#I guess this could be when Bucky becomes an avenger??? | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

srgntjamesbuckybarnes · 9 months ago

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Past, Present, ...

Summary: After sleeping with Bucky after months of comforting him during his nightmares, Y/N returns from a three-week mission to find out she's been replaced.

Rating: Mature

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Warnings: Near death, Implying attempted suicide (it's not)

Word Count: 5.7k

A/N: Not Beta'd. Dusting this off from the drafts. I wrote this while sleep deprived. Not sure how we got here but the original ending wasn't a happy one. Enjoy whatever this is instead.

How much space is too much?

According to James Bucky Barnes, three weeks isn't enough.

Three weeks on an assignment was enough for Y/N to become homesick. She understood she would have to pause her life to save the world, but what no one informed her was that the rest of the world would continue to play.

“Y/L/N?” A familiar voice shouted.

Adjusting the strap of her duffle bag on her shoulder, Y/N turned her head to find her co-worker jogging towards her. Slanting her eyes, Y/N raised her palm to block out the sun.

“Wilson,” she addressed the man when he was near.

Bent over with his hands on his knees, Sam panted. His sweatshirt stretched across his back making the dark patch of sweat more prominent. Squinting up at Y/N, Sam breathed, “Did you just get back?”

Y/N bobbed her head, adjusting the strap on her shoulder once more for emphasis rather than comfort. She did not need to ask to know Sam just returned from his run. He usually ran with Steve and Bucky, but they always finished well before Sam. It wasn’t uncommon for him to return hours after the super-soldiers.

Pushing off his knees, Sam stood, tilting his head toward one of the many entrances in Avengers Tower. He knew better than to offer to carry her duffle bag. The weight of missions was often packed in the bags they returned with.

Y/N and Sam strolled side by side. Sam only paused to open the door for Y/N. Trekking into the tower, he could finally relax his eyes from the intense sun. The two stood shoulder to shoulder, waiting for the elevator to arrive.

“I thought you were already back,” Sam admitted, watching the light above the elevator doors.

Y/N furrowed her eyebrows. Her mission was supposed to be longer. If anything, he should have anticipated her return later. Facing the man beside her, she asked, “Why?”

Ding.

Scrambling into the elevator, Sam leaned against the wall across from Y/N. She reflected his behavior, leaning against the wall behind her.

Once the elevator started moving, Sam confessed, “Bucky skipped his run today. I thought I saw you with him before I left. Guess I was wrong.”

Y/N bit her bottom lip, reopening a recently closed wound. She released her lip long enough to confirm what Sam already knew. “You were wrong.” Ignoring the coppery taste flooding her tongue, she drew her bottom lip between her teeth again.

She hadn’t seen her teammates in three weeks. She hadn’t seen Bucky longer. She assumed they were doing great, but Bucky didn't share her thoughts. He denied it, yet he went out of his way to avoid her since their last mission together, since they slept together. How one could be sweet in one moment and cold in another, Y/N would never understand.

Y/N and Bucky started off rocky. He hated her from the moment they met. Bucky was struggling in the field, so Steve asked her to keep an eye on him. Bucky rejected her the second Steve introduced them. He saw through Steve’s plan and stomped his feet like a child. Rather than confirm Bucky’s insinuation, Steve vouched that she deserved to be on the team for her talents, not to babysit Bucky. He even suggested that Y/N and Bucky spar to prove it. Bucky loathed her then. She laid him out several times that day. It was the reason Steve sought her out in the first place. Bucky was a far more experienced fighter than Y/N. He should have won every fight. He lost them all.

Muffled voices were heard from the other side of the doors. Voices Y/N craved to hear since she departed for her mission. When the doors spread, Sam was the first to enter the room. “Hey guys,” he called out, extending his hands toward Y/N, “look who I found.”

Y/N tentatively stepped off the elevator, joining her friends in the living room. She couldn’t remember the last time she had seen so many eyes on her. “I didn’t know there was a party,” she joked, waving.

Tony was the first to speak up, a glass of honey liquid in hand, “Glad, you're back. We were just getting to know Bucky’s girlfriend over here.” He lifted his glass.

Y/N’s eyes followed the direction of Tony’s glass. Her hand tautened around the strap of her duffle bag for support. Y/N hadn’t noticed the extra body in the room at first. The team always had someone over for business or pleasure; it didn’t matter. This time it did because staring back at her was Bucky’s guest, his girlfriend, undoubtedly here for pleasure.

The stunning woman beside Bucky introduced herself. “Hi, I’m Evangelina, but everyone calls me Lina.” Y/N could see the muscles in her uncovered arms tense. Even though she couldn’t see the hand attached to the arm from the other side of the bar, she knew Evangelina was holding Bucky’s flesh hand. “But Bucky calls me Angel,” she added, batting her eyelashes at Bucky.

The woman wasn't solely attractive; she also had a heavenly name. Y/N mentally gagged at the thought of hearing Bucky call his girlfriend Angel.

The coward refused to meet Y/N’s eyes. He took a lengthy drink from a glass matching Tony’s. Stark usually drank top-shelf liquor. Y/N might have been concerned under different circumstances, but she knew the liquor did not affect him, unlike herself.

“Y/N,” she weakly introduced herself, gnawing on her bottom lip again.

“We were just having drinks. Care to join us? There is plenty of alcohol. I can make you something,” Evangelina offered politely.

Y/N’s teeth clamped tight on her bottom lip. She spent three weeks wishing she could return to the tower, only to be treated like a guest, an outsider in her own home.

It was then that Bucky decided to face her, yet his eyes looked right through her. Y/N’s chest tightened. She didn’t know it was feasible to feel more alone in her home, surrounded by friends and a man she had been intimate with, than by herself in a foreign country. She wondered if he could see the hurt written on her face.

“I-I don’t-”

Bucky’s whiskey-strained voice interrupted, “No. No drinks.”

A gasp pulled Y/N's attention away from the couple. Cold, pale hands rested on her cheeks, rotating her head from side to side. “Y/N, you’re bleeding,” Natasha chastised.

Wrestling out of Natasha’s hold, Y/N utilized the back of her hand to wipe the blood from her lip. Staring at the crimson fluid coating her skin, Y/N jerked her head. “I can’t.” Blindly smashing the elevator button behind her, she whispered, “I have to…” her voice trailed off as she jabbed her thumb over her shoulder. Disregarding everyone’s silent questions, she bolted into the elevator, only letting her shoulders sag when the doors closed. The strap of her duffle bag slid from her shoulder landing with a thud. Gliding her back down the wall, Y/N cradled her knees and wept.

Every night before bed, Y/N prayed the sun would never rise because when day broke, Bucky vanished. Her dreams filled with memories of their last mission together. Reality was the price of admission for eight hours in heaven.

Y/N clenched her jaw at every public display of affection between the new couple. In the time she had known him, Bucky had never been touchy-feely in public. Now, he couldn’t appear to stop. Bucky only ever reached for Y/N after a nightmare or horrific mission. He reached for her at his lowest and she responded with open arms. He might have another woman occupying his bed, but he continued to fuck with her head.

The voice in her head wasn’t her own anymore. Every thought she had echoed back in his familiar deep timber. She couldn’t shake him. A twisted part of her brain wondered if he couldn’t shake her either.

Sam’s comment when she returned from her assignment should have been her first clue. He had mistaken Evangelina for her. Sam had been the first to mention the resemblance between the two, but it wasn’t the last time Y/N received those kinds of comments.

In the time that Y/N had gotten to know Evangelina, which wasn’t much, she concluded that she didn’t hate her. The two had more in common than she wanted to admit. Evangelina made it a point to befriend all of the Avengers; Y/N included. Y/N hated that she enjoyed her company. It was a tough pill to swallow at first, but she couldn’t hate the woman for her taste in men. Who didn’t find Bucky Barnes attractive?

Bucky had been more challenging to read. He didn’t prevent the women from becoming friends, but he didn’t encourage it either. He continued to keep his distance from Y/N, only interacting with her in group settings.

The Avengers were unaware of Bucky and Y/N’s history. Their relationship was exclusively behind closed doors. Y/N wondered if Evangelina would be her confidante if she knew Y/N had warmed his bed first. Maybe Bucky told her and that was why she pushed to be Y/N’s friend. Maybe that was the reason she asked to raid Y/N’s closet for her date with Bucky. Even though Y/N desperately wanted to slam the door in her face, Evangelina was innocent in the situation. So, she agreed.

“You have so many pretty dresses,” Evangelina said in awe. Her hand ran across each piece of fabric dangling in the wardrobe.

Y/N’s fingers plucked at a loose thread on her comforter. Although they were now friends, helping Bucky’s girlfriend pick out an outfit for their date was still awkward. At least it was on Y/N’s end. Evangelina was none the wiser.

“Perks of being an Avenger.”

“What’s it like being an Avenger? Bucky never talks about his work life. He’s always tense when he returns from a mission.”

Y/N raised an eyebrow even though the other woman couldn’t see her. Bucky was slow to open up, especially about his past as the Winter Soldier. Y/N wasn’t surprised he dodged the topic. Ever since Natasha leaked classified files, Bucky’s past became public knowledge. Bucky and Evangelina’s relationship progressed beyond what Y/N previously had with Bucky, at least on the surface. She didn’t know much about their life behind closed doors. Bucky never took Y/N on a date or made her his girlfriend, but he let her hold him in her arms at night and let her in after a difficult mission. Yet his girlfriend practically confessed she knew nothing about his troubles. That was what shocked Y/N.

“It’s…” she paused, attempting to find the right words to convey the difficulties of the job without disturbing her. “It’s like war. You save and lose people. It’s rewarding and sucks at the same time.”

Evangelina pivoted with a black cocktail dress in hand. “That sounds awful.”

Y/N shrugged. “People do it every day. Steve, Sam, and Bucky were all military men before this.” She waved her hands around the room.

Evangelina caught the shift in Y/N’s tone. It wasn’t something she wanted to talk about, a reaction Evangelina grew used to from her exchanges with Bucky. Altering the subject, Evangelina pressed the cocktail dress flush to her body. “What about this one?”

Y/N sucked in a deep breath. She wore the dress on her last mission with Bucky. Though he didn’t say it in public, his reaction when they returned to the safe house that night was enough to know Bucky admired the dress. With Evangelina’s similar figure, Y/N knew Bucky would equally appreciate it on her, especially since he wouldn’t get to rip it off of Y/N again.

She would have told Evangelina about the dress, but it was none of her business. The past was in the past. One Evangelina wasn’t a part of. If Bucky hadn’t told her about their past neither would she. Was it bad to send Evangelina on a date in the dress Bucky had fucked her in? Probably. Did she hope he would think about her the entire date? Absolutely.

Clearing her throat, Y/N plastered a phony smile on her face. “Good choice.” After the date, the dress would be tarnished, like rerecording over an old tape.

Y/N never considered herself a masochist, but she couldn’t escape the role of a domestic sinner. She couldn’t sabotage Evangelina’s relationship no matter how Bucky made her feel; however, she could ruin her own relationship. There was a time in her life when she thought Bucky was the one. Part of her still believed it. It was the part she had to sacrifice.

She told herself Bucky’s soft caresses and lingering stares meant nothing, that every promise spoken was a lie to satisfy the moment. Everything Y/N ever loved had been hard to part with, so she convinced herself Bucky never truly loved her. He couldn’t with how readily he replaced her. Could he? It didn’t matter because he chose Evangelina.

“Hey, Y/N,” Steve welcomed jovially.

Y/N furrowed her eyebrows as Steve’s voice carried down the hall. Who was he talking to? Rounding the corner just in time, she hadn’t missed the way Steve’s eyes enlarged at the sight of her.

“I didn’t realize,” Steve began, his eyes flashing between both women. “I thought you were Y/N.”

Evangelina chuckled, gliding her hands across her abdomen to smooth down the front of the dress. “I’ll take that as a compliment. Y/N was considerate enough to lend me her dress.” She turned to Y/N, who was still standing in the archway of the lobby. “Thanks again.”

Before Y/N could reply, a hand slinked around her waist, drawing her into a solid body. Startled, Y/N tensed.

“Hey, Ange-” Bucky’s tongue twisted as his eyes landed on Y/N. He was relieved he peeked at her face before he complimented her appearance. He dragged his arm back to his side in a flash. “Sorry, I wasn’t expecting you to be here.”

Y/N chewed her lip, taking a step back. Bucky was dressed from head to toe in black, matching Evangelina. Y/N wondered if they planned to dress for her funeral before or after they killed off any romantic feelings she had for Bucky.

“I did the same thing,” Steve laughed. Bucky glowered at him, forcing his hands into his pockets. Steve held his hands up, “I didn’t touch anyone though, that was all you.”

Bucky grumbled, crossing the lobby to plant a kiss on Evangelina’s forehead. His right hand rested on the small of her back. “You look gorgeous,” he whispered against her hairline.

Evangelina grinned, “You don’t look bad yourself.”

Y/N couldn’t argue with that.

The faint smile on Bucky’s lips disappeared as the hand on Evangelina’s back ran up her spine. The tips of his fingers halted over a loose thread beside the zipper. Anyone would have glossed over it, but not Bucky. Not when he was the one to patch the dress up and certainly not when he was the one to tear it in the first place. When his gaze collided with Y/N’s, she knew he recognized the dress. His eyes blatantly proceeded to check her out.

Y/N flushed as he studied her; however, the moment his eyes drifted to his best friend, Y/N’s blood ran cold. “Are you two,” he pointed between Y/N and Steve. His voice was unable to fully ask the question he wanted to.

Steve slung his arm over Y/N’s shoulder. It was meant to be a joke, but Y/N saw the blaze in Bucky’s eyes. She didn’t know if it was directed at Steve or herself.

“I wish,” Steve beamed down at her. “I have a conference with Fury in an hour. I was hoping to get there early.”

Y/N sent Steve a soft smile. Steve and Bucky were best friends. If anyone knew what transpired between the two on their last mission, it would be Steve. His reaction proved otherwise. She was confident Steve didn’t know about her past with Bucky or he wouldn’t have unknowingly taunted Bucky.

Evangelina ran her hand along Bucky’s back affectionately. “What about you, Y/N? That dress looks amazing on you. I’m almost jealous I didn’t borrow that one.”

Untangling herself from Steve’s hold, Y/N focused on responding to her new friend rather than Bucky. Puffing out her chest, Y/N said, “Thanks, Lina. I have a date.”

Evangelina grinned, “You should join us.” She directed her attention to Bucky, slapping the center of his chest. “They should join us.”

Y/N’s eyes bulged at the prospect of a double date with Bucky. Absolutely not.

“Could be fun,” Bucky added, but his voice lacked emotion.

She officially lost her mind. There was no way Bucky was actually on board with this idea. The man spent most of his time avoiding her. The second she attempts to move on, he tries to interfere. No. No. No.

Y/N shook her head, lying through her teeth, “It’s still new. I’m not ready to introduce him to anyone I know yet.”

Bucky’s eyes lingered on Y/N’s figure for a moment. “That’s not exactly a new relationship kind of dress.” His eyes narrowed in a challenge.

Y/N pursed her lips. “It is for the kind of relationship he and I have.”

Bucky and Y/N’s first assignment together was a disaster. Bucky wasn't prepared to return to the field, but he insisted he was fine. The mission was successful, but only after Bucky hesitated and Y/N was stabbed. The knife was meant for Bucky, and he took her sacrifice for his mistake poorly. They argued even while Y/N was getting stitched up. At the time, they couldn’t stand one another, but looking back on it, it was the tipping point from enemies to friends.

Tony pressured the two to get along for everyone's sake. He suggested going out for a drink and hashing it out. It was the typical outing for a man of Tony’s status with enemies. Bucky had been the first to yield, offering to buy Y/N a drink. As long as it meant they could move forward, he didn’t care. Y/N declined. Bucky scowled in frustration.

“I probably shouldn't tell you this, but ever since the whole enhanced superpower thing, alcohol is like poison to me.”

Bucky’s face softened. Alcohol had been an issue for him and Steve as well. He detested that he couldn’t get drunk, especially with the unwanted memories that plagued his head frequently. It paled in comparison to her side effects. At least he could still consume the liquid and pretend.

“How about dinner then?” Bucky proposed.

Y/N nodded. “Dinner would be great.”

After that, the pair functioned well together. At least until Y/N witnessed Bucky’s nightmares or when he pulled away from everyone after a challenging mission. That was when Y/N began comforting Bucky. While it wasn’t a problem before, it was now.

“Stop staring at me,” Bucky grumbled.

Y/N couldn’t tear her eyes away from the super-soldier. It was their first mission together since he began dating Evangelina. The two of them were trapped in a safe house on the other side of the world. It wasn’t the first time they had stayed in this particular safe house. It was the exact safe house they inhabited on their last mission.

“You’re hurt,” Y/N observed. Bucky naturally had a sway in his gate. Today, it was heavier, as if he had been lugging extra weight around for hours.

“I’m fine,” Bucky rasped, keeping his back to Y/N. He kept his focus on igniting the fire in the fireplace before them.

Y/N frowned. “I don't mean physically.” Bucky remained silent. “Maybe you should call Evangelina,” she proposed. It was the practical thing to suggest, but it seemed to have the opposite effect on Bucky than she intended.

Bucky whirled around; the fire blazed behind him. “I said I’m fine,” he barked. His dark eyes pinned her to her spot on the worn couch.

Y/N chewed her bottom lip. If he was going to get angry with her for caring, then she’d get furious right back. “If you’re so fine, then why have you been avoiding me?”

Bucky grumbled something under his breath, running his hand through his hair. “I already told you, I haven’t-”

“Bullshit.” Y/N rose from her seat. “You fucked me after that HYDRA mission and discarded me like garbage,” she fumed. “I gave you space. I’m gone not even an entire month and suddenly you have a girlfriend. Fuck you, James.”

Bucky stormed the room until he was standing in front of her. His nostrils flared as he ran his tongue along his teeth before baring his teeth. Y/N tipped her head back, daring him to put his hands on her. Bucky studied her face momentarily, their faces hairsbreadths from one another as he hissed, “Fuck. You. Y/N.” From this distance, she could see the muscles in his face twist. She knew he was pissed. Bucky pulled away. “You think you know everything. You have no idea what it's like to have someone fuck with your head.”

Y/N shoved his chest hard. Bucky didn’t even flinch. “You! You’ve been driving me insane with your games!” Her hands moved to shove him again, but he caught both of her wrists.

“Don’t,” he growled.

Y/N ripped herself free from his hold. His grip wasn't tight enough to hurt, still she rubbed her wrist anyway, trying to rid her body of his touch.

“Go back to your boyfriend, Y/N,” he commanded.

Y/N squinted at the man in front of her. This version of him was a stranger. “I heard you,” she voiced softly. “That night,” she pointed to the bedroom down the hall, “when you thought I was asleep, you said you love me.”

If she wasn’t an Avenger, she wouldn’t have detected the way his eyes widened for a fraction of a second. Bucky no longer had to wear a mask from HYDRA, but it seemed everyone except Bucky got the memo. His voice matched the stone-cold expression he wore. “I lied.”

It was the lack of sympathy in his voice that slammed the casket closed. With two little words, Bucky Barnes had buried her in the same place he made love to her.

Bucky returned to the tower after dropping Evangelina off when he stumbled across Natasha with a glass of wine in hand. She was snuggled under a blanket on the couch, watching a true crime show. Since he was unsure where everyone else had gone, he settled on the spot beside Natasha.

“Long night?” Natasha questioned, side-eying the brunette.

Bucky moaned, running his hands down his face. “Long week.”

Natasha swirled her glass of wine. “There is still a bit of wine left. It won't get you drunk but it might help you relax.”

Bucky pursed his lips. “I don’t think that will help.”

Natasha shrugged. “There’s some liquor Y/N’s boyfriend left on the counter over there.” She pointed to the nearly empty bottle across the room. “I’m sure he wouldn’t mind sharing.”

Bucky raised an eyebrow, “He’s here?”

The red head nodded. “They just got back from dinner. She said they were going upstairs to watch a movie, but after the amount of alcohol they had, I’m sure they are doing more than that.” She wiggled her eyebrows.

Bucky stiffened. “They were both drinking?”

“Yeah. The boyfriend came down a couple times to make mixed drinks. He offered me one the last time he was down here, but,” she raised her wine glass.

Before Natasha could continue, Bucky was out of the room, taking the stairs three at a time. He didn’t expect Natasha to understand. People didn’t go around broadcasting their weaknesses. Y/N told him hers, despite them not being friends. It wasn’t his position to share the information. He regretted it now.

Bucky pounded his fist on the wooden door of Y/N's bedroom with a force that made the hinges creak. “Y/N, you in there? Open up,” he pleaded, his voice laced with concern. When he tried the handle and found it locked, his heart sank. “Y/N,” his voice grew more desperate. He could hear shuffling on the other side of the door and leaned in, straining to hear anything that might give him an indication of what was transpiring inside. Despite his repeated requests, the door remained sealed shut, and Bucky's impatience and frustration mounted with each passing second. His voice grew louder, his fists clenched tightly, as he roared for Y/N to open the goddamn door. But there was no response. Finally, Bucky stepped back, his eyes flashing with rage, preparing to kick the door down.

The door opened the second Bucky lifted his boot. A man Bucky had never seen before pushed past him, flying down the hallway. “I didn’t do anything,” he cried as he stepped onto the elevator.

Whiplash hit Bucky hard. His head twisted between the man on the elevator and Y/N’s open bedroom door. The second he caught sight of the man's face, he filed it away preparing to deal with him later. Bucky ran into Y/N’s room. His heartbeat drummed loudly, drowning out the sound of the TV playing in the background. He called her name, but there was no response. He scanned the entire room, finding it empty. His boot kicked a glass, the brown liquid staining the carpet. With a lump in his throat, Bucky knocked on the bathroom door and waited for half a heartbeat before he jerked the door wide open.

There she was, sprawled out on the bathroom floor. Bucky crouched down beside her. His flesh hand shook her shoulder as he called her name. No response. He rolled her onto her back, his fingers searching for the pulse on her neck. Bucky almost missed the faint thrum of her pulse beneath his fingers. His own body was shaking. He called her name once again but was met with silence.

“F.R.I.D.A.Y. send the medical unit to Y/N’s room,” his voice quivered as he addressed Tony’s artificial intelligence.

He stepped over her to turn the shower on. Leaving the sliding glass door open, he enveloped her torso in his arms, dragging her bodying into the shower. Crumbling to the floor behind her, he cradled her body under the spray of the cold water.

“Come on, Y/N. Wake up,” he pleaded. He tapped her face repeatedly. “Come on. Not like this,” his voice began shattering. Her head lulled into his chest. Bucky’s fist clenched, mindful not to crush her, as a loud sob tore through his chest. Bucky held her tighter than the clothes adhering to their skin beneath the water. He swayed her slowly as tears gushed down his face. “Come on Y/N. Come back to me,” he croaked. “Tell me to go fuck myself. Anything,” he begged, praying for a reaction. It was futile. Bucky smashed his lips onto the top of her head. “I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry.”

Beep. Beep. Beep.

Y/N’s eyes fluttered open with a groan. Her body was sore on the brink of death. One look around the room confirmed she nearly died. She visited the medical wing frequently between missions. The injuries she had endured on the missions were nothing in comparison to what she was experiencing now.

A pressure landing on the back of her hand had her head snapping to her side. Bucky sat with his forehead pressed to the back of her hand, a prayer escaping his lips. Y/N furrowed her eyebrows searching for her last memory of Bucky.

The brunette lifted his head, running his fingers through her hair. “You scared me,” his voice was shaky, his eyes never left her face.

“Where’s-”

Bucky snarled, “Your boyfriend? Don’t worry about him, he’s an asshole.”

Y/N flinched. “He didn’t know.”

“That’s not why he’s an asshole. He ran and left you on the bathroom floor to die.” Bucky watched as Y/N processed the new information. The lack of surprise concerned him. He didn’t want to ask, but he needed to know. “Did you know there was alcohol in your drink?”

Y/N scoffed, crossing her arms. “Of course, I didn’t, Bucky. You’re an asshole for leaving me too. I’m pissed at you. I’m not suicidal. You did your good deed. I’m alive. Now you can go back to your Angel.” She spat the last words, parodying his words from the safe house.

Bucky sat back in his seat, rubbing his chin. He hadn’t meant to hurt her. He just wanted to push her away. He pushed too far. He almost lost her. He couldn’t avoid her any longer, she deserved an explanation.

“It wasn’t a lie,” he mumbled. Part of him didn’t want her to hear it, still wanting to starve off the conversation.

“What?”

He took a deep breath, leaning forward. His elbows rested on his knees with his hands clasped in front of him. His face turned serious. “I love you.” Y/N’s heart skipped a beat while her face turned sour. “But I can't be with you.”

A tear rolled down her cheek. “Why are you doing this? Why now?”

Bucky winced at the hurt in her voice. It hurt him too. That’s why he avoided the conversation for so long. “I’m too vulnerable around you. I fall back into my head way too easily. I don’t want to be reminded of my past. Then I met Ang- Evangelina and suddenly, I’m not thinking about all of the people I’ve killed, or the way HYDRA tortured me. With her, I’m living in the present.”

Y/N sat up harshly, the tears had stopped flowing a few sentences ago. “Because you won’t open up to her! You’re running from your problems and the second she’s gone, you’re gonna be stuck in your head again. Alone this time. Sorry, I was only a distraction long enough for you to fuck me. You don’t love her. You love the idea of normalcy with me!” She insisted, jabbing her finger into her chest.

Bucky closed his eyes, his head in his hands.

“For fucks sake, Bucky. She looks like me. This isn’t reality. This isn’t you. You're playing a role in some cheesy romcom. You’re letting her emulate me to fill a spot. She’s my understudy and you know it.”

Bucky ran his hands through his hair before looking up at her. Teary-eyed, he confessed, “I don’t know what to do. I don’t know who I am anymore. I just want to be normal again.” His head rested on his bent arms, leaning against the bed. His back jolted with each sob.

Y/N rubbed between his shoulder blades. “We’re not normal Bucky. None of the Avengers are, but we’re real.” She ran her hand through his hair comfortingly. “You and me, we’re real.”

He wiped his tears, shaking his head, “She’s out looking for a dog for us to adopt.”

Y/N scrunched her nose. They were taking the next step. Before she knows it, they'll be moving in together, getting married, and have a kid on the way.

“I don’t even want a dog. I couldn’t take care of it with my lifestyle. It just seemed like the normal thing to do. Most families have dogs.”

Y/N hated the idea of Bucky considering a family with Evangelina. She knew him better though. “I always took you for a cat person.”

Bucky smiled at her. “Yeah? What about you? Are you a cat person?”

She nodded. “Less work to train. More realistic in our lifestyle.”

Bucky hummed. The idea of them sharing anything both scared and delighted Bucky. “What kind of cat would we get?”

The corner of Y/N’s lips turned upward. Playing along, she didn’t need to think about her answer, she had already thought about it before. “It doesn’t matter, but he’d have to be white so I could see him against all of your black clothes. Although, cat hairs might be a pain before missions.”

Bucky nodded, his elbow on the bed, propped his head up in his hand. His other hand held Y/N’s as his thumb rubbed circles on the back of her hand as she talked. With a raised eyebrow, Bucky asked, “He?”

Y/N nodded, offended he would suggest otherwise. “You know, so I can come home to my boys. Plus, you need more friends. You two can have a guy's night while I’m away.”

“What if I want to come home to my girls?” Bucky argued.

Y/N rolled her eyes. “We’ll let fate decide. Whichever we find first.”

He nodded, agreeing to the compromise. “Alpine.”

“Huh?”

Bucky sighed dreamily, “The name.” It was too easy talking with Y/N about adopting a cat as if they were discussing children. It hadn’t crossed Y/N’s mind yet, but Bucky was aware that he wasn’t thinking of the past. He was thinking of the future. A future with Y/N.

Y/N snorted. It wasn’t the name she would have picked but Bucky liked it. She got to pick the color; it was only fair Bucky got to pick the name. “Alpine it is.”

Three weeks later, Bucky and Y/N welcomed Alpine to their shared room at Avengers Tower. The team melted when they met the feline. Even Evangelina. Despite the breakup, Y/N and Evangelina remained friends. The women were filled with too much grace and poise, not to. A trait Bucky had admired in both of them. It should have unsettled Bucky for them to remain friends, but Bucky knew where he belonged now. He might not know who he was or who he is now, but he was certain his future was Y/N.

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winterarmyy · 10 months ago

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Kiss It Better

A series of random Bucky Drabbles that I can't let go but don't have the brain to make the whole complete plot of.

Summary: In which the reader refused to let Bucky go down on her lately because she's embarrassed of the chafing marks on her inner thighs.

Pairing: avenger!bucky x female!reader

Words: 3.2k++

Warnings: 18+ contents, no minors allowed, nsfw, cunnilingus, cum eating, soft fluff, not much of angst but there's sprinkles of feels, body insecurities, bucky is in love and in heat tbh, i think he is particularly unhinged and filthy in this one but hey, you tell me. idk if i need to remind y'all about this but english is not my first language so my grammar are prolly fucked. Anyway--

Inspiration: Guess who felt a little soft and decided to wear a skirt to work? Yup, that would be me. No, because I commute to work (or basically anywhere) and there is quite a distance of walking in between the journey. Note that your girl here walk fast asf (basically running at this point). And because them inner thighs ain't got no gap between them, so i got myself some blisters/chafing :') then i fell into a self-deprecating despair for the whole day and it hurts whenever i walk, at that time i just want Bucky to kiss it better. Fast forward a few days later, here we are.

Read my other works here: Masterlist

She could feel it. His burning gaze following her every move. Observing, calculating. And she knew that must not show any signs of discomfort; not on her face nor from the slightest jolts of her hips. She must not gave him a reason to question her.

She can't.

So she continue walking around their room, back and forth from the bathroom to the wardrobe, as if every step she took was followed by a burning sensation on her skin. She momentarily stood in front of the row of clothes hanging on the rack, her back facing the bed where Bucky had been sprawling on since she went in for a shower.

Honestly, she was standing there suspiciously 'too long', as if she was choosing an outfit for a date night, when clearly she was just getting ready for bed. When she realized that, she quickly pulled out a clean set of pyjamas and walk back into the bathroom.

Bucky's eagle eyes followed her figure, disappearing behind the locked door. His lips pursed as his cogs of thoughts spins around, trying to find answer a question that his lover keeps avoiding but it was useless.

He can't think straight. Especially when he was undeniably famished. He had not got a taste of her his sweet pussy for about 2 weeks now and he was quite literally about lose his fucking mind.

When his sweetgirl refuses to go further than kissing and making out, of course he obliged. She has every right to 'no' and he respects her wishes. Then it happened again the next day. And the next. Then again, and again.

Normally, people would've assumed that maybe she was on her period, and she is not comfortable having any sexual intimacy when menstruating. But, Bucky can tell that, that was not it. Because first of all, it was way too early for that time of the month, he knows her schedule.l very well. Second of all, he would've smell the blood if she was on her period.

Most of his senses are enhanced after all.

So, why was she avoiding it?

Bucky's is completely fine if sex was not something she wanted to do, but not even letting him eat her out? Now that's concerning. At least for him.

Because he needs her. He needs to suck on that needy little clit of hers, make it wet and swollen. He needs to lap on that sweet juices when she cums on his tongue.

Fuck. He's getting all work up now, thinking about it.

He swore that if this keeps going on, one of these days he might just spread his legs and fuck his fist on their bed while she's tied on a chair on the other side of the room. Maybe forcing her; seducing her, to watch his desperate cock become wet and messy would give her a clue of what he is feeling now.

Absolutely needy and deprived of that pretty little cunt of hers.

He was quite distracted with the filfthy thoughts until he heard the clicking sound of the bathroom door unlocked.

As she walked towards the bed, Bucky felt like his lungs stopped providing oxygen through his body, "Pretty." His eyes sparkled affection as the voice in his head echoed his thoughts. It wasn't that he have not seen her in those pyjamas before, he had. Many times in fact. The very same lavender set with tiny little cartoon cats printed all over the fabric.

The same ones that she wore when she came rushing to his side on one of those sleepless night. The time when she hold him close, distracting him away from the nightmare by asking the most random question of "You know, Bucky... These cats supposedly have the same expression, except for one. Do want to try and find it?"

He found it. It was near the hem of her right sleeve. And by that time, his nightmare was no where near his mind, the next thing he knew, he fell right back to sleep with her in his arms. It was his favourite pair of pyjamas that she ever worn. Nothing compares.

A loving smile unconsciously appeared on his face when his lady threw a sweet smile at him as she walked toward the bed, "My baby's so pretty." He thought.

The grin on his lips lasted, but not for long. Especially when he saw the tiny frown on her face, the faltered steps and when he heard that brief sound of a painful hiss slipped out of her lips.

So the moment she sat down on her side of the bed, Bucky already had his hands on her. Arms instantaneously wrapped around her waist, before effortlessly pulling her back onto his sturdy chest.

She giggled gleefully from his sudden rush of affection and that surely managed to trigger a chuckle out of Bucky. He hums and proceed to purr in crook of her neck, "What's wrong, baby?"

She could feel his throat rumbling at the back of her neck, "Did he notice it?". Her heart beat ever so slightly picked up its' pace but she planned to act like opposite of it, "Hmm? What do mean 'what's wrong'?" She asked.

Bucky can hear the change tempo coming from within her ribcage, he knew something was wrong, "I just want to know how are you feeling." He pressed a long and tender kiss on the shoulder.

The warmth of his breath tickled her skin, "Now? Hmm. I feel very loved." She smiled dreamily as she closes her eyes.

Bucky left out a brief laugh at her response, this cheeky little bunny, "That's true, but how are you really feeling, hmm? Like physically?" He urges softly.

She thought about it for awhile; contemplating whether she should just tell him the truth or proceed to act like she okay. Well, she chose the latter, "Hmmm physically. In this position? Very comfy." She wiggled her body back into him, closing the non-existent gap between their bodies and gripping Bucky's arms around her a little tight.

Though her plushy ass was rubbing against his crotch just nicely, but the former winter soldier was not going to let that distract him from his mission. He needs to know what she's hiding behind that sweet smile, "Doll..." his voice was stern and she knew he was not having it.

His calling was only met with silence when she didn't reply verbally. Since she was looking down, Bucky cannot see the frown on face and the wobbling worries in her eyes. But he did picked up on the anxiousness of her heart; beating faster by the second.

"I..." her voice cracked at the first word she said, and Bucky knew he fucked up. He swiftly maneuvered her body to sit on his lap, facing him. His metal hand craddled her soft cheek, and his flesh ones gently caresses her back, "Hey hey hey, doll, what's wrong? Shit. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to pressure you." His voice was laced with panic.

When she only had her gaze down, Bucky tenderly coaxed her, "Bunny, look at me." His hand guided her by the chin and when they made eye contact, he apologized again, "I'm sorry. I just want you to feel better. Forgive me." He leaned in a planted a kiss on her forehead. Then, her nose. And her cheeks, all over her face, muttering his words of apology.

She felt bad that Bucky apologized for something that was clearly not his fault. She's the problem in this situation. Her negativity, her insecurity was what drove her away from Bucky for the past 2 weeks. She knew that. And she knew it wasn't fair to him.

Knowing Bucky, he's probably blaming himself for her actions. And she didn't want that. She decided to tell him the truth, "I just..." Anxiety runs through her veins when she thought about it again. Would she be able to handle it if Bucky reacted negatively to her truth? Probably, not. "Just... promise that you won't be disgusted by it... Or get the ick from it."

Bucky frowned in confusion, "I don't even know what 'get the ick' means but I promise." He swore.

She let out a short laugh at his comment, causing him to smile along. Seeing how loving his gaze was, it gave her the strength to confess. She started with explaining how she had been busy at work this month. With launch of the new product, and her being one of th product manager, she was obligated to visit the branches around New York.

Bucky listened to words attentively, at first he thought maybe she was trying to say that she's been stressed lately. But then she started to explained about how she had been wearing skirts to work most of the days, because it was one of the their campaign's rules and Bucky does not think that 'stress' was what this would conclude to.

Nevertheless, he didn't lose his attention.

"But basically what I'm trying to say is..." She took a deep breath before continuing, "It's just... My inner thighs are chafed..." her voice was barely audible at the end of the sentence but Bucky caught it perfectly.

He thought about it for awhile before asking, "So, you mean to say that you got blisters on your inner thighs?" He wanted to confirm that his understanding was accurate.

She looked down in shame as she nodded to his question.

Bucky responded by pulling her closer, and kissed her forehead, "Aww doll. Is this why you've been avoiding me? Because it hurts? Why didn't you tell me earlier? I could've helped you. I mean I could help apply some meds or--"

Horrified at the idea of him seeing marks; the literal reminder of how fat she is caused her to blurt, "No!" She pushed Bucky away, eyes widen in horrid.

"No?" Bucky frowned quizzically at her intense reaction.

Realizing what she just had just done, she composed herself, and spoke, "It's... it's not a pretty sight. And I don't want to show it to you. Plus, if my thighs are a little thinner than they are now. Then, this wouldn't happen. If only these thighs are not like... fucking fat as they are we wouldn't have to go through this. And you wouldn't need to hear all this. You wouldn't---"

Bucky knew that once she was in the state of insecurity, she self-deprecate herself like she was less worthy than the goddesss that she is. So, instead of arguing with her, he simply intercepted her rambling, "Show me."

She stopped the seemingly endless word-vomit, and titled her head to the side, "Huh? No. Bucky I just said--"

Bucky grabbed her by the waist and effortlessly lifted her off his lap and onto the bed, caging her below him, "And I said... Show. Me." His tone was more like an order rather than a request.

She didn't dare to defy him, when his gaze was as rigid as they were now, so pulled her pants off; slowly, reluctantly. When the pants was at the last inches before it's completely off, Bucky took control and quite literally ripped it off from her.

The sudden action resulted to her body needing to hide itself from his darken eyes. Her thighs clammed together as a whine slipped from her lips. The friction of her wounds brushing against each other was burning her delicate skin.

Bucky quickly softens when he heard her pained voice, he pushed himself off from her and kneeled on the bed before her. "Doll, please..." His hands gently squeezes the side of her thighs as he pleads, "...Let me see."

Slowly spreading her thighs apart, Bucky's eyes are now focusing on the red marks on her skin. His thumbs absentmindedly traces the area around the broken skin. He was so concentrated that he didn't say a word. And that only triggered her insecurity that she started to rambled something about how she will start going in a diet and she'll add more intense leg workout in her routine.

But her voice was only a muffled strings of incoherent sounds in Bucky's ears when he finally processed everything that happened from 2 weeks ago until now.

The realization hit him like a high speed train with a broken break system. Did she really turned him down because of this? Did she really starve him out because of this? Bucky let out a growl of disapproval when he abruptly pulled her by her calves, forcing her hips to lift from the bed. She yelped in surprised but she saw the look on his face, "You..." he rasped.

Bucky placed her legs on his shoulders, letting it daggle on his back as he palmed sides of her thighs. He then, proceed to leave trails of kiss on her inner thigh, avoiding the irritating wounds on her skin, "You deprived me of my sweet little pussy because you think this..." he flattened his tongue and nibble on her softness of her inner thighs, "...would turn me off? That these thick, soft thighs that I love so much would bother me?"

He planted a delicate kiss on the marks before, "Well, guess what bunny?. You're absolute wrong. In fact, it's quite the opposite." His lips travelled upwards until it found her core. Bucky's nose flared at the scent of her arousal, "And oh my sweet babydoll, I'm going to eat your pussy until understand that. Then, I'm gonna do it some more because I am fucking starving." He pressed a firm kiss on her clothed pussy, causing the cotton to soak the juices that leaks from her hole.

"Look at that. Does your needy pussy wants some pampering too, hmm?" She could see the lust dripping down his ocean blues; the same ones that were usually bright but now were now noticeably darker.

Bucky's finger traces the slit of her pussy, rubbing her over the fabric of her panties, making patch of wetness spread even more. "Yeah? Does she want me to kiss it better? Make her feel good?"

She moaned softly to his touch, "Please."

That was all it took for Bucky to rip her panties apart as if it was made out of paper. "Fuck, there she is. My sweet pussy." He brought his fingers over, widened the folds of her pussy. Even with minimal lighting, it was enough to show him the glistening pink flesh of leaking cunt, twitching and needing his tongue to explore her insides.

He was hungry of course, just simply looking at her pussy had made his mouth water and impossible for him to resist the urge of putting his mouth on the pretty little thing. "Hmm,," a sharp cry escaped from her lips as he blew on her little twitching nub. There was this glint in his eyes as he watched her try to buck up, cunt helplessly clenching around nothing.

Before she could beg for him, Bucky's tongue dipped in between folds. Pointed at first, from the entrance of her pussy up to her clit. The tip of his tongue swirl around the aching nub. A breath caught in her throat when Bucky repeat the same move but this time he flattened his tongue.

And then he does it again and again.

Bucky, is generally the larger man compared to anyone. He is tall and beefy. But he is especially big when he's in between her legs, gently devouring her wet pussy. Slow and long licks were his favorite, it allowed him to savor the taste of her. Always so sweet and he couldn't get enough of it.

With every flick Bucky's tongue assulting to her swollen bud, she couldn’t help but pull on sheets behind her, needy moans leaves her lips every time he explored her, teases her. Her body cannot stay still when the pleasure was taking her higher. But it was not a problem for Bucky to control. Whenever she tries to close her thighs together, he stopped her. He didn't want to irritate her wounds or cause any pain, so he kept pushing her thigh open as he nuzzle his face into her pussy.

"Ahhh fuck ,, that feels so good, Bucky!" She moaned his name as the overwhelming feeling of his wet and soft tongue gliding and rubbing on her core, guiding her to heaven.

And the salacious squelching noises to fill the room as Bucky laps and sucks on her clit. She was so wet that he could just shove his fingers up in her hole but he didn't. He won't. After so many days not tasting her, he want to only use his mouth.

Though the man barely spoke during these times, he’d much rather keep his mouth occupied with drinking up her juices or suckling on her cute little clit. But when he does. Fuck. Does he spill the most unholy things.

Bucky momentarily detached himself from her and rasped, "Gonna cum, babydoll? Come on, give it to me. Let me drink and lick your cum after." His metal fingers quickly finds her clit, swiftly started to deliciously rub it; just the way he knew she liked it. It felt so good that her tongued lolled out her mouth out of pure pleasure.

"Yeah, bunny. You're gonna let me clean you up with tongue so nice, so that you can make the same mess again and again. Cum in mouth, babydoll. Cum for me"

He delved right back where is mouth belongs, licking her clit into his mouth just to wrap his lips around the pretty pink bundle of nerves sucking it harshly. She whined needily her hips started to move on its own accord, searching for more friction of his tongue, “ahh ahh! hmmmm,, s-so fucking good! ahhh,, So close!” she was seeing stars in her hazy vision from how good and dirty she felt.

Bucky's eyes almost rolled back when let out a groan of satisaction against her spread out cunt; he can feel that she was going to cum and want her to do it with his mouth latched on her.

And cum she did, moments after she couldn’t help but squeal as her back arched from the bed, grinding herself on his tongue. Bucky growled at the streams of cream squirting out of her throbbing cunt right into his mouth, down to his throat.

So sweet and warm and addictive.

While her whole body was still shaking from the aftermath of the mindblowing orgasm, Bucky continued to lick and lap on her leaking pussy, slurping and suckling every bit of cream she had blessed him with.

Yet he was still hungry.

She mewled when Bucky started to suck on her clit again and when she looked over at him, he momentarily pulled away, "oh doll, did you forget? I'm not going to stop any time soon. So just lay there, look pretty for me and let me enjoy this sweet little pussy."

End.

Read my other works here: Masterlist

A/N: Have you ever gotten your inner thighs chafed? Anyway, thanks for spending your time to reading my work! Leave your thoughts behind, I'd love to read them ♡

#bucky x reader #bucky barnes au #bucky x you #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes smut #bucky barnes fluff #bucky smut #bucky fluff #avenger!bucky #bucky x reader smut

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mellowsaturns · 1 year ago

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in losing grip, on sinking ships (you showed up just in time)

BUCKY BARNES X FEM!READER

summary: when the avengers pick up unusual activity, they realize that not all of hydra was destroyed. one unidentifiable face sends the team into a frenzy but bucky knows it. he could recognize those eyes anywhere.

warnings: heavy angst, one sided enemies-to-lovers-ish, hydra!assassin!reader, hurt/comfort, happy ending, brainwashing, trauma, guns & knives, fighting, implied kidnapping of reader when young, all the feels, misunderstandings, poor attempt at writing action

wc: 4.7k

a/n: sorry it’s been forever but i hope my fellow buckyluvrs are still here <3 i actually wrote this a long time ago but never got around to editing until recently so i guess you can say this is (from the vault) ? inspired by the idea: what-if there was another winter soldier and bucky finds himself in steve’s position this time trying to get you back to him. anyways, i hope you enjoy this one :)

Bucky’s life was a never ending montage of gunfire and bloodshed. It didn’t matter if he was under the clutches of someone else, he still lived through the wars—the lingering smell of smoke and tang of metallic forever ingrained in his senses.

And just when he thought it was finally over—a glimmer of peace at last—it comes and steals that dream away from him.

Like deja-vu, he’s looking at faces that were once responsible for his pain.

On the screen, three Hydra officers stare back at him. All faces identified by Tony’s system. Alive. Last seen in the outskirts of some small country in Europe. Irrelevant low ranking officials that had managed to survive the fall of S.H.I.E.L.D and have been hiding and secretly continuing Hydra’s mission underground ever since. Low officials or not, it was one too many.

Bucky freezes in his spot when Tony swipes the screen. The billionaire goes on a rant saying this particular face cannot be identified, which was according to Tony, bullshit because his face recognition system is the best in the world. The rest of the team is arguing and flipping through countless files and internet archives. But Bucky knows. He knows that face and those haunting eyes that he still sees in his dreams.

“Buck,” a voice calls out. “You know her, don’t you?”

He looks up at Steve from his spot, his best friend's face worried and all knowing.

One thing about Hydra was that they were always prepared. They had backups and multiple plans ready, or else how would two heads take its place when one was cut off? Unfortunately for the world, Hydra managed to make another deadly assassin, one whose work was so discreet and nimble that even intelligence didn't know they existed.

You were a ghost story that lived in the shadows of the Winter Soldier. You were another one of Hydra’s prize possessions—less known, but just as deadly.

With Steve’s comment, all eyes are now on Bucky. A pregnant pause fills the air and he gulps before he confesses, “I wasn’t the only one.”

The room becomes tense. The war that they thought was over suddenly looms over like an unpredicted oncoming storm. “Jesus Christ, Barnes. You couldn’t have informed us about her earlier?” says Tony.

“I thought,” he says, shifting his eyes onto the ground, “I thought she fell with S.H.I.E.L.D.”

Bucky couldn’t find you anywhere after he escaped their grasp. After he joined the Avengers, he tried once again secretly using Tony’s technology but it was to no avail—it always ended up being a dead end. And for that, he assumed Hydra had put you out of your misery the day they were caught.

But the face on the screen says otherwise. And suddenly, Bucky feels very guilty.

Steve clears his throat, “Well, they were picked up not too long ago heading north. If we leave now, we might be able to find them and stop them once and for all.”

Everyone looks at each other, debating on his proposal. “What the Captain said. Everybody, suit up. Quinjet leaves in ten,” says Tony.

On the jet, Bucky stares off into space but countless questions run through his mind.

Steve walks over and sits beside him. “What’s going on in that head of yours?” he asks, voice quiet.

Bucky sighs, “I just… I thought she was gone.”

“Hey, it’s not your fault. You didn’t know.”

He looks up, wondering if he should tell Steve the truth. That he’s not brooding about the fact that he concealed you to them. After a moment, Bucky speaks up. “When we get there, let me handle her. Please.”

Steve didn’t know what kind of history Bucky had with you. But judging from the look his best-friend is giving, it’s more than what Steve could understand or even comprehend but he trusts Bucky and so, he gives him a nod. “She’s all yours.”

After scouting the area and tracing the location to a very hidden underground warehouse in the middle of nowhere, they split up. The warehouse was dark and dusty, surely abandoned, but Bucky knew better—it was their facade behind the most sinister of activities. Through the comms, Natasha announces that she has already taken care of all the troops in the West wing. Moments later, Sam reports that he has eliminated one of the Hydra officers. They wouldn’t last long. Hydra didn’t have much resources or time to rebuild—their current empire was weak, they were no match for the Avengers this time.

The only person Bucky’s truly worried about is you. The fact that he trained you, made you into what you were today already gave him the chills. He’s not the Winter Soldier anymore, but he was certain that you were still in that killer mindset that Hydra forced upon you.

Step by step, Bucky walks through the quiet hallway, the echoes of his footsteps the only noise. It’s cold here, he notices, which gives him flashbacks to those days in his dirty cell and the cryostasis chamber. Down a hallway to the next, round a corner and another, there wasn’t a single soul in the eerily Eastern wing.

But he spoke too soon, because seconds later, a garrote wire was around his neck. The swift invisible steps and the perfect pressure that was being used to quickly cut off his air supply was all too familiar. He knows this move, he taught this move. You’re here, and you’re dragging him backwards.

Before all oxygen gets cut off to his brain, he jabs his elbow backwards and hits you hard on the rib which releases the hold you have on him and sends you stumbling back. Bucky takes a moment to regain his breath but you’re on your feet again. He looks at you and for a moment he freezes, then you let out a sinister grin. “Nice to see you again, Soldat,” you taunt, before running towards him.

Bucky’s deflecting your punches one after another. Maybe he’s glad he was the one who taught you everything you know because your moves were predictable—if it were another person, there is no doubt they would’ve been on the ground with multiple concussions bleeding out already. You’re ruthless when you do a triple roundhouse kick on him. On the fourth one, he manages to catch your leg and twists it, sending you to the ground with a groan.

How familiar this scene was, Bucky thinks.

Some forty-years ago, Hydra brought a woman into the training room. There was no further instruction than to train you and that’s what he did. He could tell you were well trained already—compliant and pliable. You were good. And you were just like him, injected with a serum that made you a hundred times more efficient and stronger. In just under a year, Hydra would start sending you on missions. Sometimes with him, sometimes alone.

During training, the both of you would spar for hours, leaving each other bloody and bruised, but it didn’t matter to the overlookers, the both of you would heal in a few hours anyways.

Once you pick yourself back up, he pulls a gun out on you. “Stop this,” he commands.

You smirk, “You going to shoot me, Soldat? I want to see you try.”

He clenches his jaw. You continue to look at him, a dark look on your face that shows no sign of true recognition.

His thoughts are disrupted when you tackle him onto the ground. You kick his gun away and pin his arms down as you straddle him. “I’m going to kill you,” you declare, “I’m going to put a bullet through your head.”

When he looks up at you, your eyes are full of rage. Bucky doesn’t know whether that’s the brainwashed version of you talking or the actual you talking—maybe both.

“What are you going to do after you kill me?” he says, irritated. C’mon, please recognize me. “This is all that remains of Hydra. Half the troops are already dead. One of your new leaders is dead. In a few hours, Hydra will be no more. What will you do after that? What are you going to do after you kill me?”

“What does it matter? You’re my mission. I’m going to finish it.”

He groans at your stubbornness that was identical to his Soldier persona.

He says your name slowly. “Get off. You can walk away from this.”

You frown, but he continues, “I know how you feel. You’re feeling helpless.” He clears his throat, “There’s someone behind this version of you. I want to talk to her.”

“What are you talking about?” you utter in annoyance. “Stop stalling.”

He says that name again, with calamity and care. You want to rip out his tongue.

“Let me talk to her. Please.”

“I don’t know who you’re talking about!” you shout, grabbing for the gun that’s strapped onto your waist. “Stop talkin–”

“I was in the cell next to yours. You liked the colour green. You were wearing white when we first met. You always wanted to visit Bucharest. You hated the leaky cold showers in the Siberian facility,” he rambles, trying to remember every single thing about you in a desperate attempt to get your attention so this version of you won’t shoot him in the face.

And for a moment, it works because your hand freezes on the grip of your gun. He takes that moment to flip you over, so you’re under him now, hands pinned above your head. He takes your gun and throws it behind him.

You snarl at him while trying to escape his grasp. “I know you’re under there,” he says. “Please, come through. Please talk to me.”

Your face scrunches in pain, not from him—he would never hurt you—but from the mental warfare that’s currently going on in your mind. You close your eyes as he speaks again. “Listen to my voice, you know me, don’t you? мой милая.”

My darling.

For a moment, your entire body tenses up and then you let out a painful breath. When your eyelids start to flutter open, he finally sees the eyes he came to know and rely on—eyes he came to love.

The both of you are looking at each other unblinking. A scene neither of you expected but always dreamt about.

You break the silence with a whisper of, “James?”

Bucky slowly nods at your disbelief. Finally, he thinks. But such respite doesn’t last long, because seconds later, you hook your foot under his and flip him over and escape his grasp.

There's darkness in your eyes and he can tell that the Soldate is back and the fighting resumes.

You’re chasing him down the twisting hallway and when you catch up, you grab his shoulder and throw a punch to his jaw. He stumbles back and then a voice comes through the comms.

“Just took down the second one.” Steve. “Bucky, how are you holding up? You’ve been quiet ever since we split up.”

He’s trying his best to block your hand, which now has a damn pocket knife. Your quick movements are starting to tire him out. Maybe he taught you too well, he thinks.

“Buck? Bucky. Confirm your status, right now.”

Groaning in frustration, he taps his earpiece. “I’m fine,” he grunts. A second later, “Shit!” he huffs out as you nearly slice his face.

“You don’t sound fine. Is she with you? I’m sending back up.”

“No!” he says, “Don’t send anyone. I can handle her.”

In truth, he’s struggling right now—your stamina has always been better than his—but he’s worried that you’re going to accidentally get hurt and even more agitated when people appear. His main priority was keeping you safe. Fuck the mission statement they talked about back on the Quinjet.

You’re angry—no, you’re extremely angry at him. It doesn’t take a genius to tell. It’s a mixture of pure rage from both the brainwashed and actual you.

He supposed he deserved it. You should be angry. Because for the longest time, it was you and him.

Other than turning you into a ruthless assassin just like him, an unexpected companionship also formed during those hazy in-between moments when the two of you weren’t frozen or on the metal chair getting fried by those machines—during the times when he was just Bucky and you were just you, two unfortunate innocent souls that shared the same suffering.

They weren’t pleasant moments. It was dehumanising. It was getting shoved into draughty cells with nothing but a blanket until it was time to train or time to embark on a mission. Luckily, your cells were next to each other and it made the endless nights a little more bearable. He was a little off-putting at first, but when he yelled at you to stop crying because they would torture you even more for it, you knew he meant well.

During your shared time together, glimpses of your true selves would seldom come up and you would tell each other about the little bits and pieces of a life once known. And the both of you would hold onto each other's memories and stories in case the other forgets.

And whenever they prep the two of you for the chamber due to there being no current missions for the time being, the two of you would look at each other—a look of longing with the secret squeezing of each other's hand before going under.

Despite the absolute awful situation the two of you were in at the time, the both of you were hopeful for the next shared moments together. Because even when all hope was gone, you had each other. And that was good enough for the two of you.

He misses you. So damn much.

“Shut up,” you mutter.

He didn’t even realise he said it outloud. “Well, I do,” he admits, his back hitting a wall.

“You talk too much, Soldat,” you say, creeping up on him. “I ought to cut your throat.”

“I’m sorry I left you with them.”

You halt in your steps and your jaw ticks. In a second, you pounce on him, your knife against his throat. He’s gripping your hand to stop you from continuing your job.

He says your name again. You’re pushing but he’s pushing back just as hard. “I’m sorry…” he repeats, “I’m so sorry.”

The desperation in his voice… You glance up at him slowly and he sees the pink forming in your eyes and your trembling lips. “What are you doing? What are you doing to me?” you whisper.

He sees the internal war behind your eyes once again. Bucky gulps for a moment before letting go of your hand, trusting that you won’t do any actual harm, and moves his hands so he’s cupping your face, firm enough so you’re forced to look at him. You look into his eyes for a second, then a minute, and for a moment, everything stops. Your breath hitches, because those eyes… those arctic blues… you know them. You fell in love with them many years ago.

A realisation washes over your face, one that Bucky doesn’t miss. You’re back.

The first tear falls. Then the second. “Bucky.”

“Hey, sweetheart,” he whispers.

You let out a small cry before you press the blade harder against his neck, your grip a vice from his betrayal. He could feel the sharp cold metal pierce through his skin ever so slightly, but he doesn’t try and stop you.

“Give me a reason to not kill you right now,” you grit through tears. “You left me. You left me behind to rot alone. You promised me. You fucking promised,” you say, voice laced with venom and so much hurt.

Bucky’s heart breaks at the sadness of your voice. Because he did promise. There wasn’t much to do in the cells other than throw around false hope. But whenever he told you he was going to escape one day and that he was going to take you with him—it didn’t feel like false promises at all because it wasn’t, and you knew it too.

Until he broke that promise and left you all alone.

“I didn’t mean to,” he says, voice breaking. “I didn’t mean to leave you there with them.”

“I waited for you,” you cry. “Day and night I waited for you to come back. Even when they relocated, I waited for you because I knew you’d find me.”

You remember that day clearly. Everyone was in a frenzy when the death of Alexander Pierce broke out and that they could not locate the Soldat. For a moment, you could taste your own freedom because government officials would come anytime now and finally arrest all these criminals. But right when they came, a few Hydra officers managed to escape and took you with them, and when you woke up, you didn’t know where the hell you were. But even then you didn’t lose hope because James Buchanan “Bucky” Barnes, the name you committed to memory, was going to come for you just like he promised.

Until days, months, and eventually, a year came with no sign of him.

You were angry at first, but it slowly turned into worry because what if something bad had happened to him? But what do you know? You were stuck in this building and only went out whenever they spoke those trigger words to you. And you were always under their watchful eyes, giving you no chance to even attempt an escape. Surely he would never break his promise to you so something must’ve happened to him, you told yourself multiple times.

But he was standing here right in front of you. Alive. We’re under attack, your handler said to you moments ago, Kill the Soldat before he kills you.

“You’re a liar. You never cared about me,” you hiss.

Sometimes, it got too much. But whenever reality was a bit too hard to endure, Bucky was there, always reaching his hand out to you through the metal cage, which you took and held tight. And it meant the world to you, that someone cared.

“All those moments, did it even mean anything to you?”

He uses this opportunity to pull your arms down slightly, knife finally away from his neck and his eyes start to sting from his own tears. “They meant everything to me. I care about you.”

You look up at him with a defeated expression and Bucky never wanted to punch himself in the face more. “Then why? Why didn’t you come back for me?”

“I did,” he chokes out. “When I escaped, the first thing I did was go back for you, but the facility had already been raided and there was no one there. I checked every inch of the building.”

Bucky had never felt so scared, because what if the government took you too? They would never understand—framing you as a villain even though that was far from the truth. But there was no news of your capture, so with a breath of relief, Bucky continued to look through other known Hydra facilities.

“I tried my best looking for you, but I also had to be careful because I was a wanted man at the time. When months passed by and there were no clues, I thought that maybe you had escaped. I was in Bucharest waiting for you. Remember how you said you always wanted to go there? I knew that if you escaped, you’d find me there. Even when you didn’t show, I never gave up. Steve… I think I told you about him once—he found me, he helped me and cleared my name. After that, I still searched for you but it all ended up being dead ends. And…” he pauses for a moment, “and so I thought you were dead. I should’ve tried harder. I’m sorry.”

He had mourned you and blamed himself endlessly for it.

He knows he should’ve asked for help, but instead, he took this task upon himself until it got too much—because that was the one thing he struggled with the most, asking for help.

When his side of the story finally comes to light, you break into a sob. “I don’t expect you to forgive me,” he says, “but please, drop the weapon and let me help you.”

You swallow hard at his confession. He never stopped looking for you. You didn’t even consider how hard it must’ve been for him after everything and yet you’re lashing out on him.

“How are you going to help me?” you say. “I’m a mess. All you have to do is say those words and I turn into a weapon.”

Twelve. Ember. Fragment. Nine. Academy. Order. Frigid. Yearning. Blue.

Those were your trigger words.

“I got you out of your trance, didn’t I?” he says with a gentle smile.

Hydra needed you to rebuild their empire and they relied on those nine words to do so. To them, those nine words were your greatest weakness but one of them, the last one, the one they liked to spit out in vexation, was also your greatest strength—your salvation.

Blue.

You think back, moments prior, when all he had to do was use his voice and all you had to do was look into the blues of his eyes. Hydra can repeat those words all they want, but Bucky would always be able to bring you back.

At that, your grip relaxes and the knife finally drops onto the floor, it’s noise ricocheting off the walls.

“There’s a place called Wakanda and I know someone there who can help you. Her name’s Ayo and she’s amazing. She helped me overcome my words.”

He brings his hands back up to cradle your face and you shutter at the familiar touch—at the calluses on his palms. “And I think you’ll like it there. It’s quiet and there’s so much… green.”

You let out a small laugh through your tears but doubt still fills your mind. “But… all the things I did,” you whimper, “I did such terrible unforgivable things. There’s… there’s so much blood on my hands.”

Sadness flares around his heart. It was all so familiar. He knows the feeling.

“It’s not going to be easy. God knows how long it took for me to believe that none of it was my fault. But let me be the first one to tell you,” he says, wiping your tears away with his thumb. “None of what you did was your fault. You were a victim.” He swallows a deep breath, “There are going to be days where it’ll be too much too bear and there are going to be nights where all those casualties will haunt you,” he admits. “But… but you’ll get there. Someday, you’ll learn to stop punishing yourself for something you didn’t do.”

And he vows that he’ll help you every step of the way.

You breathe out slowly, digesting all his words. “You can trust me,” he tells you, “I won’t let you down this time. I’ll be here.”

Blinking up at him, the small hesitant part of you so desperately wanted to say, “How can I trust you?” but his eyes were telling you everything you needed to know. Because it was filled with nothing but honour and truth.

He breaks away from you and reaches out his hand. An invitation. You stare at it for a while, then you slowly lift yours and brush your fingers amongst his before grabbing it tightly—a truce of sorts, a promise. He squeezes back in return, a loving smile on his face, just like all those nights many moonlights ago.

Your breath hitches when he pulls you into his embrace, your face burying perfectly into the valley of his chest. He wraps his arms around you in urgency, in fear, almost afraid you’ll slip out if he doesn’t.

“It’s over,” he mumbles into your hair.

Because two floors down an explosion erupts, finishing off the last remaining garrison of troops. Three hallways down, Natasha sets fire to a room that contained the other small red leather book that held those nine suffocating words written in Russian. Outside, the last Hydra officer attempting to flee falls to his knees from an arrow to the chest. And the only hope they had left to rebuild their regime was safely in Bucky’s arms.

He pulls away and uses his thumb to rub gently across your cheek, “It’s over. The war is finally over.”

Now that the worst is over, Bucky’s hopeful. There will be other conflicts to come, that was just how it worked, but this one, the one that held you and him underwater for years was finally over. War always took too much, but this time, it gave something back. Because among the ashes and ruins you came back to him, no more oceans in between.

“What do we do now?” you press nervously. You were taken at a young age and spent years in the Red Room before you were sold off to Hydra. Like Bucky, you’re in the wrong time period, there’s no one to go back to.

There’s so many things you could do, Bucky thinks. You can finally start living the life you deserved, the life that was taken from you too early. He’ll have to explain all this to his teammates but he knows they’ll understand. They treated him so well, there’s no doubt they’ll show the same kindness for you. Then, he’ll go with you to Wakanda, get rid of the words, maybe stay there for a while so you could heal—maybe show you the goats he took care of during his time there.

You’ll probably adjust to the 21st century better than him—you won’t need to start off with a flip phone, that’s for sure. He’ll make you listen to all the great records and watch all the movies you missed out on. There’s so many things he wanted to do with you. He knows you have no memories, no recollection. It didn’t matter, Bucky thinks, he would make new memories with you, ones worth cherishing and remembering. If you’ll have him, of course.

But first and most importantly, “Let’s get you cleaned up, okay? Then we can talk about it,” he says, rubbing the grime off your nose.

He grabs your hand and heads for the exit. But before he does, you pick up your knife from the floor and in one quick motion, you spin around and throw it. The knife embeds itself into the wall a few metres away, right next to a prying face. You stand in front of Bucky and stare at the intruder with a murderous gaze and Bucky’s heart races at the thought of you still wanting to protect him after everything.

The blond raises his arms up in surrender.

“Steve,” Bucky says from behind and you briefly recognize that name. You turn around to look at him and he meets your eyes, nodding. You relax your stance.

“Hi,” Steve says, voice slightly hoarse. “I hope I didn’t interrupt anything.”

Bucky scoffs at him, as if he wasn’t eavesdropping the whole time.

Steve looks at the both of you, then a gentle smile adorns his face. “C’mon, the rest are waiting outside for you both.”

You step forward. This is it. Freedom. A new life. Bucky notices your hesitation as you suddenly stop in your tracks. Intertwining his fingers with yours, he squeezes with reassurance. You take a deep breath, then the two of you follow Steve to the exit, leaving behind the smoke and memories of your old life.

Outside, the sun comes up slowly but surely on the horizon, painting the awakening sky a gentle warm hue of oranges and pinks.

A new beginning awaits.

#bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes angst #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes oneshot #bucky barnes imagine #bucky #bucky barnes

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sergeantbarnessdoll · 3 months ago

Note

Reader (maybe Tony’s niece?) is just making fun of Bucky.

I’m not exactly Russian around to make fun of you, but I’m Lenin you know that I’m not Stalin, either— I’m not feeling Tsar-y about these jokes— so Soviet, I guess.

Nat and Sam are impressed that she got five puns into one sentence, laughing while complimenting her comedic work.

Tony’s just like “I knew there’s a reason you’re my favorite niece!”

When everyone else leaves the room, Bucky leans over and lets her know that there will be a discussion (correction) of such behavior

To Be Corrected » Bucky Barnes/Winter Soldier

Pairings: Avenger!Bucky Barnes x Female!Reader, Tony Stark x Niece!Reader with the Avengers

Summary: You don’t know how to speak Russian, but you try to make fun of Bucky.

Warnings: Fluff, tiny bit of implied Smut (18+), language, pet names

A/N: Thank you to the lovely anonymous person who requested this🩵

Written on my phone. My apologies for any mistakes.

Header made by @buckys-wintersoldier

GIF IS NOT MINE! Credit goes to the creator.

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!!🔞

“Everyone this is my niece Y/N. She’s thinking about becoming an Avenger and will be sitting in today’s meeting.” Tony says, introducing you the Avengers.

“Hi.” You say politely, waving at everyone.

“Take a seat anywhere, munchkin.” He says, patting your shoulder.

You looked around the table for an open seat, finding one next to Bucky. You smiled and sat down in the chair next to him.

“Hi.” You whispered to Bucky.

“Hi.” Bucky whispers back.

“What’s your name?” You asked.

“Bucky.” He answers.

“Nice to meet you, Bucky.” You whispered and smiled.

“Barnes, stop flirting with my niece.” Tony says.

Bucky rolled his eyes at him and you giggled. As you sat in the meeting with the Avengers for their upcoming mission, you understood some things, but not everything. After the meeting, you looked over the Avengers Compound and found yourself in the lounge room. Bucky, Steve, Sam, Tony, and Natasha were in there.

“Hi.” You say, walking further in the room.

“Hi.” They say.

“What do you think so far?” Steve asks.

“I love it!” You tell him.

“Does that mean you’re joining us?” Natasha asks.

You opened your mouth to answer her, but Bucky interrupted you before you could say anything.

“I didn’t know we were hiring 13 year olds.” Bucky jokingly says.

“Bucky, be nice to her.” Steve says to him.

You narrowed your eyes at Bucky, smirking to yourself when you came up with a good comeback.

“You speak Russian, right, Bucky?” You asked.

“Yes. Why?” He asks.

“I’m not exactly Russian around to make fun of you, but I’m Lenin you know that I’m not Stalin, either— I’m not feeling Tsar-y about these jokes— so Soviet, I guess.” You say.

Bucky’s jaw dropped at your comeback. Steve was trying not to laugh. Natasha and Sam high fived each other and laughed at your comeback to Bucky.

“You’re my new favorite person.” Sam says.

“You’re definitely my new best friend and I’m most definitely teaching you more Russian terms.” Natasha says.

“This is why you’re my favorite niece!” Tony says proudly.

Bucky finally chuckles and smirks at you, shaking his head at your comeback. After a while, everyone left the room, leaving you and Bucky alone. You sat down next to him.

“You think you’re funny, don’t you, doll face?” Bucky asks, leaning over towards you.

“I know my way around jokes. So yes, I do.” You say, smiling proudly.

“Just know, there will be a discussion for your behavior.” He says in your ear.

“Name the time and place and I’ll be there, Bucky.” You say seductively.

Bucky was about to kiss you, but a voice over the intercom interrupted you two before his lips met yours.

“Sergeant Barnes.” The voice over the intercom starts. “Mr. Stark told me to advise you to not put the sexual moves on his niece.” It said.

Bucky groans loudly, dropping his head against your shoulder, making you giggle.

“My room. Tonight.” Bucky whispers in your ear, sending a shiver through your body.

“I’ll be there, Sarge.” You say seductively.

🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖

-Bucky’s Doll

330 notes · View notes

buckybabesonly · 2 years ago

Text

Nothing Breaks Like A Heart

Summary: You finally confess your feelings to Bucky, hoping he might like you back. He turns you down.

Pairing: Bucky x Female!Avenger!reader

Genre: Angst, fluff

Warnings: Mentions of heavy drinking, no other significant warnings really without spoiling the plot 🤫

Word count: 6.5k

A/N: If you enjoyed this one, please do leave a comment / feedback / reblog! ❤️

Loving Bucky was like drinking honey. It was warm and comforting, sweet and overwhelming for your senses. You looked forward to seeing his face everyday and adored hearing him laugh, his whole face creasing when he doubled over at something funny you had said.

He had become an unlikely close ally since you joined the team. More than just a colleague. The time you’d spent together in the last year had been a defining period for you, as you had really grown to treasure his presence in your life.

God, the way this man made you feel. You didn’t think you’d ever be lucky enough to meet someone who would make you so happy.

It would be even better if you actually had the gall to tell him how you felt.

Being emotionally vulnerable was difficult. You wanted more, but it was scary. However, you recalled a piece of advice that one of your college professors had told you years ago, wise words which stuck with you. If you never try, the answer will always be no.

You had it set in your mind that you were going to tell him. You were, but maybe not today. You would wait for tomorrow. Or the day after that. Or the day after that.

Your inner turmoil was frustrating. You fought androids and aliens and god knows what else, but you were afraid of this?

It could mess everything up, you reasoned. If he didn’t return your feelings, then you would make everything awkward, and maybe you would lose him even as a friend. You didn't know if you could handle that.

Despite this, a tiny hopeful voice in your head told you that Bucky felt the same about you. The way he always looked for a reason to spend time with you, how he shared his deepest secrets with you. The way you always partnered up on missions, and how you always had each other's backs. The way he comforted you when you were sad, allowing you to cry on his chest, soothing fingers stroking your hair.

When you first joined the team, he had been the first one to properly befriend you. Your first encounter was in the kitchen, where you had ended up in the middle of the night after being unable to sleep.

You were shocked to see Bucky propped up on a breakfast stool at the kitchen island, book in hand. You had waved nervously at him, going over to the fridge to get a carton of chocolate milk.

“Can’t sleep?” he grunted. You glanced to see what it was reading, seeing 'The Hobbit' embossed in gold letters across a hardback cover.

“Yeah,” you said softly, tugging down at the hem of your sleep shirt. You hadn’t exchanged many words with him at this point, but he seemed friendly enough. “You want a glass?”

He contemplated for a second before he nodded. “Sure.”

You ended up sitting opposite each other, glasses of chocolate milk in hand.

“How come you’re awake?”

Bucky smiled wryly. “I have trouble sleeping.”

“Nightmares?”

“Something like that.”

You hummed to yourself, taking a sip of the sweet beverage. There was something childish but comforting about chocolate milk - you always used to have it with your mom when you were small.

“How you feeling?” Bucky asked, breaking the silence. “Settling in?”

You nodded, the grip around your glass tightening. “Yeah, kind of. Everyone’s nice.”

Bucky seemed to know that you wanted to say more, silently promoting you with his eyes to continue.

“Everybody seems very tight knit - I guess that makes me a bit nervous? Trying to fit in.” You looked down, chewing on your lower lip. "I've always had a bit of trouble with that."

“I get you,” Bucky said, eyes still observing you. They were the color of cobalt - stunning. “Don’t worry. I think you’ll do just fine.”

That was the first meeting, and since then, you had only grown closer to him. Your mid-night conversations were a frequent occurrence. At least once or twice a week, you’d find each other in the kitchen at ungodly hours. Over time, you had introduced other activities to pass the time - board games, watching TV shows, fun idle gossip. Each time, you were always accompanied by chocolate milk.

“My mom died when I was six,” you had told Bucky during one of your late night rendezvous, half a year into your time with the team. “I don’t have many memories of her, but I remember that whenever I was sick or sad, she would have chocolate milk with me. It always cheered me up.”

You exchanged nuggets of information about each others pasts, and soon, you were sure that Bucky knew enough about you to write your biography. You felt surprisingly fine, opening up to him about anything and everything.

The seasons passed in a flash, and it was suddenly the one year anniversary of your joining the team. You found Bucky in the kitchen once again, at 3AM on a Thursday. You had a smile ready on your face, though your limbs ached. They were littered with bruises and cuts from your latest mission, but seeing him put a bounce in your step.

Bucky was staring down at his phone, the glow illuminating his face in the semi-darkness. It was chiming loudly with notifications, his expression unreadable.

“What’s that?” you asked, making your presence known.

Bucky already had a glass of milk out for you. He placed his phone down, grimacing.

“Sam got me doing this online dating thing,” he said casually. Your smile fell, unable to hide your surprise. “Modern dating is kind of crazy. Women are so much bolder than in the 40s."

Online dating? What?

“I didn’t know you started online dating,” you said, trying to keep your voice light. You didn’t even know Bucky was Iooking to date. You were deflated - any hopes that Bucky returned your crush were promptly dashed. You tried to swallow your disappointment.

“I wasn’t, really,” he said. “I guess it’s not the worst idea, though.”

Damn you, Sam Wilson, you thought.

“You meet women in real life all the time,” you said, taking your usual seat across him. “No one catch your interest?” You played nonchalantly with your fingers, trying not to pick your nails - a nervous habit.

Bucky pursed his lips, eyes landing on you for a moment before he looked at the ceiling.

“Ah, I don’t know.”

“You met anyone nice so far?” you probed, your jealousy spiking.

“Early days,” he responded. He slid his phone across the surface of the island, showing you the dating app he had open. The girls were plentiful, all beautiful and clearly enthusiastic. Bucky’s inbox was full of flirtatious greetings, but you noticed he hadn’t yet responded to a single one.

“Hmm.” You struggled to keep your face neutral. You felt the sinking realization that he must have never thought of you that way. Otherwise, why would he be looking for someone when you were right there?

You couldn't focus properly on the conversation anymore, your mind racing as Bucky moved the topic onto something unrelated.

Fantasising about Bucky had been dangerous. You had spent so much time imagining the day you would finally confess, and he would reciprocate your feelings and you would have the happy relationship you yearned for. Even if you didn’t confess first, you were hoping he would.

Up until now, you had sometimes told yourself that Bucky was just being patient. That he was old-fashioned, so he was taking his time in courting you.

You realized now that you were simply never considered an option.

The next few weeks were torturous. Christmas was fast-approaching, but you were far from being in the festive mood. You had to put on a front with Bucky now, pretend everything was alright and not feel too tempted to ask about the progress of his dating life. Things were tough, and you were feeling unhappier day by day.

You had always known, deep down, that your feelings for him were more than just a crush, and had been for many months. It ached, the feeling of knowing your emotions were not returned.

One horrible part of you wondered why. Were you not sexy enough? Not smart enough? Not charming enough?

Maybe all of the above.

Seeing Bucky nowadays made you ache. You found yourself feeling sad whenever he cracked jokes with you, shared his thoughts with you, when the backs of his hands brushed against yours as you walked side by side.

He would find someone that he actually wanted to be with, to do all that and more. It wasn’t his fault, and you knew he had no idea that you were in so much pain, that he had single handedly eviscerated you.

Tony's Christmas party was a perfect opportunity to drown your sorrows. So cliché. You knew it was a bad idea, but that didn't stop you knocking back drink after drink by the bar, ignoring Natasha's requests to dance. After all, if all the Hollywood rom-coms you had watched were any indication, this was one of the key steps to getting over a guy.

The party was kicking off, and the room was spinning like a ride at a fairground. Your alcohol tolerance had always been low, and now you were paying for your actions. Your skin was burning hot and prickling, and you were struggling to walk straight. Although, this was exactly what you wanted - it was somehow cathartic, purging you of all the pent of frustration inside.

A dark figure appeared in your eye line. Your vision refocused until you realized who it was - your favorite, handsome face was looking very annoyed right now, mouth set in a firm line.

“You’re drunk,” Bucky stated, his voice filled with annoyance.

“Duh.”

“I’m taking you back to your room,” he said, his hand latching around your bicep.

“No,” you said indignantly, jerking away. Your face blanched at the sudden movement. “I don’t feel well."

Bucky rolled his eyes, opting to steer you towards the balcony instead for some fresh air. He shut the French doors behind you, allowing the silent night air to consume you, isolating the two of you from the crowd.

“Sit,” he said, gently helping you down onto a wrought iron bench. “What were you thinking? You know you can’t drink.”

“I know.”

“Something wrong?” Bucky knew that the answer was yes - there was no other reason for you to be drinking unless you were upset or mad.

“I wanted to forget,” you croaked, leaning your head back to get a proper look at him. The sight of him devastated you. He looked so beautiful, so far out of your reach.

“Forget what?”

You stared up at the ink black sky, at the stars. The night air was cool against your burning skin. Everything was quiet, save the sound of his breathing in your ear as he leaned close to you. In that intoxicated moment, you thought you had nothing to lose, forgetting that Bucky was truly your everything.

“How much I love you,” you whispered, tilting your head to look at him through beseeching eyes.

Bucky sucked in a breath of air. His entire stance became rigid at your words. The way you stared at him imploringly confirmed that he hadn’t misheard.

“How long?” He was frowning even as you gave him a trembling, sad smile.

“A long time.”

He raised his hand as if he wanted to touch you, but settled it back down on his thigh. Your face crumpled at his obvious discomfort.

“I don’t know what to say,” he breathed.

Those words alone were enough to make your throat tighten and the needles in your chest multiply ten-fold.

“Tell me you feel the same way,” you said suddenly. It was a plead. You hated how desperate you were in this moment, but you needed him to know how you felt, and you needed to know whether you had a chance. Call it liquid courage, but you felt like you had nothing to lose when you grasped one of his calloused hands in yours.

Bucky was silent for a long time, staring at you with sadness and regret in his eyes. You hated how uncomfortable you must’ve been making him. God, what were you thinking, burdening him with your feelings and putting him in this position? You scolded yourself mentally, feeling nauseous.

Your hand was tight around his, your knuckles white. With every silent second that passed, your fingers loosened, falling limp. His hand was warm, yet you had never felt so cold.

He pulled his hand free, clenching it into a fist.

“I’m sorry,” he said finally. Each word was a knife sinking into your chest. The realization hit you suddenly, thick and sour.

You felt bile rise in your throat. You stood up then, the floor shaking beneath you. You almost collapsed.

“Be careful - ”

“Oh god,” you whispered, squeezing your eyes shut. “I’m sorry. I need to go.”

You darted away with surprising speed, wrenching the doors open and hurrying back inside the room. You ignored the sounds of him calling you as you rushed through the crowd, trying to put one foot steadily in front of you and praying you wouldn’t fall.

Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Don’t cry.

You held the tears in until you returned to your bedroom, slamming the door shut. You bolted into the en-suite and fell onto your knees in front of the toilet, the acid in your throat finally seeing the surface as you vomited.

Your stomach heaved, emptying yourself of all its contents. But you couldn’t get rid of the horrible, cloying feeling in your gut that came with Bucky’s rejection.

You fell asleep on the bathroom floor, tear tracks on your face and fresh wound in your heart.

You were dreading seeing him the next morning. Thankfully, you arrived in the conference room before he did. The others were there already, gathered around the table. Sam took one look at you and snickered. You were dressed in black, hair in disarray and a pair of large sunglasses on your face.

“Someone had a bit too much fun last night,” he sang.

You grimaced, closing your eyes at the way his voice boomed in your overly sensitive ears. “Stop shouting,” you croaked.

Bucky entered a few minutes later. You kept your head down, refusing to look at him or otherwise acknowledge his presence. To the others, your hostility could be passed off as a result of your clear hangover. But the excruciating humiliation of your confession to him hung between the two of you, making you squirm in your seat.

You didn’t speak for the rest of the meeting, keeping your sunglasses on and staring stoically at Steve as he delivered the mission briefing. As soon as he dismissed the team, you jogged out of the room, but was accosted by Bucky in the hallway.

“Can we talk?” he asked loudly.

You didn’t want to make a scene. You put a fake smile on.

“Sure.” Your eyes were still swollen behind your dark shades as you tried not to let the sight of him bring out any more tears.

He led you into an empty room a few doors down. His face was set like stone, only the slightest crease in his forehead hinting at something akin to distress.

“I’m sorry if I hurt your feelings,” he said carefully.

“It’s okay.” You winced in discomfort, even just the sound of your own voice bringing you pain. You wondered if he had rehearsed a speech, to let you down easy.

“You should never drink that much again.” His voice was sharp, critical.

“I can take care of myself,” you said, taken aback by his tone.

“It’s not worth it,” he said, his attitude easing up. “I’m not worth it. I don’t want you to feel this way because of me."

You felt your shoulders sag. You felt so tired, defeated.

"I can't control the way I feel," you whispered.

Bucky kept a reasonable distance between the two of you, like he was afraid to go near you now that the pair of you were alone. You wished you could read his mind, know what he was thinking.

His next words were chilling. "You’re my friend, and I care a lot about you.”

The emphasis on the word ‘friend’ didn’t go unnoticed. The way he looked at you was orchestrated, pointed. He was letting you know, in no uncertain terms, what he wanted to say. You were almost grateful that he didn’t directly bring up how you had told him you loved him, as if to save you your last shred of dignity.

He stared at you now with such intensity, the meaning clear in the way he looked at you. We are just friends.

He was doing you a favour. Still, your heart shattered. Your hands were shaking. There it was again - that awful, stinging pain of rejection.

“Okay,” you said faintly.

“I'm sorry if I ever made you think that we could be anything more," he began. Tears gathered in the corners of your eyes.

“Let’s not do this,” you interrupted. If he kept speaking, you felt like you might die. You wished the ground would swallow you up.

Bucky licked his lips but remained silent.

“Please..." You hated how your voice shook. "I would really appreciate it if we could just move on. Let’s not bring this up again. It would really help me.”

Bucky folded his arms tightly across his chest, nodding stiffly.

“Okay.”

You backed away from him, grateful your eyes were hidden. You left the room and didn’t look back.

You managed to act normal around Bucky. Well, semi-normal. The rest of the team didn't even seem to notice anything was amiss - you still spoke to Bucky, managed to look at him as if the very sight didn't break your heart, kept a smile on your face.

But that was in front of them. For anything else which wasn't out of necessity or mission-related, you avoided interacting with him. When you woke up in the middle of the night, you no longer plodded into the kitchen, instead staying in your bed, sobbing and staring at the ceiling.

You no longer laughed and joked with him. You turned your attention to the others instead, talking to Steve and Clint and Natasha and whoever else was there, in a desperate attempt to hide the fact that you were trying to keep it together. You wanted to keep your mind distracted.

It was horrible.

Things would not be the same again, at least not for a little while. You needed time to make yourself get over him.

It was easier, when Bucky returned to the compound one night with a blonde on his arm. She was giggling and clinging onto him, and your heart sank when they stumbled into the elevator just as you were making your way to your floor.

You couldn't have been more shocked at the sight of them. Bucky had red prints all over his cheeks, and her lipstick was smeared. The smell of alcohol was in the air.

"You're not supposed to have civilians in here," was the only thing you managed to say, shock infiltrating your system. The blonde giggled.

"Oops."

Bucky only shrugged, his hand slipping into hers as the elevator rose. Your heart clenched.

He was doing this on purpose. He wanted to show you that he had no interest in you, leave you without any doubts. You didn’t know that Bucky had it in him, to be so cruel. If you weren't trying to hold back your tears, you would've almost felt impressed by his antics. The worst thing was, you truly understood why he was doing this.

You think you may have hated him in that moment.

The elevator doors dinged open, and you stumbled out. Tears began prickling in your eyes, and you were sure Bucky could see.

You didn't say anything as you marched to your room, the elevator doors sliding shut.

You had always been good at pretending. Pretending you were happy when you weren't, pretending you were calm when you were furious, pretending you knew the answer when you didn't.

Bucky saw past a lot of that. He could tell when you were lying, could see when you were holding back. He read you like an open book.

He was important to you, and still would be even if he had rejected your confession and rubbed the presence of another girl in your face. You told yourself that it was a good thing - he was performing a service, encouraging you to move on. Besides, he didn't owe you a thing. He could do whatever he wanted with anyone else.

You couldn't lie convincingly to yourself.

Bucky's birthday rolled around all too quickly. You had it marked in your calendar, though you would've remembered even without the reminder.

Despite your conflicted feelings, you wanted to get him a gift. You had planned the perfect one months ago and had enlisted Bruce's help in finding it. You still wanted to see the look on his face when he opened it.

Bucky roamed the hallways on your floor the morning of his birthday, frowning slightly when your bedroom door opened, Bruce appearing in the frame. He caught a glimpse of where you were perched on your bed, face flushed in mild excitement.

Bucky gave Bruce a smile which may have looked more like a grimace, the latter giving him a polite nod before continuing on. Your door swung inwards, but Bucky stuck a hand between it and the frame, poking his head through.

"What's that all about?" he asked, curiosity getting the better of him.

You shuffled something behind your back. You hadn't spoken to Bucky much as of late, barely acknowledging any of the awkward encounters that had occurred in the past months, instead choosing to face him with a professional-politeness.

"Nothing," you said, not particularly aware of what it would look like to have Bruce emerge from your bedroom.

"Is something going on between you two?" he asked directly. He gave a laugh void of humor, the sound escaping him in a huff. "Do you have a thing for emotionally damaged men?" He gestured to himself with his vibranium arm.

The small smile on your lips fell. Anger simmered in your eyes.

How could he? How could he reduce his feelings for you to nothing and stomp on them like it was trash?

You stood and marched towards him, a wave of fury overcoming you, thrusting a wrapped parcel into his hands.

"He helped me get your present, actually. Happy birthday," you spat, watching as Bucky's mouth fell open silently. You pushed past him, unable to look him in the eyes, feeling your stomach twist.

Bucky remained rooted to the spot, fiddling with the wrapping paper hesitantly before he ripped it open.

It was a first edition copy of 'The Grapes of Wrath', excellent condition. The subject of Bucky's favorite books came up after your first encounter when you saw him reading 'The Hobbit'.

"Is it about angry grapes?" you had asked, confused when Bucky laughed. He promised he would buy it and lend you the book one day.

Bucky's ground his teeth, every cell in his body telling him to go after you. But, for all the reasons he had told himself since the day of your confession, he made himself stay put.

Bucky had missed out on a lot in his life since falling off that train in the Austrian Alps. His whole trajectory had changed, and instead of growing old in his century, he found himself in the 21st, thrust into the modern world and navigating his new life.

He always thought, back in the 40s, that he would meet a nice girl and settle down after the war. He would live in a cozy, tiny home and have three kids, maybe four.

He missed out on that and more - though he had been quite the playboy back in his time, he had never experienced true love. He had never met that one woman he would die for.

Bucky had commented off-hand once on how lucky Steve was to meet Peggy before he went into the ice. Steve had reminisced on that with a bittersweet smile, before telling him, you’ll find your Peggy.

Falling in love with you had blindsided him. At first, he viewed you as a friend, a sweet girl who he grew to trust.

Then, he realized that he was slowly being drawn to you, like magnets he couldn’t pull apart. He realized that everything you did was endearing, that you occupied his thought space all the time, that having you around helped him feel comfortable, safe.

You were young, determined, and so innocent. You were somebody who deserved someone as pure and good as you. You weren’t his Peggy - you were something more, so unique and unapologetically you, and he wanted you as his person so badly.

But you deserved someone good. Somebody like Steve, who stood for the best values and only acted for the good of mankind. Not someone morally-gray and jaded like Bucky.

He wanted someone to spend his life with, for sure. If he couldn’t have his idyllic life in the post-war period, then he still wanted to find a partner in this new, still-unfamiliar time.

You fit that profile. He wanted you.

But he would never forgive himself if he weighed you down with his sins.

When you told him you loved him, his heart had broke. He wanted to tell you how much he valued you, how he dreamed of kissing you. He wanted to be a part of your happy ending.

But how much of a happy ending could he really give you? Could he give you children, knowing they would always be in danger from his enemies? Could he give you a wedded, domestic life, when all he knew was how to fight and cause pain?

He had to make his sacrifice for the greater good. Even if he had to crush you, he had to do it.

Someone like Bucky wasn’t supposed to get happy endings. You were, but just not with him.

You couldn't stand to be around him anymore. It was affecting your concentration, your work. It reached a breaking point two weeks after Bucky's birthday, when you requested to speak to Steve privately.

"You want to leave?" he asked, his face appalled.

You nodded curtly. "You’ll still be able to contact me, if you really need me. But I don't think I can stay here anymore."

Steve didn't look as confused at your profession as you expected.

"Is this about Bucky?"

You cringed. God, did he know about everything that happened?

"I don't know what's going on between the two of you," he clarified quickly, "but I can see that something happened. He's not the same, either."

"I'm not in a good place right now," you admitted shamefully. "I'm not saying that this is goodbye forever, Steve. But for my own sanity, I think I need a break."

Steve heaved a sigh. "I know you wouldn't ask unless you really needed it. And you don't need my permission, you know."

"I know," you said, giving him a small smile. "But I just wanted to let you know that I'll be here whenever the team needs it. Emergencies only," you joked. "But for now I think I'll get out of here. Maybe go upstate."

"Have you told him?"

"Don't need to," you said, defensiveness creeping into your voice.

"I think he would like to know."

“We’re not really on speaking terms,” you said bluntly.

Steve clasped a heavy hand on your shoulder. He knew better than to argue. He was sure you’d figure things out for yourself, anyway. “I’ll miss you.”

Now that you had completed the professional courtesy, you decided that you would leave in a few days. You still had some matters to wrap up, and to say goodbye to your teammates. You loved them, and they deserved a proper farewell.

"This isn't goodbye," Nat had said sternly, pulling you into a tight hug. Her voice was quiet and soft in your ear as she whispered, "If you need me, I'll be there."

You squeezed her tight, threatening to tear up. "Thank you."

"Keep your ass out of trouble," Clint had said, winking at you. “And check in with us now and again, yeah?”

Sam was clearly unhappy about everything. And he definitely noticed that you had picked a day to make your announcement when Bucky was conveniently away from the compound.

"Am I gonna see you again?" he asked, raising his eyebrows after you'd embraced.

"Couldn't get rid of me if you tried," you promised, punching his arm.

You retired to your bedroom that night, sure that Bucky would hear the news later after he came back. You kept your phone switched off and door locked for the rest of the evening, making sure the your belongings were packed.

Just past midnight, you crept out of your room, duffel bag over your shoulder. You made your way through the compound, down the floors into the underground garage. Bucky's motorbike wasn't there - he still hadn't returned.

You were grateful. You climbed into your car, and tossed your belongings in the back. You had to stop thinking about him - if you let yourself do it for too long, you were afraid you wouldn’t be able to go.

With a heavy heart, you left this chapter of your life behind.

Your phone rang for days afterwards. Missed calls, voicemails left unanswered, texts left unread.

You couldn't bear to face him. If you pretended he didn't exist, maybe it would ease the pain.

You didn't know where you were driving to. You simply knew you had to get as far away as possible, clear your head. You were at a crossroads, and you needed to pull yourself together, but for now you would allow yourself to wallow.

You had been spending each night in a different motel. Wake up, drive, sleep. Wake up, drive, sleep. You wanted to put as much distance between yourself and Bucky Barnes as possible.

You had no idea how you had gotten everything so wrong. Did you really misinterpret the signals? Was every intimate moment between the two of you simply platonic?

You didn't want to feel so beat up over a guy, but he wasn't just any guy. He was the first man you had ever loved.

Life was funny, sometimes. You supposed that you couldn't always expect happy endings.

You kicked open the door of the latest motel, a bag of takeout in your hands. You noticed the dark, shadowy figure on your bed in an instant, your hand sliding to the dagger sheathed in your belt on reflex. Before your brain even had time to catch up with what you were seeing, you had aimed and launched it, shocked when a familiar voice rang out.

"Calm down, tiger," he rasped. The bedside light flicked on, and Bucky was suddenly there, twirling your dagger between his fingers. He tossed it to the side, letting it land on the carpet with a soft thud.

A week had passed since you last saw him. Seeing him sent an electrifying jolt straight through your core.

"What are you doing here?" you asked. You were shocked, but your first thought was that something terrible had happened. "Is it the team? Are they in danger?"

Bucky looked irate, his jaw clenching and unclenching. His hands were knotted together, worry hiding beneath his anger.

"I've been calling you for days. You left without saying goodbye. Hell, you left without saying anything." His voice was gruff and accusatory.

That gave you the answer you needed. The team were fine, and he was simply here to rant. You felt the initial shock of his appearance wear off.

He stood up and stepped towards you, and that was when you noticed the state he was in. His usually close shaven beard was slightly unkempt, and his eyes were bloodshot. He looked worn out.

"Yeah," you retorted, "I kind of did that on purpose."

"Why?" His voice was a whisper. "Why would you do that?"

You were exasperated. You did not envision yourself having to explain your decisions to him. His appearance both delighted and depressed you. It was tiring, having these two sides battle each other whenever you saw him. Your love for him versus his heavy rejection.

"I can't be around you anymore," you admitted, your voice tight. "I thought I could, but I can't."

"Why the hell not?" he pressed stubbornly.

"You know why!" you cried out. "Why are you doing this to me, Bucky? I told you I loved you and, okay, you don't love me. Fair enough," you said, frustrated. "But to go out of your way to hurt me? Remind me that I'm nothing more than a friend? Bring other girls back to the compound so you can fuck them?"

Bucky flinched. "I never - "

"No!" you shouted, cutting him off. "You don't get to do this, Bucky." You felt wetness on your cheeks, and realized you were crying. It only made you more exasperated. "You don't get to tear my heart out of my chest and come here when I've been trying to get away from you."

He stormed up to you, hands reaching for you, but you batted him away.

"Don't!" Your hand hit his chest, barely moving him an inch. "Just stop! Please!" Your voice broke, and you shook with tears. The dam had broke, and seeing him here was just too much.

"Please don't cry," he pleaded, his face anguished.

"What are you doing here?" you asked, your voice breaking. "What do you want from me?"

Bucky looked so upset, taking another step forward, but you walked backwards until you hit the door.

"You don't want me," you exclaimed through your tears. You needed him to understand how much pain you were in just by seeing him. "You can't be here, Bucky. I can't look at you and remember how you just don't love me back."

Bucky pulled you into his arms, tightening them when you struggled. He was stronger than you - you had no choice but to become a prisoner against his chest. You were crying as you had many times before in his hold, but this time it felt different. Your heart was pounding and you were aching, wanting to melt into him but also aware of the anger and sadness flaring within you. It was torture.

"It hurts too much," you managed to get out through your wailing sobs.

He didn't say anything until you stilled. He let you cry, your tears soaking through his shirt. Your quiet sniffs and hiccups accompanied his words when he finally spoke.

"You weren't supposed to appear in my life," he said, his voice tense. "You weren't supposed to be so wonderful, so comforting. You made me feel so safe."

You didn't say anything, confusion rendering you temporarily speechless.

"I thought I was fine on my own. I've been a soldier all my life, just focusing on fighting everyone else's battles. And then I met you."

You had no idea where this was going as Bucky's arms seemed to tighten all the more around you.

"It felt...strange, how I wanted to kiss you. How I wanted you there, next to me, all the time.”

You looked up at Bucky, really taking in his exhausted eyes, his chapped lips, the way he was looking at you now with an exquisite softness.

"I felt like I was doing something wrong. I thought - I don't want to - ruin you," he said. "You are so young and have your whole future ahead of you and I didn't want to bring you down with all of me. My history, my demons, my baggage. And I ended up hurting you."

A spark of hope appeared, wanting to ignite into a flame. You expelled a shaky breath.

"Do you love me?" you asked, your fingers digging into his shoulders as he continued to hold you.

He nodded, his words like velvet. "How could I not? Of course I love you."

Of course, he said. But your insecurities prevailed, and you shook your head.

"You did a good job of hiding it," you said sadly.

Bucky closed his eyes regretfully.

"I know. I don't know what I was thinking. I thought if I could push you away, make you fall out of love with me, you would find someone worthy."

"What makes you think you're not worthy?" you retorted.

"Some days, I feel like no amount of good deeds I do can redeem me," he murmured.

"Bucky," you said slowly. "You're one of the best men I've ever known. Your heart is so kind."

"I'm sorry." He grasped one of your hands, brought it to his lips, kissing the back of your hand. "I'm sorry I hurt you. Part of me thought you would shrug, get over it and find someone else."

Your smile was full of sorrow. "Then you have no idea how much you truly mean to me.

Bucky cupped the side of your face. Seeing you in this state had truly been a wake up call for him. When he found out you had left the compound, all his resolve had crumbled. He realized that he had hurt you so deeply that you couldn’t physically be around him. That was when he knew that the connection between the two of you was too rare to let it slip, when he felt an immense pain at the idea of never seeing you again.

Having you in front of him now was heartbreaking. Your eyes were puffy, and you looked tired and so frail. He loved you, and you were supposed to take care of the people you loved. He swore on his life that he would dedicate himself to showing you what you really meant to him.

"When you asked me what I'm doing here," Bucky said, a hopeful smile on his face, "It's to tell you that I love you, so much. And I'm here to take you home."

You nodded, fresh tears filling your eyes, except this time they were borne from happiness.

"Let's go."

He had already packed your belongings for you, you realized when he released you to hoist your bags over his shoulder, which he had placed by the door. He paused, slipping his hand into his pocket and placing a tiny kid-sized carton into your hand. "Almost forgot. For the journey."

Chocolate milk.

You threw your arms around him, jumping to hook your legs around his hips. He dropped your bags as you kissed him, his hands reaching to support your thighs as he returned it with equal passion.

"This room is paid for," you gasped into his mouth. "Let's go back tomorrow."

He was silent when he walked back to fall onto the bed with you on top of him, his mouth never once leaving yours.

#bucky x reader #bucky x you #bucky barnes #bucky x female reader #bucky angst #bucky fic #james buchanan barnes #bucky oneshot #bucky fanfic

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literaryavenger · 1 year ago

Text

I love you and I hate it

Summary: Bucky's your best friend, but you're in love with him. Now that he has a girlfriend, will you be able to get a handle on your feelings?

Pairing: Best Friend!Bucky Barnes x Female!Reader

Warnings: Bucky being a bit of an ass. Reader being dramatic. Angst. Language maybe. Minimal use of Y/N. My poor attempts at being funny.

Word Count: 2.7K

A/N: this is a two part because otherwise it was too long. Hope you like it! also, it's 4:30am and I can't help myself lol.

Masterlist

Loving your best friend is not something anyone ever plans.

Getting those kinds of feelings for the person closest to you changes the way you look at them, the way you interact and essentially your relationship with them, making everything unnecessarily complicated.

At least that’s how you see it.

You definitely didn't think something like that could ever happen to you. But to be fair, you also never thought Bucky Barnes would ever become your best friend at the compound.

When you first arrived as the newest avengers recruit the brooding supersoldier was not your biggest fan. Things didn’t start on the best note for you two.

- 2 years ago -

Steve was showing you around the compound and introducing you to people and team members as you met them. You arrived at the common room where Bucky and Sam were watching Tv.

"Hey guys. This is Y/N, the new recruit I told you about," Steve introduced you "this is Sam." he said to you as Sam got up from the couch putting out his hand.

"Nice to meet you." he said.

"You too," you said, shaking his hand "it’s so exciting to be here and meet all of you. You are all such remarkable people."

"Oh, complimenting me? I like you already." Sam said chuckling.

"Of course you do." Steve said, rolling his eyes with a smile, then turned to you "and this is Bucky" he said, pointing at the brunette still sitting on the couch.

"Hi Bucky, it’s nice to meet you too." you said, getting closer to him and holding out your hand for him to shake. Bucky, however, just looked at you for a moment before standing up, turning away from you and walking out of the room without saying a word.

"Uh... did I do something wrong?" you asked, very much confused, still looking at the door Bucky just ran out of.

"No, it’s always him." said Sam.

"Sam, don’t." Steve told him, then turned to you again "don’t mind Bucky, he’s not good with new people. It’s nothing personal, he’ll get used to it, don’t worry."

"Right. He’ll get used to me." you said as he gave you an apologetic look "yeah… anyway, let’s finish the tour."

"Sure, bye Sam. See you around, I guess." you told Sam with a smile.

"Yeah, see you guys at dinner." and with that you left to finish the tour of the compound that ultimately ended with your assigned room.

"So this is your room, Natasha has the room on the right and Sam has the one on the left." he pointed at them as he talked and then pointed at the room across from yours "that's Bucky, to his right is Peter and mine is to his left."

"A lot of neighbors, got it." you said chuckling with Steve.

"Yeah. So I’ll let you get settled and I’ll see you at dinner with the team." he said.

"Yeah, see you later."

If you were honest with yourself, you were a little disappointed at how meeting Bucky went, you were really looking forward to meeting the super soldier.

While all the other girls were busy crushin on Captain America, you always felt more attracted to Sergeant Barnes.

Something about him just made you curious, and, after all the Winter Soldier stuff came to light, you were one of the few people that saw right away that Bucky was a victim.

You never did understand how people could read all the details of what happened to him and still call him a monster, like it was his fault that he was captured, tortured and made to do things no decent human being would ever do.

In fact, you got in trouble more than one time for fighting when things escalated while you were defending the super soldier from agents that didn’t see it like you.

It’s really a shame that a lot of agents of Shield itself thought so ill of the Sergeant. Maybe that’s why he didn’t like you, maybe he thought you were one of them.

You had to make sure he knew you weren’t.

Having made up your mind, you decided there was no better time like the present. You crossed the hall and knocked on his door, and after a few moments he opened.

"I know, Steve, don-" he interrupted himself the second he laid eyes on you.

"Sorry, not Steve. Clearly. I’m sorry to bother you, Sergeant Barnes, I just wanted to let you know that I don’t have anything against you. I know some agents feel like you should be held accountable for the things you were forced to do, and they’re not really afraid to get vocal about it, but I’m not one of them. I don’t think any of it was your fault. It may not matter much to you, after all you don’t seem to like me very much, but it’s important to me that you know this. You’re kind of my hero." you finished, a little embarrassed at admitting this to his face. He looked at you for a few moments and, just as you thought he was about to slam the door in your face, he grinned.

"I’m your hero, doll?" he asked, leaning on the door frame with his arms crossed in a way that made his biceps look huge and a smirk on his face.

After that you and Bucky became quick friends, spending more and more time together. Missions, training, down time, you were practically attached at the hip.

You were always careful not to let any feelings grow other than friendship and, mostly, it was easy.

There were some times where you somehow ended up flirting, but they were fleeting moments that passed as quickly as they came, and you decided, for your own peace of mind, to not overthink them and let it go every time.

Now, back to the present, the reason why you’re lost in your thoughts and feelings for Bucky.

You’re watching from a distance as Bucky smiles and laughs, happier than you’ve ever seen him surrounded by his friends, more relaxed than he’s ever been during a party.

You smile at his happiness, glad that he’s finally comfortable around pretty much everybody, but your face falls pretty fast as you see him wrap his right arm around her.

You’ve known Sharon for a while now, she was one of the agents in the list for the spot in the Avengers before you got it. You always felt like she resented you for it, like she should’ve been the one to get it because she was already close with some of the members of the team.

She was never openly hostile with you, but you did notice her hanging around Bucky more and more in the last few months. You didn’t think anything of it, but you were proved wrong just half an hour ago when Bucky started to introduce her to the avengers she didn’t already know as his girlfriend.

As soon as that word came out of his mouth, so casually you’d think he'd been saying it his whole life, you felt like you were gonna throw up.

It took all your skills to keep your face as neutral as possible, you felt like Sharon’s eyes were on you the whole time, trying to see every micro expression she could find to know what you were thinking.

But you were probably just imagining that, right?

You excused yourself as soon as you could and went straight to the bar to get the strongest drink Nat could make, which she handed to you with a knowing look while glancing behind you.

You barely had time to think before you felt his hand on your shoulder, feeling his body next to you but you didn't turn to look at him, taking a sip of your drink instead.

"Hey, doll, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about Sharon before, it’s still pretty new."

You tried to keep your voice as cheery as you normally would around him. "Why would you? It’s your relationship, why are you apologizing?"

He gave you a weird look you'd never seen before, before saying "Because we’re best friends? We usually tell each other everything… right?" he sounded a bit uncertain.

"Yeah, right, duh." you said, trying to give a genuine laugh "Well, it’s alright anyway, now I know! Stop worrying, just go be with her."

He looked around your face for a few more moments, like he was looking for something, before he said "ok, then." and left.

You managed to keep the smile on your face until you were sure he was gone, but dropped it as soon as you looked back ahead of you.

Taking another sip of your drink and making a face at how much alcohol was actually in it, you looked at Nat and, nodding, you left before she could comment on the scene you’re sure she just watched in its entirety.

So here you are now, in a corner watching people enjoy themselves, just like you used to do at parties with Bucky by your side, except you’re alone.

You try to look on the bright side, you really are, but you can find none.

You can't talk about it with anyone either since nobody knows about your feelings for the super soldier, except for Natasha who always seems to know everything, but you aren't too close with her and neither of you ever actually spoke about it out loud.

Not that you would've, you aren't the most outgoing person, usually keeping your feelings and most of your thoughts to yourself, with the exception of Bucky.

With him talking seems like the easiest thing in the world, it doesn't matter about what. He knows almost everything that he could possibly know about you, the only thing that you could never bring yourself to talk about is your feelings for him.

You feel a hand in the low of your back and, just as you're bringing your fist up, you realize it's just Steve. "Easy there, tiger." he chuckled, lowering your arm for you. "You seem a little on edge. Everything okay?"

"Everything’s just fine, Captain. You can salute your way to someone else now." His laugh makes you smile against your will.

"Okay, rookie, you don’t wanna talk about it." you roll your eyes at the old nickname, but he keep going, "you know, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you at a party without your moping buddy."

You glance at Bucky, who's busy laughing it up with Clint and Laura, his arm still around Sharon. Your eyes find Steve’s again, and you simply shrug. "We’re allowed to do our own thing, aren’t we?"

"Of course you are... I was just wondering why you weren’t with him, that’s all."

You avoid his eyes while you quietly say, "he already has someone at his side tonight, doesn’t need me there."

"What’s that supposed to mean?" comes a voice from behind you.

Damn. The one moment you weren’t looking at him and he sneaks up on you.

You turn around and see him standing there, arms crossed in front of his chest, Sharon at his side with a smug look on her face that you convince yourself you’re just imagining.

"What’s what supposed to mean?" You try playing dumb, but you know Bucky can see right through that.

He raises an eyebrow at you expectantly but when you just shrug and give him your best confused look, he sighs and looks at Sharon. "Hey babe, can you get me a scotch from the bar? I’ll meet you there."

You don't know if you're more hurt at him calling her that or relieved at the fact that he didn’t use the nickname that was usually reserved for you.

She just nods and, without taking her eyes off of you, gives him a kiss on the lips. Okay, you definitely didn’t imagine that. As soon as she’s far enough, Bucky turns back to you.

"What’s wrong with you tonight?" He asks sharply.

"Excuse me? Who said there was something wrong with me?" You say defensively.

"Oh come on doll, you’ve been weird ever since Sharon got here. What’s the matter, do you not like her or something?"

You don't know what to say. You certainly aren't about to tell your best friend that the reason you don’t like his new girlfriend is because you have feelings for him. That’s not gonna end well for anybody. So you decide to just keep on denying.

"I don’t know what you’re talking about, Bucky, so why don’t you just go after you little girlfriend and enjoy your night with her."

"That, right there." he points at your face in a very accusatory manner. "What the fuck was that?"

"What was what?" you’re starting to raise your voice a little and swatting at his hand, getting annoyed at him for not letting this go.

"You’re being a jerk about Sharon, what is your problem with her?"

"I don’t have a problem with her!"

"Yes, you do!"

"Why are you trying to make this into a problem?!"

"Because I know you!" At this point you're both yelling.

"Well, clearly, you don’t know me as well as you think you do!" Lie.

"Why do you have to be so stubborn?! Just tell me what the hell is your problem!"

"Why do you care so much? Even if I had a problem, it’s my business, it’s not like I’m your girlfriend!" Bucky just looks at you with a face you’d never seen on him before and you can't decipher.

The whole room seems to go quiet as you two just look at each other for a few moments, then Bucky finally speaks.

"You’re right." he says, in a much quieter voice than a second before "you’re not my girlfriend. I just thought you were my friend. Guess I was wrong. I’ll go after my little girlfriend now."

You can't find it in you to say anything and, when you just look at him, he scoffs and turns around to make his way to the bar.

Slowly it feels like everyone else starts to go back to what they were doing before your yelling match stopped the party in its tracks, but you feel like you can't breath, let alone move, as you watch the spot where Bucky was standing just moments ago, tears starting to form in your eyes.

You can’t believe that just happened. Did Bucky really just say you aren’t his friend?

A hand on your shoulder brings you back to reality and you hear Steve saying "are you okay?" from next to you.

In all honesty, you forgot he was even there.

All that comes out of you is a broken sob before you turn around and make a run for the elevator, as fast as you can run in heels and a floor-length cocktail dress.

Steve runs after you, but there are too many people around that slow him down, and by the time he gets to the elevator the doors had just closed.

He waits to see where you would stop, assuming your shared floor but you never know. His eyebrows furrow in confusion and he pushes the button of the elevator, glad that he waited a second more.

When he gets to the roof it's so dark outside that it takes a second before he find you, and once he does he slowly gets close to you.

What he was not expecting was to find you sitting on the ground, hugging your knees and crying.

Steve sits down next to you and puts his arm around your shoulders wordlessly while you cry.

After you calmed down a bit he says "He’s really worried about you, Y/N. If there’s something going on, you should just tell him. He’ll understand…"

You think about it for a few minutes while you find a way to tell Steve what's going on.

"How do you tell someone that the reason you’re sad is because you love them?" you say with tears starting to form again in your eyes.

Steve can only stare at you, at a loss for words.

You hear something behind you and when you turn you see Bucky’s back, walking towards the elevator.

It doesn’t matter how long he was there for, he obviously heard you.

You look back at Steve that has an apologetic look on his face, confirming your fear. Damn super soldier hearing.

Well, it looks like your friendship with Bucky is officially dead.

Part 2

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coquitokisses · 2 months ago

Note

Someone send me ideas to write something about Steve Rogers lmaooo/

Steve and the reader (agent) hate each other. She's close to becoming an avenger, but Steve doesn't like her cause she's really sassy and naughty, they end up getting paired in a mission together and get trapped 😉

Insufferable | Steve Rogers

Pairings: Steve Rogers x female!avenger reader

Word count: 3.4k

Warnings: language, mentions of claustrophobia and an anxiety/panic attack, it was supposed to be an enemies-to-kinda lovers but I didn’t really get to the “lovers” part so it’s an enemies-to-kinda friends-to-eventually kinda lovers I guess? Lmao

Summary: Steve doesn’t really get along with reader and they end up getting paired up in a mission. While they’re at it, they both get trapped in a room for a few minutes and reader is claustrophobic… but Steve doesn’t know that and when he sees her like that, it kinda changes how he feels about her

A/n: thanks to the person who sent me this! I hope you like it and I hope I was able to bring your idea to life! I honestly don’t know how I got this idea, but here we are lol (also, I’m not claustrophobic so everything I wrote was based off an article I read on google, so, sorry if it’s not accurate)

“I’m not going with her.” Steve said in a more serious tone as soon as he heard Fury telling him that he had to go on this mission with none other than you “Send me with Bucky.”

You and Steve have a complicated relationship. A very complicated one. He just can’t stand you, as simple as that. Ever since you started working at SHIELD, he never really got along with you because of your very outgoing personality. Steve would use the word “bratty” whenever he would complain to Bucky or Natasha about you saying that you always had a response to everything. They, of course, didn’t have a problem with you at all, in fact, you got along pretty well with everyone.

Except America’s sweet golden boy who apparently is a little uptight and he just simply doesn’t know how to have fun.

“You’re in no position to give orders, miss Y/L/N will be assisting you in this mission, end of discussion.” Fury replied

“Just send Sam, hell, send Scott for all I care.” Steve said, almost praying, begging to god that Fury changed his mind and changed his partner for this mission

“No and no, I need Wilson, he’s on another mission with Natasha and Barnes.” He responded

“What about Clint?”

“He’s having some well deserved family vacations. I want you and Y/L/N in the mission since you two are the most qualified to do it.” He said “You leave in 30 minutes, anything else?”

Steve just sighed. “No, sir.”

“Good, then I’ll see you for your mission report.”

After that, Steve left Fury’s office and just headed to the jet since he was already suited up knowing that the whole team was gonna be busy today. Once he got there, he saw you talking to one of the guys from comms and Maria.

“Excited to be paired up with moi, handsome?” You said once Steve was closer to you two

He rolled his eyes. “Thrilled.”

Maria chuckled. “This is gonna be so good.” She looked back at you “Good luck, I feel like you’re gonna need it.”

“Yeah, probably.” You sighed and then gave her a small smile “Thanks.”

(…)

“We go down the bridge, we go in from the sewers and then..” Steve was explaining the plan but you interrupted him

“I’m sorry, the sewers?” You lifted your head to look at him “I thought Fury said that we had easy access to this base.”

“This is easy access, there are no cameras, no sensors that could detect us and definitely no people.” Steve explained

“The base is abandoned.” You reminded

“What makes you think that they don’t have it under observation?”

You lift your hand and pinch the bridge of your nose softly. “I should’ve gone with Bucky and Nat.”

“Can I finish?” Steve looked at you

You sighed. “Go on.”

“Once we’re in, we just need to make our way to the office so we can get the files and get out.” He finished explaining “Questions?”

“Uh, yeah, we’re supposed to also grab some vials from the laboratory, how the hell are we gonna do that?”

“We can split up.”

“Split up? So you can leave me there?”

He shrugged. “Don’t tempt me.” He said lifting his head to look at you

You gave him a small sarcastic smile as you crossed your arms. “Wouldn’t dream of it.”

“You go to the lab, I get the files, okay?”

You just nodded in response. Each of you got an earpiece and then walked out of the jet before heading down a hill, which was covered by snow, by the way, to get below the bridge. You managed to get to the sewers and with Steve’s help, you both got inside.

“I swear, Fury do this on purpose.” You let out a sigh

“I’m starting to think the same thing.” Steve replied

“Aw, what? Can’t be alone with me in the dark?” You turned around and he squinted when the flashlight you were holding hit his face

“You’re sick.” He rolled his eyes “And watch out, you’re gonna fall.”

“You’re worrying about me, that’s cute.”

“I’m not but unfortunately, I need you alive and well to get this over with.”

“Ouch.” Your brows furrowed a little “I know you hate me, no need to remind me.”

“Can we just get the mission done?”

You just rolled your eyes. “Aye aye, captain.”

You honestly didn’t really cared. You knew Steve didn’t like you since the very first day you started working with them. But there wasn’t really anything you could do, you got along with pretty much everyone else, except him. Which at first was obviously kinda devastating and made you feel like shit because the Captain America didn’t like you. You thought that it was something you had done or that you needed to change something. But with time you figured that it wasn’t, it was him, only him, who didn’t like you.

And yes, you knew that the main reason was because of your attitude and your personality, because apparently being a very outgoing person and a big extrovert was something that didn’t quite mix well with Mr. America. He sometimes compared you to Tony, which you didn’t mind at all, it was flattering really. The Tony Stark? That was a compliment.

You’ve tried to win him over but nothing has really worked so you kinda gave up. What else could you do? He wasn’t gonna change his opinion of you and honestly, you didn’t really cared.

You guys split up and you started searching for the lab while Steve went to take the files. Everything was dark, you could hear some water droplets falling from afar and you were already sweating.

“Alright, I got the files, where are you?” After a few minutes, Steve’s voice sounded through the earpiece

“I think I just found the lab.” You replied as you tried opening the door but it was stuck “You need to come open this fucking door because I can’t.” You wiped your hands on your pants

“I’m on my way.”

Steve was there in a few minutes and he helped you open the door so you could both get into the laboratory.

“They’re supposed to have a yellowish or a…” Steve started saying before you cut him off

“Or a reddish substance, I know, I paid attention during the meeting.” You said as you made your way into a room that was divided by a white plastic curtain

You used your flashlight and found the vials, they were on a shelf in a little box.

“I found them.” You announced walking towards the vials

You heard Steve’s footsteps behind you and then you got up in a chair that was there so you could grab the vials since they were pretty far. As soon as you picked up the box, both of you heard a noise coming from behind and when you turned around, right where the curtain was, a door closed trapping you both inside the room.

“You’re fucking kidding.” You said immediately getting off from the chair and leaving the vials on the table

Steve went and tried to open it by kicking it and punching it but it was useless. Not even a scratch on that door.

“Did I just trapped us in here?” You pressed the palm of your hand over your forehead

“Seems like it.” Steve replied letting out a frustrated sigh

You were hoping, praying to god that the door somehow opened.

“This can’t be fucking happening.” You said under your breath

You were claustrophobic and something about being trapped in a small room—just with your flashlights—that’s underground it’s not helping at all.

“There’s gotta be a button or something that can open the door from inside.” You heard Steve say but you were too busy trying to control your breathing so you don’t have a panic attack

You felt your hands sweaty and you could swear your heart was about to burst out of your chest. You left your flashlight on the table with shaky hands and decided to sit on the chair that you were standing just a few minutes ago.

You could hear Steve’s voice but to you it all sounded muffled and like he was talking to you from afar, when he was literally just a few feet away from you. You weren’t even paying attention and you couldn’t understand a word he was saying since you were too busy trying to calm yourself down.

“Hello? Are you even listening to me, Y/N?” That was the only sentence you heard loud and clear

“Oh my god, would you please just stop talking for a fucking moment?! I swear to god I’m about to pass out.”

He turned around to look at you, ready to start bickering with you about the way you just snapped at him, but when he saw that you had your face hidden in your hands and how fast you were breathing and the way you were shaking your leg. And not to mention, with that super hearing of his, he could hear your heart pounding.

“Are you okay?” He asked a little worried actually

“No! I’m not okay!” You blurted out with shaky voice

He has never seen you like this. You were always so bubbly and so active and talkative that it really surprised him to see you like this.

You took a deep breath before talking because you knew your voice was gonna come out shaky as hell again since you were trying very hard not to cry. “I’m having a little panic attack and I just need you to stay quiet for a moment until I can pull myself together, okay?”

“Uh.. can I do anything to help other than stay quiet?”

You sighed. “I don’t know and my mind really doesn’t want to think of something right now.”

A soft “okay” left his lips as he walked from one side to another trying to think of something that could help you. And then something popped up on his head.

He remembered that when Bucky was finally free from Hydra, he would still get nightmares and sometimes he would have anxiety, like, bad. Steve was always there to help him and he read somewhere online about techniques to help calm a panic or anxiety attack in case it’d ever get to that point. Luckily he didn’t but he did helped him with a few things he read.

Maybe he can help you too. And he really needs you to get this done, it’s not like he can just leave you behind.

“Okay, wanna do the 5-4-3-2-1 method?” He turned around to look at you

“I- I don’t know, what are you even talking about?” You lifted your head to look at him

“It’s like a grounding technique, it’s supposed to help you get distracted.” He explained “Wanna try it?”

“Whatever, I don’t know!” You sobbed covering your face again

“Okay, uh.. look at five objects.” He said

“Wh- what?” You looked at him “Steve, I-“

“Just do it, come on.” He moved his flashlight so the room could be more bright “Five objects.”

“Uhhh..” you were trying to take deep breaths while also looking around to find five objects “Um, the flashlight.” You pointed at your flashlight that was on the table

“Okay, give me another one.”

“The table.”

“Three more.”

“Uhh.. I don’t know.” You ran a hand through your hair, your eyes still scanning the room “Uh, the vials.”

“Good, give me another one.”

“The chair.” You muttered

“Only one more.”

“Um..” you swallow “I don’t know, my boots?”

“Okay, that was good.” He nods “Now listen to four different sounds.”

“Listen?“ you scoffed “Here?”

“You can do it, come on.”

You took a deep breath and tried to focus on your surroundings—aka, the room you were trapped in—trying to listen to a noise or a sound that you could mention. Steve could already hear your heart rate slowing down a little.

“There’s water leaking.” You said softly as you focused on the water droplets falling on the floor somewhere in the room

“Good, what else?”

“Um..” you sniffled “My heart.” You lifted a hand to your chest feeling the beats of your heart against it

“Two more.” He said

“My foot tapping on the floor.” You replied

“You’re doing good, just one more.”

“…Your voice.”

“Okay that was good, now touch three objects.” He told you

“Oh god.” You rolled your eyes

You moved your hand to the table and you touched your flashlight.

Your heart rate was starting to go back to normal.

“Good, touch something else.”

You looked around and then down to your body and saw that you had your gun in your holster so you dragged your hand there.

“One more.”

You lifted your hand to the table again and this time you touched the box where the vials were.

“Now identify two smells.” He says

You took a deep breath taking in the smell in the room, trying to identify two at least.

“Humidity.” You replied

“Yeah, what else?”

“Sweat.” You say pretty obvious

Steve let out a soft chuckle. “Okay, now name one thing you can taste, this is the last one.”

You swallowed trying to figure out what you could taste in your mouth.

“I still have the taste of the spicy cinnamon gum I was chewing when we got here.” You said

“Good.” He nodded lightly “You feel better?”

You took a moment and realized that you actually were feeling better. No more trouble breathing, your heart didn’t want to beat out of your chest, your hands weren’t sweaty or shaky and you even stopped shaking your leg.

“I do, actually.” You nodded “Thanks.”

“No problem.” He replied with a small shrug “Now, do you think you could help me figure out a way to get out of here?”

You stood up from the chair and looked around, using your flashlight, until you looked up and saw some vents.

“What if we use those?” You pointed with your flashlight

“Are you sure you can handle that?”

You sighed. “I don’t know, but we can’t really stay here, can we?” You looked at him

“Alright, let’s do it then.”

You grabbed the vials and then Steve moved the chair so you both could climb up to the vents. He opened it and then got off the chair so you could go first.

You were just looking up thinking how the hell you were gonna do this. “I’ll be right behind you.” You heard him say

You looked down again and he offered you his hand, you took it and he helped you get on the chair and up the vent.

“Oh my god, oh my god..” you started saying, your voice echoing in the vents “I’m coming down, I can’t.”

“Yes you can.” He said putting his hand on your ankle “And you can’t come down because I’m already here so.”

“Oh my god.” You say, taking deep breaths trying to calm down

“You’re okay.”

“I’m dizzy..” you muttered “Oh my god.. I’m gonna throw up.”

“Hey.” He gave you a small pat on your leg “Okay, talk to me, what would you like to do when we get out of here?”

“Lay in the snow.” You replied starting to slowly move forward “I’m so hot..”

“What about when we get to the compound? What are you planning on doing?”

“Um..” you swallowed closing your eyes trying to focus on not to vomit “Take a very long shower.”

Steve managed to keep your mind busy while you guys found the exit and without even noticing, you were feeling a whole lot better. You weren’t nauseous anymore and being in that small space wasn’t really bothering you since you were too busy focusing on what he was asking you.

After a few minutes, you guys finally got out of the vents and were getting out of the base.

“Wait! Where are the files?” You turned to look at Steve

“Ah shit, I think I left them in the lab.” He rolled his eyes

“Are you kidding me? We went through all that for what then?”

He reached behind him and took out the yellow folder from his back. “You went through all that.”

You rolled your eyes as you kept on walking towards the jet. “Very funny.”

“You know, I never would’ve thought that someone like you would be claustrophobic.”

“Someone like me?” You raised an eyebrow

“A smart mouth.”

“Look who’s talking, the man who always have something to say to every single thing I say or do.”

“See? That just proves my point.” He said and you could hear a hint of cockiness in his voice

You hated when he was like that.

You roll your eyes. “Whatever, dude.”

“Hey, I thought you said you wanted to lay in the snow before we left.” He said

You turned around to look at him and he raised his brows at you. Your eyes went down to the ground watching how white and pretty the snow looked.

“I feel okay now.” You replied

“You sure? We’re not in a rush.” He continued walking until he was next to you

“Why are you being so nice?” You crossed your arms

He just stared at you for a few seconds before responding. “I’ll stop being nice then.”

“You literally hate me.” You turned around to continue your walk to the jet which was not too far now

He looked at you with his eyebrows slightly furrowed. He didn’t hate you. Yeah, you weren’t his favorite person and he didn’t really like you, but hate was a strong word.

You were very close to the jet already when all of a sudden, you feel him pushing you so hard making you fall into a small mound of snow.

You gasped and quickly lifted your head to look at him.

“I don’t hate you.” He said walking passed you and you were just sitting there covered in snow looking at him, mouth slightly opened since you didn’t expect him to actually push you

“Dick..” you muttered as you got up

+ + +

Back at the compound, you went to medical, it was kinda mandatory after each mission to check that everything was okay.

Steve didn’t really bothered to go since he heals faster because of the serum. Not that he was injured anyway. Buy he usually skips that part unless he’s injured really bad.

He was standing outside of the infirmary watching as one of the paramedics was checking your blood pressure.

“So,” Nat’s voice made Steve turn his head in her direction “I heard Y/N didn’t enjoy this mission.”

“She’s okay now.” He said turning his head back to the glass to look at you

“And why are you here?”

“Just making sure everything’s fine.”

“Thought you hated her.”

He looked at her. “I don’t hate her.”

“You act like you do.” Nat shrugged

“Well I don’t.” He replied “She’s just really annoying.”

They both saw when you and the paramedic exchanged some words before he handed you a paper. You thanked him and then Natasha quickly left before you walked out of the infirmary, stopping as soon as you saw Steve standing there.

“Hi?” You looked at him frowning a little

“Hi.” He replied

“What are you doing here?” You ask as you continue to walk, him walking right next to you

“Just checking.” He shrugs “What did they say?” He looked down at the paper

“Oh, um.. they want me to talk to the psychologist.” You roll your eyes as you scrunched the paper into a ball “That won’t be happening.” You say with a low chuckle

His lips curved into a small smile. “You sure you’re okay?”

“I am, Rogers, my blood pressure is back to normal.”

“Good, that’s good.” He nods

“Sooo, um..” you cleared your throat “I guess I’ll see you around.” You say with a shrug “I told Wanda I was gonna help her in the kitchen.”

“Yeah, sure.” He said “It’s not like you’re leaving anytime soon anyway.”

“That’s right.” You smiled “I’ll see you later.”

He just gave you a small smile, a very small one, before you continued walking towards the elevator.

He did wanted you gone, but now.. not so much.

masterlist

A/n: I think I can make more parts to this 👀

Likes and reblogs will be appeciated!

divider creds @cafekitsune

#marvel #mcu #steve rogers fluff #steve rogers imagine #steve rogers fanfiction #steve rogers fic #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers #captain america fluff #captain america x reader #captain america fanfiction #captain america fic #captain america #chris evans #nina responds 🥥💋

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scar-lie · 11 months ago

Text

Their First Love [Natasha]

Summary : What happens when someone come back to get what's them.

Pairing : Natasha Romanoff x Fem!Reader, Natasha Romsnoff x Bucky Barnes

Warning : None, I guess

Word Count : 2,642

A/N : Hi everyone so sorry that I didn't post the chap 9 of Omega and the crossover oneshot, my school ends right before Christmas eve, then my Mom got admited to the hospital and well next is new year so it's kinda busy, sorry again but this oneshot is in my draft for over a month or week now so this is my sorry token for you all

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE 🥳🎉

{THEIR FIRST LOVE PT. 2}

No one has permission to repost my work anywhere, if you see it please let me know.

You sigh, getting off the elevator in the compound to visit Natasha. You two have been friends for over two years now. You two met in the coffee shop nearby your company building. She sat at your table with your permission because, at that time, the shop didn’t have any vacant seats left. Since then, you two have hit it off and become friends. After a year, you started to date, and you courted her until today.

But once you get off the elevator and pass the two doors that lead into a common room of the Avengers quarters, you frown at seeing everyone gather around and see Natasha clinging to a guy.

“What’s happening? "You question walking forward; everybody looks at you.

“Oh, Bucky, the winter soldier, Steve’s pal back in the days, and the Bucky I’ve been talking about—uhm, he's back and sided with us,” Natasha explains, giving you a hug and a kiss on your cheek.

“Hi, Y/N, nice to meet you.” You offer him a hand, but he just looks at it without emotion, so you take your hand back.

"Ok,” you mumble, and sit down on the couch and just look at them, especially Nat and Steve, who have pampered this new guy with questions and appreciation that he’s here now.

You just let them have fun and enjoy their time. You understand why, especially Steve and Nat. I mean, that’s Steve's pal or brother, and that’s Natasha’s first love, the love she found in the red room and KGB, where torture and killing grow, where she trains to be a black widow. But you’re not going to hide the fact that you’re jealous and scared that what you and Nat have will end soon.

You let it slide the first few weeks, where Natasha was constantly clinging to Bucky and having quality time, and set you aside, but when the 5th week struck, you confronted her, where she just got home from a 2-day mission with Bucky, Tony, and Sam.

She’s tired and exhausted. Their mission goes south, which comprises a lot of people's lives, and all she wanted to do was go home, get the dirt and blood off of her body, and hope the frustration and self-blame will go down the drain too with the rest of the dirt, and sleep the night off.

But that’s not what’s waiting for her; instead, you’re in her bed, sitting and looking at the wall in front of you. When Natasha enters her room, she sighs and comes to kiss your forehead, then goes off to go to the bathroom.

“Be honest with me, Natasha... Are we still dating, or will you and Bucky go back together? "You asked before she could close the door, not looking at her form, which was frozen in her spot.

Natasha frowns, slowly turning back at you with a confused look. She doesn’t know how to answer it, and she herself doesn’t know either. All she knows is that Bucky is here; she wants to spend time with him, but at the same time, she’s building a relationship with another person, which is you. She just sighs, trying to look into your eyes, but you keep your eyes straight.

“I-uhmm….I don’t know…I-” You didn’t let her finish her sentence; you already heard enough, so you stood up, took your bag on the sofa, and headed out to her front door. Natasha quickly followed you.

“Call me if you already have an answer,” you mumbled enough for her to hear, but Natasha never let you get out that easily.

"Hey, hey, hey! No, you’re not going to walk out on me; we’re going to talk this out like a mature adult.” She pulls you inside and closes the door of her room.

“Ok, I admit that I spend more time with Bucky and that I’m putting you aside, but that doesn’t mean that I will end things between us.” She started searching for your eyes to look back at her too.

“And there’s a "but" coming, right? "You look at her; you already know how this is going. Well, you should have known better.

“But I don’t know, I... I still yearn for him... I don’t know, ok, please understand,” she whispered, and you just nodded. You can’t do anything about it, though. I mean, you two don’t put a label on who you both are, so she’s still free to choose him over you.

"Ok.” That’s all you said, and you walked past her.

“That’s all you’re going to say? "You sigh again and turn around, giving her a small, tight smile.

"Yeah, what do you want me to say? Do you want me to be angry or what? I mean, we’re not together, Nat; we’re just dating. I’m your suitor, Nat, so I don’t have the right to be angry or tell you to distance yourself from your first love, so yeah, that’s all I have to say.” With that, you leave her room and go back to your house as soon as possible to sleep it off and get ready for your endless meeting tomorrow, but God has other plans because you met Bucky on the way.

“Hi…..Y/N right? "Bucky, stop you before you can leave the two doors in the lounge where he sat, with snacks in his hand and a coffee table, so you stop and turn around to look at him tiredly.

“Yeah, that’s me. Why? "You sigh when he stands up and stands in front of you, trying to intimidate you, but honestly, if you’re not tired and don’t give a fuck, you’re probably intimidating him too.

“I don’t appreciate you getting close to Natasha, so could you please distance yourself? "I scuff at him, standing straight, grasping my handbag in front of me with my two hands.

“Maybe I should be the one telling you that, because before you come along, we’re dating,” you calmly said, giving him a tight smile.

“Well, are you two together? "He challenges you, and you clench your jaw, looking up at him.

"No.” You didn’t back down, and he smirked, satisfied at your answer.

“I suggest you start moving on, because I’m courting her.” He gives you a sly look and pats your shoulder, then leaves.

You clench your jaw and give him a dirty finger, leaving the building with irritation and annoyance, and go straight home to wash away all the stress and tiredness in your body since this morning, when your day started to go south.

You didn’t bother to go to the compound for a week now because of a hectic workload, meetings here and there, and some dumbass who can’t do their jobs properly. Even though you missed Natasha and wanted her hugs and cuddles, you couldn’t visit her, so you just kept gifting Natasha food or flowers and texting her, but most of the time she ignored you, and you just rolled your eyes at that, thinking they were probably having their time together, so today you’re going to visit her.

But once you get to the compounds quarter, your mood quickly drops seeing Natasha leaning toward Bucky while watching some movies, but you put your jealousy and irritation aside and great her.

"Hey, Nat,” you say. She looks at you and quickly stands up and greets you with a hug and a kiss in the check that makes Bucky look at you dirty.

“Hi, how are you? You haven’t been here for a week now.” You give her a smile and show her the Chinese takeout you brought.

“Just busy in the office, that's all. Are you hungry? "You asked, taking her hand to drag her into the kitchen to eat.

"Sorry, but she’s full; we just got home to eat lunch.” He smirked at you, and you gave him a glare while he stood up and took Natasha off of you.

“So if you wouldn’t mind, we’re watching a movie," he says, then guides her back to the couch while Natasha just looks back at you, looking for your reassurance, but you keep neutral, which makes Natasha worried.

"Uhm, wait, Buck, actually, I’m-” Before she can get out of Bucky's grasp, you walk straight back to the kitchen, putting down the paper bag, and go back to leave the building.

“In case you..." you point to them with a tight smile.

“Get hungry or just give it to someone who wants it; I’ll be heading out now.” Then you leave with a sigh; you’re losing hope; well, he’s her first love; you can’t fight with that; that’s her greatest love; and now the only option you have is to accept it, because sooner or later, you’re expecting Natasha to talk to you and end things between you two.

And you’re not wrong, because the next time you visited, you saw them together in the gym, sparing, well, more intimately; they kissed passionately, savoring their time together, and that broke your heart completely into pieces.

And you don’t have the heart to ruin it for her, so you just give yourself a smile, nod, and turn back, going to her room to get some of your stuff you left there, and well, wait for her there to have a talk. You know she’s not going to say it to you right away, so you’ll confront her.

Once Natasha entered the room with a big smile on her face and a tint of red in her check, saying goodbye to Bucky, you didn’t look up at her; you just looked at her waist until you heard her gasp, shocked to see you sitting on the edge of her bed.

"Y/N," she mumbles, not moving a single inch in her spot until she clears her throat, having the courage to tell you something.

“Glad to see you here, cause I need to talk to you too,” she carefully said, reading your dementor, but she failed, so she just gulped the lump on her throat and just blurted out.

“I need to end things between us because I know it’s not fair to you if I keep this hidden, but... I'm getting back with Bucky.” Her heart beat faster. Looking at you, you scuffed and nodded. At least she had the courage to tell you.

Natasha quickly became tense and gasped when she saw a few bags already packed. You looked up at her with a neutral dementor, the one you always wore before you met Natasha, and this made Natasha feel uneasy.

"Well, I guess it is my cue to leave now, since you already dropped the elephant in the room.” You stand up, taking your bag, and walk past her.

“I’m sorry,” she shouts, running to you. She feels guilty and hurt, even wanting you to look back at the eyes that she’s been searching for.

“Don’t be; you don’t owe me an apology or explanation…..and so do I, when I'll make no exception to anyone, including you, and when you don't have the same privilege you had before.” This makes Natasha’s eyes go wide; she knows how you are around in your company; you’re cold, strict, and scary.

“Excuse me, Miss. Romanoff, I still have a company that needs someone to run with.” With that, you leave the building and sulk yourself to work, declining every call and knocking on the door, letting your assistant be the only one who can come and go in your office, and rescheduling all your meetings for a week.

If you will move on, Natasha is no exception. You need to distance yourself from her and treat her like everyone else around you, even though she’s still your friend.

This doesn’t settle Natasha very well; sure, she’s happy that she’s with her first love that the KGB ripped out of her, but the unsettling feeling deep in her bothers her.

Sure, she’s happy going on dates, cuddling, spending time together, and having sex with Bucky, but it still feels wrong to her. It feels wrong deep inside her, and she tries to set it aside, but the feeling keeps building and building up, like she’s going to explode one day.

"Hey, are you ok? "Bucky asked her with concern. He just got out of the bathroom with a towel around his waist, while Natahsa just lay down in the bed, lost in her thoughts, and only the covers were covering her naked body while the morning sun started to rise.

"Yeah, yeah, I’m ok, just thinking.” Natasha looked at Bucky with a smile, so Bucky quickly lay beside her and buried his face in her neck.

“You’re thinking about her, do you? "Bucky whispers, looking up at her while she scuffs and shakes her head.

“What are you talking about, and who’s “her” you’re referring to? "Natasha, just look at him for a few seconds and go look somewhere else.

“You know what I’m talking about; I can feel it, Nat. You want her; you’re looking for her even though you keep saying to yourself that you’re okay." Natasha didn’t answer right away, thinking carefully.

"No, you're wrong,” Natasha just said and stood up, taking the cover with her.

“I already have what I want,” she said, trying to convince Bucky, but the truth is, she’s trying to convince herself more than Bucky.

Bucky didn’t argue with her; he knows Natasha is a stubborn one. Sure, he doesn’t know her very well now; things change, and he doesn’t want to push it.

But Natasha thought of it all day, and Bucky observed her the whole time, accepting that sooner or later Natasha would need to talk to him.

That day, Natasha went out to walk, think, and clear her head, letting her feet take her wherever they took her. That said, now she’s standing in the cafe shop where she first saw you, your memories of her flash in her mind, missing how you smiled and how soft you were to her, how you looked intimidating the first time you two met.

Then Natasha went to your favorite flower shop, where she most likely saw you before you courted her, buying different flowers every 3 times a week or maybe 4, then she visited the fast food chain you always whined to go to because you loved their onion rings and twisted fries there, then she went to your favorite burger food chain until she went around the town buying things that you always whined about.

Until she’s standing in front of your company building, frozen in her spot while looking up to the high tower where you are probably in and on one of the floors at the top, this makes her heartache, and she misses going here ever so often to visit you and spend time with you.

She sighs and decides to go in. Reasons? to give you the stuff she bought from different stores around the town, and she hopes that you will let her in or meet her.

But once she got inside, the receptionist wouldn't let her in with the reason—Ms. Y/L/N is busy and doesn’t want any visitors—she closed her eyes, cursing to herself, knowing she couldn't just walk past security or make her way around to get to you. She knows you already hate her, and doing the dirty job to get to you will fuel you more.

Natasha started to walk back, but not until someone screamed your name. That’s when she turned around and saw you, looking beautifully in your sexy business suit that shows all your assets with three bodyguards, and let the woman in your right arm. This broke Natasha, especially seeing who the woman is—it's the woman you talked about to her, your first love.

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dailyreverie · 11 months ago

Text

Fairytale

A/N: Based on this prompt requested by an anonymous person, if you see this, I love you, thanks for requesting! 🎄❤️

Holiday prompts ⛄️

11. Nice

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x fem. reader

Word count: 870

CW: Insecure reader, reader wears a dress.

There’s always this moment before going to the Avengers' parties, as you are in the middle of getting ready, where you start second guessing if what you are wearing is fine. Is the dress you've chosen too much or not enough? Is it too formal, or have you missed the mark on the dress code? Whatever it is, though, you are stuck with your choice since behind you, meeting your eyes with nothing but love and admiration, Bucky keeps saying how gorgeous you look. If only you could see with his eyes the way your dress makes you glow. There’s no way he would let you change, not when you look like that.

As you wait for your car to arrive, in the middle of a cold Brooklyn street where you feel like the street lights shine on you like a spotlight, you can’t help but feel self-conscious from the way you look. “Everybody’s looking at me.” You whisper against Bucky’s shoulder, trying to hide from prying eyes.

Truth is, there aren’t as many peaky lookers as you think there are; your mind plays tricks against you as you pull and tug the fabric, Bucky’s arm working as a shield against the rest of the world.

“That’s ‘cause you look stunning, doll.” He reassures you still, with a tender kiss pressed against your forehead, and when you look up to protest him, to tell him how you definitely missed the dress code, the only spotlight that matters is the one reflecting the admiration in Bucky's eyes.

"I still feel like it's too much," you insist, cheeks tinted with a rosy hue.

“Sweetheart, listen to me,” Bucky stands before you, grabbing your arms softly to make you look at him, his fingers traveling up and down your arm when your eyes meet his. “I promise you, you are the most stunning woman that has ever graced this earth.”

"Bucky..." you roll your eyes, but his smirk and laughter reassure you.

“I’ve been here a while, I know what I’m saying.” He concludes with a smirk that makes you laugh too. “I swear, you look perfect. So perfect, that when we get back home, I’ll make sure the whole building will hear the way I-”

“Excuse me,” a tiny voice interrupts your giggles, tugging at Bucky’s leg from somewhere close to the floor. The voice matches a little girl no more than six, who looks up at you with her eyes shining like Christmas lights.

“Hi there,” He greets with a surprised smile. “Are you okay? Are you lost?” Bucky adds immediately, the worry that washed over his voice making your heart feel warm.

“No, I’m not lost, I saw you from there..” she points at a corner from where a woman runs towards you, most likely her worried mother. “And I ran so fast! Because I-” She stops when she sees you looking at her, her eyes instantly shying away as her hand gestures to Bucky to crouch down until he reaches her height. “I wanted to say hi to the princess.” As she whispers, Bucky’s smile becomes gradually wider until it reaches his ears. “If she is your girlfriend can you tell her I say hi, please?”

Bucky looks at you with the fondest look he’s ever shown. “Why don’t you tell her, I’m sure the princess would love to hear it.” They exchange a look, Bucky encouraging her as she takes a step towards you.

“Hi princess,” she speaks up to you as you almost melt from how cute this little girl was, trully believing she was seeing a real-life fairytale princess. “You look really pretty.”

“Oh my- I-” You stutter a bit, getting flustered by the second. Words begin to fail you, but you are not one to break a little girl’s fantasy. “Thank you very much, so do you.” You notice she's all dressed up too, probably heading to a party too.

Her eyes light up and she takes your hand. “I want to be a princess when I grow up, just like you!”

“I’m sure you are going to be a wonderful princess.” You assure her, just as her mother arrives with a thousand apologies as she takes the girl away.

“Don’t worry about it,” You tell her with a wave, discarding all her worries.

“You are so nice, hopefully she will become like you one day, this little munchkin.” The munchkin in case can’t stop laughing as she is dragged away by her mother, who can’t do much but shout her goodbyes: “Goodbye princess! And goodbye handsome prince!”

Bucky stands up again as you both laugh at the moment, and when he meets your eyes again and his hands find yours to intertwine, he repeats his words again: “I told you: beautiful.”

"For all I know, you hired that girl," you playfully accuse, a light-hearted tease escaping your lips as you pull him closer with a smile that dissolves into a kiss. His own smile meets yours, letting go of your hands to hold your waist instead, erasing any distance that could be between you.

The sound of a car horn interrupts the tender exchange, and you part with shared smiles and love-filled eyes. For all he cares, in his eyes you are a fairytale princess, too.

🦾🎄🦾🎄🦾🎄🦾🎄🦾🎄🦾🎄🦾

Thanks for reading! Please reblog and comment if you enjoyed it!

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes x female reader

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littlemissomega · 2 years ago

Text

Viral

PornStar!Natasha x Influence Y/N

Warnings: SMUT, 18+, strap used, overstimulation, Mommy kink, video sex, live stream sex, cussing, pet names (bunny, luv, luvie, baby, babygirl, etc), praise kink, degradation kink, Y/N says “it hurt” (nothing is physically hurting her tho), bad writing

Author’s Note: Hey luvs! Sorry it took so long for me to post something! Not my best work, but here you go!

“Hey guys! It’s Y/N Y/L/N! So, for today’s live stream, I’lll be accepting questions, dares, and video ideas! Within reason, of course!”

Y/n smiles brightly into her camera as it records. She started doing videos about a year ago and quickly became a popular influencer in her community. She tugs a fallen curl behind her ear and grabs her phone, viewing her live’s chat.

“Okay, from !booboo cakes ‘What’s it like living with the Avengers? Well it’s definitely… an experience! It was kinda a culture shock to go from living with my aunt to living with a bunch of superheroes and gods from outer space! But at the end of the day, even though they’re faster and stronger than most, they are still pretty normal, I guess? We still fight over who’s gonna do the dishes and what movie to watch just like any group of friends living together!”

Y/N skims through the comments popping in and chooses the next one.

“What is it like partying with the #Avengers and who gets the drunkest? Umm expensive! They’d spend the monthly grocery budget on booze if they could! But they’re definitely party animals. And as far as the turtle of drunkest; Thor, Bucky, and Tony always fight for that,”

It continues like that for a while. Someone asks for a tour of her room, which she gives, another asks to see the training room. When she sees her girlfriend’s name in a comment, her eyes pop to it.

“How are things going with Natasha?” Y/N cheeks flush, “Y’all are so nosy! But if you must know, things are going great!”

A flood of comments like ‘omg she's totally blushing’ and ‘they’re so cute together!’ stream through the chat.

Most of Y/N’s most popular videos and vlogs include Natasha, more specifically Natasha making crude comments that make Y/N blush and stutter on camera, and when Natasha’s hands stay a little more than appropriate.

YN’s account is by no means for kids. She openly talks about relationships, sex, and other more sensitive topics. No one under the age of 18 can view her account. But Y/N’s followers never fail to go crazy when Tasha sneaks up behind her to kiss her neck while she records, or joins her for Q&As or dancing TikToks.

But her channel is also popular because of Natasha’s. Natasha has an equally- maybe more popular- BDSM account. She also happens to be a part time prnstar.

Y/N is much shyer than Natasha, so Natasha has never really touched her on her PornStarsToday account. But she often convinced Y/N to join her on her TikTok account. The videos spanned from Natasha demonstrated bandage knots, proper and safe ways to choke your partner, and safe word descosions. So it’s not like she bent Y/N over a counter and recorded fucking her, but it made Y/N wet all the same. As soon as Natasha stopped recording, Y/N never failed to get pulled apart thoroughly.

The dinging of Y/N’s phone snaps her out of her thoughts. She sees her girlfriend’s name again and doesn’t even read the comment before saying it aloud.

“Call Natasha’ Mommy’ on camera and see how she reacts- Oh!’ Y/N’s cheeks turn bright red and she looks away from her phone.

People aggressively like the comment and chime in with agreements.

“Y’all trying to get me in trouble!” Y/N laughs, still blushing, “Sorry, but I very much value my ability to sit and walk, thank you very much!”

But something in the back of her head jumps at the idea. She’d never called Natasha Mommy before. But she’ll never forget how Natasha reacted when Y/N called her Ma’am in bed for the first time.. Needless to say, Y/N couldn’t walk for two days after.

Y/N ponder the idea, becoming warmer at the idea of how Natasha might react. The warmth shoots straight to her core.

“Okay, okay, you horny fuckers, I’ll do it!” Y/N decides, feeling braver than usual, “let’s go find her,”

Y/N grabs her phone and camera before tip-going out of her room and down the hall.

Natasha is in the living room, read, when Y/N finally finds her. She doesn’t notice her at first, so Y/N props her camera up on the counter and starts recording on her phone as well for two angles.

Y/N prances over to Natasha, stopping within arms length. Tasha doesn’t look up, but a small smile forms on her lips, knowing Y/N is recording.

“Hi, mommy,” Y/n voice ever so innocently.

Natasha looks up slowly from her book. Her eyes take Y/N in, starting at her lips, then down to the strip of skin peeking out from her pink crop top, to her thighs barely covered in her short, flowy white skirt with flowers. She’s the definition of sexy innocence. Natasha’s eyes go dark and pool with lust, but she smirks a little, raising an eyebrow.

“Hi, Bunny,”

Y/’s knees go weak. Natasha only calls her Bunny when she’s about to pull her apart until she cries and begs and passes out from pleasure and pain She can’t help but let a whimper slip from her lips. Natasha smirks wider and the sound and grabs the backs of Y/N’s thighs, yanking her into her lap.

“Mommy,” the whimper slips from Y/N’s lips against her will. Natasha chuckles into her ear, lips moving to her neck.

“You’re making all sorts of mischief, aren’t you, Bunny?” Natasha croons.

Y/N lets out a small moan of response as Natasha sucks on her neck. The phone slips from her fingers, clattering to the ground.

“Drop something?” Natsha asks, amusement ringing in her voice.

“”Pick it up,” Natasha orders.

“But, Tasha, it’s record-” Y/”N starts.

“That’s not my fucking name,”

Y/N falls silent.

“Pick. It. Up.” Natasha orders again, slowly and firmly.

Y/N obeys, leaning over the arm of the chair and retrieving her phone. She goes to end the live stream, but Natsha stops her; taking and prying the phone from her fingers. Y/N’s eyes go wide as Natasha props it up on the coffee table before returning to kissing her neck. Y/N’s face is bright red.

“M-mommy, it’s still recording!’ Y/N voices, struggling to string words together as her girlfriend rubs circles on her thighs.

“I know,” Natasha responds. Her lips stray to Y/N’s collarbone, and Y/N can’t help but tilt her neck back.

“People are watching, Mommy!”

“So, say hi to the followers!” Natasha buckles as she pushes Y/N’s crop top up, leaving her black, lacey bra on display.

Natawsha’s fingers skim the top of Y/N’s bra, but she stops.

“Do you remember your safeword?” she asks gently. Y/N nods.

“It’s red,”

The safeword is cliche and overused, but that’s the first word that had popped into Y/N’s head when Natasha asked her all those months ago.

“Good girl,” Natasha whispers before pulling the cup of her bra down..

And she moans. Natashia fucking moans at the slight of her girlfriend’s soft breast and hard nipples. She latches her mouth around one of the painfully hard peaks and swirls her tongue around it. Y/N’s hands fly to Natawsha’s hair and she teg gently.

On the coffee table, Y/”ns phone buzzes and dings as comments flood in like ‘sorry, did I click on the wrong girlfriend’s account?” and “RIP Y/”

“Mommy pleaseee,” Y/N whines breathlessly.

Natasha removes her lips from Y/N’s nipple just long enough to ask, “You were supposed to be accepting requests and questions in this video, right?”

Y/N nods, unable to form words as Natasha continues her tortuous licking . Heat floods Y/N’s core faster than comments flood her phone.

“Then I suppose we should leave the decision to the followers!’ Natasha turns to the phone, “Should I I fuck her now, or keep teasing?”

Tugging at Natasha’s hair, she grinds lightly against her; desperate for any form of stimulation. Natasha picks the phone up and scrolls for a moment, tsksing.

“Poor bunny, your followers aren’t very loyal! This is going to be a very long video for you!” Naatasha chuckles, “Oh, here’s the most popular comment! They think you should keep grinding your pretty pussy against my thigh , but not be allowed to cum!”

Y/ whimpers at the culmination of crude words and disappointment.

‘But Mommy-”

“No buts! Gotta give the people what they want!”

Electricity shoots through Y/N as Natasha gently tugs her panties off, brushing the sensitive skin.

“Fucking soaked!” Natasha tsks, examining Y/N’s panties before throwing them to the side.

Natasha presses Y/N further into her legging-covered thigh.

“Get started, bunny,”

Moans slip from her lips as she juts her hips forward, dragging her pussy against Natasha

“Come on, you can do better than that!” Natasha voices, attempting to egg her on.

Y/N squeaks as Natasha grabs her hips, grinding her against her harder.

“You’re adorable,”

Y/N’s heart raises as she moves her hips back and forth, painstakingly slow.

“Faster,” Natasha orders like she read her mind.

Y/N obeys,digging her fingernails into Natasha’s shoulder. Her thighs start aching from the effort. Her core tightens as her clit drags against Natasha’s leg. The material is rough but slick with slit under her. Every drag and thrust does nothing to soothe the fire in her core, it just makes it stronger. She jults her hips up desperately and discovers a hard bulge in Natasha’s pants. She’s wearing a strap. Y/N’s hole throbs with the need to be filled.

“Mommy please! Need you so bad! Please, Mommy!” Y/N begs, forgetting about the camera for a moment.

“What do y’all think? SHould I give her what she wants?” Natasha asks the camera.

Y/N braces her head against Natasha’s shoulder and groans.

“You’re enjoying this way too much,” Y/N mumbles.

Natasha knees the flesh of Y/N’s ass and smirks.

“You look so beautiful, malishka. Let’s see if I get to fuck you yet,”

Natasha picks up the phone yet again and scrolls.

“Lucky bunny,” she smirks, “You get to ride my strap,”

Y/N almost cries at the words as Natasha pulls down the front of her leggings, a thick strap bouncing out.

“M-mommy! That’ll never fit like this!”

“I bet you can make it,” Natasha croons, thumb rubbing Y/N’s cheek.

Natasha never failed to choose long, thick straps despite her girlfriend’s smaller size. She loves watching how Y/N’s eyes glaze over and she cries when Natasha shoves the toy into her.

“But-”

“No buts,” Natasha repeats firmly, “Hop on it, bunny,”

Y/N’s hands shake as she goes to line the strap up with her squeezing entrance, but Natasha stops her.

“It’d be selfish to not like the followers see such a pretty little pussy! Come on, bunny!”

Natasha grips Y/N’s hips and flips her against in one sweeping motion. She’s now facing the coffee table, her back to Natasha.

“Mommy, I wanna see you!” Y/N whimpers.

“I know, luvie. Be a good girl for Mommy and ride her strap,”

Natasha lines her strap up with Y/N’s entrance, but Y/N doesn’t move.

“Momm-”

Natasha pinches her thigh and Y/N’s squeaks.

“Come one, luvie,” Natasha croons.

Y/N braces her hands on Natasha’s thighs as she slowly slides back onto the strap. Her entrance burns and she cries out as the thick strap stretches her. She gets almost a third of it in before she stops, tears burning her eyes.

“You’re only a third of the way there! I know you can do it, Bunny!”

“Mommy can’t!” Y/N babbles, a tear slipping down her hot cheek, “Too much!”

“Do you need some help, luvie?” Natasha croons.

Y/N nods, nails digging into Natasha’s legs. She whimpers as Natasha starts stroking her enlarged clit.

“I know, bunny,” Natasha soothes, “Your tiny baby pussy can hardly fit Mommy’s strap!”

Her other arm hooks around Y/N’s hips and slowly eases her down onto the strap. Y/N cries out at the unbelievable sense of fullness. She collapses back against Natasha, hissing at the shift. Her head lools against her shoulder. Natasha’s lips graze her ear.

“Come on, baby. Be a good girl and ride my strap. You look so pretty!”

Y/N lets out a mix between a huff, a sigh, and a whimper, but obeys. She can no longer hold her moans back as she lifts off Natasha’s lap, the strap sliding out a little, then back down. Her thighs burn as she repeats the movement. Wet, squelching sounds fill the room and Y/N blushes at the crude noise.She wants to touch Natasha so bad she can hardly stand it. Normally when they’re intimate, Y/N spends the whole time running her fingers all over Natasha’s body and holding her hands. She feels herself slipping deeper and deeper into subspace from the lake of comfort.

“Good girl,” Natasha purrs, “You look so pretty fucking youself on Mommy’s strap,”

She continues rubbing lazy circles on Y/N’s sensitive clit.

“Mommyyy, it hurts! Too big!” Y/N cries, her movements slowly.

“Aww, is Mommy’s fat strap too big for your little princess pussy?”

Y/N nods, not even processing the question.

“Then I guess I”ll have to stretch it out! Faster,”

Her leg cramps and everything aches as Y/N collapses against Natasha.

“Can’t, can’t,” she babbles, “Need help, Mommy,”

Y/N’s entrance throbs around the strap.

“Okay, luvie, shhh, it’s okay. Mommy’s gonna help her baby cum,” Natasha soothes, pushing strands of hair off her sticky forehead.

Natasha’s fingers leave Y/N’s clit, causing her to whimper softly. She calms as Natasha knits one hand together with hers, the other going to her hip.Natasha lifts her hips from the chair and starts thrusting up into Y/N.

“Oh!” Y/N cries, oher mouth forming an o, her eyes wide with pleasure.

The new angle causes the strap to rub every ridge in Y/N perfectly. Her climax building and she writhes.

“You acted so fucking innocent, but you must have known it would end this way, calling me Mommy for the first time, and on camera for that matter!” Natasha voices mocking in her ear.

“Oh fuck Mommy feels so good too much!”

Y/N’s skirt was long ago pushed to her waist, and it rubs against her skin. If she wasn’t so lost in pleasure, Y/N would be petrified at the idea of everything on display for all her followers to see. But she doesn’t even remember the camera anymore.

“Rub that poor clit, bunny,” Natasha orders. Y/N wordlessly obeys, moaning at the sensation.

“I’m g-gonna- '' Y/N starts, but a moan interrupts her and Natsha starts thrusting faster.

“I know, bunny. Cum for Mommy,”

A scream rips from her lips as she obeys, as if her body was waiting for Natasha’s permission. Heat ripples through her as her climax causing her vision to go starry and black. The shred of her consciousness left hears her babbling and moans towards Natasha as she starts coming down. Natasha slows down slightly, but not much. Y/N’s hand falls lip on her clit, but Natasha replaces it with her own. Sensitivity spikes through Y/N, snapping her out of her post climax haze.

“T-too much!” Y/N voices breathlessly

“You can do it, luvie. Just one for time for Mommy<” Natasha purrs in her ear.

“Can’t can’t can’t can’t Mommy can’t!” Y/N chants as her next climax building, threatening to push her over that cliff yet again.

“Yes you can, baby. Just one more, then you’re all done,” Natasha croons.

“Mommy I feel funny,” Y/N squeaks as an odd feeling builds in her core. Not her approching orgasum, but something else.

“Just one more time,” Natasha repeats, panting slightly, “Be a good little bunny and cum one more time.

Babbles and please slip from Y/N’s tongue as her climax hits her like a height train. She feels some kind of hot liquid squirt from her body before blacking out completely.

When Y/N awakens, her whole body is warm and comfortable. Her eyelids flutter open and she finds herself wrapped in Natasha’s arms in their bed.

“Hi, pretty girl,'' Natasha chuckles softly into her ear, “You were out for a hot second,, luvie. How a feeling?”

A heavy sense of exhaustion and leftover bliss hangs over Y/N.

“Good,” Y/N mumbles into Natasha's chest. That’s all she can manage with how subby she still feels. Natasha knows how deep Y/N slipped into subspace.

“You did so good, baby. I’m so proud of you,”

Y/N’s dap hair is cold against her bare shoulder. Natasha must have put her in the bath.

“What happened?” Y/N asks.

“You squirted everywhere, maluska,”

Y/N looks up from her spot nestled into Natasha.

“I what?” she asks.

Natasha smirks at her before pressing her back into her chest.

“Shhh baby. You did so good,”

Y/N gives up and sinks back into her, inhaling her scent.

“I love you, ‘Tasha,” she mumbles.

“I know you too, Y/N,” Natasha smiles, kissing her head.

They lay like that for a long time before Y/N bolts up, wincing at the pain shooting through her core.

“The camera-”

“Shhh, it’s okay,” Nasha laughs gently, pulling Y;N back down, “You’re famous, baby,”

Y/N blushes at what the video must hold, how desperate she was.

“M-Maybe we can…watch it later?” y?n suggests almost inaudibly.

Natasha’s soft laughter rings through the room.

“Maybe,” she smiles.

Y/N grabs her phone off the nightstand.

“Not right now, baby! You’re still too sensitive,” Natasha explains gently.

“I know!” Y/N responds, clicking the phone on.

Her eyes widen at the amount of notifications and text on her phone. And her number of followers.

“How did I get so many new followers?” she asks, scrolling down.

Her face blushes bright red when she sees the first video pop up, and her eyes linger on the number o

“One and a half milllion vie-”

Taglist:

@liidiaaag

@flourishandblotts-inc

@aagn360

@smromanoff

#mommy kink #littlemissomega #natasha romanoff #natasha romanoff x reader smut #natasha romanoff smut

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jamneuromain · 1 year ago

Text

Revenge Oh So Sweet

Steve Rogers x You (Agent!Reader)

Warning: Revenge (sort of), dick pics, bad language word, fluff? Clintasha if you squint.

Summary: For once, you decide not to put up with this shit anymore.

A/N: Based on the prompt from the bingo challenge. The inspiration came from @rogerswifesblog / @rogerswifesblog-updates (a big smoochie) and my recent experience, there's another experience under the tag #why I hate men. So ... yeah, you get the gist.

Your life-long happiness seems to have been a mutual concern of every Avenger in the compound.

After two not-so-successful relationships and another couple of failed dates, everyone is eager to share their experience or their suggestions as to what could help you find a partner.

"Be yourself." Tony commented on your love life when he accidentally overheard you girls talking in the kitchen, "Trust me, that's how I got Pepper." He said with a smug smile on his face.

Natasha rolled her eyes as Maria tugged the corner of her lips and made a rude - you considered it not so rude, but Tony jumped and felt offended - face.

"Come on, Stark." Natasha huffed out, "That's because Pepper is loyal and devoted. And you can't live without her."

Wanda stayed quiet but nodded like a chicken pecking the grains right in front of her.

"I can introduce the guy working for the IT, nerd, but... cute." Natasha fished out the Instagram of said guy.

Tony grumbled something under his breath as he headed out.

And it was not long before almost everyone on the Avengers team started to give you advices on how to secure a partner/date.

You were nursing over a bucket of chocolate ice cream, your standard medication for sorrows of "not being able to find a boyfriend" the other day when Thor's voice boomed by your ear, "... I am SURE Asgardian warriors would be kneeling at your feet if you could swing the battle sword during a fight."

He smelt like Asgardian mead.

"Thanks, Thor." You appreciated his effort, nonetheless, raising your ice cream bucket for a gestural toast.

Tony snorted at the end of the coffee table, probably having way too much caffeine than he should, and patted Thor on his bicep, "She needs a boyfriend, Point Break, not becoming Arnold Schwarzenegger."

Clint plopped down next to you on the couch, nudging you with his shoulder, gathering your attention, and asked, "Look, why don't you just kidnap some hot dude? That's what Nat almost- HEY!"

He yelled when Natasha threw a couch pillow in his direction, hitting him square in the chest, succesfully shutting him up.

Clint shrugged and gave you a glimpse of sympathy, which you were 99% sure he meant "Sorry kiddo". He shrunk to the corner of the couch, taking a swing of his beer.

"Why not try meeting someone with mutual interest?" Steve carefully pitches his suggestion, he looks at you with a hint of thought, "Like finding someone who shares the same passion over some exercises in the gym."

"Except I'm not a big fan of gyms." You pouted slightly, "But yeah, I guess book clubs and stuff... could work?"

"Gym." Bucky sniggered without even trying to mask his amusement, "Such a Steve thing." After receiving a warning glare from Steve, Bucky moved slightly away from his best pal, and singsongingly added, "I'm sure a candidate is much closer than you'd think."

Sam shook his head. Leaning on the counter of the kitchen, Sam proposed his idea with much delicacy to you, chuckling, "Steve might have a point. You know, maybe get to know your coworker better." Sam said this almost suggestively, a knowing smirk lingering on his lips, "After all, we never frown upon office romance. Not a bad idea to date your coworker as long as they are nice decent people, while you get to have fun."

"Surely redhead is neither nice nor decent." Bucky pointed his finger towards Nat on the far-end chair, whispering loudly.

"Don't get me breaking all your fingers, Barnes. And I'm not only talking about the ones on your right hand." Natasha retorted back, looking as if she was ready to bicker with Bucky again.

Vision, on the other hand, was not comfortable with processing a large conversation with so many participants even though he was able to identify every one of them. However, it was customary for everyone to join the conversation, no matter how they contributed to it. After doing some research in his head, Vision spoke up with confidence, "May I suggest a less time-consuming approach?"

This certainly drew the attention of most people in the room as Rhodey walked in.

"I have been analyzing the data of Miss Y/L/N, and I have come up with a list of results. It is a list of possible partners of Miss Y/L/N." Vision gave some time for this information to sink in before starting the list, "On top of the list, data run came back with a 99.7% matching rate to a book named-"

"A book?" Tony almost sprang from his seat, "HOLD ON. Hold on, for a minute here." He raised his index finger shushing everyone in the room, "What's the book?"

After hearing his question, the room fell into a unison of grumbles. "Seriously Tony?" "You're interested in that book? There's something wrong with..." "Ask him to take another look at the data for Christ's sake-"

Tony rolled his eyes in the most elegant way, "Fine. Vision, would you please erase all lifeless forms of matching in your database and focus on possible 'human' partners?"

A few seconds gone with Vision processing the data in silence, before speaking up, "I have now entered the condition of 'human partner', and the first person with a 99.4% matching rate is Andy Barber, lawyer-"

Gasps and murmurs swirled over the room again.

"...he lives in Newton, Boston, Massachusetts. According to data, he is married to Laurie Barber. Being the leading character of the crime fiction Defending Jacob-"

You would prefer to be drowned in your chocolate ice cream than to have Vision pairing you with a fictional character - even if it's a fictional character that is played by a very handsome actor in the TV series.

That you probably watched more than a dozen times. But still! Fictional!

Rhodey murmured to Tony: "And that's why we still wouldn't apply AI to our weaponary program..."

You groaned in agony, "Vision, I adore you, really. But I really need you to stop-"

"Ya-Da-Ya-Da-Ya-Da-" Tony cut through your sentence, "Vision, no fictional characters, we need real men-"

"Or woman." Wanda squeaked, clearly more amused than everyone else in this room.

"Or woman. Thank you, ponytail," Tony cleared his throat, "Someone who is actually living on the planet right now-"

"Recalculating. Ari Levinson Kidron, former Mossad agent. He is 99.3% compatible. He was renowned for Israel's Operation Moses and Operation Joshua from 1984 to1985."

"Eighties?" Bucky chimed in with mischief sparkling in his eyes, "How old is he?"

"He is currently 78 years old. A movie based on him was released in 2019, starring an actor named Christopher Robert Evans." Vision replied, "Your Netflix history clearly shows a tendency toward strong powerful men with romantic gestures during dating."

You buried your head as deep as the ice cream bucket allowed, "Please, Vision, I'm begging you. Don't leak anymore of my browsing history before I decide to jump into the Hudson River."

Wanda shook her head lightly at Vision, the latter seemed to gain a hint of realization after a while, "Sorry. I have been intrusive. My deepest apologies, Miss. Y/L/N."

You waved your hand in the air to indicate "all is well", but your eyes were still staring into the brown-ish ice cream, which had started to melt.

Shit.

Wanda scooted closer to you, holding her phone in front of your face, she seemed optimistic about what had just happened (even though you were devastated and actually considering being single for the rest of your life).

"What about dating apps?" She showed you a few, swiping men's profiles for you to see, "It's definitely simpler than asking some random people. You can also tell them at the start that you are looking for serious relationships, rather than sex."

Actually, that sounded...

"Thank you, Wanda." You shot her an appreciatiating look.

That sounded like the most solid suggestion anyone has ever made. Especially with the match-making plan of Natasha and the nerdy guy didn't work out, you were willing to try Tinder. Or something similar.

Wanda gave you an encouraging smile, before hugging you on the shoulder and helping you start your own profile on some app. While Sam half-dragged Steve out of the living room, mumbling something about "bats".

After a couple dozen men who wanted "something casual, sorry" and a disastrous night, you scrolled through your dating app to see if anyone has messaged you last night.

You were on an all-nighter mission with your teammates. Due to an unfortunate incident, you had to chase the criminal for about twelve blocks. On foot.

Just got your phone back from your locker, you sagged down on one of the empty chairs by the mission dispatch center, and scrolled through your dating app.

Daveid757: Hi.

You clicked on his profile picture.

"Daveid" is a decent-looking guy with a thin beard and hazel-brown eyes. Tall and broad-shouldered, he held a few 10-foot-long fish in half of his pictures and his different fishing rods in the rest.

Not bad, at least.

You returned to the chatting screen.

[Daveid757 typing]

You should probably say hi back.

Daveid757 stopped typing.

And the next thing you know, a dick pic that took up almost half of your phone screen attacked you right in the face.

A dick.

A at-first-sight-it-was-five-inch-but-some-skin-and creases-are-repetitive-so-it-was-at-most-a-two-inch dick.

A naked dick and his naked thigh.

A tiny but photoshopped dick.

You began to wonder what should you reply at this point.

You sure it's not two inches? No. Basically harmless to a guy who sends dick pics.

Fuck off you prick. No. That came off too strong.

How about I've seen bigger? That could probably trigger his competitiveness, though. You were hoping for something that could make him as furious as how you felt when you received his dick pic.

The sickness of getting a genitalia photo, the rage of being disrespected by men, the grumpiness from your staying up all night, and the frustration of knowing that the "dating app" method was a bust, all united as one .

Although you knew your blood was boiling from all four emotions, they were helpful too, enlightening you with a brilliant idea.

You should get a Nobel Peace Prize for it.

You searched "dick" and selected a dick pic that looked significantly larger and thicker than the one Daveid sent you.

Your dick pic is smooth and pink, clean-shaven, and with a man's hand gripping the foreskin, revealing the angry red tip.

This one looked much better than his.

You looked at this dick pic fondly.

And sent it to him.

Daveid757: You fucking crazy motherfucker.

Daveid757 has blocked you.

His profile picture turned grey, just like the type of picture people will put in front of his casket during his funeral.

Out of nowhere, a surge of euphoria washed over you. Having you doing your best to maintain a calm presence. You try your best not to smirk or giggle, trying your best to keep your lips between your teeth, biting the inside of your mouth from hollering out laughter.

Yeah, you definitely like "your" dick pic better.

While the two dick pics stayed on your screen.

Peacefully. Paying each other respect.

"Hey Y/N," holding his first cup of coffee in hand, Steve emerged behind you in his full tactical suit. He still had an hour before his mission and he decided not to board the jet without a healthy caffeine dose at 5:32 am. He saw you from the break room across the hall, and he just had to say hello to you.

Professional. This is purely professional courtesy!

You seemed undisturbed, gazing into your phone, with a smile ghosting your lips.

Naturally, Steve trotted near, earning a peek to your phone - he didn't intend to be sneaky about it, he only wanted to know what was mesmerizing you - while sipping down some hot hot burning lava hot coffee and -

You're looking at dicks???

"Oh my - Steve! Are you alright?" Shoving your phone into your pocket, you found some Kleenex in your bag and put it into Steve's hand. He choked and coughed violently, whole face flushed red as he waved his hand, stepping away from you, continuing coughing his lungs out.

You were struggling to understand whether he means "No, I'm not alright" or "No, I don't need the Kleenex" or "No, everything is alright". Though you didn't know how the last one worked the way inside your head.

Steve calmed himself after coughing into his palms some more. Shaking his head but accepting your tissue paper: "Yeah I'm - EHEM - 'm fine." Dabbing his suit which now has coffee splatters over his chest, he muttered an almost inaudible "Thank you".

He didn't look you right in the eyes when he was busy cleaning up his mess, but he felt like he had to when he should talk to you about workplace ethics. He finally looked up from the ground with his baby blue orbs, and tried to sound serious with his ears and cheeks blushing: "Y/N, I'm not ... " he winced, "You know I'm not that type of person who ummm... tries to dictate what others do or don't."

"Like Tony?" You scoffed, but the scoff was more directed to Tony rather than Steve. God, you should know better than to let Tony participate in your love life, giving out advices.

Steve manages a smile witth difficulty, "I'm not, but ... I don't ... I would consider ... I uh - I believe genital photos are not workplace appropriate."

You choked out a laugh, fishing your phone from your pocket and showing him, "What, this?"

"God, please, Y/N." He blocked your screen with his leather-gloved hand, becoming visibly more nervous, blurting out but his tone appears to be more begging than commanding, "Not ... here!"

You giggled. The few hours of sleep you had while you were on the plane back from the mission had led you to an unstable mindset. It would be completely insane for the "normal" you to show Steve Rogers, a work fellow, dick pics. But right now? With all those emotions boiling down your veins, the lack of sleep (and apparently, the lack of clear sense) and the sudden euphoria of making Steve nervous, you were feeling bold. Audacious. Felt like you could conquer the world and slam a monster silicone dildo right onto Daveid's face.

So you apologized, though not with much sincerity, and told Steve why you were "watching dick pics" on your phone in your workplace.

"He started it!" After accusing Daveid of sending you dick pics, you whined like a grumpy child, which you definitely wouldn't, if you were not sleep-deprived, but Steve felt like the most trustworthy male person on the planet at that moment, so you spilt your guts and tried to excuse yourself out of the workplace ethics violation that Steve nearly had you reported to HR.

He almost would never. Report you to the HR. But he kept that to himself.

"And it's not my dick. I suppose it's not entirely my fault?"

Steve chuckled soundlessly. It was in fact, adorable for you trying and whining, "Even if it is your dick, you don't send him that until you're out of the compound, okay?"

"I don't have a dick!" You huffed out in a hush voice. Seeing his typical look, the look with the raising eyebrows that says "yes, and-", you put up your hands in defeat, "Okay-Okay. You have a point. No dick pics."

"More like no dating apps scrolling while you're at workplace, just in case." Steve was amused. He thought for a while before making amends, "Tell you what, there's a nice little place in Brooklyn. You free tonight at 7? I'll wine and dine you, and you can tell me about all the awful macho men you've encountered. Promise, no judging."

He looks at you, almost sympathetically, with his crystal blue eyes, making your breath hitch in your throat.

You lowered your head, pretending you need to find your bag before summoning up the courage and shrugging, playing it cool, "Deal, Captain. Be ready for some of the worst men you've ever heard of."

After some most amazing medium rare steak and two glasses of fine-aged red, you were beyond caring (about your little crush of the handsome blonde sitting across you) and exchanged laughs and giggles that were definitely way too loud for a decent date.

You attracted attention, being the most stunning couple in the restaurant (so the "couple" word maybe a little too "ouchy" for you, since you normally spent time admiring Steve from afar), and some glances from other customers were casually thrown this way.

You had to admit, watching Steve in a brown leather jacket and jeans, triggered something inside you that encouraged you to climb him like a tree and slam your lips over his.

Steve chuckled, covering his lips with his fist, temporarily blocking his seductive (and to you, sinning) grin, "I can't believe Daveid is actually nicer among all the douches you've dated. Being a long-term friend of yours, I'd suggest you not to pick up men from dumpsters."

You cast a sour look in his direction, raising the glass to your lips, taking a small sip from the third cup of wine, "I would if I could." Your glass landed on the table with a bit too much force. Faking annoyance, you groaned at the ceiling, "Men are just ... awful."

"Touche." He murmured over his glass, clicking it with yours before downing a big gulp. Feeling bolder than usual, he looked at you right in the eyes, hoping he would convey a message, a hint, anything, "Surely ... there are a few good men out there. But, 80% of them are plain stupid, you know? You gotta ... I don't know, it's not about trying harder, I guess, but ... open to other ... options?"

You snorted, leaning back onto the comfy chair, teasing him, dipping your toes in the water for a second, "Oh, you're spoiling me and trying to get me zero dates in my future since you raised the bar too high, Captain."

He looked more jumpy and edgy after your "captain" comment. His ears and cheek turned pink under the dim yellow restaurant light, "I'm certain that you can have a boyfriend in the future that would be ... nice, to say the least. Apart from your lapse of judgment on this guy," he couldn't help but let slip of his smile, "you have some good friends and I'm sure you'll go on a date with someone better than him, someone better for your relationship, and more deserving for you."

You feigned a gasp of shock, "Are you calling yourself "better"? So competitive, Captain Rogers."

His fluster-ness drained from his face all of a sudden, slightly narrowing his eyes to focus on someone behind you, "I think - Is that ...?"

"What?" You were bewildered.

"The ass who sent you the dick pic." He shifted his focus back to you, "Your four o'clock. Black suit, Caucasian male, 5'7''. He's not looking this way but I'm positive he's the guy."

You spared a glance at him quickly. He did look like "Daveid757" and his profile pictures.

"Fucking hell." You muttered.

"You know what would make him furious? Letting him see you're having the best time of your life." Steve placed his palm on your wrist, giving you warmth and support, "Letting him know what he has missed out."

"Flip my hair and giggle?"

Your words didn't mean to be sarcastic, but they sure came out this way.

"Or we could return to the compound to suit up." Steve kindly offers, "I'll beat his ass until he learns a lady is supposed to be respected."

You drained your wine, teasing him with a dash of liquid courage, "Revenge doesn't suit you, Cap." And I don't want you to get into trouble, even if it is a tempting gesture. You swallowed the latter half of your sentence.

And of course, you had a much better plan...

"Is he looking this way now?" You moved to the seat by Steve's side, making sure Daveid could turn his head and see you with little effort. "Accidentally" having your wine class clatter with your ceramic plate, you made a loud noise for the entire restaurant to hear.

"Yeah but-"

The rest of his words fell on deaf ears, as you cupped his chin and kissed him.

His lips were soft. Grape-flavored with a bitter taste of alcohol. The kiss was sweet, tender, careful even, as he reciprocated your small nibbling, threading his fingers with the base of your hair.

Your liquid courage burnt down faster than you had imagined. Burying your face into his chest, you were rid of all the strength you had to check Daveid - or Steve, for that matter, because on second thought, using Steve to get back at Daveid wasn't such a good idea if Steve misunderstood your feelings as a method to get even with the dick pic dude -

"I hope you haven't fallen asleep, because that guy looked like he could swallow his wine glass. And he broke his plate, dragging his date to leave but - oh ho, now the waiter is asking him to pay for the plate and the wine -" Steve sounded normal, unaffected, calm. On the contrary, you wanted to jump into the Hudson River right this second for kissing Steve and wash off all the embarrassment and nervousness.

"I suppose you need to get some air and not suffocate yourself in my jacket?" He joked, patting on your back almost in a comforting way, while you were still buried into his chest, "Don't worry, the Daveid guy made a bigger scene and now he got kicked out of this place."

Your hair must be awful. The move messed up your hair, and your lipstick no doubt. And ruining your make-up. And you couldn't face Steve knowing that you kissed him and this - you are going to be a joke to the whole compound within 48 hours.

"But if you don't say another word for five seconds, I'm going to presume that you are losing consciousness and perform CPR in front of the whole restaurant."

You sat up reluctantly, wiping the outline of your lips and possible lipstick smudge without a mirror. Pouting.

"Or how about being my fake girlfriend for five minutes and we will show Daveid that we are a happy couple?" Steve observed your expression, making yet another proposal.

He was sweet. He was really sweet offering all these choices for you and your pathetic dating app experience but all you wanted was - "How about being real girlfriend." You grumbled under your breath.

"Sorry?"

"Never mind." You shook your head and decided to put this delightful dinner time behind you, "Let's -"

"You mean it?"

"Huh?"

His crystal blue eyes searched your features, searching for signs that you wanted him, wanted this, wanted you two to be a thing. It was cliche and a chance in a million, having his friend -you falling in love with him, but so were myths and superheroes. He liked his odds.

"Would you," He spoke, painfully slow, "like to be my girlfriend? Not because of revenging. But because I want it to work. Because I love you and I want to kiss you. Because you feel the same way, and finally, you can help put my misery of seeing you dating other people to a stop. I want to date you," he thought for a small while before adding, "exclusively."

The sun must be rising from the west, or the sea must be pouring back into rivers, or the dead must be alive from their graves.

A most-amazing miracle was happening.

Because the next thing you knew, you nodded and he pulled you into his warm hug.

And offered you one of his many sweet, sweet kisses.

Bonus:

You sneaked back to the compound, holding hands, grinning like fools, feeling like the first day of being in love.

You walked past the living room with Vision in the corner still knee-deep in his thoughts, calculating, or searching.

"It seemed the most fitting human candidate is Captain Steve Rogers, with a 99.2% match." The sudden voice startled you both, but Vision raised his head and greeted you, "Ah. I see that my data is no longer needed. Congratulations on finding a perfect partner, and good night, to you both."

You whispered a "Night" as Vision drifted towards his chamber.

Turning around when you noticed Steve went silent, you saw him scratching the back of his head, just a little bit annoyed.

"I rank behind a book and two fictional characters?"

#steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x you #steve rogers fluff #steve rogers fanfiction #captain america x reader #captain america x you #captain america fluff #captain america fanfiction #agent!reader

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littleseasiren · 1 year ago

Text

Wait you love me?

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Warnings: Angst, a bit of language, then fluff

Words: Just over 900 words

A/N: Welcome to day 3 of Flufftober. Prompt: "Wait you love me?" "I always have". Thanks @flufftober for this interesting challenge. Please let me know if you want to be added or removed from my tag list. Thanks for reading!

The drive home from the restaurant was quiet - too quiet. You had a magical night with Bucky, having fun watching a movie and then a lovely dinner at a sophisticated restaurant that Bucky had chosen. He knew you didn't need anything fancy, but he still went out of his way to spoil you often. The evening was going perfectly until it wasn't anymore.

Your dessert had just been placed in front of you when it started. You were having a slice of cheesecake while Bucky chose a chocolate lava cake when it happened. Bucky was giving you a bite of his dessert when a group of young men walked in and took the table next to you. When they saw Bucky's metal arm, they started whispering between themselves. It had taken you and the others months to get Bucky comfortable without wearing gloves, only for this one moment to ruin all his hard work accepting his metal arm.

At first, Bucky pretended he couldn't hear their whispers, but as their voices grew louder, even you could hear them commenting on Bucky's history as the Winter Soldier. You wanted to kick their ass, but Bucky begged you to ignore them. He didn't want to make a scene and asked you not to either. The two of you quickly finished your desserts, Bucky paid, and now you were stuck in a car so thick with silence, that you felt like you might choke on it.

"Bucky, those guys don't have any idea what they're talking about, don't let it go to your head. You're not him anymore."

"Hmm," Bucky mumbles, eyes focusing on the road ahead. His hands grip the steering wheel so tight that you're afraid he'll snap it right off.

Not knowing what to do, you try to give him space to calm down.

"Bucky, talk to me," you ask as you help him take off his suit jacket.

The two of you are back in your shared room, alone at last. Sometimes it's difficult staying in the tower with the other Avengers, everyone wanted to know how your date went, what you did, things like that. They genuinely wanted to know if you had fun, but you just wanted to get your boyfriend alone.

"There's nothing to talk about, doll. Everything is fine," Bucky says softly as he turns and starts unbuttoning his shirt. He's turned away from you, but you can still hear the hurt in his voice.

"Everything's not fine. I know you, Bucky. I don't want to push you -"

"Then don't! I told you, I'm fine!" Bucky barks out, his brows lowered and lip set in a harsh line as he throws his shirt on the chair. He sits down on the side of the bed and starts removing his shoes.

"The hell you are! I don't know what they said but I know you heard it and that it's going to your head, making you question everything." You stand in front of him, still wearing all your clothes, not willing to back down from this.

Bucky's anger disappears almost instantly. "Exactly, you have no idea what they said." He lowers his head as he takes a deep breath. When his eyes meet yours, they are cold and full of determination.

"This is just becoming a bit much, I thought I was ready for a relationship but I guess not." When your brows narrow in confusion, he looks away instantly.

"This is becoming too much? You mean me?" You feel like your heart is breaking, as moisture gathers on the corners of your eyes.

"I mean this relationship." When he won't look at you, you feel the first tear drop down your cheek. Things had been going great between you two. How could he say that to you now? No, you won't accept this.

"Bullshit!" You lunge for him, hitting him on the chest when he stands up to stop you. "You don't get to decide that! I don't care what those men said, I'm not letting you leave me!"

Bucky grabs your arms, holding them still so you'll stop pounding on his chest. "I care! I'm not good enough for you, you should find someone else to be with. Someone better!"

"There's no one better for me Bucky! Why are you saying this?" Your tears are running freely now, his words hurting more than you can take.

"Because I love you! You deserve the world, not some assassin with seventy years of blood on his hands!"

You still in his arms, his words sinking in slowly. "Wait, you love me?" You meet his tired gaze, daring him to take back his words.

"I always have." He says it so simply, like it's the one truth he is sure of in his life.

"Bucky, I love you too. I don't want to be with anyone else. You are the man I love, this Bucky. I don't care what happened in the past, I just want to be part of your future." When he lets go of your arms, you gently cup his cheek, sighing with relief when he rubs against your hand.

"Say it again? Please?" His arm wraps around your middle, pulling you closer to his strong body.

You gaze deep into his blue eyes, letting him see the truth in your eyes. "I love you, Bucky. And you love me. I'm not going to let anything keep us apart."

"I love you so much, doll. I never meant to hurt you, I'm so sorry," he says as he pulls you onto the bed next to him. You lay beside him, willing to take anything the world throws at you, as long as he keeps loving you.

@morganmofresh

@dottirose

@cjand10

@buggy14

@crazyunsexycool

@tripleoyaa

@mandijo17

@fluffysucker

@moviegurl2002

#flufftober2023 #flufftober #day 3 #marvel mcu #james bucky buchanan barnes #bucky barns x reader #bucky x y/n #bucky fanfic #bucky fluff #bucky angst #james barnes #bucky x reader

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stevesbestgirl · 2 years ago

Note

It is so damn cute watching the other littlest look after the little baby reader.

Like the one with the football game. How little Peter looks after her. That was adorable!!! I couldn’t stop smiling.

I do like how they regress to a younger age.

Would love to see more little baby reader with more cute scenes with her daddies but also the other littles and caretakers.

Headphones put on her when it gets loud. Maybe at a gala and telling a loud douche to be quiet. (Badarse scary protective mom Nat).

Please please would you write more protective badarse stucky.

How would all the avengers especially stucky and maybe even the other littlest react if the baby reader was taken? After all the others are littles but still heroes while baby doesn’t have any powers (or does she) ;) 😂. Seriously though imagine the littles all finding out baby has been taken and then the door where the others are opens and the littles are no long littles but pissed off Loki. Scarlett witch , Spider-Man etc.

So sorry for writing so much. Just really love your fics. Can’t wait for any more you write. I hope you have a lovely day ��

Ohmygosh, this is so sweet, please don't apologize! I love hearing what people like about Their Girl 🥰🥰

I don't usually do requests, but your ideas are great and I got a little inspired ❤️

Safe

Daddy!Stucky x little!f!reader

2989 Words

Warnings: brief swearing, crybaby reader (as always), sfw age regression

In the early days, you never left the compound; your daddies were protective. They didn't want anything bad to happen to you- or for you to run into someone who might recognize you; that could be just as damaging to all the work they'd done to make you happy.

But eventually, as trust built, they started taking you out in public. First the zoo, like they'd promised, and then other places. Soon, you were allowed to tag along when they went grocery shopping and trips to the park become normal. You even had a special day at the mall with Steve.

You trusted all of the adults to keep you safe while out and about; you remembered one of Tony's fancy parties where a man had drank so much that he was shouting, despite the soft music and low hum of chatter in the room. Bucky had only agreed to bring you to that party because Tony promised it would be quiet. But the man was determined to be heard by the pretty girl he was talking to, though she didn't seem to want to talk to him.

You knew your daddies were close by, so you tried to be brave, politely tugging on his jacket and asking him to use his inside voice. But the girl saw her opportunity to leave, disappearing while his back was turned and then he got annoyed.

"Who brought a fuckin' kid to this party?" he called out to the room, making you shrivel beneath all the attention he was drawing. "Honestly, can't a guy even get laid-"

It wasn't Bucky, or even Steve, who marched over and put themselves between the two of you, it was Natasha. "You need to tone it down."

The man had smirked, giving her an obvious look up and down, "That's not the only thing that could stand to go down." He clearly thought himself quite smooth.

When she didn't fall down at his feet, he added, "Why? This yours?" He tipped his chin derisively at you, scorn plain in his tone. You winced; you didn't understand why he was being so mean, but you knew he was.

"She's not the problem here." You knew Natasha's warning voice well enough to recognize it, but this man was either too drunk, too stupid, or too distracted by her pretty face to notice.

"She's a problem for me." He reached in your direction, like he was going to push you away, drawing a resigned sigh from Nat.

Natasha caught his arm, twisting it to a funny angle and making the man cry out, "Then I guess I'm your problem too."

By then, Steve had noticed, steering you away and shielding you from the ruckus, but you peeked out just in time to see Nat take the man down, not even mussing her hair. Steve stayed close for the rest of the night, thinking you were traumatized, but you were really in awe of Natasha. Looking at your daddies, it was obvious they could protect you. But Natasha was much tougher than she looked and she hadn't hesitated to step in to keep you safe.

You had murmured a shy thank you to her later in the evening, to which she smiled, "Of course, dovey. We take care of our kids, don't we?" She'd kissed your forehead and you realized that you were part of their family; they would all take care of you, just like they did their own babies.

The adults had collectively decided that taking more than one baby out at a time warranted at least two caregivers. They weren't taking risks with such precious cargo after all.

Generally, things went smoothly. Surprisingly, Loki was the one who tended to get into trouble when out and about, but you were still very grateful to be allowed; you weren't about to rock the boat now. Not that good intentions would keep you out of trouble.

You hadn't meant to wander off in the store, but it wasn't like you went out often- you'd forgotten how easy it was to get swept up in the crowd. Especially with Thor and Tony as chaperones; Thor's supervision wasn't quite as comprehensive as many of the others and Tony tended to get distracted by Peter. It wasn't until you were shuffled away from the group, distracted by the pretty backpacks on display, that you realized they were gone.

Looking up from a sequined one you'd been admiring, you realized you were all alone. You'd always heard that you should stay put when you were lost, but that seemed kind of silly. After all, you knew you'd been with the group back by the clothing, so you shouldered the backpack you wanted and made your way back there.

But there was no sign of any of them. And now you were a little scared; when was the last time you were alone outside the compound? Just asking yourself the question unearthed the faint memory of your nightmares, which hadn't plagued you for quite a while now.

With a whimper, you climbed inside the clothing rack; it was stuffed full and provided excellent cover for someone who didn't want to get grabbed by a stranger. You camped out among the clothes for a few minutes- only long enough to realize that if someone had come back to look for you, they wouldn't know you were here. So you cautiously climbed out, keeping an eye out for any kidnappers.

You waited again, but what if they'd come to check for you while you were hiding? You might have missed them. Or what if they hadn't even noticed you were gone? What if they left without you?

You knew you shouldn't go out in the parking lot alone; you were supposed to hold someone's hand. You weren't even sure you remembered where the van was parked. But the little voice in your head insisted that if you weren't by the car when they came out, they would leave you behind.

Looking carefully both ways, you took a step into the lot, but you were quickly pulled back, an unfamiliar voice barking, "Where do you think you're going?"

Wheeling around, you were gazing at a grumpy-looking security guard whose badge read "Bennett." Locating your voice, however muted, you answered, "I got lost."

"Mm. And I take it you were going to pay for that bag too?" He didn't sound particularly accommodating.

"I don't have any money, but-"

"I thought so," he grunted. "Come with me."

Far be it from you to argue with a security guard; your daddies had told you to be wary of strangers, but there were no other grown ups around. So you tearfully followed Officer Bennett back inside and through a set of double doors. Behind those, everything was gray and dirty- it wasn't pretty like the rest of the store. But he kept walking, towing you firmly by the arm until you were in a tiny security office.

Entranced by the wall of TVs, you forgot you were in trouble until he snapped his fingers, "Sit down." You dropped into the chair against the wall.

He stood while you sat, hands planted on his hips, looking down his nose at you; he thought you were a thief. But nothing you said made a difference; he had an answer to everything, a way you could have been lying. He started asking for your information: your name, your birthday, where you lived. But you knew you weren't supposed to tell him those. So you told him that.

"I'm not supposed to talk to strangers."

His face twisted into a mocking sneer, "You've got to be kidding me."

Missing the sarcasm, you shook your head earnestly, "I promise I wasn't tryin' to steal-"

"I don't want to hear it. Unless you're going to tell me your name, I don't want to hear a peep out of you."

Intimidated by his bad attitude and his badge, you went quiet. You sat in the uncomfy, wooden chair, kicking your feet and watching the security cameras. You were compliantly quiet, at least until you saw a familiar face on one of the many screens. "Wanda!"

"That your name?"

"No, but-"

"Don't care then."

"But-"

"Shut up."

Surprised, you replied again, voice thick, "That's mean."

"Don't care." He turned back to his computer, making a pointed effort to ignore your sniffles and hiccups as they became more and more pronounced.

You debated about running away, but you weren't super like everyone else; you couldn't do anything. The small amount of relief granted by the knowledge that they hadn't left you behind- at least, not yet- didn't comfort you in the face of utter helplessness.

You tried to stay quiet while you cried, finding Wanda on the cameras again. You could at least keep an eye on her. Wanda looked right into the camera and you wanted to believe that she saw you, but you knew that wasn't how cameras worked. You watched her lean over and mutter something to Peter, who, in turn, whispered something in Loki's ear. You couldn't see Tony or Thor on the screen anywhere.

You did a quick scan of the other monitors for the grown ups and when you returned to Wanda's, she was gone and so were the others. You'd lost them.

You tried to swallow the lump in your throat before speaking, "What's gonna happen to me?"

"Don't know."

"Am I goin' to jail?" Would Steve and Bucky be able to find you if you got arrested?

"Maybe." He sounded like he was entertaining the idea.

That prompted you to cry in earnest- you didn't want to go to jail. You could usually admit when you'd done something wrong, but everything that had happened today was an accident. You were a good girl.

Your internal monologue cut short at a knock on the door. With a heavy grunt, Officer Bennett heaved himself out of his chair and opened it, positioning himself between you and the other side, so you couldn't see past him. Whatever he saw on the other side gave him pause, then he slipped through the gap in the door and closed it behind him.

You were alone in the security office. And Officer Bennett had left his cell phone on the desk.

You scrambled over and were amazed that he didn't have a passcode on it. You remembered Steve complaining about how tedious it was to change that setting. Figuring it was an old man thing, you thanked your lucky stars and managed to open a text chat.

It had been a long time since you used a cell phone for anything other than games or taking pictures and even those typically had Steve or Bucky over your shoulder, telling you what to do. The last time you'd owned a cell phone, holo-screen tech didn't even exist.

You did, however, know your daddies' phone numbers by heart. They were now well versed in positive reinforcement. So you'd gotten a canopy for your bed in return for reeling off their phone numbers without any mistakes after weeks of practice and positive encouragement.

You dialed those numbers with shaky fingers, glancing over your shoulder to make sure the door was still closed. You weren't good at texting, though you dimly remembered being good at it once.

You typed out, "Help." "Scared." You wanted to type "officer," but you couldn't spell it, so you backpedaled, breaths coming faster as fear of being caught settled over your shoulders. You typed the name of the store instead and sent it, even though you knew you'd spelled it wrong.

And then you remembered to send your name as the doorknob rattled, so you only typed half and hit send before tossing the phone back down on the desk and getting back in your chair. You were barely seated when the door opened and an irritated-looking Officer Bennett shuffled back in, still carefully blocking your view. Once the door was closed, he clicked the lock.

He turned around to sit back down and noticed his phone- not even close to where he left it. Slowly turning his head to face you, he asked low, "Did you-"

You were trembling in your seat, but he cut off sharply, head turning to stare at the doorknob, which had started glowing with odd, red light. You were close enough that you could hear the faint clicking of metal on metal.

He looked at you, "What are you doing?" His face paled further as an eerie green glow seemed to seep in through the cracks around the door, "S-stop!"

He shrieked and you ducked your head as the door burst open and hit the wall with a crash. You suspected it had cracked the cement wall behind it.

Tentatively peeking out from under your hands, you squinted at the dust that had come loose at the impact floating through the air. Then Loki stumbled inside, closely followed by Peter and Wanda.

Loki ignored the terrified Officer Bennett, straightening indignantly, "Don't push."

Wanda rolled her eyes, "You were the one who had to be first." She smirked at him, "Feels good to save the day, doesn't it?"

"Why don't you-"

"Guys?" You finally found your voice, though it was still thin and trembling.

"We came to save you," Peter piped up.

"By the gods, what you have you three done?" Thor's voice echoed over Wanda's shoulder, just out of your sight.

Then Tony's voice, "It's bad enough I have to pay these insurance premiums when there's a crisis, now I can't even do my shopping without something getting broken?" You couldn't tell if he was serious or joking.

Tony ushered the others out, extending an arm to you, still in your seat, "C'mon kid, let me sort this out." You hesitantly stood, waiting for the guard to stop you, but it seemed like Officer Bennett was in shock because only Tony spoke, "That's it, come on. Let's get you out of there."

He steered you out of the office and back into the main store with Thor, who hoisted you off the ground and onto his hip, "Trouble always seems to find you, doesn't it, little one?"

You stared at him, suddenly nervous, "Am I in trouble?"

"No, you aren't in trouble. Don't worry, the grown ups are handling it."

Ten minutes later, you were all back in the car. Your backpack had been paid for and was in the trunk with the other bags. Your carseat was in the back row, as Peter's occupied the middle. Loki was in the backseat with you and Wanda in the middle with Peter.

You kept your voice low, hoping Tony and Thor wouldn't hear over the classic rock playing on the radio, "Thanks for saving me." You left a pause before admitting, "I was really scared."

Wanda surprised you by rolling her eyes, "Of course we would never let anyone take you away. You're our friend."

"We love you, pretty girl," Peter added, the only one who was very free with that particular word.

You glanced at Loki, who looked almost guilty, giving you a reluctant nod, his cheeks flushed silver.

You smiled and nodded, settling back into your seat and contemplating a nap. But Tony pulled off the highway early, stopping at a little diner. You were allowed to unbuckle yourself, so you climbed out of the van with the others, staying close by while Tony got Peter out too.

"Uncle Tony, are we having dinner?" Wanda chirped.

"I was thinking about it, but if you guys aren't hungry-"

Wanda took the bait, "I am! But what about Mommy?"

"You can bring something back for her, sound fair?"

You tugged on Tony's sleeve, "Me too?"

"You want to bring something back to Natasha?"

"Uh-uh, for my daddies."

"No need, squirt." He pointed behind you and you saw Steve and Bucky coming up the sidewalk from Steve's car parked a few spaces down.

"Papa!" You took care to get on the sidewalk before running over to them and jumping into Steve; you weren’t taking any chances on getting in trouble for running in a parking lot. But you hadn't realized how badly you needed to see them after something like that until they were there to make it better. You were safe with your friends, but things were better with your daddies around.

Steve held you like he'd had a scary afternoon too, pressing a frantic kiss to your forehead and holding your head tightly into the crook of his neck while he hugged you, "My sweet girl, are you alright?"

You nodded, "It was scary, but Wanda and Peter and Loki saved me."

Steve buried another kiss in your cheek, "Lucky for that security guard they did, or he would've had to deal with me-"

"Steve, it's done. Tony handled it," Bucky reminded him.

Steve grunted his understanding, a sure sign he disagreed but couldn't be bothered to argue; he had his baby back now.

Bucky leaned in to kiss your forehead too, "Let's get you something to eat, hm? Being a felon is hungry work- I'd know."

Steve rolled his eyes and Bucky grinned. Peter chimed in, reminding the three of you that everyone else was waiting, "We can get lots of food, my daddy is paying."

Thor cheered, which prompted Wanda and Peter to copy him, drawing a laugh from Steve.

"You know Pete, I'm starting to think you're only here for my money."

Peter's indignant reply was the beginning of another tangent, leading to more teasing and more laughter. And as you sat in a too-small booth, sitting on Steve's lap and blowing straw wrappers at Wanda and Loki, you realized that your bad day, as with all the bad days that had come before it, wasn't worth remembering because you were the happiest you could ever remember being.

#daddy!stucky #daddy!stucky x reader #daddy!stucky x little!reader #little!reader #soft!daddy!stucky #soft!dark!daddy!stucky #daddy!stucky fluff #agere #sfw agere

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missmarveledsblog · 2 months ago

Text

It's just pretend right? ( Bucky barnes x reader ) part 6

summary : revelations and secrets are finally revealed as kitty comes to terms with everything she thought she knew and was about to know and well once one avenger is attack well it's an attack on them all as the team visit the ranch .

warnings : this is a happier part sad but happy and sort of goofy

previous part

“ she not the only one , gonna need a little more than that terminator “ tony called his eyes locked on screen as friday was running it’s test on the dart .

“ jessie , he was like her only he knows he’s adopted just not all of it , but her dad he said he was the same as her , it’s not what it looks like he’s not hydra not fully he’s a double agent look it hard to explain either he or fury can explain the dynamics but we’re going to have to run some test make sure he doesn’t burst into flames” bucky explained placing her on the cot .

“ or shooting vines … oh yeah she does that too so i guess we’re going to have to see what else our girl body is hiding from her and us “ tony said as their heads shot in his direction .

“ why couldn’t she be just be the normal one , healthy family life but nope it’s like become an avenger and the trauma follows “ nat mumbled checking over her once more ignoring bucky. “ oh give it over “ she pushed him away .

“ stop fighting over me it gonna give me big ego like stark” she groaned

“ hey Look she ok “ tony rolled his eyes .

“ other than my life was a lie and my brother could be whatever i am what is going on and who is after me “ she sat up as nat and Bucky helped her .

“ well hydra is after You , you brother well who might be your brother is from same lab rest i don't know fury kept his lips tight on this one and well seems as they want you back” tony explained .

“ that is just magical no seriously this fan fucking tastic” she scoffed.

“ maybe let your dad explain “ nat smiled sadly .

“ i will, you wanna Test My blood right ?” She looked to to tony who nodded . “ well lets do this first “ she pulled her sleeve up looking down at her arms remembering what it was that came from them .

“ how did you get your abilities how did they start” tony asked pulling the kit out from .

“ you Dont have to tell him doll” bucky squeezed her should he could feel her tense , could hear the breath that got caught In her throat .

“ no its fine erm my cousin , terror twins we call them well they told me jessie was hurt climbing Into a water tower, they said It was accident but they pushed me in and i thought i was going to drowned … no one was going to find me then it came Like i just felt this feeling like building and building i thought It … It was me dying then boom fire to point all the water turned into steam that steam well Actually did nearly kill me no oxygen And i was in a coma for like a month , they laughed when i cried now everytime I see their stupid faces i remember like im trapped in that water tower “ she sniffled . “ nat and fury only people after family to know that well tony And steve cause a file that wasn't suppose to exist “ she laughed dryly Wiping tears from her eyes .

“ kitty” she turned To see her Dad and maybe he didn't expect it but she ran into his arms . She could see it , see that guilt and yet That Unconditional love in his Eyes .

“ papa you need to tell me the truth The whole truth please” she looked up at him and suddenly it was like looking down at the little girl he put to bed so many times after nightmares or scared of monsters under the bed .

“ best sit down , please know this before i tell you this kitty none of it was fake for me not one second did i think of you any different then my daughter” he smiled sadly .

“ maybe we should give them space to do this “ nat winced , she knew , steve knew and bucky knew .

“ but i wanna … fine” tony pouted following the widow out while bucky squeezed her shoulders .

“ i was in the military that part was true and i was good , so good i caught the attention of shield who wanted me to work for them , it was no brainer whether to take the job or not really it was probably one of quickest yes i said in my life first they told me a baby was found little boy taking out of lab would we care for him and we said yes actually your mother said it we got jessie then a few years later actually jessie was eight and the twin well were 6 and then nick fury came to me a mission so classified that not even the director alexander pierce knew it was going down , he said they found a lab pierce didn’t wanna bother with it but fury well couldn’t let it go so i went undercover pretended i wanted to be hydra said it was the future shit like that , they believed me i’d send in the intel to fury and work in some lab one night they got this woman i and she had most beautiful baby girl i ever seen , the lady fought she said she couldn’t do it again but they killed her so i called fury the raid happened and he slipped me out the back told me take this baby and not to stop for anyone he would come when he could so i did i brought you home and your mama she fell in love with you i went back and we told pierce everything and left out the part of you fury burned the place down so they would think you went with it we got promoted i stayed for couple of years then i retired said i would help with the kids and ranch wanted to watch you grow up and that wasn’t a lie” he looked at her she could see it all in his eyes .

“ why didn’t you tell me , why didn’t fury tell me was that how he found me in new york? “ she asked .

“ i called him new places and that gift of your never did work so i asked him make sure you weren’t locked in a lab somewhere like .. “

“ E.T” She chuckled.

“ jessie mom i don’t know if you both got same mama , she was pretty like you “ he held her face.

“ then how come they won’t accept me ? they accepted jessie ? “ she asked softly .

“ because your grandfather left everything in your name and their vultures …. Thanks young man “ she turned to see tony letting her grandmother in .

“ i like her … shit sorry i leave you too it … touching stuff really sorry for doubting you “ tony waved as he left .

“ stop listening you over grown toddler” she yelled.

“ couldn’t hear you “ his voice rang out over intercom of the jet .

“ this is weird airplane” her grandmother looked around .

“ ok back to it the old guy left everything to her “

“ TONY “

“ Fine i’ll stop listening “ not that she believed that.

“ yes as voice said he left it to you most of it all is a bit of exaggeration some for jess and the twin not the horrible ones cause you guys cared even still you write me every week telling me of your stories although i don’t like the gods part there’s only one of him “ she sat down .

“ maybe wait before bring loki and thor here?” she whispered to her dad who nodded in agreement.

“ that’s why they pushed me in that water tower” she gasped .

“ they heard your grandpa talking with his lawyer “ her dad confirmed .

“ you know no matter what they say your our kitty right? “ her grandmother asked .

“ i do i’m sorry i ran off earlier i mean it’s a lot still in tbh “ she winced .

“ good now go say sorry your poor mother is beside herself in there “ her grandmother swatted her arm sending her to her feet and kept swatting as she walked out the door to the house .

“ hey stop .. can’t get around my ass OWWW … sorry ma’am “ she yelped after the woman pinched her arm . “ stop laughing stank” she grumbled .

She walked into the kitchen and seen her mama sitting and she felt instant guilt yes they did keep a lot from her and yeah she was still right to feel betrayed but giving the other outcome she did really have a great childhood and they didn’t treat her differently even with her gift they still treated her with same love and care probably more so .

“ mama “ she smiled as the woman looked up rushing toward her honestly kitty was surprise how she still had tears left .

“ i’m sorry really baby we just wanted to keep you safe” she cried .

“ i know now , i’m sorry for scaring you … also think your moms more lively then she letting on “ she whispered last part .

“ hey pyro on the prairie your gonna wanna here this “ tony called .

“ jesus what now is my birth parent actually aliens “ she scoffed as she , izzy and her mom walked in just as jack and jessie walked in carrying cassies things .

“ hey good timing this concerns you to … bruce let them have it ?” tony called.

“ hey kiddo you ok “ bruce voice came out the phone .

“ i mean as well as i can come on lay it on me are me and jessie ET” she sighed .

“ actually no your from earth but hey wouldn’t be surprising giving it all really ..”

“ today big little guy “ tony huffed.

“ well you and jessie are sibling you share the same dad , his mom died giving birth and well your actually related to another member of the team “ bruce explained .

“ please don’t say it bucky .. i mean i may be from south but not that far down south “ she grimaced .

“ no it’s not bucky or steve actually it’s nat it would appear you two share same mother “ .

“ holy shit i had dirty dreams about my little sisters sister “ jack blurted out .

“ please say i’m adopted too “ izzy face scrunched up in disgust as she stood away from her twin .

“ your birth father well he was also part of nats life” bruce went more quietly .

“ shit bruce are you my dad” she gasped.

“ do i look old enough to be your…. Nevermind actually turns out alexei shostakov is who your birth father “ bruce called .

“ i did not see that coming “ nat mouth fell open

“ wait the dude that pretended to be your dad then … you have got to be shitting me really? Can we not pretend it was an alien “ she whined.

“ sorry kiddo we’ll see you guys soon “ he hung up .

“ what do he mean see you soon” she turned to tony. “ who’s we “ .

“ the team hey your one of us mean priority is to stop whoever’s after you “ tony shrugged.

“ i knew we had a sisterly bond” nat smirked .

“ so my dad is guy that sold you?” jessie finally spoke up as nat nodded .” what the shit “ he sighed .

“ i know right but you got two adoptive sister lets hope you didn’t have dirty thoughts about nat too “ she winced.

“ nah i like that wanda chick we ain’t related to her in anyway are we?” he asked.

“ ok moving on from that how the hell is alexei my dad?” she asked .

“ i’ll see if yelena can find out” nat pulled out her phone . “ hey lena we got more siblings “ she called walking out the room .

“ really no sign of being et “ she asked .

“ sorry kitty cat “ tony patted her shoulder .

Honestly she couldn’t believe one simple trip home well would result in all of this , nat being her sister and the widows host/adoptive dad being her birth father and her being a lab experiment for hydra just tied it all in a neat bow serious how she wasn’t in a padded room albeit there was still time for that . she also had the team coming to the ranch in matter of hours and now she was hiding in her room trying to make sense of it all .

“ come in “ she called as the knock on her door snapped her from her thoughts

“ just wanted to check see you were ok “ bucky poke his head in .

“ i’m ok i think it still doesn’t feel real like this is so crazy all in a day i find out i’m adopted , nats my sister so is yelena in a way which also mean i’m not even american right? Oh god what is my life” she fell on her bed staring at the ceiling.

“ an your not an alien “ he pointed out .

“ i was kinda hoping for that” she sighed .

“ well turned out alexei volunteered for some red room / hydra thing back in the day before they severed ties now he’s gushing about how his boy and his girls are well you know ” .

“ yeah i think jessie would actually shoot him “ she laughed .

“ he does want to meet you but nat told him that was up to you and to give you time but yelena is on her way “ he said. “ she heard someone attacked and well “

“ she is very all for family “ she nodded.

“ yeah jacks currently have a identity crisis asking is nat his sister too “ he lay beside her.

“ bet you didn’t think this was going to happen when you agree to be my fake boyfriend “ she snorted honestly it had to be a joke right .

“ i was thinking alien too cause doll you are out of this world “ he smirked as she broke out into laughter.

“ oh my god you did not just say that and steve said you were a ladies man sure you weren’t the dork back then “ .

“ you doubting my skills “ he sat up leaning over her .

“ yes after that yess” she laughed alittle and yet she leaned up .

They were mere inches apart before a banging on the door .

“ hey teams here” nat yelled as bucky fell back .

“ COME ON “ she yelled so close and yet so far .

“ we could pretend to be asleep “ bucky groaned getting off the floor .

“ nah nats waiting” she huffed.

“ she’s right i am come onnn” nat sang .

“ to be continued “ she winked before heading out the door .

“ thanks natalia “ bucky groaned as the widow snorted .

“ sorry barnes maybe you can woo my little sister… so fun to say “ she smirked .

part 7

taglist : @vicmc624 @babble28 @scott-loki-barnes @ozwriterchick

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starker-raving-mads · 9 months ago

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For You: Part III

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It was two months since the day Peter Parker's life changed for the second - third - fourth time.

He'd gotten more sleep over the last month than he had in the previous two months. It was partly due to sheer, never-ending exhaustion. His life since taking on the mantle as 'the new Tony Stark' - a title he balked at, mind you - had become pure chaos. At first, it was a relief. The instantaneous knowledge that money was no longer a problem. May could quit her job and devote her time to FEAST, he could complete his honors-GED (which many of the Blipped teenagers had chosen to do) and immediately hop into online college courses at Columbia with Ned and MJ.

Immediately following that relief, though, was his face splashed across every newspaper, tabloid, blog, and TikTok page in America.

He would never say it, and he couldn't prove it, but he was 99% sure it was Pepper's doing. After her initial outburst at the lawyer's offices, he'd hardly heard from her. His lawyers - god, his lawyers - had advised that he shouldn't respond to any comments on the subject of Pepper Potts being snubbed by her husband for Peter's heir status. While she had no legal leg to stand on since Tony's will was air tight and definite, that didn't stop her from digging her claws into all the ways she knew would hurt him.

Every time he saw something outrageous with his face on it on an article somewhere, he had to remind himself that she was grieving and in pain about a perceived betrayal by her husband. Her husband, who was Tony Stark, who did not belong to him.

No matter that the man had figured out time travel for him, had risked the universe, had given him billions of dollars and the most coveted job in the entire world. Tony only gave him this because there wasn't anyone else better that he trusted, but Peter knew that didn't mean he was Tony's true first choice, and he had to squash every niggling feeling and whisper of a thought that said he was. It would only make it hurt more when all he wanted was the pain to stop.

He'd finally found a moment, though, where things weren't quite as bad. He'd recently reconvened with Bucky, Steve, Sam, and Rhodey and they had a steady if not solid pact. They were all unsure of the situation, still, and Peter didn't blame them. He'd been…questioned, more politely than Pepper had done, on how he and Tony's relationship had unfolded.

When he'd explained that he was 14 when he met Mr. Stark, Steve and Bucky both winced, apologizing for the disaster that was Germany but Peter shrugged it off. He really hadn't been hurt and it was a foundational moment for his and Mr. Stark's relationship. He couldn't bring himself to regret it.

After that, they'd had a few meals together, talked more about his life - and theirs, to an extent, though he was far more privy to them than they had been of him.

"He never mentioned you," Steve said, shaking his head, baffled. He held a cool beer in his hand, leaning back from the patio table they had gathered around at the newly rebuilt SHIELD headquarters in upper state New York.

"Oh he mentioned Pete to me all right," Rhodey disagreed before reaching over and ruffling his curls lightly. Peter liked Rhodey, liked how hands-on he was, how relaxed but also somehow by the book, liked his humor. He could see how he and Tony had been such good friends. "But he'd only told me about his 'brilliant new intern'," they all chuckled. "He really kept the whole Spider-Man thing close to the chest."

"I'd asked him to," Peter admitted, peeling the wrapper off of his bottle of lemonade. "First because I was still like so young, yo know? And then later, after a few - pretty major - mistakes I made, I guess he thought I'd proved I was finally ready to be an Avenger."

"Well I never heard Tony trying to recruit anyone," Rhodey commented and they all looked at him quizzically.

Peter let out a single huffed laugh. "Yeah, uh," he tried to keep down the blush rising on his neck. "You remember the day that Mr. Stark proposed to Ms. Potts?" Rhodey and Sam both laughed long and hard.

"Even over in Wakanda we saw that," Sam chuckled. "It was the Tony Stark special - a huge thing wrapped in a tiny, chaotic package. Not unlike yourself," he raised his eyebrows at Peter, who flicked his bottle wrapper at him.

"Pepper had no idea it was coming," Rhodey agreed before taking a long drink of his own beer.

"Yeah, well I don't think Mr. Stark had really…planned it," he grimaced. At their faces, he continued. "He'd taken me up to Stark Tower and gave me this speech about having graduated to the 'big leagues' after my last big wrap up," he shrugged. "He gave me the Iron Spider suit and said I was ready to be an Avenger." He frowned, rubbing at the glue and paper residue on his bottle. "And I told him that I just wasn't ready yet. That I needed to stay in Queens for a while more, be the friendly neighborhood Spider-Man. Help the little guy, you know?" He raised earnest eyes up to the group and they all nodded, slowly. "So I asked him to just keep helping my identity to stay quiet," he shrugged.

"So, then what happened?" Bucky asked, long hair tilting with the rest of his head in curiosity. He didn't speak up often, but when he did, it was always because of something he really wanted to know.

"The next thing I knew I was being ushered downstairs to wait at the car for Happy," he shrugged. "I pulled out my phone and there on live broadcast Mr. Stark was proposing to Ms. Potts at a press conference." He chuckled. "It was - really, really weird."

He expected everyone else to laugh with him, but he was met with contemplative silence. He looked around at each of them before Rhodey finally met his gaze. "What?"

"I think," the older man said slowly, "that press conference was meant to be for your reveal as Spider-Man."

"No way - I mean," he shook his head as the rest of the guys started nodding their heads, agreeing thoughtfully. "He wouldn't propose to her just because - just because I said no to - "

" - to his proposal," Bucky finished.

It was another revelation that Peter could hardly bear the weight of. These things kept stacking and he wasn't sure how to balance all this knowledge he had, about the things Tony had done - and undone - for him. This one, though…this new information didn't hurt, not like the others did.

It actually made a strange amount of sense. At once, it both stung to feel like he was replaced with Ms. Potts so immediately, but also it was like the first fresh breath after being buried underground for so long to know that Peter's answer that day was so important to him that the only thing he could possibly trade it out for in equivalency was getting engaged.

Did this mean that if Peter had said yes Mr. Stark wouldn't have gotten married? It made his head spin, but it also made his heart lighter than it had been in weeks.

Light enough to finally enter the last bastion of refuge that Tony Stark ever took comfort in.

His lab.

Despite being uninhabited for who knew how long, when the familiar glass doors slid open the air wasn't musty, stale, or any such thing. It was as fresh and crisp as it ever was. Off in the corner the long L shaped couch that he and Mr. Stark had often collapsed into opposite ends of, exhausted, lay half-made with fluffy pillows. The coffee pot was empty but clean, and every other available surface covered in notes either figuratively, having been decorated with papers scribbled on with hundreds of lines of equations and code, or literally, like the side of Peter's work station, where he'd dropped to a crouch to finish writing something out when he ran out of paper, mid-idea. He knew he could've just kept writing mid-air thanks to the lab's complete holographic setup, but it wasn't the same as having something solid under your hands.

There was pain in the familiarity of the lab but there was also a feeling of home he hadn't quite gotten the first time he stepped back into his and May's apartment. Plus -

"Hello, Peter."

"Friday!" He exclaimed, smile breaking wide across his face. With a pang, he didn't realize just how much he'd missed the AI until this moment.

"Yes, Peter?" the AI asked, voice warm and if he dared to think it, amused.

"Nothing, nothing, I'm just excited to see you again," he chuckled, hand rubbing at the back of his neck. He started walking around the lab, taking it all in for the first time in what, to him, had been months. The longer he thought about that the more his brow furrowed. "Hey Friday?"

"Yes, Peter? Or would you like me to call you Boss as Tony had?"

"Oh! Um," he shook his head. "No, no Peter's fine, or whatever."

She hummed. "Would it be all right if I picked a name for you, Peter? Being able to distinguish between Boss and Others by a more specific title helps me with my internal hierarchy and understanding of individuals. If you would prefer I do not, though, merely say such."

"I mean if it helps you then, yeah, sure I guess."

"Thank you, Mini Boss," she said. He laughed again.

"You might wanna work on that," he smiled wide.

"Yes, I think it might take me some time, Father."

His eyes widened. "Father?"

"Hm, you're right," she said. "Boss was more like my Father, I suppose."

"Uh, yeah, definitely," Peter nodded. He gave her a beat to let her figure out what she wanted to call him as he walked over to his desk. He'd let her go through her process before he started asking the questions that sat burning in his mind.

"Would you be opposed to me calling you Mother, Peter?" Friday asked. He spun in his chair, smile wide again.

"If Tony was your Father, wouldn't he also be your Mother?" he asked, amused. "You know, having done 100% of your coding, and all."

"If one were to look at my original codebase as the only part of what makes me, me," she agreed. "However, would you not say that those that raise you are more worthy of such a title rather than just those that created you?"

He immediately thought to May and how, if he'd been younger when he came to her, he'd be calling her by that name.

"That's true enough, sure."

"And outside of Boss," she went on, "you are the individual most involved in my growth. So it stands to reason that if Boss is Father, then Peter is Mother."

"I - " he really didn't know what to say to that. It had never occurred to him that outside of Mr. Stark he was the one who interacted with Friday the most.

"If you would prefer I find a name not so closely connotated with females," she continued, "I can endeavor to do so."

"No, no, it's fine, Friday," he replied, quiet and in his head again. "You can - can call me Mother if you want." A not-so-small part of him felt absolutely, transparently happy that Friday considered him her parent. More than Mr. Stark leaving him the company, more than having all this financial security and ability to mess around with Tony Stark's labs, more than all of that - this meant something profound to him.

"I also thought," she said and that amusement was hinted at in her lilting Irish, "that it would be a nice subversive reference to the spacecraft from Alien."

He laughed out loud at that. "I love that movie, that's perfect."

He could feel her smile, then. "I know you do, Mother."

He slumped onto the stool at his table in the lab and finally asked his question. "Friday, can you tell me - why isn't the lab more different?"

"Different how?"

"Well it's just," he struggled to articulate the sentence, the feeling he was pulling at. "I was - gone - for five years. But it almost looks like this place never really changed?"

"I see," she said. "Boss spent a lot of time here after the Blip first happened, once he was home from Titan. He slept primarily on the couch in the corner and had me refill his coffee orders more than anything else. However, he never touched your things, Mother."

Peter frowned. "Why?"

"I could not say," she replied, tone ponderous. "Based on his patterns of movement, he seemed to specifically avoid your work areas. Though he did take a jacket you had left at her table to the couch. From my archival footage, he seemed to sleep with it, perhaps for warmth?"

It occurred to the teen, then, that Friday probably had thousands and thousands of hours of Tony on video and he could pull it to watch them at any time. The feeling of want was a fever in his blood and he asked, "Can you show me?"

"Of course, Mother."

Faint blue light lit up the couch and Peter walked over to it, seeing that more than merely just show him the video, she played it out in holographic projection. His breath hitched as Tony walked into view, Peter's hoodie in clutched in his hands. Staring down at it, he slumped onto the couch and brought the fabric to his face. Less breathing it in and more suffocating himself with it.

"I'm sorry," he heard muffled through Friday's speakers. "I'm so sorry, Pete."

Tony then curled up onto the couch on his side, face pressed to the hoodie, back toward the room. The projection cut off.

Peter didn't realize that he was crying until Friday asked, "Mother, are you okay?"

"I - " he tried to say, throat clogged with tears. "No," he admitted, jacket-covered wrist swiping away at his tears. He sniffled and sat where Tony had, finding his hoodie wedged between the cushions and the back of the couch. He pulled it out and, like Tony, smashed it to his face, breathing in the faintly lingering spicy scent of Tony Stark.

"I'm sorry, Mother," Friday said, speakers low, tone regretful. "I did not mean to cause you pain."

"You didn't, sweetheart," he shook his head, voice still clogged with tears. "I'm just sad."

"Why?" she asked, her natural curiosity shining through. Much like a child, she did not always know when it wasn't the right time to ask questions. But Peter had always liked indulging her and feeding her curiosity. The first few lab sessions they played 20 Questions back and forth until Tony would tell them both to shut up, though the amusement when he said it always shone through.

"I'm sad because Tony's dea - " he cleared his throat. "Because Tony - "

"It is okay, Mother," Friday cut him off. "I understand."

At that, he let himself fall back into the couch like Tony had. Above him, Friday dimmed the lights and stayed quiet, letting him cry out his grief in silence.

#starker #ironspider #peter parker x tony stark #tony stark x peter parker #iron man #peter parker #tony stark #peter x tony #spiderman #peter parker/tony stark #for you fic

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