#I have so many ideas and so little writing energy sadly I cannot do them all at the present moment

[literallyjusttoa]

I want to write but idk what to work on help me choose

[p-taryn-dactyl]

dudeeee ik ur reqs are open so why not give this a shot and see what u think abt it! since the new agatha trailer came out I CANNOT STOP THINKING ABT HERRRJDID!! so this is abt her! (plus love ur agatha content!! ive read all of em ALL OF EM)

so.. what abt a AU where agatha is the reader's manager and the reader is a famous actor? this could lead to a dark fic or just a wholesome light one! whichever u prefer ill leave it up to u!

~p.s i hope ur feeling better!! have a nice day and feel free to ignore this if u want to^^

a/n: first off, i love ur energy so much omg, and also SAME! the trailer goes through my mind 24/7 and i’m not mad about it! ooooo i love this idea!! definitely have to take creative liberties bc i’ve sadly never been famous😔 word count: 2.6k warning(s): fun fact: i am making all of these things up, if you're secretly an actor keep everything i did wrong in this fic to yourself - slight jealous!Agatha - friends to coworkers to lovers - agatha definitely knows how to communicate - all movies and characters mentioned in this are worlds/stories i have written- kinda rushed ending but then again i feel like everything is rushed - i really hope you like this! thank you so much for the ask and i am feeling a bit better 🫶🏻 - i really can't write kissing my apologies

i was the saint, you used to adore me

You remember when you first hired Agatha.

You were just beginning to dip your toes into the pool of acting, cautiously testing the waters by sending out your less than perfect resume to anyone who would accept. Agatha was the first, and only, acting manager to respond. She too was new to her field, so far only representing people who specialized in car commercials and medicine ads. She wanted a change of pace and your lack luster resume spoke to her. Some part of you still wanders why she picked to represent you, even though in the end everything worked out incredibly well, you wanted to know why she wanted to work with you.

Because now it seemed like she wanted nothing to do with you.

At the beginning, it was like the two of you couldn't be seperated. Outside of work hours, many movie nights happened, sometimes an excuse for Agatha to show you her favorite directing and acting techniques, sometimes an excuse for you to binge watch Sandra Bullock's entire cinematography. You would fill her inbox with emails of dream roles, she would fill yours with links to acting classes if the number of emails in her inbox from you exceeded 1,000.

She was your best friend.

You missed her.

If you had to pinpoint the time when she started drifting away, it was right after you landed your breakout role of Aerin Fey in the movie Pillars, which became a boxoffice hit, making nearly three times the production cost in theaters. Soon, your portrayal of the multiversal anti hero was on billboards, had sequels and contracts signed, had custom dolls on toy store shelves. It was everything you wanted, seeing little girls inspired by you as you either walked down a red carpet or passed them in the grocery store. You loved signing autographs in the signature Agatha and you spent nights perfecting. You loved taking pictures with fans, almost equally as excited as they were, after all your dream was coming true.

All you wanted was to share these moments with your closest friend but soon Agatha started only filling the manager role in your life. No longer did she appear at your door bearing tubs of ice cream to celebrate a role you had been offered, no longer did she let you cry when you lost a role you had been desperate for. Your texts and emails became dry, only notifying you of roles she had sent your portfolio in for or sending you calender invites for interviews and late night show appearances.

All this was swirling in your head as you scrolled through your old texts with Agatha, your eyes becoming watery as you went further into the messages. You sat in your living room on your large couch, a purchase Agatha practically had to force you to confirm. You still didn't understand why you needed such a large couch or house for that matter, as you were the only one living in the space. It was damn comfortable though. You let yourself sink into the cushions, your mind running wild with theories as to why Agatha suddenly cut your friendship off. Sure, you two would keep a professional appearance when seen together on the carpet but you were absolutely certain people noticed the tense atmosphere between you.

"Bitch if you don't answer this door right now I'm going to assume you're dead and call every TMZ reporter here!"

The voice of your co-star turned friend Wanda Maximoff interupted your self pity episode, making you realize that the pounding you had subconsciously been hearing wasn't a sad theme song your mind created for you. No, it was the furious knocking of the red head. You reluctantly got out of your comfy spot, slightly taking Wanda's threat seriously. You opened your door, revealing your friend holding a folder with Pillar's studio name printed on the side and a bottle of champagne. You nodded to the bottle.

"Where's the rest?"

Wanda laughed, nudging her way into your home, bumping your shoulder with hers.

"Oh so it's that kind of day."

Wanda took her place on your couch, setting the bottle on the coffee table and crossing her legs with the folder in her lap. She patted the spot next to her on your couch, a smile wide on her face.

"Now come on, we have to make sure we know the answers to questions and what not to answer!"

You groaned at the reminder of your TV appearance tomorrow. Which also meant enduring the new cold demeanor of your be-manager. Wanda seemed to read your face as you made your way to sit back on the couch. She patted your knee once you were sat, her face a mix of pity and a bit of anger for your sadness.

"Is Agatha still acting weird?"

You nodded while staying silent, not wanting to cry in front of one of your only real friends. Not yet at least.

"God that's so stupid honestly. The least she could do is tell you what's going on instead of acting like a fourth grader who's favorite swing is being used during recess. I know you love her Y/N, I'm sorry."

You both laughed and choked at Wanda's words.

She was right, you loved Agatha. You've loved her since the first time you met her and your feelings only grew and intensified as your partnership continued throughout the years.

But you'd never say it outloud. That would make it real. And if it was real, that meant the woman you loved hated you and you had no idea why.

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Agatha was leaning against the wall of your dressing room, her eyes glued to her phone as she typed furiously. You watched her in the mirror as your hair stylist put the finishing touches on the style that was supposed to look effortless. Almost as if she could feel your stare, Agatha looked up from her phone to meet your eyes in the mirror. You felt heat rise up to your cheeks as your own eyes widened, standing up a little to quickly. Realizing once you were up that you didn't have a reason for such a reaction.

Wanda burst into the dressing room, her red dress sparkling in the light.

"They want us to walk on stage together, shall we?"

Wanda held out her elbow for you to hold on to, winking in an exaggerated way. Out of the corner of your eye, you noticed Agatha's intense glare at Wanda but decided that you weren't going to let your manager's weird behavior affect this interview. You hooked your arm through Wanda's, playing along.

"We shall!"

Agatha followed behind the two of you, her stare burning into the back of your neck as the two of you walked onto the stage, cuing the raging applause and cheers from the audience. Agatha stayed off-stage, watching with crossed arms and an expression that could take down the toughest of tough.

The lights were burning and bright as you and Wanda took a seat next to each other across from the interviewer. You immediately regretting your choice in seat as Agatha stood across from you in the wings, her stare like ice as it stuck to your skin. Taking a deep breath, you plastered on a wide smile as you were introduced. Purposefully ignoring Agatha, you focused on how the interviewer angeled her body towards Wanda, indictating who she would be asking a question to first.

"Ok, I got to say," Darcy Lewis, the host of this show, threw her hands in the air as if she was giving a confession, "I can't ask any questions about the movie until I get confirmation about something that's happened in your life recently, Wanda."

Wanda smirked, obviously understanding where Darcy was going, You, however, were confused, your eyes flickering between Darcy, Wanda, Agatha, and the audience, hating the feeling. Your smile stayed plastered on, not wanting to reveal your confusion. Wanda met your eyes and reached over to cover your hand with hers, her left hand on top almost purposefully. You looked down to see a beautiful ring with a braided band of gold set with a sparkling diamond of reasonable size.

"Oh my god!" You gasped out, grasping Wanda's hand and bringing it embarassingly close to your face. Wanda and Darcy laughed, the latter clapping as her vague question was answered in a hilarious way.

"I can't believe it's taken you this long to notice!" Wanda laughed out, tugging her hand back to marvel at her ring herself, "I've only been parading it around for a week!"

You flushed with embarassment, a real smile painting your lips as you covered your face with your hands. After the crowd calmed down, Wanda confirmed outloud what the ring symbolized.

"A little over a week ago, my long time partner, who I met on this set by the way, proposed to me in the park we had our first date. Oh, he was so nervous but I couldn't let him finish his speach I was so excited! Obviously I said yes."

You wanted to give your friend a giant hug but decided against climbing over the arms of the chairs, choosing to keep your dignity as you didn't want your dress to ride up too much.

Darcy continued with the interview, the air of the stage light and friendly as you and Wanda evaded questions and made jokes about being trapped in these roles until you're 90. You realized once the interview was almost over that you couldn't feel Agatha's stare on you anymore. Since you had been actively avoiding the spot she was standing in the whole time, you hadn't notice her slip away. A spark of anger lit in your chest as memories floated around your mind. What had you done that she deemed worthy enough to sever your relationship?

You were surprisingly thankful when the interview was over, everything becoming a blur as you made it back home. Wanda had a date with her fiance, Vision but told you that she wanted to get coffee the next morning. You already knew you would be needing that coffee, as you had a few pages of script to begin memorizing for a cameo scene you were doing for a spin-off show of Pillars.

You wanted to just curl up on your couch and binge watch old Disney movies but you forced yourself to walk in circles around your living room, script in hand as you acted out your scenes. A few hours in, you were getting frustrated. Your mind just wouldn't grasp the script, each line entering your mind quickly but leaving even quicker. You were about to learn how to use your fireplace just to burn the papers when your door shook with someone knocking. It was rapid, almost desperate and it sent a sense of urgency pooling in your gut. You practically ran to your door, afraid of what you would see on the other side. Did someone die? Oh god, hopefully Wanda and Vision didn't break up that would be awful-

The door swung open.

It was Agatha.

Her eyes were ablaze with an emotion you couldn't pin point, her hair was a mess but it only added to her beauty, and she was gripping her phone so hard in her hand that her knuckles were white.

You were frozen in the doorway, your eyes wide and your jaw slack. Agatha just stared back at you, her chest heaving as if she had ran all the way to your home. Blinking, you broke yourself from your trance, and against the voices in your head that sounded suspiciously like a specific redhead, stepped to the side to let Agatha in. She barged in, going to stand in front of the couch, arms crossed as she continued to stare at you. Wringing your hands, you decided you wanted to mend what was broken.

"I'm just practicing for the shoot in a week, would you help me? I can't seem to get-"

"Were you ever with Wanda?"

Her sudden question made you choke on your words and you were back to being frozen, the script falling dramatically from your hands. Agatha came to stand in front of you, her face inches from yours. Your tongue was heavy with shock and all you could do was shake your head in denial.

Why was Agatha asking this? Did she like Wanda? That would explain why she wouldn't be happy with you, as you had grown closer to the redhead throughout the years and Agatha didn't.

Something clicked in your mind, reversing your sinking stomach into nervous butterflies.

But if she liked Wanda, why would she be glaring at her? Unless, the person Agatha liked wasn't the now engaged redhead and was-

"Y/N, please, I need you to answer me."

Agatha voice contradicted her body language, her words broken and shaky, as if she was afraid of a potential answer. Her hands flexed in the postition of her crossed arms, as if she wanted to reach towards you. You took a deep breath, preparing your answer.

"Is this why you started avoiding me? Because you thought I was with Wanda? I've only ever been her friend, Agatha and we only grew as close as we are because you stopped talking to me! God, I thought you hated me!"

Agatha's eyes lost their iciness and filled with panic instead. Her hands shot out and grasped your arms.

"Hate? No, I love you! I though the giant annoucment at the interview would be that you were in a relationship with Wanda! I didn't want to ruin your relationship with her because of my feelings!."

You shrugged Agatha's hands off your arms and took a step back.

"So you ruined ours? All because you thought your feelings were unreciprocated?" Agatha's eyes lit up with hope at your words, "Wanda's been with Vision for years, all you had to do was open Google!" You had started to raise your voice towards the end, all your frustration being let out at once. Agatha shrugged sheepishly as she slowly stepped to once again be close to you.

"I didn't want to be right."

Agatha smiled nervously as she brushed a hair from your face.

"I didn't know what to do and I'm terribly sorry for how I acted. God, Y/N, it hurt seeing you with someone who wasn't me. I thought you just wanted to be friends. "

Her whispered apology melted away the ice that had been hardening your heart for protection and you reached up to cup her face in your hands. Agatha leaned into your touch, her eyes closing for a second before opening and almost blinding you with how much hope was shining towards you.

"I loved being your friend and it really hurt me when you took that away but," you smiled at Agatha, shifting to be even closer to your manager, "I would love to be even more."

Agatha smiled softly, her eyes saying everything her words couldn't. Her smile melted into a smirk as she leaned in, your hands falling from her face so your arms could wrap around her neck.

"I would really love to make up for lost time."

You barely had finished nodding before Agatha's lips crashed into yours, consuming you. Her hands now cradled your face as you kissed, her tongue battling with yours. She started walking, directing you towards the stairs, where the door to your bedroom taunted you with it being far. As the two of you stumbled up the stairs, laughter breaking the kiss, you felt Agatha tugging on your dress, the one you still hadn't changed out of. Soon, there was a trail of clothes leading to your bedroom and once you hit your bed, from the look in Agatha's eyes, you wouldn't be leaving it anytime soon.

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a/n: please tell me u liked this bc i loved writing it :) i love this AU idea and would love to expand on it in the future! i wanted this to be a one shot but the potential in this pairing could lead to a series 👀 thank you so much for reading!! hopefully my writing slump hasn't affected my writing too much but i'm going to keep practicing to get better!!

[stardustedangel]

Sweet As Sugar, Sweet As Can Be

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pairing || college!steve rogers x fem!reader

word count || 3.3k

summary || before you and steve head into the next semester of college, steve decides to take you to a fair to enjoy your last few blissful moments of summer

warnings || college au, fluff, established relationship, pet names (baby and sweetheart), teasing

author’s note || i cannot explain how excited i’ve been to post this hehe it was really fun to write and if this ends up being well received i’ll have more coming for college au stevie hehe <3 || gif doesn’t belong to me || you do not have any permission to re-publish, translate, or take any of my work

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The smell of sugary goods and the hot sun hitting the asphalt wafted throughout your senses once you stepped onto the fairgrounds. The sun hit your face and cast a warm glow all where it could be seen. Steve looked over at you with a sickeningly sweet smile on his face seeing your own as you looked all around you. You were beaming and your eyes gleamed at every single thing you took in. His smile only widened when he heard you let out a squeal of excitement and drag him further into the fairgrounds. “C’mon Steve! We have so much to do!”

Steve shook his head in adoration and let you drag him along. You’d been wanting to go to a fair for so long, but school had always felt like too much to take a break from and you spent the majority of the summer either with Steve in bed or out on random dates with him. He’d known you’d been wanting to go to a fair for a while so when one finally popped up in town he had no hesitation to buy tickets and take you.

Steve swore that the look on your face while he handed you the tickets was the most excited he had seen you since the two of you met, but that was quickly dispelled when the two of you finally got to the fair. Even on the car ride over your leg was bouncing in excitement and Steve's hand smoothed over your thigh trying to quell your eagerness till the two of you were finally there. Now here you were, bouncing around the fairground, trying to decide what the first thing you wanted to do was.

Steve watched your beaming smile drop into a cute pout at the overwhelming feelings of figuring out what to do. He used your joined hands to point towards an easy game that he knew you’d enjoy. It was a darts game with balloons hung on the wall. Small, plush prizes lined the stands of the game and you easily agreed when you caught sight of them.

Steve handed the boothman a couple of tickets for the two of you to play and handed you both some darts in return. You were quick to line them up, one eye closing dramatically as you aimed and threw the dart. It wasn’t hard to hit the obvious, colored balloons, but it still let pride bubble in your chest when you did. Steve was also obviously successful in his attempts though you started to poke his side trying to mess up his game which failed. You both chose two small matching bears for your prizes, Steve laughing at your comparison of him to the golden, blue eyed bear, and secured them in your bag before moving along to another game.

You caught sight of a line of crane machines, dragging Steve along by the side of his shirt when you couldn’t grasp onto his hand from the crowds of people around the two of you. He was easily able to keep sight of you with his staggering height, but he still found it endearing how you always needed to have a hand on him to make sure he was there.

You peered into the glass of the machine, looking for what prize was going to be yours by the end of this escapade. Your eyes latched onto a Hello Kitty plush, one that you wanted—no scratch that—needed. You pulled out a dollar bill and inserted it into the machine that let you have three tries. Steve’s body was pressed behind yours, one arm bracing himself on the side of the machine to hold his weight while his other rested on your hip. “What are you going for,” he asked lowly in your ear so you’d hear him.

You pointed one finger onto the glass in the direction of the plush, “The Hello Kitty one.” He nodded in understanding though you couldn’t see him and your hand returned to the joysticks so you could move the claw. You lined it up in what you thought to be the perfect spot, but soon doubted once the claw moved downwards and you saw just how far off you were. You sighed out and tried again moving the claw slightly upwards before dropping it again, but you had miscalculated how much further up you needed to go when you missed again. The pout on your face deepened and before you could move the joysticks again, Steve’s hands moved over yours. “Let me help.”

You nodded and rested your back against Steve’s chest before he moved your hands with his in a position over the plush, before dropping the claw with the press of his finger. You playfully rolled your eyes when the claw picked up the plush and moved it over towards the dispenser. The plush easily dropped down and you bent to grab it before narrowing your eyes at Steve.

“I did most of the work,” you scowled playfully, bringing the plush up towards your chest. Steve laughed and pulled the plush from your gently to put in your backpack with the previous two and put your hand in his again. “Mhm, sure, baby,” he dragged the word out as he brought your hand up to his mouth to press kisses along the back of your hand.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah smart guy. Let’s go find a game that’ll make you lose.” You stuck your tongue out at him and dragged him away from the claw machines trying to find more games you wanted to play. “Doubt we’ll find one,” Steve teased and poke at your neck making you squirm before walking alongside you.

After playing many more games, ones that Steve hadn’t lost sadly, you were craving something sweet. Walking around past loads of people eating funnel cakes or cotton candy had made your mouth water and you desperately needed something sweet. After Steve had noticed you eyeing a churro for what felt like minutes he looked around till his eyes landed on a food stall.

“Hey, baby,” Steve leaned his mouth down to whisper in your ear over the crowds of people around you, “you want a churro?” Steve nodded his head towards the food stand of sweets at your right and moved you two near it before you even answered. You still nodded your head at his question and your mouth started to salivate at the prospect of getting one of the golden treats.

Your arms wrapped around Steve’s waist and you rested your body against his as he ordered a churro for each of you. The day was starting to get cooler and you enjoyed the breeze that grazed your bare legs. Your legs followed Steve to a cool spot under an umbrella and handed you a churro. “There you go, sweetheart.”

You giggled in excitement and took the churro that he held out to you. “Thank you, Stevie.” You didn’t waste time digging into the sweet treat. The taste coated your mouth and you hummed out of delight, feeling some of your draining energy instantly come back. The cinnamon sugar stuck to the cherry lip gloss you wore for the day, but at that moment you didn’t mind at all. Your eyes widened when you took another bite, so confused how something as simple as a fair churro could taste as good as it did. You looked at Steve wanting to gauge this reaction to his own treat. “It’s good, right,” you asked with a sweet voice.

“It really is,” Steve let out with a light-hearted confused tone, “We should get another later before we leave.” You eagerly nodded and went to take another bite before your chin was grasped in between two of Steve’s fingers and he was bringing his face towards yours. You looked at him with confused doe eyes wondering what he was doing, and then his mouth was on yours.

Your body slipped closer to his as his lips molded over yours. The kiss was sweet in every way and when Steve’s tongue licked over your bottom lip and you quickly parted your mouth, but Steve had left you wanting for more the second he pulled away from you. Your lips tried to chase after him, wanting him to just have his mouth on a little longer, but he wouldn’t give in.

“Sorry, you had some sugar on your lips.” He pressed a chaste kiss onto your forehead before taking a bite of his churro, a smile on his lips that were quirked teasingly as he chewed.

“You’re such a tease,” you scowled and started to walk away from him to another part of the fair. He easily caught up with you, arm slinging around your shoulder and cheek resting against the crown of your head.

“So what’s next, sweetheart?”

You both continued to play games and walk around, trying different treats that piqued your interest. The two of you had also ridden on a few of the rides that the fair had to offer, realizing how bad of an idea it was after all the treats the two of you had eaten, but it was fun nevertheless. You had even managed to sneak a couple of candid photos of Steve when he wasn’t looking, making sure to remember to set one as your wallpaper once you got home. You both continued to wander around the fair, trying to find another thing to do before the two of you left for the day. The two of you had ventured into a part of the fair that wasn’t as crowded as the rest and which made Steve breathe a small sigh of relief. All day he’d seem to have been clung strictly to your side or back, not that he could necessarily complain, but it was nice for him to have his body relax into the less crowded space.

Steve fell slightly behind you, the only way the two of you had been connected was with your right arm extended behind your body to hold onto his hand as you led the way to an unknown destination. Your steps had widened and quickened once you saw a pair of friends exit a photo booth and you instantly made your way to where they had just left. The photo booth was a light lilac, metal trimming lining it with the photo and coin dispenser just on the outside. You could also see the seat from the bottom half of the short, white curtain that would be there to cover at least the upper half of whoever was inside.

“Baby, we have to do the photo booth,” you dramatically extended your words as you pulled Steve along. Steve threw his head back in a laugh, coming to your side and nudging your arm playfully. “Oh, yeah, sweetheart? We have to?”

“Sure do,” you sang out and disconnected your hands once you were at the machine. You bent at the waist slightly to look down at the coin dispenser that read the price of ‘50¢’. You hurriedly pulled out two quarters from the bag slung on your back and placed them in the dispenser before returning to your height and pulling the white curtain back. You smiled brightly at Steve and gestured to him to sit down first. “Why do I have to go in first?”

“We’re both not going to be able to fit on the seat, Stevie. Do you see how small it is?” You pointed down at the small seat that would never be big enough to fit both you and Steve. Steve tongue poked at the inside of his cheek and he nodded slowly, “Good point, sweetheart.”

Steve moved to sit in the small cramped-up space of the photo booth, one leg slightly sticking outside of the machine before he grabbed you by your waist and pulled you onto his lap. You pulled the curtain closed and laughed at the pouty expression set on Steve's features. Your hands went to his slightly disheveled hair and pushed it back. “Cramped?” You cooed at him teasingly. “Yes,” Steve bluntly said with a frown before he pressed a kiss to your cheek and looked at the screen in front of the two of you. “Do we just press start, baby?”

You looked at the screen with the clear bold letters of ‘START’ staring back at the two of you. At the bottom, you saw that there were five pictures the booth would take “Mhm! Are you ready? It’s gonna take five of us.” Steve hummed in affirmation and your finger went to press the screen. The countdown for the first picture began with a start of five seconds.

The two of you could then see yourself on the screen when the countdown started and decided to just smile for the first photo. Pearly whites aimed towards the camera with crinkled eyes exuding how happy the two of you were today. Your arms came to wrap around Steve’s neck as your cheek was pressed into his before the photo was taken. Click!

The next one was a cheesy, silly picture. Your tongue was stuck out towards the camera as Steve did the same except for the fact that he aimed his tongue at you. You squealed and closed your eyes thinking he was going to lick you. Click!

You both were laughing and looking at each other warmly, bashing in the light atmosphere that surrounded the two of you. Before the next picture was taken Steve leaned forward and placed a kiss on your cheek and your eyes closed at the feeling. Click!

You returned the similar gesture to Steve—hands placed on both of his cheeks turning his face towards you, and placing a gentle kiss on the tip of his nose. Steve looked at you at that moment like you hung the stars yourself, always feeling so overwhelmed with the feeling of love every time you gave him an intimate gesture and treated him so gently. Click!

You gently wiped away the cherry gloss residue that stuck to his nose, laughing gently. The last picture’s countdown started when you pulled away from Steve, looking at him with gentle eyes. His arms wrapped tighter around your waist before he kissed you. This kiss compared to the one the two of you shared earlier in the day felt much different. More intimate in a way and maybe it was the setting that gave you both that feeling. Click!

It took the two of you a couple of seconds to separate after the picture was taken and when you did a warmth ran up your neck when you looked down at Steve’s swollen pink lips. Steve’s hands went up to your face to smooth a piece of hair behind your ear before pressing a chaste kiss to your lips and nodding his head towards the exit. “C’mon, sweetheart. It’s getting dark.”

You nodded and left his lap to pull back the curtain and get the two strips of photos that were dropped down in the dispenser. The two of you looked at them with toothy grins. You let out a small giggle before you placed the two of them in your bag for safekeeping. Your arm came wrapped around Steve’s shoulder and his arm wrapped around your waist. You looked at his serene blue eyes and let out a small sigh. “Let’s get that churro now.”

The fair was still booming with noises and now that the sun had started to set and the day got darker, the lights of the fair were more present than ever. Games, stands, and people all around seem to glow in the darkness of the evening. You took a few more pictures—Steve had also managed to take his own candid shots of you—new churro in hand as the two of you made your way towards the exit, tired yet happily content with how today had played out.

Steve was ready to go after the amazing day the two of you had, feeling his energy drop low and ready to just sit down and relax, but his eyes quickly caught sight of a game he knew he’d be able to win for you. “Hey, baby, one more game.” He pointed at the high-striker machine and you rolled your eyes playfully.

“Another game for you to win,” you prodded at him in a teasing manner laughing when he started to let out small giggles.

Steve hummed and nodded his head, “Gonna win you something, baby.”

His words let a small threaten to form on your face and after failing to conceal it Steve nudged your shoulder teasingly. “You like that idea, huh?”

“Don’t tease me. Go win the prize, strong guy.” Your finger poked at his biceps before you pushed him lightly in the direction of the game. You stood at the side, not wanting to be in the way of anyone walking but still in sight for both you and Steve to see one another.

After giving the man two tickets, he was handed a mallet and grasped onto it firmly testing its weight. Some people had gathered around to see him hit the target and while it put pressure on his shoulder he easily shook it off when he looked up at you. He tossed you a wink, wound his arm, and struck down at the target as hard as he could. Some people gasped around him watching the light of the machine travel up and up, and when the bell struck at the top some claps and cheers were heard.

Steve cheekily smiled, feeling a warmth spread across his cheeks when he finally noticed how many people had watched him. You looked at him with admiration, mouth parted at the sheer strength that Steve exuded and when he finally came over to you after picking your prize you smiled at him adorably.

“That was very impressive, baby,” you poked his chest and didn’t move away when he angled his head towards yours, pressing a kiss onto your lips and pushing the big, soft dinosaur plush into your arms. It was pastel blue and had the cutest expression on its face. Steve always knew you were a sucker for cheesy moments like this so it was no shocker that he was smirking at you, pride and adoration seeing through his chest seeing you let out a toothy grin. He wrapped an arm around your neck, pulling you closely into him, and finally walked out of the fair. “All for you, sweetheart.”

You both had made it back to Steve's car, ready to go home as the sun had finally set and the two of you had exerted all the energy that you could today. You leaned against the passenger door, plush in your arms and Steve leaned over you.

“Thank you for today,” you said genuinely with a grateful smile on your face, “it was sweet that you brought me here, and nice to spend more time with you, especially because school is starting up soon.”

Steve laughed and shook his head, “Ugh, don’t remind me.” You laughed and closed your eyes when you started to feel Steve’s face get closer to yours, lips firmly pressing to yours as you were pressed into the car by his hips. You melted into the dreamy kiss, warmth coating your body even though the cold of the evening ghosted past your body eliciting goosebumps that you couldn’t feel. Steve pulled away breathlessly and looked down at you endearingly, happy that he gave you a very memorable day of the summer. He pressed one more kiss to your forehead and rubbed his thumb over your hip. Steve drank you in, wanting to commit this sight and everything that had happened today to memory. “And, you’re welcome, baby. I’m happy you enjoyed it.”

⊱ ━━━━━━━━.⋅ ෆ ⋅.━━━━━━━━ ⊰

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[evolutionsvoid]

I feel that the creatures of the volcanic deserts (AKA obsidian deserts) are a group that is hardly known by the outside world. You get a lot of talk about the beasts that live in jungles, or the monsters that live in the vast labyrinth of the Underworld, but not a lot of people mention these creatures. I would be interested in knowing how many people are even aware they exist! I feel if I asked anyone what a Shockscale or Flab Rat was, they would think I was either talking about a magic thing or an insult. Volcanic deserts are rare biomes, but there are other uncommon ones that people seem pretty knowledgeable of! So why don't people talk about them? Well, one theory is that volcanic deserts frequently get confused with other volcanic deserts, by that I mean dry land plus volcano. So when folk hear about them, they are confused which is which. Or in some cases, they may go visit it to see what the excitement is about and just find an arid piece of land by a lazy smoldering mountain. Not really all that interesting. Or it could be that people don't think deserts have anything in them, as that often happens with regular ones! I have surprised a lot of people whenever I prattle on about all the creatures that live in deserts, as they assume it is a barren wasteland! So perhaps they feel the same for volcanic deserts. These are legitimate theories, but I would like to submit my own! I would say that no one really talks about the flora and fauna of volcanic deserts because those ecosystems are absolutely awful to visit and nobody in their right mind would ever set root in one! Grating sand! Razor stone! Nonstop wind and lightening! It is a nightmare! Every sane explorer would turn back the second they watched a dune explode into a black shower of bladed chunks and crackling energy! They would see the utter misery this landscape brings and think "why not try the next one?" Sadly, not all who explore are levelheaded, and not all who seek knowledge are smart. By the way, have you guessed where I am writing this entry? I got to have something to do while I cower in this obsidian tube and wait for the apocalypse to ease up outside.   My gripes aside, it is a darn shame that these creatures get overlooked. This biome, harsh and cruel it may be, has created some incredible species and the world deserves to know their presence! By writing this down and informing others, I also do the service of granting this knowledge so others don't have to suffer like I did! In most cases, I would encourage my readers to go out and see these incredible sights themselves, but here I am fine with them reading it in a book and looking at all the pretty pictures. So, with that, get a nice drink, find someplace cozy and not full of sand to sit, and read on! This entry is on a rather peculiar beast of these horrible lands: the Shockscale Urchin! The Shockscale Urchin (or just Shockscale) is a terrestrial version of those spiny little balls you find in the ocean, preferring the sandy places that have a whole lot of fire and lightening. Like sea urchins, they do look like a moving mound, though they are decked out in scales instead of spines. This image is possible because the underside of the urchin is where their feet are, hidden under all those beautiful scales. Down below is also where its mouth is, so its topside is really a featureless looking pile of scales. This simplicity, however, has its beauty, which can be seen in its magnificent scales! Mixes of purple and black on these sturdy, metallic scales! While many are small, they grow larger and thicker as they move down and away from the body. Anchored in special muscles, these outer scales sweep out from the body and form structures that seem more fitting for birds! Metallic wings and a fanning tail are formed from these scales and controlled by muscles.  Despite their appearance, they cannot fly, as they are too heavy and not built for such an action. They don't so much flap but sweep and flow as the Shockscale moves and dances. With such beautiful and hardy scales, one would most certainly want one as a souvenir! Finding such a memento would seem rather thrilling, and easy too! If you are ever in a volcanic desert (first of all, have you listened to nothing I have said?) and wander the dunes, you would find some of these scales left in the sand. In some cases, you may watch a Shockscale crawl along and shed some of these scales as they navigate the chaotic terrain. At first glance, you would think yourself lucky! Here is a pretty trinket, let me just reach down and grab it! If you find yourself in this situation, pray that you have a smarter friend nearby ready to tackle you away from this enticing treasure. Hopefully you aren't wondering why I would say this, because I feel the name of this species should give a whole lot away.

  Just like the landscape, which is constantly ravaged by violent storms, the Shockscale harnesses the power of lightening! Special organs within their bodies are capable of producing some series shocks, which means they don't have to rely on absorbing lightening like the Elmis Spire. This means that they cannot run out of this energy, as long as they have the strength to use these organs! By putting them at full charge, the Shockscale is capable of creating a shock that will knock you off your roots and fry your leaves! This effect is powered up because they are coated in these metallic scales, making it so much easier for them to zap you! Thankfully, though, this can only happen if you touch or step on one, right? Good news for them and bad news for us, the answer is: No! The amazing thing about the Shockscale is that they are able to weaponize this electricity in a rather ingenious way! The scales they shed are not lost by accident, they drop them on purpose! That is because these scales are really conductive and practically pull the electricity in. If the Shockscale releases its energy near these fallen scales, the lightening will jump from its body to these lost pieces! That means if you grab a scale while one of these urchins are nearby, there is a chance they will fry you! Like I said, these dropped scales are not by accident, the Shockscale actually uses them! These creatures tend to have territories they stick to, and here they do their hunting. They will sweep their "wings" in a circle and leave a ring of fallen scales. Moving to the center, they will bury themselves in the black sand and wait. When prey blunders through this practically invisible circle, the Shockscale will start zapping! Caught between the source and the energy-hungry scales, the electricity will flow through you while it makes its journey! The power of this shock is enough to drop a full grown human, as it messes with your nervous system and muscles. If you watch prey get caught in this shock trap, you will see them suddenly convulse and drop to the ground. They will twitch and writhe as the energy flows through them, as falling over unfortunately causes one to absorb even more of this shock. In most cases, the prey is killed by this powerful effect, and the Shockscale will emerge to claim its meal. The urchin will crawl atop its prey and use its hidden mouth to devour them. While Shockscales tend to fry smaller creatures, they are quite opportunistic. Anything that wanders into their territory is fair game, and the hungrier they are, the more likely they are to take risks. Even if huge creatures stomp through their circle, they will still shock them despite the fact they know it won't kill them. This is more of a deterrent, as the Shockscale would prefer not to get stepped on. I imagine this sudden way to go is part of the reason this ecosystem is believed to be cursed. How else would you explain someone suddenly convulsing and then dropping dead? Demonic possession? A smiting from the gods? Or perhaps a hungry echinoderm...     In most cases, the Shockscale uses its scales to create this deadly perimeter for both offense and defense. Here it can lay in safety as it waits for food to arrive. However, there are some instances where the Shockscale will use its scales in a different pattern. When traveling, the urchin will be without its special circle. In this state, a predator may try to attack them, assuming the creature is without its usual defense. Since its takes time and precision to properly set up its trap, the Shockscale will be caught off guard. In some cases, it might just hunker down and rely on its own electric body for defense. Some have seen, however, times when the Shockscale "flees," which is odd because they don't move that fast. The urchin will try to run for its life, but the predator will have no trouble keeping up. Obviously, the beast will not jump right in and take a bite, as the urchin will just fry them. Most attackers would tend to hang back and wait for a vulnerable moment. Stalking behind the fleeing Shockscale, they will wait for the right moment to strike and then suddenly drop dead. Turns out, the Shockscale wasn't running. When they "retreat," they are actually dropping scales behind them as they move. They know that their abilities work by proximity, and most predators won't get close enough to zap. So by leaving a breadcrumb trail of scales, they are setting up a devious trap. The predator will be lured forward with the idea that they have the advantage, causing them to walk atop this line of scales. By releasing its energy, the lightening will chain itself through these scales and fry the attacker. Pretty clever! With this defense, there isn't much that can really mess with this species! The only predation I have witnessed so far was by a pack of Flab Rats, whose rubbery hides offer protection from most shocks. Even then, they have to be sure the Shockscale is dead before they take a bite! All the insulation in the world doesn't matter if you jam the lightening bolt into your mouth! Same goes for knives, you little monsters. Though they are quite dangerous, there is elegance to found in these incredible creatures! The beautiful wings are for more than just dropping scales, they actually use them for dance! When mating season comes around, the males will begin to wander the dunes. They do not seek a spot to congregate, rather they seem to move in different directions. I have heard that they are influenced by the sun, moon and stars, using them to guide their way, but I have not fully confirmed that. As they wander, they will let their wings out to the full span and spin around. There is some kind of pattern and design to this dance, as they thrash back and forth or twirl, but no one has truly decoded it. What we do know is that this moving ballet leaves behind something quite gorgeous! Their movements and wings create patterns in the obsidian sand, and their trail is formed from this delicate art! If you are walking the dunes during the breeding season, you will see entire swathes of the landscape turned into a magnificent canvas! These artistic trails are for the females, who are also moving about. When a female crawls over these paths, they can feel and detect its pattern. It seems they can learn a lot about the male from the art he leaves behind, and this will decide if he is worthy or not. If the design is lacking, she will move on, but if it is a masterpiece, she will follow it. Since she is not slowed by the need for dance, she will soon catch up with the twirling male and the two will undergo the next step of courtship. The trail he left behind was meant to get her in the door, now this part is how he gets her to stay! Together, the two shall dance and spin around each other, with the male seeking to impress and the female silently judging. The male must perform the right moves and hit the right timing to have a chance with her. If he bungles it, she will leave and search elsewhere. If he succeeds, the two will mate and part ways. She will go off to lay her eggs deep within the dunes, while he will continue his dance and search for other females. The thing that always gets me with this particular way for attracting mates is how delicate the whole process is. They are doing all this communication through sand art, despite the fact this landscape is ravaged by storms at an almost constant rate. A powerful gust of wind will easily erase all traces of this act, so how do they make it work? One solid theory is that Shockscales breed during seasons when the storms are at their slowest (which I think means they come every six minutes rather than five). This gives them longer times to let their art survive and catch attention, before it is blown away and they have to start over. Others say that the Shockscales also leave scented scales or pheromone along their trail, which the female can still follow if the patterns are erased. Whatever the reason, they somehow make it work! Though the Shockscales are not mentioned a lot by everyday folk, just like a lot of fauna from volcanic deserts, there is something about them that has made it to many shores. In many places, you can hear superstitions and creepy tales about a land covered in darkness and ravaged by the wrath of the gods. This place is almost like purgatory, covered in lava and black blades. What makes this place even creepier are the "symbols" and "runes" left by some unknown culture. Those who have entered this inhospitable land have mentioned grand designs etched into the dunes, patterns and symbols that are alien to many eyes and tongues. All of this, and yet not a single soul is seen! Despite this, the patterns are blown away, but then suddenly remade! How can this be?! Is there some kind of civilization hidden within this terrible world, writing these alien words in the sand? Or is it the result of spirits and demons, roaming the world of fire and lightening? Perhaps it is something more confusing and frightening. You see, these patterns can reach such amazing sizes and intricacy, yet you would struggle to fully appreciate it on the ground. A mural carved into the landscape can only be viewed in one way: from above! Are these symbols made for or by angels? Are they the markings of entities high above our heads? What do they stand for? What do they mean? There are many tales and theories about these bizarre patterns, and I have heard them all! Truly bewildering stuff! I have had people talk my ears off about these crazy conspiracies, and all I can think during these lectures is: "Is this what its like?" The real bummer of it all is that whenever I join in and add my theories, everyone gets all sour. They spin an endless yarn about symbols of angels and the writing of the gods, but then I offer the translation of "Heeeeey, ladies! Wanna dance?" and suddenly I'm the nut job. Chlora Myron Dryad Natural Historian   ----------------------------------------------------- A creature design brainstormed between my friend @james-silvercat and me! I can't remember how we started on this, but at some point we were talking about my volcanic deserts and shingle urchins! Wound up being a really cool creature and a really cool design!  

[ao3komorii]

The Last Hope of a Fallen Prince (FEH Lif/Reader)

This is the last of the Fire Emblem oneshots I’ve written, so enjoy! :) Lif is definitely my fav FEH guy for obvious reasons so I wanted to write a nice story for him! The only other Fire Emblem thing I have right now is a semi-written Sylvain oneshot, but I’m not sure when I’ll get around to finishing it.

For clarity purposes, Reader in this story is Kiran from Lif’s world, not from the main FEH world, but still no names or name blanks are used. Also, to make things easier on everyone, Lif is always referred to as Lif and Alfonse is referred to as Alfonse even if other characters address Lif by his other name. Also, there is smut at the end! ----

You had held out hope, but you felt your heart shatter as Hel’s scythe swiped across Sharena’s back. Alfonse’s cry for his sister rang out loudly in the otherwise deathly quiet battlefield in time with your gasp as Sharena’s body hit the ground. You weren’t given a moment to process the loss of your fallen friend when Alfonse screamed your name from across the battlefield at the same time as you felt a looming presence behind you as a scythe was lowered to your neck, gleaming with sinister purple energy.

“So pitiful,” Hel remarked dispassionately. “You had no chance against death.”

Alfonse was still running towards you, his sword drawn as tears streamed down his face. But Hel was death, and death did not care to give any fighting chances. Death would take lives unfairly, and one last cry of your name from Alfonse was the last thing you heard before the scythe was brought back into your neck, ending what little fight you had left as Hel let you fall limply to the ground, her job done and this world conquered of its resistance to her nature.

“We won’t be able to defeat Hel unless we can get Líf’s help,” Anna admitted reluctantly. “I wish I could think of any other way.”

“I don’t know how to get through to him,” Alfonse lamented. “I know that we’re the same person, but I couldn’t imagine serving Hel. I fear that the other me’s heart may be out of our reach.”

The group looked around, in low spirits, but nobody volunteered any ideas. At least a few minutes passed in this deep mist of looming defeat until the princess of Askr raised her head suddenly, staring ahead at the summoner and alerting Anna’s attention.

“What is it, Sharena?” Anna asked, a hand on her friend’s shoulder.

“Summoner!” Sharena exclaimed. “I have a plan that may be tricky, but it could be our last hope of reaching the Alfonse of this world.”

Sharena looked over to her brother, who looked troubled, but nodded back to her. “You have been able to summon heroes from any point in their lives, right?” she asked the summoner, and received a nod in reply.

“But we’re nowhere near the summoning stones!” Alfonse protested.

“And who could we summon that can convince Líf to help us?” Anna added.

Sharena smiled confidently at the others, but kept her focus on the summoner. “Even without the summoning stones, your Breidablik connects you to other worlds, so couldn’t it connect you to your other self?”

“You’re saying that she should try to summon the summoner from Líf’s world, when she was still alive?” Anna probed, thinking about it for a few seconds before a fire ignited in her eyes. “That could work! After all, if he’s anything like our Alfonse, Líf must care for his summoner a great deal. She might be the only one to make him see reason!”

“Anna!” Alfonse protested, face red with embarrassment.

“That’s what I was thinking!” Sharena replied excitedly. “My brother would do anything for her!”

Anna and Sharena grinned at each other, feeling hopeful for the first time in a long time, while the embarrassed prince and summoner stared anywhere but at each other, cheeks warm. While she looked at the ground, the summoner considered this idea. If she could reach her other self, just before she was killed by Hel… it could save everyone. Líf would not listen to her, but he was determined to save his own summoner. She would give it a try, she decided, raising Breidablik as the heroes around her all fell silent, hoping their summoner would be able to pull off a miracle.

Sharena was gone, taken cruelly by Hel’s scythe that had already taken so many lives. Before you could blink, she was upon you, blade poised to take your life. Alfonse could not stop this, you knew that much for sure. You closed your eyes, too scared to look at Alfonse as tears rolled down your cheeks. You opened your eyes again as the scythe advanced on your neck, Alfonse screaming your name, but then everything around you dulled slightly.

As Hel swung her scythe towards your flesh, you felt a hum from your Breidablik, hanging at your side. You quickly reached down to touch it, and as soon as you did, you felt a pull. In front of your eyes, you saw a light so bright that it made you close your eyes in fear of being blinded. And above all, you felt that someone needed your help, that they just needed you to reach back towards them with your Breidablik. Your only other option was certain death, and so you reached back, straining yourself to make the connection between you and the mysterious force absolute.

Your body felt light for a moment, and you had no idea what was happening. You opened your eyes only when the aggressive light surrounding you dimmed, and then you finally opened your eyes and realized that you were not in Hel’s clutches anymore. Your first thought was that you had died, that this was some heaven where you could be with your friends again. But then you caught sight of a familiar figure, one you had only seen before in mirrors or clear, reflective ponds.

It was you, surrounded by Anna, Alfonse, Sharena, Eir and all the other heroes you had come to know as friends and allies. Your eyes stuck on Sharena especially; you had just watched her die, she should be dead. You took a staggered step towards her, then another, and then just ran at her, wrapping your arms around her as she cried out in surprise. She raised her arms to hug you back, and allowed you to stay like that for a moment before you pulled apart. You were so happy to see all of them, but were met with sad, pitying gazes, which made you feel like you were missing some important piece of information.

“Summoner!” Anna addressed you. “There’s something we must tell you.”

You were feeling on edge, and stared at Anna warily, which she took as a sign to continue. “We’re from an alternate world to yours, and you’re the only one who can save our world.”

You reeled back in surprise, unintentionally meeting eyes with your other self, who removed her hood to let you see that she looked exactly like you. Sharena looked uncomfortable, but she stepped closer to you, and looked like she was forcing herself to speak up.

“Your world was destroyed by Hel. She left only my brother and Veronica alive, and she told them that for every person from our world they killed, one person from your world would be saved.”

“Alfonse…” You couldn’t believe it. “He serves Hel?”

Alfonse also stepped forward as his name was called. “I cannot imagine it myself, but the other me could not handle the loss of his world and is unwilling to help us fight Hel.”

“He goes by Líf now,” Anna added. “And while we do not have the power to bring your world back, we think that you are the only one who can convince Líf to help us defeat Hel once and for all.”

This was all so sudden that you were having a hard time processing everything. You couldn’t believe your sweet, kind Alfonse would serve Hel, but in your last moments in your world, you saw the devastation in his eyes. This did not seem like a nightmare of Hel’s creation, so you had no choice but to take them at their word. If Líf was the only thing standing in the way of Hel’s defeat, then you would do anything in your power to convince him. You would make him see that he was not alone.

“I’ll help you,” you agreed.

“Thank you!” Sharena cheered. “He may not be from my world, but he is still my brother, and I don’t want to see him do this to himself any longer.”

“Then we move out!” Alfonse announced. “If we venture further into Hel’s domain, Líf is sure to make an appearance.”

As everyone separated and prepared to move out, Anna approached you with Eir by her side.

“I just wanted to warn you, you may not recognize what your Alfonse has become,” she said sadly. “It has been years since his world perished, and he has grown, warped by Hel’s influence. But no matter what he looks like, you must remember that he is the same man he was when you last saw him.”

Eir bowed her head slightly to you, face full of sorrow. “I am deeply sorry for the pain my mother has caused you,” she apologized.

“It’s not your fault,” you replied. “But I’m just scared to see what is left of Alfonse. I don’t know if I can get through to him.”

“Hey, are you doubting an Anna-approved plan?” Anna joked, forcing a grin on her face. “If you can’t convince him, we’ll make another plan. But everyone here believes in you!”

You couldn’t help a small smile; Anna’s enthusiasm really was infectious. And she was right; if you gave up here, that meant that you were giving up on Alfonse too. You would save him, you would make him see reason. You were nervous to see for yourself exactly what had happened to him in the years that had been seconds for you. As gloomy as the situation seemed, the more you thought about it, the more you wanted to see him.

“We’re ready to march out,” Alfonse announced, startling you as you hadn’t even realized that he had approached your group.

“Right, I’m going to make sure we’re not low on any supplies!” Anna said, giving you a smile and a wave as she went on her way, Eir looking between you and Alfonse before hurrying after Anna.

You stared at their backs as they left, and Alfonse slowly approached you. When you finally looked over at him, he had pity in his eyes, but held your gaze. You felt mixed feelings as you stared at him; he looked like your Alfonse, at least the last time you had seen him only an hour ago, but he wasn’t of your world. You were the stranger here, and while everyone had been kind to you, you felt lonely.

“I’ve talked with him before… the other me,” Alfonse said as you both turned your heads to watch Anna conduct her final checks on the supplies. “He’s doing what he thinks is right. That is the only way he has to reconcile things in his own mind.”

“I can’t imagine how things have been for him,” you admitted. “For me, it’s been no time at all, but he’s gone years without anybody.”

“I’m sorry that we are asking so much of you,” Alfonse said. “But the way he is now, Líf will not listen to us. Someone from his world, someone important to him like you is the best hope we have.”

You were embarrassed to hear him speak so openly about your importance to Líf. The Alfonse you knew had a lot of trouble being open with his emotions, but maybe it was easier for him to talk about because he technically wasn’t speaking about himself. You were sure that both of you felt awkward; it was hard for you to see Alfonse, but know that he wasn’t the Alfonse that you knew, and he clearly didn’t know how to comfort you, likely blaming himself in some way for his other self’s actions.

Alfonse’s attention was drawn away from you when Anna signalled him forward as the army began to march out. He started forward, but then stopped, remembering that you were still there. They had a battle to fight, so you couldn’t take even more of his time.

“Go ahead, I’ll be fine,” you told him, and he looked reluctant, but nodded and headed to meet Anna at the front of the army.

You followed behind, staying in the middle of the pack. You noticed stares from the heroes around you, but nobody approached you. You knew that they were all uncertain of what to say to you. You looked exactly like their own summoner, but unlike her, your world and everyone you cared about here was dead, all but Alfonse. You didn’t blame them; you wouldn’t know what to say to you either.

“I really think you can do it.”

You hadn’t noticed Sharena approach you, but she matched your pace to walk by your side.

“I know that we’re not from your world, but we’re all by your side,” she added. “It doesn’t matter what world you’re from, you’re still my friend!”

“Thanks, Sharena,” you replied as you both began to walk up a desolate hill.

“I know the other me would want us keep your spirits up!” she said resolutely. “Just leave it to your best pal, Sharena!”

Her cheerfulness was helping you feel better. You needed to keep your morale up if you were to get through to Líf. But you worried about what he was like now; would he even listen to you, or recognize you? Your Breidablik had disappeared the moment you had been teleported here, and you didn’t know if he would take you at your word that you were you. A part of you also worried that he would just attack you upon seeing you. You had no idea at all what to expect.

“What does he look like?” you asked Sharena what you had been wondering for a while.

Sharena furrowed her eyebrows; not upset, but in a way that you felt she wasn’t sure exactly where to start. Her lack of an immediate answer made you assume the worst, your mind coming up with dozens of gruesome scenarios.

“Is he…” You almost didn’t want to say it. “A zombie?”

Sharena’s eyes widened. “Oh… no! Not in the rotting flesh way at least!”

She cleared her throat, looking you in the eyes as she answered. “Well, he’s older… he looks at least a few years older. I always thought he would look more like father when he got older, but…”

You nodded politely and Sharena sheepishly apologized for getting off track. “There is a lot that you will have to see for yourself, but just remember that he is still the same prince that hid in his room when he had to wear his hare outfit!” she giggled. “At least I assume he had one in your world too!”

“He did,” you confirmed, a smile lighting your face at the memory.

“He’s too awkward!” she teased. “I had to trick him into leaving his room!”

“His bunny ears were so cute,” you added.

“I know!” Sharena agreed. “Very worth the fight I had to put up to get him to wear them!”

As you walked along, the scenery changed even further. You supposed that maybe you would recognize this place if it looked like it did years ago, but the land was poisoned with death, warped away from familiarity. The grass was dead and grey, crumbling into dust under your feet. Hel had drained the soul from this place, and wouldn’t stop her conquest unless you stopped her. You would have to believe that there was a way to kill death. You didn’t want these heroes and their world to suffer the same fate as yours had.

The next hill opened up to a large valley, a river flowing down the middle that was bordered by trees on either side. You were observing the livelier than usual scenery when the silent march was interrupted by some cries from the back of the army.

“It’s an ambush!” you heard, and Sharena immediately drew her lance as she turned to face the group of dark mages that had gathered for a sneak attack from behind you.

“Get to the valley!” Alfonse shouted, rushing over to the back while Anna began leading the troops to a better position, all rushing down towards the valley.

The order’s mages launched a counterattack, which allowed Alfonse and Sharena to take the mages down cleanly. You followed behind Anna’s group; you figured that it would be safer for you to be with the majority of the army. In your haste, you stumbled on a dip in the hill and fell forward, tumbling down a few feet, which ended up being a good thing as a blast of dark energy sailed over your head and impacted the area where you had just been.

You looked up, startled by the sudden attempt on your life to see enemies emerging from the opposing hill that overlooked the valley. You realized immediately that you were all sitting ducks running into a trap. The rest of the army had gotten fully down the hill, and hadn’t noticed the threat yet. You had to warn them.

“They’re on the hills!” you screamed desperately. “Get to the trees!”

Anna looked back at you, nodding quickly before giving the order for the army to set up a vantage point in the large outcropping of trees in the valley. With a resounding cry, the enemy troops began to rush down the hills, and you realized that you had to move. You heard Sharena shout your name, and you stumbled to your feet as she and Alfonse ran down the hill towards you.

Sharena helped you down the hill as Alfonse rushed to meet the coming enemies with the rest of the army. You looked up at the charging troops of the dead as they approached, wanting to find Líf with your eyes, but you didn’t see anyone who looked anything like Alfonse.

You did however notice a woman with long flaxen hair who seemed to be staring directly at you, even from all the way across the valley. You wanted to point her out to Sharena, but when you looked back, the mysterious woman was gone. You turned back to Sharena as you both entered the trees to make your way to regroup with everyone, mind still on the woman. You saw a flash of green, and only heard Sharena’s cry before she tackled you to the ground, the spot where you had just been scorched and your cloak singed at the ends by sparks from the powerful magic.

Sharena was up in an instant. “Thrasir!”

Looking at the mage up close, her hands glowing with green energy, you were scared. Without even Breidablik to defend yourself, you were a clear burden on Sharena in this fight. Alfonse had gone ahead of you, so you and Sharena were alone here. Sharena pointed her lance at the impassive woman, who stared past her at you, her stare unnerving you. Why couldn’t you shake off a sense of familiarity as you looked at her?

Sharena blocked the first blast of magic, but it was clearly a losing battle. Thrasir targeted you with her magic, and it was all Sharena could do to block the spells before they got to you, not gaining any ground in the fight because she had to protect you. You tried to dodge her attacks, but it was as if Thrasir could predict your movements before you made them, getting closer to hitting you with each blast.

Sharena was having a hard time keeping up, and one well-placed feint from Thrasir finally caught Sharena in her chest, throwing her onto her back. You rushed to her, but found that she had been knocked unconscious. The woman didn’t seem to care to finish her off, her predatory eyes locked directly on you. You wanted to help Sharena, but you would have to believe that she would be okay. If you stayed here, you would die. This way, you could at least lure the mage away from Sharena and give her a fighting chance while you ran for your life.

You turned and fled, hoping that Sharena would forgive you. You didn’t hear footsteps behind you, but you knew that Thrasir was coming after you. She had easily herded you away from the rest of the army, so you would have no help unless you could get back there or someone found you. At this point, you weren’t sure which scenario was less likely to happen.

Trees around you fell to her magic as you desperately tried to dodge her attacks. You had evaded her so far, but it was at the cost of your stamina. Your chest heaved, throat burning from the effort. You were starting to slow down, and Thrasir used that to her advantage. You stumbled back, scrambling to get out of the way as Thrasir felled several trees which landed in your way, blocking your path entirely. You turned back, on your hands and knees, to watch as Thrasir approached you. You were caged in with no hope of escape. You wouldn’t even find Líf before you died. The other you’s attempt to save her world and defeat Hel had ended before you could say even one word to Líf.

You didn’t want to die here, but you couldn’t bring yourself to even look at her, burying your face in your hands as you sunk into despair for everyone who would suffer because of your death. You had let everyone down, and it was too much to take. You felt the intensity of her power as she charged it up to end your life, the wind whipping intensely around you and knocking your hood off of your head. Thrasir released the blast with a triumphant cry, and you apologized to everyone in your head for letting them down.

“You…!”

You were alive. You felt little sparks of pain, but nothing had hit you straight on. You hesitantly uncovered your eyes, immediately noticing the large figure in front of you, back turned to you and cape fluttering in the residual wind. You looked past him to see Thrasir, who looked angry.

“You’re weak!” she spat. “You know that you must kill her!”

The man did not reply, but her words made him glance back at you quickly, so quickly that you couldn’t get a good look at his face.

Thrasir glared fiercely at you, and then looked back to the man. “If you do not kill her, I will. Remember what is at stake here.”

She wasted no further time with you, moving her hand quickly and summoning a portal that she stepped into, disappearing in an instant. Your fear didn’t disappear, but you felt some tension release as there was one less imminent threat on your life. This man had saved you, but you didn’t know his motivations. You were expecting him to turn around and finish you off, so you were surprised when he conjured his own portal, all without turning to face you.

“Wait!” You didn’t know why you called out to him, but something in you drew you to him.

He finally turned, and his eyes were bright red, but you knew those eyes anywhere. You shakily stood up, body on autopilot as you moved towards him. Every step that you made towards him caused him to retreat further away from you. Was he just going to run away? He entered the portal without saying a word, and you sprinted after him, barely making it in before it closed, not knowing where it was sending you.

The feel of stale air hit you as you gasped for breath, the stress of going through the portal hitting you hard. While you were struggling, the man just ahead of you looked fine. He hadn’t turned back to look at you, but you weren’t going to let that stop you.

“I knew you would follow,” he said, and you weren’t sure what to think of his new deeper voice, tone gravelly from the weight of several hard years on his soul. “You were always too optimistic for your own good.”

He clearly assumed that you were the you from the other world, and it hurt to see him speaking about you in the past tense. You had been dead to him for years, and your heart broke for him. You didn’t know what to say, but you had to say something, had to let him know who you really were. You weren’t sure what to call him, so you decided to start out slow so that you wouldn’t throw him off the emotional deep end immediately.

“Líf…” you said, and he stopped walking away from you at the sound of your voice.

He stood still, and you took the opportunity to walk closer to him. As you did, you noticed that your surroundings seemed familiar. It was a dilapidated castle hallway, banners and portraits on the walls ripped but familiar. So this was what had become of the Askrian castle. It was broken and crumbling, much like the man who stood before you, bearing the burden of his lost world and dead loved ones. The burden of knowledge had been hard on you, but it hadn’t been years for you like it had for him.

“I should kill you,” he growled. “I need to kill you. It’s the only way.”

“You don’t understand, I’m not–”

He finally turned around, and you were shocked into silence as you finally saw the full extent of what Hel had done to him. Sharena had been accurate in her limited description, but hadn’t gone far enough in emphasizing the stark differences in the prince. His eyes glowed unnaturally red, his hair so long that it reached his neck. He was taller, broader than you remembered him being, the colors he now wore leaving no doubt as to who he served. And you couldn’t ignore the most startling part of his new appearance, his spine and ribs being visible, swathed in a ghastly blue light.

His hand was on his sword, but he seemed to be struggling to draw it as you stared each other down. You couldn’t let fear stand in your way, so you walked closer, even as he drew his sword, looking like a wounded animal. This was your only chance, and you weren’t about to let it slip away.

“Alfonse, I–”

“That is not my name anymore,” he snarled self-deprecatingly. “I threw Alfonse aside when I became this beast.”

You noticed a bright light begin to shine at his side as you approached. One step closer allowed you to discover that it was Breidablik… your Breidablik. He had kept it with him after you had died. He noticed your stare, looking down at himself to see what you were looking at. As soon as he saw the legendary weapon’s gleam, his head snapped up to look at you in confusion.

“Alfonse,” you tried again. “That’s mine. The summoner of this world brought me here right before Hel killed me. I’m–”

Your words were stifled by a loud clang as Líf’s sword slipped from his grasp and fell to the floor. You couldn’t wait any longer and rushed to him, wrapping your arms around him as he slumped to the floor.

“You… you died, so long ago…” he stammered, so quietly that you could barely hear him.

“I’m alive… they saved me,” you reassured him. “The last thing I remember was you calling my name, with Hel’s scythe at my neck, and then I was here.”

Líf did not reply, but by the shaking of his body, you could tell that he was crying. You patted his back, and gradually his arms came up to wrap around your waist, his armor cold against your body. You stayed like that for a while, arms around each other, until Líf stood up, brining you up with him.

He conjured another portal, and you quickly grabbed his hand, partly worried that he would leave you again. He didn’t resist, leading you through the portal and into a very familiar room. It had been yours, back when you had lived in this castle. Everything was where you had left it, but covered in a layer of dust from lack of use.

“I come here when I need to think,” Líf admitted quietly.

You tugged on his hand and pulled him to sit at the edge of your bed with you. You wanted to comfort him with your words, but you knew nothing you could say would erase the years of pain and loneliness he had endured. You leaned over to rest your head on his shoulder and felt him freeze up. It made sense; you had never been so touchy with him before this, and you doubted that he had any affectionate contact in the years since Hel’s conquering of your world. The thought made you want to spoil him with affection, and so you leaned further into him, placing a hand over his chest, your palm against the transparent plate that covered his abdomen.

He eventually relaxed into the contact, putting an arm around you and letting you snuggle into his side. You could feel him physically release some of the tension he had held onto for years; he had you back, at the very least. But you couldn’t forget why you were here.

“Their world needs you,” you said softly, and Líf sighed.

“I know…” he admitted. “But helping them would go against Hel. If I do that, we’ll never get our world back. I’ll never see Sharena again…”

The thought was too painful, and you felt the anguish radiating from him. All you could see were his eyes, and you longed to look at the rest of his face under his jagged mask. You pulled away from him to stare into his eyes, placing your hands on either side of his mask while asking for permission with your eyes.

He nodded ever so slightly, closing his eyes and allowing himself to be bared fully to you as your hands found the latches of his mask and gently pulled it from his face. The lower half of his face was the same pallor as the rest of his face, his lips pale and cheekbones a little more prominent than they had been when you had last seen him. His eyes opened once again as his mask was removed, but he wouldn’t look at you.

“I wanted to see you again… but I didn’t want you to see me like this,” he said, and you could hear the sadness in his voice. “What I let Hel do to me… it’s shameful.”

“Alfonse, I don’t care what you look like. I just want to be by your side,” you replied earnestly.

“I don’t deserve your kindness,” he said simply, staring at his lap.

“You do!” you protested. “You did this to yourself because you had no choice! You did this to save everyone Hel killed. All this proves to me is that your kind heart hasn’t changed.”

“I don’t have a heart anymore. It died the day I lost you, Sharena… everyone. The Heart’s Rite doomed us all.”

Your words weren’t reaching him. No matter what you said, it wasn’t enough to bring him out of his own thoughts. You desperately wanted to show him how much you cared, so you would have to be brave for him. With your heart beating rapidly in your chest, you grasped his chin, titling his head to face you. He stared at you finally, his sadness turning to a startled longing as you leaned in closer to him, so obvious about what you were intending to do that there was no room for misinterpretation. You gave him the time to reject you if he wanted to, but he didn’t, closing his eyes at the same time you did as your lips met with his.

He was cold, but the warmth of your skin slowly started to seep into him as you kissed. You were surprised that he was kissing you back considering how hard he was on himself, but it made you happy nonetheless. You had never worked up the courage to kiss him before, despite harboring a rather large crush on the prince pretty much since you had met him. Despite his current scary exterior, he was so gentle with you, as if he was afraid you would crumble under his touch.

You pulled back from him as your feelings for him overwhelmed you. He kept his eyes closed, chasing your lips until you placed a finger on his mouth, his ruby red eyes opening to look at you with silent questions evident in his expression.

“I love you,” you told him, giggling at his shock and embarrassment as he tried to hide his face from you.

“What are you doing?” you asked him, and he dropped his hands in his lap, but was still too shy to look at you.

“I… I never thought…” he stammered, and it was all you could do not to openly laugh at him. As intimidating as he tried to be, he could never fully discard the awkward nature he had always had.

You had already confessed, so you might as well go all the way in on the chance that it could help him further return to you. “Pretty much since I met you, Alfonse. You’re so handsome and kind, and you care so much for your people…”

“I’m not the same man I once was,” he answered gruffly.

“Is this your way of telling me that you don’t return my feelings?” you asked, hoping that you could trip him up and get him out of his haze of self-deprecation. You knew Alfonse, and you knew that he would never kiss anyone that he didn’t have feelings for. You desperately hoped that this part of him was still the same as it had been.

As usual, he fell right into your trap. “No, I… I do love you, but–”

“But nothing,” you interrupted coyly. “If we both like each other, then you should kiss me again.”

You successfully flustered the prince into speechlessness, the tiniest flush permeating his pale cheeks. He stared at you again, his eyes drawn to your lips, and this time he was the first one to lean over to kiss you. You knew how hard it was for him to be vulnerable, so you would make the most of this. A small part of your mind knew that your allies were waiting on you to bring them Líf’s help, but all you wanted in this moment was to comfort him. You would ask him again when romantic tensions were less high.

You let the kiss go at Líf’s pace, and he kept things slow and gentle, cradling your jaw with one hand, careful not to prick your skin with his armor. His longer hair tickled your cheeks as you pressed yourself as close to him as you could be without sitting in his lap. He leaned into you further in response, his other hand sliding into your hair. You lost track of time, and soon he began to feel tiredness creep up on you. You wanted to stay awake and keep kissing him, but Líf felt you start to droop and pulled back. He gently maneuvered your body back until you were laying down on the bed.

“Rest,” he told you softly.

“Will you–” You were too worried to voice the question out loud, scared of the answer.

He looked down at you tenderly, moving some hair from your face. “Yes, I will stay here with you.”

You smiled, crawling under the covers at last, one hand creeping out from underneath them to hold one of Líf’s hands as you relaxed enough for you to fall asleep.

Líf watched over you as you slept, keeping your hand in his as if you would disappear if he let go. No harm would likely come to you anyways; Thrasir knew that he came here occasionally, but she would not intrude on him. She wanted their world back as badly as he did, and they had come to trust each other over their years of servitude under Hel. He had to admit that he found himself wanting to do what you had been asking of him, even though it would mean going against Hel and losing his only chance to save his people. He had been a monster for so long that he hadn’t been able to see a way out, not until you came. He just didn’t know how he would explain himself to Thrasir.

He found himself staring at your lips as you slept peacefully. He still couldn’t believe you were really here, and that you could find it in your heart to love a creature like him. He had not said it out loud, but he had loved you for a long time. All these years he had spent missing you, and you were finally returned to him.

With you here, he dared to hope. He had reserved himself to being Hel’s servant in order to save his world. He had been confined to this reality for so long that he had lost sight of any other possibilities. Hel was immensely powerful, but could she really be the only being in existence that could bring a dead world back to life? Your presence had reinvigorated him, and he felt himself begin to believe that there may be other ways of accomplishing his goal.

When you woke up, he would tell you his decision. He would no longer be Hel’s puppet and damn another world to the same fate as his. Having you by his side reminded him of who he once was, and now that he had you back, he wouldn’t let you go. He would help his other self end Hel’s reign of tyranny, and free himself of his bindings to her at last.

He hadn’t seen you in so long, and you were just as beautiful as he remembered. Every time he thought of you before today, all he could see in his mind was Hel’s scythe ending your life while he was powerless to stop her. As much as he wanted to think of the good memories he had with you, the trauma of you dying before his eyes overpowered all other thoughts of you. He had always wondered what you would think of him if you saw what he had become. He had anticipated a rejection of all that he was now, but you had accepted him and his faults without batting an eye. He didn’t deserve you, but now that you were here, he would make himself someone worthy of your love.

Just staring at your sleeping face helped to stave off his more depressing thoughts. He had truly missed you; he had not been able to sleep ever since he had become like this, but just being beside you while you slept was good enough for him. He felt like he had watched your face for an eternity before you began to wake; he had been so unaware of the world around him for so long that his brain didn’t register time very well anymore. He had to assume that the Askrian army had defeated the attacking forces and would have noticed your absence by now. As soon as you were ready, he would open a portal to take you back to them so you could all join together to take Hel down once and for all.

You were so tired that you didn’t even dream. Or maybe it was an effect being in the realm of the dead. You still felt tired, but you couldn’t sleep forever, not when the Askrians of the other world needed you. You slowly opened your eyes, noting Líf’s eyes on you immediately.

“Alfonse,” you said fondly before you could stop yourself, but paused at the cloudy expression that overtook his face. “I’m sorry I keep calling you that without thinking.”

He shook his head, smiling softly at you. “I don’t mind when it’s you.”

“Okay,” you agreed happily, sitting up in the bed and leaning over to kiss him.

Líf froze up in surprise; he clearly still hadn’t gotten used to the affected from you even after all the kissing you had done earlier. You assumed he was still having trouble believing that this was real. You pulled away to look at the dazed expression on his face and giggled.

Líf cleared his throat awkwardly. “I, uh, decided. I will help the other Alfonse.”

You felt an immediate sense of relief; you weren’t sure if you could convince him, even being from his world. You would go to help them either way, but it would make you more confident to have him by your side. You would show Hel that she would not get away with destroying your world. Everyone you had lost deserved to see her fall. Even though it would not bring them back, you had a chance to save another world and change its fate.

You knew that time was of the essence now that you weren’t too exhausted to stand. You pushed the covers off of yourself, standing up and adjusting your now-dusty cloak. Líf gave you one last smile as he reached down for his mask. He easily affixed it back to his face, and you were unable to supress a bit of sadness now that his face had been hidden from you again.

You watched as Líf reached down to his side, removing your Breidablik from its place and handing it to you. “If we are to defeat Hel, you’ll need this.”

You accepted the legendary weapon, noticing its pristine condition, not seeing any new dents or scratches in its surface. Líf had taken such good care of it, you noted fondly.

“I kept it with me,” he said, and you looked up from Breidablik to him. “It’s shameful to admit, but I would talk to it as if it were you.”

You stepped forward to wrap an arm around him. “I’m here now. We’ll beat Hel together.”

“What happens then?” he asked. “If Hel is dead, will I disappear as well?”

“I…” You didn’t know the answer to his question, and knew that false promises would do him no good. “I hope not. I don’t want to lose you.”

“I will fight until Hel is no more,” he promised, offering you his hand. “And then we can truly be free.”

You took his hand as he summoned a swirling portal that was the same deep purple as the accents on his armor. This was real. You were going to fight your most important battle yet.

“They have entered Hel’s castle, but they will need us if they are to win. Veronica may cast the Heart’s Rite, but it will take your weapon and the other summoner’s together to kill Hel,” Líf explained.

You nodded, feeling worries creep up that you tried to push down. You squeezed his hand; you had Alfonse with you again. You would have to believe that you could do this. You couldn’t leave your allies waiting.

Líf stepped towards the portal, and you suddenly felt like you didn’t have enough time with him. You wanted more, you wanted to be selfish. But you had to do this.

“Alfonse, I love you.” You wouldn’t go into a battle with such an uncertain outcome without telling him one more time. You hoped that it wouldn’t be the last time.

“And I love you,” he replied, his voice sounding the tiniest bit distorted due to the mask, but the emotion in his voice was clear.

You needed to keep your nerve up, so you followed him into the vibrantly-swirling portal… and straight into an inferno.

Swords clanged and magic flew from all around you. Hel’s army of the dead was relentless in their efforts to keep the Askrian army from reaching their leader. You had appeared to the side of the battle; closest to you was Sharena, who was flanked by a few heroes as they attempted to fight their way through a squadron of armored units. They were so focussed on their goal that they didn’t see a lone dark mage sneaking up to hit the princess of Askr from behind.

You gasped, gripping Líf’s arm as he zeroed in on the same thing you were seeing. “Stay safe and find the other summoner,” he said, drawing Sökkvabekkr and dashing at the mage.

You watched as Líf easily cut down the mage, surprising Sharena, who grinned happily when she saw who had come to her aid. You had to take your eyes off of their reunion to focus on your own goal; you had to reunite with the other summoner before the Heart’s Rite was completed. You couldn’t see her in the mess of fighting, but if it were you, you would likely be at the back of the army, giving commands from a safe distance. You mentally wished Líf would stay safe as you turned and ran into the crowd of heroes.

It didn’t help that there were a lot of tall figures in the heroes’ ranks; it made finding one girl much harder when you couldn’t see past the armored ranks of your allies. It was all you could do to avoid being hit by the magic flying in either direction. You weren’t sure if the heroes around you realized you weren’t the other you or not, but they let you weave around them as you searched.

There was a commotion at the back of the throne room as the final few soldiers surrounding Hel were taken down, and you caught sight of the summoner at last as she and Veronica advanced towards Hel. You cursed internally; you had been heading in the completely wrong direction. The army began to close in on Hel, which made the crowd condense further, leaving you no room to get over there.

Hel addressed the heroes that stood just in front of her. You could see Alfonse, Sharena and Anna all with their weapons at the ready, but couldn’t hear what Hel was saying. Just at the edge of the crowd were the summoner, Veronica and Eir. You became even more frantic as Líf stepped beside Alfonse’s side, Sökkvabekkr at the ready. You noticed that he looked around for you, but didn’t see you at your counterpart’s side. You wanted to scream and tell him that you were here, but you knew that your voice wouldn’t carry over the crowd.

“Please!” you begged, shoving at the unmoving soldiers in your way. “Please let me through!”

A radiant glow began to emanate from Veronica as she began the Heart’s Rite that would allow Hel to be killed. You weren’t a warrior, didn’t have the strength to push people out of your way who were too busy watching the scene up front to notice you. You were on the brink of tears you were so frustrated; if this plan failed because of you…

Your cloak was tugged at from behind, and you turned back to see Thrasir just behind you. Your first reaction was to jerk away from her, but she raised a finger to her lips and you stilled, staring warily at her.

“Come with me,” she said, gesturing with her eyes to the portal just behind her.

You must have looked hesitant, because she glared impatiently at you. “The Heart’s Rite is almost complete. If you don’t get up there, Hel will not die.”

“But why?” You couldn’t fathom why Thrasir, who had attempted to take your life before would be helping you.

“I did not notice before, but you are our summoner, are you not?” she replied. “Hel had used everyone for too long. I lost my brother because of her. I will not let this chance escape me.”

She could be lying, but if you stayed back here, the battle was lost. You nodded at her; you would have to take the chance that she was offering you. You had no time to waste to give it any more thought. She turned, heading into the portal, and you followed right on her heels.

“Bring death to that which cannot die!” Veronica’s voice rang out loud and clear as you and Thrasir appeared next to her.

“Now!” Thrasir hissed, and you drew your Breidablik just as your counterpart drew hers.

Side by side, you aimed your divine weapons at Hel, who was locked in place by Veronica’s magic. Together, you fired true, striking Hel in the center of her ghostly chest. And then the woman who had taken everything from you was no more. Hel’s body shuddered as she fell apart into dust.

You stared at the empty space where she had been. It almost didn’t feel real that she had been defeated. Everyone was glancing around at each other, embracing each other in relief that it was finally over.

Your focus was drawn to Líf as he dropped to his knees and your mind assumed the worst. You dashed over to him, startling the heroes around him as you also dropped to your knees.

You cupped his face in your hands, forcing him to look at you. “Are you okay?” you asked him, desperately hoping that Hel wasn’t the only thing that had been keeping him alive. You couldn’t bear to lose him, not when you had only just found him again.

“I…” he panted. “It feels…”

His head dropped onto your shoulder and you realized that his forehead against you felt feverish. What was happening to him? His head felt heavy as he leaned more of his weight against you, and you sat down properly so you could support his body.

You placed a hand on his chest to keep him somewhat upright as you tried not to panic. You called his name softly, but you couldn’t see any signs that he even heard you.

“Is he…?” Sharena asked as she dropped to her knees beside you, Alfonse just behind her looking worried.

“I don’t know…” you replied shakily. You didn’t know what you could do for him, if there was anything you could even do for him right now.

He was so feverishly warm, you felt like you were burning up just from being in contact with his skin. You realized that his chest felt clammy under your hand, and you reeled back to look at him just as Eir gasped from beside you.

“Mother’s influence…” she whispered.

Your suspicions were confirmed as you realized that your hand was resting on the skin of his chest. His chest that was now fully opaque, no longer alit with a ghostly glow, his ribs no longer visible. You hastily propped his head up to take off his mask, his cheeks flushed with life again. He wasn’t dying, he was coming back to life.

“With mother gone, her power has stopped influencing him,” Eir explained. “Death taints his skin no longer.”

Líf’s eyes slowly fluttered open, and he grunted in surprise as you hugged him tightly as soon as you noticed he was awake again, feeling his once-again-human skin against yours. He realized almost immediately, looking down at his mostly-bare torso on display from his death armor, and your heartbeat rang out in your ears as you noticed that his eyes were back to their original crystal blue. He was truly free of Hel’s corruption at last.

He held you tightly against him as he sobbed into your shoulder. Everyone around you dispersed to give you space, rallying the troops to return to their own world. You pet his hair and he slowly relaxed until he was no longer shaking, but still held onto you tightly.

“Aren’t you cold?” you teased him, running a hand along his stomach, watching as he shivered under your touch.

He pulled back from you just far enough so he could see your face, a soft smile on his face. “I haven’t felt the cold in years, so it is a welcome change.”

That’s right. You had to assume he was essentially a walking corpse for years left with nothing but his pain for company. But now he didn’t even seem bothered that his entire abdomen was on display, something that was flustering you as you saw a noticeable increase in musculature from when he was younger.

He looked confused by your sudden refusal to look at him, and moved closer to you, but found that you still wouldn’t look at him. Without the distraction of defeating Hel, you had nothing to keep your embarrassment at bay. You weren’t sure how you were so confident earlier in your room; it wasn’t as if him turning fully human again changed your relationship or who he was. But right now, him cupping your jaw to make you look at him in front of the entire Askrian army was sending your embarrassment levels skyrocketing.

“Are you hurt?” he asked, his tone sincere and so full of concern for you that it made you feel guilty.

You reluctantly met his eyes, cheeks so warm you were sure that you looked like a sweaty mess. You still didn’t answer him, unsure of what to say, and he scrutinized your expression, looking for any sign that you were injured. Finding nothing but your blushing face, he leaned in, closing his eyes as he got close to your face. There were so many people around you, and it was all you could think about, and you froze in place, your eyes wide open.

“What’s wrong?” Líf asked, opening his eyes, his lips mere inches from your own.

“N-nothing…” you stuttered.

He raised an eyebrow, grinning flirtatiously with a challenge in his eyes. “Then kiss me.”

When did he get so bold? You tried to pull back to look around and see if anyone was watching you, but Líf’s hand on your cheek held your head still, staring into your eyes with a determination that unnerved you. “Kiss me.”

You knew that people had to be staring, but he wasn’t letting up, so you leaned in to give him a quick kiss. Líf predicted your plan, his hand that was on your cheek sliding into your hair to keep your mouths locked together as he slid his tongue along yours. His eyes were closed, but yours were wide open with shock. He kept the kiss going for a few more seconds before pulling away, and the air was pierced by the sound of a wolf whistle.

“I hope that you’re taking notes, Alfonse!” Anna teased the prince, who was looking anywhere but at you and Líf, who finally let you disengage yourself from him.

“Well I think it’s sweet!” Sharena added.

You and Líf finally stood up, and he leaned down ever so slightly to whisper in your ear. “I’m sorry if I embarrassed you. It’s just been so long since I was fully human.”

You couldn’t find it in yourself to be mad at him. Not after all that he had been through. You both watched as the army dispersed; the healers tending to the injured as the mages began to set about creating portals back to their Askr.

“What do we do now?” you asked quietly.

“I don’t have the answer to that either,” Líf admitted. “I still intend to save our world, but without Hel…”

“I’ll go wherever you go,” you told him resolutely. “We’ll find a way to bring everyone back.”

“I couldn’t help but overhear–” You both looked over at Anna as she approached you. “You both are more than welcome in our Order of Heroes. You too, Veronica. Er, I mean Thrasir.”

You must have looked hesitant, because Anna grinned widely. “Hey, we owe ya one, and I don’t like owing people!”

Alfonse stepped up beside the commander, his eyes on Líf. “I want to help you… Alfonse. Please come back with us. We can help you find a way to restore your world.”

Líf stared at his other self, the two having a mental conversation for their ears only. You wouldn’t mind going back with the other world’s heroes, but you would defer to Líf. You trusted him immensely, and without Hel’s influence, he was free to pick whatever path he chose. You just wanted to stay by his side.

“I will accept your offer,” Líf answered at last, his fingers seeking out your own as he took your hand in his. "But only if she agrees.”

You were startled by the attention suddenly being on you. “I… of course,” you quickly answered.

“It’s settled, then!” Anna said, clapping her hands together. “Everyone, let’s prepare to head out!”

With that, the Askrian trio began to follow the rest of the heroes to the portals, leaving you, Líf and Thrasir standing in Hel’s throne room. Líf let his hand drop from yours to approach Thrasir, who was standing off to the side of the room. She watched him, awkwardly crossing her arms over her worn tome as he stopped in front of her.

“I intend to restore our world,” he told her. “And I will keep my promise to you. We are allies in this, and I have faith that we will accomplish our goals.”

“The portals are ready!” Sharena announced as she strode up to Anna, who was overseeing the situation. “Everyone has begun to head back to Askr!”

You watched as the army began to thin out and heroes filtered out of the portals that had been set up at the doors to the throne room. Sharena and Alfonse split up to assist in herding everyone to the portals while Anna set off through a portal to oversee things from the other side. The crowd got more and more thin as everyone returned to Askr, and soon it was just you, Líf and Thrasir left.

“We’ll be back,” you said with a smile, hoping to inspire confidence in the two.

Thrasir stared at you, and you didn’t know how to feel. You had never been confident with her motives, especially since she had been at odds with Askr for so long. Having her as your ally was an awkward feeling for you, but she had the same goal that you did now. Although you couldn’t help but find her intimidating, especially because you couldn’t read anything into her stare.

Líf looked between the two of you, and then to the portal. Thrasir caught his gaze easily, humming as she waved her hand in a well-practiced motion, summoning her own portal.

“Until we meet again in Askr,” Thrasir said.

“We will see you there soon,” Líf replied, and then she departed through her own portal without another word.

After she left, Líf returned to your side, taking your hand in his again. As he leaned down to kiss you, you noticed that even his hair had returned to normal, the formerly-white fade at the ends of his hair restored to its normal golden color. He pulled back after a moment and stared at you with fondness in his eyes, a look that you had never seen in him before, even before Hel had decimated your world.

“You don’t need to worry about Thrasir,” he told you, and you realized you must have had an uncomfortable look on your face while she was there. “She won’t try to harm you anymore. She’s grown up in the past few years, something I did not miss about this world’s Veronica. I’m surprised Alfonse got her to cooperate with him.”

“Thrasir surprised me when she teleported me up here,” you commented. “I wasn’t sure what to think since last time I saw her, she wanted me dead.”

Líf smiled ruefully. “When I didn’t see you with your other self, I thought the worst. I was prepared to strike down enemy or ally to have you by my side again.”

“Líf…” You weren’t sure what to say, but leaned your head on his chest, hoping your touch would be more of a comfort to him than your words right now.

“As much as I enjoy this time, the portal may close soon, my love,” Líf said, and the pet name had you smiling without thinking.

“Right,” you agreed. “We should probably go.”

“I would take us there myself, but I have never been inclined to magic like Thrasir. Hel’s magic was the only thing that allowed a brute like me that ability.”

“You’re not a brute,” you refuted as you both began to walk around the rubble of the crumbling castle and towards the brightly-colored portals. “You’ve always been a fairy tale prince to me!”

Líf stumbled as your words hit him, and you decided to remove your hand from his so you could link your arm with his instead. He had rescued you from certain death at the very least, a base quality of the fairy tale prince, and you wouldn’t be convinced otherwise.

“I can’t say that I agree,” he said at last as he helped you over a large chunk of ceiling that had fallen in your path.

“You don’t have to,” you hummed. “You’re my prince, even if our world is in shambles.”

Líf sighed, choosing to divert the conversation instead of dignifying your statement with a response. “I’m just relieved to be free of Hel’s grasp at last. The things I did…”

You both were close enough to the portal now to just enter it, but you stopped just short, staring at the swirling blue magic. Now that you were close, you could see the barest shape of the portal’s other end. It was faded and blurry, but you could recognize the courtyard outside of the Askrian castle easily. You couldn’t remember the last time you had been in the courtyard. Even before you were brought here through time, you had been journeying to fight Hel for so long that the Askrian palace felt like an old memory from another time.

“All that matters is what we do going forward,” you said softly.

You knew that you couldn’t wrap up his pain with pretty words, but you wanted to do anything you could to comfort him right now. He allowed himself to be vulnerable with you, and it meant the world to you to see him smile at you, his grip on your hand tight as you took a step toward the portal. Neither of you looked back at the ruined castle as Líf stepped through the portal with you just behind him. You would be back here, you promised yourself, when you restored your world and brought back everyone you had lost.

It was late in the afternoon when you arrived in the alternate Askr. The castle was abuzz as festivities were prepared to celebrate the order’s victory against Hel. It was all quiet overwhelming for you and Líf, and Anna arranged for a room for both of you to allow you space away from the raucous celebrations.

“You won’t mind sharing a room, right?” Anna had asked you with a wink. “It helps the order save on funds too!”

It was weird, being in essentially a guest room in what looked just like the castle you knew so well, but having Líf by your side was a big help to you. As soon as the door closed and you were alone at last, Líf wrapped his arms around you from behind, resting his chin on top of your head.

“I was unsure if this could happen,” he admitted. “Part of me thought I would die when Hel did.”

“You scared me,” you said, voice sounding less confident than you intended.

“I don’t intend to make a habit of it, my love,” he said, and you revelled in his sweet tone. He was still wearing his open-chested outfit, and the warmth from his body easily bled into your own.

You leaned back into him, and the position shifted his arms that were around you so that they now pressed against the underside of your breasts. You immediately felt him stiffen up, so you went a little farther, hoping to get a reaction out of him.

He easily read into your intentions, uttering your name warily. You were finally alone together, and he was human again, so you didn’t want to hold back anymore. You gently unwound his arms from around you so you could face him. You could tell he looked nervous, but it seemed to be more of a nervous excitement, his blue eyes looking a shade darker than usual.

You took his hand, pulling him with you towards the bed as he followed with short, robotic steps. You were usually so in sync with him, able to read his thoughts like a book. But this time you didn’t want to rely on guesswork. You wanted to hear him tell you that he wanted you as much as you wanted him right now.

You sat on the edge of the bed, and one more tug on his hand had him leaning over you, placing his other hand flat on the bed to brace himself so he wouldn’t fall on top of you. He put up no resistance at all, the longing obvious in his eyes. Still, you had to be sure.

“Alfonse.” You waited for him to answer with a short hum before you continued. “Do you want this?”

“Yes,” he answered breathily, quickly.

You wanted to clarify further, just to be absolutely sure, but he rushed forward to kiss you and you took that as his answer. In your surprise, you lost your balance, falling onto your back on the bed. Líf eagerly followed, caging you in with his body and kissing you again, deeper this time. You were trying to lose yourself in the kiss, but Líf’s armor was starting to poke uncomfortably into your skin, and you pulled away when you couldn’t take it any longer.

“Your armor hurts,” you whined, and Líf pulled away quickly as if you had burned him.

You couldn’t even begin to tell how his armor came apart, but he did not falter, reaching up and unclasping his collar piece, dropping it to the floor without a care. The rest began to come off just as easily, as the collar was joined by his shoulder guards and bracers, his fluffy cape dropping to the floor as he took off the remainder of his chest armor, his torso and arms now completely bare.

You thought that he would stop there, but he surprised you as he bent over to unstrap his leg armor and remove his belt. His entire outfit seemed to be armored other than his cape, and you weren’t sure how he was comfortable at all wearing it. He likely hadn’t been; there was no way that much armor could be easy to wear all the time. You didn’t realize until it was too late that he was intent on following your request exactly as stated as he removed the armor from his legs, which were connected together. Removing the leg pieces brought the armor covering his pelvis with it, and your face flushed as he now stood before you fully naked.

“What–” you stammered, caught totally off guard.

“I would never want to harm you with my armor,” he replied, but the smirk on his face told you he was teasing you again.

You couldn’t even look at him; his sudden nudity was flustering you beyond belief. “…you never used to be this forward.”

He laughed, and you felt the bed dip with his added weight and closed your eyes. You felt him begin to gently push your cloak from your shoulders, and you lifted your arms to make it easier for him to take off.

As he undid your belt, you felt his lips at your ear. “I had years to regret never telling you how I felt. I don’t intend to hold back from what I want anymore.”

He tossed your belt aside, and you finally opened your eyes as you felt a hard prod against your thigh. You were once again reminded of the muscle he had put on in the years since he had seen you as his strong chest and broad shoulders engulfed your vision. You kept your eyes above the belt as he slowly unzipped your shirt, exposing the bra you wore underneath.

And then he was kissing you again and you lost track of the clothing coming off. You had never discussed romantic pursuits with him before, never knew if he had even kissed someone before, but he was surpassing all of your expectations. His tongue moved alongside yours so smoothly, like this wasn’t your first time kissing each other, and you found yourself struggling to keep up with the passion he put into the lip lock.

You didn’t know when he had done it, but as he cupped your breasts with his hands, you realized that he had removed all of your top layers. You broke away from the kiss with a moan as he squeezed your chest under his large hands. You squirmed back further onto the large bed, and Líf took the opportunity to slide your pants down, unzipping your boots and removing them as well.

Now just in your panties, you had no time to feel self-conscious as Líf climbed back on the bed as well, his eyes on your body and an ever so slight red tint to his cheeks.

“Can I…?” Líf seemed hesitant to finish his sentence as he stared at your underwear.

You smiled at him in a way that you desperately hoped was attractive, lifting your hips up as an invitation instead of words. He followed your lead, his hands drifting to your hips to slide your panties down your legs and then toss them off of the bed. He stared down at you, one hand moving from its place on your hip to gently move over your currently oversensitive nerves, the sensation making you close your eyes with a shudder.

He seemed to know exactly what made you squirm, zeroing in on the motions on your clit that made you squirm and cry out and repeating them until you couldn’t take it anymore. You opened your eyes again, hand going to brush his fingers away from your body.

“Please… I want you,” you pleaded, unable to look away from his throat as he swallowed at your words. “That means in me, Alfonse,” you teased, and he stared down at you like you were prey, which sent a shiver down your spine.

His expression turned determined as he grasped his cock, and you tried to move your legs apart as much as you could to give him room. He stared down at you for a moment before he grabbed your thighs, and you squeaked in surprise as he pulled your hips flush with his, your legs forced to bend on either side of his hips to accommodate the position. You were basically sitting in his lap, your breasts brushing against his chest with every breath.

You immediately felt the prod of his cock against your clit, and the sensation jolted you forward, your head falling onto his shoulder. His focus was on connecting the two of you, and you moaned into his neck as he began to push inside you. You gripped at his back and shoulders, and he groaned loudly as he fully sunk into your cunt.

“My love,” he whispered into your ear, and you moaned his name back.

He encouraged you to wrap your legs around his hips, and as soon as you did, he slid halfway out and then rocked back in, repeating the motion and sending waves of pleasure through you. You panted into his shoulder, your throat already feeling somewhat dry as he pounded into you. You did your best to rock your hips along with his, but you were much clumsier than he was, getting lost in the sensations and the high of having your feelings returned by the man you had loved for so long. Knowing that he wanted this as bad as you did made you feel impossibly warm in this moment.

You felt one of his hands slide into your hair, the other one on your hip steadying you against him. He pulled your head from his shoulder, gently maneuvering your face close enough to his for him to kiss you. You put your all into the kiss, wrapping your arms around his neck as his kisses got rougher.

After one well-timed thrust on both of your parts, Líf leaned his head back with a low groan of your name. “You feel so good…” he said, barely lucid in the midst of all he was feeling.

You scratched at his back as his eyes met yours, and you wondered if desire was as blatantly obvious in your eyes as it was in his. He was flushed, and looked like he was getting close already, but it wasn’t like you weren’t in the same boat. The close position meant that you could feel every shiver that went through his body, every quiet breath or groan as he brought you both closer and closer to the edge. You couldn’t hold back your own cries every time he hit in just the right spot, which was happening more and more as he attuned himself to what you seemed to like.

“You’re so cute… it’s hard to hold on when you sound like that,” Líf rasped, and you blushed brightly, suddenly aware of just how many noises you were making until he brought his hand down to rub his thumb against your clit in tight circles and you forgot all about your concerns, the only thing you could focus on was how close you were to going over the edge.

Your sounds spurned him on, as he continued to rub at you as his movements got sharper and harder, the feeling almost too much for you to take. You could do little else but hold on, reaching up to pull his face to yours so you could kiss him. You could feel him getting more and more rushed in his movements, his tongue a little slower to play with yours as he put his all into the rocking of his hips.

Líf’s aggressiveness finally abated as he held you tightly to him, stilling on his last thrust and groaning your name into your mouth. His hand never stilled, fingers bringing you to orgasm at last as he renewed his efforts into kissing you breathless. You were sure that your nails were cutting into the skin of his back, but he made no indication that he was in any pain. Rather, his closed eyes fluttered open to look at you with reverence, resting his forehead against yours.

“I love you,” he said, leaning in for a deep kiss that you happily reciprocated until he pulled back again. “It feels strange to be in Askr with no title to my name. Here, I’m just another soldier from another world.”

“We both are,” you agreed. “I’ll have to get used to not being the summoner anymore.”

“You will be when we get our world back,” Líf replied softly. “Until then, I’ll enjoy us sharing the same room.”

[the-golden-ghost]

Things you said prompt number 17? Feeling like reading a bit of Jigoe angst 😁

17. Things you said that I wish you hadn’t

A lot could change in two months.

Jigen had been living wild since Lupin’s last supposed death (drowning, no body discovered, all of them far too jaded with him now to believe he was truly gone). In Jigen’s case, he probably wouldn’t have believed it even with a body. He knew how conniving Lupin could be. But there’d been no word from him, nothing but rumors of his continued existence on the mortal plane, and now they’d been summoned to one of their most secluded hideouts - not by him, but by Fujiko.

Jigen damn well hoped she knew something he didn’t, because he wasn’t going to work for her. But because she really might know something - and because Jigen was a damned idiot who didn’t know what was good for him - he was here.

It was one of their nicest places, too. Small, on a lakeside, hidden behind some big grassy hills and surrounded for miles by woods. A good place to rest. When they’d been up here together last, Goemon had hung wind chimes and the four of them had planted a garden which was now, as Jigen could see, overrun with weeds, but the chimes were still singing.

He parked his car and sat for a minute. No idea who’d be inside. There were no other vehicles he could see but that didn’t mean the house was empty. He just wasn’t sure he was ready to face any of them.

~

Two months ago Jigen had gotten the news and buried his grief because at this point he was numb to it. Lupin liked to screw around like this - he was magnificent and selfish and saw his own life as a stageplay that the world watched with baited breath. When he died - truly died, he’d assured Jigen long ago - it would be spectacular, the kind of death that shook the world to its core and that people would immortalize in song and story for centuries upon centuries to come.

Drowning wasn’t it, so Lupin was coming back. Probably. Either way that wound had cauterized itself long ago, for Jigen. It wouldn’t do any good to grab Lupin by the throat and demand what he couldn’t give. It didn’t seem to matter that Jigen got shaken to the core every single fucking time but Jigen was just one man, and he didn’t know how to write stories. So on it went.

Goemon was different. After the news came they’d stood together with their bags packed, ready to separate for an uncertain amount of time, and Jigen, shaken, had turned to the one man he loved who he was certain was still breathing and offered himself. What did a samurai need with a partner? Apparently nothing, because Goemon had refused his service and left. And it was that simple refusal that had been grating on Jigen since they’d seen each other last, because somehow, in his infinite stupidity, he’d thought Goemon cared enough about him to want to stick together. Somehow he’d made that mistake.

But no. Jigen was a man who faltered without someone to ride beside, but Goemon worked just fine alone.

~

After two months living city to city in and out of dives and the seediest motels money could buy, it was strange to be in a place with wind chimes. It felt like a waking dream, like none of this was quite real, or maybe it was just the scotch messing with his head. Didn’t matter. The door was unlocked and Jigen walked in with a rush of apprehension.

Nobody. The place was clean and empty and abandoned.

“Fujiko?” he asked to no one. She’d called them, so she should be here. But apparently not. “Lupin?” he called, more hesistant now. If Lupin were to truly just show up like this, casually, as if Jigen’s life were just an intermission he could stroll into whenever he felt like it - Jigen would probably shoot him dead right there and just get the inevitable over with. But he was still gone.

“Goemon?” He wasn’t here either. That made it easier. He shuffled off to the kitchen to get himself another drink and then slumped on the couch for a nap. The drive up here had been way too long.

~

Jigen awoke with a start in the early evening to find that he was no longer alone, that there was a shadow hovering by the window. He scrambled up; taking in through his dazed and blurry vision who it was. “Goemon?” he asked.

“It’s me.”

In spite of the rage and bitterness that he’d been clinging to for the past two months in a desperate bid to keep from collapsing, Jigen’s heart still pulled towards Goemon. Soft as he was, he would have forgiven Goemon for that abandonment. He would have forgiven him for anything.

Anything except for what he did a moment later, which was to recoil when Jigen approached him. “Jigen? Where have you been living?”

“Around,” Jigen said, taken aback by the reaction, his anger slowly rising. Damn him, he didn’t even want to go through a proper greeting? Even now? “Why? Do you care?”

Goemon studied Jigen for a long moment before looking away. “You look terrible. I would not doubt you haven’t even been trying to take care of yourself. Why didn’t stay in one of the safe houses? Lupin would not have denied you that.”

In truth, Jigen hadn’t stayed because it would have been hell on earth. Living day to day, alone in one of those empty half-homes with way too many memories per square inch but no people in sight. He couldn’t take it. Jigen needed cites; that impersonal human contact where no one knew you from Adam and didn’t give a shit in hell about you but where you were never isolated, never cut off from the world. There was security in living like a rat in a wall.

He didn’t say any of that to Goemon, though. Instead he decided to opt for something much nastier. “Maybe I just like living in filth. Guess we can’t all be as honorable and perfect as you, can we? Where were you? Wait - I can guess - training yourself up so you can get a better gig and stop associating with mangy dogs like me.”

Goemon’s gaze flickered angrily but he kept calm. “I have been training,” he said coolly. “And you are drunk by the sound of it. Not that I’m surprised.”

Jigen’s rage flared up again, in full force. “What the hell’s that supposed to mean? You’re not surprised? What, you want to fight me? I’ll show you how fucking drunk I am.”

Goemon didn’t move, nor did he make a motion to draw his sword. “I did not come here to fight anyone, least of all you. I came here because Fujiko sent for me.”

“Yeah? Well fuck Fujiko. Fuck her and fuck you. I’m out.”

He made it twenty miles back towards where he’d come from before he realized he hadn’t put gas in the car, ran out, toyed briefly with sleeping in the ditch on the side of the road, thought better of it, and began the long hike back to the house. He made it in by 1 am and collapsed onto the couch, too exhausted for words.

~

In the morning Jigen wasn’t mad anymore. Mostly because he felt like he’d been run over by a truck. Just didn’t have the energy, but more than that, he felt guilty about taking his losses out on Goemon. It wasn’t Goemon’s fault Jigen couldn’t survive two measly months flying solo without having a complete breakdown. Goemon had tucked himself away in the bedroom and wasn’t coming out. Fujiko was nowhere to be seen, still, and Lupin... who knew.

Jigen sat around for a while and smoked and wished he hadn’t come. But he had come, and he’d screwed things up, so. Over to the bedroom door he went, and knocked.

“Hey,” he asked hoarsely, opening the door a little. “You still mad?”

There was no reply, which meant the answer was probably yes.

“Cause... look, man, I’m sorry. I’m sorry about every stupid half-assed thing I said to you last night. And I didn’t mean a word of it. I just wanted to fight somebody and you were the only one here.”

Still silence.

“But that doesn’t make it right.”

No response.

“I’m comin’ in,” Jigen said finally. He wasn’t immediately sliced in half, so that was a good sign at least. Goemon was sitting on the bed, facing away from the door, deathly still and silent. “Goemon? Please look at me.”

Goemon did not. For all that, Jigen might have been invisible.

He took a step closer. “Look, I don’t care what you say to me,” he said between shaking breaths. “I don’t friggin’ care, Goemon. You can cuss me out if you want. You can say whatever you want to me - you can call me the lowest, dirtiest, most pathetic damn bastard you’ve ever met in your entire life. I don’t give a shit, I know what I am, I just - “ he broke off, pleading. “Just hold me, Goemon, for fuck’s sake I just need you right now, and -”

The words struck home. Goemon turned, looking startled, and reached out to Jigen. For a long while they clung to each other, squeezing tight, Jigen burying his face against Goemon’s neck, twining his fingers through his hair, and Goemon gripping Jigen around the waist and running a hand down his back, over and over.

“Did I hurt you? Bad?” Jigen asked finally, settling down on the bed next to Goemon, who, by some miracle, didn’t pull away, even when Jigen leaned against his shoulder.

“Nothing that I cannot survive. I’ve been training, remember,” Goemon said softly. “And you’re sure you’re all right? You don’t look well.”

“I feel like shit, but it’s just part of the territory. I’ll get better,” Jigen said.

“Good. I was worried about you, you know. While I was alone I was able to improve myself - I hope to be strong enough now to keep you and Fujiko safe at all costs. But I knew that the price was that I had to leave you alone for that time.”

“Well, I’ve been alone before,” Jigen said nonchalantly. “It’s okay. I’m used to it. It was kind of fun not having to do the dishes or listen to Lupin’s chatter.”

“I miss Lupin’s chatter,” Goemon replied.

“Yeah,” Jigen said sadly. “I do too.” They sat for a moment, united in loss. “Hey, Goemon?” Jigen asked after a minute. “Can we forget about yesterday? I’d rather just start over.”

Goemon sighed. “Yes, I think that would be best.”

The rest could come later. Fujiko’s plan, Lupin’s revival. For now, the two of them simply rested, side by side, for the remainder of the morning. They had a lot of catching up to do.

[shadowsfascination]

Shadamy Swordland | Ch 1 | The Hayloft

In reference to this post Sorry if it’s a little long!I might add a second chapter to this. I got carried away and alrady wrote the draft, aaah! ^^

The Chaos energy that we know from the canon is seen here as a source of magical powers. One can master spells and learn the sacred arts to perform them. Special thanks to @shadamyheadcanons for writing all these beautiful headcanons. You may not know, but your writings are a huge inspiration to me and brighten up my day (:  I’m not even sure whether I write well, but here goes, lol! ___________________________________________

There’s a hidden entrance to the hayloft above the stables-building where Shadow used withdraw himself after a day of training his students or intense swordfights. It’s accessed by a ladder, stuffed away in a dark corner of the stables-building. One must know about it’s existence to use it or one will not even find it. To keep it like this, Shadow told no one about it, so he’d be left alone, even if he has a pleasant home to go to. His house was located near the central square on the academy and therefore way too noisy for him. Shadow liked the quiet so he could think. He was sensitive to incentives, which could be a blessing and a curse all at once. In addition to the crowdy location of his home, there’d also be the many, many encounters he’d have with young female students who always ‘happened’ to run into him on his way home that he’d rather go without. Notorious for being an excellent swordsman and a noble too, there’d always be female students trying to catch his eye. When both not intending to engage in nor interested in any romantic affair, he’d also feel extremely awkward not knowing how to let them down easily. He had a reputation of being blunt and did not want to add to it. Especially after he’d been called to the board to explain why there had been gossips around the academy about a romantic involvement with one of his students, Amy Rose.

He made clear to the board there was no such thing going on between them and offendedly told them that their presupposition was to be unheard of. He was her superior, she was his trainee. It was unthinkable that he’d become romantically involved with her. Even more so because he was a noble and she was not. No, Shadow had no interest in romance whatsoever. His work as a trainer and duty as a knight was too important to him and he did not let anything distract him from that. And so he returned to his hayloft, alone. Or so it seemed…

A cloaked Amy Rose snuck out of the trainees’ dorm in the middle of the night, remaining in the shadows of the academy buildings. When unable to avoid stepping into the range of the torchlights on the streets, she used her special skill to briefly turn invisible and disappeared into the shadows again. No one would catch a glimpse of her. She’d been doing it for about two months now and became more skilled in the art of hiding, blending into the background and admitted to herself that she even enjoyed sneaking around. Checking for the last time to see if the coast was clear, she placed her boots on the spurts of the ladder and carefully climbed up. Once she made it to the stables-building, she was safe. No one would come around at this hour and it was far away from the dorm. And that meant she didn’t have to be quiet anymore. A wave of excitement rushed through her as she stepped further, peaking around one of the wooden support-beams. Her trainer and now secret lover was napping in the hay, a twig of wheat between his lips, armor and sword removed. Even without any of it he was still extremely handsome.

“You’re here.” “Hey you!” Amy felt caught. She kept forgetting how well developed his senses were. A heat gushed to her cheeks. “Did no one see you?” “No. Surprisingly, there wasn’t anyone out there tonight.” Amy stepped in on him, out of the small, faint light that managed to beam into the loft. “Lucky you.” “I am. I get to spend time with you.” She seductively winked at him. “We see each other almost every day. I would say we already spend a lot of time together.” “Yes, but almost never can I do this…” Amy bent over and gave him a quick peck on the lips. Shadow then grasped her wrists and pulled her into him to passionately return her gesture and playfully pulled her over into the stack of hay he laid in. Twigs of straw flew up around them and the old, wooden floors creaked at her landing, slightly startling the horses in the stables beneath them. Cloak and rapier were taken off to be placed near his sword and amor. Besides her room at the dorm and the bathing facility, this was the only place where she’d put her sword away. Even when their district wasn’t engaged in a war currently, there were lots of obscure figures around with bad intentions and she should be able to handle them herself at all times. But not here. She was safe around him and could even pretend to be a damsel in destress if she wanted. She properly sat next to him, being handed a handmade clay cup with fresh water, which was all he could provide her up here. It was unevenly round and was a steal from the dorm-kitchen.

“Sadly you cannot. I was called to the board a few days ago.” “What? Why?” “They asked me to explain the apparently present gossips about us being romantically involved. I believe they bought my story, seeing how the apologized for the improper assumption after my offended reaction.” “There’s gossips about us? That’s bad! I cannot imagine who would have caught onto us. We’ve been really careful.” Amy chewed her lip and drew a sorrowfully face, staring at her reflection in the cup.

“Beats me.” “So, what did you tell them?” “I might have raised my voice and angrily scolded them for daring to accuse me of such foul, improper behaviour, you know?” Shadow said with a neutral expression. Amy heaved a sigh. “Plagues, Shadow! You really said that? Oh, who am I kidding? Of course that’s what you said!” “What are you being so dramatic for? It is in fact one of the very few assets that comes with the title of being a noble.” “You’re hopeless. Others will despise you for this kind of behaviour.” “What business do I have with others? Besides, they’re already not very fond of me. I’m an outsider and always will be. Anyway, we have got to be extra cautious from now on. They let me off with a warning, but this is serious.” “Serious, how?” “If they have the slightest proof that something is in fact going on, I’ll be suspended from training students and you’ll…” A long pause followed while Shadow looked away from her.

“You’ll be refrained from participating in battles, not allowing you to advance in your training or education. Worst case scenario might be that you’ll even be transferred to another academy.” “Aaargh! That’s so unfair!”

Amy intensified the grip on the cup enough to cause a crack in the enamel and angrily muttered about the ways she could scold the board for being this unreasonable. If it weren’t the middle of the night her somewhat impulsive, hot-headed nature might’ve gotten the best of her, storming off to the board to give them a piece of her mind. That was if they’d even let them see her. It wasn’t her place, coming from a lower-rank family. She furiously hated the hierarchy in the world and let out a curse. Shadow then grabbed her face and accidentally squeezed her muzzle a little too hard. Interrupting her many wrath-driven ideas to change the board’s vision, she was now forced to look at him. “I’m telling you now: you are NOT to mingle in this! I forbid it.”

“You forbid it?!” Amy broke away from his grip, bewildered and offended by his statement. “Yes, I forbid it. One of the benefits of being both your trainer and your lover. You’ll only make things look more suspicious.” An angry frown appeared on her face. “It’s not okay that they have that much power! I hate it! It shouldn’t matter! It doesn’t matter how big the gap between us is! I don’t understand how you’re not upset about this?!” “Fire and torments, Amy!” Shadow yelled at her. “Just get over it! Both our futures are at stake here! You have great potential to become a fine swordswomen and I’m not just saying that because you’re my trainee.” “So, our career-perspective is all that matters to you?” A sudden cold gushed through his body and Shadow’s face grew pale, leaving his hands to tremble and fists clenched. “How dare you say that to me?!” He whirled around, pushed her down and bent over her. The heart that had eagerly anticipated being with him tonight was now afraid of him for the first time in her life. It cramped inside her chest in fear, but that feeling faded to be replaced with a mixture of compassion and sadness when she caught his gaze. “BLAST, women! You’re the only person I choose to hang out with voluntarily. THE ONLY ONE!” A crack in his voice ended his scream. Startled by his outburst and her own false accusations, mean even in a way, Amy fell quiet. He wasn’t angry. He was afraid! Afraid to lose her. Shadow turned his face away from her, swallowed and bitterly stated: “If that’s what you think of me, you’d better take lea-“ Amy leaned in on Shadow, pulling him into her and silenced his doubts with a passionate, yet tender kiss. The hands that were clenched together as fists just a moment ago, opened up and slid under her back to lift her in his arms, holding her closer to his body. Her heartrate changed into a different pace, still rapid, but now driven by the intimate connection between them. She broke away from their kiss, eyes tearing up. “I don’t! At all!” He nodded at her once, closing the remaining distance between them again before she could entirely finished her sentence. He not only locked lips with her once more, but lifted her muzzle with his index-finger to force her gaze upon his. Amy then clasped her hands onto his back, slightly losing touch with reality with every touch. She ran her fingers through his quills in ways that made him shiver, returning his hasty, impatient ways of loving her. Shadow’s lips found their way to the soft lines that formed her jaw, then her neck and softly, heatedly blew in her ear, sending a hot rush through her veins. Abruptly he sat up. “Shadow, wha-“ He silenced her at once. His ears then twitched. Did he hear something? She held her breath. Suddenly the least of background sounds were highly present and she couldn’t differentiate them anymore. Luckily, as a feature of the ultimate lifeform, he was more than qualified to. When he breathed out at last, she followed his lead. “False alarm. I thought I heard something there for a minute.” Already leaning in to pick up where they left, Shadow was stopped by Amy. “Hey…I’m really sorry about before…” “Just promise me that you’ll stay out of it.” “I’ll bear with it.” “It’s only until you graduate. Now, can we please drop the subject?”

“Sure thing, my lord.”

She stuck out her tongue, knowing he hated to be called that and gave him a playful push, but was suddenly startled by the sound of a crack coming from the ladder. “Someone’s here!” She whispered with eyes wide open. She panicked, grasped in the direction of her belt to find that her sword still laid on the haystack and rushed over to get it. Being followed by Shadow, who also gathered his armor and sword and pulled her close to him. She looked at him in confusion. “Trust me, I have a trick up my sleeve: Chaos Control.” Having arrived at his house by teleportation caused by what Amy guessed was a high level sacred art spell, she heavily breathed out the tension in her body.

“That was amazing! How did you…What kind of spell was that?!”

“Plagues, Amy! Your cloak!”

“No, no, no!” she called out in despair, but regained hope when Shadow pointed out this was an excellent occasion for her to use her special skill.

He warped them back to the stables and hid somewhere, waiting for her to come back with the cloak.

Amy turned invisible and entered the spurts of the ladder as quiet as possible.

She quickly scanned the loft for the stranger. Her vision became more blurry when using her special skill, which was one of the downsides of it.

She was in luck: there was no one around. The other must have left.

There it was!

She swiftly footed her way to the piece of clothing, grabbed it and turned around to leave.

In the blink of an eye Amy regained visibility when a hand cupped her mouth from behind.

Amy let out a muffled cry.

The free hand of the stranger pushed her arms behind her back and fumbled the cloth around them.

“Surprise!”

[lets-get-kraken-boys]

MHA Headcanon: Being Apart of Both The Baku + Deku Squads

(Description: Wow! I’m so happy with the amount of praise my FatGum fic has gotten! I cannot thank you guys enough for over 100 likes/reblogs, you all mean the world to me. This idea struck me in the dead of the night and I just had to write it down. Love you!)

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Requester: No One!

Reader Gender: Gender Neutral (They/Them)

Style of Story: Headcanon(s) // Just some funny ideas I had. Nothing extremely romantic about this one, unless you count Denki’s insatiable flirting attempts as romance!

Word Count: 2.7K Words

WARNING(s): None, just a few cuss words here and there.

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DekuSquad

Meeting

You were more than likely an OG of this group (with Deku, Uraraka, and Iida alongside you) and became fast friends on the first day of school together

You went to class early on the first day at UA (which was unusual for you since sleep is high on your priority list), but you wanted to make a good impression on the staff and meet potential new friends or allies in your career

You got there before most, sat in your designated seat, and people watched the unfamiliar faces in the classroom, trying to get a feel of the energy the kids presented. Not long after you sat down did a scene already break out between a stiff, but kind-looking bluenette who shouted orders at an aggressive blonde with spiky hair. They bickered for a bit, it was eventually calmed down by the teacher, but you noticed a few people at the doorway having a conversation

A brown haired girl and a green haired boy who looked like he was about to die from blushing too hard were standing near the door with the bluenette from earlier. They were all smiling so wide and all had such different personalities that it made you smile, deciphering in your head that there was no way you were leaving this school today without saying ‘hi’ them

Eventually, over the course of the school day (before the whole incident with the fake expulsion) you introduced yourself to the three, and you being the sweet cutie you are, were quickly accepted into the trio as one of them

And the rest is pretty much history! All of you became besties from that point on, dragging Tsu, Momo, and a reluctant Todoroki (at first) into the whirlwind that is your friend group!

What Do They Think Of You Personally

Deku: You’re one of his best friends, he can trust you with pretty much anything. He even considers telling you about One For All once, but sadly that is too big of a secret to tell (for now), but he’ll tell you basically anything else! Learning about your quirk, your goals and dreams, and just plain talking with you always puts him at ease. You help him with his life problems and stressors, even when he’s mumbling away and overthinking you give him a moment to let him get all of his thoughts out instead of interrupting him. He hopes to be heroes with you to the very end, never forget that!

Uraraka: She absolutely adores you! Smart, funny, sweet, you’re the whole package. You’re trustworthy and the drive you have in life keeps her motivated to be a hero with you. You help each other out, she values this friendship more than some others. She feels she can go to you for anything, she only hopes that you feel the same way with her because she has no doubt in her mind that she will go to hell and back for you.

Iida: For awhile he didn’t understand why Midoriya and Uraraka liked you so much. Don’t get me wrong, he found you fun to hang out with and nice, but he never really saw why they blindly trusted you. That is, until you came to visit Izuku, Shoto, and him in the hospital the weekend after the Hosu/Stain (but you don’t know about the villain) incident. You wished for them to get better, gave each of them a handwritten card and baked goods before leaving to get back to UA, parting with a wide smile and hugs for them all. He finally fully sees your kind nature and the open honesty you give to everyone, and is ready to be a hero with you for as long as you deem necessary. The kindness you gave him that day affected him more than you will ever know, as you helped him see past his plot of revenge and strive to be a hero not to hurt others but to change the world so tragedies like this never happen again.

Tsu: She noticed early on how you always brighten a room whenever you’re there, so she (along with many others) were drawn to that warmth. She appreciates your understanding and forgiving attitude, she feels like she doesn’t have to hide or be ashamed of who she is around you. The USJ incident really made her think about how precious life is and how quickly it can be taken away, so she is grateful that someone as generous as you decided to be friends with her and the rest of the DekuSquad.

Todoroki: Apprehensive of you at first (like he was with everyone), but after you showed your loyalty and dedication to not your work but your friendships, he wants to get to know you better. It’ll take awhile to get past his cold exterior, but if you stay he’ll consider you one of his greatest allies. Plus, you can teach him how to open up to others and learn to love again, who wouldn’t want to help Shoto?

Momo: She knows she’s smart so she’s more than happy to help you with school work (if you need it, that is). The first time she knew she could fully trust you is when Mineta was perving about her hero uniform and tried to inappropriately touch her, but you grabbed and punted him at least 50 yards into the distance while screaming, “Women's rights, perv!” and ever since that day you’ve been her knight in shining armour. She always thinks about inviting you as her guest first when she has to attend fancy dinners/parties with her parents. She appreciates all your help with protecting her and the other girls in Class 1-A, but also a great friend. If you ever need anything, she’ll be there first to help!

Hanging Out / Having Fun / Random Things

Group. Study. SESSIONS! Seriously. You have some of the smartest people in Class 1-A in the DekuSquad with you, if you don't use that knowledge to your benefit, I’ma slap you. They’re always willing to help one another out, no matter how immense the problem.

Mario Kart, Apples to Apples, even Hide-And-Seek (in and outside the dorms), everything is on the table for Group Game Night (and, yes, Group Game Night is a weekly event)

You train with Deku, Todoroki, and even Uraraka sometimes on the weekends and HOE BOI, you haven’t felt true envy until you jokingly test to see if a cutsie green-haired 16 year old can bench your entire body and feel your soul die as he actually lifts you up and over his head with ease

Your noodle arms could never. You just want to be sTRONG!!! (I feel that)

You cannot make a self deprecating joke in front of them. Ever. Even if you THINK about making one, you will be sat down on a comfy chair, given a glass of milk and a cookie, and counseled on your emotions and well being until the dorm’s curfew

They just love and care about you. Why can’t you see yourself the way they do? (K, I made myself cry with that one.)

Anyways, it’s wholesome, cinnamon roll energy 24/7. Finally, the serotonin we all need.

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BakuSquad

Meeting

You’re a little late getting into the BakuSquad, but you get there eventually!

You, Mina, and Kirishima are paired up for a group project in the middle of the year. Sad that you can’t be with your normal friend group in this project, you try to look on the bright side and enjoy their company.

You three end up having way too much fun. Opting to, instead of doing the homework, end up playing video games with Kirishima, Mina, and a flirty blonde named Kaminari, hanging upside down on the ceiling with the smiley blacknette, Sero, pretending to be “Spiderman” while relaxing with the spunky Jiro, and eventually getting caught by the angry blonde from the first day of school named Bakugou, who forces the three of you to sit down and finally get the work done before it was too late, but even that was fun!

Later that weekend, you all plan to meet up at the mall (Bakugou being dragged along by Kirishima) and hang. You ended up running around the different floors laughing like maniacs, getting way too many sugar highs from eating too much candy, somehow end up in a Taco Bell parking lot at 1AM screaming “Bohemian Rhapsody” to the moon while drinking Baja Blasts together, and having to sneak back into the dorms carrying a derpy Kaminari carefully inside because he blew out his power trying to impress you with a flirty pickup line.

You stumbled into your dorm after hearing a quick, “Night, (Y/N)!” from Kirishima since he had kindly walked you to your room to make sure you got back okay, and took a deep breath in while leaning against the door. You walked to your bathroom mirror and looked at your frizzled hair, colorful stained lips from the candy you’d eaten, the empty Baja Blast cup in your hand that you had used as a microphone, and smiled. You have got to stay friends with these idiots.

And that you did, the crazy BakuSquad has a new member!

What Do They Think Of You Personally

Bakugou: I’ll just say this, it takes guts to befriend a person like him, and he knows it, so he pretends to hate you and your determination to stay by his side (as he does with most people) for the LONGEST time. It takes him years to show you his softer sides, but when he does break down those barriers for you it’s well worth the wait. After that, he trusts you with his life, and him with yours. He hates to admit it because he has seen the crazy in you around the others, but you are caring and would take all the time in the world to listen to his or anyone else's problems. He knows you’ve seen the tough things in life and he respects you for it. You’ll be a strong hero, just not better than him!

Kirishima: Honestly after meeting the BakuSquad and now you, his self esteem has never been higher! He was struggling for the longest time with self doubt but after befriending all of you he knows that he finally has a place in this world and people who care about him for more than his quirk. You give him an even bigger reason to keep striving to be a hero, if he can meet amazing people like you in his career path then he never wants to leave. He sees that project as one of the best things that has ever come out of school!

Denki: Definitely tries (and fails miserably) to score a date with you an ungodly amount of times. He can’t help it, you’re so pretty and nice and if you were his significant other he’d be over the moon. If you’re not comfortable with his flirting, he will eventually lay off, but that won’t stop him from daydreaming of being with you. Fate or not, meeting you feels like a dream, and with you being kind to literally everyone around you, it would have been impossible for him to resist being friends with you either way. He loves you and admires your strength as a hero, you’re both gonna go far together.

Mina: She feels that getting paired together for that project was destiny in the works! You make everyone so happy and she feels blessed that she can help you learn how to let loose and go with the flow. You two have an infinite amount of gossip supply, the tea is never not hot or empty. You both have some righteous dirt (but you’re both nice enough to not cause chaos within UA, so it stays on the ground).

Sero: The life the BakuSquad gained from you joining is indescribable. You are like the cool parental figure who turned into a thrill junkie, and seeing that transformation was absolutely hilarious. He enjoys your company, where the room can be filled with noise or dead silent but still be comfortable, he lives to find those people. Plus, being non-judgmental means that he’ll open up to you about more than what others see. 10/10, you two vibe together.

Jiro: Best buddies. You fight alongside her in defending the women of UA from pervs, so that is already a huge gain. She loves sharing her music taste with you and you with her, you’ve opened up her tastes far more than she ever imagined (because of you she listens to the catcher pop songs more now than just straight punk 24/7, good for you!) Your opinion is one of the few she won’t brush off, so she’ll listen to what you have to say too.

Hanging Out / Having Fun / Random Things

The chaotic, feral energy you guys have is something else, my dude. Just thinking about it gives me shivers (I pray for Aizawa sometimes).

Intense battles of Super Smash Bros. Ultimate, Just Dance, and Cards Against Humanity every weekend (Bakugou always wins because he gets all the nastiest/funniest cards)

Who you are with the DekuSquad (calm, careful, collected) gets YEETED away when the BakuSquad comes into play. You go batshit, and it feels good! Like, you’re still kind and caring, but you add a dash of crazy in there when Kaminari starts bumping the Crazy Frog song, so you finally decide it’s okay to let loose with them. It’s a full on identity crisis if I’ve ever seen one.

But don’t be mistaken, if ever someone in the squad needs help or is hurt in any way, you’re all over it. You’ll counsel, hug, and/or kill whoever you need to make sure your friends are okay (and vice-versa with everyone else too)

You sometimes train with Bakugou and Kirishima after school. It’s tough, so you don’t do it often, but when you do you never leave feeling you could have put in more effort. Bakugou’s taunts and Kiri’s encouraging words always compel you to give more and more, to the point of you feeling like passing out at the end.

Weird side note: Bakugou’s parents love all of you like you’re their own kids??? IDK why, but I have a feeling if he ever brought the BakuSquad (+ you) home to hang and meet his parents, they would fall in love and adopt you guys faster than Katsuki can say “DIEEE!”

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Both Groups Together

What Do They Think Of You Being In Both Groups

DekuSquad: They don’t care at all. You’re allowed to be friends with whoever you want. True, they’ll be sad when they make plans together but you can’t make it because you’ve already planned to hang with the BakuSquad and get nervous when they see your Snapchat story update that Denki got himself stuck in a trashcan trying to impress you, but that’s okay! They’ll just let you know if anything important or hilarious happens when you're gone! All in all, it’s great.

BakuSquad: They pretty much feel the same as the DekuSquad, who are they to choose who you associate yourself with, but Bakugou is still pissed to this day that you cannot/will not pick a “side”. He honestly sees it as a test, if he can make you officially be in the BakuSquad and not hang out with those “extras” anymore, then he beats Deku in yet another thing. He’ll eventually come to terms with the fact that your friendships and feelings aren’t a game, but he’ll still keep it a personal goal to try and make his group more enjoyable to be around so you potentially be on only his side. The rest of them don’t view you as property to be owned, your life is your life!

Both Hanging Out: Getting Bakugou to chill with “losers” who aren’t his own team is extremely difficult. He doesn’t play nice with others, even sometimes his own squad! But everyone else enjoys the opposite squad’s vibe, so if you guys wanted to have a group movie night or just a massive hang out, everyone would be down! Get ready for countless nights of gossiping with the girls and playing pranks on other students with the boys (and maybe running away from a furious Aizawa)!

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~ THE END! ~

[nanowrimo]

Meet Our New NaNo Interns: Sandra, Chyina, and Fatima!

We feel super lucky here at NaNo HQ to be able to work with some excellent interns! Today, meet our newest cohort of interns: Sandra, Chyina, and Fatima. You’ll be getting to know them better throughout November, but today they’re here to tell you a little about themselves:

Sandra, Programs Intern

Hi Wrimos—it’s going to be a weird one this year! I type this introduction from the brick buildings of Providence, Rhode Island, where I remain holed up with my housemates. Our walls are thin enough that we can hear each other as we attend our respective classes; we emerge for sustenance and, occasionally, the craven desire for friendship, which would be typical for college students if it weren’t for the ever-present pandemic looming over our heads. 

Last night, I woke up shivering because of an unaccountable cold snap, when it’s usually sweltering in Rhode Island until late September. Meanwhile my family in California wake up to red skies and temperatures well into the 100s. I haven’t felt this unsure about my future since I was eight and learned that someday, the sun would swell into a red giant and vaporize our planet, and in such chaos, I find myself exceedingly grateful for the regular annual event of NaNoWriMo.

This NaNoWriMo, I’m looking forward to seeing all the wonderful ways our community can reach across the web to connect! Already, in the YWP forums I’ve seen so many ways young writers are supporting each other in these times of stress; who’s to say us ancient ones can’t equally rise to the occasion? Right now, the constant in my life is looking for the kinder moments in life, the neighbors helping each other, the small acts of solidarity and compassion in even just a pal reaching out to check on me. I anticipate many of those moments emerging this November, as writer alike helps each other to the finish line. 

I said it would be a weird one this year, but weird is good, I’ve found. Weird is memorable—in the long and storied history of NaNoWriMo, this year will truly stand out as a novel-ty (hah). As this year’s Program Intern, I hope this introduction has already told you what you need to know about me: I love this community, and my entire role is devoted to cheering you all on. It’s a selfish wish too—I’ll be alongside the rest of you, trucking along with a garbled mess of a novel, and feeding off the communal energy. 

Anyone who undertakes the creative behemoth of NaNoWriMo in these times has already won, in my humble opinion, as creators and authors of tales waiting to be told. Looking forward to the next few months!

Chyina, Editorial Intern

Picture a young girl reading the complete works of Edgar Allan Poe. Fast forward a few years and she has discovered that the only thing she wants to do is work with words: reading them, writing them, editing them, or making them up. Now, imagine a year of pure chaos and craziness.

You may have guessed that the girl is me and that the year is 2020. Well, as ridiculous as this year has been, it did give me the opportunity to work with NaNoWriMo as an intern. I have been participating since I was in high school and when I found out that they were looking for remote interns for the first time ever, I had to apply. And I cannot wait to begin working as the Editorial Intern this fall.

For the curious minds who may want to know more about who I am, my favorite book is The Book of Disquiet by Fernando Pessoa, a book I discovered when I participated in DisQuiet, an international literary program. It’s a book the author calls his “factless autobiography” and has a timeless quality I aspire to have in my own work. I try to find inspiration in the little things, like the leaf floating through the air or why that one book in your library smells like gasoline. 

I also am the cofounder of the Women of Color Writers’ Circle, which is an international group dedicated to showcasing and nurturing the voices of women of color. I haven’t thought of a solid NaNo project yet, but I have dozens of ideas floating in my head. 

Thanks for having me! I can’t wait to get started working with all my fellow word nerds.

Fatima, Tech Intern

Hey y’all!

My name is Fatima and I am super excited to be joining this amazing community as your fall tech intern. I am currently a junior at Cornell University majoring in Information Science and Sociology. I am studying remotely from Illinois this year, which means I am always a mess and in fear of missing a meeting. My classes are on Eastern Standard Time, this internship is on Pacific Standard Time, but I am living in Central Standard Time. Time zones are beating me up. (Fun fact: I learned about the existence of Mountain Standard Time at my first NaNoWriMo HQ meeting a few weeks ago)

I am passionate about racial and gender equity in tech and the intersections of the humanities with technology. On campus, I’m trying to start a Digital Humanities club and am involved in many womxn of color organizations. A few personal projects of mine currently are getting my email inbox down to 0 (last week it was 5,035, today it’s 3,454--progress!), finishing the Couch to 5K challenge (I'm on week 5), and finding out who Mary Alice really is on Desperate Housewives.

I say that I’ve been a Wrimo since I was 12, but I’ve only fully participated one year. I’ve tried to do different takes on the challenge like writing in my journal every day (very relaxing, definitely recommend) and writing a short story every day (was really hard to come up with new ideas and sadly I burnt out quickly). I also enjoy watching NaNoWriMo prep videos and vlogs on YouTube, introducing friends to NaNoWriMo, and following writing inspiration accounts on Instagram and Pinterest. I definitely talk about writing and call myself a writer more than I actually write but that will all change this November (hopefully)!

[benisasoftboi]

Unorganised thoughts on Trails of Cold Steel III:

...I’m gonna need like a week to process that

I guess I know why people hate George now!

Could really use a good old reset from KeA right now

This is the best game in the Cold Steel series so far. Easily

I... there’s no way they’re all really dead, right? This series has been completely toothless about killing anyone who isn’t a villain until now, no way they’re permanently killing someone who’s been here since practically day 1, no way. Show me a body

And even then I’ll doubt it with all these revivals happening all over the place 

‘He’s HIDING’ I sob as I apply clown make-up 

Ben Diskin did not need to go so hard on the voice acting at Millium’s death he did not need to do that to me

My god when Angie drove into the graveyard and my PS4 popped up a little notification telling me it was a blocked scene, the tension in me... and I never saw that coming, I’ll have to see if it was foreshadowed at all by replaying CS1 and 2 some time

I saw Lughman being a baddie a mile away (a mysterious professor turning out to be evil in a Trails game? UNPRECEDENTED!) but he’s Alisa’s dad!?

Neat writing trick actually, since they probably knew we’d guess the former, they blindside us with the latter

I can’t express how happy it made me that the Rufus battle was Machias Jusis Elliot. My dream team!

Estelle and Joshua got mentioned so much I figured they’d make a surprise appearance at the end and save the day

:(

So. Characters:

Rean: Rean is once again moderately more interesting than he was before, but still the least interesting person in the game. I guess he’s got some guilt that’s actually justified now, that’s cool? 

I ship him with Crow, not because the pairing really appeals to me that much, but because being shipped with Crow would totally piss Rean off and I find that extremely funny

His relationship with Altina is the best relationship he’s ever had with a female character and it is 100% because she’s the only girl he’s never ship teased with

(I don’t have an issue with the concept of ship tease itself, I have an issue with Rean-ship tease because 1. I still truly do not understand why so many girls like him so much and 2. None of it will ever canonically go anywhere)

(Seriously I’m so tempted to write a breakdown of why every other guy in Erebonia is more desirable than Rean)

Juna: I like Juna. I realised early on that she and Kurt remind me of Estelle and Joshua, without being carbon copies, and that’s good. I also think her relationship with Rean was really interesting - ‘I don’t know how to feel about you because you saved my life, but it also wouldn’t have needed saving if it weren’t for your country’s actions, which you’ve played a major role in - but now I’m being forced to confront that you’re a human being too’ is a really complicated situation for her. It’s a lot more interesting than ‘I don’t like you because you accidentally got a face full of chest’, Alisa

I also really liked using her, I ended up loading her with the Platinum Pecky Medal and defensive stuff, and she was a wall, she took an S-craft from Arianrhod in her stride! My buff girl!

She should’ve just been the new protagonist ngl

Kurt: Kurt had a lot to live up to, seeing as his brother is my favourite minor character. And oh does he succeed, Kurt is my favourite of New VII, he’s a good straight man, he’s great in battle, I like his arc, I like his friendship with Juna, I like Kurt

Altina: I was not sure about Altina just... being a student now. But damn if she didn’t have the best character arc in the game. I only did her final bonding event on a whim, but it’s the best one I saw. My girl Allie deserves the damn world

I really, truly believe those three have a bond as well, they’re very well written as a group. This was a problem I had with Old VII, the fact that so many of them just... didn’t have relationships with each other. How do, say, Fie and Machias feel about each other? I have no idea. But this group has a fantastic dynamic and it makes that ending so much more effective

It’s like I praised Crossbell for, really - having a small core group is much more manageable in terms of giving them all equal screen time and getting me to care about them

Musse: Uh, kind of one-note and annoying, honestly. I don’t hate her or anything, but like... she’s either Being Mysterious or Hitting On Her Teacher (I hate it I hate it so much). It’s just hard to care about someone who’s clearly so fake, I guess? I’m definitely interested in her, but like... I don’t really like her

Ash: Poor boy. I thought Ash was such an interesting character (and man do I love having someone around who does not like Rean, and never really changes his mind about it). Ash is very well done imo

Alisa: Alisa is good when the issue is her family drama, and is so goddamn boring when it comes to Rean. Nothing new there

Elliot: I love his little ponytail I love it he’s so cute I want to hug him so bad

Laura: Winner of the ‘best new outfit’ award (was never that fond of her war outfit, but this one is perfect). Still good, but not notably so. I feel so bad for Laura, she tries so hard to matter, but she’s by far the character you’d have the easiest time lifting out of the game

And while I love Elliot... same situation really. You could go back to the start and have one character named Elliaura who likes swords and music and has two big-shot dads, and you wouldn’t lose much

Machias: Took down Rufus, yeah, destroy your best friend (boyfriend)’s evil family! Winner of the ‘worst new outfit’ award, AGAIN. Also winner of ‘dorkiest S-craft’. I did his final bonding event first, and according to Playstation trophies it’s the least popular one! Stop sleeping on my boy Machias guys, I know he was annoying in the first game but I love him :(

Gaius: Special award to Gaius for finally being interesting! Boy’s a Gralsritter now, did not see that coming!

And of course it happened off screen. Because god forbid interesting stuff happen to Gaius when we’re actually around

Oh also goddamn, that is a beautiful man

Emma: Don’t really like the new outfit. It’s kind of remarkable that she’s so important but I keep forgetting she exists. Exposition witch who sometimes just doesn’t deliver the exposition I guess

Fie: Still my fav girl. Wish there had been more focus on her feelings about her dad coming back to life. Like that she’s a bracer

Jusis: Wasn’t sure how to feel about his newly close friendship with Millium because I was concerned that I was meant to ship it (by far my least favourite thing about this franchise is that that was not an unreasonable concern, as it wouldn’t even be the most inappropriate relationship in this game alone). Very, very glad it was confirmed sibling-y (not that it’s stopped them before). He didn’t really get to do anything else, sadly, but he’s good as always

I did the Purebread contest with him, and he made bread from coffee beans Machias gave him, the Ferdibert Fire Emblem energy- 

“What are you doing underneath this scarlet Pleroma Grass?”

Milliam: :(

Sara: Doesn’t get much to do because this cast is bloated but like, I still really like her :)

Towa: Someone needs to check on Towa all her friends are dead or evil the poor poor girl (or uh. I guess Crow isn’t... hmm.)

Angie :(

My kids Tita and Agate are back and completely overshadowed by people teasing this almost 30-year old man about being in love with a 17 year old that he’s only ever claimed to see as a sister, I swear to god

The orbal gear looks so goofy lol

Stop mentioning Schera as just being ‘totally here, just off screen, ha ha’ give her a model! Have her be here!

Don’t get me wrong, I loved seeing Josette again, I just don’t get... why? Why is she here?

Tio is back! And so is Randy, as a major character! I’m very very happy, I love them both

Michael’s fine, I guess? He’s kind of bland but I guess that’s kind of the point and I like him just fine. He serves his purpose well

I’ve never really liked Claire all that much, but she’s fine in this one again I suppose. A bit disappointed by the Lechter reveals really, I had expected more, to be honest

Aurelia is a fun character and I enjoy her as the principal. Want to see her fight Cassius

Want to see Cassius 

I love my girl Annabelle, but she’s the only reason I didn’t get all the character profiles (how was I meant to know I could even go to the highway at that point hmmm Falcom!?)

They picked a good selection of returning Thors students. Even Dorothee isn’t as annoying as she used to be. Hilarious that she’s the only one who didn’t get a profile

Juna gave a great big speech about how awesome the SSS are and namedrops everyone EXCEPT WAZY! My FAVOURITE Crossbell character! So offensive!

Oh speaking of offensive I took Machias to the Mishy show and was told he and Rean did a Mishy dance but they didn’t show it, what the hell-

Playable Olivier! Olivier back story! I could write a goddamn essay on why Olivier is such a great character. Glaring at you Falcom

I miss Mueller :(

Ada Grant is wonderful and I want better things for her

Rufus is a damn great villain just because of how much sense his actions suddenly make when you know that one little detail of him not actually being Jusis’s brother

I hate Cedric but like, in a way where I’m having fun hating him. That little bitch

Literally what do you even actually want Osbourne

I still cannot stand Elise. Something I realised playing this game is that one of the things that stops the Estelle and Joshua relationship from being as weird as it could be is that they don’t look at all alike, it’s very clear they’re not related in the slightest. Elise and Rean look like they really could be siblings, and come to think, so do Lloyd and Cecile. Which is also teased, to a lesser extent. It would be so much less uncomfortable if they just swapped Elise and Alfin’s models ngl (though still not good)

inb4 the final plot twist of the whole series is that Estelle and Joshua actually were biological siblings all along

This game looks so much better than its predecessors. Having the models being a little rounder and softer looking makes it look much more like an updated version of the original style than the complete departure that was CS1 and 2. Every time there was a flashback, Rean would be like ‘back then...’ and I’d feel compelled to say out loud ‘when we were shiny, and looked bad!’

‘Evil ancient magic corrupts people into making them do bad things!’ is... honestly a bit of a cop out that I did not expect from this series 

I found Rean telling Patrick ‘leave room for Aidios when dancing with my sister’ extremely funny. Rean would totally be a Christian summer camp counsellor in the real world

I honestly would have enjoyed it a lot more if Alfin decided to cause a scandal and have her first dance with Elise, but we can’t have such luxuries I suppose

When you get that book on dystopias, very clever to put the author on the last page. Seeing the name Gideon gave me such a start

Racquel was easily my fav new location

Leeves > Trista no doubt, maybe I’m just biased because it looks a lot like the village I grew up in but it’s just such a nicer design

Also the branch campus > main campus purely for being smaller, making the filler segments between field trips more bearable 

I prefer the longer but fewer chapters set-up, I think

There’s so many sad faces in this write up :( 

Back when I played Sky SC, I said something about how one of the themes is ‘you are not defined by your trauma’. I now think it would be more accurate to say that the theme of all the games (but especially the Sky arc) is ‘don’t let your worst experiences define you’

Because there are characters who define themselves by their traumas and worst experiences - and those characters are all villains, or miserable, or both. Like, they don’t phrase it as such, but the requirement to be an Ouroboros enforcer is ‘have trauma and define yourself by it’

And both Joshua and Renne’s arcs are about learning not to do that

Equally, the idea that ‘it’s much easier to not to define yourself by your trauma when you have a good support system that wants the best for you’ is a big theme as well

I just think that’s a really interesting idea for a JRPG series to tackle, idk

I can’t believe I’m at the last game! This series has been my life for the past near-half a year, what do I do when I finish it?

...go back and play Sky FC, maybe?

[batbirdies]

Alfred + Apples or Alfred + Jim Gordon, please? Thanks for all your lovely writing!

AO3 link

This work is part of a series, but can be read alone. Know that Apples is Jason’s 4 month old puppy.

______

It was a beautiful day out, was the first thing Alfred noted when the sun came up that morning. Unfortunately, as the morning wore on and grew warm enough he might think to spend it out in his greenhouse, it became apparent he could not.

Not after Cassandra had skipped into the kitchen to drink a glass of orange juice and take a protein bar. “Can you watch Apples?” She asked, making a point of swallowing her food before she spoke.

Alfred paused where he was kneading dough, preparing it to prove for the next few hours. He glanced up to find Jason standing a ways back, hovering in the doorway, and raised an eyebrow.

“She wants me to drive her to her dance class. I told her she had to ask you about Apples if she wanted me to. I’d just bring her, I did last time-“

“Someone is allergic.” Cassandra interrupted, setting down her empty glass and popping the last bite of her protein bar into her mouth.

Jason shuffled a little further into the room behind her with a small grimace. “Ended up having to sit in the car with her the whole time. And she’s still gets kinda anxious with that many strangers.”

Alfred looked at Cassandra then, whom he knew was perfectly capable of getting herself to her dance classes, and had for many months before Jason moved back in.

Of course her driving was rather terrifying and they encouraged her to avoid it whenever possible. But beyond that, it was something to get Jason out of the house, which he had been doing very little of as of late.

Alfred had invited him to the store with him a number of times and been politely turned down without exception. He would seem to consider it at first, to mull it over with cautious interest that would quickly diminish, morphing into something hesitant and nervous that he would hide and brush off as not thinking Apples was ready for an outing with so many people yet, or not wanting to leave her in the manor alone when the others were busy.

Of course then he would become overly quiet and obviously frustrated with himself, eventually retreating to his room or the library or risk snapping at one of his brothers or Bruce. Occasionally the cave for some exercise or the outdoors if the weather wasn’t too horrid. It always left Alfred feeling a little out of his depth. He was never one to push but he questioned if a little more encouragement might be a bigger help.

From him - perhaps not. But from Cassandra he thought it might be more successful.

He’d heard them discuss her classes before as well, and she seemed eager to share this with Jason of all of them; perhaps because she saw that he too could benefit in being reminded of the good and harmless things his body was capable of.

“Of course I don’t mind,” he replied in the end, letting go of the idea of spending a peaceful morning mostly outdoors. Cassandra’s class was two hours long and he didn’t doubt she would rope Jason into getting lunch afterward if all went well and truly, Alfred hoped it did. “I’m sure it would be no trouble.”

It was only eight thirty in the morning then, but Cassandra’s class started in just thirty minutes. And so Jason rushed around, getting Apples outside for the toilet before he hurried back inside, toeing his boots off noisily in the mudroom before darting into the kitchen with her. Claws clicked softly on the tile as he slid on his socked feet to the pantry.

He quickly filled her food dish and nearly slid it across the floor where it bumped into the side of the cabinet and spilled a few bits of kibble.

“Master Jason,” Alfred asked, a little exasperated, “are you truly in such a hurry that you cannot set down a food dish?”

“Sorry, I-“ Alfred looked up at the pause, hands still at work. “Don’t like to be late,” he said on a breath, followed by a soft grimace and stiff shoulders.

He was still quite nervous, Alfred realized, a dip of guilt in his chest before he shooed him with his flour coated hands.

“Well, go on then, we’ll be fine. Titus will keep her company, I’m sure I will barely be needed.”

Jason gave him a half smile, one of the crooked kind that always reminded him of when the boy was so much younger; when he first came to the manor and they had been small and unsure.

“I promise I won’t make it a habit of leaving her to you, she won’t need too much watching for much longer anyway and-“

“Master Jason really, I don’t mind at all. I’m glad to see you going out.”

Perhaps a bit too direct, he thought, at the ducked chin and shrugged shoulders. “She’s been asking me for weeks, trying to teach me stuff. I met one of her teachers there last time, they’re nice there. It...seems fun.”  

Alfred nodded, scooping the dough he was working into a ball and setting it gently in a metal bowl. “And you quite deserve it, I think. So go on, I promise I’m not bothered.”

Jason bumped a fist on top of the counter in quick succession, nervous energy leaking out. “Ok, one thing, she does need to take that med around 10-“

“I remember, it’s on the counter right over there, I will handle it.”

One last swallow and nod before he rubbed at the back of his neck and Alfred caught Cassandra’s shadow flit across the doorway; waiting out of sigh, no doubt.

Alfred put both hands on the sides of the bowl, looking up and making direct eye contact. “Master Jason, go have fun, please.”

This time his answering smile was wider, eyes crinkling just slightly at the edges. “Thanks, Alf.”

“You’re quite welcome.”

Cassandra peaked her head around the door just then, grinning when Jason turned around. “Come on, have to speed there.”

“I’m coming, I’ll get us there on time.”

And as Alfred went about covering his dough in cling wrap and a towel, setting it to prove near the stove top he glanced down at the puppy still working away at her breakfast, tail wagging happily.

She was quite sweet really. The only thing being, Alfred had yet to spend much time alone with her. It had been just shy of six weeks since she joined their family, and in such a short time she had lost much of her initial skittishness. They were even taking her out in public now, as Jason had mentioned. As long as one of the family was with her, she was much less nervous.

Alfred though, sadly, was probably her least favorite. Through no fault of his own, mind you. He was usually too busy working in some fashion to sit and properly introduce himself, and the boys and Cassandra always seemed intent on monopolizing her attention.

Of course, Alfred had lived an active life up to this point, and while he appreciated the vigor of a young puppy, he wasn’t sure he quite had the energy for one. Not the way these youngsters ran with her out doors, or played with her toys for hours on end. His best bet, he figured, would be to find Titus and have him run her around outside later.

For now, as she finished up her food, she came around the counter and trotted through the kitchen, around the island and nearly out into the dining room before he had to call her back. She came easily enough, though as Alfred started on cleaning up the counters and she sat down next to the rug he stood on, he thought she looked rather disappointed.

“He’ll be back soon, no need to pout.” At that, she laid down, feet sprawled across the tile, flat on her belly with her head resting on the floor. “Oh my, I dare say it won’t be so terrible without him for a few hours.”

Truly, at this point in his life, Alfred should have known better than to say any such thing.

    *

    Things started off a bit bumpy, but not so terrible.

Apples, by nature, didn’t like being left alone. The plus side to this was that it was never difficult to keep track of her. Without Jason or any of the others there, she didn’t venture anywhere she could not see him.

On the downside however, it was a little difficult to get certain things done.

While he found having a small shadow follow after him wherever he went reminiscent of days long past, the dog was not quite as good at staying out of the way as any of the children had been. He nearly tripped over her on three different occasions while attempting to dust in one of the hallways. This served the double purpose of being mildly frustrating as well as rather guilt inducing; as each time, the poor thing tucked her tail and ears down as if awaiting punishment.

When he knocked his elbow into an antique vase and nearly upended it in order to catch his balance he decided he would be better served to attempt the task later, when someone else was home to keep Miss Apples company.

The dough he’d been making earlier that morning still had plenty of time to prove, but he was never remiss in starting meal preparation early. If the children went out for lunch it generally meant they would be home for dinner and Master Damian had requested a vegetarian dish Alfred had yet to try his hand at. So he ventured back to the kitchen to peruse the recipe and do a bit of prep work.

As he fell into the rhythm of chopping vegetables and premeasuring spices he paused when he felt a weight fall over his feet. Glancing down, he found Apples laid out on the kitchen floor as she had been earlier that morning, but had rested her chin on his feet this time.

He was forced to stretch himself halfway across the counter in order to snag the salt from the top of the oven, but she was rather sensitive and he didn’t want her to think she was in any sort of trouble for it. He couldn’t help but find it rather endearing, even while it restricted his movement.

Thankfully, she seemed to become restless and bored after not too long, letting out little puppy huffs every now and then. So all he had to do was lean back from counter and ask, “Do you want to go outside?” And she was immediately up on her feet and wagging her tail.

“Yes, I can tell,” he mumbled to himself as he began resealing packages and returning items to their proper places until dinner time. “We’ll go find Titus, he can wear you out.”

Titus, though, while rising early to relieve himself and eat his breakfast, was generally back to sleep this time of the morning, and today was no exception. Any attempt to wake him had, so far, been unsuccessful.

Alfred would never admit to attempting to tip him out of his bed when no amount of calling and promises of treats would budge him. While his lack of success had something to do with it, he feared more that he might have strained his back in the attempt, and would rather not hear the uncomfortable speech from Bruce about his age. He was quite fine, thank you.

“Well then, you’ll have to settle for a peaceful walk around the grounds I’m afraid,” he tried not to grumble to the puppy, who’d stood by and barked a few times through Alfred’s efforts to wake the larger dog, but had been no help otherwise. She only wagged her tail now, ears raised as she followed him back down to the mud room.

Jason and the others would take her out in a jacket and no leash, letting her bound around and chase a ball and whatnot.

Alfred, though, was wary of doing so on his own, as she didn’t seem as attached to him as the others, and she was still a bit skittish. He worried something might spook her into running off and he wouldn’t be quick enough to follow after her. And so he went about the trouble of fitting her into her harness, pulling her little padded rain jacket over her head before slipping his own coat and hat on, latching her leash to the harness - and then remembering her medication, sitting on the counter in the kitchen.

“Oh my,” he said to himself, glancing at the clock above the back door. It was a quarter past 10. He hesitated, unsure how long they would be outside but not wanting to risk the delay, though he knew it wouldn’t be long, he went ahead and pulled his boots back off and walked the poor thing back into the kitchen.

It was only an antibiotic, one prescribed after Damian insisted the skin issue she came to them with was not healing properly and they’d managed to have a vet to the house. The privileges of the wealthy and all.

Jason had seemed to be torn between exasperation at the luxury of it, and gratefulness at not having to either go out with her himself, or force her into the universally dreaded environment of the veterinarian’s office.

She was only a few days into the prescription and he really should have read the directions on the bottle, or even simply recounted his own extensive medical knowledge and given it to her with a scoop of kibble, or some other snack. But he did not. Instead, he shook a pill out of the bottle and pressed it into a small piece of cheese before feeding it to her.

But in that moment, none of those things occurred to him, he only shuffled her back into the mud room, and out the back door.

It was rather snowy out, and would likely stay that way for another month before they saw the ground again, but there was a cleared and paved path that wound around the gardens and Alfred took her along that way. It was very brisk, and he tugged his hat low over his ears as they walked, at least enjoying the sun though he thought he may not have spent much time in his gardens after all, not in this chill.

Apples trotted out ahead of him, sniffing at the air and the snow at the edge of the path, rushing side to side in a zig-zag pattern while Alfred took a much more sedate pace behind her.

He did let her into the snow a bit, so that she wouldn’t wee on the pavement, but of course she discovered a hidden tennis ball buried in the snow and rushed back to him with it, wagging her tail insistently. Alfred sighed, eyeing the snow covered land around them. It was unlikely something would frighten her, really, and he could at least do this much.

“Well alright, if you insist.” He bent down, with a little difficulty, his back twinging in warning when he was just a few inches from the ball. He lowered himself very slowly the rest of the way, tugging Apples over while he was already low to the ground and unlatching her leash. He stood back up with careful movements, but seemed alright when he was back to standing.

To hell with age, he thought, as he tossed the ball out into the snow. It wasn’t nearly as far as any of the children would throw it, nor Bruce, but he did not want to put anymore strain on his spine than necessary, just to be safe. Apples didn’t seem to mind as she went bounding after it, only to return in short order, ready for another go.

He consciously loosened his stance before bending down the next time and was relieved to feel no answering twinge. They went about it for just a few short minutes before Apples seemed to have enough, only following the ball with her eyes the last time he threw it before sitting down at his feet and looking up at him.

“Done already are you? All the better for me I suppose.”

He took her a bit further out on the path, waiting until she at least relieved herself before he led them both back inside.

It was then that things went drastically downhill. He went about removing his hat and coat, and then carefully bent down to take off Apples’ coat and harness and untie his shoes. After removing one and setting it near the door, he heard a distinct sound that had him turning around more sharply than he should have.

Before he could make a move to do a thing about it, Apples had retched all over the floor. “Oh dear.”

He made to take a step toward her but that proved to be a mistake when she  cringed down and away from him.

“No-“ he cut himself off before he could finish as her paws went right through her sick, causing her to lose traction all together and slip, sliding her front half straight across it.

With lips pressed thin, Alfred stood very still, one shoe still on. He took a breath, feeling a painful clenching in his chest as he watched her scramble back to her feet and huddle against the wall.

“It’s alright,” he tried to soothe, still not making a move to get any closer. “It’s nothing to be so upset about.” Kneeling down very carefully again, he patted his leg, keeping his voice low and soft. “Apples, come, it’s alright, I promise. You’re in no trouble at all. Come here, please.” He could see her shaking as she finally shuffled across the floor to him, belly low to the ground, tail between her legs, making a wide arch around the mess still on the floor. When she finally came near and he cautiously began to reach forward she rolled over, exposing her stomach, throat bared.

It broke his old-soft heart.

“You poor dear,” he mumbled under his breath. He wasn’t quite sure where to reach, as there was damp-yellow sick pressed into nearly all of her exposed fur.  

After a moment of glancing around he grabbed the spare rag the boys had been using to clean the dog’s feet off and slowly settled it over the mess that was her fur. He tried to gently tug her back to rights but the very action sent her scrambling back to her feet, forcing him to grab her around the middle to stop her from potentially running into the main house covered in vomit.

“Shh, shh, it’s alright.” He soothed, tucking her up to his side, attempting to hold the towel in place to avoid any transfer. He could hear her wheezed breathing, feel how stiff her muscles were in his grip, though she didn’t make a sound.

And so he sat for quite some time, kneeling on one knee in the mud room, with one untied shoe on, and a half grown puppy covered in sick, stroking down her back; about the only clean spot on her.

She did calm down a little after a while, turning her attention to licking at his trousers when she couldn’t reach his hands, as if apologizing. Sadly, there was no way to avoid a bath for her. Thankfully, they were already in the perfect location for one.

There was a large sink up against one wall with an assortment of bottled soaps sat next to it and a stack of towels on a shelf underneath. She would hate it, he thought, and likely be terrified of him for the foreseeable future but there was nothing else for it.

Carefully, he adjusted his grip around her center, shifting the towel once more before he stood up, an alarming zing running up his spine at the movement. He gasped in a breath himself and held very still, only relaxing after enough time had passed and no other pain followed. He walked her over to the sink and more crouched than bent over to set her down.

Removing the towel he made sure she wasn’t likely to climb right out of the sink and stepped briefly away to take care of the mess on the floor. He heard her claws scraping up the bottom of the sink and soft whining breaths, but she didn’t bark.

Alfred steadfastly did not bend to wipe up the floor, instead squatting in an awkward pose and using the already dirtied towel to wipe up the rest of the sick. He would mop later.

The laundry room was just through the doorway and he took only a split second to deposit the towel in the dirty hamper before he kicked off his remaining shoe and returned to the sink. The poor thing was shaking and when he turned on the water it only got worse.

“I promise it will be quick and painless,” he tried to soothe, holding his hand under the stream and waiting for it to warm up. “You’ll right as rain as soon as this is done with and you’ll feel so much better, I promise.”

He did his level best to avoid getting water in her face, moving the spray nozzle to primarily soak her chest and belly before squeezing out some soap and scrubbing it into the dirtied fur. She endured admirably, all things considered, though she continued to retreat to the back of the sink each time he lifted his hands away. “I know, I am your very least favorite person in the world right this moment, but you’ll be so much happier when you’re clean.”

It didn’t take very long, really. He scrubbed and rinsed her twice, paying special attention to her feet the second time around. He managed to shield himself from her full body shake by grabbing a towel just in time and quickly draped it over her, giving her a good scrub with it. “There, it’s already so much better, isn’t it?”

Trouble came a second time when he attempted to lift her out of the tub. His back seized immediately, stars dancing in his vision causing him to nearly drop her and leaving him frozen, half bent over with her wrapped in a towel in his arms. She squirmed just slightly, tail whipping out the bottom of the towel and Alfred mentally cursed his old bones and bad timing.

Putting her on the floor was what did it in the end. The moment he knew he’d pushed things too far and the insistent stabbing pain up through his low back made him gasp, quickly reaching out to grip the edge of the sink. Apples was busy divesting herself of the towel while he underwent the mental math of his next moves.

He needed to sit down, number one, but he needed to take a muscle relaxant first or he would only stiffen up the longer he stayed still. And perhaps an ice pack, he thought.

Walking into the kitchen, back bent at a 45 degree angle, he spared a split second to be thankful no one was there to witness it. Though, if someone had been, he would not be in this predicament to start with.

He had to pause in the doorway from the laundry room, breathing shallow. “You foolish old man,” he muttered under his breath, bracing himself for the last shuffle to the medicine cabinet and the awkward reach he had to make without being able to stand up straight. He swallowed the pill dry rather than bother with getting a glass of water.

After the grueling process of getting an ice pack from the freezer door he was left with the question of where to retire. He wanted nothing more than to retreat to his own rooms, wait out the pain in his back until the relaxants took affect and he could move easily enough to attempt to work out the muscles. But he would have to bring Apples with him, and the others wouldn’t look for him in his rooms.

If they did, it would be because they assumed something was wrong when they couldn’t find him in the main house.

It would worry Jason more than he was willing to, even for his own pride. And so he shuffled into one of the lower level entertainment rooms, not wanting to even risk the stairs. He was afraid initially that Apples would attempt to hide, but she steadfastly followed after him, even after he’d put her through such suffering.

“You are quite a loyal thing, aren’t you?” He mumbled aloud as he very slowly lowered himself onto the couch.

It took some shifting around, but he managed to get the ice pack tucked behind him, pressed into the tight, angry muscles of his low back. The remote, thankfully, was sat precisely in the center of the armrest he sat closest to and as he relaxed, and settled back into the cushions, he turned on the television, hoping for something he could fall asleep to.

Apples had followed him all the way to the couch and only hesitated for a moment before she jumping up after him. She was shivering still, though he hoped it was more from the cold of being wet now than from fear.

Though it wasn’t the more lived in portion of the manor, there was at least a throw blanket draped across the back of the couch and even as restricted as his movement currently was he was able to drag it down and wrap the poor thing up.

“There you are,” he said, running a gentle hand over her head, the only part of her body still exposed. She folded down next to him then, resting her chin on  his thigh this time.

“You still like me after all that, do you?” He could feel the dampness from her fur soaking through his trouser leg slowly, but it was nothing to be bothered with now. Her brown eyes turned to look up at him, a little shiver running through her frame before she burrowed just a little closer. “Well I suppose the feeling is mutual.”

Alfred tucked the blanket in tightly around her, settling one hand on her back as his heart squeezed that little bit. Jason would likely be furious with the comparison but he couldn’t help but be reminded of the boy when he’d first come to the manor.

He distinctly remembered an instance in his early days there, when he’d been in the kitchen with him, trying to help with dinner. Somehow he had spilled a pot of spaghetti sauce and he’d been so panicked to clean it up he’d burned himself badly on the pot and had to be coaxed into just letting either him or Bruce look at his hands. He’d spent over an hour stiff and wide eyed continuing to insist it was an accident repeatedly, as if they didn’t believe him.

Alfred had been concerned it would cause backsliding, more fear, but as the evening wore on and it became apparent there would be no expected punishment he’d ended the night pressed up again Bruce’s side on the couch in the den, watching a movie. It was closer contact than Alfred had seen Jason volunteer for up to that point and it warmed his heart and made it ache all in one; the way he was so cautious but so hungry for safety and love.

He’d never quite lost that caution.

As Alfred tried to ease his sore muscles, running a hand down Apples’ blanketed back and feeling the pull of drowsiness as the muscle relaxants began to take effect, he hoped that she might, and that perhaps in time Jason would as well. They were quite a perfect pair, weren’t they?

    *

    When Bruce arrived home early from WE, he had expected to find both Alfred and Jason home, but when he came into the kitchen through the garage, it was quiet and empty. But that didn’t seem quite right, because the car Alfred usually took into town was still parked in the garage. The one Cass took to her dance classes was gone, but Alfred rarely drove her and when he did, he took his own car, not hers.

And none of that explained where Jason was.

“Alfred? Jay?” He called as he set his briefcase down on the dining room table. It was a long shot, in the manor, likely he would have to do a search by foot.

Jason’s room was empty, as was the den, and when he looked out at the grounds from his bedroom balcony they appeared empty as well. He checked his phone briefly, to see if anyone sent him an update, but there was nothing. They hadn’t been expecting him home yet so he supposed that wasn’t a bad sign per se, but it still left him feeling vaguely uneasy.

He shot a quick text to Jason, to be safe, as he continued through the house, spotting Titus at the foot of the main stairwell as he ventured back down. It was possible Alfred was out in the greenhouse but Bruce now wondered where Apples was too. He supposed he could have taken her with him out there but in the current weather even that would be rather cold for any extended period of time.

“Where is everyone Titus?” He mused when he hit the ground floor, only for the dog to turn and trot down a hall toward the lesser used parts of the manor where they might set up guests if they had any. “What are you-“

Titus had no reason to venture down those halls on his own, and all the doors would be closed anyway, unless someone was down there.

“Alfred?” Bruce called again as he began to follow. Perhaps he had decided to deep clean the lesser used space. Except that the further down the hall he traveled he began to hear something that sounded distinctly like a television, some sort of commercial playing.

He spotted Titus slipping into an open door and followed on silent feet.

What he found left him nearly speechless and warmed from the inside.

Alfred sat on the couch, propped up straight with his head tilted up, resting on the back on the couch, eyes closed, one hand on the remote, the other on Apple’s back where she lay curled up next to him with her head on his leg. Titus had folded himself down in front of the couch, head up and watching Bruce. Quietly he pulled his phone out, but before he even raised it completely he was interrupted.

“If you take that picture you will find your phone missing in short order,” Alfred mumbled to the ceiling before his eyes slit open just enough to give him a soft glare. Bruce suppressed a smile as best he could, but didn’t lower his phone.

“Turnabout is fair-play,” he said, tapping the shutter release.

[melan-cauli]

Questions

1. What was the name of the first person you ever had a crush on? Why did you like them?

I was in kindergarten and his name was Eddy. I liked him because our cubbies were next to each other. haha.

2. What is one thing you regret having done or not done in your life?

I try not to regret things, but I feel like I regret times where I wasn’t the best friend to people-- when I let my mental health take over and isolate me, causing me to ghost some people I cared about. 

3. Which parent do you identify with the most?

My mom, definitely. I love her with my entire being (not to mention I don’t have a great relationship with my dad), but even beside that, I have a lot of her mannerisms and her exact sense of humor. 

4. What do you think you cook or bake the best?

I am not big on cooking or baking; it’s just not something I have a lot of skill and practice in. I am good at making banana bread and taco dip!

5. If you could change your first name what would it be?

I really don’t know if I would change my name, but maybe I would choose something that allowed for more nicknames, like Charlotte.

6. Can you hula hoop?

I haven’t in a long time, but yes I can... and now I want to go hula-hoop, haha. 

7. What embarrasses you the most in front of other people?

I am so beyond easily embarrassed, but it really all comes down to talking. I feel like I am not very eloquent, so when I ramble often or misspeak, I get really down on myself and assume everyone has become mad at me or thinks I am stupid. 

8. Have you considered running for president?

Not in any serious manner, no. I don’t think I would have the right stamina and energy for it. I have strong beliefs, but as I mentioned before, I get embarrassed just by speaking and I would get so frustrated trying to debate people who cannot articulate ideas well or who refuse to listen. 

9. If you had to choose one thing you were most passionate about, what would it be and why?

Writing. It is the one thing in my life that I have ever felt confident in, and I have been drawn to it since I was just a little kid. There is nothing about writing that I don’t love, and it is the easiest way for me to communicate in both a straight-forward manner and a creative one. 

10. Who are you most envious of—real or fictional—and why?

I don’t really have particular people that I envy. I suppose I just envy people who have got control of their mental health issues and who can articulate it in a healthy manner, but that is something I am getting better at and working toward!

11. Where is the most beautiful place on earth and why?

That’s a really hard question-- as beauty is subjective and there are soooo many gorgeous places. I would personally say Germany. I say that because of its history, architecture, art, landscape, etc. I just kind of love the idea of the country, and I would love to visit one day. 

12. Are ghosts real?

I am a firm believer in ghosts. Yes.

13. Are aliens real?

100% I think it is naïve to believe that there is no other life form out there when our galaxy is so vast. 

14. How old is the most expired item in your fridge?

They are no longer in my fridge, but my strawberries went bad yesterday... Sadly. 

15. What are your favorite style of underwear?

Hipster!

16. What’s the saddest song you’ve ever heard?

There are so many, but the first one that came to mind was Hyperballad by Whitley (originally by Bjork)

17. How about the sweetest song?

Metaphors by Keaton Henson

18. Do you know how to play dominoes?

I have no idea. I have always owned dominoes, and my grandparents played, but I was never taught.

19. What’s under your bed?

A cat toy in the shape of an avocado 

20. Have you ever prank called someone?

So many times. It was my friends and my favorite pastime growing up. It was all always friendly and just ridiculous. 

21. 100 kittens or 3 baby sloths?

100 Kittens. I love little baby cats, and cats in general-- they are so sweet and snuggly. I miss when my family cat had kittens; they were so fun to take care of. 

22. Are you proud of what you’re doing with your heart and time right now?

I’m trying to be. I am trying to acknowledge my successes and be proud of my progress. 

23. Why or why not?

I have a good job in my field, I have dedicated all my time to working on my mental health, and I am trying to put myself first for once, so I am trying to acknowledge the good in all of that. It’s just always been hard for me to do so. 

24. How many bones have you broken?

None (knock on wood)

25. Have you ever won anything? Big or small?

I won third place in state-wide writing competition in the third grade, and a Student Writing Award in college.

26. If you could buy one material thing, and money was not an issue, what would it be?

A house. I just want a place that is all my own-- it doesn’t have to be big or anything, I just want to own my dwelling. 

27. What’s your favorite movie from your childhood?

I would say Ever After (even though Forrest Gump is my favorite movie and has been since childhood). I just have so many memories with my mom watching that movie, and I love Drew Barrymore. 

28. What food will you absolutely not, under any circumstances, eat?

Oysters. No way in hell.

29. What’s the best way to comfort you when you’re having a really terrible day?

Take me on a long car ride and just let me stare out the window. 

30. Has anything/anyone ever saved your life before?

Not in a dramatic way, but yes, plenty of people have through different emotional ways.

31. Would you ever adopt a child?

I don’t want children, but I have never been opposed to adopting. I used to want to adopt when I was younger and thought I wanted kids, actually. 

32. What is one thing you’re embarrassed to admit you want to try?

Learning to roller skate

33. If you were a cake which cake would you be?

Cheesecake! Not everyone’s taste, but still delicious. 

34. What is the most important material possession you have and why?

I am not super attached to material items, but probably my over-shirt that use to belong to my grandmother; it is one thing I own that has deep-rooted sentimental value. 

35. What is the most important memory you have and why?

I think most memories are of equal importance, but one of my favorites is of when my cousins and I used to get together in the fall and do yard work for my grandma. They were long days, but everyone was happy, we were together, we had good food, and my family members weren’t sick... 

36. When was the last time you cried?

Thursday

37. How old was your mother when she had you?

She was 31

38. Which famous person would you like to be BFFs with?

I think I would mesh really well with Julien Baker

39. Is there something you wish you had said sorry for but never did?

Over the years, I have actually reached out to the people I thought I needed to apologize to, so I have made my peace with all of this. 

40. Have you been on your first date? If so, how did it go?

I have been. It was nice and outdoorsy, but it was also a bit awkward because we didn’t know what to talk about most of the time (and the memory was spoiled a day or two after)... 

questions credited to @itakesurveys

[ranma-rewatch]

Episode 16: Shampoo's Revenge! The Shiatsu Technique That Steals Heart and Soul

I can’t believe it, 2020 is finally over. Or at least, it will be on the day this goes up. From where I’m writing it, we’re nearing the finish line, but haven’t yet reached it. Part of me wishes I could have finished season 1 in the same year I started this blog, but I’m getting close to there anyway, so I shouldn’t despair. This episode...yeah, looking at the episode title, I cannot remember for the life of me what the Shiatsu Technique is. By next paragraph, I’ll have rewatched the episodes, and I’ll know. See you in a second!

That was an...interesting direction for Shampoo’s introductory arc? I mean, it’s her second episode, and she’s barely in it. I think I’ll have quite a bit to talk about, but I will say once again I’m holding off on doing a Shampoo Character Spotlight just yet, just because I want to have more material to discuss.

So, anyway, the episode starts with the Tendo’s asking Akane to wake up Ranma, and it’s made clear once again just how angry and jealous she is over the whole Shampoo situation. That doesn’t get any better when she relents but finds that Shampoo is snuggling in Ranma’s bed with him, without him knowing. She dumps water on them, activating the curse, Shampoo tries to kill Ranma, he turns back, she wants to kiss him, it’s a bunch of hijinks.

As Ranma and Akane walk to school, they bicker a little more fiercely than usual, now that the spectre of Shampoo’s affections have come into the picture. Ryoga is chilling on a nearby rooftop, and he’s actually ready to leave. He’s being very angsty, upset that Akane only likes him as P-chan, and knows that if Akane ever admits to loving Ranma, it would break his heart. He tries to head back on the road, only for him to get hit by random water throwing lady’s water, at which point Shampoo finds the piglet in the road.

Next scene, the amazon breaks down the wall of Ranma’s classroom to give him lunch, which as it turns out is Ryoga, though he hasn’t been killed or ever really cooked. Still, Akane and even Ranma are concerned, even if Ryoga doesn’t really appreciate the latter. Angry at Akane ruining her plans for Ranma several times now, Shampoo gives Akane the Kiss of Death, but Akane doesn’t back down, and is ready for a match, despite the fact that Ranma seems absolutely sure that Akane has no way of winning.

By the time Ranma gets to the place they are fighting at, the match is already over. Shampoo is gone, and Akane is unconscious on the ground. When she wakes up, she feels rather refreshed, but is more than anything confused: Akane has no clue who Ranma is. It isn’t regular amnesia, either. She still remembers her classmates, Ryoga, even Ranma’s dad.

After a lot of Ranma trying over and over again to remind Akane who he is, which even fails when Ranma activates his curse, they eventually go to Dr. Tofu. As it turns out, he knows what did this: the titular Shiatsu Technique. It actually has a much longer name, but I will stick with that. Anyway, Ranma’s dad was passing by and saw the whole thing. The move is actually just washing and styling the person’s hair, but using specific herbs and massaging scalpel pressure points to specifically remove memories of a single person.

The only way Dr. Tofu can imagine curing it would be with more Chinese herbs, so Ranma takes Akane out on the city to try and find Shampoo and get what they need. Only thing is, Shampoo shows up at the clinic right afterwards, because it turns out she’s been living there, working with Dr. Tofu.

So, that’s the episode. I’m going to start with some things I didn’t like as much, before getting into what I thought actually worked. The entire premise is just a bit...odd? Like, I have to admit I’m kind of down on amnesia plots in general, just as a matter of personal preference, but even if I wasn’t I feel like using one in the middle of a main character’s introduction arc is a tad bit strange.

I talked a bit last week about how I find that shows using jealousy as a way to show much a person cared about another is kinda sucky, so I won’t go over it again, except to say I’m still not a fan. I’m even less a fan of the fact that Akane is still being looked over as a fighter. First she never really got to fight Kodachi, and now that Shampoo is here they get...a fight we don’t see that only lasts a few seconds.

Shampoo is an amazon warrior, I get that. But I just find it annoying that they completely sideline that conflict for the amnesia one, when giving Akane an opponent to fight who is better than her would be a great way to make her grow. Even if we got a real fight and she lost, it could be something to build on later, a way to see where Akane is as a martial artist. Sadly, this series doesn’t really take Akane seriously as a martial artist, so that wasn’t ever going to happen.

Only other small thing to cover in the negatives column is that I didn’t really like the whole comedy bit of, “Uh oh, Ranma shows Akane his curse, but she thinks he’s a cross-dressing pervert!” It’s just...yeah, I don’t have the mental energy to dive into that topic, let’s just say it left a very bad taste in my mouth.

So, what did I like about the episode, then? Well, quite a lot. As much as I dislike the general idea of doing an amnesia plot here, I liked some of the specifics of it. The fact that not only had Akane forgotten Ranma, and only Ranma, but that it seemed as though she couldn’t even form new memories of him, no matter how much he or others tried to make her understand, definitely added urgency. In a good way.

I also found myself liking the technique itself, strangely enough. The fact it’s just washing the person’s hair, but with special martial arts stuff, is just kind of amazing, ridiculous in that exact Ranma 1/2 kind of way. The fact that all of the characters treat it dead seriously, none of them laughing at the idea, also helps make it even funnier.

Speaking of funny, the slapstick was pretty on-point this episode. It wasn’t quite as funny as some other episodes, but I definitely was at least smiling for a good portion of it. The whole scene of their class trying to help Akane remember Ranma was pretty funny too, in English and Japanese.

For something more heartfelt, I love that after half an episode of Ranma teasing Akane, of so many episodes of Ranma kind of being a jerk, his immediate response to her forgetting him is to do everything he can to fix it. It goes uncommented on so far, but he clearly hates the idea of Akane never knowing who he is. It could just as easily have been done with Ranma not caring in the slightest, being an aloof jerk, but this shows that Ranma does genuinely care about Akane, even if he often has a bad way of showing it.

Ooh, also, on the characters front! Ryoga! My boy! I haven’t really talked about it in a while, but I’ve been kind of unhappy with how Ryoga is being portrayed for a while now. Ever since his arc, he’s just been chilling as P-chan, only turning back to try and take Akane from Ranma in some way. He’s been very scheming and underhanded, which doesn’t fit what I remembered of his character at all.

This episode was much more like it. Ryoga fits so much better as the brooding boy, stuck in the moral dilemma of what to do about his position with Akane, scared of how she might really feel. More of this, please, and less of him making schemes to steal her.

So then, how does this episode shake out, on the whole? Well, I don’t think it’s a surprise that I wouldn’t say it’s as good as last week’s. In fact, it’s dropped quite a few places. Just barely in the top half of episodes I’ve seen thus far, I’m putting this episode just above the Ranma vs Ryoga fight and one spot below the big fight that ended Kodachi’s arc. So, here is the new ranking.

Episode 7: Enter Ryoga, the Eternal ‘Lost Boy’

Episode 12: A Woman's Love is War! The Martial Arts Rhythmic Gymnastics Challenge!

Episode 15: Enter Shampoo, the Gung-Ho Girl! I Put My Life in Your Hands

Episode 9: True Confessions! A Girl's Hair is Her Life!

Episode 2: School is No Place for Horsing Around

Episode 6: Akane's Lost Love... These Things Happen, You Know

Episode 13: A Tear in a Girl-Delinquent's Eye? The End of the Martial Arts Rhythmic Gymnastics Challenge!

Episode 16: Shampoo's Revenge! The Shiatsu Technique That Steals Heart and Soul

Episode 8: School is a Battlefield! Ranma vs. Ryoga

Episode 11: Ranma Meets Love Head-On! Enter the Delinquent Juvenile Gymnast!

Episode 4: Ranma and...Ranma? If It’s Not One Thing, It’s Another

Episode 5: Love Me to the Bone! The Compound Fracture of Akane's Heart

Episode 1: Here’s Ranma

Episode 3: A Sudden Storm of Love

Episode 10: P-P-P-Chan! He's Good For Nothin'

Episode 14: Pelvic Fortune-Telling? Ranma is the No. One Bride in Japan

Next week, I think we’re finishing this arc? I’m not completely sure? We’ll have to see? All I know is, the penultimate episode of the season is titled “I Love You, Ranma! Please Don’t Say Goodbye”. Sadly, unlike Ranma, I do have to say goodbye, but only until next week. See you all then!

[vividreminisce]

I Want - Chapter 2

Here’s the second chapter to my series, “I Want”. Thank you so, so much for all of the reception that I received from the first chapter! It makes me very happy to see that people enjoyed it and that there’s still some activity here in Tumblr, haha. I’ll keep posting chapters here, so please stick around!

Also, I have this series finished in ao3, so if you’d like to read all of them in one go, hop on over there and give it a read! I also gave shoutouts to authors, works, and artists that really inspired me for this series after each chapter. I feel like there’s not enough attention/shoutouts to content creators, and when I finished this series, I vowed to do that from so many of them inspiring me and giving all of us gifts for free. Still not sure if I’ll do the same on this platform, but that’s another thought for another time.

Before we continue, this chapter was written and posted before the Shadowbringers artbook, so some of the content on here will be incorrect, if you can find it, haha. Don’t want to spoil it, so I’ll keep it vague and if you can’t find it but are curious, reply to this post or send me a message and I’d love to speak about it :)

Here’s Chapter 1 if you missed it!

If you’d like to see some screenshots of A’viloh, here they are! Excuse the crappiness, I’m not the best with gpose, haha.

Okie dokie, let’s get this show on the road! Below are the tags, chapter summary, and story! Please enjoy :)

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

Chapter Summary: Finally arriving at the Crystarium, the Warrior of Darkness prepares to heal his friend, some companions helping him start the process.

Fandom: Final Fantasy XIV

Ship: G’raha Tia/Crystal Exarch x OC

Rating: Mature, SFW

Writing Tags: Some depictions of medical procedures (not medically trained, some factors will be medically incorrect, but it’s all for the story), Slow burn, Angst, Hurt, Healing, Comfort, Acceptance, Fluff.

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

“A’viloh… are you absolutely certain…?”

“I will be fine, Alphinaud. My wounds are starting to mend, and I have the energy to keep going.”

Everything that the Warrior of Darkness had instructed had thankfully gone according to plan. Lyna did have soldiers posted at each entrance to the crystal city and the ones at the Amaro launch were overjoyed at seeing the twins descend. Y’shtola and Urianger were quickly taken by Chessamile and the other healers, while Alisaie preferred to take her time walking there. Her brother could only shake his head at how stubborn she was to the very end, but she was quickly carried to an empty bed once the eldest healer saw her limping into the Spagyrics. By the time A’viloh and G’raha had arrived, Lyna was waiting for them, along with the Overseers of the city. The Warrior of Darkness shared a few words with them, telling them that he would bring the Exarch to the Tower and care for him there, and let them know of his progress as time went on. The ride to the Crystarium gave him ample time to check his wounds via healing magic (bless having his soul stones on hand rather than his bag), the damage not being as severe as he originally thought. He was grateful for the hood that obscured his friend’s face, though from their expressions, they knew of their leader’s condition. Still, they would not question the hero’s reasoning, that being on the perks that A’viloh was grateful for.

He followed the Captain up the stairs of the Dossal Gate and she opened the door without another word. They swiftly ascended the stairs to the Ocular and used the key that the Exarch bestowed to Lyna to open the room where A’viloh had the vision of the Exarch’s plans. Surveying the room, he was surprised at seeing a bed in the corner, somehow missing it when he first went in. When Lyna saw the Warrior’s surprised expression, she explained in not so many words that she found it when moving some of the Exarch’s books. Not one to question, he nodded and went to lay his friend on it. The Exarch’s breathing was still rasped, but it was much deeper, relieving the Warrior. Having felt his quick breathing against his back as they flew more than unnerved him, that being enough to realize how close the Exarch was to losing his life. Sharing a look with Lyna, he explained how the Exarch did not want to reveal his face to his people, at least not yet. He further explained that he had asked the Exarch permission to heal him, which was granted to him. A’viloh would have continued were it not for Lyna lifting a hand up to stop him. Her pink eyes never left the Exarch’s hooded face, his breathing almost deafening, despite the sound barely reaching the door.

“You have more than proven yourself to the people of Norvrandt, Warrior. If I may speak on behalf of the people of the Crystarium… do all that you can to make him as hale as he was when he left these walls. Any materials that you need, they will be yours. He is our first priority and always will be.” Despite how clear her words were, her expression said otherwise. She wanted to be strong for the Exarch… for her paternal family member. She needed to be strong. But it was so hard when she saw him in that state. What happened to have left him so weak? What little skin she could see, there was blood, dirty, sand, and wounds. His sandals had come undone, the leather straps on his left arm were slipping off, and whatever God was out there would know if his tunic could be mended. She forced her gaze back to the Warrior, stepping closer to speak for his ears only.

“He trusts you more than anyone else I know. As do I. So please… please see to him. Call me whenever you wish, and I will come running. Ask anything of me, and I will do it. It is the least I…  could do for the one that I see as family. If I can see the smile that he gave your way the first time that he laid eyes on you once more… That will be all that I will ever need in my lifetime.” The Captain finished.

A’viloh didn’t know whether to give Lyna a handkerchief from the tears that spilled at that revelation, or embrace her in reassurance. That look in her eyes told him that she needed none of those and only wanted to say her piece; she wanted to say that to him before he left to rescue the Exarch, and now she could. Schooling back his expression, he nodded and promised what was in his heart and mind. Using the back of a parchment that he found on the floor (which he hoped was to be tossed), he wrote down everything that he needed for the time being, along with what could be brought early in the morning. Lyna assured him that he would have the latter in no more than 2 bells and that she would personally bring the former in less than 1. It was in the middle of the first one that A’viloh had the brilliant idea of trying out the Linkpearl to speak with the male Leveilleur. It thankfully worked and they spoke in length of what had transpired when him and Alisaie arrived.

“I understand that the Exarch trusts you, as do we, my friend, but you shouldn’t heal him on your own… Is there naught that the chirugeons here can do…?”

“From what I can see, we should not worry as much about what can be seen. There are some cuts that I can disinfect and bandage up myself. What I am more worried about is…” A’viloh trailed off. His hand was on G’raha’s ankle, having taken off his sandals as soon as Lyna had left the room. The bed was nothing grand, only fitting one body and having a single sheet and pillow. It had some dust, most likely from the books that Lyna lifted off, but it sufficed for the time being. A’viloh sat at the very edge of the bed, not wanting to take up any more space than necessary. He knew that the leader needed to be in the Tower from how linked they were to one another, but he wasn’t entirely sure how; and he didn’t want to disrupt that flow.

Alphinaud noticed his friend’s silence, understanding his hesitation. That scene was one that everyone wished they could forget. How the Exarch was more than willing to give up his life for the Warrior to be relieved of the Light. How Emet-Selch appeared, and stopped those actions, but at the cost of a bullet to the back. Alphinaud knew of the man’s crystal condition, and he suspected it was the crystal that saved his life. As far as he knew, that bullet was still embedded there…

A’viloh blinked when the Elezen’s quiet question came through the linkpearl. “Do you perchance know how deep the wound is…?” Slowly getting off the bed, his hand came up behind the sleeping miqo’te, pressing down on the cushion as he leaned over to try to get a better look at the wound. A sharp exhale came out, not being able to see much of the wound from the fabric sticking close to the found. Running a hand through his brown hair, he carefully sat back down, hand coming back to rest on his friend’s cold ankle.

“I unfortunately cannot. I am waiting on Lyna to come back with the immediate medical supplies before I undress him. She will be coming any moment, and I do not want to keep you from resting. Before I forget… Alphinaud, please, do not tell anyone of the Exarch’s appearance, nor his name. I am sure that he would like to tell everyone in person, or at least… confront those that have already seen him.”

“Be at ease, my friend. Not a single word will come out of my lips in regards to the Exarch. I will relay our conversation with the rest of the Scions in private. Do tell Chessamile if you are in need of her assistance in getting that bullet out of him, or if not. That knowledge is not just for our relief but for theirs. Some of the healers are already talking amongst themselves and I would not be surprised if they request access into the Tower to tend to their leader.”

The Warrior of Darkness couldn’t help but smile sadly. They truly did love him. How could they not? The Crystal Exarch gave them the home that they needed when the Sin Eaters came to be. The Tower was their refuge, the actual light that they needed. It was the beacon of hope that G’raha Tia had hoped the Tower could become. And become it did.

“I will tell her immediately. Please, rest for now. You have done admirably, and I… I am grateful to all of the Twelve that you are all alive. Talk can happen another day. Please, get comfortable and let the healers do their work.” A’viloh’s eyes softened. Here he was saying that talk should happen another day, getting deja vu. Just as he did with his friend, he let out his gratitude. One last bit should be enough, along with some endearment.

“And… Thank you, Alphy. For all that you have done and for all that I know you will do. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. Have pleasant dreams..” The Leveilleur twin did his best to stifle his gasp but it could still be heard via the linkpearl. The Warrior’s relationship with the twins was a strong one and he knew that they looked up to him immensely, which is why he would always praise the twins, not only because he truly meant it, but also from them deserving to hear it. They did more for him and the Scions than they let on and would only say half of their accomplishments; when he found that out, he made damn sure to take them under his wing. He treated them with the same respect that he gave the other “adults” but also coddled them every now and then. He hoped that his words hit the male twin’s heart just as much as if his sister had told them to him, his smile going soft.

“...A… A good night to you as well, my friend. Do not stay up too late and please… may you also rest. Twelve knows that you need it.” Came Alphinaud’s reply, voice cracking halfway before the connection was broken.

Quick footsteps were heard towards the direction of the Ocular, Lyna pushing the door open with her shoulder. A heavy looking box along with a large bag was obscuring her vision, but she set everything down as if it was only parchment paper. She was breathing heavily through her nose, that being the only indication of the box’s true weight and placed the bag in front of A’viloh. Using a heavy knife, she quickly opened the box and pointed to each item, fumbling with the ones that could not be seen immediately.

“We are in luck, Warrior. The chirurgeons had in hand everything that you listed. In that bag are the ingredients that you requested and here are the tools used for minor surgery. In that box are sterile bandages and rags, while that box contains antiseptics. The smaller bags contain the empty bottles and the like. The more… flammable contents are at the bottom, protected by minor magick. Is there anything else that you require?”

Caramel ears perked up at all of the different goodies that he was brought, his scholar self already formulating the different ways that he could use all of the materials. The Bunsen burner must be at the bottom… Oh, there was the pestle and mortar. It wasn’t until his tail accidentally bumped into the person sleeping next to him that he realized how much he was gawking at everything. Lyna did not interrupt his thoughts, gaze expectant from awaiting more orders. Shaking his head quickly, the Warrior rose and set to sheepishly taking out the contents of the box.

“This should be more than enough for the moment. Thank you, Lyna. I will keep you posted on all of the developments with him. So far, he has been sleeping as well as one could with the wounds that he has. I checked some of them, and the external ones seem to be minor. What he truly needs is rest.” Lyna once again kept her eyes on her sleeping guardian when A’viloh gave his report. Her eyes were clear, but still largely unreadable. After a breath, she nodded.

“I will come back a few bells after the sun rises. You know what line I am on should you need me, correct?”

“Yes, Captain.”

“Good. Before I forget.” Lyna stepped forward, bringing her right hand out and into A’viloh’s view. He blinked a few times when he saw the fist and lifted his head from the box. Slowly, he brought up his palm. A small weight landed on it and when he brought the item into view, he saw that it was a small crystal key. It was the same color as the Ocular’s walls and he made the connection instantly: it was the same key that G’raha had bestowed to Lyna before he left. Small as it was, it was still warm and held more than it showed.

Trust. She was fully trusting him with the contents of the Tower.

“Are you… are you sure in giving this to me…?” A’viloh asked quietly. He knew that he was stepping way over his boundaries. First he was keeping the Exarch away from his people. Next, he was being given the key to answering many of his questions. How much more would he be given…?

“Full sure, Warrior. This key… I believe that he wanted you to have it. I just happen to be the first to reach him,” came Lyna’s stern reply. 

“Remember, I will come late in the morning. Do not hesitate to call me should you need anything else.” And with that, she turned on her heel, quietly closing the door behind her.

Now alone in the room, A’viloh waited until he could no longer hear the Captain’s footsteps. Turning his head to look at the sleeping leader, he lifted his hand from his ankle and inspected his wounds once more. Several cuts were on his legs and arms, still dirty with blood and salt despite the long dip they had in the sea.

‘You can be yourself now.’ A’viloh paused, hand hovering over his pocket. Icy relief flooded into his veins, shuddering from the voice. They were getting stronger, something that he welcomed with open arms. However, their words made them slightly weary. Yes, they were alone, but--

‘She will not come back until morning. Be at ease.’

He trusted him. If Esteem told him it was alright, then it was. His tired shoulders relaxed, swiveling ears slowing down. Yes, yes, it will be alright.

“Let’s get you out of those clothes, shall we…” Standing a bit aways, he dipped his hand into his inner coat pocket and pulled out the soul stone belonging to that of the former Scholars, tucking his dark knight soul stone away. He thanked Fray for giving him strength in transporting the Exarch, as well as for the reassurance. With his magic now heightened, he laid his hands just ilms away from the sleeping Miqo’te, and let his aether do a more thorough inspection. Hands slowly moved to the Exarch’s backside and they stiffened when he felt the corrupted aether. It was undeniable that the bullet belonged to that of the Ascian, the foreign object feeling wrong. He brought his hands back down, sleeves lightly brushing against the Exarch’s red tattered tunic.

‘This bed is not enough. Surely… surely there must be other rooms in the Tower…’

He shoved his hand back into his coat pocket, picking out his summoner soul stone. He would not leave his friend alone, and he knew just the partner that would keep his friend company.

“Come on out, Lizette.” Writing out the necessary spell, his partner in crime appeared from a rainbow of colors. The red carbuncle shook her coat once, getting accustomed to the room around her before finally sitting obediently on her owner’s feet. A’viloh smiled brightly at the first friend that joined him on his long journey all of those years ago. Despite him using Esteem more often these days, it seemed that his other friend did not mind and was still willing to follow him to the ends of the earth. Bending down, he lovingly scratched her ears and then under her chin. She chirruped in glee, tail curling up around her feet.

“Lizette, I need to find a more suitable room for him. Stay at his side and keep him warm, will you? If anything happens, you come straight to me.” He scratched behind her ears again, her chirruping once more in understanding. “Come around his feet, he has a nasty wound on his back.” He picked up his furry friend and placed her close to them as she did as she was told. The Warrior nodded at her and swiftly left the room, making sure to keep the door wide open for Lizette to get out should anything happen. He hoped that nothing would.

Running across the Ocular, he inserted the key into the other door as gently as he could, hearing a faint click. As he pressed against the wooden door, he was quickly met with an immovable wall. He shoved a few more times, finding nothing to pull. Bracing himself against the door, he attempted to transfer some of his aether into the golden opening--nothing. Was he only allowed into that tiny room…?

“You… you said that you wouldn’t deny my request… So… so why…? Why won’t you let me in…?” The Tower was connected to him. He said back on the shores of Kholusia that he would let A’viloh treat him. Why was he being denied? Were those words just for that moment…? A’viloh could no longer see the door in front of him, vision clouded by tears. He wanted to help his friend and give him just as much as what he was given here in the First. He deserved that and more. He needed that and more. Trembling hands fisted against the door and A’viloh put some of his weight on the contraption, forehead thumping lightly on the crystal.

“G’raha Tia… I beseech you… Let me in… That room… It’s too small. Let me find something more suitable for your recovery. I swear to only touch that what is needed and nothing more. Please. Please, please, please… Just let me in--” By some grace of the Twelve did the doors finally open. Or maybe it was because of much A’viloh pleaded. Whatever the case, A’viloh caught himself before he cut open his chin and ran straight inside, only coming back to pull out the key if he needed it.

A room similar to the Ocular laid on the other side, but much larger and with more doors. With pinned back ears, A’viloh looked around, seeing how much larger everything was. The crystal walls were dimmer but did naught to make the room feel smaller. Natural light, or so he thought it could be deemed that, filtered in from a small opening on the ceiling. On his right, a grand pillar tried to hide the humongous golden elevator that led who knows where. On his left, four identical doors called to him. And in front of him was an incredible staircase, the top obscured by shadows. He decided to go clockwise with his investigation, the first door leading into what could only be described as some type of lounging area. The area was mostly barren with the exception of a couch, a few potted plants, and a table with two chairs. The second door led to a bathroom. His eyes flew open at the ginormous pool that took up a third of the room. Closest to the door was a wash basin, toilet, and shower head that any normal person could use. There was barely any personality in that room as well.

The third door took him to what he needed. A room befitting a historian laid inside, a still too large bed some ways in front of him that seemed largely untouched, but the room was filled to the brim with life. Books were stacked as far as a Miqo’te could still reach the top, all various sizes and colors. On the right of the large desk closest to the door were more books, some opened while others carefully stacked. All types of parchment were on the left, some having fallen and laying unceremoniously on the floor. Even the small chair was stacked with books. A’viloh only took note of what was closest to him and sprinted to the last room. He had left his two friends alone for too much time, and counted his blessings at Lizette not scampering in. He only had to peek in to see that it was the kitchen area and promptly closed it, full on running back to the red-haired Miqo’te.

He sighed deeply in relief that finding Lizette right where he left her. Judging from her relaxed position, G’raha’s condition did not change for the worse, but it was not for the better either. With a flick of his wrist, Lizette’s form changed to that of the Titan-egi, the two of them working together to place the Exarch on A’viloh’s back. They took their time with the process, quick pants being their only indication of the Exarch’s pain. He still didn’t wake, no matter how much they jostled him. A’viloh didn’t want to imagine the leader’s pained cries or tears either; he had seen enough of pain for one day. Ordering Titan to stack the bag of ingredients on the large box, it took even longer for A’viloh and Titan to get back to the bedroom A’viloh found from how difficult it was to control Titan’s movements and his own. They had to be gentle with everything they carried, the summoner needing to look down at his feet and state out loud which foot to place over the other. By the time they arrived, the Warrior of Darkness was exhausted mentally.

Placing the Exarch on his side, the Warrior began the painstaking task in removing the ornaments on the tunic along with the clothing itself. He refused to leave his friend with any remnants of the battle that they just won; a Miqo’te’s nose was more potent than a normal nose and he couldn’t count the number of times he wished that someone would remove his battered armor from him when being healed. He didn’t need that reminder of the battles that he could have lost or how much he went through to win them. He always held his tongue, knowing that he should be grateful in receiving any healing at all, but that didn’t mean that anyone else should have to suffer through his same fate.

He found a pair of clean cotton trousers in his bag and slipped them on the Exarch. Changing once more to his scholar form, he summoned Eos for the extra light and helping hand that he knew that he needed. But even then, that wasn’t enough. Looking around the room, he found lamps but no light source to them.

‘He must be able to control the light in here, and only him.’ Rubbing a finger under his chin in thought, he pondered at what else he could use as a light source.

‘Parchment paper is out of the question, I’ll just create an uncontrollable fire… The Bunsen burner would be too dangerous…’

Eos saw how deep in thought her master was in and bobbed around the room here and there to get accustomed to the space, just like how Lizette did. A’viloh’s tired eyes followed his fairy, more furniture coming into view but he did not keep tabs on all that was illuminated.

‘Illuminated…’

Snapping his fingers, Eos quickly came back to him from thinking that he needed her. Muttering an apology, A’viloh placed a hand on his chest as he began to conjure up the image of a warm friend. One that would always create a fiery glow on his tomes when he needed it, and its counterpart cast a gentle hue to help him sleep at night when the day’s events were too distracting in his mind. Within seconds, his Wind-up-Sun appeared, nearly blinding him until he moved it farther up. If he could not turn on a light, then he would just have to create it.

In a matter of minutes, he washed his hands as thoroughly as he could, changed into the cleanest clothes that he could find, and set about extracting the bullet from G’raha’s back. It was at this time that he really inspected his friend’s back, more so how far the crystallization spread to his body. As he thought, his right side was mostly covered, such as his hand, arm, shoulder, and part of his neck. The crystal took over the entire top portion of his back, that being what saved him, and then decided to slow down it’s path on his left side. His left shoulder was starting to get enveloped, judging from how thin the crystal appeared, and stopped on the left side of his neck. Nape and Adam’s apple remain largely untouched, surprising A’viloh with the relief he felt from that. Going back down, the crystal took over his right hip entirely but no more than that. His entire front, at least what he could see in the darkness, remained that of flesh and blood.

He made a point to only pay attention to what was needed. His friend’s body was not a specimen. He was a man that still had a heart beat, still had a conscience, and was his own person. If G’raha wished to show him what he had become, he would accept the decision with open arms. If he did not, A’viloh would accept that too. All that he was, all that he became… it was for him. It was for the Warrior of Darkness that he tried so desperately to bring to the First. It was for that hero that was written in those books and talked about while the Eighth Umbral Calamity was happening around them. It was all for that person. And he would be that person for G’raha. It is the least that he deserved after all of the sacrifices that he made.

Shaking his head, A’viloh knew that precious time was ticking as he let those frivolous thoughts overtake his mind. He knew that it was also from the nerves overtaking him. The large wound on G’raha’s back was horrendous,, cracked crystal surrounding the wound as different hues of red seemed to pulsate underneath. It was G’raha’s aether trying to mend itself and A’viloh imagined that it was the will of the Tower making it so too. Taking a deep breath, he began to make the anesthetic potion to hopefully numb whatever flesh was under the crystal, formulating a plan in his mind on how to extract that bullet.

[ianspirations]

Querida Amazonia - A Summary

Pope Francis summarizes the discussions of the synod into 4 dreams which I think are a brilliant way of portraying the situation as well as the vision for the Amazonian region in particular and for the world in general. He says clearly that he has wilfully refrained from quoting the final document of the Synod because he desires that “everyone read it in full” (QA 3).

“The Amazon region” in the words of the Pope, “is a multinational and interconnected whole, a great biome shared by nine countries: Brazil, Bolivia, Colombia, Ecuador, Guyana, Peru, Surinam, Venezuela and the territory of French Guiana” (QA 5). Although this is a directed exhortation, the Pope chooses to open it up for the whole world since “the Church’s concern for the problems of this area obliges us to discuss, however briefly, a number of other important issues that can assist other areas of our world in confronting their own challenges” (QA 5).

Here I wish to quote the first part of paragraph 6 because it is so powerful in its message, rich in meaning and clear in its instruction. The Pope writes, “Everything that the Church has to offer must become incarnate in a distinctive way in each part of the world, so that the Bride of Christ can take on a variety of faces that better manifest the inexhaustible riches of God’s grace. Preaching must become incarnate, spirituality must become incarnate, ecclesial structures must become incarnate” (QA 6)

The Four Dreams

I.                    A Social Dream: I dream of an Amazon region that fights for the rights of the poor, the original peoples and the least of our brothers and sisters, where their voices can be heard and their dignity advanced. (QA 7)

The aim of this dream is to bring about a situation wherein every person can enjoy ‘good living.’ This consists in making arduous efforts on behalf of the poor. The Amazon is facing an ‘ecological disaster’ but it is not enough to tackle the ecological issue leaving aside the extremely versatile social situation. The Pope quoting Laudato Si (LS) #49 says, “a true ecological approach always becomes a social approach; it must integrate questions of justice in debates on the environment, so as to hear both the cry of the earth and the cry of the poor.”

The Amazonian region holds massive interest for colonizers; these are not seeking to conquer the place as the colonizers of old but desire to control the land in a new way chiefly through timber and mining industries. This wanton greed has expelled and marginalized the indigenous peoples, the river people and those of African descent who inhabited these parts. What resulted from this fiasco was enslavement, subjection, poverty, xenophobia, sexual exploitation and human trafficking (QA 10).

All those national and international business that have contributed to turning the Amazon into a living hell for the people are guilty of “injustice and crime” (QA 14). The Pope humbly exhorts, “we cannot allow globalization to become ‘a new version of colonialism’” (QA 14).

“We need to feel outrage, as Moses did (cf. Ex 11:8), as Jesus did (cf. Mk 3:5), as God does in the face of injustice (cf. Am 2:4-8; 5:7-12; Ps 106:40)” (QA 15). Colonialism has not ended; it has merely been changed, disguised and concealed (QA 16). In order to combat this grave evil we have to “overcome the colonizing mentalities and build networks of solidarity and development” (QA 17). The Pope suggests that alternatives be sought for sustainable herding and agriculture, discovering sources of energy that don’t pollute and adopting “dignified means of employment that do not entail the destruction of the natural environment and of cultures” (QA 17).

The Church has and continues to play a vital role in defending the rights of the indigenous peoples (QA 18-19). However, the members of the Church like many others, sadly “have been a part of networks of corruption, at times to the point of agreeing to keep silent in exchange for economic assistance for ecclesial works” (QA 25).

The Pope dreams that “the Amazon region…be a place of social dialogue, especially between the various original peoples, for the sake of developing forms of fellowship and joint struggle” (QA 26). “Dialogue must not only favour the preferential option on behalf of the poor, the marginalized and the excluded, but also respect them as having a leading role to play” (QA 27). The Pope insists that all ‘others,’ that is, those without a direct interest in the issue, ought to be treated as ‘others’ and the opinions and ideas also treated as such so as to avoid the possibility of any concrete decision or plan being ‘a plan drawn up by the few for the few.’

II.                  A Cultural Dream: I dream of an Amazon region that can preserve its distinctive cultural riches, where the beauty of our humanity shines forth in so many varied ways. (QA 7)

The fundamental way in which the Amazon can maintain and enhance its rich cultural heritage is through education. The very purpose of education is “to cultivate without uprooting, to foster growth without weakening identity, to be supportive without being invasive” (QA 28). Since the Amazon region is host to many peoples and nationalities, besides over 110 different kinds of indigenous peoples, the treasure trove that is their culture is at a serious risk. First and foremost, they face the threat of ‘postmodern colonization’ and secondly, the classification as ‘uncivilized savages’ who ought to be ‘civilized’ by means of Western education (QA 29).

In the pre-colonial period, the majority of people lived on the shores of the rivers and lakes. Colonizers claimed these prime lands and drove the indigenous peoples inwards to the forests. Today, the desertification of inlands has forced many people to the ‘outskirts and sidewalks of the cities.’ “There they usually lack the points of reference and the cultural roots that provided them with an identity and a sense of dignity, and they swell the ranks of the outcast. This disrupts the cultural transmission of a wisdom that had been passed down for centuries from generation to generation” (QA 30).

Every human group has its distinctive lifestyle and worldview. “Fishers are not the same as hunters, and the gatherers of the interior are not the same as those who cultivate the flood lands… In each land and its features, God manifests himself and reflects something of his inexhaustible beauty. Each distinct group, then, in a vital synthesis with its surroundings, develops its own form of wisdom.” (QA 32). The ‘consumerist vision of human beings’ steamrolls over all cultural distinctions and unique characteristics thereby blurring out and “diminishing the immense variety which is the heritage of all humanity” (QA 33 quoting Laudato Si 144). This has a particularly devastating effect on young people because it causes them to lose touch with their cultural heritage and roots. In order to prevent this problem, the Pope points out the “need to care lovingly for our roots, since they are ‘a fixed point from which we can grow and meet new challenges’” (QA 33). For all Christians, in addition to their cultural roots, there is a need to additionally take charge of one’s faith roots which includes “the history of the people of Israel and the Church up to our own day. Knowledge of them can bring joy and, above all, a hope capable of inspiring noble and courageous actions” (QA 33).

The Pope appreciates all those who have stemmed the threat of losing out on cultural heritage by “writing down their stories and describing the meaning of their customs. In this way, they themselves can explicity acknowledge that they possess something more than an ethnic identity and that they are bearers of precious personal, family and collective memories” (QA 35).

Every culture has its own set of drawbacks. Western cultures dark side of consumerism, individualism, discrimination, inequality and many others are easily noticed by all. Similarly, Amazonian cultures also have their dark side. The Pope suggests that all of us bring our cultures to “the common table, a place of conversation and of shared hopes. In this way our differences, which could seem like a banner or a wall, can become a bridge. Identity and dialogue are not enemies. Our own cultural identity is strengthened and enriched as a result of dialogue with those unlike ourselves” (QA 37). If a culture closes up on itself it becomes “inward-looking and tries to perpetuate obsolete ways of living by rejecting any exchange or debate with regard to the truth about man” (QA 37). The responsibility of protecting, encouraging and nurturing cultures like with each of us. If we are not open to the idea of diverse cultures, how do we expect the people of the interiors to be?

The Pope points out how the globalized economy surreptitiously destroys our human, social and cultural riches. The invasive nature of mass communication drastically reduces the scope for cultural expression and alienates people from their native cultural contexts by introducing them into a digital culture that cares little for authentic cultural expression. For this reason it is absolute vital that cultures and their people be respected, and that they find a definition of ‘good life’ for themselves within the ‘world of symbols and customs’ proper to them rather than following an external definition with accompanying regulations for implantation and ideas for enhancement (QA 40).

III.                Ecological Dream: I dream of an Amazon region that can jealously preserve its overwhelming natural beauty and the superabundant life teeming in its rivers and forests. (QA 7)

The Amazonian culture is so closely and intimately connected with nature that “daily existence is always cosmic” (QA 41). While liberating people from various forms of bondage that entrap them is a way of caring for the environment and defending it, what is of greater importance is “helping the human heart to be open with trust to the God who not only has created all that exists, but has also given us himself in Jesus Christ. The Lord, who is the first to care for us, teaches us to care for our brothers and sisters and the environment which he daily gives us. This is the first ecology that we need” (QA 41). An ecology of nature has to coexist with a human and/or social ecology. The two are interdependent on nearly every level. This belief stems from the conviction that ‘everything is connected.’ (QA 41)

Care for people and care for the ecosystem cannot be separated. An abuse of nature amounts to an ‘abuse of our ancestors, of our brothers and sisters, of the creation and the Creator.’ The harm we do is not limited to the here and now but puts the future in serious jeopardy. Quoting from the Instrumentum Laboris of the Synod, “the land has blood, and it is bleeding; the multinationals have cut the veins of our mother Earth” (QA 42).

The Amazon is a land of water. “The rivers and streams are like veins and water determines every form of life” (QA 43). Water does not divide people by giving them liquid boundaries but rather unites them (QA 45).

The equilibrium of the planet depends in a big way on the health of the Amazon. A huge number of living beings and various climatic elements rely on the Amazon for their existence. The Amazon is a natural filter of Carbon Dioxide, it’s rich forest cover is not only home to numerous species but also contains “resources that could prove essential for curing diseases” (QA 48); the various products like fish and fruits enable humanity to sustain themselves.

When one considers environmental damage or destruction one usually evaluates it in terms of visible extinction but this is not the  correct way of doing this. “The good functioning of ecosystems also requires fungi, algae, worms, insects, reptiles and an innumerable variety of microorganisms” (LS 34). Unfortunately, their impact as well as the damage they incur in the name of ‘development’ is often and sadly, overlooked.

The Pope appreciates the commitment of international agencies and local bureaucracies who “draw public attention to these issues and offer critical cooperation, employing legitimate means of pressure, to ensure that eac government carries out its proper and inalienable responsibility to preserve its country’s environment and natural resources, without capitulating to spurious local and international interests” (LS 38).

The economically invested parties are never satisfied with the profits they make and are constantly on the search for new and innovative means to increase their balances. The Pope suggests that the whole world come together and ensure that there are some sort of clear boundaries that are put in place to protect ecosystems and that do not allow the wanton destruction of our common home in the name of development or profit. (QA 52) Thousands of species have already had the existence cut short due to a variety of reasons but mostly due to human interference. The Pope says it beautifully, “Because of us, thousands of species will no longer give glory to God by their very existence, nor convey their message to us. We have no such right” (QA 54) The Pope concludes that the Amazon region is a “theological locus, a space where God himself reveals himself and summons his sons and daughters” (QA 57).

In order to improve the situation and prevent further destruction, education has a massive role. “A sound and sustainable ecology, one capable of bringing about change, will not develop unless people are changed, unless they are encouraged to opt for another style of life, one less greedy and more serene, more respectful and less anxious, more fraternal” (QA 58).

IV.                An Ecclesial Dream: I dream of Christian communities capable of generous commitment, incarnate in the Amazon region, and giving the Church new faces with Amazonian features. (QA 7)

The Pope is very clear in his stating that all Christian interventions ought to be focused and centred on Christ. All that we do must in some way or another be an opportunity to incarnate the Gospel (QA 64-65). He is very strong in emphasizing that even our work of social upliftment and liberation ought to involve inviting the poor and abandoned to a friendship with the Lord (QA 63).

In order to preach the Gospel effectively, the Church must take on the identity and reality of the people to whom she desires to reach out. The Church brings to the dialogue of inculturation her own rich heritage of Christian wisdom and experience that has been handed down through the centuries (QA 66). Pope Saint John Paul II put it very beautifully when he addressed the Indigenous peoples of the American Continent (12 October 1992), “a faith that does not become culture is a faith not fully accepted, not fully reflected upon, not fully lived” (as quoted in QA 67). Thus the Church must undertake the double action of giving the Gospel and incarnating it in the culture while at the same time receiving from that culture ‘new aspects of revelation’ (QA 68).

For the Church to achieve a better inculturation in the Amazon, she must “listen to its ancestral wisdom, listen once more to the voice of its elders, recognize the values present in the way of life of the original communities, and recover the rich stories of its peoples” (QA 70). For the indigenous people the ‘good life’ is expressed in “personal, familial, communal and cosmic harmony…in a communitarian approach to existence, the ability to find joy and fulfilment in an austere and simple life, and a responsible care of nature that preserves resources for future generations” (QA 71). The Pope wants the Church assist the people in the process of ‘cultural retrieval,’ educate them, especially the urban population, against the dangers of consumerism and isolation and help urban communities to be missionary not only to those among them but to all the poor, marginalized and migrants (QA 72). For the Pope, these are all forms of inculturation and they elevate and fulfil ((QA 72-73).

Indigenous mysticism stresses “the interconnection and interdependence of the whole of creation;” it is a “mysticism of gratuitousness that loves life as a gift;” it is ultimately a “mysticism of a sacred wonder before nature and all its forms of life” (QA 73). For us Christians, it is Jesus Christ, the Son of God who connects all things and is present in and through them (QA 74).

Poverty is one of the defining features of the Amazon region. The Gospel shows a clear connection between evangelization and human advancement. Hence, all Christian communities ought to work for the justice of God’s kingdom that can be achieved through work for the advancement of those who are on the peripheries. The Church’s pastors have to be trained in this regard (QA 75). “In this way, we will reveal the true beauty of the Gospel, which fully humanizes, integrally dignifies persons and peoples, and brings fulfilment to every heart and the whole of life” (QA 76).

When this occurs we can look forward to “witnesses of holiness with an Amazonian face, not imitations of models imported from other places” (QA 77). The holiness of the Amazon will be “born of encounter and engagement, contemplation and service, receptive solitude and life in community, cheerful sobriety and the struggle for justice” (QA 77). This process has been initiated many years ago and the people can be considered to be ‘initially evangelized’ (QA 78).

The Pope opines that there is a possibility of adopting an indigenous symbol without it being considered idolatry. Local myths need not be discarded but possess the ability of appealing to people’s minds and becoming carriers of Christian truth. “A missionary of souls will try to discover the legitimate needs and concerns that seek an outlet in at times imperfect, partial or mistaken religious expressions, and will attempt to respond to them with an inculturated spirituality” (QA 79).

The process of inculturation can be initiated in a very powerful way through the sacraments, “since they unite the divine and the cosmic, grace and creation” (QA 81). The sacraments are unique in as much as they take up creation to God in the same instance as they bring out the Divine manifested in creation. The Sacraments communicate the mercy and healing of God and consequently ought never to be held from anyone who desires to receive them (QA 84). The Church needs to find ways and means of making the sacraments, especially the Holy Eucharist frequent and easily accessible even in the remotest and most isolated communities (QA 86). The role and concept of the priest requires to be revised in keeping with the situation of the place. The Pope defines a priest not as one who possesses power either of the material or spiritual kind but as one who is tasked with incarnating Christ in and through the celebration of the Eucharist and absolving people of their sins (QA 87-88).

The Pope envisions that Christian communities be full of life. This fullness of life can come about only if the community is first united. The Eucharist is a sacrament that “signifies and realizes the Church’s unity” (QA 91). Priests must foster communion in their Churches and not simply aim at achieving unity. Communion can be achieved when the diversity and variety of gifts and charisms that the Spirit pours out on the faithful is properly channelized and expressed. Priests alone, though they have a vital role, are not the only ones responsible and capable of this enormous task; permanent deacons, religious women and lay persons have their unique contributions to make. The Church has to develop an “ecclesial culture that is distinctly lay” (QA 94).

The Pope concludes this dream by mentioning the unforgettable and irreplaceable contribution made by women in the Amazon region. For decades the faith has been kept alive even without a priest thanks to women who “undoubtedly called and prompted by the Holy Spirit, baptized, catechized, prayed and acted as missionaries” (QA 99). The Pope warns the faithful against a reductionist mentality which believes that women can truly be granted a greater status and participation in the Church only if they are ordained priests. He warns that such thinking will serve no other purpose except to “clericalize women, diminish the great value of what they have already accomplished, and subtly make their indispensable contribution less effective” (QA 100). God in His infinite wisdom sought to reveal His power and love through two human faces: “the face of his divine Son made man and the face of a creature, a woman, Mary. Women make their contribution to the Church in a way that is properly theirs, by making present the tender strength of Mary, the Mother” (QA 101). Leaving aside the functional aspect of both genders, the Pope stresses the indispensability of women by stating that without them and their contribution “the Church breaks down” (QA 101). The history of many Amazonian communities is testament to this fact.  

[thedarklightwithinus]

Winds of Grey.

A/N; I’ve tried writing this a little different to how I usually write... I do hope you like it! More instalments to come!

Summary; Two make it out. Make it out of what though?

Characters; You (Baratheon Reader), Grey Wind, Jon Snow, Robb Stark. 

Words; 1.6K

Requested; Yes! By; @witch-of-letters

Now

Times had changed drastically. No longer was she able to live as though she did so without a care in the world. No longer did she live, never looking over her shoulder or jumping at the slightest noise that filled her ears.

“Perhaps we’ve taken a wrong turning.” Y/N softly spoke, sighing as she took a look around her and tried to force herself to recognise anything around her. “Or perhaps we were never going in the correct direction...” 

She breathed deeply, pushing a few strands of hair from her face and tucking it behind her ear, looking towards the sky. Her companion merely looked around for a threat of any kind.

“No.” She muttered, twisting as she finally turned to face what she knew was the general direction. “North is North. We go North until we cannot go North anymore.”

Her companion looked up at her, his head tilting slightly as though asking if she was serious or not. Y/N raised a brow.

“Do not look at me like that, Grey Wind.” She scolded the Direwolf, setting off in the direction she had deemed worthy. “Father always taught me to think quickly and not to ponder on the idea too much. After all... Ours is the fury.”

With that said, Y/N set off once more, her companion and saviour, Grey Wind at her side.   Then "My Father says that it is impossible for any to journey North beyond the wall." Y/N told the two boys, looking up at them as the three stopped running and found themselves in the Godswood's. "Of course he just says that to make himself seem as though he knows everything."

"Your father is right." Robb Stark told the young girl, shrugging as he looked over at Jon who was busy trying to keep his eyes from falling on Y/N's form. "No one journey's beyond the wall-"

"Yes they do." Jon interrupted, a small frown falling upon his face. "Father has told us story's of men who have gone beyond the wall.”Y/N instantly brightened as she turned to look up at Jon, her eyes sparkling fiercely as she reached out to grip his hand. "Tell me of these story's, Jon!" She beamed, not noticing the way the older boys face softened significantly. "I can tell when my Father lies... He just tries to protect me I suppose."

Jon took a moment to take in just how excited Y/N was before he smiled slightly. "Alright... Father told me of a ranger of the night's watch... Redwyn was his name. He left Shadow Tower to journey through the unknown during the reign of my ancestor, Dorren Stark... He was king In the North during that time."

Y/N continued to listen intently to what Jon was telling her, never once looking as though she had grew bored of his words. Jon found himself opening up quickly to the girl who was his best friend. Of course, he had to share that title with Robb. However, he couldn't bring himself to be mad over the fact when she looked at him as though he had all the answers to anything she wanted to know.

"We should head back inside. Mother will be wondering where we've got too." Robb announced, smiling slightly as he watched the pair talk, both pairs of eyes sparkling something crazy. "The last thing we want is for mother to decide we're not allowed to roam the keep."  Now Y/N breathed deeply, trying to force herself to grow used to the cold that had been ingulfing her the further North she walked. She couldn't be sure how many days had passed since she had been forced to start her journey with Grey Wind, but knew that if she stopped to think about it, she'd end up crying once more.

The leaves crunched beneath her feet as she moved through the tree's, her bow in her hand by her side in case it was needed. Grey Wind walked along beside her, his eyes darting in random directions that he heard any sort of noise coming from before he reluctantly turned to face forward once more once it was proven to be no threat.

Coming to a slow stop, Y/N tilted her head as she looked off towards the right, trying to look through the tree's. "Grey Wind." She whistled, patting her leg as she took off in the direction, her nerves on high alert as she moved.

Grey Wind was quick to change directions, padding off in front of her to insure he would be the first to encounter any danger, should there be any. As the pair broke through the treeline, Y/N came to a sudden stop. She gaped slightly at the road before her, eyeing the archway that was feet ahead. "Kingsroad…" Y/N muttered, a smile begging to form on her face as she looked down at her companion who was already looking at her. "Come on."

All to happily, Grey Wind took off beside Y/N as the pair began to walk on the road. Though she was happy that she had managed to find a guaranteed way of taking her to exactly where she wanted to go, Y?N still stuck close to the woods lining the road incase the two of them encountered something or someone.

"You know, I still remember the first time I journeyed along this road with my Father." Y/N began, smiling softly at the thought of Robert Baratheon. "It was the first time I met Jon and Robb... Well, that I could remember." Grey Wind seemed to sadden slightly at the mention of Robb Stark. The wounds the two suffered mentally still fresh. "Father would tell me that the Kingsroad runs from Storm's End, all the way up to the Wall... I-I... I do not know if Jon would want to see me... He... He's all I have left. Of course, you too." She added upon the look the Direwolf sent her.  Then 

”Why are you not enjoying the feast?” Y/N asked, her voice barely above a whisper as Jon Snow jumped slightly, turning to look over his shoulder at her. 

Jon was shooting arrow after arrow in the courtyard of Winterfell while all its residents was inside, enjoying the feast that had been set up due to the kings arrival. 

Y/N raised a brow as she stood her ground, her arms behind her back. Jon stares at her for a moment, the features on his face loosing its harshness the longer he stared at Robert Baratheon’s daughter. 

“Ca- Lady Stark has forbid me from going the feast.” He finally admitted, twisting the bow in his hands slightly. “It would be improper for a bastard to dine with the King.” 

Y/N said nothing as she continued to stare at Jon. Though there was a thousand and one things she wanted to say, she knew Jon better than most and knew that nothing would persuade him of his worth. 

It was then that she pledged to herself that she would show him. One way or another she would show Jon Snow just how much he was worth. 

“Will you teach me?” She asked, nodding once towards the bow in his grasp. “What is it you Starks like to say? Winter is coming? Don’t you think I should be prepared for when that time comes?” She asked, holding back the smile when she noticed how his eyes had sparkles slightly upon being refuted to as a Stark. 

“Of course, my Lady.” Jon smiled softly, motioning for her to move towards him as he held the bow out for her. “Hold this part in your dominant hand.” He muttered, his mouth close to her ear as she did as she was told, gripping the bow in her right hand. “Not to tight.” He whispered, reached around her to gently pull her fingers from the wood. 

Now 

Y/N stood still for a moment, trying to gain the energy she needed to continue on her journey to The Wall with Grey Wind. She eyed the turning that she was about to pass, smiling sadly as Grey Wind perked up and ran circles around her in excitement. 

“Sorry boy... We’re not going that way this time.” She found herself telling him, watching as he came to a stop, almost understanding the meaning of her words. “Winterfell is no longer a safe place for us. It’s alright. You’ll see Jon soon I hope... Surely you remember him?”

Grey Wind perked up slightly, more asking beside Y/N and eyeing her face as she grinned through the wave of tiredness that filled her bones. 

“Jon Snow.” She muttered, blissfully. “You know I love him. I do. I have not told him of this fact. The longer I think on it, the longer I realise that it has always been him.” Grey Wind let out a sound that seemed to come from deep within him as Y/N looked down at him. “You may even see your brother... Don’t tell me you have forgotten Ghost?” If anything, Grey Wind seemed to perk up considerably upon hearing the name of one of his own. 

Y/N grinned brightly, smoothing a hand over Grey Winds neck before the pair of them set off once more.

It was once difficult to describe the relationship Y/N and the Direwolf had. However, as time passed and the pair spent more and more time around each-other, a bond that was simply unbreakable began to form rather quickly. 

“It’s you and me now, Boy.” Y/N muttered, running her hand along Grey-Winds back as he walked beside her.