coming up with new concepts and architectural schematics, even making trinkets for MC or fixing something in the mansion. If he needs a change of scene or has the spoons, he’ll make a trip to town to help people with any problems that need solving, or find some excuse to go looking for and tease MC HAHA (he’s a little shit, but he’s our little shit úwù)

[najatheangel]

[🌴] - Tag Game

tagging: @melonmochimoon @mairahcore @dreamyycore @bigbrainenergytingz @soleilsuhh @madeofsaltiness @earth-to-that-asian @fairyjunn @purplepsycho03 @mochiable @trippy-dejun and whoever wants to give it a go!

what day is your birthday? 07/26/00

what’s your favorite color? I love green! My fav color to wear tho is burgundy.

what’s your lucky number? 12

do you have any pets? Yes, I have 2 cats and 1 dog that I love dearly. ☺️❤️

how many pair of shoes you own? Ermm I think 8, but I feel like I only wear 3 pairs of shoes lol.

favorite song? industry baby by lil nas x ft jack harlow & tiger inside by super m.

favorite movie? Hairspray, I’ll never get tired of musicals honestly. 😭✨

what would be your ideal partner? choi san, lee jeno and park chanyeol. Honestly just someone who has goals in life, a passionate lover and who’s committed to me and ONLY ME 100%.

do you want kids? Yess, I’m reaching to 3 or 4🥺

have you gotten in trouble with the law? The worst I got was a car accident so if that counts then yes. 🤦🏾‍♀️

bath or shower? Shower all the way.

how many pillows do you sleep with? Lmaoo 6 and they still somehow fall off the bed.

what you don’t like when your sleeping? When the tv is not on or when my dog is making too much noise.

what do you have for breakfast? normally a granola bar and a cup of grapes or yogurt. If I get fancy, I normally do waffles, bacon and scrambled eggs.

have you ever tried archery? No, but that would be cool.

favorite fruit? blueberries!

favorite swear word? shit or bitch. Especially singing it, idk it’s a good stress relief.

do you have any scars? I still have a lot of dark spots pretty much everywhere from when I fell numerous times at recess as a kid and I have stretch marks on my thighs, belly and arms.

Are you a good liar? No and don’t dare to do it anymore cause my parents wasn’t haven’t it.

what’s your personality? INFJ

innie or outie? innie

right or left handed? Always use my righty.

favorite food? chicken alfredo, but honestly any kind of pasta.

favorite foreign food? I love Indian food and the dish I always eat is saag paneer or chicken curry!

are you clean or messy? Both tbh, but at least my room is clean for now.

most used phrase? bruh, you what? or really?

how long does it take for you to get ready? On a regular hang out day I would say 2 hours, on a fancy day I would say a good 3. Like it’s expensive to be a women, a black one at that. Also I didn’t care at that you know what they say…being fashionably late.

do you talk to yourself? I call it thinking out loud, but yeah lol. 😬

do you sing to yourself? Yes and I even make up my own goofy songs when I have road rage or when I’m doing laundry.

are you a good singer? I’d say I’m decent…, but if y’all heard my voice before I’d let y’all be the judge of that. 😉

are you a gossip? Not gonna lie I like being nosey and sometimes ppl just trust me to tell me their drama, but I never go off telling other ppl. I would say I’m nosey more than a gossip.

do you like long or short hair? Long hair takes too much maintenance so short.

favorite school subject? Anything Science. Bill Nye the science guyyyy.

extrovert or introvert? I’m shy so introvert.

what makes you nervous? Doing presentations, making phone calls and meeting new people. Like ugh the anxiety.

who was your first real crush? this cutie that was in my 8th grade class. All I remember was dancing with him to don’t stop believing and everyone was cheering us on that we were the best couple.

how many piercings do you have? Zero.

how fast can you run? Pretty fast, but not enough to join the Olympics.

what color is your hair? Dark brown, but sometimes it turns a lighter brown in the daylight.

what color are your eyes? The same case with my hair, dark brown.

what makes you angry? A lot of things, when people are disrespectful to the people I love. Racists, homophobics, sexist people, and don’t get me started on fake people Omgahddd I be wanting to call them out on their shit so bad. Ignorant people to top it off people that have no knowledge on a specific topic and they have the nerve to speak on it like just be quiet.

do you like your own name? Yess my grandma came up with up so I’ll always cherish it.

do you want a boy or a girl as a child? Honestly I want both, but if I can have like 2 girls and 1 boy that would be even better. Whatever god will bless me with I’ll be the best damn mother them kids would ever have.

what are your strengths? My creativity for sure, my passion and ambition that helps me reach my goals. Fast learner, reliable, loyal, supportive and the ability to speak my mind more.

what are my weaknesses? I have a hard time controlling my emotions that’s my biggest one. Another one is my lack of patience for certain things especially if it’s something I want. Lastly, sometimes I be too lazy, but I can’t help it I be overworking my self to the point i go over the limit.

what’s the color of your bedspread? A lot of shades of purple, green and pink going on.

color of your room? green and purple

[pixelatedrose]

read this and respond (if you’d like) when you aren’t in the car anymore, i don’t want you to get sick :0 !

you don’t apologize for not be able to write a lot! you didn’t have to answer my ask in the first place but it means a lot to me that you did :) also! i wanna say two things! one, i think i’ve said this before but i really like how you explain things. i’ve tried to learn how to play d&d and i think i’ve got a solid understanding of it, but it’s still hard when people say things like “10 AC”. but i don’t have to worry about that when you explain things cause you sorta dumb it down in a way that doesn’t make me feel dumb.. if that makes sense. two, i love how you showed callahan being healed in your drawing cause it just adds so much more weight to the picture. and i can’t even imagine how that fight was, dancing with death the whole time, that must’ve been so stressful. anyway! that’s about all, but you still have a lot of explaining to do (if you want and when you’re ready) mister >:0 i hope you had a lovely day and you enjoy the rest of your night, love you ro :)) !

1st: dw bout me answerin asks in the car lol I have no fuckin self control sksjshs

2nd: thank you sm m8!!! I know you've mentioned in the past that you don't play d&d or know a ton about it so I try and give little explanations where I can and it's great to hear that I do it in a non-patronizing way

3rd: heheheee okay so imma go into some more detail on the Callahan & Shade training session-

Okay, so.

To understand how we got to this point in time, we have to understand where he was

The party entered the Shadowfell- a mirror plane of existence where everything is contorted and dark and just about everything wants to kill you. This is where we were trying to get to when Callahan first joined the party.

Now Callahan didn't have a full grasp on what the Shadowfell was, really, when he went through the portal. The only one who did was Sylas, and by all the gods did he try to warn us.

Callahan was still so very very unprepared...

The very first fight in the Fell- one of the first battles Callahan has EVER been in in his life- he gets one-shotted by this monster and drops below zero hp.

When you drop below zero hp in d&d, you're Ina state of in between life and death, right on the cusp of either one and a breath's wrong move could send you toppling over the edge. You stay in this state of dying until one of three things happen. 1) you get healed. 2) you succeed three death saves and you stabilize. Or 3) you fail three death saves and you die.

Callahan had succeeded two saves, but he had also failed two. One last roll would have determined his entire fate, and I'm not known for having the best of luck when it comes to dice.

Sylas, our lovely amazing wonderful cleric boy, barely made it in time and slapped Callahan with a healing spell right after the monster died and he regained consciousness.

This...messed him up.

Callahan was absolutely shaken to his core at this very close encounter with death and he did not handle it well.

He got furiously angry, ignoring the fact that it was him that brought him to the Fell, and instead shifting the rage to the rest of the party and blaming them for his being there and, by proxy, his almost dying.

He...said some things...that shouldn't have been said. At least not like that...

And the worst part? It didn't get better. He was fitful and angry and upset at everyone for weeks.

Finally, Haru was done with Callahan's baby-bitchfit and when Callahan snapped at Monty (again), Haru got up and dragged Callahan out into the forest a little ways away from the rest of the party.

And what did he do?

Well he punched him.

Well, more than that. He told Callahan to fight back too. Soon fist-fighting turned into hitting each other with sticks, which turned into Haru having to tackle Callahan to the ground, leaving Cal the perfect opportunity to steal the dagger off his belt and ramming the pommel into his ribs.

Cal would like to say he won that fight. Haru would have something else to say.

After laying there on the ground for a moment, Callahan started to laugh. A sound that Haru had not heard in weeks, and one he didn't know he missed.

Haru explained that he wanted to teach Cal to fight so that what happened with that first monster? Where Cal nearly died?? So that that would never have to happen again.

Something about it- maybe it was something about Haru- calmed Callahan down.

And then it really hit him.

Oh fuck.

I've been a jackass for weeks to literally everyone.

It also started to hit him just how weak he really was in a fight if it ever came down to melee.

So they came back to the party together, Callahan happier than ever with little scrapes and lookin very roughed up (I won't say but the rest of the party did not in fact think they were sparring-)

Callahan apologized to Monty the next morning. The things he said specifically to him were...well...let's just say it hit harder for Monty than the others.

Monty wasn't as quick to forgive and forget. Callahan doesn't blame him.

However, that night Callahan and this new party member- Shade- were on a watch together. Now Shade is a much higher level than everyone else in the party, and is far far more powerful. He's a Hexblade Warlock, but he's also a fallen paladin (or cleric I can't remember) as WELL as a fallen Aasimar (kinda like a fallen angel but watered down). But...also probably a Shadow sorcerer?? Listen Shade is an amalgam of magic and power and idk where all of it comes from-

In any case, Shade is big powerful lad.

Now Cal and Shade are on a watch together, and Shade begins talking about Callahan's magic. He picks up a small opal stone from gauntlets he wears and focuses his magic into it. The opal glows with a black light and swirls with shadows of purple and black. He then hands the opal to Callahan and instructs him to focus his magic like he did.

When he does, the opal changes again, but this time, it swirls with bright, ever-changing array of fantastical colors. A rainbow of things that have never quite been seen before. It's extraordinary.

Shade explains that his own magic is that of the Shadowfell, it's dark and thus his magic is sewn from the shade. And then he explains that he's met other mages- ones with powers of the storm, magic of dragons- but he has never seen someone with magic like Callahan's.

Why?

Well, cause Callahan has pure, unfettered, untained, raw magic inside him.

It's an inferno of unbridled magic and it is completely and utterly entirely untamed. It cannot be controlled and it is as wild as the wind and earth itself. And sometimes, that uncontrollablity lashes out and surges forth, and sometimes things that Callahan doesn't exactly want to happen, happen.

And Callahan listens. And his heart sinks. Uncontrollable? Pure?? Absolute chaotic force of magic??? He can't stand the thought of not having a handle on his magic, because if he can't control it, how the hell is he supposed to use it to protect people??

He expresses this to Shade and the "older" man tells him that he can and should use this to his advantage.

At that moment, Callahan's magic goes wild and he surges. The wooden log they are sitting on, under Callahan's hand it starts to faintly smoke. Callahan doesn't notice, but Shade does. He cuts a small piece of rope and asks Cal to hold it for him. The rope errupts into flames and Callahan drops it in vibrant shock and distress.

Shade calms him down and explains that he can use that. He gets Callahan thinking. Asks how he can use this to help in in battle- he can set things aflame with a touch, for God's sake, what can he do to use that?

And Shade looks at Callahan's small scratches and bruises and scuffs on his clothes and turns and says "I know that look...you've been sparring, haven't you?"

Callahan nods his head. He says that Haru said he'd teach him how to fight, that he wants to- needs to- be stronger.

Shade asks if Callahan would like Shade to help him as well, help him learn how to use his magic to fight.

Callahan says yes.

They start small, Shade borrows Haru's sword in his sleep and gives it to Cal to use. Shade goes through the motions of explaining how he uses his magic to help him wear armor and wield weapons- how he manipulates the pull of power inside him into his blade, into his armor, how he makes them seem lighter and easier to use and wear.

And Callahan follows suit. He goes through the motions of swordplay, focusing and directing his magic into it. And slowly, it seems the blade gets lighter and light in his palm.

After a little while of this, Shade says that he would like to try something to really help Cal in the middle of a real battle. And he summons a demon.

Now, as Shade summons this demon, he explains that he has control over it. That the demon cannot do anything that Shade does not want it to do. The demon is not pleased with this.

In fact, with shadowy chains around its neck and wrists and ankles, it seethes and hisses and spits that it will tear and murder and shred Callahan and Shade to scraps. Shade reassures Callahan that he won't let it kill him. But he asks one last time if Callahan wants to do this.

And with a glance at this horrible creature with blood and murder in its eyes, Callahan's grasp tightens around his borrowed blade and he nods yes.

And so the fight begins.

Callahan uses his magic and filters it into the blade in his hands and tries to strike the beast. He hits it a few times, but the monster keeps hitting Callahan back, and he drops down to 1 hp.

As the demon cackles and pulls back for one final attack, Shade pulls down on the shadowy chains and restrains it. It howls in fury at this.

Shade asks Callahan if he wants to stop, that if he really wants, Shade knows a way to help Callahan keep going.

Callahan, bloody, sliced up, fighting for consciousness and blinking red drops from his eyes, hands on his sword in a white-knuckled grip, the blade digging into the ground as the only thing keeping him upright, looks Shade deep and deadly in the eyes, his goggles hung slightly cracked around his neck. His eyes have a burning flicker to them and with no hesitation to his words, he speaks. "I need to be better."

Shade takes a moment and the faintest ghost of a smile flitters onto his face and he says "That was the right answer." And he begins to heal Callahan with Greater Restoration.

Now, I could be wrong either with what the spell does or what spell he actually cast, but what happened with this spell was this: he could restore an incredible amount of hp to Callahan, but he would TAKE half the hp he restored as damage to himself. So if he healed Cal for 10 points, Shade would take 5.

This first time he ended up healing Callahan all the way back up to full.

And back to the fight they went.

This happened four more times, where Cal dropped below 10 hp and Shade had to stop to heal him for a moment.

Finally, Shade asked Callahan one last thing.

"I can do one more thing to help you learn the movement of battle, but it would mean releasing him. You don't have to do it, but-"

"You're wrong. I do have to- what would that make me if I backed down at the first sight of risk?"

"...you've made a good choice."

With that, Shade released the Demon, who was battered and torn and nearly as destroyed as Callahan himself, if not far far more. And he let out a ravenous cackle, full of craze and bloodlust and victory. And he looked Callahan directly in the eyes and told him "This is where you die!!!"

Four more rounds.

Callahan had messed up his magic once before in the fight and his magic had surged, giving him the ability to teleport short distances for the next minute.

And his magic messed up once again, poisoning a random creature near him. Luckily, it wasn't Shade, but the Demon was immune to poison anyway.

But as Callahan took hits, he dropped below 10 hp again, but there was no more looking to Shade for help anymore.

He took one last swing, a move of the blade that felt more dance-like than any sort of movement to kill, and he cut the demon clean a sunder- a trail of the blade that ran from one shoulder across to the bottom of its boney hip- and the demon let out a croaking, creaking, collapsing gasp of air that could have been mistaken for a strangled last cackle of defiance.

And then it fell over, a position of defeat that Callahan may have been had he not made the surer move.

And Callahan stood above it all.

Alive.

Alive and by his hands alone was his enemy gone.

Alive and by a blade he used with magic in his veins was he that way.

Alive and the victor over a demon.

Shade healed Callahan one last time, nearly collapsing himself from the loss of life energy. He managed to gain some of it back by summoning small imps that he then proceeded to suck the life out of, but it still took a bit of a toll on both of them.

They went back to the party where everyone lay sleeping, none knowing the exchange that had happened that night.

The spoke for a while longer, Shade telling Callahan of his past while casting the mending spell on his destroyed and torn clothes.

Their shift ended and they woke up the next pair for watch and went to bed.

And now did Callahan forget to tell anyone else about what had happened?

Yes absolutely.

Did Haru end up finding out because 1) Callahan had a fresh magical scar on his cheek and 2) Callahan forgot to give Haru back his sword?

Yes absolutely.

Was Haru pissed off that Callahan basically almost died multiple times and go into full protective boyfriend mode after he found out?

Yes absolutely.

Anyway long story time but I hope you liked it ;D