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Bruce is (secretly) married [Bruce/Danny; Spirit Halloween]
I got sucked into the DPxDC crossover rabbit hole. I have read too many fanfics despite not knowing the source material.
I randomly got the idea of Bruce being secretly married and the Batfam finding out about it after Duke poses the question of why Bruce wears a ring. (Also how Danny's influence would have subtly changed things.)
Read this on ao3.
Next.
Bruce had always worn the ring, long before Dick came around â at least thatâs what the boy had told Jason when he asked about it.Â
They had looked through the records one night â bonding over finding out when he started, but he had already worn the ring once the man returned from his seven year long journey of training. The media had speculated it to be a family heirloom â either his fatherâs or motherâs wedding ring. Bruce neither confirmed or denied when they asked about it. Â
The man never took it off, not even when he stalked the night as Batman and neither of them had been brave enough to ask about it, after they watched clips where the media asked and his Brucie mask slipped into something uncomfortably blank.Â
Jason had quickly forgotten about it after Bruce had benched him from being Robin after Felipe Garzonasaâs death. He had been furious, questioning if Bruce didnât believe him that he didnât push the man.
âOf course I believe you, chum,â the man had said, but Jason didnât trust the manâs words. âBut you just saw a man die. Thatâs not something we should brush over.â
He had sent Jason to bed for the night, but the boy had sneaked out, believing Bruce to go back to patrol after dropping him off. He instead found him in his office, talking to someone on the phone.
â...You have better experience with stuff like this than meâŚâ the man said. âDo you think I should have never given Jason Robin? I know Dick agreed, butâŚâ Bruce trailed off and then paused to hear the other personâs response. âI know.â He let out a deep sigh. âIâll talk to him tomorrow about it. Are you still planning on visiting for the anniversary? I would appreciate if you tried talking to-â
Jason didnât wait to listen for more. He knew it. Bruce was going to take Robin away from him.Â
He remembered the picture he had found of his birth mother. He initially had wanted to tell Bruce to get his help to find her, but now he isnât sure if itâs such a good idea. If the man was gonna take Robin away from him anyway, he didnât want to be there for the moment.Â
With that goal in mind, unbeknownst to Bruce, he disappeared that night, setting out to the Middle East to find his mother.Â
Bruce finds his corpse several weeks later. Dick breaks down in space when he receives the call from Bruce. They attend the funeral together, neither of them talking about it, even years later.
Jason returns several years later, dead set on revenge on Joker and on Bruce for never avenging him. What he doesnât expect is to stumble over a newspaper celebrating the anniversary of the Jason Scholarship Foundation along with pictures of his funeral, showcasing both Bruce and Dick crying.Â
He never stumbles upon a memorial with his battered Robin suit and the description âJason Todd, a Good Soldierâ and beats Tim Drake, the third Robin half dead for replacing him. Instead he returns to the Manor, overwhelmed at Bruceâs breakdown and reaction. Red Hood debuts several months later â with the Bat symbol on his chest. They still have their conflicts, but Jason never has to fill a duffel bag full of heads for his debut.Â
Itâs only once Damian arrives, Cass becomes Bruceâs daughter and Duke his ward that the topic of the ring gets brought up again. Itâs Duke who asks what they all have been thinking.Â
âBy the way, why does Bruce wear a ring?â
Finding no information online and not managing to get anything out of Alfred, they break into Bruceâs office while heâs on patrol getting distracted by Damian and Cass. Itâs Tim who finds it, in a locked drawer, sealed carefully.
A marriage certificate.Â
âWho the hell is Daniel Fenton?â Jason questions gruffly.
âMy husband.â
Jason startles, turning to the doorway. Bruce is standing there, his arm crossed and he cringes at the displeased raise of Bruceâs right eyebrow. Behind him Cass shrugs at Timâs questioning gaze while Damian clicks his tongue.
âWhy havenât we met him? And, wait, does Dick know about this?â Tim asks.Â
Bruce lets out a deep sigh as he fiddles with the ring - the wedding ring.Â
âLetâs go somewhere else for this.â
They all shuffle to one of their smaller living rooms. Duke sets up a voice call so Dick, who is back in BlĂźdhaven, doesn't have to miss out. Tim is on his own computer, no doubt researching everything he can find on Daniel Fenton. Or would he be Daniel Wayne?Â
Itâs Damian who breaks the silence.
âFather. Explain.â
The man presses his lips together as he stares down into his tea. Alfred squeezes his shoulder behind him.Â
âThe reason you havenât met Danny is because heâs dead.â Bruce pauses while his kids pale. âTechnically.â
Before either of them can question that, suddenly a young white haired boy appears, sitting on Bruce armâs chair, eyebrow raised and wearing a black and white hazmat suit.
âShouldnât I be here for this?â
In an instant all of them sans Bruce and Alfred are on alert, Tim has a Batarang in hand, Jason one of his guns and Damian a knife poised to the unknown boyâs neck.
Itâs Bruce who diffuses the situation.
âDanny?â Bruce sounds disbelieving and Damian twitches, knife still in hand.Â
âIn the flesh.â The boy does jazz hands, neck grazing the knife, but it doesnât draw any blood. âOr ectoplasm. Whatever.â
âHow wonderful of you to surprise us with your presence Master Danny,â Alfred says, tone slightly sarcastic and Damian finally steps back, eyebrows knitted together.Â
Danny winces.Â
âI would have warned you, but Clockwork just dropped me off, telling me that itâs finally time.â
âThis is your husband?â Duke bursts out.Â
The boy bows playfully.
âDanny Fenton-Wayne. King of the Infinite Realms. Half ghost and-â Suddenly he transforms, white rings traveling over his body and leaving behind a middle-aged black haired man. â-Half human.â
âGHOST?â
âHALF HUMAN?â
âKING OF THE INFINITE REALMS?â
âThank fuck I thought Bruce was a pedophile for a moment.â
Everyone turns to stare at Duke.
âWhat? I just said what everyone thought,â the boy defends himself.
âActually that would be ephebophilia,â Danny corrects. âAlthough he would still classify as a necrophile.âÂ
Bruce punches the manâs forearm, rolling his eyes with a fond look and Danny yelps, rubbing the spot.
âHey! If anyone is allowed to joke about it, itâs me!â the man complains with a pout and Bruce shakes his head.Â
âAnother reason why you never met Danny is because â believe it or not â heâs the King of the Infinite Realms, which means he is quite busy.â
âSo much paperwork,â Danny groans. âIf I get Constantineâs ass, I swear to the Ancients that heâs gonna die. Half a decade lost because I had to bargain for his soul pieces!â
âAfter I returned to Gotham to become Batman, the Infinite Realms unfortunately fell into war following a coup attempt, leaving Danny to deal with the mess.â
âAnd Clockwork prohibited me from visiting the Gotham until a certain point, claiming that I would change the timeline too much with my influence,â Danny finishes for Bruce, all of Bruceâs kids watching with fascination how seamlessly they seem to fit together as the man leans his head against Bruceâs shoulder while Bruce runs a hand through the manâs black hair. âConsidering I would have never let Bruce run around with child vigilantes, heâs probably right.â
âI forgot you know about that,â Bruce sighs.
âJazz kept me updated,â Danny says smugly.
âThatâs a break of patient confidentiality,â Bruce grumbles.Â
âShe may be your therapist, but sheâs also my sister.â
âMr. I-Rather-Chew-Nails-than-Talk-About-My-Feelings?â Jason exclaims. âNo way!â
âI have been vocal about the fact that I go to therapy.â Bruce frowns.
âI thought you were joking!â
âWhere do you guys think I go every Sunday evening?â Bruce pinches the bridge of his nose.
âJustice League meeting?âÂ
âGolfing?â
Once again everyone stares at Duke and he flushes at the attention.
âI thought itâs a rich person thing!âÂ
Danny snorts.
âHe got you there, darling.â
âWhen and how did you guys meet?â Itâs the first time Dick actually speaks up, having observed everything â or as much as he could â through the web camera.Â
âAt a gala when both Bruce and I were teens,â Danny answers. âMy godfather dragged me into it. At least one thing I can thank him for.â
Danny smiles while Bruce grunts in agreement.Â
âThe wedding?â Tim follows up.
Both Danny and Bruche pause to think.
âDid we do the civil registration in Paris or Las Vegas?â Danny turns to Bruce. âI canât remember.â
âWe were quite drunk,â Bruce agrees.
Danny snips his fingers like he remembers something, but then he shakes his head. He puts a hand to his chin, tiling his head.Â
âOr was it Brazil?â
The rest blink at the pair before Danny shrugs with an apologetic smile.
âWe had the real wedding in the Infinite Realms though,â Danny explains, âOnce Bruce got finished with his training. The citizens wouldnât have accepted it otherwise. Alfred would have taken pictures, but technology doesnât work in the Infinite Realms.â
âSuch a shame, it was quite a nice wedding,â Alfred affirms.Â
âAlfred knew?!â is the consensus complaint.Â
âDoes Mother and Grandfather know about this?â Damian asks stiffly.
âConsidering Raâs used Bruceâs and your motherâs DNA to artificially create a baby despite knowing â he doesnât care,â Danny says just a tad-bit too cheerfully.Â
The revelation leaves everyone reeling.Â
âOkay, now that all questions are answered-â Danny doesnât give them time to inject. âCan we talk about the stinking elephant in the room?â
Bruce raises an eyebrow as Danny gestures to Jason. Jason almost would feel insulted if Danny didnât sound so genuinely surprised that nobody else said or noticed something.Â
âWhat the hell is that supposed to mean?!â Jason complains as he discreetly tries to sniff his armpits. Considering Timâs and Dickâs snickering, he doesnât succeed.Â
âYour Ectoplasm reeks like-â Danny grimaces as he flails his arms. âLike you took a bath in spoiled eggs.â
Danny turns to Bruce with an angry look in his eyes.
âEspecially you should have noticed, considering you are liminal! His core is completely malnourished.â Bruce winces. âDid you forget that I gave you a way to contact Frostbite?â
âWithout the ambient ectoplasm you radiate my ability to see ectoplasmic entities and speak and read Ghost Speak slowly degraded over the years,â Bruce explains. âI wasnât aware Jason had been a type of ectoplasmic entity.âÂ
âHis eyes literally glow green when heâs angry!â Danny chides. âHe returned from the dead for revenge. Heâs clearly a Revenant. Thatâs Ghost 101!â
Itâs amusing to see Bruce get scolded by someone else other than Alfred. Alone for that fact Jason has to admit that he begrudgingly likes Danny.Â
âAlright-â Danny stands up and tugs on Jasonâs arm. Bruce moves to follow him like second nature. âYou are coming with me right this instant.â
Before anyone can stop them, Danny transforms back into his Ghost Form, Jasonâs hand in one and Bruce in the other and steps through a glowing green portal, it vanishing shortly after. Silence follows.
âSo well that just happened.â
This time everyone agrees with Duke.Â
#dc crossover#dc#dc x dp crossover#dc x dp#dpxdc#danny phantom#ghost king danny#danny fenton#batman#danny x bruce#spirit halloween#batfam#batfamily#alfred pennyworth#how do people tag on tumblr? lol#yoonjae20 writing#yoonjae20#bruce wayne#brucy wayne/danny fenton#bruce/danny#spirit halloween ship#others feel free to add more!#pjo x dc prompt#technically?#i would be honored if anyone wants to write something based on this!
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Autism and Fecal Smearing
I want to get this out of the way first so I'm just gonna say it, I struggle with this awful habit which is called diaper digging and fecal smearing, this post (and blog for that matter) I don't want to shy away from talking about this stuff. So yeah if I have a bowel accident, am frustrated/overstimulated/angry/sad, and am left alone for a few minutes I tend to do this. It's not as bad as before because I have preventative measures in place, like special onesies that make it so I can't remove my diaper myself (ughhh whatever...) and crunchy scented textured slime that my mom will add even more scent to just to make it overwhelming. The average number of episodes has been greatly reduced but I had one a couple weeks ago when my onesies were in the watch so the topic is fresh on my mind.
A lot of caregivers and autism parents are mystified and baffled by this habit and wonder why we do it. I can't speak for everyone, only myself, but to me personally the scent and texture of feces is so overwhelming and strong that I get a "high" from it. I take cannabis edibles daily and my parents let me get drunk once a month so I'll say its very comparable. I get a rush from it. My life can be so monotonous sometimes that smearing crap feels like getting away with a bank robbery, I go from extremely angry to feeling before then to like a happy giddy kid without a care in the world. I zone out so hard that I end up smearing it all over my face, walls, floor, and if it gets in my mouth I'm usually too far gone to care. I do not do it because I'm mad at my parents, I do not do it because I want to get back at them for something, I simply do it because my need for sensory input is so strong and when I'm about to go into a potentially violent meltdown I reach for the sensory nuke when my normal things to stim with just won't cut it. No high is complete without the crash and there's a crash. Seeing my parents and one of my unlucky friends SOOOOOOO unreasonably mad, it's terrifying. My parents got used to it and eventually just shrugged it off but I have heard them lose their cool over it several times and have heard my name and every cuss word in the book the room over where they clean. Not nice of them but I do not blame them one bit but the feeling inside hearing that is very real for me. I guess they got too good at shrugging it off. I had an incident where I smeared in the bathroom of one of my high school friends, very chill guy, look at me and scream at the top of my lungs, and punched a hole in the wall in the living room. I didn't know the painting he had in his bathroom was that rare but I ruined it completely and that's why he reacted that way. He could of done better but I do not blame him one bit. After that though seeing a side of that friend that I never seen before scared me into wearing the stupid onesie suit every day without fuss or a fight when before I would. Not only the suit but I have the replacement slime on me at all times, if I have a BM I tend to just pull it out and play with it. This doubles up as subtly letting my parents know I need a change, which I like cause I don't have to ask verbally which can feel kinda degrading sometimes. There is one good thing that has happened with this though. My hippie parents looked at my turd stained walls and thought I had some latent artistic talent and needed self expression and bought me art and painting supplies. They were misguided, it didn't prevent any incidents but I still took the art well. My therapist at the time had some art connections and the art I made was featured in what's known as an "outsider art" gallery. I sold a few pieces for 300-600 each. It's just a little bit bitter sweet cause if you've seen the King of the Hill episode about the Probots or just know a bit about outsider art in general, you'd know the way they market it is kind of, problematic to say the least. The gallery's artist profile for me made me out to be some kind of idiot dunce and made my parents look like heroic geniuses for spotting this talent or some shit and it's embarrassing that my artwork sold most likely cause of that over the strength of the art. Like oh wow look at this stupid R word who plays with poop his cool parents are soo smart, ughhhh. However I guess that's just the art game and I'm super proud of myself I made a couple thousand dollars of MY OWN money, it meant the world to me to have it. I'm not allowed to post my artwork on here and I wish I could share it with you on MY terms and not the gallery's but my parents are worried it could come back to my identity.
I want to end this post by saying if you engage in fecal smearing you are not stupid, broken, or filthy. You are a human being desperate for relief and you took the fastest way to get it. Shout out to all my autistic homies who smear or have smeared, I see you and you are loved.
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The CEO Collision - Part One
Pairing: CEO!Seonghwa x CEO! reader (f)
Warnings / content for Part One: Suggestive content, angsty, alcohol consumption. Please note that other than Ateez, all other character names used are fictional.
Word Count: 10.4k
Masterlist for The CEO Collision
âCongratulations, Ms. Y/N,â your secretary said when you entered your office after your last meeting for the day, and the week as it was a Friday. âThe investors seemed impressed.â
âThank you, Nari,â you replied with a grin, gathering your stuff to put it in your bag. âShouldnât you be heading out soon for your date?â
Nari blushed. âYunho pushed our reservation by half an hour to give me some time to get ready.â
You nodded. âThatâs sweet of him. Have fun tonight,â you said, slinging your bag over your shoulder. âAnd tell Yunho I said hi.â
âWill do,â Nari said with a grin. âYouâre heading straight home?â
âThatâs the plan,â you replied, glancing at your phone to check the time. âIâm long overdue for a quiet night in.â
Nari chuckled. âKnowing you, youâll end up working from home anyway.â
You smirked. âProbably, but at least Iâll be in my pajamas.â
âFair point,â she said, walking you to the elevator. âDrive safe, Ms. Y/N.â
âYou too. And donât let Yunho distract you too much from dinner,â you teased as the elevator doors opened.
Nari blushed again, laughing as she waved goodbye. âNo promises.â
The elevator doors closed, leaving you alone for the descent to the parking garage. You leaned against the wall, letting out a breath you hadnât realized you were holding. The week had been productive but exhausting, and the promise of the weekend was the only thing that kept you going.
Once the elevator reached the basement, you stepped out and made your way to your car. The quiet hum of the nearly empty garage was oddly comforting as you unlocked the sleek black sedan that your father had insisted you drive.
Sliding into the driverâs seat, you tossed your bag onto the passenger side and started the engine. The low purr was satisfying, a reminder of all the hard work that had brought you here. As you pulled out of the parking lot, the city lights began to blur together in a comforting glow against the evening sky.
The drive home was uneventful, the streets gradually growing quieter as you moved away from the bustling business district. By the time you reached the gates of your familyâs estate, the sun had dipped below the horizon, painting the sky in soft shades of pink and purple.
The gates opened automatically as you approached, and you drove down the winding driveway toward the sprawling mansion. Parking in your usual spot, you turned off the car and sat there for a moment, staring at the grand facade of your childhood home.
With a resigned sigh, you grabbed your bag and stepped out of the car, making your way to the front door. One of the house staff greeted you with a polite smile as you entered.
âWelcome home, Ms. Y/N. Dinner will be served shortly.â
You nodded in acknowledgment, slipping off your heels as you made your way inside. The comforting aroma of your motherâs cooking wafted through the air, and despite your exhaustion, a small part of you looked forward to the meal.
As you approached the dining room, you heard the faint hum of conversation and your twin brotherâs unmistakable laughter.
âLook who finally decided to show up,â your twin, Hongjoong, teased without looking up.
Rolling your eyes, you walked over and ruffled his perfectly styled hair, earning a sharp protest.
âUgh, stop that!â he grumbled, swatting your hand away.
âCanât help it,â you replied with a smirk as you took your seat. âYou look too polished. Someone has to keep you grounded.â
He huffed, running his fingers through his hair to fix it, muttering under his breath about how annoying you were.
âKids, behave,â your mother said with a fond smile as the staff began serving dinner.
You glanced at the spreadâsteaming platters of food, perfectly arranged salads, and freshly baked buns. Despite the lavish meal, your mind was still buzzing with thoughts of work.
âHow was your day, dear?â your mother asked, her tone warm while she watched you fill up your plate.
âIt went really well,â you replied, a sense of pride creeping into your voice. âWe had our investor meeting today for the new line of medical imaging devices, and they were impressed. Theyâve agreed to back us for the next phase of development.â
âThatâs wonderful news,â your father said, setting down his fork to look at you. âThis could be a game-changer for your company.â
âIt will be,â you said confidently, picking up your glass of water. âThe potential applications are huge, and with their support, weâll be able to expand production globally.â
Hongjoong raised an eyebrow. âAnd here I thought youâd be burnt out by now. Youâve been working on that pitch for weeks.â
You shrugged, taking a sip of water. âI wonât lie, itâs been exhausting. But seeing the results today made it worth it.â
âHard work always pays off,â your father said approvingly. âYouâve done an excellent job, Y/N.â
Your mother beamed with pride. âI knew youâd pull it off. Youâve always had a knack for making things happen.â
âWell, letâs just hope the development phase goes as smoothly,â you said, though the smile on your face didnât waver.
Dinner buzzed with lively conversation as the dishes were passed around. Stories from work, jokes, and plans for the weekend filled the air. You felt the weekâs exhaustion slowly ebb away as the comfortable rhythm of family time took over.
âSo, Joong,â your father said casually, turning to your brother. âAre you heading to Mingiâs bar later tonight? Seonghwa mentioned the two of you were planning to catch up over drinks.â
Hongjoong shrugged, chewing on a bite of salmon. âHe brought it up earlier, but I havenât decided yet. Why?â
Your father leaned back in his chair, his expression growing more serious. âI spoke with Seonghwaâs parents today.â
The mood at the table shifted subtly, your mother straightening her posture and Hongjoong setting down his fork.
âOh?â your brother said cautiously. âWhat about?â
Your father hesitated for a moment, as though choosing his words carefully. Then, he said, âTheir company has been struggling for a while now. They came to us with a⌠suggestion.â
âWhat kind of suggestion?â you asked, sensing where this might be headed but hoping you were wrong.
Your father looked directly at you. âTheyâve asked for your hand in marriage, Y/N.â
The words hung in the air like a thunderclap.
âWhat?â you said, your voice sharper than you intended.
Hongjoong gaped, clearly just as blindsided at hearing that his bestfriend would possibly marry his twin sister. âWait, hold on. Youâre joking, right?â
Your father shook his head. âThey believe a marriage between you and Seonghwa would secure both familiesâ futures. It would strengthen the partnership and stabilize their company.â
âThis is ridiculous,â you snapped, your appetite vanishing. âYou canât be serious.â
âItâs not as bad as you think,â your mother interjected softly. âYou and Seonghwa already know each other since high school. It wouldnât be like starting from scratch.â
âThatâs exactly the problem!â you exclaimed. âWe know each other too well, and itâs not good!â
Well, your relationship with Seonghwa was complicated. In simpler words, you hated each other.
Okay, maybe hate is a strong word. Strongly dislike?
You and Seonghwa have history, though. Â
And it hurts every time you see him.
âY/N,â your father said firmly, âthis is bigger than personal feelings. Sometimes, sacrifices need to be made for the greater good.â
Hongjoong was not amused, his voice rising. âYouâre really going to force her into this? Without even discussing it with her first?â
âWeâre discussing it now,â your father replied, his tone calm but unyielding.
You felt a wave of anger and disbelief crash over you. âDiscussing? Youâve already decided, havenât you?â
Your mother avoided your gaze, and your fatherâs silence was confirmation enough.
Hongjoongâs jaw clenched. âThis is insane.â
âYouâre being dramatic,â your father said. âThis arrangement will benefit everyone.â
âIâm not doing it,â you said through gritted teeth, pushing your chair back. âYou canât make me.â
âY/Nââ your mother started, but you were already on your feet, your heart pounding with fury.
âI need some air,â you muttered before storming out of the dining room, leaving your stunned family behind.
The cool night air brushed against your skin as you stepped into the garden, the faint glow of lanterns lighting the cobblestone path. The neatly trimmed hedges and rows of blooming flowers framed the vast space, but your focus was on the gazebo aheadâa sanctuary of peace amid the chaos of the evening.
You made your way to it and sat down on the wooden bench inside. The gazebo overlooked the koi pond, its surface rippling gently under the moonlight. You closed your eyes, inhaling deeply, trying to calm the storm of emotions raging within you.
Marriage. To him.
The thought alone made your chest tighten. You pressed your hands against your lap, fingers gripping the fabric of your dress. Your mind, against your will, drifted to the past.
It was senior year of college, a warm night like this one, and a party full of red cups, blaring music, and friends urging you to drink. You and Seonghwa had both been there, circling each other with that same mix of irritation and curiosity that had always defined your relationship.
You remembered the alcohol-fueled courage that led to a heated argument in the kitchen, which somehow turned into shared laughter and then lips moving against each other, and thenâŚ
You shook your head, willing the memory to stop, but it continued. The two of you in his dimly lit bedroom, a tangle of limbs and whispers, hands all over each other, bare skin to bare skin, the lines of hatred blurring for a brief moment. And then, the next morning.
The hurt welled up as you recalled how he had acted like nothing had happened, brushing it off as though it had been meaningless. No acknowledgment, no apologyâjust an unspoken agreement to pretend it never occurred.
Your nails dug into your palms as the emotions swirled. Hurt. Anger. Resentment.
Because that wasnât the first time you spent the night in Seonghwaâs bed. It happened one more time the same year.
And again three years later when you both started a masters degree in the same university.
He reacted the exact same way, acting like this was all a mistake.
A soft knock on the wooden pillar of the gazebo startled you, pulling you back to the present.
You turned, and there he wasâPark Seonghwa.
His tall figure was illuminated by the soft garden lights, and his dark suit clung to him perfectly, as always. His expression was unreadable, his eyes steady as they met yours.
âMind if I join you?â he asked, his voice calm, though you could sense the tension beneath it.
Your heart skipped a beat, but you masked it with a glare. âDo I have a choice?â
Seonghwaâs lips curved into the faintest smirk as he stepped into the gazebo, his presence filling the small space. âNot really.â
You scoffed, crossing your arms. âWhy are you here?â
âI came to pick up your brother,â he said, leaning against one of the pillars. âBut it seems like I stumbled into a family meeting instead.â
âYou knew,â you accused, your voice sharp.
His brows furrowed. âKnew what?â
âAbout this ridiculous arrangement,â you snapped, standing abruptly. âAbout our parents trying to marry us off like some business merger.â
Seonghwaâs expression hardened. âYou think I had a say in this?â
âYou always seem to have a say in everything,â you shot back, the years of resentment bubbling to the surface.
He exhaled sharply, running a hand through his hair. âI found out this afternoon, Y/N. Iâm just as blindsided as you are.â
You searched his face for any sign of deception, but all you saw was the same frustration you felt. It caught you off guard, and you lowered your gaze, the fight draining out of you.
âIâm not doing it,â you muttered, more to yourself than to him.
Seonghwaâs voice softened slightly. âNeither am I. But you know how our families are. They wonât make this easy for us.â
You clenched your jaw, looking away. The weight of the situation pressed down on you, and for a moment, the two of you stood in silence, the gardenâs serenity at odds with the turmoil in your hearts.
âI donât want to marry you, Seonghwa,â you said finally, your voice trembling with honesty.
He hesitated, and when he spoke, his tone was quieter, almost resigned. âI know,â he murmured, loud enough for you to hear before he left you alone.
But for some reason, the way he said it didnât bring you the relief you thought it would.
-x-x-x-
The soft clinking of cutlery and the murmur of polite conversation filled the sunlit dining room. The brunch spread before you was nothing short of extravagant, as was typical of any gathering hosted by your family. Freshly baked croissants, platters of fruit, and a variety of cheeses adorned the table, along with a selection of teas and juices.
Across from you sat Mr. and Mrs. Park, Seonghwaâs parents, their expressions warm despite the tension that lingered beneath the surface. Mrs. Park, ever elegant, wore a tailored pastel suit, her smile gentle as she sipped her tea. Mr. Park, though visibly tired, maintained his usual composed demeanor.
âThank you for having us,â Mrs. Park said, glancing at you. âItâs always a pleasure to visit.â
âItâs always nice to see you, Mrs. Park,â you replied with a small smile, setting your cup down.
Your parents sat at the head of the table, exchanging pleasantries with the Parks, but the unspoken purpose of the brunch hung heavy in the air.
âHowâs Seonghwa?â your mother asked casually, though there was a slight edge to her tone.
Mrs. Park hesitated, her smile faltering for a moment. âHe⌠had a late night with Hongjoong and Mingi,â she said delicately. âHeâs resting.â
You barely suppressed a scoff. Of course, he was. It wasnât hard to imagine him nursing a hangover while his parents tried to salvage their familyâs business.
âOh yes,â your mother said, her expression neutral as she took a sip of her tea.
Mrs. Park quickly redirected the conversation. âY/N, how is your work going? I heard about your recent success with the investors. Thatâs truly impressive.â
âThank you,â you said, offering a polite smile. âItâs been a busy few weeks, but the results were worth it.â
âYouâve always been so driven,â Mrs. Park said fondly. âItâs one of the things Iâve always admired about you.â
You blinked, caught off guard by the sincerity in her voice. Mrs. Park had always been kind to you, treating you almost like a second daughter. The thought of her struggling because of their companyâs financial issues tugged at something in your chest.
As the conversation continued, Mr. Park cleared his throat, drawing everyoneâs attention. âWe wonât pretend this isnât a difficult situation,â he said, his tone steady but tinged with exhaustion. âOur company⌠itâs been challenging, to say the least. Weâve explored every option we can think of this past two years, but this marriage proposal seemed like the best path forwardâfor both our families.â
Your father nodded, his expression serious. âItâs not ideal, but itâs a way to ensure stability.â
Mrs. Park turned to you, her gaze soft. âY/N, I know this isnât fair to you. If there were another way, we wouldnât even consider asking this of you. But⌠weâre out of options.â
The vulnerability in her voice made your heart ache. You had known the Parks for years, and they had always treated you with warmth and respect. The thought of them losing everything felt deeply unfair.
âI understand,â you said quietly, your hands resting on your lap. âYou and Mr. Park have always been kind to me, and I appreciate that more than I can say. If marrying Seonghwa is what it takes to help your family, then⌠Iâll consider it.â A silence fell over the table, broken only by the soft chirping of birds outside. âButâŚâ you continued, âI would like to get to know Seonghwa a bit more first.â
Mrs. Parkâs eyes filled with gratitude, and she reached out to place a hand over yours. âThank you, Y/N. You have no idea what this means to us.â
Your father looked at you with a mix of surprise and approval, while your motherâs expression remained unreadable.
But as you sat there, a quiet determination settling over you, you couldnât help but wonder how you would face Seonghwa after thisâand whether he would ever understand why you made this choice.
You had a soft spot when it came to him. Perhaps thatâs why it was so easy for you to at least agree to try?
Later in the day, you were sat on the plush couch in your room, a glass of wine in your hand as you recounted the whirlwind of the past 24 hours to your best friend. Across from you, Yeri was curled up in an armchair, her eyes wide with interest as you spoke.
When you finished, she let out a low whistle, her jaw dropping slightly. âSo, let me get this straight,â she said, leaning forward. âYouâre basically engaged to CEO Park Seonghwa?â
âUh, no,â you replied with a sigh, twirling the stem of your wine glass between your fingers. âI asked to get to know him, Yeri. Itâs⌠complicated.â
Yeri tilted her head thoughtfully, her expression surprisingly calm. âIt doesnât sound like youâre entirely against it, though. The idea of marrying him, I mean.â
You blinked at her, caught off guard. âYouâre not going to yell at me about how unfair this is?â
She shrugged, offering you a small smile. âDonât get me wrong, I think the whole âarranged marriage for the sake of businessâ thing is ridiculous. But honestly, Y/N, it might not be the worst thing in the world.â
Your brows furrowed. âHow can you say that? You know how I feel about him.â
Yeri sighed, setting her glass down on the coffee table. âI know Seonghwaâs a sore spot for you, and I know your history with him isnât exactly⌠ideal. But itâs been nearly four years since the last time you were with him, you both are thirty years old, and his parents are struggling and this can help them. If your families think this is the best way to secure the future, it might be worth considering.â
You stared at her, unsure whether to feel betrayed or grateful. âYouâre awfully calm about all this.â
âBecause I know you,â she said, leaning back in her chair. âYou wouldnât even be entertaining this idea if you didnât care. Youâve always had a soft spot for people in need, poor or rich, and as much as you hate to admit it, you care about his family. PlusâŚâ She paused, a teasing smile creeping onto her lips. âItâs not like Seonghwaâs hard to look at.â
âYeri!â you exclaimed, throwing a pillow at her.
She laughed, dodging the pillow easily. âIâm just saying! If you have to be stuck in a marriage of convenience, at least itâs with someone who looks like him. You must admit, he speaks so eloquently too.â
You rolled your eyes, but a small smile tugged at your lips despite yourself. âYouâre unbelievable.â
âAnd youâre too stubborn for your own good,â she shot back. âLook, Iâm not saying this is going to be easy. But maybe itâs an opportunity to start fresh. Youâve spent so much energy hating himâmaybe itâs time to let some of that go?â
You bit your lip, her words hitting closer to home than you wanted to admit. âItâs not that simple, Yeri.â
âI know itâs not,â she said gently. âBut youâre one of the strongest people I know, and if anyone can make this work, itâs you.â
You let out a long sigh, setting your glass down. âI donât even know where to start.â
Yeri leaned forward, her eyes sparkling with determination. âYou start by surviving this engagement thing or getting to know him whatever-thing. And when the time comes, Iâll be there to make sure your wedding is the event of the century. Deal?â
A small laugh escaped you as you reached for your wine glass again. âDeal.â
âTo new beginnings,â Yeri said, raising her glass in a toast.
âTo surviving this mess,â you replied, clinking your glass against hers.
-x-x-x-
The hum of activity filled your office as you reviewed the latest reports from your team. The success of the investor meeting last week had set a positive tone, and you were determined to keep the momentum going.
Your phone buzzed against your desk, drawing your attention away from the document in front of you. Frowning slightly, you reached for it and saw a message from Seonghwa.
Seonghwa: Dinner tonight? Letâs talk.
Your breath hitched, your heart racing despite yourself. You hesitated, staring at the screen for a moment before typing a reply.
You: What time?
The response came almost immediately.
Seonghwa: 7 PM? Iâll pick you up.
You: Sounds good
You set your phone down, trying to focus on your work, but your thoughts were already elsewhere. The idea of sitting across from him at a dinner table was⌠unsettling. After years of tension, could the two of you even hold a decent conversation?
A knock on your office door pulled you from your thoughts. âCome in,â you called, smoothing your expression.
Nari walked in, holding a folder. âHere are the updated projections you asked for.â
âThank you,â you said, taking the folder and setting it on your desk.
Nari hesitated for a moment, glancing at your phone. âAre you okay, Ms. Y/N? You seem⌠distracted.â
You managed a smile. âIâm fine, just a lot on my mind.â
She nodded, not pressing further. âIf you need anything, let me know.â
As she left, you leaned back in your chair, letting out a long sigh. You knew why Seonghwa had reached out. You were both navigating uncharted territory, and like it or not, you needed to give this a chanceâfor your families, if nothing else.
When the clock struck five, you grabbed your coat and bag, leaving the office with a sense of apprehension. As you headed to your car, you checked your phone again, confirming the time.
7 PM. Dinner with CEO Park Seonghwa.
Your grip on the steering wheel tightened as you drove home to get ready. You werenât sure if this dinner would bring any clarity, but one thing was certain: it was the start of a new chapter, whether you liked it or not.
---
You stood in front of your floor-length mirror, smoothing the fabric of your black silk dress. It clung to your figure perfectly, the sleek design exuding elegance while still being understated enough for a dinner meeting. Your matching pumps completed the look, and you reached for your favorite necklaceâa delicate silver chain with a tiny diamond pendantâfastening it around your neck.
As you finished applying a touch of lipstick, there was a knock at your bedroom door.
âCome in,â you called, setting the tube down on your vanity.
The door creaked open, and Hongjoongâs familiar face appeared. He leaned casually against the doorframe, his sharp suit slightly wrinkled, likely from a long day at work.
âYou look nice,â he said, his tone light but his eyes watchful.
âThanks,â you replied, turning back to the mirror to check your hair one last time.
âSoâŚâ he began, stepping further into the room. âDinner with Seonghwa, huh? Heâs waiting downstairs.â
You let out a soft sigh, turning to face him. âDonât start.â
âIâm not starting,â he said, raising his hands in mock surrender. âI just⌠wanted to check in.â
You arched a brow. âCheck in? Since when do you âcheck inâ?â
He smiled faintly, but there was a seriousness in his eyes that made your chest tighten. âSince my twin sister got roped into an engagement with my best friend, whom sheâs barely been able to tolerate for the past decade.â
You crossed your arms, leaning against the edge of your vanity. âIâll survive, Joong. Itâs just dinner.â
âI know,â he said, sitting on the edge of your bed. âBut youâve never told me why you and Seonghwa donât get along. And now youâre supposed to marry him. I canât help but worry about how this is going to work.â
You averted your gaze, focusing on the soft shimmer of your dress under the light. âItâs⌠complicated.â You couldnât tell Hongjoong about the couple of times you slept with Seonghwa; he would be furious and you didnât want any drama.
âIt always is with you two,â he said, exhaling a laugh. âBut you know you can talk to me, right? If thereâs something I should know, Iâm here.â
The sincerity in his voice made your throat tighten, but you forced a small smile. âI know. Thanks, Joong.â
He studied you for a moment, his brows furrowing slightly. âYou donât have to do this, you know. If itâs too muchâif itâs not what you wantâmom and dad will understand.â
You shook your head, standing straighter. âItâs not about what I want. This is bigger than me, and you know it.â
Hongjoong sighed, running a hand through his hair. âI hate that youâre in this position. But if anyone can handle it, itâs you.â
You smiled faintly. âThanks for the pep talk, coach.â
He grinned, standing and brushing invisible lint from his suit. âWhat are brothers for?â
As he reached the door, he paused, glancing back at you. âBe careful tonight, okay?â
âI will,â you promised, and with that, he left, leaving you alone with your thoughts once again.
You turned back to the mirror, taking a deep breath. Your reflection stared back at you, poised but uncertain. This dinner wasnât just a mealâit was the first step in navigating a path you never thought youâd take.
You descended the grand staircase of your familyâs mansion, the soft clicking of your heels echoing against the marble floor. Your fingers brushed lightly against the ornate railing, and you forced yourself to remain calm, despite the flutter of nerves in your chest.
At the base of the stairs, Seonghwa stood with your mother, engaged in polite conversation. His smooth voice carried up to you, though you couldnât make out his words.
It wasnât until you were halfway down that his gaze shifted, locking onto you. His conversation with your mother faltered for a brief second, his eyes trailing up your figure with a flicker of something you couldnât quite place.
You tried not to let his attention rattle you, but you couldnât help noticing how sharp he looked tonight. He wore a silk white button-up shirt tucked neatly into tailored black slacks. The top button of his shirt was undone, revealing just enough of his collarbone to add an air of casual charm.
There was a reason why Park Seonghwa was frequently labeled the most handsome and eligible bachelor CEO in the country. And tonight, it was painfully obvious why.
As you reached the last step, your mother turned to you with a warm smile. âAh, there you are, darling. You look stunning.â
âThank you, Mom,â you said, offering her a small smile. Your gaze flicked briefly to Seonghwa, who was still watching you. His expression was unreadable, but the intensity of his stare made your skin heat.
âSeonghwaâs been keeping me company while you were getting ready,â your mother said, her tone light and conversational.
âGood to know heâs capable of that,â you replied, unable to resist a teasing jab.
Seonghwaâs lips quirked upward in a small smirk. âI aim to impress.â
You rolled your eyes but couldnât suppress the faint twitch of amusement at the corners of your mouth.
âWell,â your mother said, clasping her hands together, âyou two should get going. Donât keep your reservation waiting. Drive safe, Seonghwa.â
âOf course,â Seonghwa said smoothly, nodding toward the front door.
You paused mid-step, turning to him with a raised brow. âYouâre driving?â
âI always do,â he replied, already pulling the keys from his pocket. âWhy? Unless youâd rather drive yourself?â
You huffed softly, walking past him toward the front door. âJust try not to kill us.â
âIâll do my best,â he quipped, following you outside.
The chrome silver sports car parked in the driveway was unmistakably hisâsleek, polished, and oozing with understated wealth, much like its owner.
Seonghwa stepped ahead to open the passenger door for you, a gentlemanly gesture that caught you off guard. You slid into the seat without comment, the faint scent of leather and his cologne enveloping you.
Moments later, he was in the driverâs seat, starting the car with a low purr of the engine.
âThis should be interesting,â he murmured, glancing at you with a playful glint in his eyes before shifting the car into gear and pulling out of the driveway. The soft hum of the engine filled the car as Seonghwa drove, his hands relaxed on the steering wheel. You leaned against the window, watching as the glittering skyline of Seoul gradually faded into quieter roads and open spaces.
You frowned, glancing at him. âThis doesnât look like Gangnam or any of the other districts people like you usually frequent. Where are we going?â
He smirked, the faint glow of the dashboard highlighting his sharp profile. âRelax. Youâll like it.â
âWill I?â you shot back, your voice tinged with doubt. âCEOs like you go beyond Seoul?â
âYouâre a CEO too,â Seonghwa chuckled, a low, amused sound that made you glance at him again. âExpensive doesnât always mean good,â he said, his tone teasing. âSeems like the guys youâve been with before just took you to the basics.â
You blinked, taken aback by his comment. âExcuse me?â
He shrugged, a playful grin tugging at his lips. âWhat? Itâs not my fault if your standards have been... uninspired.â
âUninspired?â you repeated, your voice incredulous.
âYouâll see what I mean,â he replied smoothly, clearly enjoying your reaction.
You huffed, crossing your arms. âIâll have you know, Iâve been to some of the best places in Seoul.â
âGood for you,â he said, his grin widening. âBut tonight, Iâm showing you something better.â
You bit back a retort, deciding it wasnât worth the argument. Instead, you turned your attention back to the window as the car began winding up a steep hill.
Moments later, Seonghwa pulled into a small parking lot at the top. The restaurant in front of you was nothing like what youâd expected. It was simple yet elegant, with warm lanterns casting a golden glow on its wooden façade.
âThis is where weâre eating?â you asked, unable to hide your surprise.
âOne of my favorites,â he said, stepping out of the car. âCome on.â
You followed him inside, where the soft murmur of conversation and the faint aroma of freshly prepared dishes greeted you. The hostess bowed and led you down a quiet hallway to a private room at the end.
The room was intimate and tastefully decorated, with a low table surrounded by plush cushions. A large window stretched along one wall, offering a breathtaking view of Seoulâs twinkling lights below.
âNot bad, right?â Seonghwa said as he gestured for you to sit.
You hesitated for a moment before settling onto one of the cushions. âThe view is⌠nice,â you admitted grudgingly.
He smirked, taking the seat opposite you. âI told you I know good places. You just had to trust me.â
A server arrived to pour tea and hand you both menus. As you glanced over the options, you couldnât help stealing a glance at Seonghwa. He looked completely at ease, his sharp features softened by the warm glow of the room. For a brief moment, you wondered if there was more to him than the infuriating person youâd known for years.
As the server returned with the first round of dishes, you took a moment to admire the spread. The plates were elegantly arranged, and the aroma of fresh ingredients filled the room.
âThis looks amazing,â you admitted, glancing at Seonghwa.
He smirked, leaning back against the cushion. âTold you I know good spots.â
You picked up your chopsticks and sampled one of the dishes, your eyes widening slightly at the burst of flavor. âOkay, Iâll give you this. The food is actually good.â
He chuckled, watching you with a satisfied expression. âYou sound surprised.â
âWell, forgive me for underestimating someone who usually dines at places where the plates are more decorative than functional,â you quipped, a playful edge to your tone.
âTouchĂŠ,â he replied, reaching for his glass of tea. âBut Iâll have you know, Iâve always preferred places like this. The hype about fine dining is overrated.â
You raised an eyebrow. âReally? Youâre saying that after all the times youâve been photographed at Michelin-starred restaurants?â
He smirked. âAppearances. You know how it is.â
You rolled your eyes but couldnât argue. After all, youâd played the same game for the sake of business and image.
As the meal progressed, the conversation turned unexpectedly candid.
âSo,â you said, setting your chopsticks down for a moment, âwhy did you agree to this? The engagement, I mean.â
He met your gaze, his expression calm but serious. âDo I really have a choice? My companyâs struggling, and our families are⌠insistent.â
âYou couldâve said no,â you countered, tilting your head slightly.
âAnd let my parents deal with the fallout?â he said with a dry chuckle. âYou know how they are. Saying no wasnât really an option.â
You sighed, swirling the tea in your cup. âYeah, I get that. My parents were just as persistent.â
There was a moment of silence before he spoke again, his tone quieter. âWhat about you? Why didnât you refuse?â
You hesitated, the memory of his parentsâ heartfelt words at brunch flashing through your mind. âTheyâve always been kind to me,â you admitted. âI couldnât stand the thought of letting them down when theyâre already dealing with so much.â
He studied you for a moment, his expression unreadable. âYou really care about them, huh?â
You shrugged, uncomfortable with the shift in the conversation. âThey were always good to me. Thatâs all.â
The server returned with dessert, a delicate plate of mochi and a pot of freshly brewed tea. Seonghwa gestured toward the dish. âTry the matcha one. Itâs their specialty.â
You picked one up and took a small bite, nodding in approval. âNot bad.â
He laughed softly. âNot bad is high praise coming from you.â
You shot him a look but couldnât help the small smile tugging at your lips.
As the meal wrapped up, Seonghwa glanced at the time and stood. âReady to head back?â
You nodded, following him out to the car. The night air was crisp, and the stars were faintly visible against the dark sky.
Sliding into the passenger seat, you glanced at him as he adjusted the rearview mirror. âYou didnât drink tonight,â you noted.
He flashed a quick grin. âSomeone had to drive.â
You smirked. âResponsible and considerate. Who knew?â
He chuckled as he pulled out of the parking lot, the car humming softly as it began the descent back down the hill. âDonât get used to it.â
The drive was quiet but not unpleasant. You found yourself stealing glances at him, surprised by the unexpected side of Seonghwa youâd seen tonight. He seemed focused on the road, his hands steady on the wheel, but his presence filled the quiet space between you.
âYouâre awfully quiet,â he remarked after a while, glancing at you briefly before returning his attention to the road.
âJust⌠thinking,â you replied, shifting slightly in your seat.
He arched an eyebrow. âAbout what?â
You hesitated, unsure if you wanted to share your thoughts. âAbout tonight,â you said vaguely.
He chuckled softly, his lips curling into a small smile. âWhat about tonight? The food? The view? Or⌠me?â
You shot him a look, your cheeks warming slightly. âDonât flatter yourself.â
âToo late,â he teased, the smirk not leaving his face.
Rolling your eyes, you turned your attention to the window, watching the city lights grow brighter as you neared Seoul. âI was just surprised, thatâs all. Tonight wasnât what I expected.â
âIn a good way, I hope?â he asked, his tone suddenly less teasing and more curious.
You didnât answer immediately, considering your words carefully. âIt was⌠different. Iâll leave it at that.â
He let out a low laugh, shaking his head. âAlways so guarded. You havenât changed much.â
The comment made you stiffen slightly, your gaze snapping back to him. âAnd you think you know me so well?â
âIâve known you for years, Y/N,â he replied, his voice calm but firm. âMaybe not everything about you, but enough to know how you are.â
The weight of his words hung in the air, stirring memories youâd long tried to bury. Memories of the nights youâd spent together in college, and the way heâd brushed it off as though it meant nothing.
You looked away, your voice quiet. âMaybe you donât know me as well as you think.â
The silence that followed was thick with unspoken tension, but Seonghwa didnât push further.
As the car turned onto your familyâs driveway, the mansion loomed ahead, its windows glowing warmly against the night. He pulled to a smooth stop near the front entrance, cutting the engine.
âThanks for tonight,â you said, your voice a little more composed as you unbuckled your seatbelt.
He nodded, leaning back in his seat. âAnytime.â
You reached for the door handle but paused, glancing back at him. âWhy did you take me there?â
He looked at you, his gaze steady. âBecause I thought you deserved a real dinner, not something staged for appearances.â
The sincerity in his tone caught you off guard, and for a moment, you werenât sure how to respond.
âGoodnight, Seonghwa,â you said finally, stepping out of the car before he could say anything else.
As you walked toward the door, you could feel his gaze on you, lingering like a question you werenât ready to answer.
-x-x-x-
The week flew by in a whirlwind of meetings and deadlines, and before you knew it, Friday evening had arrived. You found yourself standing in front of your closet, deliberating on what to wear to Yeosangâs 30th birthday party.
The party was being held at Mingiâs bar, a sleek and exclusive venue that was a favorite among your social circle. Yeosang, who you had known since he was still crawling around in diapers, had insisted on a lively celebration, and you werenât about to miss it.
You finally settled on a fitted, navy cocktail dress with subtle sequins that shimmered under the light, pairing it with silver heels. After one final glance in the mirror, you grabbed your clutch and headed out.
When you arrived, the bar was already buzzing with energy. A live DJ played upbeat music, and laughter and chatter filled the air. The space had been reserved entirely for the party, with a section of tables arranged for gifts and a custom cake shaped like a stethoscope and a scalpelâa nod to Yeosangâs career. His family owned a chain of hospitals and he was a fourth year resident in neurosurgery. His mother was the doctor that took care of your momâs pregnancy with you and your twin.
âY/N!â
You turned to see Yeosang himself, looking dashing in a tailored suit. He greeted you with a wide smile, pulling you into a warm hug.
âHappy birthday, Yeosang,â you said, handing him a small, elegantly wrapped gift.
âYou didnât have to, but thank you!â He beamed, placing the gift on the table before turning back to you. âYou look amazing, by the way. Are you planning to steal the spotlight from me tonight?â
You laughed. âHardly. This is your night, doctor.â
As you exchanged a few more pleasantries, Hongjoong appeared beside you, his arm draped casually over your shoulder. âThere you are,â he said. âI thought youâd back out last minute.â
âNot this time,â you replied, rolling your eyes. âItâs Yeosangâs 30th. How could I miss it?â
âGood,â Yeosang said, grinning. âNow, go grab a drink and have fun. You work too much, Y/N.â
You chuckled, nodding as you made your way to the bar.
At the counter, you spotted Nari sitting beside Yunho, her cheeks flushed as she laughed at something he had said. Yunho caught sight of you and waved.
âY/N!â he called out. âJoin us!â
You smiled and approached, Nari immediately scooting over to make room.
âHi, Ms. Y/N,â Nari said cheerfully, her tone more relaxed than usual. âIsnât this place amazing?â
âIt is,â you replied, ordering a drink. âMingi always outdoes himself. You donât need to use honorifics with me, Nari, weâre not at work.â
Nari nodded with a smile. âIâll try.â
As you sipped your cocktail, a familiar voice behind you made you turn.
âFancy seeing you here,â Seonghwa said, his tone teasing.
He was dressed sharply, as always, in a dark blazer and slacks that complemented his broad shoulders. His hair was slightly tousled, giving him a more casual yet polished look.
âSeonghwa,â you acknowledged coolly, raising your glass slightly. âSurprised you made it.â
âWhy? Because Iâm such a workaholic?â he replied, smirking. âEven I take breaks occasionally, Ms. CEO.â
âRare, but good to know,â you said, turning your attention back to your drink.
Hongjoong appeared moments later, clapping Seonghwa on the back. âCome on, man. Letâs go grab a drink and join the others.â
Seonghwa gave you a lingering glance before following Hongjoong into the crowd.
As the night went on, the music grew louder, and the atmosphere became more spirited. You found yourself chatting with old friends and acquaintances, laughing and catching up. But every now and then, you felt Seonghwaâs gaze on you from across the room, a quiet intensity that was impossible to ignore.
The music pulsed through the bar, the crowd thickening as more guests arrived. You were just about to grab another drink when you noticed a familiar face making his way toward you. Jaehwan.
âY/N,â he greeted you with a bright smile, his presence as confident as ever. âLong time no see.â
You tensed slightly but masked it with a smile, trying to keep things cordial. âJaehwan. Didnât expect to see you here.â
âYeosang and I go way back, you know? We work together now,â he said with a casual shrug, his dark eyes glimmering with a hint of amusement. âAnd with you being here, itâs the perfect chance to catch up. Can I get you a drink?â
You didnât particularly want to spend more time with him, but you couldnât exactly brush him off. âIâm good, thanks.â
He raised an eyebrow at your response, clearly not used to being turned down. âOh, come on. Just one drink. For old timesâ sake?â
You hesitated. The history you shared with Jaehwan was complicated. You had been together for years, but it was always an exhausting cycle of breaking up and making up, seeing other people in the middle, until one day, you simply couldnât do it anymore.
âHonestly, Jaehwan, Iâm not interested in reminiscing right now,â you replied, trying to keep your tone light but firm. âIâm just here to enjoy the party.â
Jaehwan didnât seem put off by your words. Instead, his grin only grew. âYouâre still as beautiful as ever, you know?â He leaned in just a little closer, his voice dropping to a more intimate tone. âIâve seen you in the news and in interviews, but youâre even more stunning in person.â
Your eyes flicked away, trying to avoid the lingering gaze that made you uncomfortable. âThanks,â you said, though you didnât quite mean it. âI should get back to Yeosang.â
Before you could step away, Jaehwan reached out, gently placing a hand on your arm. âYou know, I never understood why we ended things. We were so good together, Y/N.â His voice was soft, almost coaxing, as though trying to reopen a door you had carefully shut.
You stiffened, feeling your chest tighten. âWe werenât good together. Not in the long run.â
Jaehwanâs expression faltered slightly, but only for a second. âYouâre still holding onto that, huh?â he asked, his voice tinged with a mix of disbelief and frustration. âI thought we were past it. You never gave me a real chance to explain.â
You looked him square in the eyes, your heart racing. âThereâs nothing to explain, Jaehwan. We both know how it ended. And why.â
His face softened for a moment, the charm slipping, replaced by something more genuine. âI was an idiot, Y/N. I know that now. I shouldnât have played with your feelings like I did.â He paused, searching your face as if trying to read you. âBut Iâm here now. If you want to talk, start fresh... Iâm open to it.â
You exhaled slowly, feeling your frustration rise again. Youâd put so much energy into moving on from him, and here he was, trying to pull you back into his orbit. âI donât want to start fresh, Jaehwan. Iâve moved on. Iâm not interested in going backwards.â
His face tightened, though his smile never completely disappeared. âThatâs a shame. I always thought we had something special.â
You shook your head, stepping back slightly, creating some distance. âWe did. But that was a long time ago.â
As you took a step back to leave the conversation behind, Jaehwan called out, his voice softer than before. âIâll always be here if you change your mind, Y/N. Donât forget that.â
You turned on your heel, walking toward the other side of the bar, not wanting to hear any more. It had been a long time since youâd seen him, but the feelings his presence stirred up were all too familiarâfrustration, confusion, and that lingering sense of unresolved tension. But you reminded yourself that it was okay. It was okay to feel whatever you felt. Six years of being with someone is a long time.
Meanwhile, across the bar, Seonghwa had noticed the exchange from a distance. He stood talking to Mingi, San, and Jongho, but his eyes kept flicking over to where you were conversing with Jaehwan.
âWho was that guy with Y/N? Seems familiar.â Seonghwa asked casually, though there was a slight edge to his tone.
Mingi followed his gaze. âOh, thatâs Jaehwan. Heâs a doctor, works with Yeosang. He and Y/N used to date... for a long time, actually.â
Seonghwaâs lips tightened. âOh. That was the guy?â He knew you were dating someone previously, but he didnât really ask Hongjoong for any details before, and Hongjoong never told him anything about it. You kept your relationship strictly private, so there were no articles about this either,
San, ever the one to offer the juicy details, spoke up. âYeah, they were on and off for years. Six years, I think. But they finally broke up for good. Y/Nâs pretty done with him.â
Seonghwaâs gaze darkened as he watched Jaehwan take a step closer to you to talk to you again, leaning in just a bit too much for his liking. âI see. And he thinks he has a chance?â
Jongho raised an eyebrow, surprised by the fact that Seonghwa was concerned about you. âSounds like it. But I wouldnât worry too much, Seonghwa. Y/N doesnât seem interested in going back down that road.â
Seonghwa didnât respond immediately, his eyes still trained on you, the lines of his jaw tightening ever so slightly.
âI wouldnât be so sure,â he muttered under his breath, his focus now entirely on the conversation unfolding between you and Jaehwan.
You were trying to shake off the lingering tension from your conversation with Jaehwan when you turned to the bartender and ordered a blowjob shot, hoping the sweet, creamy taste would ease your nerves.
Jaehwan, however, wasnât finished. He leaned in again, the subtle scent of cologne still lingering around him. "I still don't understand, Y/N," he said with a low chuckle. "You and I could make it work again. I mean, we've always had chemistry, right?"
You gave him a tight smile, the first sip of the shot barely numbing the irritation bubbling in your chest. "Jaehwan, I told you already. I donât think this is going to work out. Letâs just leave it at that."
But Jaehwan wasn't ready to let go. "Come on, you canât just throw away everything we had. I know you still feel something, Y/N." His hand brushed your arm, a touch too familiar, and you fought the urge to pull away.
Seonghwa had enough, and he made his way through the crowd. He moved with purpose, his sharp gaze landing on you and Jaehwan, his posture stiff with a quiet authority that demanded attention.
Jaehwan, oblivious to Seonghwa's growing irritation, smiled as he leaned a little closer to you. "I know you and I had our issues, butâ"
Seonghwaâs voice interrupted him, smooth yet firm. "I think youâve had enough time with my fiancĂŠe."
You froze, Jaehwan blinking in surprise. âFiancĂŠe?â He glanced from Seonghwa to you, confusion and curiosity in his eyes. âWait, since when are you twoââ
Without waiting for a response, Seonghwa took a step forward, his eyes never leaving Jaehwan. But it was his attention on you that made your heart skip a beat. As you took another sip of the shot, a small smear of whipped cream lingered on your bottom lip.
Seonghwa noticed, and before you could react, he reached forward, his thumb gently brushing against your lower lip to wipe away the cream. His touch was tender but purposeful, his gaze never leaving yours.
Jaehwanâs eyes widened in disbelief, clearly caught off guard by the intimate gesture. "What the hell?" he muttered under his breath, his posture stiffening as he tried to regain some control of the situation. âWho are you, again?â
Seonghwaâs voice was cool, yet there was a hint of something protective behind it. "Iâm Park Seonghwa. Y/Nâs fiancĂŠ." He didnât give Jaehwan a chance to respond before adding, "We havenât made our relationship public yet."
Jaehwanâs gaze flicked to your hand, taking note of the lack of a ring. "But⌠thereâs no ring," he remarked, his voice edged with confusion. "Is this some kind of⌠business arrangement?"
Seonghwaâs lips curved into a slight smirk, the tension between them almost palpable. "Like I said, our relationship isnât public yet," he said coolly, his eyes flicking to you for a moment before returning to Jaehwan. "Weâre keeping things under wraps for now."
Jaehwan stood there, stunned and silent, his gaze shifting from Seonghwa back to you, as if trying to piece together the situation. He clearly hadnât expected this turn of events, and his earlier confidence had evaporated, replaced by a mix of surprise and frustration.
You, on the other hand, found yourself caught in a strange moment of both relief and discomfort. Seonghwaâs intervention had put an end to Jaehwanâs persistence, but it also dragged you into a deeper web of lies you werenât sure you were ready to untangle.
"Well," Jaehwan said after a long pause, forcing a smile that didnât quite reach his eyes, "Iâll let you two be, then. Enjoy the party, Y/N." With that, he turned and walked off, leaving you and Seonghwa alone once again.
The atmosphere between you and Seonghwa felt heavy, and as much as you wanted to keep a cool, composed exterior, you couldnât shake the tension in the air. Seonghwa had taken control of the situation, but now, it seemed like there were even more unspoken words hanging between you two.
Seonghwa didnât immediately speak, but when he did, his voice was quieter, almost amused. "Youâre welcome."
You shot him a look, not sure whether you should thank him or be frustrated. "What was that all about?"
Seonghwa shrugged, his expression unreadable. "He was getting too comfortable. You shouldnât have to deal with that."
You couldnât argue with that, though it still left a bad taste in your mouth. "You didnât have to step in like that."
He tilted his head, his eyes softening for a brief moment. "I know, but I wanted to. And Iâll do it again if I have to."
You let out a small sigh, your heart fluttering in a way that confused you. The night wasnât what you expected, but somehow, you werenât sure you minded it as much as you thought you would.
Seonghwa turned toward the bar, signaling for another drink. "Come on, you need to enjoy the rest of the party. And besides, you canât have your ex running around ruining your night."
Two shots later, followed by a series of light-hearted conversations with various people, and the buzz from the alcohol was finally starting to set in. The warmth spread through your body, making your head feel lighter, the edges of your thoughts blurring slightly. You leaned back in your seat, your laughter ringing a little louder than you intended, but for once, you didnât mind. You could feel the weight of the night slowly drifting away, the constant tension easing off your shoulders.
Realizing you needed a break, you excused yourself from the crowd and made your way to the restroom. The cool air of the barâs hallway seemed to clear your head for a moment, and when you returned, you didnât feel quite as dizzy as before. You spotted the balcony just ahead, where a few people were gathered, some leaning over the railing, smoking and chatting. The fresh air felt good against your skin, and you welcomed the solitude, a brief reprieve from the noise inside.
You pulled out your phone, unlocking it and glancing at the screen. Yeriâs message was waiting for you.
Yeri: Howâs everything going? Are you okay?
You couldnât help but smile at her caring tone. You quickly typed your response:
You: Iâm good. Just needed some air. Itâs been a lot tonight, but Iâm managing. I'll tell you everything later.
After sending the message, you leaned against the railing, letting the cool breeze calm your senses. The bustling sounds from the bar seemed far away, and you closed your eyes for a moment, letting the moment of peace sink in.
But of course, peace never lasted long.
You heard footsteps approaching, and before you could turn around, Seonghwaâs voice reached you, smooth and just a little concerned. "You okay out here?"
You opened your eyes and glanced at him. He stood just behind you, his posture relaxed but his eyes watching you closely, as though taking stock of your every movement. You werenât sure if it was the alcohol or just the sheer intensity of the situation, but you felt suddenly boldâbold in a way you hadnât felt in a while.
"Yeah, just needed a break from all the...," you trailed off, glancing back towards the loud, crowded bar. "Everything." You laughed softly, then, almost to yourself. "Itâs kind of overwhelming."
Seonghwa nodded, stepping closer, the space between you narrowing slightly. "I get it. But you should be careful. Youâve had a few drinks tonight." His voice was softer now, gentler, though there was a hint of concern in his eyes.
You tilted your head, meeting his gaze directly, a flicker of challenge lighting your chest. "What, you think I canât handle a couple of drinks?" The words were a little sharper than you intended, but the alcohol had given you the courage to tease him in a way you wouldn't normally do.
He smirked, his lips curving upward in that way that made your heart skip. "Iâm not worried about you handling them," he replied, voice low and laced with something unreadable. "Iâm just worried you might get too comfortable."
Your breath caught for a moment. It wasnât the first time you had noticed how close he was now, his presence almost tangible, like he was becoming a part of the space you occupied. The air between you seemed to thicken, and for a moment, it was just the two of you, the buzz of the party a distant hum.
"Too comfortable?" you repeated, feeling the boldness rise within you like a wave. You took a step closer to him, unconsciously closing the distance, your eyes scanning his face, trying to decipher the sudden shift in his expression. "And why would that be a problem?"
Seonghwaâs eyes flickered down to your lips before returning to meet your gaze. The tension between you two felt palpable, like an invisible thread pulling you closer despite the divide you tried to maintain. He didnât answer immediately, his silence only making the moment more charged, more electric.
"Youâre a lot different when youâre not all business," he said quietly, the playful edge of his voice barely masking the undercurrent of something else. "Maybe Iâm starting to see the real you, Y/N."
Your heart raced at the comment, and you felt your breath hitch in your chest. The alcohol had loosened your inhibitions, but there was something about the way Seonghwa spoke, something about the way he was looking at you, that made you forget for a moment why you were supposed to stay guarded.
You leaned in slightly, your eyes locked with his, and a teasing smile spread across your face. "Maybe you like what youâre seeing."
The words came out almost too easily, the playful challenge in your tone not entirely fake. You could feel your pulse quickening, the thrill of the moment swirling around you.
Seonghwa's eyes darkened just a shade, his lips curling into a smile that was both amused and intrigued. "I think you're right," he said, his voice low, as though he was daring you to take the next step, to push the boundaries further.
For a heartbeat, you two stood there, neither of you moving, the tension thick and humming between you. You had no idea where this was going, no clue what would happen next, but you knew one thing for sure: you were no longer just playing along. Tonight felt different. And the way Seonghwa was looking at youâit seemed like he felt it too.
The moment hung in the air, electric and heady, as the rest of the world seemed to fade into the background. Â You were suddenly aware of how close Seonghwa was, how much you could feel the heat of his body, the rapid rise and fall of his chest as he inhaled deeply. Without thinking, you moved, wrapping your arms around his neck, pulling him closer until there was barely any space between the two of you. His breath hitched slightly at the closeness, and for a moment, neither of you spoke.
"Why are we always in this situation when we've had a couple of drinks?" you asked, your voice quieter now, a bit more vulnerable. You could feel the weight of your words, the tension that had been building between you and him finally reaching its peak.
Seonghwa took a deep breath, his hands resting gently on your waist, and you felt a surge of something strongerâsomething that made you tilt your head just slightly, brushing your lips against his. "You're not going to want me if I make a move," you said, your voice lower, almost a warning.
"I've always wanted you," he whispered against your mouth.
For a moment, everything seemed to stand stillâthe world, the music, the people inside the barâall faded away, leaving only the two of you standing in the cool night air. But then, just as quickly, you pulled back, your breath unsteady, your heart pounding harder than it had a moment ago.
"I'm not falling for that," you said, your voice strained, almost harsh, as if you were trying to distance yourself from the vulnerability that had crept in.
Seonghwaâs expression faltered slightly, and he reached out to touch your arm, as if trying to stop you from pulling away further. But you were already taking a step back, and you could see the hurt flash in his eyes, the confusion.
"I donât want to resent you more," you whispered, your voice small, almost fragile. The words were like a knife to your chest, and as soon as they left your lips, you regretted saying them. The hurt was suddenly evident in your eyes, and the alcohol that had fueled your boldness before was now making everything seem more raw, more real.
Seonghwaâs eyes widened, and his lips parted as if he wanted to say something. But no words came, just the heavy silence that fell between you two. For a moment, you thought he might try to reach for you again, but you turned away, already feeling the sting of regret that followed your confession.
You didnât wait for him to speak. You just turned and left him standing there, the cool night air around you suddenly feeling colder than it had before. You didnât know what you expected from him, but what you knew for sure was that you needed to get away from thisâaway from the tension, the confusion, and the feelings that had begun to resurface.
You quickly made your way back to the entrance of the bar, trying to keep your composure. As you stepped inside, you spotted Hongjoong in the crowd, chatting with a few people near the bar. The moment he saw you, his eyes softened with concern.
"Ready to go?" he asked, his voice gentle.
You nodded, trying to mask the storm of emotions swirling inside you. "Yeah. Let's go home," you said, your voice quieter than usual. You didnât look back at Seonghwa, though you could feel his presence lingering in the back of your mind, heavy and unrelenting.
As you and Hongjoong made your way out of the bar after saying your goodbyes to your friends, you tried to shake off the weight of what had just happened. You didnât know how to feel about Seonghwa anymore, nor about the admission that had slipped from your lips.
-x-x-x-
End of Part One.
#ateez#ateez ff#ateez fanfiction#ateez seonghwa#seonghwa#park seonghwa#ateez series#ateez park seonghwa#ateez angst#ateez fics#ateez ceo au#ceo seonghwa#choi san#wooyoung#jung wooyoung#kang yeosang#song mingi#kim hongjoong#ateez imagines#choi jongho#ateez fluff#ateez x reader#seonghwa x reader#ateez scenarios#ateez seonghwa x reader#ateez seonghwa smut#ateez seonghwa imagine#ateez seonghwa fanfic#ateez jongho#ateez hongjoong
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âšââĄâ⥠jim refuses to leave the office without you after your lame boyfriend forgets to pick you up from work.. again..
warnings: just a little bit of angst, jim is jealous and frustrated, comfort (?), slight fluff, cheating (but not really???)
a/n: ditzy!reader only has a boyfriend in this fic alone, not as part of her entire !reader lore <3 send in jim reqâs!
âbyeee!â you adjusted the pink scarf around your neck as phyllis and bob vance from âvance refrigerationâ drove away, both of them waving at you with wide smiles plastered on their faces. god, it was cold out here. âcome on, roy..â you whispered to yourself, poking your head out to look at the entrance of the parking lot. small clouds formed with each breath you exhaled, the cold pennsylvania air nipping at the skin of your cheeks and the tip of your nose. you watched as everyone filed out of the building one by one, your heart sinking to your stomach as the sun set further down the horizon.
sighing out in frustration, you scrambled through your purse for your phone, the bag slipping from your fingers before the contents tumbled out onto the concrete. you laughed to yourself, just thinking about how much more embarrassing can this get. your boyfriend had obviously forgotten all about picking you up for the second time this week, your favorite lipglosses are rolling down the pavement, the tubes only getting further out of armâs reach, and your skirt is far too tight for you to pick up your stuff without looking awkward and frazzled.
âthis is the worst..â you speed walked down the parking lot, your heels clicking against the walkway until jim came out, wasting no time in jogging over. âhey, what are you still doing here?â he followed your line of vision, quickly getting your stuff off of the ground before towering over you. your cheeks always heated at the height difference between you two, a hint of a smile playing on jimâs lips when he saw the flustered expression on your pretty face. ân-no reason! uhm, something came up with roy, so iâmââ before you could finish whatever lie was going to slip from your tongue, he interrupted you.
âagain? does he know itâs like twenty degrees out here?â
jim was irritated to say the leastâ but not with you. never at you. he took off his coat, draping it over your shoulders before guiding you back inside. âwait here while i go warm up the car real quick, alright?â he didnât give you time to object, leaving you in the warm lobby as he stepped out in nothing but a button up. deciding to dial roy one more time, you rolled your eyes when the call went straight to voicemail. you shouldâve known it wouldnât have gone through. throwing the damned thing back in your purse, you didnât wait longer than five minutes before jim pulled up right out front.
he opened the door for you, his face bright red from the cold as he motioned for you to come outside. âjim, you really donât have to do this! i was just about to go to the bus stop.â you stayed seated, shrugging off his coat as he shook his head. âand let you sit out in this weather? absolutely not.â he almost sounded offended, his tall figure coming inside once again to scoop you up in his arms. âreally, jim, it wouldnât be the first time, iââ opening the passenger door, he sat you down gently, cutting you off before you could make up a ridiculous excuse for your boyfriend who clearly didnât care if you froze halfway to death.
when jim was in his seat, he couldnât help but squeeze the steering wheel with an unforgiving grip. âiâm sure roy got caught up with something, itâs fine, truly!â why were you still trying to defend him? roy was the last person who deserved to be with you. the guy doesnât even send you work flowers for christâs sake! he blatantly checks out other girls in front of you, which jim could never wrap his head around because to him you were the only person who existed inside of a room, he never let you go out with your work buddies, and he sure as hell never complimented you.. at least not in the way you should be getting complimented.
it took a lot to get jim upset, but seeing the way your smile falters when roy dismisses something you say, or the way the sparkle in your eyes dim when he doesnât react to something new about you. your hair, for example. you had got it done, the style suiting you perfectly, making you look so cute and pretty, all just for roy to not even acknowledge your new âdo. he remembered you having to excuse yourself to the ladies room and seeing your glossy eyes avoid everyoneâs gaze as you zoned out of the conversation roy was so focused on rambling about once you came back.
so bad, jim just wanted to ask what on earth you saw in him. of course, he wouldnât do that, but heâd be lying if he said he didnât wrack his brain pretty often for an answer. âiâm sure he got busy,â jim agreed, not wanting to push the situation, âdo you think heâs home?â you blinked. he definitely had to be at home. âno.â you lied, meeting jimâs eyes, âwhy?â please ask me out, please ask me out, you repeated in your head. âah, well, i donât know about you, but i can really go for a hot chocolate from retroâs..â retros. that was your usual spot for whenever jim treated you to lunch.. which was almost everyday.
please say yes, please say yes, he pleaded silently as a sudden smile made its way to your lips. âwith jumbo marshmallows and a croissant?â jim chuckled. âyeah, whatever you want.â
#â¤ď¸â âš works#âËâšâĄ ditzy!reader#âËâšâĄ jim halpert#the office#the office fanfiction#the office imagine#the office smut#the office x reader#jim halpert#jim halpert x reader#jim halpert fanfiction#jim halpert smut#jim halpert imagine
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give me vi who's just a total hot mess...
Don't get me wrong, I love confident Vi who knows exactly what she's doing, a little smug and self-assured that she knows exactly what you like and how to give it to you. Who always has a shadow of a smirk tugging at her lips. But I feel we're sleeping on canon Viâlike that girl was a mess. Did you not see the way she looked at Cait?! My girl is the definition of "sure babe whatever you say".
So here's some little hot mess Vi headcanons I love
She's always bumping into stuff. She's got bruises all over her hips and legs from the amount of times she's caught herself on the table corner or counter top. It's gotten to the point where if there's a cupboard door open on a high shelf, you automatically cover the corner with your hand when Vi's around because she'd pretty much guaranteed to bang her head.
On that note, she's always dropping things. She's not allowed to touch the fancy dinner plates or empty the dishwasher because of it. Every few months you have to buy new glasses because yup, the others are all somehow broken. Again. ("I don't understand where they all go!" Vi complains, genuinely confused "I can't have broken them all.... did I?" Spoiler alert she did, in fact, break them all.)
Still on that note, she trips over everything. Everything, her path could be completely clear and she'd still stumble. It's sort of endearing, like you're leaving your flat and she's tripping over the front matâ"Who the fuck put that there?" She's so indignant it makes you smile. "We did, it's a mat. You know, the thing that goes before a door?"
When undressing you or tugging off her own clothes, she'll inevitably get an arm tangled, or struggle with buttons or a belt buckle. It always makes you both laugh a bit, because she's always so impatient and gets stuck on the smallest things. "Who the fuck invented these?" she laughs, amused at herself, her shaky fingers. But when you try to help she'll whine, "No, no, almost got it." (Half of your clothes end up ripped when she inevitably loses patience.)
She's super clever and can pick up things pretty quickly, but she's always trying to cut corners and experiment to make it "easier." Baking? Who needs all that measuring crap, she can just eyeball it. And sure, the cake tastes amazing, but it also swelled up like a balloon because she accidentally tipped in half the container of baking soda. The fire alarm gets set off at least once a week; now if you smell smoke you just... leave her to it.
She's super into tech and fixing stuff, which means lots of taking things apart, and the odd yelp here and there as she gives herself small electric shocks. One time you come home to smoke wafting through the kitchen, the distinct smell of burning rubber and a very sheepish Vi, who accidentally melted some kitchen utensils. How?! You don't even ask. (After that she has to work in the garage.)
She's always covered in grease from "improving" things on her motorbike. You're terrified every time she takes it for a spin, thinking for sure one of those "improvements" is going to get her in some sort of trouble.
Climbing onto the roof without shoes to fix something, sticking her hand through a dubious hole in the wall without gloves, leaning close to a faulty socket without glasses. "Hey, don't panic Cupcake, what's the worst that could happen, huh?" and you wave a wild hand around "Ugh, you could die?!"
Like sure, she's confident and daring and smirks her way through everything, but also laughs until she chokes, and pulls every "push" door, and basically will fall over her own feet if she's not gripping your hand. She thinks dad jokes are hilarious and doesn't know her way around your neighbourhood even though she literally grew up there. Whenever she's out you'll inevitably get a "hey I'm lost" call. "Where are you?" "Uhhh, like... opposite a post office?" You think for a second, orientating yourself. "Okay, turn so the post office is on your left, and keep walking." There's dubious silence from Vi's end and you sigh, biting back a smile. "Your left, like the hand you write with." "Ohh! Got it, got it..."
In a new city it's even worse, because she refuses to use maps. "Who needs directions when you can have adventure and discovery!!" "Vi, I'd hardly call the red-light district of Paris adventure, I just wanna see the bloody Eiffel Tower!"
Walking out in the sexist outfit ever, tattoos on full display, chains around her waist and looking unholy in steel capped boots, and your mouth has never been so dry in your whole life and "Hey Cupcake, can you help me? The stupid zip is tangled..."
anyway disaster Vi everyone, she has my whole heart
#arcane#arcane s2#vi x reader#arcane league of legends#arcane vi#lesbian#vi fanfic#vi x you#wlw#sapphic#salvie writes#vi headcanons#vi arcane#league of legends
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B0osting update #3!
Ok so first of all, there will be no haul this weekend bc I extended the semester and I got exams this upcoming week (,:
Anyway:
On P0shmark I just sold my first clothing items today- a cashmere sweater for a profit of $85 and another sweater for $20 profit. Iâll be shipping those tomorrow.
As for èbĂ y- holy shit you guys itâs insane! Iâm actually shutting it down for a little while because I canât keep up with the orders. Today I had to pack and ship 12 packages (I failed, I only got five out lol) and I got I believe 7 or 8 new orders today. Total profit of $750 on makeup alone.
When it comes to what sells, Iâve noticed a few patterns but I havenât sold quite enough yet to be sure theyâre consistent. I originally only listed eyeshadow palettes and a few other things here and there because I assumed most people wouldnât want the other stuff bc itâs harder to return and to know if itâs your color. But it turns out, lip stuff sells really well- and not the Dior stuff either, itâs mostly the mid-range brands because people want those anyway and if your listing is the lowest price, they go for it. My top lip sales have been Laura Mercier and Ole Henriksen.
Also, I originally thought that I could put the ideal price as the buy it now price and just turn offers on and Iâd get all the business I would get if it were a lower buy it now price- but it turns out a lot of people are actually pretty shy (lol me too) and they simply wonât make an offer no matter what, so Iâve lowered some prices for the socially anxious folks and those listings sold.
Now moving on to the shadows and palettes- most of my sales have been one or two items, but surprisingly Iâve had buyers who bought 8 or 9 items, usually palettes, at once. One poor girl begged me to hold onto stuff for her until she gets her paycheck, which made me feel kinda bad because girl why are you spending your obviously very little money on makeup?? But hey maybe sheâs in high school or smth, idk. At first I assumed they were reselling (which, I mean, I canât really complain cause I got it for free đ¤ˇââď¸), but it kind of seems like theyâre just foreigners in big cities trying to look rich lol. Each time itâs a Chinese name and itâs from nice areas of L.A. Idk I could be wrong, but I think some people just want a lot of makeup I guess. Anyway, my most popular items were rare or limited edition (I didnât even know they were but thankfully èbay told me haha). Dior limited editions went super fast for $75 each, and people LOVE YSL stuff but only in the common colors, they donât want couture clutches in the less popular colors. I learned I have to price rarer colors for less sometimes, not more, because people search for the shade they want. All my Pat McGrath and Anastasia palettes have sold. I have a ton of Dior and LancĂ´me and Clinique in stock as you guys know- like probably at least 30 palettes from each brand. Quite a few Dior palettes have sold, but not a single LancĂ´me or Clinique product has- except for one individual eye shadow shade from LancĂ´me- no matter how low the price. Weâll see if that keeps up. Surprisingly again, Dior lip products and blush are simply not popular.
Iâve been packing them really nicely and throwing in a nail polish in each one and a lip balm in the big orders, but nothing has arrived at its destination yet so Iâm just hoping I get good reviews! Also like an idiot I lied about my age on eBay so Iâm scared my money will go out the window because itâs on hold while they verify my SSN.. I really hope not /:
Oh and I did start an èbay for my clothes, but I just listed six things to kind of gauge how it goes. So far I just got one comment on an item asking for measurements, but idk how to take those (,: same thing happened on p0shmark- if anybody knows pls help a girl out and hmu đĽ˛
Thatâs all Iâve got, and of course these are just my observations, they might not be completely accurate since Iâm just starting out, but Iâm hoping these updates will be helpful for some of you thinking of b0osting on these platforms. If anyone has any questions, just wants to chat, or wants me to nab smth for them even- hmu, Iâm always happy to chat (:
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is it real? TWST
It was another average day at Night Raven College, or at least as average as days could be at a magical academy. Yuu, the Prefect of Ramshackle Dorm, had been minding her own business in the alchemy lab when disaster struck. A misfired potion from Aceâunsurprisinglyâresulted in a cascade of chaotic reactions, one of which ended with Yuu being engulfed in a suspiciously glittery cloud of smoke.
Yuu coughed as the sparkles dissipated, her classmates staring at her in a mix of concern and curiosity. At first, she felt fineâno sudden tail growth or transformation into an animal. But by the time lunch rolled around, she began noticing something... strange. Her thoughts, usually kept securely locked behind her shy demeanor, were slipping out of her mouth unfiltered.
She realized this when she passed by Vil in the cafeteria and blurted, âHow do you manage to look so flawless even when youâre eating? Like, do you have a beauty aura or something?â Vil had merely raised an eyebrow and smirked, but Yuu had slapped her hands over her mouth in horror and hurried to her usual table.
Now seated with Ace, Deuce, and Jack, Yuu was doing her best to keep quiet and not embarrass herself further. But as the conversation meandered from homework to random gossip, her mind betrayed her once more.
âHey, Jack,â she said suddenly, interrupting a perfectly normal discussion about next weekâs flying class. âIs anything about the omegaverse real?â
The table went silent.
Ace choked on his juice, and Deuce froze mid-bite, his forkful of mashed potatoes hanging in the air. Jackâs ears twitched, and his normally composed demeanor faltered as he blinked at her in disbelief.
âW-What?â Jack stammered, his tail flicking nervously behind him.
Yuuâs brain screamed at her to shut up, but the words just kept coming. âI mean, youâre a beastman, and youâve got, like, heightened senses and stuff, right? So is there, like, some truth to all thatââ she waved her hands vaguely, âyou know, alpha, beta, omega dynamic stuff? Like, do beastmen have⌠you know, special instincts orâŚ?â
Jackâs face turned an alarming shade of red. âThatâs notâwe donâtâwhat are you even talking about?!â he sputtered, clearly flustered.
Ace was wheezing with laughter by now, practically collapsing onto the table. âOh my Seven, Prefect, I didnât know you had it in you! What kind of books are you reading?!â
Deuce, ever the earnest one, looked genuinely distressed. âYuu, are you feeling okay? That potion accident earlier⌠maybe itâs messing with your head.â
âYeah, that must be it,â Yuu mumbled, burying her face in her hands. âOh my god, why did I say that?â
Jack, still recovering from his embarrassment, crossed his arms and avoided eye contact. âFor the record, no, nothing about that⌠weird fiction stuff is true,â he muttered. âBeastmen are just⌠normal people with some different traits. Thatâs all.â
âGood to know,â Yuu said weakly, wishing she could sink into the floor and disappear.
âI think we need to take you back to the lab,â Deuce said, his expression one of genuine concern. âMaybe Professor Crewel can fix whateverâs going on with you.â
âPlease,â Yuu groaned, still hiding her face. âThe sooner, the better.â
As Ace continued to laugh and Jack tried to regain his composure, Yuu resolved to never set foot in the alchemy lab again. At least, not without a sturdy protective barrier between herself and any of Aceâs future experiments.
TAGLIST: @lunasmisosoup @soramcduckahyucky
DIVIDER: me :)
#twisted wonderland#x reader#jack howl#ace trappola#deuce spade#omegaverse#questions#crack fic#potion mishap#astro writes#oneshot#twst wonderland#twst#twisted wonderland disney#disney twst#twst mc#twisted wonderlan
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Treasure
#I collect stuff I find on the beach#I go out looking for stuff at least once a week#itâs my favourite thing to do and it makes me so happy#I also collect#fossils#sea glass#teeth#bones#crinoids#clay pipes#cool rocks#quartz#and anything else that is out of place#pottery#beach finds#treasure hunting#beach#seaside#coastal#island chronicles#island#Scotland#aesthetic#craft#my post
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they should make a life where you don't have appointments, work, school and scheduled events every single day for months on end
#i just wanna spend like 2 full days rotting in bed is that too much to ask#december i'm going on a vacation with family + gf and we're trying to schedule a lunch/dinner so that we can go over the itinerery#and other stuff like my gf is diabetic so she's going to tell everyone the procedures in case of an emergency etc#and the soonest i'm available for that is oct 20th like bruh#every week day i've got classes 7:30-11:50 work 13:00-17:00 and then gym therapy or futsal practice at night#oh and sometimes the professor that i'm the student assistant (? monitor in pt) for wants me to go to her night classes#and then on weekends i've got futsal practice sat morning usually a match either saturday or sunday legal advice clinic 4x a semester#and then birthdays friend group meetups (with ppl i haven't properly seen in a WHILE so i don't wanna bail) family stuff or gf's family stu#oh and i take care of the finances of our futsal team so there's that as well#and then when i'm free i spend my time with my love (who i mostly see on either day of the weekend and sometimes for dinner on weekdays)#those are my favorite âappointmentsâ i love spending time with her so much but even though we have quite a few staying in dates we also#pretty frequently go out to cafes restaurants parks meet up with mutual friends etc#so like... no bed rotting ever adfdsal#honestly i am not THAT busy compared to some ppl that i know#like i work from home most days of the week commute only 20 min to college am not a part of any study group etc etc#but man... that vyvense sure is working cause i do not think i would be able to do what i do now when my adhd was unmedicated#also i'm thinking of maybe getting a new internship next year cause even though i love my current one it's in public law which atm#is the field i'm thinking of getting into after school but getting into private law in brazil with only public law uni experience is#incredibly difficult. so i wanna be 100% sure i actually want public law. which means experiencing private law.#which means a private law internship#so i'm wondering how the fuck imma be able to pull that off next year#at least it pays much more than my current one! like probably double!#but honestly even with all the shit that i do and wishing i had more time for myself i've actually been so happy lately#i'm learning more at uni than i used to be able to i do pretty well at my internship i've got wonderful friends both old and new#my family is well and we get along like always i switched positions in futsal and am doing suprisingly good as a goalkeeper#and i'm in my first ever relationship. it's been almost 8 months till we made it official and it blows me away how good it's been#like we haven't faught once. disagreed on a couple things sure. but not a single fight and tbh even disagreements are very rare#idk we communicate and give each other grace and i just feel so loved. she knows me so well. i love her so so so so much.#like man just this saturday we were having an early dinner at a bakery. she stopped what she was saying and just stared at me smiling#and like i couldn't hold eye contact. cause she's so so fucking beautiful and she was looking at me with so much love and i had to look awa
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Daily Log 2
Trying out (probably just temporarily) making short daily-ish notes about things, in an attempt to see if it helps me be more reflective or productive lol.
Activities: Much less than yesterday, felt sick and sleepy so barely got anything done. It was also warmer inside today.. Very much dreading summer. I still feel like the people who ~~ love warm weather sooo much~~ must also have central heating and air and are able to escape the warmth, or at least have cool airy houses where they can get cross breezes or something.. I just fail to see how ANYONE could enjoy sweating all day because it's like 75F indoors, etc. grrbb,,, the headaches, sleepless sweaty nights, constant physical discomfort, etc. The next few days look cloudy and rainy though so.. yEs.. haha HA
Got a new charger for my old 2004 nokia phone so it actually turns on now, and recorded myself going through the ringtones and games. I might add the footage to a currently not fully edited video of me also looking through other electronics (old phones, turbo twist math, etc.). I love old ringtones actually and if I were rich, I would love to collect old phones specifically just to have a catalogue of what they're like and all of the sounds they contain.
Managed to have a tiny burst of energy and take photos of 3 outfits before my arms and shoulder started hurting and I got too warm.
Sent email to one doctor.
Translated like 3 words for the Avirrekava poem thing I mentioned yesterday. My language document is not organized very well at all so I've kind of lost my flow of working on it. I've heard about people making searchable dictionary type things for their conlangs, so I'd like to look more into that maybe. As well as making a custom font, though I don't know if that's more difficult for syllabaries (so wouldn't be directly linkable to a plain english alphabet keyboard?? eh?). Anyway, I need to finish the tapestry/painting thing/etc. soon though since I have no good place to put it. The canvas is warping a little just laying haphazardly on my closet floor lol.
Made one quick mspaint background image for the next batch of song snippet things for my jokey music youtube.
Edited like 10 minutes of the Giant Worldbuilding Slideshow Project.. couldn't focus on that either since being at the computer today irritated my shoulders and arms.
Notable sights: Saw 6 baby ducks and their parents swimming in a nearby pond!! It's interesting how their colors seem to change so much, and the young ones have the little spots on their back. Not much else, I was not very active lol..
Goals moving forward: Still working on consistent sleep schedule. Focus on social activities, finding new friends in the places I want to move, communicating with ones I have. Physical therapy exercises. Plant nasturtiums. Finish and upload videos, edit pictures, post the poll adventure thing that has been sitting in a draft for weeks (I thought I would get it done today, but alas.. I don't even have to do much, just proofread and post it, I just keep having no energy/being preoccupied with other things/hurts to be on computer.. grrr.. I want to continue the story lol >:T).
Notable foods: HAD ASPARAGUS YEaaaaaghhhHHHH!!!!!!!!! Asparagus SQUAD!!!!!!!!!! ... Also a few pieces of smoked gouda with lunch, one of my favorite cheeses.
#just posting these publicly since it feels more like I'm doing something or easier to hold yourself accountable if you make public#declarations of goals and progress or etc. .. perhaps.. for now..#I'm just curious to see if it helps. I know some poeple do diary style stuff or etc. on social media to help with productivity so#worth trying for like a week at least lol#tired and sleepy of being tired and sleepy though. Every day that stuff like chronic health problems or weather or etc.#interfere with me getting stuff done and it's all stuff that I've also had on my todo list for like.. weeks at this point it's like.. oughh#insurmountable tasks ever looming piling upon my shoulderes...#I've been 'supposed to call a lab to shedule blood work' for like a week and a half now and everyday I get the number#out and look at it and just go 'hmm.... sooon...' and then suddenly it's 10pm and I didn't#You Know How It Is Folks. I'm going to write myself a script of exactly what to say and also tape it to my computer screen#Sometimes that helps. lol#I dont' feel like I need a full on caretaker or something at this point but someitmes I do think like.. in a few years with my various#physical and mental issues it would be nice to have a Person Who Functions Normally Socially come visit me like once#every two weeks to help me plan things and make phone calls. Same with creative stuff too though. I bet I'd be doing something creative as#a career by now if I had like. an Assigned Neurotypical Extrovert to network for me and help me navigate things like that bjhbhj#hashtag hermit problems. etc. etc. (not just like 'a little weird and asocial' but like.. 'near complete inability to function in society'#type hermit problems lol..#ANYWAY.. ..#Also fighting the urge to have another personality typing phase. I can feel it creeping up. My 'once every 3 months when I get very#interested in the enneagram and other stuff again' type of thing. distracting myself with worldbuilding paintings instead ghgj#why don't you do a phone call for your blood work first maybe then you can spend 3 hours reading about tritypes or whatever#I have so many interests and hobbies but a handful of Main Ones and they never go away I just seem to take turns with them#Except worldbuilding I think that's always there. Genuinely again.. wish I could find some way to work that into a career. that is the only#thing I could to 1000 hours straight at any time of day under any circumstance. Kidnap me and lock me in a basement and I will be passing#my time thinking about what type of cheese elves make and all the things I'm going to write once I escape captivity ghjhj#EVEYRHTING else though lol.. kind of comes and goes. but can be annoying when it's suddenly the only thing my mind#wants to focus on. BUT yeagh.. ANYWAY... rambling again#daily log
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#wh. um. fuck.#dad's told me about my nan's will#and uh.#the money goes first to my grandad's looking after obviously#but um once he's not around (in a year or two dad saysâ with his alzheimers)#then it's split between the family in percentages ive forgotten - including my mumâ which is lovely#but basically in two/three years. i could have enough money to buy my own place.#ive no idea what my credit rating looks like in the least but i guess i have that amount of time to find out and sort it out#i imagine it's not very good - i don't have a credit card or anything like that but i haven't used my overdraft since i was at uni#but dad says i could get 60 grand! so if i buy somewhere with 60k up front and the rest as mortgage? right?#i have no clue whatsoever how to do all that stuff or even like how much furniture costs or how to choose a mattress or anything#ive never had anything like that new#so um. yeah. that's. something#i don't know what to do with it or anything. but it's a thing.#for now i need to go back and find a flat my own cs ive got like 6 weeks now to move from this place#and i have to ring the estate agent landlord people to find out if i can just move upstairs or what. cs that'd be my first choice honestly#but um. my brains gone to mush#i knew my grandparents were well-off but i didn't know it was by that much#or that id get such a high percentage - tho that's half what my dad's getting so i guess that makes sense#he says he's gonna buy a boat and go to south america#which sounds bonkers honestly like he's not a sailor whatsoever#but i guess he's a lot more sensible now he's been sober a year than he ever was when i was a kid
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Iâm feeling sooooooo hurt at my BFF rn and I have no way of talking abt it with her LOL Iâve been perseverating on this since last night and I donât feel better at all I hate this
#for reference of what happened:#we started skating together in January last year and have religiously gone together at least once a week since#even as I started speed skating lessons and she took more figure skating stuff#last night on the couch (we live together) she said she was going two times this week with her boyfriend#I asked if I could come to just one of them as my speed skating season is over and I havenât skated this week yet#she snapped no and said her bf wouldnât like that (?!?!)#I said oh...and asked if there was any skating on Saturday that I could go to I guess#like by myself#she told me where there was skating on Saturday then looked at me and snapped âhave fun skating by yourselfâ#when she could CLEARLY see I was a bit disappointed#like...to be honest I wasnât happy about being shoved out this week but the have fun by yourself comment was sooooo rude and Iâm so hurt
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Man one of my friends has a habit of accidentally saying or doing stuff that hurts me and I never know what to do cuz like I dont wanna be criticizing her/telling her off every 2 days cuz I KNOW she never means any harm so I know when she says/does hurtfull stuff she doesnt mean it but like it still hurts yk ??? But anytime i do tell her i feel like an ass and the thing is it doesnt make me feel any better cuz when she apologizes i just feel bad for her. But likee also i notixe the frustration building up within myself from her repeatedly hurting my feelings. But its never super big stuff and i dont wanna make her feel bad cuz like idk man shes so. Just like, fragile I guess that anything that makes her sad or upset immediately makes me feel horrible like its the emotional equivalent of yelling at a child or.something. BUT ALSO SHE JUST KEEPS HURTING ME !!!! genuinely from the bottom of.my heart askimg wtf im supposed to do like do I just swallow it down and wait for the feeling to pass. Or what. Cuz like its never lingering serious hurt or anything but it just keeps building up but like also she never criticzes me for anything and so by comparison i DO already "criticize" her a lot I guess and like. Man idk genuinely I dont know what to do
#Ok so like for example. I was wathcing a show rn and a character died. and i had been texting my friend a bit about the show over the last#few days as i was watching it so its not like it just came completely out of the blue . and i sent like a video of the death scene and#said something expressinf sadness about it like 'NOOOO WTF' or whatever and she just didnt respond to that at all and started talking about#something else so i thought maybe she missed it so i like drew attention to it again and she was like 'i dont know that character i had#nothing to say'#BRO ????#I dont. know most of the things my friends ever talk about and i still go along.#and like she does stuff like that at least once a week and its like. idk man obviously its not a big deal but its just something that#stings yk??#and like she has a lot of idk mannerisms or habits that just make me feel dumb or like im being stupid and its so frustrating idk#and like idk cause sometimes she acts idk normally enthusiastic but randomly out of nowhere she says stuff that makes me feel like im being#stupid if that makes sense ??#or like she ALWAYS has something negative or disagreeing to say and on one hand it feels dumb to get annoyed by it but like idk??#for example one time i was watcbing a movie and texted her a pic of the lead actor and said 'his face is like the exavt opposite of mine'#like as a sort of joke cause my face is soft with idk prominent features and that guys face was sharp with well idk sharper features like#he just looked like the opposite of me yk?? and it was clearly a joke#but.like she replied like 'i dont really see it' and started in detail comparing our faces ??#and like idk cuz like it annoyed me and made me feel stupid and also she has a habit of overanalyzing her and other peooles.looks and i#fucking HATE IT#but like at the same time well if that was her organic reply am I not a dick for getting annoyed ??? but like it just annoyed me idfk#and its always stuff like that but i feek like an ass if im always tellinf her everything she does wrong (obviously i dont do that but itd#feel lime that) and being so idk overly critical but also some small part of me just has started to resent her cause ???#she keeps accidentally saying stuff that hurts me and makes me feel stupid and in school she always keeps touching me and making annoying#noises and like ???? idk what it is cause i usually really like her and we are very close but sometimes she just does stuff that#IMMEDIATELY drives me up the wall ????#but like honest to god what if im the problem. ?? like am i overreacting or like accidentally being mean??#But like . the way she communicates i dont see a point in trying to tell her that she has a habit of accidentally hurting me cuz#what would it change except make her feel bad if that makes sense ??#and also its like. like then she'd probably be less comfortable around me cuz shes worried abt hurting me . or like itd be#awkward like when you kmow someones only doing smth cuz you asked them to yk ??
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and also it doesnt even matter if i miraculously get a job tmrw bc we don't have a car . and im too out of shape to walk anywhere bc everything is far away . so i genuinely dont jnow what to do
#im not smart or talented or hot enough to have a source of income working from home.#i dont have a ged or a kicense or a way to get to work or much experience + ive got a steadily fucking growing gap in my employment history.#And i have essentially 0 social skills i barely Function half the time im dissociated or just crying. im weak and out of shape and#not pretty im like. unhireable i think . and again even if a place did hire me I dont have a way to fucking get 2 work#i might be able to walk 2 a place if i had been at work for a while bc if be more used to being on my feet and active again. its take a#while and id be in a Lot of pain but like. itd be doable. and once i worked for s bit i could get lyfts even tho Expensive also idk that#there as many drivers here. and wtvr. but if i did that itd be Less money to help my family and less money to save up toget my own place and#atp maybe its selfish of me to want my own place and i need to judt be more grateful im allowed 2 stay here . yk#idk. im so tired i just need like. idk. ik the only way is to just get through it and get a job and make it work but it feels so pointless#everything always does. i cant keep getting over hurdles man im so fucking tired of getting through hurdles#every single day is Difficult and every single day is the Same and any time j manage to have a good day ill just go right back to feeling#exactly the same. and even if it looks like everythings better for a bit it all goes back down eventually and ik im supposed to be like But#itll get better again after that <3 ups and downs are a part of life <3 we have to have the bad to appreciate the good <3 im just fucking#sick of the goddamn bad im fucking sick of it ive had enough bad i want good. ik other ppl deserve it more i want everybody to have good#days and be safe and happy i don't want things to keep getting worse but everything just gets worse and all the good parts r tempirary and#im so tired. I am not your strongest soldier bro !!!#idk. i just want to be atable i dont need anything crazy i just want my family to live comfortably and to have enough money that i can#donate i rly donot need much i dont need that much food 2 survive i dont need a ton of space i dont need a nide house i like. i just want to#be Stable and know that everything will be ok. yk. at least 4 my family i want them all to be able to eat and the bills 2 be paid and#hopefully for lamp and the kids 2 go to college. bc lamp and tag both want to go to college and itsy is 6 so he soesnt care#but i want them to be able to so bad bc i can't and i ws never gonna be able to and i dont get to be whiny abt that but like. they want to#and theyre smart and passionate and like. i want them to be able to achieve their dreams and get to have normal lives and be fulfilled and#happy. yk. idk. annie showed me her schoolwork the other day and since it wa first week at like. an alt school it ws a lot of personality#type stuff and mental health stuff and im not gonna get into it bc its not mine to tell but. their answers for one of the things made me so#upset bc it sounded so much like me when i was their age and even now and it makes me feel so guilty that like. i didnt make it better for#them. im the one whos supposed to endure it and then theyre supposed to get to be happy but im too fuckinf weak nowadays and i can't keep#any of them safe or happy and i feel so insanely useless. i hate it i just want to be useful idc anymore like. i want to be good i want to#be helpful i want to be cared abt and its so selfish bc a part of me is like. Ohh wahhh we shouldnr have to do all that to be cared abt wahh#and its dumb bc Yes i do its my job. it just fucking sucks rn bc like i have all the like. sorrow over this being what i have to do and this#is my lot in life but i also have all the guilt over how im not doing it bc km lazy and selfish and i cant just work bc im . Ugh
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you know if i didn't get fucking let go without warning i really would be looking forward to the convicted felon conversations at work right about now
#i got along with all of the other employees well and we're friends but it's going to be impossible to look a few of them in the face if i#dont get to tell them Once that they're a motherfucking bitch for giving me literally 0 forewarning of not having a fucking job next week#despite knowing.#when i could have had the past week of basically no work due to logjams to prepare a resume and start outreaching in a chill and non desper#-rate terrified about going broke way#the number of people i've had to reach out to and be like 'hi its been three years but i got laid off and need you to introduce me'#and not it being very clear that i have at least situational resentment for them. i can't just hide stuff like that. unlike them.#that's my major complaint. it's not being let go tbh. its a startup in the worst industry on earth. but they Knew. probably months ago.#and it really tells my little autistic mind that i just need to stop expecting anything good from nt people.#because they will lie to your face that everything is fine when they know you're about to lose your job :)
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Being back is currently all about email email send another email answer to email read email email email reality check to see what's the status of different emails
#I don't mind it that much tho#I mean. it's basically prep work for the upcoming semester#which means I'll probably have a new week schedule by the first week of january#not bad#looking forward to it a bit :)#only thing that worries me atm is actually sending the emails :') I always fear I will look like a fool for some reason :'')#also I will get to participate to a choir once more<3 (this time I also get academic credits because it's a course I have to take lmao)#oh! and I have to give lessons on (at least) one day of the week because I sub for another teacher#I hope I manage to keep them all in the same day. I think it'd make it easier to do some time blocking with all the other stuff#ahhh this is exciting <3#should remember to keep studying for my uni exams tho lol#I'm trying not to think of my future master because I don't really think it's worth to think over while I'm not really close to finish#maybe I'll just check out the deadlines and see what's the latest one? So I know until which date I can postpone the problem?#anyway hope your day is going well <3#my post
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