#I hadn't written anything in a week before I sat down to today to write for a short hour
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wordsofwilderness · 6 months ago
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Here's a little snippet from the fic I'm working on rn:
James was too much and not enough all at the same time. Overwhelming in even the smallest doses, yet never enough to sate Regulus’ need for his company. But it was the best kind of overwhelming, the all consuming kind that shrank the entire world in until it was only the two of them—the kind Regulus could easily become all too addicted to.
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bedoballoons · 1 year ago
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Hii! My b-day was on 8 of oct but I had to celebrate it today (2 weeks later). I threw a party, and invited 9 people, yet nobody showed up. Not even my closest friends. So, I would like to request if possible a hc with yandere Venti, Xiao and Ganyu and reader threw a party yet nobody showed up. If u cant do the request dw, I perfectly understand. Have a nice day and ty for reading my request!
Awwe I'm so sorry to hear that, I can only imagine how heartbreaking that was. Usually I don't write requests right after I get them (I go from oldest to newest.), but I wanted to get this out for you while it was still your birthday.
I hope it makes the day a little better! Happy belated birthday as well!! 🎁🎂🎈🎉🎊❤️
─⊰⁠⊹ฺ🎉𝔾𝕖𝕟𝕤𝕙𝕚𝕟 ℍ𝕖𝕒𝕕𝕔𝕒𝕟𝕠𝕟𝕤⊰⁠⊹ฺ🎉
{༻~Happy birthday~༺}
CW: Yandere themes, slightly angsty with fluff at the end!
P.s. I haven't written Ganyu before so I hope she's not to ooc!
(Includes: Venti, Xiao, and Ganyu!)
♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡
𑁍༄Venti:
You sighed quietly, watching as droopy streamers started fall from their places and brightly coloured balloons deflated by the second, even the cake looked depressed. It was your birthday and no one even bothered to show up..."What a great day to have been born..."
"Oh ho ho, someone has such a frown! Perhaps I can aid you in turning it upside down!" You perked up slightly upon hearing Ventis familiar happy go lucky voice, maybe no one else had shown up...but he had and you couldn't be more thankful, "Venti! You made it...thank you!" He chuckled sweetly, pleased beyond belief that he could make the most beautiful person in the world smile, "Of course I made it! It's your birthday and I want it to be a very happy one! Speaking of which, it's not much because...ehe I'm not the best with mora but..."
Your cheeks blushed a pink tint as the bard held out a small gift for you,...the first one you'd open. "You really didn't have to you know..."
"Of course I did! What kind of person doesn't bring a gift to someone's birthday, especially when that someone is as amazing as you!"
You bit your bottom lip, feeling slightly flustered as you opened the box...lifting up the lid to reveal a quill pen and ink, along with what seemed to be a small handmade notebook. The feather of the pen was what caught you eye as it was a bright sky blue decorated with small jewels of your favourite colours, "It's goregous Venti..."
"I figured together we could write fun memories in it and then one day after its full, I can use it to write songs for us both about our favourite moments."
𑁍༄Xiao:
"Are you...alright?"
That question seemed to sting more than it normally did, not only because the answer was a painful one...but because it was being asked on a day that should have made you happy...one that should have been all about you, if only people had actually showed up. "I'm...as alright as I can be. At least your here, I think if you hadn't appeared, I truly would have had to of celebrated all alone."
"Normally...I don't show up for birthdays, I find them crowded and feel that you should celebrate ones birth everyday, but your birthday is a special one. Someone as wonderful as you... deserves to be celebrated. I...even got you you a gift...though it may not be anything you enjoy."
You smiled slightly, watching as Xiao sat down beside you...setting a messily wrapped gift in your lap, "Xiao...I am going to love whatever you may give me, because it's from you."
His heart raced in his chest and as you began to open his gift he silently prayed to the geo archon you'd like what he got you, he'd spent hours choosing it.
You gasped, shocked to bouquet of Qinxing wrapped in adepti sigils, each of them were beautiful and smelled of the mountain tops..you couldn't even begin to imagine how long it took him to gather them all, "Xiao I-"
"The sigils will make it so they never wilt, they will always remain how they look right now...a symbol..of how I feel for you. A love that will never cease."
𑁍༄Ganyu:
Ganyu pulled you close, resting her head on top of yours while she hummed a lullaby and rubbed your back, hoping she could at least ease the pain you were feeling. Not even in her wildest dreams could she imagine how anyone wouldn't want to attend your birthday, she thought of you as the most amazing person to ever exist...a star roaming amongst a sea of darkness and a day to celebrate you to her...was something incredibly special.
"I'm so sorry no one else made it...perhaps they all got caught up with work or other things and just couldn't get out of it?"
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"Ganyu...I highly doubt everyone just somehow got busy on my birthday...thank you for trying though. I'm sad I didn't get to have alot of people, but having you here, it's enough to make my birthday perfect." Your words left her speechless, she loved you more than she could truly handle and hearing that she could still make your day perfect after all that had happened...
"I have a gift for you, I thought long and hard about it, made sure it was absolutely perfect for you." She moved away from you just long enough to retrieve the gift, it was wrapped in a pale blue paper and scented like flowers, you hadn't even opened it yet and you could see how much effort she'd put into it, "Awwe Ganyu this is to much, you didn't have to.."
"Oh but I did...please open it, I think you'll love it."
You smiled at her, carefully peeling back the wrapping paper and opening the box just enough to see what was inside. "Oh my gosh...it's a plushy and it's handmade, Ganyu did you-"
"In between shifts I learned the pattern for you and made sure it was sewn the absolute best I could. I've never made anything like it before and I was worried I wouldn't finish it in time...but I wanted you to have something that showed my determination and attention to what you like. I also figured it could help you sleep."
ଘ(੭*ˊᵕˋ)੭* ੈ♡‧₊˚*⁠.⁠✧Happy birthday~
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lesbicosmos-writes · 21 days ago
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@deadboyween day 4!!
day 4 prompt: orbs
summary: edwin is worried about charles, who just will not sit still. he knows something is troubling him, but he just won't talk about it. eventually, he exhausts himself so much he reverts into orb form.
notes: when i made the prompt list this was the one i was determined to write something for, so when i realised it was TODAY and i hadn't written anything yet, i just kinda threw this together oops
also on ao3!!
and it feels good to be known so well
Charles Rowland rarely sat still. He always had to be somewhat dynamic, whether it be bouncing his leg up and down or fidgeting with whatever was in his hands at the time. He was fine if he was focused, like during client interviews and while on cases, but when he was just relaxing, he was never truly still.
That had been the case for as long as Edwin could remember, but Charles’s constant movement had never been quite as bad as it had been for the last few weeks. Even seeing him sitting down at all had been a rarity.
He’d been on his feet for so long that he just looked so…tired. Ghosts may not sleep, but that didn’t mean they could keep moving forever without so much as a break. Edwin had been beginning to worry. Something was bothering him, that much was clear. And the way he kept looking directly at Edwin, as though to say something, then immediately looked away as soon as the other boy made eye contact, really didn’t help Edwin’s growing anxiety.
“Charles, are you quite alright?” he asked, putting his notebook away in the drawer of his desk and giving the boy his full attention. “I know you’re usually very mobile but there is clearly something on your mind.”
“I’m good, mate. Don’t worry about me,” Charles replied simply.
Edwin knew Charles well enough to tell when what he said was just a pre-programmed response to get people to stop worrying about him, no matter what was going on in that brilliant-yet-troubled mind of his. Edwin also, however, knew Charles well enough to tell when pushing him to talk wasn’t a good idea. And it was clear that this wasn’t the time, so Edwin chose support over questioning.
“Okay, but if you do need to talk, you know I’m always here to listen. And please sit down, you look exhausted.”
“I said I’m fine, Edwin,” Charles said again, snappier. He immediately regretted his tone. “Just…”
Then, Charles seemed to wobble a little on his feet. He let out a shaky breath, even though his lungs hadn’t truly inhaled air in thirty-five years, and leaned back against the arm of the sofa as though to steady himself.
“Charles…?”
“Shit, Edwin, I think…”
Before Charles could even finish his sentence, a spot on his chest just over his unbeating heart began to glow, and within a few seconds the rest of his corporeal form had faded away, leaving only a glowing sphere in his place.
“Charles!”
Edwin rushed over to the sofa, just catching the orb before it rolled off the sofa and onto the ground. He lifted the pulsing light to face height, inspecting it as though it could actually be harmed.
“This is the second time in two weeks, Charles. Please, just talk to me, you’re exhausting yourself,” he sighed, trying to fight back tears he couldn’t quite explain.
He thought things had gotten better since Port Townsend. He thought they had agreed to talk when they had important things on their mind, no matter what. He thought they weren’t keeping the deep stuff quiet anymore.
Evidently, he was wrong. Edwin couldn’t help but think that perhaps it was his confession that had caused them to backtrack so significantly in terms of communication. Sure, Charles told him that he was fine with it, that it hadn’t changed anything between them, that they were still the most important people in the world to each other – and Edwin believed him. At first glance, it would seem that they were just as close as they had been before – closer, even. Charles seemed more inclined to initiate physical contact than ever, and always seemed to be calmest when Edwin was in the room with him. But Edwin also knew Charles had gotten very good at keeping things locked up inside himself, especially things that could potentially make him feel like a burden. If everyone would be happier without it being said, it wouldn’t be said. Edwin genuinely thought that if you were to look up people pleaser in a dictionary, all that would be written there as its definition would be Charles Rowland’s name.
So if his confession had changed things, if Charles really was worrying about it, of course he wouldn’t mention it. If it had changed things, of course he might think twice about being quite so open about his own struggles. Edwin just wished he understood just how much he loved him. Not necessarily the love that made Edwin want to kiss Charles, to touch him in a romantic sense – but the love that made him always want Charles around, the love that made Charles the most important person in Edwin’s universe, the love that he had for him no matter what, no matter whether or not he returned Edwin’s romantic feelings.
Edwin just loved Charles because of who he was, and he always had. He hoped one day the other boy might finally understand that, so he knew intrinsically that he really could talk to him about anything, and didn’t have to bottle it up so much that things like this happened so often.
Edwin returned to his desk, but didn’t pull his notebook back out just yet. He simply sat there, Charles’s most pure and natural form floating slightly in his palms.
A few hours later, Charles had still not returned back to his usual gangly, grinning form. He was still just that tiny sphere of glowing energy. He’d been rolling around on the desk for the better part of half an hour – Edwin scolded him for moving around in this state when his constant activity was what prompted it in the first place – and had now found a place to settle.
He was nestled on Edwin’s shoulder, as though peering over him to look at his notebook like he usually did in his corporeal body. Every so often he nuzzled closer to Edwin’s neck, and Edwin couldn’t help the sense of pride and comfort he felt in the knowledge that Charles felt safe with him, no matter what secrets might be causing problems in his currently non-existent head.
The quiet of the room was interrupted when the door to the office opened and Crystal walked in.
“Hey, Edwin, have you seen Charles-” she began, but cut herself off when she spotted the flickering sphere on Edwin’s shoulder. “What’s that?”
“Oh. Hello, Crystal. Uh, this is Charles,” Edwin said.
“I’m sorry, what? He’s…a blob?” Crystal looked confused as she took her coat off, laying it across the empty sofa.
“An orb,” Edwin corrected. “It happens to us sometimes when we get tired. We may not be able to sleep like the living do, but we can compress ourselves into our most natural form – pure spectral energy. Well, I say we can. Sometimes it is involuntary, like fainting. That’s what happened to Charles.”
“Okay, that’s…kind of cool actually. Like ghost hibernation.”
As Crystal walked over towards the desk, Charles seemed to vibrate, growing brighter for a couple of seconds before dimming again.
“That’s him saying hello,” Edwin clarified.
“Oh. Hey, Charles! Wait…he can hear us?”
“Yes. Well, no. Sort of. He can sense that you’re here but perhaps not understand what you’re saying. Well, if we do hear we forget it when we turn back. We don’t fully understand it, if we’re honest.”
“Right,” Crystal said, clearly understanding even less than Edwin did.
The orb moved again, this time towards the side of Edwin’s neck as he had been doing all afternoon. Edwin chuckled – it did always tickle a little when he did that.
“Charles tends to get clingy when he’s like this,” Edwin turned back to Crystal, who had sat opposite him in the chair usually reserved for clients.
Edwin from a few months ago might have told her to move, or at least given her a glaring look, but now-Edwin simply smiled at her. They’d become good friends since everything, once they’d both realised they were being a little unfair taking out their frustrations on one another.
“He told me once that it is like his way of ensuring me he is there even when he cannot exactly talk. He seems to have a proclivity for always having to be near me in some way, especially since Hell,” he continued.
“I had noticed that,” Crystal said.
“I keep trying to tell him he doesn’t have to, that I can protect myself, but he just won’t listen.”
“It does seem like protecting you makes him happy,” she commented.
“I know. And I like knowing that he is happy, of course I do. But he seems to think that if he isn’t useful to me, then I will not want him around.”
“He’s like the biggest people pleaser I’ve ever met.”
“I just wish he knew that I want him around no matter what.”
Edwin turned to look sadly at his shoulder as he spoke. Charles only nuzzled even closer.
Crystal leaned further towards him, comforting.
“I’m sure he does know that, Edwin, it’s just… it’s just who he is. I think with everything that happened when he was alive, he constantly feels like he has to prove himself to everyone because he could never seem to be good enough for anyone. His dad beat him, and even the people he thought were his friends turned on him and fucking killed him. He’s gonna have a lot of trauma from that. Even if he refuses to really talk about it.”
“I’ve been thinking the same thing.”
“Also, if he can hear us right now, I’m sure he’ll know he can talk to us if he needs to,” Crystal said, her voice growing louder at the end as though specifically intending for Charles to hear.
Edwin appreciated how much she cared. Despite his initial jealousy and coldness towards her, it was nice having someone else who cared for Charles so deeply.
“I hope so. Especially since…” he took a deep breath. He hadn’t expected to be confiding in Crystal about this, but he was glad she came over. “Lately, he’s seemed even more distracted. Something is weighing on him – this is the second time he’s transformed in the past fortnight. I wish he would talk to me instead of keeping it inside.”
Crystal nodded slightly, her face unexpectedly relaxing a little.
“Okay, I think I know what specifically it’s been about more recently,” she said.
“Really? Did he talk to you about it?”
He tried not to be a little sad at the idea that Charles went to Crystal about it before he went to him. It was irrational, of course – he knew the two of them were close, and of course he loved Crystal – but it wasn’t helping that little voice in the back of his head that kept thinking something had changed between them since Hell, that he didn’t feel as comfortable sharing things with him anymore.
“Not exactly,” Crystal said, and Edwin’s mind eased. “I kind of figured it out and brought it up.”
“What is it? Is something wrong?”
“No, no, nothing like that, don’t worry,” Crystal reassured him, clearly noticing this was causing Edwin distress. “Look, I’m not the one who should tell you about it, so just believe me that it’s nothing bad, please.”
Edwin sighed.
“Okay. If you’re sure.”
“I promise. He’ll tell you when he’s ready.”
What could he possibly need to prepare to tell him? Edwin desperately suppressed the many anxiety-riddled questions and possibilities his tireless mind thought up.
“I’ll be here for him no matter what,” he said.
“I know,” Crystal smiled. “You always are.”
Edwin smiled back at her – the sister he never had. Crystal suddenly reached her hand up to her face and wiped a tear from her eye before it even had chance to fall.
“Alright, enough of that,” she sniffled. “I just came to say I’m not gonna be here for the next couple days. I’m meeting up with a few old friends, I wanna try and fix things. If I can.”
“Of course. I know you can, Crystal. I’m aware I don’t say things like this often, but you really are such a lovely person. I don’t know exactly what you did to these friends before everything happened, but I hope they see how much you’ve changed.”
“Thanks, Edwin. That…it means a lot.”
Both of them looked at one another for a few seconds, the small smiles still on both of their faces.
Then, all of a sudden, the orb on Edwin’s shoulder grew brighter, and brighter, and brighter.
“Woah, what’s-”
Before Crystal could ask, the light faded, and Charles’s familiar form faded back into corporeality. Since he had been perched on Edwin, he was sat on the arm of the chair practically clung to him when he opened his eyes.
“Charles! Good to have you back,” Edwin sighed, relieved.
“I need to talk to you,” Charles said, looking directly into his eyes.
“And that’s my cue to leave,” Crystal said, standing up from the chair and grabbing her coat from the sofa. “I’ll see you guys on Wednesday, yeah?”
“Goodbye, Crystal. Good luck.”
With that, Crystal left the office. Edwin swore he saw her give Charles a smile and a thumbs up as she left the room.
Edwin turned, surprised to see Charles hadn’t even moved, and was still all but pressed up against his side.
“How are you feeling?” Edwin asked, trying not to focus too hard on the proximity.
“Better. Thanks.”
“Are you sure? I’m not trying to pry, but I’m getting worried about you Charles. We said we’d talk-”
As Edwin spoke, Charles moved – but only to face him, leaning back against the desk like he did when they had clients.
“I know, mate. I’m sorry, I just…right, I’ve been trying to figure out how to talk to you about something but I didn’t know how or when or if, and I guess…that rest I just got kind of gave me time to think a bit more without there being everything else,” Charles explained.
Edwin was confused, but gave him the chance to talk.
“Right. Is there something wrong, or…?”
“No! God, no, Edwin. Shit, I’ve really stressed you out, haven’t I?”
“Yes, I rather think you have,” Edwin chuckled. “I guess I’ve just been worried that perhaps…you feel differently about our agreement to talk to each other about things since I told you what I did in Hell.”
“What? Edwin, no. Fuck, I’m so sorry, I didn’t realise-”
“You have nothing to apologise for,” Edwin told him, reaching out to take his hands.
Maybe that was overstepping, but Charles didn’t complain or pull away – quite the opposite: he held Edwin back.
“No, I do. You’ve been here thinking I…god, I’m sorry. I swear, what you told me in Hell is…well actually I guess it kind of is why I’ve been acting all weird, but it’s not what you’re thinking, I promise.”
“Then what?”
“I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it, right? Ever since you told me what you did. I wanted to properly think on it because I love you so much and, like, I know we’d be us no matter what, but I just couldn’t just let this go, could I?”
Edwin opened his mouth to say something, but Charles cut him off.
“I know what you’re gonna say. You’re thinking I’m doing what I always do and just telling you what you wanna hear, but I’m not. I needed to think about this for me as well as for you.”
“And…?” Edwin prompted, trying not to sound as hopeful as he was steadily growing to be.
“Well, I was just driving myself insane, wasn’t I? I had no idea how to put this shit into words or figure out what it means. But then Crystal brought it up, and you know what she’s like – she’s direct about shit. And it really helped. She kinda put everything about this into perspective. ‘Cause, like, I was trying to find someone to compare my feelings to, to figure out if I felt the same, but, like, I’ve never been in love. I don’t know what that feels like. Sure I had a couple of girlfriends when I was alive but that was just typical teen romance, doing it just because it was expected of you and because it felt good. It was never proper love. All I knew was that you weren’t like anyone I’ve ever known. And Crystal helped me realise that maybe…”
Charles held Edwin’s hand tighter.
Edwin tried not to breathe too heavily, looking up at Charles with such hope and love and relief in his eyes.
“Maybe I’ve been in love with you since the start. I knew you were different, but we just clicked so well I didn’t even realise what that difference was, that it was deeper. You’re my best friend above everything else, but there’s definitely something else too. I just needed a little help to see it.”
“Charles, what are you saying?” Edwin asked.
He knew what he was saying. Of course he did. But he couldn’t quite believe it, so he asked anyway.
Charles reached his other hand out and tipped Edwin’s head up slightly by his chin, ensuring they were making eye contact.
“I’m in love with you. Always have been.”
Edwin couldn’t help the soft surprised noise that escaped his throat.
“Charles…why were you getting so stressed about this? You know you could have told me before it got to this point.”
“I know, it’s just…I think it took a while for me to realise I could have this. Like, obviously I knew you felt the same, but…I didn’t feel worthy? Almost. I don’t know. I never- I never really knew what proper romantic love was. My parents, maybe they were in love once, before I came along, but I don’t remember it. The only long-term romantic relationship I really knew was one full of fear and like, tension. And abuse. I guess I just worried I might not know how to do this, so maybe you wouldn’t want to. I dunno, it’s stupid.”
“No. It’s not stupid, Charles.”
Edwin held Charles’s hands under his own chin.
“Well, the idea that you aren’t worthy of my love is preposterous, but I understand why you might have felt like that. I know your family weren’t the image of love you wanted to see growing up. I can’t exactly say my own were either. But I promise you; your love, in all its forms, is beautiful. You might not think you know how to do this, but you’re doing it brilliantly. Even if you didn’t feel the same romantic inclinations I do, you are enough. You’re so, so much more than enough.”
“Really?”
“Really.”
Charles couldn’t hold back any longer – he surged forwards, wrapping his arms around Edwin. It was awkward, with Edwin still sitting in the chair, so Edwin stood up. The two of them pressed up against each other, holding the other close as though they could disappear at any second.
Edwin only held him closer when he heard a quiet sniffle come from Charles.
“I love you,” he mumbled into Edwin’s shoulder, and Edwin swore a rush of warmth flooded his cold dead heart.
“I love you too,” Edwin replied. “More than anything.”
When they broke apart, they simply looked at each other for a moment, soft smiles on their faces.
“Can I kiss you?” Charles asked, and Edwin didn’t think he’d ever heard him sound so quiet, his mind so still.
“Of course you can.”
Edwin had been dreaming about this moment for a while, no matter how hard he tried not to. Every so often, his thoughts would wander to what Charles’s lips would feel like against his own, whether their kisses would be hungry and passionate or soft and gentle – or a little of both.
He always imagined, in the rare instances that he allowed himself to ponder the potentiality of Charles one day feeling the same way, that their first kiss would be quick, in the heat of the moment. Charles had always been an impulsive person, so he imagined this would be no different. Perhaps they’d be out on a case and Charles would pull him aside, crush their lips together and whisper a hurried ‘talk later?’ before getting back to the task at hand.
Edwin had never been happier to be wrong. Obviously, he wouldn’t have predicted or asked for the circumstances that led up to this, for Charles’s emotional conflict and physical and emotional exhaustion, but this moment, their lips meeting softly in the early evening light that poured in through the office window, was perfect.
When their mouths separated, Edwin kept his eyes closed for a few seconds, just revelling in the moment. Then, he opened them and oh he was glad he did – Charles looked incandescently beautiful standing before him, his lips slightly parted, his eyes huge and focused on him.
They both moved together for a second kiss, resting their foreheads against each other when their lips broke apart, as though being even centimetres apart from one another was a curse.
“I’m sorry, about the stress, and about the…orb-ing thing,” Charles said quietly, and Edwin swore he could feel breath against his own lips. That wasn’t possible, though. Ghosts didn’t breathe.
“Charles, it’s alright. I’m just glad you’re not suffering without telling me. Besides, we finally had an opportunity to explain our exhaustion symptoms to Crystal. You gave her a very confused fright when she first walked in and saw you.”
“Oh, I bet.”
Both of them laughed, heads falling onto each other’s shoulder.
When they separated, Edwin took a step back. But Charles kept his hand where it was on Edwin’s waist.
“Can we…go to the sofa? I don’t…wanna let go just yet.”
Edwin just smiled, smitten.
“Of course, Charles.”
The two of them settled together on the sofa – it was a little bigger than their old one, but still too small to fit two nearly six feet tall teenage ghosts if they wanted any semblance of space between them. Luckily, these two ghosts specifically weren’t bothered about space.
Charles positioned himself practically on top of Edwin, curled up on his chest, quiet and still. Edwin’s arms wrapped around Charles’s waist, keeping him close. He’d never really known quite how much he wanted this – how much he craved this – just being this close to the boy he loved most, touching in any way they could. Charles shuffled impossibly closer, nuzzling his face into Edwin’s neck in the same way he had earlier while in his orb form. The only difference was this time, Charles left gentle kisses there too. This time, he could definitely feel the warmth of Charles pressed against him. This time, there was no stress, no anxiety, no panicking. This time, the two of them were all that mattered.
They held each other tightly. Two spirits, at their core just bundles of pure energy, transforming that energy into love for the other.
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littlerat2 · 5 months ago
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Pillows
@prinxietyweek
Prinxiety Week Day 5
Prompt: Pillows
Warnings: None
Words: 1174
AO3
Author’s Note: So sorry this is late, y'all. I had a busy day, and I still hadn't edited it, but here it is! Only like, twenty minutes after midnight LMAO
Roman smiled down at his boyfriend. The two were laying on Roman's bed, Virgil draped over Roman's legs and head resting on Roman's stomach like a pillow. He was sound asleep, arms wrapped under Roman's torso in a way that ensured they would be numb when he woke up. Roman's laptop rested on Virgil's shoulder blades as he typed away.
They'd do this a few times a week. Virgil would catch up on sleep while Roman worked on a story or poem. It was the most peaceful part of Roman's day. He could just relax into his writing with his melted boyfriend on his stomach.
He was just starting to get into the groove of writing when heard a knock at the door. 
"Just a second," he called softly, not wanting to wake Virgil. He pulled his comforter over the smaller man's head, waiting to see if he stirred. When he didn't, Roman called back. "Okay, you can come in."
The others didn’t know they were dating. Virgil wasn’t ready to tell anyone yet, and Roman prioritized Virgil’s comfort over wanting to show off his sweet boyfriend.
He’d talked to the others when Virgil was asleep like this. He was usually out cold by the time anyone wanted to talk to him, so nobody questioned much movement under the covers.
The door swung open slowly, and Roman smiled and waved as Patton took a step or two inside the doorway.
“Hello, Padre! What can I do for you?” He asked with a soft smile.
“Hey, Ro. I just wanted to see if you’ve seen Virgil? I haven’t seen him much today and I just want to be sure he’s okay.”
“I think he said something about taking a nap,” Roman said, trying not to smile at the sleepy bundle of eyeshadow and hair dye dozing on his stomach. He wasn’t technically lying. Virgil did say something about taking a nap. He just left out the part where he looked pointedly at Roman when he said it. He left out the part where Roman left soon after to find Virgil curled up in his bed. And he left out the part where Virgil was still dead to the world on his stomach under his huge, red, faux feather comforter.
“Oh, that’s good,” Patton chirped, the worried pinch in his browline evening out. “He seemed really tired this morning.”
“Yeah. I’m glad he’s getting some rest.”
Roman expected that to be the end of their conversation, but Patton came and sat on the side of his bed. He didn’t quite mind. He liked talking to Patton. He just hoped the shift in the mattress didn’t wake Virgil.
“What’cha writing?” Patton asked with a smile. Roman lit up, opening his mouth to share, but closed it before any words escaped.
He looked at the purple text on the screen staring back at him. The mushy words he’d written about Virgil in his poetry document when his brain wouldn’t focus on anything else.
“Ro?” Patton’s voice startled him out of his thoughts.
“Right! Sorry. This one… this one isn’t ready to share just yet. But I’ve got something else I’ve been looking for feedback on, if you wouldn’t mind?” 
“Of course!” Patton beamed excitedly. He always seemed to like reading Roman’s work, whether it be a poem, a story, or something else.
 Roman scrolled up to a different part of the document. This one was still about Virgil, but much less specific. Patton probably wouldn’t be able to tell who it was about, and he had been looking for some feedback on it. He’d written it for Virgil months ago, but still hadn’t shown it to him yet. He was nervous. He wanted it to be perfect.
He changed the text color to black, and handed the laptop over to Patton. His eyes scanned over the stanzas, a smile growing as he read. Once he finished, he handed it back.
“I love it!” complimented Patton. Roman was expecting the sweet statement to be followed by some sort of feedback, but he was met instead with eyes narrowing mischievously. “So… Who’s it for?”
Roman tensed. He should have seen it coming.
“Well-” He was cut short by rustling under the covers, and Roman froze. Crap. Virgil poked his head out, his hair an adorable mess. He blinked his eyes open sleepily and looked up at Roman, resting his chin on Roman’s sternum. 
“Did you say somethin’, Ro?” He mumbled. He hadn’t noticed Patton yet.
“Uh…” Roman trailed off, eyes darting between Virgil and Patton. Virgil’s sleep riddled brain seemed to have caught up, and he turned his head to look at Patton.
“Oh.” Virgil stared at Patton for a few seconds before laying his head back on Roman’s stomach. He retrieved one of his hands from under Roman’s torso and gave a small wave, before shaking off the static-y numbness. Patton waved back, smiling.
“Hey, kiddo,” Patton said with a little giggle. He threw the smallest of smug smiles Roman’s way, but his eyes were alight with questions.
Roman looked down at Virgil, who just shrugged. 
“You can tell him, if he doesn’t tell anyone else,” he murmured, already edging closer to sleep again. Maybe it was his drowsy state, but Roman honestly expected panic, or at least apprehension.
“You sure?” Roman whispered, carding a hand through Virgil’s fluffy hair.
“Mhm. Tell me how it goes later.” And with that, Virgil was asleep again, letting out soft snores.
Roman looked at Patton once more. He was leaning on the palm of his hand, now smiling widely. 
“Virgil and I are dating,” Roman whispered with a giddy smile. Patton gave a tiny squeal, before slapping a hand over his mouth.
“How long?”
“Like… Three months.”
“Three months?!” Patton exclaimed. Roman shushed him frantically.
“You can’t tell anyone. Virgil isn’t ready and I want to respect that.”
“I won’t, I won’t,” Patton reassured.
Virgil stirred on Roman’s lap, mumbling something unintelligible before settling again. Roman couldn’t help the wide smile that broke out over his face. He ran a gentle hand through Virgil’s hair, and he made a content little noise. Roman smiled and pressed a gentle kiss to his temple.
“Aww,” Patton cooed. “You two are adorable.”
“Thanks,” Roman said, not taking his eyes off of Virgil. He yawned and closed his laptop. “I think I might take a nap as well. Virgil and I were up late watching YouTube on my laptop.”
“Alrighty. You two get some sleep. I’ll make sure nobody comes looking for you guys for a little bit.” Patton winked, and walked towards the door.
“Thanks, padre,” Roman chuckled. He gently maneuvered himself into a comfortable position with his arms around Virgil, and pulled the covers over them as Patton clicked off the light. When he heard the door latch, he leaned down and pressed a kiss to Virgil’s hair.
“Love you, Virge.”
Virgil didn’t answer, but he nestled closer to Roman in his sleep. Roman smiled. He was glad he got to be Virgil’s pillow.
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my-own-walker · 1 year ago
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Someone You've Never Seen Before
A Kyle Spencer Fan Fiction
frat!kyle AU, fem!main character, sexual themes, mature language, use of drugs and alcohol, frat boy antics
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4.
The rest of the weekend went fine. I spent the majority of it dreading class on Monday. For one, I did not want to see how badly I failed Friday's quiz. Also, I especially didn't want to see Kyle. Or Kyle to see me, for that matter. It was weird that he had gone from "just some guy" to someone I couldn't stand in a matter of a day. 
When I sat in the nearly empty lecture hall, I said a silent prayer that Kyle would find himself running early today. He could find a seat next to Archie and I would have a break from him. Instead, though, I sat through an excruciating fifteen minutes of watching people trickle in, filling up the classroom in the usual arrangement. I couldn't even look at the door any longer, for fear of Kyle thinking I might be looking for him. I began doodling in my notebook, idly drawing little faces and flowers while awaiting my impending social doom.
Within seconds, it seemed, a figure slid down into the chair next to mine, landing with a thunk. I didn't dare move a muscle. As if the universe were trying to reward me, our professor began the lecture quickly. I avoided any confrontation with Kyle, at least for the time being.
I took notes rather diligently. There was no way I could stoop as low as to cheat again. Each figure, equation, and concept got hastily scribbled into my notebook. I even threw on my glasses part-way through to see the board better. I didn't wear them often, instead opting to simply sit where I could see well enough. But I meant business.
The class started to go by quickly. The professor began to speak faster in order to cram the content in before the hour was up. I could hardly keep up with the break-neck pace. While flipping my pencil over to erase something I had written, it flew out of my hand and clattered to the ground. Before I could even react, a blonde mop of hair dipped into my periphery.
"Here," Kyle whispered, presenting me with the catapulted writing utensil. 
"Thanks," I replied simply, taking the pencil so I could return to trying to not fail calculus. He smiled genuinely at me, his gaze lingering for longer than I could believe. I returned to writing, but suddenly, it was hard to focus on the task at hand. My stupid brain kept replaying his smile. The way his eyes crinkled, their deep brown color striking me. Stop, Hannah, I scolded myself.
Professor Edwards finally finished lecturing and opened up the room to questions, with just minutes until we were due to leave. I looked at my handiwork in my notebook and found that I hadn't written anything down since dropping my pencil. I covered my face with my hands and rubbed my eyes. How could I let a boy, let alone Kyle Spencer, distract me like that?
I felt Kyle turn his attention to me. In my periphery, I could see that he was looking at me periodically. I tried my best to focus on the last seconds of class time, but it was to no avail. I started packing my things up in defeat.
Kyle was up and out of his seat as soon as our professor said we could leave. I was thankful for it. If he didn't want to chance speaking to me, I sure as hell didn't want to chance it either.
+
The apartment was eerily quiet. I couldn't stand it. 
I was up late, trying to finish a piece for my poetry class. Inspiration hadn't struck me yet and I grew frustrated. It wasn't due until Friday, but if I wanted to pass a calc quiz, I'd have to finish the poem as soon as possible to focus on math for the rest of the week. I stood and stretched, padding over to my bed. The old mattress springs protested as I laid my weary body upon them. 
I stared up at the ceiling, hoping some divine intervention would give me an idea. The poetry prompt was essentially to write about love. It was the first piece that would be due in class, so the professor started with an easy assignment. Well, at least, it was supposed to be. Love is perhaps the easiest, most cliche thing to write about. I think that's why I struggled so much with it.
Out of sheer desperation, I pulled out my phone to scroll through Instagram. Maybe getting the instant dopamine rush of social media would help me feel "love" somehow. I mainly followed other kids from school. My feed was full of party photos, quotes from famous authors, and some indie "aesthetic" accounts' posts.
While scrolling, a quote from Virginia Woolf came up. I was relieved, hoping her great, old words would give me inspiration. "Just in case you ever foolishly forget; I'm never not thinking of you."   I scrolled down, kind of unsatisfied with the quote. The next photo was one posted by my friend Leon. It was a group shot of him and his frat brothers at the TKE party on Friday. In the center of the shot, stood an unmistakable blonde boy. Kyle Spencer.
I threw my phone down onto the bed next to me and groaned aloud. Why can I not get rid of this guy? Why do I see him everywhere now? I thought. I sat up and stared off, wide-eyed, at the corner of my room. I knew what I needed.
Hopping off my bed, I was careful to not make too much noise. I grabbed my laptop and shoved it into my leather messenger bag. I slid the first pair of shoes I could find on, plugged my headphones into my phone, and slipped quietly out of my room. 
My plan was to hit up my favorite late-night coffee shop on campus. The night was dark and humid, smacking me in the face as I stepped out into it. After shoving my headphones into my ears, I put the hood up on my sweatshirt and set off to my insomniac paradise. It was aptly called "Sleepwalker Coffee Co." They knew their audience well. College students need caffeine at all hours of the day.
The walk was short. We lived rather close to the shop. I discovered the place my freshman year and fell in love. When Lily and I were searching for an apartment, I practically begged her, on my hands and knees, to move into the place closest to Sleepwalker. In three years, I essentially ate and drank my way through their entire menu. I walked along the campus streets until I reached the familiar brick exterior of the shop. The door was painted a dark evergreen and held a beautiful wreath of dried flowers. When I stepped in, the warm smell of cinnamon and freshly ground coffee beans calmed my senses.
I nestled into a small booth in the corner of the place. It was unsurprisingly packed in there. Tons of students sat getting work done while fraying their nerves with cups of liquid energy. It was dark and plush in the shop. Velvet seating and dark looming bookshelves surrounded me.  Royal purple drapes hung on the windows. I took the first sip of my chai latte and sighed, smiling softly. 
The world was better at hours like this, I found. No one bothers you. The coffee shop, as busy as it was, felt like my own personal haven. I could sit in peaceful bliss, working away steadily on my laptop. At hours like this, the sky is dark, sparkling with the ethereal promise of a new day. 
Sparkling. The word hung in my mind like how low smoke hangs and swirls around your head in a dark dive bar. What sparkles? I thought. How does love sparkle? It doesn't. But someone can. Someone you love.
That was all the inspiration I needed to get my poem done.
Previous Part | Next Part
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carni-val · 2 years ago
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Hello. I know you still aren't taking requests, and I don't expect you to do this now. Could you write something with Raymond Smith calming his f!s/o down from a breakdown/panic attack that was caused by exhaustion and stress? And him finding out that his s/o hasn't ate or drank much if anything due to the stress.
I just found out we have bedbugs and I haven't slept but maybe an hour in the last 48 hours, and also only managed to drink a yogurt smoothie. I could use some self indulgent Raymond headcanons or whatever you feel like. It probably sounds selfish but, I need a break from reality. Your writing gives me that.
I'm Tired [Raymond Smith]
pairing: Raymond Smith x F!Reader
summary: Ray takes care of you when things get to be a little too much.
warnings: Reader having a hard time, a breakdown/panic attack
author's note: Hello my dear. First of all, I'm so sorry that you're going through this. Bed bugs are hell on earth so I will take this request to try and help soften the blow of it all. I also have not written for this man in so long and I kind of miss him. I will try and get back to writing for him as soon as I can <3
Charlie Hunnam Masterlist | Raymond Smith Masterlist
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You hadn't answered Ray's calls for the past hour and it had him worried sick.
He knew you had to have been home from work by now, but he hadn't heard back from you.
He left Mickey's as soon as he could and made his way to your apartment, knocking frantically on the door when he got there.
No answer.
Shit. Shit. Shit.
He pulled out his keys, finding the copy to your apartment key hanging there before unlocking the door and making his way in.
After he'd confided in you about what he did for work, the two of you decided it'd be a good thing for him to have the spare key, incase anything happened.
He hoped he'd never have to use it, but it looked like today was the day.
Once he was in your apartment, he searched through the rooms, calling out your name, growing more panicked each time he was met with silence.
When he finally got to your room, he found you on your bed, face soaked with tears and chest heaving.
"Oh, love." Ray's heart would just sink.
You looked okay physically - you didn't seem hurt, the place didn't seem to have been broken into, but you weren't really okay.
He'd rush over to the bed and take you in his arms, holding you there and letting you cry on his shoulder - no questions asked.
This wasn't the first time he'd seen you like this; he knew how overwhelming life could get and when it rained, it poured. But he was the best damn umbrella.
He didn't say a word, holding you tighter to him when you sobbed into his chest.
His ringed hand would reach up and smooth the hair on the back of your head, stroking your head gently and rhythmically, quietly shushing you and promising you that everything was okay - trying to remind himself of the same thing as he recovered from the fright you gave him - and if things weren't okay right now, then they would be.
He'd press kisses on top of your head and bare your weight, letting you rest.
"I'm so tired," you finally said once your crying calmed down.
Without another word, Ray lay down against your bed, you still cradled tightly in his arms and pressed against his chest.
It took you some time but you explained everything that had happened throughout your week; every single thing that fell through that just piled up and brought you to this point.
"And I can't even remember the last time I slept or ate anything," you sighed heavily.
This shifted a gear in Ray because this would absolutely not do and all of that was going to change right now.
He sat you up and pulled out a pair of your pyjamas from your dresser. It was barely six o'clock but tomorrow was Saturday so you could afford to lay in.
"You're going to rest here," he explained as he helped you get changed into your pyjamas. "And I'm gonna make you something to eat."
"Ray-" you begin to protest, not wanting him to leave your side.
"Just something quick, a sandwich maybe? And I'll be right back," he promised, helping you stand up as he exchanged your jeans for pyjama pants.
He was so gentle as he helped you into your pyjamas, holding onto your hand as you balanced on one foot to get the other foot into the pants.
He pulled the covers on your bed back and helped you lie down, propping up the pillows and fluffing them up before he pressed a kiss to your forehead.
Ray moved around your kitchen quickly, putting together everything he needed to make a nice, hearty sandwich for you. He also boiled some water for some tea, knowing it'd help you fall asleep.
Once the meal was all made, he brought it to you and sat in bed next to you.
He was patient, letting you continue to talk it all out if you wanted to, but if you didn't, he'd be there to distract you with tidbits about his day or even to just sit there in silence and keep you company as you ate a long overdue meal and sipped on some tea.
He took the empty plate from your lap and placed it on your nightstand before opening up his arms and letting you fall into them again.
He was close enough to press a kiss to your head, play with your hair, and run his fingers along your arms to help you fall asleep faster.
Once he heard your deep breathing, he let out a sigh of relief and popped off his glasses to join you in a your nap.
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a-bang-for-your-bucky · 3 years ago
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The Devil Between Us
Chapter Three: Hard Hitting Facts
read chapter two here
Summary: Matt Murdock is many things. He’s a good man, a good lawyer, and he’s The Devil of Hell’s Kitchen…. You tried your best to accept and love Matt as he is, you tried to love Dare Devil… But what are you supposed to do when Matt chooses The Devil over you…. and his unborn child….
Warnings: ANGST (it's back), Explicit language, talks about gun violence and anti-gun politics (If you have seen The Punisher Season 1, this chapter is based around the interview with Stan Ori.), talks about bombings and terrorism, please let me know if I missed anything!
A/N: Thanks @acrossthesestars for beta reading! You are so appreciated and loved! Moodboard by the talented @mylifeisactuallyamess! We are getting into it now y'all.
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One month later….
Matt lied. 
He lied about everything. He never stopped going out. Deep down, you knew he would never stop. Daredevil was who he was. Maybe even the biggest part. 
What you didn’t expect was for his college girlfriend to come back into the picture. Foggy told you all about her. Elektra had pulled Matt away from his studies, almost causing him to flunk out of law school, until one day she just vanished. Matt never spoke of her again. 
The hardest thing you had ever done was walk away from Matt, still madly in love with him. It was a choice you had to make for the sake of your child. Elektra brought out a darkness in him, one you had never seen before, a darkness you didn’t know he was capable of. And once you found out, you packed your things, for real this time, and found an apartment a few blocks away from Karen. It was small, but it was perfect for you and the baby. 
According to your last appointment you were just at ten weeks. Only about the size of a kumquat, Matt’s child was already causing problems. Why do they call it morning sickness when it lasts all day?, you thought to yourself, exhausted from being up all night vomiting. That night bled into the next morning, and you slept through your alarm. You rushed around the small space to get dressed, already resulting in being late for work. Luckily, you had an understanding boss -mostly. 
The Devil of Hell’s Kitchen was all over the news, online and in the papers. Ellison pressed to get you to write the stories, but you kindly declined, passing them off to Karen. With a sad smile, you told him that she would do a much better job. 
You chose to cover politics. Senior Stan Ori was the politician in question. You had been following his gun control campaign from the beginning, and today, you were interviewing him after the bombings of the ATF field office and the 10Th Precinct Police Station. The bomber had written you a letter, thinking you would understand and agree with his ‘work’ after your involvement in The Punisher case. Your emotions had been running high and you put out a reply without thinking of the consequences, without caring. Things were only made worse when the bomber, now known to be Lewis Wilson, called in while you were on a radio show. You had called him a terrorist, a murderer, a coward and he hadn't taken that lightly. He demanded answers, questioning your responses and loyalties, before calling you a pawn, saying you were just like everyone else, and hanging up.
You were running late. Your alarm didn’t go off, you spilled coffee on your first outfit, and you had the worst time hailing a cab. Rushing into the Royal Hospitality hotel, you hoped and prayed for this to go like any other interview. Smoothing out the wrinkles of your pencil skirt, you went up to the reception desk and gave them your name, flashing your press badge. The woman at the desk made a phone call and asked for you to wait in the lobby. 
Doing as you were asked, you sat down in one of the plush chairs. It wasn’t long until you were greeted by a tall man, armed with a pistol, and a panty dropping smile on his face. “You must be here from The Bulletin.” He said. You flashed him your I.D. and introduced yourself. “Billy Russo. Let me take you to the good senator myself. I just need your weapon.” He did his research, you thought. You handed him your Kimber and he handed it off to a guard, before turning on his heels, walking toward the elevator. 
Billy attempted to make small talk with you. The man was charming, more charming than anyone you’d ever met. There was a smoothness in his voice as he let you know that you were safe as long as he and his men were in the building. You wanted to believe him, but you had a gut feeling something bad was going to happen. Exiting the lift, he walked you to the senator's hotel room door. “Here you are, sweetheart.” Billy said with a toothy grin. 
“Do you call all the girls ‘sweetheart’ or am I just lucky?” You quipped, raising an eyebrow at him. The last thing you wanted was to get involved with anyone, let alone someone like Billy Russo. His whole demeanor told you he was a ladies man, and he fucking knew it.
“If I said you were just lucky?” He purred, flicking his tongue over his bottom lip.
You laughed, “Then I’d tell you I’m not interested.” Billy huffed, crossing his arms over his chest with an amused look plastered on his face. He gazed at you with dark, piercing brown eyes, as if he were trying to hypnotize you. “Look, you strike me as the type of guy who isn’t used to being turned down. I’m pregnant, in a complicated relationship with the father, and still not interested.” You watched his grin drop quickly. You pointed toward the door. “Can I go to work now?” Billy nodded, accepting the rejection. “I do have one question for you, Mr. Russo. If you don’t mind, of course.” 
Billy smirked, obviously curious as to what you wanted to say. “Ask away.” 
You cleared your throat, “An anti-gun senator hiring a military contractor for his personal security, a little hypocritical wouldn’t you say? I can’t wait to see what he has to say about that.” You were confident in your question. Confident enough to see Russo stumble before answering. 
Billy chuckled, “Well, hopefully he says ‘If you want the best, then Anvil is the only choice.’” He paused, before adding, “And if he doesn’t, you can quote me on that.” The smirk returned almost instantly as he knocked on the door, notifying his team inside that you were here. 
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“Can I ask, how did it feel on the radio, when Lewis Wilson threatened your life? Both our lives?” Senator Ori asked, as if he were interviewing you. 
With your notebook in one hand, and your pen in the other, you sighed. “Not good. But that’s just another reality of living in this city, especially as a woman. The world is a dangerous place, Senator.” You crossed one ankle behind the other, leaning forward a bit. “Back to you. I can appreciate everything you are doing here, but rhetoric and real lives, those things are worlds apart.” 
“They don’t have to be.” He replied quickly, shaking his head. 
You scoffed, “Says the man who in an hour will be downstairs with a bunch of New York liberals who paid $10,000 a plate for his campaign.” 
“Not for my campaign, to be clear. All proceeds are for the families of the victims of the bombings.” Senator Ori stated, causing you to mumble a ‘fair enough’ before jotting it down in your notebook. “Money that would not need to be made if there weren’t victims of this senseless violence.” 
You continued your interview, getting into a bit of a debate. It was easy for you, arguing back and forth. You were glad you had your recorder going as your notes were long forgotten, and this was good information for your article. Dare you say that Ellison was going to love it. 
You didn’t realize what was happening until it was over. There was a blast from the door, knocking you down to the floor. The alarm blared loudly as you tried to catch the breath that was knocked from your lungs. You could barely hear what the Anvil guards were saying over the siren. There was another boom, then smoke started to fill the room. You went to sit up with what little strength you had in time to watch the guards fall. A figure, who you assumed was Lewis Wilson, shot them execution style. 
Instinctively, you ducked behind the chair you were sitting in. You watched as a masked man went directly to the senator. Reaching out for your bag, you remembered then that the Anvil personnel took your personal weapon. “Fuck.” 
Senator Ori was begging for his life as he crawled across the room, away from the shooter. When he reached you, you moved in front of him. “Don’t shoot, please. Please, please don’t–” Lewis pulled the trigger, but a large figure jumped in front of the bullet with a grunt. 
You used the distraction to try and run to safety. As you scrambled for your footing, you noticed a gun discarded by a dead body and swiped it, stuffing it into your purse. Stan was right behind you as Lewis flanked in on your right after firing off shots at the other man. Senator Ori used his position to push you right into the crazed man’s arms. 
This is how I die.
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Tags:
@mylifeisactuallyamess
@shakespeareanwannabe
@writeroutoftime
@aleksisok
@afuckingshituniverse
@sofphe
@hellskitchen-whore
@accountdeletedpleasedisregard
@two-unbeatable-beaters
@starry-night-20
@toomanystoriessolittletime
@inpraizeof
@myownwutheringheights
@bugwritesstuff
@morganflo
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bexbaxx · 3 years ago
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What you think about a Christmas or like holiday fic w viktor or silco? 👀 just imagining them despising the holidays (each for their own reasons, like viktor because he has to do more research because of of other researchers taking holiday breaks. And silco because hes just salty and idk hates holidays but secretly loved the presents he receives bec if jinx or reader) like just JDJJSJD IMAGINE READER (not dating viktor yet) STAYING BEHIND AND SPENDING THE HOLIDAYS W HIM IM THE LAB AND MAYBE CONFESSING IN THE PROCESS 👀 or just simply stating they care for him. DIAKDJDJ IM JUST OMF sorry if that was a lot i just oh god Christmas viktor in stress and reader just being there for him w their support and making him something so that he can eat.. im soft oh god 😭😭
(I'm going to focus this request on Viktor, since I thought that was a cute idea! Thank you for this ask it was a lot of fun to write out!)
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You entered the lab, completely unsurprised to see Viktor sat at his workbench, quickly scribbling down something in a book laid out in front of him.
You almost rolled your eyes, but not at Viktor, at Jayce, who currently wasn't present. He had told you he was going to decorate the lab last week, to try to get Viktor in the "holiday spirit", but the lab looked the exact same as it always did.
It was a week into the holidays, and so far he hadn't taken a single day off from his work. You had at first hoped that maybe the holidays would push him to take a break, seeing as everyone else had done exactly that, but it seemed not even that would keep him from this lab.
So, you decided to be a bit bolder than you usually were.
"Hey, Viktor." You called out to him, moving towards where he sat. He startled from his writing, looking towards you with clear confusion written on his face.
"I didn't expect to see you today. You're not off celebrating?"
You set down the container you carried in your arms onto the bench beside him. "Nope! I was kind of thinking... That I'd spend today with you."
"With me?" He almost asked himself, now leaning back on his chair. You were silently hoping he wasn't about to reject your offer, as you found he often did in pursuit of his work.
"I even made some ginger bread cookies!" You announced, moving to open the lid of the plastic container. He rolled his chair towards you, leaning in to get a look.
You gestured for him to take one, and he did so, albeit hesitantly. The cookie itself was crudely decorated in white frosting, and was still warm to the touch.
"Cute." He said simply, before biting off the head. His response was almost immediate. "And delicious! I've never tried these before."
You hadn't seen him smile like that in quite a while.
"Well, I was thinking we could do something today, as a small celebration..." You confessed, now awkwardly averting your gaze in preparation for rejection. "I know you're busy, so I get it if you say no."
He took another bite and a moment to respond, which only made your nerves worsen. Maybe he really didn't want to celebrate with you at all, and you had overstepped.
Finally, he turned to you with a smile, and gently replied. "I'd like that."
You swear your heart actually skipped a beat. Before you could say anything else, he spoke again.
"Ah, also, I've been meaning to ask you. What is that?"
He gestured up to the shelves that hung above the workstation, and you quickly noticed the small, plastic elf dressed in red sat up there, seemingly watching the two of you.
Damn Jayce.
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masterwords · 2 years ago
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you can let it go
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Summary: Hotch & Jess navigate the loss of Haley through her pregnancy-obsession with Stephen King.
Warnings: character death (haley), grief, depression, lots of talk about death
Words: 2.5k
Pairings: None
Notes: For my @badthingshappenbingo card space: GRIEF/MOURNING and written in reply to THIS REQUEST...I hope it's what you were looking for. I read a lot of Stephen King and something about that struck me today when I sat down to write...pregnancy hormones make you a little nutty and I had kind of a cute thought about Haley having some odd thoughts that might strike Hotch years later and draw some interesting points through his grief. I guess. This is very very self-indulgent. (Bad Things Happen Bingo Card is below the cut to save on space. Feel free to send in a request for anything not yet marked off! My BTHB rules/masterlist can be found HERE.)
Read on AO3: you can let it go
**
“What would you do if Jack died?”
Haley was lying awake, sometime deep in the middle of the night. Hours that barely existed, and the numbers on the clock didn't seem to make any real sense. Aaron had just come home from work, was just kicking out of his trousers without even taking the belt out first. There his pants would stay in a pinstripe puddle, beside his crumpled jacket and barely unbuttoned shirt. The tie would complete the heap, because this late at night he just didn't care about anything other than resting his weary bones.
Haley seemed to have other plans. It wasn't uncommon, since she'd gotten pregnant, for her to be awake at odd hours and for the hormones to drive her brain to wild conclusions but this took the cake. Usually it was something benign, like “Should we move? I'm not sure this house has enough space for big birthday parties.” or “How do you feel about haircuts? Should we let him grow his hair long until he asks for a haircut, or should we just make the decision for him?” ...those were things well within his wheelhouse. No, they didn't need to move, their house was plenty big, and he really had no opinion about Jack's hair. It hadn't even crossed his mind that Jack would have hair, if he was being honest. It still all felt surreal. Jack barely resembled a human, all giant head and tiny body curled up and made of flickery white lines against pure black. He'd had a nightmare on the jet just the week before that Jack came out looking exactly like that, made of feathery white lines, insubstantial like Casper the Friendly Ghost.
“I don't know, Haley,” he replied, throwing back the covers and falling heavy into the bed. He curled up on his side and felt the pull at the base of his spine as it rounded and stretched after a day spent stunted in his office chair. “Why?”
She hummed thoughtfully. “In the book I'm reading, the little boy just died. He was only two, hit by a truck. And there's this ancient burial ground that can bring things back to life...” She yawned and watched as his eyes slipped shut, already finished with this conversation.
“Haley, I don't think you should read Stephen King books before bedtime anymore...” It was mostly a joke, but there was some bone-tired truth to it. He just wanted to sleep for a few hours before his alarm went off to tell him another day was starting. Her father had gifted her a stack of them, right from his own collection, and it was already ruining their lives. She had a lot of time to rest and read. Her pregnancy hadn't been easy, and they were looking at bed rest sooner rather than later...her father was trying to get her to slow down, but Aaron thought maybe scary books wasn't the right direction. She was supposed to be relaxing, not getting worked up.
“I'm not scared, Aaron, just curious. Would you take him to that burial ground and try to bring him back? If you could? Because the man in this story, he's going to do it and I know it's going to go bad, but I think I would do it too...”
Aaron sighed and pressed his face into the pillow. His head was starting to throb, right behind his eyebrows. He hadn't slept more than a few hours in the last two days. “I don't know what I'd do. I can't imagine.”
“What about me?”
He sighed deep and grunted a little, pushing up onto his elbows to try and stay awake. “What about you what?” He was getting restless now, worked up over not being able to just go to sleep.
“If I died. Would you go bury me and hope I came back to you? Even if you knew it would probably go bad? If you might be married to a zombie?”
He thought about that night as he stood, his tie a dreadfully tight noose around his neck, greeting mourners in the marble hall. A few feet away stood Jessica, in many ways his other half, separated by a canyon so great he wasn't sure he could survive it. Every cell in his being ached to jump to hers, attach themselves, bear the grief of Haley's death together. But she was holding her mother in a trembling hug, and her father stared off like a man who was the recent recipient of a frontal lobotomy. Dead eyes, he thought. Roy had dead eyes.
“What about me?” he thought as he loaded a plate with food he didn't really intend to eat but he'd been told by more than one person to get some before it was gone, and he couldn't bear it again. What about her? For starters, when she asked him that question, things had been different. She hadn't foreseen her own death, no, but she also assumed they'd stay married, didn't she? Still, in spite of that, he supposed right now if he had a chance to give Jack his mother back in any capacity, he might be tempted. Even if it went bad. He remembered her telling him about the ending, and it had chilled him to the bone to think about even then. The loss, anyway. Scare tactics in books and movies didn't really phase him anymore, he'd seen too much. They also brought him no joy.
“Aaron,” Jessica said, coming up behind him, her hand on the small of his back. It didn't startle him. “Why don't you go get some air? You've been on your feet all day here. Let me take the reins for a while.”
“I'll be alright,” was his reply, because how could he take that advice from a woman who had just lost her sister? Her childhood best friend? Someone whom she had a secret language with, a bond closer than anyone, how? I'm going to eat this turkey cranberry roll and carry on. That's what he thought, anyway, but what he said was about the only thing he could think to say after arriving at the funeral home at 5am to meet and go over last-minute interment arrangements before making his way for the hall to make sure the catering service and florists could get in and do what they needed. He was spent, but he was working and that helped. He needed to keep busy, to be useful. “Thank you, Jess.”
She punched him in the arm. It was more of a nudge with her knuckles and stuck her tongue out. Her eyes were still sad, still red-rimmed and ready to spill more tears at the mere mention of Haley's name...but she would always try to make a situation lighter if she could. “Whatever. Your funeral.” Of course, she would say that. Jessica Brooks, queen of foot in mouth. They both smiled and let out small, stifled bits of inappropriate laughter for no real reason. They'd crossed the threshold into madness hours before, now they were simply exhausted and running on fumes.
At Haley's house, he and Jessica set to boxing up her things. Untouched things covered in a thin layer of dust after so many months sitting silent while she ran from the man who would eventually end her life anyway. Best laid plans. New Jersey, she'd been in New Jersey for a time. He'd never spent much time there; it was more of a pass-through state, but he wondered if Jack might like to go back for a visit sometime. If he had a favorite park, or store or movie theater. Something to think about.
There was a pile of library books in a basket beside her favorite chair, parenting books and children's picture books. He wondered how big the fees would be, and the idea of taking them in and settling that debt dropped a rock the size of his fist into his belly. It hurt.
In the bathroom he heard heavy things dropping into a garbage can, plastic on plastic. Her makeup, being discarded bit by bit by her sister. Eye shadow palettes, bags full of expensive lipstick, nail polish in varying shades of reds and pinks...all trash. He opened up one of the parenting books to where she'd last marked the page and found a small slip of notebook paper jammed inside, her looping handwriting jotting down notes and page numbers, references to return to. His lungs ceased, and he pressed his finger to the first number, 14, before turning back to find some connection with her there on the page. The book, written for the sole purpose of helping single mothers raise boys into men, made him feel ill.
“Whatcha looking at?” Jess asked, dragging the full garbage can out of the bathroom behind her. Shampoo bottles crested the top beside half-used bottles of cleaning supplies and he couldn't pull his eyes from the page.
“Library books,” he muttered, scanning the page until he found it, something he thought would have caught her eye. From behind him, closer now, Jess let out a sick sounding chuckle. Not exactly happy.
“Bet the late fees are astronomical.”
“I'll take care of it.”
He did. They were understanding. In his pocket was a copy of the death certificate, he understood how most of these places worked when it came to money. Settling her accounts at the bank, closing everything in her name down and transferring all of Jack's things to him as the sole parent/guardian had required a stack of death certificate copies and a few official to boot. “We don't need that,” the librarian said with a soft, sad smile. “I can have the fees waived; the books look like they're all in excellent condition.”
He nodded, a solemn thing, and started to walk away with a quiet thank you before stopping. Before his feet wouldn't move and he shifted, turned on his heel.
“Can you tell me if you have Pet Sematary in? By Stephen King?”
A knowing look told him that he hadn't needed to give her the author name, everyone knew that story. Something was pulling at him. What about me? Well, what about it? He didn't have access to that kind of magic this side of the page, but maybe he could read what had spooked her and settle a bit that his decision ultimately when he told her no, he wouldn't do it, still made sense. That his grief would not upset him so terribly that he took chances on black magic and evil things to overcome nature.
But then, grief was carrying him toward that book, and it was going to make him read it. Something he had no interest in, and knew was going to unsettle him, fill him with regret. He hated reading about awful things in his spare time, spent too much of his life dealing with the real-life versions. But now he was going to let his grief resurrect that moment with her when all was hope and future, nothing substantial was past yet.
“Ugh, not you too,” Jess said, breezing into his house the next morning with a bag of Jack's toys she'd left in her car overnight after finishing at Haley's house. She poked at the book and scrunched her nose.
He regarded her from behind thickly hooded eyes, he'd been up all-night reading, unable to sleep. The book was getting to him already and he was only barely tiptoeing near the untimely death of Gage Creed. Without skipping a beat, Jess reached into her purse and pulled out her own copy...well, not her own, it was Haley's. He recognized it, the dog-eared pages and little spots of pink highlighter. “She gave it to me to read three years ago, but Aaron I hate these types of books...there isn't any mystery. You already know from the start that he's going to do everything wrong, that things are going to go horribly bad. Where's the fun?”
He shrugged listlessly. “I suppose it's in the anticipation, wondering at the turn of each page if that's when the bad things start happening...”
She set her book down beside his with an irritated little puffing sound and walked down the hallway to toss the bag of toys into Jack's bedroom. They could set it up later, the kid was at school, being normal, pretending that life was okay and that mommy was going to come home from a long time away just like daddy did sometimes. He'd already forgotten the blood, or at least packed it away for some day when he was older, when he would see something and it would crash that neat little box wide open.
Aaron was dressed, he'd brushed his teeth, he kept getting up and going through the motions with a hollow feeling in his chest where his heart should have been. Calls from realtors went to voicemail, word got around fast. That house, no matter what happened, would rake in a pretty penny and they all wanted to offer him condolences and deals.
“Are you going to sell it?” Jess asked, flopping down on the couch beside him, hugging a pillow to her chest. He let out a shaky sigh and lay his head back against the cushions.
“Yes.”
That wasn't in question. He had no use for it. He had two homes, both of which were marred by the stench of blood. Foyet had taken from him two homes. But he could stay here, somehow, this blood was his and he could live with it. Live around it. He couldn't live with Haley's. He clenched his fist against his thigh and felt his knuckles crack and pop painfully in their bruised, swollen joints.
“When?”
He frowned and felt the hot sting of tears in his eyes. “Maybe when I finish that damn book.”
She nodded. Somehow the madness in it made sense to her. She let her head fall to the side, rest on his shoulder, and they settled into their daily routine. Getting the tears out now, while Jack was away. They would sit and think about where it all went wrong in the dead silence of his apartment and wonder where they went from there, the same thoughts every day. By the time Jack was home, smiling and asking what was for dinner, the flush of sadness had past, and they could breathe. At least for a time.
“Daddy?” Jack asked, pushing a pile of peas and carrots around on his plate with one little finger. He looked thoughtful, pensive. He looked just like Haley, frighteningly so. “Can we go see where mommy's sleeping? I think she needs new flowers. Macie from my class says she takes her daddy new flowers every single week...”
“Sure buddy. As soon as you eat your veggies, we'll go. Does Aunt Jess want to come too?”
“Do I want to go?” she asked, a fresh sting of tears burned hot, and she blinked hard, swiped at her eyes and gave Jack a bright, bright smile. “Of course, I do.”
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shinazugawaswife · 4 years ago
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If You Love Him - Harry Styles
This is based on the song If You Love Her by Forest Blakk
This song breaks my heart every time I listen to it, and I just thought of this idea. It honestly made me so sad to write and I really got in my feels, so I’m sorry beforehand if it’s too sad, but I’m actually really proud of it so I hope you enjoy<3 (Olivia Wilde appears in this, and it’s in no way meant negatively towards her) 
Summary: you have a hard time living without Harry, and when you find out he’s seeing someone else it breaks your heart and you write a song to his new lover
Warnings: none, it’s just sad:’(
Not my gif, so creds to the owner
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You sat in front of the piano, fingers brushing the keys, just barely touching them. You've been crying all day it felt like, and now you just felt numb. You were absolutely drained of all your energy and you felt like you could fall asleep on the spot, but every time you tried closing your eyes, old memories flooded your brain a thousand miles per hour and prevented sleep from taking you with it.
You missed him, fuck you missed him so much. It was so hard just breathing without him and it felt like climbing a mountain just getting through one day without Harry beside you. You barely slept, just the thought of waking up and not seeing him in bed next to you, was enough to start a waterfall of tears streaming down your face. Every day you were in physical pain too, your stomach was in knots, your head was pounding from all the crying and your body had gotten so used to just laying in bed that your muscles had started hurting too from lack of use.
Every day was a hell to go through, but today had been the worst without a doubt. Nothing could ever compare to the feeling you'd felt when you’d checked Twitter that morning and saw rumors that Harry had found someone new. It had been all over the internet after a picture had been caught of him and someone else from the night before. Even though your brain had begged you to stop looking at the pictures and just turn off your phone, you'd spent the entire morning reading articles and fan theories. Eventually, it had hurt more than you could bear and you'd put down your phone and spent the rest of the day soaking your pillow from your unstoppable fountain of tears.
Now it was some time in the middle of the night, maybe around 3 a.m? You honestly didn't know. You hadn't touched your phone since you'd tossed it away earlier and you hadn't moved from your bed until an hour ago when you'd made your way to the piano in your living room.
One time what felt like an eternity ago, Harry had found you absolutely devasted after you thought a heavy argument with one of your close friends had led to the end of your friendship, and he'd told you: "some times emotions are easier to feel if you express them through music" and he'd made you sit down on the same piano bench you were sitting on now, listening while you wrote a song about every emotion that you'd felt. You remembered how he'd been right, that the feelings had actually been more bearable after you'd sang the words. Maybe it would work that way this time too? Honestly, at this point, you were willing to try anything to minimize the painful aching in your chest.
You'd just been staring at the piano in front of you for the last hour though, no words coming to mind that could express exactly what you were feeling. You kept thinking of Harry with this new person: was he with her right now, lying next to her in bed? Were they cuddling? Did he pull her tight to his chest while his head rested atop of hers as he'd always done with you? Were they having deep pillow talks till far into the night, like the two of you used to? Did he touch her the way he'd touched you? Did her entire body ignite whenever he kissed her, as yours had always done?
You knew who she was, Olivia Wilde, the director of the movie Harry had worked so hard on the last couple of months. You remembered the day he'd come home, so excited that he'd gotten the role in the movie, and you'd been equally as excited for him and so fucking proud. Not once had you imagined that you'd be sitting here now, while Harry was starting a new relationship with her. Was she treating him right? You fucking hoped so. Even though you wanted to hate her with your entire being, you couldn't seem to be mad at her. Maybe she was giving him what you couldn't, maybe he was happier with her. God, he deserved to be so happy.
Suddenly a thought formed in your head and the fingers that had only been lightly touching the piano keys now pressed down to make the instrument play out a soft melody.
Take it If he gives you his heart Don't you break it
Your voice was weak as it escaped from your lips. You hadn't spoken to a lot of people the past couple of weeks, having barely used your voice and you couldn't even remember the last time you'd been singing. Losing Harry had made you shy away from your passion for music and writing, too many memories.
Let your arms be a place He feels safe in He's the best thing that you'll ever have
You kept going as the words formed in your head, directing the song to Harry's new lover. Even though it brought you so much pain to see Harry with someone else, you were willing to let him go if she was for him what he needed. All you wanted was for him to be happy and complete, you wanted him to have the world and you'd never been able to give him that.
Memories started appearing in your head like flashbacks behind your closed eyelids. Memories that you and Harry had shared, memories that made you smile slightly even though it shattered your heart to know that you would never share moments like them with him again. While being with Harry, you were the happiest you'd ever been and maybe you were never gonna feel that again, but it was okay as long as he was happy.
He always has trouble Falling asleep And he likes to cuddle While under the sheets
You'd spent many long nights next to Harry in bed, running your fingers through his hair and speaking softly to help him find sleep when it had been so hard for him. He'd always told you how there was no feeling that could compare to being curled up to you in bed, holding you so close to him that you could hear his heartbeat. The most peaceful moments you'd ever experienced with him were these intimate moments where you never wanted to move out of his embrace, praying that you could just stay in his arms forever.
Reality hit you now, that those moments were long gone, but you just wished with all your heart that she would hug him just the way he loved it and that she would be there for him during those sleepless nights he had when adrenaline wouldn't stop running through his body after working too much, or whenever a storm of thoughts in his head was keeping him awake.
He loves Pop songs And dancing, and bad trash TV
Harry's taste in music had always been something else. It was so wide, almost every genre of music was presented on his playlist, but you remembered you'd been surprised when you found all the cliche pop songs on there. You knew, of course, that Harry had spent five years in a boyband, singing pop songs, but to you, he just hadn't seemed like the type to listen to Ariana Grande and Katy Perry, but you'd been so wrong.
You couldn't count how many romcoms and shitty reality shows you'd watched with Harry during your time together. He'd always found them very enjoyable, and you would be lying if you didn't enjoy the times you'd been cuddled up to him on the couch while watching Love Island and discussing all the people you voted for and all the people you absolutely couldn't stand with each other.
He loves love notes and babies And likes giving gifts
A single tear escaped your eye and ran down your cheeks at the thought of all the love notes Harry had given you in the past. After you'd started dating, you'd worn his clothes so much, just because it smelled like him. His hoddies, shirts, sweatpants, jackets, you'd stolen it all from him, you're excuse being that it was more comfortable than your own clothes. Harry had never minded though, in fact, he'd always loved to see you walk into the kitchen in his shirt in the mornings or walk out of the house in a pair of his sweatpants paired with something like a white tank top.
At some point, he started putting little notes in the pockets of his hoddies or pants, knowing you'd put the items on the next day and find the sweet notes he hid. It was just small things like I love you or have a great day, love or excited to see you tonight, but they had always melted your heart, making you love him just that more.
Has a hard time accepting A good compliment
Harry had always showered you with compliments, every chance he got, always making you smile. You'd always made sure to tell Harry what an amazing person he was and how talented he was, how beautiful his music was and how absolutely gorgeous he looked, and every single time a sweet comment like that had left your mouth, Harry had blushed slightly while looking down at his feet. He would start making excuses, saying that it was nothing special every time you were amazed by a new song he'd written, and telling you he didn't know what you were talking about every time you'd told him how good he looked.
Knowing that he'd never been good at receiving compliments, you'd made sure to attack him with them all the time, and even though he never admitted it, you knew he thought about your words with a lot of consideration, eventually, you hoped, he started believing them.
You just wanted her to keep telling him those sweet things every day because he needed to hear them.
He loves his whole family And all of his friends
You thought of Harry's family and how he'd been so proud when he'd introduced you to them for the first time. He always put his family above everyone and though he didn't see them as much as he wanted to, he made sure that they never questioned how much they meant to him.
You'd admired the relationship he had with his family, especially his mother and sister, you could just tell how much he adored them. You'd never really had a home with that kind of love. You were an only child, so no siblings, and your mother had passed away while you were still young, leading your father into years of alcoholism and depression.
You'd never felt safe and loved until you met Harry, he was your family. That was probably the hardest part for you to let go of, the feeling of safety you'd had whenever you were wrapped in his arms or from simply being in the same room as him.
He was such a giving person, never asking for much. He had a lot of friends and they all adored him, how could they not? He had this ability to make you feel so special and he was such a good listener too, giving you all his attention whenever you told him something, not letting anything distract him.
So if you're the one he lets in Take it If he gives you his heart Don't you break it Let your arms be a place He feels safe in He's the best thing that you'll ever have He'll love you If you love him
You sang, and god, the words hurt. It felt like your chest was being pried open and your heart ripped out and shredded into pieces. You had to mov eon though, for your own good. You never wanted to forget Harry, he would always have a piece of you, but this grieve that you were feeling had to decrease, you could barely live a life when it hurt so bad.
If Olivia was the one for Harry, then so be it, if she made him happy you couldn't argue. Obviously you hadn't made him as happy as he'd made you, but you hadn't realized that until he'd walked out the door and it was too late. He had let go of you and now it was time for you to do the same, you just wanted, no needed her to treat him right.
On days when It feels like the whole World might cave in Stand side by side And you'll make it He's the best thing that you'll ever have He'll love you If you love him like that
You always thought that Harry and you could get through anything, and your relationship had been put to a lot of tests throughout your time together but never had you thought that one of these obstacles would actually get the better of you.
You remembered that day so clearly. The day your whole world fell apart slowly with every step Harry took towards your front door, and it all crashed down on you when he sat down in his car and drove away without even one last glance in your direction. You hadn't talked to him after that, but still, he remained the single thing on your mind 24/7. It hurt you how quickly he had moved on, but you couldn't be mad because you felt at blame for your relationship ending in the first place.
Harry had always said that as long as you stood together, then absolutely nothing could come in the way of you two, and the only time you hadn't been side by side, that's when you fell apart. You'd always appreciated him so much, sometimes you'd thought it was impossible to care so much for another human as you cared about Harry.
Your hands started shaking a bit and you could feel the tears slowly appearing in the corner of your eyes. You would never stop caring about Harry, he had such an impact on your life, what were you supposed to do without him? God, would this pain ever stop? As you started the second verse, the tears escaped your eyes and silently ran down your cheeks.
Kiss him with passion As much as you can
You missed kissing Harry. Just his touch had been such an essential part of your day and now that you didn't get to feel that, you needed it more than anything. When you thought of it, it was as if you could still feel his lips on yours, kissing you softly.
You'd kissed a number of guys before you met Harry and you'd thought all of them had been fairly good, but that was until you kissed Harry. You'd shared your first kiss one day while you'd been chilling at Harry's and he just couldn't stop himself as you'd stood in his kitchen and looked so beautiful. You knew Harry had experience, but you remember being completely taken aback by how comfortable the kiss was. It wasn't too wet, but not entirely without his tongue roaming your mouth either. He'd grabbed your waist while your arms snaked their way around his neck, and he'd tasted good after the smoothies he'd made for the two of you earlier that day. You hadn't been able to get enough and he had seemed to have the same problem because you'd barely taken your hands off each other for the rest of the night.
Harry was a very affectionate person and he’d loved holding you, kissing you, just touching you in general. It had made you feel so loved and now where that feeling had belonged in your chest, was just emptiness. You were certain no one could ever make you feel the way Harry had, he could make your entire body feel like it was on fire just by holding your hand.
Run your hands through his hair Whenever he's sad
It wasn't often Harry had been sad in front of you, let alone cried, but it had happened a couple of times, and many times he'd come home and you'd been able to see that something was wrong, but he would deny it. It wasn't because he’d been embarrassed to be sad in front of you, but he’d often pushed it away because he didn't want to burden you. You knew him well though and you could tell the second he would walk in the door, that something was wrong. If he didn't want to talk about it, mostly you'd just put a romcom on the television and pulled him into your arms while you'd cuddled on the sofa, gently running your fingers through his soft curls. You would do anything to brush your fingers through his hair right now...
And when he doesn't notice How amazing he is Tell him over and over
So he never forgets
On the outside, Harry had always made a great effort to appear confident and independent, but when you'd managed to get to know him behind that exterior, you'd discovered that he had a bunch of his own insecurities. He always questioned if his music was good enough, if his performances were good enough, if he was a good idol, if he deserved everything he had, if he was good enough.
Once you'd found out he felt this way a lot of the time, you'd always made sure to tell him how absolutely extraordinary you thought he was. You hoped that she would tell him too, help him build a better image of himself in his head.
You managed to get through the chorus again before your feelings became too overwhelming and you had to stop. Your fingers halted on the piano while your tears had become slightly more uncontrollable.
You couldn't help but think that you were pathetic for sitting here when Harry had clearly moved on with someone else. You'd realized how much your joy had depended on him, but you had to be able to live a life without him. How could you move on when Harry had completed you though?
It was cliche, but you felt like you were missing a part of you and without Harry, you would never be able to get it back. It was like he'd been too good for you, so he had been taken away from you. You had always known you didn't deserve him, but you'd tried your very hardest to be worthy of his love, but you weren't and now someone was making you pay for those years where you'd been granted his affection without actually deserving it.
What were you supposed to do? How the fuck were you supposed to live a life when your source of happiness had been taken away from you?
With tears still in your eyes and your body shaking, you removed yourself from the piano and went back to bed, hoping that maybe tomorrow would be the day he would come knocking at your door, because moving on from him clearly wasn’t an option...
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A/n: I've got a bunch of requests that's been sitting in my inbox for so long and I'm sorry I haven't gotten around to them. A bunch of them are with JJ and I just haven't been in the mood to write for him lately, I've just kinda been diving deeper and deeper into my Harry obsession (when am I not), but I'll get around to them at some point. Again I'm really sorry, school is just really stressing me out too, so I haven't been writing much at all, please don't stop requesting though<3
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dreamescapeswriting · 4 years ago
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The Coordinates Of My Heart ~ JJK [Request]
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WORD COUNT: 2.4K
GENRE: Angst, fluffy ending, established relationship
PAIRING: Jungkook x fem!reader
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It was no secret that Jungkook had tattoos all over his body, everyone had seen them by now but not every single tattoo that covered him. There was one very secret tattoo that nobody except for you and Jungkook knew about...Well, you, Jungkook and his ex-girlfriend that was. It was only a small tattoo on his left peck but it was one of the biggest mistakes Jungkook had ever made in his life, the whole time he was getting his collection of tattoos he swore he would never have someone's name tattooed onto his body and yet there it sat. Black ink across his peck with her name in cursive writing with a small heart attached at the end, "SeoJun" The tattoo bothered you a lot but you would never let that show in front of Jungkook. You'd been dating for almost three years now so you never brought it up except for the first time he showed you. He wanted you to know that she meant nothing to him anymore but that it was there and something he had to deal with. 
It was still a crushing feeling to see another girls name tattooed on his body and him always saying that he would never do it again, never tattoo a name across him anywhere on his body. You knew he was thinking rationally but there was a part of you inside that cried out to know why he wouldn't put your name on himself instead but the other part of you thought rationally. He probably didn't want to chance it by getting your name tattooed anywhere on himself and having the relationship fall through. 
"Baby I'm so tired," Jungkook groaned that morning as he walked down the stairs to you in the living room he was shirtless and wearing a pair of shorts, you were trying to convince him to go swimming with you. It was his week off from the studio, he took it off to spend time with you but for the last six days he'd done nothing but lay in bed gaming or go out to dinner with his friends, or hang out with the boys. 
"I'm only asking for this one thing baby...Please! I don't want to go alone." You giggled to him as you tugged on his hands trying to convince him to go with you, he looked at you tiredly as he shook his head.
"I'm busy today," He mumbled as he took his arm out of your grasp, ignoring the look of confusion written across your face as he walked into the kitchen. Jungkook hadn't told you he'd made plans with anyone which was why you'd woken him up in the first place if you'd have known he was busy you would have left him. Following after him, you went into the kitchen and he began to make himself something to eat,
"Busy with what? We haven't hung out all week, you said you took the week off to spend time with me." You uttered you knew it probably sounded as though you were being childish but right now you didn't care, you'd missed your boyfriend and this week it felt like you saw him less than you did when he was actually working. 
"I actually said I took the week off to relax, so far I haven't done any of that." He grumbled as he began pouring himself a bowl of cereal, not meeting your eyes as he spoke. Rolling your eyes at him you shook your head, 
"You've relaxed plenty, all you've done is game and sleep...As well as go to lunch, or spent time with friends...W-What if we went for walk instead? Namjoon said he found this really cute hiking trail..." You trailed off when you realised Jungkook was more interested in the phone that was sitting in his hand than he was in listening to you talk to him. The thought of him ignoring you was heartbreaking enough, you began to overthink everything, maybe he was getting bored of being with you...
"But of course, I wouldn't want to take you away from what is really important." You grumbled to him referring to the phone before storming out of the kitchen and into the living room to grab your swimming bag to go alone since he wasn't that bothered about you anymore.
"Are you upset because I won't hang out with you?! We don't have to be around each other 24/7 Y/n." He followed you into the living room staring into your eyes as he waited for you to say something back to him. He didn't mean for it to come out as harsh as the way it was.
"No, but it would be nice if my own boyfriend wanted to do something with me. Watch a movie, go for a walk, order food. All you've been bothered about is gaming or hanging with the guys, we haven't done anything this week." He rolled his eyes at you before going back into the kitchen without another word in your direction. You knew it wasn't supposed to start a fight but there was a part inside of you that wanted answers from him. 
"Tell me I'm wrong then. Tell me one time this week you've even wanted or offered to hang out with me." You stated as you walked back into the kitchen, he put his bowl down into the sink shaking his head at you. 
"I've been busy. I'm doing stuff all week, I don't need you jumping down my neck-" He stopped talking when his phone began to ring on the table in front of him for a second you could have sworn a panicked look spread across his face. Out of habit your eyes glanced down to see who it was but as soon as you saw the name you wish you hadn't. SEOJUN. Was written across the screen in big bold writing with a broken heart beside her name just like the tattoo Jungkook had only the heart was broken. 
"W-Why is she calling you?" Instead of answering you Jungkook just turned the phone over so you couldn't see it and shook his head at the question. 
"Jungkook..." You whispered feeling insecure at the thought of him starting to see her again, it wasn't that you didn't trust him. It was Seojun that you didn't trust. She was manipulative and cunning. She always got whatever it was she wanted if she used the right way on Jungkook it was like she had a spell on him.
"Y/n it's not what it looks like, she's just started to say sorry to me that's all. She wants to make up for all the awful things that happened, she opened up her new shop so I've been going to help-" The look on your face made Jungkook stop talking instantly and he knew he fucked up, it was a look of sadness and anger as you realised he'd been spending all of his time with her. 
"S-So you've been spending time with her? On your week off..." He nodded his head slowly not wanting to lie to you about where he had been anymore, 
"Because I knew if I told you, you would be upset-" He tried to rationalise it but you cut him off,
"Of course I would! You've been spending all of your free time with your ex-girlfriend and lying to me about it!" You yelled out as you stared down at his phone, it was starting to ring again but you both ignored it this time letting it go to voicemail.
"I was just helping out with her shop, she's straightened herself out." You scoffed at the thought of it all and the phone began to ring again, it was clear she wasn't going to quit calling him until he finally answered her call. 
"So she's trying to get back with you?" You questioned as you stared at him folding your arms over your chest,
"No! She's trying to say sorry..." You rolled your eyes at the statement, at how naive he was being about all of it and began walking away from him not wanting to listen to this.
"Am I not allowed, friends?!" He snapped at you making you turn to face him you were angrier now at the fact that he was making it seem like you were forcing him not to talk to her, 
"You can be friends with whoever you want...B-But didn't you think about how this would make me feel? Seeing her again? When she's literally tattooed across your chest?!" He heard the crack in your voice as you stormed out of the door, leaving him alone in the world of his own thoughts. He knew how much the tattoo hurt you even if you refused to show him that sometimes, he groaned picking up his phone to her. 
"I'll be running late today, come by about 2 pm? The place will be empty and it'll be just me and you, like old times." He sighed as he heard her voice down the other side of the phone, 
"We should stop, she's suspicious..." He whispered to Seojun as he walked out of the kitchen and towards the front door, you were sitting in the car so he walked up the stairs to talk. 
You whimpered as you got into your car, starting up the engine and driving off towards the pool. You didn't even need to go, you just had to be out of the house for a while to let your brain cool down from what was happening, you were probably just overreacting to it all. 
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When you came in after swimming the house was empty, all of the lights were off so you knew Jungkook must have been out or up in bed asleep but it was only 7 pm so that was unlikely true. You dropped your keys down in the small bowl by the front door and kicked off your shoes wanting nothing more than to snuggle up beside Jungkook and say sorry for that morning but he wasn't there so you went for the next best thing. Having a shower and curling up in one of his shirts while you waited for him to come home, you'd left him some texts but if he was still upset about this morning you doubted he would answer you. 
As you walked into the kitchen you saw a note on the door, 
Went out to think. Don't wait up. Love you. x x x JJK x x x You smiled halfheartedly as you read the note from him to you and screwed it up before putting it into the bin. All you had to do was remind yourself that Jungkook loved you, he would never do anything to hurt you.
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Later that night Jungkook pulled up outside the house and saw your car, 
"I'll call you later, Y/n's home so I'm going to talk to her if she's awake," Jungkook said to Seojun who hummed before hanging upon him. He shut the door carefully and headed up to the front door, it was almost 12 pm so you were most likely asleep in bed but when he walked into the living room you were out cold on the sofa. Draped in one of his jumpers and a pair of shorts with a blanket around you, the TV was playing to itself all of their Bangtan bombs and he smiled to himself. At least you weren't too angry at him to fall asleep to his voice, he turned off the TV and headed into the kitchen. 
A small hissing noise made you wake up when you heard small grunts of pain, 
"Guk?" You moaned out as you rubbed your eyes, the kitchen light was on and the moaning was coming from there. Terror ripped through you at the thought of him and someone else being in there together but Jungkook would never do that...Would he? Slowly sliding off the sofa you tip-toed into the kitchen to see Jungkook with his back to you, he was hissing as he pulled something off his chest, 
"Kookie? What's going on?" Jungkook jumped as your voice suddenly filled the air, he turned to face you and you saw what he was struggling to do. There was fresh clingfilm wrapped around his chest along with some pads, 
"Jungkook?" You frowned walking further into the kitchen as you helped him take off the cling film, 
"I did something." He mumbled as he took your hands into his own to stop you from removing the rest of it all, 
"We have to talk..." You stared into his eyes waiting for him to continue and he looked down, 
"I know how much the tattooed bothered you without you saying anything...That's the reason I've been seeing Seojun so much, she runs her own tattoo parlour instead of working for other people now..." You remembered him telling you once that she worked as a tattooist in someone else's shop, 
"S-So you went to her to get a tattoo done? Why didn't you tell me?" He let go of your wrists and allowed you to keep unwrapping the clingfilm until it got to the end and the flower could be seen, 
"Because we were working on something I couldn't tell you about," Sitting on his left peck, covering the entire muscle was a huge tattoo of your birth flower. Tears began to well up in your eyes as you stared at the masterpiece, 
"The best part." He whispered as he took your hand carefully and lead it over to the middle of his chest, written in small black in were some coordinates. 
"Do you know what that is?" You stared at them with a frown on your face shaking your head at him trying to work it out, 
"It's the coordinates of where I first told you that I loved you," You stared at the coordinates before wrapping your arms around the back of his neck and dragging him into a passionate kiss. Tugging him closer to you until he hissed out in pain, 
"S-Sorry, the tattoo is sore." He chuckled as you looked at it again, 
"Where's your cream? I'll apply it and then we can go to bed?" You questioned as he nodded at you, telling you where the cream he used for all his tattoo's was kept and went to sit on the sofa for you. Smiling happily as he waited for you to come back to him.
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Tagline: @lyoongx​ @mitzwinchester​ @fan-ati--c​ @rjsmochii​ @kneel-begyourpardon​ @taestannie​ @bisexualmess007​ @innersooya​ @sw33tnight​ @jin-from-the-block​ @sweeneyblue1​
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solarwonux · 4 years ago
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Sugar || Wonwoo
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gamer!wonwoo x f!reader
w.c: 2.2k
warnings: smut, unprotected sex, fluff
note: this is one of my fav one shots I have written lol, its so cute and fluffy and honestly who does not love gamer!wonwoo!!!! Anyway, I hope you like this one it is one of my older ones but a good one (i think), let me know your thoughts <3
drabble game || masterlist 
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You could hear Wonwoo cursing in his office at his computer screen for what seemed like the hundredth time that night, driving you insane. Normally, you wouldn’t have minded, watching him react to the game he was playing was one of your favorite sources of entertainment. And It was no wonder people tuned in twice a week to watch him play while he streamed.
But tonight, you were due to finish your senior thesis and the words weren’t coming in. You had spent all day working around your apartment, turning over sentences in your head as you thought of ways to finish off your thesis. But when you had sat down in front of your coffee table to finally begin writing after finishing all the chores you had tasked yourself in doing. Your mind went blank. You had spent the following hours writing and rewriting growing even more frustrated when you realized that you had hit a wall.
Slamming your laptop shut, you rested your head on top of your coffee table, tracing over the lines in the wood with your index finger. Listening to Wonwoo’s laughter as he continued talking to his webcam, cursing whenever something didn’t go his way. You sighed wishing you weren’t contemplating barging into the office and pulling out the power chord to his gaming set up, as a means to silence him. Though you knew it would just lead to a fight and as annoyed as you were, that was the last thing you wanted.
Sighing, you got up from your spot on the floor and walked slowly to the office and gently knocked on the door. You wrapped your cardigan around your torso tightly while you waited for him to open it. You knew asking him to keep it down was useless, considering that it hadn't worked before, but you were out of options.
“Yes, baby.” Wonwoo smiled at you widely once he had finished opening the door. His headset around his neck, his round glasses slowly sliding off the bridge of his nose and his hair sticking up in places he had tugged on out of frustration.
“How long are you gonna stay on tonight?” You leaned up running a delicate hand through his hair attempting to fix it.
“Not sure…Seungcheol on too and we just started playing this new game that came out.” He finished pushing his glasses up his nose. “Why, what’s wrong?” He reached over smoothing over the creases that had formed between your brows.
“Umm…it’s nothing.” You shook your head. “But could you at least try to keep it down a little.” You pouted forming prayer hands in front of you. Wonwoo chuckled and pecked your lips softly. “I’ll try, have you finished your thesis yet?”
“Almost.” You smiled widely, hating yourself for lying to him, knowing that if you had told him the truth, he would’ve shut down the game and sat with you until you finished. And you couldn’t do that to him knowing how excited he got for his streams. Remembering how he kept tabs on comments that he’d find funny just so he’d be able to tell you about them later.
“Does that mean you’ll come sit with me when you finish.” He rubbed soothing circles on your chin as he looked down at you with that certain look you could never say no too. “Mhm.” You nodded and pecked his nose making him scrunch it up. “Now go before someone thinks you’ve gone missing.” You shoved him into the room lightly making him laugh.
“Impossible, they know I’m with my crazy, beautiful, sexy, cool girlfriend.” He winked at you as he sat down in his gaming chair, throwing you a kiss as he put on his headset again. You closed the door shaking your head, sighing in frustration as you leaned your forehead against it. Wishing you didn’t care and support Wonwoo’s hobby that had quickly turned into his second job as much as you did.
Knowing you weren’t going to get anywhere with your thesis, you decided to go take a shower. Hoping the hot water hitting your tense muscles will help clear the whirlwind going on in your head.
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Feeling a lot lighter after your shower you wrapped a towel around your body. You walked out of your fogged-up bathroom and went to your dresser sitting down. Grabbing your body butter and lathering it around on your legs slowly kneading out the tension, then doing the same to the rest of your body. Once you finished you picked up your towel that had fallen onto the floor and before you could wrap it around yourself again, Wonwoo cursed loudly causing you to jump. You sighed and stormed out of your bedroom, opening up the door to the office and throwing your towel angrily at him.
“What the hell baby?” He exclaimed, jumping slightly from his chair angrily clicking on his computer mouse. “I’m in the middle of a game.” He groaned doing a double-take the second he realized you were standing naked with your hands on your waist in the doorway. You watched as he nervously scrambled taking off his headset and covering his webcam with his hands as quickly as possible, his going wide. “What are you doing, go put on some clothes.” He yelled, whispering.
“I asked you to keep it down…why are you being so loud today?” You said moving your arms around before bringing them to settle on to your hips again.
Wonwoo swallowed and looked down at his computer monitor, you could hear the gunshots from the game and Seungcheol calling out for Wonwoo telling him he needed back up. “Sorry, sorry, sorry…but you can’t just barge in here lookin’ like that.” He stared at you, his bottom lip slowly making its way in between his teeth as he looked over you slowly.
“Why not, they can’t see me.” You challenged stepping into the room. Wonwoo walked back tripping over his gaming chair as he tried to keep his hands on the webcam. “Well now they can’t, I’m covering it.” He retorted, his body at an awkward angle as you stood right in front of the monitor. “Maybe it’s a good thing they see, it’ll teach you to listen to me when I tell you things.” You said putting your hand over his hand feeling his hold on the webcam tighten. “Bet Seungcheol will listen to me if I was standing in front of him like this.” You whispered giving him a sultry look before running out of the room giggling.
You stood outside the hallway with your back against the wall as you listened to Wonwoo frantically try to cut his stream short. “Umm…s-sorry guys something came up, I’ll be back next week.”
“Wonwoo you pussy don’t leave me al—” You heard Seungcheol yell through the mic, getting cut off when Wonwoo shut everything down. You heard the sound of his headset gently hit his keyboard. You leaned over peaking your head in as you watched Wonwoo angrily run his fingers through his hair before looking over at you. “You little minx…get in here.” He demanded as he started walking towards you. You giggled and started running away into your bedroom, while he followed.
You threw yourself on your bed and waited for Wonwoo. “Hi Woo, what’s wrong?” You asked laying down the minute he walked into the room.
“Don’t you have a thesis to finish…what are you getting me so worked up for?” He said bringing his t-shirt over his head and throwing it somewhere in the room.
“I don’t think that was me, baby, that was your stupid games’ doing.” You sat up \on your elbows watching as he continued to undress.
“Do you know how dangerous that was…I could’ve been reported for nudity if you were caught.” He said as he finished taking off his boxers and climbed onto the bed.
“It’s a good thing you weren’t.” You giggled, Wonwoo rolled his eyes and turned you over so you were now laying on your stomach. You felt his palm come down onto your ass causing you to moan out. He leaned down and bit one of your cheeks, a small inaudible gasp leaving your mouth making him smirk against your skin. “If you wanted to play all you had to do was ask love.” He spoke against your skin and slowly kissed his way up your body, reaching over to move your drying hair away from your neck.
“You only ever want to play your games.” You moaned out as you felt him suck onto your neck harshly, feeling another slap land on your ass. “That’s not true…this will always be my favorite game.” He bit your earlobe sneaking a hand around your front resting his hand over your neck. “What do you say baby…want to play?” He tightened his hold around your neck making you gasp.
“mhm, yes please.” You moaned feeling his free hand teasingly run down his back, his knees parting your legs. “Always so respectful for me aren’t you.” He said sneaking his hand in between your legs. “And wet.” He moaned, coating his fingers with your arousal, teasing you slowly.
“Now tell me, love, was this what you wanted when you rudely interrupted me?” Wonwoo removed his hand from around your neck and tugged at your hips bringing you up to your knees.
“N-No.” You whimpered, feeling the head of his cock run through your folds. “I find that hard to believe. You’re all clean and moisturized and wet for me, baby.” He groaned and pressed his head onto your clit. “Just look at how hard you have me.” He finished pushing himself in slowly. You arched your back moaning, feeling yourself stretch around him.
For months your busy schedules had been getting in the way. He has his job at Woozi’s record company and his twitch streams two times a week. And you with your part-time job at the publishing company and going to night classes to finish up your masters, that by the time any of you would get home all you wanted to do was sleep.
“Woo, it’s been too long please move.” You choked out feeling his veins throbbing against your silky walls. “Anything for you my angel.” He grunted snapping his hips into you hard making you scream out his name. Feeling your arms start to give out as the pleasure continued to course through your body, you leaned down on your forearms.
His hips hitting your backside hard yet slowly as he sensually rode out the pleasure the two of you were currently feeling. His cock throbbing the more the two of you started reaching for your high. “I-I’ve missed you.” He moaned breathlessly leaning his body over yours digging his fingers into your hips roughly. He buried his head into the crook of your neck as he continued to ram himself into you. You turned your head to the side and kissed him messily biting his lower lip roughly. “I missed you too.” You gasped feeling him hit the sweet spot you knew he loved to play with.
Both of your moans mix with the sound of your skin against his, bounced of your bedroom walls. The headboard of the bed slamming into the wall creating small dents that you were sure you would worry about in the morning. Along with the noise complaint letters you would get during the week from all the angry tenants living in your apartment building. But you could care less, the only thing that mattered was the delicious spread going on in between your legs.
“Touch yourself b-baby,” Wonwoo demanded, feeling the loss of his skin against your back as he lifted up his body. You snaked your hand between your legs and rubbed your clit roughly, as Wonwoo sped up his movements. He set a foot on your bed reaching a new angle in you making you arch your back in pleasure as he helped you chase your high. The coil of pleasure spirals until you burst around him screaming out his name in pleasure. You panted bottoming out looking up over your shoulder whimpering as Wonwoo pulled out of you, releasing his load onto your back milking himself out.
He gave your ass a little tap signaling for you to lay down on your stomach again. He panted laying down next to you putting an arm underneath his head and the other on your upper back. “So much for finishing my thesis tonight.” You said trying to catch your breath.
Wonwoo laughed, shaking his head, drawing small patterns on your shoulders with his thumb. “That’s on you baby.” He leaned over kissing your nose. “Are you feeling better?”
You looked up at him raising an eyebrow. “What do you mean Woo, I’m not sick.”
He sighed, turning his body to face you. “No, but you were stressed out, I could tell the second I came home and when you told me to keep it down the first time.” He brought his hand up over and rubbed soothing circles around your flushed-out cheek. You nodded burying your face into his chest. “I’m feeling a lot better…thank you.”
“Good, now let me run you a bath and then we can sit down together and finish your thesis…does that sound okay?” He scrunched up his nose at a poor attempt to push his glasses up. You smiled helping him and kissed his lips softly.
“Sounds amazing love.”
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keykid-database · 2 years ago
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Day three of @khoc-week
So the prompts for today I definitely had to play fast and loose with because these are KHuX ocs, and when dealing with khux, that's a whole mess that I also have plans for, and I've already technically written about/set in motion for Tagen specifically (I’ll get to Lief soon hopefully). So I decided I would just write a little more about what happened to start the collapse of the party, and also towards the end of it, which was technically already written but hey! 
Enjoy!
Day 3 Aud 3rd Data: Events leading up to the party falling apart 
⇾ Story: Catalyst
“Tagen!” Lief called across the gardens, panic lacing her voice. Tagen and Everest both as their friend and party mate reached them, both confused by what was up. “We've got a problem.”
Lief stopped in front of the two barely catching her breath, her notepad in hand. Tagen felt a shard of ice creep into his heart, Lief’s words worrying him. She sounded serious, more serious than normal, and his face must have given his emotions away. 
“I was just checking numbers and doing rounds, and.. Well, look!” Lief held out her pad scrapped with a few pages of panicked writing. Tagen only parsed a few words of it, before gently putting a hand on Lief’s shoulder. 
“Just tell me.”
Lief blinked, a hint of frustration crossing her face, but only let out a puff of breath. “At least three of our members haven't been.. active as of late.”
“Are they okay?” Everest piped up. While he himself wasn't one of the party leaders, he still cared. He was also friends with a decent amount of the party. 
“Yeah, I don’t think its.. Its not just their numbers.” Lief nervously scanned her notes. 
“Well, we’ve never really been that insistent on numbers, it just wasn't our way.” Tagen said in response, not understanding what Lief was getting at. 
“I think that might be part of the problem, Tagen.:
“What do you mean?”
“Well..” It was clear Lief was uncomfortable, but she only took a moment to gather her words. “At least one of them has put in to transfer.” 
“What?!” Tagens reaction came out sharper than he intended, but he hadn't been expecting that to be Lief’s response. At least he knew he needed to take moment, taking a breath, and shutting his mouth.
“Did they defect?” Everest dared to ask. Lief looked down at her notepad. 
“No, not as far as I can tell. They're just leaving our party.” 
“At least it's just one person. The other two probably just needed a break or something like that.” Everest gave Lief an encouraging smile, trying to look on the bright side. 
“Mmmm… that's the thing-” 
“Who is it.”
“What?”
“Who all was it?” Tagen had suddenly spoken up, startling Lief and interrupting her a little. He was less sharp with his words this time, but his expression was still pretty grim. 
“That's what- It’s David, Leon, and Moki. Those three usually stick together..”
“So the other two are as good as gone.” Tagen let out a sigh, crouching down, hanging his head, and resting his arms on his knees. “Couldn’t they have talked to us first?”
“I have this bad feeling they did, or at least tried. It has been an issue in the past.” Lief sat down on the grass next to him, looking just as defeated. 
“Couldn't we go talk to them now? Ask them…” Tagen wasn't sure what he wanted at the moment, trailing off as he spoke. He only felt a small ping of betrayal. Everest spoke up as he joined the other two on the ground. 
“It might be worth a shot, but if they have already made the decision to leave you two might be disappointed.” 
“You’re right. They may just wish to be left alone at this point.” 
Tagen couldn't believe how easily Lief was willing to just give in. He couldn't help but feel they should at least try. “But-! Only one of them is for sure leaving! If anything we should at least go and talk to the other two!” Tagen got to his feet. “I’m going to! I..I mean, worst case it's only three people right?” Tagen hoped his voice wouldn't betray just how much he was trying to convince himself of the last part as he said it. 
“Yknow what? You’re right, we should try to part on good terms at the very least.” Lief agreed though Tagen felt she had missed the point of what he had meant. He wasn't going to argue, he was just glad for the support, and didn't want to bring the mood down again. 
“Tha’ts the spirit!” Everest smiled at them, standing up, and helping Lief up as well. She nodded her thanks. 
“We should probably get on it after missions. We need to get to our own mission for the day anyway.” Lief turned a few pages in her notepad to look over the details. “The day is dragging on.” 
“Yeah after missions, that sounds like a plan.” 
✦✦✦✦
⇾ Story: Fracture Link on Ao3  (Click to read the rest of the ongoing fic! This is technically part 4!)
Rating: Teen And Up 
Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply
Category: Gen
Summary: Parties are an essential part of a keyblade wielder's life. However not every party has the same staying power as others. And when a party member leaves, it can be a stressful thing for everyone involved.
Off to the side of the fountain square under a useless street lamp, Tagen paced back and forth in front of his party members. Around them, friendly chatter filled the air, mixing well with the sound of the fountain itself. Groups of other keyblade wielders gathered together, greeting each other as the day slowly got started. Some huddled around the bulletin boards to look at missions, or events, others hanging out waiting for their friends, and simply chatting to pass the time. No one seemed to pay much mind to the tension that flitted in the air between the small group as they watched Tagen grip his hat tighter in his hands.
"You've been doing this same routine everyday for the past month Tagen. Calm down." A boy in a star cover coat spoke up, letting out a sigh as he leaned against the lamp post.
"Yeah, Everest is right." Another spoke up, and they stepped out of Tagen's path. "At this rate how do you have any energy left for missions? You spend most of it pacing. I mean what's got you in a huff now anyway?" Tagen paused midstep, ready to let all his built up frustration flow. However, he was cut off by their other friend, her hand gently resting on his shoulder.  
"He's probably just anxious because Dante and Taffy aren't here yet, Kiti. Leave him alone." Tagen nodded, confirming the statement. Tagen closed his eyes, letting out a quick sigh of "Thanks Lief." And taking a moment to calm down. However, it didn't last long. When he looked back up, Kiti's eyes were wide, making anxiety stab right back into his chest.
"Oh, you guys didn't.. hear?" Kiti asked, after a moment of hesitation. One of their hands reached to nervously play with the back of their pixie cut.
"Hear what?" Tagen asked, voice slightly wavering. Everest stood up from where he was leaning, reaching out to weave his fingers reassuringly with Tagen's. Kiti busied themselves with brushing invisible dirt off their pink striped pants. Tagen clenched his free hand, and pulled away from Everest. He wasn't finding comfort in the gesture at the moment, or at Kiti's clear avoidance of his question. Lief only took a step toward Kiti, giving them a gentle smile, trying to ease the situation. Kiti didn't look up,  not wanting to meet any of the others in the eye.
"Well?" Tagen asked again, his harsh tone covering up the warble in his voice. Lief flashed him a glare, as Kiti pinched the bridge of their nose.
"Why do I have to be the bearer of bad news! Taffy and Dante aren't coming." They said, letting out an exasperated huff. Lief and Everest looked at them with shocked expressions, as Tagen only hung his head, anger silencing his voice.
"Why not?" Lief was the first to speak.
"You know why. The two of them went and joined a new party together." Kiti said slumping back against the street lamp, looking dejected.
"... At least the two of them are together...." Everest said, as if trying to find a bright side to the situation. Kiti only looked up, a defeated look in their eyes. Tagen suddenly stomped his foot on the ground, startling his friends.
"There has to be some way we can fix this." He said, choking back the waver in his tone. "We built a party in the first place. Can't we do it again?"
The other three looked at each other with uncertainty.
"I'm not sure that's how it works, Tagen.." Lief spoke up, reaching out for him. He took a step back, willing the tears he could feel pricking his eyes not to be visible.
"Why not then?" Tagen asked. “There has got to be plenty of new wielders out there looking for a party."
"Are we even a party anymore?" Kiti countered "We're more like just a group of friends with delusions of being a party still. Really we should just go to moogle and get stickers again."
Before anymore could be said, Tagen had closed the distance between Kiti and himself, reaching out and hauling them up but the straps of their tank top.
"How dare you say that! Of course we're still a party! We worked hard for these badges, and we deserve to keep them! It's the ones who left us who don't deserve them anymore!" Tagen spat, anger boiling over. Kiti stood there in shock, but only for a moment.
"They don't deserve those anymore? They helped to earn that badge Tagen!" They quickly grabbed Tagen's lapels in return, spitting out their response.  "You wouldn't have that badge you're so proud of if it wasn't for them! The only thing you're doing by holding onto it is lying to yourself!" Kiti lifted Tagen onto his toes for just a moment to make their point, before letting him drop back down into his feet. However, when Kiti went to pull back Tagen kept on hand firmly gripped on their top, eyes full of fire.
"Well, at least I haven't given up on trying to rebuild our party before we've even tried, unlike you. There are always wielders looking to switch partie-" Kiti grabbed Tagen's wrist, twisting it upwards.
"And do to other parties what happened to us?! That's exactly how we ended up here! And you're willing to do it right back?"
"I'm at least willing to try something! You're just too upset because your so-called best friends left you behind!" Within a moment Kiti yanked Tagen forward, landing a swift blow on his jaw, before kicking him to the ground.
"EVER CONSIDER THAT MAYBE EVERYONE LEFT BECAUSE OF YOU?!"
Tagen was already on his feet, ready to retaliate, hot fury burning in his veins. His heart shaped glasses barely still sitting on his face.
"Enough! " With a flash of light, Everest was firmly holding his keyblade out in front of him. Lief quickly grabbed Tagen's arm pulling him back.
"Stop it! Both of you! There was no need for any of that!" She said, looking between the two of them. While her expression was angry, Tagen could see the heartbreak clear in her eyes. Guilt started to wash over him. "Everyone who left did so of their own accord, you know that Kiti. It had nothing to do with anyone's leadership." Kiti only looked to the side, begrudgingly nodding.
"And Tagen." Life's grip tightened on his arm, making him wince slightly. "Kiti is missing their friends, just like you have been for the last month. So of course they are upset. You have no right to rub that in their face." Lief let go after that, leaving Tagen to rub at his arm and jaw.
He watched as Everest slowly lowered his keyblade, hesitating, in case either Tagen or Kiti decided to become physical again. The two met eyes for just a moment, Kiti still glaring at Tagen, who quickly turned to collect his hat off the ground.
"... Sorry Kiti... I-"
"Yeah whatever. Let's just go choose a mission or something." Kiti cut Tagen off, already starting to make their way over towards the mission boards.
Tagen gripped his hat tightly once again, before fixing it atop his head, and adjusting his glasses. Lief flashed him a reassuring smile, before following suit of their party members, Everest having already met up with Kiti. The tension Tagen had been carrying settled in his stomach as a knot of anxiety. He shrugged it off, electing to ignore it. This would all be forgotten in a few days, right?
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lia-bones · 4 years ago
Text
A thousand splinters of glass (Part 2)
Broken hearts.
Sirius Balck x Reader
Summary: After the argument, they are both in their room and are comforted by their friends. There comes a question. Can everything be alright again or is it all over and broken?
Warnings: angst, arguments, swear words, insults, broken heart, hint of alcohol consumption, tears.
(As always, misspellings, grammatical errors, translation errors.)
Words: 2743
Author's note: I'm sorry that the second part is so late. I wanted to have it written and uploaded earlier, but I broke part of my right hand at work, which made writing very difficult for me. But I did my best. Next week comes part three, which will probably be the last part.
I hope you enjoy reading 🌻
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I made the GIF myself
* * *
After an hour (Y/N) noticed someone trying to open the door. She pressed her back tighter against the door, to prevent the person from entering. "Go the fuck away!" she shouted in a broken voice.
The push on the door stopped and something was moving behind it. "(Y/N)? What happened? Please let me in. Let me help you." she heard Lily's soft voice through the wood of. She didn't really want to see anyone at the moment. But Lily's presence and reassuring words had often helped her before. So she moved forward and whispered just loud enough "Lily. I need a big hug and some tea."
Lily slowly pushed open the door from the outside and stuck her head through the crack. She immediately saw (Y/N), still crouching on the floor, with bloodshot eyes, tear marks on her cheeks and red spots on her face. With quick steps she was with her friend and pulled her tightly into her arms.
(Y/N) buried her face in the crook of Lily's neck and sighed. Her friends stroked her hair and whispered soothing words as she hugged her tighter.
She let (Y/N) cry a little more before she took her by the shoulders to push her away from her a little and look into her face.
"Remus said they heard you yelling at each other, but they couldn't understand what it was about. What happened between you and Sirius?" Lily asked softly and gave her the Handkerchief from her pocket.
(Y/N) wiped it over her cheeks and eyes and smiled weakly at her friend.
"He accused me of cheating on him. With Remus. He yelled at me and called me slut."
she told what had happened, briefly closed her eyes and added ,"He threw a glass at me."
Lily's eyes widened in shock and she put a hand over her mouth.
(Y/N) bit her lip and turned her head to the side as tears came to her eyes again.
"But ... how does he come up with it. What does he think of throwing a glass at you? Did he even let you explain? That stupid ass." Lily asked angrily, shaking her head in disbelief.
(Y/N) shrugged and sniffed up.
"I don't know, I wanted to explain to him. Remus and I are just friends. But he continued to insult me ​​and then the glass flew." she explained to her friend and lay down on the floor to look at the ceiling.
Lily stretched out next to her but turned her head to her friend and said :" The boy is so stubborn and stuck in his mind. I know you and Remus are just friends, we all know that. Sirius must have forgotten that. Which doesn't give him the right to insult you and judge you with a glass. Did it hit you? Are you hurt?"
(Y/N) took a deep breath and turned her head to her friend as well. "No it doesn't. Physical, no. Emotionally, totally."
Lily nodded in relief.
The room fell silent while the two girls stared at the ceiling. Both followed their own thoughts. How could everything have changed so quickly for (Y/N). Everything had been fine until two hours ago. Or at least that's what she thought. It doesn't seem like that for Sirius. She thought the two could trust each other enough to talk to each other. Without yelling. She had tried very hard to remain calm. But how should that work when you are yelled at and insulted. Sirius was never known to stay calm and think before speaking. She knew that. Yes, she knew that before she got together with him. It was also a reason why she liked him so much. He just said what he thought and didn't hold back.
But today. That was too much.
She was aware that it was difficult to gain his trust due to his difficult family situation. But she thought he would trust her. They had known each other for more than six years, one of which they were together. Of course, they would have argued a few times before. But never like that, they yelled at each other over trivialities until both of them had vented all their anger and after that they had made up and everything was fine again.
Not this time. For (Y/N) it feels like it will never be fine again.
He had overreacted, yelled at her, insulted and thrown off. It's never been this extreme.
He had no reason. She acted with Remus as she did with Lily, because they were both her best friends. He did the same with his friends. And he flirted with other girls. But she was never really jealous. Maybe now and then, but only when the flirting got too much, but then he always told her that they mean nothing to him, that everything was just fun and that she was the only one for him. (Y/N) believed him, he had never given her a reason not to.
Just like she never gave him a reason not to believe her. But apparently he doesn't.
After a while, Lily broke the silence again. She looked at her friend again and asked carefully: "Are you tow still together?"
(Y/N) didn't answer right away. She wasn't exactly sure herself.
Nobody had said a word about it. But for
her, was the glass, hit next to her head like a picture-perfect backup.
"I do not know exactly. It feels like the end to me." she whispered into the darkness.
* * *
Sirius was sitting on the edge of his bed. The elbows on the legs and the head buried in the hands. Frustrated, he pulled his hair and shuffled in denial.
The remnants of the argument still in the room. The broken glass, the sticky stain on the floor and the bad feeling that was eating into his bones.
He didn't want that to happen. He didn't want to yell at her, he didn't want to offend her and of course he didn't want to throw the glass at her either. Had he not been drinking he would have hit her right in the face.
He wanted to talk to her normally, calmly tell her what he was worried about. The way she did when something about his behavior worried her. But he hadn't made it. Something had blown inside him and he had started yelling at her. He was such a fool.
Sirius wiped his wet eyes as the door opened and his three friends walked in. They looked at him and immediately noticed that something was wrong with their friend.
He looked broken and totally desperate.
"Hey pets, what happened Is everything okay?" James asked and sat down on the bed next to his friends. Remus leaned against the bedpost across from Sirius bed and Peter sat on the floor between the two beds. Waiting, they looked at Sirius who shrugged his shoulders uncomfortably and grimaced.
"The two argued. "That wasn't a question but a statement from Remus.
Sirius nodded and looked at his friends for the first time. His hair stood out and his face was pale and red at the same time.
He snuggled before he explained in a hoarse voice: "I screamed at her and insulted her. I didn't listen to her or let her finish."
James beside him raised a raised eyebrow and looked questioningly at his best friend. But when he didn't tell any more he asked: "And? You've yelled at each other before. This is nothing new. Before that, everything always turned out fine. Give her a little time that will subside."
Sirius just shook his head.
"No. Nothing's going to be fine. I screwed up. She'll never forgive me for that." he tried to swallow the lump in his throat and blink away the tears that came up again. In vain.
"Why did you fight? " asked Peter, scratching his neck, slightly overwhelmed. He had never seen Sirius like that before and didn't know what to do. Otherwise Sirius was always cool and relaxed and hid his negative feelings as best he could.
"I accused her of cheating on me." Sirius admitted stupidly and did not dare to look his friends in the face.
"Bullshit. She would never ..." Remus started but was stopped by him again.
"With Remus."
The room fell silent again. The boys exchanged incredulous looks and hoped they had just heard wrong.
He couldn't really mean that.
"You bloody Idiot. How did you get the fucking idea your girlfriend was cheating on you. With one of your best friends. She never gave you a fucking reason not to trust her. " Remus explained and looked at his friends in disappointment. The young werewolf just couldn't believe that Sirius really believed
(Y/N) was cheating on him with one of his best friends. He and her would never do that. And Sirius should know that too.
"How did you come up with such a stupid idea?"
Sirius got up from the bed vigorously and stood in front of his taller friend.
He huffed and at him with furrowed eyebrows.
"I see how you treat each other. Giggling together, touching each other, the insider jokes, whispering, meet alone. It is obviously coming." he grumbled, looking like a kicked puppy. Remus took a deep breath and ran a hand over his face. So that was the reason he thought that.
"Look Sirius. You're exaggerating a bit. (Y/N) and I are just friends. Good friends. Friends laugh together. She and I have the same subjects so we study togethern. You and James touch each other more often than she and I and still she doesn't think you're cheating on her with him. And we don't have any inside jokes either. Anyone who read the book would have understood that. It's all just in your head. She is her own person. You can't think she's cheating on you just because she gets on well with someone."
Sirius looks at him with wide eyes and open mouth, startled. Remus was right. As so often. (Y/N) would never cheat on him and Remus would never do anything with a friend's girlfriend. Him and her were just friends. In fact, it was a good thing that his girlfriend got on well with his best friends.
She has always been open and close with her friends. He just saw things that weren't there. He was afraid of losing her. That she would reject him and despise him just like his blood relativ family. He was afraid of losing people from his chosen family.
Well, that was exactly what he had now taken care of himself. He hadn't trusted his own girlfriend and had beaten her down. His Girlfriend. He didn't even know if she was still his girlfriend at all. She hadn't said anything but he could well imagine that he had ruined everything with his action.
But he couldn't let that happen. He couldn't lose a member of his family. He had to talk to her, explain everything and at least try to prevent her from leaving him by all means.
Above all, he had to apologize deeply.
"I fuck up. I really fuck up. I ... I really screwed up. I threw a fucking gals at her." he stammered, buried his hands in his hair and fell back on the bed.
His three friends looked at him in shock.
"You did what?" James asked incredulous and discovered the broken glass and the stain next to the door.
Sirius had buried his head in his hands again and mumbled muffled: "You already understand me."
Nobody really knew what to say now.
Nobody expected that. Sirius wasn't aggressive. He would never hurt an innocent one. So it was really breathtaking for everyone.
"Fuck. Did you ... did you ... hit her?" asked Peter, chewing the inside of his cheek. The other two were also eager to hear Sirius' answer to this question.
"NO! NO! No no no. I haven't. Fortunately not. It's smashed against the wall next to her head." Sirius shuffled and continued to slump. For him it was as if more and more weights were being put on him. As if he was only now that he was really realizing what had happened.
"You have to help me. Please. Please help me. You have to help me so that she will forgive me. I can't lose her. I just can't. I love her." Sirius begged and looked pleadingly at his friends one by one. With a look that could break hearts, a little like he's going mad.
Both of them never really said that they loved each other. Everyone knew it somehow without anyone ever saying it. But now that he had said the three words they meant even more.
"That could be difficult." Peter muttered and turned his head away to stop seeing his friends broken like this.
Sirius' response to that was a desperate deep shuffle.
"Yeh. Peter is right. That could be difficult. Not only could it be, it will be difficult. But we will help you. You two belong together." James agreed and put a hand on his desperate friend's shoulder.
"Or? We'll help him?" the boy with glasses asked his other friends and looked at them promptly.
Peter shifted back and forth a little before he nodded and said: " Yes, yes naturally"
Now all eyes turned to Remus. He covered his face with both hands and let out a deep breath. He was friends with both of them. He didn't want to stand between the two fronts and have to choose one side. He remembered the conversation he had with (Y/N) earlier while studying. She had said Sirius would be good for her. And she was definitely good for Sirius. Since the two were together, both were happier, more exuberant. He just wanted his friends to be happie. And if that required him to stand on one side, then he would.
So he dropped his arms in resignation and nodded. "We'll help you. But you have to work really hard. And you have to improve yourself, trust her more, stop flirting with others. She would never tell you but it bothers her more than she admits. If something like this happens again, I'll just let you drown in your grief."
Sirius gave his friends a pained, weak smile, wiped his eyes with a sleeve and uttered a harsh, "thx."
The boys planned until late at night what they would do so that (Y/N) would forgive Sirius or at least talk to him. It was early in the morning before the four of them went to bed.
Silence enveloped the room. Three of the residents were asleep, only Sirius was still awake. With the silence his thoughts came back that (Y/N) would never forgive him and would leave him. And with the thoughts, the tears and the shuffling, came back as well. He closed the curtains and put a silence spell over his bed, as not to disturb his friends and buried his face in his pillow. Sleep was out of the question for him.
* * *
The girls' dormitory had already returned quietly. (Y/N) had cried herself to sleep hours ago after a few cups of tea and supportive words from her best friend.
She was lying next to Lily in her bed, wrapped in her blanket. Lily had refused to leave her alone, she just lay down in bed with her and stroked her arm until they both fell asleep. (Y/N) was grateful for that. She could be happy to have friends like that.
Tonight she had allowed herself to show weakness. Allowed to show how Sirius' behavior had hurt her. But tomorrow, she swore to herself, she would build the walls around herself as high as never before and not let it penetrate how sad and injured she actually was. She would play the strong one. Even if she actually felt infinitely weak. She wouldn't let him see how his behavior affected her.
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daddyjackfrost · 4 years ago
Note
i'm not sure if i have anyy suggestions that you'll want to write, but i'll send them in as they come to mind
so excited for your writing ^^ no pressure though, best of luck with your studies!!
y/n is studying (something difficult, maybe pre-med or med school?) and is feeling a little drained and self-doubtful. she gets up from her space to take a second and is reminded of a time she spent with <whichever haikyuu boy you'd like to write about>. they hadn't gotten to spend much time together as a result of their busy schedule, so the memory of this weekend is especially special to her. start flashback of fluff they had met for dinner, spent time together, cuddled and slept (not 18+) together. they both woke up early but opted to stay in bed together, content in eachother's company, making small talk, laughing softly, fluffy stuff. y/n had brought up her struggles to <haikyuu boy of choice> and he'd been there for her to confide in. she knows its her dream, but casually wonders if she isnt cut out for it. he actively listens, offering comforting touches, until she's finished and then helps her talk it out until she's back up in confidence. more fluffy morning end lashback of fluff y/n feels better having remembered <hq boy>'s pep talk and resumes her efforts.
yeesh, idk how long/short/detailed/vague suggestions are supposed to be, so sorry! 😅 i'll try to be more vague, if you'd like, in the future
hi!! omg u r SO cute i’m in love. anyways, i love your suggestion! it’s amazing. and don’t worry, the more detail the better!
for this request, i’ve chosen Daichi. because i’m a daichi whore i believe in daichi supremacy
Warnings: none :) fluff, daichi x f!reader
alright, anyways, enjoy!
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You stared at the piles of paper on your bed. You couldn’t even begin to recall what the different colours of the paper meant. You were just glad you had written it down on your phone.
“This is ridiculous,” you whispered to yourself.
Your back was aching, your muscles were sore, and your eyes burned from the constant strain. You had a final coming up and it was killing you in more ways then one.
“Is this even worth it? I mean, really, what are the chances of me getting into med school?”
You groaned and fell back on your pillow. You dragged your hands down your face. You had been spiraling down a tunnel of self-doubt and it was affecting you. You had begun talking to yourself even more than usual, especially since you cut contact from everyone for a couple of days.
Your phone chimed beside you and you turned your head to face it. You had promised yourself to turn it off, except you forgot.
Well, you didn’t forget, you just didn’t want too.
You picked it up and your eyes fell on the message that your boyfriend left you.
From: acab but not him🙄❣️
‘good evening, beautiful. make sure to eat something, yeah? and get some fresh air. you’ve got this babe, i believe in you❣️’
You smiled at the message. Unknowingly, a few small tears formed at the corners of your eyes. Daichi had a week long training camp that coincidentally aligned with your final. Now, Daichi was in Tokyo and you were cooped up in your room. 
Daichi had made it his job to send you texts almost every hour to remind you he loved you and to eat. You didn’t think you could love him even more.
Due to his own busy schedule, Daichi and you hadn’t been able to spend too much time together before he left. But you knew that as soon as you had taken the final, you were going to spent three days in his arms.
You sent a quick text back, telling him you loved him and that you were going to get something to eat now.
You slowly slid out of bed, making your bed and your bones make noise out of agony. Your knees cracked and you looked down. “Just break,” you prayed.
When nothing happened, you huffed out an annoyed breath and made your way to your kitchen. You and Daichi had moved into an apartment two years ago, and you loved every part of it. Your home was your baby.
As you walked, your eyes fell upon the black leather jacket that laid jumbled up on the couch. Your thoughts immediately flashed to the weekend, the last time you had seen Daichi.
It was Friday night, which meant date night for you and the police officer, and it was perfect.
You parked your car outside of the Miyagi Police Station, waiting for Daichi.
You stood outside, enjoying the light breeze. Daichi had texted you to give him a couple minutes. Today was Friday, which meant date night for you and your lover.
You heard some ruckus and lifted your head, meeting Daichi’s warm gaze. He had a large grin etched onto his face and you felt your own lips pull into a smile.
Daichi walked up to you and pressed a quick kiss to your forehead. “Hello, darling.”
You brushed away the few dark locks that fell on his forehead. “Hello, officer.”
Daichi’s eyes slightly narrows at the use of the word. He absolutely loved and hated when you called him officer. It did things to him.
“Come, let’s go. I’m starving.”
You nodded and pulled away from him, walking to the drivers seat. Daichi always insisted you drive when you picked him up because he wanted to ‘get his full of you’ because he was at work. You never truly understood it, but you liked his heated stare on you so you never said anything.
You and Daichi ended up going to your favourite restaurant. You went here a lot, and were now on first name basis with the manager and half of the employees.
You and Daichi both ordered your regulars and ate peacefully, with some small talk here and there. A hungry Daichi usually resulted in a quiet Daichi.
After dinner, you drove to the park by your house to get some fresh air and to work off some of the food you just ate.
Late night walks with Daichi were your favourite little activities you did with him. Daichi loved late night walks with you too. He loved watching the moon glow on your skin as you stared adoringly at the stars.
Daichi held your hand in his, gently swinging them. He wore black jeans and his favourite grey shirt, with his black worn out leather jacket you had gotten him a couple of years ago.
You kept your eyes on him. His skin glistened in the moonlight and you found him as beautiful as the stars that twinkled above him, if not more.
“What’re you thinkin’ bout, love?”
You turned your head, finding it completely unfair that someone so beautiful stood next to you.
“You,” you mumbled truthfully.
“Is that so?” Daichi’s voice came out teasingly.
You let go of his hand and skipped forward until you stood a couple of feet away from him. You pointed at him and he stopped, hands in his pockets and a smile on his face.
“You, Sawa, are the love of my life.”
Daichi’s eyes widened slightly and a flush of pink now rested on his face. Daichi cleared his throat but couldn’t help the grin that had replaced his smile.
“And you’re mine.”
You grinned at him and then continued to walk until you reached the hill that overlooked your neighborhood. You crouched down, and then sat down, pulling your knees to your chest.
Daichi soon followed, except he sat behind you, and spread his legs so you were sitting between them. He pulled you close to your chest, until your back rested completely against his chest.
You tilted your head back, resting it on Daichi’s shoulder. One of Daichi’s large, warm, hands laid on your stomach, rubbing softly. The other was playing with your hair.
This is it, you thought. I’ll never love anyone the way I love him.
You looked up at the stars. You had always had a fascination with the balls of of heat and energy. When you were a child, your dream was to become a star. You’re not quite sure when that dream led you on the path of medicine, but it did.
Daichi stared at you. It didn’t matter that you two had been together for almost six years, Daichi could never get over how beautiful you were.
The way your hair glistened in the moonlight, the way your eyes twinkled, as if you held the stars in them yourselves. Daichi stared at you the way you stared at the stars.
With complete and utter adoration.
Daichi’s eyes landed on your hands. He watched as they slight shook, and how your tried to make them stop.
He frowned. Your hands only shook when your were stressed.
As swiftly as he could, Daichi grabbed your shaking hands and held them together, complete engulfing them in his own.
“You’re shaking, love. What’s the matter?”
You froze. Caught.
Even though you should have been calm, happy even, since you sat under the stars with your lover, the final that loomed over your shoulder had your nervous system in shambles.
Daichi’s thumbs rubbed the backs of your hands as he waited for your response.
“I’m just nervous,” you mumbled. You hated speaking about up-coming tests or finals. You always had really bad anxiety when it came to any form of testing, and Daichi knew that.
He knew everything about you.
“What about?”
You sighed and extended your legs. Daichi had a way with words. Even when he didn’t speak much, his presence and silence alone spoke tenfold.
“Nothing, really,” you let out an awkward laugh. “You know I’m always a little bit nervous.”
Daichi wanted to press on the matter. He wanted you to speak to him, he wanted to be able to share your stress. But he also knew that you would talk to him when you were ready.
Daichi pressed a soft kiss on your neck. “Talk to me when you’re ready, love.”
You nodded. “I will.”
Daichi kissed the small space behind your earlobe. “Let’s go home, yeah?” You nodded, agreeing. Daichi stood up and then put out his hand for you. You grabbed it, and let him pull you up with ease.
You two began the journey home, reaching in a couple of minutes.
You and Daichi changed into your nightwear. You were wearing one of Daichi’s shirts, and he was just wearing grey sweatpants.
You couldn’t keep your eyes off his body, but managed to look away before he caught you.
Daichi slipped under the covers, and then lifted them. He patted his chest. “Come lay on me.”
You immediately obliged, jumping onto his chest, causing Daichi to let out a small grunt.
You let all your wait drop on Daichi’s body. Your head was in the crook of his neck, and your chest lay flat against his. You could feel his heartbeat against yours and it took you a moment to realize that both your hearts beat at the same time.
As one.
Daichi slid his left hand under your—his—shirt, rubbing your back. It was these moments he wanted to truly cherished. He knew you were stressed about the final that was coming up. He had put the date in his phone when you mentioned it.
Daichi realized that today had been the quietest days you two had had. But he didn’t mind. He loved everyday with you. The quiet, the loud, the hectic, and the crazy.
Daichi began to hum. He could feel the knots in your back, and he knew you should have a nice relaxing weekend before you began to study.
Before he knew it, Daichi heard your soft snores fill the air.
A wide smile broke out on his face. Daichi absolutely adored your sleeping face. All your worry lines disappeared and you looked the most at peace when you slept in his arms.
Daichi slightly pushed himself up. He wanted to be able to see your properly. His brown eyes softened at the sight of your hand against chest. You often called him a creep for staring at your sleeping face, but he always just shrugged it off.
After some time, Daichi found himself driting off to sleep, but not before he tightened his hold on you and kissed your forehead. “Sleep well, my love.”
Hours later, your eyes fluttered open, but you immediately cringed and shut them again.
The sun was facing directly at you. You had forgotten to close your blinds.
You tried to adjust your posture, but immediately stopped when you heard a low rumble from Daichi. No, you felt it, and you froze at the vibrations.
“Don’t move, love.”
Daichi’s voice was low and husky, and slightly dry. You lifted your head and found yourself still laying on his chest. Daichi’s arms were securely wrapped around you, his eyes were shut.
The sound of his morning voice hit you right in the stomach and you couldn’t help but brush your fingers against his cheekbones.
Daichi’s eyes shot open. His dark brown eyes met yours, and for a moment, everything stopped.
You looked so beautiful, Daichi thought.
“Good morning,” you whispered.
Daichi smiled at you and let his head drop back on the pillow. “It is a very good morning, indeed.”
You used your hands and slightly pushed yourself up, so you were now straddling Daichi’s waist. His eyes opened and landed on your nervous smile.
“What’s wrong?”
Daichi grabbed your hips and pushed himself up, so his back was against the headboard.
You now sat on his thighs, and his hold on you tightened a little bit.
You stared at the man in front of you. Even after having you sleep on him for hours, he still looked perfect. It pissed you off, especially since you knew you probably had some drool on your chin.
Daichi leaned forward and pressed a small kiss to your forehead. “Talk to me.”
You nodded and began to play with your fingers.
You couldn’t help but think of the final you had to take in a couple of days. It didn’t make sense, you thought. You had taken finals and tests before, but for some reason, the one you had in five days had disrupted your sleep and taken over your life.
“I’m so nervous for the final, Sawa. I feel like there’s a knot in my stomach and it keeps tightening. I can’t breathe.”
Daichi began to rub the skin above your hip with his fingers. He listened attentively. He was gonna let you talk first, getting everything off your chest.
“I know I always complain and then end up doing well, but what if this is the one I flunk? What if this is the one I end up failing? It’s so nerve wracking. I don’t even know if I wanna do this anymore.”
Daichi’s hands slipped under your shirt and he slowly began to massage your back and shoulder muscles. He wanted to offer you physical comfort.
He knew you were often a mess of nerves and anxiety a week before any test, and no matter how many times he assured you that you would do fine, you always ended up getting caught up in your head.
“I know it’s my dream. But at this point, dropping out sounds ideal. There’s enough doctors in the world, right? Maybe I should do something less nerve wracking.”
You sighed and closed your eyes. It felt nice to finally get your thoughts off your chest.
Daichi’s hands squeezed your hips in response. He hated hearing you talking yourself down. It made him feel so helpless, because for him, you were his everything. He had the upmost respect and belief in you.
“Y/n, love, from everyone in your life, you are the only one who doesn’t fully believe you can do this. I know medicine is a very hard and competitive occupation, but you know I believe in you. If anyone can power through this, it’s you.”
Tears had pooled in your eyes. Daichi had always been so good with words. You knew that Daichi had always been mature for his age, meaning his patience and abilityto comfort you was far better than anyone else’s.
His compassion and understanding was his greatest qualities. His calming aura always managed to break through all your walls. It was what made him such a good captain.
“What if I fail?”
You had mumbled your question, hoping he wouldn’t have caught it.
But he did.
Daichi leaned in and kissed your nose “You won’t. And if you do, then you fail. You shouldn’t be scared to fail, y/n. You should be scared to give up. If you fail, you can always take it again.”
You sighed and lightly nodded. Although you appreciated his words, you knew they would only comfort you for a day or two.
“Thank you, Sawa.”
You tried getting up from his lap, but Daichi had other plans. He grabbed your hips tightly and leaned in, kissing your lips.
You didn’t hesitate, you just began to kiss him back eagerly.
Daichi’s right hand slid up your back, pushing you into him.
Your lips moved together in sync, and you brought your hands to his hair, clutching the soft ends tightly.
Daichi slightly pulled away, only to gently kiss your lips again.
Before you could deepen it, he pulled away again.
“It’s not easy, y/n. But accomplishing your dream never is. You’re gonna do great, just like you always do. I believe in you, and it’s time you do as well.”
His words wrapped around your anxious thoughts and completely anguished them.
You nodded, your nose brushing his.
You closed your eyes and let your head drop on his shoulder. Daichi wrapped his arms around you again, pulling you flush against his chest.
You stayed in that position for hours.
You in Daichi’s lap, with his hands running up and down your back as he comforted you with his words of love and stories to keep your mind off everything.
You blinked a couple of times, trying to recall what exactly what exactly what you were doing.
As you recalled Daichi’s words, you let out a small breath.
He was right, you thought. You weren’t going to fail and you were going to be okay.
You grabbed the leather jacket, and slipped it on. It smelled of Daichi and it was exactly what you needed right now.
You walked into the kitchen and grabbed a packet of ramen.
As you made the noddles, you unknowingly smiled the whole time.
Thinking of Daichi had lifted your spirits and you felt better.
He loved you, and he believed in you, and for you, that was enough.
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MAN, THIS SUCKS. I HAD TO RE-WRITE IT LIKE FOUR TIMES GODDAMN.
anyways, i absolutely love and adore daichi, and this is kinda eh😬 so forgive me. I’d been swarmed w work the past week and have no creative juices left.
i will write about this handsome man again.
daddyjackfrost © 2021 | all content belongs to me, do not modify
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inkedstarlight · 4 years ago
Text
Bittersweet: Chapter Nine
Summary: Cassian and Nesta finally meet. Officially, this time. Let the romance commence. Notes: Read it here on AO3! Warnings: very brief/non-explicit mention of sexual assault Bittersweet Masterlist
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“Earth to Nesta?”
Nesta snapped from her trance to see Emerie waving a hand in front of her face.
“You’ve been cleaning the same spot for a good ten minutes,” Emerie gestured to where Nesta was scrubbing the counter with a towel. It was squeaky clean.
Nesta let go of the towel and cleared her throat. “My bad.”
Emerie pulled out the chair on the other side of the counter and sat down. It was eleven in the evening on a Monday, and they had just closed. The only other person in Rita’s was Lucien, and he was doing dishes in the back.
“You’ve been acting weird for the past two weeks,” Emerie stated blatantly. Her stare was unwavering. “And you’ve lost at least ten pounds.”
The incidence with Tomas happened two weeks ago. Nesta was doing a pretty good job of moving on with her life all things considered. She felt like shit, but she hadn’t missed a single shift at work. That had to count for something.
But she should’ve known Emerie would notice. She was like a fucking hawk, that girl. She saw everything.
When Nesta didn’t say anything, Emerie shrugged and got up from the stool. “At least try a little harder,” she said, referring to the coworkers’ challenge to get the most tips. She shot Nesta a sad look. “Thesan is beating you. Thesan.”
Nesta mustered a laugh. Thesan wasn’t great with customers, that was common knowledge. Neither Emerie nor Nesta were people persons, but they knew how to turn it on for customers. Thesan, on the other hand, didn’t make much of an effort. It wasn’t that he was intentionally rude, the guy was just quiet in nature. In fact, he was quite a sweetheart.
Which was why it was quite entertaining to watch Thesan and Helion interact. Where Thesan was an introvert, Helion was loud as hell. Not to mention it was clear that Thesan was crushing on him. But unfortunately, Helion flirted with every living, breathing thing and was thus completely oblivious. During Nesta’s first week at Rita’s, Emerie had spilled all the tea about their coworkers. Thesan was head over heels in love with Helion, Helion had never been in a monogamous relationship, and Viviane… well, Viviane had her own little love story. A complicated one at that.
His name was Kallias. They grew up together, from scheming little kids to rebellious teenagers to young adults. Best friends since they could remember.
Because Emerie grew up in the same small town as them, she knew everything. They all went to school together. She knew that Kallias had been in love with Viviane since freshman year of high school. She knew that Viviane felt the same way, but she would never admit it thanks to the hell she was put through during her childhood. Nesta didn’t know the specifics, and she never asked.
It also didn’t help that Viviane was in a relationship with someone else. They’d been together for almost two years. Emerie thought Viviane deserved better, that he wasn’t a very good person.
Anyway, Kallias visited Rita’s nearly every weekend after his shift at the fire station to grab a drink and more importantly, see Viviane.
Nesta thought it was ridiculous. She’d told Emerie as much when she’d brought Nesta up to date on their coworkers’ lives. Why wouldn’t they just admit they loved each other and get on with it already? It was pretty fucking simple; they were just making it complicated for themselves. Emerie wholeheartedly agreed and the pair then went on an hour long rant on the idiocy of romantic relationships.
And if she was being honest, Nesta didn’t care much about these people. Sure, they were respectable but they were a temporary fixture in her life. Once she secured a job in her career field, she was going to leave them all behind.
“We should get a drink sometime. Outside of work,” Emerie clarified with a look of disgust. “I’m sick of it here.”
Nesta knew that was a lie based on the relationship Emerie had with Rita and her wife. But she didn’t say that.
“Maybe,” Nesta responded distractedly, desperate to think of an excuse. It wasn’t that she didn’t like Emerie; no, Nesta liked her coworker. She just couldn’t muster the energy to go out with friends or socialize like that. “I’m pretty busy right now though.”
Emerie narrowed her eyes and scrutinized her.
“Stop analyzing me.”
“Don’t tell me what to do.”
Emerie sighed and receded. She hesitated before saying quietly, “Is… is this the part when I ask if you’re okay and we get all deep and explore a new level of our friendship?”
Nesta slowly met her friend’s gaze. They stared at one another for several moments.
Then, they burst out laughing.
-------------------------
The next morning, Nesta was brewing her third cup of coffee when Elain padded into the kitchen.
“Good morning,” Elain yawned as a greeting. She wore bunny slippers and an oversized hoodie. Elain only had one evening class on Tuesdays, so today was her only day - save for the weekend - to sleep in.
“Hey, kiddo.”
“How long have you been up?”
Nesta glanced at the clock. It was nine-thirty. She’d woken up at six after a sleepless night of tossing and turning.
But she simply shrugged instead. “Not long.”
Nesta poured the coffee into her mug, sitting back down at the counter. She watched as Elain bustled around the kitchen, scrambling eggs and slicing fruit. The morning light spilled through the dusty kitchen sink window, bars of sunshine reflecting off the tiled floors. Iroh basked in the sunspots, his black fur glistening as his chartreuse eyes blinked closed.
Elain and Nesta hadn’t spent much time together in the past couple weeks. It was Nesta’s doing, of course. She was actively avoiding her sister and everyone else. After Elain had tried to talk to Nesta after the whole thing with Tomas, she stopped asking Nesta if she was okay. Nesta assumed that Elain realized she wasn’t going to get an answer, that there wasn't really a point in trying.
But Gods, Nesta fucking missed her. And even though she wanted nothing more than to retreat to her bedroom as she sat there in the kitchen, she didn’t move from the chair.
You need them as much as they need you, her father’s voice echoed in her head.
Guilt stabbed at her chest.
“How’re classes going?” Nesta asked quietly. Elain looked at her over her shoulder with a surprised yet pleasant smile.
“Great! I’m so grateful to be at such a great college, but…” Elain bit her lip, hesitating. “My bio lab is going to be the death of me."
“You know you’re allowed to complain, right?”
Elain just gave her a smile. “Yeah, I know. It's just, considering where I was a year ago, I couldn't be happier to finally be enrolled in such a prestigious program. Even if that means the classes are brutal."
I wish I was like you. I take everything for granted.
“And have you made any friends?”
Elain had started school at Pryth U months ago and yet Nesta had no idea if she even had friends yet.
Selfish bitch.
A fond smile broke out on Elain’s face. “Yes, I have this really great group of friends: Lucien, Ressina, and Varian. It's just the four of us, but we've gotten really close.��
Nesta asked Elain more questions before excusing herself back to her room, claiming she was going to try to write today, to which Elain squealed and wished her luck.
Nesta hadn't written since their dad died. Prior to his death, she would write nearly every day. She'd been working on a novel for years. The plot had came to her in middle school, and it just grew from there. She'd never told anyone about it. Everyone knows how fucking hard it is to get your writing published, much less get high ratings. Nesta wasn't even sure if she was going to finish it. This was the longest she'd gone without writing or editing it. And she had a feeling that she wouldn't ever go back to it.
Dread filled her stomach as she thought of that prospect. What the fuck was she doing with her life?
Nesta’s phone buzzed, and she fished it out of her back pocket.
 Incoming call from Feyre Archeron.
It kept buzzing, Nesta merely stared at her sister's name on her screen. She couldn't think of a single reason why Feyre would be calling. But she pressed "Accept" before it could go to voicemail.
“Hello?”
“Hey.”
Silence.
“Uh, what’s up?” Nesta asked. She collapsed onto her unmade bed. Iroh scampered past the door and jumped on the bed with her. He didn't waste a minute curling himself around her head.
"I was calling to see… maybe, I don’t know… uh, would you want to come to dinner tonight?”
I was not expecting that. And Nesta was about 95% sure this was Elain’s doing.
“Why?”
“I want you there," Feyre told her as if it were obvious.
“Why?” Nesta asked again. She hadn't seen Feyre since Thanksgiving despite her sister living just on the outskirts of the city.
That had been weeks ago.
“It's complicated," Feyre responded quietly. She seemed to pause before finding the words. "I've been so worried about Cassian, we all have. He'd never been deployed for that long - five months. It was scary. I guess I took that out on you. I don't know why..."
She drifted off. Nesta held her breath.
"I'm sure Elain told you, but he's home now. I've been more myself since he returned, and I want you to come to dinner. I… miss you.”
She rubbed her temple. “I don’t know, Feyre.”
I don't know if I can pretend to be okay for an entire night. I don't know if you even fucking want me there or if you just feel obligated. I don't know if I can be in the same room as your douchebag boyfriend. I don't know if I can be surrounded by your friends, most of whom seem to dislike me. I don't know if I can behave like a normal fucking person.
I don't know.
“Please?” The plea was soft, quiet. It was like she was almost desperate. But for what?
Nesta looked out the window where a blue jay - their dad's favorite bird - was perched on a bare tree branch. The leaves had long ago fallen, leaving the world naked and vulnerable. “Yeah, I’ll be there.”
-------------------------
Feyre embraced her with an awkward hug when Nesta and Elain walked into the house. Nesta patted her on the back lightly, uncomfortable with the physical touch. Luckily, no one else seemed incline to embrace her. Rhys actually seemed to make sure he was as far away as possible.
Elain, on the other hand, gave everyone a hug. Mor gave a laugh as she squeezed Elain back, Aurra watching them with a smile. Interestingly enough, when Elain greeted Azriel with a hug, his tanned cheeks glowed red. It was almost imperceptible, but Nesta noticed.
Feyre took a step back to assess her. Nesta could see the judgement in her sister's eyes as she took in Nesta's noticeably thinner body. Luckily, however, she wasn't given the chance to comment on it when Elain piped up, "Where's Cassian? Nesta still hasn't met him yet."
"He's running a bit late," Rhys answered, glancing down at his phone. "Should be here in about ten minutes."
Everyone began to make their way into the dining room and Nesta followed. However, she was quickly tugged to the side when Amren swooped in out of nowhere and basically dragged Nesta into the privacy of the hallway. She stopped, crossed her arms over her chest, and glared at Nesta.
“Where have you been?” Amren demanded.
"What do you mean?" Nesta asked, playing dumb.
She hadn't spoken to Amren in a long time, even though they had each others' numbers. Even though Amren had repeatedly texted her, asking to get coffee or go for a walk or something else of the sorts. All of which went unanswered.
Amren rolled her eyes, and Nesta was convinced they went to the back of her head for a good minute. "Don't play dumb with me, Nesta."
“I don’t know, working?"
"Is that a question?" Amren rose a deadly brow.
Nesta huffed and mirrored Amren's angry stance. "Why are you interrogating me?"
“Because you've been radio silent for weeks. I had to ask Elain if you were still fucking alive," Amren explained. Then, she leaned in close like she didn't want anyone to hear. "I was worried about you, you bitch."
Nesta let out a sigh. "I'm sorry, okay? I've been busy. I do want to hang out, it's just that..." she trailed off.
"What? It's just that what?"
Nesta stared at the floor, unable to form words.
"Nesta, are you okay?" Amren asked, her voice softer.
Just tell her. Fucking tell her.
I was almost raped.
Just the thought was enough to make Nesta want to puke. She couldn't, it was too much and she wouldn't even be able to fucking say it and it's her fault, all her fault.
She breathed in through her nose and looked back up at Amren. She shot her the most fake smile she'd ever given. "I'm good. Seriously, I just got busy. It won't happen again."
Nesta saw the skepticism in Amren's eyes. But she conceded with a small sigh. "Well, don't do it again, okay? I seriously thought you were fucking murdered or some shit."
Nesta just nodded. Amren looked at her once more before gesturing with her chin back to the dining room. Nesta followed her.
When they rounded the corner, she stopped dead in her tracks.
Because sitting next to Feyre was the man who had tried to break into her apartment.
“Nesta!" Feyre exclaimed, calling her over from where she sat. "This is Cassian. Cassian, this is my sister, Nesta.”
Nesta simply stared at him like a deer in headlights and he stared at her, his lips parted in surprise. He was wearing a grey sweater, his long hair hanging down, no longer in a bun like it was the last time. He tucked it behind one ear.
"Are you stalking me or something?" Nesta said incredulously.
"I could ask you the same," Cassian retorted cheekily.
Feyre looked between them, a confused expression written on her face. "Do you guys know each other or something?"
"Something like that," Nesta mumbled.
Everyone's eyes were on them as they waited for an answer.
"Well as everyone knows, I live in the same building as Nesta and Elain," Cassian explained, waving a hand to the two sisters. "The other night, I got stupid drunk with a friend. He drove me back to my place and me, drunk off my fucking ass, tried to get into their apartment thinking it was mine."
The entire room erupted into laughter, Rhys choking on his food and Azriel looking up as if reasoning with the Gods.
"So when Nesta opened the door," Cassian continued, "she nearly beat me to death with a baseball bat."
Another round of laughter.
"Overreact much?"
Everyone's eyes flew to where Nesta sat. They seemed shocked. Nesta was too.
She didn't know why she said it, why she let it bother her. He was just so fucking frustrating, even his mere presence.
Cassian stuck his tongue out at her.
Feyre interrupted, her jaw agape. "You guys are acting like children."
Nesta got quiet after that. The conversation continued, thankfully taking the attention off her. As everyone laughed and conversed, Cassian looked over at her. His smile disappeared when he met Nesta's gaze. She just stared back at him, lips in a thin line. He seemed to try to gauge her reaction carefully, but her face was blank.
And so the night went on. Nesta didn't say another word after what happened. She avoided eye contact with Cassian. Avoided conversation with everyone.
It was half past eight when they all began clearing their dishes. Mor, Aurra, Azriel, and Cassian were all gathered in the kitchen cleaning up. Feyre and Rhys had excused themselves. It was just Nesta and Elain who remained in the dining room.
“I need to go to the bathroom,” Nesta leaned over to whisper to Elain.
Elain nodded. "We'll head out right after, yeah?" She must've noticed the exhaustion in Nesta's face.
Nesta agreed, excusing herself from the table.
She walked down the hallway, peeking through every door to find the bathroom. She was about to push through a door on the left that was slightly cracked open when she heard voices coming from within.
“I’m worried about him. He’s not the same.” It was Feyre.
“He never is when he comes home, Feyre," Rhys said dejectedly. "It’s happened before. Cass just needs time.”
Cass.
Nesta tiptoed closer to the door, just enough for her to listen.
“No, what he needs is to see someone!”
“I’ve tried. He doesn’t want to go.”
“Try harder, Rhys!” Feyre cried, her tone frustrated.
“We can’t just force him to go, okay?”
“Are you seeing what I’m seeing? Do you even notice how lost your own fucking brother is? Do you even care?!”
Silence.
“Rhysand, I’m sorry. Gods, I’m so sorry. I know you care. More than anyone. I just… I don’t want to lose him.”
She heard them both breathing deeply.
“C’mere,” Rhys murmured. Nesta heard Feyre's footsteps as she presumably walked toward him.
“We’ll figure it out, okay?”
“Together.”
“Always, Feyre darling.”
They got quiet, probably embracing each other. Nesta crept away from their bedroom door and into the bathroom before they could find her.
------------------------------------
Elain and Nesta had just unlocked their apartment door when Nesta groaned. “Oh, shit, I forgot my wallet in the car." She fished around in her bag to make sure it wasn't in there. "I’ll be right back.”
"I'll leave the door unlocked," Elain called behind her as Nesta made her way to the elevator.
She stepped between the doors, hitting the button for the parking garage. Gods, she just wanted to go to sleep. The night had been exhausting.
After a minute or so, she was approaching her car. She unlocked her door and grabbed her wallet that was in the middle console when a pair of headlights flashed past her, a car pulling into the spot next to her.
Before panic could set in, Nesta recognized who was driver the car through the window.
Cassian.
His car turned off and he emerged from the driver's door just a moment later. He looked over where Nesta was clutching her wallet to her chest staring at him. He gave her a tight-lipped smile before turning away and walking towards the elevator. Nesta had no choice to follow.
She walked just a few feet behind him as they made their way to the elevator.
"I'm sorry," Cassian told her, his voice sincere. He cast a concerned glance her way. "For embarrassing you at dinner. And if I scared you that night."
"You didn't embarrass me," Nesta snapped at him. "You were just being annoying as hell."
His entire body seemed to relax at her insult. Cassian tried to hide his smirk but failed. "I'm glad to see you're still your normal, hotheaded self. You got me worried at dinner with your stoic behavior."
Now she really glared at him. "Don't talk like you know me. You don't."
"Oh, sweetheart," he teased. "I think we're more similar than you think."
She scoffed. "I think that hubris of yours will be your downfall."
"You know, it's quite sexy when you use literary devices to insult me," he joked.
Nesta froze.
Was he coming onto her? Chills ran down her spine when she thought of the last time a man expressed interest in her.
It's not the same, she tried to convince yourself. He's not Tomas.
Cassian must've expected a heated response to his comment because he looked surprised when Nesta simply stared straight ahead. She seemed to be in a world of her own, oblivious to everything around her. Any trace of anger was gone, replaced by a cool indifference.
Cassian's face fell. "Nesta, I didn't mean to - "
He was cut off as the elevator door dinged opened and Nesta swiftly walked out.
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