#I have never written a straight character and I don’t think I ever will ❤️

[blakbonnet]

AUTHOR OF THE WEEK: @soupbtch

Ever read a fic and go "they're so 😭" - that's every single Danny fic to me, aka today's second aotw feature, and god, what an amazingly talented author they are.

I'm so glad you decided to write and grace us with your lovely and bonkers fics, because I cannot imagine the OFMD fic world without your incredible Every Part of You series. I cannot imagine logging into this website without another incredible post from you. Every single thing you write (and do) leaves me in stitches and then, more often than not, you straight up chair your friends with your ultra soft way of writing how much they love each other - in between the much needed elbow fucking. You are such an amazingly kind person - hilarious, supportive, and the best cheerleader 💕 Thank you for answering my questions:

What's your writing process like? Do you start with the beginning or the end? Do you write in order or as the scenes come to you?

I start with a pretty detailed outline because if I don’t go in with a plan, I’ll drop threads and/or write myself in circles. Then I have my outline open on half of my screen while I have a separate doc open on the other half where I’m actually writing. I write in order from beginning to end.

Favourite trope or headcanon you like to explore while writing? (Things like Ed's sweet tooth, Stede's ability to bury his feelings etc)

I have a lot of fun writing angst, so I think any facet of that I can explore is a good time. Weigh them down with insecurities and see how far I can bend them with external factors like plot points, each other, or other characters before they snap. So things like Stede believing he ruins everything he touches, Ed believing he doesn’t deserve fine things, and how they both stand in the way of their own happiness because of these feelings. I also love exploring like, the horrible communication skills Ed and Stede have with each other when it comes to their emotions, and setting up story beats where that intercommunication can break down. Because they’re idiots (affectionate).

Whose voice is easier to write - Ed or Stede? Why?

Ed for sure. I find him very easy to connect with, emotionally. All my favorite characters think they’re unlovable monsters and no, this says NOTHING about me personally, etc etc etc.

Your personal favourite thing you've written that you'd like more people to read

Red Skies at Night! It's modern au, but they're still on a boat! If you like slow burn, bitchy Stede, Ed with a tongue piercing, fun costumes, and a big dash of pining, I def recommend checking it out!! ❤️

What is the one word that you think you use a lot?

The one that comes to mind is ‘blink.’ Kind of a funny one, but to me, it’s such a juicy way to imply so much while saying so little, so I know I use it frequently. Stede asks, “Do you trust me?” and Ed blinks back at him as he tries to work out why that question hits him like a truck (because the answer is a very easy yes). Ed says, “You make me happy,” and Stede blinks back at him in awe (because Stede? Making someone happy? That can’t be true). You get it.

Do you have a beta reader? Have they made you a better writer?

Yes, Beedle (@sleepystede) and Connie (@spirker) have both beta read for me! They’ve helped me tremendously with flow and rewording awkward sentences, and I’ve improved a lot from their feedback. Connie has also been invaluable to bounce ideas off of for new fics and just generally pushing me to be more creative through her never-ending support and big beautiful brain.

Why OFMD 🥹

I loved season 1 when I first watched it, but as soon as I saw the season 2 trailer, something clicked in my brain. Where season 1 was slow burn, will-they-won’t-they, is this real or are they queerbaiting, season 2 was posing itself as very, very clearly queer. Stede is going to get his man. That’s it, that’s the show. Undisguised, unabashed, unapologetic gay yearning and gay romance. There are a million other things I can say, but I think it really all comes down to that. What a gift. No one does it like our show. 💖

Please head over to @ofmdlovelyletters (who also made the header) and send your love to all your favourite authors (and authors of the week 😈 watch that blog for some special letters coming your way)

[arizonaaaaaa]

GLEE LGBTQIA+ HEADCANONS- HAPPY PRIDE MONTH PART 2

11- Mike Chang- pansexual

-Goes with my Tina hc, he falls in love for who the person is, not how they are

-really supportive of Tina when she came out

-his father wasn’t supportive at first so Tina had to interfere again but now his cool with Mike

12- Matt Rutherford- gay

-he had a crush on Mercedes before he realized he actually likes guys

-I like to think him and Mike met again in university and they dated for a bit 👉👈

-he had so much potential😭

13- Jesse St. James- bisexual

-not calling Jonathan Groff a bad actor but not even for a second I believed this man was straight

-he was totally into Finn back in season 1

-bi4bi4bi St. HudBerry throuple?

14- Sam Evans- bisexual

-do I have to explain why?

15- Lauren Zizes- pansexual

-I mean, girl slapped Tina’s and Brittany’s asses while singing about what she knows what boys like

-she really deserved to stay in season 3, this 👆 is the only fruity scene she has😭

-her and Tina being goth girlfriends tho

16- Blaine Anderson- gay and trans

-canonically gay

-him being trans is not a unpopular headcanon surprisingly

-I don’t know why but this just makes so much sense

-I don’t have a lot to wright here, not the biggest Blaine fan out there

17- Sugar Motta- lesbian

-crazy how she radiates lesbian energy, like all woman surrounding her just becomes sapphic

-she has the biggest crush ever on Santana, like really, this girl was legit staring at her boobs in 3x04

-she and Unique are girlfriends I don’t make the rules

18- Rory Flanagan- gay

-“you now I wish I was Jessie’s girl”- Damian McGinty Jr on The Glee Project

-this was my Roman Empire

-totally had a crush on Finn and totally was flirting with Sam on Christmas

-Flanevans🔛🔝

19- Joe Hart- questioning

-he is a christian teenager of course he’s queer those are the rules

-not only that but he’s also on the glee club

-I think he never knew his identity, his parents always told him he was going to marry a woman someday so he thought that was the pattern…

-…until he saw Sam shirtless in the locker room

20- Dave Karofsky- gay and Bear

-canon

-in my opinion, as a gay man, he’s the most well written lgbtq character on the show, his story is perfect

- @starpawedart opened a universe of Karofsky ships for me, thank you king✊

-he out of all people deserved a happy ending

-anyways, kurtofsky 🔛🔝

-OMG I FORKGOR HOS ALSO CANONICALLY A BEAR IN THIS HOUSE WE LOVE BEARS, BEARS I LOVE YOU ALL❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

[existentialterror]

Hiii I’m Normal about Dr. Iceberg (red flag, I know) but his name being Julian is complete fanon! Idk where it originally came from, but he’s never referred to as Julian Finn in any onsite tale. The only time he’s been named on the wiki, as far as I know, is when he is called Ellis Gill in a tale called “But We Do Not Talk About That”. While last updated in 2022, was originally written in 2015. Why that name never caught on, I don’t know, but I’m kind of glad. Despite Iceberg being a misogynistic piece of shit, I’m intrigued by the fact that so much is unknown about his character.

Giving him a name detracts from the horror of his story, someone who was once a person being filed down and reshaped to fit a role perfectly, only to snap under pressure and take his own life. And then, if you go with the Resurrection canon/the calm tale, he gets brought back as a cyborg (Cyberg?) that blatantly states it doesn’t have a name. He can’t escape the foundation, even in death.

I’ll cut myself off there— If I don’t, I’m liable to write an entire novel in your inbox.

Fun fish fact (since, if I remember correctly, that is the toll for sending an ask): Lampreys have been around for 400 million years, and haven’t evolved much during that time!

(I forgot about this for a while, sorry!) (In response to this exchange with @scp-l4-clef-alto-001.)

YOOOO Nice research! Today I learned. Thank you! I don't think I'd heard "Finn" before, but I believe you that it's out there. Also thank you for the fish facts. The fish facts are not necessary to send me an ask but are MUCH appreciated. The hagfish is the relative of the lamprey and is another old jawless fish. It has two powers: producing LOTS of mucus, and tying itself in knots, both overhand and underhand. I'm gonna have to read more about ciguatoxins. ❤️🐟

Hey, in exchange for the nice ask and the research, here's a snippet I wrote a long time ago about Sophia Light and your guy. (I like him too! I think he's really interesting.) It's set in the Resurrection canon but back in the past, not long after Dr. Light was recruited to the Foundation. (Might end up on the site eventually but I hate to promise. If nothing else, you know, have this.)

-------------------

1997

Light shows up to her appointments on time. She’s trying out this business of being a person again, really giving it her all, and that’s one of the things she decides: she shows up on time. 

She’s at the entrance to Research five minutes before her assignment today. There are other two people there: a pretty woman with waves of black hair in business casual behind the receptionist deck, and a pretty man in a labcoat whose spiky hair is bleached at the tips. They’re flirting.

No, that’s not true. The man is flirting, voraciously, draped over the desk to get closer. The woman is listening, and looks bored, and tired. She catches Light’s eye, and rolls her eyes.

Light recognizes this situation from the before-world. She knows what to do. She squares her shoulders and walks right up to them. With the energy of a woman who realized yesterday that she has permanent institutional access to every academic journal ever, and has not regretted any sleep- or non-sleep-related decisions made since then, she says, “So do you know about sail jellyfish?”

She proceeds to tell the man about them, at length, for five straight minutes. The man is confused and unhappy but apparently transfixed. The woman restrains herself from laughing and drifts back to her computer screen.

“ - So that’s why the asymmetry is actually a fitness advantage,” she says, “So that they react differently to the same wind patterns and they won’t risk washing ashore. But because that’s basically random, the evolutionary pressure maintains a 50-50 balance.”

“Cool beans,” says the man, whose eyes have glazed over. “Hey, I gotta go, I’ve gotta meet up with someone - uh, Dr. Light, I think - ”

“I am Dr. Light,” Light says. 

The woman doesn’t bother muffling her guffaw. The man - Dr. Iceberg, presumably - looks uncomfortable and then flustered. Light mentally congratulates herself.

“You two are in the dissection room today, right?” the woman says, checking her computer. “Should be set up. Use the cart to move samples, do not lift large samples yourself, I do not care how strong you are, please and thank you. Decon’s ready, just go through the back. One at a time. Ice, you first.”

“Isn’t it set up for multiple people? There’s all the showers and everything - ”

The secretary shrugs. “New policy. Now get out of my sight, Ice.”

“Always good to see you, Break.” Iceberg shoots finger guns at her, as he heads to the decon room entrance.

“Drop dead,” Break calls after him.

They wait for the sounds of the door opening and closing. Break grins at Light. “Thanks for the spiel,” she says. “You got one of those locked and loaded all the time?”

“Usually you have to ask nicely first,” Light says, automatically, because affected confidence was sort of her go-to before, and it seems to be working for her so far. Then she remembers that the last thing this poor woman needs is someone else ambiguously hitting on her and feels bad. But Break just laughs.

“You know that guy?” Break asks.

“I’ve seen him around, I think? I’m - I’m bad with faces.”

“Yeah. Dr. Iceberg. He’s like that. Been a thorn in my fucking side for years. You know, the Foundation is usually pretty good about this kind of thing, in my experience. But Ice, he’s like, Gears’ special little boy, so he can get away with murder.”

Light is confused. “He’s Gears’ son?”

“No, god no - like, you know, he’s… he’s Gears’. …Doesn’t matter. I thought Ice got better for a while there, but it looks like he’s back on his bullshit.”

“Ugh,” Light agrees. 

The bulb over the decon chamber entrance turns green. Break tilts her head at it. “You’re doing, like, an autopsy, right?”

“A necropsy - uh, yeah.”

“Well, that’ll probably bring the mood down, you’ll be fine. He’s not the worst, honestly. But if you need, just say the word ‘Ice’ into the lab comms and I’ll fake an evac drill or something to get you out.”

“Thanks,” says Light. She tries to figure out how serious Break is. Break’s permanent wry plausibly-deniable customer service smile offers no hint.

Maybe Light’s overconfident. Maybe this whole business of being a person again has made her cocky. Perhaps she’s been away from a normal social fabric for so long that she’s lost sense of real implications and rules. But she finds she’s not too worried. “I think it’ll be fine,” she tells Break. “I have a lot more jellyfish facts.”

Break laughs, loudly. “Attagirl.” She waves Light into the decon chamber.

[ninjakk]

Hey on the same note of asking your opinion about fanon things:

How do you feel about the very common thrope in modern au fics of wwx being some sort of vixen? I’ve seen it a lot, where he supposedly knows 100% he’s not straight so he goes around seducing men, sometimes for lols and sometimes for casual sex and then finds lwj and stops

Hey Anon,

Thanks for the ask ☺️

Hmm... well again, it's just so far from what WWX's character really is in canon, it's just odd to read!

I know exactly what you mean as well, as I have been unfortunate enough to come across modern au fanfic with a similar theme. The minute I see anything like that, I don't bother reading it any further. Everyone is entitled to have their own opinion of course, but when a character is so different from the original, I honestly don't see the point in using their name, as in essences it's just a totally different character.

I think when these people write WWX in such a way, they completely forget that he is a total romantic at heart. He's so sweet and wouldn't settle for anything other than a meaningful relationship. In fact, he's literally been holding out for his 'one', his soulmate, all these years. WWX is handsome and charming, there is no way he wasn't propositioned numerous times throughout his first life. Even if for some strange reason he was never directly approached by anyone, he never pursued anyone either - except LWJ on a subconscious level of course ❤️

Legends often gossiped about the YiLing Patriarch’s allegedly amorous life, but in reality, he’d never experienced such hectic feelings before.

Chapter 90 ExR

WWX even confirms he's never been interested in anyone or had such feelings before. Of course, this isn't entirely true and WWX later admits in hindsight, he's had feelings for LWJ all along.

This is the man who guarded his first kiss for 20 years, who carved sweet kissing heads on his wooden headboard above his bed and almost swooned at the romantic story of the Lan sect founder! Does that sound like a man who would have sex with just anyone?!

I think people tend to argue that it's not feasible for someone to be so sweet and save themselves for someone special in a modern au. But that's simply not true and a rather shallow way of thinking. Of course there are people who wait for someone special!

It's in WWX's character to guard his heart, because he actually values himself and what he has to offer a partner. Because he won't settle for anything other than someone sweeping him off his feet and being totally devoted to him, as he would them. Because deep down in his heart, he won't settle for anyone but LWJ.

Even if this is a hypothetical modern au, where WWX hadn't met LWJ yet, he would still be waiting for that special person nevertheless. It's in his character! So a version where WWX seduces people and sleeps around just because it's amusing to him is just the complete opposite to canon WWX. Yes, he absolutely loves having kinky sex marathons with his adoring husband at the end of the novel and in the extras. But this is with his soulmate, the person he's been waiting for his whole life.

Again, I'll let WWX say it for himself:

"...I really just like you so much I want to sleep with you. I don’t want anyone but you—it can’t be anyone but you..."

Chapter 100 ExR

He's only ever wanted to sleep with LWJ. It can't be anyone but him. WWX finally realises LWJ is the one he's been saving himself for, the person he wants to be devoted to, body and soul. LWJ is his soulmate. How much clearer can it be for people to understand WWX wouldn't just sleep around, when the character literally states as such himself.

Even MXTX has mentioned how hard it was to match WWX up with someone during the writing process. Because WWX simply refused to settle for anyone other than the first romantic interest she had written, which was none other than our beloved LWJ himself!

Just let WWX be sweet and romantic, yet kinky and seductive with his one and only LWJ- as it should be 💕

[merakimoonglade]

Ask Game

Thank you very much @yourstarsmyscars ❤️

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 9, about to be 10

2. What's your total AO3 word count? 68,691

3. What fandoms do you write for? Only ACOTAR

4. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? Yes. I love comments. I save all the email notifications and will look at them when I’m feeling like a bad writer or have writer's block. If someone is kind enough to comment on a story I will reply back. It sometimes takes me a few days to reply because life and I want to try to reply back thoughtfully. I’ve also started trying to comment more on fics I read to show my appreciation.

5. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not that I’m aware of. This really only applies to my longfic, Shadowlight, but I purposely try not to read anything that seems similar to what I’m currently writing just so I can’t accidentally steal something from another writer. My TBR is loooong.

6. Have you ever co-written a fic before? Nope. I'm curious what it'd be like though.

7. What's your all-time favorite ship? Elriel. They are the pair that made me want to write fic and at the moment at least the only couple I want to write about. I love them individually, together they are just <chef's kiss>.

8. What are your writing strengths? Ideas. I have a running list of stories I want to eventually write, and I think I come up with some interesting angles to approach things as well as story and character beats.

My style is also pretty strong.

9. What are your writing weaknesses? I edit as I go; I don’t think I’ve ever written a draft straight through. It is very difficult for me to skip ahead and continue writing a scene if I get stuck on a particular thing, like if a paragraph isn't reading how I want or I'm not sure if I want to go a certain route. I want to resolve it because I’m a pantser and it might inform what happens later.

I have trouble concentrating way more often than I like. This can be a big problem because I have young kids and a full time job so I usually only get to write after 10 PM (sometimes I get more writing time on the weekends) and I can’t really afford to waste it. I recently set up website blockers and created a mode on my phone so I can’t pointlessly scroll.

10. First fandom you wrote for? ACOTAR. 😀 I would get story ideas for other media but never felt the need to write for them.

@ryokokicksit24 if you're interested.

[anachilles]

I absolutely love ur teachers au. This may sound extremely random so pls ignore it if u want lol but john and gale’s dynamic and the tension between them reminds me of the time in high school where i was hopelessly in love and pining for my straight best friend and everyone around us was like ahhh birds of a feather ! Two peas in a pod and telling me ah i want the friendship u guys have! hearing those things HURT bc no u don’t want this lol like i was in so much pain. After high school ended she moved away and i moved away and the last time we hung out she gave me a poetry book and had written a little note being like I couldn’t imagine doing any of this without u and no matter what happens u will always b in my heart. I found that note kind of odd bc it felt like a proper goodbye. i never ever told her how i felt and promised myself i never would bc I didn’t want this thing between us to end. We still talked for a while after that but things just started to grow a part and at that point we were just following each other’s socials without much interaction. Then months later i found out she wasn’t straight and had a gf now and i know it was unfair of me but i felt so so bitter bc how could she not see how GONE i was for her. It hurt to see she was acc into girls and maybe she did know i was in love w her but just wasn’t. Into me. I felt bad about being so hurt and also hated myself a little bit bc years of holding my tongue so that our friendship wouldn’t end and it still ended without me ever saying how i rlly felt. We never reconnected and that was that.

All of this to say idk if teachers au john and gale had a similar history or sth but reading these two chapters were so emotional bc it brought me back to that era of my life. SORRY FOR THE LONG ASS RANT. Love ur writing ❤️

Oh, anon!!!!

This is so incredibly touching, and right off the bat, it's the highest compliment in the world to me that someone's read my writing and had such an emotional reaction/feels like they can personally relate to what my characters are going through. Thank you so so much for reading, and I'm so glad you've found something in it up to this point.

I'm really sorry about what you've gone through, my heart broke a little reading your story and I wish you nothing but positive vibes now about it all. I so wish you'd gotten some proper closure. What you've expressed is so so relatable, though, and so many of us have been in similar situations. And it sucks. But you aren't alone!

I don't think it's any big spoiler to say this story will have a happy ending for John and Gale, and I so hope you continue to read, and relate, and enjoy, and maybe potentially find something healing in it? I hope?

Thank you so so much for getting in touch and sharing ❤️

[nightcolorz]

tagged by @molloytheboy Ilysm king thank u for the tag <3 this is so fun

How many works do you have on AO3? 10

What’s your total AO3 word count? 74,616

What fandoms do you write for? right now just the vampire chronicles + amc iwtv. I used to write Batman fan-fiction about the rogues gallery but I stupidly deleted them from a03. I wrote one fic that’s still up about hazbin hotel, and I used to write a lot for our flag means death but for some reason never published any of that

What are your top 5 fics by kudos? You can lean on my arm as you break my heart, Millennia Gate, A Slave For God, церковь в огне, and Must Have Been the Wind

Do you respond to comments? I try to always respond to comments! I love comments so so much and if someone is taking the time to tell me how they feel about my fic then they deserve to hear back from me ❤️🙏‼️ often times all I can think to say is a heart felt thank u, but I want the ppl who get something from my writing to know how much it means to me

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? this is a tough one bcus a lot of my fics are straight up heart attacks. I usually end up defaulting to a small bit of hope to end things off when I go rlly dark, and the only time I didn’t do that was with “You can lean on my arm as you break my heart”, which is probably my darkest fic anyway. A handful of my fics end ambiguously bleak like that but I think the intensity of that one makes the sort of ambiguous sort of bleak ending extra upsetting. But most of my fics end badly

What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Definitely “A vile hunger for your hammering heart” haha. That is one of my favorite fics I’ve written but it’s so niche and stupid it rarely gets any attention 😭🙏

Do you get hate on fics? I only ever got a hate comment once on my tiny Drabble collection, for tagging it as bpd cuz lestat was displaying some heavy bpd traits and they didn’t like that ig. I deleted the comment and vagued them on my tumblr and they showed up in my ask box so I hope this doesn’t summon them 💀. It was funny tho! Rlly rlly confusing stuff😭. But nah otherwise not rlly, which is surprising to me cuz I write some stuff definitely hate worthy 🙏but I don’t think hate is super common on a03, at least in this fandom

Do you write smut? If so, what kind? Yeah sometimes. I only can rlly write smut that’s traumatic and unhealthy 😭. I wrote happy smut once in my life, in “it must’ve been the wind”. Otherwise I write evil smut

Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? I honestly am not a fan of crossovers 💔

Have you ever had a fic stolen?I hope not! 😭. But no I don’t think so.

Have you ever had a fic translated? I wish!

Have you ever co-written a fic before? I consider my claim to fame “millennia gate” to be co written, but it technically isn’t written by two ppl lol. I write it and my boyfriend helps me brainstorm and edit

What’s your all time favorite ship? Daniel x Armand, for sure. Weirdly enough I’ve only ever written and published Drabbles about them. I’ve been planning to write more of them tho 🙏‼️

What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? I hate this evil ass question 😭 I don’t want to say millennia gate bcus I love her and so many ppl love her but I’ve rlly been struggling to find motivation to write her lately. Millennia gate is a reflection of such a specific time in my life and I used it to vent a bunch of issues I was having, and it’s hard for me to tap into that now that I’ve grown sm as a person. I think and hope that inspiration will come back to me tho cuz I hate the idea of abandoning her 🙏 my love child truly.

What are your writing strengths? I’ve been told I’m good at writing dialogue, themes, and pacing. Ive also been told im good at understanding and portraying characters in a way that’s true to the source material+ compelling, which is good cuz I write fanfic lol. A lot of ppl read my fics cuz they like my metas, so I think that’s a strong suit. I’m also a freak for metaphors 😭 oh my god I use elaborate figurative language in casual conversation, it’s bad. The best praise I ever got was from a teacher, she said I write like Anne rice but way better 😭. I don’t rlly think that’s true, but I love it.

What are your writing weaknesses? I find it hard to be subtle and let my writing speak for itself, I tend to hammer things home a bit too strongly so that the effectiveness wears off. I always fight the urge to write big blocks of unnecessary text just so the audience knows what I’m getting at, over explaining and stuff. I struggle with writing sentences that aren’t super long and clunky. I’m rlly bad with grammar. I can’t spell 😭. I also am blind to the quality of my own writing and tend to over edit unnecessarily cuz I find it hard to open up to beta readers

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I do it all the time. I don’t use google translate, I try to use more deluxe sources when I write in languages I don’t speak because I’d be so embarrassed if I got something wrong 😭. But I rarely write in a language I don’t speak for more then a sentence or two. Once someone who speaks French commented that they loved that they could read the French in my Lestat fic and I was so happy and relieved it was coherent to someone who speaks the language 😭

First fandom you wrote for? The first fandom I wrote for was technically the how to train your dragon books in my childhood notebook, but the first fanfic I ever published was for Harry Potter. I remember it was an angsty backstory fic about Remus lupin, lmao.

Favorite fic you’ve written? it changes, but right now it’s церковь в огне, because I re read and think about it as if it’s a fic I haven’t written 😭. But I have my favorite memories attached to “must have been the wind”, “A vile hungering for your hammering heart” and Millennia gate. Those last three have started inside jokes with me and my friends, and r often quoted to me 😭 so definitely I consider them favorites thank u again for the tag Finn!! Tagging @oopsallvampires @discomfort-character @lestatslestits

[xilianx]

AO3 ASK GAME DO THEM ALL DO THEM ALL NEOW ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! 💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥 (pls)

I AM...SO LATE AHHHH IM FINALLY GETTING THROUGH THESE I'M SO SORRY!!!

Just saw these 20 Questions for Fic Writers and decided I wanted to do it so ....... here it is! Lmao.

How many works do you have on AO3?

20!

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

513,741 words…oh lawd

3. What fandoms do you write for?

I’ve written for Godzilla in the past but now I write just for Bayonetta! More will come eventually…if my hyperfixation can be dethroned lol

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

The Witch of Causality (Bayonetta 3 reimaging/re-work)

Some Words Left Unsaid (AncientBayonetta AU where shit almost went reaaaaally bad for BayoJeanne)

Down By The Red Poppies (Sequel fic to “Where the Lobelia Would Grow, more Bayonetta AU)

Where The Lobelia Would Grow (First ever fic I wrote for the Bayonetta fandom!)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes! I try to at least. I love getting comments on my fics (i mean, what fic author doesn’t???) And I love all the support that’s given and the fact someone takes time to leave me a comment, long or short, just makes my day 😭😭 I’m sorry to those who comment that I hadn’t replied too or haven’t too yet. I promise you I appreciate them so much ❤️

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Ooooooo….I wanna say either ‘Vessel’ or ‘Forgotten Visage’. Both have pretty harsh endings that only insulate that it leads to more pain later. ‘Vessel’ is just straight up a Soulsbourne boss style fight with all the tragedy of a Soulsbourne boss fight tied in, and ‘Forgotten Visage’ is just sad AU of what evil Balder was doing right after Rosa died…so yay, they don’t go anywhere sad. BUT IF I HAD TO CHOOSE….I’m gonna throw it at Vessel lol

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Idk if I’m gonna get some hate from certain oomfs from this, but I’m gonna say ‘Down By The Red Poppies’ has one of the happiest BECAUSE of everything that had happened to all the characters throughout the fic (And even the first fic!) and making it in the end. There was def a lot of hurt and pain and angst throughout Lobelia and Poppies, but I think the ending the fic made it all the worthwhile and despite the pain/tragedy, it’s gonna be okay 🥲

8. Do you get hate on fics?

No, not really. Not that I’ve ever seen!

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I have written smut ONCE!...It was the last half of one chapter out of a 117,000 word fic…HAVE I ATTEMPTED TO WRITE MORE SMUT SINCE, YES AND I AM NOT STRONG ENOUGH TO FINISH IT YET!! The smut in Red Poppies was my first ever smut and it was, like, tender and sweet?? But the Balrosa smut that I have a low simmer is def meant to embarrass that fucking twink lol

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

I haven’t, and don’t plan to!! Not my thing, to read or write.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I don’t think so, not that I am aware of…

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Another one that’s; if any of them are, I’m not aware of it!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No, I haven’t done anything like that yet! Would be cool to do it, if given he chance!!

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

YOU ALREADY KNOW!!! BRING EM OUT, TOMMY:

15. What's the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Ohhhhhh hohohho hahaahah AHAHAHAHAAHAHAA!!! There’s so many lmao I have so many that are stuffed in folders and forgotten about. There’s a few multi-chapter ideas I wanted to try and do, but with Witch of Causality going on rn (and going on for awhile now) I doubt I’ll ever start them for long long time… (Chinese BayoJeanne AU fic based off of Causality, etc).

But if there is a KING of unfinished WIPS…it’s my now long forgotten Godzilla Final Wars fics from years prior. Sucks because I got to fic 3 out of the trilogy, but I’m just not in it anymore…wish I had the willpower to finish it, but alas, never will.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Lots of my oomfs say all my fight scenes actually ‘feel’ like what Bayonetta fights, so I wanna say I write fight scenes pretty well!! I would say characterization, but I’m only comfortable with a few, not all…

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

looks at long list of comments and notes from my beta reader for the the insane amount of grammatical errors, structure errors, and sentences that just make no sense uhhh….so yeah, I kinda fuck up the actual writing aspect a lot asdjkasdsda

But seriously, I think sometimes (at least for recent, larger fics), I’ve had to pull back on the amount of filler that’s not necessary or structure of a chapter to make it actually make sense…(THANK YOU KELS FOR YOUR CONTINUED SUPPORT, YOU KEEP SAVING MY ASS!!)

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I think if you’re not super well-versed in the language, definitely consult or check with someone who knows!! Or do a bit of digging, especially if you plan on using quite a bit of it!

19. First fandom you wrote for?

GODZILLA!!! Funny enough, I have literally only ever written fics for the Godzilla fandom and Bayonetta fandom. I have read quite a bit for other fandoms, but Godzilla is my dear yee ol faithful!! (Funny enough, it’s specifically only for Godzilla Final Wars as well lol)

20. Favorite fic you've ever written?

This one is actually hard…hmmm…It would have to be a tie between Lobelia/Red Poppies. I kinda put them in the same box, even tho they are 2 different fics. Honestly, it was just so fun coming in blind to a new fandom and just slapping together whatever I wanted to do because I really wanted to tell the story and had fun with it. I don’t even think it’s my best stuff, but damn nothing beats crashing into the Bayo fic community with a fic that just (spoilers) kills little Cereza in her own story and I have no regrets ASKJDSADHASDHA

THANK YOU FOR TAGGING ME IN THIS KELS!! I'm so late with this, and I feel like this has been tagged to other oomfs, so I will just leave this open to anyone who wants to do it!!

[deliciouskeys]

001 for Maevelander :)

* when I started shipping it if I did:

Episode 3 of season 1! They had so many good interactions. I was really intrigued by what kind of person Maeve was to be able to not only date HL, and also somehow manage to extricate herself out of a relationship with him, still be alive, and still have him clearly pining to get back together.

“See that’s what I like about you. You always tell me the truth”. And then in episode 4… the harrowing plane scene. The Boys writers say it sets up a contrast between HL and Maeve’s moralities, of course, but I thought it was also a fascinating example of someone staying silent about a serious crime because it’s their ex-partner who did it. Her evolving and increasing disgust and self-judgement as events spiral out afterwards was very interesting to watch.

* my thoughts:

I do think with each season their interactions got less satisfying 😕 But I adored morallygray!Maeve walking with the devil side by side in season 1 ❤️❤️❤️

* What makes me happy about them:

I thought Maeve was a badass female character, and I really like to think/read about how she first discovered and tapped into HL’s mental subbiness.

* What makes me sad about them:

Well, the fact that they were never really on the same page at all about the relationship is pretty sad. The scene in S3 where she tells HL that she hated him from the start makes her yet another person gaslighting him (don’t think the writers intended this scene to be tragic but it was)

* things done in fanfic that annoys me:

I have to say none of the Maevlander fics I’ve come across have annoyed me. Hypothetically, I’d be annoyed by a fic where HL was cruel and abusive to Maeve and she was meek and long-suffering.

* things I look for in fanfic:

Maeve being dominant in bed, but also Maeve being afraid of HL. The fics that pull off both of those aspects really rev me up. Also, it’s not a requirement but I’ve been delighted by the percentage of fics for this pairing that involve a pegging element— not a necessity by any means, but makes me feral.

* Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: 

Maeve can be with Elena if that makes her happy (maybe this is my own problem but I wish Elena were written as a more interesting character. I didn’t quite feel the chemistry.) I loved Maeve with Butcher, even though it came out of left field— but it would have been an interesting endgame, imo. For HL… he probably needs to end up with someone who genuinely loves him. Which might be impossible if he doesn’t get depowered. He’s going to have to be single dad parenting Ryan :/

* My happily ever after for them:

Homelander harvests her eggs and makes super babies via surrogate…. Juuuuust kiddingggg. I would have loved if Maeve never broke up with him but stayed on as the jaded, cool kid vaping in the bathroom while HL tries to reason with her and please her with romantic gestures, and never dumps her even though she’s undermining his clean cut earnest image and costing him points.

* who is the big spoon/little spoon:

I love HL being possessive of her, hovering around her, coming up behind her, trying to get into her space (Clarification: don’t condone irl, just compelling dynamic). He’s the big dumb eager spoon that her little spoon has to stave off periodically.

* what is their favorite non-sexual activity:

Apparently he liked weekend getaways to Europe with her. I think HL is into the glitz and PR of the relationship. But Maeve didn’t really enjoy any of that. I’d love to have had a glimpse into what HL references as understanding what it’s like for one another, being lonely at the top of the fame pyramid. Did they have quiet nights in where they watched movies and ate ice cream straight out of the pint container? We’ll probably never know from canon.

[artistnerd24]

Oh gosh I’ve been forgetting to check my notify again .-. apologies

THANK U ROSEY FOR THE TAG, I REALLY LOVE DOING THESE AND THESE ARE ONE OF MY FAVORITE PICK-ME-UPS ❤️

📷 What’s set as your phone’s lockscreen?

Uhhh… it’s a cute photo of me in 1st-grade during Christmas and I’m not really comfortable sharing it 😅

🍫 Cheese or chocolate?

Definitely chocolate, I got a sweet tooth that will never extinguish :3

✨ Do you have any nicknames?

My parents and family call me a shortened version of my name and my internet nickname was just Nerd cause I never really had online friends but since joining Tumblr I’ve now become Anii :]

🎵 Last song you listened to?

Nangs by Tame Impala! Not my favorite song of theirs but I was in a mood for it

✏️ Have you ever written fanfiction?

Uh I made 2 so far and one of them I didn’t even finish because the character it was focused on confirmed her death and I no longer had motivation due to sadness (qJaiden 😭) and I haven’t had time to make more yet but once I’m done with exams, I’ll try to either continue or make something new!

😏 Are you on discord?

No sadly, I really want to though!

 💛 Do you have any piercings?

Like Rosey, my ears are pierced :D

🐰 What do you think says the most about a person?

For me it’s how I see them acting with friends because a friend group and a person’s role in it tells me a lot about their interests, what they lean towards, and just in general what kind of person they are. Sometimes it isn’t really accurate but I’m not really good at reading people 😅

🍪 If you were a cookie, what kind would you be?

Euuhhhh… I feel like I would be a ginger cookie but I’m not sure

🐶 Are you more of a dog person or a cat person?

AURGHH I LOVE BOTH BUT IF I HAD TO CHOOSE ONE AS A PET IT WOULD BE DOG, I’M SORRY CATS, I LOVE YOU TOO

🎧 Headphones or earbuds?

Earbuds for the same exact reason as Rosey (it’s a struggle for the visually-impaired 😭)

🌼 What’s the last thing you said out loud?

“Highlights (now the rest in Ukrainian ->) are just the most important or exciting clips.” (I know this is weird but me and my dad were searching for the replay of round 2 of a tennis tournament we watch and he said to click on the choice that said ‘tennis highlights’ and he doesn’t know what highlights are so I just explained it and them left him to find it by himself cause I had to unpack)

🙃 What’s a weird fact that you know?

There is a rock or sculpture on Mars that resembles a human face.

🦉 Are you a morning person or a night owl?

Night owl definitely! It’s much as I complain about lack of sleep, I constantly can’t and then I just stay up and then wake up with back pain ��

🧸 Favorite place to nap?

I can’t nap for the life of me but I am always most comfortable in my bed so there 🙃

🏳️‍🌈 Are you a member of the LGBTQIA+ community?

Uhh… so far, I’m just straight but I know things change when you get older so who knows but right now I’m pretty confident that I’m not gay (still support anyone who is though ❤️)

🦋 Describe yourself in three words.

Nerd. Alien. Cartoon.

👖 Jeans or sweatpants?

Sweats are so comfy, I love jeans too but sweats are my thing you know

🥤 What’s your go-to Starbucks order?

I don’t really go to Starbucks often, when I do I just get anything that has chocolate or peppermint 😅

🧡 A color you can’t stand?

Yellow, 2nd grade ruined it for me

💎 What’s your most prized possession?

… Probably my stuffed animals (If I had to choose one then my rabbit since it was one of the first I’ve ever had and I’ve had it for almost a decade)

☕ Coffee or tea?

Tea tea tea tea tea tea tea tea tea tea :3

🦖 Favorite extinct animal?

Elasmotherium sibiricum, or a Siberian unicorn 🦄

🌙 How long have you been on tumblr?

Just started in December so 6 months :D

🌴 Desert island item?

A working phone will cellular data for an emergency call get me off the damn island before I need to worry about surviving

^Yeah what Rosey said 😅

🐸 Describe your aesthetic.

I think space/magic is normally what I go for with pastels mixed in at times

🔮 What’s your dream job?

I really do not know. My possibilities over the last 3 years fluctuates from computer programmer to astrologist to quantum physicist to director of an animated show to storyboard artist and then constantly switching so idk

💙 Relationship status?

Single pringle who is not yet ready for a relationship <3

🌿 Describe your favorite outfit.

Umm probably jean jacket or those long coats with baggy jeans… I don’t really know, I don’t have good fashion sense

🎤 Is there a song you know all the lyrics to?

Many but if I had to list one then Two Time by Jack Stauber

🤎 What color is your hair?

Brown!

💌 Do you talk to yourself?

Yeah ofc!

💄 Do you wear makeup?

… no but I think I should start too…

🌸 Best compliment you ever received?

I don’t know, I have a really bad memory

💞 @ your favorite blog

Just one?! No no no no no, I’m doing multiple…

@elkyralt @sunnyside-sunset and @bloodpen-to-paper (<- feel free to tell me if u don’t want to receive these :])

~ 💖 ASK GAME 💖 ~

📷 What’s set as your phone’s lockscreen?

🍫 Cheese or chocolate?

✨ Do you have any nicknames?

🎵 Last song you listened to?

✏️ Have you ever written fanfiction?

😏 Are you on discord?

 💛 Do you have any piercings?

🐰 What do you think says the most about a person?

🍪 If you were a cookie, what kind would you be?

🐶 Are you more of a dog person or a cat person?

🎧 Headphones or earbuds?

🌼 What’s the last thing you said out loud?

🙃 What’s a weird fact that you know?

🦉 Are you a morning person or a night owl?

🧸 Favorite place to nap?

🏳️‍🌈 Are you a member of the LGBTQIA+ community?

🦋 Describe yourself in three words.

👖 Jeans or sweatpants?

🥤 What’s your go-to Starbucks order?

🧡 A color you can’t stand?

💎 What’s your most prized possession?

☕ Coffee or tea?

🦖 Favorite extinct animal?

🌙 How long have you been on tumblr?

🌴 Desert island item?

🐸 Describe your aesthetic.

🔮 What’s your dream job?

💙 Relationship status?

🌿 Describe your favorite outfit.

🎤 Is there a song you know all the lyrics to?

🤎 What color is your hair?

💌 Do you talk to yourself?

💄 Do you wear makeup?

🌸 Best compliment you ever received?

💞 @ your favorite blog.

Reblogs are appreciated!

[navree]

I love House Tyrell too !! ❤️❤️❤️ That’s who really knows how to play the Game of Thrones - looking at you Olenna 👀 -

Speaking of House Tyrell, don’t you think that what Margaery was accused for, I mean adultery and disloyalty because she too enjoyed the company of handsome men, was very similar to what Rhaenys was accused for? 🤔 Was the concept the same for both of them? Are they really guilty? Honestly, they seem to have many similarities - like being shrewd and maybe even manipulative politicians - and I would love to read your thoughts ❤️

There's some similarities, but not a whole lot. The main thing with the accusations against Margaery is that they're not whispers at court like it seems to have been with Rhaenys, these are legal accusations of treason. Margaery is currently waiting to be tried, in what amounts to a Westerosi court of law, for committing high treason against the king, her husband, by engaging in affairs with other men. These are allegations being made publicly and specifically with the intent to prove her guilty of a crime. In Rhaenys's case, these appear to have amounted little more to the occasional rumor, certainly never anything as formal as what Margaery's going through.

There's also the place they're in as queens when any allegations of impropriety are being made. Margaery is the wife of a king with very little authority, since Tommen is like eight years old and isn't anywhere near power right now, and she herself has no way of cementing any power the way a queen typically would, since she's sixteen and it is generally frowned upon for sixteen year olds and eight year olds to consummate a physical relationship. Rhaenys, on the other hand, had been Aegon's wife for a while, and was very clearly favored by him, and had cemented her place in his life as his preferred romantic and sexual partner in a way that was clearly visible to everyone. That's probably why there wasn't anything beyond the occasional rumor of her liking comely young men, because it wouldn't have been able to get that far with an authoritative king who wouldn't take those accusations against his wife sitting down.

So on that front, they're both in very different situations, with Margaery's being far more precarious, but the original concept is kind of the same, since the idea of "this powerful woman is actually a secret slut" is something we've seen not only throughout history, but still being done to modern female politicians and leaders today (that or calling them frigid robots).

Is Margaery guilty? Honestly, no. It's been a good while since I read AFFC, but it seems to be pretty clear that all of this was made up out of whole cloth and all orchestrated by Cersei because she wanted Margaery out of the picture in order to forestall the coming of Maggy's prophecy. She convinces people she knows to claim that Margaery was unfaithful, or that they were unfaithful with Margaery, and all of those people recant their charges. The only one who doesn't is the Blue Bard, who is very explicitly written as having been tortured into confessing to the point where he's gone mad as a result of the ordeal. No one was concocting any rumors that Margaery was unfaithful or promiscuous before Cersei decided to do her thing, and it's pretty clear not only to the reader, who has access to Cersei's thoughts, but also to a lot of the people in King's Landing, that these allegations just straight up aren't true.

Is Rhaenys guilty? A bit harder to say. Unlike ASOIAF, F&B is not a proper narrative, where you can get into people's heads and see their thoughts and motivations. It's a history book, without the access to inner monologues and closed door conversations and private accountings that a narrative with POV and characters can have. And this section of F&B is, as I've said repeatedly, really just not one that has a lot of information about the people it's talking about, and certainly never anything from their perspective. So, while we can't ever know for certain whether Rhaenys did or didn't have affairs, I'm pretty certain that she didn't. The main point of evidence just seems to be that a) she patroned singers who happened to be young, we know that her patronage had a distinct propagandist bent that was her primary motivator and b) that Aenys didn't really act like Aegon, but those rumors about Aenys are explicitly stated to have died away the second Aenys was able to bond with Quicksilver (and in general, I'm willing to cut a toddler going through a mental breakdown because his mom was very suddenly killed in action some fucking slack).

As to whether Margaery and Rhaenys are similar, maybe. They're both intelligent and they both possess a clear understanding of the political landscape, and appreciate using politics to shape how the kingdom is run as opposed to a more militant approach, and they're both well loved by the populace and appear to know how to use that to their advantage. But we don't really know all that much about Rhaenys, and meanwhile with Margaery, since we're not in her head and we view her through people who have a pretty distorted view of the world (Sansa and Cersei), so we don't necessarily have the clearest view on her either. I think Rhaenys is also just a bit more settled, she enters the history books already as a woman in her mid-twenties, where Margaery is still just a teenager, and as such has a bit more mastery over herself and the world around her than Margaery currently does.

[timothylawrence]

Tim: ur husband looks gnc as fuck

Sasha: what the fuck are you ever saying

[mj-is-writing]

happy blorbo blursday! I'd love to hear some rambles about some of your disabled characters, whoever's on your mind! as a disabled writer it always makes me so happy to see disability rep :D

Let’s GO I love talking about them! Also it’s disability pride month and talking about rep is important, so this was a great ask ❤️

So, creating the character of Trevor is very different from what I normally do. Basically, I realized that I’d never written about a wheelchair user, ever, and said “oh fuck, well that has gotta change” and committed to giving the next OC I ever worked on a wheelchair. It was a few weeks after that that a friend of mine and I started working on a story concept together, and between the two of us, I was given basically free reign over characters and concept art. So I immediately did several drawings of Trevor in his chair, did some research on reasons a person may need mobility aids, and went to my friend the next day and said “here he is.” That’s the story. That’s where he came from. And since then, he’s become one of my favorites to think about. He’s so much fun and adds a lot to the comedic tone of the story by being a very upbeat and relaxed guy in complete contrast to his nervous and frantic best friend (essentially it’s one guy who is stuck in a cosmic horror story but all of his friends think it’s a chill slice of life). He does have platform crutches, but he doesn’t use them much. He has a pet cat.

A lot of my characters are ND, like. A lot. I don’t even know where to begin listing them all. I am very emotionally attached to every OC I’ve ever had, but I will pick Joshua to talk about a bit here. He has ADHD, he exclusively wears rainbow socks, and he works in a chill little magic bookstore. He’s struggling but he is so loved by his family, his boss, his friends, and he does alright. He has magic abilities that are very unique from the other characters.

I’m still working on worldbuilding for this story, so none of the characters have names yet, but I have one WIP where a good chunk of the main cast is disabled. The protagonist is a double amputee, and one of her friends designed customs prosthetics for her. One of her friends is Hard of Hearing. Another (the protag’s platonic soulmate) is, now that I think about it, probably ADHD? I didn’t have that in mind when coming up with the character, but it would be a valid interpretation of him. He also has this… supernatural thing going on that could be compared to chronic pain and fatigue; I normally dislike the chronic illness rep only being a “curse” or a spell or something, and don’t usually write that kind of thing, but I think it works here partially because this world doesn’t shy away from accommodations and disability already, and we see evidence of that in the main cast. Were he the only one in an otherwise abled group, I probably wouldn’t write this the same. That would feel like a trope to me. (That’s not to say that magic can’t be used as a good metaphor, I’m a huge fan of how The Owl House handles Eda’s curse, I just don’t trust myself not to handle it badly.)

I mentioned for another Blorbo Blursday an unnamed character who I think I referred to as Francis for that post? He belongs here as well, being non-speaking autistic. Just thinking about the magical AAC devices that he has access to make me happy. I’m not the kind of person who wants to write a ton about hardships and struggles; disability is hard, it’s disabling (duh), but that doesn’t mean that all disabled people are living in straight up misery 24/7, and I want to include representation of people who do get the accommodations they need, who are loved and supported, who get to be heroes in both big and small ways. Francis struggles a lot. He has a lot of support needs. But he also has joy. I want the reader to always remember that he has joy.

I don’t always do the best job when it comes to representing groups I’m not a part of. I know this, because it will always be true that im not perfect. But im trying really hard, and I really care about these characters. And I hope that someday, other people will care about them too. ❤️

[chdarling]

i totally relate to your tags on that looking/acting gay posts and i hope you will find the courage to post your gay stuff one day i would be delighted to read it <3

i have recently come out as bi and i keep forgetting to come out to everyone and i really look super straight and when i tell people they're always so shocked and it's just. so stupid. so what it's not written on my face that i find women attractive. it always makes me kind of sad to think that i don't fit into the stereotype, as if i'm not gay enough to identify with the community, like i'm doing something wrong. also the feeling of not belonging is stronger since i lean more towards men as a bi woman and the biphobia gets so tiring. sometimes it feels like bi people don't belong anywhere, because we're never gay enough or straight enough. sorry to come ranting in your inbox i just wanted to talk about it with (at) somebody. i hope you have a lovely day!

Oh, anon. I’m really sorry you’ve been made to feel like you don’t belong to the queer community. You do. You do, you do, you do. And you’re always welcome to come ranting to my inbox 😉❤️

I just want to say, you don’t have to come out to anyone unless you want to. It is not a requirement, it does not make you any less queer, and you are not doing anything wrong if people assume you are straight. That’s on our fucked up society, not you. You do not have to prove your queerness to anyone to belong. It is an innate part of you and not a checklist of commodities to flaunt on social media. And anyone who says otherwise can go jump. 🙃

I did the whole “coming out” thing in my early twenties because I felt like I had to. I felt like I wasn’t allowed to be a lesbian unless I made the announcement. It was...really traumatic. I lost some friends. I lost myself for a while. Shit was rough.

I got through it, and then, one day, I found I had to come out again. Because I had all new people in my life. And then again. And again. And again.

I don’t bother “coming out” anymore. The people I want to know know, and everyone else can wonder all they like. It’s not that I’m in the closet, it’s just that at some point you realize “coming out” never, ever stops. That new co-worker who wants to know all about your boyfriend, surely a pretty gal like you...? Your (ex) friend who keeps ‘forgetting’ or thinks it was just a phase and you’re over it now, you’ve come to your senses and totally want to date him. Every new person who comes into your life and just assumes you are straight. It’s so fucking exhausting.

The anonymity of the internet is occasionally a refuge for this, but I’ve been on here a long time, and sadly I’ve seen elements of the queer community eat itself alive from time to time. Ace discourse. Transphobia. Bi-phobia. Queer is a slur. Maybe it’s because I was so starved for community as a teen, but I do not understand this urge to gatekeep, to bar people from community because they don’t experience being queer Exactly Like You. We need each other and all our different experiences, and the exclusion is absolutely stupid anyway because I guarantee that anyone who in any way, shape or form deviates from the path of straightness has felt the blunt force of their Otherness. Exploring that and then finding that the “community” says there actually isn’t a place for you unless you act like X, Y, Z? Fucking devastating. Because the straights want you to do A, B, C and you can’t do that either so now what??

When I’m not obsessively writing fanfiction about dead wizards, I am working on an original novel in which the main character is a lesbian. She’s deeply flawed. She is angry and vengeful and occasionally cruel. And I trip myself up SO much by worrying whether it will be considered ‘bad representation’ by the queer community. And then I worry that if I ever actually did try and publish it (big if), am I going to have to go through another big “coming out” to prove that I’m allowed to write gay stories? Am I going to have to do that over and over and over again? Am I going to have internet warriors trolling through my social media, deeming me Not Gay Enough?

And like a lot of this angst is admittedly the product of an anxiety disorder, but also, you log onto twitter and you see this shit happening over and over and over — writers, actors, randos who voiced an opinion, all being deemed straight until they’re forced to out themselves — and it’s just fucking traumatizing. Like, I just want to be. I just want to write my stupid little stories and be.

And it’s tricky, right? Because it is important to create opportunities for queer people to tell their own stories, rather than yet another gay trauma movie by a straight man (or misogynistic gay man, see: Ryan Murphy). But the requirement that you must prove yourself Overtly Gay in a Specific Way to qualify feels so dangerous to me and it leaves so many voices silenced and it just breaks my heart.

Ok, sorry. I’m done. 😂 This is as close as I get to queer discourse on this app, because like I said, I’m tired and I just want to be. But it’s been weighing heavy on my heart lately, so here’s a Tuesday morning rant from yours truly. The day can only go up from here, right? 😉

Lots of love to you anon, and please don’t listen to anyone who tells you that you don’t belong. ❤️