#I have no idea what their ship name is so I won’t tag it. No point anyways for several reasons

[bobbydabob]

hello. i love your art greatly. so much. huge inspiration. the shapes. everything about it. i hope you have a great day.

also. i saw your requests are open. feel free to ignore this but. how about some rikai and fumiya interactions. i think theyre so funny ..

either way. Have a beautiful day your art is so awesome thank you for sharing. i found your blog because of charisma house and i love just seeing whatever you draw of anything..

Sure thang, they are my favorite duo too. Sorry this took like 1 million years I didn’t feel like drawing cartoons and also I got a big post and it made me nervous.

[sanjisprincesswifey]

valentine's day

summary: spending valentine's day with the monster trio

notes: sanji, zoro, & luffy x implied female reader (separately), pure fluff

black leg sanji

sanji may know your favorite flower or candy, but he remains a teddy bear, roses, and box of chocolates kind of guy 

for sanji, it’s the idea that you deserve love in its purest form; that all he wants to give you is the love people see in movies or read in books

it’s about the sentiment; he could give you your favorite flowers or candy any other day (and he does). today, on valentine’s day, it’s about him and how he wants to show you he loves you 

he’ll plan a nice, romantic dinner that includes a sweet wine, dimly lit candles, and a meal perfectly curated for your palettes

again, to sanji it’s his way of proving to you that he loves you; he’s so in love with you, in fact, that you’re worthy of the love that others only dream of having. so tonight’s meal has been in preparation for weeks before the actual date 

he can’t help but stray from the basics and put his own touches on everything. 

sanji gets all giggly and flustered while he leaves small presents around the ship for you to find. small is a loose term though, in actuality the presents probably cost thousands of berry 

finally, he pulls a couple all nighters to write you a handwritten love letter. it obviously starts off as a proclamation of his love and obsession with you, but around the second page he begins to explain just how much you mean to him. how he’s changed for the better and learned to love both himself and life so much more now that he has you. 

the day consists of being wrapped up in your boyfriends long limbs practically every minute of the day, so many kisses you swear his lips must be tired, and words even sweeter than the candy he gives you

roronoa zoro

zoro gets lost walking on a straight path, you think he’ll remember a holiday? 

i don’t know if he even knows what day it is normally 

since he doesn’t even know what day it is, that most likely means he doesn’t even have a gift for you

sorry babe, but if you want to have a nice date you will have to plan it yourself 

however, if you mention your concerns to someone who is more situationally aware (cough, cough, nami, robin, or sanji), he may remember to get you a gift 

albeit, it won’t be wrapped and will most likely still be wearing the price tag, but it is a gift regardless

that being said, roronoa zoro is incredibly sentimental in his gift giving. just because he may be a bit forgetful does not mean that he doesn’t love you

he loves you so much he doesn’t need a day to remind you of that; he tells you every day in the way that he interacts with you 

considering how much he loves you, remember to give him some reassurance about his airhead-ness. he doesn’t want to admit it, but he was actually a little worried it might jeopardize your relationship 

monkey d luffy

knows valentine’s day is important to you so he’ll celebrate with you, but otherwise doesn’t really care much for the holiday besides all the candy, of course

luffy can’t be trusted with any money nami gives him as he’d spend it solely on meat, so he must resort to handmade gifts

but do not be fooled by the name! your captain is incredibly sweet, the handpicked flower bouquets contain all your favorite colors and all your favorite flowers. he insists on adventuring to a flower field and picking each flower individually claiming that it’ll only be right for you if he’s the one who does it

usopp, robin and nami then wrap it up all nice and pretty for that extra special touch

in classic luffy fashion, he’d also give you a box that has the appearance of a box of chocolates but inside contains a bunch of cool looking seashells or rocks that he, again, hand chose for you

no outside planning is done besides this though as dinner with luffy only sounds fun in theory; he’s a human vacuum cleaner, you wouldn’t get very far in your own meal before he’s swallowing up your food too 

he’d love for you to join him for a dance under the moonlight though

his long, rubber arms wrap around you while his body sinks into yours as you rock back and forth to the music 

and, of course, he is telling you he loves you every second of the day and every other day for the rest of your lives

ʕ•́ᴥ•̀ʔっ like this post? send me a request!

[goingsunnythousandmerry]

Sanji- A Moment Alone @ the Whole Cake Chateau

Now I’ll be honest, I haven’t read much Sanji as he’s not one of my mains. However, Whole Cake inspired me to give writing him a go. Thoughts are welcome.

Warnings: 18+ Minors DNI, NSFW, Spoilers for Zou/Whole Cake, vaginal sex, blowjob, deep throating, pet names, fingering, oral female/male, female riding, breeding, one night stand, I don’t own these characters. A bit fluffy at times.

Summary: Sanji leaves the crew to go to Whole Cake Island, due to a scheme cooked up by Big Mom and his dad. You realize when he’s gone, you may have feelings for him and decide to go after him with the help of Luffy and your crewmates. Once you find Sanji, well, he can’t leave, but you get one night together…

Sanji-Whole Cake

You’d never thought much about Sanji and his advances before, that was until he was gone. When he left Zou suddenly, and to get married of all things, something clicked inside you. Sanji was your friend, but maybe you felt more for him than just friendship?

You’d been with the Strawhats for a while now. Decent fighter, devil fruit ability, and always willing to help with the cooking and cleaning on the ship. Your upbringing was rocky and you thought there was no beauty left in the world. That was until the Strawhats saved you and told you about their adventures. That’s when you realized your dream, to find the beauty in the world from end to end and document it.

Sanji and you were close. You realized preparing food for a crew with a big eater like Luffy, was no easy feet, so you started offering your assistance early on. Though, he rarely took it, as he would rather a pretty lady like you, sit and relax, so he could serve you. However, after much insisting and some teasing that resulted in nose bleeds threatening to ruin his food, he eventually came around.

When he left you were speechless. You just thought he was off in the kitchen again, insisting on no one helping him. Then, a day went by and there was no swooning at your feet or the smell of his cigarettes on the breeze. You missed the way he’d put his arms around you to help teach you to chop things properly. You missed how he’d drop everything to help you or any female if they were in any sort of trouble. You missed how he puffed on his cigarettes in the heat of battle. You missed his advice and his fights with Zoro. Most of all, you missed staying up late and looking at the stars with him. On those nights, you’d discuss what you thought would be at the end of the line, the end of the new world, laughtale. You’d talk about your pasts and your hopes for the future. You never thought your future would be without Sanji. You didn’t know in what capacity, but you knew he’d always be there.

He said he’d be back, he smiled when he said it, but something didn’t feel right. Something in your heart ached. Something funny or sad would happen and he was the first person you’d want to tell, but he was gone. How’d you let him go?

You sat alone outside staring up through the forest at the stars. Nami came out and found you. She sat next to you before you realized she was there. You glanced at her and gave her a half smile.

“Y/N, what’s wrong? You haven’t been yourself since Sanji left.” Nami asked.

You glance at her then look back at the stars and sigh. You stare forward blankly a moment and before you can speak she opens her mouth again.

“We all miss him, Y/N, but he will be back. Luffy won’t let him go.”

“Yeah.” You say softly. “And this time I won’t let him go... Nami, I think…”

“You have feelings for Sanji? Yeah we all already know, took you long enough to realize.”

You gasp and stare at her in despair.

“What? Does he..?”

“He has no idea, but the man is head over heels for you. As soon as Luffy gets here… let’s go get him.” She says looking at you with a large smile.

When Luffy got to Zou and found you all, he agreed he needed to go after him. You were the first person to say you were tagging along. After a few days on Zou helping the minks and making plans, you head to Whole Cake Island in the hopes of bringing Sanji home to the Sunny. Once on Whole Cake island you, Luffy, Nami, Chopper, and Carrot got lost in the seducing woods. Big Moms daughter, Brûlée, managed to trap you in her Mirror World with Chopper and Carrot. While Luffy and Nami set off to find Sanji. Later using a shard of mirror you find a chance to contact Luffy and Nami for an update on their progress. While you were trapped in the mirror world you learn they had found Sanji, and he had beaten Luffy in a fight. He ultimately, refused to come back. You couldn’t believe your ears at the news. That wasn’t the Sanji you knew.

Luffy’s new plan was to wait for Sanji to come to him. You, Carrot, and Chopper continued to work on finding a way out of the mirror world, so you could reconnect with him and Nami.

In a moment of selfishness as your thoughts went only to Sanji, you make a plan to escape alone from the Mirrorworld. You had seen a reflection of Sanji in a nearby mirror and decided to use Brûlée to get back to the real world, through that same Mirror. While tied up, you managed to trip one of her guards causing them to tumble and almost knock over her stew pot. While Brulee was yelling at them for this, you managed to inch your way up to grab something sharp to cut through your rope bonds from a nearby counter. Once freed, you waited for Brûlée to head towards the mirror where you had earlier seen Sanji’s reflection. You looked at Chopper and Carrot and threw the sharp object behind your back for them to begin working on their ties. You inched closer to them.

“I’m going to go find Sanji. Can you two find Luffy and Nami?” You whisper.

“You want to split up? Why don’t we go together?” Chopper whispered urgently.

“If Luffy couldn’t get through to Sanji, I’m the only one who still has a chance. You and Carrot get out of here. Besides, if Big Mom’s family is as big as they say, I’m better off going in alone, less likely to be detected. I’ll take a piece of mirror for updates. Good luck.” You say softly as you eye Brûlée walking towards the mirror you need.

The rabit and train man suddenly turn their backs to you, distracted by the smell of the stew. You hop to your feet and run towards the mirror where Sanji’s reflection used to be. She screams as you grab her wrist and pull her towards the mirror with you. You cross through the mirror, and as you exit, you drop her wrist. Once out of the mirror, you turn around and watch as she stares at you, stunned. The creatures working with her begin to run towards the mirror. As they do so, you grab the mirror from the wall and smash it on the ground.

“Well that may have been a bit loud.” You whisper to yourself.

You turn about the room and notice you’re in a bedroom. No one was inside. Inside the room there was a dresser, a bed, a small table, a few chairs, a kitchenette, and a now shattered mirror. It must be where they were keeping Sanji in the Whole Cake Chateau, you thought.

You find a nearby door of a closet and jumped inside. You wait a few minutes, but no one enters after the crash of the mirror. You exit the closet and re-examine the room.

You weren’t sure where Sanji was or when he would come back. You decided your best bet was to hide behind where the door swung open, just in case an enemy entered. About 30 minutes later Sanji entered the room, alone. Upon entering the room he stared at the storm brewing out the window by his bed. You let the guards that escorted Sanji to his room exit and shut the door fully before you acted.

“Sanji.” You whispered.

He gasped nearly dropping his cigarette as you called to him. He turned around and there you were. You were wearing a short sleeved white ruffled dress, the top of which, emphasized your breasts and showed some cleavage. The bottom of the dress cut just below your ass and had a pink apron over it. It was a bit tattered after your fights in the seducing woods and in the mirror world.

You stepped forward towards Sanji and his body tensed. You continued towards him and buried your face in his chest. You gripped at his shirt and began to sob. He immediately clamped back down on his cigarette and wrapped his arms around you. He pulled you in for a deep embrace and paused to smell your hair. His breath caught in his throat as he pulled you arms length away from him. He stared down at you in disbelief, but you weren’t ready to look at him.

“Y/N. What are you doing here? I told Luffy I wasn’t coming back.”

You finally looked away from his chest and stared up at him with tear filled eyes.

“Sanji. I won’t let you go. I… I need you.”

“Wha..” He stuttered out.

As he did so, his cigarette hit the ground below him. Sanji quickly realized this and stamped it out before the carpet got set alight. He never let go of your waist as he did so. Once that situation was handled his gaze returned to you. Your eyes glistened with tears and you took a deep breath.

“I didn’t believe Luffy. I had to hear you say it yourself.” You said as you move your hands to his arms.

He stared at you a moment with his teeth clenched. He looked down at the floor where his cigarette laid, burnt out.

“Y/N. Im sorry I lied to you all about who I was. I’m sorry you came all this way for me, but I’m marrying Pudding tomorrow. She wants to marry me and I think I’ll be happy with her. There is nothing Luffy or… you… can do to stop me”

Your hands dropped down from his upper arms to rest on his forearms and your head falls.

“Even if I told you..”

Sanji’s body tensed against your hands. He stared down at you intently.

“Even if I told you I loved you.” You reply as you stared intently at his chest, taking a moment to get the words out before you glanced up at him.

He grunted in surprise and stared at you blankly. He then closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

“Y/N. I love you too…”

He looked down at you and you raised your head to look up at him. He tucked a piece of hair behind your ear and smiled.

“You’re incredible Y/N-swan and you’re unbelievably beautiful… but…” He said as he closed his eyes and sighed again. “Hours ago I would’ve done anything to hear those words… but now… I can’t… I can’t leave. I have to see this through.”

“Why?” You said as you griped his shirt sleeves tighter.

“For your safety!” He said as he pulled you tighter to him.

“I can protect myself!”

“Not against this… you, Luffy, Nami, Zeff, everyone. None of you are safe. My staying keeps you safe.”

“I don’t care. We are strong, we don’t need you to save us!” You yell as you looked deeper into his eyes.

“You’re strong, but not enough for this…. Y/N you have to go.” He said as he pulled you into a tight embrace.

He planted a kiss on your forehead and held you tight against his chest a moment. You wrapped your arms around his neck and hugged him back.

“If you really love me, you’ll let me go. You’ll help Luffy become King of the Pirates and make sure he and the crew stay fed.”

You nod your head against his chest. You squeezed him tight one more time, then pulled back. You placed your hands on his chest and lifted your head to look him in the eye one last time.

“Sa…Sanji… if this is really it. Then…”

He looked at you, and softly smiled. He caressed your check a moment and slipped his fingers under your chin. He tilted your chin up and kissed you. His lips were soft and tasted of cigarettes and vanilla. He was gentle at first, but his passion quickly grew as both of remembered this would be your first and only kiss.

You moved your hands behind his neck and curled your fingers in his hair, pulling him deeper into you. His tongue began to stroke your lips and you opened wider, allowing your tongues to dance together. Next, You pulled a hand from his hair and began to slide it down his chest, pausing at his peck to push him away from you. You looked down at where you and his feet meet and slowly trailed your eyes up his body to meet his gaze. You stared at each other in silence a moment before you began to speak.

“Sanji… just once… I need you.”

Your gaze darted to his lips, then back to his eyes. A small drop of blood came out of his nose as he stared at you, wide eyed. You chuckled and step away from him to grab a tissue off the table. You returned and wiped his nose, setting it on the table beside you. Once you had, Sanji grabbed you by your wrist and pulled you back into his chest, placing his lips back against yours.

He kissed you more intensely than the first time. You began unbuttoning the buttons on his dress shirt as he started kissing and biting down your neck. Once his shirt was unbuttoned, you began licking and kissing down his chest and abdomen. At the same time, your hands slowly traced their way down his abs to the hardened bulge forming in his pants. His head fell back and he moaned as you clawed at the fabric of his pants.

“No princess, I should take care of you.” He said as he reached down to pull your lips back up to his.

You shook him off and began unzipping and unbuttoning his pants. You paused during this, to kiss and lick right above his waistband before you tugged his pants down. You watched as his erect length flopped out and slapped your chest. His pants fell to his feet and you looked up at him with a smile.

“And I want you to drip down my throat first.” You say with an eyebrow raise as Sanji swooned.

You dropped to your knees in front of him and his erect length. As you did he pulled his shirt off his shoulders and looked down at you with a loving smile.

You gently placed your hands on his knees and kissed up his legs to his length, slowly moving your hands up as you went. You leaned back and wrapped your hands around his length. One hand wasn’t enough to hold it all. You raise your eyebrows with a smirk and look at him when you realize this, placing a second hand around him. He grunted as you began to lick his pink tip with your tongue. You moved one of your hands to play with his balls while you teased his tip a few times. He began to moan and claw at your hair and neck. You smiled against him, then moved your hand from his balls back to his length.

You dropped your tongue back into your mouth and allowed your lips to spread wider. You gently pushed your mouth forward allowing your lips to swallow his length. He moaned as it slide fully into your mouth. You began bobbing your head against his length, gradually taking more and more in your mouth with each entrance.

Sanji couldn’t take it anymore, his hand moved to grip the back of your head and his hips began to undulate against your face. You smiled against his hard member and shifted your hands to his ass. You moaned as took control the pace and amount being shoved down your throat.

“Taking me beautifully, Princess. Going to cum..”

You smiled and tried to nod, but his pace was too quick. Your eyes started to water. You felt his length begin to twitch as he slammed his member against the back of your throat. You moaned as he repeated this once more. His seed shot down the back of your throat and he began to pant. He pulled his cock from between your lips and you swallowed. You stick out your tongue and showed him it was clean.

“Fuck, Y/N. You’ve never been as beautiful as when you were just taking me. You’re a goddess.” He replied looking at you as you got back to your feet.

You smiled, then turn your back to him and pointed to your zipper. His eyes widened as he reached for it. He unzipped it slowly, taking the time to kiss down your shoulders and back as unzipped. He pushed the sleeves off your shoulders and let the dress fall to the floor in front of you. He embraced you from behind and began playing with your breasts. He squeezed at your hard buds with one hand and trailed his other down to your underwear. He carefully pushed your panties to the side and started feeling between your slick folds.

“This wet for me already, princess? What’s daddy to do?” He asked as he continued rubbing your folds and squeezing at your nipples.

You moaned and pushed your back and ass harder against his chest and exposed member. He stopped playing with you a moment to push down your underwear. You take that moment to turn around and let him see you from the front. He gulped hard and clearly stopped breathing as he stared.

“Well daddy, do you like what you see?”

Sanji’s eyes went wide and his nose began to bleed again. His arms dropped from your waist and he fumbled to reach for a tissue to clean his nose up. As he did, you sensually sauntered over to the bed and laid back, spreading your legs wide.

“You got one night Sanji.” You said as you flip your hair and sat up on your elbows. “Come show me cooks know how to eat too.” You said with a devilish smirk.

Sanji drooled as he ran towards you and jumped on the bed. He paused in front of your core and stared at it a few moments with delight. He then began to kiss up your thighs towards your core. Once at your core he looked up at you and smiled.

“You’re beautiful, my love. Daddy can’t wait to show you how a goddess deserves to be treated.”

He kissed and licked your Clit. As he did, you laid your head back on the pillows behind you and reached for the bed beneath you. He moved his tongue down to lick at your entrance. Your feet lifted and dropped against the bed at the anticipation of his tongue entering you.

“Sanji.” You called with a desperate moan as your right hand ruffled his hair.

You felt his tongue moving in the shape of what you guessed to be letters at your entrance. His left hand moved and started to slowly rub your clit, the action of which made your body shudder. You felt Sanji’s mouth form a smile and his tongue begin to lap at your insides. Your knees bent inward towards him and he moaned at your taste. He continued circling your clit with his left hand and curled his tongue to hit your spot. He started slow then bobbed his tongue out of you quicker and quicker. You begin to feel heat build in your core.

“Sa—-nnn-ji.”

He smiled again, then moved 2 fingers on his right hand to push in and out of you. His tongue curled at your spot faster and faster. Your hips buckled against his hands and face.

“Sanji!” You moan as your juices squirt on his tongue and fingers.

He began licking your juices with his tongue, but continued pushing his fingers in and out of you as he did.

You moved your hands to your sensitive nipples and began rubbing them as Sanji cleaned you up. Your hips still moved softly against him. You moaned at the touch of his tongue and of your hands against yourself.

“Sanji…. I- need you.” You pulled him up by his hair and looked at him with raised eyebrows.

He nodes and moved his chest up to rest above yours. He placed his arms above yours and began to kiss you. His once again, hardened member flopped on your stomach. You moved your hands to pump it a few times. He moved a hand to meet yours on his length. You let him take over and run your hands up his chest to rest around his neck. As you did, he moved his length to your folds and began to rub it up and down.

You moaned against his lips. He chuckled and began kissing down your neck and chest to your breasts. At your breasts he bit and sucked at your hardened buds.

“Can’t wait anymore, need you inside.” You called as your fingers fumbled through his hair.

“As you wish, princess.” He said as he stopped sucking on your hardened nipples and returned to look into your eyes.

He moved his length to your entrance and kissed you softly as he slowly and gently entered you. He gave you a few moments to adjust to his length before he started to push in and out. He pulled away from your lips and admired the bounce of your breasts for a few seconds.

“My princess, my goddess, is so tight for me.” He moaned as he continued to buck his hips against yours causing his member to go deeper towards your cervix.

“Now that you’re adjusted, how about riding me, princess? I want a better view of those perfect tits bouncing.”

You nodded. He grabbed your waist and your back and you held on to his shoulders. In one fluid motion, he flipped on his back and you were on top of him without him ever leaving your core. You moved your hands to his chest and began rolling your hips, your core tightened around him as you did. He played with your breasts and admired you atop him.

“So pretty. I’m the luckiest man in the world. I could die happy.” He swooned while you got your bearings atop him.

Once you got your bearings you began to bounce on him, moving your arms to his legs for balance. You bounced, slow at first, but quickly picking up the pace. He moaned as he watched you roll your hips against him with your bounces. As his climax began to build he moved a hand to rub your clit, causing the heat in your belly to start to rise.

“Sanji going to cum.” You muttered.

“Me too princess, where would you like me too?”

“Innnsideee.” You begged as your eyes crossed.

You leaned forward on him and quickened the pace of your bouncing, while he pushed on and twirled his thumb over your clit. Your tits bounced in his face, awakening something in him. He moved his hands around your waist and thighs and took over control of the pace. He slammed his length into your cervix a few times and you moan as his length twitched in you. His juices spilled from your core and you moaned at the feeling of wetness on your thighs. You continued to rock against him as he moaned. As you did, he moved his hand back to your clit, rubbing two fingers over it. Your core tightened at the touch, his length twitched a bit more, and your heat burst atop his member.

“Sanji!”

You fell on top of him and both of you panted. Once you’d both caught your breath, you rolled off him and moved to lay against his side. He kissed you softly at first, then he pulled you closer and it became deeper and more fervent. Then, suddenly he pushed you away. He moved to sit on the side of the bed and reached for something to clean himself up with. He then sat there and sighed. You sat up and wrapped your arms around his neck and kissed his cheek. He placed his hands over yours around his neck.

“I’m sorry princess, funs over.” He said as he kissed your hand and removed your arms from his neck.

He got up and began to get dressed, stopping only to bring you your clothes and something to clean up with. You stared at him a moment then sighed and join him in getting dressed. Once dressed you headed to the door. Tears formed in your eyes as you reached for the handle. A hand grabbed yours and turned you to look back at him.

“Thank you for everything, Y/N. I’m sorry I couldn’t be more for you. For the crew. I’m sorry I failed you all.” He said with his head tilted down.

You leaned up and kissed his cheek, then headed out the door. He followed you a few steps out the door to give an excuse to eggplant (the guard on his detail). He watched you go and his eyes began to water.

[damn-stark]

Chapter 4 Snow on the beach

Chapter 4 of Moonlight

A/N- last full Cregan chapter, now onto Aemond, let’s see if he can beat Lord Stark

Warning- Swearing, ANGST, FLUFF!, Talks of blood and death, suggestive nfsw, LONG CHAPTER.

Pairing- Cregan Stark x Velaryon!fem-reader, Aemond Targaryen x Velaryon!fem-reader

Episode- Before 1x08

(If you want to be tagged let me know)

————

*127 AC*

“…we’re hoping for a girl, so if the gods are generous you will have that sister you always wanted, wouldn’t that be great?

Daemon also hopes for the babe to be a girl. He said maybe you could choose a name, would you like that? I think it’s a marvelous idea, please write your ideas.”

A girl? Your mother is hoping for a girl again?

Maybe it’s because you’re far away from her and you haven't seen her in four years, but the idea of her having another daughter besides you makes you feel bitter with jealousy.

Is that cruel to feel?

“Anyway, I’m glad you have made friends with Lady Arra, I hate the thought of you being alone so far away. Tell me is she kind? It’s okay to admit if she’s rude and a bitch—”

You snicker softly at your mother's words regardless of your previous feelings.

“—it’ll stay between us. But if you don’t feel comfortable telling your mother then tell your cousins or your brothers. They won’t tell, trust me, Jacaerys never wants to show me what you write to each other now, but, it makes me glad that you share a bond regardless of distance. I know he misses you as I do, my Sweet.

I love you so much.

Love always, your mother, Rhaenyra.”

You put the letter down on the desk and simply smile softly. You don’t cry anymore when you read her letters.

The first two years that's all you could do, cry as you read what your mother, grandmother, brothers, and even what your cousins wrote. You just longed to be by their side again, you missed them terribly. But when your rendezvous with Cregan changed to secret forbidden romantic nights, you stopped crying at night and when you read the letters from home.

Now albeit you feel like starting crying again. Is it stupid to feel jealous about her having another daughter? Is it foolish to feel like you’ll be replaced?

You’re so far away, and you’ll always be far away because of your marriage to Aemond, so having another daughter will cure that longing to have you with her. Having another daughter also means she’ll replace you because it’s a daughter shared with the man she’s in love with, not someone she married out of political gain, not someone who had different preferences. She’ll be the apple of your mother's eye, of their eye—

No! No, it’s stupid, you’re being stupid. Your mother loves you, she’ll never do such a terrible thing.

Albeit…before, when she was with Ser Harwin hoping for another girl you didn't fill you with jealousy then because at least you had your father; he wasn’t always available, but he was there, he loved you too. He’s gone now though, so if she does replace you you’ll have no one.

——

*4 FEW YEARS BACK*

“All right, now…” he trails off and glances around the ship, you follow his line of gaze to see what he’d point to, but he then turns around and points at something else completely. “…that. What do we call that and what’s its use?”

You squint your eyes on the large spar that extends forward from the ship's vessel prow and think back to what he and Ser Qarl have taught you whilst on your way to Dragonstone.

Out of all the things you’ve learned, it takes time to come up with the answer right away, but it then comes to mind. “It’s the bowsprit!” You clap with excitement. “And it prevents the ship from…uh, being submerged in water when the waters are rough!”

“Yes!” Your father exclaims. “Yes! Good job.”

You skip forward and then speak to Ser Qarl. “I’ve thought of a scenario, all right, Ser Qarl.”

Said man leans his arm against a barrel and scoffs in amusement before he softly throws his chin up to gesture you to share what he asked of you a while ago. Something you thought of with a lot of precaution.

“I’m on deck, and then whoa, I get attacked,” you tell him as you clasp your hands back and walk towards the quarter-deck. “Pirates are coming on the ship, my crew is getting hurt, so then I run forward, use my blade to cut the main yard, and swing across the deck to save them, and myself.” You finish proudly and spin around to face both men with a smile. “Huh? Is that good?”

Ser Qarl and your father share a glance and break into a chuckle, making your smile falter. They think it’s stupid, don’t they?

You knew it! It’s too dramatic and childish.

“That’s…” your father clears his throat and walks over to you to wrap his arm around your shoulders. “That’s a great plan, darling, well thought out.”

You look up at him with uncertainty and probe. “Really?”

He shoots you a grin and nods. “Yes, really.”

“You’ll make a fine sailor,” Ser Qarl compliments. “Probably one better than your father.”

You're quick to please so once again you can’t help but bring back your smile to your features.

“Yes,” your father agrees. “You will. You’ll make a legendary sailor.”

——

*NOW*

“See! That’s how you do it!” Cregan exclaims and flashes a smile as he admires how the arrow impales exactly at the center of the makeshift target. “Let’s see you best that.”

What if he wants to replace you, Prince Daemon?

He has daughters, but those are his own, what if for some reason he just wants to replace you?

Cregan calls your name, but you don't answer or look his way. Instead, you stay lost in your mind and think that it’s unbelievable that your mother would want to replace you. She loves you, all of you, in fact, she was often advised that she not be so affectionate towards any of you, especially towards your brothers, so she wouldn’t just replace you.

No?

Cregan calls for you again and this time touches your shoulder, snapping you from your messy thoughts raveld in your brain.

“Yes?” You query and meet his curious grey eyes.

Cregan blinks and then points at the target with his eyes. “It’s your turn darling,” he says and quickly looks back at you to study you.

Albeit before he catches anything, you pick up your bow and an arrow to then go stand where Cregan was. You exhale softly to try and forget what you were thinking of while you shift your feet and lift your arms. You get the arrow in position and get ready to shoot it, but hands then fall on your arms, making your breath catch and your gaze drift to the corner of your eyes to look at Cregan behind you.

“Relax your bow arm,” he advises softly as he holds your gaze the entire time.

You can’t help but smile and stare at his lips.

“You did hear me?” He asks.

You relax your bow arm like he said and nod.

“Just making sure. You’re not looking at me in the eyes,” he teases.

You laugh softly and slowly meet his gaze with a playful smirk. He snickers and then steals a quick peck from your lips before he stands back.

You flash him a giddy grin before you look back at the makeshift target and draw out a soft exhale again before letting the arrow fly.

Albeit the arrow whizzes past the target clung onto a thin tree.

“I see,” Cregan stifles his laugh and crosses his arms over his chest. “That was terrible.”

You sigh and lower your arm to stand back without meeting his gaze—your mind is just too lost.

“Your teacher must not be so good, you missed the target. You’re usually good,” he continues to tease.

You drop your arms and huff. “The tree is too thin,” you throw out the first complaint that comes to mind.

“The target isn’t the problem,” Cregan points out honestly. “When we go hunting the prey is moving. At battle, the target is moving as well. This. this is easy.”

“I won’t use a bow and arrow,” you remark and briefly meet his gaze. “I’ll have a sword in battle, and Astraea.”

Since you glance up as if you could see Astraea overhead you miss the way Cregan watches you and sees right through your troubled mind right away.

“The target isn’t the problem,” he repeats and leans his equipment against the tree behind him to approach you. “What’s wrong? What troubles you?” He asks softly and takes the stuff from your hands to put it by his.

You know you’ll sound like a total whiner, a spoiled brat most likely. He’s more humble than most of the people at Kings Landing, so he probably won’t agree, but all these thoughts are overflowing your mind and they’re beginning to drown you, you can’t hold back anymore. Besides he is your best friend, and your…paramour? Partner?

No that sounds too official, you aren’t. Paramour sounds right—he’s your secret paramour. He should know what troubles you.

“It’s,” you begin to share and sigh deeply. “It’s my mother. She’s with child again.”

He hums and just like you predicted he responds nicely which contradicts your frown and gleaming eyes. “That’s great news, I’m happy for you….” He trails off as he notices your reaction and backtracks. “Is it not great news?”

You mindlessly grab the pendant your grandmother had given you and mutter. “They’re hoping for a girl, again. Aegon came out as a boy so they’re hoping for a girl this time…to replace me.”

Cregan sighs and shakes his head as he looks at you as if you’re mad. “What? Darling, why would you think that?”

Tears fall out of your eyes as you’re overwhelmed with sorrow you can’t surpass. “Because,” your voice quivers. You can’t even look at Cregan in the eyes or else you’ll just feel a worse anguish in your heart. “Unlike Aegon and this new baby, they’ll have soon, I wasn’t made out of love. My parents had a duty to commit, not Prince Daemon and my mother. They love each other, their kids are made out of love. She wants to replace me with a daughter she wasn’t forced to have. A different daughter that…” you trail off and shake your head whilst you wipe the tears that manage to break out. “…that’s not like me.”

Cregan sighs softly and closes the gap between the two of you with an embrace. “Oh my darling girl,” he says as he begins to caress your back. “That’s the most maddest thing I’ve heard.”

Now that you’re in his embrace, as his comforting smell filters into your nose you can no longer hold back your tears, you cry softly as you hug him.

“I may not know your mother, but from what you’ve told me, it seems she loves you,” he assures you. “She’d never replace you. Never. Who would replace a woman like you?” He asks and pulls back to cup your cheeks. “It’s like if you had a daughter already, wouldn't you want another if the gods were generous enough?”

Well, when he puts it that way.

“I suppose I would,” you whisper.

Cregan offers you a faint smile and nods. “See? You just miss your mother, that’s all. Besides you’re her eldest, you’re special to her, you always will be no matter who comes along.” He assures you while he wipes your tears away before he leans in and presses a gentle kiss on your lips and on your forehead.

“You’ll always be my favorite girl regardless.” he finishes saying to lift your spirits.

And you can't help it, you slowly begin to smile before you steal a lingering kiss that he takes over and deepens. When you pull back you lean your forehead against his and wipe his lips with your thumb.

“Thank you, Cregan,” you whisper with your heart beginning to race as words just run up your throat. “I don’t know how I’d survive being so far away without you.”

The corner of his lips tug to a soft smile. “I’m the one that should be thankful,” he whispers against your lips. “The gods put you in my life and saved me from this loneliness I was bestowed with.”

Your entire face burns and you can’t help but flash him a blissful beaming grin before slamming your lips against his. Right away Cregan slides his hands to the sides of your head and begins to push you back against the tree, whilst your hands travel to the back of his neck, and your nails dig into his skin.

Driven by passion Cregan then begins to slide his hands down, letting them linger on your breasts before he tears open the top part of your dress, making you gasp. Yet your disbelief is short-lived because you then give in and unbuckle his shirt.

Albeit, soon thereafter he forces himself away and lets his head hang low as if suddenly troubled. You try to ease his stress by grabbing his face and reaching for more but he stops you. “Who would I be if I made you mine?” He mumbles between pants. “I can’t.”

Your smile softens as you're quick to reassure him. “You won’t dishonor yourself or me because I love you.”

Cregan holds your gaze in disbelief but can’t help his smile from spreading on his face. “We said we wouldn't fall in love.” He reminds you of your ultimatum.

You sigh. “I couldn’t resist myself, not when you’re the very breath in my lungs. Without you, I can’t breathe.”

It might be foolish to say, no it is stupid since you won’t marry, but it’s a truth you can’t hide. Not from him, not when he’s driven you too madly in love. And especially not when he grins so tenderly for you.

“If that’s so then I can finally relieve myself of this weight I’ve been carrying for too long and say that I love you too,” he confesses with a sense of relief as if he had been forced to hold it all back.

And you knew it’s a bad idea, you told yourself you wouldn’t give in to such passionate temptations, but you’re a woman pushed away from the mother who could teach her the reality, you remember her loving passionately and freely and you can’t help but live by those terms and smile at the man before you before you feed your forbidden passion by stealing a kiss.

“Give me the privilege of giving me your maidenhead then,” he whispers against your lips and steals the very breath from your lungs—“give me the privilege of being mine. Only mine.”

You meet his gaze and never think about Aemond, he doesn’t cross your mind when you’re with Cregan. He should be the very thing that stops you, but he's left you alone, so neither you nor Cregan think of the consequences of what could happen, you’re too driven by lust, passion, and by love.

“As long as you are mine,” you whisper impatiently as you pull his shirt off.

Cregan smirks and nods. “From this day until the end of my days,” he whispers happily against your lips as he holds your gaze and nothing else.

——

*A FEW MONTHS LATER*

“You know when I was a little girl I used to be scared of the North,” you tell Cregan while you admire a flame dancing on a candle on your end table.

“Why’s that?” He asks with some amusement playing in his tone.

You snicker and peer back at him with a smirk. “The servants' children said that giant spiders roamed the snowy lands and that northern men were big, brutish, and stole women from the homes of their husbands.”

Cregan pulls his hand away from your bare hip and you can practically hear those dark eyebrows furrow while those pink pouted lips only crease to a frown.

When you churn your head you’re proven right when you see him looking at you with a pointed look. “They say that?” He presses as if those people had personally offended him.

Your smirks turns to a teasing smile and you nod. “A lot of people like to make up reality when they don’t know it.”

Cregan grumbles and turns to lie on his back and look at the canopy overhead. You ache for more of his gentle but rough fingers so you turn and tangle your legs with his while you place your hand on his chest.

“Did you ever imagine you’d love a brutish man?” Cregan asks and almost sounds deeply serious.

You snicker and tease him. “Do I? Or did this man take me from my quarters and make me his?”

Cregan blinks and turns his head down with a smile he can’t help but flash at you. “Maybe it’s you who has cast a spell on me. I heard that the Valyrians were blood sorcerers.”

You giggle and sigh longingly. “I wish I could do such a thing, but the practice is forbidden and lost in your family, unfortunately. My natural beauty is the only thing that took you under a spell.”

Cregan blesses your ears with a hearty chuckle before he flips swiftly and captures you under him. You bite your cheeks to not yelp out of excitement and alert a servant or a guard.

“That is indeed true,” he flatters you and leans down to capture your lips in his. “You have a bewitching beauty.”

You grin and hook your arms around his neck to keep him close. “Oh, I like that.” You coo. “It makes me sound frightening.”

He hums and averts his gaze before interjecting. “No not bewitching then. Enchanting.”

Your smile softens and you can’t help but look at him softly as if he had just made you fall in love with his words alone.

“Tell me,” he continues to fill the comforting silence. “What else did you think of when you were young? More fake stories about northern men?”

You chuckle softly and shake your head. “Well,” you part your lips and sigh deeply as you think back to several years worth of thoughts, casting a long silence.

Cregan doesn’t mind the silence though, he liked to watch you in the silence like an admirer watches art they find fascinating; he never could get enough of the beauty before him. He even liked to admire you while you parted your lips.

“Without getting too depressing—”

Yet you don’t get to finish because the door handle suddenly clicks before the door bursts open, leaving you no time to attempt to hide, only leaving a second for Cregan to flip himself off you.

Nevertheless, the intruder happens to be Arra, Cregan’s wife, and your closest friend.

It turns out that Arra didn’t turn out to be the concern you worried she’d be, unexpectedly she turned out to be a good friend even if you do love her husband. Sure it took time to become friends mostly because you pushed away the possibility out of your fear that she hated you, but she doesn’t.

It also turns out that her preferences are different, she enjoys the company of women, mainly that of her handmaiden. She just put on an act that day Cregan became Lord to fool the masses. Which is a relief, you probably wouldn't be able to handle the guilt if she actually loved him.

“Arra,” Cregan hisses and pulls the furs over you to cover up your bare chest.

“Forgive me,” she mutters as she quickly closes the door behind her before she waltzs in and throws herself next to you on the bed. “I grew bored listening to all the maester had to tell me so I pretended I needed to talk to my husband.”

One would think you would be appalled that she’s lying next to Cregan and you with nothing on but the furs keeping you warm, but, well in your time together, as you’ve grown closer it’s just something you do and don’t question. For one, Arra says she finds no romantic interest in Cregan, and he’s her husband under the old gods, secondly, she jokes that she’s basically married to you too because of how much Cregan loves you, so it’s just like partners being in bed with one another; arra says.

As for Cregan and you, well, you’ve grown accustomed to it, and to keep up appearances you’ve chosen to find a taste for it.

“It’s one of the dreading days isn’t it?” You query Arra knowingly. “That’s why I pretend Astraea needs tending to. They don’t bother me when I say I’m with her.”

Arra rolls her eyes and Cregan frowns at the canopy—“I really detest that I have to suffer through the Maesters dreadful lectures without you. You’re my ward, you're meant to suffer with me.”

You snicker. “I suffered through enough of them with the previous Lady, and I will have to suffer through worse lectures in Kings Landing, I’m taking advantage of your kindness.”

Arra snaps her head to you, and you meet her gaze and you both break into laughter.

“You know we were in a conversation,” Cregan cuts in quite annoyed that your precious moments were so rudely interrupted.

You don’t mind Arra barging and find it as an excuse to see Cregan later so you drag her in your conversation. “He asked me what I would think about when I was young.”

Arra hums curiously and fixes herself to get comfortable, much to Cregan’s protest.

“Well,” you finally share your long-awaited response. “When my head wasn't literally in the clouds or fantasizing about my desires, I would often think about my future. Who I would marry, where I would go, what would happen to me, and who I wanted to be.”

A silence lingers where both Arra and Cregan think about what you said and why someone young would have to think about something so serious so early on. They both grew curious about who it is you wanted to be before a future was chosen for you, but Cregan beats Arra to the question.

“Who is that you wanted to be?”

You sigh dreamily and rest your head on his shoulder first before you tell the tale you were forced to leave behind along with your childhood. “Besides wanting to be a sailor, or an explorer, or a singer, I wanted to be Queen, a kind one like great, great grandmother Queen Alyssane, and my ancestor Queen Rhaenys.”

“Queen?” Arra probes between a joke and a serious demeanor.

You nod softly. “I was the eldest, I thought it was my right, but well…” you trail off and leave it untouched because they know why your dreams weren’t granted. Albeit you do defend yourself. “Not that I resent my brother, I never have, I kept dreaming after that dream was crushed.” You smile softly and that assures Cregan that he can poke at you now.

“What is it you wanted after that? To be a pirate? Isn’t that something you asked to be?”

You laugh and nod against his chest, letting him wrap his arm around your head to press you against him. “Yes well, besides that I dreamt of things I could never be, things I no longer crave because…my feet around on the ground now, and because when I think about tomorrow I see the people I love beside me.”

Another silence follows and this time it’s not so tense, it’s comforting and full of sweet bliss. Arra breaks it and what she shares doesn’t bring tension. “I was in crisis when I was young because I learned I fancied women, and then I hated the fact that I would have to marry a man.”

“I wanted to meet a giant that I thought lived far north,” Cregan shares and right away Arra and you share a knowing look because compared to Arra and you, that was such a sweet and weightless response. He doesn’t seem to understand what his response meant though, so when Arra and you start laughing he’s just left puzzled.

“What is it? I’m being serious, aren’t you?”

——

*128 AC*

Screams fill the room while the sour metallic smell of blood begins to filter the room.

“Come on my Lady push! The babe is almost out!” The midwife instructs Arra.

Albeit Arra throws her head back and shakes her head. “I can’t,” she cries out shakily. “I can’t! It hurts! Please don’t make me go on, please,” she begs with streams of tears mixing with the thick beads of sweat that bathe her face.

“Arra,” you mumble and lean over to grab her jaw and tilt her head to the side so she can meet your gaze. “Arra, I know it hurts, I know, but you have to keep going for your babe. If you don’t then they’ll die,” you share the harsh truth so she can get inspired. “The pain is almost over. I promise.”

Seeing and hearing her in pain is something you don’t want to witness, you know the possibility of her outcome and it frightens you; not for selfish reasons, but rather because she’s your friend, your best friend and you know how cruel childbirth can be and she doesn’t deserve to suffer.

You want to be back to when it was just Cregan, you, and her, simple and serene times. Days when you’d sit under the old weirwood tree with her, and her lady paramour, Genevieve, and sing a sweet song to the babe still growing in her belly.

“Something,” she stammers as she holds your gaze. “Something feels wrong.”

You look up to meet the gaze of her handmaiden and lover and mirror a concerned look before you look at the abnormal amount of blood that is pooling around her.

“We won’t let anything bad happen to you,” Genevieve assures her even if you’re both starting to know the cruel truth.

“Promise,” she continues to say in a way that doesn’t involve the others but doesn’t give away that her words are coming solely from her own aching heart.

“Push, my Lady, push!” They instruct again, and she listens, she puts as much effort as she can into delivering the babe that Cregan and her managed to make. However, she loses too much blood as the babe struggles to come out of her.

Arra doesn't even get to meet her son, she took her last breath as he cried for the first time, and your own heart wept at the realization.

But how does that compare to when you tell Cregan?

He didn’t love her, it’s true, but he did care for her. She was his best friend since childhood, a close confidant, and his wife. He’ll be so heartbroken and you dread seeing more of his sorrow, he was already so distressed when she began to bleed more than normal. He had to leave the room at that moment—Which in turn becomes an issue though because now no one can find him.

Albeit, you know where he is. It’s obvious too. It’s the only place he can think of going to at such a desperate moment. The Godswood.

“Cregan,” you call out as you see him sitting on a tree trunk by the red-leafed Heart tree.

Said man looks up with gleaming eyes. You don't hesitate to approach him and crouch down in front of him. “It’s a boy,” you share with a faint smile but with melancholy, he doesn't miss but ignores, Cregan actually smiles at the ground and murmurs.

“Rickon.”

You take his hands in yours and lose your smile as the dread of sharing the news begins to choke you, threatening you not to speak. Albeit he looks up at you and sees right through you again; he sees the tears stains on your cheeks, and the new tears that begin to form, and he knows he can no longer ignore the truth.

“No,” he mutters and shakes his head. “No, it cannot be true.”

You sniffle. “I’m sorry,” you whisper.

Cregan drops his head to hide his sorrow from you. After all these years he still hides his anguish, but now he doesn’t put on a brave face and then hides away in his chambers, now he lets you see his vulnerability. He lets you comfort him.

“I’m sorry,” you repeat and begin to caress his back. “I’m sorry.”

Cregan drops his head on your shoulder, letting you slide your hands around his neck so you can gently caress him and accompany him in his grief. You wish you could stay like that for a while longer, but you can't be caught being so affectionate so when the others found him you could go on pretending.

You learned to get better at pretending. In the first year of your secret relationship, you were almost caught doing things friends shouldn't do too many times, luckily it didn’t happen and a scandal didn’t spread…all because of Arra, she offered her aide then, she taught you how to be very discreet. Well, you were sneaky before, but you would get caught before, and because of her you didn’t and won’t. She helped you a lot and now she's gone with nothing left to her but her bones, and baby Rickon.

However, how can a child stop your departure? You had made the excuse when the five years were up that you wanted to wait for Arra to give birth, and the Queen granted it, but now?

Now Arra’s gone and the babe is here, meaning you will leave soon. You’ll leave Cregan...

That's what hurts too, knowing that with Arra’s death, your time here has also come to an end. You’ll have to leave and face…Aemond.

Seven hells.

You exhale deeply and fall on your bed now that you are in your semi-sheer white nightgown. All the walls that surround you that you once thought dull and bland, and the ceiling above you that you hated looking at when you first got here will soon change for you. This freedom you have here will soon change to a never-ending pester. And the people are somewhat nice, they're certainly a lot nicer now than they were the first year, they’re not racist anymore, but soon you’ll be surrounded by creeps like…Aegon.

Albeit creeps like him exist even here at Winterfell so that won’t change that much—The silence at night though, that will change and you’ll miss it too…

“Damn,” you grumble. “Maybe they should catch us together. It’ll be a bit of a scandal, but what of it?” You groan and sit up to push yourself off the end of your bed and walk to your balcony.

Perhaps the coldness is the one thing you won’t miss, but the silence? The tranquility? Cregan? You will miss him the most…

You sigh deeply again and fold your arms over the railing to rest your chin on your hands as you admire the empty street below. You let the silence linger for a moment before you begin to laugh quietly to yourself.

Once upon a time when you lived in Kings Landing, you’d look down at the streets below just past your window, and you'd see the calamity of everyday life and wish to be amongst it, now you’ve found peace here and wish to stay here in this castle amongst the tranquility. Have you grown, or have you forced yourself to make peace with your life?

You don’t know, so you sigh again and turn your head to the side, in that moment catching the rare blue winter rose in the corner of your railing.

A smile spreads on your lips and you rush over to pick it up, finding a small scroll around the stem. When you open it you see a small sentence; “meet me in my quarters.”

That’s bold of him, but you don’t argue, you’ve found ways to sneak to him. You use the same methods now with no hesitation and find yourself in his quarters, but find him looking out his own balcony. When you make sure no one is approaching you break your silence.

“Cregan?” You call out carefully, finding his still behavior odd.

Said man turns and you quickly add on. “Are you all right?”

The corner of his lips twitch to a slight smile. “Rickon is the most precious thing ever.” He begins to walk to you, and you don’t fail to head towards him as well—“You have to meet him.”

You smile. “I have. Albeit our meeting was cut short. He looks like you though.”

“You think?” He asks softly.

You nod as you meet right in the middle of his room. He takes no time to be sweet and grab your hands to wrap them with his warm ones.

“Baby Rickon makes me think of…our own children.” He makes your heart skip a beat before it begins to race. His words are absurd, you can’t be man and wife, but hearing him say those words makes it seem like a possibility.

“Hair white as snow, kind eyes like yours,” he says and cups your cheek. “Mighty children born of ice and fire.”

You can’t help but let your smile widen, and lose your mind in the impossible for a moment. You come down from that dream and face a truth he doesn’t want to see. However, instead of breaking his delusions, you let him dream because of his grief.

“How are you doing Cregan?” You ask and avoid the topic. “Be honest.”

Said man averts his gaze and lets your hands fall before he then wanders to the side of his bed to take a seat. “I,” he interjects but pauses and drops his head.

Now that racing heart you felt slows down and sinks as you see the anguish he was trying not to show. You approach him and sink down beside him on his bed.

“I feel as if I could have done more,” he reveals and looks up to meet your gaze, letting you see the tears that gleam over his eyes. “I know I didn’t love her as I possibly should have, but she was still my friend, and she died and I couldn’t stop it.”

You shake your head and press your hand on the side of his neck to caress him gently. “It wasn’t your fault,” you comfort him. “You did not do this. What happened to Arra unfortunately is normal. There was no preventing it. It was simply the Gods will. I’m sorry.”

Cregan swallows thickly and drifts his gaze away again, letting you press his head against your chest to be able to embrace him and keep him close to your heart.

“Now what you can do to honor her memory is be Rickon’s father,” you add quietly. “He’ll need you, Cregan.”

Cregan pulls away and faces you with tears rolling down his cheeks. “I don’t know how to be a father.”

“Who is?” You counter softly. “We don’t spend our lives training to be parents. You’ll struggle, everyone does, but you’ll know one step at a time as life moves on. Be the father yours was to you,” you try to assure him as you cup his jaw.

Cregan holds your gaze for a lingering minute, his lips part and his gaze softens. He doesn’t say anything for a moment that seems to go on for eternity, but then, just as you were growing insecure about what you said, he smiles before he steals a kiss from you.

“See,” he breaks his silence and grabs your cheeks. “This is why I love you. This is why you’d make a great Lady of Winterfell. Your kindness can melt the coldness that surrounds this land.”

You scoff softly and drop your eyes whilst you push his hands away and stand up off the bed. He lays down and watches you pace away.

“I’d also make a good Lady because I am stubborn, a good ruler needs that,” you play along, making him chuckle. However, you end your amusement fast and grow serious.

“But you truly can’t say that,” you mutter and grab the pillar of his bed to spin around and begin to walk to the other side. “You can’t say those things to me.” You remind him sharply.

“If I put a babe in your belly they’ll send you back to me,” he suddenly blurts, causing you to stop just as you reach the other side of the bed to stare at him in disbelief.

“You’ll have no choice but to be my wife and Lady,” he adds the fire, but regardless of the heat that basks your face you pretend to be bothered and grab a pillow off his bed to throw at him. Albeit Cregan catches it and snickers.

“My darling love,” he adds and then flips on his bed to crawl towards you. “Is that not your wish? Your greatest desire? I can put one in you now. Have you back with me in 60 days. ”

“Cregan,” you mumble and sigh with sadness knowing it’s not something that can happen. “You’d know what would happen if you did. Aemond would come after you, my family would too.”

Cregan sits up on his knees before he grabs your hand and suddenly yanks you towards him on the bed, making you yelp as you grab onto his shoulders.

“What?” He counters. “You don't think I can fight him?” He snickers and cups your face. “I’d do it. I’d fight every fucking man in this world if it meant making you my wife.”

It’s these words that only add to your ache about leaving, that only makes you swoon that much more for a man you can’t have.

“I have to—”

“Quiet,” he interrupts you and covers your mouth, making you let out a muffled scoff and twist your face to demonstrate your discontent. “Don’t say it,” he says, knowing that you were going to tell him you had to leave. “Just lay with me tonight.” He pulls his hand away from your mouth and pulls you down with him so you can lie right next to him on his bed.

You debate on dwelling on the matter, but if these are your last moments, then you want to appreciate them, so you don’t bring up your fate and just let him gently stroke your exposed back with his fingers. You snuggle against his warm chest and embrace him, you don’t think about anything but him in the comforting silence that blankets the two of you.

It’s stupid of you, but you love him.

——

*A COUPLE DAYS LATER*

Tonight is the last night you’ll ever spend together. Tonight is the last night you’ll see his beautiful face basked by the moon's soft light, tonight is the last night you’ll touch his lips, laugh, and hear his sweet voice pour in your ear like honey. Tonight is the last night you’ll be embraced by his warmth, it’s the last time you’ll have his smell filter in your nose, it’s the last time you'll hear him laugh, and see his smile painted on his features.

Tonight is the last night you can be lovers before you have to act as mere strangers passing through the night. And he’s making the most of it, acting as if nothing is going to happen. You try to act as clueless as him, but the thoughts keep coming back.

“Cregan,” you call out as he keeps walking deeper in the woods. “It’s far enough, and It’s cold, perhaps we should go to your quarters.”

Cregan peers back briefly and flashes you an assuring smile. “Not much further, just catch up.” He waves you over, forcing you to pick up your pace in the fresh snow that blankets the ground tonight. However, you come to a quick stop at the same time Cregan does when a wolf's howl breaks out from very close by; or at least that’s what it seems, maybe it’s your sudden fear that makes you hear it.

“Cregan,” you whisper sharply and approach quickly to clutch onto his arm. “Let’s go back to our usual spot, come on. These aren’t our grounds.” You look out to the depths of the woods to see if you’d find a pair of glowing eyes.

“These are my grounds,” Cregan corrects you and reaches for your hand. “Come let’s get closer.” He tugs you further, but you instantly yank him back.

“Are you mad?” You argue in panic and slight judgment. “There can be a pack of wolves out there.”

Cregan scoffs and grabs both of your hands to pull you towards him and counter. “And you have a dragon, don’t be frightened.”

“Astraea wouldn’t bite our faces off and shred us apart with her teeth,” you counter back louder. “The wolves will, and Astraea can only get here so fast.”

Cregan shoots you a smirk, just a simple smirk before he lets your hands fall to run ahead without you.

“Cregan?!” You shout as you stay put and watch as he reaches the top of the small hill before you lose his figure past some trees. “Cregan, don’t leave me alone!”

Seven hells!

Fucking man…

You squint your gaze and take a step forward, but don’t catch a glimpse of him. You just hear the sound of a wolf howling again, causing your heart to skip a beat before it starts to race as your fear heightens. “Cregan!” You call out for him again. “Don’t jest with me!”

You take another cautious step forward and stick your neck out, but still nothing.

Alas then, from the deafening silence, there’s a scream that comes from Cregan up ahead.

The wolf got him!

Rather than being hesitant, you pick up your dress's skirt and run where you saw him disappear to even if there’s a wolf close by.

“Cregan?!” You cry out desperately and proceed to come to a stop when you don’t see him or a wolf. “Cregan?!” You grab onto the tree and turn your head from side to side, however, it’s at that exact moment that hands slap against your shoulders and a quiet “boo,” is whispered in your ear, causing you to yelp and spin around hastily.

And there in the shadows is Cregan, his gray eyes reflecting his joy, while his smile shines just as bright as the stars and the moon before his evil laugh fills the silence.

“Why would you do that?!” You remark with anger before you try to shove him back. However, he catches your wrists in time.

Yet Cregan’s feet aren’t planted against the ground well, and the force you put behind your hit is strong, so he loses balance and falls backward, taking you along with him since he refuses to let go. When he hits the ground you scramble to get up, but the hill you fall on is steep, so you accidentally tumble and take him with you down the snow-covered hill.

He of course laughs the entire way down, but you find no amusement in what happened considering he had you worried sick.

“You are cruel,” you grumble the moment you stop rolling and fall on him. “You are a cruel man.”

You try to move to the side, but he grabs your hands and tugs you back down against him.

“It was only a jest, my love,” he coos and grabs your face. “I just wanted to see something.”

You shoot him a glare and shake your head. “What? How bad I can get a heart attack? I thought you got hurt.”

“And you came running, I’m honored,” he counters with a smirk before he pulls you in for a kiss. Albeit you pull away and smack his chest.

“It wasn’t funny, I was worried,” you mumble with a pout and turn your head away.

Cregan finds this more amusing so he lifts his head and tries to steal kisses from you, but you keep pushing him away and turning your head. When he finally has enough of you turning away he presses his hand against your back to flip you over with ease so he can be on top of you.

“Don’t be angry with me,” he whispers. “It’s funny, laugh.”

You hold his gaze and feign a laugh, causing him to roll his eyes.

“What is it you wanted to show me?” You ask and lift your arms to grab his biceps. “Maybe that will change my mood?”

Cregan smiles softly and caresses your cheek. “I’m more than content staying right here, I love the view.” He tries to prolong this moment with sweet words that work to make you swoon.

“Well,” you whisper reluctantly. “My view isn’t terrible either…but my ass is getting wet.”

Cregan feigns concern. “Really? Let me see.”

“Pft,” you blow out and slide your hands down his arms to grab his hands.

“Come then,” he stops messing around and keeps your hand warm under his grasp as he pulls you with him. “Let me show you the world.”

No matter the impending doom, your grin widens and that fear vanishes completely, leaving only curiosity and glee where sorrow should be. Once you arrive at where he wanted to go you immediately know you should’ve known better because this place isn’t new, you’ve been on the hill that overlooks Winterfell before. Many times actually it’s his favorite spot after all.

Regardless, the castle from higher ground is truly a beautiful sight with all the glimmering torch lights, and the moonlight dancing on the snow around the ancient grounds.

“Sit,” he demands as he extends his cloak over the ground. “This way you won’t have to get your pretty ass wet.”

You meet his gaze and snicker as you sit, letting him lie down in front of you so he can rest his head on your lap.

“I’ll miss Winterfell,” you mention as you look at the castle below while you stroke his arm. “In a month's time, it’s back to, “yes your Grace, no your Grace”. Locked towers. The insufferable Ser Criston Cole who thinks he’s high and mighty, and my fucking uncle Aegon.” You groan in frustration.

“I can go beat him bloody,” Cregan offers.

You shake your head. “No, it’s fine. I can handle him. Maybe show him a thing or two as well,” you say smugly, making Cregan smirk.

“That’s my girl,” he says.

You smile down at him and lean down to steal a kiss from his pink lips, but he doesn't fail to ruin the moment.

“If that place is such torture, then stay,” he doesn’t suggest, or persuade you, he’s demanding now.

“All your things are already here. I only need to ask your mother for your hand.”

Your smile drops, and you avert your gaze, not wanting to entertain this further. You want this to be a good last night.

“I may not be ecstatic to return to King's Landing, but I have to go see my grandfather the King, he’s clinging onto life,” you find an excuse that doesn’t involve Aemond just yet. “I miss my family. I want to see my mother soon after I arrive. As well as my brothers, my cousins, all my family who I miss terribly.” You don’t excuse yourself this time, it’s all coming from your heart's desire. You've been apart for so long and can’t really fathom another year without seeing them.

You only wish you could see your father Laenor too.

“You’ll see them at your wedding to your prince,” Cregan grumbles. “Speak the truth, you want to return to him.”

You swallow back the lump forming in your throat and then look down at him with your face contorted in slight annoyance and shock. “No,” you argue back right away to assure him. “No, Aemond…he’s a stranger to me now. We’re betrothed, he was my best friend, but he stopped sending ravens, he stopped caring. He means nothing more than a stranger does.”

Cregan sits up and turns to face you. “Then stay,” he insists. “If he truly is a stranger then stay with me. Marry me. Don’t leave me in agony.”

You sigh deeply and shake your head with a pitiful look on your face. “You know I can’t do that, it’s not that simple,” you argue for his sake and yours.

Cregan however, clenches his jaw and huffs out before adding to his argument. “I told you I’d fight him. I’ll fight everyone that comes in my way.”

You can’t let his words affect you now, no matter how fast it makes your heart race, or how hot your face burns as you grow flustered.

“We’ve kissed, we’ve laid together, you are mine,” he presses passionately. “I’ll kill him to prove it.”

“No,” you quickly rebuttal, causing him to stiffen and furrow his eyebrows as he starts to believe the opposite of what you try to tell him.

“He has the oldest dragon,” you press so he can listen to reason, while you grab Cregan's arms to keep him close. “He’d kill you first. And if he does then…” you trail off and scoff. “Then what will become of me without you?”

Cregan pushes your hands away and stands up with a scowl twisted on his face. “I don’t care because I hate the idea of him touching you, of him kissing you the way I kiss you. I fill with rage knowing he’ll be inside you.”

Your body begins to burn with desire at his words, at the sound of his jealousy, but you don’t let him tempt you, you just stand up and let him grab your cheeks.

“I don’t want him to see you smile, or-or feel your comfort,” Cregan continues to recite beautiful words. “He hurt you already,” he whispers and traces the scar on your face that Aemond accidentally left you with. “I just want you to be mine.”

You shiver at his gentle touch, you crave for more, but you still push him away. “If that’s so then…” you pause and let out a shaky sigh as your eyes fill with tears and that lump of emotions returns to crawl up your throat. “…I wish we had never become friends. I wish we had never met, or loved each other the way we do—”

“Don’t say that,” he cuts you off and approaches you, but you step back.

“I don’t want to be the bane of your existence Cregan,” you finish saying with tears rolling down your cheeks. “I told you before, that night we revealed ourselves to one another for the first time. And you,” you point. “You were okay with it. You knew what was going to happen. You know I’m stubborn, you knew nothing was going to change my fate.” You stifle your whimper and drop your head.

“Look at me,” he says sternly, making you lift your gaze to meet his gray eyes that brew like the angriest storm.

“I’d rather die tomorrow than spend a century without knowing you,” he says, making your breath catch. “You will never be the bane of my existence. Never. Forgive me.”

He approaches you and you let him this time. “But I just don’t understand why you want to marry the prince. Do you not love me?”

You nod and cup his jaw to assure him. “I love you. I just…” you hesitate. “I'm just afraid of losing you. If you win a fight for my hand, Aemond won't stop there, and I can’t even breathe with the thought of living my life without you. Sure we’ll be far from one another, but I’ll be content knowing your heart is beating, and that we are living under the same sky,” you whisper and lower one hand to press it against his chest to feel his heartbeat. “That we share the same sun, that we look at the same moon and stars.”

You offer him a sad smile and he admires it while he swallows thickly, and lingers there stiffly for a moment before he suddenly pulls you in for a deep and passionate kiss that is cut too short.

“So be it then,” he gives in as he pulls away. “I’ll let you go without a fight. I’ll ache for you every day, I’ll love you from afar and want nothing but happiness for you, my sweet love,” he tries to assure you in the way you want to be assured even if the words he says are like bile in his mouth. He presses his forehead against yours and begins to caress your face while he smiles softly at you. “If I hear that he hurt you I’ll march down there and kill him.”

You chuckle and feel tears stream down your cheeks. “Okay,” you whisper. “I’ll write to you every week. Don’t forget me.”

Cregan shakes his head and scoffs. “Don’t speak madness woman, I’d never forget you. I’ll write back every week. And if you don’t get married 6 months from now I will go to your mother personally and ask for your hand.”

You beam at him and nod, knowing that you’ll be married by then. “All right. Okay. I like the sound of that.”

Cregan pulls his head back to take in the sight of your face he thinks is so enchantingly beautiful for a lingering moment before he slams his lips on yours to kiss you again with more passion before he can’t ever again.

——

*THE NEXT MORNING*

No matter how much you keep telling yourself it was going to happen, nothing could actually prepare you for leaving Cregan and Winterfell. You couldn't even sleep a wink or eat knowing that your life was going to change again.

All your friends, Cregan, and every aspect of this life as you know it is going to become nothing but good memories. Which is very hilarious considering you dreaded coming five years ago; now you don’t want to part from it. Or him.

“Farewell, my friend,” you tell Rolf who is now a Knight, and now stands a foot over you; he was small when you first met.

“Farewell, Princess, may our paths cross again,” he redirects sweetly with a friendly smile.

You draw in a small shaky breath and nod before you step forward and surprise him with an embrace. “If you ever find yourself at King’s Landing come find me, just say you want to talk to me.” You tell him softly.

Rolf tightens his arms around you and assures you. “Of course, Princess.”

You linger in the embrace for a moment longer hoping to drag on this interaction because once you part away the last person to say goodbye to is Cregan.

But no matter how much you fight it, the inevitable is already upon you. There was no avoiding it.

“Farewell, Lord Stark,” you say softly as if you were no more than friends, you don’t even hide your tears even if they’re really for the lover you’re leaving behind and can’t kiss one last time, or tell him how much you love him.

“Thank you for letting me stay, for making Winterfell my home.”

Cregan clenches his fist to resist himself from comforting you, from kissing you, and forcing you to stay. He holds himself back even if it pains him.

“Farewell,” he puts in a simple word with that stern voice he uses when he’s amongst his people. “…Sweet Princess.”

He steps forward as he holds your gaze and reaches his hand out to ask for yours. You know what he wants and don’t hesitate to give him your gloveless hand.

When your warm flesh touches his, he carefully embraces your hand with his and then pulls it towards his lips to press a friendly kiss on your knuckles.

You shiver at the feeling of his wet lips but continue to hold his gaze as if nothing. You let your hand linger in his and push yourself to add more to your final farewell. “Write, I’ll be far but it doesn’t mean we still can’t maintain our friendship.” You smile and slowly pull your hand away to clasp it in front of you again.

“I will,” he assures you and then looks away for the first time since he’s walked you to your carriage to look back at one of the servants and give him a nod.

“I have something for you,” Cregan adds and meets your gaze again, piquing your curiosity. “A farewell present from me and Rickon.”

You slowly begin to grin and look at the servant who falls beside him and hands him a small wooden crate.

“I know how much you love these feline creatures so I want you to take one home,” he continues while motioning you closer with his eyes. When you’re a few inches away you look into the crate and see a small but chunky balled-up dark gray kitten.

“Oh,” you muse and open the crate to carefully take it out. “Hello, my beautiful friend.”

“It’s a piece of Winterfell to take with you,” Cregan interjects as he admires you comforting the kitten.

“Don’t worry, Astraea won’t eat you,” you assure the kitten. “You’ll be friends, won’t you, Wolf?” You give the gray kitten a name that reminds you of Cregan’s gray eyes. You then blink and look over at Cregan with a beaming grin. “Thank you, Lord Stark. I love the gift. I shall love it, cherish it, and always keep it safe.” You exhale deeply and let your handmaidens take the crate as you step back towards your carriage that will take you to the harbor.

“Farwell once again,” you keep longing the interaction as much as you can.

“Farewell, Princess,” Cregan says one more time using your birth name and your old family name while he also clenches his hands into fists again.

You hope he’ll keep interjecting with more but this time he doesn’t ask for your hand, he doesn’t hand you another present, this time it’s time to leave, thus, after one last lingering look you turn and walk to the carriage with tears forming in your eyes. Once you reach the steps, however, Cregan is there beside you, you meet his dark gray eyes for one last time and give him your hand again to let him cup it and help you up the two steps.

Before you can walk inside and close the door in front of him though, you linger there, you hold his comforting gaze even as Astraea lets out a soft cry in the distance. Neither of you want to pull away, but you have to, you have to leave, so you pull away first and walk in. You let the coach close the door before Cregan and minimize your view of his beautiful face.

The coach doesn’t take long to depart from that spot it was stationed at after that, he doesn’t know about your aching hearts, he doesn’t know to slow down so you could look at Cregan’s gray eyes and his pale face through the little gaps designed on the window for longer than a glimpse. The coach races out, making Cregan’s figure disappear before your very eyes, and letting you see snow, endless blankets of snow.

You want to cry badly, but you can’t, you don’t want to give anything away, so you hold onto your kitten, Wolf, and let Astraea express your hidden sadness with her melancholy song as she follows the carriage.

Now onto the stranger who was once your best friend, but who is still your betrothed, Aemond.

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Tagged- @namelesslosers @stargaryenx @chainsawsangel @lauftivy @winxschester @cloudroomblog @llarue @padsdarlg @sofietargaryen @gracielikegrapes @dreaming-of-the-reality @itzelpeyton @patdsinner33 @mrsdominickstark @elaena-aerrin @todoroki-slut @snh96 @urmomsgirlfriend1 @nifujiswhore @sweethoneyblossom1 @kaetastic @lightdragonrayne @squidscottjeans

[oscconfessions]

Hi guys! From this point forth, we will be removing ANY confessions deemed to be “low effort.” (The TL;DR is anything written in bold. I provided further in depth explanation to hopefully answer any potential questions if any section confuses you.)

What we will consider low effort:

>Anything less than a sentence, such as just stating just a character name or just a ship name.

>Confessions that contain a similar premise to another confession submitted in quick succession. Such as “Bot ii is my favorite character” followed shortly by “I love Bot ii”. That being said, confessions expressing the same viewpoint but proposing different ideas will NOT be considered the same confession. If a confession submitted after another echoes a similar opinion, mods may choose to screenshot or copy and paste the second confession and attach it to the original confession. (Note that this may only occur if the secondary confession is submitted off anon or uses an anon tag; any anonymous repetitive asks without any identification will simply be deleted.)

>General spam confessions will also be deleted, such as if the same user/anon submits the same ask over and over (such as “I love bot ii!” followed by “bot ii is so me!” followed by “bot ii yay” etc. or if they just spam the inbox with the same exact confession over and over.) If your post does not break the rules, it will eventually be posted. Be patient, please do not submit the same/similar confession every day thinking that will speed up the process.

>Non-confessions. Shitposts or images that are not confessions may be deleted. This depends more on the moderator queueing, but if the content is considered to be irrelevant it may be removed. Similarly, posts that are one sentence followed by a long and irrelevant copypasta that floods the feed may be deleted. We do still permit posts that may just be asking for recommendations/asking questions/etc. but we may become a bit stricter with what actually queues. If it’s a question that can be answered via a simple google search it may be considered spam.

>Finally, we encourage you to compile any similar thoughts into one confession. Rather than confessing “I love bot ii” and then submitting another confession stating “I love four bfdi”, you can combine these into one confession regarding favorite characters.

The definition of “low effort” varies from mod to mod, there is no concrete definition, however if your confession falls under one of the above categories it will more likely than not be deleted.

These rules will be implemented to help reduce spam and allow us to keep the ask box open more frequently, as the queue hopefully will not get as long! Unfortunately we can only post a maximum of 50 posts per day (with automatic queue), so once the queue exceeds high volumes (it’s at like 300 right now 😭) we get a really bad backup of confessions, and it takes even longer to have confessions post.

If you want to submit a confession, we do encourage you to refrain from submitting redundant asks (i.e., if you agree with a confession, commenting rather than submitting an entire confession in agreement or reiterating the posted ask is preferred.) We also encourage not submitting asks considered ‘popular opinions,’ or that are just repeating confirmed canon. This definition, of course, is different for everyone, and asks considered ‘popular opinions’ won’t always be removed, however reducing confessions that simply repeat a sentiment shared by pretty much everyone or that are just stating canon fact (such as ‘i hate proshippers’ or ‘two tpot is an algebralien.’) will allow more thought-provoking and interesting (or discourse-y) content a chance to be posted.

If you believe your confession falls under any of the above categories, it’s strongly preferred you do not submit it so that mods can focus more on queueing rather than deleting spam.

Thanks for your cooperation :]! If you have any questions, feel free to leave a comment!

also sorry for picking on bot for this entire post 💔

-📻

[boct-kimerakal]

just normal girl things

an offering. more signalis oc content. a tentative offering.. i’ve increased my discoverability a smidge but this may prove to be a terrible mistake and wind up revoked so! enjoy it while it lasts..

just kidding, it’s a massive lore dump too! what? you think you’re going to catch me off brand?

hallo, so if you’ve seen my introduction to pondwater post, you should know who these two are (if you haven’t, it should be in the tag) but TLDR: an LSTR unit walks into leng, the punchline? there’s another LSTR unit there already. they each have smidges of 512’s memory, pike (red) more than wasserjungfer (heavy combat frame)

this is a really bad doodle but it’s more so to preface the lore dump than anything! speaking of:

we’re focusing on pike this time. i figure she was manufactured before the penrose initiative and was used in a team, maybe on rotfront to survey the empire-era bioresonance-altered terrain for nation infrastructure expansion. kind of odd, i’m not sure yet - either way, her start easily conditions her into the shared unit identity. they named her ‘pike,’ so as to not be confused with another on-site LSTR! but left her to her own devices. as the unit ages, but is still operational, she’s shipped off to solo-man an isolated inspections / maintenance post. better than an ARAR, since it’s a military posting. she relishes the solitude, like a lighthouse keeper. simply an LSTR.

so it’s easy when 512 gets blended into her brain.

now, when she meets wasserjungfer, things change. as they fumble through sierpinski, with this imperfect mirror right beside her, she realises she’s nothing like wasserjungfer. or, rather, wasserjungfer doesn’t seem very much like an LSTR. (but also! so much like an LSTR! then why are they so little alike?) talking to wasserjungfer makes her separate herself more from her, then, more from 512. as she rejects the 512 elster neural pattern, things get weird - it comes and goes in waves.

all the while wasserjungfer yells at her to keep her grip on herself. pike. she can’t let her identity be erased in the wake of someone’s grief! she’s not 512! forget the nation, they aren’t just interchangeable. (ha! simple thoughts that’ll get you decommissioned, doesn’t matter now since they’re both doomed to die)

and yet, and yet, and yet..

pike has moments where she sees wasserjungfer and pukes oxidant. because she looks just like her (512) and if that LSTR’s here for ariane, then she can’t be 512. so what is she? what is standing here, bleeding? (pike, it’s your name, pike)

pike dreams of the “lighthouse” (an idea! not so much a real place) and an ocean she’s never seen, where all this identity stuff didn’t matter because she was The Only One There.

pike, becoming attached to her protege and her goals, this version of herself that stands a chance, has to convince herself she isn’t wasserjungfer (or, well, 4 to her since she refuses to tell her her name) too.

pike has to close her eyes to remember who she is based on what she is feeling in the exact moment because how else can she know? when everything she sees around her can’t be trusted? when 512 looked just like her? when her memories aren’t her own?

and on wasserjungfer’s side... her resolute “i won’t be changed, i have one goal” mentality! and how it turns against her.

as pike pushes away from 512’s identity, wasserjungfer, funnily enough, in all her ice-cold determination, gets pulled further into the thrall. having experienced a devotion enough to parallel 512’s - lian (who else but her lover, now) and ariane blend together in her head. the more she wants to get back to lian, the two kids they found - the deeper she sinks into being 512

eventually, that makes the environment.. take notice - there can’t be two 512s. so it targets the reject, pike. wounds don’t heal as easy, the corrupted hit harder. pike is pretty much playing on survival while wasserjungfer gets off easy. too busy - pike never once realises that wasserjungfer is breaking under the thrall. even when she finally succumbs to a corrupted horde, she saves wasserjungfer’s life, holding (gripping, really) onto a scrap of belief she can break the cycle. but at least she dies with a name! pike, and she dies realising pike lived.

though.. so desperately she craves dancing with someone she never met. whoops! sorry girl, thought you could die totally yourself? at least now she’s dead, she doesn’t have to keep fighting to keep herself her self. right?

i shake them around like little salt-and-pepper shakers. sprinkling insanity onto my breakfast. onto yours too if you read this. i’m workshopping them forever, they aren’t perfect ... not yet, maybe never .. but i like them a lot.

anyways, fun archive word dump! i’ll need this for later. probably should put the water-themed one on here too for safekeeping

[vodika-vibes]

We Could Be More pt III

Summary: Upon arriving on Takodana with Crosshair, you come to a distressing realization. A realization that, you fear, will change things forever.

Pairing: TBB Crosshair x F!Reader

Word Count: 1802

Warnings: None (Though this series is 18+ as a whole)

Tagging: @trixie2023 @n0vqni @yourusername1

A/N: So I now have no idea how long this series is going to be. Until I get tired of it, I guess.

Part 1 | Part 2 (smutty)

So far as you’re aware, the plan is for you and Crosshair to flee to Pabu, where his brothers and younger sister are hiding out from the Empire.

It’s a good plan. Reasonable. Succinct. 

However, the ship, newly named Signal, isn’t heading to Pabu. It’s heading to Takodana.

And you’re beginning to think that Crosshair is dragging his feet.

That maybe, just maybe, he doesn’t want to see his brothers.

You purse your lips, moving the hard candy from one side of your mouth to the other, as you ponder this thought. To be fair, he might be a little hesitant. After all, his brothers did defect from the Empire-

But then, so did you. And it was his idea.

You spin your seat so you’re looking at him, “Hey, Cross.”

He doesn’t look up from the Nav computer, “What?”

“Are you nervous about seeing your brothers again?” 

He pauses, and his gaze snaps up to your face. If you were anyone else you’d probably be a little worried about that look on his face, but you’re not anyone else. You’re you. And he’s Cross. 

And you’ve never been afraid of Cross.

“...No.”

“No?”

“No.”

“Because Takodana isn’t Pabu.” You point out.

“I’m aware.”

“And, you know, if you were a little hesitant about seeing your brothers again, I wouldn’t judge you.” You continue lightly.

Crosshair sighs, “Alright, enough.” He leans back in his seat, “Fine. Yes. I’m a little…uneasy about seeing my brothers again. But that’s not why we’re going to Takodana.”

“Yeah, yeah. I know. We have stuff we need to drop off, and you’re hoping for work from the owner. I remember.” You lean back in your seat, “And then what?”

“Hopefully, she’ll give us a few odd jobs so I can buy better armor.” Crosshair grouses.

“Aww, but I like your armor.”

“Yeah, I know.” He shoots you an amused look. “You’re hardly subtle, kitten.”

“Am so.”

You’re as subtle as a brick to the face.” Crosshair adds.

You pout at him, and open your mouth to say something, only for the alarm indicating that you’re about to fall out of hyperspace blares. You cancel the alarm, and focus your gaze back on the monitors in front of you.

The Signal falls out of hyperspace and Crosshair puts the ship into orbit while you shoot a message to landing control. 

“Pretty planet.” You note lightly, “What do you think?”

“Looks very green,” Cross replies, “You have the coordinates?”

“Yeah, just got them. Here.” You send them over to him, and you settle back as the ship starts moving down towards the planet's surface. 

Trusting that Cross isn’t going to crash the ship into the planet, you twist your chair to watch him work. It might be your favorite pastime.

You love the look on his face when he’s totally focused on something. You really love it when he focuses that look on you, but just seeing it at all makes you happy.

“You’re staring, kitten.”

“Can’t help it, you’re very handsome.”

“You never used to stare back when we were in the Empire.”

“Yeah, well, most of the time when you came to see me, I was working.” You shrug, “Does it bother you? Me staring?”

He glances at you out of the corner of his eye, even as he brings the ship to land, “No. I like having your eyes on me. It means they’re not on anyone else.”

You laugh in surprise, “Good to know. You think we should check in with Maz before bringing her the stuff?”

“More than likely. Good manners and all.” Crosshair stands and rolls his shoulders, “Stay with the ship, I won’t take long.”

“Alright.”

You watch as Crosshair steps off the ship and heads towards the castle, and you settle yourself just outside the doors, enjoying the sunlight and the cool breeze.

As you wait, you let your mind wander.

It’s been close to two months since you, and Crosshair, defected. And so far as you can tell, no one has noticed. And you have been paying attention to the alerts that come out of the Empire.

But the longer you go without being noticed, the more comfortable you get with thinking that maybe no one will notice that you defected.

That really is the best case scenario. 

You tilt your head back slightly. Actually, running from the government aside, you’ve really enjoyed the last two months. You’ve enjoyed spending this time with Crosshair.

You’ll admit, if only to yourself, that you were worried. Worried that your easy friendship would falter as you spent more and more time together. You’ve never been so happy to be wrong.

As it happens, you enjoy waking up next to him every morning. And you enjoy cooking with him, and joking with him, and just being with him. In fact, at this point, the idea of waking up and not seeing him makes your heart hurt.

The thought makes you pause. 

You love him. 

Of course, you knew that was a possibility. You knew that there was a chance that spending so much time with Crosshair would encourage you to fall for him, it was one of the reasons you were so hesitant about entering the friends with benefits situationship that you ultimately agreed to.

So the question is. What do you do about it?

Well, that’s easy isn’t it? Nothing. You say nothing. Why should anything change simply because you caught feelings?

No. It’s better to just leave things as they are.

After all, you might lose him if you tell him the truth.

“Welcome to my humble abode,” Maz Kanata says as she greets Crosshair, “You must be the one bringing the delivery from Corellia?”

“Yeah, that’s me.”

“Wonderful! Wonderful.” Maz scurries around the table, “And the young lady traveling with you?”

“...with the ship. Wasn’t sure this place was safe.”

“That is very understandable.” She nods, “But I assure you that neither you, nor your lady friend, will come to harm while my guests.”

“You don’t know us.”

“I know you both defected from the Empire.” Maz says, her gaze sharp, “I know that you’re both looking for someplace safe.”

“I don’t think safe exists in this galaxy…except maybe on our ship.” Crosshair replies as he folds his arms over his chest, “Where do you want the goods?”

“No need, no need. My droids will unload the cargo.” She gazes at him thoughtfully, “How would you feel about running some errands for me? If you agree, you and your lady will be my employees.”

“Depends on the job. She’d prefer if I didn’t have to kill anyone.”

Maz nods at him, “Understandable. I need you to make some deliveries to some old friends. I will provide you with new armor, so you won’t stand out so much.”

Crosshair frowns at her, “We are supposed to be heading somewhere.”

“And yet, I get the feeling that you’re not ready.”

“I…” He doesn’t have an answer for that, because she’s right. He’s not ready to come face to face with his brothers again. “Where would I have to go?” He asks instead.

“Naboo, Alderaan, Taris, Bespin, and Jedha.” Maz replies, “And then come back to complete payment.”

Crosshair thinks about it for a moment, and then he nods, “Alright.”

“Wonderful. I’ll have my droids bring the cargo to your ship. Now, come with me. I have your new armor.” Maz says, leading him through the throng of people and into her back room.

And fifteen minutes later, he’s stepping back onto the ship, “Cross-!” He turns to look at his Kitten, “Some droids just dropped off, like, 20 crates worth of stuff-”

“Yeah. I took a couple of jobs from Maz.” He admits.

He watches confusion flicker across her pretty face, before she grins, her entire face lighting up with amusement. “So. We’re avoiding Pabu for a bit longer then?”

“That a problem?”

“No. Just making sure.” Her pretty eyes drop down to his new armor, it’s black and dark blue with some orange, “This is new.”

“Maz insisted. I won’t stand out so much.” A small smirk crosses his face as her fingers glide across his new chestplate, “Like it?”

She hums as she traces the new paint with a delicate finger, “It suits you much more than the other one.” She finally says, before she looks up at him and favors him with a warm smile, “You look good, Cross.”

He slowly trails his fingers up her arm, and then up her neck, so he’s able to brush them across her painted lips. She really is so pretty. And so clever.

She deserved better than the Empire.

She deserves a better man than him.

Unfortunately, he’s not a good enough man to step aside and let anyone else have her.

He’s good enough to feel guilty about it though.

“I always look good,” He says with a small smirk, as he leans in and brushes his lips against hers.

She hums, and the smile she directs at him is warm and soft, and it’s like basking in the sunlight after a long rain storm. He’d burn the entire galaxy to the ground if it meant that her smile never fades.

“So,” She asks, “Where are we going?”

“Naboo, Alderaan, Taris, Bespin, and Jedha.” Crosshair lists off, his gaze still locked on her face.

“Well, that’s quite the list.” She beams at him and her eyes crinkle from her happiness, “I’ll go get Peabody and tell him the list.”

“Not just yet.” Crosshair murmurs, “Maz isn’t expecting us to leave right away.” He lowers his head and kisses her again, much more passionately, he feels her lightly grip the edges of his new armor, but before he can start tugging her clothes loose, his comm dings.

Crosshair pulls away and leans his forehead against hers, as she pulls his comm out of his pocket. She reads the message, pauses, reads it again, and then again, before her face twists in confusion. “Cross?”

“Yeah?”

“Did you join the Rebellion while you were talking to Maz?”

Crosshair pauses, “What?”

“You have a message from Saw Gurrera. I remember that he’s a leading member of the Rebellion.” She looks up at him, amusement glittering on her face, “Cross-”

He turns the comm so he can read it, and a low curse falls from his lips, “Well, I guess we did.”

Her head falls to his chest and she laughs, “You procrastinated us into the Rebellion,” She says through her giggles.

“Yeah, yeah. Come on, kitten. Let’s get out of here before Maz ends up making us cell leaders.” Though a small smile crosses his lips as she continues to giggle.

If this is what it’s like to love someone, he could get used to it.

[askuemki]

So I have no idea if I’ll keep this post up, but…

A little rant abt re8?? (And cod.. kinda) maybe venting (just a mess :,)

Disclaimer, take my opinions with a grain of salt I just wanna ramble lmao

Also spoilers, maybe (update, definitely)

So I’ve been having fun dipping my toes into Donna Beneviento (god her last name is hard to spell) content. After watching the gameplays and to at least have a basic understanding for the game, I find myself really drawn to her, maybe more than Alcina tbh

By no means i’m a diehard fan or anything, recently it’s been hard to find a new fandom to get attached towards. As much as I adore cod, there isnt really much to get attached too… like sure, task 141 is a fun group and the there is some GREAT art about the ships- but I only got attached because of Valeria, I won’t deny it at all. I’m a diehard lesbian, but there isn’t really much cannon content of her?? It’s really damn disappointing sometimes, man… same with Laswell. I appreciate all of the fanartists out there though, I adore all of the content here, fanfics or fan art. With Farah, she’s a diffrent story.. personally I never really got attached to her, but as a character she’s pretty neat. Her story sort of brings to light the horrors happening today which is a bit of a benefit…?? But ever since I found out things about both Valeria’s and Farah’s actors I’ve been a little off about things here and there. I don’t think I’ll stop posting Valeria content at all, it just might be a little less offen to indulge in different things.

Some personal things have been happening to make me feel really disconnected from like.. fucking everything for some reason?? Like I’m drifting away from fandoms, I’m drifting away from people and I’m like alone again.. I’m lost in a damn dumpster fire. AI art doesn’t help with this at all.. like why do I draw?? I’ve been drawing since I was in kindergarten like I never really thought of the specifics of perusing art, more or so just that I want to. Like hey, I wanna make a game or movie series, and something in me doesn’t realize I need to put in the effort to learn shit with just ends up in me doing nothing but self pitting on something I can change and ugh.. wish I can slap myself to get out of it.

So I think I’ve been kind of finding myself relating to Donna. Not in her extreme way, more or so just her aspect of being isolated, and just being known primarily for one thing. Like.. our side of art? Damn. Shit. I think I’m worth nothing.. and with Donna we don’t really know much about her besides her being a cursed Dollmaker, and the bare bones of her past. And we both barely fucking speak man… both hide our faces too !! maybe I kin this woman or something I don’t know

But as I was looking through her tumblr tag, I saw a rant about how headcannons and stuff has been stripping away the interesting stuff about the re8 villains… and with the things I’ve seen so far?? I can kinda agree, honestly.

Don’t get me wrong, if it’s not too.. insane? (I know those boundaries are hard to define at times, but maybe REALLY immoral shit for our “normal” world) and people aren’t forcing these headcannons into other people? I don’t mind headcannons. You do you, boo!

But the fan content I’ve seen, people reduce Donna and Alcina (I’m surprised it was pronounced as AlCHIna and not AlSIna, but side tangent over) from the potential they really have. Yeah it’s definitely nice to see Donna more, especially in those intimate moments.. but sometimes I feel like people just depict her as some shy, easily gullible, girl, and not really the mentally deprived woman she is. Like I’d love to see ideas of the different dolls Donna could create, or unique imagery of her mental state outside of having porcelain skin. What about the kinds of plants she takes care of? Or the dolls she makes? I’d love to see more of it, whether she has favorites, or if it’s a situation where she has doll replicas of her deceased family. Man, I really wanna see Donna do more creepy shit, basically.

With Alcina however? She’s kind of reduced to that (I’m going to cringe at these words so terribly, god help me) “hot vampire mommy”.. I’ll take fault for not looking into her content as much, I’m sure there’s great content out there !! (I’m not sure if anyone would do this but.. feel free to send me any fic recommendations or art) With what I want to see for her? I’ve heard from the rant post as a man-hating woman she had primarily female statues in her castle, it would be fun to see what else she has cause of this worldview, as well as more whitty remarks from her; I really enjoy her throwback with Heisenberg. Just in general.. her being a comical villain.

Okay so, the reason why I made this post in the first place before all of this shit threw up from my brain. Belladonna. At first, this ship really interested me, I like the character dynamics, the art was neat. But then something came up in my mind.. (as well as another rant post on the ship..) isn’t the Dimitrescu bloodline related with Donna? Both are failed experiments from Mother Miranda, and technically adopted by her. Though from what I know, Donna is the only one officially adopted. So would that be family..? I’ve seen a few places where Alcina called Donna her sister, and it makes me feel really off.

And I’ve seen in a few fanarts, Donna technically older than the Dimitrescu sisters posed next to them like another sibling??

I would like to endorse the ship, but just the morality of everything is off centered for me. I rather not support weird incest…

So please if people could maybe clarify for me whether it would technically be okay for support this ship.. I’d appreciate it. If it isn’t okay, I have plans on making a fan character anyways, or I can take current characters and make a resident evil au or something, and ship them when Donna. (I have a character that honestly looks like a mix of Alcina and Bela, but by no means she’s relates to the franchise, lmao)

By no means I’m experienced in resident evil lore or the fandom, this is just coming from a newer fan of the series, and what I’ve seen so far.

If you read all of this.. thank you?? I apologize if I sound ridiculous here, this is like the only place I can rant abt things without being brushed off for other shit

Good night now!!! I need to stop pushing my sleep boundaries ugh

[wannab-urs]

Appropriate Reactions

Summary: Ezra is stranded without a ship and has nothing to offer you in return for a ride off The Green... So you make a deal.

WC: 1.6k

Content/Warnings: Butt stuff :) oh and just like... warning for the way Ezra talks. Excessive use of lines from the movie.

I am excited to present the next installment of the Peg that Middle Aged Man Campaign 2023. My dear friends @atinylittlepain (who made the graphic!), @beskarandblasters, @serenaxpedro, @jksprincess10, @cutesyscreenname and I are all writing a series of pegging fics for you lovely freaks. And we all have at least one out already! We'll be posting a masterlist next week, but for now, you can find them under the tag #peg that middle aged man campaign 2023.

Thanks to @str84pedro for the edit/commentary <3

Ezra Masterlist | Main Masterlist | AO3 | Kofi

The Green is a terrifying place to mine for Aurelac, being one of the rougher and less regulated prospecting destinations. As such, you don’t make a habit of talking to strangers here. Get in, get the shit, get out. That’s how you’ve always done it. 

This time is different though. This time you found a man sitting on a log, helmet-covered head pressed into his hands. You tried to retreat quietly, hoping he wouldn’t notice you. It’s never a good idea to get caught out here alone. People got desperate. 

Before you could safely make it back into the cover of the forest, the man looked up and locked eyes with you. You pulled your thrower on him, taking several steps back. The man threw his hands in the air and said, “Easy there, stranger. I do not intend to cause you any harm.” 

He spoke with an odd cadence, some fringe-planet accent coloring his dialogue. It was oddly disarming, causing you to drop your weapon a tad. 

“And why would I believe you?” 

“I happen to be without a ship and therefore have no reason to dispossess you of your trophy case,” the man shot back, hands still above his head. 

This shocked you, as being without a ship on The Green pretty much guaranteed you were not long for this world. His air filter would give out sooner or later and the dust would choke him to death. You may be tough, maybe even cold, but you’re not evil. You couldn’t leave him there. 

You holstered your thrower and took a few steps toward the man. “I can give you a lift, but I won’t do it for free. What can you offer me?” 

The man had slowly lowered his hands to gesture at himself. “Your offer is indeed generous, and I would be more than happy to sign and seal save for one glaring slip… I have naught to my name but this suit and my body.”

You considered him for a moment. It was a little hard to get a good look under the bubble of his helmet, but from what you could see, he was handsome. He had dark hair and golden skin. A mustache framed his plush lips and a scruffy beard covered his jaw. His nose was prominent and curved, which you’ve always liked on a man. Fuck it, he’s hot. “Your body will do.”

He had shrugged and stood up, striding over to shake your hand. “Name’s Ezra.” 

On the walk back to your ship, you’d introduced yourself and asked for the story of how he came to be without a ship on this gods forsaken moon. It was a sorry tale and made you more than a little wary about his motivations, but he was so damn charming you couldn’t help but trust him. 

Now, sitting in the captain’s chair of your ship and taking in the sight of Ezra out of his suit, you’re glad you decided to trust him. The man is gorgeous, sitting sprawled out against the wall. He’s all broad shoulders and thick thighs wrapped in a black and tan flight suit. His close cropped hair has a little blonde patch at the front and his eyes are a deep chocolate brown. 

“Would I be too forward in asking how you intend to proceed, little bird?” Ezra drawls. 

“Not at all. How experienced are you, exactly?” You doubt very much that he’s a blushing virgin, based on looks and age alone. 

“I myself have frequently indulged, and I have not often found regret,” he throws a wink at you, the corner of his mouth quirking into a self-satisfied smirk. He knows he’s hot, damn him. But you intend to throw him for a loop. 

“I’m not sure you’ve indulged in this particular technique… If you want a ride on my ship, you’ll have to let me take you, pretty boy,” you stare him down, smugness settling into your features as you take in his shocked expression.

 “I… um. I have not had that particular pleasure… you do not appear to have an apparatus with which to accomplish the task at hand.” He gestures at you, clearly wondering if you’re hiding a dick under your flight suit. 

“I’m full of surprises.” You stand and make your way to a small wardrobe by your bed, digging around in your stash to find what you’re looking for. You shut the door, triumphantly holding your strap out for Ezra. 

The harness is made from a similar material to your flight suit. Already slotted into the ring is a long flesh colored phallus made from a soft but firm material mined on your home planet. 

“Now this is somethin’ I have never seen… in all my time in The Green.” Ezra looks fascinated by your contraption, not a hint of nervousness in his big brown eyes. 

“So what’ll it be, Ez? Deal or no deal?”  

---

Ezra is truly beautiful. His golden skin shimmers with sweat as you pump two fingers in and out of him, lightly stroking his pretty cock. He’s laid back on your bed, thighs spread to accommodate you, a pillow under his hips to grant you easier access. “Feel good, babe?” 

“Kinda nice… tingly,” Ezra chokes out, throwing his head back onto the bed dramatically. He’s extremely vocal, talking himself through the new sensation and whimpering when you curl your fingers into the sensitive spot inside him. 

You lower your head and gently suck the tip of his cock into your mouth, skimming your lips over the smooth skin and taking in the earthy taste of his precum. Ezra whines and jerks his hips, trying to push himself deeper in your mouth, but you follow the motion. You just know his begging will be glorious and you’re determined to draw it out of him. 

You dip your tongue into his slit at the same time you add a finger inside him. Ezra’s whole body goes taut for a moment, his head snapping up off the bed, before he relaxes into your touch. “You’re so responsive, Ez. Good boy.” 

“I greatly… appreciate the compliment… little bird.” Ezra grits through his teeth. “I would also greatly…” he breaks off with a moan as you press the pads of your fingers into his prostate again. “... appreciate getting… a move on.” 

You decide you’ve teased him enough for now, sitting back on your heels and slicking up your fake cock. You grip the backs of Ezra’s thighs and push his legs toward his chest, admiring the way he’s so pliant for you. You settle the tip against his hole and push in just a bit. “Good?”

“No harm done yet,” Ezra says breathlessly. You rub your hands up and down his thighs soothingly and push in slowly. Ezra sucks in a breath and blows it out quickly a few times and you giggle at him. 

“Ezra, sweetheart, you alright?” 

He shifts his hips, seating himself fully on your toy with a slightly pained groan. “You don’t have to be so gentle with me, little bird. I will not shatter.” 

You take this as your cue to fuck him stupid. You wonder if you can render him speechless. Leaning forward slightly and readjusting your grip on his thighs, you pull out of him and thrust back in to the hilt twice. 

“Slow… slow down a beat there, little bird.” Ezra’s hands flutter over his own chest and up into his hair, like he doesn’t know where to settle them. 

You slowly circle your hips, rubbing against the spot inside him you know will get him back on board. Ezra tugs at his own hair and babbles a string of praise at the sensation. “There ya go baby. I’m gonna make you feel good, okay?”

You lean forward, planting your hands on either side of his head and slot your thighs under his. You thrust slowly in and out of him, drawing a circle with your hips each time. His body chases your movements like he doesn’t want you to pull away at all, hands sliding up around your waist and pulling you into him. 

“Fuck, little bird, you are a miracle.” He gazes up at you in awe, as if you just told him you know where the Queen’s Lair is and you’re going to take him there. His lips part and his head digs into the sheets as he arches his hips up to you. You reach between your bodies, wrapping your fingers around his length and begin stroking him in time with your thrusts. 

“Are you going to come for me, pretty boy?” You whisper before sucking his earlobe into your mouth. He whimpers and arches further into your body, hips shifting to meet every thrust.

“Please! Don’t stop birdie, I’m near- nearing my rel- release.” You stifle a giggle at his phrasing and speed up your hand on his cock. You feel his body jerking beneath you and pull back to watch his face as he cums. 

His eyes are shut tight, brow pinched in the middle, and little moans and whimpers fall from his parted lips. You lean forward and suck his plush bottom lip between your teeth, grazing it lightly before kissing him fully. 

You feel the hot spurts of his cum cover your fingers as he breaks the kiss, throwing his head back and groaning deep and loud. His fingertips dig into the flesh of your back, pulling you down on top of him. 

He lays there, panting into your shoulder for a minute before he turns his head and whispers in your ear. 

“Actions like these foment the threat of appropriate reactions.”

----

[i-hate-skelatons]

I'm going to respond to a TikTok (only the serious points) about their opinion on the webtoonNevermore ship "Morellada"

I personally believe that this ship goes against a redemption arc from Ada. But otherwise it could be a great character moment. But this person believes that they could help each other but i disagree. I'm going to be as kind as I can despite my anger and try not to seem like an asshole.

0. Only one of these actually point to it being canon and not just why you like the ship

2. Ada has been shown to be codependent and obsessive of relationships. Relationships become her whole personality. She acts like the person she wants to/ is dating for the sake of love. What do you think could help someone who craves a relationship to an unhealthy amount and acts like a different person so someone could like them? A RELATIONSHIP WITH SOMEONE WHO ACTS COMPLETELY DIFFERENT THEN THEM!!! She won’t ever achieve self love if she’s not herself

5. I don’t believe the creator would do fan service for no reason

6. Having a dynamic doesn’t equal it being good character writing

7. Her sexual identity could be an interesting topic to discuss but if you’re only wanting it for the sake of kining then it wouldn’t be executed well 

8. I honestly agree (somewhat). This could be an interesting idea for a story in a vacuum like a fan fiction. But this doesn’t meaningfully connect to Ada’s character arc or the story as a whole. If the story was meant to be about their relationship maybe but this again is not about that so it would just be a weird distraction that doesn’t fit.

11. This isn’t a03. It’s a story not a collection of tags you find interesting

12. She did that cuz it’s their teammate… isn’t that what she said? To not kill a teammate?

13. What a big romantic moment! Now what happened afterwards?

16. Refer to number 2

17. Refer to number 5

22. This is probably my weakest argument. But it’s a popular tag that involves 2 fan favorites. Why wouldn’t they use a tag for fans of said 2 characters? And ship names can be used for Platonic relationships (not much tho) I’m not confident in this.

25. First of all. In what world is she bold and confident? She barked for a man. And morella is more bold and confident. You just talked about how she stood up against the Italian bitch. And she stood up to Ada. And then again refer to number 2

26. I haven’t seen that at all but even if so that’s a pretty week argument

[findroleplay]

Rules: do’s & don’ts

There is almost no rule for what is or isn't allowed on this blog, we are accepting of basically all and any content. When something is not allowed there is a good reason for it, so please try not to break the rules.

What you can not post

Anything too explicit. Detailed NSFW starters, graphic GIFs or pictures used as decoration and the like. If you really want to share a detailed vision of the scene that will be acted out in the roleplay, send a link to google docs, carrd, another post, etc that people can check out. This is primarily about smut but it applies to gore as well. To be super clear, smut and gore are not banned from the blog, you can request any kink/situation you like, but you will need to discuss the details with your partners. For example, asking for a BDSM roleplay is fine, writing out details of the smut scene in your request is not. This is to avoid possible reports based on the NSFW ban.

Wait 24 hours before submitting again from the moment the ask is posted. You can post ads requesting different RPs, just not the same ask. This is to avoid cluttering.

It goes without saying, this is RP only. You can't send requests for dating or similar.

You can only send ads through asks or submissions. If you need help with those I'll be happy to lend a hand, but don't send your requests via DMs. If the inbox is closed it means it's full/I'm not active, please be patient and, again, don't try to get your ad in through DMs. I won't be able to post your ad from DMs.

That's it, pretty easy, right?

What you can post

Generally, anything not mentioned above is allowed. However, since some things get asked often, I will make a general list of things that are allowed for your convenience.

RPF is allowed. 

Discord servers and other groups are allowed. 

Things related to RPing, even if not strictly roleplay-seeking, are allowed. Other roleplay finders, RP resources, and even questions about roleplaying are all allowed. 

Minors are allowed. 

Dead dove content is allowed.

What you should/shouldn't do

Your ask will be published even if you don't abide by these rules. However, keeping this in mind will make for a better experience for everyone involved.

Be as clear as possible about the fandom and other relevant information. I can't tag it if you don't tell me where these blorbos come from. If the fandom has alternate names/acronyms include everything!

If you're going to include more than 20 fandoms in your search, split the post into two separate requests. There's a maximum of 30 tags allowed on a post, out of which only the first 20 will show up in searches. If you include more, the rest will go untagged/will not show up in searches.

Don't censor triggers. It just interferes with people that have these words blocked. Don't write inc*st, write incest.

Miscellaneous other stuff

I am not the police, your parents, or HR. If you have a disagreement with your RP buddy I can't intervene to solve it for you, nor can I put them in time out. Unpleasant things happen online, learn to block and move on. Please don't message me - or worse, send anon asks - with callouts for certain users and ask them to block/warn others.

If you feel stuck and the blank page is daunting, you can use this form as a base. Feel free to fill out everything, just some of it, add items I didn't include, or just send your own personal ad.

Literacy:

Fandom:

Pair: (fxf, mxf, mxm, ccxcc, ocxoc)

Character(s):

Ship(s):

Triggers:

Genres:

Plot ideas:

Where: (discord, Tumblr, reblogs..)

Other:

[hufflepuffwritingstuff2]

For the mermaid ask can you do 1+6+8 you write really cool stuff 💕

Hi Ha-Ha Whump! Thanks so much for the kind words! Sure I can write this for you! Thanks for requesting this, here you go! P.S. I know mermay is long over but hey, it's still summer over here! And mermaids are relevant all year long in my opinion! Thanks for your patience while I got around to this!

From this ask game

The waves lapped at the shoreline like a mother pulling a blanket up to her child’s chin. The sun was just beginning to peek over the horizon, painting the sky with a pink and orange hue. Bits of wood and metal littered the beach, coated in salt and sand.

Caretaker picked their way through the wreckage, looking for any survivors. They had the lighthouse beacon on all night, but some poor ship had managed to get dashed on the rocks all the same. Upon seeing the ripped, black flag with the skull and crossbones amongst the driftwood, Caretaker realized that this might not have been a bad thing.

A splash made Caretaker whip their head around. Something was writhing in the sunken ship’s net. A pirate? A pirate’s prisoner? Regardless, they were a survivor, and Caretaker hoped to keep it that way. They rushed over to the spot, untangling the person trapped inside. They were so entangled that only their upper half was remotely visible.

They looked up at Caretaker with fearful eyes. Their long hair clung to their face and torso, dirtied with sand. Red welts littered their pale body. A pirate’s prisoner then.

“It’s alright,” Caretaker said, “you’re lucky to be alive. I’m going to take care of you, okay?”

The person didn’t speak, just gave a tiny nod. Caretaker started working on their lower half, and gasped when the net fell away to reveal a shimmering fish’s tail.

So more than a pirate’s prisoner- a pirate’s trophy, a pirate’s pet; a captured mer. Now that Caretaker took a closer look, those freckles on the person’s face looked more like little blue scales. Those scars on their neck? Gills. And hidden behind their curtain of hair were webbed ears.

“Are you going to hurt me?” The mer asked as if they knew the answer already.

“Wha- no, of course not,” Caretaker said, eliciting a look of surprise from the mer, “I said I was going to take care of you.”

Now that the creature was free, Caretaker could get a better look at their lower half. Their tail was littered with cuts and was missing scales in various patches. There was no way they’d be able to swim with it. It was decided then.

“My name is Caretaker,” they started slowly, “I’m going to pick you up now if that’s okay.”

“P-please don’t,” the mer said, shrinking back.

“But you’ll die if I leave you out here on your own,” Caretaker reasoned, “I promise I won’t hurt you, I just want to help.”

The mer thought it over for a long moment. They looked up at Caretaker and nodded. Caretaker smiled in a way they hoped was calming. They scooped the mer up in a bridal carry.

“..umpee,” the mer mumbled.

“Hm? What was that?”

“Whumpee,” the mer repeated, a little more audibly, “my name is Whumpee.”

“It’s nice to meet you, Whumpee,” Caretaker said, “I’m gonna get you all fixed up, okay?”

Caretaker began the walk from the beach to their lighthouse near the cliffs. They had no idea how to take care of a mer, but darn it, they were going to try.

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@electrons2006

[leventart-den]

I'm here with another silly idea for ZoSan, dear Strawhearts. And you know what? I love cliches. Because for me it is always so much fun to take something that is very well-known and predictable and think how it can be turned around and changed. So, of course, when I see the "f*ck or die" tag on AO3, my brain immediately starts to work and think what I can do with it. I'm writing this in a very subdued and non-descriptive manner (because I'm just sharing a general idea), but I think you can fill in the blanks given the topic.

So what if this happened and during another battle with an enemy ship, Sanji was somehow drugged.

And now this is a ten times worse version of Sanji, and not only regarding girls. And since it's ZoSan, of course Zoro is the one who finds Sanji in the kitchen and notices that something is wrong with the shitty cook. They fight as usual, but in the end it ends with Sanji admitting that he needs help. He tells Zoro that he trusts him, that he is strong enough to watch over him and not let him out of the kitchen so that Sanji doesn't do things to others that he will later regret. 

So now they're stuck in the kitchen alone with Zoro shooing everyone away from the door who comes to find out what's going on. Although later they still had to move down to another cabin because Luffy couldn’t live without food and was ready to break inside. Sanji, in turn, is holding up adequately for now, but over time things are getting worse. Zoro can tell that the cook is burning like a furnace even sitting a few steps away from him.

Over time, Zoro begins to talk to Sanji to distract him. Somehow they manage to talk to each other without the usual fighting and insults. This is probably because Sanji is too out of it and just doesn't have the strength. And Zoro, despite the impression of an idiot that he sometimes creates, is actually very smart and attentive and senses the situation enough to react adequately. Because you can't be the best swordsman if you can't read your enemies and people in general as a consequence. And Sanji is not just a crew member, he has always been his rival. Zoro is able to read Sanji better than anyone to this point. So he understands when "it's not the right time". 

Although, as a few more hours pass, everything begins to slide even further down the slope. Zoro begins to think that the shitty cook has bitten more than he can chew. And if Zoro is completely frank, he himself has been having “strange” thoughts for some time now, which he stubbornly refuses to name. He suggests turning to Chopper for medical help, but Sanji categorically refuses. Chopper is too young and there is no way in hell that Sanji would allow him to be exposed to “such things in life” even as a doctor.

More time passes and when at some point Sanji stops responding to Zoro and he realizes that Curly blacked out Zoro thinks that he had enough.

He manages to bring Sanji back to consciousness and angrily (because he’s worried, although he won’t admit it) says that the cook is an idiot and instead of being stubborn and enduring and possibly dying, Zoro could help him. They could solve this problem. And in general it’s not even a problem, there’s nothing “special” about it, they’ll just forget about it after that and that’s it. However, despite his clouded consciousness, Sanji watched him very carefully and maybe he would have believed Zoro that “there is nothing special about this” if he had not been red as a tomato and his hands had not trembled so much, despite how tightly they were squeezing the collar of his shirt. 

So after a moment of silence, he carefully removed Zoro's hands, never taking his eyes off Zoro.

"Marimo. If you want to help me, help me. Stay with me. Make sure I don't do anything stupid. Restart my heart if it stops. Help me breathe if I can't anymore. But don't fucking ever offer me this solution again. That won't happen, not in circumstances like these. Not under pressure. I don't want to hear this. I'd rather fucking die than let anything control me and influence my actions. I am my own man, this is my body and only I can decide what and how."

There was something left unsaid. Something Zoro doesn't know yet about the cook's past. But he understands that it is important enough not to try to propose this solution anymore.

Silence fell after that, interrupted only by Sanji's heavy breathing and muffled wheezes of pain. Each of them with their own thoughts. Curly is strong, Zoro knows he will get through, but despite this, for some reason it’s hard to hear his pain. Zoro's hand twitches to reach out to him and somehow bring comfort. But he doesn't do that, he just sits next to him.

It becomes dark, night falls over the sea and a sudden thought comes to Zoro.

“You said that you don’t want it to happen under such circumstances.. Does that mean that under different..”

"Shut up shitty Marimo."

"..you would make out with me?"

Zoro doesn't see Sanji's face, he doesn't answer. But the silence is so loud that Zoro begins to think that he is about to suffocate. He wasn't prepared for how hard it would hit him.

They don't speak after that. It's deep into the night when Zoro hears that Sanji's breathing has become measured, he seems to have fallen asleep. The drug has worn off. Zoro sighs, feeling suddenly very tired and as if sobered up. This is an unpleasant and strange feeling. It was as if it suddenly became colder. He feels nervous and angry. And the worst thing is he understands why.

He is afraid of losing what he doesn't have. What he didn't know he needed. Something he didn't notice.

Sanji shifts in his sleep and Zoro feels a growl forming in his throat.

He doesn't sleep that night.

He guards.

[grossrottie]

If you’re still into warriors cats would you mind sparing some nsfw bramblefire headcanons

Helloooooo!! I am still in my warriors brainrot!! (Also I didn’t realize until pasting this big ramble here that you asked for NSFW headcanons specifically oOP!! I’ll add those after my rambles!!)

I’ve been struggling to find a way to tag my warriors stuff for my own organization, while also not using the main tag. So I’ve just cut down on posting WC by accident while I try to figure it out ajdhhshrhrb

OKAY SO. BRAMBLEFIRE.

Y’know, believe it or not, I don’t have many thoughts about this one! I’ve seen some posts and I may have even reblogged an artwork or two, but I’ve never found that it really grabs me. It’s cool, but it’s sort of in that tier in my mind that HawkBramble is. It’s nice but it isn’t my usual go-to.

Now, that being said, let’s see if I can get any thoughts going about these two! I like trying to make up ideas even if it’s a ship I don’t usually go for.

This ship has a lot of potential and a lot of ways it can be taken!!

I’m a big fan of the “age-gap ship but the younger one is the pursuer” trope, however I feel like it might not fit here. Not exactly, at least.

My initial thought was of 1) the wariness that Fireheart/star feels towards Bramble as he’s growing up and 2) the desire of Bramble to be accepted, to be loved, to not be feared. To be seen as himself, not as his father’s heir. Not as the kin of the leader-slaughtering, coup-planning beast that was/is Tigerstar.

Bramblepaw/claw is without a father, and even his sister is no longer part of his clan anymore. (I can’t quite recall Tawnypelt’s age when she moved clans tbh, so take this with a grain of salt). Cats fear him. They see his father in his eyes even as he wants so badly to divorce himself from Tigerstar’s influence.

Meanwhile Fireheart/star is wary (my god man, I gotta make a chart so I can figure out what point of time has which cats in each clan, and who is apprenticed vs warriored).

I could totally imagine a few situations, but one of them would definitely be young Bramblepaw/claw desperately seeking out approval. He wants to be liked. He wants to be accepted. Maybe he tries to spend extra time with Firestar. Maybe he tries to catch his attention. Maybe he tries to do the opposite of what Tigerstar had done, to try to distance himself from his father.

I’m not sure who would develop a crush first, tbh.

If it was Firestar: perhaps he always had an admiration for the thick fur and the muscular form that Tigerclaw/star had been blessed with. However due to Tigerclaw’s clear evilness, it never went beyond a vague admiration from the ginger tom. Firestar sees Tigerclaw reflected in Brambleclaw, but there’s also an edge of kindness to Brambleclaw’s actions. He may be clumsy, a bit temperamental, oversensitive to comments about his family, and stubborn, but he also has an endearing factor to him. Maybe Firestar even sees himself in Brambleclaw. A cat who is uneasy and uncomfortable with the roles and titles thrust upon him, who only wants to live in his truth and exist in a place where he belongs. I imagine that Firestar would admire Bramble from afar if he developed a crush. Maybe he’d even distance himself from his apprentice (depending on the ages they are when Fire realizes his own interest in Bramble), not wanting to influence him or act wrongly. I don’t think Brambleclaw would take well to that, though. He’d likely want to know *why*. What did he do wrong? Why is Firestar suddenly so distant? Why won’t he come near Bramble? Why does he suddenly act skittish and uncomfortable when he’s training Bramble? Bramble wants to know and he will do anything he can to figure it out. (And there *is* a risk if he doesn’t figure it out. A risk by the name of ‘Tigerstar’, the cat who will absolutely come into Bramble’s life and take control if he doesn’t have an older role model to look towards for support.)

If it was Bramblepaw/claw: Hmmmm! I’m not sure!! I wonder if he would even realize it was a crush at first. Maybe he thinks it’s competition, or some sort of innate link with Firestar due to the hatred that Bramble’s father felt towards Fire. Maybe he tries to avoid that feeling, because he fears that it’s Tigerstar’s influence that causes that interest!

Firestar has shown a considerable amount of wariness to Bramblepaw in the books due to that same link to Tigerstar. Perhaps he sees Bramblepaw avoiding him and acting odd, so he takes Bramble out for a walk to have a talk. Firestar thinks he’s going to have a serious talk about Bramble’s father’s and his loyalties, or whether Bramble wants to be a Thunderclan cat at all. But Bramblepaw instead explains his interest in Firestar. Firestar is very familiar with the feelings that Bramble is describing and he realizes that Bramble has a crush on him. Still, part of him is unsure whether it might be a trick, a silly childish crush, or perhaps Tigerstar’s influence somehow.

I’m not really sure! I could think of a few routes but I’m not sure what would be most accurate to the characters themselves. Hmmmmm.

Either way, I feel like Fireheart/star would have to grow and learn not to see Tigerstar when he looks at Bramble. That was already a plotline in the books but it’s definitely more prominent if we’re going the BrambleFire ship route, since the closer relationship could be damaged much more intensely by those brief flashes of distrust and recognition in Firestar’s eyes.

So to round out this rambling (which I hope made some sort of sense akdhrbehrhrj) I think Brambleclaw would really have a thing for being praised and appreciated! He’s always been in the shadow of his dead father and the sins that Tigerstar committed, it means a *lot* to him when someone appreciates and loves him for who he is.

Meanwhile, Firestar strikes me as the type to make his appreciation known, *especially* once he realizes how much it means to Bramble.

I think a sign that they’ve grown and developed together, would be when Firestar listens, understands, and helps Brambleclaw through his moments of anger and rage without any distrust or wariness. When Firestar sees Brambleclaw angry and thinks “What happened, is he okay?” instead of “He’s just like his father”, that would be a sign that they’ve reached a point of understanding and trust between them.

ALSO NOW ONTO THE NSFW STUFF BC I CANT BELIEVE I MISSED THAT PART OF THE ASK OH MY GOD 😭😭😭

Okay sO Brambleclaw absolutely has a praise kink. Maybe a daddy kink too. He’s also the type to not know how to accept praise sometimes too, imo!! Depending on how hard the praise hits, he might devolve into chuckles and giggles and coughing as he tries to think of something to say. He also loves being named, I think! Both pet names, as well as his own name. He wants to know that he’s seen as *him*, not as his father’s kin. He wants to be Brambleclaw.

Meanwhile Fireheart/star is definitely willing to give that praise. It may take a while, but eventually Firestar would indulge Brambleclaw with the sweetest cooing and adoration and kind loving words of praise and admiration.

I also feel like Brambleclaw might have a thing for being de-ranked, if that makes sense! He obviously likes his warrior rank and the respect he’s earned, but I feel like he’d really like those occasional moments when he can strip that away and be Bramblepaw. Needing instruction, needing guidance, and needing a warm ginger tom to look up to. However it might take a while to admit that to himself and accept that it isn’t a shortcoming to sometimes want to be protected.

Brambleclaw also seems the type to like worshipping, both giving and receiving! He likes to make his partner know that they’re the most important cat in the world to him. He likes to dote on them and indulge them as if they’re the stars themselves. Firestar also enjoys this!!!

Maybe there’s even a bit of kittypet play, or power swap if it’s a switchy relationship! They’d definitely leave camp to do that though; they wouldn’t want anyone walking in on Firestar bent down, pretending to be a clueless kittypet while Brambleclaw pretends to be an intimidating warrior or rogue who is creeping up on a new victim.

(Neither of them are aware of the similarities to that one instance with Tiny and Bramble’s father, if that does end up happening between Fire and Bramble.)

Oooh! Maybe one or both of them have impregnation or breeding kinks. Or maybe feminization? The options are absolutely endless!

Me at the start of this ask: eh, I don’t have many thoughts

Me looking back at this post: oh, that’s a lot of words. I guess I did!

[amerricanartwork]

Y’know, I have a funny story with the ship between Innocence and Pebbles.

@eggobuggo , my sister, was playing The Sims and made the iterators in her own humanised forms, including her version of Innocence and Wind, along with Moon, Pebbles, NSH and Suns, all with their own personalities and stuff. She set up a generic apartment, put the gang in, and just had fun making them do silly shenanigans together, while I sit and watched her play.

In particular, we headcanon NSH, Pebbles and Innocence as Gen 3s, the newer modes, and so she made them into teenagers, which, with a DLC, have a whole new host of features that are not in the base game. This includes getting crushes (which weirdly enough, young adults and adults cannot get).

But anyway, one day, later into the game (the gang basically all were in the high end of the friendship scale with each other), the notif board popped up that Innocence had gotten a crush on Pebbles. Unfortunately for her, NSH and Pebs were already being all flirty with each other (Ragequit is where it’s at for us), making Pebble basically keep her in the friendzone. Ngl, my heart went out to her :,) Especially so, because they were all sharing a room. (space was tight)

After that, I began thinking about it in context of it in-universe, and ngl, I came to quite liking it as a ship, especially since I see Innocence to be less… asshole-ish (?), I guess, than what the general fandom makes her out to be (I mean it’s understandable, we only see her to leak the pic of Pebbles condition and that’s it.). To me and Eggo, she’s much nicer unless you really piss her off, which then, her more cynical and gossipy side of her comes out. She was actually more of on the friends side with Pebble before the shit went down.

At the time, I thought “dang, it’s a shame I won’t be seeing anything of it since she’s so obscure.”. This was a couple months before I began seeing art of them on the main tag.

Soooo… I guess I’m somewhat of an og Milkshake (as is the fandom name) shipper???

Just, seeing you and others make art about them is almost surreal in a way, since the only reason I really considered them as a ship was cuz of a random event in a life sim game lol.

Also @eggobuggo, I hope you don’t mind me sharing the story. :)

Wow, that seems like quite the story! And I do agree, after witnessing something like that in a totally different game it must be pretty surreal to see the ship gaining popularity in the actual RW fandom now too! It's nice to get another seal of approval from an original Milkshake shipper!

For me, it's also a bit strange because it's something I've considered for a really long time as a lingering "oh, wouldn't it be cool if I could make this work?" idea. The obscurity and lack of content for UI to draw inspiration from, both canon and fanon, definitely added to these feelings and the difficulty of imagining a working portrayal of the ship, hence I've only recently felt confident enough about the relationship and UI as a character to act on it. So after Pura coined the ship name and made a lot more art of it, then other artists started expressing approval and even drawing it themselves, it almost feels like I'm watching the ship enter the mainstream (Tumblr) fandom consciousness in real time, which is honestly pretty cool, especially since it feels like I had a hand in it with that initial ask! And even if I wasn't the very first to consider it, I'll definitely continue supporting this ship!

For some other thoughts though, I totally agree on Innocence not being mean in reality, though for me she's not mean or gossipy at all and more so has a kind-of opposite major flaw that tends to cause bad things unintentionally. As much as I can understand interpreting the character as a genuinely mean person, I thought it'd be interesting to imagine that her leaking the rot simply caused others to perceive her as mean, not that she's that way in reality. After all, I don't think we ever see direct dialogue from Innocence in canon, and the only evidence I can find of her being mean is Wind's speculation on her motivations. I also took inspiration from @shkika's Innocence, but I just wanted to see if I could take those ideas further to create my own unique interpretation.

Also, it's actually pretty coincidental you're telling me this too, because in regards to what I've come up for my Milkshake portrayal, Innocence having an unrequited crush on Pebbles for a really long time is actually really important for both plot and character arc reasons! I've been developing my own take on the classic worm-off-the-string iterator AU idea with @hail-strom for like the past week or so and the ship as of now plays a decent role in that, but the unrequited crush acts as subtle, yet major context for Innocence's actions throughout, which in turn slowly influence Pebbles especially as he starts to reciprocate those feelings (much to his alarm)!

Anyway, thanks for sharing that with me, and thanks for giving me a chance to ramble about this ship more! I'm honestly so happy to see it growing, and all support counts!

[vodika-vibes]

Hi! I was wondering if you could write a fic about CX-2, because he needs some love and maybe a reader or S/O could rescue him from tantiss and take care of him and feed him good food and make sure he’s happy and healing

Idk if he is tech or dogma or anyone we’ve met before cause nameless clones deserve so much love and idk why I feel lowkey emotional, but it made me so sad when he got turned into a kebab, after all the torture and stuff he went through, I just wanted to hug him

Anyways, I hope you have a wonderful day!

In The End

Summary:  It’s been a year, 12 long months, since the last time that you saw CX-2. You went on a date with him, and then he vanished, with only a simple message saying that he had to work and that he’d contact you when he could. And then he fell off the face of the map. And now, almost a year later, and with the able assistance of a group of Wookie Mercenaries, he’s back with you, safely on your ship headed for the haven you’ve arranged beforehand.

Pairing: CX-2 x F!Reader

Word Count: 1359

Warnings: None

Tagging: @trixie2023 @n0vqni @imabeautifulbutterfly

A/N: So as much as I love Tech and Dogma, I love the idea more that CX-2 is someone else entirely. So, here you have CX-2 being happy with his family. I just needed to take a break from my AU event, I have so many ideas for them, but it's like there's a traffic jam in my brain, I can't get the words to word.

Your knuckles are white as you grip the sleeves of your jacket. You’re very, very stressed. But then, you’ve been stressed for the better part of a year.

Hopefully, now that CX is safe, your stress levels will drop to a more reasonable level. And your medical droid will stop chiding you to practice yoga. That would be nice.

Speaking of said medical droid—

The door to the infirmary slides open and the silver droid hovers out and over to you, “The Patient is awake and aware. There seems to be no lasting damage due to his year-long confinement.”

“So I can see him?” You ask.

“He needs his rest.”

“That’s not what I asked.”

The Droid sighs heavily, a very human reaction you can’t help but notice, but then he nods his head. “You brought him food, I take it.”

“Uh, yeah,” You gesture to the small tray of some of CX’s favorite foods. A pasta dish, with some roasted veggies, and a proper dessert. 

The droid eyes the food critically, and then nods, “That is all acceptable.” He says, “I am returning to my charging dock.” And then, abruptly, he hovers off.

You watch him fly into another room, and then slowly stand and grab the tray of food. Hopefully, he’ll be happy to see you. It’d be heartbreaking if you went through all of this trouble, and he wasn’t happy to see you.

Lightly, you knock on the door and then press the control to allow the door to slide open when you hear an answer from inside. You step into the room, making sure to shut the door behind you before you focus your attention on him.

He looks…well, he doesn’t look well.

Oh, sure, he’s still the handsome man that you fell in love with. Only he’s lost a lot of weight, his abdominal muscles are clearly defined, not protected by the thin layer of fat that gave him a very pleasant squish. He also has bags under his eyes, and you’re pretty sure that there’s a hint of grey in his dark curls.

But he’s still CX.

Your name falls from his lips, he looks astonished to see you, and then he averts his gaze, as if ashamed of something.

And that just won’t do.

You cross the small room and set the tray of food on an open table, and then you reach out for him, stopping just shy of touching him. “I missed you,” You say, your voice soft.

His dark eyes snap to meet yours, and the smallest smile crosses his face. “I missed you more,” CX replies, his voice slightly raspy, and for once, you believe it.

He reaches up and takes your hands in his and pulls your hands to his face, and you eagerly cup his face, content to feel his warm skin against your hands again. You don’t fight him when his arms snake around your waist and he pulls you as close as he can without pulling you onto the bed.

He buries his face against your chest and just breathes.

You gently card your fingers through his curls, your other hand moving from his cheek to wrap around him, holding him as tightly as you can. Just enjoying him.

You lightly drop a kiss on the top of his head, “I thought you were dead,” You murmur against his hair.

He trembles slightly, “I’m sorry. I never meant to disappear.”

“I’m not mad.”

“You should be.”

“Never.”

He pulls back, and looks up at you, “Cyare,” this time his hands come up to cup your face, “You don’t understand, I’ve hurt so many people—”

“It doesn’t matter.” You reply, “Not to me. You didn’t have a choice, CX. I know that.”

“That doesn’t make it right.”

You shush him gently, “We’re going somewhere else. Somewhere where the Empire can’t touch you ever again. You have brothers there.”

CX looks baffled for a moment, “Brothers?”

“I think they called themselves Nil…or null?”

He blinks at you, “We’re staying with the Nulls?”

“Yeah, when I was looking for you, I managed to stumble over them. We’ve been offered a place with them. They have a whole settlement for clones and their families.”

“Even clone assassins?”

“All clones,” You reassure, “What do you think?”

He looks uncertain for a moment, “I suppose we can try it out, and see if it works.” CX finally agrees, and then he pulls you in so he’s able to press his face against your chest again, “cyare?”

“Hm?”

“What scent are you wearing?”

“What scent am I—?” You pause and your face flushes, “Oh, right. I’m not, not really.” You gently push him back and lean in to kiss his forehead, “There’s actually something I need to get for you, I left it in my room.”

CX peers at you, “Can it wait?”

“It’s a surprise. And I think, well hope, that you’ll like it.”

CX watches you for a moment, and you smile at him reassuringly, “I’ll be right back, I promise.”

He unwraps his arms from around you, “Alright,”

You beam at him and quickly drop a chaste kiss against his lips before you turn and hurry out of the room. You’re vaguely aware of him sitting up in the medical bed and swinging his legs off the edge as the door slides shut behind you.

You walk the short distance to your room, and don’t bother shutting the door behind you. There’s no need, you’ll only be in here for a moment, after all. You walk around your bed (big enough for you and CX to share), and lean over the much smaller bed, a loving smile crossing your face as you look at the face of your sleeping daughter.

CX’s daughter.

He vanished before you even found out that you were pregnant, so hopefully, she’s a good surprise.

You scoop Eli into your arms, adjusting her weight so she’s comfortably nestled against you, and you head out of the room. The scent that CX asked you about was baby powder, which you seem to always smell like since giving birth to Eli.

You step back into the infirmary, and CX opens his mouth to say something but stops when he sees Eli.

“...cyare?”

You sit on the bed next to him, “This is Eli, she looks like you.” You lightly brush a dark curl off your daughter's forehead, “Luckily, can you imagine if she got stuck with my hair color and your skin tone?”

CX doesn’t say anything, you glance at him and notice that he’s staring at Eli, wide-eyed.

“I found out that I was pregnant 2 weeks after you vanished,” You explain, “She’s 5 months old now. Would you like to hold her?”

“Can I?” He asks, his gaze darting to your face, “Am I allowed?”

“She’s your daughter, you silly man. Here.” You pass the baby over to CX, and adjust his arms so that he’s cradling her properly, “She’s a very calm baby, she doesn’t fuss a lot.”

Cx stares at Eli, mesmerized, “Was the pregnancy easy?”

You shrug, “Unimportant, I had plenty of help.”

“Cyare—”

You smile at him adoringly, “Next time, we’ll do it properly.”

He blinks at you, “Next time?”

“Um, well…if you want a next time.” You correct sheepishly.

You watch as he brushes a finger down Eli’s nose, “I’d like there to be a next time.” CX murmurs, “I can’t believe you gave me a baby.”

“Well, you gave her to me first,” You say with a soft laugh, “I’m just returning the favor.”

He glances at you and a genuine smile, the first one since you’ve been reconnected, crosses his face. “We’re going to be okay,”

“Of course we will.” You lightly lay your head on his shoulder, “We’re going to be better than okay, we’re going to be great.”

You feel him press his head against yours, “I love you,” The words are soft as if he’s not sure he has the right to say them, and you smile. 

You turn your head and press a kiss against his bare shoulder, “I love you too, CX.”