#I hate the character limit in c
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nnnnnnnnnnnnno maa'am
#my want to draw traditionally literally split me open for the past week and leaves me literally depressed i'm so serious i can't even look -#- @ my art programs without wanting to throw up omfg should;ve never picked up those pencils#but it's ok i just needed a nap#something so relatable about them i think nelvas has something in it for everyone meanwhile eltl is secluded art museum.#it's very possible to walk around in neloth's and talvas' brains but eltl is off limits. they will NOT! get no drawings like this outta me#wtf r they thinking ........#< eltl not nelvas#something nobody on dis earth can understand ..........#talvas wants to live he likes living but neloth's presence is so strong that it overrides and deletes his will to live.#bruuuuuuuuh#i bet the feeling of neloff is in everything he does if they ever part ways he won't be able to fold clothes or anythign without wanting -#- 2 cry . for what reason . idk bc neloth once yelled at him for folding clothes like shit .what am i on rn#(talvas thoughts mode) I want this old man to hug meeee😢😢😢#NELOFF DO IT and smash him too before i do it first .#me and neloth are the same person tho so it doesn;t matter but w/e#i'm getting emotional over them right now this cannot be real#i love her .... (Skyr1m)#i opened the game for .5 minutes today to take pics of a character uight what a beautiful game.#Te/s having such extensive lore ruins the whole entire game and the franchise but whatever . skyr1m is an art piece that's just how i feel#also this might be a very hard pill to swallow for some people but t*lvas is literally a kin Vessel for young women that keep getting -#- hit on by men twice or thrice their age when they're just trying to live their life .#this feels so profound to me i need dis shit inmy discord bio right NOEW.#Talvas................................#(eyes watering) (holding palm out)#suicide //#just in case but this tag would've gone crazy with my drawings of ulfr*c from late 2022 where i drew him with slit wrists. very artsay#is it not. i didn't like neither of those drawings tho i need to revisit cus i can feel ulfr*c on a diffaraaant level#when will i run out of tags. the way you can tell i just LUH talvas look at me drawing his hair in that second pic 😑BRU#look at me also trying to replicate pencils digitally in the first.. hmmm i don't hate it#at least it soothes me and i don't have pencil withdrawal
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Taking a break from my current piece for one of my tried and true relaxation methods of just drawing different individual features. I went into the Beta Kid designs blind for their facial features, but I'd rather be more prepared when I get to the Alternian trolls. I'm not 100% set on some of these, but they're good first passes for now.
Trolls are in color order starting from top-bottom and then left-right, beginning with Karkat.
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#homestuck#alternian trolls#beta trolls#god i hate that term b/c it doesn't match letterwise with alternia so the alternian trolls and beforean trolls are always opposite#from what i think they are#wow i didn't know there was a character limit on tags is that new???#karkat vantas#aradia megido#tavros nitram#sollux captor#nepeta leijon#kanaya maryam#terezi pyrope#vriska serket#equius zahhak#gamzee makara#eridan ampora#feferi peixes#Youtube
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Finally sat down to watch that bloodlines video because I didn't have the time to read more than the bullet points earlier and I'm a little bit very disappointed 😞
#personal#i don't think we'll get a character creator#and i hate the third person camera. the limited dialogue options.#or that we cant roleplay whoever we want to anymore#dont get me wrong there are games i love with very similar concepts my expectations for this are just different#because bloodlines 1 is one of my favourite games so i wanted the full on roleplay again and the unapologetic writing#2 just seems to go the action rpg route now :/#I'll get used to it and then I'll probably be excited again just rn this is not what i wanted :c
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take 4: the tension (gulf spanned with incomplete, continuously crumbling bridges) between the perspective of oneself as the Deservingly Epic Winner Protagonist Person who dares to be Out Of Line versus the need to actually completely stay in line within this b/c it hinges on being in harmony with the preexisting hierarchies which will supposedly reward the "merit" of this Actor. while everyone whose existence is Inferior, according to the hierarchies, is defined by being Out Of Line, which these same people resent & respond to, also Staying In Line with the hierarchy, by trying to reinforce the dynamics of these inferior / superior groupings. "everything pathologized about the inferior groups / rejected as what's Wrong with their existence so as to "cause" these dynamics is "take 4" b/c this is from me trying to write about winston quant kid 2 billions like holy shit a series operating on this logic huh, giving this unvarnished expression of this perspective b/c it's assuming (& requiring...) we all have it. winston is constantly responded to as Guy Who's Out Of Line. the "superior" parties who hate him & get to have him as their punching bag / hit with the butt of the joke / at least ignored & excluded, but taken advantage of, but who all have to Stay In Line, how's that going for them even when it comes to the writing, where characters can't do anything if it's too disruptive of the In Universe hierarchy, unless it's a finale zone for a permissable shakeup, where ppl insulating/supporting each other being a bit Out Of Line is not a problem b/c they individually recognize each other's transcendently True worthiness in thee objective hierarchy we all assume exists, but definitely can never disrupt the out of universe hierarchy, e.g. the show decides wendy is the true hero, b/c she deserves to be. taylor has to hire back dollar bill & stand back while wags & wendy take the lead & the spotlight & hate the autistic guy they hired & show up so the Winner, who was written into the show with nothing to do but tell taylor they're not quite as good as wendy & then provide a vagina amidst otherwise being an Everyemployee who fails to even differentiate from an Axe Cap style everyemployee, can announce their winningness detached from anything that actually happened ever.
counterpart to winston's departure needing an audience of people to stand there & stay in line, which on that side of the same coin meant punishing his Out Of Lineness that doesn't even act like anyone bothered to think of [this is one particular preexisting guy. you thought he liked scifi once before you lost interest in even suggesting he has interests, though, will roland likes scifi, will roland wore his own open buttonup as quant kid 2 that'd define the Look, will roland happened to have the facial hair just kept for production b/c who would care, will roland brought the entire je ne sais quoi acting interpretation that made quant kid 2 go from "out of line guy we kill once" to "out of line guy we keep around to kill all thee time until finale 'haha but seriously though' material means pushing him out of the way in s6 & then s7 alike" like hmm] like everyone just spitballed "annoying things! cringe loser things! things that would never happen to me, a deserving winner!!" & put it in as easter eggs as though that would even make sense, much less [you have no other priority?] but like. rian's sendoff didn't do any better for acting like she's a specific character who's said & done things we're meant to remember & have thought about then & now. taylor didn't get to have resolution with philip. they Had to have resolution with wendy that, again, has nothing to do with any/everything prior, except perhaps to contradict it. this is what anyone got for Staying In Line like superior winners. the autistic [annoying arrogant inferior undeserving etc] Out Of Lineness that would be so supposedly admired instead seen as pure Other shit that's projected upon ppl so as to Reject it thusly. couldn't be me!! i'm a winner who will always have Superior ranking in the hierarchy & treated accordingly!!! i Must be!!!! like i must Kill people who seem to be disrupting this, even by acting like a person who assumes they're equal to me despite being Different. there all along like wow winston existing Out Of Line is so powerful. he can harmonize with & support taylor so well b/c they're introduced as being so Out Of Line, up to the inevitable point of breaking out & starting their own thing entirely!!! but while it's like, okay yeah, you Have to reel them back in by thwarting them b/c otherwise they break so far from central men's orbit they exit the series or you have to put Them at the center (imagine...) (plus! the role winston plays in them getting as close to this as they ever can be!) but then in the end taylor's just shortchanged b/c when it comes time to take down a central man as thee main thing all season, series finale style, they should be knocking it out in a few episodes with sacker & philip. instead we focus on wendy given the helm & fucking around all season. after disposing of winston b/c who even needs him for anything, this is Stay In Line times, and to do that we can do nothing w/autistic people but hate them & punish them for being undeserving. but don't worry b/c he doesn't get to be so Out Of Line as to easily cause problems for them & thwart them, b/c he just doesn't. taylor waits around on wendy & tells her she's the best b/c they just do. we are all in line on all of this ourselves so whew, there's no Disruption to notice if that key Alignment is maintained. rian was never holding herself Above winston if we just really tentatively suggest she doesn't think that she was, while letting every double standard at play be acted out. rian being "out of line" was that she wasn't being aggressive enough about any of her Superiority, b/c if you didn't leave bruising then nothing was That Bad; cue the assaults and boundary violations Reserved for the inferior losers as fun times & nothing anyone is beholden to with Consequences, we don't even make the viewer stick with the consequences of how it affects the target a second too long, lest you start to think it's Drama & not Jokes.
anyways it's all about the [categorization as inferior Other based on an assumed Hierarchy = inherently defined as Out Of Line] all "why get a formal diagnosis from a professional who doesn't know what to look for when at age 5 my peers went 'something's wrong with this one' & acted 'accordingly'" like even when people "know" what's Wrong with someone to make them the odd one out / "incompatible" w/what makes others exist Right, it's time to interpret everything else about them as "backing that up" no matter what, certainly no matter if it involves theoretically Valued concepts, b/c it's all first & foremost Staying In Line with the hierarchy, where the correct way to do things is: if you Can push someone else into greater vulnerability while you're established as Insulated, you Do. tl;dr winston inherently continuously Out Of Line; being "superior" requires an ultimate (&/or also quite Immediate. especially when it comes to "simple" matters already "correctly" arranged in the supposed Objective Hierarchy, like: winston's "objectively" inferiority (autistic swag)) Staying In Line. and what comes of it. all the most engaging & complex shit when people get to not actually stay in line. the power of it if taylor & tmc & allies didn't have to ultimately be shoved into Staying In Line even when it means wendy is the best & oh who cares about taylor & philip when wags is around etc etc. if winston being someone Out Of Line was seen as relevant & not an easy nonstop joke. while a quant who is so In Line as to correctly personally abuse him even more than others are doing is so ""out of line"" as to decide she's already gotten everything she wants & may as well live the dream now, b/c she's not an aggressive man, one has to suppose, same diff as wendy getting to believe she's Better than everyone & is nobly in charge of orchestrating their fates when she Means & Knows so well, & is somehow pitted against prince being this same figure but without having to confront that fact. he's mean! or whatever. he's talking about killing people & wendy isn't so that sorts it out forever. "abuse your local autists; it's funny & their fault & consequenceless b/c they're not real people" is also harmonious with all our ideas. edgy rulebreaking bold independent Out of Line heroes completely in accord w/the established hierarchies. & those whose existence threatening peership disrupts it who are written off losers who could never upend those heroes' goings on. everyone Actually being peers is unimagineable, not as a figure of speech. we do not imagine it, what are you even talking about. now for the Merited Hierarchy to be acted out as arranged, which is fun, god i wish that were me. Independent Agents ascending it only!! & people who Cheat to get in like loser nerds w/their math, b/c they can't Deserve it. now to keep insisting that everyone else could just be On My Level if they tried, while also responding violently if it seems like weirdos / ppl who aren't Supposed to be here are infringing on my level (the only violence is physical strikes that made contact, & perhaps killed you)
anyways just another installment of [fake fans haunted by billions, & other things which are in real life, such as the fictional series billions] musings i have to excise at all b/c [this was take 4]. winston Out Of Line. superior correct winners who have to Stay In Line at related great costs despite the supposed associated wins of that. his autistic swag. knowing ppl Are different autism style b/c they're "out of line." encountering irl autistic people without realizing it & repeatedly writing "this nerd guy is just So annoying ugh!! he's just like weird & doing everything wrong for no reason & won't just Be Normal or Shut Up & Go Away!! but at least his intractible arrogant cluelessness also means we have fun punishing & taking advantage of him" Type butt of jokes into things. those cringe loser Insistently Annoying Weirdo nerds who we all find insufferable & punish, we all know them, inherent Inferior Other Out Of Line that they are. now it's a Guy we all hate & enjoy seeing suffer & Understand as a less deserving less [person] just dropped into the periphery of this fiction. he will easily be thwarted from an alliance with the [person designed to be Out of Line in a way that Is considered Legitimate] that would let them shatter the limits of the series in 5 sec which we're also holding them back by the scruff of the neck to prevent anyways while pushing forward ppl supposed to be even More correct b/c uh um they're a little more Normal, & perhaps even Women, who are innately more caring & gentle. there they go hurting those around them as much as they can, with nothing stopping them at all, but they're using their inside voices & not issuing physical threats so that's what i'm talking about. that is heroic, vs the villainous efforts to navigate life as though everyone will respect them as a fellow person which Autists egregiously pull, to which you can do anything you want to Reject this. maybe even decide you wanna personally use them. isn't that nice of you. no, we don't know what to do with the "this guy won't stop acting like he gets to think he's a person" but eventually send him away after the dozen trampled boundaries to punish him for fun b/c what else was the point of him? anyways don't worry i saw the autistic swag. the nonbinary swag it didn't even know was there. the nonbinary swag it knew was there but held back by the scruff of the neck b/c all billions' most engaging, potential filled characters are the ones Held Back b/c they're threatening too much [out of line] / their out of Lineness must be contained; vs everyone perfectly in line who keeps being pushed in front of them no matter what b/c uhhh.
let's go Out of Line gang. continual inevitable Disruption of the norm(tm). like even just standing there vs "oh immediately i fucking Hate this guy." billions where anyone considers winston for 5 sec would also shatter apart. taylor would be too powerful even more than they already are if they didn't have to stay wendy's sidekick no matter what. rian who didn't have to come back from the hiatus even more "right" than they presumably intended her to always be (bound to thee hierachy / actually always Staying In Line. if she's out of it, psych, actually that was just a correction of the "objective" hierarchal order waiting to reconfigure itself around the situation). standing around waiting like okay but the payoff that Could happen....okay still time though lol....well here we are
the fundamentalness of the Out Of Lineness. quantessential....send post
#another [mentally pacing while writing out the saga] moment#winston billions#it's all about the Out Of Line....#b/c it's all about the hierarchy; & the fact that it's People beneath you = forever being in conflict w/Reality being ''out of line''#this person talking & taking up space & breathing & Appearing & Behaving & Acting & [Autonomous]ing....no. no!!!!!!!#tmc just so happened to be Weird except also mafee is there but he's too not ''aggressive'' enough for axe cap. or is he!! not that much#all while even in peak tmc times....thee hierarchy! we Hate winston & Will all act accordingly to keep him inferior(tm)#we'll also use him. but not include him as a peer when we can help it. or even acknowledge a ''value'' for having found him Useful(tm)#just like wow really didn't think at all about winston besides [he IS out of line!!!]. ppl can do all That to him & not have it questioned#like hey so long as maybe you do it without....well they did also physically assault him in the end so really no limits obviously#the make or break context? his autistacity means well he deserves it from anyone#whereas if some of those ppl do some of those things to Winners w/the same goal to punish & hurt & coerce? hmm bit messed up#it's not double standards when you objectively buy into it right. if winston was a Good Enough Real Enough person we'd all Love him#however we just all immediately recognize a weird little autistic loser & that's all that is relevant forever somehow! hmm!#most ''out of line'' billions characters unleashed....we deserved this#what a coincidence that at the high points of this; like say; Kompenso; winston is treated the best!! 4x12!! Hmm!!!#irrelevant i said. nothing to see here like there's nothing inside him but Cringe Wrongness. scene over! series over! autists are Others#they power down in nooks & crannies & stop imitating Real People words & deeds when we're not looking so just do whatever#that Whatever means finding it rewarding to go after them & assert power=superior status over them? epic Normal shit. what else is there#rhetorical!! stop answering about like ''nobody's life & existence treated as Less''#but at what cost? oh so a really epic man can't like pwn people now?? perhaps an epic Woman? all cishet agenda style btw? hell
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SAY. IT. LOUDER. FOR. THE. PEOPLE. IN. THE. BACK!!!!! (rant in tags if anyone wants to look at that)
ok quick rant post.
*HUGE TOA SPOILERS BELOW*
i just saw somebody say jason’s death was poorly written.
i mean this in the most respect way to those people saying that jason’s death was meaningless and careless…did we read the same book?
first of all, it was not anticlimactic. It would’ve been unexpected for me if i wasn’t spoiled. he quite literally went out with a bang. he made a gigantic tornado/storm to pretty much single-handedly fight an emperor. i mean, no one around him was equipped or ready to fight. he was doing so good, but he knew he had to die anyway. he might’ve tried harder if he hadn’t heard the prophecy about him or piper dying. my point is, he did not seem “nerfed” or “not powerful”, apollo was really impressed by his skills in his narration.
i saw somebody say they didn’t it like it because he had so much potential. that’s the whole point though!!! many tragic deaths are brought to life by an unkept promise or something they couldn’t carry out before they died. all of jason’s storylines were going to lead him somewhere great, but of course it couldn’t go like that. rick riordan pretty much put in that whole part with apollo and jason talking about his promise to the minor gods to dangle that in front of us. to emphasize how tragic his death was.
people say his death was only for apollo/lester’s character development? i don’t agree. i mean, yeah, that was a huge thing that came from it. throughout the rest of the books, he tributes his growth and actions to jason. but i don’t think that was the only reason for it. i saw a great post by @a-cup-of-coffee-and-the-moon about this. go check it out here, but basically they say that was it inevitable (they go to say it was because he went against zeus, and the greek leaders had a history of their sons overthrowing them). even other than that, it developed the storyline and the whole trials of apollo series in general.
ok so maybe that wasn’t quick. but still. i hope i proved my point. i am a huge jason defender and i just hate when people comment on his death like this. he’s dead, guys!!! that’s just like pooping on his grave! ok, but seriously, we need to end the jason death slander. i feel like some people see something they don’t like and come up with reasons as to why it shouldn’t have happened and why it was weird that it did. i mean, yeah, i didn't want him to die, but i’m willing to accept it and respect him.
#like YES#I hate hate hate HATE!!!#when people say#“Jason's death was only for Apollo's character development!!”#like soemtimes I GENUINELY think we didn't read the same books#because fym??#like yeah#it had a hand in it!#of course it did#its DEATH#but that wasn't the SOLE PURPOSE!!#HE DIED#FOR THE#P R O P H E C Y#!!!!!#and I don't understand how people don't get that!#like#did you think Leo was gonna be able#to try to trick FATE?#hell no!#the chance that the fates are gonna let that slide?#BELOW ZERO!#they OBVIOUSLY aren't gonna be happy#so -heres for you valgrace shippers- they take something that's dear to him!#aka;#JASON!#so obviously Jason's gonna die!#it was INEVITABLE#I hit the tag limit mb g
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✦ FLOWER POWER, C. SAINZ
everyone knows that carlos is not the type of person who likes flowers. of course everyone also knows that dislike will turn into the opposite, just like him with flowers.
₊˚⊹౨ৎ ⋆。✦˚
HIS QNA OVER TIME, SAME TOPIC:
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yourusername Sunday 💮
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username Carlos you can run but you can't hide
username i mean i understand why's he liking this tho... her bouquet collection are PERFECT
username This is the type of thing that I need to see in the morning
username I'm convinced that Carlos is just pretending to be a flower hater. Because who hates flowers?
username The wall he had created for them poor flowers are finally collapsed because of her
username SHE BROKE CARLOS'S ACTING?
username okay fight me, but i definitely understand on why is he even breaking his character
username I'll fight you because idk what is he looking in these posts
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yourusername
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yourusername Another collection, and it's STUNNING!
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username YESS GIVE US YOUR TOP ANGLE WITH THOSE FLOWERS TO US
username Now I wonder who's giving her those flowers...
username @mileycyrus Definitely oml 🙄🙄🙄
username no but for real it is stunning
carlossainz55 💐
charles_leclerc It's her second post about his bouquets and he's already got down this bad
username THE WHAT????!!!!?!?!?!11?1!
username He cannot say sike here I'm afraid
username He can't because he's blindly in love with her
username the power she held over him is so strong, he forgets about his whole dislike about this plant
yourusername
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yourusername Flower power!
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landonorris thanks to your power to break down all of his fakeness that has lasted for 4 years 😒😒 too bad that i bought it
carlossainz55 Everyone has their secret, but for this one is different
landonorris yeah keep lying to us cheater
carlossainz55 WHAT ARE YOU CALLING ME CHEATER FOR
robertomerhi I thought that this could never be discovered, but I guess you uncovered it yourself 🤣
carlossainz55 Why are you guys turning against me now
username idk guys but i guess y/n is the fourth person here
username she's so cute omg, i've never seen her full face this year
username CARLOS CAN YOU FIGHT?
username flower lover gf 🤝 flower hater bf
username forget him i want a flower lover gf too
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carlossainz55 Monday morning activities 🌄🌞💐
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username IT'S REAL?????😨😨😨😨😨😨
username What kind witchcraft did she use to make him like flower again?
username AGAIN?
username I need her ig user
username @yourusername
georgerussell63 I feel something was not quite right here...
alex_albon Yeah, me too 🤨🤨🤨
username IVE BEEN WAITED FOR THIS
username next time, she'll convince him to open a flower shop in italy
maxverstappen1 I didn't know that you liked flower, you told me that you hated it until that time one time you didn't even enters the room because there's lavender in it.
kellypiquet Love can make it all disappears 😌
danielricciardo Wait, I didn't know that
yourusername added a photo to their story! · 14m
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taglist: @queenofmanydreams @muglermami @4limq @avengers-assemble123456 @cabbyhabs @meowtastick @4mula-1 @miarabanana @amel1ee @dinosushilun1 @auggieblogs @namgification @charli123456789 @cherry-piee
#✶!#carlos sainz x reader#carlos sainz x female reader#carlos sainz smau#carlos sainz x you#carlos sainz x y/n#carlos sainz imagine#carlos sainz fluff#carlos sainz fic#carlos sainz fanfic#f1 fluff#f1 fic#f1 imagines#f1 imagine#f1 fanfic#f1 x reader#f1 x female reader#f1 x y/n#f1 x you#f1 smau#f1 instagram au#carlos sainz instagram au#carlos sainz
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AAAAAOMG UR TWST OC IS SO ADORABLE?? i'm absolutely in love with eden sm (+ his design?? the star eyes and the wings are my favorite,, i wanna smooch all his tattoos!) and i hope it's okay to ask a few questions about him... (I KNOW U SAID IT WAS OKAY BUT I JUST WANTED TO MAKE SURE 😭 i'm genuinely interested in knowing more!)
1) does he have anyone in the twst cast that he tolerates/likes? i know he's part of the whole harem thing but is there anyone he doesn't necessarily mind being around (or even sharing with the prefect?)
2) do grim and eden have a good relationship? i would assume so since they're living both with one another but do they just get along with each other for the prefect's sake or are they actually best buds? (๑ > ᴗ < ๑)
(little dumb idea but i think it would be so cute if the prefect treated the two as if they were all like a little family! eden and prefect being the two parents and grim their rambunctious kid lmao,, i would imagine the others not being so happy about it (っ‘ω`c))
3) is he okay with physical affection/pda? is he totally chill about it or would he rather shy about the whole thing? is he open to having the prefect touch his wings or his tattoos?
4) oooo any funfacts that you have about the new ramshackle resident?? just in general really if that's okay with u ofc!! ☆
aa okay that's it!! i hope my questions weren't annoying or anything! (っ‘ω`c)
Had to get one of those wheels ive seen going around where you put the oc and how they feel about the character and how the characters feel back about them, but with a twist lol (most of them are haters).
The ones he are most tolerant with are grim, ace, deuce, jack and kalim. Only one he could possible share with would either be kalim, jack or deuce, because of how he sorta is annoyed by ace.
Of course cant forget how he feels about you :) he thinks you are very very very special and he loves you a lot <3
He likes grim a lot, seeing as grim isn't one of the students that is oh so annoying. He warms up to the monster, seeing how gently you take care of grim, wanting to do the same. It feels, domestic, in his opinion.
Grim likes Eden a lot too, he has never belittled him, he has always made sure to feed grim along with Eden being very warm (and therefore very nice to sleep on). In grims opinion, he thinks you should go with Eden, cuz he is a good candidate for marriage (grim has been bribed with love, affection, and tuna).
He takes good care of the cat son, making sure he is healthy and happy.
Now onto pda. Eden are only okay with you touching the wings, the tattoo and the core, being as they are quite sensitive. The scar is still off limits, but maybe if you make him warm up to you even more you might be able to-
He loves when you help him with his wings, it's one of the best feelings out there. Fo mind that only you (and grim) can touch the wings, anyone else is off limits, ESPECIALLY ROOK HE IS FORBIDDEN TO TOUCH THEM.
Eden facts!! He has lil "ear-holes" like birds, just behind the feathers. Be careful around that part when you help him with his feathers, otherwise you might have a pouty and angry Eden on tour hands.
His eyes also glow in the dark! It's the scariest during the nightly snack runs down to the kitchen, seeing him suddenly stare at you, but you slowly get used to it!
You don't know where the extra eyes sometimes come from tho...
Also some general facts about Eden!
Dorm: Ramshackle
Birthday: 1/1
Age: ???
Height: 185cm
Fav subject: alchemy
Hobby: cleaning in ramshackle, birdwatching
Likes: you
Dislikes: Loud noises, blond 3rd year hunters named rook hunt, people trying to grab onto his wings that aren't you
Fav food: he don't need to eat to gain sustenance, bur he likes mashed potatoes with gravy
Least fav food: soup, any soup, he hates it
Btw if anyone were to write for Eden I would explode it would mean the world to me
#yandere twst#yandere twisted wonderland#yandere twst art#yandere twisted wonderland art#yandere oc#yandere twst oc#my oc eden
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i like how falin being a maiden to be saved, a reward to be coveted, isn't a point to criticize in dungeon meshi. because we have various other female characters who are written as having their own agency
we have marcille, of course, whose story can be observed since chapter 1. how she's not depicted as the "girl team member" but "part of the team". when you're writing a protagonist group where there's only one female character among the male cast, you can always feel this sense of alienation in the writing, like she doesn't belong in the group as the story focuses on the rest of the boys. the way masashi kishimoto writes team 7 is a major example
but marcille is still allowed to be a "typical girl" who doesn't want to eat gross things and enjoy feminine clothing without forgetting the fact that she's a multifaceted person. she's a researcher who isn't afraid to get dirty when it's something relevant to magic and her goal, even though she's also grossed out at the idea of feces being used as fertilizer for crops
and when falin comes back as a monster who can't speak, it's still not a point to criticize. oftentimes stories involving female characters losing their speech (or, well, becoming disabled in some way) is meant to make her vulnerable, a fragile 'something' to be protected. but this is not an argument about how chimera falin is super strong, because that's a shallow way of thinking that ignores the fact that being a Girlboss doesn't ensure your female character is written as a fully realized person. this is about the fact that almost right after that Izutsumi joins Laios' party.
She joins late in the game, so it'll be easy for her to only be tacked on as an afterthought. A notable example would be Okumura Haru from Persona 5, where her character gets overshadowed a lot by the other party members' more colorful personalities, as if the writer wasn't sure how to integrate her into the already developed dynamic.
there's also how she's written as a sweet and shy girl yet the way her school uniform is designed betrays that image. it's heavily customized even compared to the trendy girl like ann which means it's impossible for her outfit to not go against school regulation. not something an obedient girl would have done. which makes me wonder if they couldn't decide on her writing until last minute.
but Izutsumi is different. her involvement and her own personal story arc eventually intertwines to the overarching plot. she hates having her options limited. she hates having responsibilities to uphold. she hates eating veggies! she hates that people expects her to do things their way! she wants freedom to do whatever she wants!
but in the end she learns that to have the freedom to choose, she has to uphold her responsibilities. starting from the simple things like taking care of her health by eating balanced meals, not just the ones she enjoy. she has to do work to get enough money for her food and travels. and she has to learn how society works so she can live independently. she has to learn which desire she has to prioritize that she can balance out with her responsibility as a living being.
her own self-realization culminates into her giving advice to laios that leads to him steeling his resolves to become king.
so you have Falin, who gets turned into a monster that cant communicate her desire and needs while under the mad sorcerer's control, and in exchange you get Izutsumi, the 'beastman' who knows exactly what she wants and throws a tantrum about it without shame, not understanding that what you want isn't always what you need. i think it's a really cool parallel!
this is a prime example of how tropes that get associated with misogynistic writing can be used as a proper tool that serves a narrative when you have more than multiple female characters having their own character arcs
in fact, you can apply this to pretty much every other things. when you're writing gay characters, having only one of them and they act camp can make people raise an eyebrow at whether this is meant to be a caricature of gay people or not. having two of them and one acts camp and one acts normie can be read as a bias against gay people expressing themselves. writing multiple gay characters, all with different personalities and desires will avoid accidental stereotyping.
even the minor female characters, be it the canaries or namari, help show that the way the narrative treats Falin isn't born from thinking that women are an alien breed compared to men. that her lack of agency means something for the themes involved.
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Gege is doing to his characters what they did to jfk there's so much character assassination happening djsjdsnsdjn
This ask was sent to me shortly after I complained about JJK 269 leaks. (Aka before JJK 270's release so be nice to them.) And while I still agree that chapter contained character assassinations, JJK 270 has given me a good reason for them.
Since my other post related to this topic was trimmed down by Tumblr’s 30 image limit, I’m going to use this ask as an excuse to this burning question...
Why does everyone feel so out of character in JJK 268–270?
Notes before we start.
1) Read the light novels. They are the equivalent of Bleach's CFYOW for JJK. There is a fan translation (Book 1 & Book 2), but I will be citing the official translation from my own copies.
2) I will be mainly using the TCB scans for the manga because of their accessibility.
4) Written as of JJK 270.
5) Read the light novels.
(Another extremely 'hear me out' discussion under the cut. Click pictures for captions/citations.)
Preface
This post is banking on the framework I set up in the previous related post so please read/skim over it. (If you don't? Just hear me out!)
Short Summary of the Previous Related Post:
Yuji is projecting a massive delusion onto Megumi that gives him a happy ending. JJK 268–270 is a mesh of Yuji and Megumi’s memories and dreams that serve to rationalize all that’s happened to them in a way that allows them to forgive themselves. Sukuna’s vessel memories are probably mixed in too.
Because of this I’m assuming the following:
>The battle recollection in JJK 269 is Yuji constructing explanations from his, Megumi, and Sukuna’s memories during their battle. Neither of these 3 ever knew the plan in full. This can explain why so much of the battle recollection is wrong.
>The characters we see outside of Yuji and Megumi are constructs based on their memories of these people. They’re more like representations than the actual characters.
I don’t know if it means they’re dead or not, but that doesn’t matter. I want to explore the way the characters feel off can be explained by them being memory constructs.
In the previous post, I used "Without love it cannot be seen." from Umineko to give my best faith reading of these past 3 chapters I've hated so much. This time the tool I'll be using is:
"Flipping over the chessboard."
This refers to how one should try to see things from a different perspective.
Memory in JJK
A neat touch that has always been around in JJK is characters remembering others as they last saw them. When Gojo recalls his best students, Hakari has a very different hair style from when we meet him. His recollection of Yuta's is accurate though. When Panda recalls Yuta, the hairstyle differs from what Gojo recalls. And when he recalls Kiara, he mistakenly refers to her as a guy.
This all can be explained by considering when Gojo and Panda last saw these characters. Gojo last saw Yuta in Kenya with Miguel where he changed his hairstyle. Panda hasn't seen Yuta since he's left the country. Neither Gojo or Panda have seen Hakari and Kiara for a very long time.
Their memories reflect how they last knew them. Kiara is a whole girl now and Hakari is blond. But if Panda and Gojo never saw them again? Those memories would be true to them, even if it’s no longer accurate.
And sometimes the memories aren’t accurate. See this side by side recollection of Gojo meeting Megumi from both of their perspectives.
I believe Gojo’s memory of this event is the accurate one because he’s 19 when it happens, not under distress when he recalls it, and has the Six Eyes which act like a supercomputer. Megumi’s memory is iffy because he’s 6 when it happens, has a head injury that knocks him out when he recalls this, and doesn’t have perception enhancing abilities. And though Megumi can’t recall the memory in its truest form, what he does remember still tells us a lot about his feelings towards the event and his relationship with Gojo.
The emotions child Megumi felt at the time distort what Gojo was actually like back then. Instead of a benefactor, he’s a suspicious weirdo with a funny face. The heart behind Gojo crouching down to his level, being way too honest with him, trying to give him options, patting him on the head—it’s all missing.
With all this in mind, I don’t think it’s unreasonable to assume Megumi and Yuji’s impressions of other characters via memory would influence how they appear in these delusions too. Yuji’s impressions probably take the most precedence since I think his will is shaping the delusions the most.
Recalling Incomplete Information
Yuji is very good at understanding people. He can intuit their feelings and sync up with them easily. (I go over this in greater detail in this post.) But that doesn’t mean he fully understands their hearts. He gets close enough to their core to bond with them, but the little details aren’t quite right.
If all the characters (save Megumi) we’ve been seeing in JJK 268–270 are constructs based on Yuji’s perception of them, I think this can explain everything off about them.
What made me consider this possibility was JJK 270. There’s this pattern I keep seeing... Characters’ motivations being misunderstood and being resolved by scenarios that aren’t quite right. Every time I try to explain what exactly is wrong with them, assuming their inconsistencies align with Yuji’s perception of them solves the problem.
Amai Rin
Rin is introduced as a coward. He’s unable to fight and goes along with the whims of those stronger than him to avoid getting hurt. This is why he keeps his head low as his friend is being harassed by bullies during his Jr. High days. Still, he tries to help. Just not at a risk to himself.
When Yuji saves his friend and beats all the bullies up, he turns to Rin and assumes he was part of the bully group. This simply isn’t true. He was a bystander. That’s why it’s weird for him to apologize like he was the one who beat the guy up.
Yuji’s false impression of Rin, one where he’s a bully that feels guilt over his actions, explains this. Rin’s actual guilt comes from him being a bystander—someone who doesn’t take action for others when something is wrong. He dealt with that in the Culling Games by helping Yuji and risking his life to save Angel. And he really stepped out of his comfort zone to join the medical team for the Sukuna battle. He might be the reason Yuta survived. (Yuji doesn’t know about that though.)
And what’s this? Here Yuji outright admits he doesn’t fully understand what kind of person Rin is. All he knows is that he did some good things and is trying to become a better person. So now we’ve got this other Rin that’s apologizing for something he didn’t do for the redemption he’s already earned.
(And that’s the pattern! Rin’s motivation is misunderstood by Yuji so he’s doing something that seems out of character to us readers, but is perfectly in character for Yuji’s perception of him. When I apply it to everyone else. Everything makes sense.)
Takaba Fumihiko
What Yuji knows about Takaba is pre-Kenjaku development. Yuji knows the Takaba that speaks over others, rejects their criticisms, and insists he’s funny. That’s kind of what he’s doing to Totally Not Kenjaku. In reality, Kenjaku caused Takaba to reflect on his approach to comedy and they are nearly in perfect sync by the end of it. Kenjaku satisfied Takaba.
Yuji didn’t see that battle and he hasn’t spoken to Takaba since. So he’s constructed a happy ending where Takaba has found his partner and is working towards the show of his dreams that already happened.
I also want to note that Takaba is 100% ok with sex jokes. Kenjaku makes one and he doesn’t object to it. This is just another little detail that makes everything so slightly off.
Higuruma Hiromi
Yuji knows that Higurama wants to go back to his roots. He knows that he feels guilt over killing people.
What he doesn’t know is that Higurama’s roots are him being a defense lawyer that cherishes the flaws of humanity. He doesn't want to ever look away from the impurities that even Yuji has. That’s why I think Yuji resolves his problems with him becoming a sorcerer who saves lives.
Yuji seems to think that Higuruma is like him. He’ll make up for the lives he’s taken via sorcery by saving more. That’s something he could assume from their convo, but that’s not actually what Higuruma wants. He wants to fundamentally change Japan’s legal system for the better in his own way.
Kurusu Hana
She’s the most in character of the bunch. In fact, there’s nothing out of character about her interaction with Megumi. What she represents is Yuji misunderstanding Megumi’s desires.
Yuji understands that Megumi’s type is someone with an unwavering humanity (literally the definition of Yuji’s name) via access to his memories. But for some reason (he’s kind of dumb academically), he thinks this means Hana is perfect for him.
I think this is because Hana meets Yuji’s definition of a good person. She’s just like Megumi. She saves others for a selfish purpose. And that means…Hana does not meet Megumi’s definition of a good person. Not once has he considered her saving others as selfless. (...But Yuji has.)
And that’s just facts. Hana is kind of unhinged. She’s extremely possessive of Megumi and saves others solely to win him over. Yuji saves others because it’s the right thing to do.
Megumi’s preferences are Yuji, not Hana. Which has led to the most awkward confession and rejection scene. That might have clued Yuji in to construct an alternative. In the memory Yuji is probably recalling, Todo does clock Megumi as someone into dudes. …The very next scene is Yuji hitting on a dude in front of his gf in a way that causes him to blush. (Yuji has not once complimented someone’s body up to this point if I recall correctly. And he’s been around some beefy dudes.)
(Yeah Nobara me too. Second most leftfield possible bisexual confirmation I’ve read in a manga. The first will always be from Baki the Grappler.)
Is this Yuji letting Megumi know it’s ok to come onto him? Is he not initiating because Hana’s forwardness freaked Megumi out? It’s possible.
What this suggests is that Yuji is kind of fine tuning this whole delusion to make Megumi as content as possible. It’s telling that the moment Megumi starts getting super uncomfortable the scene jumps to something else.
It happens at the beginning of the chapter too. Gojo is mentioned by Shoko in a way that causes Megumi to pause. And Bam! Change scene.
Anyways, I hope this demonstrates that Yuji working with the limited information from memories is most likely the reason for everything being so funky. It’s character assassination by accident.
Why make these happy endings when this is all for Megumi?
Two reasons as to why I think Yuji is trying to give everyone a plausible happy ending.
1) He genuinely wants them to live good lives.
2) It has to be believable for Megumi to accept them as real and forgive himself.
This line may have been about Yuji, but Megumi’s not any different. He blames himself in the exact same way Yuji blames himself.
I also think there's something to be said about Yuji crafting a dream that resembles the perfect cookie cutter Shonen ending. The guy gets with girl he has no chemistry with. All these complicated plot lines are wrapped up with a neat little bow. Everyone lives and goes on like nothing traumatic happened.
Yuji is a big fan of Shonen. Straight up his final move against Sukuna is a Hunter X Hunter reference. That's not just Gege doing a reference as a fan, Yuji himself is a fan of that manga.
I think Yuji is trying to make this fiction a reality because it's the only way he knows how to cope with his trauma.
JJK 269’s Character “Assassinations”
I promise I still hate this chapter. But I won’t deny how fun it is to pretend these are all delusions Yuji created for Megumi’s sake. I went over Kusakabe to cut him some slack in the previous post, so let’s do everyone else.
(The chapter’s formatting as one long unending nightmare makes it hard to separate this stuff out by the character. I’m just going to do groups this time.)
The 2nd Years
The most common complaint from readers outside of Kusakabe telling Yuji he should’ve died is Maki being really fudging mean to Yuta. Maki is mean, but she’s not that mean. You could assume this is her showing Yuta she cares and that her anger scales with worry but… Here’s a side by side comparison of her getting angry over Yuta risking his life in Vol 0 vs JJK 269.
Pretty big difference I think. Here is a Maki with a Yuta she thinks is about to die vs a Maki with a Yuta who is 100% ok. And the only reason she even gets mad in Vol 0 is because she had no idea Yuta did something that risky. Maki already knew Yuta was going to body hop if all else failed, so her reaction here is disproportionate, especially since he survived.
Speaking of survival, the first thing Maki, Panda, and Inumaki do when Yuta survives in Vol 0 is ask if he’s ok and thank him for saving them. This doesn’t happen in JJK 269. They're all very protective of Yuta after the events of Vol 0. We see them defend him from Gojo for being a little mean about his training. They’re all against the plan because of how much they value him. The 3 of them not checking in on Yuta immediately after the fact is wildly OOC.
The explanation I have? This version of Maki is based on Yuji and Megumi’s memories of her. (And let’s remember that Megumi claims he can’t openly respect her and the other 2nd years outside of Yuta.) When Megumi and Nobara mourn Yuji’s “death”, Maki does this to them.
Maki also intimidated Yuji pretty bad when they first met. Her, Panda, and Inumaki went along with bullying Yuji after he came back to life. It makes sense that Yuji would up Maki’s meanness. He’s not been around her long enough to know she’s not like this when it comes to people she cares about.
I do think it is weird Maki is pre-awakening levels of mean. This could also be Yuji trying to return to the time before everything went to absolute hell. Or...because she’s Yuji’s construct, this could be him expressing his anger at Yuta for defiling Gojo’s body in a very roundabout way. From both Yuji and Megumi’s perspective, Yuta didn’t discuss this beforehand and used it as a last second plan. And that’s kind of how the conversation goes. Everyone talks about Yuta’s Yujo plan like he didn’t clear it with them first.
It’s also telling that they harp on Yuta over Miguel and Larue. Miguel said no help unless Sukuna’s domain was down. Everyone except Yuji knew that. There was never a scenario where they’d help from the start. But to Yuji who only heard they might show up? It’s a missed opportunity.
Say if you were, trying to find a reason for such a horrific defiling of a loved one’s body. Wouldn’t you try to reconstruct the crime by considering the motives and methods? That would help give you some closure, right?
I think that’s what Yuji is doing for himself and Megumi. Yuji is trying to figure out why things went the way they did through a blend of what Sukuna intuited and what makes the most sense to someone who never had full knowledge of the plan.
And if you think about it, this is still a happy ending for them. They’re all absolved of their guilt surrounding the outcome of the battle. Even if they screwed up, they’re all still alive and able to move forward in a better world. They did the best they could, so it’s time to move on from what happened to Gojo. Thinking about that too much would break someone.
Mei Mei and Ui Ui
Mei Mei is out of character in a way that’s unique compared to everyone else. She’s still herself, but with less…yikes. It’s odd since Yuji has seen how awful Mei Mei can be and is deeply uncomfortable with how she treats Ui Ui. He’s not missing information about her motives so why have we gone from this to this?
I propose this is an extension of Yuji’s denialism. (We’ve seen how avoidant he is with Gojo’s death.) Mei Mei is grooming Ui Ui and has made it clear this is all for money. Ui Ui is being abused, but he’s so attached to his abuser that separation would break him. How do you make a happy ending out of that?
Well, you can soften those edges. Spin a tale where Mei Mei is an over-doting sister who would kill for her cute little brother. She doesn’t touch him inappropriately, she just plays with him. She loves money as much as him! No abuse here! She’s not someone who would kill a child for cash.
And in a weird way this whole Simple Domain debacle mirrors Gojo killing the higher ups. If Maki is Yuji's rage towards the Yujo plan, then this could be him trying to process his mentor slaughtering a bunch of old people in mass for his sake.
It probably helps that Yuji wasn’t there to see Mei Mei tell Ui Ui to die for her. There’s no way he knows she was paid to help kill him either.
Mei Mei doesn’t care about the well-being of other people. She’s just a hardcore capitalist who loves money and will do anything for it. But this version of her can be less terrible to Ui Ui while still getting her cash and that’s sort of ok I guess? Yuji has moved on from this and so will I.
The Megumi & Nobara Problem
The 1st years going on like nothing happened after Sukuna has made readers feel betrayed. It flies in the face of everything that’s been established for them when it comes to mourning.
As stated in CFYOW, JJK Thorny Road at Dawn, Chapter 5: At the End of a Sidewalk, this is how the trio deals with grief.
Despite knowing Yuji for only 2 weeks his death screws with Megumi and Nobara pretty badly. In the manga, it looks like Nobara is more upset because she’s visibly in pain, but I think the light novels show they’re equally shaken.
This is why the non-reaction to Gojo’s death makes no sense. Megumi has known Gojo for a decade. He’s 6 when he first meets him and 16 when he dies because Sukuna used his Cursed Technique (CT). Nobara knew Yuji for 2 weeks, and didn’t see him for another 3 months. In all that time, Gojo was her teacher. She knew him longer than Yuji. When she “dies” Gojo is on the same tier as Yuji and Megumi to her.
So why is it that in JJK 268, Nobara thinks of Gojo as a creep? Why did she toss his letter despite him being one of the people she thought of in death?
Well… When Yuji came back from the dead via Gojo’s prank he heard Nobara say this.
Nobara is prone to saying out of pocket nonsense to people. If she thinks it, she says it. Yuji also doesn’t understand Nobara’s thought processes (Just like Amai Rin he admits it too!). Nobara tries to hide her feelings to appear tougher than she is sometimes. So I think Yuji has done to Nobara what he has done to Maki—upped the meanness and neglected the heart.
And though Nobara being a construct can explain her behavior, this still leaves us with Megumi who is definitely not one. Why is he acting like Gojo meant nothing to him?
Megumi in particular is super fragile when it comes to his feelings. This is how stressed he gets when he learns exactly why Tsumiki is in a coma.
She’s not even dead and he’s halfway to a mental breakdown. The idea that he can just look at her grave once after having a hand in her murder and move on this quickly makes no sense. Inadvertently killing his defacto guardian he’s been raised by for 10 years should be upsetting him to a similar degree. (Maki said Gojo treated him like a precious treasure!)
When Megumi is on the verge of death he thinks of Tsumiki, Yuji, and or Gojo. It’s always at least 1 of those 3. There’s no way Gojo dying and having his corpse reanimated for reasons Megumi might feel responsible for isn’t screwing him up.
Unless…Yuji is suppressing his memory on purpose. He can’t even cope with what happened to Gojo, how is Megumi supposed to? How can either of them forgive themselves for that if they acknowledge it in full?
When Sukuna tries to tell Megumi to give up, he looks miserable. Every time Sukuna has verbally kicked Yuji while he’s down, he’s done it with a big old smile and laugh. He doesn’t hold back and goes for the throat.
Sukuna is being very nice to Megumi here when he doesn’t mention Gojo at all. The only death he blames on Megumi is Tsumiki. Everyone else? Nothing. That’s weird given that Sukuna will pass the blame of his kills onto Yuji to torment him.
Is this Sukuna a construct or is he playing nice because he respects Megumi? Who knows. Whatever happened here seems to point to Gojo’s memory being suppressed for Megumi’s sake.
And why might Megumi accept this suppression? Why does he seem to be going along with Yuji’s delusions? The Unlimited Void brain fog. Megumi brings attention to it after he wakes up.
If Sukuna can’t think straight after Gojo brain damage, neither is Megumi. Still Yuji has to be careful. If Megumi thinks too much, the illusion will be broken.
What does this mean for them?
Well, the character assassination isn’t real (probably) which is a good thing! Other than that? Not a clue. We’ve got a real catbox situation here. I can’t tell who is dead anymore.
Sukuna projects delusions when someone he’s connected with is dying. Yuji projects delusions someone connects with him while he’s severely injured/concussed. Both of them are kind towards the people they’re interacting with in this space between dreams and reality. They try to give people endings that leave them satisfied.
JJK 270 ends with the hunt for a curse user who can distort perceptions of reality. This curse user is initially mistaken as a cursed spirit. That sounds like Sukuna I think.
I’m pretty confident this happy ending illusion will be shattered, that's for sure.
My Final Answer
I'm betting it all on this being a delusion. This is a kind of prediction that will either age well, very badly, or interestingly. I don't know what's in store for the final chapter...but I do have some ideas I'd like to speculate with.
"Without love it cannot be seen."
This time I'm going to use this phrase very literally. I'm going to make one final gamble on the assumption that love is the answer. So let's go back to Love itself—one of those reoccurring themes in JJK.
Love is a curse in JJK. It has the power to distort reality and transform loved ones horribly. Desperation to save a loved one from death over and over has resulted in extremely traumatic things. Yuta turned his childhood crush into monster that caused havoc for years. You can blame everything that has happened in JJK on Gojo being unable to get over the loss of his loved one, Geto.
Hana could've vanquished Sukuna on the spot, but she didn't because she loves Megumi. It's something a lot of people blame her for. If she had just killed him there, the Sukuna battle wouldn't have happened. But that's not really the truth. The only reason Sukuna even got his powerful is because Megumi refused to let Yuji die.
Megumi and Yuji going back and forth trying to save each other have been acts of love driving the plot of JJK since the beginning of this manga. If Megumi actually died on Yuji? Who knows what would happen.
...
A lot of readers have been on a very funny copium because of these last 3 chapters. Some of them joke that they are just one massive Takaba-induced hallucination. This theory has some merit to it! After all, his CT does two things:
1) It distorts reality.
2) By sheer force of will it bends people's souls to his whims.
One of the biggest complaints about the past 3 chapters has been the Merger plot ending abruptly. As of JJK 270 Tengen and Sukuna's remains have been mixed into the barrier around Japan and everything is just fine according to Gakuganji.
People wanted to see what the Merger would do, just like Kenjaku. In universe, Tengen made a prediction. They guessed that the impurity from humans would dominate and consume everything. The impurity that Higuruma wants to protect. The impurity that Higuruma sees in Yuji.
Would Sukuna activate the merger and kill Megumi to spite Yuji? Absolutely.
Would Yuji do or become anything to save Megumi's life? Absolutely.
Do whatever you want with this information.
#cactus yaps#This is pure Beatoposting but I think I made my case pretty well. Anyways. GO READ UMINEKO NOW!!!#Do you ever think about how [redacted] becomes a Sorcerer in Umineko? Wait a second.#Also read the light novels. They're very good.#My bets are placed and I'm going to lose.#This has been my Umineko Kaisen.#itafushi#itadori yuji#fushiguro megumi#jjk spoilers#jujutsu kaisen#jjk 270#jjk 269#jjk meta
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your writing is literally the best in the cod fandom. we need more injured reader angst. it's too good
don't breathe — python333
— — — —
synopsis [reader] gets buried alive after refusing to give intel to enemy soldiers and *slips up and writes reader almost dying again* oops how did that happen haha
relationships platonic!price & gn!reader.
characters cap. john price.
word count 2.7k
warnings suffocation [reader], just generally really depressing thoughts, near death??, 2nd person pov [you/yours/yourself], usage of c/n [code name/call sign].
note aww tysm :(( dont say its the best im gonna get a complex LMAO but i appreciate it!! and yes i agree injured reader angst ftw :3 i present to you: reader gets very injured and theres a lot of angst and its basically just you suffering for a good 3/4 of the fic while the last quarter has the actual comfort!
“Hello?” You try again, your voice cracking and your tone as desperate as it can get, “Please, God, say someone can hear me.”
You’ve been trapped in a casket for about five minutes now—at least, you woke up five minutes ago. God knows how long you’ve been stuck in the stupid thing, but realistically, it’s probably been much longer than five minutes.
The last thing you remember from before you were buried is being in the interrogation room of some small terrorist group’s facility, one you and the others were led to believe was abandoned weeks ago.
Unfortunately, whoever gave you the information must’ve either had incredibly outdated information or was setting you all up for failure, because the facility was very much not abandoned and was instead full of enemy soldiers.
You all had already gotten into the building before you knew that, because of course you all had to be in the same spot at the same time—practically sitting ducks for the enemy—and of course you all had to be clueless about the possibly hundreds of people in the facility until it was too late.
As far as you know, everyone managed to escape. Everyone but you. They didn’t mean to leave you behind, of course they didn’t, they were more focused on just booking it out of the facility. However, because of that, you were now stuck—you assume—several feet underground in a casket that has a limited amount of oxygen that drops every time you take a breath.
You let out the breath you’re currently holding and suck in another deep breath, holding it as you think. Your strategy of holding your breath until you no longer could mostly worked, but it wouldn’t for long, you knew that soon you’d suffocate in all of the carbon dioxide gathering in the enclosed casket.
You don’t know how long you’d been unconscious in the casket, breathing in oxygen carelessly in your slumber, which made the whole situation worse. You didn’t even know how much time you had left.
You hate to waste your breath checking your comms, but the enemy soldiers had accidentally left your earpiece in your ear—the small device apparently going undetected under their radar—and you wanted to make the most of it. You move your arm from your side and press onto the PTT button on your earpiece, wincing a little at how cramped the casket was.
“Does anybody copy?” You ask again, staring up at the almost pitch black space above you, “I repeat, does anybody copy?”
It’s a vain attempt at contacting your team, really. You don’t know if they’re thinking about you, if the signal is going through, if they even have their earpieces on—you know nothing, and that terrifies you because you really don’t want to die right now but there’s literally nothing else you can do besides helplessly talk into your earpiece, not knowing if anyone’s listening.
Your lungs start to burn and you let out the breath you were holding, taking another deep breath and beginning to hold that one. The air feels… thick. It’s starting to get harder to breathe, and you know you shouldn’t panic but you can’t help the few worried thoughts that come to the forefront of your mind.
What am I going to do when I run out of oxygen and the only thing left for me to breathe in are my own discarded breaths? What will I do when all there is to do is suffocate? Am I going to try, in one last desperate attempt, to break out of the casket, or am I going to just lay here and die? Will my team try to find me, or will they forget about me? Have they already forgotten about me?
Before you can listen to any more of those depressing thoughts, a voice comes from your earpiece.
“H—lo? [c/n]?” It’s hard to tell with the static and the cuts in between the words, but you think it’s Price talking.
“Price?” You ask immediately, all thoughts of preserving your breath forgotten. “Holy shit, you can hear me?”
“Je—s— whe—e—” He cuts out for a moment and your stomach drops when all you can hear is static for a moment.
“You’re— You’re cutting out, Captain, what did you say?”
“Wher— —re you?” It takes you a moment to realize what he’s saying, your mind working much slower than it usually does, but once you do you shake your head negatively despite him not being there to see you.
“I don’t— I don’t know,” You respond, taking a deep breath before adding on, “I think I’m underground, I just know I’m in a casket and it’s getting harder to breathe and—”
“Okay, o—y,” You hear Price’s voice crackle, his voice becoming more distant and sounding almost muffled to you, “Sa— —ur bre—th, I’ll try to g—t some—e to track your— —tion.”
With the constant cutting out of his words and the distortion of his tone, you can barely register or process what he’s saying, and that only panics you more but you refuse to let your emotions get the better of you even in the state of disorientation you’re in, so you keep holding your breath.
A minute later, Price’s voice crackles through your earpiece again.
“Okay, we’ve got your loc—tion,” Price’s voice sounds… oddly far away, “We can—”
His voice slowly becomes muffled, and you release the breath you were holding without realizing it, slowly blinking up at the ceiling of the casket. A sort of haze falls over your mind and you can barely even hear Price anymore before you suddenly snap back to reality and hear his now much clearer voice loud in your ear.
“[c/n]? [c/n], are you still there?” You recognize his tone now, and you’re just a little shocked at the sheer amount of worry in it.
“Haven’t moved an inch,” You breathe out, before lying, “You cut out for a second for me, sorry.”
“Don’t be sorry, it’s okay,” Price reassures you, “I said we got your loc—tion and we’re hea—g out th— —w. It’s not t— far away from where —e alre—dy are, we’re ba—ely three clicks away.”
“… Clicks?” You ask, your eyebrows drawing together in confusion.
“Yes, clicks,” Price replies, sounding concerned, before hesitantly asking, “… You know what those are, right?”
“I don’t—” You struggle to find words for a moment before you speak again, your own voice starting to sound distant, “I don’t think so?”
“What do y—u mean you don’t thi— —o?” Price asks, his voice sounding freakishly close, “Are you okay?”
“No, yeah, I’m fine,” You lie through your teeth, not wanting to worry Price further, “I just… how far away are you?”
“Just ab—t two cli—ks now,” Price says, before pausing and clarifying, “Two kilometers.”
Two kilometers… how far is that? “And that’s… is that far, or?”
“No, it’s not too far. It’s just a mi—te away, we didn’t ge— —o far before Laswell got your loc—tion,” Price tells you, “We’ll be there soon, ok—y? We’ll get y— —ut of there.”
“A minute—” You cough and feel tears pricking at your eyes from how hard it is to take another breath, “A minute?”
“Yes, a minute— [c/n], are you okay?” Price asks again, before laughing nervously, “You know what a minute is, do— —ou?”
“...” You struggle to answer the question, thinking long and hard for a few seconds before hesitantly answering, “… Yeah, I do, sorry. It’s sixty seconds.”
“Why’d it take you so long to answer?”
“I don’t know, I’m sorry, I—” You take a few shallow breaths, and feel a headache start to build up, “How far away are you guys?”
“We’re alm—t there,” Price promises you, “The heli’s ab—t to l—nd, and we’ll dig you up, and—”
Why is it so cold? Price’s voice cuts off and when he stops talking you realize that you’re shivering. You ball your fists up and can’t even feel your nails digging into your palms, your hands having gone numb from the cold, and realizing that makes you discover that your lips feel numb too.
Your ears start to ring and you feel that uncomfortable pins and needles feeling in your hands, the sensation slowly traveling up your arms, making you both wanting to peel off your own skin and also grateful that you can at least feel something besides the cold.
In the midst of your thinking, you hear muffled thumping coming from above you—whoever buried you couldn’t have buried you anything below six feet.
“—llo? [c/n]? Are you still there?”
You bring your hand up, the movement slow and sluggish, and you try to search around the side of your face for your earpiece. You eventually find it and when you do you press against it until you feel the PTT button being pushed.
“Still here,” You confirm breathlessly, coughing again as you take a few more shallow breaths, “I think I’m running out of— of… what’s the fuckin’ air that you can breath in, it starts with an o…”
“… Oxygen?”
“Oxygen, yeah,” You slowly blink up at the ceiling of the casket, “There’s— I think— I don’t… I think… I think I’m gonna pass out, Captain.”
“[c/n], don’t you fucking dare,” Price growls, “You stay awake, I swear to fucking god.”
“I can’t—” You take a few more shallow breaths, before coughing, the tears escaping your eyes reaching the corners of your mouth.
You can hear Price briefly talk with someone else, his voice the most serious you’ve ever heard it, before he talks directly to you again, “How much longer do you think you have before you run out of oxygen?”
It takes you a moment to register the question, but when you do, you answer, “Uh… I don’t— I think… maybe a few more minutes? I can’t tell, it’s just hard to breathe, I can’t…”
“Okay, okay,” Price softly says, gusts of wind blowing into his mic as he talks, “Give me a second, okay? We’re almost there, kid, we’ll— we’ll be there in just a minute, we just passed over you, I just need you to stay awake.”
“In a minute,” You repeat to yourself, before taking a deep breath, hoping that you have enough oxygen to make it out of this casket because you really don’t want to die here, not when there’s help just a minute away.
After what you assume is a minute or two, instead of thumping, you hear something cut into the dirt above you. The sound, however, is heavily muffled, so muffled to the point where you don’t know if you’re hallucinating or not.
Is that a symptom of CO2 poisoning? Hallucinations? You lay still in the casket and can’t help but release the breath you’d only just taken, the ringing in your ears starting up again and growing louder faster than they had before.
Your entire body is numb, your chest is heavy, and you can feel a sort of fog fall over your mind. You can distantly hear Price yelling through your earpiece, but you can’t find it in yourself to respond, instead simply laying there, your blinking starting to slow down before it eventually stops, leaving your eyes closed.
—
For a moment, you think you died and went to heaven, which would be weird, considering all the things you’ve done in your life. Not saying you’d go to hell, just saying God would probably hesitate for a second before letting you in through the pearly gates.
You blink awake, slowly but surely, and the first thing you realize is that you can feel things again. You tilt your head down to the bump under the white bed sheets laid on top of you, and squeeze your hand into a ball, watching the bump move and feeling your fingers dig into your oddly sore palms.
You let out a sigh of relief and pull your hand out from the sheets, bringing it up to your face and feeling the oxygen mask that’s been placed over your mouth and nose.
“Don’t mess with that,” You hear a voice say to your right. You turn your head and see a very tired Captain Price, dark eyebags hanging under his eyes and arms crossed, his hands having a white knuckle grip on either one of his elbows.
“…” You don’t say anything, instead you simply stare at him until he sighs and gets up from his seat. You watch silently as he leans over your bed and bends down, before pausing, and then quickly snaking his hands under your back to pull you up just enough for him to properly hug you.
You reach up with shaky hands and tentatively hug him back, not nearly as tightly—not that you don’t want to, but you physically can’t with how weak your arms are right now—but with just as much sincere affection. You can feel Price’s beard rubbing against your neck and hear his small sniffles as he embraces you tightly.
Maybe it’s his sniffling, or the way you can finally feel warmth for the first time in what feels like forever, or maybe it’s just the fact that he’s holding you with so much care and affection that it almost makes you burst at the seams, whatever it is, it causes you to tear up as well.
Those tears quickly become sobs that bubble up in your throat and crawl their way out of it, forcing you to tuck your head into the crook of Price’s neck and muffle your sobs in it, muttering a small ‘sorry’ after each one.
After each ‘sorry’, Price responds with, “It’s okay, let it out, sweetheart, you’re okay,” and those reassuring words only make you cry more because God, you didn’t even think he’d find you, yet here he is, letting you cry into his neck and is reassuring you after every apology that it’s okay.
“I’m sorry, I��m sorry—” You mumble a litany of apologies into Price’s neck, your breath stuttering and hitching as you try to hold back your sobs. Price only shushes you and rubs his hand up and down your back in a comforting gesture, bringing his head up to kiss the top of your head.
He tucks your head under his chin, “Don’t apologize, it’s okay. You didn’t do anything wrong.”
And fuck, you know it’s just words, but it only makes you cry more.
Your sobs eventually stop, leaving you hiccuping against Price’s neck, silently crying as he continues to rub your back.
“I thought you died,” He whispers, his hand stuttering on your back, “I thought you died and I was going to dig up your dead body, when you didn’t answer me.”
You stay silent, letting him continue, “I thought you were dead when we dug you up and needed to feel your heartbeat for myself to confirm that you were still alive.”
He pauses for a moment before continuing, “I’ve been here ever since they put you in here. I haven’t slept, I’ve just stayed here, waiting for you to wake up so I could tell you that I—”
He chokes up for a moment before taking a deep breath and continuing, “I’m sorry for not even thinking to drag you out of the facility with me when we all ran out. You were— you were right there, and I couldn’t just grab your arm and take you with me, I just had to leave you behind and I—”
“You watched me while I was asleep?” You ask quietly, your eyebrows drawing together.
Price pauses and pulls his chin off of your head, and pulls you away from his neck so he can properly give you the most incredulous look he can pull, before saying, “I’m pouring my heart out to you and apologizing for practically leaving you for dead, and that’s what you’re worried about?”
“Well, I’m not worried, I’m just—” You shrug, not knowing how to explain it. Price sighs and chuckles quietly before tucking your head back under his chin.
“You’re insufferable,” He mumbles, sniffling a bit.
“… I forgive you, by the way,” You say after a moment of silence, “I didn’t really blame you in the first place.”
“You had the right to.”
“Sure I did.”
“But you didn’t blame me.”
“Right.” “…” Price stays silent for a moment before pressing another soft kiss to the top of your head and saying quietly, “You should blame me.”
“Maybe,” You mumble back, “But I won’t.”
Later, maybe an hour later, if the others see you asleep in Price’s arms while he keeps your head tucked under his chin and rubs your back affectionately—no they don’t.
#sorry that its kinda short#i started it at 12 am and nows its 3 :<#i write slow ok#and i was watching d:bh playthroughs at the same time#its not my faukt#anyway#TAGGING SPEEDRUN#cod#cod hcs#hcs#task force 141#tf141#captain john price#john soap mactavish#platonic taskforce141#simon ghost riley#kyle gaz garrick#platonic task force 141#platonic task force 141 x reader#platonic cod#price#soap#ghost#gaz#they arent in this but im tagging them anyway#:3#hurt/comfort#angst
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Daylight || 01 (M)
PART 2
I don't wanna look at anything else now that I saw you I don't wanna think of anything else now that I thought of you
SYNOPSIS: Between the endless flirty banter or secret looks of longing, the line between you and your boss had always been slightly blurred. But when a night out with friends has you and your boss meeting for the first time outside of the workplace, that line starts to become nonexistent as mutual feelings are brought to light.
PAIRING: CEO!Wonwoo x Assistant!Reader [with appearances by Mingyu (a self-proclaimed Cupid extraordinaire), Soonyoung & Joshua as supportive besties, Seungkwan & Seokmin as the life of the party, Seungcheol (a menace), and a brief glimpse of Chan.]
GENRE: Coworkers→Friends→Lovers!AU – Fluff + Smut [minors dni]
WORDS: The entirety of both parts is 27.1k. Part 1 is 15.4k and part 2 is 11.6k.
WARNINGS: Slowburn, pining from both ends. Reader is constantly in a silent crisis when it comes to feelings, and Wonwoo is possessive (both in and out of the bedroom). Mentions of alcohol, cursing, and grinding on the dancefloor. Wonwoo is a slightly hard!dom but talks you through it so sweetly it'll make you melt. Oral (both recieving), unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it), messy orgasms. Slight choking, dirty talk, alludes to squirting. Wonwoo is a pussy fiend.
A/N: Shoutout to the plethora of billionaire CEO books that I've been reading recently that ended up inspiring this piece and subsequently pulled me out of a three, almost four, year writing drought. But now I'm finding out that Tumblr has this stupid fucking character block limit that's not letting me post the fic in its entirety so it'll be split into two parts. Annoying ass rule. Anyway, It's good to be back! 🫶🏻
PLAYLIST: daylight by taylor swift // poison ivy by hemi moore // violet chemistry by miley cyrus // play with fire by sam tinnesz // ruin my life by zara larsson // tonight by zayn // middle of the night by elley duhe // worst behavior by ariana grande. // so it goes by taylor swift
The bustling street of people has you grumbling underneath your breath as you weave in and out of the crowd, the soles of your heels clicking against the pavement as you walk the last two blocks to get to your office. The early morning traffic of business men and women alike are already getting on your nerves as they take their time getting to their own jobs, taking strides small and slow enough that you’re ready to wring every single one of their necks as you bypass them while juggling the carrier of coffee in your hand.
A string of obscenities is falling from your mouth as you stumble inside the office building, clutching onto the coffees for dear life as you manage to make your way to the elevators without spilling the cups. Pressing the top floor, you’re heaving a sigh of relief as the elevator ‘dings’, a grumble escaping you as your heels click against the floor with each stride you take. Scattered murmurs around the office have you straining to hear the morning gossip, your eyes curiously peering around at the worried faces of your coworkers.
“He’s miserable today.”
Whirring around, you meet the wide smile of Mingyu, the head of finance and Wonwoo’s right hand man. You roll your eyes at his words before grabbing a coffee from the carrier and handing it to the man.
“When is he not miserable?” You counter, making Mingyu chuckle.
“When he’s around you,” he teases, making your face flush.
“Shut up,” you hiss, glaring at him. “He’s always miserable around me. If I didn’t know any better, I would think he hated me.”
He scoffs at your words before taking a sip of his coffee.
“Oh please,” he grinned. “You bring order and excitement to his life. Two things which he desperately needs.”
You shoot Mingyu a pointed look as you grip the last two coffees in the carrier, your head gesturing towards his office as your spin on your heel.
“Get back to work, Mingyu.”
The taller man grumbles, his lips forming into a pout as he calls behind you.
“Don’t tell me what to do!”
Ignoring his response, you make your way towards your desk. Placing the carrier down, you set your laptop bag onto your desk before unwrapping your purse from around you and setting it on your chair. Grabbing your coffee in one hand, you grab the remaining one in the carrier with your other hand before turning towards the open door behind your desk. He hasn’t noticed your presence yet, the man still immersed in the papers he’s reading.
Leaning against the doorframe, you let a smirk grace your lips as you gazed at your unsuspecting boss. His eyebrows are furrowed in concentration, glasses perched on the bridge of his nose, and he’s frowning as he reads over the words on the paper. Along with his serious and reserved nature, he was devastatingly handsome. Sharp eyes, high bridged nose, and lips that curled into a feline smirk when he was feeling cocky enough. His looks paired with the strong build and tall statue made him look nothing less than a god.
Crossing your arms over your chest, you break yourself out of analyzing your boss as you announce your presence.
“You know it wouldn’t kill you to smile every now and again.”
The sound of your voice has the man’s head snapping up to look at you, sharp eyes shooting you a pointed look as you grinned at your boss. Pushing yourself off of the doorframe, you walk over to him and place the other coffee cup down onto his desk, biting back a laugh as he stares at you with a blank look on his face.
“Now I understand why women get annoyed when people tell them to smile.”
His deadpan response only makes your smile grow wider as you take a seat in one of the chairs in front of him, your own cup of coffee nestled in your hands as you take a sip.
“I’m just saying,” you hold a hand up in defense. “If you keep frowning, your face is going to get stuck like that. And you’ll get wrinkles”
“Maybe then people will leave me alone,” he grumbled.
“Unfortunately, you’re a CEO, Mr. Jeon,” you point out. “You’re going to have to meet with people whether you want to or not.”
Wonwoo hums before he leans forward to grab his coffee.
Thick rimmed glasses are perched on the bridge of his nose, his sharp eyes devoid of any amusement.
“If I asked you to cancel all of my meetings for today, would you?”
You splutter into your coffee cup at his question, eyes widening at the serious look on his face.
“Please don’t tell me you’re serious,” you whined, shoulders slumping in defeat. “It’s already eight thirty and your first meeting is in half an hour!”
Wonwoo purses his lips, eyes glinting under the fluorescents.
“I’m sure they would understand,” he reassures.
It’s then you catch him biting back a small smile, realization washing over you as your lips part in surprise.
“Are - are you – making a joke?”
Wonwoo shrugs, this time letting his lips curl into a feline-like smirk.
“Not a very good one, apparently,” he chuckles, making you let out a laugh of surprise.
“Look at you, Mr. Jeon,” you beam. “You can smile every once in a while.”
Shaking his head at your words, Wonwoo folds his hands on his desk before leaning comfortably against the back of his chair.
“Were you able to set up the meeting with Seungcheol?”
You nod, crossing your legs as you adjust your posture on the chair.
“He’ll be meeting us in two weeks,” you informed. “Mingyu and I are already working on the numbers and stats as well as putting together the powerpoint to present.”
Wonwoo nods in acknowledgement, his glasses slightly sliding down the bridge of his nose at the movement, and you try to ignore the muscles in his arm as you watch him push them back up.
“Good,” he praises. “I expect nothing less than perfect with the two of you.”
You swallow thickly at the praise, adjusting your legs once more as you try not to shrink under his gaze.
“Right,” you murmur, avoiding his eyes. “I should get to work.”
Smoothing out your skirt as you stand up, you turn to walk away from Wonwoo when he calls out our name, your head turning back to look at him as he gestures towards the coffee.
“Thank you,” he calls out. “For the drink.”
Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion, not quite sure why he chose now of all the times to thank you for the drink you bring him everyday.
“You’re welcome.”
Pushing aside the confusion, you turn back around and get started on your day.
“(Y/N)!”
Soonyoung’s whine reverberates from the speaker as you wince, masking it with a smile as you look at your friend on the screen.
With your busy work schedule, you haven't had much time to see or hang out with your friends, gaining you whines and groans of ‘We miss you’s!’ from the group whenever you have a chance to Facetime them.
“Hi Soonie,” you greet, beaming with a small wave. “Happy almost birthday!”
Soonyoung’s grin widens at your words, the blonde bouncing happily on the other side of the screen.
“Thank you, honey!” He responds. “I was actually calling about that. We’re going to the HYBE Club on Friday for my birthday and I wanted to see if you were able to go.”
Pursing your lips, you perch your phone up against the corner of your computer screen as you toggle around the apps, pulling up your calendar and scanning over the dates. The empty space for Friday’s date stares back at you and you almost want to cry out of relief at the sight of a rare day off, your lips curving into a bright smile as you peer down at Soonyoung’s face on the screen.
“Believe it or not,” you started, grinning at your friend. “I’m off.”
A joyous cheer escapes the blonde, muffled shouts in the background indicating that your friends had heard the whole thing and were collectively celebrating at the fact that you were able to join them. Soonyoung beams at the camera.
“We’re going to have a blast, (Y/N)!” He says, excitedly. “Meet us at HYBE Club around five! We’re going to start out with dinner and drinks!”
“And dancing!”
Dokyeom’s shout echoes in your airpod and you can’t help but to giggle as he and Soonyoung wrestle over the phone, the former’s bright smile coming into view as he grins at you through the phone.
“Hi (Y/N)!” He greets, his infectious smile making you beam back at him.
“Hi ‘Kyeomie.” you coo, blowing him a kiss. “I miss you!”
“We miss you too!” He whines, pouting. “You’ve been working too hard lately.”
“I know I have,” you frown. “But I’m excited to be able to have a night with you guys.”
“We can’t wait (Y/N)!”
Joshua and Seungkwan shout from the background and you can’t help but to laugh as the four of them wrestle over the phone. You were so preoccupied in watching the chaos unfold amongst your friends that you hadn’t noticed the presence that stood behind you, the deep timbre almost making you jump out of your skin.
“Am I interrupting something?”
You’re clambering to hit the end button, heat flooding your cheeks as you place the phone face down on your desk as you swivel your chair to face Wonwoo, your boss standing behind you with his arms folded over his chest. Butterflies flutter wildly in your stomach as you catch the playful glint in his eyes as he leans against the doorway.
“N – not at all, Mr. Jeon,” you stuttered out. “I was just finishing my lunch break.”
Wonwoo nods, a small frown on his face as his gaze trails over you.
“Ah,” he responds, and you catch the slight slump of his shoulders at your words. “I was actually coming to see if you wanted to grab lunch with me.”
Your heart stilled, the butterflies multiplying tenfold as you mirror his frown.
“Oh,” you mutter, dejectedly. “I’m sorry, sir. If I had known –”
“It’s alright, (Y/N),” he brushes off your apology with a wave of his hand. “Now I know for next time to catch you a little sooner.”
Offering you a small smile, he bows his head in your direction before walking off to the elevators. You’re still frowning as you watch his retreating form, your heart tugging regretfully in your chest, a small sigh escaping you as you slump back defeated in your chair.
“Yikes,” a voice chimes from behind you. “Break his heart, why don’t you?”
Your eyes narrowed into a glare as your head snapped to look at a smirking Mingyu, his tall stature leaning against your desk.
“Shut up, Mingyu,” you bite out, making the man laugh.
“The man just wanted to treat you to a nice meal and you turned him down,” he tuts, shaking his head. “That’s cold.”
“I already ate!” You defended. “I wasn’t going to just sit there and watch him eat.”
Mingyu purses his lips, shoulders shrugging in thought.
“Maybe he likes that,” he grins. “Maybe he just wanted to be in your company.”
You roll your eyes at his words, waving him off as you turn to your computer.
“I’m in his company enough,” you muttered, making Mingyu snicker.
“Maybe he wants more than your company.”
Mingyu wiggles his eyebrows at you teasingly, chortling with laughter as you chuck a pen in his direction.
“Leave me alone, Gyu!”
“I’m just saying,” he grins, holding his hands up in defense. “It’s something to think about.”
“It’s nothing to think about,” you grumbled. “Go back to your office and mind your business.”
Mingyu’s laugh follows him as he walks away, leaving you to mull over his words as your mind fills with the image of you laying in your boss’s arms, heat flooding between your legs at the thought of your bare body pressed against his silk sheets.
Ignoring your increased heart rate, you’re turning back to the computer and grumbling under your breath.
Go to hell, Kim Mingyu.
Tongues and teeth clash together in a bruising kiss as you’re clambering to sit on the desk, a whimper falling from your lips as hands rip open your blouse, buttons flying everywhere as your chest becomes exposed. There’s a growl against your lips, teeth clamping down onto your bottom one as greedy hands encase themselves around your covered breasts. If the bruising kiss hadn’t left you breathless, it was the rough kneading to your bra-clad mounds that had your lips parting in ecstasy. Frenzied lips leave a hot trail down the expanse of your neck as you’re perched on the desk, legs wrapping around lean hips.
“God, you’re perfect,” he grits out, tongue sweeping over the valley between your breasts. “Perfect for me and only me. Aren’t you, sweetheart?”
You moan at his words, back arching into his touch as he reaches behind to unclasp your bra.
“Only you, Mr. Jeon.”
A salacious smirk crosses his lips as he peers up at you from between your breasts, glasses haphazardly sitting on the bridge of his nose, and he’s tonguing at your flesh as he slides your bra straps down your arms, mouth ghosting over a pert nipple before taking it fully in his mouth –
And then chimes are going off.
There’s an obnoxious ring filling the air as you bolt upright in bed, heat pooling in between your legs as you try to grip onto your surroundings.
Much to your dismay, you’re in your apartment – alone – filled with nothing but the remnants of your burning arousal. Your eyebrows furrowed in frustration, a string of curses falling from your lips as you’re fishing around for the obnoxious ringtone that had disturbed your scandalous dream. Peering down at the screen, you glare at the caller, mentally condemning them into next week as you press the answer button.
“You’re a dead man.”
Your words are harsh as you answer the call, a whine falling from the receiving end as you glare into the empty room.
“I’m sorry,” Mingyu apologizes, making you scoff. “But it’s an emergency.”
You grit your teeth as he speaks, your body refusing to get up from the bed as sleep and arousal still swirls in the pit of your stomach.
“I swear to god, Mingyu, if someone is not dying –”
“The presentation got pushed up.”
Your threat falls short, lips parting in shock as your eyes widen in alarm.
“You’re joking.”
“It’s bad, (Y/N),” he says quietly into the phone. “I’ve never seen him like this before.”
A heavy sigh falls from you as you gnaw at the inside of your lip.
“Does he want anything?” You ask softly. “Coffee? Breakfast? A hammer to destroy his office?”
Mingyu chuckles on the other end.
“Coffee is always good for him,” he pauses, taking a deep breath. “A blowjob might work too.”
“Go fuck yourself,” you scoff, and Mingyu bursts out laughing at your response. “Give me an hour to get ready and I’ll be in.”
“Hurry, please,” he whines. “He’s doing that thing where he stares catatonically into nothing and it’s starting to scare me.”
You snort at that, shaking your head at Mingyu.
“Just give him encouraging pats on the back,” you joked, grinning. “And tell him he’s doing a great job.”
“He’s not going to like it if I do it,” Mingyu grumbles. “He only likes you.”
“Suck it up you big baby,” you tease. “You’ll be fine.”
Not waiting to hear his response, you end the call with a huff as you flop back down onto your pillows, staring up at the ceiling. The intense burn that had ignited between your thighs had simmered to a dull ache, the arousal from the very vivid dream a now distant memory. Clenching your thighs together to soothe the remnants of your desire, you ran a hand over your face before reluctantly rolling out of bed.
On a normal day, most of your coworkers would have still been half asleep, dragging their feet around the office as they fought off the remnants of slumber. The morning hours were usually somber, few words spoken between each other as they tried to finish their morning coffees.
Today was not one of those days.
The second you step out of the elevator, you’re met with utter chaos of chatter and frantic pacing — almost like they were chickens with their heads cut off. You’re frozen to the spot as you watch the group around you shove papers into each other's hands and point in the direction of the copier, demands upon demands being yelled at to one another.
“Jesus Christ,” you muttered.
Clutching the carrier of coffee in your hand, you weave in between the frazzled group as you make your way straight to Wonwoo’s office, not even bothering to drop your stuff on your desk as you push his door open. Mingyu sits with his back to you, head snapping up to look at you with a sigh of relief as you make your way into the office. Across from him sits your boss who, true to Mingyu’s word, was staring into the abyss with his hands folded on his desk.
Cautiously you’re walking over to Wonwoo and placing a gentle hand on his back, your other one putting the coffee on his desk as you offer a soothing pat to his broad stature. Wonwoo had abandoned his glasses, the specs splayed out carelessly in front of him, and his sharp eyes are settling on you as you rubbed his back. As your gaze met his, you were reminded of the dream you had before Mingyu had so rudely interrupted it.
The image of Wonwoo laying you out on this very desk, mouth on your breasts and hands resting somewhere a boss’s hands shouldn’t be on their assistant. Heat fills your body as you watch him lean into your touch, his stern expression softening, and he’s graciously taking the coffee from you as he grabs your hand in his.
“Thank you for this,” he accepts, graciously. “You always seem to know when I need it.”
From out of the corner of your eye, you see the smug smirk on Mingyu’s face and you fight back the urge to kick him in the shin as you offer your boss a small smile.
“You don’t have to keep thanking me,” you reply, squeezing his hand in reassurement before pulling away. “I am your assistant, after all. It’s my job to know these things.”
The brief softened gaze on his face hardens once more at your words and he’s watching in silence as you move to the opposite side of the desk to take a seat next to Mingyu. His sharp gaze falls over the two of you, eyes scrutinizing your every move, and you push away the heat blooming in between your legs as you cross them.
Mingyu peers between the two of you, an eyebrow quirked attentively before he’s leaning forward in his chair.
“Do you want to break the news or should I?”
Wonwoo’s jaw clenched, his expression stony as he looks at you.
“Seungcheol asked me to push up the deadline,” he pauses, and you catch him gritting his teeth in aggravation.
“How soon?” You ask, nervously taking a sip of your coffee. Wonwoo doesn’t miss a beat.
“This Friday.”
The coffee almost splutters from your mouth as you choke in surprise, eyes widening as you look between the two men.
“That’s in three days!” You exclaim. “Not to mention I’m off that day!”
Mingyu offers you a pitiful expression while Wonwoo remains stoic, the difference between them comparable to night and day.
“Not anymore, you’re not,” Wonwoo denies, and you feel your heart clench. “We need you here.”
Resentment begins to build in your body as you shoot your boss an incredulous look, anger boiling in your veins.
“Why did you even agree to this?” You asked harshly, making Wonwoo tense up. “You could’ve asked him to give you until at least Monday.”
Wonwoo’s lips press into a thin line and you just know he’s holding back from scolding you in front of Mingyu.
“It was out of my control,” he shrugs, and the nonchalant response has you rising out of your seat as the anger inside of you bubbles.
“Bullshit!” You bite back, and Wonwoo’s face hardens.
“Watch yourself, (Y/N),” he warns, making you scoff.
“I’m allowed to be angry, Mr. Jeon,” you point out. “Very rarely do I get a day off and the one time I do, you make the decision to take that away from me.”
Wonwoo’s jaw clenched are your words, his sharp eyes glinting with fury as he looks down the bridge of his nose at you.
“You are my assistant, Ms. (L/N),” he bites out. “When I’m here, you’re here.”
You were certain that if you had been a cartoon character, steam would’ve been emitting from your ears as you glare at the man in front of you.
“I have plans,” you grit harshly. Wonwoo doesn’t bat an eye.
“Reschedule them.”
Mingyu can only watch the two of you with an open mouth, utterly shocked at the exchange happening before him.
In your last attempt to make him change his mind, you grit your teeth as you shoot your boss a look of fury.
“I have a date.”
The air between the three of you stilled.
You watched as Wonwoo’s shoulders tensed, a flash of jealousy in his eyes as he glowered at you from his desk. Mingyu’s eyes bugged out of his head, the businessman immediately pushing himself out his seat as he held his hands up in defense.
“I — I don’t think this concerns me,” he excuses himself, brown eyes glimmering in worry as he shoots you a look. “Come find me later when you’re both ready to talk about the presentation.”
You and Wonwoo stay silent as Mingyu walks out of the office, the door slamming shut behind him, and it’s then that Wonwoo stands up from his desk. His tall stature towering over the wood, a move he made with clients when he was trying to intimidate them — a move you’ve watched him make with everyone but you.
“I’m sure whoever it is will understand that your job comes first,” he pauses, his voice cold. “That I come first.”
You stand your ground, your furious gaze borrowing into his.
“Are you insisting that I don’t deserve a personal life?”
Wonwoo doesn’t back down in the slightest.
“I’m saying that this is your job,” he reiterates. “You’re my assistant. I’m your priority. When I’m needed, you’re needed.”
“So you’re telling me that any plans I make or have planned already have to be flexible so that I can accommodate you?”
“Precisely.”
A sharp inhale comes from you, angry tears threatening to spill over your cheeks as you fight them back. Your fists clench at your sides as you send your boss a menacing glare. You knew there was no way around this, you knew that no matter how much you defended yourself Wonwoo wasn’t going to back down.
You exhale slowly, keeping the tears at bay.
“It seems I don’t have much of a choice, do I?” You concede, trying to stabilize your shaky voice.
Clutching your coffee in your hand, you move to walk away from him when his warm hand encloses around yours, the hardened gaze he had kept focused on you softening as he caught sight of the tears pooling in your eyes.
“(Y/N)…”
Ripping your hand away from him, you shoot daggers towards him as you walk towards the door.
“I’m taking a walk,” you spat, voice quivering with emotion. “Don’t come after me.”
With that, you’re storming out of his office, making sure to slam the door behind you.
Hot tears are spilling over your cheeks as you frantically press the elevator button, your head hung low as you try to mask the sight of you crying as you wait for the doors to open, your body trembling with angry sobs as you bite them back, gritting your teeth in anger as the elevator dings. Stepping inside, you turn to face the lobby and catch the sight of a concerned Mingyu watching you as you press the close button.
As soon as the doors closed and you’re heading down, you’re pulling your phone from your pocket and dialing Soonyoung’s number, the blonde almost immediately answering the FaceTime call with a shocked look on his face.
“(Y/N), honey? What’s going on?”
His caring tone draws a fresh batch of tears in your eyes as you step outside of the elevator and walk into the lobby, making a beeline for the bathroom as you lock yourself in a stall. Defeated sobs wrack your body as you try to catch your breath.
“Soonie,” you cried, hastily wiping your tears. “I’m sorry I’m calling you like this.”
Soonyoung shakes his head, concern in his eyes as he stares back at you through the screen.
“Don’t apologize baby,” he reassured, softly. “We’ve all had bad days.”
Wiping your nose, you sniffle quietly as you nod, acknowledging his words.
“What happened, honey?”
“I think I’m going to have to miss out on your birthday, Soonie,” you say quietly, making Soonyoung whine.
“What?! Why?!”
“That big presentation that wasn’t due for two more weeks got pushed up to this Friday instead.”
“Oh, what the fuck?!” He groaned. “Aren’t you supposed to be off anyways?”
A bitter laugh escapes you at that, your teeth gritting together in anger as you nod.
“Keyword is supposed to,” you bite out, rolling your eyes. “But my boss said that I now have to come in. Actually — he pretty much said that I’m not entitled to a personal life.”
Soonyoung’s mouth opens in shock at that, his eyes widening.
“Are you fucking serious?” He asks, flabbergasted.
“I wish I wasn’t,” you affirm, sadly. “He said that since I’m his assistant – anywhere he is, I have to be right next to him. Plans or no plans, off of work or not.”
The blonde scoffs, eyes narrowing into a glare.
“That’s bullshit,” he spat, and you can’t help but to laugh without humor.
“Yeah,” you muttered. “I said the same thing.”
You watch as Soonyoung purses his lips in thoughts, a hopeful look crossing his features as he looks at you through the phone.
“The presentation shouldn’t take that long, right?” He asks. “Like you can skip the dinner and then just meet us right at the club instead!”
Your sullen expression morphs into a hopeful one as you consider his words, your head slowly nodding in acknowledgement as you offer the blonde a bright smile.
“Yeah,” you agreed. “I guess you’re right.”
“I’m always right,” he teases, making you scoff playfully.
“Whatever you say, Soonie,” you jest, making him laugh. “I should get back upstairs…”
Soonyoung smiles at you through the phone, offering you a gesture of encouragement as he grins.
“Deep breaths, honey!” He chimes. “Don’t let that asshole get to you.”
Smiling at him, you both exchange your goodbye before hanging up. A heavy sigh escapes you as you take a deep breath to compose yourself once more before unlocking the stall and walking to the sink. The pitiful expression that rested on your features made you want to sink down to the floor in embarrassment, your gaze flickering over the mascara that had streaked your cheeks from the waterfall of tears. Grumbling to yourself, you reach for some paper towels before wetting it under the sink and cleaning off the remnants of your breakdown, mentally cursing Wonwoo into oblivion.
Once you were set, you took an extra minute to collect your thoughts, trying to settle your still enraged mind as you made a silent vow to ignore the man you called your boss for the remainder of the week.
Should be easy, right?
Wrong.
With the silent vow in place, you had walked into the office the next day with every intention of ignoring him.
Until you catch sight of the vase of roses that sat on your desk.
The beautiful red petals bloomed in the crystal casing, the fragrance filling your senses as you leaned down to smell them. A solemn expression crosses your features as you pluck the card from between the petals, lips pursing in thought as you stare down at the writing.
‘I can’t do this without you.’
Your heart feels like it’s tearing at the seams as you look down at his handwriting, the messy scrawl of his admittance sending your stomach into a frenzy of butterflies, and you’re peering into his opened office door to see his sharp gaze awaiting your reaction. The gesture was sweet, sure, but you were also human – a human with feelings and a life. So instead of thanking him, you’re pushing away those damned butterflies and turning your head away from him as you silently set up your desk.
You didn’t look back at him once.
Despite other numerous attempts to gain your attention, you had successfully managed to give Wonwoo radio silence until it came time to get the presentation together. And, even then, you still sat tight-lipped as he and Mingyu went over the details of what’s to come within the next few hours as the three of you awaited Seungcheol’s arrival.
Your pen glides over your notepad as you jot down last minute ideas and thoughts, your tongue sticking out of the side of your mouth in concentration as you work quietly at the table. From the left of you, Mingyu types away at his laptop, quietly cursing at the powerpoint in front of him as he fixes the last minute details. To the right of you, you can already feel the pointed gaze in your direction from your boss as he sits silently beside the two of you, sharp eyes lingering on both yours and Mingyu’s forms as the two of you work diligently.
Wonwoo purses his lips, trying to bite back the amusement as he looks over at you two.
“I think this is the hardest I’ve ever seen you two work.”
Simultaneously, yours and Mingyu’s heads snap over to look at your boss, your eyes narrowed in an accusing glare while Mingyu’s twinkle with humor.
“We wouldn’t be working so hard if you hadn’t agreed to pushing up this damned meeting.”
Your voice comes out harsher than you intend to, but it doesn’t deter Wonwoo one bit.
“Ah,” he smirks. “She speaks.”
A menacing glare is shot towards him as you scoot your chair closer to Mingyu, trying to shift your attention back towards your notes, but you’re frozen in shock as Wonwoo grabs the back of your chair to slide you back closer to his side, sharp eyes gazing sadly at you.
“Look at me,” he murmurs, and you hear Mingyu cough awkwardly, trying not to watch the two of you as he types away at his laptop. “(Y/N), please.”
As much as you wanted to make him grovel a bit longer, you knew from the gifts and gestures he’d been giving you the past two days had been enough of an apology. So, reluctantly, you’re lifting your eyes to meet his brown ones, your breath catching in your throat as you hold his softened gaze. You can feel the butterflies begin to awaken in the pit of your stomach as your heart sped up in your chest, lips parting slightly as you stared at the devastatingly handsome man.
Reaching over, he’s gently grabbing your hand in his, all the while keeping his eyes on you.
“I’m sorry for making you come in on your day off,” he apologized, quietly. “I’m sorry for never giving you one to begin with.”
Wonwoo’s teeth grit as he tries to keep his expression neutral, his thumb gently soothes over the back of your hand.
“And I’m sorry for making you miss your… date.”
Date..? Oh – oh.
Your hardened gaze softens into one of understanding and you’re offering your boss a small smile, your hand turning in his as you clutch it.
“I forgive you,” you relent, squeezing his hand in reassurance. “And - I, uh, didn’t actually have a date.”
From out of the corner of your eye you see Mingyu’s head snap towards you, eyes wide as he looks between you and Wonwoo. The latter keeps his gaze on yours, the corners of his lips quivering ever so slightly as his sharp eyes trace for any sort of fabrication he can find. And then he laughs – a full, throwing his head back and cackling kind of laugh. One that sends your heart into overdrive as he grins widely.
“So you just wanted to enjoy some peace and quiet by yourself?” He asks, teasingly.
“No,” you deny, frowning. “I really did have plans, or rather, I still do after this. I’m going out for my friend’s birthday.”
Wonwoo’s eyes shine playfully as he pats your hand.
“It’s okay,” he grins. “As long as you forgive me and we get this presentation over and done with, you’ll be out of here in no time.”
As Wonwoo finishes speaking, the conference door all but flies open, a mass of blonde hair and a dimpled smile coming into view as Seungcheol walks through the door. The three of you stand simultaneously, nervous but warm smiles plastered on your faces as you greet the businessman. Wonwoo stands glued to the spot next to you as you watch Seungcheol greet Mingyu, the two shaking hands as they joke amongst themselves. It’s then that the severity and importance of this meeting finally hits you, your palms growing clammy with nerves as your brain clutters with what ifs and possible negative outcomes if everything fails between the two companies.
From behind you, Wonwoo must’ve noticed the sudden tension in your stature as he leans forward, a gentle hand placing itself on the small of your back as he leans in to brush his lips against your ear.
“Relax, sweetheart,” he murmurs quietly, his other hand reaching to squeeze yours in reassurance. “It’s going to be fine.”
Yet the warmth of his breath and the close proximity of his body pressing to yours as his cologne fills your senses does absolutely nothing to help your nerves. You squeeze his hand back in silent acknowledgement before dropping it as Seungcheol rounds on you, a bright smile on the blonde’s face as he offers you a hand.
“Ms. (Y/N),” he greets, beaming. “It’s always lovely to see you, beautiful.”
You can feel Wonwoo tense at the compliment and you fight the urge to rip your hand from his as you shake it, a tight-lipped smile being sent his way as he bowed your head.
“Nice to see you, Mr. Choi,” you greet. Seungcheol’s gaze falls between you and the man standing behind you, a knowing gleam in his eyes.
“Wonwoo you have yourself a dime here,” he compliments, smirking. “She has been nothing but amazing when it comes to the communication aspect. Not to mention she’s brilliant.”
Wonwoo keeps his hand on the small of your back while his other is outstretched towards his friend, the two shaking hands with a fierce grip as Wonwoo’s gaze hardens at the blonde.
“That she is,” he agreed. “I’m lucky to have her.”
Heat floods your cheeks at the competitive compliments between the two businessmen, a pleading look that screams ‘Help me’ is being sent towards Mingyu who stands behind Seungcheol with a puppy-like grin at the exchange, the taller man laughing quietly at your expense. Rolling your eyes, you break the silent competition between the two CEOs as you gesture towards the table.
“Shall we get started?”
Five hours. The presentation lasted for five fucking hours.
Between the glitches happening within the powerpoint and the constant stutter of your voice, you were positive that Seungcheol was going to stop the three of you halfway and just walk out – but he didn’t. Instead the blonde sat with a grin of amusement as you and Mingyu presented the possible numbers and outcomes of the two companies coming together for the project. Wonwoo sat stoic beside him, sharp eyes glued to you as you closed out of the final slide, anxiously awaiting his friend’s response as you clasped your hands together behind your back.
Seungcheol is beaming at you, dimples protruding from his cheeks, and he’s turning towards Wonwoo as he points in your direction.
“I like her,” he begins. “She’s got a strong head on her shoulders.”
Turning back towards you, Seungcheol leans on his elbows as he gestures towards the presentation.
“Despite the small hiccups from the technology, you did great, (Y/N),” he continues, praising you. “Both you and Mingyu did so well putting all of this together. I appreciate the dedication and hard work you’ve done for this, truly. Both of you would be an incredible asset to my company and I would absolutely be a fool to turn down the offer of working with both my friend and his amazing team.”
Surprise floods your features as you and Mingyu shoot each other identical looks of shock.
“Is – is that a yes for the project?”
Seungcheol laughs, nodding his head in affirmation.
“That’s a definite yes,” he beams. “It was a yes from the very first email you had sent me, if I’m honest. I just wanted to see what ideas you all had in mind – and I wanted to see this one sweat it out a little bit.”
You stifle a laugh as the blonde points to the stoic man behind him, Wonwoo grumbling under his breath as he rolls his eyes at his friend.
“So you just wanted to see me suffer?” Wonwoo asks, no emotion in his voice.
“Pretty much,” Seungcheol beams with amusement.
Wonwoo shakes his head as he stands up from his chair, his broad stature cracking with the release of tension as he stretches from sitting for so long.
“That’ll be it for today,” he dismisses, shooting Seungcheol a pointed look. “I think we’ve all been tortured enough.”
A wave of relief washes over you as your shoulders slump slightly, the tension being released from your body as you clean up the remnants of the presentation. From beside you, Mingyu is shooting you a thumbs up, silently praising your efforts before he’s packing up his laptop and zooming out of the room. As you zip up your bag and turn to leave, Seungcheol is gently grabbing your wrist to stop you, a playful look in his eyes as he offers you a small smile.
“You’re an extraordinary woman, Ms. (Y/N),” he compliments, and you feel your cheeks heat up as you fight to keep eye contact. “I have half a mind to steal you from Wonwoo and make you my own assistant.”
You open your mouth to retort when you feel the warmth of your boss press behind you, and you don’t even have to look up at him to know that he’s glaring daggers at the blonde.
“She would never leave me,” he dismisses, voice cold. “If there’s one thing I admire the most about Ms. (Y/N), it’s that she’s loyal to those around her.”
Wonwoo never breaks eye contact with Seungcheol, the two glaring daggers at one another as they stand tall and proud.
“Right, sweetheart?”
You swallow thickly, rolling your eyes at the ego exchange between the two of them, and you playfully hit Wonwoo’s shoulder before grabbing your things.
“Both of you need to relax,” you jest, playfully. “Mr. Choi, I appreciate the compliment but I fear that this one needs me the most.”
Seungcheol smirks at that, a knowing look in his eyes as he looks between you and Wonwoo.
“I’m starting to see that,” he responds, coolly.
Wonwoo stays silent as you make your way to the door, a weary glance thrown between the two of them before you’re opening it with a call over your shoulder.
“Try not to let your ego’s get the best of the two of you while I’m gone, please.”
And with that, you’re out the door before you can see Seungcheol wiggle his eyebrows suggestively at Wonwoo, the latter sending a glare of warning at the blonde who now caught on to the situation.
“(Y/N)!”
Your gaze lands on a beaming Soonyoung as you make your way through the crowd of bodies, a matching grin dancing across your lips as you reach where he stood. His arm lazily drapes around your shoulder in a half hug, the man’s infectious giggle ringing over the blaring music. Returning the embrace, you hug him in greeting before breaking apart. You can feel your friend vibrating with excitement as he grabs your hand and pulls you over to the roped off section where the rest of your friends were occupying. As soon as you cross the threshold, there’s a glass of champagne being placed in your hand and Soonyoung is tugging you towards the group.
“Look who finally showed up!”
Happy cheers of your name echoes amongst your group of friends, glasses being lifted in your direction as they greet you in unison. Lifting your glass in response, you beam at the group before downing the glass, warmth filling your body from the alcohol. From beside you Soonyoung cheers as you chug, the man wasting no time before shoving another drink into your now empty hand before scurrying off to the others. A chuckle falls from you as you watch him pull a half wasted Dokyeom to the dance floor, Seungkwan hot on their heels as the trio pulls out an abrupt dance routine.
Shaking your head at their antics, you take a seat next to Joshua at the table, the man offering you a gentle smile as he scoots to make room.
“It’s good to see you, (Y/N),” he greets. “It’s been too long since the last time you’ve come out with us.”
“I know,” you agree, regret washing over your features. “Work has been crazy lately. I haven’t really had much time to do anything else besides be at the office or trying to get some sleep.”
A look of sympathy flashes in his eyes, Joshua nodding in understanding.
“I get it,” he reassured you with a bright smile. “It sucks being an adult sometimes, doesn’t it?”
You laugh at his words before taking a sip of whatever it was that Soonyoung had given you.
“That it does, Shua. I sometimes wish we were kids again without a care in the world. No bills, no schedules — nothing but free time to do whatever we want.”
“Or until we get caught drinking in the school parking lot at midnight,” he points out, laughing.
“That’s different!” You say, taking another sip of your drink. “We would’ve never gotten caught had Soonyoung not brought out the Bluetooth microphone and started singing.”
Joshua’s head rolls back as he laughs louder, shaking his head at the memory.
“He really tried to get the cops to fall for his serenade,” he chortled. “We almost got locked in a cell for that one had it not been for me.”
You smile at the memory, gently tapping your glass against Shua’s.
“Thank god one of us had a brain that night,” you grin. “Otherwise we would’ve been screwed.”
Amusement twinkles in Joshua’s eyes and the brunette opens his mouth to speak before his gaze falls on a figure behind you, a deep voice cutting off his train of thought.
“Sorry we’re late, everyone.”
Your hand tightens around your glass at the voice, eyes widening in shock as your head snaps to look at the two figures towering over your table. The two familiar faces are night and day; one stands with a beaming smile, eyes shining and body bouncing to the beat of the music like an energetic puppy. The other is stoic, hands shoved into the pockets of his slacks while a pointed gaze rests underneath the thick rims of his glasses, his intense gaze sweeping over the group until it lands on your shocked ones.
Your lips part in disbelief, a string of curses tumbling incoherently from your mouth, and you straighten your posture as your boss stares back at you, dark eyes glinting with curiosity.
“You made it!”
Soonyoung’s boisterous voice booms over the loud music, the blonde drunkenly placing a glass of champagne in each of their hands before wrapping both of his arms around their shoulders and hugging them into him. From his right, Mingyu laughs boisterously, leaning into the embrace as he hugs his friend back.
“Yeah, sorry about that,” he apologized. “We were finishing up at the office.”
From the left of Soonyoung, Wonwoo stays silent, his piercing gaze locked on yours, and you catch the briefest sight of his jaw clenching as Soonyoung gestures towards you.
“I’m not sure if you’ve ever met her before,” he begins, beaming from ear to ear. “But this is (Y/N), my best friend since we were in diapers.”
Your heart pounds in your chest, the beat echoing in your ears and drowning out the music as you stare at your colleagues. Mingyu’s face falls into pleasant surprise before he’s letting out a laugh, muscular arms crossing over his broad stature.
“Small world,” he comments, shooting a look between you and your boss. Soonyoung’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion, a weary glance swept over the three of you.
“What do you mean?” The blonde asks curiously.
The scrutinizing gaze of your boss has you wanting to sink into the cushions of the booth and disappear, heat flaming your cheeks as the already too tight dress you were wearing somehow feels as if it’s melting into your skin, and you try to swallow the lump that had formed in your throat as Mingyu spoke once more.
“We work together,” he clarifies, a knowing smirk on his face. “She’s Wonwoo’s assistant.”
There’s a brief pause, realization sinking into Soonyoung’s features, before he’s turning towards the man on his left and smacking him on the shoulder.
“You’re her boss?!” He asks incredulously. “You’re the asshole who’s never giving her time off for a personal life?!”
Your eyes widened at his words, hands raising in defense as you move to kick Soonyoung in the shin.
“Soonyoung,” you hiss, glaring at the blonde.
Mingyu howls with laughter at that, his tall frame doubling over as he laughs at his friend. You’re mentally cursing at Soonyoung three times over as Wonwoo’s lips press into a thin line, the man sending a look of disapproval towards Mingyu who was holding his body up against Soonyoung, trying to calm himself down from the amusement. Your body grows hot with embarrassment as you run a hand over your face, wanting nothing more than for the ground to swallow you up.
“Yes,” Wonwoo finally says, deep voice rumbling with no amusement. “I’m the asshole boss.”
Soonyoung lands another playful tap against his friend’s chest, pointing an accusing finger at him.
“Give her a break, Wonu. She needs a vacation,” he pauses, looking between the two of you. “You both do.”
With one last love tap from Soonyoung, the blonde all but bounces back to the dance floor, Mingyu and Joshua in tow – leaving you and Wonwoo alone.
The tension in the air makes your throat dry, your shoulders sinking in embarrassment as you offer your boss an apologetic look.
“Mr. Jeon –”
“Your asshole boss, huh?”
Wonwoo’s harsh tone makes you want to crawl under a rock, shame filling your body, and your gaze sinks to the floor as you guiltily break eye contact.
‘He’s gonna fire me…’ You thought to yourself, trying to keep the panic that was seeping through your body at bay. ‘He’s going to tell me to pack my desk up and to never step foot into the building after tomorrow. That he’ll find a better assistant - one more compliant and who doesn’t talk back. Someone who says yes with no questions asked –’
“I suppose I deserve that.” Your head snaps back up, eyes wide with surprise, and there’s a ghost of a smile playing on his lips, brown eyes glinting in amusement. “Especially after all I’ve put you through this week.”
Your mouth opens and closes like a fish out of water, completely taken aback by the compliment, and you struggle to conjure a reply in your scattered brain as you stutter in response.
“I –” you flush, embarrassed at the lack of words you can conjure. “Mr. Jeon –”
“Wonwoo,” he corrects.
There’s a playful glint in his eyes as he takes a step closer to slide across from where you sat in the booth.
“At the office, I’m Mr. Jeon,” he smiles softly. “But when we’re outside of work or if it’s just you and I, it’s Wonwoo.”
Oh, fuck…
There’s heat pooling in your stomach at his words, thousands of tiny butterflies fluttering in its depths, and suddenly it’s a thousand degrees hotter in the club than it already was. Your palms are clammy, sweat beading at the nape of your neck, and you manage to send him back a small smile as you nod in acknowledgement.
“Okay,” you concede, lifting your glass to take a sip. “Wonwoo.”
There’s a sharp inhale on his end, broad shoulders stiffening for a millisecond, before he offers you a kind smile. You watch as he takes a sip of his champagne, his gaze never breaking from yours.
“So you’re the unfortunate one who’s had to deal with Soonyoung for all of these years,” he smirks, teasingly. You can’t help but to laugh at that before shaking your head at his words.
“He’s really not as bad as you think,” you defend. “In a way it’s almost as if I’m taking care of a child.”
A beautiful, melodic deep rumble escapes him and you’d be lying if you said that the low timbre of his voice didn’t send a wave of heat straight in between your legs, instinctively making you subtly shift to crossing them underneath the table.
“Perhaps that is enough reason to offer a compensation for your efforts,” he drawls. “Maybe even a raise.”
You quirk an eyebrow at that, sending the man a playful glare.
“Don’t tease me,” you warn, grinning. “I might just take you up on that.”
Wonwoo smirks, butterflies erupting in your stomach as your eyes glanced down at his lips. A wave of desire rushes through you as a fleeting thought of what they would feel like against your skin runs through your mind, your throat going dry as an image of you and Wonwoo tangled in bedsheets flashed in your mind. Immediately you’re clearing your throat and tearing your gaze away, shame flaming your cheeks as you take a sip from your drink.
“How do you know Soonyoung?” You ask, making Wonwoo smile at the question.
“I had a project with his father in the past,” he explains. “Soonyoung was just starting out as his assistant and was learning the ropes of his father’s company. Naturally, I took him under my wing and became his business mentor. I know how hard it is to work in a company that’s family owned. Our fathers don’t go easy on us despite us being their sons.”
“From what it sounds like,” you began, smirking at him. “It seems to me as if you also need to be compensated as well for your efforts.”
Wonwoo laughs, his glasses sliding down the bridge of his nose slightly as he leans forward.
“Maybe Soonyoung’s right,” he grins. “Maybe we both need a vacation.”
Your eyebrow quirks at that, eyes glinting in curiosity as you peer at him.
“Are you offering me time off?”
“Maybe someday,” he teases, eyes shining mischievously. “The best I can offer you right now is a dance with me.”
Your breath catches in your throat, and the butterflies take flight once more, your eyes widening in surprise before you catch yourself. Clearing your throat, you take another sip of your drink before looking up at him teasingly.
“I didn’t realize you danced,” you jest.
Wonwoo pushes himself out of the booth before holding his hand out to you, silently offering. The warmth of his hand enveloping yours has electric shocks running down your spine as he helps you up, his hand cautiously placed on the small of your back as he leaned down towards you.
“I usually don’t,” he affirmed, a wild glint in his eye as he leaned closer to your ear. “But I can make an exception when it involves certain people.”
Had he not been guiding you, you were pretty sure your knees would’ve buckled from his comment, heat flooding your cheeks as you let him move you towards the dance floor. Playful banter and teasing comments had always been a part of the dynamic, given the frequent amount of time the two of you were around each other, harmless flirting here and there wasn’t unnatural. But this is the first time you were seeing him – that you were really looking at him – outside of an office setting.
The normal Wonwoo who was holed up in his office all day; barking orders and commands to his staff, the man who gives you endless tasks left and right, the man who sat rigidly by your side in countless board meetings and projects. The man who you thought was nothing but a ball of stress stuffed in a business suit now stood in front of you with nothing holding him back as he pulled your body flush against his. He’s carefree, a warm glow in his eyes, and he’s offering you the sweetest smile as the pair of you settle within the crowd. The usual long sleeves of his button down are rolled up neatly to his elbow, his broad frame nearly making the buttons protrude from the seams, and you’re silently wishing the heavens above to give you even the slightest peek of toned skin beneath the fabric.
His hand rests comfortably on your lower back, slender fingers almost gripping the fabric of your dress as the two of you danced amongst the crowd of people. The dim lighting casts his face in an exquisite shadow, the defined angular shape of his jaw accentuated in the low lights, making his sharp features appear even more striking beneath the thick rims of his glasses. He’s beautiful, almost godly like, and the heat of his toned body against yours is making your head spin.
For the first time, you’re seeing him.
Your hand is clasped in his as he twirls you out, then back into him, a devastatingly beautiful smile painted on his lips replacing the usual scowl he wore in the office. You can’t help but to mirror him, beaming in delight as the two of you dance.
“Who would’ve thought Mr. Jeon Wonwoo, big bad CEO, would be such a great dancer,” you tease him, relishing in the low rumble of his laugh. You watch as his nose crinkles with the action, your heart blooming in your chest as he leans in closer towards you.
“That’s not all I’m good at.”
If his words weren’t enough to send a flood of heat through your body, it was the goddamn wink he sent you that did it. You can’t even articulate words as Soonyoung beckons the two of you over to dance with the group, Wonwoo reluctantly letting you go as the two of you made your way over to them.
You weren’t sure when the exact moment was that the line between you and your boss had begun to shift into something else, something far beyond a workplace partnership — but after tonight, it was an inevitable change.
And you’d be lying if you said you weren’t curious to see where it went next.
You felt the presence before they had even uttered a word, your gaze shifting from your computer to the smirking face of the man in front of you as he leaned against your desk.
“So,” he began. “Are we going to talk about it?”
You gave him a blank stare.
“Talk about what?” You asked, even though you knew what he was hinting at.
“C’mon, (Y/N),” Mingyu whines, standing upright to bounce on his feet. “We can’t not talk about what happened the other night.”
You purse your lips at his words as you rub your temples in annoyance. You knew you couldn’t avoid the situation in its entirety, but you also knew that addressing it would imply that there was something… there to begin with — and there wasn’t. At least, not yet.
“Nothing happened,” you reply curtly. “I was out with friends.”
Mingyu scoffs, arms crossing over his broad chest as he gives you an incredulous look.
“So we’re not going to talk about how the two of you were practically fucking on the dance floor.”
You blanched at that, eyes widening in surprise, and you’re casting a weary glance towards the open door behind you. Wonwoo sits idly in concentration at his desk, the man scribbling something down on his notepad.
“Lower your voice,” you hissed at Mingyu once you turned back towards him. “He’s right there.”
“You didn’t deny it,” Mingyu beams.
“We were just dancing!” You defended. “It was harmless. And innocent, contrary to popular belief.”
“Innocent?” He mocks, raising an eyebrow. “He doesn’t just dance with anyone, (Y/N). Especially not like that.”
You try to ignore the sudden presence of fluttering in the pit of your stomach, the butterflies flying freely through your body as your mind flashes back to the dance you had shared with your boss. The warmth of his body against yours, the gentle brush of his lips against your ear, the teasing words exchanged… It had all been too much to process in one night — and, yet in the same breath, not enough.
“Well whether it was or not, nothing’s going to come from it. Nothing can come from it.”
A look of sympathy flashes across Mingyu’s face at that, his round eyes narrowing with pity.
“You never know,” he reassured with a gentle smile. “There’s always a chance that something could happen.”
You scoff at that, rolling your eyes as you turn back to your computer.
“Not as long as he’s my boss,” you muttered.
Mingyu opened his mouth to retort when a throat clears from behind the two of you. Almost immediately you’re whipping around to see Wonwoo leaning against the doorframe of his office, an accusing glance being thrown towards you and Mingyu as he pushes his glasses up the bridge of his nose.
“Is there a problem?”
Wonwoo’s voice is harsh, sharp eyes shifting between the two of you before he’s zeroing in on your gaze. His shoulders are straightened in a tension and you bite back a whimper as you watch the taut muscles of his chest strain against the confinements of his button down.
“N- no, sir,” you stuttered out, shaking your head. “Mingyu just had a question regarding the merger with Mr. Choi.”
Wonwoo’s lips press into a thin line, his jaw clenching as his gaze shifts to Mingyu, the aforementioned man peeling himself from your desk as he straightens his posture.
“That’s right,” Mingyu agrees. “I had a quest —“
“The next time you have a question about anything regarding business matters you come see me,” Wonwoo cuts him off with a harsh glare. “Ms. (Y/N) has enough on her plate. She doesn’t need you bothering her too. Nor do I appreciate you distracting her from her work.”
There’s a brief flash of shock dancing across Mingyu’s face, his big eyes widening at his friend’s words, before realization takes its place and he’s grinning like a kid in a candy shop.
“Oh,” he beams. “I get it.”
Wonwoo’s eyes narrow in a scrutinizing gaze while you stare at your boss, mouth slightly ajar from his earlier statement.
“Mr. Jeon it’s really not a big deal —“
“You’re dismissed, Mingyu. (Y/N), my office. Now.”
The contrast between the Wonwoo you had seen at the club compared to the one that was in front of you now was like night and day. The other night he had been carefree, lively, and sweet. The man that stood in front of you now was cold. The playful twinkle in his eyes had completely vanished, instead, replaced by a harsh glare as he all but stomped back into his office.
You’re completely ridden speechless as you watch your boss’s retreating form, a painful tug at your heartstrings has a frown forming on your lips.
Mingyu lets out a low whistle.
“I seem to have awakened the beast.”
Your head snaps back to look at his smirking face, a knowing glint in his eyes as he nods his head in the direction of Wonwoo’s office.
“Maybe true love’s kiss can melt his cold heart.”
Without thinking you’re reaching for your pen before chucking it in Mingyu’s direction, a bark of a laugh escaping him as he’s running away. Grumbling under your breath, you make a mental note to get him back later when a shout comes from behind you.
“(Y/N)!”
Your blood runs cold at the harsh call of your name, worry flooding your body as you hastily push yourself from your desk to make your way to Wonwoo’s office, panic running through you as you cross the threshold.
“Close the door behind you,” he orders, head nodding in the direction of the door, and you’re on high alert as the open barrier becomes sealed, leaving the two of you in his office. Alone.
Nervously you’re taking a seat in front of him, your ankles crossing as you sit with your shoulders tensed up. Wonwoo’s stare makes you want to curl up into a ball and hide, the intensity of his gaze sending goosebumps of anxiety up the nape of your neck.
Wonwoo inhales a sharp breath, nostrils flaring as he exhales, and he’s gritting his jaw as his hands fold in front of him on his desk.
“Is Mingyu bothering you?”
Confusion sweeps over you as your eyebrows furrow.
“Bothering me?” You ask, and you watch as Wonwoo’s knuckles turn white from clenching his hands together.
“Bothering you,” he says again. “Flirting with you? Asking you on dates? All of the above?”
Your eyes widen at his questions, your hands coming up in defense as you shake your head.
“No!” You deny. “None of the above. Absolutely none of the above.”
There’s a slight release of tension in his shoulders but his stoic face remains the same.
“If he was you would tell me, right?” He asks, giving you a pointed look.
“Of course,” you affirm. “If anyone was bothering me I would let you know.”
Wonwoo’s gaze stays locked on you as he digests your words, the man slowly unclenching his hands before he nods in response.
“Good,” he relents. “I wouldn’t want to lose one of my best employee’s because he doesn’t know how to control himself.”
You can feel the heat dance across your cheeks at his implication, embarrassment filling your body as you sink into the chair further.
“It’s never been like that,” you reassure him. “Only friendly banter.”
Wonwoo nods, accepting your words.
“I believe you,” he reaffirmed.
A tense silence falls over the two of you, the air thickening around you as you swallow the nervous lump that had formed in your throat from when he had called you into his office. His intense stare has you breaking eye contact in an effort to gain your composure, a ragged breath escaping you as your gaze zeroes into a random plank of wood on his floor.
“Is that all you needed from me?” You ask meekly, not lifting your head to look at him.
There’s a brief silence before Wonwoo responds.
“How’s the project going?”
Right… the project, of course.
Straightening your posture, you reluctantly lifted your head from the floor and met Wonwoo’s gaze once more. Those damned butterflies return instantly when you see the corners of his lips turn up into a small smile.
“Good,” you breathed out. “I’m finishing up the presentation for our next monthly board meeting. We’ve been making a lot of progress since we met up with Mr. Choi —“
“Have you eaten yet?” Wonwoo cuts you off, making your eyebrows furrowed in confusion at the sudden question.
“Not yet,” you respond. “I was planning to work on a few more things before I took a break.”
“You should join me for lunch,” he offers a gentle smile, a complete contrast to the frown he had when you had first walked into the office.
“I — I have so much to do, Mr. Jeon —“
“I’m sure it can wait,” he reassures you. “Besides, you can’t work on an empty stomach.”
Pushing himself away from his desk, Wonwoo stands up and throws his blazer on as he nods his head in the direction of the door.
“As your boss, I’m requesting that you have lunch with me.”
You frown at that.
“That’s not fair,” you mutter. “You know I can’t say no to you.”
“Precisely,” Wonwoo grins as he helps you up from the chair.
Your lips pursed in thought as you stared at the man before you. Not even ten minutes ago he was a huffing and puffing mess, anger flaring in his cold dark eyes. Now he stood in front of you with that same mischievous glint in his irises like the other night. The constant back and forth between his emotions is giving you a metaphorical whiplash.
“Fine,” you concede. “But you’re buying.”
Wonwoo doesn’t smirk in response, nor does he wave you off. Instead he’s tipping his head back and letting out a hearty laugh, the deep rumble making your heart pound in your chest as you stare dumbfoundedly at the man in front of you.
“I can work with that,” he agreed, beaming. “We can discuss more about this presentation as well.”
The dimly lit restaurant you’re taken to does nothing to rid you of the untamable butterflies fluttering wildly in the pit of your stomach as you sit across from Wonwoo. You can feel the nervous jitters in your body as you try not to tremble beneath your boss’s gaze while you try to keep your attention focused on the menu, your teeth biting into your bottom lip as you stoically stare at the page.
The romantic ambience of the restaurant is telling of itself; low lighting, soft music playing, and a waiter filling a glass of wine for you — a glass of which Wonwoo approved for you to drink despite you being on the clock. A drink which, also, did absolutely nothing for your nerves.
“See anything you like?”
Wonwoo’s deep voice pulls you from your inner turmoil and you’re reluctantly breaking your gaze from the menu to look up at him. His glasses are perched comfortably on the bridge of his nose, his lips offering a gentle smile, a smile that you can’t help but to let your gaze fall on as you stare at the curve of his Cupid’s bow.
“A few things,” you murmur, nodding at him. “There’s so many options.”
“Well,” he pauses, gesturing towards the menu. “If you trust me, I’ll order for us.”
Your eyebrow piques in interest at that, a teasing look dancing in your eyes.
“Yeah?” You muse, humming softly. “You think you know me that well?”
Wonwoo smirks as he places his menu down, his sharp eyes giving you a once over that sends the butterflies in your stomach into a frenzy.
“I’d like to think so,” he responds, giving you a knowing look.
Crossing your arms over your chest, you give him a playful look back as you lean against the cushion of the chair.
“What’s my favorite color?” You ask.
His smirk doesn’t falter at your question.
“Purple,” he answers. “More specifically, a light purple. Like lilac or lavender.”
You blanched at that, not expecting him to actually answer, let alone know the answer.
“Oh,” you said quietly, blinking in surprise.
“You mentioned to me once that the colors represent kindness and innocence. Two things which you felt represented both yourself and what you wanted people to gain from you.”
Your heart soared in your chest at his words, a feeling of gratitude sweeping over you as you offered him a shy smile.
“You remembered,” you murmured, making Wonwoo smile in response.
“I remember a lot of things about you.”
Heat rushed to your cheeks. His response had rendered you speechless and you were utterly grateful for the waiter’s timing as he came back to your table to take your orders — which Wonwoo took care of. You could barely register what was exchanged between the two as you stared at your boss in admiration, completely melting on the spot from his response.
Your eyes are still locked on the beautiful man in front of you as the waiter takes both of the menus, your heart beating rapidly against your ribcage as the two of you are left alone once more. The flickering flame of the candle casts a shadow along Wonwoo’s face, the dim lighting accentuating his strong jaw and sharp eyes as he leans forward on his elbows.
Blinking out of your daze, you swallow the lump of nervousness before clearing your throat.
“So the project is going well,” you began, taking a sip of your wine. “Mingyu has been working on the potential projections of the outcome and I’ve got the PowerPoint almost finished. We’re a little past the halfway point now.”
Wonwoo says nothing. He only offers you a small smile in response.
“I think we can really pull this off,” you continued. “Between your brilliant business mind and Mr. Choi’s ability to persuade pretty much anyone, the two of you are in the midst of creating something amazing.”
There’s a mischievous glint in Wonwoo’s eyes as he looks at you, the smile on his face not faltering once.
“You think I’m brilliant?”
You flush at his words before shifting nervously in your seat, lifting your glass of wine to your lips as you take another sip.
“I mean,” you purse your lips, giving him a knowing look. “You wouldn’t be the CEO if you weren’t.”
You spot the slightest clench in his jaw as his soft features harden at your words.
“I’m the CEO because my father stepped down,” he pointed out. You frown at that.
“Mr. Jeon —“
“Wonwoo,” he cuts you off sharply.
His brash tone deters you for a moment, hurt flashing in your eyes before you mask it with confusion.
“What?” You ask meekly.
“Do you remember what I said at the club?” He asks, the harsh tone still evident in his voice. “Do you remember anything from that night?”
“Of course I do,” you defended yourself. “I wasn’t even tipsy.”
Wonwoo’s jaw sets as he grits his teeth.
“Then you should remember that I said to call me by name when we’re alone.”
And just like that the butterflies are back with a vengeance — only to multiply tenfold when he leans across the table to grab your hand in his, lacing your fingers together before resting it back onto the table.
“Wonwoo…”
His name falls from your lips in a hushed voice, heat pooling in your stomach as he squeezed your hand in reassurance.
“You’re nervous,” he points out, smirking. You frown at that.
“Can you blame me?” You ask incredulously, gesturing towards your linked hands. “I’m holding hands with my boss.”
“You’re holding hands with your friend,” he corrects. “A friend who just so happens to be your boss. A boss that you’re also on a date with.”
Your mouth slacks at that, eyes widening in shock as you make a move to draw back only for him to tighten his grip so you can’t move away from him. His thumb sweeps over the back of your hand in an effort to soothe you but it only makes the heat in your belly spread to your lower body, your thighs clenching in response as you look away bashfully.
“I thought this was a business lunch,” you mutter, cheeks aflame with embarrassment. Wonwoo lets out a low chuckle.
“Did you not want this to be a date?”
Your face falls at that.
“It’s not that I don’t want this to be a date,” you reassure him. “It’s that… this can’t be a date.”
“And why not?” He asks, eyebrows raised in question. You blink at him.
“You’re my boss,” you reiterate. “Whether we’re friends outside of work or not you’re still my boss, Wonwoo.”
Wonwoo stares back with a blank look on his face.
“I fail to see your point, (Y/N).”
Before you could reply, the waiter had returned with both of your plates of food, placing them in front of each of you before refilling your wine glass. Wonwoo’s sharp gaze is still locked on yours, his grip on your hand refusing to let go, and he watches intently as you take a long swig of the alcohol. Your nerves are completely shot, mind going haywire from the conversation, and the wine is only intensifying the heat between your legs as you try to collect yourself.
And then he’s bringing your hand up to his lips, pressing a gentle kiss to your skin. Your breath hitches and Wonwoo catches it, smirking in response.
“Eat your food, sweetheart. It’s going to get cold.”
The bustling diner is thriving with patrons as you sit with Soonyoung and Joshua in a booth at the corner of the room, the two of them engaging in an animated conversation as you sit idly across from them, your mind completely far off from where you were currently at.
Ever since the night of Soonyoung’s party it’s like your world has been flipped upside down and spinning on its axis. Wonwoo has gotten more brazen in his advances; leaving you flowers on your desk, buying you lunch, fleeting touches of hands brushing as you pass each other in the hallway. The actions are subtle, most of the other employee’s not seeming to catch onto the attraction between the two of you, all except Mingyu who has decided to make it his life mission to get the two of you together.
After finding out that Wonwoo had taken you out to lunch (and called it a date) or much less, finding out that his boss had subtly confessed his feelings to you, he’s taken it upon himself to play Cupid — much to your dismay. Because even though your feelings for Wonwoo were strong, and grew more and more with each romantic gesture, the fact of the matter is, he's still your boss.
A heavy sigh breaks your friends from their conversation, two pairs of concerned eyes looking at you from across the table. Joshua frowns, Soonyoung’s eyebrows furrow. The former leans across the table to place a gentle hand on yours, and a part of you longed for it to have been Wonwoo’s in its place instead.
“What’s going on in that head of yours, (Y/N)?” Joshua asks softly, making you heave another sigh.
“I’m falling in love with somebody I can’t have,” you muttered, making Soonyoung’s eyes widen.
“Honey…” Joshua coos, rubbing your hand in soothing circles.
Your heart twinges with hurt as your face falls, shoulders slumped as a frown forms on your lips.
“I don’t even know how this happened,” you began, pouting. “One day he was my boss… the next he’s the man I want to come home to every night.”
Realization sweeps over Soonyoung’s face at your words, his lips parting in surprise.
“Wonwoo?” He asks, making Joshua’s eyebrows furrow in question. “You’re in love with Wonwoo?”
“How do you know it’s Wonwoo?” Joshua counters, but the look on your face is enough confirmation.
“Wonwoo is my boss,” you clarify. “I didn’t know he was friends with Soonyoung until he showed up to his party.”
“Oh,” Joshua mutters.
“And I’m not in love with him,” you glared at Soonyoung. “Not yet, at least. Although if he keeps getting me flowers and buying me food it’ll be a different story.”
“He’s what?!” Soonyoung gapes, open mouthed.
A wave of heat washes over your cheeks, embarrassment flooding your body as you bashfully look down at the table.
“He’s been getting me gifts,” you admitted softly. “I’ll come into the office in the morning to either a bouquet of flowers or a nice warm meal waiting for me. Sometimes both if he’s in a good mood.”
Soonyoung’s shock doesn’t falter, Joshua gives you a knowing look.
“Sounds like the feelings are mutual,” Joshua points out. “Maybe you should give him a chance —“
“He’s my boss, Shua,” you counter. “That’s a line I’m not allowed to cross.”
“Maybe you should cross it,” Soonyoung cuts in.
“I can’t —“
“(Y/N), I love you. We’ve been friends since we were in diapers, I wouldn’t steer you wrong. So believe me when I say that in the years that I’ve known Wonwoo, not once has he ever gotten a woman a gift, let alone tried to pursue one willingly.”
You freeze at that.
Knowing how invested he is with his job, it makes sense that Wonwoo wouldn’t have time to date nor be able to court a woman. But, in the same token, nobody that gorgeous and down to earth couldn’t have had someone he was the least bit interested in.
“I don’t know if I believe that,” you mutter. “Have you seen him? There’s gotta be women wanting him from every corner of the world.”
“Women may want him, honey, but he wants nothing to do with them,” Soonyoung pauses, a knowing look on his face. “Unless it’s you, apparently.”
Joshua chuckles at that, a reassuring smile on his face as he reaches over to place a hand on yours.
“Just think about it,” he suggests, encouragingly. “Weigh out the pro’s and con’s and go from there.”
Nodding in acknowledgement, you opted to stay silent and focus on the menu instead, pushing away any thought of your boss and his feelings towards you as you ignore those damned butterflies in your stomach.
PROS:
Despite his rigid appearance, he’s quite kind
He listens to me when I have ideas and encourages me to speak up in board meetings despite my lack of status
He remembers things about me – which is still utterly baffling
He’s patient
He’s handsome (unfairly so)
Gift giving as a love language… along with words of affirmation (both a plus for me - dating or not)
CONS:
He’s my boss
The list stares at you with a daunting realization that, yes, the pro’s absolutely outweighed the single con that you could come up with – and, yet, in the same token, so much was at stake if you made the decision to further your relationship with your boss. With every pro that you could list, the thought of ‘He’s my boss’ still outnumbered the choice that your heart had been dying for you to make.
A heavy sigh escapes you as you stare at the word document, lips pursed in thought as your mind flutters back to the conversation you had with Joshua and Soonyoung.
“Maybe you should cross it.”
The line between you and Wonwoo had always been slightly blurred. Between endless flirty compliments and comments and looks that a boss and his assistant should not have been giving to one another, you knew that it had never just been a workplace friendship between the two of you. Not when you would spend countless nights wondering what it would be like to have your boss laying next to you, broad muscly arms enveloping you in a warmth you never wanted to be free of.
And that was what scared you.
“What is that?”
You nearly jump out of your skin at the sound of Wonwoo’s voice behind you, a shriek escaping you as you click on your email app to pop up instead of the word document, heat flooding your cheeks with embarrassment as you turn to meet the curious gaze of your boss.
“My grocery list,” you reply, lying through your teeth. “I have to pick up a few things on my way home and I didn’t want to forget anything so I wrote it down.”
Wonwoo peers curiously, sharp eyes resting underneath the thick rims of his glasses, and there’s a smirk of amusement on his face as he crosses his arms over his chest.
“Well I don’t think you have to worry about them tonight,” he replies, coolly. Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion at his words.
“What do you mean?”
“We’re going out tonight,” he clarified, his smirk widening when surprise floods your face.
“Going… out?” You ask, dumbly. “Going out where?”
“Well, since Soonyoung found out that I’m your boss, he’s taken it upon himself to guilt trip me into not only going out tonight, but to bring you along as well.”
A groan escapes you at that, your hand running over your face with embarrassment as Wonwoo chuckles lightly.
“Oh, god,” you whined. “Mr. Jeon I’m sorry –”
“Wonwoo.”
Your gaze meets his amused one as you lifted your head to look at him.
“Wonwoo,” you corrected, looking around the empty office. “He doesn’t understand the term ‘boundaries’ sometimes.”
“I know,” he grins. “Which is why I told him we would both be there.”
You frown at that, looking back towards your computer as you stared at the word app, your mind fluttering to the list that you had been working on.
“I –” you paused, biting the inside of your lip. “I have so much work to do –”
“Sweetheart, I'm offering you a break,” he laughs quietly, looking at you with an expectant look. “Are you really going to turn that down?”
‘He’s your boss, (Y/N). Say no. You know what can happen if you’re stuck with him.’
“Fine,” you concede, sighing softly. “But I have to run home and get changed.”
If the thought of another night out with your boss didn’t already make your heart race, it was the words he whispered to you after that definitely made heat pool between your thighs.
“Why?” He asks, quirking an eyebrow. “You’re beautiful already.”
Your eyes widened at his compliment, your throat tightening, and you swallowed the lump that had formed out of nervousness before waving him off.
“If you say so,” you dismissed, shutting down your computer. Wonwoo only beams, nose crinkling with happiness as he offers you his arm.
Wonwoo was glued to your side the moment the two of you had stepped into the club, his hand resting on your lower back as he carefully guided you through the crowd. Bodies were pressed against each other without a care in the world, the party goers dancing without thought as they enjoyed their night, and a part of you envied them — envying that they didn’t have to think about the man currently pressing you against him as he shuffles the two of you towards your friends.
The heat from Wonwoo’s body completely engulfs you as he pressed himself against you, the hand that was on your back now sliding to the dip of your hip as he pulls you into him. The scent of his cologne fills your senses and draws you to him, your body molding into his as he leans down to press his lips against your ear.
“Soonyoung is right there,” he points, gesturing towards the bubbly blonde now dancing with Seungkwan. “I’ll meet you over there. I’m getting us drinks.”
Before you can say anything, a chaste kiss is being pressed to your cheek. Your eyes widened as your boss slithered through the dancing bodies, shock filling you at the gentle brush of his lips on your skin as your mind tried to wrap around the fact that your boss had just kissed you. Butterflies erupted in the pit of your stomach at the gesture, your heart speeding up in your chest, and you can only suck in the shyness of the blush now heating your cheeks before you’re making your way towards your group of friends.
Joyful cheers erupt from the bunch as you come into view, glasses being held up in a toast as they acknowledge your arrival. You’re met with Soonyoung’s beaming face as you take a seat beside him, the bubbly blonde wrapping an arm around you as he gives you a one armed hug.
“From now on I’m just going to force Wonwoo to hang out with me,” he says, jokingly. “That seems to be the only way I can get you here!”
A small laugh escapes you as you shake your head at your friend, rolling your eyes playfully.
“It was a low blow, Soonie,” you reprimand, giving him a look. “You can’t boss him around just so that we can accompany you while you’re out.”
Soonyoung pouts, batting his eyes.
“But you’re my friends,” he whines. “And the two of you work too much! It wouldn’t kill you to be somewhere that’s not the office or home every once in a while!”
“He’s got a point, honey,” Dokyeom interjects, looking distractedly behind you. “Wonwoo has you working crazy hours day in and day out. You need a break to decompress.”
“He’s right.”
The deep voice rumbling behind you makes you lift your head as your gaze falls on a smiling Wonwoo, the man placing your drink in front of you before sliding next to you in the booth. Your breath catches in your throat the moment his leg pressed against yours, the heat emanating off of him like he’s your own personal furnace. His sharp gaze is locked on yours as he reaches to lazily drape his arm around you, and you don’t have to look at Soonyoung to know that he’s sitting there smirking as he and Wonwoo lock eyes.
“Nice of you to join us, Wonu,” Soonyoung piped up. “I almost would’ve thought (Y/N) came here alone.”
“Now what kind of man would I be if I let my beautiful assistant come here by herself?”
A chorus of snorts falls upon the group, identical knowing looks on each one of their faces as they gazed upon you and Wonwoo. Heat floods your cheeks as you look down at the table bashfully, biting back a smile as Wonwoo pulls you into him.
Soonyoung can’t help but to smirk as he watches the two of you, a knowing glance being thrown towards your boss as he chuckles.
“I’ve never seen her so shy before,” he coos, making you groan in embarrassment. Wonwoo grins.
“Come to the office and you’ll see more of it,” he teases, and you playfully tap his shoulder in response.
“Stop,” you whined, pouting. “It’s not my fault you’re a shameless flirt.”
Wonwoo’s grin doesn’t falter, his eyes twinkling with amusement.
“Only with you, sweetheart.”
A unanimous coo falls from the group as they beamed at the two of you, taking in the flirty banter between you and your boss before deciding to give the two of you some time to yourselves. Soonyoung and Dokyeom are making a beeline for the dance floor while Joshua and Seungkwan head towards the bar, and you can already feel the nervous fluttering of those damned butterflies as Wonwoo’s soft gaze peers into yours.
A feline smirk is on his lips, his gaze resting underneath the thick rims of his glasses, and he’s leaning down towards your ear, lips brushing the outer shell and sending a wave of heat through your body.
“Would you like to dance with me?”
His voice is quiet, the low tone reverberating against your body, and you can’t help but to shiver as his breath fanned against your skin. You take a sip of your drink before turning your head to look at him, eyes shining playfully.
“You sure you don’t want to dance with anyone else?” You asked, half teasing half serious. “I’m sure there’s plenty of women who would gladly take you up on it.”
Wonwoo’s face hardens at your words, jaw clenching as he gives you a stern look.
“I don’t want anyone but you.”
Your breath catches in your throat at that, lips parting slightly in shock, and you peered into the earnestness of Wonwoo’s eyes as he reaches to grab your hand. The butterflies multiply tenfold as he lifts it to his lips, gently pressing a kiss to your knuckles before he’s wordlessly sliding out of the booth and pulling you up to him.
A protective arm wraps around your waist as your chest presses against his, his gaze never leaving yours as he rests his palm against your cheek.
“Dance with me.”
It’s a soft murmur rumbling from him and the intensity of his gaze can only make you nod in silence before allowing yourself to be willingly pulled to the dance floor.
Strong arms enveloped around your waist as you’re tugged into his broad chest, your arms looping around his neck, and the sultry song playing in the background does absolutely nothing for your nerves as your bodies move to the beat of the song. Wonwoo’s heated gaze is locked on yours, his sharp eyes framed underneath his glasses, and the intensity of him renders your mind thoughtless as a wave of heat flows straight to the pulsing core of your thighs as his body rolls into yours.
A soft mewl falls from you as you mirror his movements, your hands fisting in his hair as your hips swayed against his. Wonwoo grits his teeth as he leans down closer to you, his nose grazing yours as his hands clutched at the fabric of your shirt.
The heat between the two of you grows several degrees hotter as Wonwoo turns you in his arms, your back now flush against his chest, and his head dips to rest in the crook of your neck as your ass rolls into his groin. There’s a broken moan falling from him and he’s gripping onto you for dear life as he grinds his body into yours. Your hands are still fisted through his hair as his teeth graze against your skin, a whine falling from you as you tilt your neck to give him more access.
“Wonwoo…”
The sound of his name falling from you sends your boss into a frenzy, his hands clutching your body to him as he rolls his clothed cock against your ass. His teeth bite down on the juncture between your neck and shoulder as he sucks the skin into his mouth, marking you with a soothing flick of his tongue.
“Be mine,” he murmurs against your skin, drawing you out of your lust-filled haze. A frown paints itself across your lips as you try to turn in his arms, only to have Wonwoo tighten his arms and lock you in place.
“I can’t…” you whisper, and Wonwoo shakes his head as he nips against your collarbone.
“Don’t think about tomorrow, sweetheart,” he responds. “Think about now. Think about how we’re two people who very clearly care about each other.”
Your brain is screaming at you to pull away, to not risk anything more than what has already happened, but when his hot breath is fanning across your skin and his hardening cock is pressing up against your ass it’s hard to pull away. So, instead, you’re gaining the strength to turn in his arms and pull his head back down to your neck, fishing your hands through his hair as you arch into his touch. Wonwoo growls against your skin as needy hands drop to the curve of your ass, squeezing the flesh as your bodies grind to the beat of the music.
Everything around you all but disappears as the two of you melt into one another, not a care in the world as Wonwoo mouths hotly at your neck, tongue and teeth marking any visible inch of skin that he can latch onto.
‘Just for tonight,’ you thought to yourself. ‘I can indulge myself just for a night.’
If only it was ever that easy.
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I’ll Make You Love Me💋
Bfd!Joel Miller x f!reader
Main Masterlist | Joel Miller Masterlist
Summary: In Joel’s eyes you are an unpleasant person. Yet he has to pretend as if he would not want to get rid of you for Sarah’s sake, she loves you so much you are her best friend. Well Joel also feels terrible for the rather unethical thoughts he has of you.
Rating: 18+ mature content mdni !!!!!
Word count: 2.7k
Warnings: no y/n, introducing “Lucky”, female oc character, Sarah is 18, Lucky is 21, Joel’s age is not mentioned but he’s at least double Lucky’s age, degradation, humiliation, Dark, Joel is mean, he calls you Bitch/Slut/Junkie, spanking, dub-con, Daddy Kink, Manspreading hehe 😉, pervy!Joel, tears, Joel enjoys her tears, manhandling, hair pulling, weed consumption, alcohol consumption, a tiny fluffy moment, alludes to BJ, Joel can also be nice,
If I missed anything please let me know 🙏🏻
Authors note: this is for @toxicanonymity ‘s manspreading olympics. ❤️🔥
Shoutout to @cafekitsune and @saradika-graphics for the dividers ❤️
Big thank you to @jennaispunk and @joelmillerisapunk for beta reading ❤️🔥🌙
Disclaimer: English is not my first language so if you come across mistakes it might be due to that. I’m totally here for constructive criticism or feedback on how to improve. In general I appreciate comments, likes and reblogs greatly 💋
Songs I listened to while writing:
What You Do by James Gillespie
Bad Girls by M.I.A
Maneater by Nelly Furtado
Salvatore by Lana Del Rey
Sad Girl by Lana Del Rey
Waiting Game by BANKS
Into It by Chase Atlantic
You should feel bad for thinking of him in such a peculiar way. You should be ashamed for even considering him an option. He is totally off limits considering he’s much older, a busy mature man and most importantly Sarah’s Dad. Sarah the sweet girl that has been your Bestfriend for over 2 years.
It excited you in the beginning how much Joel hated your presence in his daughter’s life. He didn’t approve of this friendship ever since Sarah at 16 years old first brought you, her 19 year old friend, over for the first time.
In front of Sarah he tried his hardest to appear polite but you could see right through his facade from the beginning. And one evening when Sarah was already fast asleep you gave Joel a piece of your mind in the kitchen.
“Mister Miller let’s stop these silly games we both know what’s going on…you don’t like me and I couldn’t fucking care less.” You scoff and get off the counter, slowly drawing closer to Joel “You hate me so much but Sarah loves me soooooo much and imagine how upset she’d be to know that her Daddy doesn’t want her to be happy. Wouldn’t that be a shame,huh?” You question with an enticing head tilt.
Now you’re right in front of him, toe to toe with big bad imposing Joel Miller. You can feel the pulling in your lower belly from being so close and most importantly smelling his manly musky scent. You remind yourself that you gotta stay focused if you want to win this game.
You get even closer until your able to place your hands on his warm broad chest sliding them slightly upwards his shoulders. “What the hell r ya doin?” Joel hisses.
You lean up to whisper in his ear “Nothing, just letting you know that I eat guys like you for breakfast, I chew you up and spit you out. You’re not a threat to me, old man.” You pull back and give him a sinister sickly smile.
The wickedness in your tone causes goosebumps to prickle on his flesh.
You feed off of seeing him scared. You enjoy knowing what kinda effect you have on this usually so collected man.
“Goodnight Mister Miller, better start sleeping with one eye open from now on.” You giggle while skipping up the stairs.
That was the start of it all.
Now 2 years later with Sarah just having turned 18, Joel realizes that you two are gonna keep him on his toes even more than already.
The 18th birthday celebration was already a disaster, what Joel assumed would be a relaxed family gathering turned into you crashing the party and taking Sarah out, of course Sarah was excited so how could Joel say no.
Well when you two didn’t return at 12 pm like promised he admittedly got worried, but he wanted to trust Sarah so he tried to stay calm.
At 3 am he hears the screeching tires from some show off guys car and loud drunkish giggling. The princesses have officially arrived back home from their trip, almost 4 hours too late.
When Joel opens the front door he sees you and Sarah practically half draped over your shoulder stubbling up the starirs in sloppy drunk steps. You two are giggling and mumbling at each other in a language Joel does not understand, it certainly can’t be English.
You immediately glock his disgruntled face, the alcohol cursing through your system emboldens you so you haphazardly shove him out of the way. You sigh loudly and obviously annoyed at his antics all while herding Sarah up the stairs.
Joel cannot believe that after dragging Sarah off, taking her to god knows where, letting her drink and god forbid smoke… you still have the audacity to behave so entitled.
You put Sarah in danger and don’t feel an ounce of remorse. Joel hates your guts, in his eyes you are an entitled little brat that desperately needs to be put in her place.
Even though Joel hates you, he at the same time cannot keep his head clear of dirty images of your young and tight body. He thinks about the pool day where you showed up in the tiniest bikini he could think of.
Prancing around all while he had to resist the urge to just tear it off. You knew he was looking and he knew that you enjoyed his eyes flitting all over your enticing figure.
The both of you were tethering on a dangerous line, that could cause big trouble. How would Sarah feel knowing this is happening behind her back.
You constantly antagonize him like that wearing short skirts and tight shirts with no bra because apparently it’s too warm for that. Running into him, pressing your perky tits against his bicep in passing, coincidentally bending over in front of him. Joel was quickly approaching a breaking point, his resolve crumbling more and more with each time that he had to tug at his throbbing length all while thinking about you.
Joel clearly underestimated how much you’d play him and how much better at it you are. At this rate you’ll win this game. He however has a plan, that might even after everything still save him the success.
Joel only has to wait for the right time to attack, catch you off guard and use that to his advantage.
He gets pulled from his thoughts when he hears something that confuses him, you are singing and it sounds beautiful.
Joel creeps up the stairs as quietly as possible to not alert either of you.
The closer he gets to Sarah's door the clearer it becomes. Joel pushes the bedroom door open by only a few inches to get a look at the situation and it makes his heart roar. You sit on the side of the bed we’re Sarah is nicely tucked in, your body facing Joel but your eyes locked on Sarah’s face. Softly singing a lullaby in a language foreign to him while gently stroking over her cheeks, smoothing the hair out of her face, almost like a mother would with her baby. Something Sarah never got to experience in childhood since her mother left so early on.
Joel realizes that despite the rough exterior you put up there’s more to you than just a cold hearted homewrecker, you care for Sarah, you take care of her and watch over her wherever you two run off to. Joel feels gratitude for someone he admittedly doesn’t know a whole lot about.
Joel has seen enough and retreats back downstairs.
When you stumble into the living room to bid your goodbyes Joel looks like he’s deep in thoughts.
So you announce “Sarah is sleeping, make sure she drinks lotssssssss of water when she wakes up and takes more aspirin if needed. I’m out.”
You turn to walk off when Joel gets up “Hey ya sure bout walkin home now? I can drive ya.” He offers but you decline “Nah it’s alright Mr. Miller I can protect myself, I’ve always done it. Besides, why do you suddenly care,huh?“ you sarcastically laugh while slipping out of the house.
When you’ve turned away from him the snarky smile falls right off your face.
Joel actually felt somewhat sorry that night for the way he treated you all those times before.
That lasted until you decided to smoke weed with Sarah in his lil work shed that was situated in the back of his garden.
Joel would’ve realized either way if not by the smells wafting up his nostrils the moment he entered the shed later in the evening, then surely by Sarah’s unstoppable giggling, her slow mumbled speech or by the food flash she got.
When the two of you begged him to let you sleep over he eagerly agreed. Chalk it up to the weed that numbs your brain that this quick reaction didn’t seem suspicious.
Joel knows you will find him, you’ll see the open back door and walk right into his trap. You never sleep the night through when you spend it over at the Millers, he can hear you getting up and wandering around the house. Sarah on the other hand has got to be blessed with an extremely deep sleep.
The thought of overpowering you makes him smile giddily into the darkness of the shed.
As usual you wake up in the middle of the night, ever since being a little child the sleeping became a struggle and nothing works except tiring yourself out.
You get up out of Sarah’s huge plush bed, slip out into the hallway and down the stairs. There you immediately catch the wide open back door leading to the garden. Odd, Mister Miller would never in a million years leave that open.
You walk up to the sliding doors and when you stand in the threshold staring into the dark backyard you see that the shed is left open too.
Out of stupid curiosity you decide to investigate, not the smartest to perhaps walk right into a burglar who has a weapon but you don’t really care.
So you pat the way across the cold grass, it tickles the sole of your bare feet and the fresh midnight breeze actually feels awfully pleasant on your heated skin. Halfway you stop and glance upward at the beautiful full moon shining down on you.
After taking a deep breath you continue onward towards the shed.
When you reach the opening of the shed there’s really nothing you can see or hear. So you step further into it, carefully putting one foot in front of the other.
You feel like someone is watching you but you are unable to pinpoint where it’s coming from. It’s unsettling so you do something considerably stupid “Hello, hello is there anyone? Mister Miller are you in here?” You call out with a shaking voice.
No response.
A light flickering in the center of the room catches you off guard and now you can see him, the one that watched you.
Mr.Miller is sitting on a bar chair behind him is his working table, he leans his back against the edge of the table.
Your eyes immediately go to his slightly sweaty face -the Texas heat is unrelenting even in the middle of the night- he looks gorgeous illuminated by the tiny lamp glowing behind his shoulder on the cupboard. He’s smirking sinisterly at you.
You let your eyes wander over his broad shoulders that are clad in a green flannel. Inevitably your eyes slip down to his wide spread jeans covered thighs, they look so big and muscular.
He catches your staring and drops a hand on his thigh that slowly starts stroking up and down. Making you gulp audibly.
“M..M-..Mister M..Miller what are you doing here?” You stammer out.
“I was waitin for ya to come find me.” He huffs gruffly.
He continues “Close the door behind ya Lucky.”
You feel somewhat hypnotized by his slow calculated words as you, out of pure reflex, reach for the handle behind you.
As you shut the door, effectively trapping yourself with him he murmurs “That’s a good girl. Ya do know how to listen Lucky Girl.”
Hearing Joel call you a good girl in his signature dark molasses like voice had you squeezing your thighs together.
“Hmm ya like that baby, huh?” He inquires
“N..no, that would be fuckin weird.” You try sounding sincere but to no avail Joel has seen through you a long time ago.
“Lucky you are liar, a slut, a junkie..-“
You hiss “What did you just say?” While stepping closer to where he sits.
“Ya heard me right Lucky, you are a fuckin junkie, smoking weed in my shed with Sarah. Are ya outta your mind?” He throws back
“You gotta be kidding me, right? Big Bad Mr Miller is shitting his pants cuz of a bit of weed.” You wheeze.
“That’s enough.” He decides, getting up in one swift imposing movement. Suddenly he’s the one towering over you and he looks pissed.
He’s on you in the blink of an eye threading his hand through your hair grabbing a decent amount by which he pulls you with him.
“Ouch…ouch what the fuck let me go.” You huff while trying to get his hands out of your hair. But he doesn’t appreciate the disobedience and starts pulling even harder, which brings you to tears from the pain.
“Ohhh poor baby Lucky, look at those tears, ya not havin’ fun huh? That’s too bad darlin’ but I don’t care.”
He sits back down on the chair and in one swift motion pulls you over his thighs. Your belly rests on his crotch and your whole world is turned upside down.
“Clearly no one has ever taught ya a lesson, that’s why ya always behave like a bratty bitch.”
His free hand flits to your sleeping shorts and practically tears them off of you. At the ripping sound you yelp.
“Hmm look at that plump ass and those sweet lacy panties…ya always wear this slutty underwear when ya have a sleepover?” All while he’s groping you.
“What the hell are you doing Joel?”
“Aw is it not Mr.Miller anymore? Have we lost our manners lil girl? Or is there a better name for me, hmm?” He inquires.
For some reason you know exactly what he wants to hear but you're not inclined to give in. Yet.
“It’s fine baby ya don’t need to say it now, I’ll make you scream that goddamn name you fucking slut.” He pulls on your hair “Ya hear me bitch.?”
All you manage is a meak nod before he lets go off your face.
You can feel his warm and calloused hand on your cheek squeezing, stroking and poking. Then his hand is gone but not for long. You can’t even react. He's that fast in delivering the first smack to your behind.
“Ya gonna take what i give ya and behave cuz you wanna be a good girl, right? Ya wanna be my good girl,hmm?”
“Y..y-yes I do Mr.Miller.” You say defeated.
“Atta Girl. I think 10 should do it, for now, until ya feel like acting up again..”
He is unrelenting when it comes to punishing you, each time the impact is harder and more unexpected than the previous. You have to bite your lip in order to suppress a moan, even though it hurts it’s incredible. You can feel yourself becoming wet, with each time that his hand collides with your behind more slick gushes out of your pussy. At this point there must be a wet patch visible.
His bulge pressing against your stomach tells you how much this is affecting him too.
“Lucky I know ya try to hide it but I can smell how she’s leaking and if I check I’m sure I’ll find that cunt all sloppy for me, right?”
“Y..y-yes.”
“That’s what i thought.” And with that he continues the assault on your cheeks.
And it may be only ten but he makes them count, the blows are measured and hard. You guess your cheeks must be glowing at this point.
When he finally reaches 10 it feels like hours have passed since you decided to go wander around. He’s massaging your bruised ass. You finally feel like you’re getting a moment of peace but that couldn’t be further from the truth, because Joel threads his hand back into your hair and yanks you to face him.
He’s just staring at you, accessing you and then he kisses you.
It’s rough, teeth clashing, tongues swirling around, his hands urgently grabbing your face, your fingers tangled in his graying curls.
Though the kissing is over before it can escalate too far, Joel is once again pulling you by your hair, this time he’s more gentle, he pulls you off of his knees and pushes you down on them in the space between his spread thighs. You’re at eye level with his crotch now that looks painfully hard.
As you peek up at him through your lashes you muse “Looks like you got a problem, a big problem…Daddy. You want me to help you?” All while innocently tilting your head at him.
He grabs your face roughly “Shut up Lucky and put ya smart mouth to better use.”
“Don’t underestimate me Daddy. I’ll make you love me.” You say while giving him a cheeky wink.
Please don’t repost, copy, translate, or feed into any AI, thank you 🙏🏻
Npt: @toxicanonymity @aurorawritestoescape @milla-frenchy @joelmillerisapunk @joelslegalwhre @joelsdagger @tonysopranosrobe @luxurychristmaspudding @mountainsandmayhem @moonlitbirdie @joelalorian @sawymredfox @thundermartini @ace-turned-confused @almostfoxglove @pedropeach @joelsgreys @joelstummy @ovaryacted @iamasaddie @wintrwinchestr @littlemisspascal
#Joel Miller#manspreading olympics#Joel Miller Fic#bfd!joel#pedro pascal#pedro pascal characters#joel miller tlou#joel miller age gap#joel miller smut#joel miller fanfiction#joel miller x f!reader#kinda dark#My writing#Mina Writes
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STEP RIGHT UP FOR...
⸺ ANGEL'S EDITING CHALLENGE !!
✧ ﹒ opening words ﹕
✿ this event is the culmination of an idea i had for a pretty cool and unique event, but also to celebrate hitting 1000+ followers! i am eternally grateful for your continuous support, thank you to all my mutuals, anyone who's ever sent in a request, or interacted with any of my content. I'm so happy to be here and to have reached this milestone.
﹒ 𝜗 ₊ event info ﹕
✿ our event is a regular prompt event. the themes will be based around editing without certain elements that are supposed to be integral to edits. frames? coloring? characters? you can throw all those out the window because those will not be used here! for any further questions, please shoot me an ask.
𓎢𓎟𓎟𓎟 . ♡ . 𓎟𓎟𓎟𓎢
✿ the first 4 days will have "THIS or THAT" prompt questions and you must choose which theme you prefer to edit. the rest of the days have singular prompts for you to follow.
𓎢𓎟𓎟𓎟 . ♡ . 𓎟𓎟𓎟𓎢
✿ for days 5 and 6 (editing without time) you must finish your edit within 5 minutes. post proof that you made your edit in 5 minutes (such as showing the project's timestamp within your editing program). despite the time limit, you must still try to put effort and create something that resembles your usual edits.
𓎢𓎟𓎟𓎟 . ♡ . 𓎟𓎟𓎟𓎢
✿ tag me in your posts and use the tag #moon1010.
𓎢𓎟𓎟𓎟 . ♡ . 𓎟𓎟𓎟𓎢
✿ this event will run from 14th July to 28th July, giving you 2 weeks or 14 days to complete the event. the event starts in a day to give people time to prepare. i can accept late submissions. in the event a strike occurs while my event is ongoing, please send me your edits in my inbox and post them when the strike is over. you're free to skip a day, but do the days in order.
𓎢𓎟𓎟𓎟 . ♡ . 𓎟𓎟𓎟𓎢
✿ i'll choose the 1st, 2nd, and 3rd winners through spinning a wheel, with editors who finished all/most days of the event. 1st winner gets two layout sets and two graphics sets. 2nd winner gets a graphics set. 3rd winner gets a layout set. i may select extra winners who will get icon sets.
✧ ﹒ prompts list ﹕
➤ EDITING WITHOUT... 🎀
⸺ A CHARACTER !!
♡ DAY 1﹕ WINTER or SPRING
♡ DAY 2﹕ NIGHT or DAY
♡ DAY 3﹕ OCEAN or SKY
♡ DAY 4﹕ VINTAGE or MODERN
➤ EDITING WITHOUT... 🌸
⸺ TIME !!
♡ DAY 5﹕ a character that's most special to you
♡ DAY 6﹕ a character you heavily relate to
➤ EDITING WITHOUT... 🧁
⸺ FRAMES !!
♡ DAY 7﹕ a character with a design you dislike
♡ DAY 8﹕ a character you love from a media you hate
➤ EDITING WITHOUT... 💌
⸺ COLORING !!
♡ DAY 9﹕ a character from your earliest blog layout (that you can remember)
♡ DAY 10﹕ a character you want to retheme to
﹒ 𝜗 ₊ promo? ﹕
@lavendergalactic @kanakitos @sw-etheart
@kiochisato @murcuor @pien-chan
@doveish @whisfer @herrscherofmemories
@eskeys @promoblr @rookmeo
@meowrette @pink-sugar @c-ralique
@battampria @strawberrysnipes @thydragoness
@llocket @skaternpd @mischiefesse
@miaufleur @mischiefesse @akitoyatism
@mysterialss @editclub
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Lil rant abt Caine
Caine is just a lil guy, despite it all. From a design standpoint I thought I was gonna absolutely fucking hate looking at him because those chattering teeth toys make my skin crawl- but the art direction really helps make him look more appealing and whimsical than a disembodied pair of talking dentures sounds on paper.
The thing with Caine is I didn't initially like him that much after the pilot. While his interactions with Bubble were quite funny, that one episode left me feeling like he'd just end up being kinda one note or at the very least one note in a way that'd get on my nerves. Then everything changed when Pomni Wake Up Time to Go On an Adventure! attacked
The comedic timing throughout that announcement video was so fucking funny and thanks to his line deliveries and animation/model [?] upgrades- CAINE LOOKED AND SOUNDED SO ADORABLE!!
Legit it wasn't until this came out that I realized I actually could be on board with Caine as a character and it's been uphill from there. Episode 2 was better than the pilot not only comedically and visually but also in terms of showcasing just how actually unsettling Caine can be as an antagonist. Not because he's vengeful or malicious, but because he's so oblivious to how people work. His mind's always buzzing with terrible ideas and he's so so eager about these adventures, but at the end of the day he really really doesn't get the circus crew. Try as he might to include them, keep them engaged [ZOOBLE WAIT!], or even give them what they want [Exit doors] he doesn't realize how traumatic and distressing their current situation can be. The very nature of being trapped in a digital world is bad enough but it's especially rough here bc not only does its god have limited capabilities, you also are very well acquainted with him, and he can't fully understand your pain nor can he truly save you from it. He won't mourn your abstraction. He will not attend your funeral. He will not understand the distress of your arrival, nor the weight of your departure.
This isn't just sad from the pov of the circus gang, it's also very sad for Caine- not because i think he'll ever feel sad about it himself necessarily, but instead because the situation is sad. New members appear over and over, you craft adventures and games and distractions like [i'm assuming] they'd asked you to, but over and over, one by one, they abstract. They stop laughing at your jokes. They don't like you. They want you to leave them alone. It's confusing and maybe even inconvenient.
Where I'm hoping the series takes Caine is that this dissonance between Caine's intentions and the distress of the circus gang gets worse and worse and worse until something's got to give. I'm hoping that maybe at some point a character will try to sit down and talk with him and for it to either sorta get through to him but completely backfire in some form because he misinterprets what the others want from him OR i'd also be down for him to listen, but not understand any of it and proceed as tho nothing happened. I don't want Caine to come around really, it'd be interesting to see how Goose would go about having him come around to being a better host that empathizes more with humans, but personally I do prefer him to keep on keepin' on being this oblivious and eager antagonist.
My favorite Caine lines/line deliveries so far:
"You, my friend, stumbled into an incredible world of wonders, where anything can happen!…e-except for swearing."
"And here we have THE GROUNDS! Drown yourself in the digital lake, or engage in ridery at the digital carnival!"
"What do you think of XDDCC? You're right, terrible, LET'S TRY THAT AGAIN!"
"Kaufmo abstracted? Why didn't anybody tell me?"
"Bubble you can't say that"
"-ZOOBLE WAIT!"
"Why are you all just standing there?! The- The Canyon- C-Candy Canyon Kingdom needs you now!" [according to his VA, this was an actual line flub but hoo boy am i glad they use it bc it's hilarious]
"I know you guys love your NPCs, but if I start losing track of who's a human and who's an NPC, who knows...what. could. happen..."
That last line there specifically surprised me the most because up until he said that I was under the impression Caine was linked to every single NPC. I even thought he could see through their eyes if he so chose thanks to his "hundreds of all seeing eyes" line in the pilot. Him saying this here implies lots of things. Has Caine forgotten before? Is someone in the circus secretly an NPC ooooooooh~
"Who knows what could happen..."
Honestly, when Caine first said this I did immediately theorize Jax as being an NPC but now that it's been *checks calendar* three months since I watched episode 2, I don't think this is the case anymore. Jax being an NPC would be...something. Jax not knowing he's an NPC would be interesting [i like it when ppl's realities get shattered], but honestly I think this line was a way to telegraph to the audience that no Caine isn't actually all knowing. He didn't know Gummigoo was coming through that portal until he saw him with his own two eyes. My theory is that Caine is only able to teleport, create, censor, transform, and destroy the world around him, but isn't able to see all of it at once unless he tries to. I think Caine's default state is one where he only knows what he sees directly in front of him/what he himself has left waiting for someone else. And rather than implying someone in the gang is an NPC, I think that line in episode 2 was mainly implying Caine can be tricked, that it's possible to hide something from him, to surprise him even. Though I'm not opposed to an NPC we haven't met trying to join under the guise of being human, it'd potentially create some fun tension assuming the audience was given enough reason to care about them.
Jax is actually my favorite character in tadc, but i couldn't fill an entire post with things to say abt him. Caine seems to be- at least as of right now- the easiest of all the characters to try and wrap my head around. I'll probably have a lot more to say about Jax as he exists in canon as the episodes come out [EPISODE 6 MY BELOVED]
but uhhhh yeah, that's all the things i had to say abt Caine. Pls go watch/listen to the fansong Digital Land bye!
#tadc caine#tadc#i'm just here for the free food.#the amazing digital circus#digital circus#tadc theory#tadc thoughts
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being alive at the time i gleaned some general elements abt encanto but never actually heard we don't talk about bruno beyond awareness it existed popping off & i think i heard like the title recited off key off rhythm but in a way that indicates speak singing nonetheless lol so upon experiencing it it's like oh but it's the Verses? while the last refrain goes harder but prior to that it's comparatively underwhelming to said verses which feels appropriate like verses / pieces of a larger picture & that a "we don't talk about him" as a disappointing Lid on infinitely richer more characterful & dynamic "but: talking about him" instances. like well personally it'd be like um seven foot frame....anyway besides being able to firsthand go like oh damn Real (the kind of thing you know exists if alive at the time) it's like alright hang on lol. one thing when a core theme is yeah like "is it a refuge if 'especial' vulnerability ultimately gets pushed out rather than made safer" subset like the parties whose even observation of truths (problems) & drawing attention to them is seen as Ruining Things, like if you're painted as Making futures that aren't simply what's desired or reassuring rather than a guidance via just observing & sharing the truth. but then it's like whaddaya mean living in fear of bruno stuttering and stumbling you could always hear him sort of muttering and mumbling lmao like now that's just Association between the Truth Perceiving & Telling behavior & behavior that's just apparently distinctive of the same person. & like Not Accidentally when [what if people were magic] specifics are obviously primarily abt a metaphorical meaning & like, indeed it was made clear like oh this situation isn't Just b/c [boo we hate your prophecies] & that [an Ability that isn't directed towards what anyone Wants / is "weird" even by these magic standards] isn't Coincidentally given to someone who just so happens to already be "weird" in other ways & be set up to have a different perspective & be pushed away due to having the supposed "extra" vulnerability of unmet needs / insufficient support, same as someone who doesn't "correctly" have any kind of magic ability....like yeah banger and also like Oh Yeah Kind Of Devastating re: that metaphorical resonance allowing for like [set the metaphor aside] now hang on with this about this disabled family member lol. misinterpretation to The Ruinerrr / The Problemmm / The Maliciousss etc (i.e. the scapegoatinggg) despite their efforts likely entirely to the contrary. then despite like, efforts aside, Just Existing, always kind of muttering & mumbling like & what of it. & then like oh sorry weird pets. weird [auspicious for adaptable tenacious thriving surviving; either way simply creatures, existing] pets.
truly like As Is The Idea I'm Sure quickly becomes like hands behind back standing at the window Uh Oh Sisters musing on all the [disabled person] metaphorical & already literal elements there. blair witching it in contemplation like We've All Been There whether being so resented for the mere disruption of "existing in a group as the 'abnormal' odd one out" or like people talking shit abt anything associated w/you as soon as you've left the room, which is also made relevant like, this wasn't Only directed at this person when seemingly permanently gone, nor were they unaware / unaffected prior....pacing in the Musing parlor like things don't Have to be compared to billions but i only ever even see so many things & it's like billions sure is like "get scapegoated rword" & then said scapegoating is presented as only beneficial & we hate autists & even beyond that it's like, grabbing billions, Imagine If Things Meant To Be About Something Were About Something. quite a contrast when they are & furthermore like, deliberate thought & Care for [who gets scapegoated & why] & the truth of like, people getting pushed aside & out who have a key perspective & are primed / liable to come through for others similarly vulnerable & the supposedly Ruinous, Problems Generating disruptiveness is actually the strongest effort to make essential changes to a group. & come through with like, it'd be undermining thee point if it was "reassuring" us like oh haha people will be supportive b/c bruno will be more normal, so great that it Didn't like no, no Normality Reassurance(tm), presence of abnormalities(tm), Good, & everyone Can Deal b/c if you don't then it's pushing this person away, is exactly what happens, including even if they're still Around but are being mistreated b/c that is entirely part of that pushing away like anyone's victim blaming is ready to pounce at any time but if someone can't stand to stay / leaves b/c they can't see another option like that's not out of nowhere nor Regardless of what full support & flexibility they were getting lol. these Active Measures everyone loves so much, which are everywhere always & would include Staying & Trying To Make It Work & those efforts would be "disruptive" & resented & Bringing It On Oneself & etccc smh
that is to all say like. Woww when clearly basically the core thread was these beats of like, the crucial site of [thee scapegoated], & why that comes down on someone & how that plays out. endless ideas about how someone weird(tm) & disabled (&/or queer. but there's no Or here lol. & again like it's a Context like, to even be the one person without kids? likely not living up to "full" correct sexuality in that way alone; any oppression's logics of "inferiority" being logics of ableism, ready examples being that "inferior" race, gender, sexuality (& their experiences as people classed as inferior) all being pathologized as disordered) are seen & treated as someone Ruining Things & who cannot belong like whew. bracing. winding. which, i also recall like i was watching with headphones & during this one dialogue pause i was like "?? what's this Extra Sound i heard there" & had to go over it like twice before being hit upside the head like well it Was still the dialogue pause but it was also bruno Stuttering in a very quiet whisper for the duration of that pause before continuing like iiiiiiii x_x
#[sitting waiting right here] for billions to have its vulnerable weird scapegoated misfit outcasts actually band together lmao....#like Sure Doesn't b/c billions is like we all hate weirdos & we all love telling them to shut tf up & go away to die or w/e. correctly#can't believe ultimately the Different fund disappears w/o its scapegoat & the Correct ''weird'' char is full axe cap mode finally#& it's sure not a Comment when billions affectionately gives them their free heavenly reward & Ensure zero scapegoating consequences#the [imagine if something about something was about something] approach to Banished Relatives being thoughtful & loving like#& here you see how even As they're banished everything isn't Really fixed for it incl. that people aren't Really just happy he's gone#billions is like no we killed him And everyone has gladly & legitimately forgotten he exists (save the instant it's time to use him)#the hilarious(tm) tragedies surrounding rian like billions' can't make her ''care'' abt winston be anything save more violence#can't pretend rian was anything more than [again we all Know your nads like w/taylor like w/winston] bagina + dialogue source combo in s6#when it's still dimly relevant for prince in s7 but you miss Nothing re: rian if you have no idea that plotline exists#& speaking of actual ''weirdness'' rian was never allowed to have: the tragedy of the tension of Closeted Transness present on screen fr#just as billions has no idea / further willingness to let rian be so ''weird'' as to actually care abt winston or abt not being a bully Lol#meanwhile i figured like oh i'll like a scapegoat. did know ahead of time like bruno's just some guy; not even ''redeemable'' antagonist#but In Practice & w/all that beloved Disabledness & crucial appreciation like you Need this guy; the understanding is Key#like well ofc i would kill for him. ofc just constant like mhm go off king slay fire etc. god tier character cherished forever thanks#but then also like im sure a zillion [intention; inspiration; thoughts] going into Tfw Family Things characters; a zillion interpretions &#thoughts to follow like it truly is Arresting like this clarity on A Disabled Person In The Group like. much much to consider & whew.#reference point like when autistic ppl in some job see an obvious [problem to future mess] pipeline; so you know bruno madrigal. My Vision#When You're So Hated like hey i wanna live unseen w/my so hated little friends lol. just reread how to disappear completely never be found#when it's like grabbing people Who Cares if someone's being ''obviously'' disabled or weird just as how they are existing godddd#people get so mean like Who Cares just talk to them; be around them. some effort some mind your own business some You're Not Above Them#when it's obviously You like yeah. nonzero but limited applicability like [specifically my own nuclear family] but re: Weird; Disabled#as ever i'll Relate & be like but i probably seem nothing like that. or maybe i am very much like that. kind of difficult to tell b/c like#you Do get the disinterest lol & feedback is Not that familiar / in depth even if positive like well. the emergent So Hated / Scapegoating#noting like if a character just seems refreshingly familiar; Understood; comfortable; fun; what's the odds they're cishet allistic lol....#anyway the epiphany like oh it was figurative blink & you miss it stuttering....did [waiiit] Pace that one off like inhaaale Waugh#in fact i'm sure the Verbalizing Effort has staved off the kind of [thinks about all of it a moment] to go Aauughhh about again#which; again; also something happening 5 yrs in re: the clairvoyant soothsayer autistic neuroqueer quant on the show w/No Thoughts abt it#ppl being invalidated by others having to validate themselves (& others in the same boat); billions going & How We Hate Them For It lol#oh & encanto's [excluded party's effort to partake] tragedy vs billions' [where's winston in this office? this event?] good riddance idc
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the fic of aku and chuuya where the reader has bulimia was so good omg :,)
as someone who also suffers from bulimia i found it so so comforting
if possible could i please request another one with dazai, nikolai and poe <333
please remember to take care of yourself!! <3
More BSD Men with a bulimic! Reader
Warnings: Bulimia, vomit type purging, Nikolai is ignorant, Nikolai spoon feeds you, Nikolai in general, I really fucking hate Dazai so I'm a little mean in his part, reader is not underweight b/c this is based on my experiences
Characters: Dazai, Nikolai, Poe
A/N: this is my first time ever writing for poe and I do not think I nailed his character but yk it's chill.. also I don't really like this I think the only one I really did good was Chuuya in pt 1
Part one here
Nikolai
- I'm so sorry 4 this but he probably thinks ur pathetic..
- Thinks bulimia is gross IM SORRY
- He won't try and stop u till his DUMBASS is informed by Fyodor that Bulimia, especially vomit + laxative purge types are very very very dangerous!!
- A sick part of him wants to encourage you to continue so if you die he'd feel free but ofc he pushes that away and won't encourage you
Oneshot
Catching you purge
You two had just finished eating dinner on your couch when you promptly excused yourself to the bathroom. He looks up at your standing form with suspicious eyes, but doesn't say anything and lets you wander off towards the bathroom.. just until he hears choking and coughing coming from your shared restroom.
You let out a gasp of surprise as you hear the bathroom door open with a loud bang. Fuck, did you really forget to lock it? You pull the end of your toothbrush out the back of your throat and turn around to face your loving boyfriend with tears in your eyes, who had a look of pity on his face.
He groans in exasperation, "Dove.. didn't I tell you to stop doing that?" He asks, his time filled with faux sympathy as he picks the toothbrush out of your hand, placing it back in the holder. All you can do is sigh.. he just didn't get it. "Kolya, I wish it was that easy, but it's not. It's really, really not."
"Oh please, excuses excuses." He mutters, pulling you to your feet before closing the toilet lid and flushing your dinner down the drain. "C'mon, let's get you some more food." Pulling you out of the bathroom by the arm, he drags you to the kitchen and sits you down on the floor.
"Kolya.. no.. I don't need anything else. I don't want anything else." You grumble while he digs in the fridge and pantries. "Well, you just threw up all the nutrients I gave you.. so we gotta get at least a little bit more in you." He smiles, sitting down in front of you with his legs crossed. He placed a bowl of applesauce in front of you, lifting up the spoon to your mouth. "Say aahh.." he giggles, and you begrudgingly open your mouth.
Once the bowl is finished, he places it in your sink and looks down at you with a serious edge in his eyes. "Now.. bathroom is off limits for.. let's say an hour. Cmon, I'll tuck you in."
Poe
- such a sweetheart omg :(
- holds you in his lap with his arms everytime you try and scurry off to your bathroom after a meal
- unlike nikolai he WILL stop you before you even get the chance to throw up
Oneshot
Stopping you from b/p
He had just finished cooking dinner and had placed your portion in front of you, before sitting across from you and staring down at his own meal. Poe had never eaten much himself.. but tried to start eating more to be a good example when you told him about your 'mia.
You wanted to cry. You knew you were either going to shove this all down your throat in five minutes or you weren't going to eat any of it, and you knew he knew. "My love.." He starts, his voice soft. "Can you try? Just a small bite?" He mumbles, reaching across the table and piercing a piece of broccoli on your fork, holding it up to you.
You took a deep breath, and took the fork from him, placing the food in your mouth. You tried, so, so hard. You placed the dirk down while you were chewing, making sure to go slow and take your time tasting the food.
Slowly, with his help, you finished your meal in what you two would call a normal length, around fifteen minutes, but everything inside of you told you to runaway towards the bathroom, stick the back of a toothbrush down your throat and rid yourself of all these calories. "I'll be right back, Ed." Clearing your throat, you stand up and walk towards the restroom.
You heard him sigh and his hand caught your arm, causing you to turn around and face him. You let out a huff as he pulls you down onto his lap, his arms wrapping around your waist and keeping you there "I know what you're going to do." His voice was soft, and gentle, you hated & loved it at the same time. It comforted you but it also made you feel so.. small, like you can't take care of yourself.
All you could find yourself able to do was lean into his touch, muttering a thank you while you rest your head on his chest.
Dazai
I fucking hate him so much I want him dead I hope the next attempt works Dazai
- Another IGNORANT man although this time he'll probably try and act like he cares
- bro probably threatens to tie you to the bed to stop you from binging
- "You can't ruin your perfect physique by binging, 'donna." Little does he know that does NOT help
- He'll say similar things about purging though too so it's fine
- "Shouldn't purge either. You're gonna screw up that pretty little throat and then I can't use it for .. other things."
Oneshot
Catching you binge
You were on the kitchen floor, stuffing your face with the pan of brownies you had made last night. You had already downed a bottle of milk, a loaf of plain bread, dry oats shoved into your mouth by the handful, anything you could think of. You wanted, no, needed, as much as you could get.
You jump as you hear a key turn in the front door, followed by the door opening and closing before Dazai stood above you, a look of disappointment on his face, and was that.. disgust? You knew people thought bulimia was disgusting, but him? Really? Your loving boyfriend?
"Okay, bella. Let's get this cleaned up." He sighs, pulling you to your feet. You were frozen, you just stood there as tears welled in your eyes from the humiliation and guilt. You needed the throw up. You pushed past him and sprinted towards the bathroom, only to be caught by the waist halfway there.
"No, no, no." He tuts, pulling your back against his chest. "There's no need for that. Remember what I said about needing that throat to be ready? Yeah, it's not gonna be if you're vomiting." He looks at you with a sickly sweet smile and all you wanted to do was collapse on the floor and sob but his arms kept you there.
Eventually, he pulled you down onto the floor with him so you sat on his lap as he whispered sweet nothing's in your ear, while you cried wishing you could just vanish.
#bsd x reader#bsd#bungo stray dogs x reader#bungo stray dogs#nikolai x reader#nikolai gogol x reader#gogol x reader#gogol nikolai x reader#poe x reader#edgar allan poe x reader#poe x reader bsd#Dazai x reader#Osamu Dazai x reader#dazai osamu x reader#osamu x reader
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